#still been restorative compared to weekends where I had no plans but had to do school work

[artificial-condition]

Such a good day. Got to sleep in then leisurely ate breakfast, cleaned up some. Gave myself a manicure (been wanting to do that for months) and then played a video game with my sister for a couple hours. After that I made some bread and jam and finished up the food for dinner for Mother’s Day. Everyone really enjoyed the food and I got to give my mom her gift I’ve had for a while (one of those cups with a strainer and lid for loose leaf tea). Packed my lunch for tomorrow and I’m feeling relaxed on a Sunday night for the first time in months :)

[redhillconfetti]

Blog post 03-02-2023 - Sickness

When you decide to run a small business, the freedom it gives you to run your own schedule is always a huge draw when compared to being an employee of someone else’s business, however whilst things look great all the perks of self employment and flexible schedules can mean for a while you are looking through rose tinted glasses, but with all planning for fun and good things, you also need to plan for the bad and boring.

When I first quit my corporate job to go self employed full time, I had to look at my outgoing expenses each month, with the first being my pension. I had to reduce my monthly payment, but over time I've increased this gradually. This is something I was able to plan for and incorporate into each year’s projections. I also decided to pull off 20% of each week's earnings and just store them in an instant access savings account. It barely makes any interest, but my initial idea for this was to be a pot of instant money should I have any large expenses.

What this actually meant is I had a backup for when I was too sick to work. 

If the last three years has taught us anything, it's that a bad virus or illness can appear out of nowhere and throw everything on its head with regards to running a business. You can’t predict when you will be ill, and it can always come at the most inconvenient time. Unfortunately that’s what happened to me this week.

We’re now at the first few days of February, but since the start of January I had been feeling run down and had a slight tickle of a cough. As January is always a quiet month I have been able to reduce my working hours in order to get some rest and hopefully let my body restore itself. However, after a very busy two days last weekend, this Monday that cough rapidly deteriorated. I had a dry cough that would empty my lungs at any given point, every single bone and joint in my body ached beyond belief, migraine, nausea, elevated temperature, photosensitivity to light and also noise. I had definitely developed something far more severe than just a simple tickly cough. After testing for Covid and that thankfully coming up negative, a call to the NHS 111 service determined it was likely to be the RSV virus, something that has been prevalent in our area for the last few weeks.

I had little choice but to take the week ‘off’. I’m thankful my husband was able to arrange to work from home and thus take our son to and from school, and for the better part of the week I've been able to do little more than sip water whilst wrapped in a blanket and binge watch Criminal Minds on Disney+. What hasn’t helped my recovery is the lack of medicated cold & flu medications that pharmacies locally haven’t been able to source, but that lack of supply is more down to Brexit. But this isn’t a Brexit blog post so we’ll touch on that in the future.

With having a week off, I had to decide whether or not to shut the shops or not. In the end I decided to keep them on, and just allow the natural flow of orders to come in. I completely ignored social media this week, the admin has piled up, no new listing or manufacturing. Instead I packed what orders did come in then left them for 24 hours after sanitising them. If 2020 taught us anything, it's how to protect others and stop the spread of any viruses. After 24 hours and full sanitisation, my husband took the parcels to their drop off points meaning i didn’t have to leave the house.

Through all this I was thankful that I had that small reserve in savings. I could take my time this week to just get better without having the added pressure and worry that I still had to bring in a full week’s wage. My pension payment was able to be covered and this week’s bills have been paid.

Here in the UK if you are employed by a company, most of the time they will offer a certain amount of sick days where you get paid full pay, or a high percentage of full pay (in the past it’s usually been 12 days at companies i’ve worked for). After that the company can draw from the government what’s called SSP - statutory sick pay - which is just under £100 per week, payable for up to 28 weeks. It is only applicable if you are employed by a company. You cannot claim this if you are self employed.

I’m sorry if this week’s blog post is a little disjointed, i’m still in a bit of a fog of flu meds and lack of sleep, but hopefully next weeks post will be something a little more upbeat and fluffy!

Simone

x

[violettelueur]

— JUJUTSU KAISEN EPISODE NINE || SMALL FLY AND REVERSE RETRIBUTION

↳ featuring : gojo satoru + ieiri shoko (mentions of fushiguro megumi + kugisaki nobara + zenin maki + nanami kento) from jujutsu kaisen

↳ warnings : mention of corpse + mention of blood + EXTREME grammar issues

↳ form : story

↳ published : 09 march

↳ pronouns : she/her

↳ word count : 2.4k

↳ synopsis : within the jujutsu world, there were three famous clans to be aware of, the Kamo clan, Zenin clan and the Gojo clan. However, unknown to many sorcerers there was one last family that was known to be apart of the three, only for them to disappear after the golden era leading some to speculate that they had died in battle after the sealing of ryomen sukuna, but....

↳ previous episode : boredom

↳ next episode : idle transfiguration 

↳ barista’s notes : hi there everyone! right now i know i haven’t been the most active i have been but i really thankful on how patient you all are ʕ •ᴥ•ʔゝ☆ once again, thank you all for the birthday messages you have given me and the love that you all have for Y/N, i’m really glad that you love her character ╲ʕ·ᴥ·　╲ʔ i hope you enjoy today’s episode even though it isn’t that interesting at all to be honest...

BEFORE READING, I NEED YOU TO BE AWARE OF THIS:

1. the whole story belongs to Gege Akutami and the credits go to them and them only.

2. the spell curses used belong to Tite Kubo due to them being the ‘Kidos’ being used on the manga and anime ‘Bleach’ - but none is mentioned in this chapter.

2.5 for the ‘cursed spells’/kidos (bleach) i will link this video here and tell you the time stamp to check out what i am intending to show - remember i add a few twist here and there by adding the katana to link with Y/N’s cursed technique

no cursed spells used this episode..

3. if you are confused on anything, please don’t hesitate to message me since i know this whole thing is so confusing.

“At this point, I’m not going to get any sleep if I keep doing this,” you mumbled quietly to yourself, as you leisurely walked down the stone steps that lead to the familiar track field you had been going to for the past few weeks for training due to the up and coming Kyoto Sister-School Goodwill Event.

Currently, there was nothing more than a few mild wind breezes as well as the brightness from the moon keeping you company as you decided to come out of your room for the night - how many times have you done this? You wouldn’t even know the answer yourself, you just let yourself go outside to get some fresh air.

Finally reaching to the bottom of the steps, you casually made your way to the tree you always sat under during training with your classmates and second-year upper-classmen before taking off your black longline coat to place it on the ground like a cover as you processed to sit before laying right on top of it leading your view to change from the field to the sky that was slightly shielding by the branch and leaves from the trees.

“What...am I even doing here?” you questioned yourself while raising your arm slightly above your face as you stared at your hand absently like the answer you were looking for was at the back of your hand.

From what you have learnt at being at Jujutsu Tech for some time, you learnt that everyone had a purpose of being at the institution that you were currently residing in now. 

Everyone you have met and knew here at this moment in time had a purpose or a goal of being a jujutsu sorcerer.

What about you?

Fushiguro thought the world was unfair and the reasoning behind his reasoning of becoming a sorcerer was to be a tool within a system that ensured kind people were given more chances in living. However, unlike you, you weren’t really fond of his reasoning at all. 

What happens if those ‘good’ people you saved become the criminal you refused to save? What happens if those ‘good’ people you deemed ‘good’ become the most immoral and sinful person you ever encountered? What happens if those ‘good’ people you save that smiled at your actions for them lead that smile to fade?

Like you mentioned, you weren’t fond of his reasoning at all. There were too many risks.

Kugisaki's reasoning was humorous as she wanted to move out of the countryside without any worries of financial issues but you knew somewhere in your heart that there was another reason she wasn’t telling you when you asked her during your usual weekend shopping trip with her. On the other hand, you admired her in some way, she was the personification of not needing to choose between strength and beauty.

However, that wasn’t the answer you weren’t looking for at all.

Zenin (Maki) wanted to escape the ties of the Zenin clan due to her situation of not being able to possess any kind of cursed energy compared to the averaged sorcerer, yet with the heavenly restriction that was traded with the lack of cursed energy, she processed superhuman physical prowess that was more powerful than most sorcerers you come to know. 

Her reasoning? To become the head of the Zenin clan to irritate the other members.

When she mentioned her ambition to you, you were quite sceptical in the beginning but that slowly diminished once you saw the cheeky grin on her face, you soon came to realise that she wasn’t like any of them from whom you could recall due to your mother’s knowledge of them when she was still alive. Zenin was extremely strong-headed and straightforward which led to her motivation causing your respect for her to slowly rise up as each day went by.

On the other hand, you had escaped the ties of the clans, you had that advantage ahead of her since the day you came into this world, yet that changed the second you came into school that night. That wasn’t the answer you were trying to discover.

Then there was Gojo Satoru. A man that is known to be the strongest in this generation as he processed both the Limitless technique as well as the Six Eyes after 400 years assumingly and was the lone standing member of the Gojo clan unless your adoption made a change to that to which you knew it wasn’t likely at all.

To be honest, Gojo never told you his reasoning on becoming a sorcerer and it must be said that he didn’t really have a choice, to begin with. He was immediately placed into this world as the fate of the jujutsu world was resting on his shoulders while your clan was the maintenance of that order and if anything happened to the man himself, you were the next sorcerer to restore the stability of the world.

‘Ugh, what a drag…’

Although, without his words, you could predict what he wanted. Gojo seemed like he wanted a revolution. A change and actively collecting sorcerers that had the same mindset as him was one way of beginning it. You couldn’t deny that Gojo was a smart man but one with a hint of narcissist meaning to it. 

Slowly, you come to realise that you were a tool within his plan.

Something you slowly wanted to take advantage of for the time being.

However, as much as his plan was one you were tensely going to follow, that still wasn’t the answer you desired at all.

“Because I’m not supposed to exist Fushiguro, you’re a Zenin by blood, you should know that my clan shouldn’t exist after the golden age, we disappeared,” 

“That’s right...I wasn’t supposed to exist…”

Slowly you finally placed your arm back down to your side before closing your eyes allowing the darkness to consume your sight but you didn’t allow it to consume the whole of you since you weren’t willing to fall asleep outside in the world where you felt most vulnerable.

It was quiet.

From what you could sense around you at this current moment in time, there was no one around you right now, no sound of footsteps that were out of place and no lingering sense of cursed energy around you.

You felt free.

Completely free.

Even if it was for a couple of seconds.

“You know, instead of being a drag, maybe inform that you are here,” you stated, as you opened your eyes slowly to discover a well-known face staring down at you as their body towered over yours. 

“You can sense me that quick?” Gojo asked, with a cheeky smile painted on his face as he tilted his glasses down to reveal his crystal indicolite eyes that somehow looked as if they were brighter than the moon that was above the both of you right now.

“You have an immense amount of cursed energy, it’s quite easy to sense you to be honest...too easy,” you mentioned, before turning on to your side as if to avoid eye contact with him due to the feeling of him studying you like you were s subject - it was creepy.

“If you are going to study me about my ability, just go to the library in the school to read about my clan, I’m sure that is enough,” you informed your teacher, causing him to giggle at your comment before inviting himself to sit next to you.

“Nah, I got the real thing of the lingering L/N clan here and I don’t like reading~” Gojo amusingly stated, before placing a hand on the top of your head before gently ruffling your hair. “Besides, you and I both know that something is going on right now,” Gojo seriously mentioned, causing you to become slightly tense as you began to recall the unexpected attack against him that he was hinting to you.

“Do you know any curse users that are willing to work with the two curses that you encountered?” you asked Gojo in the same serious tone he gave you only for silence to fill the atmosphere leading you to turn your head slightly to see what was wrong with your adoptive father, only to notice him staring off into the distance with a nonchalant look on his face only for it to change instant with the usual playful smile he always showcased to you.

“By the way, I told Shoko to expect you tomorrow to practice your reverse cursed energy technique,” the playful teacher stated before removing his hand from your head as he stood up on his feet. “It might be difficult for you to understand since she’s not the best at explaining, but I know you’ll get it! Get back inside and get back to sleep~” he said with a teasing tone, before making his way back into the Jujutsu Tech building, leaving you alone again with your own thoughts as you stared at the direction that he had headed off to.

“What a drag…”

                                               ꕥ

“Shoko-san?” you called out, once the metal door slid open only to discover her standing between two metal tables with what seemed to be curse corpses resting there with blood splattered messily on their resting surface.

“Oh Y/N! Satoru said you were going to come by,” Ieiri mentioned with a small smile, as she turned to look at you while tying her hair back leading you to notice the very visible purple under eye bags she had.

Ieiri Shoko was the doctor within the Jujutsu Tech institution and was one of the only people that was able to use reverse cursed technique like you but more at an advanced level leading you to mentally thank Gojo for allowing you to learn from her since you had been struggling to use it to the level that she was. Even your mother was struggling to help improve your technique since the only time you were able to use it to your full potential was when you were in critical danger.

“What’s going on?” you curiously asked as you observed the gruesome sight in front of you while trying to ignore the horrible smell that was coming from the corpses as you gently placed your hand over your nose to block the scent.

“There was been an incident in Kinema Cinema and I have been asked to check out these since one of the sorcerers that were assigned to the mission stated there was something odd about them,” Ieiri explained before handing you a black elastic band leading to a confused look to invade your face.

“And I want you to help since Saturo said you have a really good sense of seeing residue of cursed energy, as well as sense, cursed energy itself,” Ieiri informed you leading you to take the hairband from her grasp as well as the other surgical mask that was needed in case you both needed to dissect something.

“Are you sure I’m allowed to do this? I don’t have a license,” you questioned, as you placed the mask over your mouth causing Ieiri to look at you before saying to not worry since she was here - which caused you to look at her with a sceptical expression before going on to the task at hand as you stood next to her to peer over one of the deceased curses that were laying on the metal bench.

While observing the gruesome sight, you began to steadily see a trail of the lingering residue of cursed energy from the whole body, yet for some reason, there was a connection to the brain as you continued to stare that the sight much to your dismay.

“Human?” you stated in a perplexed tone while continuing to look at the head as the most amount of residue was there for the most part. “There’s a connection to the brain, so I assume the brain stems have been tampered with to alter the formation of the body, but the person wouldn’t know any of that due to probably their now impaired consciousness...it’s as if the human has been transfigured in a way like the other one behind us,” you informed Ieiri, who seemed to agree with you as she lightly nodded her head.

“Though the relationship between the brain and the cursed energy is still a black box right now, they died because of the modification and not because of the sorcerer,” the doctor added, causing you to give a side glance in her direction as you continued to listen to her explanation.

“Do you think it’s to do with the soul?” you asked, as you fully turned to look at her while she looked at you in confusion.

“Right now, we’re looking at it in a biological sense but if we are talking about a cursed spirit like Sukuna for example that is doing this, it has to do with the soul rather than the body itself,” you informed the doctor, causing her to look at you with widened eyes as she didn’t expect her old schoolmate’s daughter to have such a high capability to come to different ideas since it was Gojo that was your parent after all.

“Kento will have to ask the culprit about their cursed technique to see if your theory is correct,” Ieiri mentioned, leading you to look at her confused once again as you threw your surgical mask in the bin, only for her to swiftly inform you that a grade one sorcerer by the name of Nanami Kento was the one to inform her about the situation.

“I have to make a quick call to him to explain the discovery we made. Can you step outside and wait for me before I call you back so we can proceed to your lesson?” the doctor asked you with a smile leading you to nod at her before making your way towards the metal door that had come through before as you took one more peek at the Jujutsu Tech’s doctor’s direction with a perplexed and doubtful sense.

‘What’s the reason for me to be out of the room if I got involved with the investigation? What are you hiding from me?’

However, you didn’t want to make a whole fuss about your suspicion since you really didn’t have the effort to voice out your concern leading you to leave the room with more questions plaguing your mind as the ringing tone carried itself in the air.

“This is such a drag”

© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost

[weekendwarriorblog]

The Weekend Warrior 10/1/21: VENOM: LET THERE BE CARNAGE, THE ADDAMS FAMILY II, THE MANY SAINTS OF NEWARK, TITANE, MAYDAY, THE JESUS MUSIC

Yeah, so I haven’t had the time over the past couple weeks to write a column, and I kind of hate that fact, especially since I’m coming up on a pretty major milestone for me writing a weekly box office column and reviewing movies. In fact, that milestone comes next week! And once again, I’m struggling to get through the movies I was hoping to watch and write about this week, because I’ve been out of town and once again, very busy over the weekend. Let’s see how far I get...

Before we get to this week’s wide releases, I’m excited to say that my local arthouse movie theater, The Metrograph, is finally reopening for in-person screenings, and they’re kicking things off with a 4k restoration of Andrez Zulawski’s 1981 thriller, Possession, starring Sam Neill and Isabell Adjani, who won a Best Actress prize at Cannes for her performance in the film. I actually saw this at the Metrograph a few years back, and Metrograph Pictures, the distribution arm of the company is now distributing the 4k restoration. There’s a lot of exciting things ahead at Metrograph, including an upcoming four-film Clint Eastwood retrospective, including White Hunter, Black Heart (1990) and A Perfect World (1991) this Friday. Also, Lingua Franca director Isabel Sandoval will be showing her fantastic film from 2020 (a rare chance to see it in a theater and I’ll be there!) as well as program a number of other favorites of hers. Sunday will have screenings of Ingmar Berman’s Scenes from a Marriage (1973) in its full four plus hour glory, Steven Spielberg’s Jurassic Park (1993) and John Carpenter’s In the Mouth of Madness (1994).. In other words, the Metrograph is back!

Moving over to the weekend’s three wide releases, the first one up being Sony’s VENOM: LET THERE BE CARNAGE (Sony Pictures) with Tom Hardy returning as Eddie Brock aka Venom, joined by Woody Harrelson as the psychotic symbiote, Carnage. Taking over the directing reins is Andy Serkis, who has only directed two other movies, Mowgli: Legend of the Jungle and Breathe, but as an actor, he’s been heavily involved with the CG VFX (and performance capture) needed to bring the characters in this Marvel anti-hero movie to life.

Venom has been one of Spider-Man’s most popular villains and sometimes allies for quite a few decades now, starting out life as a cool black costume Spider-Man found on a strange planet during the first “Secret Wars,” which turned out to be an alien symbiote that had malicious intentions. Spider-Man got the costume off of him but it then linked up with Eddie Brock, a sad-sack journalist whose emotions drove the alien symbiote to become the Venom we known and (mostly) love, thanks to one Todd McFarlane. Venom continued to play a large part in the Spider-Man books before getting his own comics, and not before a super-villain was created for him in Cletus Kasady, a vicious serial killer whose infection by the symbiote turns him into Carnage. And that’s who Harrelson is playing.

Being a sequel, we do have some basis to go on, although the original Venom movie, released in early October 2018, also arrived at a time when it was only the second time the character of Venom was brought to the big screen -- the first time being Sam Raimi’s Spider-Man 3, in which the character was received without much love as Ryan Reynold’s Deadpool in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. And yet, Venom did great, opening with $80.2 million and grossing $213 million domestically, which is more than enough to greenlight a sequel. (It made over double that amount overseas, too.) For comparison, the Wolverine prequel opened with $85 million but at the beginning of summer, so it quickly tailed away with other movies coming out after it. Venom: Let There Be Carnage has to worry about the new James Bond opening a week later, so it very likely could be a one-and-done, opening decently but quickly dropping down as other big movies are released in October (basically one a week).

I’ve already seen the movie, and by the time you read this, reviews will already be up --including my own at Below the Line. Social media reactions seem to not be so bad though, so maybe it’ll get better reviews than its predecessor, which was trashed by critics, receiving only a 30% rating on Rotten Tomatoes. But if you look at the fan ratings, they’re higher with 81%, although it’s hard not to be

I’m thinking that bearing COVID in mind and the law of depreciation since the previous movie, Venom: Let There Be Carnage will probably be good for around $50 million this weekend, maybe a little more, but however it’s received, I expect it to drop significantly next week, though a total domestic gross of $135 to 140 million seems reasonable.

Another strong sequel to kick off October is the animated THE ADDAMS FAMILY II (MGM), which is following up the 2019 hit for MGM/UA Releasing with most of the voice cast returning, including Oscar Isaac, Charlize Theron, Chloe Grace Moretz, and Finn Wolfhard, as well as Nick Kroll, Snoop Dogg, Martin Short, Catherine O’Hara, and Bette Midler voicing the popular characters from the New Yorker cartoons, a popular ‘60s TV series, and two Barry Sonnenfeld movies from the ‘90s.

The 2019 animated film was a pretty solid hit for the newly-launched UA Releasing, grossing $100 million domestic after a $30.3 million opening, making it one of MGM’s biggest hits since it was restructured under UA and became its own distributor again. Who knows what’s going to happen with Amazon’s plans on buying MGM and whether the latter will remain a distribution wing, but MGM still has a number of movies out this year that likely will be awards contenders. But that doesn’t mean much for The Addams Family II, which will try to get some of those people who paid to see the original movie in theaters back to see the sequel… and if they’re not going to theaters, MGM is once again offering the movie day-and-date on VOD much like they did with last year’s Bill and Ted Face the Music, which opened much earlier in the pandemic (late august, 2020), so it far fewer options to see it in theaters compared to this animated sequel.

It’s highly doubtful that The Addams Family II was going to open anywhere near to $30 million even if there wasn’t a pandemic, and it wasn’t on VOD just because MGM just doesn’t seem to be marketing the movie as well as its predecessor. You can blame COVID if you want, but it’s also the fact they’re distributing the company’s first James Bond movie in six years, No Time To Die, on their own vs. through another distributor, ala the last few Daniel Craig Bonds. But we’ll talk more about that next week, since that’s going to be an important movie to help cover MGM’s expenses for the rest of 2021. (I haven’t had a chance to see this yet, but it’s embargoed until Friday, so wouldn’t be able to get a review into the column regardless.)

We’ve seen quite a few family hits over the past few months even when the movies were already on streaming/VOD, but parents are probably being a bit more careful with kids back in school, many younger kids still not vaccinated, and the Delta variant still not quite under control. Because of those factors, I think The Addams Family II is more likely to do somewhere between $15 and 18 million its opening weekend, maybe more on the lower side.

Third up is THE MANY SAINTS OF NEWARK (New Line/WB), David Chase’s prequel to his hit HBO series, The Sopranos, which went off the air in 2004 but still finds fans on the new HBO Max streamer. Ironically, this prequel will air on the streamer at the same time as it's getting a theatrical release, which probably won't be a very tough choice for fans.

Chase has reunited with director Alan Taylor, who won a Primetime Emmy for his work on the show in 2007 before moving onto other popular shows like HBO's Game of Thrones. Taylor has had a bit of a rough career in film, though, having directed Marvel Studios’ sequel, Thor: The Dark World, a movie that wasn't received very well although there were rumors that Taylor butted heads with the producers and maybe didn't even finish the movie. He went on to direct Terminator Genesys, which honestly, I can't remember if it was the worst Terminator movie, but it was pretty bad.

What's interesting is that because this is a prequel set in the '70s and '80s, none of the actors from the show appear on it, but it does star Alessandro Nivola, a great actor in one of his meatiest roles for a studio movie. It also introduces Michael Gandolfini, son of the late James Gandolfini (who played Tony Soprano, if you didn't know), playing the teenage Tony, plus it has great roles for the likes of Jon Bernthal (as Tony's father), Vera Farmiga (playing Tony's mother), Corey Stoll (playing the younger "Junior” Soprano), and Lesile Odom Jr, as the Sopranos key adversary, even though he ends up coming across like the good guy of the movie. It also stars Billy Magnussen, who oddly, also has a key role in next week's No Time to Die.

I'm sure there's quite a bit of interest in seeing where Tony came from and to learn more about his family, many who were dead long before the events of the HBO show, but will that be enough to get them into theaters when they already have HBO? I already reviewed the movie for Below the Line, and reviews are generally positive, which might get people more interested in this prequel.

As with most of Warner Bros’ movies this year, Many Saints will also debut on HBO Max and unlike some of the studio’s other 2021 offerings, it will actually make more sense to watch this one on the streamer since that’s how most people watched The Sopranos. That seems like a killer for Many Saints, and it’s likely to keep it opening under $10 million, where it might have done better on a different weekend (like sometime over the last two weeks).

This is what I have this weekend’s top 10 looking like:

1. Venom: Let There Be Carnage (Sony) - $50.4 million N/A

2. The Addams Family II (MGM/UA Releasing) - $16.5 million N/A

3. The Many Saints of Newark (New Line/WB) - $9 million N/A

4. Shang-Chi and the Legend of the Ten Rings (Marvel/Disney) - $7.5 million -44%

5. Dear Evan Hansen (Universal) - $4.1 million -45%

6. Free Guy (20th Century/Disney) - $3.3 million -30%

7. Jungle Cruise (Disney) - $1.1 million -35%

8. Candyman (Universal) - $1.3 million -48%

9. Cry Macho (Warner Bros.) - $1 million -52%

10. Malignant (Warner Bros.) - .7 million -53%

Opening in select cities is French filmmaker Julia (Raw) Ducournau’s TITANE (Neon), the genre thriller that won this year’s coveted Palme D’Or at the Cannes Film Festival. It stars Agathe Rouselle as a young woman who has an interesting relationship with automobiles, but she also has psychotic tendencies that leaves a trail of bodies behind her. On the run, she decides to pretend she’s the missing son of a fireman (Vincent Lindon), who has been missing for 10 years, and things just get weirder from there.

I honestly wasen’t sure what to expect from this although I do remember walking out of Ducournau’s cannibal movie, Raw, just because it was so gross, even though so many of my colleagues and friends swear by the movie, and this one, for that matter. Sure, there’s a certain “prove it” factor to me watching a movie that wins the Palme D’Or, because it’s very rare that I like the movies that do win that benchmark cinema award.

After a flashback to Agathe’s character Alexia when she was an obstinate young girl kicking the back seat of her father as he’s driving. They crash and she’s forced to get surgery that puts an odd looking piece of metal in her head. Decades later, she seems to be a pseudo-stripper at weird punk rock car show -- I guess they do those things different in France -- and hooking up with a fellow “model” afterwards. Agathe is actually a very popular model/dancer but when one fan gets too grabby, she pulls a knitting needle out of her hair and stabs it through his ear, killing him. Oh, yeah, she then has sex with a car and seemingly gets pregnant, but that only happens later. First, she goes on a bit of a killing spree and then goes on a run and decides that by strapping up her breasts and breaking her nose, she can pass off this fire captain’s son… and it works!

So the second half deals with acting great Vincent Lindon’s absolutely bonkers steroid-addicted man who seems to be sexually attracted to his own son, and most of his fellow firefighters knows that he’s gay but in the closet, but I’m honestly not sure what that matters. He’s a pretty disgusting character whose 70-year-old ass we see way too much of, and even those who might find Rouselle to be quite fetching, there’s a certain point where her nudity is not alluring but quite horrifying.

Oh, and at this time, Alexia (or Adrien, as she’s now going) has also gotten significantly pregnant, but it’s not a normal pregnancy because what should be milk from her breasts seems to some sort of motor oil. That’s because she FUCKED A CAR earlier in the movie!!! What do you expect when you fuck a car and don’t use protection, girlie? The fact Alexia/Adrien is trying to hide the fact she’s a pregnant woman from a station full of men isn’t even particularly disturbing. The part that really got me was when she broke her own nose to pass off as this guy’s son -- I actually had to look away for that part.

Listen I’m no prude, and I think I can handle most things in terms of horror and gore, but Titane just annoyed me, because it felt like Ms Ducournau was doing a lot of what we see more for shock value than to actually drive the story forward. There just doesn’t seem to be much point to any of it, and once the movie gets to the firehouse, and we see her interaction (as a young man) with her “father” and his colleagues, it just gets more grueling.

It’s as if Ducournau had watched a lot of movies by the likes of Cronenberg or David Lynch, or more likely Nicolas Refn or Lars von Trier, and thought, “I could be just as strange and horrific as those men… let’s see what people think of this.” And way too many people fell for it, including the Cannes jury. While I normally would approve of any good body horror movie, especially one with cinematography, score and musical selections as good as this one, I doubt I’d ever want to watch this movie again. And therefore, I don’t think I can recommend this movie to anyone either, at least no one I want to remain my friend.

As far as the movie’s box office, NEON is opening the movie in 562 theaters to build on buzz from various film festivals, including the New York Film Festival earlier this week. I think it should be good for half a million this weekend, although maybe it'll surprise me like NEON's release of Parasite a few years back. I just don't see this getting into the top 10 but maybe just outside it.

And then we have a few more movies that I got screeners for but just couldn’t find the time to watch, but might do so once I finish this verdammt column.

The faith-based doc THE JESUS MUSIC (Lionsgate) by the Erwin Brothers (I Can Only Imagine, I Still Believe) takes a look at the rise of Christian Contemporary Music through artists like Amy Grant and Stryper and everything in between, featuring lots of interviews of the artists’ trials and triumphs. Even though there isn’t much CCM I ever listen to, I’m still kind of curious about this one, since I generally like music docs and this is guaranteed not to be the sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll of most of them. I have no idea how wide Lionsgate intends to release this but it certainly can be fairly wide, because the Erwins have delivered at least one giant hit for Lionsgate, and I Still Believe may have been another one if not for the pandemic. It actually opened on March 13, just days before movie theaters shut down across the country, so it's little surprise it only made $7 million domestic. That said, the acts in this one have a lot of fans, and if Lionsgate does release The Jesus Music into 1,000 theaters or so (which is very doable), then I would expect it would make between $1 and 2 million, which would be enough to break into the Top 10.

I haven't seen any of the movies based on Anna Todd's YA romance novels but the third of them, AFTER WE FELL, will play in about 1,311 theaters on Thursday i.e. tonight through Fathom Events, and may or may not continue through the weekend. These movies just kind of show up, and again, having not seen any of them, I'm not sure what kind of audience they have, but this one stars Josephine Langford and Hero Fiennes, as well as Stephen Moyer, Mira Sorvino and Arielle Kebbel with Castille Landon directing.

Grace Van Patten (Under the Silver Lake) stars in Karen Cinorre’s action-fantasy film MAYDAY (Magnolia), playing Ana, a young woman who is transported to a “dreamlike and dangerous” coastline where she joins a female army in a never-ending war where women lure men to their deaths. It also stars Mia Goth, Havana Rose Liu, Soko, Théodore Pellerin and Juliette Lewis. It will be in theaters and On Demand this Friday.

The great Tim Blake Nelson stars in Potsy Ponciroli’s action-Western OLD HENRY (Shout! Studios/Hideout) about a widowed farmer and son who take in an injured man with a satchel full of cash only to have to fend off a posse who come after the man, claiming to be the law. Not sure who to trust, the farmer has to use his gun skills to defend his home and the stranger.

The romantic-comedy FALLING FOR FIGARO (IFC Films) is the new movie from Australian filmmaker Ben Lewin (The Sessions), who I’ve interviewed a few times, and he’s a really nice chap. This one stars Danielle Macdonald, Hugh Skinner, and Joanna Lumley, and it will be in theaters and On Demand this Friday. This rom-com is set in the world of opera singing competitions with Macdonald playing Millie, a brilliant young fund manager who decides to chase her dream of being an opera singer in the Scottish Highlands. She begins vocal training lessons with a former opera diva, played by Lumley, where she meets Max, a young man also training for that competition. Could love blossom? This actually sounds like my kind of movie, so I’ll definitely try to watch soon.

The second season of “Welcome to Blumhouse” the horror movie anthology kicks off on Amazon Prime Video on Friday with the first two movies, Maritte Lee Go’s Black as Night (which I’ve seen) and Gigi Saul Guerrero’s Bingo Night (which I haven’t), and actually I’ll have an interview with Ms. Go over at Below the Line possibly later this week. The former stars Ashja Cooper as a teen girl living in Louisiana who has a bad experience with homeless vampires, along with her best friend (Fabrizio Guido).

Also, Antoine Fuqua and Jake Gyllenhaal’s remake of the Danish film THE GUILTY will begin streaming on Netflix starting Friday after premiering at TIFF a few weeks back. I never got around to reviewing it, but it’s pretty good, maybe a little better than the original movie but essentially the same. I’d definitely recommend it if you like Jake, because he’s definitely terrific in it.

Also hitting Netflix this week is Juana Macias' SOUNDS LIKE LOVE (Netflix), a Spanish language romance movie that (guess) I haven't seen!

A few other movies I didn’t get to this week, include:

STOP AND GO (Decal) VAL (Dread) BLUSH (UA Releasing) RUNT (1091 Pictures)

Next week, it’s not time for James Bond, it’s time for James Bond to die… no, wait… there is NO TIME TO DIE! Also, a very, very special anniversary for the Weekend Warrior….

[brekkiejeon]

Once Upon An Us | Chapter 1

Pairing: Husband!Jeon Jungkook x Wife!Reader 

Word count: 4.6k

Genre: Fluff, Smut

Warnings: penetrative sex, lots of kissing, profanity

Summary: Love can be complicated and heartaches remain when y/n learns the truth about her husband, which had affected them both to their melancholia. Will their relationship come to an end or will they still be able to fight for it despite the brokenness on their shoulders?

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CHAPTER 1: Celebration

Getting married to the love of your life feels like a dream, it’s heaven on earth for sure. It’s the both of you against all odds, that is the reality. You choose them because your heart and mind said so. You choose them because that’s where your happiness resides, among all it is home. You choose them every day, not only once and staying with them through thick and thin, through everything, is everything. As you both fall asleep and wake up each day next to each other, always keep in mind that you will now be spending the rest of your life with them. With that, nothing changes, you will only receive love from now on.

Jungkook, your husband, had planned something extravagant for your birthday and since you celebrated your anniversary last month, he wanted to make it extra special. He knew that his wife was tenacious, so he arranged an exceptional party only for the two of you and everything must be according to what his mind had thought of.

The first thing on his list was to surprise you with a bouquet of roses varying in shades of pink and red. You were awakened by the greeting of it and with Jungkook holding them while he gazes at you. He admired the way his wife’s porcelain skin glows along with her rosy cheeks that he finds too beautiful to even get tired of looking at. You loved flowers ever since the two of you were still dating and you appreciate it even now whereas having the confidence to do this to impress someone is one that is romantic and heartfelt. Jungkook adored that you were never a materialistic person and were never in it for the riches considering that you would already be the happiest woman even if it’s just a date without a large number of expenses involved. Honestly, you cherish the small things rather than those big yet temporary ones. You prefer to be with Jungkook more than anything, as long as you’re with him, that’s what matters to you. But this time, he wanted to spoil you with everything you deserve to have.

Jungkook smiled, cupping your cheeks. “Good morning, sweetheart.” Smiling back at him, you sat up as he moves closer to you. His lips met yours on a passionate kiss that made your heart happy. What an amazing way to wake up. “Happy Birthday.” You shifted on his lap and hugged him, arms wrapping around his neck while you rest your head against his chest. “Thank you so much.”

This man was something of a dream you never had expected to become your reality. It was breathtaking.

He placed a hand on your thigh, giving it a gentle massage and assuring you about your birthday party. “Get dressed, we’re going somewhere. I have a surprise just for you, baby.”

“You will love it,” Jungkook whispered, making you shudder from his hot breath fanning your ear. He slapped your ass and told you to get up because you will have a long day ahead with him. Ambling towards the bathroom door, your eyes landed on the embellishments in front of you and got fascinated by your husband’s effort in preparing your bath. The tub was filled with rose petals floating with the candle’s aroma that was surrounding the whole bathroom. As lovely as this may be, you won’t be in it much longer than you desired to be because you cannot ditch your little adventure with your husband.

The next thing you remember was Jungkook went shopping with you and he let you buy all the things you want. You doubt about spending it too much on unnecessary stuff, but he urged you to despite refusing from it. “It’s my treat y/n. Don’t worry.” You purchased a good quantity of cosmetics and clothes—you even bought a new set of black lingerie because Jungkook loves seeing you in it. To him, black is a seductive color that matches your active sex life. One example was when you’ve worn one of his shirts and compared from his big body to yours, it looked like a dress—an oversized shirt. You wanted to surprise Jungkook by wearing his favorite lingerie underneath but as soon as you stripped, he was quicker than your mind and already had you pinned against the wall as he attacks your neck with love bites which then advanced to the things that were bound to happen after it. The occasional make-out sessions you had with him define how your intimacy drives up your relationship to the next level and because of that, he started coaxing you about having children, albeit you told him that you’re on birth control that time—wherein you also added that pregnancy can wait and when the time comes, you will be ready to conceive your first child. Jungkook being the caring husband he was, worked harder to sustain you but instead told him that he was everything you needed which made him smile.

Another one was he did water activities with you on this hot day—parasailing, scuba diving, and surfing. He took you to this beautiful resort with very few people as it was not that famous. For every fifteen minutes, you applied a good amount of sunscreen since it was difficult for you to maintain your skin but you’d love to get a tan too. You had the best time, thanks to him.

Of course, it didn’t end there. The resort was actually where you and he would always drop by back then—spreading a picnic blanket and eating dinner while you talk about your lives, watching the sky painted in midnight blue and with stars augmented across it. Nowadays, not even a little chance have you ever returned to this place because of work and lately, Jungkook has been working overtime, even you that results in this couple all knocked out and usually sleeping on the weekend.

However, he rekindles these kinds of dates as he thought about how significant those were, for he knew that you are just a simple girl—not the ideal girl he wishes to have although you were much more than what he had ever prayed for. Jungkook wanted to restore these things when you were still young lovers, afraid of the contrasting time that will get the best out of each of you in which you may be unable to maintain this pastime if so. He downright believes that those seven years of love showed no signs of change from your relationship, yet, even after getting married two years ago, it was still the same love that you both have been holding on to since the beginning.

Jungkook holds your hand and you saunter by the sea barefooted. “I couldn’t imagine being with someone other than you.” He implied while you succumb from the actuality as such. “I know, it’s scary.”

If it weren’t him, who would it be?

“This feels like seven years ago, y/n. Time flies.”

“Those were the days.”

The two of you stopped walking for a moment and faced each other as the waves submerge your feet. Jungkook smiled, observing this woman in front of him. You can see his chocolate eyes sparkle under the moonlight, with the sea that makes the primary cause of serenity to this place. He holds your back and you placed your hands on his shoulders. Both of you swayed along with the breeze to this familiar motion. It was just like your first dance at your wedding.

After the final twirl, he gently pulls you closer and gave you a tight hug, nuzzling your head against his chest. The night was beautiful. It brought you back to when the wedding had happened. His lips then captured yours, sinking into the soft pink skin that nearly stopped the moment.

Jungkook stroked your hair, combing it with his fingers. “I couldn’t thank you enough, baby. I had fun today.” Silently watching the sea, your arms muffled around his waist. The waves serenade your ears as the night falls darker, the stars also multiplied like glitter. He smirked to himself while placing his chin over your head. “I still have one more surprise for you at home, y/n. It’ll be fun.”

“Let’s go home, baby. Your last present is waiting for you.”

Afterward, he gathers your stuff and went to help him pack at the back of the car. Slamming the door closed, he starts the engine while you sit beside him on the passenger seat. Jungkook takes your hand, intertwines it with his own and kissed the back of it. On the way home, he suddenly puts his hand on your thigh, lightly pressing onto the delicate skin. His big veiny hand that was placed on your flesh immediately made your insides clench, especially down there, unable to restrict your mind from sexual fantasies. You divert yourself on the road and ignored his hand that was near your crotch. He looks for it again and you swiftly grasp it, his big hand enveloping with your small ones.

Making a turn to the next street, he safely parked the car and helped you carry the shopping bags inside the house. He stopped in the midst of you scampering towards the front door.

“We’re home, go find your present.” Jungkook played with the car keys upon entering the kitchen. You hurriedly roamed every room, curious about his hint and meticulously eyeing every corner of the house to see if he hid it somewhere. The search didn’t go successfully and you have given up, plopping on the bed, scrolling through your phone and responding to the birthday greetings they’ve sent.

You heard the door open and saw a man of ethereal appearance, which was your husband. You placed your phone on a table nearby and watched him. Jungkook fixates to your figure, his eyes steadily carry passion. He strides towards you without breaking eye contact until he reaches your shared bed with your faces exceedingly close to each other. Tugging you on his lap, your legs were on either side of his waist and your genitals were grinding against each other though it was hindered by the clothes you both are wearing.

While holding you, he begins skimming on your neck, inhaling your scent that was like a drug to him, addicting. You closed your eyes, his breath hitting your smooth skin then he slowly rises to your lips to meet his, securing your cheeks with his hands and indulging his plump lips connected to yours. Your head rises and falls from the kiss he’s dominating, lungs calling for air as it yearns for the oxygen it needs that had you panting afterward.

Jungkook returns to your neck, sucking on the flesh that formed tiny bruises. He repeats and this time, his teeth dug into it for pleasure. “How are you, sweetheart?” He emits an alluring husky tone of his voice, sending chills to your spine and a spark down to your core. “I–I feel…great.” You stuttered a reply, unable answer properly by his touch.

His hands travel in different directions on your back and thighs, drawing you closer until there’s no longer a gap between the two of you.

The atmosphere was searing and the night has fallen into the darkest hour. He leaned to your ear, mumbling about something, “Congratulations y/n, you have found your present.” You can feel him smile against your ear, silently celebrating from winning you over. He bites your earlobe as your hands find their way to pull his hair.

“Just what I thought it would be.”

Cupping your jaw, he rubbed his thumb over your lips.“ Oh, my horny little wife wants to be fucked.” He settles in for the next part of your session. The smug look on his face made your nerves tighten together. He was not the baby Jungkookie you have anymore and you gulped. What a daddy.

“Let me show you the real fun, baby.”

His bump was now pressing on your damp region, rubbing it against your now soaked panties that had you fidgeting. Jungkook returned to your face and bites your lower lip, gaining access to your tongue and the permission to taste your mouth. He moved further from the bed by letting his fists do the job to recline against the headrest while you were situated between his legs.

Stifling a groan, he continues murdering your lips. You work on the buttons of his shirt until the item was discarded somewhere on the floor, followed by your husband who mastered lifting the hem of your dress over to your head, kicking his jeans and at once, you both were left in your underwear.

Your hands journey to his chest and gradually sliding it down to his toned abs. His bulge was now evident from his boxers and you were already craving for more—for the thirst your body wants right now. Jungkook was illegal, an epitome of the word sexy and seductive that makes your temptations run the wildest and your mind berserk.

“Take off your bra for me.” He looks at you with half-lidded eyes, waiting for you to obey his command. Laying yourself in a sitting position, you unclasp the hook of your bra and letting it fall on your lap. His fiery eye engrossed your chest and soon finds himself fondling them.

Jungkook then swoops down to your lips again, aggressively placing your hand on his erection. “Look how hard you made me, y/n.” His shaft already awaits its recipient to do the work and was greedy for its habitat as your lower region instantly quivered.

He guides your hands to grab the waistband of his boxers, quickly stripping the fabric off and revealing his bulbous penis that slapped his abdomen. You let out a sigh of lust as you become hypnotized by his length. He was big—and most likely will outstretch the walls of your vagina. A tingling feeling of your core begins to rise from within, soaking you more than before. Resting his back against the headrest, he started jerking off while it stupefied you, flaunting his libido behind the wholesome character you knew from your husband.

“Show me what you got.”

Jungkook summoned you to join his act. With that, you crawled towards him and returned to wrap your hand around his girth and started pumping it. He groaned as his head lolled up, closing his eyes and relishing the firm grasp of your hand.

“Y/n–fuck, don’t stop.” His cock was so hard that all of his muscles were tensed up due to the stimulation.

“You’re a whole fucking meal, Jungkook.” You teased as you licked the tiny discharge of his precum on the tip. Once you’re done moistening his head, you slowly ingest his shaft, taking time to adjust from his size and groaning breathlessly while he holds your hair to keep it in place.

“Your mouth feels so good, baby.“

His hand simultaneously rocked back and forth while you suck him. Holding his thighs for support, you quicken your maneuver. It reached the back of your throat as he thrusts upward, making you gag by the harsh plunge of his cock. The way he expanded through the innermost part of your mouth had you close to swallowing him whole. He constantly feeds you with it, satisfying your appetite and leaving you starving for more.

Keeping it on a fixed tempo, your mouth had provided adequate amusement and warmth to moisturize his shaft that will be convenient to where he will be administering to next. He enjoyed fucking your mouth and you shed a tear after your lungs get worn out from the abrupt choking down your throat and screaming for a reservoir of ventilation.

Your mouth withdraws from his penis, lubricating it with your spit as it shivered to the cold air of the bedroom. Jungkook laid you on the pillows with him on top of you and his hands were placed on either side of your shoulders. It was now his turn to pleasure you.

At once, he stormed back to your neck, adding the love bites he made earlier. Your husband adored every inch of your skin and he praised it like he had never seen something much more stunning than this. Your curves, your freckles that scattered on your neck and collarbone, your thighs—you. Despite the imperfections, you were everything his heart desires.

Jungkook cups your breasts, pinching your sensitive nipple as he sucked the other one. You arch your back from the thrilling sensation of his mouth and he gently massaged them afterward that had you squirming under him. You can feel your underwear drenched and uncomfortably sticking to your folds, growing impatient from the foreplay.

Gripping the sheets tightly, he spreads your legs wider to plant kisses on your thigh and noticed the visible wet spot on your middle, lightly pressing onto it. He rubs his thumb in circles on the soaked material that was concealing your womanhood. “You’re so wet, baby. We’re not even halfway through your present.” This was not even the focal point of the session yet it was already exciting the fuck out of you, needing for something more.

He aggressively pulled your panties down your legs and now joined the other materials on the ground, both fully naked. Out of his frenzy, Jungkook takes a good look at your cunt as he opens your wet folds, intoxicated by the sight that he will surely put his cock into good use with. Without warning, he inserts two fingers, curling it up until they were entirely inside of you. “Ughhhh-” You stifled a moan as you felt your heart beating rapidly from glee, feeling his long fingers slide to and fro. Your liquid coats his fingers, almost bathing them from the big loads of juices squelching and oozing out due to his arousal. He added another finger and continued pumping it that pretty much made you reach your peak. He removes them and a sudden trace of frustration flashes on your face.

He joins your lips together, abusing it from passion as you taste yourself. Your husband then teases you by rubbing the tip against your folds. Although you know that this was a part of your present, you remained relaxed under his control because he will be the one to make it happen.

Your folds met the warm muscle of his tongue that savored you to the highest extent, licking your wet pussy, driving you insane. “Shit–Jungkook!” You mewl out his name, slightly parting your lips, your breath hitching.

“Tell me what you want and I’ll give it to you,” Jungkook asked you, pretending not to know what you longed for, however, the answer was already obvious and he just wants to hear it straight from your mouth.

You sighed as you squeeze his shoulders in despair, telling him to go on. “I want you, Jungkook.” A smirk appears on his face. Your vague reply wasn’t the right answer to his question and he continued teasing you. He playfully massaged your clitoris, gasping from the stimulation he’s performing and once more slotting his fingers inside your wet cavern.

“Baby, I want you inside of me, please.” You implored and he raises an eyebrow.

Referring to his fingers curled up into your core, he replied. “I am inside.”

Your nails dig into the fabric of the sheets, growing desperate. “You’re so wet, sweetheart. What do you want me to do with your pussy?” Unable to contain yourself, you quietly suffered from sexual frustration as he patiently waits for your response.

“Should I just fuck it using my fingers? I’ll only let you have this big cock if you mean it.”

“I want your cock inside of me, Jungkook! Fuck me mercilessly.” You exclaimed.

Briefly returning to being a soft husband he was, Jungkook smiles as he pecked your lips, finally rewarding you with the gift you will surely remember your whole life. As a husband and perhaps a soon-to-be father, he loves this kind of romance since it was important. It’s where you had each other first before having a child before stepping into the world of parenthood and this was one of his special moments with his wife. He loves being a husband.

“Happy birthday baby.”

Full of lust and desire his stare was, he had finally shown his dominant side which was already urging you to submit before him. No one knows how crazy he is in bed, even him whose libido is extreme when provoked—and you, who had come to surrender, must brace to this man who will take you to see the stars.

Jungkook smooches you for the umpteenth time, getting down to his business. He started rubbing his swollen cock to your entrance and slowly pushes it inside as you inhale sharply. Your walls clench around his girth, stretching your cervix. Staying in that same position, he waits for you to adjust to his size, you furrow your eyebrows in discomfort and it was later replaced by pleasure.

Pulling out and barging in, he repeats it in intervals for you to get used to him. You wrapped your legs around his waist and closed your eyes, securing him in between yourself. The pace becomes faster than before, his hair bouncing and it tickled your chest .

“Jungkookkk–nngghh” You moan, though your voice was trembling. It came to his senses how proud he is to make you feel this good. Well, it was his responsibility after all—as proclaimed and promised in front of the altar. He looks forward to more intimate moments together besides making love, he knows there’s more.

“You’re so fucking tight, y/n.” He growls above you, sliding his cock in and out, stretching the hot walls of your vagina. Your whimpers begin to echo and it was the kind of music he loves to hear, almost often if possible. 

Groaning after a series of thrusting, he randomly expresses his obsession with your throbbing core. “Damn, I love this pussy.” Specifically, when it comes to kinks, you have this thing called a ‘praise kink’, which was done by your husband a while ago. It so happened that Jungkook seems to have a lot of kinks other than your thighs, and it was determined by your further observations. It’s a lot.

“It makes me want to fuck it in every single way–” He begins pounding into you, securing your hips from his grip as he hauled your leg over his shoulder for deeper penetration. “–And fill you up with my cum to make lots of babies with you.” Proceeding to touch your clitoris, he massages your most sensitive bud.

You catch a breath and moaned out his name. “Aaahhhh-”, To him, it was only you he wants to feel this good, no other. 

The thrusts were harder, deeper, and quicker that sent you over to the galaxies as your moans filled the room, screaming in gratification. This was the greatest gift he had ever given to you besides those prized possessions he pampers you with. It was love–and yes, sex.

“Of course I want to have babies with you, Jungkook.” You admit. A bunny smile unfolds from his face, triumph conquering his demeanor. You still remember him bugging you about kids for a long time ever since you got married, yet you cannot guarantee when you will want to have your first one. He respected your decision, nonetheless. But this time, you are certain about it.

Your breasts bounced to the rhythm while your cheeks were tinted rosy pink from pleasure. He moves on to caress it once more, hardly burying your head against the cushion as you writhe from the contact.

“Faster!” You demand and he followed, serving you with a round of heavy thrusts that felt pure ecstasy, eyes rolling back to your skull to this sweet yet libidinous act. His cock fits well around your narrow walls despite how big he was, welcoming it inside its abode and hitting your g-spot several times.

“Yes daddy, right there! Ughh—”

“You’re so gorgeous, y/n. So fucking gorgeous.”

Jungkook groaned when he felt your long nails scratch his back, forming reddish lines that sting. He gets a hold of your waist to gyrate, taking his turn to the bottom and clutching your hips as you start riding him endlessly. His eyes were  so intoxicated to see something so wondrous—his wife getting fucked by him, his wife’s beautiful body, his wife specifically.

Screams of pleasure resonated the bedroom, both attempting to reach the summit of their desire and you’ve come to witness something coil up in your stomach.

“Shit! Aaaahh-” Jungkook slaps your ass, earning a whimper from you and with him repeating it as they formed hand marks on your buttcheeks.

“Only daddy can fuck you this fucking good, baby.” A conceited grin emerged from his face, adding another mark on your buttcheek. “I fucking love you so much, y/n—and I love fucking you.”

Impotent to hear his crude words, you speculated on how he managed to last this long in bed when some men are already on the verge of it. How exciting.

Your breasts make a great view in front of him as he fondled it, feeling ecstatic on how undeniably perfect they were.

“I can’t believe this is all mine.”

His length went to the chasm part of your pussy, coating it more of your wetness from the continuous intercourse that easily makes his dick hit your sensitive spot.

“I’m so close, daddy.” You muttered and were startled once he grabbed your neck quickly, lightly constricting the air passage in which you struggled. As tormenting as it had been, it was gratifying at some point though, his big hands will choke you until you beg him for more.

Beads of sweat formed on his forehead and more have glistened on his broad chest. “Me too, baby.” You bend down and took a good look at his face as your tongue licked his lips, capturing them. His hand moved to support your waist and you went on telling him, “I love you so much, Jungkook.”

He beamed through the kiss, loving the fact that his surprise became a wonderful experience and that you had loved it. To the girl who was born today, to the girl who had the privilege to meet him, and to the girl that unbeknownst to her, will be the one marrying Jeon Jungkook. She was lucky, and so is he.

“I love you too, y/n.”

Moaning against his mouth, you felt him release his seed inside of you, stuffing you up of for good. It was sprinkling blissfully during this time as you both reached the climax, joining together in euphoria. It was hot, sticky, and fucking filthy.

You can feel your vagina pulsate along with his cock still inside. Long, warm breaths echoed along with the gradual rising and falling of your chests. Your throbbing sex was exhausted but contented from the activity, juices dripping down your vagina. You both catch your breaths and you collapsed on his chest while his strong arms embraced you for warmth.

Gently lifting yourself, he slowly pulls out and shifted sideways so you were beside him and you face each other. Jungkook smiled, checking you out, now transforming back as your baby Kookie.

He rubs your back in circles. “Did you like your present?” Jungkook notices your blushy cheeks and your still smooth skin bathed in sweat from the after-sex.

“I loved it.”

The two of you spent another hour laughing together as if you weren’t drained from all of the energy hours ago. Naked with only the blankets covering your bodies, you both had come to decide whether or not you’d take a shower but instead preferred to just sleep the night away.

“Make my ultimate dream come true, baby. I would love to see little Jeons running around the house.” With that, he takes your hand and kisses it, intertwining it with his.

“I got you, Kookie.”

masterlist | main | next

[happilyneverafters]

Maybe this isn’t worth it. I’ve tried to kill you off in the story of my life but have failed many times. I’ve wrote about you at least a million times since you’ve left... prayed about you a million and one... but maybe I wasn’t being honest with myself. Maybe I didn’t lay everything out like I needed to, maybe because I never knew what I felt either. Words on a blank screen can’t even begin to express the overpowering reality that hides within the words. So, knowing you’ll never read this, knowing it won’t save my heart, knowing this won’t change anything... let me start at the beginning.

You were always the friend I had to ride the bus with, or to watch play baseball along side my guy friends... that was all. You had her and I was his. I was his. For so long. He was all I knew. But the longer our relationship went on, the more toxic we got... the more toxic I got. I was a child, I didn’t know what it meant to be someone’s partner in life. I was raised watching the drama of Jersey Shore and Teen Mom... having trust issues, stalking, assuming and being controlling/being controlled was all I knew. We fought over silly things, trust wasn’t even a word in our vocabulary and growing up together began to seem like a competition. College came around and I was ready to give it all to him. I stayed home for him, choosing a degree that would get me out as soon as I could just to be with him, fighting him that he wasn’t doing the same. Isn’t that was love is? So I moved away. Yet he still had me under his grip. And made it visible by placing a promise ring on my hand. That is what love is, right? I shut down. Didn’t speak to any male, went to class and came right back, went to visit him every weekend and did everything in my power to make him love me that much more considering we were apart. Guess the girls at NKU were prettier, funnier, more outgoing, party girls who weren’t me. Little miss wifey was gone and so was he. That’s where you came back in. You were done with high school. You weren’t with her. And you, lived in my new town. But our paths crossed at the wrong time. Remember when I said little miss wifey was gone? Yeah, she was gone. She wanted to party, to be wanted by college guys, to do as she pleased and wear what she pleased and do whatever it is that provoked her... I hadn’t had that freedom in over four years. So, you didn’t fight me on that, you let me continue that lifestyle as long as you were there and I took advantage of that. Let’s be honest, I knew from the first day we spent time together that you were who I was in love with. The connection we had was unmatched. You were my best friend. You showed me off, waited on me hand and foot, came to my rescue when I asked you not to, laughed with me until we cried... and then, you did the one thing I asked God for... you prayed for me. And you weren’t shy about it. That, is when I knew you were who I needed to spend my life with, but I didn’t deserve you. I was treating you like you were an accessory. I still wanted to be “free”, assuming that freedom was only when you were single, because as much I needed you, I didn’t want to fall back into that toxic trap that the word “relationship” triggered for me. I pushed you away. Told you a lie to get you to leave and kept doing things to intentionally hurt you so you wouldn’t forgive me. My plan worked. How selfish was I? How immature was I? How could I let go the love of my life because I wanted a collegiate athlete to think I was sexy? Jokes on me.

You moved on. Just like I expected. But I was happy for you. Genuinely happy. She was who I should have been for you. But instead of hating her, I supported you. I wanted you to be with her. I wanted to watch you live out this beautiful love story even if it wasn’t with me. But as for myself, I never forgave myself just like you shouldn’t have.

While you proposed to her, I got wasted.

But then one day, your name popped up on my phone. My heart sank... a mistake, I’m sure. But in reality, it wasn’t. It was fate. And this, this is where the real story begins. You were back... the engagement was off, the relationship had ended and God gave me another chance with the one I had asked for so many years ago. I wasn’t going to ruin it. The moment you stepped out of your car and walked to my front door, I knew... I knew it was you who I had been searching for, who God had wrecked and rebuilt my life for during these years. I wasn’t going to mess this up. Our connection was still unmatched. You were still my best friend. Our story picked up where we left off. How could I get so lucky? Only God can do something like this and I thank Him so much for another shot at love, with you. You had showered me with love before and I was going to do the same now. I wanted to prove to you that I wasn’t who I used to be, I wasn’t who your ex turned out to be and I was going to make sure I was who you needed someone to be. You deserved it and I wanted to be who you prayed for, just like I did you. And it was easy, it was natural, I didn’t have to try or pretend or even push for it to happen... with you, it’s just different. But I messed up. Again. Shocker. I told you to hang out with someone else, in hopes you would hate it and miss me instead. I told you to enjoy your “freedom” that you so badly wanted, because you, just like me, assumed it was gone in a relationship like your last. But I wanted you to get tired of that so-called freedom and want me next to you, like I did you. Once I realized this, I knew I had to fix it. Taking you away on a weekend trip, planning everything I thought you would enjoy, buying us dinner and drinks, showing you off and showing that I could party with you (while hoping to also make you jealous) then come home and prove to you that you were a man, a man in many forms, a man that I loved... and never stopped loving. Mistake #2. Why would I say that? You just ended an engagement. There’s no way you had loved me this entire time. Why would I blurt that out? You left. And immediately went to someone new. Of course. How could I compare? To a fun college teenager with the perfect body figure, who had natural beauty, was able to party (without making you jealous) and could keep you on your toes. Who didn’t blurt out those three words that turned into five. The complete opposite from me. And that, I couldn’t handle. God gave me this chance and I wasn’t letting you go that easily. But hearing the words: “you’re not my person” “I don’t have feelings for you” “I don’t want anything to do with you” coming from the voice of a man you’ve dreamt of spending your life with, hits a little differently. Or should I say a lot differently.

I went into a depression. And not one I was ever familiar with. I didn’t necessarily want to die because of you, but if I did die, I would be thankful that I wasn’t in pain anymore. I prayed for that sometimes... how thankful I am to live but if God just so happened to end my earthly life, I would be more thankful. I was sick. Mentally, physically and emotionally. The person that God had been working so hard on, was taken away and thrown into an endless daze. I didn’t recognize myself in the mirror. I didn’t blame you, I couldn’t. You can’t make someone love you, you can’t make someone’s decisions for them... but in this case, maybe I kinda did. Either way... it wasn’t you. It was me. Everything that went wrong, was me. So watching you for months, moving on with the one of your dreams... another new young college student, a sorority sister, the beauty queen, the stereotypical popular girl who could ruin your life with one smile... she won my man. Well, the man I asked God for. The man I cried myself to sleep over. The man I would do anything to get back. She didn’t have to try, it was her, wasn’t it? Isn’t it?

I wrecked myself. Hating every inch of who I was. Questioning why I was the way I am. Regretting every decision I had made for years. Tearing apart every part of my being, inside and out. And making it known to myself, that I, ruined what could have been. The life that God had handed to me was ripped from my hands before I even got a chance to feel the adventure. But now, God has restored me again. Building me up into the woman I am supposed to be, for myself and for someone else. But why, do I hope and wish and pray, that the love of my life who I am gifted with forever with, is still you? You, who made it clear that you wanted nothing to do with me. You are someone else’s. You don’t even consider my existence anymore. So why, do I think that my growth, will attract you back? Is it because they say third times a charm? Is it because I don’t want to believe your love for her is genuine? Is it my selfishness and conceited personality thinking that you said those words to me in false terms? Am I still the toxic person I once was, begging God for someone else’s man? Is God keeping you on my heart and just telling me to be a patient? To let you find me on your own? Or is it Satan? Taunting me with the reality that you’re not mine?

I was alone. I am alone still. Since you’ve been gone. My best friend says I don’t deserve you, that the way you left was evil, that it wasn’t my fault... but she’s just being a good girlfriend. You had every right to leave. But why can’t you come back? Why don’t you miss me and bathe in pain the way I have for so many months? How can that be possible? I daydream of what it would be like to see your name pop up on my phone once more or what would be said if we reunited again. I plan everything that I would say to you, the way I would hold you and kiss you like you’ve never been kissed. I flatter myself by reciting words I would die to hear you say to me. I fall asleep every night to the memory of your heart beat and wake up to the reality of you no where to be found. How can I be so stupid? To let myself crave you knowing you won’t return. I will never blame you for choosing the path you did. I’ll never be grateful for the trauma that was left in your dust, though it kept you with me when I was left alone. I’ll never forgive myself for letting you go. But I’ll never love anyone the way I love you. I will never choose someone the way I choose you every day. I’ll never find the love that will complete me the way you do even in your absence. And I will never forget you, as much as you told me to do so. Because it’s you, the one God created for me, it will always be you. No one will ever take that place and frankly, I don’t want anyone to come close to taking that place. It’s yours, it will always be yours, even when there isn’t a place for me with you. And I’m sorry, that all of those years ago, when the moment I knew it was truly you... that I told you it wasn’t.

[flyjacket06-blog]

Current Episode: The Retract

You know... The older you get, the more you value your alone time. Or just time in general. I remember a much younger me, going out to party pretty much all weekend. Drinking copious amounts of booze, looking for a crush that same night. This weekend I spent alone, entirely getting high and sleeping, resting for the week ahead. Adulting man...it’s weird. I bet a bunch of you, much like me, would go back to their younger selves and say, “Don’t ever say, ‘I can’t wait to grow up’“. I made this blog as a venture to express myself to complete strangers. None of my family or friends know about this and I kinda wanna keep it that way. There’s no right way into living life. Infact, the only way to learn life is to make mistakes and learn from that or others. We get older and compare ourselves to others, mainly our parents or friends. I now find that less is more. Less people around me equals more happiness. With life, the more you think you know, the less you’ll understand. Keep that in mind. Right now I’m going through a weird moment in life. I’ve cut all my friends out; they are just one giant disappointment after another. In fairness, a combination of life issues, plus their cock ups have created a giant snowball effect which I’ve decided to avoid by becoming a recluse. At times I catch myself thinking about suicide, but a few things are stopping me from actually doing it. One: I’m too good looking to kill myself. I mean, I think i’m good looking and I’ve never had an issue with women or sexual confidence. Two: who’s really gunna take care of my cat if I die? Like I’m thinking about that now and kinda peeved if someone gets my cat and doesnt take care of her. Three: I’m not a God fearing man, but being raised Catholic to some degree has taught me that suicide and renouncing God are the only two ways into Hell. I don’t really wanna take that chance nor have my last living action condemn me for the afterlife I’d be so fast to head to. Damn mythology from the Church! Curse you! I guess I’ll lay it out there for you. My government is suing me for unpaid student loans. Nothing crazy. Something like 12k, but it’s gotten to small claims court and lawyers and well....this is a first experience for me. If you don’t know, I do not do well with first experiences. There’s a learning curve and a coping issue when it comes to first experiences. While my recovery time has greatly increased since I was in my twenties, it still takes a few days for me to see the larger picture of things and regain a level head. To each their own. At work, I was dealing with becoming a fresh new leader among the new and old set of crews. Another first experience, which I managed to flub, atleast I feel that I flubbed it up. There was a moment when I called out three co workers for their lack of ...well...work ethic. You’ll have seen it or been through it. You’re working and you’re working hard. Just grinding, but others are kinda lolly-gagging and gingerly moving when you need post-haste movement. Sure it was the first show; Sure I made the inappropriate call over the radio for a meeting. I had to express myself to these guys that whatever it was that they were doing that day, was complete garbage. I alienated them and myself. Coulda chosen a better way to approach it really. That same night, pretty much broke down in front of my boss. Humiliating in retrospect, but the build up of things got to me. The fact that my landlord refuses to fix a wall in my place, so when it rains heavy, mushrooms grow outta the baseboards. MUSHROOMS! INSIDE! How the fuck... it’s only been six months since I reported the first of three incidents. Who know’s what’s behind and under those walls and floors. Who knows what spores i’ve been breathing in. Then I get to work and I’m put in this situation where I have more responsibility and I’m being relied on to do more and lead a motley crew. These guys and I came up together and now symbolically, I’m above them but they just aren’t taking the things I take serious, serious themselves. You know how frustrating that is?! When you need to get the job done and they are like, “Yeah, okay hummm”. Main problem of that stemmed from the fact that some new guy, a real new aged stoner complainer type, created a stir with me over absolutely nothing. I’m trying to help this fool and he snaps at me, goes behind my back and tells my boss i’m bullying him?! The man is 40 something and at best, a pan sexual imp. If he can’t handle direction or control his sensitive side, then I suggest he apply to Wal-mart to become a greeter. The guy legit goes out of his way (and brags about it) to sue people or corporations where he can. That should tell you what type of character he is. He was the first one I cut out this year. I’ll let him be someone elses problem. As for the other co-workers I disciplined with that meeting, we seem to be on better terms, but realistically since they won’t know, or understand my responsibilities going into this new season, I’ve quietly backed away and kept my own counsel towards things and people.  Oh my phone screen broke at work. Managed to go several phones without having that issue and boom; it happened. My boss said he could fix it, if I got the spare parts. I did! Then he lost my phone! Can you believe that?! Lost my broken phone... He claims he found it and fixed it, but that was day’s ago... Funny how when you’re phone goes MIA, life turns upside down. In my case, it took a while. I deleted all my social media weeks ago. That’s means I was using my phone as an actual phone. Also tells you how pissed off I was with people and the world. One disappointment after another. I figured I needed to recharge my batteries and focus on myself again. Of course the sudden deletion of social media prompted others to bother me on the daily if I was, “okay”. Unbeknownst to them, each time someone asked me if I was, “okay”, I felt more and more uneasy. I really questioned there for a good solid moment how much I had left in the tank. So a broken screen on a phone wasn’t a bad thing. My boss losing my phone after having it for two days...kinda irked me. But what irks me more is that I believe he fixed it and hasn’t give it back to me. I say that because I went into the office and saw my phone charging. Atleast I think it was my phone. It has no sim card in it, so when I touched the home button, and saw it had no sim card, but a fresh new screen, I began to think.... “Why? Why hasn’t this been given to me?!” Esp after the intense, painstakingly slow process it took to back up my old phone to new software and the back up. The process of removing apps and pictures and songs to acquire the capacity space needed for the restore. The endly prompts telling me the restore didn’t work, to log in for this or that ID. Like fuck! A good solid two hours of my life, gone! Reading about how to fix iTunes and error codes, just to load information onto my burner phone, when I likely have a perfectly good phone, not being used or given to me?! HELP!!! As you can imagine, when I got served my papers, I had to rethink and redo all my budget. The end result was losing a lot of savings money to off set a credit card. Fine, I did it, it’s outta the way and done for. I’m thankful for that, but a lack of money has always made me...moody. Without money, you can’t pay for rent or food or anything! Money is freedom and you understand it better as you get older. Add all the issues I just stated above and you get a fuck storm. So to recap: -Got sued -expunged most of my money -Strained workplace relationships -People & friends letting me down consistenly -Broke phone -Boss lost phone trying to fix it -Several mistakes made which I was hard on myself and that’s been how it’s going of late. I’m dealing with it better; having no social media actually helps. But for fucks sakes, I use the whole being sued thing just floats on. They are not disputing my payment plan and want me to pay more. Like fucking blood suckers. I know happiness is a choice. I know tough times don’t last, tough people, But all I want to do right now is disappear....

[ifishouldvanish]

The Boston Hour (15/?)

In which Belle is an Antiques Roadshow super-fan and Gold is her favorite appraiser.

CHAPTER SUMMARY: Belle receives two phone calls. Rumford and David go out for “a couple beers”. RATING: T WORDS: 9,087 A/N: Big thank you to @whimsical36 for beta reading this chapter!♥  TMI’s for last chapter - [x]

Also: With this update, this story has officially hit the 100k mark! I wanna thank everyone for sticking with this story, because it's become my baby-- and it never would have happened if not for all of you guys' support! *blows kisses*

[Part One] [Part Two] [Part Three] [Part Four] [Part Five] [Part Six] [Part Seven] [Part Eight] [Part Nine] [Part Ten] [Part Eleven] [Part Twelve] [Part Thirteen] [Part Fourteen] [Read on AO3]

Belle shifted in bed as she finished reading her emails on her phone. It was well past time to get up and start the day, but since she was in no hurry to be anywhere this morning, she just rolled onto her back and switched to the gallery app instead.

She happily began skimming through the pictures from her weekend with Rumford, which included shots of the wares on display at the market, the things they had eaten, and views of the docks and the park. Rumford seemed to shy away from having his photo taken, but hadn’t refused when somebody offered to take their picture while they were walking along the docks Saturday evening.

It had come out quite well, Belle thought. The sun had just begun to set, she looked so happy with Rumford’s arm around her shoulders, and he looked so handsome with his pinstriped suit and boutonniere. She smiled and continued swiping, lingering on the handful of shots where she’d managed to capture glimpses of him– an arm, a shoulder, his back, a blurry figure in the distance. There were a few she’d taken at the soap vendor where he could be seen sniffing lotions and bars of soap, including one he must not have liked, judging by the funny look on his face. But then there was one of him smiling– or perhaps laughing– dimples and all, and she decided it was her favorite.

Her phone suddenly buzzed in her hand, the screen overtaken by an incoming call.

What a man, what a man, what a mighty good man! Say it again, now! What a man, what a man, what a mighty good– 

“Oh!” Belle gasped and scrambled to answer it, only to drop the phone onto her face. She sputtered and picked it back up, hoping she hadn’t accidentally answered it with her nose.

A call from Rumford!

Taking a deep breath, she tapped the screen and pressed the device to her ear. “Rumford?”

“Ah… Belle?”

Her insides did a little dance at the sound of his voice, and she squirmed under her sheets. “Hi, Rumford...”

“Hi.” he said, and oh! His voice was just so soft and gentle and sweet!

Belle bit into her lower lip. “...Hi.”

“I ah… well, you said I should give you a call once I made it back to Syracuse.”

“Oh, yeah!” she smiled and snuggled up against her pillows. “How was the drive?”

“Interminable.” he scoffed. “I ah… wouldn’t have minded some company.”

“I’d have happily kept you company if I could...” she said.

He let out a little chuckle, not seeming sure of what to say to that. “So ah… w-what are your plans for today?”

Belle blew out a long breath. “I have classes, but they don't start until two, so I get to sleep in.”

“Ah.” he chuckled. “You know, I tried to come into the shop on time at nine this morning, but ah… it seems my employees and my son have conspired to make sure I get some sleep after the trip, so… I just got out of bed myself.”

Fresh out of bed Rumford!

He probably had cute, matching pajamas, Belle thought– his eyes glazed and sleepy, and his hair mussed from the pillows…

“Sounds like they worry about you a lot,” she smiled, giddily tugging the covers up to her chin.

Rumford scoffed. “Aye, they do. Neal's always taken very good care of me– making sure I sleep, making sure I eat. And Ariel, she's… she's very sweet. Lovely young woman and a great worker. Don't know how I'd run the shop without her.”

“Well I'm glad you have people over there looking out for you.”

“Aye. Though I did manage to steal copies of the proposals Ariel worked on before she kicked me out, so… I may still get some work done yet.”

“Rumford!” Belle admonished. “You’re so bad…”

“Oh, I know.” he said. “But from what I've seen so far, they all look great. Haven't found a thing I'd change yet.”

“Can I ask what the proposals are for? Or is that… I don't know,” she shrugged, “confident–”

“Sure, sure.” he said. “The ah… biggest project is restoring a dining set from the 1860s. ‘Nother is repairing an old family Bible that was printed and bound in 1807.”

“Oh, wow.”

“And the others aren’t proposals, but insurance valuations. Got one for a collection of model trains. Quite impressive. Another for an old set of silverware, one for a stamp collection... and another for a few paintings from the Ashcan School.”

Belle rolled onto her belly. Propping her chin upon her fist, she let out a wistful sigh.

After a beat, Rumford smacked his lips. “Which ah… which classes have you got today?”

“Oh, uh... resources for children, and then my capstone.”

“Ah. Resources for children, what's that all about?”

“Um… basically how to develop a curriculum for an elementary school library. How to target the needs of children who are still learning to read, or still uh, developing their comprehension skills.”

“Oh.” Rumford chuckled. “And that's… y-you’d enjoy that, you think? Working with children?”

“Well, yeah!” Belle smiled, beginning to paddle her feet through the air. “I uh, I love kids.”

“Oh. That's… that's wonderful, sweetheart.”

Of course she loved kids!

She wanted to have some of her own one day!

Did Rumford want to have more kids? Because she'd totally have kids with him. Lots of them.

Well, like… three, tops, but still.

Or was it too soon to be thinking about having babies together?

No , Belle decided. That was silly!

She'd always known she wanted to have children. It was only natural, that if she was seeing somebody who gave her butterflies, and it was going well, that she'd daydream about a future with them! A future with babies! Cute, snuggly, precious, little babies with their tiny hands and tiny feet and tiny noses and tiny everything! So soft, and with pudgy cheeks, too!

“...Belle?”

Her feet stopped paddling. “Mhm?”

Rumford coughed. “Well, I-I just wanted to say that I ah… I had a lovely time last night. Th-the whole weekend, I mean.”

Belle nibbled her lip and snuggled her pillow a little more tightly. “...Me too.”

“I regret that I had to leave so soon, but…”

“I know.” she said, glancing toward the window. “You got work, I got work, school…”

“Aye.” he said. “But you know, I-I have to say it, Belle. You were... incredible last night.”

“Oh.” she giggled, feeling herself blush.

“It was a ah... honor, to see such a brilliant mind at work.”

“Well…” Belle fought back a smile, “the other members of the University Word Warriors club don’t call me the Bogglemeister for nothing.”

“...Quadricentennial.” he sighed. “Absolutely brilliant.”

“You weren't so bad yourself,” she murmured. “...Mr epistemologies.”

“No no–” he said. “Child's play compared to your schadenfreude. I-I'd never even considered playing loanwords before, Belle. You… reinvented the game for me, sweetheart. Truly.”

“Oh, I don't know about that…” she blushed, her legs swaying in the air again.

“Oh, but I do.” he crooned.

Belle nibbled her lip again and pressed her thighs together. “...Yeah?”

“I'll ah, never look at a Boggle grid the same way again.”

“You know, all this flattery will get you nowhere,” she teased. “Dr Gold.”

“No?” he asked. “Because so far it seems to be doing a great job of bringing that lovely blush to your face. Miss French.”

“Rumford!” she giggled. “What makes you think I'm blushing, hm?”

“Oh, I can tell.” he murmured. “I can hear it in your voice– sounds even sweeter than usual...”

A delighted little squeal escaped her, and Belle clamped a hand over her mouth.

“...what?” he asked.

“Well, if anyone would know what I sound like when I’m blushing, it’d be you…”

“O-oh?” he stammered, and the silken quality that had been in his voice was suddenly replaced with something shaky and uncertain. “I–”

“It’s hard not to blush whenever I’m talking with you, Rumford…” she spelled out for him.

“...Oh,” he chuckled. “Well… I’m afraid I’m the one who’s blushing now, sweetheart.”

*****

Ruby had just crawled out of bed and was headed to the kitchen when she heard giggling from Belle's bedroom. She paused and hovered outside the door, unable to resist the temptation to eavesdrop.

“Rumford…”

She couldn't make out much, or any of Dr Gold's half of the conversation for that matter, but they were definitely exchanging sweet little nothings.

Thank God, Ruby thought, continuing towards the kitchen. They finally boned.

She hadn't expected Dr Gold to still be in town, but she supposed she couldn't blame the guy, either. If there was any excuse for him to extend his stay in Storybrooke, being too worn out from a night of dancing the horizontal Mambo would be it.

A high-pitched squeal sounded from Belle's room, and Ruby smothered a laugh. The apartment had been completely quiet when she got home late last night, but it appeared a good night's sleep had the two lovebirds ready for another roll in the hay.

Once in the kitchen, Ruby prepared herself a big bowl of cereal and carried it (and the box) over to the couch – making sure she had a good view down the hall. Belle and Dr Gold was one walk of shame she wouldn't want to miss. And surely enough, within a few minutes, there was some movement down the hall and Belle's door creaked open.

Belle appeared, raising her arms up and letting out a big yawn. She had a little pep in her step as she came down the hall and into the kitchen.

“Hey there, peanut.” Ruby said behind a sly grin. “Ya have a good time last night?”

“Mhm!” Belle answered, opening the fridge.

“Looks like it.” she teased.

Belle plucked a cup of yogurt out of the fridge and spun around for the utensil drawer, grabbing a spoon before slamming it shut with a saucy sway of her hips. She had a big smile on her face she was clearly trying to be casual about– which was what Belle always did when she was dying to tell her something. But of course, in typical Belle fashion, she was just standing there, leaning against the counter, happily eating her yogurt like she was auditioning for a Yoplait commercial.

“So…” Ruby took the bait. “How was–”

“I showed Rumford my spreadsheet.” Belle volunteered.

“Oh, God.” Ruby dropped her spoon into her bowl and leveled her a look before remembering that whatever had happened last night, clearly went well. And naturally– she was curious. “...What did he say?”

“That it was a highly valuable set of data and incredibly helpful.” Belle said proudly, joining her on the couch. “...and then he um, called me sweetheart. Again.”

Ruby blinked. Of course they'd end up making foreplay out of the damn spreadsheet.

Should've expected it, honestly.

“Anyway, we ate dinner after that… he really seemed to enjoy the meatloaf by the way... and then we talked and cuddled right there…” Belle continued, looking fondly at the other end of the couch as she licked the yogurt off of her spoon. “And um, things may have gotten a little heated after that…”

Ruby flared her nostrils and tried not to fidget too noticeably where she sat.

They boned. On the couch. Where she was now sitting. Less than twelve hours later. Eating.

Hadn't she specifically begged her not to do it on the couch?

Belle sighed. “Rumford is such a good kisser, Rubes.” she said. “And he smells so good. Have you ever made out with someone who smells really good? Because it's like… you feel all hot and tingly from the things they're doing with their mouth, and then when you pull back to catch your breath, it's like BAM! Sexy smell!”

“Yeah. It's… something else…” Ruby nodded along, peering down the hall. Where was the man of the hour, anyway?

Belle glanced over her shoulder, spoon in her mouth, and frowned when she saw that nothing was there. “...What is it?”

“He takin’ a shower or something?”

Belle creased her brows. “What?”

Ruby shrugged. “Rumford.”

She shook her head. “He left the apartment at eleven or so last night. Had to leave really early this morning for Syracuse– It's like a six-hour drive, you know.”

“Oh. I just thought I heard…” Ruby trailed off.

“Heard what? We were on the phone.”

Ruby rolled her eyes and set her cereal bowl on the coffee table. Doing her best impression of Belle, she dropped her wrist and giggled, “Rumford!”

Belle’s eyes went wide and she huffed. “I don't sound like that!”

Ruby threw her head back and laughed. “Yeah, you do!”

“Do not!” Belle said, throwing the empty yogurt cup at her. It bounced off Ruby's arm and tumbled onto the floor.

“Around him? That is exactly what you sound like!”

“Yeah, well–” Belle began to protest, “...maybe Rumford happens to be really funny.” she said, lifting her chin.

Ruby shot her a skeptical look. “Is he, Belle?” she asked. “Is he really funny?”

Belle pursed her lips, refusing to look her in the eyes. “Okay, fine. Maybe he's just really cute and I like him a lot and can't help getting all giggly around him.” she admitted. “So what?”

“...Mhm.” Ruby grinned, picking her cereal bowl back up and continuing to munch away. “Nothing.”

“Come on,” Belle sighed. “You and Dorothy don't act giggly and cute around each other? Not even a little?”

“Nah.” Ruby swallowed. “But then again, I don't need to act cute. I just am, ” she shrugged. “I mean– look at me.”

Belle narrowed her eyes, trying not to laugh.

“So.” Ruby shoveled another spoonful of cereal into her mouth. “...How was it? Did he uh... give you full market value?” she asked, wiggling her brows.

Belle tilted her head. “Huh?”

“Oh, come on!” she whined. “Full market value! That was good!”

“...what?”

“Hang on.”

Ruby brought her bowl up to her lips and tilted her head back, slurping the milk down before setting it back on the coffee table.

“The sex!” she said, throwing her hands up in the air. “Did you guys finally bone or what?! I need to know! Did. My girl. Get. Laid. Did she ride that–”

“Oh!” Belle realized with a smile. “No.”

Ruby deflated in an instant. “What.”

“No. We uh, we didn't have sex.” she said, dusting some imaginary crumbs off her lap.

Ruby rubbed a hand over her face and groaned. “Christ, I'm starting to get blue balls here!” she said. “I don't even have balls, Belle!”

“I mean, we almost did…” she mumbled.

Ruby gestured impatiently for her to continue. “But…?”

Belle shrugged. “We just decided we aren't ready for that yet.”

“I mean–” Ruby huffed. “That's cool. And I respect that. But–” she trailed off and flapped her arms wildly in frustration.

Belle laughed. “We wound up playing Boggle instead. You know– he's quite good!”

“I'm… sure he is.” Ruby grumbled in defeat.

There was a sound then, coming from the bedroom.

“...Phone.” she said, nodding towards the hall.

Belle raised her brows. “What?”

“Your phone, peanut. Someone's calling you.”

“Oh.” she blinked and hopped off the couch. “ God, how can you hear that?” she asked, following the muffled melody to her bedroom.

Ruby shrugged. “We all have our gifts, Belle. Clairvoyance, supersonic hearing, mad Boggle chops…”

Belle rolled her eyes and disappeared into her room, returning a moment later with reluctant pout on her face.

“What's the matter?” Ruby snickered. “You look like somebody spilled coffee on your copy of Pride and Prejudice.”

“It's my dad.”

“Yeah, I figured.” she said, darting a pointed glance at Belle's phone, where it continued to blare Papa Don't Preach in her hand. “Your ringtones? A little on the nose. What does he want?”

Belle let out a deep sigh. “I don't know.”

*****

Every so often, Rumford would receive a call from David, inviting him out for a couple beers. Usually he'd find some excuse not to go– Working late tonight. Going in early tomorrow. Too many errands to run.

But when David called Tuesday, asking him to come out for a couple beers on Thursday, Rumford had been feeling a little saucy and said yes.

He knew just what the source of his newfound sauciness was, too.

It was no doubt the work of certain aspiring librarian in Maine. He and Belle had talked about so many things last weekend– the sort of things that emboldened a man, and made him feel more like he had a right to the space he occupied in the world. Like he had something to offer, something to give. That invitations to the pub from someone as likeable as David Nolan were born of a genuine desire to actually enjoy his company rather than being some reluctant act of pity.

Of course David Nolan wanted to hang out and have a couple beers with Rumford Gold!

Rumford Gold was sharp and witty! A good listener! Was maybe even a little handsome, depending on who you asked– though he'd prefer it if you asked Belle.

And so on Thursday night, Rumford drove up to one of the Irish pubs in town. To meet David. For a couple beers.

Not literally a couple beers– as he didn't drink beer and intended to order whisky instead– but figuratively a couple beers, as in heterosexual male bonding.

...Or was it just platonic male bonding?

When he and Jefferson used to go out, they didn't have to do so under the guise of some passive activity like drinking beer! They'd just say it: I haven't heard from you in a while. We should catch up.

At the very least, it would be I’d like to try that new restaurant that opened up. But even then, if they wanted to try the new restaurant that opened up, then they tried the new restaurant that opened up. Critiqued the menu, the decor, the lighting concept, how comfortable the chairs were.

Rumford had been on this earth long enough to know that when someone invited you out for a couple beers, their intentions were rarely so simple.

But maybe a couple beers wasn't a heterosexual thing so much as it was a “men who aren't attracted to each other” thing. Maybe two men who, while attracted to other men but not necessarily each other, also went out for a couple beers.

Rumford reached the pub’s front door and hesitated.

Was this what people meant when they said bisexuals were confused? Because he was definitely feeling confused right now. As confused as he was certain about his interest in men and women.

Should he tell David about his little discovery, he wondered?

It had felt liberating to tell Belle. Like a weight off of his shoulders. But now that he was back in Syracuse, the weight seemed to have crept back over him.

Maybe he shouldn't.

It seemed rather self-important, didn't it? Oh, let me just interrupt you for a second there to tell you that I like men.

Just... unprompted like that.

And what if David took it the wrong way? Thought he was confessing to being attracted to him? What if it made things weird?

It wasn't fair, was it? Nobody else had to work up the nerve to tell their friends and colleagues that they were heterosexual! People just assumed they were and there was never any need to correct them!

Rumford shook his head and finally stepped inside the dimly lit pub, doing his best to avoid eye contact with the hostess– to look like he knew where he was going because it was always uncomfortable when you were meeting somebody and couldn't find them. Then the hostess would try to offer you a table, and you had to explain to them that you didn't need their help finding a table– you just needed a few more seconds to adjust to how bloody dark it was in there so you could distinguish one shadowy figure at the bar from another.

Fortunately however, the hostess was preoccupied with taking a dinner reservation and it never became an issue. Rumford swept past her podium without having to endure so much as a gratuitous service smile!

Anyway, he'd want to tell Neal at some point, too. If there was anybody he wanted to completely be his true self around, it was his boy.

But what about somebody like Miss Halloran? Was it any of her business to know? It'd be nice if she knew, he supposed– they worked alongside each other every day at the shop after all. But still, he didn't feel like they had the kind of relationship that warranted a whole conversation about his sexuality.

Because what now? Would he just have to keep bringing it up again and again? With every person he grew close to? Where did one draw the line? Was he just supposed to spend the rest of his life explaining himself to people?

Bloody hell.

How exhausting!

“Gold?”

If only there was some way he could… broadcast that information, but on a low frequency. Something subtle that whispered, “bisexual,” to whomever was listening. He wouldn't be hiding it, but he wouldn't be making a big deal of it either. It’d just be there. Like any other clearly observable fact about him. Like his height, or his hair color, or the keen eye for aesthetics that frequently had ladies in department stores approaching him and asking his opinion while they shopped for their husbands.

A hand clapped over Rumford's shoulder and he startled.

“You alright there, man?” David asked.

Rumford blinked.

Jefferson never clapped him on the shoulder like that before either. He would gently touch his shoulder. Or brush his arm. Sometimes, when they were being brought to their table at a restaurant, he'd trail behind him, splaying a guiding hand over his back.

God, Rumford thought.

How oblivious was he?

“Aye. Just… dark in here, is all,” he said.

“Yeah, you can say that again,” David chuckled. “Got us a spot right here, buddy,” he said, pointing to a vacant spot at the bar.

Yes, Rumford thought as he followed David over.

His bisexuality wouldn't be a big deal unless someone else wanted to make it a big deal– in which case he could show them the door. After all, what did he have to lose? He was a grown man who owned a house in the historic district! It's not like his father could disown him!

Bastard already did that when he was eight years old!

Risk getting fired from his job? It was his business!

Lose customers? Please. Their work had been featured in Antiques Quarterly half a dozen times! The waiting list to get an appraisal with him was a month long! Restoration work– four!

Four months!

If half those people decided they didn't want their R & J Adam dinette chairs repaired by a man who liked men, what did he care!?

Fewer deadlines for him to worry about!

He’d probably sleep better!

What else was there...

Milah making insensitive remarks over dinner when she visited for the holidays?

She did that anyway!

“So, what's up?” David asked, seating himself on one of the barstools. “What's happenin’?”

Rumford stared at the empty stool beside him for a moment, determining how best to climb up without making a spectacle of himself. “Oh, nothing, nothing...” he dismissed. “Ah… how about you?”

“Good, good.” David nodded, leaning over the counter to flag down the bartender.

Rumford fidgeted into his seat, struggling to make himself as comfortable as was possible on a wooden bar stool. “That's… good.” he coughed.

The bartender wasted no time getting their orders, a small diversion for which Rumford was grateful.

“It's good to see you, buddy.” David said.

“Aye. …Good to see you too.” Rumford nodded.

Good.

Good, good, good.

Everything was good.

“We never really get to just hang out, you know?”

Rumford raised his brows, his mouth hanging open dumbly. “Ah… no. We don't, don't we?”

“Well, thanks for comin’ out.” David said.

Rumford's pulse thickened.

Coming out?

Did he know? Could he tell? Had everyone already known he was bisexual except him?

No, no, Rumford decided. He meant coming out literally. Coming out physically.

“...aye.” he said, relaxing a little. “Of course.”

The bartender, absolute godsend that she was, set their drinks in front of them then, and Rumford didn't hesitate to take a sip from his glass.

Well, two sips.

David took a hefty swig of his beer and let out a refreshed sigh. “We should do this more often, you know?”

Rumford huffed a little laugh through his nose.

Should they? Because it'd only been five minutes and he already wanted to go home.

He took another sip. “Aye. For sure.”

At this point, Jefferson would have remarked on how disappointing and uninspired the latest blockbuster films were, or how heartbroken he was to have just finished a novel he'd been enjoying so terribly much. He might have shared an amusing anecdote about one of his students, which would've reminded Rumford of a story about a particularly difficult customer they'd had at the shop.

Oh, he and Jefferson would have each other in stitches, wouldn't they? And then as they settled down and caught their breath, their eyes would meet, and...

Rumford cleared his throat and took another sip, ignoring the warm sensation in his chest.

“How ah… how was the game?” he asked. Because there was always a game.

“Good,” David nodded, “Blue Jays just secured themselves a spot in the World Series, so I'm happy about that.”

Rumford gave a tight-lipped smile. “That's… wonderful.”

He took another swig and frowned. “You sure you're alright, buddy? You seem…”

“No.” Rumford shook his head. “Just... thinking.” About how gay I am.

“Something on your mind?”

“Ah…” he floundered, trying to think of something. Anything but the conversation he wanted but didn't feel quite ready to have.

“Ye know, we got this chair in,” he settled with. “An old Chippendale. And the right back leg ? Completely snapped at the joint.”

“Oh.” David scowled. “Sounds like you got your work cut out for you.”

Work. Always a safe topic.

“Aye. Hell with the hide glue, I'm gonnae need to use some epoxy.” Rumford said, hiking his brows emphatically.

“Is it mahogany? Walnut?” David asked. “‘Cause I've got a bunch of scrap lying around, if you think you'll need to carve in and reinforce that.”

“Aye. Aye, for sure. That'd be great.”

“Yeah, whatever you need. And hey– if you think you'll need some power tools, you could just bring it over to the workshop. Mi casa es su casa , alright?”

Rumford frowned.

“...What?” David asked.

He scoffed and rolled his eyes. “I haven't touched a power tool in years.”

“So? I'm sure you've still got it, man.” David said, giving his shoulder a shove– and what was with all the shoving!? And the smacking? His poor shoulder was going to dislocate if he kept on with that!

“I dunno. I… I think it might be time for me to start turning away jobs like this,” Rumford chuckled. “Jewelry, watch repair? Sure. But no more of this... carpentry.”

“Hey now– the work you did on that Sheraton side chair a few years back was a master class. ” David said, wagging his bottle at him. “Thing looked brand new.”

“Well, I-I appreciate that, but…”

“But what?”

Time for another sip. “...I dunno.”

“Well, I'm just saying.” David said. “Come by the workshop sometime, play with the jointer and the table saw, and tell me you don't miss it.”

"Eh…” Rumford hesitated. "I'll consider it.”

He didn't necessarily miss the work. It's just that that kind of work involved things like safety gear, and… wearing blue jeans.

David set his beer down with a heavy sigh. “Alright. So, I gotta be honest,” he said. “There's uh… there's a reason I called you out here.”

Rumford furrowed his brows. Swallowed hard.

I gotta be honest? There's a reason I called you out here?

Had more terrifying words ever been spoken?

“You see, I got this thing I was kinda hoping you could give me some advice, some perspective, on.”

Rumford pouted and started blankly ahead. What could David Nolan possibly need his advice on? Picking out anniversary gifts, hopefully. He was good at that. Customers at the shop were always looking for something a little off the beaten path there. Or perhaps planning an outfit. Or the best approach for appraising something. Or–

“It's about Emma.” David explained.

“Oh.” Rumford smiled and turned to face him a little better, because that was another matter entirely! “What is it?”

“Well…” he stared ahead for a moment and sighed. “She's going to be doing all these after school programs this year, and so Mary Margaret and I decided to get her a cell phone.”

“A cell phone?” Rumford scoffed. “She's nine years old! Neal didn't get one until he got his driver's license last year!”

“I know! It seems crazy,” David laughed. “But we talked about it, and we agreed we wanted to have a way for us to reach each other, no matter what. Because in this world, who knows what could happen, right?”

“Aye, I suppose…” Rumford said.

“But here's the thing: Phones these days, you know, they aren't just phones anymore.”

“Oh, tell me about it.” he agreed.

“I mean, it's crazy!” David said. “They can take pictures and send pictures and go online and talk to strangers and– it's scary.”

“It is.”

“So Mary Margaret found out about this software that lets you monitor everything they do on their phone. And I mean everything. And she seems really gung-ho about it, but it just…”

“Feels wrong.”

“Invasive. Yeah.” David said. “I mean, we do everything on our phones these days. But when I was a kid, we didn't have cell phones! It was like, you and your buddies rode your bikes and hung out at the baseball fields, and everything was fine as long as you were home before dark, you know?

Rumford hesitated.

Friends?

Bicycle rides with one's buddies?

Baseball?

“ ...Aye.”

“And look, there's plenty of stupid stuff my friends and I said and did in those days that my mom never knew about. That I still wouldn't want her to know about. But it was just harmless fun, you know? We all turned out fine and stayed out of trouble.”

“For sure, for sure.”

“So I mean… the fancy phones… are they not just… this generation's baseball field?” David said. “I mean, Emma's nine now, but in a few years… well, when does it stop? Where do we draw the line? What happens when she starts liking boys? Are we–”

“Or girls.” Rumford chimed in. “...Or both.”

David pinned him with an odd look. Not surprise or disgust, but something unreadable.

Rumford looked down at his glass and smacked his lips. “...You never know.”

“Right?” David said. “It just feels like something out of an Orwell novel, is what I'm saying.”

“I understand.”

“So… I don't know what to do. I want to protect our daughter from all the ugly in the world, but… she should still have the right to her privacy. And the right to just… be a kid and make her own mistakes and learn from them.” he sighed. “You did a good job with Neal. What would you do?”

“Ah…”

What would he do?

What would Barbara Rumford Gold do?

“I… ah… Well, it… The thing–” he cut himself off with a sigh.

David was listening so attentively, with eyes so wide, so gleaming, so earnest– and he really didn't want to botch this up!

He'd given good advice to Belle though, hadn't he? And her father?

That was different, though. Neither of them had asked for advice. They'd just said something that prompted him to speak from his own experience!

Rumford rubbed a hand over his mouth.

Oh.

Yes.

Life experience and all that.

“My ah… da always wanted to know everything.” he finally said, and David leaned in a little closer.

“He was always watching and demanding to know what I was doing, or reading. Who I talked to at school, if I had touched any of his things while I was gone, just… everything. He'd notice something wasn't quite right in the flat, and it was always my fault, and he'd get so angry and–”

Well, perhaps it wasn’t necessary to go into quite so much detail.

“I was walking on eggshells all the time,” he went with, “and I… I hated this feeling that nothing was just mine. And I don't just mean material things, but– well, the more he demanded to know, the more determined I was to keep things from him, you know? Not with any sort of malicious intent, but just so that I could have something.”

David pressed his lips together and nodded. “Yeah, I see what you mean.”

“So I knew I didn't want Neal to feel that way, not ever.” Rumford said. “The thing is, for me… being a parent… it's not my job to make Neal's choices for him. It's… teaching him how to make his own, you know? I mean, he really cocks things up from time to time, but we all do. That doesn't make him a bad kid. But the important thing, is that he should know that no matter what, he can come to me and expect me to help him through whatever's he got on.”

“Absolutely.”

He swirled his finger through the condensation on his glass and smiled. “Two, three years ago, I get a phone call. I answer, and it's Neal calling from a friend's phone, and he goes, ‘Pop. We fucked up.’ ”

David huffed out a laugh.

“Turns out he and his friends had stolen the keys to their parents car and taken it for a joyride. Big pickup truck, with the four wheel drive, and they decided to take it off-road. It had been raining though, and they lost control and swerved straight into a damn tree.”

“Ouch.”

“And I was… so disappointed, because I knew he knew better than that, you know?”

“We usually do, don't we?” David chuckled.

“...Aye.” Rumford agreed, hiking his brows. “So I hop in the car and drive out to them, and they're fine, thank God. Neal can hardly look me in the eyes of course– he knows what he's done. But then his friends are practically grovelling at my feet, ‘please don't make us call our parents!’ which... they'd mangled the fender on the bloody thing, there wasn't any other way about it– but I was glad to know that when my son found himself in that situation, he felt that he could call me. That he wasn’t afraid to call me. Because he didn't have to, you know? It wasn't my car, they swore up and down that he hadn't been the one driving, none of them had gotten hurt save for a few nasty bruises... He could've kept it from me. Easily. But as horrible as the circumstances were, I was glad to know that at some point, the three of them were pacing around, scared, not knowing what to do, and that my son went, 'I know: let me call my da. He'll know what to do.’”

David sat quietly with the corners of his mouth pinched. “...That had to be terrifying, though.” he finally said, his eyes fixed on the wall.

Rumford tapped a finger on his glass, thinking of what to say. It had been terrifying, and if there was any chance that he could go back and ensure it had never happened, he’d no doubt that he’d take it.

“I think… it's easy to be scared, to get angry in those situations.” he said. “But if there are children who respond well to that, I can tell you Neal was never one of them. I learned that I've got to bite my tongue where that's concerned. Try to be calm about it when I tell him he needs to be more careful, that what if they hadn't been so lucky and they'd gotten seriously hurt– or worse. Because all the times I panicked and lashed out at him, I could see it in his eyes, the same resentment I would have toward my da. That urge to pull further away.”

David rubbed a hand over his face and sighed. “Do you ever regret not knowing what they were up to though? Before it was too late, I mean.” he said. “Because like you said, what if they weren't so lucky?”

“Of course you do.” Rumford admitted. “But… the more they know you're watching, the better they get at hiding those things, you know? I know I did. And it took years after my da left for me to… unlearn that.” he said. “At the end of the day, you’ve got to trust them. And hear me when I say that they’ll violate that trust. Likely more than once. But if you can’t give them your trust to begin with, they’ll never understand the value of it, and they’ll never want to work to repair it.”

David released another slow, heavy breath and hiked his brows.

“It’s… not easy,” Rumford chuckled, hoping to lighten the mood.

“No, you’re right.” he agreed. He gently drummed his hands over the bartop, and looked at Rumford with a tight-lipped smile. “Thanks, man. I’ll uh, think about that.”

Rumford smiled back and nodded. “Aye. Of course.”

“So, speaking of kids…” David grinned, leaning back in his seat. “You ready to be an empty nester?”

Rumford slouched his shoulders. “I'm… excited for him.”

“He's a good kid.” David offered. “I don't think you have anything to worry about.”

Rumford scoffed.

Worried about Neal? Ha! He wasn't worried about Neal! Neal was a smart boy! With a good head on his shoulders!

No, no! He was worried about himself!

Coming home to an empty house! Not having anyone to nag about leaving dishes in the sink or laundry in the dryer! Not having anyone's profanity to correct! Not having a messy bedroom that called his name every time he walked by, luring him to come in and tidy up– just a little bit!

Because when you took all of those things away, what was there left to be grumpy about!?

Dust bunnies?

There was a pathetic thought.

Rumford Gold. Home alone with nothing but his dusty trinkets to keep him company.

It made a heavy feeling settle in his stomach, and he frowned at his glass.

“Hey, man.” David said, putting a hand in his shoulder. “You’ll be alright. Now you get to… relax. Focus on you.”

Rumford nodded, but his frown stayed in place.

That's what they said, the other parents. How ‘done’ they were, and how now they would finally have the time to rekindle their marriages, or make that career change, or retire, or start that side business they'd always dreamt of.

But he didn't have a marriage to rekindle! He was happy with his work and he was proud of his shop! And above all else, he didn't feel ‘done’ with kids! He loved being a Papa and he couldn't shake this feeling that he had more of that in him!

And so he'd just nod along and smile, ignoring the hollow feeling in his heart. Pretending he didn't feel like something was missing.

“You know…” David said, setting a hand on his shoulder, “I really do consider you a friend, Rum.”

Rumford sighed and stared down at the bartop.

“I know Neal leaving for college is gonna be hard, or maybe just weird for you, but– well, if you ever wanna talk about it, I'm all ears.” he said. “‘Cause I know you'd do the same for me. Because, well, in a lot of ways, you're... kind of like the dad I never had.”

Rumford looked up at him and cocked his head to the side, at a loss for words.

David smiled. “I mean, I had a dad, but… you’re like… a second dad. Or a really close uncle, or–” he cut himself off and shook his head. “Point is, when I have stuff I can't talk to anyone else about– the kind of stuff I wish I could talk to my dad about– I know I can come to you.”

Rumford could feel the beginning of tears coming on, and blinked them away. “I– Thank you.” he whispered and nodded.. “That… thank you.”

David gave him a tight-lipped smile.

“You're… sort of like a son to me,” Rumford managed with an uncertain shrug. “Sometimes?”

Because while yes, he did have a special fondness for David, it just wasn't the same. Mentor and mentee, surely. But father and son? That felt a bit of a stretch.

David seemed to pick up on his uncertainty and looked away, taking a quick swig of his beer. “You don’t have to– it's alright, I understand.”

“I… appreciate that, though.” Rumford said. “Truly. Thank you.”

“Well, however you choose to look at it.” David chuckled, “I'm glad we're friends.”

Friends.

He and David were friends.

A certain feeling overcame him, and Rumford hesitated. But after a beat, he turned toward David– toward his friend – and clapped his hand on his shoulder, giving it a little squeeze. “Me too.”

His hand lingered there for a moment, and what was an appropriate length of time to be touching someone’s shoulder like this, anyway?

He released his grip and let his hand drop down, making a point to not snap it away too quickly nor drag it away too slowly.

“Anyway–” David coughed, “how uh… how are things with Belle? You guys still seeing each other?”

“Yeah.” Rumford nodded and cleared his throat, folding his arms over the bartop. “Yeah, we're still… seeing each other. As much as we can, at least.”

Time for another sip.

David motioned for the bartender. “And how's that working out?”

“Good…” he mumbled. “I think.”

“You think?” David chuckled. “Well, do you like spending time with her?”

Rumford rolled his eyes. “Of course I do!”

“The distance is pretty tough though, huh?”

Rumford bobbed his head from side to side for a moment. “It's… not ideal.” he admitted. “But… we still talk, exchange letters.”

David raised his brows. “Letters? As in– snail mail?”

“Why?” he shot back defensively. “What's wrong with that?”

“Nothing! Nothing.” he said. “Just–”

“We... like the personal touch.” Rumford said, his voice sounding far too high in pitch for his liking. “And having something physical–”

“No, I get it.” David assured. “It sounds really romantic.”

Rumford took a deep breath, easing his posture.

Damned right, he thought. He was an utterly romantic fool! He could admit that to himself! Just not out loud.

“I visited her, last weekend.” Rumford said. “It was… nice. We… we had a lovely time together.”

“You don't seem… too enthusiastic.” David observed.

“No, it's fine.” he shrugged.

“You sure?” David grinned. “Because a month ago, you were waxing poetic about this woman over the phone to me. Something about... the first day of spring?”

Rumford scowled. He'd almost successfully forgotten about that conversation.

“Like I said. If you got something on your mind, man, you can tell me.”

Rumford glanced around the bar for a moment, doing his best to stall until the bartender returned with their drinks.

“Can I– I know you said– and if I'm crossing a line, please.” Rumford stammered, and at last his glass was set down in front of him. “But I-I-I have a question.” he finished, and rushed to take a heavy swig.

David raised a brow. “Okay…”

“About, well, the…” Rumford shifted closer and lowered his voice to a whisper, ignoring the tightness in his chest. “The other other thing.” he said. “The bees.”

“Oh.” David's eyes went wide, despite how hard he was clearly trying not to let them. “What about the uh, bees?”

God, how did he ever think this was a good idea? For even a fraction of a second?

But it was too late now. He'd already said the word. Bees.

“Just– it– well, Belle and I.” Rumford said. “W-we had dinner at her place, and then we were on the couch and we were talking… and the talking turned into cuddling and the cuddling turned into kissing and– well, then she… made her intentions clear.” he whispered. “That she… wanted to… have her flower pollin–”

“Okay!” David interrupted, slamming his bottle down to cut him off. “You know, you don't have to use the euphemism, it's… just...”

“Oh.” he drew back and looked away. “I'm sorry, I–”

“Just, sex.” David said. “You can say sex. She wanted to have sex.”

“Yes.” Rumford exhaled and coughed. “Sex. Sexual… intercourse.”

Now that he said the word, it didn't seem so bad, did it? Sex, sex, sex. Sexy sex. Sexual sexiness. Just a bisexual man talking about his sex life with his sexy girlfriend.

“So… I take it you didn't want to?”

“Well– not exactly.” Rumford shrugged. “I mean, Belle's… stunning. With gorgeous, sexy eyes, and legs that go on for–”

“Rum–”

“–and she does this thing where she bites her lip that makes–”

“Alright.” David chuckled uncomfortably and held up his hand, signaling for him to stop. “Got it, got it. She's uh… she's hot.”

Rumford scoffed. “Now, there's an understatement. Everything about her just–”

David cleared his throat pointedly. “You said you had a question?”

“Right. Yes.” he coughed. Tossing a quick glance over his shoulder, he leaned in closely again. “Is it… normal? These days? To… well, to make love without… having said the words?”

David set his bottle down and leaned back in his seat, letting out a deep sigh.

That couldn't have been a good sign.

He blinked and raised his brows. “I mean, sure.” he shrugged, gesturing limply with his hand. “Plenty of people have sex without being in love first.”

“Because I… I wanted to, but– well, it felt wrong.”

David looked at him with furrowed brows. “Rum, she didn't… pressure you into any–”

“No! Heaven's no!” Rumford said. “I told her I wasn’t ready and we played Boggle instead!”

“Oh,” he relaxed. “Thank God.”

“God! What sort of woman do you think Belle is!?”

“Nothing! Nothing! I'm sure she's wonderful,” David said. “Just– looking out for you, man.”

“Oh. Well…” Rumford swallowed. “Thank you.”

David chugged his beer down to the label and set it down with a sigh. “So let me get this straight– she was ready to, and you were… interested . But you decided you'd rather wait?”

“Aye. But–” Rumford tilted his head from side to side in hesitation. “I don't know! It's just that the last woman I– the only person I was ever with was my ex-wife.” he confessed– and by God, did it sound embarrassing when he said it out loud like that.

David gave him a small, sympathetic smile. “And you're not sure if you're ready to share that with another person?”

“Eh… it's not quite that, I don't think.” Rumford dismissed, shaking his head. “It's just... I like Belle! A lot! I'd like to… be intimate with her. It's certainly been long enough for me that I think I'm ready to do that again. But isn't it too soon? For us? Or am I being too old-fashioned?” he asked. “Because I-I always felt… it should be about love, you know? Showing how you feel. And I know I have feelings for Belle. Good, strong feelings. But Milah and I knew each other for almost a year before we– I met Belle little more than a month ago.”

“Alright. Look, Rum.” David said, making a decisive gesture with his hand. “Whether you want to wait or not, or how long you wait, is up to you. Be it after x amount of dates or months, or until however long it takes to say you love each other, until you’re married, or whatever. There's no wrong choice there. But sex doesn't always have to be about… making love. It can just be about... having fun and making each other feel good. Or something in-between. The important thing is that you're both on the same page about it.”

Rumford let out a heavy sigh. “Ah suppose.”

“Just… honesty, man. Communication. Talk to her about it.”

“Talk to her.” Rumford muttered.

It seemed talking was David's solution for everything!

But talking was hard! At least, the kind of talking he was referring to– the kind that involved being vulnerable! It was so much easier to just flirt and make Belle smile and blush and giggle!

Because the more Belle knew about him, the more likely it was that she'd… realize how boring he was, and leave him for somebody more sexy and exciting. Like the roofer.

Rumford tapped a finger on his glass and sighed. “I don't think it's just that though. Th-the sex, I mean.”

David paused, his bottle hovering a inch from his lips. “No?”

“You know… what if it doesn't work out?”

He set his beer down and tilted his head at him.

“Being with Belle.” Rumford said. “I-it's made me realize how much I missed… having someone, you know? But I'm forty-five years old. I'm no’ getting any younger. If I'm gonnae… see somebody, I want to know that they're…”

Interested in getting married and having children?

Growing old and grey together?

Never going to leave me?

“...Looking for something serious?” David offered.

“Aye.”

Looking for something serious. That was good! That sounded far less pathetic!

Rumford cleared his throat. “We were talking on the phone Monday, and she mentioned that she loved kids and it hit me, you know? I know I want to have more kids but what about her? What if she doesn't?”

“I don't understand. You just said she told you she loves kids.”

“Aye, but liking kids and wanting to have your own are very different things. I-it just seems like we ought to talk about those things, doesn't it?”

“Eh…” David hesitated.

“Or is it too soon to talk about that? Because what we have so far is… it's nice. And I don't wannae scare her away by bringing those things up, but…”

“You're worried she just wants something casual and that you're heading towards a dead-end?”

Rumford nodded. “I can't do casual, David. I don't want casual. I don't even know what that means!” he said, looking around the bar helplessly. “It sounds sad!”

“Hey, now. Relax.” David said, setting a hand on his arm to ground him.

“I never should have gone on that first date with her,” Rumford sighed. “Then I wouldn't be in this mess with all these feelings, David.”

“No, don't say that.” he said. “The way I see it? If it's not too soon for you to be worrying about those things, it's not too soon for you to talk about them with her. It's a conversation every new relationship needs to have at some point, what the expectations are.”

Rumford looked at him with a pained expression.

Was it?

He and Milah had never really had that conversation. They’d studied together, fallen into bed a few times, and next thing he knew she was carrying his child and they were getting married.

How did one have that conversation, anyway? The thought of asking Belle if they were serious or not was nauseating! After all, what if she said no? It wasn't like there was a subtle, approachable way to say, I think I'm falling in love with you– but before you say anything, you should also know that I want to have more children someday and if you're not down with that, then we should just quit while we're ahead.

“Just be open about it.” David said. “It's uncomfortable and it'll be tempting to be as brief as possible, but take her through your thought process. All of it. From the… sex, to the… you know. Other, big picture stuff.”

“But what if she–”

“Look. I can't promise you how she'll react,” David said. “Maybe she'll decide she's not ready for all that and break things off. Or maybe she feels the same way and she'll be relieved. But if it's something you know you want, avoiding that conversation would just be torturing yourself.”

His mouth flopped open and closed. “I should at least wait though, right? I-I mean–”

“OK. Then wait how long?” David asked. He inched into his space, and Rumford couldn't help shrinking in his seat a little. “A month? Two months? Three? Let it fester for six? ...A year?”

Yes! Festering for a year sounded perfect!

“Trust me.” David said, giving him a pat on the back. “Best to just nip these things in the bud.”

Rumford grumbled and looked away. Damn David. Always being so… sensible about things.

“So, you'll tell her?”

He looked at his glass and let out a huff of resignation. “I'll… try.”

David shrugged. “You deserve to be happy, man, is all I'm saying. You know what you want– you shouldn't have to hide or apologize for it.”

Rumford rubbed a hand over his mouth.

Wanting things and not apologizing for the inevitable burden those foolish desires place on the people around you?

People did that?

But how?

It certainly made things seem so much more simple, he had to admit.

Why did you do that? Why are you telling me this?

Because I bloody well wanted to, that's why!

Rumford scoffed.

Of course! So simple!

He smiled and gave David's hand a few pats. “Thank you.” he finally said. “For… listening. To all of that.”

“Sure thing.” David winked. “Any time.”

“Well–” Rumford hopped out of his chair. “David. It's been lovely, we should most certainly do this again... but I think I'd like to take the rest of the evening to reflect privately on the matters discussed.”

“Oh.” David blinked. “O-okay.”

“Have a wonderful evening, and give Emma and Mary Margaret my regards.” he said, straightening his jacket and spinning on his heels toward the door.

“Gold, wait–”

Rumford froze and looked over his shoulder, brows raised expectantly.

David shook his head and laughed. “You gotta pay your bill, man.”

[islandpcosjourney]

Day 28 – May ’22 challenge

5th June

Now obviously I haven’t completed 28 days this time around 🤷🏻‍♀️ I broke my food-fast on Day 26 and again today for a family BBQ – life happens! I’ve allowed the “slips”, accounted for them, and built them into my way forward.

My plan is to continue juicing mid-week and eating what I choose at the weekends. It should be pretty sustainable. I might even do full juicing until my op (another 16 days) as I want to be in as best a shape as I can be for the op.

I already feel pretty good. My confidence level in myself has definitely increased. I can’t stop thinking about what a good day Friday was. I’m so pleased I did it. I’m so pleased it’s sparked an interest inside me. That I’m feeling good about being out/in the water again, is a total surprise to me.

I’m already making plans to be going out paddle-boarding again, soon! So, I went looking for Kevin’s wetsuit as I’ve never put one on before and I eventually would like to get one, when I’m more of a stable size. So, rather than buying one to fit me now and having to downsize next year, I thought I’d try Kevin’s on and see if it was even possible to wear. Before now, I was scared to even try it on because I knew I was bigger than him and it wouldn’t fit! But not trying it on, meant that it wasn’t confirmed that I was a fat so-and-so 😂 It’s hard at the best of times to compare a female to a male body – we are different shapes after all. However, a recent wardrobe/washing malfunction led me to believe that I had got to the point where I was now smaller than Kevin, overall. A pair of straight legged jeans (size 18) which I now use as pair of lounging jeans and an easy on/off loose bottom half when I go for a massage, had been in the wash and came back upstairs when they were dry. Somehow, they ended up at Kevin’s side of the bedroom and he put them on one day. They fit him perfectly and they actually looked really good on him, until he put his phone in the pocket and it didn’t fit – so he instantly knew they weren’t his jeans 😂 He’s running out of non-holey/ripped jeans at the moment which he can wear out-out and I tried to say he was welcome to them but he didn’t want to know when his oversized phone didn’t fit anyway 🤷🏻‍♀️ his loss.

However, that must’ve triggered me to realise that as they’re loose on me but fit Kevin, perhaps I’m smaller than him now? Yay – another “goal” reached 🤪 I still look in the mirror and see the rounded version of me from 2+ yrs. ago but I KNOW this isn’t the truth. So, I went in search of his wetsuit to prove that to myself. Something I knew wouldn’t fit me before, but suspect would fit me now. I was happy to find out I was right! I was not happy to find a spider had set up camp on the outside of it 🥴 Apart from it being too long as it’s a man’s wetsuit, to fit a 6ft4 Kev, and it is big generally on the torso (but is able to go round my bust!) it goes on me and I’m sure would work to keep me warmer than leggings if I wanted to go in the water with it on. I can turn up the legs so they’re more fitting around my ankles. For all that I might need one this summer, it’s worth a try before I invest in one next year. This is major progress for me – I’m considering wearing a wetsuit?! I never thought I’d think that let alone do it.

So, at the end of this challenge, I’ve achieved something I didn’t set out to achieve and I’ve perhaps not met some of the other goals BUT it doesn’t matter. It’s all a step in the right direction. It’s all part of the longer-term journey. It’s all a work in progress. Rome wasn’t built in a day. My health was many years in the decline so it may take more than 2 years in its restoration. I’m prepared to accept that now. It’ll take as long as it takes. There’s no point in trying to fast-track it by forcing it as all I’m doing in the process is slowing it down. Ahead of me is a period of 2 months with a new job, a completely new experience and therefore, a new chance to focus on what is important. Long may this lease of healthy life continue! You may not hear from me for a while now – but no promises!

[modernistestates]

Modernist Restoration A Span flat in Parkleys, Ham  Part five—the final instalment 

It’s been six months since I last visited Mem Morrison and Mehmet Fevzi—where has the year gone?!  So, long overdue, I paid them a visit last weekend to see their completed restoration, which looks fantastic—but having gone through the pain of doing up my own flat over the last few years (albeit single handedly, and often a bit bodged in a ‘I’m sure I can do that myself, I’ll give it a go’ manner) I wanted to see if things had gone to plan… 

It’s been a year since you bought the flat and moved in. Can you remind me what your plans for it were? MF:  Everything needed doing! We wanted to work with the original architecture, but we needed a new floor, there was no heating — so we wanted underfloor heating throughout, new electrics, new bathroom, plastering, to restore the kitchen and the original screen between the kitchen and living room. Everything!

Talk me through the process of how you got to here… MF: We moved in at the end of May in 2017 and spent three months prepping —stripping all the wood-chip wallpaper, the oil based paint off the walls which took hours and hours… that sort of thing. 

MM: We also did a lot of planning, we lived in the space first to find out how it functions. We also looked into the Parkleys archive at the original photos, although we didn’t want to replicate what was here originally and make it feel like the Geoffry Museum, it was good inspiration. We moved out in August for three months and stayed at our parents whilst the main work was being done. 

And who did you get to do the work, did you find it easy to find people who were sympathetic to the architecture? MM: It was difficult to find good contractors that were affordable. I think some take advantage. Span flats have become more popular in recent years, and some contractors see pound signs if they know of the architecture and presume you are willing to spend a premium to restore it. We were quoted an outrageous amount of money for new replacement doors for example. 

MF: On the other hand most contractors don’t get it. They make crazy suggestions such as putting plug sockets in ridiculous places, and that makes you feel really nervous.

So how did you find the right people to do the work? MM: We had some quotes from three companies or so who were recommended, although we only saw the work one, but they were too expensive, so we went with somebody else. We were originally going to have one contractor do everything, but in the end we decided to subcontract the floor to a specialist.

That’s different to how you have worked in the past, where you have selected different tradespeople and managed the project yourself, how did it compare? MF: When you go with one company you feel like someone is driving a truck really fast and you can’t stop it. With different tradespeople you are more in control. We had a number of challenges with the contractors and Mem had to step in a number of times.

You mentioned trenches were dug out of the floors for the electrics, why was that? MF: Rewiring properties of this age is quite tricky. The ceilings are all concrete so they couldn’t make channels into that. They tried to use the old conduit in the walls, but they couldn’t for one reason or another, so their solution was to run it in the floor, which was a bit weird… but we didn’t want exposed trunking everywhere…

Were there any other challenges? MM: The new bathroom was an absolute headache.

MF: It was ‘very complex’ for the plumber [laughs]. Even though we didn’t move anything, the loo was where the loo was, the sink is where the sink was etc. But we wanted ‘crazy’ things like wall hung toilets and a shower cubicle. 

So you moved back in three months later, which doesn’t sound that long considering the amount of work, how did you feel moving back in and what still needed doing? MF: It was really tough. We were living out of boxes, and even though we had a lovely new floor and all the walls were plastered I felt really overwhelmed. It all still need decorating, which sounds straightforward, but before you can do that, you need to do all the preparation — such as sanding and stripping —which is a lot of work. So even though the big work was done, the restoration was only just about to begin. 

Has this been your toughest project? MF/MM: Yes!

Why do you think that is? MF: We subcontracted the floor out to a specialist and the communication from them really bad. They underestimated how long it would take and that had knock on effects with the other contractors. In the future I think we would either go with one contractor, or manage the various tradespeople ourselves. Doing a bit of both doesn’t really work. The main challenge, however, was the sheer amount of work due to all the original details of the flat that we wanted to restore. For example, the wooden  kitchen sink drainer took us weeks to sand down. We had to keep coming back to it.

MM: It’s definitely a lot easier just to rip everything out and start from scratch but that’s not what we wanted. We loved this flat because of all the details, so even though it took a long time I got great pleasure from simple things like getting a piece of wire wool and rubbing down the original door handles. We did the kitchen up first, and although it’s the smallest, it took the longest and was the hardest. It was really satisfying though, and as soon as that was completed it gave us a benchmark for the rest of the flat. A lot of the original kitchens in Parkleys have been lost over the years, so we felt a real obligation to restore it properly. 

Sow how long has the restoration part of the project taken, and have you enjoyed it? MF: Six months. And yes, as soon as you start to put white paint on the walls suddenly your motivation kicks in and you begin to see things taking shape. 

Did you discover anything about the flat that you didn’t know about? We found the original wallpaper in the hallway, which is featured in some of the original RIBA photographs of Parkleys. 

Do you think living in a flat that was designed 60 years ago still functions for the way we live today? MM: It functions really well for us. You sacrifice on some things, like a modern kitchen, but then again we have the original larder, which we have never had before and that’s great. 

MF: I think the amount of storage is a bit of a challenge. 

What’s been your biggest success? MM: The kitchen. Most people have filled the entire kitchen with units, but we decided to put in a little table in there, as originally intended, and it’s a really cosy place to eat. In the morning you get a lot of light coming in and it’s fantastic.

MF: For me it’s the screen between the kitchen and living space. I love the original wood. 

So is this your last project? MF: [Laughs] It certainly is for now!

MM: We are exhausted! But my big plan is to build our own house one day. 

(Read Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, and Part 4)

[eclecticpatrolsweets]

Vanishing hand

When Ichiro Takayama came to China, he loved Chinese food, different cuisines and various cooking methods, which brightened his eyes and made his taste buds enjoy it very much.He is familiar with his own food culture. He will still feel that the food culture of Dahe nationality is long-term, and cooked food has a lot of fun.Although he didn't have the taste of fresh rice, he was very satisfied with eating rice.He loves rice. Japanese food is too expensive. Fish is eaten every day, but one day he is tired of eating. Chinese food is rich and cheap. He would rather live here forever than go back.Some of his Chinese classmates have returned to the motherland. Taking this opportunity, he wants to catch up with his classmates and visit what they say about China's rise?

The whole world envies China's rise and wants to know the difference between the Chinese dream and the American dream. They want to know China and why their country is poor, but China is rich in material resources.They can't figure it out. He can't figure it out.After working for two years, he didn't make any money. Although he converted it into RMB, it was more than 10000 yuan a month, but the food in Japan was too expensive, the house was too expensive, and everything was too expensive. He was a typical poor man.Say that the house is thousands of yuan, there is only one bedroom, a real snail's house.He also needs to take the subway to work. His time is wasted on transportation. He has to work overtime every night. He feels very tired.He felt hopeless. Working overtime was very serious. He had to be busy until 9:10 every day to go home. It was early in the morning after he got home. He hurried to have a good sleep. He still got up early the next day. When was the weekend? Which group of people won the holiday with their own resistance? It seems that they don't pay much attention in Japan.He has no holidays, just like a machine in constant operation, and oil is his life.He knows why some streets in Tokyo are dimly lit, but there are many young high school girls standing there. Girls are waiting for buyers. They need to pay their own tuition fees, family expenses and their own expenses.Girls will not admit what they are doing. If someone asks, they will say, "I'm waiting for my classmates."

Japan is not allowed to broadcast the news of China's rise, perhaps unintentionally.Because the Japanese who know the truth can't live happily. In fact, he doesn't feel happy anymore.

In recent months, his Chinese classmates contacted him. Chinese people like to talk about the past. After a long time of no contact, Chinese people's feelings will overflow like wine.He knew something he shouldn't know. He said, "it overturned my imagination."

Before he came to China, he never imagined that food was abundant. In his previous prejudice, he thought that the mainland was an endless poor villa. People living in that land had no money to buy clothes and scientific and technological products. Even roads were rammed with soil. People there were simple and hospitable and content with the status quo.This is far from the case. For food, disgusting Japanese businessmen pursue high profits and do not want mass production of grain. They just want to increase the price of grain by various means and methods. They would rather empty a piece of land for two years and call it restoring the fertility of the soil. Forget it, there is no food. Who cares about the quality?

His first feeling when he got off the airport was that it was not the third world, but the first world, a country comparable to the United States.

Students have no time to pick him up. The other party's work pressure is also very high. Please take a half day off. How much wealth will you lose?In this way, he can go around and learn more about China.He also knows that there is no food in the airport, which is true in airports all over the world. He needs to go to some alleys, some elderly people, who open shops. Their lifelong skills are very magical. The taste is not only to meet the stimulation of taste buds, but also love.He downloaded several apps at the airport. Let alone, it's quite convenient to take a car.

The driver directly sent him to his destination. He didn't need to take out his wallet and pay on his mobile phone.He did enough homework in Japan and knew that China did not use money anymore. He specially handled the relevant payment.He got out of the car and felt that he was wise. Fortunately, he planned all this and was well prepared. Otherwise, how troublesome it would be.

In the alley, he saw rice noodles. The words on the sign said hot and sour noodles. He had heard of this thing.He couldn't wait to walk into the store. It was an old couple from Chongqing. They warmly entertained him. He ate and shouted a stimulus, sweat flowed, and his taste buds burst into nuclear bomb glory.

In the evening, he had enough to eat, drink and play. When he came to the place agreed with his classmates, his classmates drove him home.His classmate's name is Zhou Fei.Zhou Fei said, "I'm glad you came to China. I'm very busy today and didn't pick you up. Please don't take it to heart. I'll have a holiday tomorrow. I'll take you to have a good time."

"It doesn't matter. You're busy first. I can take care of myself."

"You don't mind."

"I won't mind. We are good friends and work is very important. You can't make less money because of me. It's so hard to find a job now."

"I think it's strange to listen to your words. Working in China is everywhere, but it's difficult to find a job you like."

"I've heard you talk about whether there are too few people in China. You know, you've been engaged in family planning because there are fewer people and positions are in short supply?"

"I don't know. I can't tell you from an academic point of view. Subjectively, I think there are many people in our country, but the economy is also developing. Maybe there are reasons you said. Maybe the economy is developing too fast, so more people are needed."

"How are you now?"

"It's average. If I hadn't studied in Japan before, it wouldn't be as good as I thought."

"Why, I don't quite understand. You say China is a good place, but now you seem very upset."

"To be exact, I'm not worried, but I'm worried about my future. In this way, our education is not very excellent. The spoon feeding education leads to our inactivity. I went to Japan to communicate with your active classmates on a large scale. After I returned to China, I was able to get what I wanted in a short time,Of course, there is still a gap from my dream. I am still working hard. I now have a project. I want to take down the project and leave to start a business. I think what I pay is not proportional to what I get. I have a strong ability. Why should I be willing to be shared by others? "

"I understand. Please let me know if you need any help."

"Speaking of help, of course I'd like you to help me. For example, selling Japanese goods to China will make a fortune, but are you willing to do so?"

"I need to understand more thoroughly."

"Haha, haha, so you don't want to do it. Let's see what China is like now. I believe you will have some ideas when you return to your country," Zhou Fei continued. "Did you eat tonight?"

"Oh, I've been eating this afternoon. Now my stomach is full."

"It's nice of you to melt in so soon."

At Zhou Fei's home, Ichiro Takayama asked, "where are we going tomorrow? Have we made a good schedule?"

"It's very simple. What era is it now? It doesn't need to be planned in advance. It's done with a mobile phone. We'll go to the amusement park tomorrow. I'll book tickets on my mobile phone now. We'll go to the botanical garden the day after tomorrow and the zoo in the afternoon."

"Do we have any plans for tomorrow evening?I hear it's a sleepless city. "

"Yes, in the evening, you can see that the clouds in the sky are illuminated by the lights of the city."

"Oh, really?I'm going out to have a look now. "

"Oh, we don't have too many lights here. This is a residential area. We don't like it to be too bright. We have to go to the commercial area. The lights there are colorful and dazzling.Do you want to go to the bar or climb the mountain tomorrow evening? "

"I don't want to go to a place like a bar."

"What do you mean by that place?"

"You know, in a place like Japan, of course it's that kind of place."

"Oh, that's not the case in China."

"I don't want to go either."

"Well, we'll climb the mountain tomorrow night. I'll buy the ticket first," Zhou Fei operated his mobile phone. "You can arrange it yourself from Monday to Friday, so I can't accompany you."

"By the way, what do you need to buy? I don't know if you bring enough materials. After all, you stay for half a month this time."

"Don't worry, I have everything ready."

These days, Ichiro Takayama and Zhou Fei have a lot of fun.After coming out of the zoo, Ichiro Takayama said, "I feel like I have suddenly become a child."

Zhou Fei said, "we are all children. We are happy only when we are children. Why bother so much."

"Maybe this is the charm of China.When I return to Japan, I have to work hard again. I have no rest days, no holidays and work overtime every night. "

"But your salary is high, hundreds of thousands of yen."

"High fart, it's only more than 10000 yuan in RMB."

"That's not high. It's more than 10000 yuan. You can buy clothes every month, eat well outside every meal, play everywhere, travel everywhere, buy a suite, buy a car and have a beautiful wife."

"I don't quite understand. In a place as big as your bedroom, it costs thousands of yuan to rent in Japan, and thousands of yuan to remove the food. In fact, dozens of yuan is enough to eat a bowl of ramen."

"How much do you think we spent on food these days?"

"When I came to China, I went to cheap places. I didn't spend much money, but you and I ate so well that it should cost you one or two thousand yuan. I feel very embarrassed."

"You're wrong. All the expenses of 500 yuan haven't arrived these days."

"Oh, my God, it's incredible."

"If you and I don't eat out, but spend 100 yuan to buy vegetables, it will be enough for us to eat for a week."

"I don't quite understand why things are so cheap."

"I have raised such questions before, but later I understood that it is not important to have more or less money. It is the ability to buy more goods that makes life better. Now it is the industrial age and liberates the labor force. Of course, we can use machines to obtain more goods and make our life better. That's right,Your clothes don't look good at all. "

"These clothes are very expensive."

"Later, I'll go online to help you choose."

"Forget it, I have to pay taxes at the customs, and I won't stay long."

"What's the matter? Just throw it away after wearing it."

When Ichiro Takayama saw Zhou Fei shopping online, he understood what he had said before. The clothes were too cheap, and the clothes were unique and looked very suitable for him.Ichiro Takayama never felt that he had a strong desire for life, but now he has.

"I'm afraid these clothes will take a long time to arrive."

"No, it will arrive tomorrow morning."

The next morning, when Ichiro Takayama opened the package and put on his new clothes, he became very handsome.

"Believe me, your return rate is very high. Countless girls will not refuse you."

In a week, Takayama Ichiro tasted the delicacies of various major cuisines and put on clothes that can only be admired in luxury stores. His handsome foundation was inspired by the goods and became a lovely little handsome man. The girls on the street threw their eyes to eat him. He felt a little shy.One night when Zhou Fei got off duty, he smelled an appetizing aroma at the door. When he opened the door, Ichiro Takayama was playing hot pot.

"Hey, classmate, it's great to live without money."

"Oh, what do you want to express?"

"I mean, I only need a cell phone now. I can do anything."

"That's right. Before I went out, I had to carry a bag with my wallet, mobile phone keys and a lot of things. Now a mobile phone is good."

"I told you I made a thousand dollars today."

"Oh, how did you make it?Have you done a part-time job? "

"No, no, no, no, my Chinese is not very good. The part-time shop certainly won't want me.Today, I made 300 yuan to answer questions for others. Before, I thought knowledge was worthless, because after we went to work, that knowledge didn't work at all, but I didn't think that in China, my knowledge could become money, and what I saw and heard could bring me reward. "

"Yes, if you sign up for an account and write some good articles every week or every day, when you have more fans, how much is your article worth hundreds of thousands?I found an account before and gave him 100000 yuan. He helped me with an advertisement. The effect was very good. "

"Oh, my God, I suddenly feel like I'm at a loss."

"Pull it down. It's good to earn money. How did the remaining 700 yuan come from?"

"Didn't I come to China to take pictures?I brought my camera. I commented under a video. As a result, someone contacted me and asked me to take a group of art photos for their store. "

"Oh, yes, your photography ability is good. Well, you also need to take a picture of my goods for me. You also need to be on the shelf."

"Yes, I went to the vegetable market today. My God, there are fish, meat, vegetables and fruits. It's hard to imagine that this pile adds up to less than 50 yuan."

"You can consider staying in China."

"I hope so, but I'm afraid to stay here."

"What are you afraid of?"

"I think I'm a foreigner. I'm afraid it's difficult to integrate into this society."

"That's also true. Even if you can earn 1000 yuan today, it doesn't mean you can earn it every day. A stable job is better."

"Don't say such despondent words. Look at the hot pot I made today."

"It's strange that you can do this, too."

"I find that I can be a gourmet now because the seasoning bag can let me make any delicious food."

"Don't you also have seasoning bags in Japan?"

"It's not so rich. Now I can do what I want to eat. I think I was a little stupid before. Why should I go out to eat and waste money."

After they had enough to eat and drink, they went out and watched a movie. Ichiro Takayama was keen on movies. He said: "I never thought movies could be so cheap."

"The film itself can be cheap. Why sell it so expensive."

At night, they slept soundly. Ichiro Takayama suddenly heard something in the room. He thought it might be a mouse. The rats in this city are very big.He once saw a mouse as fat as a cat. He couldn't see such a fat mouse in Japan.He didn't care about going to bed. After a while, his voice rang again. This time, he didn't think it was the sound of a mouse, but like the sound of slippers. Maybe his classmates were in a hurry to pee at night?

After a while, he heard the sound of the table moving. He became vigilant. Maybe there was a thief at home, so he quietly got out of bed and thought of a baseball bat in the living room.To be on the safe side, he quietly picked up the plastic bucket and walked slowly to the living room. He quietly came to the side of the baseball bat and picked up the stick.Takayama yelled. He hoped the sound would wake up his roommate.

The man stood still and Ichiro Takayama threw the stool over.

The shadow was startled and shouted, "who are you?"

The voice was very familiar. Ichiro Takayama recognized Zhou Fei's voice. He asked, "what are you doing if you don't sleep in the middle of the night?"

"I... I don't know. I'm not in bed. How did I get to the living room?"

"Are you under too much pressure recently? Are you sleepwalking?"

"Maybe, maybe I've been under too much pressure recently."

"I'll pour you a glass of juice."Takayama Ichiro turned on the light, but saw a scene he would never forget.He saw Zhou Fei's left hand had disappeared, as if it had been cut off with a watermelon knife. It was strange that there was no drop of blood, but his right hand reached into the wall.Ichiro Takayama held the baseball bat tightly. He said, "what's the matter with you?Your hand? "

"My hand?Ah, my hand, ah, what's the matter?What's the matter?Help -- help me. "

"Devil, you are the devil."Takayama Ichiro opened the door in a panic and rushed out.

When he came to the door of the community, he was sweating with fright. Was he thinking that I was dreaming?After calming down, he regretted that he left Zhou Fei alone in the hall.He's scared.He wanted to call the police, but realized that the mobile phone was still in the bedroom and he only wore a pair of trousers. He couldn't give up Zhou Fei, so he went back again.

After returning, he didn't see Zhou Fei's shadow. Zhou Fei seemed to disappear out of thin air. His father-in-law and monk couldn't figure it out. There was only one entrance and exit to the house. He didn't see anyone go out.

He didn't have time to think about it. He immediately put on his clothes and took away some necessities such as his mobile phone.When he was ready to go out, he saw a pile of dust where Zhou Fei stood. He couldn't explain.He wondered if Zhou Fei had become a pile of inanimate things. Only the devil would turn into earth because he saw the light.

He didn't dare to stay here. He thought he should return to Japan. He didn't want to force himself into a desperate situation because of this. He didn't want to spend his life in prison. Even if he truthfully told the police all this, who would believe it.

After returning to Japan, Ichiro Takayama was arrested by the police.He knew that no one would believe his words. His best way was to shut up. No matter how the police interrogated him, he avoided talking. No matter what pressure he was given, he didn't open his mouth.Two weeks later, a woman in uniform saw him, put a group of photos in front of him and said, "I believe you didn't kill. We did encounter some phenomena that can't be explained scientifically. You're not the only witness, but you're the first witness. I need to know what you saw?"

Ichiro Takayama will not believe what these people say. The world is evil. There are no good people in the world. He will not hurt himself because of other people's deception.He still doesn't speak.The woman had no way and said, "I hope you will think about it."So he left.A few days later, the prison floor shook. He thought it was an earthquake again, but he seemed to hear the sound of breathing. He was alone in the room. He held his breath. He believed it was his own breathing, but he still held his breath. The sound of breathing grew louder and louder. Takayama Ichiro's eyes widened. He leaned tightly against the wall,He didn't know what happened to the floor. He could think of all kinds of strange legends of his own country and nation. Those demons and ghosts sprang up in his mind.

Takayama Ichiro gradually saw a face emerging from the floor. It was goofy's face. His hands waved to catch any object that could be touched. Takayama Ichiro said in a panic: "goofy, goofy, I didn't kill you. It's none of my business. We are classmates. Please don't do this to me."

Goofy seems to hear Ichiro Takayama's voice. He turns his head and sees Ichiro in bed, and then slowly climbs over.

On the land of Japan, countless hands stretch out from the ground.From the earth, from the rocks, from the walls, from the floor, their hands rose like bamboo. They waved to catch anything they could.

 2017Completed on August 2

[restorerjourney]

Week 5: The Father’s Heart

Aloha!

Here are some fun facts about my experience so far, YWAM, and Kona that I would like to share before diving into what week 5 has been like.

-The sunsets are FIRE, like the sky literally looks like it’s on fire

-I am used to seeing chameleons and cockroaches... they don’t phase me but HUGE centipedes I can’t....they are the size of a man’s hand....bleh WHY

-My skin has been GLOWING! I have zero breakouts...I wonder why. My diet has been worse here if anything...maybe it’s the water? lack of stress? who knows but I love it. I stopped taking my all medications and so far so good!

-The mosquitoes here are RELENTLESS. They will suck your blood through your clothes! (sad face). I’ve never been bitten so much in my life and I normally don’t get bit

- I love the prayer room. There is this sense of peace when you enter in whether if you are doing your bible reading, journaling, or talking to the Lord.

- None of the kids here really look at their phone..it’s amazing. 

- Water here does not taste good..it has a weird aftertaste but I HAVE FOUND AN AMAZING SOLUTION. Keeping the water cold and picking free lime from our abundant lime trees solved the aftertaste! Thank you Jesus

- I wake up at 6am without an alarm clock 

- Hawaii has every biome except Tundra and because of that, it can also experience every weather disaster except avalanche. 

- It’s “Carmageddon” here because there is a shortage of cars and the car rental prices have tripled here. Thankfully we were able to rent a car for a decent price compared to the market by a kind old ywamer. 

Ok to summarize week 5... The lecture was given by Pastor Jimmy who overseas all the Restorer DTS. Pastor Jimmy is a 1.5 generation Korean American who grew up in Brooklyn, NY and had a very tough life. Others including himself testified that he was the blackest sheep who was the last person you would have imagine become a christian due to his past. He was known to be a thug on the streets and everyone feared him. Although his lecture style was not structured, his story-telling style really stuck with me because it was so raw, personal, and intentional. His testimony revealed that no matter how colorful your life was, God can save and that everyone, even the least expected are truly in need of a savior. He shared especially about how he was so rebellious against his own father and the struggle of their relationship. He also shared the perspective of being a father with 3 kids and despite loving his children so much, he confessed that he struggles showing love the way the children want to receive because of his own upbringing. This really made me think of my own relationship with my father and helped me understand where he is coming from. I know my dad loves me so much. Yet sometimes he doesn’t show the love the way that I crave. He wants to say how much he loves me and cares for me, but sometimes he ends up saying something else that can hurt me. If Pastor Jimmy, who is this amazing christian on fire for God and someone who loves his precious daughter, is struggling with this, I’m sure my own father may also experience the same. I just knew in my heart that God wanted me to hear this to experience freedom, peace, and healing. 

Once a week we have a time called “Restore, Renew, Rebuild” where we worship, pray, and receive intercessory prayer. It’s emotionally exhausting but an amazing experience where we see break through in ourselves and in our team. Before coming to this session, I prayed to really experience the physical manifestation of the Holy Spirit. God surely delivered. As I was standing and worshipping, I felt the Holy Spirit move and my legs and limbs started twitching. I thought “God really...out of all other manifestation, a twitching one?”, but then I was like “alright God let’s do it, bring it on”. I just felt so much peace and warmth being in His presence. Pastor Jimmy prayed for each one of us and it brought so much life to me. He prayed that God knew how much I sacrificed to be here..that Jesus was piggybacking me...that I have a gift of empathy but my heart has become hardened by this world but He has plans to restore it...that He sees my clothes being changed ( the way I interpreted it when I heard it was a promise of marriage and new season from the desert that I’ve been)...and that He has a special mission for me to do and He was going to guide me towards it. This may sound rubbish or random but for me it hit so many prayer requests that I’ve had for so long. When I heard from others what Pastor Jimmy prayed, it was so specific and spot on. Experiencing and witnessing the gift of intercessory prayer was amazing. And also the right kind. Not the condemning one that I’ve experienced in the past during college but the right one that encourages and builds up.

During the weekend, we went for a short hike on Makahi Trail. Literally when we were driving up, our ear starts popped multiple times and the temperature dropped 20 degrees F. It was refreshing to see a different scenery and to see so much life thriving on this island. The rest of the time, I mostly caught up with friends back at home, catching up with them, sharing what I’ve learned especially Immanuel journaling, and even reconciling. Immanuel journaling is a practice that I’ve learned from a sister in Christ who is studying biblical counseling here in YWAM and it a great way to hear God through writing. If any of you guys are interested please let me know and I would love to share this with you. It’s been so life-giving to my friends back at home when we did it together via facetime. 

Prayer Request:

1) Endurance and strength: I can’t believe there is 6 more weeks before we go to our outreach. It’s a privilege being fed so much love and guidance and experiencing such Christ-like community. It is exhausting though because our schedule is PACKED. Especially if it’s ministry time where we have to face our demons and allow the Holy Spirit do spiritual surgery on us. Please pray for God’s grace to give us endurance and strength so that this new wine will not pour out and that our hearts will become new wineskin.

2) Physical healing and restoration: Please pray for my arthritic neck and shoulders. I still struggle with aches and pain especially in the morning and sometimes would get a neck cramp that will wake me up in the middle of the night. Also I have discontinued all my medications after much prayer and peace about it. Please pray for full restoration and healing from my polycystic ovarian syndrome and hormonal imbalance. I am not able to have a regular cycle and I’ve always worried about my future possibility of having children...looking back I said I wasn’t worried but I actually had zero expectation in order to protect myself. I believe God didn’t want me to kill that hope but He wanted me to still ask in faith and surrender trusting the Father’s heart whatever the result. Please pray that I would learn from Him how to do this.

3) Outreach preparation. We are finalizing our trip to Mazatlan, Mexico. Please pray for wisdom and peace for the leaders Jason, Grace, and Esther. Please pray for unity for our team as we get to know each other and for us to understand the Father’s heart for His people in Mazatlan, Mexico. 

Mahalo,

Alicia 

[dailyaudiobible]

06/08/2018 DAB Transcript

1 Kings 3:3-4:34, Acts 6:1-15, Psalms 126:1-6, Proverbs 16:26-27

Today is the 8th day of June. Welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I am Brian and it is a pleasure and it is an honor to be here with you today, taking the next step forward. Today would've been my mom's 76th birthday. Of course, it's been about a year and half now since her passing in January of 2017 but for years and years she was with us as a listener every day and I would tell her, happy birthday. So, hard to break with that tradition. Happy birthday mom. So, we’re reading from the Amplified Bible this week and we’re just getting going into Solomon's life. He has stepped into the role of his father. He is the king of Israel and he's got a lot more on his plate then he was maybe prepared for. First Kings chapter 3 verse 3 through 4 verse 34 today.

Commentary:

Okay. So, in first Kings, just to catch us up, Solomon is firmly on the throne now, firmly on the throne. And we watched how that all happened. And it was not the prettiest transition. And we can see Solomon trying to settle into the authority of the king and realizing, man, this is not…there’s just a lot. And he went to God. He went to God and asked for wisdom. And in response, he got what he wanted and everything he could've needed and became known as the wisest man in the world. And we’ll watch that unfold. We were told that he had piece on every side and that he was respected but we’ll see the people journey to Solomon to hear his wisdom. And, actually, this is one of the most glorious times in the Bible. Like, we are at this point in the Old Testament where we have been following a story since Genesis, back in January when we met Abraham, we’ve been following this story all along. And Solomon, his reign is kind of the mountaintop, the apex of it all. So, we’re in a really good time where everything is moving in the right direction at least for a season. And, so, let's enjoy that.

In the book of Acts, things are moving forward as well. The Holy Spirit is drawing people and people are flocking to this teaching around Jesus. But it's also making those who were in power or had great influence jealous trying to figure out what to do about this. And today we saw the formation of what is now known as the diaconate, right? Deacons. And we’ll learn more about that as we move further into the New Testament, that these people who were appointed to make sure that the Windows are taking care of, people were looked after. So, for the first time we meet this man. His name is Stephen. And we’re going to follow his story for a little bit. But through Stephen's story we’re going to be able to revisit all of the story that we've traveled with since January. And we’re just talking about how the story began with Abraham and moved its way forward all the way to Solomon. We get a review of that through Stephen in the coming days.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. We thank You for Your immense kindness and patience with us. We thank You that Your love never fails even when we do. When ours does, we ask Your forgiveness for the ways in which we have stepped away from You or betrayed You. We are sorry. Your spirit is what gives us life. To, in any way, walk away from that is to walk away from life. Come, Holy Spirit, indwell us, fill us, guide us, and lead us forward deeper into Jesus we pray. In Jesus’ name we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

dailyaudiobible.com is the website, it's home base, it’s where you find out what’s going on around here.

And we've been talking about the Daily Audio Bible family reunion that's coming up here in the rolling hills of Tennessee September 1st and 2nd, which is Labor Day weekend for those of us in the United States. And it seems like you're excited about it is much as we are. So, we’re gonna have a blast. It’s gonna be a great time indeed. These kinds of things, they come up. They’re a little bit bittersweet for me. It’s like… my mom…my mom…she was in very, very, very poor health but I'm pretty sure she'd of wanted to be at this. And I'm sure we would've brought her to this, oxygen tank and wheelchair and all. Yeah, she would’ve wanted to be there for dinner. She, yeah, yeah. So, it’s like a little bit of a bittersweet thing but I am very much looking forward to the family coming together, you know, kind of stepping out of the Internet and into life because it's important to know that we’re not alone. So, this is gonna be great. And you’re gonna get to explore…to explore the rolling hills of Tennessee. There's quite a bit to do in the Nashville area. It’s a thriving, booming area and we have prepared some adventures for you to consider, some things that you might want to see when you're in the area as you explore. Maybe you’ll explore together with some new friends, or maybe you're coming here and I you already have some friends, but there from somewhere else and you’re gonna meet up here. All that's happening and it's gonna be great. So, we’re looking for that. It’s September 1st and 2nd and you can register now. Registration is, it's looking like it's going to fill up. So, we’ll keep you posted. But there's still room, there's still time. So, plan to come in September to the Daily Audio Bible family reunion, the first of its kind ever. You can get all the details at dailyaudibible.com in the Initiatives section, which just means scroll down…scroll down on the homepage and you'll find it or you can follow the navigation at the top. Click initiatives and you'll find it there. Registration is $50 per person and that includes access to the grounds at Deer Run, where we’ll be holding the event. They have all kinds of stuff to do. It’s a huge place that’s just centered in the hills. And it's like a look at the rolling hills up close. So, we’ll have two country dinners together as a community. We’ll have our evenings together where we’ll spend time talking, singing, playing, enjoying fellowship with one another for a couple of evenings. So we’re very, very much looking forward to that. Everything that's on the Deer Run grounds, I mean access to the Deer Run grounds and all kinds of stuff to do is a part of that. So, you can just kind of camp out there if you want. There are still a few…all the cabins are sold out but there are some tent spaces left. There are the men and women's bunkhouses, kind of dorms. There’s still some bunks left. Or you can find your own accommodations. We have put the closest ones, closest hotels. We’ve kind of gotten with them and gotten all situated there. So, those are all at the website. So, you can kind of see all that. If  you're an RV’r, we’re showing you as well where you can go for full hookups. It's a little bit of a hike, about 40 minutes to get the full hookups. But not that big of a deal. And right through the rolling hills of Tennessee. So, it's…you can do…you can come however you want to come and we’ll have a good time together. So, check it all out at dailyaudiobible.com in the Initiatives section - Daily Audio Bible Family Reunion. We’ll see you there.

If you want to partner with the Daily Audio Bible, you can do that dailyaudiobible.com. There is a link on the homepage. Thank you for your partnership. The global campfire exists at all because we do this together every day. So, thank you for your partnership. So, there’s a link on the homepage. If you're using the Daily Audio Bible, you can press the Give button in the upper right-hand corner or, if you prefer, the mailing address is PO Box 1996 Spring Hill Tennessee 37174.

And, as always if you have a prayer request or comment, 877-942-4253 is the number to dial.

And that's it for today. I'm Brian I love you and I'll be waiting for next month, which is tomorrow.

Community Prayer and Praise:

Good morning Daily Audio Bible friends and community. This is Diane O. B. from Newburgh Indiana. Shalom, shalom. Nothing is missing and nothing is broken. It is 12:43 AM on Tuesday, June the 5th and I have a praise report and a prayer request. My praise report is that I did a sleep study and it turned out…I thought it turned out really well and then I heard...the lady called me and said it was about the same as the last one. But I had a real good time in the Lord and that made me very happy. My prayer request is, I haven’t been able to do so well in the last week with my exercise and diet for diabetes. And there’s something that Brian said, that comparing myself and always feeling like I failed. And Jesus said, what is that to you? Come and follow me. And I guess I have something where I have from my upbringing, if I’m not doing well, Jesus is not pleased with me. And I think that’s wrong thinking. But Jesus loves me and tells me to follow Him and I can just repent and get back, starting back, and pick myself up. If a righteous man falls…

Hello. This is my first time calling. And my name, when translated, is My God has Answered. And I am calling because I do need prayer. My children and I had been a military family for 10 years and our soldier went on three tours of duty and came back a completely different man. And the short story is that we have had to change identities after we were notified by state authorities that our lives were in danger. And it has been a very difficult 4 ½ years. We have gone through bouts of homelessness and not enough income and I’m just asking that…that anyone who has a heart to remember us in prayer, that God would restore us and that we could get in incredible testimony to his love and his power through Jesus Christ. And I just want to encourage Stephanie, who I just heard on the call, that God does not forget his children. He knows what you need.

Good morning family. This is Rachel in Houston and I know I haven’t called in a long time but the Holy Spirit just sort of slapped me in the back of the head. I’m a few days behind. And, Jamie, I just heard your message at the end of the May 30th podcast. And I really just want to share with you, just to seek God. And He says, seek ye first the kingdom of God and all things will be gathered unto you. And I pray…I’m praying for your heart. I pray that He will give you…He will give you that desire for Him because once you…once you experience that desire you will never ever, ever want to give it up. And I pray for your marriage. It’s a hard thing to have someone love you and not know how to…how to love them the way that they need to be loved. And I am praying that God will give you that peace to know sometimes we can’t love people the way that they need to be loved and they need something that we can provide them, that only God can provide to them. And so, don’t burn yourself for that. Just seek God in all things. And I love you girl and I am praying for you and I just want you to know that I will be…I will be seeking any wisdom that God will give me for you and I’ll be sharing that. I love you family and shout out to the women at the More Gathering. What an amazing event. Viv from Canada, I love you sister and I will talk to you all soon. Love you.

Good afternoon DAB family. I am calling about two prayer requests that I heard for June 4th. Today is June 5th. There were two gentlemen. One sounded so much, not his voice, but his petition, sounded so much like my brother who is struggling in his marriage the way his wife speaks to him, his reaction. He is needing a job. He’s been out of a job for six months. I have been praying and interceding. I’ve called before for him. And that call just got to me, that petition, because it just reminded me so much of my brother. And I just wanted to let you know brother, you didn’t give your name but God knows who you are and I am so, so standing in the gap for your marriage, for you asking for the Lord and for us to help you know how to answer your wife and not in anger, not to fight back as we humanly do. We get defensive and so we respond in the wrong way, but that you would be filled with wisdom and discernment and with love overall. And that God would just fill you with whatever you need. I know you don’t want to marriage to break apart. So, I will be praying for you wherever you are. For your wife to. We have to pray for her. And I know that you guys are praying for my brother, for his needs, for his marriage, and his situation with work. I mean for the other brother who was asking for prayer for his son who is making a very important decision that…

[affikki1028]

The Advantages and Disadvantages of Dry Camping

New Post has been published on http://www.webshophost.xyz/the-advantages-and-disadvantages-of-dry-camping/

The Advantages and Disadvantages of Dry Camping

One of the key advantages of RV travel is that all it takes to technically start camping is to throw the motorhome or tow vehicle into “Park.” With most vehicles being highly self-sufficient – even away from the power grid and water hookups of your average campground – any stretch of land can become an impromptu campsite for the night. A secluded spot next to a stream. An empty field or a deserted parking lot. Yes, even Aunt Edna’s driveway, if you’re so inclined.

Such features as an onboard generator and/or inverter, LP tank(s), fresh water supply, and holding tanks make such a reality possible. That is, assuming you know what you’re doing. Surely, the temptation to dry camp or boondock, where travelers camp in one way or another away from standard campsites and hookups, appeals to the gypsy spirit in many of us at some point and time. And there are other reasons, too.

Me, Myself, and I A sense of community is always nice, but sometimes being thrown into the mix at the local campground isn’t exactly what you’re looking for. Larger campgrounds may swell to thousands of campers on a busy weekend; poorly laid out parks stack RVs one right on top of each other. Where did all these people come from? While no one can deny the benefits of full hookups, hot showers, game room, and mini-mart, frankly, established campgrounds are not for everybody. Even the five-star RV resorts that do everything from back in your RV to massage your feet might sometimes miss the point. You want to get away from it all, and that means blazing your own trail. Setting up the travel trailer at the secluded fishing hole. Maneuvering the motorhome through the deepest reaches of the dense forest until you find the perfect spot. Ah, now that’s more like it. No sounds of idling diesels next-door, no kids playing Frisbee through your campsite. Just you, your crew, and nature. Isn’t this the way it was supposed to be?

Location, Location, Location An RV trip isn’t always to popular destinations, where campsites are plentiful. Some folks, who take the second-home concept seriously, choose to set up their rig for an extended stay in a place where an established campground might not be found. For example, that fold-down camper of yours might work admirably in grandma’s backyard during your lengthy visit. Best of all, the grandkids are nice and close. Or perhaps it’s the part-time job that’s got you working at the Christmas tree lot, volunteering at that State Park, or selling your wares at a regional art show that requires on-site living sans hookups? Patient’s families have been known to “camp out” at the hospital, in order to be close to a loved one during a time of crisis. Furthermore, those whose hobbies take them far off the highways – such as motor sports enthusiasts, rock climbers, or boaters – often won’t find better nightly accommodations than their RVs. Different situations call for different accommodations, and your RV is ready for any of it.

Drastic Times Call for… The couple was absolutely dumbfounded by the no vacancy signs up and down Pennsylvania’s Interstate-80. They looked everywhere, by the end of the night just hoping for any campsite, anywhere. Unfortunately, it was fall foliage season and every single place was booked. Sound familiar? It’s getting late and everyone’s exhausted? Somebody forgot to make the reservations and things are looking a little grim. Any RV maverick who heads for a prime tourist spot in-season knows full well how quickly campgrounds can fill up, often forcing a decision of where to beach the rig for the night. Truth is, sometimes boondocking is a necessity – even if you don’t particularly like the idea of bunking down in a Wal-Mart parking lot or deserted field. If you’re not going to be a stickler about making reservations, it’s best to work out dry camping skills in advance – before you have to use them.

Money Woes Compared to even a moderately priced motel, most RV parks, campgrounds – even plush RV resorts – are terrific deals. A night spent at a state or national park is cheaper still, bolstered by the kinds of bedazzling views one won’t find just any old place. However, there are those of the RVing sect who say hooey to the whole notion of paying to camp. After all, they already ponied up $100,000 for the motorhome, which is the premier full-time camping machine. By their thinking, every night spent parked in the woods or at a friend’s house or catching zzz’s at the truck stop is money in the bank. Of course, campground owners don’t much like this free-wheelin’ philosophy, but you can’t beat the price of a night of dry camping.

The Can-Do Spirit Many RVers started as tent campers, so we’re used to the idea of roughin’ it. And just because we made the transformation from soggy sleeping bag to comfy digs doesn’t mean we no longer embrace – or at least pine for – the pioneering spirit. Many of us still cuddle our inner explorer and we get a thunderous sense of pride from camping out where few motorhome tires have tread before. We’re talking about a spot so rustic that not even the pricey satellite dish works. Generating your own power, carrying your own water, feasting on fresh trout or a pantry full of canned goods is a sure-fire way to restore one’s swagger – regardless if it’s in a $5,000 truck camper or $500,000 diesel-pusher. Free camping can be found throughout many of the million acres governed of the Bureau of Land Management and National Wildlife Refugees.

Before You Go… However, contrary to popular belief, the world is not your oyster. One cannot simply park their vehicle anywhere they please and throw out the welcome mat. There are laws to consider, etiquette to follow, and safety concerns to factor. Furthermore, different RVs offer different capabilities as far as boondocking is concerned. Many smaller towables lack the ability to generate their own power, lacking an onboard generator, inverter, or even solar power applications. Smaller fresh water tanks will limit the duration of the trip – and length of shower, for that matter – of any off-roading adventure. Is your RV up to the challenge? Are you? Here’s a few things to consider before camping without a net.

Safety First The problem with camping in Parts Unknown is just that – you just don’t know. Is it safe or not? While every campground isn’t necessarily Fort Knox, the reputable ones are well-lit, fenced-in, and offer the safety-in-numbers reassurance you won’t get bunking at the truck stop or deepest, darkest woods. For me, every snap of a tree branch sends me into a deep, paranoid panic when parked in isolation. For others, it’s all part of the natural experience. Still, one must never compromise the safety factor. If it’s just a matter of spending the night before moving on in the morning, gravitate towards spots that are well-lit, fairly busy, and ideally located near the communal bond of another RV or two. Parked under a streetlight might not make for the best night’s sleep you’ve ever had, but it does provide some assurances of safety. Moreover, make sure doors and windows are locked, possession brought inside for the night, and you know where the keys are in the case of a much-needed quick getaway. That, and a Louisville Slugger in case things ever get, ahem, interesting.

Legal Matters While Wal-Mart has made it well-known how much they just love harboring RVers for the night, many potential landlords aren’t so giving. Nor are some towns, which feel squatters may not be the best thing for the community – or the local businesses that profit from overnight guests. The fact is the land you’re looking to camp on – be it in the back of a mall lot or next to a woodland stream – belongs to somebody. And that somebody probably isn’t you. At the very least, one should always try to get the owner’s okay before activating the slide-out and sending up the TV antennae for the big game. Otherwise, that tapping you hear on the side of the window at 4 a.m. might just be Officer Friendly looking to point you back on the highway. As a rule of etiquette, it’s always nice to support a business that has allowed you to camp over for the night.

Is Your Rig Worthy? The axiom is painful yet true: The smaller the RV, the less stuff it’s got. Smaller fresh water tanks mean less aqua for drinking and washing, while minuscule holding tanks dictate fewer days spent in the wild before needing to purge. Keep this in mind before scheduling a two-week odyssey far away from civilization. As we mentioned, your vehicle may or may not have means to create electricity onboard, forcing owners to invest in a portable generator or inverter to do the work. On the flip side, a smaller unit is better when it comes to maneuvering you and your crew to more reclusive places. A camper van or truck camper is a superior off-road machine, capable of squeezing through the tight passages that a 40′ motorhome or 60′ worth of trailer and tow vehicle can only dream about. In short, don’t write checks your RV can’t cash. Know and respect your RV’s limits, and plan accordingly. Moreover, what is the condition of the RV? Is everything working okay? Better be sure before you find yourself 20 miles away from a paved road with a flat tire or a dead battery. As you would before any trip, fully inspect the unit and stay on top of any preventative maintenance and routine service.

Ready, Set, Camp Even if you never intend to spend one single, solitary moment camping away from full hookups and the predictable fun of a campground, it’s still a good idea to at least know how what your RV is capable of – just in case. The best advice is to test your dry-camping skills in a safe environment. The smartest way is to get a no-hookup campsite (or get full hookups and don’t use them the first night or two) to see how you do. Or just try things out in the driveway. You’ll learn all-too-quickly you and your RV’s learning curve. How fast does your family go through water? How much LP do you need for a weekend or more? How adept are you at cooking over a campfire if the LP gas runs out? How much can your generator handle at one time – or how good are you at conserving electricity? Ah, yes, conservation, the backbone of the dry camping experience. Here’s some ways to get the most out of less.

Restore Power If you run out of electricity, you run out of a lot. Fortunately, there are ways to keep that from happening, namely through the use of a generator or inverter to keep the batteries surging. Portable models aren’t cheap, but are available to prolong your stays in the great outdoors. Otherwise, you’ll need to adopt a highly disciplined approach to squeeze every bit of juice out of your batteries. Turn off all unnecessary lights and appliances when not in use. A few guilty parities are the water pump, electric step, or exterior lights, which all subtly eat up the amps. Forgo the blow dryer and air conditioner, which are big electricity-users. Park in the shade, on hot days, to keep the refrigerator from overworking, but still keeping things cool onboard. Don’t keep playing with the slide-outs or spend the whole afternoon watching TV. Keep an eye on that monitor panel. You don’t want the batteries to drain to zero. Remember: In a pinch, a decent-length drive can partially recharge your coach battery when readings begin to wane.

Water World Not everyone has a 100-gallon water tank. For everyone who doesn’t, it’s time to conserve, considering that water is critical for cooking, cleaning, and hydrating the crew. How else are you going to make Kool-Aid? Thankfully, fresh water is pretty easy to maintain and re-supply if you should run out (Quick Mart, anyone?) Still, shorter showers (remember the in-and-out style of the “Navy” shower) and minimizing hand washing (use hand sanitizers when possible) should maintain water levels. Don’t leave the water on when brushing teeth or washing dishes, either. If there are facilities nearby for showering and such, use them. And just think – the less water you use, the less goes into the holding tanks. It’s a win-win. A final thought: Just because no one may be able to see you doesn’t give you the right to dump the tanks during your boondocking adventures. We’re on our best behavior, right? Fifty gallons worth of spewing gray and black water is no way to repay someone for using his or her property.

Pro-Propane LP gas is a pretty hardy resource, meaning it’s tough to run out if you have any decent-size tanks. However, our conservative approach should still be employed here as well. The best way to stretch the propane supply is to cook outdoors. A campfire is still the most fun and flavorful way to prepare a meal, a method that simply can’t be replicated in the RV’s oven no matter how you try. Snuffing out pilot light’s when not in use will stretch your supply even further. Otherwise, go easy on the furnace and water heater.

Provisions Overloading the RV is a bad thing. Running out of Mac N’ Cheese 30 miles from the nearest town isn’t too good, either. Dry-campers must walk the line between loading up and overloading, which is hopefully something that comes with experience. Spare canned goods, firewood, and portable cooking devices can go a long way when roughin’ it – provided they don’t tilt your vehicle into the overweight condition. If boondocking plans simply call for a night here and a night there, you probably won’t run out of food or supplies. However, if the campout is of the epic variety, be realistic about how much of everything you might need and how easy it will be to get more. Bring extra food and water, if need be, since a hungry group quickly falls into mutiny mode. A few other possible items to include: portable grill/cooking grate, charcoal, fishing poles and tackle box, extra blankets, alkaline batteries, cell phone, first aid kit, tool kits, hatchet/saw, manual can opener, cooking tools, and bug spray. And don’t head into the woods with the fuel tank on “E.” Chances are your generator will munch on some of the fuel and dry camping is no time to run out of gas.

portable inverter generator #Advantages #Disadvantages #Dry #Camping

[hegemoneapple]

Basilisk Eyes: Chapter 30: Train to Waterloo

Crossposted: Basilisk Eyes by Hegemone | Completed: Chapter 30 out of 157 | T | AO3 | FFN | WATT | HPFF

Harry and Hermione stood on the platform waiting for the train to London with Dr. Granger. Harry had shaken out his staff to restore it to its normal size so he could show Hermione how he used it to get around.

“That’s really impressive, Harry,” Hermione commented when he walked around a rubbish bin to demonstrate how useful it was.

“Here, you want to try?” he held it out to her.

“Oh, I don’t know, Harry,” she said hesitantly, but she took it from his hand and held still while he tried to put the aftí on her ear. After a bit of awkward fumbling that involved getting his hands tangled in her hair, she smoothed it back and guided his hand to her ear so that he could put it on. He heard her walking around, tapping the ground. “It’s not saying anything, Harry,” she said.

“You’ve extended your index finger down the length, right? Are you swinging it from left to right in an arc in front of your body as I showed you?” he asked, “and stepping with your opposite foot?”

“Oh, okay, now it’s doing it. That’s cool!”

She walked around with it a bit more. Hermione came up next to Harry and handed it back to him. She touched the back of his hand with it and then grasped his other hand and turned it palm up to place the aftí in it. 

“You really can’t see the aftí once it is in place, Harry,” Hermione remarked.

“Harry, I’ve been thinking,” said Dr. Granger. “Maybe before we catch the train, we should go talk to your Aunt and Uncle.”

“Oh, I don’t think that would be a good idea, Dr. Granger.”

“Why not?” 

“Well, they are really busy right now. That’s why they couldn’t take me.” Harry lied again. He’d had parents of friends from primary who’d done similar things… and it had not gone well for Harry. Never had it improved his lot… it had only made things worse.

The train came into the station and Harry could tell that Dr. Granger was torn.

“Really, it’s okay. They want me to be independent,” said Harry.

“I think this is a bit much, sending a newly blinded child on the train to London to find his adaptation training on his own!” 

“Well, they know I have this staff.” He held up his staff. “It makes it easier for me, right?” 

“Well, okay, but I’m going to give them a call when I get home,” Dr. Granger conceded as they boarded the train. Harry held onto Hermione’s shoulder and held his staff in his left hand, parallel to his body as they went up the stairs into the car.  

Harry was tempted to tell him not to, but decided to let it go. 

Maybe he’ll forget.

“Harry, don’t you have more luggage?” Dr. Granger inquired when the got on and found their seats. “I understand that this course you’re taking will last a month.”

“I’ve got it all with me, Dr. Granger. My staff holds a lot,” he said leaning in close so that he didn’t have to say it too loudly. He collapsed it and put it in his pocket.

“That is truly amazing.” 

The train started to pull out of the station and Harry sat back in his seat feeling a bit tired and a little content. It felt really good to be sitting next to Hermione and her dad, though, he had a niggling worry for Hedwig. 

I hope she’s okay!

“Harry, how’d you crack your glasses?” Hermione asked.

“I ran into a door.” 

“Oh, ow! Maybe when we’re at the training center, I can fix them for you.”

“That’d be nice. I tried to repair a napkin of my Aunt’s that I burned—I guess it was my great-grandmother’s—when I was ironing, but she said that it turned all sorts of different colors. It fixed the holes and it felt whole to me. I used the Reparo charm with my staff. So I’ve been nervous about trying the charm with other things, like my glasses.” 

“That’s weird that it turned it different colors. Why do you think it did that?” Hermione asked.

“Well, I didn’t know the word for napkin, so I just said ‘Reparo napkin,’ I think that’s why it happened. When you fixed my glasses, you said, ‘Occulus reparo,’ remember?”

“I guess that could be it.” agreed Hermione.

“Harry, Hermione, I’m going to use the facilities, I’ll be back in a little bit,” Dr. Granger said as he got up.

“Harry—you can’t tell my dad about the Basilisk, okay? I didn’t tell him about any of that stuff or even that I was petrified!” 

“Oh, okay. What did you tell him happened to me, then?” Harry asked.

“Well, I told my parents that you were injured by an exploding cauldron when you were trying to protect Ginny from a bully. I wrote about this in my letter, but I guess you didn’t get it.” 

“Bully is a bit of an understatement.” 

“They’ll never let me return to Hogwarts if they knew anything about some monster lurking in the castle or if they knew how close I got to being killed by it.” 

Harry let out a sigh. With everything that had happened since he had forgotten about that. Hermione was almost killed by the Basilisk, too. He felt a little twinge of guilt for befriending Nio, and then he mentally kicked himself. 

Nio is nothing like the Basilisk. And maybe the Basilisk wouldn’t have been so bad if it hadn’t been controlled by Tom Riddle.

Harry was feeling like he was being lulled to sleep by the motion of the train. It was weird to travel on a train and not see the landscape rushing by.

Dr. Granger returned and it sounded like he’d brought a newspaper with him.

Harry asked Hermione about the last month of school that he missed and she started recounting all the lessons that he missed and pretty soon he was having a harder and harder time paying attention. He felt like he was weaving in and out of consciousness until he gave in completely and laid his head on her shoulder.

oO0OooO0OooO0OooO0Oo

“Harry, Harry,” Hermione said as she shook his shoulder.

Harry sat up and wiped a string of drool suspended from his lip with the back of his hand.

“Oh, sorry, Hermione. I guess I fell asleep.” 

“It’s okay, Harry. You looked tired. I bet you needed to sleep.” He touched her shoulder where his head had been resting and found a corresponding spot of wetness.

“Oh, sorry. I drooled on you.” He was embarrassed.

“Harry, it’s okay,” Hermione insisted, though he imagined that she was a bit grossed out by it. He could only go by her voice.

“We’re getting close to the Waterloo station. I think we get off there and then walk to the Waterloo East station to catch the underground to Charing Cross Road.” 

Harry held onto his staff and whispered, “Tempus,” to find out the time. The lyrical voice of the staff said, “8:13 am.”

“What time is it?” Hermione asked. Harry told her. 

“That’s really handy—your aftí means you can use magic while you’re around muggles.” 

“Yeah, it’s nice. What are you going to do after you drop me off at the Adaptation training.” 

“Dad said he’d take me to the British Museum afterward.” 

“Oh, I bet you’ll love that.” Harry was glad that he didn’t have to go to some boring museum.

“Harry, before I forget, I want to give you my phone number. Is there something I can write it on for you, that you could read it with your anagnóstis?” 

“Oh, I have the note from the doctor you could write it on there,” Harry said, pulling it out of his bookbag. “Do you have a pencil or pen?” 

She did and he listened to the pencil scratching on the parchment.

“I wrote my number on the back and also Ron’s number.” 

“Thanks. That’s great.” 

Harry felt better knowing that he could call his friends, given access to a muggle phone. 

“I don’t know if they will have muggle phones at the training,” admitted Harry. “But I should be able to send letters with Hedwig, once she comes back.” 

He couldn’t hide the worry in his voice.

“She’ll find you, Harry.” 

“I hope so. I don’t know what this training will be like, but maybe I can come visit you on the weekend or something.” 

“Oh, that would be great, Harry!” 

“Yes, Harry, you’d be welcome any time,” Dr. Granger agreed. “We are going to France for holiday mid-July and into August, though.”

“Oh, wow. What part of France?” Harry asked.

“Paris. Emma (Hermione’s mother) has planned it all.” 

“I’ll write you lots, Harry, and tell you all about it. They have some really amazing museums and I’m hoping to do some research into some of the magical sites in Paris. I’ve only read about them, it’ll be really interesting to visit them. And of course, the food is divine.”

Harry felt a little glum. He was glad to escape the Dursleys for a bit—anything had to be better than dodging Dudley, but when he compared it to Hermione’s adventures, it felt bleak. He shook his head trying to dislodge the self-pity. 

Even with the sting of envy, something was comforting about Dr. Granger’s presence that made Harry a bit wistful that their journey was coming to an end. He wasn’t sure what it was. They hadn’t really talked much, beyond his desire to look into the Dursley’s neglect. 

Maybe that was it. 

Or maybe it was something about the way he sounded and smelled—his voice was comforting and strong and he had a clean, woody smell about him… like a strong tree that you could lean against and feel safe. Harry realized that he’d never felt that way about Uncle Vernon. He had only known fear and revulsion around him. 

Hermione’s lucky.

They were approaching the station (according to the announcements over the train and Hermione who was giving him a blow-by-blow description of pulling into the station). When it stopped, they stood up and Harry shook out his staff again, taking Hermione’s arm after looping his bookbag diagonally across his body.

[colemanaarohan1996]

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