#so i didnt freak out even more in front of my mom

[theclearblue]

I'm gonna get into a brawl with my mother one day don't be surprised when I get on the news

[dorkicon]

bitching abt my job again

tags contain frank mentions of transphobia and homophobia

[chiiyuuvv]

Minjae, schoolmates, 596

"Go, turn around. You've already helped me enough." You spin the boy, pushing him away from you. "But-"

"No buts, now go home!!" You almost shout at him, but his laughter was louder. His eyes into small crescents with the biggest smile, showing off his pretty teeth.

"You're not going to walk home by yourself."

"Minjae," you begin, sighing as you hold the bridge of your nose. "What?" He stuffs his hands into his pockets, a shrug leaving his shoulders.

You werent really close to minjae to begin with, seeing as you only saw him at lunch talking with his friends. But you learned that there was a soft side to minjae; when he helped you get a book that was too high on a bookshelf. And how he — even though he didnt have to — helped you study, spending all of his free time reviewing questions with you for the 100th time. He was doing more than enough, and you werent even friends.

"Just let me take you home, we are almost there anyway."

"But its going to be so late when you arrive home."

"So? I'll call my mom. Its too dangerous for pretty girls to walk home alone late."

He's doing it again. His flirting. Not only did he help you study but he flirted with you. Purposely staring at you until you noticed, stating that you were too pretty for him to focus. And just like last time you let out a big huff, storming away from the grinning boy.

"Wait!!" He calls after you while running to your side, wrapping his arms around yours. "You could trip." You hum, too annoyed to do anything.

But although he was flirty on the outside, he was freaking out on the inside, wondering if he was being too flirty that it would drive you away. Thats not what he wanted, he just wanted a chance to talk to you after staring at you afar, his voice always stuck in his throat if he was anywhere near you.

He was tired of being so nervous and he was tired of his friends teasing you, so he decided to make a move, refusing to back down like a chicken. And here you are now, minjae having the most fun in his life, hiding his lovesick smile anytime you glare at him.

"We're here." You stop in front of your doorstep, walking up the steps as minjae stands there. Then you start to feel guilty, like a burden for dragging him around for the past hour, even though he insisted.

"Thank you." You sigh, turning around, the latters eyes going soft. "I gotta repay you somehow."

"No." He cuts you off, waving his hands around. "You don't have too, really." But it was already too late, running down the small steps to wrap your arms around minjaes neck, pulling him into a hug.

His eyes widen, his cheeks turn red, and his arms slowly wrap around your waist, his heart almost bursting out of his chest. "I'm serious." You break the hug, your hands firm on his shoulders as his head drops down to look at you.

"Oh?"

"Mhm." You hum, your eyes darting to his eyes to cheek before grabbing his face and placing a quick kiss on his cheek. "Just wait tomorrow!!" You yell before running inside your house, minjaes face redder as his hand slowly touchs the spot where you kissed him. He giggles like a schoolgirl, pulling out his phone to tell his friends about his adventures.

I'm never washing my face again            sent

[twsthc]

octavinelle hcs and projections 🦑🦈

⚠️ warnings: self harm, restrictive eating disorders, self destructive behavior below the cut! there are wholesome hcs too i swear

last updated: nov 10, 2023

collective headcanon: jade and azul learned the common language from textbooks (which is why they talk formally), but floyd learned from listening to sailors speak.

╰ underwater merfolk communicate through clicks + other sounds

FLOYD LEECH !! 🦈🫧

🇯🇵🇧🇧🌺 UNLABLED + GENDERFLUID (he/any)

APPEARANCE HCS:

floyd is mixed with black and tan (#D9AD91- Salmon Sand in the winter)

i think he has really large freckles across his body. i hc him to be bajan because this is the species of moray i hc the tweels to be

╰ i also made a deranged twitter thread about this

floyd has a shit ton of scars and even bite marks from old "play fights"

his two rows of moray teeth manifested in his human form as extra overgrown teeth. he doesn't mind because he thinks they look cool

in merform, both he and jade have two sets of teeth and a pharyngeal jaw

RANDOM HCS:

floyd is 1 inch taller than jade and makes sure jade knows it

bites his tongue and the inside of his cheek on purpose and on accident

she has been banned from painting her nails or doing anything messy other than cooking inside of the lounge ever since The Incident.

floyd has ataxia symptoms on land and is a part-time cane user

has severe mamas boy syndrome and will freak out if he cant talk to her at the end of each week about what he accomplished (didnt bite anyone for the WHOLE day)

he thinks its so cool you can put colors in your hair and on your face above water (why i think he'd be into decora and scene)

enjoys okinawan gyaru styles and traditional hawaiian culture/fashion also

it has BPD, GAD, and separation anxiety!!!

triggering content ahead !!

has been a "delinquent" for half his life and has run away a few times

during his depressive episodes he'll forget to eat for days on end

he can also be self destructive during these episodes (self harm)

he can also get really quiet and it scares the shit out of azul (jade is used to it)

gets really (and reasonably) upset when people other than jade or azul mention his mood swings negatively because he's sensitive about it

channels his anger into cooking rather than fighting or cutting

AZUL ASHENGROTTO !! 🐙⛵

🇮🇹🇭🇹🌺 BISEXUAL INTERSEX + TRANSFEM (she/he)

APPEARANCE HCS:

AZUL IS FAT AND HAS BREAST TISSUE (my azul hc art for reference)

in my head she looks like mama morton from the chicago musical

i base azul off of the octopus hawaiiensis, thus the vitiligo

he has longer front teeth and sharper teeth, resembling an octopus beak

rectangular pupils

has splatoon hair 🔥

RANDOM HCS:

i am a drag queen azul believer. one of his dreams is to preform in the lounge

extremely double jointed/a contortionist because. octopus.

doesnt make food in the lounge anymore because its so spicy and ethnic it started scaring the pomefiore customers </3 its not her fault shes haitian...

has severe claudication/phantom limb pains and is a part-time wheelchair user, sometimes she uses a cane. book 6 was really taxing on her legs

GAD, ASPD, and gender dysphoria

triggering content ahead !!

has a restrictive eating disorder

back at his moms restaurant, he would purge after being a taste tester

used to self harm when she was younger but is years clean now!

JADE LEECH !! 🐬🌊

🇯🇵🇧🇧🌺 ASEXUAL AROMANTIC + AGENDER (they/he)

APPEARANCE HCS:

pretty similar if not the same as floyd's

jade is a bit paler than floyd despite going outside more (theyre anemic)

i think his makeup and fashion styles interchange at breakneck speeds

monday evil emo ecopunk , tuesday dainty fairy mushroom enjoyer (still evil)

shaved eyebrows

RANDOM HCS:

similarly to floyd, they use a lot of petnames, but normal ones

╰ instead of "goldfishie," he might call riddle dear/honey

also has extra overgrown teeth in human form but hes self-conscious about it

has milder symptoms of ataxia, also a part-time cane user

really good listener and a really good talker. theyll go on hour long rants about what he found on his daily trek, a new recipe he tried, etc

has a lot of random hobbies! the main ones are swimming, stamp collecting, going on walks, and journaling/scrapbooking

owns those DIY jar terrariums as well as a few mini-aquariums

also owns multiple exotic pets/bugs! i think he owns leeche

GAD and autism. his special interests are botony and wildlife

[misterradio]

okay here are some tron 2.0 thoughts TEE HEE....... you have been Spoiler Warned for REAL!

tron fans talk abt this game with me okay 🥺

THIS GAME IS BEAUTIFUL .... MWWWWWAH!!!!!! i just love all the different environment designs, the color coding that went into the different computer systems was really cool too. my main takeaway is that the visuals Rule.

the npc designs were cool too but i kind of wish there was More variety (visually as well as voice acting)... but i really enjoy the design direction here ::-) why so many bald antagonist though? lol (AND WHY SO MANY MEN?)

In regards to gameplay i felt like it was pretty standard? i ended up using the basic disc weapon for most of the game because switching weapons takes Way too long if youre actively fighting, which is kind of a shame cuz there are so many weapon options... i did really enjoy the energy claw though 👍also the light cycle racing SUCKED and there was a graphical glitch that made it so that a bunch of visuals to my cycle were missing so i couldnt even enjoy the new design that was hyped up lol. as complicated as gameplay felt up front it definitely felt much better as it went on so it was pretty good.

game progression was very straightforward which i didnt expect..? go do this and then do that, etc. i thought it would be more open. this isnt rlly a complaint bc at least i wasnt lost or anything.

finding all the build notes was thankfully not hard but i enjoy poking around as much as i can in games already... and i liked the mechanics of searching archive boxes and being able to read emails between people ::-) YAY NOSINESS !!! despite finding all the build notes i still didnt end with the highest version i couldve...🤔 no idea how that works then...

moving on 2 story...

all the characters felt a bit flat so that was unfortunate... i wouldve liked to see some more emotions from everyone, bit more personality, etc...

i dont rlly know where jet's attachment to mercury came from, is he in love with this girl, if so why?? im thinking that since she was the first program to really reach out and help jet, that he latched on to her. but as the player i was kind of neutral on her SORRY although her design is cool

i was in disbelief that lora died and i was thinking she would just have been digitized and b in the computer somewhere? and there are allusions to her at least being superficially present in the program ma3a/ma2a etc (they have the same actress ^^__^^) but neither jet nor alan mention this which really shocks me??!!!??? thats your deceased mom or wife can u show a bit of tenderness or something..... maybe this can be cooked up more in an AU or something . idk i was really hoping she (and yori) would be around. i held on to hope for so long ✊️

OBVIOUSLY WISHING TRON WAS THERE... but omg alan being in the digital world shocked me so much i really liked that HEHE. him wearing tron's outfit was fun. i saw someone else in the tag say this, but if tron is "retired" then where is he?? INQUIRING MINDS WANNA KNOW !! he and jet werent very fazed by being digitized which surprised me buuut they also have to adapt fast given the urgency of their situation..

i felt rlly bad that thorne died SNIFFLE SNIFFLE jet and alan just watched a real guy die in front of them thats MESSED UP!! he was really cool too i enjoyed the corruption concept ::-) i was really worried the three fcon employees were gonna die too but im glad they implied that they could be repaired and manifested again.. (what is the word for un-digitized..?)

evil ma3a was really cool 👍 tbh all the antagonists are cool except im neutral on the kernel. i was confused that he was red i thought he was evil like in the original movie with the MCP's soldiers.. but i think hes just a guy who happens to be red. and also trying to kill u but just bc you (jet) are a freak of computer nature and should not be there. thats fair. i enjoyed his boss fight too.

THE FCON MONSTER WAS RLLY COOL HOW AM I NOT SEEING ANY FANART OF THEM.... ::-( i have to fix this... ALSO I WISH they had dialogue. like are they even aware of their situation. missed opportunity !!

okay thats all i can think of now.

WAIT UM I READ THE COMIC CONTINUATION(?) the ghost in the machine AS WELL and i dont have many thoughts on it bc it was really confusing BUT i did enjoy the layers of horror and unreality which i really did not expect. was also expecting the titular ghost to have more to do with lora (SIGH I REALLY WANNA SEE HER AGAIN) but it didnt but thats okay. i really liked the art of the first book specificaly.....

do any tron fans also like soma (2015) haha just wondering [TWIRLS MY HAIR

[therealpontius]

Just for tonight…

Plot: your 3yr long relationship ended abruptly, can it be saved?

Warnings: body shaming/ sickness/ cursing/ breakup/ loneliness/ no smut

This is pt1 it ended up being longer than i thought, im not sure if i like this so much but im exited to write pt2. FEEDBACK IS APPRECIATED

Wordcount: 2.4k

Part 2

"Your supposed to be my boyfriend! You never stick up for me!" Was your last words to your boyfriend, bam, 6 years ago now. You bad been sitting in aprils living room with bam, showing him the pictures you took of him on your camera when his friends all came in, his arm that was wrapped around you was whipped back to his side before his friends where in sight "yo!" They collectively shout "hey fatties here!" Dico laughed. You where bigger, not alot but definitely not as small as them. You sarcastically laughed at his joke once and ever since hes been saying it thinking it amused you, bam knew other wise though but still laughed along. Raab sat playing with a heavy football, kicking it around the place. You tried to hold bams hand but he wormed his away from you "hey chub chub catch!" Raab shouted to you, you turned round just in time for it to hit your nose full force with a crunch "fuck!" Instead of helping you they all laughed, a stream of blood coming out your nose "bam help!" "I um..." "BAM HELP ME" you screamed, the boys continued laughing. You just ran to the door, holding your nose still."Your supposed to be my boyfriend! You never stick up for me!" You shouted slamming the door shut.

Three years gone like that. No calls. No texts. Nothing...

Now you where 21, had your own small apartment in delaware. You played electric guitar at a nearby pub every weekend. Eyes still silently searching crowds for him and you hated yourself for it, he didnt even care about you so why did you still care about him?

You where headed back to west chester to visit your parents, your mom had grown really ill. The journey was three hours long and you tried to distract yourself from the overwhelming tiredness with music, it was 9am. The streets became familiar as you neared your birth town, you had missed it more than imagined.

"Mom? Dad?" You asked, opening the front door to your childhood home "sweetie!" You dad welcomed you with a warm hug, something you havent felt in too long "cmon moms in the living room" he said, leading you by your shoulder. You where met with a frail and pale looking woman, nothing like the mom you once knew. Instead of freaking out infront of her you ran to give her a hug "sweetie, dont worry. Ive had a hell of a life" she spoke softly to lighten your mood  "i know mom i just wish i could do something to help you" "well..." she pulled away from you "you could pop to the shops, your dads too lazy" she laughed, rolling her eyes "sure thing! Write a list and ill head out as soon as"

You headed to the local aldi, the one with the skate park that you took loads of pictures of bam in. You ignored any thought of him, your here for your mom.  40 minutes later you where out the shop with four bags full. Looking back at the skate park on the small walk back to the car saddened you, the memories you had there, you spent more than half of your life there. "OH SHIT" you screamed, falling on your side. You had been hit by something and you werent sure what but all you knew was that the laughs that now surrounded you where painfully familiar "oh fuck! Dude are you okay?" Oh shit.. thats bam. You kept your head on the ground hoping it would just suck you in "um yeah im fine" you sat up, seeing all the boys you once grew up with gather your groceries and bam holding his hand out to you "look we are filming a show, ill pay you in cash for any hassle is that okay?" What the fuck was he on about, he didnt even recognised you. You face flushed as he held your hand, pulling you up "hey is that fattie?" Dico says making all the boys squint at you "holy shit... chub chub..." raab gasps "yeah, you found me out" you laughed awkwardly, hands coming up in fake surrender. Bam stood, jaw open slightly "well it was good seeing you!" You said, taking you bags back, a big hand grabbed your arm "ill come with, boys heres my keys. Ill see you later" "bam..." you rolled your eyes, both of you walking toward your car "you cant just do that bam" "yes i can?"

You both get into your car and he sighs "so? Where the fuck have you been?" You can admit, he had got a bit more bratty than the last time you saw him "tone it down on the bitchyness you dont need to impress anyone here. I moved to delaware, i got a job and a house" he scoffed "delaware is shit" "how would you know bambam?" Both your faces shocked at the nickname "did you just call me bambam? You havent called me that in ages" he blushed slight "so anyways. Why did you leave me?" You rolled your eyes, why is he so quizitive? "bam look not right now okay?" "No tell me" "fine. You never stuck up for me EVER your friends would bully me all the time. Everytime they where near you would reject even going near me." A tinge of guilt shadowed his face "look im a changed person, i was eighteen then" "yeah and so was i, i would've done that to you. Bam we dated for th-" "where you going?" You where taken back by his butting in "um my moms?" "Great i havent seen her in ages… well what are you waiting for?" You reluctantly started the car GOD WHY AM I STILL DOING THINGS FOR HIM

Before the engine could even start bam was looking in the storage bits of the car "where the fuck is my h.i.m cd?!" "Its in you dipshit" you pressed the play button and the music started, bam froze in confusion "oh... you actually listen to them?" You nod silently, driving out the parking lot "sweet..." he mumbles. Something about his company wasnt unwanted, it felt natural and... happy? "I kinda missed you, y/n." He spoke, like he was embarrassed. "I missed you too bam". He got more comfortable, headbanging the way he always did making you giggle "your really looking good bam" "you too y/n, are we almost there?" "Very close, something i should probably tell you first" he raised his brow, stopping his small rave "what?" "My mums really ill, thats why im back home" "oh shit..."

You purposely get out of the car before bam, speed walking to your door "there you are! Thought u popped your clogs for a min-" "dad, someone decided to tag along me" "hey brian!" Bam greeted him with a smile, holding all your shopping bags. your dads face dropped. Your dad didnt like bam, he thought he was a 'bad example' if anything "hello brandon" he says through gritted teeth, standing aside for you both to make your way in "hey princess, long time no see!" However, your mom had always been a fan, he always flattered her "bam! Nice seeing you son!" Bam had walked into the kitchen with the bags, he knew his way around the house too well. You followed behind him, helping putting the groceries away "its weird seeing you being responsible" "me? Well you know, im just trying to make it easier for your mom" he spoke, head in the freezer putting the icecream away "it means the world to us bam thankyou" he gets up with a genuine smile you missed with your whole soul on his face "princess do you need anything in?" He shouts to your mum "all i need is a catch up from you m'love" "im great with women what can i say" he winks at you, making his way into the living room.

Four hours of bam talking about jackass, the new show he had coming up and relentless questions from your dad had passed. It had became clear that ur dad didnt really hate bam as much as he used to *KNOCK KNOCK* you stood up "ill get that!" You opened the door to ryan, novak, raab, dico and frantz looking at you like lost children "is bam here?" Novak asked "yeah hes just-" all the boys pushed by you into your living room where bam sat with a cup of tea laughing with your mom "bam we have been looking for you like crazy!" Ryan says, nodding a hello to your mom and dad "ryan please leave" you asked impatiently "its okay fattie mcfat fat we are talking to bam" dico said in his best ‘intelligent’ voice, your dad got annoyed at his comment, knowing how youve been struggling with your weight as a child "get out! Out!" He shouts, the boys running out like a flock of scared sheep. You met them out of the door "stop calling me that!" "But you think its funny?" "Ive never found it funny! Its fucking upsetting, just leave. My mums ill and shes happy around bam. Im sure you can deal without him for a little" "yeah lets go guys, sorry for the hassle" ryan apologised, all of them walking away.

You open your door to bam putting on his jacket "im so sorry about that david" "its okay brandon. We will see you later" you dad walked back to the living room and left you and bam im the hall way "im so sorry for that y/n" you shook your head "its fine call me" you slipped your number into his hands and he left with a beaming smile.

~

The next day u heard absolutely nothing from bam, your phone firm in your hand but not a single message went through. You helped your mum stay comfy, fix the heating for her, make her cups of tea and she was forever grateful "sunshine? Wheres bam?" Sunshine was a nickname bam and your mom had given you that you hadnt heard in too long "i dont know mom, he hasnt called" you tried to hide how disappointed you where "thats a shame, i found a show me mightve liked"

12am arrived and you sat in your childhood bedroom, looking at your phone as if itwould suddenly beep on. But it didnt. Instead of getting all hung up over him again you stuck on the cky disk that lay ndxt to your cd player quietly.

1am *tink* you heard a little noise but ignored it *tink* *tink* what the fuck? You looked round your room for the small noise *TINK* it sounded from your window and you opened your blinds, bam and ryan stood how they always did at the bottom, you opened your window and stuck your head out "what are you? Children?" "Yeah, we are coming up"  you watched as the two climbed up on the small roof, helping eachother out. You grabbed onto ryans clammy hand to help him and he helped bam in "cky? Awesome!" Ryan said loudly, walking to the cd player "ryan shut the fuck up my parents are home" "what are you? A child?" You smacked his head with the back of your hand. Ryan was like the cousin you would only see occasionally. Bam lay in your bed behind you, you felt like you had two toddlers twaddling around all curious "sorry y/n i cant stay for long, bam told me not to" ryan said looking back at you both, the light against his face showing his growing facial hair  "that wasnt the excuse we practiced pube face" bam groaned "whaaat? Im forgetful remember?" Ryan said sarcastically, they went on like a married couple too often.

30 minutes later, ryan was leaving out the window leaving only you and bam "this room hasnt changed at all" He spoke taking your attention away from the window where you watched ryan walk back to his house "i havent been in it for 5 years, you laughed, looking around "what happened to the camera?" "The camera? OH" you searched under your bed for the professional camera that you had gotten with your own money in the 90s, coated in dust "i retired her alittle" you laughed. Bam put his arm around you the way he always did when you would show him the pictures and held you close. The pictures loaded up as you went through them, the occasional funny ones or ones where he fell appeared.

They brought you back to that point in your life when you would run away with him, drinking in abandoned skateparks and annoying the locals. 'Outlaws' , 'misfits' they called you. You laughed in their faces, so unaware of what was to come.

"god these are so good" he laughed, eventually you came across a picture of you two kissing and skipped by it quickly "hey what was that?" Bam laughed, skipping back "wow shes gorgeous i wonder where she is now" he nudged you "SHE is? Have you saw him?" You nudged him back "y/n?" "Yes bam bam?" "Can i kiss you?" Your face flushed and you looked at him supprised, instead of answering you kissed him, his warm hand coming up to cradle your face. You didnt want to have sex with him, you didnt need to. All you wanted was to feel whole again with him, the feeling of having him near was all you wanted "i missed you" you whispered, bringing your head down onto his shoulder "why didnt you call or visit me after i left you?" He brought his arms around you "i was scared" "scared?" "I didnt want to admit that i was a shitty boyfriend" “did you even think of contacting me?” “No… im sorry. I was a naive child” “so was i” he planted a gentle kiss on your forehead “so when are you going back?” “Tomorrow..." "tomorrow ?!" He freaks out grabbing your hands and pulling away from the hug "why are you leaving me so soon" you laugh alittle "bam i have a job, a house" "friends?" Your face drops.

Maybe delaware wasnt a bad place to live in but god you where fucking lonley. Day after day after day you would wake up in a double bed alone hoping that somehow you would wake up in the warm embrace of him.

"i dont need friends" "y/n cmon, you got a good thing here in westchester" bam brought your hands up to his face as he looked deep into your eyes “bam its not that simple, i cant just give up my life” “well tonight im going to make up for being so shitty. Get your shit together we are going”

[kusundei]

keep trying to. ignore it. because i dont feel like being evil. but its like truly truly bothering me..?? its weird bcuz i was in a worse situation earlier this week which would’ve probably incited a tweak but didnt rlly happen. idk whats going on today its just iiii have been filled w a . dread. like. overwhelming dread. plagued me since maybe 4th period??? then kept evolving. had a down spiral during math and maybe that was because of . maya’s comment. because oh god forbid it caused everyone to start pestering me and? i thought everyone forgot about that??? also being reminded of the haircut tmr. hate them for two different reasons and its - 1. i always get fucked up and. - 2. tina.

tina freaks me out. shes kind. known her for so long cuz of my mom of course but ? her face ? scares me ? it truly is just that seeing her reminds me of HIM. i tend to kinda block it all out and not think ab it as anything more than a. bad thing that happened to me. to a degree it never truly feels real till i see her again. then i am reminded that no that was real and that happened to me and jt permanently fucked me up. or when i start getting that weird pain again. ive been on and off like rlly anxious ab it since??? i was told?? but its getting worse

its not rlly like its the same building. that location doesnt exjsr anymore but god forbid i pass by the building on occasion going to safeway or passing by my old apt and. oh the fear. cuz the room is glass. can see the whole interior and it scares meee sooo much^_^ i have a bad time remembering things till its right in front of me again and THEN i recall it all. oh but surely ill be fine??? its no big deal. he wont find me. wouldnt even recognize me. of course tina wouldn’t have him around or anything it truly is fine. I AM FINE AND I AM NORMAL. just still bothered because why am i. still. tweakish

i sorta know but i dont. jusr been. plagued w guilt since earlier today. i have no idea if he noticed or he saw but even the thought that maybe he did freaks me out. but i did that to myself??? if he were to lash me and condemn me and hate me then that is truly. my fault. though i know he wouldnt JUST REMINDS ME OF HOW NERVOUS I GOT EARLIER WHILE HE WAS GONE but im fine. im fine and im normal. i just still feel bad. the candy was a bad idea too PERCHANCE IT DOESNT RLLY HAVE CAFFEINE IN IT but it has caused me to fiend. and maybe its some sort of like placebo affect i have no idea i just. im normal. not enough bad things have happened to me today to truly justify how i feel right now and j think thats the bad part. not allowing myself to feel it because its not justified. its just me being evil towards myself and j cannot control it and its makinf me. odd

idk i. just. keep distracting myself and then going back. and being evil?? the evil thing didnt leave me at all though. woke up still feeling bad. i can only pray to god that i’ll be okay tomorrow and. my mom will spare me? im not repenting. i keep feeling like i should be because of the guilt but no. bad things do not need to happen because there r good things in my life. even jf ajax knows he wouldnt lash me. would he? he wouldnt. hes normal. im normal. i wont speak it into existence because it is not real and i am just sabotaging myself and making myself ill. everything. is okay. i love my boyfriend. i think he is sending me freaky things. perchance ill try to enable myself to feel better and be okay^_^ not like im not okay. im always okay. im just feeling. less. okay than usual^_^ oh god i feel so guilty its killing me

[coridallasmultipass]

Shit week tw mold

Im fucking screaming

I bought expensive ass lions mane to fry (ive only done this once before but it was so good) i bought expensive ass gluten free flour for this since i had to throw my old bags of flour out last summer (weevils attacked bc my mom isnt intolerant to regular wheat flour)

And now im like, okay, suck it up, youve got an injured back but we bought this fancy mushroom on wednesday and now we need to cook it (today is saturday, that's almost 4 days in my home fridge)

And i get everything set up, im about to spice the flour for breading and im like, wait. Check that the mushroom isnt totally gross (i could see it was drying out a little thru the carton slots, but i didnt look inside yet. Wouldve been fine if it was dry since i was frying it to dryness anyway)

And its got fucking mold. None of it is safe to eat, even if thats only a little mold.

Now i gotta put the flour back in the bag and cook an egg for lunch, since i cant put it back in the shell lmao

God why does this always happen to me, no matter what i do all my food goes bad before i can eat it. Ive been eating such low-effort foods for a while because i do not have the spoons to cook, and my back has been bad for a month (and went out on sunday).

This shit was expensive too. Mushrooms and flour were like $10 each. I just wanted something nice and fresh for a change, but apparently thats too much to ask when ur chronically physically and mentally ill

I dont even have another vegetable or anything to fry. Maybe a potato but that sounds gross to bread lmao. Ill just have an egg sandwich i guess!! Ugh.

On top of that its hard to eat fresh food when i cant close my teeth together. I liked getting watercress for sandwiches, but i cant bite it with my front teeth. I miss eating carrots with hummus but it hurts to eat hard vegetables because of the fibromyalgia around my teeth. Other vegetables take a lot of prep or have the same stringy quality i cant eat. Havent been able to bite things in half in a while because my teeth dont meet together in the front. Its already hard enough to try and eat sandwiches. This shit is just humiliating. Ughhhh.

I already have such bad anxiety about throwing food away, probably due to being forced to sit at the table and eat all my food as a kid. Im literally so fucking tempted to just cut the mold off rn. But im also scared of mold lmao. I have like aerophobia (fear of breathing in anything, not planes which is incorrect). I love mushrooms but spores freak me out. Ive forced myself to eat around mold before and it was really traumatizing and i dont like grapes anymore because of it (just anticipating the burst of moldy greenness every time i eat one bluhh)

I hate this so much lmao.

Someone needs to make a fridge that doesnt spoil food.

I need to stop buying fresh stuff. Its just a waste of money when i cant get to it in time. I really wish it didnt go bad so fast.

Hopefully when my teeth and jaw get fixed i can eat more fresh food

[deadchovsky]

Ok nvm more yapping under the cut. Tumblr is my diary and baby, I'm writing in pink glitter gel. Ignore this <3

I'm formatting this like greentext bc its funny

Big Font.

😨

Ddo you like Wilbur soot. Cuz I do

Anyways:

>be me on NYE

>one of my friends asked me to take a picture out of this end of year video thing I post on my 15 subs youtube channel every year at the end of the year.

> he says because his phone screen is visible and hes worried about what's on it. Says it might be some rp server he was on at the time the picture was taken and thinks it could he embarrassing. (This is important remember this.)

>I zoom in on the picture, it literally looks like a black screen.

> he says hes still worried about someone seeing it

>okay whatever. I try my best to remove this picture that last for like 2 seconds out of a 15 minute long video. (Sidebar, this picture was already in a different video months ago and he was fine w it then and literally has never brought up removing it from that video once.)

> I save changes to the video

> "okay I think I got it, but there might be like .5 seconds of it still, bc YouTube's editing thing sucks"

> he says its fine, because it's a 15 minute long video and the longest that clip is in there for is like. A singular second.

> 2 months later

> be me

> this mf hasnt talked to me, or basically any of my friends since new years.

> guy literally dropped out of the play despite wanting to be in it since September

>guy is literally in all 4 of my classes and hasnt attended a single one since the second day of the semester.

>I'm walking around the school bc the gender neutral bathrooms are closed, so I'm going to the least scary girls bathrooms near the front of the school.

> guy and one of my friends show up and stop me in the hallway.

> friend: "hey guy needs to talk to you."

> me: "bro I have to piss rn can it wait"

> apparently not.

> Guy: "I know you don't understand why I feel this way" (most condescending tone possible)

> turns out changes didnt save in YouTube video and the picture is still in the video for literally 0.003% of the entire runtime.

> tells me to remove it because he thinks that he was "texting his mom about his attempt at the time"

> picture was taken a month before the attempt. also he told me it was the rp server the first time I tried to remove it.

> ok whatever. I say I'll remove the picture.

> interaction is very awkward(mind you we're standing in the middle of a high school hallway while hes telling me all this) I leave and go piss

> I go back to class after pissing

>friend (who was with guy) says that was the first time guys talked to her in a few weeks.

>I show her the picture on my phone, bc I feel like I'm going crazy. The phone literally only looks turned on bc you can see a slightly outline of a white keyboard. Not to mention the photo is BLURRY.

>friend confirms that you can't see fucking shit on the phone in the picture.

>thank god because I thought I was somehow wrong for thinking you cant see shit

Also, bro saw that video that the picture was in once, freaked out bc he thought you could see his rp server in it, then tried to tell me TWO MONTHS LATER (and almost 10 months AFTER the picture was taken and posted in a different video THAT HE SAW) that he was talking to his mom about a suicide attempt in there. I didnt even remember about that bro how tf did he manage to keep that in his brain for two fucking months. Get different meds you fucking dweeb like oh my god. Clearly whatever you're on now isnt working.

[lifewiththelulus]

Clove was only staying to work at the community center between music gigs and was planning on heading out on the road again. He isn't really what you would call successful. So by the time the big event is planned (about 2 weeks). Mimi has just about figured out who he is (haven't quite figured out what does it) and by the time it clicks she runs down there only to hear from the staff he's already left

She's devastated to hear the news, even if she was wrong and it wasn't true she wanted at least to know. He never said where he was going there was no lead to follow. Normally she would walk down to the center from the store or use the bike Hazel got her but she couldn't bring her legs to move so she heads down to the wetro.

Just before she boards she hears a familiar song, made by a familiar voice,one of those kinda crappy radio pop songs that would play at the center every day. Clove loved to sing along to them poorly to lighten the mood. But now it sounded earnest. Pushing throw the small crowd she sees him, against the wall with just a suitcase, guitar and a guitar case opened to collect change.

Everything's in public and there's so much to say too much to say. So she sits down beside him and very softly sings along, hoarse and off key. His eyes shoot open not recognizing the new voice at his side only to meet her eyes with confusion. But not at all unhappy; he was pretty sure he knew why she was there. In the moment he didn't think anyone would care much if he left but he had felt weirdly compelled to help out the young lady in front of her, he felt embarrassed to admit it nor did he want to overstep any boundaries but it seemed like she needed a friend the day they met.

When the song ended he joked that she was just a little rusty. "I'm sorry I didn't tell ya I was leaving I'd be mad too. To be honest I didn't think you'd care much, you didn't have to hear my bad singing anymore at least ha". She shakes her head before grabbing her notepad from her apron. (she already knows he can't sign and this feels to heavy to be able to say).

"I know this is gonna sound crazy and maybe it is but, you told me once my last name was familiar and yeah my family owns a lotta stuff so of course you do but then I noticed other things. Your mom has my name, your roots overgrow like mine. look, you said to the guys there was a woman you regretted being with 23 years ago, well Im 22 and she's always told me I was an accident, for earths sake we even both have same rare gemstone! Im sorry if im wrong and Im just freaking you out for no reason but…" her handwritting trails off. He scans the paper hurriedly eyes widening as the implications of it all settle in his stomach. His eyes meet hers ans she painfully whispers " I think you're my dad"

He clasped a hand over his face, a lump forming in his throat it makes sense of course it makes sense how could he be so stupid. Details he'd forgotten flooded back.They were both pollinated partying that night. She broke down and lamented to him about her family, he wanted so badly to help her,he thought there was something real he told her about living with his late mother. He used to hardly be able to remember her face but he could see it now in Mimi.

He realizes shes getting more anxious waiting for a response as his mind catches up with itself. Finally he manages "Mimosa" in a loving but shaky voice. "Im sorry everything is so crazy right now but…ha. its no wonder youre so clumsy you must get it from me". that gets a small laugh from her as she looks at him hopefully. "I cant believe you've been here the whole time" he face grows worried as he repeats "I cant believe youve been here the whole time, and I never knew, why didnt she tell me about you, where is she?, is she even alive?, I…im so dizzy".

Her gem grows blue at the mention of her mother and she writes "Shes alive, but shes not my mother anymore, you asked me at the center why one of my petals grows in too short, I said it was genetic but, that was a lie". He felt sick as it dawned on him what she meant. mud streamed down his face "I could have been there,I could have protected you,but where was I?" he laughed hollowly "playing gigs at comedy clubs and wandering around with no purpose. Im so sorry".

she again shakes her head and hesitantly hugs him eyes simmilarly full of tears. He awkwardly re-adjusts his arms around her, not being used to being hugged. "I've missed everything,…my baby girl…how is it possible".

They stand for a few minutes as he just lets her cry it out against his chest. Wouldn't suddenly the train he'd been waiting for pulls up to the platform. He looks to it then back to her. She vocalizes softly "it's ok, I just wanted to know". His heart breaks at her willingness. She's already accepted letting him go and sacrificing her own happiness but to him the choice was clear. He loved music but he'd come to love her more. All at once he could see his future wasn't out there, it was right in front of him. " I'm afraid you won't be getting rid of me that easily, if uh if that's ok of course"

Her flowers blossom and her gem glows brighter than he'd ever seen. She offers him a room and job at the shop where he can still work on writing music in private. She's horrified to learn about his largely homeless hotel hopping lifestyle and promises he'll always have a home with her. "Now I know I haven't had this being a dad gig very long but I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to be taking care of you not the other way around little lady"

He starts learning some asl to talk with her better but she still writes a lot. He's absolutely furious hearing what briars done to her and the guilt kills him .

It was plume who told him anything else about briar. Mimi didn't want to tell him partly because it's still painful but she didn't want to guilt him into staying with sob stories. Plume feels bad for going behind her back like that but he practically begged him to know and Plume hoped this would help her heal

Once Clove learns about the Ashwoods he feels utterly indebted to them for taking care of her. Plume feels a little awkward and jealous that now that she has her real family back she won't really need them anymore. It leads to more frequent bouts of anger and frustration which he hates acting like

Mimi ever emotionally perceptive knows somethings bothering him and he just explodes into tears. He never wants to lie or yell at his sister so he just lets go of everything he's been holding in for those weeks. She just holds him tight and vocalizes that she loves him. It's so obvious she would would feel that way he feels dumb for ever doubting it.

Meant to come back around to this part. I think she finds out when Briar tries to Force her to come down to the house by hiring her arrangement services. After refusing Briar launches into her revealing one too many details about the circumstances of her birth. Mimi just glares holes into her until she realizes the information lines up a little too well with what she heard about clove from work.

Misty is overjoyed to meet clove and is happy to see them reunited. But if he ever hurts her little girl he's a dead man. Flint takes it really hard, believing there's no room for him anymore and that she'll choose her "real dad" over him. He knew it was silly and he should be happy but seeing them together only twists the knife

Misty tries to comfort him but she realizes he needs to hear it from Mimi. Flint doesn't have a gem,doesn't understand earth culture the way they do,it's a world he can never tap into despite his best efforts raising her. She finds him crying and doing a poor job hiding it. She takes his hands, used to the scorch marks in the dirt it leaves behind. She looks him in the eyes and only says "dad" before touching her gem to his forehead. He's a mess of lava tears apologizing for being foolish. He tells her he's so proud of her and so happy she's found her dad because he only ever wants her to be happy.

[tears-of-boredom]

i hate my mom. i just got an idea to try and fit the harness on some of our cats, to maybe get them a bit more used to it. after i got it on for hessu, i let him go to see for himself that its not scary being in a harness. i went to do laundry, and after that my mom jokingly(or so i thought) said that i should put him on a leash and take him outside. she put him on the leash. she offered me the leash. i thought "well we can at least try to go outside together". i put the leash down for a second to put on a jacket. he jumped off my bed and got scared of the leash handle hitting the round behind him. freaked out majorally, literally was searching for his safe place. mom insisted to still take him. she took the leash from me. i felt the need to follow. hessu didnt want to go outside. i tried to quietly ask her to just let hessu stay inside. he freaked out when mom took him in her arms and carried him outside. immideatly ran inside. mom said "oh the front yard was too scary, we'll try the back patio". i tried to say no, but i really didnt want to argue with her at that moment. she took him outside. he planted himself on the patio right next to the door. mom said that he doesnt want to leave. kept saying "oh its so scary but he really wants to explore too". when i took the leash from her and coaxed hessu to move, he ran inside under the couch. after i unleashed him he went to my brothers room, where he feels safe...at no point did my mom seem to consider hessu and his feelings. just because he thinks youre a safe person, doesnt mean that he's okay with being forced to go outside. oh my god does she remind me of her father. and she'd probably hate to hear that as well....i just wanted to make the cats learn to be more comfortable in a harness. why. its like she doesnt even care about the cats. or she somehow cant read cats' body language at all. i dont know which is worse, considering she is the one who adopted four of them...everyday i think "oh if i just learn to be more positive and dont make my mom a spacegoat for all my problems, ill get along with her just fine". and everyday she proves more and more that she's the reason im like this...it felt like i was partaking in animal cruelty...obviously its not that, but forcing a distressed cat into a scary space isnt exactly nice either.

[oflgtfol]

man i just had a really freaky dream

so i was at michaels of course i was. except now that i think about it it was kind of merged with my food pantry job because everyone was buying food pantry items but obv it was not a pantry since they were purchasing it, and it was my michaels store and i was very obviously at the michaels registers

im alone on register ringing someone up whos kinda taking a while and then i look up and suddenly the queue is out the whole line area so i call for backup over the phone and then two people came up for backup but they were people i do not recognize like they do not and have never worked here at my store but dream logic said they were just seasonal cashiers thats why

and then.

the computers start shaking. like the monitors tremble back and forth on all six registers. a popup on screen says

“PLAYER [register number].

(a line here that i didnt get the chance to read because i was obviously freaked out but i think i caught the word disconnected)

Please put back all winter items. (paraphrased also)”

the ground was not shaking like this was not an earthquake it was just the computers themselves and i think the lights started flickering also. and everyone started getting freaked out i literally couldnt ring anyone up because the computers had this popup and the customers couldnt see it bc it was just on the cashiers side of the computer, although now that i think about it i have no idea what was being displayed on the customer facing monitor

and it just wouldnt stop shaking it was just really loud the way they were moving and there were just so many people on line that their agitation also got really loud and then everyone looks towards the main doors and starts yelling and even screaming. theres a cop there yelling something but the customers are moving AWAY from her and in the back of my mind sorry im like. Is there a shooter. is that someone dressed as a cop who is about to just open fire on this whole crowd. sorry thats the US american in me. and then two more cops come in and then it turns into a frenzy of everyone trying to get away. we all left out the fucking emergency side door just to get away. no shots were fired so i dont know why everyone was frightened to that extent

so im like ok well im out of here i wanna leave after that im freaked the fuck out and i dont know why everyone was running away but seeing as i was furthest from the front doors im trusting crowd instinct that there was something dangerous there but then im like. my bag is in my locker all the way in the back of the store

i think this was sort of drawing from the pipe bursting incident where my mom was texting me that i cannot leave without my bag because my wallet has my life in it and i was like yeah no shit i fucking know. and that was a burst pipe it wasnt like fatal or outright dangerous. but this time as im standing out in the freezing parking lot at like, just past sunset, watching the customers streaming out of the store im like. i need my bag. i cant leave without it. i felt kinda stupid like what if this is a bad situation what if it IS an active shooter and im prioritizing my bag over my life but then i was like well i literally cannot leave without my bag like physically because my car keys are in my bag so im stranded otherwise

so i head back inside and i see other Red Vests among the crowd showing my coworkers also going back inside. and then i kinda blank on what comes next but the next thing i remember is im sitting in the backseat of my MOMS car with my parents up frront? like theyre driving me home for some reason? despite the previous importance of me needing to drive myself home??

so i catch sight of the store as my dad drives away and its this strange… lighting. it doesnt look like the lights are completely off but theres a weird glow meaning its not completely dark. and i idly wonder what happened w my closing manager like i feel bad for whatever just happened and i was wondering how she was handling it

and so im trying to explain to my mom what happened. she took the shaking to be an earthquake and i was like no. mom it was not an earthquake. i was explaining everything i just did with the shaking being only in the computers and the weird popup message every single computer got at the same time even the ones not in use, when i look up at the now dark sky and its fuckinf GLOWING its like PULSATING its FLICKERING like the sky itself is FLICKERING

and my moms like OH MY GOD WHAT IS THAT and i think my last thought was “is this the fucking rapture or something” and thats rhe last thing i remember because i woke up

i was kinda drifting in and out of sleep so i think thats why i was just like. nope im out! and woke up. but that also means this whole dream took place in only ten real life minutes because thats the gap between each of my alarms

[qualityempathshoebear]

2022, a crashing rollercoaster

Hey you,

its been a while. Ok yeah, maybe a little more than "a while". The year is over, and i think its time to reflect. But first, let me catch you up on everything thats happened since I last came on here.

Im still in Leeds, and will realistically stay here until I leave for University. Youre probably wondering what happened, why im not in Singapore. Well... my dads job didnt think he had enough experience, so what was supposed to be a delay, turned into a cancellation. So I have basically had to go to a school i wasnt supposed to be at in the first place, for a whole half-year. It was absolutly horrible and I had no friends. There were three (sometimes four) nice girls who I would sit with during snack and lunch. But it was almost always just us sitting in silence or me going on the computer in front of me, so I didnt look like an absolute fucking loser. I would go on VG and read the news every day and must have looked like such a loner to the people behind me. The girls were nice, but I didnt feel like we ever got to know eachother, I felt so fake the entire time.

And dont get me fucking started on the morning forms. I fucking hated coming in there just to sit in awkward silnce while staring ahead. And those horrible meditation sessions that the form tutor would do. I would just sit there with my hands in my lap, hoping for it to end. The girl sitting next to me was nice tho. I think she could tell I wasnt enjoying myself. I can honestly say I had no friends in that place, and that it was single-handedly the worst school experience I had ever had. And I know parts of it was my fault. I wasnt willing to make friends because everything felt so temporary. Even being in England still does. But wait, why are you talking in past tense? Im happy you asked. You see, I begged my dad to send an email to IB headquarters and ask to get the official copy of my diploma so I can apply directly into college (Englands equivalnce to highschool), without having to take their middle school exam (because fuck that!). And it luckily arrived on the last day of chistmas break... so I dropped out.

The plan now is that im going abroad to stay with my aunt until september, because I honestly just cant deal with staying in this horribly sad country. Everything about it is sad. The weather, the food, the disgustinly chlorinated water, the people, the buildings, even their fucking buildings are sad. I just cant fucking deal with it, It so similair to back home. No, its ven worse here. What was even the point of moving.

I have been so incredibly stressed because of the whole situation and its really taken a tole on me. I have had so much anxiety, to the point where I cant even sleep at night without panicking. Im constantly tired, I have lost so much weight, I have a breast infection in both my breasts (to be fair, I did have it before coming here), im depressed, and honestly, a little sui*idal.

To make matters worse, my parents have become religous freaks. And its definelty not helping that my mom has befriended some super religous woman, with the same background as us. Theyre making me do some weird post-menstruation shower ritual every fucking month (yes, theyve been tracking my period, gross!). Dont get me wrong, I dont actually end up doing them. I protest for a while and then I lie and pretend like ive done it. Around two weeks ago my dad came to my room to tell me to do the ritual, and I told him I couldnt because I was sick (and i actually was). Long story short, he didnt believe me and started yelling at me. I told him he was pressuring me into becoming religious. He freaks out and basically threatens me and pushes me (at some point even yanking my phone out of my hands, saying hes going to take it from me). All this while my mom watches and doesnt do anything besides saying my dads name and grabbing his arm every now and them. She even left at some point, but made sure to come back to gaslight and guiltrip me. I told her that if anyone touched me ever again I would call the cops immidielty. I havent really spoken to dad since. Its honestly really strained the relationship with my parents, and its making me realise that we will never have a normal relationship. In some ways I wish I could just be religous so I could save myself the anger, stress, and constant fighting with my parents. But whenever I give the idea further thought, I cringe. Even religion is ruined for me because of them. I feel that I shouldnt be religous, as revenge. The only way I could ever see myself becoming religous, is if I married a muslim man, and he helped me heal from all this fucking trauma. But I dont think I will do that. The only upside is that he wouldnt leave me, because of the stigma of divorce in muslim communities. But heck, I honestly just want to be loved. As gross and sappy as that sounds.

This year was supposed to be filled with laughs, new starts, new frienships, money, and much more. And instead I got none of it. I dont know, maybe this is what I deserve. Its safe to say that 2022 was my worst year yet. There were some highs, but mostly lows. Real fucking lows.

Im honestly just happy that I get to leave this wet-red brick country (even if its just temporarly), and hopefully in the meantime, my dad will get a job somewhere else so we can leave. If not, University is my only way out.

Now youre pretty much all cought up with whats worth to be cought up on. Before I leave, Ill share my new years resolutions and what I hope to focus on in 2023.

New years resolutions:

-Drink 2L of water a day, Gain weight, Workout once a week, Grow finger and toe nails, start daily journal, Grow hair and repair hairline, Get a new hobby, Grow eyebrows and eyelashes, Read 3 books, Solve Cains Jawbone, Clear skin, and to watch a musical live.

And in 2023 I hope to repair (as much as possible) my mental and physical health.

That would be all for now, until next time! <3

[iheartred]

the blackphone x reader

m.list

how they react to you coming out to them as queer

part one ! / part two ! / bonus (?)

cw : slight ooc !! / hurt/comfort / Reader has no gender!

a/n : GUY IGNORE MY LAST POST I WAS SO TIRED I DIDNT REALIZE I POSTED THAT 😭😭 anyways here's part two you weirdos ☆☆

Vance Hopper :

" I don't really care "

That's all you remember hearing before getting up to leave, pretty much abandoning him in the parking lot that evening

Its been a few days and it's almost like that conversation never happened, he never talked about it and you not wanting to awkwardly try to bring it up yourself you stayed quiet

He knew something was off and what it was about, he just didn't know how to bring it up either. He tried telling his mom about it without accidentally telling her that you were queer

He'd talk to his mom about how one of his friends told him something really really personal

" Well how did you respond, dear? " his mom asked

" I said that I didn't really care, it doesn't matter to me because it wouldn't change the way I feel about them "

" Well does your friend know you meant it that way? "

" oh "

He asked his mom if he could go over and apoligize, worrying that he may lose another friend of his because of his own ignorance

You continued to do your chores while you heard the doorbell ring almost a million times before finally getting to it

" I'm coming I'm coming jeez " you said to yourself in an annoyed manner

" I'm sorry, wha- " was all you could really get out before getting dragged out to the front on your lawn. By who? You don't know or really care just panicking that you may have just been getting kidnapped

" WHATS GOI- "

" shut up jeez " said a familiar voice

opening your eyes, you see a flushed and annoyed vance. You brushed yourself off and cleared your throat

" oh- uhm sorry " before you stood up straight

You looked up to see him fidgeting with his hands, you doing the same. Standing there for a good minute before you said something

" I really gotta get back to doing my chores before my parents get home to see me outside talking with you "

You continued on and said goodbye before he grabbed your wrist

" I'm sorry I said I didn't care " he said that in such a hushed tone

He was scared that if he talked any louder than that, that he'd burst even his own eardrums

" what I really meant was that it wouldn't change anything about our friendship, you'll always be my best friend.. " ofcourse he said that last part more to himself than out loud for your ears to hear

" I uhm " you stuttered, punching yourself for doing that

Clearing your throat once more before continuing on

" thanks for clearing that up, vance "

What he failed to notice was how anxious you were, you were so sure he was gonna call you later that week telling you that you were a freak and that he no longer wanted to be friends

He nodded and proceeded to walk off before shouting something

" I'll see you tomorrow you weirdo bye y/n " he said in his usual annoyed tone

Without responding you went back inside and laid down smiling that you still had your closest friend to see tomorrow

Billy Showalter :

He couldn't get himself to really say anything

The only thing that could be heard between you guys would be the big dog separating the two of you

You look at him, hoping he'd have some look of comfort instead of discomfort.

In that moment your the worst case scenario came to reality

He looked away embarrassed, you look down defeated and walk off. He tried to stop you but knew it'd only be worse if he even tried saying anything in that moment, so he let it go.

A few days had gone by and you guys haven't talked since that whole incident. All you guys did was share awkward glances when passing eachother, the casual hello when you guys had to go to your lockers. Which couldn't get any closer from how it felt standing there

He wanted to talk to you, about that conversation. If he could even really call it that

He thought about talking to you after-school, or calling you. But scared that if he did, that someone would listen in on the conversation.

You decided to take things into your own hands and just resolve the whole situation.

but before you could ring the doorbell to the boys house, the door opened

" uh " he stopped in his tracks

" oh " you responded, doing the same

You guys stood there frozen for a bit before his dog ran up to you almost pushing you down to the grass below you.

" ah I'm sorry, forgot to put him in his kennel haha " awkwardly laughing it off before you laughed too

" Hey I'm sorry for making things weird, what if we just- just forget it happened in general hm? " you said unsure of yourself even though you practiced this whole conversation like 5 times before walking there

" uhm " scared and a little bit worried because he was just about to tell you that he supported you

Immediately letting his intrusive thoughts take over, he rushed over to where you stood and hugged you really tight

" I'm sorry for making you feel like you needed to hide yourself from me " he paused before continuing on

" I jus- just didn't know how to get my word across, you know I love you so much right? " he said before seeing a light blush cover your face.

You laughed at him a bit while he anxiously tried to say it was meant to be in a friend-like-manner

" pfft I love you too you big dork " you lightly punch him in the shoulder before saying goodbye to him and his dog

☆ ☆ ☆

[xoxo-teddybear]

The Bakugou Kids - Bakugou Katsuki

(Dad)Bakugou x (Mom)f!reader

Warnings: Fluff, Crack, Cursing

Summary: Bakugou and Y/N love their son with their entire beings, but sometimes, parents need a break. Especially when those parents are responsible for creating a literal demon spawn. He is kind, well behaved, and cute of course! But he does have Bakugou blood in him. With Y/N already away on a girls trip, Bakugou has to find out how he’s going to deal with his (now) many, many kids.

A/N: You passed down your duplication quirk down to Katsuo.

BAKUGOU’S MASTERLIST

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” You asked your husband as you stood at the doorway. “Katsumi may be a calm baby but she’s still a baby. And Katsuo’s quirk just kicked in and it is mine. I would know how difficult it can be to manage.”

“Stop worrying, Babe. It’s just a duplication quirk. And he’s only 5, how powerful can it really be?”Katsuki said, wrapping his arms around you. “Just go on your little girl’s trip with Ponytail and Racoon Eyes. I can handle the brat.”

You looked at your husband with a raised brow and smile before rolling your eyes and giving him a kiss. “Alright then. I’ll see you in a few days!”

With that, you walked out of the house and into the cab to meet your friends at the resort. Katsuki chuckled before walking back into the house to find his son napping on the couch. His spiky, blonde locks were all messed up with bed head while his E/C eyes he inherited from you remained shut. Katsuki walked over to his newborn daughter and picked her up while he took a seat next to Katsuo’s sleeping form, rubbing at his soft hair until he woke up.

“Can’t be all that bad, right Katsumi?”

The baby girl merely cooed with sparkling ruby eyes that mimicked her father’s.

—

Wow. Wrong. He was so wrong! It had only been 2 days since your departure but things had already gone so wrong! When you said your quirk was difficult to manage, Katsuki thought it would be difficult for Katsuo to manage. Not him!

Katsuki should’ve known his son would’ve taken the opportunity to act out while his mother was away. He had always been your little angel while Katsuki saw him as his little gremlin. With Y/N gone, Katsuo has been pushing all kinds of limits. Limits that had Katsuki beat.

Katsuo had been fortunate enough to inherit a quirk. And not just any quirk, but your quirk. Duplication. Basically, he can create copies of himself. When you were his age, you could only create 4, max. Katsuo was different though. He had Bakugou blood flowing through him. He was advanced the second he was born. So now, Katsuki was stuck looking after Katsumi, Katsuo, and Katsuo’s 16 other copies.

“Aye! Number 15, you’re gonna break that lamp! 11 and 8! Don’t wrestle in the mud! Go take a bath! NUMBER 3 GET OFF THE KITCHEN ISLAND! KATSUMI!” The adult blond screamed, looking for his infant daughter, eventually finding her sleeping in her little rocker on the living room floor. “Oh right, you don’t talk yet.”

Katsuki sighed as he slumped down next to his daughter, and leaned his back against the couch. He looked around the room and saw the 17 Katsuo’s making a ruckus around the house. All he could do was question how the hell is 3 month old daughter could possibly sleep through all this.

Katsuki almost lost all hope for humanity until a knock was heard on his front door. Knowing exactly who was there, he quickly got up from his place on the floor and ran to the entrance. “You idiots are finally here!”

Katsuki pulled in his 3 friends, the boys of the Bakusquad, and slammed the door shut. The 3 friends all stood in shock at the sight of the house. Not that it was overly messy or anything. It’s just that there were about 16 more figures in the house that aren’t usually there.

“You gotta help me!” Katsuki said, running infront of them, shaking his best friend’s shoulders. “I love my kids! I do! I love Katsuo, I swear! BUT I DIDNT SIGN UP TO BE A FATHER OF 18 FREAKING DEVILS!”

“Okay! Okay, relax man. We’re here.” Kirishima said, patting his friend’s shoulder as he wept. “How the hell are we gonna take care of 17 little Bakugous?”

“Right? We thought 1 Kacchan was a lot. Then you brought another one into the world, who apparently brought some unannounced friends.” Kaminari joked.

“They’re demons!” Katsuki exclaimed. “This has to be some fucking Karma for the shit I did. I knew I should’ve listened to my old hag better. Now shits came back to bite me in the- HEY! PUT YOUR SISTER DOWN! SHE’S NOT A FOOTBALL!”

Katsuos number 7 and 5 placed a sleeping Katsumi back in her rocker with an annoyed pout before running off to play something else.

“Welllll, there’s nothing that 3 cool uncles can’t fix!” Sero enthusiastically said. “Hey kiddos! Who’s ready to have some fun?”

All the mini blondes stopped their movements, some freezing mid-air, and looked to the slim man. They all shouted in joy at the sight of their uncles and ran to pounce on the 3 men, including their father. From the point of view of the boys in the Bakusquad, it looked like a Bakugou stampede.

“Run, run, RUN, RUN, RUUUNN!!!!” Kaminari screamed as the boys all ran for their lives to escape the herd of Katsuos. This was going to be an interesting day.

—

Safe to say after the day had passed, the boys of the Bakusquad were completely exhausted. Sero had half his clothes torn, Kirishima’s hair fell from it’s great spikes and even lost some red hues, Katsuki’s eye bags had never been heavier, and Kaminari was just straight knocked the fuck out. They were all thrown across the couch as Katsumi rested in Katsuki’s arms.

“What do we do?” Kirishima exclaimed.

“I don’t know.” Katsuki said, looking at his scrambling son(s). “There’s just too many.”

“And we’ve already lost a soldier.” Sero said pointing to Kaminari’s sleeping form. Katsuki and Kirishima followed his gaze and bowed their heads in respect towards the defeated Kaminari.

“Well now what? Is Bakugou just supposed to live like this for the next 3 days?” Kirishima asked.

“Hell no. If I do, there’s not gonna be anymore Katsuki. I’ll just be some body without a soul because my damn gremlins sucked it outta’ me.” Katsuki said with his head dropped down.

“Well how do we get them to calm down?” Sero questioned.

“I don’t know. They’re all mini me’s. Nobody could get me to relax.” Katsuki said in defeat, but that’s when Kirishima had a lightbulb go off for him.

“Except for Y/N!” The red head said, popping up from his seat on the couch.

“Uh, if you haven’t noticed Shitty Hair, this all started because she’s away on her trip.” Katsuki said with sarcasm as he looked at his friend as if he was an idiot.

“I know that! But Y/N wasn’t the only one to tame you, Bakugou!” Kirishima said in excitement.

“So then who else?” Katsuki asked.

“You know,” Kirishima smirked. “Denki’s favorite person. Y/N and.........”

It took Katsuki a second before his eyes popped when he finally got it. “No!”

“Yes!” Kirishima said.

“No way! We’re not going to her!” Katsuki complained.

“Who?” Sero asked.

“Nobody!” Katsuki screamed.

“Oh it’s somebody alright! Somebody who was able to tame the beast in Bakugou the second he was born!” Kirishima said.

“Who?” Sero asked. Katsuki finally sighed before he gave in, realizing this was his only hope for sanity. He grabbed his phone and made a quick call before explaining to his dark-haired friend.

“The demon of all demons...”

—

The door opened to reveal a tall standing brunette and an elder feminine blonde.

“...My mother.”

—

The boys of the Bakusquad all sat lined up on the couch as Mitsuki stood at Katsuki’s end and smacked her son’s head.

“You idiots! Y/N leaves for 2 days and all hell breaks lose?!” Mitsuki screamed at the 3 young men.

“You old hag! Quit hitting me! Ima’ grown man for crying out loud!” Katsuki screamed as he rubbed his head. Masaru simply bounced the sleeping Katsumi in his arms as he watched the scene play out.

“Well if you’re such a grown man then why can’t you manage your own kids without your wife’s help?!” Mitsuki argued, leaving Katsuki silent as he grumbled. The eldest blonde sighed before continuing. “Alright listen, I’ll watch these little devils for the next few days until Y/N comes back. I’d love to spend some time with my grandbrats. Why don’t the 3 of you go take a break and-“

“THANKS! Let’s go losers!” Katsuki said dragging his friends to the exit. Mitsuki and Masaru only laughed at their son’s behavior as they began tending to the kids.

The boys of the Bakusquad all quickly walked out of the house and headed for their cars as they all walked together.

“So, where to?” Sero asked.

“We could go head up that new resort in Tokyo!” Kaminari suggested.

“Naahhh. That’s where Y/N’s having her girl’s trip. Wifey would kill me if she saw me there instead of at home with the kids.” Katsuki said with his hands in his pockets. Kirishima raised his brow at this.

“Oh? So then, maybe we should go back and-“

“You know, on second thought,” Katsuki said with wide eyes once Kirishima made the suggestion. He took his hands out of his pockets and placed them behind his friend’s backs to keep them moving. “Maybe she won’t kill me..if I’m lucky..and wish..upon a shooting star....a million times over. Hah.....yeah. TO THE RESORT!”

As they walked, Kaminari attempted to look at the house once more, prompting Katsuki to turn his friend’s head back around. “No, no, no, don’t look back, they can smell fear.”

[happys-crazy-queen22]

Nothing Like Them

Gif credit @mochminnie.

Requested by @mypridefulsoul27. I hope you enjoy it. Thanks for the request.

"Oh god, I'm dying". You sniffled as you came out of the bathroom,  you had been hauled up in the bathroom all morning throwing up.

"Baby, you okay"? Oscar stopped you in the hall and felt your head with the back of his hand. "No fever. Maybe you ate something that didnt settle with you"?

"For two weeks? Nothing is settling good with me. I can't eat or keep anything down". You scrunch your nose up when the smell hits you. "What is that horrible smell"?

"An omelet". Oscar raised his eyebrow.

"It's horrible. Oh god". You cupped your mouth and headed back into the bathroom. Heading right for the toilet.

"Oscar"? Cesar called Oscar to the kitchen. You slightly heard him yell. You wiped your mouth and tiptoed out of the bathroom and stood at the kitchen entrance.

"Um, I know this is none of my business but are you and Y/N using protection"? Cesar asked his older brother. "You know, wrapping before tapping"? Which he regretted immediately.

Oscar growled. "Go to school. Now".

"Fine. But she could be pregnant. If you arent wrapping it. Think about it". Cesar sighed, grabbing his pop tart and his book bag. He headed out the front door.

Your eyes grew wide. Pregnant? That never even crossed your mind. What the hell where you going to do, if you were?

You had to find out if pregnancy was causing you to be miserable. You made up an excuse to Oscar and headed to the store.

There were three different types of pregnancy tests and they were all starring you down.

Shaking your head you grabbed the first one and headed to the checkout. Sneakily you checked out cause Freeridge had a bug mouth and you couldnt risk Oscar finding out before you told him.

"Where did you go"? Oscar asked as you came into the house.

"Girly time". You spoke fast your mind didnt have time to rethink your answer and you bolted to the bathroom.

"Well, I guess you arent pregnant then". Oscar sighed and sat down on the couch. Still confused about what this sickness could be.

Ten minutes to go. You sat on the floor and waited. The test on the edge of the sink haunted you. Oscar has never said anything about kids. He was forced to take care of Cesar and didnt really get to be anybody but a dad. Finally Cesar was grown and he was free. This could be another set back for him.

Looking at your phone you had three minutes left. Three minutes until life changed or stayed the same.

What happens if you turned out like your mom? You were so worried about Oscar what about you? Your mom was never there, always in and out of your life. Oscar was there for you more than she was. You could count how many times she was there on one hand. You didn't want to be like her. Now you were freaking out even more inside.

Beep beep.

"Oh shit". You huffed blowing out a big puff of air as you reached up and grabbed the test.

You covered the result part with your hand. "If I'm pregnant, I vow to never be like my mother. I will always be there for my child even if Oscar doesnt want to be in its life. I will work as hard as I can to make sure it's well taken care of and doesnt have to worry about anything". You gulped and looked at the results.

Positive!

The weird thing, you felt relieved knowing. Like a weight was lifted off your shoulders. But the hard part came. Telling Spooky.

Coming out of the bathroom, Oscar was standing at the hallway entrance.

"You okay? Been in there awhile. Didnt hear no puking so what were you doing"?

"Thinking".

"About"? Oscar came over to the bathroom door and wrapped his arms around you.

"I'm pregnant, Oscar".

"I guessed that. We havent done much protecting when it came to that. How are you handling it"? Oscar rubbed your back.

"I'm scared to be honest. I'm worried how you'll take it. I'm scared shitless on how I'm going to be as a mom. Our parents weren't the greatest role models".

"I know. But I think we've done a pretty okay job raising Cesar".

"We"?

"Yeah. You've been there since he was little. You took care of him when I was in the pen. You look after both of us. So you're not like your mom. I'm nothing like my father. I stayed and raised him. I'm not going to run from you or my child. I'm here to stay. I made this little spooky jr, I'm going to take responsibility. You dont gotta worry about anything". Oscar squeezed you tight.

"How did I get so lucky to have you"? You cuddled up in his chest.

"I'm the lucky one. You're not afraid of me. Plus you let me touch your boobs". Oscar laughed. Making you roll your eyes.

"That's what got us in this situation we're in. But I wouldnt want to do it with anyone else. I love you Oscar".

"I love you too, Mi Amor". Oscar kissed your forehead. You both were worried and nervous but all parents are the first time. Now you gotta tell Cesar he's going to be an uncle.