#stop noooooo

[rosy-crow]

Gee. I can’t imagine who you’re quoting there, buddy.

Oh dear.

Sigh.

[voidthesquished]

THE FATE OF THE JESTER

[crystal-jack-asripines]

WHYYYY does Twitter have to be down on the day Dapper, Richarlyson, and BADBOYHALO HIMSELF are making a 4halo BUFFET

[save-the-villainous-cat]

HERO BEING SEDUCED INTO A VILLAIN

(seduced by the villain ofc) /prompt

“Very good,” the villain praised. “A little deeper.”

There was a crack and the hero gasped, sweating and panting. It felt unreal, it was wrong and it was beyond what they’d expected to be capable of.

“A bit more, sweetheart.” Another crack and then, the hero couldn’t watch anymore. With tears burning in their eyes, they swallowed. Suddenly, they were overwhelmed with emotions. It was too much, too strange. “Perfect.”

The villain’s voice was a purr and their words were like honey. Reassuring, definitely, but sometimes a little too sticky to be good. Their hand around the hero’s was warm and they squeezed gently, thumb drawing little squares into the skin.

“I…” The hero stared at the body.

“You killed them,” the villain whispered. They sounded impressed. “Quite intimately.”

They felt like they had to throw up. The hero looked at the blood and the knife in the supervillain’s chest. The villain’s hand was still around theirs and it still felt weirdly freeing, yet so wrong. But the supervillain had killed with no mercy, right?

“Are you sure they’ve got no pulse?” the hero asked, heart pounding in their chest.

“Pretty much. You stabbed through their lungs and into their heart. Seems deadly to me, love.” The villain kissed the hero’s neck as a reward, catching skin between their teeth to be a little rougher. “You’re being so good.”

“God, this isn’t right. I shouldn’t have killed them,” the hero said but the villain pulled them away gently, hands gliding down to their waist.

“They were a horrible person,” they said as they continued to kiss the hero from behind. “They deserved it.”

“I…” The hero’s head spun.

“Don’t you remember what they did to you?” The villain turned them around easily and went through the hero’s hair with their fingers. “Have you forgotten?”

“No, I just…this feels wrong. They’re—” The hero looked back at the body on the floor, bleeding out. However, the villain caught their jaw and turned their head right back to them.

“Sweetheart.” Their eyes dropped slowly and the hero knew that promised a loving kiss. It felt good to be close to someone after all these months of self-loathing. Somehow, the villain understood and the hero knew they were the only one who ever could.

It was unquestionable loyalty. The hero knew the villain would do anything for them and the hero felt like they had to repay that kindness. Encouragement was like a drug to them.

“You did so well,” the villain whispered and, indeed, they leaned down to press a soft kiss to the hero’s lips. “You’re so perfect.”

Involuntarily, the hero blushed and returned the intimacy, lips against lips, hand in hand, chest against chest. They hesitated at first but the villain’s hands around them steadied them, took their mind off the violent scene. Although they tried their best not to pay too much attention to it, they couldn’t help but notice the blood on the villain’s suit.

Slowly, the villain got bolder though, kissed more passionately, grabbed inappropriate parts of the hero’s body.

“You were doing so well…” they whispered again and the hero couldn’t help but sigh when they had to hold onto the villain so they wouldn’t fall over.

“You think so…?”

“I know so. Killing someone is hard, I understand. But this was a necessity, my love. This had to be done. Your enemies deserve it. They’re horrible people, all of them.”

The villain got a lot lewder as their hands started to find all sorts of ways to get under the hero’s suit.

“I’m so proud of you.”

The hero shuddered, clearly enjoying the praising and with all the touching, they nearly forgot where they were. Nearly.

“Wait…not here…” they gasped and thank god the villain agreed.

It turned them into someone obsessive soon after but the hero truly didn’t miss their humanity once the villain convinced them to kill that too.

[ganondoodle]

as i was awake in the middle of the night for like 2 hours bc i felt sick i had more somewhat random totk thoughts

one being that i really hate how raurus response to concerned zelda is, after sonia died in that almost funny how little impactful it was way, "im sure you are here for a reason" (actually, i hate how often this sentence is used in general to .. idk i guess its supposed to be inspiritational???)

bc what does that mean actually? him saying that to someone who got there absolutely by accident really just sounds like "i dont care go figure it out yourself bc i dont want to think about anything concerning you or your troubles lol" i guess its meant to sound like OOOOH fate has BROUGHT you here bc you have to furfill a role you dont know yet (spoiler its being a sacrifice girl with no personality) and besides me hating the 'inescapable fate' trope in general (at least the way its usually done in these games, which is not to struggle against it but willingly accept whatever you are told and pretend thats good) its really jsut goddamn boring and is really only an excuse to well .. ignore her and her trouble; shouldnt you, if you were actually such a cool guy like the game wants me to believe so bad, do everything in your power to get zelda back to her own world before shes pulled even further into the war you caused now that her only ""mentor"" that could help her get more use of her pretty much useless sudden powers is gone too?? i know shes basically dead wife sonia replacement (can of worms ugh) but it still grinds my gears whenever i think of that cutscene, bc i cant help but hear it as the lamest excuse in existence to not care about her and just kinda .. see what happens which in this case means leave zelda completely on her her own since both rauru and mineru die as well (honestly shouldnt rauru have thought about like .. any plan to defeat gan besides dying himself, given hes the oh so cool and goodest guy king whos only mistake was not stabbing gan the second he stepped into their kathedral castle thing, like even if you had a plan it can still fail but it seemed like he just kinda went in with a handful of people that didnt seem to know each other at all, never got names or faces -or unique voices for that matter- to fight gan face to face inlcuding the girl that came from a different time and had nothing to do with any of this conflict and couldnt even really control her sudden new powers just seems pretty stupid)

thought 2

how totk really feels like botw but for the people who didnt like shiekah tech, its not a sequel, its botw again, but version of only sonau, its like a pokemon game that had two versions but one has weirdly incoherent story and acts like the other never existed jsut as a whole its like retreading the same points but worse, all shiekah tech that was so integral to the world and had such a long history just vanishing and no one caring about any of it like it never happened, HELL the titans were called divine beasts in english but i guess they werent divine or important enough to keep around LOL champions WHO and isntead a never before seen or even heard of race for that matter showing up and planting their ass in every place the shiekah were before, dare i say it feels weirdly manipulative, like either them or some outside force erasing every fact about the ancient shiekah and replace them with sonau stuff bc they are the hot new shit now

this is a point that just doesnt stop bothering me, how the shiekah tech seemed so carefully designed and integrated into botws world and story, its a difficult to keep balance after all, integrating high tech stuff into a medieval setting, but they made it work! and then totk comes around and throws a bunch modern day tech into it puts some vague greenish stone filter on its exterior and call that even better more ancient tech; why did they even bother to make pottery inspired laser shooting spider legged robots so well integrated when they throw a car and rockets into the next game without a thought and call it a day, what was the fucking point

it feels like someone was dead set on having a set of legos thrown into the game it had no place in, if you want players to build whatever they want make a building game instead!! especially if you are just gonna throw it in with seemingly no consideration how out of place it feels togehter with the fACT THAT YOU ALREADY HAD AND ANCIENT HIGH TECH CIVILIZATION WITH A VERY DISTINCT AESTHETIC THAT WAS ALREADY WELL INTEGRATED INTO THE WORLD YOU ARE PLANNING TO REUSE WITH ALOT OF MYSTERY AND UNKOWN STUFF ABOUT THEM TO EXPLORE FURTHER YOU COULD HAVE USED!! but i guess they just "didnt want to play with you anymore" and that so much so that they went out of their way to erase every trace of it, i dont think the words shiekah tech are ever used in the game, and the purah pad and her towers just drive me more isnane bc they are the same shit but called different and also much worse, liek the purah pad isnt some more developed shiekah stone, no its a glorified camera with a teleport function and thats it

(i know i said this before but i really cant stand how obsessed every single NPC is with sonau shit, you get told to your face every second line of dialog that they are so cool and are so mysterious that it just makes me annoyed of them even more, the game is obsessed with shoving them everywhere and telling you over and over you too should obsess over them, they werent weird like that about the shiekah stuff in botw?? the biggesst talking point in botw was calamity ganon ..... which makes sense and in totk its like ... gan is mentioned what, in a newspaper article??? once???and then not even by name i think???)

aside from that big point which will never let me go, its also just .. its not moving forward anything, it actively walks BACK the progress that was made in botw, call me dumb but i dont really count moving one step up in the social roles of each race as a character development (for the side characters like the champions desc- ahem SAGES) but mainly zelda ... god how dirty she was done, totk pretty explicitely makes her regress any development she made in botw aside from she likes link uwu and some people like her too, but also not enough to notice that that weird zelda being all evil and weird isnt her (INLCUDING THE CHAMP- SAGES WHO YOU ARE SUPPOSEDLY FRIENDS WITH??? you dont have to be a genius to pick up on that my god, were you all given the mc dumbo potion or what)

she gets put back to square one, back into the little itty bitty princessy maiden role forced upon her by her royal parentage, this time rauru edition, back into a white little dress, back into the scared puppy eyed teenager, back into a situation she cant handle, back into losing everyone around her (tho honestly botw made me care more about rhoam than totk did about rauru), back into being forced to do a big sacrifice- but worse actually

in botw she went to FIGHT AND HOLD GANON IN THE CASTLE SO LINK HAD TIME TO RECOVER AND IT WOULDNT DESTROY THE LAND!! and you are telling me in totk rauru takes up her botw role and she bascially killed herself to ... restore the mastersword.

......... she ... she did that only to be a glorified version of the stone pedestal in the forest. and then she gets returned to normal itty bitty girly no problem via magic sparkle beam at the end and

DOESNT

EVEN

REMEMBER.

it really is just botw but worse, you even get yet another ghost king of hyrule to guide you around (rhoam did it better fight me ... we dont talk about the questionable choice to make himself darker skinned when posing as just some guy)

i honestly dont think i was ever truly taken aback by anythign that happened in botw, while in totk, the further i played, the more i had to fight with myself to keep the feeling of unease, disappointment and betrayal down

its such a god damn shame, totk should have stayed a DLC, i will forever mournfully dream of a game that explores more of the ancient shiekah, doesnt erase integral parts of the world, developes characters more instead of making them regress back and make them end up even less developed than at the start of the game, dives into buried secrets and mistakes of dark pages of history without giving into a weirldy nationalist(imperalisitc?) narrative and lets characters have some agency for once

if it werent for the yiga i might have actually considered refunding the game, just to be at peace with myself

anyway, aboslutely incoherent word vomit.

[calygocat]

little sketches that i 4got to post here :p

[cult-of-lambs]

[jennrypan]

"Oh wow cute batfam picture"

*tagged as brudick*

😶...I'm gonna start shooting people in the FACE. What the hell. Yall are literal Hell

And tumblrs a big ass bitch for having the gall, the AUDACITY to show me that shit. Die.

[pinkniz]

Im sorry you did WHAT to baby Bendy?!

[ds9soupstore]

solas: i'm going to change the fundamental laws of the world

the world: *is fundamentally changed*

solas:

[neurolady]

You know it occurred to me today after another lazy Sunday Omens session.

When exactly was Aziraphale ever actually given the choice about returning to Heaven.

I mean really pay attention to what The Metatron says

"There are huge plans afoot, enormous projects and I will need you to run them"

At no point was that a request.

Which makes the "offer" after Aziraphale tries to protest so much more sinister.

Up until now, my mind had always taken it as The Metatron sweetening the deal to convince Aziraphale to take the job offer. With a little threat of we know what you've been up to so beware, thrown in for good measure. The penny finally dropped that the Supreme Archangel job was never offered, Aziraphale is being instructed that this is his new position. And the whole we know about your "defacto partnership" that was just an out and out threat. Levelled in the only way Heaven can, they're never going to outright say "you'll be destroyed if you don't", that would not be Heavenly. I mean, look at S1 they made Aziraphale(Crowley) walk into his own destruction. But the offer to reinstate Crowley was definitely a 'don't fuck with me Aziraphale, I hold all the cards here'. I don't know how I've never seen it that way before now?! What the Hell show was I watching all this time?!

I always talk about Crowley's whole world being blown up as soon as Aziraphale interrupts him. I never until today fully appreciated how completely Aziraphale's world is blown up before he even goes back into the bookshop. I mean, he doesn't know Crowley is in full love confession mode yet. He does know, though, that he's walking back in there to either convince Crowley to give everything up and be an angel again (a pretty impossible task), or he's leaving Crowley behind altogether. No wonder he's SO manic. Then Crowley starts in on his confession, complete with cracking voice and the whole shebang. Coupled with The Metatron being right outside the window. It makes so much more sense now why Aziraphale's whole body language is not now don't do this now!

One thing I can't figure out is why The Metatron was prepared to allow Crowley's angelic status to be returned. Why didn't he just tell Aziraphale to wrap it up and end their partnership/relationship there and then. Maybe it's because he fears potential resistance, thanks to their 25 Lazarii miracle. Maybe something to do with Gabrielle and Beelzebub having just run off together. It seems like his only gamble, especially given the sigh of relief in the elevator. What exactly was his plan if Crowley had shocked everyone and accepted? What exactly is his plan now, Crowley has shocked no one and refused? Now that I'm finally seeing how much of a direct threat to both Aziraphale and Crowley that whole conversation actually was, I'm fully convinced he's not going to let Crowley (powerful as he is) alone to wander around on Earth all bitter and broken hearted, potentially getting in the way of The Second Coming. There will definitely be some back channel attacks on Crowley orchestrated behind Aziraphale's back!!

[the-gay-ghost-king]

Just some robots (and a chao) hanging out :3

---

Surprise double propaganda!! Vote Scrap The Hedgehog (the lil guy holding a bomb) in the @sonic-fankid-showdown and vote Yuèliàng (the tall bunny bot) in the @lmk-oc-competition!!

Chaos Project AU, Clutter The Chao, and Scrap The Hedgehog belong to me. Yuèliàng belongs to @sun4ndmo0n

My brother and I both had robo guys and we were both competing in different showdowns/competitions, so we thought it'd be cool if we collaborated on a propaganda piece and had them all meet. I drew Clutter The Chao and Chaos Project Sonic, Sun drew Scrap and Yuèliàng + the background.

Clarification: Sonic and Scrap (and Clutter) are part of the Chaos Project AU, which is pretty much an AU where Sonic's a reformed eggman bot. Scrap is Sonic's kid. Clutter is Scrap's friend and most likely Sonic's chao (haven't completely decided on that bit yet). You can learn more on the AU on the masterpost which I linked somewhere here and you will learn more about Scrap on wednesday when the polls go up!!

Scrap and Clutter aren't canon to the au, however I'll make them canon if you help scrap win <3

[indulgnc]

[self]

i keep getting this insane tickle on the left side of my nose. Like upper part its so intense and i keep thinking im gonna sneeze but i dont!!!!!! ahhh!!!!!

[boimgfrog]

bf today was like "man it's fucked up how I fetishize you...sorry for talking so much about how excited I am for you to get a t dick when you go on hormones, I'm sorry if that made you uncomfortable" and I was like?!??@?!?!??!?@?@? NOOO NO NO NO PLEASE PLEASE TELL ME THAT YOULL FIND MY DICK INSANELY ATTRACTIVE PLEASE LLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASEEEEEEE TALK ABOUT HOW HOT IT IS PLEASEEEEE

[varibean]

Serial killer Hugo au is incredible actually because Varian gets mildly upset and Hugo goes gotchu babe and delivers a corpse to his lab door like a cat

Varian is a brat about it too, he’ll complain about the pettiest stuff around Hugo like

“Ugh this dude cut me off today. License plate GH5TW, blue sedan, turned off on Hiland Street, was wearing a movie theater uniform while driving so probably works night shifts.”

And then when Hugo does his thing Varian acts completely surprised

“Aw 0////0 Hugo you didn’t have to do that it was just a lil thing you’re so sweet.”

[whalesforhands]

THERES AN OFFICIAL IDOL CHILDE??? HOYOFAUR U SRE NOT FAIRRRRRRR NOOOOOO