#seems like that could break bad real easily but it hasn't just yet

[the-obnoxious-sibling]

“well, buggy fans are willing to forgive much worse behavior from other characters they ship him with, so that hasn't stopped me!”

And that’s the thing I kinda don’t like about buggy ships tbh. I don’t think I like them just because most of them are…. Extremely mean to Buggy? I never had favourite character like this. That’s why I kinda want just one person who would really liked my blorbo? Like does Buggy even has one genuine relationship rn? I was naive because I did thought of his crew as a little more genuine, and after marine ford my stupid brain did thought at least mr3 is not gonna left him the minute buggy out of picture. And Oda destroyed my hopes every single time. He’s not that unlikable in canon :(

(context)

yeah, you know, that's fair! some people like for their fave to suffer, and some want to protect them from the cruelty of the world. i'm somewhere in between, myself; i can enjoy a bit of buggy schadenfreude, but only if i feel like he really earned it, reaping what he sowed and all that.

…and tbh, i think this lack of genuine relationships is another reaping/sowing situation.

like, buggy had genuine connections in his youth and they all abandoned him (save one, but let's not get distracted by shuggy rn). is it any wonder he was disillusioned, and sought out bonds based on self-interest and false images of his own greatness?

when buggy was a moderately-sized fish in a small pond, he must have felt just as sure as you, anon, that he'd found the best possible crew this way. who needs sincerity or personal loyalty?! all you need is a badass facade and a common goal!

the downside to such superficial bonds only makes itself known when the illusion breaks down, or when it's no longer in someone's self-interest to support buggy.

[gayofthefae]

"I am now"

This is not a couple that's broken up. This is a couple that are having troubles and technically aren't dating right now. There was no tension in that hug. The tension was in holding back from it.

When I do stage/screen chemistry I think of magnets: am I being pulled or repelled towards anyone or anything in the room I'm comfortable with and who/what and why. Usually, a real breakup would a repulsion - emotionally, more complicated, but physically? A repulsion. Their actions, especially hers, being so distancing should seem to indicate a desire to stay away - repulsion. Not just breakups, even fights within relationships: ever heard the line "I don't wanna be near you right now"?

But they aren't doing that. They're resisting the urge to be near each other because it is still their default and their instinct. This was really just a wordy way of saying look at the relaxation that set in as soon as they allowed themselves to hug. The way she fell into it. The way he closed his eyes.

They missed this, not just in the grieving way, or even just in the "I want it back" way. In the habitual way. In the "when I feel sad I go to call you and have to stop myself" way. In the way that they are still in a relationship in their head so naturally that they still gravitate towards each other emotionally even if they override it logically sometimes.

The way they hugged so easily and relieved to be able to? They're acting like they know this is just a break. Like I said to start, they're acting like a couple who are fighting but willing to put it aside because they need each other. They're acting like a couple who are fighting, not one who are broken up.

Even just the line "this doesn't change the fact that I am still mad at you" somehow implies to me a resolution to that anger. For now I am mad and we still need to solve that, don't go believing we're there yet, but you need a hug right now.

They both have every intention of coming back and aren't denying themselves that.

Truly, that hug is just "things aren't complicated or bad enough between us that you aren't still the most comforting person to me". Sometimes, when you're really mad or distant from someone, that sullies all comfort they could give you. It hasn't for them. Her anger is in an isolated box from their love that she can put away for them to need each other. Just how you would in order to sustain a relationship without breaking up.

[likeabxrdinflight]

Naturally I have a lot of thoughts about Azula's role in the live action adaptation. I'd say about 95% of them are positive thoughts.

First of all, I love that she is this baby-faced, squishy-cheeked kid (I know her actress is a little older than the character but that's okay.) At Elizabeth Yu's age, I also easily passed for 14-15, she just has a young-looking face and clearly hasn't lost all her baby fat. And that is perfect, actually. I've criticized the sharpness and angularity of the animated Azula many times over, she has always looked far too old for her canonical age. I've said it before and I'll say it again- it's a problem that so many people watched the original cartoon and thought Azula was older than Zuko. I can't even blame them for it, she's drawn to look 20 or older. So it is wonderful to see a version of Azula who looks closer to her canonical age. I think it really drives home the point.

That said, this Azula is definitely different than her animated counterpart in other ways. The animated Azula was (almost) always perfectly in control. She could become angry and snap at people- but it was fairly rare, Azula always seemed the image of perfect calm, control, and precision. She was deadly precisely because she was so cool and collected and did not get easily rankled. This was also part of what made her breakdown so shocking.

The thing is, the breakdown is not especially foreshadowed prior to season three. There are a few moments that show the chinks in Azula's armor, but most of them don't come until "The Beach," and then after Mai and Ty Lee's betrayal. I've always believed that betrayal was the real inciting incident for her eventual psychotic break- I've argued before that it sent Azula into what's called a prodromal state, which is like a sort of "pre-psychosis."

More on the animated version's mental state here

Point being, there's really only one instance in season two that suggests any flaws to Azula's cool exterior, and it's one of her very first scenes. You know the one: "almost isn't good enough." It makes for a very subtle build-up to the breakdown and her eventual fall. But it comes at the cost of depicting her predominantly as a capital-V Villain prior to it. You're not really supposed to sympathize with Azula until "The Beach," arguably not until "Into the Inferno." For most of the animated show's run, you're supposed to find her scary and threatening.

And this is done effectively- almost too effectively. She's an obvious foil to Zuko, and serves as such a good primary antagonist that they had to neutralize her in the finale by giving her the breakdown. It's like they knew there was no way a healthy Azula was going to be beatable during Sozin's Comet. She appeared to be an effortlessly talented fire bender, a brilliant strategist, and a more dangerous opponent than even Ozai.

Live action Azula does not have this same feeling to her. There is still something "scary" about her- we see her watching people being burned alive with little to no reaction, and her face is quite blank at Zuko's Agni Kai. She's still cunning and still willing to manipulate things to her advantage- we see this in how she plays Zhao. So if this version gets a season two I have no doubt that this Azula will still serve as a dangerous antagonist to the Gaang and I don't doubt this is still an Azula capable of bringing down Ba Sing Se.

But she's not quite the calm, collected character she first seemed in the animated version. This Azula is a little less hinged. She has more moments of snapping and losing some of that perfect control. She's more frustrated and feels more at the mercy of her father. She reads far more like the Azula we saw in "The Phoenix King," the one who talked back and protested that her father couldn't treat her like Zuko. That Azula, however, was about one bad night's sleep away from a psychotic break. This Azula, presumably, isn't there yet.

I can agree that something of her original character gets lost when you essentially start foreshadowing the breakdown from the jump. It's not gonna be a surprise to any new audiences. She's not gonna be quite the same. But it does humanize her much sooner than the original show did, and it asks the audience to consider her circumstances from the jump- is this a sympathetic character or not? I obviously think she is in the original, and I do think in the end she was meant to be. But it's much more of a debate. The live action show unequivocally says "yes" and does not make it a debate at all.

I'd be tempted to say it's not trusting the audience to read between the lines, but given all the Azula discourse...they might be right to take this more direct approach.

Anyways. Live action Azula also feels more like a real teenager. She's petty, she's irritable, she's desperate to remain in her father's favor and beat her brother in the artificial competition her father has set up between them and will go to any lengths to do so- lengths she probably wouldn't have in the cartoon. She has a strong drive to prove herself and to protect the image she constructs about herself as the "perfect daughter." But that image also feels far more fragile than it did in the animated version.

This Azula doesn't say that "almost [perfect] isn't good enough." She says that "it [perfect] isn't good enough." It's a subtle but meaningful difference.

(Side note- I think the reason this Azula is fine shooting lightning in the direction of her father, seemingly in defiance of his orders, is a direct result of the change to the Agni Kai- she watched as Ozai berated and burned Zuko for not giving him his all, versus in the original where Zuko's sin was in not fighting back period. So here she's showing Ozai her "all", she's giving him everything she has to prove she's capable of doing more than Zuko running drills and smoking out resistance rings.)

I like this change. I like this more desperate, more grounded take on Azula. She feels like a real girl in a horrendous home environment. This Azula was raised in a family where it's expected you be cool with setting people on fire in the throne room and where there's a tangible symbol of Daddy's love sitting beneath him at all times. This Azula was forged in the fires of competition and manipulation that's more subtle than the animated Ozai ever seemed capable of. (More on Ozai later, but he's a much more subtle character than his animated counterpart despite still being...pretty blatantly Evil). So I think it makes sense that she's not quite as calm and controlled and perfect as the animated version.

I don't know yet which version I'll prefer when all is said and done- she was ultimately a minor role in this season. Animated Azula is iconic and always will be, but there's a lot I've always been critical of about how she was depicted in the original show. I think a lot of us that love and empathize with Azula do so despite the way she was written, not because of it. This version might change things a little.

But it also might make it seem infinitely more cruel if she isn't given some kind of redemptive ending (or at least one that implies some hope for her.) The bleak ending of the original show might feel really bad for this more sympathetic version of Azula. So if they stick with that...I dunno. It could hit or miss.

For now, I like what I'm seeing. And Elizabeth Yu understood the assignment.

[stayinzencity]

heroine’s manual S1 E3

GENRE: Romcom, Drama | love triangles, childhood friends, high school au | INSPIRED BY: Heroine Shikkaku (shoujo manga) | LENGTH: ~1.4K | RATING: Teen | WARNINGS: mentions of food, eating | PAIRINGS: Minho x MC (Reader), Minho x OC (Heather) | TAGLIST: @linoscence @elizabeth11moreno  (ask to be added) | A/N: this chapter finally came out of the drafts after years thanks to @jisungsdaydreamer (and me accidentally posting part 5 first oops)

♡ previous episode 

♡ return to main

THREE. Even if he rejects me, I won't give up so easily and allow someone else to steal my spot.

Inviting Heather to hang out is a mistake. Having your friends around doesn't make you feel any less of a third wheel. It’s Heather who’s supposed to be the odd one out amongst your group, yet somehow it feels like the rest of you are the ones intruding. You can't bear to witness the shy glances and gentle smiles Minho and Heather exchange.

You're trying to come up with an excuse to break them apart without being the bad guy, when a crash comes to your rescue.

"Ah. My bad," Jisung apologizes, looking down at the glass he'd accidently knocked over. He'd been sitting next to Heather, and while the glass was fortunately intact, water had spilled onto Heather's lap. 

"Looks like you’re the victim of Jisung's idiocy today." Hyunjin hands her napkins, attempting to ease her through the awkwardness with his charming smile. He shoots Jisung a withering glare, getting a sheepish look and shrug in reply.  

"I guess I should get going," Heather says. She rises from her seat in a hurry, but a hand over hers gives her a reason to wait. 

Hyunjin.

Minho's expression is closer to amusement than jealousy, watching as his friend calls his girlfriend - by her actual name, not the nickname you've given her.

Maybe Hyunjin's crush hasn't disappeared yet. If he and Heather get together, then Minho would be yours again. Everything would fall perfectly in place.

"We don't live that far from each other. I'll take you home." Hyunjin pauses, turning to Minho who's sneaking cake onto Jisung's plate. "If that's fine with your boyfriend?"

"Whatever she wants," Minho says with a shrug. He doesn't seem to be worried about Hyunjin stealing away his girlfriend, which boosts your confidence in your own chances with him. 

"Yeah," you enthusiastically agree, nodding your head. "Hyunjin's a nice guy. Have a wonderful evening!"

Hyunjin narrows his eyes, scowling at you, instead of being grateful that you're helping him out. One day, he'll figure it out, and thank you.

You lean close to her so that only she - and Hyunjin, perhaps - can hear. "You might even fall for him instead of Minho."

Hyunjin scoffs at your words with an exaggerated eyeroll and drags Heather out the door before you can say anything else.

Seungmin leaves soon after them, muttering something about an assignment that you don't really bother paying attention to.

And then it's just Minho, Jisung and you.

"We should head home too," Minho says. He gets up from the table and grabs his jacket from the back of the chair. "It's movie night."

"Ah, right." Jisung sends you a wink, starting the next phase of your plan to set your story on track. "I've got some stuff I need to work on, so I'll have to trust you two to keep our tradition alive even if it’s not the same without me."

And then it was just Minho and you.

It's usually easy to forget Minho's girlfriends exist when they're not around. Often they fade into the background even when they are around.

Yet you find yourself alone with Minho, head in his lap, too distracted to actually watch the show that's playing on the TV. Too much on your mind to even enjoy this moment.

Minho's texting someone, wearing a smile as soft as the one he usually gives you before he wraps you in a hug. 

The someone in question must be Heather. After all, who else could it be? The only real rival you've ever had when it came to Minho's affection and attention is Heather, right?

If there's no struggle, then it won't feel as special when you finally end up together. Heather isn't the heroine. That title belongs to you. You're the one that's always been with Minho. No one else knows him like you do- well, maybe Jisung does. That's a different story though.

If you're the heroine, then why do you feel like you're in second place? Are you falling into a background role in your own story? Could it be you're simply a side character in this tale?

Minho's fingers run through your hair, breaking you out of your thoughts. 

You're the one here with him, not Heather. You're the heroine, not her. There's still hope. 

“I like you,” you blurt. It's far from the confession you had planned, especially since you weren't even the one who was supposed to be saying the words first. Sometimes you need to improvise to get the perfect scenes, so it's ok. “I like you so much.”

Minho’s hand stops stroking your hair. He doesn’t take it away, so you don’t attempt to sit up. You want to be close to him, for as long as you can. 

Any moment now, he'll admit his feelings for you and you'll be the one beside him instead of Heather. 

You know that, but if somehow these are the last moments you’ll have with him, you want to remember them being pleasant. Besides, you don’t exactly want to look at his face right now. The aftermath of a confession is more mortifying than you imagined, especially when you haven't gotten an answer in return. 

“I know,” he says. 

And that’s it. He doesn't say anything else. And you don't have the courage to ask what your words meant to him. 

The couple on screen breaks up and eventually makes up, but you don't even remember their names anymore. Tears fall from your eyes and you wipe them away. 

"I can't watch this anymore," you manage to whisper. It's not the drama that has you crying. You know it, and you know Minho probably does too. "I'll head home."

Minho doesn't try to stop you as you leave. As tempting as it is to turn back, you're too afraid that Minho's eyes won't be watching you.

Seungmin once explained some physics cat theory. Put a cat in a box with poison, and it could be both alive or dead as long you don't open it. If you don't check, the cat might still be alive. Something like that.

In your imagination, Minho is woefully watching as you walk away.

After the confession, it's a little hard. Minho isn't actively avoiding you, except he kind of is. He has the perfect excuses, plus the universe seems to be on his side. It's natural for the hero of the story to have exceptional luck. 

As the heroine, you don't seem to have the same advantage. If anything, there's just been obstacles to your perfect ending. The biggest one turning out to be Minho himself.

You thought you didn't have to do anything and everything would fall into place by itself. Then when you took a chance and confessed, you were turned down. But even if he doesn't feel the same way now, you can't give up yet. It hurt when you realized you weren't on the same page as him, but there's still time for him to catch up, right? 

You run into him after class, and he has to catch you before you stumble to the floor. It's a scene straight out of the kind of anime you love to watch. A sign for you to take another chance, except Minho speaks before you can. 

"No."

You haven't even said a word, and you’ve already been shot down. An arrow through your heart, but it seems cupid isn't on your side.

Are you that obvious? Could Minho read minds? Does he really not like you?

"What? I didn't even ask-"

"I won't go out with you."

Ah. Well. Minho hasn't told you that he doesn't like you, though you aren't sure if you could handle hearing those words straight from him. 

"That wasn't what I was going to say," you lie. Your voice is strained, and you can't meet his eyes, so maybe it's not believable. But you can't admit the truth, can you? "I wanted to ask if you had any movie recommendations." 

Minho raises an eyebrow. He's not fooled. Still he goes along with it and makes some suggestions. Not that you’re really paying attention to his words as much as how his voice sounds. 

Minho. It's always been Minho. 

And you were the constant in his life, at least until Heather showed up.

It's hard to admit that she might have stolen the role that was meant for you, but you can't move ahead without accepting that. 

Turns out Minho isn't just on a different page. The title of the book doesn't match either.

You are lost, clueless of what lies ahead. There's one thing you're certain of though.

Even if you’re disqualified as a heroine, your only hero is Minho. 

♡ season one guide

♡ next episode

♡ please leave a comment, reblog with tags or send an ask to let me know what you think!!

© 2024, stayinzencity

[problemswithbooks]

I'm not really a fan of Hawks losing his Quirk to AfO. If it serves any purpose it will probably be used to help Izuku fight AfO in the vestige realm which is a fight I was never looking forward to in the first place. Otherwise I don't think it really serves much purpose for Hawks as a character because we're at the end of the story and we just won't get a big focus on how it effects him going forward.

I mean, I see people saying that him losing his Quirk has set him free from the HPSC but he was essentially free from them after the first War. They have been non-existent in the story since than besides passing mentions. From what the reports said last chapter it seems that all the Heroes fighting are doing so of their own pure desire to help, not because the HPSC is paying them or anything. Keigo isn't working for them and given the world ending stakes if he wanted to do anything but beat AfO it'd be a negative trait, not him finding his freedom.

I know people want Keigo to find himself outside of being a Hero and his Quirk but that doesn't really seem to be a theme in the story. If Hori wanted to tell that story he could have done so with Mirio or All Might but he didn't. Instead Mirio was given his Quirk back with little fan fair and All Might's inspiration and Hero heart was reinforced. The story is about people being Heroes not about themselves as just people.

Which is honestly how I see things going with Hawks. His Quirk will be a force for good that helps Izuku beat AfO from the inside proving that despite his saying his Quirk was dirty, he really did/does have the heart of a Hero.

Also, I do think it takes real Hawks out of the story most likely, which is a bit disappointing, though understandable. I never really understood where people got the idea he was going to have a full mental break down anyway and besides him flipping out because he can't help anymore I still don't really see it happening. I mean, Hori is going at light speed here, why would he take the time to focus on Hawks having a mental break when he hasn't even managed to do that for his main three villains yet, who actually need that for the story to end.

I could easily be proven wrong given that Hori's writing is unpredictable, but for the moment my guess is that Hori did this so he could take Hawks out of the fight so he wouldn't get involved with the Todoroki or Ochako/Toga stuff, while also leaving open the possibility to give Izuku a strong ally in Hawks Quirk if needed.

I know people wanted him in those fights, but Hori has a hard time juggling characters in fight scenes, something we've seen a lot in this arc and the one prior. And to be honest he doesn't serve much purpose in them either. I've seen theories of wanting him try and kill Dabi and being devastated because Enji saves his son, essentially picking Touya over him, but Hawks has been nothing but positive about Enji trying to change and help his family. He didn't try and attack Touya or even mention him when he came through the portal, so don't know why he'd suddenly decide to attack him Quirk or not.

When it comes to Toga/Ochako thing he only complicates it. Yes, he killed Twice, but as we've seen Toga's main problem isn't that Twice was killed, it's that Izuku and Ochako, kids around her age don't like her. She feels like no one cares about her because she has a bad Quirk. If getting revenge for Twice was her main objective than she wouldn't have been crying. She doesn't even think about Hawks or name dropped him to my knowledge. If anything she treats all Heroes as guilty. To add Hawks into this fight draws attention away from Ochako, Toga and her main issue of identity. Plus, again I don't see Hawks being upset if Ochako saves Toga in the way he couldn't save Twice. He liked Twice and did try to save him. At most I think we'd see him watching with a happy smile and some tears, not having a full existential crisis.

[sicjimin]

8,11,12 with sope maybe???? Sick hobi just being sad and emotional bc he hates feeling bad? Just Yoongi being the best caretaker with lots of hugs for the sobbing sunshine

8. “How's the stomach?”

11. “Still nauseous?”

12. “You didn't sleep a wink, huh?”

Hoseok scrunched his face, shuddering, as his mouth opened wide, and mouthful of watery vomit splutters from his mouth. He spits, and then rest his head on the toilet seat—not really caring if it's dirty or not, as he pressed his palm against his churning stomach ; willing it to stop. He had thrown up a lot, maybe almost all of his dinner, but why the nausea hasn't eased up yet?

Hoseok hates this. He hates feeling horrible and .. he hates throwing up. He wants everything to stop, and he wan—

"Hoba .."

Hoseok lifts his head a bit—his teary eyes could make a blurry figure of his boyfriend trudge in to the bathroom. Sleepily rubbing his eyes with his hair still going haywire from sleep.

Hoseok sniffles, still not being able to make a verbal response as Yoongi sits beside him, and his hand touches Hoseok's sweaty back—rubbing it upside down.

"What's wrong?", Yoongi mumbles.

Hoseok pull himself away from the toilet, and let himself plops into the older chest, nuzzling into it. Yoongi peeks, gulping at the sight of vomit filling the toilet.

"Aigoo, you're sick, hm? How long have you been here?", he asks softly, carding his fingers through the younger long hair.

"Dunno ..", Hoseok finally opened his mouth, even though it's coming more like an inaudible mumbles. "Just .. feel dizzy .. and then feel like i'm going to puke" he breathes out. Recalling how he felt earlier, apparently bringing the same feeling back—as Hoseok feel nausea swells on his stomach again. He swallows thickly, shakily press his fist to his lips.

"You're not sleeping a wink, huh?"

"Mhm"

Yoongi hums. He tilts his head to get a better look of the rapper, caressing his teary cheeks, "And now? Still nauseous?"

Hoseok groans as he nods. He curls himself smaller and wrapped his arms around his middle harder. Yoongi's question makes the horrible feeling in his bofy more real.

Hoseok breathes out, parting his lips to help him inhale and exhale through nausea—easily ; unconciously tighten his grip around Yoongi's shirt, almost crumpling it, as he rides the wave. Yoongi just there—humming a low melody as he patiently rubs Hoseok's arms. Sometimes moving to patting his hair—until the comfortable silence breaks when Hoseok coughs, and moans as he peel himself away and ducked his head to the toilet again. " 'm going to puke", he mumbles through his pout.

Yoongi hums understandingly. He scoots closer and took Hoseok's hair that hanging low to his hand, snapping his hairtie that he hasn't take off—and tied it into a bun. "Let it out, Hoba .. you will feel better soon", he encourages.

Hoseok groans, feeling pessimistic about the last word. But he didn't get to argue or response as he burps, and immediately gurgling out vomit. He shivered at the awful taste. "That's it .. you're doing great"

Hoseok's breath hitched as another wave immediately hits him—he belches, his jaw almost like it's locked open as this time, his stomach pushes a bigger stream. Torrents of water mixed with bits of food that left in him spraying out to the bowl, some of it even gets out of his nose.

Hoseok hates this.

He coughs, shaking his head as he feels awful and disgusted. "Hyung ...", he chokes out a sob, panting.

Yoongi shushes him, wrapping his arms around the younger that now starts to crying in between every hiccups then and there as his stomach seems not finished yet. "Hoba .. hoba", he chants, "Hey .. it's okay. I know it's awful, but you will feel better after letting all out", he comforts.

Hoseok shakes his head, "No .. i've been here for hours and not feeling better yet"

"I know .. but i'm here", Yoongi murmurs softly, "I will take care of you. I will make you chamomile tea that you love and i have this medicine for stomachache .. it will help. How does it sound?"

Hoseok shuts his eyes, straightening his body as he chokes with a new gag, more of bile and water trickles from his lips before he could respond to his hyung. He left dry heaving for a while, before he's sure the nausea has subsided a bit.

"I don't think i can stomach anything", he mumbles tiredly, slumping himself against Yoongi's after he flushed the toilet. "But the tea sounds nice", he rasps.

"Okay", Yoongi softly says, "Can you move now? How's the stomach? Is it done?", he asks once again, wanting to make sure—afraid that if he brings him to move, it will jostles everything.

Hoseok nods, puffing his cheeks as he let himself guided to go back to the bed. "Hyung ..", he croakes out, "Can you bring the trashcan here? just in case"

Yoongi nods, ruffling his head. He tucks the younger first before he jogs around, "I will prepare the tea and medicine, okay?"

[yanderecandystore]

Could we get some more Male Beldam plz, a crumb of spider boi affection 🥺💖

Hello dearest! Sorry for the long wait, I was having an awful time trying to make this last chapter work. Also btw:

I messed up the story and now this isn't the last final chapter of the series 🤡 I told y'all I get too invested and too complicated with this shit-

So YEAH we're having ANOTHER ONE later on- That will be the true final chapter (depending on how this one goes, I ain't too confident-).

I made some HEAVY DECISIONS LOL-

This is going to be a lot different from my usual work (I think?) And a disclaimer:

I don't believe that the actions of the characters in my writing are valid or even morally correct, I write for yanderes because I'm extremely weird (I'm trying to accept that) but I don't support these actions in real life, I just like them in the media. BTW this is not an accurate representation of trauma/mental illness/or even anyone in general!

(Chp. 1) (Chp. 2) (Chp. 3)

TW/Tags: Following up from (Chp.2) // also if y'all want, there is this headcanon→ (🧵⚫🕷️) // manipulation // heavy angst // mentions of vomit // cursing // kinda edgy // characters death (I'm so sorry-) // mentions of death/gore (won't really detail it cause I'm horrible at it) // identity theft/pretending to be someone else // mental breakdown/guilty mindset

6,471 words!

Stitched Together (Chp.3) [Yandere!M!Beldam OC(?) x F!Reader - Fanfiction]:

A house filled with disfuncional people. Were they always like this, or did they become "this" when they first came here? Who knows.

People have their own struggles, we're always dealing with some kind of problem- Even the smaller ones. We all have different ways of dealing with them, of course. It's life, it's natural. Yet it's still pretty surprising how all these people got to know each other and form some kind of bond.

It's a weird friendship, but it's not necessarily a bad one, or -more accurately- it didn't used to be one.

Your roommates had a lot of issues, some of which you didn't even know off. It is very entertaining seeing how much they struggle with the most ridiculous problems with the easiest solutions.

Communication seems to be the heart of all their problems, and even he, a cold arachnid monster who eats the "love" of naive people, could see right through their flaws- And he hasn't talked with anyone in ages!

Other Dominick, or just "Dominick" now, has been enjoying this disfuncional group antics way too much, to the point he has actually developed some kind of- Feelings, towards you and your roommates. You're almost as pitiful as you are loveable, it's no secret why that other man couldn't stop obsessing over you for twelve long years, if only he could be a bit more honest though- Maybe he would have won your heart back, maybe you wouldn't be sleeping in a fabricated dimension with a hungry monster.

Cause that's all he is! A monster, that's all he'll ever be, he knows that now.

Still, this whole "he is my ex best friend" drama sure strikes a nerve, the truth is so obvious that it's honestly infuriating to hear you talk about that guy as a "friend". "Dominick" can't blame you though- Maybe you are just not accustomed to differentiating friends from lovers, especially considering how lonely you were.

The mice have told him so many juicy details about you and your roommates lives that he can basically read every single one of you like the palm of his hand. And seeing you four have such a hard time understanding each other was like a never ending soap opera drama.

Vivian was a nerdy girl "trying to break free" by acting like a complete airhead and believing that having fun is something only possible by partying and ignoring her anxious mind.

Richard is extremely dependent on Vivian, being his only friend for so long has made him believe he has more romantic than friendly feelings for her.

Dominick used to be a frail, easily sick boy who grew up without his "best friend" by his side to be able to protect his clingy self, and seeing how you never even talked to him in twelve years- he has fully believed he has done something wrong to make you despise him. He became a physically strong man, but his weak spot has always been you.

And you, oh, dearest you! You're so anxious and worried about building and maintaining relationships that you started to overthink their actions to the point it has led you to Other Dominick's arms! Dearest, it's true your friends have been neglecting you, but if only you knew how it wasn't their intention at all.

Even so, "Dominick" couldn't deny the fact he did fall for you in these last couple of weeks, this "feeling" has been growing on him like a parasite ever since you started wanting to be here more often, to see him more often and to top it all off: You asked him to let you sleep in his web, you asked him to not bring you back home.

What is normally a silent cold void of pure nothingness there was now the low sound of breathing and occasionally snoring. There was now warm, there was now something else aside from him and that little rodent he genuinely loves. It still takes him by surprise how you just invited yourself to this realm and doesn't seem to want to go back, it still surprises him that you left all those people in the Pink Palace just for him.

How absurd, right? You were so willing to escape your reality that you were now sleeping and cuddling with a monster. Granted that you don't seem to know how bad he truly is…. The other people he had preyed on were a lot more careful than you, yet they all still failed to survive in the end. You could say ignorance is a blessing if you have managed to survive so far by being naive.

You have stayed for the night in the Other World, having a wonderful sleep holding the person you seem to have fallen in love with. However, "Dominick" hasn't anticipated the amount of time you two would have spent sleeping together, due to the amount of energy he lost trying to create the perfect fantasy for you he has completely blacked out for what feels to be days.

He isn't sure what day it is, or what time it is, but he was sure both of you had slept for quite a while, maybe it had something to do with the nature of this realm that made you "hibernate" for as long as he did.

There was only one option if he wanted to make you live with him forever, to be able to indulge himself in this love for as long as you live- Yet he wasn't sure if you would agree with his terms for staying, that being never leaving, of course- And possibly having to see him carnage the body of others so he can feast on it.

And speaking of food, of course you would be starving after such a long sleep. He wasn't sure what time it was, breakfast? Dinner? Time almost doesn't matter when you're essentially immortal.

There isn't anything to eat here really, not while he is this exhausted, he can't make anything for you at the moment even if he really wanted to.

"- I hope you had a decent sleep, I bet that sleeping in a place like this may not be- The most comfortable of beds." He commented while looking around the web he called home. He doesn't even remember when was the last time he was able to sleep in a proper bed without feeling out of place. This web is just a lot more comforting to him.

"- … Well I think it was worth it. Though I'm not accustomed to sleeping in webs, or with someone else for that matter." Joking tiredly you responded to his almost self deprecating comment.

You have almost forgotten you slept holding him, and you almost have forgotten how his looks are still a little frightening- Waking up and looking at him sure is a fun way to get enough energy for the rest of the day, thankfully due to his own exhaustion he hasn't noticed your small expression of fear and surprise.

"- You're hungry." Was all he said. While you were still sleeping he could hear noises coming from your stomach, he isn't sure how he can fix this yet.

"- A bit- I assume you also haven't eaten yet? Sorry if it sounds harsh, but you look like you haven't eaten all night." Putting it bluntly like that could harm anyone's ego, but it was true that he hasn't eaten anything in years, waiting people to move in to the Pink Palace is both tedious and a almost unfruitful process, and as you can see he is too pathetic to kill every single one of his preys, despite how easy it would be to just do so right now.

But maybe, it doesn't have to be this way, maybe he could still work something out, you don't have to die to sustain him-

"- Can I help you this time? You have done so much during this time I've been here, I would like to do something for you for once." You were so sincere, and it was true that people have been cooking for you a lot these past days, mostly Other Dominick and…. Well, Dominick, once.

Just remembering yesterday makes you feel odd, as if you have left something behind- Wait, didn't you have plans to hangout with him and the others today?

"- Well- You can help me with something…" What would normally be a very easy thought process, was now taking him ages to complete- He hasn't completely finished his plan mentally, yet it was the only option left. In this state he is too soft, too dependent, he can't feed you or take care of you without first satisfying his own needs.

"- We don't have a kitchen anymore, I'm sorry if this is a selfish request- But could you please get us some food from your house?" He just needed an excuse, any excuse.

"- Hmm, sure! But- But why can't you just build a new one?" You questioned him, still not sure how his "powers" work or not work.

"- I can't, I can't right now- I'm starving." He wasn't lying really, but he did exaggerate it a bit to see if you could go faster.

"- I'm so sorry! I'll be back okay? Just hang in there." And being naive as you were, you made sure to crawl your way back to the little door you've come from, taking just another look at his bottom eyes and sending him a tender smile one last time.

You'll be back soon, he is sure you will.

You won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die, you won't have to die-

- But they will.

While crawling through the tunnel you realized how tight it felt, you knew you didn't fit exactly well here but this time it feels almost suffocatingly small. You don't know if this has anything to do with "Dominick" or not, but it was as if the whole tunnel was trying to squeeze you back to where you came from.

You're not sure what you should do in this scenario since he said there was no more kitchen back there, should you prepare something in your own kitchen and then bring it back? Or maybe you should just bring a snack to make him feel slightly more filled?

Whatever your plan was, you knew you would be able to fix something quick for him- And probably for yourself since you do feel awfully empty right now, and honestly your body hurts from sleeping in one position the whole entire time, especially on top of someone else.

You hope he was okay, it would be really embarrassing if he was also having body aches because of you, if you could give him something it would be a proper bed- Screw spiderwebs.

For some reason, you felt as if you took longer to crawl back to the Pink Palace than what you normally take- Maybe it was just your imagination, after all you did get to reach the end eventually. While still feeling your whole body weak and aching you got up from the tunnel feeling a bit dizzy, still your mind was focused on two things: Food and roommates.

It would be more appropriate for you to say "hi" or "good morning" right? It feels wrong cooking and then leaving them again without saying anything, maybe- No, no you couldn't, if you did…

Could you… Perhaps- Be able to tell them about the Other Pink Palace??

The idea sounds absolutely ridiculous, especially when you consider that they would probably not believe in you in the first place. Why did you even consider that option? What would you even tell them- "Hey I met like- A spider version of Dominick and a fake version of all of you and I hmmm kinda slept there over the night??" God, they would either think you're trying to prank them or that you went crazy!

Speaking of them- Where are they? It's still 6 am when you look at the clock in the living room. Normally Vivian and Richard would be awake by now, Dominick especially since he likes to exercise during the morning. Damn, you're the only one that wakes up late, huh?

Oh… Yeah… They're probably hanging out with one of their actual friends, how could you even forget that, right?

" They probably didn't even remember to warn me or something, not that it would matter since… I wasn't here in the first place." You thought, feeling a bit sad at the lack of your roommate's presence around the house. Maybe you should try talking with them whenever they come back, you can't keep leaving them and then expect them to call you to go out with them, right?

Maybe it's the loneliness creeping in, but you start to think that maybe you should apologize for your lack of presence around the house, and try to be open about how you really feel about them- Otherwise none of you would be able to survive at least an year together.

Yeah, you'll talk to them soon enough- You'll make something for "Dominick" and then tell him you'll be back soon, you'll send them a message saying you need to talk and then you'll open up to them and hopefully they'll still want to watch some movies together. Sounds like a good plan.

There is of course, only one problem:

"- W- What?! Why is everything spoiled already?? Who would even buy so many perishables and leave them on the counter? Goddamnit-" The smell of rotten food had invaded your nostrils like a punch to the face when you came back to the kitchen, after not finding anyone around the house.

They left the groceries on the counter and just- Ditched?? Who would do such a thing?? Why did no one put anything in the fridge and why was it all spoiled already?? Great, you have to buy more food now, unbelievable.

You would tell Other Dominick about this, but you're worried that if you take too long he'll keep starving- And besides, you're too disappointed with your roommates to think straight about this. You got ready, picked up your purse and stormed out of the house hoping you could buy something to make for "Dominick".

On the other side of this whole fiasco was Dominick, the real one, that is. He has been staying inside Sam's house with Vivian and Richard since you left, it's been the most long fourteen days of their lives.

Hmm? Why do you ask? Well- Maybe it's the fact you suddenly disappeared out of thin air like you were never there to begin with?! After that morning when he made you breakfast, he decided to have his own talk with the other two to see if they could all reach an agreement- They agreed with having the movie night like you suggested and they were willing to talk about the past few weeks when they neglected not only you and Dominick about also their own studies and responsibilities inside the Pink Palace.

You told him you wouldn't be there that day, which was fine, he was actually kinda glad to know you would be able to take some fresh air and not be stuck with only them for company, he thought it was just natural for you to want to do your own thing and didn't even question you where you were going. He thought you would come back later that day or maybe on the next day.

Oh but he was so wrong, so very wrong.

You didn't show up for two weeks straight. You didn't answer any calls or messages for two weeks straight. No one has seen you around, in two weeks straight. For some reason rats have been tearing up the house more frequently for two weeks straight.

At night time they could hear sounds coming from the living room and the kitchen. Every time someone would check it out, they would see nothing there except the small door on the wall being open. There was nothing behind it, only a brick unfinished wall. Someone would try to lock it up, but they couldn't find the key so they would just block it until they could find it.

For fourteen nights, that door would be back open again- Somehow the objects that were positioned to close it, would find themselves back in place.

And still, you weren't anywhere near them. No one has seen you around town, none of your neighbors could say they saw you when you left and which way you went and your family hasn't heard of you since then. They were starting to lose their minds.

Vivian, Richard and Dominick started to feel unsafe inside the Pink Palace after the tenth day. Richard was extremely superstitious, and the presence of the rats and that little creepy door were really obvious signs that something was wrong with that place, and in his mind, that something was related to you somehow.

Vivian, however, was now a nervous wreck, not only was she worried sick about you she also felt guilty in your disappearance. The confident girl has returned to her old anxious self, worrying that maybe the worst could have happened to you because of her neglect.

Dominick couldn't stand seeing them like this, so he suggested they spent the night somewhere else. One night became four, and still no sight of you, they told some town's folk to call them whenever they see you, and to warn you that they miss you dearly. Everyone misses you, especially him.

All options left for why you have suddenly disappeared ranged from bad to awful- From "maybe you got lost somewhere outside town" to "maybe you just didn't want to come back at all".

Or worse….

Maybe you were dead, and were now hunting the last place you've been through.

No! No, he couldn't think that way! None of them could… You were coming home soon, he knew that! He was sure of it…

He- He just couldn't bear the thought of you gone, of you actually really gone!

Both Richard and Vivian couldn't muster enough courage to be able to go back to the Pink Palace but Dominick knew he had to go back to see if maybe you have come back, if maybe there would be some hint to where you were, and how you were…

"- I'll be back soon, until then tell Sam I went to the Pink Palace to see if she comes back, okay? Stay safe you two." He told them goodbye before going out, after all both of them were still not accustomed with this sort of thing.

When he got home he saw that the door was open.

"- [Y/n]? [Y/N]!? ARE YOU THERE?" He came inside screaming his lungs out without considering the various possibilities as to why the door was open. I mean- Yes, the door could be open because of you.

"- [Y/N], IT'S ME, DOMINICK!" But what if it was a burglar that had entered inside to steal something...

"- PLEASE ANSWER ME!!" Or maybe they didn't lock the doors on their way out, maybe due to some animal or a strong wind, the door was now open…

"- [Y/n]..?" Or maybe… It was a trap.

"- How… How did-" He was speechless, not only because of the amount of screaming and running he did throughout the house, but also due to the scenery in front of him-

That little, pesky tiny door was open again. No surprises so far, but what really got him was the creepy, spider web filled, dark tunnel behind it.

" Since when was this here??" He thought, as he started to investigate the tiny door and the eerie air coming from the other side. Richard wasn't kidding when he said this place had some creepy shit going on, did- Did you have anything to do with this??

"- Do I… Fit in?" He wondered, the crazy man. No one would ever think about entering such an awfully tight place, with some more than suspicious vibes to it, when your friend has literally gone missing and was probably involved with some sort of occult-ish phenomenon.

But if this could actually help him find you, he was ready to do anything to be able to reach the truth, and he was desperate enough to go inside this hellhole if it meant this nightmare could end.

Again- He didn't consider the dangers of his uncalculated actions, despite the glaring red signs everywhere, he crawled down the creepy yet- Oddly magical tunnel, seeing light on the end of the darkness. Unfortunately, he probably couldn't have predicted what type of monster would be waiting for him.

"- Dominick?" Someone calls him from the other side, something about their voice is both familiar yet eerily different.

"- Are you there?" Was it you?? Was it really you calling for him on the other side?? It- It looked like you, despite how dark this place is and how far away you were.

"- What the Hell are you doing here??! I'm- I'm coming okay? Stay there-" Dominick was bewildered by the circumstances of actually seeing you at the end of the tunnel- This is almost so unreal that he wonders for a second if he is even fully awake. As wonderful as this moment is, he still feels like something isn't right, he still feels like something is missing out of this puzzle, he continues to crawl but now he is cautious of getting close to you.

Keeping you alive really did benefit him in the end, intentionally or not, these circumstances seem to be the most favorable. After a good rest, he found that maybe he had at least some amount of energy left, at least barely enough to keep one last charade.

" Perdón, love, but I must use your beautiful image, just this once." This is not exactly how he planned it, if anything, trying to look like you just to trick that guy seems a bit evasive- For the first time he isn't sure if he should really use someone else's appearance to trap another person.

He can transform himself to look like whoever he wants, but because of the current situation his appearance feels more like a mockery of your figure rather than an actual adaptation, like he did with Dominick.

However, now that he was here, Other Dominick would be able to eat from someone's "love", although- Ugh, this "love" sure doesn't sound appetizing, your Dominick's love is going to be the worst thing he ate in a long while, isn't it?

It's not as pure and sweet as yours, it is drenched in doubts and unresolved issues. Self loathe mixed with regret, he did yell at you recently, hasn't he? He sure smells like a coward, not to mention how awkward this situation is.

Think of it from his perspective: He is going to eat the love that is not directed towards him- Like all his other victims- But rather, love that is directed towards you. Other Dominick is planning on eating the heart of the one who wants your heart! It's a bit gross for him.

"- Dominick! Please help, I'm over here!" This is… Probably the first time he felt like vomiting while acting, but his stomach is empty so at least there won't be a mess anywhere.

Having to interpret you like this, especially without your knowledge feels so disgusting but he hopes you'll understand he did this out of necessity. He needs this man's heart, soul and mind, anything except hurting you, he is already too attached to you to see life fade away from your body. At least you won't be here to see him do it, that would be unpleasant.

"- [Y/n]! Why- What- What's going on?? Where were you?? What the Hell is this place-" Dominick was obviously holding a lot of questions in his mind, after all the fuck is he looking at? An empty void with only "you" here, you've been gone for so long yet somehow you were inside the house all this time??

Or more like "the empty hell-looking dimension inside the house".

It didn't take long to get to end of the tunnel, finally he got close enough-

"- I- I was so scared, Dominick-" Other Dominick tried securing Dominick on a deadly last embrace so he could do this whole process faster, but for a second, Dominick could catch the difference in voice tone, and pushed himself out of his grip.

"- W-Who- What are you? WHERE 'S [Y/N]?!" He trembled when he noticed it's eyes- The monster, whatever that thing was, the person trying to imitate you had button eyes. On closer inspection, it looked- Nothing like you, nothing at all like you! It was as if your face had been stretched out and redrawn by a horror cartoonist, whatever color your skin once had was too pale to resemble something living- And your hair- How could he forget how your hair looked??

Sure, it was the same hairstyle (barely-) but the texture, the color- Even if you did share similar traits, it just looks off! There was no other way to say it, this wasn't you at all!

"- ANSWER ME! WHERE IS SHE?!" Dominick shouted his lungs out despite his voice coming out a bit horse and mild if not completely pathetic due to his previous shouting inside the Pink Palace, this creature was threatening to come closer and he couldn't let his guard down-

He wasn't prepared at all, but he couldn't let this THING know that.

"- Oh. Well, I don't see the point in continuing this- Thank you for making it easier for me." Transforming and keeping a form is not only physically stressful, it takes a lot of mental power to not constantly have an identity crisis over these little "acting sessions".

Still, even if he could be himself, who would that be? Are they still inside of him or have they long been dead?

Whoever was left now was tall, moody, monstrous and skinnier than a toothpick. He's seen better days… maybe..?

"- Please refrain from screaming, that is absolutely the worst part and I have a headache." Headaches are the absolute worst, even to someone like him- Especially someone like him!

"- OH! REALLY?! I'm sorry, your HIGHNESS! I didn't know- u-GH!" Dominick tried to taunt the monster but all it did was earn him a slap from the creature's sharp claw hands and to be tripped over effortlessly.

"- You did that on purpose, I'm almost surprised." The man sat himself on top of the pathetic man on the ground, using his back as a support, completely humiliating the human who once thought he was now storing enough to handle this sort of confrontation.

Despite Other Dominick's appearance, his REAL appearance, that is, his way of dealing with rude "quests" was firm and elegant in a way, slapping the young man in an old fashioned way.

"- Fuck off me- You didn't even answer me-" Dominick tried to sound as tough as he could, and tried to struggled out of this position- But found his attempts to be fruitless.

"- I mean, why would I? You enter my house, you yell at me, you threaten me, I think I'm not in the wrong to do this." This was the way he would normally deal with- "Rude quests", try to mess with them. Poke, poke, and poke until they manage to fall off.

"- … You're kidding me? You LURED ME IN! You tricked me by looking like my friend, which by the way- WHERE IS SHE?!" Oh, how heroic of him! His heart beats faster whenever your name is mentioned, pumping determination down his veins, how cliche.

How… Annoying.

"- I gave you one condition and you choose to not listen, no wonder she left you- What made you think I would give you that answer?" He was being serious by the way, Other Dominick hates yelling.

"- L- What are you- What did you do to her?" Dominick whispered as if he was speaking with himself and wondering what could have happened to you in this- Fiend's hands!

"- … Hmm- Not treat her unfairly? Not pretend that me being weak was entirely her fault, not blaming twelve years of loneliness on her and only her and not taking a SMIDGEN of responsibility for my lack of social skills? Not tell her she is an awful friend because of something that happened so long ago-" Other Dominick kept teased, proud of how easily he could list off the things he DIDN'T do wrong with you, he would never have treated you this way.

"- How do you know all of this-" Dominick was shut down immediately- The monster was having fun poking him until he would fall and break.

"- Shhh, wait I got more- Be there for her when she needed, gave her comfort and care while you three were having a lot of fun without her- Leaving her to wonder to a trap like a naive little butterfly-"

"- YOU were the one to set the trap in the first place! I know what I did was unfair, I know I shouldn't treat her like that for something that happened when we were kids, but I didn't mean to hurt her- YOU DID! You tried to hurt her from the very beginning, didn't you?!" Ouch. The human managed to touch the monster's ego, a subtle yet extremely painful stab in the heart.

He was taken back by this, he stayed silent thinking about his moral ground on this petty competition.

"- You DID! You stalked us and preyed on our insecurities, you're the reason she is missing! Tell me where she is or I swear to God." The wounds didn't stop coming, Dominick was now the one pushing his buttons.

"- … Can you blame a spider for setting it's web? Longing for a prey to stick it's pretty little wings on its strings? I'm only doing what my nature tells me to do." Despite it being true, Other Dominick didn't feel proud of this notion, nor did he feel like he won this battle at all.

He tried to poke him, but ended up being the one left broken over their own guilty mind.

"- Y- You couldn't- You…" At least he still believed he would be capable of hurting you, and even if that was a lie…

"- Eat her?" It would still benefit in the end, right?

"- …" No words, only a shocked expression turning from fear and disgust to pure hatred. He expected him to say a bunch of things, horrible things, anything except that!

How could someone eat another person? Unless that someone was twisted or not human at all… In Dominick's mind, that guy was both.

Ya know, hate is not really the opposite of love, it affects us in almost the same ways love affects us- Love and hate are easy to get mixed up in this horrible world we live in, so even if he couldn't take Dominick's heart by love, he could still take it by hate.

Hatred towards him. A hateful heart would be a first for his taste, but hopefully it isn't as nasty as it sounds.

To the last breath, he fought, he did the best he could, blinded by rage, hate and love, your old childhood friend was now gone. He didn't go down without hurting his opponent, no, quite the contrary-

Dominick had made sure to rip his buttons out, making Other Dominick blind while also getting rid of the buttons so he wouldn't be able to find them later. Unfortunately, he died believing that somehow, he would see you again soon, as he didn't know you were actually alive and were just on your way back home- As a bunch of townsfolk managed to recognize you and warn you about not only the time you've spent missing, but how worried sick your roommates were.

In the end, the lonely spider did get to fill their stomach and still protect the one thing it cared about, but to what end? He was right, he was a monster, eating on the flesh of someone who you care a lot about, you would never be happy here knowing how dangerous he is for you, and for others around you.

Your silence seems to confirm his suspicion.

"- I know you're there. I heard you coming through the door, and I felt you standing there for a while now."

"- !…"

"- I can… Feel your hesitation. I didn't get enough time to get rid of the mess, I-I can't actually see now, thanks to your "friend", so I can only imagine how awful it must look to you."

"- …"

"- I'm sorry for making you see this, especially it being him… I tried- I tried to…. It looks awful doesn't it? His face is probably really messed up, I thought that maybe you wouldn't recognize him."

"- But you know it's him, don't you? Who else would- Come here and try to be your savior? Your knight in shining armor…"

"- …"

"- That makes me a villain, doesn't it?"

"- A-actually you don't need to… Answer that. I always knew I was one, I just liked to pretend I wasn't… I don't remember since when I've been doing this, but I've been doing it enough to forget who I used to be."

"- …?"

"- The truth is nothing makes me feel satisfied except- Well, this. This- Horrible thing, that I probably shouldn't be- showing it to you-"

"- …-"

"- Please don't- Feel pity for me, I wouldn't accept that. You knew something was wrong with me from the start but I kept lying to you pretending this wouldn't be… This wouldn't be your end."

"- I have told myself that this wouldn't be you"

"- !!"

"- W-WAIT! I-I know you're going away- Just- I-"

…..

"- ….. She is gone…. That's… That was a great decision."

You decided to run away, you stayed still watching that awfully brutal scene for way too long, you were frozen in place before he said something along the lines of "this could have been you"- And that was all the motivation you needed to get out of there.

However, your mind couldn't stop coming back to the body of your old friend, the body that was-

You- You can't stop thinking about it! You want to scream but you just can't- You locked his door while crawling back to the Pink Palace, the tunnel seemed a lot more tight and nauseatingly longer than last time- You could feel the walls moving but you considered that maybe that was just your terrified mind.

Your body told you to escape as fast as you could, but your mind told you to go back and- And see your dead friend again, to try to get him back despite the fact that would not be possible.

The moment you got that, all you saw was red, Dominick and that monster with him- Even without the buttons you could tell he didn't have the guts to look you in the eyes.

How did this happen? Why didn't you see it coming sooner??

What- Why did you trust him?? A complete stranger from a POCKET DIMENSION INSIDE YOUR HOUSE??

WHY-

If-

" This is my fault, this is my fault, this is my fault-"

You kept replaying that scene inside your head, over and over and over again- Feeling guilty for everything you've done wrong in these past few weeks.

You trusted a monster, and now your friend is dead. You trusted a monster and now your roommates are worries as fuck about you and you can't even explain what the Hell happened to you in all of this time.

You fell for a monster that was planning on taking you out as well as Dominick.

You couldn't handle this- You can't handle this!!

You sat on the front porch crying your eyes out, not having enough strength to pull yourself out of this twisted place. A part of you was hoping that the heavy knocking from the inside meant that he was coming- And that it meant you would be gone along with your crimes.

The other part was terrified to the very soul of that possibility even happening, so when you saw the police car come by with your roommates wondering what happened and why was Dominick gone for so long- You were both relieved and worried as fuck as to how the Hell would you explain what just happened.

" The man on the other side of the door ate him?? " Was absolutely ridiculous and in no way in Hell would anyone believe you-

"- It's my fault! Pl- Please!! I did it!! TAKE ME AWAY PLEASE-" You pleaded to be taken away while crying your eyes out, despite no one's understanding of the situation you've sat there hoping they would take you far away from here.

The banging inside the house only got louder, and for once in all of these days you were worried if you actually did lock the door or not.

The policemen heard the loud banging and decided to investigate. You were being comforted by your roommates who were happy to see you but extremely worried about what happened to you and why you were mumbling nonsense. One of the policemen was trying to ask you questions but it was clear your mind wasn't in the right place at the moment, the other was investigating the sound.

All he found was blood coming from underneath a tiny door, and the key you left behind in a hurry. He thought it would be a good idea to unlock it.

There was nothing there. Just blood.

But hopefully it would be good enough for the investigation.

The local police department was already aware of the weird disappearances that happened every year in this very house, so they already had a suspicion that this wouldn't be the fault of some random young adults that decided to move here. Sure, it was scummy for them to use your group as bait, but they needed something to be able to resolve the mystery involving this house.

And you survived whatever happened here, and you clearly knew things they would love to know about- Of course, on a better time than this.

It's clear you're fragile at the moment and that you'll need sometime to recover, and besides-

There is this weird feeling of someone watching them as they take samples of the blood.

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

🦉Owl Tag Delivery to🧺:

// @radbarbariancupcake //

I want to personally apologize to everyone who has been enjoying these series because of spider boy softness, I made him a monster and I'm sorry, but that doesn't mean I can't make him soft on future Headcanons! I would very much appreciate it cause I made myself sad doing this 😭🤡

🍭꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍰꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖♡🍮꒰⑅ᵕ༚ᵕ꒱˖🍭

[choibinn3]

GET IT TOGETHER, JUNGWON!!

[ four. O_o Yang Jungwonnie ]

series masterlist

⋆·˚ ༘ * in which jungwon had meant for that love letter to go to yeri, and not you—her bff. for some reason though, he finds that with each moment he spends together with you he's closer and closer to forgetting all about that damn letter.

luv note - chloe moriondo

WRITTEN PORTION. 1.9k words

btw remember that second hand embarrassment tag?? yeahh....

ps. this is bad, very, very bad and cheesy so be warned (its meant to be, but youll still feel pain lol)

—

student council room.

Jungwon could feel his hands clamming up, but he instead urged himself to just swallow down his nerves. For the past week he thought the biggest worry he had was his parents and Student Council work.

Not potentially losing friendships and breaking your heart.

"Jungwon? Are you still there?" your voice asked. It was slightly muffled by the door, but still distinct. "I had to tell Hyuka to go back without me."

You, he remembered. He had to fix this. He had known you since you were both in kindergarten, incidentally somehow being in the same classes up until High School. Still, he didn't know you though.

You were closer than acquaintances, maybe a little less than friends, and definitely not more than people with mutual friends. With everything that had been happening since the Student Council election, he had assumed he'd get closer to you naturally. It just never happened though, but he enjoyed your company when he could.

Yeri on the other hand, he was connected with. Being both Student Council President and Vice President meant they worked together often, and he found himself being drawn to her sweetness. He enjoyed their dynamic and their current friendship.

The way they worked complemented each other, and she always found a way to make him smile—it seemed as though her kindness and generosity knew no bounds. Plus, she related to him in a way none of his other friends did.

Late, after class and after hours, they'd both talk casually while doing paperwork. Jungwon's parents were hardheaded and stubborn people, wanting the best for him and yet stressing him out. They were the whole reason he ran for President in the first place.

He couldn't find it in himself to hate them though.

Yeri was the same, and she supported him throughout all the difficult times he went through because of them. She was soft, so level headed, fiercely loyal, and unbelievably pretty.

They had been partners and friends for a little over a month, and Jungwon was sure he wanted to at least try with her. It was young, new and unfurling feelings, it was something he wanted to find out.

Your energetic personality was charming, but that was all it was. It didn't strike his heart in any particular way. Jungwon was almost 100% sure there was no way Yeri would ever date him after this, but he needed to prioritize your feelings currently.

He just hoped Yeri and him could still be friends afterwards though—because being a liar was the one thing Jungwon wasn't.

"Yeah," he called out, "still here. You can just come back in now."

He watched as you nervously peeled back the sliding door of the clubroom, inching inside to peer at him. You walked closer to stand in front of him, and Jungwon smiled in hopes of easing your anxiousness.

You threw one back, although a bit hesitantly. "Jungwon," you started, twiddling with your fingers. He simply watched—wanting to at least let you talk a bit. Crushing your feelings now would be nothing but brutal. "Honestly, I was really surprised with the letter. Do you... remember back in 3rd grade?"

"No? I'm sorry, I'm not good with memories from Elementary School," the doe-eyed boy replied. He was telling the truth, grade school felt like ages ago and he just hasn't had the time to reminisce on childhood memories.

You held your hands up in a defensive manner. "That's fine! Um, you like... Uhh, how do I say this..." You made gestures with your figures, hoping to convey it to him in one way or another. God, this was dumb.

Jungwon observed silently as you laughed at your own stuttering. Endearing, came to mind. That was cute.

In the Council Room and in class, you were always particularly enthusiastic and excitable. Seeing you bashful was a very different side of you for the black-haired boy.

"I sent you my own love letter once. Like, a long, long time ago, and you sort of rejected me? I think."

"You think?" The boy held back a laugh, but quickly composed himself. He wasn't laughing maliciously, just... how could you be unsure of such a thing? "I'm sorry, but I still don't remember."

"Yeah, that's fine!" You nodded, embarrassed from his almost-chuckle. You did not want to seem like an idiot in front of him today. "Actually, I don't remember much either, but you didn't reply to it."

Jungwon gazed at your brows furrowed from trying to think of more words to say, and suddenly he felt a tonne of guilt fall onto him. His expression grew solemn.

Quick, get it over with, before this would get any worse.

"Look, YN—"

He had to shut his mouth almost immediately.

"What I'm trying to say is—!" You took a deep breath. "I've liked you since then! Since years, and years ago," you finally blurted, closing your eyes as to not see his reaction.

"You're the only one I've ever felt this way towards. I thought once I grew up this warmth would just... go away, but it hasn't and I don't think it will. I was honestly going to just swallow it all down hoping I'd get over it before we graduate, but I couldn't. My feelings were overflowing—I just found myself finding more things about I liked about you instead."

Your goal today was to not embarrass yourself, but to hastily tell him you liked him too before sprinting away. It seemed as though nothing was going to plan so far, for neither of you, actually.

Jungwon was left unable to speak from your surprising declaration. You took that as a sign to continue. Whatever happened next was something for future you to panic over.

"I like your dimples, that smile you make when you're passing by strangers in the hallway, and the way your hair falls when you comb through it. You're admirable in everything you do, truly. The way you help underclassmen, the way you always make sure to assist teachers during your free periods, and how you never seem to complain or get frustrated when we make mistakes."

You had nurtured your feelings for what felt like forever. Even when you were technically rejected back then, and even now. At first, you thought that he would be a passing crush from when you were a kid—but he wasn't. He grew into his own so much so that you found yourself admiring his leadership, compassion and thoughtfulness with each day you watched him.

"I like how mature you are, how you still find the time to care for your friends even with Student Council work, the natural way you light up any room you walk into, how I could honestly hear your voice talk for hours on end, how even though we haven't spoken much you still remember my favorite color from when I told you during introductions, I'm rambling gahh, just—all of it! I like all of it, everything about you!"

Everyday of harboring your secret affections for the boy consisted of soft glances during his speeches, wishes to be able to encase his hand within yours to interlock your fingers under the table during meetings, and wantings to be more than what you were to him. It was alright for a while, but it had started to become painful.

All crushes are painful, you told yourself in 5th grade, watching him start to receive confessions from your classmates.

"—I like you! I've liked you since the 3rd grade, and so I accept! I really, really want to be with you Yang Jungwon. Please take care of me!"

They were all painful, but you were given the chance to make yours not. To make your feelings real and acknowledged, to bare yourself in front of him like a vivisection—and you were taking it. Even when you were practically trembling from the embarrassment.

Jungwon was stilled from the shock. Heeseung had already told him of your long held feelings, but hearing it from your mouth while you had your eyes shut tight made him flustered.

How were you able to do that so shamelessly? To be so vulnerable and weak in front of someone? He had to write a whole letter, albeit a bit poorly, and somehow you were able to say it all.

He's received confessions before, felt those kind of feelings, but he wouldn't have been able to yell out those sort of things ever—no matter how strong his feelings were. You were dangerously bold, he thought.

Bold enough to send a bright heat to overtake his cheeks.

You looked up finally after mustering enough courage from his lack of speaking, only to find yourself blinking at a red-faced Jungwon. Oh my God, he's blushing...! YOU did that.

The both of you stood there for a while, thinking the same thought of what is even happening? Is this real, or have I just been in a daze for the past few days? Jungwon's eyes were comically wide and his mouth was gaping, but he couldn't find it in himself to close it.

The thought made you gain confidence all of a sudden, finding the opportunity to do something you had always wanted to do. Quickly and stealthily, you went onto your tippy toes—

and kissed him on the cheek.

Jungwon felt your lips on the smooth expanse of his skin, and smelt your scent from the intimate proximity. It was a chaste gesture, almost no where close to his lips at all, but he heard his heart beating against his ribcage nonetheless. It thrummed in his ears like a drum, and he wanted to whisper for it to stop.

For it to not be swayed so easily.

It was the innocence of such a thing that got to him. Not once had Jungwon held hands, kissed, or even confessed to someone up until now. Of course, you suddenly getting so close and pecking him with your hands balled up would send his heart into a flurry.

The usually put together Student Council President in front of you let out a strangled noise from the back of his throat, the tips of his ears and face becoming rosier. His throat was closing up, God, why was his throat closing up? Not now, please. He couldn't even remember what he was meant to be saying.

You smiled at him, happy to be rendering him to such a state. It was one of the most impulsive things you've done up to date, but you couldn't find yourself regretting it.

This was what those coming of age dramas on TV were describing—it was the start of one of those cheesy, really bad High School romances. Fervent, mushy, uncertain, but so tender it made your heart ache for hours even after watching.

As you retreated slowly, he caught a glimpse of your bright eyes, downcast lashes, and—holy shit you were so close. He could see the particular way you curled your lips.

He had to hold his breath.

Jungwon watched as your expression morphed into one of slight mischievousness, and an inkling of something softer, before you dashed out the sliding doors—

"Wait!

The sudden motion made him gain his words back, but you were already through the hallways with your hand on your bag.

—leaving him with nothing but the memory and the patter of your footsteps. So fast, so much speed, were you in track? The past few seconds were nothing but a blur of confusion and feelings he didn't want felt.

What just... What just happened?

previous | next - series masterlist

TLDR (but whyy :( pls read it); jungwon goes to do take backsies on his confession, u kiss his cheek, he goes coocoo bananas!!!

TAGLIST; @lumixen @ghjasksdk @atinyyylove @jjikyuu @yjwooon @ncityy04 @tyunni @littlewolfieposts @xoxojayd3n @rosiechaengz @sunshine-skz @youreverydayzebra @hobistigma @plshhhhhhh @lokideadontheinside @alo-ehas @milkycloudtyg @bangtopia

send an ask or dm

i wanted to emphasize how new his feelings for yeri :] if u could guess what this could mean. alsoooo... did u notice how fast this went ? i intended it to be rushed and "in the moment" like it was in the scene hehe

[thefallenbibliophilequote]

Wildest Dreams

Loki x Reader

1989, chapter 9

"He only saw her in his dreams."

Summary: It's hard to find the one, but even if you do find him it's always going to be a daily struggle to make it work. Can you even make it work after he broke your heart? The answer to that is complicated, but it all started when you found each other again in the stark tower- and that's where our story begins.

Word count: 3,695

Warnings: language as always, angst and some tiny fluff (probably not in the way you want), alludes to sex, Odin. one malec reference.

A/N: okay so, this chapter is different since it is mainly introspective about Loki's time in the 6 months he has been back in Asgard- so that's that about the timeline.

A/N2: I really hope you'll like it so let me know by reblogging and commenting! If you want to be on my taglist let me know by sending an ask! Thank you @chrissquares for the dividers! and the amazing @nacho-bucky

No one is allowed to repost my writing or steal or copy my work! Reblog on tumblr is fine.

Series masterlist

Song on Spotify and YouTube

Month one in Asgard.

"Brother I assure you all will be well. I'll make sure she will be safe." Thor had told him that before he left for Midgard.

The gesture was nice but while he did want you to be safe he didn't want to know who you are hanging with.

You'll find a way to move on and so will he. Once this all will be over Loki will finally get some peace and his life will return to normal, nothing lasts forever after all.

Life as a prince was supposedly comfortable, and so a prince's chambers should be as well. But as he was lying on the big soft bed in his large room, he couldn't have felt more alone. The bed was too big, the sheets were too cold, and the surfaces of the room were too empty of life- he could find a million faults to his room if he tried.

Loki didn't stay in his room often then, as a prince he could do whatever he wants and he could go anywhere he wants- well, almost.

Sparring was a great hobby he developed when he was angry, having a chance to politely beat down another person often sounds delightful to him then. It was almost empty now at the sunset but he found an opponent.

He could feel and hear his own heartbeat as he took in a breath and looked into the sunset as the warrior took his stance in front of him.

'The Norse Gods are almost immortal.'

The sentence lingered in your head. Maybe buying this book was a bad idea. At the knock on your door you quickly shut the book and shoved it under the sofa cushion.

A moment later Loki walked in with a batch of freshly picked flowers, they didn't look like they were from around here, you only hoped these flowers can survive on their own so you wouldn't kill them.

"Hello my love, are you ready for our date?" you got up to him with a smile, he put the flowers in a vase that appeared on your table, once he was in your reach you gave him a peck on the lips.

"Yes, let's go!" The relationship was still new but you were happy that you still had that same chemistry that the two of you had before.

That sentence kept your mind busy as you drove out of the city, away from the crowd of people and into a high solitary space.

"I could've just teleported us there my love, you know that right?" he looked at you as you drove, the sun was shining over you and he couldn't look away. The view of you in the sunlight with your best dress and red lips is easily more stunning than anything he had seen in all the realms.

"Yes, but it's more fun this way." You insisted on having some of the dates be normal and human.

"How is driving for such a long time fun?" you saw him shake his head from the corner of your eyes.

"Just relax Loki, I'll put on some great driving songs." He groaned but you only laughed.

It was an hour or so later that you reached your destination- it was an amazing view seeing all the trees and rocks as you finally parked on the dry ground of the mountain hill spot you found for Loki and you.

Loki stepped outside and laid out the picnic you packed up as you looked down on the beautiful horizon as the sun began to set.

Loki came up behind you and curled his hands around your waist.

You could've stayed in that content moment forever. The sentence still lingered in your brain.

"Loki?" you called to him and he only hummed in response, his lips kissing your hair.

"Yes, darling?"

"Say you'll remember me." You asked him in a low voice.

"What?"

"Say you'll remember me, here at this moment, standing in a nice dress and staring at the sunset with you."

"I promise you my dear," he kissed your shoulder and you felt him smiling. "Every time I see you, I'll remember this moment. I'll relish it forever."

•

Month two in Asgard.

It was different, spending the time with her here was nothing like being with you there- but maybe that's a good thing.

He was trying to get used to all the same emotions he felt all those years go. The regret, the knowing that he has to let go completely, the anger and temporary solutions, and then there's the sadness.

It was a familiar process, but having you again just reminded him of everything he lost and how everything has changed after he first let you go.

The first time he let you go, it almost killed him. And now he didn't know how his own mind would work to survive this.

He spent days in meetings and peace negotiating. His father kept him busy whether it was with Iyllir or work, it didn't matter.

She was excited about the wedding- their wedding. He chimed him whenever she asked for his opinion.

"What do you think about the flowers? Besides the ones I already picked of course." The lady smiled at him and waited for his answer. Anything besides your favourite flower would be fine.

The only real thing in this month for him was the work he was doing- negotiating peace was not an easy task. Granted, he could've solved it long ago but where is the fun in that?

"It was a wise choice to listen to my advice. I'm sure your decision to marry soon to be Princess Iyllir will make everyone happy." Odin told Loki as he followed the Allfather into yet another meeting. Entering the room, Loki looked at the blonde who sat next to his seat- he wasn't supposed to be in this meeting.

Taking the seat next to him, Thor smiled at his brother.

"Brother," Loki greeted him and continued to look forward at the table. "Are you not supposed to still be in Midgard?"

"I am, but I returned for a bit," Thor lowered his eyes then. "I heard about the marriage, I'm happy for you."

His pat on the back felt gentler than the usual forceful ones. To Loki it was quite unsettling.

"To be quite honest, I thought you won't do it because-"

"Thank you brother, I look forward to the marriage, it's the right choice."

"Is it?" Thor asked his brother lowly, the meeting was already starting and Loki didn't respond but it was probably best to leave this topic for now. Thor had never seen his brother the way he was when he was with you, it was clear that you mean a lot to him, so it made it that much more worrisome that Loki was going to go through with the arranged marriage. Thor knew Loki would've easily gotten out of it if he wanted to.

•

Present day on Midgard.

"Why are you all staring at me?" Thor stood there with all of his friends from work looking at him silently.

Natasha was the one to break the silence, "Y/N has been kidnapped and we think the Asgardian problem that we have on our hands right now was the cause of it."

"Y/N has been kidnapped?" His brows furrowed and he put his hammer on the table. "When did this happen?"

"Last week, you weren't here."

"I had to attend a ball for my brother and…" he trailed off.

"Right, I'm sure the wedding was lovely." The captain retorted.

"We really don't need to talk about," Wanda started and looked between Pietro and Clint.

"The wedding hasn't occurred yet." Thor settled in a seat right in front of Steve. "Did you manage to find out where she might be?"

"If we did then she would've been home by now."

"No, we've got nothing so far." Nat glared at Steve before she returned to look at Thor.

"Well you could've told me sooner, I'm sure my brother will be able to help."

"What? Are you crazy?" Steve let out a bitter laugh and stood up. One of his hands was a fist on the table and the other was pointing at Thor. "He is not coming anywhere near here."

The dark tone in Steve's voice left no room for arguments. Tony only heard it once before and so he took Steve out of the room before anything could happen.

•

Month three in Asgard.

"I see that you've read the books that I recommended you already." Iyllir sat next to him on the dark blue couch in the large palace library. Gold and blue were all around and the smell of old books filled the air.

"Yes they were very interesting," She put a hand on his arm delicately. "You have incredible taste in books my prince."

He nodded at that and quickly picked up one of the books from the pile that was set aside on the table. The guide to the old weapons of the nine realms- he remembered reading it as a child, he used to sneak into the vaults and look around at all the hidden things he found there that he read about in his books. Whatever he didn't recognize he would pick it up and study it. There may have been a couple of accidents there- but come on, what did you expect?

Now the book let his mind wander to the happenings on earth. He heard Thor talk about how it is going there in hushed whispers, but he never stuck around to actually hear anything in fear it would be about you.

He didn't need to know how you were doing, who you were hanging with or what you were up to.

"Loki?" He got snapped out of his thoughts. He looked back at Iyllir who had an unreadable look on her face, he found it hard to read people when he was so caught up inside his own mind, but her face soon took on a gentle smile. "You drifted off a bit. You're here with me now, there's no need to dwell over anything- so let's leave this book aside, it seems to put you in a bad mood."

Iyllir took the book from his hands and put it behind her. She then linked her hand with his and caressed his arm, her head leaning on his shoulder.

His mind now wandered to her and their wedding that was coming soon. Iyllir did manage to put herself in his mind where you should be, so maybe this was the right call after all.

Loki smiled at her and they continued to engage in conversation.

•

Month four in Asgard.

It was hard to admit that he enjoyed Iyllir's company.

Her lips were soft, and he appreciated the way they made thoughts disappear from his brain.

"Did you really turn into a snake?" Iyllir's laugh joined his as he recalled the memory.

"He was quite shocked, we were eight at the time."

"That was quite clever of you, my prince." She laughed and let her head fall onto his chest as they lay in his bed, covered in green silky sheets.

"Well, I'm always clever."

"Now you're just giving yourself too much credit, you are not always clever." You laughed at him.

He shook his head and turned back to her.

"What do you think about going out of the castle for a bit, go for a couple of days to a small cabin far away from other asgardians just the two of us?"

She nodded enthusiastically and leaned up to a kiss.

•

"This place is beautiful, but I wish we would've brought maids with us- you shouldn't do any of these things, you're a prince. I sent a letter so hopefully the servants will get here soon."

"Oh, I was quite content with using my magic, but how thoughtful of you."

"Now you'll get to spend more time with me." She whispered to him and walked over to him, putting her hands around Loki's neck.

He pulled her closer.

"That is true." He said in between kisses, moving the two of them backwards until Iyllir's knees touched the bed.

"You know, it is not really proper for a man and woman to be in bed together like this before their wedding night." She moaned at the kisses he trailed down her neck.

"When did I ever care about such formalities, my dear?" she let out a breathy laugh as he laid her on the mattress and he hovered above her. "And I know for a fact that you don't either."

Loki was in bed, opening his eyes and seeing the redheaded girl still sleeping next to him, her bare back shone in the sun. They were twisted in bed sheets, and Loki looked back up at the ceiling and tried to go back to sleep, closing his eyes.

"Loki, come cuddle me, I'm cold." Your sleepy voice called out to him.

"Okay, love." He moved himself closer to the body next to him. Opening his eyes for a second, he got snapped back to reality when he realized that you weren't the one in his bed, he was cuddling someone who wasn't you.

He shook his head and tried to fall asleep when Iyllir pressed back against him.

•

Month five in Asgard.

The ballroom was massive and adorned with gold and touches of green. The people there were ecstatic about the upcoming wedding.

The crowded room was full of people drinking mead and eating and dancing. But it all seemed just a bit too much for him.

Never in his wildest dreams did he think this will happen to him that this would be his life. Every girl was here with the most beautiful dresses but all he could remember was you, dancing with him in your best dress, you could easily beat any girl here with that dress and your beauty.

Loki was seated next to the Allfather and Iyllir, watching over the room as more and more new asgardians came to pay their respects and congratulate the happy couple. Thor came up behind them and patted Loki on the back before he took him away to drink.

According to Thor it was a necessity.

After that he had a dance with his soon to be wife, only a few kisses were engaged, Loki didn't like being as affectionate out in the open, in front of so many people.

The dance ended and the mead started to kick in, and if he was honest it was quite amusing to see Thor drunk as he talked, or more so yelled, to his friends.

After the ball he didn't see Thor as much, he must be busy with… whatever that was happening on Midgard. He won't let himself think too much about it, so he kept himself busy with wedding preparations and council meetings.

He spent the month buried in work during the day, and clearing his head during the night.

•

Present day in Midgard.

"Tony, I already told you that her powers don't have any energy trackers that we can build on."

"Bruce, we already scoured hydra bases. We found no information about her." Tony looked at the screen in front of him before pushing it aside, startling Bruce. "Sorry."

The doors to the lab opened and they turned to see Thor coming in with a short smile.

"Have you got any news about Lady Y/N?" he looked around the room anxiously, his next words would certainly get a reaction from the two scientists. "Do you need my brother's help?"

"Thor, I don't think that's a good idea." Tony exchanged a look with Bruce and he rubbed his eyes. "But no, we still don't know where she is."

"Why refuse his help?" Thor's voice grew louder. He then looked at the door when it opened for Steve and Wanda.

"We already told you Thor, we don't want his help." Steve chuckled darkly, so Wanda put her hand on the captain's shoulder then, trying to ease the tension.

"Thor, this isn't something Loki can help with, this is hydra."

"He will still do whatever he can, he still cares for her-"

"Besides, he is probably busy preparing for his wedding, isn't that right?"

"You are being judgmental Steve," Thor came towards Steve. "You're not thinking rationally."

"Oh I am judging him just right. If you're only here to try and vouch for your brother than you may as well go."

"Steve!" Wanda called him but he didn't budge his stare from the Asgardian prince.

Thor left shortly after.

Steve ignored the stares.

•

"Father, the elves are calming down, if we send some aid we could make sure peace is settled." Loki talked to his father in the throne room.

"If we send aid, they could use it against us. They could just be faking submission." Loki held back a laugh.

"I'm not the god of lies for nothing father, I'd be able to tell if they were faking it. Trust me about this." The doors opened with a bang, shutting behind the blonde prince as he strode towards Loki.

"My son, what are you doing here?"

"Loki," Thor ignored his father and Loki got up and looked at Thor at the strange occurrence. "Y/N has been kidnapped, you need to come back."

"She what?" His heartbeat sped up and he could feel the warm sensation of anger rise in him from the fear.

"Who is this girl?" Odin looked between his two sons when none answered. "Thor?"

"A girl from Midgard, she's an Avenger." He looked over Loki and nodded his head, he needed to be the one to talk.

"She's just a girl that I knew from Midgard." He said to his father with his jaw clenched, then he turned to Thor. "Thor, what happened?"

"They think she's got taken because of her powers, or because of the Asgardian technology that was stolen."

"My sons, you will answer to the questions I pose. Now tell me, what powers does she posses? If she has a part in the problem we have on Midgard then I deserve to know that."

Thor nodded, encouraging Loki to speak up.

"She has the power to insert herself into people's minds and control what they see and feel." He shook his head at his father. "She has no role in this father, she should not be mixed with Asgardian business."

The Allfather was quiet then before he shifted in his throne.

"Son, you know her for quite some time isn't that right?" Loki nodded and looked down.

"And you seem to care for her, too." He was no longer asking but Loki found himself nodding anyway. "Did she know about you being an Asgardian?"

"Yes, she knew who I was."

"So have you ever used your magic on her?" Loki was halfway into shaking his head before he stopped and remembered that night he spent comforting you, sitting on the tile of your bathroom.

"Only once," he thought back at the ancient spell.

"Tell me now my son, has it ever crossed your mind that such powerful magic as the one you have will affect a mortal immensely?"

"What are you saying father?" Thor looked up at Odin.

"It was a powerful spell…" Loki was still in thought about his actions that night, he must have been emotional.

"Her powers can be of Asgardian source, the mortal's powers sound like old Asgardian magic- the reality stone that was stored here long ago. The spell must have been from those ancient time, and so it stored immense powers- the kind that a mortal could not bear."

"So is that why they took her? Because of my magic, they took her because of me." Loki mumbled to himself.

"Loki, no don't say that-"

"It's true Thor! I'm going to get her back." Loki didn't wait for Odin to object before he all but ran out of the door. Odin didn't object.

"Thor, go after him. If he finds her, he will find the rest of the stolen weapons." Thor nodded to his father before following his brother.

•

Steve looked at the papers scattered on the lab.

"This is a nightmare."

"I've had better nightmares." Natasha spoke from next to him. "You should go rest a bit, you look like hell."

He smiled at her but it barely reached his eyes. You were a part of his family, losing you is not an option. He didn't know where you were and he didn't want to think about what you may be going through.

He wasn't the only one who cared about you, he knew that, but it still felt like they don't understand.

He turned around to go get water, when he almost ran into someone.

Looking up he saw the blue eyes of the raven haired prince. His tiredness suddenly disappeared when he took in the cold demeanor and rage filled eyed.

"I've been away for six long months and meanwhile you let her get kidnapped just like that?" Loki's voice was low and Steve didn't notice Thor walk in right after Loki, he didn't hear Bucky calling him.

"You are not welcome here Loki, and don't talk about it as if it isn't your entire fault."

The answer he got was in a dark laugh.

"Oh captain, I'm afraid I'm way past asking permission." Loki moved past him. "How long was she gone?"

"Almost a month," Bucky replied, looking between Steve's clenched posture and the same one that Loki held. "Can you find her?"

"I'll do whatever it takes." He nodded to the soldier and Bucky recognized the vulnerability in his eyes.

"Her powers are Asgardian, they came from me." Loki looked at the different screens, the room was quiet. "Doctor Banner, do you think you could track my energy signature? She should have some part of it inside her."

Loki looked back at the doctor, awaiting a response.

"Yes, I will just need to take some of your-"

"Take what you need."

•

Tags: @ayybtch @buckys-other-punk @chaoticpete @madcrazy50 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @the-departed-potato @rogerrhqpsody @onceupona-happilyeverafter-love @percabethismyotp14

[kyejuns]

love is a bad word

✎ᝰ┆chan × reader

✎ᝰ┆playboy!au, fluff ; warnings : none

sigh was originally going to just write for epex but to1 came knocking 😨 this ain't my proudest work tbh i had a lot of mental blocks while writing but i hope you enjoy it still! <3 ANYWAYS im not sure if ill write for to1 definitely but for now just enjoy this chanhyuk one! <3 dedicated to my bestie @mintfilms bc i miss her :(

day 1

"gosh, it's brutal out here." you say as chewed on the gum minsu gave you. you gave the couple that was making out a disgusted glance and twirled your hair in between your fingers.

"that's cho chanhyuk, he's a year older and also the notorious playboy of our school." minsu explained as he stood behind you. "i would recommend you staying away from him in case he breaks your heart."

"break my heart? what if i break his first. looks like you don't know me that as well as you claim kim minsu." you smirked, walking away as the bell rings.

"you're a girl after all, chan isn't as easy as you think. he isn't like sungmin." he said and you nodded mindlessly.

"we can test it out, can't we?" you grinned, turning back and making eye contact with him. "he looks... easy."

day 7

"new girl!" someone shouted after you as you climbed the stairs.

you turned around looking at him and narrowed your eyes. you remembered him vividly, of course, how could you forget? you raised a brow at him, urging him to continue as he seemed like he had something to say.

"have lunch with me?" he asked and you grimaced.

"and here i am, thinking you'd be better at asking a girl out." you scoffed, shaking your head and continued walking upstairs.

chan didn't seem to be easily defeated by your snarky comment though, instead, he seemed to be even more interested in you, following you up to the rooftop.

you decided not to question him, enjoying the silence and peace without your chatterbox cousin minsu. you leaned forward, taking in the busy streets of seoul quietly.

"why'd you transfer?" chan muttered, breaking the silence as he stood beside you, looking down at the busy streets too.

"no reason, just hated my previous school." you lied, shrugging. "and you, why are you constantly toying around girls' feelings?" you looked at him and he shrugged.

"no reason, just felt like it." he snickered and you nodded, looking away.

"you dated so many girls and yet never fell in love. kinda impressive." you replied sarcastically.

"love is a bad word. it isn't real." chan sighed and you frowned.

"who says? love exists. my aunt and uncle, they love each other dearly." you glared at him.

"you act like you don't toy around with boys." he retorted, glaring right back at you.

you took in a deep breath, suppressing your anger and faked a smile at him.

"love exists but i'm one of the few who doesn't deserve it." you swallowed down the lump in your throat and walked away.

chan stood rooted to the ground, staring at your shadows that was getting smaller and smaller as you got further and further away.

you situated yourself under a tree and looked up into the sky, repeating to yourself under your breath, "love does exist."

day 24

you took your seat in the library, opening up your laptop as you prepared to work on an overdue assignment. plugging in your earphones, you played your favourite playlist and sighed, looking through the articles.

chan spotted you from a far and grinned, silently creeping behind you and took the seat beside you. you looked over at him, sulking at his appearance.

"cho chanhyuk, there's so many empty seats, why sit beside me?" you rolled your eyes and turned back your attention to the screen in front of you.

"whatever, i just missed you." chan pouted, taking one side of your earpiece. "what are you working on?"

"go away chanhyuk, not now." you huffed, irritated at his presence.

chan seemed to get the cue immediately and remained quiet for the rest of the time he was with you.

after a while, you got weirdly uneasy at the silence with him and sneakily stole a glance of him. a small smile made it's way onto your lips as you saw him sleeping soundly beside you. you quietly took out the earbud that was resting in his ear and plugged it back into your own ear.

you frowned, noticing the sun was shining right into his eyes. heaving a sigh, you lifted your hand and hovered it over his eyes as an attempt to block the sunlight from him and continued to study the articles.

unbeknown to you, chan was awake. he opened his eyes after realizing the bright light that was shining into his eyes was gone. he struggled to keep a straight face as he noticed the hand that was hovering over his eyes protecting him from the sunlight.

love was starting to reintroduce itself to the two of them.

day 67

"haven't you noticed? chan hasn't been dating or messing around with anyone for the past month..." minsu frowned in confusion as the both of you walked past chan's group of friends.

"really? maybe he decided that the playboy lifestyle isn't the way." you replied, uninterested as you looked at your nails. "don't you think this-"

"you haven't been messing around with anyone either. have you not noticed?" he said frustratedly and narrowed his eyes at you.

"as i was saying, don't you think this colour matches me well? it isn't as ugly as i thought." you ignored him and continued looking at your nails.

"of course it does." you heard the same annoying voice say as he wrapped his arms around your shoulder.

you looked up at him and gave him a look, "yeah okay, getting these removed."

chan snickered and he hugged you tighter, unknowingly you lean into his hold. minsu gave the both of you a look and shook his head in disappointment before trudging away.

"okay but, purple suits you well, you should keep it." chan complimented, tucking a hair strand behind your ear.

"is that so?"

day 94

your collection of purple has started to grow larger and larger. even your liking towards the colour grew. everyone but you and chan noticed of course.

the two players turned out to be the ones most oblivious to these scenarios.

"cho chanhyuk!" you called after him, running up to him.

"what's up?" he grinned, patting your head gently.

"nothing." you looked away, eyes wandering as an unfamiliar feeling succumbs you.

an unusual swarm of butterflies flew in your stomach, it was as if spring had sprung in you. you turned to look at chan, only to see him staring right down at you.

"i wanna be with you, always. i think i'm in love with you." chan confessed and you grinned.

"i told you love existed."

"and you deserve it."

[chicoriii]

Season 4, Episode 4 - Mr Pigeon 72

I have no idea where to start. This episode has some good things and some extremely stupid.

Marinette isn't still completely fine, but I prefer when she deals with it through being hyperactive than being a whining crybaby.

I know people don't agree with me, but personally I don't buy the whole revealing identity to Alya. It's not a problem with Alya herself, I would say the same about every single character who is not named Alix Kubdel at this point of the story. I haven't written anything in my post about Gang of Secrets, because I thought it would be undone in some way at the start of the next episode. The creators did nothing to explain why revealing identity of Ladybug to anyone was super dangerous and would result in a catastrophe in seasons 1-3 and the first two episodes of S4, but it's magically fine in episode 3. Only Alix made sense to me, as she will be the rabbit Miraculous holder, so she is destined to discover identities of everyone sooner or later and Marinette is aware of that. While it's not necessary to learn identity of anyone to other temporary Miraculous wielders, including Alya. Also that reveal hasn't been foreshadowed in season 3, while the show usually does it, especially if it's about something as important as that! More, in late S3, it's been shown that Alya still can't resist to not talking about Marinette's love life with Nino, despite she asked her to not do it. Now the girl, who is overly excited about superhero stuff, has no problems with even accidental revealing anything to Nino or someone else. She's even "stealing" Bunnix line that she's great at keeping secrets (sorry but you, the creators, haven't shown us that she's indeed is before!). This is why I think that reveal hasn't been planned before they started writing season 4.

But okay, I can deal with it, even if I don't buy it, but things these happened in Mr. Pigeon 72 are even more inconsistent with previous seasons. I have been worried about it, so it doesn't surprised me. For some reason Guardian related-things that have been kept in a secret before from everyone minus current Guardian and the future Guardian, are now fine being done in front of Kwamis (remember, they haven't been allowed to learn about making potions before!) and a civilian who is just a temporal Miraculous holder, not someone who is supposed to be trained to be a new Guardian. You can say - new Guardian, new rules, but why? Marinette has been portrayed as someone who respect authorities, she has never questioned any Fu's rules. It wasn't even said in the episode that she's going to change the rules. I hate that the writers don't even bother to explain us what's going on. Probably they don't bother about consistency, they think the audience is going to be too excited about Alya knowing Ladybug's identity and helping Marinette to question anything about it? How Alya could be allowed to learn the Guardian secrets? She is just best friend of the protagonist, she is not one of the main characters to get that special treatment. I makes zero sense to me. Especially since Su-Han will be introduced in episode 6 and he should help Marinette with understanding the Grimoire, Alya isn't necessary here for any other reason than fanservice.

In my opinion the way how they discovering how to make charms that protects from akumasitation was the most stupid thing that happened this season and one of the most in the whole show. Marinette who is the new Guardiand and portrayed as someone extreme intelligent and creative couldn't find the solution for days, but Alya with zero training magically discovered it in a few hours at worst. And when she told her the solution in not even very clear way, Ladybug did it immediately with no effort. That was so anticlimactic. At least the animation was fine, but other aspects of it was just a big disappointment, and I was looking forward for it. Thank goodness it's just the beginning of the season, I hope later important events of the season will be better written and portrayed.

Also I find it absurd that Rena Rough is walking with a page from the Grimoire like it's just an ordinary book and she's talking about it in front of a random civilian, like things that are written there are nothing special. She or Ladybug are not careful about Miraculous lore anymore. Not to mention that they are giving hints that Rena is very close to Ladybug in public, suspiciously close. And now with them being too careless, that's not hard to suspect that Rena Rouge is someone very close to Ladybug, maybe even as a civilian. Shadow Moth knows Rena Rouge's identity, and it's easy to him to learn who is Alya Cesaire's best friend if he doesn't know it yet, after all his son is in the class with her. Marinette has always been super careful and serious about her duties before, why that sudden change with zero explanation? It's just very out of character to her in my opinion.

I didn't like the akuma battle either, it's now the worst fight of the season in my opinion. It was so short and felt very lazy. I only liked that Plagg got some action and interaction with Ladybug (though it should be suspicious for her that he managed to reach to her that fast). He should be aware now that Alya knows Ladybug's identity but he acts like nothing happened. Not a word about it being unfair towards his kid or something, weird.

Thankfully the rest of the episode is generally more or less fun to me. It was nice to see Marinette and Kagami interacting again. I loved Kagami in the episode, although it was a bit weird to me that she isn't seemed to be affected by her breaking up with Adrien. Like her crush was very shallow, so she managed to recover herself from it very quickly. While it's been shown that Luka is hurt, despite Lukanette always seemed to be much more shallow than Adrigami in my opinion. But maybe it's because she's so down to earth, so being less emotional makes sense for her character. I liked how her attitude was opposite to Marinette's hyperactive: "No, I don't want to be in a relationship with Adrien again, he disappointed me, just let me live!!!". And she's another character who said that Marinette and Adrien are made for each other. I'm not surprised that Kagami sees it now when she tried to be with him and that didn't work. She's observant, sees more than many other characters. It seems she's an Adrienette shipper now. It's also good that her issue with Adrien wasn't resolved that easily and too fast. They need more time, but I'm sure they will be friends again.

So, we've gotten shirtless Adrien. I remember seeing a tweet of Thomas in which he answered to a question if there will be a beach episode and he said we will get something similar. I wonder if he meant this episode. Oh, they just remembered that Adrien is supposed to be allergic to feathers. It seems Adrien has allergic reactions only when it's somewhat related to the plot. When it's not, he's completely fine.

The reference to the famous Umbrella Scene™ out of nowhere in a random episode? It probably means something. I can see "reverse crush" supporters interpreting it as a proof to their theory, especially since this time Adrien did something clumsy and Marinette is laughing because of it (actually both of them). Or maybe because it's the first episode of season 4 with Marinette and Adrien interactions, they decided to be that much gracious for Adrienette fans, to compensate lack of it in the first three episodes. Oh wow, Marinette managed to propose spending more time together to Adrien without stuttering. Probably because she has done it spontaneously. Marinette is the most nervous when she's planning and thinking what could go wrong too much. This time she had no time to it, so it went more smoothly. It's like they building development of their relationship, but it didn't seem in Guiltrip (that's episode 11 chronologically) that something changed.

Seeing screenshot above, you can easily imagine how great friends they could be, being very comfortable around each other and laughing together, if not Marinette's anxiety. We need Adrienette development so much to get more moments like this.

Oh and I just realized that it's also one of the veeeeery few episodes with no real Ladynoir at all (the only other one I remember is Style Queen). So if there was no Adrienette it would be an episode without interactions of two main characters at all (although we almost got Ladrien). It could be another reason why this episode is that nice for Adrien and Marinette ship.

After seeing overly excited Marinette dancing in the rain, I can't believe she can manage completely give up on Adrien. It doesn't look like this at all.

Also we've seen three photos of Adrien wearing THAT scarf. It could not mean nothing different that foreshadowing that he's going to discover the truth about it somewhere this season. But I have no idea what Ladybug's mask with shining eyes could mean.

I don't know what to think about the episode. Despite absurd Guardian-related things, I still liked it much more than Gang of Secrets, but I have no idea if I generally enjoyed it more than other episodes of this season or not. At least it's an episode without stupid drama, which is amazing.

---------

I'm currently less active on social media, because my internet connection is very unstable, it often works very slowly to the point I'm not patient enough to visit Tumblr. Also I block spoiler tags again, because I don't want to see spoilers from the episodes those are going to be released very soon, as I feel that they reveal too much to me once more. We're currently in a marathon of the new episodes and since watching them is the more more enjoyable, the less I know about them, I decided to try avoid spoilers as much as I can. The only bad thing is that I can't be read discussions about the new episodes, reblog them and adding something from me until Optigami will be aired.

[arvinsescape]

Big family vaca with readers family like uncles aunts, cousins, nephews, nieces, and like whole big family, and then Tom coming along. The family vaca is like a yearly thing in her family, but it's Tom's xirst time coming, since he couldn't come the year before do to shooting. And he hasn't met the outer part of her family, only her parents, so he is very nervous. They know he is Tom Holland, but the small kids don't, and when they see him they all believe he is the real Spider-Man and Peter Parker, and the kids just wanna hang out with him, and they call him Peter.

A/N: Thank you for sending this in! I LOVED writing this and i hope you enjoy!!

“Why are you so nervous?” You laughed as you waited for the transport to arrive. You were going on your annual family holiday, you were going to be stopping in two villas next to each other. It was a yearly tradition to make sure everyone saw each other and Tom hadn’t been on one yet, last year he was busy shooting so this was his first time.

“I haven’t met some of your family that are going. In fact i think i've only met your parents.” He mumbled and you kissed his cheek.

“They’re awesome I promise! My cousin is fun, you’ll get on really well, she’s got two kids though and they can be quite inquisitive so I apologise in advance for that.” You laughed and he joined.

“What if they think I’m a stuck up actor?” He worried and you smiled softly at him.

“They won’t Tom because you’re not. They don’t judge you know, they’re just like my mum and dad.” You calmed his nerves as the transport arrived. You would be sharing with your cousin, her husband and her two kids because you lived the closest. As soon as you got into the van the kids almost screamed.

“It’s Spiderman!” James screamed as he pointed at Tom and you burst out laughing.

“James! It’s rude to point. I’m so sorry Tom. I’m Kerry it’s so nice to meet you.” Your cousin said and James’ sister, Amelia looked awestruck.

“Who’s Tom? That’s Peter Parker.” James said in confusion and Kerry rolled her eyes.

“No that’s-“

“Peter Parker, nice to meet you.” Tom spoke in his Spiderman voice and Kerry looked so impressed that he was happy to appease the kids and you smiled as the kids almost jumped out of their seats.

You took your seats as James and Amelia sat behind you, Tom was in in for an entertaining ride to the airport.

“So Spiderman.” James started. “Who is fighting crime when you’re on holiday?” You, Kerry and her husband, Nick found that hilarious.

“Well Mr Stark covers for me so I can have a holiday.” Tom answered without breaking character and you swear you fell more in love with him.

“You know Ironman?” Amelia asked, she was a couple of years younger than James, she was four so her memory of the films was quite limited.

“Of course he knows Ironman, he’s an avenger.” James spoke confidently as he crossed his little arms over his chest and you stifled a laugh.

“But Peter aren’t you going out with MJ? Why are you here with Y/N?” James asked and Kerry shook her head.

“Okay James that’s a little rude, we don’t ask questions like that.” Kerry spoke and James huffed.

“Well actually Y/N is my real life girlfriend and MJ is my pretend girlfriend.” Tom or ‘Peter’ spoke again and James seemed somewhat happy with the answer, at six he was still too young to understand how it worked.

“Okay kids that’s enough, Tom’s on holiday so let him chill out yeah.” Nick spoke and Amelia nodded quietly, she was a lovely kid, really sweet and quiet. Almost the opposite of James who was quite mischievous and outspoken. James huffed as he sat back in his seat and pulled out his switch.

Amelia leant forward and quietly spoke to Tom. “I’m sorry spiderman.” She said with a small smile and your heart soared, she was adorable.

“That’s okay.” Tom gave her a reassuring smile and she grinned.

“Sorry, I forgot to mention that the kids are obsessed with spiderman. You can correct them if you want.” You said quietly and he chuckled.

“It’s fine really, I don’t mind. It’s nice to know you can make people happy you know. Plus I bet they ask me more interesting questions than some of those interviewers do.” He laughed.

“Just wait until you meet the other two.” You smirked. The journey to the airport was quite quiet, Tom was chatting away to Nick and Kerry and the kids kept looking at him confused when he spoke in his normal accent, it was quite amusing.

You got a text from your aunt to say where they all were and you made your way towards them, as soon as James caught sight of your Aunty Leanne he grabbed Tom’s hand and practically pulled him towards her.

“Aunty Leanne look! Spiderman is here.” He said excitedly as your boyfriend laughed. Leanne looked confused for a second before it clicked that they really did think Peter Parker had come on holiday with them.

“Well that’s fantastic, we won’t have to worry about any bad guys will we.” She said as she hugged James. Amelia had taken your hand as she fell into a walk beside you.

“Y/N? Do you think spiderman will mind if I ask him a few questions?” She asked quietly and you smiled as you bent down to pick her up.

“No, I’m sure he’d love to answer your questions.” You smiled as she kissed your cheek. Amelia was just like you as a kid, she was very wary of talking to new people and it took her a little while to get comfortable, again completely the opposite of her brother.

“Really?” Her eyes lit up and you kissed her nose.

“Really. You can sit with us on the plane if you want?” You smiled. You knew that if Amelia was gonna get a word in edgeways you were gonna have to separate her from the boys, they were all good kids, truly but they were far louder and more outspoken than her.

As if on queue two boys came barrelling towards James as they tackled him to the floor. Your other cousin trying to stop them. You laughed at the scene as you watched the boys have their yearly tussle on the ground.

“Look Luke, Jake. It’s spiderman.” James said as he pointed to Tom and they both whipped around to look at him.

“No way! It’s Peter Parker.” Luke said. He was twins with Jake and the same age as James.

“Can you shoot a web over there please?” Jake said and they all looked at him expectantly.

“I left my web shooters at home boys I’m so sorry.” Tom said, he was good at keeping character in front of your whole family.

“He’s in for a fun holiday.” Your mum said as she found you.

“He certainly is.” You laughed.

The plane ride was relatively chill, the boys had argued at first over who got to sit next to Tom and huffed when you told them you’d already said Amelia could. Amelia was coming out of her shell on the plane as she spoke to Tom more and Tom found her as adorable as you did. She was asking him questions that he was happily answering as you turned around awkwardly to speak to Kerry and Nick.

The holiday was amazing, Tom had nothing to worry about he got along with your family so well and the kids loved him. You’d tried to explain to them that Tom was Tom but they weren’t having it. “No Y/N, that is peter, you don’t know what you’re talking about.” They insisted on playing with him all the time.

He became somewhat of a baby sitter but he didn’t mind, everyone found it endearing. Amelia came out of her shell completely by day two and was playing along, although you think she found the place of favourite in Tom’s heart although he wouldn’t admit it. They had him doing flips and all sorts throughout the holiday, you felt sorry for him at times but he looked like he was having a crazy amount of fun.

“He’s really good with kids you know.” Kerry had said.

“Yeah, he is.” You smiled as you watched them all play in the pool with Tom and their respective dads.

“I really like him, i think he’s good for you.” She said and you smiled.

“Yeah, i think he is too. I really love him you know.” You said.

“I know and I know he loves you. He might be a very good actor but you can’t fake that look of love.” She said and you both laughed as you watched James throw a ball that almost hit Amelia in the face until Tom caught it easily.

“Spiderman saved me.” Amelia screamed as she hugged Tom and he smiled.

[sapphire374]

Soy Sol: Chapter 2 (Gossip that Spreads like Wildfire)

Wattpad Link

Ch. 1, / Ch. 3 / Ch.4 / Ch.5 / Ch.6 / Ch.7 / Ch.8 / Ch.9 / Ch.10 / Ch.11 / Ch.12 / Ch.13 / Ch.14 / Ch.15 / Ch.16 / Ch.17

Luna is stunned by what she's just witnessed. She'd never expect Matteo to be cozying up so close with a random girl, especially after everything they've been through together. Luna started having doubts and her fears just came rushing over her like a waterfall. She couldn't believe that he would do this, all because she was late

When Matteo sees that it was Luna who opened the door, he immediately got up ignoring Viviana, as if she wasn't there. "Luna, I've been looking everywhere for you. You promised you would be here for my last show and you know how important this is for me. Why were you late.... again? You even promised to watch the entire show this time." Luna just stood there, staring at Matteo. Her rambunctious thoughts were clouding her judgement. She doesn't want to think about it, yet she already is. What if Matteo is cheating on her?

Matteo's face quickly changed when he saw a depressed look on her very pale face. "Que to pasa mi amor? What's the matter my love?" Matteo asks Luna in a very worried tone. Luna shakes her head from a terrified trance. "No nothing, I just came to tell you how proud I am. The arena seemed packed with loads of people. Umm yeah and I also wanted to apologize for being late. Too late it seems." Luna tries to not think about what she noticed yet the random girl staying in the room isn't making Luna feel any better. "I'm sorry who are you?" Luna questions the girl sitting on the couch who seems to not feel bad for listening on their conversation.

"I'm Viviana Marcel. Some people like to call me a very famous actress and rising singer; but if I'm being modest, I've only been in like fifteen movies," Viviana brags to Luna, showing off. "Really. Well sorry I had to ask is just I've never seen you on TV or in anything," Luna says sincerely which brings an enraged frown onto Viviana's face. "Oh, would you look at the time, it's getting late. I don't want to arrive home late since I have a very important meeting at Laix tomorrow. You know the place where famous people work together. I wouldn't be surprised if you didn't know it since you're not, well a celebrity. Ciao Matteo, I'll talk to you later." Viviana leaves after giving a wink to Matteo.

Luna's depressed look still stays plastered on her face. That girl almost reminds her of a celebrity version of Daniela, and after everything was finally going great for her and Matteo. "Luna, your smile has disappeared all of a sudden and hasn't come back. Please tell me what's wrong. I'm always here for you," Matteo states to Luna, expressing his concern. Luna almost stutters when she says, "Matteo why is Viviana here? What were you doing with her?" Matteo instantly takes a sigh of relief because he originally thought something unpleasant happened to her. "Oh, Luna you don't have to worry about her. She's just a friend I met through Rafeal. It's okay." "Matteo what would've happened if I didn't arrive at that moment," Luna asks anxiously holding on to every word she said. Matteo hesitantly replies, "Nothing. Nothing at all."

. . . . . . . .

Next Morning

Simón and Ámbar's House

Simón wakes up in his Buenos Aires home at eight o'clock in the morning. He's surprised to notice Ámbar is not there beside him. He pulls the sheets to their new bed and marches to the kitchen. Ámbar is sitting in the dining table doing some paperwork while drinking a café con leche. This brings a large smile on his face seeing how hard of a worker his soon to be wife is. "Buenos días mi amor. Good morning my love," Simón declares to Ámbar which also brings a warm smile on her face. "So, how's the paperwork going?" Simón asks Ámbar. "Honestly, it's not looking too good. I don't know if we'll be able to keep the Jam and Roller for so long especially since Vidia is considering on selling it to this company who wants to remodel it as a club and bar. They're the ones with the highest bid and if nobody comes soon to place a higher offer... we may lost it," Ámbar reluctantly replies to Simón.

"I can't believe this. First the separation of the Roller Band, then the separation of the Roller team, and now this. The worst part is how can we even tell Luna about this? How can we tell the rest about this," Simon complains while he and Ámbar give each other worried glances. "I don't know how we should tell her but one thing I know for sure is that we need to tell her soon cause what if she finds out and thinks we were lying to her this whole time. The one thing I've learned from my previous mistakes is that lying does no good and the truth always ends up revealing itself... but we'll think about that later. Right now, let's eat some breakfast cause I have a meeting to get to. Whatever happens, we need to find a backup plan to work somewhere else while I study to become a lawyer."

As Ámbar gets up from her chair, she turns the TV on. The news channel announces, "This just in! Viviana has been spotted AGAIN being very close to Matteo Balsano, the infamous 'Quiero Verte Sonreir' artist, yesterday night at his last concert for his Alla Voy Tour. Could this mean that Matteo has a new girlfriend and broke up with Luna Valente!" Ámbar and Simón both turn their heads and look at each other, shocked by what they just saw on the news. "I can't believe it! I wonder what Luna must be thinking watching this. It's just that this doesn't even make sense. Matteo would never do such a thing to Luna and even so she would have told me by now," Simón states confusingly. Simón and Ámbar are both confused and concerned about what they have just witnessed.

. . . . . . . .

Nina's Apartment

Nina accidentally spills her coffee after hearing what she just saw on the news. Gastón hears the loud noises in the living room, so he runs quickly to Nina from the kitchen to help her. "Que paso, what happened? Are you okay Nina," Gaston asks while helping her clean the mess she made. Gastón arrived last night from his job being an engineer. The company he works at has multiple branches, so he tends to travel all around the globe to set up meetings and build all sorts of new gadgets. Nina had also arrived from Oxford after finishing the semester early. She only has one year left to graduate and can't wait to travel with Gastón as a professional writer.

"Did you hear what was on the news? Apparently, Matteo has been spotted multiple times with this girl named Viviana. News outlets think that he broke up with Luna and replaced her with Viviana. I just couldn't believe it. I was so shocked I accidentally tipped over my coffee. Sorry for the mess," Nina states to Gastón. "No pasa nada. It's okay, the stain easily comes off but going back to what happened with Matteo... is this true, en serio," Gastón wonders, hoping Nina would say a 'no, just kidding' but sadly that was not the case. "Well we don't know if he did break up with Luna but the pictures that they showed of him with Viviana look very real and very close." "Esto no puede ser. This can't be true. I'm going to call Matteo right away. We have to get to the bottom of this," Gastón vividly expresses his disbelief right before turning his head and seeing the TV screen, in which he noticed the girl that's with Matteo. He doesn't for sure know who she is, but that girl appears very familiar to him. Then, Gastón remembered who she is and quickly runs to go call Matteo. After Nina puts her mug inside the sink, she rushes to go call Luna as well.

*BTW: Thank you guys for the support you've been giving Soy Sol in the last chapter. I really do appreciate it and hope you guys like the rest :D *

[emily-strange]

Sparks Fly

Thank you to everyone still with me after the last chapter - I know not a lot hasn't happened yet but we’re getting going! As always thank you to @billybutchersbabe​ 😘 such a giant help!!!

Hope you all enjoy. Feedback is more than welcome x

Chapter 4

Pairing: Billy Butcher x OFC

Warnings: Swearing - lots of it.

…………………………………………………..

Waking up was hard.

Emmy thinks Butcher might have slipped something into her beer, seems like something he’d do to get answers. Then again, she’s always been a bit of a lightweight when it comes to drinking.

After she had a breakfast bar thrown at her and Hughie arrived with a clean hoodie, Emmy was properly introduced and ushered into the car. Butcher couldn’t contain his snarl at seeing Emmy take off his shirt and replace it with the younger man’s clothes.

MM silently notices how extra shitty he is in the car.

If only he knew it was because the two youngsters were discussing Hughie’s ‘Billy Joel’ t-shirt and bonding in the backseat.

Now Emmy’s wandering around the Believe Expo trying her best to appear like she belongs. Butcher hasn’t really filled her in on the plan, she’s just meant to walk around and see if anything seems weird. She knows the task has been given so it’ll keep her out of trouble, without actually having to tell her anything about the boys. So far, she’s seen a lot of things here that in her opinion, are pretty fucked.

She doesn’t move too far from them, always keeping someone in sight. At the moment the three of them are obviously discussing what they need from Hughie as he’s looking pretty appalled…

Emmy can’t believe she’s actually out of her dingy little town. Not free of it, but out. If you’d asked her 4 days ago where she’d be, she’d say still in the same dingy basement shining up some stolen AK-50’s as always. But instead she’s walking in the sunshine, dodging and weaving through the crowds of young people basking in their joint love of supes and God.

“She’s awesome isn’t she!” comes a voice from next to her, making her jump. A young guy in his 20s is standing way too close to Emmy with a large grin on his face. She then realises that she’s been staring at the singer on stage who’s just uncased her large, angel like wings for the crowd.

“Oh, um, yeah. She’s amazing.” Emmy lies. She looks round the guy and can just about see MM uncomfortably shifting from one foot to the other as Butcher has an intense looking conversation with a stall vendor.

“Is this your first time?” the guy asks, moving back into her line of sight. Emmy uncrosses her arms and softens the scowl on her face.

“How can you tell?” She says, laughing uncomfortably. If the guy notices, he doesn’t make it obvious. He seems sweet enough, Emmy thinks. Light blonde hair and a nice smile, full of perfect teeth. The epitome of squeaky clean.

He laughs, “You just look a little lost. I’m Pete.”

Pete extends his hand to Emmy who shakes it lightly, “Emmy.”

For a few seconds they stand together as the singer starts up again. Emmy internally groans. She’s never been one for religion. She tries to sway with the music, doing her best to blend in.

“What brings you here then Emmy?” Pete says, breaking the mindless chatter in her head.

“Oooh, you know...” Emmy stutters. She sees a poster of Homelander across from her and goes with it, “..The Seven. Homelander…I just, was hoping to catch a glimpse of him. He’s my favourite. As well as Ezekiel of course. He’s…great.” Emmy reals off the names she actually knows, hoping it’ll convince Pete she’s ‘one of them’. It seems to have worked.

“Yesss! Amazing!” Pete shouts, jumping for a high-five. One Emmy gives reluctantly, “You knoow I’m being baptised by Homelander in like, 20 minutes. Wanna come with and see if you can sneak a peak?”

“Ooh um really…baptised? That’s sweet but,” Emmy looks around again for the boys but now can’t see any of them. Pete uses her hesitation and distraction to gently take both of her shoulders, turning her to him. His forehead is creased into a frown.

“Please know I’m saying this as your friend.” He begins and Emmy couldn’t be any more confused, “I think you’re lost. I could see it in your eyes from miles away…please, let me take you to Ezekiel. Me and him, we’re close. I mean, you never know right? Maybe they’ll have a free space.” Pete smiles widely at Emmy and she finds herself tongue tied. She still can’t see anyone she actually knows and Butcher did tell her to snoop around…

“Um, yeah, okay…” She says giving a tight-lipped smile. Pete’s ecstatic. Beyond ecstatic. Suddenly she’s being pulled along towards the tents with absolutely no idea what to do or who she’s about to meet.

………………………………………………….

Once they reach the VIP tent, Emmy is relieved to see people checking for lanyards and tickets. She has neither so it won’t be hard to slip away. However, Pete seems to have been selling himself short, everyone seems to know him. Not just Ezekiel.

“Hi Pete, you here to see Ezekiel?” a pretty young woman asks.

“Yeah for the baptism” he beams, “I was hoping my friend here could just slip in with me? I think it’d do her some good to meet him.” Pete pleads.

Emmy jumps in, hoping to nip this in the bud asap, “Oh but it’s no problem if not. I’m happy to go back. I mean, I haven’t paid…not really fair is it!”

She laughs, hoping she doesn’t seem as awkward as she feels in this moment. Everyone is just so cheery. Makes her feel a little bit sick.

“You know what, I don’t see why not. I mean it isn’t packed in there. You’ll have to leave before the baptism but we have about 10 minutes till then.” The woman says and Emmy tries to make her smile as genuine as possible. Although she can’t shake the feeling that she’s being used as some sort of sacrificial lamb. The thought makes her laugh and cringe at the same time.

Pete thanks the woman and takes Emmy’s hand, leading her into the tent. He makes a straight line for Ezekiel.

“Ezekiel?” Pete says timidly, “I hope you don’t mind. Emmy here is new to the church. She’s feeling a bit out of place.” Out of place is right, Emmy thinks. She’s seen enough True Crime documentaries to know a religious cult when she sees one.

“Ahh it’s wonderful to meet new members,” Ezekiel says turning to face Emmy and Pete, “I’m glad you’ve found the faith. Welcome. Unfortunately, though we will be starting soon…”

Emmy gets the distinct impression that Ezekiel is not pleased by Pete’s impromptu meet and greet.

“Oh I understand.” Emmy says, basically sighing with relief, “Thank you for taking the time…to meet me. Means…um, a lot. Thank you, Pete.” She turns to Pete who smiles warmly at her. She almost feels bad for lying. This must mean a lot to him.

As she makes her way back to the tents entrance, she bumps into someone. Someone who also looks like they want to make a run for it.

Hughie.

“Em…what…” Hughie starts but is cut off. Emmy feels a shiver make its way down her spin.

“Hughie don’t be rude, introduce your friend.” Homelander says with a forced smile.

Hughie stutters for a second too long, causing Emmy’s stomach to lurch. She decides to take it upon herself to get out of this. She extends her hand and smiles as warmly as possible.

“Emmy. I’m new to the church.” She starts, “I was just leaving. All of this is a bit too rich for my blood.”

Homelander shakes her hand and squeezes just that bit too tight. He uses it to pull Emmy into him and ‘whisper’ in her face, “You need to make friends with Starlight as well. Hughie here got in for free!��

His perfect grin beams brightly but everyone involved knows it’s laced with something more sinister. Emmy’s never met this man before, never even really seen or heard anything of him other than a face on TV.

But she’s scared.

Emmy smiles and laughs but knows that he sees her swallow around the large lump in her throat.

As Homelander pulls back, he lets go of Emmy’s hand and as much as she wants to rub the ache out of it, her pride won’t allow her to do so in his presence. His picture-perfect smile never falters and he eyes Hughie for a second too long. Emmy’s seen eye’s like his before. Eye’s that contain nothing but scorn and contempt. She feels like the air’s been sucked from her lungs.

The moment Ezekiel begins his speech, Emmy makes a hasty exit from the tent. She doesn’t glance back at Hughie but she knows he watches her leave. For a minute or two she walks in a straight line, head down, wanting to be as far away from that place as possible. She ignores the protests of the people she barges past until one of them grabs her arm, dragging her behind one of the nearest stalls.

Butcher spins Emmy round and shouts in the loudest whisper.

“Why the fuck were you in that tent eh? What the fuck is wrong with you!?” Butcher yells, gripping Emmy’s upper arms so hard it hurts. She can see he’s furious but unlike Homelander, there is nothing but desperation in his eyes.

“I…” Emmy wants to tell him. She was basically dragged there! And where were they!? They disappeared on her! If anyone should be mad it’s her. They should’ve given her a phone or something! But all that comes out is a garbled apology and one word. “Homelander”.

Butchers eye’s widen with what Emmy easily recognises as fear.

“What did he fuckin’ do? Emmy, what, what did that bastard fuckin’ do!” He says quickly, shaking her a little when she doesn’t answer quick enough.

“Nothing. He didn’t do anything.” Emmy says, feeling her mouth go dry, “But his eyes…” Emmy looks past Butcher and imagines them. She wants to tell him that his eye’s are so…bitter, so hateful. So dead.

Butcher sighs with relief and does the last thing Emmy could imagine. He pulls her into a bone crushing hug. She finds herself suddenly with her head against his firm chest and the smell of something distinctly him fills her nose. It’s comforting.

Butcher buries his nose into Emmy’s hair and inhales deeply. She smells like Frenchie’s crappy body wash but with a hint of him from the shirt she slept in. As quickly as he pulled her into his body, he pushes her away. Emmy hadn’t even had time to wrap her arms around him.

“Look, I gotta go do summit. Stay here ‘nd I’ll send MM over.” Butcher says, moving to leave. Emmy grabs his arm, feeling his muscles tense at her touch.

“Can I not come with you? I’m really sick of these religious fucks.” She says, drawing shocked gasps from the people around them close enough to hear. Butcher can’t help but smirk, “Fine but you gotta wait in tha car.”

As Emmy follows Butcher, she hears him growl a “fuck you want?” at some people who were less than thrilled at her choice of words. Emmy laughs.

………………………………………………….

In the car, Emmy fills Butcher in on how she ended up in the tent and her run in with Hughie. He’s not happy that Homelander has seen her face or that he seems a bit too interested in Hughie but the sheer panic he seemed to be in definitely dies down.

She waits in the car outside a house in a nice part of the city. Everything around her seems so…well, nice. She can’t imagine who someone like Butcher would know around here. But then she doesn’t really know him, does she?

When he comes storming from the house and pulls the car away with an earth-shattering screech, Emmy stays quiet. He’s clearly fucked off about something and Emmy would rather not push her luck twice in one day.

But now they’re sat outside a cemetery. And have been for about 15 minutes.

“Why are we here Butcher?” Emmy asks delicately, not wanting to break the silence too much too quickly. It feels like she’s talking to a kicked puppy. Trying to gain its trust without spooking it.

“You don’t have to tell me” she adds very quickly.

Butcher nods and gets out of the car, goes to the trunk and gets out a sledgehammer. He slams the trunk closed and takes off into the cemetery. Emmy just waits and hopes that no caretakers try to stop him from doing whatever he’s doing. She doubts that’ll end well.

He’s not gone long.

Once they’re back on the road he finally speaks again.

“MM’s gotta lead on a Compound V shipment so we’re gonna go meet him now. You might need this.” Butcher says and tosses Emmy’s matchbook into her lap, “Jus’ in case.”

Emmy pockets the matchbook and nods. She still doesn’t know the ins and outs of what Butcher and the boys do but if it’s about supes, it’s about Vought. And if it’s about Vought, Emmy wants to know.

Butcher glances over at Emmy as she nods and thinks back to the Expo. He was looking for her for ages. He’d gotten involved in this existential rant with an old fella and ‘misplaced’ her. Him and MM had split up and when he’d seen her leaving the VIP tent with her head hanging low, his heart just about stopped.

He kept his eye on her as he’d shoved people out of the way. Didn’t lose sight of her once. The closer he got the more he noticed how wide her eyes were, like she was in some kind of shock. If someone did something in that fucking tent, he’d murder every last person at the expo.

When he’d finally gotten to her, his blood was already pumping. He knows he grabbed her too hard but she’s a supe right? It wouldn’t hurt. Although the way she flinched certainly made it seem like it did.

But fuck, when she said Homelander…he felt bile rise up into his throat. He shouldn’t be so protective over this newbie supe but for some reason he is. He’s seen her pissed and he’s heard about what she does when threatened. But seeing her so wide-eyed and scared made her seem so small.

Why the fuck is he doing this to himself?

Before he could contemplate it any further, they arrive at the hospital. Joining MM outside.

“Took ya time.” MM greets, gaining a glare from his friend. Emmy gives him a small, silent wave.

When no one moves to lead on, Butcher hisses, “We fuckin’ doin’ this or wot?”

[bumbershots]

A CERTAIN ROMANCE

CHAPTER FOUR: SILENCE COMES AND GOES

Author’s note: Hello! We continue with this, I would like to thank everyone once again for all the likes and reblogs the story has gotten so far, couldn’t be happier! Enjoy (:

Story masterlist ** Word count: 2.9K **

It is possible that Harry is ignoring the big elephant in the room, as he spreads some jam in his crumpet, well aware of Fernando and Jack exchanging knowing looks. He takes a bite of the savoury treat and hopes none of them dare to confront him, at the same time he wants to be questioned about why he hasn't called Alma yet.

Harry spent the last two weeks grumpy and frustrated.

He's called his therapist way too many times. He has no idea where he went wrong in his healing process. They were back to square one, whispered his tired heart.

Jack is surprised too, his friend got on so well with Alma at the party and apparently even went the extra mile asking for her number then he spent the following fourteen days acting as if she didn’t exist. Didn't even text her like Gemma suggested. He sips his coffee and sighs for the millionth time that day.

The musician is infuriated at himself and desperate that he wants to have Fernando demand an explanation for his behaviour towards his sister. Harry's not a confrontational guy, but he's going mad. Might be losing it. He wanted to scream at the two men before him that he did plan on calling Alma, but then he got so sad. Now he's afraid it's too late.

"Do you want another one?" Fernando holds the plate with crumpets in front of Harry who takes one more and thanks him before grabbing the jam. "Do you reckon you'll be man enough to call my sister within the next couple of days?" Harry chokes on his food while Jack's laughter booms through their home.

Nobody has ever called him out like that. Harry's still unsure whether to be grateful or scared. Maybe a bit of both he thinks after composing himself again from the fit of coughs, he knows Fernando is still waiting for an answer.

"Is she upset about it?" A hint of relief and pride linger on Harry's voice. Jack shakes his head, knowing that he's avoiding the question. Something he's very good at.

"That's not what I asked." Fernando's clipped tone leaves no room for the musician to beat around the bush anymore.

"I was really nervous about calling her, kept putting it off until days turned into weeks... I'm not sure how to go about it," he plays with his rings and looks away from the inquisitive gaze of his companions.

"How did you get Taylor to go out with you?"

"What?" Harry and Jack ask at the same time.

"You must've asked her I guess," Fernando shrugs. "What is so scary about Alma that puts you off? Are you interested in just a shag and you're worried she'll decline or tell the media about it?" Harry is shaking his head vigorously and the dark haired architect leans a bit closer towards him, "you're so full of sh-”

"Alright let's take a break," Jack's soothing tone brings his house mate back from the rage path he was following. But Harry knew that he was right.

It had been a year already, he moved to a new house, one where his ex never set foot into and still her ghost was everywhere. He has this crazy need to destroy everything that can relate to her. Her favourite cardigan is kept away in a box full of Polaroids and books that are all her.

The real reason why he didn't dare to call Alma is because whatever he felt at the beginning of his previous relationship, or any other one, was at least ten times less intense, than what he was feeling now. Seeing the menace before them, his heart and mind decided to leave him courage-less towards the situation. It's less painful to think what could've been than to know it and see it being taken away from you. Again.

But he deserves to be happy, that's what Gemma reminded him the other day.

"I gotta go," Fernando announces before rising from his seat, walking inside the house and upstairs to his room. Jack tries to tidy up the table a bit, not daring to look at his apparently mute friend. When Fernando comes back down he steps outside to the patio where they had brunch, one last glance to a very ashamed Harry and he sighs. "Brigit's Bakery Classic Afternoon Tea Bus. Alma’s been dying to get tickets but never has the time to actually book it," he explains adjusting his jacket's collar. "It's not too late." With that he turns on his heel and leaves the house.

Harry takes their mugs and places them in the sink, he notices Jack is going around the kitchen putting away the butter and milk in the fridge.

"What are you waiting for Romeo?" The blue eyed man asks, stopping in front of a blushing Harry.

They're both quiet for a minute. Harry's heart is racing and can feel his hands get clammy. He hasn't felt someone's faith in a long time, and he's not sure if he's happy or pressured that Fernando and Jack are pushing him to call Alma, he doesn’t even know if she will give him a chance. Harry's wishing to be the kind of guy to take out his mobile and make the call, maybe even crack a witty joke that will have Alma laughing in that loud way he remembers and not be awkward with asking her out on a date. As if he wasn't completely mortified by being rejected.

Harry was sure he would ruin it, not just the call but the date and everything else that was actually going to happen between them without even trying first.

"Hello?" She answers after the third ring, confused at the unknown number calling her.

"Yeah it's me," Harry nods to Jack who urges him to finish whatever sentence he's trying to form, "I believe I owe you some coffee."

"Harry?" Alma tries to fight back a laugh. A wide smile splitting her face after recognising who is the mystery caller.

"Yes! Sorry I forgot you didn't have my number." Jack is red with second hand embarrassment for his friend and decides to start the dishwasher just to keep his eyes from the train wreck happening in his kitchen. "I'm sorry for not calling sooner."

"You're calling now, 's all that matters... I'd love to get that coffee. Next Thursday works for you?" He nods feverishly and remembers he's on the phone.

"Of course, I'll pick you up at five if that's alright."

"Make it half past five please, that's when my shift ends. I'll text you the address." She throws the latter smoothly as an excuse to initiate conversation until they meet again and Harry is oblivious about it.

"Sure great, perfect I'm... really looking forward to seeing you," he plays with the tea towel on the counter, his back turned to Jack, a million butterflies fluttering in his stomach when he hears the coy chuckle his confession got out of her. "Have a good day, see you later."

"See you later, Harry" Alma's goodbye is full of hope and endearment, just like the one he got before she walked away from him that morning after Freddie’s birthday party.

After ending the call, he mentally scolds himself for dreading it so much. It went so much better than expected, even got a laugh out of her. Perhaps Harry needed to stop making decisions based upon his fears and more taking in consideration the other person. He always thought he knew best, it's what he's been told for so many years and although he needs to be making big choices most of the time, perhaps now he could share that responsibility. Felt dead nice for a change.

"That wasn't so bad." He admits to Jack before drying the now clean dishes with a towel.

"I'm proud of you, now tell me, where are you guys going for that coffee?" Jack's eyes are full of curiosity and excitement, it's impossible for Harry not to feel a chill go down his spine at the prospect of planning the date. He thinks about what Fernando suggested, but it would be too obvious that it wasn't his idea entirely.

Alma deserves something exclusively planned by him.

"Don't know yet, perhaps somewhere nice and quiet" he ponders and his friend agrees.

Last time Harry had a proper first date was about two years ago or so. He cooked aubergine parmigiana following Jamie Oliver's recipe and baked some biscuits for dessert that he enjoyed with his companion overlooking the Pacific Ocean from his home's balcony. Back then it seemed to be the right choice to keep it low-key, a simple dinner at his, no risk at all to be bothered or watched. But Harry knew that at some point it got old, being overly discreet was easily mistaken for being ashamed of the relationship. That kind of thing can do a lot to someone's confidence, little by little until it's all too much to bear.

If he could only learn not to care about the world's prying eyes.

Harry doesn't want to drag anyone into the scrutiny of the media until he knows it's an incorruptible bond. The inevitable thought of forever, something he believes might not exist for him, at times. He did think Taylor was it, even Kendall for a while, which is why he dated more publicly back then, until she came along and the love Harry felt was so grand it made him overly protective of them. Countless times he tried to explain that this was the first time something was working in spite of all the circumstances that came with his life and he was trying to cherish it, keep it to himself. Nurture it until it was as tough as old boots.

That night was spent writing down ideas for that first date. Number one was The river café, near Putney Bridge, a place free of paparazzi. Number two, Rail house café, lovely spot to share dinner. Number three The sanctuary café, located in a beautiful building with a quirky environment. Number four and his personal favourite Lola's bakery, their service was so warm and intimate, he remembers the cinnamon Chelsea bun and his mouth waters instantly. So, drawing a big circle around the fourth option he smiles before going to bed that night.

Saturday morning finds Harry at his grandparents’ old home, carrying a bag full of ingredients for a vegetarian lasagna he is planning to cook for his grandfather and his mum. He immediately banishes Anne from helping in the kitchen. She observed him follow the recipe, cooking for no longer than ten minutes the garlic, thyme and aubergine, and then crumble over the chilli carefully. He lets her grate the Parmesan when the sauce isn’t thickening and reducing like it was supposed to. With a bump of her hip, she nodded towards a couple of tomatoes, Harry smiled before tipping them in, breaking them with a spoon and five minutes later, the sauce was ready.

His mother is a marvellous woman, like the good son he is, Harry doesn't want to make her sad, ever. The last time he visited her, recently broken hearted, they spent it baking, cooking, eating sweets and drinking hot chocolate at the rear terrace. Once he had enough of moping around, he decided to make it up to her and create good memories from that visit. They explored the local parklands as if it was the first time, shared ice cream, got tipsy on cheap red wine and chatted from dusk till dawn.

A few hours later, after eating the delicious meal and tidying up the kitchen afterwards, Harry watches his mum talking to his grandad, holding his shaky hand in hers and caressing it in a soothing way. The elder man’s Parkinson is getting worse with time, he feels so useless, specially because it affects his favourite people. He wants to know what his mother is thinking when she joins him back in the kitchen. There is some anguish dancing in her kind eyes, but Harry knows better than to push her to share something she is not ready to.

"I have a date next Thursday," he chokes out, in hopes of distracting her, and it works. Anne's head whips towards her youngest child, evidently shocked and yet proud. It's been years since Harry shared that kind of information with her.

"A proper date?"

"Yes," he wants to add how nervous it makes him. "I dunno how serious it'll get... just met her once, properly I mean, we saw each other on the tube's carriage three times prior to it. Coincidentally of course, Gem said it is something straight out of a film."

"Who is she?" His mother is giving him that look, the one that says how giddy she is to know absolutely everything about the person that got her son so skittish, that he started to rearrange the containing of the cupboards entirely.

"Her name is Alma," he doesn't know where to start, if he spills all the ways in which he thinks she is wonderful, they'll end up pulling an all-nighter.

"And she's a...?"

"Cashier during the week, Spanish teacher on the weekends and occasional interviewer for her Youtube channel." Anne raises her eyebrows, impressed and wondering why such a busy girl agreed to go on a date. Must like him a lot of course, she thinks watching her son pour hot water on a mug, and dunking a tea bag in it afterwards.

"Where did you meet her if not on the tube?'' She is curious and weary. This wouldn't be the first time her youngest spawn overlooked certain things from strangers. Very little things in Harry's life were coincidences nowadays.

"Remember Jack Robinson?" his mum nodded, how could she forget the cheeky chap that helped Harry escape almost every night from his dad's house in the summer, just to go skate in Southbank's center until midnight. Anne admitted to not liking the bloke for a while, but gave him another chance after watching him grow into a responsible adult. "He's in charge of my home renovation, extension whatever it is called. Invited me to Freddie's birthday party and she was there." The dreamy look on his eyes when reminiscing the moment brought out a wide smile on his mum's face followed by her loud laughter.

"Oh Harry, you've got that look." it was the truth. He looked completely gobsmacked by his mother's reaction, but he couldn’t deny the peace he felt when knowing that she was already fond of the girl that he couldn’t get out of his mind.

"It’s too soon to tell!” He doesn’t want to dive into it, not yet. 

"How did you really meet? I want all the details." Anne asked, taking a seat at the coffee table and Harry told her everything.

From the first glance he stole her way to the last phone call he had yesterday at Jack and Fernando's house, his hands flew several times to tussle his hair and the dimple on his left cheek was exquisite, when telling his mother, how she asked him to dance with her. He spared no detail, from her intoxicating Moschino perfume to her raspy accented voice. By the time he finished, his mum's mug was empty but her heart was full. For so long she wondered if she would ever witness the beauty of Harry in love again and enjoy first-hand the way he spoke about that person in the sweetest manner, the high-pitched tone of his voice when finally admitting how nervous he actually was about this first date.

"Right, well in that case, stop thinking about how everything is going to go wrong." Easier said than done, Harry thinks but nods. "I'm sure whatever you planned will sweep her off her feet." Anne knew how much of a romantic her boy was, he went all out in that department. His best quality and Achilles heel.

"If the cupcakes from that place don't... I could literally do it." Harry plucks a banana from the fruit bowl before them and narrows his eyes when his mum rolls her eyes at him playfully.

His mother's reassurance made him feel less hopeless, the next day when they went to Sheffield's city center, she even picked out a couple of new mugs. 'Just in case we have new visitors at home.' Harry groaned but failed to hide the dreamy look in his eyes, he even crossed his fingers behind his back as he watched her pay for the cups. The thought of Alma meeting his mother in the near future —and the rest of his loved ones— excited him to an unfamiliar degree, like the first time he saw the seaside with his own eyes at a very young age, like that time he sang in front of a considerable amount of people, like a warm hug of his late grandmother. The idea that she may like him enough to agree to a second date is stuck on his brain, despite that they haven't even survived the first one.

Anne saw him enjoy himself the rest of that afternoon and the next morning before he had to go back to London. She sighed and watched him drive away, standing in her front door for a few more minutes, rejoicing on the memory of Harry's toothy grin. Usually she was careful and waiting for the other shoe to drop, but not this time. There was a bit of certainty in the unfamiliar situation, something she couldn't quite put her finger on, she decided to patiently wait and see. She hummed a familiar tune while putting away the new additions to her crockery. The same song her son decided to play on his journey back home.

Qué será, será. Whatever will be, will be. The future's not ours to see. Qué será, será.

///

Let me know if you like the story! *** Join the taglist!

///

TAG LIST: @laurxn-robinson @mellamolayla

Next chapter

[poetic-beats]

Re: Self Destruct, I just wanted to say that you are a lovely person, and your diagnoses and destructive patterns do not define you. I hope you hold onto hope and keep growing; you are worthy of good things. I don't know if this helps, but I've been happily married to a woman with BPD for over a decade now, and while it hasn't always been a bed of roses (I have my own issues too), there is so much more to us than our fuckups. It's a bumpy road - don't be hard on yourself for falling sometimes.

For a decade? You managed to make it work? Thank you for this. I have been with my fiance for 5 years this October. He also has his own issues Asperger’s & some other stuff.  I just..I keep failing. I have a major MAJOR fear of abandonment like major and something happened in our past to sort of make it more valid but not valid. Like it’s not valid but in my head my bpd says oh because of this it’s valid. I don’t know it’s just I do things that I shouldn’t horrible things...like invading his privacy and It is SO horribly wrong and I know that.  But it’s like I get this thought in my head and it niggles at me day after day after day and then I have real life things that have happened that sort of make it more real in my mind as actually being a thing that could be true.  And because I’ve had things in my past to do with lies and such I am SO so horribly paranoid about being lied too and the thing is it’s not about how big or small the lie is I just need complete honesty and not even the average person is honest about EVERYTHING...but I...I’ve always been this uber honest person to the point teachers used to continually say at parent’s evenings sometimes Erin is too honest for her own good. I think it’s also tied in with my anxiety that causes major guilt around lying for example when I hid my self harm I actually never lied as soon as I was asked if I self harmed I told my parents I broke down and told them. I couldn’t lie. There has been few occasions where I’ve lied. Like obviously I’m not talking about the tiniest white lies saying you’ve done a chore and you haven’t. I mean more important lies than that but yet ones apparently most people find small but to me they aren’t and I have major issues around trust fear of abandonment and it all comes down to having open honest discussions. The issue is because of my partner’s trauma in his past he suffered major abuse and because of his Asperger’s he shuts down he’s not communicative in anyway possible. I imagine being married to a woman with BPD for a decade you’ll understand we can be very emotionally charged and we need that constant validation and when we notice ONE tiny thing off that most people wouldn’t think twice about we instantly jump to paranoia and that’s me. I struggle with his Asperger’s coping mechanisms and such because I am the pure opposite. He can’t talk about his emotions easily and me...I am a ball of emotions that never stops talking. I can’t always get that emotional needs met but at the same time he will go out of his way to put ME first my emotional needs first and I know I cannot ask for more. I just feel like I do these things because I am scared and I feel like I don’t know I don’t know why I do this. Why I invade his social media why I do this stuff. Like why? It’s like I want to find something to upset myself over OR it is like the paranoia takes over in my head and I just...it is all I can think about so I just..spend hours down a rabbit hole and betray his trust for nothing...for what...my stupid thoughts in my head.  I’ve been trying so hard to get past this and I HAVE been making good progress. Like I’ve been doing good but it’s like when I do relapse into old behaviours it’s just so SO bad. There is so much stuff about people with BPD being abusive etc etc and I am so afraid of being what people expect.  I am also fighting to get therapy and treatment. I noticed I was doing better but it seems that when I am under stress the BPD gets worse and idk sometimes it is so hard to do all of this without self harming without i dont know.  I don’t know how to get past my self destructive behaviours. I thought I was doing so much better and then I go and fuck everything up. It’s not fair on him regardless of the past I shouldn’t be doing that you know. I SHOULDNT and I just feel like everything people label borderlines as right now. How do you ever get past your wife’s fears of abandonment? The paranoia? The need for validation which can become too much for some people?  Obviously she might not be the same as me there’s 9 criteria we only need 7 to be diagnosed maybe she doesn’t experience these things the way I do but if she does please reach out to me again and just..how..how did you guys make it work?  Sometimes I feel like I’m doomed to the symptom that says borderlines often have SHORT LIVED relationships.  even though we’ve been together for 5 years nearly I feel like one day it’ll be the straw that breaks the camels back so to speak and he always says thats not how it is hes in this with me for the long haul. But man my mind is SO fucked up right now. I just...idk. Thank you though. I’m gonna keep reading your message over because it is very comforting to see someone whose maintained and has a good loving relationship with someone with borderline for a decade that...just thank you for reaching out to me.