#slowly working through the requests in my inbox!!

[sersi]

- Sally Rooney

[nguyenfinity]

can you draw more of the loser dorm (kohaku and jun) ... i like to imagine that theyre like brothers too n have a lot of heart-to-heart conversations....

Yeah probably

Bonus:

[taaalia]

Bill close

girlie does /not/ know whats coming💀

[kurusick]

♡come here

movie!mike schmidt x fem!reader

tags- semi nsfw, manspreading..?, dom!mike (forgive me)

an: literal first fic one here lmfao😭 little tease into what my writing looks like. feel free to send requests in my inbox!! Mike Schmidt is consuming my brain… credit to @/josh1es for the idea !!

★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆

mike had stumbled through the door at around 6:30, shrugging off his shoes and vest; leaving cold air in his wake. It was below zero, and you had been bundled up on the couch in 2 of his blankets.

you perked up at Mike’s arrival, stretching and peering over the couch you were previously curled into; being greeted by tired eyes. You smiled to him, greeting him with a “hey” in a quiet, sleepy voice. mike yawned in response, giving a small “hi” as he undid his tie with his right hand. you sat up as he fell into his armchair, spreading his legs comfortably and finally working off his tie. You tried to not let your eyes linger, but the way he was positioned made you half cough in surprise. mike looked at you a bit confused, but paid no mind. focusing his attention on the movie you had playing, spreading his legs wider and placing his hands on his knees. Unconsciously almost, he slowly ran his hands back up to his thighs. your breath hitched in your throat, trying to focus on anything other then him. mike spoke up “did you get Abby to bed okay?” You shook your head yes, fingers prodding at the skin on ur lip. mike sighed pleasantly, muttering out a “good” seemingly more preoccupied with something else. Confused, you finally looked back over to him. Mike had unbuttoned the top 3 buttons of his colored shirt, and popped the button on his pants. Your breath hitched in your throat. He was never one to cross the boundary of friendship, teetering in the edge. He gave small little hints here and there sure but he had never done anything like this. Mike rested his hands on his thighs, almost spreading them apart. you stared. “Mike..” you half whispered, looking him in the eye. he smiled. He could tell you had been looking at him, looking at him for the past 2 months you had been babysitting Abby. He saw the way you stared at his crotch when he decided to change into his pajamas before seeing you out the door, the way you bit your lip when he would rest a hand on his thigh, almost touching his cock. He thought about you at night, how you would taste, feel, sound. Mike had always enjoyed you, especially now, hanging over the couch. Jaw half opened in shock. He hummed lowly, beckoning you over.

“come here”

★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆ ★☆☆☆☆

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Hi 💗 I hope you’re doing well! This is soooo random and might not be much but may I request another roommate Carmy one-shot where he fixes something around the apartment and looks really hot while doing it? So, reader gets turned on and wants to show her appreciation for his handiness, meanwhile he’s like, I’d fix anything for you. And things just get hot and heavy and maybe even kinda fluffy. I’m just on a Carmy binge rn, and I loveeeee how you write him! 🥹❤️

Hands On.

Synopsis - A broken lightbulb leads to some interesting discoveries for both you and Carmen.

Pairing - Roommate!Carmen Berzatto x Female Reader

Warnings - smut. cursing. carmen's big ego.

Age Rating - 18+

Word Count - 1.5k

Author's Note - thank you for this request!! another roommate!carmy fic <3 this takes place in the roommates universe, but it's up to you if it comes before or after the other fics - there's no timeline!! this one got a little filthy, actually. the roommate series seems to be getting dirtier and dirtier... i would apologise, but i'm not sorry.

as always, reblogs, comments and feedback (even anonymous feedback) are immensely appreciated!! your reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics, which keeps me going <3

Series Masterlist. Masterlist. Inbox.

You're sat reading a book on your bed when the room is suddenly plunged into darkness.

You shriek in shock, and Carmy comes running, socked feet sliding on wooden floors through the apartment.

"Honey? You okay?"

He knocks twice before swinging the door open, looking around.

"Why are you sat in the dark?"

You huff and throw your book in his direction.

"I wasn't, until one second ago. The light just went off."

"Did it blow?"

"What?"

"Did it make a noise, when it went out? Did it flicker? Pop?"

"I don't know, Carm. It just kinda... went out."

He grabs his phone from his pocket to use as a flashlight, shining it at your overhead lamp.

"Looks like the bulb has blown. I think have a spare in the kitchen cabinet. Hold on."

He departs, leaving you sat on your bed, unable to see much. There's a warmth slowly building in your stomach, and you take a breath. Why are you so flushed, all of a sudden?

"Here. Got one. You think you can hold the light for me while I replace it?"

You nod and jump out of your spot, grabbing the phone from his hand. You point it towards the ceiling, watching as Carmy reaches up to unscrew the old bulb. His white t shirt rides up his stomach as he raises his arms, exposing his taut muscles. You exhale a shudder of a breath, willing yourself to calm down.

"Honey, can you stay a little more still please? The light is shaking."

"Sorry, Carm."

He winks at you before reaching up again, screwing in the new bulb. You can't stop staring at his arms, his strong biceps flexing as he works. His hands, big and rough, completely dwarf the little lightbulb. You know how those fingers feel as they brush across your skin. Little moments - like him skimming your back as he passes you in the kitchen - are imprinted in your mind, swirling around at a million miles per hour.

You're practically panting by the time he's finished, willing yourself to calm down.

"You okay, honey?"

You don't hear him. Instead, you're watching him run his fingers through his hair, pushing it out of his eyes. You want to pull it as hard as he'll let you.

A hand on your shoulder startles you back to reality.

"You okay?"

You clear your throat, taking a deep breath.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm good. Thank you, Carm. Don't know what I'd do without you. Seriously."

He chuckles, running his fingers up and down your arm.

"It's not a problem. I'd fix anything for you."

Your eyes shoot up from the floor to meet his, ocean blue irises focused on your face.

"...Really?"

He looks taken aback by your question.

"Yeah, really. You didn't know that? I'd do anything for you, sweetheart. Genuinely, anything."

You don't think before you move. You lunge forward and connect your lips to his, fingers tangling into his hair just like you imagined.

Carmy kisses you back with more passion than you expected, hands gripping at your hips to pull you flush against his body. He slips his tongue into your mouth as you happily let him take the lead, humming in contentment.

Eventually, you pull back, gasping for air. Carmy rests his forehead against yours, both of you catching your breath.

"What was that for?" he whispers.

"Just wanted to thank you."

"That was a hell of a thanks," he chuckles.

You smile, running your thumb across his cheek.

"You're so fucking hot when you fix stuff for me around the apartment."

"Wait... what?"

"Fuck, Carm. I got so turned on watching you drill that kitchen cabinet last week that I had to take a cold shower."

"That's what does it for you?"

"It's just you. You're good with your hands. It's fucking sexy."

"Yeah?"

He's smirking now, clearly enjoying having his ego inflated. You know you shouldn't, but you continue. You grab one of his hands, running your fingers over the palm.

"I imagine that my hands are yours when I touch myself."

He groans, low and rumbled.

"That's what I think about, Carm. At night, when I can't sleep. Think about the way you'd touch me, the way your hands would feel on my thighs, my tits, wrapped around my throat."

"Fuck."

"I'm surprised you haven't heard me. I try to be quiet, but I'm not very good at it."

Carmen's chest is heaving, eyes dark and watchful. You can see the thoughts forming in his head, filthy and menacing.

"Such a dirty fuckin' mouth," he drawls, running this thumb over your bottom lip carefully. "Maybe we should put it to better use, hmm?"

You whine at his tone, but you're smug on the inside. There he is, you think. The Carmen that you don't get to see very often. The version of him that's domineering, possessive, assertive. You like him like this.

"Wanna see how pretty you look on your knees for me."

You can't say no to that.

You sink down onto the carpet, looking up at him with wide eyes. He looks as if his control is wearing thin. You want it to snap.

"Now what?" you tease.

"Don't do that."

"Do what?"

"Play innocent. Not after all that shit you just said."

You smirk, running your fingertips over the tent in his sweatpants. He grabs your wrist, holding it tightly.

"Don't fuckin' tease, honey. You and I both know I'm not patient."

"Something you should definitely work on," you wink, pulling his pants and underwear down his legs.

Your mouth waters as you look at him. He's pretty all over.

"Gonna thank you properly now," you murmur, before taking him in your mouth gently.

Carmy groans, hand flying to the back of your head. He tangles his fingers into your hair, keeping you anchored in front of him. He doesn't force you anywhere, just keeps you still.

"Goddamn, you look pretty with your mouth stuffed full of me," he drawls. "This what you wanted, baby?"

Baby. That's a new one. The nickname goes straight to your core, rubbing your thighs together to ease the ache. You nod in response to him, taking him deeper.

"Fuck. So perfect. Fuckin' made for me. Only me."

You nod again, reassuring him you've heard.

"Tell me, baby. Please. Use your words."

You release him with a pop, drool running down your chin and landing on your chest. You take a deep breath, licking your lips.

"I'm yours, Carm. Always have been. I'm yours. This pussy is yours."

You swear you see his knees buckle as he smirks down at you. He looks like the cat that got the cream.

"Gonna fuck you all over the apartment, baby. Every single surface. Doesn't matter if we break something. I'm good with my hands after all."

He winks at you before guiding himself back to your mouth, sinking down to the hilt. You hollow your cheeks and suck, trying not to smile when he practically whimpers. It's a power trip, having a man like Carmy at your mercy.

"Gonna cum down your pretty throat, angel."

You pull away to murmur against his skin.

"Want you to. Please, Carm. Wanna taste you. Wanna swallow it all."

He groans, deep and visceral, as you double down on your efforts, determined to get him to his ending. You dig your nails into his thighs, scratching down the skin as his hand tightens in your hair. The edge of pain is what undoes him, muscles tensing as he spills down your throat.

You catch his eyes, ensuring you have his attention. Swallowing carefully, you stick your tongue out, showing him proof of your promise.

"Good fuckin' girl," he breathes, dropping to his knees to connect your lips, languid and filthy.

Carmy smooths the hair back from your face, placing a tender kiss to your forehead, your cheeks, your nose, the corner of your mouth. Collapsing back against the bed, he pulls you with him, wrapping you in his arms.

"You okay?" he whispers into your ear.

"More than okay. You?"

"I've never been better."

You laugh, and the sound makes him grin, white and beaming.

The two of you sit on the floor for a while, unbothered by the passing of time. You're enjoying being so close, the proximity a welcome change. Eventually, Carmy breaks through the silence.

"So, I've been meaning to mount our TV on the wall... you wanna watch?"

You elbow him in the side, heat creeping up your cheeks as you both laugh.

DIY suddenly doesn't seem all that bad.

@dins-cyarika

[halcyone-of-the-sea]

I know your requests are closed so feel free to ignore this but if I don’t type it somewhere I WILL forget it lol. I’ve been re-binge reading your works and just thought of this…

Civilian reader kills someone out of self defense for the first time. And it’s the whole staring at her bloody shaking hands panic attack what have I done fiasco. And her boyfriend or husband helping her through it and dealing with it all (I can see it with Ghost or Price idk)

But yeah feel free to ignore, I know your requests are closed rn

Love your work! You are so talented!

This has been in my inbox for so long, lmao. Sorry for not answering right away - take a few paragraphs w. soft, worried, Simon in compensation.

Warnings for gore, death, blood, panic attack, etc. F!Reader.

Your body shakes violently, blood dripping down like crimson tears from your hands. The overwhelming sense of dread sits with bullet fragment aggression in the delicate make-up of your psyche.

You weren't meant for this.

Not the blood or the terror. Certainly not the body laying out in the hallway.

"Oh, fuck," you gasp out, shuddering as your throat swells in on itself. Your form had slipped down the wall just across from the door not minutes prior, legs weak and heart pounding like a war call. Now all you can do is stare into the vacant eyes of some random burglar—at the knife you'd stuck in his chest when he'd backed you into Simon's office.

It was a miracle that you remembered where your husband's combat blade had been, seen on some off chance when you'd been cleaning. He tries to keep this all separate, you know.

The blood just keeps slipping out of the corpse. It's a pool now, and you don't know how long you'd been huddled like this until the sounds of rampaging feet and hurried yells of your name bounce off your eardrums.

All you can see is the uncleanable amount of red.

Simon had only gone out to the corner store half an hour ago, getting a quick supper so you both could sit in each other's company. You'd been hesitant to watch him leave so soon after getting home, but he'd sworn he'd only be a few minutes.

None of you had thought too much about the local break-ins. After all, Simon was...well, Simon. And he was home.

S-Simon was home.

There's a loud, barked, curse when the body is discovered, stomping feet that make the entire house shake like it was the epicenter of an earthquake. Your husband's form slashes the front of your vision as he kneels in the blood on the floor. Frantic brown eyes behind his balaclava snap from place to place; taking in the familiar handle and blade in nanoseconds. In his left hand he clutches a pistol, white-knuckled.

But you can't even say anything, because you're as still as stone—breathing in concrete as the gravel shreds your vocal cords and trachea. Reality slips in quick streaks of color as Simon's face flashes into the open doorway.

He sees your wide eyes with a mirroring of his own, bone-deep fear striking in his head with a heated pulse.

"Love!" Simon's rushing to you. Your body can't help but startle back, spine shoving into the wall; fingers still saturated and stained.

Inside your chest, your lungs jerk in a strained whimper.

Your husband freezes, one foot ahead with his widened legs as he fights his mind to rush to you and take you into his arms. Simon puts the gun away with little thought to look for more assailants—all that matters is you.

And you looked terrified.

"Hey," hands reach up to this balaclava, slipping the fabric off as he kneels down slowly to one leg. He tosses it to the floor and you try to focus on the strength of his jaw; those scars and pale hairs as your eyes well with tears. A delicate sob builds. "Hey, now. It's just me, alright?"

Simon speaks softly, hands splayed out and a few feet from you. He wishes to hold you tightly but refrains even as his chest tightens at not being able to calm you. The man can't stand that look on your face.

Your fingers curl into shivering fists, "Simon," you cry, finally able to get a solid word out even if it sounds slurred and ragged.

It's all the permission your husband needs.

Simon jerks forward and takes you up into his large arms; the wide encompassing of his palm on the back of your head and the other circling your waist. He angles you away from the body as he glares into it with hatred and vile curses, hissing venom.

When he found the door busted off its hinges, he'd never felt so panicked. Even now as you release a small wail into his neck Simon's heart races, breath coming in short puffs.

"You're alright, Sweetheart. You're alright. I'm right 'ere." You sag into him, grabbing at his leather jacket with nails digging into the brown material. Simon nuzzles his nose into your scalp, muscles tense, "Breathe, it's over."

All you can focus on is Simon's scent, his words. They're the only thing keeping you from oblivion. Eventually, as your husband rocks you back and forth, you can gasp enough air down to push away the black at the sides of your vision.

"That's right," he whispers, gritting his teeth. "Good girl, keep focusin' on me, yeah? You're doin' perfect." Simon doesn't care about the blood or the screams of sirens in the distance.

For the first time in his life, he doesn't care if someone else happens to see his face.

Your husband pulls his head back and shifts his hold to your cheeks, angling your runny and chilled face upwards. He grits his teeth and his eyes bleed with concern; fear.

"...He do anything?" You can only make out half the words as the sounds all huddle together in a ringing tone, but you shake your head in small flinches. Lips find your forehead—heated and firm. Muttered words. "Did so good, Love, I'm so proud of you. S'not your fuckin' fault, you hear?"

Sniffling, you only whimper once more before lips kiss away your tears; thumbs coming up after to swipe at the remnants. Curling over you, this beast—defined so often as ruthless and deadly—shields you from the image of the man you'd killed in self-defense like a demon of smoke and ash. Holding you as if he can make everything else disappear.

After all, you weren't meant for this. You were meant for your soft skin and your loving eyes. Everything else that Simon tied himself to you for—goodness.

"Simon," you gasp again and shove your face into his chest. For the life of you, you can't say anything else. He knows what you mean.

"I'm here," he repeats. Caressing the back of your head, his hand tenses and softens with leaving adreanaline. "Nothin'll happen to you again. It's all gonna be alright."

You believe him.

[churipu]

hii i hope ur midterms r going well !! ive binge read so many of ur work n js wanted to say theyre so amazing (´꒳`) i wanted a request for toji + any other character of ur choice x reader who stays up late n has difficulty sleeping (fluff),, thank u !! 🤍

𝗜𝗧'𝗦 𝗧𝗛𝗥𝗘𝗘 𝗔𝗠 !

────── 𝕴 . featuring. toji fushiguro x reader

────── 𝕴 . warnings. cursing, and mentions of toji being soft, i love him.

note. hi nonnie! thank you so much, you're too nice to me, and yes, my midterms went well! it's been so long since i've done the requests in my inbox, which is the sole reason to why i have closed my ask box so i could finish them all! although, the next time i open them, i won't accept requests for a bit. sorry for those who have visited my inbox and have waited for a long time for your piece to be done. // anyways, new theme = new layout!

"why aren't you in bed?"

toji's voice came out hoarse — he cleared his throat and approached you, sitting himself on the couch despite his heart caressing his ears, pleading for him to go back inside the bedroom and just lay back down on the bed.

the cotton surface of the couch dipped just as he practically threw himself down on it, holding back a loud yawn. you raised a brow, shoving the spoonful of cereal you mixed with milk five minutes ago, just before toji emerged from your shared room.

small yellow chips of cereal that had grown soggy, seeping in the white tasteless liquid dispersed into a mush inside your mouth. they weren't even solid as they're supposed to be, "can't sleep, you?"

"you weren't there."

old habits die hard. that's how the saying goes, and you undeniably agreed to that. the night is an old friend to you, never did your eyelids felt heavy when you were supposed to be in bed, asleep. it's not healthy, you're killing yourself doing this.

"you're such a baby," you mutter out, staring into space, feeling your eyes slowly dissociate — jaw moving in a slow motion, biting into wet and mush before you swallow them.

"y/n, it's three am, y' can't keep doing this stuff," toji scratches his nape, leaning his head back onto the couch rest.

despite your eyes staring into nothing, you could hear his words pretty well. in fact, toji had repeated the same words countless of times that you found yourself engraving it into your mind, "i know, i can't sleep. i know it's not healthy, if i could stop it, i would."

"you're scooping nothing, y/n."

this time, his statement pulled you back into reality. looking down to see that you were indeed scooping no soggy cereal chip, nor a drop of milk onto your spoon. chuckling out lightly, you stood up and sauntered over to the kitchen, dumping what was left of your cereal pieces into the sink.

"you should go to bed," you tell him, wiping your wet hands onto your shirt — crumpling up the fabric to soak them in the access waterdrops lacing your fingers, "'ts late."

toji scoffs lightly, "shouldn't i be saying that shit to you?"

no mistakes there. you emitted out a soft sigh, "i'm fine, i'll be back in bed in a few . . ." toji raises a brow skeptically. he never forgot the last time you said that, he woke up alone on the bed — and you were wide awake on the couch, watching the morning news.

"hell no. it's two of us or nobody goes back to bed, 'm not kidding." he mutters out, not realizing how harsh his voice came out as.

brows furrowed deeply, he looks at you. your disheveled (h/c) hair going all point in a compass points, the visible dark shade of exhaustion coloring under your eyes — and the light creases on the corner of your beautiful, tired eyes.

"can you not?" you mutter, pinching the bridge of your nose; honestly, you can't blame him at all, he's just a worried boyfriend and you were being stubborn.

"can i not what? worry about my own—" he stops mid sentence and shakes his head. toji was never a man of words, he doesn't express his affection to you through words. he's had moments, not a lot, but he's had them.

toji's a man of actions. he thinks that words mean nothing, which you knew, "'m tired, but i can't sleep, okay? i'll just hang out here a few more minutes and i'll come back to bed. you don't have to stay awake just because 'm awake."

"just shut up."

you stare at him, surprised. parting your lips, you try to speak again but toji beats you to it.

"can't i worry about you or something? you're my partner," he said, his then exhausted eyes now fully refreshed. a tinge of frustration coloring his greenish iris.

your eyes darted around for a bit, searching for words to spout out as a reply, "you don't have to worry about me, 'm fine. i promise. so, can you please just go to bed and stop worrying about me?"

"fuck that," he stands up, with heavy footsteps he darted towards you.

his figure grew in your view as he closes the distance between you and him. with a quick motion, he threw you over his shoulder, letting you dangle over his shoulder. at this point, you were too exhausted to even move a limb so you just laid there, not having the cell to even open your mouth.

toji walks over to the bedroom and he sat you down gently on the bed. on most occasions, he would throw you onto the bed playfully — but this was serious. he's pissed, and you're pissed.

"sleep."

you crane your neck upwards, face scrunching into one of annoyance, "i just told you that i can't—"

"try."

shaking your head, you said, "i can't, i've tried."

his finger brushed over your hair, smoothing them back down. he didn't reply to you. frankly, he finds it hard to be in the current position — as a kid, he was taught to never show his weakness. he grew up in a household full of so much hate that he forgot what love is.

here you were. vulnerable, in a weak state that toji has seen a lot before throughout your relationship. if this was anyone else, toji swore he'd tell them to suck it up because life isn't always what they think it ought to be.

but this isn't anyone else, it's you. y/n. the only person toji has showed his own vulnerable sides to — it's like a punch to his gut when he saw a bit of his younger self in you. he had nobody, and nobody had him.

it's different this time, it's not about him anymore. it's about you. you had him, and he had you.

toji inhaled sharply, his large hands slipping underneath your pits as he gently pushes you up. your feet dangled as he then pulled you into him, his right hand traveled onto the hollow of your back — and his left hand prepped your legs around his torso.

you felt like a child, "what're you doing?"

"shut up," he mutters out into the crook of your neck, "just try to get some sleep."

he pressed his lips onto your skin tenderly, making you shudder at the sudden contact — but you liked it. toji didn't stop, with an arm around your waist, and another under your thighs, he held you close to him.

warm and shallow breaths blew onto your skin like warm lights, it didn't tickle, you bury your head into the crook of his neck. copying his actions, "'m sorry."

toji grunted, "for?"

"just . . . everything," you murmur out.

his grip around your waist tightened, "'ts not somethin' to be sorry of, you can't control it. so just try and get some sleep," he muttered out, rocking side to side gently.

a faint smile appeared on your lips as you pulled your head back slightly, "you're too nice to me."

"don't get used to it," toji rolled his eyes.

"i love you too," you planted a kiss onto his lips briefly before returning your head into the crook of his neck, letting him lull you to sleep for the night.

© CHURIPU 2024 , DO NOT COPY OR REPOST ANYWHERE.

[winterrrnight]

Hey can you do after care with rafe? I feel like he would be so sweet and gentle after being so rough and mean!💗

hii nonnie! thank you for your request <3 since I don't write full on smut, this only focuses on the aftercare part!! I also didn't include the rough/mean part cause to be honest that's not my thing! hope you enjoy reading 💗 let me know your thoughts if you feel like 💗

aftercare

PAIRING: soft!rafe cameron x gn!reader

SUMMARY: rafe is a total softie after an intimate night with you.

WARNINGS: allusions to sex but absolutely no sexual content, no allusions to rafe being rough (because I don't write that), a lot of fluff!!

EDITH SPEAKS: since I've been experimenting around a lot with my writing lately, this ask in my inbox really caught my attention so I decided to work on it! please reblog and comment your feedback <3 🏩

navigation || join my taglist || requests

Rafe’s hands clutch onto the ends of the duvet as he pulls them to your neck, covering you under the warm duvet completely as he lies next to you.

“Better?” He asks softly, leaning down to press a kiss to your cheek. You can already feel your eyelids heavy as the tiredness starts to kick in. You softly smile at Rafe and nod your head.

“Yes…” you say softly, and he smiles back at you.

“Okay… do you need anything? Water, tea, maybe something to eat?” He asks gently, moving his hand to brush out any strands of your hair falling in your eyes.

You shake your head, not really feeling like wanting anything. “No, I’m okay,” you say softly, closing your eyes just for a moment, as the warm duvet spreads comfort all throughout you. You can’t help but let out a yawn, bringing a hand to your mouth as you let it out. Rafe only chuckles at that, getting comfortable under the duvet himself.

You are quick to wrap your arms around his shoulders and gently pull him closer to you, letting him rest his head on your chest as you slowly weave your fingers through his hair in sleepy motions, those starting to make him sleepy too. He can’t help but nuzzle against your chest, your body heat along with the warmth of the duvet warming him up quickly.

The moonlight shines in through the pale curtains, and you keep your eyes closed, your fingers gently threading to Rafe’s hair. You momentarily open your eyes to see Rafe looking up, his gaze fixed at nothing particular.

“May I ask what’s on your mind?” You ask softly, pressing a kiss to his forehead.

He softly smiles when he hears your quiet voice, involuntarily pressing himself closer to you, his arm draped across your waist as his fingers trace gentle shapes at your side.

“Just…” he takes a deep inhale, “how good of a time I had with you tonight,” he whispers. You can’t help but feel a soft warmth spread in your cheeks, and a smile tugs on your lips.

“I had a great time with you too baby,” you whisper back. “You were… wonderful,”

“I was?” He asks gently, looking up in your eyes. You let your smile widen as you nod.

“Yes, yes you were…” you murmur, leaning down to him to kiss him gently on his lips. It’s a soft peck, and he can’t help but chase your lips, deepening the kiss a bit, his hand coming to rest on your cheek. His thumb gently strokes the soft skin of your cheek, and your fingers remain wounded in his hair, the strands silky against your fingertips.

You smile against his lips as you slowly pull apart, his fingers gently resting on your shoulders as his fingertips circle over the skin, making you sigh softly at the feeling it stimulates.

He tilts his face up to litter light kisses along your cheek, trailing down to your jawline and the side of your neck, whispering sweet little nothings to you, and you find yourself just immersing yourself in the feeling as much as you can, fluttering your eyes closed as the tiredness starts to take over you completely, his presence only elevating the feeling of comfort in you.

As Rafe notices you’re almost asleep, he smiles softly at the pretty sight in front of him and presses a final kiss to your jaw. “Sleep well baby…” he mutters, snuggling his head against your chest and finding himself falling into a deep slumber too.

↶ೃ✧˚. ❃ ↷ ˊˎ-

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[charles-leclerizz]

🥂 the f1 boys... after an arguement

MEET THE CAST. CL 16 ◦ CS 55 ◦ LN 4 ◦ MV 1

VIDEO DESC. hey guys ! welcome to the start of what i hope to be a long series. i would love for you guys to request something you would like to see, so don't be shy to leave something in my inbox. also please let me know if the graphic above is good, since i would like to continue it for the series

SHOUT OUTS. [@vroomvroomcircuit, @disneyprincemuke, @verstappen-cult, @starkwlkr, @sailing-with-100-ships, @foreveralbon, @lorarri], IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED, PLEASE SEND IN AN ASK, AND MUTUALS LET ME KNOW IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO BE REMOVED ON PRIV !

ᡣ𐭩 ⎯⎯ CHARLES LECLERC 16

" you're being ridiculous ! " Charles shouts, slamming his hands down on the marble and startling you with the loud echo of his palms against the counter.

" me ? " you mumur under your breath, leaning towards him on the opposite side of the kitchen island, " i'm the ridiculous one ? you're the one who was getting drooled on by your ex-girlfriend . " you snarled and stomped your feet.

" je ne peux pas, je ne peux pas- je ne peux pas avoir à nouveau cette fucking conversation avec toi . mon Dieu . " [ i can't, i can't- i can't have this fucking conversation with you again. my God] He ran his hand through his hair and watched as you gaped at him, slowly translating the words in your mind .

"of course," throwing your hands up in the air, you move away from the kitchen and rush down towards the foyer, "it's my fault, it cannot possibly be you, who made a goddamn mistake ?"

you collected your purse and keys, the metallic fob jingled obnoxiously against the bowl, "no it can't becau- what are you doing ? " Charles stopped mid sentence, eyes widening .

Squinting your eyes at him you shook the metal in your hand, "out."

"where is out ? je te prie de te le dire ? " [ pray tell thee ]

"anywhere but here, i need time charles." you mumured, itching to reach out and take his hand as you breathed heavily yet the anger that was bubbling up to a boil had settled into a seething magma, already solidifying into scathing stone.

"time ? " he spluttered, latching onto your bag that had just been slung onto your shoulder, "for what ?"

"for the clocks to reset." you sassed, dropping the clutch into his hand, "god. i'll be back."

the sun had begun to set by the time you had pressed in your combination into the keypad and attempted to silently pad into the apartment.

lest to say, that didn't work, because as soon as the door clicked open and the jingle of the lock had ceased, the sound of steps bounding up to you was following shortly after.

"tu es de retour, Dieu merci, tu es de retour." [ you're back, thank god you're back ] Charles hugged you tightly, hands winding around your waist to hold you close, the comfort of your heartbeat in time with his made him slump over you with relief.

you patted his back slowly, smiling inwardly, "yeah, i'm back. i told you i would be." pressing kisses to his neck but stopped short when small droplets began to wet your top.

"charlie," you sighed, pulling away to hold his red face in your hands. he sniffled and kept his gaze down on where his hands gripped your hips. his fingers fiddled with the hem of your clothing as his bottom lip wobbled and fresh tears bubbled at his lashline.

"charles ." you tried again, rubbing your thumbs against his temple, "why are you crying ? " he sniffed again and shook his head slowly, already curling around you again, going against the gentle force you applied on his face.

"pensé que" [ thought that ] he started, taking a stuttering breath, "thought that you wouldn't come back."

Your heart shattered, "why ?" with a burning throat, you blinked quickly and listened patiently.

"i was so mad, you were mad." charles bit his lip, despite the skin already being rosy and swollen, most likely from his growing worry throughout the day, "i wouldn't have blamed you, if you didn't come back. "

"honey ? " you call out, smiling gently when he finally met your eyes despite the pang that coursed through your body when you noticed the harsh red lines that sat stark in his eyes, "i would never leave you. "

"you wouldn't ?"

"no-" you choked back a sob, "no, why would you think that." scolding him, you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him into you, trapping him in your embrace, "stupid, stupid french man." you grit out, salty streams dripping down your face.

"you're right. " he laughed wetly, rubbing a large palm down your back when you begin to sob laboriously.

"i love you," you detach from him quickly, pecking his lips, his eyes, each and every individual freckle littered on his nose and cheeks, "i love you so much- even when that bitch is slobbering over your arm."

"chérie" he starts, but presses his lips together when you pause in between your smooches to arch an eyebrow at him, "i love you too."

ᡣ𐭩 ⎯⎯ CARLOS SAINZ 55

the sun was beating down on the yacht as the crsytaline blue waves lapped at the pristine white of the boat.

you lay on the sun bed, sunglasses propped up on your head as your eyes twitched, watching as carlos and some random chick were talking on the deck.

it was the days leading up to the monaco grand prix, and since it was easiest to procure a yacht here, the boys thought to host a party, where drinks, dancing and daquiri were a must.

so as the music blasted and almost 20 other people were chatting and moving their bodiees to the music, you were busy seething as the girl ran a hand up carlos' salty, sea water covered bicep.

though you stayed away, book disgarded on your exposed stomach whilst your hands twitched with undisclosed rage at your side.

it was when you noticed that even though your boyfriend glanced down at her fingers, he made no move to push it away, that you decided to get up from your place and saunter towards them.

"-wow you're so strong, it must be so hard to drive an f1 car."

"uhm-"

" hi." you gritted out, lacing your arm with carlos', who stood frozen in his spot, "if you would so kindly, stop humping my boyfriend- i would really appreciate it."

the girl stared at you, mouth opening and closing dumbly.

" you can go do that-" you pointed to the throng of the party, where lando was dj-ing, "over there."

she scoffed and walked away, but not before she winked at the driver on your arm and shot you a dirty glare.

as soon as you were sure that she had left, you slowly turned to carlos, who was already gawking at you, "you have 5 minutes to explain, why and how she felt that she could be doing that to you."

he spluttered, eyes igniting with annoyance, "that was the daughter of one of our biggest sponsors- why would you do that ? mujer loca" [crazy woman]

"i'm the crazy one ?" you asked incredulously, "so i'm meant to watch as you let girls just, what? sex you up?"

"oh come on, you know she wasn't." he rolled his eyes, "and what could i do? if i told her no, she could get me fired."

you crossed your arms at him, "so what you're saying, that no matter what, your job is more important than me and my feelings ?"

" Ay, ¿por qué siempre dices eso? " [ay, why do you always say that ? ] carlos shook his head and held your shoulders, "you need to understand that your feelings are important to me, but so is my career."

you shake your head, "but it's all the time carlos, all the damn time." he tilts his head, large brown eyes conveying his confusion, "it's always, 'we can't go here, its bad for my reputation" or "i'll be back late, the office needs me" . what about when i need you ?"

" i can't go everywhere, it's unsafe, you know that. and i'm not always out late. " he reasons, shrugging.

" no- firstly, it was a cafe, you aren't in danger at a fucking cat cafe. and secondly, name one time this entire month that we ate dinner together."

you wait, wedged foot tapping against the laminated wood beneath your sole. carlos stills for a moment, wracking brain before looking at you again and cringing.

"- see ! "

"- i'm sorry cariño !"

you shake your head pushing away his hands, "not this time- i won't forgive you. i deserve better. "

carlos watches, gobsmacked and panicked when you walk away, already collecting your things as the yacht docks.

the bell to the cafe that you sat in jingles quietly, though you ignore it and continue to pet the sweet, grey cat that purrs in your lap whilst sipping a warm tea.

a shadow forms infront of you, and you look up, eyes widening, "carlos- what are you doing ?"

he pants, bracing his hands on his knees as he doubles over- you instictively reach out and take his hand.

"i-" he keens and pants, "i looked everywhere for you, the apartment, all the shops that you normally go to, landos place, max's place, charles' place. then i remembered that you sent me the link for the directions here." carlos leans down to kiss your head, cradling your face in his palms, "gracias a Dios te encontré". [ thank god i found you. ]

you motion to the seat infront of you, letting the cat that now watched interestedly onto the floor so you could tuck your legs beneath the table, "what do you want ?"

carlos sighs, hanging his head before taking your hand and intertwining your fingers, he rests his forehead on your conjoined hands, "i'm sorry, i'm so so sorry. i told fred that- that i don't want to be talking to sponsors, y'know-" he looks up at you, kissing your hand gently, "like that, especially on my down time. and that i won't be staying in the office after 5pm."

you blink at him slowly, tightening your fingers, "oh.. good."

he finds your embarrassed gaze, and locks your eyes together, his caramel pools glistening beneath the sunlight that streamed in through the large windows. your stare softens, "i forgive you carlos." reaching forward, you brush away the hair that had fallen onto his forehead.

"you do ? i had so much grovelling left to do." he mumurs, glancing nervously to his side.

"did you seriously buy me something, already ? it's been-" you check your watch, "-3 hours ?"

"there was a plan in place Niña bonita. " [ pretty girl ] he reaches to his left and places the small black bag infront of you, "open it."

smirking, you begin to reach into the ominous container and retrieve a medium sized velvet box- as you pop it open, you gasp, "oh wow, it's beautiful."

nestled within, was a gold necklace, small diamonds hanging from the last few delicate chain links and in the middle, sat a chili pendant, petite rubies be-dazzling the body of the charm.

"i bought it a few days ago, i was waiting for the perfect moment to give it to you, but this seemed more appropriate." carlos took the jewellery in his hands and gestured for you to come closer.

craning your neck forward, you laugh quietly to yourself as you watch him stuggle with the clasp before grinning victoriously and retracts his hands away from your nape.

you take his face in your hands, "i love you." you declare as you kiss his pouted lips. he holds your wrists that rest against his jaw, running his thumb back and forth against your pulsee before whispering against your mouth,

"i love you more."

ᡣ𐭩 ⎯⎯ LANDO NORRIS 4

you stomped up to the door before banging on the wood angrily, "lando norris" you huff, "get out of this room right now."

"what ?" Lando wretched the door open, staring down at you, visibly annoyed.

"it has been 3 hours, since you have even stepped out of this room. now it is the winter break, you cannot possible think i will allow you to train on the sim for this long."

He opened his mouth to retaliate when gratingly familiar voices began to laugh and, "ohh" in the background.

"are you streaming ?" crossing your arms over, you're half tempted to push past his fuming chest and unplug the entire setup.

" so what ? you said i'm on break, i can stream if i want to." his voice began to raise dangerously.

"not when i told you that i cooked dinner," you poked his chest, making him blink, "that it's your favourite-" you poked again, "and especially not when i made that fucking tiramisu which you kept on going on and on about from japan." you push him, hard, before stalking out to the kitchen.

"wait ! " he called out, the sound of him shuffling and the door clicking closed made you grind your teeth when he didn't appear down the hallway.

Already packing up the food and placing it into the fridge carefully, you remained stoic to the fact that he had finally appeared behind you, wringing his hands as he watched you.

"babe ? "

"babe ? "

"bab-" "what."

you turn around on your heel, growling and if he were to open his mouth to say anything, steam would most likely begin to shoot out of your ears.

Lando stared at you, still playing with his fingers, "i wanted to- uhm," he gulped when you crossed over your arms, "say that i'm sorry." he whimpered.

"you're sorry ?"

"yeah."

"so," you guffaw, "i slave over the stove for hours, cooking, whipping, mixing and you think that i'm here to serve you when all you say is a 'sorry' "

"...no ?" he cringed, squeaking when you slithered past him towards the dining table and drag out a chair before taking a seat, "i don't see the big deal."

"you don't see the big deal ? " you pressed the heels of your palms into your eyes.

"no."

"no ? " you parrot, holding your face in fear that if your hands were to be free, you would strangle him.

"i really don't ."

Inhaling deeply, you attempt to find your inner peace. for both of your sakes.

"lando, it has been 2 weeks of you being back home. 14 days. 336 hours and god knows how many minutes. and throughout that time, you have not touched me," you put up a finger, "you refuse to kiss me nearly as much as you did when you were out of the continent," another finger, "and someone would think you need glasses because you never seem to be looking at me, ever."

Lando's mouth popped open, eyes darting around your face in search of a viable answer, "I-"

"and lord," you scoff, "when i go to make a romantic dinner, in hopes that you could sustain eye-contact for more than a millisecond. you go and forget that as well." covering your mouth, you dip your head down, avoiding his crumpled expression to sob into your hands.

"Are you crying ? "

"i'm not," you retort, sniffing obnoxiously.

"then what are you doing ?"

" they're called allergies. it's the pollen."

"babe," you feel his once distant presensce come and crouch down to your level, warm palms braced on your knees, "its winter."

"i know," you weep, pressing your forehead into his shoulder.

"i'm sorry my love," he pleads, bumping the crown of his head gently with yours, "im so so sorry, i didn't mean to."

you shake your head pitifully, "yes you did. you think i'm ugly" you blubber.

"no- what ? NO ?" he takes your face in his hands, smooshing your cheeks together, "you're beautiful and the only thing that's ugly is my behaviour, i should've paid more attention to you, and i didn't." Lando kissed you tenderly, fingers brushing your hair away from your wet face, "but don't you dare say that you're anything short of stunning."

"shmokay," you lisp, tongue poking through your puckered lips, "shu hungry ?"

you smile contently when he wipes your cheeks and pecks your closed eyelids, "yeah... but not for food."

ᡣ𐭩 ⎯⎯ MAX VERSTAPPEN 1

" come on schat, i said i was sorry." Max tries for what seeemed to be the fiftieth time.

" will sorry bring back the 2 hours i spent outside, looking like an idiot ?" you plant your hands on your hips, staring him down.

Max slaps his head a few times before slowly approaching you, padding his way past the bed, "I have a job, Liefde" he presses his hands together and aims his fingers at you whilst gritting his teeth.

"oh, and i don't ? " you smack his aggitating hands away from your nose, "someone call wallstreet, i've been trading illegally. since apparently, my liscence and MB- fucking - A was for nothing . "

"you being on the phone and playing with money, is different from me driving a deathbox every week. hoe kun je de twee zelfs vergelijken ?" [ how can you even compare the two? ] he eununciates.

You gasp, half tempted to smash your stilleto heel into his poised foot, but decide against it when he follows your gaze and peices together your attack, already shuffling his foot away.

"max- i will not stand here and take this from you. i trade stocks you race jumbo bumper cars."

your voice reaches a new decible as you attempt to get through his thick skull.

"now either you can apologise, or else i'm walking out of the door. because i am done explaining to you how to be a good boyfriend " you point outside the bedroom which you both were currently shouting in.

Max crossed his arms, challenging your threat.

"really ?" you ask, appalled but nonetheless collect your purse from the floor and begin to leave the threshold.

Max hums, catching your eye when you turn around, already pivoting at the corner of the doorway. He shrugs, moving to the bed to sit down and yawn nonchalantly.

You blink a few times before leaning back into the room to snatch up the keys to his pista from the dresser, "fuck you."

and with that, you left the apartment. and max, whose words were beginning to dawn on him.

your feet were beginning to ache with how much you were walking and it was almost 200% confirmed, that blood was begining to pool into the expensive interior.

the sun was starting to set from it's afternoon high point and you watched it whilst continuing on your journey down the sidewalk, already having charged an alarming amount of shopping on max's card, you were nursing a grande cup of the most expensive coffee monaco would offer.

The pista sat 10km away from you, full to the brim with your shopping, so when it began to approach you parrallel on the road, your eyebrows shot up and you were prepared to throw the steaming drink into the drivers window as it rolled down.

"schat- why is there so much shopping in here ? "max asked, guidinng the car dangerously close to the pavement.

"you should know since i charged it to your account. " you clutch your to-go cup to your chest.

Max's eyes widened as he pulled his foot off the accelarator to twist his body back and take in the sheer amount of bags that were pilled into the backseat.

"is there a problem ? " you blink at him innocently, still walking towards what appeared to be the public beach.

he turned back to you, irises huge as saucers before he cleared his throat and shook his head, "nope" his voice cracked, "not at all."

"good" you harumphed, "on my measly sallary, i couldn't afford to buy all of it. thankfully i had your card with me."

Max grimaced at your words, "please just get in, people will think i'm hustling you."

"i hope they do. imagine max verstappen 3X world champion pays for sex ? on the tabloids."

He scoffed and stopped the car, no longer entertaining your trek since your determined trot had morphed into an embarrasing limp and your eyes were starting to water.

"please get into the car, you're in pain."

"no-" you sniffed, wiping your eyes, "no i'm not, my only pain is that my boyfriend doesn't think my job is serious enough or something." you wave a hand over your face, lip wobbling.

You're too busy trying not to sob into your hands to notice that max had parked the car and was currently slamming the door shut to come comfort you, "no, no i do- i think it's serious."

his arms wrap around you as he guides your back again the car, hiding your face into his chest to kiss the crown of your head, "i'm sorry for getting mad and saying those stupid things. it was uncalled for."

you look up at him, chin resting on his shirt, "..and ?"

"and..." he huffs, "i'm sorry for not meeting you at the resturant for lunch and not telling you that i wouldn't be able to make it since my meeting ran over."

you smile at him, giggling under your breath when his hand comes up to wipe your tears away, "my job is super serious, you were mean." you pout.

"yes- i was mean."

biting your lip guility, you take a deep inhale, "and i shouldn't have called your job 'jumbo bumper cars' "

max laughs and kisses your lips softly, "yeah- i think i deserved it."

you grin against his mouth, winding your hands around his neck as he presses you against his chest, hugging you tighter, "yeah you did. but im sorry nonetheless"

[xgsturn]

good idea? - ( c.s )

summary: you couldn’t sleep so you decided to text chris asking if he wanted to smoke, it’s something you both always did and one thing lead to another.

warnings: SMUT, smoking (weed), oral (female receiving), pet names, (ma, baby), p n v (let’s not be silly wrap before u tap). probably more but idk

word count: 1,557

author’s note: this is my first one shot i’m scared LMFAOOO also i didn’t proofread sorry if there is any mistakes!!

please let me know if you want to be un added or added into the taglist. i had just decided to add my favorite writers!!

also my request & inbox are open 💓💓

-

i’ve been trying to fall asleep for the past 20 minutes. i’ve shifted and turned so many times i honestly lost count.

i open my eyes, groaning with annoyance. some nights i had trouble falling asleep, but there was always one solution to that problem.

i grab my phone, opening the messages app before quickly clicking chris’ contact.

this was a thing that happened every now and then. if one of us had troubles going to sleep i’d go over to his or vise versa. we’d smoke together and then usually get tired after that.

i hear a soft knock against my window signaling that he was here. i walked over to see chris sitting on the small balcony that was attached to the window.

i opened the window, climbing through feeling a slight breeze on my shoulders before shrugging it off.

“like i said you could’ve just used the door” i playfully roll my eyes at him.

“suck my dick” he replied back before sitting down on the ground. “when?” i said seriously. he raised his eyebrows and looked up at me.

“in all seriousness, you’re a life saver.” i sigh, sitting down, and relaxing my body.

he pulled out a fresh rolled joint from his sweatpants pocket, “i know” he smirked, putting the joint between his lips.

“lighter” he mumbles against the joint.

i toss him the lighter, watching as he lit it and inhaled before slowly blowing the smoke out.

i’ll never deny the fact that chris is hot, we had a flirty friendship from the beginning but nothing ever got to far.

he passes the joint to me, i relight it due to the wind causing it to ash out.

i inhale, feeling the smoke enter my lungs. i look at him as i blew it out.

the joint eventually dies out. i look over to chris, starting to admire the way the dim street light in front of him is showing off his features. his hair slightly messy, his eyes hanging low and red and fuck his lips-, he interrupts my thoughts.

“did you hear anything i just said?” he asks, his voice snapping me out of some trance i was in.

“sorry, what were you saying?”

“i asked if you wanted to go inside, it’s getting a little cold” he repeats himself, looking at me with his eyebrows furrowed.

“oh yeah, sorry just a bit distracted” i reply back covering my face from embarrassment.

as i’m climbing back into my room i feel chris’ gaze burning through me.

i get into my room and chris follows right behind me.

-

chris and i have been talking for the past 15 minutes. we both got onto our phones scrolling aimlessly, sitting in a comfortable silence.

i still can’t help to think about him, how his touch would feel on me, how his lips would feel against mine, how his long slender fingers would feel inside me.

i zoned out with a video playing over and over.

“what are you thinking about?” chris looked at me curiously through his low hooded eyes.

we were both still feeling the high effects.

what am i thinking about? i’m asking myself the same question. we have been best friends for years. i mean i’ve always found chris attractive, but tonight is different.

the way his body is leaned against the headboard, his biceps slightly flexing as he puts down his phone and crosses his arms, putting his full focus on me.

maybe it’s just the weed still lingering or maybe i just crave his touch.

“nothing.” i reply trying to act nonchalant but clearly not working.

“nothing, hm?” chris smiles loosely, as he looks down at my thighs then back up to my eyes, making heavy eye contact.

i follow his gaze down to my thighs, realizing how tightly squeezed they are.

i widened my eyes and look back up at him, before trying to relax the ache between my legs.

he puts his hand between my legs, spreading them open. he rotates his body, fully facing me now. his lips inches away from mine.

“is this a good idea?” i say studying his face for an answer.

“do you want this?” he replies in a serious tone.

“so bad but-.”

before i’m done speaking, i feel a hand on my jaw, pulling me closer to him and attaching my lips to his.

my body tenses from the sudden move but quickly relaxes soon after.

he bites my bottom lip softly, making my mouth part open giving him access to slip his tongue in.

he climbs on top of me, refusing to break the kiss.

our tongues fought for dominance before letting him win.

i tugged on his hair, signaling i wanted more. he groaned into my mouth, making me squeeze my legs around his waist. i couldn’t ignore the feeling between my thighs anymore.

“tell me what you want.” he spoke, trying to catch his breath. his lips pink and swollen.

i swallowed, “anything.” i feel desperate for him, wanting to feel some kind of relief.

“be more specific baby”

“need your fingers.” i mumbled quietly.

“good girl” he smirked, pulling my shorts down to my ankles. he slowly kisses my thighs going to the areas around my core.

he avoided where i needed him most.

“please.” i say while looking down at him through my lashes.

his hand still on the band of my pink thong. “can i take these off?” he whispered, looking at me. i nodded.

“i need to hear you say it ma”

“fuck, yes please” i practically beg.

he pushed my thong to the side before glazing one fingers over my entrance.

he slipped one fingers inside me slowly, letting me adjust. i moan into my hand muffling it.

he removes my hand from my mouth, putting it beside me. “i want your neighbors hearing how good i make you feel.”

i got even wetter after that sentence.

as i adjusted, i wanted more. “another one.. please” he listens to my commands and adds his second finger.

he started going faster, curling his fingers inside me and hitting that spongy spot each time. “f-fuck, chris.” i moan out, my fingers gripping my sheets.

he adds his mouth into the mix, sucking and licking my clit with such precision that made me start rolling my hips towards him.

my back was arching as he continued with his eyes fixed on my face.

i knew chris was experienced but i wasn’t expecting this.

my knees were already getting weak. “chris…” my hand going to his brown loose curls, tugging them. “i’m close.” i started to squirm underneath him.

“not yet.” he spoke against my cunt, sending vibrations through my entire body.

as soon as he said those words i couldn’t hold it anymore. the knot in my stomach eventually snapped, coating chris’ face and fingers with my cum.

“you can’t follow a simple rule?” his expression was stern and serious, while licking his fingers and mouth clean.

“i’m sorry, i couldn’t hold it” i reply, breathing heavy with worry all over my face.

he doesn’t say anything, instead he starts taking off his sweatpants following with his boxers. his dick springs free, hitting his stomach.

he was big and thick which honestly i wasn’t surprised about.

it was already leaking with pre cum. a vein coming from the tip to the base.

“think you can handle another?”

i move my eyes up to his face, “i- i don’t know if i can.” i stutter out.

“yes you can and you will” he says firmly.

his eyes darkened with lust, turning me on more.

i nod my head obeying him.

“which position do you want me in?”

“lay on your back so i can see your pretty face.” he slightly tilts his head and smirks.

the ache between my legs comes back causing me to clench my thighs again.

he notices and pushes his knee between my legs, leaving it against my bare cunt.

a pornographic moan leaving my mouth, as i try to grind against his knee to feel some kind of relief.

“be patient baby.” he strokes his dick a couple of times to fully harden it.

he removes his knee and bends down to push himself in.

we both moan feeling the pleasure that we were craving.

chris started thrusting his hips into mine at such a fast pace, and at this point i could cum at any minute.

he leans down and starts kissing my neck sloppily as he tries to remain at his pace.

“taking me so well.” he whispers into my ear.

“chris” that’s all i could say, my eyes rolling into the back of my head as my hips lazily jolted up meeting his thrust half way.

“hm? i fucked you dumb huh.” i nod as a response. i couldn’t even think of a sentence to prove him wrong.

he started rubbing on my clit fast. i threw my head back, my mouth hanging open but nothing coming out.

“cum for me ma.” he said maintaining eye contact, that was all i needed before i squirmed underneath him and came all over his dick. “that’s my girl” he whispered.

he groaned and let his head drop as came into me. i felt his warm liquid feel me up.

he dropped his body beside mine, turning to look at me. “holy fucking shit” he chuckled, catching his breath.

“so friends with benefits?” i suggest while also catching my breath. “fuck yes” he replies almost immediately, making me laugh beside him.

“here let’s go get you clean up” he says while getting up from the bed.

-

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[m-ayo-o]

regarding the recent megumi drabble.........hickeys.....lipstick marks.....all over his abs.....and then you go lower....and lower......

that's too hot tho :( i need u to live in my inbox please   said megumi drabble regarding his fine abs 18+ oral / afab reader x 21+ megumi 1.2k wc

After your boyfriend treated you to such a sensual ride on his abs, the following day you just had to repay the favour… you know he's not expecting it– his selfless nature means he only cares about making you feel good, even if he's stiff and bursting through his pants. 

But tonight you're still feeling that intense obsession with his body– as always– and it really isn't helped when he steps out of the shower, all hot with that dreamy, relaxed look in his eyes, his body covered in droplets of water with steam escaping the small room adjacent to your bedroom.

Your tapping and scrolling on your phone is soon forgotten when you look up in time to see him remove the towel from around his waist– you hold your breath and stare.

He gives his hair a rough towel dry then starts swiping the cotton over his body, collecting the beads of water that rest over his defined muscles. It's not like he's trying to turn you on… but everything he's doing just looks so sensual. He pats his pale skin dry and you admire the jet black hairs around his body– all trimmed neatly, how his arms flex, then the ridges of his adonis belt and further down… and you think god he takes care of himself. 

You know he works so hard... you want to show him how much it means, and how lucky you are to have such a perfect boyfriend. 

So you stand up and approach him slowly, slinking towards him in your cute nightie. 

“Megumi~?” 

“Mhm?”

“Did I ever tell you…” you pause and take the towel in your hand, “how pretty you are?” 

He snorts a little and releases the damp material, and you drop it on the floor, leaving him completely naked. 

“I'm not kidding,” you insist, trying your best serious face with the king of stoic expressions. You place your hands delicately on his chest and run your fingers up his neck, earning a little crack in the thin line of his lips. 

Starting to rise on your tiptoes, you inch closer to his face. 

“Can I show you, please, how perfect you are.. to me?” 

You know you tell him very often, and you know he appreciates that. Your kindness and sweet words have done wonders for his confidence (perhaps a little too much). But you love it when he accepts your love and compliments and you can tell he feels so comfortable in himself. And of course, he always shows you how much he loves you… but for you, he has started to open that pretty mouth of his and tell you. It means the world to you. 

But now it's your turn to take his approach. So you run your fingers into his inky black hair and bring him into a long and slow kiss. You take the lead, peppering the corner of his mouth then nibbling at his lower lip. You forget that you were still wearing your makeup from earlier when you see smudges on his lips. He won't mind. 

He opens up with a little sigh and you sink into one another. Losing yourself almost entirely, you step over to the bed and press his naked body down, until he's lying under you. Your nightie fans out over his hips and you sit right on the growing bulge of his crotch. It always makes you so excited that it only takes a few kisses and touches to get him hard. 

Your lips move down his body now, still taking it so slow, touching him gently and humming his name, repeating those sweet compliments till he's smiling like an idiot and telling you to stop. He's going to get such an ego if you're not careful. 

But you keep going, skimming your lips over his collarbones and chest, leaving pretty pinkish marks over his body. 

“Mm~” he likes how your lips feel on him… so warm and tender, but he wants a little more, “kiss me harder, baby~” 

And you can't deny your man's sweet request, as you open your mouth and swirl your tongue over his pec before sucking a little bruise on his body. Everything is so dainty with you, even in the way you leave marks on him. They're not like the wide and deep bruises he paints over your neck, but smaller and smattered over his body as he tells you to keep going. 

Your love bites and lipstick stains shower his chest, where you give his nipples a teasing suck, then dip lower over his ribcage, finally reaching the sculpted muscles of his abs. 

Feeling aware of yours and his arousal, you can't help licking and biting him sensually until your lipstick is all smudged. 

And he keeps moaning for more– you know he's feeling totally spellbound by what you're doing to him, so you kiss and suck your way down the ridges of his body till your fingers find those neat dark hairs between his legs. You take the base of his now full and perfectly curved erection in your hand and he shivers. 

“Uhh~~ mmh~” he gulps down a little moan– you surprised him with your assertive motions, knowing that's what he wanted. 

And it's his lucky day, because he doesn't have to ask you to keep going and you take his tip in his mouth and–

“Mmhnm~~ ththankyou, oh god that feels good, princess~”

He hums his praise and wraps his fingers in your hair till you're bobbing up and down eagerly. You wanna take him all the way back– you always try so hard till you gag on him. But, he just finds that even hotter– the sounds you make, the way your spit drips from the smudged pink stains on your lips, and how you have to pull away to gasp for air make him want to finish all over your face.

And he imagines that now, as he takes your neck and makes you swallow him down again and again, repeating this motion till you're tearing up. 

“Sorry- sorry baby~ can't stop– too– ahh– f-fucking good–”

He isn’t going to last long. 

“Gh-mhmm~~”

It's not easy, but you'll happily choke on him till you run out of air. And that eagerness, the way you keep nodding and taking him deeper and further back makes him harder and he starts to lose control.

“Fuck me you take my dick- so fucking well, princess-” 

“Mmmmhm~” 

You nod and swirl your tongue around him so sensually and he swears he sees you try to smile even with your mouth stuffed full and he can’t believe how beautiful you look and– 

“‘m-m cumming– “ he holds the back of your neck really hard, dragging your throat over his dick one more time as he spills his load. He uses your mouth to milk him slower and slower, until he lets go of your neck and you clean him up, taking time to suck on his tip to make him shudder with overstimulation before finally releasing him. 

You take the biggest breath and wipe your mouth, then collapse on his thighs, panting with a giddy smile on your face. You feel his fingers in your hair as he showers you with praise once more, telling you how good you were for him, letting him cum down your throat like that… and how hot you look with your makeup all ruined. 

You lift your head up, eyes scanning over his gorgeous body once more, to see those rosy prints of your lips all over him and you swear you could do it all over again.

megumi | m.list

[joyoushyuck]

06:23

Donghyuck is still sleeping when you wake up.

He looks peaceful, you think. Not a common sight, you'd even call his sleeping form the eighth wonder because a conscious Donghyuck is never calm. His cheeks are puffy, lips set in a cute pout, hair a royal mess. You thread your fingers through his unruly strands in an attempt to tame them.

Donghyuck's hand is loosely thrown around your waist but you know you couldn't wiggle out of it even if you tried. Not that you want to; it's cozier this way with his legs thrown over yours and body moulded perfectly to fit against your curves.

A few stray rays of light escape through your curtains, forming a magical halo around Donghyuck's face, giving it the softest of glows. Your finger traces his many moles. He looks ethereal like this. You feel an overwhelming amount of love for this man.

You want to protect him, even though the love bites painting his bare torso, the medusa tattoo just above his waist band and his toned biceps don't call for any protection. If anything, your frangible heart is the only thing that requires a lee from the whirlwind that is your boyfriend.

"You're staring babe," and you jump, heart thudding loud and so-not-proud against your chest. The room seems hotter than it was a moment ago, the peaceful ambience destroyed by his usual playfulness. He cracks an eye open and shoots a complacent smirk in your general direction.

"You don't have to scare me like that, you creep!" You huff, embarassed to face him. You try to get out of his hold; an impossible feat because he works out and you don't. So you take refuge among the fulffiness of the many pillows thrown over your bed.

"Says the one who was staring at me," is his smug reply, which earns a slap on his toned chest. Again, he's hardly affected by it. Atleast he has the decency to pretend it hurts.

Your breathing is still audibly heavy from the shock. He runs a placating hand on your back as a quiet apology. "Good morning," he mumbles, nuzzling his nose into your hair.

"Too late for that, don't you think," you spit in lieu of a reply, no real bite in your words. He chuckles, the sound arising from what you can only imagine to be the deepest parts of him, so low, so attractive, so domestic.

He kisses your hair with an obnoxiously loud smack and then giggles like a teenage girl because he's silly like that. Silly and annoying and so, so cute, his existence stimulates your most primal urges; you love him so much your chest hurts.

And you aren't scared to let him know what he does to you. "I love you." It's out of blue, and most definitely not a regular happening. You feel him stiffen, breath catching in his throat and heart beating infinitely faster. The playfulness drains out of him, leaving a sincere man who loves you with his entire being.

His hand on your waist pulls you closer. He kisses you properly this time, lips moving against yours slowly, like he wants to savour this moment as much as you do. When you break the kiss, he rests his forehead on yours, a hand holding your cheek carefully like you are delicate china. Precious. His.

"Me too," he says breathily. Donghyuck is looking at you - your eyes, nose, lips - searching your face. And when he finds what he's looking for, "I love you too, my pretty baby. So, so, so much."

-

Note

inspired by this post (@hugs2doie has some great works, make sure to check out the blog!)

My inbox is open. You can send in your thoughts/requests!

[sinfullyrosey]

Pushing Your Buttons

Lilia Vanrouge X Fem!Reader

Warnings: Fingering, Orgasm Denial, Oral, Semi-Public, Misuse of Magic

Got like three people in my inbox asking for more General Lilia, but I don’t do requests and this fic has been sitting unfinished for months now. So, no general fae, but current papa bat using phantom magic to mess with his favorite little, magicless human.~

I just realized I have written a male reader, gn reader, and now fem reader for this old fart. The triangle of smut is complete.

Also, I apologize in advance for my terrible text speech skills. I personally don’t type like that normally and struggle to do so for fic purposes.

You were slowly going insane. Absolutely bonkers. Throw you in a padded cell and lock away the key levels of mad. Couldn’t even concentrate on the simple tasks given to you by that aggravating crow without your mind immediately buzzing from the searing hot sensation between your nether regions.

Simply ignoring it had become impossible by this point. It has been nearly an hour now since it all started and nearly an hour have you suffered at the hands of that old bat. Running all over campus, delivering papers and whatnot, all the while your pussy is being played with like some handheld controller!

Another whine slipped past your clenched teeth once more as a particular spike of pleasure shot through you and made your stomach twist even tighter. You faltered, almost tripping on nothing along the pathway, and decided to stop and steady yourself as those fingers worked at your wet folds.

You heaved a shaky sigh and began to rummage through your school bag for your phone. Pulling it out, your knees buckling when you felt yourself growing wetter, the feeling of something dripping causing you to panic. So far you had been good to keep yourself together and, surprisingly, the fingers had been rather merciful, only occasionally grazing along your slit or palming at your mounds for only a few seconds.

But now they had just gotten bolder and more persistent, lingering longer against your folds, spreading your lips and pressing around your entrance. Sharpened nails playfully raking along your thighs or pinching your skin. At one point they even groped at the spot where your thighs and butt cheeks meet and suddenly squeezed them, making you yelp and startle the hallway full of confused students.

Thankfully, you were in a more secluded place on campus right now, free from the leering eyes of male students as they watched you slowly fall apart.

With trembling hands, you tapped on your messaging app to type up a response to the culprit behind your cruel torment.

‘Lilia plz knock it off’

You waited patiently for a reply. With some relief, you felt the hands temporarily release themselves from you, presumably to type a response back. A break that was short lived, however, as the moment your phone dinged from the incoming reply, you once again felt the hands begin to rub at you. This time, much rougher, and with purpose.

‘Now, why ever would I do that little one? The fun part has just begun.~’

As soon as you finished reading his text, you suddenly let out a pitched moan when you felt his thumb gently press down on your previously neglected clit. Your walls tightened as he rolled the sensitive nub in circles, fingers spreading your pussy open to play with the folds as your whole body shook.

You could definitely feel yourself dripping now, clear slick running down your thighs and soaking the top part of your thigh highs socks. You clutched the helm of your skirt, trying to pull it down and cover more of your front in embarrassment. You were really hating that he had removed your panties earlier on when he first started to tease you. Being so exposed an unable to keep from soaking yourself in your own mess was making everything so much worse.

You typed frantically the best you could while trying to ignore the sensation of his skilled fingers

‘U and ur stupid magic fantom hand thingys are drivin me crazy!!1’

You could only muffle your squeals and moans the best you could, looking around to make sure you were still alone as you stumbled over to somewhere with a bit more privacy. With the insistent prodding and palming of your pussy, you could only find a bench to sit down on to prevent yourself from falling and hurting yourself.

‘Oh, I just love to push your buttons dear! And this little one of yours is my absolute favorite to push and play with! So small. So cute. Just like you!~’

You let out a needy whine as he playfully pinched the puffy bud between his fingers, gently tweaking it and making your body tense up from the delicious sensation.

‘And it elicits such adorable sounds from you too.~’

Your legs trembled and shook as you spread them out more, giving him better access to your needy hole that was just dripping in anticipation for him. Two of his fingers easily slipped past your entrance, pumping themselves inside you at a leisurely pace. Waves of euphoria were crashing down onto you as your vision grew hazy from the pleasure.

The wooden bench was stained from your juices as you continued to leak from where you sat. you clutched onto the bench ends the more that coil twisted and tightened under his ministries. You were panting and moaning as his fingers found that special, spongey spot in you and began to abuse it with each pump.

All your previous responsibilities were long forgotten as Lilia fingered you with his magickly-produced phantom hands. His thumb still pressing and circling your overly sensitive clit as he worked you towards an orgasm.

Your toes were curling in your shoes, head thrown back as you felt yourself slowly approach your much anticipated release. Your body was impatiently bouncing slightly in the seat, moving to meet his own thrusts and pounding harder into your G spot. Your eyes closed tightly, vision blurring, and breath quickening when you felt yourself on the edge of pure euphoria.

And all at once, it suddenly stopped.

The phantom hands ceased their movements, slipping out of your warm hole, leaving your walls to clench along nothing. The coil was left to relax and simmer down, but still tight from the brink of release that was stolen from it. You blinked blurrily, vision still spotty as your head came to the conclusion of what just happened. Your pussy fluttering and still leaking, but empty and unsatisfied.

“Wah-?!” You slurred.

You quickly looked down, lifting up your skirt to see that the hands had completely disappeared. Your stomach dropped, panic rising as you stumbled to reach for your phone that you had tossed aside when you first sat down. Your eyes scanned to see if he had left anymore texts or if he was in the process of typing, only to see it completely silent. Your fingers quickly tapped away in desperation as anger flared within you at this cheeky old bastard.

‘Lilia wat the fuck?!1!’

You seethed as you saw the bubble with three little dots appear, indicating he was typing and very much still around, hands available, yet not putting them to good use. Like giving you that much deserved orgasm!

‘Oh my, just a few minutes ago you were telling me to “knock it off” and leave you be?’

‘Lilia Im literally going to explode’

You could just hear him chuckling at your response from wherever he was right now. You let out a huff, rubbing your thighs together to get some sort of relief, but to no avail, so you gave up. You were just about ready to call him to give him a piece of your mind when another text popped into chat.

‘Best be on your way and finish your errands. Don’t want to keep you waiting any longer now, dear.’

To end off his text and further punctuate his point, he used the phantom hand again to promptly flick your reddened clit, sharp nail scraping against it and sending a sudden shock wave of pleasure bolting to your core and causing you to double over. Your cunt clenched around nothing and you let out a desperate keen.

You glared angrily at his text, a few tears building up from frustration as you aggressively tapped away on your phone. You may be too pissed to call this irritating fae to yell his ear off, but you weren’t angry enough not to send him a few choice words.

‘plz plz plz PLEASE just let me cum already Vanrouge!!1 im horny im stressed and im about ready to make my way to diasomnia and whoop ur old creaky ass you fae fuck!1!!’

You continued to glare at your phone screen, waiting for your annoyingly charming fae lover to respond to your rather childish, but justified outburst via text.

‘Alright, if you insist.~’

Success.

You grin in victory, spreading your legs in anticipation of his hands lavishing you once more and finally rewarding you with the well-deserved orgasm. You felt the phantom hands on your thighs once more, spreading you further.

And then you felt the sensation of something warm and wet slowly lapping over your slit, spreading your folds and grazing over your sensitive clit. You let out a loud gasp, body tensing at the realization of what he was doing.

Your eyes widened as his phantom tongue began its torturous pattern of slowly lapping along your folds, before reaching your clit and sucking on it briefly, then starting all over again. You could feel your juices leaking out of you once more with each suck and lick, your phone dinging with incoming texts.

‘You taste absolutely divine, my dear. Still just as sweet and juicy as last time.~’

He made a point to dip his tip into your clenching cunt, lapping up your slick, then sucking up your release messily. You let out soft moans as your body convulsed under his touch.

‘In fact, I think I’ll enjoy this meal for a little while.~’

It was the sharp sensation of a pair of fangs gently nibbling on your poor clit that finally had you losing your mind as your moans grew louder and body helplessly approaching your orgasm once more. But every time you reached that edge, he would slow down or stop briefly until you settled down once more.

‘After all, you never clarified when to make you cum.~’

[wonderlandwalker]

Remember | Finnick Odair x Reader

THG Masterlist / Taglist / Inbox

Summary: The capitol has taken you from him, but he won't let them keep you. You can find pt. 2 here!

Content Warnings/Tags: Violence, bullet wounds, major character injury, blood, needles, angst, fluff, no use of y/n

Word Count: 4.0k

Requested by Anon: omg I love your writing and I have an unhealthy addiction to reading angst so could you please write something about the reader being with peeta and Johanna when they where taken by the capital and her being with finnick and recovering while she’s in district 13? 🫶🫶

A/N: The way I smiled when I saw this request I swear. This one has been in the works for a little while and I thought it fit perfectly. It is angst you ask for and it is angst you shall get. I'm considering writing a part two but I'm not sure how to yet. My bad habit of not proofreading happened again and with this one especially it was way too long so if I made any major errors pls do let me know.

The Capitol.

You are currently in the Capitol.

At least that’s where you think you are. You remember being in the arena, you remember running towards the general direction you last saw Finnick, remembering the marks you had gone by in case you had to take a different route. You remember seeing Finnick's face through the plantation, you’d be able to recall those features anywhere. You remember something hitting you from behind and falling to the ground, too caught up in catching up with him to check your surroundings. You remember crying out in pain, hoping he’d hear you. But the next thing you remember is the vision of him slowly going out of focus and losing consciousness not long after. 

At least that's what you think happened.

At least you can still remember, that’s worth something right? You remember your past, and you remember the reaping that led to the arena. The flood of relief that went over you as you finally found your way back to him. You don’t know what happened to Finnick, he was there too after all, but you had needed to split up early. Maybe he had been caught off guard too. Maybe he escaped. Maybe they never even found him. Maybe with him being the idiot he could be, he was probably already on his way here, looking for you. Just like you would have done for him, and he would have called you an idiot then too.

You would get out of here one way or another, that much you knew, but you needed to remember more, you needed to remember the last look on his face, you hadn't had much time to take it in, but you remembered the furrow of his eyebrows, the same expression he always had when he was trying to concentrate, you needed to remember that.

You knew that once you did get out of here, Finnick would be furious, telling you that you had been reckless, that you shouldn't have let your guard down, shortly after telling you how worried he had been. And it would feel like coming home.

Your mind becomes hazier, and it is harder to remember. You feel your head throbbing, and you move your hand towards it until you feel it can move no further. You open your eyes slowly, trying to adjust to the bright light that covers the room. You can't see much, can't move your head much.

You remember the rendezvous point you had talked about. You remember the quick “don't get yourself in trouble” and the kiss he gave you right before you parted ways.

You remember the layers of plants and trees you moved through, seeing some of them cut down, letting you know someone else had been there

But you know there is more, more that you missed. The stomped-out ashes that you ran past, you know you should have paid closer attention. But you can’t remember

You need to remember what happened. How you got here. Who got you here. If you really are in the capitol. But your mind doesn't want to cooperate anymore. The room is getting darker and darker, even though the lamp above your head is still dutifully buzzing

You wake up, you still remember where you are, or at least where you think you are. You still remember yesterday, was it yesterday? Why couldn't they just hang a clock in here? 

You look up, and you see a device set up, not too far from where you're lying down. You try to get a better look but the light above your head is too blinding to see anything else in the room. You don’t fully understand it until a man walks into the room with a video camera in his hand and an expression on his face that seems just a tad too happy. 

The camera starts blinking a red light, signalling you that it has started recording. The man has a sort of laser that he presses into your lower stomach, it doesn't breach your skin but it hurts like it does. It takes all your energy not to show him the satisfaction of it.

“Come on now darling, work with me a little.” He says after a while, changing the setting on the laser. The last bit of your energy is gone, and you can't keep the screaming from escaping any longer. It echoes off the white walls around you and when you hear yourself, you barely even recognize it. He seems satisfied with the result and finally puts the laser down. You look down but don't see any burn marks or indication of what has just happened.

He comes closer and you can see he is holding a sort of crowbar, but you're not sure why. You remember how you always left one outside your window in the districts, in case the wind had shut it and you needed to sneak back in. You remember Finnick finding out, giving you a serious, disappointed look, but not telling you to stop.

Before you can think of anything else, the bar hits you with full force, right above the spot he was previously focused on. You didn't expect it, and it knocks the little breath you had left out of your lungs. He hits again, not in the same spot, but close, he is very clearly aiming for your ribs. The switching between high-tech and old-school weapons has you puzzled, but you can't deny the result either of them has.

After a while, he stops, and with the added difficulty and pain that now comes with breathing, you are more than certain he just bruised a few of your ribs.

He walks back, taking the camera in his hands. He aims it at your face and you close your eyes to try and collect yourself as much as your current state allows. Your hair is a tangled mess and you are rather certain there is blood smushed over your face from the cuts you got in the arena. 

“Smile for the camera sweetheart.” He asks, even though it sounds more like an order than a request. You open your eyes to look at him. He is so close, and you want to drive your thumbs so far into his eye sockets you can feel the front lobe of his brain, if he even has one. But you can't do anything, no matter how much you want to fight, you are powerless here. You close your eyes again, trying to block everything out and remember.

You remember District Four, the way the light summer breeze would always carry the smell of the beach to your house, no matter how hard you had it, it always livened you up. You remember the first time Finnick tried to teach you how to surf, being so gentle with you no matter how many times you fell off it, always there to catch you again. You remember your last birthday, well, the day after, but you couldn't even complain about that. He had picked you up from your place and brought you to one of the lakes with him. He told you the story of one of his birthdays when he was younger, along with all the embarrassing details, but of course, it only endeared him further to you. You told him about the presents you got and all the people who came to wish you a happy birthday. You told him everything you could remember. You remember last seeing his face, maybe it was the last time you will have ever seen it. No. No, you remember it, but you’ll see it again, you have to.

“I’ll make sure your loverboy gets to see this, wherever he is, wouldn't want him to miss out on the fun.” 

Finn. Finnick. You remember Finnick. You remember when you returned from your first games. The black eye and broken arm you came home with. You remember how he lost it when they didn't immediately treat you for it. He would now either throw a fit over it for everyone to see or be so stoic in his thoughts even Johanna would get a little concerned.

You see the man standing up, walking to the table, and picking up something new. A syringe, it's a syringe. He walks over and pushes it into your upper arm, and before you know it, your vision turns black again.

You remember waking up to gunshots, and you panic. But after a few seconds, you figure out they’re not near you. There is, however, someone in the room with you, it's the same man again. He looks a little panicked, but you can’t figure out why just yet. The gunshots are becoming louder, and closer, and he seems more startled now. His arms drop to his sides from what he was doing and his eyes widen. Screams are echoing and you can hear footsteps.

You remember that pattern of paddling feet, and you recognize the second pair of steps too, but you can't remember much else.

The man gets closer to you, placing his hand over your mouth, pulling out a gun with his free hand and telling you to stay quiet. You never understood why people say that, it means he has something to lose, and you want to scream out, but your voice doesn't remember how to.

It's even closer now, right outside the door, and you can hear talking. You remember his voice. How he always asked you so sweetly how your day had been, the way he whispered sweet nothings in your ear as you fell asleep. 

You hear the door jiggle, and it makes you want to scream out for him, but your sore throat won't let you. For a moment you think that is it, you had your chance, and you let it go by. He’ll move along the hallway to the other doors and leave you here. But then you hear another gunshot, and they must have shot the lock, because right after you hear someone running into the door with an echoing thump as it breaks open. 

The man next to you had his gun pointed at the door, and he changes it to point at you instead. 

You were right, by the gods you had never been so thankful to have been right. Finnick walks in, and you can see the colour drain from his face as he does so. 

The man standing next to you is starting to get nervous, you can see the sweat starting to drip down his face. He must realize he has been matched, because there are more people by Finnicks side. But the man still has his gun pointed at you, and this isn't over just yet.

You can't keep your eyes open anymore, and when you close them, you remember. You remember your first kiss with Finnick, how nervous he had been at the time. He had been shaking a little and told you he was embarrassed by how much you got to him, but it only endeared him further to you.  He yells at the man to let go of the gun, he sounds nervous again.

But he doesn't let go, he decides to shoot. 

You hear the bullet leaving the gun, and for a single moment, you think it's over. The last thing you’ll ever see is Finnick, but he’s not himself. He’s upset, and even though you know he’s not upset with you, it still tugs at you. Except when you feel the bullet piercing through your skin, that's exactly what you realise. You can still feel it. He didn't shoot you right in the heart, he didn't shoot towards your head, he shot you in the abdomen. You’re not sure why, not sure why he didn't kill you, but you will never know, because not even a second passes as you hear a second gunshot, and he falls to the floor.

You can't seem to remember how to open your eyes, but you can hear Finnick rushing over and right as he reaches you, you fall. You fall into his arms and the memory of it gives you hope. Something comes in contact with your stomach, and the agony of it makes you want to scream out. You can feel him lifting you, and the shift of your body makes the bullet move, making you want to scream again. And if you remembered how to, you would have.

You know he’s talking to someone, but it sounds more like buzzing to you. You can only make out certain parts of the conversation, something about needing to leave, something about infections, and something about an aircraft. 

You can hear him talking again, and this time it’s directed at you. There’s a strain in his voice, and it sounds like he’s crying. It makes you want to comfort him, but you don’t remember how to.

“Please darling, just open your eyes."

But you’re afraid, youre afraid that if you open them, everything will turn out to be nothing but a dream, and he won’t be here anymore. But even if this is a dream, you need to see him. Even if it will turn into a haunted memory, you need to see his eyes looking back at you. It takes you some effort, but you open your eyes, looking at him. You can see tears flooding his face, you can see his lips moving, silent pleas coming from them for you to stay awake. He’s telling you how good of a job you’re doing, he's telling you to hold on. He promises that he won’t let anything bad happen to you ever again and that he won’t let go of you anymore.

You remember how he cried when you were reaped for the 75th games, and how you had told him everything would be okay, how you had comforted him, but you don't have the energy to comfort him this time. You remember hearing his sobbing, his shaking voice when you close your eyes again, not being able to keep them open any longer, even if you wanted to.

You wake up again, and for a moment you think it had indeed all been a dream, that you were right back where you had started, But then you remember the bullet in your stomach. You look down and see a bandage over it, even though it’s already soaked in blood. They must have taken it out. 

You try and concentrate, and you can hear Finnick talking to someone. “Just tell me, I know it’s bad but I need to know.” “Finnick, it won’t make a difference.” The person he’s talking to sounds desperate, and you remember how stubborn he could be when it came to you. 

But you don’t remember more, because your head starts to feel light again and you give in to the feeling.

When you wake up again, you manage to open your eyes, and you can see someone sitting in a chair next to the bed you're in. He’s slumped over, his face half pressed into the mattress and half into your stomach, both of his hands are holding onto one of yours. It hurts a little, but you don't mind, because it reminds you, even when you look away, that he is still there. You remember the way he always softly snores, and the way he wiggles his nose when your hair falls over it.

You think you're connected to a monitor, because something is beeping in the same rhythm you can feel your heart beating, and it gives you a headache. So you close your eyes again, and once again, you give in to the feeling of sleep that looms over you.

Since you had been brought to District 13, he has barely left your side. He keeps putting cold washcloths on your forehead to try and break your fever. It won't help, and he knows it, but no one has the heart to stop him. 

You haven't shown a single sign of life since they had found you. It was unsettling, the silence that filled the room, none of your usual laughter and banter there to replace it. 

It’s only when Finnick's head shoots up that the others notice it as well. The steady beeping that has been imposing the silence in this room for weeks picking up its pace. The beating continues to go faster and faster, your body shaking up from the bed in almost the same rhythm. But right before anyone can do anything about it, it stops. It all seems to stop, you stop moving, and the monitor stops beating.

He starts giving you chest compressions, and someone rushes into the room holding a small bottle, they fill a syringe with the clear liquid and inject it into your arm. Within a few seconds, your heart starts beating again. But it’s only after a minute of the monitor showing him a steady heartrate that he stops his actions.

It’s dark in the room when Finnick wakes up, and if it wasn't for the soft light and the beeping of the monitor, he would've thought he was dreaming, but it seems the reality won’t let him escape. He struggles not to fall back asleep, and every few minutes he does, but every time he wakes up startled again, scared that you’ll be gone if he doesn't open his eyes every once in a while. It was easy to see the toll it had taken on him. His posture was slouched, his face less well-groomed than usual. But no one could blame him, because they could see the way he looked at you, as if you were the sun and your dimmed light turned his world dark. 

He knows the chance you can hear him is small, but he feels the urge to talk to you nonetheless. 

“I don't think I can hold this in any longer. I remember some studies that have shown people in comas do hear what's going on around them, but maybe it’s for the best that you don’t, because you would never say yes.”

He continues but he feels his voice choke up, and he runs a hand through your hair to calm himself down, his other hand still holding onto yours.

“We talked about it once, I still remember every single word you said. You came at me with all your logical reasons for why it would be a bad idea. But what you never understood is that when it comes to you, I'm not able to think rationally, because my love for you will overpower anything else.” He chuckles softly as he recalls the memory he’s about to tell you next.

“I remember when I opened up to you for the first time. I had always held things to myself, but you were so calm as I talked to you. I thought for sure I had screwed it up somehow then. Everyone always tells me now how happy you make me, and they're right. Ever since you came into my life there has not been a single moment when the thought of you did not bring me joy, even when we fought my memories of you could still somehow bring a smile to my face. 

I remember when they showed me the video, they hadn't wanted me to see it, but you know how stubborn I can be when it comes to you. I saw you, I saw the way in which they were hurting you. And I started yelling, ironically enough in that moment, you were the only one that could have calmed me down. I remember yelling at them, fighting with them not to wait any longer, that they couldn't let you wait any longer, they had to have me sedating until they came to a conclusion."

He reaches into the pocket of his trousers, taking a small ring. It was his mother's ring, he had found it a while back and had carried it with him ever since. He had thought of moments to give it to you, but every time there was one, every time he was about to ask you, something had happened, something had interrupted him. But there was no one interrupting him this time. “I have thought about asking you this every time I see you, and I can't hold it in any longer. So when you wake up, not if you wake up, because I know you will. I know you will wake up because you have to. So when you wake up, will you marry me.” A little part of him had thought you'd wake up, that you’d answer him. Even if you said no, it would still be better than what's happening right now, because he didn't care if you'd say no, if you’d say you weren't ready, because nothing could be worse than the silence that followed him. And so he slid the ring onto your finger delicately, as if you were to disappear if he wasn't careful. He put the ring on your hand because he knew that even if it wasn't today, and it wasn't tomorrow, someday you would marry him, and he wouldn't let you slip away.

At first, he thought he was imagining it, sleep deprivation and desperation playing a trick on his mind. But then he saw it again, in the beams of morning light he could see your hand moving, as if it was trying to grasp onto something, trying to pull you back into this world. It woke him up in an instant. But it was all followed so fast, the way your eyes slowly opened, squinting at the light. Before you had even awoken for a second, he moved from where he had been right beside you in order to hug you. And he was about to get lost in the thought of your moving lips, tears falling down his eyes, about to get lost in a kiss full of built-up pain and desperation when he noticed, something was wrong. Your eyebrows were knitted together and the corners of your mouth turned down just a little. He looked at your expression, your body language, something was wrong. You looked vulnerable, you looked like you wanted to protect yourself from someone.

It was only when he looked into your eyes that he truly understood something was very wrong.

Your eyes looked as if you were in pain, but it wasn't a look of any physical pain, it looked as if something was endangering you, but he couldn't understand what it was. He slowly moved so as not to startle you and asked you “Darling, what’s wrong” And at first you didn’t respond, but when he kept looking at you, expecting him to answer you, you started to speak. “Am I supposed to remember you?” 

He immediately flinched back at the statement, his shoulder sunk and his eyes dimmed. Someone told him it wasn't uncommon for brain injuries to cause short-term memory loss after a coma.

So slowly, and surely, he made it work. But it was crumbling him down every time you didn't remember the unconscious acts of affection, so foreign to you now. A quick touch on your arm as he walked towards you made you flinch slightly as if his hand had been on fire. The subtle smiles he gave you when entering a room were now met with you looking down. The way that even though you were physically here, you really weren't. 

He promised himself, he vowed to himself that he would make you remember. That no matter how long it took, he would wait for you. He would wait for you to remember, make you remember. Because he had very quickly learned that he couldn’t live without you anymore.

Part 2: Trying to Forget

[lessi-lover]

romance II a.russo & l.williamson ~

since you all enjoyed so much :)

(seriously the inbox has been flooded with requests for more leah and alessia.) but it's fine i love you all x

★ a.russo & l. williamson

alessia

every night, since you shared the news that you had finally fallen pregnant, a couple of new rituals had taken place in your home. alessia, your girlfriend, had taken it upon herself to make sure that the baby knew exactly who her mama's would be when they were born. meaning, that every night when the sun began to set, alessia would would light a few scented candles and place them around your bedroom. which to your surprise, allowed you to slowly unwind after a long day on your feet. she would then select a playlist she had created for you on her phone, which was a mix of calm music you had begun to appreciate over the months.

the blonde would tear your laptop away from your hands, reminding you that you had already done a hefty amount of work, to which you would remind her that you weren't technically meant to be on maternity leave until next month. although, she never really listened to you anyway.

guiding you up the stairs, the girl would allow you to relax your tired limbs onto her own, rubbing soothing patterns into your swollen sides. whispering sweet words into your ear. making your way into your bedroom, alessia began to tear away your clothes, kissing each part of your body as she fully undressed you. there was nothing sexual about her kisses, they were solely an act of intimacy the blonde used to ground your mind after a harsh day in the office.

alessia smoothly directs you to the bathroom, flicking on the lights as she makes her way past. she gently pulled you into her arms, sliding her hands underneath your thighs, before carefully lifting you up and onto the bathroom counter. she grabbed your chin softly, turning your head towards the mirror.

alessia made it her personal mission to make sure that any thoughts you had about your body that arose during your pregnancy were ridden from your mind.

alessia was constantly reminding you how beautiful you were, the small affirmations flowing effortlessly from her lips, like clockwork for the blonde. the little gestures such as; writing you notes when she made you breakfast every morning, taking photos of your belly through each stage of your pregnancy, talking your ear off about what she imagines your baby to be like, - which actually just consisted of her describing what an amazing striker they would be and all the things she planned to teach your child.

she simply just did those little things that made you fall in love with her all over again.

"so beautiful, my beautiful girl." she murmured lowly, your heart fluttered as her arms wrapped tightly around your pregnant belly. you felt an overwhelming sense of gratitude for the blonde, and it only seemed to grow stronger each day.

she lead you to the shower, making sure the water was not too cold and not too warm, something you paid such close attention too. pulling you into her arms, she maneuvered her body tightly against your own, letting the water fall gracefully on you both. she shifted you, so that your back was facing the stream of water and she began to lay kisses onto your collarbones, hands working tirelessly at your tense shoulders.

she dug her fingers into your hips, trying desperately to release any tightness she could. she weaved her fingers gently into you hair, massaging a light shampoo into your neglected locks. you rarely had the time for any type of selfcare, and your girlfriend was adamant that if you wouldn't take care of yourself, then she would.

she covered your body in a thick body wash, lightly moving her hands over every inch of your body, leaving small patterns where she could. she was kneeling at your feet now, lifting her chin upwards, so she could look up and place kisses on your stomach. she gently massaged each stretch mark, her fingers doing wonders to release the tension in your swollen body. placing kisses on each mark on your body, she picked herself off the ground, before grabbing the sides of your face in a passionate kiss.

the blonde moved her lips against your own, her tongue exploring each part of your mouth, as if she had never before. she kissed you as if she had never before, but also as if she never would again. she wrapped her arms around your stomach, placing her manicured hand on your side, the other sliding down to clasp your hands togethers.

drying off, alessia made a huge deal that only she could dry and your baby off, as she apparently knew best. she placed yet more kisses to every part of your body, before kissing you sweetly on your forehead. she cradled your head in her hands, pecking your nose, which you lightly scrunched.

your girlfriend then again, lifted your pregnant body onto the counter, her hands laying dormant on your thighs. bending down to open the drawer next to her, she picked out a headband and placed it over your head, smoothing down your hair as she did so. alessia massaged a light moisturiser into your face, careful to stray the cream away from your eyes. she positioned her thumbs underneath your eyes, softly applying an eye cream, soothing away the signs of tiredness.

"all done, my love," the blonde whispered lightly into your hair, smiling up at you. you tried to get down off the counter by yourself, but instead a pair of hands wrapped around your thighs, and you were lifted into your girlfriend's chest.

alessia carried you into your bedroom, the rooms were connected, something you were grateful you had pushed for when deciding where to live. the blonde lifted the covers, gently lowering you onto the bed. she settled next to you, pulling the duvet up to your chin, her hand finding your waist.

she encased your body with her arms, attempting to pull you on top of herself. "no less, i'll crush you," a reference to your growing baby bump. "no you won't, i'm big and strong." she responded stubbornly. "did you hear that baby? you're going to be big and strong like me one day." the blonde asked, head propped up against your stomach. you rolled your eyes, tugging lightly on her hair to bring her up for a kiss.

"my beautiful girl."

leah

you felt your wife hum contendently into your sternum, her warm breath gently tickling your skin. you lay there wrapped in each others embrace, the blonde's hair dishevelled over your chest. the soft london weather just sweeping through the window, you felt the sun wash softly over your face.

it was a rare day off from both your relentless lives, your internationals and club schedule lining up perfectly to give you both a much needed break from your fast paced careers. being able to have a moment to pause was important, and something you would always make time for, no matter how hard.

you let out a content sigh, tangling your fingers through the hair of your lover, gently scratching her scalp. you looked down at the blonde, her arms wrapped tightly around your midsection, her hands laying protectively on your growing bump. ever since you had revealed to her that you were pregnant, she had become even more clingy than she had been before, it was rare for your body not to be connected to hers in some way.

leah's mouth pressed against your belly, a tender kiss that looked as if it was meant for the baby, even as she remained in a deep sleep. you watched her for a moment, the soft rise and fall of her chest against yours, the usual tightness in her face now relaxed.

you watched the clock on the wall, you eyes following the black arms as they travelled past each number. as the hours went by, the blonde slowly began to wake up, her eyelashes gently fluttering against your arm, which she has nestled her head into.

your fingers gently brushed along leah's back, the pale buttons of her pyjamas having come undone through the night. your sheets had enveloped you both warmly, and you lay together in the middle of your bed.

the birds outside were just beginning to sound their chirps, when the sound of insistent knocking jolted you awake, their melody falling silent against your window. muffled voices could be heard from the other side of the door, unmistakably belonging to your australian teammates, - steph and kyra.

"come on, girls! everyone's waiting in the car. let's move it!" steph's voice felt impatient, as her loud knocking on your door never faltered. "whatever lovemaking you're doing can happen tonight! hurry up!" the younger girl chimed in, and you could hear a faint painful grunt, as no doubt she had copped a jab to the arm for her comment.

of course you thought it was a smart idea to include your house in the communal key chain, even if leah had tried desperately to talk you out of it. you claimed it was a safety measure, to which she replied, "the only hitlist you're on is mine baby." but now, you were certainly cursing yourself for your stupid judgement, of course this was bound to happen.

"sorry stephy!" you yelled out apologetically, struggling to you remove yourself from your wife, who was determinedly sticking to your body. the incessant knocking ceased, as the older girl gave her last warning and went to settle in your living room.

"come on love." you said sadly, rubbing you hand up and down her arm. leah, however, was in no rush to leave, her cheeky nature meaning she was always ignoring the likes of her teammates, and often getting herself into trouble.

"darling, we really should get up," you whispered, running your fingers through her hair. "just a few more minutes," she mumbled, her voice muffled against your skin. you chuckled, knowing all too well that leah's 'few more minutes' could easily turn into an hour.

she groaned softly, the sound vibrating against your pregnant belly as she buried her head further into it, seeking refuge from the long day of team bonding that was waiting outside her door. you giggled at her, your hand cupping her hair, as you curled inwards. her muffled voice came through, heavy with sleep, "do we really have to go?"

you chuckled softly, running your fingers through her hair in an attempt to rouse her. "come on, babe, the team's waiting. and you know how steph gets about us being late." but leah was acting stubborn, her body heavy with the desire to stay curled up in bed with you. the warmth of the bed and the presence of your growing baby seemed to weigh her down, anchoring her in your open arms.

again the blonde groaned, head planting carefully into your stomach, trying to relish in the last moments of the day she would have alone with you. kyra's voice rose again from outside your room, this time a hint of warning in her words, "we're going to start counting down, leah! don't make us come in there!"

gently, you nudged the girl, encouraging her to rise. "we can't keep the team waiting," you reminded her.

this elicited a playful grumble from Leah, who finally lifted her head, her eyes meeting yours with a sleepy yet affectionate gaze. "fine, fine, we're up, don't come in." she conceded, though her movements were slow and exaggerated as she chuckled at herself. with a gentle push and a shared smile, you both began to untangle yourselves from each other.

"alright, let's do this, baby" leah said with a stretch, straining her neck to place a small kiss on your forehead, before bending down to give one to your bump as well. together, you quickly got ready, the both off you flitting around your room, brushing your teeth, rushing into clothes and leaving a few minutes to finally kiss your wife.

"my beautiful girl." she whispered against your cheek.

_______

upon opening the door, steph and kyra greeted you with mock frustration but quickly broke into smiles.

"it's about time," steph said, her tone light and teasing, the girl pulling you into a hug not soon after.

kyra, with a laugh, added, "we thought we'd have to break down the door, to find the married couple."

the drive to the day's activity was filled with laughter and light-hearted banter amongst you all, the older girls copping most of the heat from the younger players, which led to a multitude of bets and dares being carried out. vic, had dared frida to stick her tongue out as a celebration for the next goal she scored, whilst katie who took a more gusty approach, had bet alessia that she could 'neck' more beers than her, the younger brit immediately agreeing and shaking her hand.

you watched as your captain, -kim, rolled her eyes at the silly antics of her teammates, quoting the competition was, "a load of rubbish." you and your wife being seperated the moment you stepped out the door, yourself being forced between your teammates beth and jen, but you didn't really mind, they kept you entertained enough.

although, you felt your eyes wander over to one grumpy blonde, squished between viv and laura, sitting with a scowl on her face, as she felt herself drift away from the two girls' conversation.

the team had planned a series of fun and engaging outdoor activities, designed to foster teamwork and let off some steam. leah, usually sporting a more competitive approach when it came to things like this, seemed more relaxed today, her hand finding yours as she gave it a gentle squeeze.

"are you okay?" she whispered, her concern evident in her soft gaze. "just excited," you replied, giving her a reassuring smile.

the first event was an escape room, encouraging teamwork and patience, things you always strived for in your career. as leah navigated the course with her friends, her ability to work with others shone and watched as she began to enjoy herself more. you stood on the sidelines, waving off your friends with a poor excuse of a sore stomach, well you weren't entirely lying.

lunch was a picnic in the park, a moment for everyone to relax and bask in the rare english sunshine. the time had finally come, you and leah had decided it was the perfect time to share your news.

leah stood up, gaining the attention of your teammates. "can we get a photo please girls?" many of them agreed, moving around so they could all fit in the frame. you and leah volunteered to take the photo, you guiding everyone around and leah taking the photo.

"everyone ready?" your wife asked, much accustomed to the many 'photo blinkers' in her friend group. a string of nods rippled, and you both settled behind the camera to take the photo.

"one, two, three, say we're pregnant!" leah shouted out, her finger hovered over the camera button. as the words left her mouth, the faces of all the girls around her transformed into expressions of shock and disbelief. the camera clicked at just the right moment, capturing a perfect photo of their reactions.

"everyone, we have some special news to announce," she began, her hand instinctively resting on your stomach. you stood up beside her, feeling a mix of nerves and excitement.

"we're going to be parents!" you announced, your voice filled with joy.

the reaction from the team was immediate and heartwarming. cheers and congratulations erupted, with all your teammates rushing over, enveloping you both in a group hug. "we're so happy for you both!" exclaimed Steph, her eyes shining with happiness.

kim, always the team leader, added, "that's wonderful, girls! how far along are you?" she asked. "two months along, we were waiting for the perfect moment to tell you all. you responded, looking up at your wife, a look of pure admiration on your face.

"was waitin' for you to pop out a mini leah," an irish accent filled your ears, you turned over to see the brunette with a huge grin, her comment sparking a conversation of "what a mini leah or y/n would be like."

_______

the drive back home was quiet, with both of you lost in thought. leah's hand rested on your thigh, and you clasped your hand around hers, rubbing your thumb over her knuckles. you couldn't help but let your mind wonder to what the future might hold, after all you were about to start a family with the girl you loved the most in the entire world.

as you arrived home, leah made her way over to your door, helping your tired body out of the car. the blonde weaved her hands around your waist, as you unlocked the door, resting her chin on your shoulder. she helped you up the stairs, changing you out of your clothes before gently crashing you both in bed.

as the sun began to set, signaling the end of an unforgettable day, leah wrapped her arm around your waist, pulling you close to her, mirroring your earlier position. "today was perfect, exactly how i wanted to break the news." she whispered, kissing the top of your head. you nodded, resting your head against her shoulder. "It really was. i can't wait for the baby to come."

"i love you, leah," you whispered softly, feeling the warmth of her embrace enveloping you.

"i love you too," leah replied, her voice a gentle echo that soothed your busy mind. her arm tightened around your waist, and she nuzzled her head into your belly. in the quiet comfort, you felt time pause, as the two of you just lay contently in each others arms.

suddenly your phone chimed with a series of messages. sighing dismissively, you reached over to your bedside table, finding a flood of texts from the girls on the team. they were buzzing with excitement, each one requesting to be chosen as 'aunties' to your unborn child.

"can I be the cool aunt who teaches them football tricks?" one message read, from a groupchat with vic and kyra.

"official babysitter here, i demand first dibs!" another chimed in, this time caitlin requesting to be an auntie. and not a second later did her girlfriend katie message you, demanding that she be called 'auntie katie'.

"wait, I'm baking the first birthday cake, no arguments!" a third declared, your good friend lia showcasing her love for baking, that she wanted to share with your baby.

leah peeked over your shoulder, reading the texts and laughing softly to herself. "looks like our baby's going to have a starting eleven of aunties," you said, eyes sparkling with happiness.

"yeah, and the most amazing mom in the world."

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Rest Had Seemed The Sweetest Thing.

Bucky's slowly learning that love isn't a finite resource. aka, Bucky's first Christmas.

pairing - bucky barnes x female reader

warnings - none!! just tooth rottingly sweet fluff <3

word count - 1.7k

author's note - based on these two requests!! i'm also trying a new post format... what do we think?? I promised you i'd get a couple of xmas fics out before the 25th... I lied. apologies!! forgive me. title taken from the poem The Owl by Edward Thomas.

as always, if you enjoyed, please reblog!! reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics. thanks, angels <3

masterlist. inbox.

He whispers the words, timid and reserved, directly into your ear as if he's worried someone else will hear. It's only the two of you sat on the couch in your shared apartment, but Bucky's nervous.

Your head whips around in shock, trying to play it cool. Failed.

"Are you... are you sure?"

"Yeah, I'm sure."

You grin, big and blinding, the beams of it radiating into Bucky's bones. It settles into his muscles, eases the tension from his shoulders.

You try not to make a big deal of it, try to keep your excitement under wraps. But you've been waiting for him to say those words for almost six years.

"I want to do Christmas this year."

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

He hates the cold.

No, he's traumatised by the cold.

Years spent frozen, genetically modified and locked in a glorified freezer. Every gust of wind, every flake of snow reminds him of the darkest days with no light to be seen. His blood may run hot, but he feels like his heart is yet to thaw. He debates moving to the desert at least ten times a day.

Then he looks at you. How happy you are when winter comes around. The way your face lights up when it snows. And he figures that if it brings you this much joy... maybe he can tolerate it.

He bites back the chill, grits his teeth at the icy breeze, ignores the shudder of the cold all the way down to his bones. He grins and bears it, because you love it. He thinks you don't notice.

You do.

You've known ever since you met him. His demeanour changes when the winter comes around. He gets a little tentative around the autumn time, as if he's preparing himself for the worst. And then the first snow falls, and he's different. Guarded. Careful. Reluctant. He puts a fake smile on his face and pretends, but you're nothing if not completely in tune with everything Bucky Barnes.

You never asked, never pried. Just stood steadily by his side, regardless of the walls he'd placed around himself. Around his heart.

He broke down one night, wrapped up in bed with you. A chill had blown through your old apartments rickety windows and unearthed old memories, ice running into his veins. He was sure his tears were frozen as they dripped down his face.

You understood him better, since that day.

You've tried to suggest moving in subtle and not so subtle ways, but he won't have it. He knows this is your home. He knows you like it here. He knows he can stay, if he works a little harder on himself.

So, he tries. Every single day, he tries. And that's all that matters.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"Okay, so... ground rules. Hit me, Buck. We do this on your terms."

He thinks for a moment before turning to face you.

"I want it to be just us. No one else."

"Done."

"And I don't wanna do the whole Christmas dinner thing. Feels like too much all at once."

You fight the urge to burst into tears at how easily he's communicating with you, how effortlessly he's enforcing his boundaries. You've come a long way.

"Done. Agreed, by the way. Fuck Christmas dinner. We'll do our own thing."

He grins at you, leaning in to kiss you slowly, tenderly, leisurely. Like you have all the time in the world.

"I want to get a tree. And lights. We don't have to do all the ornaments and stuff, but lights would be nice."

"I have an artificial tree in the back of the storage closet... is that okay?"

"Perfect. I don't want to stand on all the pine needles, anyway."

Laughing, you shift closer to him, tangling your legs together on the couch.

"And no gifts for me."

"But Buck-"

"Angel. I don't want anything. I have everything I need sat next to me."

You roll your eyes, but you can't wipe the smile off your face.

"This isn't fair, suddenly."

"It's plenty fair. You stress too much when you buy gifts, and this is going to be a stress free Christmas. Understood?"

He hooks his fingers under your chin, forcing you to look at him.

"Understood," you whisper, swinging your knee over so you're straddling him. "Stress free."

Bucky tilts his head up to kiss you, gentle at first, then firmer when you roll your hips into his. He's a little distracted, admittedly. He got you to promise not to get him anything, but made sure you wouldn't ask the same. His mind runs a mile a minute, trying to wrack his brain on what kind of gift to get for the love of his life, the person that saved him and continues to save him every single day.

He comes up empty, but lets you kiss the thoughts away for a little while.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"My mom taught me this specific way to hang lights on your tree. Look, grab this end and I'll show you."

You're both still in your pyjamas, fire roaring, a jazzy Christmas melody playing from the radio. You decided you wouldn't put up your tree until the day before, to save Bucky from feeling overwhelmed. It's worked, so far - he looks plenty relaxed as he chuckles and rises from the armchair.

"You're tall, so hold this above your head so they don't tangle."

You work diligently, bottom lip pulled between your teeth as you concentrate. Bucky's happy to watch you, fighting the smile off his face every time you sigh in exasperation. Eventually, you step back and admire your masterpiece, satisfied and content.

"It's beautiful, baby," he whispers, wrapping his arms around you from behind.

He presses a kiss into your neck, then another, then another. Your eyes slip closed, and you sink into his embrace, feeling more at peace than you ever thought possible. You spend the evening by the fire, lying on the rug, room illuminated by the lights on the tree.

It's perfect in every way.

✵  ✵    ·　 ✵ 　　 *  · ✵

"Merry Christmas, angel."

"Merry Christmas, Buck."

His hand finds yours under the duvet, pulling you in close. You tangle yourself around him like lights on a tree, all encompassed by his warmth.

"What's the plan for today, Sergeant?"

He presses a kiss into your temple, propping himself up on his elbow so he can see you properly.

"I say we make some breakfast, spend all day on the couch, and then maybe make some dinner? I know we said we wouldn't do a traditional Christmas dinner, but it'd still be nice to take the time to cook something."

"That sounds perfect."

In the kitchen, you make pancakes with copious amounts of maple syrup, strawberries and pieces of banana strewn across your plates.

"My Mom made us pancakes every Christmas morning, you know."

"You've never told me that."

"I know. I kind of refrained from ever talking about anything festive, because I didn't want you to feel guilty."

"For making you miss out for so many years?"

"I haven't missed out, baby. I chose not to do Christmas because I love you. And that love takes precedent over everything else."

Bucky kisses you then, across the kitchen table, full and golden and so full of love you almost fall off your chair. He tastes like blueberry jam and syrup and coffee, and you wish you could bottle it up and stick a little under your tongue when you get homesick.

"What changed?"

"Hmm?"

"Why now? I would have been content to never do Christmas again, if it made you happy."

"Because I realised something, a couple of months ago. We were sat in the park, and you were laughing at that dog chasing the boomerang. The sun was making you glow, like some sort of angel, and I just knew. I can do anything with you by my side. I can't put my future on hold because of my past."

You're fighting back tears as you look at him, so happy and content. You never thought this was possible, when you first met him.

And here you are.

Celebrating Christmas, showing him your childhood traditions, making pancakes like your Mama used to. You're sat at the kitchen table as the snow falls outside and the warmth that Bucky's love brings is keeping the chill at bay.

It doesn't get better than this.

"I got you something," he murmurs almost sheepishly.

"Bucky-"

"Don't yell at me! I know it makes me a hypocrite, I know I said no gifts, I know."

You roll your eyes, but watch his every move as he gets up and leaves the room. You finish your breakfast and put both of your plates in the sink, turning on the tap so they can soak. When you turn around, Bucky has returned.

He's on one knee.

There's a ring between his fingers, glinting in the winter sun. You're both still in your pyjamas, warm and full, not quite having shaken off the heavy embrace of sleep just yet.

It's perfect.

"Maybe it's cliche to propose on Christmas day, but... I want to replace all of my old memories with new ones. Memories like this."

You walk over to him, kneeling down in front of him so your eyes are level.

"You've taught me what love is, baby. And I can never repay you for that. But I can certainly try. Every day, I can try."

There are tears dripping down both of your cheeks, Bucky's grin matching yours. The two of you are overwhelmed in the best way, unsure of how to process the gravity of what you're feeling.

"Marry me, baby. Let's do this forever."

You lunge forward and smash your lips to his, laughing into his mouth.

"Yes," you breathe when you pull away. "God, yes. A million times yes, Buck."

His arms wrap around your middle as he picks you up, twirling you in circles around the kitchen, both of you shrieking with joy.

Bucky slips the ring onto your finger when he puts you down, both of you tilting your heads to admire it.

"I love you," you murmur, leaning up to press your foreheads together. "The cold can't touch you now, baby. This love will warm us forever."

The cold can't touch him now. Love will warm him forever.

@lizzystuffsthings <3