#some stuff i just straight up cant stand ever

[re-animatedx]

the awful realization that... i do like horror movies... i just like the weird campy gay ones... for years I've been saying "I don't like horror movies they bore me," and yeah, for the most part they do. except when they start singing and dancing and/or being really homoerotic.

[k2ntoss]

Hi, hi, hello <: first time sending an ask to anyone but I cant stop thinking of this rn and I feel like you'd appreciate the comedy of this. So like, this is definitely a more crackfic idea than anything, but I was just scrolling on amazon for Valentine's gift ideas and i found this, and the idea of gifting it to Jason?? peak comedy in my mind

Imagine lighting it right before he goes on patrol just to mess with him a little too...👀 I just think it has so much potential for so many shenanigans, y'know? 😁😁

(I've been lurking around for a lil bit, gotta say I love your writing btw, it's great)

PRETTY LATE BUT I'M HERE, i tried to write something nice for a few days but i just couldn't squeeze my brain. NOW, i feel so honored to be your first ask, it's just so special so i really hope my little drabble is enough <3 and thank you so much for your sweet words baby

at first you wanted to get jason a nice edition of one of his favorite books, one of those expensive pretty books with a hard cover and write a lovely letter to him but scrolling and looking around some pages that candle popped up and you just couldn't resist it so there were now five items on your shopping cart, the book, the candle and stuff to wrap everything up. ready for valentine's day and getting him a pretty surprise in which you worked in every night as he went out on patrol until the day before valentine.

for those who think jason isn't that much of a valentine's day enjoyer let me tell you how wrong you are, jason enjoys picking up things for you because he knows it makes you feel special and even if it turns out into being more of a commercial holiday jason knows taking people for granted is not a good think, it's so easy to lose your loved ones and he's in no way letting you go one day without knowing how much you mean to him. so as soon as you wake up you're met by a big and warm hug, a chaste kiss on your lips and a pretty gift box on your lap; jason looks at you with a wide smile when you open the box just to find that sweater you saw on a store a few weeks ago, the one you wanted to get but couldn't buy because you were on a rush "jay... you didn't had to, this is just perfect" and it's simple but there's just so much in the fact that jason had in mind how much you liked that sweater and kept it in mind for days.

"i had to, anything for my baby..." he says softly and a sweet chuckle escapes his lips when you kiss him, arms wrapped around his neck before letting go of him to stand up. jason's eyes are fixed on you, your figure moving around as you pick a gift box from the closet just to walk back to the bed, going to sit on his lap before placing your gift on his hands and looking at his reaction as he opens it, the smile on jason's lips as his hands caress the book before he picks up the letter and seeing his green eyes tear up a bit is just so heartwarming you can't help but to cup his face with one of your hands.

"you know? you're the best thing that has ever happened to me" he says, a soft giggle slipping through jason's lips as he looks up to hide the small tears that are pooling on his lashline and it makes you nod "i think you've said it a few times before" and it makes you smile when he leans into your touch, nuzzling his face against your palm. suddenly, you remember there's still one more box you have for him and you stand up all of the sudden to go get it and he looks curiously at you when you turn around, holding the box and smiling widely.

"what do you have there?" jason asks, a small grin on his face as he sits straight on the bed before looking to the screen of his phone. it was almost time for him to go get ready for patrol, late in the evening he is just waiting to have a little more time with his lover. "it's a little surprise for both of us but by the look on your face i guess you have to start gearing up, right?" you ask before placing the small box on the edge of the bed "you can start, it's a small surprise so i can show you while you get ready" and the smile on your lips mixed with your soft tone makes him feel so lucky to have someone as patient and understanding as you by his side.

he nods happily, getting out of bed to start pacing around the room while leaving soft pecks on your cheeks and temples when he walks next to you, small playful kisses on your lips when he stands in front of you to start changing his clothes. jason is being specially sweet and playful today and it just fuels the need to use that little new gift, it's just something you can't help but think when jason is stripping in front of you just to get into his black compression shirt and the tactical pants that just make his body look even hotter. as he starts putting onto his armor you sit, legs crossed on the bed as your hands hold the box with a wide smile "so can i steal your attention a little now?" and jason turns his head around to look at you before nodding, going to stand in front of you.

your hands toy a little with the pretty bow to open the box, revealing the not so small candle and the label on it and jason's face is a mix between a poem and a stream of ideas of how it can end up "babe– how do you plan on using that?" he asks, a low laugh escapes his lips and it sounds like a growl because of the ideas popping on his head "well, i think the idea is pretty clear" the playful smirk on your lips is driving him crazy but he has to go on patrol "are you gonna wait for me to come back? i'll try to be extra quick" and his voice sounds so excited, because it's what was missed to make this valentine's day the perfect one.

"extra quick? i wouldn't want you to get in troubles, jay..." you start but you know damn well he is going to insist "no, i will be back before you even notice" he rushes before leaning in to kiss your lips in a firm and deep touch, hands on your hips to push your body a little into the matress and any idea of making him go with his full patrol vanishes when he bites your bottom lip and grunts a little into your mouth.

he pulls away, triumphant smile on his face before he walks out of the room to get his helmet and you rush to put the candle on the little night stand next to your bed before lithing it in the exact same moment jason sets a foot back on the room, stopping on his tracks as soon as the smell of vainilla hits his nose "sweetheart..." he starts but his first instinct is to pick his phone up to call dick.

if he was going to ask for a favour he was going to make it worth it, you lit the candle and he really couldn't think of anything else to do. probably the best gift for you both because it could help him expend more time with you.

"dick, c'mon! i'll do anything you want me to, i swear it's important" you can hear his voice and the urge on his tone as he speaks on the phone "it's not my fault i actually have a valentine's date!"

it makes you chuckle because it only lets you know how much he wanted to accomplish what you were asking him and to wait a little for him your eyes drift to the label just to find out the candle could be used in a few more ways than just start an encounter.

"it's a dinner date, okay? we made reservations!" jason sounds almost desperate at this point.

"jay! it's a body wax candle! can we try wax play?" you ask, not even noticing your voice could be heard through his phone.

"so dinner date, huh? i don't want the details, i'll cover you with bruce"

[the-s1lly-corner]

Various crps x reader who struggles w/ self care

I miss old creepypasta fandom sometimes (unrelated to the post)

Characters: slenderman, eyeless jack, nina the killer, masky

Notes: reader is GN, can be read as romantic or platonic, very self indulgent for the admin but hes keeping it mostly open/vague so those can also enjoy this, admin uses any pronouns for nina

CWs: none

SLENDERMAN

still in love with the idea that hes not fully aware of your needs as a human but hes knows the bare basic minimum- something about him not being a human himself and not regularly interacting with them to know what to look out for blah blah blah/lh

notices youre a little more down than usual and he does his best to find out whats wrong- are you sick? tired? hurt? is his human okay? its kind of like seeing someone fret over their pet, except its this old cryptid and his human friend

mostly stands off to the side and quietly passes you some water and snacks, keeps your glass full so you dont have to keep getting up- or a bottle of water if you would prefer!

though its not unlikely for him to get more assertive with his care, he might just pull you away from bed and try to get you cleaned up. if you let him hes going to be doing everything for you

will interfere with outside things so you can have a day to yourself to rest and recover (ex. fizzing out work calls, messing with any electronics if anyone is bothering you, ect ect, god forbid someones actually making you feel horrible on purpose)

EYELESS JACK

very good at reminding you to drink water and take your meds (if you have them), i like to think that sometimes he lives vicariously through you because you can still eat human foods and that bleeds into generally what you need to put in your body-

what i mean to say is that he is great at keeping track of things for you if you struggle with it! time, energy, or just not having the motivation, hes making sure you get what you need even if you cant do it yourself

does his best to get you some extra boost of vitamins and stuff in an attempt to boost your energy/mood, obviously he knows its not going to be a magic fix but its better than nothing.. hes the one cooking though! for reasons that align with the first bullet point!

very straight forward and blunt when asking if theres anything wrong, he can come off as disinterested or annoyed based off of his tone but genuinely hes trying his best to help you open up... jack himself isnt used to opening up so he doesnt have much experience being gentle and soft

brushes through your hair before you both go to bed

NINA THE KILLER

nina can be a bit of a hypocrite when it comes to this sort of thing as they tend to not... take very good care of themselves.. though its mostly out of not remembering to keep to a routine

does her best to get you to go out and do something with her that will eventually lead to you taking care of yourself in some way- asking you out for lunch or doing an activity that gets you extremely messy so you have to go take a shower

if your lack of proper self care is caused by any personal struggles you may be facing, nina makes it more than clear that you can go to them to talk

easily the most non judgmental person ever, you can tell her nearly everything and shes not going to think of you any differently

opens up about her own struggles to make you feel less alone

THE monarch of reminding you to take your meds, if you have them

MASKY

watches you from the side like a cat, kind of just keeps an eye on you throughout the day to make sure you're still kicking

will push a plate of snacks and your meds to you- like a cursed little charcuterie board!

he would make you a meal but ignoring the fact hes not a good cook at all, he feels it would be easier on you to just have snacks.. better something than nothing

will keep you in bed if youre tired or sore, will keep you pinned to him if he needs to- you might just take it as him wanting to cuddle...

and he never cuddles so to you this is a once in a blue moon experience!

or do you need to get up and stretch? hes going to do something to get you up, be it pestering you until you come to get him to pipe down or trying to get your assistance for something

might even lift his mask up next to you to get you to brush his teeth with him

[extravalgant]

i looove azteca from like. a narrative stand point

because we have this hero and thats you. were practically the stuff of legends by arc 2 just because of what kind of experience we have under our belt. we've never lost a fight, and it's assumed that we never will. that's how powerful the wizard is—everyone expects them to win, expects light to triumph shadow

and when we fail.... well. it shocks everyone doesnt it? people get angry. people get disappointed. to the wizard, who has never known failure or disappointment, it must feel like an entirely new thing. this culture was here for thousands and thousands of years—a culture and a people you never knew about until you were brought into the spiral.

and now because of you its gone. because you failed to save it and stop morganthe, its gone. and i think merle's passiveness about this situation hits a little differently this way—i read it more as disappointment, anyways. and to someone who has never known defeat, not to this capacity, with this many casualities and victims, the disappointment feels a little more crushing, doesn't it? the wizard is supposed to be a hero summoned from the legends, from a place not beyond a spiral where they had not heard of magic, and it feels like they let everyone down.

this imo is where morganthe truly establishes herself as a villain. i mean she already was a villain before imo BUT bringing a grieving man back from the dead to puppet around AND destroying a world is just straight up evil (and i love that). people like to complain about the malistaire bit which is valid in some cases but i think it really does sell the frivolity in which she chooses to go about things. like hey heres a man you killed with your own hands. probably when you were young. i brought him back from the dead to use as my pawn and now you have to fight him again btw. using a dead grieving man for my own goals. and then the fact that we cant beat him at the end, to 'send him back', is just another way she gets a leg up on us. she leaves us with unfinished business and xibalba destroying azteca is just icing on the already fucked up cake she's given us.

shes TAUNTING us. and this is important because it does come back to us in khrysalis—no doubt the wizard is still haunted by the sins of their past; their failure to save azteca. they have to get through this bit, to learn to let it go, before they can learn shadow magic. after all this, it's still stuck with us—our failure, one that she spearheaded.

dont even get me started on the wizard learning shadow magic maaaaaan because now they share one thing in common—they know shadow magic. they wield shadow magic. and shadow magic is so reviled that it's forbidden. no one else but her can really understand the isolation that comes with learning shadow magic, and it parallels the wizard and her even more because neither of them had a choice! the shadow magi turned morganthe into the shadow queen she is today, and we are subsequently forced to learn shadow magic and do the same if they ever have a chance at defeating her. i love it. i LOVE it. i love azteca... i love khrysalis....

[burntb4bydoll]

BAE I NEED MORE 2023 BILL STUFF 😭😭😭 PRETTY PLEASE POOKIE 😫

YOU GOT IT BAE🤭🫡

ALSO IM SORRY IF U DONT LIKE THIS!! YOU DIDNT REALLY SPECIFY WHAT YOU WANTED SO I JUST DID THIS IDEA IVE BEEN THINKING ABOUT

@ilovebill-and-gustav

2023 Bill Kaulitz x reader whos a member of Tokio Hotel

•yall probably had a super duper sweet childhood friends to lovers type relationship

•he loved you ever since you joined the band but both of you were too young and awkward to realize 😭

•as you grew up, neither of you could hold back your feelings anymore and eventually got together. Everyone was so relieved that you guys FINALLY got together, they were so sick of your obliviousness 💀

•going on tour with him is SO GREAT

•obviously Bill is very fun and energetic, so hanging out with him is always a good time

•he makes you make tiktoks with him😭 also makes you take SO many instagram pictures for him. He also takes a ton of you but you never need to ask him to do it, he already takes them without you asking him

•and ofc you guys share hotel rooms and also share a bed on the tour bus

•everyone likes to joke about how you guys are never seen without each other and both of you always deny it. Butttt literally every time the paparazzi takes pictures of you, he is standing right there too. And you are almost always in every picture he posts

•GETS MATCHING CONCERT OUTFITS WITH YOU

•and he wears his big ass platforms so he gets you some too so that the height difference isnt too much💀

•one time you almost tripped and ate shit while on stage and he laughed for about 5 minutes straight. Like yall had to take a break so that he could get himself together 😭 you were just rolling your eyes the whole time while trying to be mad at him, but it was so funny that you couldn’t help but laugh too

•gives you a kiss between every song🤭 he just gets so excited and filled with adrenaline that he cant help but give you a couple of smooches 😇

•post concert sex is 100% a frequent thing for you two

•and the rest of the band complains the next day because they can hear you through the hotel walls, and yall go on for hours😭

•OMFG YK HOW HE POSTED ABOUT HIS VACATION AFTER THE TOUR? WELL OFC U WERE THERE TOO!!

•he loved spending that alone time with you in such a beautiful place. And he definitely whines when its time to go home because he was having so much fun with you and he didn’t want it to end

•overall yall have such a cute and healthy relationship and hes the best bf ever

[honimello]

all papas general headcanons

basically just headcanons i have about their past, childhood, and personalities! and some other stuff like physical description and personal experiences.

—

a/n: these honestly probably might not fit the canon like at all or what some of you might head canon but that’s okay cus i’m just letting my brainrot fester at this point. i left their relationships open ended so there would be imagination room for like an x reader thing lol. also i picked their birth dates based on vibes alone and i know very little about the zodiac signs i just thought it would be fun lol

warnings: angst, vaguely implied abuse, poor childhoods, character death, mentions of sex and sexual orientations, (nihil fucking sucks and sister imperator kinda does too), (also all papas are alive), vague mention of eating issues, mentions of wanting children, mentions of marriage, one nsfw bullet point for each so 18+ MDNI!! also not proofread

primo: 68, born september 14th, 1955 virgo

5’10, around 140ish pounds, blonde with shaved hair, but used to have long hair that he would braid and came down to below his lower back. speaking of his back, he has a hard time standing up straight now so he appears shorter than he is.

his mother was a random woman from a bar, nihil only found out about her pregnancy until she was 7 months pregnant. sister imperator was rightfully very angry finding out about this, but she had her suspicions of his promiscuity. she often took out her anger on primo, especially when he became papa and she gave him more work than he probably should’ve been doing. although, she did slightly lessen up on him around the time when he had taken in copia.

he’s actually quite sad he never really got to meet his mother, but he didn’t have much time to think about it once his brothers started coming along. he stepped up more often than not in taking care of them, he was more of a father (and a mother honestly) than nihil would ever be. and sister never really had any interest in interacting with him or his brothers, except for copia.

speaking of copia, primo found out about him when copia was around 11-12 and he took him in quite fast. it only took one look at that little boy for primo to know it was his brother. when he was younger he used to get a little jealous that sister imperator was so invested in copia’s wellbeing and upbringing given that she had never been a mother to him or his other brothers but primo eventually just found himself feeling grateful copia had a mother, even if she wasn’t a very good one.

when primo became papa he got rid of the prime mover position, seeing how it destroyed sister and nihils marriage as well as his brothers childhoods made him incredibly angry. he also didn’t care for the connotation that women are made to have children and carry on the bloodline only. he’s a romantic (and a feminist), and that notion always made him nauseous.

secondo visits primo the most out of all his brothers, copia often visits too but doesn’t have much time. terzo only really visits when he is having some sort of emotional or personal dilemma that he cant figure out on his own. primo doesn’t mind, he’s willing to help his brothers and see them whenever he can. though in his old age he does get quite lonely and wishes they could make more time for him, but he doesn’t hold it against them.

primo finds himself wanting children now that he’s older, even if he might not be able to bare his own anymore he often entertains the idea of adopting one of the orphans at the ministry. he wishes he had someone by his side as well, and while his random sexual encounters with few siblings are enjoyable, he longs for a more steady companionship.

it’s harder for him to get erections now but still enjoys having sex, even if he doesn’t always come. is very good at oral and fingering and definitely loves to spoil his partner. will probably cry happy tears if someone sucked him off even if he couldn’t get hard all the way, he still enjoys it. can still fuck hard but will probably be very sore afterwards. pls give the old guy a nice warm bath after and maybe a kiss on his wittle head.

secondo: 57, born august 18th, 1966 leo

6’2, around 180ish pounds, brunette but has shaved his head since he was 20, huge resting bitchface even when he was a baby, muscular but has put on some pudge since becoming papa.

his mother was the first prime mover in around 100 years, she was a sibling of sin who nihil had a passing attraction towards and decided to torture sister imperator by naming her prime mover. she died giving birth to secondo. secondo blames himself, and tends to despise himself because of this.

in his teenage years he often spent sleepless nights crying for her, how much he wished he could’ve met her or at least seen her as there were no pictures of her. he wondered if she would love him, be proud of him, or fight to be his mother like terzo’s mother did. or if she would leave and never come back like primo’s. now, in his older age he has come to reconcile with the fact that he will never know. but even though he never got to know her, he still misses her dearly.

after secondo loses his papacy, he throws himself into ministry work. he works long hours, well into the night and spilling over into the weekends. he’s an archivist and restoration expert, working on artifacts important to the church. he feels like this is the only way he will not go insane. he loves terzo but he does not believe him to be ready or fit to be papa when it comes terzo’s time. and he is partially right, as terzo definitely lets the power go to his head but over time he becomes more in control. secondo finds himself feeling sorry for his little brother when terzo loses his papacy, it was wrong of sister imperator to take it away from him like that and secondo hates to see what losing the limelight has done to his brother.

secondo is known around the ministry for his intimidating visage and aura, as well as his wrath. but what people don’t pay attention to, is just how often he bites his words. he has worked very hard to keep his anger at bay, even going to therapy to find more healthy ways to cope with his trauma and rage. in fact, he does his best to be polite and kind to everyone in the ministry. but his kind is different than others kind, he comes off as cold and calculating. his emotional range is very limited and he finds himself struggling to open up to anyone. the only person he’s ever opened up to was primo, and even then it isn’t really opening up if his brother can just read him like a book. secondo often doesn’t have to say much for primo to understand what he’s going through. primo helps him through it regardless, as he’s always done since secondo was a baby.

secondo isn’t sure if he would want kids of his own, but he does love children very much and is very good with them. he often volunteers to run events for the orphans at the ministry.

he would like to fall in love but thinks he is much too old and not nearly attractive enough to find a long term partner. has flings here and there with some siblings of sin but they aren’t very serious. he isn’t sure if he’s really quite ready to give up the party life yet no matter how much his aching bones say otherwise.

does frequent bars and clubs to feel like he’s still a part of the scene after losing papacy, but it doesn’t quite feel the same and most nights he leaves drunk, angry and alone. the few nights when he finds company are not as fulfilling as he hopes they would be, and it isn’t the other persons fault it’s his. he feels so melancholy now it’s hard to focus on simple pleasures like sex, especially when he hardly has the time with how hard he works. he often lays away most nights wishing he could’ve done better as papa, even though he knows people love him and respect him he still feels like he never quite did enough. he feels like he isn’t enough.

loves sex, and can get quite rough but is very, very good at aftercare. definitely not picky about sexual partners but tends to prefer people who are shy cus he enjoys bringing them out of their shells and getting them to snap at him. secretly wants to be fucked and dominated.

terzo: 54, born june 12th, 1969 gemini

5’3, around 120ish pounds, black hair like nihil and wishes he looked more like his mother who was a redhead, definitely spot treats grey hairs, hates the idea of getting old and is very insecure about having wrinkles, is quite small but still a little chubby, though he lost lots of weight since losing papacy. might be bigender or genderfluid but is afraid to really think about it too hard.

his mother was also a prime mover, but she fought to be in his life even as sister imperator tried to push her out. she was a very loving mother who did everything she could to teach him to be a good man, to be nothing like his father who she had come to despise. she taught him many things, she taught him how to dance, to draw and to cook. he loved her very, very much and it tore him up when she passed. he was 14 years old, and that’s when he decided to put up a façade. he did not want to be vulnerable anymore, he didn’t want to have to be sad or scared at least not where anyone could see him.

primo often held him in his bed when he would cry about losing his mother, he had nightmares for years. he vowed to himself to not let himself ever be so vulnerable in front of any one again. to this day thinking about her kills him little by little, though he is much better at expressing his feelings.

his flirtatious and playful persona is something he really relies on in his older age, he thinks it’s all he’s really good for anymore. a show and a good lay. and when he loses his papacy he absolutely crumbles. the persona completely falls away and he hides himself in his quarters most days. he loses weight and wallows, he becomes enraged by fate but he finds he could never really be mad at copia for taking over, it’s not his fault anyways.

in his teenage years he was quite promiscuous and took on many lovers, and while he still has casual flings with some siblings of sin, he never lets partners overlap anymore. he’s a gentle soul at heart and he learned that very fast, he can’t stand seeing someone upset, even if he’s only attracted to them in a more primal way it would kill him to see someone upset because of him.

i believe he is very loyal and if he were to get into a relationship with someone, even if they didn’t state that they were exclusive, he would still ere on the side of caution and not have sex with anyone else. i think if he were in love he would be hopelessly devoted, he’s more sensitive than he tends to let on and cheating is not something he would let himself do. maybe when he was young, he might’ve slipped up somehow, but not now. he’s much too intelligent and much too mature, he’s grown and he knows how to control himself now.

and while he does have quite a lot of sex, i think the sheer abundance of partners has been greatly exaggerated through false rumors and gossip. people tend to lie about having slept with him just for the five seconds of fame it brings them, and that often causes problems with people thinking he has cheated on many people.

is terrified of marriage but longs for it desperately, he wants to feel like someone wants him for him and not because he is/was papa. he’s not sure if he wants kids, he’s horribly afraid of being a bad father.

is horrified of being like nihil in any way, and nearly throws up when someone mentions that he has the most resemblance to nihil out of all his brothers.

is a huge giver sexually, could literally come from just watching someone else come. loves to overstimulate and go above and beyond. doesn’t really require someone to reciprocate and take care of him as well but it is deeply appreciated as he can also be quite the pillow princess.

copia: 52, born october 15th, 1971 libra

5’8, around 130ish pounds, light brunette hair that is going grey at the sides, is very petite but with a softness to him especially around his belly, hips, and thighs, he has light freckles all over his body,

he was an accident, sister imperator never meant to get pregnant but she had planned to tell nihil about the baby until she had caught him with yet another sibling of sin. she decided it would be better for copia to grow up as an orphan in the church, and to be raised by her secretly. copia didn’t even find out she was his mother til primo had found him and taken him in at age 11. sister often pushes copia to work harder, her hopes for him to become papa one day slowly begin to become his hopes as well. and it’s hard for him to say if he really wants the papacy or if he just wants her to be proud of him.

he grew up very lonely and outcast, the other orphans in the ministry thought him strange and unappealing. he had been told from a young age that he was ugly and weird. now that he’s older, he’s since found out that he’s autistic, but he knows that’s not the entire reason they didn’t like him. he thinks maybe he really is just strange and ugly. and as a young boy, when he’d found a rat scavenging for food outside of the ministry, he thought to himself he’d finally found a friend who was like him. unloveable and unwanted. misunderstood.

growing up he never understood the importance put on sex and romance, it isn’t until he’s older that he realizes that he’s demisexual and demiromantic, but it doesn’t really phase him. he never really cared about those things, he doesn’t care that he’s old now and hasn’t had sex, it’s not something he would want unless he really loved someone and had a deeper connection to than just passing lust. although, at night he often dreams of meeting someone he could have a connection with, and those nights are the only ones he really partakes in lust alone in his bed. dreaming of something that could be, but in his mind, is more likely to be just a dream.

when he becomes papa he is terrified, not only of the immense pressure on him to be the best he can be and do good for the church but also of losing himself. yes, he loves the new attention this is giving him and yes, he loves feeling important now. but something just doesn’t sit right in his stomach. again, he’s not sure if he really wanted to be papa anyway or if he just wanted to complete a goal that was thrust upon him at a young age. he tries not to let his papacy change him, and for the most part all it really changes is it brings him out of his shell a little more. he begins talking to more siblings and higher clergy members, but like always, he ends up lonely. they’re never quite interested in copia and more interested in papa, and he doesn’t understand because to him they are one in the same.

his stage presence is very different to his real presence, he likes to let out his “wild side”, as he calls it, when he’s on stage. he feels more comfortable, more free to be sexual and flirty, as well as quite commanding, when he is in front of the crowd. mostly because he knows they like him, that they’re there to see him. it gives him quite the confidence boost, in his performance and his personal life. he doesn’t get quite as depressed as often as he did as cardinal but now his depression holds much harder topics to grasp. things like his identity and where he belongs in the grand scheme of things, and if he will turn bitter like terzo when he eventually is traded in for a newer papa. he hopes not, but envy was a sin that often came easily to him.

is terrified of aging in a similar way to terzo, he feels like he is already very ugly and now that he is getting older he feels like he is becoming even more unattractive. he tends to avoid mirrors as much as possible because his reflection nauseates him, he hates his face and his body with a burning passion.

he does not indulge in the willingness of siblings like his brothers do, while his stage presence may suggest he is a sexual person (which he is honestly) he hasn’t felt any sexual attraction to any sibling of sin so far. most of which only really approach him because he is papa, and while he has no problem with guiding and helping his flock, he does have a problem with it when they ask for him to fuck them. it’s not something he wants.

is also the only papa to not participate in sexual rituals and black masses, though he does oversee them and encourage siblings of sin to participate if comfortable. he celebrates others choice to lust but doesn’t feel tempted to lust for anyone else.

when he is in a relationship with someone, and he does feel sexually attracted to them, he is incredibly eager. he has done his research i can assure you, countless videos and articles on sex and hours of “research” watching porn of the porniest variety. he gets quite horny, and before his partner he masturbated quite often, he isn’t innocent by any means. he is a virgin and is quite awkward, tends to fumble and trip over himself a lot but he isn’t subtle about wanting someone when he does want them. definitely a switch, pls someone peg this guy.

——

hope you liked these!! and if u have any questions or just wanna indulge me in conversation, i would love to talk more in depth about these headcanons!!!

[yeehawpim]

HI UM i really admire you and your art and i was wondering --

so i really love the way you format your comics, its really straight-forward and lets the reader process every word with ease (which i think adds to the impact of the writing), and that one rue comic with the split colors for the parentheses... how do you do it without making it look so messy?? to bring up another example, the hide-and-seek comic- i love how subtle and genius the call back to hiding behind the door was, it blew my mind... i take a lot of inspiration from the way you format and lay out your comics but for some reason i cant wrap my head around how you do so much with so little (in reality this might just be the result of me wanting to add so many little details for others to find , while being conflicted on keeping it simple, and,,, AGH...) for context : im trying to make a comic about isolation, but i keep filling up the page because i want to add things - when really i know i should be keeping it simple... but other than removing unnecessary details, i want to know what else you do to make your comics so clean and simple yet it rips out the emotions from your heart and has you stare at it as it beats. like... i want that type of impact!! i want to affect others on such an intense level!! i want to induce emotions!!! but how?

(sorry this was long, HAHAHA i just want to drive my point home- again with the 'wanting to add a lot of stuff to prove a point' thing but i digress)

ok first of all that is a huge compliment and it means v much to me, thank you 😭🙏❤️❤️

tbh for me the answer of keeping things uncluttered is paying attention to spacing and eye direction. Spacing depends on timing, if you want an action to happen slowly for instance you can make the space between panels longer, or take more panels for someone to complete an action. There's tricks for directing your eye, if you ever read anyth about focal points (eg biggest contrast, triangular shapes pointing towards what's important), but really with comics I keep in mind you're reading left to right and top to bottom.

The ruehob comic is actually simpler than you think 😅 I already knew which text had to be on the left and right with august's text post. And after that the "lanes" were so narrow there weren't a lot of complicated things I could do, just make sure you still read left to right and saunter vaguely downwards.

when you talk about putting little details, that doesn't necessarily have to distract people. Like I honestly applaud you having the drive to do detailing. You just have to make sure your compositions allow for it. Like if you think about ghibli backgrounds, they're elaborate and beautiful af.

For smth about isolation, my first thought was that you can draw a person in a setting alone among a bunch of objects, for instance. If you keep the person small but surround them with a bunch of detailed objects, it could feel very lonely. Just make sure the person still stands out b/c they're what's important, so for example the background stuff is a less saturated colour, or the person is the least detailed thing on the page. I think that's the main thing, you just have to make sure the things important to what you're saying stand out. Clarity is rlly half the battle when I'm laying things out haha

In school our teacher called this "killing your babies" because it sucks when you work hard on a cool drawing and it just doesn't work out😂This also still happens to me, it's actually partly why I keep things simple so I can work fast and throw out less

Here is a timestamp from supereyepatchwolf's video about Chainsaw Man, which has some of the coolest fuckin layouts

He's got other stuff that talks about manga and how eye direction can work and what cool stuff has been done. Off the top of my head his vid about one piece and his vid about gantz have helped me understand how to cause Emotions. Also I think he has one about Junji Ito that specifically talks about how details can make you scared, if you're into that 😂

hope this helps!

[roseworth]

thoughts on eddierose?

my eddierose thoughts are very similar to my jayrose thoughts tbh! i think theyre so much fun together and i love seeing them show up but i like them better as friends

their dynamic when they first show up in tt03 is soooo much fun bc <3 theyre both so insecure about their place on the team so they band together and become ride or die and its so sweet. rose thinks that she doesnt belong on the team but as soon as she perceives a threat against both of them she jumps to eddies defense <333 theyre so cute

its so much more interesting to me when theyre just friends because at this point neither of them really have any other friends. theyre both going through really rough periods in their life (eddie's aunt died, his mentor abandoned him, and he sold his soul to the devil. rose just left slade and is still struggling with who she is) and they latch onto each other because theyre the only ones they feel like they can trust :''') eddie never knew rose when she was with slade which she likes because she hates the version of herself that was being drugged but no one trusts her because they saw her. but eddie didnt and he knows that she was being drugged when it happened so he trusts her <3 they both just need someone to be there and actually care and thats what they are to each other!!!! to me it loses some of the impact when its romantic because its a very meaningful friendship to both of them

however. smoking scene my beloved. this is the most iconic thing anyone has ever done shoutout straight people

AND. GOD. my favorite of all time is when eddie gets hurt and rose loses her shit and tries to fight everyone

me when rose is worried and feels powerless so she immediately starts deflecting and covering up all her feelings with anger 😍😍🥰🥰🥰💞💓💞💕💖💘💕💓💘💖💗💓💞💘💕💞💖💓 thats my girl!!!

i cant really see them as romantic together just because their relationship is so much more fun when theyre just being friends instead of when they start pushing for more romantic stuff. at the beginning theyre kinda like a team of the two of them and its so sweet :') theyre constantly looking out for each other and hanging out together when no one else is and its so much fun to me ! even during this period that johns was setting up a future romance but in my head they were just friends and it was great

also omg. the issue where rose is accused of being a traitor and eddie immediately goes "ur wrong actually! thats my bff and she would never do that" <3333 i love this issue because no one actually believes rose would do that but i looooove eddie's reaction because he never doubts her and never stops believing her because! thats his buddy who talks shit about her dad 100 times a day! and he knows her well enough even after such a short time of being on the same team <33

anyways. as much as i stand by mckeever's rose later on i haaaate what he did with eddie & rose. first of all if youre not reading it as her being a lesbian, the shit with "rose is pretending to be friends with blue beetle to make eddie jealous" is so fucking stupid. she suddenly starts acting like she doesnt give a shit about eddie and constantly ignores him which is completely different than what she was doing like 5 issues prior. then eddie is also completely obsessed with her??? like its no longer a "thats my friend and i like spending time with her" its a huge (seemingly unrequited) crush and like?? bringing her flowers and passing out at the sight of her. i really hate it

then in fresh hell theyre suddenly so much more romantic than they ever were before and it just feels ?? weird and unearned??

maybe im just a hater but this feels like it comes out of nowhere. the last time they interacted before this she was brushing him off and lying to him to make him jealous then next thing you know theyre staring longingly into each others eyes and going "i would go anywhere with you babygirl 😍" what is going on!!! mckeever wanted a romance between them so bad that he forgot to put in any of the buildup. like this is sweet but it just feels so forced to me

BUT. oh my god. the ending of fresh hell where she starts hallucinating him is so fuckign hhghmghhm <3

BECAUSE. HES FUCKING DEAD AND SHE DOESNT KNOW. it makes me emotional every time i think about it. shes having a crisis and thinking about him and she has no idea hes already dead. im still so mad that they never showed rose's reaction to eddie being dead because hgjhghhmmh!!! thats her buddy!!!! thats her only friend!!!!!!! let me see her upset that hes dead!!!!!!! fuck. its very in character for her to lose someone then ignore that it ever happened and never bring them up ever but still.... :(

i just think that theyre so much fun together <3 they have such a good friendship and i love seeing them hanging out and looking out for each other <333 i dont mind them romantically when its done well (smoking scene) but unfortunately most of the time their romance is so boring to me. let them be friends!!! let them be close platonically without the halfassed will they wont they!!!!

[simplygyuu]

Nouvelle Crown - 003 : 7 eleven?

tweets and written!!

synopsis : choi beomgyu, the second prince of the royal choi family doesnt have much of a life outside of his duties. even then hes not allowed to do much, his brother is the crown prince after all. but when he meets you, a regular commoner girl, through his brothers friend soobin he cant help but be intrigued. commoner life is so different from what he knows and you are the only person to treat him like the normal teenager he always longed to be. with you he gets to experience the normal, teenager life behind the backs of his overbearing family.

The last way Beomgyu expected to be spending his night was walking down the dark streets, not one guard at his side and only being accompanied by Kai. Honestly he was pretty fucking freaked out simply by the fact that he snuck out. Never has he done anything rebellious, too worried about being perfect enough to finally get some praise from his family. Being anything but perfect had never even crossed his mind (even if he happened to make mistakes from time to time, which usually ended up in a breakdown).

Either way he couldn't help the curiosity coursing through him as well. He never went outside of the palace grounds if it wasn't for a public appearance and he definitely didn't go to this side of town. What was up with all the overgrown plants and flickering street lights? Why were the shops so run down looking and small? He didn't know this was simply the lower middle class, not even poverty. He was just that out of tune with his own nation since he's always been so sheltered.

"I promise nobodies gonna be outside at this time, especially not at a 7 Eleven." Kai reassured him, confidently leading the way. Kai had a lot more freedom than he did, Beomgyu often longed to live as a Huening instead of a Choi. "Speaking of 7 Eleven, how do you not know what that is?"

"You know how my father is, Kai. Hes so crazy about me leaving the palace and coming in contact with 'commoners' and all that. He doesn't even want me learning about anything in our nation outside of the rich people stuff. Im still surprised he even lets Soobin hyung and my brother be friends." Beomgyu mumbled, eyes big and curious as he took in the unfamiliar scenery. He had a mask on curtesy of Kai, just in case somebody saw them.

They lulled back into a comfortable silence before Kai pulled him into a building with the most atrocious green, red, and orange color scheme. A bell jingles above their heads as they walked in, catching Beomgyu off guard. Hes never even gone shopping before, so this was all new to him.

"Im gonna go look for some jellies, you should explore. Who knows when i'll be able to get you out here again." Kai gave Beomgyu a little shove towards a row of shelves before walking away. Thankfully, Kai was tall and easily spotted over most of the shelves which eased Beomgyus nerves.

Hesitantly Beomgyu glanced around, standing there awkwardly for a few beats of silence before finally walking down an isle. Immediately his attention was caught onto the shelves filled with snacks ranging from chips to things like pickles and other snack foods. It was the weirdest assortment of foods hes ever seen.

While walking he wasnt looking straight, eyes glued to scanning the isles before he found himself bumping into something. A high pitched yelp met his ears, causing him to whip his head around to see a girl falling. Without much of a thought he jumped forward to put one hand on her elbow and the other on her waist for a split second as he kept her from falling. As soon as she seemed to be balanced again he let go and took a step away, immediately bowing towards her.

Now when you said you wanted to restock on peanut butter you didnt think that would lead to you almost being bulldozed over by this tall guy with pretty eyes and nice clothes. You hadnt even noticed him in the isle until he full on ran into you.

"Im so, so very sorry! I didn't mean to bump into you, I apologize for my careless actions." The man spoke, his eyes on the floor as he avoided eye contact guiltily. The way he spoke was different thats for sure, weirdly formal for someone who looked so young.

"No, its okay dont worry about it." You reassured him, you could feel his guilt coming off him in waves and it made you feel a bit bad for him. "It was a honest mistake!"

"Ah, still.." He trailed off, fiddling with his shirt before perking up. "What are you buying? I can get it for you! That way I can make it up to you." He exclaimed, eyes crinkling into an eye smile which made you assume he must be smiling underneath his mask. You didn't want to make him buy you something but he seemed pretty adamant. This could also be a chance of friendship, maybe you could agree then ask for his number so you could treat him to coffee as 'pay back'.

"Alright, if you say so." You finally said after a while of silence, turning back towards the shelf where you carefully picked a jar of peanut butter. You could feel his eyes on your back but you didn't say anything.

"Cmon then, this is all I wanted." You piped up, beckoning him to follow you as you approached the cashier. Out of the corner of your eye you saw how he wouldn't stop looking around the store in awe, has he never been to a 7 Eleven or something? You huffed a bit at the thought, thats just impossible.

As you gave your peanut butter to the cashier and heard the girl recite back the price you felt a gentle tap on your shoulder. Turning around you saw him holding out his card hesitantly.

"I uh.. dont really know how to do this.." He mumbled, scratching his neck. You couldnt help but smile a bit even if it was pretty weird. Then, you actually noticed his card. Your eyes widened as you noticed he was holding out a black card towards you, how rich was this kid?

You took the card, making a conscious effort to not see the numbers since you didnt want to have some rich people on your back before inserting the card and stepping away to let him input his pin. A few minutes later you both were stopped in front of the exit as he bounced a bit on the balls of his heels and kept looking back towards the isles.

"Wow! You have a black card?! What are you doing out here then?" You couldnt help but ask once away from the cashier, eyes wide. Sheepishly he looked back at you and fiddled with his sleeves.

"My friend brought me along with him but I dont really know where he went.." He replied, glancing towards the isles again before focusing back on you.

"Hmm.. Hes probably getting a drink in the back. Its hard to see back there from here anyways." You informed him kindly, noticing how fidgety he seemed. "Oh, thats right! Do you think I could get your number? You seem cool and I think we could be good friends! Plus, I'll need to repay you for buying this for me."

For a few seconds he just looked at you with wide eyes and you couldn't tell what was going on inside that head of his. You assumed he was going to say no with how long he stared but you were pleasantly surprised when he finally took the phone from your hands to input his number. Once he handed it back to you, the contact 'Gyu' was added to your phone.

"Thank you! Ill send you a text, yeah? See you around, Gyu!" You said happily, smiling as you waved goodbye and stepped out the door easily. He would be a nice addition to the friend group, you hummed.

--------------------------------------------------------------

previous masterlist next

notes : HI FINALLY THEY MEET! sorry if the pov changes are a bit confusing but i hope ur enjoying this so far!

reblogs and replies are really really appreciated and keep me more motivated to keep this au going :)

taglist (open) : @mazeinthemoon @pokyloky @run2seob @bluebearybeom @wonioml @rikismiel @yumilovesloona @captivq

[swiftfootedachilles]

*vibrating intensely* hi please tell me your autistic Mickey headcanons I'm collecting them

ohhhh i have so many thoughts

ive already talked about this ad nauseum previously but i always have time to discuss my favorites autist

his hatred of sleeves is totally an autistic thing. he just hates sleeves, specifically anything thats not long sleeved or sleeveless

he seems to prefer warm weather. he bundles up sooo much in the winter and he talks about moving back to mexico in s11. he would rather go back to prison than move any more north than chicago

i am once again mentioning that compulsory heterosexuality is absolutely part of mickeys masking. he seems to not gaf about masking about a lot of "typical" autistic things like not understanding social cues/rules or lacking conversation skills. a lot of his masking is more survival based like seeming straight and masculine and tough

^ which makes sense that when he starts unmasking, he likes patterned/hawaiian shirts :') he loves how visually simulating they are and he can tolerate the sleeves bc the fabric is very breathable and light

he really likes loud sounds specifically loud music and ambient/outside sounds like the ones he looks up in s11 to help him fall asleep :) he seems like the kinda person who can only do one thing as once, ie cant listen to music and play video games at the same time. when he does something he has to Devote Himself To It. if hes listen to music thats what hes doing. hes gonna sit there with his giant ass headphones on and stim or just cover his eyes and focus on the lyrics. hes s natural loud talker. he could yell over a jet engine if he wanted to. altho he doesnt like people raising his voice at him for obvious reasons. he cant stand pure silence it makes his skin crawl. ian loves his peace and quiet so mickey often throws on his headphones for parallel play. ian cooks or reads his book in quiet and mickey listens to deftones or doomscrolls on tiktok. parallel play becomes a huuuuge part of their bonding as a married couple :)

when he gets overwhelmed he completely shuts everything out. he acts like a cornered animal and lashes out at anything even if someone is trying to help. he needs space until he calms down or he'll have a meltdown and start throwing/breaking things or causing physical harm. sometimes he becomes too overwhelmed too quickly and completely skips the "shutting everyone out" stage and go straight to getting physical

he stims a lot by hitting or throwing stuff so ian trains him to use soft things like pillows and plushies (he absolutely has a plushie collection) when stimming. i think he also hits himself on the head sometimes. :( (totally not projecting) but be mainly sticks to his regular stims like messing with his eyebrows, chewing his nails, and biting his lip. he has an oral fixation! ian gets him a chew necklace. he likes singing and dancing with ian tho hed never admit it. he likes flapping his hands and jumping but hes still too embarrassed to ever do them. he unconsciously sways and rocks, especially if hes in the same spot for a long time

ian absolutely buys mickeys most of his sensory/stimming shit. lights, weighted blanket, spinner ring, chew jewelry, peelable clear nail polish, bike chain (which we see mickey has on his bedside table in s5 so i 1000% believe this was his first stim toy!!!) toy, tangles, different types of plushies (squishmallow, squishables, jellycat, reversible octopus (mickeys fav they both have at least one for every possible emotion), plushie dreadfuls, palm pals, different shapes and textured fabrics.) ian often steals a lot of these plushies; they are their first children. after they move back to the southside and are doing some work on their house, ian notices mickey still needs the catharsis of breaking shit, so sometimes they go on dates to the junkyard with baseball bats and destroy shit together

mickey literally cant be in the same room with ian when he eats his eggs with ketchup. the concept itself is so gross he cant tolerate it

hes very sensory seeking, again partly because of his oral fixation. he likes spicy food and LOVES sour food. obviously he loves candy and junk food. they have lamps, other small lights, and color changing led lights all over their home. eventually they both fall into a routine of communicating nonverbally using different colors of lights

mickey isnt great at communicating verbally tho he tries. sometimes he just cant, its too overwhelming and he cant think of the words to properly express himself. hes much better at conveying his thoughts thru physical means. this is part autism, part learned during childhood

he learned literally everything he knows about society thru movies. he uses a lot of old slang and makes niche references. he refuses to explain any of them to ian

sometimes he goes nonverbal and he texts only using (sometimes too many) emojis and reaction images that nobody gets except him

most people think hes weird and dont get his sense of humor but ian thinks hes the funniest person on the planet! they often make references to inside jokes in front of other people and it annoys the shit out of everyone

ok i have to stop now or im gonna go on forever thank you for the ask

[toxic-lullaby]

The brothers as Types of Shoppers

Characters: The Brothers x gn!mc

Warnings: None

-----

Lucifer

You ever been makeup shopping with your dad and he's like standing on the other side of the isle as you blocking traffic and being like "Is that it?" every 5 minutes? That's him

Very focused shopper, not interested in mall walking with you. He gets what he wants, pays, and leaves. He knows what he likes and exactly where it is in the store.

If he's shopping for someone else, however, he'll take his time. Not too long though, he just doesn't see the point in being in stores longer than he needs to.

Mammon

You can send Mammon into the store for like a cucumber and he'll still come back with a shopping cart of stuff. Candy, a watch, a camera, you name it, which is impressive because the store was a grocery store.

On the upside, he will get everything you need. If you send him with a list he'll actually get the stuff.

Has a store card for like every store ever

Will definitely haggle with the cashier or debate them when they say he cant get a deal. No they cant give you a buy one get one free on the pencils they're literally in a pack together

Buys wayyyyyy too much of everything. I can see him couponing then selling the stuff for full price.

Takes tags off of clothes that are too expensive and urges Asmo to do the same.

Leviathan

He is an online shopper this is canon

He has connections, you will never see him in a store running errands ( ik hes been to stores in canon but now he hasn't bc i said so/j)

He goes to the anime store and the human world Japan themed store in the mall every once in a while if there's some drop that is in stores only. He tries not to though because he got into an argument with the store clerk after they mixed up the Ruri-chan fanmade ova with the main canon

Satan

Most normal guy in stores, mostly

He's always looking for something specific and won't settle for replacements. Will rant for 30 minutes if they moved items or removed them from the store.

I can't see him clothes shopping very often, look at the way he dresses

Uses the self checkout religiously because he apparently can do it better than the people who's job it is to check you out. He is his dad's brother's son brother

Asmodeus

World's longest shopper, not even with clothes, just in general.

Straight lollygagging

Read the labels and everything, even if he's bought it before

Has a store credit card or two, nothing like Mammon. Just for the stores he frequents the most like Majolish, starbucks maybe, he seems like a starbucks guy

One of those annoying people who argues on the phone in the middle of the store

Asks the store workers their opinions on the items he's buying way too much. "What're your opinion on these eggs? Have you ever tried them?" like ??

Beelzebub

Eats the food in the store, brings it to the checkout open wide. I used to be afraid of eating the grapes as a kid meanwhile he's eating the grapes, a rotisserie chicken, drinking the milk.

Always falls victim to the snacks at the checkout

Usually rounds up, not even to be generous he just doesn't want the change

Never gets a basket, dropping items left and right because he didn't grab a basket on his way in and refuses to go back for one. "Sir, do you want a basket?" "No 😊😊”

Belphegor

You're lucky if you catch him shopping

Another in & out guy, he's got better things to be doing like sleeping or napping or snoozing or dozing off

Cannot be bothered with cash, he's a credit card guy

I can see this grown man sitting in the basket while you push him around and shop

- - - -

[thewebcomicsreview]

Oh hey, Homestuck 2 updated! I was expecting this to be an 11/11 update since that's a Homestuck arc number, but it's the least important of those by far.

Egads! What a despicable plan, devised by a devilish dame with a dastardly disposition. The wretched wiles of a wayward woman with a penchant for the wicked. A hullabaloo most hideous and heinous, hammered out by-

One of the biggest mysteries of Homestuck 2 is who's narrating Candyland with Calliope gone, and the more narration-heavy style of the new team is really calling attention to that. This is very flanderized Jake English dialogue. Also a dramatically more active Jake English than we've seen all...ever?

Under no circumstances can you allow her to get to The Point.

Gonna have fun with that MacGuffin name, huh, writers? It occurs to me that Jake was supposedly a spy the whole time but this is the first indication that he's actually been telling the resistance anything instead of just calling himself a spy as a cope.

I like this art a lot. But also what the hell is Meenah doing here? Last time we saw her, in the epilogues, she was out in space and stole the Ring of Life from John before escaping into a server beacon. Did it lead her into the black hole (lmao get owned), or is this an alternate timeline ghosts? Are her eyes closed in order to drag out that reveal?

JAKE: Shit, sergeant! Cant you add her to the groupcrab? MEENAH: groupcrab MEENAH: cod damn thats good MEENAH: i just been callin em prawnference calls

As fish puns go, "Prawnference calls" is excellent.

MEENAH: idk but hypothetically speaking if i was posted up in my big mean bitch pants just gettin my empress on and you told me insturgeonts were tryin to shore up on some kinda mythic skaian artifact

So, Meenah has her eyes closed to prevent me from knowing if this is the alpha version or a doomed ghost, and now she's dropping very vague hints about what the plot point is. This does feel very homestuck, in that it's teasing out the reveals to maximize speculation. Skaia is, of course, related to SBURB, and thus this is confirmation of the fandom assumption that they're going to start a new game, without actually saying much else.

I have no idea why this air vent is Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff style, but Vriska kicking the sound affect is still funny.

The comedy quotient has increased notably under the new team.

VRISKA: John, she's a Vriska. She can handle herself! I'm sure she can take anything this fake-ass timeline can throw at her! JOHN: what?

Wait, John doesn't know? I thought "Everyone 'knows' candyland is fake and that why they're acting so weird they're just LARPing" was kind of my headcanon for a lot of the weirder candy stuff.

VRISKA: This whole universe is like someone's shitty RP, and everyone's out of character! None of this reads! VRISKA: Like, who the FUCK is Yiffy!!!!!!!! Why should I or anyone CARE????????

I'm so meta even this acronym

JOHN: a long time ago i was supposed to go back and defea- VRISKA: SNOOOOOOOORE! VRISKA: Your ecto-human-guardian-si8ling or whatever is pro8a8ly sending a squad of 8ozos to apprehend your ex as we speak. So I say the less we talk and the sooner we 8low this gru8sickle stand, the sooner we can get there 8efore we lose access to our shortcut. JOHN: yeah when you spell it all out like that i can see what y- JOHN: wait, WHAT!!! JOHN: why didn't you just say that earlier?! VRISKA: John. That's what I've 8een doing this whole time! VRISKA: Now, c'mon! Race you there!!!!!!!!

I don't ship them or anything, but this John/Vriska dynamic where John is kind of the oblivious straight man to all this wacky nonsense is one that Homestuck has been very light on since Act 6.

That was a good update. It was funny, it moved the plot along, and it gave us stuff to speculate about! And the art was really good!

[quaranmine]

Hi yeah its me again, sorry for the spam, not my fault you made cool and inspiring stuff. This time actually, i couldnt help myself and have made a short crackpodfic of an alternative universe which is basically 'AU where Mumbo is frolicking in the wild and Grian doesnt exist cause itd be too sad for him to do so, so hes gone.' Its stupid, ist badly written (literally my first ever creative writing work other than a 300 word school asignment) but like idk. if you dont want to or cant read it (cause its so bad and burns your eyes out) you can just not read it xd idc honestly but decided to maybe give you the choice of reading it or not. Excuse my weird and unusual ways of writing dialougue and monolouges This is part 1 of 3

Jellie meowed cutely, demanding for food most likely just as a familar figure walked into his cabin. —Oh Hello Cub! It's wonderful to see you again! How was the trail, you're earlier than usual, no? — Scar exclaimed happily, looking at the sweaty man now standing before him. The air was hot, the many glass windows of the watchtower could make a great greenhouse. The open windows allowed for a warm flow of the early summer's air to pass by and refresh the mostly closed space. —Hey hey. Yeah the traffic was better than usual, but there was more sand in on the trail today. I think it could be the Sahara desert dust that was supposed to get carried in with the wind. — Cub said, taking his backpack off and pulling out a rag to wipe his head off. No matter how many times he hikes through this trail it never gets much easier. — Oh, Cub. The Sahara desert was blowing on Europe! And also it's the 80s and this specific situation you're referencing is gonna happen in late March of the year 2024! That's at least 35 years into the future! —Oh yup I forgot. Sorki bout that —Cub, you silly silly man! — Scar said in a singsong tone. Both of them started laughing and looked straight into the readers eyes, smiling.  Hi reader they both thought and went back to laughing looking at each other. — Actually, Scar, while hiking I heard some tourists talking about some newfound cryptid roaming these parts, what's up with that? – Eh nothing special, some bikers saw a 'humanoid lanky bugman' or something. — The man said — I've seen it all over, people come, they see a black bear or a deer in the shadow and think it's a newfound species. But honestly! I gotta give credit to the bikers relating said encounter cause the guys were better than most at storytelling! The missing food cans, rustling in the bushes all around them, the feeling of being watched.. Truly creepy stuff! And then — Scar took in a breath, talking so much in one long exhale left him almost dizzy —the moment when they saw it fully...They described it as 'particularly lanky with black fur' and something about purple-pinkish fingertips as well as residue on its paleish naked face with a weirdly shaped snout. 'Like a Walrus' they said! A crazy comparison for a bear, but you know, human mind can do wonders! — Scar clapped at the last statement and closed his eyes smiling charmingly at his companion who was now drinking the rest of his water.. After a while, comfortable silence filled the watchtower as both of the men enjoyed eachothers company. Jellie was now purring against scars leg and promptly jumped on his lap demanding more pets as Cub had finally spoken up — Any new paintings done in the meantime? I don't recognise these two, are they new or recycled? — He asked, curiosity clear in his voice, lookin at the, indeed, two new paintings decorating the cabin. One of them depicting a landscape with a sunset. From where Cub was sitting, he could watch the same, now hidden under an overcast, mountains and trees. The other painting was of a group of three tufted titmice sitting on a branch. Cub took out his American bird field guy and read a couple of paragraphs to scar on what kind of bird has he drawn exactly. It's weird that he saw these birds cause apparently they don't live in that part of the US! Crazy.

HELPPPPP this is completely insane the best way, thank you. Love that Grian doesn't exist here because it'd be too sad for him. Love the fever-dream quality to the writing. In all the best ways you're taking me back to the crack fics I'd read on ff.net in 2013, it's great. Love the breaking the fourth wall abou the Sahara dust and the (assuming) European birds. You've got a certain hint of Douglas Adams flavoring happening with the switching to an "above" perspective for a moment to give a wry little fourth-wall comment.

Mumbo Jumbo, new forest cryptid. I can see it. If Hermitcraft!Mumbo eats redstone, do you think forest cryptid!Mumbo would eat like...rocks??? dlfjskfljslkfs

[gallavich-headcanon]

hi this is my 3rd time writing it (my app keeps crashing) and ngl im kind of annoyed so ill keep this short and sweet cus the last time i tried writing the idea out here it just disappeared, so:

a magic au

mickey is a dealer of sorts, he gets his clients all and any ingredients they need for spells and potions, as well as other things they might need. he gets a new client and the first meeting doesnt go well, the person isnt too keen on his gruff and no-bullshit attitude. they end up fighting and mickey is cursed into a cat, the only way to break the curse being to get someone to treat him the way he treated the witch.

ian is a healer witch, he meets mickey in one of the worst ways he could - as hes walking out of the corner shop he almost knocks the cat out with the force with which he opens the door.

the cat - mickey - hisses at him, his tail held out stiff and straight very obviously unhappy with being hit. ian, lover of all things living, immediately feels terrible crouches down and takes something out of one of his grocery bags and holds it out to mickey.

the cat looks at him doubtfully but smelling the piece of ham the red head is holding out in his palm mickeys tummy rumbles almost painfully (its been two days since hes been turned and hes had no luck in getting anyone to feed him or finding anything to eat in the wild) so he carefully moves closer to the man and takes the ham out of his hand quickly and practically devours it.

ian feeds him a few more pieces until the cat visibly calms down, he even pets it scratchingg behind its ear as he whispers apologies. then he stands up slowly and with one last look at the cat moves to get to his apartment. he doesnt notice the panicked look on the cats face.

it takes mickey all of 3 seconds to decide that hes going to follow the man. in the last 2 days no one seemed to even notice him, he cant chance another 48 or so hours of hunger and general misery.

he follows the man home and hopes the stranger will at least give him some more food before he closes his doors in his face.

ian doesnt notice the cat is following him until hes in front of his house, and by then he feels like he has to get the cat in for at least one night.

he makes dinner for both himself and the cat and after spending the evening in front of the tv he goes to bed. during the night mickey wakes up and decides its as good time as any to get started at annoying the man until he shouts at him. admittedly he feels kind of bad to be pushing stuff to the ground and digging in the plants but its his only chance at getting back to being human. by the time hes done its almost dawn and the sky is turning grey, he curls up next to the bed and waits for the man to wake up and start screaming.

except he doesnt. when ian gets up, moves out if the bedroom and into the combined living room and kitchenhe notices the mess right away, but instead of getting angry he just chuckles to himself lowly. he did bring a cat home and as far as hes aware cats need entertainment to stimulate their brains. he quickly cleans up before getting breakfast (for himself and the cat), getting dressed and leaving for work. when he comes back, hes carrying a bag filled with different types of cat toys.

mickey is so fucked.

-------------

tldr;

mickey gets cursed into a cat and to break the curse someone has to treat him the same way he treated the witch (i.e. yell at him) ian finds him in front of the grocery store and feeds him, mickey follows him home and ian takes him in after which mickey gets fed again only to decide during the night that if hes ever to go back to being human he needs to piss the guy off in a major way, cue mickey knocking stuff off the table, and other places. it seems to be going well, the destruction not too much but seemingly enough to get yelled at. except ian doesnt yell, he doesnt even get mad. he lets out a barely audible giggle and as he comes home from work later that hday, hes carrying a variety of cat toys.

i got this idea at 2am yday and couldnt get it out of my head or write it down in a way that made sense so here is a bunch of words that seemed to make sense to me, hope you dont mind. also would really appreciate your thoughts♡

xx

HOLY SHIT MARS! OKAY I AM SO EXCITED!

mickey is a dealer of sorts, he gets his clients all and any ingredients they need for spells and potions -> This reminds me of a fic I read but I can't think of the name...

mickey is cursed into a cat, the only way to break the curse being to get someone to treat him the way he treated the witch. -> okay this is very fucking cool. So he treated the witch like shit and now he needs someone to treat him like shit...

ian, lover of all things living, immediately feels terrible -> of course he does! I would too! poor kitten! He's so tiny and pretty.

he doesnt notice the panicked look on the cats face. -> poor Mickey! he's probably so tired, especially after finally eating for the first time in two days. he probably needs a warm place to take a fucking nap.

but instead of getting angry he just chuckles to himself lowly. -> Oh Ian you're such a sweet man. Mickey is never turning back into a human, isn't he?

MARS I need more! I am not kissing you better continue this story! This is such a cute idea. Mickey will try to do the most fucked up things and while Ian probably punish him (no snack, spray him with a water when he tries to eat the plants) he doesn't yell. Mickey tries to bite him and Ian thinks that they're playing.

But life as Ian's cat isn't so bad. He gets cuddles and warm bed and food, He can watch tv while Ian is at work. I'm dying to know how long it takes Ian to realize this isn't a real cat.

[alexcaninnit]

Completion

It looked down at its hand, frowning. Or, he would be frowning, if he had a mouth anymore.

Everything hurts. 

Constantly.

The Old Donnie gave him some sort of charm to help, but it only lessened it just slightly. 

It knows that it is incomplete. Slapped together like a shoddy children’s art project. 

He just wishes that it did not have to come with so much pain.

His bones ache, its muscles always burning. He tries not to even think about his melted, mutilated face. It hurts more when it thinks about it. 

So, Abel gets up, and walks down to the lair, the area of the New York sewers where Mikey and his siblings live. He likes Mikey. He also likes Raph. Leo and Donnie seem to both be scared of him.

But it needs their help for what hes specifically trying to do, so hopefully they will agree to help. 

He walks into the lair, having to duck a lil bit in certain doors, but not much. All the openings are a good size for him because Raph is so large, and apparently going to keep getting bigger. 

Abel knocks on Donnie’s lab door, the purple metal sliding open as a very tired looking Don looks up at him, wrapped in a fluffy bath robe. His eyes widen and he fixes his round glasses.

“...Hello.”

Abel waves, then, like Mikey taught him, signs, ‘Can I come in?’

“..Sure.” Donnie lets him in, pulling his robe a little tighter around himself. He is scared to be around Abel. It does not blame him for this, he is a scary person. “What do you need?”

‘I want you to fix me.’

Donnie blinks, confused. “Fix you..?”

‘Everything hurts. I cant eat, or speak.. Im incomplete.’ Abel signs, sitting down on the floor. ‘I want you to finish me.’

Donnie looks at him for a long while, and then nods in understanding. “Okay. You get that this is gonna be a lot of work, and probably hurt?”

It nods.

“And something might. Happen.”

It nods again. ‘It cant hurt worse than it already does.’

He sighs, running a hand over his face. “...Okay, lets get to work.”

The next week was awful. 

Abel spent most of the time under some very heavy magical drugs, drifting in and out of conciousness to sluggish, dull burning to excruciating, searing pain, then back down into dull, throbbing nothingness. Most of the time, he spent having vivid nightmares, soothed only by Donnie’s surprisingly reassuring voice.

Eventually, he opens his eyes and sees bright lights, and Leo and Donnie standing above him, brows creased in concern.

“...Abel…? You good, buddy?”

Abel manages to nod, then, mustering all his strength, sits up.

And then he nearly starts sobbing. 

It doesn’t hurt anymore. 

He hugs himself, tears slipping down his face. Leo puts out a tentative hand and pats him on the shoulder, concern in his eyes.

“You okay buddy?”

He signs, with shaking hands, ‘It feels so good not to hurt,’ and Leo looks visibly relieved, relaxing. 

“Okay big man. We gotta run some tests, okay?”

Abel feels his blood run cold. He hates tests.

“Just a few.” Leo quickly reassures. “Just some stuff to make sure your new body is working right.” 

Abel nods, Leo smiling and holding up a lil light. Not too bright. “Follow the light with just your eyes, not your head.” He does so, and Leo nods. “Good job! Now reflexes,” he taps Abel’s leg and it very nearly kicks him across the room. Leo manages to dodge. “OH SHIT- Well. At least we know theyre working.” He laughs. “Everything seem to be working. You can hear and smell well? Everythings okay?”

He nods. 

“Fantastic.” Donnie hands him two crutches, fastening them around his arms and pulling him to his feet. He quickly balances himself, Donnie helping him to get the hang of walking around. “Youll have to use these for a bit, okay?”

He nods, standing up as straight as he can. 

“Wanna go see Theo?” He nods again, and Donnie smiles a lil, texting someone on his phone. “Alright. But first,” He pulls him over to a mirror, and, for the first time in. ever, really, Abel looks at himself in the mirror.

And he starts crying again.

Looking back at it is. Him. 

He, pretty much unsurprisingly, looks like Theo. Just taller, with redder eyes, and shaggier hair (somehow.) He’s wearing a simple black shirt and sweatpants, with some bandages still wrapping his limbs. He still has a few of his scars, a few stitches, but it kinda likes the way it looks. 

“Not bad, huh?” Leo grins. 

Theo sighs for the umpteenth time, still walking with Mikey, her hand over his eyes. “Whhhy are your hands over my eyes.”

“Becauuuuse theres a surprise waiting for you!”

He sighs again. He is not fond of surprises. 

Eventually, they stop walking, (in front of Donnie’s lab, he can tell based on the smell,) and Mikey giggles. Theo can hear three other heartbeats. 

“Okay okay okay okay. Now you can look.” 

Mikey removes their hand and Theo finally opens his eyes, and then, almost involuntarily, gasps.

Standing in front of him are Leo, Donnie, and Abel. Except that Abel looks entirely different from before. He has hair, for one thing, long and black and fluffy just like his. And he’s slightly shorter, but he looks even smaller bent over  his silver and pink crutches. He also has a mouth again, the melted and mutilated skin now removed. 

Abel gives him the most adorable smile hes ever seen, then, opening his mouth, he rasps out.

 “Hi Theo.”

Theo chokes out a sob, immediately pulling his little brother into a hug.

“It.. doesn’t hurt, anymore…”

[princesseevee06]

hgayxghays. looked at the relationship Chart. pretty please would you unpack what ranmarus + shins + midoris relationship is because I have the reading comprehension of a five year old and cant infer things. and also because you can't just tell me ''I am not unpacking all of that'' and never explain why!! also your amazing.

OMG IM SORRY I MEANT THAT RANMARU IS THE ONE SAYING “i’m not unpacking all that.” I’D BE HAPPY TO UNPACK THEIR DYNAMIC FOR YOU!

i’ve actually made a meme about them before because their dynamic is very funny to me lmao

in reality there isn’t too terribly much to say about them, it’s just ranmaru taking One Good Look at the most rancid-vibed men he’s ever seen and saying “nah, i’d rather not deal with that.” it’s very funny to me because some of the most stand-up participants like ryoko and kugie respond to the tealblings’ (yes this is what ive decided to affectionately call them) misdeeds by being like “you can’t do this! i won’t let you get away with this >:(“ whereas ranmaru is just like “i’m gonna be so real. you can do WHATEVER you want. just leave me out of it”

but sou isn’t a quitter, and he definitely tries to manipulate ranmaru into doing stuff for him at some point, but i haven’t quite decided whether it would actually Work or if ranmaru would straight up be like “no???” yet haha. i think ranmaru could potentially be persuaded into working with the two if they brought up the prospect of escape.

also thank you for saying i am amazing 😭 YOURE AMAZING!! i’m just a silly guy bringing my silly ramblings about my AU to tumblr dot com so i’m glad you enjoy it