#still think it doesnt end with enough character development

[happiighost]

DQ 8 is complete!

I do still have the post-game with draconian trials but I might leave for another time. I managed to get through it in 37 hours around level 70ish. This first game I got through on my hacked 3ds. So I was able to plop the DLC items in the game and circumvent some grinding. I also added the patch for orchestra tracks.

This technically is the 2nd time I've played this game. only getting as far as the first boss on my friend's PS2 that broke. This one of the dragon quests games I've seen most hyped about but I came away slightly disappointed. The main four are funny but there is little interaction between them. It seems after their arc is completed, they have little to do with the plot, coming along for the ride. Jessica is the one I feel suffers from this the most. SHE ended up being my least favorite overall due to me not getting much from her plotline. The extra added party members (red and Morrie) also suffer from this. However, they are add-ons to the original game so I'm more willing to forgive it. There is one exception to this, yangus! He is one of the best things about this game and I love his interactions with trode.

I must spoiled by the team dynamic in DQ 11, I'm attached to the entire cast of that game. I expected the same for the small cast DQ8 but got disappointed instead. The individual arcs and vignettes are very enjoyable but I just wish the connective thread was stronger.

[velvetjune]

incredible to think that Alan Wake 2’s existence itself implies that maybe it’ll be about Alan finally leaving the dark place, directly solving the cliffhanger of Alan Wake 1, but instead now Saga, Casey, Rose, Tim, Alice, and (still) Alan are in the Dark Place. Genius subversion of expectations

[prongsfish]

healing from your first long term relationship that u thought would last forever is weird bc its been so long and i dont miss you and i dont even feel sad about it anymore but my heart is still your shape and im terrified to try let it change. learning to live on my own again is awesome though

[beescake]

i am in love with your sollux i think

sollux love party :]

if you’re interested heres some of my personal fondness thoughts on him.. big warning for the mega long read ahead aye

as we alr know sollux's rejection of participation somewhat mirrors dave's rejection of heroism, but even without getting cooked to completion i still find sollux's character v compelling beyond the fourth wall

as someone who doesnt get a pinch of that Protagonist Sparkle to begin with, he can openly say he wants to leave anytime…. and unlike dave, he actually Can leave the scene anytime. but he can never be truly Free from the story via permanent character death like the other trolls.

his irrelevancy is indeed relevant - he’s there so u can point him out.

while his image is intended to be a relic of past internet subculture, his role is not only about hehehaha being a Chad or a 2000s cyberforum 2²chan haxxor ragequit gamebro.

his continued existence also happens to add a Bit to the overarching themes of homestuck! a Bit that gives him longer-lasting thematic relevance compared to the trolls who could’ve had more character potential but didnt get to survive beyond the main story.

the Bit in question:

his defiance contributes to the illusion of agency (treating characters = people with autonomy). he’s “aware” of it, and that recognition is worth noting enough to forcibly keep him alive as both reward and punishment.

considering how his personality & classpect is designed its definitely a very haha thing for hussie to do LOL. he’s made to be op asf so he's resigned to doing dirty work, gradually deteriorating along the way but never truly dying. as fans have mentioned before, him openly rejecting involvement after a while of grim tolerance is like if the sim u were controlling suddenly stopped, looked up and gave u the finger while u were step six into the walkthrough for Every Possible Sim Death Animation.

but since he’s just a sim… the more he hates it, the more you keep him around. if ur sim started complaining abt your whimsical household storyline you’d definitely keep that little fuck.

but yeah i like that sollux is just idling. the significance of his presence being that one dude who's always reliably Somewhere, root core Unchanged, no individual ambitions (possibly due to fear of consequence?), and design-wise: a staple representative product of his time.

compared to dirk's character, who has aged phenomenally well into the present (themes of control + AR + artificial intelligence, clearer exploration around navigating relationships/sexuality, infinite possibilities of self-splinterhood and trait inheritance), sollux's potential is really... contained. bitter. defeatist. limiting and frustrating in the way old tech is.

the world continues moving on to shinier, brighter, more advanced automated things - minimalist and metaverse or whatever but sollux is still here 🧍‍♂️ going woohoo redblue 3d. (tho personally i imagine his vibe similar to what the kids call cassette futurism on pinterest mixed w more grimy grunge insectoid influences eheh)

conceptually-speaking,

at the foundation of it all, the rapid pace of modern development was built off the understanding of ppl like sollux in the past, who were There actively at work while the dough was still beginning to rise

thats one of the cool things abt the idea of trolls preceding humans! the idea that trolls like sollux excelled back when lots of basic shit still needed to be discovered, building structures like networks and codes from scratch, and humans will eventually inherit and reinvent that knowledge in ways that become so optimized it makes the old manual effort seem archaic, slow, and labour-intensive.

but despite information/resources/shortcuts being more accessible now, much of the new highly-anticipated stuff released on trend still end up unfinished, inefficient, or expiring quickly due to cutting corners under severe capitalistic pressures

meanwhile, some of the old stuff frm past generations of thorough, exploratory and perfectionistic development still remains working, complete, and ever so sturdy.

those things continue to exist, just outside our periphery with either:

zero purpose left for modern needs (outdated/obsolete)

or

far too important to replace or destroy, bcs of its surprisingly essential and circumstantial usefulness in one niche specific area.

which are honestly? both points that sum up sollux pree well.

dramatic ending sorry. anw are u still on the fence or are u Sick abt him like me </3

[citricconnor]

Hi! Decided to post some nega!au designs i did:

First off, nega!Gyro's and nega!Fenton's designs, i drew them first because they're my favorite characters, so they're the ones i have most figured out about yet.

Also i don't have much to say about them for now, what's important is kind of already on the pics, nega!Gyro is still a scientist and nega!Fenton is still an intern and hero villain!

Here's nega!Gandra! I really liked drawing her and even tho i'm not too sure about how i characterized her i still liked the result.

I'd say that she's working a corporate job at Waddle or something, and even though she doesnt hate it she still wishes she was doing something more important. I'm thinking of giving her a villain arc...

Then here's nega!Webby and nega!Lena ! Designing Lena was hard but i ended up really liking the result.

Weblena just kind of switched vibes with each other, nega!Lena is dorky and very naive, and nega!Webby is more like an angsty teen that's kind of annoying, i still don't know if her hyperfixation on the McDuck family stays in this au or not.

I don't have a story yet and i still want to develop these designs more, especially Webby, i feel like she's not edgy enough.

[cutekittenlady]

I wanna see more fan theories about Alucards unexpected return at the end of Nocturne. And not just his return but also how you think each of the characters will react/get along with him.

Like there's Richter who is arguably probably the most acquianted with who Alucard is given he's seemingly the first one to recognize him and is the one to describe him as a 'legend'. But, like, whose legend exactly? A belmont legend? Or a european legend in general? Either way I think Richter might just be the quickest to trust Alucard. Partially because hes an ancestral ally but also because Alucard pretty directly saved his life.

But then theres everyone else.

Do Maria and Mizrak know who Alucard is? Or who Dracula was? If they recognize the latter but not the former will that effect how they see Alucard?

Annette definitely doesnt know who alucard is or what his story is, so I think she's the one I can most easily see raising the question of why they should trust and ally with this random vampire (dhampyr but I dunno if they'd identify that on sight). Thus giving a good reason for someone, either Richter or even Alucard himself, to give some exposition on the subject. Even after that though she may retain some standoffish caution around Alucard until his actiosn compound enough that shes able to trust him.

Mizrak, I think, may know who Dracula was and MAY even know some of the details of his destruction given he works for the church and the church is more likely to have kept records of the whole thing. Though if he DOES know its possible he's only gotten some very biased and/or inaccurate accounts given that I don't think Sypha or Trevor would have left their own account of events to the church. Oddly enough I can see Mizrak willingly working with Alucard. After all he had his whole relationship with Olrox (tho it didn't end well) and while he clings to his faith strongly enough that he put up with the actions of the abbot, he seems to have a pragmatic side that might reason that even if Alucard is a vampire working for his own reasons, he's a powerful ally they desperately need. Plus he may be able to reason that keeping someone like Alucard where they can see him is a good move.

Maria is interesting because her mother was a speaker and she's been growing up alongside Richter for years. It's possible Richter told her about what his ancestors got up to, and maybe even about Alucard. Maybe he just thought they were aspirational stories his mother told him as a kid. Then again, its still possible she doesnt entirely know the full story of who Alucard is as a person. Plus after everything she just went through with the vampires and her father's betrayal, she may not be emotionally in a place to trust Alucard right off the bat. Of course, discussing how Maria reacts to Alucard is especially interesting considering game canon. Or rather the vagueness of game canon. I mean, Alucard and Maria are a popular pairing in the Castlevania fandom and not for no reason, but canon itself opts to be vague about the nature of their relationship. I mean, theres no mentions of them getting married, etc. So whether they were romantic, one sided on Marias side, or purely platonic is one of those things thats really kind of an a la carte for fans.

With all that being said, Maria is bound to become close to Alucard in some way assuming the creators of Castlevania Nocturne intend to stay close to canon on this front. But for long time video game fans this is easily one of the most looked forward to developments come season 2.

[variksel]

taking a DEEP BREATH yeah but have you considered that taylor broke the cycle in the exact way than his friends did, through love, and his character development might have been more subtle yeah but it was still extremely there and taylors ending was SUCH a good addition to the message at the core of season 2 because it says "hey your parents fucked up and YOU DONT HAVE TO FORGIVE THEM"

taylors character development was realizing that his dad FUCKED UP massively. and maybe he had justified reasons for it, even. just like the other dads, he had reasons for why he did what he did. but that doesnt erase the fact that it was fucked up, and that nicky hurt taylor, and that the damage is irreversible. and taylor doesnt have to forgive that, he doesnt have to put up with it.

i think its so good and important that linc and norm for example forgave their dads and love them at the end of all of s2. they chose their fucked up dads and they broke the cycle of fucking up, but its equally as important that taylor did that too by choosing to NOT forgive his dad. and at the end of the day he broke it by choosing love, by seeing who his dad really is and choosing to love his mom who was always there for him instead of the deadbeat with good intentions

"this is as good as it gets." and for taylor, that wasnt good enough

[megolololo]

why shockwave is the most fatherly decepticon (even more so than soundwave):

(aka i’m delusional and smitten)

every character in every medium revolves around a theme. a theme in a novel or a show or a film tends to be an idea that will be explored in both the subtext and text of that medium.

shockwave’s theme, surprise, surprise, is creation and rebirth (in most tf media). his whole character is concerned with the parenting of either himself (as a way of rehabilitating after empurata) or of others (predacons, his little bots in cyberverse, or even his subordinates like tarn)

now, you might ask, what sets shockwave’s fatherliness apart from soundwave’s? how is he any more fatherly than soundwave?

allow me to demonstrate with the following screenshot from guardians of the galaxy:

yup.

shockwave was everyone’s father, but soundwave was everyone’s daddy (no not like that)

still not convinced? allow me to introduce you or remind you of the concept of nature vs. nurture. ironically enough, for someone who is only a father, shockwave is the more nurturing one. soundwave is considered a father because he is a cassette player and his “children” are cassettes

in idw1 soundwave was actually more so adopted by his cassettes rather than the other way around. shockwave, on the other hand, birthed - even if not literally - and raised all the subjects he needed to raise to prepare for either war or for life

in idw1, shockwave was like a father to tarn. post-empurata, he still chose to call tarn the name that defined him the most: “damus.” not “glitch”, not “tarn”, which are all personas and not real identities (glitch = associated with his outlier power, tarn = leader of djd) but ���damus.” shockwave knows the real tarn because he was there to raise him.

(extra note: to really drill in the fact that shockwave was fatherly to tarn, shockwave thinks “damus” is tarn’s real name while megatron, right before killing him, implies that “glitch” is. megatron is a military leader; he will favor the identity that holds the most militant potential. shockwave cared for tarn; he will favor the boy he knew when he was still in the academy)

we can even still see the effects of pre-empurata shockwave on tarn, who takes great pleasure in the arts and everything conceptually and fundamentally beautiful like poetry or literature or music. and guess who wanted to be remembered for “both his brains and his beauty”?

in cyberverse, he was actually kinda like a father to shadowstriker. he took her in after she was severely injured and placed her in his unit as a form as rehab, if you will (she wouldn’t have been able to go to more militant and armed units in such a condition). though he was less there to nurture shadowstriker, as she was already a developed adult, he was there to protect her. iirc, in a scene where they get frozen by this immobilizer, shockwave pushes her behind him.

it’s the same in tfp, where shockwave, near the end of the series, shoves ratchet behind him during the spacebridge battle and fires at other autobots. the enemy is LITERALLY next to him and yet he chooses to protect ratchet from stray bullets. and to address the predacon elephant in the room, he literally raised predacons. he petted them and comforted them and gave them sustenance to live and thrive.

shockwave is cold, rational, and is obsessed with logic, yes, but he assumes this logic from what he has observed and what he has experienced before, whether that before be pre-empurata or before the war.

could he have had a fatherly and caring figure before the war? possibly. could he have picked it up from how animals assume this role automatically, as if it was biologically and universally a logical thing to do? possibly. but have we ever considered that… it’s just part of his personality?

BuT but shoCkwAve dOesnT have EmoTions

if he didn’t have emotions and therefore no personality, he’d never feel compelled to lie or have any will to do anything. he is driven. a computer is not. a computer is told to do something and will output the most logical output based on its coding. he’s self-driven and autonomous with his decisions.

so, to sum it up, shockwave is nurturing, but because he is often overruled by the need to follow a strict diet of reason and self-motivated curiosity for knowledge, this part of him is always overshadowed. he’s not a good man. he will frankly never be. but he can be a good father if he only let himself be. thank you for coming to my ted talk

[margueritedaisies]

I just love drawing families of fictional characters, its interesting to think of how each sibling would look. I try to make them different from one another but at the same time maintain familial similarities.

Jinzha resembles their mom, Muzha their dad, and Nezha's a good mix of both.

Also get ready with some sibling dynamic rant, mostly relation HCs by me.

Enough with the parent child dynamic

I want sibling dynamic. Where these three come to terms on what happened between them. Specifically Muzha and Nezha's interaction is the one I want to see.

Tbh those two's fates in the myth reminded me of Hyakkimaru and Tahomaru in Dororo.

Like Nezha and Muzha had so much potential to gain solidarity with each other. Because Jinzha could never relate to them as the ignored or unwanted child. Muzha has that middle child stuggle fr.

Muzha is the one so eager to gain their fathers favor trying to meet Jinzha's level . Nezha wants nothing from his father so he makes himself worse.

Muzha's frustration with Nezha is that Nezha is rebellious, disrespectful of their dad

While Nezha's frustration to Muzha is that Muzha is so blinded and always struggling to achieve something so futile. Deep down he hates how Muzha is suffering this way but he wouldnt speak of it. This is why they always at odds.

They should make a movie focusin the Li brothers fr

Other than overusing the actual myths.

Fuck the ending from the original myth, they didnt even consider how the children felt from all the abuse. Not even mention of Muzha's death.

Enough Ao Bing, what about Muzha???

And the moral lesson is just about "respecting elders"?? The story still had so much to wrap up. How can you call this a family if there is some sort of hierarchal system. A family requires empathy to maintain that connection.

Tbh its kinda realistic

Families and siblings can still inflict trauma from each other .And a story based on reconcilation is a good way for this to be about family counselling.

I wanna see the "what ifs". It could be each brothers own story of self healing from the trauma caused on each other.

Maybe Im getting my hopes up too much, but it could be a development for them to forgive, start anew and an opportunity to connect and catch up on what they missed on each other.

Edit:

As for Jinzha he also has his own struggles as the eldest. Keeping up the station as the golden favored and perfect son. But its Asian family dynamics, which means hes in a lot of pressure. But he is mentally and emotionally strong. The brothers always busy on his studies ,future responsibilities and training to be able to spend time together. Their timetables seemed to be planned out to always not meet. Jinzha especially had less freetime. And if he ever came across any of his brothers, it was only one of them never both.

He doesnt mind being a buffer for the other two feuding but it does stress him out that it will never change. But he'll make sure to give time and attention to both of them as much as he can.

Other than keeping up his fathers expectations he also doesnt want to fail as a big brother to them🥺😭

Muzha and Nezha can see his efforts so they do not dare hold anything against him. Muzha still keeps his competitive attitude when Jinzha's around but accepts any offered kindness from Jinzha. While Nezha enjoys his company when he gets the chance.

Also because I tend to hold on to this little bit of bonding😭🥺🥺Jinzha trying to be the best big bro

Thinking of the contrast in the future where Jinzha was tasked to torture Nezha destroyed me😭😭😭What did Jinzha even feel while he had to do it??

Also here some Nezha with his hair down again

[paintbrushnebula]

I think now that Tangled the Series has been over for the better part of four years now, what makes me sad the most is that there were enough pieces left behind by the film to construct a compelling narrative for a strong continuation of Rapunzel and Eugene's story that wouldn't have required all this "bigger and more epic" stuff that the series made up in order to be interesting. 

And you can have big epic magical stuff, that's fine! I LOVE epic large-scale stories! But there's a difference between expanding your world by further developing its elements and themes, and just scaling up the adventure tenfold to be “bigger and better”—which is what I feel that the series did in the end. 

It’s funny, because I was already a fan of Tangled when I was little. I still remember being 7 years old sitting in that theater with my sister, actually breathless and in shock when Eugene drew his last breath. I had never seen a kids movie where a lead character dies.

(and I know that sounds absurd because there were Disney films before where a lead character dies and comes back XD look I was 7 and my parents weren’t people who knew many pop culture American movies at the time so I didn’t watch much that wasn’t Disney Channel or VHS films that my Grandma owned. To this day I’m still kind of trying to catch up on film culture XD)

Sorry to get off track but what I’m trying to say is, I was there when the series was announced and they revealed that promo art back in 2016, I saw the 30 second promo trailer, I watched “Wind in my Hair” when it was released on Youtube in February 2017 the morning before school and I was hyped for the rest of the day, and I remember watching Before Ever After’s premiere with my sister and was FLOORED that it was good??!! Like actually was gonna have a serialized overarching story and everything! God I’ll never forget Eugene’s verse where he pulls out that ring. I’ll never forget Rapunzel’s face when he gives her his proposal speech (before it went downhill that is), and I’ll always forget the last 25 minutes that take place  after Rapunzel’s hair grows back because its low-key pretty heckin boring! 

What hyped me was the relationship stuff, Rapunzel’s PTSD, the parent drama, everything that those first 30 minutes had that made me THINK we were in for an emotional story about Rapunzel’s life after the tower, I thought we’d get to see in detail how she’s gonna to grapple with her trauma, her new life, her new responsibilities, her new relationships, all that. And some of the series was that, a very small “some.” Not enough by any means for me lol

Because like, wouldn’t that have been a more interesting story to tell than the one we got? Ultimately Rapunzel’s Tangled Adventure doesn’t feel like a continuation of Rapunzel’s story, it’s more like a Brand New Adventure that happens star Rapunzel and Eugene Fitzherbert. I know that sounds weird and I might not be making much sense here but, did the story of a girl who stops a plague of darkness and fights a transdimensional demon blueberry ghost girl and has to reconcile with her “step-sister” HAVE to be about Rapunzel? Also like, just. NOTICE how that summation of the story of the series DOESNT involve Eugene in some way. You know. The hecking CO-LEAD of the film this series is based on. 

And like, there was so much story to be told with Rapunzel and Eugene WITHOUT the blueberry Disney Junior-giving ghost girl, the poorly written heavily contrived step-sister conflict, AND the big plague of darkness nonsense. Rapunzel and Eugene are two VERY tragic individuals. DO SOMETHING WITH THEM, IOUHWO4Y2IBBU3FN3FI

I’ll admit that I was more attached to the series than I was to the movie while it was airing, and even for like 2 years after it was over. I was younger and more immature and the big stakes and fresh new characters and magical adventures captivated me more than the focused drama of the movie. But now that I’m older, I realize that I resonate more with Rapunzel in the movie. NOT in any concerning “do you need help?” Kind of ways, just that I find myself thinking the way she thought, since I’m now around the age she was in the movie. The way I think about my future, my self esteem etc. I relate to how she feels inexperienced and fresh in the world despite being a young adult, because she hasn’t done any of those “big things” yet. And you wonder “how am I gonna do those big things? When do they happen? Will I know what to do when they happen?” I get it, Rapunzel, I really do. 

The series is kinda an afterthought to me now I guess. I still appreciate that it exists and I’m so happy it happened. In the beginning, it didn’t feel real when it was happening. Like a dream honestly. And like, Tangled the Series is literally 80% the reason I wanted to write fiction, so I’ll always be grateful for it. 

But holy kriff is the movie so much better heeheeeeeeeeee

[shiny-jr]

pardon my late message i've been letting letting the current damnation chapters sink in the past couple of days after finally taking the quiz (im am still waiting with baited breath but like in a chill way for the rest) but HOLY. MOLY.

i did indeed notice that the MC's have different morality stances, and they match their crimes (granted im still trying to figure out which one did what. cuz rn i got stuck on iago coming fraud or tax evasion, even though theyre super down with murder, but like raven is WAY more down to murder somebody. im just nit paying enough attention to figure it out, really. im having too much fun vibin)

2 THE WAY THE CHARACTERS MAY NOT START OUT ENTIRELY YANDERE FOR THE MC AND INSTEAD DEVELOP THE OBSESSION FOR THEM LATER ON 🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌😭😭😭😭😭 BRILLIANTBRILLIANTBRILLIANT. ok so i got heartslabyul on my first attempt so it wasnt as like "obvious" even though trey and cater are both instantly "shocked" i was like "that could just be bc our character is weird it doesnt necessarily mean they yandere switch has been flipped pshaw! 🤭" BUT THEN eventually i got to pomfiore and epel confirmed it when he was like "ive been imagining things i never did before!" and i was like "oh snap! WAIT is *THIS* part of the punishment? like not JUST being sent to another world that is based on a story, but specifically a YANDERE DEATH TRAP? 🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯🤯"

cuz like, sure, the MC is doing what they can to survive but depending on which one theyre fine to just vibe and let the story take its course if theyve got a good chance to survive not doing anything special. but then the story always gets WEIRD, RIGHT?! stuff always goes wrong! was that part of the vision? or am i going conspiracy crazy?

anyway AMAZING WORK. also you really fed the vil simps on that one story. i thought i was over him and content to be like rook and admire from afar but that SCENE with his hands wrapped around the retainer 🥵 i darn near short-circuited. HOW DARE YOU! (please continue 😉)

its hard to choose a favorite story in this series and i dont want to speak too soon before theyre all out. but i do have favorite bits in each of them.

and i just love the endings to them all. i love the bittersweet nature of all the endings. like none, of them are really romantic in a comforting way (duh its a yandere story) but they do vary in romance level. like by far i think riddle's azul's and vil's are the most romantic while leona and jamil are quite cold and calculating or in jamil's case mostly possessive and manipulative on the surface. it's VERY interesting.

and also bc im silly and you brought up the yandere-ness of the other characters, i start to wonder what happens next in these stories (im not asking for sequels. oh heavens no! never! unless you wanted to, but im mostly just brainstorming character relationships and potential conflicts). like in the savannaclaw story, ruggie and jack are also glued to the MC but not in a really romantic way? ruggie has that "i want to be your #2/by your side forever" which could go either way, but to me initially reads as "jack was pushing his way into MY spot and i want to guarantee he cant have it" rather than a "one day i'll deserve to be by your side romantically and for now i want to ensure i'll always have that opportunity by being next to you and a priority of yours" and then comes leona's proposal at the end, and i was thinking "uhhh but mc is by your side as consort, then ruggie gets pushed out of his spot in favor of the husband taking over. even though ruggie could still be an advisor and confidant, its still like 'move over dude theres another taking priority over you" and then that gets me wondering "what would happen if MC turned down leona? what kinda havoc would he wreak if any? does that put the village in jeopardy if he gets pissed off? what if they accept and they're STILL screwed bc he stops paying attention to the village after he gets the throne? and then the chieftain is taken into the palace and away from the village and has no way back and theyre left to basically flounder without them?"

also i really like how you end your stories with pseudo-cliffhangers? i mean they are but also the plot is mostly resolved and whatever major things that needed to happen happened. and its just the character resolutions and epilogues you dont see. its entertaining. like i said, i like to imagine what happens next and you really leave some stuff open for that.

anyway! thank you so much for sharing your stories!

Oh, for the crimes, just look at one of the questions which I believe asks what you (the quiz taker/MC) committed. Those are currently five of the seven crimes I've listed before, and each MC has committed at least ONE of them. But, they could've always committed more too.

On that other topic, of characters going yandere, one thing I hate is when reading a story and for some reason the characters are already obsessed with the MC but for absolutely no apparent reason. And me personally, I enjoy a bit of build up, which is why I try to implement some in my writing. Which can be a bit hard to do within forty pages when all these other things are happening, but I manage for the most part.

[factorialsotherfandoms]

Initial thoughts on QSMP egg cookies (obviously both the system and thoughts will develop over time) (I am somewhere between a crow and a very confused rat, I am biased to certain eggs in certain ways, and I've really been enjoying stuff characters have been up to without the eggs - particularly Phil, but also Pac and Fit dungeon dates - so I was hoping the number of days needed would be reduced so the players could change without eggs to do personal lore or go exploring or building or whatever and the like. I am biased, it's not quite 7am and I was up til gone midnight before I gave up on the streams, disclaimer disclaimed):

Both the concept and the UI are adorable. Especially those happiness bars that's so cute. Can be a bit dark given they're Federation cookies, but it's still very cute.

3 cookies available a day for total of 9 cookies in principle makes it the same as before, buuut if a task is shitty or egg parents are a bit pressed for time they can split it over the week. 9 tasks (presumably) a week is better than 5 a day for 3 days in terms of CCs being able to pace themselves. Especially if there's shit day like the grappling squark day way back.

Cookies can presumably be saved week to week, which is also helpful.

Eggs not needing to be online to do the tasks helpful! Just gotta get online to eat the cookies.

I don't think tasks like "attend an event" or "visit a friend" can work on the new system and that's extremely sad. Maybe it can, but the handing in seems important. Purgatory did have the kills, buuuut going places doesn't have an easy server insides like murder does.

The half points for non-parents is really sad? I actually love babysitting streams and this is going to discourage them so hard. It's also going to cause problems if someone like Fit or Philza or BBH or Foolish ever goes away. Because that's then 6 days to keep each of their eggs alive. 18 cookies.

Limited number of cookies a week is going to cause problems. We know there's an irl meetup at the end of the year. I severely doubt there will be enough people on the server to get 60 cookies (itll be somewhere between 30 and 60, because non-parents only count for half), and I also doubt enough will have been saved up by then. Forcing someone to choose which of the other parents eggs live and die is horrific, and there is no option for them to just spend time grinding the tasks for the other eggs. Also if someone gets sick or something or their computer dies and can't stream? There's not necessarily stuff saved up to help.

Having to save up cookies means no more getting to Friday, seeing egg with no ticks, and grinding Friday-Saturday-Sunday. If you're looking after someone else's egg you now have to start Tuesday, and it's only possible if you don't have your own or you have a backlog. Which nobody does yet. Which sucks because who doesnt love to see a hundred eggies trailing after BBH (or Tazercraft as I recall happened for twitchcon France) while everyone else is at twitchcon?

Tallulah is going to discuss with the other admins her circumstances. So I'll hold speaking about her and Chayanne in terms of future stuff (and I didnt watch to the end of Phil's stream today so I dont know if he gave them the cookies or what, Tallulah did say a placeholder was in place). But also, this was a predictable problem they 100% should have accounted for in advance. Tallulah and Chayanne both having (in practice if not in lore) only one and the same caretaker who streams a limited but precisely known number of days (exactly as many as was required to keep them alive on the old system) should have been accounted for at the point of system creation. I can't see a fix which doesn't either make Phil a massive exception, or force him to put one of his kids up for adoption, and that's unhappy to me. I'm sure theyll think of something, but they should have already thought of it and implimented it before the new system was in place. Tallulah-admmin should have been able to answer Phil's questions about her parental status and how he's going to be able to provide for two eggs.

The above would be less of a problem (still a problem but less of one) without the 0.5 for non-parents rule. But it would still be a problem.

As someone between a crow and a rat, I'm going to be salty. Atm Richas only has Pac, which is fine. But I can see it getting extremely frustrating when Richas has 3 to 5 caretakers over the week all of whom can do his tasks so he can be done in a day and otherwise do fun stuff - and as before his parents can pass him around to work on their stuff - while Philza's back to doing only childcare (I'm sure his lore won't just die to it, but it's going to get pushed aside as are any of the building projects he was considering). Which was always going to happen with eggs back and isn't really a change from before, except that multi-parent eggs can be done in a day. Seeing how full Em's bar was when Phil and his eggs sang by spawn should have been fun, but it just made me feel bitter and I hate that.

Once players run the maths it's going to discourage them from taking time off when they need to, especially the single parents, and I know these are adult professionals with their own lives who can talk to people, but also theyve already proven they're shit at prioritising themselves. The Philza streaming at stupid o'clock in the morning while sick so Chayanne didn't die streams are kinda an excellent example, but also Purgatory (especially Bolas). Like that Philza stream is legendary but is frankly actually horrifying. And the admins know the players pull this shit and /are/ in a position of authority and /do/ have a level of control over not just the players' fun but their livelihoods, and they shouldn't be making it harder.

It's cute, it's adorable, it solves a couple of problems the old system had while introducing massive and predictable new ones. The system doesn't seem to have been thought all the way through or the consequences actually considered which is an oversight not a maliciousness, but much like a buggy or untested video game is much harder to fix after players have gotten their hands on it than before. Much like purgatory whatever they do to fix it is still going to taste bad because the initial release was flawed. Worse, it's going to be massively different reception by different bits of the community, because it's goingto make life a easier for some ccs and harder for others: Fit's only here one more day this week, and is already worried about who can take care of Ramon - he asked Philza who wanted to but can't because he has his own eggs to manage, and I just... that was very unpleasant. Especially with Chayanne writing "we can't let him die" and Philza saying words to the effect of what do you want me to do I don't even know if I can keep both of you alive. Meanwhile Em is already 2/3s done for the week. On Monday. Which in theory means Bagi could look after Ramon, but see the 0.5 and it punishing non-parents for trying to help out!

System makes it significantly easier to keep your kid alive if you're a parent with shared custody (3 parents and you can be done in a day), a little harder for single parents (other people have to work double), and (as currently stands with no super obvious solution) extremely difficult for the single parent with multiple eggs he's the only active parent of.

TBH if a game I was playing added something like this, especially as the player had no idea of the changing rules in advance, I'd fucking leave. It's a massive red flag to me - not of ill intent or a lack of love but of a lack of forethought and such. It'd make a neat special event or whatever, but only if everyone knows and agrees in advance and only if there's not consequences to refusing.

Plot stuff being hidden from players but much like with purgatory players reeeeeally need to be given more mechanical changes info in advance. I would bet if theyd shown these rules to the players in the discord Philza would have gone "what about Tallulah" and Fit would have gone "I've got a trip what about Ramon" and BBH would have gone "hey I've had to semi-regularly solo-parent 5+ eggs because cons and stuff how do I protect them" and this would have been smoothed out. (Maybe a parent can nominate babysitter/s and said babysitter can cash out as many times as they have eggs in their care each day? Idk). But because it got shown to players on screen with these massive holes still there, people (like me) will be salty and it'll never taste good.

[the-s1lly-corner]

Hello how are you :3? I was wondering if you could write E.J., Hoodie, and Masky with a s/o that has a lot of scars? (Toby too but platonic for him) I’m not sure how many people we can request so if it’s too many just Hoodie? I’m sorry if this makes you uncomfortable and thank you!

Various!Creepypastas w/ a scarred!reader

waaaah im so sorry for not seeing this sooner! i didnt recieve a notification for this ask!! really theres no limit to how many characters you can send in! i think my personal max varies from prompt to prompt!! mix of how they approach the concept of a scarred lover (friend in tobys case) with some hints of fluff! cause of scars will be vague as admittedly i didnt know if you meant general scars or SH! side note i hope this posts right! im writing this on my computer, im used to mobile!! + apologies for any weird wording or typos, im listening to music and im getting hyped!! not proof read we die like my spiderverse brainrot

Includes: Eyeless Jack, Hoodie, Masky and Platonic!Toby!

CWs: touch and go talk of potential past trauma, body image issues, vague mentions of SH(?) in EJs part + Toby's parts

admittedly admin doesnt know if its technically SH due to the nature and motiv but personally id still count it as such and tag it as such

Eyeless Jack;

he gets it, he really does. the basic run down of my hc/take on ej is that he wasnt always some flesh eating monster; just some dude who got caught up in some bad stuff

so naturally, he doesnt... really vibe well with the concept of eating human flesh, which can lead to a few... instances. from intentionally to accidentally harming himself while hes lost in his instincts

so hes no stranger to being a little roughed up around the edges

but hes a stranger to comforting; he'll likely approach it from a logical side before trying anything else. "you've been hurt," before going on a small tangent about the formation of scars. hes not the most... emotionally... good... available... person

so youre going to need to lay out the general basis for what you need for basic comfort, on days where your scars become an issue; be is needing comfort or a distraction. it may take him a while, but hell eventually start to pick up on cues and hints as your relationship develops

otherwise hes very neutral about them, again approaching them with a blunt view; seeing it as neither good nor bad. he doesnt draw attention to them, but he doesnt act like theyre gross

really just. vibing with it, doesnt make a huge deal of it since he feels he doesnt have any place to judge, nor does he feel its his business to pry for information

solid 6/10 imo, hell comfort you if you express that you need it but hell likely not go out of his way to do it

Hoodie;

Soft touches, he almost does it before he has your permission to touch you

naturally he has his own fair share of scars from various.. activities

really im still all jumbled up with how i wanna write him and masky; not sure if i want to make them like how they are in their MH source or lean into the proxy thing that was prominent in the early days of the fandom... lowkey leaning into the proxy thing for this post because im more... versed..? in that, but anyhow

hes more upfront and compassionate than eyeless jack, in fact hes probably the most caring out of the four in todays post... maybe thats because i read one (1) fic years back that changed my entire approach to his character but! yeah

subconsciously trails his hands on them when the two of you are holding one another; something gentle and intimate, not too obnoxious to make you self conscious, but not careful enough to go unnoticed

i view hoodie, and by extension brian if i end up considering him and tim fully seperate from their 'proxy' parts, as a very tactile person

true to the popular fanon interpretation, hoodie doesnt speak much. but that only makes him a better listener, so on days where things get hard, hell let you talk his ears off with anything thats bothering you. very rarely, hell speak up and offer some words of advice, most times hell inch closer to grasp you. though it does get awkward since most the time hes just. blankly staring at you silently without emoting or saying a word

overall? personally hes a 7/10 for me, i would rank him higher if he were more verbal, but thats just because admin has an easier time venting if its a two way convo; but overall hell make sure that your scars dont effect your worth

Masky;

very similarly to hoodie, masky also has his own set of scars for the same reasons

he probably starts pointing out his own scars to you and mumbles about where they came from if he knows their origins

this doesnt mean "oh hes invalidating your experiences and hes trying to make it about himself," but more so "hes showing that he really does get it and he doesnt mean to talk over you"

much like EJ he approaches scars with a very blunt and upfront mindset, but to a lesser extent. he admits that whatever led up to the tissue forming, it hurt. emotionally and physically, and hes not going to deny that simple fact. hell listen to you, have a conversation with you about it, and try to help you through whatever you may be currently going through regardless of if youre injury is relevant.

or at least, thats what hes trying to do.

hes still has his own personal issues regarding going about his own problems in a healthy manner but hey thats something for another post; maybe, if i remember

honestly this post doesnt have enough fluff imo, and i can kinda see masky doing this, but imagine he boops his mask against your scars in a mockery of a kiss (doesnt take off his mask often, in fact youll probably never ever see him without it on), i can see jack doing this too tbh

thoughts? 8/10, gets the bonus points for being less awkward to rant to imo, plus i think asides ej, i think i have a bias for masky for the simple fact i had the fattest crush on him when i was in middle school

Toby;

okay! this one is going to be interesting for one main reason! i actually havent touched tobys character in YEARS! so hes probably going to have the shorter list... obligatory i havent built any solid hcs for him past what was going on in the fandom in the 2010s, before toby briefly became a mild discomfort... but we're back in business baby!! (^^ dont feel bad for requesting for toby btw! hes no longer a discomfort, and if i didnt want to write for him i wouldnt be including him right here!!)

obviously we cant talk about his part without talking about his cheek. and other, similar hcs. while i dont think most of the self inflicted marks on his body were from a place of.. for lack of better words, darkness; it doesnt change the fact he still has them. i think a lot of them are from the fact he cant feel anything; accidental burns, gnawing through his cheek, digging his fingers deep into himself. really i could go into detail, but due to the aforementioned fact that my take on him isnt as developed as other characters + i really dont think its appropriate for this post (or really, anywhere on this account,), ill stop there

while he cant relate to the physical pain of what caused your scars, he can sympathize through your feelings. do you feel sorrow, or anger to whoever hurt you? hell be getting worked up right with you, because to him youre one of his closest friends

i feel like he doesnt talk much about his past, regarding his family. but hed tell you, and you can sure as hell bet that hell do his absolute damndest to grant you the same feeling of security.

hell probably touch and prod without truly meaning any harm, but thats because he can have problems with boundaries, but hell listen if you sit him down and tell him it makes you uncomfortable if it does

more so emotional than outwardly... supportive? idk the words, but hes very empathetic with you and tries to relate to you through emotion rather than feeling what you felt. honestly? kinda based for that, but maybe thats because i dont see feelings about this topic being touched on, usually its straight up about how the scar makes the person look or the physical trauma they had gone through, but idk, maybe thats just a me thing

he can be an asshole at times but hell usually backtrack and cool off somewhere else if you call him out on it imo

not sure if its because as im LITERALLY investigating his characteristics and interpretations as we speak, but i think im starting to relate to him so ER-OH!

anyways, i wish i could make his segment more... in tune with the characters above but its probably going to take me a while until im comfortable with how i portray this dude, which sucks because as a kid he was probably one of my favorites

i dont think im going to give toby a rating like the others; since i dont think i can accurate rate him due to the lack of proper concrete ideas outside of him being empathetic to your emotional pain since he cant relate on how much it hurt

im gonna end this here since im starting to sound like a broken record on tobys part so!

i hope you enjoyed this! characterization may be a little off but i blame that mostly on the fact that i kinda fell out of the loop in regards for writing for these guys (that damn spider movie! the brainrot threw me off my creepypasta grind!/j) but its good to be back writing for this fandom! it was a fun little brain exercise trying to figure out each character goes about this kind of thing without making them all the same!! with that being said, im going to go listen to an audio reading of tobys story so i can regrounded in his character and hopefully do him some justice in the future!

[bestworstcase]

@sailorb00 tags here

#i was also on the fence about the EA siblings and Theodore being related by looks alone (#... and the alice + dorothy comparison#mostly chalked it up to coincidence but now that they're conf. to be from Vacuo it's looking less like coincidence fsdf#then is the girl on the desk photograph Alyx before she and Lewis found the EA?#And Theodore juat inherited it? He grew up on his great-great grandfather/uncle/who know's stories about the EA being real?#Maybe in hopes that one day his sister would return and be welcomed by family? even if they're generations apart#if Lewis's pseudonym is Theodore Im gonna lose it#I mean we dont know his or the EA siblings' surnames.#IS THAT WHY THEODORE DOESNT GO BY HIS SURNAME#BC OF THE FAMILY LEGACY???#ok imma go sit down now before i hurt myself w/ speculation fsdf

YEAH SAME on the being like Doubt.jpg about a relation between theodore and lewis on the basis of… skin color, basically, but the minute i heard “i couldn’t believe they were from vacuo,” that’s a deliberate choice to link these kids to the setting for the next major story arc, and that’s happening in conjunction with several developments in the 9.11 animatic that suggest history is about to become very important (soaring popular support for the crown—probable mountain glenn history-repeating-itself theme with salem razing vale—oscar mentioning vacuo’s history of colonization—plus the great war having ended with ozma’s use of the sword in vacuo).

it’s very. raises eyebrow. alrighty then!

so whatever lewis did after coming home, other than writing tgwfttw, probably has some narrative relevance—might be as small as something jaune needs to find closure, or it might be bigger than that, who knows, but if it was a hundred and fifty years ago and it matters enough to be in the story, then the story needs a vehicle to deliver this information in a manner that feels naturalistic and non-arbitrary. (jaune-stumbles-across-loved-one’s-memorial-statue-by-chance once is a believable happenstance; twice, a cheap contrivance.)

the simplest way to do that is to introduce a vacuan character with some connection to lewis, and the obvious choice there is a descendent, because lewis lived a long enough time ago that family lineage is kind of the only plausible reason for a living character in the present to have a meaningful personal connection to lewis.

(and it can’t be oz, because oz had no idea the ever after existed.)

this descendent-character also ideally should be prominent enough in the story to matter for reasons unrelated to their relation to lewis, to avoid feeling shoehorned in. and they are probably human, given the apparent rarity of interracial human/faunus couples.

that pretty much narrows it down to theodore, or the asturias twins. NOW hysterical as it would be for jax and gillian to be descended from lewis, finn asturias is obsessed with “the old stories about [his] family” and yet doesn’t drop even a single hint about the ever after, so i think we can rule that out.

which leaves theodore. hmm.

that picture in his office:

She still remembered that her attention had been drawn to one photo in particular: a black-and-white picture of a young girl in pigtails and a checkered dress with a small black dog. She hadn’t mustered the courage to ask who she was to Theodore. A daughter? A sister? Whoever she was, Velvet could see the resemblance.

plainly evokes dorothy, and even bearing in mind that there may be discrepancies (theodore is described as blue-eyed in the book but has brown eyes in beyond, for example)… there’s nothing in this photo to suggest a resemblance to alyx beyond ‘young girl.’ alyx doesn’t wear her hair in pigtails, nor does she have checkered patterns anywhere in her design, nor does she have a little black dog. so i doubt it’s her.

but black-and-white does suggest it’s old. ‘sister’ seems a lot more plausible than ‘daughter’ for that reason, and ‘mother or aunt’ even more likely than either of those.

(the other thing about a young girl with a small black dog in This story, is.

it’s a symbol for the deaths of the ozlem girls and the inescapable grief that underlies the whole conflict between ozma and salem—there’s a reason she sends a giant monstrous hound to capture oz and then huddles in the shadows miserably looking at conjured images of her daughters until oscar wakes up; the black dog reappears as this terrifying monster in conjunction with the surfacing of all this pain.

so the question is to what extent this small black dog in the photograph is Just Toto, and whether the specific narrative symbolism is or isn’t in play here; Did This Girl Die? that would preclude her being theodore’s mother but she could well be an aunt or great-aunt.)

of course the point of drawing attention to this photograph might be as simple as hinting at theodore’s quote-unquote real ozian allusion; not dorothy but the silver shoes lost in the desert. which is an interesting angle to consider with regard to this possibility of lewis being his ancestor, because on the one hand there’s the silver shoes carrying dorothy home yet becoming irretrievably lost themselves in doing so, and on the other there’s alyx, the white rabbit, guiding people home yet never able to return home herself. see the rhyme?

in a sense jaune and team rwby bring alyx home with them, in that they know what happened to her and if there are descendants of lewis still living in vacuo then the question of why she never came home can finally be answered. and if the descendent is theodore, then the intertextual confluence between him and alyx is more resonant than the surface dorothy-and-alice comparison; the silver shoes are the home the white rabbit returns to, as a memory, a hundred and fifty-odd years late. and it matters.

but also i have a little hamster wheel churning at all times in the back of my mind and right now it’s churning around: sixty, seventy years before the great war began, vacuo was a colonial territory of mistral—before the great war, it had no formal government, it wasn’t a state, and oscar references the history of colonization in the 9.11 animatic. so that history and the history of the great war—which was for vacuo a war for independence—is narratively salient. lewis was a child who grew up in vacuo during the fractious decades preceding the great war; he gives a face to this period in history.

and jaune told lewis and alyx not only that he was from remnant but that he was from more than a century in their future; he and lewis “compared notes on remnant.” jaune couldn’t believe they were from vacuo, “back before the war, before huntsmen.”

they compared notes.

jaune’s grandfather fought in the great war.

so lewis went back home to colonial vacuo fifty, sixty, seventy years before the great war knowing that the great war was going to happen. knowing that within his lifetime vacuo would fight for its independence and win. knowing that there would be peace in the end. according to what blake says in 9.2, in the book, alyx “didn’t know [afteran] customs and started a war between the townsfolk” and that takes on a really different subtext now that we know the story’s author was a man who grew up in colonial vacuo knowing that the great war was coming.

either lewis and alyx were vacuan, or they were mistrali but born in vacuo; either way the tenor of the girl who fell through the world suggests that lewis’ sympathies lay with vacuo. both options stand to be compelling if he acted upon this knowledge more directly than writing anti-colonial themes into his children’s book. or books. there is also the boy who fell from the sky, mentioned in after the fall, and alice’s adventures in wonderland does have a somewhat lesser-known sequel.

i doubt lewis fought in the great war himself—he was probably in his seventies or older by then—but if he had children they would have been of an age to fight for vacuo, and if lewis had passed down to them the stories he knew of what remnant would be like after…

y’see how lewis could have ended up playing a really important role in vacuo’s side of the great war, if he’d decided not to leave matters in the hands of fate? jaune told him about what the world would be like after the great war, but lewis also figured out that jaune knew more than he let on, figured out that jaune remembered a story lewis hadn’t written down yet. he knew that knowledge of the future could shape the future, because if it hadn’t been for jaune and jaune’s foreknowledge of his book, he might not have written it the way he did, as a guide for how to get out of the ever after.

so he goes home, knowing the great war will happen and what the outcome will be—or else knowing that it might happen that way. who did he become with that knowledge? what did he choose to do with what he knew? the one thing we know is he became a storyteller, and “storytellers have great power” is a prominent narrative theme.

salem inspired the world to rebel against the brothers by telling the story of what they had done to her, and speaking of her vision of a time when humanity could be free.

lewis…?

[wewerebornsextuplets]

recently i realized i havent given... any context, really, on kiru's family outside of her being yana's cousin, which is honestly a little shocking because i think about it a LOT and it provides a lot of context for why she presents herself the way she does, both in terms of physical appearance and in terms of actions/character as a whole. i also need to explain the nature of her relationship with yana, so this will be the tell-all on kiru's upbringing, as well as some elaboration on her general disposition! you know the drill! this one ended up being much longer than some of my other long winded posts, which is a little scary. but under the cut we go!

BEFORE I START i do want to disclaim: for the sake of canon compliance, assume anything i say about kiru's parents [particularly her mother] and grandparents' attitudes doesn't apply to yanagida's upbringing or family. as much as i love headcanons and speculating about background characters [theres a reason s1e9 is my favorite episode], i also want kiru's lore to be taken somewhat independently from those headcanons/interpretations if so desired :-)

In order to make things a little less confusing [mostly for myself, because im very scatterbrained], i have a little family tree graphic. thing. mostly to keep track of names + relations and all that! ill be referring to kiru's parents by name for that same reason. but uhhh tada 🎉

OKAY BUT FOR REAL. the actual timeline is like this: kiru's childhood was pretty normal to start. her mother [mayumi] was a bit strict, but it wasn't anything too crazy, though she did prefer spending time with her dad [kentaro] during this time. this was all upended around the time she was eight, though, when her family had to move into her grandparents' home after her dad fell ill. kentaro, a lifelong smoker, had developed lung cancer, and the costly nature of treatments for his condition meant that they could no longer afford to life in their old house. in addition, kentaro's condition meant that mayumi had to essentially take over as his caretaker at home during this time, leaving kiru's grandparents as the ones to raise her.

i imagine this side of her family had a decent amount of social power within the community [this may just be a thing in my town, but you know those families where it feels like theyre kind of everywhere, like the school staff, the local politicians, etc.? theyre like that], which led to her grandparents being quite strict, if not authoritarian to a degree, with a particular emphasis on what behaviors were considered "acceptable". as such, while kiru was greatly encouraged in her academic endeavors, there was near equal pressure on how she presented herself outside of her studies. while the physical aspect of "dress neatly and maintain good hygiene" was part of this presentation, it also included a HEAVY emphasis on her emotional regulation. It reached a point where she began to suppress nearly any strong emotions she had, because she felt that there was never a Right time to feel or express them.

^ it was kind of like this. not really any forceful or outright Mean enforcement of this ideal, but definitely a conditioning that was strong enough to impact kiru, especially at such a young age. past this i think they would be fairly normal as far as grandparents go, just not quite as nurturing.

even in the present day, kiru's calm demeanor is only really maintained because of her belief that sharing her feelings would disgust or embarrass the people around her. growing up, strong expression of any emotion was childish and unsightly, and she still conducts herself with this in mind; its not something she feels about others, but she doesnt extend the grace she gives others in this regard to herself.

BUT back to the timeline. after moving in with her grandparents, kiru got a bit closer to yanagida, who would often visit their home, since yknow. same city and all. during this time kiru was pretty lonely, since kentaro's illness meant she had to spend less time with him, and as a result her and yana spent much of that time together instead. yana particularly enjoyed kiru's knowledge of english, since kentaro primarily spoke bonin standard english in the home + taught kiru the language. in turn, kiru appreciated that yana didnt see her through the same lens of "respectable young girl" that everyone else in the family seemed to have picked up since moving, and they were able to meet each other on more of an equal level of just being friends.

this pattern continued up until kiru was 10, when kentaro passed away. aside from the obvious, this was a particularly stressful time for kiru and mayumi, since kentaro wanted to be buried in Chichijima + have his funeral procession held there. as a result, kiru spent about a month of that summer away from home, on the island with her father's side of the family. away from the eagle eye of her mother, she tried to make the most of the time, but found herself too distraught to enjoy any of it to the fullest. she was too ill-equipped to tell her relatives there how she was really feeling, so they mostly carried on with the impression that a young kiru was being "strong" in the face of kentaro's death and was taking it well, even though it was quite far from the truth. upon her return to mainland japan to start her new school year, most of her family carried on with the impression that all had returned to normal. that is, except for yanagida.

obviously, only being about thirteen at the time of kentaro's death and not really having a strong understanding of the expectations kiru was under at home [not to mention having the emotional intelligence typical of a boy his age-- that is to say, not much], he didn't really understand Why her behavior had changed so much since moving in with her grandparents, or why her demeanor had taken a near 180 in that time. but he didn't really need to understand the why to know that Something was wrong, even before kentaro had passed.

what he wasnt expecting, though, was her breaking down sobbing the second he asked her how she was doing after she got back from chichijima. since yana was Also a kid, and had never put on the same pressure that the rest of the family put on on her, kiru felt a bit safer talking to him with the confidence that he wouldnt berate her for feeling that way or be disappointed in her. he consoled her about as well as he could [or as well as any 13 year old boy could] and assured her she could come to him if she was ever feeling down, but instead she assured him she would be fine.

after this event, yana started worrying about her quite a bit, but he wasnt really sure how to go about Expressing this concern [either to her or anyone else], so he just kind of let it sit there. as time went on, and kiru started to return to a more cheery persona, he let go of that worry for the most part and they returned to their old routine fun for the time being.

yanagida wasnt the only person whose relationship with kiru changed after kentaro's death, though. mayumi, who was wholly unequipped to handle the intense grief that kentaro's passing brought her, was wracked with a mixture of guilt, anger, and resentment; she regretted having ever met and married him, now knowing the pain it would come to cause her, and she even began to regret kiru's birth. its a feeling she was deeply ashamed of. she loved her daughter, but every time she looked at kiru, every time she heard her name, mayumi was acutely aware of the fact that kentaro was no longer there to share these memories, that he wasn't going to be there to see her grow any further. ashamed as she was of this feeling, it never fully went away, even if she made efforts to ignore it. the gap left between them was never fully mended, and though kiru couldn't place it at the time she definitely got the sense that mayumi didn't really want her around. as a result, kiru began to spend a bit more time around her grandparents, whom she had grown closer to since they were the ones raising her for the past couple of years.

as junior high rolled around for kiru, and as yanagida was going into high school, the distance between them grew as well; yanagida was beginning to exercise more independence from his family and spend more time with friends, and kiru was doing the same. they still made time for one another, though, walking home together once in a while when yanagida wasn't in the mood for hanging out with his friends. most of the time, though, they just stuck to their new groups. it was a small period of respite and was actually pretty chill for kiru, all things considered

once it came time for kiru to start testing into different high schools, mayumi became a bit more involved with her daughter's life. more specifically, she became more involved in how kiru presents herself; if youre a daughter [or former daughter] youre probably familiar with the specific underhanded flavor of body shaming she experienced. kiru and yanagida also lost contact during this time, as yanagida was preparing to enter college and they were both too busy to keep up with one another too well. he was definitely a little concerned with all these changes regarding her appearance, though

now, to this point, i want to say that mayumi was NOT being intentionally malicious or even aware of her harm during this time. during her youth, mayumi was ridiculed and ostracized for a more unkempt appearance that came as a result of an intense focus on her academic endeavors and matters other than her looks. not wanting to see her daughter endure the same thing, she tried to encourage kiru to put more care into her appearance. even so, her tactless expression of this concern ended up hurting kiru more than anything else.

high school came and went, with kiru attending St. Hanagaoka's, a prestigious all-girls school in the city. nothing particularly bad happened during this time, but kiru regards this time in her life rather poorly, because she spent most of it trying to Appear a certain way, rather than living how she actually wanted to live. its during this time that kiru became more acutely aware of much of her desires and identity; as femininity began to feel more like a prison, she found herself looking at the boys her age a bit differently. she had a boyfriend or two during her time at school, sure, but she never really felt that it was any different from having a friend. slowly, she realized the feelings she thought were admiration, or crushes on boys, were really just a sense of longing; she longed to dress like them, to be able to cut her hair short like them, even to pursue love with girls the way that they did. though she was still quite confident that she was a woman, she knew she wasn't the kind of woman her family wanted her to be.

as such, when she finally got into college, kirumi cut contact with her mother and grandparents almost completely. her first year of college was a year of rebellion and experimentation; primarily with her appearance. at first she'd wondered if her discomfort for feminine clothing was the result of the KIND of femininity she was portraying, but quickly realized this wasnt the case. so the kirumi futch era was only about a semester long. after this, she started to present as more masculine, and this is around the time when she starts getting more concerned with fitness in terms of strength; she didn't manage to get built like yuko miyamoto just by standing around, after all! its during this time that kiru also began to make actual friends, though her problems with connecting to others emotionally made this a rather difficult endeavor when it came to maintaining those relationships.

during her second year of college, her grandparents both passed, roughly six months from one another, due to old age. while she had mixed feelings on the matter due to her strained relationship with them, she still attended both funerals. at the latter of the two, her and mayumi got into a bit of a fight because of a comment mayumi made about kiru "destroying" herself. this ended up pushing kiru, out of pure spite, to shave her head the second she got back on campus.

it ended up being a mistake.

not one without a silver lining, though! this drastic change in appearance ended up catching the eye of one of her acquaintances, who was a close friend of her roommate. you might know her as keiko :-)

during this time, keiko was just starting her transition, and was still getting a feel for the big city. the two initially bonded over a shared love of terrible movies [as one of kiru's biggest hobbies is watching shitty movies to laugh at them], and kiru gave keiko many of her old clothes + some tips for hair and makeup now that she no longer needed them. but over time, they became quite close. in particular, they bonded over the fact that they experienced pretty strong discomfort towards gender roles and expectations in their upbringing; while keiko's family was much more loving and supportive than kiru's, she still felt an intense obligation to be seen as ""man enough"", mainly to her peers, having been bullied quite intensely during her high school years for her transness.

i could probably write a whole separate post about kiru and keiko's relationship [not any time soon though. jesus.], but the long and short of it is that they became a couple during their third year together at college :-) this is also the year that kiru secured her job at the butcher's shop in akatsuka, having been a bit of a floater before then.

after graduating with her bachelor's, kiru began to attend a veterinary school in pursuit of a doctorate in the field. they lived separately, but visited one another's apartments about as frequently as could be managed.

one summer, when school was out and she was less busy, kiru began volunteering at a local animal shelter, wherein she met and fell in love with a little cat named kabosu. after adopting her that autumn, on one particularly busy night, kabosu broke out of the apartment, and... hey, i've told this part of the story before!

past that, uh... not really a lot to say! i have a whole storyline thought out about kiru and yanagida getting back into contact + how that intertwines with some other family drama on kiru's side of things, but thats an idea that i want to dedicate a different post to since i have. a LOOOOOT of thoughts on that whole arc. ill do that eventually but again, definitely not anytime soon. if i make another post like this too soon i think my brain will explode

BUT YEAH! if you managed to read this far, thank you!! i put a LOT of thought and consideration into kiru's background; i didnt want it to be like. senselessly edgy. since this IS a gag anime in the end. even still i am a sucker for complicated family dynamics so i tried my best to strike a good balance there

[koiiiiijiii]

Who would be your top 5 favorite Windbreaker characters?

obviously #1 is my hubby Sangho!! he is quite interesting character as cyclist and as individual, i would love to see his WHOLE story, about his childhood, how he became cyclist, how he met Maheon, what was role in Maheon death(i still hope he just was on phone with him and nothing more) bc in 3 season there was frames where he saw Mahon in his nightmare, so i assumed that Sangho actually feels guilty about his death. also his relations with Vinny is quite interesting too, i think he see himself in Vinny (and prob wish someone like him would be cooler as his younger brother then current one💀💀). and he generally looks handsome, and act like my type of men, so yes, he is my current cutie patootie kinn

the second place of honor is occupied by Dom. he is pure good boy, put so much effort into training, into friendship, of course he can be too much impulsive in his actions, like when Vinny left hummingbird, but he still such sweet boy. i love easygoing people bc myself is just like that, and Dom seems to be the same, i feel like he would be up for everything, wanna go run at 1am (my current canon event) he is up to, wanna wear that weird couple outfit together? hell yes, like i feel he would be up to many things as long as he doing it with his friends/partner. OH AND DONT EVEN START TOPIC WITH YUNA SHE DOESNT DESERVE HIM HE JUST TOO GOOD FOR HER.

third place goes to my boy Wooin. i love many tropes with him, he seems also as really interesting character but i interested in him only personally, like yes, we saw that you used to be professional cyclists but how the hell bro end up as dealer??? also his past, when we saw frames where he sat alone in empty room with book. ta hell? yong seok can’t just drop it without explanation!! so im interested in his life story aside from cycling.

#4 in my list goes to Hwangyeon!! ohhh this boy so tough and arrogant… but from latest chapters we learn that he had a reason. i don’t condone or forget what he did to Vinny and Mia, it was awful, but his development as character is interesting, how he went from just shitty guy, to shitty guy for a reason. i also find him quite handsome, especially in his bulky era… big boy big boy!! he gives vibes of really goofy person if he would be close enough with someone, like i mentioned somwhere that you would have his cringiest photos in your gallery but cringy in funny or cute way, not weird💀

i really don’t know to whom pass 5 place, so it would be honorable mention for HAJUN‼️June, VINNY, sung, juhwan, min u and mia i love their relationship, TJ (i enjoyed each % of his screen time), kazuma and kaneshiro, SHELLY my girl deserves so much more attention as cyclist, aaaand juwon (just for pretty face and money)

i went lil bit too much about it but yeah, that’s it,

xo-xo💪🏻😎