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steddieas-shegoes · 1 year

Note

Request: wrong number au, Eddie texts Gareth something personal but puts in 1 wrong number & ends up texting Steve. The two of them hit it off & start chatting & then when they meet IRL they are completely head over heels in love & its cute as fuck

MY LOVE MY LOVE MY LOVE!!! LOVE A GOOD WRONG NUMBER AU!!! I can't believe I've never written it before now. I also had to actually include Gareth because I am actually obsessed with him lately, and I just think it's really neat that we can make these characters our own. This was such a fun and cute request! I didn't do the inappropriate route because I thought this was hilarious so sorry about that. I made up for it with something else! - Mickala ❤️

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GARE BEAR! You won’t believe it but i dropped my phone in a sewer. Lost everything.

He had never been so happy about having his closest friends’ numbers memorized. His phone was somewhere under the streets of Chicago, floating through dirty water and sewage, dying a slow and painful death.

He texted everyone else one at a time, let them know he had a new number and to completely delete the old one because it would never be recovered.

They were used to things like this happening; He lost his phone annually at this point and it was cheaper just to get a new number than transfer everything to a new one.

He went to dial Wayne, the old school part of him insisting on phone calls instead of texts still, when Gareth’s name popped up with a new text.

Not sure who Gare Bear is, but sorry about your phone. That’s shitty.

Eddie let out a loud laugh.

did you mean to make a pun?

Did it make you laugh?

yes

Then yes.

Eddie sat down on a bench, entirely focused on his conversation with this stranger.

Did you find your Gare Bear yet?

Not yet but i think i’m pretty happy talking to you for now

Smooth, Eddie.

Admittedly, he was in a hell of a dry spell.

Going on almost two years, actually.

A little flirting with a stranger never hurt anybody, not when he clearly needed some practice.

Not sure if your Gare Bear would like it very much though

Wait, what?

Eddie stared at his phone, trying to comprehend what that could mean. Why would Gareth not want him talking to a stranger?

I hope you find your partner though!

Oh.

Oh!

Eddie hit the call button in the corner before he could even register what he was doing.

“Hello?”

Oh no, he sounded hot.

“Hi. So, Gareth is very much not my partner. He probably actually wishes I would really forget his number,” Eddie rushed out.

“Um. Okay?”

“He’s been my best friend for ten years and he thinks I’m a mess. Not a partner,” Eddie further clarified.

“Got it. Not a partner.”

“Yes, exactly.”

They stayed silent for a moment before Eddie coughed.

“I’m Eddie, by the way.”

“Steve. Sorry about your phone, seriously that sucks,” he sounded genuinely apologetic, like he personally threw Eddie’s phone in the sewer.

“Oh, no big deal. I lose my phone more often than I go out with someone,” Eddie said.

Why did he say that?

Steve let out a laugh and it was like music.

Eddie couldn’t help the smile taking over his face at his laugh, already knew he wasn’t gonna be able to let this guy go without learning more about him.

“So you’re, what? Celibate?” Steve asked.

“Far from it. Well, maybe not far from it. Temporarily, maybe. It’s been a while,” Eddie admitted.

“How long?” Steve asked, a loud bang coming from his end of the phone. “Sorry, I had to go outside for some privacy.”

Eddie wasn’t going to read into that. He wasn’t.

“Two years give or take. I mean I’m not counting shitty dates that ended before they got worse. So, yeah. Two years.”

“Been a year for me, but. Yeah, I get it. My last relationship didn’t end on the best terms. She decided I was too in love with her I guess,” Steve sighed, voice sounding pained.

She.

Steve was probably straight.

There was no way he’d be lucky enough for Steve to like men.

Or for Steve to like him.

“I can’t really imagine breaking up with someone because they loved me too much. I’m usually the one who falls too hard,” Eddie admitted.

“Yeah, well, same here,” Steve sounded sad, a bit withdrawn.

Eddie wanted to hear him laugh again.

“I doubt either of us have ever fallen as hard as my phone did down a drain,” Eddie said sadly.

Steve let out a loud laugh and Eddie smiled.

“This might sound crazy, but I’m kind of glad your phone decided to live in the sewers,” Steve said when he finally calmed down. “And maybe a little too happy that you typed your friend’s number wrong.”

“Oh really? Why’s that?”

Was this flirting? Was he successfully having a flirtatious conversation with a potentially very hot guy?

“So I can be bold and ask if you maybe wanted to meet up somewhere?” Steve asked hesitantly.

“So you’re in Chicago?” Eddie asked.

“Yeah. You?”

“For the last five years, yeah.”

“You busy tonight?”

Eddie’s heart stopped.

He was really going to meet up with a stranger just because he liked his laugh and hoped he was hot.

He’d done more with less.

“Yeah, actually. I’m getting dinner with this guy I accidentally texted,” Eddie smirked, looking down at his feet.

“Dinner? What a lucky guy. Where are you going?” Steve sounded amused.

“Well, it depends on what he likes. I’ve been craving some pierogies. Ever been to Staropolska?” Eddie asked.

Gareth’s family owned it, and he used to eat there two or three times a week while they were in college, usually working off his bill in the kitchen doing dishes after.

He hadn’t been in a couple months, work keeping him busy and his budget being pretty tight when he moved into a studio apartment by himself.

He had enough to treat himself tonight though.

“The one on Milwaukee? Yeah. One of my favorite places to get devolay,” Steve sounded surprised that he knew it.

“You won’t believe this, but the friend I was trying to text when I got you, his family owns that place.”

“No way! Then we have to. We owe it to the guy who has almost my exact phone number,” Steve responded.

“Meet you there at seven?” Eddie asked, suddenly more nervous.

“Seven sounds good.”

“Okay.”

Steve giggled. Eddie fell in love.

“We should probably hang up.”

“Should we?” Eddie asked, not wanting to stop talking to him yet.

“Yes, I have to do my hair. Gotta impress the guy who drops his phone in the sewer and texts strangers about it.”

“He sounds like a loser. Don’t put too much effort in,” Eddie sighed. “But okay. See you at seven.”

“See you then.”

They both stayed on the line for a minute.

“Okay. For real. Bye,” Steve laughed.

“Bye, Stevie.”

He hung up before he could convince himself to talk to him for the rest of the afternoon.

He breathed out a loud sigh, smiling as he realized he had a date.

He dialed Gareth’s real number immediately.

“Gareth, I have a date!”

“What is this number, Eddie?”

“Oh, I dropped my phone in the sewers. Not important. I have a date!”

“Jesus Christ. Okay. Come over then.”

—-----------------------------------

Gareth had been his pre-date hype man since high school, though he wasn’t very good at it.

Mostly he calmed Eddie’s nerves and helped make sure his hair didn’t look like he just woke up, which was often its unfortunate state of being.

“So, you don’t know this guy,” Gareth said from his bed.

“No.”

“And you talked for like two seconds and decided you’re in love with him,” he continued.

“Yes.”

“And you think this is totally normal and sane?”

“I didn’t say that. But we just…I dunno. We clicked. I haven’t been that at ease with someone in a long time. It felt natural,” Eddie fell back on his bed, starfishing so his arm and leg hit Gareth’s legs.

“Dude, I’m not discouraging it. I’m happy for you. I just don’t want you to be disappointed if it isn’t as easy when you meet,” Gareth said softly.

“Yeah, thanks. I think it’ll be okay, though.”

“Alright. Tell babcia I’m coming by tomorrow for lunch.”

Eddie sat up and gave Gareth a quick hug.

“Thanks Gare Bear!”

—-------------------------------------------

He arrived 20 minutes early so he could sneak in the back to say hi to Gareth’s grandmother, who still insisted on getting her hands on the food every day for a couple of hours despite being nearly 80 years old.

“Babcia!”

“Eddie! My kochany! You forget to visit and I forget what you look like!” she rushed over, flour and oil stains all over her apron.

He should have kept some distance so his shirt didn’t get ruined, but he ignored the part of his brain telling him to look perfect for his date so he could get a hug.

“You know I have to watch my money,” he said against her shoulder.

“And you know I feed you for free if you clean up after yourself. No excuse,” she pulled away and looked him over. “You look handsome. Why?”

Eddie put his hands on his hips.

“What? Don’t I always look handsome?”

“Of course, but this is different. Your hair is smooth and you smell like the perfume store,” she smirked. “Is it a girl? Or a boy? Or a someone?”

“It’s a boy. We’ve never met in person, so I wanted to make a good first impression,” he admitted.

“Oh! How lovely! What’s his name?” She was back to kneading dough, but kept her eyes on him.

“Steve. He actually has been here before, loves the devolay?”

Babcia froze.

“Steve? Oh goodness.” She turned to the sink and washed her hands, muttering under her breath about something.

Eddie’s heart sank. Babcia didn’t seem happy about this.

“What’s wrong? You know him?”

“Oh, yes.”

“Is he not a good guy? Has he been mean to you? I’ll call and cancel right now,” he insisted, reaching for his phone in his pocket.

“No, no. Nothing like that. He is a very sweet boy. He got broken up with in this restaurant a few months back. Tore me to pieces. He just sat here for hours crying. I moved him to a corner booth for his privacy and he left me a $100 tip and ever since then when he comes in I make sure to give him as many szarlotka as he wants.” She touched Eddie’s shoulder. “You be good to him. He has a nice heart.”

Eddie’s mind raced.

Why had Steve agreed to come here for a date if this is where he’d been broken up with? Why did he even bother coming back if it held such bad memories?

What if he didn’t see this as a date?

The front door chimed and he heard the employee at the front welcome someone.

“He will be good for you, drogi.”

Eddie nodded before making his way to the front, stopping in his tracks when he saw the most beautiful man he’d ever seen standing at the podium, talking to the employee with a smile.

“That’s him,” Babcia said from behind him. “Go get him.”

She shoved him forward, nearly making him trip, which caught the attention of Steve.

He looked over with a curious smile, and then realization seemed to hit him.

“Steve?” Eddie managed to ask, loud enough to be heard over the few full tables in the restaurant.

“Eddie?” he asked back, hesitantly moving towards him.

“I, um,” Eddie started, then cleared his throat. “I usually sit by the window, if that’s okay?”

“That’s perfect,” Steve nodded.

It was cliche, like the room around them closed into just them existing together, like the stars had aligned exactly right for this moment to happen.

They sat down at the table Eddie usually sat at, staring across the table at each other in slight awe.

Eddie really hoped that Steve was having the same feelings he was.

But one thing was stopping Eddie from being completely enraptured.

“Is this a date?” he asked suddenly.

“What?” Steve seemed surprised by his question. “I mean, yeah. I’d like it to be. I thought it was.”

Eddie nodded once, but remained quiet, thinking.

“Oh God, it wasn’t, was it? You were just being nice. What is it with this restaurant? If I didn’t love the food so much or babcia, I would never step foot here again, I swear-”

Eddie put his hand on Steve’s to calm him down, frown on his face.

“Woah. What?”

“I just. I don’t have the best history with dates here and I guess I didn’t learn the first time something bad happened, and now I’m being too much too fast again in this place and-”

Eddie pulled Steve’s hand up to his face, placing a soft kiss to his knuckles.

“Stevie, calm down. This is a date. I’ll have as many dates here as you want to to get rid of whatever negative stuff you associate with this place. Babcia would hate that I ruined this place for you,” he said quietly.

Steve seemed to relax at his words.

And if you wanna tell me about what happened, you can. If it’ll help,” Eddie offered.

Before Steve could reply, Gareth’s cousin, Ben, came to take their order.

It was a quick order, both knowing exactly what they wanted, and then Steve looked back at him.

“It’s just. My last girlfriend, who I was with for almost three years, dumped me here. It was kind of out of the blue for me, and I had a really hard time that night.”

Eddie felt his heart break.

How could someone do that to Steve? He didn’t need to know him better to know that he didn’t deserve that, especially not if babcia had taken him under her wing so quickly.

“She must be awful to have let you go like that,” Eddie squeezed Steve’s hand in his, resisting the urge to go to his side of the table and hold him.

Steve shrugged and looked down at their hands.

“I mean, I should have known. She was never much for romance or spending time together that didn’t involve work or school. I was looking at engagement rings and she was looking at apartments to get away from me. I was just…really blinded by what I thought was love,” Steve smiled sadly at him.

“It wasn’t?”

“Well, it may have been a type of love. It was more comfort than anything. She was kind of all I had for the first year we were together, and I think I just ignored how unhealthy that was for both of us. And then I met Robin in college, and she was like the opposite of Nancy in every way. A few months before Nancy broke up with me, I told her that Robin’s parents kicked her out when she came out to them and that she needed a place to stay until we graduated. She agreed, then never made any attempt at getting to know her. And I didn’t read into it, Nancy isn’t like, super talkative with people she isn’t already close with, and Robin just kinda stayed to herself when Nancy was home.” Steve took a shaky breath. “But it turns out she didn’t bother getting to know her because she already knew she was gonna break up with me and leave the apartment to me and Robin, so.she just. Didn’t bother. Robin warned me, but I didn’t listen.”

Eddie wanted to cry.

Steve’s voice was full of pain, but not in a way that told him he still loved her, or still hoped they would get back together. More that she broke a part of him that he still hadn’t been able to fix no matter how hard he tried or wanted to.

“Was she jealous?” Eddie asked, trying so hard to understand what could have happened.

“I dunno. I mean, Robin’s a lesbian, and I definitely never had feelings for her anyway. Nancy was always so sure of herself, I can’t imagine she’d be jealous.”

“It sounds like she didn’t appreciate you very much.”

“What do you mean?” Steve didn’t sound mad, just curious.

“Well, she didn’t even make an effort to get to know your best friend, right? And it sounds like she was too busy focusing on her future to even think about what you looked like in it, and instead of trying to plan it with you, she made a future for her. She sounds a bit selfish,” Eddie shrugged.

Instead of being upset, Steve laughed.

God, Eddie loved that laugh.

“Sorry, it’s just that you sound exactly like Robin. You’d probably be two peas in a pod.”

“Tell me about her,” Eddie genuinely wanted to know more about the person who kept Steve going.

Their food arrived in the middle of the story of how Steve and Robin met, but it didn’t stop him from continuing.

Eddie listened with a fond smile, filling in Steve’s gaps of silence as he chewed a bite of food with questions or something related to what he’d been talking about.

It was easy.

It was fun.

Halfway through the meal, Steve’s foot rested against one of his and it felt like electricity shooting through his bones.

Eddie told him about Gareth, and his family who had pretty much adopted him when they both moved here from a small town in Indiana. He talked about his uncle who raised him for most of his life, who visited every Christmas despite being on a really tight budget.

Time passed quickly, but not at all.

They hadn’t realized how long they’d been sitting there until babcia came out without her apron to hand deliver an apple tart.

“You boys enjoy. I’ll see you both soon!” she said as she smacked a kiss on top of each of their heads.

Both of them blushed, but tried to cover it up with a bite of food.

As they finished, Steve looked outside to see how dark it was, how few people were left walking the streets.

“Guess we should head out,” he muttered, sounding like that was the last thing he wanted to do.

“Would you wanna come to my place? We don’t have to do anything except talk, I promise. I just don’t really want this to end yet,” Eddie suggested.

“Really? I haven’t bored you?” Steve asked, just a hint of self-deprecation in his tone.

Eddie shook his head.

“Not at all. I’d really like to get a chance to love you the way you deserve,” Eddie said.

Steve’s eyes widened.

Eddie should back up, should say something less intense.

But if this ruined it, then at least he said what he was thinking.

“You think you could love me?” Steve asked, barely more than a whisper.

“I think I already do a little,” Eddie admitted.

Steve blinked at him for a moment, mouth slightly agape.

“I need to kiss you,” he finally said.

“Now? Here?” Eddie smiled.

“Now. Here.”

“I won’t stop you.”

Steve stood from the table and stood in front of Eddie, placing both hands on his cheeks and leaning down.

Their lips brushed in a barely-there kiss, softer than Eddie expected.

Steve stayed there for a moment, eyes closed, and Eddie couldn’t help the words tumbling from him.

“You’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”

If someone had said it to him, he would think they were just trying to get him into their bed, but that wasn’t the case here and he hoped Steve knew that.

“People used to call me a charmer, but I don’t think I’m half as good at it as you,” Steve whispered, his breath ghosting against Eddie’s lips.

“Just honest.”

“Take me home,” Steve said, opening his eyes and staring at Eddie, his eyes glowing with something close to love.

—-------------------------------------

They stayed up all night, never doing more than kissing and mapping out patterns on each others’ skin.

They talked about everything, even the painful parts of life, even the parts that they hadn’t shared with anyone else.

It didn’t make any sense that someone who had been a stranger not even 24 hours ago could already mean so much.

When the sun started to shine through the curtains of Eddie’s apartment, Steve sighed and buried his face in Eddie’s neck.

“I have to go to work,” though he burrowed his entire body further into the bed and Eddie’s side.

“You could call in sick,” Eddie suggested, pressing a kiss to the top of Steve’s head.

“Robin would kill me.”

He and Robin worked together as team teachers at an elementary school. When one of them missed, it left the other with 34 kids alone.

Plus, Steve loved his job, worked hard to be a teacher, and hated missing a day if he didn’t need to.

“Maybe you could bring Robin here after work? I can make dinner?” Eddie’s job was pretty easy, marketing for an Indie record label based out of New York remotely really kept him busy for a couple hours a day and the rest of the time was spent writing his own music.

Steve sat up and looked down at him, his hair ruffled from Eddie running his fingers through it for the last eight hours.

“You’d wanna meet Robin?”

“Yeah, if you want me to. She sounds like fun.”

Steve started crying.

“Oh shit, I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to make you cry. Good job, Munson, already ruined something good,” Eddie was reaching for a tissue from his bedside table.

“No, no, I’m sorry. I’m just tired and emotional. And just. It means a lot that you’d wanna meet her,” Steve said between gasps for air as he continued to cry.

“Of course I do. I could even invite Gareth over, too, if you want. He won’t believe that our date went well,” Eddie joked, brushing the tears away from Steve’s cheeks.

“I’d love to meet him,” Steve said, sniffling.

“When can you guys get here?”

“Usually we’re done by four, but sometimes we stay later to finish grading stuff. Maybe we should say six?”

“Got it. Any allergies?”

“Robin is allergic to shellfish. She says she is. I think she just doesn’t like them,” Steve rolled his eyes.

“No shellfish, got it. Any preferences, my love?”

Steve blushed at the term of endearment, looking down before he leaned in to kiss Eddie softly.

“Anything you make will be great.”

“You wanna borrow some clothes for work?” Eddie asked.

“Do you have any business casual stuff?”

Eddie gagged.

“Unfortunately, it’s required for the job sometimes. Far left of the closet should have something,” he nodded towards the small closet by the bathroom.

Eddie watched as Steve walked over and picked out his only pair of khaki pants and a navy button down. Steve looked back at him and winked before he nodded towards the bathroom.

“Could use some help working the shower if you’re willing to,” he smirked.

Eddie jumped up from the bed and ran into the bathroom, ignoring the way Steve was laughing.

“The hot water is tricky sometimes. I should probably get in there too to make sure it stays hot,” Eddie said as he stripped off his pants.

“Definitely. Wouldn’t want me to get cold,” Steve put a hand on his shoulder to slow him down. “Kiss me?”

Eddie leaned in to kiss him slowly, letting his tongue brush along his lips just to get a taste.

“Okay?” Eddie checked in.

“Yeah. You remember what you said last night? About loving me like I deserve?”

Eddie nodded.

“I want you to. And I want to love you back.”

“I think we can arrange that.”

#steddie #steve harrington #eddie munson #stranger things #gareth emerson #wrong number au #modern au #ficlet #request #getting together

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nataliasquote · 6 months

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I Know What You Are | n romanoff

Summary: The bane of Natasha’s existence had finally slipped up but when sent to eliminate her, feeling get in the way far too easily.

Warnings: blood, weapons, character death (oops), angst with no happy ending :)

wc: 5.9k (I got really carried away!)

note: this is part 2 of the ideas that were given to me by @katyaromanoffpetrova so thank you love ❤️ this was fun

-⧗-

“I’ve got your six,” a familiar voice crackled through the redhead’s earpiece. She rolled her shoulders back and adjusted her grip on her gun, eyes darting across the smoke covered landscape that loomed before her. They’d picked a good vantage point but it was far too exposed for the assassin’s liking.

Natasha turned away from the edge and nodded to Clint, who’s arrow was already strung in his bow, ready to strike at a moment’s notice. Her flash of red hair was the last thing he saw before she disappeared down the dark stairwell and back out onto the street.

“How long are we going to be circling like this, Nat?” Clint asked, a little out of breath as he finally caught up to his partner. Her eyes were distant, darting between the loosened bricks of the wall they were currently hiding behind. “Are you sure she’s here?”

“She is, I can feel it.” The echoes of gunfire and explosions rattled through their skulls, although the assassins were quite deaf to it now. Clint more than Nat. They clearly weren’t the only ones disturbed by the actions of one woman and her organisation.

A particularly loud bang went off nearby and Clint winced, his hand flying up to the hearing aid in his right ear. Natasha would have sent her best friend a sympathetic look if something hadn’t caught her eye across the desolate square.

A flash of silver, glinting in the orange sunlight as golden hour descended across the war zone.

“Got her.” Natasha scrambled up from her place and raced after the dark figure, her movements as silent and deadly as the night. Frustration spurred her onwards. This woman had been the source of Shield’s stress for months, but that was all about to end.

Her target’s preferred methods rather intrigued Natasha, who was all about efficiency when it came to killing. Guns were always in her arsenal, widow bites too. Her thighs often felt empty without a full holster. But the mystery woman never touched a gun. She was a master with a blade, stabbing and slashing her enemies with a brutal grace, silently dancing across the battlefield leaving disaster in her wake.

She was a free spirit, which drove Natasha mad. No one should be allowed this amount of freedom with her track history and there was no way Natasha was going to return to Shield empty handed. Not today.

The cacophony of noise ceased suddenly and Natasha felt Clint’s presence on the rooftop to her right. The hazy air was still so Natasha stuck to the shadows, the rough brick pressing through the fabric on her suit as she skulked around a corner.

But a sharp pain struck the back of her knee and she collapsed to the ground, a grunt of pain escaping her chapped lips.

A five inch blade thrown with horrifying accuracy had lodged itself in her upper calf ,only inches away from her knee. The pain was nauseating, but Natasha barely had a chance to properly process it before two dust covered boots stepped into her eyeline. With another grunt, she looked up at the figure before her, determined not to show pain on her face.

Her icy glare was met with a mask-covered face, one she knew well. The black mask was made of hard plastic and resembled two hands that covered the wearer’s mouth and nose - basically a muzzle. But playfully glinting eyes peaked over it and it was obvious they were paired with a smirk. Gloved hands twirled a knife, almost daring Natasha to step up and attack. But the redhead had been knocked off her game by those very eyes that taunted her.

She knew them…

Too well.

She used to love them. And as those gloved hands moved to slowly lift the mask from her face, Natasha felt her heart fall into the pit of her stomach.

“Y/n?” She dared to ask, voice barely above a whisper. She got no reply, but the subtle tensing of her opponent’s muscles told her all she needed to know. Fate was laughing at her. The woman she thought had been ripped away from her when they were teenagers was now towering above her, forcing suppressed memories of the Red Room to come crashing down onto both women, leaving them breathless.

This moment of hesitation was all Clint needed to fire, but Y/n was one step ahead. She’d seen him on the roof and knew what he was waiting for, so by the time his arrow had implanted itself into the wall, she had disappeared into the smoke, leaving Natasha alone. The knife in her leg and the rubble indenting her skin did nothing to shake her from her mind, still staring into the empty space where the woman had just been.

Clint came rushing over and dropped to his knee to inspect Natasha’s wounds. He didn’t dare address how much his best friend looked like she’d seen a ghost, pale face and wide eyes and not just from blood loss.

“Cmon, we have to get out here.” He hooked his arms under hers and tried to get her to stand, but Natasha was far too spaced out too even notice what he was trying to do. But Clint’s main concern was the knife. He couldn’t pull it out lest she bled out before they made the jet, but Natasha couldn’t exactly walk far either.

He propped her up against the wall and lightly tapped her face a few times, her green eyes shooting back to his.

“Where did she go?” She asked, suddenly breathless.

“I really don’t know. But you need to get to medical, Nat. We have to let her go.”

“I knew her. Oh my god, I knew her, Clint. Why is she here?” Clint didn’t know how to answer. Part of him thought she was just rambling nonsense from the bloodloss, but a small part of him knew she was making sense. And it didn’t take a genius to figure out where they knew each other from.

“We’ll figure it out when we’re back.” His eyes widened as Natasha’s hand gravitated to the knife lodged in her calf. He reached for her hands, holding them up and away from her injury.

“Clint,” she warned, trying to pull her hands away. “Let me pull it out and we can go after her.”

Clint had to stop himself from rolling his eyes. Natasha’s stubbornness was infuriating sometimes. “That’s not gonna happen. She’s gone, Nat, and you need medical attention. Fury wouldn’t be impressed if you bled out from a knife wound.”

Natasha glared at him but stopped struggling and allowed him to help her limp back to the jet. They’d parked on the rooftop of an abandoned warehouse, so the stairs were a killer. Natasha’s lip bled from how hard she was biting it to muffle her cries of pain.

But the moment she sank down into her seat, memories flooded her mind, both positive and negative, but all involving Y/n. She wasn’t fifteen years old anymore with eyes full of hope, but the same spark was still there, one Natasha had fallen in love with.

What had happened to her?

~~~

The low clunk of a heavy metal door echoed through the chamber, three pairs of footsteps following suit. A female assassin, flanked by two guards, made her way to the centre of the room, her mask resting loosely between her fingers as her eyes remained fixed on the cracks in the concrete floor. The lighting was harsh, yellow bulbs buzzing, making her eye twitch.

Hushed voices became silent as she was presented before them and Y/n knew what was about to happen. She’d lived this day a thousand times.

“Agent,” one of the men called out, his voice gruff. “Mission report.”

“There was an ambush. I could not complete the mission, Sir.” Her eyes remained at her feet but she felt the air in the room shift and the guards beside her tense up. No one failed a mission in Hydra.

A pair of boots approached her and stopped only inches away. A calloused hand firmly gripped her chin and tilted her head up to the light, fingers bruising the skin on her jaw. “We taught you not to fail,” he spat, jerking his hand to emphasise his words. Y/n didn’t flinch. “All of your training, everything we’ve done for you and this is how you repay us?”

“There was a complication.”

He jerked her jaw again, forcing her to look him in the eye. “What complication?”

“The Avengers were there. I couldn’t-”

The sound of a fist slamming on a metal table made her jump and her mask clattered to the ground. The Avengers were a sore spot, and judging by the amount of Russian curse words intermingled with the Avengers’ name in only a few sentences, that hadn’t changed in the three days she’d been gone.

The agent in front of her returned to the group and Y/n finally took a breath, readjusting her jaw after its rough treatment. Although she worked willingly for Hydra, Y/n wasn’t that bothered with keeping track of exactly who they hated each week. She just did as she was told and breathed through the punishments that followed after. Work was work, unfortunately for her, and Hydra provided food and a roof over her head. Luxuries, as far as she was concerned.

A door opened to her right and she watched from the corner of her eye as a figure slipped through, sticking to the shadowed walls on instinct. The glint of a metal arm gave her a weird sense of peace and she turned to meet his eyes, his gaze softening as he looked at her.

“Soldat,” Pierce called, finally rising from his chair after staying silent for so long. He smiled slyly at Y/n who only ignored him. “Take our prized possession to the training room and make sure she never fails again. Use whatever measures you have to.” He directed his orders at Bucky who clenched his metal fist and grabbed Y/n/s forearm, dragging her out of the room.

Neither spoke a word until they reached the training room, just as dark and cold as the rest of the facility. You’d think an organisation like Hydra would have the funds to buy some decent light bulbs. All this yellow light was on Y/n’s last nerve.

Bucky threw her down onto the mats and stood with his arms behind his back as he watched the woman try to get her breath back. He didn’t intend to wind her, but the cameras in every corner were monitored so he couldn’t go easy on her.

“Sorry,” he muttered, his hair swinging beside his face and hiding his lips from view. Y/n waved him off and climbed to her feet, bringing her fists up to her face and setting her feet in a fighting stance. The cameras had no audio, so as long as they fought and he got a good few punches in, no one would suspect anything different.

“Don’t. Just hit me.” They circled each a few times, blocking a couple of punches but nothing major until Bucky grabbed Y/n’s arm and trapped her in a headlock, squeezing just tight enough that her airways were constricted. She tapped out and regained her position before they fought again, this time with her sending a few hits to his stomach.

“I need to ask you about something,” Y/n said through gritted teeth, deflecting a series of punches. Bucky grunted, which was his way of saying ‘go ahead’. “You know when you saw Steve for the first time since… you know, how did you handle it?”

Something shifted behind his eyes at the mention of his old best friend and he sent a strong left hook towards Y/n’s jaw, metal colliding with the bone with a crack. Her head whipped to the side and she let out a cry of pain, palm coming up to cradle her cheek. Bucky just watched for a moment before pulling her in front of him and forcing her to fight. They both hated this, but Y/n’s punishment would be ten times worse if he didn’t get enough good hits in. And Y/n preferred to be bruised by him than some old guard with unbridled rage and unchecked anger issues. Not a good mix.

“Was that not the right thing to ask?” How she could joke with a cracked cheekbone and bruised ribs was beyond Bucky, but humour seemed to be her preferred coping mechanism so he let her at it.

“It’s fine.” His words were more of a grumble than anything, but Y/n was used to that. He wanted to help, but you had to read deep between the lines. “I smashed several helicopters and almost killed him.” Wasn’t quite the response Y/n was expecting, or needed, really. “But they did brainwash me so I don’t suppose that helps.”

“Well, kind of?” Bucky narrowed his eyes and ducked, avoiding a punch before sending a kick to the back of Y/n’s knees. She wobbled but stayed upright, kicking him in the ribs to buy herself a couple of seconds of breathing time.

“Why do you ask? Did you see him?” It wasn’t hope that interjected his words, but Y/n noticed a flicker of something she couldn’t place a finger on.

“No, but I saw someone who reminded me of the same thing. Someone I thought I’d lost.” Natasha’s eyes, full of recognition and aspiration filled her mind and for a moment she faltered, lost in the dizzying memory, encapsulated by a flaming halo of hair. The scar in her eyebrow, her full lips, the ash that had settled on her black tactical suit; all flooding back and hitting Y/n like a truck.

She barely realised she was on the ground until she felt Bucky pin her arms above her head. She just stared into his eyes, a crease between her brows, unable to shake Natasha from her mind. Bucky watched her for a second before slapping her across the face.

“I’m sorry. Again.” He helped her to her feet. “But if they find out you know someone on the other side, they’ll do it to you too.” She’d watched many of his brainwashing sessions and even supervised when he’d come out of cryofreeze and none of it looked the slightest bit appealing. “I don’t want that for you.” She was the only good thing about this place and for his own sanity, he couldn’t lose her too.

“They couldn’t do that to me,” she said with a cocky smirk, her eyebrows quirking upwards. “I’m too valuable. Besides, Natalia won’t forget me again and would probably go on a killing spree if that happened.” Bucky shot her a look. “You’re right. That’s more my style.”

Bucky rolled his eyes slightly, unable to smile at her words. He was supposed to be an emotionless killer - they couldn’t know he had a soft spot for her.

“Luckily for you, you won’t see her again,” he said, swiping her legs from underneath her and sending her crashing to the floor. She scowled and scrambled up, jumping to wrap her thighs around his head in an attempt to bring him down. “It’s better that way.”

“Who says I won’t?” Y/n used her momentum to swing herself around, feeling his hands grip her thighs. “I want- I have to see her again. So I will.”

Successfully flooring him with an ‘a-ha’, Y/n straddled his waist and held her forearm to his throat. But she didn’t expect him to suddenly flip them both and mirror her actions, pushing her down into the thin mats and letting the cold seep through her suit as he held her there.

“So what, you’re going to kidnap her?”

Unbothered by her compromised position, Y/n just smirked, relaxing her body as she accepted defeat. “Who said anything about kidnapping?”

~~~

“Natasha, it’s a trap.” Clint was trying to talk some sense into his best friend, who was clearly having none of it.

“You think I don’t know that?” She gave him a look and returned to fixing her belt. “I’m prepared for this, so please stop stressing.”

“Oh, well forgive me for being sceptical seeing as the last time you encountered her she threw a knife into your knee,” Clint remarked with his arms folded over his chest. Natasha just rolled her eyes and stood up, adjusting her collar.

“I’m going to be ok,” she reassured, although her words fell on deaf ears. “I know who I’m dealing with.”

Clint looked into her eyes for a moment, trying to find a hint of doubt behind her bright green irises. But he found nothing but confidence, as usual. “But, do you?”

Whether it was part of her plan, no one knew, but Natasha walked straight into the trap with her head held high. It was easy, too easy. Natasha knew it, Y/n knew it. Yet that changed nothing. The blindfold was tugged from her eyes and she blinked, trying to adjust the dim light above her. The bulb only cast a small pool of light that spread not far from her chair, plunging the rest of the room into an eerie darkness. There was no sound, no gunfire or wind howling, and no windows as far as she could see. But her assessment of her surroundings was cut short when a figure stepped into view.

A small woman, slim, but muscular and toned enough to make it known that she could take down anyone of any size. Her posture was impeccable and she balanced a small blade between her fingers as if it were a feather and not a deadly weapon. Her lips curled into a smile, but it wasn’t all that inviting or warm. The yellowy light cast shadows across her face as she observed her hostage for a few seconds.

“I thought interrogations were supposed to be your thing, Natalia.” The way her old name dripped off her tongue was like sweet honey and Natasha clenched her jaw, eyes fixed on the woman prowling in front of her. Sure, she could get out of the ties around her wrists, but something kept her there. A desire to learn more about her. “You gave up pretty easily.”

“You know damn well I didn’t give up,” she spat, glaring up at the woman who was now standing so close their legs brushed. “I came willingly.”

“Oh I know,” the woman said with a smile, tracing the sharpness of the redhead’s jaw with her knife. “You can’t resist me.” Her Russian accent was thick and had Natasha completely transfixed. The tip of the knife trailed down to her collarbones so gently. “I didn’t think it would take years though.”

“I knew where you were.” Not exactly a lie - she’d been tracking Y/n’s work for years. She just didn’t know it was Y/n behind the killing sprees and assassinations.

“You break my heart.” There was a mischievous sparkle behind her eyes and it frustrated Natasha to no end. “Guess you thought you were too good for me now, huh? All caught up in your Avengers business and no time left for me.” She pouted like a child.

Natasha looked up at the dim light above her head before answering. It was cliche really, tied to a chair in the middle of a damp room with only a single string bulb as a light source. But the woman before her was far more calculated than she ever let on, so Natasha knew it was part of some much bigger plan.

“Well I can’t exactly have a coffee with the enemy,” she said sarcastically. “The Avengers would take you in if you stopped murdering people for no reason.”

“Ha!” She spat out, turning back around to face Natasha, her knife spinning casually between her fingers. “Avengers. What a pathetic excuse for an organisation. You think they mean well, and that’s just adorable really.”

“They’re not pathetic.” If there was one thing Natasha was protective about, it was her family. “Take a look at who you work for, you’ll find some pretty pathetic business going on there.”

Y/n’s eyes darkened. “Hydra is not stupid. At least our scientists actually do something useful instead of pottering about building metal suits.” A jab at Tony Stark. Classy.

“Yeah sure, if you call illegal human experimentation ‘useful’.”

Y/n let out a soft laugh. “Don’t get all big and bossy with me,” she replied, watching as Natasha’s stony expression cracked slightly. “The twins signed themselves up, I did nothing.”

“You lured them in.”

“What can I say, I’m irresistible.” She winked at Natasha and disappeared into the shadows, leaving a very disgruntled redhead alone.

To say she was the most annoying person Natasha had ever met was a severe understatement. That woman got under her skin and just festered there, and no amount of focus would ever make her go away.

Whether she was knocked out or drugged, Natasha didn’t know, but when she next woke the room was a lot brighter and her hands were no longer tied behind her back. Y/n sat opposite her, the same blade laying flat in her palm.

“Took you long enough.” This wasn’t the same place as before and Natasha reached for her belt, wanting to feel protected. “Don’t. I’m not going to hurt you.”

“That’s reassuring, considering you kidnapped me.”

Y/n finally looked up and scoffed, pushing her chair back so it scraped harshly across the wooden floorboards. “I did not kidnap you. We went over this Natalia. You came willingly.”

“And then you tied me up.” Natasha gestured to her wrists, now free of course.

“What can I say, I’m into that kind of thing.”

Natasha sighed. This was her chance. She wasn’t restrained, Y/n seemed relaxed and no one else was around. She could save a lot of lives, and her own ass by killing Y/n now. But somehow she couldn’t shake the memory of all the stolen kisses and touches they’d shared within the icy confines of the Red Room. How that young girl had been through so much and yet still felt so familiar sitting in the chair opposite.

“Y/n,” she started, switching her approach completely. “What happened to you?” The woman looked up, eyes dark, scanning across every inch of the redhead’s face.

“Why would you care anyway?” Her witty sarcasm was gone, replaced by a steel wall behind her eyes that fully blocked Natasha out. The redhead plagued her mind and tugged at the knot in her stomach, but she refused to let it win.

“You were there, and then you left. And I never knew why.”

“No. I didn’t leave. You did, Natalia.” Her tone was accusatory as she leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. “You left me alone in that place and you let them take me.”

“I didn’t leave you. They told me you got out, escaped, so I asked to go on more missions. I couldn’t bear it there without you.” Natasha’s voice dropped on the last few words, almost scared to admit her feelings out loud. How could she? The woman she swore to love for the rest of her life had broken her heart to the point where she had never loved anyone since.

“And you believed what they told you?” Natasha said nothing. “Somehow you manage to escape and you don’t come looking for me. We had a promise, Natalia. No matter what, we’d find each other. What happened to that?” Y/n was no longer a deadly Hydra agent gripping the handle of her knife like she was ready to send it flying into a target. No. She was a little girl again, holding onto promises as the last sign of hope in her life. Holding onto Natasha’s pinky finger with her own like their lives depended on it.

Noticing that Natasha didn’t want to break the silence, she continued. “Do you know how hard it is to find work with our skill set? For the ‘good guys’, I mean. You got lucky.” There was a hint of resentment in her words and it hit Natasha in the stomach. “When you tell people you’re an assassin for hire, they usually want to throw you into a penitentiary or shoot you dead right there and then. I had no choice.”

“If you knew where I was, then why didn’t you come and find me?”

Y/n hesitated for a moment. “You didn’t need me ruining what you’ve already got here.” This amount of vulnerability made Y/n’s skin crawl, but all her usual standards seemed to fly out of the window when Natasha was around. It had done ever since they were barely teenagers, soft lips pressed against each other in the gentlest of kisses. The fear of getting caught was worthless when compared to the comfort they had found within each other. “Besides, if I went after an Avenger, we’d both be dead.”

“They gave me a second chance, they would give you one too. You just have to prove it.” Natasha rose from her seat and joined the other woman who had moved to look out of the water-damaged window. “I can see how much you hate it, Y/n.”

“Hate what?”

“Working for Hydra. I can see it.”

Her grip tightened around her knife and Natasha took a step back. “No, they gave me everything.” But her words weren’t as convincing as she intended them to be, her lack of will to live and keep fighting catching up with her. “I owe them everything.”

“But Shield can give you more. You deserve to have something good.” Natasha squared her shoulders and reached out to place a hand on the woman’s shoulder. “No more pain, no more manipulation. You get to call the shots, make your own decisions.” Y/n wasn’t convinced. “We’d get a second chance too.” Her nose scrunched slightly, unable to gauge how Y/n would respond to her last words.

Y/n looked down at her hands, avoiding Natasha’s gaze and trying not to focus on how comforting her touch felt. She stared at the blood that had dried under her fingernails. It never seemed to fade, no matter how hard she scrubbed. She wanted so desperately to run, leave her problems behind like she’d always done. But part of her clung onto the prospect of a second chance with Natalia - she’d craved her warmth for over a decade.

Natasha saw the conflict flicker behind the woman’s eyes, a stark contrast to the sarcastic and confident front she’d put on only hours before. She was exhausted, anyone could see that and Natasha knew all too well what it was like to want to stop running. To stop fighting for other people and start fighting for yourself.

“Why are you doing this? I thought you came here to kill me?” Y/n’s eyes turned icy and she pulled her body away from Natasha, distancing herself once again. But the emotion in her voice couldn’t be masked, and it made Natasha’s expression soften.

“I made a different call.”

Y/n bit her lip, the knife between her fingers spinning rapidly but controlled. “I don’t deserve this second chance, Natalia. Just do what you came to do, earn yourself some more brownie points for the boss.” Her jaw clenched and Natasha pulled her gun from the holster. But instead of firing it, she simply slid it along the dusty floorboards, along with her belt full of weapons. Y/n scoffed at her actions, holding her knife as firmly as she could, but the tremble in her fingers gave her away. She didn’t mean this. Any of it.

“Well that was stupid.”

But her movements were suddenly halted. The door to Natasha’s left crashed down and three figures burst in, firing shots at Y/n before Natasha had a chance to protest. They’d seen the knife and reacted, ignoring the way Natasha yelled at them. The women threw themselves down onto the ground, Natasha shielding Y/n’s body with her own.

“Stand down!” She yelled, holding Y/n against the floor whilst turning over her shoulder. Steve, Clint and Sam stood in the doorway, weapons aimed and pointing at the assassins on the floor. “I didn’t signal anything!”

“You’d been gone for hours Nat, we had no choice. Fury gave the order.” Natasha ignored Clint’s words as Y/n groaned beneath her. Their weapons were still aimed at the Hydra agent despite Natasha’s glare.

The redhead slowly removed her hands and went to help Y/n sit up, but then she noticed the blood. It was visible even through her dark suit and Y/n gingerly pressed her hand to her stomach before pulling it away with a frown.

“I don’t know if we’ll get that second chance, Natalia,” she whispered, looking up at terrified green eyes. “You’ll have to do it on your own.”

“No, don’t say that.” Natasha replaced Y/n’s hands and began to press down on the wound, muttering her apologies as Y/n whined in pain. “You’re going to be ok.”

‘I want to be good, Natalia. I really wanted to be good.” Her words were strained as blood continued to pour from her wounds, coating Natasha’s hands instantly.

“I know, Y/n, I know. You will be, just stay with me please.” She pressed down harder, tears blurring her vision as she felt blood pooling beneath her palms. No one was listening to her cries for help- why weren’t they listening?

Y/n weakly grabbed Natasha’s wrist and pulled her hands off her wound, shaking her head at Natasha’s protests. She could taste metal on her tongue and the redhead’s face faded in and out of focus as she tried to shakily cup her cheek.

“Natalia-”

“No!” Natasha’s lip trembled and she shook her head frantically, pulling her hand away from Y/n/s grip. “You’re not leaving me now, I swear to god. You can be good, I know you can.” Y/n smiled weakly, barely conscious now as blood trickled from her lips. “Please, I just got you back! I can’t lose you again.”

“You won’t lose me, I’ll always be here.” Her nose scrunched up at how cheesy it sounded as she reached her hand up to point to Natasha’s chest. “Right here.”

“No, no, no. Don’t talk like that! You’re not giving up on me, Y/n. Pain only makes you stronger, come on!” She was just spewing words now, her sentences all jumbled and barely making sense as she pressed down on the wound. Y/n smiled up at her and tried to squeeze her thigh where her hand rested. But the energy in her body was fading fast and she could do nothing but look Natasha in the eyes in her final moments, wanting to memorise that specific colour one last time.

When her hand slipped to the floor with a thud, Natasha’s heart stopped. An eerie silence fell across the room, the feeling of death weighted like a blanket. The redhead didn’t make a sound, her sobs silent despite the tears trickling down her flushed cheeks. A stark contrast to her pale skin.

“No,” she shakily whispered, pushing Y/n’s hair back out of her face with a bloodied hand. “I’m sorry.” She cupped her bruised cheek and brushed her thumb over it, finally feeling her skin under her hand for the first time in years. It wasn’t as soft as she remembered, years worth of scars destroying the surface, but it was still perfect to her all the same.

Tears mixed with the blood and created a watery mixture that dripped down off Y/n’s chin and into the collar of her suit. Natasha dropped her head to rest on the other woman’s chest, hands moving to grip her shoulders tightly as though she might disappear. The redhead kept muttering apologies, wanting to make up for all the time they’d lost, even if it was fruitless.

The three men in the doorway shifted uncomfortably, the scene before them an unexpected one. “Natasha-“ Clint began, taking a step towards the redhead.

“What did you do?” Her voice was dangerously low and she slowly turned around, Y/n’s hand now clasped in hers. “Look what you did!”

Sam and Steve hung their heads, not wanting to see anymore of the dead woman across the room. Clint was just focused on his distraught best friend, who’s hands now matched the colour of her hair.

“Nat, we need to go-“

“Then go,” she spat. “I’m not leaving her.”

Clint let out a sigh and slung his bow over his shoulder. He gestured to Steve to help, who looked rather uncomfortable but followed anyway. “Well bring her with us-“

“What, so you can parade her in front of Fury and show off? Yes, well done, target eliminated! You don’t touch her!” Natasha was clawing and kicking as Steve pulled her to her feet. She held onto Y/n’s hand for as long as possible before Clint gently tugged it free, triggering an outburst from Natasha.

She was a mess of limbs, uncharacteristically uncoordinated as she struggled against Steve’s body as he guided her out of the room, practically carrying her as she refused to walk. The whole time she screamed out for Y/n, her voice growing more hoarse by the second. She took no interest in her surroundings, the dimly lit stairwell not even registering in her mind. All her spy training had completely vanished.

She was placed onto one of the benches in the jet and she watched, a shaking mess, as Clint placed Y/n’s limp body on the floor opposite, blood no longer pouring from her stomach. Natasha stayed frozen in her seat, knees pulled up to her chest as a defence mechanism. She didn’t care that there was blood on her hands, nor that it transferred onto her cheek when she wiped her nose. No, she didn’t care about anything except the woman lying in front of her.

The lifeless woman.

She wanted to scream but it was as if all the emotions had drained out of her body like a flood. She was numb, just staring with empty eyes, the light behind them barely flickering now. Clint shot worried glances in her direction once the jet was in the sky, and Steve and Sam stayed well away, not wanting to fall under the wrath of an extremely angry and emotional Natasha.

Not that she cared what the others did. She just wanted the one thing she couldn’t have. Fate had shown her time and time again that it was not on her side, but this truly was her final straw. There was no fixing this.

They had found and lost each other within the space of a months. But this time there were no second chances. It was set in stone, just like Y/n’s name would be for the rest of time.

Maybe, in another lifetime, they would finally meet again.

Maybe, in another universe, Natasha Romanoff could truly be happy.

#natasha romanoff #marvel #fanfic #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff x female reader #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff angst #wlw #lovers to enemies #marvel angst #black widow

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hadesforpreswrites · 3 months

Text

dirty laundry, pt. 5

a/n: here's part 5! finally! i think i'm going to make this the final in this series. i have a couple side stories for them i want to write though! as always, i hope you enjoy and please: like and reblog! comments are also nice (more than nice, they make me so happy).

pairing: noah sebastian x reader

genre: idiots-to-lovers

warnings: oral (fem receiving), fingering, unprotected (oops) sexual intercourse, they're so cute

word count: 2,756

summary: let's end this birthday with a bang

part one part two part three part four

it took them all of ten minutes to reach the bowling alley. and they were met with various looks from their friends when they pull into the parking lot. scarlett was smirking but trying to hide it with a painted on scowl. the others were blatantly smirking at noah.

y/n’s face lit up when she saw two more of their friends joining them. without waiting for noah to open her door, knowing that it would likely earn her a lecture later, and rushed toward juliet with arms open wide.

“i’m so sorry we couldn’t make it to dinner!” juliet apologized as she squeezed the other woman.

“couldn’t miss bowling though!” andy said, wrapping his arms around the two.

“that’s okay! i’m glad you’re here!” she said.

noah walked toward their group of friends with a smile on his face and threw his arm around y/n’s shoulders when she stepped back from andy and juliet.

“what took you so long?” andy asked noah as the group made their way into the building.

“dessert,” was all he said, earning him a smack from y/n, as they walked up to the counter and he got their shoes and two games paid for. since there were so many of them, they needed a couple of lanes but that’s how it was every year.

noah was pretty good at the game but y/n was not. after her fourth-in-a-row gutter ball, she walked back laughing and said, “i said it was fun not that i was good at it.”

“well, can’t be good at everything,” noah said, kissing her forehead as she sat next to him.

“there’s plenty i’m not good at,” she shot back with a smile on her face.

“name one. that’s not bowling.”

“mini golf. never played regular golf but i’m sure i’d suck at it too. and bonus answer: chemistry. i’m very bad at chemistry.”

“fair enough,” he said, standing up to bowl his turn. he earned a strike, causing everyone at their lane to groan as he strutted back to the seat.

“next time we play teams,” nick said. “y/n can level him out.”

“rude,” she said, laughing.

the games continued on for a couple of hours before y/n started walking back shaking her wrist.

“you okay?” noah asked, worried.

“yeah. wrist is starting to give out on me though. we’re almost done, i can make it.”

“if you’re sure.”

the last to bowl was jolly, who earned himself a strike and ended the game in second place. noah was in first. y/n, tragically, in last.

“that’s fine,” she said. “i’ll kick his ass in mario kart though.”

“you’ll kick my ass?” noah confirmed with a smirk.

“damn straight.”

“you’re on, doll.”

the group walked to the arcade side of the building after dropping their shoes off at the counter. y/n chose yoshi and noah chose his driver and off they went on rainbow road.

“oh shit, i think she’s got you,” nicholas said, laughing.

“you’re supposed to be on my team,” noah said through gritted teeth as he took a shell.

“just stating facts, man.”

scarlett and juliet cheered as y/n passed the finish line in first place.

“told you,” she said smugly to noah next to her, who took second.

“yeah, yeah,” he said, smiling at her.

“okay, someone win me a stuffie from that machine,” scarlett announced, moving the group along.

“those things are rigged, scar. it’s a futile mission,” y/n called after her, standing up from the mario kart game, pulling noah with her.

he watched as she took in their surroundings, trying to decide what to do next. he saw her demeanor drop ever so slightly before she turned to him.

“you okay, doll?”

“social battery’s low,” she mumbled.

“do you wanna head to the hotel?”

she nodded.

“okay, we can do that. let’s go let them know,” he held out his hand for her to latch on to before pulling her toward one of the groups of their friends, gathered by a claw machine in an attempt to win scarlett a stuffed avocado.

still holding his hand, y/n embraced scarlett and mumbled something in her ear, earning her a kiss on the forehead and a nudge. they made their rounds saying goodbye to everyone, most would follow suit shortly after the couple departed anyway.

once out at the car, noah held the passenger door open and allowed her to get comfortable in the seat before he settled himself behind the wheel. he pulled out of the parking lot and onto the street before placing his hand on y/n’s thigh, squeezing it in reassurance. she traced the tattoos that adorned the skin as the two of them rode in a comfortable silence toward the hotel he had booked.

once they were there, he grabbed their bags from the backseat before opening the passenger door for her to exit. he carried both bags in one hand and threw the other around her shoulders and pulled her tight to him as they walked into the lobby. it was calm and quaint when they entered the building, greeted sweetly by a kind concierge person behind the counter.

noah greeted them back and explained that he had booked a room a couple days previous and gave his information to the person.

once he had the key cards in hand, he steered them both toward the elevators and pushed the up button. when they reached their floor, they walked down the hall toward their room. after he unlocked the door, he motioned for her to enter in front of him. he shut and locked the door with both locks after placing the “do not disturb” placard on the door knob.

he sat their bags down on the bed as he watched y/n quietly take it all in. she stopped by the windows and looked out at the horizon and all the lights of the city below them. he took out his phone and snapped a picture of her in the low light of the room. he smiled to himself as he threw his phone on the bed and walked up behind her and wrapped his arms around her middle.

“what are you thinking about?” he asked, pressing a kiss to her shoulder.

“just everything.”

“you do that a lot.”

“it’s a personality fault.”

“nah,” he said. “i don’t think it’s a fault to think about everything. i think it’s a strength.”

“you would say that,” she smiled as she turned to face him, back against the glass of the window.

“i mean think about it. you see different perspectives and are able to choose one that makes the most sense to you after you examine those differences. that’s pretty neat.”

“you’re pretty neat.”

“y/n, are you flirting with me?”

“i mean, you’re pretty hot when you get all philosophical. it’s hard not to. especially when you’re all dressed up.”

“oh, she’s bold tonight.”

“she is,” she wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in for a kiss.

he wrapped his arms around her frame and held her tight as his lips moved with hers. he let his hands wander down her back before they found themselves gripping her ass, a silent plea for more.

continuing her bold streak, y/n pushed him with her body to move them toward the bed. when his knees hit the bed, he sat, pulling her with him. her hands cupped his cheeks as she straddled him. his hands were still gripping her wherever he could.

her hands began to wander down to the buttons on his black dress shirt. slowly, she started to unbutton the garment.

“you know, if you want me naked, you just have to ask,” he joked as he pulled back from her for air.

“noah,” she started.

“yes, doll?” he answered with a smirk.

“please help me take this shirt off of you.”

“anything for the birthday girl,” he said as he finished unbuttoning the shirt and pulled it off his shoulders.

“anything?” she asked, her boldness starting to wear off.

his eyebrows raised.”what’d you have in mind?”

a blush crept up her neck and landed on her cheeks as she mumbled something he couldn’t make out.

“what was that?”

“nevermind, let’s just watch a movie or something,” she said quickly, trying to cover up her embarrassment as she moved to get off his lap.

his hands gripped her hips tightly. “oh, no you don’t. what is it you want, baby?”

“you,” she said, quietly.

“you have me,” he said, not quite understanding.

she huffed in frustration, mostly at herself. “i want you,” she repeated.

“doll, baby, you have me. always.”

unable to get herself to speak the words outright, she opted to roll her hips against him. the movement caused him to throw his head back and moan.

“we really gotta work on your ability to say what you want, baby.”

she rolled her eyes. he chuckled darkly and turned to throw her on the bed on her back. he kicked off his shoes and threw hers off as well before settling between her legs on his stomach.

“c’mon, say it.”

she shook her head.

“baby, please,” he pleaded.

“i can’t,” she whispered.

“why not?”

“i don’t know.”

“you’re adorable,” he said, causing her to groan.

“i’m not trying to be cute, noah.”

“i know that, doll. but i can’t give you something if i don’t know what it is.”

“i think you do know and you’re torturing me.”

“i would never,” he propped his head on his hands that were folded on her stomach. she ran her fingers through his hair, causing his eyes to close at the contact.

“i want you to make love to me, noah.” his eyes shot open. “make me forget, if even for a moment, about that one experience.”

“i’m only going to if you’re truly ready, doll.”

“i am. i’ve been thinking about it for a while.”

“are you sure it’s not my birthday?”

“at this rate it will be.”

“she got jokes,” he said as kissed down her clothed stomach. he pushed the hem of her dress up her thighs, exposing her. he licked his lips before pressing a kiss to her covered center, causing her to let out a sigh.

for the second time that night, noah pulled her underwear down her legs and hooked one over his shoulder, spreading her. greedily, he ran his tongue up her slit. when he reached her clit, he pulled it into his mouth with a suck. he continued to lick her until he started to pull loud moans from her. her fingers were pulling at his hair as her breathing came out in bursts.

“noah,” she sighed as his tongue worked her through the second climax of the night.

he placed a kiss to her inner thigh before putting her leg back down and sliding up her body to her face. her eyes were closed as she came down. he held himself up on an elbow and stroked her hair as he kissed her face.

he tugged at the hem of her shirt causing her to sit up so it could be taken off and discarded with his on the floor. he skillfully unhooked her bra and tossed it aside before lowering her back to the bed. his lips found hers quickly and he moaned into her mouth as he felt her hands slide down his bare torso to his belted pants. she made quick work of the buckle and had one of her hands on his member just as quickly. he didn’t let her touch him for long before he pulled her hand away from him, causing her to let out a whine.

“so impatient,” he tsked as he stood up from the bed to pull his pants and underwear down in one fluid motion. he stood with his hands on his hips, cock standing at attention, and looked down at her. her breathing was starting to even out as he watched her. “there’s just one thing that needs to change about this moment, doll,” he pointed to her skirt that was still on.

she lifted her hips and began to pull the fabric off of her form and kicked it off the bed.

“perfect,” he breathed.

“noah,” she held her arms out to him.

he knelt on the bed and crawled over her. he pushed his lips to hers again as he let his hand travel down her body and to the apex of her thighs. he gathered the slick that had accumulated and used it to push one of his fingers inside her. after a couple of moments, he pushed a second finger inside her and let her adjust before scissoring them and using his thumb to rub figure eights on her clit.

“noah,” she breathed out after he released her lips.

“think you can give me another one before i give you my cock, doll?” he said between breaths in her ear.

“yes,” she moaned.

“good girl,” he said, feeling her clench around his fingers. he hooked his fingers in her, hitting that spot deep inside her causing her to cry out. “fuck,” he moaned. “can’t wait to feel you wrapped around me. see what noises you make then.”

she was pushed over the edge at his words and came with a loud moan. she whined as he pulled his fingers out of her, missing the feeling. “don’t worry, you’ll feel even more full in a moment, baby.”

“noah, please.”

“so polite,” he muttered as he lined himself up with her.

he slowly began entering her in order to let her get used to his size little by little. once he was fully wrapped up by her he leaned down and kissed her forehead, then her shut eyes, then her lips. her arms came from beside her and wrapped around his neck, locking him in place as she began to move her hips under him. he took the hint quickly and began to pull his hips back and pushed them back in slowly.

“noah,” she breathed out again. “noah, please.”

“please, what, baby?”

“faster.”

he kissed her on the forehead again before sitting back and giving himself more leverage as he pumped in and out of her quicker than before.

“oh my god,” they moaned at the same time.

“you feel better than i could have ever imagined,” he said through gritted teeth as he watched himself move in and out of her.

she moaned his name again as she came the fourth time that night. he followed right after feeling her clench around him. he pulled out and laid next to her, both of them catching their breath as they looked in each other’s eyes. he turned on his side, facing her, “i love you, y/n,” he said as he brushed her hair behind her ear.

“i love you. so much,” she answered.

he pulled her lips to his for a sweet kiss, placing their foreheads together after pulling away.

after a few minutes laying there, he rolled out of bed and walked to the adjoining bathroom, he wet a washcloth with warm water and walked back out to wipe the mess that they had made together from the inside of her thighs. when he finished, he pulled her up, much to her protest and pointed her to the bathroom. he smacked her ass lightly to get her moving, earning him a playful glare.

he laid back on the bed, arms folded behind his head. when she emerged from the bathroom she scoured the floor for her underwear.

“doll, you could just sleep naked,” he laughed as she continued to look in the dark for them.

“it would make me more comfortable to not,” she said, practically jumping in them once she found them.

after donning the lace garment, she climbed in bed and put her head on his chest with one arm thrown over his middle.

“so,” she started, causing him to laugh.

“so, indeed.”

“condoms from here on out. i can’t believe i let you do that,” she said, burying her face in his chest.

“honestly, me either. and i’m sorry, i wasn’t even thinking.”

“me either! so no need to say sorry.”

“wait, does this mean there will be a future time?” he joked, causing her to roll her eyes.

“maybe,” she said, he feigned hurt.

they fell asleep shortly after, holding each other.

#noah sebastian #bad omens fic #noah sebastian fic #noah sebastian x reader #bad omens #bad omens fanfic #noah sebastian smut #bad omens smut #noah sebastian fanfic #bad omens cult

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callmeklair · 20 days

Text

declaration

[A/N: I know this chapter is short, only around 2k words, but I promise next one will be longer and updated as soon as possible as my schedule is almost stabilized now]

Chapter seven

“I’d rather not know.”

“so this is where you guys are. such a drag.”

Yui has never been happier in her life until now to see Shu. what a right timing!

“Shu-san!” yes she was very happy.

“drop it, you guys left me alone to deal with all that troublesome nonsense, I had to use my precious stored energy to wave them off. how are you gonna compensate for it?” Shu glared at them, but too lazy. He really had to go around the circles to dodge those noisy girls.

“well the girls targeted you, so as you said, just remove the root of the problem, we ran away.” Shin hmphed as he was feeling tired, maybe because he felt relaxed after a really long time.

“Let's go home Yui, I'm tired. We can buy the dress another day” Shu said as he had enough. It was a long day for him.

“hmm what is that?” Shin ignored Shu and asked Yui, as he pointed at a ice cream van having a poster of ‘new nuts & crunch scoop’

the word nuts always attracted him.

“oh… looks like a new flavour of ice cream containing nuts. it looks delicious” Yui answered.

“of course it will, after all it's nuts. I’ll go get it” Shin ran to the van before his favourite flavour got sold out.

Yui watched how his strawberry hair bounced as he happily ran away like a child.

‘Does a wolf eat cereal? That also nut flavoured?’ She peeked at the animal as her eyes softened when she noticed it’s fur color. At first it was dark so she didn’t notice but it’s pink at a near glance. Baby pink? No strawberry pink? No, it's ginger pink, just like Shin. What’s weird is that the wolf also has an eye-patch like him.

…

Over and over again she has been ignoring the signs.

Why are founders suddenly quiet? It's been a little while since their last attack.

‘I'd rather not know’

“Let’s go Shu-san” without waiting, she left.

– Yui's room, Sakamaki mansion:

This is so unfair… just when she was finally happy… or maybe she is just overthinking it. Maybe the founders are planning something big that’s why they suddenly went quiet.

Yui tremblingly hugged her wolf plushie resembling Shin to ward off all the negative thoughts and fall asleep in this mess.

She thought she’ll at least be at peace in her dreams, but no, she suddenly found herself in school infirmary with the same ringing noise like in those other dreams. But this time there was someone standing in front of her.

“No need- bother- it’ll be unnec-sary- to return ‘home’ -anymore”

“now- my pro-rty

“Don’t compa- to them- i’m a founde- **i* **u****mi”

the ringing noise was starting to become louder and the cut off sentences were beginning to disappear. Even the unknown man faded into thin air.

She was now totally surrounded by darkness, alone, with the ringing noise…. and an inaudible echo.

“Eve.. are y**- rem****ring?”

– Dungeon, Tsukinami mansion:

Waking up in the dungeon after a long time was not in Shin’s to-do-list after having a good time with Yui.

It was hazy and all he remembers is coming home to his angry brother and ending up in the dungeon.

“You are finally awake, Shin?”

Speak of the devil. The word Shin was highlighted coldly and he knew what it meant. Taking a deep breath, he slowly looked up.

“....”

Carla narrowed his eyes and put a hand over his forehead, sweeping the bangs, while looking at his younger brother.

“Over and over again you had enough opportunities to capture her and bring her here, yet you decided not to. Are you waiting for the eclipse to get over?”

Low angry voice. Shin isn't surprised.

“Nii-san I… I was trying to win her trust so that she won’t be a nuisance initially-”

“It's not needed. Her trust is not needed, she’ll be a nuisance anyways. We bring her here, cleanse her blood and continue our lineage.”

“5 days. I’m giving you 5 days to bring her here before I myself decide to interfere in this troublesome matter.”

Without giving Shin a chance to speak, Carla left the dungeon to let his brother continue his punishment.

5 days… the prom is also in 5 days, what a coincidence or not. His brother is smart enough to know that the prom party will be the perfect time to take her away. The vampires won’t be able to notice immediately among a bunch of students as their senses are weak.

It’s frustrating. Maybe he should have caught her on day one.

“Thank you Shin-kun for protecting me”

Shin still remembers how she thanked him for protecting her in the dispute with the abusive boy at the rooftop on day one. During the whole tour she was down and numb. Her words were void of emotions when explaining the school layout. It felt off, even though he shouldn’t have cared, it still bothered him. What hell has she been living in with those vampires?

How ironic… that’s what he and his brother were gonna do to her, they were going to put her through the same hell and just like he said previously he shouldn’t have cared about her well being. Their only goal was their lineage.

Empathy doesn’t exist in demons.

but…

“cause… I wanted to be alone with you.”

The way she blushed from those simple words. Her ears and cheeks red, just like a tomato. It was cute. Every single time they met and were alone, he started to see improvement in her complexion. At first he viewed that as a good point as it’ll be easy to conceive with that healthy body of hers but soon he forgot his own purpose. He just wanted to be with her. It has been so long since he felt genuinely alive.

But it was all going to end soon.

–Rooftop, Ryoutei Academy:

Unknowingly, the rooftop has become a safe spot for Yui. the cool breeze calmed her as she sat on the floor, hugging her knees and looking at the full red moon. Everybody has their own secret spot and for Yui, it’s the school rooftop. It might not be a secret like other’s spot but it’s her comfort.

This place holds her memories with Shin.

And right now she is too deep down in the hole she has dug herself. It was from day one. She had a chance, a chance to take Shu’s hand while she fell in the shallow pit, but instead she took the shovel called Shin and kept digging more like an idiot thinking another path will open which will be safer, unknowingly caging herself the deeper she went as the light slowly disappeared above her. And now, the reliable shovel is broken too.

There was… a cracking noise within her.

There’s gotta be a fix. Every problem always has a fix. Right?

“What are you doin’ here?”

Her ears perked up from the voice beside her and she saw Shin sitting beside her in the same way she is.

“J-just enjoying the view”

Silence befell between them. Unlike previously she didn’t strike up random conversation to waive the awkward air around them.

Shin glanced at her complexion from side eye and it looked paler.

“Why are you here?” without even looking at him, she asked. She was too exhausted.

He hesitated for a moment, his throat feeling dry, like he was scared.

“I came to ask if you want to… bunk the school to go out with me?”

“What?!” His words brought her back to her senses as she looked at him bewildered while he gave his signature smirk.

#diabolik lovers #dialovers #yui komori #komori yui #diabolik lovers fandom #shu sakamaki #diabolik lovers yui #shin tsukinami #diabolik lovers shin #diabolik lovers fanfic #diabolik lovers fanfiction #shin x yui #shinyui fanfic #shinyui #tsukinami shin #tsukinami carla #carla tsukinami #dl declaration

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junedenim · 4 days

Text

2007

beneath the boardwalk, part 5 (series masterlist)

my mistakes were made for you

warnings: angst, fluff, smut, robert, etc.

word count: 12.3k

I had my hair cut just above my shoulders but it was not a bob, I am adamant about this. I got a light fringe that I never wore full-frontal on my forehead. I was inclined to pull the two sections apart like a curtain or, regrettably, have them as side bangs.

After New Year's, I returned to London and left many things behind in Wakefield, most notably my journals. I was starting fresh and wanted to claim independence. Stacey gifted me a stack of Moleskine notebooks for Christmas that I wrote in and I began babysitting two girls (5 & 7) who lived in the building with their single mother, Lee, who was 6 years older than me. Georgia and I refused to turn on the heat because we weren't overflowing with cash, especially after my father and I agreed I would start paying rent after the three-month grace period he gave me.

The other reason was we felt more like struggling artists, piled under blankets, wearing two pairs of socks, and heating meals in the microwave because they had grown too cold too quickly. Georgia would write poetry in her room then meet me in the living room and recite it. I was without an editor since Alex and I's parting. So, I began to share my writing with Georgia. After we traded pieces, we would crack the window open and smoke cigarettes out of it.

I was aware I was using Georgia to refill the Alex-shaped hole in my life. What Georgia and I were doing was what I dreamt for Alex and me. I had overwhelming happiness for Alex but I felt disappointed (and certainly jealous) that we didn't experience the struggling artist phase together. But Georgia was what I needed: a friend.

Madeline Critchley, who helped me submit to Granta, got me a position with the University of Greenwich's literary magazine, Anthology. It felt dumb to start at the magazine a few months before I was finished with school but she told me it didn't matter how much time I put into it but what I got out of it. It was cheesy but it ended up being true. I wrote endlessly, trapped inside that building. I was overcome by some being and she never let me stop.

I was invited to a secret gig at The Leadmill in February. Arctic Monkeys's tour director emailed the invitation. I thought about going but used the excuse of babysitting and RSVPed no. Georgia, her new girlfriend, Kyle, Dianna, Robert, and I went and saw Amy Winehouse instead. Obviously, I don't regret the decision.

Not speaking of Alex seemed an unspoken rule but I couldn't help but think of him when Amy came on stage. Not because I related her songs to Alex and our relationship but because the bastard got to meet her and didn't fucking introduce me to her!

Robert's place was a close distance from Astoria so we all, except Dianna, went back and crashed at his place instead of taking a 40-minute ride home on the underground late at night. Georgia and Kyle would sleep on the pull-out and Robert would share his bed with me.

Before we went to sleep, Robert and I smoked a joint in his room. It didn't do much for me, only making me tired-eyed. Robert was in a constant state of haziness. He wore leather pants and a turtleneck. His hair was overgrown and every movement he made bounced his curls.

"Heard about you and Alex." It was the first time we had seen each other this semester. I had only told Georgia, she informed everyone else for me.

"Yep."

"Sorry 'bout that."

I shrugged. It wasn't something I wanted to talk about.

"Sucks we can't get free concert tickets now."

I huffed a laugh. "I didn't think you were much of a fan anyway."

"Well, you know, it's a good place to pick up girls." He eyed me. It was obvious.

"I didn't pay attention to that kind of thing."

"Oh, come on, like you weren't watching every girl there who could steal your man."

I shrugged again. I was never threatened by that idea or maybe I was just uncaring towards it.

"Your ambivalence is a man's greatest dream."

"He never did anything for me to not trust him."

"What about me?"

"Oh," I exaggeratedly rolled my eyes. "I'd never trust you."

We shared a laugh and the joint had reached its butt. He put it down. "So, shall we just get to fucking?"

I pushed off the wall and walked over to what had been deemed my side of the bed. "God, Robert."

"Come on. It's been a long time coming. We're here. We're single. It's our last year. We're never gonna be here again."

"You just want to get yours wet."

"So, you're wet? And hell yeah."

"Shut up."

"Let me kiss you."

"I'm going to bed."

"Fine. Me too."

We laid side-by-side for a minute before I kissed him and then we fucked. I don't remember much. I wasn't that drunk or high. It just wasn't very memorable.

Robert and I had a transactional relationship. Before we began hooking up this was the case and now that we were spending our nights together, we shared awful things with one another, none of which were words. Drugs seemed to be the biggest thing. A joint after sex was expected and by March, Robert and I were snorting coke with one another. It was quite enjoyable. For the time.

We ended up in Regent's Park one night. We sprawled across the vast grass. He called people—they weren't friends—on his Motorola Razr and switched between rambling with them and rambling at me. I brought my notebook and thought about writing but he was too loud.

I searched through my bag for something I never found and remembered when I came with Alex. I hated the infection of him but something about that night and picturing him on a bench next to me made me smile.

I thought of guards changing. My first trip down to London when I was 10 and how Stacey and I stood, faces squeezing through the gates of Buckingham Palace to watch the New Guard replace the Old Guard. I couldn't understand how anyone would want to stand outside on sentry duty for hours. The relief when the New Guard showed up must have been such an enormous relief as their bladders ached and their shoulders begged for mercy. I wondered about the relief Alex felt as the New Guard replaced him. Or did he wish to continue to stand still by the palace's side? But the Old Guard becomes the New Guard eventually. They all just go spinning around.

I wrote about the places we attribute to people. The corners of the world that just belong to them. (Alex, unbeknownst to me, had already done the same [505]). I left Alex's fingerprint out of the piece but it had him all smeared over it. I wrote about the Guard and Stacey's little head nearly trapped in between the metal bars. It was my favourite piece I wrote for Anthology.

I sent it to Alex. He responded:

Buckingham Palace still has guards???? Are people still trying to actively kill the Queen?

I responded:

Diana's ghost.

Alex never sent me any of his work. I dreamt of a book one day appearing on my car roof. But my car stayed in Wakefield and Alex stayed nowhere. It was a rotten daydream.

In April, days before Favourite Worst Nightmare was released, the band played the Astoria for two nights. I hadn't heard any material yet, besides the recently released single "Brianstorm" and its b-sides, I had heard none of the album. It was unsettling not to know the songs. To not have the entire setlist memorized, front to back.

My goal was always to be friends with Alex and going to the concert felt like solidifying this notion. Georgia found my need to befriend Alex so quickly after we had ended bizarre and unnecessary. But it had been months and I was ready to rip the Band-Aid. Georgia came with me. Robert insisted too.

It did end up being bizarre. I was unacquainted with going to an Arctic Monkeys concert and not talking to Alex beforehand. When they came on stage, their appearances were much like when I saw them last. Alex hadn't changed one bit, but his demeanor had. He was stiffer, not in a good or bad way, just an indistinguishable way.

New additions met my ears well with the bass of "Balaclava" ringing through me for days to come. I shifted around "Do Me A Favour" as details became obvious that the subject matter was concerning us and our teary eyes. It made me fidget but I loved it so I couldn't quite complain about the feeling of irk I got. My opinion changed when it was followed by "Mardy Bum" where I knew all of this was a conscious choice. It was an attack on my heart whose walls were still susceptible to incursion.

I found myself relating to songs that weren't written for me like I was the average listener. "Leave Before the Lights Come On" had a different meaning standing next to Robert. I felt ashamed for that and that made me enraged by Alex because without moving a muscle I felt like he was dictating my life through my hippocampus only.

After the show, we waited outside for the band. Georgia also found this insane. Robert said it was tragic but in a poetic way. I said they could go but both refused.

Jamie came out first with Katie who wrapped her arms around me which could be deemed as a threat to my life if it wasn't so loving. She did the same to Georgia and I laughed at the way Georgia flailed her arms around.

The rest of the band followed with Alex's eyes wide and looking between the floor and me, unable to process the sight in a simple glance. "Alright! We're heading back to Robert's place!" Matt shouted. His eyes on Alex became clear he was teasing him.

Regardless, I chuckled and hugged Matt. "No. I was hoping to join wherever you were going if you don't mind the intrusion."

"Never," Nick said, giving me a hug. Nick and I didn't know much about each other other than what Alex told each of us. I liked him because he had always greeted me with a wide smile, welcoming to all. He often seemed like he was just happy to be along for the ride wherever that ride took him. I like that quality very much.

As we walked out further into the street, the paparazzi snapped away, more at the band than the 3 dimwits following them, nevertheless, Robert began a potent rant against the invasion of paparazzi and how it was Big Brother and flexing that he had read 1984 as if it wasn't required reading for everyone in high school. He continued this the whole ride until we arrived at the pub.

It was premier service for a place that felt so unchic but I knew nothing about how the status of celebrity worked. Alex and I didn't go out enough for me to witness it. I had no qualms about using the complimentary service for my drinks.

In the booth, Robert sat with his arm around me. Our displays were often limited to his flat but when he stood to go use the restroom and kissed my cheek I knew what he was doing. I had to laugh, it was impossibly amusing.

I left for a cigarette. Alex followed a minute later. My back was against the wall as he approached. "Hi."

"Hi." I unconsciously handed him one. It was second nature.

He blew a puff out and asked, "You got a review for me?" That was also second nature.

I chuckled and shook my head, looking down at the floor. "Excellent as usual."

"Dry as ever, come on, Janie, you've got to give me more here."

I gave what I could. "I liked the new songs."

It seemed less jokey now as his laughter fell but he smiled at me sincerely. "Thanks."

"I'm sure the album will be great." I never doubted that. Even if he wrote the most scathing things about me, I would love it because he’d word it in such a way that I simply could not hate it.

Our conversation was like hitting a tennis ball back and forth but each time one of us hit it the other wouldn't hit it back. I thought about going inside. Then, he asked me, "You and Robert together?"

His bluntness had taken me aback and I focused on my cigarette to process the question. "Does Robert strike you as the boyfriend type?"

It made Alex laugh, which was the only relief in the world I would need. "I suppose not. Kissing you on the cheek and all—I'm sorry, not my business."

He was flustered, which made me laugh. He was small and cute when he was flustered, messing with his hair and shaking his head. "You know, he gets a kick out of making you jealous."

"Really?" Alex chuckled at the idea. I think Alex, for many years, viewed himself as the underdog, even if he was more famous, richer, cuter, and kinder than nearly anyone else I knew.

"I think you make him feel insufficient. I'm not sure why but he's always felt a need to overcompensate when you're around."

"So, he doesn't do stuff like that usually?"

I never liked lying to Alex. "No. But in full transparency, we are doing the hook-up thing or whatever."

He verged on saying something but closed his mouth and scuffed out his cigarette. I joined him in dropping mine. "Lucky him."

I pushed him light-heartedly. "Shut up."

We returned inside and Robert's arm returned around me. Later, when we were saying our goodbyes for the evening, he was loud in his exclamation that we were leaving together and returning to his flat. I had to hide my laughter. Robert's usual too-cool-for-school conduct faded at the sight of Alex. It made it funnier when Alex pulled me aside while everyone was saying their goodbyes.

"Are you coming to the show tomorrow?"

I shook my head.

"Come."

"I can't. I've got to babysit."

Matt interjected, "They let you around children?"

Before I could say anything, Alex told him, "Will you shut it, Matthew?"

When Matt moved away, Alex grabbed my hands. "Just come tomorrow. Another night of free drinks if you want."

I giggled at his earnestness. "I would if I could."

"Cancel. Come on."

"Al."

"Look, how many nights am I in town for? Come on, Janie."

His eyes wide, his mouth saying his name for me, and his hands clutching mine. I didn't say no.

My arms are crossed and my head is shaking the first time I hear "505" because I don't know what to make of it and I don't know what to make of this. Alex was dressed in a sky-blue Lacoste (this will be more relevant in a few years) and he pressed down on the keys as he pressed down on me.

I was having a hard time wrapping my head around it. I wasn't sure if I should cry or smile. The song left me uneasy and I felt I didn't know what was true anymore. That wavelength between us had been severed and I imagined Alex felt sad about our break-up but I never thought he was rethinking his actions and pining for that hotel room again. I had been the one to lament over our break-up and send it to him. He had stayed reserved in all his opinions and hid away his emotions. It wasn't a new thing by any means. But I did feel a sense of betrayal when I heard the information with 2,000 other people instead of under blankets and sheets, whispered in the dead of winter.

But I didn't want to talk about it so after the show I didn't bring it up. His mannerisms shifted from his awkward movement to more deliberately positioned as he hugged me after the show like he had done so many times before, sweaty.

"Drinks?" I asked him.

He moved back and forth between his left and right foot. "I was thinking I could see this new flat I keep hearing about."

Everything was intentional and obvious. "It's not very fabulous."

He waved me off. "I'm sure you've gushed the place up."

"Gushed the place up?" I questioned his verbiage.

Alex rolled his eyes and squeezed my upper arm. "Come on. Let me see the grounds."

Off we went on the underground to my flat, just the two of us. He kept jumping in his seat on the way over, citing excitement. "It feels out of place that I haven't seen your place," he said.

"Yeah. I know what you mean."

On our way up the stairs to my flat, Alex tried to challenge me to a race but my feet hurt and I couldn't believe he still had enough energy after performing concert after concert. My back was slumped and Alex was standing up perked as I unlocked the door.

"Georgia home?" He asked as we made our way through the door.

"With Kyle."

He nodded, tight-lipped. I could see the scene unfolding before him in his mind as we stood in the living room/kitchen hybrid. He looked around the room like he had actual interest in it before his eyes landed on me with a smile.

"Do you do this in every city?" I asked.

"Huh?"

"Al. You're easy to read."

He stuffed his hands in his coat pocket as he tried to fight that grin bursting across his face. "I wanted to see your place."

I rolled my eyes and walked toward my bedroom. "Yeah, sure." He followed behind like an obedient puppy.

He was attentive in looking around the room, nearly all those trinkets he had memorized from my old room had been replaced with new ones. The poster flier from one of Georgia's poetry readings, the Amy Winehouse ticket stub, and the dumb joke from Alex's Christmas cracker were pinned on my mini bulletin board. The paper crown and mini deck of cards sat displayed on my desk. A slight upturn came to Alex's cheeks at the sight.

His gaze moved back to me. "A lot smaller than your room back home."

"Yeah. Rent's expensive and I'm paying rent now."

"Out from under your dad's thumb." Seeing him as pleased with this as I had been was a happy sight. Those long chats in hidden coves where we'd be independent together. But as always Alex was happy for me even without having him as codependence.

Alex faked looking around my room more as I sat on the edge of my bed. He'd bend down to look at things like he was at a museum. His hands stayed in his pockets the whole time and he examined the corners and details of everything as if he'd be quizzed on it.

"Are you looking to see what you're going to steal from me?" I asked him.

He chuckled. "No, sorry. Just curious." He picked up the mini deck of cards, tossing it in his hands. "Round of Gin?"

"Alex." I wanted to be clear. "You came over here to play cards with me?"

His eyes were stuck on the deck's package, fiddling with the cardboard lid. "I just..." He shrugged multiple times and bounced on his feet. "I guess, I missed you, you know."

"Yeah." It was an easy sentiment to agree to because I feared I'd miss him for the rest of my life.

"We were in Tokyo a few weeks ago and I wanted to go see that Buddha you wrote about that, that, that—"

"Kamakura Daibutsu."

"Yeah." He looked down solemnly. "Wasn't there long enough to do it. I don't know. It just had me thinking about you and I know the relationship thing has sailed."

I didn't believe that. I didn't want to believe that. I had held on to those hidden beliefs that after all the madness we'd return to each other's side and all would be well. An abyss grew in me that Alex didn't believe that too.

"But," he continued. "But just all that shite that I'd done to make it worse and I vowed I'd never do that and I'm sorry for being a total dickhead."

"I did things too that I knew would hurt you."

"You did nothing."

"I slept with someone in Aruba."

He froze, his stare on me as he processed the information. "Uh, that's fine."

I shook my head. "Don't do that. I don't want to start acting like my parents."

"I don't want tonight to be this depressing," he laughed wetly.

"What did you want tonight to be?"

"I, I, to be—to hang out, to be with you."

"We could have done that at a pub. Why'd you want to come to my flat?" We looked at each other, both knowing the answer but waiting to see if the other would verbalize it.

He put the deck back on my desk and sat beside me. He stared forward at the wall for a moment before falling on his back. He rubbed his face as if to scrub it off, not wanting me to see the sight of it. My eyes never stopped following him. I was afraid to blink.

"My plan was to be all cute, tha knows."

"Aren't you always?"

The comment seemed to drop his guard a bit as he placed his hands on his chest. He took a deep breath and looked at me. His smile slowly grew as if it was being watered by the sight of me. "If you want to kiss me, you can."

I rolled my eyes and turned away from him but my smile was unavoidable.

"Come on." He tugged on my wrist. "You wouldn't let me endure one of the most embarrassing moments of my life."

I slapped away his hand's grip. "Quit mocking me."

He sat up. "I'm not mocking, Janie. I'm making the bad good." His face was right next to mine and it felt like the best move was to kiss him because kissing Alex could never be wrong even if he was leaving tomorrow and I would be left here.

So, therefore, having sex with Alex could never be an issue even though I slept with Robert the night before and I would sleep with him tomorrow. I wanted relief. The only solution was Alex in me. It was memorable.

His excitement worried me. "You're graduating in a few months. You could join us for festival season. It'll be in all those incredible places you want to go with beautiful weather. It'll be perfect. Where do you want to go? We'll go."

Lying in his arms had always been a comfort but now I felt this inevitability of hurting him with the false hope I had given. We lied on our sides, looking at each other, his hand draped over my waist.

"I don't know what kind of job I'll have after school. I might have to stay in London."

"We should hire you. You'll be our on-the-road journalist." His smile was infectious and I wished to have similar sentiments that once the obligation of school was done then we'd be fixed. But I wasn't going to kid myself.

I fell onto my back and clutched the bedsheet to my chest. "I think I'd be a bit biased. I don't want to be a journalist anyway."

"What do you want to be then, Janie?"

I shrugged. "I'll know when it's here."

Alex propped himself up on his elbow and quickly hovered over me. "You can't lie to me, Janie. You're a writer."

"Everybody's a writer," I argued.

He bit back a chuckle and shook his head. "Don't give me that shite for 4 years ago. You're a writer. I've seen it with my own two eyes."

"Well," I bite my lip, "there's this magazine, Granta, that I've submitted pieces to. I don't know if I want to do the whole freelance writer thing but I like writing what I want to write."

"Do it," he urged. "I'm not just saying that because you'll be able to come on the road with us."

I side-eyed him. "Sure."

"Have faith in me. I'm always looking out for the best for you. I'm always in your corner, Jane Cavendish."

It hit me. I knew it was the truth and he had always rallied for me so deeply even when we were far away from each other. "Ditto."

Alex rolled onto his back and looked at the ceiling. "Plus, you'll be able to see us headline Glastonbury."

I laughed but he didn't correct himself. I looked over and that smug bastard smirked at me and slowly nodded his head. "Fuck off. You're joking." He wasn't. Obviously.

Alex left for Liverpool at 6:30 AM. He shook me out of sleep saying he'd see me in a few weeks and kissed me.

Hours later, when I woke up, I would've figured I'd dreamt it if he hadn't written a note and placed it on my nightstand.

Come to Leadmill on the 21st & 22nd. I want a formal review. —A.T.

A couple of days later, Favourite Worst Nightmare dropped, including my—to this day—only songwriting credit on "Fluorescent Adolescent." I sent a text to Alex calling him a plagiarist. He told me to look out for the royalties check.

My relationship with Robert had remained unchanged but he gave the impression he knew what I had done with Alex. We never talked about it and when I left for Wakefield on the 20th he told me to tell the band he liked the album. I kissed his cheek. He was an annoying piece of shit but he was my friend. Few people understood it but we related to one another in a way I've never related with anyone. We were twin flames and it's why I couldn't handle him for more than a night at a time. We lit each other's fires but a fire is still a fire even if it keeps you warm on a cold night and burns you the next.

In Wakefield, my parents informed me they were moving. It had little to no effects on me other than sentimentality and having to clean out my childhood room. Stacey, however, would be uprooted and for that, I hurt.

My parents' guilt-tripped generosity allowed Stacey to attend The Leadmill show—her first Arctic Monkeys concert. She was slightly aware of the ambiguity of Alex and I's relationship and over the winter had prodded me for more. No one can claim to be a bigger fan of Alex Turner than Stacey, not even myself.

I wore my Arctic Monkeys tour T-shirt purchased at the London shows and Stacey wore the one I had purchased for her (I bought them at the merch table because it felt too awkward to ask Alex or the band for one. I used to just steal them. I decided to not hold the poor merch girl at gunpoint for a shirt). I drove my car there so Alex couldn't persuade me into drinks after. Stacey's coming eliminated any funny business. I wanted to get through school before starting anything up with Alex again. If I was even going to do that. I wasn't sure yet.

The setlist had a few new inclusions and Stacey jumped around freely. It was a beautiful sight of youth to see. It's the first time I really felt old at the thought that used to be me. Then, I felt stupid. I was a fresh 21, I had no clue how old old would really feel.

After the show, we congratulated the band on a good show and said good night. Alex told me to come to his parents' house before the show tomorrow. I accepted. I missed David and Penny. They would also be a good prevention buffer.

Up in his room, we sat on his bed and talked like the old days. There was much that had happened to talk about. Alex took the news of the house selling harder than me. I guess my sentimentality had rubbed off on him but I never viewed that house in the rose-coloured view that Alex did. But moments in my room I've locked away in my heart for just him and me. Things for only my ears to hear, my eyes to see, and my flesh to feel and vice versa for him.

After the show, we sat in my car.

"I feel like we're back to being 18," I told him.

"Why?"

I laughed to shield the seriousness with which I was speaking. "These trysts of ours."

"I already told Miles so." He had come out and performed "505" with them that night.

I rolled my eyes and chuckled. "Of course you did."

He shrugged helplessly.

"I'm still—well, I continued my thing with Robert. I'm not gonna lie to you."

"I kind of figured."

"I don't know how I feel about starting this again. Always being so far."

Alex sighed and leaned forward on his elbow on the center console. "After you've graduated that might not even be an issue."

"I'm not gonna follow you around like a puppy dog for years, Alex."

"I don't expect you to. But it could be fun this summer. After that, there'll be a break and we'll go wherever you pick. Swear it." He stuck his pinky out.

I bit the inside of my cheek and looked at his sweet face, always seeing so much with those big eyes. I loved him to pieces. Through all the struggles, there was that sweet face. So, I wrapped my pinky around his.

Alex was in Orlando when I graduated. He sent me a long email that is too long and personal to be printed in full here but here's an excerpt.

I think you should be a food reviewer that way we get into all the best restaurants that I'm not elegant enough to get into. Or you could just bat your eyelashes. Either would work I'm sure.

Be whatever you want. You'll be the best at it. Unless you want to do my job then stick to your day job otherwise I'll be out of one. Call me after, whenever you can. I wish I was there so imagine I am. It'll make me feel better.

He sounded like a dad. Some version of Atticus Finch morphed into a buffoon. I thought for hours about how to respond to the email. My eyes began to hurt so I just sent him photos from the day that Georgia had taken.

Georgia hid her discrepancies with me over abandoning the flat to "run off with Alex" as she said every time I brought up my summer plans. I sublet my room with full intentions of returning in September.

Robert was messier. We mutually seemed to agree that our sexual relationship would come to an end in May when we graduated. Robert held plans of going to New York and being a vagabond and I felt settled in London. Our activity had grown sparse after my trip to Yorkshire but didn't cease.

Two nights before graduation, I told him of my plans for the summer. He nodded along but laughed when I finished. "Whatever, Jane, be a fucking groupie all your life."

"I'm not."

He laughed maliciously at me. "I think you're scared of what comes after uni so you're clinging to this rich, successful ex-boyfriend. Play second fiddle to him. That's fine."

He was jealous. But I worried he was right.

I met up with the band in Dublin, which seemed fitting. It was easy to fall into the old habits of 2005 when I joined the band during the summer. However, Alex and I's relationship hadn't returned to what it had been. I slept in his bunk due to lack of space but that wasn't difficult. We struggled more with communication.

Their two shows in Dublin were messy and fanatical in the crowd. I stood backstage and listened to people singing along to a song I wrote. It didn't feel as out-of-body as I imagined and I wondered if Alex felt the same way when he heard the crowd singing along with him.

In between their first and second show in Dublin, Alex and I escaped to Wicklow, much to the annoyance of his management who worried the whole day that he had ditched the show. We returned in time, although we did cut it close.

We hiked the Glen Beach Cliff where the ocean kissed the mountains and I knew Alex wanted to complain the whole time but he didn't. His shoes were old, the seams nearly ripped open as we hiked the 3 miles. Below us, on the beach, were seals. It felt like a different world compared to the one we had experienced last night.

As we walked downhill, Alex wrapped his arm around me and despite nearly tripping several times and knocking me down with him, I refused to let him remove the arm.

"Are we dating again?" He asked.

It had been a largely neglected topic, mostly because I hadn't made my mind up about it. It was easy to be with Alex but being with Alex when we weren't actually with each other was frustrating. My biggest worry had always been ruining our friendship over the failure of our romantic relationship. Still, I wasn't sure of anything. "I guess."

He lightly chuckled. "That was enthusiastic."

"I'm sorry. I guess my question remains about what will happen after summer." The wind swirled around us and I tried my best to keep my hair out of my face.

"That's more a question for you than for me. You know what I want but I'm going to be happy for you whatever way you go. You know that right?" Alex has always been insistent on making sure I know he's steadfast in his support of whatever direction I decide to head and he has held true to that (mostly).

"Then, I'll need time to think about that. See what opportunities come my way this summer."

He nodded and tugged me closer. "This is over in December and then I'm all yours. Besides, I've already called you me girlfriend so you can't go back on it now."

In my sarcastic nature, I tossed my head on his shoulder, sounding, "Ugh! Don't be presumptuous, Al."

I got my favourite pair of sunglasses stolen at Glastonbury and I will hunt down the thief until the day that I die. Not that sunglasses were required for much of that day. The sky was dim, the ground was muddy, and it rained the whole weekend. We got there a day early to settle and like any night before a big show, it was spent drinking and horsing around late into the night.

Alex and I didn't get to bed until way past midnight and even then we had left Jamie, Matt, and other mates still fucking around. As we got ready for bed Alex had grown quiet, slow in his movements, and shrinking down into the small bed.

We laid down together and silence was awkward and he felt stiff. "You nervous?"

"Yeah," he laughed out in an effort to mask his nerves.

I curled my arm around and hugged him. I did my best to comfort him the way he always did for me. I held him tight and tried to possess a shoulder to cry on the best I could. "You know, I'll still love you even if you make a fool of yourself."

"Thanks." I leaned back to look at him as he struggled with a smile. His hand reached up and pushed my hair behind my ear. He held my cheek and it felt like his muscles had finally relaxed. "I'll try my best not to. I know you don't want to be stuck with a fool."

"Aren't you already?"

He rolled his eyes and was relieved with a laugh. "Maybe only for you."

"That's so cheesy. You should be put in jail."

"As long as you were there."

I slapped a thunk onto his arm. "Stop it, you. I'll imprison you. Shush!"

He resisted my push away from him, wormed his arm under me, and landed the other over me. He wiggled us close and he felt like a preheated oven as my bones were left out to defrost. "Are you happy? Excited?"

Alex often needed me to reassure him during this period of our lives, especially after we got back together. That summer our relationship was ambiguous and it was easy for Alex to fear that at the first sign of unhappiness, I would ditch him. He wasn't exactly wrong. I wouldn't have left if Glasto sucked but if I became unhappy with Alex, it was an easy out for me. I've always appreciated easy outs.

"Yeah. I wish I had a camera. Then, I could sell them all to The Sun and make a killing."

"Is all this okay with you?" More questions. Another valid one. An undiscussed topic had often been I, an at-the-time unknown, being pulled into the public eye for my attachment to Alex. It's not like he was some tabloid superstar but it didn't leave me as a virtual unknown, especially with the band only getting bigger.

I nodded, my ear rustling against the pillow. "No stalkers. Except maybe you." He hadn't left my side since we arrived. I couldn't complain one bit. For once, I wasn't the clingy one.

He mused, "What can I say? I love you."

"Stop." Too cheesy, too cheesy.

Alex laughed into his pillow. He softened up and inched closer to me on our tiny bed. "Why didn't you bring your camera?" My photograph production had declined since college but I still held onto the habit.

I frowned. "It broke right before graduation."

"The ol’ Canon finally bit the dust,” he joked. It had been the only camera I ever owned. I used my mother’s old cameras when I took that photography class with Matt. I never bothered investing more in it than what I could borrow. “We can pick up another one."

I sighed. "Too much money. I'm an independent woman now."

"Oh, damn, you need me to be your daddy now."

I pushed him off the bed.

We mudded up our wellies the following day to see Amy Winehouse before the rain poured in full force again. I think it relaxed everyone to feel like we went to Glasto just to enjoy it and not actually headline it. We nodded our heads along with the songs and stood with our hands stuffed into our pockets.

Opposing Alex's nerves, I was wracked with excitement. I went off into my own world during Glastonbury and wanted to enjoy the hippie nature and the history. I loved the whole weekend. The nights after watching The Killers and The Who and I'm pissed with Arctic Monkeys to this day for having me miss Björk to watch their stupid headline set.

Dressed in their overcoats and Matt with his Adidas track pants, their set went off without a hitch and I had fun dancing with Katie and briefly with Dizzee Rascal before he joined them onstage for "Temptation Greets You Like A Naughty Friend." The road had and would be lonely but it was eased a little bit by having another girl by my side. When Miles came out and joined the band for "505" I thought of Eva. I hadn't talked or heard about her since The Little Flames disbanded. I shamed myself for it. I had become a person who held onto objects that reminded you of a person as an excuse to no longer see them. The thought crossed my mind that Georgia was my only friend and I hadn't talked to her since I joined the band on the road. Then, Katie hugged me to her side and I felt a little less lonely.

I had grown desensitized to the meaning behind Alex's songwriting. I never stopped and thought about how he was singing songs that were rooted in our break-up because it no longer seemed important because we were together and how the past could affect the future. But there was this moment during "Do Me A Favour" where he had seemed rather emotional, furiously strumming his guitar and rushed singing close to his microphone. I felt ashamed for not having the same reaction as him. I felt like I was missing a gene by not crying at "Mardy Bum" or not swooning at "I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor" but I suppose night after night, I just became numb to the meanings of those songs. I wish I hadn't. I wish I enjoyed it more but everything felt fleeting so I made no effort to cherish moments at that age.

When they got off stage the thought had floated away and we were ready for a night of exhausted celebration. The weather was rough and the band had their casual round of press before we enjoyed drinks and party favours in the camper. Alex and I made out against the door of a porta-potty at one point. It was very disgusting.

I fulfilled more travel fantasies with this tour. The limitations no longer sat in Great Britain and Ireland as we moved up to Scandinavia, first stopping in Oslo. I was set loose and skipped their concert, instead visiting the Akershus Fortress and seeing "The Scream" at the Munch Museum finally returned to its home after being stolen in 2004 (although, I'm partial to Munch's "Madonna" but that's neither here nor there). In Stockholm, I continued this by going to the Vasa Museum and in the evening hiking up to Skinnarviksberget and watching the sunset, but, sadly, no Northern Lights.

We continued the festival run going through Germany and then Rock Werchter where at this point I should have broken the world record for seeing Lily Allen live as I once again watched her on the Pyramid Marquee before seeing my boys on the Main Stage.

A festival or so later, a day off was given before their Paris show, and, in a way, I finally got my Parisian dream. The hotel was nice and the toilet worked like how a normal toilet works but Alex and I shared a room. Privacy for the first time since his room in Sheffield. We did the obvious, a few times.

It's weird to put it how sex works with Alex and me. It's like a weird recalibrating device. I suspect it's because our relationship started through it that whenever we need to get back on the same page fucking seems to help. It was late and we shared a cigarette after because you can do that then in Paris. I would talk, he would smoke it, then he would talk, I would smoke it.

"You and Katie have become best mates," he said. Katie had returned back to England a few days prior and I once again was the lone girl.

"I like her a lot. She's a calm presence amongst the chaos."

"Yeah, she's done Jamie a world of good. Calmed him a bit." That was undeniably true. Jamie had always been a kind and caring guy but he had an uncontrollable craze at times and a mouth that poured at things that maybe shouldn't have been said. Katie seemed to kick him and keep him in check.

I have always been fascinated with how people change people. Somewhere at our center these people worm their way in and change your hardwiring or maybe they just expose what has always been there. "Have I calmed you?"

Alex chuckled. "Quite the opposite I think."

"Hey!" I became jokingly affronted. "I can be a calm presence. You lot are the ones who are messing around so much."

He continued to laugh at me. Eyes bright and smile light. He reached over and began to pet my hair. "I don't think calm would be the right word." I thought about hitting his chest but that would prove his point. "I just think you've made me more confident."

It was a peculiar thought to me. I didn't feel confident most of the time and I was nowhere near the confidence of going on stage and headlining festivals as a band's frontman. "How?" I asked.

He reached back to stub out the cigarette on the ashtray on the bedside table but he kept his hand steady on the side of my head, rubbing smooth circles. He returned closer and with a soft smile. "In a lot of ways. Your encouragement." I couldn't argue with that. Alex had done the same for me tenfold. "I feel like if you believe in me, even if I fuck up out there, you'll still be here." I wanted to always be there. I hated how life got in the way and people stayed and others went and I just wanted to stay in little corners of the world with Alex forever. But in those early years, it was an impossibility. We tried our best.

"Plus, you're smoking hot." I rolled my eyes but I was, of course, charmed by the comment (I mean, I wrote it here for a reason. I want everyone to know he finds me smoking hot). "Do you know the power I have by having you as a girlfriend? For god's sake, Robert almost kicked my ass over you."

I pushed away from him. "Ew. Don't talk about Robert when I'm naked."

"Why? You've been naked with him."

Forces froze and I waited to see if he had more to say or if I had anything to say but we both felt chilled by the awkwardness. I slowly sat up more against the headboard and rested back against it. "Were you hurt by that?"

"What?"

"Me having sex with Robert because you don't really have a right to be pissed." I was defensive because I was in the right but I also framed his words as an attack.

Alex was slow in his response, I guess he was trying to find the best way to say what he was thinking without me biting his head off for it. "No. I mean, you're right. There's no reason to be pissed."

I wanted to know his real feelings. I knew he wouldn't shame me for doing it but I wondered if he felt the act of Robert and I's relationship was an attack against him. I played with my fingernails and we didn't make eye contact. We were two planks beside one another. "But were you?"

I peeked over. His shoulders shrugged and he looked down at his hands. We were mirror images of each other. "I don't know. I mean, I don't like the idea of you being with anyone else. Truthfully, Robert annoys me so I guess that confused me or upset me more. But I love you, you know." He looked over. Insistent on this part. "And that's not going away. I figured that out a long time ago. As much as I love the idea that I get to be with you for...you know, I know that I can't get everything I want. But I want you to get all that. I want it more for you than for me. You got that?"

It took me a while to regain control. I was stuck between smiling so wide my face ripped into two and crying until my eyes fell out. I took a shaky breath. "Yeah. But I want all that for you too so you're right back to getting everything you've wanted again because I want that."

"You're always forcing me to take care of myself, Janie."

I hugged him. I needed to touch him. To hold him. I whispered into his neck, "It's 'cause I love you, you know."

When the tour went on break I went with Alex to Black Box Studios in Maine-et-Loire, France where he and Miles recorded the first Last Shadow Puppets album. The whole album was recorded in a matter of 2 weeks but nothing about it was rushed. The landscape was lush and the downtime felt like something out of an Eric Rohmer film.

On the last few dates of the tour, we ended up in Sydney. It was the only time during the tour that I got the urge to call my mother. I didn't because my Nokia couldn't call that far but I sent her and my father a postcard and I bought Stacey Uggs, authentic Uggs. We had a day off where we went to Bondi Beach where Matt and I braved the cold water. Afterwards, we visited the zoo where I got to hold a koala. I felt like holding a baby, except with the softest fur imaginable. Afterward, I pouted about not being allowed to own one so Alex bought me a koala stuffed animal.

A week after, the band went to play Summer Sonic in Osaka and Tokyo. I went back home for a week. It wasn't intentional, the dates just lined up that way but it felt best to skip such a rough place. Alex has a habit of embodying the mood of places based on memories. This behavior can likely only exist for a guy who has been to so many places.

I joined The Last Shadow Puppets a few days into recording. When I arrived, Miles and Alex had just returned from riding their bikes together. They looked like twins, shaggy-haired and brown-eyed boys. Alex threw his bike down and tossed his arm over to me like we were two buds, just getting off our shift at work. It filled me with endless excitement. Then, Miles came over and cupped my face, pinching my cheeks. I slapped him away and we went inside and had dinner.

At that dinner table, I could picture a whole future. Ones where Alex and I had Miles over our house, our little stray puppy. Nights where we all went out drinking and he crashed on our couch. Miles and I would both be hungover and Alex would give us painkillers and make us scrambled eggs.

Side-by-side, Alex and I brushed our teeth. It was a greater act of love than a marriage proposal.

I had begun to videotape these Shadow Puppets. On the morning of my second day there, Alex and I were lounging around in bed when he told me he had a little present. He came out with a camera, a Pentax 17.

"For me?" I pointed to myself, holding the delicate thing, cradling it like my baby.

He snorted a laugh. "Who else?" He petted my hair back and he was the sweetest man who ever lived.

In those two weeks, I didn't have many subjects. Most of the footage and pictures were of Miles and Alex. James Ford, who produced and drummed with the Puppets, made some appearances. I slipped by in a couple too. I began to develop this plan to make a documentary on the band. It fell through, mainly because when they went to do the orchestral parts of the album in December, I couldn't go, and I was also lazy. They used some of it for a 4play documentary but it wasn't the vision I had. Alex says I would have won an NME award (I have desperately wanted to win one solely for the middle finger trophy. Alex has plenty, only one on display for joking sake, but I would beg to win one. It might have been my only chance). It probably would have sucked. I've never worked with actual film to make a movie. I never worked with anything to make a movie because I've never made a movie. I will never make one either. Because I am lazy. But, I guess, I'll get through the rest of this book and stop interrupting the flow of the story by telling you I'm getting ready to write more of this book which you will read now. Or now. Now. Now. Now. Now. Now.

Now, I have filmed much more on that camera other than Miles and Alex skipping through great fields and picking daisies, although I still shoot that too. If I could submit home videos for the NME Awards, I would have won one by now.

Most afternoons we rode bikes around the tiny town. I would occasionally drop into the studio out of pure boredom but I spent the majority of my downtime writing or exploring. One afternoon, the trio of us biked by Château d'Armaillé. It was a lofty manor contrast to the farms and livestock breeders we usually biked by. I stopped and stared as I usually do.

"Can you believe people lived in that thing?" I questioned, completely mesmerised.

Alex laughed, already pleased with his joke. "Yeah, isn't that the size of your family home?"

On our last night there we had a little dinner party with everyone we had come across at Black Box Studios in the two weeks we had been there. Since this was pretty much the middle of nowhere, there were very few people. But it felt celebratory to end this little project with gloriously catered French food and playing dress-up. It was mainly an excuse for me to wear a vintage dress I had found at a used clothing store in Nantes when I was waiting for a car out to Black Box.

It was a white drop-waist dress with a little bow on the side of my hip and a skirt with a light lace overlay. It was paired with a cloche hat that I regretfully didn't buy, but I still have the dress. Alex wore a button-down and slacks but Miles and I talked him into wearing a stupid top hat that had been lying around Black Box for the 2 weeks we were there. Alex ended up taking it home with him, although he does not still have it. Miles wore shorts, a grey T-shirt, and a bowtie.

The food and conversations were far more important with the most delicious potatoes I've ever tasted that were mixed with a sauce that I might forever be wondering what it was but my tongue can still feel the taste. The wine was white and Alex dropped his glass on the floor halfway through the dinner, which he doesn't want me to mention, which means I totally will be mentioning it (obviously).

His arm rested on the back of my chair and our plates had long been cleared and the dessert, Gâteau Nantais (a delicious almond pound cake, soaked in rum, and topped with glaze—I really, really liked these meals), had been picked away at. I was still eating the crumbs of my second slice and Alex drank from his new wine glass. I could see futures, but for the first time, I felt like this was the future. Friends, old and mostly new, surrounded us and we drank and ate and talked and laughed and the warmth of Alex radiated on me. I was in love with everything.

"Will Jane be heading back on the road for North America?" James asked Alex.

He turned to me with his teeth showing, smiling enough for sparks to come off it. Pride radiated off of him; it still makes me want to cry. "As of this morning, Miss Cavendish has a job with Simon & Schuester."

When I told Alex, I was cautiously concerned that his worries would overshadow the news, but I never doubted he'd be happy for me. I got the call when he was brushing his teeth. I told him when he returned to our room and he grabbed my hands and made me jump on the bed with him. (Shall I avoid the Monkeys Jumping on the Bed joke?).

The table cheered loudly and drunkenly. "Oh, shit, I know those two boys!" Miles, sooooooo drunk, exclaimed. I bashfully tucked my chin down, avoiding the attention.

Alex's hand skimmed over my left shoulder. He bent down to kiss my downturned cheek and it was like my crush just kissed the spot—my cheeks flushed red and my heart pounded on the gates of my ribs.

I waved for the noise to quiet down. "It's just an editorial assistant position."

Alex squeezed my shoulder, looking over at me, and rolling his eyes. "Cut it with that rubbish, Janie. It should have been the first thing we cheers to when we sat down."

He reached for his wine glass and I shoved his arm away. "Stop it. You're flustering me." His breath smelled of Chardonnay and his behavior spelled out drunk—his bubbly drunk phase, which is the most flattering phase. He leaned over kissing my cheeks repeatedly making the table erupt in noise again. I took a grip on his face and tried to push him away.

"I've made you all red," he boasted. Alex's face was all red too but it was likely more to do with the alcohol than me. "It's time to cheers, Janie." He motioned toward my almost empty wine glass. I shook my head. "Time to cheers, Janie," he insisted.

"You sure you aren't going to drop your glass again?" I teased.

"Oh, shut it, you," he said, but he laughed and tugged me close to him. I almost thought he was going to give my head a noogie.

He drank all the wine out of his glass before raising it. "To Jane Cavendish, Simon & Schuester Editorial Assistant."

I started on a Wednesday and I did little editing in my editorial position. But Helen, one of the editors, gave me old drafts they hadn't published and the book and told me to pick all the differences out and she would be quizzing me on it the next day. I went out drinking with Lee and Georgia and came in hungover the next day. Helen said I was the first editorial assistant she had that didn't fall for the quiz prank. That endeared her to me and she became my mentor.

Alex was off doing interviews about virginity for the Virgin Fest and I had never been more thankful I didn't lose my virginity to him. I used to wish that and tell Stacey when assuring her not to lose it so young. But it's probably best since I'd associate the time I lost my virginity with an interviewer from AXS Uncut asking Alex to name virgins.

I had moved back in with Georgia and her new girlfriend, Kyle, who was always a sweetheart, even if she didn't do the dishes. They weren't the annoying kind of couple to live with. They weren't loud and I never felt like the third wheel around them. It was easy for my mind to drift to Alex. I would relive the way Black Box felt. While the majority of it felt like a vacation, at its core, we were coming home each night together. The home is what we lacked on the road and the togetherness is what we lacked at home. I just thought of him being in my bed, sleeping. I always liked the way he looked sleeping.

Alex called more than he did on the last tour. I guess he had learned a lesson. Being in North America was a bit easier than when he'd been in the Eastern Hemisphere since he was only 6 hours behind. He'd call me when I got off work before he'd perform his concert and we would talk of the monotony of my day. A couple of hours later, usually while I was sleeping, he'd text me about how the concert went. It was usually only one word: "Good." "Great." "Best." "Sucked." "Wanker." "Drunk."

We had fallen into a pattern and although it seemed dull, it was successful. My heart still ached and sometimes the sight of Georgia and Kyle made me want to stick my head in the oven, but he was there when I needed him, even though he couldn't be here.

Working felt comfortable and, for once, I eased into that comfort. I got after-work drinks with editors and fellow editorial assistants. I'd joke around with superiors at work and I'd go home to Georgia and Kyle, who had made dinner for me. Georgia was working various gigs, but still heavily focusing on poetry. Kyle worked as a set developer, which meant our living room looked like a craft store had exploded. I didn't mind. I spent most of my off-time in my room and would only venture to the living room when we watched TV together.

However, when the North American leg finished at the beginning of October, Alex dropped by, and with a clicking of his tongue and the shaking of his head, he said, "Oh, Janie. You've got glitter everywhere." He said this in front of Kyle, so I hit the back of his head and dragged him to my bedroom.

Alex's stay at our flat during October was never agreed upon, he just showed up and I'd never turn him away. A week in, however, Georgia asked me when it was just the two of us in our kitchen, early in the morning before I headed off to work, "So, is he like living with us now?"

I shrugged. "No. I mean, he'll be back on the road before the end of the month."

"How do you feel about that?" What a good therapist she would be.

"Better than last time. I'm occupied now. I don't have to worry about lying around all the time thinking of him."

"You're a big girl now, Cavendish. But if he stays past a month, he will have to pay rent."

I laughed out loud. "I doubt he'll be living here with us."

"All I’m saying is rich rockstar can pitch in on groceries."

I told Alex of this conversation and he took me to the store to point out all of Georgia's favourite food goodies and bought them for her. Georgia felt bad after that until she had Jelly Babies. Then, she insisted Alex buy groceries every week.

On Alex's last night at the flat, he bought takeaway for everyone and watched I'm a Celebrity...Get Me Out of Here! with us. Several jokes were made about Alex doing the show, but I don't think Alex could eat a bug or be stuck with Katie Hopkins for a month. After dinner, Georgia and Kyle left for a "late-night poetry reading" or more likely avoid-the-lovebirds game.

Alex and I showered, changed into pajamas, and brushed our teeth together. In two parentheses, curled to bookend one another, Alex brushed his hand down my side. I told him, "I hope you get a good tan in South America."

"I'm too pale for you, Janie?"

"Maybe your butt," I giggled. It was some form of drunk-in-love. I felt rush through me every time he looked at me. It was like taking a hit.

"Wish you could come with us," he said. He was sober in his tone but his eyes were glazed over.

"Me too, but I'm happy here. I love my job and it sucks to not be with you but—"

He smiled—beamed bright and overwhelming. "But you're happy." He curled into me. My manners had transferred to him as he curled his arms around me and dug his face into my neck. "I'll be back for a week in November."

"And you'd come back here?" I questioned. There was a touch of uncertainty in everything we did that year, mostly because we had never even said we were back together and the other part was the reason for our break-up.

Alex lifted his head, his smile still showing. "Yeah." He sounded so happy and sunny. It was a cocoon of bliss. The young love I had always wanted. His fingers traced over my shoulder, making little finger drawings. His eyes looked down on his creation, avoiding my eyes. "And then we've got two shows here in December and then that last show in Manchester, which I thought maybe you could take off work and come up for. It's on a Monday so understandable if you can't."

I smiled at him but I'm unsure if he saw it due to his shy gaze dodging my face. "I'll try my best. I'll definitely be at the London ones."

His face was aglow but attentive to his finger tracing. "And then I was thinking, maybe—I don't know—maybe I'd come back to London."

I lightly chuckled. "You're not banned from the city. You're always welcome here. Georgia and Kyle like you a lot."

"I like them too but I was thinking we could stay somewhere else."

"What? Like a hotel?"

He finally looked me in the eye. "No, maybe we move in together. Like, get our own place. Maybe. It was just a thought."

It pleased me to no end. The thought wrapped its way around me the first time we slept together and over three years later to encounter the reality of it, I couldn't believe it. "A flat for just the two of us?"

"Yeah. I know you like it here but maybe we could find somewhere that I'm not finding specks of glitter all over my clothes."

I giggled all over him. "Yeah, yeah. I'd like that too. I'd like anywhere as long as you're there."

Alex shook his head with a big smile like he couldn't believe it. He hugged me, kissing my cheek, and then...then we did other stuff, you know.

People have asked me if Alex plays songs for me. They've imagined a world in which Alex sings me a lullaby every night. And I guess the answer is "yes" but I'd say more of a "sort of" situation. Alex would often strum his guitar to me but not in a dedicative format. It was something he would have done if I was there or if I wasn't. So, I would say he never did it for me.

Except once.

He was back in London and he had arrived late the night before. I was in my jammies and my slippers when he arrived and he made fun of me for my pajama pants that had Christmas elves printed on them.

I was waiting on my bed for him to return from the bathroom. He came back, chilly from the lack of heating; Georgia and I weren't turning it on again this winter. He paced around my room before he asked, "Can I play you something?"

I furrowed my brows. "Like a song?"

He nodded and picked up his guitar. "I'm gonna do it on Radio 2 tomorrow. Like a little teaser for what's to come."

"So, this is a song for the next album?"

He shrugged. "Maybe." We never talked about the next thing, which was a problem and not a good choice for our reunited relationship.

Alex adjusted his guitar on his lap and sat in front of me, playing "Fire and the Thud" to me. He had never been that overtly romantic in a song before. Songs on the previous two albums never felt like love songs, but rather songs of longing or infatuation. But it felt like he had written this song for me as he played it for me.

It would be one of the sweetest things anybody has ever done for me if he didn't go on to do even more songs for me. Not to brag or anything.

After he put his guitar down, I curled my arms around his neck and yanked him down with me to lay back on the bed. "You like it?"

"Loved it. I love everything you write."

"Yeah, but you really loved this one right?"

"Sure."

A few weeks later, when Alex and I returned from the final show of the Favourite Worst Nightmare tour, we moved into a new flat. Together. I had picked the flat out. Alex said whatever I liked he'll like and I wasn't going to argue being the sole picker.

We moved in at a record speed, mainly because I had very little stuff and Alex had nothing, everything still back home in his childhood bedroom. My parents had officially moved down to Bath and I had received scathing phone calls from Stacey. I still feel sorry for that poor teenage girl.

Alex and I got a studio, which I liked because it felt artsy and a total adult thing to share a studio with your boyfriend. Later, it would be the start of many fights between Alex and me because I never had any privacy.

We had our bed in one corner, the kitchen in the other, and a small bathroom down the hall. Plus, it was in Clerkenwell, which was closer to work. We had his record player on the floor and a shared dresser. It was a greater act of love than sex or writing songs. It was his things mixed with mine.

We weren't there for very long. We each went back to our family's homes for Christmas, which suddenly was no longer the same area. Our time apart was short and when we returned we cleaned up the rest of our shared apartment and decided to have a New Year's Eve party.

It was wild debauchery from start to finish. Though we provided liquor, it seemed like every guest came with their own stash. I hadn't realized how many friends Alex had in London. His number of guests heavily outweighed mine but it didn't have much of an issue. Everything was communal and it was truly a night where everyone seemed free. Maybe it was the New Year's part or maybe it was being in the start of our early 20s. When I look back on this time, I forget how young I was. 17 and slutting up the streets at Barnsley and how in 4 years, I had obtained an establishing job and lived in London with my boyfriend. It was a dream book experience and like most things it was a small portion of our lives. But I felt straight out of a movie with this ending to the year I had received.

Katie and I hid in a corner to talk close together to avoid all the noise. We shared a drink and both drowned in heavy alcohol consumption but we loved each other very much and I knew we'd be friends forever (I was very drunk when I thought this and slurred this to her but time has held this statement to be true. Drunk words are sober futures). "I'm going to marry him," I told her. We were watching Jamie attempt to throw Alex over his shoulder, fireman-style. Alex was a sweet ragdoll, laughing about and swaying.

Jamie was the loyal rescuer. "I'm going to marry him too," she slurred back to me. "We'd be like band sisters-in-law."

"Aw," I cooed. "I don't have a sister-in-law." (I mean, I do, my brother's wife, but I was referring more to Alex being an only child and I was wildly drunk. Forgive me, Cecilia).

"Then I can be yours!"

Before midnight, only a minute or so before, Alex and I huddled up in the kitchen with our closest friends of the bunch. Matt and Jamie were arguing about who had drunk more and we all watched on laughing. I was burrowed under Alex's arm. He was the cave I chose to hibernate in this winter.

"Don't forget the beer you had before coming here," Alex egged Matt on.

"Yes! And the beer I had 'fore coming here!" Matt sloppily shouted to Jamie.

I pulled on Alex's hand he had thrown over me. "Don't they know I'm the drunkest?"

Alex chuckled. "Yes, with that breath you probably are." He was quite sober compared to the rest of us. Mostly because he knew how drunk I would be getting and somebody had to make sure our new place didn't get destroyed.

I pulled back, offended. "It is not that bad."

"Yes, it is," he laughed.

"So bad you won't kiss me at midnight?" I hung off of him. You'd think we were in some basement in Wakefield.

He moved his hand down to the arch of my back to steady me. "I could never not kiss you."

My eyes snapped over to him, and I raised my eyebrows with a smirk. "Really? I don't recall that being the truth."

He laughed again. "Fair enough." But then he leaned in and kissed me until way after midnight, making out in the kitchen. It was disgusting and I loved the whole thing.

Nick knocked into us as he moved through the kitchen. "I'd tell you to get a room but we're all in it." He laughed, pleased with his joke, and moved to grab another beer.

Later in the evening, Nick threw up on our bed. Nick was the drunkest.

Somewhere around one in the morning, I sat on Alex's lap and his arms were around me, holding me close to him as I talked to Georgia on one side of the couch and Alex talked to Miles on the other side of the couch. We held separate conversations about separate lives but he held me to him and he held me tight.

a/n: sigh, this is all i can think about writing as of late. i am a series girl after all.

#alex turner fic #alex turner x fem!reader #alex turner x oc #alex turner x reader #alex turner x y/n #alex turner x you #alex turner #alex turner smut #junedenim #beneath the boardwalk

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small-sinclair · 1 year

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Forgive Them

A little dabble of Bo being a dad and meeting his wife a new friend. This is how they met, the reader from Take Me Instead and I Promise I’ll Always Love You.

Part 2

Bo x mother fem!reader

Tw: HEAVY physical abuse, mention of death, sexual stuff mentioned, forced miscarriage, abusive parent, happy ending??

“What’re gonna do?” Lester’s voice drawls over the phone. “They got a kid.”

“I’ll figure somethin’ out, Les,” Bo said as he was walking towards the front door of the shop. “'M not too worry.”

“But ’s a baby—“

“Les,” Bo warned, “I got it.” With that, he hung up and adjusted his hat. He walks towards the door and walked out. He went to the garage door and pulled it up to show off the car he’s been working on.

Ambrose hasn't had a family come through in a while, so it'll be perfect for Vincent to practice to make a happy family. Bo knew he would never have something like that, and it hurts to think of it. He thought he would be a good father, a better father than his own. He thought of building fences around the house, a front swing for him and his sweetheart to watch their kids run around. A dog or two. He craved for that type of life he was promised when he was a kid. If not that, he hoped that he was going to be a good uncle if his brothers married.

He pushed the thoughts away as he popped the hood of the car and started looking at the belt and spark plugs. The car came in after the last group, and he thought he might fix it up good and have Lester sell it in the town over. If not, he'll strip it for parts and sell them.

Bo wondered if his kid would want to learn how to fix cars.

He heard footsteps coming closer to his shop but pays no mind to act like he’s too busy. He was thankful the family came before his thoughts swallowed him whole.

“Excuse me?” A man asked, getting Bo’s attention. “You Bo?”

Bo looked over his shoulder and wiped his hands with the rag in his back pocket. “Yes, sir. That’s me.” He sees the mother and her holding a child’s hand. He could see a bump growing, showing she had another bun in the oven. Lester never said anything about that over the phone, but he won't pay mind to it for a while. He'll worry about that later. “What can I do for ya?”

He didn’t like how there was a fading black eye on you. Once you noticed he was looking, you gave a smile, making him look at your husband. It's better if you hide behind your man, y/n, but your child needs you more.

“The driver said you have a battery?” The man placed his hands on his hips. “Were in a hurry, too, so—“

“Come inside and I’ll show you what I got,” Bo said, cutting him off. “We can talk cars while your woman takes junior to the House of Wax.” He flashed you a smile and a quick wink. “An' the AC can help t' heat. Can’t have Mama passing out to heat, can we?”

The man’s eye twitched as he kept his fake smile. He turns to you and nodded for you to leave. “I’ll be there in a moment. Take Jasmine with you, y/n.”

Y/n... what a beautiful name, Bo thought with a smile.

Bo lifted a brow as he looked at the little girl in a bright green dress, white little sandals, and her hands clutched a stuffed pink bear. Bo smiled at her and gave a little wave. “Jasmine, huh?” He knelt down, ignoring the man for a moment. “Ain’t she pretty?”

Shyly, the little girl waved back before hiding behind her mama. He saw the banged up knee and too big bruised on her arm, fresh and bright. If Bo didn’t have restraint, he would’ve killed your husband then and there, but there was a child. He couldn’t let that side show in front of a child. She must've been an one-year-old but she was so small and tiny.

You clear your throat, holding the bump close. “We’ll be waiting, Toddy.” Then you flash a smile towards Bo. It melted his heart, just for a moment. “Thank you, mister.”

“Just call me Bo, ma’am,” he said, tipping his trucker’s hat. He took you in like a sunset over the gulf. He'll get rid of Todd; don't worry.

“Just call me y/n,” you gave a smile. As soon as the smile came, it faded as Todd glared at you, his back turning away from Bo just he doesn’t see.

“I’ll walk you up there,” Todd said suddenly. “It’s just up the road, right?”

Bo nods. “Yeah, but it’s not far—“

“Like you said, the heat’s not good for her,” he walked to your side, his hand gripping your wrist. “Won’t be long.”

Bo swallowed hard but he forces a nod. He knows you begging him to come with you, your eyes tearing up. He knows your pain, he knows you’re hurting, but he has to play up his act. He has to keep up the dumb hick mechanic. He’s sorry, y/n… he’s so sorry.

“Sounds fine," he gave a fake grin. "I'll meet ya there in a few."

************

"What did I tell you?" Todd hissed as soon as they were far enough from the mechanic. His grip around your arm was too tight, leaving a mark right away.

"I was being friendly, honey," you defended yourself.

Todd rolled his eyes as he pulled you along. "yeah, right. I bet you want to fuck him, too."

"Excuse me?"

"I saw the way you were looking at the driver, too," he spat as he turned to corner that the House of Wax was on. The green building stood tall over the street as its shadow casts over you and your child. "Bet you would spread your legs if they just asked."

You clinched your jaw, trying to pull away from his grip. "Can we not do this now? Jasmine--"

"That little fucker doesn't understand anything," Todd pulled your arm harder and tighter. "I'm giving you this one chance, y/n. One. Last. Chance." His words were filled with venom and blood, his dark brown eyes narrowing at you as he let go. He went up the steps and opened the door to the house. "Act up."

He didn't have the door open long enough for you to walk through. you caught the door just in time before it would close on Jasmine. You didn't have much of a choice when it came to Todd. He was your brother's best friend. He acted so nice around your family, smiling for your mother, laughing with your father, befriending everyone but you. He was nice to you though in the beginning, but he changed after moving you away from your hometown. There were thoughts of packing and leaving in the middle of the night, but he had such a short leash on your that you were scared. No matter where you went, Todd found you. So, you stayed and tried, but how long until you give up on trying, y/n? How much does that cost?

Inside, the AC unit was running at full blast as if Bo knew you were coming here this morning, and your sighed with a small grin. The place is dusty but you can see the art just fine. You used to oil paint back when you were happy and fill with life. You scooped up Jasmine and placed her on your hip. Little grabby hands reached for a waxed butterfly handing from the ceiling, and it caused you to laugh to yourself. The best thing Todd ever gave you was Jasmine, and you'll be damned if he tries to take that from you.

"That's a butterfly, darling," you said in a song voice. "Can you 'butterfly'?"

"She's too dumb to figure that out," Todd murmurs as he looks at a waxed figure. "Jeez, these things are creepy." He looks back at you, forcing you to nod your head in agreement. You didn't want to risk another fight. "I shouldn't be long, y/n. Think you could keep your legs closed long enough?"

"Todd, stop it!" You looked down at Jasmine then found an open couch for her to sit on. "I'm not a whore--"

A loud smack echoed throughout the house. His ringed hand stung as you went to the floor of the waxed house. You held your jaw as tears fell from your eyes. You hated that you cried so easily. When you looked up at Jasmine, you watched as her nose crinkled up and she started crying. Her face turned a bright red as she wiles echoed in the house.

"Oh my god!" Todd shouted at Jasmine, stepping over you. "Shut up-!"

You shot up from the floor and pulled him away from Jasmine, taking his attention. "Don't touch her!" You pushed him away and stood between your child and him. "Don't! She's a baby, Todd! She doesn't know better!" You didn't know there was a dark figure watching from the corner, his heavy blue eye watching your every move. "Don't--!"

You were met with another blow from the man, his fist hitting your eye. You took a few steps back before you could register the hard fist hitting your stomach, right on the little bump. You fell on your knees as you held your stomach as you tried to catch your breath. When you looked up at him, you were met with a kick over your shielded stomach. You felt something inside you crush as you laid on your side crying. You could hear Jasmine screaming at the sight, her mind not registering what's going on.

You closed your eyes and wished for it to stop, for all of it to stop--

The sound of a gun clicking caught your ears and the sound of metal scratching made your head lift. Your eyes met Bo's as his shotgun aimed right at Todd. His harden blue eyes looking at him with fire, an ember that's been burning since he met you. Standing to his left, just far off, a darken figure emerged from the shadows, two knives clinching hard between his hands, his face covered by a waxed mask. You looked between them then at Jasmine, who was still crying on the couch. You tried to stand as you held your stomach, but you fell. You felt a gushing warmth between your legs, the smell of iron and bitter copper filled the air.

"Don't fuckin' touch 'er," Bo spat, his drawl heavy and laced with anger. "Touch 'at baby, I swear to God I'll kill you!"

Todd held up his hands slightly. "Let's talk--"

"Nah, we're done talkin'," Bo's voice harden as he looked at Todd. His eyes lingered over to you and his face fell; he knew he was too late. His gaze snapped back at Todd. "I'll take my time with sweet time with you, boy." He felt his heart beating in anger; he wants blood. He wants death. He wants you to get out of here. "Vincent," he snapped, his gun not moving. "Get Mama and kid outta here." He clinched his jaw as his eyes fell on Jasmine. He felt his world breaking as her little hands reached up for Vincent. "Jasmine doesn't need to see this."

Todd stood still, his hands still up. He stayed silent as he saw the dark haired man pick you up from the floor, helping you to your child.

"It's okay, sweetie," you choked out, your knees wobbling as you picked up Jasmine. "Mama's has you. You're okay... you're okay."

You felt a large hand support you as were led off to another room. It looked like a dinning room, and it looked just as dusty as the rest of the rooms. Your head was spinning as the pain from your stomach burned, blood falling. The crushing weight finally took over as you started to fall to your knees. Vincent's hands caught both you and the baby, and he lowered you to the floor. He pulled you close as your eyes became heavy. You rested Jasmine on your chest and held her. You relaxed to the sound of a gunshot from the other room.

**********

Bo stood over Todd after tying his hands together. He'll put him in the basement under the garage. It's meant for women, the chair, but he'll make an exception for him. The scum of the earth right under his boot wasn't going to crawl away that easy.

He turned his attention to the closed dinning room and hurried towards it. His head was racing for thought's of y/n and the child. He hoped Vincent got them far away--

His stomach dropped when he saw Vincent holding Jasmine, cradling her in his arms, and your head on his knees. When he looked past you, he saw your chest rising and falling out from pain and the bright red staining your pants. He felt sick to his stomach. If only he got here in time to stop it. If he didn't have to play the part of a dumb hick. If he told Vincent just to kill right as you walked through the door...

"Vincent." Bo watched Vincent's shoulder flinching upwards. He looked back to face him, and Bo's face fell. The little girl was sleeping in his arms, her face starting to return from crying. "Give me the babe. Carry y/n to the house. I need... need to call Les." He didn't know why he felt himself shake as he looked over y/n. He didn't know why there was a hole in his chest burning. He hated this. He hated Todd. He hated himself. "They need our help. They need help."

As soon as Vincent passed Jasmine to him to pick you up, Bo's heart broke. He looked between you and the baby as if he was yours, as if the child was his. His eyes fell over Jasmine as he held her close, swaying back and forth with her in his arms. Something clicked like a switch as he looked at Jasmine starting to fuss in his arms before to to sleep again. She was so small in his large arms, and he wanted nothing more than to wrap her in a blanket and lover her until the air in his chest was gone. He would kill for her. He would die for her. Either way, what bliss will he have.

He held her head close to his chest and shielded her away from Vincent as he lifted you off the ground. He was careful with your legs as he held you close. Vincent's mind circled over and over as he looked down at you. Why did he watch that long? What made him stay back to to watch it? He wanted to find an answer, any answer to satisfy his racing thoughts, but he found thing to calm his nerves. He found nothing special to make his stop to ache in his arms as he followed Bo to the house. The baby was gone, and it's fault. All his fault.

Both shared the blame as they walk you to the house in silence.

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cutemothman · 1 year

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I need to talk about Scully in season 8.

Her best friend has just been abducted and the search for him is being treated like a manhunt. Like he's a criminal. After all she's done to stick up for him, she has to watch as his name gets dragged through the mud over and over again. He's a joke to everyone. Despite the fact that he's brilliant and loyal and has the biggest heart, they still see him as a raving lunatic who's obsessed with aliens and ghosts and cryptids. It's even suggested that he staged his abduction because he knew he was dying and wanted to go out with a bang. But that's not Mulder and she knows that. She's not even put in charge of the taskforce to find him, even though she's the person who has the best chance of finding him because anyone else is going to go looking in the wrong places. They can't find him because they don't know him like she does. The power is completely wrenched away from her.

And at the exact same time Mulder goes missing, she finds out she's pregnant. At the end of Requiem, you can see all the emotions she's feeling. Fear because Mulder's gone, confusion because she thought that she was infertile, and hope. So much hope. Gillian does a fantastic job in this scene. She's crying and she's scared but you can tell she wants to be happy about this. It's what she's always wanted. To be a mother. And she knows it's Mulder's baby. And it's so fucking unfair. She got what she hoped and prayed for. After all she's been through. After discovering Emily and having to watch her die. Just as this dream comes true for her the love of her life is ripped away from her.

And she's alone. Without the person that's been by her side for 7 years. I wrote in a fic once that Scully and Mulder are like two bonded shelter cats that can't be separated. She's not used to him not being in her life. Thank god she still has Skinner who always has her back (I get super emotional thinking about how he didn't even entertain Alex's ridiculous request to take out Scully's baby in exchange for a vaccine for Mulder). And despite a rocky beginning with Doggett, he's more than proven himself to her. But none of that matters because she doesn't have Mulder. The person who understands her better than anyone. And because of all the things she's seen, everything she's been through since they first went to Bellefleur, she can't deny the existence of all the improbable things that he's has been showing her all these years. Scully loves Mulder so much that she becomes him. When she's out on cases with Doggett, she assumes the role of believer as a foil to Doggett's realism. She knows how badly Mulder was treated, but now she has to experience that firsthand. Stepping into his shoes, she has to listen to people calling her crazy just like they did to Mulder all those years.

When they find Mulder's body, Doggett literally has to drag her off of his corpse.

Beside Mulder's grave, Scully comments to Skinner how it doesn't feel real that she's standing there. They've had a lot of close calls over the years, but they've always ended up okay. No matter how scraped and bruised and bloodied they always managed to get out alive. Until one of them didn't. He was the last one, she says. His father, his mother, his sister, and now him. In a beautiful moment, Skinner points out that he wasn't the last in reference to her baby (god, I love Skinner).

It's real this time. He's really gone. No matter how much she wishes that she'll see him walk through the door of his office or hear his voice when she picks up the phone he's gone and it's real and he's not coming back.

We as the audience don't get to see what those three months were like when she believed that he was dead, but they must have been absolute hell. She has to grieve him. Knowing that their child will never meet their father. She got her miracle but at what cost? She has to think about how she can move forward. How she can pick up the pieces and continue that work that he started, because if she doesn't, then what the hell was it all even for?

Three months isn't nearly enough time to even scratch the surface of her grief but she's getting up each day and surviving. She has to. What else is she supposed to do?

And then he comes back.

Scully saw them put Mulder in the ground. She stood by his side as he was lowered. This wasn't a magic act. This wasn't a trick of the light. It wasn't a case of a 'missing presumed dead suddenly reappears' soap opera plot. He was dead and now he's not. Scully's seen a lot of shit and opened herself up to new beliefs but this is a whole new level of bizarre. How do you even begin to process the return of someone you put in the ground. People don't just come back from the dead. Aliens exist and monsters are real but people don't come back from the dead.

No one who spends three months buried alive comes out of that okay. I love how they show the change in Mulder's personality. Duchovny portrays him so well. His jokes have more bite. He's darker. There's a new kind of tension that hangs between him and Scully. So thick it's almost choking. It's palpable, especially in that scene where they go back to his apartment. They seem to be dancing around each other. He even apologizes to her for being cold. He says that he's having a hard time figuring out where he fits in. He sees Scully, heavily pregnant, with a new partner by her side living her life without him, and that must be so fucking hard for him. I think back a lot to their conversation in the motel room in Requiem. How he tells her that she has so much more she needs to do with her life. Not our lives, your life. What really strikes me is how he doesn't include himself into that equation. The white picket fence domestic life that she craves. Even though she asked him to be the father of her child, he doesn't see how he fits into that scenario. He never did, even from the beginning but he was willing to try because it's Scully and he would do anything for her. But now, he sees her doing okay without him and he super doesn't feel like he belong.

I sense a kind of hopelessness here from Scully when he comes back. She doesn't know how she can convince him that, yes you belong in my life, so a lot of things go unsaid. There's something that's so maddening but also so special about this show and things that are unspoken. The things that are left up in the air. All the things that we are left to piece together. They don't even touch on the topic of the baby's paternity right after he comes back even though you can tell it's just eating at him. I think he knows but a part of him just can't believe it. He flashes Scully a confused look when Langly makes a comment about him being the father. She doesn't tell him because he's been buried for three months and she doesn't want to pile anything else on him. She can sense that he's hurting so deeply and there isn't a whole lot that she can do about it.

So here she is. She has him back, her best friend rose from the dead. By all intents and purpose, this is a miracle. The man that she loves crawled his way from the grave and back into her life. But things are different now. He's changed and so has she. And she knows they can't ever go back to the way they were before.

#idk i did the triple whammy combo of this is not happening deadalive and three words #and god it fucked me UP #i know i've done a lot of scully posting lately but i'm deep in the trenches of season 8 and i'm in PAIN #txf #the x files #fox mulder #dana scully #text

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mutantthedark · 8 months

Text

NO ONE TO RETURN....

What if Sigma dies instead of Soap?

(Insporation of the pose credits gonto @/sleepyconfusedpotato)

Sigma gasped as her shoulder got shot by Makarov. He knocked Soap out to the ground as he and Captain Price tries to defuse the bomb, while Sigma is covering their backs. Makarov also shoots Price's shoulder, he comes up to him, putting his foot on his chest, aiming his pistol at Price's face.

"Take this to hell with you, Captain... Never bury your enemies alive..." Makarov said bluntly, until Sigma comes right behind him and stabs his shoulder with her combat knife.

Makarov grunts in pain, but he fought back. He grabs Sigma's left arm and breaks it, Price was about to get up and help, but Makarov kicks his face, throwing him on the ground again and he shots Sigma's temple, blowing her brains out. She passes out on the ground in cold blood. Soap's eyes widens in shock, And also did Price's.

Soap feels his heart shattered in thousand pieces. "NOO!!" He yelled, now seeing Sigma's dead, cold body on the ground.

Ghost and Gaz came a little too late. But arrived as quickly as they could to return the fire, "Price, Johnny, Sigma!" Ghost yelled, killing the Konni group, Makarov ran away, Price was about to stop him, but the bullet train ran right into it, losing Makarov's tracks.

"Bloody hell!" Ghost cursed.

Soap quickly runs to Sigma's lifeless body, she laid there, the blood splattered around.

"No..." Soap mutters, he carefully picked Sigma's body up, holding her in his arms, his expression turns into pain, her bright ocean blue eyes who are still open, her temple is bleeding too, he carefully brushes black bangs out of her face.

"Sigma... No...!" Soap's voice cracks into sadness, Ghost kneels down in front of them, Gaz sighs shakily. "She's gone, Captain... the bomb-- how do we stop it?"

Gaz crouches and looks at the bomb's components. Price looks at Soap who's holding Sigma in her arms, Price grits his teeth and turns into bomb.

"Alright, find the red wire. RED ONLY -- Soap said we cut it together --on "3". Copy?" Price grabbed the red wire.

"Rog. On three!" Gaz also holding the red wire, in Countdown.*

"One...Two...Three!" By that, they together cut the red wire, the beeping stopped, Price and Gaz sighed in relief, the bomb is defused. They turned their heads to Soap and Ghost, who's still examining Sigma's body, Soap is still holding her.

Price feels the pain too in his heart, Gaz has no words left out of his mouth. They lost a perfect soldier who's supporting the most dangerous situations...

Price immediately went through his comms on his vest, pushing the PTT, "All stations -this is bravo in the blind. Threat neutralized. Bomb is safe... One KIA."

Price informs it, staring at Sigma's cold body. A young, American brave ex-airwoman fought till the very end.

Soap's eyes sting in pain, then a tear fall down his cheek, he hoped Sigma would hug him back. They were close friends, they understood each other right, protecting their backs. Now she is dead, never to return.

"I'm sorry..." Soap mutters in his Scottish accent, putting his forehead against hers, he hoped it was all a nightmare, a horrible one, just a nightmare. But it's not a dream anymore, it's a cruel war, war is suicide. But the chaos is real.

They put Sigma to rest, still not ready to say goodbye, yet. Soap is not happy how it ended, the fear is running on his mind. Sigma's aunt, Lala, also fell apart, not believing her ears what she heard.

With that, the funeral began outside. The sunset is almost setting, giving beautiful red colors in the sky. Gaz, Soap, Price, and Ghost. Of course, Sigma's allies and soldiers from the Air Force academy, they also cared about her. Soap is lost in thought, with no emotions in his eyes. Sigma's aunt, Lala brought Ruby in the furenal, she runs to the coffin and puts her paws on it, the coffin is also coverd with American flag. Ruby whimpers softly in sadness, putting her paws on the ground and lays down.

With that, a young woman, who has red hair and amber eyes, puts her hand on the coffin, paying respect.

"Aim High... Fly-Fight-Win... You were one of the best, Connors... Sleep easy." She says with full in emotions, tears in her eyes.

Soap remembers something that he wouldn't never forget... Sigma promised them when the chaos is over, they'll go to the Hawaii, make a vacation to relax. Now it's no use, and he knows the chaos will never stop...

With that, he feels something inside, like Sigma is hugging him, because she is...

"Yep, I know I made my promise, but you should move on. I'm leaving everything to you. Goodbye, Johnny..."

Okay, I wrote this 2 months ago after Cod mwiii was released, again. I'm sorry for this. This is originally posted on Ao3, but I fixed a few stuff here. So yea, don't attack me... I'm not a good writer so I apologize.

#art #myart #call of duty oc #cod oc #call of duty #original character #call of duty modern warfare iii #call of duty modern warfare 3 #cod mw3 #john soap mactavish #simon ghost riley #kyle gaz garrick #john price #call of duty modern warfare 3 spoilers #Halia Sigma Connors #writting

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crookedkryptonitebeliever · 2 years

Text

Language Barrier (Yandere male x reader) p8

tw: violence, blood, afab reader, infantilization , short chapter

Minors and ageless blogs you will be blocked

hi<3 thansk for readeing, i appreciate the reblogs n comments n messages very cool and very motivation

i do have a set plotline timeline vfor this, just a little iffy on how it ends,

pls dont critizwe 2 harsh on my worldbuilding i tired my best ok </3

as allways, no proofreading <3

Happy New years !!

part 1, part 7, Part 9

masterlist

"He said it's to make sure you're always in his line of sight." Said the translator.

Now you know why 2718 always carries you on his front, never giving you a piggy back ride even though it's much easier.

You looked up to the sun. It's in the middle of the sky. You swear that the entire ordeal has taken up more than a day.

The translator is lugging her own backpack, you assumed she bought it sometime before the three of you arrived home. You asked her if she's okay.

"Yeah. Nothing I can't handle. Are you?" She asked, adjusting the heavy straps on her shoulders.

You asked, how many hours are there in a day? A day in this planet, you mean.

"They considered 30 hours a 'day'. But actually, it takes approximately five thousand and nine hundred hours for this planet to complete a whole rotation- in other words, around two hundred 'accepted days' in a 'real day'. You get me?"

What.

That doesn't explain the first five days you spent here, the sun seem to set and rise at regular intervals!

"Sunlight hours here are fucked up. You just got lucky. During your three-day coma, I even saw the sun flicker. Sometimes, the sun would just disappear for a few 'days' and come back, at full brightness for a week straight."

You asked her why that happened, the translator trailed behind 2718. You rested your chin on his shoulder.

"You can rent the sun. Literally. Farmers would pay for more sunlight, nocturnal inhabitants would turn it off, corrupt business owners would manipulate it to get a higher profit, spoiled rich kids would mess around with everyone's day for fun, Oligarchs get to have longer ass-kissing dinners, normal citizens would pool money to maintain the regularity... if you have the resources, you get to play god for a while."

You asked how was that possible.

"They claimed it's controlled by magic. But I think that's bull, they must have some massive, planetary-scaled machine that made this possible- The ball of fire up there must be an artificial sun. My reality is no stranger to artificial celestial bodies, we even make our own stars too. But we use science, not some childish, made up idea." She grumbled.

Who are "they"?

"The guy your friend offed for shoving glass in your throat."

The reminder of the disgraced citizen made your blood run cold.

"Listen, he's going to be fine. In fact, you probably did him a favor."

Exasperated, you asked how was that a favor.

2718, sensing your distress, whipped around and pointed his dagger at the translator. Thinking that she was either insulting you or scaring you.

She raised her hands up and backed away, reasoning with him.

You pressed your hand against his face, gently pushing him to the direction you want him to go. He begrudgingly back turned around, letting you face the translator again. His hold on you became firmer, though.

"Trust me, I know he went out... with a bang. But he's going to be just fine."

You don't think that he is going to be 'just fine' and you can't believe that she is this apathetic. However, you decided to drop the topic for now.

"I didn't get all my knowledge of this place from that one guy, though. Most of it came from my associates living here."

You asked why she didn't contact them for help.

"I'm trying to. But it's tough when I can't go 'online' through myself. I need an external vessel, like a computer- or a smartphone, perhaps."

You asked why she didn't use the coins to buy a cheap burner phone or it's equivalent, assuming they exist.

"I'm 'offline', off grid, even. I effectively lost all my contacts... maybe even a whole chunk of my memory- I don't know, I won't know until I reconnect myself to the galactic internet again. I wouldn't know who's ID to call anyways. Might as well use it to buy stuff necessary for me to live another day."

You went onto ask what the name of this planet is and how many planets are there in this solar system.

"In English? I'm sure you can guess."

You really can't. The properties of this planet sounds... familiar. But yet, so foreign.

"I'll give you another hint. This planet spins backwards. Well, used to."

Huh?

"We're in Venus. Venus with major tweaks done to it."

Venus!? Your jaw went slack, this piece of information blew your mind. You can't believe you're in Venus! Absolute insanity, is the translator sure that this isn't actually Earth? But in an alternate universe?

"Yeah. Earth is used as a landfill now. It's still populated though. Mainly by kind volunteers and the... less-than-fortunates. It's a big mess, mind you. We aren't using tiny terms like 'international' anymore. It's Interplanetary and beyond. So the social systems and all that junk are way more complex."

You asked, what IS this solar system?! The past? The future? The present?

"It's convict central, baby!" She sarcastically waved her hands in glee. "It's prison. But worse." She deadpanned. "Because everyone is free. The strongest gets to call shots around here."

"But if you're talking about the solar system before it became a dumping ground for thugs, it's just some poor, alternate timeline where Earth is a budding Type 1 civilization. They stood no chance against Type fives."

You asked what civilization is... 'Convict Central' under.

"Type two, on their way to becoming a type three. Again, the people here claim to 'generate' their own energy through magic. Take their precious Dyson Spheres away and let's see if their whimsical magical hero powers can feed trillions every day."

You quietly noted her disdain on the matter and said nothing about it.

You went onto ask her about clocks, watches or any tool that tells the time. It seems to be nonexistent here.

She snorted.

You asked her what was so funny.

"Let's see, you're considered partially deaf, partially blind, partially mute.... and temporally disabled. I'm glad your friend got you first before anyone else."

Temporally disabled? You asked her to clarify.

"I have a chronometer installed in me, and that's understandable because I'm part metal. Your friend, has one too. But he evolved to have it, and it's damn accurate too. Down to the nanosecond."

She wiped the sweat off her forehead. It made you realize that you're not sweating, because it's comfortably cool. 2718 must be cooling you down.

"The inconsistent sunlight, the gravity, the atmosphere, the stress and generally everything else got my chronometer a little fucked up. As for your friend? You can drop him at the edge of Andromeda and he will calibrate himself immediately. He will know what time it is-- hell, it's damn impressive to even perceive time at that point!"

You brought your hands to your head, upset that you didn't get a chance to experience a world never seen before. And you never will, you're just not evolved enough to grasp it.

"Hmm. Okay makes sense... That makes sense." She mumbled to herself, scratching her chin.

You asked her what made sense.

"He could easily bring you home in a blink, if he had a glass teleporter with him. But seeing that you're still a... primate, he knows that it might screw something up in you."

That explains why you vomited after appearing at the market.

"Yep. That sounds like spatial-temporal sickness alright. Keep that up and it might cause a brain hemorrhage."

Your eyes widened in horror. Absolutely terrifying news, you're grateful that the only side effect was devastating nausea.

You shuddered, creeped out by so many things. That made 2718 stop in his tracks again, glaring at the translator from the corner of his eyes.

The translator defended herself with a whine, swearing that she didn't do anything to you.

You were curious as to why 2718 set you down.

"He's taking a water break." Explained the translator. She took out her own water bottle from her bag.

Your companion softly nudged your arm with the waterskin. You twisted your head and picked it off his hand. He patted your head.

You looked into the distance. It's still a long way to go, you huffed. You felt very demotivated, you really don't want to sit through this entire journey.

Maybe 2718 felt your demoralization too, or the translator told him in a frequency that you cannot hear, but he cupped your cheeks and stared into your eyes.

He gently squished your cheeks, forcing you to pucker a bit, before letting go. The man then pressed a loving kiss onto your forehead. You closed your eyes when he affectionately nuzzled his nose against yours.

"He's said that it's going to be okay. You're doing well and he loves you." Your eyes shifted to the woman.

This translation cause 2718 to growl at the translator for ruining the moment. He shielded you in his arms as he barked insults at her. She argued back, this time annoyance was apparent in her tone and face.

You asked if 2718 actually understands you.

"Not really. But I bet anyone would look at that-" She pointed at his house in the distance. It looked like an ant from here. "-And go 'aaaugghhh... still a long way to go...' I know, I do. He's trying to cheer you up, that's all. You had a sad face on anyways."

You leaned into 2718, tiredly resting against him as he drank some from the waterskin. You don't know why you're so exhausted. It's not like you did most of the walking.

"You have been awake for 35 hours, of course you're going to feel like shit. You're accustomed to 12 hours of daylight and 12 hours of darkness. Today someone rented out the sun and left it on longer than I liked. You better thank them, though. Dealing with creatures of the night is no easy feat."

You groan, has it really been that long? You told her to ask him; how long did it take for him to recover from his injuries earlier.

2718 uttered something to her.

"He said six hours, 27 minutes, 13.0348... Okay, I'll just round it off to the nearest second. 6 hours, 27 minutes and 13 seconds. The fight with the insect took thirteen minutes- around thirteen minutes, he's giving me a twelve digit number and I'm not saying all that."

Assuming the three of you spent half an hour at the lighthouse, that means... the journey from the house to the translator's base took around 28 hours and 20 minutes. You're way behind your sleep schedule, you're going to get eyebags!

But, how does she know that you're awake for 35 hours?

"Your friend told me. Oh yeah, he actually told me to tell you this earlier, so you would... you know, be comfortable sleeping. In his arms. Sorry. I forgot. And I'd be lonely without you talking to me, so..."

You guess you can see why he doesn't trust her to translate his words. You also wonder what else is she omitting from you for her own benefit. You would have forced yourself to stay awake anyways for her sake, she didn't need to lie or 'forget'.

You're giving her the benefit of the doubt. Maybe the language is just too complex to catch everything in one breath. Nevertheless, it does disturb you that the translator could easily manipulate the situation to her favor if she wanted to- by giving false translations.

2718 probably won't buy into her tricks as much. But you know you would, because she's the only one you could understand. And you have no choice but to rely on her.

It made you question if the words she said that made him hostile were congruent to what she tells you.

All these thinking are giving you a headache. You don't want to talk to her for now.

You told her that you're going to sleep for the next... however many hours it takes to walk back. She's disappointed, but she understands.

2718 lifted you up by the arms and lets you sag onto his shoulder. His cold hands, spreading harmless frost all over the fabric of your clothes. Chilling you under the scorching sun.

You let your eyelids droop, slowly giving into the sweet embrace of sleep-

"What the fuck happened here?" You lifted your head at her remark.

This earned a yell from 2718, not at you, at the translator. He must be angry at her for waking you up.

You're more concerned about the matter that made her say that. So you rubbed your eyes before looking around.

Oh. After realizing that you're still on... Venus, and not in some sort of blood-painted, tropophobia-inducing hellscape, you relaxed. Actually, it was extremely bizarre to think about it. Venus, a planet known for it's inhabitable conditions, and you're in it? Alive? And not burnt to bits?

You explained that the epic battle between your companion and the insect took place here. He bled out profusely from his leg and eyes.

You lolled back onto him, adjusting your hat so that the sun doesn't touch your eyes.

You heard the translator grumbled something under her breath. 2718 didn't respond, at least not in a way you can perceive.

His rhythmic trudging lulled you deeper and deeper into slumber.

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jqmalikhsgib · 5 months

Text

beauty and the freak

four

you wake up early on saturday morning due to a loud banging on your front door. you had hope someone would be home to see who it was, but as time went by you assumed everyone was either asleep or they’ve been gone.

you groaned before moving eddie’s hand off of you and getting out of bed. you looked over at your boyfriend and roll your eyes. eddie could sleep through the end of the world. you head downstairs before opening the door and immediately wanting to slam it.

there stood your bitch of a mother with some dessert you’re sure she bought from the grocery store.

“it’s too early for you to be here and bother everyone. kindly go away!”

“now is that a way to speak to a neighbor? let alone your mother? and what are you wearing? what have i told you about looking your best at all times. even when you’re asleep!”

“sorry mother! we don’t all sleep in coffins. what are you doing here?”

“i came to greet my new neighbors. is that so wrong?”

“when it’s you? absolutely! dads not here and neither is his wife.”

your mother shrugs her shoulders. she gently pushes you aside and invites herself into your home. closing the door, you turned and rolled your eyes. “oh, sure! just come right in, mother.”

your mom looks around the place and hums. “quite cute.”

“seriously, what do you want?”

“like i said, i came to visit my daughter and ex husband.”

“i don’t wanna see you!”

your mother turns around. she gently grabs your hand and shakes her head. “when’s the last time you got this done?”

“why does it matter?”

“i just want what’s best for you darling.”

you groan as you head to the kitchen, grab a cup, thanking your father for making coffee before he left. your mother follows behind you.

“why don’t you come live with me and my fiancée?”

“since when have you been engaged?”

your mother shrugs her shoulders. “he asked me two weeks ago. you’d know that if you’d bother to text your mother back!”

“who was knocking on the door? oh. hi.” steve looks at you and you shrug your shoulders.

“steven.”

steve simply ignores her. he knew she didn’t like him much because his mom married her ex husband. but that wasn’t his problem.

“ed, here?” steve asked you.

you nod your head. “he’s sleep.”

“as always! the man is a menace.”

“im sorry, ed? who is ed?”

“eddie, mom!”

“as in munson? you don’t seriously have him in your house?! you do know his dad is a criminal right?! does your father know about him being here?” she turns to steve. “does your mom?!”

both you and steve laugh. “yeah! eddie’s my best friend. of course they know!”

“how could you associate yourself with someone like that steven?!”

steve looks at you as if your mom has been living under a rock. in this town, everyone knows everybody’s business. and despite your mom being your typical overbearing, condescending, arrogant woman, she minded her own business—besides yours and your dad’s business—

you weren’t surprised she didn’t know about eddie and steve. and you weren’t surprised that she didn’t know about you and eddie. this only made you smirk.

knowing this would just piss her off and possibly get her out of your life—but knowing her this would only make her control your life even more—you take a sip of your coffee before hearing footsteps.

“morning, man!” eddie yawns. he didn’t notice your mom, yet. instead he walks over to you and smiles. “how’d you sleep, baby?” eddie wraps his arms around your waist.

“i slept amazing. love cuddling you.”

“yeah? what else you love, hmm?” eddie kisses your neck.

you gently giggle. “ed, steve’s right there.”

“oh, please! i know you two are freaks! the walls between my room and yours are pretty thin, sister.” steve nudged you.

you blush.

“um—excuse me?! what the hell is going on?”

you honestly forgot about your mother. but now you were happy she’d been here. eddie’s perfect in your eyes! no one could tell you otherwise. and you’d never use eddie, not for anything! but knowing that your mom didn’t like him made you love eddie even more—if that’s even possible—

eddie looks at you and noticed your smirk. he smirks back knowing exactly what you were thinking.

“hi, miss yln! how are you?”

your mom looks at eddie up and down as if he was trash. eddie’s use to the looks. it doesn’t bother him a bit.

though it did bother you! she couldn’t judge anyone. she’s a manipulative serial cheater!

“get your hands off my daughter!”

“mom! he’s my boyfriend. stop being rude!” you roll your eyes.

“boyfriend?! you can’t be serious, yn ymn yln?”

“i am! we’ve been dating for a year and a half. how have you not known this?!”

your mom stares at you as if you had two heads. “you barely talk to me! and you know i don’t gossip. how could you be dating this—this—”

“freak? trailer trash? criminal child? cult leader? satanist? ive heard it all misses yln. doesn’t even hurt. bottom line, im in love with your daughter. im gonna marry her someday, rather you like or not. make her a munson and have millions of munson babies! gonna take her on the road with me when my band and i make it big! gonna prove you and this hick ass town just how wrong they are. i would love if you’d accept my relationship with her, but it ain’t gonna change shit if you don’t.” eddie shrugs his shoulder and walked away. you looked at him with so much love it almost pained you.

eddie truly is the perfect man!

“yn, we need to talk about this!”

yn shrugs her shoulders. “you heard him. get in line or get the fuck out. actually, just get the fuck out!” you walked away from your mother as steve grabs and apple, smirks, and takes a bit of it.

“you told her, sissy!”

taglist:

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#jqhotchner #jqhotchner masterlist #eddie munson x fem!reader #eddie munson x black!reader #eddie munson x reader #eddie stranger things #eddie munson x reader fluff #eddie munson x yn #eddie munson x reader smut #eddie munson x you #eddie munson x fem reader #eddie munson #eddie munson x female reader #beauty and the freak jqhotchner

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snowblossomreads · 5 months

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All Because of A Hat

Summary: [Y/n] attempts to sew a hat for her husband Elliott and finds that it isn't as simple as she would hope

A/N: LOLOL AND IN A FIC THAT WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO BE HERE WE ARE. This is dedicated to my bestie the lovely and wonderful @smilingformoney and is based on the happy ending AU for The Eternal Summer (right here!) I hope this will make you feel better :) and I hope you know how much I love you to have banged out a fic this quickly (A day and a half innit?)

It had been almost a year since Elliott had first laid eyes on [Y/n] before he made plans to marry her and whisk her back to Australia with him. Only if she would have him course! She had already been forced to do so many things in her life unfit for such a sweet woman, and he for one, would make sure she would only do what she wanted from now on.

Luckily for him, she was more than willing to go along with the crazy idea as she had fallen head over heels for the gun slinging pastoralist. Funnily enough, he had only come to make sure that she wouldn't end up homeless after her husband, his cousin, William passed away.

To say getting acclimated to the weather in Australia was difficult was an understatement, but she had managed, and managed well. Learning how to sew more lighter dresses and skirts so that she could keep the sand away, but also ward against sun poisoning. Something she had gotten familiar with once, and did not fancy experiencing again.

Bonnets were also a must in that department, and she had become quite skilled in making those as she would also make some of the ladies that would come to the station. But there was one thing she hadn't tried yet surprisingly enough, and with their anniversary on the horizon, she wanted to try her hand at it.

"Excuse me sir?" [Y/n] called out as she went up to the shop keeper of the local tanning store.

Elliott and she had made a trip into town with the others for more provisions, and she had asked to come within the guise of getting more things for her sewing project. It wasn't really a lie, as this was for a sewing project, but she didn't want to let him know what she was up to.

He had a keen sense for when she was up to something, because not only was he a sharp shooter, but he had a sharp mind as well, and sneaking anything under his nose was almost impossible. Thankfully though, he didn't ask too much, only saying that he was coming with just in case he needed to protect her from wild dingoes or the stray kangaroo.

"Would you happen to have material suitable for hat making? I was wanting to try my hand making some and thought this a good place to start for some materials."

The shop keeper, an old plump and friendly looking man with a large mustache, beamed brightly at her before starting,"Well hello there if it isn't Mrs.Marston!" His voice booming, but kind as he addressed her. "Why I think we just had a batch of leather finish tanning. Though you know, the shops over here sell some fine hats as well, why don't you also check on them?"

"Oh well thank you for the suggestion, but you see, this one is to be a gift for my husband. And I wanted to make it special," she smiled, already thinking about Elliott's reaction when she gave it to him.

"Of course of course, any particular color you looking for?"

Taking a moment, she thought about the dark blonde of his hair, and the hazel eyes of her Elliott along with what color would probably keep him cool before coming to an answer.

"Would you happen to have something in maybe a brown? Maybe a lighter shade?"

"I can certainly take a look! Give me one moment!"

Hobbling off to the back of the shop and leaving her to wait for him, it only took a few minutes before the man returned with three beautiful pieces of leather. Each no doubt could make a fine hat for her husband, but if she bought too much, he be on to her and probably figure out what she was doing. And that would absolutely ruin the surprise.

"Now this tan one right here, we just got in from Sydney and it's been quite popular for some of the hat makers out there I've heard," the man explained. "This natural sand looking one is a little different but if different is what you're looking for I think it go a long way! But," pushing the others aside and placing the third one in front he continued, "this one I think has a nice balance of color. It's a bit costly now but it'll make for a great hat! It will also go with just about anything I think!"

Eyes jumping from each of the samples he showed her, she quickly thought about how each color would look on Elliott and what other color hats he had. He didn't really have many others truth be told, and they were all a shade of black or gray. A little color wouldn't hurt, would it? Making her mind up she pointed to the last one.

"I think the hazelnut one will be just lovely! Could I get about one yard of it if you have that much to spare?" She asked as she began to rummage in her purse for payment.

"Of course! I'll get that for you right away."

Cleaning off the counter of the samples, the owner cut the fabric for [Y/n] who promptly paid for it and thanked him as he wished her the best in her hat making adventure.

Hiding the fabric was a bit harder than acquiring it, as it was difficult to try and shove it somewhere where it wouldn't be seen, considering how bulky it was. So while making sure no one was looking, she quickly scrambled to the wagon, and hid it under some crates that were full of supplies they had been bought. Once she was sure no one would snoop under it, she rejoined Elliott who was at the general goods store.

"Elliott!" She called enthusiastically once she spotted him.

Her voice had him turning to meet her bright smile as she approached, and he couldn't help the smile that grew on his face as she found herself beside him.

"There's my little kola bear," he teased giving her a brief kiss on the lips before he hugged her close. "Find everything you needed?"

"I did!" She beamed, looking up at him with eyes of adoration that made him mush. "There was a wonderful sale on some of the fabrics that I use to patch the boys' clothes up," she explained, as Elliott wrapped his arm around her waist and led them around to the other side of the aisle. "You know with how many of them there are, I might need to teach them how to sew one day."

That got a healthy chuckle out of him.

"Teach them how to sew? Ha! You may be a natural with a gun sweetheart, but I don't think any of my boys will be any good with a needle. Hardly any good with a gun sometimes!"

"Even if they aren't, that's okay, you don't have to be the best sharpshooter in Australia to be any good at sewing," she teased, garnering a smirk from him. "Patience is all you need, and I think I have plenty of that. Wouldn't you say so?"

"To deal with me? I say you have the patience of a saint."

Well, that wasn't very true now as she felt the sharp point of the needle prick her finger for the tenth time. This time it drawing blood from the poor abused digit, and drawing a sharp painful cry of,

"Ouch!!" From her lips, as she dropped the brim of the hat, causing the crown to fall right off of it as the whole thing tumbled on the ground.

To say she had been struggling all day to get the brim attached to the crown was an understatement. She had first started by making little holes in the brim and crown so that they would line up and she could sew the thread into them to connect the two pieces.

With how thick the material was, she had to use a bigger needle to pierce the fabric, and even still, it was a nightmare to get the string in because she didn't want the guiding holes to be too large. That had taken up multiple hours, and ended up with her poking herself a couple of times, as her thimble decided to fall off at the worst times.

"Bloody stupid hat!" She hissed, in an attempt to calm the raging amount of emotions that swirled in her chest. Most of them being disappointment, as she swiped at her face to keep from crying. "Why did I ever think this was a good idea? Of course the first one is bound to turn out terrible but my lord this is ridiculous! I-."

The sound of heavy footsteps caused her to stop mid rant as she waited for them to pass by, not wanting anyone to know about her secret project, lest they tell Elliott. It came closer, and closer, until it stopped right in front of the door, and a puzzled look found its way onto her face.

"[Y/n]? Are you alright in there?" The unmistakable worried voice of her husband drifted into the room from behind the door, and her heart leaped in her chest at the sound. "Heard you shouting and I came hurrying to make sure you were alright. Can I come in?"

Scrambling to hide the hat in making, even though it looked nothing like a hat at the moment, she had just shoved the bits beneath some fabric scraps she had been using to patch up some clothes before the door cracked open, and Elliott peeked his head inside.

"Yes, I'm okay! Come in!" She panted, as she dabbed her forehead, which had become damp with sweat from her rushed movements. "My thimble fell loose when I was trying to finish something and it pricked me a bit. Gave me a bit of a surprise," she explained as the door opened fully to reveal Elliott, who strode in with a look of concern etched on his features.

The little crease between his forehead deepened when she had said that she hurt herself, and she could have sworn he quickened his pace across the room to her.

"Here let me take a look at that," he said, as he took her hand to examine the wound with great care. "Now I told you I would shoot anyone who ever tried to hurt you but." Taking the hurt digit to his lips, Elliott kissed the wounded finger, his mustache brushing against her, and making her laugh at how he tickled her.

"What is a man supposed to do when you go and hurt yourself?"

A delighted giggle left her lips again as he kissed the injured digit once more, before he made his way to her lips to give it a quick peck.

"Maybe you could help me find some gauze or something to wrap it up," she suggested playfully. "And probably some cream for it as well?"

"I think that's a mighty fine idea. Now you stay right here, I have something just for that little scratch," he said, before he let her hand go and hurried out of the room.

It only took a few short moments for him to return. A triumphant smirk on his face as he strode towards her, chest puffed out looking mighty pleased with himself. Quite the stance for someone just looking for some fabric and cream.

"Here it is!" He announced proudly as he showed her the little jar and gauze he had procured.

The latter she recognized, of course, the first, not so much. It looked like some face cream the ladies at the general store would sell or some sun cream. However, this didn't seem to be any of that at all. Or well she hoped not as it wouldn't do much for her cut.

"What is it?" She asked curiously as she watched him place the fabric on the table before he opened the jar.

"Oh nothing special, just something I made for myself. Noticed a while back that all this heat and working with the livestock had my hands blistering something fierce," he explained as he scooped a bit of the substance out of the jar. "And decided to whip something up, here let me see that darling."

Allowing him to take her hand back in his again, he gently blotted her injury with the cream causing her to sigh at the nice cooling sensation of it.

"Feels a lot better doesn't it?" He asked, as he continued to massage the substance into her skin causing her to sigh in relief. Not only from the ebbing of the pain but how nice it felt to have his fingers massaging her hand that she hadn't realized had been aching. "Heard from the doctors that it's good to keep the wounds moist while they heal. Keep the dirt out and makes 'em mend faster."

"Mmm and you made this all by yourself?" She asked dreamily, enjoying watching his larger hand engulf her smaller ones as he worked the cream into her skin.

"I sure did, some honey, a bit of water, and some oils and that's really all," he said as he let go of her hand, causing her to let out a disappointed sigh. "Here let's get this gauze wrapped around it as well."

Closing the jar up and setting it aside, he grabbed the fabric he had sat on the table and wrapped her finger with the soft cotton. He made sure to wrap it just so that it wasn't too tight and that she could continue to work without any hindrance. A tailor's tool was their hands of course.

"Wow! Not only is my husband the greatest sharpshooter in all of Australia, but he can make jellies and creams as well," she praised as she took a look at the bandaged finger and wiggled it to make sure it wasn't too tight. "What other secrets are you hiding under that hat of yours, Mr.Marston?"

"What other than those two?" He started with a tip of his hat and a grin. "Well other than those two, I guess it would be how if I had to choose between being the best sharpshooter in Australia and being your husband. I would pick you every single time."

Her cheeks flushed at his comment, and her head fell to hide her bashfulness at his statement and Elliott couldn't help but chuckle at how cute she was.

"I said secrets, not something everyone in Australia knows," she laughed as she gently swatted his chest causing him to join in on the laughter. "For the record, I would choose you every time as well," she admitted as she wrapped her arms around his waist and looked up at him as a warm smile greeted her. "Thank you very much for taking care of my finger darling. You did very well and I'm sure it will heal up just nicely with that secret cream of yours."

"Of course, it's my responsibility to make sure my sweet kola is safe. Furthermore." A roguish smirk appeared on his lips as he leaned down and bumped her nose with his. "I wouldn't want any other man to put his cream on you, that's solely my job."

Pulling away quickly from him, he chuckled seeing her slack jaw, and wide eyes at the little innuendo he had let slip.

"Elliott!" She shouted, about to reprimand him but was shut down completely as he took the chance to pepper her face and neck with playful kisses.

Her shoulders shook with laughter at how his mustache tickled her, and she wiggled in his hold, only for him to hold her tighter as he rubbed his mustache over her face as he kissed her. By the time he had finished, they were both a laughing mess, and she had somehow knocked his hat over during the whole ordeal.

Untangling their arms from one another, [Y/n] picked up the hat, dusting off invisible dirt from it before offering back up to her husband. Who graciously accepted it with a thank you.

"Now as much as I enjoyed that, don't you have some work to be doing out there? If you're not careful, the boys will come looking for you."

"Let them come looking, all they'll see is a man loving his on his wife," he announced proudly causing her to once again feel a bit flushed. "I would say that they could handle things fine without me, but lord knows that would be a lie."

"Oh they aren't that bad El. Coogan's really quite brilliant with the sheep you know. They follow him around like he's their pa! It's really quite a sight actually," she giggled to herself as she remembered how the fuzzy animal would immediately gather around the tall man when he went to tend to them.

"Even so, they have a lot to learn those boys and it is my job to teach them. Even if some of them need a more heavy handed approach."

"Still, do not be too hard on them, some of them are only still boys," she spoke gently as she went to straighten his vest and smile at him causing him to soften. "I'll be here if you need me my love, working away as usual."

Not one to argue with [Y/n], he acquiesced with a nod.

"Hopefully with no more injuries? Though I don't mind coming back in to rub some cream on you and bandage you up."

"I will endeavor to make sure I stay injury free as long as possible." She laughed, shaking her head at his antics.

Grinning at her, he leaned down to give her one last kiss. This one, more passionate than the others as he let out a little groan when he felt her hands reach for the nape of his neck. Sighing against his lips when he pulled away, [Y/n] leaned up and gave him one more kiss before he was back off to tend to his men and whatever else he had been up to.

Watching him retreat, she cupped her cheeks with both hands, before scrunching her shoulders together and wiggling. God did she love him. He was everything to her, and she be remiss to let something as small as being pricked by needles stop her from finishing his hat.

She had been pricked a many of times as an apprentice and many times afterward! But never did she stop, even if it was out of necessity at times. Still though, she was going to get this hat finished one way or another. And it was going to be brilliant just like her husband who deserved it!

With a renewed spirit and a bandaged finger, she went back and unearthed the pieces of the hat she had been working on. Determined to finish it as soon as possible.

"Elliott are you busy at the moment," [Y/n] asked as she peeked her head into his office where he was sitting at the desk.

A pipe in one hand and his head lowered as he reviewed some ledgers that were spread out across the surface, he seemed deep in thought. Though at the sound of her voice, his head popped up and when he saw her, a smile grew on his face.

"Never too busy for you my little kola," he responded, going to put out his pipe, as she had once pointed out how the smell of tobacco made her feel unwell. "What do I owe this lovely surprise from my equally lovely wife to?"

"Oh stop it," she giggled as walked in, her hands behind her back as she hid the wrapped gift from sight. "I think I'm more of a distraction than anything."

His burrows furrowed together at that, and a little frown appeared on his lips. "Of course you're not! And even if you were a distraction, you're an absolutely beautiful one, I be an absolute idiot to complain," he huffed as he stood up from behind the desk and stretched his limbs that had begun to ache just before she had come.

Watching how the white button up he donned lifted and showed a bit of his stomach, and the sparse hair around his tummy, [Y/n] couldn't help but bite her bottom lip. God just the slight show of his skin had her warm in more places than one and it drove her crazy. But no no! She had a mission, and she wasn't going to get distracted because of how handsome he was. Granted that truly wasn't up to her.

"Now tell me sweetheart what do I owe the pleasure of you gracing me with your wondrous presence," he teased coming out from around his desk to stand in front of her. Though not without first giving her an affectionate kiss on the forehead that she accepted happily.

"And what's that you got hiding behind your back?" He inquired as he peered around her, trying to see what she was holding, only for her to turn in the opposite direction so he couldn't see it.

"Oh well it's just…" Her words trailed off as she averted her eyes from his gaze feigning interest in the dust on the wooden floorboards.

His gaze was so intense yet so gentle as it stayed on her, making her feel safe and loved which was all she had ever wanted in life. It warmed her heart, yet made her even more nervous about the gift which wasn't quite perfect, but she hoped he would love it still, as she had put all her love into it.

"[Y/n]?"

"I don't know if you recall, but it was around this time when you came to London and swept me away from that place that only held memories of hurt and misery," she started, meeting his soft gaze that was squarely focused on her as he listened. "And being with you, being married to you, it's been absolutely wonderful! You've shown me so many things. Things I never thought I would be able to see in my life. A-and I just wanted to make you something so that I could show you how much I love you because you always show me how much you do. It's something you could use every day so that even if you're away in town or something a bit of me will be with you."

Pausing, in her little speech, as her fingers played nervously with the item, still unsure about it, she took a deep breath to steel her nerves.

"So I made you this," she finished as she presented the carefully wrapped hat to Elliott whose eyes lit up with surprise at the sudden gift. "It's not much, and by no means is it perfect but I still hope you'll find some use for it."

Eyes flicking up from the sudden gift to her face and back down again, Elliott took the package from her with such care, that you would have thought he had never received a gift before with the way he held it. Still in shock from the surprise, he looked at [Y/n] with a dumbfounded expression.

"For me?" He asked.

She had to keep the laughter that was bubbling in her throat at the disbelief on his face. It wasn't as if this was the first time she had given him something. On the contrary, she had made him some handkerchiefs before with his initials embroidered in them. A bit of a nightmare those things were but they didn't compare to the sweat and literal blood she put into the hat.

"Of course for you my love! Who else would it be for? Go on open it or I think the anticipation may kill me before then."

Still a bit unsure about it, he did as she asked him, as his curiosity was already getting ahead of him. With

"Well I'll be," he murmured once he undid the wrapping. Admiring the hat with awe and looking at the fine detail of it as she continued her little rambles.

"I wanted to make you something useful." She replied shyly as she watched him stroke the brim of the hat, before turning it down to look at the inside of it. Oh how she loved the way he would always take interest in the things she made, another reason she wanted it to be perfect for him."I noticed that you only have black or gray hats, and I think they are all lovely, but I wanted you to have something different. Light colors help keep a person cooler and you're always working so hard outside."

"My god [Y/n] this is beautiful! Don't tell me this is the first one you've ever made because it's damn near perfect!"

Blushing at the unexpected praise, knowing this was not her best work she nodded her head yes, "it is, and it's not really that great, I think the crown may be a bit out of line if you look real close. I-I can make you another one to it's just-."

Whatever else she was going to say was swiftly cut off when she felt his arms wrap around her before he picked her up and kissed her. Her arms found their way around his neck to steady herself, and she could only moan in delight as he devoured her lips with a passion that she hadn't expected. All because of a hat.

But it was more than that of course.

"El," [Y/n] sighed breathlessly as he kissed her over and over as she stroked his cheek before tangling her fingers into his hair.

"You drive me wild do you know that," he groaned out as he pulled away from her, his cheeks flushed and his eyes alight.

"As if the Outback hasn't driven you that way already," she teased kissing his nose and shyly smiling as his sonorous chuckle tickled her ears pleasantly.

Letting her go, Elliott placed the hat on his head and secured it with the cord that hung from it while she straightened her dress as it was all ruffled up.

"How do I look?" He asked, which caused her to look up, and be captivated at the sight of him wearing something she had painstakingly put so much effort into.

"Devilishly handsome," she announced, once she was able to get over her awe. But not before she clapped her hands and pressed them against her lips, admiring how the color of his hair and eyes paired well with the hazelnut color of the hat. "Maybe you could model hats for me if I decided to make more?"

"A gentleman would never say no to a request like that from his wife," he said tipping the hat towards her and causing her to laugh. "But only on one condition."

"And what's that?"

"That I get a new hat every once in a while from you of course."

Even though she knew she would never say no to him, she placed her finger on her chin as if she was thinking. Only a moment passed before she snapped her digits together and held her hand out to him, signaling him that she would shake on it.

"You have yourself a deal Mr.Cowboy!"

A deep chuckle rumbled in his chest as he took her hand and shook on the deal. But once done he didn't let go, only to have [Y/n] squeal in delight as he once again pulled her close to him and laid his chin atop her head.

Slowly they rocked side to side, enjoying each other's company, while the sounds of the Outback began to increase in volume as dusk began to set itself up in the sky.

"Lovely you know," he muttered, burying his face into her hair, inhaling the scent that was distinctly hers which comforted him in a way nothing else could.

"Hmm? The hat?" She guessed, not really thinking about anything else as she basked in his arms and his presence.

"Yes the hat is very lovely. But," he paused, as he pulled away from her just to be able to look at her. "I mean you sweetheart. There's nothing else on this earth that could compare to how sweet and lovely you are [Y/n]. Nothing that could shine as bright as you either, you know that."

"Oh El stop it," she said going to swat his chest with a sheepish look. "It's not nice to tease a lady you know."

It was infuriating how shy he could make her feel. Even with them having been husband and wife for a year already, she was still not acclimated to how freely he complimented her. All of it was full of sincerity and love that had been so scarce in her life. And now that she had so much of it, she didn't know what to do with it other than be overwhelmed with happiness.

"But it's the truth, you're absolutely lovely my little kola, special in every way."

Lifting her head up, she started at Elliott. A smile on his thin lips as he looked at her, and even though something inside her wanted to protest about how sweet he was. She tampered it down, as she could never doubt his words. So instead she went and cupped his cheek with her hand, and lifted herself up just a little so that she could give him a little kiss on the nose, before going to peck his lips.

"I do so love you Elliott." She sighed against his lips.

"And I love you as well."

"Mmm, more than you love your guns?"

"Don't joke darling of course I love you more," he laughed as he placed his hand back around her waist.

"I only wanted to make sure," she said before joining in his laughter.

Their shoulders shook as they carried on laughing with one another, and it felt so good. It went on for a little while longer before their voice lowered as they gathered themselves. But before letting her go, a thought appeared in Elliott's brain that caused a smirk to appear on his features.

"That reminds me," he purred as he leaned near her ear causing a familiar shiver to run down her spine.

Oh?

"You've given me a gift yet I'm leaving you empty handed. Now that innit husbandly like of me is it?"

"Well, truthfully I wasn't going to say anything considering you give me all I could ever want," she said sincerely as she saw the shine in his eyes. The one he would get when he was feeling particularly mischievous. "But who am I to deny my husband wanting to gift me something."

The smirk on his face grew even wider as he grabbed her hand, pulled her close, and gave her a rather passionate kiss. His tongue traced her bottom lip and she barely had a chance to give him entrance before he was eagerly exploring her waiting mouth.

Squealing in pleasure she let him lead the kiss and then let out an equally delighted laugh as he pulled away from her. Both of them were breathless but excited as he grabbed her wrist and pulled them in the direction of their bedroom. She knew she was in for a long night with her Elliott. All of it because of a hat.

Maybe she would make them more often if the gift she received back was this.

#elliott marston x reader #elliott marston #alan rickman #fanfic of a fanfichaha #blossom writes

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