#sorry this got so long i....couldnt figure out where i wanted to go with it

[runnning-outof-time]

John & "Listen to yourself.”

Angst to fluff!

Thanks for sending this in, anon! I’m sorry it took me a bit to get to write it! I hope it’s along the lines of what you were thinking of! Also just try to imagine it’s (Y/N) instead of Esme in the gif - I felt that it fit the scene and couldnt help but use it! Enjoy! :)

I’D LOVE TO KNOW WHAT YOU THINK! - YOUR COMMENTS & REBLOGS HELP ME WRITE!

Part of my 3.5k Celebration - find more stories here!

But I Got Your Mind Off of It

John Shelby x Reader

Warnings: language, mention of a weapon

Word Count: 1111

Summary: John manages to talk (Y/N) off the ledge before she blows up the longest relationship she has over something so silly…which happens to be something she’s also done before.

The sound of the bang that the door closing made was even loud enough to make John Shelby jump. He scrambled from the table he was sitting at to get over to the concealed hole in the wall where a revolver was nestled. He was just about to access it when he noticed who had slammed the door.

“The fuck was that for, (Y/N)?” he asked his wife, his brows furrowing together in confusion.

(Y/N) didn’t hear him though. She was too busy pacing the floor while muttering unintelligible things. Something about someone being stupid and never wanting to see them again. John wracked his brain for a moment, trying to figure out if it was something that he’d done.

He decided to finally approach her when he came up empty. “What’s goin’ on with you, love?” he asked her, hoping that his voice was level enough so that she wouldn’t get set off…even more than she all already had been.

“I just can’t believe she did that to me,” she finally spoke clear enough for John to hear what she was saying.

“Who did what?” John still didn’t quite understand what was going on.

“Mary,” (Y/N) snapped, as if she was annoyed that John hadn’t come into the conversation with all of the details.

But that didn’t stop John from asking more questions. “What did Mary do?” was his next one.

“She stood me up. We had an entire evening planned and then she cancelled last minute!” she didn’t hesitate in sharing her frustrations, aggravation starkly present in her words.

John furrowed his eyebrows as he took a moment to figure out which way he should approach the situation. (Y/N) was not one to be messed with when she was hot about something, and he hadn’t seen her this worked up in a long time. But before he was able to do anything however, (Y/N) was turning to leave the shop.

“That’s it!” she proclaimed as she made for the door, “I’m going to give her a piece of my mind!” She then started angrily walking towards the door. Just as her left hand reached for the knob, her right was pulled backwards. She gasped as she was spun and within seconds, her back was pressed against the brick wall. Her eyes widened as she looked at her husband, who now had her pinned so that she couldn’t leave.

“You’re not going anywhere…not like this, at least,” he told her, speaking in a calm voice because he knew that if he raised it, all hell would break loose.

“Let me go, John,” she huffed, trying, and failing, to break from his grasp.

“Why did she cancel?” he asked, not giving into her wishes.

Lucky for him, (Y/N) was all for giving the details now. “She ditched me to spend time with her new man. We had this night planned for weeks just to have her call me earlier today saying that he’s asked her out for dinner. She’s ditching me for dinner!” She was fuming by the end of her explanation, all of her anger washing back in again. Who ditches their best friend of over 10 years to have dinner with a guy?? The thought of it was absurd!

John searched her eyes for a moment, waiting to see if she had anything else to add. When she stayed silent, he couldn’t help but break into stiffled laughter. This made (Y/N)’s brows furrow. “What the fuck are you laughing about, John?!” she asked incredulously, not sure if she was now more upset with her friend or her husband.

“Listen to yourself, (Y/N),” he began, surpressing his laughter so that a more serious air would fall over the conversation once more.

“What?” she snapped back at him.

“What Mary’s doing…” he started, shaking his head slightly as he snorted to himself, “you did the exact same thing to her when you started seeing me.”

“I did not!” she immediately proclaimed, shocked that he wasn’t taking her side on this matter.

“You absolutely did,” he stood firm with his point.

“Yeah? When?”

“One of the first dates I took you on. I brought you out for dinner, and you told me that you felt so bad for having to cancel your plans with your best friend.”

“Yeah, but…but I felt bad about it,” (Y/N) was quick to point out.

“You don’t think Mary feels bad about it?” John asked with raised eyebrows.

“At least I didn’t cancel the day of!” she pointed out another - what she at least thought was a - flaw in John’s argument.

“Well maybe unlike your amazingly considerate then-boyfriend, now-husband, her boyfriend doesn’t have the same regards to the possibility that Mary had other plans.”

“You’re so full of yourself, John,” (Y/N) snorted as a smile broke passed the deep frown she was wearing.

“Just stating the facts, love,” he winked at her, making her roll her eyes in response. “But I got your mind off of it, didn’t I?” he questioned then.

(Y/N) pursed her lips as she realized what he’d done. Then she silently cursed him and his ability to make her mood change on a dime. She waited a few moments before she, begrudgingly, replied: “you did.”

“Good. Mission accomplished,” he grinned, finally letting go of her hands so that he could settle both of his under her jaw. “Now what I’m hearing from you is…” he paused, licking his lips as his grin grew bigger, “that you’ve got the night free.”

(Y/N) rolled her eyes again, trying so hard to keep up the act that she was angry. But it was so damn hard with him looking at her the way he was. “My night is free now,” she finally answered him.

“Which means you’re able to spend it with me?” he checked.

“You don’t have any duties to carry out at the Garrison?” she responded with a question of her own.

“None that are as important as me wife,” he grinned.

“You can be so cheesy sometimes.”

“But I got your mind off of what you were mad about, didn’t I?”

“Just take me out on the town…before I go and change my mind,” she dismissed his question, though the look on her face told him immediately that he was absolutely right.

“You don’t need to ask me twice,” he grinned before he leaned in and pressed his lips to hers. “Let’s go,” he said after pulling away, reaching down to take her hand in his and lead her out of the betting shop.

**tagging in a reblog so the notification gets sent out!

MASTERLIST

[loubouskz]

could you do a chan ff where y/n asks him to read a couple chapters of the book they’re reading but the reader asks bc the book has smut in it and then chan reads it and gets all 😉

reading can be fun

bang chan x reader

description: reader gets turned on by chan's reading and they have a lil fun haha

warning: cute nicknames(like baby and sweets, I used 'my girl' once, couldnt figure out a different name to put, other than that its pretty neutral), SMUT!, reading smut, the smallest bit of thigh riding, some foreplay, dirty talk, unprotected sex, creampie, chan may have a slight breeding kink but it's not mentioned, reader loves chan's dick...I think that's all, let me know if I missed anything.

wc: 2.0k(not proof-read)

a/n: ofc I can and thank you for requesting!! I had some much fun writing this! and I'm sorry this took so long to post. my laptop is finally kicking the bucket so I have to type everything on my phone(on the days where I can't get my computer to work.)so it's taking a bit longer than I like but i hope you enjoy this and I did your request justice!🥰

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after a long day of catching up with doing chores around my apartment, I finally had time to myself. to sit down and read the book my friend lent me. they said it was really good and that I should try to read something that wasn't my usual genre that I love. they basically begged me…for two weeks straight before I finally agreed to read it. I made a cup of tea and sat down on the couch with the book in hand. I brought my legs up to sit somewhat under my butt and got comfy. grabbing the throw blanket from the top of the couch and laying it across my lower body. I took a sip of my tea before opening the book.

i was on the eighth chapter when I heard chan enter my apartment with the key I had given him. I heard him take off his shoes and jacket before entering the living room. I turned my head and met eyes with the person I loved most. his dimpled smile brightened up when he saw me.

"hey baby!" chan said, as he made his way to me. "hi!" I said back, tilting my head up to follow his eyes. chan kissed the top of my head and maneuvered his way to sit next to me. "how was your day?" he asked, grabbing my legs and laying them across his lap. "a bit long, but that was because of the chores I had to do around my apartment. now I'm relaxing, what about you, channie?" I said. "ahh, tiring but worth it- like always. changbin, jisung and I are working on a new track and it's coming along nicely." chan said, absent mindlessly caressing my legs. 

"but I'm also happy I got the rest of the day off and get to spend some time with you." he said, leaning over and giving me a kiss. I smiled into it, making him giggle. "so, what are we reading?" he asked, snuggling closer to me. I told him the name of the book, "it's the book my friend has been wanting me to read for a hot minute now." I said, showing him the cover of the book. "nice! what is it about?" he asked. "it's a fantasy/sci-fi romance novel set in space. it's about this girl falling in love with a crew member from another ship that they've been on a race with- without knowing whom…" I told him what the book was about and caught him up to the part I was at.

"wow, i might have to read it after you, it sounds really good." chan said. "you wanna read a few chapters to me?" i asked shyly. "sure." he said with a big smile on my face. i handed over the book to chan. knowing what was coming up next in one of the chapters my friend had told me about. "are you sure?" I aksed before getting comfy, to which he nodded too. once we were both comfy, he began to read where I had stopped.

we were now on chapter 10, and the two main characters were sitting next to a window and talking about what they were.

he looked back out the window. minutes passed, and he still hasn't said a word. she sighed and stood up. "this was stupid. to think, for once, you would talk to me about what's going on inside your head. but no." she said. as she turned her back to him, he finally said something.

"what is this lee?" she said. he tilted his head. "what do you mean?" he asked. "I mean like all the nights we've spent up here. you listening to all the thoughts in my head and answering them aloud. even when i think you can't hear them. the long talks and banters. all the secret glances. what is this? what is this to you?" she said as the words fumbled out. her heart racing, like it was going to explode. 

"if you want me to say I feel the same way about you, just know I do, but nothing more can come from this." he said, almost too quietly for her to hear. she could feel the tears start to build up. "and why is that lee?" she asked, not turning around. "because you have to leave. you have to stay with your brother. you can't be with me." he, again, said quietly. she turned around and walked up to him. 'look at me' she said in her head. "stop it. just go back to your room." he said. 'please look at me. I wanna love you.' she said. lee hissed in a breath of air. "we can't." he answered again.

'then love me for one night. this night. my last and only night with you.' he snapped his head to her, with an unfamiliar look in his eyes. he looked at her for a couple of seconds before making up his mind. he shot up from his seat and placed his lips onto hers. quickly…."

"okay! I think that's enough for tonight, channie." I said, grabbing the book out of his hand and closing it. i felt my cheeks starting to heat up. "what no, let's continue!" he said. I pretended to yawn and placed the book down on the table. "let's go eat something and go to bed channie." I said, flipping the blanket off and hopping off the couch. I made my way into the kitchen, opening up the fridge.

I heard chan's footsteps making their way to me. I called out to see if he wanted one of two options I offered to make, but he didn't answer.

"he shot up from his seat and placed his lips onto hers. quickly grabbing hold of her waist tightly, like she would slip away if he didn’t, making her moan into the heated kiss. her hands threaded his hair, pulling at it slightly.

"fuck." he whispered out, breaking the kiss. she started kissing down his jaw, finding his sweet spot. though they were in a hidden spot. lee didn't want to be caught. he grabbed her hand and pulled her to his room. once in the safety behind the closed door. he pushed her against it, one of his legs slotting between her legs. right where she wanted him most."

chan stopped reading aloud after that. i peeked my head up from the fridge and saw his eyes scanning the page. hearing him say that part of the story out loud, made my knees go weak. the way he was saying the words creating an uncomfortable wetness between my thighs. chan's eyes left the book and made their way to me.

"you want me to continue?" he asked with a slight smirk on his face. I shook my head no and closed the fridge door. I need to calm down. I tried to walk out of the kitchen and pass chan. he quickly dropped the book on the counter and grabbed my hips. "where are you running off to baby?" chan asked, pressing me against the counter. "no where." I said confidently. he chuckled at my answer. "really? because I think my girl was starting to get all hot, flustered, and bothered from the book i was reading out loud to her before i even got to the good part." chan said as he leaned in.

"am I right, baby?" he asked in a lower octave. I whimpered out as I felt him push my legs apart with his. one of his hands slowly made their way into my sweats and past my underwear. "answer me sweets." chan said, cupping my sex. he and I both knew the answer, but he wouldn't continue if I didn't say the word. "yes." I said quietly. he hummed at my answer, slowly pushing two of his fingers past my folds and curling them up inside. my eyes fluttered closed at the feeling, moaning lightly.

chan groaned, "god, you're so wet baby." I held onto his arm that was in my sweats as he quickened the pace. chan started leaving open mouth kisses on my neck, sucking sweetly on the spot that made me clench around his fingers. "channie, please." I said as I started to ride his fingers. "what do you need baby?" chan whispered in my ear, nibbling on my lobe. "I want more." I said. I grabbed him through his pants and felt how hard he was. chan removed his fingers, quickly tasting them before grabbing me behind my thighs. lifting me up and walking back over to the couch.

"oh fuck. don't talk like that y/n." chan said, grabbing my hands and holding them above my head. one hand on my wrists and the other guiding his dick into my cunt. slowly filling me inch by inch, I closed my eyes at the feeling. 

he laid me down, caging me in. clothes coming off fast, feeling up each other. chan grabbed his wallet as I stroked his dick. "fuck baby, I don't have a condom on me." he said, throwing his wallet onto the coffee table. "I wouldn't be the first time fucking me raw." I said, squeezing him. chan shuddered at my words and action. "you still want to?" he asked, fucking into my hand. "of course, why wouldn't i want your thick cock inside me, filling me up so nicely." I said, spreading my legs a little more for some more room.

"oh chris!" I moaned out, throwing my head back as he bottomed out. he groaned, letting go of my hands to place both of his on my hips. dragging out till only his tip was in, then slamming right back in. "shit, I love how this little cunt takes me all in." chan said, as he kept his slow but rough thrusts. taking his time to bring each other to our highs. with every thrust, hitting the gummy part inside me so perfectly every time. "faster please." I said, sweeping my hands up his arms to around his neck. 

"wanna cum baby?" he said, circling his arms under my body to completely hold me. his sweaty red chest presses against mine tightly. he rolled his hips, hitting my cilt with every stroke. I choked out a moan, angling my hips to get better friction. "yes, make me cum. please make me cum channie." I whined out, pulling at his now wet locks. as chan quicken his sloppy thrusts, he pushed his head into my neck. chan started moaning louder and louder, making me clench around him even harder. "oh fuck!" I moaned out. "yeah, cum for me baby. cum all over my cock." chan said, lifting his head, pressing his forehead to mine. "let me see how good I fuck you." he said with broken moans in-between.

the eye contact, the feeling of his body pressed to mine, and god-sent thrusts bringing me closer till finally the knot broke inside. dragging my nails down his back as I came. chan didn't let up with his thrusts prolonging my orgasm while chasing after his. which came with a couple of thrusts later. chan moaned loudly, pressing his hips as far as he could. cumming deep inside me. "oh fuck!" chan cried out, still lightly pumping with shallow thrusts. "take all my cum baby. take it, it's all for you." chan said, pushing once more before fully stopping. laying his head on my chest.

"I love you chan." I whispered into his hair. he pushed himself up and gave me a dazed smile. "I love you more." he said, pecking my lips gently. he fully say up and slowly pulled out. "going need to wash your blanket." chan laughed out, with his ears turning red. "what?" I said lifting up my body. "we made a mess baby." he said, rubbing the back of his neck. ohh. "well, let's get cleaned up." I said, careful getting up. I held out my hand as chan could grab it as we made our way to the bathroom.

chan relaxed into my arms. he dragged out his arms and stroked my thighs as we both calmed down from our racing breaths.

"I can't believe that book really turned you on." chan said. "and what about you? you had a complete hard-on and you had barely touch had you hands on me at first." I said, laughing. chan blushed as he pushed me into the bathroom. "shut up." he mumbled.

[icameheretoreadstuff]

Do you take requests? Because I have a request. This is my first time but k love your stories. Okay what if reader is 23 and she is the secret Blossom daughter anyways she is also dating FP and she gets super jealous of Alice (who I’m sorry don’t like) anyways what if she gets down and sees maybe FP would do better without her but he changes her mind? With some smut?!! Hehehe ahh I’m so excited

Hii, aww thank yooou 🥳 How exciting, this is my first request! it took some time writing this, im so sorry about that but here it is 🙈 oh and bytheway hahah, I got a little carried away so its kinda long 🙈

The Blossom Secret Pairing: FP Jones x F!Reader Warnings: 18+, smut, explicit sex, alcohol A/N: masterpost & links are pinned on my tumblr.

You let out a sigh as you were walking on your way home from a long day. The weather was hot today, so your long ginger-red hair was sticking to your back. You shaked your hair to get some air under your hair and when that didnt help you tied your hair up into a bun. You walked up the stairs to your little apartment, as you opened your bag to find your keys. You unlocked the door and walked inside to find the remote to the air condition on the wall and turned it on. You let out a breath as you stood underneath it to cool down.

You turned around to put your groceries in the fridge. You got your eye on the white wine you opened yesterday and grabbed it from the fridge. You poured yourself some wine and sat down in your couch. You bowed down and grabbed a box from under the couch. Inside there was secret documents that you had gotten in the mail, which was the reason why you came to Riverdale.

Inside there was your birth certificate and you found a note where it stood: From Alice cooper. Apperently this Alice had sent them to you months ago. So when you found this Alice Cooper from Riverdale, ofcourse you packed a bag and travelled to find Riverdale and this woman, only when you found this woman you ended up getting interviewed instead of getting answers. She swore that she had found them in her mailbox and had made copies and mailed them to you. She swore she didnt know anything more.

That woman really got on your nerves, you left that day and promised yourself you were going to find out what the hell is going on. You bought an apartment and got a job at some diner named pop’s. You just had to find out what actually stood on that birth certificate. But the thing was they had been blacked out and when you asked your adoptive parents they said it was an closed adoption so they knew nothing. you figured out you were on your own.

You sighed and took a big sip of wine as you threw the box away. After a couple of weeks after you had settled in, you found someone who was willing to help you. He was tall, dangerous smile and god damn: handsome as fuck. So was it really a suprise you couldnt resist and eventually flirted with him? For months you had worked together to try to find out who you are related to, But you grew more interested in him than your birth parents.

You wanted to know the truth ofcourse but you already had a family who you missed like crazy and loved deeply.. You only did this cause you hated not knowing. You wanted to know but this man, right now, he was much more intresting. After months with flirting you fell hard. He had flirted back and he was after all trying to help you, but you could tell he should be with someone else. Infact he convinced you today himself.

Today at 4 pm:

"Hi, could you please take out the trash and then youre done for the day apperantly." Pop said as he looked up at the clock and continued to help some costumers. "sure, thanks pop" you said simply and smiled as you carried out the trash. You smiled knowing you actually had began feeling comfterable in your new job. You loved talking to the costumers and serving people who lighten up when you served the famous milkshakes at pops.

You tried to open the door with one foot, cause you were carrying so much garbage, so you turned around and dragged them out. You felt a firm hand on your back which made you starled. "what" you said as you turned around to figure out who it was. "hi" Fp said in a low tone, he slowly inhaled your scent.

"hi" you said with a half smile and tried to walk over to the garbadge cans. As if he had just woken up he walked over to you and grabbed the trash from your hands and smiled "I'll help" he smiled, the actual smile that made your knees turn into gello. You opened the trashbins and he threw in the trash easily. "Thanks" you smiled and walked away from the smelly trashcans. "can we talk?" he asked. "Sure" you said and he followed you around the corner where there was more privacy. "what's up" you asked.

He sighed out loudly and it looked like he was debating on what to say. "tell me" you said as you took your handkerchief from your apron and playfully smacked him on his arm. He let out a short laugh as he sighed long. "I found out something big and I think you should sit down" he said, you looked worried at him. "just tell me" you asked and he sighed "alright" he looked into your eyes as he said. "Youre a blossom" he said "blossom? really?" you asked and knew some stories from the blossom family. You had heard allot of stories at pop's, so you werent all unimformed.

"apperently Clifford and Penelope Blossom tried to hide the fact they got pregnant when they were young and had you adopted." he explained. "wow" you simply stated. "I need some time to thaw on this" you said. But honestly you were more concerned with him. Right now he felt so right in your life that he had become the light in your life. Everytime the bell rang at pops you hoped it was him, you became more and more invested in this research because of him?

"are you ok?" he asked. you shaked our head clean, from stopping yourself of thinking anymore about this. "yeah, anyways I should probobly go, thanks again" you said and hated that, thats what came out of your own mouth. "I mean it, thank you so much" you tried to smile and he took out his hand and touched your arm. The warmth that came from his hand made your heart flutter. you starred into his eyes as you walked closer to him and gave him a hug.

He arms wrapped softly around your waist and you heard yourself exhale. "thanks" you whispered softly, you tried to walk away from his hug but it was so damn hard. You didnt want to leave. you felt his cheek come close into yours, you leaned back to get a look at his lips. He licked his lips dry as you were just inches away from eachother, you looked into his eyes and bit your lower lip. he stared at your lip as he leaned closer to you-

"FP!" someone yelled. A familiar female voice stopped you from finally tasting his lips, he sighed "sorry I got to go" he said. he pulled back away from you and walked away, suddenly he was gone. You touched your cheek as you felt the warmth from where his chin had just been, slowly fade away and turned cold. You closed your eyes and wanted to savior every moment.

You grabbed your bag and were ready to head home. You were dizzy from the heated moment from you and Fp still. you walked outside of pops after you had just said goodbye to everyone. You were on your way to the car. Months of pining after him and Alice just- "FP!" Alice exclaimed "Im in love with you and I want to be with you" she said. You froze and looked at where the voice were coming from. "I can't believe this" you felt tears build up as you saw Fp hold her both hands and said something only she could hear. "I cant believe this" you uttered under your breath.

Now 6pm:

Yep, that happened. You felt anger rise inside you as you inhaled and exhaled. You rised up to go and find something stronger to drink. You opened your cabins from the kitchen and found a bottle. «There you are» you sighed, grabbed a shotglass and poured tequila into it. «fuck them» you said as you raised your hand and threw down the shot.

Today you had found out the truth and that you were some secret blossom daughter. Honestly you didnt care about the blossom family, you already had a loving family. The only thing you couldnt get out of your head was him, you just wanted him.

But you cant have him, because of Alice. Fuck this and fuck him and her, you made up your mind to go out and drink somewhere not alone. You took another shot and changed out of your uniform into something better. You found a black strapless dress and put on some red lipstick.

You stood ready to leave when you opened the door and you saw him standing there in the doorway. "hi" he said as he starred at you on your dress "what do you want?" you asked as you leaned your hand on your waist as you held the door open with your other hand. He couldn't stop looking at your waist and tried to not stare his hardest but failing. "why aren't you with Alice?" you asked with a mean look. "If you came here to gloat why didnt you bring Alice?" you joked and shaked your head, you looked into his eyes waiting for him to respond.

"hm?" he looked up confused "wait, why are you talking about Alice?" you crossed your hands and shaked your head. "I couldn't care less about Alice" he reasured. "yeah right" you let out a snort and tried to shut the door in his face but he grabbed the door and walked halfway inside and looked at you with a smile which made your knees turn into gello once again.

"youre mean" you barely managed to say. He walked inside, closed the door behind him and gave you a puzzling look. "what" you asked annoyed. "Do you know how frustrating this whole situation is?" he sighed as he walked further inside the apartment, He had been here a couple of times but he never let you out of his sight. he slowly walked over to you until he stood close enough for you to inhale his perfume.

the perfume made you let out a whimper, you covered your mouth trying to hide the sound that made him look into your eyes with hunger "what do you want? and why arent you with alice, you should be with her, not me" he shaked his head slowly as you asked all these questions, he looked down on his shoes and let out a sigh "y/n" he began "can you leave, If youre going to let me know youre not interested you didnt have to come here and pity me, I have your money right here, so you can just go back to that fuckin-" you barked.

he looked at you with a tense look in his eyes and interupted you "I dont care about Alice" he explained and shook his head, "what are you even talking about, I want you!" he said annoyed "I didnt come here for her or money" he took out his hand and placed it under your chin. "I came here for you" he whispered, "can you please stop making this so damn difficult" he let out a short laugh. "I saw you in your car today driving home from pops, I know what you saw and I knew you would misunderstand, She was jelaous of you and wanted to be with me, but I told her that I was falling for someone else" He leaned closer to you, just a few inches away from your lips.

You held out your hand on his chest trying to stop him, you felt his heart bump like crazy under your palm. "Fp" you whispered, he grabbed your hand and guided you around his neck as he leaned closer to your ear. "I dont have anything more to talk about that woman, I only want to talk about us." he whispered, "I want to feel you lay naked under me" he said as he kissed your chin "I have wanted to kiss your neck for months now" he said as he kissed your neck softly, you let out a whimper.

"How much more do I have to explain to you that youre the one I want?" he kissed your chin once more and grabbed your head and looked softly into your eyes. "I'm in love with you, not her" he finally said and waited for you to respond. you completly froze and after a second your body reacted "don't break my heart" you said and kissed him deeply, he inhaled your kiss and sucked your lips playfully.

He broke the kiss and grabbed your legs and held you in his arms as he walked into the wall, as he deepend the kiss. he pushed you up into the wall more as he licked your upper lip. You held his shoulders, he grabbed your thighs and lifted slowly up your dress as he kissed your neck with soft kisses.

He grunted as he grabbed your ass and pushed himself into your core. You let out a whimper as his hard shaft made contact with your core, you began thrusting into his shaft and wanted to kiss him more. He grunted and thrusted back as he opend his mouth to let you explore his tounge.

His eyes fell behind his head as he let out a deep grunt. "youre already so wet for me" he smirked and grabbed your waist. "please let me taste you" he asked as his voice broke. "in there" you managed to let out and he turned carried you into your bedroom.

He layed your body down on the bed and took off his jacket and shirt, You felt his gaze burn onto your body, He was so beautiful. You threw off your dress and were about to take off your panties, but he stopped you "let me" he asked and took off his shoes and pants. He bent down to your core, and grabbed your waist and pulled you twoards his mouth as he dragged your panties off your waist.

He licked his lips dry "youre so beautiful I can't-" He tasted you with a flat tounge. "you taste so good, I-" he said with a smirk and tasted you once more and he was not being shy, letting out all sorts of sounds as he tasted every inch of your core. You let a whimper and felt euphoric as he couldn't stop tasting you.

He looked up at you and smirked "if you let out a whimper one more time I can't stop myself from-" he began while he took one of his fingers and touched your g-spot. your head flew back as a result and you let out a moan. He stopped and flew over you in a second to kiss you deeply.

His hard long shaft was throbbing against your core, you both wanted more contact from eachother but couldnt stop kissing. "you drive me insane" he whispered as he thrusted gently into your core and started to find a slow rythum. "take it off" you said and he smirked. "do it" you pleaded and tried to take off his underpants yourself.

He stood up from the bed and dragged off his underpants and your gaze went straight to his big throbbing manhood, you let out a whimper as he rushed over to you again and kissed your neck. "Do you know how hard it is to be around you and not wanting to kiss you?" he whispered into your ear as he let his shaft close to your core.

Your hips began moving wanting some friction. "Ive wanted to to this for so long now, and I want to see your hauntingly beautiful face when my dick makes you orgasm." his voice broke as he grunted and pushed his long shaft into you. "FP" you let out a moan, he started to thrust slowly to make you adjust to his size. "I want you so bad" you whimpered, you felt your entire body turn electric at the contact of his skin, his body and his breath.

He thrusted slowly and began turn up the pace as he kept kissing your neck and then he pulled out and sat in a upright position, as he grabbed your body and you felt like a magnet, searching for contact.

you sat down ontop of him and began to ride him, your lips searched for his lips as you looked into his beautiful eyes. "Im so in love with you" he whimpered, you let out a moan as his words were making you close to climax. "You're so beautiful I cant get enough of you" he said as he began breathing heavier.

"I cant wait to see beautiful orgasm" he panted "youre doing so amazing" you kissed him deeply and grabbed his shoulders and started to pick up the pace, "Im gonna-" you let out a moan and felt your orgasm come closer, you pushed his body down on the bed and held his hands down beside his head. He sat up his legs to thrust into you as you finally felt the orgasm take over your entire body. "Your orgasm is making me so hard" he said as he kept thrusting as you rode out your orgasm.

He pulled out and you grabbed his shaft, he let out a moan at your contact. You licked his length and started adjust his size into your mouth as he thrusted himself into you. "Im-" he panted and you bobbed your head in a rythum as he thrusted himself slowly into your mouth. "Im-" his orgasm shot electricity threw your body as you watched him cum on your stomach.

You walked off the bed and held out your hand, "shower with me?" you asked. He smirked and raised up from the bed, he grabbed your hand and kissed your arm and upwards your shoulder then he kissed you deeply "I would love to"

[mikufigureoftheday]

i got a new shelf recently so perhaps it is time i show you my meeks (featuring some other blorbos)

both of the figmas ARE BROKENnnnn (one more visibly so) im never buying them again😭😭😭look at these thinfs wrong and they explode /silly (they were overproced too and now i couldnt sell them for 10 dollars live and learn i guess)

latest is dark angel who ive wanted for a long time but i only bother buying on ebay and there were fakes floating around for a while. WxS miku is hell on earth bc her parts cannot stay on properly, she looses half her hair when too much wind blows (exaderation but it did fall of several times while i was arranging the figures, her tail too)

thats why i love dark angel shes surprisingly sturdy, more then any other figure i gave. you could throw her off a building and that hair would stay in. bless

my old shelf was much wider so all my AMP figures could comfortably fit next to eachother but now they look kinda awkward, i really underestimated their size

my favourite mikus are dark angel and the alice in wonderland

UHM ALSO FOR THE LONGEST TIME I WAS CONVINCED THAT SAKURA WAS AN AMP FIGURE EVEN THO I *HAVE THE BOX* NO WHERE DOES IT SAY AMP 😭😭😭

ichigo_mik on ebay is my saviour they often have the best prices on ebay and the first time one orders from them you get a snack. also im aware i could find cheaper on other sites but i already have ebay figured out huehue,, biggest problem is probably customs in my country they dont give me as much trouble with anything else as much as figures

i also once bought a set of fakes because they were cheap and i found them funny but i dont have my own picture of them on hand rn but heres from the listing

i gave fake sakura to a friend bc i already had one real sakura lol. the one on the top right has very unstable hair so ive stashed her hair away, the snow miku is oddly big and heavy, the easter ones head is made from a weirdly soft plastic so her head is squishy 😭 and infinity is nothing special. i love my fakeus

im so sorry how this is written im tired ushvfzhsgt 😭😭😭😭😭

I've always loved that dark angel one, but the fact that she could also apparently be used as a weapon makes me love her even more LMAO

You've got a good grouping here, both currently and what you've given away!! I'm always glad to see the birthday cat one and that giant beach one on the bottom shelf is so cool.........

I love figmas, but I'm always afraid I'm going to break mine so I give them the like most generic poses to achieve stability (╥_╥) they look so lame next to the scales/nendos sometimes LMAO

Thanks for sharing all your goodies and the story behind your collection!!! 11/10 very good keep it up

[whumpshaped]

HUNTER BECOMES HUNTER FOR THE BINGO

i didnt mean to lump so many of these together but i had a Vision and i couldnt figure out how to Not lump them together- also it got super long i am so sorry

masterlist bingo card

tw vampire whumper, vampire whumpee, mind control, death, murder, a whole massacre really, stalking, loss, grief, minor burns, conditioning, manipulation, threats, memory loss

As the days passed, Beck found it harder and harder to ignore the memories. Helle had done a wonderful job at making him remember, even when he wanted nothing more than to forget. All that conditioning, manipulation, paranoia, gaslighting– it was all coming back, and it all made him fear them again. It made him see how rotten to the core they really were, no matter how desperately he tried to stay ignorant.

And he was stuck with them. Stuck with a monster who was more than happy to exploit all his fears and desires, his wishes and his vulnerability. They allowed him multiple more chances to practise his magic, entirely confident that he wouldn't be able to do it; and they were right. It was a wretched fucking situation to be in. Helle was giving him more and more reasons to want to run, while simultaneously blocking one exit after the other.

He was a rat trapped in an impossible maze, and the floor was getting hotter by the second — no matter how fast he tried to run, no matter how many times he thought he saw a way out, the only thing real in his life were the burns on his little rat paws.

He wanted the easy bliss of memory loss. That was the only thing that could've made this all bearable. He wouldn't flinch from Helle brushing against him if he didn't remember all the times he'd cried for them not to. He wouldn't question their sweet smiles and honeyed words if he didn't remember all the times they'd hidden traps and lies.

He tried to pretend he was still oblivious. He remembered what it felt like to be under the vampire's spell. He remembered the unconditional trust, the love, the adoration. He could replicate it. He could make it a reality again, if he tried hard enough. He could manufacture those same feelings, possibly even hold onto the last remnants of his rose-tinted glasses. He just had to try harder.

-

Helle was on cloud nine; had been for the past week. Everything was going splendidly! Beck was slowly remembering his life from before, and while he was getting more and more anxious in a way that might've otherwise been a cause for concern, now that they knew he was a runt, it was merely entertaining. Beck wasn't going to run off, nor was he about to commit some atrocities against them. No, he was just going to sit there and take whatever they decided to put him through, like a good boy.

The thought made them shudder with pure excitement. This was everything. Everything they'd wished for after their siblings had left. Everything they'd wished could've gone right was now going right. Beck was the perfect thrall and the perfect sired, he was their prized possession, their pampered little lapdog, their most important project for the next several decades, if not centuries. The first vampire they'd make so obsessed with them that he wouldn't ever want to leave.

That was where Lady Marie had miscalculated, they thought. She'd tried to use fear as the primary motivator. They weren't going to be so stupid. They were going to use something far more compelling.

Of course, being the perfect candidate he was, Beck was already working hard to make their job infinitely easier. He was practically deluding himself into loving them, they barely had to say a word. Even with his memories returning, he seemed to be trying his damnedest to push them aside and stay good. What more could they wish for, really?

Helle stopped in their tracks, and the enthralled human they had with them followed suit. As exciting as all the planning was, and as untouchable as they'd felt in recent days, they had to stay present sometimes. Especially when they got the distinct feeling that they were being watched.

They turned around, squinting at the empty road and the bushes and trees on either side. They couldn't smell any humans other than the one they'd brought here... nor any vampires, really.

Maybe they were wrong. Who would come to their mansion anyway? No one had attempted to kill them since that poor fucker Beck had tried to hire, and the last attempt before that had been decades ago. Still... They had just properly kidnapped him. If his family was anything like him, they might actually try to get him back.

Helle shrugged and turned back towards their house, throwing the doors open theatrically and announcing they were home.

-

He never fucking heeded any warnings, did he? And he never ever considered that he wasn't invincible, that bad things could happen to him, that maybe his mother was right to worry.

Joey's heart was pounding loudly in his chest as he lay — hopefully — hidden by an overgrown barberry bush, waiting for the vampire to continue walking. Fuck. Fuck. Why weren't they going? Did they spot him? Did all the things he had rubbed into his clothes to cover his scent fail? Please no. Please, he just wanted to see his brother. He couldn't die like this.

He held his breath for as long as he could, squeezing his eyes shut in utter terror. The night was quiet and chilly, and he tried his best not to shiver lest he rustle any leaves and give his position away. It felt like an eternity before he heard footsteps again — ones that were slowly fading.

Never in his life had he exhaled so slowly and carefully before. He couldn't even imagine what the vampire would've done to him, had they figured out he was there. Would he have been turned into a thrall? Or simply killed? Or scared halfway to death, then sent away to bring word of just how much of a terrifying monster they were?

It didn't matter. They'd left. He was safe.

He cautiously crawled out from under the bush, unable to resist a closer look at the mansion. In a perfect world, the vampire would've been away for just a few minutes longer, allowing Joey time to peek inside. But of course, the world wasn't perfect, and he couldn't be lucky in everything.

He flinched at every little sound, expecting the front door to open and the vampire to find him just a few feet away from the walls, lying in the grass like an idiot. The thought nearly made him flee at the last second, but he persevered, eventually arriving to a spot right under one of the huge windows.

Oh, how wonderful it would be to break those damn windows during the day, and let the stupid bloodsucker burn.

Joey took a few steadying breaths, then began slowly rising to his feet. Just a peek. All he needed was a peek inside. Just one glance at his brother, so he'd know he was alive.

He almost ducked back down when he spotted the vampire from before. Thankfully, they had their back turned to him, granting him just a few seconds to at least look around what seemed like a huge living room. Should vampires even have living rooms? A question for another day.

The setting was perfect for some stalking, really. With the lights on inside and the darkness outside, Joey didn't have to try very hard to pick out even little details. The vampire was holding the thrall by the waist, beckoning to someone else. Fuck, were there more of them? Taking out one vampire was difficult enough as it was, but a whole den...?

He shouldn't panic. At least he would have valuable information to bring back for the hunters, right? Thank god he decided to go on this rogue mission!

But all manner of conscious thought went out the window as soon as the other vampire arrived.

That couldn't be right. Was he hallucinating? Were the sleepless nights finally getting to him? That couldn't be right.

Joey felt like he was going to pass out. Why...? There was no reason– Why did they turn Beck into a vampire? Was this real? Was this actually real? Beck should've been kept as a thrall!

Well, he shouldn't have been held captive at all. But being a thrall would've been reversible, it would've been something– something he could fix! But this...?

He watched with wide eyes as his brother hesitantly approached the human, looking awfully distraught and apologetic. Of course. Beck would've never hurt anyone if he could help it. God, this must've been... this must've been...

Joey froze when Beck glanced towards the window. For the briefest moment, he thought it wouldn't end badly — that was his brother, his best friend, the person he would've sacrificed so much for. Surely, Beck would be happy to see that he came to rescue him, right?

But the fantasy was shattered when the other vampire turned and followed his gaze, their curious red eyes settling right on him. An intruder. The human they'd failed to notice just a few minutes prior.

He ran without thinking.

He knew this was the end of the line for him if the vampire caught him, and he also knew that there was no way he could outrun a monster like that. All he could count on was Beck somehow holding them back, or distracting them, or– or–

He didn't know. He just ran, as fast as he could, hoping, praying he would live to tell the tale.

Joey only stopped when it felt like his lungs would explode otherwise, collapsing on the sidewalk from utter exhaustion. He waved off several people who'd tried to help, assuring everyone that he just needed a moment to get himself together.

"I s-saw a vampire," he choked out. "I– I'll b-be fine, I just... I just got scared."

"Where?"

"Is the vampire close?"

"Are we in danger?"

Joey shook his head. "Several streets away. I ran a lot."

He didn't start fully processing the events until he got home. Tears of helplessness and sorrow were streaming down his face, washing away some of the dirt that had stuck to it.

Honestly? He could've lived with Beck becoming a vampire. It wasn't a good situation, not by any means, but Beck was his brother, and he was prepared to love him through whatever nonsense he'd got tangled up in.

The thing that absolutely ripped his heart to shreds was the fact that there was no recognition in his eyes when he'd looked at him. The two of them looked so alike, there was no way to deny them being brothers... and yet, Beck just looked startled and confused. Like he was nothing but a stranger.

-

"Don't!" Beck cried desperately, grabbing Helle by the hand before they could've gone after the stranger. "Please, don't, you've already kidnapped someone tonight! Please, let him go!"

"Do you have any idea who that was?"

He paused, slowly letting go of Helle's coat when he realised they weren't going to hunt him down. "I... n-not really." Now that they mentioned it, the guy did look familiar in a way. Nothing he could pin down, though. He already hadn't been good with remembering faces before dying, and death certainly hadn't helped. "But it doesn't matter, I just don't want– I don't want more innocents getting hurt. Please."

Helle considered him for a second. "Do you really have no idea?" they asked again, gentler this time. It was beginning to make Beck feel quite stupid. Was that person important? Someone who had been close to him in his life?

The brother Helle had spoken of?

No, Helle had said he'd left behind a twin brother. There was no way he could forget–

Beck frowned. He... had no idea what he looked like. How could he recognise his twin brother, if he had no recollection of his own face, and no reflection to check?

"Who was it?" He sounded timid, as though he was afraid of the answer; and in a way, he really was. Did he even want to know? Or did he want to simply ignore all of this emotional turmoil?

The decision was made for him when Helle waved him off. "I will tell you later. Or the next time he shows up. I have a feeling he will not be alone."

-

"I have to go with them!" Joey demanded, and his mother sighed.

"Listen... As much as I want to go as well, I think it'd be counter-productive. If we tell the hunters not to hurt him, then they won't! We don't need to be there to enforce it, or... or I don't think..."

"But you don't know! They're hunters! They want to kill vampires, that's what they do, they don't care who Beck used to be! Especially since he didn't even recognise me!"

"Joey, if he doesn't recognise you–" Her voice broke, and she abruptly turned away with a hand over her mouth. She was trying to hold back tears, and Joey tried to remind himself that he needed to dial it back. It was a difficult situation for everyone involved.

"I'm sorry," he mumbled, and his mother shook her head.

"No, it's... It's understandable. You want to protect Beck. I do, too."

"I know."

"I think..." She took a deep breath, wiping away a tear that threatened to betray just how emotionally exhausted she was. "I think if Beck doesn't recognise us, then we can't really do anything to help. I can't drag home an unwilling vampire. Neither can you. I don't even know if..."

"If we should," he finished quietly. His mother nodded.

The implications hung in the air between them, unspoken yet still so loud. What was the alternative? Let Beck live his new vampire life? Never talk to him again? The hunters wouldn't like that. Unless they figured out a way to make Beck remember, a way to show everyone that he was still the same awkward guy deep down, and not a dangerous monster... there was no way he would avoid a stake to the heart.

"I have to go, mom. If I do, maybe– maybe he'll realise who I am, and..."

She dragged both hands down her face, visibly frustrated with the whole thing. They both wished it could've been easier. "I'm scared," she admitted after a pause. "I'm scared of losing him again. I'm scared of losing you. I'm scared of being killed by the vampire who took him. I'm scared of seeing those hunters hurt him... I'm scared."

"You don't have to come. I can go alone–"

"Again?" Joey stayed quiet. Clearly, his mom hadn't yet forgiven him his little outing. "It doesn't matter what I say, does it? You'll go either way."

He didn't see a reason to lie or pretend. "Yeah. I have to be there. I know he'll be scared of the hunters, he needs at least one... semi-familiar face."

His mother nodded. "We'll go. We'll bring him home."

-

Helle wasn't the least bit surprised when they woke up the sound of glass shattering. It was the middle of the day, and they were pretty sure they could hear the hunters tearing down the curtains downstairs.

Great.

"Go into every room!" someone shouted.

Oh dear. They were going to trash the whole place.

Beck barged in just a second later, slamming the door shut after himself. He looked terrified, and for good reason; if he had been found alone, he would've had no chance of surviving against a large group of trained humans.

Were they trained? They sounded trained.

"What's going on?" he whimpered, reminding them of their younger self. Their first hunter encounter. Oh, they had been scared too.

"We have visitors," Helle replied with a soft smile. "Your family must have worked very hard to find such a big group."

"M-my family?"

"Who else?" They walked over and patted his cheek. "They want their darling boy back."

"I don't want to– I don't want them to be here!" he blurted out. "I want them to go! What if their hunters hurt me? What if they hurt you? This is going to be a massacre again, I don't want this, I don't want any of this!"

"They're upstairs!" came the voice from closer than before, followed by the sounds of quick footsteps on the carpeted stairs. Beck was sobbing by now, and Helle realised they hated it. They didn't want anyone else to make Beck cry. Or scared. Or distressed.

"Stay here," they ordered gently. "You shall be safe and protected so long as you do not leave my bedroom. Understood?"

"A-and you? M-Master, you can't–"

"Beck, listen to me. Do you understand?"

In the midst of all that chaos, the sound of hunters kicking down doors and breaking windows, he finally nodded. They couldn't resist giving him a quick kiss on the cheek before they shoved him towards the back of the room, then walked out into the hallway.

-

Beck was shaking uncontrollably. His mind was so consumed with panic that for a moment he even forgot he was a vampire, attempting to pull the curtains aside to peek out– He abandoned that plan very quickly when his fingers got scorched, letting out a cry of pain.

Stupid. He was so stupid. Stupid, weak, useless, possibly about to be staked within the next five minutes. Maybe Helle had already been staked! What were they thinking?

He couldn't pick out too many specific sounds from the hall, and it made him anxious. He heard screams, and cries, and... and sounds he couldn't even describe. He smelled blood, a lot of it, and it scared him, and all he wanted to do was hide under the bed and never come out.

But Helle had said his family was out there. Was it their blood? Was Helle about to murder his family? Would he even recognise their corpses? He suddenly remembered the stranger from a few days ago. Would he be among the dead? He looked so hopeful that night, in the window. Almost relieved, for a split second, before Helle noticed him. Helle never ended up telling him who that was.

"Beck!" someone shouted desperately, and he felt an overwhelming urge to answer, to run out of the bedroom and look for the source of the voice. "Beck, please, we need to go!"

Go where?

Home, a little voice whispered. You could go home.

But he was home.

In the end, it wasn't the strangers' calls that lured him out. It was a pained hiss from Helle, one he would've recognised anywhere, finally prompting him to fling the door open and rush outside no matter the cost. Helle was all that he had, and they were risking their life to keep him safe. There was no way he was going to keep cowering in the corner of their bedroom.

The scene in front of him was something out of a horror movie. All he saw was blood everywhere, painting the floor and the walls bright red. There were glass shards, limbs, and guts scattered about, the mutilated bodies of several people dressed in protective hunting gear, there was sunlight pouring inside from broken windows, silver weapons stuck between wooden floorboards or uselessly lying several feet away from anyone who could've used them.

None of that mattered. His eyes went to Helle immediately, and he dashed between them and a half-dead hunter who was just about to pull the trigger on her crossbow.

Several people screamed his name at the same time, but it was mere background noise compared to the sharp pain that exploded in his chest. He didn't look down. He didn't dare look down. He looked at Helle instead, drinking in the image of them being okay and alive, almost giddy at the thought of having protected them.

"She a-almost hit you," he stammered between two wheezing breaths, as an answer to the question he saw in Helle's wide eyes.

What the fuck are you doing outside?

-

"No!" Joey screamed, abandoning all precautions and running over to his brother. He tried not to think about the bodies he had to step over, or the sound his shoes made as his feet landed in puddles of blood.

It couldn't be. It couldn't be. It couldn't be.

"Beck!" He tired to pull him away, only to immediately be grabbed and thrown across the hall. He heard his mother's scream before he hit the ground with an agonised cry and a dull thump, and he knew just from the way he landed on his arm that it had to be broken. Still, he tried to get up right away, desperate to help Beck.

"Joey!" His mother ran over to help him up, wincing when she saw his arm. "Joey, you can't–"

"Is he okay?" he demanded. "Is he alive? Is he fucking alive?" He could see the vampire on their knees next to the body, and he felt his blood boil. How dare the fucking bloodsucker pretend they cared about his brother? When they were the one who turned him, the one who put him in danger, the one who– who had possibly gotten him killed? "Get away from him, you fucking monster!" he yelled, but he didn't even get a reaction.

"Joey," his mother tried again, her voice shaky and urgent. "Please, they'll kill you–"

"So let them," he choked out. "Let them. If Beck's dead, then I don't even care. But I need to know." He yanked his good arm out of her mother's hold and tried to approach the vampire again, but she ran ahead, blocking his path with outstretched arms.

"Is he alive?" she called, way less hostile than Joey had been. "Please, we just– we just want our family back!"

"You almost got your family killed," the vampire replied coldly, and Joey could've wept from relief. Almost. The stupid hunter missed. Beck was alive, he was alive, there was a chance–

A chance for what?

He stared at the bodies in front of him, slowly processing what this all meant. They were all dead. The vampire had killed seven hunters by themself, and now they were trapped in here with them, almost completely defenceless, and with a broken arm in his case. And the vampire was angry.

"We just wanted to get him back," his mother went on, and she sounded so heartbroken and scared, he couldn't imagine anyone wanting to raise a hand at her. And the vampire didn't, not yet anyway. They stayed in the shadows with Beck, never even looking at the two of them.

"How sweet," they said sarcastically.

"You wouldn't fucking know the first thing about it, would you?" Joey snapped. "No, you kidnap and murder for fun, you tear apart families, you– you're a fucking demon!"

-

"Stop," Beck begged weakly, and the entire mansion seemed to fall silent at his request.

Now that the stupid piece of wood was out of his chest and Helle was holding his hand gently, the situation felt less dire, but he couldn't handle the anxiety of listening to others yell at them. Were these people really his family? The ones causing all this destruction and fear, all this death?

"Why would you try to protect them?" the man — his brother — asked. Joel, was it? Joey. "We almost– almost got them, and... and you stood between..."

"I had to protect them," he said like it was obvious, and Helle squeezed his hand a little.

"You are so stupid," they whispered. "I told you to stay in the room." Although they were scolding him, Beck felt like the tone was somehow simultaneously loving. Not quite grateful, but... close.

"Don't you want to come home?" Joey tried again, and he could hear the woman — his mother — sobbing. His chest ached for reasons beyond the stake that was shot through it, and he wished he could've just said yes and gone with them. But they didn't feel like the family from his fragmented memories, nor did he want to make Helle angry with him.

"I don't think I should," he forced out eventually. Helle squeezed his hand again. Good answer.

"Beck–"

"He gave you an answer," Helle cut in before his mother could've said anything more. "Do not assume my patience lasts forever."

"Go home," Beck asked, the urgency evident in his voice. He didn't want more bloodshed. He didn't want his family to be killed, even if they'd made an attempt on Helle's life. Even if they'd scared him half to death and one of their hunters almost finished the job. "Please. I'm sorry I can't go with you."

"Of course you can," his mother breathed. "Beck, we miss you so unbearably much. We love you."

"I love you too. I think. I, I know I do, it's just... it's so hard to remember..."

"We can help you remember, sweetheart."

Beck shook his head. "N-no, mom, I– I need to stay. I want to stay."

I can't survive out there. Who will feed me? Who will protect me?

"Will you visit?" Joey asked brokenly.

He glanced at Helle, and he felt a sudden rush of terror. He had no idea what it was, but something about their expression told him that nothing good would come from it.

Would they kill his family just to keep him to themself?

He didn't want to find out.

"No," he said softly. "I'm sorry."

"How tragic," Helle remarked without any emotion behind it. "I do believe that is the end of this discussion, then."

Joey stepped forward, his grief making him bolder than what would've been smart. "You can't do this! You can't keep him from his family–"

"If you take another step," Helle began slowly, "it will be your last. Do you want your mother burying two sons?"

Beck closed his eyes, hoping Joey would make the right choice.

Please. Please. Just leave. Just leave me already. Forget me, and let me forget.

"Let's go home, Joey," he heard his mother say as calmly as she could.

"Mom..."

"Our door is always open to him. But we can't force him."

Beck sniffled, and this time he was the one squeezing Helle's hand. They gently brushed a thumb over his skin, silently reassuring him. He was making the right choice for his family, even if they were being so difficult about it.

So why did it make him want to cry so much?

"You really just expect us t-to leave without you?" Joey choked out.

"Okay, I think I have been more than patient." Helle stood up from next to him, and Beck turned towards his family in a panic.

"Go!" he yelled. "Go, please, just go! Mom, do something, take..." He trailed off as he saw his brother's eyes become distant and hollow. Why? Why couldn't he just leave? Why couldn't he leave when he was told to, why did it have to go like this?

"Joey?" His mother gently shook him by the shoulder, worried out of her mind. "Joey!"

"It will wear off," Helle said nonchalantly. "Joey, be good and go with your mother."

She flinched when Joey turned to face her, his expression way too blank for someone who had been so heated a moment ago. "Are we going?" he asked almost impatiently. So eager to obey the command.

Beck couldn't even say goodbye to him.

"We are," she conceded. "Goodbye, Beck. You know where to find us, if... if you ever change your mind. I love you. We love you."

"Goodbye, mom. I love you too." He watched as she took Joey by the hand, as though she expected him to suddenly forget how to walk properly because of the enthrallment, and led him back down the stairs. "Goodbye, Joey," he whispered.

His tears didn't start in earnest until he heard the front door open and close behind them.

~

taglist: @whumpsday @the-scrapegoat @hidden-dreamland @dismemberment-on-a-tuesday-night @delicateprincepaper @whumppmuhw @florissimps @nicolepascaline @oliversrarebooks @the-cyrulik @pirefyrelight @there-will-always-be-blood @pigeonwhumps @echo-goes-mmm @whumpycries @morning-star-whump @d-cs @watermelons-dont-grow-on-trees @tauntedoctopuses @blueyellow8green @typewrittenfangs @whumpsoda @steh-lar-uh-nuhs @auroragehenna

[squishious]

ok i'd apologize to you & everyone else for only blogging about myself and my friends tonight but actually that would be un-sincere because i love my friends so so so much and all of life is about love. anyway here's a long summary of css :

-1. the context: luna @hanjoonhwi got to know mika through me and @ramonapest and so she'd discover old stuff progressively and one day she found css and made it her whole personality (read: blog) because she did that often (for a while she was tomorrowlive because she loved live performances of tomorrow, etc etc etc) and so she saved the url cokestudiostardust or i did. and then we had the fantastic idea of both changing our urls to something super similar to each other for a little while just to confuse the 12 mika blogs here (a small group of which are commonly referred to as "the rodents" due to the existance of an almost-dead discord server that i would like to bring back alive and that you could probably be added to, where we discuss mika) ANYWAY sorry for the slight detour. so yes that was the plan. and then we were like wait we need to include rory (because we had a tiny groupchat called "mouaylor tshirts" <- more lore there but basically luna wanted a mika x taylor x louis collab and rory made a fake poster that i put on redbubble models and so we made a groupchat to discuss business and then ended up being besties). so yes back to the main story. we text rory and we're like hey do you wanna join us in this wild scheme? she was like what scheme? we said say yes or no because we cant tell you unless you're joining. she said yes and we told her everything and also she was moving that same weekend... so it was insane of her to contribute. but yes that's the end of this part

0. the prep: so we saved css url, and 2 typo css urls. picked an icon header and background colour for the blog (#facade pink) and then the point was to confuse people so we didn't want them to be able to scroll adn figure out easily which one is rory vs luna vs me. so what we did is we made rory (?) i think (?) post a link to the css yt video. then we each reblogged it privately to our blogs about 100 times in preparation and then didn't blog until the day of. the day of we unprivated all the posts, so basically if you wanted to see any posts before you'd need to scroll for so long. and we changed our urls (i dont remember who was which url) and icons and headers and colours and made our blogs only available on phone so you couldnt go to archive to figure out who was who. also we had the same blog titles (coke studio stardust) and bios.

1. phase 1: we basically went around blogging normally as if nothing happened, but also sending asks to common mutuals and each others mutuals (ex: "hiii squish!! how are you???") and all of us sending them, to create confusion. did that for about 24 hours. but the thing is we sent the exact same asks and reblogged all the same posts with the same tags. luna and i even managed to confuse rory's sibling and like long-time friend on here. a mika blog @grayskelly we didnt know at the time (but v knows) just joined us (same blog appearance etc) and became our immediate bestie, hence creating the famous and iconic @h-isforhome "big day in mika fandom" post (the first one in the image post you reblogged). also we followed any mutuals that we mutuals with 2 but not 3 of us (pretending we accidentally unfollowed) in prep for phase 2

2. phase 2: (my favourite phase) we "apologized" etc for our behaviour and said we are switching back. BUT we lied (celebrity apology video style), and what we did is switch to each other's!! blogs. so i was luna and luna was rory and rory was me. and it actually fooled people due to all the followings in phase 1 and it being practically impossible to go to posts pre may 15. this phase particularly drove people insane (luna and i were competing over who would lose the most followers, rory somehow was gaining followers). but yes basically we blogged exactly lik each other, tagging systems etc, spoke like each other (hashtag true bestiehood), and sent even more asks. the middle 2 pics are examples of such interactions after we finally switched back to the real us, making all the posts hilariously funny. one common mutual thought that was was going on was that we had logged into each other's accounts. another was like ahh i got you. x is pretending to be y and y is [etc etc], getting it all wrong and we were like ah yes! you got us! so true!. i think @thirteens-earring still hates us for may 16.... we were sending each other messages being like hi v this is rory! etc and v eventually figured out who was who but the whole time was sending us murderous threats + at one point luna was like hi rory this is v! to v, which was funny. anyway i think lizzie @dionysuswearsanorangetracksuit was the first one to catch on what was going on (like super early that day) and texted me and h about it but i made them promise they wouldn't explain to everyone what was going on.

everyone was like ah hahah ha hilarious right. you guys are done right. no really. you are done right. please please say you're done. and so, this is what we did after:

3. phase 3 prep: rory and luna collected the best posts through screenshots, i opened photoshop with a normal canvas size and started adding them and making the canvas bigger and bigger, ending up with a photoshop file of 16359x22200 pixels, it took me and rory 2 computers, 3 photoshop versions, and about 1 hour to export that as 4 pngs.

4. phase 3: on may 17 we changed all our blog titles to "phase 3", posted that image, and everyone was like hey guys. whats phase 3 whats going on pls explain. and to this day no one knows what phase 3 is <3 we will not say unless someone guesses

anyway if you've read all this thank you so much in indulging me and listening to me talk nonsense about friendship shenanigans (<- idk how to spell in english but i might have gotten it right). it was truly a wild time where rory was normal and luna and i were unhinged and drove rory into our unhingeness. i miss it incredibly and i wanna do more of that with you and them and all my little computer friends. or maybe we could jsut have a sleepover. idk but all i know is that if i knew you all in real life we would have the best laughs and the best times of our lifes and we'd just have so much fun. like if all of you bring this much joy in my life just by resharing the same posts as each other and replying to each other, imagine what it would feel like if we could all have a picnic or a roadtrip or just a day out at the mall even.... anyway this is getting sappy and i need to go to bed. ty for reading or sorry!!!!! now that we're friends i'll invite you next time we plan an international cyber-prank

HELLO OKAY !!!! apologies 2 my followers in advance but i need to immortalise this bc truly. this is the pinnacle of careful throughtful tomfoolery i'm very impressed

first off i'm all for the resuscitation of mika discord there really are sooo few of us on here !! mouaylor collab would be incredible and i need to see this shirts if they exist lmfao. also doing this while moving u are SO STRONG thats incredible !!!

anyways again the amount of thought that went into this.....the reblogged posts the turning off web view the following each others mutuals.....i would trust u to pull of a heist i think. sounds like a wild day and yesss would love to participate in international cyber pranks or sleepovers (or both simultaneously) w u all !!! truly i think that we'd have the most wonderful time if we knew each other irl the shenanigans and vibes would be unmatched <3 (i am living in constant fear of phase 3 now. its gonna haunt my every click on this site)

[7vsjr]

can i request one with Andy Robertson please where he has a huge crush on one of the girls who works at the club (and she's crushing on him too) and eventually after loads of teasing from the lads, he plucks up the courage to ask her out? then it ends in smut? Thank you! x

(Ignore my other request I forgot to add in the smut bit)

OBBESSED

summary; andy is obbesed with you but doesnt have the courage to talk to you. but when trent approaches you and tells you about andy, everything changes.

content; SMUT, unprotected sex, slight teasing, kinda getting caught, shy andy😭

a/n; heyy make sure you request things!! love yall 💟‼️

every day for the past 2 months, andy visited you at the club you worked at. and yet 2 months and he still hadnt worked up the courage to ask for your name. “mate go talk to her” trent bumped his shoulder. he contemplated actually doing it or not.

“nah mate i cant” he say running his hand over his face. “oh my days” trent groaned and stood up. andy watched him walk over to you. trent pointed at andy and you smiled. you nodded and made your way over to him. “hi” you said at sat down in front of him.

andy gulped, fuck you looked so good. if he really wanted to, he wouldve ripped it off in front of everyone. “andy?” you asked him cutting him away from his thoughts. “oh uhm yeah” he stuttered. “your friend said you wanted to talk” andy mentally cursed at trent, “not really” lie. he knew he wanted to talk to you.

“oh. ok” you frowned softly and left. “mate what the fuck!” trent said. andy ignored him and went chasing after you. “wait!” he yelled after you. you turned around. “what” you said. “im sorry. i do wanna talk. ugh its just that-“ andy stopped talking. he replaced his words with his lips. he wrapped his hands around your waist. you wrapped yours around his neck. “shit! im so sorry” andy stuttered as he pulled away. “for what?” you smiled, your cheeks as pink as the pink roses on the table next to you.

andy was about to speak before you let out a soft giggle and walked away. he wanted to follow you, he really did but he couldnt. he was too shocked that you liked him. he figured you must’ve liked trent instead of him.

he saw you walk over to trent and gave him a note. trent looked at andy and smirked. “what?” andy said running over. “she gave you her address!” he smiled. holy shit, really?

“shit.. i gotta go” andy said and ran out the door. “oi wait!” trent yelled but andy already slammed the door shut. he got in his car and immediately drove to you.

when he got to your house, he pounded on the door. “hi-“ you said but got caught off when andy kissed you. it was a long and passionate kiss. when he pulled away he said, “hey” and smiled. you licked your lips and moved away from the door.

andy never looked at what you were wearing, which was practically nothing. just a bra and panties. “baby what are you wearing?” he asked you. “oh uhm im so sorry! you caught me at a bad time…” you mumbled. pretty soon andy caught on. “were you touching yourself?” he asked.

he figured you were as all the pillows on the couch were fixed in a specific position, and your legs and quite frankly whole body looked damp.

“maybe” you smiled. “let me help” andy said. and in almost seconds, he was on top of you on your bed. “are you gonna be good and take it?” he asked you as he slapped his dick on your pussy. you moaned and nodded. once andy started pushing into you, you found yourself biting your lips. “shit your so fucking tight” he moans at the feeling. you grabbed his body and held him for support.

once he was fully in, you begged him to move. he just smiled at you and slowly starting increasing his speed. “oh fuck!” you moaned but it almost came out as a scream when he hit a certain soft spot.

“baby i cant last with your beautiful noises” he groaned. “fuck andy im close” you moaned out and shut your eyes in pleasure. “not yet” was all he said. “please andy” you moaned as you begged him to let you cum. “patience. you’ve already cum once” andy said referring to you before he arrived. “wait until i fill you” he moaned out.

when andy came inside of you, you had never been so impatient for a head nod. but that head nod secured an okay to let go. and you did.

“shit” you panted. “fuck that was amazin” andy laughed slightly. “so..” you mumbled. “do you wanna go out to dinner?” he asked you. but he knew he was only hungry for one thing. you.

a/n; srry this took soo long nd its so bad😭

[iamindebt]

Dussekar is an enegmatic and strange character, shrouded in mystery

[LONG POST INCOMING] [[like its massive]]

1st off, tell me if he EVER, at all , ONCE actively helps you

Chapter 1, Otempes does most of it

Chapter 2, Wiscara tags alongside you to take her scissors back and beats up herbrother ro do so

Chapter 3 you just go with Otempes, but THIS is when you meet Dussekar

Chapter 4 is primarily a solo mission, with Wiscara telling you where to go

Chapter 5 everyone tags along, EXCEPT Dussekar (put a pin in that for me)

Chapter 6, Tucker (who does not need to help) convinces you to take a more active approach instead of waiting for a problem to occur and then solving it (see chapters 1, 2, and 4)

Chapter 7 Base cleph and Otempes solve this, you coming along because Claire told you too.

Chapter 8 EVERYONE gets involved

...yeah hes not the defenition of a "team player".

2nd, Dussekar is just some guy, just some guy that got what he wanted because of a likely meaningless task

3rd, he seems to be apathetic or blatantly NOT CARE about scriptliss despite saying that he does. (put a note about the "apathetic part")

(from chapter 4)

D: ...So you have no idea who released you?

S: N-no... I couldnt see behind me because my entire body was chained... I have no idea who cut the chains either

(Dussekar glances to the paper ball chained to scriptliss's ankle)

D: Hmm... well it seems they missed a chain. And the clamp is tightly secured. Does it hurt to walk?

S: N-n-no... *sniff*

D: Whats the matter?

S: It's just that *sniff* You knew i was chained up... Didnt you?

D: Well... not quite. I heard some rumors. I knew your general whereabouts, but i had no idea you were actually chained up...

D: Im sorry for not going to check up on you sooner. I figured that, wherever you were, you'd be fine on your own.

S: But *sniff* Thats how we lost 1x1x1x1 to the void, too. You assumed that he was safe enough on his own...

D: Hey, can we change the subject? The protagonist is right over there.

S: Oh, hi! Didn't see you over there, Protagonist. Were're just chill out here. Isn't that right Dussekar?

D: Absolutely frigid.

S: Hah! What a Dussekar. Always cracking jokes.

(Nice save)

D: (Shhhh. Put a lid on it.)

This shows us a lot about the characters. Dussekar knew about rumors, meaning he forgot or didnt care to check on Scriptliss, who was IN HIS. WASTEBASKET.

Scriptliss does actually bring this up in their conversation (see red text), instead of confronting this or apologising for it, he changes the subject, focusing on protag.

Once scriptliss notices this he seems a lot more extroverted and friendly from his demeanor not even 5 seconds ago. Most likely scriptliss does not want anyone to find out what happened in pr2 but he does bring up some very good points.

There was no reason Dussekar should not have been able to check in on Scriptliss. Hes immortal, Dussekars immortal, his wastebasket is RIGHT THERE.

(seriously buddy, you cant spend 5 minutes to attempt to reconcile with you only remaining friend? he seems very willing now)

4th

(i would rewrite lanter and dussekars entire conversation but thats like rewriting the bloody bee movie script)

L: ...Are you even listening to yourself? You sound more like a tyrant than the god who you vanquished centuries ago. Just because someone stole your precious little plaything doesn't mean you have to fight so hard to get it back

D: The plotbook isnt a "plaything" its the reality we live in.

L: You truly are no different then the ancient gods who fought to protect everything they ruled over. Have you ever considered that Antagon might just be repeating your own history?

D: well, if you disagree with his actions as much as you disagree with mine, Why dont you go stop him yourself?!

L: Thats not the point. The point is, You need to see your actions from a different perspective before you draw definitive conclusions on people

D: Im well aware of how my actions affect others. I don't need anyone reminding me what the consequences of my actions are. I know exactly what ive done.

L: Alright then. What are you finally gonna do when you finally catch antagon? Surely your not going to send him to banland, are you? Hes just a kid, you know. Until recently, hes been living with his mother. What are you going to do then?

D: ...........

L: Hes just a younger version of you. Are you going to lash out at him when you finally get the plot book back?

D: ..............

L: Well?

idk man dussekar definitely looked like he was considering it. Its bad for antagon because hes a CHILD but its worse for scriptliss because hes immortal. like c'mon dude this is greek mythology levels of punishment.

why did he not try to revive tretone or tess,

major L moment right there

TLDR:

Dussekar as a character seems to show that he does not care about his old friend and has no issues with sending anyone he disagrees with to infinity jail.

it gets better after apologising about screaming at antagon and talking to scriptliss though :thumbs_up:

[sleepyheadd0]

pat pat pat!! they are so silly!!! picasso!!!!!!!!

...more stuff about picasso please?? im not really sure what to ask exactly,, but i genuinely want to learn more they're so silly!!!!!! /gen!!

oh my god im so sorry about this taking so long

the tmnt au comp gave me motivation to post about picasso lmfao

SO. picasso backstory.

the very beginning starts after the episode "Sparring Partner", S1 E18B, where we are introduced to Franken-Foot; the reformed paper ninja in raphael's care. after meeting the reformed paper ninja, mikey has an idea. at this point, hes still very babied and coddled; although now he is feeling bolder, with both "Hot Soup: the Game" and "Nothing but Truffle" already having occurred.

seeing raphael being able to reform one if their "enemies", mikey decided to replicate it, for the sake of showing raphael up and proving he can be responsible. so, after yet another battle with the foot clan, mikey slipped away to pluck an injured paper ninja out of the heap of paper after the dust settled.

the paper ninja was in bad shape, to say the least; especially after mikey had to drag it back into his room with his brothers none the wiser. after all, paper isnt exactly the strongest material on its own. but mikey knew exactly what to do, he knew how to make paper stronger. he was the artist, after all! he worked with paper a lot, unlike raphael. and his plan? paper mache.

he slowly but surely fixed the paper ninja up, it took a few days with all of the drying, hiding the living behind from his brothers, all that jazz. but if course, he didnt want to make just another paper ninja, thats boring. he needed to add his own razzmatazz to it! so, using his skills, he created his own turtle pal; complete with a painted cardboard shell.

now, this paper mache turtle wasnt exactly the strongest thing. with all of that weight, it needed something to keep it together! so mikey wrapped ribbons around its limbs, adding an extra layer of protection.

but of course, someone was going to find this out eventually. one day, while mikey was out spray painting the sewers, leo snuck into his room to grab one of his comics he let mikey borrow. only to find a strange colored turtle reading it.

mikey made leo swear to keep it a secret, but after just a week or so, leo spilled the beans to april, who brought it up with donnie assuming he knew. and finally after a month or so, raphael finally learned of the paper mache turtle when it was just walking around. mikey got in deep trouble that day.

once the family finally all knew of the paper mache turtle, it began to join them in their family time at home. its vocabulary expanded, and became almost like a toddler. donnie had some theories, but none were fully solid.

eventually, the paper mache turtle began to notice it was different from the others. no flesh or skin or scales, it was all paper mache. it felt alienated from its family. although, this didnt stop the paper mache turtle from trying to cheer itself up. so when mikey went into his room one day, he saw the paper mache turtle superglueing paper loops on the back of its head to replicate the brothers bandannas / masks.

OKAY THATS ALL I HAVE ABOUT PICASSOS BACKSTORY

but more on other things, picasso uses any/all pronouns, because as paper, they couldnt care less what you refer to them as. mikey is essentially picassos older brother/father figure, taking his toddler creation out into the sewers to teach it things.

while picasso doesnt know much about the world, he isnt a complete idiot. he may be comedically bad at using things when hes first introduced to them, but he eventually learns, like a toddler.

picassos "weapon" of choice is a fork. it was originally a dumb idea my irl friend cane up with, i actually like this idea.

so. mikey spends a lot of time in the kitchen, and picasso follows him because hes her caretaker. she watches him cooking a lot, and she also helps by passing mikey some ingredients or tools for him to use. when she saw that mikey also used a fork a lot to eat, test the readiness if potatoes, whisk together eggs, etc., she decided shed use a fork for everything, just like her caretaker and best friend mikey.

this au is also completely platonic, and picasso is aroace.

thanks for letting me ramble! im thinking of calling this au "paper mache ninja turtle ", or pmnt!

[1-800-c0sm1c]

꒰you get me so high !꒱

your old best friend (whom you very much still have feelings for)  is the last person you were hoping to see when you get into trouble in avidya forest.

character x scholar!gn!reader

includes tighnari !

warnings : none.

word count : 3914

a/n : sorry for being inactive ! i just got back from an mcr concert recently so i wrote the last half of this exhausted, i hope its coherent still ! i am so very normal about this fox boy (lying).

youre not sure whether youre just abnormally clumsy, or dangerously stupid, but tighnaris best guess is a little bit of both. 

you should know better than to walk around the rainforest by yourself, its common knowledge, but you were far too stubborn to listen to anyone elses warnings before you set out on your travels this morning. the most embarrassing part was that you didnt even find the items you needed for your latest research project for the akademiya before you wound up in trouble. 

you had made the rookie mistake of wandering away from the designated path throughout the deep forest, and before you knew it you had tripped and found yourself caught in some vines. no big deal, at least at first. attempting to free yourself, you found the hold around your body had become tighter instead of loosening up, and at that moment, you had realized youd fucked up.

the thorns had begun pricking into the skin of your arms and legs, and you cursed yourself for wearing a short sleeved shirt and shorts. you finally managed to swallow your pride and call for help, praying that you wouldnt draw attention to any hungry animals in the nearby area.

not too far away, a familiar pair of ears perked up at the sound of your distressed voice, making a quick pace over to where you were, quite literally, screaming from. although tighnari knew it was you the second he heard you, he still couldnt help but feel slightly shocked at seeing you in person again. he cant recall how long its been since you were studying side by side at the akademiya.

"alright y/n you can relax. struggling will only make the vines tighter, as youve clearly already figured out, and your screaming really hurts my ears." your eyes widen at the figure standing in front of you. out of everyone who could have stumbled upon you in the forest, tighnari was the last person you were hoping to see.

"oh.. hi tighnari. uhm, fancy meeting you here, huh?" you awkwardly laugh, hoping he doesnt ask you for an explanation before helping you out of your predicament. he raises an eyebrow at you. "any particular reason youre so far off from the designated trail? i thought something so obvious could get through your thick skull, but i guess i was wrong." you cant help but scoff at his comment, he hadnt changed a bit.

"you can lecture me all you want, but can you at least help me out of here first?" he sighs before examining the root of the vines, presumably figuring out how to free you while damaging the least amount of the forest possible. he looks at you for a moment, silently asking if its alright for him to touch you, and when you nod your head you feel his gloved hand firmly wrap around your upper arm. "your muscles are too tense, relax them." he states. you try to let go off all the tension in your body, but when you do you only feel the thorns dig deeper into your skin. you can begin to feel blood drip down your limbs.

tighnari gently unwraps the vines from around your arms, being careful to not rip the thorns from out of your skin. he places them on the ground next to you, before kneeling in front to unwrap the ones around your legs as well. youre not sure why, but something about the position change makes this whole situation just that more flustering, and you try your best to hide your red face from him. of course he notices it, but he simply assumes its just from embarrassment and continues his work.

after all the vines have been unwrapped from your body, tighnari grabs your hand and leads you back towards the path. he mentioned something along the lines of "not trusting you to walk behind him without getting into more trouble" under his breath as you walked back to the ranger station.

you cant stand the awkward air between you two, and casually ask "what were you doing all the way out here, anyway?" without even looking back at you tighnari quickly responds with "its my job as a forest ranger to patrol these areas, is it not?" ah right, you probably could have guessed that. you mentally beat yourself up for that one. but although tighnari seemed uninterested, hell never grow tired of your seemingly stupid questions, despite yourself being a scholar, he finds it amusing. a cute smile is secretly on his face the rest of the journey.

upon arriving, tighnari leads you to his workshop, and instructs you to sit on the lone bed while he fetches the remedies for your wounds. you glance around the room, there isnt much personality in the decor but you suppose theres only so much you can do while in the middle of avidya forest.

not long after tighnari has returned with supplies in hand, and silently begins work on patching you up. you feel small under his stern gaze, and eventually opt to staring at the floor like its the most interesting thing in the room. both of you can sense the tension, but whether its not commented on because of fear or stubbornness is a question that may never be answered, no matter how many knowledge capsules one may use.

you hiss when tighnari applies ointment to some of the deeper cuts, and he fights back the urge to apologize. of course its going to hurt, its stupid to even try to comment on it, he thinks. but he still finds himself muttering a soft "sorry" under his breath as his cheeks grow slightly red. he tries his best to ignore it, the awkwardness is all in his head anyways, after all.

"how humiliating to be made of flesh, am i right?" you notice tighnaris ears slightly twitch at your statement. "what do you mean?" he refuses to meet your gaze, for fear his face will end up warmer. you hesitate before answering, "well, for starters, you finding me like that in the forest was not how i expected us to meet again" you both feel your body slightly tense up again, talking about how you felt was never really a common occurrence between you two even when you were close. feelings only get in the way, its the research that matters at the end of the day. a bit of a stupid rhyme but you and tighnari were even more foolish to believe it.

tighnari debates on if what you said is even worth commenting on. nobody necessarily wants to be found like that, but hes not sure how he feels about it being you of all people that he stumbled upon. he refuses to ponder about it any longer and instead, he silently nods his head, before entirely ignoring what you said and letting out a forced laugh. "you know, that other line you said is probably the smartest thing ive heard from you." you pout slightly at his words.

hes not the easiest person to talk to when its not about botany, you know this, but you cant help but feel that maybe your time apart had finally changed that aspect of tighnari, especially since its what you hated the most about him. 

he was so incredibly observant, his ears definitely helping with that, but yet he had an awful time reading the room, specifically when it came to you. or, more accurately, he chose to ignore any lingering thoughts, for reasons youre unsure youd be able to understand.

tighnari, on the other hand, disliked your stubbornness. he wishes you would at least listen to all his warnings about the forest, since its what he knows most about, but yet you would (and still do, apparently) wave off his words, invalidating not only his knowledge, but him. hes not sure how you havent gotten yourself killed yet, but deep down hes glad youre managing to stay alive somehow, even if its off of spite alone. 

that, and of course he wishes you would just ignore the tense atmosphere like he does, so you can both save your breath. many were surprised you had managed to find a friend in tighnari, as not many were able to say the same. they claim that opposites attract, and that couldnt be more and less true at the same time.

back then you both knew that something had grown between you, and yet you both refused to let it blossom for reasons the other cant comprehend. tighnari pretended the feeling wasnt there, inevitably drowing himself in research instead, and you werent going to be the person to say something first, so instead of something more, you had both ended up silently resenting each other. the longer this continued the more strain was put on your rocky relationship. when tighnari had announced he was leaving the akademiya, you had hit a stalemate. 

you assumed that the first night he was gone youd sleep better than you had in the entire time youd known him, but unfortunately you had found yourself unable to sleep. tighnari was usually there to the rescue when your insomnia was at its worst. but he was long gone now, and that was when you regretted holding in your thoughts before he left.

you swore the next time youd see him, youd either have finally moved past your emotions, or have the guts to tell him the truth. now that you had finally meet again, you wanted to scream at yourself for accomplishing neither.

shortly after, tighnari finished dressing your wounds, and mumbled a "finished" under his breath. he takes a seat on the bed next to you, silently stretching his back and neck. before you even notice what youre doing your hand finds itself stroking the base of one of tighnaris ears. your brain is on autopilot at this point, and you wish you could blame your actions on the medicine. 

tighnari was hyper aware the second you touched him, and he almost pushed you off the bed and yelled at you with how sudden your actions were. almost. he noticed the glazed look in your eyes, and he feels a little guilty for not connecting the dots earlier. youre exhausted, the stress from today seeming to be almost too much for you. so tighnari decides hell let you continue, since its so very obvious that you need it and he absolutely doesnt.

by the time you realize what youre doing tighnari is a flustered mess, a deep blush all across his face and neck. you can see his tail swishing behind him and him holding back any noises he might accidentally make like his life depended on it. you immediately retract your hand and he puts a hand over his mouth to muffle the whine that leaves him after you pull away. hes not sure if hes ever been this embarrassed in his life. 

"s-sorry. force of habit, i guess." you apologize, and tighnari refuses to meet your gaze. "its…. fine. you already know i dont mind if its you." he almost dies on the spot after his own words process in his head. hes immediately sputtering out "because we were close friends and all! and… i dont mind if its…ugh…" he facepalms, this is exactly what he was trying to avoid. you know he didnt mean to, but those words made you feel a pain in your heart nonetheless. were close friends, but not anymore. you knew it was true, but it felt taboo to even mention it.

what were his feelings toward you the entire time tighnari had been helping you? sure, you hadnt ended on good terms but he certainly wouldnt have come to your aid if he hated you, would he? he was all the more hard to read when hed trip over his words like this, tall ears falling flat.

desperate to change the subject, he glanced outside to see the setting sun, and swallowed his pride to ask you to stay for the night. "its late, you know. i think its best you stay here until morning if youre comfortable with that." you were now sure that the plant from earlier had killed you, there was no way he was seriously asking that, was he? you squeak out an "okay", surely the akademiya will understand why your research was a day late.

"i will… leave you to rest now. goodnight." tighnari stands up awkwardly, before beginning to walk out of his workshop. you quickly grab his hand to stop him and he looks back, confused. "why are you in such a rush? we havent caught up in ages, you know. surely im not boring you that much, am i?" he stares at you for a moment, before silently sitting back down next to you on the bed.

he sighs. "you should also know then, that im not the most interesting person to talk to." "oh im more than aware." you snicker when he glares at you. "so what is it then?" tighnaris not dumb, hes known you had something on your mind since the moment you met eyes in the forest. but now that youve been the one to further push the conversation, he doesnt feel as scared about continuing it.

he cant help but roll his eyes when you respond with "oh, i have no idea." he refuses to let you back down. "dont give me that. if you have something to say, you should just say it now and get it over with." you laugh sarcastically at his comment. "thats rich coming from you… but yeah, i suppose youre right. nothing good is going to come from keeping it in." 

you take a deep breath in, and look towards him. "i just want to apologize." okay, now hes confused. "youre sorry? sorry about what?" "im sorry for the way i acted when you left. for just… completely brushing off our entire friendship simply because…. forget it, it doesnt matter." 

out of everything you could have said, an apology was not on tighnaris bingo card. it was scarily uncharacteristic of you to apologize, especially to him. plus, this had happened who knows how long ago, so did it really even still matter? "i dont understand why youre bringing this up now. if youve felt guilty this entire time… than perhaps it is me who should be sorry."

you shake your head. "no, its because of my own dumb ego that i couldnt be honest with you. truthfully, even just admitting to that makes me feel a little sick, but i dont want it to plague my mind anymore, and hopefully it hasnt been bothering you." tighnari almost cant believe what hes hearing. your attitude has changed drastically since when you had first arrived, and your words are giving him whiplash. 

he ponders for a momemt before responding. "well, to be quite honest, i cant say ive thought about it much in recent years." ouch. "but i know its far out of your comfort zone to admit youre wrong, so… even though i dont find it to be a big issue, i accept your apology." silence fills the air, and none of the tension from earlier has dissipated. its thick enough to be cut with the dullest of knives. you feel defeated.

"was there… anything else you wanted to tell me?" yes, but the words die in your throat. tighnari decides to take a leap of faith. "well, im sure youve noticed it too, but… i can sense some… lingering feelings." you sigh. "of course ive noticed. but youre insane if you thought i was going to bring that up." he plans his next words carefully. "is that because it had something to do with… the reason why we ended on bad terms?" he sees your body tense up again, and nows the first time hes realized how intense your heartbeat is.

you turn away from him before answering. "what are you implying?"  "oh, i dont know.. maybe resentment? or perhaps… infatuation?... no, actually. id assume a little bit of both." you whip your head back towards him. "...what makes you say that?" he casually shrugs, despite the blush on his face becoming increasingly noticeable again. "lucky guess? obviously i was just assuming the feeling was mutual. you dont think were that different, do you?" he retorts. you sigh. "no, i suppose not." finally, some progress. the path up to this point was rocky, but this was something you both could work with.

“well, your assumption was… correct.” you mumble under your breath, almost completely forgetting about the fox ears decorating tighnaris head. “hmm… are you sure? you didnt sound too sure of yourself there. perhaps this hypothesis needs further testing before we can draw a conclusion, what do you say?” you roll your eyes at him. “how very amusing it is to use my work against me, it makes me want to puke.” there was an unfamiliar glint in tighnaris eyes. youre not completely sure when it first appeared, and perhaps that was a mistake on your part for giving him the upperhand in the single handedly most important conversation you two have ever had.  however you both had already come so far, so you decided to let him keep up his act. after all, you know hes never been much of a charmer, so why not see how far hell take it? 

“oh? youre feeling sick now? are you sure this isnt just a ploy for me to stay longer? youre  at least clever enough to know you dont have to lie to me to get me to pay attention to you.” however, who said tighnari was going to have all the fun? “now we both know thats not true. after all youre the one who agreed to stay to begin with, so why would i pull a stunt to further it? you clearly have no intention of leaving now.”

the atmosphere was slowly starting to become more bearable, even if only by a little bit. youre 99% sure that its the homemade medications alone that are fueling the fire in you right now, that and the cute fox boy in front of you and… hold up what are you even saying? this however, is completely unlike tighnari, to be so forward, and you can only assume its because hes finally let his guard down enough for the first time since he stumbled across you this morning. its dangerous, the way youre making him feel right now. it all feels too sudden and not quick enough at the same time. was he growing impatient? or falling farther and farther behind?

he was a fool to ever be honest with you, is what he would have said only hours ago. but now, for the first time in forever, tighnari doesnt know what to think. hes saying and acting in a way he never would, especially in front of a friend- if he was even still allowed to call you that. but the best part about no longer being friends is there is no worry of ruining the relationship if it didnt exist to begin with. that was how he justified himself, nothing to lose and everything to gain, it was all going almost too perfect. his body was on fire, and if he werent inside he would have assumed he was (somehow) overheating.

“you are right about one thing.” tighnari starts, hes staring directly at you, his intense gaze leaving you feeling unfairly flustered. “that im not going anywhere this time.” you raise an eyebrow. “this time? are you suggesting that… you dont want to go back to being strangers?” he almost wants to laugh at your question, but one look at the scared look on your face and he drops any hints of a smirk immediately. “oh come on y/n, does this erase your doubts?” before you even realize whats happening, tighnaris hand is gently holding your face, caressing your cheek. he glances at your lips, then back towards your eyes. before he gets the chance to ask first, you quickly stutter out, “c-could you kiss me?”  tighnari leans in closer, until your lips are directly on his. as soon as its begun, its over, and he is yet again staring drunkenly into your eyes that you notice have been glossed over for the majority of the time hes been sitting closely next to you.

“are you positive youre really tighnari and im not just asleep right now? because this is exactly how i had pictured this going in a dream, not just your casual weekday… or weeknight, i guess i should say.” he shakes his head with a sly smile on his face. “if it were a dream i bet wed both be way less nervous.” “good point. but do you have to keep staring at me like that?” you hide your flustered face in your hands. “like what?” tighnari asks, back to his completely unaware self. “like… like youre in love or something!” he lets out a laugh that was unreasonably cute. “confidence. dare i say its even more valuable to me right now than a knowledge capsule is to… well you. it just took something to finally ignite it i suppose.” “well im glad thats all it was, for a second there i was thinking you were secretly taking shots while i wasnt looking.” you laugh. “that could have worked too, ill have collei remind me to pick up some alcohol the next time i head into sumeru city.” “make sure you stop by the akademiya to share a glass with me if you do!”  “oooh, drinking on the jobs not a very good look for a scholar now, dont you think?” you playfully slap his shoulder. “thats not what i meant! just come by during a break!” 

the silence that fell over you two was different this time, it was comfortable. you found yourself resting your head on tighnaris shoulder. hes the first to break the silence. “so i guess this means we can start talking again?” “more than just that. dont you think we owe it to ourselves at this point? think about it, this whole time we were both living with this regret and just… chose not to acknowledge it! im no doctor, but i dont think thats good for our health.” he chuckles. “well i cant argue with that. although i will mention i didnt hear an actual confession of undying love from you yet.” “oh, is that what you were expecting? good luck with that. lets just be glad we got this far.” he pouts at your words. “you mean i went through all of this and i cant even get an “i like you, tighnari”?” 

you sigh extra dramatically, and lift your head off his shoulder. holding his face in between both your hands, staring at him the same way he did to you earlier. “i like you, tighnari. a lot, way more than younger me would ever admit to. and im thankful for whatever force of nature that brought us together again.” you place a gentle kiss to his nose, and he stops you from pulling away to kiss you properly.

tighnaris been unsure about many things today, but one thing for certain is you get him higher than any psychedelic mushroom he could stumble upon in avidya forest.

inspired by you get me so high by the neighbourhood , give it a listen if you havent before !

[fcknstar]

,, arrest me, major "

valerian x gen!reader

a.n. ive been vv addicted to the idea of valerian being vv needy but dominant, m gonna write it soon. i love love this cause i imagined this when i was abt to sleep. DANE DEHAAN BDAY AHAHA!! my taglist.

warnings : suggestive ending.

**lowercase intended**

playing cat and mouse was one of the things you enjoyed a lot. having major valerian chase you like a cat because of how quickly and sneakily you were able to slip into the cracks like a mouse. 

during one of his missions, which included him taking the last pearl from the long destroyed planet mul, he had realized that you switched the actual pearl with a fake one. he noticed how light the pearl was and saw you walking off right after you 'bumped' into him, muttering a quick apology for your clumsiness and handed him the fake pearl. 

" hey " valerian called out to you. but you were too quick, as if you had done this countless times. 

valerian however, was constantly blocked by such ads being popped up by aliens, losing sight of you. 

he knew that if he didnt get the pearl, he would have such consequences. running off to look for lauraline, he panicked. he was not going to mess up on such a simple mission, and there were you, doing exactly just that for him. 

" lauraline, i lost the pearl. im very sorry but there was this girl, beautiful hair and features, bumped into me and literally swapped the actual pearl for a fake one. " he rambled on, showing the fake pearl to lauraline. she couldn't help but sigh and give him a death stare. 

" youve got me to kidding me, valerian? you do know that this mission is incredibly important and you just messed it up big time. "

" yes, m very away of that. thank you very much. " removing the special glasses, looking around in frustration. what caught his eye was that he saw a very familiar figure walking into some type of space ship. it couldnt be. 

" sir, ive got the pearl. " placing the pearl into a confinement. 

" youve done great. i have another mission for you, and then you are free to do whatever you like until the next one. " your sir informed, letting you prepare your mind mentally for the next mission. 

walking into your room, you sighed. ' god, i cant wait to have a break.. ' you thought. 

placing yourself under a memory watcher that replays your recent memory, you tried to see whether you went wrong somewhere and there it is. before you went into the spaceship, you turned around to look at the empty patch behind you. you often walked in without looking behind to ensure no one saw you, but you were sure that you probably attracted a certain someone.

back in alpha, valerian was getting an ear full about how irresponsible he had been during the mission. it was very rare for this to happen, and valerian wasnt having any of it. 

" alex, are you able to detect anything from this pearl. i know its fake but is there anything left behind in that pearl? " 

" collaborating data. it seems like this is just a fake pearl from earth. but there are fingerprints left that doesnt match any of the people here. would you like to find more information, major? " a robotic voice played. 

" yes, alex. " 

" it seems like this is the fingerprint of sergeant marlene monae from cooperate diverse. cooperate diverse is located on the other side of the planet of a thousand cities. " valerian nodded. quickly thanking alex, he got suited up to get the pearl back to its rightful owner. 

taking his skyjet, he skillfully dodged multiple boulders. and by the time he reached cooperate diverse, you had left for your mission way before. 

valerian waited for a right time to slip in, not knowing how advanced the technology is. so when a ship left and opened the gate, valerian quickly slipped into it.

" alex, do you know where marlene is? " he thought itd be better if he were to just confront you, not wanting to attract more attention. 

" 100° from your left, straight down until the big patch of manmade land. then turn to the right and up the lift to level 13. last room to the left. " 

valerian counted himself lucky because no one seemed to be around him, it being very quiet. once he maneuvered through the whole entire cooperation with the help of alex, he saw a figure walking into the said room that was supposedly yours. 

once you pushed the door shut, valerian was quick to stop the door from completely shutting, not daring to move in yet since he didnt know your next move. hearing another door shut, he quickly peeped through and made sure that no one was in sight, before slipping into your room. 

your room was very clean, but too big for his liking. what he learnt about the cooperation is that it was mostly made out of soundproof walls to ensure maximum security of the sharing of conversations and plans. walking around your room, he tried to inspect it, just in case you knew he was coming. 

when valerian was sure that there were no traps, he quickly opened the door to the room where you disappeared to. and there you were, sitting in the chair near your desk peacefully. carefully and quietly walking up behind you, he saw you researching the pearl he thought you still had in your possession. 

“ its beautiful isnt it? “ valerian teased. not expecting anyone behind you, you jumped up in shock. 

“ fuck. “ you muttered. you were right. you messed up. you didnt know how he was able to find you, but whatever it is, you know he wont stop until you surrender. 

“ give it to me back. “ valerian pulled out a gun, not knowing what power that gun holds you hold your hands up. 

“ i dont know what you are talking about..major “ you gave him a smug look.

leaning to the side, he pointed behind you.

“ that. “ 

“ i dont have it. “ 

" dont lie. " valerian advanced towards you. backing up, you realized you were against your desk. 

" its either you give me it, or i do something worse. "  he suggested. 

" what are you going to do? " you laugh breathily. 

" arrest me, major. " you leaned forward, just enough to sense valerian tense up. 

" you know what? i might just do that.. " he whispered, leaning in. 

feeling valerian wrap his arms around your waist, pushing you down onto your desk just enough for you to stabilize yourself. valerians touch made you feel safe, too safe for your liking. it felt like he was able to kill all negativity off, risk himself and the world to save you. valerian then pushed your legs apart and stood in between them to get as close to you as he could. you didnt care whether this was going to be a one night stand. he cared, because he had never seen someone like you, met someone like you, felt someone like you. and just like that, you are the object of his possession and lust. 

his to love, his to care about, his to fuck.

[eirian]

HONESTLY..ive been thinking a lil.

so i started down my path to becoming a professional character designer in 2013, when i designed my very first character who was MEANT to be a character design exercise. i cant exactly remember what prompted me wanting to go into character design--it could have just been that i was passionate about designing characters to the point of where i had looked up if that was a job or not--but it had become such a passion of mine that i would go on to study and practice character design for like 10 years afterward.

in 2018 i started to take this career path more seriously by enrolling in stephen silver's schoolism class, the fundamentals of character design. this was significant for me because stephen was at the time a very recent idol of mine and i admired his abilities--plus this would count as my first "formal" character design learning experience. i didnt feel very good after taking the class; it was critiqued, and i kind of got ripped into lol. but after i recovered, i didnt give up and just worked harder, eventually taking his second class a couple years later. that time i did pretty well and i came out feeling like i was finally ready to apply to jobs in the industry!

unfortunately, erm...the job hunting was not only Not a success, but it only served to kind of kill my passion for character design. every time i applied i was rejected and every critique i asked for gave me something new i had to do differently. one critique in particular hurt me a lot and killed my passion for art overall (obviously not completely, i have the art autism so i could never fully fall out of love for it lol). it got to the point where last year (2023) i made the decision to give up on character design as a career and just do commissions full time.

dont get me wrong, i am very happy doing commissions as my full time job!!! i love drawing people's blorbos :]...but also, its a very inconsistent income, and theres been a couple months where i couldnt make rent without help, and that doesnt feel good at all.

so ive been thinking. i dont rly wanna go back to the industry--it still feels bad to me and right now it seems as though the industry is not in a great environmental situation anyway, so i dont wanna even attempt to try getting a job there again. however........i was honestly reconsidering if i had actually lost the passion for character design because it just genuinely wasnt my true passion, or if i had only lost it because the industry killed it. and i think the conclusion i came to was that yeah it was the industry's fault that made me fall out of love with it because it made me feel like i was doing everything wrong and nobody would like my design style.

so now my thought is like...maybe i dont HAVE to work in the industry to be a professional character designer? sure itd be AMAZING for my work to be on like. cartoon network or something. but i dont think i Have to work at a studio to be happy in that career path?? like..idk. maybe i can be a freelancer or something. if an industry opportunity shows itself i dont think i'll decline, but i wont actively seek them out anymore.

its just that i feel like ive put too much work and time and money and effort and passion into character design yknow? i dont feel right anymore just letting the industry kill that passion. i wanna reignite it and use the knowledge and skills ive gained over the 10 years ive been working at it to make a good living for myself. yeah itd be great to get guild pay lol, but if i can just...figure out how to do freelance character design work, then i think it can be just as good and fulfilling

sorry for the long post i just needed to air some thoughts out as usual <33 i guess this does show that character design still is my passion LOL i talked so fucking much about it after all. if u have any thoughts to share feel free i guess

[metavandetta23]

nobody is going to read this, so I am just gonna put it out there warning: rambling from some fucking guy ever. you have been warned.

life sucks, blah blah blah, but instead of just complaning about that, how about I give you bit explenation as to why. so sit down there one of my 121 followers. If anyone of you read that is and not just clicked follow on one art I made and buzzed off (no offense there, just saying.) Okay so you might ask, why now out of sudden i blow like up that. Here is the answer: See, I have been doing creative stuff like, be it art, writing, music or whatever for past..... lets say 4-5 years. As you might guess, some of these ventures didnt pan out in the end. i mean, its given. It happens. Let me mention some of the things I tried over the years. I tried making a homestuck comic on mspa when I first started doing creative stuff. I managed to get pretty far compared to most projects I will mention, but I didnt finish in the end. Why? I got burned out, because I worked on it full non stop. Then I tried having a cool rp campagin session with pals from discord server I known. That ended in tragedy, especially after one of them out of fucking blue, send a fucking gore of dead person. None of us expected this to happen. Earlier I tried music, couldnt do that thing earlier unless you call "music" by swapping midis with shitty piano font. Well, atleast it didnt end up with a gore.

Then I tried working on some ut aus. Did it even work? HAHAHAHAHAHA, what do you think? Ofcourse, not. Didnt peak interest, because I didnt capture interest basically. Anyways this goes on and on. Deltarune au there, some another rp server there and there (one turned into glorified horny rp out of college setting that I tried initially, pal if you are reading this, sorry but this server just sucked ass) I think you might start seeing a pattern here. You would think eventually. That being "Gee meta, thats sure lot of failures, you must have atleast succed one time BIG right?" Haha, no. Okay I did manage to finish some of my stuff but like. really really low bar stuff. so essentially in the eyes for everyone, nothing. See, most of the failures from these projects came from me doing solo. You would think me teaming up with someone would help? Not really, unless I literally pay them money for it, tough fucking luck. Out of 5 years of me doing creative shit, only 4 people helped me out that I recall. they couldnt helped me out for long in the end, but i appreciated for them when they could. all rest of people? Fucking went ghost and then I was left alone, figuring this shit out myself. It isnt fun knowing that you put trust in someone, only in the end to be alone in this in the end. I wish I was so fucking talented, creative, witty or self efficent as the people i asspire to, the artists i admire who make works of artm writers who can write witty, fun but touching stories. I wish I could be at thier level, so I could make great works of art. But atlas, I am not. I dont seek glory or fame, even if it would be nice. No, I just want people to enjoy creating what I make, to feel like I have impact on the world, that people can share with. to make connections with. Look in the end I am just 20 year old guy from europe, that isnt much good at anything, including social life, apperantly. Only thing I am good at is pixel art, but just barely. I am very much uncreative person. and unconfident and rather hopeless one these days, despite how much I try to hide in fake smiles.

I dont have much better way to end this sort of ramble, besides mentioning tobys recent post from spring newslettter and my view on it. "There's times where it feels like your hopes and dreams are simply slipping away from you. That the things you wanted to achieve are floating away from you in the sky while you lie there, fallen in a crater, your wing torn off, never to grow back. Bitterness grows, and you feel like you may never leave the ground again.

But

That's not true.

You can still fly.

Even if you lose a piece of yourself, even if it feels like you can't get up anymore, you can. You can fly with one wing. You can fly without any wings."

Can you really even fly, even if you feel like a part of yourself was torn off? That it happened right before you could even took off. No matter how much you struggle, scream and rage. You can still never to be able to fly like others, much even take off from ground. No matter how much you try. You feel shackled to ground, to the bones of earth. While you look towards as sky, as other people dance in the air beyond your wildest imagination. Its so beautiful, yet so out of your reach. Cries of helps can be heared coming from you from miles in the air. But they all fall on the deaf ears. Or maybe its just out of bliss ignorance? You cant say. You want to join them, join them so badly. To feel like you could finally be a part of something greater. To feel like you could belong somewhere. To be cared. But you just cant. It wasnt meant to be made. Resentment grows inside your soul. As that feeling rots inside you more and more. Part of you wishes this feeling to be gone, to never be felt. But the other part, says otherwise. It wants that liberty desperately, looking with its green eyes at them. Why they? Why not me. Why not me at all!?. You just want what they have yourself. It grows inside you more and more as you allow it to. You eventually consdering tearning off other people wings. Even if you cant ever fly agian, doesnt mean you should be the only who suffer like this right? And why do they deserve to fly, anyway. They would be better off without that, you think. Plus, even in this state. You know you can do this option. To cripple someone, just to make yourself feel better even if its only for a moment. But then you realise. If you ever would reach to that point. Whatever drive you initally, would be just gone. In fear of your insecurities and weakness. You decide to lie up, instead. Rendering your shackled and vulerable. Locked inside, with no way or out. Perhpas in the end.... Its better if you dont fly at all...

[tlougayforellie]

Who You’ve become.

Abby x Reader

AU- where You and Abby have created a life together. Raised Lev as your guys son. But her anger and her vengeance against Ellie and Joel cause a divide.

—- sorry if this ass I wrote it quick because I had been thinking about daddy Abby—- not proof read cuz im lazy—-

*mean Abby* *fighting* *mentions of murder* *gay, very gay female reader*

“Abby!” Your voice echoed over the surrounding mountains. You were done with the silent game she was playing with you.

“I swear to fuck-“ you took a moment to think if you really wanted to do this- “I will take my ass back down this mountain and leave you here to wallow in your anger.”

Abby finally stoped, rocks crumbling beneath her feet as she turned to face you. Anger covered her freckled face, it was hard to believe that this was the same freckled face that made you lose your breath.

“Do it, Y/N. See if I give a shit.”

You weren’t sure if was the sudden icy air that stole your breath or Abbys use of your full name. A lump grew in your throat because you knew. You knew that Abby had another teenage girl on her mind.

“Give it up Abby!” Your shaky voice filled the silent mountain yow two stood atop.

Things had shifted between you guys since she found them. Abby had always had revenge on her mind but since killing Joel and breathing the same air as Ellie, she had changed. You wondered if Ellie Williams was doing the same thing to her family that Abby was doing to yours.

“I just- Why? Why!” You screamed at her in anger. Why let her talk? If she wanted to play the silent game then you would speak enough for the both of you.

“She did this!” Abby moved down closer to you, it scared you almost. The anger and swift movements towards you made you cower.

Anger melted into you now, but this anger was for your family not some stupid grudge that you couldnt get over. Abby always wanted to blame someone else, it was never her fault. That made boil over, why couldnt she admit she was the problem?

“Tore us apart? Tore your family apart? that was you Abby. Not Ellie, not Joel. You!”

You wiped away the hot tears that were streaming down your face. Everything revolved around Ellie Williams these days. Ever since that fateful day years ago. And then the fateful day that happened only months ago had refueled the fire you thought was burnt out. But clearly embers still smoldered inside of Abby all these years later.

“She kill-“ You cut Abby off before she could spit out her anger filled speech on the untimely death of her late father. Again she was trying to deflect the blame.

“Don’t. Do not blame this all on her. Your dad died and I’m so fucking sorry, Abigail. But this? This shit with us and Lev thats on you. I just don’t get it. You know you got your damn revenge. You murdered her father figure. Eye for an Eye. Now give it a rest. Why tear your family apart for her? Why can’t you just let her go?”

You stopped to take in Abby’s expression to see if any other emotion was present. You couldn’t see it if it was there. Not only could you feel Abbys tense presence but you could now feel Levs. He must have finally caught up.

Lev had been everything to Abby when you guys had first found him. He quickly and easily fit into the mold of the family you had begun creating with her. But as the months clicked on since the murder of Joel Miller at the hand of your lover, she had become distant. Slowly you and Lev were eating dinner together, slowly you were the only one teaching Lev survival skills and school lessons. Slowly but surely it became Lev, you, and the ghost of Abby.

“Abigail, I feel like you love the idea of Ellie being dead, more than you love Lev and I. And we’re going home now. So come if you want or don’t. we dont care anymore.”

You felt Lev’s small cold hand wrap around yours, something he hadnt done in a long time. His soft sniffles filled the silence between you and Abby. You knew this destroyed him as much as it did you. But you had to do what was best for your family, for him.

You so desperately wanted Abbys face to soften, for her to finally drop the tough girl act. For her to wrap her strong arms around Lev and you again. To feel like a family again. To go home with you guys. To stop being a stranger who lived alongside you and Lev.

“fine.” Her voice was stone cold.

You felt like a bullet had pierced through your heart. Like someone took a bat to your heart and just kept beating it until it was a million different pieces. This wasnt the answer you wanted. But it had been the one you expected. You knew Lev’s heart had shattered too by the way his fingers began to twitch in your hand.

Abby had already began heading back up the mountain. You felt the grip on your hand get tighter as Lev’s small frame tried to yank you in the other direction. Hot tears pooled down your face as you watched Abby walk away. God. You felt like your whole world had fell apart. 19 years old with a 13 year old kid you had chosen to raise with who you thought was your soulmate.

You stumbled back as Lev pulled on your arm. You couldnt let Abby have the last word, not this time. It wasnt about the anger you felt towards her or the pain she caused you hut the pain she caused your guys son.

“You’re just like her!” You yelled out despite the rock in your throat. Abby didn’t even stop, she just kept walking. You knew it stabbed Abby to hear that though. You used her deepest secret against her.

You finally gave into Lev’s tugging and turned back to head down the steep mountain side. You and Lev walked in a somber silence back down the mountain. You weren’t sure what to say to him. Abby and you had raised Lev like he was your own and truly he was your son. and now Abby was walking away. Leaving you as a single parent in this treacherous world.

“Do you think Abby will come back?” Lev’s voice was barely louder than a whisper.

“The only way she’s coming home is in a body bag or until Ellie Williams is dead.”

No other words needed to be spoken. Lev and you had an understanding of the silence you two shared. You had shared years with the family you had made with Abby and Lev. But today leaving the mountain your family divided.

“It’s just you and I again, bud.”

He gripped your hand tighter and you couldnt help but feel his pain too.

[solitarydoomsday]

RAUUUGHHHH BLOCKSTUCK UPDATE FOR 6/12

RAUUUGHHGFHHH THIS HAS BEEN LIKE WAY TOO LONG IN THE MAKIGN BUT I FIGURED AN UPDATE WOULD BE FITTING FOR 6/12!!! its a super short update but i promise i won't leave you guys hanging for 2 years again lmfao. more coming soon!!! >:33

FIRST PAGE: https://mspfa.com/?s=43188&p=1

p.s. explanation for the excruciatingly long hiatus under the cut vv

i feel like i . owe you all an explaination with how long that really took to update. for fuck's sake it's been since april of 2022 since i updated it. i'm not gonna go into too much detail but pretty much Fucking Everything got away from me. that was the year my life kinda went to Shit towards the end and it sparked a really really fucking long depression that i just Couldnt Cope With so i just kind of. rotted. and so did most of my projects.

i'm on antidepressants now though, and i really wanna finish this story, even if it's gonna take me years just to finish one act. i put a *lot* of effort into this just for a simple self insert comic, and even though i don't entirely align with aselus' character anymore, i'm determined to finish what i've started. i still have a story to tell, i still have ideas and dreams for this comic, even if it wasn't initially what i wanted for it. even if it is just, at it's core, a cringy au where my self insert is friends with the main cast of characters. i still love this stupid thing, and i wanna finish it.

*however*,i'm not going to keep up with an "update schedule" anymore. i am, after all, just one guy working on this. it's not like hussie themself had an update schedule anyway. not to mention, i'm making all the music and panels and flashes all by myself, and i am learning how to use half of this shit from *scratch*. the update schedule just adds another layer of stress to the whole ordeal, and i'm not looking to add more stress to my plate with me trying to finish school and get into college early next year. i want this to be fun just as much for me as it is for anybody who decides to read blockstuck. i know that's extremely mushy for a comic like this, but i really do want this to be something i can fondly look back on as something i made that was actually pretty decent.

i already have a backlog of blockstuck panels ready to go, i'm working on one of the first flashes of the whole comic, but i'll start to slowly pump out the rest of what i've been working on when i can or . really even remember.

if you! read this novel of an explaination, thank you for listening to my creator woes, but i hope you can enjoy blockstuck as much as i have making it :) and this is !! hopefully going to be a better "start" than what i already started with.

thanks again to anybody whos stuck with the comic, and also sorry again to hussie for cussing them out when i first started this comic, lmfao. i still hate their guts but i love their work. Guh.

anyways. happy 6/12 everypony

[luffythinker]

THAT ONE ANON BACK AT IT AGAIN! it's almost monday so ima need something to distract me when im in a group session with some guys for work i always use reading your replies to me as so, so have some ships!

MinaTsuyu

It started with Mina whining about how everyone is falling in love and she doesn't know what falling in love is, shes never felt it before TSU keeps asking people out but keeps getting turned down for some reason she isn't sure what it is or that everyone always has someone they like and she isn't it, she starts spending more time with her gal pals Toru Jirou and Mina Mina moreso than others cause everybody is always out with their boo or hanging out with their squads

Mina cant hangout with her squad all the time too much of Bakugo Kaminari Sero and Kirishima in one day is a headache and everyone needs a vacation from that LOVE THEM TO DEATH but ya know sometimes ppl be annoying AF

Tsu aggressively starts having feelings for Mina like she has to abstain herself to have a normal day

Shes watching for any opportunity to be close to her friend

Like she's looking at her differently in a new light she notices how pretty she is, that never used to happen before, if they go to the beach she's fanning herself not from the heat but from how Mina's bikini fits her

(I like to imagine Mina is built Mina is a little on the stubby side but shes got a figure and Tsu is super skinny but semi round hips because frog, so Tsu is tall and skinny while Mina is sort of short and fun shape )

she wants to do more than hug for long periods of time, she wants to hold a women it's Jenny darling your my best friend, im using your shirt as a pillowcase, i borrow your lipstick so often

Thats how deep Tsu really is

So oneday they are chilling in Mina's room and Tsu kisses her just for the hell of it she can't take this longing one anymore it's so agrrsive at first but it slowly melts into something sweet after that Tsu's sitting on top of Mina both of them are just sitting there looking crazy not knowing where to go from there and keep it between themselves like "THIS WILL NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN, THAT WAS JUST A ONE TIME THING"

Nothing at school is normal anymore it happens more often, they kiss at their lockers when nobody is around, they eat lunch on the roof and kiss there it's just a lot of kissing and not asking any questions

Not very sure how they could actually get together but tell me what you think

Next one IidaBakugo i think we talked about this one before?

BUT THINK ABOUT BAKUGO FINDING IIDAS RED EYES INTERESTING? like Bakugo caressing his face removing his glasses

ALSO Iida not changing any aspect of his person now that he's regularly associating with Bakugo, Bakugo isn't changing either they just kinda stay how they are both of them are very good at being professional around eachother and others HOWEVER

Bakugo wants to see Iida break he wants to see Iida slip up and do something "inappropriate" in front of others

things Iida deems inappropriate: PDA,Bakugo's language Especially how he talks to Iida when they are alone, the mouth on that one is something that gets him going badly it's his guilty pleasure to indulge Bakugo's behavior

Bakugo loves when the power dynamic is Iida in charge cause that's different, he loves when he acts out of his nerdy character

One day Bakugo keeps getting on his nerves all day long sitting on the desk little things like that, Iida just goes up to him and grabs his face speaking directly into his mouth ALMOST A KISS BUT NOT REALLY and tells him "Get off the desk" in his lowest voice it leaves several students in awe and Bakugo a blushing mess

Anything you have to add about these things TELL ME I WANNA HEAR THEM i honestly am trying to get more into Iida/Bakugo

Tell me how you think Iida/Bakugo could be? do you think Bakugo craves bad boy iida or do you think Bakugo would want him soft boy?

aaaa i'm so sorry i couldnt be here last monday but im here now, let's deep dive together!!

MinaTsuyu

I LOVE SAPPHIC COUPLES I'M SO EXCITED FOR THIS

First, I really love that you gave us some background for Tsu, she's always looking for love and it's never the right time or the right person, she just wants to be loved and cared for but it seems everybody else can find their perfect person except for her For Mina, I don't think she has love in her mind like that, she has fun with people but she's not necessarily looking for serious stuff at the moment (or so she thinks).

But when their friendship starts progressing, I think both of them begin to realize they are attracted to each other, they believe the other is the prettiest girl in the world, and both of them love physical touch, so there are lots of hugs and hand holding but none of them ever says anything afraid to ruin it and misunderstand things.

idk why but I feel like mina would kiss first?? just like a peck and immediately pull back bc she's too afraid she just ruined everything but tsu gets her and kisses her properly!!

I think maybe they would unconsciously hide just bc they don't know how to define what they are yet, but everyone kind of knows there's something going on with them, and tsuyu is a Lover, so she eventually says she wants all the dating perks, she wants to be a Girlfriend, she wants all the sweet stuff and mina is in love, she finally realizes that she doesn't mind serious as long as it's with the girl she loves :((

IidaBakugo

I vaguely remember we talked about them, they are an interesting pair for sure because I think they both don't know how to process and express emotions properly?? like they're both in the same spectrum of "I don't know how to express I'm in love with you so I'm gonna scream"

Love them having dynamics based on challenging each other, bakugo wants to see him break, iida wants to see him be a bit more proper (kinda, bc he likes him the way he is)

POWER DYNAMICS YESSS, iida has so much potential as a more dominant partner especially with bakugo, and I do think bakugo craves that the most (he would never admit it tho). But yes, I can see iida being the only one who can really put bakugo in his place when he's serious about something. Iida would tease him not even consciously like, getting all up in his face and personal space to speak, but not kissing, getting bakugo to move by touching his back or waist but not actually holding him, it drives katsuki insane until he snaps and finally asks (screams) for iida to just do things properly!!!

i guess that's all i have for now with these couples, i love our conversations here so much <3