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#sorry that answer was a lot and really long
hairmetal666 · 23 hours
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Steve has done interviews before. Like, a lot of interviews. YouTube, podcasts, print, TV stuff. Not as a brag, or anything, just. He's been an influencer for a long time, for better or worse, and it's part of the deal.
Usually, he's comfortable in front of the camera. Usually, he's poised and well-spoken. But today, this time, sweat pools under his arms and beads along his hairline, the lights beating down on him in a harsh glare.
"Steve Harrington," Murray Bauman crosses his legs, smiles big for the cameras. "It's been a while."
He smiles too, tries to seem like he's not about to have a panic attack. "I've been a little busy."
Murray laughs and it's then that Steve understands how screwed he really is. Murray's show, it's all glitz and glamour on the surface; mixed drinks and hijinks until the celebrity guests lose their inhibitions, admitting things they probably wanted to keep secret.
It's just that, before, Steve didn't have any salacious rumors to worry about, and now--
"You've had a rough year, Steve, yeah?"
"Not my best, for sure." He leans back, tries to seem calm, unbothered.
"I was sorry to hear about your divorce. I think that announcement really took a lot of people by surprise."
His hands clench, but he manages not to shift or bounce his leg. "Thanks for, uh. Yeah. We were also sorry it didn't work out."
Murray nods, face full of sympathy. "You and Nancy, you'd been together since high school? That's almost--what? 15 years?"
"It's--" he clears his throat. "About that long." Steve takes a sip of the drink next to him, an apple martini that's both too sweet and too strong.
"Am I right to assume that you didn't see it coming?"
And isn't that a question? Sure, now in hindsight, he can see the fractures that lead to the end, but six months ago did he--it's all so--what if all along--
"All marriages have rough patches," is what he says. "We just couldn't come out of ours as a couple."
"Do you know what I've found really remarkable about this phase of your life? The content and tone of your videos in the midst of the maelstrom of rumors and gossip didn't change at all. 'Your kids' as you call them, are still as bright and vibrant as ever. You're laughing, dancing, cooking, having a great time."
"I needed that--that normalcy you know? And the kids, they're such an important part of my life, having them around helped."
"Including Nancy's brother, Mike?"
Steve laughs and it's not fake. "Totally including Mike. My relationship with Nancy has nothing to do with my relationship with him."
"He's kind of an antagonist--would you say?--in your videos, though."
"We have conflict sometimes, but it's never serious. We know how to play it up for laughs."
"So, nothing's changed between you?"
"Not at all."
"The cheating rumors." Murray's smile is soft, but all the air still leaves the room.
"What about them?" It's more combative than he means, but--
"Did Nancy cheat on you with Jonathan Byers?"
He swallows and it hurts. She did cheat, is the thing. It's not public information, still only speculation, but--
"You can't believe everything you read, Murray."
"So, she didn't cheat?" There's a glow to Murray's eyes that tells Steve he already knows the answer.
"Like, I said before, marriages are hard. We spent a lot of time apart because of our jobs. It took a toll."
"And she was traveling with Jonathan, yes? He's been her photographer for the past decade, from what I understand."
"They were co-workers, but we're all close. And those rumors didn't help our relationship, for sure. It's--not easy to hear that a bunch of people think your wife and close friend may be having an affair, that people 'ship' them. Even when it's not true, it creates--"
"Tension? Distrust?"
"Both, probably." He takes another drink as he nods. "After a while you do start to wonder if there's truth to it, and you're too ignorant or too--too trusting to see it."
"And it eroded the relationship."
"It certainly didn't help." He takes another drink.
"And how about your relationship with Jonathan's brother, Will. Has that been impacted?"
"Of course not. Never. Whatever happens between Nancy, Jonathan, and I, it has nothing to do with the kids. They know that.
"You talked about it."
"Yes. Extensively."
"I know there's often speculation on the relationship you have with them; if you're really close or it's all for the cameras."
"Murray." He leans forward. "We've talked about this before. I met Dustin through Mike, and the whole group followed. I've known them all since they were 8 years old. They're--I mean, not to be cliche, but they're my family." He sips the last bit of martini.
"And where does Eddie Munson fit into that family?"
The question shouldn't be a surprise, but he almost does a spit take, has to fight to keep it together.
"Eddie?"
"Yes." Murray's smile is chilling. "Your close friend Eddie Munson. Musician. Plays Dungeons and Dragons on YouTube. You made out with him in a music video. Ringing any bells?"
"I'm familiar with Eddie," his grin is rigid. "I don't know what that has to do with my marriage ending."
"Well, the rumors weren't all about Nancy, were they?"
"Eddie and I have--we became mutuals online years and years ago. I used one of his songs in a video and the kids are obsessed with his dnd stuff, so. We've become close."
"Friends?"
"Isn't that implied?"
"After that music video, I don't think so."
Steve rolls his eyes, lets the irritation show for the first time. "He asked me to be in his video. There's nothing scandalous about it."
"What's your relationship with Eddie right now?"
"Like I said, friends."
"Do you want it to be more than that?"
"Eddie's really important to me."
"Is that all?"
"Not really sure what you want me to say here, Murray."
"You were married to a woman for years, but now there are questions about your sexuality."
He grits his teeth. "My sexuality isn't anyone's business aside my own. People can say shit on Twitter all they want, that doesn't mean they know me. But--the end of my marriage--it definitely gave me the space for self-discovery, I guess? In a way I hadn't had before."
"And is Eddie a part of that self-discovery?"
"Yeah, as one of my closest friends, he is."
"Do you have feelings for him?"
"That's--that's not--I'm going through a divorce. My focus isn't on starting another relationship right now."
"You, famously, tattooed your initials on the inside of his thigh during an Instagram live. That's pretty intimate."
"We were just having a little fun."
"Huh. That seems like more than 'a little fun' to me. So, how's Eddie doing with the increased attention?"
It takes Steve a second to track the change of subject, mind still stuck on the tattoo, on how the ink had looked on Eddie's pale skin.
"It's hard." Steve eventually answers. "Of course he enjoys bringing his music and dnd to a wider audience, but the focus on his personal life is--it's a lot."
"Well, he should have thought about before letting you tattoo him for your 850,000 followers. Does he want a relationship with you?"
His throat is dry, burning, he wishes he had more martini. He wishes he'd never taken a sip. "You'd have to ask him. I'm just taking it day by day, you know? That's what I need right now."
"We're getting to the end of our time, but you know I have to ask. Your best friend, Robin Buckley, she very famously unfollowed both Nancy and Jonathan on all social media when news broke about your divorce. Can you tell us why she unfollowed them?"
"I have no control over Robin's accounts. I didn't even know she followed Jonathan ever, and she and Nancy have a relationship outside of me, you know? I can't say what happened between them."
"She's been in your videos with Eddie. She like him?"
"Very much. It's kind of annoying actually. They keep ganging up on me."
"Much to everyone's delight, I'm sure. So, what can we expect from the newly single Steve Harrington?"
"There are a couple things in the works, but only time will tell."
---
He walks through his front door an hour later, and Eddie's sitting on the couch, playing a soft melody on an acoustic guitar. He stops when he sees Steve, setting the guitar aside, and standing.
"How'd it go, baby?" He asks. His soft smile is so beautiful, Steve gets a lump in his throat.
"As expected." He crosses the space between them, lets Eddie pull him close.
"He ask about us?" Eddie's breath tickles his ear.
"Of course."
"And you--"
"I want--it should be just for us. We should be able to announce when we're ready. Not when Murray-fucking-Bauman asks."
Eddie kisses him, then, sweet and slow, making him lose his breath.
"Whenever you're ready, I'll be right by your side."
"You sure? All my mess--"
"Is mine too. Afraid you're stuck with me for the long haul, Steve Harrington."
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ghostedeabha · 2 days
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Ooooo oh my god that Simon anesthesia story was so good 😭
And omg What about a flip of that situation?? Kinda based on that one video where the girl is under anesthesia and her boyfriend kisses her and she’s like “THAT CUTE GUY IS KISSIN ME!! :0”
this is such a cute idea, i love it. i hope it's up to your expectations! sorry it took so long and that it's so short T^T
simon 'ghost' riley x reader
wc: 364
warnings: none really, lots of fluff. mentions of surgery, mentions of dental surgery.
a/n: ahhhh first fic since i came back, sorry for the long wait everyone T^T when i regained motivation, i got locked out of my blog for a few hours ans it was very stressful but all is well now and i'm really trying to stick to writing now, so send in all your ideas n requests!
if you were to rate how you felt on a scale of 1 to 10 right now, you’d probably answer 11 with a giggle just from how whacked you were from the anesthesia after your surgery.
simon couldn't take you seriously right now, and it was kind of adorable actually, trying to stiffle his laughter at how shy you were acting around him as if he wasn't your boyfriend.
“how’re you feelin’ there, luv?” he asks with a grin on his face.
“’m great, thanks doctor.”
oh cute. you thought he was your doctor.
“you know who i am, (name)?” simon chuckles.
“i… definitely do. yes.” you reply slowly, confusion evident in your voice but you were determined to not give away the fact that your memory was hazy right now.
“do you now?” another soft chuckle leaves simon as he continues to press you. he leans a little closer to you, suppressing his chuckles when your face begins to burn a little redder from his proximity to you.
“mhm.” you nod, looking up at the man who was clearly trying to tease you into an oblivion.
“well that’s good.” simon says, tipping your head back to look up at him with a gentle grasp on your chin, his tumb and forefinger gripping your face softly yet firmly.
he leans down to press a quick, loving kiss to your lips and the reaction you have is absolutely priceless to simon.
your face is as red as a strawberry and your eyes are wide like dinner plates as you stare up at him in pure shock and awe. simon can't help but let out another, deep chuckle at your reaction.
meanwhile, your mind is racing a million miles a minute.
this cute guy just kissed me! oh my gosh! what do i do? what am i supposed to do?! he just kissed me!
when the man speaks up, you swear you’ve never felt dumber as the memories come back to you like a flood.
“i’m your boyfriend, darlin’. simon, remember?”
you have never felt more embarrassed in your life.
and simon’s never felt more in love.
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For the bad Sanses, if their SO would want to grow old and die, would they respect that?
Agh... well. Short answer? No. Long answer? No, absolutely not.
Horror, I think, would come the closest to actually respecting your decision. He has Papyrus to support him so he wouldn't have to go through it completely alone. He's experienced a lot of loss, and he knows the pain of seeing people you love hang around long after they should've gone, deteriorating into someone you hardly recognise. But also... he's just really not in the right frame of mind to let you go. Horror does not love in halves and the thought of losing you is like a point-blank shot to the Soul. If you bring it up, best reaction you'll get is him being confused and then pretending you didn't even talk about it, and the worst is a full smashing-things-flipping-tables-throwing-chairs meltdown. You might get a better response from Papyrus. He'll try to mediate. Perhaps give it a few years, once he's had time to ease.
If you press Dust about it, he will give you an ultimatum. If you really, really want to grow old and die, the relationship is over. You can die, if you like. But don't expect him to watch. He knows that when you go, part of him goes too, and at least this way his time feeling warm and whole again ends on his terms. He can sink back into the dark by choice. You get your wish, but you'll never see him again. He'll be pretty sour grapes about it (and about you) if you do end up choosing to die. As far as he's concerned you chose your mortality over him. He doesn't respect it or understand why. He feels abandoned and betrayed... and he refuses to reminisce positively on something that hurts so much to think about. Someone bringing up your name is enough to start a brawl.
Killer doesn't understand. You want to die? You want to leave him behind? You want him to be alone again - how could you say that? You don't mean that. If you hold your ground and tell him you really mean it, he'll tell you he's fine with it, but he's a bald-faced liar. Whilst Dust is bitter, Killer is shattered; he really thought he found someone who would stay by his side no matter what. The rug has gone out from under him. Now he's facing the prospect of being utterly alone again, surrounded only by the voices that still taunt him even now. He fully retreats into his own head... he acts like he's silly and fine, but his Soul has never been more red. You'll never see his white eyelights again.
Nightmare... uh, no. Sorry. He laughs it off like you're a kid telling him you want to eat a billion cookies. He thinks he knows better than you, in this regard, you don't really want to die, you'll understand in a few hundred years. He's a reasonable lover in most aspects but this is one of few things he doesn't budge on. Part and parcel of being a God's beloved, I'm afraid. D'aw, you want to grow old and die? Sure he'll let you. Aren't you cute. Just don't pay attention to how wrinkles never form on your skin. I'm sure it's nothing.
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wandascrush · 3 days
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Runaway Bride
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Summary: There’s only one person you really want on your wedding day
Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Fem!Reader
Warnings: Weddings, love, crying, running away, lots of angst
Song: Someday I’ll get it by Alek Olsen
You were out of breath by the time you got there, crisp cold air hurting your chest. Your throat was as dry as sandpaper. Natasha was there, waiting for you like she always was. Your legs were tired from running, broken nude heels in your hands, beautiful and forgotten. The white flowy, soft fabric of your dress touched your body delicately, dragging and picking up the color from the wet mossy grass. Sore legs lowered down to sit on the grass next to the girl who once captured your heart…but she was silent. Just you two, alone. The air was so cold it hurt your bones. 
   You rested your head against the large oak tree that sat behind you two, making a little cove under its branches. So many thoughts were racing through your mind, “I’ve ruined everything. What will people think? I have to say sorry.” But once you saw your favorite spot waiting for you, with your favorite girl, everything melted away. You shouldn’t even be here right now, you shouldn’t have been thinking about Natasha, but she was the only person that ran through your mind. 
   “Long time no see, Natty.” 
    You’ve gotten used to her silence though, it kind of became her new character trait these days. Sometimes you pretended it didn’t hurt anymore, but it always did. A little more each time. Rain droplets started to fall around you, wetting every inch of dirt and stone. More green from the grass started to slowly seep into the beautiful white fabric of your dress. You knew her deep gaze was on you, looking at you with pity…maybe with love? 
   Your chest tightened as you blinked hard, vision blurring, “I was supposed to get married today, you know,” a sad laugh escaped your throat as you played with the fabric of your dress, “I looked beautiful. My hair was done and my makeup was perfect and-I was supposed to be happy today,” you whispered, your voice cracking. “I was supposed to be standing at that altar, looking into her eyes, promising forever. But I couldn’t even say the words. Because every time I looked at her, I saw you. And I hated myself for it.”
 “I’m so tired of missing you…and funny enough, I thought getting married would make me happier. But all I see is you. When I say my vows, it’s your name they’re written for.”
I think of you all the time, now that you’re gone.
    The rain poured down in relentless sheets, soaking through the dress. The sky above was a swirling mass of dark clouds and angry wind. Digging your manicured fingers into the soft mud, it felt like the only grounding thing. The feeling of mud seeping under your nails was the only anchor you had.
   You checked your phone, trying to wipe the rain off of it and realized that you’d already been there for over an hour with Natasha. You needed to get back, answer all the missed calls and texts. This would be the last time you two saw each other…something inside you was certain about it. Shaky legs stood up, using the big oak tree as support and grabbing the bouquet you forgot about next to you. 
   You slowly kneeled down in front of your first love, first everything, and pressed your forehead against her cold grave stone, “If love could have saved you,” breaths came in short, sharp gasps, salty tears falling into your mouth, “you would have lived forever, my Natasha.” Soft lips kissed the engraving of her name as you gently lied the bouquet down for her, grabbed your broken heels, and said goodbye. It took all your strength to not look back as you walked out of the private cemetery.
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hahaifolded · 2 days
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141 x POC!GN Intelligence Operative - Thanks for the ride (Long Drabble) Author's Notes: Personally this one is the worst one of the four. Also I didn't expect this to be this long. Warnings: MDNI, Angst
Did Soap enjoy being a little shit? Most of the time. But when it involved hurting you, even disguised as Price’s doing, he couldn’t find any joy in it. He may have successfully ruined Price in your eyes but at what cost?
He knew that you would only take so much of this. He wasn’t stupid. You will snap one day and all of their efforts to keep you will end up being futile. But some sick part of him hoped that you liked them enough to stay. That’ll you’ll hold out as much as they have so far.
And if you hold out long enough, maybe, just maybe, Soap can outlast the others. It’s only a matter of time before the others get over their little crush. Right?
But until then, he’ll be waiting. He’ll keep his distance but he’ll come as soon as you start calling.
Like now, as his phone lights up with your name. It’s Friday morning and he’s currently spotting Gaz on the bench press when his phone starts to ring. His heart jumps when he sees your name. He swipes his phone and answers it.
“Sergeant MacTavish,” he says. He cringes at his words.
“Sergeant,” you start. He could cry. He’s not just your sergeant, he’s Johnny, your Johnny-boy. “I am so sorry to bother you so early but I didn’t know who else to call.” He could tell from the tone of your voice that you were in trouble. He turns around to avoid Kyle from overhearing.
“What’s wrong? Are you okay?”
“Yes, I'm okay, but... I... I'm on my way to base, but my car just broke down. I'd walk but I won't make it on time to today's meeting if I do. Is there anyway you can pick me up? I'll pay for gas and your time. Again, I am so sorry for bother--"
"It's not a bother. I'll be there in 10." He hangs up the phone before you can say anything else. Soap was truly God's favorite. Despite everything, you still called him. And like always, he'll answer.
"Everything good there, buddy?" pipes up Gaz.
"Yeah, yeah, don't worry. Uh... just one of the techs," Soap explains. He grabs his bag and tells Gaz he has to go... "bomb emergency." He leaves and rushes to his room. He zips through his room, trying to change into something less sweaty. He wasn't sure why, but his heart was racing.
Was he nervous?
Of course he was nervous.
This would be the first time in over a month that you called him for something that didn't involve a mission. There would be no Ghost, no Price, no Gaz to get in his way. He sprays some perfume that you had gotten him for his birthday, grabs his keys, and runs out of his room.
It's just a straight shot - straight down the hall and to the parking lot. Should be easy?
Wrong.
Waiting for him at the door was his fellow sergeant, Kyle Gaz Garrick.
"Where you going there, buddy? Isn't techs on the other side of the base?" He stands up straight, staring the Scotsman down.
Soap does the same. One way or another, he was going to give you that ride. "It is, but it'll be faster if I drive there. So if you can move, you'd make my day." He tries to side-step Gaz, but Gaz stay still. "Move!" Soap tries to push his teammate. Kyle pushes back, pinning him up against the wall, his arm over his neck.
"Did you really think I wouldn't notice? Mate, your brightness and volume were all the way up ," he scoffs. "You really think I'm going to let you be the hero here."
"Get off!" Soap roars. He shoves Kyle back and punches him in the gut, forcing the sergeant to fall to his knees. However, it does nothing to stop him as Kyle lunges at the Scotsman, forcing him on the floor. They tussle for a bit before two pairs of arms pull the sergeants off from one another.
"What the hell is going on here?" commands Price. He has Soap in his grip while Ghost grabs Gaz.
"Soap here is trying to see them without us," Gaz spits out. Soap feels Price's hold on him tighten. Soap tries to explain himself. How you had called HIM for a ride and he was just trying to be a good teammate.
Price lets out an empty laugh. "Just like how I was trying to help with lunch." Fuck. Soap knew that was going to bite him in the ass, but he didn't think so soon. Ghost lets Gaz go. Gaz walks towards Soap and snatches the keys from his hands.
Soap tries to stop him, but it's no use, Price isn't budging.
And you of course don't know that all of this is going back on base. You're stuck in your car, waiting for Soap to come pick you up. You weren't happy that you called him, but you really had no choice. The bus had already passed, you didn't have enough time to walk, and it looked like it was going to rain. Besides, Soap said it wasn't a bother.
15 minutes have passed and you were starting to get antsy. The meeting was going to start soon and Soap still hadn't come by. You decide to text him... worst case, he's driving and can't answer.
You: Hey! Sorry to bother, but are you close? Again thank you so much for the ride
You put your phone down and look out the window.
Buzz, buzz.
Johnny-boy: Something came up. Sorry.
No fucking way. You could cry right now. And not even out of disappointment, but out of anger. You don't even bother to answer. You turn off your phone and jump out of your car. At this point, it didn't even matter. You were going to be late either way. What's the point of giving them a heads up?
And to your luck, it starts to rain... hard. Could your day get any worse? Fuck, your month, really? Whatever you did, there's no way it was that bad to deserve all of this.
You were so caught up in your thoughts that you didn't hear the racing car blasting rock music behind you.
Back on base, Soap is close to just dying in his seat. The 141 are all in the conference room, waiting for your arrival. Gaz and Price are in their seats while Ghost blocks the door. He can see his phone in his Lieutenant's pocket.
Soap begs him to let him go. It's pouring out there and knowing how stubborn you could be, you're probably walking in this weather.
Price shoots him a pointed look. "You really think I'd let them walk in this rain. I already sent some rookies to pick them up." And on cue, his phone rings. "Look, it's the rookies."
Price answers the phone. But instead, of keeping his neutral face, he just frowns. "What do you mean they're not there?" Soap's blood runs cold. Price argues with the rookies for a bit until he hangs up. The room tenses. Everyone looks at Price with baited breath. They all assume the worst. But before anyone can even suggest it, the door opens.
"141! My favorite team! How are... what's with the long faces?" The men all pause. They all had forgotten that Nikolai was going to help them on this next op.
"Nik, not the time," Price grumbles out. All of the men agree. Right now, you were missing and it was all their fault.
Nik gets serious and takes a seat. He assures them that things will work out. Once you finish changing, you can all brainstorm and find a solution.
Once you finish changing?
Soap makes the connection first. He asks Nik if you were on base.
"Da. Found them on my way here." Soap could just cry out of joy. You were okay. You were alive.
His joy is cut short when you come in. You don't say anything. You take your seat at the end of the table.
You look at all of them with indifference, with apathy. "Let's get started."
Soap calls your name. He wasn't sure what he was going to say. All he knew was that he needed to talk to you.
You glare at him. "Sergeant MacTavish, we've wasted enough time today. Let's just do our job," you spit out. You reel in your anger. You were done with Soap, with this team, with everyone.
Soap sinks in his seat. He didn't think you were capable of hatred.
Word Count: 1450
More Thoughts - Next Thought
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suhkusa · 2 days
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You shiver a bit as the cool air breezes by, leaving goosebumps in their wake.
The team should’ve been released already, now all you had to do was wait for Atsumu to come out.
You’re able to see Saki at a distance. She’s on her phone, a straight look on her face. You’re definitely on edge about her. But hey, if that’s Osamu’s girlfriend, you weren’t going to judge his taste. You’d only squint at it from afar.
You jump as a rough arm swings around your shoulder, pulling you close. 
“So, are you treating me out for winning today, or what?” the familiar voice quickly turns your worry to relief.
“God, you scared me,” 
Atsumu laughs at your surprised expression, guiding you along the sidewalk, “So? Don’tcha think I deserve it?”
You being your finger up to your chin in false thought, “Hmm, I don’t know,”
“Please, they said I was MVP,”
“Nah, I think it was ‘Samu,” he pouts at your words.
“You weren’t even watching! You were on your phone!”
He was looking at you?
“Nuh uh,” you deny, “But yeah, I’ll treat you somewhere, what are you feeling?”
Atsumu’s arm finally releases you, as he cheers and begins to list off his cravings.
——
The two of you get take-out from a nearby restaurant (you pay of course), before driving to a park in the area to settle down and eat.
You’re mid-bite when Atsumu asks, “What do you think of Saki?”
Your eyes widen before you quickly gulp down what’s in your mouth, “Um, she’s… alright?”
Atsumu laughs, “You don’t like her, huh?”
Your eyes wander awkwardly, giving him enough of an answer. “Me neither,” his answer shocks you a bit.
“Really?” you say before repeating back Saki’s words to Atsumu.
“She said that?” Atsumu dusts his hands off on a napkin. “To you?”
You nod, “Weird, right?”
The two of you share your worries and doubts regarding Saki, and for the most part, you’re in full agreement.
You finish your food shortly after he did. Atsumu collects the trash and disposes it nearby. 
“Care for a walk?” he holds his hand out to you.
You hesitate a bit before taking it, “Sure,”
It’s silent for a while until he finally breaks it.
“So, the kiss,” his words knock the breath out of you. “Let’s talk about it?”
All you do is nod. You’re scared. You completely forgot about the kiss. You were so caught up in the moment that it didn’t even cross your mind.
“I’m sorry it was out of nowhere, and I didn’t even ask,” he starts, “I’m sorry if you were uncomfortable,”
Your head snaps towards him, “What? Nono, it’s okay, I- I didn’t mind,” heat rushes to the tips of your ears.
It’s silent again. Your steps are out of rhythm with his, but you still match his pace.
It’s another moment before he stops walking where he is. You take another step before freezing as well.
“I like you, Y/N,” Atsumu says, your eyes finally meet his golden ones, “Like, a lot,”
Your gaze widens just slightly, and it feels like the words slipped out of yours, too, “I like you, too, ‘Tsumu,”
It’s not very long until his lips are on yours once again, head and heart filled with him and only him.
———
Even after the sentimental moment, the car ride back was twice as awkward than earlier moments. What were the two of you now? You weren’t sure. You weren’t even sure if you wanted to date right away.
“Are we like, dating or—”
“Not yet,” you swiftly cut him off, still with a light tone.
He nods in understanding. 
Your hand reaches over to his free one, your thumb smoothing over the back of his hand.
You were happy. This was good and you were happy with your relationship with Atsumu.
What more could you ask for?
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BOTH AIN’T SH!T — NERVES
PREV | MASTERLIST | NEXT
NOTES.
new arc
atsumu would look at y/n every timeout and new set
^ and so would another certain someone
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© all writings belongs to suhkusa 2024. do not repost or change.
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meanbossart · 3 days
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Hello! I love your art!
Quick question, what are Du Drow thoughts on art work? My tav has a pretty cheerful personality, would Du Drow be cool with posing for drawings of him or if he catch the sketchbook with these sketchs?
He's actually... Kinda of really into art in general. Not into it in the sense that he's interested in the history behind it or technicalities of making art, but he appreciates when music, writing or illustrative work speaks to him in some way. As an active Bhaalspawn, he used to really like theater and still has a little muscle memory for dancing left.
Sorry for hijacking your question with that, but nobody had ever asked about his opinions on art before and I got excited LOL now for the actual answer.
DU drow is most likely to turn down an offer like that, since he couldn't justify spending precious time of his day posing for someone. BUT, under the right circumstances he would be extremely flattered and be REALLY into the idea of someone documenting his physique or turning it into a work of art - hell, he already thinks of his body as a work of art, might as well make it official. He'd similarly enjoy catching someone drawing him, as long as he had no reason to think they're documenting his identity for a malicious reason (he has a lot of crimes under his belt, after all).
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baby steps. l Joel Miller
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Summary: you were his very quiet companion on patrols
Warnings:  angst, a little bit of swearing, mentioning pregnancy, mentioning loss of a child, mentioning abortion, mentioning suicidal thoughts, generally - a lot of unpleasant things, Reader is 30s or sth, I guess
A/N: I've had this idea in my head for a long time. There are some not so nice things (read the Warnings!) but I hope the whole story won't be so awful. your feedback is very important to me and I thank you for all the reblogs, comments and likes. 🖤 sorry for all the mistakes
and i would like to thank you for the few kind words i have received recently. it scared me but was very nice. thank you!
The first time he met you was at Tipsy Bison when Tommy told him you would be his new partner on patrols. Footsteps were barely audible, and then a chair on the other side of the table moved and you sat down. 
Your eyes stopped on Joel's face for a moment, you nodded in greeting. The name quietly fell from your lips, and then you focused on the map that Tommy had spread out on the table.
Joel wasn't sure if you understood what his brother was saying to you. You were silent, sometimes nodding your head, nothing more.
"Is she even good for this?" Joel finally muttered as you said goodbye and left.
"What do you mean?" Tommy folded the map and put it in his jacket pocket.
Joel raised his eyebrows "She seems a little... I don't know. Distant?"
A quiet laugh escaped Tommy's lips "Really? And who's talking?" he took a few sips of coffee "Joel, you wouldn't patrol together if I wasn't sure she was good. She may not be the life of the party, but she's great at what she does."
Joel had the impression that he had seen you a few times in Jackson, but you were one of those people who kept their distance from others. So he looked like that to others too?
It was only the first patrol with you that made him change his mind about you, but he wasn't sure yet if this change was for the better. 
You were definitely not one of those people who needed to talk. Small talk wasn't for you, but you listened very carefully. 
The area around Jackson was no stranger to you, just like handling a gun. So Joel got used to you, and over time he even managed to get some information out of you.
You had been in Jackson for almost five years, you lived alone in a small apartment. You were alone. "That's the best way." No family or close friends, except for Maria. You were patrolling and searching for supplies. He was also sure he saw you in the library, but he never asked about it.
After a few months, Joel could clearly tell that you were the right person for the job. He even managed to make you laugh a few times or talk a little longer. You never asked him about the past, and when he asked you about it, you answered "We're at an age where everyone has some background, right? But not everything is suitable for talking about it."
"Your girlfriend seems nice." Ellie stated one day, and seeing his confused face added "I talked to her today. She said that this crap didn't let her finish high school, so now she's catching up on school readings. If I were her, I wouldn't bother. School sucks."
The warm coffee warmed his tired body, but after a moment he spoke up "You talked to her? When? And... She's not my girlfriend."
Ellie shrugged "We talk a lot. And you don't? You spend a lot of time together, I thought that..."
"You were wrong." Joel mumbled "Did she say anything else?"
The girl looked at him carefully. "You really don't know her very well, do you?"
He wasn't sure if he knew you at all. Did he have the right to demand that from you? You did your job thoroughly, he could rely on you, and despite everything you were still standing somewhere in the shadows, hiding from everyone.
"Is everything okay with you?"
Your voice tore him out of his reverie for a moment. You were walking through a quiet area, the fading grass crunching under your feet, and the cold wind slowly became more and more severe.
"Yeah, everything's okay." he replied, glancing at you over his shoulder "I was lost in thought."
"I saw. Good thoughts?"
Joel cleared his throat and stopped, and a moment later you stood in front of him, looking at him uncertainly. 
You really liked him. Miller might seem like a grump, but his personality didn't bother you at all. Women in Jackson also said he was handsome. You had a lot of time to watch him outside the city, you had to admit they were right too. But that wasn't what mattered, was it? You felt safe with him and you trusted him, that was important.
"Doesn't Ellie tire you out?" he asked finally.
"What?" you burst out laughing "Come on. I like her. She asks a lot of questions, but she's a cool girl. I remember when I was her age..."
You stopped as if the thought slowed down your thinking the moment it appeared in your head. Joel saw your eyes wandering around the area with an unseeing gaze.
"Were you her age when this started?" he asked, but you shook your head slightly "Older?"
"Not much." Your voice was quiet but calm "I was a senior in high school. It seems so stupid now... I had a crush on this one guy, fuck, I don't know why I thought of him now."
"It was important back then." Joel mumbled, absorbing your every word. "And your family?"
"They died. A long time ago." The answer was quick, but emotionless. "Why do you ask?"
Joel shrugged. "I don't know. Just like that. Maybe I'd like to get to know you better."
You nodded, analyzing his words for a moment. "You're weird sometimes, Miller." You finally stated. "Conversations like this don't lead anywhere. They only reopen old wounds."
You adjusted your rifle strap and moved forward.
Fall had come for good, and you were slowly starting to withdraw even more. He could see it. Patrols were almost completely silent, he rarely saw you among people or at evening community meetings. 
Even Ellie convinced him that something was going on, because when he asked her she said that she hadn't talked to you in a while.
"It's that time of year." Maria said when he asked her about you too, he was helping her fix the heating in her house. "You should get used to it, Joel. But... I didn't know you were so interested in her."
"It's not like that." he mumbled, but he felt a strange warmth creep up the back of his neck. "She's my partner on patrol. I want to know that she's okay."
"I get it." Maria nodded and sat down on the couch. "Have you talked to her?"
"I've tried, but you know perfectly well that it's not easy. You're her friend." the woman smiled gently. "Is there something she's not telling me?"
"A lot of things, Joel. Just like you, she's not very open to confiding. And this time of year..." she looked out the window where the wind was playing with the fallen leaves. "You should talk to her yourself, if you care about her. But you can also forget about it, be like everyone else, pass her on the street and just let her be. It shouldn't be that hard for you, right?"
And that was something he couldn't get out of his head.
When he saw that guy instead of you the next morning, a strange shiver ran down his spine. "She's sick." Mark said, pushing leather gloves onto his hands. "I'll replace her."
Joel nodded and they set off on patrol. However, his thoughts kept returning to you, he analyzed your last meeting, the last words you exchanged. You were even more subdued. He had the impression that he was forcing the next words out of you, and you just wanted to leave, to disappear.
"She's weird, but pretty." Mark replied when they took a break for hot coffee and a sandwich. "A few guys hit on her, but nothing came of it. Actually, I was hoping that you and her, you know..." he winked at Joel. "But maybe she's that type of person."
"What type?" Joel asked, chewing a bite of his sandwich.
"In times like these, people need each other. They want to at least pretend that things are normal." Mark explained, reaching for the thermos of coffee "And others simply adapt to it. They don't want to have anyone close to them, because it's risky, you know. I guess she's like that. A lone wolf."
But Joel wasn't entirely sure, because he knew you from a slightly different side, or at least that's what he thought. When he showed up at your door that evening, only silence greeted him. And it was the same for the next few days.
"Yeah, she's still in Jackson." Maria was sure of her words "I visited her yesterday, but I don't think..."
That was enough for him. That strange fear was creeping into Joel's heart again. He didn't know why. He was afraid, and all his thoughts kept running to you. It was as if a strange force was pulling him towards you.
"Hey! It's me. Open up." he knocked on your door, but it didn't help "I know you're there. I want to talk. You can't keep hiding."
No answer.
"I can easily break down this door." he declared "I'll make a mess and you'll just be embarrassed. I can do this, you know that. So... On three?" he cleared his throat as if he was preparing to actually do it "One!" Nothing. "Two!" he thought he heard quiet footsteps on the other side. He was about to open his mouth when the door opened slightly and he saw your face.
"You'll hurt your shoulder. It'll be my fault and you'll be excluded from patrols for a long time." you said "That's pointless. Go away."
"I'm not going until you talk to me." Joel replied, his dark eyes full of stubbornness that you knew so well "You can't keep hiding."
"Maybe I'm sick?"
"You don't seem to be."
And then with one strong push he opened the door and before you could stop him he went inside. His gaze swept the apartment, he heard your protests but didn't care. 
Like a storm he passed through the small living room, peeked into the kitchen and when he entered the bedroom he found what he was looking for.
"Fuck! Get out of here!" you hissed, rushing after him, but then you noticed the bottle of whiskey he had taken from your nightstand.
"And these are bedtime snacks?" he growled, throwing a box full of medicines to the floor. "You robbed a fucking pharmacy?"
"None of your business!" you replied, he saw the fury in your eyes. "You're the last person who should be judging me."
"Or maybe I can, because I'm the only one who's ever shown up at your fucking door? What did you want to do, huh?" he put the bottle down with a bang and walked up to you, but you didn't take a single step back. "We were supposed to find you only when the stairwell started to stink? Did you think about Maria? About Ellie? That girl really likes you. Did you think about..."
About me.
Your gaze, although full of tears, was unwavering. You stood there, arms folded across your chest, your throat constricted so tightly that you couldn't swallow.
"Joel..." his name sounded like a prayer in your mouth. "I don't know what you were thinking, but this doesn't concern you. You shouldn't even be here. I tried to keep you out of this."
"Why?" his voice was a little calmer "Why are you like this? I can't figure it out. At first I thought we just didn't know each other well, but after so many months. I heard how freely you talked to Maria, Tommy said that you used to babysit their kid. I don't understand it!"
You closed your eyes as if his words brought you pain, as if they evoked all the emotions in you that you wanted to hide. Tears ran down your cheeks, and a quiet sob escaped your throat.
"I don't know how to deal with this, Joel..." you whispered after a moment, looking at him with eyes full of pain "It all hurts me so much. Every day. Patrols with you were an escape for me, you didn't ask stupid questions, I could feel safe there. But it's all always for a moment."
Joel approached you, his warm hand caressed your arm "You can tell me everything, you know that." you nodded "Come on, sit down."
He closed the bedroom door behind you as if he was leaving something unpleasant and bad there, and then sat down next to you on the couch. When you calmed down a bit, you looked at him like never before, almost with tenderness.
"When I came to Jackson, five years ago, I wasn't alone." you started slowly.
"Were you with someone? With some group?" Joel frowned, trying to remember that detail that must have escaped his attention.
You shook your head. "No, Joel. I wasn't alone, because I was pregnant."
Something twisted his guts. He didn't expect this.
"It was the middle of the seventh month, I guess. It's hard to get regular doctor's visits these days." The little joke was probably meant to lighten the mood, but even you didn't smile. "I've had a long journey. I was alone. Almost." you took a deep breath, and Joel felt his hands go cold and trembling in an instant. "It's funny, you know. Long time ago, women my age already had two kids. And I was completely unplanned pregnant and I hated every single day. I didn't want this baby, but it was there. It was growing. It was alive. I could feel it."
"What about the father?" Joel asked quietly.
A strange grimace crossed your face at the mere memory. "He wasn't father material, if that's what you mean. Some random guy. You know, as women we have another bargaining chip. Something that really tempts some men. Something we can use to survive."
He knew perfectly well what you meant. He had seen many women like that, but he didn't judge them. Everyone did what they had to to survive.
"He was nice, if that's any consolation. We stuck together for a while, and then we went our separate ways. After a while, I found out I was pregnant. But I didn't have anyone or anything at hand to help me solve this... problem." you rubbed your forehead with your hand as if you wanted to get rid of bad memories "Some guy told me about someone who could get rid of it manually, but I was afraid of infection. Then it was too late. Days and weeks passed, and I hated myself and this baby. The nausea was killing me. I was no longer good at smuggling. I also had no idea what I would do with a crying newborn... I got to Jackson, I thought maybe someone here would help me. Maria was so wonderful." a faint smile appeared on your lips, but you weren't even looking at Joel anymore. Your gaze was fixed on your clasped hands "I started bleeding a few days after I arrived. Then everything happened so quickly... The doctor at the clinic couldn't do anything. I had to give birth, but... There was so much blood... And silence. There was no baby crying."
Joel felt as if a heavy stone was resting in his stomach. He couldn't tear his eyes away from your face, but he couldn't say any words that could comfort you. And what the hell would they sound like. But you didn't wait for that, the words slowly flowed from your lips. 
"The doctor said that my body was too weak, that long fatigue, improper diet, that he was too weak... I had a son. He was so small when Maria put him in my arms... And he was so perfect. I was so afraid that his crying would bring trouble to us, that he decided to be quiet."
"I'm sure it wasn't your fault..." Joel finally choked out "Things like that..."
"Happens. I know that." You interrupted him calmly "But it was my fault, Joel. When I saw him... I would have given my life so he could cry, so I could know he was healthy and strong. How could I have ever thought otherwise? What kind of person am I?"
Your voice broke. You looked exhausted and tired of life. Joel understood your guilt perfectly, he knew what you felt. Sarah appeared in his head in an instant.
"I had a daughter." His voice broke the long silence between you. "I lost her right at the beginning."
"I'm sorry." Your voice was quiet, but full of something that gave him some relief.
"After everything I wanted..." he cleared his throat "I wanted to do the same thing you wanted. I even tried, but... I know how you feel, it's so devastating, and it will never get easier."
"I still have him in my mind, you know. He'd be five now. He'd ask a thousand questions, and I'd have to make sure he doesn't get into trouble. Sometimes I think about what it would be like, but then I hate myself even more... I didn't want him. I wanted to get rid of him. Maybe it's because of this..."
"Don't say that." Joel grabbed your hands and squeezed them tightly. "You might have thought so. You were alone, and this world had gone mad. You got into Jackson, you could be safe here, but... These things happen."
You watched him carefully. Never before had you and Joel spoken so intimately, but you didn't feel embarrassed by it. On the contrary, it was the first time someone had really meant it when they said "I understand you."
"I'm sure Sarah was beautiful." you said quietly.
"She was. And very smart. Much smarter than me." Joel added. "She probably would have gone to college or something."
For a moment, silence reigned again. You had the impression that you were both lost in your thoughts about the losses that affected you. You weren't beating each other, you just allowed yourselves to feel it all again.
"Did you really want to kill yourself?" his question brought you back to reality for a moment.
You nodded. "Look at me, Joel. I have nothing, no one. I don't know if I could ever get close to someone again. And all these thoughts only make me feel worse. Sometimes I wish I didn't have to feel anything anymore."
He understood it perfectly. After Sarah died, he felt that this world wasn't for him. Every day was torture, and the longer it lasted, the more he closed himself in his shell. Years passed, and Joel barricaded himself so much that no one and nothing could get him out. 
And then Ellie appeared.
"You know..." he began uncertainly trying to find the right words. "I know what I'm going to say will seem pointless to you, but sometimes it's worth gritting your teeth and trying to live on. Not jumping into the deep end right away, but slowly, day by day. I know that your son..."
The name you gave him when you saw his face for the first time came out of your mouth. Joel repeated it gently.
"Your son would have a really fantastic mother." he said "I'm sorry you had to go through this. I really am."
Tears flowed down your cheeks and Joel struggled to put his arm around you so that you could snuggle up to him. You clung to him, and for the first time he felt the warmth of your body, your scent, your tender touch when you hugged him.
You sat like that for a long time. For the first time you talked about everything and nothing, he heard your quiet laughter a few times and noticed how much he liked it. It was all like honey to his heart. The feeling of loneliness he had disappeared when you were next to him.
He saw you the next day on patrol. It was the first sunny morning in a long time.
"Hi." Your quiet voice was the best thing he'd heard in a long time.
"Baby steps, right?" He nudged your shoulder lightly.
You smiled and followed him.
☆☆☆
Thank you for your time.
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the-kr8tor · 2 days
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I'm sorry about the last one I just got way too excited to express my admiration for your works, I forgot to check!! But I've checked now and I saw The "Imagine if Hobie was prowler" that actually sounds really cool!! I was thinking if you could write something about that, maybe Reader is someone who he cares a lot for but it turns out they're also fighting against each other, (I haven't actually tackled the whole Universe of spiderman so I was genuinely just thinking of Reader as someone with powers TvT) but yeah I got a bit curious about that, I'm not sure if you wrote about that yet since I haven't went in all the master list and hopefully I don't finish it yet cause I'd be left with the deep emptiness (I love all the series so finishing it while it's ongoing would devastate medhdhx) but if you did you can discard my message or if this is too much, that's alright!!
Oh and I'm really happy I didn't make you Uncomfortable it's my first time writing something to a writer and I got anxious TvT I hope you have a great day!!
No worries! You're good! I put my own spin on it, I hope you like it! ❤️
Pairing: Hobie Brown x gn! Reader/ Prowler! Hobie Brown x gn! Reader
Word count: 1k
Tags: No use of Y/N, no specific physical description of the reader, cw blood, cw violence, cw injury, tw death, Prowler! Hobie, Venom! Reader, ANGST.
ʕ⁠·⁠ᴥ⁠·⁠ʔ
The air runs cold, and your breath staggers in your throat. The fighting around you hasn't stopped, nor all the screaming, and bleeding flesh. But everything seems to cease when you see him. The noises deafen, debris and blood stilling in the air— Hobie in all his glory, covered in metal and crimson iron. Hobie, whose face is obscured by steel plates over his familiar face, purple smoke ebbing out of his suit. And yet, despite his rough and intimidating exterior, despite his sharp claws and sharper gaze, your heart still longs for him. He still feels like home.
Home, you haven't thought of it in years, the trees that dance in the wind, soft lavender wandering through the air. And your little house in the middle of the fields you once shared with him. A house that now ceased to exist, burned to ashes, nothing left but dark soot and blackened smoke that seemed endless. Ever burning, flames still snaking along the lavender fields, forever burying your memories with him under the red hungry flames. Those memories still live with you, deep down. You hope it still lives with him. If not, you'd rip it from your heart and hand it to him in your waiting ruby drenched palms.
“H-Hobie?” You ask in a broken tone, even though your soul knows him from where you stand. In between gore soaked bodies, bodies you've ripped and chewed yourself— he stands there motionless. You wonder if he still bears the warmth you used to hold in your arms.
The metal bridge creaks and squeaks, hinges about to give up from the stress of the fighting in its steel embrace. Tethering close to devouring every soul standing on its last life. You've felt the earth collapse years ago. If the ground fell from under you, would you notice?
Hobie doesn't answer, you see his chest rise and fall, gauntlets leaking blood. You don't know if it's his or someone else's, you just know it's not yours. Not yet. Would he hurt you?
You stand there, all worn out, arms bleeding and throbbing, legs trembling from the sheer pain. And yet, your eyes never leave his own mechanical mask, as if you can see the worry behind the steel curtains.
He stands there, heart ripped out, still beating atop the bodies laid out in front of him. He stands there, but he should walk towards you, run towards you and hold you. Hold you like he once had in that lavender field he once called home, hold you as if he didn't lose you all those years ago.
To live in his delusion, to never leave from the haze of the past. He longs for it, to stay where he once held you.
But the blackened tendrils coming out of your wounds is the one that he's fighting against. It curls around you, wrapping you in its mass. White eyes in place of your own that he sees in his dreams, sharp claws and lolling tongue— he doesn't see you anymore. Can't see you underneath the obsidian flesh of his enemy. He wonders if it's still you under it.
With a gutteral screech from the large mouth of the alien mass inhabiting your body, he takes his guitar from his back to pluck its strings. The noise could kill you, or it could liberate you. So he decides, and he plays.
The sound reverberates around the bridge, the creaking pauses for a moment, replaced by the ear piercing shrieks from the venoms. Hobie sees you crumble to your knees, tentacles of black slime ripped apart at the seams.
Your face is revealed under the mass, contorted into pain, the light in your eyes slowly fading as the creature feeds on your very being. Your nails dig into the slimy flesh, desperately trying to rip it out from your body. Eyes meeting with Hobie's, you nod for him to continue despite the blood spilling from your ears.
With bated breath, he strums again. More shrieking, more screaming, flesh torn apart, teeth chattering above the sound. His eyes never leave from your suffering as tears prick from his eyes. Grief snakes along his stomach up to his chest, pressing hard on his heart.
“Again!” You yell, ripping and gnawing at the agony filled venom. He follows, another strum, and another, one by one, venoms leave their hosts, and one by one, the bridge's wires collapse. But your own demon doesn't yield, it clings to you like a babe, holding onto you like a lifeline.
“C’mon!” Hobie stalks closer, plucking his strings over and over again despite your screams that would haunt his dreams. The venom wraps around you in its cold embrace, your own screams stifled with its arm over your mouth, choking you. “No!”
The bridge crumbles, someone tries to yank him away and take him to safety. But he shrugs them off, even if it means his own death.
“Hobie!” You manage to yell, “run!” It has you in a chokehold, dark veins ebbing from its touch towards your skin. It's killing you with it. Swallowing you in darkness, drowning you.
He abandons his guitar to dig you out of the mass. He rips out a chunk but it's immediately replaced and healed. Your muffled breaths can still be heard from under, he doesn't leave you. He won't leave you to die in the arms of the thing that took you from him.
Claws cutting and tearing, he heaves, breath stuck in his lungs. Yanking his helmet off, you see his face from the last pinprick of light. You wish there was a smile on his face instead of the desperation and fear. Still, you wished for home and you got it.
He pleads, and he calls for you, and his face is the last thing you saw before you fell into the suffocating depths.
The bridge collapses from under his feet, and he falls with you, holding onto you, plunging into the icy tides below. In the water, venom dissolves into nothingness, and he could finally hold you again as he joins you on the other side.
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jayladfanpage · 2 days
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what jason ships are you partial to? reasonings and silly musings would be fun to hear as well :) My personal fav is jaykyle !
To be entirely honest, there's very few Jason ships I outright dislike, those being Jaymia, Jaytim, Jaydick (no real reasoning behind this one, it just icks me), and Jaykara. Everything else I can at least partially get behind. My FAVORITES, though...
Jayde/Sladejay is a big one. I'm obsessed with Jason dating older men and I do see Jason, at least in his villain era, appreciating the fact that Slade respects his methods and his ideology. Slade himself has a lot of hard-set morals and a deep, obsessive love for his family despite causing them nothing but pain, which sounds like a certain Gotham vigilante I know. Also, we all know Slade likes them younger. (Even though that's really bad characterization, it's still funny, so whatever) and I do see them genuinely making each other "better" in that villain power couple way. They wouldn't make each other good people, but they could make each other happy and content and fix their emotional cravings together.
Another big one is JayKyle as well! They're just so toxic and messy I fucking adore them. The epitome of "If we hate each other enough this might work." Both of them need to get dicked down good in order to shut up and the other is more than willing to do it. Jason being completely isolated when he was a hero vs Kyle being introduced to so many heroes at once it's hard for him to forge genuine connections with most of them in the beginning. Both endlesly getting compared to their better, more loveable predecessor. I'm insane
... Jayroy. And I'm not sorry about it. Obviously if you’ve seen my ao3 you're aware of how much I just adore them but. ARGH THEY MAKE ME INSANE. Part of this is because RHaTO was my first DC comic and I'll always be at least a little emotionally attached to it, for all that it sucks ass. Also, I do thing that Roy "Savior Complex" Harper would obsess over the idea of fixing Jason -- especially since Lian had just died when they formed the Outlaws in my timeline. I also think Jason would help Roy with his rampant abandonment issues ( @royboyfanpage has some great posts about that if you're interested) due to how unwilling he is to let go of people, RHaTO characterization notwithstanding. And I just think Roy Harper is really fucking hot and Jason deserves a kind, stern dilf with long hair
You may notice that none of these answers include women and that's because Jason's kind of a dick to most women he interacts with. I am excited to see where JayRose goes though!
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futturmanspookie · 3 days
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˗ˏˋBreak୨୧
Summary: Josh is feeling a bit needy during work, so you take a break and go see him at the janitor's closet. Pairing: Josh Futturman X GN!Reader Tags: Smut, sex on inappropriate places, penetration, complimenting, unprotected sex, Josh whines a lot. Word Account: 1k
A/n: Hey guys! i know i've been a long time without posting and i'm so sorry for that, i also know its a pretty short fic, mainly for me, and im sorry for this too! I've been through some shit and i really hope you enjoy this! Love yall 🫶🫶
-Nic
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Your moans echo through the room. The insistent banging of the old product cabinet against the wall of the janitor's closet is getting more intense and a little louder.
How did you ended like this? Easy. It was Josh's fault. Like always.
The two of you have not had enough alone time this week. The last time you both even tried to make out, Gabe -Josh's father-, barged in saying it was taco Thursday.
Anyways, Josh needed your touch. So he did the most rational thing he could; Interrupt your job just so he could get a bit of attention.
"Hm... Babe." He said, stopping by your door and looking inside. He looked like a lost puppy in need of care. "Oh, sorry- No babe during work-" He mumbled.
"It's okay." You answered shrugging. He was acting a bit strange, that's for sure. It was clear he wanted something. "What do you need?" You ask softly, scanning his expression.
"Hm... I wanted you to... Go to the janitor's closet with me... There's something i really need to show you." He replied, and it sounded like a big excuse just to have you alone with him.
It's not like you're innocent anyway, so you agree to go with him. Even tho you already knew what was going to happen.
"So? What did you want to show me?" You ask, looking around at the peeling walls and old shelves that threaten to fall any moment.
Josh shrugs and smiles. Then he moves closer and seals your lips in a kiss. You wrap your arms around his neck and pull him closer, his hands instinctively gripping your hips and pushing your back against the nearest cabinet. He ran his tongue over your lower lip, parting them slowly and exploring your mouth with his tongue.
"We can get fired-" You whisper against his lips, your breath getting even heavier as your heart rate picked up.
"I don't care-" He replied, moving the kisses down your neck. He lets go of your hips, clumsily unbuckling his belt.
You sit up on the cabinet, not sure if it can support your weight. Josh carefully spreads your legs apart, kneads the soft flesh of your thighs over your jeans, then moves closer and kisses your lips softly.
"You're so pretty... I still can't believe you date me." He mumbled, smiling a bit and moving his kisses down your jaw and neck. You blushed and sighed, unbuttoning Josh's shirt slowly.
"I could say the same about you-" You whispered, kissing his lips softly and running your hand over his bare chest.
Josh was usually shy and insecure, but when he got horny, he started acting different. He gained a little more confidence and was able to say things without having to think of 12 better ways to say it. It excited you, more than you would ever admit.
Josh started kissing your neck, undoing your pants. "I've been thinking about you all day..." He whispered, it sounded a little desperate and whiny.
You bit down at your lower lip as Josh started pushing your pants down to your ankles. As soon as they were on the floor, he got between your legs and tugged his own pants and underwear down.
You looked down at his now exposed cock, the pink tip was leaking with precum and it was throbbing.
You blushed more and he slowly moved closer, pressing his tip against your entrance. "Can i?" He whispered in your ear.
You nodded quickly, anticipating him inside of you. He slowly pushed him, his hand tightening on your thigh. Josh sighed, his breath hot against your ear.
He started with slow thrusts, but they quickly got faster and deeper. Your hands held on Josh's back, your fingernails digging on it.
Josh's free hand found support on the wall, his whines getting needier with each thrust. "I love you-" He whimpered against your ear.
You instead of answering just buried your face in Josh's neck, trying to suppress your moans. The continuous pleasure and adrenaline left your mind hazy, you could swear this was your best fuck, ever.
Some items fall from the shelf above you, but it's not like either of you cared. Josh was so concentrated in how you felt around him, that he didn't cared to anything else, not even a bit. The world could explode and he would die happy.
He kissed your neck right above your ear, moaning lowly. "You're so pretty..." He whimpered, nuzzling against your skin.
His thrusts slowed down a bit, but he let out a long and loud whine as felt your walls clenching around his cock. You scratched on his back, moaning too.
"God- Babe... I'm close-" He whimpered, trying to keep it down. You nodded, humming lowly and clenching around him again.
His thrusts started to get unsteady and his whines started to get more breathless and hoarse. Your started to buck your hips forward, not being able to support the eagerness.
He thrusted deeply, biting your shoulder as spit his hot seed inside of you. Even after his orgasm, he kept fucking you.
Why? It was simple; He wanted you to cum. He wanted to feel you melting around him, trembling and crying out his name.
He moved his hand down and slowly started to stroke you, kissing your neck and shoulder.
"Cum for me... Please?" He asked, groaning softly as kept moving slowly.
Your breath was fast and shaky and you were moaning like a bitch. God, you loved Josh, you loved his face, his mouth, his dick, his hands... Everything on him. He was so hot and so good at pleasuring you, it's like you needed him.
Your moans got a bit louder scratching on his back again. He thrusted deeper, feeling you shudder and moan louder.
"Josh! Oh fuck!" You moaned, quickly feeling him covering your mouth with his hand as you finally released. It was the best orgasm of your life.
He pushed out slowly, kissing softly on your neck and smiling at you.
"Oh... What a mess we made..." He mumbled, smiling proudly as looked down at your legs.
"Shut up." You said, rolling your eyes.
"Sorry!" He replied, chuckling and pecking your lips.
You got up and started dressing, trying to make yourself presentable. You turned around and looked at your boyfriend, that had a big goofy smile and his pants down to his ankles.
"Don't forget zipping your pants." You said, pecking his lips and leaving.
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rockermybuddie · 3 days
Text
Misunderstanding
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Tommy x Evan “Buck”
A/n: i write a lot of Tommy and Buck. Imma write something different. Eventually.
Summary: Its Bucks off day and he decided he was going to bake some cookies and bring them to Tommy at work. When he arrives he spots Tommy talking to someone hes never seen before. Hes about to walk over to his boyfriend when the man kisses Tommy. Buck stops and turns around walking away before seeing or hearing Tommys reaction.
————
~Bucks POV~
I feel Tommys lips on mine as he gives me a goodbye kiss. “See you later.” He whispers. I hear the bedroom door click shut and drift back into sleeping.
When i woke up i made me some oatmeal and watched an episode of The Bachelor. When i was done i was bored. Eddie went down to Texas to vist with Christopher. I’m glad the two are making mends, i know it hurt Eddie when Chris left to live with his grandparents in Texas.
Maddie and Chim are taking a short trip to Long Beach. And Hen and Karin are dealing with the foster people to get Nia. So im out of options when it comes to hanging out with someone.
I decided im going to bake some cookies for Tommy and his station, so i get to work. I’m going to make a variety and an allergy free batch.
Once i finished i put the cookies in some boxes and loaded them into my jeep. I didnt text Tommy that i was coming because i want it to be a surprise.
When i arrived i parked my jeep and grabbed the boxes of cookies with a big smile on my face. I walked into the station and scanned the area looking for Tommy.
“Looking for Tommy?” Someone asks. “Yes.” I answer. Everyone here knows who i am. “Hes upstairs in the kitchen.” The person says. “Thanks.” I smile and make my way up the stairs.
When i get to the top i turn the corner and see Tommy talking to someone i’ve never seen before. Hes tall and skinny but well built, he has short curly blonde hair. I cant tell what color his eyes are but the way he is looking at Tommy is making me uneasy and hes standing really close to Tommy. Tommy is leaning against the counter just keeping conversation.
I was about to say his name when the guy leans forwards giving Tommy a kiss. That was all i needed to see even though thats not what i wanted to see. My heart instantly sank and i turned away and got out of there as fast as i could.
I threw the boxes of cookies in the trunk not caring if they spilled out and drove out of there as fast as I could.
I drove to my apartment because i obviously didnt want to go back to Tommys bouse where i’ve been staying at most of the time anyways.
When i walked in it was kind of cold but it didn’t bother me because i was flamming with anger. I cant believe Tommy kissed another guy. I tried not to cry but it was too hard to hold back. I really thought he was the one, that he wouldnt cheat on me. I guess i was wrong.
——-
~Tommys POV~
Everything was going fine at work, had a few easy calls. We got a new person his name is Kaleb Green, great young kid. Hes been doing really good.
We were in the kitchen just talking about why we wanted to become a firefighter and the craziest calls we have ever been on.
“So is your locker the one with the gay pride flag on it?” He asks me. “Yes?” I answer carefully. I dont think this kid is a homophobe or anything but im alway cautious when it comes to telling people. I have no shame in being a gay man but having such a masculine job some people may see me differently.
“Thats so cool. Another gay firefighter. I’ve never met another one. I dont feel so alone now.” He says. “Oh, well actually…” i was going to tell him about Evan but before i could finish my sentence he leaned forward and kissed me. I definitely was not expecting that.
“Dude! What the hell?!” I shout shoving him off of me. “Sorry. Too far?” He stupidly asks. “Yes way too far! Plus i have a boyfriend. He happens to be a firefighter too.” I snap. “Please dont report me. I really like it here” he begs. “Too late.” I tell him walking out of the kitchen.
I walk downstairs to report him when i see a familiar grey jeep leaving the parking lot pretty fast. I hope that wasnt Evan.
“Hey Kinard, what did Evan bring you?” Steven asks from a far. “Shit” i say under my breath that was Evan and he probably saw what happened in the kitchen because i never saw him.
I was about to ask if i could handle this when a call came through. I had to push down my anger and my worries about what just happened and focus on the call. God i hope its a simple call so it goes by fast.
It was not. It was a warehouse fire and the warehouse contained toxic chemicals so everything we did had to be done carefully and correctly. It took the rest of the shift.
We finally got back to the station at 11pm. I grabbed my bag and headed straight for my truck. “Hey Kinard.” I hear Kaleb call out behind me. “Dont talk to me. You most likely just ended my relationship with Evan and he was the best thing thats ever came into my life.” I snap at him. Which I probably said too much, based off his facial expressions, but i need to talk to Evan tell him what happened and pray that he believes me. “Let me talk to him, then i’ll ask for a new placement.” Kaleb says, “let me fix this.” He adds. “No you are not talking to him and yes find a new placement. Its not going to work for you here.” I tell him throwing my bag in the truck and drove home.
——
When i arrive home i dont see Evans jeep which means hes not here. I dont know why i thought he would be at my house after all. I mean yeah hes been staying here most of his time anyways but this would be the last place he would come after seeing another guy kiss me.
I try calling him and texting him but hes not answering, rightfully so. I drive over to his apartment next. I see his jeep parked in its usual spot so i know hes here.
I knock on his door immediately when i arrive. No response. “Evan its me. Please can we talk?” I ask through the door loud enough he should be able to here me. After a few more moments of knocking and asking nicely I threaten to do a welfare check and kick down his door.
I then heard the sound of locks unlocking and the door opened to a cold apartment and a tall Evan with a tear stained face and a angry blank expression.
“Evan please listen, i didnt kiss him. He kissed me.”i say, this is a lot more nerve racking than i thought. Its so hard not to stutter and to hse the right wording. “I saw you Tommy.” Evans voice cracks, he walks to the other end of the table while im at the other. Hes so close but het so far.
“Evan i would never cheat on you. Please believe me. We were talking and he asked if my locker was the one with the gay pride flag. Next thing i felt his lips on mine and i pushed him away. I swear.” I tell him the whole story but i cant tell if he believes me or not.
How do you convince your partner that you aren’t cheating on them when they saw another guy kiss you? I feel like im losing him and i really dont want to.
——-
~Bucks POV~
I listen to what Tommy is telling me and my brain is telling me not to believe him but my heart is telling me that hes telling the truth. Because Tommy is the first person to ever so me the type of personal affection, how it feels to be loved. Even though we haven’t said it yet we can feel it when we cuddle, when we get intimate, and when we say the same thing at the same time.
But in this case what do i go with my brain or my heart? Part of me wants to just believe him and go back to how things were but the other half wants to kick him out of my apartment and never talk to him again.
“Evan everyone in this situation had a misunderstanding.” Tommy says. “How am I misunderstanding this Tommy?” I ask in anger. “Okay, okah, im sorry. Wrong words here. Kaleb had a misunderstanding with what i said and he didnt let me finish talking before he kissed me. I was literally about to tell him about you when he kissed me.” Tommy explains.
“Thats what they all say.” I mumble under my breath. “Say what?” Tommy asks. “That the other person kissed them.” I answer. “Evan….” Tommy says, he can tell hes losing me.
It was quiet for a few moments as each of us trys to think of something. “I’ll come get my stuff tomorrow.” I say finally breaking the silence. “W-w-w-what?” Tommy stutters. “I said i’ll come get my stuff from your house tomorrow. While your at work so we dont see each other.” I repeat. Evans face goes into panic mode as he runs a frantic hand through his rough hair.
“Evan please. Im telling the truth. Listen Kaleb said he will talk to you. He’ll tell you everything i just said is true.” Tommy says all in one breath trying to convince me. “Please leave Tommy.” I ask. I’ve been hurt by too many people that are supposed to love me to try again and risk getting hurt again and again and again.
“Evan, baby please.” Tommy begs. “Stop. Get out Tommy. Get out before i call the police.” I command. Tommy rubs his chin with his hand as he turns to the door. He looks back at me one more time before he forces himself out the door.
Now im all alone, again. I should just stay single the rest of my life clearly everyone is going to hurt me when i get close to them.
——
The next day i wait intil i know Tommy is going to be at work so i can go get my clothes from over there.
When i arrive i dont see his truck which means he went to work today. I walk up to the door and i go to type in the code to unlock the door when the door opens. I look up and see the guy from yesterday. Kaleb.
I wanted to punch the guy so bad. He messed up the one good thing i had in my life. “Evan, right?” He asks. “So you’re Tommys new side piece huh?” I snarl. “Please let me explain myself. I never ment for any of this to happen. Can we just talk?” He asks stepping aside for me to come in. I roll my eyes and walk into the house.
I took a seat at the island in the kitchen as I listened to Kaleb talk. He basically said that it was his fault that he made the move and he ruined his chance at the firehouse. He said that he’s been transferred to a new one.
“So do you believe Tommy now? That he wouldn’t cheat on you?” Kaleb asks. “He was going to come tell you instantly but we got a call. You know how it is.” “Yeah.” Is all i say. “Well i have to get going. I really hope you can forgive Tommy. He really loves you.” Kaleb says as he lets himself out.
I sat at the kitchen island with my head in my hands thinking about what to do when i saw Tommy standing in the entrance of the kitchen leaning against the wall frame.
His body language was soft and his face was filled with regret. Hearing both sides of the story and that basically Tommy was telling the truth made it a little easier to go with my heart. But still knowing another guy kissed him hurts a little.
——
~Tomms POV~
I stood there and watched Evan as he proceeded what Kaleb told him. I can’t believe i caved and let Kaleb talk to Evan but its the only thing I could think of that could save mine and Evans relationship.
“So its true.” Evan finally says. “Yes.” I say. “A lot of people hurt me in the last Tommy.” He says. “I know. I never wanted to be one of them.” I try to control my voice to keep it steady.
“I know.” Evan says, “it still hurts that another guy kissed you.” He says. “It wont happen again. I swear to you Evan.” I promise him. “I know.” He says, a small smile spread across my face.
I walk towards him keeping an eye on his body language. “So do you forgive me?” I ask when im standing in front of him. I feel like im shaking as i wait for an answer. “Yes.” Evan tilts his head up and makes eye contact with me.
A smile spread my face as i lifted his chin up with my finger and connected my lips to his. God it felt so good to feel his lips against mine again. “What were you bringing me yesterday?” I ask out of curiosity. “Cookies. They are spilled in the back of my jeep.” He answers. “You taste better than cookies.” I say shrugging my shoulders. He smiles at that.
“I missed you so much.” I say against his lips resting my forehead against his. “I missed you too.” He says. I cradle the back of his head with my hand as i take his mouth back into mine.
I have him back and im never letting him go again.
——-
A/n: I hope you enjoyed the story!
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gayferrari · 22 hours
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we as a community need to get more rpf-y about the fact that charles' girlfriend's name is alex
I see your vision. However EYE am more interested in the fact that in a certain light she looks like she and Carlos could be related.
Long answer: this ask sent me down a bit of a thought spiral about how F1 fandom in general deals with IRL significant others, as opposed to other sports RPF fandoms I've lurked in, so you get an actual essay, sorry.
I think it's interesting how F1 fic writers tend to just ignore irl partners, way more than other sports fandoms. You know how the tag “AU: no girlfriend / no wives” gets A Lot of mileage elsewhere? In F1 it's hardly ever used, because wags are simply excluded by default. The only ships that sometimes remember partners exist (include them or deliberately write around them) are ships involving guys like Seb or Nico whose relationships are a big part of their lives and are probably harder to just push to the side.
By contrast, the younger crop of drivers have a big social media presence that's almost impossible to ignore BUT does not include their actual irl partners because it's all work mandated PR, so these men's F1 personas make it very easy to paint them as single. Even if their broader public personas (outside of F1) are very high profile and often includes very public relationships and friendships — it's not like they keep their relationships lowkey, you know? But people just choose not to dig into those layers of lore, probably simply because the stuff we get through team PR videos and grill the grid already gives us a lot to work with.
IDK, I just find it fascinating! I bet many people don't even notice, but TO ME it's kinda glaring how often everyone in fic is single because imo it's such a fundamental component of the elite athlete lifestyle how these guys always have someone to come home to (and do some emotional labour for them). It doesn't have to be their actual irl girlfriends — many people draw the RPF line at including semi-famous partners, and that's a totally understandable stance — but there aren't even that many OC girlfriends. It is something that stands out to me compared to, idk, hockey RPF to make the most obvious comparison.
HAVING SAID ALL THAT. Yeah, I'd actually be very interested in more fics where Charles has a girlfriend. Again, it doesn't have to be a fictional version of his actual rl girlfriend, it can just be an OC with a different name. BUT, Charles's whole serial monogamy thing is actually a really big part of his personality that I think fandom misses out on, because HE is the one who's assigned the role of girlfriend in most ships he's involved in. You know, the omegafication of Charles... I get why it's a popular trend, I've written it myself and enjoy reading it. But I think there are interesting things to be done, characterisation wise, drawing on the fact that irl he's very much A Dude, and also a serious relationship kinda guy, and a very basic kinda straight guy who yearns for three children by age 35. Like... I think taking THAT kind of man and giving him a sexuality crisis is an avenue full of potential that the fandom could explore more.
tldr: I fully respect people's decision NOT to engage with significant others in RPF but also I think it has potential if you're inclined to go that way! so yea I agree RPF fandom could and should do more with Charles having a girlfriend even if people choose not to RPF *this* specific girlfriend.
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codybees · 1 day
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Larvis headcanon: Larry walks in on Travis writing a literal fanfic of himself and Larry and Travis is all like: "ITS NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE" while blushing like crazy and Larry's like "WANNA ACT IT OUT" and Travis would reply "REALLY?!" Larry would answer "YEAH" and then they'd act out whatever Travis fanfic of himself and Larry (sorry for long ask and for it being so dumb lol)
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he’s . so dumb
but also canonically Larry is INCREDIBLY nosy so I dont doubt for a second he’d wanna know what’s in that damn journal full of Travis’s inappropriate thoughts abt him
“i didnt know you were into this stuff 😳” and Travis just. really wants to kill him
but he’s really good at writing. and larry genuinely likes reading whatever he puts down on paper even if its just about something small. he always has a lot going on in his head and its interesting to see how travis thinks when he actually writes stuff down
most of the time its hard to though. he doesnt think like everyone else
(autism)
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seaoflove07 · 3 days
Text
Love Planted a Rose 🌹
~ Dark ~
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• Artwork by The Drawables •
Full Art Cover and Story Description, Here.
OCXCanon. 🔪 Azusa & Christine’s Story. 🌹
Fan Fiction Written by Me.
Fandom: Diabolik Lovers.
Masterpost.
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Christine was sitting in the bathtub with her arms wrapped around her legs. She was lost in her thoughts thinking of what happened last night with Azusa. All the things he told her. To him, pain makes him feel wanted and needed. What has this world done to him? To make him think this way. It's sad. Her mind is telling her to stay away from him, but she can't understand why her heart is aching for him. She wants to get to know him, to understand him. Even though she's very aware that's gonna cost her lots of pain. She wants to know his past, and she also wants to know how long has he been living in this world. So many questions she would love to ask him. But she knows he won't answer to any. She already tried, but he made it clear that his past doesn’t concern her. Yet he wants to know everything about her.
She touches her lips, Thinking about the way he kissed her with so much desperation.
Christine: (I haven’t kissed another man since Mark. I didn't think I would ever need that kiss, but I did, desperately like Azusa. His lips, his tongue, and his rough touches. They all felt good, even though my head was spinning and I struggled to catch up to him since I was very lightheaded. The way he got anxious when he thought I had a boyfriend back home. I'm starting to feel these butterflies in my stomach again. Why am I feeling this way? I can't let him get into my heart, I just can't. A human broke my heart to pieces, I can't imagine how much worse it will be with a vampire. It's already madness right now. Azusa is very scary at times, he almost killed me. All the physical pain Azusa has caused me and I haven’t been here long. I can’t imagine how it would be for the rest of the summer. My lips are swollen from that kiss, not just my lips, but my whole body hurts and I have so many bite marks and cuts from his knife...)
*Knock, Knock*
Azusa: “Rose-san… I'm coming in…”
Christine: “Azusa! I'm still in the bathtub, please get out.”
Azusa: “There’s so many bubbles in the bathtub… I can't see your body… So don't worry…”
Christine: “… Do you need something?”
Azusa: “Ruki told me... to give you… this medicine… he said… it will help you… feel better… here… I also brought you… water…”
- She drinks the medication -
Christine: “Thank you.”
Azusa: … …
Christine: “What's the matter?”
Azusa: “I can't stop… thinking about you… even when… I’m with my brothers… or when I'm alone… or cutting myself... or polishing my knives… and when I’m talking to Justin… your pretty face… always comes to my mind…”
Christine: !!!
(I can feel my cheeks flushed...)
“I-I have been thinking about you a lot too. I want to get to know you, Azusa.”
Azusa: “Eh…!? Really, Rose…?”
He moves closer to her and sits at the edge of the bathtub, neither say anything. Azusa caresses her cheek and stares deeply at her brown eyes.
Ruki: “Hmph, Azusa. I told you to only give her the medication and to come back quickly. Stop touching her and take your leave. You're already running late on the task that I asked you to do earlier.”
Azusa: “I’m sorry… I’ll go right now… I'll see you later… Rose…”
He gave her a cute smile and leaves the bathroom.
Ruki: “Livestock, hurry up with your bath and meet me at the library. I would like to discuss something with you.”
Christine: “Okay, I'll be out in a minute.”
*TimeSkip*
- At the Library -
Christine: “I'm here, Ruki.”
Ruki: “Good, you didn’t make me wait long. Take a seat.”
… …
“Livestock, you are going to be living in this manor all summer and I expect honesty. Tell me what you really are? And you better not lie to me.”
Christine: (His question took me by surprise…)
“What do you mean?”
He slams his fist on the table.
Ruki: “Dammit, Livestock. Don't play dumb with me! I had my familiar follow you. He said when you were at our swimming pool there was a blonde woman with a white dress inside the pool near you but disappeared quickly. Were you doing black magic? Are you a witch?”
Christine: !!
(So I'm not crazy and I didn't imagine it! I did see a reflection of myself under the pool…)
“I’m not lying and I'm not a witch! But I did see myself inside the pool last night and it scared me. When I started to scream underwater, Azusa got me out of the pool. I asked him if he saw anyone inside the pool but he said no. This has never happened to me before.”
Ruki: “I see. Thinking about it a Witch wouldn't have a similar blood scent to Eve. Did the figure say anything to you?”
Christine: “Yes… She said, “Soon, you will be me.”
“I-I don't understand the meaning of this. She did look exactly like me but when she gave me a sinister look it seemed inhuman.”
(Chills run down her spine just thinking about it…)
Ruki: “Whatever that thing was is probably your true form. Are you sure you don't know what that form is? Does your family have a history of mystical creatures?”
Christine: “What!? Of course not. We are all just humans and I don't possess any strength or magical powers. Ruki, please if you know anything about why I was sent here please tell me.”
Ruki: “That's information I want to know as well. None of us know why you were truly sent here, not even the Sakamakis. Your blood sent is similar to Eve's but I don't think this is about another sacrificial bride. You are valuable to that man. He has made it clear in reminder letters that he will kill anyone if they kill you, and this pool incident it's not a coincidence. I will still try my investigation to see what he really wants with you. If you experience another similar situation like this again I need you to tell me immediately, I am clear, Livestock?”
Christine: “What's the point in telling you if you are gonna have your familiars follow me anyways?”
Ruki: “Dammit, Livestock! You sure don't know how to shut your mouth and agree nicely like a good girl.”
Christine: “Because I am not a girl, I’m a woman!”
Ruki stands up and grabs her wrists pulling her up.
Ruki: “A woman you say? So you don't mind me being this close to you.”
He smirks.
Christine: “What the hell are you doing? Let go of me.”
Ruki: “Living in this manor, I don't care if it's temporary. You still are gonna follow my rules and I expect you to agree nicely with respect. I shall have no mercy next time you run your mouth. Understood?”
Christine: “Yes.”
(I'm trying to control my anger right now. I truly want to tell him to Fuck off!…)
Ruki: “Good, There is something else I want to ask you.”
He removes his hands from her wrists and steps back a bit.
“Are you seducing my younger brother?”
Christine: “Of course not! He's only after my blood and nothing else.”
Ruki: “Not true. You have him hypnotized. He’s never acted this way for a Livestock before. Have you hit and harmed him?”
Christine: “Not because I want to. Most of the time, he forces me to hurt him, and on some occasions I have, but it was for self-defense.”
Ruki: “Ha… I see. What are your thoughts on him?”
Christine: “I have mixed feelings for him… Sometimes, I'm afraid of him, wondering what he will do next. But other times, I kinda like his company. He does hurt me a lot but on some occasions, he's very sweet to me. I don't understand his full logic when it comes to pain. But to be honest, I want to get to know him and maybe become friends with him.”
Ruki: “Friends? Livestock, you really are foolish. Azusa won't settle for only friendship.”
Christine: “What do you mean?…”
Ruki: “Why don't you use that brain of yours? You truly are an airhead.”
Christine: … …
Ruki: I do find it interesting how obsessed Azusa is with you. Your blood probably is tasty to him but... There’s something more, I can feel it in your Aura. Azusa has been through a lot over the years and I worry to see my brother break because of you.”
Christine: ... ...
“Ruki... can you please tell me about Azusa’s past? I truly don’t want to hurt him. I want to get to know him and to help him. But for me to be able to help him I need to understand him. Please Ruki! Can you please tell me what caused him to self-harm?”
Ruki: “Why don’t you ask him this question yourself?”
Christine: “I did, but he told me it doesn't concern me. I just want to understand why he acts like this.”
Ruki: “Haah... Fine. I will tell you just this once. Azusa has never opened up too much about himself to us either. Even I have never fully understood how his brain works. From what I know, it has something to do with those kids from his childhood. Their names are Justin, Christina, and Melissa.”
Christine: (The names of his scars!…)
“He introduced his scars to me and they had those names.”
He nods.
Ruki: “He believes those three are his friends and will not let anyone treat his wounds so they do not disappear. From what he told us, those kids used to beat him up for fun daily until he started enjoying it and thought he was being useful to them. They then left him alone, thinking he was some kind of a weird kid. Those kids, later on, got killed because they were caught shoplifting. Seeing them dead traumatized him.”
Christine: “B-But Where were your parents? And he’s your younger brother, why did you guys allow this to happen? Why you guys didn’t help him? While he was getting bullied.”
Ruki: “Azusa since childhood he was wandering around in the streets. His parents abandoned him. We are not blood brothers. After the death of Justin, Christina, and Melissa. Azusa was sent to the orphanage and that’s where we all met. Kou and Yuma too. Ever since then, we became brothers.”
... ...
“That will be all the information that I will tell you. You are even lucky that I even told you this much.”
Christine: (My heart hurts for Azusa and for the brothers. Even though Ruki didn't mention the full story, by them meeting each other at the orphanage they all probably had a bad childhood...)
“I appreciate you telling me this. I won't bother you anymore. I'll be taking my leave now and will start my shift.”
Ruki: “Wait, Livestock. I am not done talking to you. Tomorrow, Kou will be the one to accompany you to the Sakamakis. I have other matters to take care of. Don’t be dumb and behave around the brothers and try not to get yourself killed this time.”
Christine: “Okay… I will watch my back.”
Ruki: “That will be all, you may take your leave and start your shift.”
*TimeSkip*
After Christine completed her work shift she took another bath and finished brushing her long blonde hair, lastly, she sprayed herself with her favorite perfume, Coco Mademoiselle by Chanel. She loves the perfume so much that she wears it all the time even before bedtime. She couldn’t stop thinking about Azusa. She feels so sad for him and her chest keeps hurting every time she thinks about what Ruki told her. Azusa truly must have felt so lonely to the point he wanted to be useful to his bullies who were beating him up all the time. Now she understands why he asks her to give him pain. Christine felt tears running down her cheeks. The fact that he also was abandoned in the streets by his parents. How cruel and sad! He must have been scared, cold, and hungry. More tears keep coming out of Christine’s eyes. She grabbed a tissue to clean her face and tried to calm down. She needed to occupy her mind so she decided to read her favorite novel Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austin. Christine has lost count of the number of times she has read this story. She needed to distract herself and take Azusa off her mind. She went to grab the book and flinched when she heard a knock on her door.
Christine: “Who is it?”
… …
(Whoever it is they are not responding…)
She moved closer and hesitated to open the door.
“Is someone there?”
(She can hear someone chatter through the door…)
- She opens the door -
Christine: “Azusa! Did something happen?”
(He's shaking and sweating. He looks really sad…)
She cupped his cheeks.
Azusa: “Rose-san… can I sleep in your bed… I don't want to be alone… right now…”
She nods.
Christine: “Come in… Can I get you water? I can go grab it really quick in the kitchen.”
Azusa: “No… just lay down next to me… please... don’t leave me... alone...”
Christine: (He looks so anxious! I’m so worried about him right now…)
She takes his hand and leads him to her bed.
“Lay down, Azusa… I promise I'll stay by your side.”
- They both lay down on the bed, staring at each other -
Christine: “What happened…?”
Azusa: … …
“I had a nightmare… and when I woke up… I needed to see you…”
Christine: “What was the nightmare about?”
Azusa: … …
“I already forgot…”
Christine: “What!? How is that possible?”
Azusa: “I already said… I have forgotten about it… so you don't need to worry…”
Christine: … …
(He has tears in his eyes, she knows he's lying…)
“Azusa… I won’t force you to tell me. But… I want to let you know… that I'll listen to you if you ever want to talk about anything that's on your mind. I'll be here for you. You're not alone…”
- She cups his cheek -
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• Artwork by @yuma-mukami-garden-god •
Azusa: !!
“Rose…”
(Her beautiful smile and gentle touch warms my heart. Her hand is so soft, like rose petals from the garden....)
“I’m feeling calmer now… that I'm here with you…”
- He places his hand on top of hers and smells her wrist -
“Your flowery scent… is also calming to me… I’m glad… you came into my life… Rose…”
Christine: “Really?”
He nods.
Azusa: “Can I … suck your blood…? I’m thirsty… from all the sweating…”
Christine: (If my blood will calm him and make him feel better than he can have it…)
“Yes, Azusa… Go ahead.”
She closes her eyes, waiting for the strike of pain.
Azusa: “Look at me…”
He sinks his fangs into her wrist.
*Slurp*
Christine: “Azu…”
Azusa: “Ah… so sweet… and… I love that look… on your face… I'll bite you more…”
*Gulp*
Christine: “Azu… doesn't my perfume bother you? I feel like the taste of a perfume won't be pleasing.”
- He licks the bite mark -
Azusa: “It tastes delicious… your floral scent… mixed with the scent of your blood… is heavenly addicting…”
He planted a kiss on her wrist.
Azusa: “I like that you are calling me… “Azu…” hehe… Keep calling me that, okay…? Now let me hold you tight…”
- He embraced her -
“The warmth of your body… feels nice… it takes all my worries away….”
Christine: (I can feel both our hearts pounding with his tight embrace…)
“I’m glad you feel that way Azu. I hope you have a sweet dream this time.”
Azusa: … Zzz… Zzz…
Christine: (He fell asleep immediately. Azusa’s temperature is so cold but I don't dislike it. His scent is nice too. His scent is a mix of fruity black tea with hints of florals. I should move and give us space but the truth is… I want to be locked in his arms, it feels nice. His expression looks peaceful now. I truly hope he has a better dream this time…)
She runs her fingers through his dark greenish hair.
(If Helping him by doing these things for him, I hope he can trust me one day and open up to me…)
Christine: “I hope… you let me cure your scars, Azusa.”
She buries her face on his chest and closes her eyes.
- TO BE CONTINUED -
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• Artwork by MonMonArtz •
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ghost-proofbaby · 1 year
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asking about so mordor it is during 24/7 hype is like asking the teacher if there’s hw at the end of class HAHA
nooooo never!!! mordor is my baby
i will be honest — i’ve been avoiding asks about it due to a few unkind ones i’ve gotten recently where people haven’t been the… nicest in the way they expressed wanting an update (but most of you are lovely who ask!! even simple “hey how’s mordor going” is welcome <3). i just haven’t known how to respond i guess.
the short answer is: it’s going! i wish i could give a more definitive answer regarding the next update because i love writing that fic very dearly, but i’ve just worked the last few days and haven’t gotten the chance to sit down and finish the final scene for the next chapter. 😭
the longer answer, which it’s not specifically you that has mentioned this nonnie, but others, is that my process with mordor just takes longer than 24. it’s more involved. when i say i’m working on mordor, it means i am rewatching the show, i am meticulously researching, i am rereading shire and going over my plot specifically for mordor. it’s just a lot more brain power required, which i fully brought upon myself and don’t mind because like i said, i love this fic and getting to write it and share it with you all!! it just means there’s a lot more happening behind the scenes with it on my end. i know it may not seem that way to all of you (as some people have expressed), and i know that maybe some don’t find the writing reflecting all that effort/being up to par, but at the end of the day… i’m trying my best and i’m most worried with my enjoyment. if i’m not enjoying it anymore, then it’ll show in the writing, and that just… isn’t what i want for my fic, y’know?
i really am sorry that updates on mordor take longer, and i am so endlessly appreciative to those of you who are patient enough to wait it out and still show so much support <3 i love y’all. thank you for taking a story that has turned into a very vulnerable part of my heart, and for treating it with care. 🖤
also i’m so sorry for picking on you specifically nonnie you’re just one of the nicer asks i’ve received recently regarding it and i’d rather extend an answer to you then someone being rude!!! <3 thank you for reading and thank you for being excited about it haha ily <3
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