#still didnt realise it was a dream at that point but i should have

[milf-harrington]

me @ my brain after having a hyperreslistic nightmrarish dream that felt like several hours but was in fact 5 minutes: "you think youre so funny"

[carpedzem]

hi

under the cut i want to talk a little bit, maybe overshare as well. ill try to keep it short (rereading nat here. i didnt). its a sad post, might make some of you angry but not for the reasons you think

i was staying away on purpose, but a few people asked about me so i wanted to let you know that hey, im lurking, im waiting to see what happens. maybe some things will change in the future but im putting it out here so its all in one place

i think i want to start with saying thank you again for sticking around, supporting my art and my thoughts and having discussions with me. i really opened up about myself and what I created here. im very anxious person and it influences my life on every level, so being heard, seeing people laughing at my jokes, loving my art has been so so important to me

about the situation, the gogcident if you will, i logged out as soon as i saw things going down and been getting updates though different source. and while situation is still on going and i dont know where it will go, as how it ends, theres two or three things im firm on that will always be true for me:

i really hate how believe all victims turns into believe everyone who speaks first, no matter what they say, no matter context, no matter proof. the first statement made in this case was untrue in a lot of important details and while i dont think caitis feeling are wrong or invalid i think her first statement made this situation into something it isnt. i think every victim should be heard but attacking everyone who was accused right away is not a solution

i do believe that everyone who was accused of anything has every right to defend themselves. the way its constantly taken away from dteam is not lost on me and its insane and upsetting

you can be traumatized by the events that werent in its core meant to be traumatizing. sometimes people act shitty and leave scars on you and sometimes you can do the same to other people

edited note bc i want this to be here as well: guilty until proven innocent is a crazy mindset and i cannot imagine situation that i would allow it. some idiots dont even realise how dangerous rhetoric that is. including accusers not being obligated to provide any proof of their claims

twt is the worst thing to deal with any discourse, misunderstanding or any delicate situation. i think no ones there cares for any victims period. i wish that place the worst

okay so what now. i havent decided yet. georges and dreams moves so far confirmed for me that no matter what happened it wasnt with malicious intentions. ill wait to see how this plays out and then ill decide about my next steps. one think i did for sure is i uninstalled twt from my phone (and that already bit my ass the moment dream started his space…) that part of fandom, both people who like (liked?) and hate dream is so damn self-destructive, toxic, manipulative and performative it wasnt worth it anymore. for here, i dont know yet. i dont hate dteam, i think this is very unfortunate and sad and complicated situation that left people very deeply hurt. and i wish it wasnt this way and im pretty sure dteam also wish that. but they cant change it and i cant change it even more

now this is something i dont really know how to tell you but let me try. i never mentioned this bc when i had those realizations, it was too late, everyone moved on and i felt stupid for dwelling on this. i feel stupid now, typing this. the thing is, drituation left me quite traumatized. fucking pathetic, i know. the sudden explosion of fandom left me really badly hurt. i lost a lot of people i genuinely believed to be friends with, and i miss them dearly. i felt, fuck it, still feel deeply betrayed by some of them. i dont want people guess who is who thats not the point, those people moved on long time ago. but that hurt has been really difficult to deal with, especially since realistically i know its quite stupid. crying over some people who were following me back for a few months? but i tried to let myself heal and grow love for this community again and i thought we will be okay. drituation felt like the end of the world but we got through it and I thought we are smarter. and well. im not trying to blame anyone or even a whole community, idk maybe i want to blame the universe for putting me here or society for working this way i dont know. but im hurting and i need to find a better way to deal with things going the wrong way. and it deeply upsets me but im afraid that i have to learn how to love you all less. and i honestly dont know yet what that means, how moving forward will look like. i dont have to make this decision now so i let myself stay away from social media for a while still and then go with presented situation the best i can. i dont try to make anyone responsible for my wellbeing i want to make this clear. im just trying to share my feelings and give you context for whatever happen in the nearest future. no matter what i need more healthy relationship not even with ccs but with community itself (and if you see me rebloging hazbin hotel fanarts. spare me...)

in this place i do want to state that no matter what i dont think dteam are bad people. im not closing myself at possibility of participating in the fandom, probably less though things i mentioned earlier. but if any of those things make you uncomfortable in any way, feel free to unfollow/softblock

im leaving my askbox open if anyone has anything to say, add, or idk, scream at me. not sure if i answer any tho. also if i delete this post in the next 10 minutes out of embarrassment then well, haha

on the final note i want once again thank you all for supporting me when i needed help for my cat. you all did something amazing, something i will never forget and i wish to hug everyone of you in person. thank you

see you around. one day. maybe tomorrow maybe in 10 days. idk

and if you are moving on in different direction, if we ever meet again, dont be a stranger

[helpallthenamesaretakenblog]

EPISODE 6 (just realised no one is asking me to do this too bad) spoilers for series up ahead

ITS NOT A MUSICAL EPISODE 😭

Disney was too broke to show us the animals in the zoo truck WHYY

why am i so happy for the second seaweed brain, man the things being a pjo fan does to you

The way you could see luke’s smile drop when they say that they found the lightning thief (:) —> :/)

The way luke didn’t even let them finish he was like “CLARISSE YES CLARISSE SHE MUST BE THE ROBBER”

No one’s talking about “Chiron should arrest her” Not the mental image of chiron holding a gun saying “ANY WORD CAN AND WILL BE USED AGAINST YOU IN COURT” while clarisse is pushed into a police car lollll

Old married couple im falling out of my chair plsssss if luke did something right in his life it was this

i love annabeth’s face like she knew this was coming the older brother-sister dynamic is POPPING

Disney really needed a way to show that grover liked animals and had convos with them without actually showing them lol

cue the “omg animals are so elegant” speech which served nothing at all

WHATS THE POINT OF ZEBRA TO VEGAS IF THERE AIN’T NO ZEBRA MR HOUSE OF MOUSE????

Idk but i kind of miss the trio action so far this show has only been percabeth + grover instead of percy + annabeth + grover you can tell they’re focusing more on fan service and developing percabeth than developing the more important dynamics which are the three of them having fun

oh HELLO RANDOM CAMEL WHO ISNT EVEN A ZEBRA BUT WHATEVER

“You are two seconds ahead of meeee” the simp eyes the simp eyes

The lotus casino from the outside is so COOL

LEVITATING BY DUA LIPA (some of yall still stuck in poker face era so im leaving it at that)

WISE GIRL I REPEAT WE GOT WISE GIRL (i was honestly expecting it to sound super corny on screen but walker pulled it off like he always does)

look im so mad about the fact that there’s no montage of them being silly little kids and having fun at arcade games. It hits so hard since percy has never afforded to visit fun places, annabeth has never left camp so is absolutely thriving with her architect games, grover is hunting down humans which was so funny and cool and they decided to make it more serious and plot centred

”ill take percy this way” WHY CAN’T GROVER TAKE PERCY THAT WAY HUH ANNABETH? 🤨 (girl just say you want to spend time with him)(and disney say you just wanna write more percabeth scenes)

I love the ‘if you dont know, i dont know either 😄’ mentality that percy has, he knows annabeth wants to be in charge now so he’s just feeding into the hubris

The augustus plot was so weird ngl but it was a great way to introduce the pan stuff

“Biaannncaaaaa biancaaaaaa” NICCOOOOOOO

He sounds so little and innocent and cute 🥺 im so sad now

GROVERRRRRR REMEMBERRRRRR

i gotta say, i guess that i was taken away by the people making fun of lin manuel miranda, but his acting was really really good

We got some may castellan exposition early

Percy thinking that the only thing he could do to sally was hurting her 🥹

i really hope they talk about that later on, you know we love some angst around here (especially with the dreams of the headmaster which was from the books!!! I was thinking that they’d cut it! But they didnt!! But it speaks volumes about percy that he has nightmares of headmasters)

I WANT ANNABETH FLASHBACK ANGST

annabeth pickpocketing the god of thieves will forever be her girlbossiest moment

”Im multitalented” percy: 😍💙🥰🥹 🤩(walker’s acting be that amazing is it not obvious by now that percy likes annabeth)

“Who’s grover ☺️?” “Wait, i know grover 😅!” Walker is cementing himself in the percy throne every single episode

”wow grover got really old😃”

“you lose sight of what’s important when you’re alone” “we weren’t alone 🥰” poor grover

The eons long wait to see how percy was hugging while falling the way down is finally over

The way that you can see percy’s empathy shining through his eyes as grover talked about pan>>>> (honestly tho, hug!)

the way they focused on percy’s reaction, i know this is going to be something he brings up as a reason for him to sacrifice himself for hades

Percy and annabeth looking at grover like “ ok mr. 24 DRIVE US”

Percy trying to drive a car will forever be cinema and comedy peak

The road rage this child has its so funny BEEP BEEP

annabeth: 😁 percy: 🥹 *cutely crashes car and almost kills her* PERCY IS TRULY GIVING A LOSER BOY WHO HAS NEVER HAD A GIRL LOOK AT HIM AND THATS SO PERCY OF HIM

the heartbreak in percy’s eyes alexa play the moment i knew by taylor swift

Four pearls?? *cue that one meme where that girl is calculating*

the way my smile faded when i saw annabeth hanging over the cliff TOO SOON RICK TOO SOON

[zeta-in-de-walls]

ctommys ending wasnt pointless, like i agree it wasnt the best and couldve been better, but if you really analyze it, there was a lot that worked quite well.

Ctommy got his closure in a way (finally getting his question of why cdream hurt him was answered). Finding out cdreams true motives which is something he always wnated to know

Seeing for himself that cdreams true motivations were true. He knew cdream was not making it up for once as he saw it for himself

Ctommy winning against cdream (and cpunz) , finally getting cdream to break as well as killing both cpunz and cdream. Cdream even feeling alone and betrayed before dying yet giving into ctommy beating him since he didnt try escaping and instead just stayed there and looked at ctommy. (Dying lonely just as what he had done to ctommy.) And yes ctommy died feeling like he had been too foolish and impulsive but both of these instances highlighted both characters flaws. Ctommy being too impulsive + stuck in the past to his downfall, and cdream being too stuck in an ends justify the means long term plans shit + stuck in past lead to his down fall.

it was important for cdiscduo to both die because both were stuck in a loop of this need for simplistic things whilst also having no shot of truley fixing things as things just were too far. Ctommy was planning to make a new country and was still thinking excessively about how cdream treated him in the past(not his fault), and cdream and cpunz were obsessed with that revival book and 'fixing the server'.

ctommy simply killing them after getting his closure and leaving wouldnt of fixed things exactly either cuz by that point it was just too late.

The s2 start was ok because it had what both cdiscduo wanted (simpler times again) even though past cdiscduo would of never known that things were reset. They never knew that they got what they wanted. And now all that sht is left to interpretation, there were hints that cdream in that new memory wipe thing still had some memories so people just can assume whatever. Since its never happening (which is for the best for obvi reasons), we can just speculate if one wanted too.

Tommy's DSMP ending was really bad.

Character with suicidal thoughts comes up with a plan that involves him dying. As a result, him and eveyrthing he loves dies.

His story had a theme about the importance of attachments and love and Tommy loses everything. Including all his memories. You don't burn memories. Even at his lowest during exile, the photos of Tubbo helped keep him sane.

Tommy's validation comes in the form of him coming to an understanding and literally seeing the one who so cruelly isolated him and deliberately made him think that he was worthless and promised to kill, to see his point of view.

On realising Dreams motives and winning against Dream, as I've said it really serves Dream's character more than Tommy's. Tommy is damaged by Dream and his arc should be about being able to move on from that pain and to make sure Dream can't hurt him again but instead he ends without his memories as Dream's friend.

It's fine that Tommy likes things simple but the comparison with Dream is not satisfying nor does it feel convincing in the stream itself.

What's the point of a character struggling to live and heal and become the best version of themselves if at the end of it they die by their own hand, with their last words being words of regret towards the one who hurt them?

[mihai-florescu]

enstars analyses uhmmm i think we should spend more time talking about what dreams mean to characters ^^ it is In The Name. but i mostly think about how ritsu's issues with emotional dependency and wilfulness, all this stuff where he plays up his emotionality (??) are both result of and like an.. acting out of ... trauma from being u know. a chronically ill kid. with an absent family? and literally like two people who would visit him? and the isolation he would understandably feel; and the dependence he would have on those only points of connection--and he can't control those--i think it's interesting and i love ritsu. it's like, sometimes he acts like he chose to be how he is but a lot of it is out of his hands. hi i hope the rest of ur day goes well :>

Disclaimer post writing an answer, my mind drifted away while writing and i ended up just kinda Pondering and Rambling. Im sorry if it seems a bit scattered and all over the place, that's my mind rn. Ok, let's see what i actually said now.

Sometimes i think about how the war wouldnt have played out the same had rei never left ritsu to try to find doctors and cures for him (which led to breaking the promise of staying with ritsu that ultimately changed everything in their relationship forever). I wonder if rei would have ever even been in the cemetary and met keito had he just stayed to take care of ritsu. I also wonder if keito and rei would ever bond about having someone dear to them be sick. And had rei stayed, ritsu wouldnt have been upset and willing to give eichi advice on how to take him down. Would there had even been a war if Keito hadnt met Rei, or if the student council hadnt figured out how to send rei away. Would rei even be a protagonist if he hadnt left ritsu, if he had just stayed home in obscurity as well (i dont think so, and the story is built on the existence of these extraordinary characters, by the characters who arent, but are willing to make their way into the narrative nevertheless and achieve their dreams) One action's ripple effects etcetc.

Sorry i realise this was got way off topic from your original ask. I think i will continue to be off topic because i cant stop the train of thought ive embarked upon at this tardy post midnight time. I think eichi and ritsu are an underrated duo... they helped each other take steps towards their dreams afterall. During checkmate eichi giving a harsh wakeup call to ritsu in regard to being in his brother's shadow unless he does something himself to prove he's alive (top 10 eichi mean moments where he's also projecting onto the other person his own issues... not that he was wrong, but still). And in black tea, ritsu advising eichi on the war preparations during tea club (a serene setting in what was otherwise a hellish place, a piece of an everyday normal students life, which eichi craved so much his whole life. And ritsu also needed the club, interacting with new people, let alone another chronically ill kid).

Im thinking about your last sentence and how ritsu clung to the vampire persona the family adopted, the way to cope with the hereditary disability. As opposed to rei who changed his persona and struggled with the way he was perceived as a monster, when he was a human just as much as everyone else and tried to ignore his disability even? I dont think ignore is the best word. Downplay. It was always the acknowledgement that ritsu had it worse, despite the fact that rei also had it, he was looking for a cure for ritsu instead. First instance and development of his habit of helping people when they dont necessarily even ask for it. But yes anyway millions of tangents aside, ritsu clinging on to the vampire persona tighter and more consistently in his character, as a coping mechanism with a condition he didnt ask for, that is outside his hands. The one thing that was in his power was choosing to play into the vampire persona.

I havent even touched on mao... to be fair i dont think im the most qualified person to speak on him, or his relationship with ritsu. I am still figuring out my thoughts on them. Im glad they grew to find their own dreams in yumenosaki (heh), in the same realm, but not tied to each other where it gets suffocating.

I wouldnt call anything i said analysis as i wouldve probably ordered things better and had, well, an actual point, but i hope my stream of conciousness was as fun for you to read as it was for me to just think and type

[suenitos]

The difference between the gender gap on dsmp and qsmp is that dsmp was an informal server where Dream invited friends or friends of friends. He also didn't invite large ish groups at once to join.

Whereas qsmp has a management team behind it, with groups of five added for the two new languages and presumably other languages (also I've heard Qs been in chats of german streamer begging them to join and basically pressuring the streamer into talking about it because chat then get sidetrack). Like Q had a plan for the server, theres an admin team and things that have to be planned out. Yet there was one woman initially and in the two times more people have been added, only one has been a woman. He told Forever that his team finds people, but like, he has to approve it. He can tell them to add more women if he actually cared. But it's not about diversity, its finding streamers with good numbers to add. And qsmp fans will try to add the eggs to the gap (which barely does anything to it) as if the eggs are essentially npcs that are supposed to leave.

Q fans will use the dsmp as a gotcha without realising that it was a criticized point for years. And dream did add more non male players and guess what, lore freaks drove new players away. Qsmp fans are literally the boobers of the qsmp divorce, who think they're better and try to seperate themselves from dsmp and end up being worse

this is really beautiful anonnie. i didnt consider that management point either because i dont really keep up with this aside from what the occasional person on the tl says about it but thats a good point. everything surrounding qsmp enjoys the freedom from critique dsmp and previous servers had against them which should be a sign of progress but it really isnt because the problems still exist which is fucked up! and going back to what i said initially its even worse because q sucks his own dick about the diversity on the server. even acknowledging his comment on it being a living breathing project its just so obviously not about the diversity or bringing communities together or whatever bullshit. fuck lore too just give me people hanging out on minecraft it does not need a whole production #slutsmps2

[adarkermiserablecrow]

I finally watched 6x11, 'In another life' and boy did some writer put their whole pussy into this one.

And I have Thoughts about this which I am gonna share with the class, because I have been crying/yelling at my tv/hysterically laughing for 45 minutes now, and if my neighbours are going to hate me, the least I can do is hop on here and be annoying.

It got really long and ramble-y so I'll put it under a cut.

1. Coma Buckley family: I think it's really interesting that, in the beginning, it's implied that the buckley parents dote on evan to daniel's detriment (''oh i didnt know you remembered he had a brother") but not neglecting him like they neglected Buck irl. Daniel seems well-adjusted, implied to be a caring doctor ("maybe you should listen to your patients") but also a bit aloof, oblivious (not noticing anything weird about doug - a bit more on that later). It does seem like a picture perfect family, on its surface, with bickering siblings and family dinners, but it sets up a very important theme that runs throughout the episode: this dream life, buck being a teacher and on good terms with his parents and having his brother be alive, comes at the expense of his ability to help. First and foremost, his ability to help his sister escape, offer safe haven, because in this reality he never left PA. And later on in the episode, people insist that he has the ability to fix anything in the coma, but that was disproved at the very beginning when he tried to help maddie and failed, and failed to get daniel to help. From the get go, we see that even in here, not everything is fixable, and we're told this later on as well, when bobby says 'you cant bring me back to life in this dream'. The point here is that at the beginning we're dealing with buck who wants the happy family he never knew as a child, the neglected kid who wishes his parents would be the kind of people that they were in the dream, happy and involved in his life. But at the end, having been through the rest of the dream, it's his parents in their new shiny caring version that try to hold him back, it's his parents dragging him down. But, this is his subconscious, so in reality, it's that wish of having a happy family and the resentment towars his parents that is dragging him down, and he recognises that, and he forgives them, because thats the only way he can move on, return to life. Many people complain about the parents' redemption, and maybe ill change my mind when i watch the rest of the season, but I dont think it was a redemption for them. It was all on buck, he forgave them, he chose to move past it, and let them into his life. In the end, back in the real world, his parents still don't really listen to him, when he says his apartment is fine, he does not need a couch. Buck tells maddie he doesn't mind them. That doesnt mean they're meant to have changed, Buck is the one who changed. And, the choice to go hard on the father/son dynamic with bobby, and buck telling daniel his family is different out there, adds a layer: he doesn't really view them as his parents anymore. He doesn't get hung up on it now, but he lets go of the idea that they would ever be the doting family he needed as a child, and recognises that he found that family elsewhere. He accepts them as people in his life, and rejects them as parents. It ties into Chimney's storyline with his own father, how Chim and Buck both move toward forgiveness, and it also ties back to the sperm donor storyline and the argument between chim and buck's fathers. The point of the buckleys' 'redemption' is that buck forgives, even if he does not forget.

2. Buck's other fixes: it has been established that this all happens in buck's subconscious. The way he slowly realises the impact his life has had on others is just... The starting point is maddie and yeah I said that already, but then he finds chim and hen pretty much the same, and he assumes the only person he's ever helped is maddie. But then he finds out about bobby and eddie, and it occurs to him for the first time ever that he helped them too, got them out of a tough spot. It's not a sure thing that things would have turned out that way in buck's absence, but the point here is for him to realise that he helped, he was needed. It's particularly strong with Bobby, who appears like a little psychopathic gremlin in the dream, drinking here and there and guzzling down pills, and essentially tells buck that, in the dream, he can fix almost anything. And it all snowballs into buck realising he helped bobby, essentially by annoying him. And it's so important that at the end of the 'i made you mad and i made you laugh sometimes' speech, bobby calls that 'being buck', because it's essentially saying that buck helped bobby just by being himself. Again, this is the way buck's mind conjures it up, but it's no less important that he comes to the conclusion that being himself was enough. That he doesn't need to be someone else to help the people he loves (and to me that sentiment calls back to s4, him climbing that crane to protect everyone, and bobby saying that's who he is - not a compliment).

3. Eddie. This part may be the buddie shipper in me getting high on copium, but I think eddie's absolute absence from the dream was connected to him never stepping foot in buck's room irl, except to bring in chris. I mean, in the coma buck was with chim, irl chim is by his bedside. Coma, he's talking with bobby, irl bobby has busted out the rosary beads. It wasnt a hard rule as far as I can tell, though we know buck had some awareness of the room and the goings on, he could hear them (thats why i think the copium might play a part in this paragraph). But also, it feels so important that the people who tell buck explicitly to come back and get better are essentially proxys. Athena on behalf of bobby and Chris on behalf of eddie. And, in the coma, Eddie does not physically appear, but he is the first flash of irl buck remembers (not chim, but eddie's 'go get em') and also, of course, the last 'fix' of buck's, bringing the total of people he helped in a big way to three: maddie, bobby, and eddie. Doesnt really tell us anything about buddie, but it does reinforce the strong relationship between the characters, platonic or not. (Also, eddie 'pain is weakness' diaz crying even a single tear in public feels like a Big Thing).

4. Daniel. Honestly? The chase in the end of the episode and the subsequent argument between buck and daniel (who, yes, is also buck, but ill keep calling daniel to avoid confusion) might be one of my favourite scenes in the entire show. Maybe one of my favourite scenes in any tv show ive watched. First off, that part of buck represents essentially every self worth issue he has. It's the part of him that is the most broken, tells him he isn't needed, isn't wanted, he's spare parts that turned out defective (a sentiment buck has expressed out loud in s4 and it was the 118 reassuring him he is much more than spare parts). And all of this stems from buck's childhood, so it makes sense that it took on the appearance of daniel, since daniel was the source of it all, through no fault of his own, even long before buck knew of his existence. It's daniel's death that brings on the grief that swallows the buckleys and leads to buck's childhood being the way it was. Things would have been different had daniel survived, or so buck believes. Beyond that, daniel's ignorance of maddie's situation reflects on buck blaming himself for not seeing that his sister was suffering (which buck even says out loud in the kitchen scene in this episode). And, when the switch flips, daniel becomes buck, the part of buck that is broken and hateful not to others but to himself, buck borrows a lesson from bobby and manages to break free of his own low self worth. I dont think thats the end of that, but buck's jourmey this episode was all about realising that he is needed, so he could look in the mirror in this scene and say no, you're wrong, they don't want me gone, they care about me. And, as someone who deeply relates to having that voice in your head, and to buck in general, it's so powerful to see a character manage to overcome that. It's so powerful to see buck, textbook people pleaser that he is, realise that he's talking to himself and say 'oh you're me. I dont have to feel bad about not listening to you', and use the first real artifact of firefighting we've seen in the coma dream to break free and return to his life, his real family. And, oliver stark's acting in this scene, whew - buck being confused and emotional but still relentless in pursuing his goal, and the other buck being cold and cruel and also relentless in his insistence that he is just not worth it, not needed. Just - chef's kiss. I cant really explain how much that scene spoke to me, because it is tangled up in how much I relate to buck as a character, and thats a whole other can of worms.

5. Random things. I appreciated that the traumatic events that happened to buck over the course of the show were at least acknowledged. Given that most of the other characters (barring chim, I think) have had storylines about dealing with trauma, it's a bit glaring that buck never really did. Sadly, I think it's too late for that now, aside from if they do something with the lightning going forward. But I am glad they were mentioned, because the man went through a bombing and a tsunami within six months of each other, and it was never really talked about. The bombing led into the lawsuit plot and then was resolved, and the tsunami trauma storyline was about chris (not complaining, it's just how it was). I do wish those traumas had been explored, but I really do think we're past that point and am happy we're at least acknowledging them. (Also, the implication that the tsunami left him so deeply traumatised that it's present in his parents' coma house, supposedly a safe haven from everything real, as a ferris wheel that 'doesnt fit with anything' because trauma stands out in your mind, im-).

Another thing is the lighting, the cold, grey hues of the real hospital, versus warm colour in the coma dream which gradually gets colder the closer buck gets to waking up, and the return of warm lighting in the end, when buck wakes up in the hospital and his family is there to see him. Also, people irl dressed in drab, muted colours, vs. the characters in the dream being more vibrant, esp buck in that green sweater which btw was a gold star choice from the costume department.

Basically everyone put their whole pussy into this, from the writers to the crew to the actors, and while it's not the only time this has happened, I'm really glad it did.

The end. Pretty much. Ive probably managed to forget some things, and maybe I was Captain Obvious abour others, and wrong about some, but this episode made it right to the top of my list of favourites right away, and it'll probably keep me up tonight lmao. Thanks for coming to my TED talk, hope it made sense.

[dirt-str1der]

This is gonna keep me up at night i cannot believe that people dont like saejima like i didnt even reallse this was going on i was too caught up in the bliss of finally having a protagonist with bigger titties than kiryu and constantly wears an expression that looks like hes attending a funeral. Like i didnt even see the y4 scene as saejima it was so uncomfortable and felt so .. shoehorned in. Like theres nothing about saejima that ever made a callback to that scene ever again, it came out of fucking nowhere and then its revealed later on that saejima adores kids his childhood dream was to become a kindergarden teacher he loved his little sister like crazy and if they truly wanted saejima to pin haruka so badly they could have made it because he looked at her and saw yasuko and didnt want to look away. Saejima Was and Should Be portrayed as wild and desperate during that scene but not because of ??? Lust ??? Suddenly being overcome by female pheromones ??? Its because he was so scared and cornered and he knows that hes intruding on this perfect little family and its either him or them , and if he doesnt stop haruka now then she’s going to blow the whistle and have her dad come running and then its the end for him, hes going back to jail and theyre going to kill him in there and hes never going to see yasuko or majima or anyone else ever again. If saejima grabs haruka and bowls her over and ends up on top of her , hes not going to start shaking because shes a feeeemale its because he realises that his impulsive tackle has already painted him as dangerous in her mind and shes not gonna want him around anymore and he cant let her go now because shes going to call kiryu and if he wants to escape then he has to shut her up and go for her dad next and he really really doesnt want to have to kill them because they saved him and haruka is staring up at him with gigantic eyes, hes dripping cold sweat and he sees his sister and saejima lets go of her and resigns himself to going back to jail because he cant do it, he cant hurt her. Haruka scrambles to her feet and she saejima expects her to run but she stays in the room with him and neither of them know what to say to each other and Thats when kiryu, whos checked and double checked for any plausible explanation that wouldnt point to saejima being an escaped convict and found none, enters the room from where hed been monitoring the situation with his fists balled up, he unclenches his hands and he pretends like he hadnt seen anything and sends haruka on her way on a chore of little importance so he can have a private chat with saejima and kiryu sits at the entrance of the room, leaving his back open to saejima as they have their introductory speech and saejima is like fuckkk this is the guy i was supposed to look for, gives kiryu the fakest name ever (which kiryu thinks is genius), saejima gets more and more hyped and he concocts his shipwreck story and they end up on the beach as saejimas explaining the ship i worked on crashed and im the only survivor and i need to get to kamurocho pleasee give me money how much could one banana cost ? Ten dollars? And kiryus like Oh man, youve been in prison a long time... he says knows he broke out of prison and saejima realises he still let him see his back so that he knows that kiryu means no harm and as they talk saejima understands why hamazaki was so shaken by his encounter with kiryu , he doesnt know that kiryu approached hamazaki without once considering he had a knife clutched in his fist but he saw kiryu flagrantly leaving his back open to a dangerous criminal not because he thinks that saejima cant hurt him but because he trusts that saejima wont hurt him. Kiryu was giving him a chance to redeem himself, but his stomach sinks when he hears that kiryu will only help him if hes going to turn himself in and he tells him, fucking begs him, because he has no other option, either kiryu gives him the money or he takes it from him and kiryu keeps saying no and saejima is losing it a little he casts aside kiryus camaraderie wait look at this

Anyway he is trying to be as scary as possible in order to shake kiryu down but its not gonna work and they start to circle each other, sizing each other up, and with each step saejimas exhaustion and pain fades away, his limp disappears and his heart starts to race because kiryus not fighting him for the sake of it, this is a test he says, saejima has to prove to him how bad he wants that money. He doesnt have to kill them, kiryus giving him an out here, letting him do what he does best and if its a fight he wants then a fight he will get

[tears-of-boredom]

i want to be dead. but you know, in that passive way where its just kind of a fact. im pretty sure its just my womanly hormones talking but i really dont see myself ever getting out of this mud. metaphorical mud i mean. im like laying in mud, and sometimes i manage to stand up,, but you know, im still standing in it, and covered in it. and eventually i fall back down. you know i seemingly really like to make up stupid metaphors. i have no idea why, maybe it makes me feel smart.

im tired. tomorrow i have a driving lesson. my first one. ever. im not really worried for myself, i just feel like the teacher is going to be dissapointed in me or something.

ive been having annoying dreams. in the last one i was smoking with my sibling and i talked to them about how ive been having so many dreams where ive smoked. i hate that my dreams do that. reference other dreams as if they arent dreams themselves. makes it harder to wake up ya know. i wish id have a positive dream for once. amybe one about moving on my own and getting away from this family finally. or more like just getting away from mom. shes literally the only one i want to be away from.

ive been decorating my room. setting up shelves and buying trinkets from kontti. it kind of halted because i couldnt figure out why our nail gun wasnt accepting the nails i was putting in it, and then i couldnt find any other kind. and i didnt want to ask mom for help. and also i decided to do the net thing, which is the main thing, cuz ill hang shit from it. i guess i could hammer a hook into the wall for a painting...but the point was that ive been thinking about the fact that if i wanna move before im 18, all this decoration ive been planning wont have the opportunity to be up for that long. but also that was the reason that ive literally never felt comfortable decorating my room, even when the ones that were completely my own. and i decided that this time im not gonna make that mistake and just decorate if i want to, no thinking about how itll have to be taken down eventually.

anyways im just really sad, and i visited my sister recently and i was really close to crying just because her apartment seemed so safe and so much like it was hers. and i like really want that for myself. and im just sad. and i dont wanna go to the driving lesson tomorrow. not because i dont wanna go to the lesson itself, but because i feel like ill be like at my worst, and thus wont get that much out of it.

i really want to get out of this house. when we were moving, there was like two weeks where me and my brother spent the nights at this new apartment, while mom slept at the old one, just because our trips to school would be much shorter. and those two weeks felt like heaven honestly. i didnt even realise why i felt so good and happy, until mom started sleeping here as well, and all the joy drained from me in an instant.

i dont know how to express to the adults in my life how much i want to live on my own. because im just a child. a fifteen year old child. and living with a different adult wont work. it has to be alone. i can promise you that when i fucking get that apartment, no matter how small or shitty, i will cry tears of happiness and relief.

im hesitant to even type these words but: maybe i should talk to my mom about this. just tell her that i really want to move out. no feeling-sharing needed.

i wanna go skydiving without a parachute. soar through the air for the first and last time in my life.

i wish i could fly. ive wished that for a long time. i remember wishing it ever vacation i had to spend up north. and everytime i spent a recess alone in the school yard.

i hate that im crying just because im menstruating. it makes me feel like my emotions arent true. not like i trust my emotions to be true any other fucking time.

why is life like this. why do so many people get to live so easy lives and then i have to do this shit.

ohhkay i just felt the urge to go get a knife so im not going to feed my own anger.

im tired.

its weird because i do dissociate clearly, but its always more liek just, my body seems weird, and it feels realy creepy how my body just moves when i want it to. and i feel like im just watching through someone elses eyes. it cant be me whos so good at typing. im clumsy, i struggle with guitar chords and mute the wrong strings. why are my hands so soft. it feels really gross to be in this body. but still, in the back of my head i know that im ust making this all up in my head. because who the fuck else is this. of course its my finger that are typing my thoughts out.

even my fucking ring looks weird and foreign.why does my skin have a texture. why are humans os fucking gross.why do i have to feel things.

oh my god im driving myself into a fucking meltdown right down im going to force myself to stop.

[seyvetch]

I will never forgive current government for destroying all my dreams for better Russia I doubt anyone will forget this war in the next 50 years

I still dont even get why it happened. The political and economic drawbacks which are obviously would happen concidering all the sanctions Russia got before the war for doing less in Ukraine are much more than any gain I can imagine. Brainwashing and lying to your population and especially the army they are sending to kill and die about why youre doing this especially makes this shitty. So many people believed trully that they were going to help people of Ukraine or something along those lines or didnt even know they were going to war. This is sick. So many people were killed who wanted to protect their home by people who blieved they were liberating them... For what?? A bit of land? To make our enemies fear us again? They made so many people die only to make their own sitizens suffer as well.

I thought about suicide more times since the war started than in total in last year or so before it bc I was so fearful that I might be drafted which fun fact I can be during war even tho Im technically not viable due to my mental state being a wreck and also being so depressed about this situation. First came economic sanctions then I realised just how much itll affect every citizen when such mondane things as microtransactions in Warframe - a game which I was relying on for like half a year to keep myself sane were not working since almost every way of payment wasnt working in Russia. I realised just how much of an impact to the Russian economy it was. Then almost a full out fucking war came on Russian culture and history (much of which is shared by other slavic nations btw) came. Ive been trying to share it for years bc of how good and underapriciated it was and then bc of actions of current government shit like redacting the name of THE FIRST MAN IN SPACE came. Then Warframe's developer company Digital Extremes or DE for short decided themselves that players from Russia and Belarus wont be able to do microtransactions. I cant convey how devistated I was from a thing that any other "normal" person would just be annoyed at. This game was almost all I was thinking about for months, it helped me not to go too insane or depressed for about half a year as I mentioned earlier, I was dependant on it to be happy at the time. I felt like I was stabbed in my back. I spent most of my savings on this game which wasnt a lot but still. And then at my lowest point at the time, already crushed by the current situation a punshiment for a crime someone else commited, a crime I was against and had no choice in came on me and many other faithful players in my shoes. It just kinda broke me. To my brain by doing something like this it was almost like saying I am responsible afterall punishment should ony come to guily. It didnt help that many people in the games community suppported this decision. I felt like I was going insane like the world was crumbling around me. And I couldnt even bring myself to play a game I relied on for moral support for so long.

Well this is the situation from my point of view. I wish that I was in the worst situation that came out of this shitshow bc I cant bring myself to imagine anyone dealing with something worse. And people do have it worse than me bc of what my government did. I wish I could strangle every single one of people who approved of this in the government myself. But even if I did that the situation wouldnt change. Even if I do feel guilty for feeling bad and venting about this in this situation I hate people who told me to "put things into perspective" bc my suffering was less than sufffering of others. An analogy comes to mind when people say that. A person is strapped to a seat in the back of a car and cant escape, the driver of the car is speeding up to ram into another car despite your protests. The driver than rams into another car killing and injuring people inside while you get less injured bc you were in the backseat. Does that mean that you should be prosecuted for murder as well just for being in the cat that was rammed intentionally into anther car causing death? Or that your injuries shouldnt be treated on the same principle and bc other people have it worse?

I recognise the nessecety of some of the actions but I am outraged just how far people are taking it in "protest of Russia's current actions". Whyd my german friend's bike tires were slashed several times just because he was born in Russia even if he moved to Germany long before he turned 18? Why are exhibits in museums that are Russian are being rid off? Why was the name of Юрий Гагарин, the first human in space was redacted in official documents during some large confirence??? Even thought he died long before Putin became president.

I feel a bit better after venting thanks for reading if you did read it.

[daughterearth]

Tw. Don't read ahead.

All disconnected points. I realised my chasing after this dream because I want to prove to myself that I can do stuff and be worthy of finally being loved. Being an intern doctor now isn't enough,I should get into civil services because I feel so inferior in everything. Now I'm realising I'm still not okay. Maybe I need the pills. Fuck. I need the money and stability the job brings more than anything to afford costly therapy for myself. My psychiatrist just didnt care. Neither do my parents. I still have a very weird realtionahip with food with me crying when I am not satisfied eating, there is a lot of shame. I get so many destructive urges - blasting music till it pains, rubbing my eyes, isolarinf myself, getting super angry at mundane stuff, like bringing pain to myself. Gets disorienting and wild inside my head and body. Fuck all this. I feel alone and more number than before. I really have deep childhood trauma which affected me in my formative years and I need to work through that. It's showing up as headaches and back aches and weight gain for no reason. All the creepy rapey male undertones with the guys I use sto work with just inflamed my system further. I don't feel safe or secure at all. And my body is reacting to that. Shit man. Idk what I'm going to do.

[luflowerstuffs]

SPOILERS OF Multiverse of madness

What i wish there was in multiverse of madness:

-A arc of doctor strange helping America with her powers until the climax scene of "you can"

-Wong fighting Wanda( at least trying to) more then just passing out over and over because he fell on something. Also the other people at the temple who survived should comeback and help wong to stop the scarlet witch while Stephen helps America

-A loki tva and sylvie cameo. Doctor strange, scarlet witch and the other main chracters didnt need to acknowledge them. Could just be loki, tva and sylvie looking scared in different points. Would be a wonderful way of Sylvie realising she f* up.In my mind would be quick, easy, would be a free ad for Loki and Loki season too yet at the same time would still make sense because the multiverse was open there. Would make more sense then bring the captain england

-Scarlet witch's " i want to be happy". Yes Wanda was doing it for her kids in her mind but at some point is repetitive because at one point all she says is "a mother would do that" and despide being her motivation i think after sometime become weak easy to the person watching want to argue with. So for me she should also say things like "i want to finally be happy" because it is true and a bit more easy to identify and mirror Doctor Strange "am i happy?" arc.

- "You broke the rules and become the hero" the best example for wanda to bring up was Captain America. He came back in time to live the he wanted. Would be a powerful argument even if the multiverse is different from comeback in time would make the question "why not" more rich

- more struggle in the final scene with the scarlet witch. It comes off as too easy to stop her for a moment so Doctor Strange can help america. Her minions from darkhold temple were kinda useless? More for the jumpscare when they appear?

-a actual fight between Scarlet witch and Xavier. It was too easy. Scarlet witch is powerful but it looks like they bring him just to say some important lines and kill him as if he was weak?

-something else other than Reed Richards( The most inteligent man on earth) saying "this man will kill you when he open his mouth" so wanda would know exactly what his power is for Wanda to win against black Bolt. Wanda is so powerful in the rest of the movie she should be able to discover with the other wanda memories or be capable of blocking it for a while when he attacked even with some struggle than making his mouth disapear

- the book of everything good shouldnt be brand that. If such a good power was alt there shouldnt be more people going after it before? It serms so deus ex machina even if end up not being used to solve the problem. Still doesnt help to make it believable instrad would be better branded as the book of counterspells to darkhold. Seems the same thing and it serves the same purpouse but the same change make it looks much more specific to that evil and we know marvel gad a ton of evil entities. Also we could put a line they were trying to find it and america describing when she seus it would make them realize when it could be

-the multiverse didnt look so limited? I dont know if it is because it is still expanding or what but i feel they simplified the multiverse in this movie? They let out a notion that very dream is a multiverse and that is it. Even if we met someone specialist in the multiverse the redheaded Christine and have a lot of very inteligent characters. Also in this movie we only met people that are the same in different multiverses. Yes we met different version of captain marvel and captain america but they arent Carol denvers and Steve Rogers. We already knows this happens because of no way home and loki. Seems weird it doesnt happen in the movie called multiverse of madness.

- show why lose Christine is so important to Stephen. Yes it was a sacrifice but how much he loves her is not really on the 1 movie and this movie acts as we already know but we dont. So at some point becomes wanda"im a mom" line that is repeat. But i think his motivation makes sense i love his reflection if he is happy but then i think we should get flashbacks in what he lost in his past life as a normal person specially the good moments with Christine and moments he f* up maybe even having the classic if im not married with X years we get married

-the other Wanda and wanda kids try to fight Wanda or at least they try to defend themselfs when america makes wanda go to their dimension or/and we know why the lack of powers. I read that the other wanda had her powers taken away from her but this wasnt on the movie and doesn't explain the kids lack of showing their powers. Doesnt mean they would succeded but would make the situation even worse to Wanda. Also specially in a world with real superheroes would makes sense kids of their age try to act like the superheros of this situation for their mom against her "evil twin"

-Wandas "Death" wasnt as big as i wish it. Ok she will be back but should be more impactful i mean at least we saw a person going crazy and having another bad day for her collection of traumas. The "death" being more impactful should help to say this arc ended to then cut to things back to status quo. Honestly the whole movie almost looks like a bigger movie than marvel wish it was? Like yes Scarlet witch the multiverse deaths doctor strange wants to be more selfish and america chavez is still lonely but lets put random cameos just because it and dont forget wanda is a mom and doctor strange is heart broken because his ex girlfriend(we dont know much about) married and america chavez out of nowhere controls her powers now and insert marvel jokes but it doesnt make much sense to me because we had civil war that was under the solo brand of captain america and still the feeling of this IS a bigger movie of marvel like avengers( in this case they seemed to try to make it smaller? Im really interested in what was going on in producers minds with this movie)

Things that i liked

*i loved the horror movie aspect

*doctor strange and scarlet scenes together. They had a really interesting dynamic. Wish we get more scenes of them in the future.

*Benedict Cumberbatch was amazing as always

*America Chavez was charismatic

* i liked the paint and the comics dimension was a amazing reference to marvel comics where this chracters were born

* i like the dark hold is destroyed specially by a sacrifice

*i like how doctor strange is trying to be happy instead of being so selfless. It is very human and interessing ending for a marvel movie. By consequence america also end up without her father figure because he was thinking about himself to realize she didnt want him to leave her. Again very human and a interessing status quo.

* i like that Strange bow down to Wong

*I think the best cameo was captain marvel because it was different interessing and she was a good opponent to wanda. Maybe the fight could be just a bit longer? But compared with the others she had the best fight with scarlet witch and it makes sense with her chracter.

I really liked the movie i love the 2 main characters but the script wasnt as refined as i think it should be specially for a movie so many fans wanted which is a pity( i think one or 2 rewrites with a good revisor would help a lot). Most marvel movies rely heavily in cgi( which is not bad because of the genre) but i think they are being kinda careless with it? They know the fans will eat it up so just do whatever with the time we have and saying this i dont wanna blame the cgi people because i know they are being pushed hard nowdays so i think disney should give them more time and maybe more people too. Hope disney is gonna put a extended cut in the streaming maybe it would help. This movie honestly deserved more time in my opinion

[6sakusa]

hello i see requests are open 🥺 can you write an angst to fluff with suna 💞💞 maybe som ething related to birthdays/anniversary’s, or just feel free to take creative liberty. thank you i love your work 😖💞

“birthday” suna rintarō.

a/n : i hope you enjoy, if so please support by liking & reblogging <3

warnings : angst, implications of a toxic relationship, mild swearing, me not proof reading sorry.

you had been sitting against the hardwood chair for hours now, it felt pointless to even count, time was blurring slowly and you couldn’t help but fade away with it. you would have never imagined your day would go like this, from the moment you had woken up your boyfriend suna hadn’t been in bed next to you, granted that was something you were used to. however, you thought today would be different, considering it was your birthday.

since suna went pro he seemingly had less and less time for you but you could tell he was making as much as an effort as possible, that’s probably the reason that you failed to address it multiple times regardless of the way it had been eating away at you. how could you get in the way of your boyfriends dreams? he had finally accomplished everything he had wanted since high school, he was playing for a division one team, he had the apartment he’d been dreaming of, the car he had saved on his pinterest board since he was seventeen, and now even though he never cared for fame he was definitely famous.

and you were there for the entire ride, you were there when he first decided to try out for inarizaki’s volleyball team in first year, even though you weren’t dating then you still encouraged him to go for it. you were the one who showed up to his first practice to ease his nerves even though he tried to act brave. you were there when he went to nationals for the first time, the look in his eyes was indescribable, it was beautiful and it’s when you knew that you were slowly falling in love with suna. you were there when he lost his first official game comforting him as much as you could. you were there in second year when he lost against karasuno, you were there when he got his first girlfriend advising him what to get her even though you were completely whipped over him. yes, you were always by his side, thankfully the two of you made things official in third year.

but now looking back thinking on all of it you realised one thing you had never even considered is that this would happen, that once suna achieved everything you would no longer be his priority. you weren’t going to lie to yourself, it hurt, it seriously hurt. especially when you had been anticipating him to leave atleast a note wishing you a happy birthday saying he would be back in a couple hours to celebrate with you. but no, there wasn’t even that. no note, no text, no phone call, nothing.

and here you thought you would take the burden off his hands by planning something for the day, you had spent hours preparing a three course meal knowing that once suna was back from practice he would be on the verge of knocking out, the last thing you wanted was him dragging himself to some fancy resturant across town at your benefit. yet, it didn’t matter how much you considered his feelings since he wasn’t even here to show an ounce of gratitude.

it was taking everything in you to hold in your tears, had he really forgotten? even his own teammates had taken the time to text or call you to wish you a happy birthday, but right now it was anything but that.

what probably hurt the most was the crushing realisation of how unimportant you were becoming in his life, why were you even still in it? did he even want you around, even if he does then that didn’t mean you should necessarily stay, afterall it was becoming clearer and clearer that you deserved better even if you cursed the thought of saying it outloud. well, you atleast deserved someone who could remember your special day.

your head darted to the door as you heard the sound of keys and the lock clicking, it was almost as if suna’s very presence could pull you out of any trance.

“rin?” you smiled, why were you smiling? you shouldn’t be smiling. were you really so hopelessly infatuated with your boyfriend that you would let all your thoughts melt away at the sight of him alone? come on now, this is disappointing.

you deserve better.

you launched yourself into his arms in which he embraced you tightly, it wasn’t anything special, he did it everytime he had come home to you, but you couldn’t help but feel butterflies in your stomach as if you were still in your honeymoon phase when it came to rintarō.

“are you hungry? i made some food.” you pulled away taking a glance at his face, even when you were right in front of him it didn’t even seem like he was acknowledging your presence. his eyes were trailing between empty space, not even looking down at you. you couldn’t help but sigh to yourself, why had you gotten so excited?

“nah.” he shook his head attempting to make his way over to your shared bedroom. he looked tired and you weren’t surprised, afterall being a pro player was no easy task but you hoped at the very least that he would say something. secretly you were hoping that this was all some shitty prank that he decided to play on you and any second now he would jump out saying happy birthday and offering to spend some time with you.

“but rin i-“ you could barely finish your sentence before he decided to cut in with a tone so sharp that it was offensive.

“not now y/n, i’m not in the mood.” he sighed.

“i understand that but-“

“are you really going to keep talking? don’t start this clingy shit right now i said i’m not hungry.” and with that he didn’t even bother turning around, not even one glance at the food you had prepared before he disappeared down the hallway.

oh.

so he really had forgotten, even though the two of you would joke around a lot you knew he would never take things this far. not to the point where your eyes were glued to the floor and it felt like you couldn’t breathe because of the way your heart was literally breaking in your chest, not to the point where it felt like the person who you deemed the most important on the planet didnt give a shit about you.

suna clicked his tongue running his hands through his hair in exasperation as he thought about the way he just treated you. truly, he didn’t know what his problem was, there was just so much pressure on him lately and it seemed to be building up from every corner of his life, except from you, so why did he always take things out on you? the one he cared about most? the one he would do anything for? maybe it’s because he knew there would be no serious consequences, or so he thought. regardless, he would apologise to you soon when he calmed down, you didn’t deserve all the shit he was putting you through and he would make sure you knew exactly what you meant to him.

but what he didn’t know is how you were standing in the kitchen with a hole in your heart. there wasn’t much you could do now, he barely let you speak and you weren’t really up to reminding him of the fact it was your birthday, especially if he didn’t care to hear it.

you sighed making your way to the fridge pulling out a chocolate cake, you had gotten it because you knew it was suna’s favourite flavour and he was particularly picky when it came to cakes even though it was your birthday.

“i might as well still celebrate.” you mumbled to yourself, tears making their way down your face. maybe for another day you could pretend that everything was okay.

you picked up some candles from the drawer and stuck them into the cake softly, it was a miracle how you could still keep your composure regardless of what had just happened. sighing you lit them up, in a way it was such a tragic sight to see. in everyone else’s eyes you had everything you could have ever wanted in life, people looked up to you and yet here you were, feeling like the most lonely person on the planet.

“happy birthday to me.” you whispered with a sad smile and glossy eyes before blowing out the candles.

tragic indeed.

“y/n?” suna turned the corner raising an eyebrow at your state. he could tell you were crying and as much as it hurt him it also shocked him, he had said mean things to you before but you didn’t usually cry over them even though they clearly caused you pain. it took everything in him not to hit his head against the wall right now, you were in this state because of how he dismissed you.

you looked up at him, your eyes were void of the excitement they held when you had saw him earlier and he took note of it. “oh rintarō, do you want cake?” your tone was curious but your expression was deadpan, and to suna it was scary.

“i came to apologise.” he began making his way towards you glancing at the cake several times, why were you blowing out candles?

that’s when it hit him. what day is it today? he wasn’t sure he hasn’t been very perceptive of time lately but he did know it was your birthday month.

his heart dropped.

had he really neglected you this much lately that he had forgotten your own birthday? and he had the audacity to call himself your boyfriend.

“y/n, i’m so sorry i don’t know how i forgot-“

“save it rin, i see things clearly now, thank you.” you turned to make your way out of the kitchen but he was onto you before you were even able to.

“you see things clearly? what do you mean? y/n, i know i’ve been a shitty boyfriend lately and forgetting your birthday is unforgivable but please don’t say what i think you’re about to.” he clenched his jaw pulling your hand into his chest.

“what do you want me to do? ealier you didn’t even let me speak, is it something i did? do you hate me?” you asked with tears streaming down your face, you couldn’t pretend anymore.

“no, no, don’t ever think that, you’re perfect, you’re everything i could ever ask for, you’re not the problem you never have been.” he embraced you, wrapping his arms so tightly as if the moment he let go you would be gone.

“so why don’t you care about me anymore?” the broken tone in your voice was sending suna off the rails, he couldn’t believe he was the cause of this, he hated himself.

“that’s not true, i do care about you, i love you, you’re everything to me, you don’t even know how much you mean to me.” he pulled away to cup your face, this time you could see the sincerity in his eyes, the genuine interest, the adoration. “fuck, i’ve just been under pressure and i’ve taken it out on you, i can’t even tell you how sorry i am.”

“give me another chance to be better to you y/n, please don’t leave me i can’t live without you.” he fell to his knees, still holding your hand in his.

“rin-“

“please” he begged, a look of anguish prominant on his features as if he expected you to say no.

“get up rin.” you watched as he rose slowly, anxiety engulfing him as he couldn’t anticipate your answer. “i’ll give you another chance, always.”

“thank you.” he kissed your forehead before bringing you back into his arms.

“what are you doing?” you frowned watching as he brought out his phone and began texting.

“i just told my coach i’m taking a week off, i swear i’ll make this up to you, happy birthday y/n.”

you smiled at the thought of having your boyfriend to yourself for an entire week for the first time in ages, maybe your birthday wouldn’t be so bad afterall.

“tell me what you want princess, anything at all.. do you want to go out of the country? you wanted to see paris right?”

you chuckled at his words as he wiped your tears, looking at you with eyes full of love. “i don’t care what we do, as long as i’m with you.”

“well first how about i have cake with the love of my life?” he turned to the chocolate cake on the dining table before relighting the candles. “how about you do this properly this time hmm?”

“i would like that.” you smiled.

[underneaththe-waterfall]

How do I put up with you?

Why is there barely and Bambam angst ?like anywhere?😖

summary: You and bambam have an argument as he says you are buying to many clothes. You both end up having an argument which leads to Bambam fucking you until you fall asleep.

CONTAINS: ANGST  , SMUT , FLUFF. ALSO  (hair pulling and oral sex )

F/N= friends name

“WHAT DO YOU MEAN I BUY TO MANY CLOTHES” you say sitting on the couch with your arms crossed and an expression on your face that was starting to scare Bambam. This whole thing started when Bambam saw you walk into the house with like 6 bags of clothes and an extra bag full to the brim with makeup. Its not that Bambam doesn’t like it when you shop and neither is he stingy , but he had noticed lately how often you went shopping and by now his whole wardrobe along with your own was full of your clothes. 

It started with Bambam speaking to you calmly but it all just rubbed you the wrong way and you got defensive and by now you both were yelling in each others faces .”DO YOU EVEN KNOW THAT I HAVE TO HANG MY CLOTHES IN THE TOILET BECAUSE I HAVE NO SPACE IN MY WARDROBE BECAUSE OF YOU”.  In the beginning of this argument when Bambam began yelling at you it shocked you as it was very uncommon for him to yell at you, but now you wanted to fight back. 

“THEN WHY DONT YOU BUY YOURSELF ANOTHER WARDROBE!” at this point Bambam felt so angry he felt like he was gonna explode. You were really taking this too far. “You buy all this stuff out our shared account and were gonna go bank corrupt soon and we all know who contributes the majority of the money in the account and its clearly not you.” Bambam replies in an annoyed tone clearly stopping himself from yelling.

This crossed the line for you. Bambam knew how insecure you were about you job as a fashion designer as you were still a beginner so you weren’t really making a lot of money. Instead you were stuck being an assistant for another fashion designer who payed you very less. Despite how less your pay was you still always put it in your and Bambams shared account so it was fair for the both of you. This truly hurt you because there was no way you were expecting that from Bambam. 

You remained silent now just looking at the floor trying not to cry, It was getting too difficult as now your eyes were stinging and your throat was closing up because of how badly you wanted to cry. From the corner of your eye you could see Bambam watching you. You kept your gaze on the floor as you walked out the living room straight to your and Bambams bedroom and locked the door. You heard him say something but you were so blanked out that you didn’t even hear. As soon as you entered the room you let it all out. You laid there on the bed and cried. You had been told many times by fans and others that you were just a failure and fashion designers earnt  nothing and thats why you were with Bambam;because you were a gold digger and just wanted him for his money. 

This was always a part of your relationship that made you feel insecure. You didn’t like the fact that bambam had to pay for if not all, most the things you bought. Even your mum had told you to get a real job. So now was the time you got a real job. Your friends family owned a cafe and she always offered you a job there so you both could work together. You declined the offer kindly and decided to follow your dreams. But you were clearly not living in the real world if you thought you could just follow your dreams and become whatever you wanted. At this point you needed money. You didnt want to spend any of Bambams money from now on. Especially not after how he reacted. 

So you called your friend and it took less then two rings for her to pick up and answer in a cheerful tone “HELLO OMG WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN YOU HAVENT SPOKEN TO ME SINCE AGESSS” you chuckle at her excitement and answer back “F/N i just spoke to you yesterdayy” she let out an over exaggerated sigh and answered “Anyways why did u call its not like you to call me when your with your fancy boyfriend .”You roll your eyes at her even though she couldn’t see and laugh. 

“Umm, can I work at your cafe from tomorrow I know this is very short noticed but-” she cut you off with an excited squeal and she answered “OFCOURSE YOU CAN IM LITERALLY THERE RIGHT NOW AND ITS SO BORING” you smile at her answer. You were truly lucky to have her. ”Okay ill be there  tomorrow morning” you respond. You could hear a customer behind her and she answers back in a rush “Okay ill see you i gtg” and before you could even answer she cut the phone. 

You fell back on to the bed and let out a breath you hadn’t realised you had been holding. You would no longer spend Bambams money. You lay there in a bed for a while before you heard a timid knock on the door. So now was when he had decided to apologise. You ignored him before the knock turned a little louder. After ignoring it for a while you heard him twist the door handle and let out a sigh .”Can you open the door I just wanna have a shower.” You were dumbfounded. He really just wanted a shower? You went and opened the door not even looking at him for a second before laying back down on the bed and going on your phone. Bambam was just as stubborn as you and also didn’t spare you a glance as he headed to the wardrobe in front of you. You watched him from behind as he opened the wardrobe .A bag of your clothes that you had just bought recently fell out of the wardrobe and all your clothes in the bag fell on the floor. 

Bambam looked back at you as if to prove his point but you quickly closed your eyes not wanting him to think your paying any attention to him. He let out a groan and began picking up your clothes that had fell on the floor and put them back in the bag that you lazily hadn’t gotten rid of. He began looking through his clothes and took out a pair of grey shorts and a loose black shirt. You watched him as he took out his towel and shut the drawer. Even though you were really angry at him you couldn’t keep your eyes off of him. This time when he looked back at you , you didn’t look away. You looked at him as he looked back at you with a blank expression. He looked away quickly heading to the bathroom.

By the time Bambam got out it was beginning to get dark. You headed to the bathroom as soon as he got out and had a long warm shower. Usually you would wear one of his shirts or hoodies but today you didn’t want to. Instead you wore one of your own loose shirts and headed to the bed after turning off the lights. Even in the dark you could see that Bambam was already half asleep .You thought to yourself ‘am i petty enough to sleep on the sofa or make him sleep on the sofa?’ You decided to against it as you were not in the mood to get back pains especially when you had work tomorrow. You also decided that there was no point telling Bambam that you have work tomorrow. He would probably be glad that you would no longer have to spend his money anyways. (you were wrong)

You laid down on your side of the bed instantly wrapping yourself around the blankets and it felt so good after a long day of arguing with bambam. You were laying there in your own thoughts until you felt an arm wrap around your waist pulling you closer. Bambam always done this in his sleep and usually you found it adorable but not today. You took his arm and not so gently removed it from your waist moving further away from him. But all your effort went down the drain as he pulled you close again and mumbled something in his sleep. You decided there was no point moving him away any longer as it would result in you staying up all night. You got yourself comfortable in Bambams arms (even though you didn’t want to) and fell asleep in seconds. 

You woke up to the sound of your alarm going off extremely loudly and a grumpy looking bambam sitting crossed leg on the bed with his arms crossed staring at you. He had a pout on his face and he seriously looked like he was about to cry. For a second you nearly forgot about yesterday and were about to jump onto and cuddle him but then you stopped yourself. The alarm went of so you could get ready for work. You turned off the alarm and you could feel Bambams eyes on you. When you finally looked at the time you realised you didn’t have long left and that you should begin getting ready.

Bambam finally spoke as he saw you get up from the bed in a rush. “Where are you going.” You honestly didn’t want to reply but you didn’t want to have disturbed his sleep to not even tell him the reason why. ”I have to go to work.” he looked deep in thought for a second before he spoke again “But you have no work on Saturday”.You groaned and answered him “Well now I do and you should be glad because ill no longer spend your money and ill pay you back all of the money you’ve spent on me dont worry.” 

He had nothing to say. Bambam did not expect you to take everything so seriously. He didn’t want you to overwork yourself and there was no way you could pay him back for all the money he spent on you. It was simply too much. Bambam didn’t meet your eyes as you left for the bathroom. He waited for you to get out the bathroom and the second you walked out he cornered you against the wall with both his arms on either side of your head. 

“Your not going work. ”He says firmly looking at you in such an intense way that you had to look away. You adjusted your towel under his stare and spoke “I do. Now move out of the way i’m gonna get late.” He looked at you for long enough for you to finally look back at him. He looked angry and it was clear to you it was getting hard for him to remain calm. You moved around so you could get away from him but he wouldn’t budge. 

This whole thing was starting to annoy you. First he told you that you waste all his money and now that you wanted to make more money for yourself he wasn’t letting you do it. You couldn’t understand what was wrong with him. “OMG WHATS WRONG WITH YOU IM GONNA GET LATE TO WORK BECAUSE OF YOU , SO FUCKING ANNOYING UGH.” You screamed in his face whilst hitting his chest with your fists and he didn’t even flinch for a second. You hadn’t even realised that you were hitting his chest until he held both your wrists with his hands. 

Now he looked really pissed of. He tightened his jaw as he spoke “How dare you speak to me like that.” The confidence you had a second ago had now all disappeared. You looked away from his as he spoke , your wrists still in his hold. When he saw that you weren’t gonna answer him, his hold on your wrists tightened and you let out a whimper. It was clear that you had pissed Bambam off too much. There was no way he was going to let you get away with this. 

“Take off your towel and get here” he says while he lets go of your wrists and moves to sit on the edge of the bed. You didn’t want to annoy him even more by not doing as he said so you began to strip yourself of your towel as he watched your every move. You tried to hurry as you quickly took of your panties after your towel and walked towards him feeling very exposed. 

He motioned for you to lay across his lap so your ass would be right in front of him on his lap. Now you knew exactly what was about to happen. ”Good” You hear Bambam say as he rubbed his hands all over your ass occasionally squeezing your skin. You were laying there your eyes getting droopy until you felt a harsh slap on your ass that made you jolt awake. You let out a whine as Bambam messages the spot he just hit .You could still feel the sting of the previous slap until he slapped the same spot again .He began messaging the spot again and by now you had tears in your eyes. He gave your ass a last strong slap before he told you to get off his lap. The last hit was so bad that tears began to fall from your eyes and you let out a groan. 

When you stood up the pain on your ass magnified and you winced at the feeling. Bambam also stood up after you and you felt so small in front of him. He towered over you as he spoke “Get on all fours on the bed.” You done what he said immediately getting on your hands and knees on the bed. You waited for him to do something as you couldn’t see him. You heard some shuffling and by the time you saw Bambam he was only wearing his boxers and getting onto the bed. 

You could see his bulge through his black boxers and you wondered to yourself how long hes been hard for. You faced forward as he was on his knees right behind you. You felt his hand wonder around your ass and you winced at how sensitive your ass had become. His hand wondered up all the way up your spine to your neck. He pushed your neck down and you took that as a sign to move your head to the bed and then his hand reached to the centre of your back. You understood what he meant and you arched your back. 

After you were in position Bambam moved his finger down to your pussy moving your wetness around. He had no idea that this whole situation would arouse you so much. He moved his head in between your legs from behind you instantly licking the lips of your pussy. You tried your best not to make a sound as his tongue didn’t go in but licked the outside of your pussy. He used two of his fingers to open your lips and he began drinking up all your wetness. He was moving his tongue so fast and his fingers were also circling around your clit. You felt like you were gonna pass out. 

For what felt like an eternity ,Bambam continued to eat you out and by now your legs were giving out and you felt like you were about to cum. You let out a particularly loud moan as his tongue circled around your entrance and you moved your hips back onto his face out of desperation to reach your orgasm. He held your hips firmly now stopping all movements of your hips and continued .As your orgasm approached your body began slightly shaking and Bambam knew you were about to cum. He moved his face away suddenly and you let out a whine now feeling extremely needy. 

“Did you really think it was that easy?” He says with a small chuckle and you let out a groan in response. It was clear that he had pulled down his boxers as now you could feel the tip of his cock circling around your pussy. You could come just from the feeling of that. You could feel how hard bambam was and you had no idea how he could remain so composed even though he was rock hard. You wanted him to fuck you so bad , you moved your hips back and let out a needy wine. You heard Bambam mutter “What a slut” as he moved the tip of his dick to your entrance. He pushed it in all the way in one go and you let out the loudest moan you had let out that night. 

You felt intoxicated as bambam held onto your hips tightly as he thrusted into you hard and fast. You could feel his anger and hurt through the way he was moving. Bambam pulled your hair making your back arch even more as he fucked into you. You could hear his grunts and it was all getting too much for you. Your legs couldn’t keep you up any longer as you were about to cum. 

Bambam could see that your legs were about to give out so he held you up his grip tightening around your hips as he moved his hips even faster.” Aagh im gonna cum” you say in between breaths and it was getting too hard for you to speak. You heard him hum as he sped up pushing your head into the bed as he continued to fuck you. 

With another harsh thrust you could feel Bambam reaching deep inside of you and you let out a whine as he hit your special spot. He noticed this and continue to thrust into the same spot until you screamed out his name as you came. Bambam was really close to and he slowed down a little in case you felt very sensitive.When he couldnt control himself any more he took hold of your hands putting them behind your back as he held your wrists. He fucked you even harder letting out all his built up anger and with a grunt you could feel Bambam filling you up. 

He pulled out as you collapsed onto the bed completely breathless and you both were covered in sweat .He laid down beside you not looking at you. You remained silent until he spoke “You don’t need to over work yourself. Theres no shortage of money.” You didn’t say anything as sleep was begining to take over you.You didnt know what bambam said after that as you fell into deep sleep not even caring about the argument anymore. 

Bambam looked to see if you were still awake as he wanted to apologise but he smiled when he saw you now completely asleep. He felt guilty for saying the stuff that he did but he seriously no longer had any space of his own. He moved a piece of hair that had fallen on your face and noticed how exhausted you looked. He placed a gentle kiss on you lips and got up to get a towel. 

He returned to your sleeping figure on the bed and tried to clean you as gently as possible. You were so deep in your slumber that you didn’t even move an inch as Bambam pulled your legs apart in order to clean you properly and to remove his cum from your body. After he had cleaned you up he heard the sound of your phone ringing and decided to check who it is. It was F/N. Bambam picked up the phone to hear immediately “ OMG Y/N WHERE ARE YOUU I TOLD MY MUM YOU WERE COMING TO HELP TODAYYY , SHE WAS SO EXCITED SHE EVEN-” Bambam cut her off by answering. He had realised that you were about to start working at your friends cafe.”Uh hi its bambam , Y/N’s asleep right now and she wont be coming today ill let her know you called.” Bambam was hoping your friend wouldn’t get upset that you weren’t coming. After a second F/N replied “Ah um okay let her know I called” and after that she immediately cut the phone. 

Bambam laid down next to you and let out a sigh whilst wrapping his arms around you. He smiled as he pulled you closer and mumbled “stupid” with a chuckle .”I love you” he said before he also fell asleep.

MASTERLIST

[milkiijustwrites]

Anon asked:Ok so.. Can I request prompt no. 46 from the Hurt/Comfort prompts with Kokichi and Shuichi "separately if you can do both". Please take your time and drink water and milk. Have a nice day, Kiibs! 💜

Notes:

This is the kokichi one for one of the request by the same anon! Hope you like it!

For anyone who wants to request me on a sentence prompt, this is the post

#oneshots

Warning:

Slight depressing

Hurt

Couple relationship

They/them reader

#C.46 "Hey...hey.. it's just me"

Kokichi ouma

"rustle rustle....."

There's a rustling noise that echoed through the entire room. You stood at where you were , looking at the window in front of you.You thought to yourself, is this really a good idea?

Suddenly, a figure appeared on the window, you quickly ran towards it and open up the window immediately, letting the figure in.

It was a purple haired boy, wearing a checkered scarf, it was easy to recognise him with that scarf he's wearing.

Kokichi ouma, the partner of your life.

"Phew!! I actually made it up!! Praise me Y/N!!! "

Kokichi stated enthusiastically, holding both of your hands while swaying them in the air, asking for your praise.

"you actually made it which surprised me but.... Is this really a good idea?"

You couldn't help but doubt about the choice you made. It seems that kokichi denied that thought as he shook his head and comforted you by saying that it's gonna be alright!

"don't worry y/N! Plus, if we didnt made this decision, when will we ever meet in person? "

Stated kokichi, while lifting his shoulders，showing a helpless look.

That's right... You guys can't help but to meet in person in this kind of way, since your parents doesn't allow you to have any association with him. The reason? Well , for some reason, they hated him. Maybe it's because of his attitude towards people . But, they don't even understand him, that's what makes you mad.

" yeah, let's do this"

You stated, you already prepared to get scholded by them after this, but who cares at this point? You just wanted a peaceful date with your beloved with no parents watching and staring.

You both jumped off of the window and immediately got welcomed by a big sheet, held by the d.i.c.e members. So when you both fall down, the sheet will help you both prevent from hurting yourselves.

It was fun , you bounced on the sheet along with kokichi's laugh.

You all quickly escalated to a big truck and leave the house immediately. It was frightening and exciting experience for you, you immediately started laughing out loud.

"now that's thrilling!!"

You stated out loudly, along with a few laughs as well.

Kokichi couldn't help but let out a grin as well while he saw you having fun.

You both went to the dating spot with a peaceful ride. You were having fun playing cards ,singing, playing games with them, you thought this day will continue like this, peacefully, but you're obviously wrong.

Do you really think you could escape by your parents evil clutches?

It seems that when they realise you were gone, they immediately went out and check , unfortunately, one of the d.i.c.e members were caught by them and were being threatened by them，forcing him to tell the location of you and kokichi.

And now they're right behind the truck, driving their car, honking vigorously , implying the truck to stop.

" Ah Shi- here we go... Don't worry we'll drive as fast as we can to get rid of them."

Said kokichi while checking out the car behind them, letting out a pissed off look on his face.

The truck started to get faster, as your heart beats faster as well, you couldn't even enjoy the cold breeze at that state, it's making you having second thoughts, though it's already been too late.

Should you stop the truck and go back to them like a good guy? But what if you don't? Will they call the police in kokichi?

You thought awhile, and finally , you let out a soft voice.

"... Stop .. stop the car"

Sure enough, you can only choose to be an obedient child towards your parents. With all dissatisfaction ， you decided to hid them in yourself.

Kokichi looked at you, he wanted to help you, but he couldn't, your family just don't welcome him at all. So he kept silence , while the truck slows down...

It was a hurtful scenery, while kokichi and you had to leave each other, while the d.i.c.e members being sad , while you listened to your parents nagging.Holding back the tears, you took the car all the way back home .

When you went back home, you immediately shut yourself in your room, let alone your parents nagging about you and kokichi, you sat in front of the door , weeping, by yourself . You could Vaguely hear those nasty words your parents said about kokichi.

" such a disgusting being, how could they think of such ideas? "

" we shouldn't let them have any association ever!"

" we shouldn't let our child learn nasty things from that ... "

" I heard he lies a lot, how bad...."

"I'm sure his parents were definitely disappointed"

"Shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up shut up"

You mumbled, trying to cover your ears, not wanting to hear anything they're saying.

You finally let down tears, throwing all the dissatisfaction out from your heart, tears rolling down your cheeks, dropping to the ground, the tears could not stop dripping , you wiped and wiped but theyre still dripping.

You just wanted to have a normal relationship with kokichi, with the person you love, why is it so hard?

Suddenly, you heard footsteps drawing closer to you, you couldn't see anything fur to your wet eyes, but you certainly thought that it was your parents.

" go away! I don't want to see you guys at all!"

You screamed, while your voice still stays a bit of hoarse. It hurts your throat when you did that, but that isn't comparable on what you've been through just now.

"hey... Hey... It's just me"

You heard a familiar voice in the room, you quickly wiped off your tears, looking around, only to find kokichi standing in front of the window, smiling.

You ran toward him and hugged him tightly , tears immediately began falling down again. He hugged back you too and shuffled his hand into your hair , comforting you.

"there there... You don't have to worry y/N, no matter where are you, I'll always find you, Okay?"

With a rare tenderly tone , he stated, he then kissed your forehead and tuck you to bed.

Maybe it's because you cried too much, you immediately fell asleep, not knowing kokichi had been accompanied you for a long time.

He left when he heard your parents' footsteps and said goodbye to you as well.

"good night Y/N, sweet dreams "

....

Okay I tried T-T hope you like it!!

[the-blackdale]

QoAaD in-betweens

Kit and Ty in the shadowmarket

Headcanons

Long post warning ⚠ ( I got carried away 😅)

✰ what could've happened in one of Kit and Ty's visits to the shadow market ✰

It was just past midnight, they have been wandering the market for nearly an hour with no luck. no one was ready to sell them necromantic supplies because quote we dont do buisness with shadowhunters unquote. Kit should be happy that this necromancy plan was failing, but the problem was ,that it made Ty sad, which intern made Kit sad. He has to do something about this .

They were in the dark magic sector of the market, Ty was beside him with his headphones on and checking the list of ingredients they needed. Thats when he saw Big Ben's shop. Big Ben was a werewolf who often bullied young vampires and mundanes in the market. A plan started forming itself in the back of his mind.

He turned to Ty, and told him his plan. Ty was quite confused,"why would we shoplift when we can buy it ?" "Because its fun Ty !! And he used to bully me when I was young,this is payback." "But.." "Ty pleasseeee....."

After some pleading, Ty agreed. no one could resist Kit when he uses his special puppy-eyes. The plan was simple.

Ty went to Big ben's shop and started looking around like a curious customer, He pointed to something in the back of the shop and that was Kit's cue. As soon as Ben turned around, Kit made his way to shop and extended his hand to grab the small vial labelled as 'incense from the heart of the volcano'.

He was about to put the vial in his jeans pocket, when he felt someone knock into him from behind. Damn the crowd today. He lost his balance and grabbed at the fairy lights which were dangling in the front of the shop. He could see Ty reach out towards him, but he was too late. Before Kit could realise he crashed into the table where all the fancy glass orbs were kept, and heard them all crash in a deafening tone to the ground.

Big Ben turned at the noise and saw the vial in Kit's hand.He started to move towards Kit, screaming things like "bloody thiefs". Ty who was at first shocked by the noise recovered quickly and knocked over a plotted plant off the counter which, thankfully, landed on Big Ben's feets.

They exchanged a panicked look and started running like no tomorrow, Kit in the front pushing people apart to make way for them. He saw other customers and shop owners look curiously at them, but it was a normal thing at the shadow market. He could her Big Ben screaming at them from behind, he was limping a bit, and occasionally jumping up and down clutching his injured leg with both his hands, it made his look like a kangaroo, and Kit couldn't help but burst out laughing at the thought.

They were still running when they reached the fairy section of the market, it was quite crowded and they have lost Being Ben somewhere in the way. Kit glanced behind him to check on Ty, his hood was up and his headphones were on his ears. His hair was all disheveled from the running and his face was flushed, he also had a smile on his face which caught Kit's breath away. That smile was missing after livvy's death, it was like there was no sunrise in Kit's life.

Kit was too distracted by Ty's smile,cause next he knew, he was knocking into someone who was holding a huge painting in front of their face. Quite clumsy for a shadowhunter. He stumbled backwards and crashed into Ty, who intern lost his balance and they both fell into a table which held many different kinds of candies and fairy fruits.

He could hear the screams of many fairies, which to be honest, were really shrill. The bowls were made from fairy wood, so thank god they didnt broke, but the candies were scattered everywhere.

He landed with his ankle above Ty's foot, and he had somehow managed to grab onto Ty's left sleeve when he was falling, which was a bad decision both because Ty doesnt like being startled, and Kit took Ty down with him when he was falling. He quickly left Ty's sleeve and looked up at the fairy who was selling those candies, they were shouting something is a language, which Kit was glad he didnt understood.

Ty was the first to recover, He stood up and extended a hand to Kit. Kit gladly latched onto Ty's hand and let himself be pulled up. The fairy was still shouting at them and making weird hand gestures at all the mess that was made of their candies. Kit glanced at his and Ty's linked hands . Ty's hands were soft and warm, they fit perfectly with Kit's.

Ty pulled lightly at Kit's hand to get his attention. wow, he really had zoned out in the middle of a mess thinking about his and Ty's joined hands. When Kit looked up at Ty, he had a mischievous grin on his face, Kit couldn't help but smile, he understood what Ty was trying to say.

they started running again, this time with Ty in the front and their hands still clasped together. Ok, he needs to stop thinking about his hand in Ty's, it was distracting ! They passed various stall with fairies in them, but no one payed them any attention.

Ty rounded a corner pulling Kit with him as they entered a small alley which was separated from the market by a beaded curtain. The noises from the market were muffled here, so Ty removed his headphones. Kit ignored the way his heart crumpled when Ty pulled his hand away from Kit's.

Ty bend over and put both his hands on his knees, he was breathing heavily but also laughing, this was the most fun he has ever had !! Kit was leaning against a wall, also breathing heavily but still with a smile on his face. They looked at each other for a moment and doubled over with a new wave of laughter.

when they could finally breathe, Kit took the vial of incense from his jeans pocket and threw it towards Ty, who expertly caught it and added it to their shopping bag with the other ingredients.

He was about to suggest that they walk to the main street where their Uber would pick them up, when Ty said," I got something for you".He reached into his hoodie pocket and took out a handful of candies. Rose flavoured. "I picked them when we crashed into the candy table" at that he looked down and Kit would've said that he was blushing if his cheeks werent already flush from all the running " I noticed you have a sweet tooth and thought that you would like these."

Kit couldn't help but smile, his heart was full of happiness and something else he couldn't pin point. The mere fact that Ty noticed was enought to turn him into a blushing teenage girl with a crush.

Ty was there, slowly breaking down everything he used to believe about his life and replacing it with something as beautifull and pleasant as a dream. Yet so real. It was like Ty set free a bunch of fireflies in his dark world and everything was suddenly glamorous and worth fighting for.

in this moment, in a deserted back alley with dull lights and muffled noises of a crowd, Kit fell a bit more in love with Ty, and Ty fell a bit more in love with Kit.

Tagging some moots,hope yall dont mind: @ghafa-dale @niathesanctuary-bolastair-kanej @autumnangel20 @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @eutonyinwhisper @queenlilith43 @pink-party-dino @clarys-heosphoros @neo-lightchild-decafineator @will-herondale-my-beloved @dark-artifices-only @gabtapia