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ferigrieving · 15 days

Text

laundry & taxes.

⊹ ࣪ ˖ in which choso kamo finds what it means to be human

⤷ masterlist ; 01. prologue ; 03. coming soon

if you told choso kamo a few months ago ago he would enjoy subjecting himself to spending an hour of his time weekly buying food he didnt even need to eat, he would have laughed in your face.

yet, here he was, embarking on another daunting excursion with you– a trip to the grocery store.

as he ventured into the fluorescent lit aisles of the konbini, choso clutched the crumpled grocery list in his fist, haphazardly written on the walk here. the items scrawled upon it might as well have been written in an alien language for all the familiarity they held for him amidst the shelves lined with unfamiliar kanji.

peeling the grocery list from his hands, you’d smile and say, “so we need eggs, bread and… lettuce.”

“...lettuce?”

“....do you not know what lettuce is?”

choso didnt know how to answer, opting instead to look away ashemedly as you sighed, a smirk playing on your features. “its a leafy green vegetable thats like.. the size of your head. you know how a flower looks like when its still growing? kinda like that.”

you stifled a laugh as he nodded uncertainly, and you knew that he hadnt had a single clue you were talking about, and you walked hand in hand around the store. tofu, almond milk, rice – they might as well have been artifacts from a distant universe for all he knew.

you two navigated the labyrinthine aisles easily, and yet choso couldnt shake being an outsider in this human world. the chatter of shoppers, the colourful packaging, the squeaks of the small carts – it was all so overwhelming. it wasnt his first time at this kobini, nor would it be the last, but he doubted there would ever feel safe in such a place, if any.

choso’s gaze fitted nervously from one display to another, as if a curse would jump out of the fruit stand and take his grocery list and his partner. tugging on your hand lightly, he pointed at a stack of round, leafy greens tucked away in a corner he had spotted, and with a triumphant grin, he plucked a fresh head of lettuce from the pile, handing it to you with a sense of accomplishment.

“okay, what’s next ?” you asked, peering up at the crumpled paper in your boyfriends hands.

choso scanned the list, racing the lines of kanji with uncertainty. he could pronounce all of the words just fine, but it was what they were that bothered him. what the hell was bolognese?

“um.. tofu, rice and...” he brought the list closer, as if the proximity would aid in his reading comprehension “miso paste?”

you nodded, smiling and taking his hand once again, lightly brushing your thumb against the palm as you effortlessly maneuvered the aisles of the kobini.

tofu proved to be a challenge, choso inspecting the different varieties with a mixture of curiosity and confusion. you patiently explained the differences between firm, silken, and fried, nails digging into your skin behind your back as you tried not to burst out into laughter.

next on the list was rice, an asian staple, and you knew for certain that choso at least knew what that was. you’d hope, anyways. you couldnt help but admire the resilience and determination choso showed you when doing anything, even if it just was picking out food to eat. while it was true he was often bewildered by the unfamiliarities of human life, you found yourself drawn to the willingness to learn for you and yuuji.

in your eyes, his curiosity was what made him so endearing, like a puppy that had just been rehoused in an unfamiliar home. you cherished the moments you shared, whether it was exploring the kobini together, or walking home, hand in hand, chatting about everything and nothing.

you watched with a smile as choso marveled at the new array of options, short-grain, long-grain, white, brown, jasmine, basmati, it was almost overwhelming. and if he didnt know any better, with how much rice the two of you went through in a week, he wouldnt have a clue which one to pick out.

as you approached the aisle dedicated to sauces and spices, choso felt that his senses were assaulted by a dizzying array of colours and aromas. a downfall to being a curse was extremely heightened senses, and it seemed that this was the worst possible place for it. bottles and jars of various shapes and sizes lined the shelves, each containing a world of flavours he probably couldnt even begin to comprehend.

“miso paste, love.” you reminded him with a firm squeeze of the hand. he nodded, steeling himself for the difficult challenge of finding a miso paste that would suit your tastes. he couldnt help but feel a surge of trepidation at the thought of selecting the right one.

you guided him through the aisles, pointing out different varieties like you did with the rice – white, red, and mixed. he listened intently, as if he were a student about to take an exam. examining the jars lining the shelves, choso’s gaze was drawn to a small ceramic container tucked away on the bottom shelf.

you didnt know how to tell your boyfriend that the jar in his hand was probably the most expensive variation of miso paste he could have picked out, but it was a price you were willing to pay.

he gingerly placed it in the basket, surrounded by other essentials, and figured that you would stray a bit from the list and buy some fruits. lord knows choso could use a papaya or three with how pale he is.

as you two meandered through the produce section, you indulged choso in every single fruit he found appealing– apples, grapes, oranges. you’d end up having a killer fruit basket by the end od the day.

he’d pick up every single fruit there was, squeezing it lightly and marveling at the different textures. he seemed to be the most enamoured by the peaches, captivated by the soft fuzz. and the dragon fruit, who wouldnt be with how otherworldly it looked.

with a cart filled with brightly coloured groceries, and a list fully filled out, you figured there was nothing else you two needed.

other than sweets, of course.

as you two made your way to the now crowded aisles of the konbini, your eyes fell upon a colourful aisle nestled in the corner of the store– the candies. a tantalising array of sweets and treats beckoned to you, and you watched choso’s face light up with excitement . his eyes flitted nervously between your face and the colourful assortment before him.

“how about i treat you to some candy, love?” you smiled, standing by him with your fingers intertwined.

candy– a concept that was foreign to him as were the depths of the sea. yet he knew that such treat brought you joy, munching on it nearly every waking hour. the prospect of sharing the indulgence with you filled him with a sense of intrigue. he marvelled at the variety of options – gummies, chocolates, hard candies – each more enticing than the last.

you venture into the candy aisle, eyes sparkling with anticipation. you reached out and plucked a box of meiji strawberry chocolates from the display that you always buy. as you turned to share your excitement with choso, your smile faltered as you locked eyes with choso, standing frozen at the beginning of the aisle, a hesitant expression on his face. you felt your heart twinge with concert over choso’s discomfort over what you figured was the crowd surrounding you.

“...cho’?” you called out gently, voice barely above a whisper. he still seemed startled at the sound of your voice, his features betraying his nervousness. shifting awkwardly on his feet, gaze flickering uncertainly about the crowded aisle.

approaching him cautiously, you took his hand and pressed a kiss to his knuckles, guiding him silently, your touch a steady anchor amidst the roaring waves of people. choso’s heart was still wrought with anticipation, venturing deeper into the aisles. whatever sensory overload he felt at the spices and condiments aisle was nearly tripled in the presence of unprecedented sugar. you felt his grip tighten ever so slightly as you reached the part of the aisle you were just at.

“take your time, love,” you murmured softly, “i’m right here with you.”

he nodded, letting out a deep breath and letting go of your hand to inspect each and every package thoroughly. with your guidance, he made his selection, his fingers closing around a bag of brightly coloured konpeito with newfound confidence.

as you approached the checkout counter, choso paused, a sudden realisation dawning on him. with a furrowed brow, he’d reach into the pocket of his jacket and retrieved the barely legible, barely comprehensible, grocery list, unfolding it with a sense of urgency.

you glanced over to him with curiosity, “what’s wrong, love?”

choso bit his lip, eyes scanning the list once, twice. “i just wanted t’ make sure we got everythin’.”

as you two stood in the line of the checkout, he’d read out loud to you the items you had listed on the paper, features furrowing in concentration as he compared it to the contents of the shopping card.

“egg…tofu…lettuce…rice…” he’d mutter under his breath, finger tracing down the list meticulously.

you watched him with a fond smile, reaching out to squeeze choso’s shoulder in encouragement.

finally, with one person ahead of you, he’d look down at you with a grin, exclaiming that you had gotten everything, a triumphant grin spreading across his face.

with a sense of accomplishment swelling within him, he folded the list and tucked it back into his pocket to add to his junk journal later on, approaching the checkout with a smile still plastered all over his face. one by one, he’d take the groceries and place them in the recyclable bags you had brought, vivid designs plastered all over them.

walking home through the bustling streets of tokyo, bags filled with groceries and more than a small treat for themselves, choso felt a bit of peace knowing that the trip was over. for the next month or so, anyways. and as he held open the door for you to your cosy apartment, sunlight streaming through the dining room, choso couldnt help but feel a sense of gratitude for what he had.

you placed the groceries on the counter by the sink, and with a shared sense of purpose, you and choso unpacked the bags in tandem, placing each item carefully in its designated spot.

choso carefully placed the eggs in the fridge, handling them as if they were bombed primed to explode at any second. meanwhile, you wiped off the meat and placed them in the freezer, thinking of what to make with them when the time comes.

as you two worked, choso couldnt help but marvel at the way you so effortlessly handled the groceries, and he was sure that if there was a olympics for such a thing, you’ d win for sure.

he tackled the lettuce and the other fruits next, carefully rinsing them under the tap like you had shown him, before placing it in the bottom drawer of the fridge. it may have been a simple task for most, but for choso, the mere fact that he didnt have to second guess himself was a win in his book.

with the groceries safely stowed away, you stepped back, only to realise you had forgotten to buy dinner. there werent any leftovers, and you hadn’t got a clue what things to make under an hour. you were unsure on what that could mean, but you trusted him like the sun did the moon.

half an hour later, you found yourself face to face with the local chinese place’s takeout. before you found your wallet to pay, choso was already there, paying and tipping generously before placing the food on the dining room table. he set the table and ushered you over, pressing a kiss to your knuckles before digging in, savouring each bite of the food he had purchased for you.

as you shared the meal, laughter and conversation flower freely, filing the air with warmth and joy. as you finished the meal, choso couldn't help but a sense of contentment wash over him.

although the grocery trip had not gone the smoothest, the evening had turned out better than he had hoped, with good food, and better dessert.

with the dishes cleared away and the remnants of their takeout meal put aside, you both found themselves in a comfortable lull, the quiet of their cosy apartment enveloping you like a warm embrace.

as you two settled on the couch, choso reached for the remote control, his fingers hovering over the buttons as he glanced over at you. "any movie preferences tonight, love?" he asked, a soft smile playing on his lips. you considered for a moment before shaking you head. "nope, none at all today. surprise me," you replied, eyes bright with anticipation.

with a nod, he began to scroll through the list of available movies, his mind whirling with possibilities. He settled on a classic romance film, knowing it was one of your favourites, and pressed play. As the movie began to play, they nestled together on the couch, the soft glow of the screen casting flickering shadows across the room. choso’s arm found its way around your shoulders, pulling you close as you lost yourselves in the story unfolding before them.

with you by his side, even the simplest of moments felt special – a shared meal, a cosy movie night at home, a monthly trip to the konbini.

as the credits rolled and the movie came to an end, you sat in comfortable silence for a moment, basking in the afterglow of the shared experience. with a yawn, you stretched and leaned his head against choso's shoulder, a soft smile tugging at you lips.

"thank you for tonight, cho’," you murmured, his voice filled with warmth and affection. choso smiled back, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead.

"anytime, love. i’m just happy to be here with you," he replied, his heart overflowing with love for the person beside him.

and as they settled in for the night, the quiet of their apartment wrapping around them like a blanket, choso knew that no matter what tomorrow brought, they would face it together, hand in hand.

#⊹ ࣪ ˖ greywrites #⊹ ࣪ ˖ laundry & taxes #ending was lowkey cheesy mb fazgang #jujutsu kaisen #jujutsu kaisen x reader #jjk #jjk x reader #jjk x you #choso kamo #choso kamo x reader #jjk choso #choso jjk #jujutsu kaisen choso #kamo choso

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idyllic-affections · 11 months

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i know my kingdom awaits, and they've forgiven my mistakes.

summary. "Baizhu reached out to their shoulder, giving it a tender squeeze. "I just want to know why you left so abruptly. We were so close. There is nothing you could say or do that would make me resent you."" trigger & content warnings for self-hatred, severe blood, major traumatic life events, depictions of trauma, panic attacks & a fuck ton of crying, implications of suicidal ideation but it is never explicitly stated in an obvious way, overall heavy on the themes of mental health, heavy spoilers for baizhu's story quest and childe's character stories, [name] is called pretty once. tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. friends to strangers to friends, hurt/comfort. baizhu & childhood friend!reader, brief hints of childe & reader. 10k words. they/them pronouns for reader. author's thoughts. it is here. the fabled "friends to something significantly worse to friends again" fic is finally here (june if you're reading this, thank you for the idea lmaoo <33). btw! this post runs on the theory that skirk is associated with khaenri'ah. no idea what her personality is like so.... bear with me pls. she gives off "tired, bitter big sister" vibes in this fic. at one point, nightmare by set it off started playing while i was writing this and i think thats so fucking funny, that is so childhood friend![name]core. a LOT of ironic songs played while i was writing this actually! maybe ill make a post about it?

"What's the last thing on our list?"

Surely the sky had been painted by the Celestial Gods above—how else could one even hope to explain the otherworldly beauty it held? Pinks blended smoothly in with hues of golden orange and baby blue as the sun crept lower and lower towards the horizon. A few stars already dotted the evening sky, twinkling and sparkling against their background.

In the reflection of their eyes, the light danced.

Their friend hummed thoughtfully, brushing some of his hair away from his face, before scanning the words written in practically illegible handwriting inside the little journal the two's shared master had given them. "Violetgrass... I think."

"You think?" they echoed, amused, peering over his shoulder into the notebook. He shrugged.

"Master's handwriting isn't exactly... er, legible."

They giggled at that. "No doctor's is. I think it has something to do with how many prescriptions they have to write on a daily basis. Like... they have to write fast, so they have some kind of language of their own to be as efficient as possible."

"Is that so?"

"...Honestly, I don't know. Something like that, I guess."

He smiled at them, teasing, "Shouldn't you know better than anyone, [Name]?"

"Shut up, Baizhu, I'm still learning!" they huffed with faux annoyance, snatching the book from his hands. "Yeah, that says Violetgrass. Hm... you should probably go back, then. It's getting kind of late," they mused, meeting the boy's gentle burgundy gaze. "I've got it from here."

"Are you sure?" he asked. "I don't mind going with you."

"I'm sure. I get Violetgrass on my own all the time. It gets cold at night, and with everything going on, it's probably better that only one of us goes out. Less of a chance of the sickness spreading further, you know?"

"I can't really argue with that," he admitted. "Alright, but don't stay out too late."

"Don't worry," they reassured, "I don't intend to."

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

Darkness had fallen by the time they reached their normal spot for gathering Violetgrass. Specks of glittery stars dotted the night sky; it took all of their mental strength to not sit and admire it. They would never get their task done if they did.

'The last time I did this with my bag on, I fell.'

With that thought in mind, they hummed and carefully took the cross-body bag filled to the brim with medicinal herbs off. They set it neatly to the side. Before beginning, they stretched, hoping to somehow make themselves more flexible and limber by doing so. A series of satisfying pops were released from their bones.

It was then that they began gingerly scaling the cliffside—it wasn't impossibly steep, and they'd done it an abundance of times in the past, so it didn't present too big of a challenge. It wasn't anything they weren't used to.

The ground then unexpectedly trembled beneath their feet. They huffed as their foot slipped, sending them sliding down a few feet and back onto solid ground. The single piece of Violetgrass that they needed seemed to mock their failure from its place several feet above them.

"Aw, come on..." they murmured, slightly frustrated. "Maybe I should have had Baizhu stay and help..."

Then, again without warning, just as they were about to make another attempt, the ground split open.

A scream was torn from their throat as they fell. It was as if Teyvat itself had swallowed them into its core. They made a a desperate attempt to reach for the surface, but as soon as they were in, the crack snapped shut once again. No matter how fast they fell, no kind of ground ever seemed to get any closer. Briefly through their terror, they wondered if this was how they'd die—falling into nothingness for eternity until they starved, mortal body eventually decaying into nothing and becoming one with the never-ending emptiness.

This was never meant to be how they'd die. Their death was supposed to be fated through Changsheng's contract, not through... this.

A sob ripped through their throat as their body unexpectedly slammed into the ground. Upon impact, they knew at least a handful of bones in their wrists had broken. Perhaps it was unwise to brace their fall with their wrists, but then again... it would have been far worse if they landed on their back. Breaking their back may very well have been a death sentence in the scenario they were in. Honestly, they were just thankful that their shoulders and forearms seemed to be okay, aside from a rhythmic throbbing coursing through both arms. Their body trembled pathetically like a leaf in the wind, ready to be blown away at any second. At least a leaf would see daylight or even moonlight.

It was pitch black for them, as if the darkness actively sought out and destroyed any source of light it was capable of finding. It seemed to sap any will they might've had to resist, to find a way out. Their will was gone. It was like it was never there in the first place. The ominous dark took all that determination, all that light, and consumed it like a starved beast until there was nothing but a shell left behind.

A deep pit settled in their gut as they whimpered, curling up into a ball. Surely, this was just a dream. An awful, terrible dream. They'd wake up and everything would be normal—they'd still be on the surface, gathering the last of their master's requested herbs before heading back and resuming their life as normal.

Regardless of whether or not this was a horrifying nightmare, sleeping was far more appealing than staying awake.

It was with tears rolling down their cheeks that they tucked their head into their arms, wincing at the shooting pain that ascended the length of their arms when too much pressure was applied to their wrists, and succumbed to the boundless darkness.

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

Time was an illusion.

That's how they felt, at least, because they had no idea how long they had been underneath Teyvat for. It could've been hours or it could've been days—they wouldn't know the difference either way. Everything was fuzzy. Their sleep was restless and interrupted; no matter how hard they tried, they couldn't truly sleep. Even if they managed to fall asleep, they'd wake up again after a few minutes with a jolt and a wave of paranoia. What frustrated them so deeply about it was that they knew very well that their body would never heal if they didn't sleep well. They'd never have the strength to escape if that were the case. It was infuriating.

The distant echo of footsteps made their muscles tense. The sound ceased a few feet away from where they laid.

"You'll never survive down here like this."

A nervous whine threatened to leave their throat. They swallowed it down, hands trembling slightly.

"Get up. I can tell that you're awake."

Fuck.

With what minimal strength they did still have, they pushed themselves up using their elbows. Using their hands would only hurt them more. It was difficult to see, but nonetheless, they could see her eyes clearly. Empty, star-shaped irises stared down at them, piercing the very depths of their soul, picking them apart like some kind of subject of a dissection. The utter bite of her gaze caused them to suck in a sharp breath, posture straightening slightly.

"I've no idea why the Abyss would want someone so... pathetic," she scoffed. "Look at you, resigning to your fate like some kind of lost puppy with its tail between its legs."

"No, I... That's not..." they stammered, trailing off, hoarse voice quick to die out in the face of her frigid sternness. "I'm not..."

"Oh? Am I wrong?"

"No— Yes, I mean, yes, I was... My wrists, they broke when I fell, so... They broke and I don't have anything to fix them with, so I thought resting would be a better idea than running or fighting, and—"

"Alright, alright, stop. Get up. Follow me."

She began to walk away.

"H— huh?"

"You want to survive, don't you?"

They scurried after her before they could have any kind of second doubts.

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

The woman introduced herself as Skirk, a seasoned swodswoman with extensive knowledge about the Abyss and how to survive in it. She had been kind enough (well... it was debatable whether her gesture was out of kindness or due to ulterior motives, but they had no other choice but to trust her) to treat their injuries, stiffly wrapping their wrists so that they could heal properly.

It took about six weeks for them to heal adequately. Within that time, they were surprised to find that they had begun to be able to see through the darkness, as though their eyes had finally adjusted.

They had hoped she would help them get out when they were fully healed, but...

No.

When she asked if they wanted to survive, she sure as hell intended to teach them how to do just that.

"Slow, uncoordinated, weak," she criticized venomously, swinging her blade down at them with great force. She would undoubtedly kill them if they gave her any chance to. If they made one mistake... "Just how do you think you'll get by in this realm when you can hardly defend yourself?"

"I— I didn't have to in Teyvat!" they sobbed, tears streaking down their cheeks from both the pain of the several open cuts and bruises blooming on their skin and the pain of being away from home for so long. How long had it been? They had no clue. Their wrists throbbed as they parried her blade with one of their own. "I was the apprentice of a doctor! I was safe there!"

"Well, you're not safe here. Get used to it," she sneered. "It's kill or be killed down here."

"I don't want to kill!"

"Then you'll be killed."

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

"Stop hesitating. Kill it."

The Abyssal creature at their feet seemed to whimper, trying its best to crawl away from them. It's body was already terribly mangled, limbs broken and twisted in ways they never should have been. Archons know what the eldritch creature even was—they sure as hell had no clue. All they knew was that they felt sorry for it. It looked so small and weak beneath them. 'Pathetic,' a malevolent whisper drifted through their mind, 'it looks pathetic.' With a shake of their head, perhaps in an attempt to rid their mind of such cruel thoughts, cries escaped their throat. Their chest rose and fell in sobbing, labored breaths. All they could hear in their ears was the distinct sound of blood rushing. Their chest ached. Their body ached.

They wanted to go home.

"I can't, Skirk, I can't..."

"You can," she hissed, "and you will."

"No," they cried harder, "look at it! I can't..."

"You can," she repeated, though this time with strange serenity, as she stepped behind them; with her hands, she forced their dagger down into the creature's chest, "and you will."

Blood splattered across their figure as they let out an utterly visceral wail.

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

Soft sobs wracked their figure. The more they tried to suppress their cries, the worse they got.

Many nights were spent in this manner. It wouldn't be the first night they spent crying themselves to sleep, and it was unlikely to be the last. Was it from the pain? The stress, perhaps? They truly didn't know. The only thing they knew was that they could only fall asleep if they exhausted themselves by crying first.

They just wanted to go home.

Then again...

Would they be accepted back? There was blood on their hands now. Fresh blood of a life that had value just like any other before they so cruelly took it away because in Skirk's words, it was 'kill or be killed.'

Would they still be viable for Changsheng's contract?

What if their master was dead by the time they returned?

What if they never returned?

Maybe that would be for the better.

But they wanted to go home regardless.

Then, the first light they saw in what seemed to be ages graced their empty irises. The light was treasured. Without thinking, they trapped it between their palms like one would to a firefly in the night so that it could not escape them.

A cool, smooth stone that most definitely wasn't there before now sat between their cupped hands. The rush of cold against their feverish skin prompted them to peer inside the little cage created by their rough hands.

Inside sat a Cryo vision, still-wet blood smearing over its chilling surface.

That night, they cried harder than they ever had before, clutching the Cryo Archon's blessing like it was some kind of lifeline.

Contrary to what they may have believed at the time, the night they got their vision marked the final night they would ever spend crying themselves to sleep in the Abyss.

That "morning," Skirk would note an evident change in their demeanor.

That "morning" would mark the point at which the Abyss officially reached the depths of their soul, sucking the last of the light from them and changing them fundamentally.

That "morning" would mark the point at which they were no longer Changsheng's next contractee.

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

Skirk taught them much in the first seven months of their time in the Abyss.

The longer they stayed, the warmer she became in her behavior towards them. She vaguely reminded them of their medicinal Master, though she was certainly much tougher than he was. She was not unkind, they had concluded. She was simply hardened. Archons know what she must have been through to be so cold.

Despite all that, she even did them the kindness of celebrating their birthday.

"When you do finally get out," she had said to them that day, "you will find that very little time has passed in Teyvat. Don't be surprised. You'll be a year older mentally, but your bodily age will be about the same as it was when you fell."

"How long has it been since I fell, then?"

Her reply sent chills up their spine, stomach twisting in sheer disbelief:

"Seven days."

Of course, "celebrating" just meant that they got to sleep the day off rather than be relentlessly beat up by the swordswoman. Nonetheless, they appreciated the break.

Ultimately, they had come to the conclusion that she was much different than what they'd initially assumed.

They'd taken it upon themselves to patrol around what Skirk considered to be her "territory." They'd chuckled a bit to themselves when she described it in such a way, but said nothing, only offering to patrol in her place for the day as a favor. Allegedly, that was how she encountered them all those months ago.

They were surprised to find that they, too, encountered a poor victim of the Abyss. It was a boy; if they had to guess, they would say he was somewhere around their age, maybe slightly younger.

'Is this what Skirk saw when she looked at me? Archons, no wonder she looked like she was going to tear my throat out,' they mused absently, unblinking void eyes staring down at the ginger boy on the floor in front of them. He looked like he wanted to say something but simply couldn't force the words out. 'He really does look like a lost puppy... is that what I looked like?'

His blue eyes were wide with shock and terror, glossed over with unshed tears. The Abyss was slowly beginning to dim the light in those eyes of his, but hadn't gotten very far yet—they still shone with an innocence they hadn't seen in quite a while, an innocence that didn't belong in a place such as the Abyss. His shaking hands clasped weakly at his foot; that's when they noticed that it was broken.

Some kind of forgotten instinct suddenly sparked again in their chest at the sight of his wounded ankle. Life... it was a thing they were supposed to protect. That was something they had been taught for as long as they could recall. It was only after falling into the Abyss that they began to stray from those teachings.

They needed to protect him. He was so fragile, the poor thing.

Briefly, they wondered what Baizhu, Jiangli, and their Master were doing right about now. Were they worried? They had no way of knowing. They did their best to brush those thoughts off before the homesickness could set in.

"You're hurt..." they observed, breaking the uneasy silence. "Broke it when you fell, huh? Can you walk, or will I have to carry you?"

"H— huh? Um..."

"Right. Got it. Hurry up and get on my back," they instructed, kneeling down with their back facing him so he could climb on with ease.

"How—" he gasped, withdrawing from them. "How can I trust you?"

"You'll die if you don't," they stated plainly, glaring back at him. Their gaze sent chills up his spine. It was so... empty. He was sure that not even the most seasoned warrior in his home nation looked so blank. It seemed as if all the light had been sucked from their soul, leaving a hardened shell of what they once were. Even Fatui officials had some kind of light in their face, but they simply did not. It unsettled him. "Get on. Now. You wouldn't last a day out here."

Though hesitant and utterly terrified, he yielded, reaching up to wrap his arms securely around their neck. They hooked their arms under his thighs and hoisted him up. Then, with a huff, they stood up.

The silence weighed a little too heavy for the boy's liking. Once the initial terror had worn off, he felt something much warmer bloom in his chest—awe. Absolute, unfettered awe.

Surely someone as tough as them could help him become more courageous.

"What's your name?"

"What, you trying to make conversation? Build rapport? I'm not planning on killing you. Relax," they scoffed. Then, after a brief, awkward silence, they went on, "...It's [Name]."

"I'm Ajax," he greeted with surprising grit for someone who just fell into the Abyss. "Hey, you're brave, right?"

"I... I guess?"

They dared to peek back at him. His eyes shone with light and determination foreign to anything or anyone in the Abyss. It did not belong here. He did not belong here.

"Teach me how to be brave like that."

Little did he know that light would disappear soon enough. They simply chose to look away, rather than mourn the loss that was inevitably going to occur.

"...You'll want to meet my teacher, then. She'll toughen you up."

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

"What is that?"

Ajax squeaked slightly, to which their lips twitched upwards into the ghost of a vaguely amused smile. Skirk must have unsettled him even more than they did.

"A boy."

Skirk's cold eyes narrowed at them. "No shit, [Name]."

"He fell and broke his ankle, so I brought him here," they elaborated, kneeling down again so he could easily get off their back without hurting himself even more. He gingerly slid off of them. Once he was off, they stood back up, walking over to her. "Anyway, I see why you wanted to rip my head off when you met me. You're totally right. He looked fucking pathetic."

"Oh, you get it now, hm?" She smirked, placing a firm hand on their shoulder. "Never thought I'd see the day you called someone pathetic."

They shrugged. "This place changes you, but I suppose I don't have to tell you of all people that." Then, they beckoned her to lean down slightly. When she obliged them, they whispered something inaudible into her ear, occasionally glancing over at Ajax. They eventually withdrew, turning to face him.

"If it's courage you seek," Skirk said, scrutinizing the boy; he seemed to shrink under her gaze, "you'll indeed find it down here."

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

Ajax’s time in the Abyss was short. They had briefly wondered if they would ever one day run into him on the surface when they did eventually get out. The thought was oddly nice.

He changed very fast, they recalled. What was once a timid and easily frightened boy had become a hardened weapon of war that sought out bloodshed just for the thrill of it. It fascinated them, really. Why weren’t they like that? They were but a fraction of the beast that he had become. The sensation of being alive certainly gave them a rush, but they hardly reveled in it the way he did.

Then again, maybe that’s why they could at least hold their own against Skirk.

That was something he could never truly manage to achieve. Once in a blue moon, the Snezhnayan boy could hold his own against them, but never Skirk. She was on a different level entirely. Now that they really thought about it, however, it seemed very likely that it was because he just wasn’t level-headed in the way they were.

That brought another question to mind, however: why wasn’t he level-headed like them? Why did he relish in the bloodshed more than they did?

The only possible explanation was their origins. Being from Chenyu Vale, it was hardly any surprise that one particular ideology was stamped irremovably into their brain.

Even so…

It would be unrealistic to expect that they wouldn’t change during their stay in the Abyss. Their exposure to Abyssal energy was insanely long—the fact that they still cared at all about saving lives was shocking.

Fourteen months into their time in the Abyss, something in their mind snapped.

They could recall nothing about their episode. All they remembered was that Skirk had them training, as usual, against hordes of Abyssal monsters. It wasn’t something all too challenging for them; they were quite used to her highly demanding training sessions. Just when they started getting slightly overwhelmed, an unfamiliar rage boiled in their chest, and they blacked out.

When they came to, all they could see was death.

Blood soaked their clothes and fingertips. They were quick to come to the horrifying realization that it was not theirs. None of the blood was theirs. Not a single drop was theirs. The shallow scratch on their cheek wasn't even deep enough to bleed. They dared not turn around. Their gaze remained locked into the darkness ahead of them, hands trembling and eyes watering.

Before they could say or do anything, before Skirk could say or do anything, the Abyss spit them out. It simply... decided it was done. As if it had grown bored, or as if it were finally satisfied with the level of corruption in their mind and soul. They lost consciousness briefly, only to awaken exactly where they had gone missing over a year ago.

…

Well, over two weeks ago, they guessed. Time dilation was a difficult thing to get used to.

“Bright… Archons above…” they groaned, pressing their hands over their eyes in an attempt to gradually adjust to the sheer brightness of the surface. It made them a little sick, if they were to be quite honest; they had grown used to the pitch blackness of the other realm. “Gods, it’s bright…”

“…[Name]?”

They peeked through their fingers, squinting in the hopes of being able to make out the figure standing a few feet from them. When it finally hit them just who it was, their heart throbbed. The soft green hair they had grown so accustomed to braiding throughout their childhood, now wild and untamed as a terrible consequence of stress and panic, the tender eyes filled with perhaps a little too much wisdom for a child that age…

They were really back on the surface. It wasn’t just some sick trick of the mind, no.

They were home.

“Bai— Baizhu?”

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

He was quick to call for help, leading them back to their shared Master. Jiangli seemed to almost cry when she saw them again—tears of relief or tears of worry, they didn't know. She reminded them of a concerned mother.

However, something they dreaded terribly had come to pass.

Their Master discovered that they were in no need of his healing. They were uninjured. All that blood was not theirs. It was never theirs. They were completely unharmed.

"There isn't a single scratch on you."

They intentionally avoided his gaze, instead focusing on their hands rested in their lap. Absentmindedly, they noted how calloused and scarred their hands were compared to how soft they had once been. The hands of a healer had become something far more sinister. Changsheng was eerily quiet.

"...[Name]?"

"No"—they sniffled, finally meeting their Master’s golden irises filled with tender concern, concern they did not deserve after what they had done—"there isn't."

The conversation died right then and there.

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

Their departure from Chenyu Vale was sudden and unexpected. Many did not know why they left. All they left behind that could explain why they left was a small envelope for Baizhu, but they honestly didn't know if he would even open it. Leaving him without a single word... it made them want to cry every time they thought about it.

The goodbyes they said to Jiangli and their Master were tearful, but neither of the two could stop them from leaving after learning that they had suffered so much. After all, what place did a killer have in Chenyu Vale?

‘You’re not a killer,’ Jiangli had insisted. ‘You’re not. You belong here, with us.’

They disagreed with her sentiment. How could she still look at them with such kindness, even after knowing what awful things they had done? Maybe that’s why they left without speaking to Baizhu. Maybe they knew he would have pleaded with them to stay. Maybe they knew they would have stayed if it were he who asked.

Many of their years were spent wandering Teyvat, but every now and then...

They'd settle in Snezhnaya to catch up with an old acquaintance of theirs after tracking down his whereabouts.

"The Fatui, hm? Looks like you really aren't some scared little kid anymore. Shame. You were quite a cute scared little kid."

They hopped from nation to nation on a whim, picking up knowledge and still studying medicine on the side, though they wouldn't dare call themselves a doctor of any kind. It was Liyue that they often avoided, and if they really couldn't help it, they'd sneak along the border like some kind of internationally wanted criminal. The idea of running into Baizhu would always send their stomach into knots. What would they even say to him? He owed them nothing. He owed them no kind of forgiveness.

'And yet, despite all that...' they mused, staring vacantly at the sleeping Jiangli at their side, 'here I am. I won't let anything hurt you, even if it means putting myself at risk.'

Their fingers gently ran through her tangled locks.

The constant pulsating glow of their Cryo vision was indication enough that, through their own means, they were keeping those terrible god remains at bay. Between the gorgeous icy energy that generated from them, a magenta glow was woven in like some kind of skilled artist's tapestry. It was as beautiful as it was unsettling.

The Abyss would always be a part of them. They might as well put Skirk's teachings to use.

"Why do you do such insane things?" they wondered aloud, head tilting back to shift their empty gaze towards the roof of the cavern. "You know that if I destroy those remains, your husband will die, and yet... I followed you nonetheless, knowing I would be at an impasse until someone came to rescue us, knowing I would inevitably cross paths with the one I have fought so hard to avoid. Why are you like this? So irresponsible, but then again... I am no better. I wouldn't be here if I was."

"Jiangli!"

"Well... it doesn't matter now," they murmured quietly, gently shaking her shoulder. "Jiangli, wake up. Baizhu and your husband are here. Some others too… I don’t know them though."

"We found her!... but who's that beside her?"

Baizhu was oddly silent, watching how they treated her with such tenderness, helping her sit up when she groggily rubbed the sleep from her eyes. Jialiang did not so much as flinch, however—he rushed up to them.

"[Name]! How is she?! Is she okay?!"

"Gods, Jialiang—" they hissed, pinching his arm in a soft attempt at scolding him. They vaguely resembled a parent chiding their child, despite the fact that he was older than them. "Don't run like that. You'll keel over dead if you keep that up. She's fine. She was just sleeping, I promise. I ensured her safety."

"Your ability to stave off the effects of the god remains is rather impressive, [Name]."

"...It's really not, Baizhu," they opposed quietly, rising to their feet. They dared not meet his eyes, looking anywhere but at him—they would feel an overwhelming sense of guilt if they were to see the evidence of his and Changsheng's contract, the contract that was always meant to be theirs. On top of that… they were certain he could see right through them, see the way they huffed out their breaths in a labored attempt at getting enough oxygen. "Don't try to make conversation. I'm not planning on running away this time. Jiangli probably did this on purpose... she forced my hand. It— look, it doesn’t matter. We'll talk about this, about everything, later."

He seemed content with that answer—for the time being, at least.

"Well, that's a first," Changsheng hissed from around the doctor's neck, "now isn't it?"

"You're getting sassy in your old age, Changsheng," they commented. "Haven't changed a single bit since the last time I saw you, hmm? Sassy old lady~"

"Hey!"

"Sorry, wait— Paimon's confused," the floating fairy interrupted. ‘Oh,’ they thought, ‘so that’s who Ajax was talking about.’ "Knowing Baizhu is one thing, but knowing Changsheng is waaaay different! Who are you?"

"My name is [Name]," they introduced with deceptive calmness that masked the pure, unadulterated panic they were experiencing on the inside. "You may have heard of me through a certain Fatui Harbinger. ‘Codename Childe, but I also go by Tartaglia,’ you know. The ginger with a bunch of cute siblings. Have you met them? They’re the cutest. Anyway, the harbinger has quite the collection of good things to say about you, traveler."

Aether tensed slightly, shooting Baizhu an odd look, almost as if to ask who he was associating with in his spare time.

"Relax. I'm not a part of the Fatui," they dismissed with a wave of their hand. "Those people are a bit insane, if you ask me, supporting a deity who hardly seems to care for them or the general population of her nation... Erm. Anyway. I only happen to know Ajax because we were both victims of the same circumstance a while back."

"What..." Aether trailed off, blinking. Something in the way he looked at them, looked at the blankness in their eyes, said that he already understood. "...What does that mean?"

"Ask him yourself. Do me a favor, though, and tell me what he says. I'm genuinely curious."

"Hey!" Paimon cut in with an annoyed huff, stomping her foot like an aggravated toddler. The thought made them smile slightly. "Stop ignoring Paimon! You still didn't answer her question!"

"[Name] was another one of my Master's disciples, like Jiangli," Baizhu explained on their behalf, briefly glancing in their direction. "Although... I haven't seen them in several years. Like Jiangli, they too ran away."

"Oh, Gods, Baizhu," they groaned, turning to face him properly for the first time in years. Their breath almost dared to hitch at the golden irises that stared back at them. "Don't be dramatic. Are you telling people I ran away? I didn't run away. I told our Master why I was leaving and when I planned on doing so. It's Jiangli who really didn't tell anyone why she left. I wasn't that secretive about why I left, you know."

"Nuance."

They then softened up slightly, running their hand through their hair. A deep sigh left through their nose. "...You really haven't changed at all."

He seemed to smile a bit at their exasperation. It was only fair, they supposed. They had left him in the dark for years. He deserved to find some amusement in the uncomfortable situation they were both forced into.

"Well... whatever. We have bigger issues than my past friendships right now," they said, crossing their arms over their chest. "What are we doing about these remains? I have protected Jiangli's body and mind, but only to an extent. She is infected and it will continue to worsen if we do nothing. However, if we destroy these remains..."

"Indeed..." Baizhu murmured, turning to the man in question. "If we destroy these remains, your life will come to an end."

"If you knew what she was doing," Aether cut in, "why didn't you stop her?"

"You cannot stop a woman like that once she has her heart set on something. All I could do was watch from the background until she put herself in too much danger, to the point where I'd have to defend her," they sighed, "such as what she did here."

Jialiang looked between them and Baizhu. "...I had wondered when this day might come."

Jiangli was silent.

"We've been working our butts off to save Jialiang's life!" Paimon shouted. "We can't just give up on him now! Baizhu, you're a great doctor. Surely you've gotta know of some other way we can save him, right? Or— [Name]! If you studied with Baizhu, you should know a few things too, right?"

"Sure. I still remember some things from that time," they replied, tilting their head back a bit so they could gaze at Jiangli's husband. "Jialiang could continue taking the poison. Jiangli is... in decent condition overall, so it wouldn't be the end of the world to delay the destruction of the remains, but she will fall more ill as time goes on. Either way, someone will die if we don't do something."

"[Name], you've been watching Jiangli," Jialiang stated, standing up to meet their eyes. "How long does she have?"

"If she completely stopped coming here..." they mused thoughtfully, "a few weeks at most would be my guess. You'd probably get a more precise answer from Baizhu, though."

"I would say that is accurate," Baizhu agreed, nodding. "I could... extend that time, however, if I were to treat her using a secret art."

"You..." They wanted to scold him, chide him for even suggesting such a thing, but in the end, they did not. It would make them a hypocrite. They simply bit their tongue. Jiangli watched closely with a gentle gaze comparable to that of an aunt or a mother as the various emotions flickered across their expression.

"...But what would be the point of that?" Jialiang lamented. "Dr. Baizhu, I am all too aware of the dangers of god remains. You are not the first to mention it to me. [Name] often warned me, but... I did not listen. If I continue to sustain my own life using this wretched substance, then not only would Jiangli have to keep risking her life to make my medicine for me, but I would have to live with the looming threat of these remains breaking out and wreaking havoc not just upon me, but my entire family. I know for a fact that I should have died over a decade ago. The fact that I've been around to see Ayu grow up is already a great blessing from Rex Lapis. If my choice can keep Jiangli alive, then... even if I die..."

"Jialiang..." Paimon trailed off.

The man chuckled sadly. "After cheating death for so long, it seems I've grown somewhat addicted to life."

"Life is a terrible drug for those of us who often come face-to-face with death," they admitted, placing a hand on his shoulder. "Take a minute to talk with Jiangli. We'll wait."

"Thank you..." he said, kneeling down at his tired wife's side, "I'm sorry that I won't be able to repay your kindness in this life."

"Jialiang...” Paimon cried, wiping her face with her little balled up hands. “Baizhu, Changsheng, [Name], is there really nothing else any of you can do?"

"Cheating death is beyond my ability," they answered apologetically. "I know much of arts that are... beyond this world, but they are not used for preserving nor extending life. I wish I could do more, but I can’t. My apologies."

"I am sure that over the years, Jiangli will have tried all the conventional methods known to humankind. As for the less conventional methods, I have little expertise besides Changsheng's secret art..."

Aether's gaze flickered between them and Baizhu as he said that, before settling back on the Liyuean doctor. "...They're aware of it?"

"Try to avoid treating me like an outsider," they half-scolded. "Believe it or not, I was meant to be bound to Changsheng. Fate had different plans, however, so yes. I am very much aware. Even through the medium, that being Changsheng, none of Baizhu's predecessors could manage to cheat death."

"Mortals are fated to grow old and pass on when their natural lifespan runs out," the snake mused. "If it were so easy to combat the natural processes of aging and death, Jiangli would not have had to resort to unnatural methods."

Paimon sniffled. "What a crazy situation... Jiangli risked it all to save Jialiang's life, and now, Jialiang has to sacrifice himself to save Jiangli. What's the point of it all..?"

"Love, I have heard, tends to make people do insane things," they stated. "It's quite tragic, really."

The traveler nodded. "All we can do now is honor Jialiang's decision and bear witness."

"...I've seen many final farewells in my time," Baizhu commented softly, quietly, "but I can never get used to it."

"In the human realm, all things must come to an end. Is it not a fitting end to die for a worthy cause? At least... that's what generations of Masters before you always believed."

They wondered if Changsheng was somehow trying to be reassuring.

"The path they chose was indeed a heroic one," Baizhu agreed, "but when I think of those who would willingly sacrifice themselves for others... I cannot help but think that theirs are the lives least deserving of death."

The quiet whispers shared between the couple gradually died down. It was then that Jialiang stood up.

"I've said my goodbyes. My time has come. Do what you must."

"As you wish."

"We have not been in contact for years," they spoke up, stepping forward and raising their hand, "but I know you well enough to know that a man dying indirectly by your own hand will weigh on your mind. I will take care of this. Stand down, Baizhu."

The doctor seemed momentarily stunned, but he nodded nonetheless, backing off. "...Very well, [Name]."

With a chilling wind and a flick of their wrist, the god remains dissipated with a hiss.

It wasn't very long until Jialiang collapsed.

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

"Jialiang..! Jialiang!"

The man shot up with a gasp, instinctively clutching at his chest.

"Dad! Are you awake?!"

"Jiangli..? Ayu? Didn't I..." Jialiang trailed off, gaze drifting to the seals stuck on his skin. "Huh? What are these?"

Changsheng’s voice drew his attention. "How does it feel to come back to life?"

"Do you feel strange or different in any way?" Baizhu questioned, walking to his bediside. "If so, could you describe it to me in detail?"

"Dr. Baizhu! I thought I was going to..."

"Die? You did, actually," they stated, gently holding his arm, carefully inspecting the sigils as to not disrupt the delicate imitation of immortality that the doctor had created. "To think this is what Baizhu's been doing in my absence... absolutely fascinating. Sorry, Jialiang, do you mind? I'll back off if it's uncomfortable. Don’t be afraid to tell me.”

Jiangli giggled at her husband's look of sheer confusion.

"Uh... no, you're— you're okay..? Go ahead."

Baizhu's lips quirked up at the sight of their enthusiasm. He said nothing of it, though. "As things stand now, you're more akin to a zombie than a human."

"...I'm a zombie?!"

"That's right. Before we set off, I asked Qiqi to prepare and Elixir of Immortality. With its help, you have been suspended in the space between life and death. Of course, this is but a crude imitation of an adeptus art. I don't expect it to extend your life indefinitely. Whether it will keep you alive for a few days, a few months, or a few years...” Baizhu mused, “I am as interested as you to find out, but however long you have left, I believe it should be more than sufficient time for you to say your final goodbyes before departing the world in peace. ...I hope Director Hu finds this arrangement to be a satisfactory one?"

"An Elixir of Immortality? How'd you cook that up? Ugh," the girl in question groaned, "leave it to you to work on something like that behind my back..."

"It's a work in progress that hardly lives up to its name, and it would've had no effect if not for Jialiang's iron will." Baizhu shifted, crossing his arms over his chest. "In the end, I am merely a doctor. I understand very little about the great principles governing life and death, and the perpetual cycle of yin and yang. All I know is that if I am presented with a life that deserves to be saved, I will do everything within my power to save it. Even this would have counted for nothing if not for Director Hu's assistance... after all, did you not tell Jialiang to show us the way before we set off for Qingce Village?"

"Oops! Aaaand, I'm busted..."

"Without Director Hu nudging things in the right direction, we may not have found Jiangli and [Name] in time. They could only hold those remains off for so long."

"It wouldn't have meant anything if not for your friend over there," she pointed out. "They nudged me first."

"I did," they conceded, finally backing away from Jialiang after finishing their investigation of his sigils. "What of it? I was worried about Jialiang and Jiangli. I told Director Hu who I was and where I was headed after eavesdropping, and then she nudged Jialiang in that direction. It's not that serious."

"Eavesdropping is kind of serious!" Paimon exclaimed, shooting them an odd look.

"Fair point, but it's not like I was eavesdropping on someone I've never met. What could Baizhu have said to you that I wouldn't have already known? Absolutely nothing.”

"I knew there were people listening in on our conversation back then," Aether murmured. "To think it was you two..."

"No wonder he didn't mention the Elixir back then," Director Hu muttered to herself. "I thought he was being frank and transparent with me for once, but apparently not."

Jialiang cleared his throat, laughing a bit. "Director Hu told me to keep her suggestion a secret, and [Name] had told Jiangli and I a while ago to keep it a secret that they were in Liyue, but it seems nothing escapes Dr. Baizhu's attention..."

"Never underestimate a serpent's sense of smell!" Changsheng hissed, almost seeming to be proud.

"All I wanted was to help Jialiang find his missing wife as soon as possible, so that he could be on his way to the afterlife without any unfulfilled wishes making the journey more difficult than it needs to be..." Hu Tao sighed. "Leave it to Bubu Pharmacy to snatch the perfect opportunity right outta my hands at the last hurdle! Never mind, I'll just have to put it down in the books as a deferred consideration... one Qiqi was enough of a conundrum; the last thing I need's another one. If I'd known this was coming, I would have whisked him off to the Wangsheng Funeral Parlor the moment I found him."

"Y— you stay away from my dad! When I grow up, I'm gonna become a better doctor than Mom and Baizhu, and cure Dad for good!" Ayu declared, making them chuckle into their hand. They ruffled his brown hair fondly. "A— and [Name]! Better than [Name] too!"

"I don't really practice medicine anymore, honey. I definitely don't count as a doctor. You'd outdo me within a week."

Jiangli grinned at them, teasing, "I don't know, [Name]. For someone who 'doesn't practice medicine anymore,' you still act as if you do. You seem very fascinated with Baizhu's imitation of immortality on a very deep level.”

"Old habits die hard," they simply answered. "What can I say?”

"Oh? Is that so?" Hu Tao chimed, turning to Ayu. "Well, you wouldn't be the first person who's tried to put Wangsheng Funeral Parlor out of business. If you're serious about it, you'll have your work cut out for you."

Just like that, she turned on her heel and left.

"Phew... is she finally gone?" Qiqi peeked out from her hiding spot. Upon seeing them, and noting that Hu Tao was gone, she ran over to them, presenting them with a silk flower. "I meant to give it to you earlier... because it's pretty, like you... but I forgot..."

Their face turned serious as they faced the Liyuean doctor. "Baizhu."

"Hm?"

"I'm keeping her. She's mine now. This is my child now."

Both Baizhu and Jiangli chuckled at how purely enamored they were with her, kneeling down so Qiqi could tuck the flower behind their ear. They cooed over her sweetness, patting her head lovingly. Ayu almost seemed a little jealous of the attention they showered her in.

"All's well that ends well!" Paimon chimed, turning to Aether. "If you ask Paimon, we should probably go do something to celebrate this heard-earned family reunion..."

"Paimon's idea of a celebration can only mean one thing..."

"Hehe! At times like this, a grand celebratory feast is in order!"

Jialiang chuckled, "It feels like it was a whole lifetime ago when I last talked with Jiangli and Ayu around the dinner table."

"Rightfully so," they said, "you've been through a lot."

Aether nodded. "This was a hard-earned meal."

"Yaaay~! Paimon can't wait! Alright, first thing's first—off to the market for some fresh ingredients! Let's go~!"

"Wait up!" Ayu shouted, running after them. "I'll come too!"

"Baizhu, thank you so, so much for everything you've done for us..." Jiangli thanked, then turning to place a hand on their shoulder as many had done before her. "And [Name], I would not be as well as I am now if not for you. You've been standoffish for the past decade, but I know you still care. For all of us."

"Ah... I wasn't trying to come off as cold. Things just got tough for me after that incident. I never want you guys to feel like I don't care, you know..."

"Don't mention it, Jiangli," Baizhu reassured. "I was just doing my duty."

"Just your duty, huh..." she mused wistfully. "Baizhu, Changsheng, [Name], would you mind if we took this conversation outside?"

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

"Time flies. It's been so long since we've been together like this... Changsheng, you're the same as ever," Jiangli laughed. "You haven't changed one bit!"

"That's literally what I said to her, too," they exclaimed. "See, I knew I was right! Some things just don't change, hm?"

"...You two, on the other hand, have changed a lot," Changsheng replied, a thoughtful lilt to her tone. She certainly knew more than what she was letting on.

"You're right," Jiangli admitted. "My younger self would have never imagined that things would one day turn out this way."

"I doubt that any of us imagined our lives would turn out this way," they added. "I mean, really... our time in Chenyu Vale seems so far gone now, doesn’t it?”

“It really does,” the woman agreed.

The evening light bathed their face in yellow-orange light; it wasn't quite late enough yet for the light to take on a more golden hue, but it was beautiful nonetheless. Even after all the horrors they had witnessed, they still had the capacity to recognize beauty.

"Liyue's so pretty at this time, isn't it?" they wondered aloud.

"You always did think so," Baizhu replied. "That much hasn't changed."

An oddly comfortable silence settled for but a few short moments as the small group descended the last of the stairs that led to Bubu Pharmacy. Jiangli was the first to break it:

“I’ve taken a look at your Elixir of Immortality, Baizhu, as has [Name]. It isn’t altogether dissimilar from the poison I concocted in terms of the way it functions.”

“I have to say, Jiangli, it was a stroke of genius to use poison to maintain life. I hope you’re not too upset at me for… copying your methods?”

“No, not at all. With your intellect, even if you’d never seen my poison, I believe you would have eventually arrived at the same approach, but I’m still impressed by how quickly you gained such a thorough understanding of it. Jialiang’s still only been in your care for a few days. Not just that—you even managed to improve upon the original formula. That cannot be explained by intellect alone…”

“Ten mora says he tried it out on himself.”

“Ha!” Changsheng laughed. “Told you the truth would come out sooner or later.”

“Knew it,” they hummed. “Life force has never been the only thing Changsheng’s contract allows her contractees to transfer. I know simply because I used to catch our master doing things like that all the time.”

“Baizhu…” Jiangli trailed off.

“…Nothing gets past you two. Yes, Changsheng’s secret art also allows for the transfer of toxins and diseases. When I treated Jialiang for the second time, I transferred some of the poison from his body onto my own. Not only did this allow me to alleviate the burden on him, but it also gave me an opportunity to study its properties. There is no need to worry about any long-term consequences to my health, however. Now that the source has been destroyed, any remaining poison in me will have already dissipated.”

“But you took such a huge risk,” Jiangli opposed. “If we hadn’t destroyed the gods’ remains back there, then even you might have…” She then sighed. “What am I saying? I’m in no position to criticize you for this, and if [Name] knew… it’s no wonder why they were adamant on destroying the remains themselves.”

They nodded. “I had to be sure they would be gone. Believe me, whatever was there before… it is not there now and will never be there again.”

“Leave it to you to see through us all, even from such a distance,” she said with a fond, wistful smile. She turned back to Baizhu. “The reason I left our Master and went into hiding all those years ago was that he was getting old, and I didn’t want him using up any more of his own life force to treat my husband, but in the end… how were my methods any different than his? I risked one life to save another, and then you tried the poison on yourself, too… It looks like both of us have ended up going the same way as out master before us. As for [Name]… heh, they’re hardly any better.”

Baizhu seemed intrigued by her statement. “How so?”

“[Name], why don’t you tell Baizhu how you absorbed the majority of that gods’ remains to keep them from getting to me?”

“It’s different,” they insisted, gaze shifting towards the golden sky. "I mean, I did do that, yes—that’s not what I’m denying. You two do it because if there is a life in front of you deserving of being saved, you save it, and… ten years ago, I would have done it solely for the same reasons. Now, though… It’s different. That incident changed me, Jiangli. I do it because I get a rush from surviving things like that.”

“Nonetheless, your intentions towards others are still good,” Jiangli said, gently squeezing their upper arm. “Would you have done it if you didn’t care? If you weren’t scared for my life? You said it yourself. You were worried about my husband and I. You put yourself in a situation you knew would inevitably lead to you and Baizhu meeting again. You put yourself at risk, and that is what really makes me wonder: are all disciples of Chenyu Vale destined to turn out this way? To live a short life, having given away our own for the sake of others? To fight relentlessly against the natural course of life and death, whatever the cost? …Maybe our fate is sealed the moment we decide to study medicine.”

“We are doctors, Jiangli. We ought never say that anyone’s fate is sealed.”

“Baizhu, I can tell that over the years, you’ve used the contract with Changsheng to transfer many diseases and toxins onto yourself. There are so many, that some of them I don’t even recognize… can you still stop it before it’s too late?”

“Don’t fool yourself. We all know the answer to that question, Jiangli,” they interrupted, “and we all know it’s a very honest no. All disciples of Chneyu Vale believe in the same core principle. Don’t be a hypocrite.”

“Heey~!” Paimon shouted, waving the group over. “Food’s ready!”

“Mom!” Ayu exclaimed excitedly, running up to the woman. “Come and join us! Aether taught me a load of new recipes and said even Dad’ll be able to taste them! Come and try them out!”

“Yes, darling, mom’ll be there in just a minute… Hey, slow down!” she exclaimed, chasing after her child. She stopped briefly, turning back to face them and Baizhu. “Baizhu, I know I won’t be able to convince you, but… please don’t forget that, if one day, you’re not around anymore… Qiqi, Gui, and all the friends that have grown fond of you, they will all miss you dearly.”

“There’s no need to worry, Jiangli. I know what I’m doing.”

“…I can only hope so,” she sighed, “and [Name]? I believe you know where this conversation needs to go. I was honest about why I left. It’s your turn now.”

She walked off after her son.

A silence settled in her absence. This time, however, it was tense.

Then, Baizhu seemed to search his pockets for something. His face brightened slightly when he found it: a small envelope yellowed with age. He handed it over to them.

"You... never opened it?" they wondered softly, holding the letter they'd written all those years ago with such delicacy that they weren't even aware they were capable of anymore.

"I wanted to hear the explanation from you."

"This was from me," they tried to counter.

"[Name]."

"Yeah, yeah... I get it. You wanted to hear it from me directly. I know," they sighed, leaning back against the railing, fidgeting with the paper envelope help in their hands. "It really isn't a pretty story, but if anyone deserves to know... I suppose it's you. I’m surprised Changsheng didn’t tell you already, given how inclined she is to gossiping—”

“Hey!”

“—Just... please. Do me a favor and try not to look at me too differently after you hear it."

Baizhu reached out to their shoulder, giving it a tender squeeze. "I just want to know why you left so abruptly. We were so close. There is nothing you could say or do that would make me resent you."

They smiled bitterly. "We'll see about that."

— flower of the universe !! 🌸

For the first time in a very long time, they spoke to Baizhu.

Not superficially, not as distant professionals, but as friends. It was a moment of honest vulnerability that truly frightened them. They hadn't been that vulnerable since before their fall.

The silence weighed heavily on their chest as they gazed anywhere but at their former friend. Somehow, the anticipation for his response was far more suffocating than any other in the past—even the anticipation for their Master's response was never this heavy.

Then, the Liyuean doctor reached out, gingerly tugging them towards his figure. His arms settled comfortably around their waist.

The weak beating of his heart and the wheezing breaths he took prompted them to sob. The sound they let out was overwhelmingly heartbreaking; it was somehow even worse than the cry they had let out upon taking that first life all those years ago in the Abyss. All the pain they suppressed for all the years they hid from their home, their friends... it all came flooding out at once.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry..."

"You went through all of that," Baizhu whispered, his voice meant only for them (and Changsheng by default…) to hear as a hand ran soothingly through their hair, "and you truly believed we would hold that against you?"

"Yes!" they wept. Archons... they hadn't felt this pathetic since their initial descent into the Abyss. "Gods, Baizhu, of course I thought you all would hold it against me! I was supposed to be Changsheng's next contractee! It was never supposed to be you! I didn't want it to be you!"

"I know."

"It's not fair! You— you're here giving away your life force, and you're going to die young, and it's going to be my fault! I should have done something differently! Maybe then we wouldn't be in this situation!"

"It's not your fault."

"It is!"

"It's not."

"You're suffering because of me!"

"[Name]."

"I only ever do bad things to you," they sobbed. "Why do you still want to forgive me? Why are you wasting your time comforting me? You should just move on. You're better off without me."

"Stay in Liyue."

"H— huh?" they sniffled. "What? No, I... No!”

“Stay, [Name]. Please.”

“No! Why do you even want me to stay here?! You should hate me! You should—”

“You’re reckless with your own life. Do you really think I don’t see it? You claim to get a rush from being alive, but… I do not believe that is the only thing you seek out by putting yourself at risk. Mentally well people don’t behave this way. Let me help you. Please."

‘No shit,’ they wanted to say, ‘I haven’t been well since that day.’

“Are you saying you don’t trust me to be on my own?”

“I am.”

Their throat closed. They squeezed their eyes shut.

He was right, much as they hated it.

“…Fucking hypocrite.”

"That may be so.” He smiled ruefully. “If that isn’t good enough of a reason, then… I’m asking you to stay because I want you to stay, [Name]. Stay with me for a little while." His eyes were filled with a gentleness that they wholeheartedly believed should not have been directed at them. "We still get along, don't we? Though you may have changed, I genuinely find it hard to believe anything about us has changed, so stay. Let's get to know each other again, hm?"

They blinked. Once, twice. Tears pricked at their eyelashes.

"...Okay."

They still failed to part from Baizhu, but he didn't seem to mind, only resuming his motions of brushing his fingers through their hair.

"Qiqi quite likes your company, too."

"Yes..." they murmured. "Um, a lot of kids seem to, you know... Ayu, my other friend's siblings... I don't really get it, but they, um, they all seem to like me."

For what was the first time in decades, they felt truly at peace. They'd often engage in meaningless conversation under the sunset's light with Baizhu in their youth, gathering herbs and the like for their shared Master. To do something so similar once again...

It soothed the beast their soul had become.

The sunset's light, however, did not dance in their eyes as it once had.

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot! taglist: @zeldadou, @ophelium-flowers, @aikitsuki.

#aphelion writes 🌸#favoniuslibrary #astronetwrk #genshin impact x reader #genshin platonic #genshin x reader #platonic genshin #platonic genshin impact #platonic genshin impact x reader #platonic genshin x reader #platonic baizhu x reader #baizhu x reader

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outerexpanse · 1 year

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downpour headcanons + designs :)

Thoughts on each under the cut, some contain direct spoilers. (Lots of writing)

Note for pronouns listed: These are just my HCs, use whatever you prefer or see fit. :)

Gourmand: She/He/They Full of love and oh so happy with life. Simply went out into the world for FUN and to learn more, why not? Respected and highly regarded at the Home Tree as one of the smartest slugcats around. Coming up with ways to make meals more filling is always important with so many slugcats! Gourmand returns with many regions mapped out, and thus gives way to more slugcats to explore as groups and create homes for themselves. Teaches about the taming of lizards, and to take care when doing so. What was an incredible enemy can make a greater ally. All around a very positive, happy-go-lucky slug to me.

Artificer: She/Her I wanted her to design to be .. fire-esque with the markings like flames in a way. Obviously very troubled, so incredibly lonely because of it as well. She's afraid of connections, what if the past repeats? It would hurt too much. That SAID.. she will find her way to Outer Expanse and be welcomed with open arms. Prior, I think she was apart of a small nomadic family of slugcats so the Home Tree is something else entirely new. Arti could, in this scenario, take on the role of a community mother in a way. There's still fear of the past coming back in new ways, but in this she begins to open up more and becomes adoptive mother to slugpups whose parents have been lost in some form. I just think!! She deserves the world!!! She gets to relax. No more Situations.

Rivulet: She/He/They Somewhat based on how some aquatic animals have a whiter tummy to blend in to creatures below them in the water, and a darker upper body to camouflage to those looking down in the water. (A bit difficult with all the pink, I wanted to keep that on her though..) Very kind :) she loves to bring gifts to Moon, and periodically pays visits to 5P for as long as he still lives. I like to think they also lived with Moon until they passed themselves. Spent a ton of time listening to Moon reading the pearls he found out in the world, and exchanging stories (perhaps via writing..??) that they both have. Softanthiel still hangs around, primarily used as a way to gauge the danger of potential threats to the tree.

Spearmaster: It/They/He Definitely Looks like a slugcat but with something Wrong (on the wrong blueprints in a way). It is taller and longer than the average slugcat. Leaning more into the bodyshape it has in game (bowling pin looking ass) I’d say it has a harder time retaining fat through a liquid diet and constant movement as a messenger. Built quite sleek, I’d picture it with an agility somewhere between Artificer and Rivulet. Spearmaster has nasty little "spots" on his tail so why not give him little freckles too? SRS did not give SM a mouth, so, to me I think that he would be taught sign language. ASL (Ancient Sign Language) would no doubt be something stored and memorized on various pearls. Given its time around an Iterator it would also know how to read/write in the Ancient's language. I feel like they'd be quite a bit lonely.

Saint: They/He To me, they are a distant descendant of Monk. Their fur is very soft, almost like downy feathers in a way. Absolutely vital to their survival in the now frigid wasteland. Keen to grooming themself like a cat would! The echoes are old friends, a familiar warmth. Seeing them is like visiting family, of which Saint no longer has now. Definitely nomadic, never stays in a den for longer than three cycles. Lanterns are tucked into fur for ease of travelling with free hands. :) He's round and spotted because I love him so much!!

WHEW ok thats all. feel free to share your thoughts :)

note that i dont mind these designs being used or designs inspired by them but i would like my art to NOT be reposted.

#rain world #my post #my art #rain world downpour spoilers #rainworld downpour spoilers #downpour spoilers #rainworld dlc spoilers #rain world dlc spoilers #saint #gourmand #artificer #spearmaster #rivulet #slugcat #headcanon #some have more bc i have more thoughts #but i love them regardless if they have less #especially saint .. my fave :)

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fornasedensgudar · 7 months

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Have you forgotten her?

Do you know her name?

Who is she?

The goddess Ilmr.

(Pardon my bad english, not my first language)

Shes listed as a goddess and occurs in skaldic kennings in the 10th and 11th centuries, and were likely about to be forgotten and lost to all time.

Her name and mystery intreeged me and my fiance, so we did some witchy trans work and see what we could find and then compared, and we both came down to:

"Goddess of change, opens portals to helheim.

Protect the dead and give a safe passage.

Maker of scents to calm the dying. Half sister to Eir. Cold, alone and missunderstood.

Helps you re-think situations and see diffrent outlooks.

Half asir and half jötunn.

Perhaps listed as a disir and a valkyria."

(This is our UPG so take it as you may, its ok if you see her diffrent.)

But also, Not to far of I say so. If you look at some of the very little we have about her and some theories scholars have.

Like most goddesses her name hints to her role. But we are not sure what it means? Some say ilmr means "pleasant scent". This is strange for a goddess/valkyrie but another of her name some say could etymologically related to almr, meaning Elm tree. A tree that on iceland would then ben a rare and more and more rare thing to see along with most trees after the first settlments. Wich might be why she was forgotten, if she is the goddess of the Elm and the Elm becomes rare and travel to places where the elm grow and pepole know of her, then she becomes more and more unknown.

Another intresting thing about the Elm is that in folklore all over Europe its associated with death, something thats rather intresting when looking to a skald from 950s with the kenning "jalmr Ilmar" meaing "Ilmrs alarm". A nother hint to this is that Ilmr may be related to the noun jalmr (noise).

Also, in "Bjarnar saga Hítdælakappa" Bjarnar calls the disir that tells him about his comming death for "Ilmr armleggjar orma". Meaning sort of "ilmr of the armrings". Another thing hinting to her work in death.

So what do you say? Goddess of good scent? Or death? I say why not both? Of lovely scents and with incense we give thanks to spirits of the dead and their Guardian Who guides them to the next realm. With a lovely scent she calms the dead. She who screams in allarm on the battlefeald, goddeass of the Elm. She who helps those Eir could not.

Ilmr.

Here it up to us, the modern polytheistic community to remake as well make something new. Traditions and gods change and its we Who write the history as we work with and learn more about these gods. ((But remeber to make it clear whats UPG and whats based in old sources))

So what do you say?

Do you know the name Ilmr? And how do you see this forgotten goddess?

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irisjaxx665 · 1 month

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in the past couple years, ive been working on getting better with talking about my traumas. at this point the only people i havent talked to about everything are my parents. i dont cry as much now, talking about it though.

before colorado, my parents, their son brett, and i lived in Oklahoma. He, while biologically my full sibling, never acted like a brother towards me. from when i was age 11 til 13 He molested me and threatened my life many times. so i hadnt called Him a brother since i was 10. this, they know and the molestation stopped though the threats and insults didnt until we cut contact when i turned 18. but when i was 7, i met my first and, for years, only friend, who i fell in love with, and who became a better brother to me than i had ever known. i never brought him to my parents house, and this they dont know. His name was Nikolai, he was 11 then. i loved Him with all that i was or ever would be and He saw me as His little sister. so i swore to be the best little sister anyone could have. He loved mardi gras and wanted to go to new orleans when He got older. He taught me kickboxing and russian, i taught Him ballet and what limited german i knew. we talked about everything and nothing, and i felt like someone cared about me, instead of just caring for me. we swore oaths, bound in blood and fire and the passion of innocence. we swore to join the marines when i hit 18 so we could serve side by side. we swore to keep no secrets to each other. we swore that a pain to one would be a pain to both. we swore to name our firstborns for each other, and name the other godparent when we found our loves. we swore to get matching tattoos. we swore to fulfill bucket lists together. to see the world together. He taught me how to clean my wounds when i learned what hate was, aimed towards myself like a grenade with my name etched on its face in every language. He taught me how to protect myself against the animals that roamed our woods and climb trees and swim the rivers around us. He picked me up and cleaned me up after my suicide and overdose attempts in my tween years. He taught me the names of the stars and how to follow their dance. He told me every quote and phrase that has lodged itself in my head and in my veins and on my bones. He let me cry and be afraid and be myself without telling me that i had to be ashamed of who i was, or that i had to change.

on march 25, 2014 i found His body, after getting home from a spring break trip with my parents. since then, the only other real brother ive had has been Caine. everything gets very hard every year, around His death and His birthday in december. in april is when i was raped by the cop. that may is when i found i was pregnant, and got clean of heroin. january of 2015 is when i had and lost my twins. winter isnt kind to me. between my mental and physical health, its taxing.

this year, when Pond and i get home from our honeymoon, ill be 10 years clean almost to the day. the twins wouldve turned 9 this past january. and Nikolai would have turned 27. i still feel so weird knowing im older than my big brother. my one true fear is losing the people i love. and since i was young ive had memory issues. and as every year passes, i can feel im losing a piece of Him. i can barely remember His voice now. i remember His eyes. i remember the feeling of getting to be in His arms, in a hug, sleeping, sobbing, fighting. i remember His scent. He always smelt of the forest and the river and freedom and joy and safety. meeting Caine in colorado, i saw Niki in His heart. i saw Niki in His strength, His peace, His power, His voice, His arms. He taught me how to trust again and taught me not to be ashamed of my scars. because somehow the gods still havent taken me and thats why i wear them. and we talked about everything and nothing. then i met Pond, and in His eyes, i saw Niki again. Pond has Niki’s eyes. rich, deep, honest, loving, passionate, beautiful eyes. and He knows every inch of me. every scar, every freckle and hair of me. and somehow, He loves me. though i could never understand. and these men ive loved in my life mean worlds to me. i just wish i could give them the worlds they deserve. instead, all i can do is all that i can.

#me #personal rant

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i-hate-spitelout-jorgenson · 2 years

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Nonononono I would love to hear you get into why you despise the hidden world i am always ready to add more reasons to my list

This is gonna be super messy and infodumpy but you asked and I deliver. fueled by rage, 40°c/100°f weather and no aircon.

First of all, The Hidden World was NOT exactl up for success. The first two films had two people workin together: Chris Sanders and Dean DeBlois. in the first film they were both directors, in the second one was a director and one was an executive producer. The first two are regarded generally as some of Dreamworks' best work, only really tailing films like Shrek and Shrek 2. The Hidden World isn't. I cant say I know a lot about what Sanders and DeBlois individually contributed to the films, but I can say this with confidence: DeBlois does not understand the dragons on a fundamental level. Time and time again the dragons are shown to be intelligent, capable understanding human speech and sarcasm, being fully sentient and sapient just as we are. For whatever reason, DeBlois never seemed to get this. Thats why The Hidden World treats the dragons like wild animals with instincts and a call for the wild when theyre shown to not be like that at all. At some point during the film, Astrid says, "What did you expect? You gave him his freedom, Hiccup." (paraphrased). Thats bullshit. And thats not even headcanon, its just bullshit. The whole idea of dragons being called away by their instincts to start a family and move on was already done in Gift Of The Nightfury, and it did it better! Literally the entire point of that short was that the dragons CHOSE to come back. They didn't want freedom, they wanted companionship - which clearly they understand as deeply as we do. Toothless is a special case, because its debateable that he never had those instincts to begin with. To that I say: Why didn't he have them to begin with? What was different about this time? That he SAW the lightfury? Gift Of The Nightfury was made to explore the idea of dragons laying eggs as a part of their instincts. If laying eggs is part of the instinct, why did Toothless and the Lightfury only do that like fifteen-twenty years later? And I dont have an answer for that. DeBlois did not direct Gift Of The Nightfury, but he worked on it. He watched the project grow and go through all of its developmental stages and came out of it learning apparently nothing. How To Train Your Dragon and How To Train Your Dragon 2 (as well as its respective TV shows) recognised the dragons as a very expressive, very complex part of the universe that have friends, familial ties, personalities, morals, emotions, understanding of human language. They dont get this treatment in The Hidden World. In The Hidden World Toothless is reduced to a romanticised, horny house dog.

DeBlois also doesn't seem to fully grasp the bond that the dragons and riders have. Toothless specifically has repeatedly risked his life for Hiccup. Off the top of my head, he saved him from that avalanche and risked being buried alive or dying of hypothermia; he (several times) swims far too deep to attempt to rescue Hiccup; he dives into the Red Death's fire to save hiccup; he deters, oh I don't know, a BEWILDERBEAST in order to protect hiccup. He has never truly in his life chose something over Hiccup. And you're telling me the Lightfury shows up, SHOOTS AT HICCUP, and Toothless still risks it all for some pussy? Like seriously? That bitch would have been GONE within seconds.

Now, I can't find a source for this, so take it with a grain of salt, but just like how the original villain of the second film was Valka, apparently the original pitch for the third was that they find a cave full of Nightfuries. First of all this wouldve been so much more interesting. I cant speak for Race To The Edge, but the ENTIRETY of Riders of Berk, Defenders of Berk, and even How To Train Your Dragon 2 lead up to the idea that maybe Toothless wasn't the last of his kind. I couldnt tell you how many times its alluded to in the show alone. And you're telling me, after, what, seven years, your answer is just, "That guy killed them all"? Which brings me onto Grimmel.

The selling point of Grimmel is that he's smart. He's the most intelligent villain they've fought yet. Personally I think thats fucking stupid. Thats not only blatantly untrue in regards to the actually intelligent antagonists they HAVE faced, hes also just not that smart. When he presents the ultimatum, among other things, Toothless could literally just shoot him. When he shows up in Hiccup's hut, Toothless could literally just shoot him. Even if hes fireproof (which i dont remember if he is) hes not momentum proof. A better point of interest on Grimmel would have been, "Hes the first villain weve really seen actively murder dragons." (Unincluding the red death). Which, ok, maybe. Hes still boring.

The designs. the designsbfurghensnebdndbd d

OKOK SO. Lets start simple. Toothless is so chunky. They really didn't understand what makes Toothless intimidating. Hes scary because hes sleek and aerodynamic and not because hes a beefy macho wrestler. Hes a panther! Thats the intimidation!!! And i guess I cant put it off anymore so lets talk about the Kids Youtube monstrosity this film gave us i guess.

The lightfury is... a mess. in every way. The dragons in the series are very dramatic and stylised, sure, but in a very intentional way. A Monstrous Nightmare's teeth are in no way practical but they go with the big bad carnivore idea. A Deadly Nadder is not at all expressive compared to other dragons but neither are birds, which it resembles. Most boulder class dragons would in no way be able to fly, but it adds to the idea that they are heavily armoured and underestimated. In the case of the Nightfury, it makes sense from an evolutionary standpoint. It has large eyes because it lives in dark coastal caves. Its black because it is mostly nocturnal with hunting. It has echolocation BECAUSE of said dark coastal caves. However, when it comes to the lightfury, the design is... lacking. Smushed face not at all practical for fishing. Certain bird of prey and even dinosaurs (e.g spinosaurus) have distinctively long, thin mouths/beaks FOR FISHING. Lightfuries are not aquatic, and since they are presumably an evolution branch away from nightfuries, they probably cant spend too long in the water. Lightfuries have strangely smooth, round features. Its tail fins and wings being round make. next to zero sense. For the first film the creators took a pilots class to understand how flying works. I didnt. but i dont think that work, especially not for one of the fastest dragons. Its legs are weirdly shaped and It. Fucking. Sparkles. Its sparkly. Its 2019 fella I thought we learnt our lesson with Twilight. Shes so unneccessarily feminine its gross. And sure, The idea of variation between sex is shown but in very minor incidences. For example, The main differences between male and female Nadders are the curvature of the horn on the nose and which jaw is out more (overbite/underbite but idk which is which).

The Lightfury is also. Mean? Literally a softcore manic pixie dream girl? Its not even the cliche of like, she teaches him about the wild while he teaches her about stuff he learnt in "captivity" and theyre both endeared by the others ideas and home lives. She actively puts him down for everything and leads him on at the same time? its very strange. Also, Toothless' mating dances couldve worked on a Nightfury. We dont know. Theyre different species at the end of the day.

And the worst part about the Lightfury to me is that all of these issues are so easily solvable. For design, you have at least 2 options:

1. Make her a Nightfury.

I recognise they made her white so they were easy to tell apart. solution: Albino. done.

2. Make her a variation of Nightfury.

Plenty of people on this site have pointed out itd be plausible that there are, for example, Northern Nightfuries that live in harshly cold environments and are bulky and stong! Toothless seems like a wifeguy anyway let the man have a beefy wife

I've expressed this before, but I think that the ending is very lazy. Just tacking it on at the end that they have to leave bc they dont want more films. I have read the books before. I dont remember a lot about them, but I do remember that very little tracks. Like a couple of character names and thats basically it. Theyve NEVER attempted to replicate the books before, why start at the end of the final film? Its not even like there was very much motivation behind it. The dragon riders always win. I genuinely believe that the third film would have benefited from killing off Snotlout.

And yeah. I love him, hes my favourite character, this blog is centered around how much i hate his shitty dad. But his character went NO WHERE in the last film. Id even argue he got worse. Snotlout is a character where a lot of the appeal comes from the hope that he will be better. And he is! Compare his behaviour from The first few episodes of Riders Of Berk to the end of Defenders Of Berk. There is probably less than a year between them and it is night and day. He goes from being a school ground bully who neglects and actively deprives his dragon of sleep to someone who would maim, kill, die for him. You get to Race To The Edge and he is still the same cocky asshole, but he cares so deeply about his friends. He is inconsolable for days when Hookfang is thought to be leaving him. He cries of happiness at the wedding of his cousin and the girl he liked. He shows, more than probably anyone in the series, incredible growth. And then The Hidden World happens. To name a few things, he:

- Flirts relentlessly with his aunt

- Mocks his cousin's recently dead father ("Who died and made you chief?)

- Competes for power with Hiccup

And I think that killing him off would check the boxes of being closer tied with the books, Giving him a full redemption, and giving Hiccup a (albeit extreme) reason to send the dragons away. At that point Hiccup would have lost his mother (although she lived), his father, his leg, and his cousin (or best friend depending on interpretation) to dragons or to fighting FOR dragons. Thats got to be enough at some point.

Back on the subject of Hiccup, he was so... off. He's an absolute nerd when it comes to dragons (/pos)! He would never find a species of dragon and get upset that Toothless spent time with it, especially not A FURY???? He spends the whole film talking about Toothless and the Lightfury as if hes an over protective dad which again leads back to the ides of DeBlois not understanding the dragons fundamentally. The joke, to my understanding, is meant to be that he is treating his pet like his son that just started dating. But Toothless isnt his pet. Toothless is his friend. Thats not the relationship at all. And again, Hiccup wouldn'nt be??? upset???over that???

Ruffnut lost ALL of her nuance and interest and is now just "stupid." Tuff is... okay, i guess. Fishlegs is reduced to being motherly and feminine when hes otherwise CONSTANTLY shown being extremely intelligent and would also NEVER leave out Meatlug???? Ive already spoken about Snotlout, and Astrid is now just kind of. Hiccup's sidekick?? What happened she was literally so cool and stern and cutthroat and genuinely had chemistry with Hiccup. Now shes just there to give him advice. Dont get me wrong, I love the conversational parallels that have with the first movie, but they dont feel earned. they feel like its trying to leech off of nostalgia of the first movie. She also looks physically very different for some reason.

TL:DR, The Hidden World is a movie aimed at kids for a franchise that was always aimed at families. the themes are dull, characters are ooc, designs are ugly, and the problems are easy fixes

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thatdeadaquarius · 1 year

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PLS YOU’RE SO FUNNY your pspspsps is too strong I’m back with more asks hello how are you I’m loving your takes on sagau! I thought of a contribution by the power of the pspsps imagine like the languages in teyvat are based on the nations’ real life counterparts (like Japanese for Inazuma) but like only loosely. So creator knows like exactly 3 words in Japanese and think they’re gonna take that and somehow make it work but they get there and understand NOTHING. They finally understand like one word but turns out it means something completely different in this version of “Japanese” so they think someone told them hi and they said hi back but they’re just going around saying “fuck” and no one wants to tell them

ANOTHER ONE YUHSSS LURING BACK IN FOR MORE im doing well tysm for asking ya flatterer!!

aw u think im funny??!! 🥰 well geez here i thought i was just going feral over sagau/isekai genshin stuff and it was like a dam burst and all yall were just coming down with me funny or not 🤷‍♂️

(Hey askers look ive got cookies 🍪🍪🍪 :) if u ask smth ill give u one!!)

Nice to know the humor translates, but holy fuck this ask is like 10x funnier than anything ive written so far or come up with LMAO PLEASE NO ONE WANTS TO TELL YOU-

____________

This is exactly what Portugese vs. Spanish is like i stg

Im not fluent yet but i know a decent amount of spanish at this point, but when i was first learning it i ran into some Portuguese and couldnt really read it and was like?? Oh ok maybe this is too many vocab words i dont get yet, and showed it to another person who spoke some Spanish and they were like ".. Uh, wtf is that?? What is that???🧐😟 Thats not even Spanish, but why is it almost???" And they just kept trying to read it so hard bc they thought it was so close it should work 😭

Anyway the point is i feel like that is just you in this scenario over and over again lol

Its like teaching a little kid language and they happen to pick up the cusswords the best,

Omfg ur around Beidou about to head to Inazuma (bc i like to think u traveling with Aether/Lumine and they r sweet enough not to abandon ur weird ass)

And Beidou just keeps cussing in Liyue's-almost-Mandarian-Chinese-but-not, and ur like trying to pick smth up bc it sucks none of ur little bits and pieces of lang. from ur world have worked so far, and she keeps saying this one word over and over again, to this angry looking Liyue guy, oh hey wait a minute, that's the Mandarin word for "hello"!! Maybe she's using it sarcastically?? She smiled afterward, oh Kazuha's laughing!! Maybe it means smth different? But they still look positive abt it so eh, cant hurt, and you sort of know how to say it!!

"你好 !! (nǐhǎo)", you do a little wave too :)

(I just used straight mandarin for this pls tell me if not right-)

Hey you did it! Sort of, you didn't really do the tones right, and you look over to see if they got it, and oop-

Everybody froze and looked at you, before Beidou starts screaming laughing, Kazhua's wheezing so hard he's leaning on a barrel nearby, the traveler is trying to keep it together, but u can see Beidou's ridiculous laugh is contagious and is spreading rapidly to crew members and to the traveler,,

The angry Liyuean man no longer looks angry, oh, he's leaving, welp, you can tell u did smth funny, but u havent a clue what u actually said

Every now and then Beidou will come up to you and try to teach u more Liyuean words, but anytime the traveler sees it they shoo her off, she has a shit-eating grin on her face, while the traveler looks unamused or is at least trying to hide their amusement

(There r so many characters that will take advantage of this and only try to teach you cuss words, at least at first, CHILDE, kaveh, VENTI, Itto, BEIDOU, Xinqiu the little prankster, ppl i can think of quickly god i gotta look at a character list)

Beidou BEAMS anytime u say "nîhâo" now, and gives u a thumbs up everytime 👍

You learn much later that you probably should just give up trying to say any of your world's lang. That sound equivalent to each genshin country's lang. bc apparently the few words you know from them are either random shit like "egg, bowl, etc." Or straight up explicit "fuck, shit, piss etc."

__________

I didnt have too much to add bc that is a GREAT AND HILARIOUS idea all on its own (esp if u did it in front of more serious characters or situation)

So pls forgive if lackluster writing happened!!

THANK YOU FOR THE ASK!! COME AGAIN!! AND YOU'LL GET A FREE COOKIE!! :]

✨️🍪✨️

Cheers,

🌒🌧🌊Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

#genshin imagines #genshin impact #sagau #gender neutral reader #genshin sagau #genshin sagau ideas #my asks #ask box open #please send asks #come hither #i have cookies #pspspspsps #genshin isekai #genshin god reader

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irrigos · 9 months

Text

interpreters in fallen london, ranked by how badly they violate the Code of Professional Conduct

I'm using the Registry of Interpreters for the Deaf's CPC, because thats what I learned. none of these characters would actually fall under the jurisdiction of RID, because its an American organization. and also. was founded in 1964. I also acknowledge that none of the clients these interpreters are interpreting for are, in fact, deaf, but I don't know anything about spoken language interpreting, and I feel like the needs of these specific clients are more akin to the interpreting needs of deaf clients I've had than anything else. (Also, the CPC calls them "consumers", I prefer "clients" because that's what I learned, but people will use either and it doesn't matter that much)

This post is very long, and there's not even that many people on it! I could have made it shorter, but I already didn't do that. You're the one who chose to read it! That's not my problem!

The CPC:

RID's Code of Professional Conduct was written in collaboration with the National Association of the Deaf in 2005 (replacing their prior Code of Ethics). It has 7 tenets, which each have several points of illustrative behaviors. I decided to cite the specific illustrative behaviors that these interpreters fail to perform, because I thought that would be more interesting and thorough. And no one will ever accuse me of not being thorough.

Here is the CPC presented in American Sign Language, and here it is in written English. It's not a very long or complex document, if you're interested in reading it yourself. I can't really imagine anyone WOULD be that interested in the code of conduct for a profession you're not in, unless you're like... me... but hey, there it is.

Barqujin:

Batachikhan's interpreter in Mask of the Rose. He wants to leave the amber warrens beneath London and go start a shop, but she thinks it's a bad idea. Purposefully interprets Batachikhan incorrectly to try to convince the player to help with her plan instead (facilitating a slower, more planned introduction of Rubbery Men into London society.) Is clearly threatened by the player character also being able to understand Batachikhan, since she spent years with the Rubberies learning their ways and you're just some dipshit. Also can have a threesome with the player and Batachikhan.

Tenets violated:

2.3 ("Render the message faithfully by conveying the content and spirit of what is being communicated, using language most readily understood by consumers, and correcting errors discreetly and expeditiously.") She is very much not faithfully rendering the message

4.1 ("Consider consumer requests or needs regarding language preferences, and render the message accordingly") This might seem like the same as 2.3, but this one focuses more on language preferences than content, eg using Signed Exact English instead of pure ASL if that is what the client prefers. So this would be like when Batachikhan is writing and breaks the chalk, and Barqujin gets annoyed and refuses to get more. Not respecting the method by which her client would like to communicate.

Conclusion:

I put her first on the list (so, least bad) because she at least DOES seem to care about Batachikhan and his well-being, even if she's pretty shitty about it. Also, I'm counting the time she spent in the amber warrens as "professional development", so she IS fulfilling tenet 7.0 ("Interpreters engage in professional development.") although I don't know how many CEUs that would be worth. Really, I think Barqujin is a good example for why the Americans with Disabilities Act says that a "companion" (family member, guardian, friend, religious leader, etc) cannot be counted as a qualified interpreter in most circumstances. Barqujin lacks the impartiality required to be an effective interpreter!!

The Sagacious Ape

In the ambition Hearts Desire, your monkey friend Gregory Beechwood hires an interpreter from the Empire of Hands to facilitate him actually having a conversation with you. Probably should come before Barqujin, technically, as her misconduct is probably worse (it's pretty bad to purposefully interpret something incorrectly because YOU think they should have said something different! that is generally Frowned Upon!) but he bothers me more. Also you could argue that Barqujin is not operating in the game as a Certified Interpreter who is bound by the code of conduct, but as a bilingual friend doing a favor, so… idk. Barqujin gets to be less bad because the Sagacious Ape bothers me so much more.

Tenets violated:

2.2 (“Assess consumer needs and the interpreting situation before and during the assignment and make adjustments as needed.”) Maybe a nitpick to start us off, but I was trained to always show up at least 15 minutes early, so you can meet with your client for a bit and figure out their linguistic needs. And the Sagacious Ape did not do that, although I SUPPOSE I can allow for the possibility that they met sometime off-screen.

I GUESS. 2.3 (Render the message faithfully, etc.) Tries to downplay Beechwood's tone/language use. He keeps making little asides objecting to Beechwood's swearing, or doing what seems to be downplaying the intended tone. Sorry, Mr Ape Interpreter. Gregory Beechwood wants to say fuck and you and I both know it. You gotta say the fuck word.

2.5 (“Refrain from providing counsel, advice, or personal opinions.”) Guessed what Beechwood wanted from the Marvelous before Beechwood said anything. You are not a participant in this conversation, man! You don't get to give your input here!

Conclusion:

Unfortunately, I am in love with Barqujin so she gets a little more leeway than the Sagacious Ape. And he's also the only one on this list who is licensed, so he has no excuse. But frankly, worse than the CPC violations, his greatest crime was doing my two biggest interpreter pet peeves. 1. He doesn't interpret into first person language (“He says he's sorry“ should instead be ”I'm sorry.“ This is a thing you learn in literally day 1 of an Interpreter Training Program.) 2. He calls himself a translator and not an interpreter, even though he is interpreting and not translating (I actually emailed FBG about this when it came up with the last election, but I don't know if they went back and fixed it in HD, too. I'd already beaten it by then. But a translator takes a static text in one language and converts it into another language, and an interpreter takes a live text in one language and converts it into another. An interpreter is working in the moment, so you'd have one at doctors appointments or presentations or plays, and a translator is working over time, so you'd hire a translator to work on a book or an article or a poem. I have done lots of interpreting and very little translating.) So, sorry Sagacious Ape. We ARE voting you off the island.

A small addendum to the entry on the Sagacious Ape- I couldn't find a good way to fit this in, but he reminds me almost more of a Deaf Interpreter than an Interpreter for the Deaf. A Hearing interpreter (or an interpreter for the deaf) would be a Hearing person who is fluent in both sign language and English (or, well, probably any spoken language, really) and interprets between the two. A Deaf interpreter is one who is themselves Deaf. Their role is to take the interpretation from the Hearing Interpreter and make it into more natural, fluent sign language, and to take the sign language of the client and make it easier for the Hearing interpreter to interpret correctly. They primarily work with people who are multiply disabled, or have some other language disability. The situations I've seen where a Deaf interpreter has also been hired have been for things like the client being DeafBlind, the client having cerebral palsy, or the client experienced language deprivation and isn't fluent in sign language. I think the Sagacious Ape is a little more like a Deaf interpreter because, while monkeys in Fallen London CAN speak (clearly, as the Sagacious Ape can!) Beechwood is not able to communicate in any language, so the Sagacious Ape is interpreting off of things like gestures and grunts. And that's closer to what I've seen Deaf interpreters do with clients who went through language deprivation than it is to any interpreting work I've ever done. Just a fun thought I wanted to share, even though it's not really relevant to the list.

The Nocturnal Landscape Artist

The Nocturnal Landscape Artist (who is also sometimes in game referred to as the Nocturnal Landscape Painter) was the Tentacled Entrepreneur's interpreter during the election of 1898, and was fired later, in Helicon House. I hate him terribly, and he's my favorite representation of an interpreter in the game.

Tenets violated:

1.1 (”Share assignment-related information only on a confidential and “as needed” basis.”) This might be a bit of a stretch, but during the election, you could get drunk with him and he'd talk a little shit about how actually TE doesn't know anything and HE'S the real brains here. Obviously this is incredibly inappropriate, but I'm also gonna say it's breaking confidentiality. Yknow. Among other problems.

2.5 (“Refrain from providing counsel, advice, or personal opinions.”) He was involved in TE's mayoral campaign to provide counsel and advice, while also providing interpreting services

3.5 ("Conduct and present themselves in an unobtrusive manner and exercise care in choice of attire.") I guess it's a little different for him, because he's not ACTUALLY a sign language interpreter, but generally speaking, I always had a VERY strict dress code, which boiled down to basically wearing only solid, dark colors, like black or navy. I guess they don't really describe the Painter in the game that much, but I mean… look at this guy. Do you think this guy is capable of being unobtrusive? I do not.

3.8 ("Avoid actual or perceived conflicts of interest that might cause harm or interfere with the effectiveness of interpreting services." The CPC defines a conflict of interest as "A conflict between the private interests (personal, financial, or professional) and the official or professional responsibilities of an interpreter in a position of trust, whether actual or perceived, deriving from a specific interpreting situation.") The Artist is literally involved with TE to better himself. During the election, he one time says ”We'll be the mayor“ which is. Yikes, man.

3.10 (”Refrain from using confidential interpreted information for the benefit of personal or professional affiliations or entities.“ See above.)

6.6 ("Refrain from harassment or coercion before, during, or after the provision of interpreting services.") Shows up at TE's art show without being invited, in an attempt to berate him. Cringe.

Conclusion:

"He needs me. As a teacher. A mentor. Fortunately, he does act on my advice. An' we both have the same goals. …You have to keep this to yourself. He's the money, but I'm the brains. We'll be mayor, just you see." BAD!!! I hate this man!! But the reason he's my favorite representation of an interpreter I've seen in this game, and quite possibly ANY game, is that… I've totally met this guy. Every Deaf person I know who has needed an interpreter has met this guy. There is a certain kind of person who becomes an interpreter (or really goes into any field that involves working closely with a marginalized group) primarily because they think that these poor people need their HELP. THEY know what's best for their clients! And they're going to see that done! Client's input be damned! It makes my skin crawl. The role of an interpreter is complex, and there are a lot of different opinions about how much an interpreter should interpret cultures as well as language, and this is made even MORE complex when you're interpreting for someone who is marginalized BECAUSE of this culture and language. But the Nocturnal Landscape Painter is clearly convinced that TE is going about everything wrong, and he's using his position as TE's interpreter to try to force him into what the Painter thinks is correct. And then has a big baby tantrum when TE does what he wanted to do anyway! It's no wonder they aren't friends anymore, if they ever were to begin with. I was glad that I got to throw this dude out of Helicon House. Wish I could do the same to everyone in my interpreting training cohort who thought it was their role to help all these poor sad Deaf people who couldn't get by without us. Gross.

In conclusion:

#fallen london #mask of the rose #this is the most ive read the CPC since like. 2018 lmao #do you all still like me even though this post is almost 2k words

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