#she put down playing the piano but still enjoys gardening and has a few plants that are easy to take care of in her room

[amelia-yap]

haha therapy AU

[immabethehero]

Chase’s Bday Present Pt 1

Runs in holding a latte *wheeze...* I’m here! And I have three presents for Chase because I’m indecisive as hell! So! Here is the first birthday present, a sweet little ditty I wrote!

CW: talk of food, slight body horror and stitches mention (Robbie), and Soft Anti

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Septic house was in disarray. Jameson Jackson frantically polished the stairway and furniture until it sparkled, Marvin the Magnificent washed the dishes while Jackieboy Man dried them, and Antisepticeye cleaned up the living room seats. All the while, Dr. Henrik von Schneeplestein, MD, PhD, MVP, FFS, loomed over all of them, barking orders while cleaning the floors. Robbie the zombie was the only one not under Schneep’s scrutiny, having wisely taken shelter in the laundry room, folding clothes and ironing while waiting to put the next load in. Sirius and Sam, Marvin’s cat and Henrik’s dog respectively, had taken to hiding upstairs.

“I don’t see what the big deal is,” Anti said as he vacuumed up the couch and cushioned seats. “It’s just Chase. He’s seen this house before, why bother cleaning it?”

“Chase hasn’t been here in awhile! I want him to receive a warm welcome back!” Henrik explained. “I do hope he enjoyed the cottage with Stacy and the kids though.”

“It’s only been two weeks! Not much has changed since!” Anti groaned.

“Jameson turned you into a turtle,” Marvin pointed out. Jameson snickered at the memory.

“Henrik tried his first bit of magic!” Jackie added. “Managed to turn Jameson into a duck!”

“See? Loads happened while he was gone,” Henrik finished. Anti rolled his eyes and went out to beat the rugs.

“Jameson, can you tune the piano? One of us might want to play something upon his arrival, and we can’t have the piano broken when we do so,” Henrik asked. Jameson nodded and happily left his cloth on the staircase, hands aching to touch the piano.

Henrik put the vacuum away and turned to the flower vase on the living room table. Daffodils. They didn’t seem quite as bright as they did earlier.

“Do you think we should change the flowers in the vase?” Henrik wondered out loud.

“Daffodils are Chase’s favourite flowers!” Anti yelled from outside. “I think we’re okay!”

“They look so dull, though,” Henrik remarked.

“I have an idea!” Marvin cried out. He dried his hands and ran over. “Stargazer lilies are also Chase’s favourite flower! Jameson and I have been growing them in our garden while he was gone. I can pluck a few and replace them!”

“Aren’t they poisonous to cats?” Jackie asked, nervously looking over at Sirius, who had descended to lie on the steps.

“Sirius hates flowers, the smell bothers her. She won’t go near them. But just in case-” Marvin picked up the vase and put them on the dining room table, then summoned a forcefield to keep Sirius away. Just for good measure, he also created two plastic cucumbers and placed them around the plant. Henrik and Jackie snickered. Marvin could hear Sirius scowling at him.

“I’ll get some lilies!” Marvin said, picking the daffodils up and running out. He almost collided with Anti, who was holding at least six rugs. Anti threw the rugs down one by one, then flopped onto the couch, yawning.

“Anti, don’t tell me you’re tired already!” Henrik said, sighing exasperatedly. “There’s still so much to do!”

“Like what?” mumbled Anti, eyes threatening to close.

“Like a treat! I was thinking of making a sweet dessert for Chase!” Henrik announced.

“But we just cleaned the kitchen!” complained Jackie.

“Relax, I’ll clean everything when I’m done,” Henrik reassured. “You go rest, I’ll be hogging the kitchen for a while!”

Jackie nodded and gratefully stumbled over to the couch, hoping to catch some winks before Chase’s return.

“Can I help?” Robbie asked, finally emerging from the laundry room.

{I can help as well!} offered Jameson bouncing back from the piano.

“Thanks guys,” Henrik said. “This is a new recipe we’ll be making: Cheddar Biscuits.”

Robbie and Jameson froze and stared at Henrik quizzically. “What?”

“Cheddar biscuits. Stacy emailed me the recipe,” Henrik explained. “They’re apparently really good.”

“Even the name sounds like a treat!” Jameson sighed. “Let’s make them!”

Henrik, Jameson and Robbie spent the next hour or so in the kitchen. Jameson and Henrik did the bulk of the work, Jameson mixing dry ingredients while Henrik did liquid, while Robbie shredded cheese and melted butter with pieces of garlic in them.

Finally, they clumped the mixture together and spread butter on them, then popped them in the oven and washed up the dishes.

When they were done, at least 24 golden brown scones had been made. The six egos marvelled over the glorious little treats. Even Sam and Sirius couldn’t resist coming over and squeezing through to sniff the food. Anti reached a hand out, only to have it smacked away by Henrik.

“Wait until Chase is home, you greedy monster!” he scolded. Anti grunted in frustration.

The biscuits were placed in a little basket with two napkins on top to keep them fresh, then hidden in the bottom cupboard next to the oven, where Henrik kept his coffee beans. No one with a braincell dared to go near Henrik’s coffee supply, and only few ever survived getting in.

*

“Everything is finished! We can rest now!” Marvin cried in delight.

“Can’t wait for Chase to see!” Jackie said happily. “How long before he returns?”

Henrik checked his watch. “Not until 6 o’clock at the latest!”

The egos collectively groaned in frustration. Only 1:30 pm and now they had to wait!

 “You woke us all up at 6:30 in the fucking morning for this?! We could have slept a little longer you know!” Jackie snapped.

“Yeah, especially after you kept us all up with you Facetiming Chase until midnight last night!” Marvin added.

“If Chase notices the bags under my eyes, it’s because of you!” Jameson griped.

“At least everything is ready now!” Henrik reasoned. “Now all we have to do is wait! And not mess up the house in those few hours! If you want to do something, make sure it involves little movement or anything that could shake the house up. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m taking a nap!” He flounced upstairs, leaving the egos to find any activity to pass the time.

*

Two hours passed. Jameson taught Robbie how to play cribbage. Jackie and Anti attempted to teach Marvin how to play, or rather, cheat at Mario Kart. Henrik switched between pacing the front hallway and playing Solitaire and Bio Inc Redemption on his laptop.

“Henrik, do sit down and relax!” Jameson finally said after Henrik got up for the thirteen time.

“I can’t help it! I miss Chase! I want to talk to him again!” Henrik moaned.

“You spent three hours with him on Facetime last night!” Anti exclaimed.

“There is a very big difference between Facetiming someone and seeing them in person!” Henrik retorted. “Do you know how hard it is to talk to him and not smell his vanilla scent or feel his warm embrace? I miss seeing him at the table with his messy hair and stupid puns. I miss hearing his laugh in person. I miss him so badly.”

“Are we jokes to you?!” Marvin demanded. “We miss him too, Henrik, but we have each other. You literally said you enjoyed sitting next to me on movie nights!”

“I know… maybe I’m just being too clingy,” Henrik sighed, sitting down beside Marvin.

Anti snapped his fingers and Mario Kart showed up on Henrik’s computer screen. “Here. Try playing a few games with us and he’ll come sooner.”

Another hour passed. Jameson read. Henrik screamed in fury as he lost another round of Mario Kart. Anti laughed at him. Marvin gave up and started playing Animal Crossing. Jackie grabbed a snack and watched Youtube. Robbie and Sam were fast asleep on the floor. Jameson laughed softly and conjured a blanket to put over them, then went back to his reading.

Henrik was raging so loudly they almost didn’t hear the doorbell. Jameson was the first to hear it. He whistled to get the others’ attention. Robbie woke up and groggily rubbed his eyes.

“Do you hear that?” Jameson asked, putting his ear up to listen. Another ring. Then a voice cried out, “Hello? Are you going to let me in? Did you already forget me? Have I been kicked out?”

Henrik gasped in delight and almost threw his laptop onto the floor, but Anti was quick to save it as the doctor jumped out his seat and dashed over the front door, swinging it open.

Chase Brody stood in the doorway, still playing with the doorbell. He jumped when he noticed the door open.

“CHASE!!!!” Henrik squealed, throwing himself on the vlogger. “I MISSED YOU SO MUCH!!” Chase giggled as Henrik showered him with kisses and squeezed him tightly. Sam danced around them, barking happily.

“Hello, Henrik. Long time, no see.” Chase waved to the others. “Hey guys!”

“Chase! Welcome home!” Marvin said, running over to hug him. “We missed you too, but probably not as much as Henrik.”

“Yeah… Henrik? Could you let me go, please?” Chase wheezed. Henrik was starting to suffocate him. “I… can’t… breathe…”

“Come inside! We made treats!” Robbie cried, dragging Chase in by the hand.

“Did you now?” Chase sniffed the air. “Ooh, I can smell it!”

“We also ordered some chocolate snacks from Shawn Flynn’s Sweet Menagerie, just to celebrate your return!” Jackie added.

“Sounds awesome!” Chase exclaimed.

{Come, make yourself at home!} Jameson said. Chase was led to the couch, where his feet were propped up and a blanket was thrown over him. Sam jumped up beside him and curled up next to him, lying her head on his lap.

Henrik and Jackie set the table while Jameson and Anti got the food out. Chase would have happily gotten up to join them, but he was too tired to move, and Sam wouldn’t budge.

Marvin chuckled when he saw the sight. “Why don’t we eat in the living room tonight? Turn on Netflix and have a little movie fest?” The egos were quick to agree, and Henrik served Chase’s plate to him ona tray, choosing to sit next to him. Sam moved to the other side of the couch, letting Henrik in.

“Here you go! Dinosaur nuggets with mashed potatoes!” Henrik announced, setting the plate down. “Jameson convinced me to mix garlic butter into the potatoes this time, like you used to do!”

“It smells delicious!” Chase exclaimed in ecstasy. He dipped a nugget in the mashed potatoes and ate it, humming happily.

“So what movie are we watching?” Robbie asked, grabbing the remote.

“You’ve probably seen quite a few new movies at Stacy’s cottage,” Jackie told Chase. “Why don’t you decide?”

Chase shrugged. “Just a few. None of us could ever agree, so it was rare for us to watch a new movie. But we all agreed on this sweet little film.” Chase flipped through Amazon Prime until he found a title called This Beautiful Fantastic.

“It’s about a girl who wants to become a writer and slowly learns how to become a gardener.” Chase pressed play and they watched the film. Chase, Henrik and Sam on the couch, Marvin on the purple reclining chair, Anti on the teal green armchair, and Jameson, Jackie and Robbie on the ground.

Halfway through the movie, Jackie remarked, “That father reminds me a lot of you, Chase. I can see why you liked it.”

“Vern?” Chase asked. “He’s just a dad trying to raise his kids. What makes you think I’m like him?”

“You’re both sweet, and a total dork,” Marvin said. Chase playfully threw a pillow at him. Marvin snickered and exaggeratedly hugged the pillow. “I’m keeping this.”

“You both love cooking,” Jameson added.

“And you’re a devoted family man!” Henrik interjected.

“You are all so kind to me,” Chase said with a sigh. “I don’t deserve you guys.”

“Shut up, of course you do!” Marvin said.

“No I don’t!” Chase playfully retorted.

“Shhh, lies!” Jackie hissed, smiling.

“Stop!” Chase cried, blushing. “Seriously though, I didn’t think I would be getting the royal treatment after only two weeks away. I really didn’t do anything.”

“Funny, that’s what we said whenever we returned from vacations and travels,” Jackie remarked. “That didn’t stop you from throwing us a welcome back party.”

“It didn’t stop you from giving me a cake after my 100th successful surgery,” Henrik said.

“Or taking me to a fancy restaurant on my first full day without popping a stitch or losing a limb,” Robbie added.

“You bought me a handsome vest when I got that role I so desperately wanted,” Jameson reminisced.

“You’re a wonderful test subject for all my new spells,” Marvin said.

“You always celebrate us and our successes,” Jackie said. “After all you’ve done for us, I think it’s safe to say you deserve the best from us.”

Chase felt his eyes water up. Face red, he looked down, feeling embarrassed. He rubbed his eyes, smiling. “Thank you. You guys are always so sweet.”

Henrik gently kissed his forehead. “Welcome back, Chase.”

Chase finished wiping his eyes and looked up. “So. What happened when I was gone?”

Henrik grinned. “So, remember when I told you about getting magic lessons from Marvin? Funny story...”

~~~~~

@milo-kno, here’s your punishment >:3 Part one!

@graysun, @florenceisfalling, @miishae, @lonelyseiren, @goldenoceanaart, @egopocalypse, @oasisofgalaxies, @fleecal, @kofi-kiing, @myspatialspace, @jo-ann-ahh-2, @huffletrax, @gemstone6, @dumbasticart, @lunaarmada,@meteorshowersfillthesky, @uhhbeans,  @the-pastel-kitsune, @bupine,  @climbing-starrs, @the-spawn-of-loki, @jadehowlettthewolf, @obsidiancreates, @rammypaige, @hollenka99, @cest-mellow, @randowaffle, @green-protects, @dezi-popp, @badlypostedeverything, @crystalninjaphoenix, @milo-kno, @pixelpixie-pix, @why-killed-markiplier

[irishmacguirefucker]

More of the gangs hobbies after settlin down? Maybe for Tilly, Sean and Javier?

I hope these are alright, it was a little hard to think of one for Javier because i feel like I don't know his character very well, but i feel like he’s one of those people that can just pick up any instrument and learn it with a few pointers and some practice. my sister is the same way lmao. Tilly was inspired by the idea of her having this beautiful plant covered bedroom which I thought suited her. Sean was the easiest because he already has a hobby, and honestly he doesn't seem like the hobby type of guy so at least I had a jumping off point. 

Ranch AU masterlist

Tilly:

When they got to the house, the study and most of the rooms all had bookcases filled with every kind of book from encyclopedias to romance novels to medical texts, anything you could think of. So when they all got there, those of the gang who could read and enjoy doing so were in absolute heaven. Any free time was immediately spent on one of the plush armchairs cracking open a dusty book. Tilly was certainly part of this, and in her reading, she gained a huge interest in plant husbandry.

She insists it’s a hobby because her favorite focus is on rare plants that often have no practical use, but she ends up with extensive knowledge of most herbs and plants. She is a big help in the herb garden, especially when they were figuring out which herbs they could grow where and what they could be used for. Her pride and joy however are the plants she grows in her room. All the upstairs bedrooms have large windows, and over time her bedroom has become full of plants. 

Her room is covered in live plants, rare plants that the others found and brought back, rare plants that she went hunting for, ivy and flowers, everything. She has hundreds of pressed and dried flowers in books and decorating her walls, and she is even learning to make teas, inks, paints and makeup with them. (homemade cosmetic recipes used to be placed in women’s magazines in the 1800s as cosmetics were a staple but not everyone could afford to buy them.)

Sean:

As we know, the man enjoys whittling. Before the ranch, he didn’t take it far beyond some sharp sticks, a few arrowheads and some crude figures, but at the ranch he found himself encouraged to take up this hobby to its fullest. It wasn’t his idea really, Lenny encouraged him. For all his fumbling, he really wasn’t bad with that knife of his and Lenny found a couple of books on whittling. It became both an encouraging way to teach Sean to read and a way to learn more about the trade.

Over time he was following the books himself and carving little animal figures and toy soldiers. He got really good at it, and for his birthday, Hosea and Lenny got him a real wood carving kit with curved knives and instructions on how to make a chess set. Hosea said he promised to teach them all how to play chess if Sean could carve them a whole set, and with that encouragement he got to work. Overall the man isn’t the ‘sit down for extended periods of time’ type guy, but it’s great as a more passive hobby when he feels like resting.

It’s especially great for instances where he has to chill out. For example, he actually managed to dislocate his ankle on the way down the stairs and was down for 6 weeks. When staying still got too hard and Grimshaw wouldn’t let him put weight on the foot, the whittling helped. It gave him something to focus on that wasn’t the feeling of being useless or the energy thrumming through all his muscles.

Javier:

At the ranch, there is a beautiful grand piano in one of the sitting rooms. Benefits of inheriting a rich family estate and all that. For a while, nobody really touched it because nobody knows how to use it. Javier had always been musically inclined, he can hold a tune and play the guitar effortlessly. When he was a teenager he picked it up mostly on his own, he just had a knack for music. The piano, however, can be a daunting instrument. It was a while before he touched it. In fact, it wasn’t until an early morning when half the house was outside and the other half was passed out drunk before he did. 

The only reason he wasn’t out working himself was that he was sick with some sort of stomach bug and technically wasn’t supposed to even be out of his bedroom. He didn’t really play anything that first day. He tested the keys, played them all just to know what sound they made. Before he had really gotten to know the instrument, Ms. Grimshaw burst into the room and he was busted for breaking his quarantine. 

It was a woman at the local bar that taught him how to play it a bit more. She was passing through town for a few days with a group of people and playing music each night for a little extra cash. He found himself flirting with her as she took breaks from playing for the bar, and they enjoyed the fleeting company. She showed him a few basics and he took to it like a fish to water. Like anything, it took time and practice but it was a rapid increase in skill, and eventually, he was playing for them all in the sitting room just like he does with his guitar.

[fencer-x]

Fencer’s Big Eva Review

Just got done watching the Eva finale, so it’s time to get out thoughts while they’re fresh! Caveat: Eva is difficult to understand for native speakers, and I’m definitely not a native speaker XD I feel like I got maybe half, and got the rough gist of like 10% of the rest, and the remaining was just no friggin’ clue. Would’ve gone better if there’d at least been JP subs, but you’ll have to deal with what I’ve got for now!

It should be obvious, but there’ll be HELLA MAJOR SPOILERS for the final Evangelion movie. Ready? Let’s go.

The movie very helpfully starts off with a ~2 min recap of the movies thus far. This was great because I didn’t have time to rewatch the previous three before going, and while I’ve seen them a few times, it took me a second the recall what had happened at the very end of Q, so I was glad to get a very brief recap.

The actual movie itself opens on...Paris! Or Paris post-Near-Third-Impact (Third Impact?), which is a red and black wasteland. It seems that Wille has been developing these things that look like Entry Plugs that they shove into the ground and restore everything to pre-all-impacts (so like, blue water and everything); couldn’t get HOW it managed that, but they had them and were attempting to restore Paris.

Would have been a walk in the park except for weird Eva-Angel-Machine hybrids that were trying to prevent them from activating the plugs. Lots of fighting happens, with Mari piloting her Eva to give them cover while the Wille staff set everything up. Eventually they manage it, and Euro Nerv is restored.

Then we switch over to right where Q left off: Asuka, Clone!Rei, and a catatonic Shinji wandering around trying to go who knows where. They eventually get picked up by...Touji! Yes, an older Touji now who lives in a commune of survivors, scraping out a semblance of a life in one of the areas protected by the aforementioned plugs (they had another name but I couldn’t get it).

In this community, Touji is the local doctor--and he’s married with a kid! He married Hikari, and they have an infant daughter named Tsubame. 

Now, let’s check in how our main three do when introduced to this relatively normal life they get to enjoy for a few weeks:

Asuka: Still in ‘fight mode’, ready to go at a moment’s notice. How she thinks she’s gonna fight when she has no Eva idk, but for this entire little bit, she’s either naked or in her plugsuit. She stays with Aida Kensuke, who’s kind of the handyman, and is generally just rude af.

Shinji: For 90% of this bit, he’s totally shut off. He’s incredibly fucked up from having JUST watched Kaworu die, essentially because of him, and Asuka has on a DSS choker, and every time he sees it, he collapses and begins vomiting violently. He stays with the Suzuharas at first but is quickly sent to stay with Asuka and Kensuke because they don’t really know how to deal with him. Kensuke manages to get him to open up a little bit, but eventually it’s Rei who gets him started on the path back to being himself. At one point he runs away and ‘lives’ alone for a while in what I think was either the building where he first met Kaworu playing the piano or one that looked a lot like it. He goes out to do odd jobs with Kensuke a lot, and on one occasion he’s taken to an ‘outdoor lab’ where some workers are experimenting with new gardening techniques. It’s here he’s meets...Kaji Ryouji. No, not that Kaji Ryouji. That Kaji DIED. This is the son he had with Misato (named after him).

Rei: Now, let me say I’ve never been super interested in Rei. I didn’t dislike her, like I did Asuka, but I wasn’t really interested in her either. She was just there. Guys.....I LOVED REI IN THIS MOVIE. I would have watched 2.5 hours of the Rei Learns To Be A Human show and been happy for the $20 I paid. Rei spends her time in the commune learning to be an individual. She stays with the Suzuharas and learns what different words mean, like “Good morning” and “Good night” and “Thank you” and “Goodbye”, she gets super close with a bunch of old ladies who essentially adopt her and teach her how to plant turnips and what a bath is, and she becomes her own person. When she first arrives, the Suzuharas think she’s “Ayanami Rei”, but she explains that she isn’t, so they call her “Sokkuri-san” instead (”Miss Spitting Image” essentially), and the old ladies find it amusing at first but then encourage her to choose her own name, and when she can’t think of one, they tell her to have someone choose one for her, so she asks the Uber-Depressed Shinji to choose one. These interactions are what eventually pull him back to himself, but ultimately he’s unable to come up with one, because “Ayanami is Ayanami”. She thanks him for trying anyway, returns his SD player to him..............................and then dissolves into a pile of LCL fluid, as apparently all clones eventually return to LCL. Fantastic, because Shinji didn’t need EVEN MORE TRAUMA.

Somehow, the above doesn’t break Shinji, and he resolves to go back to Wille and face his father I guess?? I’m not entirely clear on why (gotta go read some reports of my own I guess lol). Back on the ship with Misato et al., Shinji isn’t forced to wear a choker but he’s put in a cell with like explosives in it I guess. He starts having visions of Kaworu helping him accept things.

At this point it’s getting close to the climax, and Wille are going after Nerv/Gendo once and for all. During the final fight, Asuka tried to take out Unit 13′s core, and then she’s not managing it, she rips off her eyepatch, and we see that the patch was keeping the 9th angel bound within her eye, so she decides to throw away her humanity and let it take over to destroy Unit 13. Unfortunately, she’s killed in the end--how? She’s approached by a vision of her ‘original’. Yup, Asuka was a clone herself, like Rei, and she turns back into LCL and she and unit 02 are absorbed by Unit 13.

Eventually the fight comes down to Shinji vs. Gendo, who has thrown away his own humanity and bonded with Unit 13 in the hopes of completing the Human Instrumentality Project. He and Shinji go head to head as Shinji summons (???) Unit 01 from inside Unit 13, and there’s a really REALLY WEIRD final fight between the two that involves some weird animation choices. Lots of storyboards and overly CGI’d CGI, and some bits that seem to take them through the different incarnations of the Eva series.

We also get Gendo backstory by the boatload as he and Shinji have an actual goddamn conversation for once. Mari features prominently in Gendo’s flashbacks so she was definitely one of his classmates it seems, who introduced him to Fuyutsuki. I’m still not entirely clear on who she is/was.

However, through this conversation, Shinji gives the people he’s interacted with most closely/been closest with closure I guess? Gendo, Asuka...Kaworu.

So about Kaworu. Their conversation was VERY VERY WEIRD; it’s made clear that Shinji is also now aware of all the different iterations of their meeting. When they talk, it’s set at the beach where they first met in the TV series, and Shinji says he remembers all the times they’ve met before. Shinji mentions that Kaworu reminds him a lot of his father, and then there are some very strange flashbacks (????) of Kaworu’s that I feel like imply he’s to Gendo as Rei is to Yui. At one point, he’s seen talking to Fuyutsuki, trying to decide on a name for himself and settling on ‘Nagisa’ as it means ‘beach’, where the ocean meets the land. Fuyutsuki later addresses Kaworu, who’s sitting in Gendo’s desk, as “Commander Nagisa”. Kaworu reflects to Shinji that he failed so many times to make Shinji happy, but he’s realized now that that’s because he doesn’t know what would make Shinji happy and it was arrogant to think he knew better. He was looking for his own happiness all along.

In the end, after all these goodbyes, Shinji is left with the decision of what to do with, well, reality. He decides, in a conversation with Rei, that he’ll reset everything--create a ‘neon genesis’--to a world without Eva or Angels.

Our last shot is an older Shinji meeting his (presumed??) girlfriend Mari on a train platform. On the opposite platform waiting for their own train are Kaworu, Asuka, and Rei. Shinji and Mari hold hands and run, laughing, from the train station.

NEON GENESIS EVANGELION GOT A HAPPY ENDING. 2021 REALLY BE OUT HERE WILDING.

My final thoughts:

Okay I’ll say it: the fuck with Shinji/Mari endgame? Believe me, it was completely out of left field even in this movie. They just happened to be the only final survivors. Mari flirted a hell of a lot more with ASUKA and was distraught at her death than she did with Shinji. They were a kind of cute couple in the end, but very ????? 

I’m disappointed Shinji wasn’t the one to give Kaworu his happiness in the end, after Kaworu spent so long and so many lives and realities trying to make him happy and failing. I’m choosing to believe, since these multiple realities/resets are canon now, that he did it in one of them. They all deserve the happiness of their choosing, not just Shinji’s, and Kaworu showed us time and time again that his happiness definitively involves being with Shinji.

I’m sure I missed a lot, because yanno, Eva, and it was long enough as is, but gosh I wish I could’ve understood more of everything that was going on, cause there was SO MUCH WEIRD SHIT.

If I watch this movie again, I will 500% just be watching those “Rei learns to be human with the help of a bunch of old cackling biddies” bits :> Those were THE BEST PARTS OF THE MOVIE.

[morethanaprincess-a]

As they’ve started to become relevant in a few verses and threads, I wanted to write a little bit about some of Sonia’s extended family. Thus, here is some information about His Royal Highness Prince Arthur, Duke of Neuchatel (King Alexandre’s brother and only sibling, and Sonia’s uncle) and his family.

Note: Each member of this family is referred to as “His/Her Royal Highness” or “Your Highness,” despite Arthur and Olivia being the Duke and Duchess of Neuchatel. Because they are the sole Royal Duke and Duchess (with their titles granted to them upon marriage by the former King), they are addressed as Royal Highnesses as opposed to “Your Grace,” which is how other Dukes and Duchesses within Novoselic would be spoken of and to, if a servant or commoner is addressing them (at parties, or among those in the aristocracy, they are referred to as ‘Duke’ or ‘Duchess.’ No, it makes little sense and yes, it’s a lot to learn if your muse ends up working for/with Sonia in the Royal Family or your muse plans to marry her).

Everything is under the cut, as it’s pretty long!

His Royal Highness, the Duke of Neuchatel - Also known as Arthur, Duke of Neuchatel or informally as Arthur Nevermind (his last name, like his brother King Alexandre and his niece Princess Sonia, comes from their Royal House), he is King Alexandre’s only sibling. Born two years after his brother, Arthur proved himself to be charming and charismatic at a young age. Where Alexandre was thoughtful, introspective, and considerate, Arthur was bold and captivating. He loves a healthy competition no matter where it’s found, but he still grumbles that his brother still bests him in chess. His hobbies included shooting, skiing, and, to his mother’s dismay, gambling.

Despite being ‘the spare,’ Arthur relishes in being in charge, delivering orders and having his plans executed perfectly. It made him an ideal football captain in school as well as a member of the In Utero Student Council during his final two years of high school (he chose which events he wished to engage with. They were few and far-between). He consistently received the fastest training times throughout his military training, from obstacle courses to rope climbs to assembling firearms to driving tanks. His eagerness to guide others to victory made him an asset in the Novoselic Royal Army, where he completed his obligatory two years. He married Lady Olivia, daughter of the Duke of Vaud, two years after the Royal Wedding of-then Prince Alexandre, heir to the throne, and Lady Valentina, daughter of the Duke of Ticino.

Now, he is a full-time working royal for the Novoselic Royal Family with charitable interests in war veterans and science/technology. He’s an avid fan of the national football team, luxury fashion, wine, and his collection of rare watches and sportscars. He attends every Monaco Grand Prix and keeps a yacht on the French Riviera (which, on occasion, he’ll invite his wife along. This is not a frequent occurrence). 

Before Sonia comes of age and graduates university, he is the one fulfilling many of King Alexandre’s international obligations, so he is often away from home. He prefers to travel in style (or rather, he prefers to have his entire life to be lived ‘in style.’).

Her Royal Highness, the Duchess of Neuchatel - Also known as Olivia, Duchess of Neuchatel or informally as Olivia Nevermind, is the wife of the Duke of Neuchatel and Sonia’s aunt. A bit shorter and fuller in the bust than her sister-in-law Queen Valentina, Olivia could be best described as ‘meek and mousy.’ While the King and Duke have golden hair and blue eyes, and the Queen with her platinum hair and green eyes, Olivia still retains the expected (if not requisite) blonde hair of the Royal Family, though hers is a mix of dirty and ash blonde. She has round brown eyes that can make her look permanently surprised if she’s not in control of her emotions.

Olivia is a gentle, soft-spoken woman whom, since birth, has been raised to take her place in Novoselic’s aristocracy. As a child, she loved embroidery, piano, and ballet, but was forced to give up the sport after her teachers insisted she was ‘too chubby’ to continue. From then on, she took up tennis and gardening as hobbies, with the latter carrying on well into her adult life. After marrying Prince Arthur and becoming the Duchess of Neuchatel, Olivia’s interests are, first and foremost, their two children and raising them to be the future Duke of Neuchatel and members of the Novoselic aristocracy.

She spends far more time at home than her husband, though she participates in every official engagement and function the Royal Family asks of her. She is a popular choice to be featured in documentaries and interviews, such as recorded tours around various Royal estates. Her philanthropic efforts are focused mainly around agriculture, animal conservation, horticulture, and children’s charities, and when she becomes of age, Princess Sonia and her aunt often share the duties for animal conservatory and children’s charity efforts.

While she does eat meat, she eats very little of it and tends to choose more fish and plant-based meals. She supports organic farming and hydroponics, and is the host of the annual Novosonian flower show. When she is able to go and invited, she loves to attend Wimbledon.

His Royal Highness, Prince Liam of Neuchatel - Also known as Liam, Prince of Neuchatel or Liam Nevermind, he is Sonia’s eldest cousin on her father’s side and four years younger than she is. A bit taller than his cousin and far more muscular (if not stocky), Liam is brash, loud, and generally unafraid to speak his mind in most matters. If there’s quips being slung in the Royal Family, he’s one of three possible suspects (the others are Queen Valentina and Prince Arthur).

Liam likes to be active and to have a good time, or a good laugh. During Princess Sonia’s first year attending the annual Masquerade Ball, he and some school friends from In Utero Primary School let loose a flock of makango into the ballroom, causing a great uproar when the animals took a dip in the champagne and chocolate fountains and scurried up skirts and trouser legs. Since then, Queen Valentina tends to frown whenever he’s discussed.

He’s not the biggest fan of school, though he has some talent for mathematics and statistics. Languages, literature, and history tend to put him to sleep. What he does like is physical fitness and sports, and won’t hesitate to try most athletics (ballroom dancing, and most types of dancing, are exempt. He hates these). He is primarily a polo and rugby player, but he enjoys football as well and likes to watch boxing and racing. Like his father, he enjoys being part of a sports team, though not necessarily leading it.

Upon graduation, he elects to attend university (or rather, his father tells him he’ll be going) and fulfill his obligatory military service during the school holidays (mostly so he doesn’t become mixed up in his usual partying crowd). While he wanted to be properly deployed, most of his military responsibilities involve defense, particularly at the Novoselic border. He’s frustrated by this and finds it difficult to focus, so during his holidays he’s often found in Spain or Greece, wherever the it-crowd has designated the coolest spot to see and be seen. And like his father, he quite likes luxury goods, expensive liquor, and sports cars. He’s also known to be quite handsome, with his mother’s ash blonde hair and his father’s blue eyes (otherwise known as the ‘Nevermind Blue.’ Sonia’s father, uncle, and Sonia herself all have them, as well as Liam). 

Generally, if anyone’s going to appear in the tabloids, it’s usually Liam, and the Royal Family’s PR team has quite a job making sure anything incriminating never sees the light of day (or the light of a screen). His parents wish he’d settle down and actually have a real, meaningful relationship (that looks good in the eyes of the press and the people), but there’s no one special in his life. His charitable interests involve fitness and sports organizations, and he’s present at as many matches as he can. He loves when he’s sent to the Olympic Games to represent his country in the audience and in interviews.

His Royal Highness, Prince Samuel of Neuchatel - Also known as Samuel, Prince of Neuchatel or Samuel Nevermind, is the brother of Liam and Sonia’s cousin. He is two years younger than his brother and six years younger than Sonia. Where Liam is muscular, Samuel is not: however, he’s a good four inches taller than his brother, with long, golden hair (which he usually keeps tied back) and brown eyes (his mother’s). Samuel was one of the earliest targets of Liam’s jokes and jabs, and therefore he’s a bit quieter and considerate when it comes to his comments. Thoughtful and polite, he’s the ‘spare’ of the family and his parents worried he would grow up with a very thin skin. He didn’t take to athletics or military training nearly as easily as his brother Liam (though he took to video games: they bond over Mario Kart and Smash. It was a harrowing moment in Liam’s life the first time Samuel beat him at both). 

Samuel is also an excellent student: history and art are his favorite subjects, though he gets exemplary grades in everything at In Utero. His hobbies and passions include visual art (he likes to sketch and paint) and playing the violin, and during the summer months he enjoys fishing. He’s very well-read and enjoys attending theatrical and musical productions as part of the Royal Family. Several of his drawings have been framed by his mother or King Alexandre and displayed in various Royal homes. He’d love to have something hung (besides a portrait of himself) in the National Gallery one day.

Upon graduation, he both chooses to attend University (seriously, he couldn’t get there fast enough) and to serve in the armed forces by joining the Novoselic Royal Air Force. Thus, he learned to both drive a tank and fly a plane before he could drive a car. Samuel loves flying for both work and fun, deeming the air to be the only place his family can’t chide or tease him. After his obligatory service, the Royal Family keeps a small, private plane for his singular use.

As he will not inherit the Dukedom (that will go to Liam), Samuel is both career-minded and a full-time working Royal. His charity work and proposed policies revolve around the arts, from new museums to theaters and productions to educational and grant opportunities. He is always working to add more cultural exhibits to every city and town in Novoselic. 

It is often said by the press and public alike that Samuel acts more like they’d expect from the future Duke than Liam, a comment that never fails to upset the entire family. 

[upthenorthmountain]

Heartwood - Chapter Eight

Previous Chapters

The penultimate chapter! One more to go. No more smut, I’m sorry (not in the main story anyway) (you all know that I like to add bits in) (especially, here, we’re not seeing any of Kristoff’s POV, some of that might turn up at some point).

Chapter 8

A few days later Anna had a meeting with Mr Owens. She brought her marriage certificate and he congratulated her, then made arrangements for her to access the accounts for the money her parents had left. She also remade her will, and she’d thought she already knew exactly what she was going to do, but there were so many little niggling details that it took a long time. She wanted to leave the jewellery that had been their mother’s to Elsa, she might as well have it; but had to describe each piece. And she wanted to make sure that Kristoff got his grandmother’s ring back, of course. Then she had to decide what would happen if Kristoff pre-deceased her, or if Elsa did, or if she had a baby (and that led to some feelings that Anna quickly sealed in a box and put away. Another thing that would never happen. No point dwelling on it).

Once everything was done, she said to Mr Owens, “I’d like to buy Bennett’s Field. I’m assuming the developer doesn’t want it any more.”

He hesitated. “I believe it has already been sold.”

“Oh…”

“It can’t be used for housing anyway, now, you know.”

“I know. Thank you.”

She walked out to the taxi rank, annoyed. It had only been six weeks or so; someone else must have been waiting. She should have made enquiries earlier, but she’d wanted to be sure of the money. At least it couldn’t be housing. Hopefully someone just wanted to put some cows on there, or something.

----

Anna had, by now, stopped asking Kristoff about his mysterious occupation. Sometimes it had been fun to think of things to ask (“Are you a taxidermist?” “No.” “Are you a spy?” “No.” “Are you Taylor Swift’s bodyguard?” “From an office shed in the woods? No.”), but soon she found she didn’t really care. It genuinely didn’t matter. Some days he would shut himself up and only come out for dinner; once a month or so he would go up to London on the train and often not come back until the next day. The rest of the time he worked in the garden, or took her on long walks through the countryside, or sat in the living room and played his guitar or the piano.

Anna had been surprised to find out that the piano was in perfect tune. The stool was full of odds and ends of sheet music, and half-remembered lessons from fifteen years ago came back when she sat down and tried to play. It was so much more pleasant to play whatever she wanted, without anyone standing over her or expecting her to make actual progress.

She had all the time in the world now, for other hobbies she’d forgotten about or that were alleged to make too much mess. She sketched the cat in every pose, and did watercolour painting of the flowers from the gardens. Lillian taught her how to make bread, and she got pretty good. And she cycled everywhere she felt like. Sometimes Kristoff would put both their bikes in the back of the camper and they’d go off and explore somewhere else - her legs were getting strong enough to keep up with him, now. 

They also took the camper to the beach, sometimes; sometimes at the weekend during the day, when there were crowds of people and children making sandcastles, and they paddled in the sea and ate ice cream and people-watched; but more often in the early evening during the week, to somewhere quieter, where they might be the only people in miles. Once or twice they slept in the camper overnight, within sound of the waves, waking with the dawn.

That summer lasted forever and was over in a second. Anna helped in the garden and ate strawberries straight off the plant and fresh green peas out of the pod. She gathered sweet peas and poppies and daisies and filled vases in the house, but they never lasted long so in the end she started just enjoying them in the garden. Kristoff didn’t own a lawnmower, it was true, but he did hack down the grass occasionally with a scythe while Anna watched from a safe distance.

But mostly they walked. The bridleway behind the house led to a network of footpaths through the countryside, forests and farms and streams. Sometimes they took a packed lunch and stayed out all day. Anna loved it; sometimes she felt like she was living in a John Foster song. It was hard to remember listening to the music and looking longingly towards the woods, those few months ago.

One time when they were walking through a clearing Anna couldn’t help herself. The beams of sunlight hitting the forest floor were just so - she sang the refrain of Thistle Harvest softly, to the trees. Kristoff shot her a look.

“Must you?”

“Yes,” Anna said firmly, and sang it again, a little louder. Kristoff pulled a face.

“You have a lovely voice,” he said, “But surely you know other songs.”

“That song belongs here,” Anna said. “Right here, in this clearing. Okay, okay, I’m done now. But moments like that are what that song was written for - I don’t care what you think about John Foster, it would have been sacrilege not to sing it.”

He rolled his eyes, said “Well, if you’ve got that out of your system,” and walked on down the path.

----

One night that stuck in her memory was after the end of a long, hot week. The temperature had climbed, and the air had grown denser and heavier until all the weather could do was break, which it did just after nightfall on the Friday. The fresh cold air came sweeping through the forest, and Anna - who had just put on her pyjamas - ran outside into the garden. Her feet were bare and she shivered, but it was wonderful, after so many sweaty days and nights, to be shivering.

“It’s about to pour,” Kristoff said from just outside the back door, holding his toothbrush. “Come in before you get soaked.” Thunder rolled.

“I don’t care if I do,” Anna said. She looked up at the sky, and shivered again at another cool breeze. “I love the air before a storm, don’t you? It feels so alive.”

Kristoff ducked back inside, then he walked across the garden to her, his arms folded. She grinned at him, and he leant down and kissed her - just as the rain started, large wet raindrops that drummed on the corrugated plastic roof of the covered path by the back door, that soaked Anna’s hair until they ran down her back and her nose. 

Eventually they had to run back into the house, dripping and laughing. 

“You’re freezing,” Kristoff said as they stood just inside the back door, “You’ll catch your death -” then he froze, just for a second. “I’ll get your towel,” he said, and he was gone.

-----

If there was a point when things changed, that was it. He was still kind, and perfectly nice and friendly, and a pleasure to share a house with. But gradually he withdrew. He would still happily hug her, put a hand on her arm or the small of her back, but he kissed her less and less. The sex dwindled away as well, and Anna didn’t want to push anything. This wasn’t some kind of - slutty make-a-wish programme. 

Not that she thought he hadn’t wanted to, before - he’d obviously had a crush on her, that was all, and over time it had passed. These things burnt out after a while, sometimes, she guessed. It was still a lot nicer living here than at home, and when she made noises about moving out a couple of times he very quickly told her that she was welcome to stay as long as she wanted, he liked having her here, and that Banjo would miss her, and what would he say to Lillian? So she stayed. They both still wore their rings.

I don’t care if he doesn’t love me, she thought. I hope he DOESN’T, I never wanted him to. He likes me well enough to let me live here, and to be nice to me, and try to make me happy; I don’t want him to love me. If he doesn’t love me, then when I die, he’ll just be a little sad to lose a friend. But I never wanted to break his heart. That wouldn’t be fair.

-----

Anna told Kristoff she wanted summer to last forever. “For everything there is a season,” he said. “Autumn can be nice, too.”

That autumn was mild but wet. On dry days Anna still went for walks, alone or with her husband, but on damp ones he worked in his office and she found things to do at home. It was such a small house that it was easy to stay on top of the housework. Her big project for the autumn was knitting a jumper. Lillian had suggested it - Anna had asked her to teach her how to knit, and was expecting to make a scarf, but Lillian insisted that was boring and that a jumper on big needles would be more fun and not take much longer. They’d made a trip together to the wool shop in town and Anna had chosen soft thick yarn in a mustard yellow. She had to redo the back three times and it came out huge and with one sleeve longer than the other but she loved it and wore it constantly. 

She offered to make one for Kristoff but he insisted she not go to the trouble.

She was wearing it one day when he came into the living room and found her scowling at her phone.

“What’s wrong?”

“Oh, nothing - well - John Foster is doing a gig in London next month, and he hardly ever does live shows, and they released the tickets literally two minutes ago and they’re all gone. I mean, I knew it’d be super-popular. But I did want to go. Not with you, obviously. But Rebecca is a fan as well. Oh, well. Never mind.”

“I’m sorry.”

Kristoff went up to London the next day and got back late; Anna woke when he got into the bed and snuggled up against him, then when she woke in the morning he was already up and out of the bedroom. But when she turned over and put her arm across his pillow, she found something pointy. An envelope. And inside were two tickets to the John Foster gig, paper-clipped together and with a post-it note saying ‘K. Bjorgman’ stuck to them.

“Someone I know helped me out,” was all he would say when she thanked him. “Just please don’t make me go with you.”

-----

Winter was drier and colder. Anna was dreading having to invite Elsa for Christmas - she couldn’t leave her alone, at Christmas - and then got a short text message in mid-December from Elsa telling Anna that she would be visiting a friend over the festive period so would be unable to receive guests. Lillian invited Anna and Kristoff for Christmas dinner, instead, and it was so lovely and cosy that Anna didn’t miss her sister at all.

One day in January it snowed and Anna made a row of snowmen in the orchard. They lasted, melting stumps, long after the rest of the snow had gone, and Anna couldn’t bear to break them down but still hated to see them disappear. “For everything there is a season,” Kristoff said.

He was her best friend. She didn’t think she’d ever had one before. She could say anything to him, and she got the impression he told her things he’d never told anyone else. They were so comfortable together. Anna thought, sometimes, about all the travelling she’d imagined she would do; but why would she want to be anywhere but in front of the fire, reading or chatting or drinking tea, with her favourite person in the world?

He was still free with his hugs, even if he didn’t seem interested in anything else physical. And even without central heating, Anna was never cold at night - Kristoff was like a radiator, and in his sleep he would wrap his arms around her and she would snuggle up close. Anna had never been too fond of winter before, but this one was very bearable. Sometimes, if she woke in the night, she would even deliberately lie there awake for a while, just enjoying how warm and cosy and content she felt.

-----

And then it was spring. And it was Anna’s birthday again.

She’d known, somehow, that she’d see it. She’d always counted on having her full year, even if that would have seemed foolish to say out loud. She told Kristoff she didn’t want any fuss, but he insisted that they at least go for a picnic; so she wore her red dress and brought the sparkly shoes, although she wore trainers to walk to the picnic spot. 

Afterwards, though, she kept the heels on. What did it matter if the mud ruined them? She managed to get over a stile without help, and they were only half a mile away from home when it happened.

Their route took them along the side of a country road, and it crossed the railway line at a level crossing. The lights and alarms were going when they got to it, but the barrier was only just starting to go down, so Kristoff ducked under it and strode across the track. Anna scurried after him  - while mentally tutting at him for not waiting - and nearly wrenched her ankle when her heel got caught in the rail.

“Kristoff!” she called, at first just to let him know that he was leaving her behind. But then she still couldn’t free her foot.

The barriers were all the way down now. Anna put both hands on her ankle and tugged but the heel was caught fast. Then Kristoff was there, and he was trying to turn her foot to free it - Anna was seized with a blinding panic and tried to push him away, the train must be coming - but he wouldn’t go, and her heart was beating so fast that she was certain she was going to die right here one way or another. “Go, go!” she shouted at him - and looked up, and saw the train in the distance.

She couldn’t move. Just for one second, everything froze - and then Kristoff had pushed the strap of her shoe over the heel of her foot and he was pulling her, almost lifting her bodily off the track and into the hedgerow on the other side of the crossing.

The train thundered past, horn blaring. The noise and the wheels were so close and they went on forever, then suddenly stopped.

The road was silent. The birds started singing again. Kristoff stood, and put out his hand to pull Anna to her feet; there was a fallen log lying by the side of the road, and they sat on it.

“Are you alright?” Kristoff said after a couple of minutes.

“Yes.” And oh - how she wished she could have given him a different answer. A shock would kill her, the doctor had said. What could be a bigger shock than what had just happened? But her heartbeat was slowing to normal; she felt a little shaky, but no more than anyone else would, after all that. How could that be? 

“Sure?”

“Yes. Are you -”

“I’m fine.” Kristoff stood and picked up his rucksack from where he’d dropped it, and took out Anna’s trainers. She put them on and handed him the single remaining shoe, the other so pulverised by the train that no sign of it remained. He put the shoe in the rucksack, put it back on his shoulders, and, without a word, turned and walked towards home.

When they got there he shut himself in his office and didn’t come out until after Anna was asleep.

[gumnut-logic]

When the World Goes Boom (Part 7C)

Here is the last bit of Part Seven. This chapter has pretty much been a series of reactions and I hope to get the plot moving again in the next part. Thank you for bearing with me on this and for all your amazing support ::hugs you all::

Spoilers & Warnings: Spoilers for season three, angst, hurt/comfort, brothers and family, possible tissue warning, cos I need one, 1330 words

Many thanks to @scribbles97 @onereyofstarlight​ and @i-am-chidorixblossom for putting up with my crazy and reading this at random moments.

Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Part Five | Part Six | Part 7A | Part 7B | Part 7C

I hope you enjoy it ::hugs::

-o-o-o-

It had taken Grandma some serious persuasion to get John’s father to go to bed, so it was with some small regret, but no less urgency, that John knocked on that bedroom door. There was no question, Dad had to know.

“Dad?”

No answer.

He knocked again. “Dad?”

Still no response.

He gently eased open the door.

His father wasn’t in the bed. Instead a silhouette was outlined by the windows, the afternoon sun masking his father’s form almost black in contrast.

“Dad? Are you okay?” Urgency gnawed at his heels, but caught between his brothers and his father, a few seconds…

Dad turned. “John?”

“I’m sorry, but we have an emergency.” A pause, how to… “I-I need you in the lounge.”

The man spun immediately. “Why?”

“Report in the lounge. I need to find Grandma.” He knew where she was, but he needed an extra moment to compose himself.

His father grabbed his jacket and was out of the room in moments, but worried eyes wandered over him as he walked past.

Admittedly, he could have called both his parents on comms, but this asked for more.

Grandma was in the garden. The vegetable garden on the Island was her stress relief. Here in Auckland she only had the small patch of ornamental shrubs in the backyard. Fortunately, they included several rose bushes that could take the hacking the Tracys sometimes needed. Virgil had been known to cut them almost to the quick in the past due to worry or anxiety. The last episode had seen the immediate purchase of an extra punching bag and a spare piano to save the poor plants’ lives.

The bushes bounced back happily afterwards, but, still, it had been a trying episode.

But not as bad as today.

Grandma’s security guard, Leone, had already slipped into the yard and hovered beside the door, eagle eyes combing the shrubs.

“Grandma? We need you in the lounge.” He didn’t want to tell her.

God, he didn’t.

She stood up, her eyes passing over Leone beside him, but the moment she caught sight of his face she froze. “John? What’s happened?”

“I-I need you in the lounge.”

Her eyes widened.

Virgil was the one who looked after Grandma.

Virgil.

Grandma was suddenly up close, her hand on his arm. “John, talk to me.”

He wrapped his arm around her shoulder. “Come inside, Grandma. Dad’s in the lounge.”

They turned around.

Dad was not in the lounge, but standing at the door, eyes even more worried than before.

“Dad, Grandma, we need to go inside. This is a security issue. As if to emphasize the statement, all three of them jumped as an IR drone hissed in to hover over the back garden. No doubt, there was another in the front yard. Gerald and Tane had already liaised with him and were actioning the necessary protocol.

Eos buzzed in his ear.

Virgil was on full life support.

He closed his eyes for a just a split second.

This wasn’t supposed to be happening. His brothers were on the mend. It was all so sudden.

“John, talk to me.” It was Grandma, her hands were on his chest. “Tell me or I will third degree Eos myself.”

He shook himself and herded both parents into the lounge.

Tane’s eyes darted across them as they entered, the stocky Maori man’s face as stoic as always.

Leone slipped into the room on their heels.

John let his professional façade slip into place. He wasn’t sure he could keep it together any other way. “Grandma, Dad.” His eyes caught grey irises. “We are at a Level One Emergency. Virgil was attacked at the hospital.”

“Attacked?” His father’s question served to echo Grandma’s gasp.

“The situation isn’t entirely clear as yet. Kayo is investigating. Virgil was with Alan for his dressings change. The nurse attending attacked Virgil.” An indrawn breath. “They suspect a sedative was introduced to his system at overdose levels. It stopped his heart.” Another shaky breath. “Virgil is on life support.”

He never wanted to see that expression on his grandmother’s face ever again.

“What about Alan?” His father’s voice was parched.

John swallowed. “Alan apparently took a fall, a few bruises but is otherwise uninjured. Kayo has yet to speak to him in depth. He is…upset.”

“Who did this?” His grandmother’s voice was rough and spoke of threat.

“The perpetrator is in custody. We’re working on it.”

His father held his eyes a moment longer before striding out the door.

John blinked, only to find himself wrapped in his grandmother’s arms. He was unsure as to whether he was giving or receiving comfort, but ultimately, it didn’t matter as he leant down and wrapped his arms around her in return.

Her hair tickled his nose.

“I’m sorry, Grandma.”

She didn’t answer other than to squeeze him tighter.

His father strode back into the room, a hastily packed bag in one hand. “Mom, I want you to pack a bag for several nights, we may not be back for a while.”

“Dad? You have to stay here. It is the safest option.”

His father froze a moment before turning to face John. “If you think I’m staying here while my sons are trapped in that hospital, threatened by who knows who…” He drew in a breath. “They are your brothers!”

John straightened to his full height and looked his father in the eye. “Dad, I am aware of the circumstances. This is not the first time something like this has happened and the Level One Emergency protocol was designed to keep every member of this family safe in such a situation. You are safer here.”

His father stared at him. “Not the first time?”

John firmed his lips. This was not the time to discuss Gordon’s injuries and the fact they hadn’t told their father the full story as yet. “You are safer here.”

“Well, you know what? I never got where I am playing it safe, John. I’m going to the hospital. It is up to you what you want to do.” His father turned and strode towards the door. Gerald moved to follow without a word.

Want? There was no ‘want’ in this equation.

“Honey, he’s going to go, no matter what you say.”

A sigh. “I know.”

“Scott did the same thing.”

“Yeah.” Kayo had been so pissed.

“We should stick together.”

“Yeah.” Kayo was going to be pissed again.

“Grab your stuff, dear.”

“Yes, Grandma.”

So, he found himself throwing a bag of clothes together while Grandma did the same in her room. Tane was as silent as always, but he was in the room with John. He wasn’t going to let him out of his sight bar the monitored toilet break.

Of course, John wanted to be with his brothers, but part of him wasn’t used to being able to do that. Usually there was a good twenty-two thousand kilometres at least between him and them, elevator or no. His responsibility lay in overwatch to keep them safe.

Keep them safe.

“Eos, status?”

Her answer was immediate and precise. “Virgil is secure. Jeremy is monitoring, but Kayo has called in further security to relieve him as soon as possible. Alan has been prescribed a mild sedative to help with his emotional state.”

John rubbed his face with one hand and allowed himself to sit on the bed for just a moment. “A sedative?”

“He was very upset and due to his previous injuries. It was thought best that he be kept as calm as possible.”

Scott would be beside himself. Hell, John wasn’t the best either. But when a brother was injured, Scott took it personally.

Perhaps Dad was right. They needed to be at the hospital.

“You ready, dear?”

His grandmother was pale in the poor light of the hallway.

He grabbed his bag. “Coming, Grandma, coming.”

He strode through the door.

Tane followed and closed it behind them.

-o-o-o-

End Part Seven

[xiolaperry]

The Piano - Chapter 3

Notes: My Camp NaNoWriMo Project for April 2020.  A Rumbelling of the 1993 movie ‘The Piano’. Has 14 chapters, all are written. I’ll post one every few days. Some dialogue is taken directly from the film and from ‘Once Upon a Time’. No copyright infringement intended - I’m just having fun. The film is gorgeous, if you haven’t seen it, I highly recommend that you watch it.

Summary:  Belle French and her daughter arrive in New Zealand to an arranged marriage with Gaston LeGume.  Gaston shows little interest in her or her piano and books. However, Mr. Gold is fascinated…

Rating: E (for smut, dark subject matter and violence in future chapters)

Also available on AO3

--

Tilly and Belle awoke to find the house empty. While they ate bread with apple preserves, Belle noticed a woman's touch about the place: a crocheted doily, ornate china cups with gaudy red roses, lace trimmed curtains at the windows. Who chose them?

Bursting with curiosity, Tilly opened every cabinet and pulled out every drawer. Belle's first inclination was to scold her daughter for being nosy and going through someone else’s possessions. Then she laughed at herself, remembering this was Tilly's home now too. These were now their possessions. So she joined her instead.

They found a washtub, and she had Tilly scrub the mud from yesterday's dresses. If the trek from the beach was any indication, mud would be their constant companion.

Her restless hands tapped snatches of music in accompaniment to the unceasing rain on the roof. A melody expressing her current uneasiness filled her mind, and she ached to play it. She couldn't even read a book to relax.

Midday, she saw Gaston exit the barn. Perhaps she ought to have gone out there to see him earlier, but she had needed the time alone with Tilly to adjust to the new surroundings. And going out in the rain again was just too daunting.

There was a knock at the door. Why would Gaston knock at his own home? She was surprised when she opened the door, not to find her husband, but two women and a red-haired man. Gaston appeared behind the strangers, and she stood aside to let them all enter.

“May I present my Aunt Cora, her daughter Regina, and Reverend Hopper. Everyone, this is Belle and her daughter Tilly.”

Belle bowed her head and curtsied, and prompted Tilly to do so as well. Her first impression of the women was one of overwhelming coldness. Their faces were beautiful but severe. They were the source of the feminine touches. Reverend Hopper was the opposite. His face and manner exuded warmth and welcome. She saw in him a potential friend.

“They're here to join us for a mid-day meal. I forgot to tell you.”

Belle had a moment of panic. What would she serve them? Gaston hadn't given her any time to prepare.

“Don't worry, we brought food with us,” said Cora, indicating Regina's raised basket. Belle motioned to Tilly to set the table.

Fresh bread, cheese, a meat pie, and delicate cookies appeared from the basket. They looked delicious and skillfully prepared. But the uncomfortable conversation soon caused them to sour in her stomach.

“You must be so grateful to have found a man as wonderful as my nephew to marry you,” stated Cora. “Did you despair of ever finding a husband considering your... circumstances?”

Tilly conveyed her mother's answer. “Mama says her circumstances were quite lovely, thank you. And there was no despair, she simply fancied an adventure.”

“I'm sure she did,” replied Cora, raising an eyebrow while stirring her tea.

Belle knew she had to get along with these women. She told Tilly to compliment the tea set, even though she found the large red roses garish and ugly.

“Thank you. That was a gift from us,” answered Regina. “Mother had hoped Gaston would find a woman of quality to take care of them. Oh, well.”

Belle bristled. Would there be no end to their innuendo that she was somehow lacking? Gaston, enjoying his food, was oblivious to the cattiness.

Reverend Hopper attempted to steer the conversation to safer ground. “Would you like me to take a wedding photograph of the two of you? I'm an amateur photographer and always enjoy a chance to indulge in my hobby. You didn't get a ceremony, but you could at least have a picture.”

Gaston brightened. “We do make a very attractive couple. Yes, Reverend, we'd like that.”

“I agree,” interjected Cora, as if they required her agreement. “We shall all return on a nicer day and have it done. Something to show your future children, Gaston.” She patted his cheek, smiling.

Gaston tensed and changed the subject, asking about Regina's latest projects. His aunt told them all about her daughter's accomplishments, how well she could sing, her proficiency as a cook and gardener, and her talent as a seamstress. Belle wanted to ask how such a talented, quality woman was still unmarried but did not want to stoop to their level of petty barbs.

Reverand Hopper stood. “We must be going. Belle and Tilly, it was wonderful to meet you both,” he said. “I hope you will be happy here.” At last, the ordeal was over. After a series of goodbyes, Cora and her entourage departed. Gaston returned to the barn.

When Belle finished clearing the table and washing the dishes, there was nothing left to distract her. She stared out the window at the sullen rain. Her piano and books were alone on the beach, waiting for her to rescue them.

The rain ceased during the night. Sunlight streamed in the windows, cheering Belle and Tilly as they discussed potential adventures. Gaston observed Belle and her daughter at the table, irritated. Their hands danced in silent conversation. It was unnerving. At least she would be useful around the house, someone to watch over things when he wasn't there.

“I have to go away for a few days. There is some business I need to conduct and it can’t wait. Will you be all right here tending to the chickens and other chores?”

Belle smiled and nodded. Tilly replied, “Yes, we will be.”

“We can get to know each other better when I return.” Another nod. “If you have any problems, Mr. Gold lives a relatively short distance away. I'll leave a map.”

Gaston left on horseback. As Belle tidied up, all she could think about were her piano and books. Her life was silent without her instrument. Music filled everything with color. She missed the comfort and adventure of her books.

Household tasks complete, Belle and Tilly dressed in boots and jackets. Mr. Gold had not been friendly, but she had glimpsed something kind in his brown eyes. She was sure of it. He would take them to the beach.

Planks served as makeshift paths through the mud. It was a frustrating and messy business navigating them. The planks, not always close enough, often left too big of a gap to jump. They sank into the mire. At last, they left the cleared area of Gaston's property.

Mr. Gold's house was smaller than Gaston's, but it complemented its surroundings. He had not removed the native plants and trees, instead he had worked with them. It gave the effect of finding an enchanted cottage in the woods.

She knocked at the door and Mr. Gold answered. He had a cane in his hand. She hadn't noticed him using one the other day. “Mrs. Legume. What can I do for you?”

Belle wrote him a quick note. He looked at the paper and stated, “I can't read.” He was not embarrassed to tell her this. His father had abandoned him as a child with his two “aunties.” They were spinners and taught him the trade. School was a luxury he’d not had time for.

Belle was taken aback. She turned to Tilly and signed to her.

“Please take us to the beach.”

“No. I can't. Sorry.” He did not want to get involved. He closed the door.

Belle would not be dissuaded. He had to help her. She plopped down on the porch with Tilly and told her a story to pass the time. It was about an evil sorcerer who lived in a castle he had enchanted to look like a tiny house in the woods. He hunted children and skinned them for their pelts.

Tilly watched, rapt. The more fanciful and gruesome the story, the better. Belle embellished the tale with all sorts of fantastical details, wondering how long it would take Mr. Gold to emerge.

It surprised Gold when he came out to sparkling blue eyes and smiles. Their calmness disarmed him.

“I can't do it.”

They said nothing.

“I have other plans.”

Silence.

It was difficult to argue when the other party would not engage. Gold did not relish them sitting on the porch, staring at him for the rest of the day. This was the easiest way to get rid of them, he told himself as he traded his cane for a walking stick and put on his jacket. He was just removing an annoyance from his property and satisfying his curiosity.

Feigning impatience, he started down the trail. “Aren't you coming?”

The trip down to the beach progressed faster than Belle expected. Since it was only the three of them and they had nothing heavy to carry, Gold took them a different way.

This time she could enjoy the scenery. Instead of focusing on the mud at her feet, her gaze turned upward. The canopy of trees was a lush green against the clear blue sky. Birds fluttered and sang, and Belle imagined their chatter to be cheering her along.

Gold cast an occasional furtive glance behind him to make sure they kept up. When they reached the cliff and Belle caught sight of her things, her face transformed with joy. She and Tilly scampered down the steep incline as fast as they could, overtaking his careful descent. The change in her was amazing.

Belle ran to the piano. She tore at the slats of the crate covering the keys. It took Gold longer to make his way down to the beach. By the time he reached them, Belle was playing music and Tilly was dancing with childish abandon.

Gold watched and told himself the glow he saw in her was just the warmth of the sun. Had he thought her beautiful before? He was wrong. She was exquisite. Her eyes were animated and her dark hair came loose from its braid, whipping in the wind, red highlights flashing in the day’s brightness.

It was a moment he would always remember. Standing in the sand, the waves crashing, birds in the sky. Gold did not have experience with music. Like schooling, it was a luxury he had not enjoyed as a child and he hadn't had time for as he worked to make his fortune. He hadn’t known what he was missing. It was passion, longing, radiance. He was enthralled.

Tilly tired of her dance and made creatures out of shells in the sand. Gold found himself helping, drawing large outlines of seahorses and starfish with his cane. In return, Tilly told him stories of their voyage.

Too soon, their shadows lengthened across the sand. The tone of her composition changed. It sped up, as though the player was trying to cram in as many notes as possible before reaching the end. Tense, staccato sounds slowed into sad, lonely chords. Tilly sat down next to her mother and they played a brief, simple duet in farewell.

Gold helped Belle re-secure her piano. Before he thought better of it, he spoke. “Would you like to bring some books back with you? We can put some in my satchel.”

Belle opened a trunk, carefully peeling back the waterproof canvas. She looked at the books like a woman forced to choose between her children. She handed him a heavy botanical tome and a book of plays to put into his bag. Tilly was given a slim book of poems that she could easily carry, and Belle took a larger book of poetry for herself. She wished she could teleport all the books by magic and reminded herself to be grateful to have these four returning with her. It was better than nothing. She closed the lid on the rest.

It was time to leave. On their way back, Gold missed the Belle from the beach, the one who was lit from within with joy. Each step took them further away from the beautiful day on the shore. She wilted when the house came into sight. Reality returned.

Through Tilly, she thanked him.

“It was no matter. I simply wanted you off my porch.”

She laughed soundlessly, her expressive eyes appearing to see straight through him. He rubbed his fingers, uneasy from the scrutiny.

“Mama would like to know if you would care to come in.”

“Now why would I want to do that? Here, take these heavy things,” he said. Uncomfortable, he thrust the books towards Belle. And with that, he spun around and trudged home, his ears still hearing the music from the beach, his vision full of Belle's hands dancing on the black and white keys, and the memory of Tilly twirling in the sun.

--

Link to music Belle played on the beach -  (Composed by Michael Nyman for the film "The Piano".)

[dandelliongirl]

What a year

2020 was..

The last time I wrote anything it was April, and now it is the 23rd of December and I’m about to go spend Christmas with my family. My last failed attempt at christmas bread is in the oven (for some reason it didn’t proof at all, I guess I put too much flour in..) and I’m cooking up some Christmas porridge on the stove. Watch me burn that in a moment too.. For some reason this whole autumn has been a very stressful disaster. I am still working from home and just logged myself off of work until the 7th of January 2021. Maybe because I’ve been working from home it feels difficult to get into holiday mode. At least we got some snow today so it looks beautiful.

Spring and summer 2020 were an absolute dream! With no responsibilities and the possibility to work from anywhere I got to spend so much time with my family and at our summer house away from the stress of the real world. I could not have dreamt of a better summer, and apart from strawberry picking (at an actual farm, not just from my own strawberry plants) I got to finish off my summer’s to-do list. I even made a cute little summer video with my old Canon EOS 100D (yes - I have a new Canon EOS 90D now!). Endless days of exploration, swimming, biking, sauna, gardening, having lunch with the midsummer roses, baking rhubarb galettes with my own rhubarb from the garden, biking to the ice cream van, SUP-boarding with dad and spending so much time outdoors made me happier than I could ever be. I cannot believe how many beautiful things COVID has given me despite it’s awful impact on the world.

The start of the autumn semester was chaotic to say the least. Practically all of our system integrations are behind one developer, and he happened to be on vacation when everything went down, and study rights did not transfer correctly. This lead to an insane rush of support requests across the board, and lots of extra stress. I was exhausted and scared after last autumn’s disasters and definitely didn’t need another one to start the new semester. I’m starting to seriously fear August... Other universities have tens of people in their technical support, and we have TWO (sometimes 3). In more positive news I was given a permanent job contract starting August, which was amazing, and makes me so grateful especially during a year when many lose their jobs and get laid off. I guess that also contributes to my levels of stress as I cannot hide behind “I just work here for another few months”, but I have to actually take responsibility and ownership as a permanent team member.

Basically a lot of things escalated at work this autumn because our entire staff is way over burdened with COVID changes and the systems not working in an ideal fashion. Because our organisation does not have clear and defined process ownerships many changes come alongside the implementation of new systems, which puts me as a system admin (and not a process expert) in an awkward position. Hopefully our organisation will be able to develop and reconfigure responsibilities with some outside help, but for some reason my hopes aren’t very high.. All in all the anger and frustration of the organisation has been reflecting on the way people treat us and each other and as an empath it has been very exhausting. Luckily my new team is amazing and I’m having so much fun working with them - even though we aren’t physically working together at the office. I cannot imagine how it would be if my previous colleague hadn’t left. I hope she is happy and thriving as well!

All in all what got me through the autumn was the fact that I got to work from home. Being able to take a 10-15 minute nap when things got overwhelming pretty much saved me. Also the fact that I can wear whatever, make tea or snacks whenever I need to and don’t have to spend time moving from one location to the other. My guy got his own computer desk and a proper chair, and we’ve both been working from our very crammed but cozy livingroom. Even though our hobbies have been on and off I’ve gotten a few moments to myself and have also gotten used to doing my thing even though he is always here. No big relationship drama apart from the occasional little argument.

Ballet and body combat got to continue in person for most of the season. The last couple of weeks of ballet classes were on Teams, and the last body combat class was on Facebook with the season ending a couple of weeks early, but other than that having hobbies outside the house definitely helped. I have also loved having my ballet friend stay home instead of studying abroad. Obviously it sucks for her because it has meant a lot of changes to her plans, but I’ve needed her so much, and enjoyed our walks, hanging out together, going to ballet and the hours we spent outside talking on our way back. Ballet classes have been pretty easy as we only go to pointe and adult classes, but at least we are having fun together, and I like to somewhat maintain my skills even though I am not improving by miles. It’s also easier for the body as I’m definitely no longer a teenager. Starting next year we’ll have a fancy new studio!

After the relaxing summer it has definitely felt like I don’t have enough hours in a day or days in a week to do everything I need to. I cannot believe how I used to do all this and so much more pre-COVID but I guess it’s all because Animal Crossing didn’t take anywhere between 30 minutes to 5-8 hours a day. Oops. Needless to say I have been loving ACNH even though the Halloween and Turkey Day events were a bit too easy compared to New Leaf. I have high hopes for Toy Day tomorrow (YIKES! TOMORROW?) even though I haven’t had to go through the usual process of noting down all my villagers’ wishes, which I definitely miss. I am sad the diy recipe RNG has been so bad though. I’ve spent a couple of days spawning balloons on my beach, and never got the big Christmas tree diy in time. Maybe I’ll get it tonight but it’s definitely too late for this year.. Maybe next year then. I didn’t struggle this much with the maple and mush series diys..

So yeah, last summer me and my friend finished our old photography project and I edited the last sets of photos to give the finished book for her as a Christmas present. I love the project a lot because the learning curve is so apparent between photoshoots, and I found my “style” throughout the process. My EOS 100D started to get weird electronical bugs and definitely wasn’t running very well anymore, so after insane amounts of research I decided to get the EOS 90D from a Black Friday sale. I still need a memory card and a new camera bag for it since it’s so much bigger, but I’ve already planned out some future photoshoots and the theme of the new project, which can be described as “Adventure”, “Expedition” or “Discovery”. I just hope my friend will have time to model for me because I’m yearning to go try my new camera out.

My boyfriend and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary with a friend couple who started dating a week after we did. We took an extended weekend trip to a national park, a spa and a rental cabin. It was so much fun and a very special way to celebrate 10 years together. Especially with an exceptional year like this one has been.

Yesterday me and mum went to granny and grandpa’s place to help with the last of their Christmas preparations, take over some food and sing Christmas songs. I took our old piano book with me and mum played the piano while we sang. Grandpa got teary eyed during a special song and it was so incredibly bittersweet. I don’t want to lose my grandparents but I know it won’t be long since they are both approaching 100 years. I am so thankful for them, and for the time I’ve gotten to spend with them. I just wish I could remember more of it. It seems so unfair that we never have enough time with all our loved ones, and there are so many childhood memories other people remember that I don’t. I wish I could go back in time and observe myself spending time with my grandparents to memorise everything. If I ever have children I’m going to take so many photos and videos to preserve as much as I can for them.

In my post from April I wrote that I had been looking at houses and vacant lots. Well, the house of a childhood friend of mine is listed and I’ve gotten to the point where I’ve arranged my mortgage and left an offer. The sellers didn’t accept my first offer so now I’m going to see the house again on the 30th to see if it’s wort raising my offer. I like the house but it’s definitely a bit inconvenient as it is a 3 storey house and way too big and expensive for our current needs. I just really like the area and it is one of the best houses in that neighborhood. I’m going to let things progress naturally though, and if I end up with the house then it was meant to be. If someone else makes a higher offer I won’t be upset either since we have no immediate need to move. It’s just a bit crammed in our current apartment and I would definitely like to have an actual office for my photography equipment, and a sewing machine/crafting space.

Looks like my christmas bread cracked pretty badly but at least it rose a little in the oven.. Hopefully it is edible. At least the one I made for granny and grandpa turned out better.. Time to go scarf down the last of my porridge (which I didn’t burn by the way!) and then try to get all my stuff over to mum and dad’s place. Christmas preparations this year have been crazy busy and I definitely regret not being able to enjoy the season enough but hopefully I’ll get more in the spirit tonight. I’m really happy with the gifts I got mum, dad and my guy this year (online and early in October/November to avoid the rush).

I’m hoping to make a new year’s post on here as well either before 2021 or during the first week. I just like writing things down so that I can look back on where I’ve been. :)

Happy holidays whether you’re spending them with your loved ones (in real life or through a video call) or alone.

[gl0wupdiaries]

Novena for the Month of May

My grandmother was born on the 25th of August 1937. She grew up with five other siblings (she is second to the eldest), all of which are female, to a Spanish mother and an Ilocano father. She lived a simple childhood in their town, and like any other typical Filipino child during her time, one of her earliest memories was when she managed to place her right hand over her left ear, which meant that she finally qualified for elementary school. There she would learn how to sew, knit, garden, manage poultry, and many more. 

A picture of a brusque lady, Norma is usually seen playing a competitive game of softball in the muddy fields of her hometown—wearing her bloomers, and is often picking fights with the boys in her class, like that one time when she punched an aviation officer’s son during recess for making fun of her elder sister. Leaving a reddish and swollen mark on his nose, my grandmother got called to the principal’s office, forced to explain herself in front of the aviation officer after her incident with his son. In a coy and mischievous manner, my grandmother, who was then 10 years old, explained that his son was simply wrong for assuming that he can make fun of anyone he likes just because his father is in position—and that the school doesn’t need students like him. Putting the aviation officer to shame, my grandmother was punished for her disrespectful act by receiving more homework and schoolwork than the rest of the kids for a week.  

She always looked forward to her math classes, enjoying the challenge that it gave her, and would often compete with her sisters at night to see who would finish their maths homework the fastest. Under the warm light of their lampara, they fought, laughed, and pestered each other as their mother watched them while waiting for their father to come home for dinner. Living most of her childhood years under the Japanese occupation, most nights for her and her family consisted of dimmed lights, quiet conversations, and tightly shut doors and windows, fearing that they might be seen and located by the Japanese soldiers. Her father, often wary and vigilant, slept near their house entrance, in case intruders try to come in.

She lived in a simple bungalow. The outside façade of their house was full of herbs, plants, and flowers that her mother grew, they had a basement containing pigs and poultry for their livelihood, and their main house consisted of two bedrooms for her parents and her sisters, a living room, and a kitchen. She would often recall the homeliest part of her childhood home: the kitchen. There, she spent most afternoons with her mother, who was frequently sick, learning about Kapampangan dishes, house chores, and life lessons. She distinctly remembers the short bamboo poles placed at a corner of their kitchen, where their glasses were placed for drying.  

Growing up, she looked up to her grandfather, Tatang Kiko, and would always visit him in his home after school. He is frequently seen riding his kalabaw with a wooden cart attached to its back, which they called gareta, containing fruits and vegetables that he harvested as a farmer and sells on the market located at the heart of their town, or bayan. He was kind to her, giving her apples, mangosteens, and even tomatoes to bring home for her sisters, taught her majority of what she knows about gardening today, and even showed her the proper way to ride a kalabaw. Almost every day, during her elementary and early high school days, she would visit her Tatang Kiko, and would enjoy his company and humor. She found a sense of comfort with his presence, a feeling that she had a difficult time finding in her own home, because of the tension within her family caused by her mother’s sickness and their poverty-stricken life. 

One hot summer in the month of March, when the camachile (Manila tamarind) trees were in full season and being picked by the local children of Floridablanca, my grandmother was on her way to visit her Tatang Kiko after a long day in school. Taking her usual route in the sandy roads of their baranggay, one of the local vendors of their market ran towards my grandmother, bringing with her devastating news. Her Tatang Kiko was on his way home from a kaningin session with his friend; he was seated at the trunk of his friend’s truck filled with sugarcane. As it passed by the rocky portion of the mountain, he fell out of the truck. His friend, still clueless, continued to drive his truck, not knowing that he ran over Tatang Kiko. 

My grandmother, crying, dropped all her stuff on the ground and ran as fast as she could to her Tatang Kiko. Not once did she stop to catch her breath; she kept running until her heels and ankles developed calluses. She reached the mountain, and there, she was faced with his dead body, his white shirt covered in blood and his lifeless eyes staring at nowhere. Holding her Tatang Kiko with her bloodied hands, my grandmother lost one of the most important people in her life within an instant. Screaming for help, not once did she let go of her grandfather, crying in his arms. She went home without any fruits and vegetables that day.

In the early 1950s’, my grandmother met my grandfather, who was then a Liberal Arts major, and my grandmother a fourth-year high school student. She met my grandfather while he was on vacation in her hometown at his brother’s house. My grandfather courted my grandmother for about a year. Within those days, they enjoyed their afternoons together, picking camachiles, mangoes, and whatever is in season, and had those for their merienda. Sometimes my grandfather would let my grandmother sit at the back of his bicycle as they explored the town, going to places such as the palakol river, this place called “Riverside”, and many more. At the end of the day, my grandfather would escort my grandmother home, oftentimes receiving stern looks from my great grandfather, something that my grandmother laughs a lot about now. 

My grandfather lived in a large house together with his three other siblings: the eldest brother a priest, his second brother a pre-med student, and his youngest sister an elementary student, who will later on become a nun. My grandmother always talks about the big foyer in my grandfather’s childhood home, and how beautiful it was; it had huge black and white marble tiles, large windows, tall white walls, and beautiful antique furniture. There, my grandfather would often play the violin, accompanied by his second to the eldest brother who plays the piano. My grandfather’s family was influential during that time, because his brother was a priest, which was deemed as a high status and position back then. 

My grandmother wasn’t able to go to college because her parents couldn’t afford then, and so she went to beauty school, which proved more affordable. After she and my grandfather finished their studies, they got married and had four children. They lived a simple life, moving from town to town, until they finally settled down in a small city by the bay. There, they bought a big empty lot in a small barangay for 10,000 pesos and built their home there. Throughout the years, they both worked hard--my grandmother as a government employee, and my grandfather as a Base employee--in order to sustain their four children. Soon enough, all of their four children graduated college and started their own lives.

When I was born, I lived in my grandparents’ house until I was five. Back when I was two, my grandfather died because of gastric cancer, and left my grandmother devastated and depressed. During those years, I spent most of my days with my grandmother, because my mother had to work. She wasn’t loving, nor was she sweet and soft spoken, she was short-tempered, and would often shout at me and my cousins whenever we’re playing at her garden, saying that if we ruin any of her flowers, she’ll spank us and send us home. I used to not like her because of how different she was from my mother who was gentle and nurturing. As a kid, I often dreaded it when I had to visit her, because all she did was scold me and my mother. But as I got older, I started to understand her more, over and beyond her harsh external. 

She is very religious, as most of our grandparents are, and goes to church every morning, much less nowadays due to her weakening health. Sometimes she gets a bit vocal, especially to our housekeeper and other people serving us. She has the habit of insulting them—her intentions are good, but she has a harsh way of showing it. She cooks a lot of kapampangan dishes too, that’s why I never leave the house with an empty stomach. One time, I asked her why she makes such a big fuss about what meals are going to be prepared for the day, and her answer was simple and short: “I don’t want my family eating bad food, because it’s bad for the soul.” Despite us two not getting along most of the time, there are times where she makes me realize things too.  

One evening in May, as I was reading a novel in our living room; my grandmother approached me and asked “Marunong ka ba mag basa ng Tagalog?” (Do you know how to read Tagalog?) And I told her that I can. I asked her why, she walked towards me and said “basahin mo yan,” (read that,) as she placed a small booklet on our coffee table. When she left the room, I took a look at what she placed on the table; it says: Novena ng Santa Rita (Novena of Saint Rita). She is a devotee, and even offered her house once as a place for the almost five foot tall Santa Rita relic. It made me laugh at first, but then I realized that I’ve read lots of books, but I have never really taken the time to read anything about my religion, regardless if I believe it or not.

A few weeks after that evening, my grandmother was sent to the hospital because of a major blood infection. She was straddling life and death, and the doctors weren’t sure if she’d survive. I wanted to tell her that I was sorry and that I’m ready to listen to and bond with her. And as I recall that short-lived connection that we had in the living room, I felt regret; I should have asked her what that novena was about, why she’s so attached to our religion, what she feels whenever she prays—all these questions that I never bothered to ask because of my closed mind.

She survived that hurdle and is enjoying her life at 83 now. Though she isn’t as sharp as she used to be, she is still the strong woman that she was when she punched that boy in her class. This is the story of how I got to know my grandmother, not only as the person that I see in the kitchen, but as the strong figure that keeps our family together, and a role model that I will forever look up to. 

Nowadays, I talk to her about stories from when she was young—the stories that I have written here—and spend as much time with her as I can. Sometimes, I would join her in the kitchen and help her with her work. And I stayed, no matter how harsh her criticisms may be. And on rare occasions, I join her in her praying rituals too, without sulking. 

[lovemesomesurveys]

1. Humpty Dumpty: Have you ever felt so broken that you didn’t feel like you could be put back together again? That’s how I’ve felt for a long time now.

2. Jack and Jill: Have you ever tumbled/rolled down a grassy hill? No.

3. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star: Do you enjoy stargazing? Has anyone ever gotten a star named for you? I don’t stargaze per se, but I’ll look up and acknowledge the stars sometimes for a moment. Aww no, no one has had a star named for me. 

4. Little Bo Peep: Have you ever thought you lost something that was actually right in front of you the whole time? Yeah.

5. Itsy Bitsy Spider: What do you typically do on a rainy day? I don’t do anything different except for acknowledge that it’s raining. I love listening to the rain.

6. Baa Baa Black Sheep: Do you own any clothing made out of wool? No.

7. Ring Around the Rosie: Did you know that this childhood song/nursery rhyme is actually about The Black Death? Yep. Children back then made nursery rhymes during plagues, people today have memes. 

8. Five Little Ducks: Have you ever gotten lost before? Yes.

9. I’m a Little Teapot: What is your favorite flavor/type of tea to drink? Peppermint, spearmint, and chamomile. 

10. Hokey Pokey: How were you taught to understand the difference between your left and right sides? Hmm. I’m not sure.

11. Old MacDonald Had a Farm: What is your favorite farm animal? Horses.

12. Make up your own lyric for “Down By The Bay”. Okay, how about: “Down by the bay, where the watermelons grow, back to my home, I dare not go, for if I do, my mother will say, did you ever see a cat playing with a bat down by the bay.”

13. Little Miss Muffet: Would you be terrified if a spider sat down beside you? UH YES. That’s happened a few times where it was near me or even worse, ON ME. lsjfkdfklsd.

14. Rockabye Baby: Do you feel that this is a more calming or terrifying lullaby for children? It sounds calming, but yeah the lyrics are disturbing. “when the bough breaks, the baby will fall, down will come baby cradle and all.” Uh....

15. Hickory Dickory Dock: What are you usually doing when the clock strikes 1? 1PM I’m still asleep. 1AM I’m probably eating ramen and watching YouTube videos.

16. Pat-a-Cake: What’s your favorite thing to bake/baked good to eat? I don’t bake, but I love brownies, cupcakes, and muffins.

17. Why do we stomp our feet if we’re “Happy and We Know It”? Shouldn’t we be doing this when we’re angry instead? True.

18. The Wheels on the Bus: Where’s the furthest you’ve ever gone on a bus before? Not far, like just 10-15 minutes.

19. Row, Row, Row Your Boat: Do you enjoy boating? (ie: cruises, kayaking, canoeing, white water rafting, etc) I don’t do any of those things.

20. 3 Blind Mice: Do you know someone who is blind? Yes.

21. 3 Little Kittens: Do you prefer gloves or mittens when getting dressed for chilly weather? Gloves. I rarely need to wear them, though. 

22. Jack Be Nimble: Do you enjoy lighting scented candles? I like the idea and aesthetic of it, but I don’t actually do it. I wish I were a candle lighting kinda gal.

23. Teddy Bear, Teddy Bear: Have you ever made a teddy bear or any other sort of stuffed animal at Build-a-Bear? If not, do you still have a favorite teddy bear/stuffed animal from your childhood? I have a lot of my stuffed animals from my childhood stored away.

24. 5 Little Monkeys Jumping on the Bed: Have you ever cracked your head open before and needed stitches? Nooo, thankfully.

25. Hey Diddle Diddle: The cat plays a fiddle. What instrument would you like to play? Piano.

26. Mary Had a Little Lamb: Have you ever brought a pet to school for show and tell before? No.

27. Once I Caught a Fish Alive: If you go fishing, do you release the fish afterwards, or do you take them home and cook them? The only fishing I do is in Animal Crossing haha. In which case, I sometimes keep to sell or let ‘em go. 

28. Little Jack Horner: What is your favorite flavor of pie? The only kind of pie I like is cheesecake.

29. Mary, Mary, Quite Contrary: Do you have a garden? What do you plant in it? Nope. I do in Animal Crossing, though lmao. 

30. Miss Mary Mack: Do you wear clothing with a lot of buttons? I don’t like wearing stuff with buttons. Too much work.

31. Old Mother Hubbard: What is your favorite food to keep in your cupboard? Ramen.

32. There Was an Old Woman Who Lived in a Shoe: Do you have a lot of siblings growing up? Did you enjoy it? Why or why not? I only have two brothers.

33. This Little Piggy: Do you like roast beef? No.

34. Rain, Rain Go Away: Have you ever played outside in the rain before? Yeah.

35. It’s Raining, It’s Pouring: Do you know someone who snores very loudly? My dad does.

36. Star Light, Star Bright: Do you ever wish on stars? Has one of your wishes actually come true before? Nope.

37. Here is the Beehive: Are you allergic to bees? Do you know anyone who is? Do you enjoy eating honey? Isn’t everyone, technically? Though some have more severe reactions. I’ve never been stung by a bee, thankfully, so I don’t know what my reaction would be like. I don’t recall the last time I had any honey, but yeah it’s good. It’s good with peanut butter on toast.

38. If All the Raindrops Were Lemon Drops and Gumdrops: What food would you want to rain down from the sky: That doesn’t sound pleasant lol.

39. Little Boy Blue: Have you ever slept anywhere other than a bed before? Where?                       The couch, floor, and the car.

40. Do You Know the Muffin Man?: What is your favorite type of muffin to eat? Banana (without the nut), blueberry, and lemon poppyseed. Also, Entenmann’s has mini muffins in party cake flavor that are really good.

41. Wee Willie Winkie: Have you ever sleepwalked before? No. I’ve never known anyone who does, but it sounds scary to witness. 

42. B-I-N-G-O: If you had a dog, what would you name it? I have a dog, her name is Princess Leia.

43. Oh Where, Oh Where Has My Little Dog Gone?: Has your pet ever run away from home before? Did it get returned? Nooo. I would be a complete mess if my dog ever ran away. One of my cousins has a dog who roams the streets and comes back randomly and she’s fine with it. I’m just like noooo way. I couldn’t allow that. My doggo is my baby!

44. How Much Is That Doggie in the Window?: What’s the most you would spend when adopting a dog? We paid about $150 to adopt our doggo.

45. This Old Man: Do you own any knick-knacks? Yeah.

46. 1, 2, Buckle My Shoe: When did you learn to tie your own sneakers? I think I was like 4. I remember going around the house tying all the shoes once I learned. 

47. Are You Sleeping?: What time do you typically go to bed at night? Like 7AMish. :X I don’t understand how that became my norm these past few months. [a-zebra-is-a-striped-horse]

[jamaisjoons]

bloom | pjm

Summary: Jimin grows flowers in the garden of your chest wrought from the pain of your unrequited love. Hanahaki AU.

Pairing: Jimin x Reader

Genre: Smut, Fluff... lot’s of angst oh boy

Word Count: 15k

Warnings: Mentions of alcohol, Park Jimin in general, switch!reader, switch!Jimin, light fingering, thigh riding, non-protective sex, creampies, and yet sweet, soft sex? 

A/N: I’d be lying if I said this wasn’t inspired by the lyrics ‘In this dream that won’t ever come true, I grew a flower that couldn’t be blossomed’ from Fake Love

Plant

def. put a seed in the ground so it can grow

It’s a cold winter day in Seoul, Korea. The streets are covered in a thick, soft blanket of snow that began settling as soon as the bustle of people that trudged through decreased. Now, there were barely any people outside, you were sure that if you looked out, you could count the number of people easily; which was completely different to what Seoul was usually like. Snowflakes still fall leisurely and the windows are frosted over, the icy glass showing warm scenes of children playing in the snow, or couples walking hand in hand through rows of plum blossom trees that have been stripped bare, instead covered in crystalline flowers made of ice.

You don’t really care to look out, instead you find yourself seated on a sofa, legs tucked under your butt, cup of hot chocolate in your hands, keeping you warm as you snuggle further into the warm quilt wrapped around you. You’re currently in the BTS household, enjoying a happy Christmas day as you sip your hot chocolate and leisurely read your book.

You had been introduced to BTS two and a half years ago, three years after their debut when you’d reconnected with your best friend, Hoseok. You say reconnected, when really you hadn’t lost touch. By reconnected, you just meant seeing each other and speaking a lot more regularly than the previous years. It had just been difficult keeping up regular correspondence with his busy schedule but the two of you had tried, speaking whenever he got some free time. Despite the change from hanging out with him almost twenty-four seven to only being able to speak to him for a few minutes a week, your friendship had somehow stayed strong. The two of you had grown up in Gwangju together and had always been as thick as thieves. Hoseok was like the brother you never had, the only real family you’d had left.

The first few years had been hard for them, you knew it. Hoseok would complain about the long nights and the less than pleasant sleeping arrangements. Sharing a single, cramped room with six other strangers was probably never going to be ‘pleasant’ but somehow it worked. You remembered nights when Hoseok would go on and on about each of the members, all their quirks and habits, things he loved about them and even things about them that annoyed him. Five years down the line however, those very same boys were practically family and you had never seen Hoseok smile as bright as he did when he was with them or even when he was performing.

A year ago, when you’d finally finished university and gained your doctorate, you’d moved to Seoul from Gwangju. Hoseok had been over the moon, bouncing around excitedly at how you’d finally be in the same city and be able to see each other more often. That is, as often as he could fit you in around his busy schedule. You had also finally met the boys, all of you laughing as if you’d known each other for years. Which, you supposed, you had. Hoseok had told you everything he could about them and vice versa. In turn, you had introduced Hoseok to your own best friends. The four girls who you had met during your time in university, who had become your sisters by choice.

So that brought you to today, two and a half years later, a Christmas day surrounded by the ones you loved the most. The smell of delicious food fills the air, Seokjin’s cooking making you salivate as he yells at his girlfriend, Sooji to stop touching things. You roll your eyes at that, wondering why she even bothers. She’s completely useless in the kitchen. You remember that one time she had tried cooking noodles at university but had somehow forgotten the actual noodles. You weren’t even sure how she’d managed that. You stifle a laugh when Seokjin finally kicks her out the kitchen, watching as she scowls before making her way to her other lover, sitting beside Yoongi as he plays the piano. Hae and Taehyung sit on the floor, the couple playing with Yeontan as the pup happily bounces about the two of them, enjoying the attention he’s receiving.

Hoseok’s raucous laughter joins the dulcet notes of the piano as he straddles his girlfriend, fingers wriggling across her sides and drawing out wild laughter from her. She hopelessly calls out to her other boyfriend, Namjoon, for help but her calls fall on the deaf years of the leader currently sitting opposite you; head so far buried into his book that he downs out the commotion around you. From the other side of you, Suri and Jungkook yell and swear, the two of them competing in what looks like a seriously intense match on Overwatch, Jungkook scowling at his girlfriend when she somehow beats him at his favourite game, accusing her of cheating with a pout.

“____?” Someone calls and you’re broken out of your thoughts as you turn around, smiling brightly at the newcomer. Park Jimin stands behind the sofa, peering at you with a large smile that has his eyes wrinkling.

“Jiminie! Hi, is there something you need? Where did you disappear off to?” You ask, shifting slightly when he sits right next to you.

“I actually went to go get my Christmas present for you” Jimin says and your eyes widen in surprise.

“You got me another present? You really didn’t have to” You said shyly, a small smile on your face. All of you had already exchanged gifts; and usually, all of you only exchange one gift between each other. You watched Jimin shrug as he handed you the beautifully wrapped present. the blue foil wrapping glistened in the warm light, gold glitter snowflakes imprinted on them twinkling as you took the present from him, eyeing the intricate bow on the top, wondering if he’d tied it himself. Jimin had always loved giving and wrapping presents.

“I just saw it, and it made me think of you” Jimin said with a shrug, urging you to open it. You carefully pulled the bow apart, peeling away the wrapping paper as you unwrapped the present. You felt your heart quicken slightly at the sight of the jewellery box, carefully opening it with shaky hands before letting out a soft gasp. There, nestled in the velvet box, was a delicate gold chain with a small flower pendant studded with incredibly small diamonds, that sparkled whenever it caught the light.

“Jimin, I-. This is too much” You choked out, trying to hand it back to him. Jimin simply shakes his head, refusing to take it back.

“____, it’s a gift! Like I said, I just saw it and it just made me think of you. Here, let me put it on” Jimin said, cautiously picking up the necklace, gesturing you to turn around. You slowly do so, pulling your hair into a high ponytail so it’s out of his way.

Jimin carefully places it around the column of your throat before lowering it slightly, so the pendant rests between your collarbones, at the base of your throat. You suck in a sharp breath when his fingers brush softly against the bare skin of your neck as he clasps the necklace. You release a breath you weren’t sure you were holding when he finally backs away, smiling brightly as he takes in the sight of the pendant against your skin. He lets out a small nod of approval, smile widening until his slightly crooked teeth are showing.

“I knew it’d look good on you! As if it was just made for you” Jimin chimes, but you barely hear it. Instead, your thoughts are occupied with nothing but him. You had always known he was gorgeous, a male Adonis walking the earth.

But for the first time in two and a half years, you reallylook at Jimin.

His hair is back to its natural dark colouring and despite the amount of times it’s been bleached, it still shines with a certain soft silken quality that you almost find yourself becoming jealous. It currently has a slight curl to it, falling in waves into his eyes and you can just imagine the cute little birthmark that it’s currently hiding. Your eyes dart over his face, taking in his beautiful warm olive skin; he’s currently barefaced, his cheeks tinged a slight pale rose colour, cheekbones almost glowing in the warmth of the light. His eyes are a sharp almond shape and heavily lidded, deep dark coffee irises peep at you through them, eyes twinkling with joy.  You find yourself thinking you like them best when they turn into slits, eyes crinkling in his signature eye smile, because he looks best when he’s happy.

His slightly wide nose sits between his adorable cheeks. They’re currently raised high, like small little mochis under his eyes. You want to reach over and pinch them, because really, how could anyone resist wanting to squish Park Jimin’s cheeks? They’re the cutest thing known to man and even the hardest of criminals would coo at them. You’re sure of that. Your eyes trace down to his full, plush lips. His upper lip is a perfect cupid’s bow and somehow his bottom lip is even fuller than his top. They look incredibly soft and pillowy and you find yourself wanting to pull them between your teeth and nibble at them. But you can’t. So instead, you trail your gaze towards the angular and well-defined curve of his jawline.

When your perusal is done, you conclude that Park Jimin is the most beautiful human to ever walk the earth. Between his ethereal looks, handsome facial features and adorable expressions, he really is an angel.

And it’s like you’re seeing Park Jimin for the first time.

Your chest constricts with a slight discomfort, but you brush it off because you don’t realise the significance of the ache.

You don’t realise that the seeds of love have been planted deep within your ribcage.

Germinate

def. a seed beginning to grow

A week later is the next time you see Jimin. It’s at a New Year’s Party that the boys are throwing. There are a few idols around that you recognise, but many of them you don’t. Everyone is dressed to the nines and despite your own ensemble consisting of a beautifully crafted forest green floor length dress (a gift from Hoseok, because the man wouldn’t take no for an answer and lovedto spoil you) you can’t help but feel insecure.

Female idols are all around you, their slim and stunning bodies putting yours to shame. But it’s not only that. They look so put together, make up expertly done so you can’t even tell they’re wearing any, skin radiating with a youthful glow and hair falling in locks of silk down their backs. Somehow everything about them is flawless, from their nails, to their hair, to their laughs. Everything is somehow perfect, and they hold themselves with a certain grace you know you’d never have. Somehow, it feels as if you don’t belong here, as if you’re intruding in on a world that will never really accept you.

“____, are you okay? You zoned out a bit” Sooji calls, and you turn to one of your best friends. Her face is morphed into a look of concern but you simply brush her off.

“Oh sorry, I’m fine really. I just spaced out, where are Seokjin and Yoongi?” You ask but she shrugs, letting out a small huff.

“Seokjin is stuffing his face with whatever hors d’oeuvres he can find and you know Yoongi, these kinds of things aren’t exactly his cup of tea. There’s too many people and it’s too noisy” Sooji explains, face softening at the thought of her boyfriend locked away in his room and you nod, sympathising for Yoongi because really, he did try to mingle and interact with others. But sometimes, the crowds and loudness were too much and he needed quiet time to recuperate.

“Oh, damn it, I can see Seokjin and he looks like he’s about to take a bite out of the cake before it’s served. I’ll see you around” Sooji called, waving at you before running off to stop her boyfriend. You rolled your eyes as you watch her scold Seokjin, the latter’s cheeks full of food, making him look oddly like a hamster.

You let out a little sigh before looking around, trying to figure out who to join. There aren’t many people you know here other than your best friends and the seven boys hosting. But as usual, they’ve split into couples. Suri, Hae, Jungkook and Taehyung are speaking to some idols, laughing up a storm and your heart grips with envy at the way the boys hold their respective girlfriends, their fingers rubbing their backs soothingly every so often. It’s a mindless touch, you’re sure they don’t even realise they’re doing it. But you suppose that when you’re in a comfortable relationship, sometimes touches lose their shallow meaning and you do so for no other reason than the deeper comfort it provides you.

Sooyun is dancing with Hoseok and Namjoon and none of them are taking it seriously, you can tell by Hoseok’s highly exaggerated movements and the way Namjoon’s expressions change. Sooyun laughs out loud when Namjoon pulls a particularly racy face as he thrusts his hips, her body falling into Namjoon’s, shaking with giggles. You notice Namjoon’s slightly pink tinged cheeks, but watch as he brushes off his own embarrassment in keeping his girlfriend entertained.

“They’re a cute couple, right?” A voice chimed and you jumped slightly, startled out of your thoughts for the second time that night. You turn to Jimin, brows furrowed slightly before smacking him.

“Jimin! You terrified me, don’t just pop out of nowhere like that” You scolded, Jimin only giggling at you.

“Sorry! I didn’t mean to scare you, you were just staring really intensely at Sooyun-ah, Hobi-hyung and Namjoon-hyung” Jimin laughed and you shrugged.

“You’re not wrong, they do make a cute couple. But sometimes I really feel like I’m third wheeling this entire group… or well eleventh wheeling” You replied as you counted the couples, Jimin laughing loudly.

“Well then count me as the twelfth wheel. But I get your frustration, it’s annoying when everyone is paired up” Jimin grins and you feel your heart flutter slightly. He’s dressed in a dark blazer, embroidered with intricate patterns made of silver thread, the look finished with a simple but tight-fitting white shirt and black slacks. His hair is dyed white blonde, in preparation for their newest comeback, and his eyes sparkle, as if they hold a constellation of stars within them. He looks as amazing as he always does, kind of like a fairy-tale prince come to life.

“Yeah it does, especially when they all start trying to eat each other’s faces off” You joke and he grins at you brightly, covering his face with his small, slightly chubby hands before leaning into you slightly.

“____! Don’t let the hyungs or Taehyungie and Jungkookie hear you say that!” Jimin admonished and you feel your heart gripe slightly, the tinkling sound of his laugh filling your eardrums. You’re sure his laugh causes flowers to bloom and angels to sing. You don’t think you’ve ever heard something more beautiful.

“Damn, it’s getting loud! Let’s go outside” Jimin says and before you can protest, he grabs you by the hand and drags you towards the garden. You suppress a slight shiver, it’s still winter in Seoul and the night air is crisp, the hairs on your neck prickling as goosebumps crawl over your skin.

“Sorry for dragging you out here, it’s probably not the most ideal considering the weather but it means we can speak without having to yell. Here you go” Jimin says, shrugging off his blazer before wrapping it around your shoulders.

“Jimin wait, you’ll be cold” You began protesting, trying to hand it back to him, but Jimin just shrugs you off.

“It’s fine! You need it more than me and it’s the least I could do since I basically pulled you out here. That dress is really pretty by the way, I thought it’d look nice on you. The colour really flatters your skin tone” Jimin compliments; your body stiffens and you look at him with wide eyed curiosity.

“Seok bought me this dress, how would you have known it would look nice on me?” You inquire and even under the light dusting of his foundation, you can see his peeks tinge a beautiful pink, a shade of soft peony that has you wanting to reach out and squeeze them.

“Yeah, I was there when he bought it… he said he really needed help shopping for your Christmas present” Jimin confessed.

“I… thank you. It was a good pick” You thanked, your hair falling into your eyes slightly. But before you react, Jimin is already reaching over for you. His fingers brush your hair, tucking it behind your ears.

You suck in a sharp breath and this time, when you shiver, it’s not due to the cold. His fingers are warm against your skin and even that slight skimming of his skin against yours sends tingles down your nerves. Jimin has always been very touchy feely, skin ship is not something he avoids. In fact, you’ve lost count of the times he’s brushed your hair out of your eyes before, lost count of the amount of times you’ve cuddled up against each other or held hands. No, Jimin is very big on skin ship and it means nothing. Which is why you try not to over think the action.

But you can’t help yourself.

Once again, your chest aches, right where your heart should be. This time, it’s a sharp ache and you’re not sure what it means. It’s gone before you can think it over and you brush it off.

But once again, the significance of the ache is lost on you.

You don’t realise that the seed of love has begun to germinate.

Root

def. to grow roots

Over the next few months, it’s comeback season. The boys are everywhere promoting and yet despite how busy they are, you still see them more often than not. The girls are always dragging you to their promotions, standing in the back as you all watch them either perform on stage, or in a crowd during their tour. Each time, each performance, each interview, you find yourself drawn to Jimin. You hang off his every one of his words, almost squealing when he speaks English perfectly. He’s improved a lot, you note.

You find yourself enraptured by the way his body moves when he dances, each and every movement perfectly calculated. He’s incredibly graceful, moves with the fluidity of water and the sensuality of a seasoned salsa dancer. You’re completely mesmerised by him, your eyes always trained on him, no matter who is speaking. And after they’re done, you find even more of your time being taken up by him. The two of you tire of constantly eleventh and twelfth wheeling, so you find yourself spending more and more time together.

You have known Park Jimin for almost three years now. But it feels like you’re just getting to know him. He tells you about his love for dance, and how he used to excel in school, always the top of his class. You believe everything he tells you because you can see it. He’s always been a perfectionist, always wanting to better himself and somehow it just makes sense that he was a studious person. He tells you about his previous dream of being a police officer and changing the world for the better. You tell him he’s doing more to change the world as a member of BTS than he could have done as a police officer. He blushes, but you know it’s the truth. You wouldn’t lie. Not to him.

Another week later, and the comeback season is finally done, the boys getting to rest for a while before they have to do anything else. That is why you find yourself on the beach on Jeju Island. Everyone is here, Seokjin and Hoseok playing in the water with Suri and Sooji while Jungkook tries to drag Yoongi into the water; the Maknae very easily picking him up and throwing him over his shoulder until Yoongi has no option but to get wet, much to his chagrin. Taehyung and Hae have gone on a short walk down the coastline, Taehyung wanting to explore and find some scenery to practice his photography. A little further away from you are Sooyun and Namjoon, the two walking the rocky tidal zone looking for crabs.

Besides you sits Jimin. He’s the epitome of relaxed, dressed in some boardshorts and a loose short sleeved t-shirt, he lounges against the picnic blanket, body stretched out and legs crossed. He’s leaning on his elbow, wind rustling through his hair but he doesn’t care. His focus completely fixated on the book he’s reading, his eyes darting across the pages. Before you know what you’re doing, you’re once against studying him, your gaze intense as you take in every single detail of him.

“Is there something you need?” Jimin asks, his gaze flicking up to you and you let out a little gasp when you lock eyes. He’s smiling mischievously, the corners of his eyelids crinkling. But it’s the colour of his eyes that have you gasping, the usually earthy irises catch the sun at the perfect angle, causing them to lighten into a beautiful warm honey colour that draws you in. Vaguely, at the back of your mind, you think it feels like sunshine and home.

“I- what?” You ask, slightly dazed. His booming laugh is like being doused by cold water down your back and you shake your head slightly, snapping out of your reverie.

“You’ve been staring at me for the past fifteen minutes, is there something on my face?” Jimin asks curiously, but you recognise the teasing tone. Your skin flushes and you feel your ears burn from embarrassment.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realise. I was just lost in my own thoughts” You murmured, looking away causing him to laugh at you again.

“That’s alright, you were probably blinded by my handsomeness. Wow, I sound like Jin-hyung” Jimin teased before catching himself, looking perturbed at the thought of becoming like Seokjin. You supress a small squeak, because even though he was joking, he had hit the nail on the head. You wereblinded by how handsome he was.

“Hey, you wanna go get some ice cream? It’s so hot, I feel like cooling down” Jimin asked all of a sudden as he spots the small café nearby and you nodded, accepting his invitation. Jimin quickly asks everyone if they’d want ice cream, but everyone refuses and so the two of you find yourself walking in a comfortable silence.

“Hey! Can I get a chocolate scoop for me and a cookie and cream, for ____? Oh, in a waffle cone! She loves waffle cones” Jimin requests kindly when you get to the little café. Your head snaps to him in amazement, his smile bright as he hands you the ice cream.

“Why are you looking at me like that?” Jimin asks, leading you to a table before helping you into the seat.

“You remembered my ice cream order and the fact that even though they’re really messy, I love waffle cones” You reply shyly, Jimin shrugging as if it wasn’t a big deal.

“I know more about you than you realise” Jimin says cheekily, a small knowing smile on his face. Your eyebrow quirks in response as you feed yourself some ice cream.

“Oh really? Like what?” You taunt, and Jimin chuckles.

“I know you hate Jin-hyung’s beef” Jimin deadpans and you choke on your ice cream, looking at him wide eyed.

“W-W-What makes you say that? I’ve never said anything bad about his beef” You cough and Jimin rolls his eyes, eyes dancing with mirth.

“You don’t have to. You find it dry and I can tell because you either always avoid his beef, saying you prefer pork when I know for a factyou hate pork, or you always seem to drink an entire litre of water when you eat his beef” Jimin explains knowingly and you try to supress a blush, but the sudden heat around your cheeks lets you know you fail.

“Please don’t tell him! I love Jin’s cooking, really. It’s just he tends to overcook the beef” You sigh, shoulders deflating and Jimin lets out a gentle laugh.

“Don’t worry your secret is safe with me” Jimin winks and you feel your heart flutter. You almost want to point out that he says he can’twink but you stop yourself.

“So, you know I don’t like Jin’s beef and somehow you know that I hate pork. What else does thePark Jimin know about me?” You ask curiously.

“Hmmm, good question. But that would reveal all my cards” Jimin says with a teasing smirk and you pout, letting out a soft whine.

“Aish, how can I refuse when you’re being so cute?” Jimin asks fondly and you immediately blush, looking down shyly at his compliment.

“Well, what else do I know about you? Well for starters I know you can’t sing” Jimin jokes and this time, you flush out of embarrassment, especially when he starts laughing.

“Hey! Not everyone has an angelic fucking voice” You grumble, crossing your arms and glaring at him. Really? How could he just mock you like that?

“Aish, don’t get so offended. It’s okay. Not everyone can but I know you took singing lessons because you love to sing. I also know you have ridiculous stage fright, but that doesn’t stop you singing. I like it when you sing” Jimin confesses and you scrunch your eyebrows in confusion.

“I can’t sing, as you so nicely pointed out” You pout and he nods before looking at you earnestly.

“Yes, but I still like it when you do. Because you only do it when you’re completely comfortable around the person you’re with, or when you think you’re alone. I like when you sing in the shower most. Don’t get me wrong, you’re tone deaf and really loud. Like reallyloud. Almost screaming. But it means you’re comfortable and relaxed, I like that. Sometimes you even sing around me without realising and it makes me happy” Jimin admits and you find yourself unable to control your blushing, mumbling out an apology. But he stops you, stating that he loves your voice, tone deaf and all. You pout slightly, sticking your tongue out at him and he laughs, his voice echoing across the almost deserted beach.  Once he’s done laughing at your misfortune, he continues, revealing everything he knows about you. And it’s a lot.

He tells you about how he can tell when you dislike something just from the way your nose slightly scrunches. He tells you that he’s noticed the small dimples on your cheeks, ones that almost never show because they’re not as prominent as Namjoon or Hoseok’s. He tells you he loves your dimples, because not only do they match his, but because whenever he sees them, he knows that you’re happy as they only show when you’re smiling really hard. He admits that he knows white lilies are your favourite flower, and that he was the one who sent bouquets of them to your house every week for two months after they put your dog down. He admits that he himself cried when he found out, wishing he could have been there to comfort you but knowing you would have wanted your space.

He tells you that he knows you love to fish, and that it was one of your favourite childhood memories, summers filled with boat rides out on a lake with your grandfather. He also knows that while you love to fish, you can never bring yourself to kill them and therefore always set them free, your grandfather scolding you lovingly for being too soft. He also admits that he knows you cried once again for two straight months after said grandfather passed away and how he wished he could make it so you wouldn’t ever lose anyone you loved again.

He continues revealing little details he knows about you and the two of you talk until the sun begins setting. You sit, completely enraptured as you listen to him list of little quirks and characteristics. You had never had anyone pay so much attention to you; never had anyone who knew you almost better than you know yourself. When he’s finally down, you have no words. So instead, you just look at him, eyes filled with words you simply cannotexpress.

You take in the sight of him, almost radiant with the beautiful backdrop of the setting sun. He glows a beautiful shade of amber, the light forming almost a halo around him. He looks relaxed, smiling at you with a slight tilt to his head.

And suddenly your chest lurches.

You let out a small gasp, bending over, clutching a hand to your chest as you breathe deeply. Vaguely, you hear Jimin jump out of his seat, rushing to your side; trying to make sure you’re okay. But you can’t respond. Instead, you close your eyes, wincing at the tell-tale stinging feel of tears as a sharp pain flares between your ribs. You let out a choked sob when your chest tightens, the pressure becoming almost too much. It felt like something was squeezing your lungs and wrapping around your heart.

“____! ____! Are you okay? What’s wrong” Jimin asks, shaking you slightly and after a couple more moments the sensation begins ebbing from a searing pain to a dull ache. You take in a deep breath, finally able to breathe again. You open your eyes, blinking away the tears before swallowing thickly.

“I’m fine, it’s okay. I don’t know what happened” You reply, your throat raspy and Jimin’s face contorts into a look of worry.

“I think we should get you to the hospital” Jimin says but you quickly shake your head.

“No! I’m okay really, it’s probably nothing. Don’t worry” You reply, sending him a small smile and Jimin goes to argue, but quickly stops himself, nodding at you tersely.

For the third time, you completely ignore the obvious warning.

You fail to realise that the seeds of love have deeply rooted into your chest.

Bud

def. form a growth for development into a flower

It’s two weeks after your trip to Jeju with the boys when you get a text from Jimin. You’ve been speaking almost non-stop the past two weeks, flirty texts making up the majority of your interactions. But you don’t think much of it, especially as you know Jimin’s a big flirt. You ignore the slight clench of your heart when his name pops up on your phone screen, instead unlocking your phone and opening up his latest message.

Jiminie: hey, you busy?

You: not particularly, what’s up?

Jiminie: I found this cute little ramen place about a ten-minute walk from your home. How quickly can you get here?

You: lmao, king of last-minute plans Park Jimin strikes again, I can be with you in twenty-minutes, are you already there?

Jiminie: you know it princess ;) I’ll grab us a table! Hurry, can’t wait to see you xo

You bite your lip, trying and failing to suppress your oncoming grin. You quickly begin getting dressed before rushing out of your apartment. You check your phone, using maps to navigate to the location Jimin had messaged you. Eventually, you find the place. A cute little family run restaurant, covered in brown wood with comfy cream booths and warm, low lighting. You quickly enter, locating Jimin fairly easily.

He’s tucked away in the corner, dust mask and black beanie on his head, light blue hair poking out; most likely worn in order to prevent anyone recognising him. You take in a deep breathe, smoothing out your wind swept hair and the non-existent wrinkles from your dress before nervously approaching him.

You’ve hung out with Jimin a lot lately, but this is the first time it’s felt so intimate. The atmosphere of the restaurant and the low lighting does nothing to help your nerves. A voice at the back of your head wonders if this is a date, and for a split second you entertain the thought before quashing it down. There was no way Park Jimin, Prince of Busan, would everask you on a date. You were just friends.

“Jimin-ah, hey!” You say, smiling brightly before sliding in opposite him. Jimin immediately perks up, back straightening as he pulls down his dust mask until it rests under his chin. The action does nothing but bring attention to his particularly soft cheeks, making your heart soften slightly.

“____! Hey, wow you look pretty!” Jimin compliments enthusiastically and you feel your ears heat up, shaking your head before opening your mouth to protest.

“Hey, no look at me” Jimin says, cutting you off and you your head stills, eyes locking with his, “I mean it, you look pretty, you always do” Jimin says earnestly. You take in a short, silent breath at the deep honesty in his eyes and words before ducking your head slightly, thanking him quietly.

“So, what’s good here?” You ask, changing the conversation and looking at the menu.

“To be honest, I don’t know. I just saw the place while I was walking by and remembered how much you loved ramen, so I invited you out. I think you mentioned wanting to try this place out a while ago but I’m not sure” Jimin replies with a shrug. Once again, you find yourself astounded by how much he knows about you, because you hadwanted to try this place and hadmentioned it… over a year ago. In fact, even you’d forgotten about it. But he had remembered, and you couldn’t help but feel touched by how thoughtful Jimin really could be.

“Well, I’ve heard the spicy chicken ramen with bok choy is good, we can try that” You suggest and Jimin nods.

“Whatever you want, I’m fine with. Oh! These are for you. The last time I sent you flowers was when your grandad died and before that was when your dog died. I thought maybe I had to rectify that. Can’t have all the flowers I send you be due to grief” Jimin says with a wink, handing you a bouquet of red roses and white lilies. Once again, a voice nags at the back of your head, because friendsdon’t treat each other like this. Friends don’t remember the restaurant you wanted to try a year ago, friendsdon’t buy you bouquets of your favourite flowers for no reason, and friendsdon’t flirt like Park Jimin does with you. But that’s exactly what you are. Friends.

“Oh wow, they’re beautiful. Thank you” You say, floored by the emotion bubbling in your chest. You take the bouquet from him, inhaling deeply, basking in the sweet scent of the roses and musky, heady scent of the lilies.

“Just like you” Jimin says once again with a wink and you almost have the mind to call him out for his constant lies about not being able to wink. But you don’t. Because you don’t want to ruin the moment. So instead, you fall into an easy conversation, talking about your days, the different projects the boys are running and more.

At some point, you order ramen but by the time it arrives the two of you are so absorbed in your conversation, you completely forget that the main reason you had come to the restaurant was because you had wanted to try the ramen in the first place. The two of you are barely eating, slurps of ramen few and far between the easy banter between the two of you. You feel completely comfortable with him, to the point where you don’t mind when a bit of soup dribbles down his chin or when you snort out of laughter, choking on some noodles.

By the time you’re done, it’s late at night and the two of you have exhausted any available conversation. But the silence isn’t awkward; instead you sit completely comfortably, just basking in the presence of each other. When you’re ready to leave, Jimin pays the bill, refusing to let you pay with a slight glare.

The two of you leave the restaurant, walking into the crisp late spring night. He walks you home, shoulders slightly bumping into each other as you walk, hands brushing against each other’s. Before you know it, you’re back at your apartment building and you regret how close the restaurant is to your apartment. You turn to Jimin, smiling shyly up at him. For the first time, you notice his height. He’s not particularly tall compared to the other boys, but he’s a good few inches taller than you.

Jimin smiles brightly at you before pulling you into a hug. You’re slightly surprised, although you’re not sure why because Jimin has hugged you goodbye countless of times before. This time however, it feels different. Somehow, he feels warmer, his touch feels more intimate. You bury your head into his neck ever so slightly, breathing the deep musky scent of his cologne over the tell-tale natural smell of chocolate and coffee that belonged solely to Jimin. Your arms automatically wrap around his neck, while his wrap around your waist and you simply stand in that position. At some point, you think he takes in a deep breath, nose buried in your hair. But you think you’ve imagined it. You’re unsure for how long you stand there, the street illuminated by the moon and soft glow street lamps, but all too soon, he’s pulling away giving you a soft smile before beckoning you upstairs.

You blush slightly, glad for the cover of the night before waving and walking away. You’re slightly dazed, his intoxicating scent still clouding your mind and before long, you’re in your apartment. You can’t even recollect even climbing the stairs, no opening your door. Rather than pondering it however, you begin getting ready for bed, a soft smile playing on your lips as you remember the night’s events instead. When you replay the hug in your mind however, you feel slightly choked up.

You begin coughing suddenly, wondering why it feels like something bulbous is lodged in the back of your throat. All of a sudden, you begin coughing violently, your throat raw as you try to dislodge whatever is stuck in your throat. Your eyes burn with tears but no matter how hard you cough, it simply won’t budge. You panic slightly and rush to the kitchen, pouring yourself a glass of water before chugging it down.

You feel it go down slightly and quickly pour yourself a second before gulping that down too. Relief washes over you when it finally dislodges and you breathe deeply, hand on your throat, trying to soothe the slightly raw flesh with soft rubs. You’re unsure as to what happened, but you chalk it up to a freak accident. And looking back, you wished you had realised sooner. You wish you had noticed the signs early on.

But you don’t.

Instead as usual you stay oblivious to the flowers of love budding deep within your chest.

Effloresce

def. reach an optimal stage of development; bloom/blossom

It’s another week later when you find yourself standing in the Bangtan household once again. You haven’t been here since New Year’s Eve but now summer is on the horizon, the spring blossoms giving way to the summer blooms. Once again, you find yourself alone with Jimin. Tonight, is one of the last nights that the boys have off before being thrust back into their hectic schedule. Your best friends take advantage and drag their respective boyfriends out on dates in order to spend quality time with them.

Which is why you find yourself sitting next to Jimin on the sofa, your back against his chest and head resting in the crook of his shoulder as you both sip your wine, watching whatever Korean Drama that was playing. If you were being honest, you stopped paying attention after your third glass of wine. Although, your lack of attention had more to do with Jimin’s hands moving from your waist to your hips, drawing lazy circles on the slight exposed skin rather than the alcohol.

You shift yourself slightly, trying to distract yourself from his seemingly innocent ministrations but all you achieve is brushing the soft of your ass against his hardened, thick thighs and crotch. Jimin lets out an involuntary moan and your breath hitches when his fingers grip your waist tightens, fingers pressing into the flesh of your hips. His head falls into the crook of your neck, soft lips brushing against the hot skin of your neck.

“Tell me to stop” Jimin breathes against your skin and you let out a shudder at the want in his voice. You’ve barely done anything and he’s just as breathless as you are.

“Tell me to stop or I won’t until this ends” Jimin whispers against and your throat goes dry at his words, his lips continue caressing your skin, pressing light kisses against the column of your throat.

If you’re being completely honest, it’s hard to think right now. But all you know is that you don’t wantto stop. You should.By god do you know that you should.This was certainly crossing boundaries and you were both walking into unchartered territory. It was wrong and you had no idea how this would affect your relationship. But you didn’t want to stop. You wanted him to pick you up and carry you to his room before leaving you nothing but a quivering mess. So instead you press your hips further into his, straining your neck and giving him better access.

“Please don’t” You almost beg and Jimin groans against your skin.

“What do you want Princess?” Jimin asks, tongue swiping against the shell of your ear before sucking purple flowers against the sensitive skin just under your earlobe.

“You” is your only answer and Jimin immediately flips you over so you’re under him, smashing his lips against yours. As soon as you feel his lush lips against yours, you feel time stop. All you comprehend is the deep scent of him that clouds your sense and the sensation of his lips against yours. His tongue presses against your lips, begging for entrance and you allow it, your lips parting before moaning as your tongues entangle.

One of his hands trails down your side to your thigh before hooking it around his hips, his other hand bracing himself above you. His hips between your parted legs start moving, slowly grinding against your heat. You let out a strangled cry against his lips at the stimulation; your hands moving to his ass, gripping them as you tried to pull him closer to alleviate the heat between your legs.

“Fuck you’re so hot Princess” Jimin whispers against your lips when you finally part, looking down at your through lidded eyes. His lips moved to press soft kisses against your throat before trailing down to the slight exposed skin between your collar, on the pendant of the necklace he’d gifted you for Christmas. Deft fingers begin unbuttoning your shirt, his lips brushing and nipping at the skin slowly being exposed until he reaches the waistband of your jeans. He pulls you up so that you’re sitting up before pushing your shirt of you, his hands pressing against your back and pulling you flush against his chest as he kisses you senseless once again.

His hands quickly undo the clasp of your bra before removing it from your body, head dipping down to the valley of your breasts, lips sweeping against the soft globes before wrapping his lips around your nipple, laving until it hardens, suckling on the teat. Your hands move to his hair, tugging the locks as you push him further into your breast, whimpering above him. His hands move to your hips once again before he shifts so his back is against the sofa, your legs straddling him. Your hands move to the hem of his t-shirt, Jimin breaking away from your breast so you could divest him of his shirt before his lips attach to your other nipple.

While he continues lavishing attention upon your breasts, your hands dance against his shoulders, bracing yourself as you begin grinding down on his member. Jimin hisses against your chest as you smirk. You continue your actions, heat pressed right against his hardened shaft as you move slowly, drawing soft whimpers from the male. You tug at his hair making him detach from your breast before you get up, shimmying out of your jeans and underwear until you’re completely naked. Jimin’s eyes darken until they’re almost black, his gaze slowly trailing down every curve of your body before resting between your thighs, arousal dripping down the soft flesh.

“Damn, you’re so beautiful, come here Princess” Jimin calls peering up at you as he pulls you closer by the hips, one hand moving between your thighs and cupping your sex. You buck against his hand, throwing your head back with a soft cry as one of his thick fingers slides through your slit, parting the lips before pressing into your honeyed hole. He moans at the tight heat encasing his digits as he pumps into you slowly, stretching your walls. He pulls his hand away, groaning as a string of your arousal attaches to his fingers. His digits are completely soaked and you watch through lust filled eyes, gazes locked on each other as he flicks his tongue out, licking at the coating of slick on his fingers.

“Is that all for me Angel?” Jimin asks, tongue swirling around his finger.

“All for you baby boy” You replied with a nod, a playful smirk on your lips as you crawl back into his lap. Except this time, your legs are on either side of his left thigh. You decide you’ve had enough of being passive and lower your heat onto his jeans, groaning at the rough material against your sensitive clit. Jimin’s hands move to your hip and you tut, removing them off you before pinning them against the couch.

“Uh-uh baby boy, did I say you could touch? No, I want you to watch as I get off using your thighs” You mumble into his ear, pulling his earlobe between your teeth as you nibble on the soft flesh. He whimpers under you but obliges, a complete flip from the dominating personality he was showcasing earlier. You begin grinding against his thigh, throwing your head back and moaning as you stimulate yourself. Jimin can feel your searing heat on his thigh, his jeans quickly darkening with your dripping arousal.

“Fuck, you look so good” Jimin compliments, eyes trained on where your sex meets his thighs, watching in rapt fascination as the darkened patch gets darker and darker. You quiver above him, sucking in sharp but shaky breaths as you grind against him hard. Your fingers move to the nape of his neck, entangling in the thick locks there as you continued moving above him. Suddenly he begins flexing his thigh and you let out a soft shriek, as you’re stimulated further by the hardness of his muscles.

“Are you gonna cum for me Princess? Are you gonna cum and make a mess of my jeans? Look at them, they’re completely soaked but you can do better can’t you?” Jimin asks from under you and you tug at his hair, hissing slightly at him. He’s trying to take back dominance with his dirty talk and you’re having none of it. So instead, you locate the imprint of his dick, hard and straining against his jeans before sitting down until your pussy is pressed against his tip. Jimin lets out a whine and you smirk above him, sliding your cunt up and down his thigh, clit brushing against the head of his dick ever so slightly. You know it’s torturous, you can tell by the way he begins bucking underneath you, mewling softly.

“Be a good boy and play with my clit baby” You whimper above him, and Jimin immediately obliges, hand pressed against your abdomen as his thumb prods into your clit, rolling the bundle of nerves in hard, tight circles. You cry above him, throwing your head back and arching your back as you begin shuddering. Heat swells in the pit of your stomach, your thighs shaking on either side of Jimin’s. The coil of pleasure snaps when Jimin pinches your clit, bending over and taking your nipple back into his mouth. All of a sudden, your nerves are electrified with pleasure, toes curling from strength of your orgasm, thighs shaking as you cry in euphoria. Your body goes slack and you fall, unable to hold yourself up.

“Shhh, it’s okay Princess, you’re okay” Jimin says into your chest, his head between your breast. He catches you quickly before you can fall, arms wrapping around your waist as he holds you to him. Jimin presses soothing kisses into your shoulder, holding your trembling body as he rubs your back, waiting for you to come down from your high.

“Fuck me” You beg through laboured breaths. Your cunt continues clenching around nothing, your pussy sopping and dripping with your cum as you drench his jeans. They’re probably beyond repair at this point, considering how wet they are.

“Are you sure Princess? Will you be able to handle it?” Jimin asks in concern, not wanting to overstimulate you, but you couldn’t care less. Your heat aches, needing to be filled and you’re sure if he doesn’t fuck you, you’re going to lose your mind.

“Please Jimin, fuck me” You plead once again and immediately Jimin growls, he flips you over so your back is pressed against the couch. You pull your legs up, bracing your feet against the edge of the sofa as you spread your legs wide. Jimin groans at the sight, quickly undoing his jeans before pushing both them and his boxers off of his figure. You bite your lip when his dick is finally revealed, his of average length but absolutely thickand wet; drippingwith precum. You watch through a lustful haze as he pumps his member, wetting his dick with his own precum.

He shifts forward rubbing the head of his cock between your lips and making you moan, bucking your heat against him. He manoeuvres his dick until the head is pressing into you. You let out a soft whine when he pushes into you, hands moving to his shoulders, nails digging into the flesh, face scrunching up at the stretch. He’s impossibly thick and it feels like he’s splitting you open, his hard shaft fucking your walls open, forcing them to stretch and accommodate him. You breathe deeply, biting your lip until you draw blood as you feel him finally bottom out.

“Fucking shit, you’re so tight. I should have stretched you, I’m sorry Princess” Jimin says, bending over and kissing your closed eyes as he stills, waiting for you to adjust to the size of him.

“Fuck, it’s so full. Move Jimin, fuck me hard” You plead and Jimin lets out a soft growl, his hands move to your hips, fingers digging into your hipbones before pushing them down into the couch, holding you still. He pulls out before thrusting back in, in one swift motion before he begins rutting into you. You gasp, hands moving from his shoulders to wrap around his neck, clutching on desperately as he wrecks you underneath him.

“Don’t worry Princess, I’ll fuck this pretty little pussy open until you can’t walk anymore” Jimin grits out, punctuating each of his words with a hard thrust. His hips move in tantalising ways, his dancer’s hips aiding his motions.

“Shit, look at you. Look at that pussy stretching around my thick cock. You take my dick so well baby” Jimin praises, his eyes trained on the sight of his cock moving in and out of your cunt. You clench at his words, feeling your orgasm building once again and Jimin whines as you tighten further.

“Fuck, are you cumming again already baby? Gonna soak my cock in your cum?” Jimin asks and you nod underneath him, hands on his neck as you pull him down for a sloppy kiss. Your lips move against each other as he continues fucking himself into you.

“Play with your clit for me Princess, let me see you get off” Jimin urges against your lips, his eyes watching as one of your hands moves to play with your clit. You rub your sensitive bundle of nerves, thighs shaking once again as you feel your orgasm approaching.

“Shit… just like that baby, that’s so hot” Jimin groans as you begin shuddering under him, gasping for air as he fucking harder into you.

“I’m close… Jimin I’m so close please” You cry, tears pooling in your eyes.

“Cum. Cum for me Angel” Jimin orders and immediately your body seizes up, muscles locking as you cry out his name, thighs shaking and pussy quivering around him as your walls tighten. Jimin continues fucking into you, despite how tight you get, one of his hands joining yours as you both play with your clit.

“Jimin! FUCK” You scream and suddenly you cum, gushing around him and soaking his cock, tears streaming down your cheeks. He continues thrusting into you, loud squelching noises filling the air as your skin slaps against each other.

“Shit. Shit. Shit I’m cumming. Let me cum in you baby” Jimin pleads and you have no energy to respond, so you simply nod, silently pleading with him to finish and cease his assault of unadultered pleasure on your body.

“Fuck, ____” Jimin whines and then you feel his cum splash into you, coating your walls white with his thick semen. You groan, quivering underneath him as Jimin places soft kisses against your collarbone, slowly pumping his cum into you before stilling when the stimulation becomes painful. The two of you stay like that for a couple moments, coming down from your high before Jimin goes soft, pulling out of you. As soon as he pulls out, you feel him begin to drip out of you, groaning at the sensation.

“Damn, we made a mess. Hold on” Jimin says before standing up and walking into the kitchen. You stay where you are, unable to move, staring up at the ceiling. You had just fucked Park Jimin. Holy shit. What would happen now? Before you can overthink anything however, Jimin returns with a wet cloth as he slowly begins cleaning you up. When he’s done he returns to the kitchen to chuck the cloth into the washing machine before coming back to you. He peers at your completely fucked out form, breath still laboured and skin flushed.

“Can you walk?” Jimin asks and you don’t have it in you to answer, so you simply shake your head no. Jimin chuckles before approaching you and picking you up before carrying you to his room. He carefully places you on the bed before drawing the covers over you.

“I need to clean up the living room before everyone gets home. Get some rest” Jimin says softly and you nod before turning to your side, curling up as you drift off into sleep.

It’s a couple hours later when you wake up with a soft groan. The night’s events replay in your mind and you immediately sit up, wincing slightly when your sore body protests. You turn to your side, heart plummeting in your chest when you realise Jimin isn’t in his bed. You turn to the side, realising your clothes are neatly folded on the bed side table with your phone on the top. Your heart gripes at the sight. Did he want you to leave? You and Jimin had shared a bed before when you’d crashed after a long night with everyone. So why hadn’t he slept next to you after fucking you?

Did he want nothing to do with you anymore? Had you ruined your friendship? You had no idea. So instead, you quickly get out of bed, trying to ignore the ache in your muscles and between your legs as you quickly get dressed. You can feel tears pool in your eyes and you quickly rub them before slapping your cheeks, trying to get a hold of yourself. You grab your phone before you slowly begin sneaking out. When you’re leaving, you notice Jimin on the sofa, fast asleep and once again your heart breaks all over again. Had he really chosen the sofa over sharing a bed with you?

Fuck. You had to get out of here.

You tiptoe out of the Bangtan household, slowly shutting the door before quickly walking away. It’s almost 5am so you quickly call an Uber wanting nothing more than to be home and in bed. You embrace the chill of the summer night, the cool air distracting you from traitorous thoughts of Park Jimin.

You only wait a couple minutes before your Uber picks you up. You quickly slide into the car, arms wrapping around yourself as you will yourself not to cry. You’d had one night stands before so you have no idea why your heart feels like it’s breaking all over the place. Tears burn at your eyes and you choke out a sob, as you remember Jimin’s peaceful sleeping figure on the sofa. He’d obviously thought sleeping with you was a mistake, otherwise he’d have been in bed with you.

Suddenly, your sobs turn into choked cries as you begin coughing. You cough violently, your throat scratching as you feel something come up. The driver looks at you in question but you ignore him as you cough particularly hard. And then, it dislodges from your throat and falls into your hand.

But you wish it hadn’t.

You let out a small sniffle before breaking out into a full-blown sob, your sorrowful cries filling the car, your hand clutching desperately around the petal in your palm. The driver looks at you in alarm but you continue ignoring him.

You wish you had stayed oblivious.

Because then you wouldn’t know about your feelings for Park Jimin and you could brush it off as a one-night stand. But you can’t. Not now. All of a sudden, all the chest pains and coughing fits make sense. You think back to all the times your chest ached at the thought of Park Jimin, back to the first night on Christmas. You wish you had realised soon. But it’s too late now.

Because there in your hand, is a blood-stained white lily petal.

And now you know.

You know that the seeds of your unrequited love for Park Jimin have effloresced.

Wilt

def. become limp

It’s five months before you see Jimin again. After that night, you do your best to avoid him as best as you can. It’s not difficult as the boys are midst another comeback. You’re further aided by their world tour and hence, you are Jimin free for a few short blissful months. You try your best to forget him, but the constant ache in your chest lets you know that your feelings for him are undeniable. Each day the symptoms get worse and worse. As each day goes by, you’re coughing up more and more petals. A morbid side of you decides to clean the petals and dry them out, placing them in a jar. A handful of petals for each day you love him.

Today is the first time you’ll be seeing him in a while. The boys have finished their leg of the European part of the world tour and are due back in Seoul before starting the Asian part and you’re beyond nervous. But there’s no way you can avoid him tonight, because it’s Sooji’s birthday and you know for a fact that she’ll kill you before you even think of missing it. You’re beyond nervous, butterflies swimming in the pits of your belly and you feel like you may just throw up. Your phone rings and you pick up, taking a deep breath before answering.

“____! Are you ready? Sooyun, Suri and I are coming to pick you up” Hae asks and you groan slightly.

“Yeah, I’m ready” You whisper back, but it’s a lie and you know it is. Because you’re notready. You don’t think you’ll ever be ready to face Jimin after he so sneakily rejected you.

“Hey, you sound upset. What’s wrong?” Hae asks and you bite your lip, attempting to stifle the sob in your throat. You shake your head, trying to get a grip of your feelings.

“Nothing, I’m okay” You stutter back and Hae tuts disapprovingly and you know that she’s seen through the blatant lie despite being on the phone.

“You’re not. What’s going on? You’ve been avoiding all of us. You didn’t even come on tour with the boys, we were supposed to see Europe together, all five of us” Hae says quietly and you almost feel guilty. It hadbeen suspicious when you declined an all-expenses paid trip around America, Canada and Europe. But you couldn’t. You couldn’t stomach being around Jimin for months, surrounded by beautiful cities and pretend you felt nothing for him. So, you had graciously declined, making up an excuse about work.

“I’m sorry, I’ve just been really busy” You lie through your teeth. Because there was no way you’d be able to confess that you’d slept with Jimin and were in love with him. You especially couldn’t bring yourself to tell her or any of them that the love was unrequited and as a result you had developed the Hanahaki disease, an illness that was slowly consuming your lifeforce and killing you in the most painful, heart-breaking way. You couldn’t tell them that he had bloomed beautiful florets of love in the midst of your lungs before leaving them to decay. Because if Hae knew, then Sooyun and the girls would know and then Hoseok and Namjoon would also know and they’d probably force Jimin into doing something he regretted. But you couldn’t have that. You didn’t want him to love you out of pity. You just wanted his happiness. Even if that happiness wasn’t with you.

“Listen ____, I can’t force you to tell me what’s wrong. If you don’t wanna speak about it, that’s okay. But don’t shut us out” Hae pleads and once again your heart grips with guilt.

“I know I’m sorry. I’ll try and be better. Thanks for understanding Hae” You whisper back.

“Anytime. Now, we should be with you soon, so let’s just have some fun tonight okay. It’s not every day that Sooji turns 24 so let’s forget about everything else yeah?” Hae says and despite yourself, you chuckle.

“Sure, let’s do it” You respond before hanging up. You take in a deep breath and look at yourself in the mirror, your eyes steeling with resolve. You won’t let tonight break you. You’re going out and you’re going to enjoy yourself and Park Jimin be damned because there was no way you’d be ruining your best friend’s 24thbirthday. You quickly fix your make up and once you’re done, the girls are at your door, grinning and thrusting a bottle of wine in your hand. You let out your own grin before taking a swig, Hae rolling her eyes before pouting.

“I hate that I can’t drink because I’m on call and because I’m your damn designated driver” Hae pouts and the three of you laugh. The four of you quickly get into the car and before you know it, you’re standing on a rooftop bar, overlooking the beautiful Seoul skyline. It’s mid November and the air is chilly but the party is in full swing and with the amount of people bustling about, the body heat swirling around the atmosphere keeps you warm enough.

“____! You’re here! God it feels like I haven’t seen you in forever” Sooji squeals before running up to you, hugging you tightly. Her words are true because you haven’t seen her in months considering she was touring the world with the boys and once again you feel guilt for neglecting your best friends.

“Sorry, I promise to be better. Happy birthday!” You wish cheerily and Sooji grins brightly, Yoongi and Seokjin smiling on either side of her. You greet the both of them before Suri drags you away to grab some more drinks. For the first time in months, you let out a real life, letting the girls drag you around. You meet each of the boys, striking up a small conversation with each of them. Jimin is far from your mind and your thankful for such amazing friends.

You think you may actually have a fun night.

You’re in the middle of a conversation with Hae and Taehyung, speaking about how much Taehyung enjoyed Europe, especially the various art galleries and even going to his favourite artist’s art exhibit. You’re thoroughly enjoying yourself. Taehyung has always had the most beautiful mind and his love for art and culture is almost unparalleled. However, all thoughts are ruined when you hear Taehyung let out a small groan, eyes narrowing behind you as Hae herself tuts. You wonder what’s got them both so annoyed and turn around, your eyes widening when Jimin enters the rooftop bar.

But he’s not alone.

“Can you believe he brought her here?” Hae lets out a moan, glaring openly at the girl next to Jimin.

“I honestly didn’t think he would. I thought he knew better than that. If Sooyun-ah finds her, she’ll go mad” Taehyung responds but you can barely hear them through the cloudy haze of your mind. Jimin immediately spots you and the two of you lock eyes, his own widening slightly. Time slows down and it’s as if the both of you are the only ones present on the beautiful lit up bar, surrounded by Sooji’s favourite flowers. It’s kind of fitting.

However, the moment is broken up immediately when the girl starts clinging onto Jimin. His gaze snaps away from yours and towards the girl tucked into his side. He looks down at her and she looks up at him, her eyes sparkling as if he’s the only man in the world. You can almost hear the sound of your heart break when he beams that  beautiful pearly white smile down at her, a smile that you wished was reserved for you and only you. Your eyes widen in fear slightly when they both start walking over to you. Your eyes dart around, trying to find a way to escape the inevitable, awkward conversation but before you can escape, Jimin and his new girl are already by your side.

“Hey, ____, I haven’t seen you in a while” Jimin says softly and you nod tersely, unsure what to say. But really, what could you? You had fucked five months ago and now here he was with another girl on his arms. Were you the only one affected by this? Clearly, considering he had so easily moved on to someone else. Then again, can you really move on from someone you only had sex with once, and had no feelings for?

“Hi Jimin, it has. I heard the tour went well, you guys did great” You comment easily, silently cheering at how steady your voice is. From the corner of your eyes you can see Hae narrow her own eyes, suspicious of the behaviour between the two of you. But you do your best to ignore her.

“Jimin-ah, who is this?” The girl asks and you cringe at the nasally, high pitch voiced. She was trying way too hard to be cute and you feel bad when you almost snicker as Taehyung fakes a gagging noise behind the girl’s back, Jimin glaring at his best friend.

“Ri-El, this is ____. ____ this is Ri-El, my date” Jimin responds thickly and you nod curtly, extending your hand to shake hers despite how much you want to run away from the situation. The five of you begin a conversation. Well, you say conversation when really, it’s just Ri-El talking at you, spewing nonsense and you’re not really sure what she’s talking about considering she’s changed topics at least five times within the same sentence. You hate that you find her annoying because she seems nice enough. But you can’t help but want to hate her, especially with how she clings to Jimin.

“Oh! Is that Taemin? The Taemin? I have to go say hi!” Ri-El finally finishes before running off like a star struck fan. The minute she’s gone, Sooyun stomps up to you guys, followed by her two boyfriends.

“Park Jimin! I cannotbelieve you brought her here” Sooyun hisses and Jimin immediately cringes. She’s younger than him, in fact, she’s the youngest out of all of you, Jungkook beating her by a couple of months. But that doesn’t mean that Jimin isn’t terrifiedof her, especially with the amount of times both she and Jungkook have pranked him for no reason other than the fact that he’s an easy target.

“Sooyun-ah please, she really wanted to come. I couldn’t say no” Jimin pleads and suddenly you wonder why the hell everyone seems to hate Ri-El so much.

“Jimin, you slept with her once! Once while on tour. Why are you suddenly so attached to her? Especially after she almost leaked your whereabouts to some ssaesangs” Sooyun hissed but you’d stopped listening by that point. He had slept with her. He had fucked her like he had fucked you and suddenly you felt like throwing up.

“She’s really nice once you get to know her, please Sooyun-ah” Jimin begs and you finally have had enough. He’s known her barely half a year and he’s already defending her after sleeping with her once, yet after knowing you for yearsand sleeping with you, he wants nothing to do with you? It’s more than your heart can take. Sooyun continues ripping into Jimin and you use the opportunity to make a quick escape.

“Hey guys, I’m going to grab another drink” You excuse yourself, your voice slightly quivering. It’s quiet and only Hae and Sooji notice, both of them looking at you in alarm, brows furrowing with concern. You shake your head at them before turning and walking away briskly. It takes every part of you to prevent yourself from running.

Once you’re far enough away from them you run out of the bar and into the bathroom, shutting yourself into a stall before dropping to the floor, head in your hands as you begin to cry into your knees. Your body wracks with sobs and you bite your lip to prevent yourself from being audible. You cry out when you feel a shift in your lungs, the roots in your chest tightening around your lungs before squeezing. You gasp out a breath, trying desperately to draw enough oxygen, but it’s counterproductive, causing the roots to grip tighter.

You wondered if love was always supposed to hurt like this. You hate him for planting his seeds into the garden of your chest before leaving them; letting them overgrow into a beautiful mess of nothing but weeds and thorns that encase your heart, which holds all the love you have for him. You try your hardest to weed them out, but the more you think about him, the stronger your chest aches, as if thoughts of him are the water your garden needs to continue growing.

For the second time in your life, you feel the familiar sensation of something bulbous stuck at the back of your throat. This time you don’t panic. Instead, you accept fate as you begin coughing, eyes tearing up as you continue gagging. You feel the bud slowly inch its way up your throat, slowly scratching its way up your oesophagus. When it finally dislodges you cough it out into the palm of your hand before breaking into another fit of sobs.

A wilted rose bud.

If petals were the first stage, you knew buds were the second stage.

There was no hope.

Your unrequited love for Park Jimin would be the death of you.

Wither

def. become dry or shrivelled

The next few times you see Jimin are probably the hardest. You can no longer avoid him without being suspicious, especially since you promised Hae you’d stop avoiding everyone. Hence, you see him more often than not and each time is worse than the other. He’s still dating Ri-El and every time you watch him interact with her, you can feel the thorned roots entangle further, gripping your lungs until you’re left breathless, lungs burning for air. It gets harder to breathe almost every day and you wonder how much longer you can survive this way.

There is a cure. You know there is. But you’re not sure if you can go through with it. Hanahaki is so rare that you’re not sure about the consequences. Some say you lose memories of the person you once loved, others say you just lose the love you had for them. Some even say that if you lose the flowers, you can never love the person again. Of course, there is the cure where the recipient of the feelings acknowledges and reciprocates, but you don’t have much hope for that. He seems happy with her and you can’t bear to come between that happiness. Even if it means death.

You’ve contemplated undergoing the surgery. But every time you think about it, you can’t seem to follow through. Despite every bit of hurt he’s caused you, you lovePark Jimin and you love your memories of him. You didn’t want to forget him, you didn’t want to not be able to love him ever again either. So, you reach an impasse, one that does worse for you than good considering you grow weaker every day. You look across your living room, to the shelf packed with glass jars filled to the brim with lily petals and rose buds.

Your love for Jimin had caused to you spew out flower petals and buds almost every day, slowly increasing in frequency as time passes. You wonder if maybe one day he’ll spot the jars and see the beautiful garden you had choked out, brought from both the pain and love he had caused you. You begin coughing again, the onslaught triggered by your thoughts of Jimin. You’re more than used to it now, it’s been more than half a year and you barely register the pain, wincing only slightly when the thorned rose stems scratch against the lining of your throat.

The last week, you had developed into the penultimate stage. Instead of simply choking out petals and buds, you were now throwing up entire flower stems. Your chances of survival were getting slimmer day by day and you knew that the final stage, throwing up entire bouquets, would mean your end. You scoff at yourself slightly, wondering when you’d become the type of person to die for love. But you would. You’d die if it meant preserving the happy memories of your love for Jimin.

You finally managed to choke out the flower, pulling out the withered rose before placing it in a vase along with the dozen other dead roses and lilies. As soon as you place it in the vase, there’s a knock at your door. Your brows furrow in question, wondering who that could be considering you weren’t expecting anyone. You answer your door, eyes widening when Hoseok, Namjoon and Sooyun smile brightly at you from the doorway.

“____! Hey, haven’t seen you in forever” Sooyun says as the three of them enter your apartment.

“We literally saw each other a couple days ago” You deadpan, wondering why the hell they were here.

“Woah, what’s with all the dead flowers?” Hoseok asks you, your childhood friend pointing at the dying bouquet on your countertop.

“Ah, I bought flowers a couple of weeks ago but I haven’t managed to throw them out. I completely forgot” You lie casually; he immediately raises an eyebrow at you and you know he’s caught your lie. But really, what else do you except from him? You’ve known each other since you were children, the two of you knew each other like the backs of your palms. There was nothing you could keep from each other.

“Uh huh, and what about those?” Hoseok asks, gesturing to the jars of petals and buds littering your shelves. You immediately stiffen, unsure of how to respond.

“____, what’s going on? We’re worried” Sooyun says softly and your mouth goes dry knowing you’ve been caught. You’re unsure of what to say, looking to Namjoon for help but he simply shakes his head, sending you his own worried glance.

“N-Nothing’s wrong” You try, stammering out your response and Sooyun sighs.

“Listen, I know we said we wouldn’t press if you didn’t want to talk about it. But this is getting ridiculous. Something is wrong, I know it, Seok knows it. Hell, even Joon noticed and you know he notices nothing. So, what’s going on?” Sooyun finally bursts out, looking at you for answers.

“What Sooyun is trying to say is that, we’re worried. You’ve lost so much weight, you look pale and you have these god-awful bags as if you haven’t slept in a month. Also, your voice is constantlyraspy, as if you’ve got the worst sore throat in the world and it’s been going on for too long. We just want to make sure you’re okay” Hoseok follows after his girlfriend, eyes brimming with concern.

“Is- is this about Jimin?” Sooyun questions ever so gently and your head snaps to her, eyes wide and from your reaction, you know she can tell that’s the exact issue.

“What happened? Don’t lie to me. Hae noticed something weird between the two of you at Sooji’s birthday and then recently you’ve been so awkward and stiff with each other. You used to spend so much time together before the last comeback and tour” Sooyun presses and you’re left stuttering. So they hadnoticed something, but just never said anything.

“I-I-” You stutter out, unsure of what to say. You can feel the flowers well up at the base of your throat and wonder if an attack is imminent. You take in a sharp breath when the roots move, constricting your airflow further.

“____? Are you okay? You don’t look so good” Namjoon says softly, placing a comforting hand on your shoulder. You let out a low whimper at the action and the soft touch is all it takes for the damn to burst. You begin sobbing, the weight of your emotions finally crashing as you sob your heart out. Namjoon jumps in alarm, Hoseok and Sooyun quickly rushing to you as the former pulls you in for a hug.

“I’m dying” You finally stutter out and everyone’s eyes widens at your confession.

“What? No. You’re not. Tell me you’re joking, please tell me you’re lying” Hoseok pleads, looking at you with tear filled eyes.

“You’re not dying. This is a prank, you’re pranking me to get back at Jeon and I because of all our pranks, right? This isn’t funny” Sooyun says, but her eyes are filled with fear and you know she’s two words from breaking apart.

“I am. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you sooner” You sob out and Sooyun lets out a little sob before crying softly with you.

“What? How? Why?” She stuttered out and you let out a rueful smile.

“I’m in love with Park Jimin. But he doesn’t love me, so I developed the Hanahaki disease. I’ve been keeping it a secret from everyone” You confess and Sooyun goes stiff, eyes wide while Namjoon sucks in a deep breath.

“You mean… the disease with the flowers? Is that where all the flowers came from?” Hoseok asks and you nod simply.

“Can’t… won’t it help if you get over him?” Sooyun asks softly and you shake your head, chuckling mirthlessly.

“I’ve tried. Believe me I’ve tried but my love for him is so deep that he’s planted within the dark recesses of my chest, the roots encasing my lungs. He makes roses bloom in my lungs and lilies blossom in my chest and granted they are beautiful but I cannot fucking breathe” You respond. You can already feel the early effects of an attack, flower buds at the top of your chest, ready to spill out your oesophagus due to the thoughts of him plaguing your mind. Once again you feel the roots constrict around your chest and you take in a sharp breath, before you begin choking.

“____? ____!” Hoseok calls in alarm but you push him away, instead heaving over. You begin gagging and this time, it’s unlike the times before. The flowers don’t come up as easily as they had before and you’re dry heaving. Tears sting at your eyes and you feel your throat burn, completely raw.

“Namjoon! Call the ambulance, we have to get her to a hospital” Sooyun calls frantically but you ignore the commotion surrounding you. You vaguely feel Hoseok’s presence behind you, rubbing and patting your back but it does little to help. You cry at the burn of the pain, sobs wracking your body as you claw at your throat, wondering why they won’t come out. It’s getting harder and harder to breathe and you wonder if this is how it ends.

Then Hoseok pats your back particularly hard and you lurch forward, retching out whatever was blocking your airway. Your eyes widen when dozens of flowers spew out your throat, blood stained and covered in saliva. There are enough flowers to create an entire bouquet, reminiscent of the one Jimin had given you when he’d taken you to the ramen restaurant.

You close your eyes, tears falling down your cheeks as you realise that you’ve reached stage four, the final one.

Then it goes dark.

Abscission

def. the natural detachment of parts of a plant

The next time you wake, all you see is a moving white ceiling. You turn around and notice that you’re on a hospital gurney, being rolled somewhere you have no idea. Sooyun, Hoseok and Namjoon are running behind while the doctors and nurses call out various codes that you can’t comprehend. In fact, there’s not much you can comprehend. You hear words like ‘critical’ and ‘surgery’ and wonder what is happening. And then you remember.

You remember heaving out an entire bouquet worth of flowers before it went dark. Ah. So you were on your way to surgery. They were going to remove the flowers and save you. You want to protest, but you don’t have the energy to do so. Namjoon is passive. His jaw is grit and you can tell he’s trying to keep calm and rational, always playing the role of the leader. Hoseok and Sooyun however, aren’t as calm. They’re both sobbing as they follow you into what you assume is the ER. Maybe this is for the best you think. Maybe if they operate and remove the flowers, you can go back to your normal life. You can forget Park Jimin and the love you had for him.

Your resolve shakes however, when you spot Park Jimin running up to you. He’s caught you just in time. He’s crying freely and you wonder why. You open your mouth, willing your body to say something, anything. If this is the last time you remember him, if this is the last time you remember your feelings for him. You want him to know. You want to thank him for being a beautiful human being and a wonderful friend, even if you had wanted more in the end.

“Jimin” You rasp out and he lets out a little sob, nodding as he grabs your hand. The nurses tut slightly, but allow you to continue. They probably know he’s the one who’s caused your illness and they’re probably sympathetic but you don’t care. Right now, all that matters is you and Jimin and you’re feelings for him. Because just once, you want to confess just once and then you can happily move on.

“Jimin I love you. I’m sorry” You rasp out and using the last of your energy smile at him, before it starts going dark once again. Jimin lets out a small a small cry, clutching your hand desperately.

“No! No I’m sorry, I didn’t know! I love you. Please, I love you. Come back please, just let me love you” Jimin cries, weeping as he presses a kiss to your hand, but you don’t respond.

“Mr. Park, please let her go. We have to operate” The nurse chides and Jimin simply shakes his head, holding onto you tighter.

“No! She needs to know! Please. Please” Jimin begs before he feels strong hands wrap around him and he tries to fight it, but Namjoon simply holds him tighter, pulling him away.

“Jimin, let her go” Namjoon says softly and he does. He watches with despair as you disappear through the doors and wonder if it’s the last time he’ll be able to hold you like that again, wonders if you’ll even remember his name or your memories or if you’ll ever be able to love him again the way he loves you.

“Hyung, I love her” Jimin cries, turning into Namjoon’s arms before collapsing. He cries into Namjoon’s chest, shoulders shaking as he runs fingers through his hair, wondering where the two of you went wrong. If only he had known. If only he hadn’t run away from you and his feelings the night you had slept together. Maybe then you’d still be in his arms, beside him.

“I know Chim, I know” Namjoon says softly, holding the younger tightly as he tries to soothe Jimin’s cries. Sooyun drops to he knees, pushing Jimin’s hair out of his face before looking at him with sad eyes, a small smile on her face.

“She loved you too. Right until the end, she loved you and only you” Sooyun says and she means it out of comfort, but all it does is make Jimin cry harder.

And then he coughs out a lily petal.

A/N: The alternative ending is now up! It’s not compulsory to read, but if you wanted to!

sequel: bloom II

Masterlist

[betweenpaperpages]

Hear Me Still - Chapter Seven

Summery: A new store-front is set to open on main street in Storybrooke and with it brings new resident Mr. Gold to the center of attention. While he looks forward to this new step in business, it is yet unknown if his deafness will set him back once again.

Beta: @ishtarelisheba

Read on AO3!

[Chapter One] [Chapter Two] [Chapter Three] [Chapter Four] [Chapter Five][Chapter Six]

Chapter Seven: More Than Meets The Eye

________________________________________________________________

Acquiring his new library card was a simple and straightforward affair, and in a matter of a few minutes Marcus had it slipped into his wallet and a new stack of books to read. He should really head back to the shop to get some work done or perhaps take care of a few other errands. 

Belle spoke up again before he had the chance to wish her a good day.

“How are you liking Storybrooke so far, Mr. Gold?” Belle questioned, handing him his books. “You haven’t been here long, have you?”

Marcus shook his head side to side lightly. “Oh, uh... no, not very long. Perhaps a month or so?” he answered, sounding unsure himself. “I haven’t been around town much… Busy putting the shop together.” 

Belle smiled as she listened to his answer, enjoying the brush of accent across his wording. “I can imagine, you seem to have quite the collection there.” She chuckled. 

“Y-yes well… one never knows what could be someone’s treasure.” 

“Have you had the chance to explore town at all?”

“A small portion, however, Grace is determined to take me on an adventure and show me the entire town before school begins.” 

“Grace? Grace Madden?” Belle questioned. 

Gold nodded, his gaze slipping down to the books in front of him, restacking them from smallest to largest. “Yes, Jefferson’s daughter. Do you know her?”

“Yes, she comes to story time every now and then with -- “ 

“Hey, lassie!” a heavily accented voice called, cutting her response off. “Can you help me over here for a sec?” 

Belle sighed in annoyance. Really, Merida should know to keep their voice down to a reasonable level. “Excuse me Mr. Gold, I’ll just be a minute.” She turned to walk around the circulation desk, brushing past him on her way. 

Marcus shook his head as he looked back up to her. “N-no, please, go ahead. I apologize for taking up your time,” he managed to mutter, though he was certain half of it wasn’t heard. 

“What can I do for you Mer?” Belle questioned. 

The conversation drifted into background noise the farther the librarian walked away to help the young redhead, leaving Marcus to gather up his books and quietly heading back home for the day.

xxxxx

Marcus sighed as the door swung open, stepping into Jefferson’s rather eclectic home. While he wouldn’t call it his style, he felt fortunate that he was invited and encouraged to call the space home. 

He took a step to the side, setting the library books down on the hall table and tossing his keys into the bowl before depositing his coat on the rack — which inevitably only stood to support Jeff’s favorite top hat.

The house’s silence hugged him as he made his way up to his bedroom, flicking on the lights as he went, confirming that both Jeff and his daughter were out. Marcus ran his hands through his hair, gathering the length together to tie off in a ponytail. It wasn’t an intended look - he more so used it for convenience, but it didn’t stop his family from pointing out the longer it got, the closer he was to having a man bun. He shook his head at the idea. Clearly he did not have the looks for such a style. Carefully, he reached back to each of his ears, clicking the off button and pulling out his hearing aids, setting them aside on the dresser. 

Going from a world of sound, music, and chatter to one of near void-like silence had not been an easy transition. However, it was something he simply had to deal with at the time. There had been no time nor reason to wallow in self pity. After a while, one became accustomed to their inner monolog being a constant companion. There certainly would never be a day he wasn’t alone with his thoughts. 

Marcus hummed ‘A Whole New World’ to himself as he made his way back downstairs. The song had been incessantly playing in his mind from Grace’s last rewatch of Aladdin. He only stopped for a moment to pick up the stack of borrowed cookbooks on his way to the kitchen.

Jefferson certainly had not skimped on the budget when he renovated the house. The kitchen had just about every element any chef, or in this case, a home cook could dream of. Large farmhouse sink, marble countertops, soft-close drawers, double ovens, a gas range, along with all other top quality appliances. Such a kitchen deserved a proper chef, but instead today it would have him for company again. 

He settled one of the cookbooks into a nesting stand, flipping through the pages before settling on a vegetarian casserole. The kitchen was well stocked and easily had all of the ingredients he would need without making a run to the grocery store for any last minute items. 

Marcus pulled out a colander to place in the sink before gathering his vegetables, taking a moment to make sure his shirt sleeves were well rolled, pulling on an apron, and starting to wash them up in cool water. Even though it was still summer it was a bit late in the season to plant anything in Jefferson’s garden. Perhaps if he was still living with the Maddens coming next year it could be his and Grace’s project.  

Moving to the cutting board with the zucchini and heirloom tomatoes, he picked out a suitably sharp knife and began slicing everything to the appropriate size, glancing back up and checking the recipe book for any details. Marcus enjoyed cooking, but even at his age he could admit he was still learning quite a few things. The fact that he was cooking for others and not just himself made the effort worthwhile and that much more enjoyable. 

As careful as he would be as if restoring an antique, he layered a baking dish with the vegetables along with fresh basil, garlic, salt and pepper, finishing off the top layer with a blend of cheeses. Sliding the dish into the oven and setting a timer, he washed up his tools and hands, moving on to pull out a small baguette. Quickly slicing it in half, he spread a garlic butter mixture on either side and set it to the side to be finished off at the last minute with the casserole.  

Yet another benefit of living with the Madden’s was Jefferson’s intention on keeping up with the latest technology. If it was released, he was most likely to have already ordered it before it came on the market. 

“Alexa,” Marcus called out, the small speaker unit hanging on the wall activating, “play Ludovico Einaudi.” 

Faintly he could hear the computer respond to his request and with a few beeps it began to play one of his albums. The soft piano music twined beautifully with the string instruments, filling the kitchen with a gentle ambiance. It would probably be easier to use a device and place a pair of headphones into his ears to get the best sound without wearing his hearing aids. However, he much preferred for the drifting music to fill the space around him, pushing the wall of near silence back just a few feet. 

xxxxx

Marcus had just slipped the garlic bread into the oven as he heard the high-pitched sound of the doorbell ring. Glancing up from his cookbook where he was leaning on the counter, he saw the LED light on the doorway flashing brightly. He set the book aside as he stepped into the hall when a small body with open arms crashed into his midsection without warning. 

“Uncle Gold, we’re home!” Grace announced happily, resting her chin on his belly as she grinned up at him. 

Marcus chuckled as he squeezed her back. “Yes, I can see that.” 

Jefferson frowned as he closed the door behind him with his foot, shaking his head. “Grace, we’ve talked about this before.” He sighed as he set the shopping bags down on the hall table. “You have to give him a chance to get to the door before barrelling in like that.”

“It’s fine, Jeff,” Gold brushed off, his eyes having been glued to his friend’s lips to read them. “I saw the kitchen doorbell, it's not like she gave me a heart attack.” 

“No, she knows the rules better than that. Grace, you owe Marcus an apology.”

Grace glanced to her father before back up to Marcus, biting her lip as she released him from her arms. “I’m sorry.” 

He took a knee down next to his niece as he bopped her nose with his finger, offering her a smile. “That’s quite alright, I get excited to see you, too. Why don’t you wash up, dinner will be ready in a few minutes.” 

“Okay.” 

Jeff shook his head again as he watched his daughter take off up the stairs before. “You spoil her you know that?” he questioned, though there wasn’t much mirth to his voice. 

“Not that much. She just has a lot of energy,” Marcus responded, pushing up off the ground. He picked up one of the bags to carry it through to dining room off the kitchen. “Alexa, pause music.”

“Still, she knows the rules. We went over them half a dozen times before you moved in. I don’t need nor want my child to give you a heart attack because you didn’t hear her.” Jefferson sighed, crossing his arms as he leaned in the doorway between the two spaces.

“Jeff, you’ve done more than enough to accommodate me. More than someone could reasonably ask. If I’m not paying attention to my surroundings and my heart is really that weak, then a heart attack is my own damn fault,” Marcus lectured. Really, the man had done more than enough to assist him with his transition into Storybrooke, let alone his business start up. Compared to what he had seen… Well, a young girl would hardly be the death of him. 

Jefferson adjusted his weight against the door frame, his face holding a curious expression though it dropped with another sigh. “I suppose you’re right.”

His hands dropped to the side as he stood up, turning towards the kitchen and taking a large inhale of the attractive aroma. “Besides, looking at that apron, who couldn’t benefit from having Julia Child living with them?” 

[otterbeesfanficblog]

Something Different {Markus X Android Reader}

CHAPTER 1: A Spark Like No Other

A/N: If you had read my other post, this is one of the stories I will be writing. Reader is the Android next door to Markus, both owners being very good friends. Readers owner is a photographer, and like Markus, Reader was a prototype gift from Kamski. I’m not sure how many Chapters of this I will be doing right now, but I will find out for the next chapter. In any case, I hope you enjoy!

EDIT: Got all the chapters for you guys. There’s a lot...  I’ll edit in links when they are posted.

Chapter 2: Never Seen You Through My Eyes Chapter 3: The Lonely Chapter 4: City Of The Dead Chapter 5: Pick A Star In The Dark And Follow The Light Chapter 6: What’s Gonna Be Left Of The World If You’re Not In It? Chapter 7: Love and Hate Are Beasts... Chapter 8: She Depends On You Chapter 9: Pictures We’re Living Through For Now Chapter 10: The Precipice Of Change Chapter 11: Raise A Glass To Freedom

Date: Nov 4th, 2038 Time: AM 05:24:28

The house was cleaned, clothes washed along with dishes, plants were watered inside the house, coffee was prepped, breakfast was finished, and all that’s left is the garden.

You always did leave the best for last.

Maybe it was the intended way Kamski made you, but you have always been most comfortable in places that were filled with all types of beauty and color. The garden owned by your owner, Aeron Raynott, was one such thing.

Aeron was a 28-year-old famous photographer, his pictures were known around the world, ranging from portraits to landscapes, panoramic photos, and so many more. He was a creative young man, ambitious, stubborn as a mule and known to not fear to speak his mind. Some called him an arrogant child, but many called him a genius.

Despite what the outside world sees and hears about him, you know him quite differently. He treated you well, very well. He always forgets that you aren’t human, often buying two meals when he was out for a day, only coming back to you telling him you didn’t require food. He says that your eye’s reminded him that of baby animals.

One day he told you that you had the eyes of an owl, big eyes filled with wonder, curiosity, and wisdom. He asked if you “Liked your eyes”, at first you only tilted your head to the side, telling him that ‘Like’ is a feeling, and that androids don’t have the ability to form opinions.

He had left it at that for that day, but ever since, he had not stopped trying to get you to feel something. In vain attempt of course, only getting smiles from you.

He thought of you as his best friend, he had told you this many times, and you were his #1 model. If he ever needed a model for a picture, he would beg you to do it. Even though you had told him many times that, no matter what, you would do what he told you to do.

Aeron was sleeping after having stayed up late editing pictures and picking which ones to present in the upcoming art exhibit, finally at 12:46 am you had convinced him to rest.

You found that your mind wonders whenever you were out in nature, seeing all the colors made your LED glow a pretty sky blue.

You were literally made to fit all of Aerons needs, Kamski made it very clear when making you that he wanted you to be different.

So, you were made to be creative, to be able to see everything in every little detail. You could zoom in with your eyes, and you could connect yourself to Aeron’s camera so he could take pictures through your eyes.

He did this a lot, not because it made him money, in fact, he almost never shows anyone pictures he takes with your eyes. He just loves the way you see things, he says he’s honored to even have the chance to see through your eyes.

The only person he has even shown those pictures to was the great Carl Manfred, your neighbor.

And of course his android, Markus.

You and Markus were close, as close as androids can get to another that is, and Carl and Aeron seemed to love having you two together.

Almost every day you two ‘run into’ each other while doing chores.

Speaking of which, you could feel his eyes on you at this very moment.

“Good morning, Markus.”

You say without turning to him, have been picking weeds out of some of the flower bushes. You spoke quietly, but no matter what low a volume you spoke, Markus always seemed to hear it.

“Good morning, Y/N. You are up earlier than usual.”

A soft smile is placed on your lips as you pick up the small bucket of weeds and turn to him.

He wore his normal dark clothing, his soft green eyes looked at you with what you can only assume is curiosity. You walk over to him slowly, the hedge that separated the yards being high enough for you to gently lay your arms on it, resting your head lightly on your arms and smiling up at him.

“Aeron was up late last night, knowing him, he will be up soon.”

“Again? How late this time?”

“12:46 am, unfortunately.”

Markus gave a small smile and shook his head.

“That late, huh? I have to say, you might be getting worse at being a caretaker that soon I’ll have to take over for you.”

You toss a few weeds at him over the hedge and turn away, going over to a bush you hadn’t started as you could hear Markus scuff a laugh.

“Will he be awake enough to meet with Carl today?”

You look over at Markus through your lashes, a smile gracing your face as you close your eyes and go back to the bush.

“I should think so.”

After this, a comfortable silence fell over you two, as Markus and you cleaned and cared for your respective gardens. You finished sooner and were now sitting upon a large rock in the big koi fish pond, and now you simply watched as they swam.

You had taken your shoes off and lightly tapped your toes on the top of the water, watching as the koi swam under your feet, brushing up against you.

You were lost in your own little world that you hadn’t seen Markus leave, or heard Aeron call you, then see you in the pond, and run back into the house, and come back out with his camera.

The click of said camera was what made you jump, turning your head and looking like a dear in the headlights as Aeron took several more pictures.

You smiled and let out a ‘breath’ of air.

“Aeron..”

“One more, one more, I promise!”

“Whenever you say ‘ one more’, you take 30 more.”

Aeron smiles at you from behind his camera.

“Okay, okay, one last one, I promise. I just need you to look into the pond as if you were dreaming again,” He knelt close to the edge of the pond, looking at you through the camera as he kept his ‘encouraging’ speech going.

“Look into it as if you see what you have always wanted. Longing for it, yearning for it!”

You do as he asks, looking dreamily into the pond. You weren’t really thinking of anything, much to Aeron's disappointment, it was very apparent on your face.

But as promised, he took one more pictured and helped you out of the pond.

You smile up at him and give him your automatic greeting for the day.

“Good morning, Aeron. Are you ready to start the day?”

*****************

Date: Nov 4th, 2038 Time: PM 06:05:01

“Leave the poor kids alone, Aeron, don’t you have enough pictures?”

You and Markus stand side by side as Aeron takes a few more pictures then turns to Carl, giving a look that made Carl laugh as Aeron whined.

“But Carl look at them! They are the epitome of perfection!! I’m surprised you haven’t painted at least Markus a few times. I know I would, I mean, look at him!”

It was at this point Aeron took a hold of Markus’ face, surprising both androids as he practically marvels at Markus’ face. Carl was shaking his head, watching as poor Markus had to endure having his face played with.

“Look at this beautiful, beautiful jaw line. And! And! Those strong green eyes that just pierce your soul! The perfection of his brows! UGH! And don’t get me started on the skin! Ugh, beautiful. Lovely freckles dotting his face, just in the right place just. Mmm, stunning. Perfect. Brilliant. You’re beautiful Markus, absolutely stunning.”

“Yeah, I see that you are making the poor boy incredibly uncomfortable.”

Aeron rolls his eyes and lets Markus go.

“Sorry Markus, you’re just so pretty. A perfect boy.”

“Uhm... Thank you?”

You look down at the ground smiling, a weird tingling in your chest as you watch Markus readjust himself and look at you again. The look on Markus’ face was too much for you as you put a hand up to your mouth, to poorly cover up your giggles.

Carl and Aeron got into another conversation, you and Markus simply standing idly by. It was then when Carl looked at you both and sighed.

“You two don’t have to stand and listen to us chat this whole time. Go on, go. Go find something to do while we chat.”

Markus nodded right away, but you were hesitant. Aeron chuckled and waved his hand to shoo you away.

“Go on, Y/N. You’ve been with Markus before, he won’t bite.”

You feel your thirium pump sped up when Markus turned to you.

“Why don’t we practice more piano?”

“That’s a great idea, Markus.” Carl nodded. “You two go on inside, Aeron will go get you if we need anything.”

With that, you nod and follow Markus into his and Carl’s home.

You had been in this house many times, and you had mapped it out since the third time you visited. So, you felt no shyness when being greeted by the house. Despite being here many times before, you still love to look at all the beautiful things in the house. You loved the birds in the front, and you adored the ceiling in the living room/dining room. Of course, the place you had loved to be to most was Carl’s studio.

Aeron’s studio was like Carl’s, with the wide open space and the big glass windows. Both places made you smile from ear to ear, but there was something about Carl’s that made you feel... warm?

Aeron’s had a feeling of being everywhere and everything all at once, something to awe at. And it’s not to say you didn’t feel comfortable in Aeron’s space, it was simply that you know what it’s like to be in awe of everything all the time.

You were programmed to take in over 7 billion things at once.

But, in Carl’s studio, you could... stop.

You could take in the simple things.

That’s one thing you liked about Markus as well, he made it so easy to be in awe of the little things that make life interesting.

Like, take now for instance.

You sit next to him on the stool of the piano and watch him play, and somehow he makes it very obvious that every key is important, that every note is important to form a song.

Markus made the little thing so important, so special.

You wish you could stop seeing the big picture all the time, and see the small picture. You wish you could be like Markus, to be simple and yet...

So, perfect.

“Y/N? Are you okay?”

You blink a few times before looking up at Markus, sitting side by side, it was difficult to not brush your shoulders together. That warm, tingling feeling came into your chest again as you looking into Markus’ eyes, only then seeing his LED flashing yellow.

“I’m sorry,” You shake your head. “I was... lost in thought.”

“About?”

“Hm?”

Markus turned his body a bit to face you a little more, showing all of his attention was on you. For some reason, that made your body feel hot, causing your cooling fans to work a bit faster.

“What were you thinking about?”

“I was thinking about how perfect you are.”

You quickly choose not to say what was on your mind as you turn back to the piano.

“I was wondering... how you manage to make it look so easy.”

Deep down, you knew Markus won’t fall for that answer, and the flashing yellow of his LED made that clear. But soon enough it turned back to sky blue as he dropped the issue, turning to the piano again.

“Well, it’s not as hard as you think. Here, play this on your side.”

Markus then played three keys on the low scale side of the piano, you copying him on the high keys.

Markus then played four more different keys, and you copied again. Markus then played four keys at the same time moved to another four keys.

This is when you gave him a look, to which he responded with a laugh and a smile.

“Look, it's not that hard-”

“It sounds hard.”

Markus shook his head with a smile.

“Look, I’ll show you. Just put your fingers-”

Before he could finish, he went to touch your hands to move them to the right spot, but something strange happened.

A surge of electricity shot through both your hands, making a blue spark appear between both you and Markus’ fingertips. This made you both jump up and stand up, you yelped and Markus gasped. The stool tipped over by how fast both of you stood up, making a rather loud thud.

Both of you felt something, both feeling a strange fuzzy feeling, it traveled from your hand up your arm and all through your bodies. You both visibly shiver from this feeling, then look at each other in shock.

“What... what was that?”

Your voice was low as you held your hand to your chest, Markus shook his head looking at his own hand.

“I’m not... quite sure what that was. It felt...”

“Strange...” You finished, looking at him with slight fear but mild curiosity.

Both of you had the same idea, as you slowly extend your hands to one another. As you go to touch the other, the skin on your hands fades, leaving behind the white porcelain fingers and palms.

Soon your fingertips touch again, no spark this time, but the warm feeling was very obvious. As you touched, a blue-ish huge starts to show on all the places your hands connected, and the warm feeling soon traveled from your hand to your wrist.

And from your wrist to your elbow, all the while, your skin disappeared more and more till nothing but white was your arm. Both you and Markus were in a trance by this, and suddenly you started to see things.

Not things, memories.

But, these memories were not yours.

You saw Carl and watched him paint, and eat, and you cooked and cleaned...

And then you saw yourself. In the garden behind your house. From this morning.

Soon enough it was too much and you snatched your hand away from Markus, gasping and holding your hand back to your chest as the skin of your arm went back to its S/C tone.

You were staring at Markus with wide eyes, as he stared back at you, not nearly having the same face of fear as you.

“I saw... I saw your memories.”

He spoke quietly, a lot softer and low than he ever had before.

You nod.

“I saw your’s too... With Carl and... and him painting and...”

“I saw me.” Markus tilted his head at you. “I saw me as if looking throw a mirror, it was like... watching myself in a movie. I saw myself walking and talking as clear as day... Did you... Did you see yourself too? Through my eyes?”

All you could do was nod, your stress was getting higher and higher, turning your LED into a blood red color. This is what brought Markus out of his daze, as he stepped forward to you.

“Y/N, I-”

You stepped back from his outstretched hand.

You were confused, and in awe, but most of all.

You were scared.

“Markus, Y/N? Are you two alright? We heard a noise.”

Carl was being wheeled in by Aeron, both the young man and the old man having concerned faces for the frightened looking androids. Markus was smart enough to cover for both of you.

“We were just playing and... we got up to go check on you both and the stool fell over. That’s all.”

Carl nor Aeron seemed convinced, but you nodded your head to agree with Markus. You didn't trust your voice enough to speak, so all you could do was nod.

“Well... Aeron was just about to leave, we came back in to get Y/N.”

Soon enough, you shook off your fears, your LED going back to its sky blue, and you nod.

“Of course, we shall be on our way then. Aeron, you have many calls to make as well.”

Aeron nodded slowly, then started making his way to the exit, you following close behind. Aeron said his goodbye to Carl and Markus, Carl doing the same to you and Aeron. And just as you were closing the door behind you, you heard something.

Someone, in your head.

Markus.

“Please... Meet me tonight when Aeron is asleep.”

You look back at Markus one last time, before closing the door behind you.

[hikelesbian]

Every even number for Carol and Therese.

SFW

2.) Who’s the messiest? The cleanest? – Therese can be the messiest literally, like leaving things out on the counter or creating stacks of things instead of putting them away, but Carol can be the most absent-minded which results in other kinds of messes like last-minute shopping. Overall, Carol is the tidiest superficially since she had a home to run and appearances to keep up before. Therese likes things to be neat too but if the artistic flow takes her somewhere, she’s gonna follow it.

4.) Living space has a leak! Who fixes it? – Definitely Therese. She’ll put on her jeans and her flannel and her little headband and get down to work. (Carol absolutely loves this look, btw). And if she doesn’t already know how to do something, she’ll find a book about it and learn how to do it. Carol brings more domestic fixes to the table, like how to fold a fitted sheet, or surprising fixes like how to get rid of a hangover.

6.) Going out to eat: Who pays? Who orders the most food? And who has dessert? – Carol pays most of the time because she’s loaded. Therese is okay with this because it’s just the facts, but when Therese offers Carol always lets her pay. Therese definitely orders the most food because her eyes are bigger than her stomach and usually takes the rests home, while Carol is more peckish and usually declines to take things home. They both like to split dessert, both because they just like dessert and because it’s something they can do in public together that isn’t too wildly noticeable.

8.) Who knows how to swim? Who doesn’t? – Therese knows how to swim technically but she’s not a fan of exerting herself in any sporty way. If it’s hot enough she’ll get into the pool and tread water but she’s not gonna do much more. Carol knows how to swim and do laps and used to enjoy it when she was younger, but it was one of the many things she had to stop doing as a young lady. Occasionally they’ll go to the pool but they prefer the beach if Rindy is with them. Carol tends to sit under the umbrella and read or people-watch because she tends to burn easily, while Therese is more of a collecting seashells and exploring kind of girl.

10.) Any pets? Or plants? – Carol’s not really the pet type. She’s a little too protective of her furniture to let a cat or dog scratch it up. She used to garden for fun when they had the house, but since she’s moved it’s fallen to the bottom of her list of hobbies because there’s just no space in an apartment. Therese doesn’t mind the no-pets situation since she never grew up with any pets and any plant Therese has is gonna go several days without being watered because she’s got other things on her mind tbh.

12.) Can they stand silence? Who talks the most? Who talks the least?  Once the confusion and the heartbreak and the drama has all passed, they’re definitely able to to spend more time with each other, which leads to being more open with each other, which leads to more conversations about a variety of things. Therese is still notoriously silent at times, but it means she’s focusing and thinking extra hard. Now that she knows what she wants and she has the words for it, she’s not shy about letting Carol know how much she means to her. As for Carol, she’s outgoing and genial with just about anybody, but for her words to have real substance and emotion she has to be around the right people.

14.) Who is the highest maintenance? Does the other mind? – Oh my god, Carol is physically the most high maintenance of course. Total high femme. She enjoys taking her time getting ready and making herself look good, she’s got her little beauty rituals, she’s meticulous about clothing, putting outfits together, doing her hair. She will not be rushed on any of this. Therese drinks it up—at night she’s usually the first in bed, reading or just watching Carol while Carol takes off her make-up, puts on lotion, and gets ready to join her.

NSFW

2.) Who brings ideas? Who initiates? – It’s like 60/40 on new ideas, only because Carol has more experience and can think of new things based off that too. But Therese is younger and runs with a younger, rowdier crowd, so she’s not clueless either and catches on pretty quickly. Carol is more into the classics and Therese is more creative, and they’re both open to both because they just like doing things together. Carol tends to invite initiation more than initiate things outright—touching Therese’s shoulders while she’s playing piano, subtle looks, etc. When Therese takes the initiative, she’s more upfront about it with bold kisses, naughty words, etc.

4.) Oddest place they’d have sex? – Given the time period and their personalities, they’re both pretty tame on this. Within the apartment though, anywhere is fair game. Considering it’s hard to see into another building/other people’s windows all the way across the street, they’ve got some privacy that way, so sex by the window and in the sunlight/breeze is a favorite.

6.) Dom/top? Sub/bottom? Any switches? – No dom/sub. I see them both as verses, but with Carol topping a little more often than Therese because of her personality and also the experience. Carol is wary of control per se or the thought of coercing Therese into doing anything and is more into guiding instead, so she likes to check in with Therese by pausing, light touches. Not outright words as much because she’s got her own flair for the dramatic lmao. Therese is way more verbal in bed and can sweettalk Carol in a way that makes her melt, and can be a tease in her own right.

8.) Favourite erogenous zones? – For Therese, anytime Carol touches her face. If Carol cups her jaw or brushes her thumb against her in any way, she’s a goner. She’s a trembler when she’s turned on enough and Carol can get that out of her if she kisses Therese behind her ear. She likes wrist kisses too along with anything on her inner thighs. As for Carol, she’s into the classics and more intimate sexual touches now that she doesn’t have to pretend to be straight, so she’s big on having her neck and shoulder area kissed or her ass squeezed.

10.) First to orgasm? Last to orgasm? Who comes the most? Does someone ever end up unfinished? – First to orgasm is Therese because girl is like what, twenty-something? Everything is new and exciting and she’s just gonna come first most of the time unless she’s actively doing something for Carol first. Carol is more in control of herself and a bit of a fan of delayed gratification for herself, so she’s usually ‘last’ in the sense that she might take longer. But unless one of them is on their period or has some specific act in mind, they go to bed with about equal amounts of orgasms no matter how long that takes. There are times for whatever reason when sex is more about simple touch or the mood changes though, so it’s not impossible that someone ends up unfinished. But that’s on the rare side.

12.) How are their afterglows? – Therese is a mess lmao. Needs a minute to gather herself, then she’s all smiles and loving gazes and likes to be pretty close to Carol until they start round two. Past three orgasms though and she’s liable to get sleepy quick. Carol tries to look more composed and dignified (but if Therese is laughing or smiling she’s always quick to follow). Past two orgasms for Carol and she definitely loses that composition, gets more raw and honest.

14.) Lights on or off? Do they look at each other? Or is someone embarrassed? – They absolutely look at each other. Therese has no problem with it and it’s one of the things that she’s more confident consistently about than Carol is for a number of reasons. But after the first few words of encouragement, Carol’s just as into it as Therese and there’s no more shyness (unless they’re purposefully playing coy).

[victorluvsalice]

~IT’S THE GLORIOUS RETURN OF NEWCREST ADVENTURES~

And, uh, it’s very glorious indeed -- another four-part update, folks! To be fair, the first part is basically all about showing off the house properly, like I promised. Again, the original build was done by KaynicP on the gallery -- theirs was a pink Victorian-style starter home for multiple Sims, which I plopped down on the Midtown Meadows lot and made my own. Which was a long and arduous process of getting every little detail just right. . .I think it turned out very well, though! Upstairs, we have Victor and Alice’s bedroom, Emma’s bedroom, the family bathroom (which was SUCH a pain to try and get right), and a study nook for everyone to enjoy. Downstairs, I converted two potential bedrooms into Victor’s music room and Alice’s art studio respectively, put in a living area, and SOMEHOW found a way to fit in a kitchen. It was hard, because I KNEW I wanted the dining table next to all those windows, but I wasn’t sure how to get the kitchen itself to work for the longest time. Had to delete a few walls around the stairs and move a couple of doors around to finally get it all to play nice. (With the real irony being, only one person in this family eats these days. . .)

For original buildings, I stuck a greenhouse out the back! Victor’s plants need sheltering from the elements, after all -- although the plasma fruit tree is still outside for the moment, as that’s always in season. I also made sure Emma had the new swingset available, and found room for the slip-n-slide and the doggy obstacle. I still have a few changes I want to make -- namely, I want to give the family a pool at some point, which might move the greenhouse to the other side of the backyard -- but funds were starting to run a bit low, and as I wanted them to be able to afford their bills. . .

Oh, and lot traits! This place has Great Soil (for Victor’s gardening -- even if most of his plants are in planters now), Home Studio (for Alice’s creative pursuits -- that one covers not only painting, but writing as well, and as she’s working on the Bestselling Author aspiration. . .), and Great Acoustics (for Victor’s piano playing -- gotta foster the creative spirit!).

So yeah, that’s the new place! What did the Van Dorts think once they were finally allowed to stop just standing around outside with time eternally paused?