#so I might bring her and she's a complete wreck

[mashupofmylife]

For reasons that I now can't remember, my therapist (who mainly works as a child psychiatrist) and I ended up discussing the fact that I still sleep with stuffed animals. I was not expecting him to end the session by telling me that he expects to see pictures of them (or, for that matter, for him to reveal that he immediately assumed that my bed was completely filled with stuffed animals).

[soaps-mohawk]

Cherry Red, Crimson Blood

Chapter 36: To The Sea

Summary: It's time to move on. You're not sure where you're going exactly, but anywhere is better than Texas

Pairing: Poly 141 x reader

Word Count: 7,816 words

Warnings: ANGST, injuries, medical stuff, descriptions of pain and injuries, brief discussion about strangulation, mentions of PTSD and nightmares, so much crying, Alpha/Beta/Omega dynamics, Alternate Universe, angst, a very little sprinkle of comfort, language, mentions of medications, still very heavy emotionally

A/N: Not actually a lot of warnings for this one. It's a lot of dialogue and inner monologues. Not a lot happens, just mostly setting the scene for the next chunk of the story. Bring tissues though, the last part of the chapter emotionally wrecked me but also might be the best thing I've ever written.

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It’s warm outside. 

Not even the shade from the building can completely shield you from the dome of heat that seems to surround the base. It seeps into the concrete and asphalt that lock it into place, trapping everyone in a bubble that may as well be an oven. It’s always hot in Texas, though. You hate it. You’ve been spoiled by the cold, rainy seasons in England. You’d gladly take that over Texas. 

You’d take anything over Texas. 

The heat prickles at your skin, your arm starting to get sweaty in the sling. It had been Dr. Keller’s idea to keep your shoulder as still as possible so you don’t continue to cause yourself pain when you move. It still hurts, but at least you won’t instinctively try to use your left arm now.

Despite the warmth, there’s still a chill deep in your bones. The warmth of the pain medicine has worn off and you’ve been left with the perpetual ice that has seemed to coat your insides. Dr. Keller says it's the stress giving you a fever. Every nightmare, every flashback sends your body temperature spiking, your heart beating right out of your chest. You’re not out of the woods yet. It can take a long time to recover from that level of distress and the omega taking over. You almost regret it, but there was no guarantee you would have lived either way at that time. You did what you had to do, and it did work out in the end. 

But at what cost? 

Dr. Keller’s phone buzzes in her pocket and she pulls it out, staring down at the screen for a moment. “Kyle wants to come by.” 

You don’t want to see him. You don’t want to see any of them. 

“I think you should see him. Even if it’s just for a moment.” She squeezes your hand. “I’ll be right here.” 

It’s a predicament. Dr. Keller supports your decision to keep them away, putting some distance between all of you for the time being. Yet, she also says being close to your pack will help your healing. Having your pack around will help your omega settle once again. She needs that safety, that security before she finally lets go completely. 

You don’t want to be close to them, but you may not have any other choice. 

You sit there in silence, picking at the fabric of your sweatpants as you wait for Kyle’s arrival. Sweat has started to bead on your back, the day only getting warmer and warmer as the sun moves higher in the sky. You want to go back inside, back into the cool air conditioned building. You want to crawl back onto the hospital bed and lay there for the next few hours. 

You can’t. 

Footsteps approach, but you don’t look up. You know who it is. You don’t want to see him. 

“Kyle.” Dr. Keller greets. 

“Christine.” He says back. It still throws you off, hearing Dr. Keller's first name. She'll always be Dr. Keller to you. Kyle turns his attention to you, still standing a few steps from the bench you're perched on. “Hi, love.” He says. The affectionate nickname almost makes you wince. You don't look up at him. You don’t want to see his face. “I wanted to stop by and see how you’re doing.” 

You don't move, don't give an answer. You don't have an answer to give anyway. You shouldn't have to give an answer. 

He lowers himself onto the bench, sitting as far away from you as he can. “It’s hot today.” He says, adjusting his hat. Always wearing a hat. Maybe that's why he and Price work so well together. 

He stares at you for a long moment but you don't bother moving, your gaze still on your sweatpants. They're starting to get a bit warm, even with your perpetual chill. 

“I’m not here to apologize.” He says, breaking the silence. “You’ve probably heard enough apologies to last you a lifetime.” He shakes his head. “Words can’t fix what we did. Nothing can fix what we did, how we left you there. All we can do is give you what you need, try and make you as comfortable as possible.” 

Tears burn your eyes as you listen to him. He's not wrong, an apology won't fix what happened. No words will ever be able to fix what they put you through. You're not sure there's anything they could do that would make up for it. An apology still would have been nice, despite the fact you know how guilty he is. Their avoidance of you, their willingness to give you such space in an unknown place just proves how guilty they all are. 

That doesn't make things hurt any less. 

You slowly turn away from Kyle, angling yourself towards Dr. Keller. 

He doesn't say anything further in that regard, taking your movement as an answer to his non-apology. He leans forward instead, resting his elbows on his knees. “I just wanted to let you know that we’re getting ready to leave soon. We’ll be heading somewhere safe, somewhere quiet and secluded. I think you’ll like it.” 

Dr. Keller had informed you of that earlier after she went to speak to them. They've decided what to do, what's best for the pack again. You might have protested, except for the fact it meant you were getting to leave Texas. Where exactly they're taking you, you're not sure. You just know it's not Texas. 

“I want you to know that we’re here if you need us.” He stares at you for a moment longer before pushing himself up to stand. 

If, not when. 

Maybe they're finally getting the message. 

Dr. Keller stands, touching your right shoulder gently before she steps away with Kyle, speaking quietly with him, but you can still hear every word in the nearly silent space around you. 

“In an attempt to remain a neutral, professional party in this situation, I feel it would be appropriate for me to tell you not to beat yourself up too much about this.” Dr. Keller says. “The unprofessional side of me has many words I’d like to say to all of you.” She clears her throat. “That being said, on a positive note I can say you’re all doing the right thing for once, prioritizing your omega and fulfilling her needs, even if her needs require you to leave her alone for now. I know it’s hard, I know every instinct is screaming at you to help her, but just take comfort in knowing you are helping her. You’re doing the best thing you can do for her at this time.” Dr. Keller puts a hand on his arm, squeezing it gently. “Even if it is tearing you up inside.” 

“Thanks, Doc.” He says. 

“I’ll see you soon.” She says, patting his arm before she heads back towards your bench. 

You turn your head just slightly, not missing the way Gaz lingers for a brief moment before he turns his back on you, walking back down the sidewalk. 

It hurts. 

You want to cry with every swallow. No matter how much you chew, it doesn’t ease the pain of trying to swallow solid food. Even the worst sore throat you’ve ever had pales in comparison to this pain. Tears burn in your eyes as you eat, unable to refuse this time in favor of choking down some liquid nutrients. Even liquids make your throat ache, but they are easy to chug to get it over with at once. 

This feels like torture. 

Dr. Keller looks guilty as she spoon-feeds you the soup. Chicken noodle, something simple and easy but still something with some substance. It makes you think back to when you were sick as a child, your mother dutifully feeding you homemade chicken noodle soup until you reached the age you could feed yourself. 

You do feel like a child again, unable to even hold the spoon. Well, you could hold it, but it would have come at the expense of some burns from how badly your hand was shaking. 

So instead you sit here, being spoon-fed soup you can barely stand eating. 

“I know.” She says as a tear finally falls, your inhale shaky from the ache in your throat. “You need something in your system for the sedative. It’s a long flight and you’ll be sick when you wake up if you don’t have anything in your stomach. That’s going to hurt a lot worse than eating now.” 

Yeah. You’ve already figured that out. 

“Strangulation is a tough thing to survive.” She says, dragging the bottom of the spoon against the edge of the bowl to wipe off any soup that might drip on you. “Then again, so is getting shot, and distressing to the point of your omega taking over.” She holds the spoon up to your lips, and you’re tempted to refuse. “You’ve survived a lot, more than most could. And to look this good after...” 

You blink up at her, teary eyed and sickly looking, exhausted and bruised. Your left eye is still almost swollen shut, and your hair is tangled perhaps beyond saving, tied up in a bun at the top of your head. All just reminders of what you survived, all reminders of what happened to you. Of what was allowed to happen to you. 

You’re not quite sure when the last time you had a real shower was either. 

“I know.” She says, spooning more soup into your mouth. “You might not feel like it, right now.” 

“I want a shower.” You say, your voice still hoarse and cracking through your throat. A real shower might solve a lot of problems for you right now. It won’t fix much, but being truly clean would make a lot of things feel better. 

“I wholeheartedly agree.” Dr. Keller says. 

You give her a look. You don't smell that bad. She should know, she’s the one that cleaned the blood off of you and the one who gave you the sponge bath this morning. 

She gives you a look back. “I meant it would be nice to take a real shower. Once we get where we’re going, we can work on the logistics of a shower.” 

Right. You can’t exactly stand for a long time on your own, not to mention the problem of only being able to use one arm without bringing blinding pain upon yourself. That’s where the pack would come in handy. 

The thought of one of them seeing you vulnerable like that, putting their hands on you right now makes your skin crawl. 

A shiver runs down your spine, your body shuddering uncontrollably. You grunt as your shoulder screams in pain, another electric jolt burning straight through your nerves and down through your feet. Fuck. You mouth the word, squeezing your eyes shut. It makes your stomach churn, the soup starting to burn a path back up through your esophagus.

“Breathe for me.” Dr. Keller says, putting a gentle hand on your right shoulder. 

In and out. You focus on your breath, the only thing you can do without feeling like you’re going to go insane from the pain. It’s all you can do in this situation. It’s the only thing you can do at all. Breathe. Just keep breathing. 

Sometimes you don’t want to. 

The pain passes as it always does, leaving behind a subtle ache that will linger until the next flare of pain. It’s a constant, never-ending cycle that you can’t escape from. Weeks, Dr. Keller had said. It can take weeks to heal. You’ll be stuck in this cycle for weeks and weeks. What if it never heals? That is a possibility. It’s always a risk with any injury. 

What if the rest of your life is like this? 

You’re crying again, hot tears blazing a path down your cheeks. They won’t stop, they never stop. There’s a constant stream down your face, even in your sleep. You’ve woken to find your face and neck damp from the never ceasing flood of tears. 

How you can’t wait for the time to come when you have none left.

You’d welcome the numbness at this point, greet it like an old friend and invite it in for tea. Anything over the pain and tears that won’t stop. The depression-fueled numbness that had filled you when Price and Gaz left, then Soap and Ghost would be a welcome relief at this point. Anything would be better than the pain. 

You almost wish you were in a coma right now. Then you wouldn’t feel anything at all. 

Dr. Keller puts the spoon back into the soup bowl before rolling the table to the side. She puts a hand on your head, gently stroking your hair as you cry. The room is silent aside from your sniffles, Dr. Keller not having to say a single word. The silence is almost a blessing. You’re tired of hearing words, of hearing people speak. There’s nothing anyone can say that will do anything to help you, to comfort you, to make it better. 

There’s nothing anyone can do to make it better. 

You’re so tired of being like this. 

The sedative is kicking in before you even reach the airfield. She can see the way your head is drooping further and further forward in the car, your body jostling without any complaint. It had started kicking in before you even got into the car, as you offered very little resistance when Kyle helped her mauver you into the front seat. She chose Kyle out of everyone to help her in hopes it would be easiest on you. Your claimed alpha’s beta is a good place to start in rebuilding the bonds within the pack, and his calm demeanor certainly helps. He is a caretaker through and through, that beta trait prominent above the others in him. He would have made a good medic, had he gone that route. 

Your chin drops to your chest as the car comes to a stop in front of the plane, your body slumping to the side against the door. 

“She’s out.” Christine says, unbuckling her seatbelt. 

“Makes this easier.” Kyle says, getting out of the car. 

They maneuver you into the wheelchair, Christine easing your head onto your right shoulder to avoid aggravating the left. The less pain you’re in when you come out of it, the better, though pain will be unavoidable. Kyle pushes the wheelchair up the ramp of the plane, Christine following close behind. She’s glad she gave you the sedative before you left the med center to avoid as much pain as possible. She almost wishes she had given it to you earlier, as getting you into a sweatshirt had been a battle of its own. Though, the longer it stays in your system, the longer you’ll sleep through the flight. The longer you sleep through the flight, the longer they can delay the inevitable emotional storm of being enclosed in a tight space with your pack. 

If you’re lucky, you’ll be out of it long enough for them to reach the cottage without incident. 

John is waiting near the front of the aircraft, his eyes watching carefully as Kyle helps maneuver you into a seat. Even with the turmoil in the pack bonds, an alpha will always feel protective over their omega. There’s some things that can’t be undone, even in such a fragile state. Some instincts can’t be unlearned, no matter what. 

“I gave her a sedative.” Christine explains as she gets you as comfortable as possible in the seat. “It won’t last the whole flight, but it’ll take a while to wear off regardless.” 

“Is that more for her or for us?” John asks. 

“Both.” Christine says. “Mostly for her. It helps with the pain of moving around, but it will also keep her calm in close quarters like this.” 

“Here.” John says, handing her something. It’s a blanket, brand new by the feel of it. “Johnny made a store run this morning. It’s going to get cold in here, so he got the warmest one he could find.” 

Christine takes the blanket, the fabric thick and soft in her hands. It’s a touching gesture, speaking volumes of their desire to still care for you despite everything, their willingness to do what they have to, to keep the pack together. “Perfect.” She says, carefully draping it over you and tucking it around you before John gets you secured in the seat. 

“It’s going to be a long flight.” John says, taking a step back. 

“It is.” Christine says, pulling out her thermometer. She takes your temperature, letting out a hum at the number that pops up on screen. “I need to monitor her temperature.” She explains as John gives her a look. “It’s been spiking when she gets stressed.” 

“She's not quite out of it yet, is she?” John asks.

“Not quite.” She says, putting the thermometer back in her bag. “I’ve only seen two omegas successfully come back from that point, and I know the number across the board isn’t very high. It takes a long time for the body and the brain to get back to normal.” 

“And on top of everything that happened...” 

She stares up at him for a long moment. “She’s very strong. I knew she was a fighter, but to come out the other side even where she is now...” Christine shakes her head. “I didn’t want to say this at the time, but I was expecting the worst. When that call came in about what state she was in...” She bites her lip, holding the emotions back. “Her resilience and fortitude is what kept her alive. That and Simon’s courage to do what needed to be done.” 

“I know.” John says, looking past her. “We all owe a lot to him.” 

Christine puts a gentle hand on his arm. “You’re doing what’s best for her. No matter how much it hurts, no matter how much it goes against every instinct you have, it’s what she needs.” 

“That’s all that matters to us right now.” John says, staring down at her hand for a moment. “There’s nothing else we can do, so it’s time we start putting our priorities where they should have been the whole time.” 

Christine gives him a small smile. “I’m proud of you for that. It takes a lot to unlearn the things you’ve been told since the beginning.” 

The corner of John’s lips twitch before his face falls into the emotionless mask he’s been wearing for the last few days. “It’s about time we get our heads out of our arses.” 

“I can’t blame you totally.” She shrugs. “We were all just doing what the initiative was telling us to do. We couldn’t have known. There wasn’t any room to question it.” 

“I wish we would have figured it out sooner.” He sighs. 

“Things might have been worse if the truth did come out sooner. If you started digging into the initiative too soon, Shepherd might have gotten antsy and taken more drastic measures to stop the truth from coming out entirely.” She glances down at you. “I think this was all inevitable.” She turns her gaze back to John. “What happened, happened. None of us can change that. All we can do is keep moving forward with what we have right now.” 

He stares at her for a long moment. “The more time passes, the more I’ve come to realize why Kate chose you for this position.” 

The corner of her lips turns up in a smile. “Well, I am rather good at my job, which, among other things, involves advocating on behalf of omegas.” 

John huffs. “Wish we would have listened sooner.” 

“You can’t change the past.” She repeats, looking down at you again. “But you can change the future.” 

You woke from your sedation about four hours from Helston. 

Well, ’woke’ might have been too strong of a word for it. Your eyes opened, but you were still hazy, movements sluggish and entirely unaware of the world around you. You floated between sleep and awareness for an hour before finally gaining consciousness completely. Awareness took quite a while to return, though. Not until they were moving you to the car from the plane. 

Even still you’re groggy, slumped against the door in the back seat of the car. You blink slowly, eyes unfocused as you stare out the window at the blur of green passing by. 

“How is she?” John asks from the driver's seat, glancing up at the rearview mirror. 

“Cow.” You say, blinking slowly as the car passes a field of cows. 

“Still out of it.” Christine answers from the back seat where she's sitting next to you. Your response might have been enough to answer that. “Better than being in pain, though.” 

“How long will it take for her to get out of it?” Kyle asks. 

“Hopefully she’ll be more lucid by the time we get there, but it could take a few hours for it to completely wear off.” Christine says, wiping a bit of drool from your chin. “Probably not a bad thing. This is a big change, and with everything that’s happened, it’s going to take some time to settle in.” 

“Things are going to be rough.” Kyle says. 

“Yes.” She agrees. “Being enclosed in a small space with the people you want to see the least in the world isn’t an ideal situation. It’ll be an adjustment for everyone. I trust all of your abilities to adapt, though. Just don't go in expecting things to be the way they were.”

John's hands tighten around the steering wheel, his knuckles going white. Kyle cracks his window open, prepared for the thickening of John's scent in the air. Christine knows she hit a nerve, but it needed to be said. Even if you were open to forgiveness right now, even if they had chosen to go after you right away, things still wouldn't be the same. Things won't ever be the same. It is their fault deep at the root of it. Those cameras were put up because of them, you were taken because of them. You were chosen for the “initiative” because of them, because Kate thought you'd fit in well with them. Their decisions shaped your life, and will continue to shape your life. 

Can you ever come to forgive them? Christine likes to think so. She has the hope that they can put in the work and regain your trust and earn eventual forgiveness. She knows you'll allow them to try once the initial hurt and emotions begin to fade, once the two of you put in enough work to start processing the trauma around the events that happened. It will take time. Probably a long time. 

She'll be there every step of the way. 

“Ashley did some shopping for us, picked up some stuff to get us until we can get into town.” Kyle says, looking at his phone. 

“Good.” John says, his shoulders starting to relax. “Should wait a couple days before going. Get settled in.”

“She's still working on cleaning up. Probably still be there when we get there.” Kyle says, putting his phone back in his pocket. 

“That's fine. We’ll probably have to utilize her a bit.” 

“Doubt she'll complain.” Kyle says, looking out the window. “Be thrilled to have something to do besides work.” 

You let out a quiet groan, shifting against the door. “Hurts.” 

“I know, honey.” Christine says, carefully adjusting your left arm. “I’ll give you more pain meds once we get to the cottage.” 

“We’ll be there in half an hour.” John says, glancing up at the rearview mirror again before turning his eyes back to the road. 

The half hour seems to take the longest as you continue to become more and more lucid and aware. The pain sets in first, your brain picking up on those signals before anything else. John’s knuckles are white around the steering wheel as you begin to whine and whimper around every bend in the road and turn he has to make, every jostle of the car. Every instinct in his body tells him to pull over and comfort you, but he can’t. It’s more important to get to the cottage, and there’s no guarantee you’d even let him. It might make things worse. 

The last thing you need right now is for things to get worse. 

Christine breathes a sigh of relief as they pull up to the cottage, glad she can finally get you somewhere more comfortable. You’ve been in far too many uncomfortable positions today, moved around too much. She would have liked to keep you in Texas a couple more days, but she knew as soon as you were able to travel, the better. The sooner they could get off the grid, the better. 

The sooner they could get out of Texas, the better. 

Kyle is getting the wheelchair out of the trunk when Johnny and Simon pull up, not having been far behind. They likely took a turn around the back roads to ensure no one was following and to keep things from looking too suspicious. 

Christine keeps you from slumping out of the car as she carefully opens the door on your side. You’re more awake than you were, blinking up at her with almost startlingly aware eyes.

“Crutch.” You pout when she pulls the wheelchair closer. 

She gives you a look. “Honey I'm not sure you could even stand right now.” You may be more aware, but that doesn’t mean your body is working as it should.

You let out a defiant noise as you attempt to get your legs out of the car, trying to hide your grunts of pain and discomfort. 

She's tempted to stand there and let you try, but she knows all hell will break loose if she lets you fall. She's not willing to take that risk, not to mention it will cause you more pain to get you up off the ground. 

“Come on,” She says, stopping you before you can get your feet under you. “Nice and slow.” 

You let out a quiet growl of indignation but you allow her to help you, your legs trembling as she eases you up. Kyle is there with the wheelchair, getting it as close to you as possible so she can sit you down quickly. 

“Ow.” You breathe, eyes pinched closed as you breathe through the pain. 

“I know.” She says, patting your good shoulder lightly. She's glad she put you in the sweatshirt before you left Texas. It's chilly outside, chillier than it was further inland a few days ago. 

It's hard to believe it's only been a few days since you were taken. Barely even a week. So much happened in such a short period of time. It feels like it’s been weeks since everything started, but then again, it had been weeks since John and Kyle first left. It had been weeks since you had been around your whole pack together by the time you were taken. The deep depression you sunk into before the events of the last week had been draining you slowly for weeks before this. It had started before John and Kyle were deployed, back to that day when you revealed the cameras and the secret you had been hiding from them. 

How long you’ve gone in such turmoil. 

How far you still have to go. 

The path up to the door is rocky and uneven, the wheelchair jostling as she pushes it up towards the door. She can picture your face, the way it has to be screwed up in pain. You're silent though, holding it all in. She almost wishes you weren't being silent about it. 

The door is already open, light shining from inside as she approaches. Kyle is in the house already, having gone ahead to greet his sister. John is right behind the two of you as Christine turns to wheel you up the steps into the house. His eyes are on you, focused and ready should you fall.  

Christine would never let you fall, and from the way your hand is gripping the arm of the chair for dear life, you probably couldn't anyway. 

She wheels you through the entryway, the inside warmer thanks to a fire that's burning. It's a nice cottage, far nicer than she had been expecting judging from the outside. 

Johnny lets out a low whistle as he enters behind John, looking around. “Yer parents own this?” 

“It was given to our mum by our grandparents. They did some...renovations before they passed it on.” Kyle says. 

“Yer tellin’ me.” Johnny says. 

It looks new inside. New wood floors, freshly painted walls. The furniture looks like she would expect to find in an English seaside cottage, though. Kyle’s parents went to France for summer vacation instead of utilizing the cottage, and none of his siblings had wanted to use it, he told them. It looks almost perfect, like it came right out of a home renovation show. Kyle’s sister must have worked some sort of magic to get it this clean. 

It is a very nice cottage. It’s small, the door opening right to the main area. There’s two couches and a chair in the middle of the room around a coffee table. To the left of the couches is a fireplace, the fire already lit and crackling. It looks original, likely having been untouched in the renovations. There’s a door to the left of the fireplace closer to the main entryway. A bedroom maybe? To the right of the front door are two doors, one on the far wall and one facing the front door. 

The stairs are in the middle of the house, leading up to the second floor where there’s likely more bedrooms. On the far side of the main area is the dining area and beyond that is a sliding glass door. Around the corner on the far side of the stairs is likely the kitchen. She can see the fridge from where she’s standing. It’s new. Very new. Makes her wonder just how long ago it had been renovated. 

“Everyone, this is my sister Ashley.” Kyle says, introducing the other woman in the room. 

“Hello,” she says, giving everyone a wave and a dazzling smile. 

She’s dressed simply in jeans and a t-shirt, her medium box braids pulled up into a bun on top of her head. They look a lot alike, her and Kyle. Tall and slender and stunning. They have the same smile and the same soft brown eyes. She's wearing scent blockers, but Christine can imagine her having a soft scent like lavender or something fresh like mint. 

“There's two rooms down here, and two upstairs.” Kyle says. “The main bedroom is through there.” He points towards a door to their left. “I figure we'll give that to our omega. The bathroom in there has a walk-in shower.” 

“Perfect.” Christine says. That will make getting you in and out of the shower easier at least, and you won’t have to go far to use the bathroom.

“You should take the other room down here.” John says, looking at Christine. “So you can be close in case of an emergency.”

And so you don't have to be too close to them, so you won’t feel like they’re hovering.

He doesn't have to say that part out loud. 

“I put new sheets on all the beds.” Ashley says. “I also picked up everything Kyle sent on the list. Food, some clothes, some other necessities.”

You let out a quiet groan, Christine patting your head gently. You have to be exhausted and sore after the day. She should give you another dose of pain medicine like she said she would. You’re going to need it tonight. 

“Let's get you laying down for a bit.” She says, wheeling you towards the door. 

Kyle opens it for her, revealing a spacious room with a big window looking out towards the sea. You're going to spend a lot of time in front of that window, she thinks. The bed is in the middle of the room, and there’s two chairs facing the window. She’s almost tempted to sit you in one of the chairs, but laying down will be more comfortable for you right now. 

You're still too out of it now to care much as she wheels you to the double bed. With Kyle's help they get you horizontal, Christine draping the blanket at the end of the bed over you. It’s not very soft, but it will do for now. She’ll have to get the guys to pick up some soft blankets for you when they go to town. She has a whole list of things starting in her head she needs them to pick up.

She leans your crutch against the end of the bed just in case you might need it for an emergency. She hopes you’ll yell first, but you always have been stubborn. Being mostly bed-bound has only made that worse. 

“I’m going to go look through the things Ashley picked up.” She says, patting your leg gently. “Get some rest.” 

Christine leaves the door open a crack as she exits, wanting to give you a little privacy as you nap, or at least she hopes you’ll nap. It’s going to be a rough adjustment, and you’re going to need as much rest as you can get. 

“I’m assuming you’re Christine.” Ashley says, walking up to her. 

“I am.” She says, giving Ashley a smile. 

She can’t help but get lost in Ashley’s soft gaze for a moment. The Garrick siblings seem to share the same magnetic energy. There’s something almost ethereal about them. She could easily imagine them with glowing halos and angel wings. It’s almost like she’s being blessed with the opportunity to look upon her. She could spend an hour staring at Ashley’s face and not grow tired of looking at her.

“I picked up the items Kyle said you needed.” She says, motioning to the bags on the coffee table, pulling Christine out of her daze. “I couldn’t find the exact nutrient powder you asked for, so I got one that was as close as I could find.” 

Christine glances through the bags. She was thorough, getting at least two of everything. 

“I got warmer clothes for her too, since it can get chilly out here this time of year. Just some simple things for now until you guys get into town.” Ashley says. “I did some research too and I read that omegas like comforting things so I picked up some extra blankets and pillows” Ashley says, motioning to a couple bags sitting on the couch. “I also picked up this,” She pulls a stuffed dog from one of the bags, holding it up. “It was the softest one I could find. I thought it might help.” 

A small smile forms on Christine’s face, her heart fluttering in her chest from the sweet, thoughtful gesture. Ashley doesn’t even know you, nor did she know exactly what happened to you, and yet she went so far as to pick up some comfort items for you. You have nothing right now, only the borrowed clothes on your back. All of your belongings are still on base, all of the things that you had built to make your perfect nest. Would you want any of them still? Or have they been tainted by the events of the last few weeks? 

That Ashley thought to do this has warmth flooding Christine’s body. You can have some comfort now without having to wait for their trip to town. She almost feels the urge to cry. She wants to hug Ashley, thank her over and over for her kindness. Ashley has no idea how much her small act of kindness means, how much it's going to mean. 

A smile forms on Christine’s face as she stares at the stuffed dog. “It’s perfect.” 

You can hear it. 

In the distance, the quiet roar reaches your ears as you’re dragged from the sweet arms of sleep. It must be a dream, or perhaps the sedative is still clinging to your mind, making you imagine things. 

No. 

You’d know that sound anywhere. 

The effort to push yourself up to sit is a momentous one, every cell in your body protesting after a day of being moved and jostled. The last thing you want is to move right now, but you have to. 

The pain meds have done little to help.

The crutch at the end of your bed must be a thousand miles away as you sit there and stare at it. The ache in your body only increases as you become more and more aware of the pain, almost as if it can tell what it is your mind is planning. 

The door is cracked open, letting in a slit of light from outside. It’s dark in the room, the curtains pulled over the window. It’s a blessing compared to the bright yellow light outside the door. You welcome the darkness as your head begins to throb. You could call for assistance. You’d get more help than you needed. More help than you want. 

No. 

You need to do this. 

The effort it takes to get standing nearly sends you back onto the bed. The pain nearly blinds you as your feet touch the floor, your body leaning against the side of the mattress out of desperation. If you fall, you’ll never be alone again. You can’t afford that. You don’t want that. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again. 

The breaths out of your nose are short and sharp as you reach for the crutch, fingers trembling in the effort to fight the pain threatening to blind you. You’re trembling like a leaf in a storm as your fingers finally wrap around the cool metal. The rubber bottom drags across the floor as you tug it over to you, holding it against your chest for a moment. 

Breathe. That’s what you need to do. Breathe. 

In and out. 

Nice and slow. 

The pain is only a memory. The pain is nothing. The memories forming at the edges of your mind will take over and wipe out the pain and the misery. You just have to be sure. You just have to be certain.

You push yourself upright using the crutch, tucking it under your arm. You should go back to bed. You should rest. 

No. 

You need to know. 

You need to be certain.

The first step you take nearly makes you sick. 

It’s like watching a baby deer walk for the first time, knees wobbling, feet shaking. You lean heavily on the crutch, your determination the only thing keeping you from tumbling to the floor in a heap. That might almost hurt worse than forcing yourself to stand upright. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again.��

Inch by inch you move across the floor, silently grateful for the socks on your feet. They allow you to slide across the hardwood, but they also pose a threat. Slide too far and you’ll lose your feet. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again. 

The determination and your desire for certainty is what keeps you sliding inch by inch across the floor towards that strip of blinding light in front of you. It’s hovering before you, threatening you. How do you know there’s not one of them standing guard, waiting for you to try and leave? You can’t know. You don’t have a clue what’s waiting on the other side of that door. It could be nothing. It could be your entire pack. 

Breathe. 

In and out. 

You take a moment at the door, resting your aching feet. Your body is throbbing from the effort to keep yourself upright, the sedative still numbing your brain and your movements. It’s like treading through honey, everything twice as hard as it should be. You can walk. You’ve done it before. You did it in the medical center. 

You can do it here. 

You use the crutch to push the door open more, your free arm still tucked in a sling to keep you from moving it. Reaching for it with that arm would have put you on the floor, would have caused more pain than you needed, would have made you fall. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again. 

Breathe. 

The light burns. Explosions of yellows and whites erupt behind your eyelids as you screw them tight against the sudden onslaught. The sun is in the room, shining its rays directly into your sensitive eyes. Your stomach churns, your fingers tightening around the crutch so tight your knuckles begin to ache. The oppressive light makes you want to recede back into the darkness of the room behind you like a vampire shying away from the light of day. 

No. 

You won’t be defeated by the harsh artificial lighting. You need to know. 

You need to be certain.

The others are moving around. You can hear voices around the corner, voices upstairs with thudding footsteps. The air is thick with a mesh of scents, cleaning chemicals, and the burn of scent blocker. Your nose wrinkles at the sudden onslaught against your senses, your sedated brain making it all seem so much worse. 

You need to know. 

The hardwood floors continue and you use them to your advantage as you shuffle your way across the main area. The fire crackles as you pass, the popping of a log making you startle. Your feet slide again, your body pushing up against the crutch to hold yourself steady. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again. 

Your target is dead ahead, a mile away but so close you can almost taste it. Just past the dining table and straight on till morning. 

Despite your snail’s pace, no one seems to notice you shuffling your way across the house. It should make you upset, the fact that none of them notice you moving around, but instead it makes you glad. They’d try to stop you if they noticed you, turn you around and shuffle you back to bed. Or worse, they’d carry you. 

How easily you could slip away, though. 

Well...in theory. 

Perhaps that’s why they ‘re not paying you any mind. How far could you really go in your current state? 

Why would you want to stray from the only safe space you have? 

The world outside is more dangerous with the state you’re in. Not just because of your injuries and your status, but also because you know Shepherd is still out there, and for all you know Graves is as well. 

He could be waiting right outside the door. 

No. 

They’d know. 

They’d protect you. 

They failed. 

You push past the fear in favor of certainty as you push forward, passing the dining table in your slow crawl towards the sliding glass door. 

It poses an entirely new threat as you stand before it, staring out the darkened glass. You have to get it open. Getting it open takes strength and you’re down to one hand that’s trying to keep you upright. 

You have to know. 

You have to be certain. 

You lean your weight on the crutch, ignoring the way it digs into your armpit as you reach for the handle. You click the lock, wrapping your fingers around the plastic before pulling. Your body screams with pain as you tug, the door sliding in the track as slowly as you had moved across the small living area. It’s almost as if it's mocking you. 

It’s open only as wide as you need to crutch your way through, doing your best not to knock your left shoulder against the frame. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again. 

Breathe. 

You can smell it. 

The salty sea air invades your senses, slipping up through your nose and straight into your brain. Memories come flooding back of childhood vacations back when things were simpler. Back when nothing mattered but the sand and the water and avoiding getting chased by your brothers carrying the piece of seaweed they found. 

Polkadot bathing suits, bright red to be seen easily. Toes in the water, sand everywhere. The nap in the silent car home. 

How simple life was back then. How easy life was. 

Your heart aches for those days again. The days when you could exist without a care in the world, trusting your pack would keep you safe, trusting your family would care for you. Your mind yearns for that sense of safety and security again. 

The world is grey as you hobble across the porch, the grey seeming to go on forever. You missed it, the chill in the air, the gloomy grey overhead. How you yearned for the gloom of England while stuck in the heat of Texas. 

Anything is better than Texas. 

Your forward shuffle pauses at the edge of the deck, your eyes looking out into the grey. Your breath catches in your throat as you stare out into the distance, the ache in your chest intensifying. It blocks out the pain in your body, numbing you to everything else as you stand there, legs trembling from the effort of going the short distance from your room to the end of the porch. 

You can see it. 

Emotions swirl inside of you like a hurricane as you stare out where the grey water meets the grey sky in the line of the horizon. Those emotions threaten to choke you as you stand there trembling at the edge of the porch. There’s a breeze, a cold one that bites through the fabric of your sweatshirt and into the skin below, but you don’t care. 

You can’t care. 

Your legs shake from the exertion, the neverending exhaustion that’s settled deep into your bones. It’s not just a physical exhaustion, but a mental one as well. It’s been a long week. 

Only a week. 

So much has happened in a week. 

You want to sit. You want to sink down onto the porch and rest. 

If you fall, you’ll never get up again. 

There’s a pain in your chest as your breath catches in your throat. The emotions are whirling, tightening around your chest, squeezing your lungs until they feel like they might pop. 

Breathe. 

In and out. 

You needed certainty. You needed to know. 

You can hear it. You can smell it. You can see it. 

A single tear rolls down your cheek as you stare out at the sea. 

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[lunajay33]

Waiting🖤

Summary: After decades of being alone without a love of his own he finally finds her in a gloomy town of forks, his brother Edward isn’t the only lucky one

Pairing: Emmett Cullen x f! Swan reader

Warning: angsty, fluffy sunshine Emmett

•Masterlist•

I never thought much about the future until suddenly the friends I adored most started relationships and left me in the past as if our friendship never even mattered, like their boyfriend was the most important thing

My sister and I use to be close as kids but when she moved away with our mom and rarely visited me and dad, who she regularly called Charlie, we grew apart leaving me feeling like I lost all my friends and my sister, after a while I grew depressed and I never wanted to leave the house, dad grew concerned and after many absent calls from school he allowed me to start home schooling myself and my grades have never been better

Most nights it was just me and Charlie some days I’d get the courage to go down to the reserve hang out on the beach with Leah, Seth and Jake, sometimes I’d go for hikes in the forest behind the house just to clear my head, but other than that I’d stay in my room listening to music, reading the books dad would bring home for me, and doing school work

That’s how life was for so many years, it was routine and it never bothered me and dad loved having me around, after Bella and mom left he was so broken and with my help, even as a little girl, I pulled him out of that deep dark hole and he became that Charlie that joked around and made me smile

But then dad got the call that Bella was moving back for the rest of highschool since mom would be traveling with Phil for baseball, hopeful that I could reconnect with my sister again

Dad and I picked out a new bed spread for her hoping she’d love it, and he even let me pick out a new book as a thank you for helping him out with getting everything ready for her arrival, after a few days it was time for dad to go pick Bella up from the airport in port angeles, I was a nervous wreck which was crazy I mean she’s my sister why should I be nervous

Finally the familiar sheriff cruiser pulled up in the drive way, I walked out the door with an umbrella quickly shuffling over to Bella to cover her from the rain knowing how she favoured the warm dry weather, complete opposite of me

“Welcome home Bella!” I smiled as we walked back inside as dad got her bags following closely behind

She shook off her coat and placed her little cactus down on the counter

“You’ve grown so much you’re a year younger but you’re already taller than me” she said as she hugged me

“Come on bells we’ll show you your room!” Dad said as he walked up the stairs with her bags

She settled in for the rest of the day until it was supper time, I set out the table and dished up our meal, dads game playing in the background as we ate

“So are you excited for school on Monday?” I asked

“Not really but atleast I’ll have you there”

“What? No im homeschooled remember”

“Well…..” dad drawled out

“Dad what did you do?” My heart was racing now at the implication

“I thought since Bella’s back now it would be good for you to get out there again, you need some experiences honey”

“But you know I have no one there, no one wants to be friends with me we’ve been over this”

“You might make new friends honey, give give it a chance for your old man” I sighed slumping back in my chair trying to wrap my head around having to socialize again

“Atleast you’ll be with me, dad said since your grades are so good you got bumped up a grade and can have some certain classes together, depending on our courses” that settled my anxiety a little

Bella and dad cleaned up from dinner as I sat out on the porch, in desperate need for fresh air to do its magic, only 2 more days and I’ll be back in a school again, who knows maybe some new kids have arrived and aren’t too set in their groups yet

Monday came quickly and I was a ball of nerves, I glanced in the mirror as made sure my hair was just the way I wanted, wearing a casual outfit, simple flared black leggings, a dark rich blue longsleeve with my old worn out dark brown carhartt jacket, quickly spraying my vanilla perfume

I walked down stairs to meet Bella in the kitchen, she grabbed an apple as she picked up her backpack from the table

“Are you ready to go?” She asked

“Almost can I make a tea quickly?” She nodded and I quickly wiped together a chai tea latte, grabbing my lunch from the fridge and meeting her in the truck dad had gotten for us but since I didn’t have my license, seeing as I never needed one before now, she would be driving us

The drive to school was calming, hearing the steady rain fall against the windshield, pulling into the parking lot everyone stared until we got out, I kept my eyes down as Bella led me to the schools main office

“Okay here’s your schedule, we have math together at the end of the day, the bells about to ring so I gotta head to world history are you good to find your way to chemistry?”

“Oh ummm yeah I’ll be fine”

“Okay see you at lunch” she smiled gently before she left down the hall

Looking at my schedule I memorized the room number hoping it wouldn’t be too hard to find, turning the corner I rammed into what felt like a brick wall, dropping my books I look infront of me to see the most beautiful guy I’ve ever seen, his eyes a golden amber, hair as dark as night and his skin as pale as snow

“Sorry about that, I haven’t seen you around before” he said soothingly as he handed me the books that had momentarily scattered the floor, not even realizing he had picked them up, too busy oogling him I suppose

“Oh yeah I’m just re-enrolling here again, just trying to find my class” he looked down at my schedule a striking smile adorning his face

“Come this way gorgeous, got the same class” walking along the mostly bare hallways I noticed his gentle glide, I’ve never seen such a…..well such a perfect human, obviously I was way out of my league if I could think he’d ever be interested in me, I mean I’m plain and simple what would he ever see in me, best I stay in my lane, but dad did want me to make friends so that couldn’t hurt….right?

We got to the classroom and the teacher assigned us to sit together, the class went by pretty boring, every now and then I’d take glances at Emmett and I swear he did the same but he was probably just looking at someone else, moments like this made me wish I was a beautiful as my sister, she never had a problem with guys wanting her, they basically drooled over her, even if she never acted on any offers she was still wanted

It felt like I was a living ghost most days, no one noticed me anywhere I’d go, a big reason I wanted to be homeschooled, now I’m thrown back into this miserable place, I’ll bet by lunch time Bella with have a table full of new friends while I sit alone, not even a second glance from anyone

Lunch time rolled around and as I entered the cafeteria I searched for Bella and just as I guessed she was surrounded with bright smiles, excited to get to know her, she glanced my way and I waved hoping she’d wave me over to sit but she just gave a half assed smile and got back to talking with her new friends, I felt my heart rip at that, thinking things would be different this time with her here but I guess I was wrong

I found an empty table near the windows and made myself comfortable for another lonely lunch, I pulled out my bag from my backpack but my appetite was lost and I had no desire to eat so I just pushed my lunch to the side and looked out the window just wanting to go home

{Emmett’s POV}

I couldn’t get her out of my head, she’s the most beautiful girl I’ve ever seen and her blood sings to me, when she bumped into me in the hallway I felt my whole world shift, she didn’t talk much but just being near her felt right

Lunch came, my least favourite part of the day, having to pretend for an hour, I glanced around the cafeteria hoping to catch a glimpse of my mate again, my eyes landed on her sat alone looking glum a few tables down, the others followed my gaze and smiled knowingly

“Who’s she?” Rosalie asked

“I think she’s my mate”

“Her thoughts are overwhelming loud” Edward stated

“What do you mean?” I asked nervously

“She’s not the happiest girl, I can hear how depressed she is, how unwanted she feels”

“I can feel how broken her heart is” Jasper added

This has to be the worst feeling knowing the one I’m suppose to love unconditionally and she is quite perfect in my eyes, has been broken and feels unloved

I got up from the table and made my way to her sliding in the seat across from her, her eyes were so glazed over with sadness she didn’t even realize I sat down

{Normal pov}

“So how’s your first day?” I jumped snapping out of my thoughts noticing Emmett is sat across from me

“Oh sorry I didn’t see you, ummm today has been fine I guess, thanks again for helping me earlier”

“It’s not problem, umm I was wondering maybe if you’re not too busy this weekend if you’d wanna hang out?” My heart raced at this

“Really? You wanna hang out with me?”

“Yeah of course, who would wanna spend time with the most beautiful girl in the school” his smile warmed my heart but quickly faded at a realization

“Is this a prank, because if it is it’s cruel” I said as my bottom lip wobbled

“No what? I would never do something like that I really wanna get to know you, so how about after school on Friday I’ll meet you in the parking lot and we can go do something?”

“Okay……sure id really like that” his face beamed with excitement

“Perfect it’s a date then gorgeous”

This felt surreal there’s no way there wasn’t a catch here, how could someone wanna spend their free time with me, but like Charlie said it doesn’t hurt to try, I just hope this doesn’t break my heart more

Part 2

[tatorthots]

— promise you’ll forget me

featured: liyue men x fem!reader

cw: generally gn but uses she/her (an itty bit), pet names, angst, hurt/comfort, a sliver of fluff, mention of character death, a little wholesome if you’re delusional enough (me)

synopsis: “When I die, promise me you’ll forget me. Erase me from your memories, bury me in the past, and live.”

a/n: my 3 babygirls + if I caused anyone any distress from this soft angst then let me know !! so I can continue wrecking havoc :)

── ꨄ︎ Xiao

Xiao stared at you, frozen in place and eyes widening as those words fell from your lips. He was in shock, completely baffled at how casually you uttered those words. As if they meant nothing… he grimly thought, As if you could ever mean nothing. His hands trembled, balling them into fists and digging his nails into the back of his palm. Had his silent affection, loving kisses, acts of devotion, and fierce protection not been testament enough to the impact you had on him? Had you not realized that you wielded the same amount of power over him as his previous master had with his true name? The Yaksha was almost amazed at your ignorance. “How dare you speak so carelessly…” he growled. Xiao was already fully aware of the reality of your inevitable death; it’s a truth that even the Conquerer of Demons, himself, adamantly refuses to revisit. He was bitterly aware that your time in Teyvat — your days together — was on borrowed time compared to his. That’s just the fate of a human's life in comparison to an Adeptus. He knew that the day will come when he would be forced to confront the tragic cycle of life and death once again, and if only for the sake of his Archon, he’ll grit his teeth and face it when the time comes. But to ask him to forget you, to erase you from his memories? You, who he cherishes most of all. You, who stealthily slithered into his heart and made a home in the remnants of his damned soul. You, who he foolishly fell in love with. There was no force in this wretched world that could ever submit him to abandon the little joy he was given in his life. And to ask that of him was to condemn him to a far crueler fate than that of the karmic debt he harbors on his shoulders.

Glowering at the wooden floorboards of the Wangshu Inn, Xiaos piercing eyes flickered up at you. “Do not make such absurd requests of me again.” He sneered. Flinching in surprise, you questioningly glanced at your lover. Shifting your gaze down, you noticed the deathly grip he held on the patio's railing and the cracking lines spreading beneath his fingertips. “Xiao… wait, I didn’t mean to—“ but your words were cut short by the solemn glint in his yellow stare. “There are many things I struggle to comprehend about you mortals, so tell me,” attentively, your ears perked up and your breathing paused as he spoke, “could you forget me so easily if I asked you to? Is your affection for me simply…” biting the inside of his cheek, his expression shifted to one of sorrowful hesitation, “temporary?” Your entire body tensed. Xiao had made a bad habit of hiding his less ‘acceptable’ emotions in an attempt to not burden you — no matter how many times you reassured him — so to glimpse at that fragile vulnerability and find the newly seed of doubt you had planted, it made your heart wrench in your chest. You blinked a few times as each flutter of your lashes only gathered more and more wet droplets onto them. “No! Xiao! I would ne-.. ver….” and that’s when you realized the weight of what you had asked him. Rejected.. I made him feel rejected, You internally groaned. Sighing you carefully took a few steps towards him, “Listen to me,” you softly spoke, “I don’t want you to live in mourning after I pass. You don’t deserve that, Xiao,” and his eyes widened, “I want you to be happy,” softening your gaze, you continued, “I want you to continue enjoying the gifts life brings, no matter how big or small they might be!” Standing in front of him, you reached a hand out to gently caress his cheek and dotingly smiled when he instinctively leaned into your touch. “I want you to keep spending time with humans, and one day you may even find new companions who’ll add to your happiness.” Nonsense, he thought. The Adeptus revers you almost as highly as his Archon and you think some feeble companions could ever compare? Xiao placed his hand atop yours and gingerly kissed your palm. His eyes reflected a tender intensity as he peered down at you, “Our connection is too strong, y/n.” his arms wrapped protectively around you, holding you tightly as if he wasn’t careful enough you’d disappear and be gone forever. Xiao hovered his lips above yours as he rested his forehead on you, and closed his eyes, “No matter what challenges time brings, or what you, yourself, try to do to sever our bond,” pressing his lips on yours, he kissed you as he quietly whispered, “I will love you, always.”

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

417 years have gone by since Xiao last held you in his embrace. And although he was pleased he was able to offer you a long, happy and loving life, Xiao would be blatantly lying if he said he’d moved on from your death. And if not for your last — somewhat reasonable — request, he likely wouldn’t have intervened with the lives of mortals, or reluctantly accepted their friendship. If that was what you truly would’ve wanted for him then he’ll hold his complaints and trust your judgement. It was bittersweet, really. If you were still alive, he knew in his heart you’d be fascinated by these mortals' new technology and inventions; he wonders what you’d say of this new era. And he can’t help the smile that tugs on his lips as he thinks of how you’d fawn over these silly contraptions, There’s no doubt you’d be foolishly fascinated by such simple trinkets, he thinks, but archons what he wouldn’t do to see your eyes sparkle with wonder again. And although Teyvat has undergone infinite changes, there is but one acre of land that the Yaksha has ensured remains untouched by humans, Adeptus or demons alike. It was a sort of sanctuary for him. A place of refuge, meditation, reflection, and heartache; but above all, it was where Xiao would religiously visit to honor the love he had, and continues to have, for you — his one and only. The area was radiant, nothing less than one of Liyues hidden gems. The ground was vibrant with lush grass, lively wildlife, and blanketed with all your favorite flowers; flowers Xiao had helped you plant and nurture. What once started as your personal garden ended up flourishing with vines, plants and new ecosystems. It could honestly be described as a mini forest, and the Adeptus wonders if it’s prosperity is because of you. Either way, you would’ve loved it, and that thought alone was enough. Thinking back, Xiao couldn’t believe he was so ignorant. Initially, he thought the whole custom was silly when Morax first casually mentioned it one day. ‘Marriage, is a unity humans practice as well here in Teyvat. It is a unity between lovers — a ceremonial alliance, if you will.’ To him, the idea seemed pointless, but the thought never left his head since. He’s already submitted himself to you in every way, but if his Archon had advised marriage was also a custom between mortals then perhaps you would like to marry as well. So this sacred area is where you both wed. The beaming smile and buzzing excitement you showed that day was forever engraved in his memories. Xiao still keeps the silver ring you slid on his finger with him. Though as of recent centuries he hasn’t worn it as much in order to preserve its integrity, but sometimes, when he’s laying amidst the swaying grass and reminiscing of times gone past, he’ll slip it on and think of you. On rare occasions the Yaksha would even stage a performance, the way he used to when he danced beneath the moonlight as you watched in awe. Whether sunlight warms his skin, rain splashes on his hair and wets his clothes, or strong currents of the wind whistles loudly through the air, he’ll dance to the natural rhythm of Teyvat. A performance reserved only for you. Other times he’ll rest on a bed of soft moss as his honey eyes gaze at the starry sky till morning illuminates the world once more. Simply remembering the sound of your voice, your touch, your laugh, and he’ll wonder, wherever you are in this vast universe, if you think of him too.

── ꨄ︎ Zhongli

The sound of glass shattering echoed throughout the mountaintop of Mt. Aocang. The traditional, delicately crafted teacup Zhongli held was now shattered into pieces in the palm of his hand, and the tea previously filling it was now spilled all over the god's lap. Unaware that his sudden vise-like grip was to blame for its broken state. He saw your lips move and your body apprehensively patting his clothes dry with a cloth, but he couldn’t hear a thing. Zhongli simply stayed in place as his golden eyes stared at you. Yes, it’s true that the former Geo Archon has encountered countless tragic fates and lost several friends and close relationships to the erosion of time. And it’s only been recent, with the reawakening of Azhdaha, that he had to reluctantly reevaluate and reaccept his cursed fate of eternity until the last remnants of his body eroded back into the stones of old. Azhdaha reminded him his future was pitiful. Doomed to solidarity as punishment for being a God. It was for that exact reason that Zhongli heavily contemplated the idea of entering a relationship with a human for a very long time before officially committing to you. However, it was also through that slow-burn romance that an unexpected love blossomed. Its tender passion awoke a primal instinct that had long laid dormant in the depths of Morax’s innate desires — it caught the Archon, himself, off guard. The love of a God cannot be easily earned or discarded. It entails complete submission, adoration, and devotion. Then again, it might be the reason Zhongli wasn’t avoidant of the inevitable outcome of this relationship. He fully accepted the consequences of his decision if it meant enjoying just a moment of tranquility in your embrace. He’d be willing to endure a thousand years of heartache if it meant hearing your voice just once, and he’d suffer through thousands more if even to kiss the fabric that clung to your body.

Zhongli, blinked from his trance and looked down to see you patting his clothes dry with red fingertips and scathed palms from the burning hot tea. Swiftly, he took hold of your hands and took the cloth away from you. He felt a pang of guilt as he carefully cascaded his thumb across the searing flush of your warmed skin. “I do apologize, my love.” shifting his gaze up to you, he continued, “It seems that your request has taken me aback.” Tightening your hold on his hands, you knitted your brows in worry, “Oh.. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to offend you.” you pouted. Zhongli removed his gloves, and your attention trailed to the geo marks decorating his golden skin. So pretty, you thought. “There is no need to fret, darling.” His voice was deep and affectionate. An obvious difference compared to the usual somber and nonchalant tone he speaks with, and it made your heart flutter knowing it was only ever exposed to you. But then suddenly, his expression turned serious. “However, that request would be a breach of contract, and I simply, will not break it.” Your eyes widened for a moment before quirking an eyebrow up in question. You momentarily tilted your head in curiosity, and the Archon couldn’t help but feel his gaze soften, just a little, in response to your small habit. Fluttering your eyes on him, you asked, “What contract?” What contract? He silently mused, as if the answer itself was blatantly obvious — which to him, it was. Lowly chucking, he wrapped his large hand around your wrist and slipped his fingertips up to caress your palm. Raising your hand up to his lips, he languidly met your gaze with his adoring one. “If you do not recall, then allow me to remind you.” Closing his eyes, he placed a kiss on your fingertip, “I have sworn myself each time I touch your skin.” He placed a kiss on another, “Each time my mind had been desperately surrendered by thoughts of you.” Then another, fluttering his long lashes, he peered at you with half-lidded eyes as his pupils dilated to slits “In every moment our bodies intimately intertwine together amidst the heat of our love.” Gasping at his sudden confession, your heart sped up in a fervent fluster. He leaned in close, “I am bound to you, my love, for all eternity.” Zhongli kissed you once, and then twice. He placed his hands on your hips and pulled you in, almost urging you to sit on his lap. Deepening the kiss the Geo Archon could only pray his kisses could hope to portray even a sliver of the love he has for you.

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

And so a millennium has passed, he hums. 1,231 years to be exact. Since your passing, Zhongli counted each year that came and went. Placing an incense down on the shrine he built in your memory, the Archon kneeled before your golden statue and prayed — he’s not quite sure to who, and he’s not sure if there’s anyone listening, but if there is, he hopes it’s you. Today had been an unusual day given that he doesn’t normally visit your shrine so late in the evening, but no matter what he did it seemed like unforeseen circumstances kept getting in the way of his preplanned visit. And after several attempts of trying to untangle himself from piling responsibilities, he sighed and decided it was best to just visit you by the end of today no matter what or who dared get in his way. Which brings us to now. However, shortly after he started his peaceful meditation, he was disturbed by someone’s quiet shuffles behind him. Fluttering his eyes open, his sharp gaze glared in the direction the noise was coming from. Even though it’s location wasn’t necessarily private, this shrine was his personal alter of worship, a private haven, who the hell was foolish enough to intrude on its sacred premises? Snapping his head around, his menacing gaze immediately widened into one of pure shock. It surely.. can’t be..? He muttered in disbelief. “Oh! I’m sorry I-um- I didn’t realize someone was here!” The voice awkwardly spoke, and as they turned to leave, his lips moved before he could realize he was talking, “What’s your name?” Blinking in surprise, the woman sheepishly rubbed the back of her neck, “Ah. I’m h/n, heh.” Walking closer she carefully inspected the handsome man as he stared at her like she was some sort of ghost. “Is this your shrine?” Looking up at the statue she softly smiled, “I’ve been coming here for weeks.” she confessed, and Zhongli slowly stood from his position. It’s her. The depths of the dragons innate need for his mate had violently awoken from its slumber, and he felt the bond he mourned for centuries, suddenly call out to each and every one of his senses. It’s her. Your reincarnation. Lighting her own stick of incense and bowing, the woman — you — glanced back at him, “I found this place by accident, and I bring my own incense to pay my respects as well. But honestly, I don’t know why I come here.” You chuckled. “Maybe it’s because her statue looks similar to me, or maybe … it’s because I can’t help but feel like this place calls to me.” Shaking your head, you bashfully looked away, “Sounds crazy, right?” “No.. no, not at all….” Softening his gaze, he offered a smile. There’s no mistaking it. I can sense her soul, years of longing and heartache clutched his heart, I could recognize it anywhere. And so the both of you spent the evening chatting away over tea the man you came to know as ‘Zhongli’ had prepared, and when nighttime shadowed the streets you both politely took your leaves. Zhongli deeply considered whether or not he should look for you again, but he soon realized he couldn’t bring himself to disrupt the new life you had built — even if it didn’t include him. He told himself he was happy, satisfied knowing your soul had returned even if every cell in his body painfully yearned to be with his lover again. Being given the opportunity to drink tea with you should be privilege enough. It wasn’t until you visited the shrine early one morning that you finally found him. After a brief catch-up, he noticed you nervously shifting, “Is something the matter?” He worriedly asked. With a deep breathe you confessed what’d been on your mind since your last encounter. “Have we met before?” You began, and his entire body froze, “I know this might seem strange but…” and unconsciously his body leaned in closer as his primal instincts begged him to caress your skin once more, but he forced himself rooted. Until you uttered a single sentence and momentarily tilted your head in curiosity that he felt his heart struck, and daresay, even gave the god hope. “I can’t help but feel like…. I’ve met you before, a long time ago.”

── ꨄ︎ Childe

Strumming his fingertips, Childe hummed in contemplation. He’s well aware of the repercussions that come with being 11th of the Fatui Harbingers, and he’s hyper-aware of the vile leverage his enemies would try to obtain when discovering the infamous Harbinger has taken a lover. However, the thing about Childe is that he actually openly welcomes his enemies to try to even get remotely near you. Honestly, your request is just straight-up hilarious to him. But he supposes he can’t blame you. After all, you haven’t a clue of the extent your lover has and, even as you ask, is taking to ensure your safety. It’s stressful, really, but the man loves challenges — “Let them come, let them ALL come!” He manically laughs, before lowering his head, “I’ll kill them all where they stand.” he snarls. Every loud and flamboyant confession, every playful kiss, every subtle caress of your skin, and each lingering touch holds an ulterior motive aside from just affection. It’s a warning. But you never noticed, have you? While you’re pushing him away in a flustered daze, you don’t notice how his cheeky smile and crescent eyes fall the second you turn in a huff and his gaze narrows to a sinister glare — directly locking eyes with the spies creeping atop rooftops. How he never directly answers your questions when he disappears for a few minutes only to return scathed and sometimes even bleeding. Brushing away your worry with a tender smile as he pinches your cheek, “Heh, don’t worry so much!” He’ll coo. Your request isn’t even an option. Childe would die for you, kill for you, live for you. He’ll do whatever it takes to stand above a pile of bloody corpses if only to force them to bow before you. You, the promised ruler of the world he’ll craft. And should you fall, he would build his empire on the blood of millions just to keep his promise.

Childes eyes glimmered in amusement as he threw his head back and laughed. “Hahah—!! You really do have an active imagination babe!” Playfully ruffling your hair, he chuckled, “C’mon now, don’t say such nonsense.” His lips curled into a beaming smile, but you could tell by the edge laced in his words that he meant what he said. Huffing, you smacked his hand away, “I’m not joking, Ajax!” Sighing, you turned away in embarrassment, “I’m being…. I’m being serious, alright?” Pausing, Childe furrowed his brows, “You’re serious?” Rolling your eyes, you marched away feeling flustered and annoyed by your lover's reaction, “Yes! I’m being serious!” Normally, the incredulous stare Childe gave you would’ve made you tease him in any other situation, but as of now it only added to the searing burn on your cheeks. Following behind you, he grabbed your arm to stop you and delicately tugged you to look at him. “Hey, what are you saying?” Turning around, you were met with narrowed blue eyes and a frown, “Are you calling me weak?” And as much as you wanted to stay mad at him, you couldn’t help but crack a smile at his accusatory tone and pouty lips. Intertwining your fingers with his you stepped toward him until your face was only inches away from his pretty glaring eyes. Running your fingertips against his jaw, you lightly traced them across his freckled skin until you reached his messy, orange hair, “The only thing I think you are is dumb.” You lovingly purred. Scoffing he averted his gaze from yours. “Listen, Ajax,” you started, “I know you worry about me, and yes, even though you’re the strongest man I know—“ “Ever will know.” He corrected. Giggling you flicked his forehead, “Ever will know~” you repeated, before you cleared your throat and steeled your gaze, “If I do pass… promise me you’ll live for yourself, okay? Take care of yourself, and no matter what, don’t let my memory hold you back.” Hold me back? He chuckled. Gently placing both hands on your cheeks, he guided your head to fully face him, “Your life makes me feel alive, y/n, and if the day comes — which it won’t,” he sternly emphasized, “your memory will only serve as the reason I fight to survive.” Pulling you into his protective embrace he buried his face in your soft locks, “I’ll keep you safe.”

⋆｡ﾟ☁︎｡⋆｡ ﾟ☾ ﾟ｡⋆

720 days. That’s 720 archon-forsaken days, and sleepless nights. It was clear to all, that a part of Childe never quite recovered the day he found your lifeless body lying alongside the jagged edges of stone slabs resting beneath a mountain cliff side. The image of your body lying still as a pool of your blood gushed from your mutilated wounds onto the unforgiving surface of the rocks became a memory deeply embedded in the Harbingers mind. Then again, perhaps it wasn’t something inside him that had shattered, but instead completely disappeared. Even now, he still feels likes he’s quietly being haunted by the agonizing screams he cried and tears that he endlessly shed as he held your bloody corpse in his possessive and shaky embrace. However, all of that paled in comparison to the unsettling numbness that nestled within his bones and tainted his heart when he caught sight of the item that dropped from your hand as he cradled you. It was mocking. Taunting, even. “The pendant…” he spoke, barely above a whisper. She protected.. the pendant I gave her? His azure stare darkened as the very last of his compassion died right there and then. Now they only harbored hatred and desolation. Reaching to pick up the pendant, Childe carefully brushed the blood staining it with his gloved thumb. This was the gold entwined, jade pendant he had gifted you during the firework showcase of your first Lantern Rite with him. It was intended as a good luck token — a marker of sorts. He promised you that so long as you held this pendant, he would always come to protect you; your lover vowed this. His breath trembled, and his jaw clenched as he glared at it with blurry eyes. He couldn’t help but wonder, Was she waiting for me, choking out a sob his fingers combed through your hair as he rested his forehead on yours and salty tears dripped down your cheek, to protect her? And that thought alone was enough to sever the remaining domestic threads of his heart. For the next two years, Childe spent every waking moment tracking your killer. His obsession only further manifested as time went by. Even his work as a Fatui Harbinger strained, yet none were brave enough to tell him otherwise. Either because of fear, or because the Tsaritsa ordered it so. During that time there were those who argued that Childe had gone on a blind rampage, and others argued the Harbinger became the vengeful embodiment of a man of focus, commitment, and sheer will. To be honest? Neither were completely right or wrong. He never hurt bystanders, yet he never hesitated slaughtering anyone who got in his way. As for those foolish enough to mislead him or hold information? Well, they suffered a fate worse than death. It wasn’t until he found himself deep within the shadowy crevices of the chasm that he finally met your murderer. It was a wretched demon that had ripped you away from him, a crime even death was too good for. The accumulated rage of a fallen God was nothing compared to the murderous hatred he harbored. In the end, Childe came victorious — albeit at the cost of his own life. Sliding against weathered stone, he sat down and aimlessly stared at the curvatures of the chasm. “Seems I couldn’t keep my promise, huh?” He chuckled, “Don’t be too mad at me.” Wincing in pain, he slipped out the pendent he gifted you from his Foul Legacy’s armor as he felt his eyelids grow heavy. Kissing it’s cold exterior, he took a breathy sigh, “Please, wait for me,” fluttering his eyes shut, a line of blood dribbled from his lips as he smiled, “just a little…. longer..”

side note!: new format ! let’s goooooooooo

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[roosterforme]

Always Ever Only You Part 34 | Rooster x Reader

Summary: Without you at home, Bradley's big mouth is about to get him in trouble. As he counts down the hours until he can pick you up from the airport, you wrap up your trip to Maryland with a visit to your childhood home. However, you're not as smooth as you think you are. By the time you get back to San Diego, you are an absolute train wreck, and some secrets have been revealed.

Warnings: Swearing, pregnancy topics, angst, fluff

Length: 4500 words

Pairing: Bradley "Rooster" Bradshaw x Female Reader

This was written to accompany my series Is It Working For You? along with a bunch of my one-shots and other series, but it can be read on its own! Check my masterlist for the reading order. Always Ever Only You masterlist. Gorgeous banner by @mak-32

On Thursday morning, Bradley got to work a little bit early. He just needed to make a tiny detour to one of the database computers. He really wasn't sure if you realized that you told him Commander Patterson's first name last night, or if you let it slip by accident, but now that he knew it, he just wanted to check him out.

Every trip you took to Annapolis turned into some sort of disaster at one point or another. He couldn't imagine you were out there looking for trouble, but it sure did find you in the form of Derek or Josh. You were the most capable person Bradley knew, but he loved and respected you enough to know that sometimes you needed a break. Right now, he just wanted to bring you back home and take care of every tiny need or want that you or the baby might have. He'd honestly fucking delight in that.

As soon as he logged into the system, Bradley typed in your full name, complete with Bradshaw hyphenated at the end. A second later, your image appeared on the screen complete with lovely smile and gorgeous eyes. "That's my Baby Girl," he muttered, still captivated by this photo of you. 

He forced his fingers back to the keyboard, but no results appeared when he looked for Derrick Patterson. He tried Paterson. Then he tried Derick. Then he tried Derek Patterson and saw the face of the asshole who made his wife cry over a steak dinner. Were you more emotional right now than perhaps you would usually be? Absolutely. But that was only because you were pregnant. As soon as you told him you had a positive pregnancy test, Bradley's number one concern in this world simply switched from his wife to his wife and his child. 

This guy looked like a real tool. Forty-four years old. Ranked up to Commander two years ago. Worked in a simulation lab. Had the same degrees from the Naval Academy that you earned. "Yeah, well I can guarantee you're not as smart as her, you motherfucker."

He took another minute to memorize what he saw there before logging out. Maybe he'd ask Maverick about him. Cyclone and Warlock would be good resources, too. Bradley just hated that he wasn't able to make you feel safe and comfortable at the moment, but as soon as he picked you up tomorrow, he'd take care of everything. 

When he started to head out to the tarmac, he literally ran into someone while he was adding steaks to the grocery list he saved in his phone. He didn't know how to cook a steak, but he'd get them just in case you were still in the mood for one. "Sorry," he muttered, not really looking up, too concerned with what else you might want.

"It's okay, Bradley."

Then he did look up into the dark eyes of Maria Wilson. "Hey," he said with a smile at your good friend. "I've been meaning to ask you... how's rooming with Bob going for you?"

"Great," she replied with a little shrug and a completely neutral expression. "He's clean and courteous, and I think the arrangement is going to work out really well." 

If he didn't know better, Bradley would have believed nothing was going on. She was that good. But he did know better. He wasn't going to do Bob dirty, so he just nodded and said, "I hope it does work out. I've always felt a little bad about stealing my wife away from you."

She just laughed and said, "Like we didn't all see that coming a mile away."

He wandered off with a grin on his face after he said goodbye. He was planning on making a few stops on the way home before Jake showed up to workout together later. Bradley just had to get through one more night and then you'd be back.

----------------------------

You were an idiot for eating two steaks and seventeen pounds of sides and then passing out for the night. Sure, at the time, it seemed like the best idea you'd ever had. Derek's porterhouse hit the fucking spot like nothing else. The potatoes were creamy and delectable. The brussels sprouts? A thing of beauty.

But Thursday morning, you were back to your normal routine of throwing up as soon as you got out of bed. "I get it, okay?" you gasped as you sprawled out on the bathroom floor. "I understand," you added, letting your hand settle on your belly. "You miss your Dad. Well guess what. I miss him, too. Now will you stop acting out if I promise to take you home tomorrow?"

A soft gurgle as your stomach started to settle was the response you got, and that was actually better than you could have hoped for. When you heard tapping on your hotel room door, you knew it was Cat, and you wanted to cry. You were wearing Bradley's UVA shirt and a pair of your ratty underwear and nothing else, and she'd just keep knocking until you answered. 

"I'm coming," you moaned, actually crawling most of the way there. You pulled yourself up and then cracked the door open a few inches, and you were met with Cat's appraising eyes. "Hi."

"I just wanted to know if you wanted to get breakfast with me," she said cautiously.

"No, I'm good, but thanks for asking." You tried to close the door, but her foot was immediately preventing that. 

"Are you sick?" she asked. "I can bring something back for you."

"No, I'm okay," you told her. Your stomach lurched, and your eyes went wide. You had about ten seconds to get rid of her and make it to the toilet. You didn't know what to do as saliva pooled at the back of your tongue. You started to gag as your eyes filled with tears. 

"Hey," she said softly. "If something's wrong, you can tell me."

But you shook your head and let go of the door, making a mad dash back into the bathroom. You barely made it to your knees in front of the toilet before you barfed again. "Why?" you moaned, wiping your mouth with toilet paper before rolling onto the bath mat which had become your best friend.

"Oh my god," Cat muttered as she walked right into your hotel room bathroom. She flushed the toilet and then turned to the sink and started to fill one of the disposable cups with water. "You're pregnant," she stated plainly. "You could have told me, you know. Congratulations, by the way."

As she knelt on the floor next to you, she helped you sit up. You accepted the cup from her and said, "It's just food poisoning." She blinked at you a few times, giving you no wiggle room to lie to her. "Fine," you admitted with a little smile, "I'm pregnant."

She ran the backs of her fingers along your forehead while you sipped the water. "How far along are you?"

"About nine or ten weeks," you whispered as you closed your eyes for a few beats. "I'm just really tired and really fucking sick. I felt good last night, but now I feel terrible again."

Cat took the empty cup from your hand and wrapped you up in a soft hug. "Thank you for holding it together for the presentation. Now you need to get back into bed."

You shook your head and said, "I need to get up and moving so I can go see my parents later."

"No," she said firmly, guiding you back to the bed. "You need to rest right now. You'll feel better if you do." 

Part of you wanted to make sure your suitcase was closed so she didn't see your vibrators, but mostly you didn't even care. She had a certain way about her that was calming you down, and as soon as you were in the bed, she tucked you in. You almost believed her when she told you that resting would help you feel better. 

"Where's your room key?" she asked once you were curled up on your side.

You let one hand sneak out from under the covers and pointed. "Next to the TV."

She patted your shoulder and promised she would be back soon, and then she was gone. You dozed on and off while your stomach gurgled, and you missed a few texts from Bradley. When Cat eventually opened your door and let herself in, you were actually feeling hungry. And that's when you noticed two bags and a cup carrier in her hands. 

Quietly, she set everything down on your nightstand including some orange juice that almost brought a tear to your eye. Somehow she knew that was what you needed when you didn't even know yourself. You sat up as she poked a hole in the lid and handed it to you, and you drank half of it down in one sip.

"You need to eat something," she whispered, taking the cup away again. "I got you a bagel with cream cheese, an egg sandwich, a few different kinds of donuts and a muffin."

You reached for the bagel, and she unwrapped it for you. "I'll pay you back," you rasped, but she shook her head.

"Don't worry about it. Just make the baby happy, and we're square," she replied as she sank down into the chair beside the bed.

But you were definitely going to worry about it. Money was very tight for Cat and Jeremiah, so you would have to figure out a way to make it even. She probably spent about forty bucks on all of this for you, and somehow she knew that a sesame seed bagel with cream cheese would go down as happily as the steaks did. You devoured the whole thing and then took some bites out of the egg and cheese sandwich before finishing the orange juice. 

Then you drank some of the hot tea as well and nibbled on a muffin, and you felt so much better. Cat asked you a few questions, but she didn't pry. "Bradley must be over the moon," she said softly with a sad smile. 

"Oh yeah," you told her, knowing that her ex-husband did not have a relationship with Jeremiah. "He dubbed the baby the chicken nugget." When she laughed, you added, "He's very excited to be a dad."

"He'll be a good one," she confirmed with a nod. "Now why don't you rest for a few more hours, and then I can drop you off at your parents' house so you don't have to drive."

"You don't have to do that."

"I'll drop you off and then go to the outlet mall. There are some things I want to get for Jer, and then I can pick you up again." She probably knew it wasn't a good idea to let you drive like this, and you were honestly kind of thankful that she offered.

"Alright." You fell asleep again as soon as she was gone.

--------------------------

When Bradley left work, it was blazing hot out, and he had his aviators on while he walked to the parking garage. It was already late as hell in Maryland, and he was a little afraid you had already left your parents and gone back to the hotel for the night. But your phone only rang briefly before you answered his FaceTime call.

"Bradley," you sighed, looking better than he'd seen you in weeks. "Here, say hi to everyone."

You turned your phone to reveal both of your parents along with Cat, sitting around the dining room table in the house where he was finally getting used to spending his holidays. They all greeted him warmly before your mom took the phone and asked him at least a dozen questions.

"Are you eating enough without her at home? How's work? How's Tramp? When can we come visit again, because she's not giving us a clear answer?"

She said nothing about the baby, so Bradley assumed you were holding yourself together well enough that it hadn't been mentioned. "I've been subsiding on cereal. Work is great. Tramp is great. I've been thinking about starting a project to expand the upstairs into another bedroom or two, so hopefully after that's finished, you and dad can stay as long as you want."

Bradley knew they would feel like a handful for him if they stayed at the house again, but that was only because he liked being alone with you. He really wanted to take a minute to talk to you privately, but your dad took the phone next so he could show off his latest painting project. When he finally got handed back to you, apparently it was time for you and Cat to head out. 

"I'll let you know when the flight leaves tomorrow," you told him. "Love you, Roo."

And that was it. With a deep sigh, he started up the red Bronco and headed to the store on his way home. He hated shopping in his uniform; he always got a bunch of looks from people, mostly women. He tried to make it quick, but it took him a little time to gather up steaks, potatoes, garlic, your favorite coffee, and all of the yellow flowers in the floral section. 

He barely had all of the food put away at home when Jake knocked twice on the front door before letting himself in the house. "It's like he fucking lives here," Bradley muttered to Tramp who had been waiting for his scoop of dinner before he ran to see Jeremiah.

"Hey, man," Jake called out. He had Cat's son tucked under one arm and some weird contraption under the other, and he was wearing gym clothes. "Did you just get home?"

"Yeah," Bradley replied, unable to keep himself from smiling when Jeremiah reached out for him. He took the little boy in his arms and told him, "I had to get some stuff for my wife. You remember her. She's your favorite babysitter. She read you some books while you fell asleep, because her voice is the sweetest thing in the world."

Jake rolled his eyes. "Angel made you soft, old man."

Bradley pointed to Jeremiah. "And this little thing made you soft, so you don't have a leg to stand on."

He just kind of shrugged in response and took the child back as he said, "Go get changed. I'll meet you in the garage."

As Jake disappeared through the sliding glass door, Bradley headed to the bedroom. He stripped out of his uniform and put on some shorts and a Top Gun shirt that was starting to fit a little snug across his biceps and chest again. This was a good sign, because he wanted to bulk up as much as possible. He'd be ready to haul the baby and all of the gear around so you didn't have to. 

His thoughts were on you and the baby. You. Baby. You. Baby. He couldn't wait until both of you were home tomorrow. When he walked out to the garage, he found Jake doing a few pushups while Jeremiah played with a stuffed tiger while he sat in some sort of portable crib.

"What is that thing?" Bradley asked as he reached for his lifting gloves. "A mini crib?"

Jake jumped to his feet as he said, "It's called a pack 'n play, but yeah, it's kind of a mini crib that folds up."

"Huh," he replied, eyeing it up so he could search online for that kind of thing later. "Looks handy. We're definitely going to need one of those."

Jake was frozen in place, eyes wide and jaw hanging open. "Is Angel pregnant? I knew her ass looked bigger." A grin curled along his lips, and that was when Bradley realized he had fucked up.

"Oh, shit," he muttered as his heart rate sped up and he started to sweat. You were going to be so upset. Your own parents didn't even know yet, but now Jake did, and it was all his fault.

"She's pregnant!" Jake practically shouted. "Congratulations, Rooster," he said, pulling Bradley into a hug and slapping him on the back. "You finally figured out which hole to put it in, huh?" he asked with an absolutely obnoxious grin.

Bradley glared at him. "Seriously. Nobody else knows about this yet. She might murder me if she finds out you know."

"I won't say shit about it," Jake promised, cuffing him on the shoulder before releasing him. "Damn, she must be excited. I know you both wanted this."

"Yeah," Bradley rasped, just knowing his face must be flushed pink. He ran his fingers through his hair. "I'm so fucking happy and scared and nervous, I can barely make it through a day without her here, you know?"

Jeremiah roared and held up the tiger for Bradley. He took it and made it roar back before pretending it was kissing Jeremiah all over his face. His laugh was infectious, and it left Bradley smiling. 

"Damn," Jake drawled. "I think you're ready for the parenting thing."

"I know I am," he replied, fixing him with a serious look. "I'm ready."

Jake sighed and nodded. "But you still have a lot to learn. Do you know about outlet covers?"

Bradley's eyes went wide. "No. What are those?"

"How about white noise to help a baby sleep? Do you know what a convertible car seat is?"

"No," Bradley whispered, "No, I don't."

Jake settled back onto the bench and reached for the barbell. "Spot for me, and I'll tell you everything I've learned."

------------------------

It was finally Friday morning, and Cat was knocking on your door with another round of food and orange juice before you were even out of bed. When you let her in, she set everything up on the nightstand while you went to use the bathroom, and you were pleasantly surprised that you didn't need to throw up while you were in there.

"Eat as much as you can," she told you. "I asked them to give you a late checkout, so you can stay here until noon, and then we'll head to the airport."

"You're a saint," you told her with a mouth full of bagel. "I owe you so much money for this, you have to let me pay you back."

She just shook her head. "I'll let you babysit Jer so Jake and I can go out one night. Assuming I'm still in a relationship after we get bad to San Diego later tonight."

"You will be," you told her as you sipped the orange juice. "Jake isn't stupid." You paused before you set the juice down in favor of a donut. "Well... he's kind of stupid, but not when it comes to this."

Cat reached into the bag for another donut. "Seriously, if he and Bernie can't figure their shit out, I'll pull the plug and never look at another man again."

"Sometimes they really aren't worth the aggravation," you remarked, thinking back to every guy you dated before Bradley. "But sometimes they surprise you."

She didn't say anything else as she finished her donut. Then she let you take a nap, and when you got up and got dressed, you felt pretty amazing. Your stomach was gurgling quietly, and you looked okay enough to skip the makeup today. 

You dragged your suitcase out into the hallway and texted Bradley, letting him know you were going to be heading to the airport soon, and he responded almost immediately. 

Bradley Rooster Bradshaw <3 <3 <3: i'll meet you in baggage claim sweetheart. i can't wait to have you and the nugget back home with me

You practically moaned, and also started tearing up as Cat met you in the hallway. "When willI I be normal again?" you whispered. "All I want to do is have rough, frequent sex with my husband, but every time I think about how sweet he is, I start crying."

She laughed and said, "You won't feel normal until about six months postpartum. Just have fun running that man ragged."

You nodded and wiped at your tears. "Where's our equipment bin?"

"Already in the car."

"You weren't supposed to move it alone! It's so heavy."

"And you shouldn't be carrying anything like that at all," she scolded, pushing you gently toward the elevators. "I took care of it. I'll take care of it all day, and I'll get your suitcase when we get to the airport, too."

You sobbed the whole way down in the elevator and most of the ride to the airport. When you said thank you, Cat told you to be quiet which made you smile and also cry more. You'd get Bradley to agree to watch Jeremiah for a whole weekend. It would give the two of you some practice, and it would give Cat and Jake time alone. There was no way he was going to mess anything up.

--------------------------

Bradley parked the red Bronco at the airport with a vase of flowers in the cup holder and an ultrasound picture tucked into the visor. Your flight had been delayed a few times, and he figured you were probably starving now. He picked up the container of peanut butter crackers he prepared and started to head inside, still a little too early but with nothing better to do.

He found an empty bench, and it wasn't long before Jake came strolling in with Jeremiah in his arms. Bradley stood up, jostling the snack container as he muttered, "You're not going to say anything to her, right?"

"Relax," Jake replied as Jeremiah reached for the crackers. "I won't say a word about her being pregnant. You can count on me."

That actually made him feel a lot more nervous as he opened up the container, broke a cracker in half and handed it to Jeremiah. "Okay. Just pretend you don't know a thing about it."

He watched Jeremiah get crumbs all over Jake's shirt as Jake checked his phone. "Sure. Hey, they landed. Cat said they're walking off the plane now."

Bradley checked his phone, but there was absolutely nothing from you, which was really strange. "Huh." He stood there awkwardly as he'd been left out of the loop, handing the other half of the cracker to Jeremiah when he reached for it. 

He watched Jake typing one handed, and then he said, "Apparently there was a ton of turbulence. Angel got pretty sick." When he met Bradley's eyes, he kind of shrugged. "Sounds like she's in bad shape."

Bradley ran his fingers through his hair until it was sticking up at an odd angle. "What's that supposed to mean? How is she in bad shape?" He looked over toward the partition that blocked off the area he wouldn't be able to get past without a boarding pass while he started to panic. Was he going to have to take you to the hospital or something? The cereal and potato chips he had for dinner started to sour in his stomach as he started walking in that direction. 

Then he saw you, and he started running. Cat had her arm around you, and she was carrying your tote bag along with her backpack while you sipped a can of ginger ale through a straw. Bradley could see fresh tears in your eyes as they met his. "Oh, Sweetheart."

"Roo," you croaked, and he closed the rest of the distance to you and carefully took you in his arms. "I was horrible."

Cat took the ginger ale from your hand, and you collapsed against him, a sobbing, shaking mess. "It's okay," he promised you. "You're home now, and I will take care of everything."

You nodded against his chest, and he let you cry. "I threw up so much. I was fine, but then it was really rough, and the baby hates me anyway." You cried harder, and then Jake was there with Jeremiah. He took the container of crackers so Bradley could rub your back with both hands. You hiccupped against him and mumbled, "You can say what you want. Cat knows. She guessed it. Then she took care of me."

Bradley wasn't surprised in the least that someone who had been pregnant before was able to tell that you were now. "Okay," he whispered, kissing the top of your head. He held you close and gave both Cat and Jake a stern look. "Do you want to go ahead and tell Jake?" he asked carefully. 

"Yeah," you groaned, leaning toward Jake slightly. "I'm pregnant."

If Jake didn't get Bradley out of this debacle safely, he was going to ban him from the home gym. But he should have known that above anything else in this scenario, Jake was going to have your back.

"Aww, Angel," he crooned as Jeremiah climbed into Cat's arms. "I'm so happy for you, mama." Then he kissed your cheek and winked at Bradley. "You'll be a natural, and ol' Rooster here's gonna be a class act. Now why don't you let him take you home? I can get the bin of your work stuff."

"You sure?" Bradley asked, giving Jake a discreet fist bump as you buried your face against his chest again. You were half burrowed inside his tropical print shirt at this point, and his undershirt was damp; he just wanted to get you home.

"We'll take care of it," Cat promised. "She's dehydrated. Make sure she drinks water or gatorade. And she needs to try to eat something." Jake handed the crackers back to Bradley. "Yeah, those might work, but she really needs to keep drinking."

"Got it," Bradley replied, kissing your forehead. "Thank you, Cat."

"It was my pleasure," she said with a smile as she cuddled Jeremiah. 

"Let's go, Baby Girl," Bradley whispered, leading you to get your suitcase as you sipped the ginger ale and nibbled on a cracker. He kept his hand at the small of your back as you sucked in deep breath after deep breath. "I'll get you home and into bed as quickly as possible."

You sniffed and looked up at him. "I just want you with me. That's all I wanted all week." 

Your lips quivered, and Bradley leaned in to kiss you as softly as he could. "That's all I wanted, too. I'm not going to leave your side." He kept you right there with him as he scooped up your luggage, and then he had his arm around you until he got you to the Bronco. With a kiss to your perfect cheek, he opened the door, helped you in, and buckled your seatbelt.

"Thanks, Roo," you sighed, eyes closed as you leaned back against the headrest, already looking more serene now that you and he were together.

"I would do anything for you." He stroked your belly with his fingertips. "Both of you."

Five minutes into the drive home, you were sound asleep, your fingers laced with his.

------------------------

I can already feel how much calmer she is just knowing she doesn't have as much to worry about with Bradley by her side. And he's going to be so much less stressed with her at home. It's looking like next chapter could be the last one in this series!!!! I'm hoping to do some one-shots for them and then pick up with another series? Please let me know what you'd like to see during and after her pregnancy. And thank you for reading! Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls

PART 35

@hotch-meeeeeuppppp

@chassy21

@solacestyles

@daisyhollyxox

@wintercap89

@blog-name6996

@bcon24

@chaoticassidy

@avada-kedavra-bitch-187

@katiebby04

@marantha

@averyhotchner

@abaker74

@heli991113

@k-k0129

@noz4a2

@shanimallina87

@little-wiseone

@ccbb2222

@xoxabs88xox

@thedroneranger

@cherrycola27

@fanboyswhore9

@xomrsalliej4787xo

@desert-fern

@sylviebell

@wkndwlff

@horseslovers2016

@gennyanydots

@mattyskies

@hookslove1592

@blahehblah

@sadpetalsstuff

@local-spidey

@schoollover

@lex-winchester

@magicalmorg

@nicole01-23

@jessicab1991

@happyrebelruins

@samsgoddess

@ughthisisntright

@bellaireland1981

@sagittarius-flowerchild

@mygyn

@yuckosworld

[airaibunny]

momo x reader - “it’s you” (warnings: smut[dom reader], angst with happy ending, sexual boundaries being pushed, crying, self deprecation, fingering, oral, heavy jealousy, spanking, cursing, degradation, slight praise, i feel like i’m forgetting something else…)

a/n: req!(“I’m obsessed with concept of being friends with benefits where the reader or member secretly has feelings for the other and gets jealous. If you could, could you do another friends w/ benefits but with Momo?”)okay, idk how this turned into angst like literally i went into it just wanting to make it rough sex. i rolled with it though, if it sucks pls tell me to stfu and stick to smut. hope you like this train wreck, mind you this was entirely written in 2 hours on a plane so like🙏

HEAVY HEAVY CONTENT WARNING, TAKE THE TAGS VERY SERIOUSLY PLEASE

word count: 2.3k

low moans fill your dorm room as the sweat makes your hair stick to your forehead. with your face between her thighs, momo’s sickeningly sweet scent engulfs your nose. you praise her every sound, “just like that, you sound so pretty,” you coo, “you’re doing so well for me.”

her release comes with a gasp and you greedily lap up everything spilling out of her. your tongue glides up and down her folds, devoted to letting her completely give out.

you come up, wiping your mouth with your fingers and licking her off of them. “you were wonderful as always.”

“hm.” she’s still not thinking clearly, her attempt at a response coming out as a moan. you laugh and get up to find your clothes.

“are you leaving?” she sits up in bed, wiping her hair out of her face. “we’ve been in here too long, they’re going to wonder what we’re doing.” she flops back down. “i’ll be out there in a few.”

after you put all your clothes on, you walk to the door. your hand lays on the doorknob motionless for a few seconds, deciding on whether it should turn it or not.

if you’re being honest with yourself, you don’t want to leave.

momo completely consumes every one of your thoughts. there’s not a single event in your day that you don’t connect to her. you can’t wait for the one or two hours a day you get to have her all to yourself, even if she just sees it as sex. when you’re with her, you swear the world outside could end and you wouldn’t notice. she has become your everything, but you’re not the same to her.

to her, you’re just a friend she casually fucks. nothing more, nothing less. of course you feel incredibly lucky that you at least get to have this, but you’d be lying if you said you didn’t yearn for more.

you want to tell everyone she’s yours and only yours, on all fronts.

but you can’t just bring it up to her, you would never be able to move on if she rejected you. even on days when she’s especially clingy and really makes you think she wants the same thing, you still tell yourself you’re over-analyzing.

“did you freeze?” she asks from behind you. you push the door and walk out, not making eye contact with her.

you start making your way to the kitchen to drink water and run into dahyun on the way there. “do you know if momo is in her room?” “she is.”

she walks away, but turns around again before leaving. “is she alone?”

‘why do you care?’

you think to yourself, of course you don’t respond with that, but it takes a great deal of self control not to.

“yes, she is.” you give her a fake smile and continue on your way to the kitchen.

“you’re so great at hiding when you’re angry.” mina teases as soon as she sees you. you roll your eyes at her and grab a glass of water. “were you with her just now?”

mina is the only person you’ve told about you and momo, your feelings for her included. it’s not that you don’t trust your other members; you just trust mina the most. with the others, there’s always a possibility that they might let it slip when they don’t mean to, but you know mina it’s ditzy enough to do that.

“yes.” you take a sip of your water and look down, trying to avoid mina’s gaze. “i’m tired of speaking to you about this, you know you’ll have to confess eventually. you’re destroying yourself, y/n.” she might not be telling anyone, but she sure as hell loves to hammer you about it.

“i know,” you sigh, “but how?” she walks beside you and pulls you into a hug. “you know what i have to say to that.” “yeah, yeah, whatever ‘it doesn’t matter how.’” she’s right, you’re very aware of that, but can’t bring yourself to do it.

“i’m going with everyone else, you coming?” you tell her you’ll be there shortly and let her leave. you stay sitting and contemplating your situation for a few more minutes until you decide to join your fellow members.

as soon as you walk into the living room your eyes dart towards momo, curled up next to dahyun. it instantly makes you see red, and very noticeably apparently because mina shoots you a knowing look.

you sit right across from them, glaring at them. you grit your teeth every time dahyun rubs momo’s leg or turns to whisper in her ear. you know that you all have a very close bond, and this is by no means out of the ordinary, but you can’t handle it when it involves with momo.

you also know she’s allowed to be with other people if so she desires, but if that’s what’s happening, is she really that shameless?

“y/n!?” jihyo yells beside you and you jump. “are you listening or just sitting there?” you are, in fact, not listening, too focused on the two people in front of you.

“sorry, i’m listening.”

“so what do you think?” you stare at her in confusion and your lie becomes evident. “ugh, never mind. i was saying that…” you tune her out again as you watch momo toss her head back in laughter at something dahyun said.

nothing could possibly be that fucking funny.

an hour passes of the same thing; momo and dahyun’s antics being met with your cold stare. that’s why you don’t waste a second when momo gets up and heads to the bathroom.

you make sure nobody can see down the hallway and follow her. she almost shuts the door, but you push it pack and step inside with her.

“oh sorry, i didn’t notice you.” she says, a fake pout on her lips.

“save it.” you walk closer to her, pushing her back until her ass hits the counter. “do you get off by being a slut on display, huh? does having people watch you be a whore turn you on?”

she smirks at you, acting like she’s completely unaware of what you’re saying. you see right through her, her rosy cheeks and labored breathing tell you she’s already dripping.

“what do you mean, are you jealous because of dahyun? do you not like seeing her touch me?” she gets really close, you can feel her breath on your neck.

fuck, even if you can tell what she’s doing, she knows how to push your buttons.

you grab her waist and turn her around, slamming her hips against the counter. she lets out a whine, but you’re too deep in your head to worry about whether it was in pain or pleasure.

“me, jealous?” you laugh, holding her in place, bent over the counter for you. “i just feel so bad for you. are you really that desperate? one girl isn’t enough, you need two?”

you rip off her shorts and panties, delighting in their soaked state. as soon as her ass is exposed, you land a hard hit on it. her back arches and you spank her again, harder. she whimpers with each slap and you can see her pussy growing wetter.

“that gets you really excited, look at that.” you dip your fingers between her folds, a silky string of her glistening slick attached to them when you take them off.

you grab her wrists behind her back, pulling her up by her hair at the same time. you think maybe you’re being a little too rough for a second, but your jealousy completely blinds you.

you shove her once again, against the door this time. you angrily let go of her hair and your hand flys to her ass, spanking her again. your own pussy throbs when you can perfectly make out your hand print on it.

“ow, y/n…” a tears rolls down her cheek and you chuckle at her. “oh c’mon, i thought you liked being treated like a bitch.”

another tear comes, then another. you’d normally ask her if she was alright, but you’re truly not yourself in this moment. seeing her so close with dahyun awakened something you didn’t know you had in you.

you fingers dive right into her entrance without teasing or warning, making her cry out.

“y/n, that hurts!”

her tears don’t stop. you’ve never been this way with her, but now you’re thinking you should’ve done this sooner. she looks absolutely stunning breaking down for you.

“crocodile tears, you know you love this.” she sobs, whining every time your fingers harshly re-enter her.

“they’re not, please…”

you hear her, but you don’t process what she’s saying. “oh shut the fuck up, whore.” another slap on her ass, right on top of the red handprint from before.

“stop, please, stop!”

only when she’s repeatedly begging you to stop do you remove your fingers and ease up, realizing you were basically cutting off her breathing with how hard you were pressing her against the door.

her legs immediately give out on her and she nearly falls to the ground, but you catch her before she does so.

you’re still in shock at what you just did, muttering countless apologies to her. she doesn’t react, just cries.

you hurriedly put her clothes back on and lead her to her bedroom, looking down the hallway to make sure none of the other girls can see you.

you lock the door when you step inside and carry her to the bed. “i’m sorry, i’m so sorry.” your own tears form in your eyes, you feel like a monster. why are you crying? you’re the one who did this to her. if you love her so much, why’d you do this?

“momo, i’m sorry.” her sobs keep coming, each one deepening your wound even more.

“why were you like that?” she asks, wiping some of the still cascading tears from her face. you stay silent, too ashamed to give her an honest reply. “i don’t deserve an answer?”

“i went too far, i’m sorry.” you turn away, not wanting her to see your tears. she pulls your shoulder and makes you face her. “but why?” your heart breaks as you get a good look at her beautiful eyes completely bloodshot, and her rosy cheeks red and sticky with tears.

“because i’m a fucking idiot, and i kept things in for too long, and i just let them all pour out in the worst way possible. i’m sorry momo, i’m so, so sorry.” you break down, sobbing just as hard as she is. “i’ve,” you think about your next words very carefully, “i’ve loved you for so long, momo. i didn’t know how to say it. my incompetence just ended up hurting you, i’m so sorry.”

you feel even worse as her hand trembles on your cheek, wiping away the tears. you take it into your own, turning your face to kiss it.

“you’re not incompetent,” you cut her off. “no, don’t console me, i’m not the one in need of that.” she moves closer to you, settling in on your shoulder and grabbing both of your hands in hers. you can still see the tears falling from her eyes and onto her lap, only serving to make your own sorrows multiply.

“i haven’t been the brightest either.” you turn your face to look at her and she does the same. “asking you to just have sex with me seemed easier than asking you to be my girlfriend.”

you’re in utter shock for a few seconds, her sentence hitting you like a train.

all of this performing and going around in circles you’ve been doing for so long because you thought she didn’t feel the same way, you could’ve skipped all of that?

you should be ecstatic about this, but you won’t let yourself. you hurt her, you hurt her really bad. how could she ever forgive you?

“i’m so sorry i didn’t say anything sooner.” she starts audibly crying again and buries her head into your neck. you lift her face up, holding it in your hands. “why are you apologizing? don’t do that, please, don’t apologize to me for anything.”

for the first time in however many months this has been happening, she crashes her lips into yours. kissing always felt like a thing for couples in a weird way, which you both stressed you weren’t.

“momo…” she closes the distant between you two again, making your lips connect. you don’t try pulling away this time, you let her take the lead. the kiss is deep and passionate, perfectly matched to her lips. right now, her lips feel infinitely better on your own than they do anywhere else on your body. she’s heavenly; too good for you.

“momo, i’m so sorry.”

“i forgive you, y/n, i’ll always forgive you.”

more tears spill out of your eyes, how could she forgive you? “you can’t do that.”

her own tears still stain her face as she grabs your shirt into a fist, making you foreheads touch. “you do not get decide that for me.” she pauses to kiss you again. “i want you, i want you so bad, and you’re not going to pull away now that i know you feel the same way.” she sniffles, looking into your eyes while coming up with her next words.

“please don’t pull away.” you take her into your arms, you both still gasping for air from crying.

“i won’t.”

you wipe the hair from her face, wanting to admire every little detail.

“i love you so much, i’ll never make you feel like that again, i promise.”

she looks at you with pure admiration in her eyes.

“i love you too, and i believe you.”

[winterrrnight]

okay so I have another one but I don't know if it kinda fits in, so feel free to ignore it!!

bsf!Rafe and reader are sleeping at Tannyhill like usual after a party, and it might be the drugs, might be the alcohol, or might be the simple fact that he's been on edge with Ward in the past few weeks, but he's been having nightmares.

he suddenly wakes up after a nightmare of losing reader because of his dad or something like that, all sweaty and shit, and reader is already awake, grabbing his face in between her hands and whispering to him that he's okay and that wasn't real, she's here and they're okay.

-🦉

thank you so so much🦉for this request ugh I love it so so much 🫶🏼 I hope I did it justice!! and to anyone reading, I’m always open to discuss about bsf!rafe <3

bsf!rafe can’t bear a single thought of him losing you… <3 listen to close enough to feel you by luke hemmings for this one <3 cw: brief mentions of alcohol and weed consumption, angst, nightmares, ward tries to take r away from rafe in his dream, mentions of anxiety and panic, hurt/comfort <3

part of this little universe <3

this happens quite a lot more than you’d like.

rafe throws yet another party at tanneyhill, and you’re of course one of the most elite persons attending it. you get special access to the most expensive alcohols; the ones which belong to his dad and rafe digs them out from the wine cellar, and to the best special imported weed; that you unfortunately still don’t know how he gets his hands on.

you’re also always the last one left at the party, when you both are drunk out of your minds. rafe is always just slightly more balanced than you, and it’s always extremely easy for him to convince you to stay with him over the night. sometimes, just a simple ‘stay’ murmured warmly against the shell of your ear does it for you.

it’s another one of those nights, you next to rafe under his sheets in some of his clothes; clothes that you will always love a lot more than your own. rafe is lying on his back and you’re cuddled into his side, your arm thrown casually over his waist as you remain drowned in your deep slumber.

rafe is in a slumber of his own, but it’s not warm and cozy like yours. it’s more irritable, bringing memories he’d much rather forget, creating scenarios he wishes would never come to existence, and they all center around one person: his dad.

his dad, who never let rafe escape his deeply critical stare, who always made him feel incomplete and inadequate despite being his first born, who wrecked his feelings regarding love and compassion and rooted a deeply sown anxiety in him.

the dreams feel a little too real than he would like, his eyes shut tightly as creases form in the corners of his eyes, the corners of his lips starting to pull down in a frown, and his body starting to subtly squirm under the ever increasing pressure of the uncomfortable dreams.

the scene becomes too vivid, and the scenario comes completely in focus. rafe is standing facing ward, and he can feel his heart rate pick up pace. behind ward he can make out a silhouette of someone standing behind him, completely covered by ward’s figure. with a subtle shift in ward’s position, the view of the person standing behind him comes completely clear to rafe, the vision causing his heart to almost stop beating and his eyes to widen, his entire mind plagued with anxiety.

it’s you.

you are completely panic stricken as ward keeps you in place with his hands holding onto your wrists in a bruising grip. tear tracks stain your cheeks and more tears drop down from your waterline. your bottom lip quivers as you attempt to say something, but with the fear of ward holding onto you not just physically but also emotionally and mentally seems to be holding you back.

“let go of her,” come out rafe’s words: low, yet completely cold and straightforward. words which shouldn’t leave any room for argument.

a twisted smile forms on ward’s face as he tightens his grip on your wrists, causing you to let out a shuddering gasp at the feeling of his fingertips digging harshly into your skin.

“I said, let go of her!”

rafe’s voice takes on a higher pitch, his words coming out as yells. he can feel his blood boiling in his veins. rafe attempts to clamber for ward, wanting to pry his hands off you and keep you far, far away from him, but the moment he tries to bring one foot forward, he realises he can’t.

an invisible force keeps him tethered to the ground, and his attempts to even take the smallest of steps prove futile.

he is left with nothing except a vision blurred with tears, a voice which is starting to die down from his screaming of your name as he watches ward take you away from him, your voice yelling out his name echoing in his mind.

rafe wakes up almost immediately, sitting up straight in bed with a jolt as he feels a cold sweat break down on his face. his heart rate seems to be clambering for higher numbers, and a high pitched sound rings in his ears. he’s panting heavily as the ringing in his ears only seems to be getting louder.

“rafe!” your voice cuts through all the strong anxieties in his mind as he feels you sit next to him, your hands instantly reaching out for him as you wrap your arms around his neck and pull him in an embrace.

“oh my god oh my god oh my god…” rafe stutters into the crook of your neck as he wraps his arms around your waist. “oh god you’re here…”

“hey hey hey you’re okay,” you whisper softly in his ear. you have no idea what happened: all you know is you woke up to the loud creaking of the bed when he jolted up. the moonlight entering the room shone exceptionally brighter on his face, the sweat highlighting under the white light.

“fuck…” he whispers hoarsely into your skin, his grip tightening on your waist. no words in the english language can explicate how relieved his mind is to realise that was a dream, and you’re safe in his arms.

“you’re okay rafe, you’re okay…” you mumble over and over in his ear, gently rocking him back and forth as you begin to rub your hands over his bare back, trying to provide him all the comfort he may need through your physical closeness.

rafe attempts to speak against your skin, words which tell you what the dream was, and how humongous the relief is to realise none of it was real. but his mind and heart still feel completely ridden with his anxieties and the words barely make it out of his throat, most of them dying halfway through.

you can hear his feeble attempts at speaking, and although you don’t exactly catch what he’s trying to say, you make out the words ‘you’, ‘lost’, and ‘dad’, and that is more than enough for you to know exactly how strong of a toll the dream took on him.

you softly shush him, letting one hand slip into his hair as you softly thread your fingers through it, letting him snuggle against you as much as he wants.

“you’re okay,” you whisper. “you’re okay, we’re okay. I’m not going anywhere. ward isn’t here. it’s only you and me, okay? just you and me,”

just you and him.

just you and him.

just you and him.

“just you and me…” he whispers meekly, and you nod.

“just you and me, rafe, just you and me,” you whisper back, not stopping your movements on his back and in his hair.

those four words seem to have a calming effect stronger than anything else he’s ever experienced before. before he knows it, he can feel his heart rate beginning to relax, his mind finally gaining some control over his thoughts.

it’s just you and him. always and forever.

[katelynnwrites]

You Kiss Me In A Way (That’s Gonna Screw Me Up Forever) | Sydney Lohmann

warnings: smut so read at your own discretion

word count: 898

summary: sydney's kisses are something else and have screwed you up forever

a/n: smut for syd that nobody has been writing and that nobody has asked for but was the product of my procrastination yesterday so here you are

Sydney’s always been good at kissing you. She gives tender, loving kisses and soft, affectionate ones. She is amazing at delicate good morning kisses and magnificent ‘I’m sorry’ kisses.

The blonde has gifted you with so many of them over the years. From the messy, exploring ones of your childhood to the smooth and confident ones she grants you with today.

You know she’s spoiled you with them.

She is doing it now, languidly letting her lips slant over yours, leaving you breathless and desperately wanting more.

Her fingers slide themselves into your hair and her hips press against yours in the best way possible.

Syd isn’t a patient person by any means, her collection of yellow cards from arguing with referees can attest to that but she has all the time in the world for you.

Your girlfriend’s lips trace a path down your throat and across your collarbones, drawing needy gasps from you.

She smiles against your skin, moving lower down your body and reaching your stomach.

You tense, your muscles going taunt.

The blonde eagerly scatters more kisses on your exposed skin, adjusting herself as she goes.

Syd eventually reaches the waistband of your sleep shorts and she teasingly slips her fingers under it.

‘Sonnenschein please.’ You whimper.

She laughs, placing placating kisses onto the inside of your thighs.

You groan as she sucks little marks into your skin.

‘Sydney…Sydney please.’ You beg.

Your girlfriend hums, tapping your thigh gently in a way that you know means have patience.

Huffing in frustration, you sink further back into your girlfriend’s bed and bring your arms up to cover your eyes.

‘Hey none of that. I want to see your face.’ The midfielder insists.

She lightly tugs your arms down, giving you one of her ‘I’m sorry’ kisses.

When you open your eyes again, it’s to Sydney smirking cockily down at you.

‘Want to see how pretty you look when I make you come.’

You blush bright pink in response.

The Bayern player then follows it up with teasing kisses and reverent touches, eventually giving you what you want and taking both your shorts and underwear off.

She holds your thighs open, hands both firm and gentle.

‘Love you.’ She promises, right before she properly puts her mouth on you.

Any answer that you were formulating is cut off by the sharp, pleasured gasp that spills forth.

Sydney takes her time, switching between licking and kissing.

Kisses pressed against your clit might be your girlfriend’s way of sending you to heaven.

Your breathy moans of the blonde’s name grow in volume and that spurs her on to fully commit to making you come with her tongue alone.

You are not even aware of your hand finding its way down to Sydney’s head and tugging lightly on her hair until she groans right into you.

The vibrations make you whimper and the German woman takes full advantage. She sucks harshly on your clit, relishing in the way your hips jerk upwards immediately.

‘Syd!’ You cry out.

Your girlfriend continues on, her mouth working wonders. Her hands have tightened their grip on your legs, keeping them as still as she can.

‘Feels so good. S-So good.’ You stutter.

If you weren’t so drawn in by the pleasure the blonde is giving you, you would have rolled your eyes at how pleased she looks with herself.

You moan loudly again as her tongue circles your clit.

The midfielder has completely dedicated herself to your climax now, touching your body in a way only she knows how and pushing you over the edge in a way that only she can.

The whimpers and cries that escape you as soon as that happens make Sydney smile. Her name is mixed into those and she loves how wrecked it sounds as it falls from your lips.

Your girlfriend slowly works you through it, licking you lightly and placing a series of gentle kisses onto your cunt as your thighs tremble around her face.

‘Sonnenschein.’ You sigh contentedly when she finally sits up, wiping your juices off her mouth with the back of her hand.

She grins widely, moving to lie down beside you as you catch your breath. Sydney reaches for your hand and intertwines her fingers with yours, bringing your hand up to her lips so that she can place a kiss onto the back of your palm.

That’s another kind of kiss that she loves giving you.

It’s subtle enough that she can do it on the pitch and on team walks so she does so all the time.

Sydney has ruined you with her kisses, properly screwed you up forever with them.

She has the ability to make your heart race, to steal the air right out of your lungs and to comfort you with them.

You’ll never be able to kiss anyone who isn’t her because there is no one who will be able to make you feel the way you do when your girlfriend kisses you.

She makes you feel safe, protected, cherished and loved. So incredibly loved that it’s like you are the only girl in the whole world.

When your chest finally rises and falls evenly, you squeeze the blonde’s hand before moving to straddle her.

Syd’s pretty eyes widen considerably and you giggle.

‘It’s my turn to help you out of your clothes now no?’

German Translation:

sonnenschein - sunshine

[lost-in-fiction-like-ur-mom]

Established wrecker relationship with a newborn and lots of fluff and cuddles.

Bundle of Joy

Wrecker x Reader

Summary- Wrecker is scared he might hurt your newborn baby. You reassure him he won't, and that he is a good father.

A/N- Warning for descriptions of birth! Thank you for requesting! I love this prompt, Wrecker would be so careful with a tiny baby!

Word Count- 1,344

You weren't due for another week, you were supposed to be on Pabu for your delivery. With lots of midwives and doctors who had helped with past births. That just wasn't in the cards for you though.

Tech made an emergency landing on the closest inhabitable planet he could find. There was no time to get to Pabu, and it wasn't safe to jump into hyperspace while in labor.

You screamed loud, gripping the closest thing as tight as you could. Unlucky for Wrecker- it was his hand. You were insanely nervous, nothing was going according to plan. Wrecker was doing little to help, he was freaking out himself.

You took deep breaths the second your contraction was over. Wrecker swept hair out of your face and rubbed your arm, trying his best to keep you calm.

"We have landed." Tech called back, a green hue cast over the ship. Whatever planet you landed on was either abandoned or had a low population.

"I'm scared Wrecker." You breathed in again, "How am I going to have this baby on a shi-" You cut yourself off, screaming in pain as a new contraction hit.

You reached over, hitting Wrecker on the arm. "You are never touching me again, I cannot believe I married you!" You yelled at him. Pain clouded your thoughts.

"I know, I know, I'm sorry!" He worried, also frightened on what would happen. You were on an abandoned planet with no doctor!

Hunter and Omega also sat close by, getting everything you requested. Omega had refreshed a cold rag a dozen times now, and promptly placed Lula by your side.

Tech and Echo talked in the Cock-pit, you didn't know what about. Though it dulled the pain to think on what it was.

"What do you need?" Omega sweetly asks after you stop screaming.

"I need to know the plan." Inhale, exhale, "What's going to happen?"

"I do not know why everyone is freaking out. I am fully equipped to deliver a child." Tech chimes in, that must have been what they were talking about.

His words did bring you comfort, as your original plan involved Tech being there to make sure everything was going by the book.

"Get her on the floor, bring lots of pillows. We need her slightly elevated." Tech took over shortly after he made sure the ship was settled.

Hunter brought Omega outside after you started spewing insults and profanities to Wrecker. You were a completely different person when in pain.

Echo stayed on board to make sure Wrecker didn't do anything stupid, and to help Tech if needed.

About an hour later, screaming, hitting, and pushing- your baby girl was born.

"It's a girl."

You panted heavily, "Give her to me Tech, please." Tech immediately grabbed his knife and cut the front of your shirt open.

"Hey! Wha-" Wrecker was confused, only seeing Tech ripping your top off.

"Wrecker, it's so the baby can feel her skin." Echo informed, holding Wrecker back slightly.

Tech rested the child on your chest, then moved back down to cut the umbilical cord.

You gasped and gently held her to your chest. "Oh thank you Makers, thank you!" You had tears running down your face, slowly caressing your baby's cheek.

"Wrecker, come here. Some see your daughter." You waved him over, all of a sudden regretting your snide comments made earlier.

He joined your side quickly, resting his large palm on the top of your sweaty head. "She's perfect..."

He lowered his head, face only an inch from the baby's. "She looks just like you..."

You sniffled a laugh, "She looks like a potato right now, Wreck."

"No, look. She has your eyes." Just as he said that, she peaked an eye open, looking at her father for the first time.

"Sweet baby." You commented.

"Hey, i'm sorry about what I said earlier. I didn't know what I was saying." You apologized, not wanting Wrecker to think he was purposefully the cause of your pain.

"You did such a good job." He gave a loud chuckle, "I was more scared than you!"

You smiled at him.

"Have Wrecker hold the baby, you have to pass the placenta now." Tech pressed down on your stomach, moving the placenta down.

"Here, Wrecker." You slowly lifted her to him. His face dropped, he was terrified.

"It's okay, she's tiny but strong." You assured him.

"Uh, I don't know..." He breathed heavily.

Your face screwed in pain again, though not near as bad as before.

"Wrecker!"

"Okay, okay." He picked her up, as softly and carefully as a man his size could muster, He was shaking in fear he would hurt her. She was just so small.

Wrecker had a past of knocking over or accident breaking things, he was just so big. He forgot sometimes. He certainly did not forget now. He watched the child like a hawk.

It didn't take long before Tech finished helping you pass the placenta. Immediately after you were able to, Wrecker passed her back into your arms.

After a moment of silence and the four of you admiring the baby, Echo chimed in.

"Tech and I will give you some space." He guided the two of them outside of the ship, with Hunter and Omega.

"Wrecker, it's okay. She's fine." You looked up into the eyes of the man that had made you forever happy.

"What are we going to name her?" He said, effectively changing the conversation.

You huffed, but figured you could talk to him about holding her later. "What about Myla?" You asked.

"Perfect." He said, once again leaning down to get a good look at her. He held his finger out, tickling the baby's foot.

A few minutes later, you sent Wrecker to get everyone. You knew Omega would be beaming to see the baby.

"What is it, what is it! Tech wouldn't tell!" She practically bounced in, but slowed down when she came to your side.

"Meet Myla, your niece."

"She's so beautiful." She said, leaning on her arm while admiring the baby.

Wrecker smiled at the scene.

It had been an uneventful flight home, you were in overprotective mode. Even though you trusted everyone on the ship with your life, you didn't let anyone else hold Myla. She slept the whole way back.

You and Wrecker decided to settle down in your home on Pabu that was pre-prepared for this day. Many of the Pabu citizens already knew of the birth, but gave you your space.

You sat up in your bed, Myla cradled in your arms. She quickly fell asleep after being fed. Wrecker joined you, being overly careful in getting under the sheets.

"Do you want to hold her?" You asked, looking at him sit up next to you.

"Oh uh, I don't want to wake her. Probably best if you just hold her." You sighed at this. Your hormones were still wack, and you teared up at his answer.

"What's wrong, what'd I do?" He softly asked, a hand coming to your arm.

You sniffled, taking a few breathes before speaking "Why won't you hold her?"

"I don't want to hurt Myla." He said, nervous for your response.

You blinked, readjusting Myla in your arms. "Wrecker, I promise you will be okay. She is tough, just like her daddy."

He looked at her, still unsure. "Look, just take her. if anything happens i'm right here."

You raised your arms, handing her over. She 'cooed' but stayed asleep.

"See, she knows you're her dad." You rubbed your face on his arm, wrapping your arms around him. He was tense, caught up in the feeling of holding her.

"Move your arm up a little." You guided him, but it soon felt natural for him.

A deep breath left him lips. He was finally comfortable.

"Not so bad huh?"

With a swallow he answered, "The two most perfect girls in the world."

You nuzzled further into his side, trusting his hold on Myla.

"Thank you for giving me this..."

A/N- Thank you so much for reading!

Tags- (lmk if you want to be tagged as well!) @thethreeeyed-raven @dangraccoon @knight-of-flowerss

[adventuringblind]

Celebratory Kissing?

Logan Sargeant X Reader X Oscar Piastri

Genre: Fluffy smut

Summary: Oscar gets his first win and celebratory activities ensue.

Warnings: dom/sub dynamics, switch Logan if you squint, subspace for reader and Logan (eventually), SOFT dom Oscar (a simp is what he is), oral (both receiving), fingers, unprotected sex (don't try this at home kids), Praise, oral fixation, marking/biting

Notes: Another request! haven't done a smut in a while. I might be a wee bit rusty...

Side note: I finished this mere hours after I had to put my dog down 😬

Masterlist // Request Form // My Website // buy me a Ko-Fi

A sprint win is still a win. An argument she is determined to put to an end should Oscar tell her otherwise. This is an achievement and should be recognized as such.

Logan appears in front of her. His body absolutely gleaming with sweat and hair tussled from his helmet. "You look wrecked."

"The good kind I hope." She hands him the water she's holding, and he holds eye contact while trying to drink it. Only to fail miserably and dump it everywhere.

"It's about fifty-fifty. Half like Oscar just ruined you and the other half like you might be sick."

"Jokes on you, I probably am!"

She stares at the McLaren garage where Oscar has been swept off to. "Do you think he'll accept it as a win?"

"Maybe, I'm not sure yet." Logan crosses his arms and follows her gaze. "We could always convince him it's a win." He wiggles his eyebrows. The last part coming out quieter.

"But you two have to race tomorrow!"

"And I'm not suggesting anything crazy, I would like to be able to walk still. That doesn't mean we can't make it good."

She hums thoughtfully at the proposal. "He won't go for it."

"Trust me, he will." Logan takes his hand in hers and swings their arms back and forth. "We've been doing this for almost two years now. I think we can bring it out of him."

"Lo, I swear to god, if you get us in trouble, I will never let you hear the end of it."

~~~~~

She really shouldn't have been so shocked when Logan dragged her back to the hotel promising Oscar a 'surprise' for his victory. The Aussie had given them a questioning look, but just shrugged them off. A quick word about staying hydrated was thrown in there.

Now she's sitting on the edge of the bed, freshly showered and patiently waiting for Logan to tell her what his plan it. He's been digging through Oscar's luggage for the last five minutes mumbling about disorganization.

Finally, he pulls out the tightly wound coil of rope and makes a triumphant 'ah-ha' sound.

"You were looking for rope?"

"Yup!"

"And what are you going to do with said rope? Oscar is the only one with enough patience to manage any kind of Shabari-" Logan shuts her up by starting to tie the rope around her wrist.

"This okay?"

"It would be more okay if you told me what we were doing." She huffs in annoyance.

Logan rolls his eyes dramatically. "Figured I'd put you down first. Get you to that headspace that drives him feral."

She has to suppress the whine that threatens to leave her throat. "What about you?"

"One of us has to be coherent until he gets here. He can do what he wants after that. We just need him to see you first." Logan finishes the rope on her wrists, successfully securing them behind her back. "Not saying I'm not enticing, mind you. I just know how to put you down faster than the other way around."

Which - okay, Logan isn't wrong there. Oscar seems to hit the sweet spot with him where she can't. Not for a lack of trying, she just does not have the tone of voice that send her American partner over the edge. "Well played, Sargeant."

"I thought it was clever." She can't see him, still settled behind her. It doesn't matter. She knows he's smirking; can feel it in the open-mouthed kisses he's placing on her spine. It's ridiculous how much simple touch affects her.

"You slip so easily."

"Shut up."

It doesn't help that she's completely bare. Logan still has his sweats on, which only makes her feel vulnerable.

His hands trace the outline of her curves. They drag against the more sensitive areas with a nimble sort of ease. She lets out a happy sigh in response.

His teeth latch onto her shoulder. He bites and sucks a mark that will definitely be visible tomorrow. Logan's always had an oral fixation. Constantly chewing on the ends of his hoodie strings, chewing on pens and pencils, the sheer number of lollys in the house is ungodly. Oscar has used this to his advantage too many times to count. Zoom meeting at the number one offender.

Logan manages to bite all the way down her arm. He slips himself lower to get a better angle on her hips. Fingers bruise her thighs with an impossibly iron grip that he really doesn't need to have.

He attaches to her neck, spinning her around so face him. Logan slides his wet tongue from her throat to her lips. He shoves his tongue down her throat without warning. Successfully making it so she can't breathe; suffocated but only him. Only Logan and his stupidly nimble tongue exist in this moment.

He lets her breath again, only to push her backward onto the bed. Saliva drips all across her body as his tongue slides downwards.

Logan's is panting against her by the time he's finally in between her legs. "You're terribly wet, baby." He licks everywhere except where she needs him most. "Do you want my tongue? Are you going to be good for me while we wait for Osc?"

"I promise - please Lo, need you."

All sense of coherency leaves the second Logan's tongue starts lapping up her arousal. His hands grip her thigs to keep them spread apart.

Her hands would be in his hair if they could. instead, they grip the sheets underneath her. Anything to keep somewhat present. It doesn't work. Her mind is already swimming while the blonde moans into her core, teeth grazing her clit and driving her to the brink of insanity.

Her legs shake as his tongue slips in and out of her. She chokes out his name, on getting close to the point of no return.

He pulls away. Not fully, just enough to stop contact. Went tongue retreating through glistening lips.

IN the background, the sound of the door unlocking startles them both. Logan frantically strips the rest of his clothes in record time, helps her to the floor and manages to get them both into some kind of waiting position.

"I hope whatever you to are planning involves sleep at some point-" Oscar flicks the lights on and she can feel his eyes burning holes into them. "Please tell me you haven't been like this for the last hour?"

They shake their heads no as Oscar looks them over. He grabs Logan's chin and swipes his tongue across the American's bottom lip. "You taste like her. Tell me what you did."

"Got her ready for you."

"I can see that. She's staring at us with that look in her eyes." Oscar moves to her next, dropping Logan's chin and softly patting her cheek. She keens into his touch, aching for some kind of contact again. "Is this my surprise? A good night with two beautifully obedient partners?" His voice is soft with a hint of a condescending tone.

"Wanted to make sure you know that it's a win." There it is. He has Logan in the palm of his hand, whining and slurring his words.

Oscar looks like he might melt. "I think I've already won everything I need to. I have you two kneeling in front of me. That being said, you've got me worked up and it would be a shame not to take advantage of your wonderful surprise."

Oscar undoes the rope around her wrists and helps them up off their knees and onto the bed. "Nothing hard tonight. I'd hate for you to be sore tomorrow, Lo." He kisses them both. Hands gripping their chins and alternating who's mouth he's exploring.

It's heaven. The place with these two. The fuzzy, floaty feeling in her mind only registers them and their touches.

"You did good with her, Lo. Bet you're ready to go, yeah?"

It's the first time she's actually seen how hard the American is. Oscar strokes him a few times, slowly, thumb swiping away the pre-cum that had leaked out.

Oscar jams two fingers into her without warning. "Wow, you really did get her ready. Was this all your tongue baby?"

A third finger slips in. She's dripping liquid all the way down to his wrist. The pathetic whining sounds she's making are outrageous and should be embarrassing. She's to blissed out to care.

Oscar manhandles them to where he wants. Her body shudders as she accepts Logan's length, straddling over the top of him. "Come on, love. You want to make him feel good, yes?" She'd want to do anything Oscar tells her to, really, but she can't say as much.

Regardless, she rolls her hips and moans at the feeling. Logan's mouth goes slack, and Oscar takes the opportunity to slam his dick into Logan's mouth.

It doesn't take her horribly long to get close again. The skin on skin and roll of hips. The impatience of Logan as he tries to buck his hips upward in time with her.

"Osc, please." He crashes his lips onto hers and moans into her mouth.

He pulls away just a tiny bit and clasps a hand around her throat. "Go ahead, cum for be."

Logan slams up into her a few more times before he finishes. She lets herself fall into the abyss of white-hot pleasure. Brain only focused on one thing.

She can hear Logan coughing as Oscar slams into his throat.

It all ends too fast for her liking, and she looks at Oscar expectantly. Waiting and wanting for more.

Oscar pulls her off Logan and lays her body down on top of him. The Aussie take his time exploring their shivering bodies. The amount of concealer they are going to need tomorrow will be ungodly.

"This doesn't feel like the celebratory kissing I'd hoped for," whines Logan.

"Tell you two what: If I can get second tomorrow then I'll make sure neither of you can walk for a week." Oscar huffs. "Also, I'd appreciate it if we could refrain from calling it celebratory kissing."

"But it's tradition!"

"I feel like we've came a bit farther then just celebratory kisses..."

[bellewintersroe]

Daniel Ricciardo x HornerDaughter! Reader- smut

Part 8?! Holy shit, I’m enjoying writing this series so much.

Warnings: Explicit mentions of sexual intercourse, angst, slight argument? I don’t want to give too much away…

Slightly prompted by @urfriendlywriter with “look at me when I'm making you feel good, baby" with Daniel because 🥵🥵🥵🥵

Daniel and y/n reunite and he’s a nervous wreck. Although being overwhelmed with the anticipation of the Hungarian GP looming, he’s still torn about their secretive situation. He is weak in the knees, however, and can’t help but end up back in her Hotel room for the night. Any confusion is momentarily dispersed, until she brings up a topic of conversation that has Daniel feeling on edge.

“Daniel!” She giddily exclaims, greeting the taller man for a hug. For an onlooker, including her dad, it would just look like an exchange between two friends reuniting, to them however, it meant something completely different. His heart was pounding as he greeted her into his arms, the smile undeniable hard to resist as his stomach turned to mush whilst her body pressed up against his. She smelt so good, he thought, and she looked beautiful, his hands were clammy and she offered him a smile before they broke apart. With her face so close to his, Daniel thought she might kiss him. That was until her embrace was then placed on Checo, embracing him in what seemed to be an equally happy greeting. She knew different, her hug with Daniel was something she’d been dying for all week. It was now Thursday, a day before the practice rounds for the Hungarian GP, and time for her had moved so, incredibly slowly. “C’mon you, have you finished your work?” Christian then asked, stopping her chatter with Checo. “Ah-“ she turned around, embarrassed by the comment. “Yes, dad. I’m not 12.” She blinked with a funny tone causing a couple of the men around to crack up. Daniel saw the saw the way men around here would look at her, eyes quickly glancing down her dress clad body, they’d gaze at her face longingly, giggling like kids whenever she’d walk in a room. He always cringed at it, feeling an odd sense of protectiveness- but then he’d come to the realisation he was just the same as them.

“Ah, you’ll always be my baby.” Christian responded, ruffling her hair slightly as she grumbled out, scurrying away to avoid further embarrassment. Daniel felt his eyes follow her, his head even tilted a little seeing her disappear out of the room quicker than he’d liked. “She’ll chat your ear off.” Christian joked, looking Daniel in the eye. The Australian snapped his attention back, forcing a laugh and shaking his head nervously. He couldn’t give him eye contact, he’d been railing his daughter for the past several weeks now…

——————————————-

God, it had felt like months since Daniel was last inside of her. She looked fucking angelic as he pushed his cock into her, arms pinned above her on the bed as he swung his hips harshly into hers. “Daniel!” She gasped, hands nudging to be released before she grabbed at his bare back, head lolling around in pleasure. With each thrust her tits bounced leaving Daniel mesmerised, squeezing and groping at them. Her lips were slightly parted, sweet moans escaping as her fingers moved down to rub over her pussy. Any of Daniels prior panicked thoughts had been quickly displaced when she began rubbing her ass into him during an extremely busy lift ride up to the room.

Daniel growled, feeling himself stupidly close to cumming despite being inside of her for a mere two minutes. He pulled out, replacing his cock with his fingers as he sunk two of them into her dripping cunt. “Fuck!” She squeaked, attempting to squirm her way up onto her elbows. Daniel’s free hand pushed her back down to the bed. “I love it when you’re like this.” She gasped, eyes slightly wide as he swallowed thickly at her words, scanning over her face that he couldn’t get enough of. If he wasn’t so desperate to have his cock inside her, he’d fuck that little mouth of hers so good.

He was panting slightly, mouth agape as he watched her with a hungry expression, one she simply couldn't resist as she cried out, feeling his fingers twitch inside her. “Yeah?” He responded, almost cockily to her little whines. It’s like she’d coerced him out of his shy exterior, and spending some time apart riled him up like no other. “That good?” He muttered, quickening the pace as she choked out a cry, nodding, her head turning away. “Fuck.” Daniel cursed, feeling how tight she was around his fingers. Her cunt was so deliciously tight, in fact, he knew he’d never been with somebody who wrapped around him so good.

“Look at me, baby.” He then repeated, desiring to see her desperate eyes on him before he fully fucked her with his fingers. “Daniel!” She whined out, head rolling back up but her eyes were still closed. He reached forwards, taking her by the jaw and pushing her cheeks together slightly.

“Look at me when I'm making you feel good, baby.” His voice came out as more of a demand, to this she obeyed his order and her eyes opened again. “Harder.” She pouted. “Good girl.” He exhaled against her lips, kissing her harshly before increasing the pace as he fucked his fingers in and out of her so overwhelmingly fast she found herself screaming, Daniel not letting her cover up one sound that left her lips as she squirted all down his veiny arm. “Good girl!” He repeated, clearly proud as he moved down for another kiss.

“Fuck me, Daniel.” She hushed, snatching his hair as he let out a soft moan at the painful tug. He couldn’t resist as he crawled back between her legs, pushing his cock with ease into her lubricated pussy. He continued with the same pace before, arms at either side on her as she reached up, stroking at the back of his neck and then his cheek. The act made Daniel soften inside, dropping his head with a curse before he’d slowed his pace and found himself lifting her closer to him.

“C’mere… up here, baby.” He whispered, needing her body flush against his as he lifted her into his lap. “You want me to ride you like this?” She cooed, beginning to rock her hips teasingly over the outside of his cock. Daniel searched each of her eyes, feeling all control leave his body as her fingers trailed over the tip of his cock.

“Do you?” She repeated, barely a whisper. “Yeah.” He hushed, moving closer to give her a kiss but she purposefully moved her away. “Please.” He repeated, a little harsher as a smirk grew on her face, sinking down over his cock, listening to the delicious moan she’d pulled from his chest.

His hips also rocked against hers, arms wrapping around her waist as they embraced, making out whenever they could as she sucked on his tongue. “Want you to cum like this, inside me- fuck, you feel so good.” She kissed at his jawline, Daniel keeping his head against her shoulder out of pure comfort. “Inside you?” He repeated as she lifted her hips higher, causing more of a friction for them both whenever she dropped back onto his cock.

“Inside me, Danny.” She let out a moan as he gripped her close. For a few moments they were just enjoying the fucking, moaning back to one another as they shared moments of intense eye contact. Daniel stroked over her cheek, holding her face so he could watch each expression he drew from her whilst he rocked his cock into her.

“You like it when I fuck you like this?” He then asked. “Fuck yeah… I do.” She responded, dropping onto his shoulder with a deep groan when his actions caused her stomach to do knots. “You like it when I keep you close, hm?” He nudged her face back up, stroking down the back of her head. “I love it.” She choked.

I love you… thought Daniel. The thought kinda scaring him as he watched her with a desperate expression. He shook it to one side, well, he tried to. She’d started sucking on his finger, the wet sensation of her lips being the only thing that tugged him from his distraction. When she pulled off his finger he pulled her back into his body, a little stunned at the intrusive thought.

“You okay?” She panted, noticing he’d looked a little dazed. “Hm?” He turned to look at her lightly. “Yeah, I’m good.” He pressed a kiss to her cheek, his brows furrowing in a slight worry as he pressed his forehead against her temple. He loved her, fuck he loved her.

When she’d finished, Daniel came inside of her with a groan muffled into the crook of her neck, dropping his head there as he came down from his high, shuddering at the aftermath. They remained like that for she didn’t know how long. He had his arms wrapped firmly around her and seemed pretty content cuddling her close. She liked it, the feeling of his fingers drawing gentle patterns on his tanned skin. I love you.

Daniel thought again as he sat up looking directly back into her eyes. She’d kissed him gently, offering him a gentle smile as he took a deep breath, glancing down seeing as he was still inside of her. She attempted to move but he didn’t want to lose the contact, nor did he want the overthinking to start again. “Just-“ he held her gently down, so lightly that she could’ve moved if she wanted. “-Stay like this for a minute.” Daniel shushed her gentle moan as she sunk back down onto him, feeling him pull them onto their sides as she watched him with softened eyes.

Her eyes fluttered close as he traced the outline of her lips before moving closer and kissing them gently. They remained like that for a few more moments before she’d cleaned herself up and they remained cuddling one another close. His arm was slung over her waist, pressed up against the squeeze of her breasts, whilst the other lazily remained under her neck. It was her favourite, position, feeling so close to him.

Y/n wasn’t sure what overcame her, maybe how comfortable she felt with him, or the fact she was half asleep, but she let those words fall off her lips without thinking.

“Do you think we’ll always be a secret?” Daniels eyes shot open.

The same inner conflict he’d been battling with all week returned as he slid out of her hold sitting up slightly. “What’s wrong?” She panicked, turning over to watch him. “Nothing, just…” “Just what?” He looked freaked out, and she felt panic arise on her chest just from the look on his face. Was he not ready to hear that yet? Had she pushed it too far?

“I was just thinking about it for- for a couple days now.” Daniel rubbed his arm, staring at it as a distraction to avoid anything but those beautiful eyes of hers. Now she’s mentioned it, it made the topic much easier to discuss. She remained silent, waiting for him to continue, there was the worst anxiety building in her stomach, she didn’t like it.

“Like is telling people about what’s going on? Or-or just being more open about it.” Daniel didn’t really know where his words were headed, “yeah?” She straightened her back, finally seeing him meet her eye.

“I don’t know it would be right, y/n.” Whatever she expected him to say, it most definitely wasn’t that. Her stomach sunk and she broke all means of eye contact. Daniel felt harsh, he knew it was and couldn’t shake the regret that filled him, but it was true. How could it be okay? “Wouldn’t it?” He watched her, staring at the bedsheets looking as though she was gathering her thoughts. “How would your dad react?” He finally blurred out.

“I- he’d get used to it… are you saying you just wanna keep going on hiding everything?” The stammer in her voice made it difficult for him to look at her now, the last thing he’d wanted to do was cause her any distress, but he’d be a fool to think that wouldn’t happen. Her stomach was in knots, emotions screaming to be let out, but all she could do was sit and stare at the bed they’d just had sex in. Something about it all felt very very slimy.

“No, that’s not possible.” He slowly spoke as she felt her breathing increase. “So we’re just gonna stop then.” She jumped out of bed, retrieving some clothes off the floor, desperate to cover her modesty whilst he sat naked and pathetically in the bed.

“Well I didn’t say that-“ Daniel attempted to respond, but he realised shortly where he’d dug his grave. Had he made a mistake? It just felt so sudden, the whole conversation, he’d thought about it for all those weeks and now she was coming to the conclusion it was over between them.

“Then what do you want?” She snapped, Daniel’s attention quickly back on her. Bad idea, she had glassy eyes and there was a tension in his jaw he’d never seen before. What do you want? I want you, Daniel thought. But it wasn’t possible. “God, you’re making this so difficult, Daniel.” She turned her back, staring out of the window in an attempt to hide the tears that threatened to spill at any second. He hated the way she spoke to him, of course he was well aware he deserved it, but the sound of distress in her voice was something so unfamiliarly uncomfortable to him.

“I just don’t know how much longer I can keep going on with pretending I don’t have feelings for you.” Her back straightened at his words, she had a bad feeling this wouldn’t last, it was overly complicated, there was an age gap and they’d never once discussed what was going on between them.

“To keep that all hidden, it just feels wrong. I love you, y/n.” Daniel released the tension off his chest, her own heart bulging out of his chest. Whatever reaction he expected, it was not for her to burst into tears.

“You can’t tell me that after saying you want to end it!”

“I don’t want to end it though, not if things were easier.” He hurried to pull his clothes on, sensing she wouldn’t want him around for much longer. He felt like a major douche, and he was.

“But they aren’t.” She swiped at her eyes, turning away from him. “Don’t-dont come back and sleep with me just to tell me all this.” She let out a painful sigh as Daniel felt her words punch directly into his gut. “I’m sorry, fuck, I didn’t think it all through.” He pinched the top of his nose, feeling the urge to cry himself. Daniel wasn’t a crier, but there was something about knowing he’d hurt her that really induced tears.

“Just go, Daniel, it could’ve been easier.” She wiped at her eyes, attempting to slow the tears. “No, m’ sorry.” He touched her back, attempting to console her but she stepped away. “No, I want you to leave.” She was humiliated, and how couldn’t she have been?! “Please, Daniel.” She whispered, the two of them standing face to face.

“Y/n, I love you-“ he sighed out, but her face palm indicated she was done with the conversation.

“That doesn’t make anything easier, Daniel, please, please leave me alone.” She begged as he fought a mental battle with himself. “Fuck, I’m so sorry.” He began backing off. One part of him wanted to stay and just take back everything he’d said, another side knew he couldn't continue hounding her like this.

He’d broken her heart, and only when he left his room could she fully break down. Daniel heard it from outside the room, it was a sound he never ever wanted to hear, it made him sick to his stomach, especially knowing he was the cause of that.

Everything had happened so quick, she felt more upset over this than she ever did going through a break up of 2 whole years. Daniel didn’t know if he’d made the right or wrong decision, but it currently felt like the worst decision he’d ever made. Was there even any coming back from this?

————————————————————————

@mccall-muffin @benbarneslut @dinodumbass @allabouthappiness @ricciardhoe-3

[gwenyn28]

The "real" reasons why these actresses left 9-1-1

Because it is a common accusation Buddie fans have to deal with I wanted to talk about the reasons why the female love interests for Buck and Eddie left the show.

I already talked about it on twitter but due to a limited space I couldn't post links and go deeper into the stories. Therefore I will talk about this a bit more on here.

I will admit that there might have been some fans out there who were really mean and acted weird/rude towards these women. But still... there are real reasons for leaving the show, not "the Buddie fans bullied them and they couldn't handle it anymore so they left".

Connie Britton (Abigail Clark)

When 9-1-1 started in early 2018 Connie Britton was part of the main cast. She was casted as the dispatcher "Abigail Clark" so that the viewer could have not only the firefighter's view but also the dispatcher's. After an incident at a rollercoaster where Buck lost a person Abby looked up his number to ask if he was okay. They started to talk and soon after got into a relationship.

To begin with, her contract was just for one season and she left when her contract was up. Ryan Murphy said in an interview that they were renogotiating her deal because she loved the cast and wanted to come back for a couple of episodes (what we later got with the train wreck in the season 3 finale). But just as a guest star, not as a main cast again. In the meantime, for that dispatch connection, Jennifer Love Hewitt as Maddie Buckley (now Han) was cast.

It was also the plan NOT to bring her back in season 2 so that Buck could grow on his own and that this growth won't be connected with Abby anymore. After all, they just had a brief relationship and she left him at the airport and ghosted him afterwards.

(Source)

So, all in all, she was just supposed to be there for one season only. She didn't want to have a longer contract because she prefers to work just for one season of any tv show. And because she and Ryan Murphy are good friends, he agreed on this, wanting her appearance on his new show in 2018 to help him get the series off the ground.

(Source)

Tiffany Dupont (Ali Martin)

Buck and Ali met in season 2 during an earthquake where she was rescued by him and Eddie. Later on they met again and started to date. When Buck was crushed by a ladder truck and severely injured she broke up with him afterwards in the hospital. She told him that she couldn't live with him being in danger and that he wanted to continue with this risky job after his leg would be better again.

Tim stated in an interview 2019 that he loved Ali but she wasn't his first choice. Because she had chemistry with Buck and Eddie he decided to bring her back for Buck. Their relationship would have to go through the "make it or break it" because she knew that Buck's job was hard and dangerous and Ali wasn't a first responder. So, it had to be decided if she could live with that or not. In the end Tim wanted to keep her as an option for the next season as he reintroduced her but the relationship didn't make it.

(Source)

Megan West (Taylor Kelly)

Megan West was already one of Buck's former hook-ups who was introduced in an earlier season but came back in season 4 and 5 to play Buck's love interest. The possibility to give her a bigger role was there due to Jennifer Love Hewitt being on maternity leave. Therefore her character could get some screen time and she got a whole backstory.

Kristen Reidel, showrunner at that time, stated in an interview the inevitability of the couple's separation because of the people they were. Their characters were the complete opposites and even though sometimes opposites attract this didn't happen with Buck and Taylor. The break-up was the only logical conclusion.

Since Taylor's story arc came to an end with this break-up and the narrative of the show didn't demand another independant character, Megan West left the show after her story was told.

(Source)

Annelise Cepero (Natalia Dollenmeyer)

At the end of season 6 Buck met Natalia, a death doula, and started to date her. It seemed as if they had a connection (a weird one, but still a connection) and so she was Buck's girlfriend at the time season 6 ended.

In an interview mid-March Tim Minear said that he wasn't really interested in going down the road with Natalia when he took over again from Kristen Reidel as previous showrunner for season 5 and 6. He decided that it was time for Buck to stop talking about death, it was boring. He wanted Buck to live some more and to pursue joy. Buck should finally find happiness.

It seems like it was not just a creative decision. Not only storywise Tim decided to break up Buck and Natalia over hiatus. Annelise is based in New York. After the end of season 6 there was the writer's strike happening and season 7 was postponed. During that prolonged hiatus she got a contract on Broadway for "Hotel Happy" that premiered in February 2024. Therefore she couldn't join 9-1-1 again.

And since Tim was also fine with her not coming back storywise... it was mutual for her not to return.

Gabrielle Walsh (Ana Flores)

Gabrielle Walsh was a guest star and played Ana Flores, Eddie's love interest. When they first met when she was Chris' teacher, they really didn't get along. But later on, in the "Jinx" episode, Eddie asked her out and they started dating.

In an insta video (uploaded on youtube) she stated that she liked being on the show and that she loved her role, praising all the cast members. She admitted that she was sad to go but in the end everybody deserved to be with who they really loved. Some people interpreted this as a comment towards Buddie because directly afterwards she also talked about the Buddie fans and that there are no hard feelings concerning them, that she loved them.

Edy Ganem (Marisol)

Edy Ganem played Marisol and was brought in last-minute. She was kind of a hardware store fling for Eddie in the season 6 finale. Back then nobody knew if 9-1-1 would be renewed (or taken over by abc) so Kristen Reidel wanted to give every character a partner and love interest in some kind of closure if the show had ended back then. Marisol who was introduced earlier on on a call seemed to be a fit for Eddie in Kristen's eyes.

Coming to season 7 she was not planned to come back at first because Eddie was supposed to start dating Tommy Kinard. But then, as already stated above, Annelise Cepero wasn't able to come back as Natalia. This would have left Buck without a storyline. So Tim decided to switch from Tommy dating Eddie to Tommy dating Buck. Edy Ganem was free and could come back as Marisol for season 7 to play Eddie's love interest because Tim Minear didn't want both Buck and Eddie without a partner.

In an interview in April 2024 he stated that he had no clue about Marisol and her character. (She doesn't even have a last name.) He didn't want to give her screentime to explore the character and went with what he had. Or better, what Kristen gave him - the nun storyline. The idea was amusing to him and he thought it would help to learn more about Eddie.

In the end Marisol didn't stick around. She didn't even get a proper on screen break-up, just vanished after the end of the Vertigo storyline for Eddie.

It might have to do with the actress behind the character. She showed her true self more than once, posting trans- and homophobic things on social media and kind of victimized herself. Therefore it was a win-win to let her go after season 7, story- and personwise.

In conclusion: I read it very often that people say that the actresses left just because they were harassed by Buddie fans. Like I said in the beginning, there might have been some fans that have acted that way.

But the reasons I listed above where the cause for them to leave or not to return to the show - other obligations, wrapped storylines etc. And not just because "Buddie fans were mean to them".

[syddsatyrn]

Chapter 1 ⛤ Chapter 2 ⛤ Chapter 3 ⛤ Chapter 4 ⛤ Chapter 5 Masterlist

⛤Pairing: - Eddie Munson x FemReader

⛤Warnings: Swearing, drinking / smoking, fluff, friends to lovers. This is probably gonna end in smut.

⛤Words: 1.4k

⛤Song: "Photograph" By Def Leppard

⛤Summary: Moving away from Hawkins was the biggest mistake of your life. You left your best friends and forgot to stay in touch. Years later, you decide to hit up your good friend Steve. Its time to make a plan and make amends. The one thing you didn't expect was feelings to resurface when you saw your old highschool crush.

⛤Notes: This series is 18+ Minors scram. Special thanks to @hellfiremunsonn, I am a wreck without her, lol. This chapter is a little short. We are doing a slow burn, ladies , gentleman and nonbinary friends. Next Chapter will have Eddie in it I promise! Please check out Chapter one before you start this one. Thank you!

⛤Chapter 2: Pulling Strings You walk into work early and meet up with your manager. You explain that you need a week off to visit family in Hawkins. They calculate your vacation time and approve it, it's official! In two weeks you're going back to your childhood hometown. You asked a couple of coworkers to help cover your shift and got lucky, they both agreed they could use the extra hours. It was the longest two weeks that you've ever experienced. You passed the time with some shopping for your trip. You made sure to get all the essentials, and a couple of new cute outfits to bring too. You visited your mom and told her all about your plans, she's excited for you! She even sent you off with a little extra money, just in case.

Everything appears to be falling into place. The anticipation is killing you. But you start to find yourself thinking about Eddie quite often. You thought about his dark brown eyes, and how shockingly cute he was when he smiled. Back when things got difficult with your family, Eddie was always down for some late-night talks, listening to you vent for hours sometimes.

The night before you left, you spent time packing, calling Steve, and confirming some minor details. You took a shower before bed and watched some late night TV. When you finally decide to turn in, you crawl under the comforter and try your best to get some rest. Even if you still feel a huge pit in your stomach.

—--------------

You're beginning to think you should have packed lighter as you hauled your bags down to the car. You load everything into the trunk and settle into the driver's seat. You take a deep breath and start the car, the engine roars and you hit the gas. There's no next time, it's now or never. Time to take a leap of faith and do your best to be a better friend. You might not get another chance. The sun shines through your windshield as you turn the bend, the fresh Indiana air is crisp and clean. As you see the “Welcome to Hawkins” sign, your body starts to tense up. You try to recall the directions Steve gave you in the correct order. You turned onto main street and kept on until you saw the blue apartments named “Hawkin’s Heights”. You pulled into the parking lot and backed into a parking space carefully and cut the engine. 

It took you what felt like forever to get out of the car. But after a few deep breaths and some time to mentally hype yourself up, you are ready. You walk upstairs and follow the numbers until you find apartment 106. You knock on the door and it instantly opens.

“Y/N! I’m so glad you made it!” Steve looks completely thrilled to see you. He scoops you up into a hug and pulls you inside the apartment, shutting the door behind you.

“Hi Stevie” You laughed “It’s so nice to see you!” Steve finally lets go and you recognize the other familiar face in the room. It was none other than Dustin Henderson.

“Oh my god, Dustin?! You’re like…all grown up!” You can't believe how mature he looks now. You give him a massive hug, he's taller than you now. Time sure does fly, kids sure do grow up fast. The boys head downstairs to help you lug your bags inside, thank goodness you didn't have to do that alone.

Once you get inside you notice the boys are taking your stuff down the hall, and you follow them. Once you walk through the threshold you immediately know whose room this is.

“You’ll be staying in Eddie's room. He comes back from tour in two days so you’ll see him then. I’m sure he won’t mind at all.” Steve explains so casually like it's no big deal.

“Oh god, I couldn’t just take his room. I would feel so bad. What if I take the couch?” You ask with a nervous laugh.

“Can’t, Dustin is on the couch. His mom went on this singles cruise. Even now I’m still somehow babysitting.” Steve laughs and Dustin scoffs at him. Your face turns a little red at the thought of sleeping in your high school crush’s bed.

“Don't listen to him, Y/N, my mom is just paranoid.” Dustin retorts as he follows Steve to the kitchen.

They both leave you to order some pizza and give you time to settle in. The room is truthfully very clean, there are Metal posters all over the walls, along with flyers from shows he’s played. He has some Christmas lights hanging for some ambiance. You take a seat on his queen-sized bed, it feels really comfy. The back comforter and black pillow cases were so him. There are guitars hanging on the wall, a couple of guitar stands, and amps off to the side.

I guess it can't be helped. You'll have to deal with it for now, maybe you can crash at Robin’s later. You shut the door and find yourself some lounge clothes to wear, settling on a pair of shorts and a large Metallica t-shirt. After brushing out your hair and setting out some clothes for tomorrow, you decide to join the boys in the kitchen.

“We got two large pepperoni pizzas,” Dustin announces, Steve opens two beers and offers you one. You gladly take it and grin as you see the label.

“Did you buy my favorite beer on purpose?” You ask, poking fun at how much of an accommodating host Steve can be. When the pizza arrives you all settle down in the living room and watch some late-night sitcom. Steve tells you all about the lengths he's gone to get everyone to gather here.

Nancy is coming to visit with Johnathan, they are staying with her parents. Robin has no idea you were here, Steve had to come up with some ridiculous excuse for her not to show up today. Eddie called to tell him when he would be returning in a couple of days and Steve had to play it cool like nothing was going on. He told them we were throwing a get-together at the Hideout but didn't mention you in the slightest.

“Wow…Look at you pulling all the strings.” You clapped softly and Steve took a little bow. You were truly impressed with his ability to put all of this together. “Thank you, Steve. This is so cool of you.”

“It was nothin’ really. You called and I had to make it happen.” He shrugs with a half smile. You hug your friend and decide to excuse yourself. You had a long drive and it was exhausting. You walk back to Eddie’s room to turn in for the night. When you look over at the nightstand you see a pack of cigarettes, half empty. Eddie used to bum you cigs when you hung out at his trailer. You flash back to the time your Dad was drunk and acting out, arguing with your mom. You ran off to Eddie’s place and your mom almost called the cops.

You grabbed one out of the pack and used the lighter next to the ashtray. You opened up a window and placed the cigarette between your lips and lit it. The taste was like shaking hands with an old friend. It was smooth and you almost feel bad for breaking your 3 year streak but also, one won't hurt…probably. That same nostalgic feeling you felt opening those boxes came flooding back in.

We were just teenagers, there were so many signs that he was head over heels for you but you were naive, oblivious, and it hurt you a little. Neither of you had the guts to say anything to each other. A regret that made you feel shameful to say the least. You’ve wondered if he still has feelings for you or is he off having the time of his life with his groupie fangirls?

When you try to define this feeling it's next to impossible, you feel a sense of anticipation. It's like you’re eager to relive some feelings, or longing for a simpler time. You take a few drags and try to wave the smoke and your insecurities out the window. You can't wait to see Robin tomorrow. It's time to get some sleep, you have a feeling you won't be getting much for the rest of the week.

You put out your cigarette and shut the window, turn out the light, and finally crawl under the covers. You have to admit, his bed smells really good, like fresh linen and men's cologne. It made you feel especially comfortable, and it didn't take long to ease into a deep slumber. You could get used to this kind of contentment. 

[vickyyoon]

Professor hyunjin (pt-2)

A/n: This was in my drafts for so long after an anon asked for a part two 💀 I guess I get too into my requests! But anyways here's a part two!!!

Genre: fluffy smut, ( tinge bit of angst in the beginning)

Synopsis : your professor comforts you after you cry assuming he's been with someone else.

Pt-1 <- here

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

Regular attendance to his extra classes, you were obsessed with him and he was obsessed with you, gosh you font think you could find someone else. You had to get married to that man at this point, I mean if he could fuck you dumb once a night, he could definitely keeping fucking you till you die, this man has stamina and he's never denying to wreck you even if he's tired and exhausted.

He is just as whipped for you as much as you were.

But recently you've been noticing him with anither female student, complimenting and flirting even in the halls, your blood started to boil, what now? Was this chick his second extra class student? You were burning each day.

You got so mad that you stopped attending his extra lessons and he had to call your mom. You were furious, you didn't want to talk to him now. You thought you two had a thing, and he was really into you, that you were his only one at the moment.

The way he touches her shoulder, sometimes hugging her intently, the way his tucks her hair behind her ear. You couldn't help but fume in jealousy.

.

You tried to look patient and unfazed but behind that exterior only fire burned inside, you couldn't stop thinking about it, was he really doing this? Was he really fucking her too?

One weekend he finally payed you a visit at your dormatory, you opened the door, you looked tired and drained from stress.

" Why haven't you been answering my calls?" he asked politely and genuinely but you only gave him an annoyed look.

You were about o shut the door when he blocked it, the more you pushed the more you fell back, it was easy for him to block such an attack after all he's much bigger than you.

" just answer me. Did something happen? Did I do something wrong? Did you get pregnant?" he was rambling the worst thoughts right now.

" did you do something wrong? You're flirting with other girls while you fuck me every night? What now? Is she your new student? Does she feel much better than me? Does her walls feel better -" he shut you up with a kiss.

" Baby please what are you saying? Is this what you really think of me? Do you really think I would do that?" he asked you with a dissapointed face.

" of course you would! There's so many pretty girls lining up to get in your pants, and you only play with pretty bitches like them, I probably meant nothing!" you were tearing up as he hugged you tight.

" please calm down, you mean alot to me. You just don't see it."

After you fit rage, you head rested on his chest as he rocked you side to side, your hand gripped onto the hem of his shirt, the shirt you gifted him for passing the mid terms.

" you want me to make you feel better?" he whispered kissing your head. And you slowly nodded.

He pulled out of the hug and wiped your tears with his thumb kissing your stained face.

.

He slowly undressed you, hugging you while u clipping your bra, taking in the scent of your body spray and shampoo that drives him crazy. He was very in love with you but he never showed you that.

It shows indirectly by the way you would've completely failed those exams but he still tried to sum up your score to a bare pass so you wouldn't fail or like the time you forgot to bring your wallet and he paid for what ever you asked for.

You just couldn't see it, and you'll never get it too because you're not him, he might love you more than you love him but that's debateable.

His hand trailed down your side and he picked you up kissing you deeply, he lead you to your bed and slowly pulled your pants off, every time he tasted you, he swore he could never find the taste enough, it tasted so good he just couldn't describe, it was like his favorite dish he claimed.

Licking you and tasting you while staring at you the whole time. Your thighs locked his head in place as he gripped them, he tasted you till he couldn't breathe, his fingers pumping in and out and curling right there and you stained his face. He put his neck right against your pussy and hummed, sending the biggest vibrations against your core and had you squirming.

He put you to subspace and watched your post orgasm phase while resting his head on your thigh, admiring from down there.

.

After gaining back your consciousness he unbuckled his belt and pushed his clothes aside hovering on top of you, he likes to see your face when he fucks you, to him it's the most beautiful thing in the world, it's feels more intimate and romantic, he also likes to paint your face everywhere and send you pictures of them. On clay vases, canvases and even his walls . He likes the way your body jolts each thrust and your dazed off high face.

He stared at your face just taking in how you look.

" gosh you're such a beauty, so pretty." he whispered before kissing you on your forehead. This was so pure and platonic, it felt like a soft real fluttering love feeling.

You wrapped your arms around his neck before pulling him into another deep slow kiss filled with lust and passion.

He slowly entered inside softly holding your waist while pushing in, his face turning red every time he does this, no matter how many times he's entered you, it just feels so new and too good.

" Don't look at me like that" you grinned at him, it wasn't your fault for being so tight like a virgin every time he fucks you. Softly grunting and moaning every time he pushes further in, it was just so big and it hurt you too but the pain was so sweet and promising.

You'd rather tear those walls with his mister of a dick than mope around feeling empty, he was hugging you praising you for taking it so well.

" you're such a good girl, so pretty, no nice, so soft, so cute, so unworldly gosh you deserve everything."

His praises made you arch your back, truly whenever he fucked you, it didn't really always seem like he was fucking you, if felt like he really loved you and was making love to you.

You wanted to enjoy this bliss day and night even if you were sore from each round, you just cannot think about not having that dick inside you or him not loving you. The truth was he could never love anyone else and you too could not live without him. You often think about how you're still alive not having him inside you or around you.

The pace was slow but this was soft and passionate sex, it looked like he couldn't risk hurting you but still if you were anyone else he would take down all the restraints he had on you and probably rip your pussy.

" you're my princess, no one's better than my princess, I only love my princess." he kissed your forehead.

" if there's something I'll never do, that would be thinking of someone else, or being with anyone else. I hope you love me as much as I love you." he whispered in twining his fingers into yours.

He thrusted a bit faster now, losing self control over your lewd moans, his mouth latched into yours to muffled the sounds and to devour those sinful lustful noises leaving your mouth.

His thumb rapidly rubbing your clit to stimulate you, your walls were closing in on him too tight, he might not last longer especially before you.

" gosh why do you feel so good and tight, l-loosen up baby." his thoughts were trembling and his hips were faltering, his mind was going fuzzy and he was babbling things.

" won't you let me fill that pretty cunt of yours and make it mine?"

" b-but it's already yours shit, I-I'm already yours."

And there you two were moaning and crashing on your highs, your sheets were soaked in sweat and cum, you held him down, hugging him while he was still in you.

" stay like this for a while, please." and he kissed your shoulder.

.

After pulling out carefully, hyunjin cleaned up everything because he knew you were sore and tired at this point , especially after crying.

He grabbed a wet towel and wiped you off, kissing you in the forehead. You got back up and went to the bathroom when you realize that your newest underwear was missing. You bought it just a week ago.

You peeped out the door to see it in his little bag, you smirked to yourself, this man will never get over his habits. What was he even gonna do with these?

.

He left when the entire hall was empty and no one saw or heard a thing.

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

[acourtofbooksandshadows]

Not So Routine - Chapter 4

Summary: You finally tell your best friend about the mating bonds. Then as night falls you get ready with Mor for an eventful night.

Pairing: Eventual!Nessian x Afab!Reader Mor x Afab!Reader

Warnings: Cussing, insecurities, anxiety, scars, trouble conceiving, adoption.

Word count: 1221

Bookshelf Series Bookshelf

After many questions from your best friend you finally told her some of what had happened the day before. You told her about finding your mates. You told her about going to Ritas. Then you told her about how Mor had invited you over for dinner that night. She knew that you and Mor were friends. Even though she fully supported your relationship preferences, you hadn’t told her about Mor. That was something that would stay with you until Mor deemed it okay to tell. 

“Holy fuck. You’re gonna be having dinner with the High Lord and the High Lady. Not only them but their court as well.” She paused for just a moment before continuing on in a hushed whisper. You gave her a confused look at the random outburst. 

“You are fucking mated to two members of their court.” She blinked slowly and you just stared at her. Your palms were starting to sweat and you looked like a complete nervous wreck. Which was completely valid because that’s exactly how you felt. Because how were with only the ability to winnow and make exceptional undergarments about to have dinner with the court of the Night Court. But you also had to trust that the Mother knew what she was doing. 

“Knock it off. You’re starting to freak me out.” You swatted at her arm, trying to get her to drop the subject. But she waved you off before continuing. 

“You’re going to be having dinner inside their home.” Her eyes were big as the realization dawned on her. You took a shaky breath in as the anxiety creeped into every nook and cranny inside your body. 

“You must tell me everything. I need to know what color their walls are and what kind of rugs they have.” The grip that her hand held on your arm had you nodding in reply, an eye roll following as she released you. 

“What are you going to do about her working here?” You choked on the water you just took a sip of because you hadn’t even thought of that. The offer to employ her hadn’t crossed your mind with the whirlwind of the mating bond taking place. 

“I have no fucking clue.” Your friend was rubbing your back in soothing motions as you sputtered the words out. 

“I can talk to her if you’d like? When she comes to pick up her set in a few days.” You chewed the inside of your cheek pondering her offer before shaking your head. 

“No, I'll do it. Thank you for the offer though.” You gave her a reassuring smile before helping a customer walking up the counter. When lunch rolled around you both sat at the counter and ate together. Talking about her and her husband's quest to adopt as she had been having issues conceiving for years. 

You offered to bring up the subject with the High Lord and High Lady, hoping they might have some more knowledge on how to go about it. But she had waved off that proposal and insisted you enjoy your dinner instead. She did however make sure to beg you to tell her every single detail the next day which you reluctantly agreed to do. 

As the day at the boutique came to a close your nerves started to eat away at you. How the fuck were you about to go to dinner with the inner circle of the Night Court? You were used to spending time with Mor, she always relaxed when she was with you. It was easy to forget what position she held and who she was related to when you saw her hair a mess and her clothes all wrinkled. But to go and eat dinner with them was going to be something like you’d never done before. 

You had been standing inside your room, clothes and shoes strewn everywhere debating on what to wear when Mor arrived at your apartment with three boxes in hand. She was persistent in wanting to get you ready and you allowed her to do as she pleased. There was little use in fighting with her when she was so determined. 

The largest box contained a beautiful open back dress with a single strap at the very top connecting the thick arms of it. The front was a deep v, leaving very little to the imagination, which at this point seemed to be exactly what the blonde female wanted. It cinched at the waist before coming down in two layers, the bottom one a dark black and the layer on top being one that was a beautiful sheer red. You were surprised at the choice as she normally preferred to be the only one adorning red. She could tell you were hesitant to wear the dress. With the way your scars on your back would be on display. 

“It’s alright gorgeous, we all bear scars. They will not judge you and if they do they will have to deal with me. You have nothing to fret over I promise.” With her words two twin stars adorned the skin between the bottom of your pinky finger and the top of your wrist. You believed her, bargain tattoo or not, you knew they had all been through so much. So you let her fix up your hair before working on your makeup. She kept everything simple but nice enough for a dinner with such powerful Fae. 

The second box contained jewelry that matched the dress with its mix of black and red. She placed the necklace on your neck as you placed the earrings and bracelets in their respective places. She was then slipping out a pair of black closed toe heels that were a bit taller than what you usually wore but she didn't seem to care as you protested the action. 

“Are they going to be dressed up as well?” You fingered the material of the dress nerves settling within your stomach. You felt way too overdressed for a simple dinner. But you also knew that with the blonde female's taste she wasn’t even batting an eye. 

“I specifically requested they all dress appropriately. I threatened to lock them within Hewn City if they don’t.” That shocked you as she didn’t talk about the city often. She had told you about what had happened to her there when she was younger and had been open about her dislike of the place. She got herself ready quickly after finishing with you. 

Before you knew if you were both standing at the door of the river house. You had been nervously playing with the bracelet you wore as Mor tried to calm you down. You took in her form once more. The red dress she wore was hugging her perfectly. Her red lip stain made her look radiant. But what always shook you to your core were her eyes. They looked at you with an affection you would never get used to. She valued you immensely and reminded you of that often. 

“I will be here the whole time. If it gets overwhelming we leave alright?” She smoothed her hands over the material at your hips and you gave her a thankful nod. When she pulled back she opened the door and was pulling you inside with her.

A/N: The next chapter has Nesta and Cassian in it! Thank you all for reading! As always likes, follows, reblogs and comments are appreciated!

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[crimeronan]

Oh I am having, so so many thoughts about the Hunter yeeted to the human realm AU of the princess AU (Good Lord this Au has so many AUs which is why we love it) Assuming this happens as like, a part of the year of hell and near the end of it (like, just prior to mainline aus patricide) Hunter is just going to be, a complete wreck, especially depending on what Belos tells him about why he was sent (which if it makes Luz look bad he won't believe but might nonetheless fuck with him) and one, dealing with being locked in Camila's basement.

Things would probably end up very very murder the Emperor very quickly (ie once he's satisfied he has her sufficiently 'under control' and the second Luz gets the oportunity )... so this might end up being a very short lived situation. But... Belos being the inconsiderate jerk he is used some fancy spell where if he dies it blows up idk he wouldn't want it being used after his death though that's for sure) so Luz is stuck being The Empress (assuming things go well) without her Hunter there for her. Maybe like in some other AUs she would have Amity's (maybe dragging her in on the patricide plan) but that's it... the poor baby.

Amity (depending on her situation) might be trying to help in the same way Hunter does but is failing miserably for all of the reasons whilst being slowly driven insane. I can see Luz going to Darius and Raine for help if for no other reason than that she has nobody else.

But I'm imagining, after several months of barely getting through the day... with the adults around her barely keeping her functional, with Amity having fallen into the role of "be in the room when she has nightmares and try not to panic about anything" Hunter returns with Camila (and maybe Vee depending on how things go in the human realm) in tow.

"Heyy... sorry about being in another dimension for the past few months not not successfully killing Belos on the spot so I could be with you I will consider this a personal failing for the rest of my life.... But i did just bring back a wayyy better parental figure who... by sheer coincidence, is your actual Mom."- Hunter probably

from this concept

it's been a couple days since you sent this but i'm still thinking about all of this. trying to imagine what belos tells hunter.... my main thought is it paralleling what he tells luz in TTT. "thank you so much for all your help, hunter. but i don't need you anymore. and Neither Does She"

coming off the year of hell and all of luz's secrecy, hunter would For Sure interpret this as "belos has started physically abusing luz and has no intention of stopping." to say he'd be frantic is. An Understatement. in the main timeline canon he assumes belos killed luz without any provocation... having Actual Proof that belos has cruel intentions toward her would make him. well.

Very Upset! to say the least!

i'm not sure if he'd actually end up locked in camila's basement here, though. he clearly can't GO anywhere else. and he's in a Damn State. after her initial panic, once she'd calmed down and gotten up to speed on the situation, vee would be.... perhaps not Fully understanding, but at least less afraid. like. i think she'd lock her own door and she'd carry around a weapon whenever she went downstairs for snacks, but i dunno if they'd go the full imprisonment route.

unless hunter offered. which.... now that i'm thinking about it, he Absolutely would. hunter being like i know humans hate witches and you especially have reason to hate me but if you can get me back to the isles then you can do whatever you want to me. i won't fight i Promise

meanwhile luz is frantically trying to get to the human realm because belos is so confident that there are still witch hunters there & she does Not remember enough about modern human society to dispute it. amity For Sure clocks that luz killed belos, the same way she does in the main timeline. and she ALSO has a vested interest in getting hunter back (because he is her best friend) because she needs a rival who can best her in combat. AND she's trying to keep lilith together, which means she's often in proximity to luz anyway. so there's a lot of opportunity for her to be like. luz. are you okay?? you Have to pull it together

i think raine would insert themself politically even if luz didn't ask, because she CANNOT focus on policy right now. and it is sort of important for her to focus on policy while she's trying to govern. darius meanwhile has a similar interest to amity in getting to the human realm because what do you MEAN belos tossed his kid the little shit into hostile territory and abandoned him???

man. the sheer amount of relief luz would experience when hunter comes back. Unparalleled. girls who are going to throw themselves on him and burst into tears in the middle of the throne room.....