#steve rogers and reader

[anonymityisfunwriter]

To Know Him Is To Love Him

summary: to know steve rogers is to love him. to know him is to keep handing over your heart over and over again. to know him is to be broken by him.

pairing: steve rogers x reader

an: quick someone give this to a boy to read and ask him what steve did wrong. it's for science.

Anon's 1K Celebration

to know him is to love him.

to know him is to stand by him.

to know him is to allow him to break your heart over and over again.

to know him is to hope that one day he'll finally see.

to know him is to be broken by him.

you can't count how many times he put you here, put in this situation. and worse, you can't count how many times you've let him put you in this situation.

three months ago...

you fix steve's tie, patting his shoulder to send him off on yet another date - after he invited himself into your apartment to get him ready for his date. you hated this feeling, the feeling of unrequited love.

you can't blame him, he doesn't know. at least, you think he doesn't know. in fact, you're sure he doesn't, he would never hurt you like that.

"i swear if this date doesn't go well, i'm swearing off women for good."

"does that mean i'm out a friend?" you tease.

"no, of course not," steve laughs. "you're my best friend. you don't count."

your smile falls at the words fall out of his mouth with ease. you don't count. you're not even a consideration. "i don't count as a woman?"

"you know what i meant. you're my friend."

you don't know what he meant. not in the slightest.

"right," you clear your throat, shaking your head with furrowed brows. "good luck on your date."

two months ago...

"i would tell him, but he's just - he's confusing," you admit. "i get a lot of mixed signals."

"men are just idiots," nat offers in consolation. "someday, he'll see. you're perfect for each other."

"thanks." you smile, walking back to your table with a fresh round of drinks. "what are you guys talking about?"

"about steve's terrible dating record," sam jokes.

"ah," you hum, you settle in the booth beside him, leaving plenty of room between the two of you.

steve frowns at you, reaching behind you and gripping your waist. without a word, he slides you until you're pressed against his thigh.

sam humorously snorts, "i don't get you two. you're attached at the hip. you're both attractive singles. make it official already."

you look to steve's reaction for any indication of what he's feeling. steve leans over, kissing your temple, "she knows she's my other half, my soulmate. we don't need labels."

"soulmate?" sam teases.

you shift uncomfortably. he never asked you that, never asked you if you wanted a label. he's never even asked you on a real date, but now he's declaring that he's your soulmate.

how blind can he be?

one month ago...

"please, i miss you, sweetheart." you squeeze your eyes shut. the term of endearment rolls so easily off his tongue. "i feel like i haven't seen you in forever."

it's intentional. you're trying to get over him. to move past these feelings. he doesn't make it easy. "i know, i've just been busy."

"how about dinner tonight? my place at 8?"

you chew on the inside of your cheek, hesitant to accept his dinner invite, "i don't know, steve."

"please, i need you."

putting distance between you and steve rogers didn't work. not when he so dutifully sought you out. not when he told you over and over again that he missed you. that he didn't know how to be without you.

his words toy with your head just enough to convince that it's a good idea to enter his gravitational orbit again.

you're not strong enough to resist the pull. you're not strong enough to to say no. you never have been.

you decide that you can't do this. you're going to tell him. you'll tell him. you'll tell him that you want to count. you'll tell him that you want him to see you.

to know him is to love him, you remember. the moment you see him, you crumble. that smile that makes it feel like your life is worthwhile. the eyes that send your rational mind into a haze. to know him is to love him.

he doesn't make it easy for you or your heart. he greets you at the door with a beaming grin, his eyes lighting up. it makes you feel like this is more than just a dinner. it feels like you're finally coming home to him.

you falter as his fingers graze your skin to take off your jacket. the apartment isn't his usual scene either. it feels like so much more than just a normal hangout. it feels... romantic. music spinning on his record player, marvin gaye, you recognize. candles lit in the center of the table. the smell of a home cooked meal simmering over the stove.

you turn to him with a nervous smile, "i thought you we were ordering pizza or something."

"i wanted to do something nice for my best girl."

his best girl.

he spends the whole dinner fawning over you. his hand rests on your leg. the other occasionally grazing the back of your hand. he asks you all about your work, about your love life.

"i missed you so much."

you're so entranced by him that your carefully thought out speech is gone, replaced by a soft whisper, "i love you."

"i love you, too." he smiles down at him. his eyes shining bright and blue. it doesn't even occur to him that you're professing your love for him. "i can't imagine my life without you."

you shake your head, reminding yourself that you had to tell him. you needed to move forward, one way or another. "no, steve, i - i'm in love with you."

an anxious chuckle leaves his mouth. his hand drops from your thigh, leaving you feeling cold, hollow, and abandoned. "what?"

you know a rejection when you see one. at least you can move on now. your heart can begin to heal. maybe in time, you could be friends again. "i just had to tell you. just once."

"i don't -" he licks his lips. "i'm sorry, i don't feel the same."

"i understand."

2 weeks ago...

you sigh at yourself, hearing the familiar ding of another voicemail on your phone.

each one chips away at your resolve, each one shatters your broken heart even more.

you told him you understood. you told him that it was okay. you spent the night consoling him. you soothed his fears that he would lose you.

in return, he made you promise to always be in his life. with a broken heart and wounded pride, you weren't strong enough to say no. you simply asked for time and a little space.

time and space that steve had no interest in giving you.

you made it easy for him. you retreated from mutual friends. from social spaces you occupied. you no longer texted or called first. you just needed time.

still, he sought you out.

you've gained enough strength to stop answering his every call and text. you've stuck to your boundaries, at least, the ones steve doesn't seem intent on steamrolling past.

you clutch your kitchen counter with your head hung low. with a couple deep breaths and reminders that he doesn't feel the same for you, you're slowly glad you didn't answer. you're proud of yourself for being strong and doing what's best for you.

at least, you're glad until there's a banging at your door.

your mending heart regrets the moment you answer.

"steve?"

"you weren't answering," he pants, clutching the frame of your doorway, "i wanted to hear your voice."

"steve..." you sputter. "this isn't - it's-"

"i just miss you," he cuts you off. he looks so heartbroken, so sincere. he misses you. you try to not make anything more of it, but then he says it again, "i miss you so much."

you stand to the side, allowing him to pass, "come in."

"thank you," he sighs in relief.

"what happened?"

"the worst date of my life."

you swear you can feel your heart fracturing. the air feels like its being squeezed out of your lungs.

and still, you stand before him trying to look as unaffected as possible. you don't know how effective it is. you don't think he sees you enough to notice either way. "you were on a date?"

"it was awful. she was vapid and boring and - and pretentious - and - and she wasn't you."

you suck in a breath, "steve..."

these were words from a man who did not love you, from a man that did not count you. they sounded an awful lot like the love he claimed he didn't feel.

suddenly, he cups your face, standing too close to you. this wasn't what friends did. this isn't how friends treated each other. you know that.

and then he kisses you. soft and tenderly. his lips mold against yours perfectly. you swear it's a sigh of relief that leaves his mouth when you don't pull away.

you smile against his lips. a sense of rightness overtakes you. he overwhelms you. he consumes you. he grips your waist tightly. the other hand caressing your cheek.

"steve.." you sigh against his lips.

and he freezes. his hands drop as though you burned him. his lips slightly swollen and shining from the kiss. he wipes his mouth, "i should go."

you shake your head. you don't want to believe that this is happening right now. this is steve. the person you loved with every fiber of your being. your friend. you trusted him. you believed in him. he wouldn't hurt you like that. even if he didn't love you, even as just a friend, he wouldn't take advantage of your love for him like that. "what?"

"i should go."

and he leaves without another word.

your heart isn't just broken anymore, it's crumbled into a million little pieces. you're not sure you'll ever be able to fix it.

1 week ago...

he's blown past all your defenses. he's drained every ounce of strength from you. he's taken everything except your broken heart and your love for him. that's all that's left of you.

to know him is to love him. to know him is to be broken by him.

he calls and this time, you answer. you fear him coming back to your apartment like he did before. your heart couldn't take it anymore.

"hi, steve." your voice is so gravelly and hollow, a shell of the fullness and life it used to contain.

you noticed everything about him. his likes, his dislikes. you could tell the day he was having by the way he said hi, by the sort of smile he gave you. you're not sure why you just realized that it's not reciprocated at all. he once told you he loved the sound of your voice, how could he not hear the broken tone? if he notices, which you're sure he doesn't, he doesn't ask.

you can hear the smile in his voice, "i'm so glad you answered."

you're not even sure that he realizes you've put the phone down. after all, you're just his space filler.

now...

you don't know why you're surprised he showed up at your door again. you're not surprised that you opened the door. you're not surprised that you let him back into your home. you're not even surprised that he's talking to you like everything is normal.

the only thing that takes you by surprise is your unwillingness to hear about the misadventures of his dating life.

"steve," you try to interrupt.

"and all i want -"

"steve."

"is for someone to really hear me, to see -"

"steve." you're surprised by the harshness in your own voice. his eyes flash over to you, widened slightly in shock. "you - you have to go now."

his brow furrow, he's taken aback. it occurs to you that he has no idea what he's done wrong. "why?"

"you know why," you spit at him.

"no, you said you understood. you said we could still be friends."

"friends?" you bitterly chuckle. "friends don't hurt their friends over and over again."

"i don't understand."

"that's the problem, steve. you don't get it. you don't get that i don't want to hear about the girls you date. you don't get that it hurts hearing you talk about what you're looking for in a woman. it hurts when call me at the end of the night because you want to hear my voice."

"they why do you answer the phone?"

"because i love you!" you hopelessly exclaim. "because i’ll do anything for you. i’ll do anything you say. and i think you know that."

"am i just supposed to know that you didn’t want to hear about them?"

"no girl wants that," you whisper. "no one wants to hear about everything they don’t have."

"i don't understand what's happening here. you promised me that you would always be in my life!" his accusing tone offends you far more than it should.

a tear slips down your cheek. "that was before."

"before? before what?"

each word hurts. he really doesn't know. he doesn't think about you at all. not as a consideration. not as a woman. not even as just a friend. he doesn't see you at all. "i can do this anymore. it’s too hard. i can - i can’t keep letting you break my heart."

"i told you that i didn’t feel the same. you knew i wasn’t in a space to - to reciprocate."

"and then you kissed me!"

he stiffens at the kiss that he refused to mention. all those nights he spent on the phone with you, talking to you. it was the one thing he never spoke about. "i - i know that wasn’t right. and i’m sorry, okay? i’m sorry i did that. i was hurting."

"you were hurting?" your breaths come out in fragments, with each heave of your chest you can hear the whistle of emptiness where your heart used to reside. "you - you knew how i felt and you knew you didn’t feel the same and you kissed me anyway."

"it was a mistake. i'm sorry."

your hands ball up in frustration, tear burn at the corners of your eyes. "it’s not just about the kiss. it’s - it’s everything. it’s you. you won’t let me go. let me move on. please."

steve staggers back, "i don’t- i'm not trying to hold on to you."

"why did you call me the other night?"

"because you’re my friend. you’re the person i wanted to talk to. you understand. you always understand."

"i don’t. i don’t understand. it crushed me."

he reaches out for your hand. hurt flashes in his eyes when you snatch it out of his reach. you can't let him blind you this time. "you’re always there for me. even when no one else is, you are."

you snort, "you don’t even know what you did wrong, do you?"

"you’re my best friend. i just - i wanted you hear your voice."

"you see? you keep messing with my head. you tell me that i'm the person you want to talk to at the end of the night. you tell people that i'm your soulmate. you tell me that you don’t feel the same. i tell you i want to move on. you kiss me. then you go on a date with another girl. when it doesn’t work out, you call me. i'm done. i can’t do this anymore. loving you is breaking me far beyond repair."

"i do love you."

you fervently shake your head over and over again, "you don’t mean that."

"i love you and i know it’s not in the same way but maybe - just give me time."

"time isn’t going to fix this. you don’t love me. you love the way i make you feel. you love being loved."

he scoffs, shooting a glare at you, "that’s not fair."

"no, it’s not," you agree. "and it’s not fair that you know how i feel and yet you just keep hurting me. you do it over and over again. and i keep letting you."

steve reaches for you again, "we can fix this."

you shake him off, striding to your door, opening it for him, "you should go."

"please," steve begs.

"goodbye, steve."

you don't know how you gather the strength to close the door on the man you love more than anything, let alone the man begging to stay in your life. the door clicks shut behind him.

a choked sob escapes your mouth as tears freely fall.

to know him is to love him, and you don't want to know a thing about steve rogers anymore.

AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Anon's 1K Celebration

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

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[imtryingbuck]

Too Late.

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Steve Rogers x fem!Reader

Summary: Y/n’s Steves girlfriend and she’s been taken by Hydra, will he get to her in time? Will she want to go with him if he does?

Word count: 2,237

Warnings: angst. cheating. nat and steve are terrible people. pregnancy. miscarriage. tiny mention of being sick. swearing. ending is terrible sorry.

A/N: women aren’t failures or less of a woman if they have miscarriages, unfortunately and sadly it’s a natural thing.

Part 2

Masterlist

Why he kept doing it was beyond him.

The first time it happened both swore that it was a mistake, second time was a mistake too. The third time was to blow off steam from a rough mission. The fourth time, a mistake.

Now they’ve lost count of how many mistakes there’s been.

They know there’s been too many “this is the last time” before they end up in the same position.

Even though he knew what he was doing was wrong he just couldn’t stop.

When he woke that morning he knew he had fucked up. In the whole time that they’d been fucking he never fell asleep, he always headed home afterwards. He never once woke up with her in his arms. This was intimate, something that they didn’t do. It was just sex. They barely kissed, it was rough, he barely touched her other than her hips or his hand on her head as he pushed her face further into the pillow, further away from his mind - from his guilt.

Finding his phone he jumped up out of the bed his heart in his throat at the 22 missed calls and the one text message. He made her have a number that she would send to him for emergencies. For when she wasn’t or felt safe.

He received the number 4 in-between the many missed calls.

“Shit, baby pick up.” He chanted as he picked his clothes up off the floor and shoving them on in a hurry.

“St-Steve?” A woman’s voice came from the bed.

“Get up. Somethings wrong with Y/n”

“Shit”

Natasha took the sheet to cover herself as she rose from the bed, her too putting her clothes back on in a hurry.

Steve ran out of the room finding the team in the kitchen, Natasha soon following. “H-has Y/n called any of you? Somethings wrong”

Receiving a chorus of no’s his heart plummeted in to the depth of his stomach. Not giving any thought to it he took off running to the garage.

Speeding through the busy streets Steve kept trying to ring Y/n, heart rate going through the roof every time he heard her voicemail. Not even parking the car he jumped out and ran up to their apartment, Bucky and Sam quick on his heels.

“No no no no no” the door was open halfway.

“Y/n? Baby, I’m home…” he tried, Bucky and Sam swore they never heard Steve’s voice sound so small.

Taking small steps into the apartment he has shared with his girlfriend for the past three years he felt like he couldn’t breathe.

The grey couch was tipped on its side, cushions once nearly placed on said couch now lay on the floor. Pieces of glass from the photo frames they had hung up, littered the ground. Trinkets and ornaments belonging to Y/n, that took her ages to get a nice collection going was broken on the floor amongst the mess.

But that’s not what caused him to loose his breath, no, it was the small puddle of blood in the middle of their living room, droplets leading to where he stood and behind him.

Bucky made his way around the wall that was Steve and did a sweep of the apartment in signs of his best friends girlfriend. Sam took off in the direction of where Bucky was calling his name. Five minutes later they both emerged from the bedroom, Bucky holding two things in his hands.

“S-Steve…”

“What are they?”

“A phone…and um, a…a pregnancy test.” Bucky stuttered out, his heart pounding violently.

“W-what does the test say?” Nat questioned quietly from behind Steve as she stood with the rest of the Avengers.

“It-its positive”

No one moved as Steve hunched over and puked up.

Just as he was about to stand the phone started ringing. Bucky answered and put it on loud speaker.

“You’ve been a naughty boy Steven so we took your girlfriend. You have less then… ten hours to find her, hopefully she won’t be too mad at you. Hail Hydra” the voice on the other end of the phone chuckled darkly before hanging up.

“What the fuck is going on?” Tony demanded.

“I-I don’t know, we need to find her. I can’t lose her”

“We’ll find her don’t worry” Nat says as she put a comforting hand on his arm, Steve looked at her hand in disgust and yanked his arm away as if she had burned him.

“Don’t. Ever. Touch. Me. Again.” Steve growled in her ear quietly, even Bucky didn’t hear.

Her head throbbed, her whole body ached and was sore when she finally came to.

“Ah you’re awake, finally. I’m Conrad and I’ll be here to help you through this very tough time”

“W-where am I?”

“With Hydra darling. Believe it or not but you’re safe, I promise”

“Really? You pricks attacked me and you want me to believe you when you say I’m safe?” She chuckled with a head shake.

“I know, that wasn’t suppose to happen but we didn’t realise that one of Captain Americas girlfriends was so feisty, well we knew one was but not you” he says.

“W-what are you talking about?”

“Oh didn’t you know? Weird. Steve has another girlfriend. You know her, Natasha also known as the black widow.”

Her heart cracked but she didn’t believe him, he was a member of Hydra for Christ sake. “Your lying”

“Hold on. Matthews turn the screen on and let’s show our guest where her hero is.”

The bright light from the tv screen she hadn’t even noticed was there, nearly blinded her. Conrad told Matthews to press play, her soul felt like it had died.

There was her boyfriend on six years thrusting in and out of her best friend.

“T-t-turn it o-off”

“No. Look in the right corner where his jeans are, open your eyes and do it Y/n.”

Complying with his order her eyes slowly peeled open and look where he had told her. There on the floor was the jeans she had brought him when he needed some new ones, every few minutes there was a flash.

“Want to know what that is? It’s you, you was ringing him when we came knocking. You was running and hiding ringing for him whilst he was fucking another woman. Matthews fast forward to the best part”

The footage fast forwarded and she saw Steve sleeping and Natasha climbing out of the bed, going to his jeans and picked up his phone she saw all the missed calls but instead of doing anything she put the phone down on the bedside table and climbed back into the bed.

“She’s not very nice is she? She knew you needed him but she didn’t care, that’s not a good friend is it?” Conrad mocked with a chuckle. “D-do you want a drink of water?”

The change in his tone confused her, one minute he was mocking her then in the next he sounded worried.

“H-here, take slow sips. It’s just water, look I’ll take a sip.” He says “see, it’s okay I promise.”

“W-why are you doing this?”

“I’m helping you. I’m not really the bad guy in this Y/n-“

“Why?”

Just as Conrad was about to respond Matthews ran into the room “they’ve arrived”.

“Ah show time”.

“Where is she?” Steve demanded clutching his shield tighter.

“She’s here, didn’t think you’d find us so soon Cap.” Conrad says from where he was stood, a grin on his lips.

“Where is she?” He repeated.

“Bring her in, nicely I don’t want any more harm coming to her”

The team watch as the door comes open from the left side of the room and Y/n came through it with two Hydra agents by her side.

“Doll-“

“How long.” It wasn’t a question but more of a demand.

“What are you talking about?” Steve questions.

Instead of answering him she turned to the others “did you guys know?”

“Know what?” Tony asks.

“Did you know that Steven was fucking Natasha?”

Both Steve and Nat flinch as she calls them by their full names. Natasha slowly backed up as the team looked at the pair.

“D-Doll whatever they’ve told you is a lie”

“I saw it with my own two eyes. How long”

“Doll-“

“A year.” 

Steve and Natasha spoke at the same time.

“A…year?”

“It was an accident Y/n/n-“

“Don’t call me that Widow. A year isn’t an accident, did the rest of you know?”

All shook their heads at her question.

“Y/n please, it was a mistake I swear! She means nothing to me.”

Before she could respond Natasha spoke up “I meant nothing to you?”

“No. Please Y/n let’s go home, your pregnant baby”

“Not anymore I’m not. I was two months ago but I lost it, I remember ringing you all night begging you to come home but you never answered a single phone call. Probably with her.” She quickly wiped the fallen tear from her eye as she remembers that night.

The night where her happiness had left her all alone on the bathroom floor, panic raising by the second. Ringing her happiness’s father just for him not to answer, blood flowing down her legs and hands that shook something fierce. She begged and begged for them to come back, promising that she’d do better and be the best mum she could possibly be.

Sadly her happiness had gone away.

Numbly she cleaned up the evidence of her failure, placed the baby onesie she had brought as a present to tell Steve that he was going to be a dad - back in the box it came in, she put the positive pregnancy test in the box along with the sonogram and then neatly placed them in another box, pushing it right to the back of her side of the wardrobe.

Over the next two months whenever she was alone she would take the box out and talk to the sonogram, telling the tiny bean that she loved them. She knew she should of told Steve but she had no idea how to bring the conversation up, she couldn’t bare to see his face light up when she said she was pregnant just to see it fade away when she told him that she had failed as a woman and that it was no longer with them.

To her she was protecting him by keeping it away from him.

“But it doesn’t matter now does it? You guys can fuck off now.”

“No no Y/n please we can figure this out-“

“No. There���s no figuring anything out. You betrayed me, you! I didn’t do anything wrong! You don’t love me no more? Break up with me! You wanted to get your dick wet by some bitch that wasn’t me? Break up with me!” Her voice got louder as she went on stepping further towards him, standing in front of him she felt sick at the devastating look in his eyes.

“I asked Conrad to kill me” she smile sadly at him “you guys need to go now-“

“Y/n baby please I’m sorry, I can be bet-“

“Don’t humiliate me even more please, I’ve wanted this for a while now so please just leave”

Steve opens his mouth but shuts it quickly when the agents of Hydra points their guns at him and his team.

Y/n walks back over to Conrad who leads her through the door they came through. The last thing the Avengers hear is the deafening bang they were all familiar with.

In the two years that had passed since he lost Y/n, Steve stayed far away from Natasha. 

The team had only recently begun talking to the pair again, they had lost a friend and to them it was Natasha’s and Steve’s fault.

Steve missed Y/n more than anything, sleep didn’t come easy to him not now not when the memories of his betrayal was always there as a constant reminder. Not when all he remembers is the pure devastation look in her eyes or how her hand glazed over her stomach when she spoke about their baby that they lost - a baby that he did not know anything about.

He had no one to blame other than himself for every time he hears a gunshot he’s transported back to that day he lost everything. Lost his world.

On the other side of the world in a woodland area away from the civilised society sat a lonely small farmhouse, surrounded by a large fence to keep the farm animals inside.

Y/n emerged from the wooden door with a small smile on her face, dressed in her dark blue dungarees that wore a deep green stain on the knees.

She didn’t lie when she said she had asked Conrad to kill her and he had agreed, when they went into the hallway she had fully prepared herself for the bullet to come, to end her life instead the bullet zoomed past her head and lodged itself in the wall.

“I’m not going to kill you Y/n, I-I want to help you leave but you need to stay quiet okay”

“Why are you doing this?”

“I’m not much of a bastard, come on we don’t have long”

Now in the two years since she had left she finally felt at peace, she found herself.

~ banner credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

[glorystark]

His Saviour | Part 1

Steve Rogers x Reader

Summary: You disobey one of Steve's orders in a mission but you don't think about the consequences...

Warnings: (TRIGGER WARNING!) mentions of self harm and suicide, mentions of killing and torturing, pure Angst no happy ending, mentions of injures, dark!Steve Rogers, swearing, minor spoilers of Black Widow, Steve being an asshole in general

Pairing: Steve Rogers x reader

Featuring: The original 6

Disclaimer: please don't read this if you're not comfortable with any of the topics below or/and if they trigger you. This is just a fiction and it's never ok to act like this. I'm not romanticizing any of these topics and this behaviour!

You are sitting in the Quinjet, observing everyone who is injured in different ways. Natasha has been stabbed in her right thigh, Clint’s left ankle has been twisted, and Bruce, although not injured, appears exhausted due to a significant code green call, during which Nat almost lost him trying to retrieve him. Thor has a few scratches on his face. Everyone’s faces show bruising in different areas, and their bodies are still aching. But you, you have been injured the most. Your right wrist is broken, and you have been shot in your left leg, though the bullet wasn’t deep and didn't cause major damage; otherwise, you probably would have passed out by now. You still have trouble breathing, and your voice is sore because one of the HYDRA agents almost choked you to death. Your face is bruised, you can only open your right eye halfway, and your lips are swollen. The numbness has made it so you can barely feel any pain. When everyone saw you upon returning to the jet, they were extremely worried. You didn’t possess inhuman powers and weren't a super soldier, but you used to be a well-trained assassin and spy in the Red Room, closely partnered with Natasha Romanoff before joining S.H.I.E.L.D. So, it was surprising for the team to see you so battered, though they understood the mission was challenging.

Everyone needed a break upon returning to the tower. Initially, everyone thought it was a straightforward mission: infiltrate a high-security HYDRA base, get two flash drives containing vital and dangerous information, and exit. What no one knew was that it was a trap, with far more agents present than expected. Eventually, you managed to escape, but only securing one of the flash drives.

As everyone settled back in the jet, Bruce finished removing the bullet from your leg and bandaging Nat’s thigh. Thor bragged to Tony about his usual lack of injuries on missions, joking that he could have taken down all the HYDRA agents that day if he hadn’t been 'unlucky', which elicited laughter from Tony. Clint checked on Nat while she recounted a memory from Budapest. Meanwhile, you contemplated going home for a long shower until you noticed Steve, whose eyes were fixed on you with intensity. Confused, you assumed he was lost in thought, but you were wrong.

“How could you be so reckless?!" Steve's voice boomed through the jet as he stood up from his seat, his gaze piercing into yours. Everyone stopped what they were doing, surprised by his uncharacteristically loud tone, given his usually calm demeanor, even when upset. You looked at him, uncertain of what to say. You understood why he was angry; you had disobeyed an order. However, if not for your 'disobedience,' you wouldn't have acquired half the information you have now. To you, this seemed like Steve Rogers throwing a typical Captain America tantrum.

“Well, are you going to answer, or are you too stupid to respond to a simple question?" he growled, advancing toward your seat.

“I wasn't being-" you began to mutter, only to be interrupted by Steve.

“Speak up," he demanded, his voice cutting you off. You met his gaze, puzzled by his demeanor.

“I wasn't being reckless; I was being thoughtful. The-" you tried to explain, but Steve interrupted again.

"Thoughtful?! You call that thoughtful?! Really, Y/n? It's clear you don't understand the difference between stupidity and thoughtfulness.” he retorted.

“Will you stop interrupting me?" you interjected, your voice growing louder as you rose from your seat. You locked eyes with Steve, standing almost chest to chest in front of each other.

“I wouldn't have interrupted you if I knew any useful words were going to come out of your mouth," he countered, finally yelling, causing everyone but you to flinch.

“You have no right to yell at me like this, Steve.” you asserted, standing up for yourself.

"I have EVERY right to yell at you, you-" he began, but you cut him off this time.

"Why are you making it seem like I committed a crime? Yes, I agree it was wrong for me to enter that room alone, but I retrieved the flash drive we needed, didn't I?" you challenged.

“That is not the point right now. The point is, I'm your captain, and I gave a strict, direct order not to enter that room, and you disobeyed me.” he stated firmly.

That was all true. When you disobeyed his order, you knew he would be angry, but not to this extent.

You sprinted down the hallway, incapacitating every HYDRA agent in your path. You tried not to use your gun too often, knowing there would likely be guards in the room.

"Steve, I found the room," you said through your earpiece. You subdued the agent guarding the room where the flash drives were, and as the door swung open, more than twenty HYDRA agents stood before you, blocking your view of the drives on the computer table.

“Y/n, what did you just say? Get out of there now! Do you even know how many agents are in there?" Steve's urgent voice echoed in your ear.

“I do now," you replied, still facing the agents, who were also eyeing you cautiously.

"Y/n, this is an order. Get. Out. Of. There. Now.” Steve commanded, his tone almost a shout.

“Sorry, Steve, but people's lives depend on this.” you declared, charging toward the agents, disregarding Steve's pleas for you to retreat.

“Steve, I really don't understand what the big deal is. I got one of the drives, and yes, I went alone, but at least I obtained something that will help us.” you reasoned, taking a seat.

“Alright, y/n, I'm definitely sure now that you are deaf. You entered a room with so many HYDRA agents-" he began, only to be cut off by you.

“They were like 10 and they were really weak-" you defended.

“They were 27 trained assassins!” he corrected, making you widen your eyes.

"And do I need to remind you that your leg has been shot, and you can barely keep your eyes open, not to mention the rest of your injuries." he added mockingly.

“Okay, Steve, I get it, and I'm sorry for being reckless. Can we let this go now?" you pleaded, sitting down.

“Let this go?!" he started laughing, though his laugh lacked any humor. Everyone looked at Steve, unable to believe his behavior. They never expected him to speak to you this way, especially in front of the whole team.

You and Steve had been friends since meeting during the Battle of New York. You had a lot in common and quickly connected. A few months later, at one of Tony's parties, he kissed you, and the following day, he asked you out. It had been six months since then, and Steve treated you like a princess. He called you his savior because you helped him adjust to life after being thawed from the ice. He adored you. You had a few minor disagreements, but they were hardly fights, more like disagreements. You could never stay mad at each other, and now you couldn't believe the man who was laughing at you and humiliating you was the same person.

"Steve, I think that's enough," Nat finally intervened, her voice calm yet firm.

"Is it really? I think baby y/n hasn't learned her lesson yet.” Steve retorted sarcastically.

“Fuck you, Steve. You can't speak to me like that. I'm not a kid. If it wasn't for me, we wouldn't even have that one drive, and god knows how many people could have died. But you can't even realize that because I disobeyed ‘Captain America's orders,' and no one is allowed to disobey America's 'hero.' The only kid between us is you!” you shot back, your voice rising, though not as loud as Steve's had been.

“I'm a kid, y/n? Really? And what are you, a hero? Do you expect me to thank you now? Do you expect all of us to be on our knees thanking you?!" Steve challenged.

“That is not what I said!" you finally snapped.

The tension in the room escalated, and the team grew more uncomfortable by the second.

Steve smirked at your angered state.

“What's the matter, y/n? You seem a little bit defensive. I thought you liked being a hero. You know, because of the guilt, since you started killing and torturing people at the age of 8.”he said, still wearing the hurtful smirk on his face.

The whole team gasped, especially Natasha, whose story paralleled yours. You looked at Steve, unable to believe what he had just said.

“You seem shocked, Agent y/l/n. Oh, and Natasha, don't take this the wrong way. We all make mistakes in our life, but at least after we realize our mistakes, we try to make them up as soon as we can and not run away like a coward.” Steve continued, ignoring your reaction. You and Natasha widened your eyes, understanding what Steve was referring to."Steve..." Nat began, but Steve cut her off.

“I'm not done yet. Some of y'all look confused, well, let me explain it for you," Steve said, addressing the rest of the team.

"Steve, don't." you murmured, your voice weak now. You weren't even sure if anyone heard you, and you were right. No one heard you, but Steve who chose to ignore you.

“Our dear y/n y/l/n was a well-trained assassin back in the years with Natasha Romanoff in a place called the Red Room, which I'm sure you've heard about. Before even Natasha was out of there, Agent y/l/n found a way to leave the Red Room, a way to save every girl, from children to adults, who were mind-controlled into killing, and even worse. But do you know what she did instead?" he turned around the room, looking at everyone as if it was a show. No one said anything; they just kept looking between you and Steve. It was getting harder for you to focus on your breathing.

“Well, in case you haven't guessed yet, she just left everyone who could've been saved, even her best friend who is sitting right here with us.” he said, pointing at Nat.

“And even though she could've killed Dreykov, who was the leader by the way, with her genius plan, she didn't because she was a coward.” he said, emphasizing the word coward.

You've never felt so small and betrayed. You couldn’t believe he was using your awful past against you. When you confided in him, he comforted you, assuring you it wasn't your fault. That you’ve been through a lot and you took the only chance you had to save yourself. And now… now he was a different person.

“Cap that’s enough, it’s not our business what she did in the past. We all did something in some point that we aren’t proud of. She made up for that mistake many times now, since the battle of New York until today’s mission. I’m sure she still feels guilty and you’re just making it worse.” Tony looked at your trembling sight, standing up from his seat and walked towards Steve. The rest of the team nodding along, glad that Tony stood up for you because they were frozen themselves.

“Oh yeah Tony, you’re right I’m sure she feels guilty, don’t you y/l/n?” He looked at you as if you were a kid

Everything about him was hurting you right now. His voice tone that humiliated you in every way, his eyes that sent daggers to your way, his body that was intimidatingly towering yours, his smile which always made you happy and now it was only mocking you. Your throat is dry, your eyes are wet and you feel like your heart is going to come out of your chest in any second. You were hurt and unwell, and everyone could see that, everyone but Steve.

“Agent y/I/n do you feel guilty about your past?" He repeated his sarcastic question.

"I wouldn't worry about that too much since you have a good way to cope with your guilt right?" He continued.

You looked up at him frighteningly, understanding where he was going.

“Steve don't you dare." you whispered, finally being able to say something.

Everyone was confused since they had no idea what you both were talking about.

“you seem scared agent." Steve smirked at you sending shivers down your spine. It hurts so much more that he wasn't even using your name anymore, he felt like a stranger to you.

“SHUT UP!" you had never yelled so loud in your life, the whole jet shook. Everyone flinched but Steve. It seemed like he was waiting for this.

“Come on y/n are you that afraid of everyone knowing how you used to deal with your problems, or do you still do it?"

Everyone was quite once again, something in them wanted to know what Steve was talking about but they also didn't because of the way you reacted.

You looked at him not saying anything but your eyes were begging him to stop. You've never been in such a vulnerable position, especially considering everything you’ve been through.

“oh don't tell me you're gonna cut your wrists open again because you feel guilty you didn't get the second driver."

Everyone froze and widened their eyes, silence filling the jet. No one knew that you used to harm yourself until you started dating Steve, he was the first person to ever know. You felt so comfortable around him that you didn't want to have any untold secrets.

You thought about what if you guys break up but you convinced yourself that even if you guys separate your ways from each other at some point, you're definitely going to stay friends and he's never going to tell your secret to anyone because you believed he was a good man. You trusted him more than yourself and now he proved you all wrong.

You didn't cut anymore, because you found a way to save people. If it wasn't for Nick Fury, making you join the team you'd be long gone by now. But you didn't have a reason anymore, you were happy you had a new family and a new job, everything was perfect for you. Now you felt alone all over again and you didn't even blame Steve, you blamed yourself. You failed.

You started trembling more and started to see black spots. The team walked towards you to see if you were okay. Thor pushed Steve away, "Stay away from her," he warned, before walking to you. You heard Tony and Natasha yelling at Steve, Clint trying to calm them down but looking angry himself, Bruce and Thor asking you if you were alright, but you couldn’t hear anything anymore. It was so loud, but you only heard annoying mumbles. You let out a sob before passing out in the strong arms of the god, the last thing you saw being Steve's worried eyes…

A/N: This was my first (published) fan fiction. I apologise for any writing and/or grammar mistakes considering that English isn’t my first language. Feel free to correct me! If you enjoyed this, please let me know and let me know if you want to be tagged in the upcoming posts! (This fic will make a twist;))

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

On The Hunt: You Broke and I Shattered

Summary- 3.9k Alpha Steve x Little One. You and Steve find where Ulysses is storing his stolen goods; vibranium from Wakanda. Scouting the building, you and Steve separate and Steve struggles with this lone wolf mentality.

Warnings- Steve being upset and lashing out about your relationship with Pan. Reader goes into her heat finally and confronts Steve during it.

A/N- Okay I know it's been a while, LONG WHILE since I have posted these two. Part of me is still apprehensive about your Steve feelings. Be mad and hate him if that is the vibe! I get it, honestly, I do. I can't help but love him as strongly as I always have because I love a broken character that I created. Thank you so much @yenzys-lucky-charm for walking through this and holding my hand with them. For always giving me reassurance to continue this story. You, my dear friend, are a saint for all you do behind the scenes. Dividers made by @firefly-graphics Enjoy, and if you did, please share and reblog. I also love hearing your thoughts and rants about them.

Chapter Seven / Masterlist

It smelled bad. 

The Little Wolf’s nose wrinkled as she scouted the side of the large warehouse. You lost track of Steve after he shifted, the Alpha whisking his muzzle against the Little Wolf’s and then leapt away along the edge of the warehouse. As large as the Alpha was, he was easily able to meld into nothing when he didn’t want to be seen. A skill from many years of hunting. 

The Little Wolf weaved through the large piles of garbage and pallets, using them to keep her hidden from the multitude of cameras outside of the building. The installers had attempted to keep them hidden, but your time working with T’Challa had taught you where to look. 

The Little Wolf was also good at getting by unnoticed, the smaller stature and slinking nature could make her easily pass for a street dog that ran wild. 

The scents assaulting her were so foul and strong. The heavy acidic scent of fear permeates the stone and steel walls, making the Little Wolf’s ears lay flat against her skull, her nose wrinkling in discomfort. 

A scuffle of footsteps caught her attention, sending her into hiding with her radar-sharp ears swiveling towards the footsteps scuttling down the alleyway towards where you were hiding. 

“The shipment’s ready, just need the boss's sign-off.” You heard the man say into a phone and the Little Wolf pricked her ears to catch the last of the conversation. “Yeah, Klaue is expected in a couple days.”

He is not here yet. You mentally sighed, frustrated that there would be a period of waiting around for you and Steve.

<But he will be here soon for us. The Alpha should be coming around any moment, maybe we can get inside.> She was quiet in her movements, easing away from the rambling man whose conversation turned elsewhere, giving them no more vital information. Catching sight of the unlatched door, the Little Wolf paused, glancing around to see that no one was nearby. <Should we wait?> 

We could lose our chance. You urged her, unwilling to wait now that the opportunity of getting inside was just so available to you. 

<The Alpha…> The Little Wolf hesitated, glancing back at the direction Steve should be coming around. 

Will catch up. He can follow our trail and we might lose this entrance if that man comes back to lock this door. This is our chance to see the inside and be prepared for Ulysses. 

She finally relented, using her muzzle to ease the door open further and sneak into the dark interior of the warehouse, a sliver of light the only source into the belly of the beast. 

It was easy remaining out of sight on the main floor, various containers of weapons that all smelled tinged with vibranium littered haphazardly around and in the center of the building were cages, all emptied but you could see that they had been recently used. All providing cover even as a silent snarl flirted across Little One’s muzzle, anger simmering in your chest as well as sadness that you had been too late to save those souls from whomever they were sold too. 

Flashes of your old life, the sales floor clouding your memories while you wandered between them. The fear and pain at being dragged in front of buyers, their hands running all over your naked body and the false promises of giving you a better life if you just bonded with them. 

The vileness of it made the Little Wolf shiver and a soft barely there whine escape. <Never again.> She assured you, the fur along her back bristling in agitation. 

Never again. You agreed with her, calming once more. You escaped, you had known love and safety with your pack and with Steve. Even now with you two separated, you knew Steve still wouldn’t ever allow anyone to use you like that again. 

The Little Wolf eased closer, edging along the last line of containers holding vibranium and weapons, trying to map the building. 

There was a huff nearby and you caught sight of silver fur rows back. Steve found us. The Little Wolf stopped, the tip of her tail wagging in a greeting but the Alpha stalked nearby, his eyes blazing furiously at the Little Wolf. 

She lowered further, feeling the anger roll from him while he slid up next to her, pressing in against her for a moment just to feel her before he silently let his nose wander along the edge of the containers. 

Loud shouts just out of sight called out directions to load pallets onto the truck, making you and the Alpha both freeze for a second. The Alpha turned away and returned to the Little Wolf’s side, rumbling enough so you felt the vibrations rising off him. Not an order from the Alpha but a suggestion that it was time to go. 

You pulled back, leading the way out, and once back outside, no one the wiser, you both bolted away from the warehouse. 

It had been a while since you had returned to the apartment, Steve had been silent most of the time, both of you sketching out the warehouse's interior and tensley comparing notes with one another. But you could feel the tension crackling between you and Steve. All his responses clipped in a tone that you were just not used to from him. 

It was making your Little Wolf uneasy in your mind, pacing back and forth in a skittish way, making you feel like you were about to snap. 

You finally pushed away the notes and sketches of the warehouse, making Steve’s gaze snap to you curiously. “What’s wrong Steve?” 

His brows furrowed together and his mouth thinned with whatever he wanted to say being held back. “Nothing is wrong Y/N. We should contact T’Challa to let him know what we found.” He pulled away, going to grab his phone when you grabbed his forearm to keep him from avoiding the question. Steve stiffened, a shiver going through him and you saw his nostrils flare a bit, dragging in a breath of you. 

“Stop the bullshit Steve, you’re pissed and I don’t know why.” Your Little Wolf yipped anxiously, making you tense up all that much more. 

Clear blue eyes snapped, flaring slightly in a glowing color as the Alpha in him rose to challenge him before he turned to you with a slight bare of his teeth. “You didn’t wait for me Y/N. You charged into that warehouse alone.” 

Your hand dropped from his arm and you immediately snapped back, if you had hackles, they would be raised at the tension finally breaking. “This is what you are pissed about Steve? I was doing the mission. I don’t need your permission to do that.” A snarl emitted from you, daring Steve to bite back. “Not anymore.” 

He rose to the challenge, rounding onto you, his size a sheer force but you held tight, refusing to step back from him. “That’s right Little One, I gave you up and set you free from me.” 

A warning growl escaped you as a bit of tears threatening to well up hearing him. “That you did.”

“You have no regard for your safety, we are supposed to be hunting together and you just go into that building without me and that wasn’t the plan, I don’t care that you went in, but I didn’t know where you were, I just happened to catch your scent in the open door. What if they found you and caught you, what if I couldn’t follow you in?” He pulled away with a yank of his hand through his hair. 

You squared your shoulders, anger making your tone bite in your words. “It’s not your fucking job Steven to keep me safe. Why are you always trying to shield me?” 

“Cause Little One! It still feels like you’re fucking mine, even now while we are unbonded all I feel…” His hand slapped against his chest, where you knew his heart pounded its rhythm. 

“Well that sounds like your problem that you need to figure out. I’m not your Little One.” You tossed out, the pain searing into anger at the Alpha in front of you. “You ‘set me free’ which is utter bullshit, you don’t get to dictate how I work now.” 

It was like whiplash, his brow wrinkling as his sadness seeped through before anger masked his features once again. “Don’t worry, I haven’t forgotten. You remind me, you had moved on right… to him?” 

You knew exactly who he was talking about and that made those tears finally fall, your hand lifting and slapping sharply across Steve’s face hard, enough that his head turned with the impact. 

“How dare you, Steve, Pan was my friend when I was broken. My friend Steve, he was exactly who I needed when I was alone. You did this to us. You and that fucking drive to keep me safe. Newsflash Steve, my whole life I fought and I’m never going to stop. Now I’m doing it alone without you. You just thought of how you hurt me while being collared, it was NOTHING compared to what you did in that hospital room. I lost you that day and had to learn how to live without my mate because he didn’t want me anymore.” 

“Fuck Y/N, I never said I didn’t want you.” Steve’s jaw clenched tightly, but the anger from his features was gone, disbelief crowning his features now. His hand reached out to draw you in, but you stepped away, unable to handle the contact.

“You broke me that day Steve and now you don’t like this version I turned into? You have no right to be mad about that.” Your voice cracked, a shiver wracking up your body while the Little Wolf started singing in the back of your mind, her own pain breaking in the song. “I survived being used, I survived beatings in attempts to make me submissive, I survived other Alpha’s scarring me with their bites, I survived all the times they tried purposely to break me into bowing for them and being this meek little pup. But you, Steve I barely survived you.”  

You let out a breath, feeling your chest lighten as Steve stood before you like he was at a loss for words for a moment. Before you would let him say anything, you turned away to your room and let the door shut him out. Exhaustion hit you like a ton of bricks and as you crawled into your bed to sink into that dark place you yet again were hovering in, your Little Wolf crooning to you, you curled into a ball in your bed and let yourself go. 

Steve sat on the edge of the uncomfortable bed in the apartment. It had been hours since you just dropped it all on him, which he knew but hearing it come from you, how your voice became so vulnerable like you were laid open and left to pick up the pieces. To top it off, he knew he was an utter asshole for what he said to you, wishing he could take it back. But it was out there now and he knew he couldn’t take back what he said in a moment of frustration. 

There was no way to take any of the last year back, he knew he acted on instinct back then and he was wrong. All of it was wrong, but he had to live with his actions. Actions had consequences and all he could do now was live with those choices, and give you that freedom. You were right, he couldn’t be mad at what you turned into because he was a part of it all. Something in him shattered that day, hard broken shards that fed all his fears and he was still struggling to not give in to them.

It still didn’t make it easier for him, or the Alpha. The Alpha was furious with him once more. A snarling beast who lashed out to make Steve wince at the rage. But he felt he deserved it, he took each one without a snap back. 

To top the whole fuck up of a day there was a soft wail through the wall of disbelief and it hit every one of Steve’s senses.

Your heat finally arrived and right now you two were stuck together, with no way to give one another space during this vulnerable intimate time. 

And it was almost torture to Steve as his muscles cramped with restraint, resisting the urge to go to you. 

The Wolf simmered somewhere, Steve sensed him close, but he was still staying away from the conscious side. Your scent was heavy with need and that made a ping of guilt well up in him that your heat was going to be worse for you because he was there. 

If you were back in Wakanda he would slip away, leave you in peace to choose the partner you would want to help you through this. But not in the middle of a mission like this.  

<Coward> The Wolf snarled at him, his ears laid flat against his skull and showing his fangs with a snap of his jaw, jolting Steve back to his awareness of his beast. <You would run away instead of staying to take care of her.> 

His head hung from his shoulders, gritting his eyes and clenching his jaw as his own beast tried to take over, howling your song to call for you. His rut was going to be rough, more of his wolfish side coming through, the overbearing need to fuck and take care of his mate would be a whole other torture. 

“Fuck off.” He snarled loudly, aiming at the Alpha but your soft voice cut through his snarl, making his head snap up, his hair disheveled and eyes flashing a brighter color as his nose tilted up to catch your warm honeysuckle scent. 

“Steve.” Your voice was soft in tone and loud in every other way as it broke his inner battle, your hands clutching at a blanket around you, miserable looking. “She won’t stop…” 

Steve guessed, as much as his wolf was trying to take over, the Little Wolf would be too. You were so distressed-looking, shaking in the blanket even though it wasn’t cold. He straightened up, holding out a hand to you. “Come here Y/N.” He growled, unable to contain more of the Wolf coming through. 

It was all it took, the blanket fell from around you, your body to sensitive for anything on you, as you streaked to Steve, his arms circling around your waist and made you straddle his lap. Getting as close as you could be without pinning you underneath him in the bed. His clothes felt so constricting as you settled in close, tears starting to race down your cheeks while your hands slid up his chest, pulling his shirt over his head so you could get skin to skin, which he was thankful for. “I tried Alpha, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry.” You leaned into him, your breasts pressing against his chest as your face tucked into his neck, hiding away. 

“For what Y/N?” he let his nose press against the back of your neck, inhaling deeply. That alone made the wolf ease back, and let him regain control. Heavy calloused hands went up and down your back as you started sobbing in his neck, your thighs squeezing against him as you rocked your hips slightly to rub against him. 

“For being here with you.” You pushed against him and stared at him with sorrow and pain that Steve couldn’t stop the kisses he flushed over your eyes as more of your tears escaped, tears that he caused. Salty on his lips as they escaped into his beard. His gentleness at the moment, although both of your bodies were screaming to mate with one another, seemed to break you. 

“I’m so mad at you for doing this to me.” You dug your nails into his shoulders, rocking again as he matched your movement, pushing up to give you some relief in your grinding. “I did what you said, I left you alone and you followed me here. I couldn’t escape you with the pack and I still can’t Steve. Why do you make this impossible for me?” You hissed as your mouth sought his, while his kiss stayed gentle, you bit at him, gasping against him as your nails clawed into the muscles of his back. “You left me Steve and it broke me more than anything else that has happened.” If this was your punishment, Steve would take it. Every sharp claw and hissing bite you lashed at him. 

Steve clenched his jaw, unwilling to defend himself and his choices. He did this to you and it was the least he could do was listen. Instead, he pressed you in closer to him, touching you in all the ways he knew made you feel safe and cared for, his lips pressing against yours while you broke because of him. Your pain you lashed onto his back with your nails sharply dragging up to grasp his shoulder and rock yourself in against him once again, he welcomed the pain as he would any of your touches. 

You shook in his hold, pushing away from him enough to look at him, your anger melding into sheer pain. “Was I too weak to be an Alpha’s mate, your mate? Do you regret taking a broken and used Omega? I need to know Steve.”

This he couldn’t stand, not from you of all people. With a sweep of his hold, he twisted you to the bed, on your back while he hovered over you with a bare of his teeth at you, all the long hair falling forward around his face, making Steve look wild above you. Your hands went to cup his face, studying the man you and your little wolf still fiercely loved, your fingers pushing up to weave into his hair. “Is that what you actually believe Little One?” Steve’s tone was graveled, a mix of his voice and the Alpha growling at the same time. “Do you?” He said sharper, making you roll your body up into his solid one, giving a nod when you couldn't say anything. 

His hands caught your wrists and let his nose trace the inside on each one, you went pliant against him finally and he let his whirlwind of emotions settle. He had you and wasn’t planning on letting you go till you knew in your soul that he never would have left you because of those reasons. 

Your hands were pinned swiftly, slamming them into the pillows scattered around his bed. “Little One.” He growled when his lips descended to the soft warmth of your neck column. Kissing behind your ear with much more gentleness than how his hand caged yours over your head. “You really don’t know do you, how much power you have.” His growls were edging on violent, wracking through your body while his touch remained loving, each glide of his hand tracing your side passionate while the other encircled your wrists above your head with controlled strength, the flick of his tongue gliding on your skin and light pressure of sharpened fangs all affection in worshipping you. “How I would do anything for you. You think me walking away didn’t destroy my sanity, made the beast try to claw from his cage?” 

You whined under Steve, your heat simmering on unbearable but his words were making you want to scream. All this time he felt this way and he still managed to walk away, leaving you shattered, your fingers curled, digging into his palm keeping you pinned down. He hissed at the pain but never loosened or pulled away from you. “You still did it, you claim to protect me from you.” 

Steve rose above you, his touch on your waist going to your face, turning your head till you couldn't look away from him. So much filled his gaze locking with yours and your unshed tears of anger, frustration, and pain were mirrored in his. “Because I am weak, scared, and broken. All I could see in that moment was you dead at my feet, that I had destroyed my mate, half of my soul. Alpha’s might seem powerful, but actually, we are empty without our other halves, made to serve our packs but never finding anything beyond that. That day I almost killed mine and I was powerless to stop it." His throat bobbed, swallowing past the emotion that almost seemed to overtake him. "I made a mistake and I see that now Little One, I let fear control me, and look what it did to us. I can’t take it back and will always live with what I did. You are right, I can’t be mad about who you are now because of it, you became stronger. You don’t need me, not really. You, my mate, you have all the power. Fuck, that day I was breaking down thinking I was powerless to control myself...”  His shoulders sagged like admitting this out loud to you took everything out of him. “I should have talked to you about what I was going through instead of running.” 

You eased up the grasp of your fingers digging into his palm, allowing yourself to soften slightly under him. Pulling a hand from his hold, your touch drifted up, sliding around the curve of his neck while you silently counted every little ragged scar circling his throat. Every little barb that dug into him and controlled him. This shattered your Alpha and he was struggling to be better. "I see you Steve." You whispered up at him while letting your thumb wipe under his eyes, clearing away the moisture welling up in those sharp blue eyes.

He reached up to take your palm, curling it against his jaw while he tilted into it, pressing his lips to the center. "I see you too Y/N, I'm so sorry I pushed you away."

Your Little Wolf called out his song again while his eyes scanned over your face, feeling the change in you. Your legs wrapped around his waist, holding him closer. “I could throttle you.” You chirped with a crack in your voice and Steve gave a soft sad chuckle as his head dropped to lean his forehead against yours, giving a little sniffle.

“I know I deserve it.” 

“And what do you want now Steve?” You asked softly, almost a whisper between you two. 

The Alpha was silent, his inhales drawing you in to smother all his other senses, if he could drown in you, he would so happily. “A chance for us, to be the Alpha and your mate you deserve from me.” He pulled away to catch your eyes, such a sharp blue with tinges of yellow melding to give hints of green, the Alpha bleeding through, showing while Steve gave you the answers you sought. “To give you all of me, even the broken parts that need fixing Little One.” 

“If I said I need you to talk to me Steve, you need to let me in instead of just trying to keep me safe from the world.” Your hand twisted in his hold, sliding your fingers through his above your head. “That you won’t shut me out because you are trying to keep me safe.” 

“I will spend my life showing you I can be your partner.” This next kiss was gentle, a brush of his lips to yours as you pulled him back into your hold, his heavy weight on you making you finally feel like you were where you belonged. “And I will wait, as long as you need to be ready for us again, if that is what you want.” 

Ready to be us again… You repeated to yourself, letting his words really take hold. The Little Wolf was a calming presence now, the heat sated enough in just this rebonding moment for you two. You pushed up your hips enough to push against Steve and he instinctively released his hold on you to fall back and take you with him, letting you straddle him while he laid underneath you now, his hands caressing down till they settled on your waist, content to let you decide what you wanted from him next. “I missed you, Steve, we missed you.” 

Your touch slipped up his chest while you moved to settle in against him, ease relaxing through you as his arms slipped around you, hugging you to lay against him and nothing more in the moment. You let your cheek lay against his chest, your head tucked under his bristled chin. You could feel his words as he spoke them out loud. “We were wanderers without our home Little One, we missed you too.” 

[vilentia]

Unshielded Affection

Steve Rogers x reader

In the heart of Stark Tower, amidst the hum of technology and the occasional clank of Iron Man suits, there you were, a new assistant to Tony Stark. Your presence was a breath of fresh air, a contrast to the rigid mechanics and cold steel that surrounded you. And there he was, Steve Rogers – Captain America himself – with eyes that lingered on you a moment too long, a heart ensnared by your grace.

Steve watched you from afar, his admiration a silent sentinel. In his mind, he had already built a world where you were his and his alone – his girlfriend, his wife, the mother of his children. But for now, he was just a man, albeit a superhuman one, hopelessly entangled in the web of his yearning.

"Good morning, Steve," you greeted him one day, your voice a melody that danced through the air. Polite, ever so kind, yet oblivious to the storm you stirred in him.

"Morning," he replied, his voice a rumble, like distant thunder. "You look... nice today."

You offered a smile, unaware of the depth of his obsession, how he craved to claim you as his own. In his eyes, you were perfection – someone who deserved the world, and he wanted to be the one to give it to you.

But Steve's longing was a shadow that followed him, a whisper in the dark corners of Stark Tower. He imagined conversations, moments where he could confess his feelings, but fear held him back. What if you didn't feel the same? What if he was just another face in the crowd to you?

One evening, as the city lights flickered like distant stars, Steve found you alone in the common area, lost in a book. He approached, heart pounding, a battle raging within him.

"Can I sit here?" he asked, indicating the seat beside you.

"Of course," you replied, your eyes meeting his, a galaxy of kindness within them.

They talked, about everything and nothing – about art, about the world, about dreams. And in those moments, Steve saw glimpses of a future he yearned for, a life where you were his.

But as the clock ticked, reality crept in. Steve knew he couldn't keep you in his world of fantasies. He had to act, to speak his truth.

"(Y/N), I need to tell you something," Steve began, his voice laced with a vulnerability rarely shown. "I... I've been thinking about you a lot. More than I should, perhaps."

You looked at him, a hint of surprise in your eyes, but you didn't speak.

"I want you in my life, more than just as a friend. I want you to be mine, in every way that matters," he confessed, his blue eyes burning with a fervor that matched the intensity of his words.

The air hung heavy between them, a moment stretched into eternity. And in that silence, Steve's heart raced, waiting for your response, for the verdict that would either make or break him.

In the stillness of the room, your eyes remained fixed on Steve, absorbing the raw honesty that lay bare before you. The confession echoed in your heart, a turbulent sea stirred by his words.

"Steve, I..." you began, your voice a hesitant whisper, caught between the realms of surprise and an unspoken desire. "I never thought someone like you could... could feel that way about me."

His gaze never wavered, a testament to the sincerity of his feelings. "You're not just someone, (Y/N). You're everything I never knew I was missing. I see a future with you, a hope for something more than just battles and missions. With you, I see a life."

Your heart fluttered, a bird trapped within a ribcage, yearning for the freedom his words promised. A part of you had always harbored feelings for the heroic Captain, feelings you dared not acknowledge until this moment.

Steve reached out, his hand hesitantly finding yours. The contact was electric, a connection that seemed to transcend the physical realm, bridging two hearts with a silent understanding.

"I want to be there for you, to protect you, to love you," Steve continued, his voice a fervent plea. "But I need to know... do you feel the same?"

The question hung in the air, a challenge to the walls you had built around your heart. The thought of being with Steve, of being the center of his world, was both exhilarating and terrifying. To be loved by him meant stepping into a life far removed from the ordinary – a life filled with dangers, uncertainties, but also unparalleled passion.

In his eyes, you saw the reflection of your own fears and hopes, a mirror to your soul. "Steve, I... I do have feelings for you," you confessed, your voice barely above a whisper. "But it's all so overwhelming. You're not just a man; you're a symbol, a hero."

Steve's grip on your hand tightened, a silent reassurance. "I'm just a man when I'm with you, (Y/N). A man who wants nothing more than to make you happy, to be the reason you smile. I don't want to rush you into anything. I just want you to know how I feel."

The room faded around you, the world outside ceasing to exist. It was just you and Steve, two souls laid bare in the vulnerability of the moment. The decision loomed ahead, a crossroads that would define the path of your heart.

In Steve's eyes, you saw a future filled with love, challenges, and the promise of a life less ordinary. And in that moment, you realized that perhaps the greatest adventure was not in the battles fought outside, but in the journey of the heart.

"Steve, I want to be with you," you said, the words a leap of faith into the unknown. "Let's take this one step at a time, together."

And with those words, a new chapter began – a story of love between a hero and the one who had captured his heart, a tale of two souls navigating the unpredictable waters of life, together.

[ynscrazylife]

His Agent

Summary: When the Avengers save a team of kidnapped S.H.I.E.L.D. Agents, they discover something new about their Captain.

A/N: I’ve been working on this fic for a little while and I’m proud of this idea/plot so I really hope you enjoy!

Masterlist

The first clue that something was off was the change in Natasha and Clint’s behavior. They could usually hide it, being master spies, but it became difficult to constantly put on a mask around the people you live with, people you saved the world with. Steve, Tony, Bruce, and Thor all noticed how the pair retreated into themselves like turtles would into their shells. They had always been reserved - Natasha especially - but it went to a deeper level now. They would talk in hushed whispers to each other, were always hunched over something, their backs to the rest of the team, and were distracted when it came to Avengers business. 

The next clue was when Director Fury postponed his meeting with the Avengers. Since establishing the initiative, he had made a point to have monthly meetings with the team to discuss any recent updates, missions and threats. Fury was adamant that these meetings were very crucial to the Avengers’ success, so to hear that he was pushing it back right as they were gathering around the conference table was a surprise. Still, not enough for them to think it might be related to Natasha and Clint’s behavior. Fury said the meeting would be in a few days, that was all. 

Then, things went from being off to being wrong. They all sat at the table, ready to see Fury’s face come up on screen, but he never appeared – Deputy Director Maria Hill did. 

“What happened?” Natasha asked almost immediately, not even letting Maria get a word in as she leaned forward in her chair. It was clear that she knew more than what she was letting on. 

“Director Fury cannot make it today, he’s dealing with a crucial issue, one that we hope we can call on you, Avengers, to help us with,” Hill said, her words flowing calmly, but there was still a spark of urgency, almost desperation, in her eyes. 

“What’s going on?” Steve asked, wearing a puzzled look. If S.H.I.E.L.D. was coming to them for help when they had the best agents around the globe, and the Director was attending to it, they must be in some sort of crisis. 

“A week ago, we lost contact with a six person team that had gone undercover to investigate an uprising organization who’s been trying to create their own superhumans. We received intel that they had been torturing people and creating illegal serums and devices for their superhuman projects. After being unable to contact any of them, we also found that none of their trackers were online,” Hill explained. 

“So you think their cover was blown?” Tony guessed. 

“We do, yes. We had a team scout the building the agents had gone undercover in a few days ago and found no sign of them. We think that they’ve moved them somewhere else,” Hill answered. 

“Who’s missing?” Bruce asked. 

A file flashed onto the screen, a list of names with pictures. Everyone leaned forward in their seats to get a better look, their eyes skimming the document. The sound of wheels rolling back caught their attention as Steve suddenly stood up, spun around on his heels and walked out of the room. The door slammed shut behind him.

“What the hell was that?” Clint asked, utterly confused - like everyone else. 

Hill sighed. “It may have something to do with one of the Agents on the list – Y/L/N. She helped Steve a lot after he came out of the ice, they were good friends,” she said. 

//

One, two. One, two. One, two. One, two. One, two. One, two. One– 

Steve panted as he stared down at the punching bag which clattered to the ground, sweat coating his raised biceps. 

“You know, if you really want to get your frustrations out, you should spar with someone,” a voice floated into his ear and Steve glanced up, only to see you lifting some weights. 

He straightened his arched back, dropping his arms. “Oh, yeah? How do you reckon that?” He asked, curious. 

You smirked. “You’re not the only one who’s broken the bag,” you said, shrugging. “Though, it took me a lot longer without the super strength.” 

Steve raised his eyebrows, wondering what got you so mad, but not commenting on it. Then, he couldn’t help but fix you with a confused gaze. 

“What?” You asked, still smiling at him. 

“You’re not, uh, gawking at me,” he said. 

You chuckled, asking, “Am I supposed to?” Before he could answer, you made a silly, dramatic jaw-dropped, eyes wide face, causing Steve’s laughter to mix with yours. 

“Ever since I woke up, everyone’s kinda been . . . gawking at me. Except for Director Fury, that is,” Steve said. 

“Well, I’ll admit, I kinda gawked at you at first when I heard about you . . . But I saw you one time, in the medbay . . . I don’t know how to explain it, ‘cause you weren’t just Captain America, you know? When I saw you, with all the blankets and the wires and stuff . . . I just thought about a guy who had been something traumatic. I thought about the Steve that your war buddies always described you as,” you said. 

From that day on, you were a light in Steve’s life. You two became fast friends and, at least on Steve’s part, his attraction for you grew exponentially, and you even spent some time with him at the Retreat. After joining the Avengers, he had been so busy that he hadn’t seen you and now . . . Your name was on a list of MIA Agents. 

He paced up and down the hallway outside the conference room, hand tangled in his hair. All logical and rational thoughts jumped out the window as panic seized his body, twisting his heart into a knot. His mind was filled with you: your name, your image, your memory. He couldn’t stop his thoughts from giving him horrible scenes of you being tortured or experimented on by these freaks. Hurt. Kidnapped. Scared.

The only way to get you back was to return to the conference room and face it, so that’s what he did. Thankfully, no one called out his abrupt departure, they were all focussed on Hill’s debrief. She was saying something about how she thought they were close to finding another base of the group’s, where they might have the captured agents, but could use Natasha’s hacking and cyber skills to decode their intel. She readily agreed. 

“Can you guys suit up and meet us at headquarters?” Maria asked, to which they all nodded. She ended the call and the Avengers all spurred into action, splitting up to change into their suits and arm themselves. 

On the way out, Natasha patted Steve’s arm. “We’ll save them,” she assured her friend, but he picked up on what she was really saying: “We’ll find Y/N.” 

// 

Steve realized pretty quickly, as he changed into his suit that if he wanted to get through this without falling apart, he’d have to switch to his Captain mode. He had to think strategically - they were saving a team of agents, not just you (even if you were the most important agent to him). He’d put Natasha, Clint, and Tony on fighting the kidnappers, Bruce would standby with the medical team in case they needed the Hulk, and Steve himself and Thor would recover the hostages. He also assumed they’d have S.H.I.E.L.D. agents to secure the base and to back them up. It was a solid plan, Steve told himself, and it was going to work. It had to work. 

When they got to S.H.I.E.L.D.’s headquarters, Steve relayed this plan to the team. Everyone was on board and now it was a waiting game as S.H.I.E.L.D. agents to crack the location. Steve was about to wear a hole into the floor with all the pacing he was doing, his heart hammering in his chest. Every second that passed felt like a decade. 

After the location was found, it was all a blur. Coordinating with the agents, talking with Hill and Fury, and getting to the base seemed to just all pass by. The moment he woke up was when he was entering the base alongside Thor, the agents and Avengers ahead of them to take care of their enemies.

“I can handle the rescue, Captain. You can focus on your agent,” Thor chimed in as they walked down the hallway, towards the cells they were told the hostages were in. 

Steve paused for a second to look at his friend. “Are-are you sure?” He asked – for once the mighty soldier was taken aback. He wanted nothing more than to devote all his attention to you, but he also knew he had a job to do as an Avenger and a leader. He owed it to all the hostages to give them his best self. 

“He has me, of course he’s sure,” Tony’s voice came from behind them as he approached. Steve could practically hear the snark in his voice (Tony Snark, he should be named, but he’d have to save that quip for another time). “They’ve got it handled up there so don’t worry, Cap.” 

Steve looked from him to Thor, who gave him an encouraging nod. “Okay,” he agreed, emitting an unspoken word of gratitude which both men received. For the first time in a long time, he felt a weight being lifted on his shoulders. For once, he got to abandon Captain America for a second and walk in there as Steve. For you. 

The three Avengers walked down the rest of the hallway and turned, finding a row of cells. Thor and Tony took charge, allowing for Steve to glance through all the cells until he found you. Finding you was what he wanted but the sight he was met with when he actually laid his eyes on you shattered him. The urge to vomit and also send every person responsible for this to hell hit him in one fell swoop. You were sitting, slumped back against a dirty metal pole that your wrists and ankles were chained to. You were still wearing your S.H.I.E.L.D. uniform, though it was dirtied, bloodied, and torn in places. So was your skin, Steve realized. He ached at knowing you went through pain. Your eyes were closed and Steve hoped to God that you were simply sleeping.  

Steve quickly bent to his knees and used his shield to break the chains, the harsh clang rousing you from your sleep. You mumbled something he couldn’t understand and he hushed you softly. “It’s alright, I’m here. It’s Steve, can you open your eyes?” He asked. 

It took you a couple tries, but eventually you got there. “S’ve?” You tried to say, struggling to talk. 

“Yep, it’s me,” he affirmed, feeling a pang at the fact that you could barely even speak. When he had thought about when he’d see you again, this was never in the realm of possibilities. “I’m getting you out of here.” 

True to his word, he hoisted you up in his arms. He had to put you over his shoulder like a Fireman’s carry in case there were any lingering enemies that escaped the team. Being upside down was surely uncomfortable for you, but he wouldn’t risk not being able to defend you. With long strides and quick glances, Steve got you out of there. 

Stepping outside into the world, he slowly lowered you down and maneuvered you into a princess carry, not going fast so as to not dizzy you. In the distance, he could see your other teammates getting loaded onto ambulances, with some of the Avengers assisting. 

“Hey, you with me?” Steve checked in, returning his attention to you. You were definitely out of it, eyes glazed over as you looked at him. You didn’t seem to really get what was going on, but you didn’t look panicked, so you must’ve known you were safe. With him. 

For a second - Steve was taken back. The tired look in your eyes reminded him of the aftermath of the first time the two of you had sparred together. 

“Are you sure you want to spar together, Y/N?” 

“What? You don’t think I can take you? Prepare to have your ass beat, Rogers!” 

With the super soldier serum running through his veins, it was actually you who had your ass beat by the blond man. You had probably known that would happen when you said it, too. Still, Steve needed to train and you were determined not to let his superior strength intimidate you like it had done with the other S.H.I.E.L.D. agents. Afterwards, you had insisted you were fine, but Steve knew that the many rounds you guys went through had exhausted you. He tried to apologize, but you refused to hear it. You knew what the terms were and you agreed to it - he won fair and square. You had fallen asleep on his shoulder that night, much like how you looked like you’d fall asleep in his arms now, and Steve swore in that moment that you were the most precious thing ever. 

“Steve,” you mumbled, blinking slowly at him like a cat. His heart thumped with such force in his chest - oh how he regretted drifting apart from you after he became an Avenger. 

“Hang on a little longer. We’ve gotta get you to S.H.I.E.L.D. medical,” he said, shifting you up a little higher in his arms before heading over to the ambulances. 

“S.H.I.E.L.D.?” You echoed grumpily, eyes half-closed. 

Steve bit back an amused chuckle at the way you scrunched up your nose. Truly like a cat (or a kitten, but he knew you’d raise hell if he called you that). You never much appreciated the medical agents of S.H.I.E.L.D.’s. You knew they meant well, but something about the whole thing made you uneasy. Steve was well aware of that and he thought about it as you walked. The Avengers had a pretty good medical facility . . . Not to mention, the thought of leaving you again and walking away like he had done with the Avengers felt like a knife twisting in his gut. He couldn’t do that. 

“Would you rather recover at the Avengers’ tower? I’m sure I can make the arrangements and I’ll, um, I’ll be around much more,” he offered, his eyes finding you again. He could never look away from you for too long. 

Steve was still a little nervous about this. You had every right to say no, to be mad at him for abandoning you. If you did make the decision to go to S.H.I.E.LD., he’d show up in your room with flowers as much as you’d let him, he decided. 

“Mhm,” you hummed, nestling your head against his bicep and closing your eyes. 

That was like music to his ears. He knew that things between you weren’t 100% back to normal, but this felt better than what he had ever expected. With a newfound purpose and his feelings for you blossoming, he marched towards the other Avengers to tell them about their new addition to the compound. 

[thefallennightmare]

Solace-one shot

Pairings: Steve Rogers x Reader

Words: 3kishh

Warnings: Angst, swearing, fluff.

Summary: When the past comes knocking, will reader give up her perfect, quiet life to be with the one man she vowed never to speak with again?

Authors Note: here is a little something I thought of in my sleep, so I hope you enjoy! Also, I suck at summaries so apologies ha.

The sound of rain slapping against large, glass windows, eased my body and consciousness deeper into sleep. My soft snores echoed in tangent with the rain and I could feel my body sink further into the mattress, the last day falling away around me. It hadn’t been an exciting day, just spent working in the garden and working on my art; the same thing I had done so much of the last handful of years. It may not have been exciting to some but to me, it was my own solace. 

To be honest, the world past the treeline of my back yard scared me, even after all this time. I thought I had adjusted well but every time I went out into public for whatever reason, I was proven wrong. 

I never found myself complaining, however, with everything I had gone through and seen, I ended up retreating to this small cottage in the middle of nowhere Washington, away from civilization that scared me. Washington had no meaning to me, the farther I got away from him the better. I hadn’t seen him in over six years so I knew that I might have been over reacting in how far I tried to get away but I could never be too safe in something like this. 

Even if I hadn't seen him in so long, that didn’t stop the news or rumors of him finding its way to me. I never believed it, though. I knew who he was, truly. This life I had been living, we used to talk about how it would be for the both of us. Building our home together on a large piece of land with either the mountains or a lake in the backyard, somewhere for our kids to grow up in and us to grow old in. 

But with how things ended between us, I opted in creating this future without him. 

My body turned to the other end of the bed, the rain sounding behind me however with the knocking that echoed from the front door drained out the rain. It was a quiet but familiar knock. 

Our knock. 

Three raps against the wood then one solo knock followed by two more. 

My eyes snapped open, the drowsiness from sleep evaporating as I sat up in bed, gazing to the dark hallway outside of my bedroom door. All I could hear now was the rain until the knock sounded once more, this time a bit more persistent. 

“No way,” I muttered while letting my feet guide me towards my front door. 

It couldn’t be him. There was no way he could have found me, I made sure to cover my tracks when I moved out here. 

My eyebrows raised up in confusion when I looked out of the little peep hole, seeing nothing but darkness. 

Maybe I dreamed it?

I turned to head back to bed but when the same knock blasted behind me, I swiftly opened the door only to be met with more darkness. 

“This isn’t funny!,” I yelled. “You’re fucking with the wrong person.” 

The knife I had snatched from the table next to the front door clenched tightly in my hand. 

“Y/N.” 

Out of the darkness emerged the man that had been taking over my dream tonight, only this time he was in front of me, in the flesh, looking very different from the last time I had seen him. 

Long hair slicked back, a thick beard covering his face, and his once patriotic and noticeable suit was now worn down and almost dark, matching the way his eyes looked. 

They used to be so bright, full of life and love. But now, they were almost unrecognizable. 

“St-steve?” I stammered, stumbling away from him. 

A small smile pulled at the corner of his lips. “Hey doll.” 

My head shook, still not believing that he was in front of me. “Wha-what are you-how did you find me-what happened-is that blood?” 

A million questions ran through my mind and I didn’t know which one to ask first

I pointed to a wet spot on his suit, blood seeping through from what I was guessing a wound on his thigh; the large tear in his suit also gave me the answer I was looking for. 

Steve glanced down at it before a sigh fell through his lips. “I’m okay.” 

Our eyes locked and suddenly I felt myself become filled with rage. I hadn't seen Steve in so long that this is how he showed up on my doorstep? In the middle of the night and what looks like fresh off of a fight? 

 “How in the hell did you find me?” 

His lips parted to speak but a red head came bounding up the stairs towards us. The porch light casted over her face and even if I never met her before, I knew exactly who she was. 

“That actually was me. It took me some time, you really took yourself off of the map.” 

I raised a brow at her. “For good reason. You’re with him?” 

She nodded. “Natasha Romanoff.” 

It was my turn to nod, my suspicion of who she was proved right. 

“Y/N, we need your help.” 

Steve reached for me and I snatched my hand away, eyes sliced into him. 

“You disappear on me for years, after everything we had gone through together, and have the fucking balls to show up here asking for a favor?” I seethed. 

“We told him it was a bad idea to come here but he wouldn’t listen.” 

Another figure emerged from the darkness up my steps and I groaned in annoyance. 

“How many people did you bring to my house, Rogers?” I asked. 

“I’m Sam, Sam Wilson.” He nodded an introduction. “I’m sure Steve would be the first to tell you that we wouldn’t be here if we didn’t actually need your help.” 

I took in all three of their appearances and noticed exactly how tired they were. I wasn’t sure what the three of them had gotten themselves into but did know that whatever they were running from was important enough to come here. 

With a hesitant nod, I opened the front door allowing the three bodies to quickly slip inside. Knife still clenched in my hand, I did a quick once over of my wrap around porch to make sure that no one had followed them. Once it was clear, I slipped back inside my house and locked the door behind me. 

“So you're wanted for treason because you guys didn’t sign some kind of accords to stop you from fighting? ” I asked Natasha. 

“It’s complicated, I know. But we really do appreciate you taking us in. We won't be here long, I’m sure.” 

We were sitting at my kitchen island, two cups of coffee placed in front of us, and I glanced over to my living room where Sam and Steve were quietly talking amongst themselves; most likely their next plan. 

Steve had his back to me and in the way his shoulders tensed, whatever they had been running from had kept them on the run for awhile. 

“How long have you guys been on the run?” I asked Natasha, looking back at her. 

Her shoulders dropped. “A long time.” 

“Well, feel free to stay as long as you guys need.” I gave her hand a comforting squeeze. 

The relief that washed over her face was immediately recognizable. “I don’t know what happened between you and Steve but I do know that this was the last place he wanted to hide out.” 

“Yeah, well I’m sure he was thrilled to come here,” I spoke with sarcasm.

Natasha raised a brow. “What exactly happened between the two of you?”  

Clearing my throat, I stood from the counter and motioned behind me. “There’s a guest room down the hall next to the bathroom that I’m sure Natasha will want.” 

She smiled a thanks before nodding. 

“Uh, are you two okay with the couches?” I asked more towards Sam. 

He nodded. “Better than what we’ve been sleeping on.” 

Steve refused to meet my gaze, keeping it trained hard on his boots, so I took it as a sign to retreat back to my room. 

“Help yourself to whatever you’d like. There’s extra towels in the hall closet if you guys want to take a shower.” 

Sam and Natsha said their thanks and without another look towards Steve, I slipped back into my bedroom, the door open ajar. 

Shaky hands ran through my hair as I began pacing my room, sputtering words falling from my lips. 

“Why is he here? I’ve done so well without him,” I muttered to myself. 

I could feel my heart hammer hard in my chest and it echoed loud in my ears when I thought of Steve, sitting in my living room; a sight I never thought I would see. My feet dragged over towards the desk in my room and I pulled out an old leather bound book. It was filled with my own thoughts and some pictures, the specific one I was looking for almost slipping away. 

The edges were frayed and the color was faded but the smiles in the picture were still there, bright as the day it was taking, almost a hundred years ago. 

Steve’s small arms wrapped around my shoulder, pulling me close. My hand squeezing the other man's face, the laughter from that day was still fresh in my mind. 

I traced a finger over the other man's face, a quiet sob echoing through the room. 

“I’m sorry, Bucky.” 

This picture was taken before Steve became the soldier he was now, back when everything was easier. The three of us grew up together since elementary school and Bucky and I became close as we reached highschool. Everyone said we were the perfect couple and I thought so too until I thought I had lost him. 

The night Steve had come to tell me that Bucky was gone was one of the hardest nights I had gone through; the night Steve left me behind was a close second. 

I loved Bucky, still do to this day, and will always love him. 

Guilt pulled at my heart because as much as I loved Bucky, I don’t think I could ever love him more than him. 

Steve. 

With a soft sigh, I placed the book back into the drawer of my desk and slipped underneath the covers of my bed, which had gone cold. I forced my eyes closed, hoping that the past wouldn’t resurface, however no matter how hard I kept them away, they slipped back. Loud, angry voices, bouncing around my head. 

Bucky’s alive but he’s not the same as you remember. You can’t go after him” 

Screw you, Rogers! You can’t keep him from me. 

Doll, I swear it’s not a good time for you to see him. He won’t remember you.” 

Is this part of your plan? Keeping us apart because we’re sleeping together?

With a loud groan, I turned over in bed, facing the doorway, and I found myself wondering what Steve was doing right now. 

I love you, Steve. 

I love you too, Y/N. But I have to do this. It’s the only way to keep you safe. 

Throwing the blankets off of me in an instant, I tugged on a sweater and quietly slipped out of my bedroom and back door, sleep being foreign now. Thankfully I was able to go unnoticed by the voices coming from the living room. 

The cold breeze blew past me, wrapping around my bare ankles, as I sat on the back step, allowing the sounds of the rain to ease my racing mind. 

“You always found the sound of the rain comforting.”

My heart hammered against the cage in my chest as I watched Steve lean against the post, arms crossed over his chest. 

I nodded. “Do you guys need anything?” 

Steve shook his head. “Sam and Natasha are already asleep.” 

“You can't?” I asked. 

“We’ve been on the run so long that my body is used to being on guard,” he confessed. 

I started chipping away at the polish on my fingers, nerves wrecking my body. This was the first time in so long that Steve and I were alone and there was the unsureness of if he had still felt the same. 

I did, there wasn’t any doubt about it. 

“Has he reached out?” Steve asked, treading lightly on the conversation. 

I nodded. “He called me a few weeks ago to check in. He’s doing really well where he’s at. The young girl is helping him get his memories back.” 

It was Steve’s turn to nod. “Shuri, she’s taking good care of him.” 

Silence fell between us and I looked up to the sky, the large moon casting a glow over the skin of my face; Steve’s as well. 

I didn’t want to admit it outloud but he looked absolutely breathtaking, especially with the long hair and beard. 

“Does he know-?” Steve trailed off. 

“About us?” I finally looked into his eyes.

When Steve nodded, I continued with a sigh. “Yeah but if I’m being honest, it’s been so long since Bucky and I were together that the love we shared isn’t the same as it used to be. We both agreed that although we love each other, we both needed to move on.”

He pulled his sweater closer to his chest, the sudden breeze causing us both to shiver. 

“What about me?” 

I was on my feet quickly as I walked back towards my house, not wanting to have this conversation with him. 

“I’m not doing this, Steve,” I informed while walking past him. 

“Doll, please,” He reached for me. 

“Don’t,” I seethed while pulling my hand away. “You lost the right to call me that when you left me behind.” ‘

“I didn’t have a choice, Y/N. It was the only way to keep you safe,” Steve defended. 

“I told you that I loved you that morning and that evening you were gone! If you never loved me all you had to do was say that.” I spat. 

Steve ran a hand over his face with a loud sigh. “I did love you, sweetheart. I did it for you; for us.” 

“You left me behind, Steve! When I needed you the most, you packed up and left! Who does that to someone they love, after everything we have been through!” 

My screams could be heard miles away and there wasn't a doubt in my mind that Sam and Natasha had awoken, probably wondering what Steve and I had been fighting about. 

“I was with you on that plane when you took it into the water, or did you forget?!” 

Steve’s face twisted with sorrow. “I don’t think I’ll ever forget that day, Y/N. I blame myself every day that I allowed you to be on the ship. I thought I could have kept you safe.” 

Tears pooled at the corners of my eyes. “We both went to sleep together that day, in the ice. We both woke up together, seventy years later. But you weren’t the only one that had to adjust!” 

“I know, I should have been there for you,” Steve stepped towards me. 

I stepped back from him. “The second you left, Fury took me under his wing, trained me to be his next assassin, something that I never wanted for my life. You didn’t want it for me either. But I didn’t have a choice. I needed to survive somehow!” 

Steve parted his lips to speak but I continued to rant on, everything I had bottled up all these years finally spewing from my mouth. 

“I was in this new world where nothing made sense so Fury used that to his advantage. I did things I’m not proud of and it gives me nightmares to this day which is why I had to get away. I needed to get far away from that life.” 

“I’m sorry,” Steve apologized. 

It went in one ear and right out the other. 

“Why now? Why did you decide now to come back into my life? I was finally getting over you, settling into a life that wasn’t filled with death or heartbreak. Then you came back, looking like this, and it brought everything back,” I sobbed while motioning to his new look.

Steve inched closer to me. “We needed a safe space and I knew that Fury had some place set up for you where no one can find you.” 

“So you only came to hide out, then what? Plan to make me love you again, fall into my bed, then leave before the sun comes up?” I accused with a hard gaze. 

“That was never going to happen,” He reassured me. “I knew that if I were to come back to you that I would need to do whatever it took to make it up to you.” 

I sucked in my lip. “Do you still love me?” 

The question burned deep in my stomach, spewing out like vomit in wanting to know the answer. 

“Never stopped.” 

Steve didn’t hesitate his answer for a second. 

The dormant butterflies sparked, their wings fluttering in my stomach slightly. 

“Do you still love me?” Steve asked. 

Before, I wanted to avoid this question with every fiber in my being because I never knew how Steve felt so now that I had his answer, I knew what to say. 

“Never stopped.” I repeated his own words. 

We shared a small smile but I held up my hand to stop Steve, who wanted to take a step towards me. Even though we admitted that we still loved one another and no matter how many times he apologized, I don’t think I was ready to forgive Steve. 

Yet. 

My bottom lip trembled as I let out a shaky breath. “You guys don’t have to rush out of here. Stay as long as you need. To be honest, the company will be nice. And maybe we can talk more about our future.” 

“I’d like that,” Steve admitted, his voice breaking. 

Giving Steve a final smile, I made my way back towards my bedroom, silently hoping that I wasn’t going to regret letting him not only into my home but back into my life.

[katgalaxywrites]

Daily Chores || Steve Rogers

Warnings: descriptions of sexual thoughts, fluff, implied smut (if your mind wants to go that direction), and I didn’t really edit this (sorry).

Summary: Steve loves to help you with daily chores, and you definitely aren’t complaining...

Kat Galaxy’s Master List

Ever since Steve and you bought your little cabin, he’s been more than eager to help with all of the crucial daily chores. After all, his strength helped things get done a lot faster. And the view that came with it...

Holy wow.

Steve knew you were more into caring for the animals, feeding and transferring them in and out of the grazing pastures. So, that’s what you started with every morning. To your benefit, the front door of main barn gave you a perfect view of the wood-chopping area located just slightly up the hill. And since Steve’s impressive strength made that task a walk in the park for him, you were more than happy to settle for watching.

You glanced up the hill as Steve chopped firewood for your two wood stoves. With each swing of the ax, he hit the wood perfectly, splitting it exactly in two. God, how his muscles rolled under that fitted shirt. It was almost like he knew you were watching.

After about fifteen minutes of splitting the wood with his ax, Steve tossed the tool aside. Seconds later, he grabbed a piece of wood with both hands, and ripped it in two. 

Umm, what?

You stood there, almost dropping the bucket of feed in your hand, and stared up the slope. You knew your partner was strong, very strong. But, how the hell...?

And holy fuck was it hot. 

You turned away for a second, gathering your composure as you tried cool your whole body down. Every inch of your skin was flushed. However, there was work to do, and you needed to focus.

“You okay, Y/N?” you heard Steve’s voice call from just a few feet away. He was making his way towards you, offering that award winning smile.

“I--uh--yeah. I’m fine,” you fumbled, returning his gesture. Steve nodded, stopping just in front of you. 

“You seem a little distracted, baby. You feeling okay?” He reached out a hand and pressed it onto your cheek. “You’re a little warm.” 

You instantly flinched, leaning back a little. “I’m fine,” you muttered, earning you an even more concerned look from Steve. 

“Yeah?” His head tilted. You sighed, knowing he wasn’t going to let up until you told him.

“I just, uh, I was watching you chop wood.” You pursed your lips and looked away.

Steve stood silent for a moment, then burst into laughter. “You--You were watching me chop wood? That’s what has you all bothered? Why didn’t you just say so, love?” 

You shrugged. “Dunno. Just sounded, well, kind of creepy saying it.” Steve laughed again, then took a step closer, wrapping an arm around your waist.

“You think it’s creepy to stare at the man you agreed to spend your life with? Stare all you want, my love.” He leaned in a pressed a sweet kiss on your forehead. “Hell, now that I know you’re staring, maybe you’ll get a little treat.” He winked before pressing his lips on yours. He was warm and sweet as he skimmed your bottom lip between his teeth. This man.

You gently pulled away and shifted the bucket you still held in your grasp. “As much as I hate to say this, we’ll need to continue this later. There are several animals that are wondering why breakfast is late.” Steve chuckled and nodded.

“Better not keep them waiting, gorgeous,” he agreed. He snuck one more kiss, before leaving you to your chores.

[lovely-geek]

Looking for a Steve Rogers story.

I don’t remember much. Just the ending. Steve and reader are dating. She gets kidnapped by brock. Who then makes Steve choose between saving reader. His living girlfriend or save Peggy coffin. Steve decided to save Peggy’s coffin. (Which has a bomb inside.) And brock teases reader bout how her boyfriend loves Peggy more then her and then proceeds to throw reader of the building.

[sunnysidevans]

Sunshine & Cowboy Hats (3) - S.Rogers

Summary: Now as the summer is in full swing, you are still rebuilding when the bulldozer comes, tearing the rebuild to the ground. You continue to strive for peace with the loveable blue-eyed cowboy at your side.

Pairing: Cowboy!Steve Rogers x SingleMom!Reader

Warnings: (18+), angsty, mostly fluff, steve being the most supportive dude ever, some swear words but not many.

PART I // PART II > LIBRARY

The hospital fell silent. You feel Steve tense beside you as your hand falls to his, giving a reassuring squeeze.

“The one and only” Ransom smirks, the same smirk he’d send your way whenever he got his way. “And who the hell are these people?” Steve steps up then, he knew you could take care of yourself, but he also knew, this man was no one to be messed with.

“Family” Ransom looks him up and down, scoffing at his response. A roll of his blue eyes as they fall back to you. “Where is my daughter?” you roll your eyes, turning back to the doctor at your side.

“Can I see her?” you ask as he nods, leading you back to the room where Vivian waited. “I’m coming too” you turned at that, daggers sent Ransom’s way. “You are not” he scoffs, “like hell I am, I am her father” you shake your head. “I am gonna take care of my daughter and if she wants to see you that is her choice” you snarl.

Following the doctor back to the room, you smile at your daughter's smiling face.

“Momma!” she squeals, arms held out in your direction as you smile. “Hi Baby” you make your way to the side of her bed, sitting to pull her into your arms.

“You okay?” you cup her cheeks, smiling as she nods eagerly. “I’m okay, I-I don’t know what happened” you shake your head, kissing her forehead.

“You are okay, just gotta drink more water when you are outside okay?” she nods, biting her lip, eyes falling to the door and back to yours.

“Can I see Steve..?” she hesitates, as if she’d be scolded for wanting to see her favorite man. “Of course” you smile. Pulling your phone from your back pocket, shooting off a quick text.

Steve feels the vibration in his back pocket, pulling the phone out he can’t help the smile that makes its way on his lips.

He follows the directions you gave him, soon finding the room.

He can hear Vivians giggles from the hall. Pushing the door open with his shoulder he can feel his heart double in size. You are sitting in the bed beside your daughter, holding her to you as she giggles.

“Steve!” her squeal could be heard from miles away.

“Hi sweet girl” he smiles, making his way to her awaiting arms. He sits beside her, wrapping her in his arms as she falls into his chest.

Her small form fit perfectly in his arms. 

He sends you a sympathetic smile, his arms rubbing soothing circles on Vivians back as she lets out a content sigh. “What are you going to do?” he mouths as you shrug, biting your lip.

“I don’t know..” you mouth back. He sits back to let Vivian lay back, her head falling back into his chest as you smile down at the two of them. Soon, the door is pushed open, Ransom’s sinister smirk the first thing you see. “Daddy?!” Vivan gasps, looking up at the door, he grins. “Hi baby” he makes his way in the room, You stand at the end of the bed, arms crossed across your chest.

Hand falling to his chest to stop him from moving any father. “This does break the restraining order, but she is happy to see you, I wont take that from her” you snarl under your breath, watching his eyes as they watch Vivians smile, not only directed at him but Steve. He holds his hands up in surrender, making his way around you.

Sighing, you make your way out of the room, Steve hot on your tails. You pace as the door closes, pacing the fluorescent lit hallway. “Hey” you look up at Steve’s voice, he steps in to stop your pacing. 

You stood in Steve’s arms for what felt like forever, his arms felt like a safe haven you never wanted to escape. The opening of the door startled you as you stood back to your full height, making eye contact with Ransom as he sent a smile and wave to his daughter. His eyes falling to you completely.

A smirk makes it on his face as he tsk’s. “You know, I give you credit I really do” he made his way to stand in front of you, he stood taller than your short stature. “You hid from me for months.. You hid her away from me” he shakes his head, hand on his hip. You can feel Steve tense beside you. “I hid from you for a reason, Ransom '' he shakes his head and a roll of his eyes as he scoffs.

“A reason? There is no reason to keep a girl from her father” you shake your head. “Let me guess, he took on the daddy role?” he points to Steve whose head perks up. “You moved on so quickly from me? So quickly from what we had?” you let out a deep breath through your nose.

“We had a toxic marriage, there was no love in that marriage excerpt for that little girl in there” you point to the door, “she was the only love that came from our marriage ransom” he shakes his head then with a scoff. “We are in love” you roll your eyes. “No Ransom we are not, we are far far from being in love, maybe in the past but far from it now” you feel Steve’s hand on your waist, looking at the man in front of you.

“I think it’s best we take Vivian home” Ransom looked like he could throw daggers at Steve as his jaw clenches. “I will take our daughter home” you shake your head.

“I will take MY daughter home” you push past the two of them and make it in to see Vivian. 

Shutting the bedroom door quietly, falling into the wall beside it quietly as you sigh. The whole car ride home trying to explain why dad was now here and why he nor Steve came home to tuck her in was extremely hard.

Running a hand down your face you push off the wall to make your way downstairs. The quiet knock at the front door makes the hair on the back of your neck stand straight up. Slowly making your way to the door, you open it slowly, two redheads standing side by side with sad smiles and two bottles of wine. You send them both another sad smile, moving aside to show them inside.

“You okay?” Wanda speaks first, her voice soft as you nod slowly. “I am, I can’t let him bother me anymore” you mumble, making your way to the kitchen to grab three wine glasses.

“I can’t believe this even happened” Natasha’s voice is quiet as she opens the bottle of wine beside you. “I do” you shrug, sliding the glass to her to pour them out.

“He’s not one to stop until he gets what he wants, he wants me and Viv” sipping on the glass you look between the two women in your kitchen. “Thank you for coming here” you whisper, holding the glass against your cheek as the two smile. “We love you, I know how hard it was to leave Steve there” Wanda smiles.

The smile that makes its way to your face as the idea of Steve has you blushing at the coo’s from the two women. “Vivan was upset he wasn’t here to tuck her in” you sigh, crossing your arms across your chest. “I’m not happy about it” you admit with a shrug. “He was upset he couldn’t follow you, but he also understands where you were coming from” you nod, biting your lip.

“I feel bad I upset him” you admit, looking between the two of them, tears rimming your lower lash line. “I feel bad this is even happening, to him, to Vivian” you whimper, letting the dam break that you were holding back. You fall into Natasha’s arms as she was the closest to catching you. “Oh love” Wanda is there, arms around you in the most nurturing way.

There in the darkest hours of the night you cried to two women you least expected to have in your life.

The glasses of wine left and long forgotten.

Steve couldn’t help to pace, biting his lip as he fought his mind and heart. He wanted to go to you so badly, he wanted to comfort you as he knew the toll Ransom took on you.

He also knew he had to respect you and your boundaries. “You need to relax” Bucky speaks up from the barn door, looking at him with a shake of his head. Steve jumps, looking back at his best friend. “I can’t relax knowing she’s hurting,” he admits, petting the horse in front of him, who does nothing but huff.

“I know how much her and Vivian have grown on you, I know you want to be there” he nods, looking back at Bucky. “The both of them mean alot to me” he admits, looking back at Captain, who stood with his head in Steve’s hand. “Maybe.. you should head over there, check on her” Steve’s head snaps to his best friend quickly.

“I need to also respect her wishes and leave them be” Bucky shakes his head, looking at the blonde hopeless man. “I think you know that didn’t pertain to you Rogers” he nods slowly. “Go” Bucky speaks again, Steve running to his truck faster than his feet could carry him.

He knew he broke too many laws on his way to the house, he would deal with the consequences another day. He wanted to get to you. Pulling into the long driveway he takes note of the vehicles in the driveway, just hoping he didn’t see Ransoms.

Quickly getting out of the truck he slams the car door, cringing as he makes his way up the steps. He lifts his hand, the door opening before it connects to knock.

“Get in here” Natasha whispers, pulling her best friend into the house.

“Woah woah what’s going on?” Steve pulls the hat off his head, sitting on its spot on the couch, looking between the two red heads. “I think the only thing that can help is you” Wanda speaks first, his brows pulling together as he looks between them. “I put her to bed, she cried for almost an hour” he nods slowly.

“She just needs you” Natasha admits as he nods again, now fully understanding. “I’ll take care of them” he slides the boots off his feet, leaving them by the front door so he does not track the dirt and muck through your home. “I got this” he smiles as they both nod, looking back at him as they make their way to the door, sending him a soft smile.

He makes his way up the stairs slowly, trying to miss the creak in the stairs to avoid waking you and Vivian. He moves to the door, taking a deep breath to prepare, seeing you so vulnerable.

He pushes the door open slowly, peeking around the door to take in your sleeping form. He smiles to himself, shutting the door quietly behind him. Making his way to the bed he sits beside you slowly.

You stir, feeling the bed dip beside you as you roll over, hand falling to his back. “Hey sweet girl” he whispers, hand falling into yours as he intertwines your fingers.

“Steve?” you mumble, voice full of sleep. “It’s me, get some sleep” he kisses your hand, he smiles as he notes the way your lashes fall across your cheeks, you were so peaceful.

“Lay with me” you mumble, pulling on his hand as he soon falls into the covers beside you.

He wraps his arms around you tightly, pulling you into his chest, tucking you under his chin.

You let out a heavy content sigh into the shirt he wore. “How’d you even get here?” you mumble, feeling the rumble of his chest under your head. His large hand was comforting as it made its way up and down your back, “Bucky kinda told me to stop moping around and come check on you”.

You can’t help the smile that makes its way on your lips as you nod. The comfort of his arms around you, you can’t help the sleep to take over you again.

“Go to sleep sweetheart” he runs his hands through your hair, nimble fingernails scratching at your scalp. Steve laid beside you as your breathing mellowed, signaling to him you had fallen asleep.

As he held you to his chest, he knew at that moment he was not gonna let anything happen to you or Vivian. 

— A MONTH LATER

Steve stood beside you, hand in yours as he stood in his nicest button down and nicest pair of pants, the man owned a pair of khakis, surprising you when you saw him pull them on this morning. “You may be seated” you sat beside your lawyer, Steve beside you. You can feel Ransom’s eyes on you, shooting daggers at the man beside you.

Steve realized he was far from being worth the suffering and way past letting him get under his skin. “I would like to start today by saying we will keep this civil, the life of a child in our hands” the judge began, motioning to herself and the jury. “Let’s begin with opening statements” your lawyer stood from her seat, adjusting her jacket.

“Good morning ladies and gentleman” she began, eyes on the jury as they began to hold their pens and notepads, ready for the arguments to begin. “I am representing my client today to protect a sweet innocent little girl” she began pacing, you knew Ransom’s lawyer was just as pissed as ransom to see her walking the courtroom.

She finalized your divorce with ransom, she was ready to fight for Vivian too.

You looked up at the soft comforting smile of your lawyer. “Hey” she whispers, hand on yours as she holds the tissue box out to you. “I know how much of a dick he is to you” she begins, keeping her hand in yours. You nod, wiping your cheeks with the tissues.

“Listen to me, hey, look at me” you look up to meet her eyes, biting your lip. “When you are ready”she whispers, sending you a grin. “I will take him for everything he is worth, especially to protect you and Vivian” you smile at that, nodding with a sniffle.

“I will make sure he never sees you or that little girl again, you can bet on that” you nod again, pulling her into a hug as she hugs you tight.

“I’m sure it is no secret who the man is sitting here today,” she continued, standing in front of the jury. “A man who took his families prized possessions, a man who murdered his grandfather” Ransom’s lawyer stands, “objection!”. Falling back in your seat you sigh.

“Hey” you look over at Steve’s soft whisper, sending you a smile. “We got this” he squeezes your hand, lips to your knuckles in a soft comforting kiss. You nod, sending him another soft smile and another squeeze to his hand, turning back to the judge. “Counselor” you lawyer nods then, “I’m sorry, murder accusation” she corrects herself, sending a smirk and wink your way.

“How would a young five year old be safe with anyone of this act? Someone who can do something so malicious, accusation or not” she nods, she notes the way the jury begins writing in the notebooks. “Nothing further” she buttons her jacket, walking to sit beside back in ehr seat as you send her a grin.

“Counselor” the judge nods to Ransom’s lawyer who stands with a cocky grin. “My client is a good man” he starts, you can’t help the eyeroll, you’re surprised they didn’t roll into your skull. “He has done nothing but care and love for his daughter, as well as her mother” he stands beside the jury then.

“But, she has taken that from him, his daughter” he nods, shoving his hands into his pockets. “After the finalization of the divorce, she packed up and ran, taking his daughter with her” you can’t help the eye roll then. “Taking her states away to hide her from the one person he adored the most, her father” you scoff, covering it with a cough as Steve's hand makes its way to your thigh.

“Don’t play into it” your lawyer’s voice can be heard beside you in a whisper. Ransom’s lawyer continued on, throwing to the jury how you stole his daughter away from him and took away the only person she loved, tearing you apart at the idea of you with another man who was now one of Vivian’s favorite people. 

The judge stood from her seat, gavel slammed down as she sighs. “I’m calling a recess, we will return in fifteen” she makes her way to her chambers as you sigh, head falling to the table.

“We got this in the bag” she rubs your back in soft comforting circles as you nod slowly. “You are doing amazing” Steve speaks, sending your lawyer a warm smile as she nods.

“We’re gonna get him” she agrees, standing from her seat. “Go out and get some fresh air, I’ll see you both in fifteen” you nod against the table as she sends a stern look to Steve as he nods. “C’mon sweet girl” Steve stands, hand on your elbow as he helps you stand, handing falling to yours instinctively.

You follow beside him, hugging his arm as you make it out the doors. “C’mere” you collide with his chest, wrapping around his waist, sighing. “We got this in the bag okay? Just like she said, she’s ready to fight for you and Vivian” you nod against him, standing straighter as his hand stays on your waist.

“I can’t let this man control my life anymore” you sigh, shaking your head as your hands fall on your hips, on top of Steves. “You won't” he admits, kissing your temple as he pulls you back into his chest.

He feels the buzz of his back pocket, looking down at the text with a smile. “Bucky and Nat ask how you are doing” you look up at him as he shows you the text, you can’t help the smile.

“Tell them surviving” you giggle. 

Fifteen minutes flew by as you followed beside your lawyer and Steve back into the courtroom. You take a deep breath as you sit down at the table. This was it. You would have full custody of your daughter, visitation as approved by you.

No more ransom at your neck about anything. Putting you down at the way you look at Steve, the way you looked at him at a time in his life.

The way Vivan had fallen for him as hard as Steve did for her. “Court is now back in session, Judge Reed residing” the woman made her way back to her seat.

“Welcome back” she nods in the direction of both of the lawyers. “I would like to hear closing statements at this time and we will let the jury converse” you nod slowly, looking over at your lawyer who sends a grin in your direction.

“We’ve got this” she stands, making her way to begin winning over the jury. You can see their pens moving quickly, writing and taking everything she says to heart. Your lawyer nods at the jury, “that is all” she makes it back to sit beside you.

Ransom’s lawyer begins, standing as he makes his way to the jury to deliver the final. The hopeful nail in the coffin for this part of your life. 

The jury conversed for hours. They made their way back to their seats in the matter of half an hour. Envelope that held your and Vivian's futures in their hands.

Judge Reed spoke first, “Can the head juror please stand” soon the young woman stood, looking between you and Ransom. You felt Steve tense beside you, his hand falling into yours out of instinct as you watched her open the envelope.

“We rule in favor of Ms.(Y/L/N) of full custody, with visitation upon approval of the appropriate party” you sobbed, falling into Steve’s arms.

You and Vivian were free of her father. Free of the insults, free of the snide comments and dagger he’s sent your lover's way. “You bitch!” Steve stands at the sound of Ransom’s voice. You stand beside him, a smirk on your lips, wiping your cheeks before you turn to him.

“Ransom” you can hear his lawyer mumble to him as he pushes past him to meet your eye. You smirk, looking at him with a raised brow. “Justice is served” you smirk, arms crossed across your chest as she snarls. “You can not take her from me, bitch!” you shake your head, looking at him.

“Looks like I just did Ransom” He lunges then, Steve pushes you behind him as he takes Ransom by his collard shirt. “I suggest you leave, peacefully” Ransom scoffs, pulling himself from Steve’s grasp as he brushes himself off.

“This” he points to you, standing behind Steve, “is far from over” he pushes past everyone then. Pushes the doors open as he makes his way out of the courtroom and your lives.

You grab him by the shirt, pulling him to connect your lips, hands falling to the back of his head to pull him closer. His hands wrap around your waist, he kisses you as if his life depended on it.

One thing about Steve is he cherished these moments where he could kiss you anytime he wanted. The softness of your lips never failed to amaze him, soft and pillowy.

He cupped your cheeks in his soft calloused hands, pulling away to rest his forehead on yours.

“Let’s go get our girl” he whispers, smiling as you nod, hand resting on his as you pull him down to your lips again.

He kissed you breathless every time, it was almost his goal.  “Let’s go get her” the smile on your lips was almost contagious as you walked hand in hand from the courthouse. 

As soon as the truck came into view Vivian knew. She couldn’t wait for you and Steve to get home.

As she went to bed last night, aunt Natasha told her that Steve and mommy would be home by morning. She squealed at the sight of Steve’s truck, running out the front door before Bucky could catch her to put shoes on her feet.

“Daddy!” She screamed, stopping you and Steve in your tracks, he looked at you as you looked at him, eyes meeting bucky’s at the top of the porch steps.

He stopped, crouching to her level to catch the five year old. He catched her with a grunt, hugging her to his chest as she squealed. “Hi darlin” he grins, pulling her to his chest again as she hugs his neck tightly. In that moment you realized.

Steve was more of a father to Vivan than her own father, she looked at him as if he held the world.

He looked at her like she was his world. You followed behind them, your family, as you made your way inside with them.

–

The summer sun was hot, beaming down on you in the tanktop and jean shorts that adorned your body. The hussle of the family pulled you from the potato salad you were mixing.

The sight of Steve and Bucky tossing your daughter in the air, quick to catch her as she laughs, the pool water beneath her to catch her if they didn't. You can’t help the smile to make its way  to your lips, wider than you think possible. “You know” you look back to see Wanda, shooing her own children into the pool with the boys.

“I think you were the best addition to this family” pulling her into you, giving her a side hug you sigh gently.

“This is my family” you mumble more to yourself than her as she nods, giving you a squeeze. “Yes it is”. You follow behind her with food in hand as you watch the kids in the pool.

“Food!” you yell, them all hurling themselves out of the pool at the mention of substance more than the bomb-pop popsicles. Steve picks Vivian up to set her on the deck, climbing out of the pool after her as he wraps her in a towel, drying himself off in the process.

They make their way to you, smiling. “Hi you two” you grin, pulled into the warm chest of your boyfriend. “Hi” he whispers, kissing your lips as if his life depended on it. “Ew” you hear Vivan gag as she walks over to Tommy and Billy. You smirk, pulling the cowboy hat off his head, even with swim trunks, no look was complete until he wore his hat.

You plop it on your head as you shoo him over to the food, giving his ass a slap as he passed by. You were thankful for that damn ad you saw on your way into the state, the stark rodeo.

The damn black cowboy hat that led you to this, standing here with your own family. People who loved you and your daughter unconditionally.

Who knew a cowboy hat could change so much in the span of a few short months.

As your blonde cowboy smiled at you like you held the world, you realized in that moment you were more than thankful for that cowboy hat, and the cowboy who wore it. 

////

a/n: that is it! i honestly loved writing this lil guy and honestly this was something I've never seen in the AU world and I just hope every one loves it as much as I do. :)

[anonymityisfunwriter]

The Heir and The Spare - Part 1: "Familiar and Strange"

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Stark!Reader Summary: Heavy is the head that wears the crown. Heaviest is the head that was always second best.

The Heir and The Spare Chapter List AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Steve Rogers Masterlist

Your nails impatiently thrum against the hard leather of the common room's chairs.

You check your watch again.

23 minutes late. 23 minutes of time and money. 23 minutes he could hold over your head. 23 minutes of power.

Power was all that existed in your relationship with Tony. His constant grabs for power. His need to remind you that you would always be second to him. It was the only language either of you spoke.

Dramatic, but true.

The whole room was so very Tony Stark. Ostentatious. Ultra modern. A nose dive into the future. And not a person in sight. No doubt Tony sent all his precious team mates away. How convenient. Heaven forbid any of them actually meet you.

You have half a mind to leave. You know Tony. This whole waiting game was one big power move to prove that he could summon you and you would appear. You shouldn't have come in the first place.

He didn't have the courtesy to call you, not that you would've answered in the first place. No, he sent Happy to tell you that he needed to speak to you. You weren't invited. You were summoned.

And now, he was making you wait. Just to prove that he could.

You've half convinced yourself to leave when an unfamiliar man stands in the very corner of your peripheral. He meekly waves, clearing his throat, "Um... excuse me, can I help you?"

With a bored, borderline unimpressed look, your eyes flicker up, "No."

He clears his throat again, that polite smile never faltering as he rubs the back of his neck, "Um, well, ma'am, this floor is closed off to the public. We don't allow Stark Industry guests or visitors up here."

You look up at him again with the most polite smile you can muster, "It's fine."

"It's not, ma'am," he insists. "It's a security issue."

You offer another, tighter smile, but patience was never your strong suit. "I'm waiting for Tony. It's fine."

You almost feel bad for your curt tone, it's not this stranger's fault for your terrible mood. It's Tony's.

"Well, the thing is, Tony is well aware of the protocol. It's his building after all."

You snort at the statement. Tony's building. Even if it weren't for the way the building stuck out like a sore thumb on the New York skyline, the Stark name in bright lights, the whole building screams Tony Stark. Stark Tower makes your head hurt as much as Tony Stark himself.

You resent every second you're in the building.

You hate being here as much as Steve Rogers hates you being here.

You tilt your head, quirking an eyebrow at the man, "Do you just take care of imagined security threats or is there something you actually do here?"

Steve quirks an eyebrow back at you, resting his hands on his hips with a bemused smirk, "I never said you were a security threat, a security breach, absolutely."

"And how did you deduce this?"

"A strange, mild mannered yet very attractive woman is sitting in a restricted area of Stark Tower. I, someone who does have authorization approach, and said women tries to distract me -"

"Is it working?"

"What?"

"Am I distracting you? Keeping you from going about your day? What exactly is it about me that you find distracting?"

"Well, you're very - hold on a minute, you just did it again," Steve points out with a wry grin.

"The way I see it, Mr. Rogers-" You stand up out of your chair, heels clicking onto the sleek marble floors of Stark Tower.

"How did you -"

"You have two options." You hold up two fingers, spelling it out for Steve. "You can go and get Tony and let him know that I'm sitting here waiting for him or you can sit here with me until Tony pulls his head out of his ass and waltzes out of his office - just to make sure I'm truly not the security threat you imagine. Your choice."

"Or, third option, I can call security and have you removed," Steve challenges you, a triumphant smirk pulling at the corner of his mouth.

You return the smirk, resting on the arm of the leather couch. "You can certainly try."

He chortles, "Are you always this stubborn?"

"I prefer insistent. And yes, I am." You plant your hands on either side of you, teasingly shrugging your shoulders. "If I'm bothering you so much, why don't you remove me yourself?"

"I would never put my hands on a woman, and I never said you were bothering me, I only said that you're not allowed to be up here."

"I've given you your options. Take your pick."

The elevator dings before Steve can choose either option. Happy steps out of the elevator, looking like his normal frantic self.

Steve sighs in relief as Happy bustles over in your direction, "Happy, can you let security know that there's an unauthorized person in our residential quarters?"

You look over your shoulder at Happy, "Happy, you can let security know they aren't needed. Mr. Rogers is currently having a senior moment."

"Got it," Happy nods, immediately agreeing with you. "Have you -"

"What?" Steve guffaws, "Happy, don't -"

"You're a lot less charming in person," you blithely observe. "Has anyone told you that?"

"Have you talked to Tony yet?" Happy asks you. "Please, tell me he didn't leave you here waiting this whole time."

"Not yet," you scoff, looking down at your watch. 31 minutes late. "He's been more than content to keep me waiting here with Mr. Rogers as my companion."

"I'm not your -"

"Ah, speak of the devil and he shall come," you mutter, rolling your eyes as Tony strolls through the common room as though he's not over 30 minutes late to your meeting. "Brother."

"Sister," Tony coldly greets you from a distance.

"Sister?" Steve squawks. There is no warmth in the greeting. If Steve didn't know any better, he would say that a frost entered the room when Tony did.

"30 minutes late, Anthony," you chastise. "Maybe I should get you a watch for Christmas."

"Really? I thought you were too busy stealing Christmas from Whoville to celebrate," Tony quips.

You purse your lips at Tony, folding your arms expectantly, "To what do I owe the displeasure, Tony?"

"Maybe I've just missed that sparkling personality of yours," Tony sarcastically retorts.

"Jealous that actually I have one?"

"I'm so confused," Steve whispers, mostly to himself.

"Happy, fill in Capsicle, we have some business to attend to," Tony instructs, wasting no time before turning on his heels and heading to the conference room.

"On it. Do I need to call Pepper to mediate?" Happy calls after you. He shakes his head with a furrowed brow like the answer is obvious. He mutters to himself, "Never mind, I know the answer to that."

"What just happened?"

"You just witnessed the eighth wonder of the world, the warm and loving relationship of the Stark siblings." Happy claps a hand over Steve's shoulder, dialing Pepper's number with the other hand. "Consider yourself lucky to have come out unscathed."

"The Stark siblings? Since when are there two of them?"

"Sometime after you went into the ice but before you came out," Happy sarcastically replies. He shakes his head, taking a moment to fix his suit as he looks at Steve with an apologetic glance, "Sorry, their stress becomes my stress and stress is one of their favorite pass times."

"Uh..." Steve awkwardly lilts.

"Look, they aren't exactly on good terms."

"They're siblings," Steve chortles, dissmively rolling his eyes. "All families fight, Happy."

"There's a reason Tony doesn't talk about her. Just like there's a reason that Miss Stark doesn't come here."

"So they got into a fight, they'll make up eventually."

"They got into a fight two decades ago. I wouldn't hold my breath." Happy turns on his heels, pacing back and forth as he dials Pepper's office. "And I strongly suggest that you don't mention that topic to either of them. It's a bit of a touchy subject."

"I'm still confused."

"Tony Stark," Happy begins, dialing Pepper again. "Oldest child of Howard and Maria Stark. And a whopping 12 years younger is the youngest Stark, the second child and first daughter of Howard and Maria Stark. And I feel like I need to say this again because I don't think it sunk in the first time, this should not be brought up to Miss Stark because this is a very sensitive subject."

"Why?"

"Pepper, please pick up the phone. The last time they were left in a room alone, I was plucking shards of glass and splinters from my suit for a week," Happy rambles into the phone. He drops the phone with an aggressively exasperated groan, "As you can probably tell, they don't exactly have the closest or warmest or not hostile sibling bond."

"I'm still confused on the why?"

"I feel like you're not hearing the very sensitive subject of it all."

Steve apologetically winces, "Sorry."

"Let me offer you some advice, whatever you do, whatever superhero compulsions you may have, don't get involved. Not even a little bit. I promise you, nothing good comes from getting between those two."

"Alright, I'm hearing you," Steve acquiesces, raising his hands in defeat. 

"Are you?" Happy questions. "Because I am strongly considering going to find a football helmet before I walk into that room. Let's not add a super soldier to that mix."

"I'm hearing you."

If only he had actually listened.

AnonymityIsFun Masterlist Steve Rogers Masterlist

As always, let me know what you think! Reblogs and comments are always appreciated! 💛

Taglist: @marianita195 @meli18gonzalez@ludicbouquetfromearth@matchat3a@famousbreadcherryblossomsstuff@valoraxx@blue786sworld@buckyandgeraltsupremacy@geminigengar@ansaturn@ecolle@lexhalstead3@ybflkmj@mediocre-daydreams@shanye1112@thegirlnextdoorssister@toomanyfanficsbruh@moonlightreader649@breathtaking-cynthia@mirikusashes@beans-and-toast@niyahcoca@katiechikin@elxvrr@antiheroxsblog@infamouslyclumsy@krissydclayton93@buckysbarne@deadheadwbedhead @qualitygiantshoepsychic@whitexwolfxx310

[imtryingbuck]

Possible Happy Ending

~ gif not mine credit to owner ~

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x fem!Reader, past Steve x fem!Reader

Summary: It’s been three years since Reader left Steve, after bumping into someone she might have the chance of a happy ending.

Word count: 1,156

Warnings: swearing, self-doubting. I’m pretty sure that’s it.

Masterlist

Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3

Three years have been and gone since you finally decided to leave Steve it hasn’t gotten any easier but you’re doing okay. Your mum rang you a few days after you left panicking saying Steve had showed up that you and your stuff had gone. A month after you left Steve and Sharon went public with their relationship, you were devastated so you went to the local shelter and got two kittens why? You’re not entirely sure but you love them both so much.

Four months after you left, you’re walking to the local cafe when suddenly you bump into someone straight away your spluttering apologies when your name is suddenly said. Bucky is standing in front of you with a big smile on his face asking where you have been; how you’ve been. You both head to the cafe to talk and it’s going amazingly well. He tells you he missed seeing you around and that Steve looked for you everywhere. You exchange numbers with him promising not to tell Steve, even though he’s with Sharon now you don’t want him showing up as you just simply can’t deal with that anymore.

In the following weeks and months after meeting Bucky again he becomes your best friend (your only friend too) he comes to the apartment every Friday and even sometimes stays until Sunday. He truly is the sweetest man ever, his favourite thing to do is wind the cats up and getting them hyper just before he leaves. It drives you crazy you complain with a smile on your face as you can’t even imagine to be mad at him not when he has that stupid beautiful smile on his face. 

Now you’re not exactly sure when it started but the feelings for Bucky were starting to get out of hand, you knew yourself it would be so wrong to say anything to him about how you had this butterfly tingling feeling in your stomach which has now turned into pterodactyls trying to break out of your stomach every time he looks at you. It’s wrong. He’s your ex-boyfriends best friend. Plus he’s James Buchanan Barnes he’s not going to like you the only reason why he’s here at your apartment every weekend ordering pizza or Chinese and talking to you about anything and everything for hours is because he feels sorry for you. Idiot.

A year after you left it went public that the it couple known as Steve and Sharon had broken up. From what Bucky told you Steve apparently walked into the apartment he shared with you and caught Sharon cheating with a guy Steve had been suspicious of. According to Buck Steve was crying out your name and begging up at the ceiling for you to come home.

A few days after that Steve was seen with a new woman on his arm. Your sister.

Your heart shattered, ringing your mum she told you that everyone thought it was okay for your sister to date you ex because he was your ex. You hung up and cried. The tears didn’t last long though as Bucky let himself into your apartment and found you in bed crying so he climbed into bed with you and cuddled you. You’re pretty sure you both ended up watching The Big Bang Theory but couldn’t remember as you were too busy watching Bucky laughing and stroking one of the cats.

Your sister and Steve didn’t last two months because every time they had sex it was your name finally spilling from his mouth.

It’s your birthday and the plan was to have a nice hot relaxing bath then order yourself a Chinese and curl up on the couch with the cats and watch your favourite show. Simple and plain. That was until your favourite person knocked on the door with a huge bouquet of your favourite flowers, Chinese food and a bag with ‘happy birthday’ written across it. He tells you that you shouldn’t be spending your birthday on your own, so you point to the cats and with that he lets out that sound that makes your heart flutter. Halfway through the fourth episode of the series he suggested, you notice him looking at you, so you pull a weird face which again makes him let out that sound. You mentally scold your idiotic heart to stop fluttering.

“Y/n I need to tell you something” he speaks so softly and instantly you can tell he’s nervous.

“What’s up Buck” trying to hard not to stumble over three simple words.

“I-um w-well I need y I-I need to tell you s-s-something” he’s struggling and that gets you scared.

“B-Bucky you can tell me anything you know this” God if you’re real please kill me. Now.

Taking a deep breath, he says “iminlovewithyou”

“What? Say that again Buck but slower” did I just hear correctly? No. He didn’t just say that you idiot. Wishful thinking though pal.

“I’m in love with you. I have been since you stitched up my arm even though I heal fast six years ago. W-when he told me you two was dating, I was crushed and I knew it was wrong your was my best friends girlfriend but I couldn’t help it. You’re an angel absolutely perfect. When you broke up with him I was more devastated than him because I knew I wouldn’t get to see you again but then we bumped into each other a-and them feelings was still ther - oh shit Y/N shit I didn’t mean to make you cry im sor-“ he didn’t get to finish that word because you kissed him. 

You kissed him.

Holy shit. 

What do you do?

Do you stop?

Do you continue?

Oh. 

He’s kissing you back.

Took you long enough Bucky, jeez.

After what felt like an eternity you both pulled apart breathless with huge dopey smiles on your faces. 

“Are you sure Bucky? Are you sure that this is how you really feel?” Shut up! Why are you asking?

“Baby I’m in love with you. My heart aches when I’m not with you. You’re the first thing on my mind when I wake up and the last thing when I close my eyes and even then, you just follow me into my dreams” There isn’t any hesitation or hint that this could all be a wind up.

“I’m in love with you too. I know it’s terrible since who your best friend is but I can’t hel-“ this time he cuts you off with his perfect plumb lips on yours. 

Bucky picks you up like you weigh nothing and carries you to bed. He kisses every stretch mark, scar, beauty mark on your entire body as he makes love to you, he tells you how much he loves you. Laying in his arms sweaty and breathless you can’t help it when a few rogue tears slip onto his chest.

Tags: @bruher @cjand10 @themotherof10 @spngingerbread21 @behindmygreyeyes @hnnhbananananana @reguluscrystals

~ banners credit goes to @sweetpeapod ~

[ronearoundblindly]

Big Girls Don't Cry

CEO!Steve Rogers x co-CEO!Reader from It Had To Be You series

prompt from this dirty ask game, and I'll give you a hint--they absolutely do cry, and in this instance, Steve, uh, really likes it.

Summary: It goes against everything his Ma taught him, and his every instinct to protect, but Steve is willing to comfort you in any way you please after a horrible meeting ruins your mood.

Warnings for smuuuuuuuuuut, and we do not waste a single sentence of lead-in. This is a little rougher than usual for these two, and it took an angsty turn, which I guess means I will have to write a makeup for them... MINORS DNI. Kiddos and my delicate flowers, you can find something else to delight you on my Light Masterlist, but not here. WC ~1.1k

"I know, precious, I know," Steve soothes with a rough grip to your shoulder, keeping you from sliding farther across the satin bed sheets as his hips wetly slap your ass. "Let it out, sweetheart."

The arch of your back deepens when you bury your face and sob. He continues to keep his pace steady, just like he promised.

Steve sits up, adjusting his knees until his thrusts visibly shove your jiggling ass higher, and slowly pets that broad hand down your sweaty spine.

"That's it," he whispers.

Peppered in with your tears are grunts of anger. He understands only a little, but after the morning's disaster of a meeting, he'll do anything to make up for his blunder.

You take over and bounce on his length, pumping him with your tight pussy while Steve eagerly watches himself disappear and reemerge shinier with your dripping arousal.

This...shouldn't be the hottest sex you two have ever had. He should feel awful about walking you into a conference room of chauvinists, encouraging you to ignore their snide comments, and whiffing the opportunity to stick it to them.

You did everything he should have, and now he has to grovel in whatever position you demand. He can't question or argue. He can't comment on the how loudly you cry for him to fuck you harder. He can't mention that he found you hiding in your old apartment, curled on the couch, soaking the sleeves of a baggy sweatshirt with your tears. He can't take time to parse how you went from that to jumping in his arms, to ripping off his clothes, to pushing him into the bedroom, and to presenting your bare sex.

Who is he to argue? Steve is but a man in love...

God, it feels like your sucking his soul out of his body though. His face is scalding with desperate embarrassment that he really likes how this afternoon took a turn.

He's not going to last if you keep this up, so his goal changes from glorified fuck-boy to proper boyfriend. Steve can only take so much crying from anything other than pleasure. Your frustration has to be mostly worked out by now, right?

"Come 'ere, precious," he gasps, holding your hips still as he leans to kiss your shoulder. His arm threads beneath you and lifts, pinning your back to his front and stretching both of you to face the headboard.

He painted you that picture which hangs above it. He's noticing it's askew, probably from the repeated smack of your bed upon the wall. Steve resolves to fix that later.

Instead, he keeps his arm locked beneath your breasts, free hand snaking down between your legs and slapping gently. He can feel the strike in his balls.

You yelp, and damn, he is liking this.

He smacks again, softer this time, like a kitten swat for your undivided attention. "Give me a big one," he rumbles, beard scratching at the column of your neck where he licks a stripe. "Please."

The begging never fails to make you whine. Steve knows this, so he keeps pleading for you to come while his slick fingers circle your clit. He can touch the base of his cock in those same strokes, nudging at your sweet spot with pointed ruts from behind.

Shit, he's close.

Your mewls are tinged with sadness, your head falling back against his pec, eyes closed with tears still escaping the corners.

"Hey, hey, look at me, baby."

A slow, heavy gaze locks onto his.

"Fuck those guys. You are everything, precious. Everything."

Steve hopes you can't hear the unhinged crack to his voice as he feels his orgasm wrenching through his gut.

He lowers his lips to yours to mutter "I love you" against them and spanks your mound one last time before he loses control, cum leaking into the condom, threatening to fill to the brim.

The band in your belly snaps, too, tensing your body in his arms, forcing him to hold you up as your legs curl forward and off the mattress.

Steve keeps a slow, steady pace of rubbing again, swallowing your powerful moans in a greedy kiss, letting himself fall back to his heels and come hard with you.

"Beautiful," he praises. "So perfect..."

Your limbs jolt while you ride out the aftershocks, and he moves his hand to press you flush with him, no need for the sharp angle of your spine when he slips out easily now.

But you're still crying when he lowers you to rest on your side. Your body immediately shrinks like it was on the couch.

"Shhh, my good girl," Steve tries. "It's okay. You're alright."

He sees you shiver and scrambles to find the blanket, tucking it around you but not giving you space to hide your face.

He cups your cheek so you can't cover your eyes either, thumb sweeping across the wet streaks left behind, asking if you're ready to talk to him about it, but you shake your head.

"I love you," you do say. "I just hate you a little right now."

Steve frowns.

He shouldn't have given in. He shouldn't have taken the bait. He knew this wouldn't fix anything.

He thought you needed it, though, thought you needed him. He wants to be needed. He thrives on being needed by someone so independent.

Professionally, Steve's always been needed for his products, his poise, his persistence. Personally, he feels like nothing but a burden.

That feeling crossed over today, and he hated himself just a little, too.

He cleans himself up, returns to wipe you gently with a warm cloth, and drapes a fluffy towel over you to layer under the blanket, worried that the overhead fan you insist stays on will give you chills from sweating.

He's not leaving, and he tells you as much before settling to face you on the pillows.

When you don't answer, your eyes open but staring down and away from him, he offers, "I can't go back in time, precious, but I can promise I will never kowtow to men like that ever again."

You huff judgingly.

"I'll believe that when I see it, Rogers."

He'll take it, begrudgingly, but Steve lives to fight another day for your renewed respect. For the moment, all he can do is vow to succeed or die trying.

[Main Masterlist; Dirty Asks Masterlist; Ko-Fi]

[l0velysmut]

family: “why are you just sitting in ur room smiling at ur phone?”

me who’s been reading smut about fictional characters for the past 6 hours:

[sweater-daddiesdumbdork]

On The Hunt: Mending The Remains

Summary- 5.4k Alpha Steve x Little One. You and Steve have started working together once more as a team, trying to meet one another halfway. Steve opens up in a vulnerable way, a first time for him.

Warnings- Steve being emotionally vulnerable.

A/N- It took a long time to get here, but I don't regret any of it. I love the journey we have been on, it was raw and heartbreaking. I appreciate all of you who have continued along with me on this. Special shoutout to @yenzys-lucky-charm for proof reading and encouraging me whenever I was doubting myself. Dividers made by the talented @firefly-graphics. Please reblog and comment if you enjoyed this chapter. It means so much to writers.

Chapter Eight / Masterlist

You woke up expecting to find Steve next to you but the bed was empty. Not cold though, when your palm reached across the mattress it was still warm from where he had been. Your senses drifted, listening all around you. 

It wasn’t quiet by any means. You had quickly learned that apartments were anything but peaceful like the little cabin by the lake. You could hear the endless voices of the building's other occupants. You sighed at the intrusion, but the smell of food coming from your apartment's kitchen had you perking up. 

There Steve was, making breakfast. And you inhaled the arousing scent of him among the smell of eggs, butter, and bacon. 

<Go jump him.> A sniggering voice and you groaned at it, pushing up to a seat and shoving off any blankets that were suddenly suffocating you. 

Chill you horny bitch. You retaliate, leaving the hallway and quietly heading for your bedroom to gather up some clothes. 

The Little Wolf was smug, her tail wagging in a playful manner as you dug through your stuff, getting everything you would need for the day. <We, not just me. It’s the heat.> She stretched and you made a quick retreat to the bathroom, taking a deep inhale. 

Heat or not, we are just starting to get back something. You turn on the shower to cold and climb in, your body tingling with anticipation, urging you to mate, to fuck and reclaim. I’m not ready for that, not yet. You admitted as you leaned into the water, hoping it would start to break the warmth in your body. 

It did no such thing. Instead clear images of past heats assaulted you, images of you and Steve tangled up together in the most primal way. His heavy hand wrapped around your neck to keep you pinned in your nest while he pounded you from behind. “Fill this belly with me Little One.” He would growl loudly while your body jolted into the bed.“Dripping me for days. Everyone will know who keeps you full.” 

“Fuck.” You muttered in a whisper as your body clenched in response, wanting that knot you knew Steve would fill you with. Your hand drifted down, hovering over your belly. “What a sweet smelling cunt for her Alpha.” The sensation of his tongue was very vivid as your fingers slipped between swollen folds, so sensitive that the brush of your fingertips against your clit was an aching need. You swirled against that spot, softly whining as your thighs spread further. 

“Feel so good Little One, fuck I could just stay knotted in you all day.” You heard his moan, the sun filtering in through the open balcony doors, the fresh air a cool breeze coming off the lake relieving your sex-drenched bodies. Steve shuddered above you as he released in you again, his knot stretching you till you were clinging to him, the sensation of pleasure almost overwhelming as you both were exhausted. The cold water of your shower did little to kill the way your body ached now from the memories, your fingers finally fucking into your aching heat while your thumb teased your clit. 

Release would bring a slight relief, but no satisfaction. 

The Alpha knew as soon as you walked in, the large wolf going alert and tense while Steve stood at the stove reheating the food. There was no denying he heard your soft whines and moans through the thin walls, what you were doing to appease your heat. 

Steve had never been so fucking hard in his life but everything in him refused to act on it, not even the Alpha pushed for it like he usually did. It was a solid understanding that nothing would happen until you were ready. 

So for now Steve would do other things for you that were as important, like making sure you had a solid meal. You settled quickly in your seat at the bar, watching as he piled plenty of food on your plate and handed it over. “You always make enough to feed a whole army.” You teased as you pushed your fork into the mountain of eggs and cheese he had on your plate. 

“Sorry.” He shrugged a shoulder, giving a small grin in apology. “Old habits like feeding a whole squad of shifters at home or with Shield is hard to break.” 

“Was that something you did often?” You inquired while digging into your food. Steve settled across from you, taking his time before offering an answer. 

“We took shifts with the Howling Commandos. All the work was shared in our unit, no one too good to do anything. I learned real fast how to make something quick, easy and good.” He took a bite, savoring it for a moment before swallowing. “I would never hear the end of it when I burned something. Being Captain of the unit, they weren’t about to let me get away with anything.” 

You chuckled at the thought of it, waving your fork towards him as you got caught up in the moment. “Hell no, you gotta do everything to tip-top shape Alpha. Including feeding your men.” You took another forkful and smirked as you brought it to your mouth. “And me too.” Then took that cheesy bite of eggs, sighing happily at how something so simple could be that good. 

“I don’t think I have ever let you go hungry Little One.” Steve said incredulously while scooping another forkful of eggs and this time a bite of his toast onto his fork and leaned over the counter towards you, offering the bite from his fork to you. 

“There was that one time…” You teased as you were quick to take his offering, listening to him sputter trying to recall what time that could possibly be. 

<You're gonna drive him mad Y/N.> Your Little Wolf scolded. 

I will make it up to him. You assured her while mimicking what he did for you, leaning over towards him with your own offering, smiling softly at him. “Your unit was lucky to have you, burned food and all.” 

“You have been talking to Bucky, haven’t you.” Steve huffed while taking your offering, the teasing dying down after that while you two continued the last of the meal. You groaned while pushing aside your plate that had scatterings of leftovers that Steve pulled towards him to finish off. 

“I'm stuffed, I can’t eat another bite.” 

“Then I did my job.” Steve rumbled with a smirk of satisfaction while he gathered the last of the dishes off the table and brought them to the sink. “I was thinking about going back in today.” 

You perked up at the change of subject. “To the warehouse.” 

“Yes… we know Ulysses isn’t there, yet. And we can’t do anything till he either is or one of them drops his location. We need to go back inside.” 

Your Little Wolf hummed with anticipation, her ears perked excitedly at the prospect of working together. “So what do you propose? I can easily slip in like before if they don’t know about that door, but you’re so much bigger. Yesterday we got lucky.” 

“We did, so you're going to go in that way, on the ground searching for anything we can use. I will be up high.” 

“Up high?” 

“The roof, I can access it that way. Before I came looking for you, I checked it all out. They have no surveillance up there.” Steve’s glance went over your features, like he was assuring himself before it fell to the bracelet Shuri equipped you with. “That works with the Little Wolf too?” 

“Yeah, it slows us down, but it will cover her chest and throat in the same way it does with me.” Your body tingled, the reminder that your heat was still raging under your skin, itching for you to nest and mate. Your shower tampered it, but not forever. “And I plan on using it.” You noticed Steve sharply inhale, his eyes going pinpoint in interest but nothing more, your pulse raced at the barely there response from him. “What are you thinking? Don’t censor it.” 

The pulse in his neck was picking up, your teeth aching to drag across it to make your Alpha shudder. Stop it Y/N… You snapped at yourself. 

<You know that isn’t going to stop it.> 

Blue eyes burned at you across the table and you braced yourself at the gaze, unsure of what he was going to tell you. “That you're going to be fine Y/N, I know that you're good at this.” Your brows sprung up in surprise, making Steve chuckle softly, his hand reaching over with an open waiting palm for you. “T’Challa had Shuri give Bucky and me access to the recent rescues. Little One, you made me so fucking proud, you pulled so many out that they never would have before.” 

Pride raced through you, making your hand reach out and take his while warmth raced to your face, making the tip of your nose wrinkle at the sensation and a little smile peek through. “Of course he did.” 

Steve squeezed your hand while continuing. “So I know the urge to make you stay is the alpha instinct and yes, it’s still there, I still want to command you to stay here. Especially when I don’t know what we're going into. I don’t have the pack to rely on, no Natasha doing intel, Sam ready to step in, Clint picking off targets, not even Bucky at our six.” 

“That’s a lot when you think of it that way.” You let your thumb stroke over his knuckles.

“Mmh, that's the fears playing all the what if scenarios. Although I can't predict the future, I can confidently say that I trust you to stay safe and pull out if you have to.” 

You nodded assuredly, your tongue darting to moisten your lips, which Steve’s sharp stare didn’t miss. “Anything else? Remember I said I want nothing censored.” 

“Little One…” He started and you flashed him a look. Steve’s moment of resolve crumbled with that look. “How tempting it would be to push you into one of those beds and knot you over and over Little One till you're as full as can be and needing me to stop, leaving you satisfied in your nest.” The growl in his voice was back, making your breath hitch as the Little Wolf ached to present for him. Tremors of excitement raced up your spine. “How are you keeping yourself composed… it's the tether we are hanging onto right now.” 

“Steve-” Your hand tightened in his, and the hint of need escaped from between your lips. “I can’t-” 

“Y/N, hey… '' Steve spoke sharp enough to make your mouth snap closed. “Nothing happens till you tell me too. Till we're both ready for us again.”

“Thank you.” You said earnestly and moved to a stand, tilting your head towards the door. “Shall we get this done Alpha?” 

“Lead the way Omega, This is your mission.” 

Steve crept among the warehouse beams, folding his massive body half over while he tracked the current residents from up above. He had last caught a glimpse of you several minutes ago, steering clear of the sound of voices, knowing that's where he was headed. You weaved among massive crates of cargo, going towards what looked like empty offices, searching for anything that would give them intel. 

Steve often wished for missions to end, not because of how he felt about himself, but because leading others into the possibility of danger took a toll on him. He learned to trust who worked with him though and he fell back onto that, you would call for him if you needed help. It didn’t stop him from constantly checking for you, there was no way he would be able to ever completely turn that off. 

But he was willing to work on it. Taking in a deep calming inhale, he forcibly made himself get further away from you till he was just above the few people remaining in the warehouse. Steve activated a small communications device in his ear, the ping letting him know it connected and Shuri’s voice responded. 

‘You found the base, but no sign of Ulysses?’ 

Steve hummed in confirmation, letting the sounds from below take over what he could have said. The sound of a keyboard on the other end was barely noticeable while Shuri excitedly took down the information provided. 

Fortunately for them, the people were discussing the next pickup point. An excited inhale of breath made Steve grin to himself, Shuri’s excitement infectious. ‘Excellent, I will tell my brother. They won’t be moving any more shifters from that location.” 

“Good.” Steve whispered, mentally taking in all the surroundings of the area, where the best exits were as well as the places that could trap him or you when the time came to collect their target. The conservation shifted to nothing of use, making Steve decide to pull away and go find you. 

‘Good job Alpha.’ Came Shuri’s voice in his ear before he muted it, needing to be able to keep better track of what was going on around him. Your scent was nearby and Steve used that as his lifeline to you, tracking you towards the back of the building where dark offices were lined up. He dropped silently on the balls of his feet and slipped inside the one he sensed you in. In the near dark he could see you whip around with a growl rising from you, only to settle back down once you realized it was him. 

“You're almost done?” Steve softly asked and you held up a small USB drive with a smirk of satisfaction. 

“Yes, I was just taking one more glance over. They don't lock up anything here. Idiots.” you mutter as you slip a file cabinet closed. You slipped Steve the drive, with the brush of your hand, your Little Wolf crooned, making you stiffen as your senses flared. Everything about Steve came in hyperfocus, your heat making your body ache with need once more. 

The edge you had taken off earlier was wearing off. 

Steve noticed it too, his eyes dilating with arousal, your scent filling him in the enclosed space. “Fuck.” He rumbled, his jaw clenching and the muscles fluttering in his cheek. Everything in him made him look like he was about to pounce, but with visible shaking of his body, he stepped back with a warning in the sound of a snarl escaping. “Little One, you gotta get it under control or else-” 

Else what? your alpha would pin you against the file cabinets and take you? Over and over, breeding you till you couldn't stand up anymore? Bend you against the desk with a biting grip to the back of your neck to hold you still while he knotted you? The images plagued you and your Little Wolf, your body waring with your common sense. 

You stepped closer, seeking to cross that line in the sand you drew. 

Sounds interrupted you both, voices passing the offices and Steve grabbed at you to pull you into him, both of you slamming into a wall to keep out of sight of anyone passing. 

Your heart raced in anticipation, crushed against Steve, you sighed in some relief against his chest, feeling him body to body. Your hand reached up, cupping his jaw to have him pry his eyes away from the partially open door to look at you. 

You were aching, your Little Wolf was feeling frantic and all you could imagine was letting go. To let Steve take over, to feel him in all your senses in a way that you didn’t have to struggle anymore. You missed him so much, even as close as he was, it still hurt to have a screaming void between you two. 

Your Little Wolf whined for that connection you both missed desperately, lonely for her Alpha. It’s what broke your resolve, feeling her pain like a physical throb in your chest. “You have until they are gone to kiss me.” Your eyes searched his, so crystal clear even in the dark shadows, there was no missing the flare of yellow melding in his blue orbs. Your lips hovered so close, leaving it up to him to close the distance, to take what you were offering. 

His gaze dropped to your cupid's bow, admiring the curve of your mouth before drawing in a breath and seeking it out. 

His lips felt familiar as they swept against yours, relief singing in your veins at the slight connection your body so desperately ached for. A soft grunt escaped him when your tongue touched against the seam of his lips, inviting more from him. 

A hand went to the back of your neck, squeezing lightly and drawing you in close, his nose tracing against yours a moment when the two of you broke before tilting to see each other out again. 

You gasped when his hand tightened into your hair, dragging your head back to open you more to him, teeth nipping at your lips till your lips parted and he devoured you. A man starved and you encouraged it, your soft whimpers escaping into the kiss. 

Panting against each other when you pull away, your eyes both closed and foreheads leaning together, you reluctantly release your hold on Steve. “Time’s up…” You whisper to him and slip out the door to make your escape, your Alpha close on your heels. 

It was late, the moon slipping through the apartment windows as you made your way back to Steve’s door. After the kiss, your heat once more sated but your yearning for your mate was a vicious cycle. 

Especially when he was keeping himself in check, and respecting your boundaries. Your hand hovered against the thin wooden door, pulling back to your chest in hesitation. It was a battle in your mind and heart, your mind warning you to be careful and your heart making you want to reach for him again. 

You couldn’t even blame it on your heat this time. You just missed Steve. 

Your Little Wolf was an ever-warm presence in your mind, but so quiet when usually her quips plagued you. You’re quiet tonight. 

<I am tired.>  She growled wearily, her tail wrapping over her nose in dismissal of you. <You know what you want and you are the one standing in your way.> 

Your frown deepened and your arms hugged around yourself tighter. So much has happened Little Wolf. You sighed, your fingertips tracing softly against the wood of the door, the barrier between the two of you. He says he is willing to wait, but I’m so stuck on that he left at all and I don’t know how to get past that. Whenever the thought snuck in, wiggled its intrusiveness into your thoughts, all those fears and anger sunk in deep. It had its hooks in you and you didn’t know how to let them go. 

It was like a dark stain you couldn't scrub off. 

<It can’t go back to what it was Y/N. You said so yourself. It’s time you open up to Steve, are you afraid this new version of you he will abandon? Stop being afraid of what could happen.> 

Of course, your Little Wolf could voice exactly what your unsaid fear was. What if we're both holding onto something that doesn’t even work? 

<What if it does? What if he is like us, learning and growing into someone he wasn’t before? Is he worth taking that chance?> Then she withdrew from your consciousness, letting you make the final choice. <Can you forgive him?>

You went to him the night before because your body was breaking, the heat so overwhelming that it made you crazy. Tonight it was just you, you missed curling up with your Alpha in a way far more intimate than sex could give. 

Just being held, just feeling your body meld against his while tucked against each other, sharing pieces of one another while the world stopped being so demanding for a little while. Your hand enclosed around the handle and you pushed the door open, slipping into the darkened bedroom. You sensed Steve in the bed, the shadow of his form shifting slightly to make room for you. 

You eased under the blankets, settling into your side while his arm wrapped around you to tuck you against him, his chest pressing into your back, you felt yourself start to relax into being held. A short tremor of relief was followed by you going completely lax in his hold. Steve shifted behind you, his face tucking in against your neck and his deep inhale had his chest pressing into you, his sigh one matching just how you were feeling too. 

Like you were home. 

It jolted you awake, the feeling of an arm crushing around your chest, the air being squeezed from your body, leaving you gasping. What the- 

Your Little Wolf was yipping <Wake him up Y/N.> 

Behind you could hear a sob escape, Steve’s body crushing against yours. You had to wriggle, and turn enough to ease from his hold. Somehow he was still asleep, whatever dream was plaguing him making his features twist in pain. 

Steve managed to roll onto his back, a gasp escaping him. In a split second, you followed him, perching on his stomach as your hands cupped his face. “Steve, baby wake up.” You called him. Your Little Wolf whined anxiously while you both watched his eyelids twitch frantically and then jolt open, his eyes unfocused as they rolled around the room searching. Then they fell on you and you felt the multitude of emotions in them.  

They glimmered with tears caught in his lashes, his gasps making his chest heave underneath you. Your hands were cupping his red cheeks, tear-stained while he was stuck in his nightmare. “Hey, you’re okay Steve, it’s all okay.” 

“Little One?” He croaked out, his eyes blinking rapidly as he seemed to take in his surroundings. The snarl that rolled from him sounded painfilled, making you push up off him to see if he was injured anywhere. 

Hands quickly grasped your waist and pulled you back firmly onto him. “Don’t… just stay, please.” His fingers were digging into you, sure they would mark you, but you didn’t make another move. Instead, you let your hands slide against him, letting him feel your touch on his face, swiping along his neck and his shoulders. 

Anything you could do to calm his racing heart in his chest and ease the tension riddling him, your brow furrowed with wonder at what had him having that haunted look in his eyes as he seemed to study you just as hard. His hands finally loosened enough to not hold you so tightly, instead, he traced your curves, dipping along your waist and up your back to squeeze the back of your neck assuredly while fingertips fluttered over your pulse. 

Your Little Wolf chirped at the touch, making your eyes flutter for a moment before they sharpened with concern. “Are you okay Alpha?” 

He gave a slight nod, inhaling sharply for a moment to clear out the last of his nightmare. You shifted down, alarm flaring in his features till he realized you were lying against his chest, letting him feel all of you against him. “What were you dreaming about Steve?” 

It was quiet for several moments, your head laid against his chest so you could hear his heartbeat against his chest, the whoosh of his breathing going back to steady assuring to your Little Wolf.

You debated on pushing for an answer, in the past you wouldn’t have insisted. The times you found him unsettled, waking up to find him out on the back cabin deck inhaling a cigarette, the only times you ever saw him smoke, you waited for him to return to bed. But maybe you needed to insist on him to share, be Steve’s safe place like he had tried to be for you when you were bonded with him. 

His hand smoothed up under your nightshirt, palm soothing against your back when you tipped your head up, the tip of your nose tracing up his neck. “Let me in.” 

“Do you remember any of when Pierce shot you with the dart?” Steve’s finally started, his arm circling your waist. 

“I remember my wolf disappearing and the pain, but that's it.” 

“I lost it, when you went down, I went feral. The Alpha wouldn't let anyone come near us till Bucky challenged him. All I could think was that I lost you.” 

You stiffened a bit when a croon from your Little Wolf reminded you to just listen to him. 

“It was like when Bucky was taken all over again, I failed to keep him safe with the Howling Commandos.” He rumbled underneath you. It took everything in you to resist correcting him, that this was life and he was just a man, there was only so much he could do. “I already know what you’re gonna say Little One.” His tone muffled in your hair, his face pressing in against your head for a moment, like it was reassuring him. 

“Not a peep from me Alpha, keep going.” The Little Wolf was waves of warmth in you, which you hoped passed to Steve in some way. “It must have been hard losing Bucky?” 

“God I blamed myself, hunted for him for months. They had him in that facility dragging him for information, testing him. If I had just been paying better attention…” 

“You got him back though.” You insisted, making Steve give a humorless chuckle. 

“I did, but he had already changed. They twisted his wolf till he broke, his limp is now permanent, and his mind was like a minefield. You saw him in Wakanda, so reactive to everything.” 

You hummed to acknowledge him, remembering Bucky’s nightmares taking over. You knew where this was going, Steve took everything that happened to his loved ones so personally, mixed with his alpha tendencies, it was enough to drive anyone a little crazy. “He trusted me and I failed him.” 

You trusted me, and I failed you. Your mind filled in what he wasn’t saying out loud. You kept quiet still, trusting your Little Wolf when she told you to just let him talk. “Then there's you.” You felt his lips against the crown of your head and his hold tightened, not that you could get any closer at the moment. “The half my Alpha sings for every day. What happened, Little One, I’m sorry that I wasn’t seeing you as you asked me to and I closed you out, that I broke-” 

Here you stirred, pushing back up till your elbows were tucked under you to give you leverage to look down at Steve.

You knew he was trying. He had kept so much bottled in, trying to be a perfect alpha for everyone who depended on him, strong and always in control. You knew he wouldn’t forgive himself for how everything happened, they would plague him like they are doing now. Part of you was mad at yourself for not pushing Steve to open up to you when he claimed you as his. 

He was never going to forgive himself, he would carry this till the end of his time, no matter how many times you could try telling him that you never blamed him for what happened to you. It hurts your heart to think of a whole lifetime of him punishing himself, even after working on meeting your needs. 

Pierce shooting you, Brock collaring Steve and turning him into a weapon, then him breaking up with you because he was scared of the control he lost, not to mention all the stuff with Bucky that you were just finding out about. How much of that did he still hold himself to blame?

Can you forgive him? Your Little Wolf’s earlier words echoed back at you. 

The alpha wasn’t perfect, but he was a good man. 

Your hands went to cover his mouth from saying anything more, his brows furrowing over his gaze, his eyes were raw to look into. He hid nothing in his blue orbs. When you were sure he wouldn’t keep going, you let your hand slide to his cheek, cupping it. Your fingers gently scratched through the beard covering his cheek, affectionate in your touch. Your Little Wolf crooned soothingly in your mind, making you smile softly at her actions. 

You could give him something he couldn’t give himself. “I forgive you, Steve.” 

You felt him try to turn his face away, hide his gaze from you, but you tightened your hold on him. His breathing picked up, his chest raising with his sharp inhales. “I don’t-” 

“Steve, look at me,” you commanded and he instinctively stopped struggling to do as you asked. “I forgive you.” You repeated firmly. He took a shuddering breath, releasing some of the tension he was holding onto. “I forgive you.” You repeated while your fingers traced along the top of his cheek and your thumb gathered at the tears building in his lashes. You felt him breaking slowly piece by piece under you. “I forgive you, Steve.” You repeated one last time with your shaky sigh. 

There was a relief in your chest that washed over you. You had been holding onto so much anger and pain. It wasn’t completely gone, but saying it out loud to him helped both of you. He started shaking under you, everything bubbling up to the surface that he kept down for so long. You saw his sob get swallowed, his throat working to keep himself contained. 

This had moved on beyond his nightmare, this was years of self-inflicted pain you were seeing bleed through, holding himself accountable for so much that was out of his control. “It’s okay Steve to not be okay. I am not going anywhere.” 

His arms tightened, hugging you to him as finally, he broke in a way you had never seen him before. You wrapped around him the best you could, sure to hold him just as tightly back. 

Steve stared at himself in the mirror, feeling the after effects of his late night wake up. His head throbbed and his eyes ached, the hot shower you insisted on him taking when he held a palm to his temple had helped a little.

Even feeling like shit, he felt better. Opening up to you lifted a weight he didn't know he had been carrying all this time.

His Alpha was a calmer presence in his mind, no longer a snapping and aggravated force that he had to contend with. Now the beast was calmer, occasionally scenting for where his Little One was in the apartment. 

You weren’t far, just beyond the door. Steve could see you still in his bed wrapped up in the blankets. Part of him was still shocked you stayed after he broke down, all of him was grateful that you did. 

<Our Little One doesn't think we’re weak.> The ever-sensible Alpha picked up on some of his thoughts. 

Steve inhaled sharply to clear his mind. It was certainly a lot to dump on her at once. I’ve never done that before. Not to her.

<She made it safe enough for it to happen.> The Alpha’s tail thumped once in approval. <Alanna would have murdered us in our sleep if she had seen it.> Steve shuddered at the thought of his ex seeing him like that. The Alpha snarled at the memory of it. <Our Little One isn’t a power-hungry bitch who will sell us out.> 

From the other room, a phone rang and Steve heard you answer it with a groggy ‘Yeah?’ He took one last glance at himself in the mirror and pushed away from the counter to go back into the bedroom. You seemed to be getting invested in the phone call, giving a glance at him and an immediate smile his way made Steve feel further at ease. “We got this.” You hung up the phone and pushed the blankets away. “So Steve, how do you feel about actually saving some people today?”

[moonxnite]

y’all ever fantasize about a fictional character a little too hard to the point you’re convinced you should be admitted to a mental hospital?