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#specially since it's supposed to be a call-back to a *different* special pikachu i think?
treehuggeranonymous · 2 years
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Pokeshipping Week 2022 Day 3: Soulmates
Soulmarks
Misty Waterflower had been enamoured with the idea of a soul mark from the first moment she heard about them. She knew that not everyone got a soul mark - that it was special - and that being soulmates wasn’t necessarily the same thing as being in love.
Still, she couldn’t help but imagine the words that might appear upon her wrist. Something poignant and meaningful that only she and her soulmate would understand. Something that would change their lives. 
And so, on her tenth birthday, when the word ‘thanks’ first appeared on her wrist she felt a little underwhelmed. ‘Thanks’ was the kind of thing you said unthinkingly about twenty times a day to perfect strangers. It wasn’t a word you said to you soulmate. 
It wasn’t unique or special.
There were probably hundreds of people who had said thanks to her in her first ten years of life. How exactly was she supposed to distinguish her soulmate amongst those?
Although Misty remained a romantic and fully believed that she would one day meet her soulmate, she decided soul marks were kind of pointless.
—-
There was kind of a lot going on the day Ash Ketchum turned ten, so he could be forgiven for not paying attention to the soul mark that appeared on wrist that morning until later that evening.
The words he read there were immediately familiar, having been spoken to him some six or seven hours earlier.
‘Nah, it’s just a kid’
He couldn’t remember her name - or if she’d even given him her name - but that didn’t matter. She was his soulmate so it was inevitable that their paths would cross again.
And they did, the very next day. Thus reinforcing for Ash the idea that Misty Waterflower - his soulmate - was just inevitable and would always be around. Even after she went back to Kanto and he continued on his journey he just took it for granted that Misty would be a continuing presence in his life. 
“Friendship is something you have to work on,” Brock said to him one day, after a none-too-gentle reminder that it had been awhile since they’d caught up with their friend in Cerulean.
“It’s different for me and Myst,” Ash waved off nonchalantly. “We’re soulmates.”
“You’re soulmates?” Brock questioned incredulously.
Ash nodded, pulling back his wristguard to reveal the words embedded there - the very words that Misty had spoken when she’d hauled him and Pikachu out of the river. 
“Okay, so you’re soulmates,” Brock conceded - the words were too much like Misty to deny the implication, “but that doesn’t mean you don’t have to work on your friendship. Soulmates get divorced, fall out of touch, and have relationship ending fights all the time. Being soulmates isn't a guarantee that your relationship - whatever it might be,” he added before Ash could protest against the idea of romance, “will work out the way you want it to.”
“So you’re saying I should call Misty,” Ash gathered from Brock’s monologue.
“You could even invite her to come visit,” he suggested. “By the way,” he said, as Ash stood to make his way to the vidscreens, “what did you say when she fished you out of the river?”
Ash looked thoughtful for a second as he went over his memories. “I think like thanks, or something like that. Why?”
Brock just shook his head, not all that surprised by the admission. 
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angry-glasses · 2 years
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why is the flying-type tera jewel balloons. why isn't it wings.
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ridiasfangirlings · 3 years
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Couldn’t get this out if my head - Brother AU where Yata and Munakata are half brothers. I just can’t get the reactions of everyone finding out. Like say during group missions with red and blue if it looks like Yata is about to be injured Munakata will jump in to be big brother and save Yata. Which in turn confuses some squad members to spark rumors of them dating. Cue Fushimi who has a freak out and doesn’t know how to ask if they are true or not. The stress gets amplified when Munakata tries to get lunch with his little brother cause that’s what a big brother does. And that since Munakata is the big brother he is allowed to call Yata “Misaki-kun” (Yata does not see it this way). Or that he’ll stop by HOMRA and Yata’s part time jobs to check up on him. It eventually comes to head when one member of the blues decided that enough is enough and that Yata should be more considerate other feelings and he should treat who he’s dating better. They rally the troops and go off to find Yata who’s walking around with the rest of the HOMRA crew and confront him. This leads to Yata having to scream at them that he is not dating their boss that would just be gross. Cue blue member asking back wants wrong with our captain anyone would want to date him. Yata feeling attacked bites back I’m not into incest that’s why before going red in the face embarrassed. Shocked and confused pikachu faces. Yata explains your captain’s my brother before leaving to go into hiding. The two squads part ways with everything making a little more since and when the blues get back they pass the information around that no the two are not dating and that they are brothers. Fushimi goes from relieved that Misaki is not dating he annoying captain to anxious that Misaki and the captain are related (Sarumi for the win...sorry). The blues now understand the relationship and the reds now have jokes like “you brother poached your boyfriend” or “hmm you better go say hi to your big brother” whenever they see Munakata out. Idk I just couldn’t get this idea and several others out of my head and was wondering your take on the different reactions of the two clans or how they all find out.
I am honestly very amused by the idea of the clans assuming Munakata and Yata are dating only to find out that they're related and probably thinking why does the idea of them dating suddenly feel like the more realistic one. Like say Munakata's always wanted to be a doting big brother to Yata but Yata's never liked him, like imagine by the time they are aware of the other's existence Munakata's already in high school preparing for college (oh maybe Munakata was the result of like Yata's dad having an affair before Yata was born too and he finally decided to leave Yata's mom for his mistress and so Yata also kinda dislikes Munakata for that even though he technically didn't have anything to do with it). Munakata never gets the chance initially to do much with his younger half brother, he only meets Yata like once before going to college and it's not until he becomes the Blue King and sees who the members of Homra are that he's very intrigued to discover his little brother has been busy in his absence.
Of course Munakata has always secretly wanted to be a big brother himself and now he's like determined to foster some brotherly affection between himself and his unruly younger sibling. Yata has no interest in this whatsoever and he also doesn't want anyone to know that he and Munakata are related because how uncool would it be for him as a member of Homra to be the younger half brother of the stupid Blue King. This does not stop Munakata from trying to be the best big brother he can be, which leads to moments such as Munakata noticeably stepping in to save Yata from being attacked by a Strain during some mission where Homra and Scepter 4 ran into each other, or giving Yata special attention whenever they run across each other (also he doesn't stop Fushimi from riling Yata up but maybe he keeps trying to encourage Fushimi in his own way to be more honest with his feelings, like a good big brother he wants to help his sibling find love too). He also refers to Yata within earshot of other clansmen as 'Misaki-kun' which is what really gets the rumor mill going, like did you hear the Blue King and Homra's Yata Misaki are on a first name basis with each other.
The Scepter 4 and Homra rank and file are soon all gossiping about it and of course Fushimi hears it eventually too. At first he blows it off as ridiculous but then imagine he hears Munakata call Yata 'Misaki' too and he's confused and irritated and doesn't know why the idea of this upsets him so much. Meanwhile imagine one day Yata runs across some Scepter 4 guys and he can't resist making some comment about their stupid King, the S4 alphabet are pissed that Yata could speak so cruelly of his supposed boyfriend. A few other members of Homra and Scepter 4 happen to be in earshot as the arguing progresses, the S4 boys thinking Yata needs to be ore grateful and is this how you treat someone in your type of relationship while Yata's mad thinking Munakata told everyone that they're brothers and that's the type of relationship they mean. He's like that guy's always smothering me and trying to act like we're close, the S4 boys are like so you don't even think you're close to the guy you're dating. Yata's immediately like what the fuck we're not dating we're brothers you sickos a moment before he realizes that no one actually knew and now he just told everybody his 'big secret.'
This of course opens a whole new can of worms for Yata, on the Homra side while no one questions his loyalty I'm sure the Homra guys can't resist teasing him sometimes about being 'the Blue King's baby brother.' The Scepter 4 guys like to use this to taunt Homra with too, like shouldn't you show respect to your vanguard's more successful brother. Fushimi is initially still a little bewildered by all this but I can totally see him using it as ammo to taunt Yata too, like noting Munakata got all the height in the family (and meanwhile Munakata's probably continuing to try and get the two of them to reconcile and finally admit their feelings, if only so he has an excuse to suggest that Fushimi also call him 'big brother'). Munakata only knows that Yata told everyone they're brothers so he assumes this must mean Yata has embraced the strength of their filial bonds at last and he's even more eager to bond as siblings should, poor Yata is like I should have just said we were dating.
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askkrenko · 4 years
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Krenko’s Guide to Pokemon: Eevee Line
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Part 1. Because seriously.
DESIGN:
Eevee was intentionally designed to be some sort of generic wild critter that could exist but doesn’t. Given traits of all sorts of small, furry things, the purpose of Eevee is to be cute, lovable, and evoke the feeling of ‘some animal.’ It is simultaneously known to everyone and completely unknown. Everyone recognizes Eevee but nobody actually knows what it is.  Eevee is, above all else, THE ‘normal’ Pokemon.
And honestly, it’s totally freaking adorable. Eevee is the best rabbit dog fox kitty thing that ever was, and nobody doesn’t love Eevee. Its design basically couldn’t be better. There’s a reason this fuzzlewuzzle regularly competes with Pikachu for being the face of Pokemon. Sure, it can’t quite win, but it’s up there.
But the concept of Eevee is really the interesting one. Eevee was the first Pokemon with branching evolutions, and while other Pokemon have gotten such since then, Eevee has always had the most. Starting with three in Generation 1, there are currently eight possible evolutions of Eevee, and there could easily be more on the way. This puts the Eevee line in a really notable position. I always love when a Pokemon has a unique gimmick, and while in combat each Eeveelution might just be another, having an Eevee with so many options to choose from makes it an interesting Pokemon to obtain.
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But before we discuss the designs of any evolutions, let’s talk about the non-evolved alternate form: Gigantamax. Like Pikachu and Meowth, GIgantamax Eevee is just a gimmick. The Pokemon’s not strong enough to be used, and Gigantamax Eevee can’t actually evolve, so it’s just there to be big and fluffy and cute… and it just fails at that. It’s not that Gigantamax Eevee isn’t cute- of course it is- but it’s not cuter than Eevee is normally, and the big bushy collar isn’t nearly as fun of a unique touch as Meowth being memes or Pikachu going back to its fat gen 1 design. Sadly, Gigantamax Eevee is a waste of everyone’s time.
And now onto the actual evolutions.
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VAPOREON: 
Vaporeon is an interesting and unique creature, with large fins on its head and small ones down its back and tail giving it the appearance of a fish, but still with a clearly mammalian mouth and legs. Vaporeon is clearly aquatic and clearly related to Eevee, but other than that it simply doesn’t look like anything. And yet Vaporeon still has a clear design and aesthetic, as something that could maybe possibly be something between a dog, a seal and a dolphin. It’s an elegant, clean design that looks fantastic without looking absurd. 
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JOLTEON:
Jolteon’s just yellow with spikes. It’s simple, but it works. There’s nothing weird about Jolteon’s design in the least, though admittedly that means there’s nothing overly special about it. Jolteon is just what happens when you take Eevee and make it cool, and other than the bright coloration there’s nothing particularly odd about it. One of the more subdued Eeveelutions, I like it, it’s cool, but I don’t exactly have specific praise for it.
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FLAREON:
Flareon looks even more realistic than Jolteon. The red coloration’s a bit bright, but other than that it’s just a big ol’ floofy floof. The shape and color of its fur suggest fire, but unlike many fire types it doesn’t feel the need to actually be on fire.  Like Jolteon, Flareon is a good, clean design.
It’s also noteworthy here that the first three Eeveelutions have big collars, like Eevee does. The rest do not. Honestly, I really like this part of the design, but I understand why not all would have it.
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ESPEON:
The psychic evolution, Espeon’s purple colors are a bit more out there than the previous three,  and my first instinct when looking at it is that it’s supposed to be hairless like a Sphynx Cat, but then it has those huge tufts on the side of its face that are clearly hair despite it not having tufts or even signs of fur anywhere else. They’re too high to be whiskers, too, so they just come across as weird. In fact, everything about Espeon is weird, and not always for the better. The split tail is a cool design, but I don’t understand what it’s going for. The jewel on the forehead I DO understand as a psychic focus, but it’s so obviously artificial compared to the previous Eeveelutions that it feels out of place. In fact, the core concept of Espeon feels a bit out of place. Most of the Eeveelutions are the result of stone or location radiation, and Umbreon happens at night. Espeon levels up in the day time with affection, and somehow becomes a psychic type. A psychic type whose pokedex entry calls the Sun Pokemon. 
Eevee’s whole gimmick is that when exposed to weird stuff it transforms, so I have a hard time understanding why a happy Eevee turns into a psychic type during the day. If it was just about the strong bond with its trainer, why does the sun matter? And if the sun does matter, what’s going on with its everything?
Espeon ultimately just doesn’t work for me. It reads wrong as a creature and I don’t understand how it fits in with other Eevee lore.
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UMBREON:
Okay, what’s up with those circles? Black fur I get. Gold stripes I get. Floofy tail, red eyes, sleek body, sure sure sure. I am totally on board with that. But those clean, obvious golden rings absolutely take me out of this design. I get that they’re supposed to be moonlight rings or something, but I’d have been much happier if this thing had golden spots instead of such clean shapes, to make it look more like a realistic animal. 
As far as actually fitting though, it makes sense as a Night-based Pokemon, but the Moon thing is a bit more of a stretch. It’s not nearly as bad as Espeon and the Sun, but Eevee plus Moonlight should result in a brighter, glowing Eevee, not a darker, more sinister Eevee.  Umbreon also has a serious issue of its abilities not being what it says they are. For example, the Pokedex says it’s got poison; Umbreon has never naturally learned a poison type attack. Its rings glowing is supposed to be one of its key features, but none of its abilities reflect that.
This isn’t to say that I dislike Umbreon or Espeon overall. Some of my favorite Pokemon have been Umbreons and Espeons. Their designs just really don’t sell the story that they’re trying to.
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LEAFEON:
So, now this is more like what I’m talking about. Eevee + Moss Rock/Leaf Stone = Eevee that’s turning into a plant. It’s still an animal, but with its ears and tail and some of its fur turning into leaves so it can now photosynthesize. Also the leaf is a sword because that’s bitchin’.
Now, while I am totally on board with Leafeon’s concept, I do think the design could’ve used a bit of tweaking. The head and tail are great, but the little leaf things coming off the body look a bit odd, and I’m not really sold on the mostly tan color scheme. I think it’d have looked better with more browns and greens. Specifically, brown legs and belly, green back and neck. Maybe a leafy collar like the original Eeveelutions all had collars. Still, I like it overall.
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GLACEON:
I don’t particularly like Glaceon. While it reads as an Ice Eevee it doesn’t read as an Eevee infused with Ice or adapted to Ice so much as it reads as an Eevee with design elements that look ice-like. The sharp diamond shapes over it don’t actually have anything to do with ice the way Jolteon’s spikes are the result of electric charge or Flareon’s floof looks like fire. Further, the addition of what is clearly a hairdo is just sort of weird. It’s too sharp to look like it comes naturally and while it makes for an interesting visual element it doesn’t mean anything or serve any purpose in the Glaceon itself. At least Espeon’s split tail was supposed to be for sensing things. Glaceon just has huge flaps that are definitely a disadvantage in a fight and don’t seem to serve any purpose other than possibly attracting a mate. 
Glaceon is a solid design for a creature but not for ‘this is an Eevee mutated by the ice element.’
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SYLVEON:
OH MY GOD WHAT THE HELL IS THIS ABOMINATION!?!?
Oh, it’s a cute fairy Eevee that’s pink and blue with ribbons and bows? You’d think so, and I don’t mind the color scheme for a fairy type but THOSE ARE NOT RIBBONS AND BOWS. Those are ‘feelers.’ Those are FLESH. Fur-covered, wriggly, boneless flesh. 
This is bad. This is wrong. This is not okay.
This is not a fairy. This is an eldritch horror. Foxes should not have tentacles, and tentacles should not have fur. 
And that’s not even getting into how much I hate Sylveon’s evolution method. Eevee evolves into Sylveon when it has affection and knows a fairy type move… but Eevee can just learn Baby-Doll Eyes on its own at level 15, so this isn’t a feat or anything special, it’s just a normal part of raising an Eevee. The worst part is that this is some weird new and special method to explain why you couldn’t have done it before, but the only actual change here is that Eevee didn’t learn Baby-Doll Eyes naturally before, so instead of something being discovered the world has just been rewritten to allow Sylveon to exist.
Because Sylveon is a monster from outside reality that has forced its way in here.
I hate Sylveon. I hate Sylveon so much. And to truly understand how much I hate Sylveon you need to understand that I love Eevee. I have two Eevee on my nightstand- named Artemis and Apollo after my Espeon and Umbreon from Gold and Silver. I make it a point to use Eeveelutions in every game, because I love them so much. One of my oldest RP characters was a Jolteon named Flash. On Halloween, I had one of my video game characters dress up as an Eevee to go to a costume party in an MMO. Which obviously didn’t have an Eevee costume so I had to assemble it. So my hate for Sylveon isn’t just ‘oh, this is an icky Pokemon,’ but I take its existence as an insult to Eevee, who I love so much.
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You came to the wrong Eeveehood by Dakunart
TYPING:
What type do you want? Eeveelutions come in eight different types, each with their own strengths and weaknesses. But that’s Pokemon for you. And in the future we’ll probably get even more types. I just hope they have good designs and aren’t disgusting abominations.
STATS OVERVIEW:
We’ll talk about stats of Eeveelutions individually, but for now let’s note what they all have in common: numbers. Every evolved form of Eevee has a 130, a 110, a 95, two 65s, and a 60, for a total of 525 base stats, making for Pokemon that are highly specialized in some areas and very weak in others. This results in all of them having at least a decent stat array, except for Flareon, though whether their array is offensive, defensive, or more balanced varies.
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Eeveelutions by Endivinity
MOVES OVERVIEW:
As with stats, we’ll discuss them for individual evolutions, but as they’re all evolved from Eevee they do share a large amount of their move pool. Eevee is notorious for learning Baton Pass naturally, a move so powerful and useful it’s been banned in many formats, and though it requires chain breeding, Eevee’s one of a relatively small number of Pokemon that can learn Wish.
Yawn, Substitute, Protect, and Rest all offer strategic options, and though not available in the current generation, Eevee could previously learn Toxic. 
Actual attack forms for Eevee to learn pre-evolution are pretty limited, but an Eevee can learn Shadow Ball and Iron Tail, both of which have their uses.
Eevee does have a number of unique attacks, primarily from Let’s Go Eevee but also the Z-Move Extreme Evoboost. While all of these are viciously powerful to the point of being outright broken, Eevee’s evolved forms can’t learn them, and thus they’re not relevant in most competitive play. 
Next time, we’ll start going down the list of forms and discussing them in the specifics. This one’s a doozy.
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Eeveelutions by Lushies-Art
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miraculouscontent · 4 years
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You said that you could roast XY&Z for days in your last post. What about it didn't you like?
Keeping things short (...well, short for my standards anyway):
In terms of strictly just the anime, XY did a lot of things right and was a step-up compared to Black & White. It raised a lot of people’s hopes and seemed to be taking things more seriously in terms of plot, like how Ash’s team was actually getting fully evolved and such (some cases of which are admittedly ridiculous since the series is pretty short yet he has a Goodra and a Noivern, the latter of whom he raised from an egg), but ultimately, XY&Z just brings back all of the old formulas.
me when anything involving Zygarde happens: Wow, it would be great if any of this actually existed or happened within the games instead of just the show flexing like, “Hey, look at this cool thing you can’t personally experience!”
Serena losing her final contest performance. I know they’re actually showcases but it’s just Pokemon contests with a different coat of paint, let’s be honest. I was already sour about the fact that someone in the show, again, gets to experience something we can’t (Gen 5 had Pokemon Musicals and that was the closest thing we got to this, but that was in Gen 5, not 6), but the thing about Serena losing her final contest performance is that it’s irritating for a multitude of reasons, not just the fact that we can’t do showcases ourselves (to be clear, it’s not about how exciting/unexciting showcases would’ve been in-game; it’s that they had to make up showcases to give Serena something to do because XY was so light on content).
- First is that what we saw of Aria’s performance was really generic and unimpressive, but the second thing is big and just--I’m sorry, whichever writer decided that it was a smart idea to have the winner between Serena (a rando from Vaniville Town who’s only just making a name for herself) and Aria (essentially a celebrity who’s been around for a long time) be decided by the people in the audience needs to be fired. It makes sense when it’s a bunch of no-names all competing against each other, but when it’s a no-name versus a celebrity? For Arceus’ sake, the whole reason contests were originally decided by judges is because judges are (at least supposed to be) impartial. Did it suck when May and Dawn lost their Grand Festival? Yes, of course it did, but at least it didn’t feel so much like it was weighed against them.
- Like, imagine sitting and watching this episode and seeing the in-show audience decide who wins, most of whom probably have Aria merchandise like posters and figures and just, like--”Wow, gee, it really seemed like Serena could’ve had it! Wonder what tipped the scales for the audience!”
- To put this into perspective, imagine if the show decided that the viewers - the actual, real-life viewers - of the show got to decide who won the showcase. Even if some of them honestly thought that Serena deserved to win, you don’t think a majority were like, “Who cares about Aria? Serena’s our main girl and she’s gotta WIN!”?
Speaking of Serena--
- Serena at Ash before leaving to go to Hoenn: Hippity hoppity your lips are now my (implied) property.
Ash Greninja was a cool concept that amounted to nothing. The idea that Ash has this special link with one of his Pokemon (”Hey, look at this really cool thing that you can’t actually experience in-game!” until Omega Ruby and Alpha Sapphire and it’s underwhelming at best) and can feel their pain, but the link can cause him to get carried away because now he’s really experiencing the adrenaline rush of battle... that’s incredible! That’s a really neat idea!
- But... ultimately, it’s giving preferential treatment to a starter... again. Gen 6 already threw Charizard an extra bone by giving him a second Mega (and even when they got rid of Megas in Gen 8, they were like “lol let’s give him a Gigantimax form in advance and give him to the champion”; by the way, no, I didn’t play Sword & Shield because I’m a Living Dexer so the lack of - you know - Pokemon was a deal-breaker) and now here they are again not treating the starter lines fairly (even in-game, we have Protean Greninja, so it’s a double hitter). I was open to the idea and was getting swept up in the excitement, but... what does it mean in the end? It doesn’t amount to anything; Greninja is still another Pokemon who gets released essentially.
- Why didn’t they just do something with Pikachu (Ash Hat Pikachu was eventually a thing after all), which is something they could’ve easily carried over to future seasons and continued expanding upon? I mean, Ash’s Pikachu is already special in its own right and this would be like giving it the evolution it’s never going to get. Heck, even just like... they could have it where it wasn’t even either Ash nor Pikachu being special, but they engaged in some sort of special bonding ritual at some special place (anyone remember Ashachu? That was a cool concept too and they wasted it; could’ve even been a reason for them to make this connection at that place because Ash had been a Pikachu once before).
Alain’s existence. Just--like, his entire existence, fanservice Charizard X and all.
- I want to make it clear for anyone who didn’t experience XY&Z (count your blessings) that, when the Mega Evolutions specials were coming out, we were given at least the impression that it wasn’t going to have anything to do with the series. Then things started happening and this is essentially how it went down.
- everyone, seeing that Alain is part of the main series now: oh no
- everyone, seeing Ash plant the seed in Alain’s head about entering the League: oh no
- everyone, seeing Alain having a near-loss against Ash (after having a couple wins before) before Ash blacks out, ending the battle abruptly and leaving the battle undecided, which is similar to what they pulled with Sawyer (having Sawyer win once against Ash before the League so it would still have suspense and wouldn’t just be Ash wrecking him again) except now it’s in the opposite direction: OH NO
- The League finale episode, in Japanese, was essentially called, “Kalos League Victory! Satoshi's Ultimate Match!!” and yeah, it was blatant clickbait.
- Ash!Greninja pulls off a Giant Mega Death Water Shuriken for the final exchange of blows in the match (Water Shuriken VS Charizard X’s Blast Burn) and it amounts to literally nothing because Greninja goes down anyway (to a Fire move of all things, which somehow feels even more offensive).
- They didn’t play Ash’s theme when said Water Shuriken happened so it was semi-obvious that he wasn’t going to win. Heck, his mom didn’t even show up to watch the match from what I remember.
- So yeah, Ash lost and--People. Were. Livid. The dislike bar on the Japanese trailer for the following episode was insane. I think what it ultimately amounted to was that people were so sick of the formula and XY seemed like such a step up from the last attempt and people really thought that the writers were finally learning their lesson. They really thought everything was going to turn around, and--yeah. It just ended up being more of the same except worse because they did everything to make it look like they cared.
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Suppose a Kid... 1 | Hortensia Saga 1 | Kumo Desu Ga 1 | 2.43 1 | Cells at Work!! 1 - 2 | Cells at Work: Code Black 1 | Back Arrow 1 - 2 | Praeter 1 | Horimiya 1 | Tomozaki 1 - 2 | Wonder Egg Priority 1 | IChu 1 | Kemono Jihen 1 | YuruCamp 2 1 | Dr Stone: Stone Wars 1 | Sk8 1 | Mushoku Tensei 1 | Design-bu 1 | Wave!! 1 | BSD Wan! 1 | Ex-Arm 1
After much watching...I cut it down to 5 anime and 1 short.
Suppose a Kid… 1
I am not writing out that full title every time! Anyways, here’s the first “real” debut of winter 2021.
For some reason…this series reminds me of Pokemon. Probably how at the start, Ash tries to get along with Pikachu by doing all sorts of things like what Lloyd is doing here. (<- learnt protag’s name through synopses)
The name “Shouma” rang a bell and I was right – Shouma is voiced by Souma…Saito.
The Japanese title has “monogatari” on the end there…so it probably doesn’t fully translate into the English title.
These orange flecks in Lloyd’s eyes are kinda distracting…
Isn’t Kunlun in China, though…?
If this is just going to be Marie yelling…I don’t see why I should stay. (<- turned volume on for everything so far)
*facepalms* Lloyd is so dense…
That fight scene’s not very good…
…oh great. Selen’s fallen in love with Lloyd already…*sigh*
The missing princess is certainly going to be a plot point later.
Wow, that tiger looks impressive! If only they could’ve done that for the fight scene…
…oh great, Selen is a low-key yandere…
Didn’t Lloyd say he sucked at combat…? Anyways, I’m not keeping this. The designs are colourful and the tiger was good, but it’s meant to be a comedy and it’s not funny.
Hortensia Saga 1
Here for Ume! He’s voicing a guy called Defloitte Danois.
I-Is that CGI? So early on into the anime???
*a dude gets bitten into by the werewolf*…welp, at least this series isn’t afraid of its own gore.
I had a sinking feeling our real protag was Alfred…and I was right, according to the OP.
Huh? The song goes silent for a second near the end…what the heck?
The book appears to use English, albeit English so faintly inked in you can’t quite tell what language it is.
Alfred, governing Albert…? Isn’t that a bit redundant?
I swear all the female voices in this anime are squeaky as all get out…
All these high fantasy anime – or heck, any high fantasy series full stop – ever justify why the country is worth fighting for. It’s why I find war stories pointless and senseless.
You can tell from the voice and short stature “Marius” is Mariel…but she uses boku, which is why Alfred can’t really tell the difference. (Also, he wasn’t privy to the fact Mariel cut her hair.)
This almost smacks of a game tutorial. The CGI is still there…it’s not as bad as other examples I’ve seen, but you can tell it’s CGI when you look at it.
Roy’s kind of pretty, in a generic way.
A close-range archer! Ho, you’re kinda impressive yourself, Roy. (The feeling of a game tutorial has disappeared by this point.)
Hortense…of Hortensia…how confusing.
The scruffy guy you keep seeing with the dark hair is Defloitte. Keep an eye out for him for me, would you?
The ED seems to consist mostly of…anguished pop screams. *cringes slightly*
Anyways, this anime isn’t bad. It’s quite average though and its CGI could easily get worse.
Kumo Desu ga 1
…you know I don’t like 1st person cam, yeah?
…this is just Kumoko (as I’ve heard her being called) yelling so far…plus there’s quite a bit of CGI.
I like how the ED has an English overlay and the style they’ve used for it. The music, though…? Nah.
Wait a second? Millepensee? Shin Itagaki? That would explain the CGI!
“…a spider that just happens to have my memories.” – A butterfly dream, huh?
…well, at least this anime is well aware of the genre space it inhabits. Maybe you could say…it’s an isekai light novel, so what? *groans from the audience*
…well, you didn’t really “bring” your “brother’s” (?) corpse in case of an emergency, now, did you?
…welp, to have guts, you must eat guts. I guess that’s how it goes.
What’s a “skanda”?
This anime’s quite monologue-y (as expected of an LN). I can live with it, but I don’t know if it can carry the entire thing through the season.
…humans? Haven’t seen them almost all episode. What are they up to?
These designs sort of look like SAO’s. They’re not a dealbreaker yet, but they could be down the line…
This ED seems to take cues from Cop Craft’s OP (same studio). It also has some…“Aggretsuko rage”, I guess you could call it.
2.43 1
…Another confusing title, I see. I normally don’t do sports anime, but I’m here for Ume.
*sees the colour of the volleyball* - Basically anything volleyball has to collaborate with volleyball maker Mikasa, doesn’t it?
This anime seems to like putting characters’ thoughts on the screen for dramatic impact. The CGI is sort of visible, but not a dealbreaker.
I’d thought I’d heard of this OP artist before, but it turns out I haven’t.
This series has a nice sense of force. You see those moments where the ball squishes, or when Yuni presses against the wall without thinking? Those.
LOL, way to burn Yuni, Chika…
These transitions are a bit hard to detect. I think I like Akudama’s more overt ones more.
LOL, Dr Popper (sic).
The serves are nothing special. Haikyuu does the same thing from the episode I saw of it. (You know I don’t like Haikyuu, yeah? Dropped it after 1 episode because everything I heard the fans talking about caused me to connect the dots.)
The way Yuni blushes…it’s more than someone usually would, even if it is out of embarrassment. It may just be the entertainment I consume, but I could swear that’s going somewhere in more of a BL manner.
I get the feeling Chika has a bit of Virgo or Taurus in him somewhere. The sort of guy who nags at everyone to do stuff his way is probably like that.
Pocari Sweat (unaltered).
I gave myself dimples by puffing up my cheeks and poking them until they became permanent. I guess you can do the same thing with ambidexterity…?
For some reason, I can detect Chika’s jealousy when he discusses blocks and natural talent.
…wow, this anime is pretty serious for a volleyball anime.
The ED scene where the face is replaced with flowers is pretty creepy. Like Jigokuraku or something.
Cells at Work!! 1
What are these blob creatures you see in the OP, anyway…?
I think I remember reading something that the numbers assigned to the cells aren’t arbitrary – they’re hexadecimal colors, e.g. RBCs get shades of red as their numbers.
D’aww, Platelets warm the heart. They really do.
Platelets have a master…? I thought they were all just lil’ kids.
“What the cell’s going on?!” – Oh, I remember seeing a tweet about this. I love that pun! Kudos to whoever was responsible for that.
LOL, no. 4989 dancing in the background.
Hmm…those nets look like CGI.
…uh, I did not need that shot of the Megakaryocyte’s camel toe…that’s distubring.
Wait, Backward Cap is a she?!
Aw, lookit WBC being a dad. That’s cute.
Backward Cap = Ushiromae-chan.
Is that…a construction worker holding a giant pudding?!
Cells at Work Code Black 1
This anime is called “black” due to black companies. It’s Code Black to avoid being racist, I guess. I’m looking forward to it because it’s undoubtedly going to show a dark side to the main series…
…and there it is, the RBC complaining.
I assume OJT = on the job training.
I knew “pespin” (sic) was a typo. It’s pepsin.
Now that I’ve been working at customer service for two years (give or take COVID), I can see where the senpai RBC is smoothing over the relations.
…that also means I know where to suppress my emotions. I’m not a person who opens up to people easily without getting used to them, so people never see me as suitable for customer service anyway, but it’s the only experience I have so *shrugs*.
…oh gosh. I haven’t seen these words since…the time I was still learning biology.
…*sigh* Rookie RBC is worried about boobs.
The fact Senpai lost his iconic hat…is kinda sad, actually.
“Don’t let his resolve be for nothing.”
Hmm…does the male WBC from the main series wear black fingerless gloves?
I thought I’d heard of this artist before…but turns out I just can’t distinguish really autotuned artists from each other…(lel)
…and stuff goes ka-blam. It’s the spiritual successor to HypMic, even if I wasn’t asking for it. (LOL)
Back Arrow 1
…I heard you said “hot guys”? (Yes, I am predictable as all get out.)
What’s with that episode title…?
Stereotypes, eh? I kind of expected as much from the promo, but where’s the title character…?
…was that yuri fanservice? I can’t quite tell because it was the aftermath of an action scene, but I can see the shippers gearing up in my head.
…after a bit of waiting, there he is. Back Arrow himself. He kind looks like Takuto (Star Driver).
“I’m not trying to hide anything!” – Well, that’s…true.
…*sigh* Why do girls always have more feminine-looking mechs? (Plus this one has boobs…*sighhhhhhhhhhhh*)
So it seems mechs in this anime are the form of one’s conviction and they have skills along those lines, eh? An interesting concept.
…you do realise I abandoned an entire anime based on a joke about lucky underwear? However, this anime is so absurd and just keeps running with the joke that I just can’t say no to it. If there’s one thing I’ve learnt from volunteering at a charity store, it’s that when it comes to selling stuff, you can’t say no to a lot of stuff…including selling potentially used underwear, so long as it’s not dirty or stinky.
Whoa! Those things break?!
Why does the title card mention the wall...?
Anyways, I…like it, surprisingly enough. Let’s keep going.
Back Arrow 2
…eh? Didn’t expect inflatable clothing, LOL.
I suspect Shu Bi is scheming something.
What’s the long thing…?
“…tomorrow might not come.” – A good reminder to have in these times of COVID.
Peath = Peace. (Heh. What a stupid name…*thinks about the name “Quattro Bajeena” suddenly* Okay, “Peath” pales in comparison to that.)
What is that creature that circles in the sky…?
I know this is meant to be a serious fight, but…that attacking guy’s hat seriously looks like a bamboo stalk and so I keep seeing it and trying not to laugh.
I only just now realised there’s CGI. CGI these days is getting much better than it used to be.
Tomozaki 1
LOL, Yontendo. It’s clearly Smash Bros + Nintendo Switch and the character designer was also around for Iroduku, so that’s why this style looks familiar.
…lemme guess, since this is a romance, it’s likely NONAME is Aoi. Or some other girl.
I would pay for a romance where it’s the girl building the guy up to be presentable, instead of a girl building other girls up to be presentable a la Ageha 100%.
Didn’t the anime show us Tomozaki reflecting to himself, though…?
“…rules working in combination.” - Well, there’s social norms (e.g. knock before entering a room), laws, contracts, societal standards (e.g. in Japanese society, you bow to others as a greeting or apology)…(continues to blabber on for a bit)
I think Aoi said something like “onitadaku”, but I’m not sure what the joke is there. Oni is in there, sure, but what’s the original phrase she’s playing off?
…LOL, it’s a good time to remind people to wear a mask.
LOL, Krout.
Anyways, this seems decent. I like how it’s going the way I want it to.
Tomozaki 2
“…make sure I’m nearby…” – Okay, that’s just being pushy, Aoi.
Minami and Hinami…so confusing…
*Minami chomps on Natsubayashi’s ear* - …okay, that’s not a thing girls do in real life unless they’re lesbians. This is likely trying to take the fanservice route.
They didn’t even show why the “kiss” was broken up…meaning they were doing it to make potential girl-on-girl look hot. Just great.
*Aoi touches Tomozaki’s butt* - Dude, that’s groping…
I didn’t think we’d get the story on Aoi’s “hexactly” so soon.
…well, that episode just made me feel mildly bitter. I’m dropping it here.
Praeter 1
…aw s***. Only a few seconds in and this looks like a terrible game…
It’s like someone barfed paint across Durarara…
The only time the background buildings look any good are when there’s a fight scene…
These Seals (or whatever those designs are called) seem to act like mini shields. Update: They’re called tattoos.
That transition was a bit fast for my liking…
Seems like the series is mildly peppered with Greek terms.
“To Infinity and Beyond” by…some author I can’t really read the name of.
Suddenly, they throw in more characters…?
Where does Eiji keep those bullet cases of his…? In his jacket?
Having a guy die in the 1st episode is cheap. I mean, we don’t quite care for him yet – it’s too early in the anime for that.
Now there’s Norse terms on top of the Greek ones…
Even more characters? You kidding me?
Lemme guess, Eiji gave up his tattoo because Yamato inspired him and now he’s a goner.
Welp, the weight of the world is in your hands, Yamato. Including that dead dude on your back. (<- sarcastic)
Sk8 1
I’ve been hearing good things about this anime! Let’s go! (<- about a week late to the debut)
That politician is probably relevant…probably someone’s dad, if HypMic taught me anything.
LOL, a beef. They call this stuff “beef”? Where’s the chicken? (<- joke from HypMic)
Haemanthus…apparently a flowering plant from S. Africa.
That’s rare, you don’t see Canadians in anime all that much. I was just thinking as I came home from volunteering how you know British people all have fancy names like William and Australians are Johnno, Danno etc., but Canadians? No clue. Update: Apparently you’d call one Arnold or something just as generic…?
Why are all foreigners in anime half-Japanese with the mother being the Japanese side, anyway?...Because people can make their character speak Japanese while looking foreign. Right. Moving right along.
Ahh…I understand your plight all too well, Reki.
…Hmm. It seems Reki’s surname is written kiya, but read “Kyan”. His name literally translates to “history (calendar/age) of bravery (military might)” Update: Turns out his surname is 3 characters (read “kiyan”, although I’ve never seen that final character ever being read as “n”) and his first name is one, so his first name is just “history (calendar/age)”.
Even I suck at balancing on bikes and stuff (…yeah, I still can’t ride a bike even though I’ve done so many other things in my life) and I know you have to support yourself with one foot on the ground before you do things like trick flips. I may not have observed Tony Hawk all that much, but he was on the periphery of my knowledge.
“What’s your hourly wage?” – Ouch, I feel ya, Langa.
Koko ni netete actually means “Lie down here”, but…okay.
These eyecatches are cute.
That’s a cute fox.
Yikes! 60 mph = approx. 97 km/h!!!
Random umeboshi, LOL.
Aghhhhhhhhhhh! Cherry Blossom’s so pretty~! I love him already!
Thank you, based Bones!
Something that can be enjoyed, even without sound: this is why I enjoy both action and comedy anime!
Okinawa? We’re in Okinawa?
Well, that was cool! I didn’t even ask where the location was until the end. Update: Why is this anime sometimes called Sk8 the Infinity anyway…?
Horimiya 1
Horimiya…I’ve been aware of this series for a while. There’s even a Chinese volume of it at a library close to me, although due to contact tracing I haven’t bothered to check it out.
Oh, I bet Hori is the otaku!
Ooh, Marketing Script!
Because I’ve been behind on the premieres, I’ve seen enough to know this boy with the chain is Miyamura.
…argh! Miyamura is cute! Y’all were right!!! (<- likes blushing bois)
I bet there’s going to be an emergency meeting!
“Sorry, it’s egg time!” – Oh, I’m laughing so hard! So that’s the context behind the Wonder Egg Priority meme!
“…see these?!” – Well, it’s not like you have a tattoo or some-*Miyamura shows his tattoos* Never mind…
Oh, I just realised they even animate the minute movements of the eyes Miyamura does…cool.
Notice how Miyamura is blocked from the other guy due to the window.
Miyamura goes “Ishikawa-kun” but “Hori-san”…hmm. No wonder he’s letting Ishikawa get Hori.
The problem I find with romance series is that they’re generally tied to heteronormativity. Hori is coded with red silhouettes and Miyamura with blue…*sigh* Whatever happened to gender ambiguity?
Good heavens, what is up with this ED?! It looks like Pocoyo! (…Does anyone else know that cartoon…?) Aside from that quibble, this anime is great though.
Mushoku Tensei 1
Apparently this is the grandad of all isekai. Why it took so long for an anime of this…who knows?
…and of course this guy’s a loser virgin. Go figure.
*sighhhhhhhhh* He’s just ogling this woman’s boobs…
…oh, sorry. I was so distracted by the man candy, I didn’t care about Rudy.
I-It’s actually quite refreshing to not have an OP protagonist from the get-go for once. (Or maybe I’ve developed such a disdain for isekai since SAO rolled around that everything here suddenly feels fresh.)
You can see the birthplace of isekai without having watched any of the others right here, it looks like.
“…what’s the point of incantations?” – To make it easier for you to cast spells, I gue-spoke too soon.
…wow, they shamelessly showed off Rudy’s privates. I know he’s still young at this stage, but that reminds me of how I dropped Dragon Ball around the time Goku was shown the same way (which is…very early on, by my own admission).
I believe, based on the name of the spinoff I see in the 7 Seas emails, the magic tutor is called Roxy.
You’re thinking about marriage?! At your (reincarnated) age?!
Oh no! The tree again!
LOL, Rudy’s acting like a kid who’s been in COVID lockdown for a while.
I think what most of the isekai that spun off from here missed is that the loser is job age. Losers at life at job age are relatable and high school geniuses are relatable (albeit sometimes insufferable), but losers who become NEETs for no reason whatsoever and then get banged up by Truck-kun are not.
Anyways, this was good, but a risky kind of good, since it seems like this male gaze will continue to be around as Rudy gets older.
Update: Dropped after learning Rudy was a paedophile in his past life.
Update 2: Apparently the anime toned down this paedophilic tendency of Rudy’s, so...now the verdict is that I move on while I let other people tell me if this is true of the anime or not.
Kemono Jihen 1
“Kemono Jihen” means something like “creature incidents”. I wonder why Funimation didn’t change the name…?
Kabane means “summer wing”.
Kanoko Villa, I’d assume, is named after the deer (the name means “deer’s child”).
My experience with Sho Aimoto (creator of this manga) is reading a bit of Hokenshitsu no Shinigami. (That, by the way, reminds me of Nube, but it’s nothing spectacular.) However, Hokenshitsu no Shinigami has a very detailed artstyle…That’s why I’m pretty shocked Kemono Jihen has such a scratchy one…
Ooh, edamame!
Oh, I see…this is like Furuba or a werewolf story, huh? Rather than a Natsume Yuujincho sort of thing.
…I thought Inugami and Dorotabo had seen everything of each other because of bathing together…I guess not, then.
…is Yataro going to die?
It seems the “immortal demons” are oni, so…why subtitle them as “immortal demons” and not just “demons”?
Ohhhhhhhh…this shite’s good. It seems to have a throwback feeling to it, moreso than even Yashahime or a lot of the sequels I’ve seen recently.
Cells at Work!! 2
I was going to move right along to Wonder Egg Priority because I’m really behind on the debuts right now, but I accidentally opened this up while I was cleaning up so I might as well watch another episode or two before setting it aside.
He’s dead, Jim. (<-joking)
…gosh, these walls look like Hover all over again and that’s from 1995…
LOL, these background cells don’t even have any details. They’re basically stick figures with fat bodies…
I think that phrase that appeared, “Take good care of B Cell!”, may be a pun on Give My Regards to Black Jack (written with similar Japanese, “B Cell wo Yoroshiku!” vs. “Black Jack ni Yoroshiku!”).
LOL, “you sure have the guts”…while they’re in the guts.
The certificate says something about it being presented to someone in the face of bravery, I think (<- just looked at it briefly).
“You have a good head on your shoulders,” says the T cell as WBC struggles with the disguise…stuck on his head.
Wonder Egg Priority 1
I’ve been hearing this series is surreal, but no more surreal than Flip Flappers. So…I don’t know if I’ll like it or not.
What’s this K?(?96…?
There’s a sunflower on her raincoat…so that’s why I saw a post called “You’re the sunflower”. Personally, that just reminds me of Post Malone.
Those Seeno Evils…they’re CGI, aren’t they?
As Boueibu once said (but I may be paraphrasing here), “nothing is more scary than free”.
…to be honest with you, I haven’t had a best friend for at least 2 years now. I only really feel close to people who are like me and who I have sustained contact with over many years, so I end up cutting contact with people after we part ways and never trying to fix it.
I always find it slightly absurd when anime girls get a little pudgy and go, “I’m so fat!” (See, for instance, the Dumbbell series.) Or, in this case, Ai’s going, “I’m so ugly!” when there’s nothing wrong with her. She’s only a bit different from everyone else due to her heterochromia - she doesn't have any physical or mental difficulties.
IChu 1
Here for Ume and, of course, dem bois. Bring it!
I seem to remember one of the magazines called an “Ichu” “an idol egg” (i.e. a fledgling idol)…More egg puns for me, then.
I found him! Ume! He’s Akira Mitsurugi! Update: Turns out that’s Toshiyuki Toyonaga…Oops. (Ume is actually Lucas from I*B.)
Huh? For a second, I imagined Akira with a dubbed voice. Of course, I could only be dreaming, because idol anime normally don’t get dubs, but…it was interesting to think about.
LOL, “Onsta”.
This Akio-type character is popular lately. The sort who’s timid but has an outstanding talent they themselves might not see.
…uh, but Kocho means “Principal”…?
An idol bear?!
Torahiko is crazy…(Note the tigers. Tora = tiger.)
Specifically, that’s black coffee with no sugar.
As much as I want to keep watching this, I’ll hit pause on it here. There’s much better offerings this season.
YuruCamp s2 1
…grandpa’s writing is so…neat.
*glares at CGI car…*
This OP just doesn’t compare to Shiny Days, y’know…?
OOPArts.
Talking pine cones! They’re back!
Curry rice! Literally had some of the Japanese-style stuff the other day. It was great.
All this talk about jobs…I personally don’t like jobs because I like to work at my own pace (hence one reason why I’m working on being a translator), but…money…I’m jealous, girls.
I’m trying not to rely on the subs for those texts that appear on the screen so that I can keep my reading skills up…I kept up with them for the most part…but then I got distracted by the croquette sign at one point…
“…buy you some local food?” – That’s omiyage, normally translated “souvenirs”. “Local food” actually does make more sense in that gap, though.
…man, I’m jealous that the girls all got jobs suitable for their personalities and everything. Lil’ ol’ antisocial me sucks at retail, even after 2 years.
Design-bu 1
LOL, that man and his bunny. Update: That’s Unabara-san.
…geez, these utaite are everywhere now. I’ve seen 96neko, USSS, Eve and more being more central to anime song creation…
Thise characters in the OP seal (<-the stamp, not the animal) are saiyou, meaning “recruited”, or in this case, “accepted”.
OEM = original equipment manufacturer.
Hrm…you can tell it’s a giraffe by description, but…that “base everything on the horse” is interesting as you could count several things as horse derivatives. Also, the angels’ names are all standard Japanese names with natural components to them (Ueda = upright rice field, Shimoda = frost rice field etc).
Is this pink-themed guy…a guy? Or a crossdresser? Update: That’s Kanamori-san.
I like how the suits have little wing-like flaps. Also the wings on Shimoda’s back.
…I never thought an anime episode would make me so concerned about giraffes.
That guy in the green I remember from the Wave x Tendebu (Heaven’s Design Team) collab, his name is Kimura.
Oh, so there is a bird like that!
The random wiggling the chibis do in these short segments…it’s a bit disorienting. (<-Just a small quibble of mine.)
Oh! Galapagos effect!
Agonistic: “polemical; combative.” I thought they meant “antagonistic”.
Oh man, that punch line was great! It took me a while to get into the spirit of it, but this anime is great!
Update: Oh, that’s where those nature names come from! They’re actually meant to be gods! (Or…named after gods…?) Also, Ueda vs. Shimoda (the “shimo” could be the kanji for “below”).
Ex-Arm 1
I’ve heard this anime looks bad…even well before its debut. How bad? Let’s find out.
*stifles laughter* From the first pan, I know this anime is doomed on my list. Even Praeter was better than this!
*stifles laughter again* This OP really does look as bad as the stuff I was seeing prior to winter 2021! Like a game I shouldn’t take out of my archives! (It’s not as bad as Hover’s graphics, but still…that’s from 1995. Cut it some slack.)
That’s the 2nd Kimura this season…
Yugg is just…ugly. Never try to render elaborate eyelashes in CGI again, people.
Dimension High School was better than this because at least that had puzzles. This is even jankier than that!
Wait, why is Akira 3D when his dad is 2D? It’s not that obvious, but I notice these things. Update: That’s not his dad…but close enough. (That’s his brother.)
…and here comes Truck-kun! (LOL)
This would be good…if it weren’t rendered in the jankiest CGI known to man…
Alma’s gun strike doesn’t have a lot of force to it.
The fire is rendered so terribly…*stifles laughter*
This part with a disembodied Akira is what I assume I got up at 6 am for…but I can’t hear it, due to background noise. Remind me to confirm this later. (Minami’s mouth is rendered so terribly…augh.)
No force to any of these recent motions, either.
LOL, this censorship.
Wave 1
Ever since this project was announced, I’ve been watching developments unfold on Anime News Network. I knew it would get an anime or something similar I could follow…and now here I am. I mentioned in the Sk8 comments I have basically zero knowledge of surfing, so…this is very unexpected, in one sense.
Was that a drone…?
“Wizard of the Waifu Board”?! Are you kidding me?! (LOL)
There seem to be shots where I can see the CGI here, but…anything’s better than Ex-Arm. Let’s say that.
Actually…yappe is a derivative of yabai, meaning “cool” or “crap” (in an ironic sense). So it would probably be better to translate it as “Surfing’s the greatest!” or “Surfing’s the coolest!” Anyways, what I was thinking before I was going to say this was that the waves are so enticingly animated, it feels like a summer anime. Basically the only other anime I’ve ever said that for is Grand Blue.
If I’m understanding where Isokichi’s name comes from right, “iso” is the character for seashore or a rocky beach (磯).
LOL, the teacher just wrote “Show must go on.”
Hayama, Kanagawa. Kanagawa’s capital is Yokohama, so it’s not quite Tokyo, but somewhat close.
“Murphy”? I have zero clue what that means.
Oh, I see. The title is translated that way due to context. Now that I can accept.
I just burst out into laughter when I realised Nalu hasn’t dropped or put down his ukulele once.
BSD Wan! 1
Here comes my past to haunt me…aside from me being a fan of BSD, I’m here because I influenced this series. How so? Once upon a time in the now-distant year of 2016, I was a scanlator for a brief period. Most of the work I’ve done hasn’t influenced the world at large, but this is the most influential manga I had a hand in working on.
Oh no! They’re starting with the dog AU?! (That comes from pretty far into the manga, IIRC. Further than my work was on it, at least.)
It’s Rashomon, but Rashoken (that last bit means “dog”). Hence Ruffshomon.
Basically, they just insert dog-related words everywhere…don’t make me explain every one!
Ouch, I can only imagine how much pain it was to translate Inu Shikkaku. Literally, it’s “No Longer a Dog”, but how would anyone make it in line with the other puns…?
I wasn’t fully aware of how the dog AU was connected to the main Wan series because I haven’t really looked at it after I quit due to aggregators, but…that was a nice fakeout. Also, I was concerned as to whether this was going to be a full-length ep or a short…seems like it’s a 10 minute short, so I have more chances of taking it.
…oh gosh, that pose! I remember it! I worked on this one! (Now that I know it’s a TV short, I won’t cover future episodes, but I want to at least finish this one because I started it.)
I think they added a bit there. I remember Kunikida’s and Yosano’s were in the manga, but not the other members or Fukuzawa going “the wind is smiling” + Kenji working on the roof at the start.
Oh yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh, I remember Rampo. I think I had to approximate how he would say stuff with Pocky in his mouth, but Slug (current scanlator) went the extra mile and stuck food in his mouth to do the same panel.
It seems to make a short ep., they strung a bunch of the chapters together. Also, I don’t think we ever found out what Yosano’s puddle was and that was…probably for the better.
Oh yeah…I think I remember this one.
Now I remember it! I remember having fun explaining what a youkan was.
Whoa, Higuchi scrapped the SFX! That wasn’t in the original…
The ED seems to be an Atsushi cover of Namae wo Yobu yo.
Oh noooooooooooo! The flower gazing episode! That’s the one I remember most, because I was trying to figure out how to translate 移動 while making it smooth-sounding English…(I remember the final result was something like, “Move! Move~!”
Dr Stone: Stone Wars 1
Final debut! Let’s go~!
The last time this series was on the air was about 1 year ago. I can remember that far back…
I like how that recap is framed as Gen talking to the kids.
Senku overcomes every problem with science.
…not much to comment on here.
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juleswolverton-hyde · 4 years
Text
The Sword and Shield (BC x Reader)
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Genre: Fluff, Idol AU, Quarantine fiction
Pairing: Bangchan x Reader
Warnings: Innuendos, nerdy Pokémon talk.
Summary: Every warrior needs a sword and shield to defend themselves against enemies. However, two nerds take up weapons in a vastly different fight. 
Masterlist
Credits for the banner art go to Satzzz Art.
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Life between the sheets does not always have to be characterized by Sensuality because there is more to be found among the pillows and blankets. It is amiable comfort, dozing off together to the sunrays streaming in through the light bedroom curtains or listening to music while sharing earbuds to kill the boredom of quarantine by means of occupying oneself with whatever is at hand. After all, it is yet unknown for how long the global population is forbidden to leave their homes safe for retrieving necessities at the supermarket or drugstore.
A blessing in disguise, however, is being able to spend the period of restriction with a bunch of lively lads which includes the lover of little more than a year. The moment it became known countries were hauling in their own residents a foolhardy decision was made to remain in South-Korea and leave the life in the place of origin behind for a while. The choice did not sit well with Chan at first, not too subtly asking to reconsider it though soon finding a secret delight in finally being able to wake up every day in the same bed.
No thousands of kilometres distance.
No time to be taken away by management and time zone differences.
The pandemic has at least given us this.
A taste of life as a real couple.
 Just before IKEA closed as well, the lovable human kangaroo insisted on going there for the last shopping spree so personal taste could be added to the bedroom that would be shared. The well-meant idea was rejected at first, saying it was not needed and that the interior was fine as it was. However, once bleached locks have set their mind to something, it is barely possible to change the focus of determination and thus the private shared space has been decorated with a few candles alongside a new bookcase to house whichever books were already taken from home as well as a few pieces of art and a collection of postcards that have been pinned on a metal grate.
Our perfect little nest.
A haven of comfort for songs and nerdy thoughts.
‘Hey, babygirl.’ The mattress dips as the human koala joins the small kingdom in the sheets of sweatpants and loose tops that are somehow still deemed charming. Even the surface beneath the minimal layer of makeup is apparently preferred by the strong arm wrapping around the waist as platinum locks rest on the head and watch the screen held between hands. ‘What’re you playing?’
‘Pokémon Sword. It’s really good thus far and- Oh my god, it’s so cute!’ In an instance, the screen is lifted to show the six adorable balls clad in armor, a new creature which is called a Falinks. ‘Look at these little buddies!’
A wide smile breaks out on plush lips, wavy locks shaking in closed-eyed amusement before looking up again with the wonder of a new discovery. ‘So that’s why you’ve been kicking the air or screaming something is cute. I didn’t know you were a Pokémon fan?’
‘I have been since I was little, but it’s not something I tell others about.’ The true meaning of the grin no longer passes under the radar, igniting an ember of shame for harbouring a geeky side when it comes to the Japanese creatures. ‘Yes, I know, I am a mega nerd. Bite me.’
The jaw clenched in timidity relaxes when slender fingers tickle the sides as a big nose presses into the side of the neck to nuzzle it. The comment was not meant to provoke although the lowered voice suggests otherwise as it speaks against skin, teeth even cheekily nibbling. ‘Watch your words, Y/N, or I just might.’
However, the sensuous attitude fades as fast as it appeared as irises the colour of pure chocolate wander back to the device. ‘Can I see your Pokémon?’
Because the girl in the sheets is not the only trainer beneath the roof. 
‘Sure.’ With the same nonchalance that denies the suggestiveness from a second ago, the index of the creatures which are currently being trained is opened. The current team consists of a Corviknight, Obstagoon, Thievul, Drapion, Boltund and Cinderace. ‘I’m currently training these though I mostly specialize in Dark Types.’
‘Why doesn’t that surprise me?’ To get more comfortable, Chan slouches further down the bed to rest more properly on a beloved narrow shoulder. Nevertheless, the all-knowing grin from before remains plastered onto plush lips. ‘I suppose you’re also interested in training Ghost and Psychic types as well?’
‘I’m an open book, aren’t I?’
‘Just a little bit.’ The teasing is made up for with a chaste peck on the nose followed by one on the forehead. Just the way it is preferred and done whenever apologizing for something or to simply gain a smile. Withal, now, judging by the twinkle in mischievous eyes, it is definitely to say sorry in advance for what is to come. ‘Can you guess what my type is?’
‘Me?’
The witty response evokes the bubbly boyish laughter that has been loved ever since the first time it was heard. ‘You’re not wrong.’
‘Okay, okay, let me think.’ The scanning for clues on the face results in nothing except a brighter devilish glimmer in a loving look. Henceforth, the answer will have to based on personality and all the little things that have been discovered since being in a relationship and now prematurely living together. ‘Electric? Although, no, wait. Fire. Something tells me you at least have a Growlith or had but it has transformed into Arcanine. Then again, judging by that splendid performance of the theme song in your VLive, I’d also wager you have a Pikachu. However, you’re very sporty so maybe you specialize in Fighting types?’
‘You’re on the right track. The answer is somewhere in there.’ Instead of one mocking eyebrow, two rise in a failed attempt to exaggerate coyness while looking cool. ‘Or is it?’
‘Very helpful, Chris.’ Sarcastically disregarding the useless remark and lopsided smirk, the former ramble is composed into a somewhat solid answer. Anywhere close to the truth is better than nothing. ‘You’re a Fire trainer who is also interested in Fighting types.’
‘Almost. I’m a Dragon trainer who always starts out as a Fire trainer. I am, however, also interested in Fighting types too. I do have an Arcanine and Pikachu is an exception to the rule because it’s Pikachu. Every trainer should have one.’
‘I have one too, but it doesn’t have a name since it’s a female and I only name my male Pokémon.’
Focus shifts back to the screen, Chan reading the names of the amiable creatures that form the company on the journey to becoming the best. It started as a fun idea and the names matched fairly well. ‘So I’ve noticed. Are you associating everyone in the industry with a Pokémon?’
But nothing ever runs smoothly. 
‘I’m trying, but it’s bloody hard at times. I made Jackson a Pidove. Don’t laugh! I don’t know why I did it, but his name was the first to pop up when I caught it. Baekhyun is an Applin. Wait, he’s transformed already so now he’s a Flapple. Han is a Greedent because, let’s be honest, he’s a squirrel. Changbin, well, Bin is a Corviknight. I gave his full name to a Rufflet. Minho is a Sneasel, Felix a Thievul and I have yet to decide on the rest of the boys.’
‘Which one would be me?’ Judging by the suggestive tone of curious eyes and barely noticeable pout, there is the clear hope of a comparison with an awesome creature. The tightened grip on the hips betrays it too, blatantly so. Almost forcing the unknown comparison to one’s personal preference. 
‘Without a doubt, you are Zacian, the giant warrior wolf with a sword in its mouth.’ A deep sigh cannot be helped at the thought of the game’s challenge which does absolutely not allow for failure. ‘The legendary Pokémon of the Galar region. Dammit, Channie! Why do you have to be so elusive and exclusive?’
‘Because I’m an amazing catch.’ The cheek is turned by slender fingers, compelling lips to join in a playful giggly kiss which is broken up by a smug remark. ‘And warriors are not so easily bound to a master. You told me even Beowulf reluctantly helped a king, only to settle his father’s debt. 
‘Although,’ the train of thought is easily altered by hooking a digit under the silver necklace that was given as a birthday present, pulling the tease in yet holding off from melting into another kiss by backing away to continue the battle of wits and enjoy the small adorable whine of disagreement, ‘with the right trainer, I suppose I could make a deal.’
‘I plan on winning all gym badges and make myself worthy of the wolf.’
‘You will still have to win in that final fight. Until then, think you can take me on?’ Brows furrow in a suddenly hard-fought battle for concentrated control. Funnily contradicting oneself, the domestic koala shifts positions to hover over the coy soul who was able to tame the beast beneath the roof, faces inches apart and the Switch tucked in the small space between bodies.  
Which becomes noticeably narrower when transforming Innocence into Sensuality by creating the image of what might be given after testing out the waters of victory and win in a Pokémon battle. ‘I have more than enough times in this bed.’
To make up for the victory and erase any negative unspoken feelings. 
Though the soft growling suggests impatience, unwilling to be kept on a leash any longer. ‘Don’t change the subject. You’re fighting unfairly.’
‘Am I?’ The device is put aside on the bedside table, ankles hooking behind the waist to coax a hard shape into the warmth between the thighs as hands rest on broad shoulders. A much-appreciated action evidently, breath taken away by the friction between two concealed forms of wanting and nails digging into the skin beneath the comfy black printed fleece vest.
And the chest now making escape entirely impossible, hearts racing in harmony. ‘Yes. You’re distracting me.’
‘Says the person who’s distracting me from gaining those badges.’ Enough coherency lingers to remain cheeky. Bashful enough to lean in and utter a final double-sided statement of defiance. ‘I bet I can easily best you.’
But two can play that game, apparently. 
‘I think you’re wrong, babygirl. Or do I need to remind you of how good I am?’
‘Grab your Switch and bring it on.’ The challenge is accepted with a scoff which clearly started having different expectations in regards to the order of events. Fortunately, a sweet quick peck cures most of the shallow grumpiness as Chris is dismissed from the sheets. ‘And give me all you’ve got.’
‘Oh, I will. I always do.’
As became apparent in the few battles between teams.
The wolfish actions that followed unspoken hard feelings unhappy with the outcomes of the fights.
And a broken headboard in the morning.
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mysmashplaythroughs · 4 years
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Pikachu Playthrough (Fire Red)
Fighter: Pikachu
Game: Pokemon Fire Red, Game Boy Advance. First Released on January 29th 2004.
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Fighter Bio.
Pikachu is a species of Electric Mouse Pokemon which is the evolved form of Pichu and evolves into Raichu through the use of a Thunderstone. It is found most often in forests but also has been seen in urban environments such as towns and power plants. Pikachus raise their tails in order to monitor their surroundings and have been known to use their electric power to shock berries in order to tenderise them so they can eat them. They store electricity in the pouches on their cheeks and when many Pikachu gather, they can build their electricity to the point they can cause lightning storms. Pikachus charge electricity as they sleep and therefore will be weaker if they have been unable to rest. A Pikachu holding a light ball, an item that only it can use, will have its special and attack power doubled which can make it stronger without evolving. Pikachus sometimes tend to have a rivalry with their evolved form Raichu and have been known to refuse to evolve.
There have been a few specific notable Pikachu in the game series, the most famous being Red’s Pikachu who has been the highest level Pokemon in the game series used by an NPC. Cosplay Pikachu is another specific Pikachu, in this case a female Pikachu who can be dressed in different ways. Outside of the game series, Pikachu owes most of its fame to the anime series where it is the main character (who is based on Red) Ash’s starter Pokemon and is the only Pokemon that has travelled with him through every series. Due to this, Pikachu is considered the mascot of the entire Pokemon series with it often receiving a new variant, move or form in each Generation of Pokemon.
Crossovers with other Smash characters: As with many Pokemon there haven’t really been any crossovers of Pikachu appearing in other game series. The closest to any sort of crossover is Mario vs Wario being referenced on a tv screen in the Copy Cat’s house in Saffron City. It’s an interesting coincidence that this city is also the one where the Pokemon stage for Super Smash Bros 64 takes place.
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Why this game?
I decided to go for this game with regards to Pikachu for a couple of reasons. The first and simplest reason is that this is its debut generation with it being from the Kanto Pokedex. I chose Fire Red as I find Fire Red and Leaf Green to be the best versions of Gen 1 to play, with them having the majority of improvements that had been made to the series by the time it had reached the GBA as well as having a lot more content available such as the Sevii Isles and Pikachu’s pre-evolution Pichu for example which wasn’t in the original game. I also have a lot of nostalgia for these versions of the games which I will detail in Pokemon Trainer’s (Red) post later when it comes to the game specifically. There are later games that would have been just as good to have Pikachu on the team in, however the reason I went for this specifically is that a lot of Super Smash Bros Pokemon content is influenced by the anime, with Pikachu being based a fair bit on Ash’s Pikachu. Therefore, I felt as Pokemon Fire Red is the story of Red’s journey that it made the most sense that my choice for the game to represent Red’s Pikachu, which was based somewhat on Ash’s Pikachu. Finally I’d like to note, I did play Pokemon Yellow later on my list which has Pikachu as the starter and is based on the anime more, however as I wanted to go for the game which is more in line with the overall game canon I decided to stick with this choice for the standard Super Smash Bros Pikachu.
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My past with this Pokemon.
So I suppose, although I have long denied it, Pikachu is in a sense my favourite Pokemon of all time. The reason for this is not because of Pikachu as such however, but because my favourite Pokemon of all time is Raichu. As I personally tend to look at Pokemon as the whole evolutionary line overall by extension it would make Pikachu and Pichu (and definitely Alolan Raichu) my favourite Pokemon also. When it comes to me specifically with Raichu, back when I was in school and Pokemon was becoming extremely popular, I remember for some time I hated it, mostly as it was everywhere and I guess I was determined to be a non-conformist. I’ve always been a big fan of figurines however, and I remember when I was at school, seeing someone with a Raichu figure, which really interested me. I forget now but I think I asked them a fair bit about it and they let me have a look at it. I always put that down as the moment I decided to finally give in and look at Pokemon, granted knowing how much of a Nintendo fanboy I am I know it was inevitable I’d probably have looked into it regardless, still I’ve just always found Raichu cool, and that it was the less popular evolution of Pikachu appealed even more to the non-conformist in me I guess. Since then I’ve always been a huge fan of Raichu and I’ll admit it’s made me somewhat tired of Pikachu getting all the glory, so when Raichu finally got something new with its Alolan form I was ecstatic.
Anyway, that’s enough about Raichu, when it comes to Pikachu, I think my favourite element of it has always been that despite its popularity, overall it’s not a huge draw in the games. Pikachu has over the years seen various upgrades such as the Light Ball which powers it up, various alternate forms and unique moves, however in the original Red and Blue it was a fairly simple Pokemon that was somewhat uncommon and would appear not too far into the game, in Viridian Forest. I think that’s always been my favourite aspect of Pikachu when it comes down to it, that it’s not a special event Pokemon, or even a starter Pokemon (barring games like Pokemon Yellow of course) but really just a cute and fairly useful Pokemon you can come across or just totally ignore if you want. I’ve personally often caught a Pikachu during my playthroughs of Gen 1 not just as I want Raichu, but I’ve just always liked finding it, it’s the main thing I tend to look out for in Viridian Forest really. Despite all I’ve said here, I did like however the starter Pikachu in Pokemon Yellow who follows you around, to the point as a kid I’ll admit I’d have a Pikachu plush that I’d like to pretend to go on adventures with. I guess my final comment on Pikachu is simply that whilst I like the current design, I’ve always preferred the chubbier Pikachu design, which coincidentally was the design used in the very first Super Smash Bros before the later games went with the more streamlined version.
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My Smash Playthrough.
My Pikachu was Level 56 when I finished the game, with a Bold nature and having been met in Viridian Forest at Level 3. It has the ability Static and the moves Thundershock, Quick Attack, Thunderbolt and Thunder. I remember due to its unevolved form it would struggle a fair bit later in the game with its low defences. If it could pull off an attack however it could still do a fair bit of damage so it didn’t struggle as much as some of the other Pokemon I used in the playthrough. The Elite 4 were the biggest challenge as they often are, however more so in this playthrough than usual due to me using a fair few unevolved Pokemon. Pikachu was able to hold its own against certain Pokemon due to its type advantage following a lot of training, taking down a fair few of Lorelei’s Pokemon and doing well against Gyarados. Beyond this however there aren’t a lot of events related to Pikachu I can remember in this specific playthrough.
Specific aspects about the game relating to Pikachu in Smash.
When it comes to Pokemon it’s usually not too difficult to replicate their portrayal in Super Smash Bros. Pikachu had the moves Thundershock, Quick Attack, Thunderbolt and Thunder in my playthrough of Fire Red. Thunder and Quick Attack are directly used by Pikachu in Super Smash Bros, however in the Smash series, Pikachu uses an attack called Thunder Jolt which does not exist in the Pokemon series. Due to the attack not doing a lot of damage I therefore felt that Thundershock was the best alternative for it. When it comes to Pikachu’s other move from Super Smash Bros, Skull Bash, this move is only learned by Pikachu in Gen 1, and is not available for it in Fire Red. Due to this, I felt that the best move to give Pikachu based on its attacks in Super Smash Bros was Thunderbolt, which I feel can be seen as a stand-in for Pikachu’s forward smash attack, where it releases a large orb of electricity right in front of it from its cheeks, causing more damage than Thunder Jolt and therefore I felt matched Thunder Bolt. I can see the argument due to Pikachu’s forward smash being more close range that it should be a physical rather than special electric attack, however the only physical electric attacks I know of all involve Pikachu charging forward, except for Nuzzle which matches the description but does very little damage and is more used to paralyse opponents, something the forward smash doesn’t do. Volt Tackle, Pikachu’s final smash is only available through breeding and therefore I felt would require me to use a different Pikachu to the one I would use throughout the game’s story, so I decided against going for that set up. Finally, when it comes to matching the aesthetic of the Super Smash Bros version of Pikachu, I used a regular Pokeball to catch it, which is what is used when Pikachu enters battles in Super Smash Bros.
I would like to note that in later playthroughs of other games, I have managed to specifically replicate the Pikachu from Super Smash Bros, by bringing one from the Virtual Console release of Pokemon Blue to Sword and Shield, meaning it was able to learn Thunder Bolt, Quick Attack, Skull Bash and Thunder. This Pikachu is the closest in setup to the Super Smash Bros incarnation and is the one pictured in the screenshot from Pokemon Ultra Moon in this post which it was in before I transferred it to Pokemon Sword. With that said, the Pikachu I have been talking about in this playthrough of Fire Red is the closest I could get to playing through Gen 1’s story with Super Smash Bros Pikachu overall.
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Credits.
For information on this game including dates of releases I must give credit to Bulbapedia.
The screenshots in this post are taken by me using Pokemon Ultra Moon and Let’s Go Pikachu, the reason why is because I am unable to get screenshots of Game Boy Advance games which weren’t ported to Wii U, also the events of Let’s Go take place in Kanto, so I felt they were the best alternative.
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theangrypokemaniac · 5 years
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I followed you for the pics and gifs but I didn't know why you were so annoying till I saw the username. Btw have you ever seen Digimon? Because evolutions are supposed to have SOME resemblance to their own species. An Articuno cannot evolve into a Cubone for example.
Oh, you smooth-talking nonny.
I'm glad you like the pictures and GIFS. You're welcome to any that take your fancy.
The clue is in the name, flower. I'm not 'The Perfectly-Contented-With-How-Things-Are-Thank-You-Very-Much Pokémaniac'. My chosen nom de guerre does warn the reader of what awaits.
I don't intend to annoy you. I simply speak as I find. If you don't like it, rest assured the matters I complain about are punishment enough for me.
I'm from a wave of fan in which many found Johto substandard. Compared to them I'm quite mild. I appear to be the one naysayer because everyone who thinks like me is mostly gone.
Always remember that the series you enjoy only came about via the destruction of ours, and, in turn, your day will come too.
If you're still a fan ten years from now, you'll have watched all the things you love the most shredded, whilst the next generation will sing its praises.
You will not comprehend the appeal, they won't understand your resentment. Think of me then.  
Yes I have seen Digimon. Not that I know what that has to do with it. I mean, Gatomon doesn't resemble Angewomon, nor Gomamon to Ikkakumon, and so on.
The point is these aren't evolutions in the correct sense. Were they from the same generation, it's all well and good to display similarity, not that it's a given (Magikarp and Gyarados, Flaafy and Ampharos etc.), but when there's a gap of years, even decades, between the original and a new one suddenly materialising from the ether, it's silly to pretend there's a connection.
They just weren't built to have belated relatives superglued into their D.N.A., but it's become like bloody Buckeroo, with these weary beasts of burden constantly laden with yet more biological junk.
How on earth is a baby going to have remained unknown until now, if we're to believe it's a real world? Chansey's from Kanto, so how can Happiny not be there too?
I don't particular understand the logic of every region requiring a Pikachu clone, as if it's a necessary presence to draw our attention.
Pikachu was new once, but the rest aren't, and there's no explanatory relationship between he and them, thus why should laziness be celebrated?
When Pokémon are invented, it's in the mind frame of them following a fixed evolutionary line, so for example, at the start of Golem's life, it was on the basis that he came from Graveler, and Geodude previously, and that's all.
Do you imagine that Game Freak drew him, thinking:
Yeah, but in the fyewchuh, he'll have a fine black moustache, a 'tache I tells thee!
If it was such an inspired addition, you'd expect them to include it then, but funnily enough, they didn't.
The examples I've selected are particular egregious, since I'd hardly call them redesigns, rather blatant facsimiles.
There's less variety between these than there is with proper chains. At least they sometimes change colour (like Psyduck to Golduck).
If you'd never heard of Octillery, and I showed you its picture, and asked you to guess what it used to be, out of them all, would you immediately pick Remoraid?
No, I doubt it, but I bet a person with no knowledge of Pokémon could work out there's a link between Tangela and Tangrowth, since they're almost identical.
There are four generations between Mewtwo and his Megas: do you seriously imagine there was any prior intention to change him?
One Mega Evolution is bad enough, but two is beyond absurd.
Mewtwo is synthetic, and thus unacknowledged by nature, so how then can Mega Stones exist that react to him?
He's a recent creation, and unique, so how would anything matching his genetics be around?
Mega Evolution in itself is stupid.
If it's so impressive, it must be famous, so how come no one used it before Ash went to Kalos?
I accept that 'new' things appear every generation, but the writers have the habit of retconning events to pretend it's always been around, thereby erasing actual canon, such as pretending later monsters existed when Ash left home. If they do that I'll pick fault when I see it.
Remember the hysterical fuss at the arrival of Megas, the hyperventilating wheeze about it being a revolutionary concept that toe-tah-lee changed everything?
Well that didn't work out, did it?
I thought it was asinine then, and lo and behold, Nintendo eventually concurred, whereupon this oh-so dazzling concept was dumped without ceremony, but I expect it'll be back come Gen. 9 (Keenan and Kel), just as Formes (as it then was) were dropped for Unova and Kalos.
Once the close of an era arrives, the self-congratulatory attitude for birthing such sweet divinity vanishes, the 'precious' facet no longer matters and it's the next fad deserving hosannas.
Well the pattern has formed, and if I know they'll eventually tire of the ultra-amazing best thing EVA, what's the point in me trying to like it, when, as evidenced by their latter-day lack of interest, it clearly is worthless?
With both Megas and now Gigantamax, gratitude is demanded of the fans. Nintendo expect us to be overawed at being fed more of the same.
A big Meowth is still a Meowth, as in a twenty-year-old character. Why should passing off old stuff as fresh impress me?
Why should I like childhood favourites picked at and distorted to flog yet another generation of games that apparently can't stand by themselves?
Why can't they?
Who are these bastards in charge they believe they've the talent to 'improve' classic figures when they can't even invent anything remotely as memorable themselves?
Otherwise, why is it still Kanto Pokémon on merchandise?
If Mega Evolution and Gigantamax are so overwhelming, they ought to be independently successful, by which I mean that, at first anyway, only Kalos Pokémon should've received Megas, and the same for Galar and Gigas. After all, they're wondrous, so can obviously sell itself.
But no.
It's not Forms, Megas and Gigas making past Pokémon special, it's the opposite.
Worst of all, any region heavy on the rehash claims that as an excuse to skimp on new Pokémon. Kalos and Alola both have fewer than one hundred; you have to put 'em together to just scrape beyond the first tally of 151.
If it isn't an absence of imagination responsible, why is there such a drought? Why don't they conjure 150-200 Pokémon, and then add Megas or whatever on top?
Megas aren't even 'proper' Pokémon, so it can't constitute an overload. If it does, chuck them and retain the original ones.
How hard is it to come up with new Pokémon? Even I've done it, it's that easy!
It makes you wonder why they think we'll be happier with the familiar than whatever they can drag together.
When we do get different faces, they're padded to bursting with copies, like 400 Vivillon, as if that suffices.
This modern breed of writer just can't keep his hands to himself. If not practicing any of the aforementioned imitations, he's prodding the rest so all the males and females need tiny identifying dots or lumps, like lady Pikachu with a cleft tail, thereby undermining all the times the anime showed them as indistinguishable from one another.
It's as if they can't resist marking their territory by pissing all over canon.
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cupofsorrows · 5 years
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A Conceptual Post About Pokémon as D&D Monsters
I know, I know, it’s been done before, but I’ve been having a lot of ideas about D&D lately and it occurred to me that it might be fun to try to adapt Pokemon to the standard dnd setting(s) - that is, not just copying them wholesale as in, “you open the dungeon door and see a pikachu” but taking the concept of the creature and placing it in your world as something that genuinely belonged there. Like, say, You confront your party with a large turtle-monster that sprays high-powered water jets as its primary mode of attack. It’s essentially a blastoise, but that isn’t what it’s called and it doesn’t necessarily have to follow the rules that an actual blastoise would in the pokemon games. I’ve seen pokemon stat block writeups before, but they’re usually pretty straightforward “this is a psyduck” type deals, and what I’m interested in is retooling the monster to fit in a different world (while keeping the core of it intact). What’s it called (if it has a different name)? Where does it come from in your world, and where does it live? If the original had evolutions, does this version? Lots of potential there. To that end, here are a few pokemon that I think have particularly interesting concepts:
Phantump: Honestly all of the ghost pokemon have interesting concepts but I didn’t want to have a disproportionate number of ghost-types so I chose this one. Core concept is a furtive little forest spirit that uses old tree stumps (or perhaps fallen logs) as surrogate bodies/protective shells. Canon lore says they’re supposedly the spirits of children who died in the forest, so take or leave that as you please. Now, none of these suggestions have to look exactly like their inspirations as long as they convey the idea - for instance I sort of imagine these guys as little humanoid figures made of gnarled wood, which also gives me distinct skull-kid-from-LoZ vibes (but maybe that should be a separate post...)
Heliolisk: I don’t really know what drew me to this critter in particular, except that ‘solar-powered lizard that can shoot electricity and stuff’ is just a good creature to put in a made-up world (probably in a desert region). It even has “-lisk” in its name, like the more infamous basilisk, so it already sounds like it SHOULD be a mythical creature. As I’m writing this I realize that it strongly resembles the already-in-dnd shocker lizard, but come on, this thing is way more badass. Also I was just reading about it on Bulbapedia and apparently it can run super-fast? so... that’s in there, too.
Snorlax or Slaking: Look I just like the concept of a big hairy beast that’s super strong but spends almost all of its time asleep. Not even sure that would affect its stats but it’s great flavor.
Zygarde: A host of tiny organisms - maybe even single-celled - which can come together to form larger gestalt creatures (most famously a massive serpent/worm, but even more powerful forms may be possible). Should be a very powerful, possibly unique, individual, since it is a legendary pokemon.
Dhelmise: Sentient algae that uses marine detritus as a ‘skeleton’? The ghost type delivers again! I imagine that before humans were responsible for so much stuff being in the ocean these must have used a lot of animal bones (and maybe some driftwood) instead.
Seismitoad: I think there are already frog monsters with sonic attacks, but that was only half of the appeal for me here, the other half being ‘large bipedal frog’. I hold this as being very different from bullywugs, grippli, or any other amphibian-based humanoids: While froglike, those are all still fundamentally types of people, whereas this beast is first and foremost a frog. A frog that walks upright and has opposable thumbs. This also works with poliwhirl/poliwrath and croagunk/toxicroak, but then the sonic/vibration stuff won this one out for me by a slim margin. (Addendum: I have come to the realization that seismitoad and croagunk don’t actually have opposable thumbs according to their artwork. Whatever, just fudge it.)
Tropius: This one’s just plain weird. Like, almost exeggcutor-level weird (dang, maybe I should have chosen exeggcutor instead. But tropius is less famously weird. Side note: what’s up with pokemon based on palmlike plants?) It’s part small sauropod dinosaur, part banana tree, and while I’m not sure whether it should be classified as a plant or not, I do know that it can definitely fly. Also, it produces delicious fruit you can eat!
Parasect: You probably figured I was going to mention this one. Everyone thinks of paras and parasect when they think of pokemon with weird but cool concepts. MY take is that the fungus could infest different types of giant vermin, perhaps making it the basis for a template. Or not; these are just suggestions. Do whatever.
Larvesta and Volcarona: Maybe I’m just on a kick from all the GKOTM fanart I’ve been seeing, but giant fire-spitting caterpillar + giant fiery moth adult seems like a creature idea worth exploring. Larvesta also takes longer to evolve than any other stage-one pokemon, which I see as representing a long time spent in larval form (or pupated), which in turn resembles kaiju’s long periods of ‘dormancy’, bringing us back to Mothra (as all things must). Also, I think larvesta/volcarona are the only bug/fire types in the whole series so far? That’s nuts to me but it just makes them even more special.
Abra: Honestly the way this guy looks is like 90% of the appeal for me here. Abra looks like an armadillo tried to evolve into a monkey and somehow ended up with psychic powers in the process. It levitates and teleports, and according to the lore it’s usually asleep but thanks to its psychic powers is still aware of its surroundings. That’s right, its eyes aren’t really narrow, they’re just closed all the time. Do any images of abra with its eyes open exist? If they do, are we prepared to see them? As always, don’t feel like you have to give any of these guys evolved forms just because they evolve in the games. I’m definitely not saying this here specifically because I like abra’s design more than its evolutions, no sir.
Pinsir or Heracross: Pretty much the same as with the toads a few entries above. Clearly not people, but just vaguely reminiscent enough to maybe be just a little unsettling. C’mon, I know they’re cute in the games and the show but tell me you wouldn’t be at least slightly perturbed if you saw a real-life beetle the size of a 10-year-old trundling around on two legs. Even if you thought it was rad as hell you’d still get out of there pretty quick if it started trundling towards you.
Slowpoke: Listen if you don’t get the appeal of a semi-aquatic, ambiguously mammalian quadruped that has psychic capabilities but is also comically oblivious to external stimuli then I just don’t know what to tell you.
Barbaracle: Colonial organism sort of like Zygarde, except the individual parts are bigger. It could even be modular, with the various ‘limbs’ combining in different ways, although that could also complicate the stat block.
Gothitelle: Conceptually I suppose this is just another humanoid psychic creature, but a while ago I saw someone point out how its frills and whatnot are sort of reminiscent of a sea slug, and damned if ‘anthropomorphic nudibranch’ doesn’t get my blood flowing.
Rapidash: Pretty simple, a unicorn variant/non-evil fire horse. Who wouldn’t want one of those?
Necrozma: I never actually played Sun and Moon 2, nor did I get too deep into the postgame ultra beast stuff in SuMo 1, so regrettably I missed out on a lot of the wonderful interdimensional weirdness. While each ultra beast is appealing in its own way, Necrozma is practically a Lovecraftian Great Old One already what with how it was once an interstellar being of heat and light but was somehow injured or depleted and has now become a completely different creature that travels from world to world absorbing all light. That’s a pretty raw concept for any story, let alone a cute kid’s game. And it’s always a plus when something can be cool and threatening while still being safe for a G rating! You could also do what SuMo2 did and take your heroes to a world that’s already had its light stolen by the beast, to explore how the inhabitants of that world have been affected as well as show what awaits the heroes’ world... or just as a nice change of scenery. Lastly there’s the possibility that Necrozma must ultimately be defeated not through violence, but by figuring out how to restore it to its original form. It isn’t too often that the cosmic monstrosity could actually use your help, and it might leave the PCs feeling like they really accomplished something epic. Alternately, it returning to its original form also makes a great homage to the multiple forms of every JRPG final boss ever, a trope that has been under-represented in D&D for TOO LONG.
...and that’s it, at least for now. Naturally, there are about a thousand other possibilities, including different ways of interpreting the examples I’ve provided here. I suppose they could also be used for purposes besides D&D, although if you’re going to put any of this in the fantasy novel you’ve been working on I suggest you be extra diligent in obfuscating the creatures’ actual origins so as to avoid a visit from any lawyers. I don’t know if anybody is actually even going to see this post at all, but if it does end up getting around, then I fully encourage all of you to put your own spins on this if you’re inspired to do so! I’d love to see what other people might come up with.
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livian-lucifenia · 5 years
Text
The Proposal
Green likes things to be extravagant.
So, Red gives him just that.
_________
Another year, another tournament.
Green's been there and done that. It's honestly getting a bit old at this point. The battles, anyway. The roar of the crowds, the cameras, the lights, the TV interviews... that's what he was really here for. That electric feeling of having adoring fans scream at you, hoping their voice is the one you hear out of hundereds, if not thousands, of others. It inspires him to give a good show while on the battlefield.
Autographs were another thing Green thoroughly enjoyed. He signs everything with a practiced, flowing cursive that looked perfect no matter how fast his hand moved. Red had asked if he studied calligraphy just so he could give good autographs, he laughed it off, but never denied it (so what if he did? His handwriting had improved because of it, so what's the big deal?).
Even though Green was a showoff, there was one thing he hid during each tournament.
His realationship with Red.
They had been together for a few years now, and were living together in Viridian. Surprisingly, no one had caught on to anything yet. However, he and Red had recently decided that they want to go public. Mainly because neither of them had even told their families or friends.
And as in typical Green fashion, he wanted to make this announcement at the tournament during one of their interviews.
Red had tried to convince him otherwise, but he knew his boyfriend wouldn't stand down on an idea like this. So, he improvised.
On the last night of the tournament, Red and Green were to battle each other. Green thought it was his idea, but Red had already made the arrangements long before the tournament even began.
After they were lead away to separate entrances of the arena, Red did one last check of his supplies before being called over for a microphone check.
Green hadn't been expecting to receive a headset with a microphone. When he asked what it was for, all he had been told was that they were requested. Nevertheless, Green would definitely use this to his advantage.
As they readied him to be sent out to the arena, he couldn't help but smile. He was going to be battling his boyfriend, which was nothing new, but something about this seemed special. He absolutely had to give it his all.
Red was called out first. He did his usual small wave and readjusted his hat to block out some of the overhead lights. He stood silently with his hands in his pockets and Pikachu- who was making faces at the audience- on his shoulder.
When Green was called out, he stood up straighter and smiled brightly at the crowd as Eevee jumped around at his feet.
Once the cheering had calmed down, and their mics were turned on, Green smirked at Red, "Why did they even give you a mic if you're not gonna talk?"
Red shrugged, followed by a motion to come closer.
"Is this even allowed? I thought trainers couldn't pass the center line. Red, are trying to get me disqualified?"
The crowd laughed as Green made a show of walking towards the center of the battlefield, complaining the whole way.
The referee walked over to them as they stopped at the center line, "Due to the special circumstances of this battle, you are permitted to cross the center line."
Green looked at him as he walked away, "Special circumstances?", he sighed loudly, "Red, what did you do?"
The crowd laughed again while Pikachu and Eevee ran off to play.
Red looked at him, smirking, "I didn't do anything. Nothing bad, anyway."
The crowd erupted with the screams of thousands of fangirls and fanboys.
"He speaks!", Green said, "But, seriously, what are you up to?"
Red stepped closer, taking one hand out of his pocket, "I have something to ask you."
"Really? And what is it?"
In all of his years to come, Red is certain he will always remember the look on his boyfriend's face when he knelt down on one knee in front of him. Even though the crowd was deafening, all he could focus on was Green, who had covered his mouth in shock. He could see tears forming in his eyes as he pulled the ring out of his pocket and smiled up at him, "Green Oak, will you marry me?"
Green let out a shuddering breath that the mic didn't pick up. He blinked, tears falling from his eyes, and nodded, "Y-Yes... Yes!"
Red felt his own eyes beginning to water as he smiled brightly and stood. He gently took hold of Green's left hand and slipped the ring into place on his finger. They both looked at it for a moment before Green pulled him in for a tight hug.
The audience cheered for them as they pulled away far enough to go in for a short kiss.
Green pressed his forehead against Red's shoulder, "I love you."
Red smiled, tightening his hold around Green's waist, "I love you, too."
At some point, their mics had been switched off, and Green was thankful for that, or else everyone would have heard his whispered promise to really show Red how much he loves him once they got back to the hotel.
After a few minutes of them embracing while the crowd continued to freak out, Red spoke, "Hey, you still wanna battle?"
Green lifted his head, "You know it! I'm gonna kick your ass!"
Red laughed, "I'd love to see you try!"
____________
Found this one attached onto the end of a completely different fic. I think it may have been based on a weird dream I had?? It's been like 4 years since I've opened the file, so I really dunno.
I was supposed to post this days ago, but I have been kinda preoccupied with Sword. If anything is fucky, overlook it bc I'm currently playing with my new Phantump and Snom.
Also!
I'm gonna be traveling and visiting family this weekend and next week, and won't be able to play games while I'm out, so send me some asks, Nameless/Originalshipping (or Palletshipping!!) content, or feel free to go through my blog and add on to something I've posted.
(Pls do. It would save me from awkward conversations about me still being single / my sexuality / gender identity.)
Have a good day-night!!💜💜💜
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grayhyacinth · 5 years
Text
The Final Show
Ship: Kaminari X Jirou from BNHA
Description: The final year at UA also concludes Jirou's band. With her music, can she reach Kaminari's heart with her final performance?
Author's words: I absolutely ADORE this ship! I regret making it long... I also uploaded it to my ao3 account, click here! I made a banner :P
Warnings: Cussing
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Jirou was beyond ecstatic for her final year at UA! Especially since her goal at becoming a Pro Hero was just around the corner. Unfortunately, there were some obstacles that obscured her path.
For instance, every 3rd year student at UA had to decide their future. Such as going to college, joining an agency, finding mentors, and finding a trustworthy insurance company-- to fix any damage that might happen while working.
For Jirou, this was a walk in the park! She had planned-- months prior, that she was going to mentor under Present Mic before joining an agency.
Although she laid down her future path, Jirou was like any students in her year. Apprehensive. But not for the reason that you may think.
The purple-hair girl had started a band in the middle of her first year, that had grown sensationally! Reaching many thrilling hits and succeeding in several genres, Jirou was extremely proud to have been the leader.
But all of that was coming to an end.
Bakugou was going on to bigger and higher platforms that would no doubt, make him the number one hero; Yaoyoruzu was going to be a huge publicity hero and make herself known in the public eye; Tokoyami was going to train up in the mountains for years, before coming back into the city; and Kaminari? Well, the big doofus was going to join Kirishima and mentor under Fat Gum, who unfortunately had to put up with both of their stupidity.
These were all wonderful and exciting futures for her friends, but why did she feel sad?
Jirou was scribbling down lyric ideas into her notebook when suddenly, a body collided into her desk.
"Hey!"
"Ah! Sorry, Jirou!!" Kaminari grinned widely at her, before throwing another fake punch at Kirishima.
"Pshhhh... It isn't manly of you to disturb a lady while she's busy, Denki."
"Hah!" Kaminari landed a punch before Kirishima activated his hardening quirk. "It's not my fault! You're the one who push me into the desk!"
Jirou rolled her eyes at their bizarre antics and picked up her notebook, shuffling over to Yaoyoruzu's desk.
"They really do share one brain cell, huh, Momo?"
"Hm?" Yaoyoruzu barely lifted her head to greet Jirou, too engrossed in her own notebook to pay attention.
Jirou frowned. "Heeeeeeey, earth to Momo?"
As if on cue, the black-hair girl snapped out of her concentration and fully faced her friend with an apologetic smile.
"S-Sorry about that!! I really need to get more sleep these days..." Yaoyoruzu trailed off. She then shook her head once more and lifted up her notebook, showing a design of a hero suit.
"I was thinking about changing my costume," she said sheepishly. "Do you think this is too... girly?"
"Girly? It looks like a suit for an R-rated hero!Besides, aren't you going for PG13 at most?"
Yaoyoruzu nodded her head slowly in agreement, before clasping her hands together and thanking the purple-hair girl for her opinion.
"So! What did you need?"
Jirou opened her mouth to reply, but then the bell for class rang, and she quickly dived to her seat.
"Later." She mouthed.
- Time skip -
"Later" was a complete understatement. Usually for the soon-to-be hero, it meant "until lunch." But this time, this time, it meant "give me an entire week because people SERIOUSLY cannot get their shit done!"
For the entire week, Jirou was tasked with fixing her entire band! Even the words, "fixing up" was an understatement! She had to buy new supplies, get new wires, re-order speakers, re-edit the soundtracks, and find out why her online merchandise store was glitching.
But, by the end of the week, it was all finally fixed!
Jirou collapsed onto the dorm room's couch in pure exhaustion. Her body was sinking into the couch, sending her into bliss. Even her eyelids were on the brink of shutting! Dream land was just an arm length away. But unfortunately, her mind was bursting with ideas, each running frantically into different directions.
With a sigh, Jirou sat up and searched through her backpack.
"Ah hah! There you are!" With a delighted smile, the purple-head slammed down the notebook onto the coffee table and turned to an unfinished song.
"Hm? What did you find, Jirou?"
In an instance, the girl shrieked and threw the notebook across the room. She then turned around and strained a grin at the person behind her.
It was Kaminari.
"Oh... Hey Kaminari! What's up?" Jiroy twirled the dangling part of her ear and fluttered her eyelashes. Hopefully the dunce part of his brain will kick in...
With a raised eyebrow, Kaminari walked over to the thrown notebook and picked it up. "So... am I not supposed to ask why you just freaked out? Or should I stay silent?"
As he was about the hand back the notebook, Kaminari conveniently looked down and noticed the unfinished song. "Hm? What's thi- hey!"
Jirou had hastily grabbed her notebook from the yellow-head and turned away, a blush forming on her cheeks. Please tell me he didn't read it...
"It's nothing! Just a list of agencies I was looking into..."
"You know," Kaminari said slowly. He then placed a hand on the Jirou's shoulder. "Fat-Gum was looking to find another student... preferably a female." He chuckled.
Jirou blinked. "Wha-"
"Anyways, it would be nice to be partners with you again... but this time in crime!"
Partners in crime. The words stayed glued to her conscious as Jirou quickly walked away. It was a good title.
"Yeah... sure... I uh... have things to do! Don't be late to practice and I'll see you tomorrow! Good night!"
"Okay! Good night, Jirou! Think about it, would yeah?"
Jirou walked away without a reply and the open she reached her room, she had slammed shut the door behind her and grabbed the nearest guitar.
Playing a couple cords, her heart returned back to it's original beat and Jirou leaned her head back, deep in thought. The song was close to finish-- all it needed was a title and an ending verse.
But, it wasn't the fact that one of her band members saw an original-- because that was a petty thing to get angry over. It was because the person who she wanted to dedicate everything to, saw it. The one person who made her panick with a red face and a heart that beat 1 million beats a minute, read it. That was almost as bad as fighting All Might face to face!
Hopefully things will get better. Jirou thought.
Hopefully.
- Time Skip -
That fucking, son of a bitch, mother fucking of a Pikachu, deserves death. No, no, no. The dunce didn't deserve death, he deserved a thousand years of hunger and agonizing pain!
Jirou stomped into her room and slammed the door shut. She grabbed the nearest guitar and strung a note with so much furry, the sound vibrated for minutes. After a while, the note died down and so did the purple-head's anger.
She was infuriated at none other, than Kaminari. Who, conveniently was being a huge piece of shit these last few weeks.
For example, three weeks ago Jirou declared for the band to practice one last time before heading back to the dorm room. Usually, this meant to go all out and don't. Hold. Back.
Who would have thought that Kamin fucking Nari decided to actually go all out??
"Okay, guys! One last practice and then we can all head back home!" Jirou had declared proudly. For her, these practices meant a time to rejuvenate and connect to music, passionately. "One, two three-"
All of a sudden, the speakers had blasted music that made everyone fall to the floor, clutching their ears in pain.
It was the sound of a guitar.
"WHAT THE FUCK, KAMINARI?!"
"YOU WANNA FUCK???" Kaminari gave a playful-wide grin at Jirou and continued with his charade.
She became bright-burning red with embarrassment. As she scrambled up the turn off the speaker, Jirou had listed 100 different ways the kill Kaminari. Scratch that, 1 million!
The purple-head had successfully turned off the speaker and turned towards the blonde, "OUT!"
Thinking back to this time, Jirou regretted the way she acted. After all, it wasn't Kaminari or Jirou's fault for their actions.
They-- including all of the 3rd years, were all incredibly stressed out with studying for their finals and college entrance exams. That including rigorous training and last minute plans for the future.
Jirou pulled out a song labeled, "Hopefully Partners." She had finished it a couple weeks back, but never had the time to play it. It was, after all, a song she dedicated for Kaminari.
He had been the one to encourage Jirou to make the band, created the name, and made her life rotate around his words. He was the only one who had done anything for her, out of pure kindness.
Picking up her guitar, she strung a chord.
"Electric waves are dancing. Oh yeah. Dancing around you, babe." She took a deep breath, "The thumping beat of thunder, is creating a symphony that makes me think, will this all fade?"
Jirou stopped after. This is super cheesy... With a shake of her head and a smile, she picked up her phone and diled Yaoyoruzu's number. If she was going to sing this song, then she better get practicing.
- Time Skip -
"Jirou... what are you wearing?!"
The girl in question turned around, confused. "What do you mean?"
Yaoyoruzu sighed and exclaimed, "This is a monstrosity! How are you supposed to go onstage with this... this horror?!" She waved arms up and down, pointing out all the flaws of the dress.
This was their very last performance. After tonight, the band was just another prominent figure in history. They had all played several songs before this, but performance was special.
Jirou had called the manager to schedule a secret show, dedicated to Kaminari-- who was going to be in the crowd, oblivious and certainly living up to his nickname.
"Momo, it doesn't look that bad,"
Rolling her eyes, Yaoyoruzu grabbed the purple-head by the ear and shoved her to the nearest changing room. "This is why I bring extra clothes! You're going to look absolutely fabulous tonight!"
Groaning, Jirou shook her head and slipped into the outfit. She was then pulled into a chair while Yaoyoruzu did her makeup. All when having to hear the black-hair girl exclaim how much of a disappointment Jirou was.
"And done! What do you think?"
She stood up and walked over to the nearest full-body mirror. The dress came down, mid-way to her thigh, and it was similar what she wore to I-Expo. Except, it had black-dark clouds on her chest, then a sunset color bow on her stomach, and then purple and yellow lighting strikes going all the way down.
She was in awe.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, we actually have one last performance from your beloved band! As an apology for this long and late night, drinks and appetizers will be free!"
Jirou snapped out and quickly gave Yaoyoruzu a hug, whispering a thank you into her ear.
"Please don't thank me," Yaoyoruzu giggled, "Thank your terrible fashion skills. Now come on, we have a show to preform!"
Jirou shook her head in laughter and together, they went on stage.
The bright lights hit her in the eyes, blinding her from the crowd. She walked over to the microphone, guitar in hand.
"Uh..." she turned around and faced her friends with a smile. "I would first like to thank my amazing band members for pushing through these last three years, my classmates for attending every show, and all of you for encouraging us every night."
She blinked.
"But I would like to thank everything to Kaminari Denki. This song is for you!"
With that, she strung her guitar and the lyrics poured out of her like water. Every note-- every word fit in like pieces of a puzzle. The music flew through the crowd, entrancing them in a slumber that made them lean in for more.
The song was three minutes long, but for Jirou, it was as long as ten seconds. As the last note played, she bowed. There was so much more that she wanted to say. There was so much more songs that she wanted to make and preform.
A bitterness filled her heart as she walked off stage, but then a thought occured to her. Jirou ran back, bumping into the backstage members and hastily grabbed the microphone.
"I LOVE YOU, YOU STUPID PIKACHU!"
Jirou was pulled off stage by embarrassed backstage members and she was carried over to Yaoyoruzu, who gave them a sympathetic smile.
"That was... really amazing of you, Jirou."
Jirou froze in her tracks. Her blood rushed to her head, her muscles screamed at her to run, but her feet stayed rooted to her spot.
"S-shut up... Kaminari."
Yaoyoruzu, who felt extremely awkward gave Jirou a pat and gave hand signals to everyone to leave them.
"Ugh. Just get a room, jeez." A girl-- around Jirou's age muttered while passing by them. The words only made her burn like lava.
"Wh-what do you want?"
Kaminari hummed, amused by the girl's mortification. "I was thinking.. how about going to the park?"
"What?" Jirou whispered.
"I kind of... planned something tonight, as well." Kaminsri stated, also embarrassed. He then held out his hand. "Wanna go?"
Jirou reached out, but then retreated a bit in hesitation. Was she really willing to go out with the biggest idiot in Japan?
"F-fine."
Unfortunately, Jirou was looking at the ground as Kamianri led them to the park, because she didn't notice the adorable grin that spread across his cheeks.
The lamps lit the path and as they neared their destinations Jirou couldn't help but let out a suprise gasp. Kaminari-- with help by all their friends, had decked out the park like a full on love paradise.
There were fairy lights and lanterns that hung from tree to tree, heart shaped balloons that twirled in the wind, and even sprinkled rose petals on the gravel path.
If this was extravagant, then Jirou didn't know what else to call the next biggest suprise of the night. Because at the center, there stood an ice gazebo with the most romantic dinner laid out.
"You're going to attract flies, Jirou." Kaminari chuckled.
Jirou immediately shut her mouth and playfully smacked him. "S-shut up."
As they both sat down to eat, the atmosphere changed. Their normal, playful chatter that consisted of pure stupidity filled the night's air, and if you recorded their conversation, it would sound like a quarrel between a squirrel and a chipmunk.
"So," Electric boy placed his utensils down and scratched the back of his head. "I've been meaning to tell you something for a long time..."
Jirou looked up and as if a boulder was in her throat, she swallowed. "Yeah?"
"Jirou... no, scratch that. Kyouka-- wait, can I call you Kyouka??"
"Sure...?" This wasn't the first time Pikachu boy had said her name. But, the tingling senses in her heart definitely hadn't happen the last time.
Kaminari coughed. "Will you be my girlfriend?"
His gaze penetrated hers. There was no laughter, no sense of playfulness that usually surrounded Kaminari. Hi eyes that was usually bright and cheerful, was filled with a serious glint that was as hard as steel. The pounding in the poor girl's heart had increased three times it's usual beat, but she couldn't care less.
"HAH! Stop joking around Pikachu! You seriously need-"
"I'm serious."
The cherry blossoms that surrounded them, swayed to the wind, creating a beautiful scene that surrounded Jirou's vision. As if it were possible, the dunce head in front of her looked truly handsome.
She smiled. "Fine. But then I get to call you Pikabae."
Kaminari burst out of his seat and with a quick swoop, picked up the magnificent girl in front of him. "You can call me whatever you want. As long as your mine!"
They both laughed, eyes twinkling beneath the starry night. Kaminari slowly set her down, but his arms never left her waist. They were centimeters apart, and if Jirou wanted to, she could close the gap.
And she did.
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comicgeekscomicgeek · 5 years
Text
Tales of Their Hero Academia: Wake Up, Shitty Hair
In the background of my on-going, next-gen, My Hero Academia fic, Their Hero Academia, I’ve made mention of a battle with an upstart League of Villains and Kirishima suffering terrible injuries.  The story of the affect this had on his husband, Bakugo, is not an easy one...
Day Two
Katsuki’s world is broken.   He’s sitting in an uncomfortable hospital chair, hasn’t moved for hours, though he wouldn’t have been able to tell you how long he’s been there.  He knows, logically, that he must have gotten up at some point to answer nature’s call. And he’s vaguely aware that people have offered him food, though he wouldn’t be able to tell you whether or not he’s eaten it.  Even the faint beeping of various machines has become part of the background, where once he found them harsh, sharp and distracting.
Katsumi is…  She’s with Deku and Round Face.  That’s right.  He made the mistake of bringing her here when they got the call.  She shouldn’t have…  she shouldn’t have seen what she saw, she shouldn’t have had to see him like that… seen either of them like that…  She’d clutched onto him so tightly and he’d fought so hard to stay strong in front of her…
Eijiro lays in the hospital bed before him, hooked to more machines and wires than he can count. He’s wrapped in enough bandages to look like a mummy.  And he is broken.  So very broken.  If he’d had any other Quirk, he would have already been dead.  They’d had to use special medical tools to stabilize him, locked in his Hardened state.  
Eijiro and several other Heroes had gone up against a group of upstarts calling themselves the League of Villains. And a Villain called Strongarm had beaten him worse than anyone ever had before.
He hadn’t been there. He’d been on the other side of the country, working on a different case.  He wasn’t there when the love of his life needed him.  Maybe if he’d been there he could have done something… could have fragged that sucker before he could hurt Eijiro.  Could have prevented all of… this.
He knows he should count himself lucky that Eijiro survived.  Not all the Heroes who had gone out had come back.  Sato’s wife, Chizu, was one of the ones who hadn’t made it. He couldn’t imagine what his former classmate was going through, couldn’t imagine what their young son was going through.  How would he go on if… How would he explain it to Katsumi if…
No.
NO.
He refused to think of that. Eijiro was the strongest person he knew. Stronger than him, that was for sure. Challenges like a relationship, marriage, fatherhood, things that scared the hell out of him, Eijiro had charged into headlong, with a sharp-toothed smile on his face.
They’d gotten Aizawa in from U.A. to erase his Quirk, letting Eijiro revert back to soft flesh. Then, they said, treatment could begin in earnest.  But they still didn’t fully know the extent of the damage.  Didn’t know… if he’d ever wake.
Katsuki gives his hand a squeeze.  The doctors had said he might still be able to feel something.  
“C’mon, Shitty Hair,” he says, his voice hoarse from disuse.  “Wake up.”
***
Day Five
“You!” Katsuki strikes out, pinning Eijiro’s visitor to the wall.  “You’ve got a lot of nerve showing your face here!”
Tetsutetsu doesn’t fight back, doesn’t unleash his Quirk.  His grip on Katsuki’s hand is just enough to keep him from crushing his windpipe.  Katsuki vaguely remembers that he’d been hurt too, his arm broken so badly they’d had to get someone with a heat Quirk to soften his metal form so that they could set it.  That arm is still in a cast.  
“Bakugo…” Tetsutetsu grunts… “Can’t… breathe…”
“Why shouldn’t I?” Katsuki growls.  Sparks and miniature explosions dance over his other hand, which he dangles dangerously close to Tetsutetsu’s face.  “It’s your fault!”
Tetsutetsu’s eyes go wide. “What…?” he gasps.
“You’re his partner! You’re supposed to have his back! You’re supposed to watch out for him!” He’s getting louder with each statement, his anger building and bubbling up inside him.  For a moment, he’s the Bakugo of his U.A. days, a barely repressed cauldron of rage simmering over and splashing over everything.
“But you couldn’t do it! You let him fight that monster alone! If he dies… it’s your fault!”
Tetsutetsu shifts to metal now, strong enough to shove Katsuki back, even with one hand.  “What the hell is wrong with you?!  I came to check on my best bro!  He’s almost all I’ve thought about!”
“Both of you, stop it!” A sharp blow cracks against the back Katsuki’s neck, knocking him to his knees.  He’s up in an instant, facing Tetsutetsu’s wife, Itsuka.  
“You looking for a fight?” Katsuki growls.  “I could use the release!”
There’s security at the door, but she waves them off.  He nods, holding up his hands.  He’s not going to fight… not here.
“Bakugo…” Tetsutetsu says, softly.  He turns back to flesh, looking down at his busted arm.  “Strongarm broke my arm.  He was going to finish me.  Eijiro shoved me out of the way, took the hit… and kept taking them…  Gave everybody time to get out of there…   He’s a Hero, man.  Through and through.”
That’s what everyone was saying.  That Eijiro had stood like an unbreakable wall to give the others time.  Time to fight, time to escape, time to get the wounded to safety.  
Damn, Shitty Hair. Always thinking of someone else. Never putting himself first. Never thinking about the risks when he threw himself into danger.  Just like he’d done for him a thousand times over during the time they’d known each other. A better and more faithful friend and partner than he deserved.
“He’s strong,” Tetsutetsu said.  “He’ll wake up.  I know it.”
***
Day Seven
He leaves when visiting hours are over, picks up Katsumi from whichever of his friends is taking care of her that day, goes home, puts her to bed, and sleeps fitfully.  And the next day, he gets up, gets Katsumi ready for school, drops her off, arranges pick up, and goes to the hospital and waits.   It’s the same, day in and day out. His agency calls, but he sends them to voicemail or shoots off a rare text to tell someone else to take care of it.
His world is here.  He has to be here, every moment he can. Because Eijiro is going to wake up. And he wants to be the first thing he sees.
“Hey,” a voice says at the door.  It’s Pikachu. He looks better than he has.  He was hurt in the battle too, but not as badly as Eijiro.  No, he’s being discharged today.  He gets to go home to his wife and kids, a daughter Katsumi’s age and a three year old son.
Pikachu looks over Eijiro and his eyes go dark.  He lets out a puff of breath.  “Man… that could’ve been me.”  Katsuki notices his breathing is still heavy, his movements cautiously like he’s trying to avoid popping stitches.  He’s been injured himself often enough to know the signs.
“Yeah,” Katsuki growls, “well, it wasn’t.”
Pikachu puts a hand on his shoulder.  “Look, I’m getting out of here today.  I’m supposed to be taking it easy, but if there’s anything you need or Katsumi needs…”
He knocks Pikachu’s hand off his shoulder and Pikachu lets it drop limply to his side.  “What we need is a husband and a father who’s not in a fucking coma!”
“Hey!” Pikachu snaps, backing up and holding his hands up.  “I’m on your side here, man!  I was there when he went down!  I was there when Chizu…  and I just… I just lay there… bleeding out, brains too fried to even know how hurt I was…”
He sank into a chair, head down.   “I couldn’t save him, man.  One of my best friends and I just lay there jibbering while he got the shit beat out him.” He looked up, his eyes wet with tears. “I’m sorry… I’m just… so… sorry…”
Dammit, he’s barely good with his emotions on a good day.  Eijiro and Katsumi are good at bringing the best out of him for that. With Eijiro hurt and her away, he’s falling back on old habits, old anger, old walls.  He’s had a lot of a therapy since U.A, tried to put himself in a better place, a better mindset.   Right now, without his touchstones, it’s hard.  He should say something reassuring here, tell Pikachu… something, anything.
“Pika… Kaminari,” he says, finally.  “It wasn’t your fault.”
Stupid, stupid Pikachu. Always with that dumb smile.  It didn’t look right, seeing him sob like some kind of baby.  At least he was stopping now.
“You’ve got a wife and kids to go home to,” Katsuki said.  “What you can do for me is go home to them.  Maybe by the time you get back, Shitty Hair will wake up.”
***
Day Ten
There hasn’t been any improvement.  Things haven’t gotten any worse, but Eijiro still hasn’t shown any signs of waking up. And Katsuki’s been spending as much time as he can at the hospital still.  He’s barely even seen their daughter.  He’s eating poorly, not sleeping the hours he’s used to, not sleeping the schedule he’s used to.  All that discipline, all that treating his body like a temple, out the window.
“Always said you were gonna make me soft,” he says to Eijiro.  “But I’d be a couch potato in a heartbeat if I had you taking care of me again. But you gotta wake up for that.”
“Dammit, Katsuki,” a voice from the doorway says.  “You look like shit.”
There were only a handful of people who talked to him like that.  One of them was his mother.  And he’d have fought back with equal venom if it had been her.  But it wasn’t.  Instead, it was Shizuka Yamamoto, a small, but formidable and foul-mouthed dark haired woman.  She was the Office Manager for Eijiro and Tetsutetsu’s Agency.  She’d also been their surrogate.  They owed her a great deal.
“Yeah, well,” he growls, “you should see the other guy.”  She’s not wrong though.  He looks like shit.  He feels like shit.  Mentally and physically, he’s just about out of everything he has to give.
Shizuka takes a seat on the other side of the bed, giving Eijiro a long look over.  “How’s Katsumi?” she asks.  Despite having declared herself multiple times as “totally unfit for motherhood,” she still cared deeply for the girl she’d carried and given birth to.  She and Katsumi had a good relationship.
“She asked me today if we were going to have to have a funeral for her Papa like they did for Kenta’s mom.”  
“Oh.  Oh…  Well… fuck.”
“Yeah, that’s what I said. Or thought.  Trying not to swear around her.  She soaks it all up like a sponge.”
“What’d you say?”
“Told her I didn’t… told her I didn’t know.  That I hoped we wouldn’t.  That the doctors were doing everything they could for him.” And then she’d started crying and he’d just done his best to hold her as long and as tight as he could.  She’d never seemed so small and so vulnerable as she had in that moment.
“What do I do if he doesn’t wake up?” he asks, finally.
“You hurt, you heal, you move on,” Shizuka says.  “Same as everybody else.  I give you shit, Katsuki, but you’re strong.  Whether you believe it or not.”
“I’m not,” he says. “I act tough… and I am tough.  But I’m not like Eijiro.  If it was me in this bed instead of him…”
“He’d be a sobbing mess,” Shizuka replies.
“Yeah, but he’d be a functional sobbing mess.  He’d know what to say.  He’s good with all that emotion stuff.  I’m not good at anything I can’t punch my way out of.  All I can do is throw a damn pity party and shuffle around like a zombie.”
He doesn’t see the slap coming.  Shizuka’s Quirk lets her move with incredible speed for three second bursts.  Not enough to have made her a Hero, but useful. And apparently useful for slapping him.   “What the hell, Shizuka?!”
“I get that you’re hurting, Katsuki,” she growls.  “But you’re falling apart here.  Literally and figuratively.”  She jabs him in the chest with a finger.  “You’ve got a daughter to take care of.  You’ve got people who depend on you, count on you.  You’ve got friends, sidekicks, employees, family.  And right now, you’re killing yourself out of some kind of misdirected guilt.”
“You don’t know shit,” he snaps back, rising out of his chair.
“I know plenty,” she says. “I’ve lost people too, remember?  Akina ring any bells?”
“Aw… dammit,” Katsuki growls.  Shizuka’s girlfriend, who’d gotten killed in a villain attack a couple of years before she’d agreed to be their surrogate.  It had been quick, not long and lingering like this…  “I shouldn’t have…”
“That’s right,” she says. “You shouldn’t have.  But you did.  But I forgive you.  But you’ve got to take better care of yourself.  When he wakes up, he’s not going to be able to take care of you and get better.”
That almost gets him to smile.  “Touché.”
“And that goes for you too, Eijiro,” she tells his prone form.  “I didn’t spend nine months pregnant to give you a daughter just for you to sleep time with her away.  You damn well better wake up.”
***
Day Fourteen
Two weeks.  It’s been two damn weeks and there’s been no change in Eijiro.  But he’s taken some of what Shizuka said to heart.  It cuts him like a knife to be away from Eijiro when he thinks he might wake up at any moment, but she was right, he was destroying himself, he was stoking Katsumi’s fears without even meaning to.  So he’s spent less time here the last three days, spending time with their daughter, losing himself in a workout.
He feels a little less like shit.  Katsumi’s sleeping a little more soundly and so is he.  He even stopped by his Agency this morning to issue a few directions, put his head sidekick in charge until he returns.
He’s going to drop in the rankings for this.  He knows that.  It’s still his dream to be Number One… and that’ll still be his dream when he gets back to it.  He’d retire today if it meant Eijiro woke up.
Pretty much all their friends had been by at some point.  Soy Sauce Face and Raccoon Eyes, Glasses and Crazy Chick, Deku and Round Face, Icy Hot and Ponytail, and more. “Their friends.”  He wonders if that’s really the right word for it.  He’d call most of them Eijiro’s friends and say he just puts up with them.  Maybe he’s wrong about that.  Maybe not. They’ve stepped up for him in all kinds of ways since Eijiro got hurt.  He doesn’t know for sure if he’d do the same for them and it bothers him.
Eijiro’s moms checked in with him frequently.  They’d flown in on the third day and stayed a couple more.  He’d been lucky they hadn’t been there to see him scuffling with Tetsutetsu.  But he’d told them he’d let them know if there were any changes.  Their lives couldn’t be put on hold as easily as his.
He wishes he had something better to tell them.
He’s brought Katsumi with him today.  Even with no sign of waking up, Eijiro looks a little less like a mummy as some of his worse injuries have started to heal.  She’s sitting in a chair near the head of the bed, reading to him from her favorite storybook.  He’s told her that her Papa can hear her, even if he can’t show it, and she’s determined to try and make him happy.  His stomach growls and he realizes it’s nearly noon.  
“You look like you could use something other than hospital food,” a voice says.  He looks up and it’s Sato, holding a couple of Bento boxes. “Izuku said you’d be here.  I, ah, brought you some lunch.”
Katsuki is surprised, both by the visit and the gesture.  He and Sato aren’t friends.  They’re barely acquaintances if he’s honest.  But Sato and Eijiro are.  And he supposes that means something.  Either way… it’s appreciated.
Sato looks like five miles of bad road, bags under his eyes and a pain in those eyes that Katsuki sees every time he looks in the mirror lately.  But he looks… functional.  In a way Katsuki knows he isn’t right now.  They’re both the walking wounded but Sato isn’t caught between life and death the way he is.  That door’s closed.  Closed painfully, perhaps, but it gives him direction Katsuki just doesn’t have right now.
“Hi Mister Sato,” Katsumi says, looking up from her book.  “I’m sorry about Mrs. Sato.”
A painful smile crosses Sato’s face.  “Thank you,” he says, softly.  
Katsuki gets up, rubbing the back of his head awkwardly, before taking the boxes.  “I’m sorry too,” he says.  “I…   Eijiro had nothing but good things to say about Chizu.  She seemed like a good woman.”
Why isn’t he better with words?  Why does he care so much about that now?  He never did before.  Marriage… parenthood… loss…  It’s like he’s been seeing things through new eyes of late.   What had Pikachu said, all those years ago?  That he had the personality of a steaming turd?  All that and everyone still stepped up for him and his family.
“Thank you,” Sato says again.  “I was sorry to hear about Eijiro.  Sorry I haven’t visited before now, but…”
“I get it,” Katsuki replies. “I do.”
He looks over at his daughter.  “Katsumi, can you keep an eye on Papa for me for a minute?  I need to talk to Mister Sato out in the hall.”
She looks up from her book. She looks so much like him (and the Hag, if he’s forced to admit it) it’s almost painful.  They flipped a coin on whose sperm they’d used.  Right now, if the worst should happen, he’s wishing he’d lost that toss.  “Sure thing, Daddy!”
Out in the hall, Sato regards him curiously.  “What’s up, Bakugo?”
He shuts the door to the room most of the way.  Just enough of a crack left that he can see or hear Katsumi if he needs to.  “How?” he asks.
“How… what?”
“Do I have to spell it out to you?” he growls.  “How are you still functional?  We might lose Eijiro and I’m barely holding it together. It took Shizuka slapping some sense into me to even get to this.  And you’re… here.  Looking out for somebody else.  Somebody who, frankly, didn’t even know your name until halfway through third year.”
Sato leans against the wall, letting out a breath through his thick lips.  He runs a hand through his hair.  “I look that together?” he asks.   “Because I sure as hell don’t feel it.  Guess I’m getting good at faking it.”
“Faking it?”
“I don’t have a choice, Bakugo,” Sato says.  “I’ve got Kenta.  He needs a functional parent.  He already lost his mom…  he doesn’t need to lose me too.  Even if… everywhere ad everything reminds me of Chizu.  Reminds me that she’s not there anymore.  
“I go to bed alone.  I keep waking up, expecting to find her next to me.  I still make too much food.  I was buying groceries yesterday and I nearly picked up those pickles she liked so much that me and Kenta can’t stand.  I spend most of my time wanting to cry.  But I can’t. I can’t fall apart like that.  I can’t do that to our son.”
“Sounds like what everyone else is telling me,” Katsuki admits.
“It’s good advice,” Sato says.  “But you’ve got friends, Bakugo.  We’re all here for you, whatever you need.  We went through hell for each other back in school, and we’ll still do it now.”
He looks Katsuki in the eyes.  “Whatever happens… whatever you need, you don’t have to go through this alone.  I’m here.  We can go through this together.”
“Sato…” he tries, failing to find his voice for a moment.  “Sato… thanks.”
Opening up to someone he barely knew?  He was getting soft.  Shitty Hair really needed to wake up.
***
Day Thirty
“Mister Bakugo?” the doctor asks.
“Kirishima-Bakugo,” he corrects, automatically.  Way back when the two of them had been married, he’d been insistent on that. Eijiro was one of the most important parts of his life.  And he wanted to make sure everyone knew it.  He wasn’t good with words, but he could show it.
“Mister Kirishima-Bakugo,” the doctor amends.  “Can we speak frankly?”
He looks over at Katsumi, reading to Eijiro again.  She’s not paying them any attention.
“It’s been nearly a month since your husband was injured,” the doctor says.  “He’s still reliant on the machines to breathe for him.  There’s been no sign of higher brain activity since. The odds of him recovering are extremely slim.  At this point, you should really consider…”
He’s screaming, screaming so loud and hard that his throat is raw.  His hands are on the doctor’s throat, watching his eyes bulge.  He wants to kill him, to watch the light fade from his eyes…
It’s not until he hears his daughter scream that he realizes what he’s doing.
He lets go and the man slumps to the floor, sucking in breaths in ragged gasps.
“We’re not pulling the plug,” he growls.  “How dare you say that?  How dare you say that in front of our daughter?!”
“You’re… you’re as crazy as they say!”
He doesn’t hear anything else the man says.  Instead, he’s focused on his daughter, who’s crying, looking at him with terrified, wide eyes.
He bends down next to her and he reached out, but she shrinks away and that hurts more than anything, more than any injury any villain has every inflicted upon him.
“Katsumi…” he says, softly. “I’m sorry…  I’m so sorry.  Daddy just got so mad and so scared for a moment, he didn’t know what he was doing, what he was thinking…”
His eyes are stinging and wet and he realizes he’s crying, crying like he hadn’t cried since he was a child.  
“It’s okay, Daddy… I just got scared too…”
And he’s holding her close and tight and he might not ever let go.
Especially if Eijiro never wakes up.
***
Day Thirty-Seven
“I need you, Shitty Hair,” Katsuki says to the prone form of his husband, holding his hand in his. “I’m not strong enough to do this without you.”
He gives Eijiro’s hand a squeeze.  “You are, without a doubt, the best thing to ever happen to me.  You make me a better person.  I’m not…  I’m not complete without you.”
He’s seen what his world looks like without Eijiro in it and he doesn’t like it, doesn’t like it at all.
He gives Eijiro’s hand another squeeze.  “I mean it, Eijiro.  You know my secret?  Every time I’m gonna do some damn fool thing, every time I’m gonna say something nasty or do something pretty fucking violent, I think about what you’d say. And yeah, most of the time, I win that argument and do whatever the hell I want.  But sometimes “you” do too.  And those’re the times when I’m a better person.”
Something splatters against his legs and he realizes he’s crying.  The last time he’d cried was when Katsumi was born.  If anyone had seen him now…
“I’ve asked a lot of you since we’ve known each other.  But I’m gonna ask you for one more thing: don’t leave me.  Just… don’t leave me.  Please. Wake up, Shitty Hair.”
Katsuki is the big, bad Hero, Ground Zero.  He doesn’t get scared.  He doesn’t plead.  And he definitely doesn’t cry.  He doesn’t back down from anything, he doesn’t worry about anything.  His biggest concern is supposed to be his next fight.
But he’s a father. And a husband.  And it’s looking more and more like he’s going to be a widower. And that terrifies him more than anything in the world.  Well, almost anything.  If he has to tell Katsumi that her Papa isn’t coming home, he will break.  He will break into a million pieces and never be able to be put back together again.
This isn’t something he can blow up, it isn’t something he can punch, it isn’t something he can fight. There is absolutely nothing he can do. For the first time in years, he is utterly, and completely helpless.
He squeezes Eijiro’s hand again.  “Wake up, Shitty Hair.  Please.”
And then there’s… No. Was it…   Eijiro’s hand was moving, fingertips slowly twitching, giving his hand a weak squeeze in return.
Eijiro’s eyes opened.
“NURSE!  DOCTOR! SOMEBODY!  SOMEBODY GET YOUR DAMN ASS IN HERE!”
***
Day Thirty-Eight
Eijiro’s awake.   Weak, but awake.  He’s sitting up, free of the breathing tube, but still plugged into a whole bunch of wires that are keeping track of his vital signs. But those vitals are growing steadier by the day.
Katsumi is sitting on his lap, telling Eijiro about everything she’s done in the last month, happily going down various tangents until her original point is lost.  She talks about Toshi Midoriya and Izumi Todoroki and all her friends, about how much she missed him, about how hard she wished for him to come back.   Eijiro takes it all in with a weak smile, doing his best to pay attention and stay awake. It’s only when Katsumi quiets for a moment that he speaks up.
“You know… Bakubabe,” he says, his voice weak and raspy from disuse, “when I was… waking up…  pretty sure…  I heard you… saying some… stuff.”
“You didn’t here sh… nothing,” Katsuki says, his cheeks flushed with embarrassment.  He’d spoken them to Eijiro, but he’d never meant for him to actually hear them…!
“It was…  pretty manly… admitting all… that,” Eijiro says.  “Manliest… thing… I ever… heard.”
The road to recovery for Eijiro is going to be a long one.  He was in a coma for over a month.  They don’t know yet if he’ll ever be able to go back to being a Hero again.  They’re not sure about anything he’ll be able to do again.
But that’s a worry for another day.   Because Eijiro’s got him watching his back, got their daughter there with him.  They all get all the tomorrows they want.
Because Shitty Hair woke up.
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0poole · 5 years
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An idea for a Poke-clone
So since Pokemon day just passed, I started to think about a kind of Poke-clone type of game/series of my own, since that seems to be an upcoming trend. I already thought up the base idea for my own Pokemon region before, and I’m not sure if I’ll eventually combine that idea with this one, but anyways…
The very broad idea is that it’s sort of the best of Pokemon, mixed with the best of Digimon, and I guess for fun’s sake we could say it’s sort of got a Bionicle flair to it a bit too. 
I feel like there are some conceptual pitfalls in Pokemon that they’ve sort of tried to step across over time, that obviously aren’t too big a deal but I can probably fix with this idea. The big one that hurts them in the real world is that, by the Pokemon being presented like animals or pets, it makes battles feel like some kind of unethical dog fighting at first glance. Obviously they make it seem like Pokemon have personalities and minds like humans, in that they do genuinely want to battle, and that they genuinely like and want to fight with their trainers, which is fair, but it also begs into question other things, like why they’d want to sit on the floor and eat brown pellets out of bowls instead of on plates with actual food like the humans. Also, it makes you wonder why they even want humans to tell them what to do. In the wild, they can clearly fight on their own, so why do they instantly do what humans say when they’re caught? I guess the assumption is that humans are better with strategy, but even better than Pokemon like Alakazam or Metagross, who are supposed to have superior intelligence? Also, when a Pokemon is given to another trainer, like in the opening of the Deoxys movie, why does it not do anything and wait for its new trainer to tell it what to do, even when it’s being bombarded with attacks, and with its trainer clearly frozen in shock? 
Also, back to the idea of catching, what makes the Pokemon want to obey the trainer? At first it almost seems like Pokeballs brainwash the Pokemon into liking whoever catches it, but what about Pokemon like Ash’s Charizard, who don't obey trainers? In the games it’s related to badges, but then why would any Pokemon obey a trainer without any badges? Do they just accept that it’s their lot in life to be caught by a human, and when that happens, you just obey them if you’re not good enough yourself? Obviously a decent amount of Pokemon just become friends with a human, and then they catch them just out of a formality. But, what about Go in the most recent season of the anime? He just catches anything he sees instantly, without much of a fight at all, and he has no badges, so how can he just instantly use anything he catches? Surely not every single Pokemon they come across just wants to bow down to him instantly. Obviously a lot of this lore stuff is just in the background, since the primary purpose is gameplay and whatnot, like Go just sort of representing the catching style of Pokemon Go, and with badges being a logical progression that keeps you from just using the strongest Pokemon traded from a friend and wiping the game clean. Still, even if you just accept it, it’d be nice to just not have to accept it, you know?
Then in terms of design, I kind of like the prospects of Digimon a bit more. Visually, though, I think Digimon are universally worse looking than Pokemon, but the fact that they seem more like friends than pets solves so many problems. First, that they’re made out to be actual sentient (sapient if you want to be pedantic about it) beings, instead of animals. This makes it so much easier to understand why they’d want to fight and protect their less-than-capable humans, and why they’d be willing to fight at all. They’d just understand it’s basically a sparring match or a sport. Also, it makes the humanoid designs so much easier to think about. When you see that classic image of Mimey sitting on the floor picking at the “Pokemon food” from a dog bowl alongside the rest of the Pokemon, it just doesn’t feel right. 
Also, what the hell are humans in this world? Why are Pokemon regarded as such special beings in the world? They always say “Welcome to the world of Pokemon” like they know of a different world full of non-Pokemon, and that Pokemon aren’t just animals. It almost made more sense in the first few seasons of the anime, where you’d just see some random fish swim alongside Magikarp or whatever. That made it clear that there are normal animals as well, showing that Pokemon are separate things entirely. But, now, they’ve retconned that, and I don’t think that was how the games worked in the first place at all. Then, the age-old question that all the Youtube game theorists try to answer: Are humans Pokemon? They sure seem resilient to Pokemon attacks, but don’t have any themselves, apart from like Tackle or whatever. It feels like animals were a thing way back when, but through natural selection the animals that developed supernatural power obviously became the dominant species, and over time the supernatural animals were called “Pokemon,” and humans with their technology/taming abilities managed to survive the onslaught of dangerous creatures by using them as protection from others. Then, I guess way down the line humans can’t keep up and die out, creating the Mystery Dungeon series, since it’s strange how the Pokemon there seem to know what humans are despite them never existing in the series. That, or maybe Mewtwo just fuses people with Pokemon like he did in the Detective Pikachu movie. 
Anyway, enough of me talking about stuff probably explained in the manga or whatever. Here’s the Poke-clone idea:
The creatures were there first, and at least most of them have human-level intelligence, if not higher-level intelligence. There are some supernatural animals around, alongside supernatural people and monsters, and there are 7 primary elements they can have: Earth, Fire, Water, Electricity, Air, Light, and Dark. Earth is basically Earth in Temtem, Fire/Water/Electricity/Air are all self-explanatory, Light is basically a more generalized Fairy type, and Dark is like Dark but with also including Ghost. These creatures can be born with any of these types, and can naturally wield them, getting better at it as they grow. But, these types can be combined using elemental essences, creating new types. Earth and Fire creates Metal (because smelting), Light and Earth creates Crystal (Again think Temtem, just can’t get enough of it) Water and Dark create Ice (because ice does feel different enough to be separated from water elementally imo) Fire and Water creates Air again (“steam” doesn’t feel special enough) and Electricity and Fire creates Plasma (basically generic magic). Chances are I’ll think of more combinations but whatever. There are different areas themed after these elements, and in these areas a specific element is boosted in power, so the “gym” equivalent will reside in these places, and “badges” will prove that you can defeat an element at its strongest level. Also, the areas that connect the main areas either double up types or use the secondary type which they combine into, so not all “gyms” would be super straightforward. 
Here’s where humans come in, though. They’re not just “humans.” They’re actually a species of these creatures called “Humans” (capital) and are mythical beings which did not originally exist on the world. Originally, it was just the other creatures. At that point, humans were only a myth spread around as myths do, and they were said to be creatures with the ability to combine every primary type and use them simultaneously, being the most powerful species of creature of them all. However, when they did magically appear on Earth, they seemed awfully weak. In fact, they couldn’t wield any element naturally, but could by using elemental essence, which is just normal for creatures. Some thought they just needed to be trained and grow like the rest of them, but others just saw the myths as being dramatic. It was especially troubling to see Humans grow and die of old age without being able to use that mythical power. Regardless, many Humans were highly respected, and many teams of these creatures would look to them for guidance during battle, even though there are many teams that don’t even have a Human on them. Humans, of course, are expected to battle alongside their teammates, even if they’re not quite as capable, because that’s how their society is expected to work. 
Over time, everyone sort of let go of the idea that Humans are somehow superior and they just became equals, although the trend of Humans advising a team stuck for the most part (partially because they can’t do much else, they wanted to feel inclusive). Even with their normal social standing, though, some creatures scoffed at them claiming they’re not even worth having on a team at all. Others tried their best to draw out the mythical Human power, sometimes by capturing and experimenting on them in less-than-ethical ways. Some of them claim it’s helping them draw out their full potential, but others unabashedly say that they want to harness the Human power for their own good.
So yeah, that’s basically the lore of the idea. I’ll probably think of a specific Pokemon-Digimon-Temtem-esque name equivalent for them eventually, but for now let’s just call everything a “creature.” 
The overall design prospects of the creatures are basically at the same level as Pokemon, where some of them are clearly inspired by animals but others are just general monsters/humanoids. I’m not entirely sure if I want them to all be intelligent or if some should still be animal-like in behavior, but the latter definitely makes more sense world-wise. The areas the creatures live in are built up using the elements they wield, obviously. I could imagine the general usage of the elements being more like Avatar in a way, but obviously with more than the base four elements.
As for the elements, any individual creature would start out in only one of the primary elements, and I guess if you beat a “gym” you’d get the essence for that gym element, essentially unlocking new types for your team. You can use each essence infinitely, and outside of battle the form of the creature you use it on would permanently change if it creates a secondary type (until you use another one). However, in a battle, you can switch them on the fly, and they will revert back to however they were before the battle. I’m also thinking that they could only be used on a creature if they create a secondary type, and I’d just add more of those in so it’s less limited, and so not every creature has the exact same potential, which would make recruiting different ones just pointless (although I can see it being useful for just choosing your favorite creatures to fight with, so no loss either way). Maybe the effects could just be timed in a battle. Also, secondary typed creatures would be a different form entirely. So, if an Earth creature was given Fire essence, they’d go from looking like they’re made of stone to being made of steel, etc and etc. Think of it sort of like character customization. For the Human you’d inevitably play as, I guess you could just change their hair/eye color depending on the essence, maybe add some special particle effects or light textures on the skin.
Thematically, this is more like a tag-team sport than a battle. In a 1v1 or 2v2 scenario, you’d tag out with your teammates, since the term “tag” makes for a good reminder that everyone involved is working at the same level as you pretty much. You could also name your team as well, making it even more sport-like. Also, instead of “capturing” teammates, you’d just recruit them, logically by proving yourself in a battle. Maybe you’d have to fight them only with you as a Human so it’s much better proof that you’re a worthy leader. It also opens the possibility to just talk with NPCs and recruit them that way. Maybe you could even recruit different Humans with different body types, and therefore different stats. I guess the trouble would be how you’d keep them all by your side at all times. Maybe there could be some Telefang-esque communication device you’d use to call in the specific members of your team you’d want in your battle.
Gameplay-wise, it would definitely be cool if it were a much more live battle like Kindred Fates, where you’re controlling the active creature and using their moves on the fly. It would also make for fun multiplayer battles, where you could even have a full team go against another all at once, in a sort of battle royale. Maybe even have a true BR. Even though visually I’d love for it to be like Pokken Tournament with the circular battlefield and movement (no switching, just normal movement all the time), I definitely think having super limited and easily understandable movesets is better for having multiple teammates. 
The main story of the game is sort of set out by the lore, too. Naturally it kind of has a “chosen one” protagonist who’d inevitably bring out the mythical Human power over the course of the story, with the people trying to capture you and stuff for that power being the evil team analog. Also, for those Pokemon fans anal about having an asshole rival, they could easily be a team of only creatures that doubts Human abilities. The “gyms” being for each type is pretty standard, and having combo “gyms” definitely makes things more challenging. Maybe you could enter the “league” at the end only once you get all the essences, and the secondary type “gyms” are just for a challenge. 
I’m not sure if I want the overall age of the world to be more modern, but there would definitely be certain areas that are more ancient-looking. That’s basically why I thought the idea was a little Bionicle-like, because they have super ancient-looking areas that are themed but also have a weirdly cool degree of technology in them. It’s a seriously cool aesthetic that I want more of, but I guess certain towns and cities could keep a modern structure (roads, buildings, shops, etc) but with drastically different building designs based on the relevant element. Surely with such crazy elemental powers they wouldn’t need crazy technological transportation, but maybe that would be for the Electric elemental cities. Surely some Humans would need something to be proud of.
Obviously the biggest selling point for Pokemon (at least for me) is the monster designs, so I’ll probably put some stuff together in the future. Right now I can see there being some sort of tall Metal knight-like lady character who carries their Human around like a baby. That is, it’d be her character, and not a thing of the species. Also, I drew a cute fur seal pup recently that could easily be worked into one of these creatures. Designing monsters is too fun as is so giving me a good reason to do it is just perfect.
Of course, as is common with ideas that literally were thought up yesterday this isn’t going to be a thing unless some millionaire game designer contacts me right after posting this so yeah, I’m just spitballing right now. Spitballing is fun, though.
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weekendwarriorblog · 5 years
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The Weekend Warrior Feb. 14, 2020 – SONIC THE HEDGEHOG, FANTASY ISLAND, THE PHOTOGRAPH, DOWNHILL, OLYMPIC DREAMS
It’s Valentine’s Day on Friday and President’s Day on Monday, which means that this weekend is going to be absolutely nuts in terms of getting four new wide releases.  Last week’s Birds of Prey did not do even remotely close to where I predicted/projected – almost half!! -- and here I thought all those raves reviews might help, but apparently not. It will still make money with its global release but it’s gonna fall short even of last year’s Shazam! and many have already started questioning whether an R-rating is the way to go with a movie semi-targeted towards younger women. (Warner Bros. has already sent out a mandate to theaters to change the title of the movie to Harley Quinn: Birds of Prey. I cannot believe that it took this long for them to figure out what a terrible title they had previously!)
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With the four-day weekend, it’s very likely that Paramount Pictures’ SONIC THE HEDGEHOG, will prevail, as it brings the beloved SEGA video game character to the big screen with James Marsdenand Jim Carrey, the latter starring in one of his first big-screen appearances in a while. It should be an easy victor this weekend in a market that could desperately use another strong family film.
For those unfamiliar with SEGA’s flagship video game “mascot,” Sonic has appeared in all sorts of other media including animated series and comic books, so one can say that the character is almost but not quite as well known and popular as Nintendo’s Pokemon, which has had a much wider reach in terms of both games and cartoons.
Of course, it’s impossible not to look at Sonic the Hedgehog and completely ignore the relative success of last year’s Pokemon: Detective Pikachu, which had the added benefits of a popular A-list star in Ryan Reynoldsand a summer release. That opened with $54.4 million and made $144 million domestic and $429.7 million worldwide.
On the other hand, Sonic does have Jim Carrey, who hasn’t been in an American wide release since the 2014 sequel Dumb and Dumber To, which only made about $156 million worldwide. At one point, Carrey was one of the biggest box office stars with multiple $240 million plus domestic blockbusters. Maybe the kids won’t be as invested in Carrey’s Mr. Robotnik, but many parents who grew up with Carrey’s comedies will be happy to see him in such a perfect role.
The Presidents Day weekend allows one extra day for parents with kids needing something to do with them sans school. Even so, the biggest movies on the weekend have been superhero movies, including Black Panther, Deadpool and Fifty Shades of Grey, the latter two definitely not for kids. (Daredeviland Ghost Rider also fared well on the weekend.) In fifth place for the weekend is Warner Bros’ The LEGO Movie, which made $62.5 million over the four-day weekend, but that was in its SECOND WEEKEND! So yeah, lots of money to be had for a family movie even though the biggest opener was Christopher Columbus’ Percy Jackson and the Olympians: The Lightning Thief (now on Broadway!), which opened with $38.7 million ten years ago.
I have to imagine that Sonic is more popular, and even with the tragic misstep of that first trailer last year which got such a negative reaction to Sonic’s appearance, Paramount delayed the movie and went back to the CG drawing board, there will be enough fans interested to see how he translates to the screen that $40 million over the weekend should be doable even with three other wide releases. I also don’t think reviews will be so bad, so it should be good for $100 million plus.
Mini-Review: For whatever reason, Sonic the Hedgehog is the kind of movie that lazy critics love to dump on, maybe because it’s a kids’ movie or because it’s a movie based on a video game they played as kids, or more likely, a character their kids know from popular cartoons and comic books. It doesn’t help that judgments were mostly cast when the first trailer hit last year and Sonic looked different than what people expected. Regardless, I went into the movie with very low expectations, maybe because I really had no passionate connection to the character despite being generally familiar with some of the games.
We meet Sonic as he’s being chased by robots, and we flash back to him as a kid on a planet where he’s able to zoom around freely, until he’s discovered by predators that are hunting him (it’s never explained why), so his mentor owl gives Sonic gold rings that can take him off-planet. Sonic ends up in a small town called Green Hills where he watches the townsfolk in hiding for years, including a local police officer (James Marsden) and his wife Maddie (Tika Sumpter). The former eventually discovers Sonic after he causes a major power outage that gets the attention of the government and its genius robotics scientist, Dr. Robotnik (Jim Carrey).
Despite not having much previous connection to Sonic, it’s hard for me not to appreciate this character, because I’ve been known to zip around myself. I also enjoyed Sonic’s haste since who knows when we might see that movie based on one of my favorite comic characters, The Flash. Sonic does a good job capturing the intensity and yes, speed, of having speed powers in quite a masterful way compared to previous attempts, giving me hope that a Flash movie is possible. (Granted, they do rip-off the fun thing Quicksilver does in the recent X-movies by slowing everything around Sonic down to a halt, but it’s still amusing.)
Probably the most genius idea by Sonic’s filmmakers was to convince Jim Carrey to return to the big screen as Dr. Robotnik. He quickly reminds us how hilarious he can be when going as fully into a character as he does this one, and it’s prime Carey vs. the semi-lazy Carrey that made movies in the early ‘00s. Robotnik is a super-genius with no patience for anyone on a lower level of intellect (aka everyone), and Carrey takes that idea to the utmost extreme. (It’s hard not to compare what he’s doing in this movie to what Ewan McGregor does in Birds of Prey and see how Carey does it effortlessly whereas McGregor was clearly trying too hard.)
That’s not to take away from Marsden and Sumpter, Sonic’s other prominent human co-stars, who bring such a warmth and humanity to those characters that you rarely even think that you’re watching them interact with a fully CG-character. (Kudos to Ben Schwartz and what he brings to Sonic as his voice.)
Sure, the plot can be a bit predictable with certain parts clearly geared to kids, but there’s also slew of pop references that display some real talent in the writing of the movie so that it can be watched and enjoyed by people of all ages.
Is it possible that Sonic the Hedgehog is the first thoroughly entertaining movie of the year? Yes, indeedy. (Definitely stay through the first bunch of credits if you are a Sonic fan!)
Rating: 8/10
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One of the more interesting releases of the weekend is BLUMHOUSE’S FANTASY ISLAND (Sony Pictures Releasing), which as you can guess is a PG-13 horror version of the popular ‘80s show, starring Michael Peña as Mr. Rouke, the head of a program in which people can pay lots of money to achieve their greatest wishes… with a catch! Since this is Blumhouse, you probably know that the catch involves some sort of horror/thriller premise, and if you’ve seen the trailer, you might get some idea how it works… or not. (I wish I can say more but I’m under embargo!)
The rest of the cast is decent including Maggie Q (from Mission: Impossible 3), Lucy Hale, Portia Doubleday, Michael Rooker, Ryan Hansen, Jimmy O . Yang and more, plus it’s directed by Jeff Wadlow, who last did Blumhouse’s Truth Or Dare (a very bad movie!) and then Kick Ass 2 before that. (He was supposed to direct Sony’s upcoming Bloodshot movie but he left that to do other things, like this.)
Unfortunately, Sony Pictures Releasing (another specialized imprint from the parent company?) seems to have taken a cue from Screen Gems by deciding not to screen the movie for critics until Thursday afternoon (just like with The Grudge!), plus there won’t be ANY Thursday previews for this. It’s a shame since… well, I can’t really tell you if I liked the movie or not since I’m under embargo until Friday. J
Either way, it seems like a strong enough counter to Sonic and Birds of Prey that it should be good for $15 million plus over the four days. Personally, I think it would have opened even bigger if Sony and Blumhouse had shown some balls and screened it for critics in advance, but what do I know? I’ve only written about this stuff for ALMOST TWENTY FUCKING YEARS! (Not sure I’m gonna review the movie but we’ll see.)
I know far less about Universal’s Valentine’s Day offering THE PHOTOGRAPH (Universal), which I guess is a romantic drama that’s targeting African-Americans looking for something to see on the biggest date nights of the year. In fact, we’ve seen some interesting hits on this weekend just by putting “Date” in the movie title, as was the case with Adam Sandler-Drew Barrymore’s 50 First Dates ($45.1 million four-day opening) and even Date Movie ($21.8 million), which satirized romantic movies. But the real winner has to be a movie that went all out for Valentine’s Day by actually going with the title Valentine’s Day, which helped it open with $63 million over the four-day weekend ten years ago. ($23.4 million of that was on Valentine’s Day alone!)
Since I won’t see The Photograph until Weds. night, I can only talk about the little bit of marketing I’ve seen and what’s out there. Apparently, this is more in the vein of Valentine’s Day in that it’s a series of intertwined romantic stories, but it has an impressive cast of African-American actors who are on the verge of breaking out such as the great LaKeith Stanfield and amazing Kelvin Harrison Jr., as well as Rob Morgan (from “Daredevil” and Mudbound) and Courtney B. Vance. I’d be neglect if I didn’t mention any of the women involved and having Issa Raefrom the TV show “Insecure” as the primary female lead is something that shouldn’t be ignored. Stanfield isn’t the only connection to Jordan Peele, though, asLil Rel Howery from Get Outis also in this movie as is Peele’s actual wife, Chelsea Peretti!
I actually had to double check to make sure Peele wasn’t one of the film’s producers, but no, this is from Will Packer, a producer who is responsible for so many huge hits among African-Americans that one of these days I won’t underestimate his drawing power, even though all three of his 2019 movies underdelivered, including the comedy Little (co-starring Rae), although did well compared to their lower budgets.
In that sense, The Photograph could be compared to Packer’s Screen Gems comedy About Last Night, which opened with $27.8 million in just over 2,200 theaters in 2014, but that also had the power of proven box office draw Kevin Hartto bring in audiences. I certainly don’t want to be accused of underestimating Packer again, but with such a generic title and premise (and next to no marketing?), I’m just not sure the movie will deliver despite being decent counter-programming for AA audiences. With that in mind, I think the movie will probably make somewhere between $12 and 14 million.
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Then there’s DOWNHILL (Searchlight Studios), the new movie from The Way, Way Back directors Nat Faxon and Jim Rash (who also won the Oscar for cowriting Alexander Payne’s The Descendants), this one being a direct remake of Swedish filmmaker Ruben Östlund’s 2014 film Force Majeure.
In this version, Will Ferrell and Julia Louis-Dreyfus play a squabbling couple who travel to the alps with their kids, but after barely escaping an avalanche – one in which he runs away leaving his family behind – they start questioning their lives. The film also stars Zach Woods (also from “Veep”), Miranda Otto and Zoe Chao, and though it premiered at the Sundance Film Festival (just like the duo’s previous movie), it did not receive great reviews, as it currently sits at 48% on Rotten Tomatoes.
I don’t think that will matter since like Carey above, Ferrell hasn’t been oversaturating the market with movies in the past couple year, maybe because his last movie, Holmes & Watson, reteaming him with John C. Reilly from Step Brothers bombed with $41 million worldwide after horrifying reviews. Fortunately, Louis-Dreyfus is far more loved thanks to her run on “Seinfeld” and her Emmy-winning run on HBO’s “Veep,” and that should help get people into theaters despite all the competition aboe and below.
Searchlight (no more Fox!!) will be releasing the movie into roughly 1,500 theaters, a moderate release to see how it fares, and the extended holiday weekend (plus the chance of it attracting older moviegoers on Valentine’s Day) should help it make $5 million plus over the extended weekend.
Mini-Review: If you’re reading this review hoping for a play-by-play of how Downhill differs from Ruben Ostlund’s Force Majeure, then you’re bound to be disappointed, because a.) I don’t really remember it, b.) I wasn’t as big a fan of the movie as so many others, and c.) I’m going to assume that a lot of people never got around to seeing it.
In this version, it’s Ferrell and Louis-Dreyfus as Peter and Billie Stanton, and there’s much more focus on their roles as parents and the responsibility that goes with that. Once again, Peter runs off when a controlled avalanche comes their way, but they don’t really talk about it so much even as it hangs over their heads.
Nat Faxon and Jim Rash once again find a manageable way of making “dramedy” out of a situation, making sure not to go for constant visual laughs or the zaniness Ferrell usually goes for. (Granted, we can totally believe him as a careless father/husband who does dumb things.) In fact, Ferrell plays his role fairly toned down, which allows Louis-Dreyfus to shine in what’s, oddly, a quite rare movie appearance. How they deal with the aftermath of the avalanche comes to a head when Pete’s work-buddy Zack (Zach Woods) arrives with a ladyfriend (Zoe Chao) allows the two to go at each other. It doesn’t get quite as intense as Marriage Story, but it’s obvious that they both have reached the point in their marriage where they need a separation.
It is kind of amusing that Miranda Otto almost steals her scenes with the two leads because she’s so funny as a hot-to-trot European guest they keep running into and who sets Billie up with a hot Italian ski trainer. There’s a few other funny characters but it mostly stays on Ferrell and Louis-Dreyfus either alone or together, and that’ll be enough for most people.
Faxon and Rash find interesting ways to play with the basic premise, although Downhill is very much comedy with a lower-case “c,” and like the original movie, it should lead to some interesting conversations.
Rating: 7/10
This week’s Top 10 should look something like this… (bearing in mind that the below are all four-day projections). It’ll be interesting to see if the name change for “Birds of Prey” will make a difference, but look for NEON’s Parasite to make its first foray into the top 10 this weekend after 19 (!!!) weeks in theaters, thanks to its Best Picture win last Sunday.
1. Sonic the Hedgehog (Paramount) - $44 million N/A (up $1.5 million)* 2. Harley Quinn: Birds of Prey  (Warner Bros) - $20 million -39% (down $1.5 million)* 3. Blumhouse’s Fantasy Island (Sony) - $15.8 million N/A (up $.3 million)* 4. The Photograph (Universal) - $13.5 million N/A 5. Bad Boys for Life (Sony) - $8 million -35% (up .2 million)* 6. 1917 (Universal) - $7 million -23% 7. Downhill (Searchlight) - $5.6 million N/A (up .2 million)* 8. Parasite (NEON) - $5 million +300% (up .4 million and one place) 9. Dolittle  (Universal) - $4.5 million -30% (down .4 million and one place) 10. Jumanji: The Next Level  (Sony) - $4.2 million -24%
*UPDATE: A few minor updates based on actual theater counts with Parasite being expanded into 2,000 theaters, the widest its been so far. I feel like most of the new movies will do well, including Downhill (which will be in 2,301 theaters vs. the 1,500 estimated earlier in the week). Anyway, it should be a fairly hearty and robust weekend at the box office.
LIMITED RELEASES
Before we get to the regular limited releases opening Friday, I want to mention two special releases for Weds. night, Trafalgar Releasing is giving a one-night screening of The Doors: Break on Thru - A Celebration of Ray Manzarek, which I haven’t seen but I’m definitely interested in as a fan of the ‘60s group (and Manzarek’s keyboard work). You can get tickets for that here. Also, Kino Lorber is giving one-night release of Emily Taguchi & Jake Lefferman’s doc After Parkland to commemorate the second anniversary of the shootings at the Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School in Parkland, Florida that killed 17 people and began a nationwide student movement for gun control. It’s a fairly sobering and emotional doc, as you can imagine, especially since so little has been done to prevent incidents like this even two years later.
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My favorite movie of the weekend is Jeremy Teicher’s OLYMPIC DREAMS ( IFC Films), opening at the IFC Center Friday. It stars Nick Kroll (who you’ll know from “The League,” “Oh, Hello” and other things) and (actual Olympian distance runner) Alexi Pappas, who you may or may not be as familiar with. Pappas plays Penelope, an American competitor in the 2018 Winter Olympics in South Korea, who is feeling lonely and unable to connect with others until she meets Kroll’s volunteer dentist, Ezra. While at first, it wouldn’t seem like they would have anything in common, they spend a night hanging out and while some might be expecting something romantic, since this is opening on Valentine’s Day, well I won’t ruin what does or doesn’t happen, k?  Either way, it’s a wonderful film co-written by Teichter, Pappas and Kroll, and if that sounds like a familiar formula, then it is indeed the one Richard Linklater used for his sequels to Before Sunrise with Ethan Hawke and Julie Delpy. Olympic Dreams isn’t nearly as deep and philosophical (or wordy), but the two actors are so wonderful together, and they actually filmed this in the Athletes Village at the Olympics (the first film to do so) which adds some authenticity to the sweet little movie. (There will be a sneak preview Weds night at the IFC Center with Teicher, Kroll and Pappas all in attendance!)
Danish filmmaker Lone Scherfig returns with THE KINDNESS OF STRANGERS (Vertical), a star-studded ensemble piece starring Zoe Kazan, Andrea Riseborough, Caleb Landry Jones, Jay Baruchel and Bill Nighy (who appeared in Lone’s previous film Their Finest). This is a New York City story about six strangers whose lives intersect and mingle while trying to find help, hope and love. I know it sounds like the Crash-style movie we’ve seen far too many times before, but I have faith in Ms. Scherfig and hopefully I’ll have a chance to watch it in the next day or two.
I also still haven’t gotten around to watching Kenji Tanagaki’s action-comedy ENTER THE FAT DRAGON (Go WELL USA), starring the always-amazing Donnie Yen as police officer Zhu, who is sent to Japan on a routine police escort of a suspect… who mysteriously dies, forcing Zhu to call upon a former undercover inspector to help solve the murder. I’m assuming the latter is the “Fat Dragon” and Yen didn’t gain 200 lbs. for the part.
Opening at the Quad Cinemaon Friday and in L.A. on Feb. 21 is Dimitri de Clercq’sFrench/Belgian film You Go to My Head (First Run Features) about an architect who finds a young woman lost, alone and in a fog in the Sahara after a mysterious accident, but when he takes her to the hospital, he claims to be her husband. As she gets better, he creates an elaborate life to fill in the life they shared which she can no longer remember. It also sounds perfect for Valentine’s Day, so you have plenty of options!
I didn’t have too much to say about Céline Sciamma’s PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE (NEON), because I think I wrote about it last year, and I haven’t seen the movie since the New York Film Festival. Set in the 18thCentury, it’s about a woman painter who travels to a remote island where she’s commissioned to do a painting of a grieving widow, who she ends up falling in love with. I probably should see the movie again as it didn’t really connect with me the first time, but I can totally understand why others love it so much. (Unfortunately, the 7:10 screening on Friday night at the Angelika with a QnA moderated by my pal, Valerie Complex, is already sold out!)
The second documentary in the last year about a man named “Cunningham” (a different one this time) is Mark Bozek’s The Times of Bill Cunningham (Greenwich) about the famed photographer who died in 2016… and whom I know even less about than I did dancer/choreographer Merce Cunningham. Apparently, he was a New York Timesphotographer for four decades and had a long relationship with First Lady Jackie Kennedy, and this doc is even narrated by Sarah Jessica Parker! It also opens at the Angelika and City Cinemas 1, 2 & 3, and maybe L.A.?
Due to the usual conflicts and circumstances, I wasn’t able to see Lisa Barros D'Sa and Glenn Leyburn’s Ordinary Love (Bleecker Street) as planned, but it’s an appropriately-timed romantic drama starring Liam Neeson and Lesley Manville as a middle-aged couple who must deal with her beast cancer diagnosis. I actually am interested in seeing this, especially to see Neeson back in serious drama mode (it’s been a while), so hopefully I’ll have a chance to see this down the road.
Also opening Friday is Tanya Wexler’s Buffaloed (Magnolia), starring Zoey Deutch as Peg Dahl, a young woman living in Buffalo, the debt collection capital of America but hopes to get out of town and into an Ivy League university. When she’s accepted to her top choice but can’t afford the tuition, she gets pulled into the rope of debt collection.  Also starring Judy Greer, Germaine Fowler, Noah Reid and Jai Courtney, it will open at New York’s Quad Cinema, the Loz Feliz 3 in L.A., Buffalo’s North Park Theater and more theaters.
Opening at the Quad Cinemaon Friday and in L.A. on Feb. 21 is Dimitri de Clercq’sFrench/Belgian film You Go to My Head (First Run Features) about an architect who finds a young woman lost, alone and in a fog in the Sahara after a mysterious accident, but when he takes her to the hospital, he claims to be her husband. As she gets better, he creates an elaborate life to fill in the life they shared which she can no longer remember. It also sounds perfect for Valentine’s Day, so you have plenty of options!
Another SXSW 2019 movie is Richard Wong’s Come As You Are (Samuel Goldwyn), starring Gabourey Sidibe, Grant Rosenmeyer, Ravi Patel, Hayden Szeto and Janeane Garofolo. The three guys in the middle play men with disabilities who go on a road trip to a Montreal brothel to get away from their suffocating parents. Sidibe (from Precious) plays their travelling nurse who drives them across the border to help them lose their virginity. This is an English remake of the Belgian Film Hasta La Vista about the real-life adventure of Asta Philpot.
Sara Zandieh’s indie rom-com A Simple Wedding (Blue Fox Entertainment) also opens in theaters and On Demand on Valentine’s Day, this one following an Iranian-American named Nousha (Tara Grammy) whose hopes for a Persian wedding are dashed when she falls for a bisexual artist/DJ named Alex (Christopher O’Shea). She has to make sure her parents don’t realize they’re living together before marriage. The film also stars Shohreh Aghdashloo, Rita Wilson, Maz Jobrani, Peter McKenzie and James Eckhouse.
LOCAL FESTIVALS
Some cool festivals and series in New York are happening this weekend to offer competition for all the choices above.
Let’s begin with the “Winter Showcase” for one of my favorite annual film festivals, the New York Asian Film Festivalsubtitled “Love at First Bite,” since they’re including a special Valentine’s Day screening of the Korean hit Extreme Job followed by a reception including delicious Korean food. The rest of the line-up is probably more appropriate for the rep section as it will including Asian classics like Stephen Chow’s God of Cookery (1996), Ang Lee’s Eat Drink Man Woman (1994),Tampopo (1985) on Saturday, as well as Ritesh Batra’s amazing The Lunchbox and more on Sunday.
Up at Film at Lincoln Center, there’s the annual “Neighboring Scenes,” the annual celebration of “New Latin American Cinema,” opening Friday with Joanna Reposi Garibaldi’s Lemebel, a documentary about writer/visual artist Pedro Lemebel and his controversial performances amidst Chilean upheaval. Of course, I’m most interested in the Brazilian offerings, but sadly, there just isn’t enough time in the day/week to see as many of the films in this series I’m curious about including the New York premiere of Ema from Chile’s Pablo Larrain (Neruda, Jackie). Click on the link above and check out that line-up.
Further North (in terms of global geography) but South (in terms of New York City geography) is this year’s “Canada Now” series, taking place at the IFC Center from Thursday through Sunday. It will kick off with Guest of Honor, the new film from Canada’s Atom Egoyan, starring David Thewlis and Laysla De Oliveira as father and music school teacher daughter whose lives become complicated when she’s put in prison for earlier crimes. There are seven other movies in this series, most of them getting their U.S. debuts, so that’s another alternative for what could be a busy movie-going weekend.
STREAMING AND CABLE
Lots of stuff premiering on streaming services this weekend including the British animated sequel A Shaun the Sheep: Farmageddon on Netflix, as well as the rom-com sequel To All the Boys: PS I Still Love You, which will premiere on Weds and may end up being the “Netflix and chill” choice for many young people on V-Day. (I honestly never got around to seeing the first movies of either of those yet!)
Over on Hulu, they’re premiering the gender-swapped series loosely based on Nick Horny’s High Fidelity, this one starring Zoe Kravitz, the daughter of Lisa Bonet, who appeared opposite John Cusack in Stephen Frears’ adaptation of Hornby’s book from 2000 that was one of my favorite movies that year! Wait a second, even though Kravitz plays a character named Rob, just like Cusack, is she meant to be the daughter of Cusack and Bonet’s characters in that movie? That would be intense! (But probably not. I’m sure I’ll check it out.)
REPERTORY
METROGRAPH (NYC):
The Metrograph’s Valentine’s Dayweekend offerings include Casablanca (1942), Howard Hawks’ 1944 film To Have and  Have Not, the 1932 film Trouble in Paradise, Douglas Sirk’s Written on the Wind (1956) and another screening of Makoto Shinkai’s animated Your Name. The “To Hong Kong with Love” series continues through the end of February, this weekend screening Yellowing (2016), which I haven’t seen.This weekend, the  Welcome To Metrograph: Reduxwill offer two more screenings of Edward Yang’s 4-hour 1991 film A Brighter Summer Day, while Late Nites at Metrograph  will screen Nagisa Oshima’s 1978 film Empire of Passion, also which I have never seen! Rounding out the weekend’s Asian offering is the Playtime: Family Matineesoffering of Yoshifumi Kondo’s 1995 animated film Whisper of the Heart, which guess what? I haven’t seen that either! Clearly, I need to try to get to one of the four movies, right?  
ALAMO DRAFTHOUSE BROOKLYN (NYC)
Tonight’s “Weird Wednesday” is the Susan Sarandon-James Spader romantic drama White Palace (1990). Oddly, the Alamo is CLOSED on Valentine’s Day.. is this true?!? On Sunday is a special “Drew Believers: Drew Barrymore Movie Marathon” with four of Barrymore’s movies in 35mm! (As of this writing, there are a few seats available near the front.) Monday’s “Fist City” is Sam Raimi’s The Quick and The Dead from 1995 and that’s quickly selling out as well. The “Terror Tuesday” is James Gunn’s hilarious Slither and then next week’s “Weird Wednesday” is the 1987 Ken Russell film Gothic.
THE NEW BEVERLY (L.A.):
Wednesday’s “Afternoon Classic” is the 1961 Oscar-winning musical West Side Story. Weds and Thursday night’s double feature is Robert Altman’s 1971 film McCabe & Mrs. Miller and Sydney Pollack’s 1972 film Jeremiah Johnson, starring Robert Redford. This week’s “Freaky Friday” offering is the classic The Bride of Frankenstein (1935, while Friday’s midnight movie is True Romanceand Saturday’s midnight is 1978’s Mean Dog Blues in 16mm! This weekend continues the “Kiddee Matinee” run with the Alfonso Cuaron-directed Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Monday’s matinee of David Lynch’s Wild at Heart is already sold out but that night is a Robert Clouse double feature of The Pack(1977) and Darker than Amber (1970). Tuesday’s Grindhouse double feature is 1976’s Sky Riders and 1981’s Force: Five.  
EGYPTIAN THEATRE (LA):
Thursday is a “Black Voices” double feature of Car Wash (1976) and Cooley High (1975) with guest including Bill Duke in person. John Sayles and Joe Dante will be on hand Friday night for a “John Sayles: Independent” double feature of Piranha (1978) and The Howling (1981). This weekend is the “HFPA Restoration Summit” including a Saturday afternoon presentation called “Serge Bromberg Presents from the Silent Era” with the Lobster Films founder, while the one and only Jane Fonda will be on-hand Saturday evening to present a 4k restoration of the 1972 film F.T.A., which she produced with Donald Sutherland. Saturday night is a screening of The Black Vampire, the 1953 Argentine adaptation of Fritz Lang’s M, and there’s more classic cinema on Sunday as part of the series.
AERO  (LA):
Thursday’s “Antiwar Cinema” matinee is Richard Attenborough’s Oh! What a Lovely War from 1969 with an all-star cast, while that night is a Eugene Levy/Christopher Guest double feature of A Might Windand For Your Consideration. The AERO is ALSO showing Casablancaon Valentine’s Day and then Saturday is another Levy/Guest double feature of Best in Show (2000)and Waiting for Guffman  (1996) with Levy doing a discussion between films. John Sayles and Frances McDormand will appear in person for a Sunday afternoon double feature of 1996’s Lone Star and 1999’s Limbo.
MUSEUM OF THE MOVING IMAGE (NYC):
MOMI is going a bit crazy with its Valentine’s offering but it’s a good one…Jane Fonda in 1968’s Barbarella as part of its new 2001-inspired series “See It Big! Outer Space”! (If MOMI wasn’t all the way in Astoria, I’d totally go.)  It will play again Sunday with Tarkovsky’s Solaris (1972) playing on Friday and Saturday and 1979’s Star Trek: The Motion Pictureon Sunday. Sunday will also be a repeat of Kubrick’s 1969 film 2001: A Space Odyssey in 70mm with a discussion before the movie between Doug Trumbull and Piers Bizony. There’s also the usual DCP screening of 2001on Saturday afternoon, as part of the exhibition. On Saturday, they’ll screen Marjane Satrapi’s excellent Persepolis(2007) as part of its “World of Animation.”
FILM FORUM (NYC):
Starting Friday, the Forum will be screening a DCP restoration of Luchino Visconti’s L’Innocente (1976), starring Giancarlo Giannini. This weekend’s “Film Forum Jr.” is Guys and Dolls from 1955, starring Marlon Brando, Jean Simmons and Frank Sinatra. (If you read this on Wednesday, you can catch Joseph Strick’s 1963 film The Balcony, starring Shelley Winters, Peter Falk and Lee Grant, in 35mm.
QUAD CINEMA (NYC):
The Quad’s run of Pandora and the Flying Dutchman continues through the weekend, and there will be Valentine’s Day screenings of Alex Cox’s Sid and Nancy on Thursday and Friday night. (How romantic!)
ANTHOLOGY FILM ARCHIVES (NYC):
The Anthology’s great “The Devil Probably: A Century of Satanic Panic” continues this weekend with screenings of Robert Eggers’ The Witch, Alan Parker’s Angel Heart, another screening of Rosemary’s Baby, as well as screenings of Race with the Devil on Weds. and Thursday night. I missed it last week but they’ve been showing Mark Rappaport’s 1975 film Mozart in Love the past week, as well.
ROXY CINEMA (NYC)
The Cage-athon continues Weds. with Neil Labute’s The Wicker Man (2006) and 2009’s Knowing on Thursday. Valentine’s Day sees screening of Baz Lurhmann’s Romeo + Juliet, starring Leonardo DiCaprio and Claire Danes, as well as the 1987 Nicolas Cage movie Moonstruck, co-starring Cher. Spike Jonez and Charlie Kaufman’s Adaptation (2003), starring Cage, repeats on Saturday.
NITEHAWK CINEMA  (NYC):
Williamsburg‘s “Uncaged” series continues Friday with last year’s Mandy at midnight and 1983’s Valley Girl on Saturday morning. Casabalanca is also playing at the Prospect Park on Thursday, and unrelated but Back to the Future will play there on Monday night. Billy Wilder’s 1954 film Sabrina, starring Bogart, Hepburn and Holden will play on Saturay morning.
IFC CENTER (NYC)
Weekend Classics: Luis Buñuel is back with Belle de Jour from 1967, starring Catherine Deneuve.  Waverly Midnights: Hindsight is 2020 will screen the animated Ghost in the Shell, while Late Night Favorites: Winter 2020 will also go with an Anime film, Paprika.
MOMA  (NYC):
Modern Matinees: Jack Lemmon is off Weds. and Thursday but will return Friday with Billy Wilder’s Irma La Douce (1963).
BAM CINEMATEK (NYC):
BAM will continue to show Horace Jenkins’ 1982 film Cane River through the weekend.
Next week, the second to last week of February (man, it flew right by!) will include Fox’s The Call of the Wild, starring Harrison Ford, and the horror sequel, Brahms: The Boy II.
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buscaosotroarbol · 5 years
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I saw a Reddit thread of teachers sharing fucked up stuff they had learned about kids
And it was full of awful stories about things that should never happen to kids and I felt so glad that, in my short experience, I hadn't encountered anything like that. But it also got me thinking about how much "small" stuff that makes up a big chunk of the base of the piramid I mentally call "EVERYTHING FUCKED UP WITH THE SYSTEM", will never attract attention, or make sentational news while it still manages to fuck up the lives of tons of kids.
Last year I worked on the afternoons on a (I don't know how to say it in English) kind of after-school academy (?) to pay for my degree. Kids went there because they were lagging behind, because of bad behaviour, or they were doing fine but their parents were working. My job was helping them with humanities related subjects. I had two brothers in different classes, and I was warned about the older one (11yo, we'll call him Mike) because he was supposed to be real trouble, academically useless, and even violent. The truth was both kids displayed similar attitudes, which were considered cute in the little brother, while all the staff had come to an agreement that Mike was evil incarnate or something.
Sure enough, he tried to troll me from the begining, lied about homework and tests, refused to work,... I humoured him when he lied or said things to try to shock me, if he said "I can't work because I forgot my English book" I'd be like "oh what a TRAGEDY, but don't worry Mike I'll print out a hand out with exercises for you I literally have 20 English textbooks here" and he'd go "oh woah Miss you're not gonna believe this I just found my book" and I'd be like "spooky". I tried to work as much as possible with him (whithout ignoring the other kids, which, wasn't always easy by the way). He started to behave a lot better in my classes, put effort in his homework... I realized he was actually pretty smart, and also, that he was wildly insecure about it, I guess because everyone around him treated him like he was dumb. Sometimes he would lie about the subjects he had to work on, so my boss (science dude) let him stay two hours in my class instead of one in each, and then he'd just pull out his math homework in my class and dare me to snitch on him.
I won't forget the first day he came through the door and instead of going to his seat he came to my table to show me an Spanish language exam with what would be, in our system an A-. Fuck I would've put that on my fridge.
However, as I was seeing this development, my colegues kept mentioning what a fuck up the kid was and even said goodbye to the little brother but not to him and other very rude stuff.
One day, Mike very politely told me that another kid was making fun of him for being slow, and that if he kept it up, he was going to beat him up after class. He told me so I could, as the adult in charge I was supposed to be, do something to prevent it. But I just told the other kid to stop and kept working, and didn't realize he was serious until the hour was up and, true to his word, Mike picked up his stuff quickly and went behind the other kid. As soon as the glass door closed behind them I saw him grab the kid by his hoodie, yank him back and kick him hard in the back, throwing him to the ground. He was about to hit him again when I got to them and separated them. While I checked if the other kid was alright, Mike made sure I saw him throw his homework in the trashcan in front of the building.
I had to tell my boss about it and I felt awful, because I knew how it would look for Mike, specially since he hit a non-problematic kid who got all straight As. But as complex as you think the situation is, you just... cannot justify violence. Still, I tried to explain that I thought we should work with both kids, because on the one hand, Mike might have anger management issues, and on the other hand, the other kid had a pattern of manipulating the teachers to get them to punish other kids, and in particular, he enjoyed riling Mike up. But I think my boss only heard "evil child confirmed".
The next day, Mike had an hour with my boss and then one with me. I heard my boss's voice rising through the wall during the 1st hour and when his class finished he scorted Mike to my class and said "He's not going to do anything today, ok? He's just going to sit in a corner and not talk". I didn't understand. "But he was an exam tomorrow" I answered, and my boss said "He doesn't care, right Mike?". And I didn't want to agree so I just said "We'll see what we do, if you don't mind..." and kinda (softly, because I am a coward) closed the door on him.
Mike refused to even open his bag. I got the other kids started on their homework and went back to him, asked him if he wanted to tell me what had happened. He said no, but later he was clearly talking to another classmate about it and the kid he hit was behind them and he raised his hand and said "Miss, Mike just said you're an asshole." Suddenly Mike turns to him, and then to me, like, horrified, I shit you not, and he starts getting really worked up, and starts saying "That's not true! I didn't say that!" and other kid goes "You said "asshole", I heard you!", and this goes on back and forth for a minute until Mike just turns to me and says "But I didn't say it about you! I swear, you're not, you're not. He is." And at that every kid in the class goes *surprised Pikachu* because we all know that he means my boss, and they're all looking at me waiting for my reaction. And I don't know what the right thing to do is, because I can't just openly antagonize my boss in front of the class, but the kid is so upset, and I just blurt out a super lame "Mike, we don't say swearwords." And he says again "But it wasn't about you..." like he really needs me to know that, like he doesn't know that I'm on his side, man, I've been on this kids' side for months, and I look at him and I wish I would telepathically convey "I KNOW MY BOSS IS AN ASSHOLE AND YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO BE SHOUTED AT" while verbally saying "I know. I know. But we don't say swearwords, ok?" and he kinda calmed down and said "Ok", and I think he understood, that I had to scold him about the language, but that I wasn't denying the sentiment behind it. He opened his Spanish book and started to study for his exam.
I had agreed with my boss at the very beginning to end my contract in time for the last part of my school year, so I would be free to study for the exams, and the date was getting close, but as it was going to "interrupt" the kids' routine, and parents might complain, he wanted to make it seem as if something had come up suddenly in my life so I had to leave. So: I was forbidden from saying goodbye to the kids. This was very dramatic™ at the time, and I remember being like "fuck I'm gonna cry. and the children won't even know WHY". But don't worry I did actually get to say goodbye to them, because my boss overshares like hell he told some of the kids in his class that I was leaving (he told them I had to go back to my village or something) and then it was a big mess, because I didn't know any kid knew and suddenly a lil girl in my class goes "Miss, is it true that you're leaving?" and my brain went blank because I wasn't prepared and I CAN'T ACTUALLY LIE so I kinda went "I... might have to?" and annoying kid™ says "Not might, you will, [InsertMyBossName] just told us." And Mike, who had been uncannily well behaved since the incident the week before asks "You're leaving us?" like I have betrayed them or something and. Man. my heart. hurts. ok? I say that I'm staying until the end of the month still and he's like "That's fine" but he was super cold about it, and he ignored me for the most part of my last 2 weeks at the academy, he just read a book he had to read for class, refused to have any of the candy I brought for them the last days and I got the strong impression that I was being punished by someone less than half my age.
On what I thought was my second to last class with him but was actually the last, he came to the teacher table and asked me "Do you want to know something?", and I said "Of course, tell me" and he said "You're leaving on Thursday?" knowing this was a delicate subject, I nodded. He smiled and said "I'm leaving tomorrow... I told my mom. She's taking us out. My brother too."
We spent the last half an hour discussing Shrek, and memes. And I didn't make any effort to make them go back to their homework and I know that wasn't very professional but in my defense they mostly didn't have anything to do either way. When we were closing I asked my boss about the brothers and he said that the mom had come to tell him that she wouldn't be paying for the next month and he added "Hey, don't worry about Mike, he's a lost cause." I said "I really don't think so", and he just shrugged.
I was so glad, that for whatever reason (I like to think that I helped but probably it was the fight with my boss that did it) this kid had gotten serious enough with his mom that she believed him. That she realised that the adults that were supposed to help her kid, though that he was a mess, were actually so sure, so set on believing that he was a mess, that they were actually turning him into one.
I only saw Mike again once. I was running to catch a bus and the three of them (mother and kids) were, I guess, waiting for another bus. I smiled and waved at them while fumbling with my bag, laptop and coat and taking out my bus card and Mike lit up and waved shouting "Bye Miss [My name] :D!". And his mom narrowed her eyes at me and watched me until I got on the bus and disapeared from their lives. And you know what? I'm fucking glad she did. If she doesn't trust anyone who worked at that place? I'm fucking glad, I'm happy as long as she's listening to that kid. Because a bunch of full grown men and women, in charge of a teaching center, had decided that a kid was a lost cause, at the age of fucking 11.
A kid cannot possibly be a lost cause. They just can't. Kids are not a finished product, kids have just started, and if you're a constant presence in their lives you have to know that you're going to be a factor on the development of that finished product. You don't get to, Idk, dump seven spoonfuls of salt into a bowl of cookie doug and say "Pf, it's unedible, we migh as well throw a bunch of nails and a couple flip-flops in there".
I don't know where I'm going with this metaphor okay? but there's tons of Mikes out there. There's a ton of kids who need support, not punishment, not to be treated like potential thugs but like kids, which is what they are. It doesn't matter what you think they'll be in 10 years and it's irrelevant if you end up being right because now, in this moment, they are kids.
I guess, what I'm trying to say is, fucking be kind with children. okay? Please.
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