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#some people probably don't even realize it and throw a fit and
sunderwight · 3 months
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Shen Yuan who glitches in his transmigration, but the original Shen Qingqiu still dies of a qi deviation.
So the System still needs someone with narrative relevance to throw Luo Binghe into the Abyss. In a fit of desperation, it contrives circumstances after Shen Qingqiu's death to move Luo Binghe to An Ding Peak (not that difficult), and then the System makes Shang Qinghua be Luo Binghe's new scum master who casts him down.
Airplane's thrilled, really. Cultivators aren't supposed to get ulcers but damned if he doesn't come close to one anyway. Between Shen Qingqiu and then just a while later Liu Qingge both dying from qi deviations, and Shang Qinghua looking like a stiff breeze could take him out any day now, poor Mu Qingfang is also just about at his wits' end.
But it's not all bad news! On An Ding Peak, Luo Binghe actually finds himself surrounded by the kinds of people who are accustomed to being bullied by the rest of the sect. So they're pretty sympathetic to him, and it's easier for someone with basic laboring skills to advance on that peak too. His chores don't decrease too much, but he actually gets rewarded for doing them well, and no one tries to kick him out of the dorms or anything. Shang Qinghua doesn't either go out of his way to bully or praise Luo Binghe, correctly reasoning that his best shot at not getting a gruesome death is to just be a more forgettable bad guy than an abusive dirtbag or a heart-wrenching betrayal. He doesn't sabotage Luo Binghe's cultivation (no point, and it would just farm resentment later) but he also doesn't go out of his way to help him improve (not gonna arm his inevitable maybe-probably-murderer with better weapons!), so Luo Binghe's situation sees an overall improvement but not the zero-to-hero treatment he'd have got with Shen Yuan either.
When Shang Qinghua shoves Luo Binghe into the Abyss (he just full on picks him up and tosses him like a sack of beans, better to rip it off quick like a bandage), LBH is upset, but he's not especially surprised or dismayed about Shang Qinghua's part in it. Later on he'll be kind of confused, because he just assumed that of course the righteous sect cultivator would abhor the demon, but it turns out Shang Qinghua has been working for a demon since before Luo Binghe even came to the sect? But then it still kind of makes sense because a Heavenly Demon would definitely pose a risk to Mobei Jun and to Mobei Jun's rule. Shang Qinghua, he supposes, is just really loyal to his specific demon.
Luo Binghe's subsequent revenge quest is also somewhat mitigated by the Abyss actually not being that bad.
The Abyss is not actually that bad thanks to the glitched out Shen Yuan having been camping there for several years now.
So when Shen Yuan's transmigration failed it failed because he "woke up" during the process, realized where the System intended to put him, was like no way in goddamn hell am I being that guy about it, and actually kind of won the ensuing tug-of-war. The System couldn't put him in Shen Qingqiu but Shen Yuan didn't want to go back to his dead body either, so he ended up stuck in the nearest available space for lost interdimensional beings. Which was the Endless Abyss.
Luckily Shen Yuan's quasi-transmigrated imparted an equivalent cultivation level as Shen Jiu's to him, and the glitch made him able to sense and manipulate certain extra-dimensional energies, so he manifested as this weird godlike being able to manipulate and control aspects of the Abyss. So he set about transforming Airplane's Torment Nexus into a viable ecosystem (the current version would not be anything approaching sustainable were it not for divine/narrative intervention, and is constantly on the verge of destabilizing into unlivable ruin that would only be fit for some particularly hardy microorganisms).
It's still like, a monster land full of demonic creatures and terrifying phenomenon, but with Shen Yuan's assistance it becomes something more like a demonic wildlife reserve than a dimensional horror plane. Though it is still a dimensional horror plane, and Shen Yuan is its chief dimensional horror. He treats it sort of like those dungeon building or wildlife park sims, figuring out how to keep everything in balance while still preserving all the interesting parts. A lot of the extreme survival issues of the Abyss are more of a result of it being environmentally unstable than a result of its actual denizens, and once he smooths out a lot of the messy dimensional edges and creates stable vents for the fluctuating energy run-off, the demonic inhabits start behaving less like horror movie monsters and more like animals. They're still wild and dangerous and prone to killing one another, but also more cautious, and able to access enough stable resources that they can even start to be picky about what they pursue.
Turns out that a lot of creatures in the Abyss actually don't like fighting and dying and being brutally injured on a regular basis, even if they can heal from it!
Shen Yuan has even discovered that some like chin scritches (he's not terribly worried about habituating them to people, given how rarely any people actually access the Abyss, but also because he's not really all that people-ish himself these days).
This means that one of Luo Binghe's first encounters with the horrible creatures of the Abyss, is in fact a pack of wolf-like monsters thoroughly avoiding an actual fight with him. In fact most of the denizens of the Abyss just avoid him. They can smell the Heavenly Demon energy rolling off of him, and given the current abundance of alternatives to dealing with that, virtually none of the monsters actually choose to challenge him. There are still a few that will go after anything that's bleeding, but that problem stops once Luo Binghe's physiology heals his wounds, which takes like... a couple hours, max.
Despite the stories he's heard, Luo Binghe is relieved to find that the Abyss is not quite so terrible as all that. Normal survival skills suffice for seeing him through much of it. He's able to hunt for food, scavenge for tools, and even finds potable water fairly easily. After a few weeks, he also comes across a ruin which seems to be inhabited.
The being inhabiting it is plainly a god, although he demurs and refutes such assertions whenever Binghe is too frank. He's a strange being, at turns looking like some queer approximation of a human, at other times blinking and winking in and out of existence, in patterns of strange lights and oddly geometrical fire. But he's surprisingly not hostile, letting Binghe rest in his residence, and even directing him towards points of interest. Accompanying him, too, though he seems to think that Binghe doesn't notice the odd almost spiderweb-like patterns that appear on things which he's influencing. The god calls himself The Peerless One, or at least that's what Luo Binghe infers from some writings on the ruin. The Peerless One offers instruction, seemingly without thinking about it, and gets flustered at being addressed by title, so Binghe also begins to refer to him as Shizun after a while.
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moonsaver · 5 months
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Do you have any thoughts about the opposite of the "Im afraid to confess because our friendship could get ruined"? As in, "I'm afraid to reject you because I don't want to lose this friendship so I accept your confession even though I don't feel that way for you and never will".
Like the protagonist tries to convince themselves that this is just like being friends only that we now kiss (and more). I feel like it would fit with a yandere that is a bit delusional or desperate, eveb insecure so whenever the protagonist doesnt seem as into this relationship as them, they just try to convince themselves otherwise, or love bomb the protagonist.
Idk lately Ive been into reversing the tropes and I found this one particularly interesting to me when it comes to a yandere. In HSR i was thinking of Argenti as he seems like the delusional type. Or even Aventurine who would have had to put down a lot of walls to be friends with you and then even more walls just to confess, so rejecting him doesnt seem like an option to the protag (out of pity and care).
THIS THIS THIS!!!! qnon ur brain is so wrinkly and soggy with brain juice..... this used to be my favorite trope at some point idk why i forgot about it i remember eating up any fanfics out there based on this
Tw: yandere (obv), manipulation, intimacy (mainly romantic, only hints of sexual), emotional blackmailing, whatever yadda yadda
But anyways, under the cut!
Okay, so, I imagine this is possible with literally... almost all of hsr's cast. Mainly because most of them have such tragic backstories, and most of them out of that have a really shrewd and cunning mind, so they'll exploit this to hell and back.
I also imagine this is with a people pleasing reader, so lets go with a bit of implication of that.
Anyways, since Aventurine and Argenti are the ones mentioned specifically, I'll probably dive in on them first.
Aventurine is so hard to not feel pity for. Every stolen glance at the marking on his neck makes you feel worse and worse for "rejecting him", knowing he's been throwing signs of wanting more than a friendship quite possibly everywhere and you're most likely ignoring them in hopes of keeping your friendship. It's not like he hasn't quite caught on, either. He knows people's hearts quite well. And where there's opportunity, he seizes it.
It's a bit frustrating for him – just why can't you see he wants more? Or rather, just why aren't you accepting him? You're the first thing on his mind when he wakes up, when he clutches his chip and bets on his life, the last thing on his mind when he goes to sleep. Hell, he's even tried to dream of you, forcefully. But then he realizes.. how easy you are to just push around. He goes ahead with the confession, and it's almost a sadistic kind of pleasure when he sees you even try and stutter out any kind of a rejection when he's leaning in a perfect angle that shows off his little marking (out of all the times he curses it, it seems like this time it's worked in his favor). He watches carefully as your eyes nervously flit to his neck and you shut up immediately for a second, before accepting. And when you do.. he's over the moon! Coddles you, kisses your cheeks, becomes so much more grabby, as his keen eyes watch your discomfort. Well.. you didn't reject him, so this is what you should expect.
Again, the frustration doesn't wear off easily, but just seeing you writhe and try to create distance while he suffocates you in affection far from platonic nature, is so sadistically pleasuring to him. He loves watching you in that state, bending to his will so easily, as he waits for you to snap. But he'll probably find it easier to squeeze water out of a rock than to squeeze a rejection out of you – which is precisely what he exploits. You're not going anywhere, are you? He puts on his best, pleading little eyes that he used to have to put on, shaking, trembling voice, desperate hands that cling to you; all the things he acts out like his life depends on it when he senses even a waver of your hesitation.
Oh, fine.. he hates seeing you so queasy almost all the time, so he'll give you a reprieve from time to time. Plans and schedules things you used to do "back when you were friends" (he emphasizes this – you don't think you can just ignore everything, right?), and makes sure to at least crack a few smiles and giggles from you. Of course.. his hand is still loosely hanging around your waist, pecks you on the lips from time to time, just as a small reminder of what you guys really are now.
Argenti on the other hand, has no awareness of your discomfort at all.
He's like a huge dog, the way he's so happy about you accepting his confession and doesn't even stop to think afterwards just why you were so hesitant during it.
Constantly praises you, and it's not soon before it gets to a more intimate nature. He wants to do all the romantic things – kissing under the rain, protecting you from something, twirling you in the air and then kissing you again after putting you down, telling everyone proudly that you two are a couple, buying more and more "romantic" gifts that turn more intimate sooner or later. You have no way out of this without completely ruining everything.
It's.. almost painful the way he doesn't realise. At some point your discomfort probably gets so.. obvious, but he just shrugs it off; perhaps he hasn't been paying you enough attention? Or you're just too shy to ask something of him? Oh, how sweet! How adorable! He thinks. He simply falls deeper and deeper into this delusion, stringing you along and stretching your patience thin. Unfortunately, unlike Aventurine, you can't find most, if any bits of the things you both used to do as platonic companions in the relationship you have with Argenti. He's just a full-blown romantic who wants to do only that. It makes you even more queasy when people look at you in pity, if they realize just what happened between you two.
You can't back out, even if you tried. If you somehow manage to find a way to squeeze out a rejection, or have any kind of a reservation about things getting more intimate/romantic stuff, he's so devastated. Did he do something wrong? Perhaps he's not as experienced as you wanted him to be? Or you're not satisfied with some of the things he's said? Don't fret, he's right on it! Constantly holding you so close you're afraid your bones will break, whispering incessant praises into your ear that slowly spiral into affirmations that you belong to him, spoiled rotten with everything you want; yet, even then.. you can't shake off the intention they were given in. Not when you're suffocated by it.
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tinandabin · 8 months
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SAGAU but the the reader is the ACTUAL creator
Thorny love: part 5
Previous part: part 4
a/n: am I back from the dead? I dunno, but yesterday night I felt like writing and wrote another part. so, I decided to publish it here also!
________
"Yo-Your Grace... You are finally here.." Ei spoke, her eyes wide and her legs shaking a bit. It almost looked like she was gonna cry. However, her face hardened up as soon as more people started gathering around you and her. Perhaps, you were the only one to catch a glimpse of her expression. She is an Archon, she too has a reputation to uphold in Inazuma, after all. "Hello, Ei. How have you been?" You smiled at her, hand going up to ruffle her hair. Revelyn still hadn't let go of your robe, her hold on it tightened a bit.
Ei's breath hitched as soon as your hand messed with her hair. "I'm..." She tried to find the right words to express her feelings, but she couldn't. How can she explain that she felt as if a part of her had been torn from her when you left her? It felt as if...she had been plunged into never-ending despair and loneliness. She missed you, very dearly. The place where her heart should have been, felt strangely empty without your embrace, your smile, your eyes, you.
Your hand retreated soon enough, "You don't have to answer, Ei." You gently told her, sensing her inner turmoil. It hurt you to leave your creations suffering and in agony, it truly did so. But some actions are sadly enough, necessary.
Ei smiled and nodded, hand coming to hold yours when she saw another hand grasping your robe. Immediately, she looked at the culprit only to see the face of the impostor. How dare she even show her face here after all she did? The thought made her scoff. She not only deceived the Archons but even you. The nerve of some people.. And now she acts all angelic and needy when you show up? But of course, Ei won't say anything. Not in front of you. 
"And who might be the coward behind you, Your Grace?" Ei gestured towards Revelyn behind you. You smiled beamingly, gently prying Revelyn from behind you. "Oh, come now, Ei, you don't remember her?" You asked her innocently, quickly realizing the jab she was throwing towards Revelyn, but brushing it off. You don't wish for an argument to start over here, of all places. 
Ei stared at Revelyn for a moment, taking your hint to not taunt her. "I do, Your Grace. How could I not?" 
"I'm glad to know so, " You put your hands on Revelyn's shoulder, your touch sending an electrifying shock of pleasure through her body. "Everyone misunderstood Revelyn. She's a very sweet and angelic girl. I'm sure she will fit right back in, hm?" 
Revelyn stood awkwardly, clearly wanting to be anywhere but here. She decided to keep up her act of cowardice until you left. "Um.. Hi," Her meek voice spoke up, a slight tremble to it. She batted her eyelashes at Ei, smiling softly. "I'm Revelyn.. Revelyn Aniela. " 
The surname struck some nostalgic feeling inside you. You had a brief feeling that perhaps you had heard this somewhere before, that perhaps someone dear to you held the same surname. Someone close to your heart, your mind, your soul- but who? Who was that? You can't recall. Aniela. Aniela. Aniela. So familiar, yet so distinct. Maybe it was simply the name of a friend long gone, you would love to give yourself this benefit of doubt, but you're not the kind of person to do that. You're the Creator for fuck's sake, if you're remembering something, then that must be because it's important! It was of significance, you wouldn't just remember a random surname, right? Right...?
You shook your head, deciding you're indeed giving yourself the benefit of the doubt because you're too old to deal with this detective stuff. Frankly enough, if you think about it more, you'll probably just get a headache. Best to leave it be, now. You'll just ask Seraphina to play detective, like always. You cleared your throat. "So, what are we waiting for? Shall we go?" 
Ei nodded right away, grabbing your hand and Intertwining your fingers. "As you wish, Your Grace. " 
Revelyn was left behind to catch up. 
__________
A few days passed in Inazuma without much commotion. You spent most of the time with Ei, Revelyn of course stuck around so long as you were there. Personally, you were tired of both of them. They need to stop clinging to you like you're their mother. Ei, you understood why she clinged to you, considering she didn't see you for months on end, but Revelyn, who lived with you for like... the past month, it wasn't very understandable. Lile be for real, Revelyn. You not tired yet? Like. Girl. Stop embarrassing yourself and get some self respect and go where you're actually wanted. 
So, for both your sanity and their's (Lie), you decided to leave both of them together to socialize and become the best of best friends. (Lie. You just wanted time to yourself and wanted to meet Yae Miko.) Of course, you were, for the first time, surprised to see both Ei and Revelyn unite together. Merely for the purpose of notetting you leave but hey, progress! They atleast united for a common goal, no matter how troublesome that may be for you. 
Their combined forces weren't enough to deter you, in the end, you won and they were forced to talk to each other or sulk together, or maybe, a rare possibility, but have a heated make-out session. Who knows. Whatever works, works. They're on their own now and you're on your own, to meet Yae Miko and have a heated make-out session with her perhaps. It won't happen, maybe, but the thought is entertaining though. You're like, 93% certain Miko would agree if you asked. It's not like she hasn't suggested that before. Ah, enough thoughts. You're here. 
"Good grace, it's such a heavy task to climb these hills to just be graced by your presence, Miko, " You let out a whine, leaning against one of thr shrine. "You should know my old bones can't hold for long-" A book was placed against your lips and a fluffy, really fluffy and soft, tail caressed your thigh sneakily. "My my, Your Divinity, you ought to know, I don't fancy you saying those words. You look very beautiful, and ravishing, might I add. " Yae Miko said, leaning in close to you with a smirk on her face. 
You placed a hand on her wrist, gently removing the book. "I'm happy you think so, but might I say, you look even more delightful, " You replied back with a grin. This flirty playful banter was always your favorite thing to do in Inazuma, apart from watching Revelyn and Ei be at their throats, of course. "Oh please, Your Divinity, you flatter me. But we both know, you're the most beautiful-" You placed a finger on her lips. "Ahhh, shhh. Nothing more to speak of this topic. You can't argue with me on this, you're, of course, the most stunning woman in Inazuma, " 
Miko let out an offended gasp, "Inazuma only? Is that my beauty's worth to you, Your Divinity? I'm offended, " She pouted, clearly putting up an act just for you. 
"No no, my dear. I meant in whole Teyvat. It would be a crime for me to think your beauty isn't other worldly, " 
And this playful banter continued on. 
_________
On the other side, Revelyn and Ei were indeed having a heated make-out session. Not the kind you're thinking of. 
"Oh, so as soon as my graceful creator leaves, you suddenly drop the act of cowardice?" Ei stared at Revelyn, a cold and unrelenting aura around her. 
"Your creator...? Psssh," Revelyn let out a mocking laugh, "Please. Your words are blatantly false!" She glared at Ei, her fists clenching at her sides. 
"Shut up, you witch, you casted a spell of sorts on my graceful creator, didn't you? That's why she is completely and utterly fooled by you!" 
"Oh? I'll cast a spell on you too and turn you into a monkey if you don't shut up!"
You walked in with a smile. "Guys. I just had a make-out session with Miko-"
________
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a/n: hi! if yr name is cut, then that means I couldn't tag you. if in the next part I won't be able to tag you, then your name will be removed from the taglist. please ask me to tag you again in the LATEST part to be readded to the taglist! thank you (❁´◡`❁)
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flaresemily · 1 month
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The past rewritten itself (Qin Shi Huang)
This is actually one of my drafts that I have been keeping for a long time now so...ENJOY!!
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Being an emperor has its perks. And being forced into a marriage well…that doesn't fit right. But that's what happens to Qin Shi Huang.
He doesn't really love y/n but he doesn't hate her either. Well…just imagine them as…friends yeah! Friends after all friends don't betray each other right!....right?
You were walking towards your husband's room to give him the homemade mooncake you made with the chef/baker in the kitchen.
As you get closer, you hear some…uh well what they call the unholy sounds.
You were shocked and you dropped the mooncake. Qin probably heard the thud quickly get up and rush to the ‘door’.
As he opened the ‘door’ he saw the mess on the floor and saw your figure running away.
He realizes his mistake and quickly runs after you. (after he clean himself)
From them on,you never talked to him. Making him well…obsessed on getting you to pay attention to him. (You don't know he kill the woman he slept with)
The more days passed he always saw you talking to that one guard. He was so jealous he decided to accuse you of cheating.
It was your birthday that the whole of China is celebrating.
As you were sitting there drinking. Qin Shi Huang suddenly stood up and stand In front of the others.
“My dear beloved country, I have something to announce.”
Everyone was waiting.
And finally…
“The empress is cheating on me”
A lot of ‘ooh’ and ‘aah’ can be heard.
You were shocked.
That's when people started to ‘boo’ at you.
Throwing you things and insulting you.
For a few days or weeks you have mental breakdowns; he even accused you of being pregnant with another man's child.
But what he didn't expect is for you to get kidnapped and be tortured by his people. He didn't know that they were so loyal that they dared to kidnap the empress and give her a ‘taste of her own medicine’
He realizes it when one of the old couples came to his throne room and reported it to him.
He asks his guard to check your chamber. But you were nowhere to be found.
Then, he received another news that you are getting executed In front of others.
He quickly left his palace and went to the town's square.
There…the people tied you up to the poles they made just for you. They put on a small flame to burn your legs.
You were screaming and crying and begging to be let go. Trying to tell them you were innocent.
But they wouldn't listen and continue to torture you slowly and painfully.
Then, the final punishment came.
He saw what was about to happen and quickly shouted
“NO!!!”
And stab you were stabbed already. Not once….but multiple times.
And finally your eyes as if looking at him…look at him with hurtful betrayal eyes.
You love him so much and yet…this is what you get all because you just want to give him a mooncake. Then, if you didn't bring the mooncake would you still be alive?
You were left there…dying slowly as blood started to spill out of you.
He manages to get on ‘stage’ and cradle you in his arms sobbing.
“No…y/n sob don't please!” The man cried.
As the crowd begin to lessen he carries you in his arms but he was stopped by the guards who later on snatched the corpse from him.
All he can do is watch you get taken away again.
This…is what happens when you frame your own wife. Saying that she's been sleeping with a lot of men and accusing her of carrying another man's child…
When in reality…it was you (talking about himself not readers) all along.
In Valhalla
He was walking around searching for his room when he came across a beautiful woman…
She looks exactly like you.
And she was holding a child that looked exactly like him.
But the thing is, someone else wrap his arms on your waist pulling you closer.
And it was…none other than
Hades
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tacroyy · 1 year
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losing my shit about the two times vimes gets slapped by a woman in the guards books (night watch and snuff; spoilers for both below). terry pratchett is completely goddamn brilliant.
both times, it's near enough to the beginning of the plot that vimes is partially convinced he doesn't know what's going on and is still information gathering (so, working a little on autopilot, although thoughts are starting to coalesce). the women he encounters show up after a watershed moment—major transformative plot points on both occasions—and both help him and help move the narrative along with the information they provide. and this is my favorite detail—he's tired both times, too, and just needs to think, because of the amount of new information he's processing.
from night watch:
"I think perhaps I lost my memory when I was attacked," he said. That sounded good, he thought. What he really needed now was somewhere quiet, to think.
"Really? Perhaps I'm the Queen of Hersheba," said Rosie [Palm]. "Just remember, kind sir. I'm not doing this because I'm interested in you, although I'd admit to a macabre fascination about how long you're going to survive. If it hadn't been a cold wet night I'd have left you in the road. I'm a working girl, and I don't need trouble. But you look like a man who can lay his hands on a few dollars, and there will be a bill."
"I'll leave the money on the dressing table," said Vimes.
The slap in the face knocked him against the wall. /end quote
and from snuff:
She [Felicity Beedle] turned to Vimes. "It would seem, commander, that providence has brought you here in time to solve the murder of the goblin girl, who was an excellent pupil. I came up here as soon as I heard, but the goblins are used to undeserved and casual death. I"ll walk with you to the entrance, and then I've got a class to teach."
Vimes tugged at Feeny to make him keep up as they followed Miss Beedle and her charge toward the surface and blessed fresh air. He wondered what had become of the corpse. What did they do with their dead? Bury them, eat them, throw them on the midden? Or was he just not thinking right, a thought which itself had been knocking at his brain for some time. Without thinking, he said, "What else do you teach them, Miss Beedle? To be better citizens?"
The slap caught him on the chin, probably because even in her anger Miss Beedle realized that he still had his steel helmet on. /end quote
vimes makes mistakes. he makes mistakes all the time, and he knows this, and pays attention to them. vimes spends a lot of time thinking about thinking (engaging in productive, internally motivated metacognition well within his zone of proximal development, my master's in teaching insists i say). he thinks about his thinking, and he thinks about other people's thinking through the lens of his own.
in both instances, vimes is coming to realizations about the true nature of things.
in night watch, this would initially seem to be more surface than deep: he's getting to physical grips with exactly when and where (and who) in the past he is; he's learning the ground, mapping, figuring things out—but vimes is also trying to settle himself back in to what he knows, and what society is in these different times, to see if that fits. plotwise, in vimes's present, the seamstresses have a guild, rights, safety, standards, rules, regulations, and even societal respect—although certainly not close to what they deserve, it's much more than what they had before vetinari made their guild a reality. but in the past, where vimes is now, the seamstresses don't have this level of security, and are subject to violence (although it is shown to be societal and legal violence [being arrested for working during their profession's peak, etc] rather than interpersonal or sexual violence [the agony aunts exist and, it is clearly stated, dispense the same justice that they do in the future, specifically to individual clients rather than to larger institutional structures]).
so, when vimes puts down rosie by making a disparaging joke about her profession—oh, you're actually not important to me or to men or to society at all; your labor is not to be respected; i got what i needed from you and will of course pay you, but in the most insulting way possible—he's not only communicating what society thinks, but a moral issue of the novel as well. night watch, after all, is about revolution: who gets to be in power, and who gets to control who gets to be in power? it's frankly revolutionary for pratchett, a mainstream english author, to treat sex workers and sex work as positively as he does (of course, his depictions are not without flaws). he makes it clear that, after all, shouldn't we view sex work as physical labor? isn't it true that anyone who is employed is engaging in physical labor? how is a seamstress really different from a "seamstress"? (it's the power dynamics and misogyny standard to western/european/american/christian society: women and sex must be controlled by the patriarchial majority, kept small and afraid and in chains.) pratchett legitimizes the seamstresses in vimes's present. in vetinari's ankh-morpork, the seamstresses have just as much power as the merchants, the armorers, the assassins—and vimes knows this, but he did grow up in the past he's in now.
in snuff, vimes's approaching anagnorisis is more obviously manifested. brilliantly, pratchett begins vimes's encounter with the goblins by talking about vimes's childhood teacher, mistress slightly, who "taught [him] how not to be afraid" and made him blackboard monitor, "the first time anyone had entrusted him with anything;" vimes thinks he'll put a bag of peppermints on her grave if he gets out of this alive. all positive, and in fact clearly transformative, praise from our hero. but vimes is in a goblin cave, and pratchett has brought up mistress slightly because vimes is remembering his first (educational, not physical) encounter with goblins. this paragraph is worth quoting in full:
"[Mistress Slightly] had one book in her tiny sitting room, and the first time she had given it to young Sam Vimes to read he had got as far as page seven when he froze. The page showed a goblin: the jolly goblin, according to the text. Was it laughing, was it scowling, was it hungry, was it about to bite your head off? Young Sam Vimes hadn't waited to find out and had spent the rest of the morning under a chair. These days he excused himself by remembering that most of the other kids felt the same way. When it came to the innocence of childhood, adults often got it wrong. In any case, she had sat him on her always slightly damp knee after class and made him really look at the goblin. It was made of lots of dots! Tiny dots, if you looked closely. The closer you looked at the goblin the more it wasn't there. Stare it down and it lost all its power to frighten. 'I hear that they are wretched, badly made mortals,' the dame had said sadly. 'Half-finished folk, or so I hear. It's only a blessing this one had something to be jolly about.'"
a near-perfect depiction, unfortunately, of the educational experience. encounter something that scares you and makes you uncomfortable, examine it with the help of a pedagogist, examine it on your own, take it apart so that you are not afraid anymore, and instead understand what it is and how it is made: that's the experience from the first word of the quote all the way until "Stare it down and lost all its power to frighten." and then, a heel-turn: your teacher shows that they completely misunderstood the lesson they were teaching—and that you, the child, understood both parts of the lesson perfectly: you absorbed the critical thinking skills and that this existing societal prejudice is, in fact, totally correct and should not be examined using the skills you just learned.
thus, pratchett has vimes, our hero, our moral center, spout the violent, ingrained, dehumanizing, incitement-to-genocide nonsense of the society in which he has been formed. vimes does this tiredly, without thinking, without making the connection between how things are and how they ought to be, missing the direct relationship of that required moral reevaluation to the case and situation at hand. and pratchett throws that directly back in vimes's face, physically. both times, pratchett says: even if you're tired, even if there's shit going down, even if your worldview is being turned upside down, even if you're in the dead middle of processing everything you've so recently learned, you cannot make the mistake of dehumanization/depersonalization. and you, of all people, have to know that, vimes. not one drop of alcohol passes your lips, not one minute after six goes by without you reading to your son, not one arrestee is subjected to even small or casual police brutality. and not one person—seamstress or goblin—is to be insulted and discriminated against and excluded from deserving to live. to do so, to make that mistake even once, is to face the immediate physical consequences of it from someone deeply and fundamentally in the know. you need the sense smacked into you.
from night watch:
"Consider that a sign of my complete lack of a sense of humor, will you?" said Rosie, shaking some life back into her hand.
"I'm... sorry," said Vimes. "I didn't mean to... I mean... look, thak you for everything. I mean it. But this is not being a good night."
"Yes, I can see that."
"It's worse than you think. Believe me."
"We all have our troubles. Believe me," said Rosie. /end quote.
from snuff:
It was a corker, nonetheless, and out of the corner of his stinging gaze he saw Feeny take a step back. At least the boy had some sense.
"You are the gods' own fool, Commander Vimes! No, I'm not teaching them to be fake humans, I'm teaching them how to be goblins, clever goblins! Do you know that they have only five names for colors? Even trolls have around sixty, and a lot more than that if they find a paint salesman! Does this mean goblins are stupid? No, they have a vast number of names for things that even poets haven't come up with, for things like the colors shift and change, the melting of one hue into another. They have single words for the most complicated of feelings; I know about two hundred of them, I think, and I'm sure there are a lot more! What you may think are grunts and growls and snarls are in fact carrying vast amounts of information! They're like an iceberg, commander: most of them is where you can't see or understand, and I'm teaching Tears of the Mushroom and some of her friends so that they may be able to speak to people like you, who think they are dumb. And do you know what, commander? There isn't much time! They're being slaughtered! It's not called that, of course, but slaughter is how it ends, because they're just dumb nuisances, you see. Why don't you ask Mr. Upshot what happened to the rest of the goblins three years ago, Commander Vimes?"
And with that, Miss Beedle turned on her heel and disappeared down into the darkness of the cave with Tears of the Mushroom bobbing along behind her, leaving Vimes to walk the last few yards out into the glorious light. /end quote.
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ikebo-simp · 10 months
Note
Funniest SAGAU reverse isekai settings for them to pop into existence in:
1. Renaissance fair
2. Norway (Khaenri’ah is based off Norway so I think everyone would freak out)
3. Anime/Video game convention
4. New York City babey (or any major city) (like Enchanted but worse)
6. Haunted house
Nobody is having a good time, but it would be so funny.
I am so very sorry that it took me this long to write this, life kept throwing things at me and so I died before writing this
I haven't been to most of these places, but you are so correct, I'm mostly having them react to the places, and it's not necessarily focused on them searching for you
If it wasn't quite how you wanted, please ask again? I'll try my best
Renfaire:
Fischl, would fit perfectly in a Renfaire, overwelmed at first but slow grows to like more and more, before proudly proclaiming "I am the Prinzessin der Verurteilung" and all the people clap and bow down and respect her like a princess
What about Ayaka, joining in, changing into some of the clothes available and joining into the festivities, someplace where her responsibility don't weigh on her, somewhere the honor of her family doesn't follow her like a shadow
Both girls probably would this a blessing from 'Your Grace' a chance to relax and unwind in a place that welcomes them so warmly
Norway:
Dainsleif holds a bated breath as he looks around the place, familiar yet, unfamiliar. He torn on whether this is a gift from you or a curse, just what has he done to deserve this?
Zhongli feels his memories of the war coming back to him, flooding his thoughts, so many people... dead, why did you show him this place? Did you want to him something? Are you displeased with him?
Norway fills those who know about Khaenri'ah with a hidden dread, they misunderstand and think somethings changing, the world's getting overturned
Anime/Video Game Con
Nahida walks around the con glancing around, she understands that she's in a different world almost instantly, she's curious about the customs and world she just appeared in, does everyone try and imitate others? She does rather feel unnerved around the Dottore cosplayers
Collei immediately gets intimidated by all the loud sounds and the bumping bodies, although luckily several kind cosplayers took care of her and gently lead her away from the crowd, she honestly just very confusing and overstimulated
The con is a curious place for those who visit it and almost everyone who has trauma from Dottore wonder why there's so many Dottore clones all in one place
New York City:
Venti feels stifled, the air didn't have the same clean crispness of Teyvat, and although the sights are sounds of city are music to his ears, the air pushes on his chest like a heavy weight, making it hard for him to full enjoy his trip into the real world
Xinyan absolutely loves the city, the aesthetic, the feeling of expression, all kinds of music and styles, she wasn't getting weird stares or her style choice, she love her time in the city, her only problem? The how dirty the streets were
In New York City, it goes about as well as you'd expect, it's exciting to all the new sights, however... if it's extremely easy for one to get overstimulated
Haunted House:
Chongyun probably knocked out the first person that tried to scare him before realizing that it was just a normal person and not a evil spirit, he still gets his hopes up that he'll encounter a true ghost through
Hu Tao absolutely loves scaring the cast and guests, she'll find all the hiding spots and lay in wait for her next victim, honestly has a huge blast even though she's been transported into a different world
A/N Ahhhhh I posted it too early!!!!!!
Thanks for Reading
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katz-rambles · 3 months
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Hellooo again lovely writer ! This is a new day, so it means I have a new idea for you ;)
How about reader and one of the ghoul (your choice) being forced to shared a bed ? And now, what if reader had a spicy dream during the night and woke the ghoul sleeping next to her with her moans ? How would they react? 👀
The one-bed-trope, some forced proximity and a sprinkle of unresolved sexual tension, how could it go wrong !
Yess! I love the one bed trope smm. This may not be very good as I'm exhausted, haha. I chose Sodo/Dewdrop because this just seemed fitting for him.
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(nsfw, wet dream, fingering, PiV, squirting, cumming inside, aftercare,)
˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚˚₊‧꒰ა ☆ ໒꒱ ‧₊˚˚₊‧꒰
Sharing a room with someone, that's not too bad. You're not a stranger to sharing rooms with people, just not a room with one bed, especially not with someone you can't stop thinking about. You've read this in romance books but when it happens in real life you want to scream. This is not going as planned.
“There's only one bed,” You groan and place your bag on the floor, looking around for a couch or something that you could sleep on.
“Aww, you don't want to be close to me?” Sodo teases you, a smirk on his lips. You already know this is going to be a long night. You're tempted to pick your bag up and throw it right in his smug face.
“No,” You sigh and glare at him. You're already done with his shit and it's not even midnight yet. You stare at the bed and, for a second, you hope you can somehow mitosis the bed into creating another one. Yet it never does. Maybe you can trade rooms with someone, but everyone else is probably already asleep or trying to get to sleep so it would be pointless to try.
“Well, sweetheart, if you're not going to then I'm going to shower. No peeking,” Sodo snickers and goes into the bathroom. Maybe you will throw your bag at him. The water turning on pulls you from your thoughts, now you have to wait until he's done to get into more comfortable clothes, great.
The bed is a lot softer than you thought it would have been, for a shitty motel that is. You're laying on the bed on your stomach scrolling mindlessly on your phone when you feel the bed dip beside you. When you look over at Sodo you immediately regret it, not because he's ugly or anything, but because you're afraid you won't be able to look away, he's wearing some lose pajama bottoms and a thin shirt that basically leaves nothing to the imagination, his blonde hair is down and still damp from his shower that perfectly complements his charcoal skin. For a second you don't want to look away, trying to forever have this image in your head.
“Take a picture, sweetheart, it'll last longer,” He smirks when you realize you've been caught, he's enjoying watching you stumble over your words to find a response. “Shut up,” You snap at him, but your voice isn't harsh enough for you to actually be mad. You turn off your phone and pull the covers over yourself, the heat radiating from Sodo is enough to cook you alive so you ditch the idea and take them off almost as quick as you put them on. Thankfully, sleep comes quickly to you tonight.
“So good for me.. fuck.. so tight too,” Sodo growls into your ear and his thrusts don't stop or slow down. His face is buried in your neck and he groans when he feels you clench around him. You reach up to tug on his hair and he moans into your neck when you do. His hand goes down to rub your clit and he almost whines.
“Fuck! Sodo, please don't stop!” You cry and your back arches slightly, your hips move to try and match his unrelenting pace. You can feel the coil in your core getting tighter and tighter, and just as it's about to snap you get woken up to the feeling of being shook.
You're panting and you rub your eyes when you're fully conscious. “What?” You groan and look over at Sodo, internally hoping you didn't make any noise or you'll be done for. Your next words get caught in your throat when you fully take in his current appearance, he definitely heard you, his pupils are blown wide and he's biting his bottom lip, there's a bit of sweat on his forehead that causes some of his hair to stick to it, even through the darkness of the room you can make out the bulge in his pants.
“Sorry to wake you, but I can't help myself,” He groans and moves his face closer to yours, in a second you reach up and pull him down to kiss him. If you weren't already turned on, you are now. He grinds his erection onto your thigh and he pants into the kiss. When he breaks it you both know what to do, you grab your shirt and pull it off as he does the same, and he helps you get off your shorts and panties and he kisses you once again.
“Already.. so… wet,” He gasps between kisses and presses a finger into your folds and teases your clit. You whimper and he smirks and eagerly kisses your neck. You run your fingers through his hair and tug gently, this elicits a noise from Sodo that could make you cum on the spot. He presses a finger inside you and starts to pump them in and out, curling them up to press your sweet spot and you moan, a little too loud but neither of you care right now. He brings his head back up to your lips and kisses you again, he pulls his pants and boxers down and thrusts into you.
“Oh fuck. Does it feel as good as it did in your little dream?” He chuckles when you whine and turn your head away. “Shut up and fuck me.” You groan and he complies, his thrusts are deep and quick, yet he manages to find your sweet spot once again.
With every thrust his pelvis grinds against your clit causing you to moan.
“So fuckin’ tight..” He growls and grabs your thighs to lift them up around his waist, getting deeper than before. You can feel your orgasm approaching and from the moan he lets out so can he. Your walls tighten around him and he whines at the feeling. You can feel a gush of wetness from the noises he's making, you both already know that the rest of the band is going to kill you both from the noises you two are making but you both couldn't care less. You reach down to rub your clit and you feel the coil in your core get tighter.
“Fuck! Sodo.. please ‘m close,” You whimper through your pants and he speeds his thrusts up a bit, determined to make you cum. You wrap your legs around him and pull him closer to you and you feel a gush of wetness when you cum and he moans when you do. His thrusts don't slow as he gets closer and he cums deep inside you.
You're both panting and sweaty when he falls on top of you. “That was better than the dream,” You both laugh and he rolls off you. “Let's get cleaned up,” He picks you up and brings you to the bathroom.
Let's just say that the rest of the band will make sure you and Sodo never share a room again.
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weebsinstash · 7 months
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I didn't notice vals coat was his wings until you mentioned it, but side note, val and vox were literally frenching it in the last episode, vox literally had vals spit all over his mouth wdym they're not dating???
Oh yeah, the wing reveal was an entire thing!
In episode 4, Masquerade, Charlie decides to put her foot down and use her authority as Princess of Hell to try and visit Angel at the studio to talk to Valentino, but, um, she cannot read a room to save her life, massively fucks it up, starts a small fire (not entirely her fault, that surge protector was a mess), and Valentino actually uses his wings and his weird smoke/pheromone powers to put out the flames (so also I've thought of him rescuing Reader from fires now because of course)
I'm not sure how the logic of the coat wrapping around his arms to form sleeves works but it fucks severely. then I also think, what are alternatives for a moth Reader? Someone sent in an ask about Reader being a silk moth so that you have the moth powers but you're ultimately helpless because you either don't have wings or they're too small for you to actually fly and escape ( because domesticated silk moths were bred to not be able to fly) and I think that would be great. Maybe Reader just has a tattoo of moth wings across their back, OR you have just, magical poofing powers where you can retract that shit back in, like Anthony's second pair of arms, and when they're hidden away, you have a tattoo. It leaves potential for hiding who you are from Val. This whole mystery of him chasing down some cute moth he sees in blurry footage from your first night in the afterlife and he doesn't realize the mysterious moth with rumors of a special dust that knocks you on your ass and makes you see stars is right next to him
I just. I keep thinking of butterfly/moth Readers and different powers they can have, like a silk moth Reader who can create silk and lowkey be Spiderman (or... bondage powers? 👀) , or the pheromone powers we mentioned before, or just a Reader who has their own fuck huge wings. Most moth species have female moths be physically larger than the males and I can just see like, a luna moth Reader who's wings are big and elegant and can become an evening gown or whatever, just a moth Reader whose wings become something pretty 😍 (ughhhh callback to my "Reader becomes an incognito Overlord called Big Blue" poeer fantasy except now I'm thinking of a Reader who's tall like Val and you're a blue morpho butterfly.
Reader being in the midst of being Val's weird pet slash forced partner, waking up and Valentino is sleeping beside you and he's just got those big ass wings open and they're draped all over the bed and they're covering you like a blanket while he squeaks in his sleep... you wind up as the filling in a VoxVal sandwich and those big red bitches are huge enough to cover everybody... also... what if Valentino used his wings lowkey like a tripwire so if you try to get up out of bed, you can't move without touching the wings, and he wakes up the instant you leave the bed, I'm talking you're 5 feet away still tippy toeing and you hear "you better get the fuck back here before I have to get you" and you're instantly scrambling back to his bed and now he's wrapping his arms around you so you can't leave again
I feel like Vivienne saying Val and Vox aren't dating is.... I saw someone phrase it as "dating is a really heteronormative concept and you'll have people be in domestic partnerships who aren't married" which is a good point and i also saw someone say "you've got two men throwing nasty hissy fits and probably having the world's best hate sex afterwards, you know Valentino isn't taking this man to dinner"
I feel like staticmoth IS sort of canon but it's not, explicitly like, they would DIE for each other or anything, idk. Maybe Valentino is only truly capable of loving himself and he loves the attention Vox gives him, and Vox is toxic codependent but he truly loves Alastor, who fucking knows, I'm still over here writing them both as my favorite problematic horny queers. Now I can just see Val and Vox fighting for "custody" of their shared darling, arguing who gets them which days, stealing them from each other, sabotaging each other's dates, just being selfish nasty evil obsessive gross dudes 😩❤️
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concretevampire · 10 months
Text
Building Holes
Part One
mike schmidt x afab!reader ☆ 8.9k ☆ no use of y/n and no reader description ☆ meeting for the first time; people being humans; adult themes; no serious warnings
A/N: I’ve been a FNAF and Josh Hutcherson fan since I was in middle school so this feels necessary. updates for this story will be (mostly) regular. English is not my first language.
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You can see the panic in his eyes before he probably even thinks about it.
You don’t know him. Of course you don’t, he’s just a guy who happened to be standing in front of you at the check-out line.
But you feel bad. Really bad.
The cashier: they look disgruntled. Annoyed too. You can hardly blame them though– crying children irritate people– but you can’t help but be irked. Whoever this guy is, he’s obviously trying his best.
And what can you really do when something like this happens?
Some glittery, pink, thingamajig was right in the little girl’s line of sight and kids don’t like the word “no”. It didn’t help that he barely glanced at her when he told her off mundanely; quietly, eyes trained on the scan of item after item.
So, she’s throwing a fit. A torrential, hysterical, fit.
She can’t be older than nine, you think. And him, maybe a college student. An odd pair, but the world is filled with those. They’re so human it almost hurts; a gasp for air, a vase that’s older than you are; autumn leaves on concrete, the curve of a dandelion.
He’s processed his panic now, going pale as he spins to look between the girl and the cashier. Bag the groceries or calm her down?
The cashier looks more exasperated than anything else now. Impatience billows like drying laundry in their chest, wafting dew toward you.
A particularly pitiful sound shrieks from the girl and the thought that you want to go home enters your mind. It’s selfish, especially as you watch this guy bend down onto one knee, his thumbs wiping away the tears that muck the girl’s cheeks; muttering apologies and gentle pleas to quiet.
The fluorescent lighting of the store deepens the shadows underneath his eyes.
You decide then that your groceries aren’t really an emergency but the only thing you’ve got in the fridge is pickles and frozen pizza. You could make do but you don't want to.
“Do you want me to bag your groceries for you?” You ask, side-stepping past your cart and to The Guy, who’s precariously offering hushed solutions to the girl’s self-imposed grief.
He looks up; between you, his girl, the cashier, then the box of cereal on the counter that sits soundly.
Blue and unbothered.
Back to you. His eyes shine so brightly, you find yourself convinced he’s on the verge of tears. That’s just how he looks, you realize. Dark, dark eyes– condors and tarmac– and the twinkle of artificial light in them.
He nods weakly. “If you don’t mind.”
You shrug and walk past him, to the end of the cash register.
There’s Chef Boyardee, Donettes, Yummy Dino Buddies; they all get bagged– one by one– together. The Guy comes to stand next to you, now holding his girl; her ruddy, sobbing face tucked warmly into the crook of his neck. She’s clinging to his OMSI: Pacific Marine Camps t-shirt, snot getting on the printed Spicebush Swallowtail.
His dark eyes follow your hands as you set aside the eggs.
“Thank you,” he says, but you’re barely halfway done. He’s earnest about it though; gaze on your jaw as one of his warm palms rubs firm circles into the girl’s back.
You shake your head half-heartedly. “It’s okay,” you tell him.
“You didn’t have to do this.”
“I offered.”
He goes quiet, glancing towards the cashier a couple of times nervously. “Most people wouldn’t.”
“I dunno,” you set the eggs on top of the Donettes and whip open a new bag to place milk and Kraft Mac n’ Cheese in. “Stuff like this happens all the time.”
The little girl’s sobs have receded into hiccups and sniffles, still crying, but quiet.
The cashier picks at their nails.
When you finish bagging The Guy’s groceries, you give him a smile. Something that you hope is reassuring. Warm: the apple cider you had a week ago bubbling up on your cheeks.
Then, you return to your cart and the cashier begins scanning your items.
The Guy lingers.
A minute later he’s offering to pay for your groceries.
“You’re acting like you’re in debt,” you tease with a bewildered smile, borderline grimace.
“I am.”
“No, you’re not.”
When you exit, he follows; pushing his cart with one hand, holding the girl up with the other. She’s not crying anymore.
The pair follow as you step over a mess of expired coupons that have been trodden into a fine paste over the parking lot’s concrete. Baby wipes: two for one.
“You’ve gotta let me repay you,” he implores.
You shrug a shoulder.
He opens and closes his mouth, struggling to find the right words. And there probably aren’t any, but you can’t tell him that. That’s something he’s gotta figure out on his own. You throw the back of your car open and shove groceries in.
He watches quietly.
“Thank you,” he then says, stubbornly. Like you’re a tornado; flightless fog and feathered ozone, a nightmare, something so earnestly destructive.
He has no clue how to approach it. You.
You turn to him fully, the air turning more yellow between the two of you as the evening deepens. The sun, a molten yolk melting and dipping into the bread of the Earth’s foundation.
He’s handsome— strong arms, broad shoulders, sharp jaw— and entirely constructed by hard-headed exhaustion.
Awfully young to be taking care of a girl like that, you think, but shit happens.
Shit always happens.
You close the trunk of your car.
“Good luck,” you tell The Guy, waving softly.
He’s quiet but he begins to step away, and the girl finally looks up– still clutching onto his shirt. Her dark, dark eyes glue stickily to yours: a gooey, feathered, glittery, arts n’ crafts project.
You smile at her, something you hope is reassuring. She sniffles.
“Thanks,” he says, moving further away, “you too.”
•---------•
“Happy Birthday.” You present the manilla folder lazily to David. He raises a brow.
“Those aren’t the divorce papers, are they?”
“Um,” you bring the folder back to your chest– an evil, rectangular teddy bear– and flip it open, “‘Complaint for Divorce’ in parentheses, ‘No Children’,” you look back at him. “I dunno, could be.”
He groans and reorganizes the staplers on his desk that have already been neatly placed at the corner. Twenty-degree angles on top of ninety-degree angles. All aligned in minimalist, careful, simplicity.
Perfect.
“I’m glad someone’s getting some amusement out of my divorce,” David groans, flipping drawers open and closed. Looking for something imaginary, something that will keep him busy. An object that will be an excuse in the future for his own failures.
“Our divorce,” you plea sarcastically, “You’re not gonna be my brother-in-law any more.” As if it ever mattered.
“Why are you here anyway?” He asks, finally straightening. One of his thick brows raises. “And not her assistant?”
“She wanted the personal touch.” You joke, setting the folder down on his desk. It feels incriminating when you hold it yourself as if you’re the one holding the gun up to their marriage, pulling the trigger. David eyes the folder warily. He reaches a skinny hand out, flipping through the papers tentatively.
His tendons swing and swell like frantic waves under his tan skin.
“I guess one nice thing about marrying a lawyer is that paperwork’s never a problem,” he mutters.
“And there are copies.”
“Oh, joy!” He exclaims, but then slumps in his chair, temples balanced in his palms. He’s awfully small like this. Crumpled at his desk. His blue and green argyle tie, a ruined knot at his neck. Gray suit, a poor stitch of used paper towels surrounding his frame.
Something about seeing a man so weak feels sacrilegous. Feels like a taunt. Feels like God is sitting on your shoulder and giggling.
It doesn’t help that his desk is so pristine. Neat where David is fucked. A nameplate sits perfectly in the center: DAVID CASTILLO VICE PRINCIPAL, it screams, confident.
“I should go,” you say when he doesn’t twitch from his hunched position for sixty seconds.
He nods, then shakes his head, then pinches the bridge of his nose as if a spider’s unfurled its legs in the cave of it. “No,” he starts, “No, um,” he glances at the divorce papers and looks away just as quickly. There’s a picture of him and your sister hanging on the wall to his left. He stares at the frame. “How about I take you out to dinner? Or something?”
“Sure,” you shrug.
“Okay.” David inhales deeply.
It’s quiet. A clock on his wall ticks, again and again, impending itself into your skin and his soul. “Do you want me to wait outside?” You ask, pointing a thumb at the door.
“Please,” he mutters.
The school is empty. The ‘Welcome Back to School!’ display is still up in the lobby, even though it’s mid-September and a chill is starting to ghost the air every few days. A janitor scoops up a leaking trash bag, throws it over his shoulder, and rolls the bin into the hallway.
You stroll past a wall absolutely littered with papers; drawings hung up like samara fruit in waxy colors. Lots of suns with smiley faces and brown, pea-bodied dogs. Theres a family of rainbow turtles and a wonky drawing of Ariel from The Little Mermaid. You recognize a dragon and a field of camels too. It’s endearing.
David wanted kids. Your sister didn’t.
That’s not the reason they’re getting a divorce but it’s one of those little microcosms that sums up why.
One little minute passed but it changed the hour. Changed the day too, maybe. Or the week. The month. For all you know, even the year. That’s what happened with them.
Just one minute. That’s all it takes.
You expect the cafeteria to be empty like everything else but it isn’t. There’s a woman sitting near the entrance with barrel hips and kinky, salt-and-pepper hair that's clipped back viciously in a bun. She smells warm, like peaches and laundry detergent; shea butter too.
A spice you only dream about.
The woman looks up at you from her book– something by Toni Morrison– and her brown and pink lips purse at you.
For a second she looks mean, but her hands seem so soft; so, so soft; the color of warm, brown egg shells. Her nails are lacquered in a hazy shade of lavender that reminds you of glow-in-the-dark stars on the ceiling and the taste of milk with honey.
Sweet potato pie.
“Are you here for Abby Schmidt?” She asks, her voice low and smooth like the afterthought of a lullaby. Her eyes then turn to a girl sitting at one of the cafeteria tables. She sits alone, her dark hair hanging in rivulets around her ears and jaw, and she scribbles mindlessly with crayons on paper.
“No,” you tell her, adjusting your messenger bag a little. “I was just dropping something off for Mr. Castillo.”
The woman closes her book. Her eyebrows are thin. Neat stitches arched above wrinkles. “Are you a friend of David’s?”
“Yeah, something like that.”
“Okay,” she relents and opens her book again. You smile fractionally and nod, even though she doesn’t see.
Your footsteps echo against the linoleum as you walk deeper into the heart of the cafeteria. The girl doesn’t look up from her work, even as you approach, and you find yourself standing behind her. You’re looking over her shoulder at her art, arms clasped behind your back.
“I like your drawing,” you utter. The girl— Abby— turns to look up at you. Her eyes stick to yours.
“Thank you,” she says, trading a green crayon for a pink one. Then she looks back up, assessing you like you’re a division problem she hasn’t quite learned yet. “I like your jacket.” She settles.
“Thanks,” you say genuinely, shifting on your feet, “Can I sit with you?”
Abby nods and scoots over as you join her. She keeps coloring. Your eyes scan her drawing some more.
Two scribbled figures. Both with dark hair, and dark eyes, and smiles. One is taller than the other, and you can tell that the shorter one is herself: she’s wearing the red overalls in her drawing. The taller figure sports a green sweater— deep green.
Evergreens, ferns; huckleberries falling off the branch.
“Is that your dad?” You ask, hand waving towards the taller figure. She shakes her head.
“That’s Mike. He’s my brother.”
You nod. “Is that who you’re waiting for?”
“Mhm. But he’ll be here soon.” She checks the little purple watch on her wrist like she’s the president of the United States. “He’s usually late.” She turns to you. “Are you waiting for someone too?”
You guess you are. “Yeah.”
“Are they late?”
You shrug. “Sorta.”
Abby then narrows her eyes at your face. “I know you,” she says resolutely.
“Do you?” You ask, propping your head up with a palm as you rest your elbow on the cafeteria table.
“Yeah. You’re that lady who helped Mike at the grocery store.”
Your brows twitch upward, an interested leer wide on your lips. Abby looks suddenly familiar. Dark, dark eyes and fluorescents catching on them.
You’re surprised she remembers that at all; not only because it happened back during the tail-end of July, but because she was sobbing through the whole situation. She only saw your face for a solid five seconds and still recognized you as That Lady.
Smart girl.
“Yeah, that was me.”
She assesses you again; but more like a bird on a tree. “I’m Abby.”
“Nice to meet you, Abby.” You introduce yourself too. She beams and turns back to coloring. You watch and then ask, “Can I draw with you?” and Abby is quick to shove a paper and brown crayon in your hand.
She seems very pleased about the development.
Ten minutes later she’s frowning at your purple cow-dog-unicorn-thing and shaking her head. “I don’t think it looks like a cow.”
You look down at your work with her.
“Maybe if you squint? It’s abstract.” You narrow your eyes and bite the flesh of your cheek, doing what you think the high masters did when they made shit too.
She tries a squint and then frowns harder. “No.”
You laugh. “Well, maybe it’s my own animal.”
“Does it have a name?”
“Hmm. Wanna help me think of one?”
“Umm,” Abby tilts her head this way and that, the curls of her hair springing as she does. “I can’t think of anything.”
Before you can reply with something funny, someone runs into the cafeteria, panting. It’s The Guy. Mike. Her brother.
“I’m sorry, Mrs. Harris, I-“
The woman ignores him, flipping another page in her book. He sighs and swallows, turning towards Abby. Then he looks flatly at you.
Abby stares– unwavering– as he walks over, hands crossed neatly over one another on the table. Mike takes her scrutiny like it’s orange juice with pulp while glancing strangely between her face and yours.
“Mike,” she starts. “You’re late.”
“Yeah, I know, um,” he looks vaguely towards you. This feels like a routine and it feels like you're breaking it.
Abby introduces you. “This is the nice lady from the grocery store.” She supplies. His eyes widen momentarily, suddenly putting all the pieces of the past and the present together, a jigsaw falling into place. His eyes trace the slant of your nose, the curve of your eyes; linger on the pocket above your lips and the eve of your jaw.
Mike clears his throat and straightens his back. “I didn’t know you worked here?”
“I don’t,” you say, and look at your purple abomination. “A family member does.”
Mike nods and momentarily loses interest, walking around the table and grabbing Abby’s backpack. He slings it across his shoulder. It’s phenomenally tiny on his sback and you realize just how small Abby is. And the little pack is so bright against him too; shining in reds, and yellows, and deep blue cerulean against the gray-green of his jacket.
Abby stands, gathers her drawings (yours too), and grabs Mike’s hand when he offers it. There are bandaids on his thumb and pointer finger, bruises like nightshade crawling from underneath the torn brown.
But Abby doesn’t look away from you when Mike makes it for the exit. She makes an annoyed, high-pitched sound from the back of her throat and glues her eyes to yours desperately.
He stops, head knocking back to stare at the ceiling tiredly, before dropping to look at her. “What’s wrong?” He asks her gently.
“Wanna go to Sparky’s with us?” Abby asks you, with no regard towards Mike. Like he’s an imaginary presence. His eyes go wide though, catching the light like moths as he stares tight-lipped and in utter horror at the back of Abby’s head.
And then he comes to terms with it, frowning between you and her.
“Um,” you start, then scoot closer to Abby in your seat. Your eyes level with hers. “I think that’s something you need to ask Mike about,” you settle gently, hoping its the right thing to say.
She whips her head to look up at him. “Can they go to Sparky’s with us?”
Mike clears his throat; shifts his stance like it’ll suddenly root the words into his mind; adjusts the strap of Abby’s bag on his shoulder.
“Maybe later,” he decides.
“When?”
“Abby. C’mon.”
“When, Mike?”
You rise from your seat. “Are you free Friday?” You ask him, head tilting. He purses his lips at you, jaw working, and then seemingly gives up.
“After four, yeah.”
“Great. Me too.”
“Okay.”
“Friday at five then?” You beam down at Abby. “Sparky’s right?” Back at Mike. “That’s on 65th and Jefferson?”
“Yeah. Sure, sounds good.” He says, but you don’t believe him. He’s got this barely-there wince on his face like there’s a nail in his shoe.
He’s sorry, you realize. Sorry about Abby; sorry that he’s supposedly forced you into this. You shake your head at him with an easy smile.
It’s okay. But he doesn’t believe you either.
You feel like he’s the type of person who’s always on his own page. Not because he wants to be but because he’s worried that other people can’t read between the lines. Can’t look deeper, past the words and into the real meat of it all.
Or maybe Mike’s more comfortable ripping the book apart than letting anybody settle down into it with him.
He leaves.
Abby waves at you, a flutter of little fingers as she walks out the door too, trailing behind Mike.
David shows up five minutes later.
His tie is situated perfectly around his neck; firm and rigid into the confines of his freshly buttoned suit. He smiles at Mrs. Harris and she asks him how he is. David says he’s fine. You wish he didn’t have to lie but he waves you over like his life is a dream and you accept that this is the reality he wants. And that you’re, in some way, a part of it.
Dinner with him is a blur. The week is a blur.
On Friday, you almost forget that you’ve committed to go to Sparky’s but one of your coworkers mentions how her daughter has a ballet recital; and you’re suddenly reminded of Abby.
Reminded of the fact that there’s now apparently a child in your life that is affected by your actions.
You think for a moment to talk about Abby but remember suddenly that you don’t really know a thing about her. You don’t know whether she prefers apple juice or orange juice: what her favorite cartoon is: or if she’s still using kid’s toothpaste.
Abby’s not your kid or your little sister, and that fact doesn’t change even if you think she’s cute and funny.
You wonder what she’s drawn today.
Maybe she’ll show you. You think about how small she is and if her little eyes will stare into yours, hop-scotching across the strange adult sadness you can’t seem to shake off on warm, overcast days like today.
You drown out thoughts with the radio while you drive to Sparky’s.
It’s a hard place to miss.
It’s just outside the center of town, and the flat-topped building sits under a large neon sign that says “SPAKY’S GIL & DINR” because the owner can’t really afford to fix the letters that don’t light up anymore. The smiling, cartoon dog– Sparky— doesn’t light up anymore either.
He’s got bird shit on his left eye.
You’re five minutes early when you open the glass door to the diner. A bell tinkles, signaling your arrival.
Mike and Abby have already situated themselves in one of the gray laminate booths. They sit on one side together. Abby’s got her head down, already scribbling at a paper with a green, broken crayon. Mike’s looking out the window, an arm across the back of the booth behind her. Calm, reserved.
A little, yellow teddy bear is propped up between them.
Mike only turns your way when you sit down across from him. Abby looks up from her drawing immediately, her head jolting up. Her grin is palpable, like strawberry shortcake, when you say hi.
“You came!” She exclaims, grip tightening on the crayon. It might snap.
You smile. “Of course I did. I said I would, didn’t I?”
Abby nods and returns to drawing; her arm moving twice as fast as it was before you came.
Mike makes eye contact with you. His eyes then drop to linger on the collar of your shirt, reading the hem like an instruction manual, before raising again.
You’re not sure what he learned from the stitching.
Something by The Doors is droning on the speaker; fuzzy, blurry, like fog. Jim Morrison moans out “Let it roll, baby, roll~” and your foot taps along.
“Did you just get back from work?” You ask him, shrugging your jacket off.
“Yep.”
“What do you do?”
“Construction.” Something you could’ve guessed, judging by the Carhartt pants and steel-toed boots.
“Nice,” you say, authentically.
He nods, then says, “How about you?” like the words are gumming to his teeth.
“Boring stuff,” you wave Mike off and watch Abby trade for a blue crayon. She’s humming along to the music. You can feel his eyes on the side of your face and turn your head back to sit eye-to-eye. He raises a quizzical brow. “Seriously,” you implore.
“You don’t have a job,” He says simply. He’s not really bothered by the notion that you’re unemployed.
“I do,” you huff, “I just,” so you tell him about it. He looks tired while you talk, occasionally eyeing the ketchup and continuously rereading the label while actively pretending not to. But he’s an honest, good sport about it; at the very least trying to seem interested. Mike nods in all the right places, giving “yeahs” and “mhms” when he should.
In the middle of your drone, the waitress comes.
She’s fifty-something, with chalky eyeliner bleeding under her eyes; her ginger-dyed hair is pulled back in an impressively messy beehive. You easily imagine royal honey dripping from the split ends. She smells like stevia and tobacco. The name tag on her chest says “Susie”.
Susie blinks at you warmly and tiredly. “What can I get for you?”
Mike orders first, orders for Abby– who barely flinches at the mention of her name– and then you order.
Susie leaves without writing any of it down.
Mike turns back to you, tense. “You don’t mind paying for yourself, right?”
“Wouldn’t have it any other way,” you joke, but he doesn’t really smile. Abby suddenly looks up from her art and leans in your direction, a little valence electron swarming into a new orbital. Her small shoulder pushes into Mike’s bicep. He stills her with a soft look like he wants to pillow her in peach fuzz and call it a night.
“Do you like your job?” She asks, sitting up on her knees. The hand Mike has resting on the booth moves to fix her sweater to her shoulder. She doesn’t even flinch.
You shrug a little. “It’s okay.”
She seems troubled. “Why do grown-ups never like their jobs?”
You stifle a laugh but shake your head. “I’m not sure about that. There are a lot of grown-ups who like their jobs.”
“I don’t know any.”
You glance at Mike.
He’s wincing at her words– scratching at the skin behind his ear– looking properly embarrassed. They’re a funny pair; like pickle relish and peanut butter. Weird fishes swimming and circling together because they have nowhere else to go. They know this routine; know the angle of each other’s currents.
“There are,” you assure her. Your eyes drift toward the drawing she abandoned. “What do you wanna be when you’re grown-up?”
She shrugs and tells you “I dunno,” like it’s the easiest answer in the world. “This boy, Jesse, in my class, he wants to be an astronaut.”
“Do you want to be an astronaut?”
“Sure. Space is cool. And the moon is pretty.” Abby looks towards the ceiling as if it’ll break apart and reveal Mars.
Your fingers reach tentatively for her art and when she doesn’t protest, you take it fully. You hold her work up with two hands in front of your face like a mask. “You don’t wanna be an artist?” You ask with a sly smile, peeking around the drawing. She shrugs again and Mike rubs her back a little.
You face the paper.
It’s a grassy scene; blue sky, yellow sun wearing sunglasses. Five figures are the subject; Abby in the middle and then two other children on each side of her. On her left; a redhead boy with a hook for a hand and another boy in a top hat. On her right; a blonde girl in a pink dress and finally, a boy in blue with bunny ears.
You put down the paper to look at Abby. Her eyes are wide, expectant. Mike’s are the same.
“Are these your friends?”
“Yes!” Abby exclaims and leans on the table to look at you closer. “How did you know?”
“Lucky guess,” you grin, pleased.
Mike shifts awkwardly. “Imaginary,” he clarifies. “Imaginary friends.”
You give him a private, amused smile. He relaxes a little.
Abby hands you a blank paper. “You should draw your friends.”
You obey, picking up a crayon, starting with yourself. Mike watches you carefully, eyes on your hands, sometimes trailing the curve of your eyebrows and the fall of your lashes.
“You’re good,” he says as Abby hands you a pink crayon– which you take dutifully. You draw a flower while sending him a wry smile, shaking your head. “I’m serious,” he implores, but you can hear the joke behind it.
“Sure.”
Then you finish coloring your jeans in and lean back to think.
Friends. You could draw your sister. But she’s not a friend. She’s your sister, and a lawyer, and a now ex-wife, but she’s not a friend.
David isn’t a friend either.
Dinner with him was quiet and he’d broke down into tears (again) by the end of it. You paid for the bill out of pity. You think that’s probably the last time you’re ever going to see him.
The waitress drops your food off as you start to outline the shape of red overalls.
Abby chews deftly on her chicken nuggets and leans into Mike’s shoulder while he dips his burger into a heaping pool of ketchup: the two of them eye your drawing together. You’re reminded of this photo you saw once in a Nat Geo magazine of two dark-eyed owls burrowed together.
You bite a smile.
When you’re done coloring a green sweater, you straighten and pop a self-satisfied fry into your mouth.
Abby wipes her hands off with a napkin that Mike hands her and takes your drawing. She gasps when she sees. Mike’s brows raise and you reflexively hope he doesn’t hate it.
“It’s us!” Abby says excitedly, vibrating with joy. You take a bite of your food and nod. She turns to Mike, huffing, and very seriously tells, “This is for the fridge.”
And finally, Mike smiles, almost snorting. But all he does is nod and say “Sure is,” between his bite
“You even drew my overalls.”
“I did,” you say. “They’re totally cute.”
“I like the flowers you drew around us.”
“Pretty, right?”
Abby looks so happy you could scream.
By the time both Mike and you are done with your food, her eyes haven’t left the drawing. And you must be doing something right because at some point Mike smiles at you.
Quietly. Mostly unseen.
Mike is comfortably out of your reach but he flutters in and out of your grasp fleetingly; a moth seeking light, heat, maybe something more. When he lands, you don’t close your fingers; only hang your palm open and let him decide if he wants to stay.
Maybe you are on the same page but you’re not sure if he knows it.
When the check comes Mike suddenly offers to pay. You refuse, waving him off and sticking your card in with his.
Susie comes to pick it up and then returns five seconds later, wishing you a nice day. You walk out of the diner as one big group– Mike holding the door open for you and Abby– and you find yourselves stuck under neon signs.
Mike looks at Abby carefully. “Can you wait in the car for a second?” He asks. She looks immediately offended, wanting to say no.
He looks exhausted.
Abby glares at him, then looks sadly at you before walking away and clambering into the back seat of his Honda Accord.
You turn to Mike and he turns to you when the door slams shut.
“Thank you,” he says immediately like he’s been holding it in his lungs the entire time.
“It’s nothing.”
“No,” he urges, “seriously. Abby, she,” he glances at the car, “she has a really hard time with people. Shit, I have a hard time with her too and I’m her brother.” Mike takes a deep breath. “She really likes you.”
You’re quiet for a second, letting the shadow in your eyes escape and mingle with his. “I get it.” You tell him. “Kids are…” you scuff your shoe against the pavement, “hard. Big emotions, little bodies, ya know?”
He nods. “Yeah.” He exhales. “You’re good with her.”
“I was a weird kid too.” You tell Mike with a grin.
Something like a smile is offered as he shakes his head. “You, uh,” he stuffs his hands in the pockets of his jeans and glues his eyes to the ground. “You wouldn’t mind meeting up again?”
You take a deep breath. This is a lot.
You should say, “Yes, I do mind,” but honestly, you really don’t. You’re not bothered by their company. You like both of them. Mike’s got something sad about him though; constantly in the eye of a storm, waiting for the hazard to hit again. And Abby’s Abby: sweet.
“It’s just, she doesn’t really,, click. But she did with you. And I know she’s gonna wanna see you again.” He elaborates.
“Sure,” you breathe, blinking. “Do you want my phone number or something?”
Mike nods. “Yeah, that’d be good.” He gives you his phone and sniffs when you enter your digits and hand it back.
You step away, steeping yourself deeper into the night. “See you around?”
“Yeah,” he nods and turns to his car. Abby rolls the window down, thin arms circling quickly, and peaks her head out.
“Bye!” She calls desperately as the engine starts. She probably thinks she’ll never see you again.
“Later, alligator!” You call back, waving.
She grins toothily and Mike asks her to roll the window up as they pull slowly out of the parking lot.
•---------•
Mike doesn’t contact you for the next two weeks. You expect it.
By the third week, you’ve settled that he’s realized just how odd this situation is and won’t call you ever. Something like disappointment aches awfully in your chest but you brush it off as a human reaction to the departure of warm summer evenings.
October is right around the corner and you’re starting to feel it.
The days are getting crisper; dirt turning to mud, dew on the grass, leaves turning orange. There’s also a bug going around at work and you’re not spared of its spread.
You wake up one morning with a scratch in your throat, an ache in your head, and a clog in your left nostril. You’re not really that sick; after a cup of coffee, you feel better. But your psyche still feels like it’s made from popsicle sticks and cotton balls.
You take it to the pharmacy before work.
There’s Nyquil and a row of untouched Dayquil next to it. Concentrated Tylenol and Cepacol. Zyrtec and Claritin. Dimetapp. You take the Aspirin and Nyquil and shlump towards the counter.
Mike is there, looking casually fatigued in front of the check-out counter, his hands in his pockets.
“Hey,” you say, the inflection of a question in your voice; the hesitance that maybe Mike wants to be ignored. Remain unseen. Unperceived. He jolts a little at your greeting and doesn’t relax when he turns to face you.
“Hey,” he says back. He takes a glance at your hand. “Sick?”
“Just a runny nose.”
He nods, takes a nervous look towards the empty counter, and then scratches at the growing stubble on his jaw.
“How ‘bout you?” You ask.
His eyes won’t meet yours. “Just some medication.”
You nod and look slowly toward the rack of non-prescription reading glasses. There’s a glittery, red pair at the very top– so small they could probably fit in the palm of your hand. “How’s Abby?”
Mike relents a little, shoulders going from concrete to rubble. “She’s doing alright. She asks about you sometimes.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. I mean, that drawing you did? She loves it.”
“I’m glad.”
There’s a quiet spell– the two of you looking in your own directions– and when the pharmacist finally shows up, paper bag in hand, Mike nabs it and leaves.
Then you step forward to pay, a polite smile on your lips, eyes flicking to your watch to take a mental note that you need to get to work soon.
Mike’s waiting for you outside the pharmacy; awkward and dark against the white overcast. It’s foggy this morning. You don’t know how he isn’t cold, only wearing a pair of jeans and a Foo-Fighters t-shirt that’s a little tight around the arms and chest. That makes you swallow.
You slow to a stop in front of him.
“I was gonna call you,” he sighs. “I got busy.”
“It’s okay.”
“Do you wanna,” he raises a hand, then drops it uselessly, “do something with Abby soon?”
“Sure.”
“She’s got a half-day on Wednesday. We could take her to the park?”
It’s a good plan. You don’t know why he sounds so unsure. “Get her outside before it gets too cold to?”
“Yeah,” he says, breathing a little easier.
“Sure, I’d love to.”
Mike straightens his back a degree. “You know Marylheights Park? It’s close to the school.”
“Yeah, I know it.”
“Is one okay? Or are you working?” He suddenly realizes.
You shake your head. “I can come by on my lunch break.”
“Alright. Great. See you there.”
You smile, nod, step away a little, and then leave– abandoning Mike under the eave of the pharmacy.
True to your word, you show up at one o’clock in the afternoon at Marylheights Park. Mike and Abby are already there– he’s sitting on a bench, wearing a flimsy black hoodie and she’s bundled up in a pink and red jacket, a beanie knitted in a cacophony of colors on her head.
She runs over when she sees you, a heap of colors on the breeze, a smile bright on her face.
“I haven’t seen you in forever!” She exclaims, tripping a little on the bark-chip. You see Mike twitch and then falter when she catches herself.
“You okay?” You ask, reaching a hand out for support if she needs it. She grabs your fingers, tight, as she leads you toward the playground. There’s a couple of other kids with their parents playing too.
“Do you like my hat?” She asks, stopping in front of you to show off.
“I love it.”
“Mike made it for me.”
You glance at him. He’s slouched lazily on the bench, hands stuffed in the pocket of his hoodie.
“Really?”
“Mhm.” She dawdles around you, skipping and humming as she climbs the monkey bars. “I saw a turtle today.”
“That’s cool.”
“Yeah, it was really cute.” She hangs off one of the bars, letting herself swing back and forth. “Lauren brought it for show-and-tell today.”
“What did you bring for show-and-tell?” You ask, leaning against a post with your arms crossed.
“My friend.”
“Your friend?”
“He’s in my backpack right now.”
You nod like it makes perfect sense. “When I did show-and-tell I brought my big sister.” It’s not true but it's funny to think about.
Abby looks at you wide-eyed and a flock of Canadian Geese honk above you; black and white, obnoxious angels. “You can do that?”
“Duh.”
Abby drops from the bar and stares at you. “You’re lying to me.”
You grin. “Maybeeee.”
She rolls her eyes the same way that people do it on TV and suddenly walks away when she sees a round of Lava Monster is starting up. It’s a weird, convoluted game you used to play all the time. You’re suddenly upset that you forgot the rules; as if it didn’t used to be one of your favorite things in the whole world.
You sigh and meander over to Mike, sitting next to him.
Your eyes stay on Abby as she toddles along the play-structure in the middle, unsteadier than you like. Mike hands you a brown, paper bag wordlessly. You raise a brow and take it.
Inside is a white-bread sandwich in a ziploc bag, a juice box, and a folded note.
“What-”
Mike cuts you off. “You came on your lunch break.” You raise your head to look him in the eye. He’s so hard to read sometimes. ”Hope you like turkey and cheese.”
You beam, flushing between joy and embarrassment, and grab the juice box. There’s a cool guy surfing on it. “Thanks,” you say, stabbing the straw into the top. “You didn’t have to.”
He shrugs and turns to watch Abby. She clambers across the slides to avoid being tagged. Some of the other kids yelp and scream wordlessly.
“I owed it to you,” he breathes, his words turning to a puff of vapor in front of his nose.
The two of you split the sandwich in half and you don’t miss the way Mike watches you pick at the crust. When you eat it anyway you hear him puff a sharp exhale of laughter through his nose, shaking his head.
The game filters out and Abby makes her way to the swings, shoes toeing the ground as she sits.
Your fingers lift the note from the bag when you finish eating— unfolding to find a small, crayon drawing, no bigger than your hand.
A purple cow, better than yours, and actually tangible as a cow. Impressive.
“Abby did that,” Mike says, chewing. “She said you need it.”
You close your eyes, amused and overjoyed. Your fingers fold the little piece of paper back up and place it carefully in your bag, in a place you know it won’t be ruined. “God, she’s so sweet,” you huff, hand clenching. You’re not sure what to do with yourself.
You feel like husked corn; chipping paint in a parking lot. Like the curl of peeled apple skin.
“She has her moments,” Mike says gently, almost smiling.
Abby starts spinning herself on the swing, twisting and knotting the chains together and then letting them unravel to leave her in spirals. He frowns at that.
“Abby,” he calls, fixing his slouch on the bench, “quit it! You’ll make yourself sick!”
She sticks her tongue out at him. He grunts. She grins at you and waves. You wave back. She goes back to swinging normally; progressively higher and higher. Another kid ambles over to join her wordlessly.
Mike frowns and shakes his head, first at Abby, then at you. “I’m starting to think she likes you more than me.”
You snort at him. “I’m an adult who isn’t an authority figure in her life.”
“Still.”
“She adores you.” You tell him. You don’t really know either of them well enough to say that but you’re sure of it. You’re sure of it not only because you said it but because Abby’s a sweet, smart kid. She’s got her problems but she’s generally well-behaved. More importantly, she seems happy.
Unbothered, by whatever situation she and Mike are in. Whatever he’s doing, he’s doing pretty good.
And maybe she doesn’t look at Mike like he hung the stars but she certainly treats him like it. The thing about kids is that they’re brutally honest:
If she didn't like Mike, you’d know.
He stares at you for a second longer than you’d expect him to and turns back to watch her.
The two of you stay like that for a while. Side by side. Almost shoulder to shoulder. Abby sometimes comes over to take a break, or ask what you thought of her drawing, or tell Mike what she wants for dinner. It’s peaceful. Quiet.
Okay.
Some parents leave. Some new parents show up. The two of you stay.
At some point, you glance down at your watch and panic floods your synapses.
“Shit,” you mutter, standing up. Mike raises a brow. “I’m really sorry but I’ve gotta get back now. I’m gonna be late and-“
“Don’t worry.” He tells you easily, fixing his posture so he isn’t slouched under your eye. You smile apologetically. Abby runs over from the slides, panting, her wide eyes expectant on yours.
“You’re leaving?”
“Yeah, I have to get to work now.”
“But you’ll come back right?”
You bend down to her level, fix the hat on her head so that it sits evenly. “Yeah, of course.”
“Okay.” She sighs, seemingly relieved, but the trace shadows of upset are still visible in the gleam of her eyes.
“Have fun with Mike?” You tell her, rising. You linger despite yourself.
“Later alligator?” She asks like a wet mutt as you start the walk to your car.
“In a while crocodile.”
You wave and she waves back. Mike keeps his eyes trained on you, raising a hand too. Your smile widens.
•---------•
Your older sister is the prettier, smarter, more put-together version of you. The version of you that you pretend to be.
She doesn’t laugh and she doesn’t smile, and you can’t tell if it’s because she genuinely can’t feel joy or is afraid of getting wrinkles. You’re sure it’s a mix of both. She lives in this big, minimalist penthouse suite that you’ve only been in twice; her heels have red bottoms. She has avocado toast for most her meals and the hoops on her ears are real gold.
In short summary; your sister has got it good. You’re pretty sure she’s miserable.
She tells her assistant, Christa, to get her a coffee and Chrsita offers to get you one too with a sweet smile. You want to say “Yes,” but she looks awfully close to having a mental breakdown. You tell Christa, “No, thanks,” smiling gently back.
When she leaves, you turn and stare at your sister’s pursed lips.
You drove into the city for once and your sister could only make time for you to come and sit in one of the stiff chairs she has placed in front of her cocobolo desk; the chairs for clients. You look around her office.
It’s neater than David’s and ten times bigger.
Vast and white. A tundra of dreams scotch-taped together.
“You were almost late.” She says, annoyed, eyes stuck to the papers in front of her.
“Sorry, I had to get cough drops at the pharmacy.”
“You’re sick?”
“Just a sore throat.”
You lean forward to poke her cheek. She squawks and slaps your hand away, scandalized and disgusted.
“That’s disgusting!”
You laugh and she steels you with a hard glare, a scoff caught in the back of her throat. “I do wash my hands,” you tell her.
She shakes her head and drums her perfectly manicured French tips against the heavy table. You tuck your own hands under your thighs. You like her nails; you want yours to look like hers but they’re inconvenient for people like you. Real people, with real lives and realistic, boring jobs.
But it's nice to look at them, especially on your sister.
“Heard from David?” She asks as if she isn’t divorcing him. Like he’s a houseplant that you’re taking care of while she takes a quick business trip.
New York. London. Shanghai. Amsterdam. Seoul. You’ve seen the photos.
“Nope.” You bite your lip and Christa comes with the coffee. A cappuccino that she places in front of your sister. Black. Tiny, little cup. Christa gives you a dazzling smile that has you grinning back at her fully, like an indulged schoolgirl. And then she’s gone; clicking off to document review in her little black heels.
Your sister glares at that.
You look her over.
Look at the way she’s curled her lashes and glossed her lips. Her shirt is buttoned straight– stiff and crisp around her neck. There’s a little permanent divot between her eyebrows and the white light of the office washes her out.
“You look tired,” you say flatly, a fairly normal thing to say to a woman who’s a criminal lawyer for an inner-city law firm.
She barely looks at you. “Thanks.”
And then it’s her turn to look you over. You’re sure she doesn’t like what she sees. She rarely does. “Have you been eating?”
“Of course I have.”
She stares for a moment longer before saying, “Just checking.”
Someone knocks on the door and peaks their head in– a young man with dark hair. Bright hazel eyes. She glares at him wordlessly and he makes eye contact with you before shutting the door quickly. You watch her scoff and then carefully pick up a pen before signing the papers gently; like hemlock and hummingbirds.
Your sister. Elegant.
You tilt your head.
She starts. “So, any luck-“
“Oh, can we please go five minutes-“
“I was going to ask-“
“-without talking about-“
“-about your job!”
“-things I know you don’t care about!” You stare at her. “I don’t want to talk about it.”
“Fine. We won’t talk about it.
You smile. “I like your shirt.”
“Fuck off.�� She flips open a stack of papers with a fit of impressive anger, scribbling something hotly in the margins.
You know she doesn’t hate you but sometimes you have to wonder.
She’s mean and a bitch; but she constantly worries— and she worries more about you than anyone else. More than she ever worried about David. Which says quite a bit about what the two of you have done and put up with for one another.
Your sister: less of a counterpart, more of a weird black shadow of a half-twin. Not the moon and the sun; but a tree and the ferns that grow underneath.
Your sister stares at her cooling cup of coffee and looks into your eyes like they’re blurry. “Do you need money?”
Her solution to everything. A pretty good one, you won’t lie. “No.” You say quickly, waving her off.
“So everything’s good then?”
“Yeah. Good. It’s all good.”
She raises a brow but looks away to read something.
“How about you?” You ask.
She sighs heavily and stares at the wall. “Well,” and for a moment she doesn’t look like your sister. More like any other woman– any other person experiencing life for the first time. She’s thinking about her job and her home; the wonders and horrors of burnt toast and manilla folders. Of sending people to jail or keeping them out of it. Of going to bed in her 1200 thread count, Egyptian-cotton bed set.
Then she blinks, as if remembering who she is, and suddenly your sister’s sitting in front of you again.
“It’s alright. Fine. Boring.”
“Makes sense.” You tell her with a nod.
“How’s Mac?” She asks off-handedly, eyes on her work. Mac. Full name Tarmac. The stray cat that’s been haunting your house for the past couple of years. A dumb, skinny little cat who loved you with all of his heart.
“Dead.”
“What?” Your sister exclaims, wrist dropping to the edge of the table, pen still in hand. “How are you not,, a wreck?”
“It happened a few months ago.”
“God.” She finally takes a sip of her cappuccino and clears her throat. “Well, just don’t get upset one night and, I dunno, drink yourself into a sobbing mess.”
You grimace. “Says you.”
She sends you a hard glare. “Don’t.”
“I’m not the one who had to be bailed out of-“
“When are you going to stop bringing that up?” She groans. You laugh a bit now, dropping your head towards your lap and your sister looks properly embarrassed. “I passed the bar, have a Porsche, and have a personal trainer, ya know!”
You laugh harder. You can tell she finds it almost funny too but is raging too hotly to care.
“And then I had to-“
“Stop!” She exclaims.
You leave her alone but still giggle through it, fingers pressing against your lips in a complete failure to contain your amusement.
There’s another beat of silence.
She takes another sip. You watch her. Christa comes by again with a new, impressively thick stack of papers for your sister and walks out.
“Where’s your shirt from?” You ask your sister, eyeing it. “It’s nice.”
“Balenciaga.”
Pricey. The white, simple, button-up shirt she’s wearing probably cost her more than a hundred dollars.
“Is it cotton?” You ask her, leaning forward for a better look.
“Yes.” She side-eyes you warily. You lean back. “You better not steal it.”
“I’m not going to!”
“You’ve done it before.”
You roll your eyes.
Your sister finishes her coffee off in silence. It’s awfully quiet for a law firm. You wonder if her office walls are sound-proofed.
At some point, she tells you she has a meeting and that you need to leave. She’s in a good enough mood to at least walk you out herself.
In the firm’s garage building the two of you wait for the valet to bring your car.
She looks strange, sad, lonely. You love her. But you don’t know what to do about it because she gives you no place to put it. That’s just who she is. Her person. Being in a constant state of distress is part of her identity and really, there’s no escaping it. Self-imposed, mortal limbo.
“You’ll be okay?” She asks gently, like for once she means it.
“Yeah.” You tell her, tender. Human. “You?”
“Of course. I’ll be fine.”
“I’m sorry about your divorce.” You finally tell her. You didn’t say it at first when it was too new and too fresh. When she was more concerned with paperwork than emotional damage.
She shakes her head like the mention of it is merely a fly in her face. “Don’t apologize. I wanted to thank you for bringing those papers to David.”
“Anytime.”
“It’s just, you live nearby and it would have been easier for you to do it than Christa, and-“
“Seriously.” You cut her off. “It’s fine.”
She sighs and looks you over. It’s a long, extended look of softness. Mike looked at Abby the same way. But it’s a rarity from her; one that has you giving her a confused smile, hands going into the pockets of your jacket— the nicest, crispest one you own— as she stares.
“What?” You ask.
She steps forward, raising an arm, and you step back. She huffs, annoyed. “I wanted to give you a hug but you ruined the moment.”
You scoff incredulously. “You’re so weird.”
She glares. “Fuck you.”
The valet comes with your car.
Shitty, and old. Reliable and well-loved. Needs an oil change.
You step around to the driver’s side and the valet places your keys warmly in your palm. Your sister stays in the spot you left her in.
“Bye.” She says stiffly.
“See you soon.”
She glances at the valet. “Right.”
“Give me a smile?” You joke. You see her right hand twitch to flip you off but with the audience she contains herself. All she gives you is a deep-seated, disappointed frown and a shake of her head.
You grin and step into your car before driving off.
Even as you pull out of the garage you can see her standing still in that over-priced button-up shirt; arms wrapped around her torso, watching you go.
You tell yourself she’ll be okay but when a song from your childhood plays on the radio you doubt it.
Nostalgia will kill you before she ever does.
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fandomwe1rd0 · 5 months
Text
Rick C137 x Reader dating Headcanons!
This one is for the Rick simps! I usually don't do stuff like this, buttttt I like making headcanons soooo, also all of these are sfw! I don't think I'll do NSFW unless it's like- by super popular demand- But I doubt it.
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I feel like he would be a very jealous person, if he saw you hanging out with some other person, he would start getting possessive and would probably throw a sulking fit, then when you ask him he won't tell you, but it would be obvious why. He's like a giant man-child sometimes, in canon he's a very jealous person
He would be very physically affectionate with you, but he would probably tense up whenever it's returned, he's not uncomfortable with you or anything, he's just autistic as hell and is uncomfortable with physical touch in general.
He would be pretty protective of you, he's just protective about people he cares about in general. But there's also the added paranoia of what happened with Diane. He would kill anyone who touches you, and would badly hurt anyone who DARES to insult you. He's a weeee bit overprotective.
He would really value your time together, and his love language would be a mix of quality time and acts of service, he would just want to spend a lot of time with you, and would do nice things for you, but he would downplay it like it's no big deal, even when he does big gestures.
He would definitely call you names like baby, sugar, etc.
He would definitely be a bad influence, like if you said that you'd prefer not to drink, he would probably be like "C'monnnn baby, don't be lame." and would do stuff like that.
He would be extra affectionate when drunk, since he has less filter when he's drunk.
Whenever you cancel a date, no matter how good of a reason you may have, he would be EXTREMELY salty, he really values quality time and would be super sulky and stuff.
He would probably wanna take you on adventures but would leave you out of more dangerous ones, since he cares about your safety, even though he'd probably be bad at showing it.
He would probably want to cuddle and stuff, but wouldn't want you to cuddle back, because, as mentioned before, he likes giving physical touch, but doesn't like receiving it because he's autistic and we love him for it :)
He has a massive soft spot for you, and you're probably the only person he would act soft around since he's less guarded when it comes to his romantic interests
He would have trouble showing appreciation, but he does love and appreciate you, he's just not ok. He would also have trouble apologizing, even if he screwed up royally, but he would feel guilt at times, but probably wouldn't at others
He would sometimes go on weird, unhinged rants, for example, if he ever proposes to you, it would definitely be in an unhinged, but weirdly sweet rant, and you would probably feel flattered and terrified at once.
He would definitely say "Rick and [Your name] 100 years!" Since he says that in canon when it comes to his favorite people [Morty, Birdperson]
His flirting would get explicit pretty quickly, it'd be fine if you guys were alone, but he definitely would do it in front of your family and friends and stuff, either because he doesn't realize that that wouldn't be the time, or he simply doesn't care, your pick.
He would rarely, if ever compliment you, not because he doesn't love you, but because he's like physically incapable of showing affection through words, because he's traumatized and we love him for it.
He wouldn't say "I love you." a lot, because he has trouble with love due to *cough* Diane *cough* but he would show that he loves you, in his own unique way.
If he ever moves in, he wouldn't put in any work or do any cooking, he'd just be extremely lazy and would probably leave dirty laundry and beer cans everywhere.
He would be uncomfortable with PDA if you initiate it, but he would probably initiate it at times
You'd be the only person (Besides like, Morty) who can calm down when he's upset.
You'd be the only person who can talk him out of doing stupid and dangerous things.
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finnbbl · 5 months
Text
Hyunjin x M! Reader - Dancer AU | SMAU | Chapter 10
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Ch. 10 - Cutie | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter |
| Story Masterlist |
Written: Yes
Smau: Yes
Word Count: 0.8k
A/N: sry i fell off the face of the earth 😭 I got a writers block then got super busy and stressed with classes. Updates probably won’t be daily, I’ll update whenever the chapters are done <3 sorry to make you wait so long, and tysm for ur support !
P.S. let me know your thoughts on the story so far! i’m a bit insecure on some chapters and want ur guys honest opinion!
Warnings: Uhm swearing? Typos, not proofread. lemme know if i missed anything
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The night went on with all 9 of you guys joking around and having fun. For once, you felt as if you fit in, like you belonged somewhere. The night was nearing an end, most stores were closed as it was rather pretty late.
Everyone had decided to window shop. At one point, without even realizing it, you had wandered off. Although it was late, there were still a few other people out and about.
You weren't paying attention, and the next thing you knew you had bumped into someone. You turned towards him as you apologized profusely. He was taller, had darker hair, and was dressed in a hoodie with a jean jacket over it. "I'm so sorry, I should've looked where I was going." You internally panicked as you bent down to pick up his bag, which you had previously accidentally knocked out of his hand. "It's alright sweetheart, don't worry."
You froze. "Sweetheart?" Your mind wandered around that thought as you unknowingly. Your eyes were lost on his gorgeous face as you unknowingly kept a tight grip on the bag. The guy's sentence snapped you out of your trance.
"You okay?" Immediately, you let go of it. "Oh, sorry." A nervous smile fell on your face as you quickly handed it to him and brought a hand to your now warm forehead. The guy chuckled at you as he complimented, "You're cute."
His compliments keep catching you off guard, before you even had a minute to register anything he said, he spoke up again. "You're not busy are you?" You shook your head at his question, wondering how you even got to this point.
For a moment, you completely forgot about everyone else.
This guy was intoxicating. "I've seen you've been wandering around with some other guys, mind if I tag along?" It was at this moment your body decided before your heart did. "Sure, that's fine." Throwing him a smile as he held out his hand for you to shake as he introduced himself. "I'm Mingyu."
"Mingyu.. that sounded familiar." You had sworn you'd heard that name somewhere. Pondering as you connected his hand with yours, shaking slowly. "Y/N." Unable to form a full sentence as you left him with just your name. "Y/N there you are." A voice behind you caught you off guard as you saw that Bang Chan was running in your direction. He seemed a bit worried. "You can't run off like that this late." Chan took a peek at who you were talking to. "Oh hey! Haven't seen you in a while. What are you doing in Japan?" The leader abandoned your guy's conversation and went over to talk to Mingyu. "Ah just touring, we have some free time so." The way he spoke captured you, and you felt like you couldn't take your eyes off of him. "You don't mind if I tag along with you guys do you?" By this time, the other members had caught up with you three and now listened in on their conversation.
"Ah, I think we're about to head back, it's decently late.
Sorry about that."
"Ah no worries, as long as I can get this one's number." His hand laid a gentle tap on your arm. In the few minutes you had been around him, you could tell Mingyu was a very flirty person. This left you sort of embarrassed, but it also left butterflies swirling around your stomach. God, you know that these boys would tease you about this later.
And damn were you right.
After you all filed onto the bus once again, they started messing with you. "Awh how cute, someone has themself a boyfriend." Hyunjin who was next to you nudged our shoulder. "Stop." You pushed him off of you. "I don't have anything."
"Mhmmm sure. That's why your eyes were glued to his face during his whole conversation with Chan."
"I was just trying to figure out who he was. That's all." You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms in your seat. “Pfft yeah right, everyone knows who Mingyu is. Not a very good excuse.” Lee Know stated again. “Only his name sounds familiar, i can’t think of anything else.” You let out a sigh as you rolled your eyes. Letting your body flop back in the seat as you crossed your arms. “Damn, so you really don’t know?” Felix’s voice sounded and your head shot in his direction, a questioning look on your face as you shook your head. “So you don’t listen to Seventeen?”
Your eyes widened as the group’s name was said. “You’re kidding, Seventeen?!” You sat back up as you heard Hyunjin laugh from next to you. “So I just embarrassed myself in front of the Mingyu from Seventeen?!” You dug your face in your hands, slouching back down. “I don’t think you embarrassed yourself, all you did was make googoo eyes at him for ten minutes.” Hyunjin teased as he neared your face. Feeling annoyed already, you pushed him away. “You’re so irritating!” He only laughed at your reaction as you rolled your eyes. The rest of the bus ride was pretty much just the others teasing you. Although you didn’t particularly enjoy it, you definitely enjoyed the time you spent with them. Finally, you had found your place.
Taglist: @silverstarburst @virluna148 @galaxycatdrawz @onementally-unstabel-kid @uso-dakedo @lampcults @chaer4life
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megumidreams · 10 months
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Day 22 - Megumi Fushiguro {1:13am}
A/N: If you want to be added to the Fluffvember taglist send me an ask or a DM. The taglist will be open until November 27th, 2023.
Word Count: 0.7k
TW: nothing but fluff and one single kiss 😌
Fluffvember Masterlist
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People had begun clearing out before you would have liked. The party had been dying down at a quick pace. You had been so wired from the excitement that you knew that there was absolutely no way that you were falling asleep any time soon. As Nobara grabbed her jacket and made her way toward the front door you realized that there were only two people left. Yuji and Megumi.
Yuji was already throwing on his sweatshirt as you made your way over to both of them. "I hate to have to go, but I've got an early morning tomorrow. Gojo wanted me to go on a mission with him and we're heading out first thing."
You shook your head and smiled. "No no, there's no need to feel bad. You have something planned for tomorrow. Go get some sleep, Yu."
He leaned into you and placed a soft kiss on your cheek, a small grin painting his features as he closed the front door behind him. You sauntered over to the couch and fell onto it, turning a bit to face Megumi. He could feel his heart beating out of his chest as soon as you looked at him.
Megumi had always been nervous around you, nothing had been able to change that even though he had tried. He wasn't nervous for any horrible reason, he just knew that you made his heart beat a little faster and made him smile a lot more than anyone else could. He lifted his arm and scratched the back of his head apprehensively. "If you're tired I can leave and let you sleep too. It's not a big deal."
You tilted your head and bit your lip, the same little butterflies that you always got with him coming back to the surface. "You're welcome to stay for longer. I'm probably not going to get much sleep tonight. I slept in far too much this morning and I'm buzzing from everything that happened tonight."
He frowned at you, concern lacing his tone. "Are you sure? I don't want to keep you up if there's a chance that you could actually fall asleep."
The worry that you heard from him made those butterflies flutter even more. He was really concerned. Megumi Fushiguro was worried about you. You could barely believe what you were hearing.
"No need to worry. It's nothing new for me. I do this pretty often." You shrugged in an attempt to relax him but could sense his worry growing even more with the way he now looked at you.
A sigh left him as he moved toward you, your knees touching as he bit the inside of his cheek. "W-Would it help if I stayed? Because I can stay if it'll make you feel more comfortable."
Had he just offered to stay here? Had he been able to tell that the reason you didn't want him to leave was that you hated being home alone? And with your roommate being gone for the weekend you had been barely sleeping. Always watching for something to happen. Your entire being told you to say yes and your body language told him that before the words left your mouth. "I'd be perfectly fine with that Megumi. That would make me feel really safe in all honesty."
Megumi didn't answer you, but he felt that his next move would be answer enough. He leaned toward you, his hands coming up to your face as he cupped your cheeks. His lips captured yours, moving expertly against them like you had done it a thousand times before. You felt your cheeks warming, burning even, as he continued. Neither of you wanted to break it apart, reveling at the moment. Something that the two of you had wanted to do so many times before but had been much too shy to do.
Your lips seemed like they fit together so perfectly. It was like you were two pieces of a puzzle that was completed once they met. As he pulled away you couldn't find any words, and neither could he as he stared at you with love drunk eyes, much matching your own. And it was from that moment on that the two of you weren't afraid anymore. Telling each other exactly how you felt with no fear, showing the other how much you adored and cherished them. Meant exactly for the other.
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Taglist: @bakubabes-tatakae
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©️2023 megumidreams, please do not repost/modify without my permission, please do not use my work as ASMR without me permission
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stoplookingup · 18 days
Text
Umbrella Academy S4 reaction (spoilers)
I'm a little surprised how negative the reaction to S4 has been. It's flawed and a bit too loose, sure, but I think there's a thematic arc, to do with the painful but redemptive potential of selfless love, that a lot of people didn't recognize, or didn't like, possibly because it's too sentimental, or too tragic, or both.
In particular, I have a really different take on That Relationship. You know the one I mean.
But before I get to that, I just want to address the issue of unexplained plot points, of which there are certainly many.
Short version: Just let it go.
Long version: Comic-book storytelling is all about the impossible premise, the unlikely twist, the overblown threat, the arbitrary race against the clock, the catastrophic non-ending. A big part of TUA's appeal is that it takes that formula to an absurd extreme, unwinding a plot so convoluted and horrifying as to be comedic, then offering a resolution that raises more questions than it answers, and that seems final -- but is it ever? There could always be more. Even now. Because reasons.
But scratch the surface, and it's really all about the over-the-top super(anti)heroes who are surprisingly endearing, nuanced and tragic, whom the audience roots for despite a million reasons not to. Would S4 have benefitted from a few more episodes? No doubt, mostly to give each character their due (Klaus, my Klaus, you deserve more!), and to let the story breathe a bit. The plot probably wouldn't have made any more sense anyway. But c'mon, did it ever, really? So, why a subway? Why a squid? Why a diner? Does it really matter?
On to That Relationship, the much-criticized story of Lila/Five (aka Live -- can I copyright this?). This comically trope-laden ship (forbidden love, montage love, love triangle, enemies-to-lovers, pocket universe, happily-ever-after, etc) fits right into TUA sensibility. Despite being a bit underbaked, it's moving. The actors play it well, and in dropping their characters' armor, you realize how much armor they're usually wearing, how hard they're always working to cover their feelings. Out of all the characters, seeing these two having real emotions is most devastating, especially with each other. It's because this pairing is wildly unlikely that it hits.
Lila and Five have similar histories as traumatized, sensitive souls turned cold, cruel killing machines. They're smarter, more cynical, and stronger-willed than everyone around them. And they are clearly starved of love and desperate for connection. (Everyone on this show pays a price, but I find Five's terrible loneliness the most heartbreaking of all.) So then fate throws them together in a way that makes it inevitable they'll form an attachment, only to then demand of them the ultimate sacrifice. Their surprisingly quiet, life-affirming, Guinevere-and-Lancelot love is redemptive, in contrast with the meddling, selfish, and/or destructive love of others: Reginald and Abigail, Ben and Jennifer, Gene and Jean. Live aren't an unnecessary digression, they're central to the thematic development of the story. Sacrifice saves the world, but without love, there is no sacrifice.
And yes, I absolutely think Lila loves Five to the end. And while I appreciate that some might find the age difference between the actors off-putting, I don't think there was anything inappropriate on a Doylist level, and it all makes perfect sense on a Watsonian level.
Also:
Aidan Gallagher and Ritu Arya are extraordinary;
the use of Baby Shark is genius;
Diego, Luther and Allison have been the least interesting characters from the start, and S4 does nothing to change that;
Viktor needs a sense of humor;
I love that alternate universes are all the rage these days (so many great tropes started with Trek), but tbh Loki does it better;
as visual representations of the space between realities, I love both the Loki automat and the UA subway, but at some point, using recent-past retro design to signal liminal space is going to get old, which, come to think of it, will be deliciously ironic.
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fereldanwench · 7 months
Text
apropos of nothing and certainly not my tag rant from a few posts back
did you know that out of 150 popular video games released between 1985 and 2022, only 6% of them feature sole female protagonists?
did you know that prior to mass effect 3, female shepard was never used in any promotional material for the series?
(and there's no hard data available on this, but i very distinctly recall a lot of gamerbro outrage when me3 had an optional reversible cover so you could pick between male and fem shep on your personal game)
did you know that only 18% of players chose femshep in any shape or form (default or customized) during the original release?
(anecdotally, i know a few people who didn't even realize you could play a female at all in me1 bc of how the cc is setup)
did you know with the release of the legendary edition in 2021 the percentage of femshep players didn't even double (despite jennifer hale's seemingly enormous popularity amongst the broader playerbase over the past decade) and is reported at 32%?
did you know that dragon age inquisition has the same breakdown between male and female inquisitors (68% to 32% respectively)?
did you know during the playtests for assassin's creed odyssey, it was a 50/50 split between kassandra and alexios, and ubisoft suits actually thought when the game was released, kassandra would be more popular? and yet once again, about 70% of players chose the male protag
did you know evie and aya were both supposed to have a much larger roles in assassin's creed syndicate and origins but were forced into a smaller role bc the ubisoft marketing team didn't think the games would sell well with a female lead?
cdpr hasn't released data on male vs female v, probably because the game handles gender a little differently than just two strict options like many other rpgs, but it was revealed that panam was the most popular romance, sitting at about 68%, which means at least 68% of players chose the male v body. I'm sure some players did not make that choice as a cis male v, but i would also guess that those who didn't are a small minority of this demographic, and if you factor in kerry romancers, this split is probably very similar to other games in the genre
now i realize that a lot of the male v players who are in more transformative fandom spaces (like tumblr) are not the str8 gamer dudebros of reddit angry about pores on a female character's face and whatnot. i realize that a lot of you are also on the outskirts of the perceived norm and also feel under-represented by mainstream male protags and that's incredibly frustrating and alienating and i genuinely feel for you
but female protagonists and female gamers who want to play as female protagonists and who have a few niche spaces to celebrate female protags are not the reason for your lack of representation
and frankly you don't sound a whole lot different from the angry incel gamer boys when you say shit like "fem v gets too much attention"
so maybe try advocating for male protags who don't fit the generic boring gruff white guy mold without throwing women under the bus. we're should be allies in this fight, not rivals
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changingplumbob · 3 months
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Shay McClain - Hopeful Bachelorette
Entry for Mad About Dodo by @akitasimblr
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Tell us a bit about yourself. What do you do to keep busy? How would your friends describe you?
Okay, well, hi, I'm Shay. I never really fit in at school so after graduation while all my classmates headed to university I wanted something different. I've always liked making stuff so I was looking at getting into carpentry and then one of my dads had the best idea. They both know I love adventure and exploring so they suggested I travel and volunteer with organizations like Habitat for Humanity. I do a bit of carpentry when I'm home to keep the funds up. But yeah I travel the world getting to see cool places, surfing and mountain climbing, and putting my hands to good use making homes for people. Most of my friends are people I've met through that and they'd probably say I'm confident, my dads would probably say over confident, have a passion for making things, especially out of junk but in my defense people throw a lot away too quickly, and... just... a lust for life. But have you looked around? There's beauty in everything.
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And why have you applied for Mad About Dodo?
My dad's are worried I'll die alone so have been trying to sort out a way for me to meet people, of course they can't exactly organize a blind date for me when we're in different continents. Don't get me wrong, I would like love in my life, it's kind of the piece that's missing you know. Anyway they sent me the entry details and I have to admit, Dodo is cute. Not that I would just apply because of an attractive person but I was reading about how he's tried other challenges before and I admire his perseverance to keep trying. That's what we have to do at the job sites. So if he's looking for someone to sweep him off his feet I'll do my best.
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What do you think of your outfits?
I'm happy they're not just draping us in leaves and calling it a day. I think we've managed to pull together some stuff that'll fit in on an island. But why did we do a cold weather outfit? Aren't islands warm?
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How do you see yourself getting on with other competitors?
I've honestly no idea. But I can tell you right now they better keep their pranks away from me. Seriously, a joke that's made at the expense of someone else isn't a joke. Learn how to be funny without punching down.
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If you're the kind of person that can spot the good things in life I think we'll get on. I do hate small talk though, let's get to the good juicy stuff! Life's too short to be commenting on the weather constantly.
Tell us about some of your likes and dislikes
Well like I said I really like making stuff. I enjoy fabricating but my favourite is when I can carve stuff like sculptures or furniture. I'm also big into fitness, I like to keep myself in shape. I like yoga to even if I can't balance right half the time.
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Dislikes... juice fizzing. I'm not going to go into detail but I had a bad experience. Mischief obviously, I'll crack jokes anytime you like but don't expect me to tie you to a voodoo doll. Programming is also something I just find boring as well as research, so it really is best that I didn't go to university.
What are you looking forward to?
Getting to know Dodo. Hopefully he can be more than a friend. I'm also looking forward to testing out my survival skills. I think they're pretty good with the work I've done but you never know until you're in the situation I guess. But yeah, mainly getting to see if this guy is the one for me, if I can be the one for him.
What are you dreading?
Sunburn! And walking around not realizing I've been pooped on by a bird.
I know most people would probably say lack of bedding and plumbing but I've gone without them before, I can handle going without them again.
Do you have a message for Dodo?
Hey Dodo, if you want someone who can work wonders with their hands I'm here *laughs* No, I'm kidding, please don't tell him I said that. Umm... Hi Dodo, I'm looking forward to building this next part of my life with you in it. See you on the island!
Download SFS
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marshmallowprotection · 2 months
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What are your thoughts on the new Cg? Butler Saeran? I’m not use to the him nor Jumin and Zen with glasses. But they look good
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Normally, I would do a lengthy analysis post about the image, but there isn’t much here for me to analyze! I do want to write something for the anniversary that I will try to get out before the end of the month, but it's not going to be tacked onto an image analysis since there isn't much for me to say here other than point out a few Easter eggs. 
I got what I wanted. Jaehee in a tuxedo. This is what I manifested at the start of the month and I am grateful that we not only got her in a maid outfit, we got her in a butler outfit, too. Jaehee stans, you have won and she is front and center! This is her moment and she is killing it. I feel the need to stare at her for a little while because it's cute and there's no way I'm going to let this moment pass me by without really appreciating Jaehee aesthetically.
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I'll be honest, I don't know why the recent trend has been to make our boy Yoosung super clumsy. He's never really been a clumsy guy and I don't know where someone got the idea that Yoosung isn't on top of what he's doing. I will agree in saying he's probably the easiest person to bully in the entire universe because he's sweet and gullible, but he isn't clumsy, and yet, every image we've gotten of him this year other than his birthday image has had him busting his ass on the ground in one way or another.
Does ANYONE know why they're bullying Yoosung this bad? I mean, he's really cute here and I appreciate that he's trying his best to really impress the MC, but c'mon, give him a break.
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I did not realize how badly I needed Jumin in glasses. Jumin's already a very handsome person but somehow adding glasses really elevates it here for some reason. I don't know how his vibe has enhanced for me but it has. I wear glasses myself and I always have, so it's nice to see the characters in glasses in official artwork because I'm always super curious to see how they would look. It's working for Jumin, that I can tell you.
I like that his hair isn't as neat and tidy as it usually is, too.
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I fear they have slayed. Saeyoung and Zen are dazzling in their own right and I can't remember the last time they were drawn side by side but I think it's been a little while.
I've already noticed many people have pointed out that Saeyoung is wearing a ring. It's a little bit silly that he's wearing it over his glove, but I have to admit that is something he would do if this were his timeline. He is proud of the fact that he gets to live in this world, and he's even happier to know that he has somebody by his side who understands him more than anyone else. He's definitely that guy who doesn't stop talking about his partner because he's so in love. 
Zen with roses is something I've come to expect because he's also a traditional romantic. Red roses are the best way to captivate someone with your love and it’s no surprise that he follows that path. It might seem a little cliche but who is he if not somebody who loves romantic cliches? He is that guy who would watch romcoms with you all day long regardless of your relationship status with him, he just gets it.
I don't know how I feel about him wearing glasses since he doesn't seem like a glasses guy, but maybe if I saw him in sunglasses I might be able to rationalize this better. He's wearing a stylized pair here and I think it's the gold that's throwing me off. If it was silver, I don't think I would feel as perplexed by how I feel because silver fits him better as that's typically what he chooses for himself.  
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Controversial thing to say every time I say it, but I have to tell you guys that Jihyun is still my third favorite character in the game, and I really don’t mind when Saeran and V are drawn together. I recognize that they do this because those two are tied together as the leads of Another Story, just as the core five, meaning Yoosung, Zen, Jaehee, Jumin, and Seven are drawn together.
But, to me, seeing Jihyun with everyone makes me feel like there is a timeline where V did the right thing for everyone and asked for help at the first sign of trouble instead of continually shooting himself in the foot. A lot of the art that's drawn with V included is self-indulgent and can only exist as true fanservice because it would never be true in most routes of the game. 
Normally, I would expect him to look exasperated in art like this but he seems to be fairly confident which is a good change for Jihyun. I’ll take it! 
I have no idea what they're doing here, did they choreograph a song and dance? They aren't the most coordinated members of the group so that makes me want to laugh. It's sweet, but I have a huge feeling they're going to trip over each other if not on their own feet. Saeran is as cute as always, I could talk about him for hours.
Seeing him as a butler always takes me back to when Ray said he would be happy to be your butler in a huge mansion. That was utterly indicative of the fact he was willing to become subservient to you if it meant you would stick around. That’s what the first bad ending is all about. Unfortunately, he thought so poorly of himself that he would be willing to make himself nothing more than something for you to push around if that's what you wanted. 
At least, in this context, he's doing it because he wants to make you happy, sure, but it's not something he's doing to make sure you stick around, he knows you'll still be there no matter what because he doesn't have to work himself to the bone to prove he's worthy of your companionship. 
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I don't know if anybody picked this up but the painting is in homage to the anniversary image from two years ago. Rika was in the painting that time, and this time around, it's MC.
I do think it's worth noting that they are playing with light and dark imagery which is to be expected in a game that takes a lot of cues for religious imagery. Rika and MC are always bathed in white and black, light and dark, true contrast.
They're both wearing a dress that goes off of the shoulders, the only difference being the color and the style. MC has a more sleek pattern and Rika is bathed in ruffles. Rika’s seems to be more constrained and MC’s a little more loose around the edges. MC is free to make choices one way or the other by pushing outward, and Rika makes choices that go against her best interest as she pulls inward. I think another CG that plays on this is the BE from V Route.
Love her or hate her, there are important parallels at play here. 
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In conclusion, Rika has always been like this in official art and I don't know what to tell you.
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