#sometimes i just need to rant/vent

[awakefor48hours]

In case this needs to be said: don't trauma dump in a stranger's tags. It's disrespectful and not something people really want to see.

[nemo-of-house-hamartia]

ok, once more I realize that my own kindness and friendliness has been taken for implied consent, and as always, the troubles that are brewing now are connected to OCs.

So let me be clear and frank one more time, one last time, because I have NO INTENTION of going through what I went through in 2021.

While I am always immensely happy that my Original Characters are enjoyed and that they can serve as source of inspiration, they are NOT however a template for anyone to base their OCs on.

They are not something that you can take in their entirety, change whatever suits you, and then call it your own.

It doesn't work like that, especially because, and allow me to reiterate this once and for all, OCs are *immensely* personal.

They are an extention of the soul of the person that creates them.

So taking whatever suits your fancy and use it for the "aesthetic" or the "vibes" is immensely disrespectful and, dare I say, rather impertinent, especially when both characters happen to belong to the same fandom.

Now, I am not talking about certain tropes and subjects that are typical of certain genre, of course not.

We are all somehow reinveting something that's already there when we work with OCs and stories.

What I am talking about is taking certain specific idiosyncrasies that make a certain character unique, change them to suit your character, and then being SO IMPERTINENT to just call it your own and parading it around without even having the courtesy to quote the person that has inspired you, taking advantage of the fact that I am just a small creator with a small following.

This is a huge No No for me.

Huge.

I appreciate that other creators might have a different opinion or perspective when it comes to OCs, and while I do not share entirely in that, I sure as hell respect it.

But allow me to be crystal clear: if this happens to me, like it had in 2021, that's the *easiest* way to lose all respect I might harbour for you, and I seldomly get mad or angry.

I am always accomodating, always supportive, and I think I have proven it aplenty in the past few years.

But this is something that I cannot condone nor agree with.

And it's not just a matter of ethic, in this sense: it's a matter of also hurting me, and literally put my whole creative process into shamble.

It's a matter of having respect of others.

Now, you might say: who cares if they hurt you? they are characters that do not exist, just move on and have thicker skin!

Well, as I said above, for when it concerns myself, my OCs are an extention of my own soul, a way for me to formulate and explain feelings that sometimes I have a hard time let out; a way for me to actually face, fragmentize and analyze my own trauma through them;

and most important of all, they are OFTEN a love letter to both the world I am exploring with them AND my own husband and child, such as in the case of Jacob and Dorothea,for whom, as I said often in the past 5 years, I have poured A LOT from myself and my husband's own story.

You could say that it probably my fault for having bared my feelings so much and poured so much of myself into a character;

And you might be correct, because I have learned my lesson, and ever since Dorothea and Jacob, no other character has been infused with as much of my own being as they were.

but that doesn't mean that it stings any less when I see it unravels in front of my eyes.

I am tired.

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

current editing moodboard, please send help

[tangents-within-tangents]

Sigh I swear the bar is so low with writing sometimes.

I’ve just been remembering how much it bothers me when there’s no lasting consequences or acknowledgement for things. When everything resets like nothing ever happened at the start of the next episode, or even the next scene sometimes. How cool and rare it was that Wally’s arm was in a cast for a whole 5 episodes of Young Justice. How relieved/excited I was when Mulder actually still had bandages on his fingers the episode after he broke them because FINALLY something carried over! Or when Hook was leaning on someone for support in the background after the fight scene in Pan. How impressed I was to see Katniss still crying hysterically for Rue a few scenes after her death. How surprised I was to actually see a hint of the effect of Echo’s extremely traumatic experience when he panicked in the medbay. How my heart soared when he insisted on rescuing Gregor because omg he’s acting in a way that makes sense for his character! Clinging to every small scrap we get to see of clones showing real emotion when so often they seemingly never bat an eye at their losses and never mention their fallen brothers again.

I love these shows I swear, but it just gets so frustrating! Like I’ll literally be so nervous no one will be affected realistically, or react like a human, or behave in-character and then I get so excited on the rare occasions they do. And then I realize wow the bar is so low, shouldn't that just be, you know, writing 101?

Like I remember some episode of some show (the Seeker? Or something idk) where a character was captured and tortured and not ten minutes after being rescued his friend was like “hmm you sure are quiet today” like YEAH I SURE HOPE HE IS?!

[furiarossa]

Sometimes (like, it happened also today, like ten minutes ago) I receive messages from complete strangers, that never ever interacted with my content, asking if I want to chat.

These make me always SO NERVOUS. For a lot of reasons. Of course I don't have the time nor the will to chat with complete strangers, so I always politely refuse, but it happened that people went angry over my polite refusal, like "do you know what the mental state of the person asking you to chat could be? What if I need this?".

Bro. Bro, no, what if you're scaring me and my mental state is already terrible and it's actually you assuming that I MUST have the will, the strength and the mental health to chat with you, complete stranger, to whom I owe nothing? Uh?

[youjustfeelthemforever]

btw how someone wants to be loved comes before how you want to love them

[thefallennightmare]

I'm just so tired.

[the-gayest-sky-kid]

aroace joy vs aroace loneliness fight

[kai-atlantis]

Pics of the cat who is now in my storage closet send help

To be fair, the carpet is softer than concrete 😅 His name is Skinny

[the-golden-dragoness]

Not crying and being guilt ridden again :))))))

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

me desperately trying to outrun my writer’s block for the fiftieth time this week

[crossover-enthusiast]

You still on about that horror thing?

people are just really fixated on those concepts man, I really don’t think there isn’t anything else to it besides that

they just like it a lot

Fair enough. As someone who is just not fixated on horror, it just. Idk it annoys me, I want to see the actual cast this game is about in funny scenarios, not them (specifically BF, GF, and maybe Pico) dying horrifically

It's like everyone else gets fifteen cakes and I get half a cherry

[civetcider]

i haven’t really drawn anything of worth in months 

[bluravenite]

slight rant/vent

Though I'm also posting on twt at @bluravenite in case you want to interact with me outside of hate anons

Yk there's probably hate anons going around all the time but it's been really apparent this past week that some people genuinely don't know to shut the fuck up... I have stopped posting with the same frequency as i was bc i am working on commissions and drawing takes time but i might just keep a more sort of closed parasocial relationship/ treat Tumblr more as a portfolio than as social media if that keeps happening... Sorry that i rant in here a lot but it's genuinely exhausting sometimes when most of your mutuals on this app are getting rude anons...

[madd-nix]

if i go to jail for strangling my brother, just know he tried to kill me first by bringing over his girlfriend 's cat all the time, knowing i'm allergic

[bethiewhimsy]

i’ve been stricken with so many problems.