#she’s like. she’s interesting lol. i don’t know her age and i assumed like late 30s but her mom is 87????

[thesharktanksdriver]

Hey! So I wanted to ask something about determination! reader, have the characters of the movies meet Reader? Like for example Uta or Tesoro of film gold?

Anyways I lover You work and I hope to see the part of Roger! ✨

Hello!!! Sorry for getting to your ask so late, I’ve been really tired these past few days lol.

But as for your questions kinda?

I have to retcon y/n meeting Uta as a baby cause it doesn’t match up timeline wise. I assumed Shanks found her just before Roger died but I’m pretty sure I’m wrong about that lol.

But I do want to write a lil something for Uta, she’s a personal favourite of mine and she in my opinion doesn’t get enough attention.

I’d like to make something about y/n meeting her and somehow convincing her of how the wake-shroom is dangerous, maybe by eating it and dying lol. I might even make something later on with the straw hats meeting up with her in Elegia for a reunion for her and Luffy….plus a duet between her, Brook and y/n would be killer. I just want good things for her 😭

As for Tesoro if think something interesting could be that they both met while slaves, but I’m unsure if that timeline wise since y/n was a slave when boa and her sisters were for an undetermined amount of time until Boa was forced to kill them.

Really sad idea for that though is that in that time Tesoro tried his best to help and protect them before they were killed. Maybe they had even met because he could hear them quietly singing to try and comfort Boa and her sisters and it reminded him of Stella :[

That idea is really funny tho when it comes to one piece gold cause he has a panic attack realizing their

A) alive after he assumed they died cause he saw the girls they were with uncontrollably sobbing, now he thinks they had somehow escaped

B) with the straw hats he’s actively trying to kill

C) damn, he needs their skincare routine cause they look like they haven’t aged at all!

Even if this route isn’t the case, i cousl kinda see him doing his whole thing In gold of trying to capture and kill the straw hats but then sees they have this random kid with them that reminds a little too much of Stella and assumes the straw hats kidnapped them and is holding them as some sort of hostage.

Which in turns makes him even more pissed and determined (lol) to kill these damn pirates and save this kid.

If this was the case of scenario of their meeting, y/n opening up about their own time as well as a slave would be really interesting. Especially since in many regards he became like the world novels he hated, taking pleasure in others suffering as well as having insane amounts of wealth to live in luxury while also being hypocritical and hating other wealthy people who act exactly like him.

Tesoro wouldn’t get why y/n looks at him with a sad and also horrified look in their eyes.

Why they seem afraid of him when he had “saved” them.

Another potential movie character I can see as an interesting person for y/n to meet is Z.

Because for a much as Z hates pirates I don’t think he’d be willing to hurt a kid, not when his was killed. So he’s left in a weird impasse of wanting to kill the straw hats but also trying to keep y/n not involved even if he knows they’re also a pirate and their actively joining in on the fights.

Doesn’t help that the marines there to stop him reaallly want y/n too, so he kinda has to deal with Borsalino and making sure that the admiral nor y/n’s crew doesn’t get them.

I’d definitely imagine y/n would get in heated arguments with the dude, especially since they’re not letting someone mess with Roger’s legacy and cause they get his pain (somewhat at least).

They’ve been on the receiving end of cruelty from pirates.

But at the same time marines have done arguably much worse yet uphold the status of justice.

What is justice when they murder all infants on an island due to fear of Roger having a blood child.

What is justice when they wipe out an entire race of people and take their land to make Mary geoise.

What is justice when they make living weapons.

What is justice when marines can kill civilians with only so much as a small punishment by HQ.

What justice is there in tracking down escaped slaves and being lapdogs for celestial dragons.

At least pirates though some are equally terrible don’t proclaim themselves under the hypocrisy of “justice”. Don’t claim to be holy saints when they try and kill someone for the sin of their father being a pirate.

[longing-for-rain]

I was reading one of your fanfiction and you’ve written in disgusting detail about zuko getting r@ped, why?

Interesting question. I wonder about it myself sometimes.

But what the hell, let me psychoanalyze myself tonight because it’s been a really bad time lately and it’s Friday night so you know what that means 🥴🥃

Anyways.

Weirdly enough I’ve been drawn to that kind of content from a young age, like age 12 young, pretty much right after I’d gone on the internet and been exposed to shit. It was always confusing for me. I always had this weird compulsion to watch certain male characters get hurt very badly in ways women typically get hurt. I’m not just talking about rape either; that’s probably the most extreme part of it, but it was also things like “damsel in distress” situations, eating disorders, body image issues, etc. I’m not saying men never experience these things, just that especially in media, they’re almost always associated with women.

I felt really weird for it because let’s be honest it is pretty fucked up. How did I get like this? It’s not even like I found it hot or anything—I’m a lesbian, I don’t feel attraction towards men at all. Besides, it was only violence I was drawn to. The minute a story started getting to some kind of Stockholm Syndrome situation where the victim starting falling in love with his abuser, it became a squick and I had to run away. It also couldn’t be just any male character. It had to be one I really liked. There have been others but you’re right, it started with Zuko and over the years it’s mostly Zuko. And yeah, that’s why I ended up writing content like that myself, because it was on my mind and I use writing to vent. But why? What was I subconsciously trying to vent about in that specific case?

Lately though I think I figured it out. The best way I can think of to describe it is a revenge fantasy. Which I know is deeply fucked up but hear me out.

So I get on the internet at age 12, right? At the time, my favorite shows were ATLA and HTTYD. So as one does, I start looking for things about my shows and come across art of the blorbos and naturally discover the world of fanfiction. And how wonderful for 12 year old me! I latched onto Zutara almost instantly because even as a kid my favorite scene in the show was the Final Agni Kai and I really wanted to see them get together. Now I find out there is a whole world of stories I can read online about that exact thing happening in so many different ways? It was beautiful.

But as you know if you know anything about fanfic sites (which I assume you do because you found my fucked up stories lol) I found some unpleasant things. Keep in mind this was around 2012 and I was browsing ff.net which had nowhere near the tagging/warning system that AO3 does. And even if it did it probably wouldn’t have mattered because I was 12 years old with a dangerous combination of naïveté and curiosity.

So anyway! What do I find on ff.net when I went scrolling for my lovely Zutara fics? Well, I did find some really cute ones. There are some I still think about but can’t find for the life of me because they’re either deleted or buried in the depths of ff.net. That was all good. You know what wasn’t good? The…other things. And oh boy. The people complaining about how Zutara is some kind of colonizer abuse fantasy wouldn’t have lasted 10 seconds back then. I remember reading a fic where Zuko raped Katara while she was tied to a tree. No warnings, and in the end note the author said it wasn’t rape because she ended up liking it. Many, many fics revolving around the idea of Zuko kidnapping Katara and making her into some kind of sex slave but it’s okay! She likes it and he turns good on the end for her so it’s true love! I also vividly remember a Blue Spirit x Katara fic where they were fucking, he took off the mask revealing himself as Zuko, Katara got scared and tried to push him off, Zuko just held her down and kept going. Not called rape. No warnings. Comments full of people talking about how “hot” it was.

Get the picture? It was horrifying. Keep in mind I was 12. It made me deeply angry, not just because of the misogyny and glorification of sexual violence, but also because it was Zuko doing it. I loved this character. I loved him because his story was so compelling, he was good and kind, he seemed safe to me. And reading about him violently abuse and rape the person he was supposed to love most was horrifying. It felt like some kind of betrayal. It made me hate him.

Middle school era me stopped reading Zutara fic as a result. I kept getting burned by it, and felt drawn towards that kind of Zuko rapefic instead. An old Zhaoko fic still sticks out in my mind. It was a pretty simple plot where Zhao kidnapped Zuko, whipped him and raped him, then at the end Katara rescued and healed him. It was oddly cathartic for me. Because it a) satisfied my revenge itch to see Zuko hurt in the same way I read about him hurting Katara in those other fics and b) put Zuko in a vulnerable position that would render him incapable of being a perpetrator in that universe (I know that’s not how it works in reality but that’s just my gut reaction there idk). Also read tons of fucked up Boiling Rock fics because it’s kind of a no brainer in the Zuko rapefic genre.

I don’t remember exactly why, but in the mid 2010s I didn’t really read much fic at all and my interest sort of fizzled out. I was mostly into HTTYD at that point and had a brief fling with Voltron before the fandom went to shit (which didn’t take long). So I guess that dark side of mine went dormant for a while and I didn’t think about it a lot.

Then oh boy…COVID hit. I was 19 when it started and found myself drawn into unhealthy levels of internet usage like most people during that time because what else were we supposed to do for fun. I was also going through some really fucked up heavy personal shit which led me to turning back to my old comfort ship…Zutara. Found my way onto tumblr, then to the fanfic sites. AO3 was a welcome surprise after being used to ff.net. Also for the first time I discovered the “community” aspect of fandom which I really enjoyed and helped me fight some of that COVID-induced isolation. It was really nice at first. I even began writing my own fics for the first time. And as you can see from my AO3 profile, they were very simple and cutesy in the beginning. Back before I went insane lmao.

But that happiness was short lived, because I kind of had a repeat of what happened when I was 12, only worse. Same pattern of reading some really good Zutara fics and some really bad ones. Zuko is sexually violent towards Katara. Zuko kidnaps Katara. Zuko rapes Katara. The author has some kind of technicality that makes it “not really rape/abuse” when that was clearly the intention. But this time, I was in a “community” with “friends” who promised me I mattered to them and that they cared about me. So I mentioned something about how disturbed I was to see things like this, naïvely thinking they’d understand where I was coming from.

And they…told me I was a bigot.

Yeah so. This was after I’d been sexually assaulted the first time. I also had this older creepy beta reader who I later realized had been sexually grooming me but that’s another story. Anyways! Point is I was in a bad state of mind, especially surrounding the topic of sexual violence, so it really hit me hard to have it used against me like that, made to feel crazy for having a problem with it, and dogpiled on for trying to explain myself and speak out.

Needless to say, I ended up feeling isolated, hurt, and confused by this. Much like I was back at age 12, so I relapsed into bad habits.

Honestly I’d been doing it before the breaking point, just more subtly. If you’ve creeped my AO3, you’ll see various flavors of “femdom” shit there. I like to call that my “I was being groomed lol” era. I had someone basically trying to convince me that male domination was “empowering” and that it was a sign of “maturity” for me to embrace it. Basically trying to convince me most/all women secretly desired it, resisting was a sign she wanted it deep down, I’d come around eventually, etc. Honestly I think this person just liked my writing and wanted me to pump out free fetish content for her, but it kind of backfired since it made me uncomfortable and I ended up just wanting to write femdom and Zuko rapefics because in that situation, it was the only outlet I had to express my hurt and discomfort at being bombarded with that disturbing kind of fic where Zuko is a rapist. I was subconsciously trying to reverse the narrative to escape the misogyny and the trauma I was suffering as a result.

Then after I got out of the grooming situation it just went off the rails from there. Stuff in my personal life was also getting worse so I just had this mass of stress and anger constantly running through my mind. It also really fucked with my sense of identity since the groomer/community I was in sort of left me with the impression that a woman’s role in society is to be objectified and abused and humiliated, and that she’s supposed to embrace it. I don’t think they necessarily intended it that way, but it left me with that impression because I saw so much content like that and barely anything representing women the way I wished to be perceived as a woman. It even made me feel alienated from other woman to the point I didn’t want to be a woman anymore (which is a feeling I’ve grappled with since puberty basically but that’s another story).

I don’t know which fic of mine you’re specifically referring to in which Zuko is raped in graphic detail, but I’m assuming it’s Dark Reflections because that’s probably the most graphic thing I’ve written. That’s the fic I started writing in the middle of that whole mess. It was very cathartic. I went with a female perpetrator against Zuko because it allowed me to fuck with the gender dynamics. A key plot point in that fic is also that Jun’s motivation partly stems from the fact that she mistakenly believes Zuko raped Katara so the idea of taking revenge against Zuko for being a rapist felt more direct. And of course, the reason why it’s so detailed and graphic and contains a lot of typical violent kink shit is because that was all the same shit I’d had thrown at me in the context of Zuko abusing Katara, so I just wanted to give it back to him if that makes sense. It brought me a morbid sense of comfort to see him be abused in the same way. I just have a catharsis generally about men suffering what they make women suffer. I know it’s fucked up, but it was a fucked up part of my life. And for the record I’m not trying to justify it or say it’s okay, I’m kinda of neutral on that tbh. Just acknowledging where my mind was and the fact that it’s a thing that I did.

For what it’s worth now, as I took the time to focus more on healing, I’ve felt less drawn to pure violence. I find myself wanting to write more about the thematic aspects of it and explore it that way. Even with Dark Reflections itself, the fic is incomplete and much longer than I originally intended it to be because I actually do want to go back and work through those themes and unpack what they mean for both the characters and the society they exist in. The more recent things I’ve written have been more along those lines too. Less graphic shocking violence, more philosophical as I pick my own brain and try to make sense of things.

Honestly writing this out helped me organize my brain a lot so idk hopefully it answered your question too.

And yes I know I’m sounding absolutely batshit but this is like my brain’s toxic sewer outlet valve. Believe it or not I am surprisingly normal in real life. I have a dog and big biceps and a cool rock collection and an office job with a nice view and everything. Anyways I’m passing out now. Night.

[bisluthq]

Do you think LOT prolonged Harry and Olivia’s relationship? I think they would’ve tried to save face for DWD’s sake either way but it’s interesting to me bc she clearly enjoyed and made the effort to be seen at his shows almost every week and the madness of everything was tied up in the tour for a while. So much of the intensity of their relationship seemed to be born out of covid restrictions limiting them to the house and her fertility causing them to speed run some decisions. I can’t picture what a tl looks for them where lot doesn’t happen so they’re at home more or jason doesn’t pick a fight with custody. It’s weird to think about now because the harry pre dwd and post dwd/olivia seem like different people to me and I can’t imagine him in that situation now. for all the genuinely traumatising scrutiny that must’ve been and I assume heartbreak over losing olivia and subsequently taylor, I think having a serious relationship that was 100x less publicised than holivia and having tour probably helped him process and made him think a lot about his choices

when I said it was a bit traumatic I didn’t even mean the public side of it lol (that too obviously and escalated the whole situation for sure), I meant like dating a woman going through what was essentially a divorce that included a very horrible custody battle that involved two kids and a really nasty ex is a WHOLE LOT for anyone but especially someone in their late 20s/early 30s imo who hasn’t had that type of experience before. Like NO ONE has fun during custody battles/divorces but at least if you’ve had your own experiences with them it’s like “okay here’s what I did” but Harry hadn’t had any experience with that beyond being a child of divorce and seeing Ann’s divorce with John and then seeing Robin really step the fuck up for Gemma and him? And I just imagine, even outside like the celebrity side of it, that that would’ve been really difficult. I’m basically his age, am a child of divorce, have seen my mum divorce twice more lol, am not in principle averse to dating someone with kids (haven’t ever but not like because it’s a rule for me) and have an older partner but ngl if my partner were going through a custody battle while with me I’d be very fucking stressed and I think pretty useless with advice and wouldn’t even be the best at the moral support side because it’s just like… quite far out of the realm of my own experience. And I do get the sense that Harry was hella overwhelmed lol and also again partly because of how much he loved/loves Robin and respected Robin, he was trying to do the right thing for Olivia and the kids but also like he’s not yk old enough per se to be in that position.

I don’t know what their whole situation would’ve been in another life where she’d left Jason in a classy fashion and had obtained a normal parenting plan and then started dating Harry. And also what it would’ve been like without LOT and all the DWD drama that was unrelated to them/this. Like that would’ve been a completely different tl and maybe it would’ve worked better because they clearly got along grand for the most part and did really love each other and if things were chill from Jason’s end like I don’t think the kids would’ve been a problem at all. I don’t think Harry would’ve tried to replace him or anything as their dad but also would’ve tried to be a good stepfather figure.

the biological clock thing would still have been an issue just because like she realistically needs to have a kid in the next few years if she wants more bio kids - she can’t really wait another 8 years or anything - but they did seem legit open to kids together idk so again without Jason drama + all the other crap then maybe it would’ve worked out. It didn’t.

and I agree the Taylor thing was healthier and probably helped him work through a few of the issues he’d built up over the past few years but clearly also didn’t work out and imo he should take it slow with the next girl and like see where things go and how they develop. Which again is why Olivia D or someone like her, who’s busy and not really in a rush to marry/have kids etc, would imo be a really good idea. He needn’t stay single but I also don’t think he should move in with someone and/or start talking rings and cradles in the next year or so lol. He should just chill for a bit.

[dimitrscu]

Is it just me or is the relationship between Malenia and Her Teacher, The blind swordsman not talked about Enough? The dude basically sealed away an outer god and when it showed back up in the body of a demigod child not only did he not kill her he took it upon himself to train her. Did they go on misadventures together? Did he show her the lake of rot underground? Do they still keep it touch lol? Their relationship is honestly underrated and it sucks we don’t know more about them

Hello anon, sorry for the late reply!

Yeah it is strange that we don’t know much about this guy. He must have been something though considering he was strong enough to banish and seal away an Outer God. I wonder how easy or difficult a feat that was to pull off? I’ve seen theories that he could have been one of the Nox which I find quite interesting, especially as the Nox Monk and Swordstress both use the same dodge and sidestep animations Malenia uses. I love the idea that he too would do that and she picked it up while training with him. I always imagine the two of them being a little like Syrio Forel and Arya Stark from Game of Thrones which I’m sure they took some inspiration from. After learning about him and the whole ‘water dancing’ thing it definitely stood out to me.

But something else I also wonder about is the God of Rot itself. Does it have a physical form? I mean I assume so, but I often wonder what it might look like. I’ve seen a few people depicting it as a giant scorpion creature before, mainly because of the Scorpion Stinger weapon found in the Grand Cloister. The description on the weapon certainly makes it sound that way at least.

So yeah, this guy battles a giant scorpion god and wins, sealing it away somewhere only for it to later return in the form of a curse within Malenia. And yet, like you said, he doesn’t kill her and instead chooses to helps her. Maybe he couldn’t bring himself to kill an innocent girl over something that’s not her fault and also out of her control, so instead he teaches her how to control her affliction.

I also wonder when they could have met? Malenia’s described as being a young girl in the Prosthesis-Wearer Heirloom description, so I’m guessing she was possibly in her teens. The timeline is, well, non-existent really so I would guess that she and Miquella were still living in Leyndell at that time. I’m not entirely sure when they left and moved to the Haligtree. So if she were living in the capital did he seek her out or was he summoned by Marika? Probably the former, but I do wonder if Marika and Radagon ever spoke with him at all. I know it’s popular among the fandom to think her parents don’t care about her, but memes aside I like to think they were at least doing something to try and help her.

The two of them may very well have travelled together a little. He could have taken her out to see the world and put her new skills to the test as part of her training. I'm not really sure if she's ever been to the Lake of Rot though, only because if the Outer God itself is buried down there somewhere then there's a chance Malenia being within close proximity could result in disaster. I don't fully understand the extent of the God of Rots influence on Malenia, but if there's a chance being close to it could have it take over and control her in some way then perhaps it would be better to keep her out of it's reach. I don’t know exactly the extent of it's influence on her like I said, but given that with each bloom Malenia loses part of herself, part of her identity, and starts to take on a new personality (the Goddess of Rot), and that she has to constantly fight off it’s presence, then I imagine if given half a chance it most likely would take control of her.

And as for if they keep in touch, well I guess that depends on whether he’s still around. If he’s mortal then he could well be dead from old age by now. But then again I’m not really sure what the life span of some of these characters are. There are some who think Miquella and Malenia for instance are in their 20’s and then there are those who think they are a few centuries old, so I guess it’s all up for the individuals interpretation. Maybe he is still around and every year he stops by the Haligtree on the twins birthday to give them a gift, and like wise she sends him a card of Father’s Day because lord knows he was probably a better father to her than Radagon was lol

Overall though I do feel he is a little underrated and I would love to learn more about him. Who knows maybe in the future they will do a comic series much like they are doing for Bloodborne and he might feature in one. His story is definitely an interesting one and ties in directly with one of the main characters after all.

Thanks for the message anon, hope you are well and are having a nice day!

[aspiringtrashpanda]

Waaaah (ෆ˙ᵕ˙ෆ)♡ ty tyyy!! I wasn't kidding about the length so I still apologize 😅😓 You know how when we’re younger we always wanted to get involved in the “cool stuff the big kids were doing,” whether said “big kids” to us were 13 or 16? When I was little, I wanted Steven to be my big brother or cousin. Since I never had any female cousins my age, I mostly grew up around boys and we did cool things like hang downstairs in their basement theatre, convince our parents to stop at a Walgreens for SillyBandz, and go wild jumping on the beds in their Hotel room with Light Sabers and Harry Potter Wands. (Look, I was like 9-10 this was cool to me 😂) We were a Trio, stuck in the backseat of the backseat of the car, status: gremlins in kahoots. It was weirdly poetic, there was only a year between either of us and I was the middle child. Really movie-like three Musketeering it here lol. Imagine how heartbroken I was when my parents told me they weren’t really my cousins, just really close family friends that we called them “cousin” regardless because they were there for my birth. Anyways, this and how whenever some older male that, I assume were probably late teens early 20s now that I’m older and thinking back, came over, kid me would see all the grown-ups talking to them like equals, being allowed to do “stuff” (it was probably like running an errand for an aunt or setting up tables tbh, I sure don’t know) and were asked about what they were studying at the dinner table, I thought it was so cool that I wanted to grow up fast and do whatever they were doing, go wherever they were going with their friends while I had to stay inside and help clean up because my mom said I wouldn’t be interested and that “they’re just doing their own thing.” Even at theme parks, couldn’t go with them.

Enter: The World of Pokémon. Discovering Fanfics, and the Found Family Trope. And Badass Young Protagonist Dreams we all might’ve had at some point. It’s a coin toss whether Crystal or LeafGreen was my first game, but I ended up really attached to Leaf (after a period of hating her because how DARE she look like my OC who was designed to look like me + the effect of early 2010s era of people hating OCs and only accepting canon characters in fics.) Though let’s be real, she probably looks like a lot of people, compared to having gravity-defying blue hair lol. It’s kind of hard to get May’s hair-style exact too sometimes if you don’t have bangs and short hair, and hers still flutter outwards by themselves. So anyways, this is all a lead-up to what brought me to thinking, “man, wouldn’t it be SO cool to be Champion and the bestest of buddies with the other Champions? (As the games usually sold the story to us)” Because friendship is awesome, teasing and banter and knowing personal things about each other and being considerate about it is sweet, being privy to secret projects the grown-ups never let you in on (I say secret project as if it’s some big thing when they probably wanted to enforce bed times and “that movie is too scary for you” lol) but anyhow, still epic.

I’ve never been able to bring myself to making another Pokémon OC, so I use Leaf as my stand-in for just about everything. I think the one thing holding me back from posting publicly is not everyone thinks the same as me. The game characters have no canon personality, so it looks weird. (Unless if I take influence from Evolutions, which validated so much for me.) They’re trapped in their games. And largely influenced by “majority accepted fanon.” As a result of that, I "should" be writing a wing-woman to the Red x Blue ship. My fic would probably go over better if I used May.

Okay, I have read everything through, but I am going to respond to each message one by one so I can get all my thoughts out! First off, thank you SO MUCH for sharing your brilliance with me. I am honored to get a peek inside your mind! This has been an incredible read. It sounds like you had so much fun with your cousins growing up, and I totally get what you mean about seeing older-but-still-young people doing stuff and you're like, "Hey i wanna hang out with them and tag along too!" But then you grow up and realize that you rushed through your childhood for nothing and ow, that's so real. RIP to all the OCs who fell to the flames of the early 2010s OC hate. OCs aren't for everybody (just like reader inserts), but those that will read an OC grow to love and appreciate them as much as any canon character. Though, there is also absolutely nothing wrong with projecting your OCs personality onto a canon character (if you're in our steven stone discord - which i mean, you're on anonymous so i'm not even gonna try to guess - you see that we do it ALL. THE. TIME.) I'll get more into canon personality vs. author interpretation vs. reader interpretation in the next bit, but I think it's important that you've recognized what you feel fandom has dictated you "should" do. You've recognized it. Now throw it out the window. Your fic will be its best self if you write what you want to write, and I promise, there WILL be someone who resonates with whatever character choice you make, whether they be in the minority or the majority. (To be continued...)

[milfsco]

today is one of my favorite dogs birthday and her mom (my favorite client) forgot and when i mentioned it this morning she started like slapping my arm (affectionately) and thanking me for reminding her and then when i brought her dog back from daycare she had gone out and bought cupcakes for me and my dog and i gave her a card i made for her dog + a toy for her dog and she got all happy and hugged me and told me she was gonna text me what the cupcake flavors were. and then she immediately did that and i sent her photos and videos of her dog from today and she told me i’m soooo amazing. anyway. when is she gonna confess her love for m

[gayerthanevertbh]

criminal.

you met a woman from a penpal website and began to form a relationship with her, until you suddenly got comfortable with her and began to share fantasies that she had also dreamt of.

pairings | prisoner!dark!natasha x fem!reader

warnings | 18+ MINORS DNI! online talking, prisoner!natasha, dirty talking (online), rough sex on the couch, strap-on (used), pet names, dark!natasha, and daddy kink.

word count | 3.5k 

notes | this was anon requested and i hope this satisfies you, nonnon! i’m so sorry if it’s too late :( i am doing my best to get all of your requests. enjoy though!

navigation

When I heard of this website called Pen Pal from my friends, I was sketched up. I wasn’t the type of person who would message someone from the internet–let alone a stranger who could break into your house if they had your address. You can’t trust the internet these days. The only reason why I know this website is because of the lack of relationships that I have never gone through in my life. Although I did have a few crushes, they liked me back, but eventually, it turned into nothing like a cloud of dust. Did I want to be in a relationship? Sure, sometimes.

Okay maybe.

Anyway, I was scanning through the website and saw some of the inmates who seemed desperate as I was. These people, specifically women, wouldn’t pass my age. That didn’t matter though, I’d still like anyone even though they weren’t my age. No one caught my interest, especially with their boring information about themselves. Looking for a babe, I want someone who could send me nudes, if you got tits then ur good. This is the information that I don’t need, they are too forward. If you want to speak eloquently about railing someone, you might as well do it in the second stage of dating.

Until I see a profile that did catch my interest. Natasha Romanoff, 36 years old. “I like making new friends.”

She’s a real eye-catcher.

And, she’s not your typical American, she looked too European to be American. Perhaps she was Russian and possibly was born from there, unless I may have assumed it in a wrong way. I decided to click on her profile and gave her a small greeting message.

Me: hey! :D

I didn’t wait much for her reply since I had Calculus homework that I had to do, so I grabbed my pencil and went back to studying. It was almost midnight when she replied, and I was tireless when I received her message.

NatsRomanoff: Hey there :) what suddenly brings you here?

What suddenly brings you here, I thought as I read that message. I could say: nothing much, I just want to say you’re really pretty or I want you to lick my neck with your devilish tongue so that I could be compelled to you. Although the second option was too forward, too soon. I decided to type something else.

Me: my friends told me about this website, idk why. i think it’s because they think i’m pretty lonely, plus it’s also fun. as they said.

NatsRomanoff: Hahaha, that seems cute. I hope the people here doesn’t scare you off unless you’re only talking to one person.

Me: i only plan to talk to one person and hopefully that’s you

NatsRomanoff: You must be adorable, what’s your name?

Should I give her a piece of information about myself? Would it be risky enough to say my name and let her rattle all over me? Or would I not let her in and continue on with my basic life? Yes, basic. My life in the outside world isn’t as fun as it seems. I go to school, learn a few things, have my piano lessons, and come back home with a gaunt look on my face that wasn’t too inviting. Go on, tell her! My head won’t stop telling me to do so, my fingers are on the keyboard as I try to think of any other names that I would use.

Me: Y/N. you?

NatsRomanoff: Pretty name :) Natasha, even though you can see that in my bio.

Me: sorry. i was trying to be formal lol

NatsRomanoff: What’s your sexuality? I don’t want to assume that you’re a girl or a boy, or neither.

Me: i’m a girl!

NatsRomanoff: Cute :) so can I call you a pretty girl then?

I try my hardest not to form a smile or a significant sparkling feeling inside of me as I know that I could fall for someone on the internet in less than a month. But heck, I blushed hard.

Me: yes, why not haha

NatsRomanoff: :)) how old are you, pretty girl?

Me: I’m nineteen, almost twenty in two months!

NatsRomanoff: That’s cute, really adorable I’m gonna be honest. You don’t mind talking to someone older, yeah?

I put my laptop away for a short minute and thought long and hard about our age difference. We were seventeen years apart, she’s almost two decades older than me and I have this sort of romanticization of being with older people. They bring so much comfort to you that you ought to believe that they will always protect you and be more mature than you are, so that’s probably the reason why I love being in that type of situation in the first place. Though, I could never be in one. My parents would kill me.

But they aren’t here, so…

Me: not at all. :)

NatsRomanoff: I’d ask if you could send me a photo of you, but you can’t do that here.

Me: Well, when do you get out of prison?

NatsRomanoff: Two years, pretty girl. Why? Care to visit a poor old woman like me? :)

Me: aren’t we friends?

NatsRomanoff: Of course, we are. I’d like to see you someday, hoping you wouldn’t run off.

Me: why would you say that? lol

NatsRomanoff: Aren’t you scared that I’m some old woman who is a prisoner? You don’t know my crimes.

Me: do you want to tell them to me?

NatsRomanoff: I’d keep it a secret for now :) but, I’d like to see you someday. Anyway, I have to go. Can I talk to you again tomorrow? Pretty girl? :(

The real deal question was: why wasn’t I scared? Why was I willing enough to give myself to a prisoner? I wouldn’t know what she has done, I wouldn’t know anything about her. But she seemed so kind enough that she doesn’t give me the peevish and creepy vibes that I’d always feel when it comes to other people–especially her age. I bit my inner cheek and thought about what to type with her calling me a pretty girl. Referring to me as one even though I hardly believe in such a name like that.

Me: of course, tasha! goodnight :)

NatsRomanoff: Goodnight, pretty girl.

                                                           —

The next few days went pretty smoothly and ambling. It felt like I was in this word heaven as I called it whenever I would be talking to Natasha. Perhaps paradise would be a fitting term for our messages. My friends knew about Natasha, they even told me to flirt a little. But I gave them a hint that I wasn’t ready for anything like that, knowing what they were trying to tell me. Natasha knew a few facts about me that I told her a few days ago. And she gave me small pieces of information about her too, which made me admire her more. Before she got arrested, she was working at a bar and would spend her quality time at the library, telling me that she had a spot that is now taken by everyone else. I told her that I also like reading and that’s how we mostly connect; we send each other book recommendations. Apparently, she likes The Bell Jar by Sylvia Plath, she said the book reminded me of her–even though that was a little confusing on why. I told her about the book called The Price of Salt because of my age difference with Natasha. She said she had read that one, and we both laughed about it.

NatsRomanoff: You seem like such a smart girl for your age :) What school are you going to?

I read her message, again and again, thinking if I should tell her what school I’m attending. My friends told me not to give any information that would lead to my address, but it’s Natasha, right? She wouldn’t hurt me, even though I’d only known her for five days. Plus, she constantly reminds me that I don’t have to say anything that would offend me.

Me: columbia University, i have a scholarship. :)

NatsRomanoff: You must be academically inclined then :) Love smart girls like you.

Me: lol what does that mean?

NatsRomanoff: I’m sure you know what I’m trying to say.

No, I don’t know what she’s trying to imply–does that make me feel stupid?

Me: anyway, i have to do some reading before i go to bed :(

NatsRomanoff: Aw, come on :( I want to talk to you some more, stay here baby.

I almost threw my laptop in the air as I read that word. Baby, I thought with a whimsical smile on my face. She’s getting into me. I imagine her being in my bed right at this moment, her hand on my knee as she tells me so many stories about herself before her life in prison. Touch me, Natasha. Put your hand on my core, massage it and tell me how much I can be yours. Whisper into my ear and tell me that I’m the prettiest girl you’ve ever seen, that you have to eat. That lewd thought quickly went away when I received another message from her.

NatsRomanoff: Can I call you baby?

Me: of course, you can.

NatsRomanoff: Good. I love us being friends, I haven’t talked to anyone like this in such a long time. I understand if you’re tired, I’ll message you soon. Goodnight, baby girl :)

                                                            —

Days have turned into weeks, weeks have turned into months, and I’ve caught myself falling in love with Natasha Romanoff, not knowing her criminal record or her basic life. Just a small fact about herself that she rarely tells me since she stated that she’s more interested in my life than hers. I didn’t mind, it’s not like I could ask her again, but it did get me wondering why on earth she wasn’t telling me in the first place?

I was lying down on my couch with a book sprawled all over my face, just like how I’d be in bed whenever I think about Natasha. We’ve said some dirty text to each other, but not in a way that we tell our fantasies to one another. I like to imagine a lot, it’s like I make them into my own little world and I drag her through it–let her know what I like and don’t like. I’ve never told anyone about my fantasy, nor hers. I guess we were practically the same people.

NatsRomanoff: I have something to tell you, but promise you won’t freak out.

Why would I freak out? Is she going to say something intense that would scare me off? There’s nothing that could scare me off when it’s only from her, or maybe that’s how submissive and giving I am.

Me: shoot.

NatsRomanoff: I have this fantasy of breaking into your house and watching you sleep. If not asleep, then you’d be standing there with a frightened look on your face. I would touch you without your consent and quiet you down since you’re a bad kitty. Is it okay if I say I want to touch you without your permission? How about if I slip my fingers inside of you without your permission? Would you still allow me? Just tell me to back off, I obviously won’t do anything if you say no. Think of it as a kink.

I felt myself beginning to get wet as I read through the whole message from her. She makes my body tremble with the need for her touch, how much I crave for her fingers or her tongue to lather up all over my skin. My face began to heat up like a kettle, my toes were curling against the sheets, and my hands were sweating as well as my forehead. I wanted what she wanted, I fantasized about it long before she did. Unless she has done it first, I wouldn’t really care. The fact that we share the same thought probably meant how much we are connected. I typed fast and sent it, moaning quietly with the raging thought of her breaking into my house with a threatening look on her face.

Me: that’s really hot, tash…

NatsRomanoff: Do you want that to happen, little girl?

Call me that again, call me your little girl, Natasha. I promise that I can be good to you, I’ll suck your thumb for you and kiss your neck, I’ll let you open me up and take me until I’m bursting into tears, you only know how to make my world shatter. You know.

Me: yes.

NatsRomanoff: Call me Daddy, baby.

Me: Daddy.

NatsRomanoff: You love Daddy?

Me: yes.

NatsRomanoff: I have a strap-on in my cell, did you know that? Before you, I’d fuck girls with it. And now whenever I see that toy, I just want to use it on you so badly. I bet your pussy is tight, are you a virgin?

To her disappointment, I wasn’t. I’ve had sex with a girl twice, but it wasn’t as good as I thought it would be. Losing your virginity should be special, and it wasn’t. As much as I want to say it felt nice, it’s not as good as I thought it would be. Or maybe, I was expecting an older person willing to take me instead. Could that be Natasha when she comes out in two years? I can’t wait any longer, I could feel my legs opening up for her.

Me: i’ve had sex before :( is that okay with you?

NatsRomanoff: That’s okay baby. I’m a little disappointed that you’ve had sex, but it’s alright. Promise me no one else will touch your pussy except me. Promise me.

Me: i promise.

NatsRomanoff: I love you, little girl. Can’t wait to see you.

That was her final message before she went offline, and it made my eyes quirk in confusion. Can’t wait to see you. Was there a possible chance that she escaped from prison and broke into my home, fulfilling our fantasies of one another? Couldn’t be true, she wouldn’t do such a thing.

I decided to close my laptop and turned off my lamp, my body shifting against the mattress while I had my legs pressed hard against each other–shamefully trying to get some friction that would make me think of her lewdly once more as my nipples started to perk with the chill thought.

                                                           —

I tried texting Natasha over and over again for a whole week, but she never responded. It took me time to realize that maybe she has met someone else who was willing to give themselves to her, to be much more open when it comes to sex. Was it because I was not a virgin? Did she shame me for that? Or maybe, just maybe, she has escaped prison and is finding my location?

Stupid, stupid thoughts. She wouldn’t know my location, but I’ve given her a hint now since I went to Columbia University. It’s not that I was frightened, maybe a little, but it was because I don’t know anything much about her that she’s capable enough to hurt me.

I tried surpassing the thought and went back home soundly with my keys jangling on my bag, it was attached to the metal zipper. Except that, the door was unlocked, which gave me a thought of someone breaking in. Could it be Natasha? Was she fulfilling the fantasies that we’ve created together? I shook my head and walked to the apartment–getting a different feeling from the atmosphere. Everything seemed normal, perhaps I might’ve forgotten to lock my home. I dropped my schoolbag on the ground and removed my jacket, the hair on my skin getting sensitive because of the cold mystic air from the outside of my window. I turned around and almost stumbled on the couch when suddenly I saw a figure who was standing in front of me, I didn’t know who it was.

“What the fuck?!” I exclaimed, stepping away from the redhead woman–who’s honestly very daunting–as I tried to find a piece of glass or any object that would be my self-defense. Instead, she gives me an evil smirk and wraps her free arm around my neck, pulling me close to her until I realize who this person was.

This was, in fact, Natasha Romanoff. She has escaped prison.

I didn’t even give her my address.

“Shh,” she coos over and over again, cupping my face tightly. I do admit I was trying to free myself from her, but she was so strong. “You’re so beautiful in real life, and so tiny. C’mere, don’t be scared. It’s me, Natasha, why are you trying to fret me?”

“L-Let me go!” I said, kicking off my feet.

“Shh, stop baby stop…”

“No!” I screamed kicking my feet again, my hands trying to push her chest. But God forbid, she was undeniably strong. Her arms were wrapped around my torso like it was a life sentence, I kept screaming until I felt her hand smack against my left cheek–making me whimper aloud.

“If you scream again,” she breathes heavily and nips on my earlobe so that I could feel her warm breath–my core is beginning to pool with wetness. “I will cut your tongue out. You better stay fucking quiet.”

She never let go of my body and instead, kissed me hard on the lips. It felt consensual since I let her do it, and I almost melted from the kiss that I wasn’t expecting from her. Her mouth felt warm and cooled my lips, and I realized how we were both famished for our lips to touch. I never thought about it happening this way, though it felt romantic and incredibly arousing as she kisses my lips hard and passionate. I was desperate for her not to pull away, but she did with a pant.

“Gonna fulfill that fantasy we both wanted,” she whispers with a low grunt, pushing me to the couch while unbuckling her belt. “I have my fat cock with me, and I know how much you’re going to like it. So better yet open your legs and show me that pretty pussy of yours.”

I did not waste time removing my pants and snapping my legs together as the air hit my wet cunt. She sees the action and furrows her eyebrows, her hands in between my knees as she pushes them away, departing if you have a deeper term. Her eyes were so dark that you couldn’t see much green in them and her mouth was foaming when my bare cunt was shown, my clit beating hard.

“Gonna give yourself to me, m’kay? Gonna fucking ruin this hole until you’re mine. In fact, I’ll have to hurt you if you disobey me. Might as well break your legs so that you could never run off from me, understood?”

“But–”

A sharp slap made contact with my inner thigh as I gasped out in pain, mostly pleasure. She watches my lips being bitten by me and almost wanted her dildo pressed against my mouth, slithering herself in until she fucks my mouth as if it was the gaping hole of my vagina. I was ready–so ready–to submit myself to her, to make her smack me until I bled. I wanted her to do everything she wanted, let alone if she had to take me in the ass. I stare at her and notice how hungry she was for my pussy, please just fuck me.

She pulls down her pants and I see a dark purple dildo that looked insanely big for my preferred size. I looked at her with horror but she was smiling down at me, meaningless to say I have no way out. She brings the tip to my entrance and thrusts inside of me with one go, my mouth screaming in pain and pleasure. In an instant, my hand was around her neck and I felt her mouth kissing mine again–though this one was a sloppier one.

“Fuck,” she murmurs more to herself, enjoying the sight of her cock fully inside of my cunt. “Look at you, taking a prisoner’s dick. Ya like that, don’t you baby? Want me to fuck you on this couch?”

I nodded.

She snaps her hips into me, making the couch squeak with how forceful it was. I was moaning with each thrust, my chest burning up at how fast the pace was going–I couldn’t take it, she was so big. Yet, I didn’t care. I wanted her to do this to me, I wanted her to take me until I’ve become such a slut for her that everyone would know who I belonged to. She buries her face into the crook of my neck as I hear her let out a whiny moan.

“Oh, baby! Mmph, you fucking feel so good…” she pushes my hair away from my face to take a better look at me, and she chuckles. Fucking chuckles. “You are a slut, aren’t you? Tell me you’re my whore baby, come on–tell Daddy.”

“I-I’m–” my breath hitches as I felt my breasts bouncing up and down with the speed of her shallow thrusts. I’ve grown wetter than I imagined. “I’m your whore, Daddy…”

“Daddy is crazy ‘bout you,” she sniffs into my neck heavily that I practically heard it. “Gonna make this pussy mine. I’ll make sure of it.”

this was insanely hot for me i’m sorry

[shurisneakers]

harmless (xiii)

Summary: Bucky volunteers to go stop a small time villain, but nothing can prepare him for what exactly he has to deal with. (Bucky x villain!reader)

Warnings: cursing, frustrated bucky, dramatic reader, smidge of angst, guns, little bit of violence, obnoxious flirting, and kidnapping lol

Word count: 6.2k

A/N: welcome to chaos week >:) this is the first of three updates coming out this week (if i can finish the last one in time).  big thank you to my love @no-shit-sherl0ck for the kidnaped!reader idea, and that one anon who suggested the inator that’s used here. i know you wanted to see it in a zoo but i couldn’t really figure out a way to use that so i referenced it a bunch in previous chapters. oh and also @ginevranights​ for this specific imagery 

Previous Part  || Series Masterlist

Who the fuck kidnaps a villain in this day and age?

Saturday started normally enough.

Nat kicked Bucky’s ass in training, evening the score to 120 and 120. He blames it on the lack of sleep. She tells him that it’s his fault he stayed up late to binge watch 911 Lone Star.

He still thinks it was worth it.

The team’s sunshines and rainbows that morning. Someone had cooked up a batch of pancakes and fresh orange juice. Someone else burnt the bacon but left to feed his dog before anyone could complain.

Nat opened up the newspaper. Different sections went to different people until Bucky got stuck with the entertainment section. Fun, considering that he doesn’t even recognise half the names. He’d have to pretend to be interested until the next rotation.

He watches the orange juice levitate in front of him from the corner of his eye and just assumes that Wanda’s getting a refill even though she could have just asked him to pass it. He smells the next batch of bacon burning and figures that Clint is back.

Sam’s beside him, annoying him about how long it takes for him to read about which new celebrity relationship just ended and Bucky retaliates by reading even slower. Fuck you.

He’s on his second stack of pancakes absolutely drenched in maple syrup when the doors to the elevator open and Marie steps out, laptop in her hand.

An instant chorus of hello’s and invitations to have some charred bacon resound through the table. She politely declines them with a small smile, instead opening her laptop and placing it in front of Bucky without further ado. 

He looks at her questioningly, slowly swallowing whatever was in his mouth.

“An email for you.” She tuts her head towards it. “It has a video attachment of your friend.”

Bucky has plans to not watch the video in front of everyone, given that the content could range anywhere from you reading out fanfiction about him to a deep-fake of him singing a Whitney Houston song.

Both of which you have done before and would do again, without any hesitation.

“Aren’t you gonna watch it?” Wanda asks from across the table.

He slowly shakes his head no, cutting his stack into smaller pieces.

“If what’s in it is real, it’s important,” Marie stresses.

“What’s in it?” he inquires instead, hoping that the team would stop staring at him. If Marie was implying strongly that he needed to watch then something was wrong.

“Just watch it, man.” Sam’s statement has everyone agreeing with him. Bucky can’t refuse now, and if the team makes fun of him for the next month about how he looks good belting Greatest Love of All, he’s going to personally assassinate you.

He clicks on the email, noticing it came from a throwaway address. Probably untraceable, if the cards are played right. 

The video opens to grainy footage, which is stupid considering modern technological advancements. If this is one more of your stupid LARPing sessions, it could definitely wait till after lunch. 

But, he instantly recognises your silhouette strapped to a chair and suddenly the room feels very cold around him. His hand automatically clutches onto a bead from the bracelet you gave him that still remained tied to his left arm more often than not.

“Speak,” someone commands off camera.

“About what?” You sound annoyed, exasperated even.

“Why you’re here.”

“I’m here because you have unaddressed feelings of childhood insecurity.”

“I warned you to take this seriously.”

Bucky’s eyes widen slightly but his body relaxes the minute he reads the situation. 

The team’s crowded around him, he can feel it. His attention remains on the screen in front of him.

“Who even are you sending this to?” You don’t sound the least bit threatened. “My roommate’s not at home but my cat is and I don’t think she’d care.”

”You’ve made a complete joke out of villains everywhere. Fraternising with the enemies, the Avengers,” he spits the name with so much vitriol. “You’ve erased what it’s like to be truly evil. Turned us into a laughing stock.”

“If it takes one person to undermine your whole movement then maybe it wasn’t strong enough to begin with.” You look at someone outside the lens, face scrunching in distaste. “Also your costume’s ugly.”

“F.R.I.D.A.Y., can you trace this voice?” Bucky asks, receiving an immediate confirmation. “Figure out who it is.”

“On it.”

“Tell them. Tell them we are a serious threat and are to be feared.”

"No,” you say resolutely. “You’re an overgrown manchild. Go watch Teletubbies or something.”

“She does not give a shit,” Clint marvels at the situation, a piece of half eaten burnt toast between his fingers.

You didn’t. And if he knew you in the slightest, which he prided himself on at this point, you already had six different ways of getting out of there.

“She knows she’s going to be fine,” Bucky murmurs, returning back to take a bite of his pancakes. “She’s probably still there just to irritate him.”

He zeroes in on your wrist to see if the teleportation watch was still there but no, your wrists are bare. Guess you forgot.

“You have to.”

“Why?”

“Because that’s how a real villain does it.”

“A real villain- what are you, gatekeeping the villain community?” You scoff. “You sound like a fuckin’ incel.”

“Just send them a message,” the guy bellows, hitting a table.

“She’s going to frustrate them to death.” An accurate observation, Sam.

“Okay, jeez, fine.”

Bucky just knows that you rolled your eyes at that moment.

He had faith in you, or in your abilities at the very least. While every wisecrack could possibly inch you closer towards harm, you probably wouldn’t be making them unless you felt completely secure in your situation.

“Help, I’m totally kidnapped and in danger. Save me because I can’t do it myself. This man is too powerful and strong and sooo scary.”

“Do you think she has a strategy?”

“Definitely.”

“You’re not worried, James?” Wanda asks curiously. “I thought she was your friend.”

“She is my friend.” He reaches over to take the jug of orange from across the table. “That’s why I’m not worried.”

“Are you going to fight the Avengers?” you interrupt his endless tirade. “Because that’s a stupid plan. You get how that’s a stupid plan, right?”

“Let them come. I’m prepared.”

“With what? A stick you found outside? A Nerf gun? Man, you’ve tied my hands with fuckin’ zip ties, you can’t be serious-”

“Shut up,” he roared and the stand shakes slightly from where he stamps his feet. “Our army is enough.”

“Wow,” you exhale. “I wish I had your confidence, I really do. I want to study you under a microscope.”

“I have reinforcements.” It sounds like he turns to the camera to address it directly. “This is a warning. Your friends have an hour to find you or things are gonna turn ugly. This is what real evil looks like.”

“Evil dresses in a dollar store Speedo, apparently.” The man pays you no heed, instead picking up the camera. “Hey, sarge, if you’re watching this, don’t bother. I’m fine, it’s not even the real me-”

The camera cuts to black.

“When was this video sent?” Nat looks at Marie, eyebrows drawn together.

“About ten minutes ago.”

Bucky clicks out of the email, determined to get at least half his breakfast in him before he left to see what’s up with your situation. A notification pops up immediately.

evilkneival123@gmail.com just sent you an email.

A video attachment.

“We got another one,” Bucky informs the team, drawing their attention back to the screen from the informal conversation that had erupted between them about what they could do.

This time, there’s a subject line included.

Attack on the Clone.

"Ain’t that a Star Wars movie?" he asks, craning his neck to look at Clint.

"That's Attack of the Clones," Sam corrects. "Probably autocorrect."

Bucky narrowed his eyes in suspicion at him, jaw sliding outward before falling back into place. Enough times had Sam called him Fucky in the group chat and gotten away with it for him not to be wary.

“Or a code,” Wanda suggests, too many crime thrillers read and podcasts listened in her spare time. She occasionally brought them over to Self Care Saturday, introducing him to the world of true crime as a bit of light content while they snacked on chocolate chip cookies he baked. “Like the Zodiac.”

“For what?” Bucky peers over at her.

“All I remember from that movie is them rolling around a field together,” Clint mutters. “Maybe that’s how you’re supposed to save her.”

“I’m not saving anyone. Look at her, she’s fine.” Is he the only one who saw it?

When he’s met with skeptical looks and no other useful suggestions, he presses play on the video.

This time it's clearer footage. It hardly takes him a second to ascertain where it was.

"That's her lair." It showed the pathway leading up to the flat concrete building, exactly where the intercom should be.

There was a black Sedan parked haphazardly outside, engine still on judging by the sound of the radio blasting an AC/DC song. 

Within a few seconds, someone drags you from the entrance of the lair to the car, despite your very clear protests and opposition, shoving you inside before it takes off in full speed, tires screeching. 

"F.R.I.D.A.Y., track the car from that video. Check all the CCTV and surveillance footage from around the area that you can find," Bucky commands, taking a sip of orange juice.  

"Why would they send us that?" Clint pipes up. "They make their email untraceable but send us a video of the fuckin' abduction itself?"

"I don't know." Bucky shakes his head, setting his glass down. "She probably convinced them to."

It was an unusual scenario, he realised that. But his eyebrows lower in contemplation, his lip caged between his lip before a thought suddenly occurs to him. A laugh in disbelief almost escapes his throat ad he pushes it down with some freshly cut strawberries. 

"And they listened?"

"I don't think you realise how annoying she can be." He knows, though. He knows. "Bet they regret it, though. I should tell them to keep her for a little longer."

"Voice recognition registers voice to someone named Chad, better known by his alias Soul Crusher. Surveillance footage places the car about thirty minutes away. Exact location sent to your phone GPS."

Soul Crusher. That was worse than Dr. Strange.

"I can make that fifteen." Bucky shrugs, setting down his fork and knife. If his hunch is right, the team didn’t really have to get involved. “See you guys later.”

“Do you want any of us coming with you?” Wanda gestures to the crowd at hand.

“I got it.” He pushes away from the table, depositing his plate in the sink, dropping an extra piece of bacon on the ground for Clint’s dog. “She’ll be alright.”

They watch him trail out of the room briskly, heading up to his room to change.

“Is it just me or is he too casual about this?” Clint continues staring long after he leaves.

“Both of them are weirdos.” Nat pulls open the newspaper again, going back to the sport’s section. “Who knows what goes in their heads.”

“Can confirm that not a lot goes on in his.”

Without Bucky to retaliate or grumble, a Steve walking into the room, sweaty and shiny after training becomes the new subject of jokes that morning.

__

For the first time in months, he’s had to bring a weapon or two along with him. Two revolvers and a couple of knives kept out of plain view. He wouldn’t need more than that anyway.

True to his word, it takes only fifteen minutes to get there, thirteen if he didn’t stop for the chain of ducks that crossed the street.

He’s also dressed in a little more leather than he usually reserves for your meetings. A jacket that brings to act as a windbreaker and tightly laced up combat boots make him look like he either stepped off a runway, or more menacing than usual depending on who was looking.

The GPS points him to an old warehouse near a more subdued part of the city. It was abandoned by the looks of it, and had been for a while judging by the lack of upkeep. Prime real estate.

He pulls off his helmet, hanging it on the handlebar along with his backpack before kicking the stand into place. The bike’s a few metres away just in case they decide to blow something up.

Bucky looks up at the warehouse, assessing the most damage he could do to it if at all it was needed. That thing could barely stand on its own, a grenade would absolutely decimate it. That wasn’t good news for you.

He sighs once before putting on his death glare, straightening out his shoulders into a stature that screams stone-cold, and pushes the door open, gun raised.

A mini-army of people ranging from their early twenties to late thirties stood guard at the entrance, all with rifles pointed at him. He counts fifteen, maybe eighteen.

“Oh, hell no,” a voice erupts from the back, followed by the sound of his gun being thrown to the ground. “No one told me that he was coming.”

Bucky raises an eyebrow, his death glare not shifting and Glock not lowering.

“I’m out.” The same guy raises his hands up to show he meant no harm, slowly brushing past Bucky as he squeezed out of the building.

“You got five seconds to leave before I shut this door,” Bucky gives the rest of them an ultimatum. Not like there was a point anyway. SHIELD was sending down some people to account for the one day rise in new morons. 

They all looked at each other, swallowing thickly before raising their weapons.

“I hope he’s giving you good insurance.” The second he finishes his sentence they all cry out in what sounds like a fucking war chant, launching themselves at him. 

______

“They’re here.” Someone presses his ear to the door as if the gunshots and screaming weren’t enough. 

“Brilliant. We’re ready.” Chad picks up the knife, running his finger along the sharp end. You try to see if you can use your Twitter-ordained powers of manifestation for a paper cut.

“How much are you asking them for?” You put forth a query instead, when it disappointingly doesn’t work.

“Asking who for what?” Chad stops his dumb intimidation tactic for a second. 

“You know,” you insist like it was obvious, “my ransom. How much did you ask them to pay?”

“We didn’t-” He looks around at the other people in the room for confirmation. “-we didn’t ask for any.”

“Because I’m invaluable?” Your head droops to the side in mock flattery. “Aw, you guys.”

“We didn’t think of it,” someone from the corner behind you speaks up, coming to the aid of their boss.

“Now that’s just rude.” You tut, shifting maybe an inch or two in your bounds to try and get more comfortable. “Leaving aside your lack of preparation, let’s just assume he bursts in here, desperate and ready to bargain. How much would you ask for?”

“Three million,” Chad says confidently, gathering a nod and sounds of agreement from everyone else.

“Are you serious?” Your jaw drops, a scoff escaping you. “That’s all?”

His self-assurance falters a little bit, you can see it under his 5 Minutes Craft mask.

“Three mill-” You stop mid-sentence. “With this wiring? Ridiculous. Make it ten, I demand it.”

“We’ll ask for fifteen mil,” Chad proposes, his teammates agreeing again, a little more delighted than last time.

“Ask for thirty, you coward,” you argued. “Thirty million and a jet.”

“You’re not worth that much.” The dipshit diagonal to you pipes up with his unwanted and, frankly, useless opinion.

“And you are?” You whip around the best you can. “Henchman number four?”

“Megedagik,” he informs, standing up a little taller now that he was given some importance. “It means ‘killer of many’.”

“Did you just say your name was Mega Dick?” 

“Megedagik,” he corrects.

You stare at him hard before turning away. “Alright, other than Mega Dick here, does anyo-”

A knife lands right next to your feet, driven at least an inch into the ground. You look up at the guy you managed to piss off within four sentences, his face now a beet red. 

“These are brand new, asshole,” you barked, shaking your shoes around. “You’re gonna pay if there’s even a scratch on it.”

“Permission to kill her?” Meg growls, casting a side eye at Chad.

The boss man looks at you thoughtfully, assessing the repercussions of what might happen. You raise an eyebrow.

“Slow and painful,” he settles. 

A small smirk makes its way onto your face. 

“Title of your sex tape,” you quip as the man in the corner storms towards you.

_____

It’s all a flurry, really. A bunch of inexperienced newcomers versus one of the most skilled assassins the world had ever seen? Ten minutes tops.

Bucky doesn’t do any serious damage. A couple of broken bones but only out of necessity, a lot of concussions, and maybe a bullet wound, or three, here and there. 

Most of the time he spends thinking about things that have absolutely nothing to do with what was going on. He forgot to take his laundry out of the machine. There was a biscotti recipe he had been procrastinating on trying. His succulents needed watering but he could do that once he was back. Was he wearing his good combat pants or was it the pair that had a hole in the pocket?

His left hand thrust outwards to shove someone away while he stuck his right hand into his pocket to check if it had frayed away. The person he pushed slams into a wall with a loud groan and no, his pants didn’t have a hole in them. 

He stops to take a breather, assess what was going on. There are bodies scattered all around, mostly writhing in pain from minor injuries. Someone very bravely stands up, hands posed in front of him in a regular fighting stance.

“You sure about this?” Bucky asks, reaching for one of the concealed knives he hadn’t had a chance of using yet. It twirls rather nimbly between his fingers for something so dangerous, the hilt finally landing in his palm for a sturdy grip.

The man takes one look at the knife before sitting right back down on the ground. 

“Good choice,” his voice drops to an octave lower than his self-esteem. He’s tired of this old routine but it works like a neat little party trick, often getting him the result he wanted. “Where?”

A few fingers point down the hall to the only room whose door was closed.

He makes sure to step over everyone who was lying along the way, ears tuned in to even the smallest of noises just in case one of them decided to attack him from the back. It doesn’t come.

He doesn’t bother creeping down the hallway. With all the ruckus that just went on outside, he’s pretty sure it’s obvious that they had an intruder. 

Bucky kicks in the large steel door with ease, given that it was barely hanging on its hinges. His gun’s raised, muscles tight, and senses on high alert for any immediate threats. 

It lands with a large thud, reverberating through the room. He’s reminded of your first meeting with him.

There’s a chair in the middle of the room with a person tied to it by a mixture of rope and tape. Others found themselves slithering around on the floor in a similar fashion, trying to get out of their bondages.

“Hey, James,” you call out, drawing his attention to you. You were sitting atop a table, legs swinging back and forth without a care in the world, a blade in your hand. 

“You okay?” He tucks the gun into his waistband when he realises that none of the henchmen are going to be going anywhere soon.

“All good.” You hop off the table with a little spring in your step. “Did you bring your bike? I need a ride back to the lair. I think I left the TV on when I was, you know, getting kidnapped.”

“You coulda teleported back home before all of this even happened.” Bucky does a quick assessment of your body to make sure there weren’t any bruises or anything of the sort. “Avoided the whole thing.”

“Don’t have the watch with me.” Odd, since he knows you consider it one of your essentials but it just fuels his theory further. “Besides, if I just quit before we started, they’d keep messing with me over and over again.”

“Do you want me to punch someone’s face in?” He glances around the room at the ones wiggling about on the floor like fucking worms. “I’d be happy to.”

“Nah, I got a few in myself.” You rotate your wrist, other hand still holding onto the knife. “You know what, maybe I’ll have another go.”

He simply makes a noise in acknowledgement before he places a hand on the hem of your shirt, gently reeling you back. “I think you fixed ‘em up real good. That’s enough for today.”

“Fine but only ‘cause you said so.” You huff, looking past him and at the weirdos on the ground. “You hear that? This man just saved your life. Say ‘thank you’.”

A muffled chorus of what sounded like appreciation echoed through the room. Bucky awkwardly looks around.

“Damn right.” You walk over to the guy in charge of the whole event, bending down to his level. “If you ever try to fuck with us again...”

You stare straight into his eyes, unblinking. You hold up the knife to his Adam’s apple. Chad doesn’t dare to move other than the thick swallow.

You raise your finger and flick him in the forehead. “Get a better costume.”

The corner of Bucky’s lip quirks upward.

“Let’s go, sarge,” you announce, standing upright again and making a motion to follow you. “D’you have an extra helmet I could use?”

“Yeah.” He had brought one along in his bag, assuming that you’d need one once he noticed the watch was missing in the footage.  

“Yay.”

The only storage space on his bike was under his seat and it’s just enough for an extra revolver. Clint asked him if it was his way of flirting with someone, give ‘em a quick spin around the city and then show them his gun. If looks could kill, Clint would be 7 feet under. 

“You sure you wanna ride it, though?” He cringes immediately when he realises what it sounds like, waiting for you to smack the innuendo in his face. “We could wait for SHIELD.”

“Don’t really have another choice, Bucky,” you say absentmindedly, strolling out the room as you tossed the knife behind you.

He frowns at your indifference but turns around for a second to look at Chad. The man in question looks back viciously, his grandeur from that morning basically deflated and left to die along with his reputation.

“Might wanna reconsider the name,” Bucky remarks, doing a quick sweep of the area once more. “Soul Crusher.”

He waits until both of you are outside the cell and the door is shut on the ringleader and his circus clowns, handlebar twisted out of place so that they don’t escape for the time being.

“One second,” he calls, touch gently lingering on your forearm to stop you without even thinking twice about it. A famously uncharacteristic move for him.

"Hm?” You don’t even look like you notice his action.

“You sure you’re good?” he asks seriously, actual concern slipping through the question. “Do you need medical assistance?”

“They couldn’t hurt me anyway.” There’s something strange about the way you say it, almost assuredly. “I’m good.”

“Okay,” he concedes, his hand darting back when he realises it was still on your arm. His eyebrows furrow when he realises how instinctively he had reached out in the first place.  He didn’t touch anyone, ever.

“What are we gonna do about them?” you inquire, stepping over someone on the floor to get to the exit.

“Marie told Agent Hill. They’re sending someone over.”

“They’re sending SHIELD for these wannabes?” Someone groans in protest from somewhere and you elect to ignore them. “Ew.”

“Just to make sure confidential information isn’t compromised in any way.” There’s a large bang that comes from the room they just left. Maybe one of them shot their teammate by accident. They were more than capable of doing it.

“I would never,” you exacted a little more solemnly, pushing the door open with your elbow to let the sunlight flood in.

“I know.” He doesn’t realise how dark it was in the warehouse until he steps out into the noon sun. “I’m pretty sure this is more about the fact that you were abducted.”

“For me?” The smile doesn’t quite reach your eyes the way he kinda likes. Something definitely felt off. “I love being class favourite.”

He doesn’t reply, a small grunt as he twists the handle of the warehouse door upwards, effectively jamming it. 

“Can I drive?” You bat your eyelashes at him innocently, disregarding the loud screaming that came from inside as those less injured probably regrouped for a last ditch attempt. 

“No,” he doesn’t hesitate in replying, handing you a helmet and buckling his own securely.

“But I just got kidnapped,” you complained, watching him swing a leg over the bike and straddle it. Okay then. 

“All the more reason for you not to drive right now.” He mentions for you to get on, squinting at the warehouse a few feet away.

“Fine, but next time I’m driving,” you grumble, climbing on the back.

“Do you even know how to?” His head is tilted to look at you from the corner of his eye, voice heavier on account of the obstruction on his face.

The door starts shaking violently and he knows for a fact that it won’t hold up for much longer. Some of those who he had knocked out probably had been shaken awake again for manpower. 

“I can learn.” You take a pause, mischief seeping into your next words. “You can teach me.”

“No.” He didn’t exactly practice what was considered safe, law abiding driving. He just got from one point to another and that’s all he cared about.

“Then I’ll do it myself.” You sound determined. “I’m going to leave a note for us in the lair.”

“You do that.” He revs the engine when something solid hits the metal door. As guessed, their usage of props to push it down faster was coming into play. “Now, can you hold on to something? We need to go.”

If only those idiots just realised that the windows covered by newspapers were right there, ready to be broken.

“Only if you promise to let me drive next time,” you say defiantly, drawing this whole ordeal out.

“Whatever,” he urges. “I promise. Now can we go?”

“Wait for it...” There’s a devilish smile on your face. “One.”

There’s a loud creak as the door finally gives way.

“Two.” The same people you left tied up in the room burst out, almost stumbling over each other in the process.

“Three,” he completes it on his own, not waiting for you to finish because God knows how long you’d stretch it out just for the drama.

Your excited screech of laughter as he narrowly misses a rod that gets thrown at him like a fucking javelin temporarily distracts him from the brain freeze he gets when your arms wind around his waist to hold yourself in place. 

There’s angry screaming and bullets that whiz past in an attempt to get him to stop but a swift turn around a corner, pulling the both of you out of their sight is enough to get rid of them. 

“We should get a few weapons and go back,” you yell over the wind rushing by, barely audible.

“You do that in your own free time,” he shouts in response, yanking you through narrower lanes and less popular streets.

“Maybe I will, you bore.” 

Still, you shut up for the rest of the ride, only grumbling when he stops the bike to tell you that no, you cannot let go just because you want to throw your hands in the air like in the movies.

You hop off when he finally pulls up on the street outside your lair, adrenaline still pumping through your veins. He waits patiently as you unbuckle the helmet, switching off the engine. 

“You gonna drop me off at my door too, now?” You snicker, fingers pulling off the helmet.

He looks at you for a second before dropping the kickstand into place and dismounting from the motorcycle.

“I was kidding.” You laugh, handing him your headgear that he shoves into his backpack. 

“You’re pretty capable of gettin’ abducted along the way.” An absurd notion, considering it’s a short path from the road to the door. 

“Oh, how chivalrous.” You let him tag along anyway, for his peace of mind. 

“My ma didn’t expect any less.” A couple of sharp lessons from Winifred Barnes and Bucky was nothing short of a damn angel. 

You knock on the door three times, crossing your arms over your chest as you waited. 

“Aren’t you the one with the key?” Bucky questions, one hand on his waist. 

The door swung open in the middle of his sentence revealing... you.

Another you.

“Nah, she has it.” Ex-Kidnapped-You raises your head in acknowledgement at Doorway-You.

“Ah.” He fucking knew it. An unnatural sense of smugness blossoms in his chest. 

“Hey,” the both of you said at the same time.

Doorway-You looked way more relaxed, a little less grimy and dishevelled but exactly the same.

“Buck, I see you met my other half,” the you from the doorway greets him. “Or other whole, actually.”

“Sure did.” He sends a glance at Ex-Kidnapped-You.

“You can go on in. Big first day, huh?” Doorway-You refers to the you beside him.

“You wouldn’t believe,” Ex-Kidnaped-You mutters, pushing past the entrance and disappearing inside.

“She gonna be okay?” His gaze trails after your clone.

“Oh yeah, just needs to recharge.” You turn around to make sure she’s fine. “She’s made of some pretty strong carbon, technically almost indestructible.”

No wonder ‘you’ said they couldn’t hurt you.

“Heya, sarge.” You draw his attention back to you. “Always good to see you.”

“Can’t really say the same about you.” 

“Ever the emotional repressor, Mr Barnes. I like this little leather show you got going, did ya wear it just for me?”

He shifts his balance to his other foot, feet slightly wide apart. “Take it that the clone machine finally worked?”

“I was in the middle of celebrating.” You sigh, recalling the events of that morning. “Teleported home for a second to get some champagne and when I came back she was gone.”

“Irresponsible.” He tsks, head shaking in disappointment. 

“Sorry I didn’t take amateur kidnappers into account for my risk factor analysis, Bucky,” you shoot back, pressing on his name for added annoyance. “Anyway, I did the responsible thing. I sent all the evidence I had to you guys.”

“Real clever.” Bucky looks at you in dry amusement. “Attack on the clone? Really?”

“Hey, always make time for a good pun.” You finger gun, lopsided grin on your face. “Did the team like it?”

“They thought it was a typo.” Or a code. He really had Wanda to thank for his big revelation. “Your video didn’t help either.”

“Don’t tell me they couldn’t make out it was me.” You laugh, crossing your arms over your chest.

He doesn’t reply, pursing his lip inwards in sympathy, but more so to conceal a smile.

The happiness drops from your face slowly, horror taking its place. “Don’t tell me they couldn’t make out it was me.”

“Good job, your machine worked,” he adds helpfully.

“C’mon, there were so many differences,” you whine, the success of your endeavour the last thing on your mind. 

“That is your literal clone,” he points out, only to see you- clone you- walk into the giant box in the corner of the room, bright green light emanating from it like a xerox machine.

“How could they not tell the original apart from a copy?” You look genuinely offended. Insane. “Not even Sam?”

“Guess you’re not unique enough.” A rise and fall of his shoulders signify his attitude towards this whole thing. “Think I like your copy better, too, actually.”

“You’re so mean.” You puff in disbelief. “I’m a 100% original. How many mad scientist teachers do you know?”

“Two.” 

“I don’t mean now, that’s not even the-” You poke at his rock hard chest. “You are so much more annoying than when I first met you.”

He thinks it’s good relationship development.

“I have to deal with you every weekend.” He watches your finger drop from his chest. “Picked it up along the way.”

“Boo hoo, talking like you don’t have deep, deep feelings for me.” You roll your eyes. “I see right through you, Bucky Barnes.”

“Can you see the part that couldn’t give less of a shit?” He gestures to himself. “It’s all of it.”

“You think you’re such a comedian, huh?” You narrow your eyebrows. “How did you know she was a fake then, huh?”

Busted.

“Probably ‘cause you didn’t talk as much today,” he dodges. “Actually had some peace of mind for a change.”

“You knew before you got there, you liar.” You push past his fabrications. “You figured it out before everyone else.”

“You literally put it in the title.”

“Yeah, but the rest of the team saw it too.”

“Rest of the team didn’t know you were building a goddamn clone machine for months.”

“You remembered that?” You pulled away, palm over your heart. “Oh, sarge, you paid attention to me.”

His nose twitches.

“You said it, like, eight hundred times.” He could use both his hands to count the number of references you had offhandedly made in the last three weeks alone.

“Why'd you go save me when you knew it wasn't real?” you continue to challenge relentlessly, knowing fully well that he was fibbing. 

“Because you fuckin’ peer pressured me. Had the whole team around me when you sent your little video during breakfast.”

“Just admit it,” you coo, ignoring all his justifications. “You noticed it was fake me right away but showed up anyway because you’re wildly in love with me.”

“No,” he says stiffly. 

“No as in you won’t admit it you have a crush on me, or no as in you didn’t know it was fake me?”

There was no winning this. 

“Good day to you.” He pulls the motorcycle helmet on to hide the expression that plain as day screamed the former of your two options.

“Also,” you bring up indignantly, “she even got to ride the fucking bike and I’ve been asking to drive it for months now!”

“We-” he chooses his words carefully. “-compromised.”

“Oh, you did?” Your voice lowers at the newfound information, interest piqued. “I’m gonna hold you to that then, whatever it is.”

“Doesn’t count.”

“Absolutely does,” you huff. “A promise is legally binding. Blue’s Clues taught me that.”

“Bye, Y/N.”

“You’re my knight in leathery armour,” you swoon, switching sides immediately, “Kinda.”

“See you next week,” he says in farewell, determined to leave before you made it worse. “Try not to get killed by then.”

“Why, so you can do it yourself? Protective much?” You pull him back when he starts walking away, laughing slightly. “Wait a second, you weirdo.”

He sighs, staying put anyway, arms crossed impatiently over his chest.

You pull out the pen tucked behind your ear and slowly tap him twice on each shoulder in a makeshift knighting ceremony. “For your sacrifice.”

He rolls his eyes at the ludicrousness, tongue clicking against the roof of his mouth.

You ignore his lack of enthusiasm, pressing your fingertips to your lips in a small kiss and then to his nose, given that it was the only part of his face you had access to.

“That was for your bravery.” You grin brightly at him and he sure as hell is glad he’s wearing the stupid helmet because he can feel his cheeks light up a bright crimson.

“Thanks.” His voice sounds gruffer than a second ago. He clears his throat.

“Now you’re my knight in leathery armour,” you fawn, nearly falling over yourself dramatically. “Let’s ride into the sunset together. I love you.”

“You’re ridiculous,” he calls out over his shoulder, turning away to return to his bike. “I despise you.”

“But you don’t.”

He really didn’t.

also i managed to fuck my phone up really bad so all proceeds from my ko-fi go towards getting it fixed

Next part

[davids-cartoon-corkboard]

Episode 10: The Samadhi Fire

(original thoughts here)

Nezha sounds a bit younger in the flashback, maybe in his “late teens”? Journey to the West was inspired by the pilgrimage of a real monk named Xuanzang, which took place in the 600s. Assuming the Journey in Lego Monkie Kid took place at around the same time, that’s almost 1400 years ago from our perspective; given that the show’s setting is somewhat futuristic, I’d add at least another century on top of that. It’s no surprise that Nezha aged a little during that time (or did voice training to seem older, lol).

Tang Sanzang, Zhu Bajie, and Sha Wujing all have the same voice actors as Tang Shifu, Zhu Dachu, and Sha Dali, respectively. That’s... that’s gotta be difficult for Sun Wukong in the modern day, being around people who look and sound so much like his past companions, but are (as far as he knows...) total strangers.

---

We hear some of White Bone Spirit’s creepy ghost whispers as her hold on Macaque breaks, so she’s almost certainly aware it happened.

Though Sun Wukong was the only one who reacted to her little “destiny cannot be undone” quip, so I think that was him remembering something she said to him in the past, rather than something she was saying in that moment.

We got that line as SWK was actively strangling Macaque, it’s likely another hint that WBS was involved with the fight between them- perhaps she whispered doubts and falsehoods to them, and their fight wouldn’t have been as intense or as deadly without her influence?

---

It’s... interesting that Sha Dali was the one to point out that Long Xiaojiao is descended from Ao Lie, rather than that line being part of SWK’s explanation. Sure, Sha Dali was there for her family exposition back in “Coming Home”, but Ao Lie was never mentioned then; he’d have no way to know Ao Lie was specifically her ancestor and not a distant uncle or cousin... unless he’s secretly Sha Wujing and thus knows more than he lets on, but that idea is totally bonkers, right? 😉

---

SWK is looking at LXJ’s dragon form as she verbally eviscerates him. While he knows LXJ is the one speaking, he probably feels like these words are coming from Ao Lie.

“We trusted you! All of us! How could you lead us into this fight without a real plan? Time and time again, I’ve watched you put [us] in danger, leaving [us] to figure out everything on [our] own! Don’t you realize you’re hurting the people who care about you the most?”

Is that why SWK is so adamant about not accepting help from others? Did the other Journey members die in the process of sealing WBS? Does he blame himself for their deaths?!

---

What’s up with this forest location? We know that ordinary water cannot extinguish the Samadhi Fire, is this lake(?) magical in nature? That would explain why Red Son was there; if he sensed the Fire activating, naturally he’d look for such a useful resource.

Presumably he still has LXJ’s spare phone from “Revenge of the Spider Queen”, so she'll be able to call the T.E.A. squad and let them know where she is.

-----

(Ep. 1) (Ep. 2) (Ep. 3) (Ep. 4) (Ep. 5)

(Ep. 6) (Ep. 7) (Ep. 8) (Ep. 9) (Ep. 10: You Are Here)

[sitp-recs]

What fic d’you think has the best/cleverest plot, you’ve read? Mainly looking for recs, but also pretty curious; you seem to have a pretty wide range of tastes (side note: how do you find so many amazing fics to read? Like. Jealous. And where do you find the time? Between work and classes and family I’d never be able to do this. Impressive… sorry, off topic.)

What an interesting ask, thank you! To answer the second part - I’ve been reading fic for many years now, and when I created the blog I had nothing but a dull internship and a final paper to worry about, so I started reccing the fics I already loved and time wasn’t really an issue! But I’ve been struggling a lot lately, especially after I finished my Masters and changed jobs. Now with a puppy I barely stay awake at night, let alone enjoy quality reading time 💀 I haven’t read a new fic in ages, reclists are the only thing keeping this blog alive because I don’t need to think too hard lol

And yes, my fic tastes are pretty vast! I enjoy a bunch of different things depending on my mood, and I have a few go-to tropes & authors that usually work for me if I’m not sure about what to read next. You asked for clever plots, these are my personal favorites! I’m curious to hear everyone else’s thoughts, so feel free to add to this post :)

And Save Me From Bloody Men by @blamebrampton (2010, T, 10k)

Draco Malfoy once watched others fighting to stop the world falling apart. This time, he's not just watching.

The Eighth Tale by @letteredlettered (2012, E, 12k)

Draco Malfoy tries to fix the past, but instead mucks it up some more. For Harry, it all becomes quite clear.

Eternally Consistent by kitsunealyc (2016, E, 44k)

Draco Malfoy and Harry Potter assumed they would never be anything but civil enemies, until Potter lands on Malfoy's doorstep, bleeding, covered in curses, and acting very strangely indeed.

Turn from Stone by @harryromper (2019, M, 45k)

Harry knows there’s nothing he can do to stop Hermione (war hero, historian, author of the reissued “Hogwarts: A History”) once she sets her mind to something.

Transfigurations by Resonant (2003, E, 71k)

Five years after Voldemort's defeat, Harry returns to England to help re-open Hogwarts.

Timecode by Rasborealis (2019, M, 73k)

Harry Potter has been dead for two years, and Draco would laugh in the face of anyone claiming differently. Well, anyone but Hermione Granger.

Hermione Granger's Hogwarts Crammer for Delinquents on the Run by waspabi (2016, T, 93k)

'You're a wizard, Harry' is easier to hear from a half-giant when you're eleven, rather than from some kids on a tube platform when you're seventeen and late for work.

At Your Service by Faith Wood (2012, E, 95k)

Hogwarts students are in danger; Harry is determined to save them all. There's only one thing he knows for certain: Draco Malfoy is somehow involved.

Far From The Tree by aideomai (2020, E, 112k)

The arrival of Harry Potter’s children—snapped back in time, the children themselves guessed, twenty or so years—was the most interesting thing to happen at Hogwarts for years.

Eclipse by Mijan (2003, T, 287k)

Draco swore his revenge on Harry for Lucius's imprisonment, and Harry all but laughed at him. But Draco is planning more than schoolyard pranks this time.

Big shoutout to these two AUs for adapting the original material into the HP universe, so clever!

Burn the Curtains and the Wine by @nerdherderette (2019, E, 24k) - Mr. & Mrs. Smith AU

There are two versions of Harry Potter: the wizard who is the Ministry of Magic's most dangerous and successful assassin, and the husband who leads a staid life of domesticity with a reformed Death Eater. And never the twain shall meet.

Super Rich Kids by @thusspoketrish (2020, E, 81k) - Bling Ring AU

Draco Malfoy has become disillusioned by the glitz and glamour of the scandalous lives of the Post-Second Wizarding War Pureblood Elite. Enter: one existential crisis, one group of thieving cynical friends, and several terrible, terrible decisions.

[kusagrasskusa]

Gaara X Innocent! Reader - "Hellfire"

Gaara's age is bumped up to 16 in this btw, and the reader is 16 as well. This takes place the night Gaara kills that one Sound Ninja on the rooftop, during the chunin exams. Also, Gaara might be considered a Yandere, but I don't know (you'll see why lol) Lastly, when I talk about Gaara burning, I mean it metaphorically. Yes, this is 100% based off The Hunchback of Notre Dame

FYI! This story isn't very romantic so if you're a fan of slightly darker stories, go ahead snd read this I suppose. Plus Y/N is kinda a coward in this

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There he sat, on top of the rooftop late at night. Tomorrow would be the full moon, when Gaara's power would increase in perfect timing for another battle in the chunin exams. Competition is getting tough and examtakers are either extra aggressive with everyone or forming alliances. Not only that, but so many people are winning each challenge that too few people are being eliminated. That's all that's important and all that will be important until the Sand Village finally finishes off Konoha with the help of the Sound Village. But how, even with these much more important factors, is the only thing Gaara could think about is some normal pediatrician girl?

The moment he met her in the streets, a flame was set in his heart. He had been walking through Konoha after register for the exams and noticed a pretty young girl running through the streets, shouting for help. All she received was weird glances and eye rolls, however Gaara and his siblings caught on. Much to his sister and brother's surprise, Gaara had no problems hearing her pleas and then defending her. Someone had been following her; someone who her family had bad history with and from the looks of it, that person planned to hurt her.

He had no problems escorting her home and listening to her talk along the way. Her voice was so soft, her colorful kimono and flowers in her hair fitting for someone with an innocent and sweet personality. She seemed to be oblivious to the mysterious looks of Gaara and his siblings, or the way Gaara was so cold and silent. She payed no mind and spoke to him as id he was normal; like he was human. And it was that fact, her ignoring his dangerous aura, that lit that flame.

After since that day, that flame grew so strong. Every set of bright shades of the colors she wore on her clothes, every flower that she decorated herself with, every word or item that she mentioned in the little time she spoke to him, and everyone with E/C eyes would make him think of her. That sweet, kind, oblivious girl. It's like she cast a spell on him to make him slowly burn alive; that little flame she set it him would quickly grow into hellfire. His burning desires to see her again, to hold her, to love, traveled through his skin and veins. It didn't take long for Gaara to convince himself she did something cruel to him to use his demon, just like his father is using his demon to destroy Konoha in a few days.

Gaara was began to assume the girl was mocking him when she spoke to him so lightly; that he was no one to be afraid of. It was so insulting, but she was able to hide her cruel and disgraceful jeers under a sweet and loving facade and cute clothing. That has to be it, he thought. No one could ever like me, no one can love me, other than me. More and more of Gaara's thoughts were consumed, then all at once, by thoughts of her. She was like a demon dragging him to hell to torture forever. That beautiful girl with those lovely E/C eyes and pretty clothing was using him, he convinced himself. And someone like that deserved death.

That sweet, young girl had a name; Y/N. She was incapable of sleeping, as a terrible feeling in her stomach was keeping her awake. She pouted her lip and huffed, poking her stomach and whispering to herself, "I want that bad feeling to go away!" That feeling was pure anxiety and a hint of fear. These emotions were very uncommon for Y/N as she had always. Even a positive thinker with lots of love in her heart for even villains to an extent. She sighed, turning over in her bed on her back for sitting up, flipping her legs over her bedside. She stood up and put on a soft kimono over her pajamas and walked to the front door of her home, put on her sandels, and walked out. "Maybe a nice walk around the village will tire me out!"

"It's almost the full moon," Gaara said aloud. "My power will only grow stronger." He stood up, staring intensly at the moon as if it's the only thing keeping him from being devored by his hellish thoughts. His thoughts of how lovely it would be to destroy that girl who made his chest feel warm and his face heat up when she talked to him. That girl who made him feel the way he feels about himself, only a bit different. He had never felt romantic love to anyone, and for him to suddenly feel so strongly about someone instantly convinced him that she did something to him. Someone who would ever control him like would burn in hell before the hellfire consumes him first.

A rough, quiet and threatening voice erupted from behind the redhead. He paid no mind to anything that came out of the mouth of the Sound Village ninja rather just acknowledged that he wanted a fight. Without even realizing it, all that bloodlust built up through thinking of Y/N was released, ending in that Sound Village ninjas blood being spilled all over the roof top. It felt like a weight was taken off his back when he killed the ninja, but in the back of his head he knew it wasn't enough. Gaara didn't want that petty ninja, only that witch known as Y/N. Every passing second, that hellfire coursing through his veins were blazing out of control, weren't they?

"Maybe a nice walk around the village will tire me out!" Gaara's ears perked at that voice. That voice. Y/N's voice. Just like that, Gaara's need for blood grew strong again but this time, it felt different. He killed the Sound Village Ninja with aggression, but knowing he could kill Y/N now that he heard her close by made him feel an exciting kind of bloodlust. Those flames coursing through his body grew hotter every second, growing ever more desperate to get his hands on her.

"It's been a while since I've seen the garden at night come to think about. The moon is bright tonight so it's bound to be pretty sight!" That sweet, soft voice called out from the ground, below Gaara's feet. She walked the pathway it takes to find a nearby lake, where a nice little garden lays. A smile rose on Gaara's face; one of pure hate and excitement. His chest pained to greatly at the thought of her death, but that hellfire coursing through his body was telling him to hurt her. The front of his mind was screaming for him to kill her and use her blood as a piece of his deadly sand, but the back of his kind was whispering for him to comprehend how he feels about her first.

So he began to follow her. Gaara quietly walked from the rooftops, not daring to make a single sound. He continued to smile as he followed her, his smile growing the more he heard her talk to herself. Such a sweet girl with such a pure heart. It's a shame someone with Gaara's problems sees her as a witch because he loves her. As another 10 minutes go by, Y/N began walking into the woods and towards the lake. Gaara jumped to the ground without making a sound and followed her discreetly by hiding behind trees. He stopped when Y/N did. Y/N's eyes widened and sparkled at the amazing sight before her; the moon reflecting on the lake as beautiful flowers and trees accompanied toads on lilipads in the water. Pure bliss.

"Wow...It's incredible!" She laughed in awe. "My arms feel so weak at the sight," she spoke again as her smile widened. "I wish mom was here to see this!" Gaara hummed, looking over the scenery as well. It wasn't very interesting, but it was something he supposed. After all, Y/N loved it. Gaara looked around and saw no one nearby, meaning now would be a great time to react. He silently tip toed over to Y/N, using trees to cover himself. However, Y/N spotted him when she looked around the area in case there was anyone nearby (after all, she was being loud and who knows who lived in the area).

"Hmm? Hi, you there!" She said, waving her hand towards that silhouette behind that tree. Gaara'a face turned into one of the confusion, his "eyebrows" furrowing. Why isn't she scared of someone creeping up behind her in the woods? "Sorry if I'm bothering you! I just wanted to see what's it's like here at night. I can leave if you want," she said, swaying her body back and forth.

"...No, it's quite alright," Gaara replied as he stepped from behind the trees. He walked up the her, and instantly Y/N recognized him. She gasped, surprised.

"I remember you! You're the one that saved me! Thank you so much!" She giggled, clasping her hands together and bowing deeply. "My deepest thanks." Gaara paused, feeling his cheeks heat up a bit.

"My heart is pounding," he mumbled allowed, pressing his hand against his chest. "What have you done to me?" He asked, tilting his head to the side. Y/N stood up straight, giving him a questioning hum in return. Her face looked so innocent and sweet; it's all apart of that facade, isn't it? Gaara growled, roughly grabbing Y/N's shoulders and pulling her close. She jumped, gasping a little at the sudden action. "I said, what did you do to me? Where did this hellfire come from, you witch!" His voice went from his normal calm tone to a scream instantly.

Y/N's eyes widened and her body started to shiver a little. She furrowed her eyebrows together, stuttering out a reply. "I-I don't understand..." That answer wasn't good enough for Gaara as he had no problem throwing her to the ground and looming over her with a look of anger across his facial features. His fist was clenched so tight that his veins were showing. "I don't know what you're talking about!" Y/N yelled out fearfully, covering her face. Tears began to swell in her eyes and her voice became shakey.

Sand began to pour out from behind him and his heart ate picked up again. That flame in his heart was so strong and terrifying to Gaara that he was okay with killing the girl he fell in love with right then and now. His body was so scared that it wanted to kill her, but his heart was too scared to rid such a wonderful girl from the world forever. "Tell me, witch. What did... you do?" He asked again, staring at her so intensely that she could feel his eyes burning into her skin. She sniffed, now too scared to reply upon seeing that sand loom over her.

After a few moments, he screamed, "tell me!" Y/N chocked up on tears, taking a deep breath before replying.

"I don't know any magic or special jutsus, sir! I didn't do anything to you!" She cried out, slowly sitting up. "I'm sorry!" Gaara hissed, silent for a couple minutes. In that time, Gaara remained still as Y/N slowly began to stand up. In her mind, she was recalling words her mom once spoke to her about dangerous people. People are born innocent and harmless and only bad environments or situations can taint their purity. With that in mind, Y/N assumed that Gaara had problems that she couldn't understand. And with a heart as pure as her's, she had already forgave Gaara for scaring her and already felt sympathy for him. She slowly walked closer to him, the hairs on her neck standing up with anxiety, and put an arm on his shoulder.

That touch made him snatch back to reality. He slowly put his hand on top of her's; he was so confused and overwhelmed with opposing emotion and thought. "Then why? Why do you make me feel this way?" He asked in a low rough voice. Y/N began to wrap her arms around him and then hug him softly, shutting her eyes tightly. She managed to push her worried back as she found giving this sad, sad man affection was more important. Gaara felt his chest grow warm again and suddenly, she chuckled.

"I think your hellfire consumed me. I can't even find it in myself to kill you anymore, witch. I think I'm in love with you," he said, blinking away tears. He was so scared and his body pained to kill her, but he just couldn't. He was so overwhelmed with the pleasant feeling of Y/N arms being around him to ever lay a finger on her in anger. Instead he just hugged her back tightly, stuffing his face into the crook of her neck and sniffing. He was obviously holding back tears, which didn't work very well. Afterall, for the first time in forever, he felt like he could show a little bit of a soft side.

"You're gonna control me, aren't you? Use my feelings against me and bend me to your will? You're so cruel, even with the face of an angel." Y/N hummed, not understanding his comments. She just sighed, hugging him tighter and opening her eyes.

"Hey, Gaara, isn't it? Why don't we spend time out here tomorrow? I'd like to get to know you better."

Gaara grunted in response, closing his eyes and wiping his tears with on arm, keeping his other arm tightly around her smaller form. Yeah, whatever hellfire he feels has completely consumed him before he could stop it.

Lol sorry this written to bad!

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Skinny Love (Kakashi x Reader)

A/N: hello again. I'm in love with Kakashi this mans makes me heart go wild I swear. Hope you like seeing him on ur dash lol. Shy reader who is too afraid to confess how she feels to Kakashi. This is only part one and is essentially just fluff. The second part will be all angst and sadness so beware.

Ps. It took me so long to get this one done. I was struggling to find the right words.

Word count: 4000

"Come on, sensei. You like him," Sakura laughed, poking her superior in the arm. The group of women stood outside the training grounds after a day of hanging out and working on their jutsu. On occasion Y/N enjoyed taking the girls out and spending time with them. It was a relief to be away from all that testosterone. If only for a short time.

She just shook her head, smothering down the embarrassment she felt creeping up her neck. Her stomach churned whenever she recognized her feelings for the man. It was just so intense. "I would never feel that way about a coworker, you know that, Sakura."

"But he's not just a coworker to you, is he? He's also your close friend," Ino hummed.

"Perhaps, but haven't I taught you that it's bad to let emotions get in the way of work?"

The blond rolled her eyes, turning to fully face one of her sensei, who she would argue was deeply in denial. "Seriously why does it even matter? Kurenai-sensei and Asuma-sensei literally had a baby together. You should definitely tell Kakashi you like him."

Y/N tossed her head back against the wall, sighing. "Girls, I really don't like him. He's just my friend. He's nice to me and I appreciate that, but that doesn't mean I want to date him or anything." Her voice shook and clearly she had been caught.

She was always so bad at lying.

"Whatever you say, Y/N."

"It's just something I'd rather not dwell on, Sakura. I'm sorry for being so private about it, but it's a sensitive subject for me," the woman confessed, rubbing the back of her neck awkwardly.

"It's okay! You don't have to apologize. We get it! Feelings can definitely be complicated."

"I-I," she started, about to explain herself, but instead she rethought what she was about to say. There was no reason to actually reveal how she felt about the man. These times were tough, and there wasn't any room for making things even more messy with relationship drama. Y/N was more than happy just pretending they were friends and nothing more. As long as she had him just to talk to, she would be fine. As long as he always made it back alive, there was no reason to complain.

"You're right. Feelings are too complicated," she muttered, feeling herself practically deflate as she did so. Y/N was beginning to think she was just the one making everything complicated when it didn't have to be. Skipping around and lying about her feelings. Kakashi wouldn't ditch her if she just said something, she was sure of it.

Just as Sakura was about to reply, the voice of the man in question chimed in from down the path, "Y/N, we were looking for you."

"Yes, the third wheel to our tricycle of youth!"

Y/N felt a smile grow on her lips at the sounds of those voices, especially Gai's exclamation of youth. He was awfully weird, she thought, but that was what kept him so interesting. She turned to face the men walking in her direction. "Kakashi, Gai! What's up? The girls and I were just finishing our training."

"We're going out for drinks and thought you might like to join."

"Sounds great. It's been a long time since the three of us went out. For some reason we never have off at the same time anymore."

"Yeah, it's a shame. Missions have taken over our lives lately," Kakashi said tiredly. It was true. They really never had a second to rest. It was beginning to take its toll. Those were the consequences of war though. "How have you been?"

"Good, I, um..." she began, her eyes trailing up to Kakashi's. He watched back intently, patiently, and she felt something in her chest flutter up. He was always so handsome, she wondered how she could go so long without seeing his face. She just wanted to leap forward and give him a hug, wrap herself up in his warm arms for just a little while. That wasn't an option though, so she settled on some simple words. "I've missed you."

His eyes softened barely enough to be noticeable but she saw. Her heart continued to flutter up in her chest and she sighed, clutching her hands tighter behind her back. No doubt the girls standing just behind her were hyper-analyzing all their interactions, especially after revealing they held an interest in the pair's relationship.

He didn't have the chance to reply though, as Gai was the one to chime in. "Why thank you. I have to say, I've missed you as well, my kunoichi friend."

"Thanks, Gai." Even if the statement wasn't exactly pointed toward him, she was happy she had been missed.

"No problem! Now I hope you young ladies don't mind if we take L/N off your hands."

"No no. It's not a problem, Gai-sensei. I'm sure our moms want us home for dinner anyway. It's getting late after all."

"Yeah, we'll see you later, Y/N-sensei." The pink haired girl waved ss they started to make their way in the opposite direction toward town. Ino paused for a moment though.

"Don't forget what we talked about. You really shouldn't be so shy; it's gonna be okay," she said softly. Y/N sighed, nodding her head as if to say fine. In reality, she wouldn't do anything different. She wasn't feeling very open to changing herself or facing any of her fears. "See you around."

It was kinda sad that Y/N found comfort and support in a bunch of 15 year olds. She was an adult, couldn't she talk to other adults about her problems. These girls were just so accepting and she didn't feel awkward talking about immature things like crushes. Any other adult would just be too wrapped up in their own lives to care too much anyway.

"What was that about?"

"Nothing, Kakashi. We were just talking about random stuff. You know how curious they can be."

"You go out there and fight rogue shinobi every week. How could you be shy?" The green beast asked.

"It's really nothing. They're always assuming things about me. I'm reserved, but I wouldn't say I'm shy, per se…" She stopped to think for a quick second, tapping her foot on the ground. "Actually, I would say I'm just more conscious of the things I say and do than most other people. Not a bad thing at all."

Kakashi nodded. "It's good to keep a level head."

"Exactly. I'm Level headed. Thanks, Kakashi."

"Now let's head off to the bar! Sake for everyone!" Gai cheered, throwing his fist up in the air. She nodded, walking up beside the pair as they started off toward the restaurant of their choice, which she hoped was her favorite one with the tastiest fruit juice drinks. She was willing to put out good money to have one good, tispy night of drinks and snacking. It had already been weeks since she had a night off, one time wouldn't break the bank.

She stood to the right of them, just beside Kakashi. Every now and then she found herself drifting just a bit too close to him, her natural gait leaning toward the left. At one point, she found her hand skim dangerously close to his and she snatched it away to keep herself in check. Holding his hand perhaps was a dream of hers but she wasn't going to actually try anything.

It wasn't that she was afraid of Kakashi. Quite the opposite actually. She cared for him so deeply it sometimes made her stomach churn when she thought about it. He was her friend for ages, ever since she could really remember. He was one of the only people she could sit with and feel completely enveloped in a warm comfort, free of judgement and deceit. Gai as well, but Kakashi was different.

Maybe he could be a bit of pervert, and even sarcastic at times, but he was never rude. He had changed over the years from being a know-it-all, little jerk to someone everyone liked and admired, a kind and brave soul.

Unfortunately, it took bouts of death and loss to come about this change, but she wasn't going to ignore it. He was the best man she knew, and it only seemed natural she fell in love with him. He would probably never feel the same way. He had better things to worry about and other women to long for. He didn't have his entire life to wait around for a shy woman like herself. That was okay.

As long as he was alive and well, she would be happy.

Maybe one day she would gather the courage to grab his hand, to run her thumb over his knuckles and feel the callouses against her skin. Maybe one day she would have the courage to confess how she felt. Not now, but one day when she was comfortable.

"You okay?" He asked, pulling her out of her deepening thoughts. "You're walking really slow and uh, your hand…" The man motioned to where she was clutching her wrist against her chest.

"Yes, I'm fine. Just uh, my wrist is sore from training." She worked her hand in a circle, pretending to stretch it out. He rolled his visible eye, knowingly.

"Sure. Always skipping around the real issues."

"I'm really okay. I was just thinking hard about something."

"Anything to do with what you, Sakura, and Ino were talking about?" he suggested, raising a brow.

She groaned. He always knew what she was thinking. It was definitely one of his best and worst qualities depending on the situation. In this case, she felt awkward as she was so lost in thought about him. She felt like a fool. "Maybe it was. But that was girl time and now it's drinking time. Different topics of discussion."

"Well, mind telling me what's got you so caught up? It's gotta be important."

"It's personal."

"Ah, I see. Well, that's fine. When you want to talk about it, I'm always around."

There was silence for a moment, her thoughts running wild in her head. He was so kind, it wouldn't be bad to tell him how she felt. He would let her down easy, surely. And Gai would be there to cushion her embarrassment, no doubt. He would make things less awkward somehow. She was sure of it.

It was crazy. No way she would say anything. Definitely not.

"I'm interested in someone," Y/N found herself blurting out before she could stop herself. She just felt so much pressure building up in her chest and the only way she could relieve that feeling was to tell him something, anything about the predicament she was in. She wouldn't tell him exactly how she felt and about who, but she could vent.

Damn, all this and she didn't even have her first drink. That man really did something to her.

The men stopped in their path, their heads turning their attention solely to her. She felt her neck and cheeks begin to heat up and her palms start to sweat. Why would she say that? Dammit. She really was a fool.

"Really? Who?" Gai asked. "He'd be a fool to reject you, of course, beautiful flower of the leaf! You do not have to worry!"

"Gai...it's really not that simple. He is, um, out of my league, I guess you could say," she muttered nervously, rubbing her palms together to ease her anxiety. "He's just well, I don't know, the perfect guy ever."

She could feel Kakashi tense at her side, and her eyes scanned over him. He didn't look out of the ordinary but his energy had definitely changed. Strange.

"No one is out of your league, don't you dare say something like that! If he doesn't let you down easy, I will use my fists of justice to defend you! Tell me who this mystery man is."

"This is what Ino meant when she said you were being shy. You aren't going to tell him, are you?" Kakashi asked, and she noticed the bit of annoyance in his tone. She wondered if he was just upset she was talking about such silly things when they were ready to start drinking. She felt embarrassed. They were adults. Adults don't talk about this kind of thing. He doesn't want to hear about the guys she's interested in, or how she feels about them. Maybe Gai would be interested in it, but not a cool guy like Kakashi.

"Of course not. Like I said, he would just reject me anyway, there's no point," she told them. "And Gai, I can't just tell you who it is. You know you're a loud mouth; you'd go around telling everyone." She really didn't believe Gai would do that to her. He was far too conscious of others feelings for the most part. She just couldn't risk Kakashi knowing. She would keep it a secret from him.

"Oh come on! Just tell us! I'll help you out, be your wingman!"

"Maybe I'll tell you another time. When I'm more confident in myself."

"Well, what is it that has finally caught out dear friends heart in a web of love? Tell us!" Oh man. He really was nosy sometimes. He meant well, but occasionally he just didn't know when to stop. Kakashi kept his mouth shut because he understood she was getting uncomfortable, that or he was growing annoyed as she suspected.

Regardless, it was nice to get some of this off her chest, even if it was risky business.

"I don't really know. He's smart and considerate, and very brave. He's handsome as well, that's a plus," she smiled, listing off the things she liked about the man standing right in front of her. It felt so exhilarating, talking about her feeling so openly. It was terrifying and relieving at the same time. Y/N exhaled as she thought about him again, "He just makes me feel happy when I'm in my worst moments, that's all. I mean, what else could I ask for?"

"I see! He sounds like a good guy. Can't wait to meet him," he laughed until his eyes widened and he leaned in a bit closer to her face. He pointed his finger at his chest and questioned, "Unless of course, I already know him. It's not me, is it?

She found herself smiling just a little, her lips curving up at the absurdity of it all. "No definitely not. You don't have to worry about that."

"I'm wounded, but I understand. My youthfulness is just too strong for you."

As she thought of something to say, she began to question just why Kakashi hadn't said anything really at all. It was strange of him, letting the other man do all the talking when normally he asked her questions and at least tried to engage. Maybe he was feeling tired or bored with the conversation. She had to change the subject.

"So uh, let's get a move on before all the good booths are taken, yeah?"

"Actually, I'm getting tired. I think I'll just head home for the night, get ready for my mission in two days," the white haired jounin sighed. They both looked over to him, surprised, but Y/N knew why he needed to go. She had upset him somehow. So much for a fun night between the three of them.

"Kakashi, come on! Don't bail on us now!"

She took a step back and her eyes trailed up to his, which were narrowed, not angrily just as if he had been hurt or confused she couldn't tell which. "Oh, are you sure?" Her heart was sinking in her chest seeing him so conflicted.

"Yeah. Got a headache, too."

"Ah, okay. Well, I'll see you around sometime?"

"Yeah."

"Goodbye, rival. Hopefully you are feeling better tomorrow and we can have a real night of drinking indeed!"

And with that, he left to his apartment, leaving the other two behind. She felt her stomach begin to turn uncomfortably, sick from the thought of Kakashi just leaving them like that. He seemed so angry, she couldn't help but think it was all her fault. It wasn't in his nature to act that way.

They had already spent so much time apart already that it was tugging at her heart strings. She felt like they rarely saw each other anymore. For him to be angry at her and leave, that meant they would just see each other even less than before. It seemed like a nightmare come true. She really did miss him, like she had said. She missed the fun they would have together and the conversations they shared. She just missed him and there he went, gone off again without so much as a real goodbye.

The woman clutched at her stomach, feeling the tossing and turning overtake her sense with nausea.

Suddenly, before she could contain herself, tears began dripping down her cheeks, and she sucked in her breath. Hot tears warmed her cheeks, and frantically she wiped them away from her cheeks. Her arms wound around her waist and she hugged herself tightly inward, almost as if she would turn into a ball if she could.

"Y/N, what's wrong?! What happened?"

"It's Kakashi," she whispered, trying to keep herself from crying anymore but it only got worse.

"Kakashi? Because he left? It's okay, we can go drinking another night or-or you and I can just go alone. No problems," he tried to say but it wasn't going to work. She didn't want to go to dinner with Gai and she didn't want to wait until tomorrow, or whatever the next time they would all be together. She was being stupid and selfish, acting like a spoiled little baby with all this crying. She just couldn't stop herself.

"It's not that. There's something I haven't told anyone. I don't know what to do."

"It's gonna be fine whatever it is. Just calm down."

"No, I can't. It's so bad, Gai. I'm in love with him, it's him, and now he's mad at me and I don't know what I did wrong," she confessed, feeling all the words slipping out so easily. How is it that such strong emotions could just cause her to think so irrationally and just let something like this happen? A bout of confessing every feeling she had to her friend who may or may not go and relay all this information to Kakashi. It was stupid. She was just being stupid and reckless.

He nodded carefully, moving to take ahold of her shoulders to steady her. "It's gonna be okay. He's not mad at you, I promise. I know Kakashi and I'm sure he really was just feeling sick."

"Gai, I just...I don't want him to ever leave me, even over something stupid like this."

"Trust me, you don't have to worry about Kakashi leaving you. He would never do something like that. You are one of his closest friends. There's almost nothing you could do to make him do that, especially if you always have good intent at heart. Trust me, you really don't ever need to worry," Gai explained trying his best to reason with her. "You two do everything together. He never stops talking about you! He would never let you go."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes, I am one hundred percent sure!"

"I-I need to go find him. I need to make sure he's not upset with me," she said as she pushed herself away from him. He waved to her as she started in the direction of Kakashi's apartment.

"Goodluck on your mission, Y/N, not that you'll need it."

______

Kakashi was just about to enter his apartment when she dashed up the stairs and turned the corner, going so fast she nearly slid into the wall. His eyes widened when he saw her, and he froze in his spot, not turning the key to the door just yet. Her face was flush and chest heaved. He could tell she rushed on her way.

"Y/N, did you run all the way here?"

She stood, catching her breath after just having run all the way across town to find him. Her heart raced as she looked up at him, and she clutched at the railing of the stairs for support. "I wanted to say sorry for whatever I said to make you angry with me. I didn't know I was being insensitive."

"I told you I was sick," he replied, but she knew better. And he knew she did. He wasn't dumb. They knew each other better than that and there was no pretending.

"I could tell that was a lie. I know you were angry and I felt terrible."

"Were you just crying?"

She exclaimed back, holding a hand over her heart to maybe try and ease the racing heartbeat, "Maybe. What about it?! I was hurt that I'd offended my friend, isn't that tear-worthy?" She took a few more deep breaths through her mouth, letting the air fill her up and calm her down. "Why were you so upset?"

"It's not important."

"No, no. It's important to me!"

The man paused, thinking over his next words carefully. He very well knew the real reason he ran away from their conversation like a coward. He actually thought it was obvious. It wouldn't hurt for her to know. He sighed, "If you really want to know. It's because I was tired of hearing about your love life. It's not exactly an entertaining subject."

She knew it but admittedly she would be lying if she said she didn't feel her heart break a little at those words. He didn't care about her feelings enough to just sit there and listen to her talk for a couple minutes? Was she that annoying? So many thoughts ran through her head, and each one made her sad. "I just didn't want to go a whole night with Gai talking about it," he added. "It's nothing to do with you."

"I'm sorry. I really shouldn't have brought it up."

"It's fine," he brushed off her apology. "I'm the one who asked about it in the first place."

"Why- why wouldn't you want to hear me talk about other men? Why would that be a sore subject for you?" She asked, her curiosity spiking up through the roof. It was strange, the whole situation. He had never backed down from a personal chat before, only this time.

He felt like a deer caught in the headlights suddenly. How was he supposed to reply to that without blowing his cover. "I just don't like the whole romance thing."

But they both knew that was a lie. He read romance for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. But if he wanted to keep his secrets, she would let him. There was no need to pry. She just hoped he would trust her enough in the future to explain what he meant. Secretly, she wished that it was because he was jealous. That he didn't want to hear about another man because he wanted to be that guy, her lover. It was a wild thought, a hopeless theory meant to be thrown out, but she could fantasize.

"Kakashi, we're still good? As friends and all? You'll go out with me and Gai another time then?"

He nodded, his lips quirking up into just a tiny smile. It was characteristic for her mind to go straight to the worst case scenario. He replied, "Of course. Like I said, it's not that bad. Don't worry about it."

"Okay. I'm glad. I really thought I messed up this time."

"I don't think there's anything you could do to make me hate you," he sighed, leaning his shoulder against his door frame. "The day I let you go is the day I die, Y/N."

She smiled, closing her eyes and finally taking a relaxed breath. It was done. He wasn't angry at all. He still cared for her and everything else she could hope for. As long as they could remain friends, it was all gonna be okay. She laughed, "That's what Gai said. Should have listened to him, huh?"

The both nodded and suddenly they were enveloped in a peaceful silence for a while. She stared down at her feet and he watched her quietly, admiring the way she could be so miserably shy yet so adorable at the same time.

"Do you wanna go catch dinner? Or uh, just drinks like we originally planned, if you want," he asked, running his hand through his hair. Her eyes brightened at the question, and he'd be stupid not to notice the new shine in them.

"Do you want to go find Gai first?"

"Actually, how about it just be you and me this time? We'll catch Gai tomorrow morning for breakfast instead."

"Two meals in two days...I'm not made of money."

"It's on me. Don't worry about it."

"Oh, jeez. So nice of you, Kakashi. Thank you! Where are we going?" she asked happily, walking up to him and rolling back in the balls of her feet.

"Wherever you want to go."

"I feel like I'm getting the special treatment. I'm so excited," she cheered, pulling him in the direction of the stairs by the edge of his sleeve.

He just smiled. It was all he could do. He had the most beautiful woman in the entire world in front of him ready to go on a not-exactly date. They were only friends, and she reaffirmed that today when she mentioned she was interested in someone else.

But for now he could pretend they were a thing. That they were dating and that she loved him and he could openly love her back. He would take her out to dinner and kick at her ankles under the table just to annoy her. And he would take a sip of her drink and pretend it was too sweet for him and watch as she struggled to drink a sip of his liquor.

And after he walks her home that night, he would hug her tight to his chest and he would think about kissing her, to pull down his mask for just a split second and press his lips to hers, but he would refrain. It just wasn't the right time. Maybe there would never be a right time either, and that was okay.

As long as they could have nights like these, as long as he would feel her in his arms, he was more than happy. He was in love.

Part Two is up.

[siswritesyanderes]

If it had been Jasper-Sadie or Alice-Sadie as the vampires and finding their third later, how if at all would any of the “prior” story (the Twilght saga proper) have changed?

This turns the timeline inside out, but Meyer was never great at those anyway.

(Hi, if you're from the Twilight fandom stumbling across this post without context, Sadie is my OC in a yandere Alice/yandere Jasper/OC fic that you can read here.)

Ohhh, so much potential there! I can't answer that in full, because doing so would spoil what Sadie's potential vampire ability is. (Super sorry about that. Feel free to ask again after that information has come up in Rule One!)

I can say that both Bella and Edward would take to confiding in her and seeking her counsel with regards to their relationship. Especially if it's a Sadie-Alice duo; Edward would be super close with both Sadie and Alice (like he's close with Alice in canon), and while he sometimes gets frustrated with Alice, he pretty much always respects Sadie. It's like, Alice would be Bella's best friend and Edward's partner in crime (since she's still the one who would agree to kidnap Bella, whereas Sadie would never), and Sadie would be Bella's confidante and Edward's moral compass. Both Bella and Edward would go to Sadie for advice about each other, and Sadie, though startled by their neediness, would always have something valuable to say.

(Picture Bella or Edward bursting into Sadie's room with a question, and Sadie, wide-eyed, putting down whatever she's doing and saying, "Alrighty then, have a seat.)

Edward trusts that Sadie wouldn't lie to him, so the urgency in having Bella run to him in Italy before he sparkles in front of people (lest he read Alice's thoughts and assume she's lying to him) wouldn't be a thing; Sadie just runs Bella to Edward with vampire speed and is subjected to that whole reunion as an awkward third wheel while Alice parks the stolen car.

Also, Sadie would tip every fight slightly more in favor of the Cullens, but she would also have a habit of really wanting to talk to the enemies instead of attacking them. This is good/useful with the Volturi but not so good/useful with Victoria and Riley.

Oh! Also, Sadie would realize that Victoria will probably follow Edward's scent, in Eclipse, and Sadie would accompany him and Bella in sitting the battle out, so that they have more backup against Victoria. Jasper and Alice wouldn't be privy to the fact that Victoria is coming; this is just a realization that Sadie has that Edward hears in her mind. (As far as Jasper and Alice are concerned, Sadie is sitting the battle out just to be safe, and they're happy that she won't be in harm's way.) This is where Sadie's need to talk to enemies would become a problem, because both Victoria and Riley are too far gone to listen to reason, but Sadie really believes in them and wants to convince them they don't have to die today. It still turns out fine, though. Sadie gets a little hurt, but she's fine. Alice and Jasper would be absolutely smothering, after. Victoria is lucky she's already dead, because they would make her suffer.

And Sadie would think to explain things to Irina before Alice realizes that Irina is going to the Volturi, so that whole misunderstanding never happens.

All of that being said, the thought of "Yandere Alice meets Sadie first" and "Yandere Jasper meets Sadie first" got really interesting to me. So I have to talk about those scenarios immediately.

I'm going to place Sadie sometime in the twentieth century in both cases, and I'm going to try to let the time period matter as little as possible, but feel free to imagine them in 50s or 60s attire, lol. (Or 70s or 80s; again, it doesn't matter that much; I'm just placing her in the twentieth century to keep the rough order of events the same, kind of.) I'm approaching this with the assumption that Alice and Jasper still become vampires in the same way/at the same time as they do in canon; they just meet at different times. I'm not dealing with the Confederate thing here, though, because I'll be dealing with it in Rule One.

I'm gonna go ahead and put it all under the cut. (And if your experience of Rule One is more invested in the potential for wholesome romance than the yandere aspect, maybe the rest of this isn't for you, because this is definitely more yandere-leaning, lol.)

Alice-Sadie

Alice knows three things: 1. Her own name. 2. That she is going to join the Cullens. 3. That Sadie, whom she has not yet met, is her soulmate.

Though she slips up every now and then, Alice does her best not to eat humans. She wants to fit in with the Cullens by the time she finds them, so she's accustoming herself to the animal diet. Anyway, she has a mate out there whom she will meet as a human, and she has to get herself under control before she can risk being around her.

The thing is, Alice knows about Sadie before Sadie is actually an option, so she has to kill time so that she doesn't meet Sadie too early. And Alice hates waiting, so she goes ahead and introduces herself to the Cullens before Sadie. She tells them all about how she'll have a soulmate soon, and how it's killing her to keep her distance but she knows things will be way better if she never meets Sadie as a child. She decorates her room with things that Sadie likes, anticipating that one day she'll be sharing the room with Sadie. Honestly, if it weren't for Edward's mind reading, the rest of the Cullens might think Sadie was an imaginary friend or something.

(Rosalie would normally take issue with Alice's plans to intrude on the life of a human she's never met just because of a potential future where they're in love, but she doesn't really take Alice's fantasizing seriously until it's too late.)

One day, Alice just sort of disappears from the Cullen house, and only Edward knows where she's gone.

Sadie is finally at the right age; it's time.

Alice appears in Sadie's life, and everything she says and does is perfect. She rockets from stranger to friend to best friend at an impressive rate, her precognition easily compensating for Sadie's hesitancy (and Sadie would start off more wary than she is in Rule One, due to the time period). Having left the rest of the Cullens, for the time being, there is nothing (read: no one) holding Alice back from being absolutely surgical about making herself important in Sadie's life and subtly isolating her. She gives expensive gifts, and comprehensive compliments, and she always knows what to say to make Sadie like and trust her more.

When Sadie starts to become suspicious about the evolution of their friendship, Alice drops the vampire bomb and the soulmate bomb all at once, showing Sadie her speed and strength and sparkles. There was no better way to do it. Alice checked; this was the absolute best set of circumstances for the reveal.

Sadie asks for time to process the information. She asks for space. Alice graciously allows it; she's practically living with Sadie at this point, anyway. (Not that Sadie knows it. But yeah, she's in Sadie's house pretty much 24/7 (minus her hunting trips), dodging notice with stealth and psychic powers.)

When Sadie is ready to talk again, Alice pours out every reassurance: how she will never stop loving her; how she would never hurt her; how she thinks about her all the time and loves her so much. Sadie isn't fully won over by the whole vampire lover concept, but Alice does convince her to come meet her family.

They go to the Cullen house. Alice shows her off to everyone, and Rosalie is stunned, and Emmett laughs incredulously. Edward and Carlisle make polite introductions, and Esme hugs her, just glad to see Alice so happy. (Esme has been so worried about her newest daughter, so flighty and constantly pining for someone who wasn't there. And then she disappeared, and anything could have happened to her! But now she's back, and she's brought someone lovely, and she looks happier than Esme has ever seen her.) Carlisle and Edward give Sadie a more in-depth explanation of how vampires operate and why the bond between mates is a big deal. Esme cooks her a huge meal. Before they know it, nighttime has come, and Sadie falls asleep in Alice's room.

She wasn't drugged or anything; Alice just perfectly orchestrated a set of circumstances in which she would be tired by this exact time.

When she wakes up, Alice is an utter angel, offering her breakfast and a bath and telling her that there's more to see, around the house. She hasn't seen Rosalie's garage, yet! She hasn't seen Esme's garden. And soon enough she's sleeping over again.

On that third day at the house, Rosalie pulls Sadie aside to say that she'll drive Sadie home, if Sadie needs her to. But Alice has done her job well; Sadie likes Alice, and she likes the Cullens, and most of all, she's so curious about vampires and the world thereof. She's willing to stay and learn, provided she can visit her friends and family, and provided Alice doesn't try to change her. She fills several journals with what she learns about vampires, all in the span of a single year. She learns so much, and she's never satisfied that she's learned enough.

When Alice asks her to let Carlisle change her, she chooses exactly the right conversation, exactly the right approach, and exactly the right time. Sadie agrees and becomes a vampire. (She kind of has to, for this prompt, lol.) Rosalie is annoyed, but she knows that Sadie thought the matter over thoroughly.

When the day comes that Alice sees Jasper in their future, she drags Sadie off to meet him, barely explaining herself beyond "We have another mate!". Sadie goes along with it because she's used to Alice's antics.

They meet this crimson-eyed, roguishly handsome vampire, and Jasper is pretty instantly enthralled with them both. He's curious about their golden eyes, charmed by Alice's forwardness, and amused by Sadie's mix of intrigue and wariness. The emotional flavor of Alice's joy and cheerfulness, and of Sadie's curiosity and uncertainty, are enough to pretty much have him wrapped around their fingers right away.

Sadie's reaction is more "Ohhhh, Alice, this guy eats people..."

Alice just goes, "It's okay. Jasper will be willing to change his diet if we ask him to. Won't you, Jasper?"

And it's so presumptuous, but also he's into it, because Sadie has already made it clear that eating humans is a deal-breaker for her, and he doesn't want this meeting to end.

He joins the family, and it feels like the best thing ever; he has two amazing soulmates, and he belongs to a large coven that will always be safe from strangers. The animal-eating thing is a downside, but there's no help for that.

The dynamic for the next little while is that Alice is already in love with both Jasper and Sadie, Jasper is already in love with Alice and Sadie, and Sadie is in love with Alice and polite to Jasper but isn't quite sure about him. Like, she's in a peculiar place of "We are soulmates, and I do like you and feel an attraction to you, and I understand how our personalities are good together, but I don't know how long it'll take me to become comfortable with your past", and Jasper is just falling over himself to earn her approval, but she's comfortable with allowing it to take time.

(Rosalie is secretly very entertained by the whole thing, and Emmett is not-so-secretly entertained.)

Unlike in canon, Jasper would never suggest eating any human ever again; even once Sadie is comfortable with him, he never wants to risk making her doubt him the way she did in the beginning.

Jasper-Sadie

So at this point in his life, Jasper is eating people. His eyes are bright red, and he is ruthless, and Alice isn't around to temper that side of him.

This is absolutely a kidnapping situation.

When he runs into Sadie (entirely by happenstance), he doesn't know immediately that he is in love with her; he just knows that he wants to follow her, so he does. He stalks after her like he has stalked lots of prey in the past. Her blood doesn't sing to him, though; after several hours of just tailing her, he realizes that he just likes to hear her breathe and speak and laugh. He likes to look at her. He likes to taste her emotions on the air. He likes this human.

Then he realizes that he's in love with her, as much as Peter is in love with Charlotte.

He never wants to stop looking at her, listening to her talk...

He manages to get her alone, and he introduces himself in a charismatic, gentlemanly fashion. He kisses the back of her hand (managing to ignore the feel and sound of her pulse so close; he shouldn't take a risk like that again) and says, "Good afternoon, ma'am. My name is Jasper Whitlock. May I ask what your name is?"

She notices the coldness of his skin and the redness of his eyes (and again, time-period-wise, this interaction is very weird), but he is sending her the most powerful waves of comfort and calm that he can. She is dazed and perplexed, but not afraid, as she answers, "I'm Sadie Gilder."

It's the most beautiful name he has ever heard.

He abducts her pretty much then and there; he leads her away with a request that she accompany him and a heavy layer of mood control. Sadie is able to break out of the daze (through sheer overthinking) after they've walked together awhile; by the time she asks, "Wait, where are we?", they've reached the secluded mansion of an old widow.

(Jasper doesn't need a place to sleep, but his Sadie does, so he quickly identified this place as the best option.)

The order in which Jasper eats the occupants of the house and brings Sadie inside the house is up to your imagination, as is whether or not Sadie ends up seeing any bodies or seeing him with blood on his face and clothes. Either way, just the kidnapping itself is enough to have Sadie panicking, and he hates to feel her fear.

He holds her, gives her calming energy, and whispers to her. "Don't be scared. I won't hurt you, Perfect Sadie. I won't eat you. You're too special. Just gonna keep you right here." (He's just eaten a lot of people, so he's okay with breathing right next to her, so that he can keep whispering to her.) She falls asleep in his arms. He doesn't stop holding her, and he doesn't stop whispering. (Also, remember how the first thing he says to Sadie in Rule One is that she's warm and soft? Yeah, he still says that, pretty much verbatim, in this scenario. I'm not putting it in quotes, because it sounds dirty in a kidnapping context, but he for sure says it.)

The next day, since he's keeping up the comforting vibes to keep her from being afraid, Sadie asks Jasper a lot of questions. He tells her everything he knows about vampires. He isn't fully versed in vampire mating, so he isn't able to really inform her that his obsession with her is, to some degree, an inherent vampire trait, but he is very good at conveying to her that he is obsessed.

With no one to tell him to cool it with his power, and with his diet of human blood making his power more potent than it would be on animal blood, Jasper uses it at pretty much full capacity every time, instead of subtle shifts in emotion. So, while Sadie does notice that it's happening, she can't keep herself from the effects of his power by self-awareness alone.

He generally doses her with the same kind of peaceful calm he uses when he meets strange vampires for the first time, instead of the lethargic calm he uses to keep prey docile. He uses the latter when he wants her to sleep, but for the most part he just wants her to be unfearful and communicative.

She eats the food that's in the house. When he's able to convince himself to leave her unattended (usually after he's put her to sleep), he picks up more groceries and abducts some humans for himself. He keeps them in the cellar, far enough away from Sadie that she needn't know they're there but close enough that he can still hear her when he goes down to eat them. It's actually very convenient, not to have to hunt often; he just has to pop down to the cellar and enjoy a few of the already-injured occupants. Having a steady home has its upside. It's a shame someone will eventually notice the widow missing and he'll have to move with Sadie. But there will always be another empty mansion, or a mansion that can be easily made empty.

(When it's time to change homes, Jasper carries Sadie to the new destination while she's sleeping.)

Partially due to the mood control and partially due to the upfront-ness of everything, there's honestly very little tension between them. There's fear, sometimes (The one time Sadie tries to leave the mansion while Jasper is eating, he runs up from the cellar to stop her, and he's still covered in blood, and she's terrified, and it takes him a lot of soothing to get her calm again. It upsets him when she's scared.), but no tension. Sadie would like to leave, but she gathers that she can't, so all there is to do is maneuver within the new situation and learn more about her captor.

And neither of them is inherently a romantic. Jasper loves her, but even he isn't under the impression that they're dating or something. As far as he's concerned, he's keeping her; as far as she's concerned, she's studying him. Jasper is ecstatic with the arrangement, and Sadie is as comfortable as the situation allows.

Peter and Charlotte follow Jasper's scent at some point, wanting to hang out, and Jasper socializes with them outside the mansion, explaining that they can't go in because there's a human inside whom he is invested in keeping alive, and he can't risk them eating her. When they learn that he's in love, they ask if he plans on changing her, but he says that he can't yet. His control isn't good enough.

One day, Alice shows up.

She meets Jasper while he's in town, gathering food for Sadie and himself. They still have the little "You kept me waiting" "My apologies" flirtation, but he's a little more guarded, because he has to get back to Sadie, and as much as he is already beguiled by this weird-eyed stranger, he doesn't want her following him home. She's a vampire, and no vampires are allowed near his Sadie.

Alice really wants to skip the wooing; she's already seen herself with Jasper and Sadie. But she knows that mentioning Sadie too soon could make Jasper defensive, so she has to sprinkle herself slowly into Jasper's life, meeting him when he comes to town and letting his instinctive attraction and fondness for her grow into trust over a span of months (even moving towns when he does). She doesn't say anything about him switching to an animal diet, either; she tells him that she eats animals, but trying to influence him at this stage could alter her chances of seeing Sadie. Better to just let him murder.

Once they're at the right place, trust-wise, she tells him that she is already as in love with Sadie as she is with him, due to her psychic visions, and she asks to meet her. At first, Jasper isn't ready, but after she's asked a few more times, he allows it.

Alice has to be extra careful, because she wants to just run and hug Sadie as soon as she sees her, but if she makes a sudden move, Jasper will react badly. (Especially since the speed that comes with her small frame makes her a genuine threat to Sadie, even with Jasper there.) Not to mention, she has to endear herself to Sadie, whose only experience with vampires has been abduction.

"Sadie Lily Gilder," Alice says, barely restraining her excitement. "I am Alice Cullen. I'm your other soulmate."

Sadie is mostly perplexed and a little exasperated, but Jasper feels suddenly as if the sun has broken through the clouds. (Which means a lot, since he was already happy before.) Alice's joy at finally getting to see Sadie seems to fill the room, and this is his first time hearing Sadie's middle name, and...

"I like seeing you together," he realizes.

For the next few months, Alice is allowed to visit Sadie every now and then, under full supervision from Jasper. He can feel that she loves Sadie as much as he does, but he's still got to be careful. Humans are so fragile, and he's used to only trusting himself. When she comes, Alice brings Sadie little gifts that she never thought to ask Jasper before. She brings a new spritely energy to the house that Sadie comes to enjoy.

The following few months, (and after Jasper has watched her hunt animals) she's allowed to stay over full-time. They watch Sadie sleep, together. She's able to answer more of Sadie's questions.

Alice introduces Jasper to the idea of joining a family she's seen in their future. He doesn't want that many vampires around their Sadie, but as always, Alice says just the right things: they're all animal eaters; she hasn't seen a single future where any of them hurt Sadie; and the eldest of them could change Sadie for them.

(She also has to convince Sadie to want to become immortal with them, since she knows that Carlisle and Edward would be against turning her against her will. It helps that Sadie has been captured by a vampire for a while, now, and being a vampire herself would give her a chance of exerting some control over her future.)

When they meet the Cullens, Alice acts like they're already best friends. Jasper is more formal in asking the patriarch if he can change Sadie for them.

Edward calls them out on kidnapping Sadie, but Sadie points out that, unless things come to blows between the Cullens and Alice and Jasper, the only way for her to no longer be kidnapped is by becoming a vampire.

So Carlisle changes her, and she stays with the Cullens so that she can have someone to help her overcome her thirst during her newborn years without slipping up and hurting someone. Alice and Jasper stay with the Cullens, too (and the Cullens tell Jasper that he has to switch to the animal diet if he wants to stay). Eventually, all three of them are close enough to various members of the Cullen family that they just sort of become part of it.

Having been kidnapped at the start of all this, though, Sadie exerts her autonomy in pretty much every way. In her newborn years, in which she is more temperamental (though that isn't saying much; she's still pretty mellow by newborn vampire standards), she confronts Jasper for what he did, and he pretty much just takes it; things have worked out pretty great for him, so it's only fair to let her get it off her chest. Sadie can feel the bond between her and Alice and Jasper, but she can also feel that he didn't have to do what he did. She goes to visit her human family, once she knows that she won't eat them; she and Rosalie go on lengthy road trips; she and Emmett go to football games; she goes volunteering and home renovating with Esme; she learns languages and musical instruments from Edward; she learns vampire history from Carlisle and even joins him on a trip to Volterra.

She lets Alice buy her clothes but overall gives Jasper a wide berth.

Alice, having gained full trust from Jasper, is able to convince him to allow Sadie her space for a while, as she comes to terms with everything that happened. Jasper agrees, since Sadie isn't so fragile anymore and he knows that Alice is keeping an eye on her. So long as they know where Sadie is at all times, and so long as she is accompanied by at least one of the Cullens, he can bear to spend uninterrupted one-on-one time with his newest mate, especially if doing so will help Sadie to forgive him.

The diet of animal blood makes him less wild (but more tense, as he can feel that he is weaker), and the newness of everything in Sadie's life raises her spirits. Maybe eventually she'll be willing to hang out with him again, but it'll take a few years.

[fckedupnerd]

*** Warning: Series 3 BBC Ghosts spoilers ahead***

So, after series 3 of Ghosts I think I’m all-in on Thomas/Kitty as endgame couple-wise.

I’d kinda wondered whether Kitty had a little bit of a crush on Thomas in previous seasons, and (at least for me) the way she ‘cast’ Thomas in her memories (the scene in s3e5) as a gentleman suitor who wanted to dance with her specifically, I think that pretty much confirmed it for me.

He’s so hung up on Alison at the moment that I don’t think he’d notice if Kitty was interested, but I think if he could move past the thing with Alison he and Kitty might actually be really good for each other… hear me out:

- they’re from very similar time periods so there’s not a huge cultural gap there time-wise. They were also both upper-class.

- they’re both a bit sheltered and naive, but ultimately (I think) good-natured.

- they both obviously, desperately crave love and attention. Right now (for both of them) that need is Alison-focused, but if they shifted that focus to one another it might fill an emotional void for them both.

- On a related note, as we are reminded when Kitty hugged Alison in s3e6, neither of them even *could* get much physical affection from Alison, even if she ever actually wanted to give it to them. The living and the dead are canonically incompatible physical-affection wise. However, as we learned in s3e4, the ghosts can do pretty much anything they want with other ghosts. So, their best bet for some kind of a physical relationship (if that’s something they wanted) *would* be with another ghost, and definitely NOT with Alison.

- honestly, I think it’d be really healthy for Thomas to start to fancy someone who *doesn’t* just remind him of Alison (or Isabelle, which is what I’ve always assumed his reason for fancying Alison so much is in the first place).

- I’ve seen some debate about Kitty’s canonical age, but especially given what we now know about her backstory, I truly believe that she is supposed to be a canonical adult. I’ve seen some people say they think she’s supposed to be a minor, but they’ve never said that explicitly (to my knowledge, I think Lolly said she played her like a teenager, but that could also mean 18/19 which would still be of legal age). Her backstory actually helped confirm for me that she’s probably a canonical ADULT, but just verrry sheltered/upperclass, didn’t really have to ‘grow up’ or have much exposure to the outside world. Firstly, in the flashbacks when the illusion breaks and we see her actual family members, her sister is clearly an adult, and her father is clearly old enough to have adult daughters. Also, they’re invited to a Ball, and they’re being courted by the gentlemen (played in Kitty’s memories by Thomas and Mike) at the party beforehand, so I can’t imagine that she’s a “literal child/minor” like some people in the fandom like to scream and get annoyed about about anytime anyone mentions Kitty in fic. Imho, based on these elements of ACTUAL CANON, late teens (but legal)/early twenties is a very reasonable assumption.

- I’ve also seen people debate Thomas’s age a bit, as it’s not explicit in canon either and he’s canonically unmarried which would have been unusual for a gentleman with some money after a certain age, in his day. I’ve said that my take is this, the intention is probably for the character to have been late 20’s/early 30’s, but I usually lean more towards early 30’s since I’d have trouble placing a character played by Mat much younger than that (not meant as an insult, he’s 40 so my saying I actually *could* place him early 30’s is meant as a huge compliment).

- provided that those assumptions about their character ages are correct, they’d be a good match for one another age-wise also (I assume they’re meant to be the two youngest ghosts except, of course, for Jemima LOL)

Anyway, I’m all-in on Thomas/Kitty endgame now. It’s not really a big ‘ship’ for me fic-wise or anything (I think Thomas/Julian is the hottest ship, so that’s most of the fic I read), but as far as what I’d like to see in the actual show itself I think that’d be a really lovely way to go. I think both Kitty and Thomas deserve to find something more fulfilling and appropriate for them than just pining for Alison, and I also think Lolly and Mathew are particularly brilliant at the emotional storylines and would be able to play it really beautifully if given the opportunity. ❤️

Also, their ship-name could be Titty. So, there’s that. 😂

[paperpennies]

Please tell me about your AU idea where Sasha and Milla meet in Brazil as teenagers and basically end up long-distance dating before either of them become Psychonauts ^_^

Oh hey look at that, totally out of nowhere, not prompted by me at all! (@2somethingelseyoumightknow2 and @strawberry-et also asked me about it but it seems redundant to answer three separate asks. I didn’t think three people would actually do it lol. Also sorry for taking 8 years to answer.) This idea came out of just smushing two thoughts together. Then I got weirdly attached. Buckle in; it’s gonna be pretty long.  Under a cut to avoid annoying feed scrolling.

So, AU is: Sasha mom lives, meaning he turns out a lot better emotionally adjusted since he grows up with at least one attentive parent. His dad is better too- still pretty emotionally constipated but not, like, broken the way he is in canon. The family also has 4-5 more kids after Sasha. This does mean they’re pretty poor but they do okay. 

His mother is a schoolteacher, who is somewhat unusual in the time period for working and being a mom of a big family at the same time. She and Sasha are quite close; he gets a lot of his intellectual and curious side from her. In his eyes, he’s much more like her than like his dad (although people who know them both would say he’s a lot more like his father than he thinks). His mother also knows about his psychic powers, having noticed them as soon as they started showing up, but his dad and siblings (probably) don’t. 

The story starts when Sasha is 14-15 years old. He’s getting increasingly bored living in a small rural town with few opportunities related to his interests, and his developing psychic powers (and probable undiagnosed autism) make things even more complicated and difficult for him. His mother gets an opportunity, probably with some kind of charity organization, to go teach German/English and maybe other stuff in Brazil for a while. She decides to take it, and take Sasha with her so he can have some different life experiences. She also takes his youngest sister along, since she’s still very little and dad’s already going to be left alone with three other kids. 

(Also, my assumed age for Sasha and Milla in the games is like mid-30s, which, if the games take place in mid/late 80s, would mean they were born in the mid-50s. That means they would be 14-15 in the late 60s. So that’s the timeline I’m going with here.) 

So they go to Brazil. The school Sasha’s mom is working at is either at or associated with an orphanage- maybe a church that has a school and an orphanage. Of course, Milla is there. I don’t have a lot of the details locked in here. It’s hard because we know nothing about Milla’s family or life before she was working at the orphanage, so I’m really just pulling this out of nowhere to fit in with this AU. For the purposes of this, she has no family and is living at the orphanage and going to the school there (even though that’s sad and I kinda don’t like it. May change it. Hm.)

Anyway, Sasha’s mom is teaching at the school; Sasha is doing basically independent study. I also haven’t decided if Milla is in his mom’s classes, because I haven’t decided what age group(s) she’s teaching. Either Milla’s in her classes or gets employed (or volunteers) to babysit Sasha’s little sister and that’s how she comes to be around. Oh, and also for the purposes of this, Sasha’s mom already spoke Portuguese before this, and Sasha’s been learning it prior to arriving there, so he’s like conversational at least. 

Either way, Sasha and Milla meet. Despite having some initial personality conflict, they find they have a weird connection to each other. Milla is curious about this feeling and interprets it as maybe being a crush, although it feels a little bit different. She decides to try and befriend him to understand it better, and also because that’s just what Milla does. She’s the sort of person who makes people her friends half-against-their-will just by being friendly and caring consistently until they can’t deny that they’re friends.

Sasha, meanwhile, is wary of her and her enthusiasm because he’s not great with the social stuff, especially with the culture and language gaps at play. He’s also wary of the feeling because it seems psychic-related, but he doesn’t know what that means. Plus Milla is like super pretty and nice and he gets tongue-tied and red-faced whenever she talks to him, but he definitely doesn’t like her shut up Mom.

Over time, Milla’s determination prevails, and they become genuine friends. He hides the fact that he’s psychic at first, but eventually does tell her. He asks her if she’s sure she’s not psychic, because she really seems psychic somehow. She doesn’t think she is, but he theorizes she’s probably not quite normal, at least, and that’s where the connection they’ve felt from the beginning comes from.

Since they’re actually perfect for each other, their friendship grows deeper over the months they spend hanging out. By the time Sasha has to leave, they’ve developed real romantic (in a 14-15 year old way) feelings for each other. They don’t ever really talk about it, but promise to write.

And they do. Sasha’s siblings start referring to the girl he writes to as his girlfriend to tease/annoy him, but eventually it sticks. He stops protesting, although he never confirms whether or not it’s true, and it starts being matter-of-fact to them instead of a joke. On Milla’s side, she still talks about him to her friends like he’s still there, and she gets the penpal-boyfriend teasing, too. It doesn’t really bug her, though. They save up money over a few years to go and visit each other, and talk about their relationship enough to be sort of “official”. It’s rough since they rarely get to see each other in person or even talk on the phone, but they keep going. 

Years pass, and some things change and others don’t. Sasha mother dies when he’s in his late teens, and he and his dad start having bigger and bigger issues between them in the wake of greiving. He leaves home as soon as he’s sure his younger siblings will be fine without him around. Out and about in the world, he gets recruited into the Psychonauts within the next few years (the specifics of this don’t matter too much for this AU). Milla goes on to work in her orphanage, the thing she’s most passionate about. They still keep close in touch, and get to see each other a more often now that they’re grown up and Sasha has better access to international travel. They finally decide “okay yes, we really are actually dating” even though it’s still long distance. Sasha’s colleagues 100% do not believe his story about having a beautiful long-distance girlfriend in Brazil, because that would sound fake af even if wasn’t coming from the very serious, not-romantic-at-all Sasha. Even his picture of them together does not convince them.

Then, the thing happens. Milla’s orphanage burns down, and her psychic powers finally fully awaken. Because of her knowledge of psychics, she realizes what’s happening, but it’s still a horrifically traumatic event. Sasha takes a leave period to come and help her, finds that it’s even more serious than he’d expected, and puts her in touch with the Psychonauts directly for some better assistance. He’s too close to her to do more than an initial check-up himself. 

They find Milla has a lot of potential and extend an offer to join the intern program (which at that time spans a larger age range than later on). She rejects the offer at first, tries to go back to her life, but later decides she needs to make a complete change and accepts. Sasha’s colleagues are shocked to find out she is indeed real. She graduates first out of her class, as one of the best levitators the organization has ever seen. Technically, she and Sasha aren’t supposed to be romantically involved as agents, but the Psychonauts have always been pretty loosey-goosey about that rule (given the history of its founders). 

So that was a novel in length. It’s not necessarily that interesting in this form, but there’s the AU. I think the interest would be the specifics of how their relationship would play out as a story, if they met young enough and under the right circumstances to not to get stuck in the hang-ups their relationship has in canon. If you read this far, tell me what you think! Thoughts, feelings, emotional outbursts?

[pinkczennie]

Male escort | Johnny (m)

Summary: After getting your heart broken, you hire a male escort to spend Christmas with you.

Pairings: male escort!Johnny x female reader

Genre: fluff, a tiny bit of angst (breakup), smut

Word count: 5k 

Warnings: mature language, explicit sexual content, fingering, protected sex

Notes: I don’t know how escorts work completely so I’m just using my imagination and assuming based on a film I was inspired by. This is my first fic in a while so I hope you guys like it! 

Tag list: @commentgirl​ 

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Great. Just great, you thought to yourself.

Today is December 19, just a few days away from Christmas. You just finished work for the day and you were counting down the days until you get to spend Christmas with your boyfriend.

That was until your boyfriend said he wanted to break up with you.

You felt your heart shattering as he broke the news to you and tears threatening to escape your eyes. Honestly, you should have seen this coming because it explains why he hasn’t been spending much time with you lately and the texts became less frequent but you just assumed he was busy. 

You walked back to your apartment that day feeling completely numb. You couldn’t believe your boyfriend of two years just broke up with you, a few days away from Christmas nonetheless. That evening, you stayed in bed crying your eyes out. Thankfully, your roommate was staying over at her boyfriend's apartment for the night, so you wailed and cried your heart out. You didn’t eat or drink anything at all and you probably would have dehydrated and starved yourself had it not been for the ping coming from your phone, signaling a text message.

You peered at your phone, a piece of you hoping it was your boyfriend messaging you to say that he’s sorry, that he made a mistake, and wanted you back.

Unfortunately, it was just your roommate.

My joy, Sooyoung <3: Hey can you open the door for me pls? I need to grab something real quick from my room but I forgot my keys at jaehyun’s apartment as he was driving me here lol

Wiping your tear-filled eyes, you got up slowly from bed with what little strength you had left and dragged your feet out of your room and to the front door without checking your appearance in the mirror first. 

You arrive at the front door and open it for your roommate to enter. 

“Hey girl, sorry about th-”

When Sooyoung and Jaehyun both got a good look at you, their eyes widened at the sight of your appearance.

There was a crumpled up tissue in your hand, your hair was a mess, and your eyes were red.

“Y/n...are you okay? What’s wrong?”

Her question triggered tears to flow out again. No, you were not okay.

“Lucas, broke up with me,” you said quietly, trying not to have a breakdown in front of the two.

“What?” Sooyoung gasps. “Oh no, y/n...come here.” 

Sooyoung engulfs you in a giant hug and you lean into her body as you silently cry into the tissue in your hands, not wanting to stain her jacket and hair with your tears.

“I’m sorry, y/n,” Jaehyun says as he places his hand on your shoulder. 

“Thanks, Jaehyun,” you croak out.   

“Do you want to talk about it?” Sooyoung asks. 

And that's how all three of you ended up in the living room. You sat on the couch with a bottle of water in your hand, which Soyoung thankfully got for you from the kitchen. Sooyoung sat by your side and Jaehyun sat by her side as you explained to the two about what happened.

“That piece of shit,” Sooyoung mutters, “I’m going to kick him in the balls if I ever see his face.”

Jaehyun rubs comforting circles around the top of Sooyoung’s hand with his thumb, trying to sooth his seething girlfriend. 

“It’s okay, Sooyoung. You don’t have to do that. He was a great boyfriend to me.” You soften as you reminisce about all the good memories you had with him during those two years, which only made your heart hurt more as you remember. 

“I’m just upset at the fact that he broke up with me so close to the holidays even though I had all these plans I made with him already. I bought us two tickets for the Christmas fair, I made prepaid reservations at a fancy restaurant, I even booked a hotel....” Your voice lowers to a whisper as you said that last part. 

“I don’t know what to do now since my flight to visit my parents won’t be until the day after Christmas because I already told them I was going to spend Christmas day with Lucas. All he could say was ‘sorry, but I don’t think I can continue with this relationship any longer’.” 

“I’m sorry, girl,” Sooyoung pats your shoulder. 

“It’s okay,” you sigh. “I guess I’ll just figure out what to do with the ticket and reservations since it looks like I’ll be spending my Christmas day here, eating ice cream and binge watching anime until my flight.” 

You’d offer it to Sooyoung and Jaehyun but you already knew they planned to go to a ski resort during Christmas, so you’ll have to find someone else who would want them.

“Is there maybe some other guy you could possibly go with?” Sooyoung suggests. 

You shake your head. “I’d rather not go with anyone I know just so it doesn’t get awkward and no one gets any strange ideas that I might be interested in them.”

Sooyoung turns to Jaehyun. “Hey, you have some single guy friends, right?”

“Yeah…” Jaehyun hesitantly nods.

“Do you have any guy friends who might be able to go with her? Like...Yuta?”

“He already went back to Japan to visit for the holidays.”

“What about Sicheng?”

“His flight to China is in three days.”

“Mark?”

“Canada.”

“Doyoung?”

“He’s recently been seeing someone.” 

Sooyoung sighs and taps her chin as she thinks of any other possible solution while you internally groan at the thought of having to spend Christmas single AND alone.

“But, if you want,” Jaehyun speaks up after a silent pause, “why don’t you hire a male escort?”

Both you and Sooyoung perk up at Jaehyun’s suggestion. 

“A male escort?” Sooyoung questions.

“Yeah. I knew one of my frat bros from college who hired a female escort. And don’t worry, escorts aren’t just for sex. You can just hire a guy as your fake boyfriend for a day just so you could have some company and your plans don’t have to go to waste. I can even ask him for the website he searched on.”

Sooyoung looks at you. “It’s just a suggestion. You don’t have to do it though.“  

Maybe it was just the loneliness that got to you, but you were honestly considering it. “I’ll keep it in mind.” 

After an hour, you felt bad for holding them up so you decided to end it there. At first, Sooyoung was hesitant to leave you alone, but you insisted because you already felt bad for making them stay for a whole hour listening to you.

“Alright then, we’re leaving now,” Sooyoung said at the door before gently squeezing your arm. “Make sure to eat something, drink some water, and shower before you go to bed tonight. And call me if you need anything, okay?”

“I will.”

And with that, the two left. 

You did as Sooyoung asked. You ate some ramen noodles because you didn’t have the stomach to eat much or cook anything, and finished a bottle of water. Then, you took a nice, warm shower, changed into a comfy pair of pajamas, and went to bed. After the rough day you had, you were able to knock out pretty quickly from exhaustion. 

------

You woke up the next day with swollen eyes, probably from all the crying last night. Instead of getting up, you just laid in bed staring at the ceiling. Your body felt heavy and you lacked any motivation to get up.

After a few minutes, you reached for your phone to check the time and any messages. It was currently 11:16 am. You received a couple of notifications since the last time you checked your phone. 

After looking through all your notifications, you decided to check Instagram. When you clicked on Lucas’s profile, your heart sank when you saw that he had already blocked you. You probably assume he already blocked your phone number and other social media accounts too. 

You were about to cry again at the thought, but then you remembered what Jaehyun said. 

A male escort.

Jaehyun sent you the website link the night before, just in case you wanted to take his suggestion. 

It took you a moment, before you said fuck it. 

You sat up from bed to retrieve your laptop on your desk beside the bed and brought it to your lap. You turned the laptop on and typed in the website link. 

Seekingescorts.com  

There were hundreds of escorts to choose from. Each of the escorts had pictures attached of what they looked like and basic information listed, such as their name, age, height, etc.

Thankfully, there were filters presented for you to narrow down the choices of escorts, such as gender preference, age window, and within a certain distance of your location. After filtering your preferences, the escorts were narrowed down to just seven people. You looked through the profiles of the available seven escorts and the third escort instantly caught your attention. 

 Name: Johnny Suh

Age: 25

Height: 6’0”

He looked extremely attractive in the photos provided, not that the other escorts weren’t attractive, but Johnny just seemed more your type.

After looking through the other escort’s profile, you knew for sure your mind was set on Johnny. You pressed on his profile, filled in the necessary information required, and clicked submit. 

Thank you for your submission. You will receive an email confirmation and a message from the escort you have chosen shortly. 

You did it. You actually hired an escort. 

A couple hours later after going about your day, you receive a text message from an unsaved number.

Hello, this is Johnny Suh. Thank you for hiring me as your escort on December 25 from 1pm to 11pm. I have read through the information you have given me and look forward to spending my time with you. Please let me know where you would like for us to meet and any other information I should know. 

After reading through his message, you reply back to him with the meeting location.  

There wasn’t any other communication sent between you two after that, other than a I’ll see you at 1pm, so you just counted down the days left until you would be spending Christmas with Johnny.

-----

Today is December 25. 

You looked at your phone. It was currently 12:58pm, two minutes before the time you were supposed to meet Johnny. 

You had a light layer of makeup on and dressed as nice and warm as possible because it was pretty cold today. Your heart pounded from nervousness as you thought of all the possible scenarios as to how the day will unfold while making your way to the designated meeting point that you and Johnny agreed on. Once you arrived, you stood there and stared at the people passing by as you waited for Johnny to arrive. 

As you stared at the people passing by, you suddenly began to hesitate, feeling dumb for hiring a male escort to pretend to be your boyfriend so you can spend your plans with someone that were originally supposed to be spent with your now ex-boyfriend.

What am I doing? You thought to yourself. This is stupid, I can’t believe I’m doing this. This was such a selfish and impulsive decision just because I didn’t want to be alone on Christmas. I should have just stayed home, not go out with some male escort I don’t even-

“Y/n?” 

You turn around at the mention of your name. 

Whoa. 

You stare up at the man that just called your name and you were absolutely speechless. 

Johnny looked just like in his photos, maybe even better in person. He could even pass off as a model. His hair was nicely styled and he was dressed in a long, beige coat, and black jeans. He was tall, had a sharp jawline, and the most mesmerizing eyes that you were slowly getting lost in. There were no words to describe this man other than absolutely stunning. 

“Are you y/n l/n?” Johnny asks, snapping you back into reality.

“Y-yes,” you stutter. 

“Hi, I’m Johnny.” He extends his hand out for you to shake with a gentle smile on his face. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too.” You shake his hand. 

“You look really pretty today, y/n.”

You blush at the compliment. “Thank you. You look really good too.”

“Thanks,” he smiles. “Are you excited for today?” 

“Yeah. A little nervous as well,” you honestly confess. “I’ve never hired an escort before so I don’t know what I’m supposed to do.”

“Whatever you want to do, just let me know and I will happily do so. Also, if anything I do makes you feel uncomfortable, tell me and I will stop. My goal for today is to be the best boyfriend for you. Alright?” 

You nod, feeling a little less nervous at how easygoing he seems.

“What are we doing first today, my love?” he asks before taking one of your hands in his and presses a kiss to the top of your hands.

You swoon at his gesture before quickly pulling out the two tickets to the fair from your pocket and presenting it to him. 

Johnny looks at the pieces of paper in your hands. “The Christmas fair first? Alrighty then, let’s go!” 

And thus your day began with Johnny at the fair. You two played games, rode on the rides, and ate fried food together. For hours, it was just filled with fun and laughter. 

There were quite a few people, so Johnny would hold your hand to keep you by his side whenever you two would walk by a large crowd, making sure no one strays away from each other. 

For a second, it didn’t even feel like you were with an escort because Johnny was such a natural at playing the boyfriend role that there was never an awkward moment with him. It genuinely seemed like you two were just a couple going on a date to anybody looking. 

If Johnny was made of something, it would be boyfriend material. He was handsome, treated you like a princess, and a great conversationalist so there was never any awkward silence.

At around 5:30pm, it was time to leave the fair because you had a prepaid dinner reservation at 6pm. 

The restaurant was dimly lit and there was a pianist softly playing classical music at the back.

A waiter from the restaurant arrived to escort you both to your reserved table in the middle of the room. The table was surrounded by lit candles, roses, expensive silverware, and a bottle of wine. 

Johnny, like the gentleman he is, pulls your chair out for you to sit and pushes the chair back to the table after you sit down before he takes his seat. The waiter opens the wine bottle and pours both of you a drink. You both clink glasses and enjoy your meals while chatting throughout the dinner.

After dinner, the fancy restaurant was in the same building as the hotel you booked, so you checked in and then headed to the elevators up eight stories to your hotel room.

You both look around the nice hotel room in awe. There was a nice view of the city lights by the window, a single king-sized bed, and a large bathroom by the door.

There were a basket of flowers and a card that sat on the table. You went over to read the card and your heart clenches.

Welcome to the SME Hotel, y/n and Lucas. 

You forgot to call the hotel ahead of time to get his name removed or changed. 

You were so distracted by the card that you didn’t even notice Johnny looking over your shoulder, peering at the card in your hand that has your attention. He reads the card and notices the male name, ‘Lucas’, written after yours. Then, Johnny looks at you and notices your sad eyes.

Johnny walks in front of you and gently cups your face, grabbing your attention as he brings your face up to look at him.

“Is something wrong, my love?” he asks.

You look away from his gaze with a shake of your head. “Nothing’s wrong."

“Are you sure? Because you looked really upset reading that card. You can tell me if anything’s wrong.”

You stay quiet for a moment before you release a sigh.

“I was supposed to spend Christmas with my boyfriend. Well...ex-boyfriend now,” you explain. “He broke up with me a few days ago, even though we had all these plans together. I guess I just got a little upset when I saw his name on this card because I’m suddenly reminded that we’re no longer together.”

Johnny softens at your story and strokes your cheeks with his thumbs. “I’m sorry he did that to you. I know it hurts right now, but just know that the pain will slowly go away with time, and you will find someone new again.”

You nod with a sad smile. 

“But for today, you’re mine. So I don’t want you to be thinking about another man in front of me or I’ll get jealous.” 

You know Johnny is just playing the character of your boyfriend, but you couldn’t help but feel your heart skip a beat at his words. 

He takes the welcome card from your hand and places it back, face down, on the table.

“Come here.” He brings you into his warm embrace. You softly smile at his comforting gesture and hug him back.  

You both just stand there while hugging each other until an idea suddenly pops up into his head. “Hey, let’s get your mind off of him for a moment.” 

You look up at him with a raised eyebrow and tilt your head to the side at his words. 

Then, Johnny takes out his phone and clicks on the Spotify app. Suddenly, Taylor Swift featuring Shawn Mendes’s Lover plays. He turns the volume up to the highest setting before placing his phone on the table. Then, he turns to you and brings his hands out.

“Dance with me.” 

You stare at him for a second before looking down at his extended hands and slowly take his hands. 

We could leave the Christmas lights up ‘til January. This is our place we make the rules.

The dance began playful, filled with giggles and laughter as Johnny spun you around, doing elegant twirls. 

Can I go where you go? Can we always be this close? Forever and ever. 

As the song progresses, Johnny brings your head to rest against his head and you melt into his body. His arms wrap around your back and your arms wrap around him. You both close your eyes and silently listen to the song while your bodies slowly sway to the music.

See I finally got you now, honey. I won’t let you fall.

There was nothing on your mind right now except Johnny and the feeling of his body against yours and the steady beating of his heart against his chest. 

Oh, you’re my, my, my, my. Darling, you’re my, my, my, my lover. 

The music ends. 

You remove yourself from Johnny’s body to look up at him who was already staring down at you with a tender gaze. For a moment, you were both just lost in each other's eyes. Slowly, your eyes went from his eyes to his lips. 

You gulp. The longer you stared, the more you thought about leaning in to kiss his plump lips. Is it wrong to have such a strong desire to kiss another man a few days after getting dumped? 

“What are you thinking about right now?” he asks, his voice one octave lower, making you feel some type of way. 

“How much I want to kiss you,” you confess. You don’t know where this newfound confidence to say that sentence out loud came from, but knowing that you probably won’t be getting another opportunity like this any time soon, you threw all care out the window. 

Johnny leans in dangerously close with a smirk on his face. “Then do it.”

No one knows who leaned in first, but the next thing you know is that you’re both kissing each other. 

The kiss starts off gentle, like two lovers kissing each other for the first time again. Then, the kiss became more intense as Johnny’s arms wrap around your waist to pull you closer into his body and your arms cling onto Johnny’s shoulders.

Eventually, you both part ways to gasp for air without letting go of each other. You look up at Johnny with eyes full of lust and his eyes are just as dark as yours. The sexual tension was lingering in the air and you couldn’t take it anymore. You feel wetness pool in your underwear that you could no longer ignore and you desperately want him to do something about it.

“Johnny…” you breath out.

“Do you want to…” He didn’t finish his sentence but you already know where this is going.

“Are you sure? You’re not obligated to just because you’re-”

“You’re not forcing me to do anything. I want to do this,” he states. “Do you?”

You search his eyes for a bit before you reply, “Yes. I want you too.”

The verbal consent was enough for him to dive back in for another kiss. You wrap your arms around Johnny’s neck as you feel him lift you up with his arms and make his way over to the bed where he gently places you on your back without breaking the kiss. 

You shiver as Johnny stops kissing you and begins sucking open mouth kisses on your neck, but not leaving any marks in case you didn’t want any visible hickies on your skin.

He removes all your clothes, so you were completely bare in front of him. You become shy as Johnny’s large figure looms over you, his hungry eyes raking over your exposed body while he’s still fully clothed.

Johnny brings his face right in front of your chest and cups your soft mounds. A moan escapes your lips as he suddenly takes one of your erect nipples into his mouth and pinches the other one in between his fingers. As he continues to suck on your bud, you feel something poking your thigh, so your hand palms his erection and he shudders at the contact.

After a while, he removes himself from your breasts and starts taking his clothes off but keeps his pants on. 

You couldn’t help but stare at the sight in front of you because Johnny was built like a Greek god, sculpted by the finest artists. 

“Like what you see?” he smirks.

You nod. You weren’t even going to deny it and he chuckles at your honesty.

He brings two of his fingers to your awaiting entrance and you shudder.

“God, you’re fucking soaked,” he whispers into your ears. His sultry voice and fingers rubbing against your folds just made you even more wet.

He slowly pushes his two fingers inside of you and you bite back a moan. Oh god. 

“Let me hear you,” he says as he nibbles on your earlobe. “I want to know that I make you feel good.”

Johnny slowly thrusts his digits in and out of you as you release your moans that you could no longer hold in for him to hear. 

Once he thought that you were ready, he added a third finger and you grip the bedsheet from the additional intrusion.  

“Johnny,” you gasp as he brushes against your walls and hits that one spot that causes your body to arch against the bed.

“Right there,” you chant so he continues to rub against that spot.

You could already feel your orgasm starting to approach as your breathing becomes harsh and your wall clenches around his fingers as the pleasure continues to build up in your body.

You usually last longer than this, but something about doing this with Johnny, a somewhat stranger to you, an attractive stranger might you add, made it so much more thrilling. 

“I’m going to cum,” you warn him.

“Go ahead. Cum for me.” 

After a few more thrusts, you cry out in bliss and release all over his fingers. You pant heavily as you quickly try to recover, knowing that there was more to come. 

As you try to recover, Johnny finally removes his pants and boxers, allowing his cock to spring forward. You look down and your eyes widen at the sight of his erection. Holy shit, he’s huge. 

As you continue to stare, he reaches for the condom in the bedside table drawer he found while looking around the room earlier and rips the plastic open. 

He was able to get hard from kissing and fingering you, so he easily puts the condom onto his dick without any additional stimulation and positions his length in front of your entrance.

“Are you ready?” he asks.

Your heart was pounding, wondering if he’ll even fit inside of you. But regardless, you still nod. 

Johnny slowly enters you and you gasp at the pain and the pleasure. It felt like he was ripping you in half, even after being stretched open with three fingers.

“Shit, you’re still tight,” he hisses as he continues to enter you.

“Too big,” you whimper as your nails dig into the mattress. 

“I’ll go slow.” He kisses your forehead to distract you from the pain and continues to slowly enter you, just as promised. Once he is fully inside you, he waits patiently for you to adjust to his size. “Let me know when I can move.”

After adjusting to his size, you tell Johnny that he can move. 

He begins his thrusts slow just in case it was still too much for you. He was so gentle with you as if you were going to break. You were still slightly overstimulated from being fingered earlier, but you didn’t care and allowed Johnny to thrust inside you. 

"Faster,” you plead and he does as you request. You moan his name, along with a string of curses, as he begins to pick up the pace. 

The room was filled with nothing but the sounds of loud panting, skin slapping against skin, and the bed creaking as Johnny pounds into you. Hopefully, the hotel walls are thick because the people staying in the rooms next door or even passing by would surely be able to hear everything.

It didn’t take long for your second orgasm to approach again and he could feel it too as your walls clench around his length. 

“I’m going to cum again,” you announce.

“Fuck, me too. You feel so good, baby.” Johnny begins to groan and his thrusts become less accurate, signaling that he was close too.

Your toes curl and your back is arching off the bed as you come around his cock. With one last thrust, he groans and releases his seeds into the condom. 

Both of you just stay in your current positions, chest heaving as you both try to come down from your highs. After a minute, Johnny slowly pulls himself out of you and gets up from the bed to make his way to the bathroom. He removes the cum filled condom, ties it up, and tosses it into the trash can. Then, he returns to the bed and plants a kiss on your cheek before wrapping his arms around your body in a warm embrace. 

For the remainder of the time left, you and Johnny just cuddled naked under the blanket until your time with him was up. 

“What did you think of everything?” Johnny asks.

“Are you referring to the date or the sex?” You tease.

Johnny laughs, “The date, you pervert. But yes, I’d like to know how the sex was too.”

Seeing his laughing face brought a satisfied smile to your lips. “I had a really good time today. And the sex? Wow.” 

“I’m glad.” Johnny returns a smile and he brushes a stray hair of yours away from your face. “I had a good time today too.” 

There was a comforting silence before you hesitantly ask, “Do you do it with all your clients?” 

“Not all of them. We have the right to say no,” he replies. “And don’t worry, I always do it protected and get tested regularly just in case.”

A few minutes before 11pm, you both start putting your clothes back on because it was almost time for Johnny’s departure. You were quite sad the day is already over, but today has been such an eventful day. 

Even though you knew Johnny was just a male escort only meant to comfort you by spending the day with you so you wouldn't be alone during Christmas, you were going to feel empty once again. But you were still happy nonetheless. Johnny made you feel so loved, even if it was just temporary. You were so glad to have met Johnny because this will be a Christmas worth remembering for sure. 

You walk him to the door once 11pm hits. 

“Thank you for today, Johnny,” you smile up at him. 

He returns the smile back, “It was my pleasure.” 

Johnny leans down and presses a gentle kiss on your forehead. You just couldn’t get enough of his kisses. 

“Goodnight, y/n. Merry Christmas.”

“Goodnight, Johnny. Merry Christmas.”

And with that, he turns around and walks away from your hotel room and heads to the elevator. You wait until you are no longer able to see Johnny before retreating back into your room and shutting the door behind you.

A loud sigh escapes your lips as you stare at the empty hotel room as memories of your day with Johnny flooded your mind. This day didn’t turn out like you expected it to, but it was way better than what you could have hoped for. 

You were definitely going to have to thank Jaehyun later. 

The loneliness begins to settle in again, so you grab your phone from the bedside table and begin to type a text message to someone, then hit send. 

You: Can I see you again on New Years?