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bubblyqueer000 · 1 year

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APRIL FOOLS JOKE POST Mondo Owada x Me PART 3!! THE FUCKENING :0

soz I haven't been posting. I'll make an update soon C:

still tho gotta do my yearly april fools day post!!

FUCKING SHIT WIENER COCK DOODLE!! HEY DICK NOSES IT’S BUBZ CHAN AND IM MAD. RAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHDFNNJHBNJHBGBHNJHBGVHNHBVGBNBHHB

Okay so like last year that little cock weasel, monocumstain killed my boyfriend, mondo because he was mad he commited a hate crime and fucked me on the tables in the cafeteria, coating them in his dick cheese in the process. UGGGGHH

BUT ACTUALLY I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS REALLY PUNISHED BECAUSE I WAS THE ONE TASKED WITH SCRAPING HIS SMEGMA OFF OF EVERY SURFACE OF THE SCHOOL!!!! >:C

I was in the midst of using a metal spatula to scrape off his dried up mondo butter from under the tables when I felt a horrible pain filling my chest.

“Ow tf” I sayed

“Shut the fuck up” said Kyoto

“No you cunt, my stomach really hurts.”

“Well no shit we’re all like a million years old now and during that whole time mondo was fuckin destroying your organs.” Said toastermi

“…

…

Shit u right.” And then I felt another horrible fucking pain in my tummy!!! “AHHHHHHFHDNDNBDNDJDNDND NO YOU BITCHES IDK WHATS HAPPENING”

“maybe u need a nap c: “ Nina told me

“YOU DONUT SUCKING FUCK WAD HELP ME.”

“DON’T WORRY YALL I GOT THIS!” Said sakura, kicking me as hard as she could in the stomach making my organs squirt out of my ass with a loud shlorp.

“OH SHIT IN THE SINK GET HER TO THE SINK!” Shouted byakuya bc he thought it was my period and he was scared of periods and stuf.

So yea soccer ball carried me over her shoulder into the kitchen and plopped me in the sink where I screamed and farted loudly lmfao. I really hope that no one actually gets turned on by this dear fucking god.

“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH” idk how birth works soz.

So yeah I shitted out a bb.

“What the fuck” Said everyone collectively.

“Goo goo ga ga 😀” He goo goo ga gad

“HOW THE SHIT DID THIS HAPPEN?”

“Because you had tons of unprotected sex with mondo.”

“Oh yeah ur right. Alright well… Idk ummm ill name u mondo after ur dad ig.”

“otay” he said bc that’s how babies talk according to fan fic writers wtf is wrong with you people??

“Acutually you can;t lol” said byakuya smartily. “Bc if u did that everytime you called him that hed think of how u fucked his dad or some shit.”

“Byakuya what the actual fuck. I don’t think you understand the absurdity of what you just said. Not only is that sexualizing my infant son, but it’s also an incredibly perverse interpretation of a healthy relationship based on love and respect, and now that he’s passed us on, it’s all the more insensitive.” I told him and everyone started clapping. I looked at the fuckin kid and thought and thought. “Wait wat was mondo’s brother’s name again?”

“Diarrhea.” Sayd makoto.

“LMAOOOOO k ur names diarrhea.” i told the child.

“K lol.” he said.

“Ermmm… ERRRRMM…. ERRRMEN AOT…… ERMINEM SLIM SHABBY SLIM ANUS….. ERRRRM…” byakuya erms.

“WHAT WANT BUTT FART???” I sowed

“well everyone knows that babies need a mommy and daddy or else thre brains wont work. so im volunteering to be ur rich and morty. fuck wait no. rich baby daddy” he explammmed rickbabydaddily

“??? Tf no!! richie bitches suck” and then I rapped the entirety of piggy pie by icp for everyone but it was a parody that fit the situation like that one mlp web series we all watched as kids that had the parody wreck it ralph op and there was also fuckin evelyn evelyn and confrontation from jekly and hyde parodies ummmm… hold on let me google it. PRINCESS TRIXIE SPARKLE BY MAGPIE PONY.

so I took a break from writing this and taking care of my bastard son to re watch that series and then the first four seasons of mlp and then like all of rainbow dash presents fuck i miss the early days of mlp lmao

So anyways after that I came out of my room and Daiya II was like a teenager because I was watching mlp content for like fifteen years.

“Hewwo mwommy” he said

“Ew why do you still talk like that? Get that shit out of here.”

“Jeez you’re such a bitch.” He told me.

“:0??? >:0! Go to ur room you little shit!”

“NO mom! >:0! YOU go to YOUR room!”

“Wait what.” and then my own son stabbed me. “Ow bitch u stabbed me in the tit.”

“Yea but it’s dedly bc ur like 47893845748398.”

“...”

“SHIT” so yeah I fuckin died.

“You… cunt.” I said and stoped living.

When I woke up I was in hell. And who else was there???

Ur MOM! (sorry if ur mom is actually ded or somethin rip)

BUT ALSO MONDO AND DAIYA OWADA (the first one not my son)???? :0

“Hey cootie ;0” said doodie owada

“MONDO!” I cried running over to him.

“Am I a joke to you?” Daiya asked bc i ignored his dumb ass

“Wassup bbygrl C:” Mondo asked.

“I missed you so much.” I told him.

“Awww”

…

“Kay let’s fuck already.”

“K.”

Our clothes all burned off bc my homophobic relatives tell me that I hell is hot. Then they bent me over. I suckked daiyas dick and took mondos in my ass.

“Glucglucglucglucglucgluc” i said suckn dick.

“Coom” and then I fake my organism.

Soooo yeah were done and were just chillin wit angel hazbin hotel bc it’s hell. BUT IT TURNED OUT THAT DAIYA II WAS THERE BC HE WAS EXECUTED LMFAO

Anyways happy april fools day seeya next year :3

#crosspost #danganronpa #fanfic #trigger happy havoc #ao3 #danganronpa x reader #anime #mondo oowada x reader #mondo owada x reader #archive of our own #mondo owada #mondo x reader #mondo butter #fanfiction

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aqueeracademic · 1 year

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morse being queer (and other commentary) pt 14:

season 4, episode 2, “Canticle”:

- so far this season isn’t very gay 🫤

- i miss jakes ‼️‼️

- SINGGGGG BITCH

- this music video would be a target pride ad tbh

- don’t even try to say i’m wrong

- wait isn’t this episode super gay?

- IT IS

- omg

- get ready for me to go absolutely ballistic

- character hasn’t even introduced himself yet and we r already seeing his entire ass

- also can this lady stfu?

- “‘kiss me.’” “what?!”

- morse panicking every time theres even a suggestion of physically intimacy is so….

- anyways

- as someone who grew up in colorado, i forget constantly that weed has ever been illegal

- the way morse looks at the younger brother when he meets the band

- clocks the queer and is immediately interested 🥰

- i actually have 0 clue if that’s the gay one i’m just guessing

- “never did anything for me.”

- thursday smokes pot and listens to the grateful dead is my new hc for him

- “you ever tried it?” “i’m a serving police officer!” MORSE U ARE LAME BOO BOO BOO

- “you put enough beer away.”

- TELL EM THURSDAY

- “beer is brain food.”

- YOU TELL EM MORSE

- [i am fully joking. smoking is bad for you, and i would never encourage it under any circumstances. i would also never shame anyone for partaking. i do vouch for the legalization of drugs such as marijuana and shrooms tho. just do what u wanna do!]

- i love summertime because they’re all walking around in just their shirt sleeves 🥰

- thursday and morse just laughing at this lady is so real of them

- the daughter immediately becoming attracted to morse because of how he talks to her mom is the realest shit i’ve ever seen

- i am obsessed with The Wildwood

- like i said in the tiger episode, the episodes where a woman is guilty are always more interesting and this one is the PRIME example

- let’s not pretend like loads of rock songs aren’t based on poetry

- they could have been onto something 🙄🙄

- this band is a bunch of 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

- debryn choking morse ???????

- like okay

- pressing up against his back and shit

- i love these two together

- given the marching band coats they’re all wearing i wanna say this band is supposed to represent the beatles during their sergeant pepper days which had me wondering which of the beatles this writer thinks is gay

- joy pettybon is SO ANNOYING 🙄🙄

- this song is an absolute banger

- so basically the position the gay guy has in the band is the same as john lennon for the most part

- so this writer thinks john is a lil 💅

- and i respect that

- however!

- the english band that was supposed to tour with the kinks and got denied their visas was the Moody Blues so they could be referencing that band also

- THURSDAY IS SO MEAN

- pettybon’s daughter is kinda…

- jk

- free her from this hell tho!

- the way he goes 🤫 at her after she asks him not to tell about the cigarette

- i’m obsessed w him 😭

- the way her talking about homosexuals is not even an outdated argument

- like

- we have not progressed

- props to this guy for standing up for himself and other queer people

- and i hate that nick is the one she said all that homophobic shit to directly

- i know morse hated her ass

- “he’s a pervert” SHUT UR BITCHASS UP

- as a gay, i can guarantee you gay people want nothing to do w ur dirty ass kids

- “it was about love. she said it was dirty. how can love be dirty?” “well if it isn’t then i suspect you aren’t doing it right.”

- HES FUCKING GAY

- this man jessop is talking about writing about the queer experience and wondering how it can be dirty and morse tells him that if it isn’t a little bit then he isn’t doing it right

- that’s like a quadruple entendre

- he’s fucking queer and that line alone proved it to me

- also good on him for telling joy her supporters got violent with jessop

- she’s a bitch

- her performative goodwill-doing is SO ACCURATE

- HOW HAVE WE NOT PROGRESSED???

- oh this bettina girl is a hoe

- good for her!

- morse instinctively straightening up when he decided to have a drink w her 💀💀

- he’s such a whore

- this girl straight up called his life sad because he’s alone 😭😭😭

- like she’s right but goddam girl

- “you seem lonely”

- FINAL STRAW

- death by chocolate is so wild

- the way she catches morse’s eye the day after and he just looks away 😬

- “the threat was made against you. so far as i can see, you’re still here.”

- GO MORSE GO

- the way morse smiles while jessop goes off about pettybon

- and the way that after they accuse him he looks to morse

- people go to morse for comfort in every scenario i hate it here

- OMFG I HATE JOY

- her daughter has NO FRIENDS and sought comfort in an older man via CONVERSATION because her father died and she’s projecting and her mom slaps her across the face for it

- like what the fuck 😀

- i. hate. her.

- the way nick is mourning a lover this entire episode and we don’t know until the very end

- and the way that queer people had to mourn silently for lovers, dead or alive, just because they couldn’t be together

- and people still now have to do that

- i’m sick.

- this is my favorite episode if you couldn’t tell

- combines my two favorite things

- gay people and the 1960s progressive movement via its ties to rock music and bands

- like i live for this shit

- also detectives

- i love a detective

- “comparing his [nick’s] lyrics to james joyce and oscar wilde” AKA TWO QUEER AUTHORS (joyce was only alleged it’s never been proven)

- like how did people not clock him as a homosexual

- tf?

- trewlove is so real for being a serious police officer and genuinely a genius while also being a boy band fan

- the reverend literally shit himself to death

- i’m not laughing 😐😐

- morse listening to rock and roll agenda ‼️‼️‼️

- nah this girl is wild for showing up to his flat

- him letting her in is even crazier

- his face when he says “no more than usual” IM SCREAMING

- why is he so 🗣️🗣️🗣️🗣️

- i’m gonna lose my mind over him

- her asking him if she’s gonna burn in hell and him being like 🫤 like girl he does not believe in hell

- YOU WHAT

- “i love you” GIRL WHAT?????????

- his face

- boy said

- 😮😧

- “there’s someone else” GIRL U WERE NOT EVEN ON THE ROSTER

- “nick wrote it about me”

- girl….

- and then says she’s not allowed to go to the Enchanted Place but fully lets morse go

- like queen

- she looked at nick and said I Know What You Are and then committed murder over it

- so wild!

- PLEASE IM DYING

- bro gets offered a drink and says no SO aggressively

- trying not to catch the sleeping with suspects allegations out here

- nick reaching for his drink the second barry comes up 😭😭

- i feel so bad for this kid 😀 but i’m normal about it i swear 😀

- “don’t you want to expand your mind?” translates directly to “i know ur gay and u should act on it”

- “you ever tried em [mushrooms]?” “only as part of an english breakfast.”

- and then BOTH OF THEM GIGGLING?????

- morse couldn’t help but flirt huh

- i hate him

- and then smiling at him genuinely and asking him about his interests???

- hello.

- PLEASE THE SMILE WHILE NICK EXPLAINS WHATS BEYOND THE DOOR

- AND THE WAY HIS FACE DROPS WHEN NICK SAYS “infinite love”??????

- he figures it out really early on he just didn’t want to out him

- i stand by that

- “there is no shame. no guilt.”

- and morse finally breaks eye contact and looks away??????

- this scene is so inherently queer

- and then nick finally breaking down over barry 😭😭😭😭

- and morse is just not judgmental

- he KNOWS what happened between them 😐 and he won’t out nick 😐

- i’m normal about this episode 😀

- morse refusing to look at her naked 😧 sir i need you to be normal

- “Well, i hope you’ve arrested him. Dudley Jessop. He’s an abomination in the eyes of our lord.”

- “Strangely enough, the police training manual omits to mention abominations.”

- i just want to point out that no one in this entire show defends queer people the way morse does and i feel like it’s really telling

- just like jessop, he stands up for queer people

- they are comparing the two of them

- and they juxtapose him to nick while also making it clear that there’s something similar between them

- like HELLO????

- wake up.

- writing my dissertation about this episode

- anyways ‼️

- “Thankfully, Thursday and I can remember a time when people were decent.”

- the way morse looks absolutely disgusted by her

- i love him

- morse is literally celebrating in his mind when this lady gets arrested

- he’s so fucking happy 💀

- “he’s hiding something.”

- once again, i fully believe that morse KNOWS that nick is queer

- he knows that nick was with barry

- but he refuses to out him

- morse going back to nick’s spot because he knows where he goes to escape is so…

- morse just understands the queer people in this show and i’m obsessed w it

- nick 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

- justice for my boy!

- his brother is so real for keeping the girls away from him

- this girl is FUCKED for fully melting his brain to cover for herself

- i hate her

- debryn is awfully aware of the culture surrounding acid 🤨

- anything you’d like to tell us doctor?

- i like thursday referencing cain and abel

- makes u think it might have been the brother’s doing

- but no!

- i love a lil red herring

- morse finding the proof of nick’s relationship with barry 😬

- he can’t keep it on the dl now

- how unfortunate

- always sucks when ur fellow gays are tied up in murder 🙄

- “it was what he deserved.”

- GET HER BETTINA

- saying that someone deserved to die because of how they were “carrying on”???????

- ma’am

- you married a gay man

- it’s as simple as that

- there’s no need for all this hatred

- just divorce and move on there’s no need to drive people to end it all

- “she’ll be back.” “no. she won’t.”

- GET HER THURSDAY!!!!

- trewlove being a fan of boy bands is the ONLY reason morse solved this case so here’s a shoutout to all my boy band girlies out there!

- it’s me. i am the boy band girlie

- morse’s freckles 🥰🥰🥰

- the lemonade was already spiked when he drank it which means that girl was tripping ballsack and speaking completely normally

- good for her

- he drank so much 💀💀💀

- bro is about to meet god

- ope i was wrong

- nick is bisexual

- bisexual awareness!!

- OSCAR WILDE APPRECIATION

- morse being privy to the contents of a book about… actually i won’t say 🤨

- the book is called Justine by de Sade

- if ur curious

- the contents are sensitive tho so be wary

- ANYWAYS

- i always appreciate queer people from that period using oscar wilde as a means of communication or identifying other queer people

- and the fact that morse knows that off the top of his head…

- oh my god

- chris and nick 💀

- what all of you don’t know is that i assumed chris was the gay one at the beginning of the episode because i couldn’t remember which of them was gay

- and i wrote in these notes that it was him

- and then went back and deleted it because i was wrong and it was nick

- BUT I WAS FUCKING CORRECT

- CHRIS IS QUEER TOO

- i’m losing my mind

- just like morse is about to 🥰

- morse having a bad trip is so unfortunate

- it would b interesting to see him have a good trip and change his entire perspective on drugs tbh

- except that he has an addictive personality

- so it’s actually good he had a bad trip and will never even attempt drugs again!

- we won ladies

- his waist is soO SNATCHED

- morse 🥺🥺

- i don’t wanna know what he was hallucinating but yes i do

- because i’m a nosy bitch.

- “he went to hell and back.”

- thursday gets it

- morse in a wife beater agenda‼️‼️🗣️

- “what day is it?” “corned beef.” “it’s friday.”

- I LOVE THEM OH MY GOD

- i hate it here

- there’s no way that pillow is comfy

- why is it up so high

- oh my god he’s so fine

- GOOD FOR YOU BETTINA

- nah joan is foul for calling him and then not saying anything

- absolutely foul.

- to be quite honest i’m not sure i can forgive her after this little plot point

- so for anyone who isn’t privy to tarot card meanings:

- the hanged man, upright, means the person is experiencing sacrifice and martyrdom. this is obviously applicable to morse as he is very self sacrificial. martyrdom is typically defined as suffering or death to obtain sympathy; this can be applied to morse as he is intentionally being made to suffer by the people around him and it is causing people to swarm to him. we will see more of this in the future.

- the lovers, upright, represents duality and union as well as an important relationship. it is interesting that they chose to display this card upright given he keeps losing people he loves and the card in reverse (representing loss of balance and disharmony) would be more fitting. it does mean, though, that he could be seeing a relationship coming into his life that will provide him balance and unity

#this one is so long #but it’s my favorite episode #like in the entire show #i’m obsessed with this episode #i love #gay #people #endeavour #endeavour itv #endeavour morse #morse #itv endeavour

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brainfilehasstoppedworking · 10 months

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My old fic I made :0

Patches silently looked at a grave stone. The day was cold, wind blowing all over her. She had her hair up for the first time in her years alive. "I wish you were here..." she whispered. Today was the anniversary of her late friend's death. "I never even got to tell ya how I feel..."

She remembered the day. The day she didn't save him. She shouldn't have brought him, she wanted to go alone, to die just to save her friends. But he was so stubborn.

"I'm going whether you like it or not. You're my best friend and I can't stand to lose you. Especially when I know I could save you." Newspaper said to her. She told him that he couldn't go with her. With her to stop the scientists who made her life a living Hell.

"News, these people aren't normal people. They're beyond human, I can handle it. You wouldn't even make it through the door!" Patches argued. "You're just a normal human with a normal life. Live it."

"No, I meant it when I said I would stay by your side. So I will."

"News-"

"That's final." He smiled at her. "I promise, we'll both make it out together."

He was a fool. A stubborn fool.

"You're an idiot...a liar and an idiot. You promised me. You promised me you would come out of there with me..." Patches said, she was upset. "You lied. You lied to me. You said you would be alright! YOU LIED! YOU'RE A LIAR!" She screamed.

"News!"

Newspaper was injured badly. He turned his head to look at her. His face was all bloody, and his bodyfull of burns, cuts, bullet wounds, etc. He smiled at her. "I messed up, Kiddo...I messed up..." his tears welled up in his eyes. "Shut up, you'll be fine."

"Kiddo, I broke my back, I'm burnt to a crisp, I have bullet holes for days...and I've lost a lot of blood...I'm not fine." Newspaper chuckled. Patches held him close. "Don't die on me, Newspaper. You can't die, you promised."

"Sorry." He continued smiling. "I have no choice but to die. I'm so sorry." He sobbed into her shoulder. "I'm so sorry." He repeated. Patches cried. She hadn't cried in a long time. "I can't let you die. Come on, I'll get you outside."

"No, we won't make it...ow! Shit. That hurts." He hissed in pain as Patches picked him up. "Sorry." She held him close. He was heavy, but she had to try. "Patches, stop. I ain't gonna make it. Just go. Kick their asses for me. I know you can do it. I love you." Newspaper just smiled, and soon, he stopped breathing. His head fell back with no sign of life.

Patches stared at the corpse in her arms. "Newspaper...hey, it's not funny. Stop it." She shook him but nothing. No sly smile, no funny remark, nothing. It was silent. She was alone. "Please, wake up. I love you too, just wake up. Wake up!" Everything went blank. She didn't remember anything else.

She later found herself covered in the blood of her enemies. She knew she murdered the son of a bitches who destroyed everything in her life.

"I love you." She stood up, leaving a white flower behind. 'Goodbye, Franklin...' she whispered.

Here lies Franklin "Newspaper" Arison.

#sam's talky talks #Franklin “Newspaper” Aristotle #Franklin “Newspaper” Arison #<- APPARENTLY!#Patches (OE-256)

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dxscmfrt · 5 months

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slsdblr part 3

i feel like i should mention that these fake posts aren't necessarily canon canon and the only thing really real about them is the character dynamics. general time period (??) of these posts is within about 0-2 days after the world update

also pguy would absolutely start discourse over the most random things lmao.

0 notes

☀️ solarisricefield Follow

world update

we made it through another month !! say congratulations everyone !! with may just around the corner the snow-rainy season is ending and we will soon be entering the dry season. good luck with the weather it's about to get fucking crazy

patch notes - 30/04/2024

sol gets over their inability to name things. congratulations to everyone who got a name! i hope you're happy with what you have. sorry sleepy better luck next month

added the past

removed the past

added the past, but different

humanity is 0.63% less annoying. cant really do much at this rate sorry

added birthday updates in patch notes. i thought it would be nice.

removed herobrine

birthdays !!

08/04 - ya boi turned 18 three weeks ago. too late to say happy birthday now but you can still say it if you want.

14/04 - happy 23rd birthday to ruby!!

#world update #30/04/24 world update #slsdverse #sol's stuff and things

3,386 notes

🎒 no1parachutelover Follow

WHERE'S HEROBRINE

☀️ solarisricefield Follow

i removed him

🎒 no1parachutelover Follow

NO WHERE WAS HE BEFORE THE UPDATE. I NEVER SAW HIM.

☀️ solarisricefield Follow

i removed him in the update before this one

🎒 no1parachutelover Follow

THEN WHY DID YOU REMOVE HIM AGAIN.

☀️ solarisricefield Follow

somebody's gotta make sure

#reblog

52 notes

🔥 ratinacage Follow

thanks sol (and everyone) for the (very late) birthday wish...

#btw i meant this in a lighthearted way hehe... no hard feelings! i get it /gen #rue.txt

343 notes

☀️ solarisricefield Follow

none of you wished me a happy birthday

#sol's stuff and things

2 notes

🎼 parachysonata Follow

you guys only remembered to wish rue a happy birthday today? pathetic. i did that just in time and even threw a whole party for her. do better.

🎒 no1parachutelover Follow

OH MY GOD WE GET IT you have celebrity influence over the whole world and you two are lovebirds who love each other soooooo much you have to keep reminding everyone about it

🧵 craftswithoutarts Follow

P guy can you shut up? She probably meant it as a joke. It doesn't mean much. Piper is just commenting on how everyone forgot, and also how good of a girlfriend she is. Leave her alone let people express themselves

📘 giftedkidburnout Follow

okay normally i wouldn't be on board with pguy's tendency to fish for discourse over the most random things but he's right you know. ruby has already said that the late birthday wishes aren't a big deal, this post wasn't necessary.

🎼 parachysonata Follow

you all aren't even real friends if you can't even say happy birthday on time.

🎒 no1parachutelover Follow

see? it's not a joke, acacia. parachy if you just wanna make everyone else feel bad about themselves just quit it. youre just fishing for attention at this point

🎼 parachysonata Follow

Haha i'm sorry WHO'S fishing for attention? you're the one who decided to respond to my post with that confrontational-ass shit. i'm just making a statement. i'm not fishing for attention. tell that to sol, they're the one who keeps posting about "ohh nobody wished ME a happy birthday boo hoo" bitch nobody cares.

🔥 ratinacage Follow

piper please, i already said i didn't mind. it's not a big deal...

🧵 craftswithoutarts Follow

I take back everything I've said. Stop it. Don't bring Rice into this, you're lucky they muted tumblr notifs otherwise I pray for the well being of your ass

📘 giftedkidburnout Follow

@solarisricefield

🧵 craftswithoutarts Follow

Anemone no

☀️ solarisricefield Follow

🐟 fishfinderrr Follow

🎣 FISH FOUND!

There are 4 FISH in this post!

🧵 craftswithoutarts Follow

SANDY

87,246 notes

#original character #slsdverse #slsdblr #solaris ricefield #parachute guy #ruby flare #piper sonata #acacia woodlen #anemone sparks #sandy waters #rice's thoughts #fake post #unreality #realising that sol has their full real name as their username. just deity things i guess

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mostlymalena · 5 months

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April 13th 2024 10:50pm

Just got done eating G out. Wonderful and tasty per usual. She is asleep next to me, and she is really pretty.

It has been a while, apologies, I have been so empty but a candle has been relit inside my soul. Why? NO IDEA LMAO. I'm just waking up again and thank god bc the last couple weeks have been an empty shallow hole.

Do I have tea to spill. Remember rine?? Of course you do since ive been writing about her for some time now!!! We had our lovely sleepover and the NEXT FUCKING DAY I get the wonderful news this bitch has a FUCKING BOYFRIEND LMAO and for some time too!!!!! I was so upset tbh bc why is this such a pattern?!?!?! Anyways I confronted her at Reggies bc she was meeting me there and we had talked about her sleeping over that night. She confirmed it and I walked away and left instantly to bluepost. We have not spoken since and will not. I get to bluepost and Gracie is there. I tell her immedielty what has happened and she makes me feel better. Out of the corner of my eye I see something slither into view dressed like a distressed scarecrow. Who else but Belle, parks her 2by4 ass across from me and Gracie and just idk.. keeps and eye on us?? Just stares. I do not know if P is there but I do not stick around to find out. Me and Gracie leave and she sleeps over.

G and I have been hanging again on account of my therapist telling me that shutting down and cutting people out of my life the second I feel vulnerable is not a good thing. Wild huh. She said I need to give Gracie a chance to let me forgive her. Uncomfortable but will give it a shot. We are hanging but I will continue to accept dates from other people. G is such a safe space for me to be goofy and relax.

No feelings of passion or romance have stirred inside me yet. Those have laid dormant since November and I fear every day they have been lost for good. I really hope not.

TOTALED MY CAR LMAO. It has been a shit two weeks ngl. I am just so lost but did all my dishes and felt hope in the world. I will find a job and I'll be okay. Argentina is so soon and I cannot wait!!!!

Went out to opera room with the crew friday to support my friend who is a DJ. She did great but saw several ops. Confronted this one dude who I know has been talking shit and spreading rumors and he apologized. Also talk to Emma - graces recent ex to make sure she knew even though it's weird and uncomfortable there is no bad blood and I have 0 issues with her. That went well and we ended the convo with a hug.

Today we had a soccer game and won then O and I took a nap and when we woke up me, Ethan, and Gracie went and got pizza. Zach!!!! A tender man who I fumbled 2/3 years ago which I will always regret WAS WORKING THERE!!!! I saw him and went outside and waited lmao. He has a beautiful gf of like 1 or so years now and I'm glad he is happy.

we all got ice cream after and I chose the rankest flavor called blueberry basil. Tasted like a salad dressing RIP. Got home drank Diet Coke and smoked on the porch and now Im catching up on writing and thoughts before watching 500 days of summer and going to sleep! Feeling settled and content.

#april 2024 #life

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astroninaaa · 4 years

Note

how can you like bakugou but hate clarke griffin? he's way worse than her lol

MFIWOSNOQ NEVER IN MY ENTIRE LIFE I THOUGHT I WOULD BE ASKED THAT BUT I KINDA DIG THIS QUESTION OKAY LET’S GO

okay so: clarke and bakugou are completely different characters. the context to their stories and characters is widely different and therefore you can’t exactly apply the same criteria to the both of them, but i totally get where you’re coming from, so i’ll try to somehow explain why bakugou works for me and makes me like him and clarke just....... doesn’t

first things first: clarke sucks. i have made an entire post about that and about why i don’t like her. she’s selfish and a bad person and a murderer. i have never liked her. however, what REALLY takes the cake for me is the fact she was supposed to be one of the good guys. killing people? she did it for her people. betraying her people? she did it for her daughter. torturing her daughter? she did it for......... well she must have a reason! it pisses me off. if she was made out to be a villain, i would probably actually like her, but she isn’t, and that’s so frustrating. clarke griffin is a bad person AND a bad character but the writers want me to see her as a hero or whatever. she isn’t! she sucks! i hate her! yay!

also she’s stupid as fuck and always makes bad decisions and uhhhhh she ANNOYS me to no end!!! and the fact the fandom always makes excuses for her behavior makes me even angrier so yeah. i do think she could be one of my favorite characters if her character arcs weren’t always fucks up → kills people → gives weak ass apologies → cries → acts dramatically → is forgiven → fucks up again. if she was written as an anti-hero, she would be AMAZING, but the writing on the 100 is too bad for that LMAOOOO

now, about bakugou: he’s a piece of shit. he’s cruel, and mean, and an asshole. he treats others like shit and thinks he’s better than everyone, and his treatment of midoriya is simply unacceptable. if i ever saw someone like him irl, i would jumpkick his ass IMMEDIATELY. he’s TERRIBLE. but (here it comes), he’s such an interesting character. he is a horrible person and yet his biggest goal is to become the number one hero, to save others. he’s a little bitch and still he’s one of the smartest and strongest characters in bnha, and rarely fails to act when needed (see the USJ incident). he’s a selfish, stubborn prick, and he’s fighting for the good side. i don’t think he’s a good person, because he’s not, and he should’ve definitely be held responsible for his mistakes and seeing midoriya punch him in the end of season 2 was INCREDIBLY satisfying, and i do admit he sucks, too! less than clarke bc he never commits genocide like she does (lmao), but he is indeed a jerk that we naturally would think of as a villain or anti-hero.

he is not a villain or an anti-hero, tho. he’s a bully and an asshole, yes, but he’s a hero. he’s training to be a hero just like the other main characters and i think that’s amazing. the contradictions within his character make him SO interesting to me and that’s why i like him. he’s not an usual character and i love it, i love how they made someone who would normally be a bad guy a hero. i think it’s really nice and fresh and he’s SUCH a good comic relief oh my GOD i laugh SO MUCH at him. and that’s what his character was made for. i haven’t finished bnha yet, i’m still on the beginning of season 3, but, until now, i haven’t seen anyone trying to make him seem nice and soft and misunderstood. no, he’s just a bastard, and, damn, i love it. the way his character is built is very absorbing and capvating to me, and so i like him, even tho i still see that he’s a terrible person. also, he never cries around bc people don’t like him or don’t trust him. he’s legit just vibing and being his angry self all around lmao

meanwhile, clarke is made out to be the good guy and is constantly trying to manipulate the other characters into thinking she’s great. bakugou never tries to be seen as anything other than the bitch ass he is or gives out backhanded apologies to make others like him or whatever

so yeah! that’s why i like bakugou and hate clarke. everyone is allowed to have their own opinions so it’s absolutely fine if you disagree but......... this is it basically? this got a lot longer than i expected but afhoewfnowhf yeah!! lmao

edit: what i said in the beginning about different criteria for the two characters → they are made in different universes with different norms and different standards. besides, bakugou is a child and clarke is a grown woman (at least during the later season), soooooo

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candyredmusings · 2 years

Text

Grubba Gang Sentence Starters

aka shit my discord squad has said. Periodically updated.

Mostly crack + NSFT.

“STOP BEING HORNY!”

“I’M NOT BEING HORNY STOP GASLIGHTING ME!”

“Santa isn’t real and Jesus never happened.”

“CLEAR YOUR SCHEDULE BABY WE’RE GOING TO YANDERE DIVORCE COURT.”

“I’ll be having evil intercourse.”

“I prostate myself jingling miserably on the floor for nothing.”

“God I would stab a man for a dorito.”

“How many people have you put in Jigsaw traps? I’m not a cop by the way.”

“Wish my mans would call me Slupert Doobert.”

“THANKS! I’M GOING TO SMITE YOU FOR YOUR HUBRIS NOW!”

“Shut the fuck up none of you can truly understand barbie horse adventures mystery ride.”

“Bold of you to presume we talk about anything except getting nut in here.”

“ALL I WANTED WAS TO GET RAWED ON THE FIRST DATE AND YOU SAID NO LIKE SOME FUCKING GENTLEMAN-”

“My vore gets me bitches.”

“ [Name] we’re gonna watch the barbie movies and im gonna sell my nudes.”

“I don’t know about you but Santa Claus could SMASH.”

“Just kidding. I want to pull you apart like a twizzler.”

“Sometimes I crave that real flesh.”

“One minute you’re talking about nutting the next you’re talking about when you were 6 year olds and first learned the feeling of betrayal.”

“Gnomes WILL be held accountable for their crimes.”

“ Tsk. No cloaca. No meaning.”

“Are you gonna eat your girls pussy like some sort of democrat, or vore her like a man?”

“ I am the clown that entertains this nuclear wasteland of comedy.”

“Are you thinking about the gnome party?”

“[NAME] if there’s ONE thing i know about you it’s that you don’t wear pants unless absolutely necessary.”

“Damn. It was never as easy as blues clues made it seem!”

“I’m going to fucking cain and abel you.”

“IM REQUIRED BY LAW TO SUCK HIS DICK NOW-”

“Your ass is grass and I’m an ape.”

“Hey anyone wanna fuck.”

“Not to flex on you but im something of a manlet.”

“I’m on a sexual clown journey.”

“Post the image, you stupid fruit.”

“God I gotta say I do love being me sometimes? Because I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me.”

“It’ll be fine. Ain’t you ever seen Hamilton?”

“Can we stop talking about my asshole?”

“It has been 2 days since our last slur.” / “it’s been 0 days since our last slur.”

“I’m ‘bout to be real with you, chief, I’m bout to bust them fucking kneecaps.”

“Will my life ever know peace?”

“Let’s just say if I had to see [NAME] in a police line up, well, I hope they can’t see through the mirror.”

“Let’s just say if I had to see Mr. Blobby in a police line up, well, I hope they can’t see through the mirror.”

“What the absolute FUCK have I walked into.”

“[NAME] comes within five feet of my pussy and I have to beat them away with a pool noodle.”

“I want cock. Now.”

“Shut the fuck up [NAME] there’s girls here!”

“IS [NAME] IN HEAT?”

“WE’VE BEEN ARGUING OVER [NAME]’S FEET FOR THREE DAYS.”

“Yes, love of my life? My Pizza Hut pan pizza? My 2 for 4 deal?“

“I’m probably gonna get hate for this, but, [NAME] is an absolute snacc.”

“You’re right. You are going to get hate.”

“For the love of God shut the fuck up.”

“In the past 24 hours you have said several horrible things to me.”

“I also want to see fat demon cock.”

“Gra ta ta swag bitch.”

“I’M HERE TO GET SEXUAL.”

“Please don’t call [NAME] sexy ever again.”

“Shut up, fruit.”

“GOD IS MY BITCH AND HE SUCKED MY DICK BEHIND A 7/11.”

“[NAME] I love you but what are you doing man?”

“Eat or I’ll send Steve Harvey after you.”

“I wanna be rammed so hard my anal cavity prolapses.”

“[NAME] if it was life or death would you yank the dildo outta my ass?”

“What’s the lore behind a dildo being in your ass and someone will die of circumstances because of it?”

“ NO!! THE POPE CANT BE HORNY!!”

“Don’t get me wrong, Lola bunny could take a jack hammer to my nuts and I’d thank her, but she also is the best basketball player ever.”

“[NAME]’s exquisite boobs will not protect him from feral [NAME] and that is a promise!”

“whats a little cum inflation among friends”

“On fridays we gaslight our white boys for enrichment.”

“Ain’t that the shit the lucky charms dude says? If you wanna find the fruit you gotta suck-o me nut? …or maybe thats fruit loops.“

"He’s shown feet, the next logical step is ass"

“[NAME] I got money on you crying right now. Not to freak you out, but -”

“I have RED VELVET in my BIG ASS TITTIES”

"Give this child a prison uniform I’m tired of him."

"Theres only so much i can do to stop white people"

“I DON’T CARE ABOUT SQUIRTING [NAME]”

"I LOVE ARGUING WITH MEN OVER THE INTERNET. MY PORES ARE CLEAR."

“I died in a tragic lip gloss accident and only by the grace of god do i live on.”

“You will never match his swag.”

“Hannibal is always based?”

“You know who else eats people? Christians. Grow up.”

“He’s gender-nonconforming as fuck with those eyelashses"

“I just fucked yo’ bitch in my Gucci clown drip.”

“She is to marry what we in the business call a little fucking freak.”

“TRY GETTING A JOB AT SCOOPS AHOY NOW YOU LITTLE FUCKING BASTARD!”

“The goal of art is to piss off as many people as possible.”

“I don’t know why I do the things I do, [NAME].”

"YOU HAVE THE GALL. TO COMPARE BEETHOVEN TO THE FUCKING BEATLES?!?"

“ I got heckled to sing Rainbow Connection."

“Do I make you horny, baby?”

“ WOW I GET IT! YOU’RE A WHORE I SEE NOW!”

“Wow, he looks like shit. I could suck him silly.”

“I could suck him silly.”

“Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry. Mommy? Sorry.”

"I could change jfk… WAIT AM I MARILYN MONROE?"

“Im so used to jumping in front of the gun that i didn’t realize the gun wasn’t loaded.”

“ this guy is like PG13 Hannibal. “

“you met me at a very frank floppa time in my life.”

"To put it simply you are the cave full of bluntsmoken and the world is your little german boy OoOO"

"I WANT YOUR GODDAMN SLOPPY JUST GIVE ME A MINUTE” -

“oh do not call him that ill cum on the spot”

“FUCK OFF. YOU’RE SICK.”

“NO ONE EMBARASS ME IN FRONT OF THE DOG!!”

“I don’t know why I do the things I do, [NAME].”

“well that was nice im gonna go walk some more until i die now"

"Love will always triumph."

”[NAME] BECAME ALLOSEXUAL FOR VENOM, WHY CAN’T YOU?“

”[NAME] BECAME ALLOSEXUAL FOR [NAME], WHY CAN’T YOU?“

"the fist of ‘87 thats what they call me.”

“the WORST SEX youve ever seen”

“My god i would shampoo his ball hair with my saliva …”

“ALL I HAD WAS LACTATION!"

“I’m Catholic so of course I rejected help, but and however…“

"i am a feminist and a woman-lover but first and foremost i am a hater"

"i love women but some of these bitches are boring-"

“I FAILED AT BECOMING RACIST.”

"YOURE NOT VAN GOGH BITCH!!!!"

“ i need cocaine ................. “

"........What Are We DOING?"

"If you were a pickle I'd eat you but i'd still love you”

“YOUR MENTAL ILLNESS MAKES YOU OBSESS OVER BOYS WELL MY MENTAL ILLNESS MAKES ME OBSESS OVER YOUR MENTAL ILLNESS.”

“bigfoot is sexy, [NAME]”

“you know what?? friendship IS magic.”

"i would suck off any of my friends"

“when gods choir sings, will bigfoot not be among them?”

“Call [NAME] a wedding cake the way im paying women to sit on him.”

“I WAS CHURNING THY BUTTER.”

“Hon hon baguette go to hell.”

“Avert thine lustful eyes away from my daughter, fiend.”

"AS A SOCIETY we should be making sure that women do not do be dying!!!"

“How many innuendos can we make in 3 minutes?”

“Yeah, no, I’m not in the habit of dropping slurs casually. I do it competitively.”

“She’s cute! Can’t wait to watch her get spitroasted.”

“We serve cunt here, sir.”

“Bitch I don’t like milk. Its White. Its NASTY—”

“I’m not going to suck him silly. This is serious to me.”

"if [NAME] looked like a drowned rat they wouldnt get nearly as much love.”

“Yes girl we explore Jesus.”

“i work in the tuberculosis ward, and I do occasionally peak into the polio ward but I won't go into the small pox ward ykwim”

“i hate penis when it’s normal you know what i mean”

“WHO THE FUCK HATED ON MY AUTISTIC SHAWTY”

“You’re afraid of unsalted nut but allow white penis into your body”

“I’m doing research on the clitoris”

"He has the gentle eyes of a baby cow and the face of bacon and he's my BEST FRIEND. "

#roleplay memes #inbox memes #sentence starters #rp prompts #inbox prompts #decided 2 take this off one of my rp blogs n put it here 2 be more easily accessible and not #clog my blog's notifs w this every time #POAKSDJF #candyredtext

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mynameisnowwyrm · 4 years

Text

Spoiler warning

TL;DR horrible adaptation, but very enjoyable on it’s own

(Also just wanted to say I was so sure I was going to hate this bc of what’s different but they changed so much the cartoon and the live action are barely connected in my head)

Okay my review will be split up into two parts: fate: the winx saga as an adaptation and as a standalone work

As an adaptation:

0/10. Maybe 0.5 if I’m being generous.

The things that were unchanged from winx club:

There are characters named Bloom, Stella, Musa, Aisha, Sky and Riven

Aisha, Bloom, Stella and Sky resemble their cartoon counterparts

Riven is an asshole

Bloom is a dumbass

Magic exists

The specialists exist

Main characters go to schools for magic and specialists respectively

The dragon flame is a thing

Witches exist

Other than that it’s a completely different show. The plot vaguely resembles season 1 of winx club only in that Bloom is trying to discover her true heritage. Musa, who is supposed to of East Asian descent is not, Flora was not included and in her place is a different character with similar powers, Tecna was excluded entirely ( I believe this was to distance the show from the futuristic elements of winx club and focus only on fantasy, which doesn’t make sense since they changed Musa’s powers ).

The magic system was changed. Fairies don’t on the regular transform since in the show the know-how to do so was lost, though Bloom does unlock the ability in the finale. Instead of each being a fairy of an individual concept, everyone’s powers ale element based, with Musa’s powers being changed to her being an empath. While this does feel more generic, it makes more sense from a world building perspective and I can see why they changed it.

The fashion is horrible. You will never be able to convince me teenagers dress like that. One of the reasons the original cartoon was enjoyable was all the colourful, fun clothing. The clothes feel dated and too mature for the characters, like I can see a twenty-something person in 2013 wear some of those outfits. It especially feels like a missed opportunity since 2000’s fashion is coming back into style.

The characterization of some of the characters compared to winx club was hit and miss. Riven was an ass and Bloom was impulsive and naive, which is accurate, but Stella, oh Stella was a disappointment. Stella was a jealous, manipulative bitch, which in context of her character backstory makes sense, but is so far from her original portrayal. Cartoon Stella was spoiled and at times self centered, but she was also genuinely kind, helpful and bubbly. To see her character take a 180 and become the all too familiar jealous ex archetype was upsetting.

Now, aaaaall that being said, I don’t believe we should judge this as an adaptation. They changed so much that it is quite literally a new story. So let’s see how it stands up on it’s own.

Summary, taken from the wiki

The series tells the story of Alfea, a fictional boarding school where teenagers study. The world inside this universe is not only magical and full of monsters, but it is also a world of real teenagers who do the most common things: make friends and enemies, go out and of course... fall in love. They are eager to find their place in this world. This universe is different from the one we have all known for a long time.

The attention is focused on a group of proud teens, also well-designed female characters. Sometimes they are heroines, sometimes weak girls. Sometimes they are friends, sometimes rivals. Of course, they are not perfect, but they are real. A group of girls who did not know each other until they are included in the same team inside a school that is strange to them. They will meet forces that are beyond their control and things they do not understand. But, throughout the series, they will find themselves, form an indestructible bond, and transform into powerful and strong girls, ready to change not only the supernatural world, but also ours.

Character summary:

Bloom is a newly discovered fairy from the human world who is attending Alfea college in the otherworld. There she meets her new roommates: chatty Terra, athletic Aisha, uptight Stella and stand-offish Musa. She also meets Sky, Stella’s ex, who is training as a specialist.Shortly before coming to Alfea, Bloom discovers she has magic powers by almost burning her house down and killing her parents. She is distraught over this and it is why she is eager to gain control of her powers.It is discovered that Bloom is a changeling, a barbaric practice where a fairy baby is exchanged with a human one. This leads Bloom on a quest to discover her true heritage.

Musa is an empath, she can feel the feelings of everyone around her. To shut them out and escape she listens to music through her headphones. This leads to her initially coming off as uncaring when Terra tries to get to know her better.

Terra is an earth fairy with a particular talent for making plants grow. She is very nice and chatty, eager to make friends, but not afraid to stand up for herself. She struggles with finding someone to like her and compares herself to “cool girl” Beatrix who has boys following after her.

Aisha is a water fairy who swims twice a day every day. She comes off a a good person who wants to make friends and do the right thing. She also tries to do everything in her power to protect her friends.

Stella is a light fairy and princess of Solaria, the realm in which Alfea resides. She is repeating her first year due to an event prior to season one where she lost control of her powers and blinded her best friend. She is very uptight due to her perfectionist mother and tries to exert control in every other area of her life, when this doesn’t work, e.g. when someone flirts with her on-again-off-again boyfriend she gets jealous and causes trouble. She is also generally rude to the people around her.

Sky is a specialist legacy and Stella’s on-again-off-again boyfriend who has an interest in Bloom. His father was a famous specialist and he was raised by his father’s best friend.

Riven is Sky’s roommate, best friend and a genuine asshole. He insults and antagonizes everyone around him and gets involved with Beatrix. He seems dissatisfied with the life of a specialist.

Beatrix is an air fairy with a lightning powers. She seems mysterious and looks to be the villain of the season. She has enlisted the help of Riven and Dane.

Dane is a first year specialist who first seems to be friendly with Terra but gets sidetracked after spending time with Riven and Beatrix.

What I didn’t like:

The world building is sparse and the magic system is generic. I feel like things could have been better expanded upon. Throughout the show they bring up archaic fairy magic but it’s never really explained how that’s different from current fairy magic.

The interactions between Riven and Dane come off as a bit queerbait-y although they could be setting things up for a second season.

Everyone is constantly so rude towards Terra. Even her supposed friends are mean to her. What gives?

Stella was constantly rude to everyone but by the end they are all the best of friends when she really hasn’t changed much. Also Stella being the jealous controlling ex archetype and not enough people calling her out on her bullshit.

What I did like:

For a Netflix teen drama there is surprisingly little sex between the teenagers. This might be subjective but it was refreshing for me.

Again subjective but I could definitely relate to Bloom’s antisocial teen flashbacks

Beatrix was a fun villain

Though the story might be a little generic, I felt it was compelling throughout. I genuinely wanted to know what happened next.

The story was well paced. It never felt like anything was dragging along

Overall:

The show was definitely enjoyable to watch. There is a lot of room for improvement. It sometimes felt like different plot lines were unconnected and the costume choices leave a lot to be desired. Aside from that they set up a solid story and likable characters (some of whom I love love and love to hate) which I very much want to see further developed in the future. As a stand-alone work 6/10

#fate the winx saga #winx club #winx stella #winx bloom #winx sky #winx #winx riven #winx musa #winx terra #bad adaptation #good show #fate the winx saga review #winx review #fate the winx saga spoilers #winx spoilers

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floralseokjin · 4 years

Text

;cyber sex (m)

FIRST LOVE, LAST LOVE

⟨gif credit⟩

You want to partake in some “cyber” sex...

pairing; jeon jungkook x reader genre/warnings; smut, fluff, skype sex, or as oc puts it, cybersex, sex toy usage (here 😘) words; 3,038

more﹆chapter index

“Are your parents in bed?”

On the screen, Jungkook looked a little on edge, jittery almost. Like he was doing something illegal.

“My dad is. Mom’s downstairs catching up on soap operas.”

He still looked a little unsure. “How was your day?”

You shifted on your bed, crossing your legs, your laptop jumped slightly, pixelated Jungkook bouncing around for a second. Internet at your parents’ house had always been shitty but he still made a bunch of cute pixels.

“I’d love to small talk, Jungkook, I really would, but I woke up wanting sex and have been horny ever since.”

You were expecting him to log on all eager and possibly already halfway to naked, but he’d appeared in sweats, back against the headboard of your shared bed, legs stretched out where laptop you was placed on his thighs.

You watched him hesitate and grew annoyed. “What happened to being up for this?”

This afternoon he’d been eager, possibly even cocky when you’d texted him over lunch. Your mom gossiping in your ear about her co-worker’s so called affair while you passively listened and arranged sex plans with your boyfriend...

There had been a time you were too embarrassed to even think about masturbating in your family home, but like Jungkook kept saying, you were a grown ass woman now, not still in high school or even in college. Those days had long past you by. You were a hot blooded female with needs. Needs for your super hot, super sweet boyfriend. There was really no need to be ashamed. You were going to participate in some cyber sex, no matter how much Jungkook laughed at your awkward phrasing.

[You: 01:34pm] Are you busy tonight?

[JK: 01:36pm] if eating cheetos in bed by 8 is busy then yes

[You: 01:37pm] Don’t you dare bitch

[JK: 01:37pm] why do you want to know if im busy?

[You: 01:38pm] cybersex 2300 hours

[JK: 01:38pm] Cybersex 😭😭 no one calls it that weirdo but see you there my morning wood misses yoir ass

Here right now, Jungkook made a noise, arguing with you. “I am up for this. It’s just your parents...”

You rolled your eyes. He was a grown ass man and he was afraid of your parents. More so your dad. He’d taken a while to warm up to Jungkook—you blame the tattoos. But that was years ago when you’d first started dating. Your dad liked Jungkook now. Honest.

“My dad’s asleep. I can hear him snoring,” you commented, giggling.

Jungkook groaned. Way to ruin the mood, he was probably thinking. “That doesn’t help.”

“Come ooonnn,” you whined, leaning into the screen. You knew your robe was dipping in the middle, already tied deliberately lose. He had a great view of your cleavage, however muted because of the shitty lamp lighting. “I miss youuuu.”

Jungkook scoffed quietly. “And you’re making it worse. I wanna touch you for real.” He was speaking low, pouting really, but you caught his hand that slid across the front of his sweatpants. Was that some inconspicuous rubbing you’d spotted? Naughty.

You leant back again and tried not to grin in triumph. Jungkook 0, your tits 1 once again.

He carried on his rant. “I want you in this bed. In this house. I can’t wait 4 more days!”

Diddums. He was a child, you swore. “Should’ve come with me then.”

He was rubbing his crotch again, you didn’t think he realised he was doing it. “You know that’s only reserved for a Christmas every two years.”

Yeah, like you said, he was terrified of your father. It was probably why he hadn’t proposed yet, too scared to ask for your dad’s blessing. Not that you would say that to his face. And not like you wanted to get married anytime soon, it was just only natural to think of those things. You had been together for years after all.

You didn’t reply, instead shifting on the bed once more to spread your legs a little. You hiked one up, robe falling open to reveal the triangle of skin between your legs. You meant business.

“What’re you doing?” He practically stuttered, sitting up straighter against the headboard.

“I’m not wearing any underwear.”

“I can see that.”

You began to rub the pad of your index finger across your clit. Sensitivity shocking your body and you fought with yourself not to snap your legs closed. You softened the impact, slowly circling before slipping down your folds and collecting the moisture to drag back up to your clit. Agonisingly slow now because you wanted to tease the hell out of your boyfriend. Despite the near darkness, he had eyes like a hawk. “You’re wet already.” Maybe he could see it glistening through the camera. Or maybe he was just starting his descent…

“Like I said, I’ve been horny since this morning.” You ever so slightly dipped the tip of your finger inside yourself. You couldn’t remember the last time you’d played with yourself like this in front of him. It was fun. Especially because he was hanging onto each movement like his life depended on it.

“Jungkook,” you nudged.

“Mm?” It was just one sound, too far gone now.

You murmured the next part, voice low and heavy, laced with a desperateness you’d felt all day. “Get your dick out.”

He didn’t argue. You let yourself grin in victory, ogling him as pushed a hand into his sweatpants and pulled out that thick, hot cock you’d been fantasising about since 7am.

He ran his fist along it, definitely not lazily. Tugging at the head, his thumb rubbed the drops of precum across his slit. You clenched and pulsed down below. Unfair move. Your image of him was grainy and unlit but he looked just as hot as he always did. Maybe it was time to unveil your secret weapon...

“Goodnight, love.”

You jumped immediately at the sound of your mom’s voice, hand jerking away from between your legs. You’d been so distracted you hadn’t even heard her coming up the stairs.

Your took a quick breath and tried to sound normal, praying you could keep your voice level. “Goodnight mom!” You succeeded, but only just you were sure of it.

You heard the click of the bathroom door and turned your attention back to Jungkook, eyes wide. His were too. “Jesus christ,” he muttered, sounding annoyed. “This was a dumb idea.” He was sat forward, dick back in his pants, tops of his cheeks rosy, either from the jerking off or the near close call. Probably both.

You tried to refrain from giggling but failed. “She wasn’t going to just barge in here.”

Both waiting a few seconds, it wasn’t long before your mom exited the bathroom and shut the door to her bedroom. You untied your robe, relaxing into the bed instantly. You weren’t losing this moment.

Jungkook groaned slightly, eyes apprehensively raking over your practically naked body. “This is so wrong.”

“Relax, we’re alone,” you insisted. “Just remember to be quiet.” You’d use your earphones but you’d forgotten them, remembering as soon as you’d boarded the plane.

“I’m alone.” He corrected, now sounding sorry for himself. Jeez, it was as if you weren’t spread out like a human buffet. “I miss you. Can’t you come home right now?”

Jungkook did not do well at being alone at all. It was cute. You smiled at him softly, running your hand down your stomach and between your legs. “But I wanna cum right nowww.”

“Fine.” His stare hardened, watching the way you rubbed at the bundle of nerves. “You cum and then come home. Then I fuck you. Properly. None of this Skype shit.”

You laughed, genuinely amused. He was such a baby. You watched him lift his t-shirt over his head. Taking initiative, you liked that. His hair fell in his eyes and he shook it away. He’d finally had a haircut a few weeks ago, but it grows fast, which was possibly a good thing because you really, really missed that long hair of his.

Your eyes fell down to his chest and across his shoulders. He had a few tattoos that decorated his torso, amongst other places, but they mainly covered his arms. Speaking of which you clenched and pulsed again, just imagining those arms wrapped around you, squeezing you tight, hands pinning you to the bed... Shit. You really wanted to fuck him for real.

You splayed around against the bedsheets, arching your back a little and Jungkook raised an eyebrow. “Take your robe off. Keep your bra on.” He sounded demanding, it wasn’t intentional, lost to the urge right now as usual, but you loved it when he ordered you about, even more so when he didn’t realise he was doing it.

You quickly got to it, snapping at your bra straps as you lied back down, propped up by your elbows. “Is this actually sexy?” You’d done this a handful of times but that was back in college. Now older, it seemed more daunting.

“Of course it is, babe,” Jungkook reassured. On cue he got his cock out again. He was still hard.

You watched him rake his hand along himself a few times and then grinned. “I have something.”

He raised an eyebrow again, curious but also clueless, and watched you pull something out from under the sheets. A glittery, rubbery thing that made his eyes light up.

“You brought a dildo to your parents’ house?” He asked after a split second of silence. You nodded, biting down on your lip, holding the specimen up to the screen. He caught the look on your face and chuckled. “You planned this?” He sounded impressed.

“Thought it would be fun.” You tried to sound casual but maybe you were a little nervous? Embarrassed? There was no need to be. You’d had a sexual fantasy and had acted on it... Jungkook was just as into it. Hm, maybe it was the being naked over cam that was making you feel so jittery?

Jungkook eyed Miss Jessica Rabbit and laughed again. “Only you would arrange a visit to your parents’ place just so we could participate in some ‘cybersex’.”

Joking aside, he was eager to begin. You could tell by the look in his eyes and by the way he’d straightened his back, leaning in closer for a better look. You didn’t feel nervy anymore. You were back in the zone.

“Cybersex sounds cool, I don’t know why you find it so funny.”

Jungkook rolled his eyes affectionately. “You’re adorable, that’s why I find it so funny.”

“Lameee.” You sang. But now you were running the head of the vibrator along your slit, spreading your legs in the process.

Jungkook watched you carefully, still stroking his dick with leisure. “I’m surprised you didn’t get caught at security with that thing.” He was making casual conversation but his voice sounded strained. He kept having to swallow. “Hiding a giant vibrator in your clothing.”

“Can you imagine?” You’d die of embarrassment right there on the spot.

“I‘d come bail you out, don’t worry.”

You giggled at his silliness. Who was going to tell him you couldn’t get arrested for carrying a vibrator in your luggage?

However, soon the mood for small talk was over, only distracting at this point. Or maybe what was distracting was now the vibrator beginning to stretch out your insides. It was a little uncomfortable at first, maybe you were just too well aware your parents were a few feet away, or maybe you were just out of practice when it came to fucking yourself.

Jungkook helped though, whispering encouragements and giving you useful tips, which only made you wetter; so yes, a huge help. It wasn’t long before you got a rhythm going, not long before your breathing quickened and you were trying really hard not to moan out loud.

Jungkook matched your movements, now jerking himself off with vigour. You watched one another, fully at ease and lost in your own little world.

“This is so unfairrr,” he grunted soon enough, burning a hole between your legs. His newly sworn enemy, Miss Jessica Rabbit. “I want my dick inside you, not some phoney.”

You moaned quietly, agreeing of course. Nothing felt as good as Jungkook inside you. Nothing ever had. You clicked a button on the toy and the first level of vibrations started.

You lifted your head a little, trying to gauge the sound. “Is that too loud?”

He shook his head. “I think you’re good. Fuck.” He cursed because you were now grinding up against the ears of the bunny, vibrations against your clit sending you all gooey and warm. “Go faster.”

You listened, the length of the vibrator now slipping in fully as your insides finally loosened up, no longer tense. You rolled to your side a little and like that you found your g-spot. Pleasure began to burst behind your eyes and you almost forgot Jungkook was there because now you’d remembered how to use this damn thing and there was no going back.

You clicked another button, powering up the shaft as the pearls inside the rubber began to rotate. You bit down on your lip, desperate not to make a sound and you cursed yourself. Why did you think this was a good idea? Pleasure screamed at you but you must keep quiet.

“Babe... Baby,” Jungkook was trying to get your attention. “Baby, get on your back again. I wanna see.”

You slowly listened, knowing you had been restricting his view and try to fuck yourself on your back. You planted your feet on the bed, kicking the laptop to the centre in the process and hoped now that he had a good view.

Whatever he saw, he liked, moaning maybe a little bit too loudly. You’d turn the volume down if you could move, but you can’t, too paralysed with pleasure. “This is so fucking hot.” He was legit growling, it sent a fire through your veins.

He watched you buck your hips into the vibrator over and over again, struggling a little to keep thrusting the shaft inside of you, but you think he found that hot. You were close. You knew it. Lips spread apart, your clit was swollen and greedy for pleasure, sensitive to the titillating vibrations and your walls squeezed and began to spasm around the thick rubber, the rotating sensation you felt making you tremble all over. Your wrist hurt but it was a good kind of pain, burning, making you work hard for your release.

“Wish you were here to fuck me better, baby,” you purred, because despite how amazing this felt Jungkook could make you feel a pleasure ten times greater. “Does your hand feel good?“

You couldn’t see him, flat on your back, eyes shut, face directed at the ceiling, but you could hear the sound of skin on skin. His palm raking up and down the rock hard flesh of his cock.

“Don’t rub it in,” he chided, voice low. Ha. Because that was exactly what he was doing. Luckily you were too out of breath to drop a shit pun.

Your lower half suddenly spasmed and you stifled a cry. You couldn’t hold on any longer. “Shit,” you gasped. “I forgot how strong this thing was.”

“Yeah? I’ll cum if you cum.”

That’s all you needed to hear. It wasn’t even five seconds later before you were coming. Like an explosion, thigh and vagina muscles clenching, toes curling into the sheets and your chest heaving, sweat beading at your hairline. Miraculously you managed to stay silent. Albeit your breathing. You ceased movement immediately, removing the pressure against your clit before turning the vibrations off. The shaft was still rotating inside you, nerves twitching in your thigh before you ended those too and slid the vibrator out with a silent pop. You threw it to your side. Your whole body tingled but you urged yourself to come to, to open your eyes and lean up on your elbows. Jungkook still needed to cum and you wanted to watch. Just like he watched you.

“Good, baby?” He asked. His eyes were black, breathing shallow. His fist still tugged at his dick, desperate now.

“Mm hm,” you nodded, feeling a little chilly now the thrill had worn off.

Jungkook grunted a command. “Spread your legs a little. I’m close.” You listened without question, giving him what he wanted.

You watched the veins protrude from his forearms, some painted black with the ink of his tattoos. The hand not wrapped around his cock cupped his balls ever so slightly, tugging on them a little before he tensed and groaned. The first spurt of cum shot out and landed on his stomach, then another, it slipped into the lines of his abs. The third load slowed and he tugged his fingers tight across the tip, over and over again, draining each drop. It thickened in the air and slid down his length, getting on his fingers too. You observed all this greedily. What a sight to behold.

A couple of tissues later for him and your robe tied back around your body, you were both grinning and giggling like a pair of idiots together, still on a high.

“We need to incorporate that into the real deal more,” Jungkook said, referring to the vibrator now stood on your bedside table. “Let me be in charge.”

“It’s got to make its way back home first,” you joked.

You had climbed into bed by now, welcoming the warmth and annoyingly your eyes started to feel heavy.

“You tired?” Jungkook noticed straight away.

“I can stay up a little longer,” you insisted, wanting to chat with him before you fell asleep. A text or a phone call just wasn’t the same, and even though it’s only been a few days, you missed him like crazy. “What did you eat for dinner?” You asked, making small talk.

He raised both eyebrows, eyes wide. “Do you really want me to answer that?”

No, probably not. You knew the answer already.

It was always a ramen diet for Jungkook when you were away...

Written 2020. Please refrain from posting my work elsewhere. No translations allowed. © floralseokjin 2020

#jungkook smut #bts smut #jungkook fanfic #bts fanfic #floralseokjin:writings #fic:flll

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lilyharvord · 3 years

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Just reread queen song and now I’m depressed 🤪✌️ I’d love to hear your thoughts on Coriane. You always have such in depth thoughts about everything and you are the RQ fandom Oracle/ source of head cannons and I love everything you do. So like yeah what do you think about her and her entire story basically. Kisses

I apologize, but this answer is about to be like this:

Coriane is my baby. I regret that I have treated her so poorly by not working on Song to the Phoenix like I should be. She deserves so much, and deserves to have her story told. I love that we got a novella about her, because what people may or may not know from my past posts about her: I think she is one of the 4 most important women in the series and she's dead before it even begins. Everything Cal does in War Storm (and even in the rest of the books) is shaped by her. Mare actually says at one point in Red Queen that both her and Julian are holding onto her like she is some ghost of Coriane, and that is so fucking telling throughout the first book. Also Her portrait being in the outer room of Cal's chambers in WS, Julian's reaction to it, CAL'S reaction by putting it in that room and not with him. Her Diary coming back (while being the biggest fucking plot hole I've seen since whatever the heck SJM was doing in all her books) is so freaking important. The fact that at the end of the day, it is her words that push Cal to make the decision he has been desperately seeking validation for, is without a doubt the most profound shit ever.

I also thinks she's a wonderful foil for Elara? Because both she and Elara in War Storm get to speak to their respective son's from beyond the grave (whether VA meant for us to notice this is beyond me, whatever, I did.), but we can see how there are two very different tones being used:

Elara's=manipulation, power, violence which ultimately leads to Maven's downfall.

Coriane's=peace, compassion, love which ultimately leads to Cal's survival and the survival of Norta/The States.

She IS THE SINGLE MOST IMPORTANT CHARACTER (besides Mare, whose story RQ belongs to) because HER Story is what initiates everything. Her marriage to Tibe is what drives Elara to unfathomable, horrible violence (by driving Coriane to suicide) and then taking the throne. The birth of HER son is what drives Elara to have Maven and push him to be everything Cal is while physically pulling him apart and destroying him thereby creating the villain of the series. She is the perfect foil to Elara. And IT GIVES ME NEVER ENDING PLEASURE TO KNOW THAT.

I will DIE on the hill that if she had lived, there never would never have been a war with the Guard. She would have pushed for them to be noticed and heard. She would have been put out by Mare at first, but in time would have learned to respect this young woman with a backbone of steel and an eye for trouble. She would have stood by Cal and any decision he made to abdicate.

She was never allowed the chance to be strong, and in the moments she tried in Queen's Song she wobbles. She has 0 self-assurance because no one bothered to give the poor girl any. Like holy shit, dont even get my started on my thoughts that Tibe practically uses her like an ornament. If he actually loved her, he would not have married her knowing what she went through, knowing she wasn't the happiest person. Like holy shit. He put a massive bright red target on her back that said; Hey, please chew me up and spit me out. And didn't do anything to help her handle that. Jesus I hate him for that. Julian is terrible too! He just said: welp, sorry. AND KEPT HER ASS IN THE DARK ABOUT THINGS SHE DESERVED TO KNOW ABOUT??!! UGH.

Since it's taking me forever to get ANYTHING done for Song of the Phoenix I will tell you that there is a part, where Coriane actually tells someone (not be named because well... eh fuvk it... it's Tibe) to shut up and listen to her for just once, and the whole room goes silent and she just squares her shoulders (even though it terrifies her to be standing up to him) and pretty much tells him that she knows more and that if he knew anything, he would know to shut up and listen to her unlike how he acted when they were married. And Mare is over in the corner pretty much standing up on her chair waving glowsticks, shooting a confetti cannon, and holding up her drink like YOU GO BITCH.

Coriane's main goal in SotP for me is not only self-actualization but also self-assurance. Now, this by no means cancels out her depression, or the hole she was in, but it can help her deal with it. She deserves to feel and be strong, unlike all the characters in Queen's Song (INCLUDING TIBE) who made her feel lesser or smaller. I think if she were allowed the space to, she would have become a great Queen, a compassionate, powerful Queen who would have raised a son that she would have been incredibly proud of. But alas, tis not what her story was and that is what makes it all the more tragic. Her depression is strong, and she was never giving the chance or the people around her to make her stronger than it.

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purrincess-chat · 3 years

Text

Cat’s Not-All-Encompassing Character Ranking

Okay, so I have to admit that I omitted a lot of characters I don't have strong opinions on. Most of them were one-off akumas, so don't get your panties in a twist, your faves are probably still on here (and ranked lower than you think).

As a preface again, these are just my personal opinions. They can't hurt you. You can still like characters more or less than me. And I don't care how you feel about them. This list is for me. And the person that asked for it. So shut up. Go make your own rank list if you’re so butthurt.

We're going in reverse order this time, starting from the bottom:

84. Gabriel Agreste- I mean, is anyone surprised? I am not private about how I think Gabriel should go to jail. Or fall off a cliff. Or be erased from existence. Rip to those that like him, but I’m different.

83. Thomas Astruc- Honestly, he’s down here on principle. Self-inserts are generally a no-no, and I just laugh every time I see him on screen because he really put himself in this show and said boohoo no one appreciates me XD

82. Bob Roth- I feel like this one should also be obvious. He’s just a dick. Terrible human. I give him 0 stars.

81. Tomoe Tsurugi- We all collectively hate her, right? It’s not just me?

80. Su Han- This mans has small peepee energy. And he bad mouthed Fu, so get FUCKED, my dude.

79. Rolland Dupain- Listen, I get it, he liked Marinette in the end, but I could do without the racism.

78. Nathalie Sancoeur- My opinion of Nathalie took a nosedive after the s2 finale. I just do not care that she is in love with her boss. Don’t care that she’s dying. Just do not have it in me.

77. XY- Justin Bieber ass wannabe.

76. Nora Cesiare- I didn’t care for Nora. I know Thomas loves her, but the overbearing sibling trope is tired.

75. Anarka Couffaine- I underestimated how much I don’t really like her. Like, it’s not full-on hate, but I just do not care for her.

74. Otis Cesaire- Got akumatized because a kid said he could outrun a panther. I’m still not over it, Otis.

73. Andre Bourgeois- No love for the crooked mayor. I hope your wife divorces you.

72. Alec Cataldi- The real villain of Stormy Weather. Like fr why is he such an asshole?

71. Roger Raincomprix- Is Officer Roger just doing his best? Sometimes. But like sometimes this mans just needs to take a chill pill.

70. M. D'Argencourt- Please get out of the 1600s

69. Ella/Etta- These two are basically the same character, and I am indifferent to both of them.

68. KnightOwl/Barbara- Listen, I would have liked you more if you were less controlling.

67. Majestia- Same as above, but like I guess I like you more

66. Theo- *Mean Girls principal voice* Stay away from underaged girls!

65. Andre the ice cream man- I just want a scoop of chocolate, Andre. Is that too much to ask??

64. Amelie Graham de Vanily- We haven’t seen much of her, but she seems like a snake bitch.

63. M. Kubdel- I mean, if my son wanted to resurrect an ancient mummy and believed in aliens, I’d give the family heirloom to my daughter too.

62. Jalil Kubdel- Lolol, buddy, pal, dude, my guy. Chill.

61. Vincent (Adrien's photographer)- Head empty. Mom’s spaghetti. Idk he’s alright.

60. Manon- I don’t hate Manon. She just gets on my nerves every time she talks.

59. M. Ramier- This mans got akumatized a billion times because he gets emotional about pigeons. I mean, honestly mood.

58. Mme. Mendeleiev- She doesn’t put up with Chloe’s shit, and we respect her for this.

57. Baby August- Someone just give this mans some food. He’s a growing boy.

56. Santa Claus- If I were Santa, I too would list Ladybug as the best kid in the world.

55. Art Teacher- He doesn’t even have a name, but I vibe with him. He seems like he likes to paint scenes of nature with his pet squirrels.

54. Prince Ali- Lil mans just wanted to have a good time. I can respect that.

53. Duusu- Duusu, I get that your Miraculous was broken, but get with the program, girl. You is a hostage.

52. Other Kwamis- Idk, all the ones we haven’t seen as much. I don’t have real opinions on them yet. Just neutral.

51. Sass- He gives me dad vibes.

50. M. Damocles- You go, you funky owl man

49. Jean (Chloe's Butler)- He deserves a raise. What is your name, sir? We may never know.

48. Mireille Caquet- She’s pretty cute. No complaints.

47. Aurore Beaureal- Baby’s first akuma. I love her design. She’s a cutie.

46. Claudie Kante (Max’s mom)- This womans just wanted to go to space and live her dream. We stan a hardworking queen.

45. Hot Dog Dan- I like him more than Andre the ice cream fraud. Sure, my hotdog might turn me purple, but if I ask for chili on it, I bet he’d oblige.

44. Nadja Chamack- I mean, she’s doing her best.

43. Audrey Bourgeois- So, as I said in the episode ranking, I have a love-hate relationship with Audrey. She’s the worst, but that’s why I love her. I love her ironically. Like, yeah she’s atrocious, but I just want to watch her burn the world.

42. Luka Couffaine- Directly in the middle, like he’s always been.

41. Nathaniel Kurtzberg- My opinion of Nath improved after Reverser surprisingly. I ship it.

40. Chris Lahiffe- I like Chris better than Ella/Etta. He’s just a little mans out here living life wanting to grow up. Don’t believe it, Chris. Stay little forever. Being an adult suuuuucks.

39. Fang the Crocodile- The goodest boy.

38. Nooroo- I just want to give him a hug.

37. Mlle. Bustier- She’s doing her best, but I mean, when ya whole class keeps getting turned into supervillains, I’m surprised she’s not an alcoholic.

36. Penny Rolling- I just like her. I think she’s neat.

35. Ondine- Mermaid queen! She’s so sweet, and I love her with Kim. I hope we see more of her in the future.

34. Marc Anciel- Marc is a little cutie bean. Idc if he’s based off one of Thomas’s irl friends. He can stay.

33. Wayzz- He loves Master Fu so much I cry.

32. Felix Graham de Vanily- I know everyone hates canon Felix, but tbh he exudes massive chaotic neutral gremlin energy, and I actually kinda vibe with that. And he pisses with his uncle which is a whole ass mood.

31. Tikki- Tikki is very cute, but bby please work on the preaching. You don’t always know what’s right, babe.

30. Sabrina Raincomprix- Sabrina deserves better. I hope we see good things happen for her.

29. Lila Rossi- Surprised? I actually like Lila. The first fic I ever wrote for this fandom was a Lila redemption. I think she is a good antagonist and foil to Marinette. I absolutely want to see her get dunked on in canon, but that doesn’t mean I hate her.

28. Wayhem- I don’t know why, but Wayhem makes me laugh. I love him XD

27. Uncle Cheng- He’s just a good mans with a birb who wants to make you tasty food. What’s not to like?

26. Trixx- Trixx shot up after GoS. Chaotic bean make Eiffel Tower go bendy

25. Jess- She’s pretty cool. She’s a vibe.

24. Aeon- The cutest bean!!! She saw Adrien and Marinette and said yep. Those two are meant to be together. Jess, we gotta make it happen.

23. Ivan Bruel- Ivan is such a gentle bean. We love him.

22. Mylene Haprele- Smol

21. Fei Wu- I still have not watched the Shanghai special with subs, but I liked her.

20. Gina Dupain- The grandma I aspire to be.

19. Marianne Lenoir- I love her. She is good. She and Fu are so cute. And she seems like she would have kicked le ass back in the day. (and even now)

18. Rose Lavillant- I am so excited for Pigella!! Rose is too cute. We love her.

17. Gorilla- aka Adrien’s real dad. If the series doesn’t end with Gabriel getting yeeted into the stratosphere and Gorilla adopting Adrien, I don’t want it.

16. Clara Nightingale- She’s in love with Marinette. You can’t change my mind. 16 is also how old I hc her to be, so don’t nobody come for me.

15. Tom Dupain- Most. Supportive. Dad. Soft bean. Just wants to make you fresh bread.

14. Sabine Cheng- Good mom vibes. We love to see her.

13. Juleka Couffaine- Shy goth bean. Just wants to have her picture taken. Definitely a lesbian. We stan.

12. Nino Lahiffe- The goodest boy. He’s just out here doing his best, loving his friends.

11. Chloe Bourgeois- Chloe is another one I have a love-hate relationship with. Her brattiness is funny to me. We had high hopes for her. Honestly, she ranks this high because I like to play with her in fic.

10. Max Kante- He smol and smort. And I adore his friendship with Kim and the fact that he made an AI himself at 14. What a legend.

9. Alya Cesaire- Rip to Alya salters, but I’m different. Outside of Chameleon, Alya is fine. She’s a supportive bff. All yall people that are mad she doesn’t kiss Marinette’s ass all the time need to go out and make real friends. I said what I said.

8. Alix Kubdel- I love Alix. I love how she is always so done with all the lovey-dovey bullshit. She is tiny queen, and Bunnix, while OP af, is still super cool. We love to see her.

7. Kagami Tsurugi- I will fight anyone who shits on Kagami. She has done nothing wrong, you guys are just haters. All she did was exist, and yall said, wow what a toxic bitch?? Disgraceful.

6. Jagged Stone- We are going to ignore the deadbeat dad trope that canon thrust upon him. He is a Marinette stan, and we love that.

5. Kim Le Chien- I really love Kim, you guys. Does that surprise you? Listen, my favorite male character types are sweet beans and himbos. Kim is both of these.

4. Master Fu- If you didn’t pick up on how much I love Fu from the episodes ranking, then idk what to tell you. I want him to be my grandpa. I would trust this mans with my life. He did his best. You paint those pictures, you funky little man. I love you.

3. Plagg- My galaxy trash man. Love him. 10/10 chefs kisses all around.

2. Adrien Agreste- The biggest Marinette stan there is. I just want him to kiss her on the face. And marry her. Idk, I just think that would be neat if he could do that. I just want good things for them.

1. Marinette Dupain-Cheng- Honestly, are you surprised? I have always been and always will be a Marinette stan. If you expected anyone else to be in this spot, then clown suit rentals are off to the left.

#cat speaks #cat spoils #character ranking #okay fr tho dont ever ask me for anything ever again #take your complaints to your dashboard button and off my blog #idc if you dont like my ranks #theyre not for you #heck off

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clearlyshyobservation · 4 years

Text

Kokichi is dying (V3 chatfic, no particular ship)

TW: Infers abuse, talks about ableism, neglect, panic attack pretty much, depression, self loathing. never being good enough

i am so sorry but vr au's need to be sad, love yall :)

(Background info: This is set in a vr au, they are not with their fake memory parents (Ie; kaito's kind grandparents) but rather why they really have)

(Also i have no fucking clue what ship i was going for???? pretty sure they are all on the table, and kokichi talks like an idiot in this and i love it. Gonta's writing is based off of his Japanese talking style, so no more caveman talking).

USERNAMES:

(Space monkey: Kaito, Detective pikachu: shuichi, Elton john: kaede, Antman: gonta, Mr. Gonstealyoman: korekiyo, Atua's bitch: angie, emoboi: ryoma, be-boop: kiibo, bread roll: Maki, cum dumpster: miu, mommy: kirumi, Gremlin: Kokichi)

TLDR: Chaos ensues, slight angst

Gremlin: omfg im fucking sicK im gonna fucking die i bet this was kaitos bitch ass fault for coughing on me with his tuberculosis headass gROSSSSS I HATE EVERYTHINGGG

Space Monkey: i-

Space monkey: I didn't get you sick dumbass,,,, my tb is fugckin cured bi-

Bread roll: he's dramatic and gross dont believe him

Gremlin: yall mean for what?

Gremlin: i have a life taking disease and yall laughing i-

Gremlin: see you at my funeral bitch

Detective pikachu: What are you sick with then

Gremlin: anythong bitch, im the universe

Antman: He sounds delusional, thats not good

Detective pikachu: He's always delusional, he's Kokichi

Mr. gonstealyoman: I guess this name is better than my old one

Mr. gonstealyoman: thank you kokichi :) I am glad we have come to an understanding

Gremlin: kay sexy

Gremlin: IGNRE WHAT I JUST SENT

Gremlin: IGNORE IT IGNORE IT IGNORE ITTTTT

Antman: who was that for???

Gremlin: NO ONE,,,

Gremlin: Okay,,, maybe sexy tall men in general lowkey

Gremlin: okay,,,, maybe anyone over 6 feet

Detective pikachu: i feel excluded

Detective pikachu: good, i don't like you kokichi, your an ass

Gremlin: u sound jelly shumaiiiiii

be-boop: perhaps he is telling the truth, you know,

be-boop: according to my data, in chapter four Shuichi stated that you will never have friends, and no one will ever like you

Gremlin: SHUT THE FUCK UP STOP MAKING ME FEEL BADBSKVKHDVKDSKJV

Antman: do you need me to come over? I can make you tea?

mommy: Do you know how to do that, Gonta? I can teach you?

Antman: Gonta does know, thank you very much.

Antman: Gonta is not a child, Tojo-chan, please don't regard me as one

Antman: Gonta can cook, can clean, can be gentle, and has his own mind

Space monkey: but we're just making sure man, cuz, you know,,,, chapter 4

Antman: I am capable of things just like you!!!!!

Antman: Gonta doesn't know why you guys treat me like a child :(

Gremlin: yeah, hot stuff over there is basically a prodigy homies

Antman: Gonta is dumb though, don't say that.

Antman: Gonta is no prodigy, in fact, he is below average in everything

Gremlin: Whats ur test scores bitch

Antman: Gonta got a 98 on my english test,, but i wanted a 100, which would make Gonta actually smart :(

Antman: Gonta is not good enough to be friends with you all

Antman: I can do basic stuff like tojo said...

Antman: maybe i do need help?

Antman: im not sure anymore:((((

Gremlin: THEY ARE ABLEIST GONTA,,, THEY FEEL SUPERIOR FOR TREATING UUUUU LIKE A CHILD

Detective pikachu: You sound really delusional Kokichi, maybe you should get sleep

Gremlin: S T F U, IM SPITTING ST8 FACTS BITCH

Detective pikachu: Sure you are. Now get some rest.

Gremlin: GRRRR WHY WONT YOU LISTEN TO ME YOU IDIOTS??

Bread roll: Cause your stupid and aggressive

Gremlin: your personality, basically?

Bread roll: shut up at least i have a boyfriend

Gremlin: Technically, you just stole my frienemy

Gremlin: Yall do be avoiding each other doe

Space Monkey: WE ARE NOT

Gremlin: Yeah yeah

Gremlin: yesterday i saw you to enter the same cafe by accident, duck your heads, then sit across the cafe from each other, all while avoiding eye contact

Gremlin: Soooo,,, things not going well in paradise?

Detective pikachu: you're nosy

Gremlin: says the literal detective

Space monkey: everythings fine your just a dickkkk

Gremlin: "oooo! Im momo-chan, i say bad word and go brrrrr"

Space monkey: im going to fucking stab him

Gremlin: You cant, ive already enslaved you with my chaotic, yet cute hijinks, havent i~

Space monkey: STOP STOP NO NOT THE SQUIGLY

Gremlin: is it the sex? WHY DONT YOU MAKE EYE CNOTACT WITH UR LADY NO MORE

Space monkey: ITS NOT THE SEX I HATE YOU

Gremlin: im free by the way at 8 ;)

Bread roll: STOP trying to steal my boyfriend kokichi, ive told you this before

Bread roll: NO

Bread roll: BODY

Antman: Gonta interrupts to say, Gonta loves you kokichi, and we should get flowers together, than maybe we can prank some people :D

Bread roll: Ive never wanted to stab you more, gonta

Gremlin: I'd enjoy that very much, fine fellow ;)

Gremlin: but idk,,,, can you like take care of me first, cuz IM SICK BECAUSE OF KAITO TUBERCULOSIS ASS

Space monkey: I DONT HAVE TB ANYMORE

Gremlin: SURE YOU DONT

Space monkey: I DONT

Gremlin: BUT GUESS WHAT

Gremlin: YOU STILL SMOKE DUMBASS AND THATS NOT GOOD FOR U OR YOUR TUBERCULOSIS

Detective pikachu: He smokes?

Atua's bitch: he does, i walked in on him in the bathroom lmao

Atua's bitch: he was scared shitless and threw it out the window, needless to say atua does nt approve

Gremlin: DO YOU EVEN HAVE THE VACCINE????

Space monkey: Uh,,, i was taught vaccines were bad, so no i don't have the vaccine

Gremlin: I HATE OLD PEOPLE

Gremlin: ABOLISH OLD PEOPLEEEE

Gremlin: THEY SPREAD MISINFORMATION AND IT PHISCALLY HURTS ME TO SEEEEEE

Space monkey: your dramatic, it cant be that bad

Gremlin: say that when you catch it again

Gremlin: i swear you coughed on me like,,,, 5 weeks ago tho

Antman: OOOO! Fun fact: Tuberculosis can lay dormant from 3 months to a few years!

Space monkey: u guys are just trying to scare me

Bread roll: Just checked the chat after using the br and,,m YOUDONT HAVE YOU VACCINES???

Detective pikachu: Im sorry, but kaito, please,,,,, for the love of god get vaccines

Space monkey: alright alright, ill do it cuz you guys are all on my case and i don't like being the villain :(

Gremlin: Im so happy i have gonta with me rn, he is making me tea while yall rot in your distant ass relationship (THIS IS FOR YOU KAITO)

Space monkey: Im going to destroy your bloodline in about three seconds if you dont stfu right fucking now

Gremlin: Hhehe i have an inaprwopwiate joke uwu

emoboi: STOP PLEASE DEAR GOD

cum dumpster: wHAt Is iT YOU WHORE

Gremlin: i was gonna say wouldn't he need to like,,,, have sex with my family to weed out my bloodline or something??

cum dumpster: i-

cum dumpster: Why am i acting surprised, ive watched porn with more extravagant plots than this

cum dumpster: ie; are you guys FUCKING? RIGHT INFRONT OF MY SALAD??? is one i will cherish with my soul

emoboi: hehe why did she point out the salad

Space monkey: I hate u kokichi, i truly do

Gremlin: I bet if you got the chance u would kiss me space boy :P

Bread roll has left the chat

Space monkey: o god is she ddoing one of those bf loyalty tests or smthing???

Space monkey: now im nervous lmao

Gremlin: why you so nervous stupid~~~~

Gremlin: It not like ur cheating on her homie

Space monkey: It's just a placebo effect

Gremlin: My brain feels fried Momo-chan,, i don't understand big boy words right now

Space monkey: Basically, if you take a pill that doesn't do anything but you don't know that and believe it does, you will scientifically start to feel better

Gremlin: first and only time saying this, but thank you

Space monkey: HEHEHEB YOU SAID THANK YOU YOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOUYOU SAID THANK YOU

Gremlin: Kaito,,, imma need you to do me a favor and look up on your ceiling

Space monkey: i hate you, idk what it is, but i hte you

Gremlin: good <3

Space monkey: HE REPLACED ALL MY THE STARS ON MY CELING WITH FUCKIBG DICKSSS

Space monkey: THIS IS THE LST FUCKING STRAW IM GONNA LOSE IT

Space monkey: IF MY GRANDPARENTS SEE THIS BULLSHIT THEY ARE GOING TO KILL ME, SLAP ME, MAYBE BREAK MY NECK AND DESTROY MEE

Space monkey: Im GENUINLEY panicing HOW TF am i gona get this off my wal???? They are going to bbat me senselpess help me shUichi

Detective pikachu: o god, i can sense the sheer pain and scaredness in that tet,

Detective pikachu: are you for real gong to get hurt or are you pulling a kokichi?

Space monkey: FUCKING HELP ME IM NOT FUCKING JOKINGKABKCB HELP THEY ARE NOT HOME RN THEY ARE LIKEE,,,, 40 MINUTES AWAY PLEASEE

Gremlin: okay,,, maybe this wasn't the best prank.,,, i guess i'll help clean up cuz im not that much of a sociopath

Gremlin: tbh my parents can go shove it too lowkey terrible 0/10

Space monkey: AHHHH IM SO SCARED PLS PSL GET HERE FAST

be-boop: Of course, i will come, i will survey the outside of the house

Antman: Gonta is coming too! We will get this done in under 40 minutes!

Space monkey: OKAY

Gremlin: Lowkey, if i cough on you ignore it bitch your the one who made me like this

Space monkey: W HA TDONT COUGH ON ME IM NOT SICK ANYMORE

Gremlin: I will give you TB again just cuz your making me suffer

Space monkey: Suffer what??? putting dicks on my FUCKING WALL???

Gremlin: Guilt, idiot, im feeling guilty.

cum dumpster: oof thats new

emoboi: yeah i wasn't expecting it

Mr.gonstealyoman: Me neither. It is rather peculiar seeing it being texted by him because he is always feels not guilty of his bad actions.

be-boop: I do believe he means it, though...

emoboi: impossible.

cum dumpster: i agree, literally impossible.

Gremlin: I HAVE A FUCKIBG SOUL YOU CRazY CONSPIRACISTS

Antman: Quick question, shuichi can i stay with you again? It'll be dark when i get home and gonta can't do that so,,, please help

Detective pikachu: my parents are like blank slates, who eat slowly, watch tv slowly, and never look at me. Im sure they wouldn't mind :P

Antman: ALRIGHT! :D LETS GET MISSION: MR. MOMOTA ROOM REPAIR DONE!

Gremlin: ooo! I like the name! IM INNNN!

Detective pikachu: On it!

be-boop: Ready for look out!

Space monkey: I love you guys :)

AN: Im lowkey sorry i ended this chaotic mess with angst,,,, but like fr i love it i love angst,, i hate reading it but love writing it

#kokichiouma #oumota #Ougoku #chat fic #kaito momota #kiibo #miu iruma #gonta gokuhara #ryoma #angie #shuichi saihara #vr au #kirumi #maki harukawa #korekiyo #danganronpav3 #danganronpa #grossness

91 notes · View notes

deantransgressions2 · 4 years

Text

4x21 when the levee breaks

this is a long one. enjoy.

#1: sam asked dean repeatedly to be let out of the panic room so he can explain. dean said no. instead he chose to continue to keep sam locked up against his will.

time tag: 1:10

#2: “you lied to me over, and over again. i get it now” (dean to sam).

here he is acknowledging sam has a serious addiction. he doesn’t fucking care though! because instead of treating sam like an addict, he is treating him like a monster.

time tag: 1:36

#3: “strong? this is about as far away from strong as you can get. try weak. desperate. pathetic.”

.... he is an ADDICT. quick google search will tell you that you should never blame the addict, or insult them. dean has never been able to see things from other’s perspectives, and this is a perfect fucking example of that. calling your brother, who has a drug addiction, pathetic and weak....makes me sick.

time tag: 1:55

#4: “oh lilith is going to die. bobby and i will kill her, and not with you” (said to sam).

idiot. dean couldn’t even kill alastair. hell, the angels couldn’t even kill alastair. and lilith is known to be stronger. dean has lost his mind.

time tag: 2:07

#5: “congrats sammy. you just bought yourself a benchwarmer seat to the apocalypse”.

okay a couple things, 1. sam didn’t buy shit, dean is forcing him to sit this one out. and 2. dean wants to kill lilith? cool. glad we are all acknowledging that no one knows the consequences of that yet.

time tag: 2:15

#6: shuts the hatch again and leaves to just go back upstairs while sam is screaming for dean to let him out. he not only left sam to detox alone in a locked metal cage. but now he is also leaving the basement so he won’t have to hear his screams? obviously doesn’t care about sam’s wellbeing at. all. it’s so fucked up.

time tag: 2:32

#7: “no one knows how long it will take. hell, or if sam will even live through it” (bobby to dean). dean and bobby do nothing.

time tag: 5:19

#8: “so what? we sacrifice sam’s life, his soul, for the greater good?” (said to bobby, after bobby suggested letting sam help with the apocalypse)

.....bold of dean to act like he cares about sam’s life. his brother is dying downstairs, and dean chilling with bobby upstairs. cute.

time tag: 8:45

#9: sam is too ill to walk across the panic room to get a glass of water. maybe if his “loving” brother was in there with him, that wouldn’t of been a problem.

time tag: 9:47

#10: “you got ass-reamed in heaven, but it was not of import?” (said to cas)

time tag: 14:02

#11: “can he do it? kill lilith? stop the apocalypse?” (said to cas)

oh? dean also believes killing lilith will stop the apocalypse? good to know. won’t matter though, because he’s gonna pretend he didn’t come 5x01.

time tag: 14:20

#12: “we believe it’s you dean, not your brother.” (cas to dean, about killing lilith)

we all know cas was lying, angels knew dean couldn’t do shit about lilith. but the words cas uses are similar to the ones ruby says to sam. dean is being manipulated into thinking HE can kill lilith “the right way” and if sam tries to kill lilith, then he will become a “creature you would feel compelled to kill” (cas to dean). point is, if dean was fully prepared to have the angels use him to kill lilith, then shouldn’t he have understood sam sacrificing himself to kill lilith?

time tag: 14:35

#13: the way the light was hitting him made him look so ugly for a second. looked 85 at best. he deserved to look ugly. best part of the episode.

time tag: 15:40

#14: strapped sam down to the bed. now he has zero access to water, or a toilet. smart.

time tag: 19:23

#15: bobby: “if he doesn’t get what he needs soon, sam’s not gonna last much longer”

dean: ”no. i’m not giving him demon blood. i won’t do it.”

bobby: “and if he dies?”

dean: “then at least he died human!”

dean doesn’t give a flying fuck about sam as a person. he would rather let his brother die, ALONE, just so he dies “human”.....sam hasn’t been 100% human since novemeber 2nd 1983. and ever since dean found this out in 4x03, he has treated sam as less than. he can act like he cares for his brother all he wants, but it’s obvious he fucking doesn’t.

time tag: 20:50

#16: “i won’t let my brother turn into a monster” (said to bobby)

....what kind of “monster” kills demons for the greater good. what kind dean? you let me know.

time tag: 22:27

#17: both dean and bobby think ruby got sam out of the panic room. ok. dumb. but ok.

time tag: 28:07

#18: “i am on call, in my car, on my way to murder the bitch” (said to bobby, about ruby)

time tag: 28:44

#19: ruby: “i had no idea that dean would do that to you”

sam: “you and me both”

thats just....sad. to trust your brother so completely your entire life, and then for him to do that to you....its fucked.

time tag: 30:00

#20: “us finding sam? that’s got to be about getting him back, not pushing him away” (bobby to dean).

dean didn’t fucking listen to a word bobby said.

time tag: 35:52

#21: tried to murder ruby again. as far as dean knows, ruby is also trying to kill lilith for the right reasons just let everyone else. i get he’s mad about the demon blood, but that’s sam’s friend, it’s his call to make. if sam wants to continue his addiction thats HIS choice. the addiction affects dean in 0 ways. therefore, he gets no say in the matter whatsoever.

time tag: 36:32

#22: sam: “let’s just talk about this”

dean: “soon as she’s dead (ruby), we can talk all you want”

why is he giving conditions? just talk to your fucking brother.

time tag: 37:18

#23: “i just want you to be okay” (said to sam) oh? is that why you left him alone to die in an underground metal room?

time tag: 37:53

#24: “come with us, dean. we can do this together” (sam to dean)

let’s remember sam said this. because dean is gonna act like he didn’t

time tag: 38:11

#25: “demon bitch is a deal breaker”

why are there always conditions with dean? like everything always has to go his way. god forbid anyone objects.

time tag: 38:20

#26: sam: “i’m the only one that can do this dean” dean disagrees. he thinks he is.....he thinks that because the angels are manipulating him. two manipulated boys standing in a room f-i-g-h-t-i-n-g.

time tag: 38:38

#27: dean: “you’re not gonna do a single damn thing”

sam: “stop bossing me around, dean!”

time tag: 38:59

#28: sam: “my whole life, you take the wheel, you call the shots, and i trust you, because you are my brother. now, i’m asking you, for once...trust me”

dean: “no.”

so sam trusts his brother, solely because he’s his brother, yet dean won’t trust sam because???? idk he’s too tall maybe.

time tag: 39:11

#29: “it’s not something that you’re doing, it’s what you are!” (said to sam).

proof that dean only cares if sam is human, and not who sam actually is as a person. he started treating sam differently the day he found out what azazel did to him, and he has treated him with the same apprehension and disdain ever since.

time tag: 39:35

#30: “it means you’re a monster” (said to sam).

time tag: 39:58

#31: sam punched dean. dean fights back. based on EVERYTHING dean has done to him, i’m gonna go ahead and say that sam punching him is completely justified. now dean deciding to beat the shit out of him....not justified. sam did nothing to deserve that. he literally just made a friend without dean’s permission, and got high. none of which, affected dean.

time tag: 40:05

#32: “you walk out that door...don’t you ever come back” (said to sam)

same words john used. cute dean. like father like son

time tag: 41:46

43 notes · View notes

xhanisai · 4 years

Text

SALTING AROUND AT THE SPEED OF SOUND

AO3 / FFN

Summary: Introducing!!!!

The! Ultimate! Salt! Fic! Ever! IN ZA WARUDO!

Featuring Dumb Noir getting taught a lesson about boundaries, Perfectnette getting friends and love interest(s), and LILA GETTING HER ASS HANDED BACK! HOW COULD YOU RESIST SUCH A WONDERFUL FIC?

(All in all, a crack fic on salt fics to bring our spirits up~)

Disclaimer - I've actually only read like one sentence of a salt fic and fucked off afterwards so everything I'm basing off in this fic is purely from exaggerated rumours and gossip about the salt corner THEREFORE if anything here looks familiar or if it seems like I'm taking the piss out of a specific story, it's all just one big coincidence. >:D ~(x)~ . . . Of all locations to settle on for the beginning of this amazing, wonderful, fucking fantastic story, it's established on the Eiffel Tower. Cliched but wonderfully ironic for the phenomenal heroes of Paris. On the beams, higher than the naked eye could see, Ladybug and Chat Noir were... Arguing. The feline hero had his partner's wrist clasped in an iron hold, digging those deadly claws ever so slightly into the soft flesh, piercing the supposed indestructible suit with a creepy grin- "Wait- hold up a second. I would never, NEVER hurt My Lady! Not even unintentionally! And what's with that face I'm making!?" Oh SHUT UP Shit Noir! Let me carry on writing my fucking story jeez! Stop breaking out of character and keep following the script! Anyways~ The skinny, pasty assed hero- "This script sucks..."- -TUGGED Ladybug closer to him, grin widening like he won the lottery as his demonic looking eyes perversely drank in the sight of the clearly uncomfortable looking heroine in his grasps. His face leaned into hers, only coming closer as she tried her best to lean back with a grimace. "Just one kiss Bugaboo~ one kiss won't hurt..." His grip tightened on the appendage, making the girl wince painfully. "Come on Chat Noir...let go! I have already told you, I'm in love with someone else. You seriously need to back off!" Ladybug whimpered, tossing away all her badassery and ability to suckerpunch a fuckboy in the face because hell yeah it ain't relevant to this sexy fic- "You're right Chaton, this script does suck lmao"- IGNORING WHAT THE CANON LB JUST SAID. Ehem. Like a defenseless little shoujou manga protagonist, Ladybug felt tears sparkle in her eyes and pure sadness washed over her frail body before Fuck Noir dipped her into a romantic pose and smashed his lips against hers with soooooo much passion and tongue and teeth and- . What. On. Earth. Oi you stupid cat! Watch where you're putting your hands on the girl! Yikes! What do they teach these Europeans!? Break it up already you hormone riddled boobs! "Oh Minou~ You're so daring~" "Just for you, My Lady~" STAY ON SCRIPT YOU BRATS! Hmph! Carrying on. Suddenly, herculean strength riddled through Ladybug's blood, falcon punching Bitch Noir off her and off the tower, thus HenchBug™ was born. Panting and wiping her lip with her thumb in a really really badass way (YOU KNOW THAT EPIC WAY THAT ANIME CHARACTERS DO TO WIPE THE BLOOD OFF THEIR LIP, RIGHT? RIGHT? ex deeeee), MachoBug swept towards Pussy Noir's broken twiggy body at the bottom of the tower. "You disobeyed me for the umpteenth time, Noir." BadassBug uttered cooly, keeping a blind eye to the growing crowd around her and the mangled up flesh on sticks at her feet. The black and yellow mess didn't respond. "Lo-oooool cos I'm dead!" WE'LL PRETEND WE DIDN'T HEAR THAT EITHER. Anger coursed through Ladybug's veins as all those traumatising memories and moments she had with her horrific partner flashed through her brain like an old window's movie maker AMV with Evanescence's 'Bring Me Back To Life' song blasting at full volume. The conveniently arrived Alya at the front of the crowd live streamed everything on the WadyBwog, babbling about ice cream scoops. "Every time we met up, you'd always make unwanted advances to me. You'd always force a kiss on me. You even slapped my thicc™ ass a few times- once to the beat of fucking Nyan cat!" The hive minded crowd surrounding them 'oooed' and 'aaahed', some snapped a selfie with what's left of the black cat. "Therefore," The sun auspiciously shone behind MariBug, giving her an ethereal, angelic look as she carried on her lecture. "I now deem you unworthy of the miraculous." BugBug fluttered her eyelashes with so much pain as if reciting those words killed her whole generation and their dogs and their hamsters. "Hand it over to me or else I'll force it off you." All of a sudden BuffBug™ was back, bitch slapping CryBabyBug away and menacingly placed one foot on the carcass. "Wow I think she forgot that you're dead Chat Noir," THE HIGH TENSIONED MOMENT REMAINED UNBROKEN AS FAKEBUG- oof- Ladybug rolled her eyes with annoyance at the disgusting boy's silence and immediately knelt down to yank the miraculous off his bony fingers- "Never!" The catboy sprung back to life before anyone could breathe, clutching his hand to guard his ring ferally, froth seeping out of his teeth and fangs gnashing against one another- "Looks like I'm a vampire with rabies now, Bug." "Since when did you have fangs?" "Since two seconds ago-" OH MY GOD YOU TWO! SHUT UP AND LET ME WRITE! Zombie Noir leapt back with a hiss, faux ears and tail twitching with indignation and summoned the ancient destruction power whilst BossBug spun her yoyo around in battle formation, ready to call for her lucky charm anytime soon. Cat and Bug kept up the intense eye contact as that cowboy music from the good, the bad and the fugly played in the background (cheers Lahiffe mah d00d!). "You don't want to become my enemy, do you, Chat N00b?" The heroine spat, bones clicking in place as she stretched her fingers when she and the lad in black circled each other slowly. The crowd and Alya were casually chilling in the background, the latter still narrating about an epic ice cream scoop. "Heh, I won't need to be the enemy if you don't touch MY ring... Milady~"- "MON DIEU! C'EST 'MY LADY'! C'EST N'AI PAS 'MILADY'!" THAT'S THE POINT YOU STUPID CAT! Break out of character one more time and I'll castrate you and feed your teeny tiny *censored* to the dogs! "...My Lady? Is my *censored* small? :(" "If your *censored* was small, you'd never have been able to make me scream at night, Minou~ ;3" ":D"

Regardless! The pussycat feinted to the left before dodging the razor sharp wire of his Lady's (not) yoyo, whipping out his baton (not the tiny one either) and swiftly used it to vault himself away like the coward he CLEARLY is. "You'll never get me alive, THOT!" Was the last thing that small dick energy minded cuck yowled and fled with his tail between his legs. BigBug let out a yell of rage™ and slammed her fist on the ground, branding the sloppy concrete job with a crater as the shockwaves caused the audience to let out a little 'DAYUMMMMMMMM'. "Lol I thought the geezer was dead hahaah! Yo Ladybuggy, mah homie, you and kitty cat did the shame shame already or nah?" Alya, the lil hoe, leant into the heroine's personal space with a crazed grin. She only received a middle finger from the annoyed Asian. (MMmm Mmmm yEAH YEAh trANSiTION so SEXYYYY) Now, it is conveniently time for Marinette's afternoon classes. The exhausted girl dragged her feet up those weird ass spirally steps that could break ankles JUST by looking at them and made it to her classroom, only to pause at the shouting she was hearing behind the door. "Oh boy, time to unleash the kraken..." Silence Adrien! You're not supposed to have appeared yet! Dumb ass blondes these days smh... "HEY! >:0" With a deep breath, the raven haired girl pushed the door open only to be met with what could be best described as a clusterfuck. Tears welled up in her eyes as the remains of her sketchbook (which looked like it had a trip in a paper shredder) was dumped all over the floor. She snapped her head back up only for her heart to literally shatter when she was met with a furious Alya Motherfuckin' Césaire. "Marinetti DupainGhetti. This. Is. Your. Punishment." Alya's glasses flashed sinisterly as her lips curled up into d i s g u s t . The rest of the class mirrored a similar look, acting as if poor little Cheng vored everything they loved and cherished. All except two people. That witch BITCH Lie-la smirked secretly as she cowered behind Alya and the wimp, spineless little shitty Dumbdrien whimpered on his desk, pretending that nothing was happening. "P-P-Punishment for wh-what?" Babynette sobbed, clutching her shoulders as if to hug herself and make her look smaller than she is. She darted her eyes towards the model, begging him internally to say something, anything! Alas, Bitchdrien only looked away guiltily, his thin chapped lips sealed shut. Marinette couldn't believe her bad luck. First there was an akuma attack, then she was assaulted by her shitty partner for the millionth time and now this? "Punishment for bullying our lord and saviour, Lila of course! How dare you make such a sweet girl like her suffer!?" Alya roared, using the power of the seven chaos emeralds and twenty dragonballs to go super satan and pinned Sweetienette against the wall with an elbow. Her hair fizzed with animosity and her eyes gleamed in a demonic red colour- "Dieu...you just had to drag my best friend into this too, huh?" "You'd think this writer is sane enough to know that I'd cataclysm anyone that dared to harm Ma Princesse, non?" "The writer? Sane? Good joke."- IGNORING STUPIDNETTE AND BLOODYDRIEN- Alya snarled, bruising our sweet little angel's poor skin with her brute strength whilst the rest of the class watched without a question. The sausage haired wench munched on some greasy ass popcorn as she watched the show whilst Shamedrien became one with the floor, a perfect doormat for us queens to stomp on. "You tripped her all the time when no one was watching, aggravating her shattered kneecaps. You plagerised her designs, ruining what's left of her sensitive self esteem and dammit don't even get me started on all those rumours you attempted to spread about her, smearing her celebrity status! I've never hated anyone more than you, BITCHINETTE!" Alya harrumphed and then shoved Brokenette against the wall again, possibly snapping her spine and stormed back to her new bestie. "Mon Dieu your best friend just murdered you..." "Mon Dieu my best friend just murdered me..." Tosses a knife at the duo to make them shut the fuck up. Everyone else applauded the psycho journalist for putting Poornette in her place, even Stinkdrien cos he can't handle peer pressure- BAM! . . . "HOW DARE YOU HURT MARINETTE DUPAIN CHENG!" A tall, stern looking boy slammed the door open, scooping Deadinette in his arms and blew out steam through his nostrils like a bull. Everyone le gasped as the girl suddenly turned into Alivenette and embraced the stranger like he's her long lost lover (Aiyeeeeeeeeeeee mUH O-T-FUCKING-P! K Y A A A! EVEN THOUGH WE KNOW JACKSHIT ABOUT HIM). "BELIX BRAGRESTE! You saved me~ Don't hurt my homiesexuals please- they're all brainwashed by the sausage haired girl..." The blackberry haired angel begged, tugging on Belix's sleeves. "I didn't do anything-" Uglydrien was quick to defend himself only to melt back down into a doormat by Belix's dark glare, ripping out what spinal tissue the model had left. "Damn straight you didn't do SHIT." Bragreste swiftly delivered a power-kick against Assgreste, yeeting him to the moon and then turned towards the rest of the f00king class, rolling his sleeves up. "As for you nerds...I'm gonna chop you all up into mincemeat and EAT you all with my spaghetti!-" "I'm here Marinette!!!" Another lad swooped in through the door, hips swaying to the beat as 'Luka Luka Night Fever' plays in the background and then posed! Why it's none other than the obviously best written, best character, best BOY in the world: RUKA COFFEE- sorry, I mean Luka Couffaine! He strummed his guitar a few times, nodding and humming as if he was conversing with the beautiful instrument whilst bokeh dots and pink sparkly glitter floated around him. "Ah~ my guitar said that everyone's being a bitch ass motherfucker to our beautiful designer! Come with my Mari~ Take my hand and I'll take you away from this school!" The lycee student didn't wait for her answer and grabbed the star struck girl oh SO romantically~ "No! She should move schools with me!" Belix Bananagreste snatched Nettie back possessively, just like a cat. It was then that the girl decided that when she managed to snatch the black cat miraculous back from the loser that currently wielded it, she was going to give it to Belix- "Ugh don't fuck with me..." "Shhh. You're supposed to have been yeeted to the moon, Chaton," "Marinette please just throttle the writer already-" AND THEN! SUDDENLY! Erm... Errr... AHA! Suddenly all these people from some furry superhero universe came flooding in through the door, yelling insults and real truths about LIE-LA and protecting my best girl Maribear like a boss! Heroes like Gamien and Dason Bob and that guy and err, the other guy and yeah AND THEN they all began to BEAT UP that BITCH LILA and then- "Oh no she's losing it, Adrien I don't think this will last any longer..." "No kidding!" THEN JAGGED STONE CAME FLYING THROUGH THE WINDOW, JAMMING OUT HIS LATEST SONG ABOUT HOW LILA IS SUCH A LIAR AND EXPOSED EVERY SINGLE THING SHE DID TO BEST GIRL MACHONETTE! THEN ALL THESE OTHER KIDS FROM THE SCRAPPED PV UNIVERSE CAME IN VIA A CONGO LINE AND MARINETTA DECIDED TO GIVE THEM THE OTHER MIRACULOUS COS WHY NOT!? AND THEN CHLOE BECAME MARINETTE'S NEW BFF COS HELL YEAH I LOVE VIBING WITH PEOPLE WHO BULLIED ME AND MY PEERS FOR FOUR YEARS STRAIGHT AHAHAAHAH QUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENS- "Adrien, I'm going to kill her. She needs to stop." "Go on then~" AND THEN! AND FUCKING THEN! SCEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!!!!!! . . . [Error 404: The following writer has unfortunately met her demise through unknown means. We apologise for any inconveniences. Please keep scrolling as we clear up the mess. Have a good day.] . . . "Huh...that was anticlimactic...now what?" "You go off snogging my rejected predecessor and the guitar boy? >:(" "As if I'd go for anyone other than my silly kitty!" ":D" . . . ~(x)~ A/N: I am never EVER writing anything this cursed AGAIN! How can you bash anyone but the villains in this series!? Damn! I can't even say I'm sleep deprived! This is the most fucked up shit I've written and I'm super alert oof!

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redxblueihateloveyou · 3 years

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This is a personal opinion but from where I see it the Given movie and the anime itself definitely was... something that I would question because somethings just.. didn't make sense to me. The development of the Characters were either super fast or super slow and it made the pacing really really weird for me idk. But I do think that a huge reason so many people love the Given movie is because of the fact that when you compare Given to OTHER JP BL animes, there's very very slight improvement in terms of the story itself of Given. Is the story poorly executed? Fucking hell, who the hell is going to say no here. But is it better then some of the JP BLs out there? That's depended on how you view BL to be. For a lot of people things like Super Lovers or Hitorijime My Hero are super unbearable to watch because it's "problematic" (which honestly okay, you do you BB) which then leads them to look for BL animes that DON'T have such "themes." Leading them to actually liking things poorly executed but just "not problematic", Given for example.

Given is “not problematic”? Debatable.

Their first kiss was right after Mafuyu finally had a courage to sing a song about his ex who commited a suicide. ???

Problematic doesn’t only mean stuff like “he’s underage”. What about using someone to get over your grief or getting into a relationship with someone who is still not over his ex death and is vulnerable at the moment? Is this suddenly “not problematic” bc they’re same age and he haven’t pushed him into a wall in throws of passion?

To me it’s not even about the fact if it’s problematic or not (it’s rarely not tho, no matter what ppl think), it’s about whether its believable and feels genuine or not. It depends on many factors: situation, characters past, traumas, etc, etc. It depends on the story and how you write it.

Change some stuff and it’s gonna be a completely different thing. Make it like Uenoyama only hugged Mafuyu after the song, even tho he wanted to kiss him, but knows that it’s not the right moment. Make Mafuyu heal first, make Uenoyama be in his own angst that he loves Mafuyu so much for example, but cares about him recover more, so he doesn’t expect for it to go somewhere, then he tries to date someone and Mafuyu first starts getting out there, when he feels like he can start trying again. Someday he gets sick and Uenoyama cancels his date to take care of him even tho it’s nothing serious and then the realization comes. Make Mafuyu kiss him first and take the first step. This would’ve changed everything so much. He should’ve made the first step when he was ready, this would’ve felt so right. Uenoyama kissing him after that song is just.. it feels, I was like ehhhmmm.. weird?

Seeing someone saying that Given is a masterpiece is hilarious to me. The fact that it includes heavy themes like suicide, doesn’t make it a masterpiece, esp when it’s handled this badly. Once again, if you pick such thing as a base for a love story, do it right then, not in a “bibbidi bobbidi boo” kind of thing.

BL or not BL, any relationships, it depends on whether you watch it and it feels plausable or not.

For example, if Yuu says that he can’t live with Mika, my tongue won’t even twist to call it “unhealthy” or be like “dude why”. But if some high schooler in slice of life anime who has a caring family tried to end himself bc his two weeks friend left him, I would’ve yelled “bitch go see a doctor”.

Depending on the story you can sell some feelings or not.

Nezumi and Shion are also problematic according to ppl’s logic these days. But I 100% believe they’re each other’s true loves. Only 11 episodes and it’s sold.

In Given I didn’t believe it. Bc it’s ridiculous, ok? It wasn’t the right place or time to start this relationship. It is not a new love story, it’s just a sad story.

Given movie is slightly better compared to other japanese BL? Why would you offend Sekaiichi Hatsukoi, Uragiri wa boku no namae, No.6 and many others?

Also better where? They kept the same old “’stop, i don’t want to’, but he did it anyway” stuff AND on top of that the story sucks.

The way he used him knowing very well that he was unrequitedly in love with him for so long is so disgusting that it leaves a much grosser feeling than many yaois combined. You’re saying “it’s slightly better” bc they’re of age or don’t have an age difference? I don’t get it. It somehow makes everything better?

No, thanks. I’d rather watch Onodera sleep with Takano in high school with them being genuinely into each other and it going great than whatever happened in the Given movie. I don’t care if they’re both 18 there, it made me feel bad.

I didn’t feel bad, when Wei Wuxian thought “why the fuck didn't I have sex with Lan Zhan back when I was 15? I've really pissed away all my days, haven't I?”. I wonder why is that.

Like what you’re saying here is that their opinion on BL is so low that they automatically would give it 10 out of 10 bc it’s slightly better than smth that they find “unbearable” to watch? What kind of evaluation is that exactly? Maybe also let’s compare each anime to “boku no pico”, then everything will look like a masterpiece.

Like excuse me for the fact that when I watch some shonen-ai and yaoi, I judge it the same way I judge any other genre and any other relationships (hetero or gay) in animes. On a scale whether I care or don’t care, whether I believe that they love each other or don’t, whether it’s a good story or not. I don’t get what it means “it’s good for yaoi”. It’s just not good. This movie is trash, I mean, the relationship in it is trash. Who the fuck cares gay or not gay. Trash relationships are trash. Bad story is a bad story. Whether it’s a bad gay story or a bad hetero story, I don’t give a shit.

The reason I’m more into boy on boy ships is because I love the relationships there more than relationships in most heterosexual couples. My fav hetero ships are either “from hate/attraction to love” stories like “gone with the wind”, “anastasia” or “pride and prejudice” or stuff like “equals without pink goo, who only see each other and don’t need no one else and would die for each other, epic soulmates” like Richard and Kahlan. In anime 99% of those fit bromances, not romances. Like I don’t find Midoriya/Uraraka appealing at all for a reason that “she said ‘hi’, he blushed as a tomato, now they’re supposed to be each other’s romantic interests” is not what I find romantic. I find romantic the fact that Todoroki is forever devoted to Midoriya bc he knows he’s amazing and is not afraid to say it; and he’ll always be there for him when he needs him, no matter what it is, him just sitting there crying, some villain trying to kill him or if he’s too late out ther grossery shopping. Uraraka most of the times doesn’t even care where he is.

Most hetero romantic animes, I just find ridiculous, too cheesy and unrealistic and I’m not ready to watch 50 episodes for them to hold hands. I’m not in that age and I also never found things like this romantic before either. Stuff like Kisa/Yukine, when you meet someone, find him attractive, wanna fuck him, then fall in love accidentally.. yeah, that’s understandable to me. Stuff like Takano/Onodera “I was an naive idiot in high school, but now life made me a sassy bitch and I can’t open up to people as easily” also yes, relatable.

When you’re turning into a tomato bc someone said “penis” and think holding hands will take your virginity or smth, that’s not my thing.

So when I watch BL, I expect more, not less. So if it’s bad, I just say it’s bad, I’m not gonna be like “hmm... unproblematic... then 10/10″ like what?

1stly, even “little mermaid” and “cinderella” are problematic.

2ndly everyone is so focused on purity these days, like storyline don’t matter at all. It’s like any great love story is automatically trash if they have age difference. Any trash love story is great, if they don’t?

Let’s then also rate “Dororo” as 1, bc it’s like 24 episodes of them falling for each other while she’s 11 and he’s 16. Wow, such gross relationships they have during the whole story. Doesn’t matter that she grew up at the end of the last episode, the whole anime she’s a child. And let’s rate Noragami 0, bc 2000 years old perverted Yato is into 15 year olds.

No one has to fuck asap (heck even in the same hella problematic “Super Lovers” you talk about, Haru refused to fuck Ren even tho he was 17 in s2 and wanted to fuck another guy) and the rule “you can only fall in love after 18″ doesn’t exist. Also underage is not BL thing, it’s all anime thing. It’s time to shut it already. There are zillions of age gap couples out there who are great. Hyakkimaru waited for Dororo to grow up, it’s fine, seriously, they love each other in the right way, he didn’t want to fuck her when she was 11, okay? They did love each other tho already then. Pls excuse them for that.

3rdly, some relationship that ppl here call unproblematic are 20 times more problematic, than what they call problematic.

4tly, why the heck it’s like couples who have an amazing character and relationship progression, who love each other to death and will do anything for each other, ppl go: “wow, at the very beginning, he grabbed his wrist, he needs to go to jail”. Meanwhile a relationship who has no base, no story, no logical progression, no anything are “yes, best love story in the world”. Yeah... who cares if it feels like it’s all been pulled out of an ass and doesn’t make sense, very healthy tho.

It sounds lately like if most ppl here had two stories in front of them and one would be about two men who just met and the next day one proposed and they lived happily ever after and 2nd would be some complicated incredible story with a natural progression of the relationship, but they yelled at each other once, they’d be like “1st is better”. Well, not to me, no.

#answered #anonymous #anime

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