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#sorry im going to reblog this a bunch over the next few days
swordsmans · 1 year
Text
ocean theology
“Zoro—”
“Did you know?” he repeats, desperate, and Luffy just looks at him. And he wonders, then, how much of this has been preordained—how much of this is real, how much of this is him. How much of what he’s felt since they were wedged side-to-side in a shitty wooden boat on the East Blue has actually mattered, and how much has been the universe pressing him down into the mold of someone else's heart.
And then Luffy is gripping his horns, bringing his forehead down to meet his, repeating, “Zoro? Zoro?” like his name is a mantra, like he’s gone somewhere far away and gotten lost on his way back.
And Zoro blinks at him, then, and sees both of them at once—both of them—and he grips Luffy’s face in his own hands (claws) and presses his lips (violent, full of teeth) against his. Because this is who he has been waiting a thousand years for, the brightest and most beautiful of them all, the one thing he could never have—could never see, not if (Luffy, Joyboy, Nika) had made different (worse) choices—the thing that could never thrive in the darkness, just like he could never (has been unable to for centuries) survive without it—
pairing: roronoa zoro/monkey d. luffy
word count: 40,565
ao3 tags: canon-compliant reincarnation; melodrama (affectionate); spoilers through the end of wano; mild body horror (horns teeth claws); it's about the Yearning and the Devotion; graphic depictions of violence; archive warnings are for violence inflicted BY the crew not ON the crew; hurt/comfort/comedy at a 30/60/10 ratio; 40k words and i forgot to write "Asura" even once
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bwabys-scenarios · 7 months
Note
Hi there you've probably seen me liking a bunch of your reunited chapters. I absolutely adore what you're doing and what you're planning on in the future!
I would like to make a request with the werewolf kurapika! (Im hoping a spelled that right)
Can we get werewolf kurapika slowly falling in love with sweet fluffy witch reader? ( you see witches in black this witch wears pastels in the highest fasion)
Its only when kurapika ends up in a rut does he realize how much he loves his little strawberry witch and that's not the rut ridden breeding obsessed brain of his talking.
So if this is alright I hope you have a wonderful day and always remind werewolf kurapika that only good boys get head pats!
A witch and her werewolf pt2
Werewolf!Kurapika x Fem!Witch!Reader
warning: spicy, Kurapika is going into rut ><
a/n: I had to split this up into another part because tumblr is being laggy, sorry! 😭🙏
!!REBLOGS APPRECIATED!!
part 1
part 3
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Kurapika watched over you as you slept, pulling your blanket to your chin. He was humming gently, petting your head much like you to him.
He didn’t understand quite why, yet, but he’d grown incredibly protective over you the past few months he’d been under your care. Kurapika enjoyed watching you, being near you, feeling your touch.
You seemed to think of him as a friend, perhaps even a pet, but Kurapika was neither. He was your protector, the only one allowed to curl up next to you in bed and give you secret kisses on the top of your head.
He couldn’t help it, gently lapping at your cheek. You grumbled in your sleep, cuddling into him further.
Kurapika rested his chin on top of your head, tail smacking against the bed as he held you. ‘Happy…’ he thought, a purr rumbling in his chest.
——————
“Pika… you gotta let me get up.”
You attempted again to wiggle out of his arms, feeling him growl lowly. Kurapika was usually very reasonable, but when it came to getting out of bed in the mornings, he became stubborn and whiny.
“Just a little longer…” he said, nuzzling his cheek against yours. “Sleepy…”
You pout but give in and scratch between his ear, earning a content sigh. “Okay, okay, but only five more minutes.”
He cooed, happily burying his face in your neck to inhale your scent. You’d gotten used to his affections, continuing to pet his head.
After the five minutes, he finally let you go, allowing you to go and bathe as he prepared breakfast. Once you were out of the bath, he was quick to rush over and sniff you, causing you to giggle. “Kurapika, don’t forget you’re cooking!”
He blinked, pulling his head away from your neck to rush back to the kitchen.
After breakfast, you go about doing your chores. You wash clothes, fix up a few potions and salves to sell, sew up a hole in one of Kurapika’s tabards, then get yourself dressed to go into town.
Kurapika always felt his eyes soften when he watched you walk out of your room. You wore the prettiest of dresses, today it was a soft pink covered in little strawberries. You grab your basket and Kurapika holds your satchel.
“Alright, Pika, let’s get going!”
He follows you around town, occasionally growling at anyone that got too close, especially those of the male variety. Another disguised werewolf attempted to get near you, only for Kurapika to quickly nuzzle into you, marking you with his scent.
‘Mine, back off.’ Kurapika says with his eyes, his teeth bared at the man. He was quick to leave, sensing Kurapika was much stronger than him.
“Hmm? Something wrong, Pika?”
He melts when you scratch under his chin to calm him down a little, the blonde shaking his head. “No, no nothing is wrong. Never when I’m with you.”
You laugh. “Okay then, let’s get the shopping done then.”
—————
Kurapika helped you put up the provisions you bought, stealing a piece of jerky, which earned him a giggle for you. “If you’re hungry I can make you something.”
He’s quick to shake his head. “No, just wanted to try it!”
You pet his head, causing his tail to wag. “Okay, okay. I’ve got work on some chores, could you hunt something for dinner?”
He jumps up, nodding. “Yeah, anything you want in particular.”
“No, get whatever is easiest for you.”
Kurapika begins undressing, handing you his tabard before pulling off his shirt. Even though he undresses every time he transforms, it still flusters you every time. He finishes, turning his head away as he folds his clothes and places them in your arms.
“Kurapika?”
He turns his head, ears perking up at your voice. “Yes?”
“Be careful, okay?”
His face turns red and he can’t help but keep forward and muzzle against you, cooing happily. “I will! You don’t have to worry about me!”
You squeak, wiggling out of his arms. “Kurapika, no, you’re naked!”
You hide your face, and his ears flatten against his head. “Oh, sorry…”
You peek at him from behind your fingers, seeing that he was pouting. “Aww, Pika… I’m not mad, come here…”
He did so, purring when you scratch under his chin. “Okay, now go before it gets too dark.”
Kurapika whined a little, but did leave. His body was still buzzing from your affection, and when he looked down, he became confused.
His cock was standing at attention, twitching. He took it in his hands, whining slightly. ‘When did I get so hard? Hope she didn’t see…’
Kurapika found a secluded part of the woods to jerk off, his mind going back to you. He thought about you petting him so gently, about the few times he’d walked in on you naked, about how cute you would look with stuffed full of his cum!
“(Name)…”
He whimpered, ears flattening as he came. “Hahh…”
Kurapika whined, watching his cum fall onto the forest floor. “Want it… inside (Name)…”
He blushed. “Why..? Why am I thinking about her like this? I…”
Kurapika had never been in love before, having dedicated his life to avenging his clan. His ceaseless mission didn’t give him much time to fall in love or even find a mate.
He dealt with his ruts alone, often coming out of them exhausted and feeling more alone than ever. A few female werewolves had attempted to woo him, but he had never been interested in them.
But now… he felt strange. Thinking about going back to you, about how you’d coo at him and tell him how good a boy he was for catching dinner, about how you’d give him forehead kisses after his nightmares and sing him to sleep… made his tummy fill with butterflies.
His heart was thumping against his chest at just the thought of you alone. His pretty little (Name), who treated him with such kindness and helped him with his mission. His tail began to wag as he thought about burying his head in your soft tummy, your hands running through his hair as you sang him a lullaby.
“Mine… she’s my (Name)…”
He made quick work of catching dinner before rushing home, stopping along the way to pick up a shiny rock that caught his eye.
You opened the door, giving him a sweet smile. “Oh, good job Kurapika! This will make some good deer stew!”
His tail thumped wildly against the door frame as you pet his head, the tall blonde leaning into your touch. He blinked, clearing his throat.
“Hmm?”
He held out the rock, his ears flattening against his head in embarrassment. “For you…”
It looked like some sort of crystal, maybe quarts. You tilted it in your hand, eyes wide with wonder. “Really? For me? Oh Pika!”
You gave him a hug, then a peck on the cheek. “This is gorgeous, thank you so much!”
His ears perked up, tail smacking against your leg. “You’re welcome!”
His cheek nuzzles his cheek against yours, holding you tight against him. ‘So happy…’
You placed it on the shelf near your bed, where you kept all of your favorite things. This made his heart soar, feeling very proud that something he gave you was now one of your cherished items.
After dinner, he tugged on your sleeve to get you to bed, wanting nothing more than to cuddle his little witch. “Haha, are you sleepy, Kurapika? Well I’m fine with going to bed early.”
The two of you cuddled in bed, the blonde next to you cooing and purring as he cuddled into your chest. “My sweet Pika, did you just need some cuddles? Aww, cute!”
You scratch between his ears, causing his tail to wag. “Goodnight, sweetheart. Sweet dreams.”
You kiss his forehead before getting comfortable and falling asleep. He stared up at your sleeping face, before scooting up and hovering close to your face.
Kurapika gently lapped at your lips, feeling himself get hard. He leaned forward and pressed his lips against yours, melting into the kiss.
When he pulled back, his red eyes couldn’t look away from you. His hand slipped down to his hard cock, gently stroking himself as he buried his face into your neck, gently lapping at your sensitive skin. You smelled so good, tasted so sweet, it didn’t take long for him to cum.
“(Name)…” he panted out, pulling you closer and whimpering into your neck. You woke up then, still half asleep you hummed, running your fingers through his hair.
“What’s wrong, Pika? Another nightmare?”
Although he didn’t like lying, he nodded, ears flattening against his head. “Aww… it’s okay, shh…”
She kissed the top of his head, pulling him into her arms. “Come here, Pika.”
He did, sighing in contentment. After his orgasm, he was feeling even more cuddlier than usual, wanting nothing more than your gentle touch.
——————
You pull on your coat, Kurapika following behind you. “Okay, I have a meeting with some of my witch friends today. You’ll be on your best behavior, right?”
You scratch under his chin, his tail wagging. “I will.”
“Good boy~”
He felt his face turn red. “I’ll grab the basket!”
Kurapika rushed away, wanting to hide how flustered he was. You tilt your head, confused. ‘Weird, I thought he loved chin scratches.’
If you were spotted somewhere, odds were Kurapika was close behind. He never let you go anywhere alone, not after you were nearly robbed at the market a few months ago.
And especially not after he’d decided on courting you.
Kurapika realized the night before that you were everything he wanted in a mate. Kind, caring, soft, and absolutely adorable. Therefore, he would begin courting you before his rut came.
The first step was gift giving, and as the two of you walked down the path to the weekly witch meeting, he would stop and pick flowers for you.
“Aww, Kurapika, thank you!”
His heart raced when you placed the flower in your basket. Kurapika was so happy you were being so receptive to his affections, cooing as he followed behind you.
The thought of his courting being a success and being able to breed you during his rut almost made him pop a boner, but he stopped himself by focusing on finding you more little gifts.
By the time you reached the meeting spot, your basket was full of gifts your werewolf companion had brought for you. “(Name)!”
He’d brought another shiny rock for you, placing it in your basket before nuzzling his cheek against yours. “Oh, Pika, it’s so pretty. But…”
You pat his arm. “I can’t fit anymore in my basket, sweetheart.”
He pouted a little, taking your basket from your hands and holding it for you. “Aww, don’t pout!”
You cooed at him, gently rubbing his tummy. He paused, his tail wagging as his pout faded into a content smile. “There, that’s my pretty Kurapika. Come on, we’ll be late if we don’t hurry.”
‘Pretty? Me?’
His cheeks turned pink, his ears twitching as you pulled him along by his hand. “Almost there. Now, you’re going to be a good boy, right? No growling at my friends?”
His ears flattened against his head as he scowled. “I’ll try…”
You sigh, squeezing his hand. “Try you best, okay? If you’re good we’ll go swimming tomorrow.”
He perked up, jogging to stand by your side. “We will? But it’s autumn. Humans can’t swim when it’s cold, correct?”
You giggle, looping your arm with his. “Well, you’ll be swimming, I’ll be collecting some mushrooms and plants that grow near there.”
He was excited, Kurapika loved swimming! And doing anything with you was fun.
It was a perfect opportunity to find more gifts for you as well! Perhaps he could catch some fish, or find pretty shells you could put in your room or ingredients for your potions! Would you pet him and tell him how good he was if he did that? Would you agree to be his mate?
“We’re here, Pika.”
You pull him a little closer. “Behave.”
That was easier said than done.
——————
You pass through a curtain of moss covering a hole in a large tree. “Hello!”
A blue haired woman sat at a table looks up, her face brightening. “(Name), it’s good to see you!”
Kurapika hesitantly allows you to let go of him and if the woman, holding himself back from growling. “Menchi! How have you been? I heard you’ve been busy lately, I haven’t seen you in months.”
The woman grinned, patting her satchel. “I found a lot of good stuff on my journey to the north. I brought a few things for you today. In exchange for your homemade cherry blossom syrup, of course.”
You giggle, gesturing for Kurapika to carry your basket over. “Of course, here you are!”
You hand Menchi the jar, receiving a pouch of herbs in exchange. “Ooo, these are rare? Are you sure just one jar of syrup is enough?”
Menchi nods, squeezing your cheek. “It’s plenty. You make the best around, after all.”
Kurapika tugs on your sleeve, causing the blue haired woman to frown. “(Name), your mutt stinks. Has it bathed recently?”
The blonde growled, you silencing him by gently scratching under his chin. “Menchi, be nice. He takes a bath every day, and he smells fine. Right Pika?”
He hummed in response, happy to have your attention on him. ‘But you smell a lot better…’
Menchi rolled her eyes, opening the curtain behind her. “Go ahead, then. The meeting is about to start.”
They walked through an arch way, revealing a field of flowers, with large toadstools serving as seating. Several witches, of various ages and genders loitered around the place, eating snacks or practicing spells.
“(Name)!”
One of the young apprentice witches ran towards you, clinging to your skirt. “Alluka! If you’re here, then that means-“
“Hello.”
Killua, a white haired witch said from above. You looked up to see him perched in one of the cherry blossom trees, tipping his witch hat at you. “Brought the dog again? Can’t wait to see what he does this time.”
“I won’t do anything…” Kurapika said, hand gripping your sleeve.
“Yeah and I have curly pink hair.”
You gather Alluka into your arms, laughing. “He’s going to be good today. After all, the queen said he had one last chance before he’s banned.”
Kurapika stiffened at your side. ‘Forgot about that…’
Last time, an older male witch had flirted with you, being a bit too handsy. While this was not allowed, Kurapika changing into his wolf form and mauling the man was not allowed either.
Given that he was only defending his witch as your familiar, he wasn’t held liable, but was told that doing something like that again would get him banned.
“Is Gon coming?”
“He’s already here, but you know him, he’s searching for Kite.”
Kurapika scowled as Alluka pulled on his ears, laughing. “Aww, your puppy is so soft, (Name)! It’s not often you see a witch with a werewolf as a familiar!”
You perk up a little, clearing your throat. “Well, I’m lucky he agreed to be my familiar. Kurapika is not only my familiar, but my dear friend. He’s saved me countless times, and I’m happy to have him in my life.”
The blonde blushed under your praise, his tail wagging. Killua made a gagging motion. “Ew, I think you need to get your mutt neutered (Name).”
The blonde growled. “Watch your mouth, Killua. I’ll come up there and-“
“Kurapika!”
The blondes ears flattened, whining slightly at your raised voice. You set Alluka down, allowing her and Killua to run off towards your other friends. “Pika, you promised you’d be good. I don’t want to have to leave you outside the barrier, but I will.”
You cup his cheeks, the blonde continuing to whine. “It’s hard to be good when everyone here treats me like an outsider, or some pet.”
“I know, I know. They’re just not used to seeing a werewolf as a familiar. There’s only been a handful of them in the history of witchcraft, and… I’m the only witch that has survived the first month of it.”
The blonde blinked, pulling back. “… survived?”
You now. “Yes, the others were either killed by their own familiar, or hunted down by poachers to take their werewolves pelt.”
Kurapika pulled you closer, rubbing his face into your neck to make sure you smelled like him. “I wouldn’t kill you, wouldn’t even hurt you, ever.”
“I know, I know. I’m sure the witches made those werewolves their familiars using… unethical means. It’s hard to feel sorry for them. We formed a partnership without the use of spells or magic, meaning it was consensual for both of us. But some witches…” you sigh, petting him.
“I don’t know a lot about werewolves, but they’re very misunderstood. People assume they’re beasts incapable of thinking, only wanting to kill. But I know that’s not true.”
You plant a few kisses on the top of his head, feeling him purr against your neck. “You’re intelligent, kind, and carrying. My sweet Kurapika would never hurt me, I know that.”
He looked up at you, really taking your face in. He’d never heard someone say these things about his kind, always being told he was a monster, that no one besides a fellow beast would ever love him.
And here you were, proving them wrong.
“Come, Pika. It’s time.”
He nodded slowly, giving you one last squeeze before sitting with you as the queen of your witch colony walked onstage.
“Hello witches! Who’s ready for this months meeting?”
Bisky, a woman the age of 560 that could pass for 12 asked, her blonde pigtails bouncing as she walked.
——————
Kurapika slept soundly with his head on your lap as you chatted with some friends after the meeting. The topic of your familiar came up again, Neon, a young blue haired witch tutting.
“You’ve heard the rumors haven’t you, (Name)? Every witch with a wolf familiar has died a month into their partnership.”
You roll your eyes. “That’s because their bond was made using black magic, causing the poor familiars soul to be corrupted. Instead of protecting their witch, they killed them.”
Neon nodded. “Yes, but they say that werewolves aren’t typically so friendly with humans regardless! And that’s not just a rumor, it’s true. They stick to themselves, avoiding humans. The way he acts with you is… not normal.”
You look down at Kurapika, who was nuzzling into your tummy in his sleep. “Not… normal?”
“Yes, I’ve never seen a case like this.”
The two of you jump when Bisky sits between you two. “Madam Bisky!”
The woman coos at you, pinching your cheek. “How is my beloved (Name) and her wolfy familiar doing?”
You pout, petting Kurapika’s head absentmindedly. “We’re doing fine, he’s even been bringing gifts to me lately.”
Bisky raises an eyebrow. “… gifts?”
“Mhm, like shiny rocks and flowers. It started yesterday.”
Bisky hummed, reaching out to touch (Name), but pulling back when Kurapika growled in his sleep. “Hmm… and you said he sleeps in your bed with you?”
“Of course, as most familiars do. It’s a good way to bond.”
The blonde girl sighs. “I see. Neon, could you leave us for a moment? I need to speak with (Name) alone.”
The girl attempts to argue, but with a look from Bisky she leaves. Once she’s out of earshot, Bisky sighs. “My dear, your familiar may… be attempting to court you.”
“Court..?”
Bisky snapped her fingers, a book appearing out of thin air and falling into her lap. She opened it up, flipping to a page. “Courting is the process werewolves undergo to woo a potential…”
She glanced down to the blonde sleeping in your lap, you purred as he held you close. “Mate.”
Your face heats up, pulling your hand away from the blonde lying in your lap. He whines and begins to stir, and Bisky gestures for you to continue petting him. You do, and she lets out a relieved sigh.
“Yes. Werewolves choose a mate to spend their lives with once they turn 18, but because Kurapika’s clan was wiped out and he’s been trying to avenge his clan, he hasn’t had the time to choose one.”
You look down at your sweet Pika, running your fingers through his hair. “You must be mistaken, Bisky, he doesn’t view me that way. He’s affectionate, of course, but aren’t werewolves just like that?”
Bisky frowned. “In fact they’re not. They are only as affectionate as Kurapika is with you when they’re with family or their mate.”
You fidget a bit, becoming flustered. “… maybe he was separated from his mother too soon? Dogs that-“
“Kurapika is not a dog, (Name). He may seem like it sometimes, but Kurapika is as human as you or me, only having wolf like qualities and anatomy.”
You pout, causing Bisky to sigh. “I know you want to treat him like a cute puppy, but he’s not. He’s a man, a dangerous and powerful one at that. And…”
She flips a page. “Werewolves mate for life. If you are not interested in it, he may leave to find a mate.”
You jump, eyes widening. “Leave? But I don’t want him to! He’s…”
You tear up a little, sniffling. Almost as if can sense your change in mood, Kurapika snuggles into your tummy gently, kissing at your soft flesh in his sleep. You look down at him, smiling and scratching between his ears.
Bisky clears her throat. “It could be possible he just views you as a family member due to the familiar bond, but…”
She watches as Kurapika’s cheeks turn pink, his tail wagging lazily. “… anyways, I just wanted you to be aware of this. What you choose to do is your own business.”
“Family… maybe that’s what it is. I… I don’t think he’d see me as someone to… um… mate with.”
Bisky sighs. ‘Oh dear, it seems she’s still as insecure as she was when I found her as a child.’
“Regardless, try to keep a tab on his behavior. He may seem like your sweet puppy, but werewolves become dangerous when protecting their mate. Especially…”
“Madam Bisky, you’re needed in the 7th Sector!”
She groaned. “I’ll have to leave, but please come visit me next week when I come back. We’ll talk more then. For now…”
She patted the girls head. “Be careful.”
Kurapika stirs a few minutes after Bisky leaves, looking up at you with sleepy red eyes. “Mmm… is the meeting over?”
You nod, pushing his hair out of his face. He nuzzled against your hand, and you sigh. “Yes. We should be getting home soon.”
He stands, helping you up before stretching. “Would you like me to carry you, (Name)?”
You nod, and watch in fascination as he transforms into his wolf form. Even now, he gently nuzzles against you, purring as you scratch between his big ears. “Let’s get home, Pika.”
You jump onto his back, waving goodbye to your friends before taking off.
——————
Kurapika wakes up early the next morning to get ready for your trip to the lake, preparing a picnic basket and packing towels and a change of clothes for himself.
“Mmm, you’re up early. Too excited?”
You walk into the kitchen, rubbing his tummy, causing him to pause and purr. “Yes, you could say that.”
He places his hand over yours, eyes half lidded as he gently guides your hand lower. “K-Kurapika?”
He stops right above his crotch, ears flattening as a blush settles over his face. “Rub here?”
And you do, careful not to go any lower. He cooed and purred the entire time, dropping to his knees after to bury his face in your tummy. “(Name)…”
The second part of courting was giving your potential mate affection, along with showing them how good of a mate you would be. He was too shy to actually ask you to go lower, feel his bulge and how big he was so you would know he could satisfy you. It was something werewolf males did with females, but Kurapika knew humans were… different. He didn’t want to scare you off!
He followed behind you, carrying your things for you and growling at anything that came to close. When a crow demon attempted to jump out and harm you, he defeated it easily. Kurapika was now attached to your hip, looking over your body to make sure you were okay.
“I’m fine, come on.”
You huffed, pulling him along the path until the two of you reached the lake.
Kurapika helped you set out the picnic blanket before racing towards the water, throwing off his clothes and transforming. You giggle as you watch him dive into the water, his pretty golden fur shining in the sun.
As he swims, you walk around the lake, placing mushrooms, moss, and spider lilies into your satchel. You hum to yourself, jumping when you hear the water next to you shift.
Fortunately, it was just Kurapika, who carried a large fish in his mouth, dropping it at your feet.
‘For my (Name). I’m a good mate, I can provide you with all the food you need.’ He thought to himself, looking up at you with his pretty red eyes. You coo, petting his furry head.
“Aww, Kurapika, you’re so sweet. This will be perfect for dinner tonight.”
You kiss the top of his head, and he nuzzles his large head against you. “H-hey! You’re still wet, Pika!”
———————
The final stage of the courting process had begun, and Kurapika’s rut was only a day away. He left you home alone for the first time since he’d become your familiar to go to town alone.
‘These are perfect…’ he thought, grabbing the plush blankets and furs. He paid the shop owner before stuffing the materials into his pack. He gathered many soft things including stuffed animals, blankets, furs, and pillows.
‘Need her favorite snacks and drinks too…’
He perused the farmers market, packing food into the basket he borrowed.
You waited at home, sewing up a hole in one of his tabards. ‘He hasn’t left me alone in months… I hope…’
You remembered Bisky’s words. ‘He may leave to find a mate.’
Your heart ached, tears beading at your eyes. ‘I… I don’t want him to leave me…’
You’d gotten used to having Kurapika in your life, his presence making you feel safe and loved.
‘Loved? Do I…’
You blush, jumping up from your chair and rushing to the bathroom to splash some cool water in your face. The sound of the front door opening makes you jump. “(Name)?”
You hear Kurapika yell your name, the sound of him dropping something and sprinting through your home making you squeak. “(Name)!”
He throws open the bathroom door, eyes wide with worry. “Pika, I’m right here.”
He sighs, pulling you into his arms and gently rubbing his chest and head against you to cover him in his scent. “I couldn’t see you, (Name). I… I was scared that you were hurt or taken just like…”
‘Just like his clan.’ you thought, cupping his cheeks and nuzzling your nose against his. “Shh, I know, it’s okay Pika. I’m right here, puppy.”
His eyes shoot open at the pet-name, his tail wagging. “Puppy?”
“Yes, my puppy~” you coo, giving him a peck on his cheek. He melts, beginning to purr and nuzzle against you, his arms wrapping around your waist.
“I’ll be your puppy, (Name). Yours, and only yours.”
He kisses your forehead before pulling away. “I have a surprise for you, okay? Stay out here until I’m done.”
You giggle, nodding. “Alright, I’ll be reading. Take your dinner with you, okay?”
————————
Night falls, and Kurapika can feel his body beginning to heat up. ‘It’s starting soon… almost done!’
He looks over his work, nodding. ‘It’s done.’
The blonde peeled his head out of your bedroom door. “(Name), it’s ready!”
You look up from your book, smiling. “Coming!”
Whne you open the door, you gasp. “Kurapika!”
Your bed was covered in soft furs, pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals. He had made a nest for the two of you, standing next to it. “Do you… like it?”
“It’s amazing! It looks so soft!”
His chest swells with pride when you curl up in his nest, rolling around a little before sitting on the edge of your bed. You were about to thank him, but you were stopped when his lips crashed into yours, pushing you back down onto the bed. “So happy… so happy you like it, little one.”
He doesn’t give you a chance to speak, kissing you again, his hand traveling up your shirt to cup your breasts. He shoves his tongue in your mouth, and you can feel his tail thwacking against your leg.
“K-Kurapika, what are you-“ you try to say when he pulls away so you can breathe, but he’s already moving to your neck, sucking and nipping at your sensitive skin.
“(Name)… my angel…”
He gazes up at you, face flushed and a soft pant leaving his lips. “I want you… I wanna breed you until you’re carrying my puppies…”
His rut was making him incapable of sugarcoating things, his lips returning to your neck. “B-breed? You…”
‘Bisky was right, he was courting me!’
You mewled when his hand moved down to slip under your shorts, rubbing your clit your panties. “Hahh, Pika!”
He pulled away from your neck, kissing you again. “Will you be mine, (Name)? Mate with me for life?”
You look at him, the familiar fuzzy feeling you felt earlier returning. You were in love him, and had been trying to suppress your feelings by pretending he was just a familiar to you.
“Yes, Kurapika. I’m yours, puppy.”
Tears fill his eyes, and he can’t help but crash his lips into yours again. “Thank you… I’ll take care of you, okay? Keep you safe and love you forever.”
And as you feel his cock harden against your leg, you begin to understand he means he’ll take care of you in more ways than one….
TO BE CONTINUED IN PART 3
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steveandstave · 2 years
Text
a little motivation
professor!steve x gn!reader (mostly) (implications of fem!reader at the end, but can be ignored)
warnings: 18+ mdni i will fold you like a chair :) oral (m receiving), slight degradation, i think that's all let me know
wc: 1.4k
beta read and requested by : @steveharringtonscarkeys
a/n: please like this lol. i will cry lmao. this is my first smut fic also lower case intended. please reblog, likr or comment!
you hear all the lovely stories about making friends while you’re away at college, all the parties you’ll go to, how your classes are so much different from your shitty high school ones. what they don’t tell you is, how much you struggle when you’re paying for everything on your own. so, when i got twenty-two credit hours on my fall semester schedule, i knew i was in deep shit. you try working two jobs and still having a bunch of work to do when you get off your shift. it seemed like your only saving grace was your oral communications class. taught by one of the hottest teachers on campus.
the first few interactions with mr. harrington is what you would expect between a teacher and their student, simple, and short. at least that was until you confided in him, possibly still drunk from the night before, about how you were looking for another job, to hopefully have some of your own money to spend, outside of the tuition you were paying. mr. harrington offered the idea of being his assistant, most of what you would be doing would be grading papers, doing coffee runs and helping him sort through all of his filing cabinets for course materials, it sounded like it was an easy job, so you took it. it seemed like your other jobs scheduled you for more days as soon as you took the job, not only were you missing his class, but you also had a crap ton of papers you had to grade. not to mention any in class work that was supposed to be turned in couldn’t be redone.
after speeding to campus, you got to his class with a few minutes to spare. you sat down at the first chair available and pulled out your notebook and a pen, class went on as usual, a few discussions, mostly note taking and silence unless he was talking. once class was dismissed, you packed up your belongings and started to walk towards the door until your name was called. mr. harrington stood next to the white board with a marker in his hand. “i think we need to have a talk. could you have a seat in my office please?” it felt like your stomach fell on the floor when he said that, without an answer you walked to his office and sat in your usual spot and a few moments later he came in and closed his door. “you’ve been missing class a lot recently; it’s been tanking your grade a little. it states in the syllabus that any work completed in class cannot be made up, i’m sure you’ve read that though. so, what’s going on?” he had his arms crossed over his chest, leaning against his desk. was it wrong to be turned on by this? sure you flirted with him from time to time, but it never went anywhere beyond a soft blush against his cheek and a laugh.
keeping eye contact with him was going to be the hardest thing ever. every time you looked at him you, your stomach turned, and you couldn’t help but rub your thighs together. you opened your mouth to speak, praying your voice wouldn’t be meek and small, “since i took up the assistant job you offered me, my other jobs have scheduled me during class time.” you licked your lips and averted your eyes from his gaze. “if i don’t come in, i get fired and im not exactly in the position to be without my job and i’m sorry for missing class i just- “he interrupted you, standing up from his previous position, hands now in his pockets “look, i understand your position., but you’re missing notes from several chapters we’ve gone over in this class. you don’t exactly have the time to catch up. i need you to do better” it felt like you were being scolded by your father, your head hung low with your hands in your lap, you knew you were one of his favorite students and you thought maybe kissing up would get you a little leeway in this. “yes mr. harrington... anything for you” you looked at him walk to his office door and lock it. “i don’t wanna hear that, you know that won’t work with me you gotta work for it, you got that sweetheart?” now he’s standing in front of you, hands still in his pocket, chewing on his lip. “i think you just need a little motivation, yeah” you couldn’t avert your gaze from him now, he stood next to you in your chair, hand lazily wrapped around the nape of your neck, hard on almost pressed against your face. “i think i can give you some motivation”
it was like your body moved on your own, sliding down on your knees to sit on your heels, head pushed backward, waiting on your next command. you felt like a dog waiting for its owner to bark out another order. Looking at your professor in this angle, him towering over you as if he were a god, maybe in this moment he was, one of his chiseled arms hanging by his side as the other moved towards his belt, taking it off as slow as he could. He had a smirk plastered across his face, “i’ve never seen you this eager for anything, baby. You want my cock, don’t you?” you nodded your head and tried to speak, but nothing but a whine came out. “oh no, I need your words honey.” You felt your cheeks heat up, sure you had a few sexual experiences, but this felt different, you felt like putty in his hands, you knew he had control over your ever move, your every thought, in this moment you were his. “I want your cock in my mouth mr. harrington.” after what seemed like years, he took his belt off and unbuckled his pants, sliding his pants down just enough so his bulge could be pulled out from his boxers with no problem. You couldn’t help but lick your lips at the sight, he had a small wet patch right where his tip was. You sat up on your knees and pressed a kiss to his tip, pulling his boxers down, letting his length spring back against his lower stomach.
you must have died and gone to heaven, his cock was the prettiest you had ever seen, thick and long, paler towards the base and bright red at his tip, a prominent vein on the underside leading right to his slit. You felt like you could cum just by looking at it. Not wanting to waste anymore time, you took his dripping tip in your mouth, swirling your tongue around it bobbing your head slowly. “fuck. I knew your mouth was good for something” you saw his hand move to your head, holding it steady. you quickly got to work, taking most of him in your mouth, surprising yourself and him, one of your hands rested against his thighs to keep yourself steady and the other cradling his heavy balls. he was bucking into your mouth, making you gag, your throat slightly closing around him. “ah baby, if you do that again i'll cum down your throat.” you looked up at him, head still bobbing, giving him a soft hum around his cock as a response. You hollowed out your cheeks, feeling him twitch in your mouth, you knew he was close. You slowly pulled back and started jerking him off, hand twisting around his length as you moved your mouth down to put one of his balls in your mouth, never breaking eye contact with him as you suckled on his balls after a few moment you popped off, your hand still pumping his leaking cock “ can you cum for me mr.harrington, please?” you say looking at him with the most innocent look you could muster. you knew you looked filthy, precum and spit spread around your lips, the sounds your hand made as you tugged at his cock were sinful. you wrapped your lips around his length and bobbed your head, gagging each time you went past what was comfortable. “shit, im cumming” his words were jumbled together and rushed, soon after his sentence, you felt his cock twitch again as ropes of his cum sliding down your throat, humming around him as he came. you pulled off and showed him his cum pooled on your tongue before you swallowed it all with a smile. you wiped your face and slowly stood up, knees a little weak from kneeling for so long, your own arousal slick and sticky around your thighs. panting, leaning against his desk, a smirk plastered across his face when you spoke. “i don’t think i'm motivated enough, sir.”
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allylikethecat · 5 months
Note
ally!!!!! i’ve always loved You Know Where the City Is but wow this is the best chapter by far! like i’ve gone from obsessed to mega ultra double obsessed. everyone talking about wrapping fic!matty in a bunch of blankets and feeding him some soup is so real- you always manage to make the most cozy sweetie pie characters no matter what the fic is about. (it goes without saying that fic! taylor much like the real deal is just perfect and i love her)
counting down the chapters till we meet fic!george. so intrigued to see how there relationship will play out since you said it might not be what we expect…. love a good surprise!!!!
im practically bursting with excitement to read the christmas fic and any of the prompts you have been working on but good things take time! please don’t feel rushed to give us new content you already do so much for the sickfic matty community lmao.
hope you have a happy holiday break🥹 sending love always (also don’t be alarmed if i reblog the majority of your prompts on here soon- i have such a bad habit of liking a fic and then scrolling past it once i’ve read it so i need to go back and hunt for them all and actually save them for next time)
Ahhh thank you SO MUCH for this lovely ask omg, and thank you so much for always being so lovely, and kind and supportive 🥰 I apologize this took me a few days to respond to- I usually try and respond to asks on my laptop because I find them easier to formate and alas I had not been back on desktop Tumblr until now.
I'm so, so, so happy to hear that you enjoyed the newest chapter of You Know Where the City Is! I went back and forth on that chapter a lot (an original draft included a trip to Target lol) but I'm really pleased with how it came out and am glad that other people like it as well! Fictional!Matty (and Fictional!Taylor) could REALLY use a hug oh my gosh. They are both going through it and the worst part is they don't even realize how unwell they all 🥺 Fictional!George will be making his appearance very soon! All I can say is that Fictional!Matty is an unreliable source of information 👀 I hope people end up liking how it plays out!
I'm so excited about the Holidays fics but WOW I hope I can actually finish them in time! I haven't even finished the first one yet and I feel like the holidays are getting closer and closer faster and faster 😩 one second is was the beginning of November and now suddenly it's the end of December?! Who allowed this to happen!? I'm behind on the little schedule I made for myself- but hopefully I'll get them both done! Of course my plot bunnies are like "ummm Ally we have all the inspiration for this completely unrelated project!!!" and I'm over here like "not NOW"
We will hopefully be back to our regularly scheduled prompt fulfillment and sickfic programing after the holidays! I'm sorry about the delay, I know people are looking forward an end of SATVB / IV situation fic and I promise I am working on one!! Alas I have just also been really busy with real life.
Thank you so much for the love and I hope you have the most wonderful holidays as well! If you're ever looking for all of the prompt fills I have filled - they can be found here!
Thank you so much again for your kind words, for reading my fics and for your support! You are just so lovely and I am so grateful for your kindness! I hope you are having a wonderful night / day and will hopefully have some more fic ready soon!
❤️Ally
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shortprince-cos · 3 years
Text
More Truths Than Dares
Summary: After "The Double Closet Incident" as Patton so calls it, Patton and Janus have a talk at their friends' sleepover.
Ship: Moceit (Patton x Janus)
Warnings: Smoking, claustrophobia mention, truth or dare. Tell me if I need to add anything else!
Note: This is a direct sequel to "In A Closet"! You can read this without reading that, but it'll probably be confusing!
{Previous}
{Masterlist} (I KNOW I NEED TO FIX IT BUT IM A PROCRASTINATOR FIGHT ME)
~~~~~
"Oh, I didn't know he was invited."
All Patton had done was walk in the door. He hadn't even said hi, or hugged Roman yet, he just walked in the door, and Janus was already on his back for just existing in his presence.
It was going to be a long night.
"Yes? He's my best friend, you know!" Roman defended as he brought Patton to sit on the couch with him and Logan.
"Wow, rude." Logan said.
Roman made a series of offended noises. "You're my boyfriend! So obviously Patton is my best friend!"
As the two quickly dissolved into playful banter, Patton stood to go put his overnight bag in Roman's room, hearing Janus whisper something to Remus and Virgil as he walked by.
Just ignore it, he thought, not really in the mood to argue today. Especially not after what Patton had dubbed ‘The Double Closet Incident’.
It was disastrous. Not only did Patton get locked in a closet with Janus, who has claustrophobia, he discovered that he may have a thing for men. Who knew?
Roman. Roman probably knew, especially after he had adopted Patton into their little friend group. And if being gay was a contest, Roman would be the judge.
But...it was normal to feel that way, right? It wasn't weird to feel embarrassed when someone got up in your personal space, was it? It wasn't abnormal to blush when someone said kind words to you, or odd to imagine yourself in different scenarios with someone you saw on a daily basis and they were-
Wait, what was he doing again?
Patton sighed as he set down his bag by Roman's bed. Those were thoughts for another day. He was supposed to be having fun at his best friend's sleepover, after all!
Patton put on a happy face and went back to the living room to join the others, finding that Roman and Remus were wrestling over something, Logan and Janus were debating, and Virgil was scrolling on his phone. Yep, it was going to be a long night.
---
After breaking up Roman and Remus' tussle, watching a couple of movies, and other various shenanigans, Remus decided to gather everyone up in his room to play truth or dare.
If Patton learned anything from watching the others' turns, it was to always choose truth when Remus picks you.
"Double D, Truth or Dare?" Remus asked excitedly, even though he already knew what Janus would say.
"Dare."
Remus grinned like a shark. "I dare you and Patton to stay in my closet for one hour together."
Both Janus and Patton went pale.
"I...lied. I meant truth." Janus quickly said, hoping that Remus would let up.
"Nope! Too late! Now, you and Patton have to get in there, have hate sex or something, and come out in an hour!"
"Uh- we can't!" Patton exclaimed suddenly, and then all eyes were on him.
"What, are you afraid of the dark or something?" Remus teased.
"Um- no- well, kinda- but no. I- uh- have claustrophobia."
Janus looked shocked, to say the least. Thankfully, everyone was still looking at Patton.
"Yeah, small spaces are absolute torture to be in, and I would prefer it if none of us did stuff that involves small spaces, because then I'll worry about them!" Patton rambled quickly, trying to get all attention on him.
Remus rolled his eyes. "Ugh, fine. But you guys still need to do something together."
Patton blushed a bit, and Janus sighed, looking relieved.
Eventually, Remus gave up, and just dared Janus to eat shaving cream.
The rest of the night went smoother, and Patton ended up telling a lot of weird secrets, but not very important ones.
Eventually, everyone was asleep in either Roman's room, or Remus' room. Everyone except Patton, who couldn't get his brain to turn off.
Patton reluctantly got out of his sleeping bag, and made his way to the front door, maybe some fresh air would clear his mind.
Turns out, he wasn't the only one who had that idea, because as he stepped outside, he found the one and only Janus on the porch, smoking a cigarette.
Before Patton could turn back around, Janus saw him, and nodded his head in acknowledgment. Well, no going back now.
Patton silently sat down in the wooden rocking chair next to where Janus was standing, staring off into space a little before speaking up.
"You-you know that smoking is bad for you, right?"
Janus' lips curled up in a small smile as he chuckled. "I'm aware. Don't worry your pretty head, I only do it when I'm stressed."
Patton decided to ignore the way being called pretty by Janus felt and focused on the other part of that statement. "What are you stressed about?"
Janus blew out a puff of smoke, and suddenly Patton was very distracted by his lips.
"You. You're...different than how I thought you'd be." Janus said solemnly, drawing in another breath.
"Is...is that a bad thing?" Patton asked quietly, looking down to the floor.
Janus glanced at Patton with an indecipherable look on his face. "To be honest? I don't know. On one hand, you're actually a decent person."
"Thank you?"
"And on the other," Janus continued. "I've treated you like s**t for no reason other than spite."
"...It's okay-"
"It's not." Janus interrupted.
They sat in silence for awhile, trying to figure out if the other still wanted them here or not.
"Why did you think I was a bad person?" Patton asked quietly.
Janus huffed. "It's complicated."
"I mean...we got all night."
"...true." Janus sighed. "I think it's because ‘nice’ people don't usually want anything to do with me, and when they do, it's usually for the wrong reasons." He explained. "So when you started talking to me...I don't know, you reminded me of all the wrong people."
Patton's heart broke. He reminded Janus of some probably terrible memories, and had probably been hurting him just by being around him! No wonder Janus frowned whenever Patton walked in a room!
"Janus, I'm so so sorry, I never knew-"
"What are you sorry for?"
"I- That I remind you of some terrible people in your life-"
"Patton," Janus rest a hand on Patton's shoulder, making him blush. "You don't have any control over who you remind me of. Please, don't apologize for that."
"Well- then you can't apologize for being reminded of those people either!" Patton argued.
"I didn't say that, I said I was sorry for treating you terribly!"
"Well, then, I guess you're forgiven!" Patton retorted.
Janus looked at him in shock, as if Patton had just said a bunch of profanities, before quickly looking back to stare off into the distance again. His cheeks were red, but Patton convinced himself that he was probably cold out here.
"You're...too forgiving." Janus mumbled softly, as if he was talking to himself.
"I think that's a good thing." Patton replied.
Janus huffed. "...Thank you." He said, looking at Patton with a small smile on his face. "For everything."
Patton blushed. "Y-Yeah. No problem."
Janus looked at him with a disagreeing look on his face, but let it go.
They settled into comfortable silence as Janus threw his cigarette away and Patton almost fell asleep.
The second time Patton had to force his head up, Janus huffed.
"You should probably get to sleep."
As if on cue, Patton yawned. "So should you." He said sleepily, rubbing his eyes.
Janus chuckled. "Fine. I'll go back to bed if you do."
"Okay, fine. You have a deal."
Janus had that stupid, self-satisfied smirk on his face that he usually wore that made Patton feel fuzzy inside.
"Good," He smirked. "See you in the morning."
"Yeah. See ya."
Janus ventured into the house, Patton following a few moments later.
Patton felt like he was getting into dangerous territory with Janus, but instead of feeling concerned, he felt more excited than ever.
~~~~~
Hi guys!!!! Its been awhile! So, this is an au that ive fallen in love with, so i wanna keep writing for it! If you guys have any name ideas, send em my way please!
General Taglist: @resident-crow-goth @macademmia @theantisocialghost @foreverfangirlalways @emo--nightmaree @moxy--sanders101 @quinnthequeer @gattonero17 @trashno0dles @tranquil-space-ninja @chaotic-murder-muffin @lugooble @sander-crossing @princess-rosie @sleepyysoot @hi-its-tutty @lookingforaplacetosleep @sarcasmremovedsoul @corkeecoderyt @drarrymalecsolangelo @private-snippers @girl-who-reads @emy-loves-you @reptilian-with-scallions
Ask to be added or removed!
Reblogs are appreciated!💖
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nahoyaglock · 3 years
Text
↬ BEACH DATE
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bf!bakugou x fem!reader, fluff, 1.7k words
A/N! i did not reread or fix anything in here, so im so sorry abt bad grammar or spelling errors or smth. inspired by jj (@prettysetterbaby) and her answer to what her dream date is, say thank you jj
"spending my day up at a beach house, eating out to some nice sushi or something and spending the day shopping and eventually relaxing on the beach <333" — JJ
likes and reblogs are very appreciated !!!
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you planned on spending a day with your boyfriend, katsuki. you swung your arms as you waited on the porch of your boyfriends house, watching him slip his shoes on through his open door. once he finished, he grabbed his bag and exited his house, locking the door behind him after shouting a "goodbye" to his mom.
you hopped on one foot excitedly as you linked arms with katsuki, him sending you a cocky grin. "you ready to have the best day ever princess?" he asked, leaning down to place a kiss on your forehead.
"any day with you is the best day ever." you stated and nudged him with your elbow. he rolled his eyes playfully and chuckled. "god, your so cheesy."
you guys arrived at the subway station and took seats next to the window. katsuki wrapped his arm around you and pulled you close to him, moving his hand up to play with your hair. katsuki knew it would be a while till you guys got to your stop, so he let you relax against his figure and even take a small nap.
he made sure to make sure you didnt mess up your light makeup, knowing you'd be upset since you left your makeup at home, or fixing your hair whenever you shifted so it wouldn't get tangled. after almost 2 hours of riding, you felt a light shake of your arm, and slowly sat up.
you went to wipe your face but felt katsukis arms stop you. "don't ruin your makeup princess." he said and you giggled tiredly, still trying to shake off the sleep as he helped you stand. "thanks katsu." you yawned and he dragged you out the subway train so you didn't miss the open doors.
katsuki pulled out a water bottle and handed it to you and you took it, taking small sips. you smiled as you screwed the top back on, placing it in his bag and taking his hand in yours. "my katsu is so caring, huh?" you ask, turning to see your boyfriends slightly pink cheeks.
"yeah, whatever." he mumbled and patted your head, earning a giggle. "you wanna eat first?" he asked as you guys stepped out of the subway station. it was a bit of a walk to the pier, so you guys had small conversation.
you linked your arm with his and looked up at him, "yeah, lets get some, uh.. oh! sushi!" you bounced and shot a big smile at your boyfriend, one he just couldn't refuse. "fine, you crazy woman," he patted your head and shot you a smirk, "my woman." you rolled your eyes and walked closer to your boyfriend, slightly leaning against him.
the sun beat down on you two as you made your way to the pier, eventually arriving. you felt the cool breeze from the ocean, versus the heat from the summer sun, it was refreshing. you two walked down the pier to find a place to eat, one that had sushi of course. "oh, katsu!" you called tugging on your boyfriends arm and pointing to a restaurant.
he turned his head and smiled in the direction of the restaurant. "good eye babe." he held your hand and you two entered the restaurant. after waiting for a waiter to lead you to your table, katsuki shot you a smile. "someone looks mighty happy huh?"
you kicked his leg under the table with a giggle. "of course, who wouldn't when they're with their favorite boy at a sushi restaurant." you stated and reached over to oinch katsukis slightly tinted cheeks. "someones turning red~" you teased and earned a scoff from the ash blonde sitting across from you.
"yeah, whatever woman." he rolled his eyes as the waiter came over to take your orders, and after a few minutes of waiting, your food was served and you two dug in. "hey babe." katsuki caught your attention, looking at you with a sort of blank expression. "hmm, what is it katsu?" you asked as you took a sip of your drink. "i was just thinking, do you want to do a bit of shopping before we go to the beach? theres alot of nice shops on the pier." he said and took a bite of his food.
you smiled and nodded at him, "of course id wanna shop, why? was there something you wanted to get?" you asked, raising a brow at him with a smile. he nodded and took a sip of his drink before replying. "shark tooth necklace." he said with a smirk.
you groaned and rolled your eyes playfully. your eyes kinda hurt from how many times you've done that today. "i should've known." you chuckled out, continuing to eat. he furrowed his brows slightly, watching you with a small frown. "is there something wrong with that." his expression made you almost frown at how upset he looked.
"oh my katsu! i didn't mean it like that!" i nearly shouted, cupping his face and placing a small kiss to his lips. "i just meant that i should've known its something you'd want! its actually really cute." you say and search his face for any change in expression.
hos lips turn up into a playful smiled as he lets out a laugh, "i know shitty woman, i was just messing." your jaw dropped as he took another bite of his food. you sit back and cross your arms glaring at him. "first thing im buying is some boxing gloves."
after your meal, you guys split the bill and head out to explore the shops on the pier. you find a cute little flower shop, some surfboard stands, lots and lots of food places, and a small gift shop. a few other stores too, but those were the ones you guys visited.
katsuki looked around the gift shop for a shark tooth necklace as you toyed with anything that caught your eyes. you found some cute earings, shark week magazines, snacks– you made sure to grab a bag of chips and some gummies –and other stuff.
you were about to pass up the necklace section till something caught your eye. a shark tooth necklace! you made sure to grab it and find katsuki. as you ran up to him, surprising him with a backhug, you held your hand infront of his face, letting the necklace dangle infront of his face.
"wha- babe!" he said and grabbed the necklace, looking at it with an excited smile. he turned to you and kissed you, holding you close by your waist. you were shocked by his sudden action, but when he pulled away you chuckled and smacked his chest with your palm. "damn katsuki, you really wanted it that bad?" you ask.
he chuckles and nodded at you. he lifted his hand and mimicked the way you dangled the necklace, but in his hand was a cute jellyfish plushie. you squeaked and grabbed it, looking down at it with a wide smile. "thought my princess would like this, hmm?" he asked and you hugged him.
after buying your items, plus a bunch of random snacks katsuki grabbed last minute, you two make your way to the beach. the WAAA alk alomg the pier is pretty, seeing the tall trees and shining sun refelecting off the vibrant green grass and the beautiful blue ocean.
once you two arrive at the beach, katsuki sets down his bag and pulls out a large blanket. you stand a bit farther away from your boyfriend and closer to the ocean, watching as kids played in the waves and surfers rode them. you bounced excitedly and waddled over to your boyfriend, watching him set the blanket onto the sand.
"katsu katsu katsu!!" you giggled with excitement as he sat down onto the blanket, anchored down by anything heavy enough to keep it from blowing away, though the wind wasnt too strong luckily. "yeah yeah, put on some sunscreen idiot." he said as he motioned you over. you took a seat on the blanket infront of bakugou, smiling at him as he helped you put on sunscreen.
after you two finished, he put the sunscreen away and grabbed your hand as he stood up. you suggested that you walk along the shore as the sun set, and after spending a while eating and shopping, it was almost time. "cmon! lets go katsuuu!"
he watched you as you dragged him towards the waves, big smile on your face and he swore that your eyes sparkled. he squeezed your hand tightly as he gazed past you at the ocean. you two watched the waves dance and crash and the beautiful pink sky slowly fade into a dark purple hue.
feeling the ocean on your feet, you turned to your boyfriend, met with a gaze, and expression that you aren't quite able to read. "whats that look katsu?" you asked, smiling as he released your hand and wrapped his arm around your waist. "dont worry about it dummy," he joked and you pouted at b b him, "love."
you felt your face heat up and you elbowed him lightly. "im serious katsu, like deadass." you turned to look at the waves. "im deadass too. you know i love you.. i don't get serious like this often so just accept it dummy." he said and lightly flicked your cheek. you smiled up at your ash blonde boyfriend, and jumped up to place a kiss on his cheek.
the sky shifted to a darker blue tone, white specks twinkling in the sky. stars, just like the ones bakugou sees in your eyes. your eyes were his galaxy and your smile was his sun.
as your boyfriend watched the stars twinkle, you watched him, his small smile warming your heart and his eyes twinkling, reflecting the beautiful scatter of dots in the sky.
you two had so much love for each other, so much care and passion. small moments like these may be simple, things considered cliches, but all those cliche stories made sense in that moment. those cliches were true and you were happy to be experiencing these feelings with your love, and he felt lucky to spend them with you too.
"hey katsu." you whispered over the sounds of the waves, but loud enough for him to hear. "yes princess?" he looked down at you.
"i love you. so much."
"i love you too sweetheart."
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horansqueen · 4 years
Text
You & Me : chapter 50
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A Niall Horan fanfiction ; rated MA
Sequel to AM CONVERSATIONS
(FINAL CHAPTER)
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CHAPTER 1 || CHAPTER 2 || CHAPTER 3 || CHAPTER 4 || CHAPTER 5 || CHAPTER 6 || CHAPTER 7 || CHAPTER 8 || CHAPTER 9 || CHAPTER 10 || CHAPTER 11 || CHAPTER 12 || CHAPTER 13 || CHAPTER 14 || CHAPTER 15 || CHAPTER 16 || CHAPTER 17 || CHAPTER 18 || CHAPTER 19 || CHAPTER 20 || CHAPTER 21 || CHAPTER 22 || CHAPTER 23 || CHAPTER 24 || CHAPTER 25 || CHAPTER 26 || CHAPTER 27 || CHAPTER 28 || CHAPTER 29 || CHAPTER 30 || CHAPTER 31 || CHAPTER 32 || CHAPTER 33 || CHAPTER 34 || CHAPTER 35 || CHAPTER 36 || CHAPTER 37 || CHAPTER 38 || CHAPTER 39 || CHAPTER 40 || CHAPTER 41 || CHAPTER 42 || CHAPTER 43 || CHAPTER 44 || CHAPTER 45 || CHAPTER 46 || CHAPTER 47 || CHAPTER 48 || CHAPTER 49
THANK YOU’S
I can't explain how much AM Conversations and YOU&ME has meant to me. This was a story I started just for fun after I realized how much I loved Niall. After only a few chapters, i almost let it die. It took me 4 years to decide to continue it again, despite knowing back then that no one cared or was interested to read. I don't know how I got lucky enough that you guys actually gave this story a chance. And I can't thank you enough for trusting me. I hope I entertained you through the past year and a half, and I really hope I made you go through a bunch of emotions, good and bad. I don't think all of you realize how happy you made me feel with the likes, the reblogs, the comments, the feedback and the ideas you sent me. It made me want to write more, it made me want to continue this story and actually finish it.
And here I am. It's the very first time I actually finish a story. two books. 105 chapters. Over 440k words. I can't pretend I'm not proud of this. This story will always be my baby, my favorite. And all of you who took time in your busy days to read and comment it mean more to me than I can ever explain.
I love you guys. I love you so much. I can't seem to express how grateful I am.
Julie ( @paynesqueen​ ): thank you for brainstorming with me almost every week. thank you for all your ideas, and all the help you gave me through the year I wrote these books. even when in quarantine, we'd talk for hours on the phone and you'd be there to help me. thank you for your big heart, thank you for being an incredible friend that I can always count on, thank you for listening to all my sad shit and feelings even if i know I rarely share because i feel stupid. thank you so so so so much! you're one of my best friends, and im so glad i have you in my life!
Isa ( @sushiniall​ ): you are such a beautiful persons. idk if we would have started talking if it wasnt from this story. i like to think that we would, but i can never be sure. thank you for always commenting, sending ideas, liking and reblogging. As a writer, it blows up my heart that someone would be so kind, and as a friend, it makes me want to cry. you're amazing, youre incredible, and you were always always there to cheer me up and tell me that I had talent, It made me keep going and I can never thank you enough for that. I love you. I really really do.
Laila ( @liallerr​ ) : what can i say? you've always been there for me, to make me feel better and to tell me how much you loved my writing. thank you for being such an incredible person. and thank you for being so patient with me whenever i'd message you (even if it wasnt about this story). thank you for never judging me, and for your beautiful friendship. I really hope I bring to you as much joy as you bring in my life. im so happy we met, im so glad we started talking.  i love you so so much, youre like a little sister to me. thank you for always commenting and reading my story. thank you for being you, because i cant think of a better quality in someone. thank you.
@ewhkylie​: you were always one of the first to comments every single chapter. how can i not thank you for being so loyal and giving my story a chance. i saw all the efforts you made into commenting. and every single time, it made me smile. youre amazing, thank you so much!
@llainnaroh​: thank you so much! your tags always made me smile! thank you!
@bamb11​: thank you for always caring and reading!!! youre amazing!
@behind-my-hazeleyes27​: i saw you reblog with tags or comments every time... thank you so much!
special thanks to you guys who reblogged, commented, or messaged me so often! thank you! i noticed every time!
thanks to you guys! @beachsecrets​ @wasteddarlinglover​ @torismusing @sunsetter96​ @bunbun9396 @missy14us​ @mannien​ @cybermugneckpsychic​ @mariamorris913​ @sunshine-sma​ @mypugsley​ @loulouloueh​ @awomanindeniall​ @tylkotroche​
and many many more! (im so sorry if i forgot you!)
thank you to all of you who liked and reblogged my chapters. thank you to those who recommended my stories to their friends or on your blog. thank you to the person(s) who nominated me for the 1d craft awards. thank you so much, you're all amazing!
thank you so so much to all of you who sent me anons about my chapters or the story as a whole. thank you for taking the time to do that. i love every single one of you even if i don't know who you are. just know that waking up with comments and feedback from you in my inbox made me smile every single time!
thank you to every single one of you who ever sent an idea or a request, even if i may not have used them. please know that it's not because your ideas weren't great, but just because it didnt fit in the story. (i received almost 300 requests/ideas for the 2 stories!)
thank you to the 41 persons who asked to be notified when this story was updated. I never thought it would be that many, and every single time i send you guys the link im amazed by how many of you actually care! thank you!
thank you to all of you, the silent readers. those who never messaged me, sent me comments or requests... i don't know who you are, but I know there are some of you out there. i hope at some point you get less shy and send me a comment or two!
i'm extremely thankful for all the love i received, and i'll never forget this. thank you everyone for following me in this crazy adventure. i love you all.
Olivia 💗
Chapter 50 (final chapter)
OLIVIA
I felt Niall's lips brush the skin of my neck and my lips curled. He wrapped his arms around my waist and I chuckled low, tilting my head to allow him to kiss me more. We had been back from our trip to Vegas for about a week, and had intentionally and very carefully ignored the messages and calls we had gotten. All we did was send an invitation for a party to everyone we knew, including our parents, along with plane tickets. We had taken hotel reservations for them and made sure their stay would be perfect. Everything was ready, everything was planned, and all the persons we loved the most in the world were going to be present. I was extremely stressed and as usual, Niall was totally relax about it. I had no idea how he did it, but the fact that he was so calm and laid-back helped me relax, too.
"This is amazing." he let out, pecking my skin more. "Everyone that really matters will be there."
"I hate talking in front of people, you know that." I whined, raising my nose up in a grimace.
"But everyone who'll be there actually loves you, petal." he argued, running his hands gently and slowly up my arms. "I love you the most and I'll be standing right next to you."
"How do you think they're react?"
"Mm, our moms will cry, our dads will laugh, our friends will scream and Louis will curse."
I let out a louder laughter, making Niall chuckle against my neck.
"You told him, didn't you?"
"I showed him the ring but I didn't tell him when I was going to ask you, or that we would just fly to Vegas to get married." he shrugged. "I just left him there and ran to you."
I smiled fondly and turned around in his arms to face him, tilting my chin and licking my lips as I stared in his eyes. He was wearing a tie and I gripped it gently, pulling on it. He had convinced me to wear a dress even if I knew I'd feel uncomfortable the whole evening but I knew I couldn't just wear sweatpants to this event, even if I desperately wanted to.
"How's my make up?" I finally asked, raising my eyebrows, after a few minutes of silence.
"On point." he replied, making me laugh.
"You have no idea what you're talking about, do you?" I asked as he pulled me closer by the waist.
"No idea. None."
I laughed more and he bent down to kiss me gently. "All I know is that you're beautiful. You always are." he whispered, brushing his lips against mine again.
"You're so full of shit, Horan." I breathed back against his mouth, my lips curling slightly.
"I mean it." he insisted very low, his arms slipping around my waist as he pressed my body against his. "You're the most beautiful woman i've ever seen. You shine so much, you glow, my love."
I giggled and he smiled, moving his face slightly away to look at me. My smile faltered a bit and turned into a fond one. I wanted to stay right there, in our living room, as he'd hold me close, but I knew we had somewhere to be.
"My wife."
My eyes fluttered close and my lips curled more. All the papers were signed and the 'I do's were said. We were officially husband and wife and that thought always made my heart jump in my chest. It probably always would.
"Yes?"
"I would love to stay here and make love to you all evening but we should really get going."
I laughed a bit and shook my head, knowing it was exactly what we had been doing for the past weeks but I didn't mention anything. Instead, I tilted my head and just nodded. I was stressed and I was not sure why but after everyone was arrived and had consumed at least one drink, Niall walked up to the small stage and I frowned a bit when I saw him grab his guitar. His eyes found me and he made a quick head movement, telling me to join him.
"Go!" Louis told me, pushing me gently but I just pressed my lips together and breathed in deeply. "Come on, my queen."
I finally joined Niall and he cleared his throat, placing himself in front of the microphone. That was it, that was the moment I was dreading, and I started feeling nauseous.
"Hello everyone, thank you for coming here tonight." he let out with a smile. "I know you're all here because you think we're getting engaged."
I bit my bottom lip but suddenly, I relaxed. Perhaps, it was the sound of his voice that calmed me down, or maybe the fact that we were surrounded by all the people we loved, or maybe it was just the thought that we were married and that no one could take that away from us. Either way, I moved closer and I smiled while staring at him.
"Uhm, we're not getting engaged. In fact, if you haven’t heard from us at all in the past two weeks, it's because we flew to Vegas and got married there."
The memory of him, standing in front of me as he held my hands and promised to love me forever came back to my mind and I held my breath. Everyone started whispering but coming loud from all the murmurs was the sound of my best friend screaming "FUCK YEA!" from the middle of the room. I let out a laughter as my eyes looked for him and he sent me a 'rock on' sign with his free hand while the other was holding up a glass of wine.
"Thank you, Tommo." my boyfriend let out with a smile and a small head movement. "So you guys are here to celebrate the fact that Olivia and I are husband and wife, legally and emotionally. I waited until you were all at least a bit intoxicated to let out the news but if you're here, it's because we love you, and we wanted to live this with you. We knew you would all be happy for us, because after all, Liv and I, it was meant to be."
His eyes found me and I smiled more, I took a step closer and licked my lips as In gripped the side of my dress nervously. It took only a second for Niall's hand to reach mine and when he squeezed my fingers, I felt better.
"Thank you so much for being here. We're sorry you missed the ceremony, but it was important for us to do it just the two of us. When you find the love of your life, that one person you want to spend all your days with until the very last, then there's no reason to wait. I've always known Niall was my soulmate, but now I know I'm his too, and nothing can change that. I know it's cheesy, but each and every single one of you were with us when we said 'I do'"
Niall chuckled next to me and shook his head slightly. "Here, let me reenact what happened to you." he turned to me and just let out a low 'I do' before grabbing my face and kissing me.
It was not as gentle and emotional as it had been when it really happened, but I still felt my heart jump in my chest. I loved the feeling of his warm palms on my cheeks and the way his fingertips brushed against my jaw and neck. I loved his touch. I heard everyone start cheering and clapping and I laughed through the kiss, feeling his lips curl into a smile too.
When he pulled away, I could swear my eyes were sparkling and when his eyes met mine, he smiled even more. "Okay so I wrote a song for you." he explained when the small crowd of our families and friends became quieter. "I wanted to sing it here, in front of everyone, because I thought it was perfect for today."
I took a step back and when he started singing, I recognized the lyrics. I had read them in his notebook a few months before. It was the song he wrote in the middle of the night and I remembered watching him for so long, his pen running quickly on the paper and his hand moving in his hair from time to time, messing it on the top of his head. I remember reading the lyrics the next day and tearing up when I realized there was my name at the bottom. I remembered everything and I tried to keep the tears in as he sang.
"Yeah, I see us in black and white Crystal clear on a star lit night In all your gorgeous colors I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life See you standing in your dress Swear in front of all our friends There'll never be another I promise that I'll love you for the rest of my life"
I knew Niall would have preferred a more traditional wedding, and I also knew he gave it up just for me. This small reception was the closest he would get from telling everyone that he promised to love me forever and somehow, with this song, he was doing it very clearly and openly.
"I want the world to witness When we finally say I do It's the way you love I gotta give it back to you I can't promise picket fences Or sunny afternoons But, at night when I close my eyes"
I held my breath, feeling suddenly a bit guilty that he couldn't have his family and friends with him when we got married, but I teared up at how beautiful his lyrics were, even if I already knew that. I breathed in deeply only when the song was over and without thinking, I walked up to him quickly, got on my tiptoes and kissed him.
"I love you so much." I just let out before my lips crashed against his.
Everyone started clapping again but I was not sure if it was for the kiss or the song. Either way, it didn't matter. I just deppened the kiss and he answered it without hesitation. I knew he didn't like PDA, but I couldn't help it and when he pulled me closer, I knew he didn't mind. I felt half of his guitar press on my stomach and laughed a bit.
"I love you too."
NIALL
Everyone was dancing, talking, laughing and drinking. I remained close to my wife the whole time and when I saw our parents talking together, I knew that was the ultimate test. I was pretty sure they would be okay with this but I was still a bit scared of their reaction. I felt Liv hold my hand so tight that I almost took it back. Instead, I squeezed her fingers back and smiled as we walked up to them. Quickly, my mom engulfed me in a hug and all the stress disappeared. I noticed Olivia's parents do the same to her and I hugged my dad before turning to my parents-in-law and hold out my hand to her father. It took a few seconds but his lips finally curled and he shook my hand before pulling on it and hugging me too.
"I am happy for you, son."
"Thank you."
"We're sorry that you couldn't be there with us. I promise we didn't want to hurt you, we just..." Liv started before licking her lips and pressing them together. "We just wanted to do that alone."
Her mom raised her eyebrows and they stared at each other in silence for a while.
"Es-tu heureuse?"
My girlfriend's lips curled and her eyes fluttered a bit. "I've never been happier, maman."
Her mom nodded and after a while, it was my mom's turn to hug her. When they pulled away, Olivia frowned and her lips parted. I couldn't help but think that she looked too pretty for words but I tried to push that thought away when I heard only one word escape her mouth. "How...?" My mom smiled more and chuckled slightly. "I just do."
I was about to ask them what they were talking about but I felt someone slap my back and it took me by surprise. I jumped slightly and groaned low as Louis appeared in front of me.
"Congrats mate, I'm happy for both of you." he said, wrapping his arms around me and hugging me so tight that I lost my breath.
"Thank you." I said as he let go of me to engulf my girlfriend into a tight and more emotional hug.
I stared at them for a few seconds and finally turned to Eleanor who congratulated me too before hugging me. Soon, Liam, Julie and Harry joined us and after hugging everyone, we all started talking and laughing together. I knew everything would go well but at the same time, I was a bit nervous. It was important for me that our friends and family would be okay with the fact that we got married without telling them, and I just wanted them to know it was not against them at all, but mostly just for Liv and I. We had started just the two of us, and it was just the obvious way to do this.
For the rest of the night, I spent my time watching my girlfriend dance, laugh and interact with the people we loved, telling myself that this was the happiest time of my entire life. I watched everyone leave one by one, our parents being the firsts and then our friends. Louis was the last one to leave and we decided to just leave with him.
"You know, you literally made me want to do it too." he let out low, looking at our girlfriends saying their goodbyes and making me frown. "Your speech earlier. It made me realize that maybe I shouldn't wait anymore."
My lips curled and I let out a chuckle. "Go for it." I just let out, knowing perfectly well that their couple was as strong as ours and that they both considered each other their soulmates. "I don't even know why you waited that long."
He didn't send me a glance, he just kept looking at El and after a few minutes, we said good night and left in a different cab. It's only when we walked inside and closed the door behind us that I felt all the stress disappear from my body. It was a good stress, but it was still nice to relax.
Olivia disappeared in the hall and I just sat on the couch, loosening my tie and putting my feet on the coffee table. I closed my eyes and leaned my head on the back of the couch as a bunch of memories came to mine. I had been so close to lose the love of my life forever and by my fault. I had hurt her in a way I had never hurt anyone else in my life and at the same time, I had hurt myself in a way I had never been hut before without realizing it immediately. I couldn't lie and pretend Olivia was not the best thing that has ever happened to me because she was, and I liked to believe I was for her, too. You can call it fate, you can call it destiny, you can call it 'soulmates' but in the end, it was just an other love story for most people. For me, however, it was epic and the accomplishment of a lifetime.
After everything we've been through, every wrong decisions, every mistake and every problem, we still managed to reach this point of happiness together. Olivia has always told me that love was not all you need, despite the popular song, and I knew she was right. But it was because of the love we have for each other that we actually tried over and over again. It was because of this love that we actually ended up together, because we were ready to make the effort, and because we believed in the feelings we had. I knew I would never truly be happy without her and now that we were together, I planned to do everything possible and impossible to keep her in my life.
My girlfriend came back and put something next to the couch, which I guessed was her purse. I was not surprised to see she had changed into a pair of my sweatpants and a shirt that also belonged to me but looked so much better on her. It stuck to her chest and hips in a way it didn't to me and I loved it more than I should.
"I would have loved to take that dress off of you myself." I admitted with a smirk, making her raise her nose up as she sent me a smile. "But hey, I'm not surprised."
She moved closer and gripped my tie, pulling on it gently and making me laugh right before her lips reached mine. I was a bit tipsy and mixed with my happiness, it made me sound totally drunk, but she knew me well enough to know I was just ecstatic from the night we just had had.
"You can take my sweatpants and t-shirt off later, if you want." she proposed before I nodded. "I'm not wearing anything under, if it changes anything."
I chuckled and she kissed my lips again as one of my hands reached for her waist. "Come on, sit on me, will you?"
I watched her hesitate and bite her bottom lip gently before actually straddling me. I moved my chin up, endeared by her behavior, and my hands reached for her thighs. I let my palms rub slowly on the fabric of her pants and stared at her as she licked her lips.
"Thank you for the song." she whispered, a shy smile gracing her lips as she looked away. "Honestly, I had read the lyrics before. I know I shouldn't have but it was sort of an accident."
I raised my eyebrows and smiled back at her. "You're so nosy I swear," I joked. "No one told you not to touch other people's stuff?"
"I'm sorry! I know I shouldn't have. Forgive me?" she asked with a cute grimace, making me roll my eyes with a smile.
"Of course." I just let out, moving my head slightly. "I almost sang you 'This Town' instead." I paused and she frowned. "I know I wrote it when we first dated, and I told you it was partially about you, and partially fiction... but when you were with Dylan and we met again, It hit me how it had completely turned out to be what I was actually going through. And the lyrics are still true, you know? Everything comes back to you."
Her eyes fluttered and a fond smile spread on her lips. She brought her hands to my cheeks and let her thumbs brush on my stubble. I wanted to keep telling her how much I loved her but quickly, she pressed her mouth against mine and my hands gripped her thighs at how good she tasted. I don't know how long we stayed close, her forehead leaning against mine while we both kept out eyes closed, but I focused on her weight on my lap and the aroma of honey and vanilla invading my nose. I could have stayed like that all night.
"Told you our parents would be happy." I let out after a while, making her sit back up to look at me.
"Mm, and your brother?" she asked, raising her eyebrows.
"He sent a text message to say congrats earlier." I explained as my hands kept running on her thighs. "You know we're gonna have to entertain our parents for a few days. That means we can't spend our days locked her to fuck anymore."
She laughed a bit and tilted her head. "I think we can take a few days break."
I frowned but shook my head, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her closer. "That's not what I meant, we can still have sex when we come back home, and if you're too exhausted I can do all the to work."
"I suspect you actually enjoy that." she laughed, making me smile more.
"Mm, maybe I do."
I pulled her closer and when her lips brushed against mine, I heard her whimper low. I slowly deepened the kiss just to taste her and she let me, moving as close to me as she could. I felt her ass rub on my thighs and groaned when it reached my cock.
"Maybe we should go to our room now, what d'you say?" I proposed in a whisper before kissing her more.
"Not yet." she murmured back, grabbing my upper lip between hers and sucking on it.
I felt myself get hornier and groaned low as I grabbed her waist and turned us around, laying her down on the couch. She let out a little scream and I quickly moved over her, smiling big.
"Fine then, we'll do it here."
We kissed a bit roughly and deeply for a while but when my hand slipped under her shirt, she quickly stopped me. "Niall wait, I have something for you first."
I frowned but even if I was curious, I definitely thought it could wait. Seeing her face though made me back away slightly and after a few seconds, I sat up and she did the same, pulling on her shirt to put it back in place.
Without a word, she reached for what she had put next to the couch and held me a white gift bag. I stared at it for a while and finally turned to her, a bit suspiciously.
"Did I miss something? An anniversary or something else that was important?"
She chuckled and shook her head, but I noticed how she was nervously playing with the fabric of her pants. "No, don't worry. I just wanted to give you a little something."
We just looked at each other for a while and I let my eyes roam on her face before finally take the colored tissues off the bag and dive my hand in it. I grabbed something and took it out but it took a few seconds for my brain to process everything. It was a piece of fabric, almost the same white as the bag but a bit lighter, and when I turned it around, I understood. On the front was written "my daddy is a rockstar" and somehow, I felt my heart jump so high in my chest I had to swallow it back.
"Petal." I whispered before turning to look at her. "Are you pregnant?"
Slowly, she nodded, her eyes never leaving mine, and I felt my heart jump for a second time. I blinked a few times, feeling tears coming to my eyes as a bunch of emotions flooded me. My eyes roamed on her and ended on her belly who looked exactly like it always did but when I looked up, I held my breath, realizing something.
"My mom knows."
She nodded slowly again. "She... she guessed it. I don't know how she knew, but she congratulated me earlier, at the party."
"You... you didn't drink?"
"Not a drip. I had soda." she explained, tilting her head and pressing her lips together. "I thought you had noticed."
I didn't answer, I just blinked again a few times before looking back at the small pajama I was holding. It seemed surreal and despite what I thought I would feel if it happened, I felt overly emotional but in a good way.
"I'm really gonna be a dad?" I asked, raising my eyebrows and finally turning to my girlfriend who just nodded. I chuckled a bit, and then some more. "Fookin' hell."
"Are you happy?"
Her question was legit since we had had a pregnancy scare a few months earlier, but it seemed like so many things had happened in such a short period of time and now that my tour was over, I felt like it was a good time to jump into this.
"Honestly, Olivia..." I turned on the couch to face her and noticed she was holding her breath and tearing up. I moved closer and her eyes fluttered. I watched one single tear fall from her left one and cupped her face, brushing my thumb on her cheekbone to catch the tear. "I thought marrying you and finally being with you was the highest moments of my life. I honestly never thought I could be even happier than I already was. But you just made me the happiest man in the whole fookin' world, pet."
She let out a loud sigh of relief and I brought my lips against hers. "I love you so much, Olivia. I can't wait for that future with you. You and Me. This is just the beginning."
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highpope · 3 years
Text
Silver Keys - Ch. One
JJ Maybank x oc / Soulmate AU / Topper x oc
warnings: none, if there are any let me know!
Word Count: 2k ish
Notes: Hi guys, sorry this is so long overdue. I was fighting with this one. But i really wanted to update this story. It’s not my fave but that’s okay. ** As always, reblogs and feedback is welcome and appreciated. 
Masterlist - READ PROLOGUE FIRST :))
June sat at the piano she got for her 16th birthday. She had been saving up for years and finally had enough money for a keyboard. It wasn’t the same as the beautiful grand piano at her instructors, but it did the job. June nervously watched the clock tick down to midnight and tried to focus on the song she was trying to learn. If she came into lessons next week without having learned at least half of it she wouldn’t be on track to play at the recital in a few weeks. It was a big deal to her parents, and June too. The recital was on the mainland with tons of different kids from the surrounding areas. June had never gotten an opportunity to play and she wasn’t about to let worrying about her potential soulmate stop her. 
She took a deep breath and began to play. As the minutes turned to seconds, June was gracefully gliding her fingers up and down the keyboard, trying to make sense of the melodies, allowing the notes to soak into the room. 
On the morning of her birthday, June walked down the stairs into the kitchen to see a note and a box of donuts. It was Saturday, meaning both her parents were working and Olivia, her sister, was going to be sleeping the day away. June grabbed a powder sugar donut from the box and read the note: 
Happy Birthday, Love! We can’t wait to celebrate with you tonight. 
Have fun today, Mom and Dad
She smiles and folds the note up. June was just about to grab another donut when the doorbell rang. She looked at the time, 9:30. There’s no way any family member would be stopping by and Olivia’s friends wouldn’t show up unannounced. June opens the door to reveal JJ dressed in shorts and a light long sleeve t-shirt. 
“Happy birthday Ju Ju!” JJ exclaims.
June rolled her eyes, “God, please don’t call me that.” She opened the door wide to let him in. The nickname originated from June’s younger sister. They were five years apart and she couldn’t properly say June’s name for quite a while. So from ages 5 to 8, she was Ju Ju. 
“Nah, I think 18 is the year we bring it back,” JJ said, slinging his arm around her shoulders. 
“Absolutely not,” June says, tapping his cheek lightly, “Thanks though.” He smiles as she jumps up onto one of the stools in the kitchen, “what’s up?”
“You, miss birthday girl, have very important places to be. Go get dressed.” 
“Where exactly do I have to be?” 
“Well, first, Kie’s and then,” JJ motions like he is zipping his lips and throwing the key away. June narrows her eyes causing him to throw up his hands in defense. 
“Okay, fine, but don’t eat my donuts!” June runs up the stairs and begins to get ready. She decides on a blue tube top, shorts, and a white cropped jacket. She runs a brush through her hair and packs her swimsuit and a few other things in a drawstring before going down the hallway to leave a note for her sister. She tells her where she’s going to be and to call when she gets up. 
JJ and her drive to Kiara’a in his truck, the windows down and the radio stuck on the same channel it’s been on since he got it. They’ve learned to tolerate it. JJ was so proud of the truck when he first showed the pogues. He had gotten a busted down pickup from some guy on the island and fixed it up pretty much by himself. The rest of them promised to never make fun of it. 
“Happy Birthday!” The pogues yell when June opens the door. She can’t contain her laughter. Everyone is wearing pink sparkly party hats. Kie instantly comes over to her, throwing her arms around her neck, “baby is eighteen!” June squeezes back and accepts a hat identical to the rest and hands one to JJ who shuts the door behind them. 
“Looking good, boys.” June laughs at Pope and John B posing in their hats. 
“It’s the required attire didn’t you hear?” John B asks, kissing the top of June's head and Pope slinging an arm around her shoulders. They lead her through the kitchen and the sliding door to the outdoor patio. The lounge chairs are set up along with string lights and a birthday banner. It was perfect. The whole thing, being with her favorite people, the perfect weather. 
“You guys didn’t have to do all of this.” 
“But you deserve it. You’re always the first to do anything for the rest of us,” Pope says. 
“He’s right, Juney,” Kie says, smiling. 
“You’re a bunch of saps,” JJ says plopping into a chair. 
After spending the morning and early afternoon hanging out in Kie’s backyard, the five piled into the van and headed down to the beach. The boys were in the water before June could even set her stuff down. It was arguably not warm enough to swim, but that didn’t stop them. Kie and June decided to layout, occasionally sneaking a few drinks from the water bottle filled with alcohol. 
“So how are you feeling about the whole soulmate thing?” Kie asks, bumping her shoulder against June’s. 
To be honest, June had forgotten all about it. She could barely sleep last night she was so nervous, but now that it could happen whenever, she felt much better.
“Honestly okay.” She admitted.
“Do you think you already know who it is?”
“I mean that happens more often than not, right? Just look at our parents.” Kie’s parents had known each other in high school, having grown up on the island, but didn’t know they were soulmates until later down the line. That happens all the time. Whether or not it’s just coincidence or really is fate, June hadn’t decided yet. 
“I guess you’re right.” She paused before speaking again, “I don’t think I want to already know them. I don’t want to marry someone we went to high school with and be stuck here only for our kids to end up the same way.” Seeing Kiara open up like this made June wonder about her own future. 
“Don’t worry Kie, you’re gonna go somewhere cool like Australia and stop the wildfires and clean the oceans and fall in love with some really hot girl and leave us all behind forever.” 
She moved her sunglasses off her face to hold back her hair, “I could never leave you, but you really think so?”
“Of course. You’re going places. John B, JJ, and I are gonna be stuck here smelling like fish bait until we’re 80.” June gags.
Kiara laughs, making a disgusted face, “what about Pope?” 
“Nah, he’s too good for this place.” They both laugh so hard they don’t even notice the boys had made their way back to where they were laying.
“What’s so funny?” John B asks, shaking out his hair.
“Nothing,” Kie says with a smile on her lips. The boys share a knowing look before dropping it altogether. That’s when June’s phone chimes with a message from her sister. 
Mom said to make sure you were home soon for tonight. We’re almost all set up here.
I guess Aunt Morrane is coming:/
“No,” June groans at the last of Olivia’s message. 
“What’s wrong?” JJ asks, sitting down next to her. 
“My Aunt is coming to dinner tonight.”
“The horror!” John B mocks. 
“Stop! I’m serious. She’s a nutcase.” June replies, throwing a towel at his face. He catches it in one swift motion. 
“Ju it’s gonna be fine.” JJ said reassuringly, “I’ll drop you back off.” 
The pogues only stayed a little while longer before packing up their stuff into the van and parting ways once back at Kiara’s. 
“I won’t have any fun without you,” Kie begged before June got into the truck. 
“You’re gonna be fine.” The rest of the group was going to the first official kegger of the summer. June always missed it. She was sure she would hear all about it tomorrow when she would stop by the chateau with a bunch of water and ibuprofen in the morning to make sure they were all breathing. 
“Hey, thanks, J,” June says when JJ had pulled up in front of her house. 
“No problem,” he starts. June reaches for the door handle, “actually, I got you something.” 
Surprised, June says “You didn’t have to get me anything.” 
He waves her off and reaches into the glove compartment, pulling out a bracelet, “uh. It’s not wrapped or anything.” 
June examines the bracelet, it was a brown braided string with a single pearl threaded in the middle. 
“I love it.” 
“Really?” JJ asks, scrunching up his nose, “because it’s okay if you don’t I just thought-”
“No, no I do. Thank you,” June says and reaches up to kiss his cheek. Just then there is a loud pounding coming from the passenger side window, causing June to startle and drop the bracelet. Both June and JJ lean in to grab it off the floor of the car and smack heads. “Shit, sorry”
“Ow!” 
JJ finally grabs the bracelet and hands it back to her before they are both faced with Aunt Morrane opening the door and practically dragging her out of the truck. 
“You know,” her aunt starts, “darling, everyone is waiting inside.” 
“I’ll just be one second, I promise.” She says flashing a smile to her aunt and pleading eyes to JJ. He tries to hide his laughter. 
Aunt Morrane locks arms with June and begins walking up to their sidewalk, quite literally dragging her by her feet, and begins talking about this show she was watching.
“Happy Birthday, Ju Ju!” JJ yells from the truck. June tries to flip him off as discreetly as possible with her aunt still gripping on to her. 
At the door, her mother engulfs her into a hug, “Happy 18th, love.” 
“Thank you, mama.” 
“Was that JJ? You know he could've come in. We have enough food.”
“It’s okay, Mama, he had plans.” That satisfied her enough as she went to close the door and straight back into the kitchen. June took off her shoes and that’s when she heard it. It only lasted a minute and she couldn’t recite it if she was asked, but it was there. Faint, but clear. Just how Pope had described it. Just how everyone had described it. Her soulmate. 
taglist: @allycat449-blog @ifilwtmfc (hi im sorry I forgot to tag yall) 
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alchemist-shizun · 5 years
Text
To tend thee is my care
ACT I
ACT II - Read on Ao3!
See the awesome fanart!
Word count: 13,679 
Taglist: @lesbianturtle @len-art-trash @i-need-you-buddy @jeevashun @quietlypondering  @creativity-killed-thekitten @bookwyrminspiration @i-have-n0-idea-what-im-d0ing  @softanxiouspatton @be-more-chaotic @pheonix-inside-reblogs @www-dot-ohshit-dot-com @datfearlessfangirl @alltimevirgilant @royalnerd829 @just-fic-me-up @theblankest123 @theotherella​ @thesleepyraziel @gaylotusthatexists @sendingcookiesfromhell @mijako98 @logicalberry @maybe-i-like-the-misery @orderly-opaline @purpledemond
(Please tell me if you want to be added too for Act II!)
Characters: Virgil, Nonbinary!Roman
Summary: You’ve heard of enemies to lovers now get ready for acquaintances to friends to now we’re fighting because I’m scared of your rejection so I’m pretending it’s your fault when it clearly is mine to friends again, even though you’re an idiot, but I still love you to lovers. 
Roman and Virgil are both part of the theater group of their school, Roman is one of the actors, while Virgil is the head of the stage design group. Despite being in the same year and having lessons in the same building, they hadn’t really ever talked to each other, but everything was about to change when the teachers, heads of the whole theater group, announced that they were going to challenge themselves by presenting one of Euipides’ last plays: The Bacchantes. Follow our two main characters helping each other out as one is forced to learn how to act in a matter of months and the other goes through a journey of self-discovery as he studies his role.
Pairing(s): Prinxiety (I’m unpredictable)
Warning(s): Mild swearing, Death mention (mostly when talking about the tragedy), Blood mention (once), Negative thinking, Implied toxic parenting (once), [Me projecting heavily onto Virgil (also Ro at some point)]
A/n: I’ve been writing this for months and I can’t explain how proud I am to show you guys this! Before you start reading, I want to inform you that the school system I write about here is not the American one since I know little to nothing about it. Instead I’ll be using the one of my country for reasons of simplicity. (All names I use here are invented, so you can place the events wherever you’d like.) I thought about doing a long for this plot but I chose to write a one shot instead, since it’s pretty long I decided to divide it into two acts, the second one is coming very soon. I studied and read the whole play translated in my original language, that’s where the inspiration for my au came from. All the English translations I used for the play are from here, here and here. The song mentioned is So Contagious by Acceptance. That being said, hope you enjoy!
✾✾✾✾
What now?
It was during an October’s Tuesday that Virgil had started panicking due to school stress.
It wasn’t like his teachers hadn’t been pressuring his class ever since they entered their first fifth year lesson: partly because of the final exams, the rest of the time they asked about their university choices.
This year’s archaeological excavation, an experience reserved only to the students of his course, was also placed exactly in those three weeks of October were the theater group had started.
Tuesday in October for Virgil meant lessons until half past midday, research for the upcoming excavation exhibition until two p.m., theater club for an hour, then back to doing research with one of his teachers and half of his classmates until 17:00.
In all honesty, he wouldn’t have minded being buried alive when they’d have to cover back up the site.
Virgil had tried convincing himself that it wasn’t really that hard, besides the club had just started and the first few days were mostly focused on helping the first years settle, be comfortable with the teachers and also test out their abilities. And this one was only the second meeting.
But, of course, his day had to get worse. Life was trying him, and boy, did he hate sudden drastic changes.
It was when he noticed all the odd attention he was getting by the teachers that he realized something was definitely going to go wrong.
Everyone took a seat on the wooden bleachers of the old gym, they were basically attached to the pavement and the obnoxious yellow-painted walls of the large room. A quick glance around and you had the feeling that everything was going to collapse at any moment.
Virgil saw some familiar faces, some new ones, but he definitely couldn’t forget about the regulars: his beloved stage deseign group, which were a bunch of students that the teacher trusted him enough to take care of and teach them what they had to do during shows and how to prepare the stage. And next to them some actors from the last three years, Dave, Bonnie, Lukas and Roman.
He and Roman were the only ones brave enough to stick around even during the toughest year of that hellhole, so everyone silently respected them. And just as much as Virgil helped the newcomers in his group, Roman was happy to lend a hand in acting along side the most talented fourth and third years above mentioned.
« Well hello and welcome back here, guys! » Mrs. Michaelis had started, clasping her hands together, she was an English grammar and literature teacher.
After making sure everybody had arrived, they explained that since the week after they were going to see the first years’ “auditions” as they liked to call them, but they were really simply methods to check how promising someone could be at acting.
« I know this may sound shocking, we still can’t believe it- »
« Mostly because normally it takes us a couple of months before choosing a script. » Mrs. Eagan, an ancient Greek and Latin teacher, had interrupted, causing multiple chuckles from the students.
« … As I was saying, yes. We already know the play that we’ll be covering this year, we also have scripts ready for almost everybody. But there’s some news! »
« This year we decided to sign up our group and participate to some kind of challenge! » murmurs began to fill the room, as uneasiness set in Virgil’s stomach. Why make things harder for everybody? Wasn’t it just as good doing a simple show one night and one morning?
« Some, let’s say, “judges” are going to attend our play and afterwards, if they’re satisfied enough, they will let us take our production to the biggest local theater! »
The murmurs transformed into gasps, that theater was placed in the city of their province, getting an invitation was a huge challenge.
« And our play is going to be … » Mrs. Eagan’s eyes met Virgil’s and fixated on them. That’s when he began overthinking. Why was she looking directly at him? That never meant good news. « … Euripides’ tragedy, The Bacchantes. »
Oh.
Oh, fuck.
Only his eyes widened among the confused looks of most of the students. He had studied that play, along side many other ones, in his fourth year. He did truly love them, but damn him if they weren’t already a challenge to portray.
« That’s right Virgil, you know it. » why was also the English teacher giving him his attention? What were they planning, did he have to explain the play to everybody?
All the students turned to face him, some quietly asking what was the plot, some fourth years of his same course demanded to know if it was a difficult topic.
« Easy now, everybody, he’s already been tested last year by Mr. Richardson. » one of the teachers interrupted, walking closer to the spot where Virgil sat, for some reason he had found himself next to the “talented actors group”.
They explained the plot for everybody after that.
« We know it might be real tough, so this year we already agreed on the roles beforehand. Don’t worry, if you didn’t get your time to shine this year, in the next ones you totally will. »
Wait, he wasn’t part of the actors group, why did this have anything to do with him? Why were they still staring at him?
To his relief, the teachers addressed the newcomers first. « We were thinking about giving the role of the chorus to the first and second years, they have long bits, but we can split them instead of making you all recite them, so that you don’t feel too burdened and the role becomes easy for all of you. »
« The roles of the messengers will be given to our third years, messengers are used to explain everything that happens that does not happen on scene. One of the rules for tragedies was that the scene had to take place in the same time and place. Also, they didn’t show blood and/or murders/suicides on scene. They were all narrated. »
« As for our three fourth years. » they looked over Virgil’s shoulder to Dave, Lukas and Bonnie. « Your roles will be Cadmus, Tiresias and Agave. They play a very important part in the whole story, we trust you’ll do a great job. »
« As for our main characters, Pentheus and Dionysus … » they set their eyes on Roman, who looked more expectant than ever.
But then they also shifted their glances to Virgil.
« We were thinking our only fifth years could have their roles as a good way of saying goodbye to them, since this will be their last play. » everybody else was nodding in agreement, Roman was beaming but slightly confused. Wasn’t Virgil part of the stage design group?
In fact, our little emo kid could only look back in disbelief.
« Roman, Virgil, would you like to become a king and a god, respectively? »
What now?
As the beloved actor was about to answer, Virgil interrupted with a shy apology. « I’m sorry, but there must be a mistake, I’m not part of the actors group, I’ve never acted in the past four years, actually. »
« We know Virgil, but we really thought it might be such a nice way of thanking you guys for your contributions all these years. »
Oh yes, you’re right, putting me in a stress condition by making me do something I have no idea about for a big project that could take us to one of the largest theaters of the country is definitely the best choice you could have made.
All he was able to say was a stuttering noise, as they continued with their little speech. « And Roman is such a good actor, he’s going to help you for sure, aren’t you? »
The mentioned boy nodded vigorously, then proceeded to show one of his brightest smiles. « I always come to the rescue of my fellow actors in need. »
Yeah. Amazing. He was stuck with their decision.
« Besides you already probably know each other pretty well by now, so it won’t be a problem! »
The two students looked at each other. The recognizable expressions of two teens that, despite being in the same year and club, had never said a single word to each other apart from when needed during rehearsals.
« … Right. »
« But what about my group then? » Virgil questioned, he was definitely not going to leave them behind just like that.
« You don’t have to worry about them. This year your History of Art teacher will be lending a hand with the stage and volunteered to be the head of the group. »
Right. Mr. Williams, one of the only teachers that were pretty tolerable in his class.
« And look at them. » he did so, and he was met with happy smiles and encouraging faces. « I’m sure they’ll do a good job after four years with you by their side. Right, Anastasia? »
Anastasia was one of the oldest of the bunch, if not one of the wisest and most skilled, sometimes they wondered if she could just do anything that crossed her mind. « You got it! » she leaned in as if to get closer to the older boy. « We’ll be cheering for you Virge! » she concluded, followed by a couple of “Yeah!“s.
Everybody was so joyful and expectant that he couldn’t help but comply, so he decided to simply sigh and reply with nothing.
As the teachers continued with their topics for the meeting, Virgil couldn’t help but have a single thought in his mind.
This is going to be the most awkward thing I’ve ever done in my entire life.
✾✾✾✾
As soon as the meeting came to an end, Virgil was fast to get up and rush towards the dungeon’s stairs that would lead again to the surface. Basically there were two buildings, the school and the gym, linked by a little dungeon were there were all the labs and computer rooms.
He had to get back to the library as soon as he could, or god knows what “you’re late” speech his teacher would have given him. He was always literally on the verge of marking his students as absent if they didn’t show up to the lesson in the exact minute before the bell rang.
Virgil decided to panic about the dumpster fire that had come his way during the meeting after that. One issue at a time. First of all, he had to reach the stairs’ gate and push-
« Hey! Wait for me. »
God, he didn’t have time for this. He kept walking, ignoring the voice behind him and hoping for it to give up and leave him to his well-deserved peace and quiet. At least for three minutes.
As he walked, he found none but Roman himself matching his pace and walking by his side with a curious look. Who could blame him for wanting to be nice?
« You forgot your stuff in your classroom too? » he tried, not a brilliant starter for a conversation, but he had to get something out of the boy.
« No. » cut and dry, that was the only thing that Virgil dared to let escape his mouth.
« Where to, then? »
« The library. »
« Oh, are you waiting for a bus? Maybe I could keep you company. »
« Listen. » they made to a stop as they reached the last floor, not that far off from Virgil’s destination. « Today’s already been as stressful as it is, could you just … go straight to the point? I don’t have much time here. »
It was not like he had meant to sound rude, it wasn’t like it was his purpose either to brush off someone just like that or to see the other boy’s hurt expression. But he had reached a limit in which he didn’t really care-
« Oh, my apologies, then. »
And there was the guilt.
« I was just wondering if we could exchange numbers, if it isn’t uncomfortable for you. I guess we’ll need to hang out in the future. » he tried to sound as confident as he could, but it was as if “awkward” was scribbled all over his face.
« Sure, are you asking me on a date next? » with all the sarcasm injected in his words, he sure as hell wasn’t expecting Roman’s remark.
« Well, if you wouldn’t mind. » a sly smile made its way through the actor’s face, but was soon replaced by a troubled expression when he saw Virgil’s eye roll and sigh.
« Was I … was I too straightforward? I didn’t- »
« You’re fine, calm down. » Virgil quickly took out his phone and unlocked it before passing it to the other student. As he quietly typed after a murmured “alright”, Virgil couldn’t help but wonder if he had ever upset anyone with his bold statements. It wasn’t like this town was open minded, while he seemed … particularly flamboyant.
Before he could finish his thoughts, he had his phone back in his hands and the not-so-much-stranger-anymore was already heading towards his classroom to get his backpack.
« I sent myself a message. » he warned, then he disappeared and reappeared in a matter of seconds, marched down the hall and flashed him a toothy smile while waving his hand.
« Don’t be a stranger, I’ll see you tomorrow! »
Virgil only nodded and found it impossible to take his eyes off of him until the last lock of hair had vanished down the stairs, wondering what had just happened. Maybe that was the magic that worked on his public every year.
He gave a rapid look at the screen of his phone, noticing that the boy had saved himself as “Princey” with a star emoji right next to it.
This time, he entered the library with an amused expression.
✾✾✾✾
Roman kept repeating in his mind that it wasn’t his fault.
Yes, it was Firday. Yes, he had gone the rest of the days without a single word to Virgil, not even when he noticed him in the halls during break or when they either entered or left school. Some days he didn’t even see him.
Yes, he could have texted him. But it felt too weird, yet, they didn’t know each other at all! Plus they didn’t even have the script ready.
Yes, he felt like he had the weight of this play’s success completely on his shoulders and depending on him and still shied away from acknowledging it.
But Virgil kept avoiding him! He couldn’t do much without him.
If he saw him during the ten minutes break, Virgil would walk past him without a second thought as if he didn’t think he needed to talk to him.
Some other times he pretended he didn’t even see him. It was getting tough to even have his attention anymore, as if he had to be added to the mean girls table. He needed a miracle.
And maybe the deities were in his favor that day.
As Roman walked down the path that was made next to the plaza, he noticed a familiar little figure sitting on a bench with a backpack next to him and earbuds in his ears. He was watching in front of him as life flew by and didn’t notice Roman approaching at all.
« Virgil? »
The boy in front of him jerked his head up and took out both of his earbuds; his clothes looked much more worn and randomly put together, as if he had dressed himself in the dark. What got Roman the most was the quantity of dirt that was on them and … was that blood under some of his nails?
Roman dropped his bag on the bench, worry expanding in his chest. « Oh my goodness are you okay? » he made to reach for his hand, only to stop himself just in time to remind him of personal space.
Virgil gave him a confused look and brought his fingers to his eyes, close enough to examine them. « Not again. » he groaned, a huff coming out of his lips.
« Wait, I should have something. »
« You don’t have to, it’s noth- »
« Here! » Roman grabbed a box from his bag triumphantly, he took a couple of plasters and waved them in front of the other.
« Why do you even have so many? »
« What can I say, I’m a clumsy person. »
« Mh. Charming. »
« At least I rescued you! Now, show me your hands. » he ordered, but as soon as he saw Virgil’s mouth open to argue, he was ready to remark « I don’t care if you can do this by yourself, you have literally injured fingers, let me help. »
Seeing that there was no other way out of it, he complied.
As soon as he placed his hands over his fingers, Roman couldn’t help but notice how different their skin tones really were compared to one another, sure the difference was obvious at first glance, but seeing it this close was completely something else. He gently dabbed the fresh blood away with a tissue he had taken out with the box a few instants earlier.
Three plasters and a thank you later, the concerned face came back again and Virgil wanted nothing more than the sweet liberation of death. What was his deal, did he never dig on dirt as a child?
« How did you get hurt? »
Virgil simply pointed behind his shoulders, where Roman could only see a huge pile of dirt resting against a tree. He tilted his head to the side like a confused puppy, a sight the other would have found endearing if only he wasn’t so exasperated and tired.
« I’ve been working all day, Princey. »
Roman smiled at the familiar nickname, but still found confusion in his thoughts. « Aren’t you supposed to be at school? »
« It’s linked to school. Haven’t you heard of the excavations that our school is doing? »
Now that he mentioned that, he had heard a bunch of things, but never really paid attention since it was something that wasn’t related to his course.
Roman attended the Languages course, in which he could learn Spanish and French, other than his mother language, with literature comprehended, and all the experiences linked to it were the cultural exchanges during the third and fourth years.
Virgil, otherwise, was part of the Classical course, meaning that he had signed his death certificate by committing to five years of learning ancient Greek and Latin plus the respective literature as main subjects. But other than that and the famous one week school trip to Greece every three years, Roman had no clue what they did other than study until they couldn’t remember their own names, just like any other student.
Yeah, they couldn’t say their school system was perfect.
« I don’t exactly know every detail. Are you guys doing this? »
« Kind of. What we’re doing is carry on with the work we did the past two years, where we had opened other excavations. Let’s say we’re looking for clues. We’re supervised by an actual archaeologist though. »
« That’s so cool! Did you find any gold? » Virgil wasn’t really expecting such excitement coming from Roman. Apart from the all too familiar question, he often found his interlocutors to be pretty uninterested by the topic.
« No gold, but … remember last Tuesday? » Roman nodded attentively.
« On that morning, during one of Mr. Richardson’s lessons, one of our classmates video-called us saying there was an urgent matter to show us. They had found possibly a Roman coin. » he tried to bite back the smile that threatened to form on his lips at the joyful memory, but nothing could take away that particular twinkle in his eyes.
« Are you serious?! That’s wonderful, what if you find a hidden treasure? »
« Unlikely, but it would be nice. »
« Wow. » Roman breathed out, staring at the scene beside his … new acquaintance? « How did you hurt yourself, anyway? »
« See that pile of dirt? I’ve been scanning every bucket full of soil that was thrown in there. My job was searching in the dirt for possible relics that were missed out while others did the digging. We installed a little assembly line. And running your fingers through that for hours makes you sore I guess. »
« That doesn’t seem very fun, though. »
Virgil shrugged. « I didn’t mind. I like working by myself, especially when the job is as simple as it is important. » And it was true, it wasn’t like the archaeologist put him there because he was just hopeless with the other instruments, every little clue was important and looking for them was a crucial point that can be easily taken care of if you’re a perfectionist.
Plus, the archaeologist seemed to have taken a liking into Virgil, so that didn’t make him feel left out at all.
« Even though, today one of my classmates came to help me. » the boy turned to see that Roman was still listening to him, with no intention of changing the subject. That was new, too.
« You know those terribly annoying ones? He slowed down our chain to the point that he had to argue with this girl that was in dire need of empty buckets while we still had all of them full because he wanted to look through every inch of dirt before handing it out. » he let out a deep sigh, as if he had just been venting for hours.
« That was pretty idiotic, what happened then? »
« Uh, well, we went back to working, just as I was doing before he came to help. »
Roman snorted, imagining the scene in front of his eyes. « So he made a fuss only for it to go back as before and prove him wrong. I’d say he’s pretty amazing. »
« Yeah. » Virgil agreed, « Anyway, sorry for rambling. » he added in a lower tone, while checking his phone for notification, before putting it away quickly.
Roman arched his eyebrow at his words. « As someone who whines constantly, I don’t really think you should worry. »
At least, that succeeded to steal a chuckle from the tired one.
« Did you find anything? » Virgil was really starting to believe this guy couldn’t have a minute of pure silence.
« Well, there’s always a couple of bones, some weird ferric objects, teeth and … » he stopped, remembering the event of the week before.
This time, a wide smile appeared before he could stop it as he searched through his phone’s camera gallery; it was the one thing he was real proud of, possibly the prettiest of his findings.
He handed the phone over to Roman, whose eyes widened at the sight, in front of him he could see a pic of a piece of ceramic with white, brown, yellow and blue decorations, dirt was still covering it, but you could already make out how beautiful it was.
« You found this in here? »
« Yes, it was amazing. I was standing there, » he pointed to a vague direction in front of the dirt pile, excitement rising in his chest as he remembered. « and someone was throwing the dirt on the pile and I recognized the bottom of the piece. We had already found other ceramics and I was hoping it was one too. So I picked it up as soon as I spotted it and there were at least three inches of dirt on top. I moved it away with my thumb and I was met with that decoration. I think I might have yelled. » he leaned in to take another look at the pic, as if never satisfied with it.
Roman certainly didn’t miss how bright he appeared when he was talking about the excavation, all the tiredness was gone and the pain in his whole body caused by eight hours of work was long forgotten. He looked genuinely happy, a contrast to his unusual dark and broody persona.
« Did you choose you university yet? » he had a thought, while handing the phone back, which could have maybe helped the injured boy.
« Jumping a bit? Uh, no, honestly I have no idea. »
« Ever thought of doing something with archaeology? »
« Uhm … » Virgil tapped his fingers on his palm. It wasn’t like he hadn’t considered the possibility in the past, but he had been told that it was probably too hard and maybe too boring from his point of view. On the other hand he truly enjoyed working in the site …
« You still with me, buddy? You don’t have to choose in the next five minutes. »
« Shut up, I was thinking. »
« Your thinking is too loud. »
« And here I was considering you as actually not that bad. »
« I know you secretly admire me. »
« The important thing is you believe that. »
Their wise and profound conversation was interrupted by Virgil’s ringtone going off, he picked up, had a brief talk and tucked the phone away in his pocket.
« My mother’s arrived to pick me up. » he informed, pointing at a car parked a few feet away from them.
They both stood up, but none of them made to move at all.
« Uh, I was thinking … » Roman struggled to find the right words, as if anything he said might offend Virgil at any given moment. « I don’t want to pressure you or anything, but maybe we could meet up sometimes to talk about the play? Or I could start helping you as soon as we get the scripts. »
Virgil made a face, as if he had been trying to forget a bad nightmare and had just been reminded of it. Still, he had no right to escape that any further, and he was already anxious about not being able to make it in time, even before he could start learning his lines. So maybe starting to work on it sooner wasn’t that bad of an idea.
« Sounds good. » he hesitated, not sure how to continue, when an idea sparked in his mind. « Maybe I could give you some insight on the tragedy. »
« That’d be awesome! When are you free? »
Hah. « During week-days I’m busy until five p.m. everyday. At least for another week, when this project will be over. »
That explained why he was still in town at almost six p.m.
« You guys dig everyday? »
« Something like that. We’re divided into two groups and we dig every other day. When we don’t we still have to stay at school and do researches for the final exhibition. »
Roman’s eyes lit up at the last words, he was going to ask him about it the next time the occasion presented itself.
« That sucks. Okay, look, I don’t wanna steal anymore time from your beloved mother, so I’ll text about it to you later, okay? »
« Cool. » Virgil raised his hand and waved it ever so slightly.
Roman returned the good-bye and got back to his task, marching down the sidewalk, but as Virgil had just opened the door of his mother’s car, he remembered to yell “And don’t forget to get some rest, I’m starting to confuse your makeup with your dark circles!”.
Virgil got into the car with an exasperated sigh and found his mother giggling to herself while she looked at him.
« Was that a friend? »
« God I hope not. »
✾✾✾✾
Tuesday came back in a hurry, along with the theater club, some worried and some bored students. Virgil stood in the middle of “time to panic and/or cry” and “if I don’t fall into eternal slumber right now I will burn this building to the ground”.
If he could name some of the most atrocious backstabbers he had ever met, he’d instantly name his teachers: at first they told his class they’d make it easy for them since they were so busy with the project, now they pretended the students had to be more organized with their studying and homework. Tests and interrogations had been made despite them being at least nine hours at school instead of five, some even coming home later than that.
In a word, they didn’t care, it was the students’ fault.
Virgil had his back against the wall, sitting on the top step of the bleacher with his legs close to his chest, the meeting had been starting for a couple of minutes and, of course, he didn’t have anything to do except hating himself and wait for another uneventful hour to pass.
« Hey Gerard Way Too Dark, look what they gave me. »
Or maybe not.
Virgil looked up to be met with Roman standing in front of him with two binders in his hand: the two of them had agreed on meeting up only when school would let them breathe enough to find a single day where they were both free from studying. Which was yet to be a thing.
The beloved actor handed him one of the binders, it read the title of the play, the author and the characters. He didn’t like how his role was the very first one on the list.
« At last. » he dryly commented, flipping the pages quick enough to not read a single actual word out of it.
Roman sat down next to him and examined the first page, as if looking for some kind of unspoken treasure, then he turned to take out a stash of highlighters Virgil had no clue where he kept. He showed them to him, waiting for him to pick a color.
By the looks of them, they seemed brand new and neatly arranged in the colors of the rainbow. Virgil picked out the lilac one, he had always preferred the gentler colors, it made it easier to study with the lights on.
His colleague chose the red one and began going through the pages and highlighting all the lines he had to learn as Pentheus.
Silently, Virgil did the same with the lines Dionysus said, recalling the scenes as he went through them. Though … he noticed there were far too many. He never realized how impossible it looked in his eyes until he had it plainly laid out in front of him.
Great, you’re going to mess this up, you won’t ever be able to do this in time. Plus you’re probably going to forget everything the moment right before going on stage. Who thought this was going to be a good id-
« Are you okay down there? »
He didn’t realize he was rubbing at his face with his hands, while trying to shake off the storm forming in his mind. In doing so, he had also let the marker fall to the wooden step with a clatter, which caught the other’s attention.
« Yeah, ’m just tired. » he managed to let out through his fingers in a muffled sound.
Roman made a humming noise, then proceeded to cast aside all his stuff and let himself relax against the wall. « Then I’d say we call it a day and sleep until it’s time to part ways. »
Virgil looked at him, surprise written all over his face, wasn’t he supposed to work even harder than normal because of the occasion? Either way, he mirrored the boy, pulling up his hood so that he could find some comfort.
« I think I’m too worried about all this mess, » he retorted, gesturing at his script. « to be able to even close my eyes. »
« Then tell me about it. »
He considered the option, he did actually promise him he’d do it before, besides he’d be distracting himself from the impending doom, be actually productive and explaining the tragedy to the actor. A double win for both parties.
« The story is centered around this group of Bacchantes that came from Asia and want to enter Thebes and spread their cult, they’re also guided by a lone nomad that none knows is actually Dionysus, the founder of the cult itself. » he turned to face Roman, in a silent “tell me where I lose you” manner.
« They are stopped by Pentheus, now king of the city, son of Agave and nephew of Cadmus, the founder of Thebes. Tiresias is a famous seer that understands the potential of the cult and invites Cadmus to preach the god with him. They try to reason with Pentheus, but it’s all in vain. In the meantime, while this king is busy insulting the cult, Dionysus makes all the women of the city go mad and follow the Maenads. »
« Payback? »
« More like first warning. » Virgil counted to one on his right hand for emphasis. « After that, Pentheus sent his soldiers to capture him. And they succeeded, he didn’t resist and kept up his act, only to free himself of the chains thanks to his magic. When Pentheus found him, Dionysus pretended he was helped by the god and began charming him until the king gave in. »
« You mean, how he made him dress up as a Maenad? »
« Yes, but not only he did that, he drove him crazy, too. » did anyone else ever notice the slight green spots in Roman’s brown eyes or was it just the trick of the light? Virgil couldn’t tell, so he decided to explain further. « Pentheus claimed to be seeing double and having hallucinations. He was also very careful of his clothes, hair and posture, he wanted to be the perfect Maenad. He tried to convince himself it was for disguise purposes, but in my opinion he was rather enjoying that dress-up. »
« Really? » Roman questioned, he still had to look into his character, the more he knew about him, the better he could portray him. He always took every bit of information he could find, to the point in which he could somehow relate to them or at least be able to link him and the role. That way, he was able to love acting as every single one of them.
« You need to read their last conversation. Even you would say that at first glance. Anyway, the play ends with the Bacchantes shredding to pieces the body of Pentheus. The practice is called “sparagmòs”. After that Agave and Cadmus have a touching scene and it ends there. A bit shocking for her since she just killed her son, but the god made sure the women all saw a beast instead. »
« That’s cruel, though. »
« Princey, he disrespected a fucking god, dying is the least that could happen to him. »
There was the nickname again. And, as if on cue, Roman’s lips twitched into a small smile that disappeared right after. He wasn’t aware of the reason why he didn’t want to get caught, but … did Virgil really not remember?
« He didn’t give him a chance to apologize! »
« Then again, the cult of the Bacchantes includes a ritual where a human needs to be sacrificed. If he had ever been sorry, Dionysus would have probably ordered him to sacrifice himself so that he could be satisfied and purified by his action. »
« Okay, okay. » Roman put his hands up in surrender. « I recognize I’m talking to a smart one over here, I give up. » he pretended he was waving a white flag to his side.
Virgil chuckled at his words. « I’m actually just average, but I can be passionate about some things, too. »
« Just average? I doubt all of your classmates still remember the entire plot of a tragedy and also can provide conspiracy theories. »
« Conspiracy- what are you talking about? »
« You know I’m right, you were totally on the verge of geeking out about this one. C'mon who’s your favorite character? » the actor mocked resting his face on his palms while a sly expression surrounded him.
« I will throw you off the stairs the next chance I have. »
« Good luck with that since you can’t even reach. »
Oh that was the last fucking straw.
Virgil turned his head to look at him in the eyes so rapidly that Roman feared his neck would give in and break right then and there. But the most disturbing image was the rage that was forming around the boy’s aura.
Okay, maybe it wasn’t the wisest thing to-
Virgil surged forward in a sudden movement and the actor jumped away pleading for salvation, it was only when he heard a foreign laugh that he turned around only to be met with the same dark and stormy guy, doubled over himself with laughter, teasing Roman.
« Did you seriously think I was going to attack you? »
« You can be scary sometimes, shut up! » heat began running in Roman’s cheeks out of embarrassment and he pretended nothing happened while Virgil quieted down next to him.
It was exactly in that moment that the meeting was called off.
As Roman followed him to the library, he wondered if that was going to be a regular thing after-
You idiot, this is the last week of your project.
« Oh, by the way. » Virgil stopped at the top of the stairs. « Don’t take it personally if I brush you off or disappear for the next few days, but the exhibition’s coming and I still have no idea what to say. »
« Talking about efficiency. » the actor rolled his eyes, recalling a few other examples he could give on the marvelous organization of teachers.
« Yeah, our teacher gave us tons of useful information. » he dead-panned, approaching the library’s doors.
« I will forever respect you for putting up with Mr. Richardson. »
That was able to get a chuckle out of Virgil.
« See you around, Pentheus. »
And with that, Roman was left walking home by himself with the warm feeling of having made a new possible friend spreading in his chest.
✾✾✾✾
It was Saturday morning when he noticed the fliers hanging around school. They showed a bunch of excavation pics and the subject of an archaeological exhibition centered around the school’s town. Roman took note of the date: it was exactly that same day!
So that was how he found himself during afternoon pacing around the plaza and stepping into an old tower, where a little crowd of at least fifteen people of all ages were standing and listening attentively to a student. There was only a little group of them, which he figured was because the exhibition took place multiple times during the week.
He just wondered if he had been lucky enough to find …
As he made his way through the front, so that he could see all the materials and boards exposed he heard the female voice say « Now I will turn it over to my classmate, Virgil! »
As soon as he heard his name, he followed her gaze and finally met an unusual sight: instead of the usual hoodie, he wore a black button up shirt and skinny dark blue jeans that might as well have been mistaken for the same other color. So he did know how to be fancy if he wanted.
Before he began explaining, he noticed Roman standing right next to their theater teachers and bit back a smile. He didn’t recall inviting him, actually he hadn’t wanted anyone he knew to witness him mess everything up as he was used to do. So what was he doing there?
Virgil welcomed everybody once again, then turned over to all the materials exposed.
And when he started talking, Roman was enthralled.
He didn’t know if it was the way the words rolled down his tongue, how he brushed the objects as if they were sacred treasures that would turn into dust at the slightest touch, or the sparkle in his eyes when he took in everybody’s attention and curiosity.
But there was a thing he did recognize: it was passion, that was definitely what he was radiating, the one emotion he knew all too well which helped him getting his public hanging at the edge of their seats.
And this time, he was the hooked one.
The two locked eyes multiple times, Virgil was surprised enough to find comfort in having someone to constantly smile at him, or in Mrs. Eagan’s nodding, in all those mouthed “you’re doing great”. He couldn’t stop going back at them everytime he looked up.
Before anyone knew it, his time was over and the group moved onto the last part of the exhibition, which was outside; the crowd followed the last student to the site that was still open and the remaining students in the room sighed with relief as Mr. Richardson followed them too for the final thanks.
Some minutes and a standing ovation later, Roman was already back into the small room as bright as ever, walking toward his favorite little archaeologist.
Virgil paced towards him at the same time, hissing a “what are you doing here?” while a small grin let itself spread on his face.
With no warning and an abrupt move, Roman’s arms had already wrapped themselves around the other boy’s upper chest, lifting him a little in the process.
Well, that was definitely new.
Not being used to such excitement, Virgil was only able to awkwardly return the hug after an initial moment of vacillation. Seeing his energy on stage was a thing, experiencing it like that was completely something else, but deep in his heart he knew it wasn’t a habit he wouldn’t have liked to adapt to.
Wait, what was that thought coming from? Why would he have to adapt to anything, he was just going to help him through acting and that was it.
Still, a new friend wasn’t a bad idea either …
« You did amazing! » was what Virgil heard after being released from the embrace, but not quite completely as Roman was still holding onto his arms.
He blinked a few times. « What are you talking about, I messed up and started stuttering at one point- »
« Oh shut up and let me compliment you, I didn’t even remember you did, king of modesty. »
« More like king of self-deprecation. »
« Can you stop for once in your life? »
Right in the short amount of time they weren’t talking, a single line caught their attention.
« Look at all this trash. »
What?
« Yeah, these are all so obviously fake. »
Thunderstorms.
Thunderstorms and lightning, howls of rage formed in Virgil’s chest, burning in a bonfire which heat traveled through his blood and reached his eyes only to darken them with fury.
His body stiffened, he wanted to scowl at them and tell them how wrong they were, just how dare them invalidate all the hard work of three weeks?
« Oh, Virgil! » Roman seemed to distract him, but he had a plan in mind as he moved both of them close to the materials table. « Remember that day I visited you while you guys were digging? »
But there wasn’t any- was he onto something? « Oh, yeah, you were walking home from school and you decided to stop. » he played along, as his friend nodded, making sure to be heard by the rude couple.
In the meantime, one of the students had gone out to update their teacher on the situation.
« Yeah, when you found that beautiful ceramic piece! » Roman turned to recognize the piece he had seen in the pic he had been shown, then pointed it. « Is it that one? »
« Yes, I can pick it up for you. » Virgil did so as he spoke.
« Wow, it’s even more gorgeous. »
« We had a hard time cleaning everything, so we tried to do the best job we could. Getting dirt out of bones is also … not super easy. »
« You guys are awesome. » Roman kept glancing around the room arranged for the exhibition, while the now embarrassed couple decided to leave under the incinerating stare of Mr. Richardson who had just came in to witness the situation.
Everybody in the room went to either grin or laugh inside, while the two boys shared a high five.
After making sure everything was under control, the teacher decided to begin cleaning up the place, so all the guests that stayed to chatter were dismissed.
« Hey, uh … » Virgil struggled to get out his voice, a little for being tired, a little because in moments of shyness his tone would go out as nothing more than a simple mutter. « Thank you for earlier and … also for coming, I guess. »
« Both of them were my utter pleasure. » Roman had a thing for being extra, and if he chose that aesthetic, he better had to stick to it by doing a theatrical bow at his friend.
« You are a nerd. »
« With style! »
« Whatever helps you sleep at night. » Virgil turned around to face the tower and began walking away. « See you around, Princey. »
There went another one.
Roman had to giggle quietly to himself, every single time his mind traveled to that one particular moment back in the first year when-
« You know, this is what I was talking about. »
He felt a presence walking by his side, suddenly, and found Mr. Eagan glaring at him with an almost nostalgic look.
« I’ve been telling him for years that he has the acting potential. » she sighed while Roman simply nodded along. « He’s been getting better, you see this isn’t the first exhibition they do, I’ve seen them all. »
« Oh, really? »
« Yes. And you can totally sense how much emotion he’s putting, you can tell he’s invested. »
« I agree, I’ve had the occasion to see that. »
« And honestly I feel bad for forcing him into this play thing … but I’m sure he’s going to shine. I’m so proud of him. » she smiled at herself, then stopped in her tracks and looked up at her student. « And I’m also sure you’ll do a good job. Bring out his talent, Roman. In your own special way. »
He remained speechless for a moment, just how much trust did these teachers actually have in both of them? He found it endearing, he felt almost as if they had some kind of motherly appreciation towards them.
« Thank you. We’ll work very hard on this one, you’ll see! »
They exchanged their farewells and Roman headed home, this time by himself, having all kinds of thoughts in his mind.
But most of all, he felt worried.
All of a sudden, it seemed like a blank page was being replaced in his head instead of all the knowledge apprehended through his life.
He had no idea how to start helping Virgil.
✾✾✾✾
Despite the initial awkwardness, things had begun to go way better than both of them had imagined. The occasional staying late after the theater meetings had allowed them to grow closer, so much that they at least shared a few words during break every day at school. And that was a huge effort for Virgil as he preferred to stay in class where almost none hanged around and simply scroll through his phone, waiting for the last two dreadful hours of lessons.
And, well, random texts weren’t late to arrive to the party, too.
Princey: okay but can we talk about what an idiot Pentheus is?
Vee: this is a weird midnight text to get, but go off I guess
Princey: I’m serious! Come on, like why don’t you just let people do their thingsss
Vee: Oh you’re taking this to heart, alright
Princey: Yeah?? Am I not supposed to be emotionally invested in my own play?
Vee: You’re talking as if you’ve written it
Princey: Maybe I did
Vee: gasp are you Euripides reincarnated
Princey: The one and only
Vee: My apologies sir, you have all the rights to whine about your own plot
Vee: I also have no clue how you know english
Princey: It’s the muses’ power!
Vee: Melpomene?
Princey: Bless you
Vee: Wow okay, go to sleep
Princey: Sleep is for the weak
Vee: And you’re gonna be weak in the morning so it really doesn’t matter
Princey: Alright, mum, why would you stay up then?
Vee: Reasons
Princey: Are you still scrolling through Tumblr and sticking to your natural emo kid persona?
Vee: ouch
Vee: no,  but I’d love to
Princey: mhh then you forgot to do homework or study?
Vee: You know me, I’m too anxious about my parents’ judgment to do that
Princey: demanding parents?
Vee: sorta.
Princey: sore topic?
Vee: Yup.
Princey: Alright then, you’re watching a movie? An anime?
Vee: No, I’m just talking to an idiot who won’t go to sleep
Princey: Oh I see, sounds like a total badass guy fighting the system
Vee: Yeah, fighting his body’s shut down system if he doesn’t get enough sleep.
Princey: bold of you to say that when we’re in the same situation
Vee: listen we’re talking about you stay focused
Princey: you know I’m right
Princey: C'mon why are you still up
Vee: no reason tbh
Vee: I just can’t seem to fall asleep so I’m tyring myself out until I can pass out on my bed
Princey: thaaat doesn’t seem very healthy
Vee: I never said I wanted to take care of myself
Princey: LOVE  YOURSELF BITCH
Vee: HAH
Vee: no.
Princey: i will make you!!
Princey: one day we’ll have a big relaxation day and you will be able to see the beauty in yourself!!
Vee: sounds unrealistic i’m in
Princey: come on work with me emo nightmare
Vee: i’m too lazy to live i’m sorry
Princey: then why don’t you just s l e e p
Vee: bc my sleep schedule is a mess and i cant seem to even shut my eyes everything in my life is going straight in the trash can and uhhhhhh yeah everything sucks
Princey: woah slow down
Princey: okay look you’re having me a bit concerned here
Vee: haha no it’s the usual daily stuff for me
Princey: ……….. it shouldn’t be????
Vee: eh
Princey: hey, would you answer if I called you?
Vee: if this is because of what i’ve just said, you’re worrying too much
Princey: nah it’s just for a distraction
Princey: and maybe you’ll be able to fall asleep
Vee: are you implying your voice is boring or you want to sing me a lullaby?
Princey: i’ll pretend i didn’t read the first part but i’ll have you know i have a very beautiful singing voice
Vee: pf alright i’m not entirely convinced
Princey: i’ll buy both of us coffee at the vending machine tomorrow morning before the first lesson starts
Vee: okay i’m sold, hit me up
✾✾✾✾
« This is unacceptable! I’m sorry, our friendship has to end here, I’m leaving. »
« I’m telling you, I have my reasons. »
« You can’t just simply dislike Hercules! »
Virgil sighed in defeat and resigned in his plastic seat; Christmas holidays had been around for a week, new year’s was already approaching and two youngsters had decided to spend an afternoon together with the excuse of reading some lines out of their scripts and helping each other out.
It wasn’t really the first time they did that, plus with the arrival of winter it was a nice excuse to be comforted by a warm cup of hot chocolate with whipped cream.
Just like they were doing in that moment, only that it seemed that they had completely forgotten about the play because of how much they were invested in other topics. Such as, obviously, Disney movies.
« It’s not that I don’t like it, it’s just … so wrong. »
« Oh my- it’s not Percy Jackson, it’s Disney, they’re allowed to take some creative liberties. »
« I know, but I didn’t watch it as a child, I saw it recently- »
« How dare you. »
« -shut up. What I mean is: my studies have ruined its likability. »
Roman closed his eyes and put his hands together in front of his face in an exasperated manner. « Then let’s hear these freaking reasons, enlighten my blindness, o wise one! »
Virgil couldn’t help but smirk as the other one huffed. « First of all, thank you for the compliment. »
« But, see, the first thing that got me was the character of Phil. The actual Philoctetes wasn’t a satyr, he was a hero that fought in the Trojan war who also happened to be Hercules’ friend at some point. »
« Well, they were linked in the end! »
« Let me finish. All the deeds that Phil claimed to have made? All those heroes he trained? Bullshit. Everything was done by Chiron, the only wise and composed centaur of greek mythology. And like centaurs were thought as savage beasts, satyrs were always linked to Dionysus and described as libidinal creatures. Philoctetes would have probably felt insulted. »
« Your studies may have ruined your view but you’re ruining my childhood right now. » Roman muttered the words as a childish pout formed on his lips.
« Ah, also Megara was a city, not a person. » said Virgil with nonchalance.
« WHAT. » the wide-eyed actor jumped in his seat and surged forward a little, blinking a few times.
Without expecting it, Virgil’s composed face contorted with a snort, which then grew into giggles and then again transformed into a genuine and amused laughter that couldn’t stop.
He tried to breathe in. « Princey, you- » he cut himself off as another wave of giggles hit him, so he held one hand up as if to tell him to wait until he could properly compose himself.
And Roman knew he otherwise would have felt offended, or at least in a playful way, he knew normally he would have instantly asked what was the matter. But he couldn’t really shake off the feeling of wanting to protect and carve this picture into his memory until it was the only thing he could remember.
And he truly wanted to share that angelic laughter, participate to the mirthful moment, yet he found himself solely staring at the unusual sight in pleasant disbelief at how stunning that scene was.
He could merely twitch his lips upwards and consider how much he adored hearing the nickname in such an entertained voice.
Something inside Roman clicked as Virgil finally gained enough breath, and he knew he was done for.
« Sorry, uh, » he was finally able to breathe out. «  I was actually messing with you. She did exist. »
He looked him in the eyes and all Roman could think was “finally”.
After a beat, noticing the other didn’t respond and assuming he was upset or something, he continued. « Though she and their children were afterwards killed by Hercules according to some. Others think he killed his children and Megara compelled him to commit suicide. Awful stories for great heroes, I guess. »
Roman, who was still starstruck, was only able to comment. « Breathtaking. »
Virgil made a face and lowered the cup he was raising to his lips. « What? »
« Uh … what? No I was just- the TV! Behind you, yes. I was commenting that. »
The confused one turned ever so slightly to quickly glance at the old black screen facing his back. « Alright, I won’t question your weird obsession with old style televisions. »
Nailed it.
Their discourse went on escalating to different topics, but never once brushing the fact that they met to keep up their theater practice, like good procrastinating students. It wasn’t like they were avoiding it on purpose, for the first time they felt like spending quality time with each other was their main priority.
« Okay, listen, Tripping in the Darkness. I went on a cruise once and even there I was able to reveal my beautiful voice. »
« So sorry for the passengers. »
« I should have left you outside freezing in the cold. » Roman scoffed after a beat.
« But you didn’t. »
« I’m starting to reconsider. »
« We both know you would never do it. »
« I forgive you only because you’re cute. » oh wait, oh wha- Roman immediately hid behind his cup, drinking the last remaining of his warm beverage. He hoped that the heat would rush off of his cheeks by the time he had finished.
« Wow, I’m flattered. » Virgil didn’t leave his sarcastic tone and didn’t seem to have noticed anything different, until he snorted out loud when he was met with Roman’s face after he lowered the cup.
Roman’s heart sank, was he still blushing? Was he already onto him? That was bad, that was-
« You got … » Virgil’s voice got back to being amused and he gestured towards his face. Oh, great, he had a chocolate-stained face now. Just what he needed.
« Where? Is it gone? » he frantically kept on asking as he wiped around his mouth and cheeks with his bare hand.
His friend shook his head. « Not even close. »
On a scale on one to Roman’s worst embarrassing moments compilation, he would have probably found himself on top of that very ranking, because after that Virgil simply reached for the container on the little table.
« For starters, you take a tissue. » while he did so, Roman could only watch as his friend  gently rubbed away the spot on the bridge of his nose. Oh. The cup did touch it earlier.
Alright that was awkward and I’m stupid, let’s move on.
But no, his brain had decided to short circuit and leave him to his impulsiveness; out of the blue, he grabbed Virgil’s wrist before he pulled away completely.
Virgil blinked, confused once again by his behavior. « Uh, what’s up? »
That’s when Roman’s mind finally snapped to reality and, of course, he panicked to find the best excuse he could permit, so he slid both of his hands to cage Virgil’s own. « You’re super cold! » he noticed, lowering their hands to rest on the table.
« Yeah? It’s minus degrees outside? And I’m often anxious? »
« Oh, right. » why was he feeling more sympathetic than usual? « Then, I shall protect you from both! »
« By holding my hand? »
« By making sure your heat level is within the parameters! »
« Alright, Doc. I’ll trust you. »
That was how they ended up holding hands for the rest of the day without even realizing until they had to part.
« You sure you don’t want me to accompany you to the parking lot? »
« I’m fine, don’t mind. »
They were standing out of the cafe to exchange their goodbyes, about to head for different streets and eventually go home.
« You know, you didn’t really have to pay for me, I’m not broke. » Virgil talked in little puffs of condensed air, hands in his pockets and trying to shake off the cold stinging sensation that pierced his skin.
« Oh, soft you now, »
« Is that a fucking Hamlet quote? »
« -it is my duty to ensure your well-being. Plus I know you hate talking to cashiers, so. »
« You’re the worst, but thank you. » Virgil rolled his eyes. « I still feel like I owe you one now, though. »
Well you could just kiss me whenever you feel like, a part of Roman’s brain noted. Uhm, what the fuck is your problem? Responded the other.
« Nah, I’ll probably forget it by the next time we talk. » he admitted, ignoring the weird thoughts that were happening in his mind, a mind that needed to shut up for at least a single second.
Virgil muttered an “alright” and was about to turn around and wave him off, like he always did, when he was confronted by a simple demand.
« Uh, can I, like, hug you? »
He stopped in his tracks, considering for a moment, before a “sure” escaped his lips and he started nodding.
Roman stepped closer and wrapped his arms around his chest, content and making a little pleased sound as the other returned the hug. He wasn’t sure why he was being so uncertain that day.
« Bye, Virge! » he called out as he stepped away from his friend and began walking home.
Virgil waved in return and immediately took out his phone and earbuds: after hitting shuffle he was fast to recognize the song by the first chords.
Acceptance, huh? He had discovered their song back in middle school. Boy, did he try so hard to be edgy. Still, certain songs weren’t really that bad.
Oh no, this couldn’t be more unexpected.
He had just made to turn the corner of a mansion’s fence when a realization struck him. And he was still subtly smiling because of it.
He somehow hadn’t been aware of it in the moment, probably because of their distracting conversation.
The lyrics went by in his ears and he almost didn’t even notice the words flowing in his head as that little memory of their afternoon occupied his mind.
Could this be out of line? To say you’re the only one breaking me down like this.
Roman had been brushing his thumb against his skin for almost all the time he had been holding onto his hand earlier.
He also had hugged him a little bit tighter than how he remembered back in October. And he was very excited too, that day.
And yeah, the majority of sane people would have found the situation simply nice or just a normal friendly action. But Virgil?
Come to think of it, I’m aching.
Yeah, he was already burying his face in his hoodie. God, was that heat rushing at his cheeks? Did his body really want to make it any more obvious?
On account of my transgression, will you welcome this confession?
Oh god, oh fu-
Virgil exhaled deeply and rubbed at his face with his hands, an unwelcome warm feeling spreading in his chest, it felt like as if someone was lighting a fire in there, not caring for the emotional damage that they were about to cause. Like a firework sent up in the middle of the night only to startle you enough to wake you up in a cold sweat and thumping heart.
Keep me hanging on so contagiously.
Virgil abruptly ripped the earbuds away from his ears and stuffed everything in his pockets as he leaned on his school’s gate, staring at the parking lot in front of him. His parents had yet to arrive to pick him up.
He had enough time to calm down.
« Well, I’m fucked. »
Maybe.
✾✾✾✾
Princey: HAPPY NEW YEAR V!!
Vee: yeee here’s to another shitty one
Princey: AW COME ON try to be a bit more upbeat
Vee: YEEE HERE’S TO ANOTHER SHITTY ONE!!!!
Princey: THAT’S MORE LIKE IT COMRADE
Vee: wtf okay
Princey sent a pic
Vee: are those streamers in your hair?
Vee: and … glitter?
Princey: don’t question it it’s your turn now send me something
Vee: i don’t think that’s how it works
Princey: do iiiiiit scaredy cat
Vee: fine
Vee sent a pic
Princey: .. wait
Princey: Are you in bed?
Vee: On the couch, actually
Vee: if that’s what you’re asking yes, i’m at home
Princey: and you’re not having fun? Are you okay??
Vee: yes don’t worry
Vee: i’m by myself
Princey: WHAT
Vee: gee it’s not that weird
Princey: no it’s just i thought you were out with friends
Vee: were all busy
Vee: but it’s fine, i don’t really appreciate big and loud parties
Vee: and i jump at every single loud noise so fireworks are a big no for me
Princey: you should have told me!! i would have managed something, we could have even just chilled alone
Vee: no it’s fine really, thank you
Vee: sorry to bring you down with that
Princey: oh shush
Princey: can i call you?
Vee: that’s sweet and all but i’d feel like i’m bothering you so
Princey: what are you talking about, plus there are so many people here they won’t even realize i’m gone for a while
Vee: i don’t wanna waste your time, it’s ok
Princey: but you’re not doing that!
Princey: idk can I at least visit you for some time? I don’t want you being all alone like that
Vee: no
Vee: i mean not that i don’t want you here but i’d feel guilty, i told you
Princey: you don’t have to!!
Princey: i lo kdjsdsdjk
Vee: what-
Princey: look i care about you, you’re one of my closest friends already and i love spending time with you, so if there’s a way for me to cheer you up i will gladly accept it
Vee: that is …
Vee: the gayest thing i’ve ever read
Vee: you’re a dork
Princey: i will take all that as a compliment
Vee: okay let me just
Vee: get my dog off of me
Princey: ADORABLE DOG
Vee: yeah i love her
Vee: and afterwards you can call me alright
Princey: SCORE!!
Princey: okay
Vee: one thing though
Princey: mirror mirror on the wall what’s the question botherin y'all
Vee: … i’ll pretend i’ve never read that
Vee: are you still getting me coffee tomorrow morning like that one time
Princey: if this is a subtle “do you wanna hang out here” i’m all for it, tho expect me to come up at like 11
Vee: wow you know exactly how to make things awkward everytime
Vee: okay dog’s off, you can call
Princey: on it!
✾✾✾✾
It is widely known and said that time flies by quickly when you’re either having fun, doing nothing or during the holidays. Students had reluctantly returned to their daily routines of lessons, homework and studying, trying to frame everything in the best way, so that they had at least some time to breathe between their tasks.
January, sadly, meant that the end of the first term was approaching inexorably  and the teachers suddenly realized they needed more marks than they actually had from every student in a matter of two weeks. Everything for the initial report cards that, in the end, didn’t matter at all compared to the final one.
Thanks to February, students would have some time to breathe and re-gain strength until March, which was another wave of tests in preparation for the real monster: May.
For the last years, though, February also meant that they were going to get more information about which subjects they had to focus on the most for their final exams, which could only be linked to chaos, panic and that anxious but subtle feeling that the big moment was coming.
Thankfully, the weekend existed and with it also places for poor unfortunate souls to release stress and distract themselves from the imminent danger.
And that is how we follow two fellow individuals in distress who had decided upon spending their first free time in weeks walking around town and having a nice chat during night. At least before they ended up in a little desolated playground, their scripts in front of their faces, definitely acting more dramatically than needed.
« Do you perform the rites by night or by day? » Roman leaned on one of the street lamps, permitting him to read his line and, at the same time, he widely gestured with his free hand.
« Mostly by night; darkness conveys awe. » Virgil emphasized his second line with such an ominous tone that made his friend giggle lightly.
« Oh my, I’m thrilled. »
« Okay but you’ve got to admit it’s actually a cool phrase to say. »
« Maybe if we were serious enough, my darkling. »
After Virgil’s usual “shut up and keep reading” (which he had been using for the past fifteen minutes, mind you), Roman complied. « This is treacherous towards women, and unsound. » his voice sounded almost offended, his hand trailed over his heart in a fist.
Virgil bit back a grin at the sight. « Even during the day someone may devise what is shameful. »
« This vile quibbling settles your punishment. » the taller one took a few steps forward, pointing his finger on his friend, accusatory.
« Your ignorance and impiety toward the god will settle yours. » Virgil snarled, imitating the other in pointing fingers.
Roman gasped way more dramatically than needed and placed a hand on his chest, eyes wide with disbelief. « How bold the Bacchant is, and not unpracticed in speaking! »
His acting partner intook some breath, before stopping, narrow eyed, while he read his words.
« What, is something wrong? » Roman demanded, eyes scanning the next lines before looking up.
« This is so fucking gay. » he admitted, a smile playing on his lips as he contemplated the possibility of a different turn of events in the plot.
« Dionysus and Pentheus, but make it gayer. »
« Than it already is? That’s a challenge. »
« I have something in mind. » Virgil didn’t like the mischievous look on Roman’s face. « Keep going. »
« Tell me what I must suffer; what grievous harm will you do to me? » he hadn’t noticed how fast the other was to reach him, the previous grin was still imprinted on his lips. His pace faltered only a bit, but didn’t stop when he was a few steps from his Dionysus.
« First, I will cut off your delicate curls. »  how Roman could change his tone from a mocking one to a warm and clear one, would forever be an unsolved mystery to the world. He proceeded to raise a hand to Virgil’s hair and slowly moved his bangs to the side, a knuckle brushing his cheek afterwards.
« My locks are sacred; I am growing them for the god. » Virgil played along and started to remember the lines, a result of their persistent reading every week. Not that he could really tear off his eyes from the looming figure in front of him.
« Next, give me this thyrsos from your hands. » other steps forward and Roman had trapped him against some metal bars he wasn’t aware of.
« Take it from me yourself; this is the wand of Dionysus I am bearing. » with no warning, Roman pressed his right hand, where the actual thyrsos would have been, to the bars and locked their fingers together. He leaned in even further, making sure Virgil could notice the sly sparkle in his half-lidded eyes.
« Last, I will guard your body deep in the dungeons. » his other hand gripped the bars right next to the boy’s head, literally trapping him. He had to stay in character, after all.
The leaning was slow this time, but didn’t seem to be stopping at any moment and Virgil could swear he felt his body move without his consent.
Inches apart, and Roman’s lips twitched upward. He stopped.
Virgil snorted.
Next thing they knew they were both bursting out laughing like they had just heard the best joke their favorite comedian had ever made.
« That was- » Virgil tried, after they both collapsed to the ground, weak in their knees for too much hilarity. « That was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. »
« When Pentheus and Dionysus couldn’t get any gayer. » Roman commented through an almost hysterical laughter, while part of his brain began to shut down in a ohgodwhathasjusthappenediwasabouttobutthenididntandisthisthereallife state. An everyday situation to which he was used to, of course.
« Actually, » his friend began, taking a deep breath to calm himself down. « Greek gods are very open about their sexuality. »
« Oh, yeah. Wasn’t it Zeus himself that tried to f- » Roman was instantly shushed to silence, while a pained expression grew on the other’s face.
« We don’t talk about him. »
Fair enough. They had been in comfortable silence for quite a while, sitting on the ground and enjoying the void of the night as the only sources of light showed them only certain features and details of the objects around them.
« Hey, Virge? »
The mentioned boy almost jumped at the sudden sound. « Yeah? »
Roman’s expression, fixated on something ahead of him, was somewhat between focused and in a daze.
« Did you know the teachers wanted to keep your hair growing for the play? »
« What. »
« They decided against it when they realized I actually had to cut them away during the show. »
« Why are you telling me this right now? »
« I was just thinking about … » Roman’s words lingered, as if he thought about whether or not he could disclose a secret.
About me, please say about me. Virgil shook off the bizarre thought while he waited for a response. Are you fucking kidding me? Part of his mind answered. Didn’t all those past experiences teach you anything?  Virgil found it harder to concentrate on Roman’s words now, he creased his eyebrows as if he were having a headache.
Those were in elementary school and middle school, you idiot. The other side responded. They were still valid experiences!
« Ohi. » Roman waved his hand in front of the other’s face. « Are you on this planet, sir? »
« Sadly, I still am. »
Roman rolled his eyes at that. « Dang, here I thought the aliens had gotten you. »
« You wish. »
« Anyway, I was about to get going since it’s getting pretty late even for a Saturday night. » he pulled himself on his feet, then smiled brightly and turned to his friend. « Lift home? »
« Thank god you exist. »
And Roman did really try hard to act cool and all, but he found out he couldn’t prevent his face from turning at least the weakest tint of red.
✾✾✾✾
They didn’t know how it was possible, but they made it through until April.
The last two months were a train wreck of multiple meetings between Roman’s wonderful school trip abroad, additional tests, the first exams simulations, and things getting very serious at theater club. The designs, scenes, props and costumes were all coming along neatly and, with everybody giving their all, the excitement for the play could be felt through thin air. Roman was thrilled and he thought that there wasn’t nothing else that could possibly be better than that kind of feeling.
Virgil begged to differ.
He was standing in the middle of the external part of the front of the school with a couple of other classes of his same course; they all had backpacks on their backs and a luggage held close.
Virgil was almost bouncing, unable to stay still, he started tapping his fingers on the handle of his own luggage. The anticipation was killing him, how could everybody else be so calm and casual? They were about to leave for a trip to Greece!
It was the most wanted and awaited of school trips for their course, it happened every three years and not only students were given the opportunity to confront and visit places and subjects they had studied, but also thanks to certain lovable teachers the weirdest and funniest things occurred in those trips. It was a dream come true, finally at their fingertips.
He really didn’t want to seem mean, but Virgil couldn’t stop looking at the time on his phone while one of his closest classmates trailed off talking about how energetic they felt for the trip ahead.
Until …
« Wine god! » what the f-
Virgil and his friend looked up simultaneously to be met with the vision of Roman waving one arm from the top of the external stairs and afterwards quickly running down towards them.
« I didn’t see you anywhere this morning! » he was still half-running when he spoke those words, as he reached them. He put his hands on Virgil’s shoulders.
« We didn’t really leave until now, we had a test. »
His eyes widened « What the heck? Right before a trip? »
Virgil shrugged. They had chosen it was better to do it before than afterwards.
« Well, anyway, I wanted to properly say goodbye and wish you a good travel! »
« Thank you, buddy. You really didn’t have to, aren’t you having a lesson right now? » Virgil raised one eyebrow, uncertain.
Roman showed him one of his stupidly charming grins and put his hands on his hips. « I simply asked to go to the bathroom. »
« I hate to break it to you, Roman, but this isn’t exactly the right way. »
« Oh, shut up. You know I wanted to see you before you headed off for the seven seas! »
« We’re literally traveling through the same sea, what are you tal- »
« It’s been a long day, let me have this. »
Virgil tilted his head to the side, they had been in school for only three hours, what exactly did that make it a long day?
His thoughts were broken by the thundering of one of his teachers who announced that everybody had to get ready since they were going to leave in a matter of minutes.
« Alright then. » Roman murmured with a slightly sad sigh, he quickly replaced his defeated expression with a smile, careful not to be discovered. « I’ll have to leave now. »
C'mon say something. His heart begged for mercy as Virgil looked back up at him and he saw two bright gray irises, the sun’s rays hitting them from the side just enough to make them look like literal crystals.
Anything would do, take your chance, tell him!
His eyes fell to the figure right next to them, still standing there and witnessing every one of their interactions. Well, maybe next time.
Roman leaned forwards and wrapped his arms around his friend’s shoulders in a tight embrace that was soon returned a bit more weakly around his waist. He felt like he was holding on him for dear life more than anything.
His hand trailed at the nape of his neck and stroked his hair for some instants, in which Virgil tightened his own hug and laughed silently on his shoulder.
« I’m not leaving forever, you know? The time zone is not even that different. »
« I know but I’ll be lonely! »
« We both know that’s not true. » Virgil released the other and patted his shoulder. « You’ll be fine and you can text me whenever you want when I’m not in the ferry. »
Roman let out a fake annoyed huff, but smiled anyway. « Have a safe trip, Virge. » he backed away, still facing him while waving a hand.
Then he turned to the other boy.
« Keep an eye on him for me, okay? »
« Will do! »
At this, Roman sprinted away towards his class and could only smirk wider when Virgil called him out with a “Oh shut up, Princey.”
Virgil met his friend’s all-knowing look as he turned away from the spot where he saw Roman disappear, not realizing he had a soft expression written over all of his face.
« Why are you- no. Listen, it’s not what you- »
His friend ignored him, dancing around him. « You’re doing flips, read my lips, you’re in love! » he sang, while Virgil buried his face in his hands since for some godforsaken reason when he was embarrassed he tended to have a weird smile on his face that made him completely implausible. He hated that, it only made people tease him even further.
Which was exactly what happened in this situation, even after Virgil had smacked him behind the head lightly and started to get going towards the bus station as their teachers had instructed.
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So I’m finally getting around to writing out a bunch of info about my Sander Sides au so I hope youre all ready--(its like 1 am im so sorry for any spelling mistakes and missed tags)
So its 1 am on a work night and I cant sleep and I’ve had lots of ideas and canon things for this au bouncing around my head for days and now TONIGHTS THE NIGHT ITS HAPPENING IM DELIVERING YOU ALL THE DETAILS AND EVERYTHING I CAN THINK OF AND TYPE 
Also please feel free to ask about this! I know I got a few new followers from all my recent sander sides art and also thanks to @sugarglider9603 reblogging some art I made of their au I got the biggest flood of exposure and attention on my art ive ever had and I have so much to thank them for, for all recent exposure ive gotten the past couple days( theyre so sweet and lovely and easy to talk to sugar deserves all the love--) and its given me a huge surge of motivation and confidence to post this. And please, my inbox is always open to talk about my aus or my art! Ask questions, send requests, send headcanons or ideas, send fluff angst im open to anything and I try to do all requests sent to me(sooner or later)
Oh oh! and please id you catch any and all the little inspirations or anything let me know
And finally this au is a LAMP au with Remile and Demus on the side
Ahem ahem anyway onto the au!!!
More under the cut so I dont flood your screen too bad!
Ok so! 
This Au was originally inspired by @residentanchor‘s amazing fanfic A Lesson in Practicality and also a little bit by @prettyinaccurate‘s fanged virgil au( I’ll get more into that further down) 
So it takes place in a (currently) unnamed bigger city I based off San Francisco and Sacramento( because I live in Cali and those are the two major cities ive really visited ya know?) The boys are all in various stages of their twenties when they move into a four bedroom apartment together: Patton Foster is the oldest of the roomies at 27, then Logan Masters at 26, Roman Prince at 24, and finally Virgil Collins at 22. They move in together because it all works out for them really, the apartment is in a good distance to all their current jobs, whether by bus or even in Pat’s case in walking distance and with all four of them it was well affordable and was pretty nice. I mean hey it even came with a little communal balcony ( since theyre on third floor of the building) 
Things are understandably a little rocky at first , i mean isnt it always though?
Virgil has alot of anxiety and so he tends not to talk really at all at the beginning unless he ABSOLUTELY had to, mostly communicating in noncomittal noises and soft grumbles, and he was fresh out of collage and barely two years into his job and out on his own for the first time and he wasnt really ready for it either like christ too many people
Patton was bright bubbly and caring. This wasnt his first rodeo with roomies, I mean cmon, hes been sharing a room with his older brother Damian(deceit) on and off almost all his freakin life, nor was it his first time living on his own with strangers(hes lived in two different parts of two when he was job hopping before he settled down in his current part time job)
Roman was extroverted loud and exciteable, he too was used to sharing his living space( he had TWO siblings after all) and before he had moved into the apartment he had tried living on his own and with other roommates while he attended collage, but those just didnt work out well ( he ended up staying with his older brother Remy in his studio apartment across the city while he finished out that semester and searched for a job to keep an income.
Logan was serious minded stern toned and confident, he had a minor degree in teaching that he was slowly repursueing and had been out on his own for awhile before he had moved in. And though cold at first he soon found his group of housemates...enjoyable.
Its about a month into them living together that they learn exactly why despite slowly getting close and getting to know each other Virgil still kept a wide distance: He had entirely sharp teeth.
“ I dunno....I was born with them..theyve always been a sharp pain in my ass...” - virgil, about his teeth
Of course just having sharp teeth wasnt bad enough oh no. You see a few years back when he was about 18 he was young and dumb and made horrifically stupid and reckless decisions under peer pressure and ended up doing something that not only pointedly (haha oh god im not funny) chipped his front teeth but it fucked up his teeth pretty majorly, he went from having a normal overbite to almost having a goddamn underbite and crooked all his teeth, and the only way to fix it( because somehow miraculous for all the damage done it turned out to be mostly reversable aside from the chipping) was getting braces to realign his teeth. So he’s had pretty purple braces over his fangs since he was 18 and they werent expected to come off until he was AT LEAST 25 and he was insecure about them. ( he got mocked for them through his two and a half years of junior collage)
Once the gang finds out they are understanding and helpful and dont make a big deal about it( though virgil gains a significant amount of more vampire related nicknames from roman)
Once they get close and comfortable around each other the apartment is pretty warm and lively! 
Virgil works at the art store as an assistant manager and head stocker( a bit of a dream come true since he was an art student)
Roman works as a part time waiter at a family resturant as well as working at a nearby theater( he was of course a lovely theater major) 
Patton worked at a nearby cafe and bakery as a bit of everything! He helped wait tables, serve behind the counter, and helped in the back in the kitchen( the owners were family friends and he’d been working there almost four to five years at that point, boi knows how to do everything) 
Logan worked at a big name bookstore, and also provided tutoring sessions for highschool students on the side by commision
More FACTS~~
Family ages for the big families go as follows:
Fosters: Damian(28), Patton(27)
Prince: Remy(26), Roman(24, older twin by 10 minutes), Remus(24, younger twin)
Emile is 27 and is a licensed therapist and works as a counselor for young adults that volunteers at the nearby library to ready to children
Remy works as a coffee barista in Emile’s building
Remus does alot of odd jobs, kinda working as an independent for hire and gets a surprising steady flow of work and pay. Hes still a trash man though, but hes a successful trash man( partly thanks to Damian calling in favors with connections)
Damian works at a law firm slowly moving into the position of prosecutor
Virgil doesnt really get along with his family and at some point Emile offers to take virgil in as his adopted brother, with Damian assuring him if he wanted concrete legal papers to start changing his last name, cutting ties with his family, anything needed for it he’d see to it that they’d be providing(something our boi really appreciates)
Remy visits Emile on his breaks since hes literally just...two hallways down and vice versa
Damian and Remus live together in the next, slightly smaller city over because Damian’s work transferred him to a different office in order for him to keep moving up in the ranks so to speak. 
Hes also good at what he does.
Family nights happen whenever they can
Patton got to teach them how to cook alot of complicatied dishes from scratch, a bonding time he adores
Roman got Virgil an Espeon hoodie after they all start dating and virgil loves it and wears it alot around the house because its a thicker hoodie and warm( though he tries to ignore the big ears and the obnovious tail
Virgil also loves visiting Roman’s work on what Ro likes to refer to as “ hellish days” AKA kids day which means goofy kid friendly theme days. His favorite was probably alice in wonderland day when Roman was Tweedle Dee
Roman played J.D at the local theater and likes to hum some of the his songs to switch up the Disney
The balcony is covered in houseplants and and a corner of old blankets and pillows to sit and chill on
Once a month Logan and Patton have what is affectionately referred to as the Cat Discourse
After any particularly rough days at work Patton tends to massage Logan’s shoulders and back to make sure Lo doesnt get any really bad stress knots
in return when Logan sees Patton’s head a hard day he makes Patton’s favorite drink and pulls him into a hug and let the older man fall asleep in his arms while they watch movies
Pat and roman sense each other’s bad days and order in some cliche diner food and hole up in pattons room with Pattons computer and relax the shittiness away with comedy specials and movies 
Likewise Virgil has a knack of picking up Roman’s bad days and always grabs a couple glasses and a bottle kinda cheap wine and they end up curling up together on Romans bed marathoning Disney movies on Virgil’s laptop 
and when Virgil closes himself off more than normal Logan manages to lure him out of his room and they end up sitting out on the balcony quietly talking and stargazing
so loving and fond and soft with each other
you hurt one of them you gonna get BEAT by the others. 
Speaking of getting beat, never EVER mess with Roman or Remus in Remy’s proximity
Remy Andrew Prince can and WILL fuck you right up if you hurt his little brothers. He’s protective.
and where Remy will rearrange your face Damian will ruin you mentally and legally if you so much as mistreat a single freckle on his little brother’s face, despite knowing that Patton is fully capable of taking care of himself. 
Everyone protects Virgil, dont mess with or hurt virgil or you have the pack coming for ya throat
aaaaaaaaaaaaaand thats all I have for right now! Of course more will be added but now its almost three in the morning and I have work at 1:30pm and im sleepy finally! But I hope you guys like this! And please, feel free to talk to me about it, my inbox is always open!!
Taglist: @phantommoonpeople @sweetsweetemo @loganberrysanders
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oh my god. Ok so I just scrolled through your blog and my heart hurts because there is so much love and just so much stuff I can relate too and I just ahhh damnnn it I cant even but like can I please have the story of your relationship with this girl your with? please? i'm a hopeless romantic I feel too much I love so hard my own love life is complicated but i know the kind of love you talk about thats exactly how i love the love of my life too so yours is a story I need to hear
ok so. it all started on April 31st, 2018. i reblogged one of those ask games and she sent me an emoji that said “i’m too scared to talk to you but i think you’re great” and i was like do it!!! and she did!!!! she texted me after i had already gone to sleep tho, so i only answered the next day. but then we talked all day. and the next. and the next. and we never ran out of things to talk about and even only knowing her for a few days i already felt comfortable enough with her to talk about anything?? it was wild. since day 1 we’ve had this connection that i’ve never had with anyone else and its my favorite thing in the world. after like a week we already had a bunch of inside jokes, something that i’d never had before, and i was already crushing on her. ok so we became very close friends like immediately, and i mostly ignored my crush on her bc i thought she didn’t like me back and usually i’d get meaningless crushes on everyone at first before i met her. but then this other girl and i started flirting and i realized i didnt like her bc i liked c too much, so i broke things off and kinda went like “oh shit this is real” and decided that i’d just stay friends with c until i eventually couldnt take it anymore and had to tell her abt my feelings bc thats how i am. anyways ok cool meanwhile i made her watch the good place on rabb.it with me which will be relevant later.
ok so fast forward to may 21st or something around that time. its time to sleep bc i have school the next day so we say goodnight, but then i guess she says something or reblogs something and i get sad bc i realize she doesnt like me back. so i make some hashtag sad posts abt yearning and then i realize i told her i was going to sleep and i didnt want her to think i didnt want to talk to her so i text her again and say like “ok i was going to go to sleep but then i got sad abt my crush” and SHE GOES “you have a crush????????” and im there like. what in the hell bc not only did i not try to hide it At All, i constantly posted about it and had an entire tag about her and i thought it was pretty obvious. so anyways i go “yes?? i thoought you knew that?? im literally always posting about it??” and she asks me to talk abt the crush and who it is. i say “just stalk the tag if u want, im going to sleep” then shes like “nO WAIT WHO IS IT” and im like. blatantly ignoring that and my heart is already beating out of my chest but she Really wants to know and then at one point i say “please dont make me answer that” so shE SAYS “you’re making me think that its me” and i say “i dont know what you want me to say” and SHE GOES “I WANT YOU TO SAY THAT ITS ME BC I HAVE A HUGE CRUSH ON YOU” so i just. die. right then and there. also yknow we talk about it and its like after 1 am and im just happier than i’ve ever been. ok so 2 days later she asks me out Officially and its great and shes the cutest gf ever and she made me feel more wanted than i’d ever felt in my entire life. then 6 days later she sends me a big big big text on tumblr and long story short (bc it was kinda personal), she would be deleting her all social media for the summer.
so she was gone. and we had only dated for a week at this point, but we’d known each other for 2 months, and i already loved her. i already knew she was the love of my life. i didnt even try to move on, i’d tell people i didnt wanna move on cuz i knew i was meant to love her. i had another blog like this that i used to talk about how much i loved and missed her (so like. exactly like this). i literally reasoned with myself that like. that happened because before i met her i was in a really bad place after a terrible relationship and i was almost giving up on finding someone who actually made me feel loved bc i thought it would never happened, so i was like “ok so i was in a really bad place, so the universe brought my soulmate a little early just for a while so that i would know i had to hold on, and when its actually time for us to be together, it will bring us to each other once again” like i actually told myself that, in those words. and yknow what? i wasnt even wrong. on july 15th she texted me from an empty tumblr with her old url and at first i literally couldnt believe it but we talked for hours and hours and i asked her what happened bc i thought she was disconnecting for the summer and she said “i was. i am. i just couldnt not talk to you anymore” and she said that she thought about me every single day, and i told her i missed her and she said she didnt text sooner bc she thought i’d be angry at her and ofc i wouldnt, i could never be angry at her and besides, she was just taking care of herself and i said i dont think i could be anything less than head over heels for for, and she said she felt the same way, but wasnt ready to be more than friends yet. but that had always been more than enough for me. just having her in my life would always be more than enough for me. so we stayed friends.
then, on august 9th i got this ask.
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and she saw it after i said i was gonna go to bed (bc again, i had school the next day) and she texted me a whole thing about how that was the nicest thing anyone had ever said about her and that i should be asleep but she had to get it out of her chest and that her anxiety made it hard for her to show how much i meant to her so she was sorry if i didnt know and this would probably make no sense but she was tired of keeping it to herself bc shes the luckiest person alive for having met me and that it was gonna be so hard because shes so difficult (shes not) and her anxiety is difficult but that she literally spent every night thinking about me and of buying plane tickets to come see me so that she could be with me. then she was like “im sorry if this is uncomfortable to you and you can just ignore it but i think im in love with you and this is over text and not romantic at all (it was the most romantic night of my life) but you’re asleep (i wasnt) and we arent together but i want to be one day” and until this i was Trying to fall asleep and then i checked my phone that kept RINGING and died a thousand times over and started to answer and she sent other texts saying “i’ve never felt this way about anyone before i’m so in love with you its fucking ridiculous and this is gonna be so complicated but fuck i want this so bad / i’m sorry it took me so long / would you move to new york with me?” and i was This Close to literally fucking exploding like. how the hell was this happening how was it not a DREAM. so we talked and i obviously said i loved her too and eventually she asked me out and thats still probably the best night of my life. other highlights: “i’ve loved you way before august 9th so jot that down” and “off topic but i love you / you’re honestly my other half” and, after i said “you cant make me laugh its 2am”, she answered “i’m going to make you laugh for the rest of your life so help me god” and thats my favorite thing anyone has ever said to me probably and so far she’s kept her word.
anyways we got back together and then she told me that she never even told her friends she broke up with me??? bc that way she could keep pretending we were still together???? literally like sjdksndk imagine being this loved. i dont have to. anyways she wrote poems abt me sometimes and her christmas gift for me was gonna be a book with all her poems and she called it “what we owe to each other” because of the good place (remember how i said it’d be relevant later? its later) bc like she said that when we were watching tgp together on rabb.it thats when she realized that she Really Truly liked me like For Real. and the inscription on the book was going to be “to the girl i love / and what i owe her” and. yall. i cry. anyways one of the poems had a huge impact on us. heres the story:
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and she got them but we broke up before she got to mail them to me. what happened was she had some mental health problems and she said she couldnt give me what i needed at the time but knew i’d still give her my all bc thats just how i am and she thought it wouldnt be fair so she broke things off to work on her mental health. she said she would need some time before we could be friends. the last thing we said was that we loved each other. this was in like november 2018, and we didnt talk for months. i actually tried to move on this time after a while, but it didnt take. and then i gave up for good. havent tried since. but anyways, then, on march 11th, 2019, i had my first day of college back in my home country, and we have this “pranks”/games that seniors get to do to the freshmen, and one of them required eggs, and they asked us to paint them, so i panted mine as iron man bc it was easy, but c LOVES iron man. like. LOVES. like in a Whole New Level of loving. once when we were dating she said she loved me more than tony stark and i was like. shook. like she tattooed “T.S” on her ankle after him. u get the point. she loves him very much, its adorable and endearing and i love it. anyways. so i sent her a picture of it saying like “you dont have to answer this but i made this for my university and i thought you would like it” and she answered and IMMEDIATELY something clicked and we talked and talked and talked and it was never weird or awkward or uncomfortable. it never is with her. its incredible, i cant explain it. i Know shes my soulmate like thats the ONLY possible explanation for this kind of connection. its unreal. anyways. we became friends again! all was well.
then one beautiful night she drunk texts me sndjkajs she sends me so many texts and says it sucks that we live so far away and that she saw my posts (in this particular case, one that said something about like. when she talked about love now, was it about someone else?) and she said that it wasnt. and then she went to sleep and i only saw the texts when i woke up and i was DYING bc we had a 4 hour difference and it’d take a while for her to wake up. when she did, we talked and she said she wasnt over me and was scared she might never be, and even though we were still gonna stay friends, it was nice to know that she still loved me. ok so fast forward a bit more and i was starting to wonder if she’d moved on again, when she finds out her best friend had a crush on her, and that conversation ends up with her saying “it was 100% platonic for me / sorry if thats weird i just wanted you to know that” and it was NOT weird it was GREAT NEWS bc i was Hella jealous of her best friend and at first i wondered if they were dating and anyways the fact that she wanted me to know that was a pretty good hint that she still had feelings for me. ngl im still somewhat jealous of h (c’s best friend), but thats just bc im an insecure lil bitch and also bc they get to go out and do stuff together that i cant do with c bc of the distance, yknow? but anyways. then she went on a graduation trip in mid to the end of june and she bought me a magnet. just. out of nowhere. i cannot stress enough how Incredibly unexpected this was. so much so that i actually convinced myself that it meant she was over me????? literally. what the fuck. anyways we named him together and coincidentally (or bc of soulmate powers. who knows) we both had the same favorite names. i still love that.
okay so then we go to july 29th, 2019. first of all theres one of my favorite interactions Ever which was like after i was venting about something and i was thanking her and i said “you’re always here for me” to which she answered “nowhere else i’d rather be” and i still think thats peak romance and i will take no criticism on this. anyways so then she sent me a poem that she wrote based on a song i’d sent her (the song i called “heaven is a place” and its the BIGGEST mood for being in love and i sent it to her bc it was how i felt about her so her writing a poem about it?? literally the best thing ever. love it) anyways it was a beautiful poem and i cried and got very emotional and kinda went too far in my compliments (aka being very obvious about my romantic feelings) and then i was like oh no sorry if i made u uncomfortable and she was like. “you have NEVER. EVER EVER EVER EVER made me uncomfortable” “you’re the only person on planet earth i am comfortably myself around” and “there’s nothing you could ever say that i wouldn’t wanna hear” and anyways it was just very good and romantic conversation even tho we were just cough cough platonic hashtag gal pals hashtag no homo ✌️ and then she was like ok wait. i need to talk to u abt something. and in short she said she was waiting for us and i was like well what are you waiting for exactly? and she was like idk?? for us to accidentally bump into each other in new york in a few years?? WHICH WAS LITERALLY WHAT I’D DAYDREAM ABOUT BACK IN JUNE 2018 BEFORE SHE CAME BACK OKAY so anyways we had a Great conversation and said i love you about a thousand times each and she decided she was gonna buy tickets to come see me. and then she dID like TWO DAYS LATER. lichrally. queen of impulsivity but in the best way possible.
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ok quick edit here cuz i forgot to say that when i found out she was coming i asked for my mom’s help to make a necklace pendant for her from scratch. my mom works with prosthetics so she has the material to make jewelry and back when c and i were dating in 2018 i had made this lil design for a necklace that had the moon and the ocean (bc duh) and i was gonna give it to her for valentines day in 2019 but we broke up before that so i didnt get the chance, but when i found out i was meeting her i knew i had to. so i made the necklace in wax, like this:
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and my mom took it to her work and heated it up to melt it and keep the shape of it to fill with silver, and this was the result:
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i gave it to her when she got here and she wore it while she was here and it made me so happy. ok edit over
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ok so we kept being like couple-y but not officially in a relationship bc we didnt want to make her anxiety worse. also at one point she was like “so about the ‘i love you more than the moon/ocean’ thing, since we BOTH love BOTH of the moon AND the ocean, i think its only Fair if we update our love declarations to ‘i love you more than the mocean’ bc its mix of both but thats not a word, buT its pronounced exactly like ‘motion’. therefore we should both start saying ‘i love you more than the motion’”. so now we have both the wonderful, romantic, original version, and the NOT ROMANTIC AT ALL DO U HEAR ME C??? version :) and after this day she always started with the WORST!!!!!! version, and i always started with the Only Valid Version, but we’d still answer each other’s ofc because. well. thats love i gues?? it sorta goes like this though: her: i love you more than the motion / me: i hate u / me: i literally hate u so much / me: i Also love you more than the motion
but anyways she was coming to visit me but the plane ticket wasnt for my home country it was for where i was going to university at (a new university, i was starting over) and when i first got here on this campus, i didnt have a working phone number for this country, and i wouldnt be able to access the wifi for 3 days, so i had no way of talking to her. it was TERRIBLE and i missed her more than anything in my LIFE but when i got wifi (after CRYING to the people here bc theyre the most unorganized uni ever and i was already very overwhelmed and stressed) i immediately called her and she’d sent me over 100 text messages dkfjssjks it was amazing, there were two (2) videos of her singing (which is like. objectively the best thing in the world, and the song was rlly romantic and i love it sm when she showed it to me for the first time she said it made her think abt me), a poem, AND a HUGE text with “i love you” written like. a THOUSAND TIMES. seriously i have a gif of it opening and scrolling bc it was so long that the text wouldnt show up directly on the chat screen and u have to click on it to see the rest. i’d never felt more loved in my entire life by anyone ever. anyways so then it came the day for her to get here and i had to wake up at 5 am to go get her at the airport and the uber was like $40 but who CARES it was the best day of my LIFE and i got there 20 minutes earlier bUT GUESS WHAT SO DID SHE (hashtag just soulmate things) then we facetimed the entire time while she was walking through the airport and getting her luggage and then she hung up to walk to the door where i was and we hugged for like 5 minutes and we were totally in people’s way and also almost fell but it was the best thing in the world and i never should’ve let her go. but, we had to go home, so i did. and we spent 4 days together and im not gonna go into details bc this is already too long but u can always send me another ask about her visit if ur not a coward. also i bought her a hoodie from my uni and whenever she wears it i just. die. in short, those days were the happiest i’ve ever been. this campus res had never felt like home before that friday and it hasnt again since that monday, but i swear to god, during those 4 days, this was the only place i could possibly belong.
anyways then she left and i cried for the entire uber ride home and then i cried all day. lmao. also when she was here she gave me the poetry book, the magnet, and the bracelet. still wear the bracelet every single day and i love it more than anything. but then personal stuff happened and we kinda stopped being couple-y again and we’re just friends now but before new years i asked her if she still loved me and she said yes and she said she’d tell me if it changed so ✌️✌️ im assuming it hasnt. even tho my brain is a bitch and everyday its like. today. today is the day. this is when its gonna happen. buT yknow we’ve spent months before without even talking to each other and we got through that still in love, so i mostly ignore it. and tbh i know that actually like, even if we grow apart now (god forbid, but still) we’ll find our way back to each other eventually. like, i’ve said this before and i’ll say it again: nothing, not even the universe itself, can convince me that shes not my soulmate. and even if it turns out i’m not hers, loving her is still the greatest honor i can think of.
another edit: also i started drawing recently and the first person i’ve ever finished drawing was her and also (surprise surprise @c since you’re already seeing all my feelings anyway) bc of my second drawing i almost missed the deadline for one of my midterms (which was a take-home test) bc instead of writing it i spent the entire day before the deadline finishing the drawing which was a secret valentines day gift (secret as in she didnt know it was supposed to be a gift, she thought it was just a drawing inspired by a quote that she loves) and i finished at 2 am but shes 3 hours behind so for her it was still 11 pm which MEANS it was still valentines day so it still counts, i win, lesbian rights!
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melonkooky · 6 years
Text
meant to be [min yoongi]
requested
word count: 2601
genre: soulmate!au, fluff, angst if you squint
author’s note: IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG!!!! also, this might not necessarily be a soulmate!au, i just kinda let my imagination wander. (i also changed the prompt just a tad bit 😬😬). i did not proofread this so ignore all my mistakes please
please do not copy my work. but please like and reblog it. thank you!!!!
masterlist
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your legs felt heavy. it didn’t help that your feet felt like thick wooden blocks every time you moved your leg. you were worn out, your energy completely drained. you had been running around the entire day, being the official assistant for not just one, not two, but three different people. you took the job because it allowed you to be around very important people of the business. it also was a high paying job. that being said, most days were generally okay and you wouldn’t run too many errands. however, today happened to be a very important day at the company. your bosses, the three men, were giving a huge presentation about a big step in their business. because of all the preparations that had to be made in so little time, you had to take up a lot of the tasks, causing you to run around constantly. and then it was only polite of you to stay for the presentation itself...even if your legs and body were throbbing and it was already dark outside.
so, here you were now. you and a few other people were getting onto a bus. but someone was very rude and pushed you out of the way. you would have just tipped over just from how little energy you had but luckily, your arm was close to the side of the bus. you were able to catch yourself. with a heavy glare on the back of their head, you followed behind. the bus was close to being full, at least all the seats were taken. you were close to just walking out to take another--empty--bus. “hey.” you suddenly heard.
you didn’t think they were talking to you as most days you were rather invisible, but your gut told you to look. so you did. you found a young man sitting in a seat looking up at you. he was wearing a beanie, hoodie, and sweats, a face cover hung tightly behind his chin. he was slightly paler than everyone else you noticed. when you made eye contact with him, he looked to his left. you followed and saw that this young man, who seemed no older than twenty, remove the bag he had next to him, revealing an empty seat underneath. “you can sit if you want.” he offered.
you normally would have politely declined however the screaming pain in your feet practically told you to sit your ass down. you smiled and bowed in respect and politeness, “thank you so much.” you took the seat next to him.
the bus didn’t move for a few minutes. this irritated you because you wanted to waste no time getting home. but eventually, the vehicles inched forward with a long groan before driving down the street. the ride was bumpy and in its own way, awakening. you sighed exhaustively. “so, where are you heading?” the guy next to you asked.
you turned to him, not expecting more conversation with this man. you shrugged, “home.”
he nodded. “me too.”
you nodded, feeling a bit awkward. there really wasn’t anything to talk about. you felt a weird tingly feeling in your stomach, however. curiously, you turned your head to look at the guy next to you. he’s gently gnawing on his bottom lip as he stares into space in front of him. unconsciously, you began to stare, as if his cheek or jawline or beanie was just so intriguing. suddenly, he turns, meeting your eyes. you gasp and hurry to look away. your cheeks slowly emit warmth as they turn pink. now you were biting your own lip. “i’m min yoongi.” he suddenly spoke.
you scared to turn. why were you suddenly acting this way? so anxious and nervous, acting so awkward around this particular guy, you were not yourself. after a few seconds, you met his eyes again. “l/n y/n.”
yoongi flashed you a smile, it was gummy. despite only having just met this guy, you felt yourself being drawn to him. you didn’t know how to describe how you felt exactly but it was similar to some kind of force, a force that was pulling you towards him. yoongi remained still as he looked at you. but he quickly turned away. he pulled his face mask up to cover the bottom half of his face. he also wanted to hide his growing blush in his cheeks. he was feeling so off suddenly. he knew he wasn’t sick or getting sick. it felt very new and very different. some feeling was causing him to act differently, some feeling was drawing him towards you. 
you and yoongi didn’t exchange anymore words after that. fortunately, you stop came first. you stood up from you seat. “bye, min yoongi.” you said before turning and exiting the bus. 
once outside, you released a heavy breath. you waited for the bus to depart from the curb before turning around and walking down the street in the direction of your apartment. your apartment complex was a little on the expensive side, much grander than your average apartment. you loved it to death because you never imagined yourself getting such a good job and being able to afford such an apartment. 
you typed in the code to your keypad and it clicked, a small beep sounding after. you opened the door and stepped inside. the door closed with a soft thud and the sound of the door locking itself behind you echoed. you took of your shoes immediately, that was first of your to-do list. you walked into your apartment and set down your work bag on the counter top of the kitchen. you opened your fridge and took out some leftovers that you made previously (no way in hell you were cooking so late at night). you stuck that into your microwave and afterwards, rushed to eat it. after you hurried into your bedroom where you showered and got ready for bed. and last on your to-do list, you got into bed and closed your eyes for the night.
-
and so the day ends again. fortunately for you it didn’t end so late, unlike the previous night. work had resumed as normal and everyone was in a good mood from the giant step forward of the business. you were happy as well, but you didn’t care that much about the business. you were more for keeping yourself alive. 
you waited for the bus again. it was the earlier arrival so you just knew it was going to be crowded. you sighed as you crossed your legs, tugging your jacket over your shoulders more. it sure was getting colder outside. you pulled out your phone seconds before you heard your name in the form of a question. immediately you were puzzled. you looked up to see the young man offered you a seat on the bus. “oh, yoongi, right?”
he nodded. 
you smiled in return was tucking away your phone. “what are you doing here?”
he shrugged and sat down next to you. you turned to him, still expecting an explanation. “just taking the bus home.” he replied.
you narrowed your eyes. “if i understand correctly, you were already on the bus yesterday when i got on from this very stop. it was also very close to midnight.”
yoongi broke eye contact and leaned against the wall behind him. he crossed his legs just as you had and sighed. “why does it matter to you?”
you glared at him before leaning against the wall yourself. there wasn’t anyone else at this stop, just you and yoongi. the silence was much more comfortable than yesterday’s, between you and yoongi. it felt more normal, as if you and him had known each other for a while. you turned your head and looked at him, “where’d you come from? work?” you asked.
he nodded and held his bag closer. it was small and square, seeming thing as well. you eyed his bag as he answered your question, “i’m a composer.” 
you didn’t know what it was, but something inside you clicked. suddenly you were just so fascinated by him. you had the urge to bombard him with questions but you bit your tongue. you pointed at his bag. “what’s that?”
he looked at you finally. “it’s just a laptop.”
you nodded. “oh.”
he laughed at you. as he laughed, you felt your heart beat faster. you felt the warmth in your cheeks. yoongi stopped laughing moments later. you looked at him, “what was so funny?”
he met your eyes, his smile causing your insides to be enveloped in warmth. “so, where did you come from?”
“oh, work. i’m an assistant for three different bosses.” you sighed as you spoke. “they all basically do the same job but, i have to do a lot of errands for them all.” they had been driving you crazy recently. it seemed as if they were only working you more while they hardly did a thing.
yoongi leaned forward to get a better look at your face. “that explains why you looked so tired last night.”
“well, it’s a very good paying job.”
“but you don’t like it.” yoongi observed.
you looked at him. you were about to protest that you did like your job but hearing his words made you question whether you actually did. you sighed heavily after putting a lot of thought into your job. “no, i guess i don’t.”
yoongi turned away. he felt bad for you suddenly. “do you want to eat somewhere?”
you looked at him. “i mean, we can. i haven’t eaten dinner yet.”
“let’s go.” 
yoongi stood up, his laptop bag in his hand. you stood up as well, grabbing your bag and putting the strap on your shoulder. you looked at yoongi, “where do you want to go?”
-
yoongi led you to a casual restaurant. the aroma of food filled your nose and made your mouth water. you were starving as a matter of fact. you were excited to eat. yoongi laughed at your expression, feeling his own heart beat quicken its pace. he felt a connection to you, he wasn’t going to deny that. but he wasn’t sure why.
a waitress led you and yoongi through the restaurant. she picked a booth for you and yoongi before setting down two menus. you and yoongi sat across from each other. “ah, there’s so many choices.” you mumbled.
yoongi looked at you, “you’ve never been here?”
you nodded. “i don’t have a lot of time.”
“let’s just order a bunch of things and try them all then.” he suggested.
“that’s a lot of money though.”
he shrugged. “you claimed you had a good-paying job, and that you work for three people. that tells me you have some money.”
your eyes widened. “min yoongi!”
he grinned. “i’m just messing with you. let’s just order and then we’ll figure it out later.”
so you and yoongi ordered a ton of dishes. he was excited to eat with you while you were excited to try them all. of course, you were happy to be dining with a stranger you just met yesterday. overall, it felt natural. as if you and yoongi had been friends for a long time.
you and yoongi talked a lot, joking with each other. it felt like you and him haven’t seen each other in a while and were catching up. you learned a ton of things about him and he learned a ton of things about you. a connection was made.
after everything on the table was either sampled or gone, you sat back. you had a thought, a thought that caused your cheeks to flare up. you were falling in love with someone you had just met, and honestly you weren’t sure what to do with such feelings. you met his eyes, finding the moment suddenly very intimate. 
“yoongi, can i be honest with you?” you suddenly asked.
yoongi looked at you, nodding. you sighed. “i don’t know if you felt this too but when i began talking to you, it felt like something physical, perhaps, or just something was there that was drawing me towards you.” he didn’t say anything and this was a sign for you to continue. “like, the first conversation we had on the bus, i immediately felt something with you.” oh my god, you were confessing. “like, a connection perhaps. i’m sorry. we just met and this all sounds so crazy. but i just felt something and i needed to talk about it. i just don’t understand anything.” and now you were rambling about nonsense.
you looked at yoongi’s face and stopped mid-sentence, “i’m rambling, aren’t i?”
yoongi looked at you, remained silent. his expression show no signs of emotions. if anything, he looked a little disappointed. you couldn’t tell what he was feeling to be exact and it was irritating you. was he confused, happy, surprised that you basically had just confessed your love? it was only your second day with him and you were admitting you were in love. you sighed and grabbed your wallet. you pulled out some cash and threw it onto the table, not knowing how much it was. you just wanted to escape the situation. you hurriedly grabbed your stuff and slid out of the booth. “i’m sorry.” you told him before heading out of the restaurant.
you walked at a quick pace, just wanting to get home and cry. you knew it was a bold move. you knew it. you took the risk and now you were regretting it. you really, really liked him. your feelings were strong. and now you were never going to see him again.
suddenly a hand wrapped around your wrist, causing you to twirl around. you didn’t have time to see who it is but you had a guess. yoongi had ran to you, spun you around, and now had planted his lips onto yours. you gasped at the sudden move. you weren’t quite sure about what was going on. but you found yourself melting into the kiss. your arms snaked around his neck while his hands gently held your waist. his lips felt so perfect against yours, as if it was meant to be. his warmth ignited your lust for him. everything about you and yoongi just fit so perfectly together. 
eventually, you found yourself making out with yoongi in the middle of the sidewalk just outside the restaurant. you pulled away with a heavy blush on your cheeks. you were panting slightly. while standing against his chest, your gaze stayed on his chin. “yoongi-”
“i’m sorry for giving you the thought that i was rejecting you.” he began. “really, i was just surprised because i was feeling the exact same things you were...as if...as if we were soulmates.” his voice slowly dropped into a whisper as he spoke.
“s-soulmates?” you had to pull away slightly to meet his eyes. “do you really believe that?”
“i mean, it explains all the things we’ve been feeling. like a force pulling us together, like a physical connection in the air was made between us. not to mention that you just confessed your love for me after we only met last night.”
you smiled suddenly. “i like that. soulmates.”
yoongi was blushing as well, but he was more embarrassed by the fact that he just made out with his soulmate in the middle of the sidewalk. he was never really into pda, so he knew that he must really be in love with you in order for him to do such a thing.
yoongi smiled at you before grabbing your hand. “let’s catch a bus. if you don’t mind, we’re going to your place. it’s cold.” 
you grinned and cherished the feeling of his hand in yours. everything happened fast, perhaps faster than most love stories, but it was something that was going to last a lifetime.
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keigoaizawaslut · 6 years
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Head over Heels (2)
Im sorry if it sucks😭
Chapter(2)
Loki x reader/avenger
Summary: When thor comes back from asguard bringing loki with him to the Stark tower you almost instantly develop a crush on the young prince although the other Avengers really dont approve and are kinda determined to keep you two apart.
It had been about a month since Loki started staying with you guys. Everyone was slowly but surely getting more used to him being around. They even talked to him a little which made you happy because you wanted him to finally feel like he belonged after being push aside for so long. Though a few of the Avengers still had a few hard feelings towards him and Tony still acted like a worrisome father whenever you two were near each other you felt he would fit in perfectly with the odd group.
It was still pretty ealier in the afternoon just turing twelve o'clock. Steve,Bucky, and Natasha took a mission and Tony and Bruce busying themselves in the lab. Taking a chance to enjoy this quietness knowing it wouldn't last forever you decided to curl up with your favorite book in your room by the window enjoying the beautiful view outside. As you read your book you mind wondered a bit to where Loki was. You hadnt seen him all day you knew he started training about two weeks ago with Thor and Bucky so he might tired still you kinda missed him. You and Loki had been flirting a lot as of lately though for you two it was more like a game then flirting. You guys had became really close in the short time you knew each other and you didnt know what it was but something about the god just made you have butterflies in you stomach. As you continued to go deeper into your thoughts they were interrupted by a loud thud followed by Thor.
"HOW COULD YOU LOKI" Thor screams sounding like he's on the verge of tears. You hop up almost nervous to see what Loki could of done that was so bad. As you make your way out of your room and follow the noise you struggle to surpress a laugh as you place your eyes on the sight before you. "HOW COULD YOU DO THIS TO YOUR OWN BROTHER" Thor says as he dramatically  throws the empty Poptart box across the room. "Brother you told me I could help myself so I did" Loki says as he pops the remaining piece of poptart into his mouth with a smug grin. "I didn't say eat the whole damn box Loki." Thor says sulking in defeat. It was honestly a site to see never would you have thought the God of Thunder himself would get so worked up over poptarts. "Stop being a mewling quim brother" Loki says as he chuckles a bit at his brothers despire. Not being able to hold back your laughter anymore you burst into a fit of giggles. Both gods turned as the notice your presence.
"We can get you some more poptarts Thor its okay" you trying to comfort the god still giggling a bit. "No worries Y/N im going out to get a bunch now and im going to put them somewhere no one can find them" he says as he glares at Loki who still has a smug grin on his handsome face. As he leaves and slams the door you turn to face Loki and find him a few feet behind you.
"Where have you being all day you poptart burglar" you say jokingly and you watch him chuckle a bit. The small jesture made your heart flip you liked seeing him smile and laugh. "Thor and I just got back from the training yard not to long ago and if you must know I do not regret anything I did" He says smirking as his eyes travel down your body. Though instead of making you uncomfortable the look gave a little shiver of pleasure going right to your core. "What are you wearing dear" he says his deep voice a bit hoarse.
Looking down realizing you were still in your pajamas which consist of some short shorts and tank top you quickly became slightly embarrassed forgetting about your appearance when you rushed out of your room." Well I thought I was here alone and decided to take a lazy day" you say with a small blush on your cheeks playing with your fingers a bit realizing his gaze was still travling down your body taking in all your curves. Though a little embarrassed his gaze on you made you confident and actually a little turned on. Your eyes started to rake down his body still clothes in work out gear. Black jogging pants and a tight dark green t-shirt that clung to his well defined muscles like a second skin his hair up in a manbun to keep it from his face made his blue-green eyes even more noticeable along with his sharp cheekbones and jawline. Unknowingly biting your lips staring at the masterpiece. Loki clears his throat regaining his composer and noticing you staring. " Notice something you like darling" he ask smirking a bit causing you to snap out of your little fanasty. "I could ask you the same thing. Besides you were staring first" you smugly returning the grin and you watch his fall realzing he had been caught you noticed a small blush upon his cheeks.
He makes his way over to you and stops right infront of you easliy towering over you. The close proximity caused a familiar heat to start forming in between your thighs and you two stared into each others eyes. "There's something about you my dear that I just cant seem to draw myself alway from. You intrigue me deeply." He says lips right next to your ear his warm breath doing nothing to help your "problem". "I find you quite interesting too Loki. If i must be honest with myself I must say that oftening times find myself looking foward to seeing you everyday even though you're an ass who takes people's poptarts" you say with a smirk as your lips are now brushing against each other's. You felt as though the need of his lips upon yours was unbearable. He could be such a tease at times and you were tired of the games. Grabbing him by the neck pulling him closer as your lips connected you almost moaned in the sheer pleasure of his lips being against your own. The feeling was extraordinary. He nipped at your bottom lip a bit as his tongue moved acrossed it begging for entre and you so happliy obliged. Your tongues battled for dominance as his strong hands found your hips and placed you on the counter as he moved between your legs continuing the passionate kiss. Tangling your fingers in his soft black locks undoing the manbun you thought this moment couldn't get any better....well you were right it couldn't because someone had to ruin it.
"What the fuck are you doing to Y/N Rock of Ages" Tony yells making you two jump a bit knowing you had been caught. Loki glared at Tony not only for the annoying nick name but also for interrupting such a percious moment between the two of you. "He didnt do anything Tony jeez dont be a buzzkill" you say pushing Loki back a bit to hop off the counter.
"A BUZZKILL!!!... you guys were just literally having mouth sex in my kitchen...ON THE COUNTER". He says freaking out. Grabbing Loki's hand you drag him back to your room laughing at what just happened leaving Tony to freak out on his own. You didn't really know what this was between you and Loki just yet but you couldn't wait to see what kinds of things the universe had in store for you two.
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~hey guys i'm sorry for the wait guys I had a few perosnal and family things I had to deal with plus a bit of writers block. Anyways I hope you guys like it sorry if it sucks ass 😭😂. Though if you liked it please feel free to reblog and comment. I love to hear your opinions. And if you want to be tagged please just ask luvs I will glady do it😘💕.~
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~Taglist~
@wrappedinlokisarms
@hiddlestoner3059
@godofthepans
@onlystylesangels
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bring-me-bellarke · 6 years
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The 100 Ask
Tagged by @griffinnblake ! Thanks, Lindsay! Honestly, what a blast this was.
rules: answer as many as you want if tagged and then tag three more people OR just reblog it and treat it as a regular ask meme!! have fun xoxo
1. What would you get arrested for on the Ark?  Probably for punching a guard or something, tbh. Maybe starting underground resistance (yikes)
2. Would you take off your wristband when you landed on the ground?  Maybe. 
3. What would the necklace Finn would make for you look like? (Clarke: deer/Raven: a raven duh..)  Probably a fist or some sort of cool resist sign. 
4. If you could resurrect any MINOR character who would it be?  WELLS JAHA DESERVED BETTER. (close second would be Anya) (close third would be Ilian)
5. Create a squad of 5 characters to go on missions with. Who are they? Bellamy, Clarke, Raven, Monty, Miller.
6. Minty or Briller?  Mintyyyyyy all da way. Briller just never did anything for me. 
7. What would your name be in Trigedasleng? (example: Octavia=Okteivia…just make it up!)  Jessei, Jessai, i have no idea. 
8. Thoughts on Finn? I’ll be honest, I was blind when I first started watching and thought Finn was a good guy...until Raven showed up and was like WTF ....and then he massacred a bunch of people. Then I looked back and realized how manipulative he was with Clarke, and what a shitty person he was in general.
9. Be honest. How willing would you have been to take the chip without knowing all the horrible things it does? I don’t think I would have. It wouldn’t really appeal to me. I could see myself giving in if someone I loved was threatened (like Clarke with Abby, I would’ve folded like a lawn chair)  
10. What character do you relate to most & What character do you like the least not including the obvious ones like Pike, etc… I relate to Clarke and Raven the most. I’m bossy and serious like Clarke, but also sassy and passionate like Raven. The character I like the least was (don’t bring out the pitchforks) L/xa. To me, from day 1, she was too bland of a character. It’s like she was always putting on this brave facade that I just never bought into. But I truly love ADC and she’s awesome. I just didn’t believe all of L/xa’s dumb philosophies and thought she wasn’t a good leader. Also, Octavia was on my most hated from the moment she laid her hands on her brother (i will never be over that. bitter 2kforever)
11. Describe your delinquent outfit. (Would you wear something like Murphy’s jacket with the spikey red shoulder patch or have a trademark like Jasper’s goggles? Be creative, yet practical)  I probably would have had a patchy black leather jacket, gray t shirt that read Space Sucks, combat boots, black ripped up jeans, and the jacket would’ve had RESIST stitched onto the back in big letters (or maybe a patch). I like to think I would’ve been a total badass but who knows. 
12. Favorite type of mutant animal?  I don’t think we saw many besides two-headed deer, pauna, and maybe some panthers? Oh, wait! Glowing butterflies, those were cool.   
13. What would your job be on the Ark? Oooooh, I don’t know. Sounds weird, but I would’ve liked to work in the archives/library, making sure all the history was preserved (sounds like a Bellamy thing, I know). But tbh, I probably would be jailed for starting a resistance as a side gig. 
14. Would you have willingly pumped Ontari’s heart if Abby asked?  I’m squeamish, but I would’ve done it to save Clarke (and everyone else in turn). 
15. If Lexa wasn’t Heda, then who would make the best commander?  Hmm, good question. Well I loved Anya and think she could’ve. I think Luna might’ve if she’d given up her weird ways and NOT BEEN TOTALLY RUINED in s4. ALSO LINCOLN (RIP IM NOT OVER IT). If all 3 could’ve led as like a council, that’d be fire. 
16. If you were a grounder, then where would you live and who would be your mentor? Oh god, I don’t know the tribes. Maybe Trishanakru (sp?) just cause Ilian’s such a hottie and it would’ve been cool to be friends. 
17. How would you act if you ate the hallucinogenic nuts like Jasper and Monty?  I’d probably dare everyone to go jump off a waterfall with me (but like a small one)
18. How would you have dealt with Charlotte’s crime? A more John Murphy approach or Bellamy Blake?  Uggggghhhh, this is hard. Listen, neither method worked. Charlotte wouldn’t have survived on her own and Murphy’s dumb. Maybe like a jail or something they could’ve kept her in? Idk, there’s too many things that went wrong with all that. 
19. Who should be the Chancellor, if anyone?  Anyone at all? Crap, I don’t think there should just be one, it’s too much power. I like the idea of council/committee with the mains like Bellamy, Clarke, Kane, Abby, uhh idk who else. 
20. Mount Weather had a lot of modern commodities. (example: Maya’s Ipod) What is the one thing you would snatch while there?  Headphones to escape all the drama, probably. Maybe some good hiking gear because goddammit how do they all travel through all these jungles/woods? 
21. Do you think you’d have caught the virus spread through camp or would you have been immune like Octavia?  I would’ve caught it probs. 
22. What would your grounder tattoos look like? Hairstyle? War paint? I’d have just cool geo shape tattoos probably. I’d wear a high pony because how do the girls deal with humidity/sweat wearing it down???? My hair is hella thick, so no thanks. War paint would probably just be a few lines on my cheeks, maybe diagonals. 
23. Favorite quote?  I CAN’T JUST CHOOSE ONE. OH GOD MY HEART LITERALLY HURTS AT ALL THE ONES I LOVE. (this deserves its own post tbh)
24. Can you forgive Murphy for his actions? How about Bellamy?  Murphy’s a real pain in my side. Full offense, I hate that we move on so easily from a white boy’s VERY SIGNIFICANT MISTAKES, yet poor POC Bellamy has to keep suffering from the repercussions. Like Murphy LITERALLY permanently damaged Raven’s body yet they’re cool now? Idk, I hold grudges, and I don’t think I’d be able to let it go. Kudos to Raven, ig. Though I won’t hesitate to admit that Bellamy has royally fucked up too, from the radio to the army (which happened in a season I hate altogether). It just seems like we forgive Murphy much easier than Bellamy and it kills me. Whooo, sorry for that. 
25. If one of the characters was in the Hunger Games, who would have the best shot at winning? Hmm, I was gonna say Bellamy but he’s a real softie. Clarke is sneaky and sometimes heartless, so maybe her. BUT ACTUALLY Octavia would because she’s absolutely bat-shit crazy.
26. Least favorite ship? Favorite ship? NOT INCLUDING CLEXA OR BELLARKE  Aww crap. I didn’t like Flarke. Fave ship (that never happened) was Ice Mechanic, like imagine the chemistry/hotness. Ugh, still upset about this. Fave canon would be Kabby, I guess? They’re great, but it’s weird to think Kane had Abby tortured. Idk (Y’all know I’m ride or die Bellarke). I was conflicted for a long time about Linctavia because I loved them but when you boil it down, he was way older than her and it seemed kinda Stockholm Syndrome-y? Plus, she turns psycho and he would’ve hated it. IDK ALL SHIPS ARE PROBLEMATIC DAMMIT.
27. A song that should be included in the next season, like when Radioactive was? If there had to be another guest star like Shawn Mendes on the show, who would you want to make a cameo?  Lindsay said Home II by Dotan and I 100% agree because that song is amazing and would work so well for S5. Oooh, cameos! Um CAN YOU IMAGINE IF STEPHEN KING JUST SHOWED UP OUT OF THE BLUE? Like I would die. Or Kass Morgan, the original creator! 
28. What would you do if you were stuck in the bunker with Murphy for all that time?  Honestly, I’d probably be very annoyed and want to be far away from him. BUT if we did warm up to each other, I think we’d bond over cooking (if there was any food). 
29.Opinion on Emori? Roan?  Both badasses. Kinda indifferent on them actually. Like I don’t love or hate them. 
30. Would you want to be an extra that is killed off in a brutal way?  Yeah, sure. It’d be cool if it was memorable, poignant, and really related to/impacted the storyline. High hopes, amirite? 
31. A character you’d like to learn more about and get flashbacks of? Raven, I think. All her flashbacks were related to Finn and I hated it. WHO WAS SHE BESIDES FINN’S GIRLFRIEND? Show us her mess of a mom, how her love for science started, how she became a mechanic! God, there’s so much we don’t know. 
32. A character you’d bang?  BELLAMY FUCKING BLAKE, ladies and gents.
If you made it through all this, bless your soul! BUT THIS WAS SO MUCH FUN!! I loved having to really think about the hypotheticals and what I’d do if I was in this world/show. Side note, I’ve been totally gone from this blog and not even tagging my stuff (which is where I freak out the most). I’m slowly coming back and hope April comes soon! All right, this has been long enough. I tag @littlebellarkemix & @southsideserpentine & honestly anyone who wants to (it’s a lot of fun). 
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the7thshepard · 4 years
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Life update and some introspection. It is long, and it is super personal. You’ve been warned.
(Sorry to my mobile user followers, you might get lambasted with a long post anyway)
If you’re curious enough to snoop through here, sweet. It means that amidst all of my followers who like and reblog the stuff I like and reblog, you probably give a damn? Or you’re just nosy. Either way, thanks for coming. You’ll need to pull up a chair, I’d imagine. It’s gonna get long.
As of right now, I’m spending Thanksgiving day alone. I’m writing this from the dining table of my apartment in California as it rains outside. I’ve received several invites to do things with friends, but so far have accepted none of them. Part of me knows that I will be sad today because of that, but the other part of me just doesn’t have the energy or wherewithal to deal with other people today. Yet, I’m leaving myself open for any opportunity, should it present itself.
This decade has been kind of a wild ride for me. I’ve spent almost all of it in school. I began high school, graduated high school, started college, switched majors around twice, fell in love, came out, got my heart broken, graduated college, worked for seven months, then started graduate school in August. How did a Kansas boy like me end up all the way in California? It’s actually quite the story.
I had decided my second senior year of my undergrad, way back in Spring 2018, that I was just going to finish with a performance degree and just go home and work for the rest of my life. Whatever job I could find, as long as I could keep it and it could bring me stable income, I was going to go home and give up playing the horn. I been so burnt out on school and everything that had happened around me over the course of my undergrad that I had decided it just wasn’t worth it to continue pursuing. I had wrestled with this idea for the longest time and eventually settled on everyone thinking I’m a coward for getting a degree and just disappearing off of the face of the earth. It was the easiest solution.
But something quite unusual and rather miraculous happened.
October 2018, my undergrad horn teacher, one other horn player from my studio, and I all went to Wichita for the MidSouth Horn Workshop. This was nothing terribly huge - I had been to two before - but what became of it was. I ran into my current horn professor, though, at the time he was not teaching me, nor did I have any inclination that he taught private lessons. My undergrad horn prof. and I ran into him earlier in the spring during the same event in Conway, Arkansas (it was hard not to - he was one of the featured artists of the event). He and I spent about 30 minutes talking about horn playing in the exhibition hall, and I was beyond inspired at that point to continue getting better at horn (obviously something changed in the span of 6 months that changed that mentality, but I digress).
I didn’t think I would ever meet him again, if I’m being 100% honest. But we did. We had run into each other in the student union on the Wichita State University campus. He and my then-current horn teacher had struck up a conversation (I think it was something about what he was up to and if he’d like to play with ESU’s jazz band, since he was on his way through that area in the spring semester). Somehow, someway, the conversation got turned onto me.
“What do you think about grad school?” was the question.
Now, you have to understand, this shook me. My plan was to graduate, go home, and give up. I had no further intention of carrying on playing horn or doing music or any of it. Cowardice.
“Uhhhh,” I stammered. I didn’t honestly think I was cut out for grad school. Sure, I eventually wanted to get my doctorate in something, but that was kind of a pipe dream; something so exceptionally unachievable, that I was better off not thinking about it. “I hadn’t.”
Thus, initiated a 20 minute conversation about grad school and how my now-current horn professor wanted to hear me play and, better yet, attend his school. I’m pretty sure I spent the next like 3 hours waffling about it.
The other horn player that was with us (let’s call him B) slapped some sense into me.
“You should do it, it sounds like an incredible opportunity.” B had said something along the lines of this.
“My main concern is money, etc. etc.” I tried to make excuses back.
“Grad school would be perfect for you. All you really have to do is focus on your playing.” My horn professor told me.
“You didn’t come this far, just to come this far.” B said.
(Slight divergence in the story, my mom just called me as I’m typing this and now I’m having to fight back tears. She sounded so concerned that I’m spending Thanksgiving alone right now. Anyway.)
That struck me hard. I didn’t learn horn just to give up after graduating college. I didn’t play horn for close to 13 years only to run away when the opportunity presented itself. I didn’t quit at any point along the way, no matter how stressful or draining, and I shouldn’t quit now. My mind was made up.
I talked to my now-current horn teacher about how I was interested in studying with him, and about his program and what was offered, etc. He wanted to hear me play but was busy that weekend, so I would need to send him some recordings of my playing. I sent him my senior recital that I played later that semester. Over the course of the next 3 to 4 months, I would graduate from college and then spend the rest of my time working while I finished up the graduate studies application to my school. I was accepted into the program, and got some assistanceship money to help out.
The next 7 months were really nothing to note, as far as this journey is concerned. I worked part time at a gas station, played in a terrible non-paying gig, ended up dropping one of my best friends - a story for another time, but overall, I ended up taking a massive break from my horn. My dad thought that I wasn’t practicing enough and that grad school was gonna kick my ass, but so far, that hasn’t completely happened yet.
The day finally comes. I move to California with my dad’s help. As you can imagine, it’s a whirlwind of a day. Flying 5 hours out, getting my stuff moved in, buying groceries, etc. By the end of the day, its time to say goodbye. Dad can’t stay, because he’s got a flight in the morning for some stuff he’s got going on back home. He tried to fight back his tears, as I am almost about to cry myself. The door closed and now I’m bawling. wow that was a lot of mixed tenses, no im not fixing it, and no i do not take criticism, send tweet
At this point, I felt isolated. I’m in a new place where I know no one and I’m by myself. The first person I bump into is the other horn grad student. He stops by to say hi, I apologize for my terrible playing because I haven’t been playing consistently for the past seven months and oh god I’m rambling. It goes how you expect awkward first meetings to go. The next evening, I meet the two seniors in from the horn studio and a senior clarinet player. I never felt so blind sided by questions, and they were all really chatty. Me, being the awkward human being I am stood there, giving minimal answers, and being overwhelmed by questions about literally everything. Holy shit.
I end up bumping into my now-current horn professor on Monday (let’s call him Prof. A) in the bathroom of the music building, again really fucking awkward. Prof. A told me to go to his office while they finish up the faculty meeting downstairs, and that the other grad horn was in there organizing music. Round 2 is not nearly as awkward, thank god. Around 30 minutes later, Prof. A shows back up and treats us both to Chipotle and a lengthy talk about how we have to be the “heavyweight boxers” of the studio (there was an anecdote in there that makes it all make sense, trust me). Again, holy shit.
The rest of the week goes about how you would expect. It is the week before school after all. I spend most of my time practicing. My roommate shows up. I don’t really run into anyone else in the studio for a few days. Though at the end of the week, we have a horn hang, where most of the studio is in attendance. Super awkward at first, but then it opens up. Then, school kicks off, and its all good from there.
But why am I telling you all of this? Well, first of all, kudos for sitting through my life story up to this point. Second, I think this story is key to a lot of introspection that I need to do. And third, I just need to put this all out there, get it off my chest, you know?
Since coming out to California, I have been unimaginably blessed with perhaps the best family of people I could ever want. I have a great teacher who is helping me be better at doing what I love. I’m surrounded by great, fun loving musicians who want to see others succeed and it’s been such a positive experience being out here. I literally cannot imagine what my life would be like had I not seized this opportunity.
I’ll be the first to admit that grad school so far hasn’t totally met my expectations. I thought that I would immediately get better, that I would excel, have a bunch of friends, get better at playing horn, and maybe (selfishly) find a guy. It wasn’t immediate, and looking back, I don’t think it ever could have been. Because the path I’m on takes work and courage to keep going even when the results don’t seem obvious at all. Also, let’s be 100% real, there was no way in hell I was gonna find a guy within like 2-3 weeks of being here. That’s just not realistic lmfao
Since coming here, I’ve grappled with the feelings of inadequacy and sense of not belonging that come with the territory. Initially, I thought that I was never making progress and that I was never gonna be as good as the other grad horn. I wasn’t a good enough horn player. Why was I here? What made me think that I could make it out here? Thoughts like that. They’ve only intensified as the semester went along.
But my friends have proved me wrong.
The only thing that everyone could and would expect of me is to be myself. Whatever that means, whatever that sounds or looks like. I can’t be anyone else other than me, no matter how tempting it is to compare myself to others. I just gotta follow my own path. This was and still is a hard lesson for me to learn. I don’t think I will ever totally understand it, until I can realize that I am good enough as I am now. I am making progress to get better, but I have to be comfortable with where I’m at now for it to be worth it.
The thought of running away from all of this terrifies me, but it’s a real and almost ever present thought I have. I don’t want to lose the progress I’ve made. I don’t want to turn my back on my friends. I don’t want to give up crazy socks at concerts, ice cream afterwards, playing in horn choir, horn hangs, or just the general screwing around. My horn people are my family, and I won’t turn my back on them because I’m afraid of not being good enough. They have never had reason to think less of me, so I shouldn’t. Even when I do, I’m thankful that they’re there to help me out of my emotional ruts. As long as I am here surrounded by these fantastic people, I will always be good enough and I will always belong.
I didn’t come this far just to get this far. And I will take it all the way. No matter what it takes, because the people closest to me have given me the courage to make it happen.
So, even though I may end up spending my Thanksgiving alone, I’m not alone. I never have been nor will I ever be. My friends, my family, everyone who’s cheering me on from the sidelines, watching and waiting for me to succeed, they’re all with me, no matter how far away they might be. This is what I’m thankful for.
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