#since i have been a prolific blog on tumblr for years

[wolveria]

With how incredibly cruel people can be in fandoms nowadays, I can understand the lack of interaction on tumblr.

I know it's well meaning, but I have a feeling folks who say "people who boop can also interact directly with blogs!" have never been sent hate mail, or received nasty comments, or been put on a list that gets passed around because they ship/write/draw the "wrong" thing.

SO yeah. The lack of interaction isn't what's killing fandoms. It's the people who go out of their way to harass other fans that leads to less interaction that kills fandoms.

And it's not really fair to expect people to interact in a hostile environment.

[relax-and-read-on]

2024, Hello!

What a year it has been, right?

I usually try to talk only about warhammer 40k on this blog. I don't like mention if my personal life, or politics, or even other fandom, really. That said, this year was... Far from easy for me. Health problem, job problem, finances, politiques, (shout out to all the queer french canadian who are also scared shitless!), moving in a new place, insane inflation....

I had given myself the huge objective to publish 200k words for 2023. At the end, this is the result:

108k words. You can also add about 50k of unpublished original work. Here is the list of fic that I have published/updated in 2023 (by view count), and some little thought/insight on them:

Agency - My big fem primarch au. You can really see me grow, if you read it from start to finish. It's been *years* since I started this fic, at this point, the ending that I have planned is like my white whale. One day.... One day, I will defeat it. Terribly hard to write but SO satisfying

Tales of different lives - if Agency is my dark nemesis, than my planet swap is coming home to a soft bed. It's so easy and FUN to write that au. I know not everyone like the lighter take toward the world this one take, and that's ok. Sometime... It's just nice, to have softer things, especially after such a year.

Phantom of the (warhammer?)-pera - I am begging you. On my knees. Read this one. It's my fav thing I have ever written. It's so much fun. It's totally INSANE and I loved every moment of it. I want to go back and fight the formatting again, to finish implanting all the notes. They are SO much fun. Also has AMAZING cover art by @skrankku !

Five times People tried and failed to Seduce Roboute Guilliman to Chaos... - Absolute surprised to me how people loved that fic. Ngl, I was actually sick/very depressed when I wrote it, but it warm heart that other enjoyed it.

This Once Nearly Was Mine - This one does not count, it's @kingwithpaintedfingers AMAZING Vulkan's POV to Castle of Glass, my Mortarion/Vulkan soulmate au. I am amazed and humbled to be able to work with such a great writer, and be able to call you a friend. I HIGHLY recommend all their work.

Trust - I had to actually check that one, and turns out, it was the update to my Talos/Septimus fic! Can you believe that I forget my own fic?! I am silly. Surprisingly delightful. I need to write more of this ship.

Birdcage - written for an exchange, specifically for @funboxsupreme , another criminally good writer. This fic, in my humble opinion, is some of my best writing. Extremely dark, I also SOMEHOW managed some really cool "special effect" in it, and I am PLEASED with myself.

In the Garden - a VERY quick and horny piece for Nan, a PROLIFIC writer whom I cannot help but be in awe of (also heeeelp I don't have your tumblr, poke me and I will tag you!)

Old Crows and Young Cardinals - This is an interesting one! This fic seem barely started, but it's mostly because the rest of it require MASSIVE planning and careful writing, as it deal with time travel and has a stupidly complex plot. I cannot wait to unveil more of it.

By proxy - hehehe, another really cool gift for a friend, this time for Lieara/Allyria! Even if this list is making me realise how many of yall tumblrs I don't know. I feel like an Old man trying to remember phone number lmao.

Day 2 - Bootworship and Sister of battle - a fun little fic part of the "40 kink for 40k" challenge that I NEED to continue, started by the wonderful @iapetusneume . Also.... Lesbian. Need more Lesbian.

The only way - A other fic that I had completely forgotten that I wrote. It's such a strange feeling, to reread your own words and go "I did this??" It's not bad, but it was written during one of those hard period of the year, and as such feel extra alien to me.

Day 1 - Geneseed, but sexy and Homeworld - another 40k for 40 kink fic, this one was a LOT of fun to write! Amd kinda specifically made for @bobthebobhere , another good friend in this fandom!

The miracle of science (and children) - a gift fic that was supose to be part of an exchange, but took too long! This one is for @shootertron-stuff , an artist that I highly respect and love! If you like it kinky, go tead their stuff, they are an inspiration.

In the Lion's Den. - Hahahahahaha lmao. So, fun fact: On reddit, there is a user who post horribly misogynist/homophobic Tau torture porn with his OC chapter. I got mad, and wrote a spit gay porn fic of his OCs. To his credit, he rolled with it and was amused at it. I still don't like him, and never will, but I have his blessing to keep it up, so!

The Bird, The Wolf and the Keeper - a little experiment, in poetry format fic. I liked it well enough, and will attempt some more in 2024 I think :)

(A secret fic exchange, yet to be revealed)

(another one!)

So.... 18 fics total. I think there should be pride in that. I like the variety of them, even if I want to push out more, do more unique and stranger fic, for 2024. It was a difficult year, but creating so much made it easier, made it more worth it. I am... Happy, with it all.

If you have questions about my fics, now is the time! Otherwise, I will see you soon, with more writing, and more joy in sharing.

I wish you all a wonderful year 2024, better than the last, safety, comfort, and peace. May we all had fun in this fandom!

[distilled-prose]

April 21, 2023

Those of you who follow all my blogs know this past summer I fell under a kind of enchantment while out at the sunstone mine. Early on when I went to town, an hour and a half away from the mine, to pick up supplies for the week, I stopped in the local library. I was only going to use their internet to catch up on email, check Tumblr, and then head back out. But the books distracted me. So I bought an out of area library card, checked out five books and took them back to camp with me. I read all five before the next week's foray back into town and repeated the process. I was reading four or five books, sometimes six books a week. "Enchantment" is really too light a word for what I felt. It was a spell, an out of body experience where I fell into the pages I was holding. I read mysteries, suspense, poetry, history, historical novels, biographies. I couldn't stop. I read more at the mine last summer than I had ever read anywhere else, not just during the season, but for any whole year, any whole group of years. It was delightful. Most of what I selected I read completely through. I do tend to be a bit obsessive/compulsive. But a few of the books I could not force myself through, though they were relatively few and very far between. Of course, I developed a group of favorite authors. And since I've been home I continue to check out books by those authors whenever I go to the library, although I do sample new authors every week. One of my early on favorites, a quite prolific author, did an eight book series that completely took me by surprise. I only found this series in the last two weeks, and have read four of the eight books. So now I am left with a dilemma: Do I get the last four books over the next few weeks and finish the series, or do I just get one per week, or maybe even one every other week? I am actually afraid/sad/disinclined (right words?) to reach the end. And as I was driving my daughter to her job late this morning, passing the multitude of greens on an undeveloped stretch of highway, the crazy variety of greens that astonish me every spring, I realized my life is kind of the same way. I want spring and then summer to never fade. I want autumn to hold me just a tad longer. Winter I struggle through, but even she has her moments. I want to have a little more time as a six or seven year old. I want the summer of my fourteenth birthday to come back for just a bit longer. I want the amazement that came in college of learning something so wonderful I offered up a spontaneous prayer of thanksgiving for the opportunity. If I could only hold my children as little babies for one more time... You get the idea. And at this moment I have no admonition for you, no suggestion for your life or how to get the most out of it. I am just humbled that you let me talk to you here. And I appreciate it more than I can ever describe.

[nighttime-tea-party]

soooo idk who else to ask but like what happened to all the big names during the sebaciel renaissance?? I’ve kinda been off tumble pretty much since nsfw ban, but what happened to blogs like chromehopelite and ciel’s lingerire or vexing young master? Im sure there’s others I’m missing I just can’t remember but I feel like no one uploads on the sebaciel ao3 tag as much as it used to in like 2017 and 2018. hopefully the fandom will come alive again with a new season?

Hello! I have no idea what happened to Vexing Young Master but as for the others, as far as I know, Ciels Lingerie got obliterated again and again, both here and on twitter, and I guess at one point they gave up. Their latest twitter seems to have been hacked by crypto bros.

Chromehoplite is still around, just not in the fandom anymore. And who can blame them, considering the amount of vile messages they got on a daily basis.

To be honest, I've been active in the tumblr fandom for... Idk how long, before BoC, and it was the most prolific back when BoC aired. After that, it's been a downward spiral. It got a bit refreshment through BoM and BotA but not in the same way. Back during BoM, the fandom felt huge.

I think it's a natural development. Manga fandoms are most active when there's a fairly recent tv anime adaptation (movies just don't do it like tv shows). There hasn't been one in a long time, and additionally, we've had to put up with our main characters virtually missing from the manga for about half a decade now. The twin reveal was that long ago!

So I completely understand that the fandom has become the way it is now. I consider myself crazy for still sticking around the way I do (but I have no plans of changing that) but most people aren't as weird about Kuroshitsuji as I am.

That being said, I also believe that the fandom will have a real renaissance when the show airs again. I never expected that twitter-borne renaissance to hold on anyway because it was mostly just born out of spite against antis (which is valid but not enough to give people the motivation to stick with a manga that's barely progressing over the course of years). Chrome and the others were there before the twitter renaissance and they were there after it too to some extent, but I guess lives go on, priorities and interests change and also, fandom can just be really nasty and detrimental to your mental health sometimes.

Maybe we'll see some familiar people come back when the new show airs, who knows!

I hope my answer helped!

P.S.: from the perspective of a creator myself, the disappearance of popular creators coincides with a strong decrease of engagement with authors' and artists' works. You could say it's a hen and egg kind of situation but I think the common denominator is the lack of progress in the manga and everyone's fatigue with everything. In any case, from a creator's POV it does feel kind of discouraging sometimes when you feel like your skill has increased over time but people don't interact with it as much as they used to. Like, I know it's the size of the fandom but I sometimes think, "has my art gotten that bad?" and I mean I don't draw for attention or else I'd draw Genshin or sth like that but it is a little difficult to process anyway. Sorry for the rant.

[hafanforever]

Hey everybody! It's my 10 year anniversary on Tumblr 😁😄🥳🎉🎊

I can't believe my Tumblr blog is now ten years old! I first created it mostly to reblog content from animated Disney movies I liked, mostly Brave, which was my current interest at the time. But I also knew that Frozen was coming to out that year, and I was hoping to begin reblogging content for that once it came out.

However, I didn't anticipate that I would end up loving Frozen so much more than I originally anticipated that I would be devoting my Tumblr blog primarily to that movie for years to come! 😁😁😁 I didn't begin writing analyses for it until six months after its release, and I didn't even begin making gifs for it by the time it had expanded to a franchise with its shorts of Frozen Fever and Olaf's Frozen Adventure.

But by the time the full length sequel Frozen II came out in 2019, I had established myself as one of the most prolific writers and gif makers within the Frozen fandom through my Tumblr, and had earned hundreds of followers and lots of friends who were also fans of this movie series. People have praised me for my writings, which has expanded to other Disney media, and others have said I have been a big inspiration to them. 😁😄😉

Unfortunately, I have been a lot less active for much of this year because I have been continuously trying to grow and expand my YouTube channel, which I created back in 2007, but had never used for posting videos, by making walkthroughs of my favorite childhood computer games, such as Nancy Drew, Carmen Sandiego, and Harry Potter. Still, I got a notice today that it is my tenth anniversary of my Tumblr, so I wanted to submit this to share it and my history of being on the site.

Thank you to all my friends on here who have enjoyed my works since I started my Tumblr, whether you were on Tumblr yourself or not. Happy ten years of my Tumblr! 😁😄🥳🎉🎊

[papirouge]

@not-your-average-prolifer

I totally understand why you deactivated the reblogs and I PROMISE I will deactivate mine if my post attract other weirdos (btw, the person who cussed you is a literal Israel/Tsahal worship blog so you really shouldn't take anything they say seriously)

BUT this hysterical reaction made me realize one thing

Since we're on Tumblr, all of us probably seen the post floating every 9/11 mourning the victims of the US retaliation in Irak but also many other middle east countries for the next following years later

Hardly anyone on the notes of those post has the audacity to be like "so you condone the attack on the world trade center??" "You defend islamists ??"

But when the people make the same kind of post, mourning the CIVILIAN cost on Palestine, it's IMPOSSIBLE to not have someone inquiring OP to give their opinion on Hamas and condemn them.

The funny thing is, I once had an exchange with a zionist thinking they were doing something compelling me to condemn Hamas. I did. Because the "I'm against attacking civilians" statement isn't a prerogative to Palestinians. Then I asked them "and you? do you condemn Israel terror on Palestine for the last few weeks?"

That person has never been able to condemn Israel. And the discussion ended.

That's why I advise anyone to take not seriously any of those people, because they expect from anyone a moral righteousness that they themselves are unable to live up for.

One thing that I noticed is that pro Israel are legitimately confused by people advocating for Palestine civilians being ALSO against Hamas. Their brain kinda freeze and resort to other tactics to villainize you anything ("you still hate Jews for not supporting israel" "you're leftist paving the way for Hamas " etc etc) to not lose face. Because God forbid someone defending the life of civilians isn't also an antisemite ¯⁠\⁠_⁠(⁠ツ⁠)⁠_⁠/⁠¯

[hanzajesthanza]

Hello! I have been a fan of the series for a few years now. I am currently on my second read of the books and I have played the games 1 and 3 extensively.

Throughout this time I had never really interacted with the community and I have to ask how can you handle all the bigotry?

Simply going on witcher themed subreddits and typing the words "racism" or "diversity" left me dumbfounded. From people ignoring Sapkowski's interview in which he said racial changes are fine, to people trying to flat out justify irl racism...

I get the arguments from people that wanted more Slavic representation in the show and other witcher media like it. I get the people saying they wanted it to feel Eastern European while presenting other cultures through things like Zerrikania or Zangwebar but I find that those arguments, even if they are in good faith, are often accompanied by phrases like "blacks don't belong in The Witcher".

How do you handle things like this? I am so disappointed...

this ask comes at an interesting time, as i've also begun to use reddit more frequently for r/wiedzmin and r/witcher (began lurking in r/wiedzmin around 2019, and have begun to actually post and use the app in recent months). i don't really have "tips" to share, but i have my own experiences.

reddit as a site

first thing's first, as a tour around, because not all tumblr users like to also use other social media sites, particularly reddit, so they may be unfamiliar with how the witcher fandom works on reddit:

r/wiedzmin is the discussion sub for analysis and "deeper" conversations (and one of my favorite places to hang out!), and the canon is mostly books canon/occassional games canon.

r/witcher is the main sub, for all canons, books, games, netflix, etc. - but mainly, games and netflix.

r/wiedzmin has a lot less people subscribed to it than r/witcher (though in the past couple of months, r/wiedzmin did just hit 20,000 subs!).

and, on reddit, tumblr, and racism:

i'm not singling out reddit as the only site, or the most prolific site where racism occurs online, especially since racism takes MANY forms; however, in my experience, i have seen more overt racism on reddit and more covert racism on tumblr. on reddit, racist attitudes tend to be more upfront and direct (such as the comments you mentioned) whereas on tumblr, i've seen racist attitudes expressed and then covered up, explained away, or just unrecognized and unacknowledged as being legitimately racist.

racism DEFINITELY occurs on tumblr, and it occurs right under your nose - so i'm not saying that tumblr communities AREN'T racist. rather, what i am saying is that i have personally encountered more overt racism on reddit.

it also matters how tumblr and reddit are structurally set up which affects how opinions are shared and seen.

reddit also has less of "cult of personality" that tumblr does - you can follow people, you can DM people, but it's not like a tumblr dashboard in which you only see posts from people you follow. rather, on your homepage, you see posts from communities you follow - subreddits.

on reddit, you don't reblog posts to your own blog which your followers will see. instead, you can make a post for a specific subreddit, comment on an already-existing post, and upvote or downvote comments on posts.

i like this forum-like structure in many ways, because it contributes to discussion way more than tumblr does - posts can be threads, where discussion about one topic will always be in the same place with all comments about it underneath the topic - unlike tumblr, where you only see the version of the post which appears on your dash, reblog chains exist, and you can only see the full discussion if you look in the notes.

however, i think this structure also contributes to racist attitudes being shared and proliferating on reddit. because it's not such a "cult of personality," you don't have to follow somebody to see their opinions on a post. plus, upvoting and downvoting is pretty anonymous, and if you see a comment which has a lot of upvotes, there's no way to tell who upvoted or downvoted. therefore, racist attitudes can appear near the top of the post, showing that they are "agreed with"... pretty much anonymously. if a racist comment gets 100 upvotes, not all 100 people sharing racist beliefs who upvoted it had to individually reblog the post to their blog, or make their own posts. they could anonymously and casually upvote for that comment. and that culture of convenience around upvoting/downvoting, i think, leads to a lot of bigoted opinions being "agreed with," because while someone might be aware that this is a stupid racist opinion that someone would roast them for if they said on their own, individually, there's no consequences to upvoting the racist opinion that someone else posted. and since racism is shared among cowards, the anonymity and casual ability of it makes it easy for racist posts and comments to get support.

why do i talk about how the site functions? because it affects which kinds of opinions surface and get "agreed with", and what you will see as a user of the site.

moderation on witcher subreddits

one thing i will say is that i've seen the mods of both r/wiedzmin and r/witcher in comments of posts saying that they do not condone racism and will remove racist posts they see, but the subs are very big and they can't mod 24/7. so, while this may be true, in practice, i have not always seen this enforced - though i have seen rules enforced and posts deleted, i have also seen rules not enforced and posts and comments... not deleted.

could mods do more? of course. but it's more than the mods' responsibility to take down racist posts, it's more the community's responsibility to... not be fucking racist. so i won't be digging into the mods of these subs, since i just basically don't know enough about them, how they moderate the subs, or their personal beliefs and attitudes, and i'd rather not talk about stuff that i have no idea about.

i will say that i've seen r/wiedzmin mods generally be pretty decent (both in their own opinions they share on posts, and also in the sense of modding the sub - their attitude seems to be like, we want discussion and conversations, so we are against whatever hinders that goal).

i haven't seen r/witcher mods around as much, but i did pop into the r/witcher discord once and... um... (it was full of n*zi memes... jfc). however that was in 2019 and i just saw a comment from a r/witcher mod on a post yesterday in the sub saying that they don't condone racism and will delete any racist posts/comments they see, so maybe attitudes differ amongst mods or... again, it's up to speculation, this is just what i've seen.

this precursor to this post took way too much time, but i want to provide context for using reddit and the witcher subreddits, if people are unfamiliar with it. it's both good and bad, it's kind of better than i expected, but still has unsavory parts. and again, tumblr isn't innocent either...

dealing with racism

now to talk about the actual topic, for starters, i feel what you're saying. i've seen racist attitudes in the witcher fandom on both tumblr and reddit.

there's two situations in which i've mainly seen racism in the witcher fandom: 1. people saying racist slander against netflix, and 2. people assuming that all book fans are white, cishet, etc... these two attitudes come from the same presumption that the books are a white-only space, which... obviously... isn't the case...

my method for dealing with the first issue (what you've described above, the hateful kinds of comments flat-out saying that people of color don't belong in the witcher) is to block and report. i don't engage, i just block, because there's no discussion to be had, and i know that engaging with them could actually put me in danger (doxxing, for example).

dealing with racism (emotionally)

however, this ability to block doesn't change the emotional impact of seeing these comments. i think anyone would be disturbed by these kinds of comments, and there's also times when it hits a little more personally.

for example, when the casting for milva was released, even comments which i saw on r/wiedzmin (generally... the less-racist of the two subs...) were upset because of meng'er zhang being chinese. (for context, i am half-chinese and half-white). there were a lot of comments expressing exasperation, skepticism, and the general attitude of "no WAY that there would EVER be an east asian person in the WITCHER" ... yeah...

i've got to say, it makes me less encouraged to participate in the witcher fandom, particularly in circumstances where that participation involves me showing my face online (my poor little youtube channel with one video... i'll come back to you soon!).

so, yeah. there's that element of slimy revulsion and disgusting fear and shame. i'll acknowledge it. and there's no instant solution for it.

community as healing

what has helped me is participating in spaces that are publically diverse and deliberately anti-racist, such as in my own circle of mututals and in my our discord server. it's helped a lot to speak with fans of color, lgbt fans, disabled fans, neurodivergent fans, etc., as well as allied fans, about these attitudes - but not only that, to just exist in the same spaces with them. our conversations aren't all-of-the-time about race, unless the topic comes up, but we're just having discussions and sharing thoughts, headcanons, memes, art, etc. to know that the book fandom includes these people, and myself, is all the encouragement i need to stay active in the community.

the simple existence of me and my friends disproves the rhetoric spread by people saying that the witcher is a white-only space (which, by the way, i've also heard from netflix fans on tumblr). that's just a straight-up lie :'). we're just going to continue enjoying and discussing the books while simultaneously existing as ourselves because there's no other way to exist. nothing much more to say about that.

though i will say it's funny that white twn fans think that people of color can't possibly read books and be fans of them... how do you not recognize that as a hugely bigoted assumption?!

further posting

this post was about the fandom and existing in the fandom as a fan of color. i haven't touched on how the book series itself or its 'adaptations' deals with race, sapkowski's opinions, etc. i've saved these topics for another time. here are some posts about this on my sideblog, if it interests you:

how twn plays into white supremacist rhetoric: "1/2 TWN has uncovered an interesting problem (...)"

design of twn: "“hey, we are adapting got the rights to a polish series and there’s this short story that takes place in farmland and fields reminiscent of the polish countryside, (...) where should we film this scene?” ... “ive got it! … new zealand!”" | everyone and everywhere looks the same (grey, uninteresting, featureless) because of their design decisions. + orientalism in twn's costume design

xenophobia of twn: polish identity of the witcher and why it matters

representation for women and people of color: "i’m not willing to accept offensive trash that demeans marginalized groups as “representation”" | this post lol

antiblackness of twn: netflix whitewashing mecia simson (francesca) | "lauren responded to a black fan’s concerns about antiblack violence with “thanks for your feedback” and no further explanation, thought, or consideration."

the messages of the books: "if people believe the point which the books make is “neutrality is good, always be neutral!” then they either have poor reading comprehension, or didn’t read at all (...)" | the "cynical fantasy" of sapkowski | garfield meme

[rubyvroom]

I posted 2,656 times in 2022

That's 740 more posts than 2021!

165 posts created (6%)

2,491 posts reblogged (94%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@princessbuttercup1987

@heywizards

@alemongrenade

@radicalcatgirlanarchy

@it-may-be-dull-but-im-determined

I tagged 1,265 of my posts in 2022

#creepy queue - 118 posts

#the locked tomb - 57 posts

#horror - 55 posts

#music posts - 40 posts

#travel queue - 37 posts

#useful posts - 11 posts

#best of 2022 queue - 11 posts

#comics - 11 posts

#abuse tw - 10 posts

#same - 9 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#for a second i thought you were saying gideon/harrow isn't fraught & i was about to launch myself into space propelled entirely by laughter

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

See the full post

208 notes - Posted February 22, 2022

#4

See the full post

681 notes - Posted April 26, 2022

#3

Another awesome thing about Everything Everywhere All at Once is a nice meaty role for the iconic James Hong. You know the guy. The most That Guy of all That Guys.

He’s the most prolific character actor of all time, probably. James Hong has more than 500 acting credits. FIVE HUNDRED. He’s been acting since 1954 in TV and Films. He appeared on basically every 70′s TV show and a lot of the early 80′s, and appeared in many many major films over the years. Generally he gets real small but memorable roles. Here’s a few:

See the full post

3,746 notes - Posted April 25, 2022

#2

Stray is giving me a better understanding of cat behavior for sure.

I already found the clue I needed but I’m going to proceed to knock the rest of the pictures off this wall anyway, you understand. 

Knocking bottles off shelves is very satisfying but also? on general principle? they were in my way, and now they’re not.

I will use the scratch option anywhere i can just to see what happens.  

Is tripping people walking by an achievement? I’m gonna do it anyway.

Sorry Momo I’ll be there in just a sec but I found a jingle ball and I have to play with it right now immediately. It’s very important. 

WHY will nobody PET me???? :(

I’m a hyper-intelligent evolved cat who can understand speech and make complex plans, but I’m going to fail to evolve any new behaviors and continue to meow and act exactly like a housecat anyway. Why improve on perfection!

9,561 notes - Posted July 28, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

28,444 notes - Posted July 22, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

I'll have to do a proper top posts sometime but this isn't bad.

[firondoiel]

I posted 1,652 times in 2022

29 posts created (2%)

1,623 posts reblogged (98%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@riley1cannon

@wrennette

@rocktheholygrail

@badrituals

@letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

I tagged 1,636 of my posts in 2022

Only 1% of my posts had no tags

#fanart - 291 posts

#obi wan kenobi - 180 posts

#quiobi - 160 posts

#hannibal - 138 posts

#kenobi series - 133 posts

#hannigram - 104 posts

#ewan mcgregor - 99 posts

#humor - 99 posts

#*jo march voice* women - 71 posts

#kenobi spoilers - 70 posts

Longest Tag: 121 characters

#when you stared too long into the darkness of the forest and it became bright and shining in your eyes and in your throat

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

Chapters: 4/? Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy Rating: Mature Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Qui-Gon Jinn/Obi-Wan Kenobi, Padmé Amidala/Anakin Skywalker Characters: Obi-Wan Kenobi, Qui-Gon Jinn, Padmé Amidala, Anakin Skywalker, Leia Organa, Luke Skywalker, Shmi Skywalker, Sheev Palpatine Additional Tags: Qui-Gon Jinn Lives, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Mutual Pining, Blood and Injury, Inspired by Persuasion, Art, QuiObi Big Bang 2022, QOBB 2022 Summary:

It has been eight years of long, lonely missions for Obi-Wan. Eight years since Anakin left the Order to be with Padmé. Eight years since Obi-Wan last saw Qui-Gon Jinn and ended their relationship.

When their paths unexpectedly cross again, will it lead to a deeper estrangement, or to a second chance?

————————

A Star Wars retelling of Jane Austen’s Persuasion

29 notes - Posted November 13, 2022

#4

Chapters: 1/1 Fandom: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply Relationships: Qui-Gon Jinn/Obi-Wan Kenobi Characters: Qui-Gon Jinn, Obi-Wan Kenobi Additional Tags: Alternate Universe - Regency, Regency Romance, Romance Summary:

It is a truth universally acknowledged that a wealthy widower must be in want of an eligible young man. Mr. Kenobi is a newcomer to the village, and Colonel Jinn has certainly taken no note of him.

35 notes - Posted January 2, 2022

#3

Summary: It has been eight years of long, lonely missions for Obi-Wan. Eight years since Anakin left the Order to be with Padmé. Eight years since Obi-Wan last saw Qui-Gon Jinn and ended their relationship.

When their paths unexpectedly cross again, will it lead to a deeper estrangement, or to a second chance?

The first chapter of my Star Wars/Persuasion AU written for the QuiObi Big Bang has been posted! The wonderfully perfect cover art was done by my team partner and friend @weillschmidtdoodles. Thank you! 

Thank you also to my dear @luvvewan​, who watched the 1995 film adaption of Persuasion just for me and provided her expert beta services for the fic!

@qobb2022​

42 notes - Posted September 25, 2022

#2

QuiObi Regency AU

Mr. Kenobi falls ill and has to stay in Colonel Jinn’s big, lonely house. They have longing finger touches over sexually charged tea and sweet, gentle forehead kisses.

-------

I am not the fastest or most prolific writer, so I have no idea if I’ll ever get around to writing another fic in this AU, but here’s a moodboard dug out of my drafts folder!

@eletainart @liyahayerst - thank you so much for the kind words! <3

48 notes - Posted July 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

I just think this photo of Liam Neeson needs more attention....

144 notes - Posted July 9, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[blackbutler-readerinsertsandjunk]

@strandedincivilisation said: Also, I will say this before stopping simply because currently social anxiety doesn't have me in a chokehold when it comes to interacting with others: I love reading, and writing, and while I have tried long, extensive RP kind of things before, and they are very satisfying and all, I could never get the courage and dedication to actually do what you do, tun a whole blog, write for people with so many different requests and takes, keep a certain consistency (1)

(obviously breaks,long as they need to be,are understandable and more than encourage and obviously allowed), but I just really admire you in that aspect! You've fleshed out characters so much, even ones with so little 'screentime' to the point you make terribly well-written and convincing backgrounds that make you feel for them. You should feel incredibly proud of yourself!

ok now I’m CONVINCED you’re trying to make me cry!! 😂

for real, like, ok... when I started on Tumblr back in like fucking 2012, I had no idea what the actual hell I was doing! I started with RP and ask blogs for my OCs... and funny as it is, I started with Black Butler stuff. (well, ok, I found Tumblr through a dirty confessions blog for a different fandom, BUT I STARTED MY OWN TUMBLR WITH BLACK BUTLER STUFF)

I’m pretty sure I’ve been running this blog for like nine years now and while I seem more organized... I still kinda have no idea what I’m doing! my writing and use of Tumblr tools like the queue and things have improved, but I’m still just sorta doing ~whatever~! XD

I have other blogs similar to this one for different fandoms (one for Undertale, My Hero Academia, and the Arrancars of Bleach), but I have to be honest...

none of my other blogs are nearly as prolific or well run or consistent as this one, even though I love the other series I write for too. even here I disappear for long stretches, but when I come back I’m usually quite active for several months. on other blogs, I might write and post one thing every few months, if that.

this blog and my tons of writing here and my passion is born of my love for the characters and the series, but the fact that this blog is so much bigger than my other ones I believe has a lot to do with the support I get here. people like you talk to me and encourage me and reblog my content and scream about our faves with me and send requests.

running this blog is such a joy for me, yes because I love writing these characters, but also because everyone here supports me and makes it such a happy, safe place for me. things are so great here, I want to spend time here and write requests and make shitposts and just, be here!

when I look at how big this blog has gotten, with over 300,000 words of content I’ve written since I started, HOLY SHIT THAT STILL BLOWS MY MIND, I’m proud of myself. but I also think all my followers should be proud of themselves too, including you, because you guys are a big reason why I’m still here running this blog!

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, there was a time I fell out of favor with the fandom and I was certain I would never come back to it in any fashion. but then something possessed me to come back here and think about trying again.

if I hadn’t received the outpouring of support I did with my initial return to this blog, and the support I’ve received every day since then, it’s more than likely I never would have rediscovered my love for this series.

so thank YOU, from the bottom of my heart. without sweethearts like you giving me kind words and encouragement, I don’t think I would still be here writing these characters. and these characters and this series are so very dear to me, I think I’d be missing out and have a hole in my life.

I GOT SO SAPPY BUT HONESTLY ALL I REALLY HAVE TO SAY IS THANK YOU, I SURE AM PROUD OF MYSELF, AND I’LL KEEP WORKING HARD TO MAKE YOU GUYS PROUD OF ME TOO!!! <3 <3 <3

[metalshea]

Examining Death through A Perfect Circle's "Blue" lens

Trigger Warning - this post discusses death, drug abuse, and overdoses, and includes a couple graphic descriptions from my time working at a morgue.  We are all at different places in our life journeys and have each been impacted by our own unique circumstances and experiences.  If these topics could spark difficult emotions for you, please do not feel compelled to read further.  Instead go gently and know that “there will come a day when the memory of those you’ve lost will bring a smile to your face before a tear to your eye”.

-- 

So it’s been a little shy of three years since my last post.  My last rant discussing the spindly and cancerous fingers of the NSBM scene through case examinations of Alcest, Behemoth, and Agalloch was all the way back in January of 2020.  In that time a lot has happened: a global pandemic led to my being laid off from my job in big tech, I started a great new job at a startup that has been nothing short of a trip, and, oh yeah, I HAD A KID. So yeah - career advancement plus guiding a small human on the path towards not being a shit head adult leaves little time for outside interests compared to less demanding jobs and… uhhh… not being a parent, I guess?  So something had to give somewhere.  Sorry Tumblr.  It’s not like I was a super prolific poster or that this blog ever went viral, so it’s probably fine, right?  Sorry to anyone that did read my stuff–the good news is you now have more words on a page to pour over from a now early-middle aged (holy shit when did that happen?) white dude that would have loved to have been a metal journalist.  While we're at it, sorry for that last post I did on A Perfect Circle… kind of, I guess… I mean I’m writing another post about them, right?  Anyway, I got super excited about what I imagined to be the parallels between the song “The Doomed” and Charles Dickens’ A Christmas Carol and kind of maybe went down a rabbit hole that was at the time super cathartic but, rereading it now, was probably a bit convoluted.

But here’s the thing, though, I absolutely LOVE A Perfect Circle.  They're near the top of a short list of artists who siginificantly impacted my development as both a person and musician, along with the likes of Metallica, Jimi Hendrix, Devin Townsend, and Zakk Wylde. When I first came across APC my musical tastes hadn’t yet expanded to the point where I had even heard of Tool, let alone knew who Maynard James Keenan was.  I remember first seeing an ad on either MTV or VH1 (probably both if we’re being honest) for Mer de Noms that had song snippets from “Judith” and I knew I had to get my hands on it.  Maynard’s screaming, biting: “Talk to Jesus Christ as if he knows the reason why” lyric immediately resonated with me: the kid of hyper-religious, conservative Catholic parents.  I had yet to start learning guitar at that point in my life, but the octaves that made up the main guitar melody were like nothing I had ever heard before in any other song.  When I finally scavenged up enough money to buy the CD, the coded letters that were all over the packaging became a new hieroglyphic language that allowed me to write my own hidden notes, and I practiced writing that code near daily.  I would go see APC live a few months later in what would be the first ever concert I would attend without an adult (just me and my closest friend on our own making bad decisions that night).  The ticket stub to that show is actually still taped to the wall of my parent’s basement along with all sorts of other music posters, guitar ads, and other random mementos from my preteen and teenage misadventures.  With Mer de Noms, APC hit that absolute sweet spot of atmosphere, melody, heaviness, avant garde, and mystery to absolutely captivate a young and ostracized adolescent that craved something esoteric to give him a sense of having stumbled upon something special.  Hell, if we really want to get into it–-and why not at this point?–opening up a CD case only to find a picture of the lingerie-clad ass of a smoking hot woman on the inner lining was enough to inspire a bit of a sexual awakening, too… Now that everyone is uncomfortable, I should probably mention that the music on Mer de Noms is freaking great.  That helped a lot.  Probably more than the other stuff. When APC dropped Thirteenth Step in 2003 I was beyond excited but when I actually listened to it, I was actually a bit disappointed.  It felt darker, bleaker.  I still listened to it on near constant repeat for months, but it made me feel uncomfortable, on edge, and put me into a place that made me start to feel the first twinges of what would become a lifelong battle with major depression.  Mer de Noms wasn’t exactly every day listening either–it had its own sense of melancholy and angst–but Thirteenth Step was just darker.  And it makes sense that it would be darker: Thirteenth Step is a concept album about overcoming drug abuse and flips between the first person perspective of both the junky and the junky’s loved ones.  It’s ambitious, but its heavy shit, man.  And in retrospect I’m not sure I had the life experience when it was released to really appreciate what the album was trying to accomplish, and how scary the picture it paints really is at times.

Earlier today I listened to the song “Blue” off Thirteenth Step for the first time in a couple years and it took me on a journey, inspiring a couple of very powerful flashbacks.  When I got out of graduate school I worked for a Medical Examiner’s office.  I actually worked the overnight shift at the morgue–which was an experience!  Part of my job involved performing autopsies, but most nights I was working scene dispatch, performing intake on bodies, cataloging and storing a decedent's belongings, and doing some evidence collection.  Occasionally, I would go out into the field to do recovery which saw me traveling across the state and bearing witness to the rawest forms of human agony, grief, curiosity and depravity first hand. My job as a mortuary and forensic technician lasted about two years before I jumped ship to the private sector, but it doesn’t take long for an environment like that to leave a freaking mark.  My time also coincided with the start of what the CDC calls the Second Wave of Opioid Overdose Deaths in 2010.  Constantly being forced to confront literal death on a daily basis as part of my profession shaped me in ways I think I’m still processing on an unconscious level, and being a “last responder” on the front lines of the then burgeoning Opioid Crisis certainly gave me a new perspective on the world around me.

“Blue” is the fourth song on Thirteenth Step.  At this point in the album’s storyline, the protagonist has acquired drugs to temporarily sate their addiction (“The Package”), realized their need for help (“Weak and Powerless”), and are starting to confront the resulting guilt and shame that nags at them (“The Noose”).  “Blue” reveals the source of that guilt and describes a memory where the protagonist witnessed a female companion overdosing.  Rather than helping, the protagonist watches with fascination while at the same time mentally tries to distance themselves from what is happening.  The protagonist doesn’t intervene and the implication is that the woman dies.  The lyrics are haunting--“I just didn’t want to know… She’s turning blue”--and the dense and dissonant atmosphere of the song lends itself well to supporting the hazy but all too raw memory.

There were two cases I worked while at the morgue that pull heavily on the threads of my own memories when listening to this song:  Myself and a colleague responded to an overdose in a public housing complex.  The apartment was far from what I’d call a home.  The furniture was spartan at best and was clearly either donated to the renter by well-meaning charities or purchased at thrift stores like Good Will or Salvation Army.  The renter was still in the house and was clearly still high–he sat on a couch in the living area off the small kitchen.  A police officer was talking with him when we arrived. The body of the victim was in the middle of the kitchen area.  Since the room was so intermittently furnished, the corpse might as well have been the centerpiece tying the two spaces together; a macabre coffee table of sorts that would certainly be a conversation piece.  When we searched the body e found heroin and a needle in his pocket.

The dead man’s companion–I hesitate to call him friend, I have no idea what their relationship really was–watched us from the corner of his eye as we worked to catalog everything on the body and hand over evidence to the officer on scene.  He never said a word.  He tried to feign disinterest.  He seemed somehow ashamed and tried to hide it.  “I just didn’t want to know….” Several months later, I was at the morgue performing my nightly duties when a body was dropped off by one of the funeral homes we contracted to do recoveries during off hours.  When I worked the overnight shift, I was alone - literally the only living person in the building--so the funeral homes would help out by picking up decedents from public scenes like car crashes.  Like I said, working that job was an experience, man, and trust me when I say I have lots of stories. On this night the funeral home dropped off an overdose victim.  This one was a woman; mid-twenties.  She had been missing for several weeks.  She was found in a building known to local police as a drug house.  It was clear that she had been dead for maybe 2-4 days and was in early stage decomposition by the point our paths crossed.  Her blood had coagulated, liver mortis was clearly evident, and rigor had released, but she wasn’t yet bloated and the smell was pretty tame.  When she was alive it would have been fair to call her pretty.  Lying there on the gurney there was no way I would ever call her pretty – there was too much pain: an addict that had gone too far, a desperate family putting in a missing persons report that would never again see her alive, parents who lost their daughter.  Whatever attractiveness she had in life was nullified by the symbol of wasted potential, selfishness, and grief laying on the gurney.  Her face was still blue.

Listening to Thirteenth Step resonates very differently to me these days.  It shouldn’t be surprising having had the proximity to addiction and death that I did.  But listening to the album today, especially “Blue”, shook me.  Music has a way of doing that–giving us a medium to contextualize our memories.  Mer de Noms is a positive walk down memory lane for me.  It is the nostalgic Member Berry that encourages me to reminisce about what was one of the most transformative points in my life: when I started playing guitar, dating girls, sneaking out at night, and going to concerts. I listened to that album right as I began laying the groundwork for what would become my adult personality, and it shaped me deeply.  Thirteenth Step encourages a different set of memories, ones that are equally valuable in their own way, I guess, even if they are certainly uncomfortable.  What was originally a somewhat disappointing album release from a band that I deified is now terrifying and existential to me–and I both adore and fear it.

Wrapping up this post I have to say, I’m not really sure why I wrote it.  I’m even less sure about why I’m choosing to put it up on a public forum for literally anyone to read.  I guess I can package this up as an exercise in contrasts, or a story about how music contextualizes our experiences and personal growth, or even how a piece of music can have different meaning to us at different points of our lives. But I think more than anything else this post is cathartic and allows me to give structure to what were two very significant and still raw personal experiences and start to come to terms with them?  Maybe? I guess if I could leave you with any parting thoughts they would be: Music is powerful.  Drugs are bad.  Hug those close to you often. Thank you for reading. Horns up, Shea \m/ 

[thevampatease]

The Vampatease’s Big Fic Rec List

Including some of my own, but shut up this is my blog, my party, and I’ll cry over my two favorite dumbasses if I want to

Requested by by one of our Shandom newcomers, but I feel like we could all use more fic in our lives!

Everything by @d1rtycha1/Admin Arrow, of course. She’s our most prolific author!

Keep the lights off, turn a blind eye by Goffy

Darius Shan refuses to acknowledge what is right in front of him.

Cirque du Freak Oneshots by Nomilily

A collection of drabbles/one-shots showcasing mainly Steve-centric plots. These short excerpts will span across both the canon storyline and a few other alternate timelines. Expect romance, domestic fluff, angst, adventures in parenting, political treaties, and more!

Lord of the Flames by orphan_account

A fic for the Festival of the Undead on Tumblr. Steve Leopard of the Cirque Du Freak Family requested Stannen with some h/c. My take on the Coffin of Fire event from Steve's POV. It's been a while since I read the books, so sorry for any inaccuracies.

History in the Making by The Vampatease

The infamous high school au arrives! Wow I sure never updated this huh

Truth or Dare by the Vampatease

A Stannen fic for y'all. ;) I don’t think it’ll be hard to guess when this takes place; I’ve always thought that Steve followed the vampaneze, got himself captured, and Gannen had to bail him out. I’ve since revised my theories of how they met, but this was still a fun idea I think

Stay by ruined shadows

Steve Leonard. It had been two whole years since the name had come up, but Annie Shan could surely never forget such a strange individual. And when she suddenly meets him again on a cold September night, what is she to say? StevexAnnie, Book 11 Spoilers

Payphone by wonker8

No song, no problem! Let’s flip the roulette called itunes…

Setting: Sometime after The River Scene (You know which one).

In Time by The Vampatease

Characterization exercise set in the pre-war planning time. Haven’t reread it in a million years so idk if it hold up

NSFW

Cultivated Adulation by Monsters Grim

Because even the blissfully ignorant and in love need to be taught a painful lesson about the dangers of sex with Steve Leopard.

Idiot Savant by Nomilily

id·i·ot sa·vant

noun

1. A person who is considered to be mentally handicapped but displays brilliance in a specific area, especially one involving memory.

2. A person displaying great intelligence or aptitude for mental endeavors but completely lacks common sense, particularly social skills.

3. Steve fucking Leonard.

What Never Happened by The Vampatease

So we all remember the beginning of book 9, right? Where the hunters are threatening to torture Steve to find out the identity of the Vampaneze Lord, and Steve is like, way too into the idea? What if that, but, uh, it turned out a little different. Steve leans into being an unhinged mess, Crepsley learns some new things about himself, and Gannen will TURN THIS SHIP AROUND IF YOU DON’T BEHAVE, I stg you two!

Please scroll along if the idea of adult Steve, Gannen, and Crepsley getting consensually hot and heavy makes you feel gross.

And here is another fic rec post someone else made so I don’t have to individually repost everything because I’m lazy!!

[maybuds]

hi, the post from "idkwhattoputhereahh" is a scam. any post w the name "laura mae deramas" in it (in the email screenshots) isn't legit, she's prolific scammer on this site and is constantly changing usernames/accounts

hi! i just want to give some context because i’ve been seeing a lot of filipino donation blogs that are being flagged as scams since last year.

so i’m filipino but i’m also middle class & highly proficient in english (i.e. what we call “colonial,” basically). i’m very well-informed on western cultures, etc., especially american “culture” despite never having stepped foot in the US, not to mention the fact that i’ve been here on tumblr for a long time (this blog is quite new but i’ve been using tumblr since 2010 i think?) & so i have an idea why people are wary of tumblr donation blogs that don’t seem legit based on a criteria (no posts other than the donations, no personal posts, no reblogs except the donation posts, etc.) in the philippines, tumblr generally isn’t a very well-known platform. in fact i would probably say that it’s a more middle- to upper-class platform: a lot of filipinos i know that use tumblr are either english-proficient & can get in on western memes / humor / discourse / content etc., or have a lot of friends who are also on here– but most of the time they’re english-proficient. facebook is really the go-to mass media platform in the philippines, that’s where families socialize or communicate, or make personal status updates, post selfies & (local) memes, etc. but since tumblr has gained a reputation for being a good platform to ask for donations, a lot of struggling filipinos who need money make accounts here solely to ask for help, & not really to socialize or scroll through content & look at aesthetics / curate their blog posts like whatever that rest of us are here for.

now, i don’t know miss deramas personally, but i did some checking based on this ask, & i easily found a facebook profile & also a twitter profile that hasn’t been updated since 2016. both have pictures of her face in it, as well as of her family. according to the FB profile, she’s from davao & speaks bisaya primarily but can also speak tagalog, as well as english but not as fluently. also found her mom’s fb & tiktok (marites deramas, the one mentioned in the emails / messenger screenshot). by tumblr standards, maybe some fb / tiktok account won’t be enough, which is understandable. (i would’ve liked to link their fb / tiktok accounts, but i’m not sure that’s my place to do that since these ARE their personal social media accounts.)

of course i am by no means an expert on identifying scam blogs, & multiple profiles in other platforms can’t definitely clear all suspicion. i have talked to her, but because i don’t know her personally, i can’t absolutely & conclusively state that everything she’s posted is 100% true. i’m also definitely not forcing people to donate to her if they find her sus. but i just wanted to add context to this. as i see it i think asking for help on tumblr & dropping your name & pictures / videos of your face, your family & family home, screenshots of conversations & emails, etc., is maybe not the “safest” way for a con to scam people for that (really infrequent) $5-dollar donation if they’re the ones exposing their infos out there.

[serpentstole]

Hi! I’m new to Luciferianism but I stumbled across your tumblr in my googling and really vibe with a lot of what you say. Do you have any suggestions of books, websites, articles, anything really that are good, solid sources of information? What are the “foundation” texts every Luciferian should read? Anything or any authors to avoid? (Like Joy of Satan.) Thanks for taking the time to answer!

Thanks for reaching out! It's wild that this blog shows up in google searches about Luciferianism... it's not something I really expected, but I like to think there are worse alternatives.

To prevent making this a hugely long and repetitive answer, I went and grabbed some previous posts.

Here's the last answer I gave concerning my general reading suggestions and tips, including what I think are some major foundational ideas and texts that led to how we tend to perceive Lucifer. I also talked about why I think it's worthwhile for Luciferians to give a glance at the Christian Bible in this post, as I know for some folks it might feel counterintuitive. I don't really have a formal point form list at this time, because I don't like recommending books I haven't personally read and vouch for, and finding readily appropriate and recommendable Luciferian specific books can be... tricky.

As far as specific authors to avoid go, I'm really not a fan of Michael W Ford, prolific as he is. I go into a bit of my issues with his writing here, where I use Bible of the Adversary as an example, as it's the one I see recommended/found the most often and the book of his I had on hand to pull examples from. However, I wouldn't say you should avoid his books at all cost if you're curious? I don't want to pretend like it's impossible you could get some inspiration or worth from his work just because I'm very critical of it.

For a more general idea of what to avoid... that comes with practice. I have a list of my own personal red flags and dog whistles I posted here the other day, but getting a feel for what's worthwhile to read and engage with will be a skill you develop over time. Also, it'll be down to personal taste! I don't want to pretend like my version of Luciferianism is the only way to do it. The things I look out for tend to be a spectrum. For example, one of the Luciferian books I do often encourage people to read is very Gnostic in nature, but since I know my opinions on Gnosticism and some of the implications it can carry, I'm critical about what I take from it. Meanwhile, a book about Lilith or Qliphoth has nothing for me as a Luciferian from a Christian background, and I tend to be suspicious of how many of these books are actually written by those coming from Judaism... though I wouldn't say it's impossible.

Articles are likewise a little tricky to recommend. I don't have any specific trusted website I can name, and the article that actually introduced me to the concept of Luciferianism is a bit narrow. I even have mixed feelings about the old post Sarah Anne Lawless made about Luciferian witches, despite being a long time fan of her writing and work. It's just such a varied and nuanced religion that there will never be a definitive source of information, and unfortunately I've found far more duds than useful information. If I ever stumble across a solid resource, I'll be sure to share it.

While it's not a formal guide or source of information, I highly recommend the 30 Day Luciferianism/Satanism Challenge that I took part in. Not necessarily my answers, but working on it for yourself! I found it an excellent tool for examining my own religion as someone who's been settled into it for a few years now, so I think that someone approaching it as very new to Luciferianism could use it to help figure out what parts of their beliefs or practice they want to expand on, research, et cetera.

Hope it helps! Feel free to reach out again with any other questions you have.

[ekbirchelps]

writeblr intro

I know what you’re probably all thinking. Who in the name of all that is good is this?

Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Emma, or Em for short—lover of long-winded introductions, histrionic purple prose, and poking my nose in where it doesn’t belong. I started crafting stories around the age of twelve and haven’t given up yet (which should count for something, right?). As an amateur writer, professional geek, and all-around procrastinator, I’ve chosen to create this blog in the (perhaps naive) hope that it’ll help motivate me to finish my WIPs and develop as a writer in the process. The fact that I waited four years to make a writeblr rather sums up my attitude toward writing pretty well.

For the most part, my interest in both the reading and writing spheres has been in fantasy, though I do enjoy the occasional historical, sci-fi, or young adult novel. The past couple years have also seen a considerable increase in consumption of fanfiction and related media. Once a prolific reader, my reading rate has plunged dramatically since the beginning of school. I’m determined to read as much as I can this summer, however, and catch up on all the content I’m missing currently.  

On to the matters you actually care about: I currently have a whopping total of three fan projects finished and published, which you can read here. One is a cringy Heartland fanfiction, the second a melodramatic one-shot based off the Disney movie Tangled, and the third a Marvel (yes, Marvel) story intended to be the first of a series I have yet to complete. Make of them what you will.

My major ongoing projects, the Magenaza Epic and the Starborn Chronicles, have been written, edited, scrapped, and rewritten more times than I can count. The former is a fantasy story based in a pseudo-Mesopotamian society with a few modern elements, such as guns, trains, and electricity, mixed in. The latter has been split into two editions: the original fantasy version, and the “modern au” version no one asked for. Both involve a girl trying to solve the mystery surrounding the death of her older brother. Neither story is moving along at a speed desired by any respectable writer, but I can’t really blame school or my (practically nonexistent) social life because neither existed last summer and I still wrote next to nothing. Perhaps joining the tumblr writing community will help resurrect those poor neglected projects.  

Links

Navigation

About

Main blog

Aesthetics blog

Hunger Games blog

I’d love to follow blogs of similar interests/purpose, so go ahead and reblog! I look forward to meeting all of you!

Sincerely,

- Em

[the1918]

2020 for the1918

Am I the last person to make this list? Maybe. Do I regret that? Yes. Am I making it anyways because my cognitive behavioral therapy is teaching me fix my avoidance issues? Also Yes.

Let’s do this: @The Trees In Front of Cevans’s House and @Bucky’s Arm... you da real MVPs.

But other than them...

Thank You to Everyone that Truly Made My 2020:

@cantabile-l  Jo (Daddy Dumpster™ Co-Founder) — I have to list you first. How could I not? Every friendship I’ve made in this fandom comes back to you. We literally bonded over porn lookalikes and started this craziness called the Stucky Porn Lookalikes Archive ( @stucky-lookalikes-archive ) to preserve the porn, and it now has now has 85k hits and 500 bookmarks (!!!?!!). But it’s more than that, even more than starting the Daddy Dumpster™ and bonding over culihos. Bespoke got finished because you got me excited enough to want it, just like half a dozen other fics. You were also the basis for many, many other friendships that I list below. Your nesting head canons were the inspiration for so, so many A/B/O moments in my fics. We’re so on the same length on an intellectual and spiritual level (I feel like you and me and @ixalit are three parts of one whole ❤) and I am in love with you for it. Culihos forever.

@hanitrash​ Hani (O.G. Dumpster™ Citizen) —I’m so, so damn glad you’re in my life. We share that sick sense of humor and refusal to adopt a filter. You add flavor to our Dumpster™ with your wit, and I feel so warm when you share pics and updates about the family with us. You were the first person I ran to when I “discovered” HTP and you held my hand 😂 And Jesus—your talent. I could go on and on and on about Through The Darkness I Heard Your Voice and Private Showing, but also one of my New Year’s resolutions is to start reading your work as Loralynne Summers. Thank you for making me smile every day of last year since April.

@trekchik Jini (O.G. Dumpster™ Citizen) — I can’t speak to the number of laugh-out-loud, belly-grabbing, cackling moments I have had in a year that could easily have been shit otherwise, all because of you. I feel like you’ve truly become a member of my family; like, I see you posting in the Dumpster™ when I wake up in the morning and I think to myself, “Oh, what’s the fam up to today?”. I know I’ve gone on and on about your talent (absolute queen of dialogue and pacing) before, but I don’t thank you enough for keeping the Porn Archive alive when the rest of us are slacking. Your Stucky Tumblr Drabbles (especially the meet cutes) puts a smile on half the fandom’s face regulary, and I’m excited to re-read the wonderful Anagnorsis & Peripeteia soon. Here’s to another year of weird dildo pictures.

@thegodswife Amanda (Dumpster™ Citizen) — I feel like we were literally destined to become friends. The love I feel for you and your little family is real and immense, and I feel like your victories (in life and in writing) are my victories. You have made a slow but steady convert of me to Shrinkyclinks with fics like peaches and because it's christmas, and I am in awe of your talent for writing charged dynamics with jaw-dropping moments. This fandom is lucky to have such a gem as you. 2021 is going to be the Year of Amanda (*clinks Lindeman’s Framboise glasses 🥂*)

@ixalit Max (Dumpster™ Citizen) — My relationship with you has and continues to be lifechanging for more reasons than I can even go into on tumblr. You make me laugh. You make me cry (usually in good ways). You make me horny by supplying the #porn-and-fun as the dutiful resident horny teenage boy of Dumpster™. I remember so clearly when we first messaged talking about your Evanstan thoughts and fics, and I knew your writing was special then (omg, Hiraeth?? How dare). You deserve all the success you earned in 2020 and every bit more success that you will continue to have this year. There is no one else I would rather have with me as we make this ~journey through Song of the Rolling Earth together. 

@becassine Bex (Dumpster™ Citizen) — What can I say about my lucky charm? 🍀 I found our friendship later in the year and I feel it was truly central to the way I finished out my year with a bang (lol). Your encouragement to finish Bespoke supercharged me, and I’m still riding that high in writing SoRE. But for every bit we talk about you being the Queen of Hype (Becassine, First of Her Name), I am also stunned by your own gorgeous writing. The Way I Feel For You is a gift to this fandom and it’s gonna keep rocking our world, along with any other creative endeavor you choose to embark on. Thank you for the treasure of your continued friendship.

@darter-blue​ Bec (Dumpster™ Citizen) — My gorgeous, gorgeous cunt of a friend. What ever am I going to do with you? I feel like you and I have clicked so perfectly and so instantly, and I feel such a strong connection to you. I have been enamored with your skill and your style since I first stumbled across your Sergeant Barnes and Colonel Rogers: A Love Story series and then rapidly gobbled up your other writing. Getting to collab with you on No Vacancies was a dream come true. You make me feel so connected to the outside world and humanity even in this bizarre time and even though you’re on the other side of the world.

@kalee60 Kel (Dumpster™ Citizen) — You flawless sass-master. You brilliant human. You tricky little bastard. What a perfect addition to the Dumpster™ you have been! And your talent, Jesus... just being around you makes me want to write. I have truly never seen someone with as much talent write so prolifically, and I am in very real awe of it. If I had to pick “Fic of the Year” for me, I would not hesitate to pick Push The Button—it turned my world upside down—but for as much as we talk about that epic, your AU Extravaganza is really miracle to behold. And I am so, so pumped for you during this exciting time coming up in your life. Here’s to magnificent year for you in 2021!

@andysmountains​ Andy Gator Lord 🐊 — You’ve changed my life. I’m sitting here and I honestly don’t know how else to put it. You’re hilarious and you’re a ball of sunshine and you have kept this breeder feeling rooted to reality (in a great way) and remembering how to smile during some of the shittiest times I can remember. Newts. You’ve helped me explore my identity, and I’m not sure what greater gift you could have given me. Also, I’ve never heard true love whispered more sincerely than when I see 🔪—and I would give you nine hundred and ninety-seven 🔪 now if not for the fact that you have literally beat me to it.  

@ceratonia-siliqua Cera — We’ve shared so much. I feel so privileged that you’ve picked me to be a person that you want to talk to during hard times because you’re such a special guy, and because you’ve got talent that the world needs to see forever and ever and ever (I continue to blown away by what you did in Sunshine, and none of us are ready for Quilt Fic™) and I hope you never stop writing your whole damn heart out. I truly love you. I do. Thank you for reminding me that there is endless humanity and prose in this world.

@howdoyousleep3​ K — I feel like 2021 couldn’t be starting off better now that you’re in my life again. Last year was largely defined for me by the time I spent with you, and I’ve truly been changed by you and your writing. You are an endless amount of inspiration for me and this whole community; I would bet real money that the number of Daddy Kink converts that owe their new *interest* to finding your Daddy Steve Rogers/Baby Bucky Barnes series numbers in the hundreds (not to mention your other AUs). But fics aside, I had so many smiles and laughter throughout 2020 because of you, and I owe such a big part of my happy heart to you and your presence in my life. You have a huge, caring heart. Cheers to Cevans continuing to be a giant, bro-ish man slut and us never stopping giving him shit for it — and here’s to Trucker Bucky and his bug.

@lullabybeauty Bee — I’m not sure I would still be writing if it weren’t for you. The interest you took in my fics and endless support you’ve provided have turned me into a real-life 🥺🥺🥺 face so many times I can’t count them. But more than the hype you provide, you are an amazing person, and I hope you never stop putting (and ceaselessly keeping) the word out in our community through your blog that Black Lives Matter and black women matter now and forever; it’s far too easy for those of us who are white to let that truth fade from our minds when there’s not something terrible happening in the news, and I’m so thankful for your posts filling up my dash with reminders I need to be a good ally and giving me information to share with others. Thank you for the gift of yourself.

@ywecanthavenicethingsanymore Caroline—You sort of swooped out of nowhere for me and boosted my confidence through the roof. Your comments and your hype and your hilarious tags remind me every day that writers are only half of the fanfiction equation; all we do without supportive friends like you is sit in the corner dreaming of stories we don’t have the confidence or feel-good to put to words. Thank you for your constant support and for being so. damn. cool.

@littlesurfergrl Heather—Oh, Heather. Queen of the A+ tags. Sender of inbox updates about what time you get off of work and why you’re vibrating to read a fic. All-around beautiful person. Your love and support is magic in my veins.

@hoeforthegays Baby J—I am so damn excited for this creative project you’ve taken on; you are so talented. I look forward to our thirst talks all the time. You make me laugh with your screaming and even your advice. Such a source of sunshine in my life.

@capbvckyrogers / @tae-withsuga Cam — You were the first person who ever reblogged a farmer daddy post. You were the first person who ever sent me a prompt. Honestly, you were the first person who ever bonded with me over a character. There zero (0) chance I would have enjoyed fandom (or certainly any kind of creative success) the way that I did in 2020 if not for you. Thank you, endlessly. 

@justice-for-plums​ Kenz — Another “late in the year” friendship find that I am so grateful for. I love our talks! I am so thankful you felt comfortable to reach out and talk about writing. Our workshopping has helped remind me of what works and what doesn’t for me, and I love the creative collaboration on head canons! Excited for more in 2021.

Shrunkyclunks Bitches®, or those not mentioned already above: @dreadlockholiday (co-founder of the Bitches® with @justice-for-plums​ and #1 reason I blushed last year), @oh-i-swear-writes​ @wayward-lives​ @allegedlyann and others I either am missing on tumblr or forgetting (but not because I don’t love you) — Here’s to Cap Steve and modern Bucky and 1,000,000+ words written during our writing sprints in 2021. [Bitches® server membership is open by the way! If you love Shrunkyclunks, contact Dready @dreadlockholiday​].

And to the endless list of others who made me smile, laugh, sometimes cry, feel proud, but always feel that incredible Stucky love — a list that includes but is certainly not limited to @fishcustardandclintbarton,​ @hawkeyeandthewintersoldier, @willbakewithstucky, @hannah-stagram​, @thewaythatwerust​, @bigbraiiin, @musette22, @luninosity​, @fandomfluffandfuck​, @maddiewritesstucky​, @hbalbat, @doctorenterprise​, @epicstuckyficrecs, @k347 and the massive important people I know I am forgetting (...like some BIG ones)

To everyone above and anyone else who has scrolled this far:

Thank you.

Let’s all have a fantastic 2021 🥂