#still. why won’t she talk to me. i know i left town for the whole summer but still

[girldoomed]

she’s so pretty she’s so funny she’s so cute when she dances she has the cutest laugh i hate herrrrr

[slutofpsh]

f1 racer | psh

part two

pairings: park sunghoon

synopsis: f1 racer park sunghoon is the ace of their team until he got into a terrible accident causing of his sudden hiatus. the incident injured his shoulder and affected his mental health. you are hired by his mother to help him get through this tough times as you are one of the best psychiatrist in town. he hated the idea of being vulnerable so instinctively, he hates you. he hates how you try to get into his head for him to open up and he hates his parents for meddling with his life like he’s a kid. but he couldn’t deny that you are exceptionally beautiful and he can’t help his cock from twitching just by imagining pushing you down on your office table, fucking you deep and hard until you can’t think straight anymore.

wc: 15k

warnings: mdni. smut with slight plot, lots of dirty talking, degrading, corruption kink, p into v raw (please always use protection), dom sunghoon, slight rough sex, reader experiencing sexual harassment. IF YOU DON’T LIKE ANY OF THIS PLEASE FEEL FREE TO SCROLL AWAY.

note: i have no right and enough knowledge with medical terms so disregard my claims as it came from my imagination to fit my plot. i’m new with writing smuts so please don’t give rude comments. i am still learning. also please send me asks and reblog my work. it will help a lot. thank you so much!

slutofpsh 2024 © all rights reserved.

After how Sunghoon dismissed you, you didn’t expect him to reach out first. You can still remember the bitter feeling that poisoned your whole system while you’re taking a bath that day. The pain between your legs was incomparable from how your heart was aching that time.

His cold tone and how he asked you to leave right after kept flashing back to your mind. It was such an awful experience. A part of you gets pissed at him for acting like a jerk after taking your v card, but you also know that maybe you caught him off-guard as well. Besides, it was your decision to give yourself to him that day.

It’s honestly making you feel frustrated. Were you crossing the line when you suddenly asked that question? Now you are certain that his ex-girlfriend has something to do with it. Your chest tightens just by thinking about it. He’s still very affected by her. There’s a big possibility that he still have feelings for her.

You threw your head back and stared at your ceiling. This isn’t how it suppose to be. You should be focusing on your work and not worrying about an F1 racer who probably don’t give a care about you.

The wall clock caught your eye and suddenly realized that it will soon be his session for today. Since its wednesday, he will be the one coming at your office. It makes you hopeful and you’re already rehearsing what to tell him the moment he walks in.

You wanted to apologize for suddenly dropping that question out of nowhere without even considering if he’s mentally prepared for it.

Your thoughts are interrupted when your phone chimed.

Sunghoon: I won’t be coming today.

Oh.

Your mind went blank right after receiving that message. All the words you tried to compose and prepare the moment you come face to face with him became useless. You can’t help but to feel a little disappointed and upset about it. He’s obviously trying to avoid you and it hurts just by thinking about it.

The amount of efforts and time you exerted just to be close with him seems to be put into waste when he’s pushing you away like this.

Was it really about the professional reason why you’re hurting? Or was it your heart cracking because of him? Eitherway, you don’t like the feeling of it.

Since Sunghoon is the last patient scheduled for today, you informed your secretary that he’s not coming. Although a little confused, she asked if you need something else or if there’s any patients left that you’re expecting to arrive.

You told her that she can wrap up and go home early today as that’s what you’re about to do. This thing going on between you and the f1 racer sure is draining all of you. You just want to be inside a bathtub, soaked in hot water and having a bottle of wine.

Yeah, that’s right. That could totally help with your mood.

A knock from your office door snapped you back to reality. It slowly opened revealing Hana whose now flashing you a small smile. It didn’t slipped from your friend how you’ve been gloomy these days. She took notice how you’re not mentioning the famous f1 racer as well, assuming that he has something to do with your foul mood.

“Hi,” she greets and you tried so hard to flash her a smile.

“Hello. I thought your sessions are done already? What are you doing here?”

She pursed her lips and walked inside. “I was thinking if you’d want to spend time with me? Your secretary said you’re out early today.”

Your eyes almost watered because of what she said. Hana completely understands you despite your resistance of oversharing informations regarding Park Sunghoon. She understands how you're always been a little private with your personal life.

As a friend, all she can do for you is accompany you whenever you need someone to be there by your side.

The two of you planned to stay in her expensive crib that she’s very proud of. Actually, you really like her apartment since its very pretty and cozy. There’s some vibes in it that you cannot explain.

After stopping to get some snacks, you head over her place. She was continuously talking about this one hot client of her. Obviously, she likes him but gets defensive that she just really finds him hot.

“So...” your head snaps at her direction when she suddenly halt her words like as if she’s waiting for you to look.

You got lost in time and have no idea for how long have you two been sitting outside her balcony talking about random things.

“Hmm?” you hummed, asking her what she wants to say.

She bit her lower lip, contemplating whether to go for it or stop being nosy. After ending the debate with her inner self, she sighs heavily and sets down her glass of wine to fully focus on you.

“What’s up with the F1 racer? He skipped today. That’s new.” she finally dropped the bomb.

You were kind of expecting it, but to actually be asked about it still caught you dumbfounded. You don’t know the exact words to use in order to explain what happened on your last session.

Surely you cannot mention what the director did to you and you’re too embarrassed to tell her he just pop your cherry.

“Maybe he just don’t feel like seeing me today.” the pain in your eyes didn’t slip from her. Hana may not always hear you rant things towards her, but she knew whenever you’re not okay.

She pursed her lips and reaches for your free hand to hold it. “When did he ever feel that way? As far as I remember, Park Sunghoon is totally so into you.” and even winked at you to make you feel better or at least laugh.

“I think I made him mad.” tears fills your eyes to the brim that made her go slightly alarmed.

“Why? What happened?” she gently grabs the glass of wine from you to avoid spilling any of its content.

“I asked him about his ex and after that he started acting cold. Maybe...” your words halt and emotions oozes from your eyes. Hana can see how worried and scared you are by your own thoughts. She felt so bad.

“...maybe he still loves her? What about me, then? What am I to him, Hana?” and tears started to flow out from your eyes, your cries filled his balcony as she tugs you closer to her.

Hana never saw you like this. Crying over something. You always have a strong impression towards her. The type of person who handle things like a boss. Very workaholic and once you set your focus onto something, you will, in no doubt, get it.

And so to see you like this caught her off-guard. She doesn’t know what to do or how to properly comfort you, but of course she tried. She caress your arms as she embraces you, calming you down. She lets you have your moment to let it all out as she assumed you’ve been keeping it in.

“I t-think I fell in love with him, Hana. And I’m so scared because I’ve never felt this way and to think he still loves...” you couldn’t finish your own words as you started crying hard. Hana shakes her head side by side in disapproval, eyes starting to water as well.

“I’m sure he doesn’t love her anymore, y/n. Don’t think it that way, okay?” she cupped your face to make you look at her eyes.

“Just give him time to process his own emotions. He went over through hard times that makes it a little harder for him to decide about things, yeah? Maybe you just caught him off-guard as well.”

Your lips pursed into a pout and realized she had a point. Sunghoon’s going through something. Your priority should be to make him feel better and not confront him about his feelings for you.

You nodded your head and slowly rest your head at her shoulder, cuddling closer. She wraps her arms around your shoulder to pull you closer to her body. She sighs and you felt so much better letting your worries out. Like a big chunk of emotions been lifted off from your chest that made your breathing more stable, your way of thinking became much better as well.

Like what Hana said, you gave him time to settle his own thoughts. Thursday came and you didn’t bothered sending a text message for him as well. You tried hard to divert your attention towards some other things. Thankfully, you’ve managed to do that.

Friday came and you’re very much nervous to go on your day. It was suppose to be your day off from the hospital and Sunghoon’s the only client you have for the day but Hana called you early in the morning.

“Can you please take over my session this morning? It will be just quick I promise! It slipped off from my mind that I have that scheduled today and I already booked my flight to Hawaii.”

Your brows furrowed as you put your coffee to the machine, one hand resting at your hip.

“Hawaii? Suddenly? Why haven’t I heard about this plan?”

Of course you can fill her spot for today. You’ve done it for other people before, there’s no reason for you to decline her offer as well.

She giggles, “I didn’t invite you because I know you won’t come anyway since you’re saving up! This is so sudden too! My mom asked me to tag along their trip and since the director will be out of the country for almost two months, I figured I should go to a vacation as much as I can!”

This time you’re even more intrigued of what you heard. You leaned over the kitchen counter and lift your hand to nibble on your nails.

“T-The director will be gone for almost two months?” you asked, baffled.

“Yes! Haven’t you heard about it? Anyway, you should get more rest now that he’s not around! I know how much you want to earn more, but please have some fun as well. We’ll plan a trip for the two of us once I’m back!” she kept going on that slowly became muffled by your own thoughts.

The amount of relief that dawned you after hearing the news of the director being not around was being overwhelming for you. To think that you don’t have to feel anxious of bumping over that monster relieved you.

“I will buy you something from her as a thank you gift of taking over this client for me!” Hana snapped you back to reality.

You giggled and glanced over the machine when it made a sound, indicating that your coffee is now ready.

“Okay, have fun with your mom.” and then the two of you decided to end the call.

After you get ready for your day, you drove straight to the hospital and met with Hana’s client. Like she said it was just a short consultation and nothing heavy. An hour and a half passes by so fast. Your secretary ringed your intercom to let you know its over.

You guided the client out to the door and tell her she did well for today. She seemed very satisfied with your session and thanked you. A smile is what you responded her before bidding goodbyes with her.

Now, you started preparing yourself to leave and go straight to Sunghoon’s place. Your heart started thumping just by the thought of that man. He didn’t send any messages yet that tells you not to come so you’re somehow hoping he’s expecting to meet you today. I mean, he cannot avoid you forever right?

Eitherway, you already set your mind to go and check him yourself. You wanted to convince yourself that you just want to do your job properly, but you know that you’re doing that fot personal reasons. That you want to come and see him because you missed him so bad.

You heard your office door opens that slightly made you jolt. Thinking it was your secretary, you didn’t bother to look over and check. You just continued fixing your things so you can leave.

“You can leave after I finish here, (name). That’s the only client I’ll be meeting here on the office for today since I will go to the Parks to meet with Mr. Park Sunghoon.” you tried to inform her.

You heard the door closed so you assumed she’s inside. Finding it odd not receiving any responses from her, you decided to turn around to look and you almost drop your car keys at the sight of Park Sunghoon by the door.

He looked so good as usual. His slightly long hair brushed perfectly as he rocks his semi formal attire, one hand inside his pocket. He stares right at your eyes that made your knees instantly weak.

“M-Mr. Park.” you stutter.

He pursed his lips and sighs heavily. He may seem like he’s calm, but Sunghoon’s very nervous right now. He took all of his courage to come here and see you. He knew what he did last time was wrong and he can’t find the will to meet you. Not after treating you that bad. He figured you may hate him now. But damn, he misses you so much. He missed you so bad that he might go crazy if he didn’t come and see you.

He didn’t say anything and started walked towards your direction. You held on your table for support as you can feel your knees getting even weaker as he approach closer. Seeing him again after days of being away from each other just made it even more emotional.

“W-What are you doing here? I was just about to go and meet you—” your words cut as he clash his lips on your shaking lips. He placed his hands on your hips, making sure you won’t fell.

You moaned, eyes getting teary of being overwhelmed. You felt his kisses, his touch and his warmth.

After the heated kiss and when he realized you two needed air, he pulls away. He kept his eyes straight at yours, letting your foreheads touch each other.

“I’m sorry for how I acted the last time. It was such a jerk move.” he whispered sincerely that tugs your heart.

You pout and raised your arms to wrap it over his neck.

“It’s fine. I understand that maybe I went overboard. I shouldn’t have let my personal emotions take over me.”

He licked his lips, taking a short glance at your slightly swollen lips. He was tempted once again after having a taste of something he’s been craving for a while. He sighs, calming himself down. This isn’t about him.

“Let me make it up to you.” and he leans even closer, tugging your body closer to his. His lips dangerously inches away from yours.

A small smile spreads across your face.

“You don’t have to, Hoon.”

He leans and placed a peck on your lips. “I want to. Will you let me take you out on a date tonight?”

Your mouth gapped in surprise. “A date?” you repeat his words, bewildered.

He nods his head, trapping his lower lip over his teeth. Sunghoon pressed his body towards you that made you giggle.

“But we already skipped two of our sessions.” you reminded him. As expected, he seemed totally unbothered.

“Then this will be the third time.” he smirks and arched his brow. “Please?”

You stared straight to his eyes and eventually surrenders.

“Okay.” you agreed that made him smile wider.

“Thank you.” he says and leans for another kiss. You giggled returning his affection and letting yourself be drowned by his kisses. His hand playfully roams around your whole body like claiming his territory.

“I have something for you.” he mumbles after leaning away. You can see how his eyes are starting to be clouded by lust and longing.

It stirs excitement inside you. Just having him this close again and staring at you this way makes your core hot and wet. The way he affects you is crazy. Its even crazier because you know he’s the only one that can make you feel this way.

“What is it?”

A mischievous grin spread across his handsome face before he lets one of his hand go from your hips to slid inside his pocket. Your eyes looked curiously to what he’s trying to get.

He fished out something and you can see its color pink. Your brows furrowed in confusion as to what is that thing. It seems soft and like a toy. Your hand unclasped from him to try and hold the thing he was holding.

“What’s that?” you asked too innocently that made Sunghoon almost go feral. Just the genuine look of innocence in your eyes were enough to make him lose his mind. He thought that during the times he was with you and with all the things you two had done together, he might have corrupted you enough.

But it seems like he was wrong. He hasn’t corrupted you enough for you to know that what he’s holding right now is a small vibrator.

He gulped, trying to calm himself and his dick.

“A vibrator.” he announced that made you instantly blush.

“W-What...” you are unable to ask further question as he moved quickly to carry you and make you sit at your office table.

“Hoon, wait what are you gonna do?”

He smiles, “We’re going to have some fun, baby.” and he placed a kiss at your cheeks.

His hand reaches for your thighs and he spread it enough. You’re about to protest and ask more, but he quickly kisses you to distract you from what he’s about to do. His hand made its way inside your skirt and searches for your underwear.

You moaned and tried to pull away, but his lips just chases yours. He eventually managed to take off your underwear, his bare fingers touching your wet core.

“Ugh,” you moaned sensually.

“Already so wet for me?” he smirks so proudly that made you feel so flushed.

He raised his other hand that was holding the vibrator and placed it near your mouth.

“Coat it with your saliva, baby. So it will go in smoothly.” he instructed, eyes flickering with so much excitement.

You obliges and opens your mouth. Sunghoon stares as he dips the vibrator inside your mouth, your tongue twirling around to make sure every part is fully coated of your sweet saliva.

“Fuck, you look so hot.” he mumbles and pressed his lips at your cheeks before gently pulling it out from your lips, making an unintentional ‘plop’ sound.

Your heads stared down while he placed it at your entrance. It was wet and full of your juice already so it slid easier. You kind of felt the stretch but it was a good one. The kind you’ve missed for a while.

“How does that feel?” he asks carefully as he lifts his gaze to look at your half-lidded eyes.

You gulped, salivating a bit due to pleasure of having something inside you.

“G-Good.”

He nods and grabs this one small device. Your mind is pretty clouded and occupied by that small toy inside of you that you didn’t realized that in order for it to be called vibrator, it needs to vibrate. And that will only happen using that controller Sunghoon’s holding at the moment.

“Okay, let’s start it with the mildest intensity.” he says softly near your ears and pressed something.

You jolt at the sensation it was giving you, a hand grabbing him by his arm. “Oh my gosh,” you mumbled surprised.

He chuckles, “How does that feel, pretty? Much better?”

He leans his forehead to yours as you nod your head slowly. It was a foreign feeling, but it was good. Really really good.

“I think we can put it higher.” he didn’t even wait for what you’re opinion about it and raises the intensity making you open your mouth. Your eyes shut abruptly and the grip over his arms tightened.

“W-Wait, this is too much...” you mumbles feeling everything in you just vibrates and shaking along with this small device.

Your mind are slowly becoming blank and filled with nothing but lust. The vibration is so perfect and the way Sunghoon showers you with kisses makes it even better. He kisses, sucks your skin and sometimes bite you using his canine teeth, making sure he mark you pretty well.

“I’m c-coming,” your words snapped Sunghoon out from his trance as he pulls away and manipulated the controller to make it feel better for you.

As you came, your body loses it strength but thankfully Sunghoon was there to support you, wrapping his arm around your waist. He placed a kiss on your shoulder then at your temple, whispering praises.

“You did so well for me, baby.” he kisses you again at your lips then flashes you a sweet smile.

You smiled and leaned to give him a kiss too. You’re still high from your orgasm that you couldn’t say anything to him. After he pulls away, your eyes watch how he slid your underwear inside his pocket. His eyes are darted at yours when you lift your gaze up to look at him.

He smirks shamelessly, unbothered that he was caught red handed of pocketing your underwear without consent.

“Hey, I can’t go eat dinner without it.” you pout.

He chuckles, “Oh, you can do it. Besides you have that inside you to keep your cum inside.” he smirks that made your eyes grow big.

“What do you mean?”

He fixes your hair, “Am I going to have this inside me while we eat outside?”

He smirks, already giving you the answer.

“Yes. We’re going to have so much fun tonight.” and with that you are left with no choice but to go out on a date with a freaking vibrator inside of you.

You don’t know how exactly you look, but you bet it was awkward. The way you kept moving around, squirming out of discomfort is quite noticeable. You’re inside the elevator and thankfully it was just the two of you heading down at the underground parking lot of the hospital.

Sunghoon chuckles and held your hips tighter, holding your position.

“Stop moving around.”

You grunted, “It feels uncomfy. I feel like my cum will drip out from it.”

He leaned down, lips touching your ears as he whispers, “I bet not. Your pussy is so tight it left no gap for the vibrator.” his raspy voice rings through your ears that made you shiver.

When you arrived at the parking lot, Sunghoon guided you somewhere. It was a black rang rover and a man went out from it then wait patiently until you two came near the vehicle.

You gave him an awkward smile as you still feel bothered by that thing you’ve been keeping between your legs. He bows slightly.

“Let’s go to the restaurant.” Sunghoon says firmly and opened the door for you.

So this is his driver. You’ve been informed by his parents that ever since the incident, he refused to drive. Whenever he have to go see you at your office during wednesdays, he have his own driver to accompany him.

Sunghoon sat beside you and tugs you closer to him while his driver started driving. You felt conscious now that you have another person around you, but it doesn’t seem like the same way for him. Since his touches became more bold.

You gave him a warning look and held his wrist tightly to prevent his hand from entering your skirt completely. His hand was just chilling at your thigh a while ago, and now its slowly moving upwards.

“I just want to check if its still there.” he reasoned out with a grin on his face.

You rolled your eyes at him, “Like it can get out by itself, huh? Of course its still there.” you tried hard to whisper so his driver won’t hear any of this wild things you two had been doing.

He pouts mockingly, “I want to check it myself.” and tugs his arm away to unclasp your hold before he dips his hand further inside your skirt.

You pressed your lips together to prevent any moans from coming out and just lets him do what he wants. This is why you think its dangerous for you to hang around Park Sunghoon often. Because you are too weak for him and you always ends up letting him have his way.

When his fingers touch your core, he graze it gently on your slit and smirk grew wider at the feeling of your cunt being filled. He pulls right after plopping his slightly wet digits inside his mouth to lick it clean. He does all of that while staring shamelessly to your eyes.

The drive towards the restaurant was surprisingly short or he just really kept you occupied the whole ride. It was a fine dinning and thankfully, you dressed pretty appropriately for its aura.

The two of you entered while holding each others hands. Just by the entrance, you can see heads whips towards your direction probably intrigued to see the famous F1 racer out in the open once again. Not to mention that he’s being accompanied by someone unfamiliar to the public.

It made you conscious and a little bit anxious. The feeling of the vibrator inside you isn’t helping as well. Sunghoon did turn it off as you begged him to as you get off from the vehicle. He said that he will allow it only because you behaved and asked nicely.

“Reservation under my name.” Sunghoon tugs you closer to him, hand resting over your waist.

Sunghoon hates the attention he’s having the moment he step foot inside this place, but he thinks he hates the attention that you are gathering even more. More than once he caught a male looking at you like a hungry animal. He fucking hates it. How dare them look at you for more than five seconds? You are his to look at, to admire, to kiss, to claim and to fuck.

“This way, Sir.” the waiter smiles and guidee you inside.

The whole ambiance of the place was romantic and classy. The type of restaurants you see in movies where the people dressed extra nicely to fit the vibe of the place. It was just perfect, if only that thing was not making you feel uncomfy.

Sunghoon beats the waiter to pull a chair for you and you smiled at him. He kissed your hand before sitting at the chair across. He smirks while watching you trying to get comfortable on your seat.

“You good, baby?” he asks meaningfully as the waiter comes back for the menu, handing one each to the two of you.

“Y-Yeah,” and glared at him slightly before trying to look over the food they’re serving.

You’re just in the middle of trying to find something you like to eat when you jolt in surprise. Your eyes instantly darted at Sunghoon, glaring at him. He’s eyes are fixed on the menu while a big evil grin occupies his sexy lips.

He just turned the vibrator on, catching you off-guard and jolt on your seat. The waiter took notice of your sudden discomfort.

“Are you okay, Ma’am?” he asked, very worried.

You flash him a quick smile and pursed your lips tightly right after as the intensity gets higher.

“I’m fine— Ugh,” you groaned and lowered your head in embarrassment. You pressed your legs together, but it just became more intense that way.

“Are you sure? We can—”

“She said she’s fine.” Sunghoon’s strict tone interrups the waiter’s concerned remarks. You glanced at him and you can see him shooting glares at him.

You bit your lower lip and tried hard to control your body from shaking obviously. Its making your head fuzzy and the pleasure clouding your mind. Sunghoon clicks his tongue and proceeds on saying his order.

As he pressed the controlled on its max intensity, the satisfied grin spreads across his face seeing how you reacts. Just seeing how hard you try to control your expression and actions to not fully give into pleasure makes him slightly proud. He kind of wants you to make a mess tho, he’s not going to lie.

“I will order for her too. Is that all right, baby?” he even reaches for your hand that was resting by the table.

You nod your head eagerly, trying to focus on reaching yet another delicious orgasm. Right at this moment, you don’t care if the waiter notices how your legs are shaking or your face too flush from pleasure. All you can think of is to cum hard right there and then.

After the waiter gets your order, he excuses himself and informed you that your order will be ready after ten minutes. The moment he turns around to leave, your legs shakes reaching your climax.

Sunghoon smirks as he watch you slowly going back to your right mind space. With glares shooting straight at him you grit your teeth.

“Why w-would you do that?!”

He smirks, totally not regretful.

“I hate it when men flocks to impress you.”

You furrowed your brows hardly, still high from the orgasm you just had.

“He was just doing his job.”

He tilts his head, unimpressed. “Well I am just doing mine too.”

“What do you mean?”

“Marking what’s mine.” he said that seriously that it made you blush so hard.

Your heart thumped faster and harder that you almost got scared that it will come out from your ribcage. These are his actions that made you confuse if he have feelings for you or not. He’s not saying anything.

He asked something else afterwards to maybe ease the atmosphere. He’s still the Sunghoon who loves to tease you which somehow comforts you. Last time you’ve seen him, you asked him something personal and you got scared it made him cave in his shell once again.

Like what the waiter said, the food will be available after ten minutes. They served it and you two continued eating and talking. It was fun and you cannot believe you are having a date with Park Sunghoon.

You’re just worrying and overthinking about him last Wednesday night. You sure cannot predict what’s about to happen.

After your perfect meal, you’re trying to enjoy the dessert that he ordered for you when naughty Sunghoon once again tries to attack. Your head shakes side by side to stop him, but he was already grinning at you.

He pressed the controller making you jolt.

“H-Hoon,” you moaned.

“Yes, baby?” concern and teasing plays through his tone.

You pursed your lips. “Enough p-please.”

He pout his pinkish lips, “How can I stop when you look so good like that? Such a slut for me.” he says licking his lips while grinning widely.

The sensual look on your face and the way you fight it just so nobody notices turns him on. You’ve always been innocent in Sunghoon’s eyes. An angel. He’s like a very bad wolf trying to prey on you. To corrupt and make you his slut.

Sunghoon palms his dick as it slowly grow harder inside his trousers. He just couldn’t get enough of you.

“N-No...” you whimpered and lowered your head when he pressed it again to rise the intensity.

The pleasure is making you lose your mind. Sunghoon’s already lost his moments ago as he continue palming his erect friend down there.

“Just one more, baby. Cum for me one last time.” he says softly and you gulped.

The way he talks you through it is what’s dangerous. You can never say no to his sweet tone. It’s like it has its own way towards you that convinces and automatically hypnotize you to oblige to his words.

“B-But I c-can’t anymore.”

“Of course you can.” and he even reach for your hand to place a warm kiss on top of it.

He put it at max and you shut your eyes to prevent people from seeing how it rolled at the back of your head. Everything starts to be blurry and to spin.

“I-I’m close...” you mumbles, biting your lip hardly.

Sunghoon licks his lips, “That’s it...” he grabbed your hand and watch carefully while you surrendered yourself into pleasure.

“Hmph,” and another delicious orgasm unfolds.

“Let’s go,” Sunghoon stood up from his sit and approach you. He carefully helps you to stand up. Some customers looked at your direction, but you’re still too high from your previous climax to give care.

“Is she okay?” one waiter approaches after noticing that it seems like you are unwell.

“She’s fine. I just need to get her to the bathroom.” Sunghoon says and excused the both of you.

One waiter guides you two inside a bathroom. She asked if you needed anything more but Sunghoon dismissed her and told her that you just needed space to breath.

The moment she left, he went over the door and locked it. He pushed you over one of the counters, hold you by the hips and easily lifts you up. He made you sit down.

“W-What...” you licked your lips, unable to properly say anything.

He smirks, “You did so well for me, baby. So so good.” he mumbles and spreads your legs and placed a kiss at your forehead once.

His hand reaches for your core and carefully removes the vibrator inside.

“Ugh,” you moaned and groaned a bit at the feeling of that thing being removed from inside you.

Sunghoon take it to his lips and licked all of your juices out from it. It was so sweet, something he missed for days.

“Fuck, I need to have you. Right now.” he announced that made you flutter your eyes slightly open.

With the small gap, you saw him unzipping his pants that made your anticipation rise. Although totally worn out from the multiple orgasms he already gave you from that toy, the thought of having him for yourself excites you the most.

“P-Please.” you begged, gripping over his clothes.

“Please what, pretty?”

You lift your gaze and stared straight to his lustful eyes. It was dark and you can see how dangerous he is. The amount of lust he has for you was unmeasurable. Sunghoon never felt this way towards someone before.

“Please fuck me.”

Sunghoon’s eyes turned darker and dipped his head down to connect his hot lips on yours. He bit your lip to crack an entrance for his tongue to enter your delicious mouth. Your sweet taste overwhelms him and he started to get addicted.

He pressed his body towards you as he carefully pulls out his erect member. He strokes it a couple of times before placing it on your wet entrance. You whimper at the feeling of his hot dick grazing the line of your cunt.

It sent unexplainable pleasure that the two of you sure enjoys at the very moment. Something you two won’t get tired of.

“So fucking beautiful.” he mumbles on your lips and continues giving you messy kisses.

“So beautiful and only for me.” he growled as he slid his cock inside of you.

One hard thrust and he’s all in. Your eyes flutters open, mouth hanging open at the unexpected stretch. The vibrator and couple orgasms sure prepared you, but not enough to feel a slight sting. Sunghoon’s dick is so big for your small cunt.

“Fuck.” he cursed, feeling his dick suffocating inside of you.

“H-Hoon,” you whisper.

“I know baby. Hold on.” and he started to move, thrusting in and out of you. It was so good. The pleasure was too much.

He showed no mercy in using and abusing your pussy as he rutt his cock inside you so hard. He grunts and groaned at the pleasure of having your body this close. He glanced at your privates and just thought how they perfectly fit each other.

“You are mine. You hear me?” he grunts as he continued rocking harder. His thrusts became deeper and faster, fucking you into oblivion.

“Answer me!” he groaned and bit your shoulder when he received no response from you.

“Y-Yes.”

“Yes what?” he stared at you.

“Yes, I am yours.” you mumbled near his lips and he smiled widely before kissing you.

His hips started rutting even harder as both of your climax approaches. The two of you became a mess trying to catch that orgasm you’ve been yearning to have together. A couple of hard thrusts and dirty talking and you exploded first before him.

You throw your head back, eyes shut as you started to see stars fromtl too much pleasure. Sunghoon catches his breath and kissed your collarbones before slowly pulling out his member.

He watch how your mixed cum drips out from your hole. He smiles and use two of his fingers to push them back inside, making you jolt a little.

“Sorry, baby. I don’t want to waste it.”

The two of you tried to make yourself look much more presentable. You’ve been glaring at him through his reflection in the mirror in front of you and he’s been grinning all the time. He looked so hot and handsome, you hate it.

“You look so pretty.” he compliments.

Despite the blushing cheeks you rolled your eyes and twist to face him. You crossed your arms at him and stared. He smirks and put his hands inside his pockets.

“Don’t you think that was too much?” you fired him. He arched his brow, acting innocent about it.

“What do you mean?” he asks.

You clicked your tongue, “I bet they knew what was going on! Its so embarrassing.” you pout.

He chuckled and walks closer placing his large hands at your sides.

“I’m sure they don’t mind. Let’s go?”

“Where?” you looked at him with so much suspicion in your eyes.

“Why are you looking at me that way?”

“The last time you said that you led me here.”

He barked a laughter before kissing your cheeks once. He started guiding you out from that bathroom. Surprisingly, nobody took it as a big deal. Some of them looked genuinely worried of you, but once Sunghoon said that you’re just a little sick they let it go and wish you to feel well soon.

While he was paying for the your meals, you roamed your eyes around and by the entrance someone caught you attention. A familiar elegant girl walks inside with yet another familiar face.

They walked closer and when her eyes darted at your direction, it slightly grew.

“Sunghoon?” she calls softly.

Your head craned to look at Sunghoon and you saw how he stiffened. His hand halted from reaching over his black card he used to pay for their service.

He slowly turned to face the girl and the look on his face is not good. He jaw clenches as he looked at the two people standing a few feet away from you.

As you glance back at that girl, you realized she was the same girl you’ve seen at the elevator. The one who looked dreadful. The other one beside her is familiar as well. If you can remember it right, he’s one of Sunghoon’s team-mates.

“How have you been? I’ve been trying to call you, but they said you are refusing my calls.” she seemed agitated while Sunghoon remained his distant.

A little confused to what is happening, you took notice of his obvious discomfort by their presense. His body language is showing you that he doesn’t want to be here in front of them so you quickly stepped in.

“Hey, done paying?” you asked gently and grabbed his hand. It was cold, sweaty.

Their eyes then darted at your direction. The expression on that girl’s face drastically changed. Her eyes looked at you with so much judgement, raking it up and down.

Sunghoon finally took in a breath after feeling you beside him. He glances at you and seeing how you looked at him with so much care, calms him down. He nods and pursed his lips. You can still feel his hands shaking a little. He’s having a panic attack.

You faced them and smiled, “Hello, I’m y/n. I’m sorry, but Sunghoon and I have to go. I hope to see you guys around some other time.” and with that, you bowed politely before starting to guide him out.

Sunghoon manages to walk well, but you can still see that he’s in panic. When you arrived in front of his vehicle, his driver assisted you to get him inside. You asked him to give you two some space.

You cupped his face after giving him some water.

“Hey, calm down. Breath in,” you gently instructs and caress his arms. “breath out...”

He looked at your eyes and carefully follows them. He can feel his chest tightening for unknown reasons. His fist felt numb and her mind starts to lose focus. You, on the other hand understands that he’s having an anxiety. For what exact reason, you don’t know. But what you’re sure of is whoever those two are, they triggered something in him.

“Baby, I’m here. Just breath. I am here for you. Look at me.” you mumbles and held his hand to place it on your face.

He felt your warmth and his eyes slowly focused on you. He can now clearly see your beautiful face despite the slight darkness inside the vehicle. He felt his heart thumped faster, but this time in a different matter. You made him feel safe and calm.

“I’m s-sorry.” he whispers and your heart cracks at the sight of him.

It was almost like he’s not Sunghoon. He looked so fragile. A part of you felt relieved that he finally shown you this side of him, but your heart couldn’t take it.

You tugs him closer and he gave in. He wraps his arms around your waist and nuzzle closer, enjoying your warmth.

“She’s Natasha.” he mumbles.

Your brows furrowed and realized that he was probably referring to the girl from a while ago. You kept your mouth shut, doesn’t want to ask something that can ruin it again.

“My ex girlfriend.”

You guided Sunghoon inside his house once you two arrived. After he revealed that it was his ex-girlfriend from that restaurant, you don’t know what to feel. Just by thinking of how he reacted, it made you feel things. It made you overthink once again.

“Y/n...” you snapped back to reality when you heard him call you softly.

You craned your head and looked at him laying on his bed. He’s looking at you with slight worry and fear.

“Yes?”

“Please stay with me.”

He never, in the whole duration that you two had been in this set up, he had never asked you to stay. You felt your heart races, hope ignites inside your chest.

Slowly, you strut closer to his bed and he opens his blanket to then scooted away to give you enough space. When you lay down, he pulls you closer to cuddle you.

“Stay for tonight.” he begged.

You sighed and slid your arms over his waist after placing a kiss on his chest. “Okay.”

The two of you fell silent. You’re just caressing his back gently and you have no clue if he’s already asleep or what. All you can think of is how messed up it is to meet his ex girlfriend that way. You’re starting to overthink how he still feels for her or where you stand in his life at the moment.

“That night of the accident...” your hand halts from caressing his back and slowly you pulls away to look at him.

“You don’t have to if you aren’t ready yet.” you gave him an assuring smile.

He looked at you straight in your eyes and leans down to place a kiss on your forehead.

“I want to.” he says firmly.

You gave him a nod and rests your head on his chest once again. You gave him his time, doesn’t want to make him feel uncomfy and just take his precious time.

“On the night before I got into an accident, I planned to go to her place because I felt like I neglected her too much. I was having practice on consecutive days since the competition is near.” he says.

He took a long breath and tries to calm himself to go through the night he got into an accident once again.

“I went to her place and found her...” he gulps. You placed a kiss on his chest and caress his back gently. “I found her naked on top of my best friend.” he finally said it.

Your mouth gapped and slowly pulls away from hugging him. His breathing fasten and you raised your head to look at his eyes. It was brimming with tears and you felt like your heart teared off.

“I j-just can’t believe it. How can they do that to me? My girlfriend and my own best friend? That’s so fucked up.” a tear escapes his eyes as he clenched his jaw harder, trying to compose himself.

You cup his face and listened to him carefully.

“I stormed out from her apartment after cursing them out. I drove while still being so angry. The next thing I know, I was in the hospital.”

He pursed his lips together and stared at your eyes. Sunghoon didn’t hold back, he lets you see his vulnerability. He doesn’t know but if there’s someone he can show this side of him, he knew it was you.

“I refused to drive again because I feel like it was the start of how things got messy between all of us. She said I neglected her and all I can think of is that race. My best friend said I took away all the spotlight and left him out of it. He was pushed out of the picture and I am the only one people can see.” he stated, he looked so broken and betrayed.

You may not know a lot about these people, but what you heard from him was enough for you to feel a slight hatred towards them.

“Hey, listen to me.” you sniffed, tears pooling your eyes.

Your hands cupped his face and his hands slowly rested over your hips. His eyes stared at you, trying to listen like you said.

“The issue with your ex girlfriend, it was not right for her to make neglection as a reason to cheat on you. Yes, you might have your short comings as her boyfriend but I am pretty sure you two can solve that problem together by talking.” you carefully make him understand. He stays silent, hand slowly caressing your waist up and down.

“Your best friend,” you started and the picture of the two of them you saw from the internet months ago flashes back to your mind. They look so happy in that photo and yet who knew this could happen?

“You can never cure insecurity, baby. Even if you try to give him the time to shine, you can never fix his own issues for him. If he cannot be supportive of you, then he doesn’t deserve you.” you rest your forehead over his.

“Don’t blame yourself for something you don’t have control of. Even if you don’t neglect her, what assurance do you have that she will not do that to you? If its meant to happen, it will happen. Just like racing.” you smile gently at him, tears streaming down your pretty face.

Sunghoon raises one of his hand to wipe off those tears and kiss you once on the cheek.

“Racing and you are meant to be together. You shine differently behind those wheels and you love racing. Don’t let these people take away your dream.” and you sincerely told him.

Something tugs inside Sunghoon’s heart as he leans in to give you a slow heated kiss on the lips. That night, he couldn’t be more thankful that he have you beside him. You spent the whole time cuddling and enjoying each other’s warmth.

The next day, you left after giving him smooches. He refused on letting you go, but you told him you have an importang meeting for that day. He was a little sulky so you had to give him a head to boost his mood a little.

He walked you out and waves cutely, the firm disapproval of you leaving flashes across his handsome face. His bed hair and slightly crinkled white shirt just gave more vibe to you, making your stomach churns and wetting you down there.

Sunday came as well, Hana went back and you decided to spend it with her. Sunghoon kept on texting you. Thankfully he wasn’t that sulky about it.

“Doctor, that was your last patient.” your secretary announced after she knocks and opens the door to your office.

You smiled and told her she did well today. It’s monday already and you’re off to go see Sunghoon at his place for his session.

Speaking of which, your smile grew after seeing his caller i.d flashing through your phone.

“Yeah?”

“You’re at your office?” he asks.

“Uh-huh. Why? I’ll just fix my things and I’ll go straight to your place.” you informed him.

You can hear some muffled background sounds from the other line, like he’s walking or something.

“Nah, stay there. I’m almost at your floor.”

“Huh? What are you doing here?” you asked, confused.

“Picking you up. See you in a bit, baby.” and he ended the call.

You couldn’t help but to smile widely just by thinking he came here to fetch you. Not long after, a knock can be heard from your office door. With excited hops you went to open it for him. A big grin is what greets you.

“Baby!” you greeted cheerfully and threw yourself at him. It made Sunghoon giggle and press kisses on your lips right away.

One of his hand rests over your waist, the other one holding something. After being satisfied of the affections you shared with each other, you pulled away and stared at him.

“You didn’t have to come and pick me up, you know?” but the smile on your lips almost rips face.

“We’ll go out on dinner.” he says that made your brows arched. You’re about to say something when he beats you into talking.

“With my parents.” he added that made your face turn pale instantly.

You’ve seen Mrs. Park a couple of times throughout the process of your sessions with Sunghoon. She is nice, except that you still find her a little intimidating. His father tho, despite showing his trust on you that day they seek for your professional help, he intimidates everything in you.

“You okay, baby?” and he pulls you closer to him.

“I’m nervous. Why are we suddenly having dinner with them?” you asked a little warry.

He smiles and kissed your cheeks, finding you adorable like this. He placed the paperbag he’s been holding ever since he arrived. Your eyes darted at it with slight curiosity.

“You can wear this dress for tonight.”

While staring at his expressive eyes, you realized you’ve got no choice but to go with him. Thankfully, he did gave you enough time to get ready and make yourself look more presentable. You have no idea what’s the dinner for since Sunghoon didn’t quite made it clear.

After an hour or two, he guided you towards the elevator. His coat rests on your shoulder to keep you warm while you go down to where he parked.

“Where is your driver?” you asks, roaming your eyes around to search for his familiar range rover.

Instead, he guides you over into a red sports car. With hopeful eyes, you glanced silently at him. He smirks and opened the passenger seat to the two-seater vehicle.

“I’ll be driving us tonight, pretty.” he finally confirms and you couldn’t explain how happy you are at that moment.

He leans and kissed your shoulder before helping you to get inside. You took the time admiring the inside of his car. It was very beautiful. The kind of car you think that fits Sunghoon, the famous F1 racer. His range rover is not bad, but this one fits him even more.

“What?” he scoffed while starting the engine when he noticed how your stares lingers.

“Have I told you how sexy you are?”

He chuckled and smirked widely.

“Well, this sexy man will eat you later tonight.”

You blushed and quickly swat his arm quickly. “You always find a way to ruin the moment with your horniness.”

He laughed and leans to kiss you on your cheeks swiftly, “What can I say? I just couldn’t get enough of you.”

The ride was short and you can feel your whole system panicking the moment he handed his keys to the vallet. He offered his hand and you accepted it as he guided you inside. Just days ago, you were inside a fine diningr restaurant and now you are here once again. What’s even more thrilling is that his parents will join you.

The waiters greets you with full enthusiasm and helped you find your table. They informed the two of you that his parents were already there.

“Doctor (Surname).” his Mom flashes you a big smile the moment she sets eyes on you.

Compared to the last time you met them, their aura seems to be lighter. His Dad looked a little more friendlier. A small smile plays through his lips as he silently watch you two approach the table.

You bowed politely and accepted the sudden hug from his mother. She’s always nice, but never to this extent. It caught you off-guard.

Sunghoon pulls the chair for you and waits for you to have a seat before taking his.

“We already ordered our food! I hope you don’t mind, Doctor (surname).” she says with so much elegance.

You smiled, “Not at all. Apologies for being a little late.”

“Oh, no need! I mean we did arranged this dinner so suddenly.” she giggles.

You have no idea what she thinks about you and where you stand in her son’s life so you feel a little awkward. Despite the large leap between your relationship with Sunghoon, he didn’t confirmed anything yet.

You felt his arm resting at the rest of your chair. It caught his father’s eyes so you felt conscious and made sure not to lean back. His Mother was the one who carries the whole conversation. She seems excited and so you make sure you respond well to her.

“So Doctor (Surname)—”

“Y/n, Mom. Call her by her first name. You’re too formal.” Sunghoon interrupts her while the waiters starts to serve the food.

“Is it okay with you, dear?” she asks.

You eagerly nodded your head as you find it a little awkward to be called by your surname all the time.

“Please enjoy the meal, y/n.” Sunghoon’s father said that made you glance at his direction. You nodded and all of you started eating.

Sunghoon kept looking after you that even while his father and him discusses about something, he keeps on assisting you. You blush, feeling a little shy that his mother will soon take notice and ask what’s between the two of you.

“You’re probably wondering why we suddenly asked to have dinner with you.” she started after you finished the main meals and now at your desserts.

You nodded and patiently wait for what she’s about to say. She pursed her lips and you can see her eyes softening, slightly brimming with tears.

She reaches for your hand and the two male kept silent, watching the two of you. Sunghoon’s hands moves and rests at the small of your back, giving it subtle caress.

“We want to thank you for looking out for Sunghoon and for helping him. We really did the right choice of asking for your help.” she sincerely said.

You smiled, “It was my pleasure.”

She smiles, “When he told us that he wants to undergo surgery and to drive for (f1 team) once again we were so happy. We couldn’t thank you enough!”

Your mouth gapped at what you just heard. The shock on your face was too evident that his Mom looked at you with amusement.

“W-What?” you asked, totally confused.

“Wait, he didn’t told you?” his Mom asks.

You shook your head side to side and heard Sunghoon heaving a sigh from beside you. He pushed himself from resting at his chair.

“It was suppose to be a surprise for her, Mom.” he says that made you look at him with teary eyes.

“Surprise.” he smirks.

“Are you really...?”

He nods his head, staring at you with an unknown look on his face. His affection for you oozing that even his parents noticed it right away. They didn’t need to ask or for their son to confirm it. From just how he holds you and looks at you, they can tell that he’s very fond of you.

“I’m so happy for you!” and you caged him with a tight embrace.

The dinner continued with a lighter atmosphere. You shared conversation with his Mom as she starts telling you stories about his childhood which you find really entertaining.

“Thank you for tonight.” you smiled widely at his Mother when its time to bid goodbye.

She pursed her lips and approaches for yet another warm hug. “Thank you for coming into our son’s life, y/n.” she whispers only for you to hear.

Your heart thumps and was unable to say anything else after she pulls away to give her son a hug this time. They waved and Sunghoon guides you towards his sports car.

“She likes you so much.” he says after putting his seatbelt on.

“Well your Mom is a sweetheart.”

He smiled agreeing. He started the engine and drove. You noticed that he its not the direction back to the hospital so you glanced at him.

“You aren’t taking me back to the hospital?”

He glanced at you, “Why? You left something?”

“My car is there.”

He kept his eyes at the road, “You’re going home with me tonight. You don’t need your car.”

You pursed your lips into a pout, “But I have work tomorrow.”

“We can ask someone to buy you work clothes and I can drive you to the hospital tomorrow since I also need to see the surgeon my Mom was talking about.”

Your eyes grew out of excitement.

“Okay, I can accompany you before I go to work.”

So it was final. The two of you made it to his place and decided to cuddle. Legs tangled with each other, your head laying over his chest as he hugs you close to his body. Sunghoon couldn’t ask for anything else. Just by having you like this while your hearts beats in sync with each other was enough.

The two of you spent the whole night just enjoying the warmth and comfort that escalates between you. It was a wholesome moment that probably will be cherished for as long as you can remember.

“Fucking fuck!” Sunghoon’s rasp voice moaned as he continued rutting deep and hard from behind you.

It was morning the next day and nothing’s better to start your day with a morning fuck. So here you are on your second orgasm for today, face pressed down on the pillow while he take you deliciously from behind. You can feel his length reaching all the right spot perfectly.

“H-Hoon, just like that!” you screamed.

“Pussy so tight for me. So good, so fucking good.” he leaned and bite on your skin before rocking even harder.

When you’re about to reach your climax, Sunghoon flips you around so you can face him. “I want to see your beautiful face while I cum deep inside you.” he groaned and once again find his pace.

You two were a moaning mess, desperately getting drowned by too much pleasures.

“P-Please, I'm cumming.” you mumbled, tears swells over your eyes.

He groped your chest and continued fucking you hard. Sunghoon licks his lips as he make sure he is hitting it deep and right. The amount of pleasure your pussy is giving him is out of this world. For him, nothing can match this. You are the only one.

“Cum with me, baby.” he demands that you completely obliges as eyes rolls back hardly after your release.

After a couple of thrust, Sunghoon shoots his hot seeds deep inside your womb, making sure he paints and claims you enough. He leans in while still giving you lazy thrusts and kissed you on your lips.

He plops beside you and you’re both trying to catch your breaths.

“We need to get ready.” you announced and sat up. His eyes follows you silently.

“Can’t we just go tomorrow instead?”

You shook your head in disapproval. “No. We have to do your sessions tomorrow so we have no time. Besides, you have to meet with your surgeon.”

After so many attempts of making him leave the bed and get ready, you finally succeeded. He drove you to the hospital.

“We’ll go to your surgeon first.” you left him with no choice.

Sunghoon silently follows, ignoring the eyes that obviously watches him after recognizing who he is. His tall figure, handsome face and the way he carries himself just catches attention easily.

“Excuse me, is doctor Kang available at the moment?” you ask the attendant nurse.

Her eyes lits up at the sight of you and smiles. “Yes, doctor.” she response.

“Great! May I ask what time is his appointment with Park Sunghoon?”

The nurses eyes brightens, “Mr. Park Sunghoon? Oh, Doctor Kang has been waiting for him for twenty minutes. His Mom already made the appointment last night.”

You smiled excitedly, “Thank you! I’m sorry for being late, we were caught on traffic. Can we go inside now?”

She nods and just informs Doctor Kang that his patient just arrived. You walked towards Sunghoon who have a placid expression on his face.

“Let’s go. I will walk you inside and I’ll go.”

“You’ll leave me there?” he asked with a tone of betrayal.

“I have work to do.”

“But I need you there.”

You sighed, “I’ll just meet with my client and then I will come back here. Okay?”

He still looked unsatisfied, but you pulled him towards the office of his surgeon. When you entered, his head lifts and eyes widen in surprise to see you. It didn’t slip from Sunghoon. The delightful look on his face the moment he saw you walking inside stirs something inside him.

He walks near you, back pressing on your back.

“Doctor (surname), what a surprise.” he greets and stood up from his table.

“Oh, I just accompanied Sunghoon here.” and now his eyes darted at his direction.

The doctor seem to be surprised again and quickly offered a hand. Didn’t want to be rude, Sunghoon tries to keep his cool and accepted it.

“Its such an honor to finally meet you, Mr. Park.” he says.

He gave him a short nod, looking a little snobby. Your lips lifts a bit, remembering how he’s just the same the first time you two had met.

“How’d you know him?” he curiously asked you.

You smiled, “I’m his psychiatrist,”

“And my girlfriend.” Sunghoon added that caught you off-guard, resting his hand over your waist.

The smile on his surgeon’s face fell, but he tries hard to pull it back.

“Oh, I s-see.” he awkwardly stated.

You blinked and with blushing cheeks, you realized it was your cue to leave them two alone.

“I’ll see you l-later?” you stuttered.

Sunghoon seemed unbothered and even pleaced a peck on your lips before finally letting you go. The whole time you’re walking towards your building, your mind was occupied. You cannot think of anything else but what Sunghoon just said.

Girlfriend? Did he really just said you are his girlfriend? Your stomach churns and heart hammered hardly inside your chest.

It took everything in you to shove that thought off of your mind in order to focus on your work. Your sessions went surprisingly well regardless of being a little distracted because of the F1 racer.

After your last session, you heard a knock from your door and Sunghoon went inside. You smiled while still writing something at your folder.

“So...” you started and tilts your head at him.

“Since when did I became your girlfriend?” your tone sounds teasing. He smirks and leans in to drop a peck on your lips.

“Since I asked you out on a date.”

You furrowed your brows, “The day we met after not seeing each other for days?” you tried confirming it to him.

He nodded his head innocently.

“I thought you already knew that we’re already dating since I asked you out.”

You blushed, “Do you even like me?”

He narrowed down his brows and stared right at your face. “No.” his quick answer shoots you straight to the chest. It was painful.

He grabs your hand and gently guides you to stand up only to tug you closer to him. He wraps his arms around your body.

“I love you.” the three words came out from him naturally that you’re completely dumbfounded.

You blinked, “A-Are you serious?”

Sunghoon chuckled, finding you adorable.

“I am crazy for you, y/n. In case you failed to notice.”

You smiled and tip-toed for a kiss on his lips. “I love you too.”

His cheeks perks up in so much satisfaction after hearing you utter those three words. You never knew that you two will end up in this situation. You were just overthinking about this and now it was settled. There’s nothing more you can ask and just enjoys being warmly wrapped between your boyfriend’s warmth.

Almost two months had passed and you cannot be happier. It was well spent with Sunghoon as you two grew in love with each other. He was badly smitten over you as much as you are to him.

His surgery went well too and he’s now on his therapies for him to get back in the right shape. The doctor said once he's over with all of this, he’s good as new like before. He can go back on track and win races again.

“Come in!” your cheerful voice echoes inside your office after you heard a knock from your office door.

You’re done with your session today and just getting ready to leave. Sunghoon’s not responding from your text an hour ago so you assumed you won’t be meeting him again today. He’s been really busy with his therapies lately and you completely understand.

Right now, your top priority is for him to get better and nothing else.

“Miss me?”

Your hand halts from putting your things inside your bag. Shivers ran through your spine and cold sweats all over you. The familiar horrifying voice you almost forgot about rings inside your head, instantly triggering that traumatic experience you had.

Slowly, you turned around to face the person standing right by the door. The smile on his face terrified you.

“M-Mr. Cha.” you stuttered while looking at him with nothing but fear on your eyes.

“Nice to see you too, y/n.” he trailed his gaze from your face down to your body. And when you saw how he licked his lips as he does that disgusts the hell out of you.

“I see you’ve been prettier while I was gone.” he walks closer and you couldn’t even move a muscle. You are pierced right at your position, unable to even say anything.

You wanted to run as fast as you can, but your stupid feet just could not move. Like it was glued or something.

“How have you been?” his hand raised to touch your face and you moved away. He doesn’t seem to like what you did so he grabbed your hair.

“Being feisty, eh?” the sarcasm looms over his tone as he pulled your head backwards, he took his time admiring your beautiful face up close.

The director can’t remember the very first time he ever started to feel the attraction towards you. Maybe it was when his father introduced you to him as the newly hired psychologist for the hospital. He still remember how bragged that you’re one of the top students in your university and the hospital managed to pull you.

He couldn’t help but to agree. It was indeed a lucky thing they managed to have you.

“P-Please don’t do this...” your tears rolled down your cheeks and lips shakes in so much fear.

Just by thinking of going through the same process like before terrified you. But who you are kidding? You didn’t even know why you bother to plead when you knew very well he wouldn’t listen.

Mr. Cha smirks and started peppering you with kisses. You grunts and cried in resistance, but he’s just more powerul than you.

As tears silently rolled down your face while this man was assaulting you, Sunghoon flashes through you mind. How you wished he can be here to protect you and prevent this thing to happen. You should’ve had said to him what happened before.

That’s the thing. No matter how many times you try, you can’t. Fear and embarrassment takes over whenever you try to tell him about that day. You know he would understand, its just your own fear is hunting you.

On the other hand, Sunghoon’s all smiley while he parks his car at the underground parking lot of the hospital. He’s just in time to pick you up from your shift.

He felt bad that therapies had been taking all of his time and he couldn’t spend more time with his lovely girlfriend. Tomorrow, he’s off to leave the country for a week of seminar and therapy. It would be the last one before the doctors allowed him to go on full training.

He figures he can go see and spend the night with you before he leaves for a few days. He will miss you the most.

As the elevator tings at your floor, he steps outside and saw that the table of your secretary was vacant. Seems like she left already. He’s pretty sure you are still here since he didn’t receive any messages that you left your office.

When he stepped closer, he can hear muffled sound coming from inside. Things being moved and some grunts. He slowly pushed the door open and the flower he was holding fell to the cold floor.

His whole body felt numb and his ears ringed at the sight in front of him. He can feel his whole body feeling cold, mind going blank.

“What the fuck...” he said that made the man holding you moved away.

Your teary eyes grew and you quickly fixed yourself as Mr. Cha managed to push your skirt up until your waist. You still have your underwear on, but the scene itself was sensual enough for Sunghoon to react this way.

“H-Hoon...” you called softly and tried to stand up properly.

When he looked at you with the hint of betrayal flickering through his eyes, your heart drops. He misunderstood everything. He clenched his jaw and took a step backwards, shaking his head from side to side.

“N-No! It isn’t what you t-think—”

You squealed when he step forward and took a hold of Mr. Cha’s collar. With dark and dangerous eyes he glares right at him. He threw a punch with no hesitation.

“Fuck you!” he shouted.

You quickly went to stop him before he unwillingly damage his shoulder again. Thankfully, he did let you but your heart broke when he shoved your hold off from him. He glanced at you with cold eyes and left the room.

You got stoned in your position for a while before finally composing yourself. Without much thought inside your head, you grabbed your jacket and phone to come after Sunghoon. He was no longer in the elevator and so you headed down the parking lot hoping you can catch up on him.

“Sunghoon!” you called out and scurry over to his sports car. Surprisingly, nobody was there.

A part of you felt relieved that he didn’t go and drove away using his car while he’s feeling that way. You’re still very worried. You fished your phone from your pocket and dialled one of his friend’s number.

“Y/n?” his surprised tone greets you after answering your call.

“Jake! Is Sunghoon with you?”

“Huh? He just left to go see you. Is he not there yet?”

You bit your lower lip and another set of tears attempts to stream down your face. Just being reminded of how horrible and hurt he looked moments ago hunts you.

“W-We had a fight. Can you please call him? Please? I’m scared that he’ll get into another accident.”

You heard background noises from the other line and follows, “All right. Jay and I will look around for him. Don’t worry too much and be safe.” he says that send instant relief.

“Thank you.” and you crash down the pavement near his parked car.

It’s unbelievable how these things are happening to you right now. As far as you remember, you’ve never did anyone wrongly to the point for you to suffer this way. Nobody deserves to be assaulted and silenced that way. But you are scared. To think that you shouldn’t be the one to feel ashamed but still do is depressing.

As expected, he refused to see you. His friends did confirmed that they had found him somewhere and safely took him to his house. It was enough for you. The last thing you’d want is for him to get into trouble because of you.

You headed home as well, praying so bad that everything will be fine soon. You’ve been so happy with Sunghoon lately that you lost track of time. The director is back after being out of the country for a while. You’re a bit dumb to think that he will stop once he sees you’re already dating somebody.

The next day, you’re about to head over to Sunghoon’s house but to your dismay he’s off to do his last therapy. It slipped off your mind as well. Now, it made you feel bad even more. He might have went there to come see you since he will leave for a few days.

You planned to come after him, but it may be not the best choice. His mind is probably occupied and he needs time to collect his own thoughts. The best thing you can do right now is resign from your job and wait for him to come back. You can afford losing that big opportunity, but not Sunghoon. Not him.

On the other hand, Sunghoon’s on his second day out of the country. He still out of it. He’s body is here, but his mind is clearly left back at you. His heart too. He can still feel his chest tightening whenever he recalls how he sees another man touching and kissing you that way.

“That seminar is so boring!” his head craned over to one of his friend as he settles down beside him. He placed his food on the table and glanced at Sunghoon once.

“You’re too quiet these days, hyung. You missed Y/n noona that much?” he teased and even nudge him over the shoulder.

He ignored what he said and remained silent. He was right. Even after what he saw, he can’t deny that he’s been missing you so much.

“But you know Cha Jin? The director of that hospital she's working on?” he stated that made Sunghoon stops from fidgeting over his fingers.

Just by merely hearing that guy’s name sets fire inside him. It boils his blood that he wants to go straight to where he is and punch him nonstop until he passed out.

His friend seemed to not notice how his expression changed and just continued talking about this director.

“He used to be my cousin’s batchmate and he said that guy harassed a lot of girls before! He even mentioned if it wasn’t for his family’s money and power, he would have been already in jail.”

Sunghoon stunned at what he just heard. He suddenly got reminded of how he caught you and that guy that day. Him pressing himself over you while your eyes brim with tears.

Your eyes....

He cursed inwardly for not noticing it right away and for letting his emotions take over him completely.

He abruptly stood up from his seat that surprised even his friend. He looked at Sunghoon with confused eyes.

“Hyung?”

“I’ll go first.” he says and started pressing something over his phone.

“G-Go where? Hyung!” he slightly panic at the sight of the older one gathering some important things.

“Home. Tell Mr. Lim I left because of an emergency.”

Sunghoon didn't even let his friend to say anything else and just proceed on leaving that place. He put his phone over his ears and wait for the other person to answer the call.

“Yes, Mr. Park?”

“I want to file a case.” he says seriously, fist hardly clenched while talking to his lawyer.

He wants so bad to ruin Mr. Cha for doing that and he wants to punch himself for being too dumb to notice. Sunghoon asked for an immediate flight back home and tried to organize everything that will be needed.

The next day, you went over your office to gather some things. Honestly, you have no enough courage to go there. You knew you couldn't stand being in that room for long right after what he just did to you.

You hate it because you’ve put so much work and effort just for that place to feel cozy and safe. He just ruined all of it. He’s disgusting and a monster.

Just as you’re hurrying to put all the stuff you can fit inside the small box you brought, your door bursts open.

“Leaving without saying good bye?”

You whipped your head to face him with piercing eyes. Seeing him flashing a smile and having the face to be here after doing all of that to you is unbelievable. He has no shame at all.

“I’m quitting my job.”

He scoffed, “Really?” he laughed with no humor. He still scares you, but you need to be brave. You have to.

“Do you think another hospital will accept you if I spread rumor about you?” he slid his hand inside his pocket and tilts his head with a cocky smile.

You clenched your jaw and stared at him with so much hatred. He is powerful and wealthy. You knew he can ruin your life in a snap, mainly why you’re also too afraid to leave this place.

“You can’t do anything about it, y/n.” he smirks wickedly.

A tear fell from your eyes then it moves over to look at the unfamiliar person who suddenly walks inside. Your brows furrowed in confusion and so does Mr. Cha.

“But I can.” Sunghoon’s familiar voice made you roam your eyes around and you almost lost your balance when you saw him walking inside.

“What...” Mr. Cha is as confused as you are.

“Mr. Cha Jin we are asking you to come with us for interrogation about a case of harassment and rape.” a guy held him by his shoulder firmly and the other put his wrists together.

Sunghoon walks towards you and cupped your face, making you burst into tears even more.

“I’m sorry for being late, baby.” he mumbles and you just shook your head side to side.

“You’re just in time.”

He smiles and leaned down to give you a sweet kiss on your lips. He pulled away and both of you looked over Mr. Cha as he kept on resisting from the people whose guiding him outside.

“You can’t do this! You have no enough proof!” he said enraged and his eyes darted at your direction.

“Tell them, y/n! Tell them I am innocent! Do something! Defend your director!”

You can’t believe how he can say all those words towards you when he knew very well how guilty he is. Sunghoon tugs you closer, trapping your body using one of his arm.

He throw an envelope near Mr. Cha and his eyes dropped down to look at it.

“That’s her resignation letter.” Sunghoon said seriously.

Mr. Cha doesn’t look so happy about it and with gritted teeth he looked at the two of you.

“You can’t do this! You know what I can do to you, y/n!” he kept threatening you.

Sunghoon scoffed and tilts his head before placing a kiss on your forehead while still eyeing Mr. Cha. No fear can be seen over your boyfriend’s eyes.

“You messed with the wrong girl.”

He signalled the authorities to take him away already and you nuzzle over his chest as the commotion unfold. You have nothing in mind, but the thought of things being over.

“Wait.” you said when it finally hits you.

“Are you done with your therapy?” you looked at him with worried eyes.

Sunghoon smiled a little, “Not yet.”

“Then why are you here? You should be—” your words got cut off when he leans in and drop a kiss at your lips.

“I am here because my girlfriend needs me. I am a fool to leave you here alone that day.” guilt flashes through his eyes and you’re quick to comfort him.

“Don’t say that. The important thing is that you are here now.” and you wrapped your arms around his waist for a tight hug.

You two stayed that way before you decided to go home.

“Wait.” Sunghoon says and tugs your arm to pull you back.

Your body crashes on his and he looked at you with those hot eyes. With a little suspicion you stared at him.

“W-What?”

He smirked as one of his hand slowly moves down your thighs. You blushed and roamed your eyes around to check if somebody is there.

“Let me fuck you here in your office one last time.” he whispered sexily as he swiftly switch your positions and pushed you over your office table.

“But what if someone sees us?”

He pushed your skirt up to reveal your underwear. Sunghoon curses at how hot you looked beneath him before he licked his lip.

“Then they will enjoy the show.” and with a big grin, he pushed your undies to the side then pulled out his erect cock.

He gave his palm a lick before aligning his hardened head on your wet core. You let out a small moan at the sensation of his dick touching your entrance.

“Nobody,” he grunts as he pushed it inside with no mercy making you yelped a little. “can every taste you this way. This is all mine. Mine.” he said firmly like a law nobody can disobey.

He started thrusting from behind you and you two are both a moaning mess. He made his hand roam your sexy back before reaching your hand to intertwin your fingers.

“I love you so much, baby.”

Your mouth hanged open, saliva dripping slightly out from it from too much pleasure as your boyfriend kept hitting the right spots.

“I l-love you, Hoon.”

“You look lovely.” he doesn’t even need to utter those words towards you as his eyes are enough for you to know it.

The way Sunghoon stares at you with so much love and affection will always be your favorite thing. His thick brows making a straight line whenever he looks at you indicates how his worries disappears. His sexy eyes never leaving you and his lips lifting for a smile shows how badly smitten he is for you.

You smiled and leaned closer for one kiss as you don’t want your gloss to be smeared all over him if it was a long kiss. He tried to chaste after, not satisfied with the short affection. You’re quick to dismiss his attempt for another kiss.

“Later.”

“Later?”

You giggled, “Yes, later.”

He nods and placed a kiss at your shoulder before the two of you walks inside the venue. Tonight, his team gathered everyone for a small dinner party to welcome him back. His other team-mates and his coach are pretty much excited to have him back.

Of course, he asked you to be there. He wants you to be there for him.

“There he is! My man!” their coach cheers and eagerly approached Sunghoon as you two made an entrance.

His teammates didn’t waste time to come and greet him as well, delighted to see him around. You didn’t fail to catch their attention too as they kept eyeing you after greeting Hoon.

Your eyes catch a glimpse of his ex-girlfriend with Sunghoon’s ex best friend. They both stood from a distance unlike everybody else. She looked a little sad and whole regretful as she stare at your direction.

She couldn’t help but reminisce the times that it was her who he was holding.

“This is Doctor y/n (surname), my girlfriend.” he announced sounding so proud.

They all looked amused and even bickered around who can shake your hand first. You giggled finding it adorable and funny.

“You two look good together.” your heads whipped over to the side when two people approaches.

The taunting lingers over his tone as he smirks over Sunghoon, eyes flickering slight anger and disapproval to your boyfriend’s presence. Natasha stood close to him, her body language shows how uncomfy she is and how she refused to be in that situation.

A part of you felt bad for her, but you also know she kind of deserves it after what she did to Sunghoon.

Sunghoon didn’t show any sign of annoyance through his face, but instead pulled you closer to his side.

“Thanks. I can say the same thing to the two of you.” Sunghoon said with a playful smirk on his face as he stated those words with a meaningful tone.

Natasha looked so bothered about it and so does his best friend. He tries to hide it with a humorless laugh and clicked the side of his cheeks.

“Don’t you feel sorry for suddenly showing up like nothing happened?” he fired that made Sunghoon's smile fell.

His smirk grew wider at the reaction Sunghoon showed. He seems to be enjoying it and you hate it. So even before he can utter another word, you stepped in.

“Yes, my boyfriend does feel sorry.” you interrupted with a sweet voice and a playful expression on your face.

Everyone eyed you as you looked straight at his ex best friend’s face.

“The only thing he felt sorry about is that he left the team on your care.” you said that earned reactions from their teammates.

You pursed your lips into a pout, like you feel sorry. Like you feel so much pity.

“You didn’t even made it to the top five, right? What a shame.” you teased that clearly hit the spot as his smirk fell completely.

Sunghoon grinned and licked his lip before tilting his head over to the side, very impressed.

“But don’t worry guys. Sunghoon’s back to win you another trophy this season. I know he won’t disappoint us.” and you flash them all a very sweet smile.

And he really didn’t disappoint.

“For first place, champion for this season.” the announcer voice echoes to the whole place while you looked above during the podium ceremony.

Your eyes goes teary just watching Sunghoon smiling so widely while looking straight at you. His mother held your arm beside and got her widest smiles as well.

“Park Sunghoon!” everyone cheered so loudly after his name was called.

You screamed and clapped, admiring how he really shines. This is where he truly belongs, his natural habitat. He is meant for this. You pursed your lips, trying to hold back your tears.

He kissed the trophy while still looking straight to you. He mouthed ‘I love you’ and you responded, ‘I love you.’

Your heart races as the crowd cheers loudly for Park Sunghoon, the famouse ace racer of the team (f1 team) and also your boyfriend.

tag-list:

@candewlsy @nyfwyeonjun @sunghoonizz @jaehyuniewifeu @imjakes-wifeofc1 @deobitifull @enhypens-hoe @yzzyhee @nyxtwixx @crimnalseung @vixensss @jjklvr9 @gonorrheaisme @lhspeachie @myboyfriendjungkook @capri-cuntz @brooklyninawhitemustang @woniebae @ma-riiii @tinie03 @seokseokjinkim @iheartjayke @hybeboyenthusisast @minniejenseo @shelovsme @sjakewrld @shawnyle @skzenhalove @crimnalseung @cloud-lyy @vixialuvs @mitmit01 @mintdsunoo @metkayinassss @dojaejunging @ahnneyong @denleave1088 @velvetkisscs @saanvilovessunghoon @ilymarkchan @realrintaro @acolytees @tanisha2060 @stuckonclouds @outroherrr @yunhoswrldddd @smpfrpshlhs @missychief1404 @riyuukii @jungwonieee

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

He's My Man (Part 3)

Summary: Russell's returned and it appears that the reader's past employment problems are behind her. But when a shirtless Russell invites her into his home and their flirting rises to new levels, the reader will have to grapple with a new reality she doesn't know how to deal with. Russell Shaw might just be the first good guy after all...

Masterlist

Pairing: Russell Shaw x reader

Word Count: 3,500ish

Warnings: language, gun shot injury mention, smidge of angst, fluff

A/N: That ending though 👀

__________

The sun was shining high when you woke, streams of light filtering in through the large windows. You hummed as you sat up, Colter typing away at his laptop outside. There was no sign of Russell though, a frown forming on your face.

He hadn’t left already, had he? He’d promised to tell you what happened back home.

You quickly changed in Colter’s bedroom into your joggers and AC/DC shirt, deciding to try Russell’s gifts out. The bra felt amazing, especially after wearing the same dirty one for a few days in a row. Even the lilac underwear was softer than you expected. 

Outside you shrugged on one of Russell’s flannel’s, pouting when you saw his car was gone and yours was in it’s place.

“Morning,” said Colter, nodding towards where a cup of coffee laid waiting for you next to your chair.

“Hey,” you said, taking it without sitting. “I didn’t mean to sleep so late.”

“Not a problem. You haven’t been getting much lately.” You glanced around and noticed he was packed up for the most part, probably itching to get on the road. 

“You have a new case?” 

“Yeah. Oregon, not too far,” he said. He reached into his pocket, holding out your car keys. You wearily took them, Colter glancing over the top of your head. “I told him to stick around but he wanted to make sure it was ready for you.”

You raised an eyebrow, Colter shrugging.

“Apparently Russell has a place 45 minutes from here. Some cabin on a lake? I didn’t know he had a house. But uh, he hasn’t been there in awhile and he went on ahead to clean and stock up or something. He wants you to head up there so you can talk.”

“Oh. That’s…sweet.” You chugged back half your coffee, Colter eyeing you suspiciously. “What?”

“Nothing. Go have your talk.” You hummed, taking another sip. “You don’t owe him anything you know.”

“I know. We’re just friends.” Colter smirked. “You want to go down that road, Shaw? I can’t help but notice you and Reenie got that whole enemies to lovers vibe-”

“And that’s enough of that conversation,” he said, standing with a stretch. He reached into his pocket again, tossing you your phone. “Russell said it’s safe to carry again. Call if you ever need anything, Y/N.”

“Have I grown on you, Colter?” you teased. He rolled hie eyes as you handed him your empty mug. 

“Maybe. I’m working on the having friends thing.” 

“Well, you Shaw boys aren’t conventional but you’ve grown on me,” you said, opening your arms. “Come on. Let’s hug it out.”

“This is why I don’t do friends,” he half grumbled when he stepped into it, rubbing your back once more. “Hey and if you do think you want to try rewardist work, call me. We’ll talk, figure out a safe way for you to do this stuff.”

“What makes you think I won’t just go back home and do what I was before?” you asked. 

“Did you really want to do that crap again?” You frowned, shaking your head. He stepped back, pushing you towards the streamer. “That’s what I thought. Go pack. I’m sure Russell will be looking for you soon.”

One Hour Later

After leaving Colter with a promise to stay in touch, you arrived in a small town on the edges of a lake. It took a few minutes but your GPS eventually found the right road to head down. You had to question it when it told you that you’d arrived at your destination. The cabin Russell supposedly owned look more like a very expensive rustic mini-mansion some rich people would vacation to on the weekends.

Still, you pulled into the driveway and found Russell’s beat up car there. Cautiously you exited your car and went up the steps of the front porch, ringing the doorbell twice. A large wood door whipped open and you’d gotten your wish.

There was Russell before you. Damp hair slicked back, a few water droplets trailing down his broad chest and disappearing into the waist band of his navy sweatpants. You could see his tattoos scattered across his arm, a few on his wrist and thumbs and good god, how long had you been ogling his body?

Your head snapped up, Russell cockily leaning with one arm up against the doorframe wearing a satisfied smirk.

“Oh, please. Look all you want, babe.” You huffed and stormed past him, fighting the urge to turn around and see what his ass looked like in this skinny little joggers he had on. Nope. You had more self-control than that.

“You wish,” you said, surprised at the mixture of modern and rustic touches inside. “So you squatting here, Shaw?”

“I wish,” he chuckled, walking past you into the kitchen area, the smell of sandalwood and vanilla luring you to follow after. “I picked this place up after I got out of the military for cheap. Been renovating it room by room for the past decade.”

“Marble countertops?” you asked, rattling your knuckles against the white and silver veined surface. Russell leaned against the island, his biceps flexing with the movement. “I thought you said you aren’t made of money.”

“Maybe I want you to like me for me and not my wallet,” he said, looking at you through his eyelashes. “You know how much that visit to that little boutique set me back?”

“Oh, I think you can afford it,” you said, smiling as you slipped behind him, ruffling his damp strands. “Next time you want to buy me lingerie, just be a big boy and say so.”

“Here I was being thoughtful with no ulterior motives,” he said, standing and putting a hand to his chest. He frowned, closing his eyes in feigned pain. “I’m hurt, Y/N.”

“You can be thoughtful and at the same time admit you’d like to see what your choices look like.” He dropped his hand smiled.

“I really did buy them without expecting anything. I was there and thought a girl like you deserves something nice in her fucked up life.”

“I know, Russell,” you said quietly, offering him a smile. “I honestly do appreciate it.”

He nodded before going to his fridge and taking out a pair of waters, setting one on the counter near you. “You’re welcome. And if you were ever so inclined to want to show off my fashion choices, I suppose I could suffer through.”

“You’d really take that hit for the team wouldn’t you,” you teased. He hummed, crossing his arms.

“It’s a heavy burden but one I’m willing to bear.” You rolled your eyes and laughed quietly, slipping away before you got any closer to a half-naked Russell. 

You pretended to meander around the house, enjoying the openness compared to Colter’s airstreamer. A large fireplace sat in the corner and you could see through the glass doors to the back covered porch that another sat out there as well. 

“I made up the guest room.” You spun around, Russell pointing down a hallway. “Fresh sheets. Towels. I thought maybe you’d want to take a real shower and relax before you decide your next move.”

“Next move, huh.” You crossed your arms, looking out the back windows as dark clouds rolled in over the lake. “That your subtle way of saying I can’t go back home?”

Russell’s smile fell, quickly replaced with a neutral non-chalence you saw right through. He padded across the hardwoods over to your side, watching the clouds with you.

“I meant what I said last night. You’re safe. No one, and I mean no one, will ever come after you again. Go freshen up and we’ll talk after. I promise.”

“Fine. But only because Colter’s shower sucks.” You knew Russell was holding back something but you’d let it slide for the moment. A hot, long shower sounded amazing.

Forty minutes later you exited the guest suite with freshly washed hair, smooth legs and clean clothes. Alright, maybe they were Russell’s clothes he’d laid out on the bed for you but you weren’t complaining. 

“How was it?” he asked when you found him on the covered back porch, a hard rain coming down.

“I hate to sound like a girl but that was so much nicer than your brother’s tiny ass shower stall,” you said, enjoying the cool air on your flush skin. Russell refrained from saying anything about the black Stones shirt you had put on or the way you were drowning in his sweatpants. You ran your fingers through your hair, Russell watching you try to tame the mess it’d become. “You didn’t happen to pick up any hair ties or scrunchies when you clearly went to the store and got me stuff, did you?”

He reached into his pocket with a smile and a dark green scrunchie appeared on his wrist, your eyes wide. “Wait, really?”

“I’m smarter than I look,” he said. You nearly asked for it when you decided to turn around, presenting your back to him.

“Can you handle a messy bun?” you asked. A spark rang down your spine as he gathered up your hair on top of your head, gently pulling it together and securing it. You patted it when he finished, Russell taking a bow to an imaginary crowd. You put a hand on your hip, shaking your head. “Okay, how the hell do you know how to do that?”

“I could tell you but I’d have to kill you.” You rolled your eyes. “I learned it at special ops school.”

“Russ.” He laughed, taking a seat on the outdoor couch, arm over the back of it.

“I have a kid sister. I used to do her hair and shit when she was little.” You grinned, Russell holding up a finger.

“Don’t. Say-”

“Aw. What a good big brother you are,” you teased, sitting down next to him. Russell’s eyes glinted with a retort but he settled for letting his fingertips dance over your bare neck. Your breath hitched, Russell, cocking his head. “I can’t concentrate on what we need to talk about if you’re going to keep doing that.”

“Does that mean you don’t like it?” he asked, his body inviting you to tuck itself in right under that open arm. He grazed his fingers oh so lightly over your neck again and fuck, you wished he’d just grab hold and smash your lips to his already.

“You think just cause you’re sweet and thoughtful and hot and save a girl, you’ll win her over with your horrible flirting, just like that?” He leaned in close, so close you felt the heat radiating off his breath.

“I already won and she knows it. She just likes making me chase her.” You shivered when he thumbed over the back of your neck, a cocky smile on his face. “And she is a woman worth chasing so I will as long as she wants me to.”

You leaned in just when he pulled away and stood up, taking a seat in the chair opposite you with a big, stupid, cocky as fuck, smile on his face. 

“Fucker,” you growled. Russell only smiled harder. “You’re gonna pay for that.”

“Oh, I pray I do,” he said, putting his hands behind his head, licking his lips. Your eye twitched, Russell chuckling deeply. “That’s my little queen of darkness I adore.”

“We will continue this conversation later,” you said, cutting him off. Russell nodded, taking the zip up from nearby and unfortunately tugging it on over his bare chest.

“So,” he said, shoving his hands in the pockets, taking a deep breath. “You want to know what happened after you left.”

“That’d be nice, yes.” Russell pursed his lips, turning his head towards the downpour. “Russell. Come on.”

“I know you want details but I’m sorry, that’s not happening.” Your jaw dropped as he held up his hands. “You have had enough violence and death in your life. Now, I will answer your questions but I will use my discretion. You do not need…you don’t need that crap anymore. Please.”

Russell dropped his hand, leaning his elbows against his knees. When he looked up, his green eyes were somber and your heart did that flipping thing again.

“Are they all dead? The whole crew?” you asked quietly. He nodded. “That was like twenty five guys.”

“...Technically, they killed each other off. That’s why you didn’t hear about it in the news. Police are keeping it quiet.” 

“How…you tricked them?” you asked. He nodded again. “You’re sure all of them-”

“Every last one. Sides were drawn. Elpine and some of his crew got involved too, killed in the crossfire. There’s no mafia left there. No one will ever look for you again if you decide to go back.”

“If?” you asked. Russell shrugged.

“You were forced to do a job you didn’t want. You don’t want to patch up scummy guys off the street. You get to live the life you want to now. You can do that back in Virginia…or you can do a clean slate. Start over somewhere new.”

“You mean here. Stay here with you,” you said. You stood up, going to the railing, a cold breeze hitting you.

“This is a safe place and you can take as long as you need to figure out what you want to do.” You felt him behind you, his hands settling on your arms. “I have enough. I don’t want to be a private contractor forever. I am more than happy to walk away and start fresh myself.”

“Russell, you are asking a lot.”

“No I’m not.” You frowned, closing your eyes. “Despite…I’m not asking you to pick me. I’m not that crazy. I know we’re still figuring each other out. I’m asking you to pick yourself. I’m asking you to trust now that I am not like those people you worked with. You never have to pick me if that’s what you want and there are no stings attached. Ever. Just don’t go back there. Start over somewhere where life will be kind to you.”

He rubbed your arms once before you felt him move away. You glanced back over your shoulder, Russell going to the fireplace and squatting down in front of it. A moment later, flames appeared and he was tossing a few logs from nearby inside.

“Russell.” He hummed, adjusting a large log with a sharp poker. He kept his back to you for a long beat, slowly rising and setting the poker aside. When he finally looked at you, his face was neutral, void of any signs of how he actually felt. You fidgeted, tugging down the hem of your shirt awkwardly. “Put aside the flirting. You and me…it’s not going to work out.”

“You’re sure about that, are you?” You scoffed, Russell holding up his hands. 

You stormed over to him, stabbing a finger in his firm chest. “I am not whatever you think I am. I’m not a damsel looking for her white knight to come save her. I didn’t ask you to take care of my problem. You decided to do that, not me. I don’t owe you anything.”

He slowly blinked, staring down with the tiniest hint of a smirk. 

“Why are you always fucking smiling?” you growled. 

“Well if you’re going to be the grumpy then I got to be the sunshine.”

“We’re not a fucking trope! I-I don’t need you. I don’t need you to buy me things. Or do things for me. Or offer to let me stay in this beautiful house. I’ve spent my whole life alone. There is no such thing as a good guy. All you want is in my fucking pants so let’s just fuck and get this fucking thing over with so I can go the fuck home.”

Russell’s eyebrows raised. He nodded, crossing his arms. “I’m not fucking you.”

“What? That’s…you’ve been flirting the second we met!” 

“Oh, we’re past the hookup stage. We do this, it’s cause we’re the real deal.”

“Insufferable,” you muttered, going inside, pacing back and forth in the family room. To your extreme annoyance, Russell didn’t follow you. He just sat out there next to his fireplace, watching the rain come down. He really wasn’t going to talk to you about this? He was going to ignore you?

You huffed, wandering throughout the house and finding it frustratingly gorgeous. While it certainly leaned masculine as did most rustic style homes single men lived it, it felt…cozy. There was a warmth to it, even in the large expanses, that you hadn’t felt since you were a child. It was built almost like a retreat, Russell’s safe place away from the world.

You sat down on the top set of the stairs, frowning with your head in your hands.

Was there such a thing as a good guy? No, Russell wanted you for sex. A quick fuck. Maybe a fuck buddy at most but that was it. Right? He was a single man in his forties. Ex-military and he still did contracted black ops work. He was a trained killer. A deadly weapon hidden under a boyish smile and pretty face. There was no way he was a good guy that actually wanted a normal life.

“Do you always talk to yourself?” Your head snapped up, Russell giving you an awkward little wave from the landing a few feet away. You groaned, wiping your face off when you felt the trickle of tears on your cheeks. Russell stepped up and stopped, sitting down a few steps below you, close enough to reach out and grab your hand. 

“I should go,” you said. Russell simply held out his open palm, your own hands now held in your lap.

“Whether I’m good or bad, I’ll leave that up to somebody else to decide. I don’t live my life in the black and white. But I can tell you if I only wanted to screw you, I would never have invited you to my home.” You stared down at your lap, closing your eyes when his callused thumb wiped under your eye, pushing away a rogue tear. “You ain’t a damsel. You’re my queen of darkness, remember?”

Your lip twitched up briefly, Russell letting out some satisfied little sound.

“I meant what I said earlier. Stay. Rest. Figure out your next move on your own time. If me being here complicates that, I can duck out.”

“No.” You grasped his wrist, flicking open your eyes. His palm felt so hot to the touch, your heart skipping when he grazed your skin. “Stay here.”

“Okay then,” he said. He stood, leaning over and kissing your forehead. Then he was moving down the steps, whistling a peppy tune. “I’m going to make us some grilled cheese and tomato soup. Love me some grilled cheese.”

“Wait!” you called, following him down the stairs. Russell spun around at the bottom, smiling up at you. “Why…I…I-I don’t understand. You’re really just going to let me stay here? Without committing to anything?”

His face fell, brow furrowing. “You’re really starting to scare me, Y/N. When’s the last time there was someone decent in your life?”

“I’m not sure anymore,” you said quietly. “The idea of someone like you being so kind crosses a lot of wires in my head.”

“That’s why you keep freaking out when I’m not a dick and give you space.” You nodded, fidgeting with the bottom of your shirt again. He smiled, reaching up, offering his hand again. You let yours slip into it, Russell lacing your fingers together. “Well, I ain’t like other men, sweetheart. I promise you that.”

“Why me?” you asked, taking a step down, putting you at eye level with him. “I mean, why wouldn’t you want someone normal?”

“A normal girl sounds boring. Now queen of darkness? That sounds like a woman that’s badass enough to put up with me. Let’s stop freaking out, go make lunch, and let me try to help you what you want to do, okay?”

“Okay.”

“Perfect.” He pecked a kiss on your cheek, pulling you along after him. “So. Has a man ever cooked for you?”

You shook your head, Russell frowning. You yelped when he picked you up and sat you on the kitchen counter, caging you in with his muscular arms on either side.

“Alright then Y/N Y/L/N. I’m about to make you the best goddamn lunch of your life.” Before he could move, you wrapped your legs tight around his waist, keeping him so, so close. Russell’s gaze turned heated, eyes darkening. “Don’t do that.”

“Do what?” you breathed out, Russell leaning in close.

“Don’t take me unless you plan on keeping me. Based on our previous conversation, we are not there.” Slowly, you unhooked your legs, Russell straightening, looking you up and down, eyes no less dark.

“Russ?” He stared at you, licking his lips.

“Fuck it.”

And then he slammed his lips to yours, stealing your breath away in the goddamn best kiss of your life.

_________

A/N: Read Part 4 here!

[hellfirexhoe]

Tuesdays? | Eddie Munson x Bitchy Reader

summary: sort of prequel to Wednesdays, Eddie and reader are enemies who like to ruin each other on Wednesday nights, and this is how that situation first started happening (reader and Eddie are both over 18)

3,000+ words

warnings: horndog content so 18+ only please - MINORS DNI, lots of swearing, name calling, degradation, enemies to lovers fuck buddies, rough sex, p in v, protected sex, oral (m receiving), bad writing, skipped meals, little bit of gross eddie, pervy eddie, bitchy reader, v. brief dubcon, harassment, female reader

Series Masterlist

You push your lunch away in disgust as you accidentally look over at Eddie Munson’s table, he’s talking animatedly with his friends, mouth full and spraying food everywhere, his friends are laughing at whatever he’s saying, almost deafeningly loud. It doesn’t seem to bother anyone else in the lunch room, but for you messy eating is a cardinal sin, it makes you feel physically sick. Deciding your appetite probably won’t return your bus your tray, apologize to your friends and head to the library. The rest of the hour passes without interruption and you’re in better spirits as you head to Spanish, nibbling on an energy bar. It’s the only class you have with Eddie, this year’s schedule had been kinder to you than last, last year you were in a majority of classes with him and for the first week or so you’d found him funny, charming even, but the obnoxious behavior and constant tapping on the table had soured you to him pretty badly.

Your usual desk buddy was out sick so you had the entire desk to yourself, until Eddie walked in and plopped down next to you, lunch still around his mouth. Great. You gritted your teeth and turned your whole body away, determined to block out the boy next to you, it was only an hour and then you would be on your way to an Eddie-free gym class, followed by an equally Eddie-free car ride home, to your Eddie-free house. This became a mantra in your head as the lesson started.

Eddie’s class clown routine started about 5 minutes in and by 15 minutes you were contemplating faking cramps to get out of the classroom. By some miracle you manage to stave off the urge to stab him with your pen and focus on the lesson, when the bell finally rings you unclench your jaw, gather your books and flee the room before Eddie has even stopped tapping on the desk. Chrissy is waiting for you outside and laughs at your strained expression,

“Why do you let him bother you so much? He sits way at the back, miles from you. Just ignore him.”

You shake your head, “Marsha’s out today, so he decided he’d keep me company. Fucking insufferable I tell you.”

“Maybe you need to buy some goodies from his lunch box and you’ll be able to tolerate him more.” Chrissy jokes as you groan,

“I’m not buying drugs from the town freak Chrissy, I have better plugs than that.”

“You know I heard the weirdest thing the other day,” You look at her, “Apparently the freak thing extends to the bedroom, like he’s into some kinky shit.”

“Absolutely no fucking way Chrissy. That boy is as much of a virgin as the day he was born, doubt he’d even know where to put it.”

Chrissy shakes her head “Nope, from what I’ve heard its big and he knows how to use it.” She’s whispering loudly to you, eyes flitting around to make sure no one’s listening as you walk the corridor.

“Chrissy Cunningham. Are you really trying to tell me that Eddie Munson has a huge dick?” As you speak your left shoulder is pushed by someone, your heart sinks when you realize it is a beet-red Eddie storming past you both. “Shit. Well now I feel like a total bitch.” Chrissy cringes with you and you carry on to your gym. The lesson passes quickly and the final bell rings out, announcing your freedom.

You and Chrissy link arms as you step out into the parking lot, letting each other go with over the top waves and reaching for each other. She reaches her car first, and doesn’t notice what you do when you look over at your car. Shit. Eddie’s leaning against your car, looking pissed, so he definitely heard us earlier then. You walk over, checking to see you have witnesses,

“H-hey Eddie.”

“Hey Eddie? That really all you have to say?” Eddie raises an eyebrow, “If either of you are so fucking curious about my dick that you want to be yelling about it in the corridor, please feel free to ask to see it.”

“I’m sorry we didn-”

“You didn’t know I could hear your whole conversation? So you’re not going to apologize for being a total bitch, just that I heard it? Nice. Real fuckin’ nice.” Eddie stalks off, simmering.

“Why the fuck are you so mad anyway? Not like we were yelling ‘Eddie Munson has a tiny dick’.” You call after him, taunting him, attracting a small audience. Eddie’s tall frame freezes and he rounds back on you, stepping so close you’re pressed up against your car, a wicked smile on his face as he whispers in your ear,

“Keep taunting me and you’ll find out how big it is when its down your throat.” You’re a little too stunned to come up with a snarky reply for that, and by the time you do Eddie is already across the lot, smile still on his face. You climb into your car and head home for that Eddie-free evening you had promised yourself. Except your mind wasn’t allowing you your reprieve, you kept thinking about Eddie’s words, twisted as they were.

You barely sleep that night and you curse Chrissy for the fact that you simply cannot stop wondering just how big Eddie Munson’s dick is. You were perfectly happy not thinking about that before today, if anyone had asked you to picture him naked you would have managed to imagine smooth hard plastic under his trousers, like a Ken doll, but now you’re wondering about his girth? I hate that girl. You huff as you read 3.14am on your clock.

Somewhere in the night you manage to fall asleep but it feels like minutes have passed when your alarm trills. You manage to drag yourself through the motions and pack on enough concealer to cover an entire cheer squad, hoping to disguise the bags under your eyes. After downing a scalding coffee you manage to perk yourself up enough to get to school safely. You get to Spanish and notice Marsha’s seat occupied by your new desk buddy, Eddie, who has his feet propped up on your side, you stare pointedly at them until he adjusts, tucking his feet under the desk.

“You look like you’ve slept terribly. Guilty conscience or could you not stop yourself from thinking about my dick?”

You don’t reply, which earns a snort from Eddie. “So the second one then. Like I said, if you’re curious just ask.” He winks at you and you roll your eyes.

Your brain is too tired to catch the next words before they escape your lips,

“Fine, let’s say I’m curious. Show me.”

Eddie looks at you wide-eyed, “Yeah, I’m not getting my dick out in a room which is like half full of minors.”

“Not now, you moron.”

“Also this isn’t show and fucking tell, nor is my dick my most treasured possession.” He pauses “Okay maybe only the first part of that is true.”

“You’re so disgusting.”

“Says the girl who just asked me to show her my dick to satisfy some kind of morbid curiosity. Besides, what am I getting in return? I’d hate to disappoint you or ruin my reputation as a freak but flashing you or anyone else for that matter isn’t top of my list of things to do on a Friday.”

You decide silence is your best option, your brain can’t adequately filter your words so you stay mute for the remainder of the day. Eddie, satisfied that he’s worked you up so much you can’t even speak, has the biggest shit-eating grin on his lips. Once the bell rings for the end of class Eddie is up before you, and as you stand to leave he turns around and makes an obscene gesture with his tongue at you, winks then disappears into the corridor. You become intimately familiar with the gesture throughout the day because you swear everywhere you look the metalhead is appearing from nowhere, performing.

“What is that about?” Chrissy asks after she notices Eddie’s performance,

“I asked to see his dick and now he’s harassing me I guess.”

“You did what??”

“I’m tired, my brain can’t filter.” Chrissy is creasing with laughter at you,

“Has it really been such a dry spell that you’re looking to Eddie?”

“No, its your damn fault anyway, I could have gone my whole life never wondering if Eddie Munson truly has a big dick.”

“Oh he does,” your friend Louise appears beside Chrissy and you roll your eyes,

“Fucking fantastic, where have you heard that from?”

As you walk you feel a hand slip past your ass and place something in your back pocket, Eddie walks past you quickly, making it obvious to you that it was him. You excuse yourself to the bathroom and duck into a stall, retrieving a scrap of paper from the pocket of your skirt, the scrawl is messy and barely readable but you make it out eventually, it’s an address and the words “tuesday 7pm wear your cheer uniform”.

Is he fucking with me right now? Does he really think I’m going to turn up at his trailer and worship his dick?

By the time Tuesday afternoon rolls around you estimate you have received about 17 sexual remarks from Eddie in words or gestures and are now planning on going to his trailer to yell at him for being an absolute pig, and possibly murder him. You’re not sure on the second objective, might be a bit too much work for a Tuesday, plus you’d need help to move the body and there would be all those questions.

At 6.45pm you’re getting in your car, decidedly not in your cheer uniform, because that was just too weird. The whole situation is weird, you’re driving to Eddie Munson’s trailer? That he invited you to? You pull up at 7.07pm, trying to exit your car as quietly as you can. Eddie must have heard you, or been watching at the window because he opens the door before you can knock, you step in and immediately poke him square in the chest with a pointed nail,

“What the fuck is your problem Munson?” You yell, “Quit the harassment, you’re being a fucking pervert.”

“You drove all the way out here to yell at me?” Eddie smirks, “You must really care.”

“That’s the thing, I really don’t, you’re just being an absolute pig and I’ve had enough!” You’re breathing hard and squaring your shoulders, you’re so angry with him that your hands are shaking. So Eddie’s next move of pushing you against the wall and kissing you completely throws you off guard, you grab a handful of his hair and pull forcing him to break the kiss.

“Okay. Fuck. OW. Might have misread the moment, my bad.”

“What in the fuck did you think that moment was?”

“I thought you were one of those girls who gets all horny when they’re angry. Evidently I was wrong.” He’s not wrong, you are exactly one of those girls but it’s Eddie. Gross, messy eater, desk tapping until you go insane, insufferable, rude Eddie.

“Fuck. Lets just get this over with.” You sigh as you start unbuttoning your skirt and shimmying it down your legs, Eddie is now truly bewildered,

“Get what over with? What is happening right now?”

“We’re going to fuck. We’re going to get this,” you gesture to the air around you both “out of our systems. And then I can go back to thinking you’re a disgusting pig, and you can go back to thinking I’m an uptight bitch. Sound good?”

Eddie shrugs and starts taking his shirt off, not taking his eyes off you undressing for a second, like his own personal strip tease. He smirks when he catches your jaw drop slightly at the size of his bulge. Chrissy and Louise’s intel had been correct.

“Wait. We need some ground rules,” you pause, both of you now in your underwear.

“O..kay,”

“No kissing when we get down to it.”

“Get down to it, christ you’re romantic.”

“No! That’s the point, this isn’t romance, this isn’t love, this isn’t even a fucked up friendship. This is just fucking because hormones and pheromones and all that other scienc-y crap.”

“Gotcha. Positions?”

“No missionary. Also no pet names, I’m fine with you degrading me but I don’t want none of that ‘princess’ mushyness. And you are definitely not going in me bareback.”

“Definitely not, wouldn’t want to catch whatever evil you have. Safe words?”

“You planning to get so pussy drunk I’d need a safe word to pull you out of it?”

“That’s the hope.”

“Red for stop, yellow for pause.” Eddie nods

“Bed?” You glance around the living room and nod, surely the bedroom would be a little more comfortable. Once you’re in his bedroom Eddie appears a little awkward,

“How do you want to, I mean uhh,” Eddie’s voice trails off,

“Guess I’m taking the lead tonight huh stud?” You drop to your knees and pull his boxers down, making him gasp at your forwardness. You spit in your hand and use it to pump along his length, smirking when you see his eyes roll back and his bottom lip captured by his teeth. You keep him in your hand as your tongue runs over his swollen head, lapping up the drops of precum that had formed, earning a deep primal moan from Eddie. You start to take the tip of his cock in your mouth, sucking gently as you pump his length firmly, as he moans and his legs start to shake you suck harder, taking more of his length in your mouth, bobbing up and down and revelling in the noises escaping Eddie’s mouth. Ringed fingers begin to tangle in your hair, gathering it into a loose ponytail, you appreciate the somewhat chivalrous act and starting taking him deeper, lips down to the base and tip sliding down your throat

“Jesus H. Christ do you even have a gag reflex?” You shake your head, drawing back slightly only to suck him back in, earning a loud cry of pleasure from Eddie. He’s already beginning to sound so pathetic and needy. You pull back, releasing his cock from the vacuum of your mouth with a wet ‘pop’ and he almost collapses back onto his bed, panting, cock twitching as though it was searching to be back in your mouth again. While he’s temporarily stunned you unclasp your bra and drop your underwear to the floor, not paying any attention to where they fall as you climb onto the bed, pausing to grab a condom from the pack on his nightstand. You remember a trick you had learned at a sleepover and put the now unwrapped condom in your mouth, Eddie watches you curiously and then gasps as you use your mouth to sheathe his cock,

“Where the fuck did you learn to do that?”

“You can thank Chrissy for that trick. Practiced on many a banana in the Cunningham kitchen.”

Your hovering above him, pussy just centimeters away from the tip of his cock, about to slide down when Eddie grabs you to stop you,

“I haven-haven’t warmed you up yet, that’s not very gentlemanly.”

You lean down to whisper in his ear “If I want you to be a gentleman, I’ll ask for it. Right now I want you to fuck me.” You grab his hand and place it against your clit and run it down to your soaked hole, “I’m sure I can take you, all those pathetic little mewls you did seem to have done the trick.” Eddie still insisted on sticking his fingers inside you, gathering up your wetness and using it to lube up his cock before sucking his fingers clean, as you slide down you whisper in his ear,

“Such a fucking pervert, licking me up like that.” Eddie’s cock throbs inside you and you moan, loving the pressure of him filling you up. His hands are on your hips, helping you to ride harder and faster until your bodies are slamming against each other, the headboard on the bed threatening to make a dent in the wall, you can see Eddie’s eyes becoming unfocused as he gets pussy drunk inside you,

“Eddie?”

“Hnhmh?”

“I fucking hate you.” His eyes snap back, razor sharp focus now trained on you as he starts slamming you down on his cock harder than before, his fingers dipping between you two to start rubbing your clit, “Do you hate this too, princess.” Eddie utters a forbidden word but in such a sneering way, so laced with venom that he might have just been calling you a cum dump.

You nod, breathing faster as you feel your orgasm building, “You’re bad at this.”

Eddie laughs “Tell that to your fucking pussy that’s trying to throttle me.” Your walls are contracting around him almost painfully tight as you get to the edge of your orgasm, Eddie keeps his pressure and pattern going and within seconds you’re ruined, legs shaking, back arching, crying and cursing as your orgasm wracks through your body. Eddie finishes shortly after you, pulling you down and holding you so tight you can barely breathe.

You slide off of Eddie and catch your breath while he takes the condom off and ties it before throwing it into the bin.

“We should do this again sometime. How do Tuesdays sound?”

You laugh breathlessly, “Wednesday nights work better for me.”

“You’re still an uptight bitch who has no awareness for the people around her.”

“And you’re still a fucking pervert.”

“In that case I’m keeping your panties as a trophy.”

“So disgusting.”

The next day your hips have finger shaped bruises all over them, your lips are swollen and you can hardly sit down without wincing. As you sit at your lunch table you catch Eddie smirking at you as your wince once your body makes contact with the unforgiving plastic. You glare at him and give him the middle finger. Chrissy catches this,

“Oh so it is definitely big.”

You give her a pained nod.

“Huge.”

[san8ny]

Figure it out?

an: Maria is very condescending, reader cant stand on SHITTT, slight tommy slander, maria eats ur box idk

req: @fleshunger

It’s been days.

A week to be exact.

7 whole days that you’ve been sitting at the phone, wallowing as you twirl the cord mindlessly around your fingers.

She said she’d call. She wouldn’t lie, I mean, she said she’d send something over as a telling that he’d be gone for the week, yet no damn sign.

Sighing, you slam the phone down on the rotary dial and kick your feet over the lovechair, leaning back. She got you again.

This hasn’t been the first, second or even third time that Maria has played in your face; you like to think her job around town gives her this complex, that she can do whatever she wants with no regards to anyones feelings. That, or she really is an asshole. Or both?

After some time, (and the embroidery of the chair practically branding onto your skin) you decide to head on down to her office, see for yourself if she really is busy—

ok, you didn’t.

Lunging at the phone, you dial her work phone hastily, walking around a bit as it dials, you had it bad.

“Hello?” A scratchy voice answers, knees giving out at the raspiness laced in her usual smoothness.

“You didn’t call.” You quietly murmur into the reciever, “and you said you would.”

The older woman sighs as she instantly recognizes your sweet voice, “Baby, i’m at work.”

it’s met with a scoff, “Of course you are.”

The blonde cocks a brow at this new-found attitude, though it wasn’t unexpected, she had been admittedly avoiding you since Tommy’s departure to Arizona.

“Since when do you care what I do with my time?” She grazes, taking the end of the ballpen she’d been writing with inbetween her teeth.

“Since you started seeing me instead of your husband.”

Silence.

“That’s funny. I don’t remember you ever complaining about that?“ She chuckles, eyes trained on the plain cream wall—all while your hands grow increasingly clammier with each moment that passes

“Infact, I quite vividly remember you begging to come over whenever he left for patrols.”

“So?” You retort, pathetically trying to hide the croak in your voice that threatens to peek thorugh as Maria’s demeanor becomes cockier than ever.

“So why the sudden concern in what the fuck I do?”

She had a point; a point so concrete that it made you put the phone down all while Maria confusingly talks into it, asking if you’re still there.

So why are you tearing up now?

Were you hurt over the only woman you’ve ever liked now blatantly saying she doesn’t give a single fuck about you, or it being the cold truth?

After a moment of gathering yourself, you reach a point.

“You know what?” you clear your voice, “So be it. Be with your fucking husband, see if I care.”

“You will—

“I won’t.” You cut her off, throwing the phone across the living room, chips of dry wall coming off as the connector detaches from the wall socket.

Harshly running your palms up and down your thighs anxiously, you try to not cry.

What did you deserve to be so unloved by a person?

Meanwhile, Maria internally conflicts with herself in the office as she begrudgingly grabs her keys and walks out, unfinished papers scattered all over her desk.

she’d been debating whether or not she should continue this act up, in a sliver of a chance you get the hint and drop her like she’s done with every girl she’s ever set her sights on prior to you, but it’s only proven to have edged you on.

She likes you, she really does,

but who, in this god forsaken town, would take her serious if they found out she’d been hooking up with some random woman..all while cheating on her husband?

It’s not cheating, Maria reminds herself; she and tommy had been separated for some time, they’ve just never found the right time to announce it, or finalize it.

I mean, they’d just gotten Ellie and Joel back, set up new perimeters around town, established telephone towers and—

Fuck, does she need a drink.

Question is, if the bar is that way..

why was she at your door?

That’s the question you ask yourself as you stare up at the bleach blonde woman who seemingly tilts her head at you blankly.

you’ve got to be kidding me.

Neither one of you talk as Maria clears her voice, and you shift your weight from foot to foot.

“Well?” Maria shrugs, reaching back into her pocket and grabbing a lone cigarette, “I’m here, aren’t I?”

You blink a few times before immediately closing the door, which isn’t met with success, sterling cowboy boot wedged in-between the doorframe and the literal door.

“Mrs. Miller, get your foot out of my door.”

“Oh, it’s ‘Mrs. Miller’ now?” She taunts, looking you up and down, from the camisole you wear to the ridiculously small pajama shorts.

“It’s been that before I even met you, so yeah.”

Maria takes a few more drags as your words sink in, ultimately nodding and clicking her tongue, turning back towards the dirt path she’d just came from.

You take that as initiative to close the door, but she points a finger at you warningly, “Don’t you even try.”

After a bit, she turns back around, and walks into your home— sitting on the couch like it was nobody’s business; as if she hadn’t just left the busy office to be with her infamous call-up.

“You’ve got nerve.” You hiss, crossing your arms as you scan her attire: For a woman caring for everyone else, she barely had time for herself. Her usual put-togetherness was just..off.

Maybe that’s why she started this with you, because you’d been the only one that hasn’t seen her as some up-tight.

Maria’s low-lidded eyes drink you up, like the first time she met you outside the stables with your dad when you both arrived in Jackson.

She remembers exactly how you reacted when Tommy introduced her to you as his wife, wide eyes that screamed animosity, envy and every greed-like feeling out there.

It wouldn’t have been the first time Tommy has been chased after, I mean, look at her.

So one warm summer night, Maria decides to invite you over to help with dinner; it’d be fun, getting to know you. You arrive with some of your own cutlery and containers, smiling at her with saccharine glossy lips as you hug her.

Maria should’ve set boundaries.

She should’ve, when she saw the way your eyes would be trained on her figure as she made dinner,

Or maybe she was a hypocrite, from how she’d been using her own excuses to touch you that night.

From feeling up the silk nightgown you had on, to pressing her groin into your plush backside to ‘pass by’ or smelling your hair when you mentioned you’d switched over to this new shampoo you found.

She should have told you it was wrong,

To be feeling this way about a married woman.

She didn’t.

Instead, she took you on every surface in that house of hers that night, remembering your gasps and whines so clearly when she’d tap 2 fingers on your swollen clit, arousal spreading through her loins like a forest fire while simultaneously sitting and spreading you on her own jean-clad thighs infront of the oakdoor— the same door they were expecting Tommy to exhaustingly walk in through after patrol any minute now.

It downright was the most exhilarating thing Maria had ever experienced in her entirety of living in an apocalyptic timeline, all while being being married. The scenario that her estranged husband could walk in on her while she toys around with your messy cunt.

To say she went through some sort of realization would be an understatement, that singular event altered her brain chemistry so much so, that she could physically no longer stand to sleep in the same bed as her husband without picturing him as you, which might’ve been one of the very catalysts that caused their separation— who knows?

And it didn’t bother her, it didn’t bother her that you didn’t mind sleeping with her. The bother, was how long they could keep this up.

Until then, Maria would continue to see you.

She’d drop anything, just so she could bury her head inbetween your thighs.

Which brings us up to where they are now.

“You have to leave”

You sigh as you lean on the doorframe, shorts accentuating whatever you did or didnt have under.

“Do you want me to?” Maria whispers as she spreads her legs ever so slightly, eyes boring into your doe ones as she leans back, practically inviting you to sit on her lap.

Overstimulated and overwhelmed, your eyes begin to water up, she was so mean. How could she expect you to forget that phone call?

“Cmere, doll..” Maria utters lowly as she throws the cigarette onto a nearby ashtray and ushers you over with a beckoning hand, weak legs treading over to her as you try not to act the slightest bit effected.

You should be mad, but how could you?

How could you be mad when the older woman’s eyes glaze over as she pulls you into her arms, letting you voice your profanities and anger as she rubs your lower back?

“I love you, you know that..” She says, nodding as she looks up at you.

You sniffle as you pull back from her shoulder and look down back at her, straddling each side of her leg like your life depended on it; Maria’s gaze trickles down your body as she reaches both hands down and begins ever so lightly kneading your inner-thighs, groans betraying and escaping you.

“You can’t fucking treat me like this, and expect to come back..” You manage to say through clenched teeth, eyes looking everywhere but her own— anywhere.

Maria hums as she buries her face into your nape, littering messy kisses as broad arms wrap around your figure, grinding you down onto her own like you weighed nothing.

“I treat you better than him.” She murmurs, giving you one final chaste kiss on the lips before laying you down— both switching positions as she crouches down in between your legs— leveling her head to your mound, “Wanna see?”

You bite your bottom lip as you stare up at the ceiling, “please..” Maria licks at her dry ones, hooking her thumbs inside your shorts and rolling them down slowly, gasping at the light string of pre-cum that connects to them and your sheen pussy.

She smiles as she probes a finger lightly around the most sensitive part of you, tapping to test the waters as your hips stutter.

She’s always loved how shaven or not, it seems to always be the prettiest part about you other than your eyes and breasts.

With one final kiss to your lower stomach, Maria licks a fat strip up your pussy to your hidden-away clit, whispers of how good you taste as she lets a light glob of spit spread in with the other mess she’s going to have to clean up— happily, why of course.

“F—fuck! Maria..” You sigh contentfully as she goes to town, ravishing you like no other; Your hand busies itself by tangling inside Maria’s slickback hair, bunching up whatever you can and steering her through whatever speed you wanted.

Lifting your head up from the couch throw pillow, you finally meet her gaze, tongue darting inside and out your twitching hole. So many thoughts, yet nothing at all.

She’s lazy as she laps you up, wanting to get every detailing of your cunt before she makes you cum. She does it for herself mostly, though it makes you feel good so it’s killing 2 birds with one stone.

“Gonna, g—na! oh fuck fuck fuck! I’m gonna cum!” You cry out as Maria speeds up, drawing figure 8’s on your pearl, as her other hand holds your erratic hips down.

“There we go, there we go, ‘cmon now..give it to me.” Maria rambles into your pussy, opting to alternate and instead latch on your clit, slamming 3 long digits into you harshly.

Once you feel the hot coil in your gut begin to unravel, you feel lighter, seemingly drenching both your couch and Maria’s face in your cum.

Catching her own breath, Maria smiles, and after a while—pops the fingers out of your hole, and into her mouth instead, as she watches the milky fluid escape you and onto the ruined sofa.

And for the first time,

You notice Maria is not wearing her wedding band.

[justagalwhowrites]

...Can Be Found

You and Joel have an unexpected night alone in Jackson. A canon Lavender one-shot set between chapters 47 and 48.

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female Reader from Lavender

Length: 3k

Warnings: Smut :). All the fluff in all the world. Eric Clapton. No use of Y/N. Minors DNI 18+ only.

A/N: Thank you all so much for loving these characters and hanging out for the Lavenderversary celebration. I hope you love seeing what Joel and Doc were up to today in Jackson ❤️

April 30, 2024 

“Please?” Ellie said, her eyes bright and wide and eager. “All the other kids are going and Maria said they’re making some special snacks and shit and they’re putting on some movie I’ve never fucking heard of and I really want to see it, please?” 

You glanced at Joel, who looked quickly back at you. 

Neither of you had been anticipating this. You hadn’t been in Jackson all that long, Ellie had only been going to school for a few weeks. You hadn’t really spent much time apart, not really. Even Joel, who was regularly leaving Jackson to go on patrol, had never been outside the house overnight. There was a comfort in coming home to each other at the end of the day, the three of you squeezing onto the couch in your living room to watch a movie or clustering on the ground where you could lean against each other while playing a board game. You functioned as a unit now, each of you far more comfortable and secure with the others close. 

Ellie wanting to go to the town lock in hadn’t even been on your radar. 

But it was a good sign, you thought. She was becoming more and more like her old self every day. She enjoyed school, had made a few friends, was starting to think about what she wanted to do to contribute to Jackson as she got older. It was good to see her here, being happy and having a life. Her wanting to spend time away was good. It just didn’t feel good.

“I promise I won’t even say fuck,” Ellie said, still pleading. “And I’ll leave my knife at home.” 

“You should always leave your knife at home,” Joel said, voice stern. “No reason to be carryin’ it around here, anyway…” 

“Yeah, OK,” Ellie rolled her eyes and you had to fight the urge to laugh. 

You and Joel looked at each other again for a moment. You could tell he was feeling the same unease you were, the same desire to keep Ellie where you could see her at all times because that’s the only way you could be sure that she was safe and whole. 

But you couldn’t do that forever. 

You sighed and looked back at her. 

“Yes, you can go,” you said. 

“Yes!” She darted around you to run up the stairs but you stopped her quickly. 

“But you have to come back here before going anywhere else tomorrow morning,” you said. “And you have to be on your best behavior, OK gremlin? I know how you can be, no picking fights…” 

“I’ll be good, I promise!” She said, frozen with one foot on the stairs. 

“Then go get your stuff,” you said, Ellie taking off before you even really had a chance to finish talking, forcing her to yell up the stairs after her. “Make sure you grab your pillow and sleeping bag!” 

Joel came and stood beside you at the banister, his hand finding the small of your back, slipping below your shirt to brush his fingers over you there.

“Think we’re gonna be empty nesters for the night,” he said, voice low. 

“Think you’re right,” you smiled a little. “Whatever will we do?” 

“Oh, I think we can figure somethin’ out.” 

Ellie left not long after, running down the front walk to catch some of her friends from school as they headed toward the mess hall turned lock-in site for the night. 

“Here,” Joel said, standing next to you on the porch as the two of you watched her laugh with her friends. “Why don’t you get comfortable, I’ll be back in a few.” 

You narrowed your eyes at him. 

“What are you up to?” 

“Just trust me,” he laughed and nudged you to the porch swing. “And be patient.” 

You smiled and shook your head a little but settled into the side of the swing that you’d come to think of as yours, pushing lightly off the ground with your toe, breathing in the cool, clean spring air, the scent of rain drifting in from the dark clouds on the horizon. 

There was a distant rumble of thunder as the screen door creaked open and Joel came outside, two mugs held tight in one large hand, the neck of his guitar in the other. 

“I think we’re getting a spring storm,” you said as he leaned the guitar against the house and handed you a mug before taking a seat next to you. You lifted the mug and breathed deep, your eyebrows shooting up. “Is that…” 

“Coffee,” he smiled a little. “With a little lavender syrup that, I’m ashamed to admit, I needed a lot of help to make.” 

You looked at him, feeling like you might be about to cry you were so touched. 

“You made me lavender syrup?” 

He shrugged. 

“Figured it’d been long enough since you’d had your favorite coffee,” he said. “Heard through the grapevine that some traders who come through sometimes have coffee. Figured I’d have it ready for when I could get my hands on some.” 

“Have I told you lately that I love you?” You asked. “Because I do.” 

“You’ve said,” he smiled. “Still like hearin’ it, though.” 

You took a sip of the coffee and savored it and thought, for a moment, about the first time you’d met Joel. So long ago now at that coffee shop in Austin, when you were just 20 years old and hoping to find a job you liked that would make you not need to take out more loans to survive the summer. You should have known when you first sat across from him, sipping your lavender latte and talking about his daughter, that your life would never be the same. 

Joel put his arm over the back of the swing and you settled into his side, your head on his shoulder, grateful for his warmth as temperature dropped and the rain moved in. 

“Think you’ll let me play you somethin’?” He asked. 

“I believe it is well established that I am the president and founder of the Rockstar Joel Miller fan club,” you teased. “You can always play me something.” 

“Good,” he said, taking his arm back and reaching behind him to pick up the guitar and resting it on his lap. “Because I’ve been working on something for you. Been a long time since I’ve played for anyone so be patient with me.” 

“The peanut gallery will be quiet,” you smiled, tucking yourself into the corner of the swing and putting your stocking feet against Joel’s warm thigh as the rain grew heavier. You held your mug tightly in your fingers, the heat and coffee running low. 

He started playing, quiet and slow and you recognized it immediately, your breath catching in your throat. 

“It's late in the evening,” Joel sang in his soft baritone. “She's wondering what clothes to wear…”

You just listened in silent awe as he played you Wonderful Tonight, the song you’d claimed as yours, for the first time in 20 years. When he finished, he left the guitar in his lap for a moment before glancing over at you, an oddly vulnerable look in his eyes when he did. 

“Didn’t say the peanut gallery needed to be that quiet,” he said, his voice thick. 

“Joel,” you whispered, setting your coffee on the small side table before damn near throwing yourself at him. He set the guitar down quickly, barely fast enough to catch you as you threw your arms around his neck. He laughed, sinking back into the swing with you in his arms. 

“You like it then?” He asked. 

You pulled back enough to look at him properly, tears pricking your eyes. 

“I loved it,” you said softly. “That was… I can’t believe you learned that!” 

“Well,” he shrugged. “Already learned it, once upon a time. More just remembering something I always knew. I was just coming home to it is all.” 

You kissed him and he kissed you back before you settled in against his side again, the two of you swaying as the rain fell and the thunder rolled. 

“Know what storms remind me of now?” He asked quietly after a while, his fingers trailing up and down your arm. 

“Hm?” 

“The night I got you back.” 

You looked up at him from your place against his chest and found him watching you, his brown eyes soft and deep. 

“Me too,” you whispered. 

“I’m sorry it took me so long to get back to you,” he said, his fingers still tracing the same familiar path along your skin. “I’ve got a lot of regrets in my life but that’s one of my biggest. I wasted so much time with you. Sometimes all I think about is all that time we missed out on because I was too wrapped up in my own shit…” 

“We found each other again,” you reached up and trailed your fingers through his shaggy curls. “That’s all that matters. We can’t change anything that happened to us then, we can only make sure we don’t lose each other again now.” 

“Not losing you again, baby,” Joel said, cupping your cheek and kissing you deeply. “Promise I’m not.” 

You looked in his eyes, something warm and needy settling low in your stomach as you did. 

“Let’s go inside,” he said, his tone matching the already building heat inside you. 

You just nodded and let him lead the way. 

*** 

Joel had been waiting for a night like this one. 

Maybe not one where Ellie was away quite so long. Her being gone overnight made him uneasy, even if it was just to the town lock-in down the street. 

But it did mean he got time alone with you, something he’d been craving more and more lately. 

It seemed like all he wanted to do, now that the three of you were safely settled in Jackson, was find a way to make up for lost time. 

He wasn’t sure he really could. He’d lost you for too long, done too much he regretted to ever really atone for it all. But he wanted to try. He desperately wanted to do something - anything - that would make himself worthy of you. 

Wonderful Tonight had been the first thing he tried to play when he’d gotten the guitar in Jackson. You’d been at the clinic, Ellie at school and he’d fumbled his way through it in the living room, his fingers hurting the entire time. It took time to rebuild the callus, to relearn the song. But it had been so worth it to see the look on your face when he’d played it for you on the porch that night. 

The two of you came in as the storm seemed to be reaching its peak, the rain pouring in a steady drumbeat on the roof, the thunder rattling the panes of glass in their frames as he led you to bed. 

He undressed you slowly, reverently, taking his time with you the way he’d imagined doing every time he imagined fucking you in those years in the QZ. He cast aside your shirt and his hands skimmed the outline of you, your skin so impossibly soft under his touch. He wondered - not for the first time - how something as soft as you could exist at all, let alone in this world. How something as soft as you could possibly be meant for him, want him. But you did and he lived to give you what you wanted, that’s all that mattered. 

You tugged at his shirt and he helped you remove it before he unhooked your bra and cast it aside, too, drinking in the sight of your bared skin before him. 

“Christ, baby,” he breathed, pulling you against his naked chest. You pressed your soft, warm skin against him, your arms wrapping around his neck and he guided you to the bed, laying you below him in the middle of it. When he pulled away from you, you whined, your eyes following his every movement. He smiled a little. “Ain’t gonna get far with these still on, I’m comin’ right back.” 

He unbuttoned your jeans and hooked his fingers around the waistband of those and your panties, pulling both down your legs at once, leaving you completely bare before him. 

“Joel,” you whimpered, your hands finding your breasts by what seemed like their own accord, desperate to hold onto something. You worked them gently as you watched him unbutton his own jeans, biting your lower lip as you did. 

“Fuck, you keep right on doin’ that,” he damn near growled as he shucked his own jeans and underwear before crawling up the bed toward you and settling in the cradle of your hips. “So pretty when you’re making yourself feel good…” 

He licked his fingertips and slid his hand down your body to the apex of your thighs, finding your swollen bud and pressing against it. Your back arched and you whined again as he started working your clit in slow, firm circles. 

“Even prettier when you let me do it, though,” he said, his unoccupied hand going to the crown of your head, toying with your hair before he kissed you deeply. 

Your hands left your breasts then, finding his back and pulling him sharply toward yourself, as though you couldn’t get enough of him. You rocked your hips up against him and he smiled against your lips, his cock swollen and painfully hard. 

“Joel,” you panted when he pulled back. “I need you, please, I need you, I need you…” 

“Need me where?” He asked, breathless himself. 

He knew where. 

He just wanted to hear you say it. 

“Inside,” your eyes were wide, pupils blown. “Inside me, please, I need you inside me.” 

His hand left your slick slit and he stroked his cock once with your wetness, the heat of you so close to him. 

“Then let me give you what you want,” he said, lining himself up with your entrance and pressing inside you with a deep groan of satisfaction. 

He sank into you, feeling your walls parting for his intrusion, how your body shifted and molded to him, your pussy holding him perfectly. 

Every time he did this, every time he first entered you, he had the same two thoughts: this was where he belonged, this was so much more than he deserved. 

He’d had a hard time reconciling those things. Since he’d met you, he couldn’t shake the idea that he needed to be alongside you - inside you - but he knew that you’d been meant for something more than him. When you were both young, you’d been so full of potential, all brilliant light that it seemed selfish to focus it all on himself. Now, you were the warmest comfort, the most beautiful part of a ruined world. With all he’d done, all the ways he’d failed, he could not deserve you. 

He’d let that keep you apart for a long time, the clash of those feelings pulling at him. But now, he knew how they fit, how he fit with you. He had to try to be worthy of you, that was the key. He could not stop, could not wavier. He had to always try. He had to hold you, protect you, bring you the CDs you adored and paint the walls the colors you loved and find ways to make the things that brought you joy because someone like you needed someone who would try for them. In this world there was no sure thing, but he could try. For you, he would try for the rest of his life. 

He moved in you slowly at first, savoring the way your skin felt against his, the way your fingers twisted in his hair. But you were both too desperate and needy to take it slow for long, his pace increasing with the steady motion of your hips and the aching clutch of your fingers as you grew tighter and tighter around him. 

“You’re so close to coming for me,” he all but growled, voice heavy with need. You whined and nodded against him. “Don’t have anyone here to wake up, want to hear you baby. Don’t hold back for me, let me hear you, want to hear you when I come inside you.” 

You whimpered again, louder this time, your fingers scrambling for purchase on his skin, the wet snap of his hips into yours obscene and only bringing him closer to the peak. 

He felt you tighten, your whole body clinging to him for a moment - not even breathing - before you called his name and gasped as your core fluttered around him. 

Joel stayed buried deep inside you where he belonged, grinding his hips down against you as you came, your pulsing pulling his own orgasm from him as he emptied himself into you with a moan. 

After, you tucked yourself against his side, both of your bodies sticky with sweat and your shared spend and neither of you caring. 

“Didn’t even need a door this time,” you teased lightly. 

Joel laughed once. 

“Still appreciate them though,” he teased back. 

The two of you were quiet for a moment and he held you close, thinking not of all the years he’d lost with you but all the ones he had ahead. He kissed the crown of your head and you snuggled closer as he smiled against your hair. 

“I love you, Joel,” you said softly, your fingers splaying wide over his chest. “I’m so glad we found each other.” 

“Me too, baby,” he whispered, holding you closer. “Me too.” 

[padfootagain]

Something Good (XXV)

Chapter 25 : Mending

Alright, here is the end of the crisis!

Hope you like this new chapter, tell me what you think!

****

Pairing: Ben Barnes x Reader

Warnings: Fluff angst, Slow burn, professor AU.!

Summary: Coming out of a divorce and trying to get used to being a single mom, while teaching your classes at University, you thought your life could not get more complicated than it already is. But when you are asked to take care of the theatre club with the colleague that you really can’t get along with, you realize that everything can still get ten times more complicated in your life. And when you start actually liking Professor Barnes, the troubles only grow exponentially…

Word Count: 3950

Masterlist for the series – Ben Barnes’ Masterlist – Main Masterlist

It was past midnight when you called Ben. Sally was finally asleep, even if she was still upset when she surrendered to slumber. She refused to tell you why she was so upset about all this, and you didn’t want to push her. Ben had left a couple of hours ago, you had argued that you needed to handle your daughter on your own. And if he had claimed to understand, he was still worried sick when he put on his coat and left for the night.

“Is Sally asleep?” he sounded tired, but you had no doubt that he was still wide awake when you called.

“Yeah. She’s still upset though.”

“Did she say anything?”

“Nothing… I don’t know… I thought she could have questions, that she might be a little stressed for a while. But I wasn’t expecting a full-on outburst like this.”

“Yeah, me neither. I don’t understand, I thought… I thought she liked having me around.”

“She did. She talked about you all the time.”

“I don’t understand what we did wrong. Do you think we should have just… shown her. Like hold hands and stuff?”

“She would have asked herself questions, it might have stressed her a lot.”

Ben heaved a sigh.

“What are we going to do now?”

You remained silent, feeling tears come to your eyes again. And on the other side of town, Ben was wiping his cheeks.

“I don’t want to lose you,” he confessed in a breath. “I know that you’ll take the decision that will be best for Sally, and I’ll never blame you for that. But I don’t want to lose you, Y/N. Can we… can we try to fix this before I have to be pushed away?”

Your voice was low and raspy when you answered.

“Of course, Ben. We’ll talk to Sally again. First, we need to figure out what got her so upset. I’ve never seen her like that. And we’ll try to fix this. I… I don’t want to lose either. I won’t leave unless there is truly nothing else that we can do.”

“Thank you.”

“I’ll try to talk to her tomorrow. You can come see us in the afternoon, as planned.”

“You’re sure it’s a good idea?”

“Yeah. We need to try again. Together.”

“Alright. Do you think I have a chance to bribe her if I bring ice cream?”

You chuckled at that, feeling a little better thanks to him and his soothing voice.

“It might not be enough, but it won’t hurt.”

Sally was staring by the window at the falling rain.

She had barely spoken a word in the whole morning, which was threateningly unusual for your buoyant girl.

You looked at her tiny frame, at her Stitch t-shirt and the mess of her hair. How could such a tiny human hold so much love and space in your heart?

“Sally, do you want to prepare the pasta sauce with me?”

But she shook her head, eyes still fixed on the blurred world beyond the window. You heaved a sigh, walking closer.

You had left her alone this morning, thinking that she would need some time to process what had happened. But she was still cold and distant and just… apathetic. She was like that when her father left…

“Angel, about what Ben and I told you last night…”

But she turned further away from you, a silent way to show you that she didn’t want to talk about this. It needed to be done, though.

“Angel, you know I love you more than anything in this world,” you went on, voice soothing but with a tinge of vulnerability through a tremor. “Ben and I being together… it won’t change anything. It won’t change that. Nothing can ever change that.”

You reached for her, and Sally didn’t push you away when you ran your fingers through her hair.

“I thought you liked Ben.”

“I did,” the girl quipped.

“But?”

“But I don’t want that. Why do you want that?”

You held her against you, and she let you gently press her head to your stomach.

“Because he makes me happy. Because he’s kind, and he’s willing to take care of us. Because he’s taking good care of you. Because I trust him. And because he’s sillier than me, so you and I can team up against him and make fun of him.”

Sally chuckled at that, and you grinned at the sound, still running your fingers through her hair.

“I don’t want things to change again,” Sally said, breaking your heart.

You remembered the mess you were in after your break up with your ex-husband. You were just now finding your footing in all of this. And despite your best efforts to protect your daughter, no one could leave such a change unscathed.

“I understand. But that’s what life is, Sally. Things change all the time. And sometimes, they change for the better. We have to seize those when we can.”

She finally turned around to encircle you in her tiny arms, pressing her face into your belly.

“Will we still have tomato Tuesday?” she asked, her voice muffled in your clothing, and you chuckled fondly at her.

“Of course! And we’ll still see grandma every Thursday. You’ll still go to your dad’s the same. We’ll still do the same things, only… if you want, Ben can join us too.”

She didn’t say anything, and you didn’t push her. A few minutes later, the doorbell rang, and you went to open for Ben.

He gave you a warm smile, although the dark circles under his eyes betrayed his worry and lack of sleep.

“Hey. Brought ice-cream, as promised!” he said, showing you his bag, making you smile.

You kissed him before he could take off his coat, letting his soothing presence slow your heart as you breathed in his perfume.

“Hi, meerkat!” Ben greeted your daughter as he took off his shoes, the same warm smile on his lips.

She was looking at him with an unreadable expression, her bunny Mr. Carrot pressed against her heart.

“How are you today? I’ve brought ice-cream for dessert!”

But she didn’t say anything, merely looked at you and Ben with wide eyes, and she ran off before you could hold her back.

You could feel your throat tightening as you stared at the space Sally had just left empty, tears coming back to your eyes, but Ben’s hand on your arm made you turn to him at last.

“I’ll go talk to her.”

“I’m not sure it’s a good idea.”

“I’m the problem. I need to fix this.”

He didn’t let you reply. He knew that you would claim that he wasn’t a problem, but he was. He was always the problem. He was never enough…

Ben strode to Sally’s door instead, leaving you behind. The door had been left open, but he knocked anyway. She was sitting on her bed, looking at Mr. Carrot as if her plushie held the answers to everything. And Ben wished it could be that simple…

“Hey… can I come in and talk with you for a second?”

Sally didn’t look up, but she nodded, and so Ben came to sit beside her.

When he spoke again, his voice was gentle, barely more than a whisper.

“Look, Sally… I understand that it might seem like a lot to take in, and I get that you might need time to wrap your mind around all this. But… you were very upset yesterday, and you seem to still be. Can you tell me why you’re so upset? So we can try to fix that?”

She slowly looked up at Ben, with those eyes that looked just like yours now drowning in tears. Her lips trembled, and Ben wanted to abandon everything. As long as Sally could stop being sad, he would have done anything…

“You can tell me. You need to tell me,” Ben went on, blinking his own tears away. “Because… if you don’t tell me, then I can’t make it better. Do you understand? I need to know what’s wrong to make it better again.”

She went back to looking at her bunny, but she spoke this time. Voice a little hoarse, but holding the blunt honesty of childhood.

“I don’t want you to be with mummy like that.”

Ben’s heart broke in a thousand pieces. Still, he nodded, dried his cheeks with the back of his hand as he sniffed.

“Why not? What bothers you so much about that?”

She vehemently shook her head and started crying again.

“I don’t want a new dad!”

Ben frowned at that.

“I don’t want not to see my dad!”

“Sally, of course you’ll see your dad…”

“Jeremy… at school he said… that his mummy had a new husband, and then he never saw his daddy again… I want my daddy!”

“Hey… hey…”

Ben dropped to the floor, kneeling before the crying child, and held her face in his gentle palms so she would look at him, drying her cheeks.

“Hey… what are you talking about, huh? No one is going to replace your dad. You already have a dad, you don’t need another one. And you’ll keep seeing him, just like you do now. I don’t want to be your dad. I’m just ‘Ben’.”

“But then, what will you be?”

Ben blinked, taken aback and looking for the right words. What would he be if this worked out? If he could stay with you? If he was pulled into your life? If he stayed?

He smiled.

“You know what… I would be very happy if in a few years I could be… like your uncle. But a cool uncle! A fun one! Cause I’m super cool!”

He made a funny face, making her giggle.

“You’re not so cool,” she replied, and he faked outrage.

“How dare you! I’m super cool! I’ve brought ice-cream!”

But she blinked, and looked at her plushie again.

“So… you’re not gonna take daddy away?”

“Of course not, meerkat. No one is going to take your dad away. I’ll be whatever you allow me to be to you, and nothing more.”

He gave her an encouraging smile, and he thought the look in her eyes was calmer now. But she stood without warning, and headed to the living room in search for you.

“Mummy… I want to go see daddy.”

You looked at her in surprise.

“Right now, angel?”

“Yes. I want daddy.”

You heaved a sigh, picked up your phone. That wasn’t a good sign. But if she wanted to see her father to process all this, then so be it. You couldn’t say no, anyway. She was too upset for you to refuse her anything.

So, you grabbed your phone, threw a questioning glance at Ben but the distraught expression on his face spoke volumes. You listened to the beeps of the phone with a lump in your throat.

He answered on the second call.

“Everything alright, Y/N?” he asked in a neutral tone.

“Hey, Liam. Yeah, huh… Sally wants to see you, can we drop by?”

“Now? It’s not my week.”

“I know, but she wants to see you.”

“I’m working right now… can we talk over the phone? I thought we had agreed that we needed to respect the planning.”

“No, she…”

You turned around and lowered your voice to hide your words from your daughter.

“Ben and I talked to her, and she’s upset. She’s asking for you. I think… I think she doesn’t want to see me, right now.”

You hated the hurt in your voice that you couldn’t quieten, and you hated even more Liam’s silence.

“Can she come?” you asked again.

“Of course, I’ll be here in twenty.”

“I can drop her to your place…”

“No, I’ll pick her up. You’ve done enough as it is.”

He hung up, leaving you shocked with the violence of his words.

“Is daddy coming?”

You blinked your tears away, turning to Sally again and forcing a smile.

“Yeah, he’s coming. He’s leaving his flat right away, angel.”

She nodded, turned to go back to her room.

“I love you, angel.”

She slowed her steps, but didn’t turn around. As soon as she had disappeared, Ben walked over to you to hold you tight.

Liam was enraged at this point. That this Ben would try and take you away was one unbearable thing, but that he would hurt Sally in any way? He was ready to smash his skull.

As he pulled away by your home, he was already picturing himself punching Ben in the face. Breaking his fucking nose.

But then, you opened the door, all red eyes and dry lips and dishevelled hair. The looks you had when you separated. When he fucked up. The looks of sadness he had wished to never see again.

And it was this Ben’s fault…

“Daddy!”

“Angel! Come here!”

He picked up Sally without a word to you, or to Ben, who he had spotted by the end of the corridor, looking sheepish, the bastard. How dared he still be here? As if he hadn’t caused enough damage already.

“Where are your stuff, Sally? You want to sleep at daddy’s place tonight?”

The girl hesitated, looked at you.

“I don’t know. I just wanted to see you.”

“Well, let’s pack a bag, just in case. Come on.”

He walked to Sally’s bedroom without another word. Put down his daughter on her bed and shut the door.

“Alright, which pyjamas do you want? The rainbow ones? Or the pirates?”

“I don’t know.”

When he turned to her again, she opened her arms, silently asking to be picked up again, and he obliged. Holding her tight, in a reassuring, constant embrace to show her that he was here, that everything would be alright. That nothing bad would ever happen to her, he would make sure of it…

“Ben is mummy’s boyfriend,” she said in a tiny voice against his shoulder.

“I know. She told me.”

Silence for a while, even the air was still.

“How does that make you feel, angel?” he asked gently, rubbing her back.

“Scared.”

“Scared? Why?”

“Jeremy at school said that his mummy replaced his daddy. And that his daddy didn’t want to see him after that.”

Liam felt his heart shatter at her words. He looked into her eyes with something offended in his expression. Sally’s eyes, your eyes, the ones he adored above all in the world…

“Sally! Don’t be silly! I’m not going anywhere. I’ll always be here for you, angel.”

“But you weren’t sometimes.”

Liam clenched his jaw at that, but held her gaze despite the tears that gathered in his eyes. Your voice rang in his head then, your warnings that he had to prioritize his family over his work, that this was the important thing he needed to fight for. And that if he wasn’t careful, Sally would resent him later.

He forced a reassuring smile.

“Look, angel… It’s been a bit hard for me at one point. But I’m still here. I’ll always be here. I won’t leave you, angel. No one is going to push me away, or make me leave. Okay? I love you, more than anything. And it will always be the case.”

“So… if mummy and Ben are together, you won’t leave?”

“Of course, I won’t leave. And I won’t let Ben replace me, okay? Did he say that he wanted to replace me?”

“No,” Sally shook her head. “Mummy and Ben said the same thing. That you would always be my daddy. Ben said that… he would be happy if he could be a cool uncle.”

Liam nodded, unsure of his feelings at this answer.

“And… would you like that? For him to be a new uncle?”

Sally pondered the question for a while, holding Mr. Carrot close. And then she nodded.

“Yeah… He’s fun! I think he could be cool too! That could be nice.”

Liam nodded.

“No matter what happens between Ben and mummy, you’ll always be my little angel. Okay?”

She nodded, holding him tight for a while longer.

“Can I stay at mummy’s tonight?”

“You don’t want to come to daddy’s?”

“No… I like my bed here better.”

He laughed at how blunt she was, but nodded, kissing her hair, breathing in her cherry shampoo, his favourite scent in the world.

“Alright.”

“Are you angry because I made you come just for a little while?”

“No, you were upset. You can always call me when you’re upset. I’m you dad, that’s my job. It’s alright. Do you want to play for a bit before I leave? I can stay for the afternoon.”

“YES! Can we make tea for Mr. Carrot?”

“Sure thing! Get everything ready, I’ll talk to mummy for a moment, and then I’ll play with you.”

Sally was happier again, although she wasn’t fully back to her bubbly self. Liam left her to find you and Ben sitting in silence on the sofa. He was holding you close, his arm around your shoulders and your head on his chest. And Liam wanted to break everything in this room…

You blinked up at him as he entered, and then you were on your feet.

“Is everything alright?”

But Liam nodded, surprising even himself.

“She’s just scared, she’ll be alright.”

“She’s packing for tonight?”

“No, she wants to stay here. She just wanted me around. I’ll stay for the afternoon, we’re making tea for Mr. Carrot.”

“She hasn’t eaten lunch yet.”

“We’ll see about that later. I’d like to talk with Ben first. Let’s step outside.”

He didn’t wait for Ben’s approval, or yours. He merely strode towards the door, and waited then in the cold air. The rain had stopped, but the sky was still dark and threatening. The street was quiet, no one was around.

Ben remained silent stepping outside the building. He waited for Liam to speak first. And he wasn’t disappointed.

“Give me a reason not to punch you right now, Ben.”

But he didn’t rise to the provocation. Instead, he remained silent again, forcing Liam to turn towards him, at last.

And Liam hated what he saw. The dark circles over his cheekbones and the red in his eyes that told that Ben had been crying for hours, barely slept at all last night. The exhaustion on his face, the fear in his gaze, the worry in the lip he had bruised after biting on it too much. And Liam hated him because Ben was clearly not a bad guy. He loved you, it was obvious in every of his movements, all of his gazes aimed for you. And he cared, clearly. He was a good man, and Liam hated him for it, because now… why would he punch him in the face?

“Is Sally alright?” were the first words Ben spoke, voice hoarse with sorrow, and Liam’s hatred only deepened.

“She will be. She thought you would replace me.”

“I don’t want to replace you…”

“No?”

“Of course not. I’m not her father. You are.”

“And yet, you are taking my place.”

Ben narrowed his eyes, and Liam withstood the challenge. He was more hurt than he thought he would by Ben’s earnest words, though. They were lethal in his ear…

“I’m not the one who was stupid enough to let Y/N go.”

Liam let out a dry laugh.

“And you’re so much better than me?”

“No, probably not. But it’s not my fault if you’ve lost her. You’ve managed that on your own. You can’t blame me for falling for her. And you can’t blame her for loving me either…”

“You think she loves you?”

“I know she does.”

“Has she told you that?”

“Yes. And I’ve told her the same.”

Love… you couldn’t love another man… infatuation, perhaps, but…

“Look, Liam, I… I know that you don’t like me. And if I’m being honest, I don’t like you either, so we’re even. But I love Y/N. And I love Sally. And I don’t want to hurt them in any way. And I don’t want to replace you, I’m not Sally’s father, and she doesn’t need me, she needs you. I’m well aware of that…”

“But if you settle with Y/N what will you do? If the two of you have children, will you push her away?”

“God, we’re not there yet…”

“But if you are?”

“Of course not. She has a father, and the best I can be for her is some weird uncle figure. And I’ll be more than happy if I can be that for her. She loves you as a father. It doesn’t mean that I can’t love her as a daughter.”

Ben shook his head, heaving a sigh, pinching the bridge of his glasses before pushing them up his nose.

“Liam, if we manage to do this, if… Sally accepts me enough for me and Y/N to be together… we can’t be enemies. I don’t like you, you don’t like me, but we can’t show it. Can we call a truce?”

He offered Liam his hand, but he didn’t take it. Instead, he walked past Ben, bumped into his shoulder for good measure, and went back to his daughter, walking before his wife.

Ex-wife.

God, he hated Ben. He hated all this.

Still, as he settled with Sally to play, he was smiling, and gentle, and when she asked about next weekend, he reassured her about their plans to go to the museum, and promised her nothing would change between them and that everything would be alright…

Ben gave Sally and you some space during the following week. He didn’t drop by after Liam’s visit, arguing that Sally needed time to think and process what was happening. You tried to argue, because you missed him; but not too much, because you agreed.

Still, after over a week, on Monday evening, Sally spoke about Ben again for the first time.

“Why is Ben not coming anymore?”

“He was just busy. And we thought that perhaps you didn’t want to see him that much…”

She nodded over her bowl of soup, but frowned when she looked up at you again.

“Daddy said he was always going to be here, and Ben said he wanted to be my cool uncle.”

You couldn’t refrain a chuckle at that.

“A cool uncle… that sounds nice. Not sure he can be cool though.”

“He is cool, I think.”

You hummed in agreement, swallowing some soup.

“Can we invite him to tomato Tuesday tomorrow?”

You blinked away your tears at your daughter’s words.

“Sure. You want to call him to ask him if he wants to come?”

“Yes!”

You grabbed your phone, and called, not waiting for the end of the meal. You usually didn’t interrupt dinner, but you were too happy to wait…

Ben grinned as he saw you and Sally appear on the screen.

“Hello, ladies!”

“Hi, Ben! Sally wanted to invite you to tomato Tuesday tomorrow, do you want to come?”

Your heart was warm and full as you noticed that he was blinking tears away.

“Of course! I’d love to! Thanks, meerkat!”

“But, Ben! This is serious business!” Sally warned him. “Because on tomato Tuesday, we make the BEST pasta sauce in the world!”

“The best, really?”

“Yes! So you have to peel the tomato, and then have to boil, and to smash and mummy won’t let you eat any piece of tomato, because she’s mean… and…”

And Sally babbled away about tomato sauce, and the pasta that you cooked every Tuesday with her.

And perhaps things would be okay, after all…

***********************************************

Taglist: @reg-arcturus-black @sergeantbuckybarnes @wolfmoonmusic @idek-what-to-put @kpicard @rhapsodyonthethames @friendly-philosopher @squirreljoe

[yanderemommabean]

Victoria Jenifers Body AU Drabble

((Hiya! I made a little short involving my oc Victoria with the Jenifers Body AU, I hope you like it beans! ))

Victoria hasn’t been the same since that night you two went out. She left in a weird van and came back more cold, and seemingly off. You brushed it off as just your friend being stressed and being her typical bitchy self, but this was too different.

She wasn’t just bitchy and catty, she was cold hearted and bitter. Not towards you, but towards everyone else on campus who she used to fawn over and even crush on. The girls she used to gush to you about are hardly ever brought up anymore and she’s always behind you, hovering, like she doesn’t like the others talking to you.

Sending her a text, you flop in your bed and try to dry the tears on your face. Another person was declared missing and possibly dead, and the whole town was beginning to believe it was the work of a serial killer. You knew him, he wouldn’t hurt anyone and was genuinely a good guy to be around, and it broke your heart that he possibly met the fate of the others.

The killer didn’t seem to have a preference, woman, man, good, bad, they all went missing. The only real lead was they all seemed to have been around the campus or close by, such as at the stores or gas stations. It was seriously stressing you out and you needed Victoria to be there, even if she’s been off and maybe won’t be able to comfort you entirely.

“Oh…poor sweet little thing” Her voice purrs, coming up from behind you and making your body jump. You weren’t expecting her to get here that fast, let alone so quietly. She has a key to your place and everything so why didn’t you hear even the slightest jiggle of the knob or shake of the keys?

Doesn’t matter, you’re upset and you feel so confused and dare you say, isolated. She hardly tells you anything anymore, and during a scary time like this, you need someone who’s open. It might be a good time to bring up what’s been going on not just on the news, but between the two of you as well.

“Something on your mind?” She asks softly, her hand coming to touch your cheek and feel the warm tears still drying on them. Her eyes flashes something cold and sinister for just a second, but you chalk that up to you just being paranoid. “Who made you cry like this? You can tell me. We’re best friends after all”.

You tense, sitting up as you gently shove her away. Her being that close didn’t feel normal anymore. It felt more smothering than it did anything else. “You did, Vic. You…you don’t talk to me anymore. You don’t hang out with anyone like you used too, you barely let me know when you’re doing anything and I feel so left out of the loop! And on top of all of that, when you DO tell me where you are, it’s late at night while a killer’s on the loose!”

The blonde doesn’t say a word, simply staring at you. Fuck it. You can’t stop the tears from falling anyway, and you deserve to know what’s happening!

“If it’s about that stupid drunken kiss we did, I’m sorry! I didn’t want to ever push that boundary! We were just drunk and we can call it a mistake! We don’t have to put up walls and- and- and-“ you start stuttering, breathes shaky and uneven as you spew your feelings out like a child.

You were scared. Scared of losing your closest friend and it being all your fault.

Lost in your own emotions, you feel her yank you closer, hand in your hair as she forces you to face her. You wince as her grip tightens, eyes watery as they stare into hers, silence filling the room. Victorias lips come to press behind your ear as she whispers into it, her other hand circling your wrist as she speaks.

“You’ll understand why I’m doing this. Right now just isn’t the time” she breathes, then nudges the bridge of her nose into your hair to inhale, shoulders relaxing as she indulges in your scent. “You’re a smart girl. I know you’ve seen the shady things as of late. Tell me, pretty girl, why is it when everyone goes missing, I’m the last person they’re often seen with?”.

Your breath gets caught in your throat, eyes widening in horror. Was she really saying what you thought she was? Was she the one who left horrible bloody heaps for the police to find every night?

Her hand comes to slide under your shirt, rubbing your back as she toys with your bra. She smirks at the way you tense and jump, unable to escape her hold as she uses more strength. “Those sweet lips on mine, that night, was a gift I couldn’t imagine handling at the time. When I left with those people…they turned me into something that could. A stronger, smarter, better version of my old self, so I could give you everything you deserved”.

“You’re a killer!”

“Only in the sense of protecting what’s mine at any cost”

“They were innocent!”

“They were trying to take you away from me.” She says coldly, her teeth bared in a snarl as she holds you against her body. You begin to cry once again, this time thinking you were about to meet the same fate as the others. If she was about to kill you, all you ask is that she made it quick.

“You still think I’m human. It’s sweet, really” her voice sounded amused, her hand coming to slide over your stomach and feel the heated skin. “That stupid group turned me into something better. And now…I get to eat the things who get in my way, or try to hurt what’s mine. I guess I’ve been too busy on protecting you that I left you so neglected “ she says with a fake pout to her voice.

Her other hand comes to trace up your neck, wiping away the trail of tears as she feels your pulse under her fingertips. “My poor, needy little Y/N. You must feel like I don’t love you at all, tsk tsk tsk. I’ll have to fix that. But-“ her lips come to tease at your ear again, wicked smile gracing her features as she whispers “I’m going to give you a lot more than just shy little kisses. I’m going to devour you”.

((-Mommabean))

[steddiecameraroll]

They Keep (Just) Missing

ao3

Rating: M - WC: 13,760 - AU Modern, Angst with a Happy Ending, miscommunication galore, four times they should’ve kissed but didn’t, and one time they finally do.

First Time

“What are you doing here, Steve?” Eddie stares at the man standing before him.

“I came with Robin?” Steve doesn’t understand the hostility being daggered at him.

Eddie shoves his hands in his pockets and tries calming his breathing. It’s been a few years since Eddie’s laid eyes on the slender, ever-beautiful man across from him. The hallway of this very small, very smelly, cramped bar wasn’t making it any more comfortable.

“You ok, man?” Steve takes a cautious step forward.

“Yeah, uh sorry, thought I was seeing a ghost.” Eddie runs his hand over his face trying to remove the clear emotions from his expression. “It’s good to see you.” Eddie tries to lift his tone to pretend he isn’t nervous as fuck.

“Yeah, you too, man. Glad to see you’re still with the band. That’s cool.” Steve leans casually against the wall and crosses his arms.

Eddie’s stomach flutters at how gorgeous Steve looks. He has a little bit of stubble gracing his jawline and is wearing a tight white crew neck shirt under an unbuttoned yellow dress shirt covered by an oversized denim jacket. Eddie has to bite his cheek to keep his eyes from raking over Steve’s body.

“Yeah, still plugging along. Things are picking up, though. It’s been fun. Glad you’re here. So you’re in town then?” Eddie nervously finds his chain wallet hanging from his side and starts rubbing his thumb over the clip attached to his belt loop.

“Yeah, for Thanksgiving. Joyce invited me down, and I didn’t have anything else going on, so I thought I’d accept.” Steve watches Eddie carefully. He’s trying to understand the mood happening between them.

Eddie seems nervous, and Steve can’t understand why. When Steve left Hawkins about three years earlier, their relationship could be defined as friends, they’d gotten closer, but it wasn’t like they were best friends or anything. Steve didn’t keep in touch, but neither did Eddie. It felt like their friendship faded to what it was meant to be, just casual acquaintances. When someone would bring up the other one, they would smile and listen all about what was going on, like a fondness for a past life, but that was it.

“Oh right, the whole reunion of sorts. Very cool, um, maybe I’ll see you there.” Eddie needs to return to the band but can’t pull away. He wants to soak up every possible second with Steve because he knows he won’t get to see him again, and it’s been a while since he’s recharged his Steve fix.

“For sure, uh, do you need to get ready?” Steve makes a motion with his thumb back behind him down the hallway.

“Right, yeah.” Eddie looks behind Steve and sees Robin heading down the hallway toward them.

“Eddie! Oh my god, I’m so excited for tonight. Look who joined me,” Robin puts her hand on Steve’s shoulder and gives him a little shake.

“Yeah, yeah, I see that. You didn’t tell me.” Eddie narrows his eyes at her, trying to communicate silently.

“It was a surprise,” she widens her eyes and leans forward.

“Sure fucking was,” Eddie’s fake smile starts to slip.

Steve’s picking up on something between them and turns to look at Robin with his brows furrowed.

“What’s going on?” 

“Oh, nothing,” Robin beams at him and then turns back to Eddie. “Gareth was looking for you.”

“Right, yeah, so I gotta find him. Glad you’re here, Steve. Good to see you.” Eddie heads down the hallway and bumps into Robin purposefully. “I’ll talk to you later.”

*****

“I thought you’d be happy to see him,” Robin admits to Eddie after he cornered her by the bar.

“Uh, sure, but maybe a warning would’ve been nice. Now I’m fucking nervous as shit and gonna fuck up this whole show.”

“Don’t you think you’re being dramatic?” Robin crosses her arms and leans against the bar top.

“No, no I don’t. He looks so fucking hot, and I hate you for that.” Eddie doesn’t feel Steve coming up behind him, and it’s too late for Robin to warn him.

“Who does?” Steve slides in by Robin.

“Uh,” Eddie almost chokes on his tongue, trying to find a responsible answer.

“One of the bartenders.” Robin butts in and gives Eddie a tight-lipped look.

“Yeah, yeah,” Eddie quickly agrees.

“Oh, who is it?” Steve starts looking around.

“He’s in the back.” Eddie tries to cover it up.

“Point him out when he comes back. I wanna know the kind of guy Eddie Munson thinks is hot.” Steve found out Eddie was gay years ago and, to Eddie’s relief, was just as fine with it as he was with Robin.

“Uh, ok?

“Have you asked him out?” Steve grins wide.

“No, no, I don’t think he likes me.” Eddie keeps looking at Robin, seeking assistance.

“Y-yeah, he’s still feeling it out,” Robin adds, hoping to help.

“So, the idea is to feel it out? See if he’s into guys too?” 

Eddie nods, “mhm.”

“Are there like signs or something to look out for?” Steve looks between Eddie and Robin.

“Flirting, flirting is one.” Robin points out.

“I know flirting,” Steve wiggles his shoulders.

“No, you don’t, dingus.” Robin scrunches her face at him.

“Shut up, yes I do.” Steve crosses his arms.

“While you two argue about that, I’ve gotta go.” He grabs his beer from the bar, nods at the bartender, and walks up towards the stage.

“So point him out, ok?” Steve says to Robin.

“Who?”

“The bartender.” Steve reminds her.

“Oh, oh yeah. I’ll see if he’s still here.” 

“What does he look like?” Steve starts looking around the room.

“Why are you so interested?” Robin tilts her head at him.

“I just, I don’t know, was curious what his type was like,” Steve replies, flustered.

“You wanna know his type?”

“Sure, why not?”

“I don’t know.”

“So what is it?”

“Dorks,” she rolls her eyes.

“Like nerds? I mean, I guess that makes sense.”

“No, no, not nerds, but giant idiots. Who usually can’t get their shit together and are oblivious to reality.” Robin doesn’t even try to hide it.

“Ok, that doesn’t really help.”

Robin rolls her eyes, takes her drink from the bar, and walks toward the stage.

“Just tell me. What does he look like?” Steve follows close to her.

“You seem interested in the kind of guy Eddie wants to bang, dingus.” Robin takes a sip and gives him a suggestive glance.

“No, pfft, I was…I was just curious.” Steve lifts his beer to his mouth and stares at the ceiling avoiding eye contact.

Robin pointedly turns and faces Steve. “He has a type. His type is a little Ryan Reynolds-like, probably a jock or was one in high school. Tall, prefers brunettes. Likes a man in tight jeans. I hate it. When we hang out, he’s always comparing every dude to this one guy, and it makes me want to sock him in the mouth. He won’t shut up about him, and it’s been fucking years.”

“Years?” Steve furrows his brows.

“Yeah, years.” She runs her eyes over him and then sighs and turns back to the stage, taking another sip of her drink.

“Wait, years? So do I know him? Who is it?” Steve starts wracking his brain through everyone from school. Steve must know him if he likes guys that are into sports. Unless he played baseball, Steve wasn’t on the baseball team. Although he could’ve because those little league games and his bat-swinging skills were monster-killing worthy.

Robin doesn’t reply but rolls her eyes again and is relieved when the lights turn down and the crowd starts cheering.

The other band members of Corroded Coffin come spilling onto the stage, waving to a few people in the crowd and getting themselves situated with their instruments. After a long beat, Eddie steps out of the darkness to a spattering of hoots and hollers, gives a wicked grin to the crowd, and grabs his guitar from the stand, slinging it over his shoulder.

“Hey, we’re Corroded Coffin, and I hope you’re ready for a life-altering dick-tingling experience tonight.” Eddie catches Steve’s eyes at the end of the sentence and sends him a flirty wink. He always feels more confident on stage.

The crowd cheers and hangs off every word. Steve starts understanding how rock stars can be worshipped. The way the spotlight frames Eddie’s face creates a halo glow in Eddie’s hair and brings a sparkle to his brown eyes. Steve thinks he looks utterly celestial.

The band played one of the best sets they’ve had in months. Whatever the fear and nervousness Eddie felt with Steve being there, he channeled and pushed himself through to perform his best version. When they were finished, Eddie was dripping in sweat, exhausted but running on excitement and adrenaline. The band started unhooking their instruments and heading off stage to the back, letting the next band set up.

“Can we go back there?” Steve asked Robin.

“Backstage?”

“Yeah, y’know, just to tell him… them that they did a good job?” Steve’s body was buzzing with the show’s after-effects.

“You wanna go back and tell Eddie he did a good job?” Robin asks teasingly.

“Shut up, never mind.” 

“Come on,” Robin grabs Steve’s hand and pulls him to the back door.

No one stops them or confronts them, and Steve is surprised at how simple it is for anyone to walk to the back.

“Munson, you have a new groupie.” Robin shoves open the door to an office, and the band is mingling around in the room.

“Rob! Oh do I?” Eddie turns to the door while wiping his face off with a hand towel. When he pulls the towel down, his eyes meet Steve’s, and his stomach drops at the look he’s giving him. “Steve,” he swallows hard and tries to pull himself together quickly. “You gonna come on tour with us and hang out in the bus dressed in almost nothing, with your tits hanging out?”

Steve’s mouth goes dry as he feels Eddie’s eyes look over his body as if Eddie is thinking about Steve wearing an outfit like he’s describing.

“I’m gonna get another drink.” Robin leaves the room, pretty sure neither of the boys heard her.

Eddie moves closer to Steve, and Steve feels like he’s prey and Eddie is stalking him. It sends a chill down Steve’s spine straight past his shoulders to his hips.

“Yeah, you’d like that wouldn’t you?” Steve crosses his arms and cocks an eyebrow at Eddie.

“Maybe,” Eddie winks and then turns back, wrapping the towel around his neck and grabbing a bottle of water. “Enjoy the show, Harrington?”

While Eddie is turned away, Steve takes in the man’s form and lets his eyes rake over his entire body.

Has Eddie always been this sexy? Shit. 

“Uh yeah,” Steve clears his throat and diverts his gaze. “It was great. Glad I was here for it.” Steve tries to sound as casual as possible.

Eddie turns to Steve and leans his hand on a nearby table, shifting his body weight and casually leaning on one foot. Steve tries to ignore the shudder rolling through him at the view.

“What are you doing later, Harrington? There’s an after-party at Gareth’s. You should come.” Eddie is trying to hold onto the confidence being on stage brings him.

“Uh, yeah, sure.”

Eddie puts his hand out, “give me your phone.” 

Steve’s stomach drops, and he pulls his cell out from his back pocket and moves closer to Eddie, handing him his phone. Steve can smell sweat, cigarettes, and something faintly amber and musky coming from Eddie. When Eddie finishes, he glances up at Steve and offers the phone back.

“Now you have my number. I’ll text you the address. See you later, Stevie.” Eddie presses his tongue to the tip of his tooth while grinning wickedly at Steve.

Steve can’t find his voice and nods. His hand is tingling, and he wants to look at his phone, but he waits until he steps out of the room. Pulling the door shut behind him, he leans against it and sighs loudly. He looks down at the screen and swipes it open, seeing the last screen appear and the text Eddie sent to himself.

Favorite Metalhead ❤ 

Steve: I’ve never told you this before, but I think you’re the sexiest guitar player in the entire world 

“What are you smiling at, dingus?” Robin appears holding two drinks and hands one to Steve.

“Oh, nothing.” Steve clicks his screen off and slides his phone into his back pocket. “Eddie invited us to the after-party. Wanna go?” 

“Shit, can’t. I have the opening shift tomorrow. This show was late enough. I can’t be up until 3 am. But you should definitely go.” She clinks her drink against his and gives him a goofy smile.

“Yeah, it’ll be fun. Hang out with Eddie for a while.” Steve feels his phone buzz in his pocket, making him jump a little.

“Uh, you ok?” Robin looks at him, concerned.

“My phone just buzzed. It scared me.”

“Let’s go back out, finish this drink, and listen to this last band. Then I’m gonna go home.” Robin starts walking to the main area, and Steve pulls his phone out and slides it open.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: why Stevie, I had no idea you were so obsessed with me 

Steve bites back a wide grin and shoots off a quick reply.

Steve: In your dreams, Munson 

Steve sees the bubble appear that Eddie’s already replying.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: you hanging out in my dreams? 

Steve: I don’t know what goes on in that head. It’s probably safer to stay out of there. 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: for you? definitely. but I don’t know what you’re into. you might like it 

Steve doesn’t realize he’s grinning at his phone when Robin looks back at him.

“Ok, who is it? You keep smiling at your phone.” She leans over, trying to read who’s on the screen, and Steve tilts it away from her view.

“No one, just reading something.” He clicks the screen off and slides his phone back into his back pocket.

******

Steve: You already leave? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: yep, bout 5 min ago. you ditching our date? 

Steve: I didn’t realize this was a date. Would’ve worn something nicer 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: you looked nice enough to me 

Steve sighs and feels himself blush at the compliment. He doesn’t understand what’s happening but doesn’t want to stop.

Steve: You checking me out? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: like everyone else at the show 

Steve: No one was checking me out 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: you’re delusional, hurry up and get over here. i’m bored 

Steve: You’ve only been there 5 mins 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: that’s long enough 

Steve: Send me the address 

Steve clicks the link and pulls up the directions. Gareth’s house is only about 8 minutes away, and Steve’s relieved he drove separately from Robin. 

“You ready to get out of here?” Steve taps Robin’s shoulder.

“Yeah, this band sucks.” She sets her watered-down drink on the nearby bar top, and they head outside.

“Oh shit, my ears.” Steve rubs his palm against his ear, trying to pop it.

“Well, have fun at the party, and be safe. Take an Uber if you get fucked up.” Robin opens her arms, inviting Steve in for a hug.

“Yes, mom.” Steve squeezes his best friend tightly.

“Tell Eddie I said hi,” Robin winks at Steve and waves back at him.

Steve: I’m leaving now, see you in 10 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: can’t wait 

Steve: Sounds like you’re the one obsessed with me 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: in your dreams, Harrington 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: *my 

Steve pulls his keys out of his pocket and jumps into his car, following the directions through town. He parks down the street and can hear the thump of music floating through the air. When he gets to the door of the house, it’s cracked open, and he can hear many voices. He pushes the door open and looks around. There is smoke in the air, a mixture of marijuana and cigarettes pluming around. People are walking around with red Solo cups filled with something.

Steve: Where are you? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: i’m out back 

Steve walks through the living room and lets his instincts guide him in a direction he feels is toward the back. He steps into the kitchen, notices a sliding glass door to a backyard, and walks through the darkness.

“Steve!” Eddie’s voice calls for him from somewhere to his right.

Steve turns and squints to see a red glow coming from that direction. He assumes it’s Eddie and heads over to it. His eyes start to adjust to the darkness, and he sees Eddie sprawled out on a ratty chaise lounger holding a joint to his lips.

“Still look good, Stevie.” Eddie motions to Steve’s outfit.

“It’s just something I threw on.” Steve runs his hand down his shirt and sits on the equally ratty chaise next to Eddie. “Why you out here alone?”

“Waiting for you.” Eddie offers the joint over to Steve.

Steve takes it and leans back in the chaise, looking up at the stars glowing above them. He wraps his lips gently around the paper and takes a pull, holding the smoke in his mouth for a second, then easily sucks in and holds it again, then slowly releases the smoke into the sky. Eddie watches in awe.

“Here,” Steve offers Eddie the joint back.

“Do you smoke?”

“I got my med card a while ago.” Steve sighs and enjoys the weed slowly spreading through his veins. “Anxiety, nightmares, I’m a fucking mess.”

“Shit, I’m impressed.” Eddie takes another hit off the joint and then passes it back to Steve.

“You sounded really good tonight.”

“Thanks, man. Yeah, we’re finally getting our groove.”

The two pass the joint back and forth as they continue their casual conversation. Once they’ve finished up, Steve notices Eddie’s shivering.

“Why didn’t you wear a real jacket? It’s November, dude.” 

“My leather jacket is real. Shut up.” Eddie wraps his arms around himself, trying to warm up.

“My jacket is toasty. Mmmmm, so warm over here.” Steve antagonizes Eddie playfully.

“Don’t rub it in, Stevie. I shared my weed with you.”

“Come over here, man. I’ll keep you warm.” Steve slides over on the lounger and pats the small space next to him.

“Fuck, ok.” Eddie jumps off his seat and onto Steve’s, casually flinging his body over Steve’s. He wraps his leg around Steve and then slides his hand inside Steve’s jacket across his chest. His head curls onto Steve’s chest, and his whole body shakes.

“Your hand is fucking cold.” Steve curls his arms around Eddie, pulling him closer.

“You need to warm it up.” Eddie casually slides his hand up under Steve’s shirt.

“FUCK, dude, not cool.” Steve jolts at Eddie’s cold touch.

“Shhh, just your skin will warm me faster.” Eddie nuzzles closer into Steve.

Steve doesn’t know if it’s the weed, the alcohol from earlier, or Eddie being this close to him, but he’s in heaven. He shifts his body and turns a little. Eddie’s leg slides further between Steve’s, and their bodies face closer together. Eddie’s face is now just below Steve’s. Steve opens his jacket and tries to wrap it around Eddie’s body.

Eddie’s hand slides around Steve’s body and presses against his back, still under the shirt.

“It’s probably warmer inside.” Steve mumbles.

“You wanna go inside, Harrington?” Eddie looks up, and Steve’s stomach flutters.

Shit 

“No,” Steve says honestly, surprising himself and Eddie by the look on his face.

Eddie buries himself into Steve’s chest, and Steve is sure he sees a peek of red flush Eddie’s cheeks before hiding it.

Steve is no stranger to a man’s body. Over the last few years, he realized some things about himself that Robin had been trying to tell him for a while, and since then has spent many nights in men’s arms. He’s mostly had one-night stands or casual flings. He never felt comfortable enough or had a real connection with any of them for a full-fledged relationship. For some reason, Eddie wrapped up under his coat, their legs tangled together, and sharing a lounger feels more intimate than any sexual encounter he’s had in the past three years.

Steve holds his hips back, making sure instincts, or just human nature, don’t completely embarrass him. He doesn’t even know if Eddie knows he likes guys too. If he did, he probably wouldn’t be nuzzled into his chest.

He can feel Eddie taking slow, calculated breaths, not filling his lungs completely, and wonders if he’s nervous too. Steve’s chin rests on the top of Eddie’s head, and he inhales one long breath, filling his lungs with the smells of his favorite Metalhead.

“Are you smelling me?” Eddie’s voice rumbles against Steve’s chest.

“It’s called breathing.”

“Uh-huh, sure. Do I smell good?”

“No, you smell like you were sweaty earlier.”

“I didn’t realize you recognized the smell of a sweaty man.”

Steve pauses and thinks about what he should say. This is his opening. Does he tell him? Should he say something?

Fuck it 

“I’ve had plenty of sweaty men in my arms before.”

Steve feels Eddie freeze, and Steve holds his breath, waiting for his response.

“W-what do you mean?” Eddie keeps his face covered in Steve’s chest.

“I’ve been with enough guys to recognize the smell of their sweat.” Steve continues to hold his breath in anticipation.

Eddie pulls back and stares up at Steve in shock. “I’m sorry, what?” Eddie starts to disentangle his body from Steve’s, and Steve begins to panic.

“It’s just…I, uh, yeah, thought you knew.” Steve stutters and wants to pull Eddie back into his arms, but he’s now standing next to him, staring at Steve in disbelief.

“No, I think I would remember that.” Eddie wipes his hand over his face while Steve tries to hold his panic back. “Uh, I’m gonna go inside. Fucking cold out here.” Eddie diverts his eyes and heads back inside.

Shit 

Steve pulls his phone out of his back pocket and slides open the screen to pull up Robin’s messages.

Steve: I fucked up 

Rob: You’re lucky I’m still awake. What did you do? 

Steve: I told Eddie that I’ve been with guys 

Rob: Is that how you said it? 

Steve: No, but he freaked out. We were hanging out, and then he got all weird and left. I didn’t think he’d react like that. I mean, I know he’s gay. Why would he get freaked out? 

Rob: Oh dingus. You poor poor innocent soul 

Steve: What? What does that mean? What do I do? Is he mad at me? Should I just leave? 

Rob: No, he’s not mad at you 

Steve: How do you know? You didn’t see him. He was upset 

Rob: I may have just gotten another text 

Steve: Is it him? Is he pissed? 

Rob: At me? Yeah. But not at you. 

Steve: At you? Why is he mad at you? 

Rob: Doesn’t matter, just know he’s not mad at you. Maybe give him space, just needs to adjust to this new information. 

Steve: Why does he need to adjust to it? Nothing changes 

Rob: Everything changes for Eddie 

Steve stares at his phone. What does that mean? Insecurity seeps into Steve’s veins as he sits outside in the cold dark winter air. He thought they were closer than that. He thought Eddie would understand. He thought it would be him if anyone would, but now it changes everything?

Steve pushes himself to his feet and slides his phone back into his pocket. He needs to get out of there. He keeps his head down as he enters the house and pushes his way to the front door. He doesn’t feel a pair of dark brown eyes following him through the crowd.

Second Time

Eddie doesn’t text Steve, and Steve doesn’t text Eddie. They both think about it. They both want to. They both hold their phones and stare at their messages multiple times over the following four days, but they do nothing.

“Is he going to be weird?” Steve asks Robin as they drive to Joyce and Hopper’s for dinner.

“I mean, weirder than he just is naturally? I don’t know.” Robin tries to stay neutral, but she’s squarely in the middle of the two of them. She’s trying so hard to let them work it out themselves and just be good friends to the pair, but each day that goes by tests her resolve. “Just stay away from him if you need to. There will be plenty of us there, so you’ll be fine.”

They pull up to a ranch-style home surrounded by large pine trees tucked into a culdesac and see multiple other cars parked outside.

“Alright, let’s get this over with.” Steve pushes his passenger door open and exhales. His nerves are shot, and he’s on the cusp of throwing up.

Robin saddles beside him and wraps her arm through his, pulling him to her side. She shakes him gently, trying to help calm him down. He appreciates her kindness.

Joyce pulls the door open with a broad smile and hugs them both.

“Oh you two! Steve, I’m so happy you could come down. Come in, come in. Everyone’s out back.” She steps aside and lets them enter the cozy love-filled home.

It smells amazing when they step indoors, and Steve cannot help but close his eyes and inhale deeply. It’s been so long since he’s had a decent home-cooked meal, let alone Thanksgiving. The holiday of holidays for fantastic cuisine.

“Wow, I love this place.” Steve looks around the house and sees some of Will’s art framed and hanging on the wall. His pieces have become gallery-worthy, and it warms Steve’s heart to see them proudly hung on his mother’s walls.

“Oh, that’s right, you’ve never been here. Let me show you around.” Joyce slips her arm around his, and Robin smiles at him and heads outside to join the others. “Thank you for coming down. The kids have missed you so much.”

“I’ve missed them too. It’s quieter in Chicago, too quiet sometimes.” He squeezes her arm and follows her throughout the place as she shows him the bedrooms, bathrooms, basement, living room, dining room, and sprawling kitchen. He looks around at the dishes cooking on the stove and inside the oven and doesn’t notice someone join them.

“Eddie! I didn’t hear you come in. Come give me a hug.”

Steve spins on his heels to see Eddie nervously approach Joyce, his eyes watching Steve. When Steve catches eye contact, Eddie tries to give him a nervous smile, so Steve gives one back. Steve realizes this may be a really long day.

“Have you two caught up yet?” Joyce motions to the two men.

“Yeah, Steve was at the Corroded show on Saturday.” Eddie twists one of the rings on his left hand, and Steve catches the anxiety motion.

“Oh great! That’s nice that you were down early enough to see him. I heard your shows are getting bigger and bigger. That’s very exciting.” Joyce runs her hand down Eddie’s arm, and Steve sees the pride blushing in her eyes. He loves this woman. She’s a gem and is grateful she’s accepted all the kids as her own. He couldn’t have asked for a better surrogate mother, and he’s relieved she shares this with Eddie.

“Yep,” Eddie avoids looking at Steve again.

“Well, everyone’s out back. Why don’t the two of you join them?” Joyce begins ushering them out towards the back door, and they end up squeezing through awkwardly side-by-side.

Steve doesn’t speak. He doesn’t want to cross a line he’s sure Eddie drew the other night. They’ll be civil for the kids, he knows, but over the last few days, he’s started to accept maybe he didn’t know Eddie like he thought he did, and perhaps they weren’t the friends he hoped they were.

But Eddie speaks and puts one tiny crack into the wall between them. “Hey, man.”

Steve doesn’t know how to answer and stumbles on a response. “Heeey-hi.” Steve sighs a sense of relief when his eyes find Robin seated at the picnic table. He dips away from Eddie and rushes to her side.

“Hey, please save me.” He flops next to her, and she rolls her eyes.

“From what? We just got here.”

“Eddie.” Steve leans over and puts his forehead on the tabletop.

“What happened?”

“Nothing,” he rolls his head over and presses his cheek down, looking up at her.

“Steve!” Dustin comes bounding over, and Steve hears exclamations from the other teens.

“Oh shit. Hey, bud.” Steve groans when Dustin throws his arms around his shoulders from behind.

“When did you get here?”

“Just a few minutes ago.” He chokes out through the aggressive hug. “I just saw you yesterday. Why are you trying to kill me?”

“You’re gonna leave soon, so I need to get all the physical contact when possible.” Dustin releases Steve with a huff and then slides into the bench next to him.

“Ok, weirdo.”

“Can I sit here?” Eddie nervously asks while sliding into the other side of the picnic table.

“It’s the cool table now.” Dustin beams brightly.

“Eddie, hey, man.” Mike puts his hand on Eddie’s shoulder while he slides in next to him.

Steve sighs, and Robin nudges him privately.

“Food’s ready. Come on, dish up.” Hopper calls out from the other side of the yard.

“Thank god,” Eddie pushes himself away from the table, and everyone follows suit.

The large group lines up to pile heaps of homemade food on their plates. Everyone gathers around the three different tables and digs into their meals. Robin, Steve, Dustin, Mike, and Eddie return to the picnic table.

“Shit, this is good,” Eddie says to no one in particular as he shovels mashed potatoes into his mouth.

“Joyce always kills it,” Steve adds.

Eddie’s eyes flick up, and he finally looks at Steve, giving him a small smile. Steve hopes that’s another crack in the wall. After everyone’s had seconds and sometimes thirds, the group begins to help clean up while Jonathan and Eddie sneak around the corner of the house unnoticed. Steve walks around with a garbage bag cleaning up paper plates and napkins, and when he has two full bags, he heads to the trash cans on the side of the house.

“Oh shit, hey.” Steve almost bumps into Jonathan’s side as he turns the corner. 

Jonathan is holding a joint to his lips and lighting it carefully. Eddie is leaning against the wall, waiting his turn.

“Harrington,” Eddie says with an even tone.

“Just throwing these away.” Steve lifts the two bags up, steps around the others, and deposits the bags into the trash cans.

“Jonathan!” Joyce’s voice calls from the backyard.

“Shit, here, take this.” Jonathan hands the joint to Eddie and disappears, leaving Eddie and Steve alone.

“Wanna join me?” Eddie holds the joint up, offering it to Steve.

“Yeah?” Steve cocks his eyebrow.

“Yeah, come on.” Eddie lights the tip making a perfect cherry, and takes a long pull. When he hands it to Steve, he releases the smoke into the air.

“I have missed this while in town.” Steve takes the joint and leans his back to the wall next to Eddie.

Eddie’s eyes stay up towards the sky, avoiding looking at Steve directly.

“I know a guy,” Eddie smirks, and Steve rolls his eyes.

“I think I also know a guy.”

“Oh yeah? Is it the hot guy?” Eddie jokes as they pass the joint back and forth between each other.

“Maybe, do we have the same taste in men?”

“Doubtful, Harrington.” Eddie sighs, and they let the silence grow between them.

“Shit, I’m already high. Your guy has pretty good weed.” Steve blinks a few times, trying to focus.

“The best in town.”

Steve takes the opportunity to turn his head and look over Eddie’s face. He’s never really looked before. Sure, he’s seen him, sure he’s glanced, sure he’s noticed, but he’s never honestly looked. He can see the smooth curve of his bottom lip, those full soft, looking lips. Has Eddie always had perfectly kissable lips before? Steve’s eyes drop down over Eddie’s chin and follow a taut neck muscle down to his collarbone. It looks good enough to bite.

“See something you like, Stevie?” Eddie can see Steve watching him from his periphery.

Yes 

Shit 

Really? 

Oh, no 

“Really good weed. I should stop, or Robin will have to roll me into her car.”

“I can take you back.” Eddie tilts his head to look at Steve. “Where’re you staying?”

“Robin’s parents’ place.”

“There you are,” Robin’s head pops from around the corner.

“Eddie’s gonna drive me back.” Steve blurts out.

Robin looks pointedly at Eddie and raises her eyebrows. “Oh is he?”

“I’m very high,” Steve admits.

“Yeah, you are. Alright, then I’ll see you back at my place. There’s pie out here if you two stoners want dessert.”

Steve’s eyes go wide, and Eddie snubs out the joint. They both rush around the corner, almost knocking Robin over.

About 45 minutes later, the two boys leave the party a little sobered up.

“Wanna finish this joint before you head back?” Eddie holds it up between them inside his van.

Steve’s eyes fall to Eddie’s mouth for a split second before answering.

“Yeah,” his response comes out breathier than he’d hoped.

A sly grin squeaks across Eddie’s mouth. He turns the key in the ignition, and the vintage van roars to life. They pull into a relatively empty park a few minutes later, and Eddie backs his van into the parking spot. When they hop out, Eddie throws the back doors open and motions to Steve to take a seat. Steve hops up, letting his legs dangle over the edge. Eddie joins him and sits closer than Steve expected. He’s not complaining, but it is causing a buzz through his body.

Eddie pulls the partially completed joint from his pocket and starts searching for his lighter.

“Hold this.” Eddie hands the joint to Steve and then leans into his space to search behind them in the van.

Steve’s mouth goes dry because Eddie has had to twist his body toward Steve to search further in the van, and Eddie’s knee is pressed into Steve’s thigh, while the side of Eddie’s chest is pressed into Steve’s arm. Steve’s starting to feel lightheaded.

“Here!” Eddie moves back and smiles wide, holding his prize between his fingers.

Steve awkwardly smiles and nods. Eddie gives Steve a nod, motioning to put the joint between his lips and offering to light it. Steve nervously places the joint between his lips, and Eddie’s hands move to the snubbed paper flicking the lighter and holding it close. Steve puffs a few times, getting it lit, and that lightheadedness worsens.

Eddie pulls his hands back when Steve’s sufficiently lit and watches. Steve feels like he’s being scrutinized or inspected.

“What?”

“Just watchin’.”

“See something you like?” Steve jokes, calling back Eddie’s comment from earlier.

“Yeah,” Eddie admits, and it makes Steve’s stomach twist. Eddie squeezes the joint between his thumb and index finger, carefully pulls it from Steve’s mouth, then slides it between his lips slowly. “You gotta share, Harrington.”

Steve hums a sound of acceptance and then watches as Eddie expertly puffs out a plume of smoke.

“When are you going home?” Eddie asks, keeping his eyes pointed forward.

“Tomorrow, before traffic is stupid driving back from the holiday travelers.” Steve leans back on his hands and kicks his legs back and forth.

Eddie hands the joint back to Steve and moves his body similarly. Eddie’s eyes slide over Steve’s body.

“You do realize you’re one of those holiday travelers?”

“Yes, yes I do.”

“So, no big Harrington family holiday dinner? You get the year off to visit little ‘ol Hawkins?”

Steve takes a hit and then passes it back. “The Harrington’s don’t do holiday dinners. Never have. My parents travel out of the country on vacation over Thanksgiving. This is the time of year they think Fiji or New Zealand sounds nice.”

“Really? Then what do you normally do over Thanksgiving?”

“This, or the last three years, I stayed in Chicago. Just a free Thursday off to me.”

“What about when you were a kid?” Eddie is trying to understand what Steve is sharing.

“Well, when I was really little, I got to go on vacations. But I usually stayed in the room with the nanny or whoever they brought along to keep me busy. Once I was a teen and could stay home alone, I’d go to Tommy H’s place or even Nancy’s for one year. Then Dustin’s a year. Dustin’s mom makes the best pumpkin pie. What about you? Did you and Wayne go all out?”

Eddie waits before responding, letting Steve’s answers digest for a minute. “Yeah, sometimes. He didn’t have to work those nights, so we’d eat later than most families and go all out. We aren’t great cooks, but I got pretty good at making mashed potatoes. I still don’t know how to make gravy, but we’d fancy up the packets pretty well. We’d have leftovers for a week, and he’d get to eat well at work.”

“That sounds nice,” and he meant it. A tradition like that sounded heavenly, sending an ache through his heart.

“It was. I’m sorry you didn’t get that.” Eddie nudges his shoulder into Steve, and their bodies jostle pleasantly together.

“It’s alright. I didn’t know any different.” Steve’s feeling fuzzy, and he doesn’t know if it’s from the weed or proximity of Eddie’s body.

“But still.”

Steve only responds with a shrug. 

The pair sit silently, letting the weed pleasantly cloud their thoughts. Steve thinks he can feel Eddie’s fingers brushing against his, but he doesn’t want to look, just in case.

“I guess I should take you back, huh? Robin will think I kidnapped you.”

“Hmm, yeah, send out a search team and everything.”

Steve doesn’t want to get out when Eddie pulls out in front of Robin's place a few minutes later. They both sit there for a beat, thinking of anything to say to prolong the conversation.

“Well, thanks, man. Had a good time.” Steve’s the first to break the silence.

“Yeah, good to see you, Harrington.” Eddie keeps his hands on the steering wheel but turns to smile at Steve.

“Happy Thanksgiving, Eddie.” Steve nods and then pushes the passenger door open.

“Happy Thanksgiving.”

Third Time

Steve hears the familiar ping of his phone and pulls it out of his pocket to see a new text notification.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: hey 

Eddie? 

It’s been 11 months since Thanksgiving at Joyce and Hopper’s, and the two haven’t spoken. Steve doesn’t want to admit that seeing Eddie’s text causes a surge of something deep in his stomach.

Steve: Hey 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: Corroded has a show in Chicago tomorrow night. If you’re not busy, two tickets are waiting for you at will call 

Steve glances over to his sleeping boyfriend, curled up on the other end of Steve’s couch. He looks back down at his phone and rereads the message. He doesn’t know why it feels like he’s doing something terrible. Eddie’s not flirting with him. There’s nothing implied in the context, but it still makes Steve nervous.

Steve: Yeah, that sounds great, man. Send me the details, and I’ll see you then 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: can’t wait 

Steve squeezes his eyes shut for a moment willing his heart to slow down, and when he opens them, he sees the text bubble popping up and then disappearing, then popping up and disappearing again. He holds his breath as he sees the bubble pop up and disappear three more times before it finally stops.

Steve: Eddie texted me 

Robin: What did he say? 

Steve: He’s gonna be in Chicago for a show tomorrow night and invited me 

Robin: Are you going? 

Steve: I kinda said I would 

Robin: Is Jake going? 

Steve: I don’t know. He’s asleep 

Robin: Are you going to ask him? 

Steve’s thumb hovers over the screen of his phone, waiting to reply. Was he? He should, right? But it’s not Jake’s scene, and he’s never met, Eddie. But it does feel like he’s sneaking around. Why does it feel like he’s sneaking around?

Robin: Steve? 

Steve: I’m figuring it out 🤦 

Robin: I thought you liked him 

Steve: I do! I do 

Steve: but 

Steve: it’s Eddie 

Robin: I thought you were over that whole thing 

Steve: So did I. Then I get a text from the man and my stomach is doing fucking Olympic sized flips 

Robin: You’re hopeless. Invite Jake, you like him, you’ve been together six months, and you’re having a good time. It’s just a concert and Eddie’s only there for one day. Don’t mess up a good thing over some guy you’ve never even kissed. The two of you are such a shit show 

Robin: Oh look at that. Eddie just texted me to say he texted you. I swear 

Steve: What did he say? 

Steve: Rob? 

Steve: Come on 

Steve: ROBIN 

Steve: Fine 

Steve: Ok, I’ll invite Jake 

Robin: Goodnight, dingus 

******

Steve nervously hands his ID to the bouncer, who checks his list and nods Steve and Jake inside. Jake has his finger hooked into Steve’s belt loop and smiles widely at him as they enter the dark club. Steve’s eyes dart around the room, hoping to see and avoid a certain curly-haired metalhead.

“This place doesn’t look what I thought it would.” Jake has to yell over the music from the speakers mounted above them.

“Yeah,” Steve tries to smile naturally at him in response.

“Hey, wanna drink?” Jake leans in towards Steve’s ear.

“Yes, can you get me a rum and coke with a lime?” Steve turns his head as Jake leans in and kisses Steve’s cheek just as Steve’s eyes meet Eddie’s from across the room.

The happy, excited smile Steve was blessed seeing, for a split second, immediately fades into confusion and something else Steve can’t put his finger on. Steve’s chest aches to bring the smile back, and he lifts his hand to give Eddie a wiggle of his fingers in a wave. Eddie nods back but turns around and heads out of view.

Jake returns a few minutes later to Steve, still standing in the same spot and staring across the room. Jake offers the drink to Steve, who takes it and gives him a kind smile. When he takes his first sip, he feels Jake slide his hand across his back, making Steve want to pull away.

“Have you seen your friend?” Jake starts bopping his head to the music, looking around at the crowd.

“Uh, yeah, for just a second. Just waved, though. He’s busy.” Steve tries to occupy himself with his drink and finishes it too fast. “Uh, I guess I was thirsty. I’ll go get me another one.”

Steve pulls away from Jake and heads to the bar. He leans against the edge and sets his drink down. He pulls out his phone, hoping to see a text. When he doesn’t, he sends one of his own.

Steve: Hey, thanks for the tickets. I can’t wait to hear the band again! It’s been too long 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: yeah glad you could use both of them 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: enjoy the show stevie 

Steve squeezes his eyes shut and inhales deeply.

“What can I get you?” The bartender brings Steve back to the moment.

“Uh, rum and coke with a lime.” Steve slides the empty glass over to him. He nods and walks away to mix Steve with a new one.

Steve: Saw Eddie and he saw Jake 

Robin: Steve 

Robin: Please don’t do this. I can’t do 3 months of this all over again. Enjoy the show with your boyfriend please for all that is holy. OR for once in your life actually have a conversation with Eddie and tell him WHAT YOU’RE FEELING 

Steve: Fine 

Robin: To which part? 

Steve: The first part 

Robin: Ok, then don’t text me again until it’s after the show and you’re telling me about the fantastic time you had with your boyfriend 

Steve sighs and slides his phone back into his pocket just as the bartender arrives with his drink. Steve hands over his card, and the bartender gives him a wink when he hands it back.

Great 

When he turns around, Steve sees Jake swaying back and forth to the Deftones cover band on stage. Jake’s holding the straw of his drink to his lips, and Steve thinks maybe Robin is right. He moves up behind him and slides his hand around Jake’s hip, pulling him to his chest. Steve rests his chin on Jake’s shoulder and kisses the side of his head. Jake looks over his shoulder and gives Steve a big smile before returning to the stage.

A few songs later, the band was waving to the crowd and moving off the stage, and Steve recognized a couple of the following band members moving equipment, and he knew Corroded Coffin was up next.

“This will be them,” he tells Jake.

Steve’s mouth goes dry while his entire body feels each second tick by in anticipation. He feels Jake slide his fingers through his hand and pull him close to his side. The dichotomy of emotions fighting inside Steve’s chest is making him nauseous. Steve swallows hard when the lights come up and watches as Eddie confidently struts onto the stage. His guitar is slung over his shoulder on his back.

Steve’s mouth falls open as he takes in Eddie’s appearance. He’s wearing tight black pants with a wide, almost bell bottom base and a black button-down long-sleeved shirt with four buttons undone, exposing his bare chest. A white vest covers the shirt, and Steve sees a glint of sparkle from two chains strung over Eddie’s neck. His hair is fuller and longer on the ends, but layers are added to give it texture. His bangs have grown out, and he’s got a pair of sunglasses on the top of his head. A smudge of eyeliner is swiped along his eyes, oozing sex appeal. He’s the epitome of mouth-watering, and Steve is gone for it.

“Is that?” Jake’s also taking in Eddie’s appearance. “Is that your friend?”

“Huh? Yeah, yeah, that’s…Eddie.” 

“He’s hot,” Jake laughs and turns to Steve catching him gawking at the gorgeous man on stage. Steve doesn’t notice the scrutinizing gaze. “Did you two…hook up?”

“What?” Jake’s question breaks the spell. “No, no, we never…I didn’t even realize, no.” Steve shakes his head profusely, hoping Jake believes him.

The band sounds better than ever, and Steve’s entranced by their frontman, much like everyone else in the audience. Eddie is not short on fans. Women and men alike stare up at him as he owns the stage. His fingers glide effortlessly over his guitar, and somehow, he moves his body to the music. He’s perfected the lead singer persona, and it suits him. Steve wants to kiss him. He wants to inhale his scent and lick every inch of his sweaty body.

Fuck 

When they come to their last song, Eddie pulls his electric guitar off his shoulders and sets it to the side of the stage. The rest of the band filters off, and Eddie picks up an acoustic sitting nearby.

“This is our last song, and about an hour and a half ago, I almost cut this from the setlist, but I’m a masochist. This is the only show on our tour to hear me sing this song. Enjoy, Chicago.” Eddie’s eyes slide upwards, and he immediately finds Steve’s.

Steve’s breath catches in his chest, and his fingers start to shake as Eddie begins to strum the song’s first few notes.

“A hundred days have made me older 

Since the last time that I saw your pretty face 

A thousand lies have made me colder 

And I don’t think I can look at this the same 

But all the miles that separate 

Disappear now when I’m dreaming of your face."

Steve feels caught in a trap. Something has him glued to the floor, and his shoes are stuck. He can’t look away as Eddie keeps staring directly at him as he continues to sing.

“I’m here without you, baby 

But you’re still on my lonely mind 

I think about you, baby 

And I dream about you all the time 

I’m here without you, baby 

But you’re still with me in my dreams 

And tonight, it’s only you and me, yeah.” 

Eddie finally pulls his gaze away at the end of the chorus, and Steve’s heart sinks to his feet.

Oh 

When Eddie finally makes it through the rest of the song, he and Steve both have matching silent tears. Eddie’s glint in the bright stage lights while Steve’s fall anonymously.

Steve makes an excuse and rushes to the bathroom after Eddie’s left the stage, but he’s confronted with a long line. He sees an exit door down the hall and pushes himself through. The crisp fall air catches his skin off guard, and he shutters from head to toe in chills. He exhales hard and leans over, putting his hands on his knees, and huffs a few hard breaths. He startles when he hears someone to his left clear their throat and speak up.

“Hey.”

Steve thinks he’s seeing a ghost when his eyes fall on Eddie, leaning against the wall with a cigarette between his lips.

“Hey, uh, good show.” Steve’s crossing his arms in front of his chest, trying to calm his nerves. “You sounded… the band sounded good. That was really good.”

“Glad you could come, Stevie.” Eddie takes a slow drag off his cigarette, and Steve stares at his lips wrapped around the filter, noticing the tears drying on his cheeks.

“Eddie?” Steve’s voice shakes nervously

“Steve?” Jake pushes the back door open, searching for Steve. “There you are! I was worried. Oh, hey, man.” Jake sees Eddie leaning against the wall. “That was an amazing show.” Jake wraps his arm around Steve’s waist and pulls him closer. Steve feels detached and lets his body be jostled.

Eddie flicks the cigarette down on the ground and stubs it with his toe. “Thanks, man.” He licks his lips, and his eyes rake over Jake’s body, inspecting him. “Glad Stevie, here, could bring you. I’m Eddie.” He reaches out and offers it to Jake, who innocently juts his hand into Eddie’s and responds pleasantly.

“Hey, I’m Jake, Steve’s boyfriend.”

Steve sees Eddie’s smile drop for a millisecond before adjusting back to a neutral position.

“That’s so great,” Eddie looks over to Steve. “So great. Well, it was good to see you, Steve. Nice to meet you, Jake. I gotta head back inside. Just so great. I’m happy for you.” Eddie’s smile dips again, and Steve can see Eddie fisting his fingers together as he moves away and yanks open the door, heading back into the cacophony of music.

“Hey, uh, I-I kinda have a headache. Can we go?” Steve feigns illness and rubs his fingers across his forehead.

“Of course, babe. Let me take care of you.” Jake bites his lip and gives Steve a playful wink.

“Oh, I um, actually, it’s pretty bad; it feels like one of my migraines. I’m just going to bed, so you don’t need to come back to my place. I gotta get up early anyway.”

“You sure? I don’t mind.” Jake rubs his hand over Steve’s arm, trying to comfort him.

“Y-yeah.” Steve feels unnerved and needs to get away from the club and Jake as soon as possible. His body feels like it can sense Eddie inside, pulling him toward the source.

“Ok, well then, I’ll see you this weekend?”

“Mhm, Saturday.”

Jake leans in and presses his lips carefully against Steve’s, who tries to respond naturally and kiss him back. 

“Text me when you get home, ok?”

“Yeah, night.” 

“Love you, baby.” Jake winks at Steve.

Steve hesitates for one millisecond before responding. “Love you, too.”

Steve feels rotten when he finally steps into his dark apartment 35 minutes later. He sends a quick text to Jake, letting him know he’s home, and then collapses onto his couch.

He swipes open his screen and clicks on Eddie’s messages. Maybe Robin was right; maybe it was time he said something, anything, to Eddie. He notices the bubble appear that someone was typing on the other end and sits up on the couch, clutching his phone closer to his face.

“Come on,” he whispers. He thinks about typing something, so Eddie sees the bubble on his side too. He doesn’t think about what to say because he’s going to delete it, but he just starts typing.

I’m sorry things got weird. I hope you don’t hate me. I almost didn’t bring him, but that would’ve been weird. I mean, he is my boyfriend. I’ve liked you for a long time and thought I had no chance. But then, tonight. You looked incredible. Fuck I wanted to kiss you. I bet you taste so good. I bet you feel even better. I’ve jerked off to you so many fucking times. I wish you were here. I like Jake. He’s good to me. But he’s no Eddie Munson. My fantasies about you are better than his and my sex life. You’re not even really there, and it’s fucking better! How is that possible? Does that mean if you were, my brain would explode? I bet you’re really good with your fingers. Fuck. Now I’m thinking about your fingers inside of me. No, I have a boyfriend. I have a boyfriend who I think I love. I don’t know. If I did, I wouldn’t be thinking about you fucking me. Fucking me. You. Fucking. Me. God, I bet that’s good. What do you sound like? I bet it’s hot. I bet you’re vocal. I bet you talk dirty. God, that would kill me. Shit, Eddie. You don’t even live here. What is wrong with me? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: I see you 

“Shit.” Steve’s stomach drops, and he accidentally hits the send button out of muscle memory.

When the text moves from the box up to the screen, his brain recognizes what he’s done and, in slow motion, starts to panic.

“Oh god, NO, NO, SHIT. Uh, fuck fuck fuck.” He quickly presses the message and fumbles to delete it. The message disappears, and the notification that he unsent a message appears. His heart is beating a million miles a minute, and he prays that he caught it before Eddie saw it.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: what was that? 

“Shit,” Steve squeezes his eyes shut, hitting himself in the forehead with the edge of his phone.

Steve: Nothing 

Steve: Accident 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: it didn’t look like nothing 

Steve: What did you see? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: something about me not living here and you asking what was wrong with you 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: but that was a lot of text 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: is there something you want to tell me Steve? 

“Yes,” Steve whispers to himself.

Steve: Just that I’m sorry, things got weird between us and it was really nice to see you. You looked 

Hot 

Sexy 

Fuckable 

Steve: good 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: you looked 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: good too 

Steve: I liked the acoustic song 

Steve: It was beautiful 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: then I’m glad I didn’t cut it 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: and that you didn’t miss it 

Steve wants to ask him and make sure, but this moment feels too fragile to risk.

Steve: When are you going back to Indiana? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: tomorrow 

Steve: Too bad I couldn’t stay tonight. We could’ve caught up. 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: yeah but you and jake had to get back to your perfect little life and ran out of here 

Steve: It’s not perfect. He went home. I needed to be alone 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: you’re at home alone? 

Steve: Yeah 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: what are you doing? 

Steve: Just hanging out on my couch 

Steve sees the bubble appear and disappear a few times before Eddie’s subsequent text comes through.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: why’d you wanna be alone? 

Steve: Just had some stuff on my mind. Wanted to think about it 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: what’s on that pretty little mind of yours stevie? 

Steve: I don’t really know 

You 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: then you should’ve stayed. I could’ve helped you forget all about it 

Steve: I don’t know that weed would help this situation 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: I never mentioned weed 

Steve stares at Eddie’s text, his heart thumping against his ribcage. He thinks he knows what Eddie is implying and hopes he does.

Steve: How do you know you wouldn’t make it worse? 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: would helping you forget all your troubles and make you feel good instead really be worse? 

Shit 

Steve sighs while his body betrays him, sending a few sparks to his midsection.

Steve: Maybe 

Steve: Especially if it’s really good 

Steve throws his arm over his eyes. What is he doing? What are they doing? What is even going on? They haven’t spoken in almost a year, and now? They’re what? Flirting? On the verge of sexting even? Steve groans, tosses his phone on the couch and heads into the kitchen. He ignores the ping from his phone as he peruses the contents of his refrigerator. After a few seconds of staring at nothing in particular, he slams the door shut and turns back to stare at the couch. He can see his phone screen lit up, antagonizing him.

He hears a second ping, pulling him back like a sea siren tempting passing sailors. He grabs his phone from the cushion and reads Eddie’s messages.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: I could come over 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: if you wanted company 

And oh god, does he. His dick is betraying him as the thought of Eddie coming to his door in the middle of the night, maybe pushing him against the wall and grabbing his throat, consumes his mind. He presses the heel of his palm into the hardening bulge in his pants, trying to adjust himself.

Steve collapses back onto his couch and stares at his phone. Why was this happening now? After Thanksgiving last year, Steve realized he didn’t just think Eddie was attractive, he didn’t just think he was sexy, but he realized he had a massive crush on him. Sure he wanted to fuck the shit out of him, but he also wanted to hold his hand. He wanted to brush his hair out of his face. He wanted to hear him talk about what kind of D&D dice he bought or what guitar strings were the best. He wanted to spend time with him. He wanted to hear him laugh, but instead, they had this partially constructed wall between them that made things awkward and weird.

Steve spent months talking to Robin about everything. He’d dissected every interaction, every breath, every side glance that happened that week he was in Hawkins, and eventually, she told him to stop. She couldn’t continue listening to Steve pine after someone he refused to speak to. She pointed out that he could find all these answers if he talked to Eddie directly. But Steve couldn’t do that. What if Eddie laughed at him? What if Eddie told him he was an idiot and then joked about it in front of Dustin and the boys? Or worse, what if he was disgusted? Steve couldn’t risk it, couldn’t risk his heart.

So he moved on. Then he met Jake, and things got better. Jake was fun, he made Steve laugh, and they had a lot in common. They listened to the same music. They have the same taste in food. They even both played sports in high school. It made it easy to find common ground between them. And Steve thought Jake was sexy. He was a little shorter than Steve but had an athletic build. He had blonde hair and bright blue eyes. Steve noticed as they sparkled when he smiled. He made him feel comfortable, safe even, and easy. But Steve was still hiding things from him. Steve couldn’t tell Jake about the trauma. He couldn’t explain the constant continuous nightmares he had this many years later. He couldn’t properly explain the scars and why movies with Russian characters were always off the table. But it was ok; Steve was still pretty happy. It was fine.

Steve: You don’t have to do that. I’m 35 minutes away from where you are 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: still closer than 4.5 hours 

Steve: True 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: say the word stevie 

Steve hesitates and doesn’t know what to say.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: or I could just text it to you 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: tell you instead 

Steve’s skin sizzles at the idea, but his stomach twists in knots. As badly as he wants to read exactly what Eddie is implying, he can’t do that to Jake.

Steve: You don’t have to do that 

Steve: I can imagine it pretty well 

Steve: I should go to bed anyway. I gotta wake up early in the morning 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: then I guess we’ll just stay in our imaginations 

Favorite Metalhead ❤: goodnight, Harrington 

Steve: Night, Eddie 

Fourth Time

Steve’s phone rings and he is surprised to see Nancy Wheeler calling him.

“Nance?”

“Hey! So, Robin’s birthday is coming up, and I’m trying to throw a surprise party. Would you be willing to head to Indy next Saturday? You can crash at our place.”

“Shit, yes I’m in. What do I need to bring? Or when do you need me there? I will adjust my schedule.”

Nancy and Robin got closer after the Upside Down. They both moved to Indianapolis for college and developed feelings for one another. Steve was a little uncomfortable with that at first because he always viewed Robin like a sister, so her dating his ex-girlfriend was weird. Eventually, though, he realized the two were a much better pairing than he and Nancy ever were. They’re both geniuses, match energies, fall into the perfect yin and yang, and now he could never imagine them with anyone else.

“If you wanted to come up Friday, you could, but you can’t stay here that night. So that’s up to you, but after Saturday, you could stay as long as you wanted if you didn’t care we had work and school to go to.”

“Well, I’ll shoot for Saturday then, and we’ll go from there. What time can I come to your place?”

“Any time after 11, and you’re good.”

“Perfect.”

“Oh, um, just so you know. Eddie’s coming, and he’s bringing someone.”

Steve’s stomach drops. He hadn’t even thought about Eddie maybe being there, and now Nancy’s telling him he will be and bringing a date? Great.

“Oh, ok. Cool, yeah, thanks for telling me. That’s cool. Cool. Yeah.” It was clearly not cool, but he was trying to convince himself otherwise.

“You gonna be ok?” Nancy asks gently.

“Me? Yeah, I’m fine. It’ll be great. I haven’t seen him since his show back in October. We didn’t get to hang out that night, so it’ll be great.”

Steve hadn’t told Robin about the texts from that night. He already knew what she was going to say, so he didn’t see any point. Steve did end up breaking it off with Jake. It took him a few weeks, but it was apparent that Jake wasn’t the one. Eddie and Steve haven’t texted again since. Every once in a while, Steve will open the messages, reread them, and wonder what could’ve happened. What would’ve happened if he’d invited Eddie over. Steve tells himself it’s ok, though. It’s for the best. He and Eddie just can’t get it together, and now that he’s apparently dating someone, they miss their timing again. Maybe it’s just not meant to be, but that’s ok.

“Good. You know she’s worried about you?”

“Rob? Tell her she doesn’t need to. I’m good.”

“You go on any dates lately?”

Steve knows she’s fishing.

“No, it’s been nice. I need the break.”

“You’ll meet someone, Steve. You deserve a storybook romance.”

“Thanks, Nance. I’ll see you next week, ok? Text me if you need me to bring anything or pick something up that day.”

“Will do. Oh hey, we’re gonna have karaoke, so make sure you warm up your vocal cords.”

“Oh great, can't wait to listen to Robin’s drunken rendition of Melissa Etheridge’s I’m the Only One. Again.” He emphasizes the last word.

“Yeah, me either.” She replies in a thoughtful tone.

“I don’t get it. Alright, well I’ll see you next Saturday.”

“Bye.”

Steve busies himself between then and Saturday and ends up showing up at Nancy and Robin’s place around noon with an armful of balloons. He helps Nancy finish setting up with a few of their college friends, and when the rest of the guests arrive, he directs people to hiding spots. He had kept himself so busy that day he’d forgotten Eddie was supposed to be there.

Around 7 pm, Robin turned her key to the apartment door while everyone was hiding in the dark.

“SURPRISE!” 

15 of Robin’s closest friends jump out and scare the crap out of her. She drops her purse and clutches her chest while holding her right hand out as if she were gripping a weapon. She wasn’t, though, so it looked like she put her fist out in front of her body, holding an invisible wand.

“ARE YOU KIDDING ME?” She yelled, and when her brain registered who everyone was, she dropped her hands to her side and let her head fall backward, exhaling loudly.

“Shit, babe? Oh I’m so sorry. We just wanted to surprise you.” Nancy rushes to Robin’s side and puts her hands on her shoulders.

“I know, I know, and I love you for that, but holy crap, Nancy.”

Steve steps over to them and puts his hands carefully on each of their shoulders. “You ok?”

“Oh god, Steve, you’re here? Oh, Nancy.” Robin looks up at Steve, and tears start to fill her eyes.

“Of course, I’m here. I’ve driven over here for way less. The least I could do was be here for your surprise party, dummy.”

Everyone laughs, and someone in the room turns the music back on. As the group disperses and starts enjoying the party, Robin wraps her arms around her girlfriend and best friend. They squeeze each other tight and then feel another set of arms wrap around them.

“I’m glad I didn’t miss group hug time!” 

They break apart and see a wide-grinning Eddie Munson beaming brightly.

“OH EDDIE!” Robin flings her arms around his neck and squeezes him tight. Eddie’s eyes find Steve’s, and he gives him a polite smile, and Steve nods in response.

“Hey, I want you all to meet Zach.” Eddie bites his lip and turns to grab the wrist of a man standing behind him. “Zach, this is Robin, the birthday girl. Nancy, the girlfriend of the birthday girl, and Steve, the best friend of the birthday girl. Everyone, this is Zach.”

Steve’s heart thuds as he recognizes the smile Eddie is giving Zach. He’s seen it before pointed in his own direction, but being in the presence of it while it’s pointed at someone else, hurts more than he could’ve imagined.

Zach gives all three of them a nervous wave, and Steve feels Robin slide her fingers into his hand and give him a comforting squeeze. Zach was handsome, Steve would fully admit. He looks exactly how you’d imagine Eddie’s boyfriend would look. His hair was dark brown, clearly dyed and fading from black, a little longer on the top but shaved tight at the sides. Steve bets with a little bit of product, it becomes a mohawk. He has a nose ring in his right nostril and an eyebrow piercing. He’s wearing a worn-out Suicidal Tendencies tee and a studded belt. There’s not a single thing on the man that resembles Steve. It’s glaringly obvious Steve never had a chance.

“Where’s uh….” Eddie snaps his fingers, trying to remember someone’s name. “Jack? No, Jake, where’s Jake?” Eddie’s asking casually, but Steve wonders if it’s more than that.

“We broke up months ago.” Steve awkwardly replies.

Eddie’s eyebrows shoot up, “oh, sorry.” Then Steve notices a quick glance Eddie gives Robin before looking back at Steve.

“It’s fine. Good to see you, man. Nice to meet you, Zach.” Steve smiles pleasantly, trying to hide the jealousy coursing him. Steve doesn’t see the knowing glance pass between Nancy and Robin.

As the night progressed, Steve threw caution to the wind and leaned hard into ‘fuck it.' He was doing shots with anyone that wanted to join him. He tried to get a beer pong competition going, but he just drank all the beer instead when no one participated. He’d avoided Eddie and Zach the rest of the night. Every time Eddie started to come near him, he’d immediately stop whatever conversation he was in and walk away. When Nancy pulled out the karaoke machine, Steve was willing to be the first volunteer. 

“I’m gonna go first, me, gimme.” Steve grabbed the microphone from Nancy and smiled wide. He found the song he needed to sing and looked around the room as the first few notes played.

“Shit,” Robin exclaims quietly as she sees Steve from across the room. 

“Guess mine is not the first heart broken 

My eyes are not the first to cry 

I’m not the first to know 

There’s just no getting over you”

By the end of the first verse, the whole room had quieted while listening to Steve belt out his rendition of Hopelessly Devoted to You. His words were slurring, but everyone could still understand him. His voice was surprisingly beautiful. Everyone was entranced not by the disaster that usually happened during birthday karaoke but by the surprising talent performing in the middle of Robin’s living room. But the only person Steve could see was Eddie. He had been leaning against the wall in the kitchen talking to Zach when Steve started, but he’s moved a few feet closer by the end of this verse.

“I know I’m just a fool who’s willing 

To sit around and wait for you 

But baby, can’t you see there’s nothing else for me to do? 

I’m hopelessly devoted to you”

Steve’s head is swimming, and he has to lean against the wall behind him to keep his balance. Eddie’s gaze is digging deep inside of him and making him weak.

“But now there’s nowhere to hide 

Since you pushed my love aside 

I’m out of my head 

Hopelessly devoted to you 

Hopelessly devoted to you 

Hopelessly devoted to you” 

Steve doesn’t notice as Robin heads near him. She sees her best friend breaking down in front of everyone in that room and wants to protect him. Tears fall from his face as he tries to continue the song. His voice is getting shakier, but he can’t tear his eyes away from Eddie’s face.

“My head is sayin’, 'Fool, f-forget him' 

My heart is sayin’, 'Don't let g-go.'”

At that moment, Robin slides up to his side, wraps her arm around his waist, and takes the microphone from his shaking hand. He smiles at her weakly and nods. She finally cut the invisible cord from Eddie’s eyes. The room watches silently as Robin guides Steve to her and Nancy’s bedroom. Robin looks for Nancy and is relieved when she hears the music come back on and cover up Steve’s crying. When Eddie tries to approach them, Robin shakes her head at him and tells him ‘not now.’

“Here, lay down, ok?” Robin carefully sets Steve on their bed and helps him untie his shoes. 

“Why am I not good enough?” He quietly asks.

Robin presses her hands on Steve’s shoes and feels her heart rip apart.

“You, Steve Harrington, are more than good enough, and if he can’t see that, then fuck him. Lift your foot up.” She guides Steve’s legs as she removes his shoes and helps him lay back on the mattress. “Shhhh, just go to sleep, ok? It’ll be better in the morning. I love you, dingus.” She runs her fingers through his hair, brushing it off his forehead.

“Love you, too.” He murmurs as he quietly fades asleep.

Robin looks up at the door and sees Nancy hugging her chest. When Robin stands up, her girlfriend slips into their bedroom and pulls her into a firm hug. Nancy squeezes Robin tight through her tears and understands. Neither of them hears a quiet ping hit Steve’s phone.

Favorite Metalhead ❤: 💔 

Last Time

Steve never replied to Eddie’s text. When he’d woken up the following day in Robin’s bed with one of the worst hangovers he had in years, he pretended nothing had happened. He didn’t remember anything, so for him, it was easy, but Robin filled him in. He vowed never to show his face around her friends again and promised not to mix alcohol in her presence.

Now, six months later, Steve was headed back to Hawkins for Max’s 21st birthday party. He’d checked Corroded Coffin’s show schedule and was happy to see they would play that Saturday night. He couldn’t bring himself to text Eddie, but he needed to see him. He would sneak into the show and watch from the back, avoiding anyone he might know. Max’s official party was Sunday afternoon, so he was secretly showing up one day early. He’d rented a room at a motel since Robin, Nancy, Dustin, and his parents had all moved out of town. Max was still living at home with her mom, and it would’ve been inappropriate to ask her to crash there.

He brought a few outfits to wear to the concert. He knew he was supposed to be in hiding, but he wanted to look good just in case he got caught. He blamed it on being out, being at a concert in general, but it was obviously for Eddie. It’s been almost two years since Steve came out to Eddie while wrapped together in his jacket. It feels somehow longer and shorter at the same time. Robin told Steve when Eddie broke up with Zach. He knows she did it in hopes of pushing him to finally say something to Eddie, but it felt too late to Steve.

He’s been busy with work, school, and volunteering but has remained single. He needs to put more time and distance between his feelings for Eddie and other people on the planet. He knows if he does it too soon, they’ll only be compared to that Metalhead and never stand a chance. 

Steve slides his brown suede jacket over his denim button-down shirt. It’s a lighter shade than the straight-leg jean he has rolled up over a pair of light brown boots. His hair has grown a little longer again. It’s swept to one side, and he can feel a curl wrapping around his right ear. He inspects himself in the adequate motel mirror and adjusts his belt carefully. When he feels happy with the view, he sprays a few spritzes of his cologne across his chest.

Ten minutes later, he parks his car and heads inside. He shows his ID to the bouncer at the door and moves up to the bar.

“What’ll it be?” The bartender asks.

“Rum and coke with a lime.” When the bartender walks away to mix Steve’s drink, Steve leans against the bar and looks across the room.

There are plenty of people already milling about. The music is loud, but there isn’t a live band playing yet, so it’s not crowded.

“Y’know, if you’d told me you were coming, I would’ve gotten you in for free.”

Steve turns to find Eddie standing right behind him. He didn’t feel him come up. He didn’t feel him invading his space. He was so busy searching for him that he missed him completely.

“Shit, uh, hey. I know, but I didn’t want to bother you.” Steve’s heart was racing.

“That’ll be $8.50.” The bartender sets Steve’s drink down on the bar, and Steve has to turn away from Eddie to pay his bill. He uses the brief opportunity to take a deep breath and collect himself before turning back.

“You could never bother me, Stevie. It’s good to see you.” Steve watches as Eddie’s eyes graze over his body. “You look good.”

“Yeah, thanks, so do you.” Steve’s grateful it’s dark in the bar, so Eddie can’t see his blush.

“I’ll look even better later.” Eddie grins and gives Steve a playful wink.

“Yeah?” Steve attempts to lean into the flirting.

“Oh yeah. What are you doing in little ‘ol Hawkins, Steve?” Eddie puts his hand on the bar next to Steve and leans over, invading more of Steve’s personal space.

“Uh,” Steve’s mouth goes dry. “Max’s birthday tomorrow.”

“And came a night early just to see me?”

Yes 

“I saw the band was playing, so I thought I’d come down.” Steve’s lungs are filled with Eddie’s scent, cedarwood, and amber mixed with something citrusy. He could swim in it.

“What are you doing after the show?”

“I was…nothing,” Steve shakes his head.

“Hmm, for now. I better get backstage.” Eddie pushes himself off the bar and stands in front of Steve. “I gotta add a sudden last-minute song to the set.”

Steve swallows hard as Eddie takes one last leering glance at Steve. His nerves are shot by the time the band gets on stage. Now that he’s been caught, he doesn’t feel the need to stand near the back. He moves closer to the stage and takes his position in front of Eddie, a few people back. He’s not right up front, but he’s close enough to be seen.

Eddie wasn’t lying when he said he would look better later. When he waltzes on stage wearing tight leather pants and nothing but a leather jacket over his bare chest, Steve is sure he will have a heart attack. His hands are laden with chunky metal rings, and a lone dagger earring hangs from his right ear. He was fucking hot.

Eddie winks at Steve throughout the concert, sending shivers up his spine. His whole body is on fire, watching Eddie in his element. Every time Steve enjoyed seeing Eddie on stage, it was a different experience for his senses. This one felt like the first time he was actually seeing him. It was an incredible turn-on.

“Ok, this is gonna be a change of pace. The band is gonna take a quick break while I hopefully don’t make a fool out of myself. They’ll be back, and you fuckers will love it.” Eddie turns to the band members, and they all slide off stage. Steve sees one of them smirk and roll their eyes.

Eddie motions to someone in the room, and music comes over the speakers. Steve thinks he might faint.

“Guess mine is not the first heart broken 

My eyes are not the first to cry 

I’m not the first to know 

There’s just no getting over you ”

Even though he didn’t remember singing that night, Robin gave him every ounce of detail so he could create a memory in his mind. He bites back a laugh while the rest of the crowd murmurs in confusion. Eddie nervously sings and tries to keep eye contact with Steve, but it’s obvious he’s anxious about how Steve will react to the song.

“I know I’m just a fool who’s willing 

To sit around and wait for you 

But baby, can’t you see there’s nothing else for me to do? 

I’m hopelessly devoted to you ”

Steve finds it easier to move closer to the stage as the crowd moves around to refill drinks and take bathroom breaks during the unique genre change. Eddie uses Steve’s actions to build his courage and shift his tone from nervousness to a confident frontman.

“But now there’s nowhere to hide 

Since you pushed my love aside 

I’m out of my head 

Hopelessly devoted to you 

Hopelessly devoted to you 

Hopelessly devoted to you”

When Steve finally makes it directly in front of the stage, he looks up at the man who’s been ruining his life in the most absurd, frustrating way for the past several years. Eddie moves forward, his toes at the edge of the stage, towering over Steve. They both exist in the space as if they were all alone and not surrounded by a couple of hundred strangers.

“My head is sayin’, 'Fool, forget him'

My heart is sayin’, 'Don't let go

Hold on to the end', that's what I intend to do 

I’m hopelessly devoted to you”

Eddie moves his body and kneels to get closer to Steve. Steve can feel his heart fluttering like a hummingbird in his chest. His mouth falls open, and he doesn’t know if he’s even breathing. Eddie’s hand reaches down and brushes against Steve’s cheek sending sparks flying through his veins.

“But now there’s no way to hide 

Since you pushed my love aside 

I’m outta my head 

Hopelessly devoted to you 

Hopelessly devoted to you 

Hopelessly devoted to you”

As the music fades and a smattering of applause breaks out in the room, Eddie drops the microphone and grabs Steve’s face, leaning down and crashing his lips onto his. Steve feels his chest constrict and reaches up to hold Eddie’s face as they pull each other toward their mouths. Just as they are about to forget they’re in public, the room erupts in applause. There are whistles and cheers and encouraging clapping surrounding them. Steve’s eyes shoot open, and he hesitantly pulls back, staring at Eddie, who grins wide.

“I should’ve done that two years ago, actually shoulda done that five years ago,” Eddie whispers. “I’m gonna finish this show, and afterward, this time, you’re gonna let me make you feel good. Ok?”

Steve silently nods in easy agreement. 

Notes:

1. The acoustic song Eddie sings is Here Without You by 3 Doors Down. 2. Steve singing Hopelessly Devoted to You was inspired by jayshifts on TikTok saying Steve would have a beautiful singing voice and sing open mic night at the hideout. I took personal liberties with that idea but fell in love with it and Harry Styles' rendition during his Halloween show that she plays under her TikTok video. 3. They leave the show and have some of the best sex of their lives and live happily ever after, because I said so

[andreafmn]

Collision | Chapter 19

Word Count: 3.6K Story Description: (Y/N) Uley is back home after being away for four years. Her life is at its first standstill and she is taking this time to find out who she is without school. But she never thought that coming back to the reservation would turn her whole life around. In the midst of secrets and mystery, a man crashes into (Y/N)’s and her life will never be the same. Chapter: 19/? A/N: Um, cannot believe this story is at 19 chapters already. like, what? I'm thinking of separating the series into each of the books, that way we don't get to like 100 chapters because it's basically just a Twilight rewrite 😅😅 My content will always be free, but if you’re feeling particularly generous, you can leave a tip on any of my posts  or buy me a coffee to support me and my love of writing Follow 😊 -> TikTok • Instagram • Business If you’d like to be tagged in this or any other story: click here Make sure you have my notifications on so you know every time I post! Please check if you’re tagged in the story, I’ve reached the limit of tags on Twilight again it seems. 😅

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Chapter 19

(Y/N) felt guilt surging through her as she knocked on the door of the Swan residence. She knew she had been in pain. That just like Bella she had been abandoned by the person they thought was the love of their life. But she had crawled out of the dark hole she had sunk into, fighting tooth and nail against everything that wanted to keep her down. Although, she could still feel their claws scraping at her skin, breathing down her neck, and whispering their return.

But even if she still wasn’t a hundred percent healed and she still cried herself to sleep on the nights she was alone, she wanted to at least help Bella take the first step out.

“(Y/N),” Charlie smiled. “Thank you for coming over.”

“Of course, Charlie. I just wanna make sure Bella gets better, or at least start to.”

“I’ve been meaning to ask you. And you don’t have to answer if you don’t want to,” he stammered slightly. “Before the Cullens left, there was talk in the town about the doctor. You know, about who he was seeing…”

“You’re wondering if we were together?” (Y/N) smiled, pushing down the sadness that was threatening to spill out with her words. “Well, I’ll let you know that those rumors were true. And, yes, just like Bella, he broke up with me and left. I’m guessing that’s why you asked me to talk to her.”

“It is,” he smiled awkwardly. “I’m not usually keen on small-town gossip, but I’d heard that you had been in a funk since they left, and I put two and two together. And seeing how well you’re doing now, I needed to throw out a hail Mary and see if you could help Bella.”

“It’s okay, Charlie. I knew that people talked about us,” she said reassuringly. “And though it’s been hard, with the help of my friends and family, I was able to start piecing myself back together. I only hope I can help do the same with Bella.”

“I hope so to,” he breathed defeatedly. “I have to run out to work right now but you can help yourself to anything in the kitchen or you can get some pizza, or even take Bella to the diner. I’ll cover the whole tab.”

“I think we’ll manage, Charlie. But thank you,” she chuckled. “I’m no miracle worker but I will try my best.”

“That is all I can ask,” he said. “You probably won’t be here when I get back, so I’m gonna thank you again for trying with Bella. I’m glad that she has people in her corner like you.”

 “She will always have a friend in me.”

(Y/N) waved the man away as he left the house, pointing her upstairs in the direction of Bella. With the man gone the house was eerily quiet. If she hadn’t known the other girl was in her room, she would have thought Charlie had left her in an empty house. There was no sign of life. And she hated how familiar that felt.

She walked up the creaky stairs, bracing herself for whatever version of Isabella Swan she would be faced with. She knew what losing yourself in heartache looked and felt like, and it was not pretty.

The door to Bella’s room was open, still no indication of movement, and for a second (Y/N) felt like she was intruding into someone’s privacy. Until she saw the girl’s figure as still as a statue on the far end of her bedroom staring out the window.

Bella looked paler than usual, her cheeks slightly sunken and her eyes wearing dark bags under them. She hadn’t been sleeping or eating well and it was evident on her body. If someone had told her that the Swan girl had not moved from that chair in months, she would have believed them.

“Hey, Bella.” (Y/N)’s voice startled her. The girl jumped as though her systems had jump-started at the sound of another presence. “Don’t know if your dad told you but he asked me to come over. I know we haven’t seen each other in a while.”

“Oh, hey,” she muttered. “Yeah, I think he mentioned something.”

“I guess it’s no surprise that he asked me to come talk to you, huh?”

“Because of them,” she sighed.

“Yeah,” (Y/N) smiled painfully, sitting on the ledge of the window right in front of her.

She had practiced a speech at home, words of encouragement that would hopefully chip at the wall Bella had built around herself. She’d practiced speech after speech, picking from every talking to Sam and her mom had related to her, every phrase that made her own heart soften.

But standing before Bella, the words had died in her throat. There was nothing she could say to make it better. No amount of bullshit could make her better. What the Cullens had done to both of them Would not be remedied with a conversation. And that was all (Y/N) had.

“How’d you do it?” Bella asked after a few minutes in silence. “How were you able to move on from him?”

“To be honest… I haven’t,” she sighed, the confession tasting acrid on her tongue. “And I don’t think I ever will. I don’t think you ever really move on from someone you were ready to give up your whole life for.”

“But you seem to have it all together now,” she exclaimed. “You’re in med school, you’re going to parties, you’re working at the hospital. And you look happy.”

“I’ll let you in on a secret, Bella. That’s the beauty of pretending. People don’t question someone that looks happy,” (Y/N) smiled softly. “I’m not doing any better than you just because it looks like I am. If I’m telling the truth, I am still as heartbroken as I was the day they left. I just decided that pretending was easier than hurting.”

“I just feel like I’ll be in pain for the rest of my life,” the girl cried softly. “I just wish there was something I could use to numb it all. I just want it to stop.”

“That’s not the answer either, Bella. And I would know. I spent the first two months drowning my sorrows with vodka,” she confessed. “And even if I felt numb for a few hours the pain was still there. It always will be, I think.”

“Then how do we make it through? How do we stop it from hurting more?”

“I don’t think we can stop it from hurting. All we can do is keep going regardless of how much it hurts,” (Y/N) offered. “But if they get to go on with their lives after leaving us as they did, then we owe it to ourselves to do the same. The best way to make them pay is to show them our lives went on without them.”

“It’s just,” her voice croaked. “I don’t think I can. Actually, I don’t think I want my life to go on without Edward. I had never seen forever the way I saw it with him. Didn’t you feel like that with Carlise?” 

At the sound of his name, the knot in (Y/N)’s throat tightened. It had been months since her ears had listened to that combination of letters. Everyone around her had quickly picked up on the situation and they had more than willingly stopped mentioning his name.

But there Bella was, speaking it into existence as if it wasn’t the most bitter word to let pass through her tongue. She said them like the beautiful names they were, like the sweetness of them wasn’t overwhelming in her mouth. She spoke like a girl that was still in love and had no disdain for the person that had hurt her. And (Y/N) wondered how that could be.

His name was laced with so much anger and sadness that (Y/N) couldn’t even bring herself to even think about it. Yet, Bella had said it and it had felt like a punch to the gut. Because she had once also said his name with so much enchantment and care, and it made her miss those days. The days when she could call his name and instantly be filled with happiness and excitement.

“I did… I do,” she corrected. “But I don’t want to. That’s why I’ve been trying my hardest to move on, even if it’s just one day at a time. I want to get to the day where when I dream of my future he’s not there. I crave the morning I wake up and my heart doesn’t ache anymore, where I can trust someone else to tell me they love me and mean it. We gave them our hearts, Bella, and they threw it away like it meant nothing. I’m not telling you that you have to move on. But I am telling you that it’s the best idea.”

Bella simply nodded for a second and agreed when (Y/N) offered to get some pizza to fill the silence. Everything that (Y/N) had told her she agreed with, to an extent. If the Cullens weren’t coming back like it seemed they weren’t, then she wanted to take her life back in her control like (Y/N) had. But she couldn’t help the tiny drop of hope she held that they would return, and she could settle into their life as she had done once and fulfill the plans she had made with Edward.

As (Y/N) served herself pizza, Bella sat there, picking at the slice that was on her plate, the words slowly digesting into her system. “Can I ask you something?”

“Sure. Anything.”

“If he had offered to turn you –before everything happened—if he had told you that he would have turned you and asked you to leave with them.” She stared deeply into (Y/N)’s eyes, her tears glistening in the rays of the morning. “Would you have done it? Would you have gone with him?”

“The rational side of me wants to say no. That I would have thought twice about leaving my family and friends again, that I would have given myself a few years to be human and experience life while my heart was still beating,” she chuckled, drying away tears she had not known were pooling until they fell down her cheeks. “But my romantic side, the side that was desperate to be in love, knows I would have agreed just if it meant that I would have him by my side for the rest of my life. I would have given up everything even for just a few years with him.”

“What if he came back? What if he came back and asked for another chance?” Bella was desperate. It was the first time she could ask these questions. The first time she could talk to someone that knew everything and could answer back. “Would you give it to him?”

“That’s a difficult hypothetical, Bella,” (Y/N) laughed. “I think there are too many variables at play for me to know if I would.”

“That’s because you’re thinking with your rational side,” Bella teased slightly, the semblance of a smile playing on her lips. “I’m asking your romantic side. Would that side want Carlisle back?”

(Y/N) kept quiet even though she knew the answer. It was hard to say it out loud. To admit that regardless of how destroyed he had left her that she would want him with every fiber of her being. That if tomorrow he reappeared that she would fall back into his arms and pick things up where they had ended. But it wasn’t fair to her, to the little progress she had made without him.

Still, she was being truthful. “The romantic side would gladly take him back,” she said sadly. “But it’s not just to the side that’s put in the work to not let that happen. What will it say about me that someone could hurt me in the way he did, and I welcomed him back into my life?”

“Oh,” was all Bella responded, her head falling as her skin flushed red.

“Would you take Edward back?”

“I would,” her voice peeped meekly. “I love him too much not to. But I wish I was like you. Maybe it wouldn’t hurt as much.”

“It will still hurt, Bella. It’ll just be easier to act like it doesn’t,” (Y/N) shrugged. “Look, Bella, no one can tell you to move on. If it was that easy, we wouldn’t be here. But you need to at least take the first step. Staying in this room, waiting for the day things just change will not work. It’s on you to start a new journey.”

“Okay,” she sighed. “I know you’re right. It’s just so hard.”

“I know it is. If there’s anyone that knows, it’s me,” she smiled. “But you’re not alone. You have people around you that love and care for you. Let them.”

“I’ve pushed them away. I pushed everyone away.”

“The ones that truly care will still welcome you back. Just take it one day at a time, Bella. But take it out of this room.”

“Thank you, (Y/N). It’s comforting to have someone to talk to so openly about this. Things won’t change quickly, but I’m willing to give it a try.”

“That’s all I’m asking,” (Y/N) said, giving the girl a hug goodbye. “If you need anyone to talk to, don’t hesitate to call, Bella.”

“I will,” she smiled weakly. “Take care of yourself, (Y/N).”

“You too, Bella.” 

(Y/N) couldn’t believe she had confessed to everything she had worked to shove into the deepest corners of her mind. She didn’t want to admit the hold he still had on her. That at any second, he could waltz back into her life, and she would still be as in love with him as the day he had left. It was hard to let those words pass through her lips. Because once they were out, there was no way to sink them back in.  

It was strange and unnerving to hear herself say those words out loud. She had kept these thoughts deeply buried in her brain, scared to ever let them come out. Especially around Sam and Paul. Even if the Cullens had not been their natural-born enemies, she was sure they would have still hated them. More after their patriarch had broken her heart. Other than them, there was no one else she was close to that she could really talk to. They knew everything, and for her to be able to open up completely she needed people who knew everything.

Still, as much as she loved Sam and Paul, they were the least objective people in her life. They were genetically predisposed to not be objective. (Y/N) would go to them for everything else, just nothing that had to do with the Cullens.

But Bella was no better for her. Her scales were tilted toward them. If she took anything from her conversation with the Swan girl was that no matter what they had done, she would forgive them and sink back into their life as if nothing had happened. It was terrifying and just the smallest sliver of extraordinary. Her loyalty to the Cullens transpired her pain. Maybe she knew something (Y/N) didn’t.

As she neared her house, she started burying those thoughts deeper and deeper into her mind, afraid that they were visible on her face. Even if she knew how unrealistic it was –and that the only mind reader she knew was miles away—she couldn’t help the embarrassment that rushed to her skin in shades of red. And if they did, she knew they wouldn’t mention it. At least, not to her face. That much she could expect.

What she didn’t expect was to find Embry Call sitting on her porch. He wore a stressed look on his face, nights of little sleep evident on his face. The boy she knew had always been very happy, quiet but joyous. And though he seemed to be the same happy boy, there was a weight to him that was undeniable.

“Embry,” she called out as she got out of her car. “Is everything okay?”

“Oh, uh, yeah. I guess,” he smiled forcefully. “Well, not exactly.” 

“Why don’t you come in, Em? It’ll be more comfortable to talk.” 

“Sure, thanks.” 

The boy quietly followed her, somehow trying to shrink his 6’4” frame. It was something he did ever since he shifted. The first time he had joined the pack after his first transformation, he had tried to sink into the background as much as he could. The last thing he wanted was to step on anyone’s toes, even if he had been told that he wasn’t.

(Y/N) directed them to the kitchen, quickly setting out drinks and food for the kid, knowing he’d definitely be hungry. “Help yourself to anything,” she said as she noted him sitting on his hands. “Mom still buys food like Sam and his friends come over to ransack our kitchen.” 

“Okay, uh, thanks.” 

“We’re not strangers, Embry,” she smiled kindly. “You can let loose with me.” 

“I’m sorry, it’s just I’m not used to being around other people that aren’t Jake and Quil.” 

“I get that.” She joined him at the kitchen table, sitting before him, a cup of water in her hand. She was all talked out for the evening, but she could see just how much he needed a friend at that moment. “So, what’s going on, kid?” 

“You know we’re only three years apart, right?”

“Still makes me older than you,” she laughed with him. “But, seriously, what’s up?” 

“Honestly, I don’t even know why I’m here,” he chuckled dryly. “I guess ever since I had my first shift I’ve been feeling kinda lonely. Lonely and confused. It took a couple of hours for my whole life to change and now I don’t really have anyone to talk to about it.”

“How are things at home?”

“Well, mom is always angry at me, but at least she’s stopped yelling. Though I don’t know if I like that better,” he responded sadly. She could see he was biting back tears. His lower lip was quivering and his eyes were pooling with water. “I know you weren’t here when it happened, but do you know Ms. Uley took everything?” 

“To this day they don’t really talk. But when I got here, I didn’t understand why my brother wasn’t home or why he and mom were fighting, or even why we couldn’t even spend time together. I knew he was hiding something, and I guess it hurt to think that he didn’t trust me enough to tell me whatever it was,” she recounted. “It’s a strange thing to watch from the outside. I mean, hearing rumors that my older brother, the man that basically took care of me when I was a kid, had started a gang and was recruiting other from the rez was astonishing. It wasn’t something I could even fathom.  But I don’t know how my mother felt when Saam started disappearing or when he moved out. She won’t talk to me about it.”

“He wanted to waive the silence rule for me,” Embry said sheepishly. “After the first week and seeing how hard it was at home, he told me I could tell my mom everything.”

“But you valued why it’s a secret,” she confirmed. "I understand that. And I also understand how lonely being part of the pack is. Especially coming into a place where you essentially know no one. But open yourself up to them. If you let them in, they will do the same. They’re your family now, Em.” 

“I know. I guess it’s just still all so new to me. I’ve been used to the same people my whole life; I’ve known only one truth my whole life, and it all changed.” 

“I hope you don’t mind me asking, but would you ever ask your mom about who your dad is?”

“Don’t think I could ever ask without proving where the suspicions came from,” he shrugged. “Just like everyone here, I was under the impression that my dad was someone from the Makah tribe. She told me that much. But now…”

“That’s okay,” she smiled comfortingly. “But, Embry, I want you to know that regardless of what’s happening at home or with your friends, you’re not alone. You’ve got the pack and you’ve got me, okay? If there’s anything you don’t feel comfortable speaking to them, my door is always open. And if they’re ever giving you shit, I’ll put them in their place. They’re there for you, and so am I. I hope you know that.”

“Thank you, (Y/N),” he smiled brightly, a few tears falling down his outstretched cheeks. “It’s good to know I still have people I can lean on. You’ve always been nice to me, and I don’t know why.” 

“We all need a little kindness from time to time, Embry. I’m just doing my part in it.”

“Well, it’s greatly appreciated. And even if it doesn’t mean anything, I’m also here for you if you need someone to lean on.”

“It means a lot, Em,” she smiled. “More than you know.” 

The more she talked to the people that most needed it, the more she started to believe her own words. Maybe there was light on the other side of this mountain. Maybe (Y/N) would one day see the morning when the thought of him didn’t send a stake through her heart.

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[sarcasticassian]

Easy A AU where word gets out that Steve lost his virginity to an older woman because he told Tommy that he had a date all weekend because he didn’t want to hang out and Tommy just read something between the lines that wasn’t there but now people are looking at Steve like they’re impressed and that he’s even more cool than they thought and it’s weird but it has it’s perks so Steve doesn’t correct him

Well everyone seems impressed apart from Jason Carver and his church buddies, he calls Steve out in class and Steve gets detention when he calls Jason a ‘little fuck’, which isn’t even the worst insult he’s ever thrown but their English teacher has delicate sensibilities and that’s where he meets Robin Buckley

They have fun working through their detention duties together and a couple of days later she turns up at his house asking for him to sleep with her, ‘but not actually sleep with me, that’s gross, but there’s rumours flying around that I’m a lesbian and the last thing I need is to become to town pariah’ and after detention and spending the weekend together at Steve’s empty house they do their stobin soulmate thing and Robin confesses that she has to end the rumours because it’s true, she is a lesbian and so Steve agrees, he turns up at the next kegger with her under his arm and they make a show of finding a spare room and after putting on quite a performance they convince the school they slept together

Steve doesn’t think much of it because he didn’t actually sleep with anyone the first time so not actually sleeping with Robin wasn’t hard either and she helped him get a job with her and made sure to give him a glowing review to the girls at school too so he can’t complain

Things take a turn for the worst when he takes Tammy Thompson on a date, she was nice enough but he wasn’t going to ask her hot again so he took her home, gave her a polite kiss on the cheek and left but she tells everyone at school that they slept together and when he asks her why she spread that around she shrugs and says she wasn’t going to come away from this looking worse than Robin Buckley, which makes Steve mad because there’s nothing wrong with Robin but she just scoffs and walks away

Then it’s Barb Holland coming up to him and telling him she knows what he did for Robin and she was hoping he’d do the same for her, she has a gift card for the local cinema that he could have and it doesn’t even need to be full on sex and he feels bad so he does it and she’s so sweet so he feels okay doing it but the rumours just start to spiral, soon everyone is saying Steve Harrington has slept with them

Even Tommy and Carol call him a slut and that he’s easy, the only person who seems unbothered is Eddie Munson, who Steve has been nursing a crush on for years since they were locked in the closet at a party because the bottle landed on Eddie when Steve spun it and people thought it would be funny if two boys had to play 7 minutes in heaven and Eddie kissed him and Steve loved it but then Eddie asked him not to tell anybody so he didn’t, but now Eddie still gives him a little smile and wave and seems to ignore the rumours that are spreading

Jason has kept at Steve the whole time so Eddie commiserates with him a couple of times because Jason is the bane of his existence too, always trying to ‘save him’ or something and they laugh about it as they smoke behind the school gym and Steve still has butterflies when they talk

Steve is a little upset that throughout all of this he’s never actually been asked on a date because he’d asked Tammy and decided never again so when Nancy Wheeler asks if he wants to go for a milkshake one day he jumps at the chance, they have a nice enough time and it wasn’t life changing but still his heart does sink when she offers him some cash and a little smile but he nods along when she tells him some girls in her class are being mean and calling her a prude and uptight and they won’t leave her alone so he says yes again and she drives off home

He’s wandering back to his own house when Billy Hargrove finds him, he tells Steve he heard that he was having sex for money and how much is it gonna cost to have Steve on his knees and despite trying to tell him to stop and leave him alone, Billy won’t quit, tries to kiss Steve but Steve shoves him off, then Eddie’s van is pulling up and he jumps in without thinking and Eddie offers to take him home

They chat and circle around to that kiss when they were kids and it was both of theirs first kiss and Steve laughs at the irony of never telling anyone about something that actually happened but everyone claiming they’ve slept with him are all telling a lie and Eddie listens, agrees that it’s shitty and when they pull up to Steve’s house he confesses that their kiss is still his favourite and he’d love to do it again and Steve says he would too but not like this, so they wait

Steve is still popular so he’s voted Prom King and he uses his crowning to tell everyone it was all bullshit, he’s still a virgin, he’s never slept with anyone and Robin confirms it, they’re both getting out of Hawkins together so they figure the backlash won’t matter and Steve tosses his crown down and walks out of the building, straight into Eddie’s arms for that promised second kiss

[aeonphantasia]

To all the akuroku shippers (and to my own amusement lol), I made a small summary of all the times Axel and Roxas met and spent time together throughout the KH 358/2 Days game because i feel like the movie version didn't do justice to them. It's a very small outline and i'm already planning to do a more detailed breakdown in the future to showcase how their relationship has changed through that one year. Hope you enjoy it!!

Also, I want to dedicate this to all the akuroku fans out there who have written beautiful fics about these two. I know there's an akrk discord where you meet and discuss about them. I made this for you, for reference if you want as a thanks for all your wonderful works!!! (I would tag you all but i'm a bit shy, so you know who you are!)

n.b. the days marked with a ! indicate an important milestone in their relationship.

PART 1 - here.

!DAY 255 - THE LONGEST DAY Axel meets Xion in C.O. and asks her to leave and forget everything. Axel meets Roxas for ice cream. (This is where the famous ‘why the sun sets red’ scene happens). Roxas wonders about Xion. Axel lies and tells him she is on an important mission. Roxas feels Axel is not being entirely honest and he too seems like is not himself. Xion finds the truth about herself. 

!DAY 256 - NEWS Org.XIII has a meeting discussing Xion who has left. Xemnas forbids anyone to go look for her. Roxas is disheartened. After his mission he is alone eating ice cream. Roxas wishes Axel would be there with him. Axel stands hidden in silence on the clocktower, observing Roxas. 

!DAY 257 - HOLLOW Roxas sits alone on the clocktower. He’s sad. Wonders where his friends are. Roxas seems sure Axel is avoiding him. 

DAY 276 - DISORDER After a long time, Axel joins Roxas on the clocktower. Axel resolves they will go look for Xion the next day. Axel is worried about Xion too.

DAY 277 Brief meeting in the morning. Roxas looks for Xion. 

DAY 278 Brief meeting in the morning. Roxas looks for Xion. 

!DAY 296 - CONFESSIONS Brief meeting in the morning. Later, Roxas and Axel sit on the clocktower. Roxas wants to look for Xion in C.O. Axel confesses that’s where Xion comes from. 

!DAY 297 - CONTACT Axel and Roxas go to C.O. Roxas collapses. He wakes up next to Axel in Twilight Town. They briefly see Xion but she runs away. Roxas questions her actions. Axel seems reluctant. 

!DAY 298 - FRACTURE Roxas witnesses Saix ordering Axel to bring Xion back with force, considering her a traitor. Axel promises he won’t hurt her. Roxas has been ordered to find the impostor (Riku). During his mission he finds Xion and begs her to come back, which she refuses. After trying to grab her, she summons her keyblade. Axel, who was secretly witnessing the scene, charges towards Xion and they have a fight which Roxas tries to stop. Axel knocks Xion unconscious and brings her back to the castle. Roxas catches up to him asking for an explanation and accusing him of not keeping his promise not to hurt her. Axel remains indifferent. Roxas is cross with Axel.

!DAY 299 - SORA Roxas learns from Xemnas about Sora. When he’s greeted by Axel, he ignores him. Axel keeps ignoring his guilt towards Roxas and the lies he’s telling him, convincing himself that that’s what being a nobody means. Yet, he feels something is not right. ‘Roxas doesn't trust me after the whole Xion incident, but I can't tell him the truth yet. So I keep lying. It's no big deal when you're a Nobody. There's no guilt, no feeling at all. So why does it still sting, just a little, when I lie to him? All my dealings with Roxas give me this bizarre illusion of humanity.’

!DAY 300 - SHUTDOWN Axel and Xion join Roxas for ice cream. None of them speak a word.

!DAY 301 - VACANT PLACE Roxas eats ice cream alone. He starts feeling tired. Axel doesn’t know how to talk to Roxas. 

!DAY 321 - WANING POWER Roxas and Xion have ice cream together. Roxas complains about the way Axel treated Xion and he’s mad at him as far as calling him ‘jerk’, which takes Xion aback. She (very sweetly) explains to him that if it wasn’t for Axel she wouldn’t be here with him now. Roxas is still cross. (The little dialogue they have is actually very sweet and emphasizes my HC that Xion is very aware of the feelings Axel and Roxas have for each other.) Roxas: I can't believe that jerk would actually attack you. Xion: So he's a jerk now? (Roxas says nothing) Xion: Roxas, I wouldn't be sitting here with you if Axel hadn't done that. (Roxas still says nothing) Xion: He's your best friend. Roxas: So are you. Later, Xion meets with Axel. She is worried about Roxas, and Axel tells her (very rudely) it’s because she is absorbing his powers. Once again, Axel states that they are best friends and can’t take decisions on her behalf. 

DAY 322 Roxas has ice cream on his own and wishes he can meet with his friends again like before. 

DAY 324 Roxas has ice cream alone. 

!DAY 352 - SUNSET Brief meeting in the morning. Axel is worried about Roxas. During his mission, Roxas fights a powerful nobody. Just before the final attack Axel appears and stops the fight revealing the mission to be a setup: Xion and Roxas were actually fighting each other. Later they eat ice cream together. They enjoy their time together and Roxas proposes the three of them to run off so they can always be together. Roxas promises to never forget these memories. ‘Me and Xion and Axel had ice cream. The sunset was beautiful.I don't have to write anything else down, because I'll never forget this day.’

!DAY 353 - RESOLVE After his mission, Roxas is back at the castle. He learns that Xion has disappeared again and Axel let her go without stopping her. Finally, Axel tells Roxas the truth about Xion and how he would trade her to save Roxas’ life. Roxas is very upset. He thinks he can’t trust Axel anymore. (I cannot NOT include their dialogue because it is extremely powerful and emotional). Roxas: What happened out there? Axel: Look, nothing. Roxas: Xion's gone! How is that nothing? Axel: It's just like Xigbar said. I couldn't stop her from going. Roxas: Don't give me that! Why not? Axel (crossing his arms): Roxas... Xion is like a mirror that reflects you. Roxas: What? Axel: The Organization made her to duplicate your powers. She's a puppet Roxas: Have you gone nuts? Xion's a person, not a puppet. Axel: She's smoke and mirrors, Roxas. And when I looked in the mirror... It wasn't you I saw. Roxas: I don't know what you're talking about, but Xion is Xion. You can't expect her to be me. Axel: That's not what I mean, Roxas. It was only a matter of time before somebody had to break the mirror. Roxas: You mean destroy her. (Axel looks away) Roxas: Answer me! Axel: Roxas, if somebody doesn't, you'll... You won't be you anymore. Roxas: I'll always be me! Your best friend--just like Xion! Axel (shaking his head): Roxas, you're...you're not seeing the bigger picture. Any of it. Roxas: Ugh, forget this. (Roxas starts to leave) Axel: Roxas! (He runs away) Axel: Why can't you understand…

!DAY 354 - TRUTH Org.XIII has a meeting. Xemnas orders Axel to capture Xion once again. Roxas is against it. He is angry at Axel for keeping the truth from him for so long. Roxas wonders if he is a puppet too. 

!DAY 355 - UNSAID, UNHEARD Roxas meets Axel and the two have a bad confrontation. (Again, I’ll let their dialogue do the talking. This is the best piece of writing of the entire game. I call this ‘The Break-up’). Roxas: Axel. Axel: Hey, Roxas. (They stand silent for a moment) Roxas: You find Xion? Axel: Like it's gonna be that easy. Roxas: I know… (Axel says nothing) Roxas: Have you been keeping the truth about her from me this whole time? Axel: ...Not the whole time. Roxas: When did you find out? Axel: Oh, I dunno. Somewhere along the way. Roxas: Didn't get it memorized, huh? Axel... Who am I, really? (Axel says nothing) Roxas: I'm special, like Xion. I know that. (Axel remains silent) Roxas: But the Organization wanted me out of the picture. Axel: Yeah... They did. Roxas: Is it because Xion copied by Keyblade and they didn't need me anymore? (Axel continues to say nothing) Roxas: And you feel the same way. Axel: No, you've got that part wrong. You'll always be my best friend. Roxas: Best friends are honest with each other! Who am I, Axel? (Axel looks away) Roxas: Xemnas said me and Xion are connected to Sora. Who is that? Tell me! Am I a puppet like Xion? Axel: No… Roxas: What, then? Axel: You really think the truth is going to make you feel better? It won't. Roxas: What makes you so sure? I have a right to know who I am! How did I get here? Why am I special? Where did I learn to use the Keyblade? I deserve those answers! Axel: Roxas… Roxas (sighing): Are you gonna tell me or not? Axel... Who am I? Axel: You've just gotta trust me, Roxas. (He turns around) Roxas: I don't. Axel: Hey, c'mon… Roxas: If I can't get answers here, I'll get them somewhere else. Somebody knows where I came from. That'll be the person I trust.

Roxas leaves. Outside of the Castle, they meet one more time. Axel: Your mind's made up? (He stops) Roxas: Why did the Keyblade choose me? I have to know. Axel: You can't turn on the Organization! You get on their bad side, and they'll destroy you! Roxas: No one would miss me. (He walks away) Axel: That's not true... I would.

DAY 356 - PLACE TO BELONG Axel meets Xion and they fight. Axel brings Xion back and then he collapses from fatigue. 

!DAY 357 - TEARS Roxas and Xion fight. Xion disappears into the light. Axel finds an envelope. Inside, there’s a ‘WINNER’ stick. 

-END.

[connmmor]

There’s a floating island in the sky taunting Jimmy.

Well, he’s not sure if it’s taunting, considering it’s decently far from Tumble Town. But it still feels taunting, with a fountain carefully crafted in quartz and detailed to perfection with bits and pieces of pure gold. It shines under the bright sun of the server, and illuminates the beauty of the rest of floating islands, and the growing town below.

Perfect for the God that resides above him.

Jimmy’s not sure why he decided to visit Joel in the first place. Sure, he needed to talk about–it–but he could’ve gone to Scott.

Or, maybe he couldn’t have. He’s been unapproachable since his return, as if he’s so close to crumbling under the weight of his own demise.

He honestly could've gone to Lizzie, considering the fact that she was there for Last Life–but that’s not the same. She didn’t actually know what it was like, being tied to another. Being responsible for their future doom.

Or, maybe she did. Jimmy had no way of knowing.

So, he opted for the only logical person, which was somehow Joel.

Right now, it didn’t matter if they were on rocky terms. Jimmy didn’t want to actually label Joel as his enemy, not yet at least, so maybe there was time to halt that progression.  But the only problem standing between that was that–Jimmy had no way to get up there. Sure, he had wings. Bright yellow and preened to what he called perfection, with feathers that reflected the flaming shine of the sun, but he couldn’t use them yet. He hadn’t acquired an elytra yet.

And, server rules are server rules, even if he is the law.

He takes a few steps back from underneath the island, and paces around the outskirts of its shadow. He’s looking for anything, really, maybe a bubble elevator or just a simple ladder, but he ultimately finds nothing. So it pains him when he cups his hands over his mouth and shouts,

“Joel!”

There’s silence for a bit, until a figure appears at the edge of the island, with a white tunic–detailed in gold and brown. Jimmy can already makeout the hems, and whatever little story Joel has stitched into them.

And, Jimmy won’t admit it to Joel, but he looks menacing from up there. Joel’s tall figure casts a shadow directly over Jimmy, and for a moment he forgets to speak when Joel arches a brow, waiting for him

Jimmy licks his lips.

“I wanna talk!”

Joel scoffs at that, crosses his arms and turns around to take a quick glance at his Islands before he turns back down to Jimmy with a shrug.

“Can you fly yet?” He asks, and he doesn’t even have to yell, his voice carries enough power for Jimmy to hear him.

Jimmy flushes, and there’s an embarrassing twitch in his wings.

“Not yet, no,” He shouts, a bit weak. To his surprise, Joel doesn’t straight up mock him. There’s a taunting grin, but that’s all, and it’s shocking.

Joel’s doing a number on him here.

“Okaay..” Joel says after a second, and he grabs something from a nearby chest. It’s thin and wooden, and a quick realization settles in Jimmy’s stomach.

“You are not rodding me up there, do you hear?” He shouts, quickly stepping back in an attempt to get out of range. He probably already was, but at this point he has no idea with Joel.

“Well, how else are you meant to get up here?” Joel quips, his brows furrowing together.

“I–I don’t know! Put some water maybe?”

Joel stares at him, deadpan.

“Haven’t got any,”

“You're a liar. There’s a whole fountain behind you!”

“Doesn’t mean I can just take it out. It angers the Gods, Jimmy, gosh. Think for a moment before you throw out a useless idea.”

Jimmy’s left eye twitches. He really should deem Joel an enemy.

“Give me some wings, I know you have ‘em.”

“Gave them to Katherine and Scott. And they’re all broken.” Joel replies easily.

Damn him, really!

“Then come get me! Is that too much to ask?” Joel takes a deep, bored breath.

“It might be,”

“Oh my Gods.” Jimmy spits, and that racks out a laugh from Joel.

“Okay, okay–fine.”

And then Joel falls from the edge without hesitation, edging closer and closer to the lush ground before a pair of bright wings extend from his back and lessen his fall. They–don’t exactly look like the wings Jimmy’s seen before. They’re made of light, glowing bright yellow and motionless on Joel’s back. They form wings, sure, wings that attach to nothing yet form something beautiful.

It’s about as Godly as they could be.

“Well, first, what do you want?”

“To talk. I said that.”

“Yeah. About what?” Joel questions, staring down at him. Screw whatever higher being thought to make him a ridiculously tall God. They were messed up for that one.

Here’s where Jimmy begins to question if he can actually tell Joel anything. Sure, they were both there, but it wasn’t the same experience. Whatever Joel endured was coaxed in bloodlust and hunger, an awful sense of forgetting yourself attached to it, meanwhile Jimmy just craved the idea of living, with someone who actually wanted him. Someone who didn’t just see him as the cursed canary, someone who saw him as that and so much more.

Jimmy’s boots click together, nervously, and the spurs attached to them make a small noise that Joel glances at before looking at Jimmy again. His eyes are the color of honey, golden brown, swirling with what immense power resides in him.

“About–you know, the–” He shrinks a bit, and something in Joel’s demeanor shifts. “The Life Server.” Jimmy says, quietly, as if someone is listening and he’s not supposed to mention it.

Joel stares with the same hard expression, only for it to drop with a sigh. He drags his hand across his face, opting to scratch his large beard for a moment before shaking his head in defeat.

“Fine.”

He holds his hand out to Jimmy, and Jimmy takes it after a moment of hesitation. They’re rough, with ripped skin and calluses that Jimmy can only assume is from building, and he silently admires just how much work Joel puts into everything, even if he’s the most annoying man he’s ever met.

They grip onto each other tightly, and within seconds Joel is up in the air again, Jimmy being pulled along with him with a startled noise. His wings press tightly against his back, because he wouldn’t hear the end of it if he accidentally threw them off course by anxiously flapping them around, and his eyes are screwed shut. He’s not scared of flying, not at all, but he’s scared of Joel flying.

But then they land without problem, right next to the giant fountain Jimmy could see from below. The quartz is blinding, and almost out of instinct does Jimmy reach out to touch it, but he stops and looks at Joel.

Joel shrugs, arms crossed over his chest.

“Go for it, it’s not that sacred,”

Jimmy touches the rimming of the fountain, and even through his leather gloves he can feel the ridges and bumps of the details molded into them. The water shines inside, and as much as Jimmy would love to also touch that, he doesn’t.

“What is it then?” Joel suddenly asks him, and Jimmy snaps out of whatever haze he’s in, forcing his eyes away from the water.

“Huh?”

“The Life Server. What about it.”

And that’s when Jimmy realizes Joel doesn’t want to talk about that place either.

He frowns a bit,

“I–actually, we don’t have to talk about it if you don’t want to.” Jimmy tells him, and Joel pauses to take a slow breath and look anywhere else but at Jimmy.

“No, we can. It’s just a bit weird to be thinking about it now.”

They’re, sort of getting somewhere.

“Why?”

Joel makes a face. Scrunched up and almost confused, before he waves his hand with a huff.

“Because when you go from being something so powerless to this you wonder if there’s anything you could’ve done to stop it. Or if they could’ve stopped it.”

Jimmy knows who he’s talking about.

The Watchers that play the game, hiding among them, pretending they aren’t obvious.

The Listener who follows along, only waiting for the right moment.

And The Star.

“Or maybe that’s just my crisis. I have no idea what you would want. You played your role.”

And that Jimmy did.

“I didn’t want to, you know. I wanted to win,”

“Unfortunately, that’s not going to happen and you know it.”

Joel doesn’t say it as an insult, nor does he say it just to be hurtful. He says it as a fact, a sick and twisted one that even Joel doesn’t like, but they all know it. There’s no way to actually save Jimmy.

“I know.”

There's silence that follows, with the exception of rustling leaves and bushes as the wind blows past them, around the islands as if it draws it in.

“I want to see Tango,” Jimmy blurts out, and that’s when Joel gets sick. He rolls his eyes and scoffs, gripping his arms in their crossed position.

He’s only acting that way because of Etho.

“The Hermits haven’t contacted any of us at all.” Joel reminds Jimmy. It’s bitter when he says it, but something twists in Jimmy’s stomach.

“Have you contacted Etho? Or Grian?” Jimmy argues.

“Oh, multiple times.” Joel quips sourly. “I commed Etho right after we got sent back home, same with Grian, and got nothing.”

“Well, okay but–” “Scott commed Pearl every single day and got nothing. Why do you think he’s cooped up in Chromia?”

“I..kinda thought he was just reeling back from winning.”

Joel raises a brow.

“You think he won?”

“Didn’t he?”

“He says he didn’t. So I’m following what he says.”

“Oh.”

Jimmy stills. He’s toying with the space left at the fingertips of his gloves. He wants to rip them apart.

“I still want to see Tango,” He says after a moment, and Joel lolls his head and stares at him.

“Really?”

“Yeah. No offense, but he’s the only person who’s relatively nice to me,”

“I am so nice to you. You’re crazy.”

Jimmy’s eye twitches once more.

“Let’s not get into how miserable you make me.” He hisses, and Joel grins a bit and shoves his shoulder.

“Well, I’m not your mum or anything. If you want to see him tell Fwhip but, I wouldn’t bother.”

“Is that how stubborn you are? What if–somethings wrong. That’s why they can’t talk to us,”

“Hermitcraft is crawling with Gods and Redstoners who could fix it in a heartbeat. If they wanted to talk to their soulbounds, they would.”

“Soulmates.” Jimmy corrects, “You never really called it soulbound.”

Joel shrugs, unamused.

“Just–try to see it from my side,” Jimmy starts, and surprisingly, Joel gives him a look that shows he’s listening. Sure, he might forget every word that Jimmy says as soon as he speaks, but at least he listened. “Tango and I were great–I mean, did you see the Ranch? The animals?”

“Shame it got burnt down. Twice.”

Jimmy groans, “I know! We worked so hard on everything, we risked our lives for that Warden.” Then, Jimmy softens, and for a moment he’s not really the Sheriff from Tumble Town. Right now, he’s just Jimmy Solidarity from Empires, who misses Tango more than anything. It  burns. “I brought home a bunch of cows on the first or second day. He called me amazing. Me, amazing, can you believe that?” Jimmy says gently. “He built our ranch, and regardless of what he said I thought it was the best ranch I’ve ever seen. The warden thing was all him–I can’t even begin to imagine how he rigged everything up to send it to the surface. He was gone for hours, and he actually did it, just like he said he would.”

Jimmy licks his lips. There’s a flush in his cheeks he’s wildly unaware of, but Joel sees it.

“I was told he was easy to anger. Bdubs said it took four people and multiple hours to calm him down in Last Life–and maybe it’s vain to think this way but, I calmed him down. I don’t know how, but I did, and it was just me and him with everything burning, even him, and I still did it. I did a lot of things I had never done before with him.”

Joel snickers at his side, and the flush in Jimmys face quickly darkens.

“Like–normal things! You sick man!” Jimmy shouted, shoving Joel's arm. The God only laughed, in a way that seemed passive, not directed at Jimmy’s rambling. He held onto Joel’s arm for the moment, watching him come down from his fit, and looking at him.

“Jimmy, if you like him that much, you should see him.”

“..Okay. I will.”

Joel grins at him.

“That’s what you wanted, right? Someone to tell you to go. I told you earlier.”

Jimmy swallows.

“Well, maybe, but I wanted it without the ‘I wouldn’t bother’ bit.” Jimmy admits.

Joel hums a bit, taps his finger against his arm and lets out a small, quiet laugh.

“Jimmy, when it comes to love, you shouldn’t need someone telling you. You just have to go and do what you want to do. I have my grudges, Scott has his–I was only telling you because you don’t really deserve that kind of hurt, but Tango’s different, I guess, so I’m just..gonna encourage you at this point.”

“This is the nicest you’ve ever been to me.”

“Oh please, I’m nice to you. You’re just never around.”

Jimmy squawks, and it warrants another laugh from Joel who waves him off as he approaches another chest. He unlatches it, and digs, until he pulls out something gray and bulky, a purple shimmer to it.

When he comes back to Jimmy, he pushes it into his hands.

“Don’t tell Scott. Or Katherine. I gave them broken ones.”

Jimmy gapes, taking the elytra from Joel’s hands and letting them sit heavy in his own. They glow, before disappearing into a purple wisp and flowing straight into Jimmy’s canary wings, giving them flight for the first time in ages.

“I’m not stopping you, Jimmy, just go see him.”

And nothing stops Jimmy from flying.

[elizabethblake]

That’s for me to know and for you to figure out - pt.11

Panic Imagine -- Dodge Mason x OC (Reese Silvers) -- pt.11

A girl from a wealthy family wants to get out of Carp just as much as everyone else. With the new guy in town, she seems to be a bit more distracted than she had hoped. And those who once were her friends just may be the ones who will throw her into the deep end. Will panic be what she hopes, or will she fall into the depths of deceit and lies?

“Luke Hall is taking bets on Panic. That’s why he’s back in town.” Heather said as she sat on my bed.

“To track the game?” I asked. 

“Or to fix it.” She said.

“Fix it?” I asked. 

“Reese think about it, he was at the jump last year. He graduated years ago, isn’t it a little bit weird that he comes back the same summer that two of the leading players die in like freak accidents? That really seems like one hell of a coincidence.” She said. 

“Yeah, both Jimmy and Abby’s deaths are connected to the game, but if Luke is taking bets. Then maybe he’s connected to them too.” I said. 

“Look, I gotta get home but I’ll call you later okay.” She said before leaving.

After Heather left I headed over to Dodge’s place. I walked up and knocked on the door.

“Hey can we talk?” I asked as he answered it.

“Sure, come in.” He said and we made our way to his room. 

“What is it?” He asked. 

“Heather says people are gambling on Panic.” I said.

“Some of them are putting $10,000, $20,000 on each challenge. They think Luke might be in charge.” I added.

“Hmm.” Dodge hummed.

“You’re not surprised.” I said. 

“Because you knew didn’t you?” I asked. 

“Yeah.” He said, pinching the bridge of his nose.

“Cortez suspected ever since he found out about Panic, but he didn’t know enough about the game or how it worked in order to build a case so um he needed a way in.” He said and I scoffed.

“So you’ve been helping him?” I asked. 

“He wants Luke in jail. This is the only way.” He said. 

“Oh okay, so what you’ve been like spying on us this whole time?” I asked. 

“No, I’ve been trying to win.” He said. 

“How does that help Cortez?” I asked.

“It’s not illegal to gamble in Texas okay. But it is a felony to be the house that’s how we’re going to catch him. If I win, we can prove that Luke is getting a kickback as the bookie. That’s what Cortez needs.” He said. 

“So you’re doing this for revenge?” I asked. 

“Cause Heather told me about your sister. I’m not mad that you lied to me, I’m just curious as to why you thought you couldn’t tell me. I told you everything about what happened and you still kept it from me. But it’s really none of my business I guess.” I said. 

“I’m playing for Dayna.” He said. 

“Yeah. I get that. But you lied Dodge, repeatedly. And I just. I can’t trust someone who lies.” I said as I turned around to leave. 

“Reese.” He said. 

“No. I’m out of Panic. I’m done, our alliance is over there’s nothing else to it.” I said. 

“Really? Was sleeping with me just part of the alliance too?” He asked. 

“No. And you know that. But this mess with Cortez, I don’t want any part of it. I’m trying to burn my broken bridges and go down with them and if any of this gets caught up with me it’s going to be a shit show. So I am sorry Dodge but I can’t have anything to do with Panic anymore.” I said before I left. 

When I got home I noticed my brother’s car and made my way inside.

“Hey, didn’t think you’d be home.” I said. 

“Yeah, haven’t been out much lately.” He said and there was a silent pause.

“Rhett, I’m out of Panic. I got eliminated.” I said, and his eyes shot up to meet mine. 

“I swear to you, I’m gonna get the money. I will help you find a way.” I said and he only sighed.

“Reese, this isn’t your fight you need to quit trying so hard. I got us into this, you weren’t even supposed to be involved in this.” He said. 

“But I am. And if you don’t find the money Rhett. He is gonna kill you.” I said. 

“Maybe not.” He said.

“Maybe we could go to the cops see if Cortez can help.” He said. 

“Thats a bad idea, the cops won’t help if they know why you were there and Cortez is dirty Rhett.” I said. 

“What do you mean?” He asked. 

“Cortez is trying to pin something on Luke, something big. But I know Luke didn’t do it.” I said. 

“What?” He asked. 

“On Halloween 3 years, Dodge’s sister was in a hit and run and it left her paralyzed. Cortez has Dodge convinced it was Luke who hit her but I know it wasn’t.” I said. 

“I was with Ray on Halloween that year. It was freshman year, Ray wouldn’t shut up about how his brother was sitting in jail for some stupid thing that he did. But he was in jail, he wasn’t out roaming the streets and hitting people and driving off.” I said. 

“So what? Maybe Cortez got it wrong.” Rhett said.

“Cortez would know Luke was in jail that night, he would’ve already looked into where he was. That would be the first thing, which means I think Cortez is dirty.” I said. 

“Just stay out of it. Don’t get yourself caught Reese.” He said before leaving, but then stopped. 

“Oh this letter was on the porch when I got home.” He said, picking up an envelope with my name written in bold and handed it to me. 

“Thanks” I said, and he left the room. I opened the envelope and a paper was inside. 

TUMBLEWEED MAZE 10PM. ASSIST DODGE IN HIS TASK RULES DOWN BELOW

“Shit.” I muttered. 

I pulled up to the place around 9:45 pm and after about 10 minutes I saw Dodge’s car pull up. 

“What the hell?” He asked as he got out of his car. 

“You’re the welcome committee?” He asked. 

“I guess so.” I said. 

“At least you don’t have to pay for admission.” I added and began walking. 

“Tumbleweed maze? I’m almost offended.” Dodge said. 

“Judges...they’re looking for a specific key. Find it and you’re in. You have one hour. And keep it moving, because every minute you spend looking, well that’s just another point you won’t get.” I said. 

“In three, two, one.” I counted down and he walked towards the barn. 

The next morning we were told to meet at the motor lodge, when I pulled up I went inside and saw that most everyone was already there, I walked over and sat at the table with Heather. 

“Hey.” I said. 

“Hey.” She said. 

“I’m sorry you got out.” She said. 

“It’s all good, Sorry about you too.” I said. 

“Friends, players, former contestants, the results of the individual challenges have been tallied. All the points have been scored. Shawna quit, so she’s out of the game. Dodge is in first place and will be heading to the Joust. The player competing against him is as yet undetermined.” Diggins said. 

“What?! Why?” Ray asked. 

“I mean I stayed long enough in that shithole cooler, didn’t I?” Ray asked. 

“Not long enough to beat Dodge’s time” Summer said.

“The individual challenges aren’t done yet Ray. By order of the judges, Natalie Williams is disqualified for reasons of false representation and failure to complete the required challenges. As punishment the player’s points have been retroactively invalidated.” Diggins said. 

“English please?” Drew asked. 

“The judges wiped Natalies score because she cheated.” Diggins added and Ray laughed.

“She was never in Spurlock’s house. Shouldn’t have even made it to Graybill let alone the final four.” Diggins said. 

“That’s, that’s bullshit. All right that’s hearsay” Nat said.  

“True. We heard you say it.” Summer said.

“That’s a good one Summer.” Nat clapped back.

“No you admitted it in your video that you trapped me underground. That’s nowhere near the house, right?” Heather said.

“Plus someone ratted you out to the judges.” Diggins said. 

“All right, fuck you guys.” Nat said before getting up and leaving.

“You were outside watching the house, Dodge covered for you.” Diggins said, and I turned to look at Dodge. 

“What?” I whispered to Heather and she shrugged her shoulders.

“Wait hold on hold on hold on, wait a second. If Dodge helped Natalie get through the last challenge then why is he still playing?” Ray asked.

“Well he was stealing for two, lucky he didn’t get double the points.” Summer said and people started talking over each other.

“All right settle down, settle down. At the time of the judge’s selection of the Final Three, excluding Natalie, the players in order were Dodge, Ray, and Heather.” Diggins said, and I turned to look at heather with a open smile on my face.

“But Heather missed a challenge.” Drew said. 

“Well she still has her immunity.” Summer said. 

“Given that and Natalie’s disqualification, an exception has been made. Congratulations Heather, the judges ruled you may move on to your individual challenge. Good Luck.” Diggins said. 

As we were leaving I walked out with Heather. 

“Holy fucking shit. This is amazing.” I said to her. 

“I’m so nervous.” She said. 

“Heather this is your chance to win. You have to do everything you can.” I said. 

“And I’m sorry about Nat. She’s a bitch.” I said which made her laugh a little. 

“Looks like it’s down to you and me for joust.” Ray shouted, and I rolled my eyes. 

“I’ll leave you to it.” I said to her as I walked away and headed home.

Later once I was home the doorbell rang and I went downstairs to get it.

“Dodge.” I said as I opened the door. 

“What can I do for you?” I asked. 

“Can I come in?” He asked. 

“Sure.” I said. 

“I’m sorry about before. I’m sorry we argued.” He said. 

“It’s fine. Honestly don’t worry about it.” I said. 

“I’m sorry Natalie screwed you over. I could’ve warned you on that part.” I said. 

“Look I know you’re all set on trying to help Cortez take down Luke Hall but I think you’re exhausting your efforts.” I said. 

“I didn’t come to talk about that.” He said as he walked closer to me as I leaned against the counter in the kitchen.

“Looking back on it, we never really had an alliance did we?” I asked. 

“What do you mean?” He asked. 

“You were always working with Natalie. Trying to get ahead, but I didn’t know. So we never really had an alliance because I couldn’t really trust you even if I didn’t know it.” I said. 

“Did you ever really like me? Or was it a ploy?” I asked. 

“Reese I never would have planned out to get close to you and sleep with you to get an advantage over you in Panic.” He said, sounding a bit hurt that I would suggest that. 

“You suggested it at one point.” I said. 

“I didn’t mean it.” He said.

“I know.” I said. 

“You know, I really did like you Dodge. A lot.” I said.

“Did? As in you don’t anymore.” He said, twisting his lips to the side. 

“So much has happened in so little time, this summer has been crazy but the one thing i’ve managed to keep constant is you.” I said. 

“So no Dodge I didn’t sleep with you because of our alliance, I didn’t just magically erase the feelings I have for you, but things are crazy and if we aren’t on the same page. We cannot do this.” I said. 

“How do we get on the same page Reese? I’m trying.” He said. 

“Cortez is dirty. Plain and simple, you cannot trust him.” I said. 

“I’ll keep my eye out I promise.” He said. 

“And from now on, I’ll tell you everything going on, no more secrets.” He said. 

“Good.” I said, I then leaned in and kissed him, running my hand to the back of his neck. His hand snaked around my waist as he pulled me into him. I broke the kiss only a moment to speak. 

“My brother is home just so you know to keep the volume down to a minimum.” I said, lacing my fingers with his I lead him upstairs and into my room. 

I slipped on my shirt and pants as Dodge put his on. 

“You know Joust is like a big thing in Panic.” I said, sitting back down on the bed and facing him.

“I know.” He said. 

“I’m worried.” I said.

“I am too.” He stated, rubbing his thumb over the back of my hand.

“I’ve gotta go, but I’ll meet up with you later okay?” He asked. 

“Okay.” I said with a smile and he leaned down to kiss me before heading out the door and downstairs to leave. 

After a little while, I heard arguing through the floor and I went out to see what was going on. 

“Do you know how dangerous this is Rhett? You could be killed, you could get your sister killed for god’s sake.” I heard my dad shout.

“Dad?” I asked as I made my way downstairs.

“Reese, why didn’t you tell me about any of this? This is crazy you know better, you both know better.” He snapped.

“Dad I can explain.” I said softly.

“So you do know how bad this is.” He said.

“George.” My mom said.

“No Lemon, you were right in your motion to try and send her off to boarding school. It would have been for her own good, because now she decided to help her dumb ass of a brother get out of situation he ain’t ever shoulda been in to begin with.” He yelled.

“Daddy it’s not as bad as you think.” I tried to reason.

“I always told you that Hall boy was no good for you darlin’“ He said.

“I’m takin this to the cops.” He said.

“No dad you can’t.” I said as I ran to the door. 

“Why Reese.” He asked.

“There is so much that you don’t know okay, but you can’t trust them.” I said.

“At least not Cortez.” I added.

“You’re not makin any sense honey.” My mom said.

“Cortez is dirty okay. He is caught up in bets that are bein made on Panic. I don’t know if he is in on them but if he is it means he’s got his eyes glued on me and everyone else in this stupid game so we cannot trust him. He is trying to take Luke Hall out, and if we aren’t careful he is going to find out what happened and we are all gonna go sinking down with that ship.” I said.

“You’re going to tell us everything.” He said.

[mrsmess]

falafel

the way you were just there at that hole in the wall when you shouldn’t even have been there at all and neither should I, but there I was just because my kid got out early and it was a toss between going home or staying in town we rarely get out, we should hang around let’s go get a falafel it’s the only city in the country where you can get a decent one for reasonable money it’s easily done so we gotta get a falafel and sit outside in the setting sun it’s not a big city on a international scale and I’m bad at math it's the one class I failed but there are three hundred thousand people living here and that’s a lot or at least enough so the chance of running into someone you know is not that high or even there but you were there and so was I I was stunned even when you said my name before you told me chance is why you came

a motorcycle thundered by you said I hate that and I said why are you sitting by a heavily trafficked street in a city where you don’t even stay and told my kid of the place where you live it’s real pretty but real far away I went to visit you there when I was nineteen and in a relationship with a boy who was mean and who tagged along and sulked the whole time but your wife was really kind to me and you don’t appreciate that when you’re young and blind you spoke to my kid in that way of yours you’re really good with them which is of course obvious that you’d be when you work as much as you do with them we ate our falafel, spilled food everywhere and loud, obnoxious music filled up the air you told my kid about your girls who where in a big contest the other year my kid said I don’t remember them I always root for the old, bald men I smiled and told you you should enter the contest then but you already did back when I was a kid and you sang that cheesy song with your awful ex wife you were on television but out of my life

next thing I know we’re in your car, you say you have to drive me home and I let you because that’s what we are to each other even if it’s been years since I met you you say you’ve thought about me and I say I think about you all the time too but leave out all my mixed feelings because we’re in a car and driving fast and I already know the moment won’t last we won’t have time enough to discuss the important stuff when are we supposed to? you ask about mom and I say she’s good even if she’s waiting for surgery for some reason at sixty miles per hour I commit perjury I remember when you left and how she cried even if she said she didn’t love you right I talk about my dad, and you say who is your dad again? it’s a joke because my dad is no more a father to me than other men my grandpa for example tried to fill his shoes and you at one point though that was a game you could only lose but you don’t mention yourself in this equation even if you were part of the situation and maybe neither of you were to blame but in this one crucial way you’re all the same Grandpa was too old, you were too young and my daddy was simply too far gone all of you went away for too long

my kid talks in the backseat and I try to divide my attention and give you direction at one point you almost miss an exit and say something sarcastic about my instruction in an infuriatingly ironic tone of voice when neither then nor now gave me a choice I did not ask to be put in this seat and for a beat I’m convinced that you have some feelings to work through regarding me and my mom, some residue and also that I would be willing to do that with you if you would only ask me to but you won’t and I don’t expect you to come in when we’re parked and I invite you to come through as expected you say no and that it’s time to go and maybe you don’t care or you do but don’t think it’s fair to share because to you I’m still four and either way you stack the years you’ll always have seventeen more when we met we were really just two kids at different ages now we’re adults at different grieving stages

I get out of the car, say thanks for the ride and give my love to your spouse and I take my kid’s hand and head for our house I want to say I love you and hate you and why did you abandon me? instead I swallow the sting and cling to common sense laugh about the crazy coincidence like that and destiny isn’t the same thing

[countrymusiclover]

22 - Three Words Longed For

Part 23

Gemini Runaway

Warning - mature content in this chapter. 18 +, don't read past the red warning if you are not comfortable

Tag list ask to be added @secretdreamlandmentality ( @dragonixfrye ) - thank you for helping write this chapter. Please go check out her books on Wattpad.

Blinking my eyes opened I immediately screamed bolting from the bed throwing around everything I could with my magic. The glass of the window shattered against my hands and I broke every light in the room. “I’m gonna kill him….I don’t care if it kills me. Agrrrh!”

Someone vamped into the room where I shot my hand forward seeing Bex grabbing her head wincing at me. “Rae!”

“Bex, I…I’m sorry.” I quickly dropped my arm not meaning to hurt her. Clutching my hands into fists immediately crying knowing that I will never hear him say name ever again.

She reached up with her hand squeezing my shoulder, holding in tears herself. “Raelyn, I’m sorry for not letting you kill the history teacher when you had the chance….especially since he got killed anyway when Elena went over the bride and died. It should have been you to take him down.”

“It wouldn’t bring him back though. He will still be dead regardless of what I do. But I don’t understand why I’m not dead myself…” I throw my hands up sniffing tears walking away from her and picking up the drawing of Jacob.

"What are you talking about?" The blonde asks confused.

Turning to face her I held out my left hand with the ring on it. "I performed a link spell and connected my life to your brother. So that I didn't have to bother worrying about me dying and killing my whole Coven. But I should be dead right. Or maybe my mother tricked me into thinking that we were linked but really we weren't at all."

"Hey, we will figure this out together. You and I will leave this town and find another witch to give us the answer." She takes my other hand in hers, spinning the ring on my finger with her thumb. "I hate to say this but he would want you to move on and live your life."

Bex and I headed downstairs to begin packing until she noticed his drawing before suddenly throwing all of them and other things on the floor, angrily when Damon arrived. “You should know better than to sneak up on a lady.”

Damon joked at her. “Good advice. Have you seen one?”

Rebekah turns to face him. “Tragic about Elena. Not to make the gray cloud grayer, but does Matt even have automobile insurance?” She turns her back on him and he rushes over her with a stake. She stops him and catches his arm then twists his wrist so he releases the stake.

Grabbing his wrist that she was holding he winced when I got up in his face. "How the hell are you still alive, jackass!"

"Uh…apparently I wasn't a part of his sire line." He moaned until I heard something shoot through the window where he broke away from us. Suddenly Rebekah is shot through the window and I ducked down quickly dodging a bullet only for a dart to get launched into my back where I collapsed onto the floor with her.

The next time I opened my eyes we were in a moving truck where I saw Caroline and Rebekah tied up across from me. Rebekah looks at her restraint. “Vervain ropes. Looks like Alaric outed us all to the council.” Caroline responded to her.

"They won’t hold us for long, Dissero.” I attempted to do a spell but nothing happened meaning that my connection to siphon Klaus’s strength even when he wasn’t with me was gone.

Rebekah scoffed. “The council... What exactly do they think they can do to me?” Suddenly, the truck is hit by something. The truck rolls over various times and finally stops with them on their backs and my legs are dangling.

I grunted seeing the door get flung open seeing Tyler still alive. "Oh you've got to be kidding me. You still get to be alive!"

Caroline gasped. “Tyler?”

Tyler responded climbing in the truck breaking Caroline’s seatbelt. “I'm harder to kill than you think…..little siphon.” He snapped my restraints catching my limp body when it fell into his arms where I push away from him landing on my knees not wanting to be around someone who helped killed my boyfriend.

Caroline started crying happily. “You're alive? Tyler, you're alive!”

Tyler pulled me up to my feet grabbing a hold of Caroline’s hand too about to leave. “No time. Come on. We got to go.”

Rebekah asked. “ Wait, what about me?”

Tyler glanced over his shoulder gently pushing us outside the door but I could still hear what he said, making me confused as to why he called her that. “Keep 'em busy, little sister.”

Caroline and Tyler are kissing when I bend my knees attempting to catch my breath once we had vamped into the woods. “I never thought I'd see you again! I don't get it. How are you alive?”

“This is going to sound incredible, but…” She kisses him and he drives her against another tree with his speed and they're still kissing. She removes his jacket and his shirt and they kiss again.

“Easy, love. Wrong time, wrong place, wrong equipment….and definitely wrong person.” Tyler shook his head trying to push her away focusing his gaze on me.

“You're miraculously alive. We're fugitives on the run. All signs point to hot hybrid vampire sex.” She removes her jacket and kisses him. Pushing him against a tree and removing her top until she realized something. “Did you just call me "love"?”

Tyler smirked at her. “I don't know, love. Did I?”

Caroline shoved him until he pushed her back coming in my direction when I finally stood upright. “What the hell did you do to Tyler?”

“Stay the hell away from me, Lockwood. I am on the verge of killing the people who murdered the hybrid I cared for. And I am already short one person since he got killed already. If you don’t want to be first I suggest you step back!” I threatened him holding up my right to him breathing heavily fighting the urge to not use the death spell on him.

He kept walking up to me grabbing the sides of my head showing me one of my favorite moments with Klaus when we weren’t together yet. “Trust me, little siphon queen.”

“I can’t believe my mother didn’t tell me that she was still talking with my uncle who wants me dead. I can’t take anymore people lying to me!” I paced in front of the fireplace with Klaus sitting on the couch drinking a glass of blood.

He sat it down rising to his feet snagging my wrist gently holding me in place. “Raelyn, there is something you must know. I will never lie to you, ever you have my word.”

“Thanks…you’ve actually already kept your word. You always keep me in the loop of whatever insane madness that comes your way. And I greatly appreciate it, Klaus.” I drew my hand forward, his wrist holding his hands in mine.

He smiled downward at me. “Call me Nik.”

“Nik why, I thought only Bex did that?”

He nodded yes but raised a hand to my face softly running his thumb over my cheek. “That is true. But you have allowed me to call you Rae. So I am extending the same honor to you.”

“I gladly accept the offer, Nik.” I smiled leaving the room where he watched me walk away genuinely smiling.

Pushing his hands away from my head I began sobbing uncontrollably staring at the teenage hybrid in front of me. “Nik, you’re….you’re alive. That’s….that’s how I am not dead. The ring…our link…it all still remains.”

Caroline started gagging at us throwing her clothes back on. “Oh, my God. You're Klaus! You're disgusting! Raelyn I’m happy for you, but give me my boyfriend back before you two start having hybrid sex please.” She vamped us leaving the two of us alone.

“Rae, let me explain what happened. I’m sorry you had to think I was dead but I couldn’t reveal my plan-” He started explaining until I held up my hand cutting him off.

“Save it. You broke your promise to me. You lied to me. Now I am going back to the mansion when you’re back in your own body then come find me.” Turning on my heels throwing my hair in his face he didn’t move to stop me knowing he needed to get back in his own body before you two spoke again.

Sitting in my bedroom in the mansion I could hear someone shouting downstairs when it finally became nightfall. Shuffling as quickly as I could off the bed I ran down the staircase. My heart was banging in my chest with so much excitement and anger that Klaus was actually alive. Rebekah was the voice that I heard. "How dare you save Caroline and Raelyn over me!"

Klaus teased her when I pushed the set of doors open in front of me. Hello, brother, I thought you were dead. So pleased you're not."

Rebekah's voice croaked. "You left me."

Klaus laid some blood bags down, turning to her. "I only had time to save one of you and you can't be killed. Raelyn and I are now linked together so I couldn’t let her get killed for the sake of her supposed Coven called the Gemini. As for Caroline she is one of her closest friends and she would be heartbroken if she died. Rest assured, I had a worse day than you. I think it's time for us to move on, find some more werewolves."

"I love Rae and don't want her to die. But you could have freed me after you did her. Because in case you didn't realize she's not the only one who gives a crap about you!" She has tears in her eyes. "I mourned you! My heart broke thinking I'd never see you again!"

Running through the mansion I found the pair arguing where I shouted between them. "Niklaus! We need to talk alone now." I couldn't believe that I had to nearly die and he didn't say a word to me.

"Rae, Rae, Raelyn please give me a chance to explain." He followed my heels until we were back in one of the upstairs rooms where I raised my right hand into a fist slamming the door shut.

Spinning on my feet I immediately started crying when my gaze met his blue eyes. "You are a freaking liar. You promised me before we faced Alaric that we would make it out together. That nothing would separate us and I had to watch you get staked through the heart!"

"Raelyn-" He trailed off.

Throwing my hands away from my sides I cut my hybrid boyfriend off, not really in control of my emotions at the moment causing the whole bedroom to lose power then for it all to come back on. "No you don't get to speak until I am finished. When we first met I told you that I hadn't experienced any of my firsts and now they have almost all been with you. My first date, my first kiss, my…my heart belongs to only you. I had to feel you die and be powerless to stop it." Holding up my hand with the linked hybrid blood ring on my left hand. "Now that we are linked as one forever and always I didn't think that I would have to watch the man that I deeply care for….that consumes my very being….that pulled me back from the grief of winning the Merge and killing my brother without knowing….and above all the man that I can say I love whole heartily but apparently you didn’t feel the same otherwise you would have told me your plan to die and come back in the body of one of your hybrids!"

"I do love you, Raelyn Lane!!! I completely and utterly love you no matter if you come from the Gemini Coven that calls you an abomination for being a witch born without her own magic." Klaus vamped forward and gently grabbed me by my shoulders almost to the point of crying himself. "There wasn't enough time to tell you my plans before the Salvatore's betrayed me and made my heart literally stop beating. But don't think for a moment that I didn't feel the same way about you that you do about me."

Sniffing through heavy tears I clutched my hands into fists at my sides. My whole body was struggling to not just collapse into his arms. "Nik, I…I love you. And I never imagined that I would find someone who loved me…even after I was forced to accidentally kill my brother and take on his entire personality alongside my own crazy mind. So you will never know how much it means to me."

"Oh I believe I do, Rae." He moved one of his upward cradles to the side of my cheek in his palm when I leaned into it. "I was raised by a brute of a father as you know. Who called me a bastard and never accepted what I was because I didn't share his blood. And I thought I would forever be alone until you walked into the Grill that night and magically threw me against the wall just for asking your name."

I chuckled, snorting a little at the memory looking back on our first interaction. When I was just a traumatized witch on her own. "Geez I forgot about that. I'm honestly sorry about that." Wiping away some tears that now had turned into happy ones.

"I'm not, Raelyn. It makes me smile at the thought of seeing you as a queen from the very beginning. A queen fit for a king." He smirked, stepping closer where our chests were pressed almost against one another.

Lifting my gaze up for a moment I shuttered feeling nervous by the way that he was looking at me that way. We weren't hiding our desire for each other but he repeatedly kept telling me we didn't have to rush into anything. Yet it was eating away at me not to jump right in. "Before we get any further in this relationship I have to ask. Are you holding yourself back from sleeping with me because I am a virgin?"

"Raelyn, I don't want to push you into something you wished you had waited on. I would wait ten years, a hundred or even another thousand years if you said so, love. Because I love you more than the moon and the stars." He declares holding the other side of my face now giving me the most genuine smile I had ever seen matching the bright glow that was coming from his blue eyes so focused on me.

Running my fingers up his chest I grabbed the fabric of his black shirt leaning up on my toes with my lips hovering over his. "You aren’t pushing me to do anything, Klaus. You never will and I am tired of waiting. I'm tired of running from my insane Coven family. I'm not waiting any longer to get what I want in my life."

“And what do you want, my siphon queen?" He asked in a soft tone. "Say the word Raelyn Lane and I shall give you whatever your heart desires."

Wrapping my arms around his neck I kissed him quickly but softly breaking the kiss and feeling him lean into it immediately. "Make love to me, Klaus Mikaelson."

He smiled at me softly brushing a loose lock of hair behind my ear, “ Your wish is my command.”

Mature content below here - skip if you aren't comfortable

I let out a yelp when he lifted me into his arms, I wrapped my arms around him and pressed my lips against his. He kissed me back passionately and vamp sped into his room. Opening the door, he walked towards the bed and dropped me down to the bed. My back hit the soft silk sheets before I rose up from the bed staring at him softly and brought a hand to his cheek stroking it softly.

He leaned into my touch and brought my fingers to his lips, kissing them softly for a moment before releasing them. Standing tall, he lifted his shirt over his head and threw it to the ground. My heart began to beat for a second as I stared at him, my eyes directed down to his muscular chest, and blushed at the sight.

I averted my eyes with my hands covering them quickly and tried to contain my blush, he looked up at me and smirked at my reaction. “Oh, my siphon queen there's no need to be shy; you can examine my chest as much as you want to.”

“I don’t know what I’m supposed to do remember. I may be stubborn but that doesn’t mean I know everything.” I pointed out to him where I peeked through my fingers for a split second.

“Don't worry I'll go slow with you.“ He reassured me, grabbing my hand with his. “If you want me to stop at any point just tell me and I will, Raelyn.”

“No, I want to do this.“ I said, wishing my heart would stop beating so rapidly like I was scared.

He took a seat beside her on the bed scanning over her face as if looking for a sign that she wanted to back out and was just pretending but he found no such thing on the siphon witch. “I can make you feel alive."

"You already do. What more can I manage, Nik." I challenged, eyeing him.

He cupped my face, and pressed his lips on hers. They were soft, like the petals of a daisy. He wanted permission to enter, and he was glad his little siphon opened her first gateway. The battle of tongues began, not with words but with their lips it did. She tasted like peaches and apples while he wasn't sure what he tastes like.

My hands started to trace his form, I began to run his fingers up and down his muscular chest softly while I began to feel his hand start to crawl underneath my shirt. He yanked my shirt off my head, throwing it to the ground only once breaking the kiss until I was not able to not joke with him at least once. “I’m surprised you didn’t just tear it in half.”

“That may happen later but not now. You ridiculous little witch.” Shaking his hard at me seeing how my eyes were trailing him.

He glanced down at my clothed beasts staring at them deeply before reaching behind my back and began to unclip the straps off and tear it off me in a split second. I gasped at him instantly reaching a hand to cover my breast, he let out a growl at them pushing my hands away. “ Don’t hide from me, my love you are perfect and all mine.”

"Like what you see, my hybrid " I asked, smirking at him, noticing that he was smirking down at me the entire time. My eyes found that he had a tattoo on the front of his chest that looked like a bird and I knew he had a different one on his back shoulder blade from when I saw him as a werewolf.

"Yes, I do very like it indeed " He smirked before gathering me in his arms and pressed his lips down onto mine while placing his hand on my behind squeezing it gently.

I gasped out, breaking the kiss, " You are quite naughty, darling.”

“I’m a thousand years old, Rae. You tend to learn a few things.” He pointed out to me, making me chuckle at his confidence.

I was feeling quite bold and confident and decided to make the next move. I moved my hands towards his lower area which I started to rub him through his jeans, he let out a low groan at the impact and rocked his hips against my hands. “ Rae.” I smirked at his reaction and began to rub him faster not knowing what came over me. “ When did I suddenly become a whore of some sorts.” I had to think to myself.

I ignored my thoughts continuing with my movements, grunts began to escape his mouth. “Bloody hell, Raelyn.”

I felt his member begin to twist in my hand indicating he was close. I kept on with my movements until he pushed my hand away. I stared at him with a questionable look, “Why are you pushing me away?”

He grabbed my face into his hands and stared at me deeply, “ Because if you keep that up I won’t be able to control myself.” The veins began to appear under his eyes when they flashed the golden color making his desire clear for me.

He pushed me down to the bed gently, towering over me. He grabbed onto one of my breasts and began to massage it gently before leaning down, lowering his lips down to one of my nipples and starting to suck on it. I began to whimper in pleasure asis felt his lips on me, he tugged on it with his teeth gently before switching breasts and doing the same thing. After a while, he pulled away and unbuttoned my jeans sliding it off me down to my legs.

He stood up from the bed and unbuttoned his jeans, tugging them down to his legs before stepping out of them wearing nothing but his boxers. He teared his boxers in a split second, releasing his member. My eyes widened at how big It was and wondered how that would fit inside me.

He knelt down in front of my legs and opened my legs up a bit, he ran his hands up my legs and grabbed at my panties before tearing them off in a second. My eyes widened in shock at him and leaned up on my elbows staring down at him in confusion, "What are you doing "

"Do you trust me “ He asked, glancing up at me.

“With all my heart “ I replied struggling to catch my breath knowing that my heart was racing a mile a minute .

He hovered over me and brought his lips down upon mine. I wrapped my arms around his neck and embraced more into the kiss. I felt a hard rock positioned at my lower religion, he placed his member at my center and looked up at me. “ My love, this may hurt for a few minutes, I promise I'll go slowly. Are you sure you want this, I'll stop if you're not ready.”

"No, I want you, “ I said, gripping the bed sheets in my fingers, never moving my gaze from his. “ Please just go gently.”

He nodded and aligned himself against me before thrusting into me softly , I hissed out in pain as I felt him breaking through my wall, tears began to well in my eyes. He let out a groan at how tight his little witch was and how she was squeezing him around her walls, " You feel soo good Raelyn.” He moved slowly against her, I bit down on my lip hard trying to bear through the pain.

Within moments I felt the pain suddenly vanish and began to feel pleasure. I began to move against him and leaned up pressing my lips down upon his. He embraces me back instantly when my fingers dug into his back, drawing blood that would heal later.

He ran his body over every inch of my body he could reach, both of us slick with sweat as he moved against one another, our pants and moans filling the room. He leaned up on his knees and began to thrust his little witch’s at a deeper pace hitting a certain spot inside of her.

"Nik! " I moaned out as his thrust became hard and fast, my boobs began to bounce up and down from the impact and tried to keep up with the rhythm he set but failed and just figured to allow him to be in control..

"Come now, love." He commanded as he pressed his thumb to my clit, circling the swollen flesh until I was crying out incoherently. He watched her in awe , head thrown back, her hair all sweat and wild as a bird nest as he fucked her more harder and faster.

I came moaning out loudly as I felt a wave of pleasure come over me. He came seconds later as I felt him emptying inside of med, both moaning and groaning while they did. He removed from her before laying down beside her trying to catch his breath alongside her. “So did I hurt you too bad. I can give you my blood?”

“I…I’m good just exhausted.” I felt my eyes struggling to stay open until I rolled over onto my side placing my head in the crook of his neck tracing the bird tattoo with my index finger.

Klaus leaned up barely kissing the side of my head running his fingers through my now messy hair watching my chest rise and fall. “Sleep, Raelyn and just now I love you for a thousand years and forever.”

“I’ll love you forever too, Klaus.” I whispered, finally shutting my eyes having the best sleep of my life in the arms of the man and hybrid I loved.

Comments really appreciated ❤️