#shen yaps

[shentheauthor]

Breaking my Arcane silence to say Caitlyn Kiramman is my favorite character and s2 has not changed that.

Bigotry preys on vulnerable people like her. It gives them someone to blame rather than helping them through whatever it is they’re going through. It’s like how lonely, depressed men often become incels. They are given someone to blame— women— and become misogynists because of it.

Of course there is often some internalized bias there. I don’t think Cait has deconstructed her classism much by the end of s1, and right now, that’s being made worse. She’s been given an enemy rather than support, so she doesn’t have to stop and think and process her grief. It’s easier that way.

She’s also great representation of what happens sometimes when grief is incredibly fresh. You don’t WANT support or help, because those people want you to process it. They want you to think about it, and right now, that hurts too much. Or they’ll tell you that you’re wrong, and even if they’re right, you don’t want to hear that. That’s Cait right now. Vi is right, and Cait doesn’t want to hear it because it HURTS.

I know it seems like she’s had plenty of time to think about what she’s doing, and she definitely has… but the real key here is she hasn’t given herself time to think about her mother. She threw herself into finding Jinx almost immediately, and it doesn’t help that Piltover is on the brink of war with Zaun. She hasn’t had any time to process her feelings, which is incredibly important to making good decisions.

I love her so much. She’s flawed, and she’s going down a terrible path, but her writing is so important. It’s important to see these stories, because this happens in real life (although most of the time it isn’t as extreme as war and gassing people). Cait is such a well-written character, and that’s why she’s my favorite character in Arcane.

[k0mmari]

Endless Abyss(kinda)! SY AU

First things first, this is very much inspired by this post by @/rainbowsmagicandshit and @/allpiesforourown, HIGHLY recommend reading that fist just to get a glimpse of where I started off, but do note I have accidentally deviated from the original idea a bit, so uh, oops ig.

This was born out of a mix of different ideas (as usual), so think of this as ‘The AU where SY is a demon, and also the Endless Abyss, and also my excuse to have Binghe possibly make a harem consisting entirely of SY’s’, or, as I like to call it:

As per usual, Shen Yuan has died. It happens to the best of us, and of course, he died while reading the glittering piece of trash that is Proud Immortal Demon Way.But, as he is in the process of getting snatched away by the System, something goes wrong, and the System has to quickly redirect itself and it causes SY to get knocked out of course.

His soul scrambles to find a new host, and it manages to find someone suitable enough. When SY wakes up though, he isn’t greeted by the sight of a roof, or a forest, or anything remotely familiar; instead, the moment he regains consciousness, he’s senses are flooded with as much information as possible. It’s like a computer with too many tabs open, but in this case, you can see all the tabs at the same time and all of them are playing the most obnoxiously loud videos possible, in fact, everything feels so overwhelming even thinking becomes too much.

What SY doesn’t know is that he has transmigrated into the body of a Titan, an almost extinct godly demon race that only existed in the confines of Airplane’s first drafts, and it turns out shoving a human soul into the body of a deity doesn’t bode so well, since what the human mind is able to process doesn’t even come close to what a Titan is able to feel. So because SY can’t get a hold of his own mind, his control of his own body is also not great, and he is completely unaware as his newly acquired body goes on a rampage.

See, SY is currently in a very old version of the Demon Realm, so old in fact, Heavenly Demons still rule over the Realm. It really is quite a shame that SY wasn’t in his right mind at the time, and instead of being able to observe how ancient Heavenly Demons governed demonic society, he instead accidentally set on a path of destruction, with the casualties being anything that had the bad luck of standing in his way. In fact, the destruction got so bad a few of the Heavenly Demons rulers, who notoriously hated each other, settles on a temporary peace agreement and joined forces to stop the mad Titan.

SY, in his frenzied state, didn’t even notice as hundreds of years went by as the Heavenly Demons tried to stop him, and also barely noticed when they finally managed to chain him down and cast him away to be forever banished to the Endless Abyss. His body, once so tall it grazed the clouds, was torn apart, with each of its different parts sealed away in various locations as an attempt to diminish the Titan’s power. It worked, actually, and unbeknownst to the demons, SY slowly began to get his thoughts in order; the event that finally pushed him to coherency was when a few of those Heavenly Demon rulers got greedy, and while sealing away SY’s body parts, attempted to harness his power for themselves, and tried to create legendary weapons out of his flesh and bone.

Most of them failed, a Titan’s power to overwhelming for even a Heavenly Demon to handle, but one of them succeeded, and created a powerful sword made from the Titan’s own heart: Xin Mo. Unfortunately for the creator of Xin Mo, it didn’t take long for them to fall into madness and eventually succumb to Xin Mo’s power, casting themselves away to hold onto the sword forever in the same valley SY’s hands were sealed; but it is as they say, one man’s trash is another man’s treasure, and while Xin MO’s creator perished, they managed to take enough power away from SY for him to finally be able to think.

It had been a thousand years at this point, and SY’s first coherent thought was that he desperately needed a break, and that in all these years, he hadn’t managed to get a single glimpse into the world of PIDW, and what a waste! Specially since he was now in the most interesting area Airplane had managed to create, he was itching to explore the world. Of course, in his current state he wasn’t exactly able to move (having his limbs cut off certainly didn’t help, but apparently it had been so long since he was imprisoned that his Main Body had started to fuse with the Abyss? Really, more of a slight inconvenience than anything), but he also had become tired of his Titan body with it’s Titan feelings, and so he decided to split his consciousness and create a small army of human sized avatars who were later dubbed his ‘Watchers’, who’s sole purpose was to explore the Endless Abyss and send their findings back to the Main Body (in bite sized, easy to understand thoughts).

It is the first years of his Watchers wandering about that SY finally understood what had happened to his body, and figured out that Xin Mo was a product of his flesh. He figured that since demons tried to use his body for malicious purposes before, with one even succeeding, he decided that one Xin Mo was enough, and came up with a plan: He was going to piece his Titan body back together as a means to prevent anything of the sort happening again, but he was immediately going to seal the Titan body away again, as to not have to deal with it’s overwhelming power.

As the Watchers were sent to locate his body parts again, one of their first findings were the hands, which also meant the resting place of Xin Mo itself. How lucky, he thought! He could just take the hands away and maybe leave one of the Watchers guarding Xin Mo so when Luo Binghe eventually comes to retrieve his sword, SY at least can catch a glimpse of his favorite protagonist! He wasted no time, and while his avatars tried to unseal his hands, one of them went to move Xin Mo, just so it was out of the way, and in doing so the sword retaliated and ended up disintegrating the poor Watcher. What a rude sword, going against its own body.

Fine! If Xin Mo was going to be difficult so be it, and SY formed a new plan: before reuniting his Titan body back together, SY send his Watchers to keep an eye on as much of the Endless Abyss as possible and the moment Luo Binghe fell in, he would turn to hugging the protagonist’s thigh and help him survive the harsh environment as long as Binghe took Xin Mo. Well, it should be no problem, right? Binghe was fated to get the sword one way or another, and SY is sure his involvement will be small insignificant enough that it won’t be much more of a side quest for the future Demon Emperor!

Now, if he were a half human, half Heavenly Demon teenager who just got pushed into hell by his teacher, where would he land….

*

So, as you can see, this is mostly more like SY’s origin story lol, but I’ll probably write Binghe’s first meetings with the Watchers sometime soon (hopefully).In the meantime though, enjoy some more of the bonus sketches I did while figuring out the AU, and of course, if anyone has any questions or thoughts about this, feel free to send them to me!

[everytimewetouch-dot-mp3]

cang qiong dragon god shen yuan is probably like so old that time doesn’t have meaning? like he transmigrated into pidw as a dragon and and the system gave him a few missions that functionally amounted to ‘claim this mountain range as your territory and defend it from demons’

sy didn’t realize that he was actually laying the foundation for cang qiong mountain sect before its creation. some terrifying demon demigod (one of the first heavenly demons, maybe?) pursues a band of cultivators to his mountain range, and he protects them. they settle his mountains and start cultivating, and because they’re protected by a literal god (who they call lord canglong, and they name the mountains after him) people want to study there.

so cqms is born, and sy takes a nap. when he wakes up, those cultivators he saved bring another group of cultivators, all named 'wen' to his mountain, and they ask his permission to lead the peaks next. another nap, and he wakes up to the wen generation asking his blessing for the ming generation, so on and so forth up until the qing generation. this time he recognizes names: qingge, qingfang, qingqi. this generation's leader, qingyuan. and the one whose bow is shallow and perfunctory, qingqiu. ofc sy isn't super pressed about standing on ceremony or whatever—he's only experienced like six years in this world, and most of them were spent either establishing the mountain as his territory or helping his little cultivators fight off some world-ending cataclysm or other. but he remembers the scum villain’s name, and he’s not a huge fan of the way sqq’s already proving himself to be an arrogant old shit

just like every other time, after he’s met and blessed this generation of peak lords, shen yuan falls asleep. shit!!! he meant to stay awake this time, but the system putting him to sleep is just too powerful! he’s probably missed luo binghe, damnit!!! what’s the point of transmigrating into this shitty novel if he doesn’t even get to meet the only character worth the pixels it took to type him into existence??

but as soon as he sees that fluffy-haired boy curled up in one of his caves, bruised and weeping and wondering what he’s done to be so universally hated, shen yuan knows. that’s his protagonist, and he’s really too pathetic like this. he’s really just a child. and shen yuan might have been easily annoyed by the concept of kids in his first life, but this isn’t just some whiny kid. this is the protagonist. so he does his best to calm tiny lord luo down.

and at first when lbh realizes it’s the fucking dragon god canglong speaking to him, the poor kid falls on his face kowtowing and apologizing for the intrusion, but lord canglong just…asks him what’s wrong. and then listens. and then he allows binghe to…to touch his hand???? not only that, he pats binghe’s head?? and tells him it isn’t his fault??? that one little head-pat is filled with so much spiritual power that binghe almost passes out, and soon after he recovers, lord canglong sends him back down the mountain with a renewed sense of purpose. lord canglong said binghe wasn’t stupid, wasn’t incompetent, wasn’t a failure, and binghe was determined to prove himself worthy of the sect’s guardian deity’s kindness.

and when luo binghe turns to walk down the mountain back to qing jing peak, that google translate voice pipes up in shen yuan’s ear with an update he hadn’t realized he was waiting for.

[Congratulations! Congratulations! Congratulations! Important things must be said three times! USER_002 has completed the quest {From the Ground Up}! B-points +500 USER_002 has initiated the quest {Master of Masters}! New skill [Shapeshifter] has been unlocked! Would USER_002 like to activate [Shapeshifter] now?]

shen yuan slammed the bright glowing [YES] faster than any quest the system had ever given him. that’s how he learned that he was, in fact, just naked in front of luo binghe, and the [Shapeshifter] skill didn’t come with an auto-clothed setting. thank fuck he’d already sent the protagonist away!

[skipblebee]

Cang Qiong's most annoying duo (affectionate)

[corvidaecorvidae]

Shen Qingqiu recording the Bingmei vs Bingge fight:

[wafywaify]

i hate svsss fics that downplay sqqs (yuan) trauma incredibly.

and not in the sqq pov where hes just an unreliable narrator, no, I mean when the author very clearly did not understand how dramatic what happened to him was. i dont see them very often but every time i do i just sigh and leave it lol.

i doubt this is done on purpose but for those who actually enjoy that uh view of things (?) thats fine, totally cool. kudos to you and everything- but at least put a warning in the tags. im begging.

ive gotten really into some of these fics without realizing and its just so disappointing but i cant just leave it unfinished, yknow? the shen yuan in me wont allow it

like bro literally got half his limbs ripped off by a person with the face he loved and has died for MULTIPLE TIMES. and then was raped..? by that same person??? (not that im blaming binghe, they were both victims) but like. CMON??? oh and dont even get me started on the whole "binghes going to want revenge after i unwillingly had to push him into literal hell, i must prepare" and the entire holy mausoleum arc.. aint no way hes totally chill after that man. for years he was just waiting for death while also mourning white lotus bingbing..

give me more fics of sqq having breakdowns, ptsd, trauma!! he deserves to cry!!! sqq is just as traumatized as binghe!! let the man sob!! preferably in binghes arms!!!

[sinn-bee]

Happy belated birthday to the lovely @chezpillow

Enjoy a couple of lovable dorks discussing their mutual special interest <3

[ID: A monochrome pencil illustration that has been scanned and colored digitally featuring fanart of Dungeon Meishi’s Laois, holding Kensuke, talking animatedly with Scum Villain’s Self Saving System’s Shen Qingqiu about a variety of monsters. Treasure bugs, Chimera!Fallin and the Walking Mushrooms are represented in dialogue bubbles from Laois. The Black Moon Rhinoceros-Python and Ghost Head spiders are represented in bubbles from Shen Qingqiu. They are very delighted to be sharing their knowledge of monsters with each other because they are both nerds.]

[red-garden]

Suggestion from @celestieas for qijiu xiyao solidarity

[sillygoofyqueer]

I WOULD LOVE MORE DEMON REACTIONS!! I love it both when you add lore and when you just describe sy’s relationships and peoples’ reactions to him. It is so awesome!!!! For demons I imagine that everyone is just like, look at the little funky crow man(when they aren’t terrified of his reputation at least). I imagine some upstart demon noble or something goes to try and make an alliance with/conquer the corvids or smth and then they either get absolutely bodied by the crows who don’t want to share their king or the meet sy and are just in shock because this guy?? This is the feared corvid king?? At least until sy mentions something from his knowledge of PIDW and they get absolutely freaked out because how does he know that?? What do you mean my daughter will be married off soon?? Maybe there is going to be rumors about him being a seer or something. ESPECIALLY if what sy mentions is in relation to a bloodbath that bingge from PIDW caused since crows are associated with death(at least in our world). I wonder how intimidated they would be since not only does sy have a terrifying reputation. But he is a heavenly demon. And like you mention, Tianlang-jun ran a whole empire. ALSO!! I love the reactions so much! Tianlang-jun just shipping sy with zzl when they brawl whilst sy is just in full bird brain and doesn’t want to share his shinys. Imagine all the rumors that would fly around(probably encouraged by tlj) When Binghe sees this he’d throw an absolute FIT!

There is a lot to unpack here, all of it absolutely delightful, but I'm going to be a little freak and start on what's been tugging at my mind as I read this. (I'll probably have to write a part two because I can feel my autistic little brain whirring at at least ninety miles an hour, I'm so sorry) DID YOU KNOW THAT IN GREEK MYTHOLOGY, CROWS ARE ASSOCIATED WITH APOLLO, GOD OF (amongst other things) PROPHECY. I am a teeny weeny bit of a Greek mythology nut, so this immediately jumped me the moment I read about demons viewing SY as a seer of sorts (in the instance that the system was either far more relaxed or non-existent). So, so, basically, in Greek mythology, Apollo learned that one of his lovers (Coronis, I believe) was being unfaithful through ravens/crows and this led to him turning them from white to black! Due to them being featured in this myth, he is heavily associated with them and, in general, they are associated with prophecy and divination. SO, if we want to fuck around in our little sandbox (under the impression that Airplane is stealing from other mythologies aside from just Chinese mythology), we can decide that there is at least three wife plots in PIDW that surround crows and their ideas of prophecy!!! When Shen Yuan starts blabbering about these different future events, and then they HAPPEN, the other demons are like GASP. FUCK. The crow knowss.....ANDANDANDAND, RIGHT, THE IDEA OF CROW DEMONS BEING ABLE TO DIVINE VIOLENT/DEADLY DISASTERS BECAUSE OF THEIR ASSOCIATION WITH DEATH JUST MAKES PEOPLE MORE SCARED OF SHEN YUAN'S PREDICTIONS. HFGROGERGWOHRGHGS SOSHOHRORRRY SORRY SORRY, THIS HAS BECOME A RAMBLE THAT'S ONLY A LITTLE BIT OF WHAT YOUR ASK TOUCHES UPON BUT A P O L L O . HE HAS A TUMULTUOUS RELATIONSHIP WITH CROWS/RAVENS BECAUSE HE SCORCHED THEM BLACK AND THEY CHATTED ABOUT HIS LOVER'S UNFAITHFULNESS, SO IF WE HAVE A DEITY THAT IS LIKE APOLLO IN PIDW, WE COULD ALMOST EVEN IMPLY THAT WHEN THE DIVINE CROW BEINGS FELL TO SIN, THIS IS WHAT CAUSED IT! THEY FELL TO GOSSIP AND WERE DIVINELY PUNISHED BY THIS DEITY, AND AND, OUT OF SPITE AFTER THEY BECAME ENTRENCHED IN SIN, THE HEAVENLY CROW DEMONS BEGAN DIVINING TO THE WEAK MORTALS WITHOUT THE DEITY TELLING THEM TO BECAUSE THEY WANTED TO GET BACK AT THE DEITY AHAHAHAHAHA. (obviously this isn't a definite thing, it's just an alternative way for the heavenly crows to become heavenly demons. It's just me chattering to myself) I'll make a separate post on the MAIN demons' reactions to SY but, in general, most demons are either actively petrified of him because of his image as a deity, or they're relatively disillusioned because they've seen him in person and he's been a SWEETHEART, hitting them with the wife beam. That doesn't mean that they aren't still kind of terrified of the powerful, prophetic crow heavenly demon deity, but in a "scared but horny way", and that's only when SY displays this power! Most of the time he's an undeniably strange but incredibly kind hearted guy that just seems to want to help everyone!! Even if he hates doing things!!! Tianlang-Jun is always under the full determination of "ONE of my relatives is going to marry this crow demon, or I'm going to do it myself." The first time Zhuzhi-Lang and Luo Binghe hear that they both immediately just stare at TLJ like "don't you dare, you whore" (ZZL a lot more respectful than LBH, of course), but TLJ is booored. Someone better fuck marry that freak or he'll do it himself.

(When I write part two for the important demon reactions to SY, I'll link it here, so keep an eye out!!!)

[ohai-there]

post canon SVSSS x minato hokage era naruto crossover where it's scumplane (bcos i love scumplane) heading to the elemental nations on official business for some reason or another (maybe theres a barrier between their lands to prevent leakage of spiritual energy or somethign) SJ hates being alive purely because it means he's in SQH's debt for ripping him out of SQQ's body that Shen Yuan was inhabiting and reviving SJ (because SY decided to fuck off and live his best life as the demon emperor's wife and Cang Qiong NEEDS a peak lord for Qing Jing)

canonically immortals are extremely beautiful (even SQH is described as a 'proper' face iirc) and SJ is like TOP TIER beauty, but also immortals are sometimes described to have faces 'carved from jade' so I imagine when they step into immortality, they no longer have micro expressions and have like... crazy control over their facial muscles - so it kinda freaks out the ninjas, because the only emotions they can see is exactly what scumplane want them to see (SJ - disgust, usually. SQH - cowardice/flattery)

Scumplane also have 0 sense of danger when it comes to shinobi - they're immortals and old (lets say this is an indetermined amount of time after canon wraps up) so things like mundane steel and mortal poisons mean nothing to them when theyre so old. They also don't even bother holding back their tongues because what can these mortals even do to them? Worse comes to worse, they just seal up the worlds again, or just wait out for all these mortals to die (a strategy they use for troublesome emperors or politicians).

They also bring their disciples (Ming Fan specifically because I want him to have a redemption) and after canon had wrapped up the PIDW's story finished, everyone in the world actually bounced back into their rightful places (e.g. MF suddenly got a second puberty, his face improved to be beautiful as it should be and his intelligence returned to the level that the head disciple of the scholarly peak should be).

I want it to be during Minato hokage's short, short tenure - Minato is 23, a war hero and recently hired as ninja president, Konoha just came out of a war and suddenly the daimyo is paying WELL and hiring for the best teams of Konoha to escort these foreigners who are so otherwordly beautiful and so otherworldly RICH, like, the material of the clothes they wear puts the daimyos court to shame, they can pay in pure gold and stones thrumming with power.

SJ's whole thing is like... based on image. So imagine SQH bowing and being like 'ooh thank you for your hospitality' and SJ just grabbing him by the back of his collar and hauling him up like 'wtf dont even bother bowing to this guy. Have some face. he's only got the same rank as you AND he's a fucking child.'

(He's figured that Daimyo = weak emperor-ish, because what kind of a emperor only has control of such a small land AND has others in nearby lands with the same, competing title????. Hokage & Konoha is like the sects, and all the peak lords of CQS are of the same rank as a sect leader. Of course, they all defer to YQY officially, but tbh all the peaks run like their own individual sects, and SJ has never allowed himself to act below YQY in rank)

During Minato's reign, Orochimaru is still a loyal Konoha shinobi.... his interest in immortals makes him soooooo crazy invested in them....

SJ looks at Orochimaru who's questioning him on immortality and is like, 'out of all these people, you are the closest. Your mind is too unstable, however (ironic, coming from SJ) and you still cling too tightly to the material world. Abandon all worldly matters and immortality may be in your grasp, if the heavens deign it so.' acting like he's a good teacher or something, while SQH is in the background, the voice of reason like 'SHIXIONG WTF!!! WE'RE NOTT SUPPOSED TO BE GIVING UP THE SECRET TO IMMORTALITY TO THE MORTALS OF THE FORBIDDEN REALM????'

Maybe SQH does know they're in the naruto world, and knows what naruto is, (hc that the water walking we see YQY do in the donghua was ripped off from naruto, when SQH was still writing PIDW) but it's been like 200+ years! He can't remember shit!!! This is all new information to him!

[sagisbrainrot]

bingliushen is TOO good like this is a ship for the PEOPLE! shen yuan thinking that binghe will have the harem when the whole time it's him having 2 of the strongest men crying and begging for his attention, who would willingly be on their knees and worship him without a second thought, willing to put aside their differences and realize their two sides of the same coin who want nothing but their shixiong's/shizun's happiness...

not everyone will understand get it but I do!!!

[shentheauthor]

Sometimes I forget that people dislike characters because they’re bad people

[everytimewetouch-dot-mp3]

guardian spirit shen yuan attaches to lbh about a year after he joins cqms, and a lot of his missions are just keep binghe alive.’ he thinks, of course, that this is bullshit bc it’s not like lbh could die anyway; he’s the protagonist.

sy fails to realize that he is basically the ‘binghe can’t die’ part of the protagonist halo

[allpiesforourown]

if binghe didn’t exist what would you think of jiuyuan / liushen just curious !!!

JIUYUAN AND LIUSHEN TRUTHERS RISE UP!!

I've said before that one of the things that make Shen Yuan so loveable is how complex he is. That well-roundedness makes him easily compliment many different characters.

Liushen is simple and has a classic charm. A modern, playful young man teasing his easily flustered, old fashioned shidi. Liu Qingge protecting Shen Yuan like a knight in shining armour every chance he gets. The way they're both oblivious to their feelings, but care for each other. It's very cute and pure in a way. It's like a story book yearning romance.

Now as for Jiuyuan... it might be my favourite svsss ship after Bingqiu/Binggeyuan.

One thing I really love about svsss is how it critiques kindness with circumstance. For example, people forget that the only reason Shen Jiu was ever captured by Qiu Jianluo was because he saved another beggar child.

This combined with him trying to save Liu Qingge and being accused of his murder means Shen Jiu has been proven the same lesson over and over and over: being kind and helping people will always be his downfall. No one has ever appreciated any of his efforts to be a good person.

Then we have Shen Yuan, who is the exact opposite: while Liu Qingge was Shen Jiu's downfall, Shen Yuan's attempt to save him earned him Qingge's loyalty and he got someone who would always defend him.

Now imagine, someone like Shen Jiu who's hated by everyone for being selfish and cruel, hiding how badly he wants to be selfless and good, meeting Shen Yuan, someone who is universally beloved.

Shen Jiu would HATE Shen Yuan. If he thought he hated Binghe for having everything he never did, imagine his reaction to someone like this. Someone who had a big family he was close with, someone who never had any worries because he was born rich, someone who can be kind and be rewarded for it. He would want Shen Yuan DEAD.

But Shen Yuan is the type of person who can't hate anyone. Oh, he'll pretend to. He'll yell at Shang Qinghua all day, then let him into his home to have dinner together. He even felt bad for Zhuzhi-Lang's passing after all the shit he put Shen Yuan through. He'd see Shen Jiu's hatred and just go, "Yikes! I better steer clear! But also, I'm kind of curious as to what his deal is... you know, mending plot holes..."

Shen Yuan thought Bingmei wanted to rip his limbs off, but managed to look at his actions and realize Binghe just wanted to be loved. As oblivious as he is, he is the only person who will give people a second chance and try to help them. If there is anyone who could care about Shen Jiu and see past the cold appearance and into the hurt boy, it would be him.

TLDR: to answer your question, yes. I like Liushen and Jiuyuan very much.

[cumplanecrash]

Shizun Babies update, but I also wanna try doing WIP Wednesday so you get a way earlier update. About another 500 words, the conclusion of the previous scene. Shen Yuan Fucks Up™

🔗 just the updates | memes and updates | first | prev ← did you miss it? I tried posting on Saturday this time.

"Right," Shen Jiu said slowly, hand under his chin as he thought. "I think Return to Childhood might be a qi deviation Huan Hua seniors get pretty often? I don't know much about it, to be honest, my sources on that aren't exactly cultivators themselves."

No, paranoia would drive Shen Yuan unnecessarily insane. So, presuming Shen Jiu was sharing everything he knew, Shen Yuan would do the same. Err, the relevant bits. "Proud Immortal Demon Way is told from an omniscient point of view, so as long as we don't mention anything that's forbidden, we don't necessarily need an audience, but it'd probably help to get the named characters involved -- Luo Binghe, Ning Yingying, Ming Fan, maybe get Liu Mingyan up here somehow?"

Shen Yuan turned his head down to face a blinking Shen Jiu. "So," Shen Jiu said slowly. "When the System calls Luo Binghe 'the Protagonist'..."

Ah. Fuck .

Shen Yuan nodded. "In the early arcs, he's the one that all the whump happens to, and then when it goes from Torture Porn to Revenge Porn to just Porn, he's the one inflicting poetic justice and marrying calamitous beauties by the hundreds."

Shen Jiu mouthed the words 'torture porn', horror on his face.

Look, okay? Sorry to everyone involved, but Shen Yuan had been trying to workshop how to nail down those bonus points, since he couldn't be sure how much time they'd have alone together. He'd kind of forgotten that Shen Jiu didn't have the same World Knowledge the System had, alright??

"So in this book," Shen Jiu said, rubbing his temples in the way of someone who already had a headache that was about to get worse. "Shen Qingqiu is...?"

No point in sugarcoating it. "The principal villain of the first arc."

"The torture porn arc," said Shen Jiu.

"The first of three torture porn arcs," said Shen Yuan, in all fairness. "And the Endless Abyss is by far the worst of them, Binghe would have died several times if it weren't for certain artifacts that this master would really rather have available later on!!"

"During the revenge porn arcs." Shen Jiu said before falling to his knees, clearly on the verge of huge toddler tears. "Plural, because one of them is just me, isn't it?"

That... isn't something Shen Yuan wants to think about with the emotional regulation of a toddler, much less describe to another, already distressed, toddler. "I... don't believe in spoilers?"

Shen Jiu looked at Shen Yuan.

Shen Yuan looked at Shen Jiu.

They both took off running at the same time, Shen Yuan screaming fearfully, Shen Jiu screaming angrily.

Their combined screams reached a peak above what the privacy wards were prepared to deal with, and both Shens Qingqiu yelped in surprise as the door burst open in that same instant.

"Xiao Jiu?!?" shouted the Sect Leader, drawing talismans from a pocket as he surveyed the scene.

Shen Jiu eeped again, and ducked behind Shen Yuan.

Next

[konjiang]

I was drunk at an event, and I want to write a tianshang au where SQH is the bartender and TLJ is a customer flirting with him.

--

It was LBH/SY'S wedding and SQH being SY's best man (and only friend) offered to be bartender for free. He clearly underestimated the amount of people who were at the wedding and ended up swamped by people after the ceremony was finished.

The night was coming to an end, and SQH was glad for it to be over. As he expected, the newlyweds disappeared right after the ceremony, leaving him alone with a swarm of people. He earned a lot of tips so he couldn't complain much. SQH started to clean and pack everything up, and the only thing left were the annoying light decorations the wedding designer insisted on adding.

Before SQH could take them off, a guy with bouncy curls and an amazing chest, not that he was looking or anything, walked over and leaned on the counter. It wasn't uncommon for people to come by the bar after it was close, so SQH already had lines and script ready for this situation. He opened his mouth but quickly shut it because looking into the guy's red eyes suddenly made his mouth really dry, and he had to control the urge to lick his lips.

“Hi, I would like to place an order to take back to my hotel room. Are you on the menu tonight?” The guy said as he smiled, showing off his sharp canines. SQH stared at him as the guy took out a piece of paper. SQH wasn't sure he heard him correctly. It was true that bartenders get hit on a lot, but it was usually by drunk customers and towards attractive bartenders. He would have remembered him if he came up tonight. There was no way SQH would forget a face like that, so the guy shouldn't be drunk. He never knew how attractive rings on a hand could be until tonight. Just the thought of what else that hand could do sends a shiver down his body.

“If you are…mind if I get it delivered to my hotel room.” The guy leaned over the counter and placed a light kiss right next to his lips before sliding the paper to SQH. His ears pulsed with his heartbeat as he stared at the tall figure disappear into the crowd. His brain lagged behind and had just now caught up with whatever fuckery that happened.

‘Omg omg, this can't be happening!’ SQH thought as he looked down at the paper with a hotel room number. That was when he noticed on the opposite side of the counter where the guy was sitting was the ring.

There were so many reasons NOT to do this. SQH picked up the ring and put it in his pocket to give it back to the guy.

‘I'm just returning the ring, nothing else.’ SQH finished closing as he walked out the venue inside the hotel and into the elevator to the hotel rooms.

‘Wait. Shower’ SQH quickly crumbled that thought up and threw it in the trash. He was going there to return a ring and nothing else.

That was why he walked out of his hotel room 20 minutes later with slightly damp hair and a different set of clothes. He quickly located the hotel room, and he began having second thoughts.

SQH was nothing but a coward. After standing at the door for a couple minutes, he turned away intending to leave the ring at the front desk, but before he could even take a step, the door swung open and he was pulled into the hotel room with the door slamming shut behind him.

“Where do you think you're going?”

--

And that's all for now :)