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#so i get it even if it's frustrating. it's really heartbreaking more than anything
itsdeanwinchester · 4 months
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it's not surprising to me that some people didn't warm up to Mae, but it surprised me that people could dislike her so much. Mae's personality and actions made complete sense even if it was frustrating and hurtful. And because I understood where she was coming from, I couldn't hate her. She lied to Noa again and again even though she was feeling more and more guilty about it because she prioritized duty. She couldn't let her brief time with Noa and Raka undermine a critical mission to help the survival of humans. She chose her safety for her greater mission. (My favorite line was when she said she was taught silence for safety.) It was painful to watch, but also sad because it was obvious that she was having second thoughts, she was hesitating, she was growing attached. But her attachments mean nothing when the human race was relying on her. That weight and burden were immense. Because we follow Noa's journey and have seen what he lost, we empathize with him more. We can only imagine what Mae has gone through, but just the few hints we've gotten is enough to know she has endured much.
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paopuofhearts · 11 months
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it's almost like the only option is dividing things further black and white then just going hardcore to an extreme.
like.
i spent all day yesterday cutting off friends and blogs of people i love in my native community because of the excessive call for violence as the answer to decolonization, maintaining nuance but only for one side and saying fuck all to everything and everyone else.
but then today.
the number of jewish friends and blogs i've had to unfollow because people are doubling down on "hamas bombed a fucking hospital" when there's clear evidence that isn't true and it's propaganda to perpetuate cycles of violence?
fucking horrifying.
#like as someone from a native background and someone working to convert it's just#heartbreaking and frustrating to feel absolutely abandoned by both sides#simply because pointing out israel is built on a settler-colonial stance even if jewish people aren't settlers and colonizers#because they are indigenous to the area#gets me beat to the ground in native circles because it means i support netanyahu and gver and genocide#and i get the same fucking condescending look of 'you shouldnt talk' from liberal jewish groups that are all for saying zionism is a diseas#and yes they agree as jewish people that they are white and israel is white supremacist like#like i'm sorry the fucking whiplash of what the absolute fuck#but then pointing out that palestinians are being mass murdered and their response is clearly understandable#and israel is purposely using this shit to perpetuate genocide#all of a sudden i'm a fucking hypocrite to both sides#and my poor fucking husband is standing here like 'yes thats what you get for being clearly aware and wanting nonviolence'#how dare i not stand solely with israel#how dare i not demand only free palestine#people are just so fucking toxic and caught up in their own opinions being the only opinions and nuance being a fucking crime for condemnin#as if talking about this shit does anything! people are dying on both sides - one clearly more than the other - and what#you truly think attacking people that aren't specifically nodding along in blind support is really the thing that'll change the world#also saw a thing today that was like “being an ally means i will fight for you” like fuck that#but that's a different thing anyway#anyway i hate both my communities and feel absolutely isolated from them and wow#community just really isn't a thing unless you're ride or die without speaking up about anything huh
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vaguely-concerned · 3 months
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I understand and agree with a lot of the frustrations about the shortcomings of Inquisition as a story. but sometimes when I hear people complain about the chosen one narrative in it I do want to just be like... you know it's a deconstruction of the concept more than anything, right. the inquisitor isn't actually chosen by anything except stumbling into the wrong (right?) room at the right (wrong?) time because they like, heard a noise or whatever. or if you think they are chosen, as many do in-universe, that's something you have to take on faith, the maker-or-whoever moves in mysterious ways indeed-style. the Inquisitor isn't actually a Destined Chosen One, they're a Just Some Guy in a fancy hat, self-delusions of grandeur to taste as you'd prefer.
a running thread that goes through all of the personal quests of the companions is the concept of a comforting lie vs. an uncomfortable truth, upholding old corrupt structures vs. disrupting them, and the role of faith in navigating that. (blackwall the warden vs. thom rainier the liar and murderer. hissrad vs. the iron bull, or is that the other way around? cassandra and the seekers -- do we tell the truth about what we find, even if it means dismantling the old order of the world? and so on.) and your inquisitor IS at the same time a comforting lie (a necessary one, in dark times? the game seems to ask) and an uncomfortable truth (we are the result of random fickle chance, no protective hand is held over the universe, it's on us to make a better world because the maker sure as hell won't lift a divine finger to help anyone, should he against all odds exist). faith wielded for political power... where's the point that it crosses the line into ugliness? is it before it even begins? what's the alternative? will anyone listen to the truth, if you tell it?
interesting how you also get a mix of companion agency in this -- you have characters like dorian who ALWAYS choose one side of the comforting lie vs. uncomfortable truth dichotomy. he will always make up his own mind to go back to tevinter and try to dismantle the corruption of the old system no matter what you say, or how you try to influence him. meanwhile iron bull is on the complete opposite side of the spectrum -- so psychologically trapped and mangled, caught in an impossible spiritual catch-22, that his sense of identity is left entirely to you and your mercy. you cannot change dorian in any way that matters; you can be his friend or not, support him or not, but he is whole no matter what. you are given incredible and potentially destructive-to-him power over bull's soul. it's really cool (and heartbreaking) to think about.
this is a game about how history will eat you even while you're still alive, and shape you into whatever image it pleases to serve it, and for all your incredible power right now you are powerless in the face of the gravitational force of time -- of more than time, of History. you won't recognize yourself in what History will make of you, because you belong to it now. you don't belong to yourself anymore and you never will again. the further you were from what it needs from you to begin with, the more you will find yourself distorted in its funhouse mirror. (why hello there inquisitor ameridan, same hat!)
and to me this is so much the core of what Dragon Age is about right from the Origins days -- how and by whom history gets written, the inherent unreliable narration of it all. I hope you like stories, Inquisitor. You are one now.
I do think it's probably still the weakest of the games narratively, and it's hampered by its structure and bloated systems. but I also find it disingenous to say that there's nothing deeper or actually interesting going on with it, thematically. if you're willing to engage with it there is Some Real Shit going on under the high fantasy-tinted surface.
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Yandere bruce wayne with neglected!daughter reader
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Seen a bunch of neglected reader fics recently but I haven't seen one of a Reader who slowly starts to take advantage of the situation and uses batfam for their money and connections so here's this! This only focuses on Bruce for now but if anyone is interested I'd be willing to do some for the other batfam members + hcs for when/if they snap and kidnap the reader. 
Was suppoused to headcanons but ended up more as long rambles than anything lol mainly set up for later posts detailing the situation
Pt1 it got too long, word count ; 2461
Unedited
___
Bruce is absolutely the most susceptible to this behavior, he feels the most guilt about the situation (as he should for being a neglectful father) and he is not going to lie to himself to try and save face and make himself feel better and if he does it's only for a short while before reality slaps him in the face and he has to see the truth. The truth is that there is no one to blame but himself.
When he first noticed your disappearance it had happened slowly… entirely too slow when he really took the time to think about it. You had been gone for a full year and he hadn't even noticed? Were you even old enough to be on your own like that? Something he felt ashamed that he even had to ask. When Alfred informs him that you're nineteen just this month he's shocked not only that you're an adult and that he didn't even realize your birthday had passed but that he couldn't even remember your face. He searches his memories for your Visage but all that he can recall is murky; he can't even remember the correct shade of your eyes or your hair and it startles him how long has it been since he took the time to properly look at you? 
It takes some time but eventually he remembers your face with sudden clarity, he hadn't seen it in a while and the only image he could conjure up was when he first saw you, a small helpless looking child left on his doorstep by commissioner Gordon.  your eyes held the same dull glassy look that his did the night his parents died, you had lost your mom in a similar vein he felt he could relate to at the time. he remembered seeing you and feeling sad for you but not in the way a father does for his child the way he felt was the same way he felt as Batman seeing victims in Gotham streets you didn't deserve this life but you weren't anyone close to him. 
His chest aches and he remembers the way you'd clung to him your first week in the manor and then the way you wilted when he shut that down, it wasn't like he was trying to hurt you but he couldn't have you following him around everywhere especially not when gothams crime was getting out of hand even with the other members picking up his slack. So he reprimanded you, way too harshly now that he looks back on it he knows he only meant to keep you from discovering his secret but he could have worded it better instead he made it sound like you were a burden. Maybe you were to him at the time he thinks and is disgusted with himself for even letting the thought cross his head. 
He reads your diary page after page until he reads through the whole thing. The first few pages are hopeful but solemn detailing how much you missed your mother but you're glad that you have a whole new family and you hope that they will like you, it's heartbreaking to read that kind of childish hope turn into sadness and then hate. You detailed how no one would make time for you that you'd tried everything to get their attention but you'd get blown off by each one it turns into rants about you asking what was wrong with you and why no one ever spent any time with you the writing was scribbled on so he knows you did it in a hurry just to vent out your frustration. The part that hurt most were the pages about him, you had nothing good to say about him in fact in one of the pages you had written that you didn't have much to say about him at all that you hardly knew him and barely saw him once a month and couldn't even call him your father. 
Surely that couldn't be true right? He's not the best father figure by far but he always tried to make time for dick, Tim, Jason, Steph, Damian and Cass ... .surely he did for you. 
He tries to find memories of him being a good father or at least trying to be any kind of father figure to you at all but he can't he can only see the times he rejected your pleas to spend time with you for things he deemed more important than you he sees it clearly each time he rejected you how you got sadder and sadder how you seemed to wilt at each and every rejection until you stopped asking. 
he tries to tell himself that he did it for your protection that he just didn't want to get you involved in the crime fighting scene and since gothams streets were never without crime he spent an exorbitant amount of his time as Batman down in the batcave or out fighting crime with his other children and that's why he couldn't spend time with you. And that's why he seemingly had so many memories with them in the recent years; hell even in the recent weeks he has more memories with dick and the others than he ever had made with you. he tries to use it as an excuse to mask the truth; that you didn't matter in the grand scheme of his life, at least not then but he's going to do everything to make this right.
You'll be surprised to suddenly get a ton of texts from an unknown number even more so when you find out it's from bruce. Suddenly he's asking you how you've been, how was the move, are you in college right now, what major did you take? Obviously you're taken aback when the man who acted like you didn't exist suddenly wants to know everything about you. You would think he'd needed something but you know better than that what could he possibly need with you now? You don't have any money and he wouldn't need that anyways. Maybe he's dying and needs a kidney or something…whatever you don't care that man can rot. 
You leave his messages on read of course, because you don't owe him a response and well maybe to be a bit petty and give him a taste of his own medicine. You don't know how bitter the taste is in Bruce's mouth, he knows you've seen them so why won't you respond? Bruce usually isn't a multi texter but he'll send more and more trying to get any kind of response out of you, he's constantly checking his phone hoping to see three little dots appear and he's noticeably slightly more angsty when out patrolling with the others. 
The texts were annoying but you could mute his notifications and after the first few weeks you basically forgot about the texts going about your normal life until he started calling. It seemed like he was always calling Day in day out, you blocked his number because of how annoying it was but he always just gets a new one leaving the same text “ hey your name its dad” and then the calling would resume. 
One day you pick up and Bruce sounds so relieved when he says your name into the receiver you figure he might really need that kidney if he sounds this excited to see you.
When you answer back he knows you aren't excited in fact you sound completely disinterested in him which takes him by surprise, isn't this what you wanted? What you cried for in your diary begging God that your father would notice you. You're older now so maybe you just aren't looking for that kind of attention anymore, the thought haunts him the idea that he could never truly make it up to you still he pushes through his voice sounding nervous as he starts to tentatively ask about your day. You cut him off with a scoff after some terse conversation telling him to just get to the point already and stop wasting your time. 
The silence is deafening and you almost hang up before he croaks out a response “sorry name, I just wanted to know what you were up to I know we uh.. haven't talked in awhile I just wanted to hear from you and know that everything was alright”  could this really be your father? He sounds so pathetic to you at that very moment, nothing like the confident man you saw on television often nor the man you saw taking care of everyone but you. 
And no nothing was alright you were working a job you hated in some shitty little apartment in Gotham that you had to fear if it would get broken into or not because the damn landlord wouldn't change the faulty locks a rage takes you and you just let it all fall out cursing him for your shitty life and the shitty apartment and for being a shitty father letting all that rage out until you're left heaving.  its silent after your outburst you think he might have hung up but after a moment he offers to pay for a new place and offers to pay your current rent until you can break the lease and that he will take care of you and not to worry about anything financial telling you to quit your job and to send him your bank so he can get things sorted out.  
At first you wanted to vehemently deny this, wanting to prove to yourself that you didn't need him or his help but something In the back of your head tells you to accept it, that if he expects anything back for it then that's his fault for assuming. So you tell him and soon there's a large sum of money in your account more than you have ever had in there. For once you can actually afford to treat yourself instead of eating shitty microwaved ramen, and so you dine out in a nice reasonably expensive restaurant with your friends and you enjoy yourself. 
A week passes in silence and then he's sending you pictures of luxury apartments telling you to pick out any one you want and that he'll get everything settled and you almost can't believe this. Would he actually pay for something so outrageously expensive? You almost doubt it but once your lease is up Bruce is at your door helping you move out any furniture you wanted to keep which was almost nothing seeing as everything was already worn out anyways. 
You didn't say much to him and he seemed to realize you were in no talking mood so he allowed you to be quiet and told you about himself instead talking about the boys and what he'd been working on recently, it feels like what he should've been for you years ago an interaction you'd have killed for when you were fourteen and it just pisses you off so you turn on the radio instead to drown out his words. You don't care how he's doing, you don't want to hear about dick or damian, you're only accepting his help because you're tired of living in that shitty apartment. The ride is otherwise silent except for the annoyingly upbeat pop music which would probably make Damian or Jason have an aneurysm if they had to listen to it. 
The goodbye is  awkward. You can tell Bruce wants to come inside and talk more but you thank him for helping you move in the furniture and shut the door. 
He buys you new furniture without you asking and sends it in by the second week you're in the apartment. You don't realize that he stalks your posts and that he saw one of you complaining about the lack of good furniture.
Life has never been better for you, you live in luxury and can go on shopping sprees literally whenever you want and Bruce sends you a random stream of cash whenever you start to get low and you're definitely not going to look a gift horse in the mouth not when you enjoy every luxury you are afforded. 
Life is good until a certain black haired prick starts inserting himself into your life and this time it isn't bruce, nope it just had to be your annoyingly bubbly, touchy, and all too friendly ‘stepbrother’ dick grayson.
___
So yeah all in all Bruce has the capability to recognize your strained relationship is all his fault and that he never should have ignored you and how selfish he was to put his duties as Batman above his duties as a father to you. He realized he didn't even try to balance the two. 
And Despite himself he ended up hurting you and neglecting you so he feels he owes it to you to make things right even if 'making things right' entails him buying you a luxury apartment or purchasing the latest phone or new car. The best part is that Bruce will not demand time from you (yet) because of his guilt.  He simply suggests that maybe you should come out with him saying that he planned a whole day for the two of you but the ball is in your court since whether or not you ever accept his invites he will continue to be your cash cow to absolve himself of his guilt. 
It's fun because now you get to watch him wilt everytime you reject his attempts at reconnecting, you get to have your petty revenge watching as a part of him dies inside each and every time you ignore the conversations he tries to start when pulling money out of the bank,  you get to watch how he seems to lose all of his luster when you leave once the cash is in your hands without so much as a thanks. Bruce isn't stupid he knows this dynamic is unhealthy and recognizes it for what it is but this is the only way he can get you to talk to him or to even look in his direction. He has his limits though eventually you will talk to him whether you want to or not 
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niningtori · 5 months
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make you cry | part three: hyuka's ending
part one | part two: beomgyu's ending
pairing: hueningkai x you, past beomgyu x you
summary: after your falling out with beomgyu, kai becomes your new best friend as you spiral out of control. his actions may not be completely platonic, though.
genre: angst, romance, smut (mdni), best friends to lovers
warnings: smut (mdni), unprotected sex, creampie, dom!hyuka, oral (f. rec), dirty talk, praise, choking (sorry), possessive!kai, just some really sweet sex if u ask me, pregnancy kink
word count: 3.9k
notes: y'all... ik i said this would come out on my bday (which is exactly 2 weeks from now hehe) but i couldn't help but post it as soon as i finished it... lord knows i'm impatient. anyway, i said this would probably never exist but since ppl were asking for it, as the biggest pushover in the world, i couldn't say no ;_; i hope you enjoy it!
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"you're not gonna die," kai says softly. "it's a shitty circumstance, but you're just making it harder on yourself."
you hum noncommittally while downing another searing shot of vodka. kai watches in horror as you don't even think to chase it, too much of a hassle, you said.
"look, i know how you're feeling, trust me. i just think that torturing yourself is the worst thing you can do right now. whatever happened to self care in the face of heartbreak?" he pleads, and it's like he's talking to a wall. you had been staring listlessly at the same spot for what had to have been at least an hour — no tears, no nothing. just a blank stare and an insatiable need for the next sip.
"yeah, i know. i just wish things were different." you were miserable being just friends with beomgyu before, but that pales in comparison to how used you feel now that you’ve slept with him. 
"i know, baby. i know." at this point, he kind of just wishes you would cry. the awful look on your face seems significantly worse than if you'd just burst into tears.
beomgyu is your best friend, sure, but as you slowly descended into a pit of unrequited love for him, kai had understood like no one else after a particularly nasty breakup with his serial cheating ex. you two found some sort of secret camaraderie in the feeling of loneliness, something beomgyu would never understand, given how easily everything tended to work out for him. except for right now, you guess.
"alright, i think i'm done here," you slur and shakily stand as the vodka seems to be doing its job. kai scowls in frustration, wishing he could do more for you, but knowing he can't.
-
kai refuses to let you go home alone, so he hitches a taxi for you two. in the backseat of the car, you lean your head on the window and close your eyes, but all you see is the repeating image of beomgyu with a self-satisfied smirk on his face as he shows you the girl who he will probably end up fucking. you feel mentally sick knowing those eyes will never light up that way for you. you feel physically sick knowing that you gave him everything now and it still wasn’t enough. 
then, as if hearing your thoughts, kai carefully slides his hand around your cheek, which is currently somewhat numb from the coldness of the window and bumpiness of the ride, and softly places your head on his shoulder.
when you finally get to your apartment, you invite him in. he can tell you just don't want to be alone, but he doesn't say anything, just wraps an arm around you as you lead him into your bedroom. after plopping down in your bed, he turns to leave before you grab the end of his shirt.
"can you stay with me?" you plead. and he nods without a word. lying down next to you before pulling you in his warm embrace.
"you know, i think you're gonna be just fine," he whispers into the top of your head. and just like that, the dam breaks, and you finally, finally burst into tears. wail, really. 
you kick your legs like a child, chanting "no, no, no," and lamenting on and on about how things are wrong, wrong, wrong. this isn't how things were supposed to go. he was supposed to fall in love with you and open his eyes and see who’s been with him all along. he’d apologize and kiss you gently to make up for lost time. you hate how you hoped against hope that he would return your feelings and finally, finally start respecting you. but none of that happened the way it should. the way you so fervently hoped it would.
kai just pats your head and rubs your hair, all while cooing "shhh, i know. i know.”
you lay there with him, legs all tangled together and heart aching until you fall into a fitful sleep. 
-
you miss beomgyu, that goes without saying, but it's getting easier these days. this is due in no small part to kai’s persistence. he comes to see you nearly every day and calls you when he can’t. you spend countless nights with him on speakerphone. most nights, he talks about his day, where he went, the people he saw. on the really, really bad nights, he’s just trying to console you. like right now. 
“shh, it’s okay. i know,” he whispers into the phone.
“i-i’m sorry, hyuka. i’m just so sad,” you sob.
“no, don’t be sorry. why are you sorry?” he coos.
“because i’m dumping this all over you. it’s not your job to baby me,” you cry, feeling guilty beyond words, which only makes you cry harder.
“you’ve done the same for me. you know that. i couldn’t have gotten through my breakup if it weren’t for you, so you don’t need to be sorry. i’m here. i’ll always be here.” if you were less confused and hurt, you’d hear the extent of his tenderness. you might even realize how he’s bending over backwards in a way that’s reminiscent of the way you did for beomgyu. the way somebody who really loves you only ever does. but as it is, you don’t register any of it.
-
beomgyu shows up at your doorstep, sometimes. he doesn’t ever really say anything other than your name in a desperate voice between pleas to let him in, but you never do. you have no idea how strong your resolve will or won’t be if you see his face again, so you do your best to avoid him altogether. on a particularly bad night, though, you feel your self control waning. listening to what he has to say just once couldn’t hurt, right? you can’t stand the uncertainty and this seemingly endless purgatory you find yourself in now. you decide, no matter what the outcome is, you’ll put a stop to it tonight.
with newfound courage, you lightly crack your front door to come face to face with the boy who's been haunting you for months now. his red-rimmed eyes widen in shock as he finally sees you in person instead of from his friend’s instagram account. 
“what do you want?” you attempt to ask coolly, but you sound unsteady even to your own ears. beomgyu doesn’t seem to notice, though, and if does, he doesn’t say anything about it. 
“i just wanna talk to you,” he pleads, and you nod before widening the door and letting him in. you gesture for him to take a seat next to you on your couch and he cautiously sits while never breaking eye contact with you, as if he’s afraid that you’ll disappear if he takes his eyes off of you.
“so?” you ask plainly. he clears his throat as if he's been in a daze until now and nervously begins.
“i-i’m sorry for what i did to you. so, so sorry,” beomgyu says weakly. “and i miss you so much i can’t stand it.”
“then why did you do it?” you ask, not without a hint of malice.
“i.. i don’t know. i think i was just so scared to be hurt that i hurt you instead. but being away from you has shown me just how much i need you.” need. what a strange word coming from beomgyu’s mouth. as for needing you in particular? even stranger. 
“you know, i really didn’t mean to hurt you,” he continues, but even he knows how flimsy his words seem right now.
“i know,” you reply quietly.
“i ruined everything,” he says with a sense of finality, no room for argument. “i know i did. but i-is it always going to be like this? i don’t think i can live without you in my life, one way or another.”
“i don’t know, beomgyu.” he flinches at the use of his full name. “it’s going to take some time before we can be friends again.” if ever. you don’t say those last words, but he can swear he hears them.
“that’s okay,” he says with a smile that doesn’t quite reach his eyes. “as long as you know that i’m sorry, and that you didn’t and don’t deserve how i treated you.”
“i know,”  you repeat. you can’t believe you’re not bawling and pulling him into your arms right now, for better or for worse, but surprisingly, you don’t feel any of the emotions you could’ve bet your life you would feel. you pity him more than anything, and your heart does ache, but more so for the friendship you lost instead of the love that never was. beomgyu wasn’t your best friend for nothing, so as if he can sense how detached you are from him, he says his next words.
“are you seeing him?” he asks with a tinge of melancholy.
“who?” you ask, taken aback at his sudden question.
“c’mon, be serious. kai.”
“k-kai? what do you mean?” he smiles bitterly at your words. 
“i’ve seen the way he looks at you. if you don’t see it yourself, you’re either delusional or blind. after i last saw you, he really told me all about myself.”
“he talked to you after that?” you ask in shock.
“oh yeah. he said he’d beat the brakes off of me if i ever tried to hurt you again, and the only reason why he hadn’t done it already was because you would be sad.” you pause at his earth-shattering words. your sweet hyuka really said that? you can’t imagine someone as soft and caring as him uttering such unforgiving words, but when you think about how much pain he knew you were in, it makes sense. kai had seen the worst parts of you after beomgyu had broken your heart. only he knew just how much you were hurting, and only he would care as much as he did. you don’t know why, but you can’t help but smile softly at the thought of him being so riled up that he acted completely out of character for you. just for you.
“and if i know you, and i do, i’d say that you probably feel the same way he does.” you gasp at his observation. how could he possibly think that?
“y-you’re wrong! we’re just good friends.” best friends, even. you haven’t really thought about kai in that context. everything you’ve ever done seemed purely platonic on your end. but now that you’re really thinking about it, is it actually? the late night phone calls, spending the night in his arms, waking up to kisses on your forehead and promises to see you later. that’s not what “just friends” do, is it? 
“really? then you’d be okay with him acting the same way he does with you with literally anyone else?” you’re at a loss for words at this. what would you do if kai showed his gentleness to anyone else the same way he does for you? how would you react to him staying up all night on the phone with another girl? to him dropping everything just to make sure she’s eaten? to looking at someone else with infinite warmth and care? you wouldn’t like it at all. 
beomgyu smiles sadly at your reaction. he knows now that you’ll never love him again. not in the way he’s realized he loves you. but that’s okay. love is supposed to be selfless. he realizes that now as he watches you stutter and vehemently deny the love you have so obviously begun to have for another man.
on your end, all you can think is: oh god, how long have you been stringing kai along? since your fallout with beomgyu? or even before that? sure, you could hide under the pretense of being each other’s primary support system in heartbreak, but you can’t do that forever. especially not now. in the middle of your reverie, the sound of your front door opening snaps you back to reality. who else would it be besides the boy in question?
“what the fuck are you doing here?” kai growls when he catches sight of beomgyu. he had just stopped by to see if you’re okay since you hadn’t texted him back in awhile. he figured he’d walk in to you sleeping soundly, not to the sight of you and beomgyu getting cozy on your couch. you, of course, were decidedly not getting cozy with beomgyu in the slightest, but kai couldn’t see that in the midst of his rage. 
“me? i’m leaving now,” beomgyu says, sensing danger and cleverly wanting to escape it.
“yeah, you’d better,” kai spits. 
when beomgyu shuts the door behind him, kai immediately turns to you.
“did he hurt you?” you shake your head no. 
“are you okay?” he asks and all you can do is nod. actually, you haven’t felt this okay in a long, long time. things that didn’t previously make sense to you are incredibly clear now. you love kai, you really do. you loved beomgyu, obviously, but those feelings of pain are gone now that you feel the tenderness that is actual, reciprocated love. 
“kai?” you ask in the middle of his barrage of questions about what happened.
“yes?” he asks, completely dropping his interrogation as soon as you say his name. 
“do you love me?” his face crumbles at this question.
“don’t be stupid, of course i love you. you’re my best friend.” 
“not like that. i mean, do you love, love me?” you search his eyes for an answer. his mouth widens and he sputters for a moment before realizing there’s no way out.
“...yes.”
“since when?” you can’t help but ask.
“since always,” he says with a smile, reminiscent of the words you had spoken to beomgyu all that time ago. you can’t even imagine how kai must have felt when he saw you pining after beomgyu, and for so long. actually, you can. that’s how you felt about beomgyu. your heart aches when you think that you’ve unintentionally inflicted the same pain on the sweetest boy you’ve ever known.
“what about your ex?” 
“she’s not you. and i think… i think she knew my heart was never really in it. not like it is with you. i think that’s why she cheated.” it still hurt to be cheated on by her, to be clear, but not more than it did to see your eyes following beomgyu every second of every day. when he cried to you about her, he was really just crying over you.
“i’m… i know you’re not into me like that, and that's okay, it really is. i just don’t want to lose you.” your heart flutters at his words. kai’s selflessness, his care, his indulgence. his love. you try to imagine a world where kai shows the sides he shows to you to someone else. you’d feel absolutely gutted, now that you think about it. unconsciously, you’ve grown to want to monopolize everything about him. you can’t imagine giving him up, not for anyone. not even for beomgyu.
without another word, you gently place your hands on his cheeks and pull his face towards yours. you kiss him softly, tenderly, and he can’t help but gasp before melting into the kiss. there’s so much care behind it along with love, appreciation, and the sense of making up for lost time.
his eyes redden when you insert your tongue into his pliant mouth. 
“s-stop. any more, and i won’t be able to hold back.” “so don’t hold back,” you say as you grab his hand and lead him to your bedroom.
“a-are you sure?” he asks nervously.
“i’m sure,” you say breathily. “i love you, too. so please, just take care of me, okay?” he can’t hold himself back now. the girl he loves is practically begging him to take her, what kind of person would he be if he said no? so he doesn’t. with great care, he strips your clothes off of you and watches in awe as he sees your naked body in front of him. slowly, intentionally, he lays you down on your bed and admires you for all that you are. your cheeks heat up as he presses kisses onto every inch of your trembling body, almost like he’s trying to mark you with a seal that makes you his own, completely. almost like he’s removing traces of anyone else, and you love the feeling of practically being worshiped by a man who’s clearly in love with you.
eventually, his kisses become more and more fiery as he inches towards your fluttering pussy. 
with a curse, he grabs a pillow and shoves it underneath your hips, raising your glistening cunt so you can more easily fully take in the sight of him lapping up your sweetness like he’s starving. you’ve felt similar pleasure before, but nothing quite like this. is this how it feels to be with someone you love who truly loves you back? you think so. your legs are shaking and involuntarily caging him in between them, but he doesn’t try to resist you. it’s like he could die happily in between your legs as he moans into your cunt, the vibrations racking through your body deliciously. he chuckles when you gasp at the feeling of one of his long, knobby fingers entering your heat. he curls experimentally, you cry out his name when he finds your sweet spot and taps it mercilessly, sliding another finger in and following suit. the sweet feeling of his mouth sucking on your clit and the cruel curling of his fingers is enough to bring you to your climax. you cry out his name as your toes curl and legs shake, which only spurs him further, slurping up your slick like he can’t stand the thought of losing a single drop.
“did that feel good, baby? you wanted me to take care of you, right? so just sit back and let me do it. i’ll make you feel better than you ever have.”
he rips off his shirt and unceremoniously tosses it behind him. you’re panting now, gasping for air, but he’s not done with you yet. he sits up and unbuckles his pants, sliding them down his creamy thighs and letting his cock stand tall. his whole body is flushed pink with embarrassment when you take him all in, matching his reddened member, which is currently leaking profusely with precum. he’s so needy for you, and you can see it all over his bright pink face. you should be tired from the intense orgasm he just gave to you, but you can’t help but gulp in anticipation as he lines himself up with your entrance. slowly, he pushes his wide tip in your spasming pussy. 
“o-oh, god,” he says as he splits you open. you can’t even form words because the stretch you feel is absolutely scorching, so you whine instead. tears spring in your eyes as he shakily pulls out then pierces you with one fluid motion, bottoming out completely. 
“y-you’re going to break me,” you cry.
“oh, baby. it’s alright, you can take me,” he says soothingly, but not without a tinge of mischief. that’s all you get before he begins thrusting into you. the harsh curve of his cock dragging along your walls and inadvertently hitting your g spot relentlessly has you opening your mouth, trying not to drool, but failing when he sticks his thumb in your mouth. like a madwoman, you begin to desperately suck on it, which only fuels the fire even more. 
“you look so pretty sucking on me like that,” he coos. “bet you wish it was my dick instead, don’t you?” he snickers as he stuffs his cock into your pussy. “i’ll give it to you every day, okay? you don’t have to beg.” you nod pathetically in agreement. the thought of kai filling you up every day has you needier than before, somehow. you need this feeling, the feeling only he can give you.
his body is scorching hot in your arms. his cock throbbing inside you? even hotter. you watch in awe as he rams himself into you, your whole body shaking with every thrust. 
“t-take it, you can fucking take it. my pretty girl, so fucking perfect for me,” he praises.
this can’t be your sweet, sweet hyuka, right? but as your teary eyes look up at him, you know it has to be. as if he can hear your thoughts, he smirks as he takes one of his hands and lightly grips your throat. it’s not hard enough to hurt you, but enough to have you whimpering. he calls your name lovingly as he drills into your swollen pussy, walls clenching down around him. you whimpering out his name in tandem with the indecent sounds of his balls slapping against you ring inside his head. he feels more and more that he’s losing his grip on reality as he continues to impale you on his cock. a shudder pulsates through you as you feel an orgasm approaching again. you don’t have to say it’s coming, because he can feel it when you clench around him, pussy begging him not to leave as it sucks him in deeper and deeper. 
“fuck, baby, you look so beautiful coming undone around my cock. so gorgeous, this pussy is the best, never wanna leave it.”
neither of you feel particularly sane at the moment, especially not as he clutches your thigh to steady himself as he thoroughly fucks you into your soiled mattress, hand still gripping your throat. 
“gonna come, gonna get you pregnant so everyone knows not to mess with you. do you want that? do you want everyone to know how good i’m fucking you? that you’re all mine?”
“yes, yes, yes! come inside, please!” you manage to choke out. you place your arms around his neck and dig the heels of your feet into his ass as he drills into you. that’s all it takes, really, before his warm seed fills you to the brim. he moans as he releases his grip on your neck and pumps it further and further into you, pushing his load into your cervix as he peppers your face and neck with sweet kisses. 
he collapses, pushing your hair off of your sweaty face so he can get a better look at you. 
“d-did i hurt you?” he asks cautiously, only sobering up now that his release has come.
“it was good, i liked it,” you giggle, admiring his cuteness. he smiles contentedly as he places one hand on your stomach and gently caresses it. 
“you’re so beautiful,” he murmurs. “can’t believe you’re really mine.” mine. what a beautiful word, only made more beautiful by the boy who’s insisting you belong to each other.
“i could say the same thing about you,” you whisper, placing your hand on his blushing cheeks. 
“wanna go again?” he asks, cock already hardening once more.
“w-what?” you ask dumbly as he shifts from beside you.
“i meant it when i said i want everyone to know you’re mine,” he says, positioning himself over you again and sliding his cock up and down your slit. he was right. you’ve never felt this good before in your life, and you wouldn’t want it to be because of anyone else.
taglist: @my313 @superbbananananana @lonelybutterflytae @cherrycolaberry @everythingvirgoes @beomnoullitheorem @sunny4cast @softesyoongi
series taglist*: @gyulinoo @moamidzyism @sooberryworld @dreamxerz @sweetttkissess @gothraccoons @jaxyy219 @idontwantoeatspicy @soobsfairy444 @denleave1088 @notevenheretbh1 @fairfootedflekk @hihello-pinky @ilovesimjaehyun143 @seolis-world @midwinterblizzard @slutty-cherry @run2min
*if you were tagged in part two: beomgyu's ending i assumed u wanted to be tagged in this one too! if i was wrong, i'm sorry n i will delete ur tag jus lmk!!
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daisymbin · 19 days
Text
the unplanned date - kim mingyu
warning: suggestive but not really! just light mentions of past sexual events but thats all. slight use of profanities
pairings: kim mingyu x reader
genre: situationship to lovers lmaooo
word count: 2.8k
a/n: 1. fuck taeil
2. this was originally written for jeonghan but i felt it fitted mingyu better
3. please this took fucking forever because I kept getting writers block and hated the flow but I think I'm satisfied with it now
requests open!
check out my masterlist!
"what? she's cheating on me?” mingyu asked in disbelief. “and what do you mean she's not my girlfriend?” mingyu angrily questioned jun with a slightly raised voice; his forehead and eyebrows scrunched in anger and confusion. “what the hell are you talking about? since when in the world did the two of you date? in another alternate universe??? all she did was go out on one date!” jun countered as he walks to the kitchen to retrieve a glass of water. at that, mingyu left their shared apartment, heading straight to yours; needing answers.
you jump when you hear your doorbell ring, “were you expecting someone?” your roommate seungcheol asked as you both exchange glances while he notes the time, it's 3:07am. “no?” you said as you got up from the sofa where you had been lounging on with seungcheol, binge watching the entire high school musical series but seungcheol stopped you, “wait, i'll get it. its late, it could be some creepy old man.” seungcheol rushed to open the door while you followed close by behind him. as soon as he opened the door, you were both met with a messy, disheveled hair kim mingyu. he’s panting so much that for a second, he looks like he might actually pass out. “mingyu? what are you doing here at this hour?” seungcheol asked as he opened the door wider for him to enter. “did you run here???” you asked. “yes but thats not the point right now,” mingyu pauses to catch his breath, “did you go out on a date with jun's classmate? are you cheating on me?”
seungcheol's brows slightly furrowed at mingyu's words, “woah calm down. why dont you come in first?” he asked as he tugged on mingyu's sleeves, ushering him in. “alright, im gonna be in my room to give you two some….privacy. no funny business please, its 3am and I could use some sleep.”
mingyu inpatiently waited for seungcheol to retreat to his room before he sprung his question yet again onto you. “so??? are you not going to answer me??” it was clear that mingyu is frustrated as he laid his clenched fist on the kitchen counter. “what the fuck are you talking about? cheating on you? we're not even together!” you countered back as your forehead and eyebrows scrunched in confusion & slight anger matching mingyu's. “I'm asking you why the hell I just heard from jun that you went on a date with that new guy boy from his biology class?” mingyu knew he was being slightly petty but still, how could you? you watched as he slowly unclench his fists only to grip at the corners of the kitchen counter. “like i said, you and i? we're not together mingyu. I'm free to date whoever I want, isn't it? that was the rule you set, is it not?” you asked in anger.
“what do you mean we're not together?” mingyu paused before he continued. his question was laced with confusion and a hint of heartbreak but of course, he tried to mask it with even more frustration. “we hold on hands all the damn time y/n! we spend time together, A LOT of time together might i add, we stay over at each other's place, we nap together, we sleep together, we cuddle, we hug, we kiss, you play with my hair all the time and i do too! i mean, for god's sake, we fuck each other! what do you mean we're not together?”
“so what, mingyu?’’ your own voice and tone took you aback for a second, the words came out harsher than you would have liked but you dont falter. “weren’t you the one who said you didn't want anything serious to begin with? weren't you the one who said that we’re only keeping things casual and nothing more? so why are you here at my apartment at ass o'clock screaming at me about cheating on you?” you had made sure to put out air quotes for those last 3 words.
this time, there was a clear dip in mingyu's voice, softer, more tender, more vulnerable. “well…yes but that was before.. that was when we were still… I don't know, fucking around but now we're definitely not! the things we do are definitely not just… fucking around things! you know what I mean! why are you making this so hard!” mingyu was exasperated, that much was clear. you watch as he now has his arms folded and his pout coming to light, making your heart clench at the sight. “gyu...” you said as you let out a small sigh, mingyu perked up at his nickname, his gaze shifting to you. “I'm not trying to make anything hard and you know that. how was i supposed to know anything? how was i supposed to know what you want if you don't tell me?”
“I thought you'd know by now…i-i thought it was obvious by now…I thought we both…”
“you thought we both what mingyu? you can't just keep all these thoughts to yourself without telling me and expect me to know anything because trust me, I don't! I don't know how you feel about me, I don't know if any of this is as serious for you as it is for me, god, I don't know what your intentions are! all I know from you is that this is all just casual and nothing more! and you know what's the worst part of it all? it's that I can't even ask you about it because then I'm gonna come off as clingy and needy and it's pathetic to even imagine presenting myself that way to you!” your lips were now pressed together in a thin line; an overwhelming feeling of shame and embarrassment taking over you, forcing you to look away from him to avoid eye contact and you start to feel your eyes prick you with tears threatening to spill.
“you know I'd never think that of you... i just…I'm not good with words. I don't know how to tell you what I want or how I feel about you. I just get so tongue tied when it comes to you. I really thought that maybe if I lo-” mingyu all but stopped himself with a deep sigh, unable to voice out his hidden feelings for you. he took a few seconds to find a replacement for that word before he took another deep breath & continued, “I really thought that maybe if I just… let things be and let my feelings act on their own that maybe you'd pick up on it and we would just…” he ended with a sigh that was barely audible. you would have missed it if you weren't all focused on him.
his voice trailing off and quivering only forced you to quickly blink your tears away to look back at him; the sight of his shoulders slumped and his head looking down, not meeting your eyes only broke your heart even more. is it possible for your heart to feel so heavy and sad, yet filled with so much hope? because that's definitely how you're feeling right now.
regardless of how much you think you know what mingyu is trying to say, you still wanted him to say it, you still wanted to hear it from him. this friends with benefits situationship thing has been going on long enough for a year & a half now & that doesnt include the years before when you were both friends. everyone knows you're both kind of a thing yet not really. no matter how much the boys pushed for mingyu to make it official, mingyu always brushed them off and said that he didn't have to, that you already know what you both had, but in this moment, it dawned on him that what he thought he had with you isn't what you thought you had with him. all the self loathe and heartbreak he's feeling right now couldn't have made him feel more stupid than he already was.
“gyu can you- can you try? can you try telling me? Just… take your time, im here, im listening, I have all the time in the world for you, just try baby. I just want to know how you really feel, I just want to know what you want for yourself and for us.” your hands reached out for his with a mind of its own.
looking down at your joined hands, mingyu starts moving his thumb mindlessly at the back of your hand, caressing them gently. it's now that he realizes how utterly stupid he has been. “baby i-” yours eyes follow his hands as they now draw circles on yours as you gave him a light squeeze of encouragement. “go on gyu, im listening.”
“I don't know how to do this. I know I said I didn't want anything serious at the start of it and that it's just casual but… but that was before you- do you remember our first date?” mingyu gathers all the courage he could find in himself and cautiously brings his eyes to yours. “what date?” you didn't want to sound rude or cold but as far as you could remember, you've never had any dates with mingyu. your relationship with him started off as just being friends for years, evolving into a friends with benefits situation which was strictly only physical needs late at night, outside of that, you were nothing more, well, at least for the first few months that is. until….unless..? was he talking about the first time you both hung out together alone without the boys outside of the bedroom and while the sun is still out? “do you mean…the flea market?” you asked as realization dawned on you; that was the day your friends with benefits relationship evolved into something that was like a relationship but not really, the cursed situationship type of thing.
mingyu chuckles as he realizes how sentimental he looks right now, although, he's not sure if you can tell. his shy smile and fangs peeking through as he watches the gears in your head turn. “well..what about that day mingyu?” truth be told, you remember that day clear as day, but you can't pinpoint exactly what mingyu is trying to say; there wasn't really anything…special or anything that stood out that day, well, other than the fact that you were both out and not in bed that is.
“that was the first time we hung out together alone after we started the whole friends with benefits thing. do you remember? that night before that, when we broke our first rule of not sleeping over?” a quiet mhm was all you could let out, unsure of where mingyu is going with this. “do you even remember why I called you over that night?”
“you were sad. your hamster….he passed away.” you said carefully. “mhm he did. and that evening, that night, it was the first time you came over and we didn't…we didn't do anything. you held me, comforted me and let me wet your t-shirt with my tears. you insisted on putting me to bed and cuddling me to sleep for the first time and told me that you'd leave after I've fallen asleep. I still remember your slight hesitation that night when I'd asked you to stay over and not leave. did you know? i felt my heart sank a little when you hesitated but that was just the first of many realization that i- that i was in love with you.” your heart fluttered at his admission, “the first of many? were there more?”
for the first time tonight, mingyu let out a laugh, the one you loved so much. “of course there's more. when we woke up the next morning, my head was pounding so bad from all the crying the night before and I was so sad when I woke up alone in bed because I thought you had left but it was almost as if you had some psychic power and knew I was awake, you were screaming from the kitchen saying you know I was awake and asked me to get my ass over to the kitchen!” mingyu laughed harder this time, his hand coming up to tuck a stray hair behind your ear. “that was because I had just came back from the bakery! my hands were full so I accidentally let the door slam a little and I was sure that that would have woken you up!” you giggled while trying to defend yourself.
“you even got me my favourite cake from the bakery and all my other favourite pastries for breakfast. you must have been so in love with me ~" mingyu joked while raising his eyebrows suspiciously at you and you all but fall silent. you cleared your throat before you teased him back, “so? that's why you like me? because I cuddled you to sleep and bought you food? how easy can you be kim mingyu!”
“no that's not why! although i'll admit, it did click something in me. made me realise how well you know me and how well you take care of me. but that wasn't it! it was when you suggested we go to the flea market after breakfast just to take a walk to clear my mind for a bit. do you remember what happened there?”
“we walked and talked about silly things as always, what else? ah, you tried tanghulu for the first time! I remember that.” you recall giddily at how his eyes widened brightly at the sweetness of tanghulu when he took his first bite. “not that, silly! we ran into your ex & I had told him that i was your boyfriend and asked him to back off, do you know why I did that?” “because you pity me?” you joked, you know mingyu would never pity you, he's not a bad person but you couldn't pass up an opportunity to tease him. mingyu sighed dramatically at that, “no, I said I was your boyfriend because I saw the way he was looking at you…and it made me jealous. it made me realise that, that's the way I always look at you. it made me realise that I don't ever want anyone else to look at you that way and that I want you to look at me that way. me and only me. i-i realised that it's not just sex I want with you. that's why after that day, I kept bringing us out for dinner and stuff. or even just to hang out at home and watch stupid romcoms just to spend time with you. so I thought that, when our relationship from simply friends with benefits isn't friends with benefits anymore that you'd get it i guess…i don't know…saying it out loud right now sounds so stupid… I probably should have said something earlier… I'm sorry.” mingyu had his eyes on his hands again, guilt and embarrassment washing over him.
"thank you, gyu-ah. I really needed to hear all of that from you.” you lifted your hand to rest your palm on his cheeks, guiding his eyes back to you. “does that mean you like me too?” silly silly kim mingyu you thought. “no of course not!” you joked a failed joke because it seems kim mingyu didn't get the joke when he let out a quiet oh. “you're so silly kim mingyu. can't you tell im in love with you by now? how much more obvious can a girl get?” mingyu ears perked up at your words, then, smiling so big his jaws almost hurt. his hands turn to pull you by your wrists, placing them around his waist as he pulled you into a hug. your hands move up to rest on his neck and the other in his hair, tugging them lightly at the scalp. “I love you, I'll do better for you.” he spoke so close to your ear his lips almost brush them. “I love you too, thank you, I'll do better for you too.” your words only caused mingyu to tighten his hold on you, “can we go to bed now? I'm so tired and I want to sleep with my girlfriend.” he whined pouting. “yes we can, boyfriend.” you answered with a smile as you start dragging your big puppy into your bedroom, excited for more cuddles to come.
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0nlythrowharrybeaux · 7 months
Text
The Stunt ^**
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This one is based off of the following request where Harry and Y/N are in a PR relationship and he realizes he likes her until it's all over.
A shout out to whoever created that AI pic, it was a repost from TikTok so I'm not sure who actually made it!
Warnings: PR relationship, mentions of PR drama from the past/present, heartbreak & failed relationships, verbal arguments, jealousy, a quick non-consensual kiss, alcohol consumption, fingering, oral (fem receiving), unprotected sex
WC: 19.6K
It seemed really stupid to you, a PR relationship with your co-star for a film? Sure, this was your debut into acting, but you had confidence in your ability to perform well and were certain that the film would do great, it was a lovely story! You didn’t need additional PR help to make the film successful. You loved the script, it was a nice, yet realistic friends-to-lovers story. It had range, happiness, sadness, comedy, intimacy…you wouldn’t have chosen a stupid script for your first attempt at the silver screen! So the fact that your agent had written this into the contract with whoever your co-star was going to be, it felt a little insulting to you. 
“It’s offensive! I don’t want to fake date anyone, Fred!” You whined into the phone, “Everyone’s going to see it coming from a mile off…what if they cast someone I hate? What’s gonna happen then?” You asked and he spoke calmly, trying to appease you.
“Think of it as more acting practice! You have to act like you’re into the person when in public.”
“No one is going to agree to that.”
“Sweetheart, everyone will agree to it. It’s a classic PR move! They’re just gonna be kicking themselves for not thinking of it first! It basically guarantees film success for these rom-com type of things.” He said and you sighed and nearly hung up out of frustration. You wished that he had at least asked your permission before including this in the contract.
A few weeks later you were called in by the production and directing team for a few chemistry tests with the two actors that they were split between. They didn’t want to tell you who they were looking at for casting as to prevent any bias on your part during the chemistry read. They wanted to see it for themselves who you vibed with the most. Fred had told you to stop trying to figure it out because both picks were fairly new to the acting world. And when the day came, you were sick to your stomach. You hardly ate anything since the night before because of it. 
When you were introduced to the first guy you did recognize him a bit but you couldn’t really place him. He shared that he had done a lot of supporting work and this would be his first time in a lead role if he got it. He was trying so hard though, trying to make it look like you guys were vibing well. Your interactions felt really inauthentic. The way he would knock his head back and laugh in an exaggerated manner whenever you said something slightly humorous, the way he would lean in closer to speak to you, and touch your arm or shoulder even when you crossed them over your body to indicate that you were uncomfortable. Then when you guys did a couple of test scenes, one of them being the lead up to one of the more intense dialogues between the characters, he came on really strong and theatrically and it was cringey; even you knew that he wasn’t it as they thanked him for his time and off he went.
“We’re gonna break for a few minutes. Meet back in here in 10!”  Someone announced and you took full advantage to go make yourself a tea while they reset the makeshift “set”. Fred knew better than to talk to you right now, you were still quite annoyed at him for putting you in the PR dating situation. So when you felt someone come up beside you, you didn’t say anything, he’d get the hint.
“Ummm, pardon?” You heard an unfamiliar voice and you did a double take over your shoulder when you realized that the person who was looming behind you patiently was Harry Styles, the glasses he had on threw you off a bit.
“Oh god, sorry! I’m taking up the whole counter aren’t I?” You apologized as you grabbed your phone and dropped it in your purse and grabbed that from the top of the counter to make space for him and he smiled at you.
“That’s alright.” He assured you, “I just wanted to introduce myself before we all have to head back in.” He explained and you nodded. You quickly set down your tea packet and extended your hand to his and you shook it firmly and briefly. “I’m Harry.” He introduced himself.
“Y/N.” You smiled warmly.
“I know. Umm, I really liked your EP.” He said to you and your eyes widened in surprise.
“Oh wow, thank you so much! I like your glasses.” You said stupidly and he laughed as he glanced down at the ground between you and you mentally scolded yourself, “ Y-your albums too!” You added in, “I genuinely love all of your albums.” You giggled, trying to mask the star stuck feeling and embarrassment from your little blunder. “The last one, it was phenomenal! I put so many friends onto it.” You shared and he smiled timidly as he glanced away for a moment again before looking back at you.
“Thank you, that’s very generous of you.” He thanked you modestly, as if he hadn’t won an album of the year Grammy for it.
“It really was the least I could do. Great work.” You assured and he chuckled. You knew that one of his best friends was producing this film and you’d heard rumors that he might be writing on the soundtrack, so while you were shocked that he was here for this chemistry/screen test you didn’t think it too odd. Maybe it was going to help him get the vibes between you and whoever else they cast opposite you so that he could start working on the music. “So are you going to be writing some pieces for the soundtrack?” You asked and he nodded.
“Yeah, I thought the script was so genuine and I don’t know, I’m quite partial to hyperrealistic stories like this. The ones that show the challenges as well as the good things.” He said and you nodded.
“Oh my god, same. I know that films should sometimes be an escape, a reprieve if you will, from reality and just be optimistic and romanticize the good but I really love it when it feels like I’m looking in the mirror, you know? Or when it helps me relate to others more. I just love the humanity so much.” You explained and he nodded along. 
“Yeah, definitely.” He agreed. “What do you love most about this story?”
“Just the hope of it all…” you sighed happily, “I mean, who isn’t a sucker for a good friends-to-lovers trope? That whole “it’s been you all along” moment has happened to so many of us, I think. Like it’s the ideal scenario for falling in love, no? When you discover that your love for someone is so much bigger than you thought it was. But what I loved most is the way Cara learns to love herself and knows when to choose herself. It’s shows so much strength and integrity to herself. But yeah, I mean the love story between the two characters is also really great, so…normal.” You hummed. 
“Yeah, it’s so pure, isn’t it? I love how it builds so realistically, like you know all the good bits but also all the bad bits of a person and still love them and they you just as you are.”
“Exactly.” You hummed and he smiled.
“And how’d the last guy do with that?” He asked you, “You can be honest, I won’t tell.” He assured you with a little grin.
“Honestly, a little too forced for my liking. Like fake laughing and inside jokes kind of thing, it was a bit cringey. And well, the acting was far too theatrical for film in my opinion. He very clearly comes from a theater background, it was like really over the top.” You explained to him and he hummed.
“Hmmm…Well, I hope I do better than that.” He said and you froze.
“Wait. You’re the other choice?” You asked him and he nodded, “Oh…”
“I didn’t come and say hi just for fun. It was strictly business.” He joked with a playful grin and you shook your head in disbelief.
“And here I thought you were just here out of the kindness of your heart. To like pick up on the vibes for inspiration for the music.” You chuckled, feeling even more nervous now. “I was basically told that this was amateur hour by my agent.”
“Well, between the two of us, I’m quite the amateur when it comes to acting.” He said and you laughed a little in disbelief.
“Are you fucking kidding me? This is my first acting gig since…my high school play where I was dragged into playing Rizzo because the original cast member dropped out the week before because she hated how she looked in the wig!” You exclaimed, “Please forget the modesty. You’ve been in a Nolan film!” You said to him and he furrowed his eyebrows.
“Yeah, and all I did was swim around in the freezing cold ocean trying not to drown in that heavy ass uniform. The panic I portrayed was very real! There was no acting talent required. I was genuinely fighting for my life on that set.” He joked and you laughed and shook your head. 
“Well, I think you’ll get the part. We’re genuinely laughing, right? Or are you acting so well that I can’t tell whether it’s genuine or not?” You asked and he raised his eyebrows smugly.
“Definitely acting, even wore my glasses since the character does int eh script.” He said  jokingly and you giggled.
“Well, they suit you.” You complimented and he smiled bashfully.
“Thanks.” He responded, “But ummm, we are genuinely laughing…I think we’ll do good in there.” He said with a little more confidence.
“I think so too.” You hummed.
“Here’s to hoping. Well, I’m gonna head back in now, but I’ll see you in there, okay? Wish me luck!” He smiled warmly and you smiled and nodded as you watched him head back into the reading room.
************
It almost goes without saying that Harry was cast as the other lead opposite you. You guys did get along well and you also read well together, the screen test was great too. It was evident how personal these roles felt to each of you. So after a few days you were sitting before each other with your teams present to work out the terms of this PR relationship you’d have. It was all pretty basic; some of the parameters set were that this was business so no canoodling outside of the contractually obligated appearances, there were an agreed upon number of appearances you’d have to do during and post production. There were strict boundaries on what PDA was okay and what wasn’t, it was all very straight forward. So with both parties having most of their conditions met, you guys signed the contract.
…. ONE MONTH LATER ….
Now, you guys were a quarter of the way through filming and being the delusional hopeless romantic you were, you’d started developing real feelings for Harry. He was just so sweet and fun and thoughtful. For example, your birthday had fallen during production and he bought you flowers and a cake and had everyone sing ‘Happy Birthday’ to you. Or when you had a scheduled appearance but were feeling ill from your period cramps, instead of making you sit through dinner at a restaurant, he drove you to the nearest pharmacy and walked around with you to buy you tampons and snacks. You loved it and everyone else did too. Or just little thoughtful things he’d do for the staff after a long day, he was just a complete sweetheart and it was getting harder and harder for you to just ignore it and not take his kindness all that personally.
Harry wasn’t really one to talk your ear off, he loved conversation, but mostly the listening bit. He liked to learn and hear other people’s thoughts and opinions. Like a sponge, he absorbed all the information and stowed it away for a later time. You could tell by the way he looked at you that he was listening. Like now…
“-it was just really stupid.” You sighed in slight irritation, “Like you just don’t follow someone to their car in a parking garage at night to ask for their picture!” You ranted and he nodded.
“You’re absolutely right. That’s scary, when someone follows you all the way to your car…”
“It was! And it was one of those things where like, if I started to run I knew they would start running after me so I tried to stay calm but in the end I just freaked out a little bit.” You explained, “Fuck, now they’re going to write shit about me being rude online.” You sighed as you guys drove out to the wine bar you were going to be spending some time at this evening.
“Look, you know you did nothing wrong and you’ve never lost it on someone before. If they do post that video and see an empty car park no one is going to think you were being rude. You can’t chase down a woman at night in a parking structure.” He said and you sighed.
“You’re right…” you agreed after you calmed down a bit. “H-how do you do it?”
“Chase women down?” He asked with a playful smile and you rolled your eyes and giggled at his little joke.
“Seriously though. Like deal with the obsessed people and the stalkers that just follow you around from a distance.”
“It is scary for me too. I mean, it sucks to say you get used to it, but you will.” He said and you nodded, “Like I don’t really go out alone in the evenings any more, try to do everything in the day time, with friends if possible. And like at night I’ll drive if I really need to go out, but like I’ve caught people trying to sneak in behind my car at the gate at my home in London. Or just like wait out there for me to come and go. I hate having security there all the time, but for a time I did have someone around patrolling a bit, it did help. Gave me some peace of mind, you know?”
“Yeah…well sorry if I…dampened the mood, I’m just still a little shaken up.” You explained.
“No, I get it.” He assured you with a smile, “Well the wine bar we’re going to is very low-key, so I don’t think anyone will bug us until we walk out to leave. Unless you’re in the mood for something else?” He asked you and you shook your head.
“The wine bar sounds really good right now.” You said to him and he smiled.
Your evening with Harry had been really fun. Not that you guys never had fun, but he was being extra sweet and attentive considering what had happened to you the night before. There were an assortment of board games available to play or you could choose to color and talk, but seeing as you weren’t too keen on any of the games you pulled out your trusty deck of cards from the depths of your purse. He found it extremely amusing that you just had that in your purse but went easy on the teasing. 
You rotated playing a few games, you taught him how to play 21 and Speed and it was getting so competitive. Obviously, you were at an advantage considering you knew how to play the games already. He did alright at 21, but when you started to play speed your expertise shone. You were kicking his ass and eventually beat him enough times (four times) that he decided it was time to change games. He kicked your ass at Scrabble and Connect 4 for retribution, but by that point you’d had at least four glasses of wine and were pretty tipsy. He was too, he was all giggly and pink in the cheeks and the tip of his nose, almost as if he were freezing cold and not teeming with warmth. His voice had dropped a bit deeper and his eyes had a slight glassy sheen over them and they were a bit lidded. You were both far more touchy now, it started rather innocently though.
“You’re cheating.” You said to him as he laughed.
“How can you cheat at Scrabble!?” He asked through his laugh.
“You’re picking your tiles.”
“I am not!” He scoffed through a laugh.
“Let me pick one for you then.”
“Hell no.”
“I’m only getting consonants! I need to prove that something is up.”
“How is that possible?”
“It just is!” You said and he laughed.
“Only if I can pick your letter.”
“Okay, deal.” You agreed and you drew his next five tiles after he’d put down ‘reflex’ joint to your previous word, ‘car’. 
“I got one consonant, a good one too.” He said as he arranged them on his rack.
“Of course you did…” you murmured as you looked over your options. You really only had consonants. “Okay…” you said as you grabbed the only three tiles that would work with what was on the board, “Eggs.” You said with a small smile as you tagged on the g-g-s to one of the e’s in ‘reflex’ and he burst into laughter.
“That’s all you have?! I don’t believe this.” He said.
“It is!” You laughed through your insistence.
“Let me see.” He said reaching for your rack of letters and you batted his hand away.
“Stop cheating!”
“I’m not! I’m trying to help you.” He chuckled as he grabbed your wrists in one hand to grab the rack and turn it towards him. When he saw your letters his smile dropped, “Mmmm, I see your predicament. And here I thought you just couldn’t spell…” He teased with a smirk and you arched your eyebrows up at his little joke.
“Ha-ha.” You mocked and he chuckled.
“Come here.” He said patting the spot beside him on the tabletop and you were tipsy enough that you didn’t question it. You dragged your stool over beside his and he sighed that you were too far and you squealed in surprise when he grabbed the edge and tugged you even closer to him as easily as if he had slid your empty glasses of wine out of the way. You knew he was strong, you’d seen it with your own eyes over the course of your professional relationship together. But with your growing feelings and the wine fogging up your brain you melted inside at this simple display of strength.
“Geez!” You gasped and he chuckled.
“Sorry.” He hummed with a smile before patting at your hip and looking back at the rack of letters he took from you. “Okay, so…you’re a bit fucked.” He said after scanning the rack some more.
“Well, you didn’t need to drag me over here to tell me that.” You giggled and he turned to you.
“Well, you’re here now, so win-win I’d say.” He flirted and you felt the blood rushing up to your face and making your cheeks and ears go hot.
You didn’t move from his side the rest of the time you were there. All games were forgotten, you were just fiddling with each other’s fingers under the table, your hand resting over his thigh, talking nonsense, and giggling as the alcohol got to the both of you. The way he was looking at you was making you feel like the only other person on the planet. You typically shied away from intense, undivided attention but he wasn’t ostentatious in the way he gave it. It was subtle and personal, it made you feel seen. After ordering one more glass you decided it was time to go, so Harry called your driver. You were getting hungry for some real food as you’d only been munching on the complementary bread they’d been bringing you guys.
“Bill’s here.” He informed you and you reached for your bag while Harry came around and helped you off of the high stool. You were wearing some heels because he was just so tall, but of course, your landing was a bit shaky and you both laughed as he grabbed around your waist. “You good?” He asked with a grin and you nodded up at him, “Sure?”
“M’sure. Just got a little wobbly there.” You giggled as you glanced up at him.
“Here.” He said extending his hand.
“It’s alright. I’m good.” You assured him.
“I’m sure you are, but we’re supposed to do the pictures for the paps, remember?” He said more quietly.
“Oh right, right…” you mumbled and it made you a bit sad as you handed your hand over. He took it and started guiding you though the bar to get out.
You could see people in the bar also taking videos of you guys walking out, calling all this attention to yourself like you were supposed to. But hey, at least you were holding his hand. When you guys got outside the flashes started going off and the paps were calling out to you both but you kept your eyes down at Harry’s shoes, you were a little too tipsy for this. Harry’s grip on you tightened as he pulled you to the car waiting right along the curb and then opened the door to help you in before sliding in behind you.
“God, didn’t think there’d be so many.” He said and you nodded as you buckled up.
“Heading home?” Bill asked.
“Yeah, please. And can you make a little detour on the way so we could get some food?”
“Certainly.”
“Okay, we’re still choosing we’ll pick something on route to her place.”
“Sounds good, just let me know.” He smiled and Harry thanked him before asking you again what you wanted. 
You eventually settled on some dumpling place on the way and placed your order online so that it would be ready to pick up when you arrived. Thankfully, that all went to plan and soon you were being dropped off at your house. The lack of stimulation really perpetuated the tipsiness you were both feeling. You were laughing as you navigated your way to your kitchen in mostly the dark, guiding Harry through so that he wouldn’t get hurt.
“Here we are. Can’t wait to eat.” You said and he nodded in agreement. You guys split the food and then curled up on your couch to watch something on the TV while you ate and chatted. Harry started to sober up a lot faster than you which was great as he had to go home after this. You were trying to get on his level so you chugged your big glass of water and then dropped back onto the couch.
“You feeling alright?”
“Yeah, a bit better.” You said and he smiled.
“Good. Did you have fun?” He asked and you nodded.
“A lot of fun actually. Though to be fair, I think you pick fun things to do.” You said and he smiled.
“Oh good! I mean I think I’m quite boring.” He confessed.
“No…I don’t think you’re boring at all. I’m definitely more of a homebody so getting to do all these different things has actually been really great.” You assured him.
“Funny, I pegged you as more of an extrovert than me.” He said and you shook your head.
“Oh no, I’m definitely more introverted than anything.” You chuckled.
“You know, I have a lot of fun with you too. I’m glad it’s you I get to do this with.” He said as he glanced towards you and you smiled down at your lap.
“Yeah, me too.” You responded weakly, but he didn’t catch it, thankfully. 
Truth be told, you were still tipsy and were having a hard time getting down to his level of sobriety. And with that came this avalanche of sincerity that could not be avoided or misdirected. In fact, the longer he stayed with you the more you felt the thread of your composure starting to fray. You were fighting against yourself and your need to get closer to him, you wanted to feel his warmth radiating onto you, you wanted the scent of his cologne to waft over you as you buried yourself into his side. You wanted to feel the rumble of his chest when he spoke lowly to you.
“Hey, are you alright?”
“Yeah, yeah. Just…thinking.” You said through a tight lipped smile.
“About?”
“Just the film and how much fun I’m having. S’gonna be sad when it’s over.”
“Yeah, it will be. But you don’t have to think about it being over just yet.” He reminded. “We’ve still got a couple more months of filming and things…and this.” He said and you nodded.
“Yeah, you’re right.” You decided and suddenly stood up. “I need to go to the bathroom. Ummm, let me take all of this…” you said of your food containers.
“It’s alright, I’ve got this, you go on.” He assured you and with one more confirmation via a firm nod you headed off to the bathroom.
You just needed to splash some cold water on your face or something. Do anything to freshen up a little and get out of your head. So you did just that as soon as you’d relieved yourself. You grabbed one of the hand towels and soaked it with cold water and dabbed it all over your face. After a few moments you were heading back out and to the kitchen where Harry was just filling up the bag the dumplings had come in with you trash.
“Do you want the vinegar and and chili oil?” He asked, hearing your steps behind him.
“Ummm, just the chili oil. I repurpose it.” You said and he smiled and dropped in the two little sauce cups of black vinegar before tying it up. “You can just leave it, I have to take it out back.” 
“Sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure.”
“Alright. Well, it’s nearing 1am, I should get going.” He said as he turned around and you nodded.
“Yeah. Ummm, are you good t-to drive?” You asked and he nodded.
“Yeah, the food really sealed the deal.” He chuckled and you smiled.
“Positive? You can stand on one leg?” You asked jokingly and he did so. “Count down from 100 in intervals of 7?” You asked with a raised eyebrow and he scrunched his face down pensively.
“I can try…I didn’t finish high school so it might be a bit harder for me thank most.” He said with a small grin.
“Mmm…don’t think that’ll hold up in court.” You joked and he laughed and shook his head.
“You’re quite funny, you know?” He said and you smiled and shrugged.
“Triple threat.”
“I think that third is supposed to be the dancing bit actually.”
“Who cares about dancing? Would you rather a partner who can dance or who makes you laugh?”
“Mmm…Facts.” He smiled and you shrugged.
“No brainer.” You said and he nodded, “Okay, I’ll uh, I’ll walk you out.” You said and you guys made your way to your door.
“Genuinely, I’ve had an especially fun time with you tonight.” Harry said as you got into the foyer.
“Me too. I’ve never done something like that before.”
“Well, we could always do it again, maybe you’ll have better luck with Scrabble.” He smiled and you chuckled.
“Yeah, maybe.” You said, “Hey so ummm, in a few months the LA Opera is opening up Turandot.” You said and he looked at you quizzically, “I’m sure you know the most famous song, or at least heard it?”
“How does it go?”
“It’s the…Nessun dorma, nessun dorma. Tu pure o principessa, nella tua fredda stanza… you’ve heard it.” You said and he nodded.
“Yeah, I think I have.”
“Yeah, it’s this incredible Italian opera and I’ve always wanted to see it but none of my friends are really into that. Not that you are, but you said you like classical music, this is kind of a branch of of that…in a way and-”
“I’d love to go.” He said and you smiled.  
“Really?”
“Yeah, sure. We could tally off another one of our appearances.” He said and you bit your lip as the pang of hurt radiated from your chest and out to the rest of your body. But you smiled and nodded.
“Y-yeah, exactly. Just get another one of those out of the way.” You responded, trying your best to ward off the growing knot that was lodged up in your throat. You really were just inviting him as a friend, not as part of your PR arrangement, so the sting of rejection remained.
“Cool, I’ll get the details from my team then.”
“Yeah.” You nodded, holding back the need to cry now. It hurt so bad, you hadn’t been in this position in a long while, the unrequited affections position. You really just struggled with dating so you hadn’t really spent a lot of time with someone you were into in a long time so everything was just intensified in a way, including the disappointment. You quickly opened up the door to get him out of there as soon as possible so that you could go cry it out for a bit. “Remember we don’t shoot tomorrow morning.” You reminded and he smiled.
“Positive?” He asked as he turned to you and you nodded.
“It’s an afternoon shoot tomorrow.” 
“Okay, thank you. When’s call time?”
“For you it’s 3pm.” You said and he nodded.
“Okay…I really should start adding these to my calendar.”
“You should.” You concurred as he turned back to you with a smile.
“Well, I’ll see you tomorrow then.” He said and you nodded and he stepped closer and went in for a hug. You did hug sometimes, but you didn’t want to just now, but you gave in anyway, relaxing into his embrace as he squeezed around you just a bit. “Sleep well, alright?” He said softly as he started to pull back and you nodded but then he turned his head a bit and your noses bumped together.
“Sorry-”
“S’my fault.” He chuckled and then glanced down at your lips. “I ummm…” he trailed off and just grabbed your jaw gently and tilted it up and kissed you quickly on the lips. You didn’t even have time to react before he pulled away. “Shit.” He cursed. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry! Obviously, that was a mistake, I shouldn’t have done that.” He rambled as he let you go and took a step back.
“It’s alright, Harry.” You said and he shook his head.
“I didn’t even ask you and ummm…I don’t know, something just came over me and I wasn’t thinking. I didn’t mean t-to kiss you. Fuck…” he cursed at himself.
“Harry, I’m not upset. It’s fine.” You assured, trying to hint at the fact that you were very okay with this. 
“It’s not fine, Y/N. It’s not.” He said firmly and you couldn’t help it as your eyes started to well up, “It was a mistake. I’m not like into- like it just happened, okay?” He said instead and you just nodded. He was backed up enough now that he couldn’t see your glassy eyes all that well anymore.
“I get it, Harry. Drive safe.” You rushed out and then hurried inside and closed your door before locking it and resting your forehead against it as a soft sob broke past your throat.
*****************
After the initial shock wore off Harry rushed up to your door again, about to knock and apologize again but just as his first raised up he heard the latch of the deadbolt and sighed in defeat. He rested his forehead against the thick door for just a moment before he walked to his car. He got in and then glanced up to see if he could spot you through a window or make out where in the house you were by the flick of a light, but it just stayed dark for a minute or so and he shook his head.
“Fuck…fuck me.” He grumbled before taking off.
Harry actually had no idea where that impulse to kiss you had come from. He did like you, he wouldn’t have agreed to anything more than the film if he didn’t. And he had also had so much fun working with you so far, it was just so easy and such a good vibe that he often forgot that it was “work”. Like tonight, after having a few glasses of wine he was feeling rather touchy and vulnerable, like he usually did when he drank, and it was so nice to feel that relaxed around you. He felt comfortable and it really was just one of those impulsive thoughts that he had. He had thought about kissing you before, you would for the film. But lately it was on his mind a lot more because those scenes would start filming soon. Maybe even in the upcoming week. 
Harry wanted to call Tommy or Jeffrey and tell them what he did but he kew he’d get an earful and he didn’t want that right now. He just needed a little sympathy and possibly another drink. So he called one his more discrete friends as she also lived in Beverly Hills, just about 10 minutes away from you. And they sat out by the fire pit as they sipped on a cocktail. He was petting at her dog’s back while he shared what he’d done and how anxious he was feeling about having to face you at work now. He told her about the PR stunt and how he felt like he’d majorly crossed a line. And when she asked him why he was beating himself over this so much he wasn’t sure what to say. And she helped talk him down and reminded him that if you had said it was OK and you weren’t angry that this was entirely about him.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that you’re making it bigger than it is. I mean…do you like her?”
“Of course I like her. We get along really well and-”
“You know what I mean, H.” She said with a knowing smile and he licked over his lips.
“Yeah, I guess I do a bit. Like starting too but I can’t you know? Last time I got involved with a co-worker it didn’t turn out so great for her. People were cruel.” He said.
“Well this isn’t last time. But I mean, if that’s now a boundary that you really don’t want to test ever again then do what’s going to make you feel better. But I mean, attraction and feelings are sort of out of our hands, you know?” She said with a smile, “And burying those too deep also isn’t good for you.” 
“Yeah.” He sighed.
“Did she kiss back?” 
“No.” He said quietly and she hummed, “I mean, it was fast…maybe she would have…I’m glad I didn’t stick around to find out though.” He admitted.
“So…I think you know how you want to proceed then.” She said and he sighed and nodded.
“Yeah, I guess…I guess I do.” 
He ended up staying the night there as neither of them had anything in the morning. But he headed home after one final pep talk from her, he needed to mentally prepare for seeing you again. He was an absolute wreck over it, his stomach was turning anxiously when he arrived before his call time just to talk to you, you were likely already there in hair and makeup. There was a dinner party scene you guys were filming, it was the scene where his character began to see yours in a different light. Very appropriate. 
“Hey Harry.” One of staffers greeted him as he breezed by.
“Hello!” He waved and then pushed up his glasses further not he bridge of his nose. He hurried over to the hair/makeup trailer. He knocked and heard a cheerful “come in!” From the artist Veronica. Harry stepped inside and as soon as your eyes met through the mirror you looked away quickly and then his eyes met Veronica’s.
“Hey H! I wasn’t expecting you yet!” She said with a smile.
“Just wanted to drop by a bit earlier.” He said and she nodded.
“Well feel free to sit, I’m almost done with Y/n. I’m ahead of schedule.”
“Thanks, ummm, I actually needed a word w-with Y/n.” He said to her, “If I can?” He asked and then glanced to you, to see if that was alright with you. You held his gaze for a second before you nodded.
“It’ll just be a moment, V.” You said to her.
“Maybe like 5-10 minutes.” He said to you and your inhale literally stopped. Your stomach fluttered violently, your heart pounded hard, and your mouth slightly dried.
“Yeah, that’s fine. I’ll go get a drink. Do you guys want anything from the cafe?”
“No thanks, I’m good.”, “No thank you.” You and Harry responded and she smiled and gave him a pat on the arm as she walked past him and out of the trailer. Harry approached and sat in the seat adjacent to yours. You turned to him and he looked sad, defeated.
“Y/n, I’m so fucking sorry.” He apologized again and your eyes flickered down to your lap and you shook your head with a small smile.
“There’s nothing to be sorry about, Harry.” You assured him, “I’m not mad. Quite frankly I’m relieved because…because I…I uh-”
“Please, don’t.” He interrupted and your eyes fluttered up to his as the lump in your throat grew, “I know you what you’re about to say. Please don’t say it.” He implored and you bit down on your lip to hold back from frowning. “It doesn’t work. It won’t.” He said with certainty, “I’ve been there…I’ve fallen in love with a really wonderful person who was working along side me and it messed her up.” He said with a frown. “I can’t do that to anyone ever again.” He explained.
“I get it.” You whispered.
“Believe me, it’s hard. I think we work well together, don’t we. We mesh!”
“Really nicely.” You agreed.
“Yeah.” He confirmed, “So let’s-lets just do what we need to do and call it a day.”
“Okay.” You nodded your head robotically. You just shut down all your feelings because you couldn’t show him how deep in it you were by now. If you could save yourself from anything, at least the embarrassment.
“Does this change anything for you in terms of like the dates-er appearances w-we have to do?” He asked and you shook your head.
“No. Don’t want to make a fuss. Fred is kind of a nag, don’t want him harping and teasing me about it until something more embarrassing or astonishing makes him forget it.” You said.
“Yeah, they can give you a hard time…” he said and you nodded.
“Well uh- actually there is one thing.” You said and he nodded, “T-the opera thing ummm, let’s not do that.” You said and he frowned a bit, “It’s just that when I asked I ummm…I wasn’t asking you to go as an idea for the appearances. This kind of means a lot to me and I was actually asking you to come with me as a friend.” You clarified, “I’d want to go with well…someone who-”
“I get it.” He said with a small smile.
“Thank you.” You nodded.
“Well that’s it I guess.”
“Yeah.” You whispered and he stood and left quite awkwardly.
Once again, he was kicking himself over what he’d just done but it was for the best. He needed to put an end to this before he let himself like you a little too much and it ruined everything. Or worse, he gave in and you guys tried for a bit before things inevitably went to shit because of how awful the public were to you until they wore you down…better safe than sorry. He needed to stop this before it was too late.
***************
You were definitely hurt but you understood where Harry was coming from. And maybe he was right, it was just a bad idea to get involved more than professionally. Admittedly, if you had been in the place of his last girlfriend there was no way you could’ve been as poised as she was through all of it. Through all of the rumors, all of the hate, all of the lies, all of the tasteless jokes… you were confident in yourself but not to that extent, surely you’d have a public breakdown at some point with all of that pressure. 
But as the days went by you realized that you’d soon be filming the more intimate parts of this film. Normally, films didn’t film chronologically but this one did. The director really wanted to capture the natural growing closeness between you and Harry as filming progressed. Truth be told, you were acting your asses off and everyone on the set was buying it even though the bond between you two had broken down. Even your dates were different; you guys weren’t talking as much as before or learning more and more details about each other like before. Now you mostly talked about work to him or your plans after filming but nothing too personal. 
You were still nervous for the intimate scenes though, that’s what you would be doing today, the first intimate scene. You would surely do something to give away just how real your yearning was for him. Your actions couldn’t lie. Especially after you hadn’t been able to kiss back when he’d kissed you a few weeks before.
“Nervous?” Veronica asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, a bit.” You confessed.
“Don’t be. Just work with the natural tension and attraction the two of you already have going on and it’ll be perfect.”
“What do you mean?”
“Girl, you’re really gonna make me say it?” She said with a tsk.
“There’s nothing else going on.” You said and she gave you a disbelieving look.
“What was that a couple weeks ago with the “ten minute talk” he needed to have with you?” She asked you.
“It genuinely was a talk. We had a misunderstanding and I was a little upset at him.” You explained and her gaze softened from teasing and playful to sorry for assuming.
“Oh…I could’ve sworn that you guys-”
“No. No. I mean…I…I like him. Like that.” You said a bit shamefully and she pouted and sat down in the seat beside yours and nodded as she listened, “It’s kind of impossible not to when we spend so much time together and have gotten to know each other the way we have. Like god, it’s so amateur of me…” you shook your head and she sighed.
“Hey, no. Look at me, hon. Attraction is natural, you can’t help how you feel or how your brain responds to something! And quite frankly I think he…likes you too.” She said and you smiled sadly and shook your head.
“He doesn’t, that’s what he said that day. That he didn’t want to blur the lines and like…it’s been so weird since. So dry and robotic…ugh, I hate it so much. I don’t know how I can do this for another eight weeks.” You sighed.
“Well after you have to kiss all day just…act cool. It’s whatever, yeah? I’ve kissed tons of people and not all of it has to mean something, you know?”
“Yeah… I hope I can.”
“You can. You can do it. And i-if you need to talk about it or just be sad about it after you can talk to me. I won’t say a thing. Promise.” She assured you. 
“Thank you.” You said to Veronica and she smiled and nodded.
“Of course, hon.” she assured and this made you feel better. You could certainly get through the next weeks of filming if you had someone to talk to about this.
…. 8 WEEKS LATER ….
The lighting was dim as you approached the front door, the heavy and constant knocks on the door made you hasten your step. You finally opened the door to see Harry drenched from head to toe, clothes clinging to his skin as his eyes met yours.
“What’re you doing here?” You asked, your features creased in confusion as he stepped froward and you stepped back into the entrance.
“I needed to see you.” He said as he swung the front door back and it closed with a heavy thud.
“You just saw me-”
“I didn’t like seeing you with him.” He said coming closer and you sighed.
“Listen-”
“He’s not nearly good enough for you.” He said to you firmly and you scoffed.
“As much as I valued your opinion before, I don’t really care for it right now and I didn’t ask.” You responded.
“You didn’t need to. I know you.” He said as he reached for you and you increased the distance between the two of you.
“No you don’t. Not anymore.” You shook your head as your eyes started to well up.
“Don’t say that.” He frowned, the hurt evident on his face, “You’re my best friend. I know you.” He insisted again and you let out a sarcastic laugh.
“We haven’t spoken since…” you trailed off and swallowed thickly.
“Since I let you walk away.” He finished your thought for you and you nodded. “I was scared.” He admitted.
“You weren’t scared with April or Sarah.” You said and he sighed.
“They weren’t you. There was more to lose with you.” He explained and you shook your head.
“That’s a miserable excuse. You always do this!” You groaned with frustration, “You see that I’ve moved on, that I’m happy and then you come to me and make me believe you-”
“I know you’re not happy.” He interrupted.
“I’m happier than when I’m playing this stupid game with you!” You raised your voice, your breathing shallow as you expressed your frustration and he frowned. “You say you love me and fuck me and then say we can’t be together!”
“Can’t you see how that proves how much I love you?” He asked sincerely, his eyes meeting yours and you glanced away and shook your head, “I’ve loved you this whole time but I can’t risk losing my best friend.” He said and you sniffled as your tears started to fall.
“You don’t love me.” You rejected his claim, “You love who I’ve been for you. Always available, desperate for you to realize that I’ve been here the whole time, but I’m not that person anymore. I don’t need you any more.” You said and he frowned, “You don’t know what’s it been like…” you said to him with a sad smile, “Being here. Waiting. Watching you choose someone else over and over again and when it fails you come running back to me. But I’ve realized that if I wasn’t good enough to be your first or second choice, surely I’m not enough for you now. And I never will be.” You said to him, your voice cracked a bit.
“You are enough. You’re more than! I just wasn’t good enough for you. I didn’t want to hurt you and lose you.” He explained reaching for your hands and you pulled them out of his grip.
“Well, you hurt me any way. And you lost me anyway. And now that you know you’ve lost me you hate to see it. Well good.” You seethed and he frowned.
“Baby-”
“Don’t. Don’t start with that.” You warned with a frown, “I don’t believe you anymore. I gave my heart over to you every time, like an idiot, thinking that I’d be safe with you and every single time you’ve disappointed me! Well, not anymore.” You said and he reached for you again. “Please leave.”
“I’m not leaving until you tell me that you love me too.” He pressed and you scoffed.
“You need to move on!” You laughed incredulously.
“I can’t! Believe me, I’ve tried!” He raised his voice, his breathing hard, “I’m sorry that I’ve hurt you and that I’ve disappointed you but I’m not afraid anymore.” He said reaching for your hands once more and this time you let him take them, “I’m not afraid of the love we have for each other. I will do anything I can to prove to you that it’ll be different this time. That I won’t disappoint you ever again.” He said earnestly, “Please.” He begged and you swallowed thickly. “I need you like I need air! Being away from you has been torture. And seeing you with someone else has been worse than torture.” He said grabbing your jaw and angling you up gently. His thumb wiped your tears away carefully and you closed your eyes, “Nuh-uh, look at me.” He insisted and your eyes blinked open and met his again. “Say it. Say that you love me, baby. I need to hear you say it.” He practically begged as he leaned in closer.
“I love you.” You whispered and he quickly closed the gap between you. 
His warm, plump lips met your own hungrily. The soft wet sounds of your kisses and shallow breaths were  the only noises in the background, everything was perfectly still otherwise and it really felt like you two were the only people in the world in this moment. You were so close his sopping clothes were transferring the wetness to your own top and his strong hands were holding you low on your hips now, you could feel the cold of them through the thin sleep shorts you were in. “I love you, I do.” You mumbled against his lips and then pulled back and he chased after you but you turned your head to the side and squeezed your eyes shut as he kissed the corner of your mouth and up your jaw, “But I love me more.” You said as you pushed him back and he loosened his grip on you as he pulled back to look at you, his disappointment evident in his gaze, his eyes searching yours. “I’m more than a last resort.” You said and he frowned, “I always chose you and you never chose me, so I’m choosing myself over you this time.” You said and he looked at you with disappointment.
“Cara-”
“You’re going to be okay.” You assured him and he shook his head.
“What a silly thing to say.” He whispered with doubt, a sad smile on his lips.
“If I am after everything, you will be too.” You assured him with a half smile and he let you go.
“I’m sorry.” He apologized quite pitifully and you nodded.
“I know.” You said once more and he rolled his lips together and nodded before silently turning around and heading out the door. You walked over and turned the lock and then turned around and let out a long exhale and then your lips turned up in a small, but sincere smile as you glanced up to the ceiling and made direct eye contact with the camera peering down at you.
“CUT!” The director shouted and you exhaled and your smile widened, “And that’s a wrap!” She shouted and everyone broke out in a cheer. She rushed over and hugged you tight, praising you for how excellent this final scene was. Harry came over as well and got his own hug from her, thanking him for his delivery and congratulating him on a job well done. You also gave him a brief hug before greeting others from the cast.
All the raw emotions of the project being completed really helped you guys along this final scene. It had been one of those magical moments where the first take went perfectly. You guys ran through the entire dialogue and it worked exactly as everyone had envisioned it. Truly, you hardly even noticed the cameras around you guys. The film would be released on Prime in three short months, which was when your contractual obligation to each other would end. Your appearances together were going to be far more “private” now that filming was about to wrap. Sure, you’d be seen out at places together, but it was supposed to start to slow down. You had prepared what you would say when someone inevitably asked you what was going on between you two during the promo tour and press junkets. That you guys got really close to the characters and also each other during filming and just let these bleed together while filming and that obviously, it had started to cool down since you weren’t seeing each other every single day for 10 to 11 of the 24 hours the day had. 
“We did it.” Harry said as he came up to you as you guys got ready to go and you nodded.
“Yeah. It’s crazy that it’s already done.” You chuckled, still a little bit in shock and he nodded.
“Right…well I did have fun filming with you.” 
“Same.” You said with a small smile and he nodded.
“Are you going to the cast dinner tomorrow?”
“Of course, I’m in the cast…” You said through a chuckle.
“Duh…” he said nervously as he looked down at his feet in a bit of embarrassment.
“Well I’ll see you tomorrow then?”
“Yeah.” You confirmed and turned to get into your car and just offered one final wave before you took off. 
You glanced back to see him still standing there, watching you go. You were glad your windows were tinted so that he couldn’t see you staring back, but you just weren’t sure what to feel. As much as you were into him, you were dreading the rest of your time “together”. Clearly to him this was just like any other task he had for work, maybe he was used to this but you weren’t. You’d never done anything like this before and you kind of expected him to be a little more understanding and not so harsh and cold about it like he had been with you.
…. TWO MONTHS LATER ….
Harry wasn’t that clueless, he noticed the shift in your interactions with him after filming ended. Almost as if you were relieved that you wouldn’t have to see each other every single day for hours and hours at a time. He knew that you liked him and he wished he had handled that differently because clearly the way he went about it hurt your feelings to the extent that you’d gone completely cold on him.
When you’d go out and he’d grab your hand it was dead weight in his grip. When he’d drape his arm around your shoulder he could feel the tension in them. And when you’d exchange “loving glances” your smile didn’t light up your eyes like before. Maybe it was just what you needed to do to get through the last month of this stunt but it was just going bad now. He wanted to apologize but he had no idea what he even needed to apologize for because he wasn’t sorry about the conversation he’d had with you.
You guys needed to tighten things up at the personal level, clearly he got far too comfortable with you fast and it scared him. He didn’t want to get hurt again and he didn’t want to hurt you either. He’d done this to protect you both from getting far more involved than necessary and now he felt like even the potential friendship he could have with you was crumbling before him which was really unfortunate. 
He was feeling bummed out as he drove past your tall, wooden gate and up the long driveway to your house. He saw another car there but didn’t really mind it as he parked somewhere out of its way. He was getting out of his car when the front door opened and out rushed some guy who definitely looked familiar, probably some other industry guy. His hair was wet and he looked a bit surprised to see Harry there, so he rushed to his car.
“Hey!” He called after him and hurried towards him.
“Look man, she said you guys aren’t dating and-”
“Wait, she slept with you?” Harry asked with a small frown.
“So you are dating?” He asked and Harry shook his head ‘no’, “Thank, fuck. Then, yes, we did.” He said and Harry nodded and swallowed thickly.
“Is she- can I go in?”
“Yeah, she’s just finishing up her shower.” He said and Harry nodded.
“Thanks, mate.” He mumbled before heading towards the door. 
With every step he took the anger rose and rose further and further. You were being reckless, putting everything in jeopardy all to what? Get back at him for not liking you back? He was waiting in the kitchen, but when he heard you singing along to whatever was playing on your phone as you made your way down he hurried out to meet you. When he rounded the corner and saw you coming down the final step you gasped in surprise.
“Oh my god, Harry!” You scolded with a hand over your chest as you put your music on pause. He didn’t answer so you walked past him, “You’re here a lot early.” You said to him playfully as he followed you wordlessly. He was just so fuming mad after seeing a faint hickey right beneath your jaw, “Hello?” You questioned him until his frustrated gaze met yours.
“What the fuck is the matter with you?” He questioned you.
“What’re you talking about?”
“I saw him leaving. That guy.” He came right out and said it.
“Look, it was a spur of the moment thing, we were just having dinner and one thing led to another and-”
“You fucked him.” He said and you sighed. “How could you do that?” He asked you in disbelief.
“What do you mean? It’s not like we’re actually together.” You scoffed and he frowned but then let the anger overcome him once more.
“Exactly! We’re not together and if anyone sees some stupid dweeb leaving your house then all of this is going to be for nothing!” He rationalized.
“Oh my god, no one’s gonna see anything, Harry…”
“They might see that fucking hickey on your neck!” He argued, “How clueless can you be?!” He was berating you now, his voice raised and his expression creased in a scowl and you frowned.
“I didn’t think about that. I mean, I-I can cover it. If not, they’ll just think it was you.” You said more quietly.
“No one would ever believe that was me. I have never left visible marks on anyone I’ve been with. My fans will never buy it.” He said pointedly. “You can’t do shit with other people while we are contractually obligated to each other. It doesn’t take a genius to figure that out, Y/N!”
“Well, there is no clause about that! And I was careful!”
“Not careful enough! I can’t believe you would do something so stupid and all for what? To get back at me?” He scoffed with an accusatory tone and now it was your turn to scoff incredulously.
“Oh, don’t fucking flatter yourself, Harry!” You laughed mawkishly as you rolled your eyes up in disbelief.
“Don’t pretend like you didn’t do this on purpose to piss me off.” 
“Why would I want to piss you off if I have to spend a whole fucking day with you?” You asked him and well, he had no idea. “He likes me and he wanted to have dinner with me. I said I couldn’t do that out in public so I offered for him to come over instead.”
“He doesn’t like you, he just wanted to fuck you.” Harry said with a sarcastic smile.
“Well good for him then! He did!”
“You’re being childish.”
“I’m being childish? You’re the one waltzing in here over an hour early, might I add, yelling at me because I hooked up with someone in the privacy of my home when we’re not even a thing!”
“I already told you why I’m angry at you over this.”
“Well I already told you that I was careful! This is my first time doing something like this and I made a bad judgment call. I genuinely didn’t think it would be a problem.” You said and he shook his head. 
“You knew it would be. You did it to get back at me for…never mind.” He huffed and rolled his eyes.
“For what? Finish the sentence, Harry.” You demanded.
“You know why.” He said lowly and you arched your eyebrows up.
“I don’t. Enlighten me, please.” You insisted.
“Because of what I said to you before about us. I hurt your feelings and-”
“Yeah, you were kind of a prick about it but I’m not offended. You were right about that and I think I’ve done enough to manage what I used to feel for you-”
“Used to feel? The wave of hostility you’ve unleashed upon me after I rejected you says otherwise. And I think you’re just acting out because you can’t get a handle on your feelings. You’re being impulsive and it’s going to throw a wrench in things!”
“I’m being impulsive? Who kissed who, Harry? I’m forgetting…” You said sarcastically and he glanced to the ground.
“That was a mistake.”
“Yeah, you’ve made that abundantly clear over and over again, thanks.” You said with irritation. “And I’m not being hostile. I’m doing what I need to do until we just get this stupid thing over with!” You said to him, completely exasperated, “I’ve never done this before, OK? I didn’t expect t-to like you like I do-er did.” You corrected yourself with a shake of your head, “I’m sure it was weird for you the first time you did it.” You said and his jaw clenched up because you were right. 
His first PR stunt fucked him up for a while…he was still a teenager, frontal lobe smooth as butter. But he let himself fall and he thought she was too and well, to this day he was still a hot topic amongst her projects. It did bother him a little bit at first, he reckoned it’d bother anyone but he didn’t give it the satisfaction of a negative response ever. He changed the narrative, called it a compliment even though he had no idea where the fuck he was going with that at the moment. He never said a bad thing even through his music even though he’d been painted as the “bad guy” who was a player and couldn’t commit over and over again. He’d hoped it would work out but to anyone outside of it, it was kind of obvious that it wouldn’t go anywhere. After all, what could a 23 year old want with a 18 year old in any serious manner? The point being, that these PR stunts and crossing professional lines always left one or both people hurting if they weren’t overly cautious, which is why he had said what he had said to you. 
But now he was jealous, gut wrenchingly jealous when he shouldn’t be. You had made a mistake but you had been cautious to not endanger what you guys had signed on for. He was being far too harsh with you and sensitive about this and he needed to reel it back in. You were waiting for him to say something, anything…
“You shouldn’t have done that. It was a stupid mistake.” He said again and you swallowed thickly.
“Yeah, I get it.” You responded lowly.
“Do you?” He asked. He was patronizing you and you glanced up to the ceiling and shook your head.
“Harry, honestly, I don’t need this. Please leave.” You said to him and he frowned.
“But we-”
“I don’t want to be with you for the whole fucking day and pretend that I like you.” You said and he felt his heart shrivel up.
“We have an obligation to do an appearance-”
“Well I’ll see you around dinner time then because I don’t want to be around you right now.” You said to him and he bit on the inside of his cheek to distract from the hurt in his heart.
“Yeah, alright.” He said lowly and turned around to leave.
“Congrats by the way.” You said to him and he sighed and looked back at you quizzically, “You got what you wanted this whole time, I don’t think I like you anymore.” You said to him callously and he suddenly wanted to throw up so he just hurried out of there and sat in his car in utter silence for a few minutes before taking off.
You guys did meet over dinner and he apologized for how he’d handled the whole situation earlier that day. You'd cooled off enough as well and apologized for not considering what he had mentioned and assured him that you wouldn’t do it again while you were contractually obligated to each other. He was hoping to hear you say that you didn’t mean what you’d said about not liking him anymore, but he never got the satisfaction. He was certain you’d spoken purely out of anger with him, especially after he’d been such a dick about it, but maybe you just needed to tell yourself that to really not let your feelings grow anymore than they had or even to just not have some illusion that he was jealous. Which he was, but he’d never admit that to you or anyone else, he hardly admitted it to himself. But by the end of the night you were both very cordial with each other and able to hug before heading your own ways.
…. FOUR MONTHS LATER ….
The film had been a success to say the least. It was getting decent reviews and your press for it had been good. After you and Harry had put aside your problems after your fight things got monumentally better. There were tons of questions about whether you guys were dating or not and you both explained your attraction and dedication to your roles expertly, leaving a hint of mystery behind every time this came up, in very Harry-esque nature. But each night before you went to bed in whatever city you were for the night you thought of Harry, how could you not?
Of course you still liked him, even now, after months of not seeing each other your heart went all soft and gooey at the thought of him. Yeah, you had said that you didn’t like him anymore hoping to get a reaction out of him when you fought. You knew that he was jealous that day and you wanted him to just admit it, you wanted to get a rise out of him and hope he spoke up but in his true obstinate nature, he never did. You wondered what would’ve happened if he had admitted it. Where would you be now? Probably on a vacation somewhere really getting to know the parts of each other that you’d left guarded, which admittedly weren’t many.
“Earth to Y/N…” your friend said, snapping you out of your thoughts and you chuckled in slight embarrassment.
“Sorry, what?” You asked.
“I asked if you and Harry still talk.” She repeated her question.
“Oh right…ummm, n-not really. It’s not like we’re close friends, we just worked together. We just had to be super chummy during the press tours and stuff. Like it was a really superficial friendship I’d say.” You fibbed and she sighed.
“So no free shows for us…” She mumbled and you smiled a bit and shrugged apologetically, “You had one job.” She joked and you giggled before getting back to eat and everyone else started talking again. 
In reality, you and Harry had gotten close after spending so much time together. You’d shared a lot of things with him and vise versa. He had been a little more hesitant to take it there but after a good month or so of constantly being around each other and “seeing each other” he started to open up about more real and deep things. Things like how much he worried about his mom, how she deserved to be happy and have a full life full of love. How he was worried that he’d never be able to really stop making music and touring at the level he did now and it would affect his ability to marry and have his own family. How he wished there was a way to know that you were doing the right thing or going down the best path and you guys talked about that a lot. About what “the right thing” was. About what it meant to be happy and fulfilled. What was most important to him now and could he afford to keep pushing the rest of his life back to relish where he was now.
You were an over thinker, much like him, and you guys talked about how nice it was when you didn’t worry so much and just lived day to day, focusing on that day’s challenges and blessings. It was nice, you felt comfortable around him and safe, looked after. He was good at making people feel seen and special and with all of that it was hard not to start to fall for him. You missed him a lot. You wanted to text him or call him sometimes just to see how he was doing, what he was up to, if by any chance he missed you too…When you had that thought you smiled to yourself a bit and talked yourself out of it. Of course he didn’t miss you, he was probably glad you were gone, something less for him to deal with and worry about.
****************
Harry’s POV
Harry had been lying in bed for a good hour already, drifting in and out of sleep. He canceled his work out and his morning swim, he didn’t have the energy to go to that right now. And that’s how he knew that he was in a bad way, when even those simple pleasures weren’t even a little appealing to him. In all honesty, he’d been feeling like this for a few weeks now and it all started when he was at dinner with some friends and one of your songs came over the speakers at the restaurant. At first it felt good to hear your voice, it made him feel happy and warm inside, but when he was at home later that night and all alone in his bed he started to miss you. And he felt so awful. 
He felt awful about how he’d handled his attraction towards you. He hated how afraid he was of doing what his heart asked him to. He missed going on “dates” with you. He missed the conversations you guys had, he missed seeing the sincere care in your eyes when he shared things or opened up about topics he felt nervous about. He was never judged by you, in fact he felt accepted with you. He looked forward to the time you’d spend together off the set for a reason, it was because he liked you. A lot. And now he felt foolish for being too scared to admit it when he had the chance. He was sad when he came to the realization that you’d probably moved on and closed off your heart to him after how he behaved.
Regardless, he wanted to see you or at the very least to hear your voice. He at least needed to reach out and let you know that he was thinking of you. He did have a trip to LA in a few weeks and he decided that he’d reach out and see if you wanted to hang out for a bit, he only had two days of work things to take care of but he could add a few more days to his travel plans if it meant making things right with you.
…. A FEW WEEKS LATER ….
You were genuinely shocked when Harry’s name lit up your phone screen one breezy afternoon. It was past midnight his time so you had a mind to just ignore it, he was probably drunk or something…but then you remembered how sweet and giggly he was when he’d had a little much to drink, so you swiped at your screen and brought your phone up to your ear.
“Hello?” 
“Hey!” He sounded relieved. Relieved that you had answered?
“Ummm…are you drunk?” You asked immediately and he huffed out a little chuckle.
“No…why would I be drunk at this hour?” He asked and you furrowed your eyebrows a little bit in confusion.
“Well you’re calling me past midnight your time so I just assumed. Unless something is wrong? Are you okay?” You asked next.
“Yeah, I’m fine. And I’m actually on your time. And while I enjoy day drinking as much as the next person I can assure you I am not drunk. I just ummm…I wanted to see if you had any free time in the next couple days or so? Maybe we could see each other?” He suggested hopefully and you felt your stomach sink. 
The less mature part of you wanted to be a smart ass with him, tell him you didn’t need to hang out as your contract was long over. But you did miss him and as much as his invitation raised up some of your past irritations with him it wasn’t worth being a bitch to him over, especially after all of that time. Maybe this was him extending an olive branch? Maybe you guys could be proper friends now that your working relationship was over.
“Ummm, yeah. I actually don’t have any plans at all the next few days.” You explained.
“And work?”
“I’m not doing anything right now just relishing in the big bucks from our hit rom-com.” You said with a dry sarcasm and he chuckled.
“God, already letting all that fame get to your head, are you?” He teased and you giggled.
“Yeah, I’m changed.” You responded and he laughed. “Well, what did you have in mind?” You asked.
“Dinner? I’m renting this really beautiful place up in the hills and it has the most impeccable views, you’d love it. There’s a hot tub and a pool and a piano, we could just hang out here for a while? Or if you prefer to do something in town somewhere we could do that too.”
“Well I do want to see this house you’re staying at but ummm, I don’t want to impose or anything and-”
“I’m inviting you over, you’re not imposing in any way, love.” He assured.
“Alright then. Well when do you prefer I come over?”
“Do you want to do tomorrow? Say around 3 or 4?” He asked and you bit on your lip, “We could talk, swim, share music because I’m certain you’ve been writing.” He said knowingly and you smiled.
“Yeah, that’s good. I’ll show up sometime between 3 and 4, gotta keep you on your toes, you know?”
“Yeah.” He hummed, “So bring your swim suit, or don’t I mean, either way you can expect to get in the water…” he said suggestively and you chuckled.
“Should I bring anything else?”
“No just yourself.” He said and you nodded, “We can plan dinner once you’re here.”
“Alright, sounds good. See ya’.” 
“See you soon.” He replied and then you quickly hung up.
You set your phone down on your lap and just let your face contort in confusion. What was that all about? You guys weren’t even friends… sure, things were this easy with him all the time but you couldn’t help but question his motives. Maybe he still felt guilty for how things transpired between the two of you and he just needed to do this to confirm that you weren’t upset at him. You grabbed your phone and called him back, he picked up right away.
“Hello?”
“Why are you doing this?” You asked.
“Wait, what?” He questioned you and you sighed.
“What do you want from me by asking me over to hang out or whatever?” You asked more clearly and Harry frowned upon hearing you asking this.
“Ummm, I didn’t…mean anything by it, it’s just hanging out.” He said and you sighed.
“Right, but we’re not friends.” You said and his heart lurched in his chest, “Now that we aren’t working together we can be or what?” You asked for clarity.
“I mean, yes, i-if you want that?” He said with a questioning tone.
“Okay…” you said and trailed off.
“Is there something wrong with that?” He asked and you weren’t sure how to answer that.
“I just ummm…I don’t know if I can trust that you won’t get all…weird.” You said to him.
“That’s valid.”
“I mean we were friends before. Or at least I considered us t-to have a friendship to some extent and then you just…took that away.” You explained and he nodded with a frown as he heard you out.
“I think we were friends too.” He agreed, “I just have a hard time letting people in.”
“And now you don’t?” You asked.
“No, I certainly do but I…” he sighed and licked over his lips as he plopped down on the couch as he stared at the ceiling as he decided to just admit it, “I miss you.” He confessed and you bit your lip upon hearing his words. You hoped it would stop the butterflies that were starting to flutter about in your tummy but it wasn’t doing much. “Honestly Y/N, I don’t think I handled the relationship between us the right way and-”
“Can I come over right now?” You interrupted him.
“Ummm, y-yes. Sure.” He said nervously.
“I just think we ought to have this conversation in person.” You explained and he smiled a bit. God, you had to make it harder for him, didn’t you?
“You’re right.” He conceded. “I’ll send you the address right now.”
“Should I still bring a swim suit?” You asked, he could heard the smirk on your face and he chuckled. Your smiled widened at your successful attempt to lighten the mood.
“We can talk things out in the hot tub.” He joked.
“I’ll see you in a little bit.”
“Yeah, drive safe.” He said and you thanked him and hung up again.
You headed up to your room and grabbed a bathing suit, a simple, paisley print, two-piece and dropped it into your tote and then took off. You were nervous, not so much about what he would say but at the prospect of you leaving with any sense of false hope. Yeah, he missed you, but that didn’t really mean anything but that. You couldn’t or shouldn’t read into that in any way. When you were all in your head like this time just escaped you and soon enough you were pulling up to the gate and putting in the code he had texted you before you started heading up the driveway. You only waited a few moments at the door after ringing the doorbell before he opened it up. 
“Hi.” He said softly with a smile on his face and you smiled back.
“Hey.” You responded, you just looked at each other for a few moments before he chuckled and moved out of the way.
“Oh, come in. Please.” He said and allowed you to step inside. You looked around as he locked up. The home was very modern, an open concept type of thing and it had one of those sunken living rooms that were making a come back. 
“This is cool.” You complimented.
“Yeah, I like it a lot.” He said as he came up beside you and looked out at the space. “Ummm, can I get you something to drink? Or a snack if you’re hungry? I have…watermelon.” He said and you smiled.
“No thanks, I’m alright.” You assured him and he nodded and just looked over you for a few more moments. It made you feel all tingly so you cleared your throat and he looked down at the ground.
“Ummm so let’s just…we can sit over here and talk.” He said signaling towards the living room and you nodded and followed him down the small set of steps leading down to the couches. “Feel free to get comfy wherever.”
“Thanks.” You said as you headed towards one of the corners of the large sectional and slipped off your shoes before you nestled in, legs criss-crossed over each other as you pulled a pillow into your lap. Harry settled in near you, one of his legs tucked under him and the other hanging off of the couch. He looked a bit pensive, not entirely sure how or where to start and you were getting a little impatient.
“So you…missed me.” You said simply and he glanced into you eyes and nodded.
“Yeah, I have been for…a while.” He confirmed and you sighed.
“I have too…a little bit.” You admitted as you looked down into your lap and he smiled.
“It’s nothing to be ashamed of, we did spend a lot of time together so…”
“Yeah, true.” You sighed.
“So ummm, what I was saying before…” he started and you nodded, “I didn’t go about things the right way with you. I could’ve been…”
“Less of a dick?” You interjected and he smiled down at his lap, when he looked up at you, you were already smiling.
“I was going to say nicer about it but same thing, I guess.” He chuckled and you did as well. “I’ve been thinking about it a lot and while my reasons for it were really valid, I think, it doesn’t mean that I handled it well and I…regret hurting your feelings. I’m sorry.” He said and you hummed.
“Thank you. I just…was -er still am a bit confused about that because, I mean, I told you that I’d never done something like this before and I don’t know…I guess I was just expecting you to be a little bit more understanding or even just compassionate with me about the whole thing, you know?” You explained and he nodded.
“I wish I had been. I really do.” He said with a small frown. “I can explain actually.” He said and you nodded, “And this is not an excuse at all, it’s just that, an explanation.” He added and you nodded again, “When I kissed you I…I realized how much I was starting to like you and it scared me.” He explained, “And it took me back to what I’d been through before and I didn’t want that again, not for me, but especially not for you.” He explained, “So I decided that I wasn’t going to allow my feelings for you to grow any more or go any further than that.” He said and your gaze on him softened, “And well, i-it worked well enough for a bit. It was easier when we were working to remind myself that it was for the best. And then we fought and you told me you didn’t like me anymore and I felt like shit but I was also glad because you deserved better than that.” He said with a frown. “But when we went our own ways it got worse…not worse, you know what I mean.” He said nervously, “I just thought about you all the time- er I have been thinking about you this whole time. Just wondering i-if you think about me too sometimes…I mean, I know that you don’t feel that way about me any more but-”
“I do.” You cut in and he looked surprised.
“After all of that?” He asked softly and you nodded.
“You more than made up for it on the press tour.” You assured him, “I just didn’t want to make you uncomfortable or upset you so I buried it all but I still like you. I mean, how could I not?” You chuckled and he smiled at you. “And I’m sorry for the way I said I didn’t, I wanted to make you upset.” You explained.
“Well it worked.” He chuckled and you smiled sadly. “I kind of deserved it though.” He said, “You didn’t ummm…see that guy again did you?” He asked and you smiled.
“I didn’t.” You confirmed and he smiled down at his lap.
“Good.” He mumbled lowly and you just smiled to yourself for a moment, “I really like you, Y/N.” He finally said as his gaze met your own. “And i-if you still like me too then maybe we can try and go an actual date.” He said with hope and you nodded.
“I’d like that.” You agreed and he smiled wider.
“Okay, that’s…that’s good to hear.” He chuckled nervously, “So tomorrow d-do you want to go out and do something with me? I’ve got something in mind.”
“Why not tonight?” You asked with a small pout and he chuckled.
“Because I’d like to make it at least a little bit nice.” He added and you smiled.
“Oh okay, then. That’s fine with me!” You giggled and he chuckled. “I brought my bathing suit so maybe we can go for a swim and have dinner instead, like we planned for tomorrow?”
“Yeah, sounds good.” He agreed easily and you both got changed and then got into the pool where you caught up on how the last few months had been treating you both so far. 
Then, you had dinner and watched a film and he reached for your hand while you guys watched. You’d held hands before but now you at least knew it was out of a desire to and not obligation it made the butterflies in your stomach swarm at ungodly rates. As the night wrapped up he walked you out to your car, like the sweet man you knew him to be but it was hard to leave. You guys lingered there, finding random little things to talk about to prevent saying goodbye.
“Thank you for hearing me out, by the way.” He said to you after another small moment of silence and you smiled up at him as you leaned on your car and smiled at him. “You didn’t have to after everything.”
“Of course. I’m really glad you reached out to me.” You assured him and he nodded and pulled you in for a hug for maybe the third time now and you nestled into him and sighed, “I really missed you too.” You hummed softly and he pulled back a little bit, enough to be able to look into your eyes again. Neither of you wanted to let go more than that.
“Can I kiss you?”
“Yes.” You said instantly, “Please.” You chuckled and he did as well as he angled up your face gently by your jaw until he was dipping down enough to smoosh his lips against yours. 
He was tentative, he didn’t want to kiss you too hard and hungrily for the first time since the time he’d mucked it up. He wanted you to feel how much he missed you and that despite his previous disrespects, that he in fact did respect you and your time and openness towards him. His fingers skimming along your jaw caused your skin to rise with goosebumps and for a delicious shiver to zing throughout your body. You wanted to lose your cool and just let things get fiery with the tension that simmered between you but he was being so patient himself that it staved off your desperation. You wanted to enjoy how soft and tender he was being right now. You liked how his feelings were emanating from him in intense waves and warming you from the inside out. Finally, he pulled away, it was painful and almost impossible to let him end the kiss.
“I’ll see you tomorrow?” He whispered between the two of you and you nodded.
“Yeah.”
“I’ll pick you up around 7.” He informed and you nodded.
“Okay.” You whispered and he pulled you off to the side before opening your car door, “Thanks.”
“Of course.” He smiled and you bit your lip for a moment.
“One for the road?” You asked timidly and he grinned grabbed your face before pecking your lips once more.
“There you are. Now leave while I have the self-control to let you go.” He mumbled between you two and you laughed before settling into your seat and he closed the door behind you. You buckled up and got the engine on and he backed up, giving you room to get going and with a final wave you headed home. You weren’t driving fast at all but it felt like you were flying. You couldn’t stop smiling, even as you settled into bed and stared at the dark ceiling you were wearing a huge smile until you fell asleep.
***************
You’d been on edge all day wondering what it was that he would plan for you two. When you texted to ask what you should wear he said he was going for a semi-casual look, button down with a vest and trousers sort of thing so you decided on going for a similar vibe. You spent hours trying on a variety of combinations and in the end you settled on a black mini skirt with a creme colored, sleeveless knit top. You searched around for your chunky loafers and decided those paired best with the outfit as well. You had blown out your hair that morning so you got it into rollers and threw on a shower cap before you got in and exfoliated your body religiously. You knew your wax girl would kill you, but you ran a razor over your legs to get rid of the slightly prickly layer of hair growing in. You moisturized efficiently and then spritz yourself   with your current preferred fragrance, Brit for Her by Burberry. 
You had taken a fondness to the scent recently because it reminded you of him. Not that he even smelled like that but just vibe of it made you think of who he was. The prominent or top notes were sweet and fruity. They were bright and intriguing but not overpowering like some fruity perfumes could be. These blended so well with the warmer, darker base notes of  vanilla, amber, and mahogany. It created an alluring and irresistible blend of fragrances that seemed to perfectly encompass the feeling he gave you of comfort and warmth and excitement. You wanted it to linger and be memorable, the way he lingered and was memorable to you. Truly, you had no idea where this with him would go or if it would even work out, but you knew he was the kind of person who would leave a mark on you forever.
When you got his call that he was outside you grabbed you gave yourself one more spritz, grabbed your purse, and got into your shoes before hurrying out. He was waiting outside of the car for you, his smiled widened when you saw you going down the steps.
“You look lovely.” He complimented as you approached and you smiled timidly until you got up to him. 
“Thank you.” You hummed softly and he pulled you in for a hug and he froze for a second when you hugged him back.
“Fuck…you smell so good.” He hummed against you and you smirked victoriously as he squeezed around you a bit more. “Damn.” He mumbled as he dipped down to kiss right under your jaw and inhale the sweet scent. You giggled as his little bit of stubble lightly tickled your skin as he nuzzled closer.
“Stop that…” You laughed as he nipped at your skin.
“I can’t.” He huffed before kissing up to your lips and pecking over them a few times and pulling away with his lip bitten beneath his teeth.
“Please take me on a date.” You said softly and he smiled.
“Yeah alright.” He agreed with a grin and you giggled as he opened up the door for you. You greeted your driver and settled in as he hurried over to his side and soon enough you were on the road.
“So where are we going?” You asked as your fingers fiddled together and he smiled.
“You’ll see…” he said smugly and you chuckled. You both hummed along to the radio as you tried to figure out where it was you were heading but you seemed to be going in almost a circle as you started heading back towards where your house was. Then you guys turned down a street and you immediate recognized the area and saw the wine bar you guys had been to before just down the way.
“Are we going back to the wine bar?” You asked him and he immediately smiled as you started to slow down before it.
“I desperately need a do over.” He said to you and you smiled, “Things should’ve gone a lot differently than they did that night. So we’re doing it again, correctly this time.” He said with a smile as the car stopped at the valet station up front.
“You’re too sweet.” You said softly and he smiled. 
You were soon helped out of the car by the attendant as Harry met you on the sidewalk and you thanked the driver and valet before looping your arms together and heading inside. He gave his name to the young lady at the entrance and she kept her cool as she guided you on back to where you sat the last time you were there. Of course, people were looking but he didn’t seem to mind and soon you were tucked into the back of the bar, mostly covered from everyone’s curious gazes and just smiling at each other across the small table. You guys ordered your first glass and then got to playing Jenga; this one had questions pasted onto the sides of the blocks so you guys went through the tower, giving your responses and discussing these until you toppled it over. You couldn’t help it, your hands were shaky with nerves but also with excitement. He looked so handsome, it was almost painful not to look at him. Soon enough, two glasses turned to four, and you were both giggly and reminiscing your filming days fondly. He had been telling a story about a little mishap he had with one of the modesty garments for one of his scenes with another actress and you two were laughing so hard.
“Wait, wait, wait, I need to go to the bathroom so bad!” You laughed breathily and he chuckled as he let your hand go over the top of the table.
“Yeah, love you go on. Do you want me to order you another?” He asked and you nodded as you hopped down from the high stool.
“Please.” you confirmed as you came around. You were half expecting it when he pulled you in by the waist and nuzzled against your neck again.
  “You were too far away.” He hummed as he nipped under your jaw for a second as his big, warm palm nearly caressed down your bottom and you smiled.
“Behave.” You reprimanded playfully and he pulled back to meet your eyes.
“I am.” He assured you and you smiled. “Now go.”
“That requires letting me go.”
“I know…” he said and released you with some reluctance. He watched as you walked off, hips swaying hypnotically as you headed off. 
Yeah, you needed to use the bathroom but you also needed a break from the intensity of Harry’s gaze on you. It was intense before, but now that you knew he was also into you it felt overwhelming. This entire time he found a way to graze his fingertips against yours, to knock his foot into yours, to make you aware of the minimal space between the two of you as much as possible. As if you needed a reminder of how badly you wanted him in the first place. The more you drank the deeper his voice got and the more intense the tingles got when he spoke to you, you swore you felt the vibrations of his low drawn baritone at your core, rippling out to the rest of your body with each word. Lust didn’t begin to cover what you felt for him. Even as you sat there for a moment relieving yourself you could hear some other ladies in the bathroom talking about just how good he looked tonight and how demanding and intense his energy was. How it was practically impossible not to feel him in the space. When you opened up the stall door the girls talking about it froze and watched you for a second.
“You’re not wrong.” You said to them with a small smile and they looked relieved at how relaxed you were towards them. “Please don’t tell anyone that. I just needed to get it off my chest.” You chuckled bashfully as you washed your hands.
“No girl, your secret is safe with us.” One of them assured with a kind smile.
“You guys kissed in that movie a bunch of times, how are you still alive?” One of them asked and you chuckled.
“It was hard for sure…” you confirmed, “What was worse was how sweet he is…It makes it so hard not to take it to heart.” You explained and they hummed. 
“You look so cute by the way. Could we get a picture?” One of them asked and you smiled.
“Ummm sure!” You giggled and they hurried over. The first pic was a failure, you all laughed at your half closed eyes, “Sorry, I’m so fucking tipsy!” You giggled and on the third try you managed to keep your eyes open wide enough to appear normal.
“I wish we could get one with Harry too.” One of the girls said.
“Well, if you guys leave at the same time as we do I can try and talk him into it.” You offered and they gushed and thanked you and assured you they’d keep an eye out for this. 
They were so sweet to you, assuring you that you looked exquisite and giving you the confidence boost you really needed to flirt up a storm with Harry. He’d been so attentive and you’d been quite cool about it, but you were ready to reciprocate and show him just how much you wanted him too. When you made your way out of the bathroom it was with a new found confidence thanks to your bathroom besties. You were walking a little taller and with a little more sway as you headed back to your table. 
As you made it back to your secluded little section you saw that Harry had settled into the stool beside yours. He was initially looking at the drinks menu but then he glanced up and right into your eyes, almost as if he sensed you coming. When your eyes met you just about melted. You finally understood that famous and hunger-inducing line form Bridgerton - “I burn for you.” You were feeling it in real time. The energy between you two, the longing of his gaze and how it followed the curves of your body, taking you in from head to toe. You loved how you could see his restraint as you approached your table once again. You felt scrutinized but in a good way. You felt desirable, you felt like the perfect and delicate thing you’d always wanted to be in someone’s gaze. He made you feel like you were worth all the effort and more and you loved that. You knew you could be a little intense and rough around the edges at times but he clearly liked that. He found it amusing and endearing. He loved having something to fight for. He enjoyed proving to you why he was worth your time and effort.
“What?” you asked as you reached your seat and he shook his head.
“You’re just so fucking beautiful.” He hummed lowly as you settled into your seat. You smiled and then glanced up to him.
“Yeah? You think so?”
“I know so, love. Convincing myself otherwise was absolute torture.” He confessed and you bit your lip to suppress your smile and all of the feelings you had for him boiling inside of you. He shook his head and glanced down at his hands timidly. “Don’t do that…”
“Why not?” You pressed and he looked at you again.
“I don’t think I can handle it all.” He explained with a pained look in his eyes and you hummed softly. “You already smell so divine that I want to be close in enough to breathe you in. But you biting on your lip like that makes me want to bite it for you and suck it between my own. I know you’d taste so sweet because you like chewing that bubble mint gum.” He said to you lowly and you nodded almost dumbly as your gazes remained locked on each others.
“What if we call it a night a little early?” You asked him quietly and he smiled.
“Yeah?” He asked and you nodded and shivered when one of his hands landed on your thigh, right over your knee. 
“Text the driver.” You instructed and he nodded and pulled out his phone as you reached for your glass of wine. You chugged it down quickly as he texted the man, it was amusing to him how desperate you were to get out of there.
“D’you wanna stop for dumpli-”
“No.” You cut him off and he grinned before reaching for his own glass.
“I kind of don’t want to be anymore buzzed for you but-”
“It’ll feel nicer.” You said with a smile and he hummed.
“It would…” He agreed, his own smile ghosting along his lips.
“I’m still good though, are you?”
“Yeah, love.”
“Then, who cares?” You asked.
“You don’t mind?”
“Not at all.” You assured him.
“I want you so fucking bad. That’s what were talking about, right?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah.” You confirmed and he flashed you that charming, dimpled boyish grin that you’d missed so much.
“Okay. As long as you really don’t mind-”
“I don’t. I promise you. Just want to be alone with you.” You assured him and he hummed and finished his glass. “I ummm ran to some girls in the bathroom, they were so sweet to me, they were fans and I told them if they walked out behind us you could take a picture with them outside. Is that okay?”
“Yeah, love.” He assured and you smiled. Moments later the driver was informing you he was pulling up and you started to head out. The girls from the bathroom followed, as you instructed, and they got their photo before you guys slipped into the SUV smoothly and headed off into the night.
You were tingling with his hand running up and down your leg, his fingers danced along your skin. His nose was buried against your neck, kissing you up and down as he inhaled the sweet scent lingering on your skin and in your hair. He was whispering to you how much he missed you and how he wished he hadn’t wasted so much time in reaching out. His fingers were burning into your skin as he slid them up your thigh to a dangerous degree until you gripped around his wrist and smirked at him knowingly. 
“What?” He whispered huskily, his eyes already dark and hazy with need.
“You know what…” you hummed lowly and he grinned.
“Sorry, I am trying to behave.” He assured you and then planted a kiss on your temple and lowered his hand to above your knee again. As much as you were asking him to stop, a part of you enjoyed how he pushed the limits a little bit. He clearly was dying to touch you and you were absolutely touch starved. Even just having him rubbing over your knee was causing your skin to rise with goosebumps. You couldn’t arrive at your place any sooner.
When you were finally heading up your driveway you were about ready to burst at the seems. You could feel how wet you were for him, it was even dripping down between your cheeks and you knew he’d love to discover that on his own so you kept it to yourself. Once you got out of the car and thanked the driver, he took off and you keyed your way into your home. As soon as the door closed behind you he pressed you up against it and locked eyes with you.
“This is where I need the do over.” He mumbled, lips tickling your own.
“Tell me more…” You whispered and he smiled and gabbed your jaw with his right hand while he grabbed your hip with his left and he leaned in and kissed you quickly, like he had that first time and his eyes met yours with a fake apologetic look in them, it was amusing really.
“Shit.” He whispered between you two; just like he had the first time, “That was a mistake.” He hummed as he looked into your eyes and you smiled as you decided to play along and role play it with him.
“Then why did you do it?” You asked and he bit his lip, nose skimming your nose with his again.
“I can’t help it. I like you. I like you so fucking much, Y/N.” He confessed softly.
“Then do it again. Like you mean it this time.” You requested. Before you knew it he grabbed your face and kissed your deeply. The hunger of it was making you weak in the knees. Your tongues tangled as you guided his hands down your waist, hips, and finally to the bottom of your skirt.
“Yeah? Can I?”
“Please.” You insisted and he slid them up under the fabric to feel your underwear-covered butt. He kneaded your cheeks in his big, warm palms, squeezing the fleshy bits fervently and feeling you up, pressing you up against his growing erection.
“I want you. I want you so fucking bad.” He breathed into your mouth.
“Me too.” You panted as you looped your arms around his neck, “Should we go up to my room?”
“Are you sure?” He asked once more through his ragged breaths. You kissed his slowly and nodded into it.
“I’m so fucking sure.” You confirmed breathlessly and he kissed you deeply again before you guided him up the stairs and into your bedroom. You threw the door back and you two immediately started undressing.
You didn’t care to make it all that romantic, especially with how tipsy you both were, you guys just wanted to feel each other. So as soon as you were naked you guys fell into your bed and he kissed from your lips down your body. He didn’t waste an opportunity to inhale your perfume before sinking down to your breasts and sucking at your needy nipples while his fingers rubbed precise little circles into your throbbing little clit with no preamble. You were grateful he got straight to it because you were desperate for any stimulation.
“You’re so fucking wet f’me, baby.” He hummed before nipping at your sensitive nipple once more and you whimpered, “Is that how bad you want me?” He asked.
“Yes! Yes, I want you so bad!” You whined as he pulled and sucked at your breasts with more force. You winced and whined as he sucked marks into the tender flesh of them to his satisfaction and your own. Before long you started to feel that familiar warmth swirling in the put of your stomach from his fingers on your clit. “Yeah H, just like that!” You cried into the air as he swirled around the sensitive little button over and over until your vision started to blur with your approaching orgasm. 
His lips kissed down your abdomen and finally he ended up between your legs and licked at you expertly and you mewled in satisfaction. His tongue replaced his fingers and flicked at your needy little bud while one of his fingers plunged into the depths of you, searching around for your spot. When your legs startled to tremble around his head, attempting to lock him in place  he knew you were close. And just seconds later he pulled an orgasm from you with ease and snuck in another finger in, this caused you to gasp and tense up before you just melted into your bed. He was just hitting the perfect spot with his fingertips, rubbing into a part of you that was making your pussy flutter in a way it never had before and you felt another orgasm unexpectedly building up.
“Yes! Yes, baby! I-I’m coming!” You gasped and he moaned into your pussy as he tarted to suck on your clit and you began to whither around his thick, lock digits. You were covered in goosebumps as the pleasure started to roll through your body in wonderfully timed waves that allowed you to enjoy his persistent stimulation into your greedy little cunt. Even this wasn’t enough. You were trembling but begging for more. “Please, I need you. I need more.” You panted in your impaired state.
“Don’t have a condom, love.” He chuckled against your smooth and sticky folds.
“Just pull out.” You panted as you raked your fingers into his hair and he groaned against you.
“Don’t tempt me, baby.” He chuckled and you bit your lip and tugged him up by the hair until his eyes met yours.
“I’m serious.” You assured him as you swallowed thickly, “Please baby, need you to fuck me. Need you to fuck me so good I forget everything except you.” You panted and he licked over his lips with a near pained expression.
“ Baby-”
“Please, H. Please, give it t’me. Want you so badly, it hurts, that’s how bad I need you.” You begged and he groaned as he caved to your request with a deep and sloppy kiss. You knew he was painfully hard as well. As much as you wanted a taste of him, you’d much rather feel his big, thick cock spreading you open and splitting you apart.
“Y’sure?” He panted as he hovered above you.
“I’m so sure, baby. So sure.” You assured him as he glanced up at you and before you knew it he was kneeling over you as you helped him out of his boxer-briefs, wrapping his thick length in your palm the moment it fell out of its constraint.
“Shit, a little tighter.” He mumbled and you tightened your grip around him and stroked him over and over, up and down, keeping him at full mast. “That’s it. Jus’like that.” He sighed in relief. You could feel the sticky texture of his precome when you’d reach the tip and drag it down his length. After a few moment of this he lowered his hips and settled against your hot and drenched folds, immediately the wet squelching sounds of him sliding through your labia became the most prominent sound between you two. “So fucking wet f’me. Shit, you want my cock so bad, don’t you?” He panted and you nodded and whined, “Say it. Say you want my cock in that pretty little pussy and I’ll fuck you with it. Stretch open that tight little hole, make it all mine.” He breathed into the minimal space between you two.
“Please, H.” You panted, “I need your cock. Need to feel you spreading my tight little hole open.” You pleaded, tearful eyes meeting his and he groaned and leaned down, squeezing  his eyes shut as he kissed you for a few seconds before he guided himself down to your entrance and fed the tip into your weepy little hold. “Oh fuck!” You gasped softly as he started to push in and he moaned as he felt you start to stretch around him.
“You can take it. I know you can, baby.” He panted as his eyes met your wide eyes again. You nodded in confirmation for him to keep going and he pushed in further, splitting you open until your eyes just fluttered shut until he was bottoming out and sheathed fully in the warmth of your wet and velvety walls.
You swore his tip was poking into your stomach from how deep he was. You’d never felt so full before, you were paralyzed for a few moments. He was big and thick, you swore it wiped out part of your brain when he started to grind into you. The thick, ruddy tip of his cock was prodding into your g-spot, causing your mind to blank and for your body to shiver with an abundance of pleasure. You were getting more drunk on his dick and even the way he was grinning down at you as you let out the most obscene moans was feeding your pleasure.
“Shit, you take it so well…fuck, love to see that tight little hole stretching wide around my cock, baby. Y’feel so fucking good…so fucking tight and wet f’me.” He groaned as he thrusted in and out, watching your little hole puckering around his thick cock. He moaned every time he pulled back, watching your creamy arousal streaking down his shaft with each deep plunge into your needy little pussy. He moaned and spat against your folds before rubbing his thumb into your clit and you shuddered.
“Yes, baby! That’s it!” You mewled as you grabbed your breasts, pinching at your nipples, helping him draw you up the edge of your orgasm. Harry was panting, feeling his balls thwacking against your ass had his mind going fuzzy with excitement. 
“Fuck…fuuuuck, you’re gonna make me come so fucking hard!” He chuckled breathily, head thrown back as he delivered sharp and powerful thrusts into you, over and over, living for the feeling of his tip colliding into the depths of you.
“Oh fuck…fuck! I’m…ohmygodI’mcoming!” You slurred and he smiled as you started to whither beautifully. Your back arched up, nipples pointed straight towards the ceiling as you trembled and soaked his cock with a soft squirt from how deep he was getting. Your ears were ringing and you were seeing white behind your closed eyelids but he wasn’t letting up until you got through the whole thing. You could hear him moaning and struggling to keep it together as he thrust in and out of you. Your walls pulsed around his cock hard and fast with your slick coated all over his thick length, causing him to lose some control over his movements. You were covered in goosebumps, shivering as you continued to come hard around him.
“Shit, baby! Shit!” He gasped as he started thrusting erratically, losing the steady rhythm he had maintained until now.
“Come for me, H. Come for me, baby.” You encouraged him and he pulled out quickly and you wrapped your hand around his length and he thrust into your perfectly tight grip a few times until his breath hitched and he groaned when you felt the first spurt of his hot, milky cum right over your pubic bone. He moaned lowly as he started to unload all over your already sticky pussy. You guided him between your swollen and sensitive folds, letting him thrust against you as he spilled all over your swollen pussy with his cum. His body was trembling as you rubbed at his bicep until he minimized the space between you and caught your lips with his. “Mmm…fuck…” he hummed and you smiled
“Good?”
“So fucking good.” He panted breathily and you pecked his lips quickly. “Was it good for you?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yeah, H. More than.” You assured and he smiled before kissing you again.
“Good, love.” He whispered before resting his weight on one elbow before kissing you deep and slow. He took his time tasting you properly and only pulled away when you both needed to breathe, “Jut as things should’ve been from the start.” He hummed and you kissed his lips quickly.
“We’re here now, yeah?” You asked quietly and he smiled and nodded.
“Yeah.” He hummed, “So, does this mean we can give us a real chance?” He asked as his fingers found yours and you nodded and smiled as he bought your hand up to his mouth and kissed it.
“I’d love that, Harry.” You assured him and he smiled brightly at you.
“Thank you for giving me another chance after the stunt I pulled before.” He said more seriously.
“I like you too much not to.” You said with a small smile and he smiled and kissed you once more. 
“Well I assure you, there’s far more making up I plan on doing…” He smirked and you bit your lip excitedly, “Just you wait.”
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lunarw0rks · 1 year
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Hello! I just found your blog and I just started reading everything I saw 😅. Can I request 141 + König + Alejandro with a pregnant reader? They don't know yet and when the reader will break the news they are really stressed with work and end up taking it out on the reader, they end up getting into an argument and saying they hate the reader and that their life would be so much better without the reader in it (😈). The reader takes this seriously and leaves when they are asleep... Months later they meet again when the reader is on her way to the hospital to give birth (😈). Angst to fluff pls. If you don't feel good about writing or it's too big, that's fine. Have a nice day and thank you so much for all the time you spend writing to us.
The Things We Say // 141 Drabble
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Summary: You're expecting, but it's not good news. To him, at least. Your relationship takes a hit, but once he meets your child, he's swallowed with regret for how he treated you.
Warning(s): angst to fluff, hurt/comfort, pregnancy, childbirth, mentions of premature birth/complications, mild injury/blood, strong language, established relationship, fem!Reader, no use of y/n
A/N: I was hurting my own feelings---but, there's fluff after the angst, so don't get too upset besties<3 Hope you don't mind anon, I took some creative liberty because I didn't want them all to have the same plotline. | Word Count: 5.9k
꒦꒷ MAIN MASTERLIST ꒷꒦ 141 MASTERLIST // have a request? ⋆ ⚘ 🕊 ˚✧ ₊˚ʚ ao3 ver.
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SYNOPSIS; he had been in the thick of it lately, sometimes more overwrought when at home with you than in active combat, it seemed. Conversations were either abrupt, crude, or nonexistent—often just building on top of the tension building between the two of you. Relationships were supposed to be fifty-fifty, but you felt you were carrying the burden of the whole percentage. That’s why the news couldn’t have come at a worse time—you, staring at the two lines instead of one. No matter how long you stared, double-checked the diagram, the answer was the same. Pregnant. So, now you knew two things for certain, you were expecting, and most heartbreaking—the other one responsible was at his worst. To break the news to him, it took every fiber of your being.
⋘ » ☆ « ⋙
AFTERMATH; nine months of hell. That’s how you would answer if someone asked. Few people did though, even at work or out on the street. There was the occasional boy or girl, how are you feeling. But they were being polite, or taking pity on the pregnant woman without a ring on her finger. The pregnant woman with bags under her eyes, the one who winces with each step because she’s ready to pop. None of it meant anything to you, because the other half of this responsibility had been left in the dark, and not for much longer. You weren’t raising this child alone, no matter how irate he was going to be when you contacted him.
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Price
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One of John’s many talents; stewing on his feelings, keeping them suppressed for an unnatural amount of time.
Often so long that he forgot about the source of his anger once he had time to catch up to them. That is… Until his work was involved. Then he was an entirely different man, often spending his time deep in a bottle and with a nose deep in paperwork, with little regard for anyone else around him.
His control, it was typically so consistent, that he knew not to bring his professional problems home. But lately? It’s been anything but typical. He wasn’t what you would call mean, but there was definitely a negative word to describe it. Cold? Apathetic? Perhaps even unwelcoming?
The bickering, if you could call it that, had droned on for several minutes now. Though, it was mostly you venting your frustrations to an uninterested Price. ❝I know it’s not good timing, John. Why the fuck do you think I’m in here trying to reason with you? Are we just supposed to ignore this until we can’t anymore?❞ You hissed, tempted to rip the paperwork from his grip to get him to pay attention.
He always wanted children, but not right now. Naturally, that’s when it happened. He felt like he was drowning, at first only professionally, but now personally too. The funds weren’t a problem, the kid had two parents, but… you and him—nothing was working.
❝Sweetheart, I’m in the thick of it right now. Please.❞ He didn’t need to raise his voice for you to see how irritated he was. Perhaps at the baby, you, himself, or all the above. ❝I have a meeting.❞ He stood up from his workspace, steaming coffee in hand.
John walked away from you like you were a pestering soldier, not the mother of his child. Enough was enough.
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He thought he was slick, only giving you physical checks to see your face, to ensure that you were indeed alright. It was often the coffee shop within equal walking distance of your two separate homes. John would always slide the amount you needed across the table, a look of remorse on his face. Each monthly meeting, your stomach would grow in size, as did your drained expression.
But you wouldn’t talk to him. You would only text him the amount, nod when he asked questions. It was the worst torture you could put a man like John through—one that needed the approval of his loved ones. It just couldn’t happen, not yet. The wounds of how he treated you, they were too fresh, even after nine months of this routine.
To be truthful, you debated on even calling him when you went into labor. You could do it alone, right? With just the support of the delivery nurses, and most of all your baby girl as the reward? Perhaps you could wait until after, give him the respect to at least meet his daughter. For someone not carrying a child, he looked just as beat; sunken eyes, less tidy facial hair than usual, and somehow even more tobacco on his breath.
John was clawing himself from the inside out, begging for something other than a “yes” or “no” from your lips.
❝I can’t do this,❞ you repeated it about fifty times, tears streaming down your cheeks from both the pain and the distraught feelings. That plan you had to not call him, it was falling through quite quickly. This level of agony? You needed someone other than a doctor. You needed the father, as much as it pained you to admit.
❝Yes, you can dear, women have babies everyday.❞ Bless the nurse, she was trying her best to keep you calm, but it didn’t work.
What if something went wrong? If somehow you didn’t make it but your baby girl did, she would be alone until he got here… That couldn’t, no—wouldn’t happen. He needed to be there, right beside this bed to hold her in case you couldn’t.
In between your pained grunts, you finally spit out what you’d been trying to tell her, finding a split second of sensibility during all this distress. ❝Call… John. Please, call him!❞
The doors swung open faster than any of the personnel, his gaze softening when he saw you breathing in a patterned fashion. The nurse beside you gave him a nod, freeing your hand for him to take her place. John wasn’t going to miss this, and frankly, he was irked that he almost did. But he wasn’t irked at you; he was irked at himself for taking this for granted.
His soothing voice talks you through each contraction, a soothing hand dabbing away the sweat and tears streaming down your face.
❝I got you, sweetheart. You’re almost done pushing.❞ Though he looked gruff on the outside, inside he was distraught. You had maintained the cold shoulder throughout the pregnancy, but you still called him here? You were more than he deserved in his eyes.
The last round of pushing, and they were close together now. You had about thirty seconds to say this, before you were screaming again.❝I’m glad you’re here.❞ Despite all the pain you were in, you gave his hand a squeeze, staring at him with a glossy expression.
His eyes nearly watered; the first sentence you had uttered to him in months, and it was clear you meant every bit of it. You needed him and so did your daughter, right here right now. He pressed a kiss to your temple, a soothing massaging your shoulder.
John kept his tone firm on purpose, to emphasize how deeply he cared for you right now. ❝I’ll always be here for you, love. Always.❞ 
Simon
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Simon loved deep; hated even deeper.
It was one of the features that drew you to him in the first place, how blunt he could be, how his broodiness contrasted your personality in more ways than one. His cynical behavior could be humorous, could be reassuring, but most of all—bitter. To add stress to the equation, to bring it home? He was an explosive disaster waiting to happen.
❝Simon,❞ you approached from behind, holding the test in your hands, because you knew the first question he would ask when you told him; is if you took one. Well, if he wasn’t actively cursing under his breath, he would’ve.
Instead, he merely flicked his eyes over for a brief moment, as if you were a stranger on the street that said excuse me. ❝Simon.❞ Your tone grew firmer, clutching the stick with more apprehension.
❝Bloody Christ, what?❞ He shifted in his seat, bloodshot and hooded eyes that only twisted the knife further. You couldn’t tell him now, not with the pressure of being on the spot. The right words just wouldn’t come out, prompting you to put the stick behind your back. ❝Goddamn nuisance.❞ He muttered under his breath as if it was only supposed to be an internal thought. 
Though, he didn’t look all that remorseful about it—at least on the outside.
He had never said anything like that before, at least not to your face. It seemed, all the weeks of tension and cold shoulder, it was enough. You were done and out the door the second he’d dozed.
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Simon made a few futile attempts to reach out, but his own stubbornness prevented him from ever being face-to-face. He beat himself up so badly, and from his side of things—he’d only lost one person, not two.
It pained you to ask the delivery nurse to call him. You wanted to shove the crowning newborn right back inside and hold off, to go find him yourself and smack sense into him for putting you through this agony. But you couldn’t. Quite literally couldn’t get up, and didn’t want to. Resulting in pettiness and venom would make you worse than him because you would be using this child as a pawn.
He said nothing, but his eyes said enough. The nurses put a sterile drape over his shoulders, but he paid them no mind. His amber eyes remained on you; a bulging belly and an expression of pure agony. Had he missed something, a crucial chapter of your new life post-breakup? Most of all, why did you call him?
❝Hold my hand.❞ Simon found the side of your bed, allowing you to dig your fingernails into his forearm until there were imprints. He had few words, but the countenance of concern and guilt said it all. If this wasn’t his… you would’ve done this alone, or the father would be here. Then it dawned on him; it was his.
Hours passed, and he still hadn’t mentioned the obvious. Nine months without his support—financial or moral. You needed rest, as did the baby girl—so you were getting it, first and foremost. The adult matters would be better talked about when you weren’t still freshly recovering.
Simon tapped his foot against the tile, sitting in the chair beside the bed. He was unsure of who to keep an eye on more; the newborn swaddled in her own crib, or you, exhaustedly sleeping in your hospital bed. Though he’d held the girl, it felt forbidden, like he was only a placeholder until your body recovered enough to do it yourself. It was shock preventing him from feeling, not cruelty.
You stirred awake, a sigh of contempt when you laid eyes on him. The labor was a blur your mind had already shut out, and you truly didn’t recall the nurses contacting him. Your eyes were glossy with dark circles underneath them. ❝I’m…❞ It was like the night you tried to tell him but couldn’t, the words wouldn’t come out.
Simon saw that look in your eyes; the fear that he would explode, or storm out and leave you with the child forever—but he wasn’t. All the years of trying to not relieve the same mistakes his own father made, it would be useless if he did that. And he couldn’t, seeing that look of desperation on your face, how you looked as if you were going to burst into tears at the sight of him. That look, it was the same one that gnawed at him during those months apart, how he found you and your belongings gone.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this. ❝Shh… Don’t apologize. Ever.❞ He was hovering now, a kiss pressed to your forehead. Whatever you decided when you were healed enough, he would take it like a man, because he had the audacity to speak to you like a man who wronged him.
Soap
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Soap was… a complicated man to say the least. Usually, he was sweet, charming, with the right amount of cockiness. His ability to make you laugh drew you into him in the first place. But it was dwindling—at least during the past few weeks. Now, all that remained was smugness and bitter mutters under the breath.
❝Don’t be a child about this, we’ll figure it out,❞ He says, slamming his car door behind you. The first time you two had been out to dinner together in weeks, spoiled because you finally broke the news to him. You teared up in the restaurant because his reaction was anything but accepting, and frankly, he found it embarrassing.
He hadn’t meant it that way—that’s just how it came out.
He truly did want to figure this baby thing out, but it was the worst possible timing; an all-time high of stress at work, bickering with you constantly. And now, a third added to the dynamic with only months to prepare? It was too much. ❝Oh, I’m acting like a child?❞ You walked into the house, taking off the jewelry you had on to look nice for him.
The bickering that ensued—it was nothing nice, nothing you’d care to remember.
❝I don’t want you to go, lass. Don’t do this.❞ You had already made up your mind. Perhaps it was your emotions clouding your judgment, that instinct you felt being a few weeks along… It didn’t matter, you couldn’t be here. Not with him, not right now.
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You were about to pop, literally any day now. You knew that meant you would have to talk to the father, and interact with him for about eighteen years—at least be civil. But the rationality of it, how you would have to co-parent with him, didn’t ease your anxieties. Of course, he was adamant about checking up on you and being more of a parasite than the fetus taking half your energy.
You closed the car door with your hip, a slow waddle up the pavement. Where the hell your keys were, that was another story—something you would deal with once you rolled yourself up to the door.
❝What the hell are you doin’?❞ The voice nearly made you drop all the grocery bags in your grasp, a jumpy shriek coming out. When you whipped around, it was Soap, a look of upset on his very expressive face.
Once you started to recover from the scare of a lifetime, an unintentional one at that, a scowl formed on your face. It was like he had a sense of the absolute worst time to show up and annoy you, especially now that you were swollen and extra agitated. ❝A phone call would’ve worked, Johnny. Or, I don’t know, maybe a ‘hey I’m right behind you, lady’!❞ You attempted to mock his accent out of pure frustration, but he didn’t find the humor in it, at least not right away.
He yanked the bags out of your grip, stomping up the steps of your porch. ❝You shouldn’t be carryin’ these.❞ You really should not be doing that, he was right, but the thought of him being your grocery boy—showing up even more? ❝Keys.❞ He held out his free hand, the other one swimming in bags. It was ridiculous, apparently, you weren’t allowed to twist a key now, either.
You shove past him once he’s turned the key, squeezing past and joining him in the kitchen. Without a word, he starts putting away anything and everything you bought. Some are nutritious, others purely to feed your cravings. ❝Don’t start.❞ You pointed a finger at him when he picked up a family-sized bag of candy, a smart-ass comment daring to escape his lips.
❝God, I can’t believe you, Johnny. Sneaking up on me like that, I could’ve fallen.❞ You put an instinctive hand on your stomach, still irked by his presence.
❝No, you would’ve fallen carrying all those bags yourself. I have a right to be worried, it’s my bloody kid too.❞ He retorts, a hand on his hip. He’s done all he’s obligated to now; carrying and putting away your groceries.
You tighten your lips into a line, fighting the urge to start a full-blown argument. ❝Yeah, you remind me every day, so thanks for tha— Shit.❞ It seemed, raising your voice counted as exerting yourself because there was a sudden cramp in your stomach, a trickle down your pant leg.
Soap’s eyes widened, seeing you go from scolding him to hunched over and holding your stomach. You had forced yourself into labor, now standing on knees about to buckle. ❝I’ve got you, now get going woman, before I put you over my shoulder.❞ He felt he had never moved faster, a tight fist around your forearm to keep you standing as he led you through the door you had just walked in.
It seemed there was little time between being admitted to actively pushing. This kid wanted out, and right this second. You let out a shriek as the back of your head slammed against the pillow, sweat trickling down your brow as you cursed and wailed. ❝I know it hurts, love, but you got this.❞ He allowed you to clamp down on his hand, to dig your fingertips until they drew blood.
❝Oh, you know do you?!❞ You snapped at him, finding it hard to be nice when you felt like you were being ripped in half.
❝If I wasn’t,❞ you grunted in between words, face scrunched and labored breathing, ❝stuck in this damn bed, I would so… hurt you right now, Johnny.❞ He fought the urge to snicker just a little bit, masking it with his concern for you. Seeing you in agony, even when you were actively snapping at him, it didn’t please him one bit.
Well, you were arguing with him, so he knew you weren’t actively dying.
If you used enough of that anger, it would help you literally push through the pain, just like how it caused the kid to want to come out right this second. For once, his pestering and sarcasm were actually helping.
With one final wave of it, your back arched off the bed and finally, the loud cry of an infant filled the white-walled room. Soap nearly fainted, if he was being honest—he was awfully squeamish for someone who dealt with blood daily. But it was your blood and… fluids, things that made him shiver when he pictured how painful that could’ve been.
The doctors were speedy, cleaning off and checking vitals. All he could do was stare at the newborn—his baby boy. And then he looked at you, choked up and stared in awe at the baby set on your chest. ❝Jesus…❞ he leaned down, placing a gentle hand on yours as it held the child’s head.
All the fighting, all the bickering, even the late-night candy runs—they were well worth it. He had a second chance now, to make things right with you, and to be a decent father.
Gaz
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Gaz could be hotheaded, sometimes downright blunt, especially when he’s passionate about something to do with his work. The night you were going to break the news, nothing was going right. He came home in a huff, not bothering to take off his boots before plopping on the sofa. Kyle had a right to be stressed; look at what he does all day. But he didn’t have a right to be cruel to you because of it.
You took a seat beside him and set the positive test down on his thigh. A silence followed by a scowl, and then he finally spoke. ❝You can’t be serious.❞ It nearly gutted you right then and there. His leg began to bounce anxiously the longer he glanced at the life-changing test results. 
❝Kyle, I—❞ you weren’t even sure what you were trying to say either, not that he gave you a chance. ❝I don’t have time for this, babe. I really can’t do this right now.❞ He put his head in his hands, a flustered groan escaping his lips.
❝Are you saying you don’t want this? That we shouldn’t have done this?❞ You were suddenly standing, eyes wide and watering. You felt like you had just been dumped on the street, despite his unclear tone.
He peered up, lips in a blunt line. ❝Maybe we shouldn’t have.❞ You could’ve crawled into a hole and died right then and there, but you merely nodded. Nodded and then left the room, leaving him to his moodiness. No, it wasn’t the best timing, but that didn’t give him the right to brush you off, to treat you like a distasteful afterthought.
It wasn’t just you anymore, it was you and the baby.
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It was one of his few days off—though he wasn’t feeling much relaxation. You were still hot and cold with him, now about halfway through your third trimester; thirty-two weeks to be exact. It was nearing that point, where he had prepared a spare room for the baby, began coordinating plans for labor, etc… 
But he still didn’t feel ready, or like he deserved you after how cruel he was that night. Kyle was only helping you to help you and the baby.
His phone buzzed, right when he had begun relaxing for the evening. 10:32 PM; and it was your number. The second he heard the voice of a nurse on the other line, not yours, his feet were halfway out the front door.
❝I’m fine, Kyle. I’m fine…❞ It seemed no matter how many times you repeated it, he didn’t seem to believe it. From the minute he entered your hospital room to now, he had at least one hand on you, a thumb grazing the cuts and bruises on your body. You had been in a car accident—mild for you, life-threatening for a preemie. ❝You’re not fine.❞ he said firmly, eyes darting towards your clothes bagged in the corner—bloodied and with windshield pieces still embedded.
Kyle was more worried about you at first, but you were solely concerned about your baby—left alone in the NICU being poked and prodded by personnel. You had to be induced, otherwise he wouldn’t have made it past the front doors. Now, he was too weak to be visited, too small and vulnerable to be held by his own mother yet. It was gut-wrenching; hours without a solid answer, because his chances depended solely on him making it through the night.
Now, there was nothing to do but wait, perhaps see your baby through a glass box if you got lucky.
❝He’s perfect,❞ Kyle peered down at the preemie in his hands, a baggy blue cap on his head. There were small babies, and he was somehow smaller. What once was the scare of a lifetime, it was now a passing memory to remind Gaz of what he could’ve lost. He would never make the mistake of talking to you like that again, even if the two events didn’t correlate.
What if the night you left, you got into an accident then, and it was much worse? He wouldn’t be able to live with himself, plain and simple. ❝It’s cheesy but, he does have your eyes.❞ You whispered from the nursing chair you were sitting in, still healing and fatigued from the ordeal. The picture in front of you; Kyle looking at your son with such love—it was irreplaceable and forever stuck in your memories.
❝Correct. But he has your scowl, babe.❞ Gaz flicked his eyes upwards, feeling you gently nudge his shin at the sound of the comment.
It didn’t matter the things he said months ago, as long as he cherished this new life with you as much as you planned to.
Alejandro
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Alejandro always had passion for the things he cherished; you and his work, nothing else mattered more. Passion led to intense feelings, intense feelings turned into misplaced bitterness. It wasn’t your fault that you were expecting, no more than it was his, at least. He knew that and had he just taken a breath and thought more carefully about his phrasing, this whole mess could’ve been avoided.
❝Do you think I wanted to interrupt you, Alejandro?❞ You hissed, standing in the doorway of his office with the positive test in your hands. He had just looked at you with such distaste as if you were the root cause of his stress and not his work.
What better way to stir the pot, than to match his wrath? Well, it certainly did that, though seeing him rage was the last sight you wanted to see. Alejandro always had trouble with his anger, often finding himself with all these feelings he had no clue how to control.
❝You always do what you want!❞ There it was, him blowing his fuse. He’d thrown his hands in the air, face tightened into a scowl. He couldn’t leave it at that, either, not when his rage came in such intense waves. ❝You’ll do what you always do—bleed me dry!❞
You couldn’t speak, despite how vicious you felt only seconds before. It seemed too truthful for your liking like he had been waiting for an excuse to spill his guts. ❝As long as you have enough to amuse yourself, I’m nothing to you, right?❞ He wasn’t yelling anymore, but his mocking tone was enough to tear at your heartstrings.
Had he seriously played that card with you—the man always insistent on taking care of you, financially, physically, emotionally? Now, of all times? The argument ended with you slamming the front door behind you, something he would’ve done.
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You spent weeks ignoring him, and throughout the pregnancy, it was dry texts or brief calls. His only sign that you were even alive was the notification that you had used his account to purchase necessities. The irony of it made Alejandro nauseous, how awful he made it sound that you were doing what he told you to; to let him take care of you. The fact that you didn’t drain the funds, only bought what you needed, spoke volumes.
❝I’m not upset at you, amor—I wasn’t upset with you.❞
Alejandro reached a hand across the picnic table, a firm but loving grip on your forearm. You looked beat; hair a different length than before, exhausted eyes that were brimming with tears, and most of all a growing stomach. It was all his fault; the reason you didn’t want to face him like this, in fear that he would cut you and the baby off for good. Only, he was there to see your face, not for confrontation or another spat.
It didn’t matter what you said, if you screamed at him right now, or said nothing. Alejandro had made up his mind the night you left. ❝I’ll come to every appointment, parenting class, anything.❞
Of all the nights for you to be in labor, it had to be during a wicked storm. You had gone over to his house to make civil conversation over dinner, to at least attempt at repairing things. He had slaved over the stove, cooking his favorite for you. For most of the meal, things were… surprisingly tranquil; even romantic.
You were heavily pregnant, were you supposed to refuse a warm meal? Not a chance. You were too full, too swollen to get up out of the dining chair once the meal finished. And looking out the window? There was no way in hell Alejandro was going to let you drive home in this; droplets whipped down, trees and waste bins flew away from the force of it, and the rain was icy. Well, you were exhausted, and he had a bed he was willing to give up. Your back and feet practically sighed in relief when you laid back in his bed, the one you two once shared. It was a nice feeling, being there again and knowing Alejandro was trying his hardest to plead forgiveness.
About an hour into your much needed-slumber, you felt a pool in the sheets. Instinctually, you figured it was the fetus pressing on your bladder—a downright embarrassing thing you’d have to wake up and explain to him. But… it was clear it wasn’t that. You were in labor and stuck here.
The shriek you let out when you got a violent contraction; Alejandro dashed quicker than he ever did when dodging bullets. His fumbling fingers dialed 911, yanking the comforter off the bed to get a better view of your dilation. Fortunately, he was trained on how to deliver a baby when stranded, or in a country without medical support. But this was his baby and your life was in his hands. If he didn’t do this correctly, if something went wrong, he would never forgive himself.
The ambulance wouldn’t be there for an hour—you didn’t have an hour to spare, this baby was coming now. ❝You can do this, amor, we’re doing this together.❞ One hand clenched yours, the other kept an eye on the crowning baby. Just how you hadn’t woken up sooner, neither of you knew. Perhaps you had gotten so used to cramps and pains, that you thought it was just another sleepless night courtesy of the little one.
The moment your wails went silent as his baby girl finally came, Alejandro felt his heart drop. He had to make the worst decision; focusing on the newborn first. He wrapped her in one of his shirts, wiping the fluid and blood from her small face. As he cradled her, a quick hand fingered for a pulse, a loud sigh escaping his lips when he felt one. You had only passed out from the pain—probably doing you a service, considering he didn’t have the proper medication to numb your pain.
Your eyes fluttered open at the sound of the wailing child, still with gritted teeth. But your baby was there—and her lungs were very clearly working. Alejandro set her down on your chest, allowing you to hold your daughter for the first time. ❝You did so well, cariño. Look at her.❞ He was merely distracting you with the baby on your chest, to not divert your attention towards the state your body was in as he cleaned you up.
Somehow, he had pulled this off with both his girls safe, soon to be checked out properly at a hospital. When you first broke the news, he thought he knew the meaning of being so suddenly thrust into fatherhood, but that took on a whole new meaning after tonight.
König
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There had once been a line he didn’t cross, but he did that night. König never yelled at you. He saved that stern side of him for his work because it was acceptable there. But in the weeks that his work had bled onto you, spoiling the relationship, his values seemed to loosen. Though he was a complicated man, a man uncertain of himself and his appearance, he maintained a hardness about him. Ruthless in the field and immensely protective of anyone that had come to love him. 
You approached him as he worked, placing the test on the desk he was sitting at. ❝König, I need to tell you something.❞
With his head facing the paperwork, he merely shrugged at you. Until he saw what you’d placed there, his eyes going wide. But it wasn’t shock or excitement; it was disdain for the fact that this baby was just another interruption—you were just another interruption. ❝I have no time for this, Schatz, you know that.❞
He didn’t need to raise his voice for his words to sting, his bitter tone was more than enough. But he surely hadn’t meant it like that, right? He’d meant he didn’t have time for this right now… right?
❝Why don’t you go rest, then?❞ He asks, picking up the folder that he was reading previously. It wasn’t a request made out of concern, König was patronizing you. His glare was typically enough to make a soldier scramble, but you just stood there for a few seconds, biting back the urge to choke.
How you left that night, it wasn’t dramatic or emotional, it was dry. König tells you to think clearly about this, to sleep on it. But you couldn’t—and you weren’t going to be a verbal punching bag.
➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶➴➵➶
König only called you weekly for appointment updates, or to let you know he had sent you a check. Other than that, words dripped with tension and the urge to say so much more. But you were too stubborn for your own good, and so was he. You were more concerned with hosting life than playing games with a father who treated you like a wimp.
He’d only seen you once, during the second trimester when he showed up at your apartment. You protested, but he showed up anyway, saying he needed “proof” that you and the fetus were safe. The voice on the phone wasn’t enough, in his eyes.
Of course, when you needed him most, screaming and keeling over in the kitchen, he wasn’t there. It was a neighbor that called an ambulance for you because they knew they had a pregnant tenant next door. In fact, it was such a close call, you nearly didn’t make it to the delivery room before the newborn came out wailing.
The only plus side? While the paramedics were deterring you from pushing, you’d sent a text—probably unintelligible—but a text, nonetheless. He knew your due date, how today was only a few days off, and he was in his car before he could grasp the severity of this new life stage.
❝I’m here, schätzchen. I’m not going to hurt you again, or him.❞ He hunched over the bed, eyes in a perpetual state of disbelief as he watched you soothe the whining newborn. Clarity hit him like a truck when he heard your screams during delivery, and then he was all in. Not that he had a choice, this was his doing too.
He had given you the financial support to get proper nutrition for you and the baby, to pay for the appointments, but that wasn’t enough—not in König’s eyes. He needed to snap out of his self-pity and be a support system. Whether you wanted to co-parent or work on repairing the relationship, you were not under any circumstances taking care of this newborn alone, at your apartment.
He placed a hand in your hair, threading his fingers through the strands. ❝We can clear out the spare room, hm? There’s more than enough room for the two of you.❞ He was already picturing it, how he was going to pull an all-nighter and get to work on the room, going to your apartment and moving the baby supplies from yours to his.
König didn’t need to state the obvious, that you weren’t bound to any type of relationship besides the one concerning the child. Whether you wanted to move out once the baby hit a certain age or not, he was going to keep an eye on the two of you.
Two of you, not just the newborn you were rocking. It was either both of you, or neither, and he was intent on it being the first option.
If you made it this far - THANK YOU!
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luvrxbunny · 11 months
Text
crybaby
Pairing: Eddie Munson x F!Reader 
Prompt: Dacryphilia(?)
Warnings: 18+ MDNI, insecure thoughts/relationship doubts, piv, unprotected sex  (lmk if I forgot anything)
WC: 3.1k
A/N: *gasp* im on time?! i hope this counts- reader is crying but it's not a turn-on or anything, it's kinda just something that's happening
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Eddie’s band had been on tour for a month now, all his classes were online and he’d Facetime you so you could ensure he’s doing his work but you still miss him. He’s supposed to come home in a week and you don’t know what you’re going to do. You’ve been stressed out of your mind without his calming presence, you’ve told him about some of your stresses and he’s helped but you’re starting to feel like you’re just putting a dampener on his tour so you stopped. 
You miss him so much it’s heartbreaking. You knew it would be hard, after being with Eddie for two years now you guys have never spent more than a week apart. You thought though, that after being with him for so long you’d be fine, you’d saved up enough ‘Eddie Time’ to get through the month. You couldn’t have been more wrong. 
He was nice enough to let you stay in his room for the month, and you never noticed how big his bed was. You actually used to complain that it isn’t big enough for the both of you but now the only thing you can think is how big it is. If this bed was really made for one person then why is it so big? 
Your math homework is scattered on the floor, thrown off the bed in a fit of frustration. You miss him. It’s not that he could’ve done the math for you or anything but he’d make you feel better at least, help you google it and try to figure it out, maybe make you feel like less of a dumbass. But he’s not here. You sigh into his pillow before inhaling his faint scent, tears almost springing to your eyes. 
You try not to tell him too much about how deeply your yearning for him goes. You don’t want him to feel bad for leaving, you couldn't be more proud of him for booking this little tour and you’d never want him to stay back for you… but it wouldn’t hurt if he could make a little more time. These past few weeks you’ve barely been able to keep him on the phone, only being available for a few minutes before having to run into a meeting, a practice session, or a vocal lesson. Apparently, he tried to cram all of his meetings and such into this week so that he could spend his last few tour nights getting shitfaced. 
He had told you the plan in a rushed and staticky call while he was in an elevator, that was the only free time he had for you, his girlfriend. An elevator ride.
So now you’re in his favorite pair of panties and one of his shirts in case he wants to video call. He gave you piles of silly promises of video-chat sex, you laughed at them when he made them but started craving them after the first two days. He called you on the Wednesday of his first week gone with plans for ‘sex’ but ended up a bit too tired. That was the only time he called… You’re still hopeful though. 
You try your best to hold back your tears as you press your face into his pillow. You jump when you hear the front door unlock but when you check the time you realize it’s just Wayne. He doesn’t mind you being here, you make your own dinner and buy groceries sometimes, other than that you guys don’t really interact so you stay where you are, sniffling into Eddie’s pillow. Unfortunately, you miscalculated how loud you were because suddenly Eddie’s room door opened and your body froze. You’re waiting for him to make some awkward attempt at a soothing, comforting conversation, muscles tense with the promise of embarrassment. 
“Man, I don’t even get a ‘hi’?” Eddie.
Your head whips up from the pillow and your heart breaks at the way his smile drops along with his bags as he rushes to your side of the bed. “What’s wrong? Did Wayne say some-” You’re sitting up and crashing your lips into his with a sob, wrapping your arms around his neck and pulling his body to press against yours. You’re still getting up, wanting to be as close to him as you can and now kneeling on the bed, almost his height as he’s standing. You’re gripping the sides of his face, whimpering into his mouth as he coos into yours and his hands are around your waist, pulling your body into his.
You only pull away once you begin to feel light-headed from the lack of oxygen and even then you’re still pressing kisses all over his giggling face. He has to wrestle you into a hug to get you to stop, laughing into your ear with his chest bouncing against yours. “So you missed me?” He says with a cocky tone, but when he pulls away to smile at you there’s a genuine vulnerability in them that you’re in love with. 
You kiss him again, a little peck before smiling against his lips. “I missed you so much, Eddie.” Your voice cracks with emotion and his arms tense around you for a moment before lifting to cup your cheek and pulling you in for a slow, romantic kiss. His tongue slides over your lips before slipping into your mouth and relearning your taste. You can already feel yourself melting for him, all your bones turning to jelly and dampening your panties. You’re pulling him down already, trying to get him in bed and he’s laughing. 
“Slow down, baby! I-” You kiss him again, a silent beg for him to just get in bed with you. You bring your hands into his hair and whimper against him as your hips twitch in the air just from his taste. You slide your tongue into his mouth this time, earning a shocked moan from the back of his throat as your tongue slides against his, admiring its softness and the moans the action elicits from him. His hands leave your body as he fumbles with his belt. He’s nodding subtly and subconsciously against you as he gives in to his needs. 
You can hear him growing more unrestrained as he takes his pants off, his breaths quickly speed up and become heavier. His movements get a bit fumbled and frantic as he tries to kiss you and get his long legs out of his skinny jeans. He ends up crashing on you, tripping over his pants, and landing half on you half on the bed. He’s giggling intermittently, still trying to drown his lips in yours. You’re grinning wildly at his desperation, happy that he needed you as badly as you needed him.
“Calm down, sweetheart.” You chuckle half-heartedly against his neck once he gets his leather jacket off. He’s left in his wife beater, boxers, and chains, climbing over you, hands roaming every part of your body. He has this animalistic look in his eyes, one you’re sure matches the look on your face. You wrap your arms around his waist, running your hands lightly up his back and smiling at the way he shudders as his eyelids flutter. His hand comes up to rest beside your head as he lowers his crotch to yours, holding eye contact and groaning once his pulsing cock comes in contact with your hot core. 
He leans back and reaches down for the hem of the t-shirt- his t-shirt that you’re wearing and pulls it up. He has to apologize for the way his hips jerk against yours, thrusting him against your covered pussy like he was actually fucking you, but he couldn’t help it, not when you’re wearing these panties. He leans back down and presses his forehead against yours to let a ragged groan out against your face. Your hips twitch into his slowly building pace at the sound.
“How-” He cuts himself off with a groan and buries his face in your neck, muttering praises and kissing the skin there before coming back up. “How can you tell me to- to calm down when you know-” One hand comes down to the band of your panties, reaching between your thighs to pull the elastic there and snap it against your sensitive skin. “You know you’re wearing these… hm? Explain that, sweetheart.” He says the last tone with a drop of venom, teasing the nickname you used for him earlier while purposely grinding his tip into your clit so he can watch you stumble over your answer. 
He chuckles and pulls away once he’s had enough of your silent, trembling lips, trying desperately to form words for him. He pulls his boxers down to his thighs and takes one leg out before pulling on the elastic of your panties again. “Are you just gonna watch or do you wanna get undressed too, my love?”
He says it with a smirk but there’s something about it that’s more loving than teasing as it has a new heat blooming over the one that’s already resting in your stomach. You’d been just staring at him, admiring him as he undressed and you’re sneaking peeks at him even now, as you take your panties off. He smiles at your struggle to take them off, wiggling on your back to shimmy them around your thighs and he’s climbing back over you the second you have them off. 
“Been needing you so long, baby.” His statement sounds so genuine as he strokes his cock against your entrance, the tip nudging into your messy hole on every other stroke. It’s a tease but Eddie doesn’t even mean for it to be, he’s just mesmerized by the way his cock is just crying into you, pouring everything he has into your perfect little hole. He groans and has to shut his eyes, a bit worried at how the thought makes his cock throb. He looks up at you for assurance once more and his face crumbles at the way you’re already staring at him. You’re giving him the big pretty eyes, the sweetest face you have, begging him to put it in, to fill your every crevice with his thick cock and he gives it to you before you can even blink. 
He thrusts his hips forward, plowing his way through your tight ring of muscle, groaning at the way you squeeze his cock and the way your hands are gripping his shoulders, looking for purchase from the pleasure he’s assaulting you with. You try to stay calm, you keep your limbs from shaking, your eyes from rolling back and you’re trying to keep your face neutral but his cock twitches inside you once, and your entire resolve breaks. A shiver runs up your spine as you curl in on yourself and groan his name while pulling him down to lean into his neck. You can’t see the way his eyes roll back at your breath on his neck but you can feel the way he’s already shaking against you. His arms give out, dropping him to press flush against you with a grunt. He apologizes mindlessly, his hips never stopping their steady pace. 
You are surrounded by him, floating away yet grounded by him. You love him so much and he’s been gone for so long. You’re overcome with joy at finally having your boy back in your arms, moaning sweetly into your ear, his adorable little body shaking against you as he fucks his desperate cock into you. He didn’t even know you were missing him so much but he came home early anyway, ready and wanting for you. You feel embarrassment nip at your belly as tears spring to your eyes. You try to bury your face in his shoulder and ignore it, let him keep fucking you as much as he needs. 
You don’t want him to stop and if he sees you’re crying that’s exactly what he’ll do. You’ve never felt so consumed, so wrapped and completely enveloped in love before. You only started to even understand what love was when Eddie started loving on you. You’re so grateful for him and everything he is and his dick is sliding into you so perfectly. He’s bullying your G-Spot every time he thrusts in, his fat tip hitting your most sensitive spot and turning your brain to mush with every movement. 
Your tear slides down your face when he moans your name into your ear like a prayer, like you’re the best thing he ever has or will have. It falls onto his shoulder and rolls off his arm, he slows for a moment, his moans turning into muted pants as he listens and observes. His hips slow even more when he takes in your shaking hands and trembling shoulders. He tries to pull your head from his neck, his pace more of a lazy thrust now but you refuse and that’s what makes him stop completely. “Baby?”
His voice is shaking and scared, his hand is trembling on the back of your head, softly cradling it. You whine into his neck and lift your hips, sinking his cock back into your hole with a hushed moan as Eddie clamps his eyes shut, bites into his lip, and presses his hands on your hips, forcing them back down to the bed. “Can’t fuck you if you’re crying, my love. What’s-” You cut him off with a shaky whimper at his term of endearment and try to explain yourself. 
“Still wan’ it.” You whine to him like that’s the most obvious thing in the world. His hips twitch against you before his cock slowly slides out and back in again. “Yeah?” He questions before speeding up a bit, still keeping a tame, relaxing pace. Your muscles un-tense and your head falls back, exposing your neck to Eddie who happily dives in. “Yeah..” You sigh out as he starts pressing air-light kisses to your sensitive skin. 
“Jus’ missed you so much, Ed.” He whimpers into your neck at the confession and his hips speed up just a fraction. “Needed you all the time but-” You whimper as he bites your skin gently, choosing to use a bit more force on some parts. “But you were so busy- an’-” You moan and dig your fingers in his hair as you feel the coil in your stomach begin to draw in, slowly tightening from Eddie’s thrust and your outpour of emotion and love. “An’ now you’re here and you’re so perfect and so good, Eddie.” Your eyes roll back as you lock your legs behind Eddie’s waist forcing him to keep his cock pressed into you fully, making you feel so full. His thighs are jumping at your words- so innocent but somehow have more effect on him than any dirty talk he’s heard before. 
He pulls his head out of your neck, little droplets of water littering his long lashes. “Missed you too, doll.” His words are a rough whimper against your lips before he dives in, his hips now moving at a new speed, reinvigorated by your love. He’s kissing you messy, basically just pressing his lips against yours and fucking you, your tongues are everywhere, trying to taste everything and making a mess of both of your faces, all while his hips fuck into you with mind-blowing precision, sending tsunamis of pleasure through your bones on every thrust. 
The coil in your stomach tightens even further, reaching the point of no return as your legs tighten around him again. You try to calm down, to keep your pussy from fluttering around Eddie but his knowing chuckle in your ear breaks your resolve, and your pussy spasms around him. “Yeah. Felt like you were trying something.” He reangles himself and adjusts his thrusts, changing them to a slow, hard grind so he stimulates your clit, bringing you to the edge closer than you expected. 
Your hands fly to his shoulders, your nails grip him and he groans against you, his eyes rolling back with a gut-wrenching smirk on his face. “Mmm- Mark me up, sweetheart. I-” He breathes out a desperate breath of air, inhaling you instead with a strained whine before dropping into your neck again. His hips grow a bit frantic and his whines turn to rabid grunts as he fucks into you with everything he has, trying to hold off his orgasm as you moan and twitch around his overly sensitive cock. 
“Cum all over me, baby.” It’s a request and Eddie was ready to beg but you let go at his first utterance. You explode all over him, he has to reach up lightning fast to slap his hand over your mouth as your eyes cross and you moan, completely debauched into his hand. He grunts out against his hand, biting his lip to try and hold his sounds in as you soak his dick, squeezing him erratically as you cum. He tries to hold back, let you finish basking in your orgasm before pouring his seed into you but your muffled sounds are too much. He whines out curses and moans of your name against the back of his hand as you moan for him into the other side. 
His hips slam into yours one last time to push himself as deep as he can go before his cock explodes. He doesn’t know how he had so much cum inside him but he’s sure it’s going to overflow. He can’t even think as his orgasm tears through him, he can hear you encouraging him distantly and it forces another load to rack through his body. His balls are painfully tight as he tries to give you everything he has, completely empty his balls into you. It’s all for you anyway. He lets you know too, it’s the only thing he’s able to mutter to you as he cums. “S’all f’you, baby. All for you.”
He whimpers against you with a few more tremors shooting through his body before wrapping his arms around your waist and rolling onto his back with a sigh. You giggle softly and try to climb off of him but you get a groan of protest. “Eddie, m’heavy, baby.” You smile as you speak, letting your fingers run over his wet, pink lips. He snorts in response. “Liar.” He readjusts his position, sinking into the bed some more, wrapping his arms tighter, and falling asleep. You pretend to be upset that you’re left with no option but to cuddle with him until you fall asleep in his arms. 
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Thank you so much for reading! If you enjoyed it, here's the rest of my Kinktober Works, and be sure to check out my Main Masterlist!!
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moonsaver · 2 months
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Good day moon! Okay I normally don't do asks when it comes to yandere cause it's not my usual thing but seeing the last post you made of Yan!Sunday and his darling, that one where he just desperately wants to have that normalcy in their relationship but couldn't ever have it because of what he's done, made me think of something rather angsty; like how the darling's backlashes against his affections would probably go turn for the worst as time passes on, they don't hate him in a sense because he's really trying hard to not make them hate him and they can see that his love is real (just really fucked up) but that deep urge to hurt the person who took their freedom away is still there, it wouldn't just go away just because he loves them so much that he wouldn't dare to break them. Oh that satisfaction on seeing Sunday looking so hurt after yelling at him, they know it doesn't make them any better than him but at that point, what else is there for them to lose? Maybe in hurting him so subtly, they may find some pity in themselves for him to actually give him some semblance of love but until then, all Sunday ever receives from them are either silent treatment or backlash
Such relationship could only thrive in the worst way possible and maybe Sunday knows that but even then, he still holds out that little (delusional) hope that maybe his darling will still love him someday
Sorry for the rant, it's just that I feel for Sunday but his method will never work and it'll just deeply hurt him and his darling in the end asgfjgsfg also if it's alright, I'd request this but I'll leave it to you with how you write it, be it an imagine or anything else since I'm fine with it!
- Elys
Hello Elys! Im so sorry it took a long time for me to get to your request lol, tons of things got in the way but I remembered this request for a while.
In any case, I feel you've summed it up quite well!
Sunday isn't harsh or as brutal as I imagine him. Unlike my [i have to self advertise here, sorry HAHA] soft yan!blade, Sunday most likely wouldn't even need a bit of working around to be a softer yandere.
He's so loving, it's painful. His love is like despaired poetry for a lover who is still alive, just further than their reach. I imagine his love to be very tender, even as a yandere, if he doesn't become even softer.
And it's hard to convince him he's wrong – mainly because he already knows. But rather that's a bit distorted in his view; instead he thinks it's a wrongdoing against your nature as someone who wants to be free, but correct in the context of the situation rather than actually understanding it is absolutely wrong in general. And he doesn't budge. He's stubborn, almost infuriatingly. And instead of getting angry, I imagine he rather looks disappointed or disgruntled, which somehow does more damage/strikes more fear than anger.
And it's still heartbreaking; frustratingly for both of you, not just yourself.
You lash out, you scream, cry, wail, argue, relentlessly push and resist against him. it's your only way of getting back at him, you're sure as hell you're going to strike the hardest that way. And you relish the hurt you see in the eyes of your captor, but something more sympathetic tugs at you when you see his lovingly sad eyes. It's this cacophony of guilt, frustration, anger, and utter despair at the loss of your freedom. Sunday feels all of it, aswell, and you want to be relieved that he does – if it weren't for the fact he still wasn't letting you go.
He continually withholds your freedom from you. That single injustice to you is enough to weather your patience over time – your anger only burns hotter and hotter, pushing away any semblance of sympathy or reasoning, and it only hurts Sunday more, until you realise what you're doing, and quietly give in to sooth him for the time being. Just a little. Until that little injustice starts bothering you again. It's a toxic cycle.
And it hurts even more when Sunday tries to find normalcy in your relationship; he's trying so hard to be your lover, to hold you gently and bathe you with care, to dry you off and still love you after seeing you bare. He wants to come home and see you smile, be happy, elated that he's there, just as he feels when he sees you. But that's not what happens. His delusions and flimsy expectations are shattered the moment he steps into the dimly lit room, your form refusing to even look at him. The silence is strangely stronger than his hopes.
Anyways, that's all i can think of at the moment. I love angst yandere sunday time.
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austinswife · 9 days
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ALWAYS YOUR SECOND CHOICE - ‘Buck’ Cleven
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SYNOPSIS — In the final days before Gale "Buck" Cleven leaves for war, you can no longer ignore the ex-girlfriend who has been a constant presence in his life—always pulling him away, always his priority. After months of feeling like a second choice, you finally confront him about his divided loyalty. But the truth that unfolds is even more painful than you imagined, leaving you questioning whether your love is enough to hold on to.
WARNING(S) — Themes of betrayal, jealousy, and insecurity, heated, emotionally charged dialogue, emotional turmoil, heartbreak, unresolved tension, possible relationship breakdown.
fia’s note: rewatched ‘masters of the air’ and felt like maybe i should write somehing angst so please don’t hate me. possible of part 2 (not sure)
𝜗𝜚 ALL FEEDBACKS, IDEAS SUGGESTION — TO AUSTINSWIFE
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You stood by the window, arms crossed tightly against your chest, watching as the last light of the day faded into a dusky orange. Buck was late again. Of course, he was. She had called earlier—again and you already knew where he was. You didn’t even have to ask. You’d been through this before, too many times to count.
The door creaked open behind you, and you turned to see Buck stepping into the room, wiping his hands on his jeans. He froze the moment he saw the look on your face—like he knew what was coming but wasn’t ready to face it.
“Y/N…” His voice was careful, too careful.
“You’re late,” you said flatly, your voice devoid of emotion, though your heart pounded in your chest. You were holding on by a thread, and you knew it.
“I know. I’m sorry,” he said, tossing his keys on the table. “She just—”
“She just what, Buck?” you snapped, cutting him off before he could even finish the sentence. “Needed your help? Needed to talk? Needed you?” The words dripped with bitterness, the anger you’d been bottling up for months finally spilling over. “Because, God forbid, Marge ever doesn’t need you.”
He sighed, the familiar look of frustration crossing his face. “Y/N, come on. This isn’t fair. She’s going through a rough time. You know that.”
“And when is she not going through a rough time?” you shot back, stepping closer, eyes blazing. “Every time something goes wrong in her life, you’re the first person she calls. You’re always there for her, but when it comes to me? You’re never here, Buck. You’re always running to her.”
“It’s not like that—” he started, but you weren’t done.
“Then what is it like?” Your voice cracked, the emotion breaking through despite your best efforts to hold it back. “Because from where I’m standing, it looks like she’s the one who really matters to you.”
Buck’s eyes hardened, his own frustration building. “That’s not true, Y/N. You know it’s not like that.”
“Then explain it to me!” you shouted, taking a step closer, your fists clenched at your sides. “Explain why every time she calls, you drop everything and run to her! Explain why I’ve spent the last few months feeling like I’m competing with someone who isn’t even supposed to be part of our lives anymore!”
He opened his mouth to respond, but no words came. The silence stretched on, his hesitation speaking louder than anything he could have said.
“See?” you said, your voice quieter now, broken. “You can’t. You can’t explain it because deep down, you know I’m right.”
He ran a hand through his hair, shaking his head in frustration. “Y/N, you don’t get it. She’s my friend. She needs me right now. It’s not about choosing her over you.”
“But that’s exactly what you’re doing,” you whispered, your voice trembling. “Every single time, you choose her.”
His eyes met yours, something unreadable flickering across his face. “It’s not a choice. She’s in trouble. I’m just trying to help her.”
“And what about me?” you asked, your voice small, the pain in your chest making it hard to breathe. “What about what I need? You say you’re trying to help her, but what does that make me? Am I just supposed to sit here and wait until you’re done saving her?”
“Y/N—” His voice was softer now, more pleading, but you didn’t want to hear it.
“Why are you always running to her, Buck?” The question hung in the air, raw and vulnerable, the one you’d been too afraid to ask until now. “Why is it always her?”
He sighed, rubbing the back of his neck. “Because she needs my help, Y/N. I don’t know what else you want me to say.”
Your breath caught in your throat, your heart shattering at his words. You felt the anger swell in your chest again, but this time it was mixed with something deeper—something closer to despair.
“No, Buck,” you said, shaking your head as tears filled your eyes. “You’re fucking wrong. It’s not about helping her. It’s because she’s always been your first priority. It’s always been her, hasn’t it?”
His face softened, his eyes filled with regret. “No, Y/N, that’s not true.”
“Isn’t it?” you demanded, stepping closer, tears finally spilling over as your voice broke. “Because it sure as hell feels like it. I’ve spent this entire relationship feeling like I’m second to her. And you’ve done nothing to prove me wrong.”
He shook his head, stepping forward as if to reach for you, but you stepped back. “I love you,” he said, his voice desperate now, pleading. “You’re the one I’m with. You’re the one I want to come home to.”
“Then why does it feel like I’m always waiting for you to choose me?” you cried, the weight of all the pain and insecurity crashing down on you.
“I’ve tried, Buck. I’ve tried to be understanding. I’ve tried to give you space, but it’s never enough, is it? Because no matter what I do, I’m never going to be her.”
His face twisted with guilt, his eyes glassy. “Y/N, it’s not like that. She’s just… she was a part of my life for a long time, and I can’t just—”
“Just what?” you interrupted, your voice rising with a mix of anger and heartache. “You can’t let her go? You can’t put us first?”
He opened his mouth to respond, but the words never came. Instead, he just stood there, helpless, as you poured out the truth you’d been holding onto for far too long.
You took a step back, shaking your head, your voice quivering. "When I was in the hospital, Buck—when I was so sick, have you been there for me?"
He flinched at your words, and you saw the guilt flash across his face, but he didn’t say anything. He couldn’t.
"Okay, you told me you couldn’t come because you couldn’t skip a day at the base. I told myself I could understand that. I could understand that," you continued, your voice choking on the emotion you had held back for too long. "But when she… when she told you she needed your help, you left everything behind in an instant."
Your voice broke as the tears spilled freely down your face, your heart splitting wide open.
"It hurts so much, Buck. It hurts too much for me to handle. I can’t keep doing this, always wondering where I stand. I don’t even know if I’ll ever heal from this, because the more I love you, the more it hurts."
“Y/N…” His voice was thick with emotion now, but it wasn’t enough. His words weren’t enough.
You looked at him, your heart aching with every beat. “I deserve better than this, Buck,” you whispered, your voice barely audible now. “I deserve to be someone’s first choice, not their backup plan.”
“You are my first choice,” he said, his voice cracking. “Y/N, please—”
“No,” you said firmly, wiping at your tears with trembling hands. “If I were your first choice, we wouldn’t be having this conversation. If I were your first choice, you wouldn’t be running to her every time she snaps her fingers.”
Buck looked at you, his eyes pleading, but you could see the conflict in him, the way he wanted to be there for you but couldn’t bring himself to let her go. It was written all over his face.
The silence stretched between you, heavy and suffocating, until finally, you shook your head, the decision made for you.
“I can’t do this anymore, Buck,” you whispered, your voice barely audible now. “I can’t keep fighting for a place in your life when already taken.”
His face crumpled, and for a moment, you thought he might fight for you. But he didn’t. He just stood there, torn between two worlds, unable to choose.
You took a shaky breath, the finality of your decision settling in. But even as your heart shattered, you couldn’t help but care for him. That’s how it had always been. No matter how much he hurt you, you loved him. You couldn’t turn that off. Not now, not ever.
“I hope you come back safe, Buck, truly” you whispered, your voice breaking with the weight of unshed tears. “I hope you survive the war, and that you come back whole.” You hesitated, your throat tight.
“But I won’t be here waiting for you.”
His breath hitched, his eyes wide with shock and pain. “Y/N, don’t—”
“I have to,” you interrupted softly. “Because I deserve to be someone’s first choice, Buck. I deserve to be more than just someone you run to when she’s not calling.”
The tears fell freely now, but you didn’t wipe them away. You let them fall as you gave him one last, lingering look—the man you loved, the man you couldn’t stay with.
With one final, heartbreaking step, you turned and walked out the door, leaving behind the love you thought you had and the life you had to let go of.
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maissafespace · 1 year
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I know you.
Shigure Sohma x Reader
synopsis: Shigure Sohma, a complicated man with a lot of secrets, knowing him gave you everything, from love to happiness to frustration and pain. It can’t help that you cannot get away from him.
warnings: age gap relationship. angst. mean!shigure, domestic fluff, heartbreak, arguments, mentions of break up, mentions of cheating (not happening). nsfw. emotional s*x, doggy style, missionary, cream pies, mentions of pregnancy, breeding.
a/n: it’s a brief story for one of the men that has my heart, but unfortunately is in a unique situation with a person I loathe lmao. It’s something that I needed more than anything, I haven't written for some time so I hope it's decent. please like, comment, reblog, tip! thank you for reading!!!!
Masterpost • Masterlist
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Living as a zodiac and as a Sohma, Shigure never saw anything beyond the walls of the clan when he was young, and he never thought about it either.
When he was kicked out after the whole thing with that woman and the other as well, he had no option but to. He had to find a house, find a job, a routine to follow, to live a life as a normal human and not one of the zodiac.
In that, he could not forget to fill his own release. How to pass time when he had the time to distract himself.
First, it was his few flees here and there, Mayu as well. But nothing and no one that made him feel less like the dog of the zodiac, only loyal to one woman in mind. No one was ever serious enough or enough in itself.
The appearance of the kids was a welcomed distraction but not ‘it’ yet, it was another failure. Their fights, their presence made him observing of what the zodiac was, therefore made her existence even worse and far more amplified.
When he met you, nothing changed at all at first. You were and are younger than him, just another woman, meeting him during your first year in uni in a random cafe in the city while he was 25.
It took you a bit of time to actually talk to him, to get the glances and looks to have an effect, to have him take you seriously at all beyond an 18-year-old looking at a slightly older man.
Maybe at that moment you were looking for a distraction from the workload as well, he doesn’t know really the motive behind your pursuing.
But he knew that neither of you were actually taking the situation seriously, it was all out of lust, for him to not think of Akito and the curse, for you to probably not think of family and your own problems.
Things weren't supposed to be taken seriously.
Yet, after three years, here he was, thrusting into you deep and hard, groaning into your mouth as he muffled your moans and made everything echo with the slick on your skin.
Your legs spread apart, feet planted on the futon while his hands pinned yours down. Chest against chest. Forehead against forehead.
You knew his secret.
His attraction grew even more after the discovery, you stayed and listened, you stayed and understood, you stayed and didn’t care.
You stayed.
He knew the difficulty in it though, you were a very affectionate person, for years you wanted to hold him, the man that was making your head go crazy but you couldn’t without ending up with the cute version of his dog.
Because while it was at least something, after years, and a title, it was still frustrating.
As he fucked you thoroughly, he could see the way your legs twitched every time to wrap around him and feel the most. He wanted it too, feel your legs tightly around himself, feel your arms around his back and leaving all the marks you wanted.
As he spilled into you, hands firmly on your waist, digging into your flesh as he pushed as deep as he could, he showed you the same amount of want and need. The marks perpetually being left on your skin, everyday you saw them, every time you remembered that none other would fit them as his hands would.
Panting against your chest, he was feeling your nails brushing through his hair, your lips leaving light pecks on the crown of his head.
It was an experience looking into your eyes every time. He never felt as overwhelmed as in those moments.
So much care and love that he probably shouldn’t deserve for who he truly was. He had told you things but not nearly as everything as he should have.
His head was still split into his zodiac and human, but now there was you, thinking of Akito felt like a betrayal each time, he felt shame that he still couldn’t figure out a way to break this curse and shame of feeling a pull that he would never feel with you. It was something unique with Akito, unfortunately and till then, when she called he would be with her as she wished.
While nothing physical had happened, that was the bare minimum. Just his thoughts were near enough awful for someone in a relationship, he couldn't do anything about the chain that tugged when she wished even in moments like these, where he had the only woman who truly loved him unconditionally with him, making love to her.
Much that he only snapped out of it when he felt you push him off your body. Scrambling around with the sheet covering yourself to find your clothes while he just closed his eyes with a sigh, knowing he had fucked up royally, his hand going to his face, eyes looking down with guilt and then at you, putting on his t-shirt and pants with your shoulders going up and down irregularly.
"I'm sorry." Is all he could say.
"It's not enough." You said with a crack in your voice. "I understand, okay? I do, I did for three years but I can't just ignore it every time. I know she's in your head but where am I? Are you wishing it was her? Are you just doing this out of pettiness? Are you just wasting my time? Am I wasting my time with a man that cannot stop thinking of his ex lover even when we are having sex? Did you cum because of her or me? These are all the questions that come to mind whenver this happens, I'm tired of it, Shigure." Tears were freely rolling down your cheeks, looking at him with sadness and disappointment as he just felt guilt. He couldn't even hug you.
"I know it's not enough but I'm trying. I don't want to think of her, I don't want to, I want to be with you. Why do you think we are where we are now? I want you, but I cannot stop that! I cannot break it." He said through frustration.
"And I get it! But you cannot expect me to not be hurt!" You said back to him.
The room fell in silence. When your breathing regulated, you started to walk off to the door, but he held you back by the wrist. "Where are you going?"
Snatching it back. "I will sleep with Tohru. I cannot be with you tonight."
You closed the door behind you. Shigure just fell back into bed, hunched over as he repressed the need to scream in frustration. He didn't want to admit defeat, unfortunately whenever this happens, he would lose you for three days at least.
He could not do anything, he had not found the way to break the curse yet. He was really trying, for you and for him to live a normal life. He was also sure that it will still take time for it to happen after he discovered a way.
He slept sporadically in the night, waking up every hour and hoping to find you back on the other side of the bed, but it was always empty. In the early morning he woke up and walked down to find the kids all up and about, you were with Tohru by her side wearing his long sleeved shirt and his sweatpants, with your hair wet after what he assumed was a relaxing shower whenever you felt stressed.
Tohru greeted him as gently and kindly as always, Kyo and Yuki doing the same with less enthusiasm, you stayed quiet, he only met your eyes briefly, recognizing the puffiness and the slight redness you tried to cover up, looking away as quickly as possible.
The kids knew to not ask. They ignored whatever had happened every time it happened. Breakfast happened as normally as it would've.
When the kids were gone, so were you, locked up in your shared room with him as you worked from your computer, he knew already he had to stay out of it, he stayed in his study room, writing when he could not do nothing but think to how fix things with you this time.
The first two days went exactly as he predicted, each of you staying in your own spaces, not a word said between you two. He felt anger that you got mad at something he could not control at all and frustration that he could understand it. He saw you each day with the same puffiness around your eyes.
The third was not as he imagined, after the kids went to school, he waited for you to walk up the stairs and disappear till they returned, instead you spoke to him. "We need to talk, Shigure."
Those words didn't inspire faith in him, just fear. Hearing his full name from your lips felt even worse, whatever it was, it was not something he probably wanted to hear.
You two sat in front of each other in his studio, in silence, heart racing in both your chests as you tried to find the right way to put it out. But there wasn't a right way, so you just said it.
"We should break up."
Your words felt like a bucket of ice poured onto him. His eyes widened and he spoke without even thinking. "No."
"I'm not asking, Shigure."
"I said no. I'm not breaking up with you, I don't care whatever you have to say about it, I am not ending my relationship with you." He said, anger visible in his eyes. "We are happy."
"If you think happy means having an argument every two weeks because of another woman, I doubt and am scared of your definition." You said with a chuckle.
"Are you unhappy?" He asked directly.
"I'm not happy entirely." You swallowed. "We have our happy moments, I know, everything apart from this is perfect. But I just can't overlook it every time. It hurts, Shigure, I feel it breaking me all the time physically and emtionally." You said to him. His jaw clenched.
"I'm trying, it's not something I asked for. I want to break it as much as you do and live a fucking normal life."
"And how much time is that going to take? A year? Two years? Five? Ten? Never?! I am 21, I am young and have time to start and build something with someone else, Shigure. I'm not wasting time being your second choice, I will want to get married and have children. What will happen then? Akito will have me end up like Kana and then what, Shigure?"
"You're not a second choice-"
"I am if there is another woman in your heart and mind. Because there shouldn't be. I do not have another man pop up every now and then to which I cannot say no, to which I cannot not accept advances from."
"You know, nothing ever happened. Don't start that shit with me, Y/N. You won't end up like Kana, I won't let Akito get close to you, I made sure of that for three years and Hatori knows he cannot. This conversation is over, I'm not breakiing up with you, forget it." He got up and started to walk away.
"Shigure. Shigure. Shigure!" You yelled following after him up till you were in your shared bedroom. "Stop behaving like this."
"I told you I'm done with the conversation."
"But I'm not. Can you not understand that I'm hurting and we have no way to know if this will end up in tragedy or will work out."
"Do you think I don't want that? I just want to have a fucking life, away from that, now that I'm with you. I did think of it, I want to get married and have a family with you, I just need time to figure this out and break it." Tears rolled down your cheeks at the thought of not having that.
You had fallen in the deep end with him.
"I'm not throwing away the best thing that happened to me." He said sincerely, with fear in his eyes as he looked at you. "I know things are not the best right now, but we endured it and I'm not giving up."
You sniffled, frusteation growing in you as well. "What if I want to get married right away?"
"Then we will get married, tomorrow if you want."
"First you'll have to get permission from the head of the family." You spit back at him.
"I don't care. I've been kicked out, despite being called back from time to time, I call all my choices. I'm marrying you, whether you want it or not, tomorrow or whenever you think it's right." He shrugged. Your jaw clenched.
"What if I was pregnant? What would happen then when you get called back, when she finally wants you openly because she will not want you with another? Where do we end up? Shigure, just understand, for once, things will not change." Your voice had some sincerity, his eyes narrowed at it. Looking at you up and down.
"Are you?" His voice was hoarse, in disbelief.
"I said if I was."
"And I'm asking if you actually are." He just looked at your frown, the veil of tears that was buidling up in your eyes as you shut your mouth in a thin line instead of giving him a proper answer. "You are." He said taking a step towards you, as you took a step back.
"I don't know if I'm keeping it, don't get your hopes up, I'm not raising a child in these conditions." Your words held bitterness. "You didn't even want anything when we started our relationship, you didn't want the committment, I'm sure a child was not in it as well."
"Things changed you know that. For fuck's sake we live together, how do I not want committment? With you? I just told you I'd marry you tomorrow if you want. I'm 28, a child is not going to scare me off and make me break up with you. It's just making me love you more."
Your breathing became visibly irregular from the anger or frustration he didn't know. But you had only given him a reason more to fight for you. "Gure, please." You just cried, breaking. "I am scared." Your head fell down, eyes shutting as you cried.
Despite it, he understood. He understood your fears, he understood that you were scared, you were young, pregnant and in a relationship with a man that it's chained to a woman he grew to despise, and that could not touch fully without becoming a dog.
His gaze softened, walking towards you and leaning his forehead down to the top of your head, the most intimacy he could give you, kissing your head. "I love you. I truly and incredibly am in love with you." His hand slid on top of your flat stomach. Your hand going on top of his. "I'm here with you, just hang with me a little more."
You faced him, lips colliding with yours as you locked in a burning kiss. Your hands quickly pulling down his yukata from his shoulders, pooling on his waist as your nails quickly dug into his skin as always giving him indication of your need for him.
It wasn't long after that you both found yourselves naked on the bed, his cock into you as he dug his fingers into your thighs to keep you down and yours in his shoulders in a position where it didn't trigger it.
His length going in and out of you deeply, whispering sweet things into your ears as you just moaned his name, making something snap in him, something he wasn't quite sure of.
"Mine, mine..." He repeated as changed and pounded from behind you, his hand keeping your head to the side, looking at you fucked out state as he erased any idea of breaking up from your mind.
He felt the pull, growing restless to have his attention, but he just couldn't, he was caught up, he had you, he had you forever, and with you he had a child that was enlarging his own proper family, that tied you in a way that he cannot be tied with anyone else, his dream of a normal life with you and away from everything else.
A tear fell down his cheek as you moaned out his name coming on his cock as he kept going in and out of you sloppily, reaching his own point of release as he came deep in you, spilling his seed in you once again, feeling the knot releasing and something completely breaking in him.
You both panted for air, crying silently and he fell on you, the urge in him to hug you tightly.
So he did, he hugged you.
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phillydilly · 1 year
Text
Priorities
⊹♡— in which Charles and his long distance girlfriend get into an argument over her priorities
Part 1 , Part 2
Charles Leclerc x fem!reader
Authors note: I wrote priorities to challenge myself because I’m not the best at writing angsty situations, but I really hit a bit of a writers block with part 2. I’m happy with how it came out though, I hope you like it!
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The days leading up to the Monaco Grand Prix were filled with an angsty silence between Charles and Y/n. They exchanged their usual good morning and good night texts, sprinkled with "I love you" messages, but the heavy unspoken tension hung in the air like a storm cloud.
Monaco race week was always a special time for Charles. It was his home race, and Y/n had attended every year since they'd been together. This year, however, was different. With the unresolved issues between them, Charles wasn't sure if Y/n would come, and Y/n wasn't sure if Charles even wanted her there.
On Friday, Y/n didn't show up at the track as she usually did. They exchanged a few texts throughout the day, discussing mundane topics and avoiding the elephant in the room. Charles couldn't bring himself to ask her why she hadn't come, and Y/n didn't offer any explanation.
"Charles, I wish I understood what's going on," Y/n texted, her words heavy with frustration.
"I know, Y/n," Charles replied, his thumbs hovering over the keyboard as he debated whether to bring up their issues. But he couldn't find the right words.
Saturday arrived, and there was still no sign of Y/n at the track. Charles's hope began to wane, and he couldn't shake the feeling of heartbreak that gnawed at him. He knew that their relationship was at a crossroads, and he feared that he might have already lost her.
As Charles walked through the paddock, his brother Arthur approached him, concern in his eyes. "Charles, where's Y/n today? She's always here with you."
Charles hesitated for a moment before answering, "We're going through a tough time, Arthur. I don't even know if she's coming."
Arthur furrowed his brow, worried for his brother. "You need to talk, Charles. Don't let this come between you."
On Sunday, the day of the race, Charles woke up with a heavy heart. He knew that Y/n wasn't going to be there for his home race, and it weighed on him as he prepared for the day ahead. He tried to focus on the task at hand, the intense competition of Formula 1, but his mind kept drifting back to Y/n.
Minutes before he was scheduled to get into his car and head to the grid, Charles stood in the paddock, lost in thought. He felt a tap on his shoulder and turned around, his heart leaping in surprise. There stood Y/n, her eyes filled with a mixture of apprehension and longing.
Their gaze locked, and for a moment, it felt like the world around them disappeared. Charles couldn't believe his eyes, and he stammered, "Y/n, you're here?"
Y/n nodded, her voice filled with emotion, "I couldn't stay away, Charles. I know we need to talk, but I didn't want to miss your home race."
Charles's heart swelled with a mixture of relief and joy. He pulled Y/n into a tight embrace, and as he held her, he whispered, "I've missed you so much, Y/n."
Tears welled up in Y/n's eyes as she replied, "I've missed you too, Charles. We need to talk, but right now, let's focus on your race."
Charles nodded, feeling a weight lift off his shoulders. He knew that their conversation could wait, but in this moment, with Y/n by his side, he felt like he could conquer anything.
After the race, Charles finished in sixth place, a result that left him deeply disappointed. He went through his post-race duties mechanically, the disappointment gnawing at him. Normally, he would join the team and fellow drivers for post-race celebrations, but this time, he wanted nothing more than to go home with Y/n.
As they left the circuit and arrived at Charles's apartment, Y/n could sense his despondency. The silence between them was palpable, but Y/n knew that they couldn't avoid the inevitable conversation any longer. She decided to break the ice by giving him a gentle kiss on the cheek. "Charles, I know you're not in the best mood right now," she began cautiously. "But can we please talk about the argument we had at the airport?"
Charles sighed heavily and ran a hand through his hair, his frustration evident. He had bottled up his emotions for too long, and they threatened to spill over. "Y/n, I'm really not in the mood right now."
Y/n felt her patience wearing thin. She had come to Monaco not only to support Charles but also to work through their issues. The tension between them had been simmering for weeks, and it was time to address it. "Charles," she started, her voice tinged with frustration, "I came here because I care about us. I can't just pretend like everything's fine when it's not."
Charles stayed silent, and y/n was started to get the sense that she might have to beg him to talk to her. She was just as uncomfortable talking about this as he was, and she understood that he’s had a tough race, but surely he can understand that they can’t keep bottling up the tension?
“Fine I’ll start” she sighed, “I understand that I should’ve freed up my schedule for our weekend together, and I know that I let you down by prioritising work, but I feel like you don’t take my job seriously.”
That caught Charles’ attention. “How can you even say that?” He said, “I see how hard you work, y/n, but we had planned this weekend together for weeks and you let me down! This season has been the most stressful and exhausting season I have ever done. I’ve been struggling with the car, the team, everything feels like it’s too much,” Charles couldn't contain his emotions any longer. He began to pace back and forth in the living room, his words pouring out like a dam that had burst, "and the one weekend I have time to unwind with the person I love most, she tells me she’s busy? I’ve never felt so lonely.”
Y/n could see the anguish in his eyes, and it tore at her heart, she had never seen him so broken down in all the years she’s known him. She wanted to hold him and comfort him but she knew that this conversation needed to happen first. "Charles, I understand," she said softly, "but I can't just quit my job because you're feeling like shit!"
“God, y/n that’s not what I’m saying!” He yelled, feeling frustrated and unheard, “I just want to know that when we make plans, you aren’t just going to bail on me last minute!”
Y/n didn’t appreciate him yelling at him, and began to feel angry herself, “It happened one time, Charles, you’re being dramatic!”
“Dramatic? I just wanted a fucking break from all the stresses,” he snapped, “something that you have been for me all these years, god forbid I’m disappointed by the fact that you were busy!”
Y/n retorted, “A break? You can’t handle anything, can you? You’re always so damn needy, like a fucking child!”
Stunned by her hurtful words, he took a moment to compose himself, his voice slightly trembling as he responded, “I thought you understood me better than this, but maybe I was wrong.”
Y/n felt her heart sink as she realized the gravity of her words. She had wounded Charles deeply, and before she could say anything more, Charles retreated into another room, leaving Y/n standing there, her heart heavy with remorse.
She knew she had gone too far with her harsh words, and regret gnawed at her. After a few minutes of battling her own emotions, she mustered the courage to follow him.
She knocked gently on the bedroom door, her voice soft and apologetic, "Charles, I'm really sorry for what I said. I didn't mean to hurt you like that."
The door creaked open, and Charles appeared, his eyes still carrying the pain of their heated argument. "Amour, I didn't mean to snap at you either. I've just been under so much pressure lately, and it's been eating at me."
Y/n stepped closer and reached out to hold his hand, her voice filled with sincerity, "I understand, my love. I should've been there for you, and I promise I'll work on balancing work and our time better. But you have to understand that I need to have my own life and career too."
Charles nodded, his grip on her hand tightening. "I know, Y/n. I shouldn't expect you to to just drop everything for me. I love you for who you are, and I want you to be happy."
Tears welled up in Y/n's eyes as she said, "I love you too, Charles, but we seriously need to work on communicating better, I don’t want this kind of tension build up between us again."
They talked for hours, pouring out their feelings, fears, and frustrations, while also reminiscing about the moments that had brought them together. They both realized that their love was strong enough to weather the storms if they were willing to be more understanding and patient with each other.
As the night deepened, they snuggled up in each others arms, finding solace in the warmth of their embrace. The storm had passed, and the skies of their relationship cleared, leaving behind a renewed sense of love and understanding.
Wrapped in each other's arms, Charles and Y/n found comfort in the soft glow of the bedside lamp. The tension that had weighed on them earlier was replaced with a profound sense of intimacy.
Y/n traced her finger along Charles's jawline, her eyes searching his for reassurance. "You know, Charles, I can't stand seeing you upset. I hate when we fight like that."
Charles smiled gently, his hand caressing her cheek. "I know, Y/n. I can't stand it either. I never want to hurt you, but sometimes, my emotions get the best of me."
Y/n leaned in and kissed his lips tenderly. "I understand, love. We both have our moments, and we'll work through them together."
Charles sighed contentedly, his arms drawing her closer. "I'm so lucky to have you. Even when we argue, I can't imagine my life without you."
Y/n's eyes sparkled with affection. "You're my world, Charles. I love you more than anything."
They lay there in silence for a moment, just enjoying the serenity of being together. Charles broke the silence, his voice soft and filled with warmth. "I promise, Y/n, from now on, I'll be more patient and understanding. I'll support your career just as much as you support mine."
Y/n smiled, her heart swelling with gratitude. "And I promise to make more time for us, Charles, to show you how much I love and appreciate you."
Charles's fingers interlaced with Y/n's, and they held each other's gaze, the unspoken promise of their love evident in their eyes.
With a sleepy yawn, Y/n whispered, "Let's put this behind us and focus on the beautiful future we'll build together."
Charles nodded in agreement, his voice filled with tenderness, "Yes, my love. Our future will be bright, and our love will only grow stronger."
They snuggled even closer, their love reaffirmed, and as the night enveloped them, they drifted off to sleep, knowing that their bond was unbreakable, and their love was enduring.
₊˚⊹♡: ⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆
Tags:
@janeholt3 @itsjustkhaos @mirrorball-6 @meadhbhcavanagh @aorifukuzawa @eviethetheatrefreak @dl-yum
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yeoblurbs · 1 year
Text
Honest
Angst with a happy ending & Hurt/comfort
Pairing: Hansol Vernon Chwe x Fem!Reader
WC: 2.07k
Warnings: Small mention of aggressive physical behavior in the first paragraph (not any members), mentions of a child needing surgery, a few curse words, crying, & subtle hints of anxiety
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When Hansol is angry with you, he is honest.
he does not yell; the notion of using a misplaced sense of dominance with a masculine shout is unthinkable to him. he does not grab you aggressively, the thought of touching you in a way that wasn’t intimate and gentle never crossing his mind. and Hansol does not use your feelings against you; words shared in whispers passed through dark nights are kept safe within him, a heart-shaped lock as protection that only you have the key to.
so when Hansol is angry with you, he is calm and honest. except that is what hurts you most. it is the fact that everything he says comes straight from the heart. and while you’re thankful he isn’t explosive when angry, his truthful words find a way to harm you more than he realizes.
“I’m just saying, you could stand to be a little more responsible.” he shakes his head, frowning at you in disappointment. “You’re a grown woman, how can you possibly misplace something so important to me; to us?”
your stomach rolls uncomfortably at the implication that you didn’t care enough about your ring to keep it safe. it wasn’t like you did it on purpose. you know how much that ring means to Hansol especially, having been a family heirloom that has been passed down from generations.
but you worked at a hospital, and had no choice but to take it off each time you walked into a surgery. Hansol knew that, but it seemed you needed to remind him. “Don’t make it sound like that, Hansol,” you say briskly, wiping your cheeks. “You know how much I have to take it off, I just refuse to keep it at home because I want it with me at all times.”
He scoffs, “Well, look how that turned out for you.” and your face crumples miserably at his words.
he goes to grab his keys, and you reach for his arm instinctively, “Where are you going? You’re just going to leave while we’re in the middle of something serious?”
he looks you in the eye, giving you a blank stare as he gently removes your hand from his arm. always so soft, even when he’s angry, you think sadly.
“I think we’ve discussed everything needed already. I understand where you’re coming from, but I’m still upset,” he sighs, and you’re not sure what expression shows on your face, but if it’s anything close to how you feel then you’d assume it is the epitome of heartbreak.
“I’m just going to hang out with Shua today, I’ll see you later tonight, okay?” he says, kissing your forehead when you nod brokenly. and with that, he’s out the door, and you finally allow yourself to collapse into sobs.
how could you have been so stupid? misplacing his mother's ring, the most cherished item Hansol has; something he had given to you, entrusted to you. you ignore the incessant tears cascading down your cheeks and think of what you can do. you need to fix this; you need to find the ring.
-
“Dude, you know you’re not being fair with her, right? You know her profession, she literally has no choice but to remove all the shit from her hands.” Joshua reprimands from his place in his kitchen, Hansol sitting on his couch with a cup of coffee.
He blows on it softly, watching the steam disappear before returning. “I know, I know, but you have to understand why I’m so upset too. That ring meant so much to my mother, so much to me. She showed it to me when I was a child and told me it was meant for the one I love most.” he feels his frustration building again and takes a gulp of his drink.
Joshua walks out of the kitchen, coming to sit on the couch next to Hansol. “I get it, I really do, but don’t you think Y/n is also upset about losing it? You’re making it seem like you are the only person who’s upset and who had an attachment to the ring,” he clicks his tongue, “and I know Y/n loved that ring just as much as you did, otherwise you would’ve never given it to her.”
Hansol sits there processing his words, before putting his mug down on the coffee table in front and rubbing his hands on his face. he knows Joshua is right, and now he feels like an ass. “Fuck, okay. You’re definitely right but I kind of- well I did, invalidate her feelings while talking with her.” he looks stressed when he lifts his head, facing Joshua. “I need to apologize.”
“Well, that much is clear.” Joshua nods, patting his friend on his shoulder comfortingly. “Listen, Y/n is quite literally fucking whipped for you. I have never seen someone so in love,”
Hansol smiles at his words, butterflies erupting in his stomach at the thought of your adoring eyes. Joshua giggles at Hansol's smitten expression, “You just need to apologize and reassure her that she is worth more than that ring, because from what you’ve told me, your last conversation made it seem like you had your priorities fucked.” he shrugs.
“Plus, you leaving instead of reassuring her probably made things worse; in fact, she’s probably crying right now.” he points out, eyeing Hansol’s face and waiting for a reaction; and a reaction he gets.
Hansol immediately stands up, throwing on his sweater and grabbing his keys before running to Joshua and hugging him from the couch, “Thank you so much, Shua. I literally don’t know what I’d do without you.” he mumbles. Joshua pats his head softly, “I know, no need to thank me. Just go get your girl, Nonie.”
Hansol nods and flashes him a gummy smile before slipping on his shoes and running out the door.
Joshua shakes his head from the couch, chuckling to himself, “These kids.”
-
Hansol struggles to get the key from his pocket, balancing a bouquet of pink Lilies in one hand and your favorite food in the other. He manages to get the door open and attempts to be quiet as he places the items on the dining table.
the apartment is silent; he squints his eyes in confusion. “Baby? Y/n?” he calls, opening your bedroom door and finding the bed neatly done without you there.
his eyes scan the entire room before he bolts to the living room, frantically looking for you and realizing you’re not there. he immediately fumbles for his phone and clicks your contact. he puts it to his ear, “Pick up, come on Y/n pick up,” he whispers.
“Hi, sorry, you’ve reached my voicemail-”
he hangs up the phone and decides to text you.
To: y/n<3
[06:30]
Baby??? Can you pick up please? [Unread]
I’m sorry for earlier, but I’d like to talk about it now if that’s okay. [Unread]
[07:30]
I’m trying not to do the over protective boyfriend stuff but i’m getting a little anxious, my love. [Unread]
I would understand if you’re mad at me, but would you please just call me back? Please? [Unread]
[08:25]
You’re worrying me, just tell me you’re okay. [Unread]
Let’s talk about it, please? I’m not mad anymore, I just want you to respond, I’m getting worried baby. [Unread]
[09:00]
Y/n, I’m begging you to just tell someone you’re okay. I’ve called around and no one knows where you are. [Unread]
If you don’t want to come home, that’s fine, but please let us know that you’re safe. [Unread]
Hansol is two seconds from leaving his apartment and physically searching for you himself before the front door opens. his head snaps up, watching you sniffle and hang your coat up, placing your keys on the counter with a sigh.
he walks to you with quick steps, and you jump, startled when you look up and he’s right there. you open your mouth to speak, but he grabs your waist gently, pulling you into him.
“Where were you?! You didn’t pick up any of my calls, I was so fucking worried, Y/n.” he cards a hand through your hair, trying to soothe not only you, but himself.
you overcome your shock and place your hands on his arms, moving away so you can look at him, “I’m sorry, Nonie. My phone died and I didn’t have anyone else’s to use.”
Hansol makes a face at your words, staring at your appearance. your hair is messy, your eyes are swollen, and you look utterly exhausted; Hansol wants to cry at your disheveled look. “Baby, you can’t just go out for hours on end without telling a single person where you’re going, and then not respond to any of your calls or texts.” he flicks your forehead softly and you pout in response.
“I… was thinking about our conversation earlier,” you murmur, and Hansol's face softens. “I had misplaced the ring before an eight-to-ten-hour surgery.” tears fill your eyes again as Hansol cups your face, wiping them before they can fall. “I was so tired, and it was a little boy and I just… my head wasn’t there and I forgot where I placed the ring beforehand.” you sniffle, looking at Hansol's chest to avoid his eyes.
he lifts your face gently with the hand cupping your cheek and pecks your lips once. “I am so incredibly fucking sorry. you did nothing wrong, I was being an unreasonable ass.”
you stare into his irises, bottom lip pushing out as he swipes over it, “It’s okay, Nonie,” you whisper. but he shakes his head in response, “It’s absolutely not okay. You’re allowed to be really freaking mad at me right now, baby. You’re too forgiving.” he smiles, kissing your temple, “But that’s one of the many things I love about you, I guess.”
“You guess?!” you scrunch your nose at him, and he laughs, gums peeking out adorably as he kisses your nose. “I love everything about you, you know that.” your cheeks redden, and you look away with a faux sulk. Hansol is momentarily distracted by the very cute face you are making, when he remembers what he’s been worried about for hours.
“Okay, I understand why you lost the ring, and really, I’m not mad about it anymore, but that doesn’t really explain where you’ve been all these hours.” he reminds gently, tucking your hair behind your ears.
you look up at him somewhat abashed, “Ah… right. So after our conversation, I decided to… look for the ring?” you squeak out the last part, and Hansol looks at you incredulously, “You’ve been searching for the ring for hours?” he shouts, and you shrink in on yourself at his tone.
Hansol sighs when he looks at your expression, lowering his voice, “Baby, I’m really not mad, at least not at you.” he ruffles his hair with one hand. “I’m just so pissed at myself for letting you think you had to go search for it for hours. I wish you didn’t have to put yourself through that.”
he cups your face, drawing you closer as your noses touch, “No ring in this entire universe is worth as much as you. I can replace a ring, heirloom or not; but there is only one you, and I would give up everything for you.”
you can’t help yourself and drag your hand up his neck, into his hair as you pull his head down, lips touching his. he kisses you with fervor; with love, and you smile into the kiss, prompting Hansol to do the same. when you part, he pecks you over, and over again, until you’re giggling and pushing him away as he laughs.
with bright eyes, he grabs your hand and drags you to the couch, forcing you to sit down. you look up at him questioningly, “I bought your favorite, wait here and I’ll reheat it.”
you nod with a smile and he kisses your cheek before running to the kitchen.
that night, Hansol reassures you with more kisses and cuddles, promising you all the love he has to offer. the two of you go to bed, your face tucked into his neck as you breathe in his soft cologne, staring at the pink Lilies sitting in a vase beside you.
you fiddle with the ring on your finger as you smile into Hansol's neck, eyes drooping on the verge of sleep. well, you could surprise Hansol with the ring tomorrow, you supposed, after all, he was yours and you were his, regardless of any ring.
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a/n: well… I ignored the several almost completed drafts I have just to write this in one night. first Seventeen fic, had to do Vernon<3
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calisources · 6 months
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𝐅𝐀𝐌𝐈𝐋𝐈𝐀𝐑 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘𝐀𝐋, 𝐄𝐍𝐄𝐌𝐈𝐄𝐒 𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐑𝐎𝐌𝐀𝐍𝐓𝐈𝐂 𝐁𝐄𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐘𝐀𝐋 𝐐𝐔𝐎𝐓𝐄𝐒.
All quotes are taken from different media about betrayal, heartbreak and future betrayal or the art of it. Some quotes include some foul language so please beware. Change names, pronouns, locations as you see fit for your muses.
It is easier to forgive an enemy than to forgive a friend.
The mistake was mine, for trusting you.
For there to be betrayal, there would have to have been trust first.
I used to advertise my loyalty and I suffered the consequences of it.
I used to open my heart easily, until you broke it.
Why did you despise me?
 You loved me - what right had you to leave me?
He would have killed me.
Then you should’ve died. Died rather than betray your friends, as we would have done for you.
I think I realized that I would rather die because I betrayed them, than live because I betrayed you.
Stab the body and it heals, but injure the heart and the wound lasts a lifetime.
It's hard to tell who has your back, from who has it long enough just to stab you in it.
What was it that you wanted and why didn't you fight for it?
But... do you stop loving someone just because they betray you? 
That's what makes the betrayal hurt so much - pain, frustration, anger... and I still loved her. I still do.
 Maybe I was safe to you, and you needed to feel that.
I could never hurt him enough to make his betrayal stop hurting.
You are going to break your promise. I understand. 
When someone stabs you in the back and then apologizes, accept the apology, but don't give him the knife back to do it again.
I will forget you as soon as my head lays on someone else's arms. 
I would have taken a bullet for you. It just never crossed my mind that you would be the one to shoot.
Don't be nice. Be loyal. Nice can be faked. Loyalty can not.
You got betrayed because love turned you blind.
Don't punish yourself for trusting people and getting betrayed. It's not your fault.
What is more important, that Caesar is assassinated or that he is assassinated by his intimate friends?
It hurts to breathe. It hurts to live. I hate her, yet I do not think I can exist without her.
Was it all in my head?
You are enough to drive a saint to madness or a king to his knees.
Some people are in such utter darkness that they will burn you just to see a light. 
Her only way home was to betray her friend.
I risked, and I lost, but the risk was still worth it.
Could a marriage be happy, standing on a shaky ground of adultery and a disregard for the wife’s feelings? 
When dealing with love and relationship. Hurting and betraying a great woman can lead you to a painful life of regret.
I once met a man who didn't have a heart. He told me he didn't have one.
Do not give your ears to snake they are legless to stand on their own.
Even as your body betrays you, your mind denies it.
When you care about someone, you can’t just turn that off because you learn they betrayed you.
You believed me incapable of hurting you, and yet I did.
I would rather my enemy's sword pierce my heart then my friend's dagger stab me in the back.
Do you ever wonder, do you, why I loved you for such a long time, and still didn’t really know you?
False friends, like weeds, try very hard to appear genuine.
Some scars don't hurt. Some scars are numb. Some scars rid you of the capacity to feel anything ever again.
Whoever controls the king, controls the kingdom.
A man sleeps with another woman, he is praised for it, a woman does the same, she is labeled as a whore.
Innocence like yours attracts snakes, and all they want is a piece of you.
I didn’t know that you were ashamed of me.
My past. My mistake. My regret. My love.
The easiest way to steal something is for it to be given willingly.
I don't want to fall in love with you, because you will use it against me.
Cal betrayed me, and I betrayed him. And you betrayed both of us, in a thousand different ways.
Betrayal isn't ridiculous. It's the reason empires fall.
She is an able negotiator and a strong ally.
That is for what you did to me.
Not as the faceless lover. Not even for today when you made love to me... or perhaps we should call it 'fucking', since there was nothing loving about it, only manipulation
Do you know why he did what he did to you? Because he could.
You’re my prey tonight.
You should’ve paid attention. Princesses don’t trust the dragons, they fall pray of it.
A son for a son, heh. But that's a grandson...and he never was much use.
I can love what is broken.
She is intent on pleasing the men that frighten her.
I’ve given my loyalty before. Too many times now. Always works out the same.
You’ve been moving your lips, but I’ve not heard a word.
I would betray you a thousandfold for her.
A woman should not be trusted. Specially one with such beauty and doesn’t even realize they have.
Because you needed to know that not everything was a lie.
Did he touch you like this?
Yes, but that's how he always touches me. He would n-never…
Maven is his mother's son.
I gave him so much-parts of myself I didn't even know were there.
The only betrayal I ever did was being my mother’s child.
We made a bargain. I give you over, and he agrees to let my forces enter Prythian through his territory.
Having faith in your spouse does not lead to trust, truth does.
You may not have loved me,but I loved you, and my love was never a lie.
I hope I never meet the guy that did this to you.
If there is a marriage and your husband loves you, there is no other woman. 
From his vantage point on the deck, the commoners were ants.
I will never make the mistake of loving you ever again.
Why the hell would you save that motherfucker’s life?
The only one you protected was yourself.
Yes. I did protect myself. It was about damn time I learned to do that.
Betraying someone once can be a mistake. Betraying someone twice is a choice.
My brother needs to watch where he steps while doing so. And on whom he steps.
You ended one life, but I got another in me.
You think I betrayed you.
You're nothing but a bad habit.
Can’t have love without lust.
Be careful who you follow and treat everyone who come to you as if the have an agenda towards you.
Break his crown, break his throne, rip his monarchy apart.
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whumpshaped · 9 months
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been spinning this idea around in the microwave that is my brain for a while now.
pet/slave/etc whumpee being rescued, seemingly improving and going along with what caretaker asks of them, and then immediately bolting and returning to their master the moment they get the chance.
they feel sorta bad for caretaker, but ultimately where they belong is at their master's side. whumpee's life was miserable and empty before they found them, but with master they were fed, had a warm place to sleep, and were shown more affection than they'd ever experienced before.
whumper, who in this specific scenario is more like a carewhumper/soft whumper, wanting to keep whumpee as their pet/slave but otherwise not being cruel to them, is of course elated to have whumpee back, lavishing them with praise and love and affection, further cementing in whumpee's mind that this is where they belong.
tw pet whump, conditioned whumpee, stockholm syndrome, caretaker new master, betrayal, abandonment
When Whumpee caught a glimpse of the article, it was like colour had suddenly returned into their world. Like the storm clouds had parted and finally allowed the sun to shine through, making all their worries and sadness dissipate.
All charges dropped.
Caretaker seemed to have the opposite reaction, throwing the newspaper across the room and groaning in frustration. Whumpee flinched, alerting them to their presence. “Oh, shit… Whumpee, I’m sorry. I didn’t– fuck, did you see the article?”
Whumpee suppressed their eagerness and slowly nodded, attempting to keep their expression neutral. Whatever Caretaker had interpreted it as, it made them open their arms for a hug.
“I’m so sorry, sweetheart. Would you like a hug? Or… or would you like to talk about it?”
Oh, they wanted to talk about it more than anything, but they doubted what they had to say would’ve been to Caretaker’s liking. They accepted the hug anyway, holding their temporary owner tight for what was probably the last time.
“You did your best,” Caretaker whispered. “I’m so sorry that… that they’re a bunch of incompetent idiots there! You gave all that evidence, all those testimonies… I don’t get it… I’m so sorry.”
“Let’s not talk about it?” Whumpee hoped that was a reasonable request. They hated hearing about all the ways in which they’d betrayed Whumper, but they hoped their reasoning wouldn’t be readily apparent.
“Of course. I’m sorry. I got carried away.” Caretaker took a deep breath, then exhaled slowly, and Whumpee had the feeling this hug was more for their friend than it was for them. “You wanna do something tonight? As a little distraction? We could make those new cookies you found a recipe for. Or watch a movie.”
Whumpee pulled away so they could look Caretaker in the eye. “Would you mind if… if I went for a little walk?”
Caretaker hesitated. “Can it be another time?” they asked cautiously. “I don’t like putting restrictions on you, I really don’t, it’s just…”
“Okay,” they said without knowing what Caretaker was going to say. “Another time.”
They could seek out Whumper any time, right? The sooner the better, but they didn’t need Caretaker following them.
“I’m a little nervous about letting you out of my sight after news like this,” they finished anyway.
“Okay,” Whumpee repeated.
“You’re not mad?”
“Of course not.”
Caretaker smiled and pulled them in for another hug. “Alright. Thank you.”
-
It was two days later when Caretaker finally let them go. It was honestly a little heartbreaking to know they would never go back, but… It couldn’t even compare to that time the police had swarmed the building and took Whumper away from them.
Whumper had been their everything. Their best friend. Their owner. The only one who cared. The one who had always provided for them, food, shelter, love. It didn’t matter what others had told them — they had to get back. And now that Whumper was finally let go, they could.
They kept looking over their shoulder, hoping Caretaker really wasn’t following them. They weren’t. They were left to their own devices, and they were about to betray every morsel of trust Caretaker had placed in them.
It didn’t matter. Nothing mattered outside of getting back to Whumper. Whumper was the only one whose trust counted for anything.
They rushed back to the house they’d used to stay in, and the ugly police tape was finally gone. It looked just like the first time they’d seen it: friendly and inviting.
Whumpee walked up to the door and knocked before their anxiety could’ve gotten the better of them. They stepped back and waited, rocking back and forth on their feet, shifting their weight from heels to tiptoes.
The garden seemed a little neglected, but it looked like Whumper had gotten to work since their release. There were fresh seeds in the bird feeder, and fresh water in the bowl they used for any stray creature that might’ve needed a sip. They were so caring. It was ridiculous that any investigation had even been conducted.
The door opened, and Whumpee’s eyes snapped up to meet their owner’s. They jumped into their arms without thinking, burying their face in the crook of their neck. “Master, you’re free!” they exclaimed, delighted when Whumper’s arms closed around their waist.
“I’m free!” Whumper parroted, just as giddy as their pet. “And you’re back!”
“Of course I am! I missed you so much!”
Whumper brought them inside without letting go, pushing the door shut with their foot. “I missed you too, sweet thing. I’m not quite packed yet, but now that you’re here, I’ll try to make it quick so we can leave tomorrow.”
Whumpee pulled away, frowning a little. “Leave?”
“Of course. They’d never leave us alone if we were to stay; not the police, and definitely not Caretaker.” Whumper moved their hands to cup their pet’s cheeks, smiling at them softly. “We’ll go somewhere peaceful, hm?”
Well… When they’d left the house and told themself it’d be forever, that they’d never see Caretaker again, that they were ready to leave all of this behind… They didn’t think it’d be so permanent. So irreversible.
They didn’t think they’d have to leave Caretaker so far behind.
Some of the cookies they’d baked the night before were still waiting for them at home, soft and sweet and tasting of friendship.
“I’d love that,” Whumpee said with a smile of their own. “We can go whenever you’re ready, Master.”
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