#seeding round masterpost

[companion-showdown-dot-org]

Most Likely to Beat the Doctor's Ass, Seeding Round Masterpost

This tournament has now started, Masterpost Here

The criteria for this tournament have not been (poll here)

Group 1: Susan, Ian, Barbara, Vicki, Steven, Katarina, Sara Kingdom, Dodo

Group 2: Ben, Polly, Jamie, Victoria, Zoe, The Brigadier, Benton, Liz

Group 3: Jo, Yates, Sarah-Jane, Harry, Leela, K9, Romana I, Romana II

Group 4: Adric, Nyssa, Tegan, Turlough, Kamelion, Peri, Mel, Ace

Group 5: Grace, Chang Lee, Rose, Mickey, Adam, Jack, Martha, Wilf

Group 6: Donna, River, Amy, Rory, Kate, Clara, Handles, Bill

Group 7: Nardole, Yaz, Graham, Ryan, Dan, Fitz Kreiner, Evelyn Smythe, Frobisher

Group 8: Charley Pollard, C'rizz, Bernice Summerfield, Gillian and John Who, Iris Wildthyme, Lucie Miller, Hex Schofield, Alison Cheney

Which group contains the strongest competitor

[fayes-fics]

Lessons in Breeding

Lessons Masterpost PREV | NEXT

Pairings: Anthony Bridgerton x fem!reader, Benedict Bridgerton x fem!reader (threesome)

Summary: Fifth story in the Regency Lessons series and it's time-jump time. Things have progressed with our throuple and the Bridgerton Bros are in a race to impregnate their lady…

Warnings: 18+ smut, minors DNI, MMF threesome, BREEDING KINK off the bloody charts, pregnancy kink, dirty talk, oral sex (m to f), light bondage, filthy baby-making vaginal sex, dom/sub dynamics. Emotions, talk of marriages, established throuple dynamics.

Word Count: 5.4k

Authors Note: This is set in Lessons universe, but at least a year after the previous instalment. If pregnancy or babymaking isn't your thing, please don't read this. This is a very belated birthday request fill for @iboopedyournose. I hope you like the way I've interpreted your request for breeding kink threesome with bondage. Thanks to @colettebronte and @chaoticcalzoneranchsports for betaing. Enjoy! <3

You pause in front of the portrait of a naked pregnant woman, taking a sip of your champagne. The intimate parts of her are mostly obscured behind translucent silks. Her pregnant belly is bare as she cradles it proudly, her skin glowing; everything about her looks almost ethereal yet so earthy and powerful. It is such a provocative piece you can understand why it is only being shown at private parties such as this one, hosted by Mr Granville.

“Like what you see?” the dusky voice suddenly at your right ear asks.

You inhale sharply, instantly responding to the mere sound of his voice, something very Pavlovian in it. “Yes, I think she looks beautiful,” you reply quietly, tamping down your need to throw yourself into him, begging for his fingers in your mouth.

“She does indeed,” he is standing so close behind you can feel the heat radiating off him through his shirt. “Would you like to look like that? Swollen so beautifully with a baby?”

It's not something you have thought about much beyond the abstract idea that you wish for children someday. But then, so many things in your life are about to change, and this could be one.

“Maybe,” you deflect.

Large hands encircle your waist. “Mmm, just imagine,” he begins, his chest pressing warm on your spine. “How beautiful you would look, your belly all rounded,” his hands slide up and cup your chest as you moan lightly. “Your breasts so full, and oh gosh,” one hand slides down to the apex of your thighs, cradling it through your dress, “the smell and taste of you, so ripe, so juicy. You would be divine,” he assures.

“Stop,” you scold gently, but it's too breathy, the carnal images he so easily paints with his words haunting you as you rock in his arms.

“Would you like me to impregnate you, my darling?” he murmurs, his teeth pulling at your earlobe. “I could fuck you so hard and deep and leave my seed inside you. Over and over. And you know my brother would do the same in a heartbeat.”

Your breath quickens at the thought. They have always been careful to ensure they do not release inside you; it's a strict pact you have in place that they have always respected and obeyed. But perhaps that may change with what is impending.

“My husband-to-be, you mean,” your eyes cut sideways, and he stiffens.

“Yes, of course, I sometimes forget you are soon to be the Viscountess,” he bows his head, a flare of something in his eyes you know is jealousy.

“Benedict…” you sigh, sensing he needs reassurance; you pull him into a quiet alcove. “You know this is the only way the three of us can be together, for always. I love you just as much,” you vow quietly, touching his cheek. “But you know well I cannot marry you both, at least not in the eyes of the law. There would be many questions if Anthony were to remain unwed much longer. You know it is much easier for you to live with us as an apparent bachelor at Aubrey Hall than any other arrangement.”

All the facts you lay out, well known to you both, don’t stop the imploring look he gives you. 

“I will marry you symbolically in a ceremony in the woods, down by the lake,” you whisper, appealing to his bohemian romantic side. “I will wear your ring proudly, too,” you promise. “I am as much yours as I am his. And always will be. I cannot be without either of you.”

He beams and crowds into you, sliding his lips down your neck.

“And yes, I will bear your children, my love,” you sigh as his actions make you pliant in his hands, as they always do. You grab his face to ensure he meets your gaze, his eyes dancing. “Nothing would make me prouder than bearing both of your babies, so yes, my love, the answer is yes.”

You moan gently as he kisses fire across your skin, and your eyes drift back to the painting, the idea of being fertile, ripe, burgeoning with life somehow suddenly so alluring. 

——

“Anthony…” you call, but he does not respond; he probably cannot hear you above the whirlwind of activity around him. “ANTHONY!” you repeat, raising your voice, and suddenly, the hubbub of movement and noise in the room ceases.

His eyes meet yours and flash. “Everyone leave the room at once,” he orders to the hordes of people doing god knows what, “my fiancee wishes to speak with me.”

You watch as all the people scurry from the room as if burned.

“There was no need to send them away quite so abruptly, my love,” you state gently.

“Is this not an occasion where you wish me to throw you upon my desk and rut you so hard you scream?” he flirts outrageously.

“For once,” you respond airily, “it is not.”

“Tis a pity,” he smirks, then perches against the desk, crossing his legs and arms. “Then what can I do for you, my love?”

“I want you to make me with child,” you just go straight to the point. He usually appreciates bluntness.

He drops the heavy accounts ledger he is holding, and it slams to the ground with an echoing thump.

“Correction, I want you AND Benedict to make me with child,” you amend.

“What on earth brought this on?” his tone warm but intrigued, ignoring the ledger completely.

“That art party we went to last night?” you offer casually. “There was a scandalous but beautiful portrait of a pregnant naked woman.”

“Did he fuck you in front of it and give you some ideas?” Anthony sighs with fond exasperation.

“No,” you giggle, “for once, he did not.”

“But Tuesday is your night alone together?” Anthony frowns. “Don’t tell me he shirked his duty? I am his older brother. I can have words….”

“Oh, he more than performed his duty, just not in front of the painting,” you clarify.

“In front of one of his paintings, then?” Anthony guesses.

And you giggle again. “Carriage, on the way home.”

“Figures,” Anthony rolls his eyes, “does he ever do it in a bed?”

“Not if he can help it,” you wink, and he laughs.

Then schools his face more serious. “So you want a baby?”

“I want both of your babies. I’d certainly be open to us all getting some good practice in tomorrow,” you shrug playfully.

“I have absolutely no problem with that,” his voice drops low as he raises a sultry eyebrow. “And the desk offer still stands if you want a warm-up?” he concludes, breaking into a handsome smirk.

“It’s Wednesday, our rest day; I have dinner plans with my dear friend Lady Eleanor,” you shake your head fondly. “Plus, I cannot give you a head start, darling; that wouldn’t be fair to Benedict,” you tease. “You can sort it out between yourselves for tomorrow.”

“Why do we have a rest day?” he pouts.

“You know full well, with three people, it is much easier to schedule around six days. I can go one day without either of you, you know,” rolling your eyes lovingly.

“Such a pity,” he sighs in mock annoyance.

“It is just for today, darling, and tomorrow you may complete inside me, so there’s that to look forward to…” and you breeze out of the room, blowing him a kiss.

——

Thursday night is one of your two nights a week with both of your wonderful men. 

You spend the early evening bathing in luxury soaps with your favourite scents, readying yourself for a night of untold pleasures. Sometimes you all meet in the bedroom, sometimes in the blue room, and other times, like tonight, you agree to al fresco. You cannot wait to play by the lake under the mid-summer moonlight.

You slip on an ivory silk robe and nothing else except the lariat body chains they each gave you. Dainty gold chains with their initials that wrap around your waist, the A and B matching charms hanging low over your belly, grazing your thatch of hair below—a secret you wear every day unseen beneath your usual clothing.

It’s a balmy evening as you approach the water's edge. There is already a soft blanket laid out and a decanter of brandy with three glasses—Anthony has ensured the staff have prepared for the evening. But neither man is to be seen yet. You settle on the blanket and pour yourself a snifter, enjoying the gentle roar of oil lantern flames dancing in the breeze set out on surrounding stakes.

This evening will be a first, letting them both leave their seed within you. Even though you have been together as a threesome for more than a year and done countless wonderful sensual things together, this is a huge step towards something new. You don’t expect to get pregnant on this first attempt, but the idea is beguiling nonetheless.

You pull open your robe and massage your as-yet-empty belly. Running your hands in swirls, imagining what it might be like to watch it grow and swell with a child—the ability to bring life into the world something so elemental and heavenly all at once. To sustain life through the wonder of your body swirls in your mind as you untie your robe and grab your breasts. 

“I see someone started the party already, brother,” a familiar silky voice rings out, and your eyes pop open to see both of them standing there, watching you lasciviously. They are shirtless and only wear britches slung low around their hips, acres of lithe muscle and supple skin.

“Is that not our job, darling?” Anthony chimes in after his brother, already unbuttoning.

“Not that we aren’t enjoying the show,” Benedict adds pointedly, nudging Anthony as if to shut him up, and follows suit, removing his trousers.

When they both let their britches fall to the ground, you moan, seeing them both in all their resplendent naked glory, already half hard and looking so utterly delicious part of you wants to get on your knees and take them into your mouths. You go to crawl towards them, but Antony holds up a halting hand. 

“Stay right where you are, lay back; tonight is about your pleasure, darling,” he practically purrs. 

Your eyes flash with desire, and you do as told, removing your robe and laying back again, fully nude, running fingertips down the centre line of your torso, fingers playing with their jewelled charms that rest atop your lower belly.

“Then get down here,” you exhale, knowing their gaze is locked on your fingers as you slip them between your thighs.

They drop onto the blanket with you, the light breeze ruffling their chestnut locks. Both are so achingly beautiful with those strong Bridgerton genes. You can’t wait to bear a baby, babies, that look just like them.

They exchange a glance, and it’s their shorthand again—where they silently communicate how they will destroy you masterfully moment by moment. Benedict surges up and captures your lips in a passionate all-consuming kiss as Anthony slips between your legs, pulling your hand away and throwing your feet over his shoulders. Forcing your legs out wide, he laps a determined, deep plough of tongue all the way from the base of your slit up to your pulsing clit. It has you calling loudly into his brother's mouth.

“You taste fertile, my darling wife-to-be,” Anthony groans lewdly and pointedly, and you can’t help but giggle across Benedict’s lips. 

“I am certain he is right,” Benedict smiles affectionately, swallowing your noises. “I swear I can smell the difference when you are ripe for us. Your scent is just a little headier, muskier; it makes my cock even harder than normal,” he ponders, kissing across your face as he utters his trademark filth. He knows just a few choice words can have you ready for him—every single damn time. 

Anthony’s hand strays up to play with your belly charms as his tongue unfurls its magic. It doesn’t matter that you are with these two men, individually and together, multiple times a week; they never fail to arouse you to the point of aching with just a few expertly deployed moves. Their tongues, whether talking dirty or teasing your body, are your favourite part of them. Benedict shuffles lower and sucks one of your nipples into his mouth. Oh god, yes, it’s definitely their tongues. 

“Darling, are we playing tonight, or are we just us?” Benedict asks, looking up from your chest with gentle eyes. Sometimes you like to play with your power dynamic and use your titles, other times since you have grown closer, you are just yourselves, no masks, no games, just you, Ant and Ben, your affectionate shortened names for them.

You stop Anthony’s ministrations between your legs with a tap on his shoulder, wanting his full attention on this question that Benedict poses.

“What would you prefer, my loves?” You ask them, ruffling Benedict's hair, enjoying the feel of its thickness running between your fingers and squeezing Anthony’s shoulder lovingly.

“I want to be Ben, just your husband-to-be,” Benedict says quietly, and you can’t help the little smile that breaks out. “This is where we will get married,” he asserts, looking around, “under the stars, just like this.”

“Yes, my darling,” you confirm happily, “I want that.”

“How about you, Ant, my love? Would you like to be you, or perhaps my lord or my beautiful boy?” you inquire.

“I want to be Ant, your fiancé,” he nods in agreement with Benedict’s idea. “Tonight, my darling wife-to-be, the only lesson is how to breed you like the wondrous Bridgerton you are about to become.”

“Breed me?” You inhale, wanting to be insulted by the term but finding it makes your clit burn hot.

“Oh yes,” Benedict chimes in, “we are going to breed you, darling. You will sire a whole house of Bridgertons. You will never be without our seed—it will be dripping from you every day.”

“Ben,” you stutter, grabbing his bicep as your whole cunt is suddenly slick and pulsing at his crude language. “Tell me more.” 

His responding grin is predatory as Anthony chuckles and slinks back between your legs.

“Do you know how many bedrooms there are in Aubrey Hall?” Benedict’s voice is a gentle tease as his nose runs teasing patterns over the swell of your breast.

“I don’t,” you admit, honestly.

“Twenty-four,” Anthony answers for you from between your thighs as he sucks a line down from your inner knee.

“Even with all of our siblings and their future children visiting, that still leaves at least, hmm, twelve bedrooms just going to waste. Until we fill them with our little brood.” 

“Benedict, I am not birthing twelve children,” you gasp, half in shock at the very thought, half because Anthony’s tongue curls rough around your clit. 

“Maybe not,” he admits, kissing across to your other breast, “but I think we should at least try….”

“Six each, brother?” Anthony chuckles, joining in,  lifting his head and resting his chin on your pubic hair, shooting a killer smile.

“Get back there. Have you not heard that female pleasure aids conception?” you challenge, raising an eyebrow.

“Then we will have to make you come at least twice tonight; ‘tis the most prudent path to double our chances,” Anthony retorts with a wink sinking down with a devilish look on his face before his tongue makes you cry out, and Benedict's teeth graze over your nipple, making you cant up into his mouth.

“You’ll have to carry me all the way back to the house if I have many more than that, remember,” you warn, bemused.

“Darling, I would carry you to the ends of the earth and back,” Benedict pledges, the romantic poetry just pouring from him as he surges up and kisses your lips, plundering your mouth with his tongue. “You have bewitched me. Since that very first day in my brother's study, I have been yours.”

Benedict is always more emotional and partial to declarations of love than his brother, whose feelings run just as deep but does not effuse about it so openly—preferring to express his adoration privately and through beautiful, thoughtful gifts.

“Save it for your individual days, brother,” Anthony hums drolly over your flesh. “We have a very special job to do tonight.”

“Indeed we do,” Benedict concurs, picking up one of your hands and entwining your fingers with his.

Then their efforts become more focussed as Anthony sucks your engorged nub deep into his mouth, moans vibrating your sensitive bud as Benedict bites your nipple in just that way you like—an insistent suckling hold that pulls your skin taunt and is a line right down to your throbbing clit being so utterly wrecked by Anthony.

It always stuns you how quickly these two, working in tandem, can rocket you so high, so dizzyingly fast. You are vaguely aware your hands are in both of their hair as you climb so high. Eyes screwed shut as they both mouth filthy encouragements into your skin.

“Come on, darling,” Anthony pleads, “I want to feel you drench my face.”

“Do not stop,” you chant repeatedly, twisting luscious strands of chestnut locks around your fingers.

Benedict’s lips are hot on your ear, biting the lobe as he senses you are so close. “Break for him,” he breathes, “come on, my love, give him that sweet nectar to drink.” 

The filthy poet never fails to give you that extra nudge, and sure enough, with a staccato of breaths, they have to hold you down as you fight to buck against the convulsions deep inside.

Anthony growls at you to stay still, even though you know he loves it when you writhe over his face, his jaw clamped hard between your spasming thighs.

“Does that feel so good?” Benedict’s silky voice vibrates your ear.

“Yes, oh god, I need one of you inside me, please,” you twist to look into his face as beseeching as you can, still flushed and mindless from your orgasm. “But please tie my hands first,” you stutter breathlessly, offering your wrists up to him, pressed together. “Above my head.”

“I thought we were not playing tonight?” Anthony says quietly as he lands on the blanket beside you, his face shining with your juices.

“Please, just, please,” you beg, turning to him, “I need it. Use your chains.”

As they flank your body, both of them make a low noise at the idea of binding your hands with your golden chains that bear their initials. 

Benedict’s large hand slides down your dewy torso and into your thatch of hair. Then slowly, while you pant lightly and keep your eyes locked on Anthony’s intense stare, Benefict unhooks one chain and tugs it gently from around the dip of your waist.

“Your turn,” he says quietly to Anthony, and you realise they are removing their own chains. Somehow that choice makes you burn even hotter for them, squirming slightly. 

Anthony’s hand follows the same path as you breath heavy and hold Benedict’s gaze this time as Anthony unhooks the chain with the A charm and drags it up along your skin, a corner of the letter scraping gently over your flesh, catching your nipple as you gasp.

Then they take an arm each, raising them above your head. Both then bind your wrists as your gaze flits between them, watching their handsome faces.

“Thank you,” your murmur reverential, testing the hold and feeling the precious metal bite into your flesh as they both dive in for a heated kiss, Anthony reaching you first and Benedict settling on your neck until they can swap positions. It’s a deep kiss that is musky and sweet with the taste and scent of your climax.

“Who gets the privilege of being first, my love?” Benedict asks silkily.

“You do, Ben,” you whisper, and his whole face lights up. So often used to being second.

You turn to Anthony as Benedict shifts to lay between your legs. “Thank you, my darling Ant, for my wonderful orgasm,” you compliment and watch as his face turns boyish with pride.

You cry out as Benedict spears into you, splitting your open, causing the gentle ripples of your orgasm to flare again, and he drops his head onto your breastbone.

“Christ, there is nothing like your little fluttering cunt is there?” he groans into your flesh.

“Give it to me, Ben,” you twist from kissing Anthony to declare. Then turn back, desperate for more hot kisses.

His tip feels somehow harsher than normal, a hot spike as he begins to move, your walls clinging to him almost vice-like. It feels so good your eyes roll, and your mouth goes slack against Anthony’s. 

He brushes a gentle hand through your hair, watching you through hooded eyes, gently murmuring praise and compliments as you take Benedict's hard thrusts.

“We will plant our seeds, darling, deep in here,” Anthony breathes, a hand sliding down to your belly just above where Benedict’s body meets yours as he surges into you. “Do you want that?”

“Yess,” you hiss, mesmerised, fingers twirling in your own hair, “please.”

“Oh, our perfect little broodmare,” Anthony exhales shakily, surging his leaking cock against the hip he holds open for his little brother, who now curls down over you, biting a nipple. “Do you know how proud we will be? Making your beautiful body swell, your breasts growing so large and sensitive, your belly growing round. With our baby. A little Bridgerton. Or maybe more. We want to plant you with two babies right now, one for me and one for my little brother. Can you do that, darling, for us? Take our seed so good?”

“Yes, Anthony,” you pant, utterly enthralled by his filthy talk. That is usually the expertise of the man now biting your nipples and growling as he fucks you so harshly that your body jerks on the cotton blanket you lay on.

“Let him,” Anthony continues with slightly gritted teeth, “let him fuck you harder than he ever has before.”

“Yes, my lord,” you answer, under his spell, and his nostrils flare as you use the title you call him in play.

He curses, then grabs one of your chain-bound wrists above your head, fingers sliding possessively between yours and forcing the back of your hand down onto the ground. 

“Yes, that's it, do as you are told, little one,” he growls through clenched teeth. 

And you feel a frisson of something frantic, like you all need something with a little edge. A gust of breeze flutters over your skin and leaves quiver on the trees around you. 

“Fuck her harder, brother,” Anthony orders into your clavicle, and you feel it buzz into your bones.

Benedict growls in response and hooks the leg, not being held by Anthony over his flexed forearm. Pulling you open more, feeling so vulnerable, your hands bound, your legs held obscenely wide open by each. 

Suddenly the moment feels charged as Benedict snaps his hips so forcefully that you whimper on every stroke, revelling in the sweat splashing from his damp forehead curls onto your breasts. Anthony is sucking on your neck with almost painful intensity as Benedict drops down and bites your flesh over your tricep, making you writhe and call his name. The gold chains binding your wrists dig into your flesh as you move, bringing an edge that just pushes you higher.

You encourage him, calling him sir, begging for more, squeezing his cock with your pelvic muscles as he pounds into you mercilessly. And that constriction is the catalyst he needs. He curses long and low, feeling huge as he spears so deep he nudges your hilt, and you sense a change in him that usually signals his withdrawal. This time his eyes fly open, pupils blown, and expression wild as he grabs your jaw firmly.

“Are you ready?” He barks possessively. 

“Yes,” you hiss, realising he is going to climax without waiting for you.

His last few hot desperate thrusts are so harsh your whole insides feel rearranged. Then he stills, and for the first time, you hear that guttural groan right into your ear as he begins to spill inside you, a hot wave that blooms deep inside, feeling like so much more than he has ever come before. It’s a new sensation and feels just wonderful.

“Yes, take it all, my darling girl,” he shudders, and that gravelly tone pulls you over a small edge, you clamping down on his spurting cock as he groans and spasms into you some more, hipbones digging into your inner thighs. His weight is almost crushing as he becomes motionless, your thighs burning from the stretch.

“That’s it,” Anthony whispers against your temple, “lay still and open, darling, let his seed into your womb.” 

Those words echo drowsily in your head as you feel Benedict’s cock gradually soften inside you, and he slips out slowly with a slick tide of juices that run down over your bottom cheeks.

“Fucking babies into you is my new favourite thing. Do you have any idea how exquisite it is to come inside you? Fill you up? I never want to come anywhere else ever again.” Benedict gusts as he falls to one side of you, still breathing heavily, and you realise it's a novel experience for him too. “God, I love you,” he admits shakily, landing a kiss on your cheek.

“I love you too. Thank you for my baby Benedict,” you nuzzle his face and kiss him sweetly as his body relaxes, utterly spent.

You twist to look at Anthony, and his eyes sparkle as he climbs between your legs, his cock hard, glistening, and leaking in his fist. “Are you ready?” 

“Yes, my lord,” you answer.

He thrusts into your soaking cunt, still leaking profusely from Benedict. He feels even larger and harsher somehow too, and on reflex, you clench around the invasion, feeling the verdant earth beneath your bottom and shoulder blades softened slightly by the blanket.

“My darling girl,” his voice ragged, broken. “You are so exquisitely puffy and swollen. That was quite the mounting you got, wasn’t it? Are you ready for more?”

You croak your assent, and then he begins to move. He isn’t slow. In fact, he starts pounding so hard you gasp, the sensation almost too much, and Benedict's hand slides into your hair, over your bound hands, and you clutch it as he rolls closer, nuzzling your face.

“Feel it all, my darling girl,” Benedict rumbles.

“I am, sir,” you nod and bite your lip. “I can even feel your seed inside me still,” you add with a moan, the chains on your wrist abraiding your skin, leaving marks.

“Good,” he gusts drowsily and warmly in your ear, a hand swirling patterns on your hip. “Let it in, darling, all the way in.”

As a cloud clears the moon, the atmosphere feels softer again, the frantic moment of before ebbing into something more profound; even as Anthony takes you hard, it’s more in an undulating wave, hitting your hilt with a rhythm that feels hypnotic, your cunt clinging to him like a glove, as Benedict's sonorous voice is back at your ear.

“That’s right, get ready, darling girl. We need you to keep this line going. In your belly, you will grow the next viscount. You will bare the heirs of this family. Just you, my wonderful wife-to-be.”

“I want all of your babies too, Benedict,” you breathe as Anthony ploughs on. “I want to give the world more like you. Talented creative, empathetic, loving souls who bring joy to every room.”

His eyes mist over as you declare your truth. “I love you so much it hurts,” he murmurs into your cheek, voice thick with emotion.

“I love you too,” you want to grab his face but can’t; instead, you seal your pact with a sweet, almost chaste kiss filled with affection; even as Anthony takes you towards a big blissful moment, you hope you will hit together.

“Now declare your love to him too,” Benedict orders softly, “you know he needs to hear it, maybe even more than me.”

You nod and turn all of your attention and heart to the Viscount. Still holding Benedict’s hand tangled in your hair, not wanting either to feel left out on this momentous night.

“Viscount Anthony Bridgerton,” you use his title and full name, your pleading tone making his eyes bore into yours. “I love you so much, my lord, my husband,” you state categorically.

He groans and falls over your body, covering you, his scent and heat all-encompassing.

“Darling darling wife, my Viscountess,” he exhales over your lips, his thrusts turning slow and languid, his hands grasping your thighs and pulling your legs up and out, utterly under his command, pinned. “I love you so much,” he sounds almost choked with emotion, and part of you wishes you had your hands to hold him to you.

“Do you want to be freed, my love?” Benedict asks softly, always seemingly able to intuit your needs before you even articulate them.

“Please,” you request, turning to give him a grateful peck as he reaches up and loosens both chains, leaving one delicately but loosely wrapped around each forearm, your wrists pulsing mildly as they are freed.

Instantly you move your arms, wrapping one around Anthony’s back, your nails and the gold chain scraping down his skin as your other hand rounds Benedict's shoulder and into his hair, stroking and petting.

Your hand sliding down, mapping his contours, over the swell of his muscular bottom makes Anthony groan and bite your neck, spearing deep into you as your nails dig in, tilting your pelvis and rocking him deeper into you until you feel that ache so far inside. 

Then he pushes up onto his hands and thrusts hard, setting a punishing pace. Every fibre of your being wants this, ratcheting high and fast as each stroke crushes your clit into your frame. Unable to form words except to curse and babble mindlessly. You feel your whole body tense, a release so imminent you grit your teeth and chase it hard.

“That’s it darling, come for me, milk me,” Antony commands, flicking a thumb over your clit, and you are gone.

Yelling and screaming as his cock is the solid mass you convulse around, your entire being spasming, and you feel Benedict’s firm grip, holding you down with a knee and large hands. Making you orgasm hard, entirely still, unable to writhe, all the sensation concentrated on where Anthony’s cock spears you open.

As the blood rushes in your ears, his teeth are biting on the cord of your neck, and with a few pumps, he releases with a throaty whine, pushing the deepest he has ever been, feeling like he piercing through your hilt.

He curses long, low guttural and again there is that bloom of viscous heat inside as he spills all his seed.

“Yes, my darling girl,” he slurs, “stay down, take it all,”

You cry out, and your instinct is to move, but both of them hold you down, so your fingers dig into flesh, and your toes curl as your body is thwarted from its shakes and shudders. Anthony’s weight is upon you as he recovers his breath, feeling even heavier than Benedict as he slumps,, panting into your neck.

“I understand what you mean now, brother,” his tone almost wonderous. “I do not wish to leave my seed anywhere else either, dear god; that was exquisite.” Delicately he pulls backwards so his softening cock slips out of your body, and you groan at the sensation, flopping your head blissfully on the blanket as he falls to your other side. 

The gentle sounds of nocturnal nature around you fill your ears as it is just your joint breathing, soothing hands running over you, soft kisses and little intimate moments where you whisper to both of your boys.

“We may have made a baby tonight, my darling husbands,” you murmur.

The look they both give you is brimming with love and appreciation as you curl into both, taking a hand from each of them and placing them over your heart as you drift to sleep, cocooned in their safe embrace.

Your boys. Forever, your boys.

Anthony & Benedict taglists: @makaylan @foreverlonginguniverse @iboopedyournose @colettebronte @aintnuthinbutahounddog @severewobblerlightdragon @margofiore @writergirl-2001 @heeyyyou @enichole445 @enchantedbytomandhenry @ambitionspassionscoffee @chaoticcalzoneranchsports @nikaprincessofkattegat @baebee35 @crowleysqueenofhell @bridgertontess @queenofmean14 @fiction-is-life @lilacbeesworld @angels17324 @broooookiecrisp @queen-of-the-misfit-toys @eleanor-bradstreet @divaanya @musicismyoxygen84 @benedictspaintbrush @miindfucked @sorryallonsy @lilithseve @cayt0123 @hottytoddyhistory @elizah99 @truly-dionysus @fictionalmenloversblog @debheart @zinzysstuff @malpalgalz @amanda08319 @panhoeofmanyfandoms

[companion-showdown]

Who had the worst time aboard the TARDIS?

ROUND 0 MASTERPOST

[noirandchocolate]

Discworld Fight Club 2023 Masterpost

Welcome to the biggest rumble the Disc has ever seen! Thrill as some of the turtle's premier brawlers, assassins, vampires, magic users, and tricksters face off in a five-round tournament to see who's the best of the best!

But first, please read the Rules:

Remember to vote based on who you think would win in a fight, not necessarily who is your favorite character. This is a tournament, not a popularity contest!

These fighters are good guys and shouldn't really bear any real animus toward each other, so consider this a more or less friendly event where no one is literally trying to murder anyone. So, when considering what weapons and techniques a character might use, think more in terms of how they'd incapacitate one another. That might involve using weaponry of course, but like, maybe Detritus shouldn't have access to the Piecemaker, is the kind of thing I mean, ha.

A contestant can win by knocking their opponent out, making them 'say uncle' so to speak, or even tricking them somehow! Think about the characters' strengths beyond, well, physical strength!

Successfully running away counts as a victory for the runner, not as a default win for the contestant left behind.

Reblogging and replying to the polls, especially with commentary on your reasoning for your vote, would be super fun and I hope a lot of people will do that! I tried to seed the bracket so the matchups are interesting, and I think there's some room for debate on a lot of them even at the start. Have fun!

So without further ado, let's have Discworld Fight Club 2023!

This will be updated as the rounds progress, with links to each poll. Winners on each match are in bold.

Round 1:

Part A-- Match 1: Commander Samuel Vimes vs. Maladict Match 2: Moist von Lipwig vs. Dr. Whiteface Match 3: Ghenghiz Cohen vs. Reg Shoe Match 4: Mrs. Erzulie Gogol vs. Rob Anybody Feegle Match 5: Detritus vs. the Dean of Pentacles Match 6: Esmerelda "Granny" Weatherwax vs. Susan Sto Helit Match 7: Mr. Nutt vs. Harry King Match 8: The Librarian vs. Queen Magrat Garlick

Part B--

Match 1: Lord Havelock Vetinari vs. Willikins Match 2: Adora Belle Dearheart vs. Mr. Pump Match 3: Gytha "Nanny" Ogg vs. Sergeant Cheery Littlebottom Match 4: Lu-Tze vs. Otto Chriek Match 5: Archchancellor Mustrum Ridcully vs. Polly Perks Match 6: Jason Ogg vs. Captain Carrot Ironfoundersson Match 7: Sergeant Angua von Uberwald vs. Rincewind Match 8: Agnes "Perdita X Dream" Nitt vs. Sergeant Jack Jackrum

Round 2:

Match 1: Commander Samuel Vimes vs. Moist von Lipwig Match 2: Ghenghiz Cohen the Barbarian vs. Rob Anybody Feegle Match 3: Esmerelda "Granny" Weatherwax vs. Detritus Match 4: Mr. Nutt vs. the Librarian Match 5: Lord Havelock Vetinari vs. Adora Belle Dearheart Match 6: Gytha "Nanny" Ogg vs. Lu-Tze Match 7: Archancellor Mustrum Ridcully vs. Captain Carrot Ironfoundersson Match 8: Sergeant Angua von Uberwald vs. Sergeant Jack Jackrum

Round 3:

Match 1: Commander Samuel Vimes vs. Rob Anybody Feegle Match 2: Esmerelda "Granny" Weatherwax vs. the Librarian Match 3: Lord Havelock Vetinari vs. Gytha "Nanny" Ogg Match 4: Captain Carrot Ironfoundersson vs. Sergeant Angua von Uberwald

Round 4:

Match 1: Commander Samuel Vimes vs. Esmerelda "Granny" Weatherwax Match 2: Gytha "Nanny" Ogg vs. Sergeant Angua von Uberwald

Round 5:

Final: Esmerelda "Granny" Weatherwax vs. Gytha "Nanny" Ogg

Granny Weatherwax has taken the title!! Thanks for participating, everyone! It's been a really fun week of battles, just as I'd hoped! And it's all thanks to you guys, for voting and commenting some pretty insightful and funny stuff! I definitely encourage everybody to go into the match links above and check out the notes if they haven't been doing so all along.

And thus ends Discworld Fight Club 2023!

[goodgirlofglory]

In the balance - Chapter 8: Ragged depths

Chapter 7

/Masterpost/

Pairing: Dark!Steve Rogers x reader

Word count: 5,2k

Warnings: non-con (series), dub-con (series), explicit sexual content, explicit descriptions of blood, graphic descriptions of violence and death, like gnarly stuff (at least as gnarly as I've ever written), smut, oral (f recieving), vaginal sex, unprotected sex, pregnancy kink, breeding kink, daddy kink.

Summary: Lost in an endless, repetitive dream of luxury and pleasure in Steve's arms, finally accepting of your fate and the pregnancy you can no longer hope to terminate, you think all is safe and well - until strangers appear in the middle of the night. Though these strangers ignite fear in you, witnessing the way Steve deposes of them might be what ignites true fear in you...

Note: WOOOO CHILD, finally got around to finishing this chapter. Sorry for the wait and thank you for the patience from those of you still following this series and asking for updates. Love you🫶

A special thanks to this ask that inspired this chapter. Really, I just took dear anons idead and ran with it😘😘

This shit it DARK! Your media consumption is your own responsibility, but I advise you not to interact if the content of the warnings upset you!

Minors DO NOT INTERACT!!!!!!!!🚫

Reblogs, likes, replies and asks are amazing🦋

“That’s it, baby, squeeze my cock just like that,” Steve groaned as he pounded into you from behind. You could barely manage a gasping intake of breath as his cock hit that spot inside you dead-on and you arched your back on instinct, trying to get him deeper. Steve groaned approvingly, gripping your hips tighter as he speared you harder. 

It was the third time that day, this time bent over the kitchen table. It had only taken a look and the grazing of your fingers as Steve handed you your tea. Next thing you knew, your panties were down around your ankles, your dress hiked up over your head and you were being fucked within an inch of your life, completely naked, bent over the table. The cool air from the open patio door sent goosebumps over your exposed skin, and the obscene slick between your legs squelched in between Steve’s grunts and your gasping moans. Steve had his pants down around his ankles, and he was bent over you, mouthing aggressively at your neck. 

You whined as another pounding wave of pleasure rippled through you, threatening to take your knees out. Steve’s hands wound around to your rounded belly, stroking over the bump and groaning against the nape of your neck, pushing his face into your hair and taking in greedy gulps of your air, and you flushed at the aggressive way he was smelling you, your hormones no doubt driving his frenzy higher.

“You’re so gorgeous like this, all round and heavy with my baby” he growled, and the ownership in his voice made you keen. “Walking around like this, letting me see just how much you’ve grown from my seed inside you,” Steve said, nibbling on your ear and the skin below it in a proprietary way. You flushed hot from the top of your head down to your toes, trying to hide your rapidly heating face, the way his praise washed over you like silk, making you thrust your hips back to meet his pelvis. 

“Mmm, did you like the sound of that, baby?” Steve teased, smiling against the clammy skin of your neck, hands coming up to cup your bouncing breasts, teasing the puffy nipples and you wailed, completely beyond words. “Did you?” Steve asked again, slowing his hips down just a tad despite your sound of protest. “Answer me, sugar,” he said sternly, pinching your nipples between thumb and forefinger and your pussy throbbed, a sign you were spiraling towards the edge despite Steve slowing his thrusts. His words whirled around in your mind along with the hormonal arousal constantly begging for release and the way his warm skin felt on yours, the primal position of your fucking, the guttural sounds he made as his hands ran over your pregnant belly while his cock, hard as a rod, pounded into your yielding, wet flesh.His cock was so hard, and you knew you were dripping to the floor. 

Flushing even more profusely, you could only manage a nod, your mouth opening to desperately pull in air. Steve kissed your cheek with an open mouth, messily, moaning approvingly, but he didn’t speed up his thrusts again, and you were about to go insane, your body tense and shivering. 

“I need your words, honey, do you have a few words for daddy?” he asked, sickly sweet as one of his hands moved down to lightly graze your swollen and pulsing clit. You nearly lost your footing again, knees shaking as he teased your clit with his fingertips, hips moving steadily, jolting you forward before you moved back to meet his thrusts, mindlessly seeking more friction to bring you over the edge. Your head was completely empty of coherent thought and he knew it. 

He fucking loved when you got like this, it reminded him of those first times in your apartment, when you’d gone from a shy, terrified little bunny to a drooling, wet, empty-headed, cum-hungry whore just from his cock and words alone. 

He grazed your clit with his fingertips again and you shouted, head hanging low in your embarrassment. “Yes! I l-liked it,” you practically wailed to the floor. Steve cooed appreciatively, voice laced with the tiniest amount of degradation, but didn’t speed up his thrusts and you wanted to throw something.

“Yes what, baby?” he asked pointedly, the hand not teasing your clit to insanity coming up to turn your head up and back to catch his eyes. 

You moaned, feeling the weight of your belly shift with his thrusts, his fingers holding your pleasure so neatly just beyond your reach as they ghosted over your nub, his eyes demanding you lay your soul bare for him, give yourself completely over to his will. 

“Yes, daddy,” you whispered, tears springing to your eyes at the way rolling shivers of pleasure rippled through you at saying those words, at being made to say those words, to him, while he held your gaze with his stare. 

He growled, eyes holding yours in a tight grip as his hips finally picked up speed, rapidly increasing to the pounding he did before, slamming against that spot inside you you could never reach yourself. 

“Good girl,” he growled, his fingers pressing to your clit, rubbing fast circles and you whined in almost alarm at the pace of which your orgasm welled up inside you. Your whole body tensed up, pussy squeezing Steve’s cock to the point of pain and he gasped. Your orgasm exploded inside you, pulling Steve right over the edge with you. 

“Fuck, just like that. Here it comes, baby,” he gritted out and then you felt the hot flush of his cum shooting inside you, his cock pulsing unevenly as he fucked himself through it, never slowing down. You knew what he was aiming at. 

Completely unable to stop him or yourself, your belly and the weight of both yourself and him pushing down and the way his cock kept ramming you in your post-orgasm sensitivity had you wailing as another string snapped. You squirted, a huge gush that exploded from you and coated both your thighs and Steve’s before splattering to the floor. 

Your body convulsed, only held up by Steve’s strong arms as your mind short-circuited from the pleasure, eyes glued to the sight of your juices wetting the floor below you. 

Something had changed in Steve since that first time he fed from you and fucked you at the same time, a tether snapping. He no longer even tried to control his desire, his demand for your body, your mind, your entire being. He was, in a word, unhinged. His hands practically never left you, always stroking, groping, gripping, rubbing, smacking your ass lightly and pinching your seemingly perpetually peaked and sensitive nipples playfully, smirking like a cat at the way you shivered. The touches would range from light, reverend grazes, like he just needed to reassure himself you were there, and possessive, tight squeezes, like he couldn’t handle not being inside you a moment longer. He usually didn’t wait long before pushing your dress up, tugging your panties off or just to the side and sheathing himself inside you with a brutish grunt. You, in turn, were so swollen and aching and needy - you couldn’t stop him even if you wanted to. You needed him, needed his cock, needed him to push you against the nearest surface, keep you there while he took the edge off for the both of you - until your hormones sent the both of you into a frenzy again. 

Later in the evening, Steve had you riding him on the couch. It had started as a lower back massage, but they rarely stayed that way nowadays. Steve was as insatiable as you, and along those first times, your enthusiasm had loosened his tongue. Now he couldn’t seem to keep his praise in, making you flush hot or preen or go all shy from the filth that spewed from him. 

“Yes, that’s it baby, ride that cock, take what’s yours. You want my cum, baby? Want to milk my cock while I milk you?” he asked on a gasp as you bounced on him as good as you could with your belly rounded, still shiny from the oil he’d rubbbed into it earlier. He bent forward and took one of your leaking nipples into his mouth, his cock throbbing inside you as he fed from you while looking up into your eyes through his thick, long lashes. 

“Fuck,” you gasped as he groaned, the vibrations going through your tender flesh, and sweat covered your brow as you spasmed on his cock, pussy helplessly clamping down. Steve gasped away from your breast, your milk leaking out and soaking his beard as he bent up to kiss you with a mouthful of milk. He seemed to like feeding it back to you, making out while the sweet taste of it lingered between you, completely obliterating any line of decency, sending you head first into heady depravity in that same possessive way he’d always done.

“Here it comes, baby, make sure to keep it all in for daddy,” Steve murmured against your lips before he came, and you were helpless against the lewdness of the new nickname he’d given himself, and how much you secretly liked it. You came with a cry along with him, his thumbs slowly teasing your sensitive nipples, just lingering there, covered in white milk. 

You were floating on the heady cloud of pleasure Steve kept around you at all times. Really, you had nothing else to do all day but wait for your pregnancy to advance, and you both seemed content to just fuck all day, every day. You wondered if Steve missed his job, missed the outside world. You didn’t, had stopped longing for it once Steve had made you see that the only safe thing to do was to be with him. You had everything you needed with him, anything you could want for. Steve loved and took care of you, the mansion provided every piece of food, clothing and entertainment you could wish for. Honestly, if there was anything you were desperate for, it was not to go back to those early days where all you’d been was obsessive, desperate and miserable. Once you saw the only path away from that was with Steve, you’d accepted it, and then the fog of pleasure he’d thrust upon you had wiped out any resistance. 

Steve fucked you everywhere. Under the trees in the garden, mouthing his way down your chest, taking each nipple into his mouth and laving them in generous licks before kissing his way down your rounded belly, stroking it tenderly while kissing it over and over like he just couldn’t believe it was there. It was heady and intense, this obsession with your bump, and you almost felt overwhelmed by it, by the magnitude of his devotion, by how proud and primal it made him. Steve feasted on you. He groaned against your flesh, alternating between sucks and small, teasing licks until you came on his tongue before slipping his cock inside while you were still spasming, a possessive hand on your belly as he rutted deep inside you. 

He fucked you in the shower, joining you in the morning and teasing you to delirium, tweaking your nipples until they were tender and erect, rutting his cock against your lower back until you bucked back against him, slipped a finger down to tease your ass as he thrust into your weeping cunt, drawing orgasm after orgasm from you while whispering filthy nothings into your sensitive ear and made you call him daddy.

You’d catch him watching you with darkened eyes as you waddled along, a hand on your aching lower back, and you’d be all too aware of his keen eyes as you carefully lowered yourself into a chair or the sofa with a groan. Seeing your body changing to adapt to your growing belly seemed to ignite this primal hunger in him, and his hungry stare would in turn ignite shivers on your skin, your own arousal awakening to meet his. He’d ambush you in the hall and go down on you while you leaned against the wall, your moans echoing into the grand staircase. 

“So wet for me, doll. Are you this wet for me?” he’d ask, hot breath gusting over your clit, and all you could do was nod, tugging on his hair to bring his face back to your puffy pussy. 

You welcomed it all. Craved it all. Spent less and less time in clothing, spent more time initiating touches with him. A hand on his chest as you passed him in the kitchen, a brush of fingers over his as you passed him your empty teacup, a deliberate press of your toes against his bulge as he massaged your feet. Anything to incite the desire that welled inside him like a feral tidal wave. Giggling when he gave you that downright hungry gaze before pouncing on you, pressing you into the cushions as much as was comfortable for your bump before peppering your neck with kisses, groaning what a tempting little siren you were.

You didn’t know how much time passed like that - in this pleasure limbo with Steve, where all you did was fuck, eat, sleep and occasionally monitor your pregnancy symptoms. You had one more appointment with Dr. Banner in the clinical office set up in the basement, where he declared you healthy and stable like before. Steve preened and squeezed your hand, all proud and pleased, his other hand stroking lovingly on your bump. Your bloodwork came back with interesting results too, but you understood none of it. Steve reassured you all you needed to know was that everything looked fine - better than fine. You were in tip-top shape and the baby was strong and healthy. 

You’d grown to like stroking your bump yourself now, your hand going there of its own accord. It was hard not to get fond of it with the way Steve doted on it, the way he loved you for it, so sweet and reverent, nothing like the harsh and dominating way he’d sometimes been in the past. There hadn’t been any movement in your belly yet, but you trusted it would come soon, a part of you hoping Steve would be there when you first felt that kick. A part of you started to wonder just what life would be like once the child was born. 

Life in the mansion mellowed out to a hazy, pleasure-filled dream, the days melting together even as you passed your seven months milestone of the pregnancy. It hit you that even if you gave birth now, the child would probably survive. When you’d told Steve he’d kissed you soundly, grinning from ear to ear while telling you it’d probably survived a lot earlier than this, considering it was his baby. You found yourself swatting his arm reproachfully for his cockiness, but couldn’t contain your smile as he laughed and insinuated his face into the crook of your neck to kiss your skin, pulling you closer to him so your bump was firmly pressed against his chiseled torso, warm and snug. 

Though Steve was adamant you get enough sleep, you would sometimes find yourself awakening in the middle of the night to him kissing down your body, hungry and heady. You never complained, you were so fucking horny all the time it didn’t take long before you were keening needily for him, writhing on the sheets as he licked and sucked at your pussy. Tonight was one of those nights, and the moonlight cast a silvery blue light on the calm bedroom as Steve kissed over your bump, broad hands lifting it, helping you turn to lay on your back so he could get in between your thighs. You sighed, arousal welling up like a wave inside you, slow and sluggish and pulsing languidly as he pressed his face to your mound and started licking your clit teasingly. 

Breathy sounds escaped you as you lay there, half-asleep still, riding the pleasant sensations coursing along in your veins. Time slipped away from you in these dreamlike hours, and you were getting into it, moving your hips as much as you could to help create friction on your needy parts when Steve’s head unexpectedly and abruptly disappeared from your wet cunt. Thinking he was teasing you, you lifted your hips in search of his mouth when his hand on your hips stilled you, hard and urgent.

A ping of alarm set off in the back of your mind, and you opened your eyes to peer down. Steve was on his knees in the bed, head turned towards the open doors to the bedroom, so still it was almost like he was a statue. Something was off.

“Ste-” you started to ask, but was cut off by him turning his head and lifting a finger to press to his lips, eye stark and wide in the silence of the night. You could hear nothing but your own breathing. 

Steve crawled up the bed to speak close to your ear, and you were astonished by the fact that he made no sound whatsoever, his limbs in the sheets didn’t even seem to make any noise. Distant questions of Steve’s profession whispered in the far expanses of your mind, questions you hadn’t pondered in months. 

“Stay here, don’t make a sound, I’ll be right back,” he whispered in your ear. You nodded, a kernel of fear catching on fire in your chest. It wasn’t like you could run very well in this condition. You remembered that first night he’d appeared in your apartment, the wound on his shoulder, how he said he’d gotten it from some man with a sword. 

Steve got out of the bed, only clad in a pair of gray boxer shorts and padded on soundless, bare feet to the door, peered subtly out into the hallway and then disappeared. 

Your heart was a rapidly growing thump in your chest and you lay as frozen as you could, listening and listening, straining to hear even a single thing in the dead silent night. 

Then the sound of an explosion sounded from the far side of the mansion, and all at once, the sound of shouts, gunshots, wood breaking and glass shattering filled the air. The blood in your veins turned to ice as sudden, unexpected fear spread in your body. It was happening on the lower floor, but you still felt the sudden panic of danger like a clammy film on your skin, constricting the air around you til you couldn’t breathe properly. Steve told you to wait here, to keep quiet, but as more explosions and larger sounds of shouting sounded, you found yourself propelled out of the bed, movements slow and halting as you moved with your heavily pregnant body. You were completely naked, and as you padded over to grab your robe from the hook near the bathroom door and slung it on, a booming sound of helicopter blades whipping the air appeared quicker than should’ve been possible. 

Then the room was flooded with harsh light, and you whirled around to see several bright spots of light outside the window across the room, whipping to the bed before moving around the room. You knew instantly you needed to move, to not let those searching lights find you, and instinct had you bolting through the bathroom and into the hallway through the separate door. Just as you entered the hallway, the sound of splintering and exploding glass sounded from you and Steve’s bedroom and you had to cover your mouth with your hand to not scream in terror. 

You needed to hide, or find Steve, but from the sounds of commotion still coming from the first floor, it sounded like he was occupied fighting several people at once. You ran up the corridor and slipped into the closet at the end, right by the staircase, cramming inside with an array of coats and suit jackets. Your breathing was out of control, heaving, wet, raspy sounds as you fought back tears, your heartbeat in your ears. 

Who were these people? Why were they doing this? 

You heard footsteps pounding down the hall along with shouting voices. You couldn’t hear them clearly, but caught someone telling another that there was “someone here with the target”. You tried to remember if their searching lights had hit you before you ran into the bathroom, but no, they’d had to have seen your clothes or something. Had they come for Steve, then? Why?   

Footsteps descended the staircase and you took in a shaky breath, mind fighting the way you threatened to freeze up in terror. You were safe here, they hadn’t seen you. You just needed to wait it out until Steve took them out. There were so many of them, though, and your legs almost fell out from under you at the thought of Steve not making it. How could you possibly make it on your own then? Terrorizing thoughts filled your mind, of ending up alone after all you’ve been through, alone on the streets, or worse, kidnapped and used for experimentation for the child in your womb - your child. 

Suddenly the door to the closet was wrenched open, and you came face to face with a figure clad in stealth gear, face entirely masked but for his eyes, dark and glaring, massive gun in his hands. He made to grab at you before his eyes shifted down and widened. He staggered back a tiny step as he beheld your pregnant belly, and your hands came up instinctively to cradle it, as if you could protect it that way. 

“G forty eight,” the figure said, still staring down at your body, “found another subject. Woman. P-pregnant, sir,” he said, and there was a tiny tremor in his voice that you didn’t like, like he was pleading for something. 

You stood there frozen staring at him as he listened for whatever answer would come in what you assumed was an earpiece of some kind. But as he made to grab you, grip so tight it hurt around your plump, upper arm, your fight reflex kicked in and you shoved at his chest with everything you had, a small shout of “no” escaping your lips. 

To your utter astonishment, the figure flew back from the force of your shove, clean off his feet and then right down the grand staircase. Your eyes widened to the point of pain as you stood, stunned, and watched his limp form sprawled lifeless at the foot of the stairs. 

Had you done that?

You had no more time to ponder what had just happened. Movement in your peripheral vision had your head whipping to see another masked figure clad in stealth gear appear from your bedroom, running towards you. You had nowhere to run but down the stairs, and on slow, naked feet, you started the descent, for you knew whatever you did, you could not let them get their hands on you. Maybe if you got to the garden you could hide in the abundant shrubberies and hidden pathways. You knew them by heart, and could easily navigate even in the dark of night. 

But as you got to the foot of the stairs and started across the floor towards the living room, you were stopped dead in your tracks by the sight of Steve, still only clad in boxers, fighting two masked strangers at once. He landed a brutal punch to the jaw of one, and you could hear the crunch of bone from where you stood several meters away. Steve turned and kicked the other man in the knee, and your head spun as you saw the knee crack back at an unnatural angle, the man wailing in pain. Steve turned to the other one and grabbed his arm, twisting it clean around without even seeming to try and then threw the man into the nearest wall. The wall had a dent in it as the man slid lifeless to the ground. Steve’s face didn’t even flinch as he dealt all this carnage, his face a smooth mask of calm concentration, and you could feel your stomach churning to a knot as you watched, eyes glued to your man, your sweet, loving, doting man, completely obliterating these strangers, dealing injuries they would probably live with for the rest of their lives. Your blood started roaring in your ears, the room spinning slightly from the onslaught of what you witnessed. 

As Steve went to grab the man with the broken knee, a hand clasped around your arm, breaking you out of your frozen state of observation, and you were pushed down. You slid to your knees, the marble hard under your kneecaps as you cried out more in fear than pain. The man pulled a gun from the belt at his waist and pointed it at you and your life flashed before your eyes, your lungs completely deflating, unable to pull in even an ounce of breath in a sensation of petrified fright you’d never felt before. A sound somewhere between a wail and a whimper left you. 

“Stop or else she gets it,” the man shouted. 

You blinked your eyes, trying to get them to focus, and found Steve, splattered in blood, fists clenched at his sides, staring at the man above you with a sort of menace that had cold shivers running down your sides, sending your instincts into a frenzy. There was death in those eyes. Stone cold, calculated, immovable death. 

The man with the broken knee staggered behind Steve, pulling out a sharp knife that glinted in the dim moonlight pouring in from the windows above the main doors behind you. Your eyes followed the movement, but then struggled to keep up as Steve turned, grabbed the man’s hand and turned it upwards to jab the knife into his own throat. You jolted at the impact, the gurgled gasp the man gave through the mask. Then, Steve moved quicker than humanly possible, and when you next registered his position, he had the man above you by the throat. 

The gun pointed at your head skidded across the floor away from you, and when you looked up, you were first met with the gnarled angles of the fingers on the hand the man had held the gun with. Then, as you raised your eyes, heart in your throat, you saw Steve wrench the knife out of the throat of the man. 

Hot blood jetted out of him and you felt it rain across your face and body in warm, soft splatters. Petrified, mind glossing over in terror, you couldn’t move an inch as Steve, eyes wide with a sort of feral, inhuman fury you’d never seen before, punched his hand into the open gash in the man’s throat, and with a roar, tore his head clean his shoulders with his bare hands. A shrill shriek tore itself from your throat.

A wave of blood spouted from where the man’s head had been and drenched over you, covering your hair, your face and running down between the open flaps of your robe to cover your naked form. You barely managed to close your eyes in time, but your mouth and nose were filled with the unmistakable, overwhelming taste and aroma of warm iron. 

Your mind stopped working then, shutting down completely in order not to take in more of the slaughter around you. Time slowed to the sluggish beats of your heart, and Steve’s voice was a far away thing as he called your name. He picked you up and carried you somewhere, but your mind couldn’t decipher where, your body numb and far away from you. Darkness closed around you. Your hands were cold. 

You didn’t realize Steve had locked you in the cupboard under the stairs before he wrenched it open some indiscernible time later and carefully picked you up and carried you up the stairs. 

“I’m sorry, sweetheart, I needed to check if there were any more of them,” he murmured into your head as he carried you into the bathroom and sat you down on the edge of the bathtub before starting the water. 

“You hid me in the cupboard?” you heard yourself asking, though you couldn’t remember telling your mouth to move. 

“Yes.” 

“I tried hiding in the coat closet earlier,” you said, and your voice was a hoarse, timid thing, barely perceptible to yourself. 

Steve appeared before you, eyes gentle as he cupped your face in a hand. 

“You did? Well done, that was a clever thing to do, even though I told you to stay put,” he said. 

“They came in through the window,” you said. 

“I saw. We’ll put you in your own room tonight. But first we need to clean you. Can you stand for me?” he asked, so gentle compared to the brutal, animalistic way he’d dealt with the strangers, how he’d pulled…pulled the head…

You couldn’t finish that thought, only nodded as Steve helped you onto unsteady feet, peeled your soiled robe off you and guided the both of you into the shower. The blood washed off you, coloring the water a faint rusty hue before it whirled down the drain. 

After, Steve lowered you into the bathtub, gently scrubbing your shoulders with a loofa. He didn’t get into it himself and you realized first later that he was probably on alert in case anyone else showed up. No one did, the night was eerily quiet again. 

When Steve had you dressed in a silky nightgown and put you to bed in your old bedroom, the sheets cool and soothing on your skin, you found your voice again. 

“The baby is okay,” you whispered, cradling your belly in your hands again. 

Steve stroked your hair and smiled gently at you. 

“I know. You told me earlier.”

“I did?” You couldn’t remember having said anything about the baby, though your belly felt completely normal, settled and calm, a sturdy weight on your front compared to the way the rest of your body seemed like frayed fringes of nerves and flesh flapping on an invisible wind. 

“Yes, right after. You probably don’t remember since you’re in shock right now,” he said, before sitting down on the floor next to the bed and grasping your hand in his. “I promise I will never let anybody come that close to hurting you again. I’m gonna hunt down anybody that even tries, and gut them. No one will hurt you. Ever. Not as long as I’m around,” he vowed, and the way his eyes shone with a feral intent, so intense you nearly broke away from the eye contact, told you he wasn’t kidding.

Dark unconsciousness took you without contemplation, sucking down your frail mind and numb body to sleep. When you awoke, Steve was sitting on the bed, fully clad. The bright light of the sun in the room told you it was day, and when your mind came to completely, you heard the milling of voices all throughout the house. You jolted instinctively, but Steve’s hand on your shoulder halted you from bolting from the bed. 

“No, sweets, it’s okay. They’re friends, colleagues, here to investigate,” Steve said calmly, and your hand came up to cling to him as you tried to steady your rapidly beating heart. “We’re moving. To a safer place,” Steve explained further, and then movement by the door caught your eye. 

A man, as tall as Steve and as bulky if not more so, with dark, shoulder-length hair and a faint stubble on his chin, stepped into the room. He smiled politely at you and inclined his head at Steve. His eyes were blue, soft and kind as they looked back at you. 

“Y/N, this is my friend Bucky,” Steve said gently, “he’s gonna be helping us out.”

[adventure-showdown]

What is your favourite Doctor Who story?

ROUND 1 MASTERPOST

synopses and propaganda under the cut

The Horns of Nimon

Synopsis

When the TARDIS collides with a spaceship en route to the planet Skonnos, the Fourth Doctor, Romana II and K9 soon uncover the horrific truth about its cargo. The ship is carrying young sacrifices for a powerful, horned creature called the Nimon.

But why is the creature so desperate for the delivery, and what other dangers await the time travellers? All will be revealed at the centre of the labyrinthine Power Complex on Skonnos...

Propaganda no propaganda submitted

The Seeds of Doom

Synopsis

When scientists in the Antarctic uncover a mysterious seed pod, the Doctor is called in to investigate. He soon realises it is extraterrestrial and extremely dangerous. At the same time, however, ruthless millionaire plant-lover Harrison Chase has learned of the find and decides he must have the pod for his collection of rare and beautiful flora. Meanwhile the pod itself harbours intelligent life with sinister plans of its own...

Propaganda no propaganda submitted

[coleblackblood]

Fic Masterpost

It was brought to my attention that I don't often post my fics on here, and that might be a good idea.

Honestly never did it before cause I'm lazy forgetful didn't think about it for various reasons, but I also now have enough people who are interested in my fics now that I can justify doing so.

(Read: people in the servers - Hiiiii Rooks/People of the Grove!)

Hope this helps you find stuff to read!

Note: If there's a double asterick on a fic's pairing, that means it's spicy (aka don't read it at work)

Last Updated: 7/20/24

Glenwood (CastleAudios ASMR):

Glenwood Musings - General

The (Sometimes Human) Guide to Werewolf Dating - Seer & Evie

Long Day - Ranger

Running Her Mouth - Seer/Beth

Crossed Paths - Multiple Pairings

Knightly Musings - Knight

Ranger's Secret - Claire/Ranger, Seer/Beth (crack fic)

Keep That Pretty Mouth Shut - Dear/Rose

Testing Some Things Out - Seer/Beth**

Cuddle Jealousy - Seer/Beth, Ranger/Claire, Claire & Seer

Cuddle Jealousy (Light Edition) - Seer/Beth, Ranger/Claire, Claire & Seer

The Trials of Being a Southern Lady Simp - Sugar/Miss Liza

Quenching the Flames - Ranger/Claire

Stay Comfy and Culty - Abigail & OC

Omega - Claire/Ranger

A Debt Repaid - Claire & Valera (Past Claire/Valera)

Glenwood Archive - Keep Out (This Means You) - Multi Pairings

Breathe - Claire/Ranger, Beth/Seer, Knight/Evie, Pack (individual chapters)

Glenwood Shoots Their Shot - Multi Pairings**

5 Times Seer Begged and 1 Time They Didn't Have To (But Did Anyway) - Seer/Beth**

Rest Day - Dear/Abby/Rose

The Gratest Competition - Claire/Ranger (Crack fic)

Something Borrowed - Beth/Seer, Beth & Joanna/Her Mom

Good Enough - Dear/Abby/Rose

Cookies - Ranger/Claire

(B)romance? - Multiple Pairings (Knight/Seer focus)

Rest Day Part 2 - Dear/Abby/Rose**

The Taste of Hunger and Time - Sugar/Miss Liza

Too Serious, Too Quick - Sugar/Miss Liza, Sugar & Celine

Rogue's Blood - Rogue & Multiple Characters

A Chance Meeting - Celine/Lydia/Deviant, Celine/Deviant**

Sugar and Spice - Sugar/Ranger**

Ashwood Grove (Will o' the Wisp Audios):

Life at Ashwood Grove University - Sparks

Electric Sparks - Sparks/Char

Friendly Reminders - Sparks/Eri

Head Empty - Sparks/Eri**

Denim-Clad Goddamn - Monroe/Sugar**

Gotta Make Your Own Fun - Monroe/Sugar

Give Her Something Else to Put Her Lips On (Respectfully) - Grey/Troublemaker

The Omegaverse Fic Nobody Asked For (Version 1) - Omega!Ashton/Alpha!Jackass**

The Omegaverse Fic Nobody Asked For (Version 2) - Alpha!Ashton/Omega!Jackass**

Round Two - Char/Eri/Shae/Sparks**

Starstruck - Char/Sparks

Beastly - Noir/Aries**

Ashwood Grove Explains the Omegaverse - Multiple** (Crack)

Closet Quickie - Alpha!Noir/Omega!Aries**

Willpower - Sunshine/Morgan**

Saving You, Saving Me - Lore/Gorgeous

Far Cry 5:

Far Cry 5 (Soulmates AU) - Deputy/Seeds

Far Cry 5 Ficlets - Multiple

Kinktober**:

Far Cry 5 Drabbles - Kinktober 2022

FC5 Kinktober 2022 (Series - each day a separate fic)

Kinktober 2023 - Glenwood Edition

Kinktober 2023 - Ashwood Edition

[datapacks]

BLOCK-OFF MASTERPOST

Lets figure out what the best minecraft block is! 64 competitors, 1 survivor! Links below the cut.

Original Submisison Post

Seeding Brackets: FINISHED

Other Posts about the Polls

Updates

Sorted by Group: Group 1 Polls - Round 2 Group 2 Polls - Round 2 Group 3 Polls - Round 2 Group 4 Polls - Round 2 Group 5 Polls - Round 2 Group 6 Polls - Round 2 Group 7 Polls - Round 1 Group 8 Polls - Round 1 Finals Group - Not Yet Available

Sorted by Round: Round 1 Polls - Completed Round 2 Polls Round 3 Polls - Not Yet Available Quarter-Finals - Not Yet Available Semi-Finals - Not Yet Available Finals - Not Yet Available

Also, sorry to plug it here but this is going to be my pinned post until block-off is done, so please check out my minecraft server @archhivist if you have the time!

[iz-rarepair-tournament]

Click for larger image/higher quality!

But yes, it took a lot of fiddling graphic design is my passion but I managed to get a visual bracket made, but it's uhh not the best so I'll definitely explain it. I couldn't quite get the names to all fit in so I used icons instead, and basically, whatever line you see the icons sitting on is the line they go with. So as an example, at the top left, Tak/Tak's Ship go up against Purple/Membrane, and whoever wins that will go onto the line to the right, at which point they'll go up against Zim/Red. I think it'll become visually clearer once we get past the initial round, but I'm so sorry for this clutter, aa

This is seeded but I let a website choose the match-ups so if anything seems unfair, well. I'm sorry :')

Due to the weird number of pairs, we're gonna start off with a sort of preliminary round of just 6 polls for those pairs you see on the far left and right sides of the bracket. The winners of those polls will then go up against whoever they're matched to on the bracket, at which point we will have a huge round 1, then round 2, etc etc until we eventually arrive at a winner

The preliminary round will consist of:

Tak/Tak's Ship vs Tallest Purple/Professor Membrane

Professor Membrane/Mr. Dwicky vs Tak/Zib

Ms. Bitters/Countess von Verminstrasser vs Zib/Zimtwo

Sizz-Lorr/Mr. Dwicky vs Tallest Red/Announcer Irken

Professor Membrane/Tallest Miyuki vs Tallest Red/Professor Membrane

Jessica/Letty vs Zim/Professor Membrane

Following that, there will be polls for:

Zim/Tallest Red vs a winner from preliminary round

Tallest Miyuki/Tallest Spork vs Zim/Prisoner 777

Dib/Zib vs Gretchen/Zita

GIR/Mimi vs Gaz/Keef

Dib/Lard Nar vs a winner from preliminary round

Dib/Mr. Dwicky vs Dib/Skoodge

Dib/Gretchen vs Dib/Professor Membrane

Skoodge/Keef vs a winner from preliminary round

Dib/Keef vs a winner from preliminary round

Professor Membrane/Zim's Computer vs Zim/Tallest Purple

Dib/Torque Smackey vs Keef/Chammy Wamboo

Tak/Tenn vs Gaz/Gretchen

Tak/Skoodge vs a winner from preliminary round

Lard Nar/Prisoner 777 vs Bill/Count Cocofang

Dib/Gaz vs Dib/Tallest Purple

Dib/Tallest Red vs a winner from preliminary round

PHEW. Hope that clears it all up, sorry again for the trainwreck of a bracket but I wanted SOME kinda visual at least. And I'll update the bracket and likely keep it on the masterpost as time goes on. But yes, those are the ships.

Now give me some time to get the polls prepared and then I'll start posting them :D We'll do week-long polls for maximum engagement.

Fun fact, Dib has the most unique pairs in this tournament at 11 different pairs! (slaps his back) this bad boy can fit SO many rarepairs in him

[a-dinosaur-a-day]

Eofringillirostrum vs Heliothraupis

Factfiles:

Eofringillirostrum boudreauxi, E. parvulum 

Artwork by @otussketching, written by @zygodactylus

Name Meaning: Dawn Finch-Beak (Boudreaux’s or Small) 

Time: 54 to 48 million years ago, in the Ypresian of the Eocene 

Location: Sandwich Beds, Fossil Butte Member, Green River Formation, Wyoming; and the Messel Formation near Darmstadt, Germany 

Today, over half of the birds known in the world are passerines, or “perching birds”. Unfortunately, these birds on average are small and delicate, leading to their not having the most robust fossil record compared to other birds. However, the fossils of passerines we do have tell us an interesting story about their evolution. Eofringillirostrum, despite being a very early member of the total-passeriform group (ie, it isn’t a true passerine, but close), shows how many of the traits we see in modern representatives occurred fairly early on in their evolution. Eofringillirostrum had a finch-like beak, similar to living species, that would have been helpful in eating small hard seeds - a niche not easily exploited. While we often think of birds as “seed-eaters”, this is not common and only exploitable by certain species - and, apparently, some early passerine relatives like Eofringillirostrum. This indicates that different early relatives of passerines were already doing very similar ecological jobs to their living relatives, even while many other bird types were exploiting passerine-like niches (such as the many types of stem-mouse birds that lived at the time). Both the Messel Pit and the Fossil Butte environments were tropical forests, emerging right after the Paleocene-Eocene Thermal Maximum; both were associated with fossil lakes, which allowed for rapid preservation of a variety of early animals that show how “modern” life first diversified in the Paleogene period. As such, Eofringillirostrum just has too many neighbors to list - including so many kinds of birds its a little overwhelming. Eofringillirostrum, in this environment, would have been one of many different species of birds, and weirdly modern looking among them! 

Heliothraupis oneilli 

Photograph by John C. Mittermeier, written by @zygodactylus 

Name Meaning: O’Neill’s Tanager of the Sun God Inti 

Time: Unknown to the present, Holocene, Quaternary 

Location: Western Bolivia and Southern Peru, South America  Rarely do we get to talk about a newly discovered living species of bird, but this is one of those excellent times! This bird, a bright yellow tanager with a distinctive black stripe across its eye, was found in the Neotropics - specifically in the Yungas region. Given that Latin America has the largest number of bird species in the world, it makes a certain amount of sense that we may have missed some! First spotted in the nineties, it was properly identified and described over the course of the 2010s. The distinctive appearance of this tanager lead to it being nicknamed the “Kill Bill Tanager”, in reference to its similarity to Uma Thurman’s yellow jumpsuit outfit. Distinct in appearance and population from other tanagers, it was deemed not only a separate species, but an entirely separate genus. It is migratory, breeding in the northern Machariapo Valley and going down to the eastern Andes for the nonbreeding season. It lives in deciduous forests, and breeds in bamboo grasses. It is a loud and vocal bird, making distinctive songs and choruses that happen long after the dawn chorus of most other birds. As it lives in a fairly isolated region of these countries, its habitat is not particularly threatened at this time.

DMM Round One Masterpost

[klainepornytourney]

Hi!

What the hell is going on here, you ask?

Simply put, we’re here for the fuck of it. That is to say, for the fun of our boys and their, er, polls. 😏

We want to show our love for all the smuttiest, most glorious, gratuitous fics that have entertained us since Kurt and Blaine first touched…lips. Fingertips? Let’s be real, soon as their eyes met, the eye fucking swiftly evolved into, well, fucking in the brains of fans around the globe. So, here we are!

The fic tournament will start late February, and run until we're all out of polls. In the mean time, we'll be posting a few fun polls per week about Kurt and Blaine, and their sex lives, so get your headcanons ready and start voting!

While we are supportive of all the ways Kurt and Blaine are DTF, we (unfortunately) DNF with certain kinks and tropes which you might notice the absence of in our posts/polls/tournaments.

You'll find the hows, whats and whatnots under the cut, along with the links to poll masterposts, and if your question isn't answered there, please send us an ask and we'll get back to you!

Which fics will qualify? Any completed E rated Klaine fic posted on ao3 between 2010 and 2023, that is under 10k words and written in English. (Sorry longer fics, you usually have too much plot between all the porny bits and we don't have time to read you all.)

How will the tournament run? We're still working out the exact details of it, so this answer will be updated with more info soon!

How will we keep things fun for everyone? If you want to be excluded, send us an ask and we'll take you off the list, no questions asked. We'll only be naming the fic titles and including fic links in our posts, so there won't be any blogs tagged or ao3 accounts linked. The different kinks and tropes categories will have their own tags so you can filter out anything you don't want to see, while still getting the rest of the polls. We'll provide you with a full list of categories and tags when we've finalized the tournament design.

What will we NOT include? Anything nobody in our group is willing to read. Currently, that list includes mpreg, bestiality, dub/noncon, b!p, adult/minor relationships (unless the 'adult' is 18/19), cheating, incest, watersports/scat, Karofsky, slavery, A/B/O, or fics where they're younger than 15.

We're aware that this may mean some of your fav fics won't be included, but we can only include fics that at least one of us will read due to the selection process.

How do we select fics? Scrolling. So much scrolling. We made lists of all the fics that meet the basic requirements, and then divided them up and started skimming them (okay fine, we ended up reading most of them) to be sure there were no hidden untagged triggers or unhappy endings. Fic quality or popularity was not a factor.

Are there any fics that will be polled differently from the rest? Yes! Some authors have been so particularly prolific, that there's just too much smutty goodness to choose from. Instead, they will have their own categories to narrow the options down before the winners join the general tournament. Again, if you're one of them and don't want to be included, let us know!

If there are a lot of fics in one category, then we'll seed (pun intended) some fics to the next rounds based on publish date.

Will it only be Klaine fics? Of course! They might have some (male) friends along for the ride, or a spectator or three, but they will always both be there, either in person or digitally.

How do I decide which fic to vote for? That's completely up to you! You can vote because you like the author, because it got your motor running, or just because the other one sucked in a not so fun way. Be as subjective or objective as you want, it's porn after all and my kink may not be yours! ;)

Are there any rules for reblogging or commenting on tournament polls? We ask that you don't name any authors or link to their blogs unless you have explicit permission from them. If you come across a fic or a kink you don't like, just filter it out and move on. This tournament is supposed to be fun and we will not tolerate any (kink) shaming or bullying.

As cliché as it sounds, everyone is a winner here. We chose the tournament style for this blog because polls are fun and we like to click things, but the real goal is to celebrate ALL the smut we as a fandom have been so lucky to receive.

Will you reveal yourselves? Nope.

We hope everyone will have just as much fun reading and voting as we had setting this up!

xoxo The KlainePornyTourney mods

Links to various masterposts:

Threesome Mini Tourney

Fuck, Marry, Kill

Non-fic polls masterlist

[companion-showdown-dot-org]

Most Likely to Lick the Glowing Green Goo Seeding Round

It's time for another tournament, and you know what that means, A SEEDING ROUND. This time we're looking for the companion who is most likely to lick glowing green goo

obviously this could still be overtaken in the next time poll (here), if thats the case i'll just use this seeding round later

see you at @companion-showdown on Saturday!

Group 1: Susan, Ian, Barbara, Vicki, Steven, Katarina, Sara Kingdom, Dodo

Group 2: Ben, Polly, Jamie, Victoria, Zoe, The Brigadier, Benton, Liz

Group 3: Jo, Yates, Sarah-Jane, Harry, Leela, K9, Romana I, Romana II

Group 4: Adric, Nyssa, Tegan, Turlough, Kamelion, Peri, Mel, Ace

Group 5: Grace, Chang Lee, Rose, Mickey, Adam, Jack, Martha, Wilf

Group 6: Donna, River, Amy, Rory, Kate, Clara, Handles, Bill

Group 7: Nardole, Yaz, Graham, Ryan, Dan, Fitz Kreiner, Evelyn Smythe, Frobisher

Group 8: Charley Pollard, C'rizz, Bernice Summerfield, Gillian and John Who, Iris Wildthyme, Lucie Miller, Hex Schofield, Alison Cheney

Which group contains the companion you think should win

[mcytblrsexymen]

what does the term “seeds” mean? i’ve seen the word a couple of times but i don’t actually know what it means ajhvnhfdbi

also, will you pin sexyman bracket? for easy viewing and whatnot

don't worry, the bracket will be pinned when round 1 starts, on a masterpost which will be updated with links to each poll.

as for 'seed' - it is a term used in creating tournament brackets, indicative of how 'strong' the team/player is expected to be. higher seed is expected to be able to beat a lower seed - so scar is the 1 seed because he's expected to be able to beat anyone else, for example. there are different ways to decide what seed a player is when creating a bracket, but in our case, it's the ranking of how many nominations a person got.

(interestingly, i feel like this actually makes the lower seeds much less accurate than high seeds. the high seeds all got so many nominations to get in that, proportionally, they often aren't that close to each other, but many of the lower seeds got few enough nominations that between voter fraud and their proximity to their neighbors, they may be wildly stronger or weaker than their seed suggests. i'm excited to see it play out!)

[companion-showdown]

Who had the worst time aboard the TARDIS?

ROUND 0 MASTERPOST

[divine-swag-summit]

WHO IS THE SWAGGIEST GOD-LIKE BEING OF THEM ALL?

Here are our 128 contestants! Since there are so many of them, the bracket has been split into two brackets based on the number of submissions each contestant has gotten. I tried to seed the bracket based on character popularity but I'm not familiar enough with most of these characters, so I'm sorry if your fave loses to someone way more popular than them!

So.

How is this gonna work?

Round 1 will be split into 4 parts, Higher Bracket A and B, and Lower Bracket A and B. Each of these parts will have their own day of voting. Round 2 will then be two parts, Higher Bracket and Lower Bracket. Like Round 1, each part of Round 2 will have a separate voting day. From Round 3 on, the Higher Bracket and Lower Bracket will be voted on simultaneously.

There will also be a Losers Bracket consisting of the 32 worst losers(biggest gap in votes) of round 1! This bracket will be going on in between regular rounds!

Then, the winner of each bracket(yes, that includes the Losers Bracket) will face each other in the finals in a three way poll!

VOTING RULES

This tournament isn’t about power or moral compass, it’s about SWAG! Vote for the cooler character! Remember, this isn’t a deathmatch or a philosophical debate, it’s a swag summit!

NO VOTER FRAUD. If I find out people have been botting polls or using alt accounts to vote multiple times, both competitors in the fraudulent poll will be disqualified automatically. If this begins happening to multiple polls, I will cancel the tournament altogether.

YOU ARE ALLOWED AND ENCOURAGED TO MAKE PROPAGANDA SING THE PRAISES OF YOUR GODS AND GODLIKE BEINGS! Tag me in them or use the tag #divineswagsummit2023 and I will reblog them when I see them! Anti-propaganda is also allowed, just don't be mean about it!

HAVE FUN AND BE NICE TO EACH OTHER! At the ends of the day this is just a silly character tournament, so have fun! You are obviously allowed to root for your faves and make propaganda, but please don’t be mean or pick fights with other fans. If the fighting gets too heated, I will disqualify contestants and maybe even cancel the tournament if I have to.

TAGS:

#divine matchup = polls

#divine wisdom = tournament rules and important announcements

#messages from the prophets = answered asks

#prayers for the divine = tournament propaganda

#the prophet’s musings = random, largely unimportant thoughts from the prophet(me!)

#other tournaments = promos for other tournaments

#not divine matchup = anything that isn’t a poll, tournament rules, or important announcements

In addition to these tags, every poll will be tagged with the names and fandoms of the characters participating.

ROUND MASTERPOSTS

PRELIMINARY ROUND WINNERS

HIGHER BRACKET ROUND 1-A: THURSDAY JUNE 1

HIGHER BRACKET ROUND 1-B: FRIDAY JUNE 2

LOWER BRACKET ROUND 1-A: SUNDAY JUNE 4

LOWER BRACKET ROUND 1-B: MONDAY JUNE 5

ROUND 1 SUMMARY

LOSERS BRACKET ROUND 1: THURSDAY JUNE 8

HIGHER BRACKET ROUND 2: SATURDAY JUNE 10

LOWER BRACKET ROUND 2: SUNDAY JUNE 11

ROUND 2 SUMMARY

LOSERS BRACKET ROUND 2: WEDNESDAY JUNE 14

ROUND 3: SATURDAY JUNE 17

ROUND 3 SUMMARY

LOSERS BRACKET ROUND 3: MONDAY JUNE 19

ROUND 4: WEDNESDAY JUNE 21

ROUND 4 SUMMARY

LOSERS BRACKET SEMIFINALS: SATURDAY JUNE 25

QUARTERFINALS: WEDNESDAY JUNE 28

QUARTERFINALS SUMMARY

LOSERS BRACKET FINALS: SUNDAY JULY 2

SEMIFINALS: TUESDAY JULY 4

SEMIFINALS SUMMARY

FINALS: FRIDAY JULY 7

[best-evangelion-girl]

masterpost of all polls and other posts so far. (this will be updated when newer polls are made)

why are the things called that (a post badly explaining the naming conventions of the different forms of media)

polls

round 1:

1 misato's car vs Kaji's watermelons

2 Eva 08 vs Eva Imaginary

3 9th angel vs Magi-3 Casper

4 Zuriel vs Magi-2 Balthasar

5 Gaghiel vs Magi-1 Melchior

6 Mark.09 vs Leliel

7 Armisael vs berserk Unit 01 (rebuilds)

8 5th Angel vs Unit 00 (NGE)

9 Eva 44A vs Pen Pen

10 12th angel vs 4th angel

11 Eva 03 (NTE) vs 3rd angel

12 Sahaquiel vs Eva 44B

13 Unit 00 (NTE) vs Unit 01 (NGE)

14 Unit 05 vs Adam (NGE)

15 Shamshel vs 6th angel

16 Mark.06 vs berserk Unit 01 (NGE)

17 Mark.04A vs Unit 02 Berserk (EoE)

18 Unit 03 (NGE) vs Bardiel

19 Eva 04 (NTE) vs Failed Evangelion Prototypes

20 AAA Wunder vs 9th Angel

21 Unit 01 (NTE) vs Unit 02 (NGE)

22 Sandalphon vs Mass Production Evas

23 Adams (NTE) vs Seventh Angel

24 Mark.04B vs Kaworu Nagisa

25 11th angel vs Ramiel

26 Arael vs Israfel

27 Mark.04C vs Matarael

28 10th angel vs beast mode eva 02

29 Eva 04 (NGE) vs Sachiel

30 Eva 02 (NTE) vs Berserk Unit 00 (NGE)

31 Eva 13 vs Ireul

32 Eva 4444C vs Lilith

round 2:

1 Misato's car vs Eva Imaginary

2 Magi-3 Casper vs Magi-2 Balthasar

3 Magi-1 Melchior vs Leliel

4 Armisael vs Eva Unit 00 (NGE)

5 Pen Pen vs Twelfth Angel

6 Eva Unit 03 (NTE) vs Sahaquiel

7 Eva Unit 01 (NGE) vs Adam (NGE)

8 Sixth Angel vs Berserk Unit 01 (NGE)

(I fucked up. berserk Unit 02 vs bardiel and failed prototypes vs Wunder should be 9 and 10 but I accidentally skipped them. they're gonna be 15 and 16 this round. thanks for understanding)

9 Eva Unit 02 vs Mass Production Evas

10 Seventh Angel vs Kaworu Nagisa

11 Ramiel vs Arael

12 Matarael vs Eva Unit 02 Beast Mode

13 Sachiel vs Unit 00 Berserk (NGE)

14 Eva 13 vs Lilith

15 Berserk Unit 02 (EoE) vs Bardiel

16 Failed Evangelion Prototypes vs AAA Wunder

(I want the seeding to work correctly, so the winner of poll 15 and the winner of poll 16 will still compete against each other in what will be poll 5 in round 3. and then the winner of poll 5 round 3 will complete against the winner of poll 6 round 3 in poll 3 round 4. I hope that makes sense. basically, the seeding will still be correct. it's just round 2 that slightly off in numbering because I can't edit the polls. just pretend that poll 15 and 16 are actually 9 and 10, and everything else has been moved back by two polls.)

round 3:

1 Misato's Car vs Magi-3 Casper

2 Leliel vs Eva Unit 00 (NGE)

3 Pen Pen vs Sahaquiel

4 Eva Unit 01 vs Berserk Unit 01 (both NGE)

5 Berserk Unit 02 (EoE) vs Failed Evangelion Prototypes

6 Eva Unit 02 (NGE) vs Kaworu Nagisa

7 Ramiel vs Eva Unit 02 Beast Mode (NTE)

8 Sachiel vs Lilith

round 4:

1 Misato's Car vs Leliel

2 Pen Pen vs Berserk Unit 01

3 Berserk Unit 02 vs Kaworu Nagisa

4 Ramiel vs Lilith

round 5 semifinals:

1 Misato's Car vs Pen Pen

2 Berserk Unit 02 vs Ramiel

Final round!:

1 Misato's Car vs Ramiel