#so I am projecting on characters I like

[easeinjazzout]

hits him with the beam text transcript in alt (boy do i hope i did it correctly)

[bacchuschucklefuck]

january month of yuugi

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Get that man (pregnant)!

[theoldkyokodied]

[Hi Dennis. How was the lion feeding?...?]

This has been something I've been working on for quite a while now, as some people who look at my insta story might know, but I'm finally done!! those text messages from s14ep5 are so unhinged, they haunt me every goddamn day. To drop "i love you so much" just to follow it with what essentially is a "no homo.. for u... even tho u r so hot and i like you so much!". exploading them with my mind into a million pieces, okay?

[random-cockroach]

[dykedvonte]

I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.

I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?

The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.

[scissorcraft]

post-canon siffrin design!!!! might change it up more of course but!!!! yeah!!!!

he does HAVE something to represent odile and bonnie too,,, it's not just his partners (romantic & queerplatonic), he's got his family too, i just don't know where to put them yet :) so for now assume he is carrying them in his multitude of pockets!!

[ganondoodle]

(WIP)

a rough basic idea for a centaur character i have had floating around in my head for a long time, it doesnt fit with my main OC world but wouldnt call this another project bc its literally just "what if centaurs bc centaurs kinda cool" with little story or worldbuilding other than its all centaurs lol

(the only background is really a vaguely noble couple wanting to hire a new soldier/guard after their previous one is retiring but not being able to afford any highly valued ones (build, color, training- the kind of things horses are often priced with) so they opt for the cheapest to hire they can find which is this enormous draft centaur (vaguely based on the blue roan coat type) that no one wants bc he doesnt talk and never really responds otherwise to being talked to (so he dumb haha (he isnt)- to be clear he DOES what he is told but he doesnt like, sign an ok, he just "stares" and then wordlessly does it), doesnt have any well known parents and is too big to fit comfortably in most buildings, also a little unkept (mostly just in his fur looking pretty rough, not caring much for treating scratches etc- though its not that clear in this sketch)

over time said couple both falling for him, completely seperately/not aware the other also has, bc they actually started to get to know him instead of just going with what he was "sold" as and treating him accordingly (badly)- leading to him being caught in a very awkward "triangle" he doesnt know what to do with and just goes along with everything (hes very calm and stone faced in public but privately socially awkward, always been extremely lonely/isolated and never had to deal with any sort of interest in him as a person instead of just how much he can pull/work until collapsing)

[demaparbat-hp]

Oh, Lala...

[fakesorbet]

The Bad Kids + Summer drinks

[otome-dissection]

Idk man I just think that mizu/ena5 and its progression was really beautiful actually. I just think that the release of the ena5 song was also really beautiful and kind of the nail in the coffin for me and I haven't been able to get the event(s) out of my head all week and that I kind of want to talk about it, actually.

It's about being hurt so deeply and continuously that any kindness that could be offered to you manages to feel like a sin, that it makes you crumble and shatter but for all the wrong reasons, not because of the newfound safety, not out of relief, but something worse and more deeply ingrained in you than kindness ever was. It's about carefully measuring the distance at which you keep others away from yourself, to ensure that it never happens again ("To save yourself the trouble", if that makes it easier).

It's about realizing that the people you've been spending all this time with are drifting closer, that they just might bump up against the unsightly parts of yourself that you've tried to keep locked away, it's about turning around and sprinting at full speed and slamming the door shut and holding onto the handle behind you to stop it from turning, because you're as frightened of the possibility of another wound being inflicted on you as you are of the possibility that kinder, gentler hands will reach out and smooth over the exposed scar. It's about hating eyes that judge and silently condemn you as much as you hate eyes that simply see you and take all of you in without scrutiny, because no matter what they're looking and they're looking at you and they know that your hand's on that door handle and they know that you're hiding something because, as much as you try to keep it shut, they've seen through the crack that you foolishly left open.

(The prominence of eyes in Bake no Hana, specifically eyes looking and searching, and finally landing on you, the viewer, Mizuki, is so fucking. Visceral in my opinion. Every character in the MV stares at the viewer in a deadpan, almost judging way. Even though Mizuki knows deep down that niigo won't really hate them, won't judge them, she just can't stand their kindness either; any gaze directed at her is a loss, another prick in their skin. It screams "don't look at me" while making sure that you know, with horrific certainty, that they're looking for you, that you're being watched. You can't go outside, can't leave your room, because they're searching for you, and while that should be reassuring, to you it's anything but).

It's about not wanting to be dissected, whether it's with hands that want to pull your organs apart or stitch them back together because no matter what they're there, and they're getting frighteningly close to your heart. It's about blinding yourself and covering your eyes to it all because seeing means exposure and exposure means they're taking something from you and you can't do anything about it, much less take it all back, much less have a say in the matter. Everyone's just taking and taking and taking and you wish you could just be alone. You wish everyone would just disappear and you could live in a world all to yourself, for only yourself (but is that really what you want?).

It's about the way that, near the beginning of the Yoka ni Mitoreta MV, Mizuki and her loneliness is represented as a dark, splotchy stain in the shadows. No colors, no patterns, no way to clean it or wash it all away, just raw ugliness marring a blank canvas. It's about the way that Ena reaches out to it anyway, the way she startles when the glass shatters just when she finally starts reaching forward, the way that the rest of the MV/song represents her searching for and reaching only further out to Mizuki, even if the broken shards of glass will only cut her fingers, potentially leaving scars.

It's about how, in every way, subtly, directly, consciously, and subconsciously, Ena shows that she fucking cares.

It's about the way that Ena lets Mizuki have autonomy, despite the situation being so horribly out of their control. And it's such a delicate thing: If she really wants to, Mizuki can take the opportunity to just run away, keep running forever, repeat the cycle over and over, and maybe she'll just destroy herself with it again, but it can't be denied that it's something important to them, something she can't quite live without just yet, their means of survival. Mizuki's autonomy is their identity, it's her tailoring her own clothes and choosing her own ribbons and styling her own hair the way she does. Ena letting them have that is as much about trust as it is about understanding that Mizuki of all people should have this right, when control was something stripped from her throughout so much of her life. She couldn't control how she was born, how people look at her or why, can't control what they think of her; lacking control has only left Mizuki vulnerable to the cruelties of others, has only caused them to suffer, which is why it's so important that it's given to them now.

She had the control to make the choice to see niigo's welcoming love and run away instead of staying, and she has the control to make the choice now whether she wants to keep things the way they are or take a step forward to be at their side again. She has every right to have it, and I think the fact that Ena realizes and respects that, even if it's subconsciously, is really beautiful (there is an entire fucking Verse about this in the new song and just. God Look at this. It's so caring, unconditional, and for fucking What. I think there is something to be said about how much Ena is willing to put aside for Mizuki, and maybe deep down it isn't healthy, but for now I'm just kind of in awe)

It's about how insanely patient Ena has been this whole time. Mizuki says that she basically lied to Ena's face about telling her their secret, even after Ena said with such conviction that she would wait for Mizuki as long as it takes, and Ena is just kept waiting and waiting and worrying like this seemingly indefinitely. It's about how Mizuki danced around it, avoided it, kept the distance, straight up ran when she was finally pushed, but Ena still chased anyway when she saw that she couldn't wait anymore, kept chasing just enough to intervene and get a straight answer out of Mizuki when she really needed to, but still leaving her enough space to leave if that was truly what she wanted. It's about how relieved Ena is the moment that Mizuki finally says outright how much they want to be with her and niigo, how much she wants to try, how much more light Ena's voice sounds when she grabs her hand, relieved, the way that the relief she feels can be felt through the music, throughout the entirety of Yoka ni Mitoreta, the way that warm colors always follow her when she chases after Mizuki, just to hold onto her and stop her from running away completely.

It's about how that careful combination of Ena's directness, Ena's persistence, Ena's warmth, her patience, her bluntness about her feelings, the way she chases and holds on but not too tight and her regard for how unsafe and exposed Mizuki feels actually works and breaks it all down. It's about how she really did reach through to Mizuki, despite the thorns and broken glass shards and nearly-unfulfilled promises, the way that Mizuki did finally let her turn the door handle and step through to see what she'd been hiding all this time, the way that Mizuki's hand, limp, when Ena first grabs onto it, shifts to hold hers back as they cry in the face of Ena's gentleness.

Despite how harsh Mizu/Ena5, and even Ena herself as a character can be (or at least was in the very beginning of pjsk), everything is somehow gentle and warm in the end, blindingly so. And you know what, I think that's beautiful. And what's even more beautiful than that is how Mizuki allows themself to crumble and shatter under that kindness, that warm light, but this time, finally, out of relief.

On a final note, I just want to say that I also appreciate how all that didn't have to solve everything. The scars haven't disappeared, haven't gone away, and Mizuki knows that their desire to run hasn't gone away forever, and maybe it never truly will. But for now they've calmed it, at least a little. She's learning to allow herself to be seen, learning that when someone's fingertips brush over their scars the way Ena's did that it's only out of care, and that maybe taking in that care and allowing herself to feel kindness and safety is okay. They're safe, for now, somehow. They're learning. They're trying. And I think that's cool :)

[ribbittrobbit]

the ball bouncing around in his office

(not seen: any one of the bad kids or his mom, nodding along)

[voidmetal-alloy]

She isn’t going to be a huge part of this au but I adore her and I’m insanely proud of this redesign.

I’m gonna make a proper lore post soon cause I had like a HUGE influx of ideas and did kind of an overhaul of the backstory to make it fit a little better with the kind of story I wanna write, until then I’m gonna keep posting little design snippets and concepts, I really appreciate that people have been interested in this au even thought it’s kinda taking me a while to make proper content for it. It’ll still probably be a while before the proper comic is something I can consistently work on but I’ve got some other things planned in the meantime :)

[cometblaster2070]

so i'm going to go fucking insane because for a while this aspect of malenia's character design has been bothering me and making me think I'm seeing things and going fucking crazy.

the aspect in question is malenia's left arm:

when i first saw malenia's arm my first thought was oh okay they're probably just bandages or some sort of wraps.

but then you look a bit closer and like

idk about you (because i might be losing it) but it seems like the mesh of whatever the fuck that is very clearly melded with her skin in a way/it looks like it's going into and then emerging out of her skin (which is HORRIFYING to think of I won't lie).

and once again i thought i was going crazy and seeing things because surely these were just meant to be wraps or bandages like the ones we see in the scene of her fighting radahn right?

and then the thought of the needle came to my mind. along with something malenia says in her cutscene before we fight her.

"my flesh was dull gold"

huh. now isn't that interesting.

this would imply that in order to stall the rot from consuming his sister, miquella made a plan to sew unalloyed gold into malenia's skin using his needle in a last-ditch attempt to save her arm.

(granted it's funnier to imagine he just sticks it in her arm and goes okay great all done! and that's probably the canon way it went but)

the thought of the sheer pain malenia must've gone through during this process, to be honest, and the thought of the guilt miquella must've felt at having to force his sister to endure even more agony just to help her is just sad.

and all of it is done just in an attempt to salvage what they can of her and hope that more can't be taken.

edit: btw when looking at malenia pre-bloom and pre-losing her needle it looks like there's a proper layer/cover/whatever it is around her arm up till her knuckles making it seem like an actual covering or layer on top of her skin and what not, but when we fight her post-bloom and post-losing needle it appears like some of the layers have either flaked or fallen away and that reveals that it's actually meshed with/into her skin.

[late-tothe-party-07]

The next time Jason says Bruce did nothing when he died, I want him to be cut off with the declaration that Bruce did. Bruce did everything.

Bruce wanted the Joker dead. He shot down the Joker's helicopter even when Bruce was still in it. He wanted to see the Joker's body and finally know his boy didn't have to worry about another innocent person being caught in the Joker's crossfire. Even from the grave, he knew Jason would worry. He'd never stopped. Not once. Not even broken and bleeding did Jason stop worrying about someone else (even driven wild with Pit Madness, he still had worried about the kids in Crime Alley).

I need Jason to know how much Bruce loved him, to the point of almost starting WWIII. I need him to know the desperation in Bruce's eyes. How his hands shook and it wasn't with the horror of seeing himself sink further into the dark of The Bat. I need Jason to know the day he died was the day a piece of Bruce died with him. I need Superman to tell Jason about how little he'd recognized his friend. How he almost wasn't able to hold him back; The unshakable Batman. I need Tim to tell Jason how the scars got on his hands from catching Bruce's gauntlets too often. "That's enough." he'd say, sounding older than he was. The gauntlets were sharp (to cut rope in the event of capture, or tanglement). They cut through Tim's gloves like nothing. The purse snatcher would be in critical condition but he'd live. Later, Tim would think of an alibi for the scars. To everyone he met as Tim Drake, he said, "I picked up glass and tried put it back together."

I need Jason to know Bruce did everything. Even things he shouldn't have done. Things he would be ashamed of later on, praying to the shadows of his room that his sons would heal. Not forgive him, but heal. (Bruce never quite learned how to heal, did he? He only knew how to fight. All his kids could tell you that. Fighting for them or against them, chasing back the nightmares or becoming his own. Bruce knew how to fight in many ways, but he never got the hang of looking at his demons and letting them go.)

I need Jason to know Bruce loved him to the point of destruction. I need him to know how gently his body had been carried and then how quickly those hands were bloodied and torn.

[apostatefeverdream]

ugh im such a sucker for the physical consequences of being over-exposed to the fade/powerful magic. love love LOVE the idea of The Horrors having permanent side effects, especially when the pc is a non-mage.

the warden has bouts of vertigo and nausea from their time in the fade. from sudden sense memories of being a thousand times smaller or infinitely huge, of the body being not a body or more flame than flesh. their skin feels wrong, itches, is too cold, too warm, isn't theirs. the world swims in front of them during a fight, limbs suddenly too large and clumsy to move against the spinning. there's an ache too, like growing pains, that meanders along their legs and up their arms. it's a constant, low hum of pain, that builds and builds into a shrieking agony. the blight has already taken their blood, the archdemon their dreams, and now the memory of the fade takes their body.

hawke has dreams within their dreams. they'll wake up and will go about a completely normal day before waking up again in the real world. it doesn't happen often, but happens enough that there are moments where nothing feels real. where time stretches long and slow before them. how long has this been happening? are they still in the dream? are they still asleep in their bed in lothering? they're laughing in the hanged man and is it real? they're wiping the blood of a bandit off their face and is it real? they're kissing someone and is it real? the chantry explodes and is it even real?

the inquisitor has a chunk of the raw fade embedded in their arm and it's agonising. it pulses at odd intervals, sick waves of pain that feel old and unmistakeably hungry. in the fade itself, the anchor is so much worse, raging and spitting like it's trying to pull the muscles in the inquisitor's hand apart. after adamant, it remains an angry, snapping thing that causes a permanent tremor. their skin cracks, little green fissures along their palm and fingers that leak sickly pale light. the pain worsens, an incessant, shuddering agony that makes even the lightest of touches unbearable. even after solas takes their arm the pain remains, sharp and slick. an impossible wound that was never meant to be theirs and it will haunt them forever.

after the events in elgar'nan's temple, rook starts to get regular migraines. two ancient elven gods bellowing at each other in their head leaves their ears ringing and their words muddled, and a throbbing pain twists up their neck and into their head. there are medicinal herbs, of course, but they leave rook feeling syrupy and stuffy, and they can't afford to slow down at a time like this. they're the leader of the veilguard and the world is ending, what's more pain to work through? and so they do, sleepless, addled and sending people to their doom. pushing and pushing until everything hurts. and then they are tricked into the fade and varric and nothing, nothing could ever hurt as much as that.