#stupidest conspiracy theory of all time

[kitty-lemon]

Everytime I read something about Sushant and then I remember how much his death was milked and all that ncb drama which all came from out of control stories. Like people just don't want to accept that bad mental health (depression here) could kill someone or that ppl could commit suicide from something that is not 'pressure'.

[thecutepoison]

This is very speculative, but I'm suspecting Kipperlily is using the Ethereal Plane to spy on the Bad Kids and if I'm right I might have figured how she got found out by the rogue teacher!

First, let me explain my paranoid thoughts about the spying. Since ep 3, we are aware that Kipperlily is hearing their conversations, even if we don't know for sure the extent of it. She, just like Riz, must have a crazy stealth modifier + reliable talent, however I don't think she's relying only on that.

So, there's a scene in ep 4 when the Bad Kids roll for perception to spot Kipperlily. Kristen casts See Invisibility and Fabian rolls a nat 20. Brennan describes, only to Fabian, that although he doesn't see Kipperlily, he feels the "twinge of some kind of sense". Very creepy. That implies that she's there but cannot be seen. She could be invisible, however I don't think that's the case because an invisible person could still be perceived through hearing or touch. Also, Kristen would have been able to see her because of the spell.

With that in mind, the paranoid goblin that lives inside my brain is convinced that she's using the Ethereal Plane to spy on the Bad Kids. The Border Ethereal is perfect for infiltration and spywork, since you pass through physical objects and watch everything in the material plane without ppl there perceiving you. There are a couple of ways to access the Ethereal Plane, with spells or items, but I have no ideia abt the specific method she might be using.

Her being in the ethereal plane explains why Fabian, with his nat 20, didn't notice any physical indicatives of Kipperlily but still felt a presence, like some sixth sense. Now, Adaine did use her Third Eye so she could see into the Ethereal Plane within 60 feet and still saw nothing. But that doesn't mean that Kipperlily isn't there since there's a very easy way to circumvent Adaine: Non detection. This is a third level spell that hides the target from divination magic - for 8 hours they "can’t be targeted by any divination magic or perceived through magical scrying sensors". The Rat Grinders, long time haters of the Bad Kids, are for sure aware that Adaine is a divination wizard, they would be fools to spy on the party without casting Non Detection first. She's the motherfucking elven oracle!

Okay, now about the rogue teacher. In ep 3, Siobhan theorizes the rogue professor is the ghost teacher. I think she's absolutely right! We know most teachers of Aguefort and even if the ghost one was among those we havent seen, the Bad Kids would probably have heard about them if they were teaching something like ranger class. It's plausible that the reason for the party having no ideia who they are and not even passing by them in the halls is that the ghost is the rogue professor. After all, no one knows who the hell they are, it's the whole point of their teaching method. And for a ghost it would be really easy to go undetected since they can travel through the Ethereal Plane, beside the insane stealth.

Indulge my conspiracy theories for a minute. Rogue professor = Ghost Teacher and Kipperlily can wander in the Ethereal Plane, the plane of ghosts. Even with the advantage of being on the same plane as the teacher, it would still be a nightmare to find them since they are a pro rogue. In fact, Kipperlily didn't achive that: the rogue teacher found her.

But how did she manage to have the professor find her? I'm sure it wasn't an accident, she's too calculating for that. So, I started thinking about what would I do in her place and came up with the stupidest ideia. It's utterly ridiculous. But it could totally work and the strategy seems kinda Kipperlily's style.

Remember the Ghost Steak? The one Fig tried to eat when she invaded the teacher's lounge in season one? It's the ghost teacher's lunch, and Brennan reestablished its existence in ep 3 when Adaine used Ethereal Sight, explaining that the school wards are porous enough to allow ethereal travel and other stuff.

So if I was Kipperlily, my dumbass plan would go as follows: invade the teacher's lounge through the ethereal plane and hide inside the fridge. It wouldn't be a problem for me since I'm intangible and can pass through stuff, plus the other professors wouldn't see me even if they opened the fridge. Inside, I wait as long as needed, until the Rogue/Ghost Teacher gets hungry. They finally open the fridge to grab their snack, only to find me looking at them from inside the fridge like a lunatic. Mission complete: got found by the rogue teacher and aced junior year!

It's so mundane and stupid and that makes me more convinced that's exactly what happened. It's too funny to not be true.

[ckret2]

Chapter 27 of human Bill Cipher trying to trick his captors into liking him, featuring a mall shopping trip that turns into this:

Also, Bill faces the most difficult ethical dilemma of his life: should he act like a big jerk to a 13-year-old.

####

As they left the cheap jewelry kiosk, Bill tapped his new dress shoe against Stan's ankle to catch his attention. "Hey. Your cut." He flipped a ring in the air.

Stan caught it and inspected the symbol on its surface. "Is that the Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel?"

"You gave your protégé your fez, I thought you might want a replacement! I know how proud you are of your lodge membership, Fisherman."

Stan admiringly studied the ring and its open-mouthed crescent fish; then the corners of his mouth turned down. "Ahhh, it wasn't my membership." He stuffed the ring in his pocket.

"No? I got one with the Fishmasons symbol if you'd like that better." Bill spun the oversized ring on one finger. It slipped off and he fumbled trying to catch it.

In the smoothest move he'd pulled all summer, Dipper caught the ring before it hit the floor. He ignored Bill's outstretched hand and inspected the complicated tool-lined diamond symbol. "Fishmasons? I thought they were called..."

"Yeah, you would," Bill scoffed. "Do you believe everything you read in The Paranoia Code? You know novels are usually fictional, right?"

"But don't masons work with stone? How does a 'fish mason' make sense?"

"If everyone knew what it meant, it wouldn't be a secret society, would it?"

Dipper gave up on prying anything more than snark out of Bill and turned toward Stan. "The Royal Order of the Holy Mackerel is associated with the Fishmasons, right?"

"Yeah," Stan said, "they're uh, sister organizations or something, I think. It's complicated."

"It's a spin-off organization," Bill said. "All Mackerels are Fishers. Once you've reached the top rank in the Fishers, you're eligible to join the Holy Mackerel."

"Yeah. What he said."

Dipper nodded. "Sooo... is it true that the Fishmasons are secretly... working with the government, or...? I mean, yeah, I read it in a book. But they've had a lot of real historical figures."

Stan snorted dismissively. "If they are, they didn't invite me to those meetings."

"Well sure. The lodge that decides politics is in D.C.," Bill lied. Dipper's head whipped around to stare at him. Ha. When they got home, Bill would have to spend some time deciding which would be the stupidest conspiracy theory rabbit holes to send Dipper down. If he played his cards right, by Thanksgiving he could have the kid spouting rubbish that would alienate half his extended family.

"Would you stop staring at me like that?" He shoved the side of Dipper's face; and, while he was distracted, grabbed back the Fisher ring to inspect its symbol. Kryptos's face. Far better drawn than Bill could do. And the thin little layer of gold atop the ring should be enough to enhance Bill's psychic signal. Maybe that would be enough to get a call through to the Nightmare Realm.

He tucked the ring in his shoe and turned to Stan. "Anyway, if you think that was good, you should see what I can do in a real jewelry store. What do you say?"

"I dunno. Jewelry shops are tricky, they're always on the lookout for shoplifters."

"They never catch teams and we've got two rambunctious kids to split their attention. I'll do the distracting, you do the lifting. When's the last time you had a gold watch that isn't cursed?"

"Nope!" Mabel, who'd been trailing behind the group with her arms crossed, finally shoved her way between Stan and Bill. "That's enough! We came here for a good time, not a crime time!"

"We came here to go shopping," Stan protested. "We're shopping!"

"Yeah, we're just getting the best discount possible."

"It's like advanced couponing."

Bill laughed. "Hey, I like that."

"No!" Mabel stood in front of them, arms and feet spread wide like a barrier. "Grunkle Stan, you should know better. You're letting—" she dropped her voice to an emphatic whisper, "Bill talk you into doing bad stuff. The whole reason you came along was to make sure he can't do that!"

Stan snapped, "Oh, like you didn't just make us stand around for an hour while you played dress up with him! Why's it okay when you play with the demon, but nobody else can make him useful?"

Mabel winced. "No, that's not... I mean..."

If this conversation went the wrong way, Stan and Mabel might both talk each other out of doing anything interesting with Bill. He'd better defuse this situation quick. "Hey, c'mon, Stanley, that's your niece. Don't be so hard on her."

There was a flicker of irritation on Stan's face directed at Bill, followed by a flicker of guilt toward Mabel, followed by him grunting and refusing to make eye contact with anyone.

That was one threat neutralized. Bill turned his grin on Mabel. "Sorry for monopolizing the trip, kid. We'll make it up to you! Fordsy got you that cute crystal bracelet, didn't he—wanna graduate to some real gemstones?"

"Hey, yeah," Stan said, immediately perking up. "You like jewelry! I can get you something with hearts or kittens. Way better than a bunch of boring rocks." Bill mentally patted himself on the back. Oh, he was so good at this. Good old sibling rivalry. Families were so easy to manipulate.

Mabel slapped her hand over the rainbow crystal bracelet mixed amidst her other bracelets. "I don't want you to get me real jewelry!" she shouted; but Stan had already set out on his new mission, with Bill trotting along just behind him. "Not if you have to steal it!"

"Relax!" Bill waved without turning around. "We're a couple of pros, you've got nothing to worry about." He elbowed Stan before he could absorb Mabel's protests. "Don't worry, once she's older she'll appreciate what a financial investment fine jewelry is. Never too early to buy a little gold. Or—well—acquire gold."

"Yeah," Stan said, "who knows when the next apocalypse is gonna be."

"Could be any day now," Bill lied.

"The only bracelet I want is this one!" Mabel waved her arm in the air, pointing at the shooting star friendship bracelet Bill had made. But Stan and Bill were too far away to care about her protests now.

Mabel's shoulders slumped. She glowered at the friendship bracelet. It didn't seem as friendly as it did when Bill gave it to her. "This whole trip was a mistake, wasn't it."

Dipper grimaced. "I didn't say it."

"You don't have to." Mabel sighed heavily. "I don't know what got into me. B—Goldie's been so nice lately, I thought he was making progress! But he's been nothing but a creep today. Guess the niceness was all an act."

"He can act nice for a long time. It took Grunkle Ford almost three years to figure out how evil he is." When Dipper concluded that this hadn't had the comforting effect he'd intended, he asked, "Do you wanna tip off security about the jewelry heist?"

Mabel sighed again. "No, I don't want Grunkle Stan to get in trouble. And if Goldie's arrested he might spill the beans to mall security. Let's just wait outside by the car."

"Yeah, all right," Dipper said. "If they don't come out in twenty minutes, we'll call Ford."

Headed the other way across the mall, Bill said, "So, a watch for you, a necklace or something for the kid, and for me... they probably don't have crowns here, so—"

"Whoa, hey, I don't remember offering to get you anything," Stan said. "I already got you fancy shoes and a bunch of clothes. We're square."

"We're no such thing. Besides, why should I help you if I'm not getting anything?" Bill asked. "Maybe earrings? Gimme a nail when we get home and I can pierce my own ears—"

His arm was wrenched backwards and he fell on his back.

Thirty feet away, Mabel yelped as she was yanked back and landed on her butt.

Bill and Mabel turned around and stared at each other.

Bill said, "Right! Forgot about that. Just—get over here."

"No!" Mabel shouted. "You get over here!"

Bill scowled. "Come on, kid. Your great-uncle and I are trying to do something here. If you don't want to come along, at least let Stanley have the other half of the bracelet—"

"I said NO!" Mabel planted her feet wide apart and tugged her wrist back as far as it could go. "You used me! You were only nice so you could go outside and I fell for it! As soon as you got what you wanted, you started acting like a huge poop face again!"

"Wow, language—"

"I'm not helping you anymore!"

Bill could feel his face heating up. "Kid, don't be ridiculous! You can't stand there forever! You're being..." selfish, irrational, petty—what word would get him what he wanted?

The pedestrian chatter over the inoffensive mall music had fallen silent. The feeling of being watched crawled over his back. (He seemed to discover another unpleasant new human bodily sensation every day.) Oh. Witnesses. There was no way the stranger in a shouting match with a little girl was coming out of this looking cool.

He could still save face if he got her uncle to do Bill's arguing for him. He turned hopefully to his new shoplifting buddy. "C'mon, she's—she's being unreasonable, right? We're talking about one watch, here."

And Bill had lost him. Stan's expression hardened. He crossed his arms and Bill flinched at the movement. "If a stupid watch is gonna upset Mabel that much..."

Families were so difficult to manipulate! Why did they have to gang up on him, it wasn't fair. He shot a furious glower at Mabel.

And then laughed, loudly enough for the rubberneckers to hear. "Okay, okay! You win. Sheesh, you look so serious. Peace talks in front of the Kidz Zone?"

Sternly, Mabel said, "Okay, but you do not get to ride the little coin-operated train."

"I wasn't gonna ask!" Bill paused. "Or the—?"

"Or the helicopter!"

Dipper called, "You haven't earned it, man."

"Fine," Bill snapped, "I didn't want to ride it." Swallow your disappointment, Cipher. Just play it cool.

When they'd rendezvoused, Bill said, "Okay, I might have gone a little overboard. Big deal. But we've been here all afternoon, we haven't eaten, I'm sure that's why everyone's so testy. Let's just swing by the food court and then get out of here."

Mabel frowned. "You're just trying to get us to stay."

"Yes. I am. So that we can eat before we go." If he ended this on a win, even a small win, that would be what everyone took away and he could call this trip progress. "Funny thing about human bodies is they need to be fed a couple times a day. Maybe you've noticed."

Dipper frowned. "Dude, you're only eating twice a day?"

"I don't question your diet, get off my back. What do you think, Stanley, feed the kids before we go?" Bill might've lost Mabel, but he had a shot at securing Stan. He could work on Mabel again once they were home. "You wanna drive home a couple of cranky teens, or a couple of cranky and hungry teens?"

Dipper snapped, "We're only cranky because of—!"

"Nah, he's right," Stan said wearily. "I'm starving. We'll grab something quick to eat."

Bill immediately perked up; but Mabel's frown deepened.

####

"I want chicken strips," Dipper said. 

Mabel said, "I'm getting pizza."

Bill said, "I want—"

"I don't care what you want," Stan said. "I'm getting a burger and you're getting the fries."

"Oh, so you want to find out what I'm like when I'm the cranky and hungry one?"

Stan grunted. "Fine. Your budget's five dollars. I really do only have a twenty."

"Fine." Bill drifted over to Mabel, who'd gotten in line in front of the food court's pizza booth. "Hey, Shooting Star—"

"Leave me alone, jerk."

"Whoa, am I not allowed to get a slice of pizza?"

Mabel didn't respond. She was glaring through the glass display window at the available pizza flavors as she waited for her turn to order. Apparently Bill interpreted that as permission to stay and look over the flavors himself. 

Standing so close to Bill Cipher when Mabel didn't want him there was like having a monster breathing down her neck. She hadn't realized how hover-y he could get until it stopped being fun. She remembered something like this from Ford's lesson on cults and con artists, how they try to get into your head by talking and talking and not giving you any time and space to breathe.

She could feel Bill's heavy gaze on the side of her face. Dipper and Stan were at the next restaurant over, but Bill stood between her and them. The chain bracelet on her wrist felt like a handcuff. She wanted to rip it off and be free of him. She wanted to go home.

"I've never had American pizza before," Bill said. "What do you think, cheese or Hawaiian?"

Mabel screwed up her face. "Ew, the one with pineapple?"

Bill's grin twitched wider. "Is that a vote for cheese, then?"

Gross, he was trying to get her to talk again. She glared at the pizza more determinedly. "Get what you want, I don't care."

Bill sighed. "Fine. You're no fun." He looked over the pizzas—standing too close—for one brief moment of heavy silence; and then, pointing between the cheese and Hawaiian, murmured to himself, "Eenie, meenie, miney..."

Mabel's whole body went stiff.

####

She felt the oppressive oven-like heat of Bill's dark floating pyramid, a too-euclidean temple built without the comfort of humans in mind, so hot that touching the walls burned your skin; and she felt a sticky sweat running down her back. She felt the constant electrical static of Bill's glowing shadowy grip around her waist. Every time she shifted and struggled, her sweater crackled and stung her. Bill's hand felt like nothing, absolutely nothing, and it was crushing and inescapable.

She could hear his voice, that forced jollity pushing to the verge of exhausted hysteria, saying, "I think I'm gonna kill one of them now just for the heck of it!"

She could see his eye like a blood red spotlight, eye like an incinerating laser, the light swallowing her and Dipper; she heard her heartbeat pounding in her ears; she saw the symbol that represented her flashing in Bill's eye, and even before he stopped she knew it would be her. 

"EENIE... MEENIE... MINEY..."

She saw his hand tremble with rage as he prepared to snap her out of existence.

"YOU!"

####

"Hey, you." Bill put a hand on Mabel's shoulder. "What are you getting? Maybe we can split two slic—"

There was a wild look in Mabel's eyes.

The moment she seized his upper arm, he knew he was ending up on the floor and it was going to hurt.

She spun her back to him, jerked him against her, and flipped him over her shoulders. It was bizarrely relaxing, that second spent floating upside-down in the air. Familiar, comforting.

And then he slammed back first on the tile floor. And it hurt.

He stared wheezing at the faraway lights until his internal organs remembered how to lung. The world was too bright; he'd lost his sunglasses. He sat up and gingerly felt the back of his head. It had cracked open, he was leaking internal organs—no. That was his hair. His head was fine.

Dizzily, he asked, "What was that for?" He shook his head to clear it. "Hey. Hey! What the heck was that for!" He grabbed the counter and got to his feet, and almost slipped back down on his first attempt. "I've been a little obnoxious but what'd I do to deserve a surprise attack out of nowhere? What, were you just waiting for a chance to get the jump on me—"

And then he saw the look on Mabel's face—the absolute unadulterated terror—in the split second before she gave a little flinch of realization and the guilt kicked in.

Baffled, he looked past her and the confused nearby mall-goers to Stan and Dipper—who thankfully didn't look angry, but they also didn't look as confused as Bill felt. They had tight-lipped white-faced looks like they understood what they'd just seen perfectly.

"What," Bill said. "What'd I do? Was it something I said?" He racked his brain. He did something that scared the dickens out of them—because all of them were giving him that look—it was three against one, something must have happened that he didn't pick up on. Something that made humans nervous that wasn't important enough for someone like him to recall?

He didn't know what.

That was it. He lost. All his work was undone, they were afraid of him again, they saw him as a threat and they'd lock him back up in the shack. There went any chance of ever seeing the outside world before his execution. There went his hopes of befriending the more pliable humans, or winning Ford back over. There went his conversations with Mabel. And he didn't even know what he did wrong.

If he killed Mabel and cut the bracelet cord, was he fast enough to escape before Stan and Dipper could react? If he lunged over the counter, could he get the pizza cutter and slit Mabel's throat before she flipped him again?

He saw a flickering glimpse of his uncoordinated scramble in the futures where he tried; the scene quickly fizzled out as he concluded it wouldn't work.

"Sorry," Mabel said. "Instinct. You know how martial arts are! You get it trained into your muscle memory, and... and... I... didn't mean to do that, that was my bad."

No less confused, Bill said, "Yeah, no, sure, it's—it's fine." He couldn't afford for it not to be "fine"; he didn't know what the other options were. "I know I cut an intimidating figure." He laughed weakly.

He couldn't apologize even if he wanted to. He didn't know what he was supposed to be apologizing for. He was still watching Mabel's face and Dipper's and Stan's for any context clues to explain what just happened.

And Mabel said, voice small and shaking, "You... don't wanna hurt us again, right?"

Bill blinked slowly at her.

It was the stupidest question he'd ever heard.

She had to know that. Everyone watching had to know that. Bill had been plotting how to hurt them again not fifteen seconds ago. He had every reason to want to hurt them—his very survival depended on finding a way to hurt them—and anyway, regardless of his intentions, obviously if he was asked he'd say "no," wouldn't he! As if he could admit to his captors that he did want to hurt them! It was such a breathtakingly stupid question that he could laugh.

He didn't laugh. He didn't point out how dumb she was for asking, or what a waste of time the question was, or remind her that they both knew there was only one answer. He didn't want to show off how effortlessly he could talk circles around humans; he didn't care about making her feel stupid.

He only wanted Mabel to stop looking at him like he terrified her.

So he said, "No. Of course I don't want to hurt you." He nodded toward Stan and Dipper, "No promises about these guys, they've been making fun of our fashion sense all afternoon, but... not you." He held up one hand, showing Mabel the friendship bracelet she'd given him with the evil eye beads. "You gave me a new job, remember?"

He'd hoped the jokey half-threat might help lighten the mood, maybe get her to smile; but she just nodded. "Okay."

Okay.

Stan shuffled his feet awkwardly. "Welp. I lost my appetite. We're going home."

####

Bill didn't care about Stan and Dipper glaring at his back as they trudged toward the exit, but Mabel walking so quietly beside him was sandpapering at his nerves. If he were back home and she were one of his usual pack of friends, he could just order her to perk up or else get out of his sight until she did—but that wouldn't work here, where he was currently not all powerful, he didn't have supreme control over everybody in the vicinity, and they did have to share a ride home. If he tried to get all imperious on her, she'd never speak to him again and Stan would probably break his skull.

What could he do to make her less nervous?

"Hey." He held out his hand to her. She gave it a quizzical look, then looked up at Bill. He said, "Can't hurt you if I can't use my hand, right? Unless you expect me to start biting."

Mabel said, "This isn't, like... a deal, is it—?"

"No! What? There's no deal, where would there be a deal?" Irritably, Bill said, "I'm just trying to help, if you don't think it's helpful then fine, whatever—"

Mabel took his hand. He shut up.

She flinched in surprise and pulled her hand back, holding the ring with the Fishmasons symbol. "I don't w..."

"I know you don't. Listen—we're all going to jail if we go back to 18th Century to return anything, but... I mean, we pass the ring kiosk on the way out, so..." Was that enough? Would that do anything?

She pushed it back into his hand. "You return it."

Irritation flared up his throat; he swallowed it down. "No problem." She was probably worried he was trying to set her up.

As they walked past the kiosk, he steered around to the side opposite the teen manning it; ran one hand over the rows of rings like he was idly inspecting the designs as he passed; and with a subtle movement, slid the stolen ring back amongst the others without pausing. He showed Mabel his empty hand to prove he'd done the deed.

As they moved passed the kiosk, she took his hand again. He squeezed hers back.

He'd find another way to get a message out to Kryptos. That dumb cheap ring probably wouldn't have worked anyway.

Dipper muttered, "You're still a threat if you have one hand free." He took Bill's other hand. They simultaneously shuddered. Never mind the being-watched feeling Bill had earlier, this was what the phrase "skin crawling" truly meant.

But Mabel immediately perked up. "Thanks, Dipper."

Oh! Sure! Thank him. Bill shot Dipper a dirty look and tightened his grip. (It wasn't even tight enough to hurt.) "I forgot how sweaty your palms are."

"Shut up."

Behind them, Stan grumbled, "I'm just glad you only have two hands."

"Hey!" Bill twisted around to give Stan an exasperated look. "Do you have any idea how much I envy you right now? This is torture. I can feel every fingerprint on these two. How come you're the only one who doesn't have to suffer."

Mabel laughed weakly. "Because Grunkle Stan never tried to end the world."

"Neither did I." He sighed exaggeratedly. "But fine—I'll take my punishment like an adult."

He'd gotten a laugh out of Mabel. That was good enough for now.

####

As soon as the car pulled around to the house side of the shack, before they'd even come to a stop, Bill unfastened his seat belt, shouldered open the door, and tumbled out into the sunlight and dirt. A couple of stolen shirts fluttered free.

"Hey!" Stan rolled down his window. "Get back—! How'd you get that door open?!"

"I never closed it!" Bill was already doing cartwheels across the grass, turned like a sunflower to catch the early evening sunbeams filtering through the trees. "I just pulled it close to the car."

"It was ajar the whole drive?!"

"A jar of what?" Bill's cartwheels were already better than the ones he'd tried earlier that day.

Mabel winced. "Sorry, Grunkle Stan, I should have checked..."

"It's not her fault!" Like heck was Bill letting Mabel get in trouble over one little door. "I'm an out-of-control agent of chaos! I'd ride home sitting on the roof if this body had the friction to stay put."

Stan snapped, "Next time, that's where I'm putting you!"

While Stan parked properly and everyone else got out, Bill got tired of cavorting and trudged up to the shack. He kicked his shiny new shoe against the wall as he waited for the Pines to let him inside.

"Glad that's over," Stan sighed. "I'm never going shopping with you again."

Yeah, sure he wasn't. Bill could work on him. Stan would want a new watch eventually.

"And I'm still starving," Stan said.

"Pizza," Bill said. Dipper and Mabel perked up like a couple of dogs that had just heard their owner say walk.

"Ehh..."

"Hawaiian," Bill added.

Stan looked considering. "I do appreciate pineapple's laid-back, tropical attitude." Dipper and Mabel groaned in disappointment.

Bill proposed, "Two pizzas."

The Pines and Bill went inside, and the door swung shut behind them.

None of the humans noticed the minuscule break Bill had kicked in the shack's unicorn hair barrier.

####

(Thanks for reading, y'all! I've been really looking forward to posting this chapter, so if you've got any comments or thoughts, I'd love to hear them!)

[dearweirdme]

“There’s no way Jk and Jm would leave publicly for a romantic holiday while also giving out their destination.. that’s just idiotic for any celebrity to do.”

Yet taekook can openly attend movie premiers together with cameras and thousands of people watching? Yet Tae can openly talk about Jk singing him “love” songs all the time? Yet tae can namedrop Jungkook as much as he pleases and announces to everyone he is going to have a meal at Jk’s? Yes Jk and Jimin wouldn’t go for a romantic holiday while announcing it to everyone but they can shoot 2 birds with one stone. Anything taekook do is some sort if confirmation for y’all but your logical thinking skills only come into play when it is Jikook? Lol.

There’s clearly so much y’all are forcing yourselves not to realize. For example, Jimin and Jk could have shot their travel show at any other time, so why do u think it just happened to be when Jk made his solo debut with Seven and when he was in NY? Jk has visited NY many other times, why did it only have to be then? Did u consider that maybe Jimin could have used that opportunity to be there for Jk in the guise of just filming? You tkkrs think you are smart but y’all are the stupidest shippers i ever saw. Little to no common sense. A very large part of this fandom thinks that Jikook is just fanservice and this narrative has gone on for years. People write stuff like this on all social media platforms every single day and u honestly think they company or even Jimin and Jk don’t know about these narratives? People literally email bighit about this everyday and u think they don’t know? So why do u think they would be stupid enough to keep playing this game knowing that most fans already figured out that they are just “FS”? You don’t think the company is rich enough and smart enough to find other not so obvious ways to fool fans? Why is it so hard for y’all to accept that Jimin and Jungkook are doing something they both love and want to do? Why is it hard to admit that they might just want to spend time together while documenting it for their fans? When tae did his friendcation thingy with wooga, where were all these conspiracy theories? Didn’t y’all find it sweet? Now because it is Jimin and Jk, it is the company preparing content to feed Jokers? Really😂.

Jimin and Jk are not fools and they have told us more than once that they know what fans say. See tkkrs popping veins because 2 bandmates who have known each other for over a decade are going on a trip together. Y’all can console urselves all u want by saying it is just company content or work but you and I know damn well that show is only happening because Jimin and Jk want it to happen. Jk could have decided to use this time to hang out with his “boyfriend” but he chooses to spend the time traveling and filming documentaries with his bandmate. You know as well as i do that Jk would have said NO if he didn’t want to do this show and travel with Jimin. We know that it was never the company’s idea but Jimin’s suggestion years ago which Jk agreed to so it is only happening because if Jikook and no one else:

Ofcourse Jimin and Jk obviously can’t travel for a private trip now announcing it to everyone but don’t forget that even though they would be filming, they wouldn’t be filming 24/7 so they still have time in between the shoots to do “private stuff”. You see? Killing 2 birds with one stone.

Also, please give it a rest with all this Taennie is PR nonsense! Deep down u know that ur theories make no damn sense because Tae has absolutely no reason to play along with whatever that walk was. Why would he agree to play along with a media play move that doesn’t benefit him? Why only him? There’s so many other pple Jennie could have done that with so why Tae? It’s funny how much ur brain plays with you when u really don’t want to believe something. On one hand y’all claim Tae doesn’t like fooling his fans and is very transparent but on the other hand u have no problem claiming he had no problem participating in media play to fool millions. Pick a damn narrative and stick to it fcol!

Sigh... hello again anon!

THis is my last reply to you. SO please don't come back because I will block you next time. We are not gona agree, deal with it, or change your mind 😁.

Yet taekook can openly attend movie premiers together with cameras and thousands of people watching? Yet Tae can openly talk about Jk singing him “love” songs all the time? Yet tae can namedrop Jungkook as much as he pleases and announces to everyone he is going to have a meal at Jk’s? Yes Jk and Jimin wouldn’t go for a romantic holiday while announcing it to everyone but they can shoot 2 birds with one stone. Anything taekook do is some sort if confirmation for y’all but your logical thinking skills only come into play when it is Jikook? Lol.

Obviously yes, and Jimin and Jk could also hang out publicly just like Tae and Jk, just like Jimin and Yoongi, just like any pair of members. Yet they have not evidently done so. Do I think they haven't met at all, no.. I think they have, because they'r friends. I do not think it has been as much though, especcially during the time Jm was preparing and promoting Face. The things we have seen from Tae and Jk are different, though you do not see it. Tae and Jk have been consistent in meeting up dispite busy schedules. None of those things separately would be confirmation of anything, but them combined and the consistency does show a different relationship between them and the other members. I know you feel you are being logical, but logic is not looking for maybe's and filling in parts of a story you have no knowledge about. If you were to let go of your believe in Jkk.. you would see there was less evident interaction between Jk and Jm than between Tae and Jk. If I were to let go of my believe in Jk and Tae, I would still be left with many instances of them meeting up and talking about each other. Point is, we just have less to fill in than you do.

There’s clearly so much y’all are forcing yourselves not to realize. For example, Jimin and Jk could have shot their travel show at any other time, so why do u think it just happened to be when Jk made his solo debut with Seven and when he was in NY?

Ah!! So you do think it's possible for them to do stuff private?!

Jk has visited NY many other times, why did it only have to be then?

Scheduling.

Did u consider that maybe Jimin could have used that opportunity to be there for Jk in the guise of just filming?

Sure, but coincidentally it wasn't.

A very large part of this fandom thinks that Jikook is just fanservice and this narrative has gone on for years.

Not me! I'm fully convinced they are actual close friends.

So why do u think they would be stupid enough to keep playing this game knowing that most fans already figured out that they are just “FS”?People literally email bighit about this everyday and u think they don’t know?

Ofcourse they know. Just like they know about Taekook narratives, Yoonmin narratives, Taejin... Vmin... etc... Shippers aren't bad for business anon. They play into it at times. Bh doesn't actually want all the ships to disappear. Look how much attention Jimin and Jk are gathering right now. You only focus on the negative comments, but I can assure you there's a much larger part of fandom who's super happy and excited to see them still plan content for Army right now.

You don’t think the company is rich enough and smart enough to find other not so obvious ways to fool fans?

Oh, but cheap ways are always so much better looking to companies.

Why is it so hard for y’all to accept that Jimin and Jungkook are doing something they both love and want to do? Why is it hard to admit that they might just want to spend time together while documenting it for their fans?

Not hard at all. I agree. Doesn't make it romantic though.

When tae did his friendcation thingy with wooga, where were all these conspiracy theories? Didn’t y’all find it sweet? Now because it is Jimin and Jk, it is the company preparing content to feed Jokers?

Super sweet, absolutely.. also work. It's like working with your favorite people.. who wouldn't enjoy that. Tae at Jinny's Kitchen... also work! Still sweet. Jk with Jimin... probably super sweet, super funny... but still work. It should not be a surprise to you that it's work anon. They're literally in the same band. For years all they've done is work. I Tae and Jk did a cooking show or whatever together, I wuold be super endeared.. but if there's camera's and it's intended for army to see it's still work.

See tkkrs popping veins because 2 bandmates who have known each other for over a decade are going on a trip together.

Could it maybe be because Jkkrs spoil it?

Y’all can console urselves all u want by saying it is just company content or work but you and I know damn well that show is only happening because Jimin and Jk want it to happen.

No you're probably right. Still doesn't make it romantic.

Jk could have decided to use this time to hang out with his “boyfriend” but he chooses to spend the time traveling and filming documentaries with his bandmate.

I doubt they'll be gone for weeks anon.. chill. We all know how important Army is for members. That's who they are doing this for.

Ofcourse Jimin and Jk obviously can’t travel for a private trip now announcing it to everyone but don’t forget that even though they would be filming, they wouldn’t be filming 24/7 so they still have time in between the shoots to do “private stuff”. You see? Killing 2 birds with one stone.

Ah, the illusive "private stuff" you all love so much. See this.. is the point where you go from realistic.. to imaginary. This is the point you know nothing about, and yet you are sure Jk and Jm are doing 'private stuff'. Filling in the void with romance.. as usual.

Also, please give it a rest with all this Taennie is PR nonsense!

Oh anon, Taennie is a pr strategy to a t. Which is actually way more common than you seem to be aware of.

Now, please don't come back.

[letrune]

Xenophobia really rots the brain

How many highly praised people chosen to be homophobic or transphobic or islamophobic, and suddenly lose their marbles? It seems like they are willing to give up advances sciences to tie themselves to basic, even ultrasimplistic falsehoods...

It is because the more clever someone is, the easier they can excuse contradictions and talk them away. There is a BIG market in being a xenophobe, with multiple governing bodies, conspiracy theorist techbros and rich jerks each already being xenophobes, and fame awaits those who are crying about to return to the past in the name of any sort of rephrase of the 14 words. This fame is either fleeting and requires constant reinforcement, or gives an almost cult-like following of someone repeating the same lies as before.

A certain rich person is currently the face of a whole cult of xenophobes, whom go so far as to wear her face as masks, praise a cardboard cutout like a real figure and perform pilgrimages to her Holy Tweet, where they ritualisticly re-like it.

Another rich person is being treated like he invented free speech, cars and computers, despite evidence to the contrary. His cult is so into him they praise him for even the stupidest business decision that harms everyone.

A scientist of evolution recently became enamoured by another strain of xenophobia in a field he is not trained in, but his personal cult suddenly kicked out anyone pointing this out and treat him like he is a divine interlocutor of all sciences, which is extremely weird given this scientist's atheist beliefs.

A common trait in the people following them all is that they completely lost all but their xenophobia in social life. Their social media feed is all about them posting their xenophobia, not a single image of their pets can be posted without followed by a rant of their conspiracy theory that the Other People want to kill their pets. A discarded candy wrapper is claimed to be a covert assassination attempt, a television show failing or succeeding is claimed to be because of Evil Elites, while a country openly executing their target is praised, as if the world's fifth largest military power would somehow fight some clandestine superpower entirely made out of the Other People.

Xenophobia is so rampant that the xenophobes check each other for any sign of being from The Other People group, all things down to bones and movements are being checked, their skin colour analysed, they follow each other home, spend time trying to find a random person's family.

When they go on a specific forum, they scare each other with their big lies, praise people who are openly xenophobic by making them their own neonazi regalia, posters from the failed fascist countries modified as "memes", and they are openly drinking up the words of crazed cuckoo conspiracy theorists using a single letter of the alphabet, or people who obviously work from a script.

Even when one of their fellow in Russia says one wrong line and gets bagged by Putin's enforcers, the new narrative is that their friend was actually employed by the Other People, subverted, destroyed.

They write books and make shirts and sell images of their Great Leaders, the xenophobia grift is very lucrative as the people spend 50 dollars on a candle with their beloved xenophobe's image on it, or a tweet of theirs, or just what is claimed to be them.

It is all a paranoid, xenophobic world wide conspiracy theory, which gels very well with fascism claiming such is the reason for whatever they hate that day. A single crack on the pavement demands their attention and fear, and they are willingly give up their money, freedoms and rights to fascists who promise to make the Other People disappear in a bloody, horrifying murderfest.

All because they hate people they rarely, if ever, will meet anywhere, but convinced themselves that they are the main characters in a psychological political thriller, the underdogs fighting a great evil, even when they have some of the richest and most powerful demagouges on their side; they claim to be victims while praising anyone brutalising anyone else.

Their world is split to "Us, the good guys", "Them, the evil secret world" and "the rest who secretly agree with Us, and only do things because They control the world".

And when they win and the fascists march in their cities in a scene like what was used to scare US citizens in the late 1940s, they ignore the internal scream because their Great Leaders said it will be all okay. Even when their rights get removed. When they will be treated as secondary citizens. When they get stomped on by the boots.

And the xenophobe are obvious for this.

[riding-palominos-every-day]

 “what if aliens think we’re the aliens.” “the hell are you talking about-” perhaps Skittery and Race? (Bromance is great)

(also thank you! I love trying to get comedic timing right in writing lmao)

AH very late, apologies! Thank you for the prompt though, hope you enjoy :D

Racetrack Higgins had always thought himself to be a patient guy. He had to be, he was in charge of wrangling the younger boys both morning and night. Nothing ever really got under his skin.

Except Skittery, it seemed.

"I'm just sayin' Race," The other boy had never really cared much for his own sleep schedule, nor Race's, clearly, "what if aliens.. think we're the aliens?"

Not for the first time, Race found himself wishing Blink hadn't swapped bunks. The one-eyed boy snored, but at least he didn't spout nonsense like Skittery did.

"...What the hell are you talking about?" He asked, staring up at the bunk above as if the force of his gaze could shut Skittery up.

"Think about it," Skittery continued, "Aliens are only aliens to us because they're from other planets. So to them, we're from the other planet. Making us aliens, y'get me?"

Race thought for a moment. Another moment.

"Skittery. I have just had to spend half an hour reassuring Elmer and Buttons that vampires aren't real. If you start talkin' about aliens I'm gonna soak you. Got it?"

Skittery had a lot of... out-there ideas on how the world worked. Political conspiracies, theories on folktale creatures... every night he had some new concept to torment Race with.

"You don't get it, Race!" The bed creaked as Skittery shifted, and much to Race's despair he was shifting from his bunk down to Race's.

Oh joy.

Skittery settled himself at the end of the bed, staring at Race with an excited intensity never seen on his face during the day. Race stared back at him with a look of pain reserved only for the stupidest comments.

"Skit.. aliens ain't real. And if they were, meetin' you would make 'em wanna head back into space right away." Race mumbled, turning over in a feeble attempt to ignore the other boy.

"C'mon Race, a whole sky fulls stars an' planets and you don't think there's aliens?" Skittery scoffed, poking Race with his foot, "They're out there, and I bet they think we're aliens too."

Race had already had a long night. Finch had been extremely late coming home, sparking a flurry of panic, and Ike had taken nearly an hour to settle despite his and Mike's best efforts. He'd no doubt be up at least once to go take care of a nightmare, if not more. Somehow all of that was more appealing to deal with than Skittery's inane ramblings.

Some of the younger boys asked dumb questions, or came up with groundless theories on how the world worked. That was to be expected. But Race would've thought that at seventeen Skittery would've shut up with his conspiracies.

"Skittery." He sat up, nearly nose to nose with the taller boy, "Not that I ain't fascinated with all this, but it's gotta be nearly three. Now either get your ass back up on your own bunk and pipe down, or I'm sendin' you next door when one'a the kids has a bad dream."

He was up on his own bunk so quick Race felt the bunk shake. Satisfied, Race lay back down, until Skittery's head appeared in his line of vision.

"When the aliens get here, don't be surprised if they test on you first." He muttered, before retreating. Silence finally settled over the bunk room. Race closed his eyes, relieved that was the end of it- for tonight, at least.

[orthopoogle]

What made Catholic Tumblr from 3 years ago as toxic as Ortho Twitter rn?

Also, if Twitterinas bothered to pray for people, even truly sinful ones, more than they condemn innocent babies the world would be in a better place

OrthoX might be even worse now that I’ve seen the brunt of the “unbaptized babies go to hell” discourse, tbh.

But basically, back in its heyday, Catholic Tumblr was filled with a bunch of armchair theologians who thought they knew better than priests or bishops on many subjects, and there were a lot of cold takes like, “If you chew the Eucharist instead of letting it dissolve in your mouth, you are disrespecting Christ!!!” and, “If your priest tells you you can go up for a blessing in lieu of Communion, then he’s wrong!!!” and, “If you go to a Novus Ordo Mass instead of a Latin Mass, then you aren’t attending a valid Mass!!!” It also wasn’t uncommon to see popular and judgmental posts going around saying things like, “I’m side-eyeing the people in the long line for Communion each Sunday when I never see that long of a line for Confession!” and, “I’m suspicious of families with only two or three kids!” and, “I cringe every time I see someone receive Communion in the hands or without going to their knees!”

There was also generally a lot of picking fights with non-Catholics over the stupidest things and then crying persecution whenever the Protestant or Orthodox or whoever decided to bite back (which I honestly still see some of today, tbh), as well as general nastiness surrounding wishing damnation on anyone who remotely disagreed with OP, spreading stupid and LARPy conspiracy theories like, “Outer space is fake!!!” and full-on Holocaust denialism, bullying working women and telling them their only holy place is barefoot and pregnant in the home if they aren’t choosing to become nuns, Catholic girls actively messaging the boyfriends of taken guys and trying to trashtalk their girlfriends to the guys behind the girlfriends’ backs, insisting anyone who took the COVID vaccine was a disgusting heretic who would burn in hell for receiving the Mark of the Beast, the @tradcatfem fandom, it just goes on and on and on.

Most of the main offenders are either gone now or may have remade on more private blogs. Since the average age of Catholic Tumblr was roughly 18-23 back then, I’m hoping a lot of this was just misplaced zeal from young converts who have since matured more in their faith now that they’ve had the chance to experience more of a real Catholic life outside of the Internet. It’s just sad to see all of this being repeated in Orthodox circles now, especially since my real experience with Orthodoxy is a lot more wholesome and enriching than that, and the real life Orthodox Christians I know are some of the nicest people I’ve ever met.

[aokozaki]

what. is. your. opinion. on. robotics. ;. notes. ?.

If Chaos;Head NoAH is like "SciADV Evangelion", then Robotics;Notes is "SciADV Gurran Lagann".

R;N is confined by SciADV's hard sci-fi setting, but still manages to be a super robot story despite this through sheer force of will.

It's the little details, like how (right after being nabbed and brought to JAXA), Akiho reasons that you see this sort of thing in anime all the time, they've obviously been pulled in by the government to build a giant robot of justice!

And no sooner has Subaru called this Akiho's stupidest idea yet, does a representative of JAXA ask them, hey kids, wanna build a giant robot with JAXA's official support and funding?

It ties into series wide ideas that hopes and dreams and delusions can change reality. SciADV already works off goofy chuuni conspiracy theory lore, so chuuni characters (Ayase, Okabe, Akiho) are often able to call plot points in advance.

So what I'm trying to say is that Akiho can use Spiral Energy.

[deaneverafter]

I can't decide what is the stupidest fandom conspiracy theory floated by the cursed finale. That Sam abandoning Dean, leaving him to die, was some sort of noble action or better yet, sacrifice, that destiel is real, or that Chuck took over poor little devil baby, Jack, and not that Jack never really actually cared about Dean to begin with (something we've seen before, canonically, concretely) 🙄 In the end, Dean really only had himself to depend on, huh. No sense of loyalty, no sense of care, from all the people he sacrificed so much for. They didn't deserve Dean, nor his loyalty or selflessness. Smh, Dean should've just left them all and gone to live his life away from these selfish people.

Edit 1: another stupid conspiracy theory, that Jess just reminded me, one that might take the cake as the most vile, that Dean offed himself on purpose, because he couldn't live without Castiel (because it isn't as if he'd lived through that multiple times and been okay, right? Because it isn't as if dying wouldn't have changed being without Castiel? Never mind that if he really had feelings for Castiel and wanted him back, going to the empty to get him out would be a lot more logical, and Dean is the smartest person in this story), which reminds me of the other one, that Dean offed himself on purpose, because he thought he was holding Sam captive in the hunting life (never mind the fact that they've had this conversation multiple times with Sam telling him he wasn't holding him hostage, never mind that Sam has made his choice several times, never mind that he came back because yellow eyes killed Jessica, not because of anything that Dean did). Never mind most importantly, that Dean wants to live. We've seen that over and over again, him choosing to live, to fight through everything, and in the finale, we actually see him planning a life outside of hunting

[anothersebastianblog]

Off topic, but I like that this blog is a way more peaceful place than the other one(s). People debating on the stupidest things, attacking each other, insulting Annabelle, psychoanalyzing Sebastian, making up crazy theories and assumptions. I feel like they have too much free time/are chronically online and don't know how to handle different opinions. Or they're just rude, idk 😅

Thanks! 🩷

Well people discuss on here as well just not all the time and over stupid things sometimes too 🤣

And yeah usually people who can’t handle different opinions and FACTS that goes against their weird conspiracy theories are also rude

[sluttsumu]

HAIKYUU BOYS WHEN THEY’RE HIGH

pairing: atsumu, suna, iwaizumi, bokuto x f!reader

warnings: 18+, use of recreational marijuana, use of the pet name “princess” (atsumu), bokuto being funny asf, suna’s is a lil sad if you really look into it

wc: 0.8??

a/n: i queued this yesterday but it didn’t work, so here it is your faves while high, suna’s was not supposed to be angsty i don’t know what happened LOL also not proofread lol.

# ATSUMU

atsumu is horny.

the only thing on his mind is making you cum as many times as humanly possible. you thought smoking with him would be fun, which it was, till he started laughing and chasing you around your apartment with grabby hands.

“pretty baby, c’mere, i wanna taste ya”

you thought it was hilarious, but he was serious. staring at you with pink, half lidded eyes from the other side of the kitchen counter. he was gonna get you, no matter what. you couldn’t contain your laughter as you thought of how to escape him from catching you and never letting go. he stared intensely, palms face down on the marble.

he’d definitely caught you in a rock and a hard place. you falsely run to one side, meanwhile he flinches thinking that you’d actually run that way. he chuckles at your face as you try and think of how to get out of this predicament. thinking his distracted you run this time, but you athlete boyfriend’s quick reflexes were something you were no match for.

“HA! I GOTCHA” he yelled engulfing you in his arms as you playfully squirmed in his grasp. “ugh you’re too fast for me” you whine as he carried you walking towards your bedroom.

“‘tsumu you smell like weed”

“ ‘m gonna make ya cum sooo much princess ” he chuckled, closing your room door. atsumu was gone, his mind could not be saved from becoming a horny hell.

“did you even hear what i said?”

“let’s make some pretty babies, baby”

now that he had you his mind was clouded everything went in one ear and out the other. he didn’t hear a damn thing you just said.

# IWAIZUMI

iwaizumi is sleepy.

at first when you brought up the idea of him getting high with you for once and, he wasn’t all for it. back in college when he went to UCI he was definitely a cigarette smoker, and didn’t find weed all that interesting. having a background in nutrition he knew all about the drug and didn’t think it’d be a good idea.

but then you made edibles…..and he ate them.

it was a complete accident, he just saw cookies and thought to eat them. you walk into the kitchen to see him on his third cookie, lord have mercy. “hajime— are those my…” you couldn’t bring yourself to finish you sentence in fear he’d frantically freak out. he arched a brow giving you a confused look as he continued to eat the sweet treat.

“those are my edibles…”

the rest of the cookie was now on the floor. iwaizumi’s eyes went wide but instead of the panicking reaction you expected out of him, he laughed. he laughed? you now stood confused at your boyfriends contagious laughter, which causes you to laugh along with him.

five minutes later, iwaizumi is slumped. dead asleep as if you weren’t just laughing with him a few minutes ago. though being 5’11 and probably 190+ pounds of raw muscle, he’s a complete lightweight. you rolled your eyes at him taking up your entire bed. taking out your phone to snap a picture of him, knowing that he will not remember any of this tomorrow.

# BOKUTO

bokuto is a mess.

this man is laughing, crying, yelling, saying the stupidest shit. just all of the above. he’s the type to make crazy conspiracy theories that actually….make sense.

“kou— what’s the colour of my shirt again?” you snicker barely able to make it through your sentence. “i-it’s, dark white” the silence is loud as the two of you stare at one another before absolutely dying of loud, boisterous laughter. bokuto is on the floor, crying meanwhile you hold your stomach from laughing so hard.

“what— the FUCK, is dark white?” you yell, tears brimming in your eyes. before he answers you finish by saying “THIS IS GREY” in all technicalities bokuto was right, grey essentially is….dark white. everything in this moment was just too funny, getting high with him was the right decision.

“THAT IS NOT GREY, DARK WHITE.” his face and neck are flushed pink attempting to prove his point.

“OKAY SO WHATS LIGHT GREY?” you question giving him a look of ‘let’s see what you say this time’.

“UHM— I-ITS…..LIGHT DARK WHITE?” he answered nothing short of confidence and confusion in his tone. you quickly arched a brow thinking about the stupidity the you just heard. light. dark. white. he was wrong so wrong, but also so fucking right.

“kou lets go to bed, you are tired very tired” he looked at you confused as you attempted to pick him up off the floor and miserably failing falling o to him..

“you’re a fucking idiot”

“your idiot babe”

# SUNA

suna is touchy.

he wants to feel on your body, and have you close to him. he has a very nonchalant and horny high. he definitely has you seated in his lap while blowing smoke in your face. he certainly was nicer under the influence, you wished he was like that all the time.

“you look so pretty like this” he smiles eyes blinking slowly. his hands secured themselves on the sides of your waist, he was just staring at your as if you were the most precious gem in the world. his eyes wavered back and fourth from your lips to your eyes, he wants to kiss you, he wants to show his pretty girl all the affection he has to offer. “you always do this” you sigh eyes steering away from his.

“what’re you talking about?” did he really have the audacity to ask you that question? this was an endless cycle one that seems to never stop. he grabs your face bringing you eyes back to meet his low red ones. “you only compliment me when you’re high.”

his hands run up and down your sides, caressing all the parts of your body that he loved so much. “that’s not true pretty baby.” but whether you stuck to your gut feeling or not, he always talked you out of it every time. you felt stupid for doubting yourself after his words, but each time you managed to convince yourself that you were wrong.

“i want a kiss” he pouts, and what rin wants rin gets. no matter the cost.

he encases your lips in a kiss in which you immediately try to pull away from before feeling his hand of your neck forcing your head in place, you hated that you loved it, loved him. the way he touched you telling you how much he loved you and to an extent he did.

suna rintarō was your drug, and you needed your daily fix.

sluttsumu 2021

[shingia]

✗ NIGHT ROUTINES THINGS ✗

no this wasn’t in my wips post. yes this is very impulsively written. and kinda self indulgent?

-> timeskip! akaashi, kuroo, semi, suga, iwaizumi

-> domestic fluff, all the good stuff (wait that rhymed) <33

-> cw : food mention

— AKAASHI

it’s him always being in charge of ironing your clothes because he genuinely likes it. it’s ordering food from onigiri miya at least three times a week. it’s drinking herbal teas on your balcony, wrapped in a blanket that keeps you warm while watching the stars.

it’s spending more time choosing a movie than actually watching it. and it’s him resting his head on your lap as you play with his hair. it’s scented candles on your bedside and a pair of glasses on his. and it’s falling asleep on his chest, lulled by his heartbeat and his voice as he reads the book of your choice.

— KUROO

it’s him immediately slumping down on the couch when he comes home, loosening his tie with a sigh but immediately forgetting about his troubles at work as soon as you greet him with a kiss. it’s nice dinners cooked together because he refuses to let you do all the work. it’s also him insisting on dancing with you in the kitchen ever since you made him watch la la land once... it’s usually to « a lovely night ».

it’s ranking your face masks based on very precise criteria. it’s him stealing your moisturizer because it smells so much better than his. but most of all, it’s falling asleep on the couch but always waking up in your bed, tucked under the covers.

— SEMI

it’s realizing that your fridge is empty at 8pm and going on grocery trips to buy whatever your stomach is craving right now. it’s plucking his eyebrows on the couch while he comes up with the stupidest songs ideas (his first single will be named « tonight’s spicy yakitori »). it’s laying on his back while exploring the depths of youtube, and him hitting your butt with his heels just because he loves getting on your nerves.

it’s being in charge of the playlist while the other is in the shower, usually around 1am. it’s taking off the other’s makeup if they’re too tired to do it. and it’s ending up falling asleep in his arms with youtube still playing in the background.

— SUGA

it’s helping him mark his student’s homework, but only after promising that you won’t tell anyone. it’s watching tv shows with the worst imdb ratings just to make fun of it together, but every once in a while watching a really good one that has you talking about the ending until way too late.

it’s hot chocolates in which he always puts too many marshmallows. it’s a satisfied grin on his face whenever you’re brushing his hair after his shower. it’s also lively conversations about conspiracy theories while brushing your teeth. and it’s him always hugging you to sleep, whether you‘ve had a good or a bad day.

— IWAIZUMI

it’s going for a run when the sun is starting to set. it’s writing movie names on tiny pieces of paper, folding them in half and putting them in a bowl to pick the one that you’ll watch tonight (and him writing godzilla three times). it’s massaging his shoulders until he starts to drift off, even though he promised he wouldn’t.

it’s him saying « tell me about your day » instead of « how was your day » because he doesn’t want a short answer. it’s spending hours planning your next holidays together even though neither of you feel like leaving the bed right now. it’s falling asleep with his arm around your waist, your minds filled with plans for the future.

taglist : @toworuu @catwithangerissues @miyumiya @livy384 @k0u-minamo2 @fullsundear @hsjvwq @kelsuuki @hiraeth-z @velvetvirgos @kirishimas-manly-eyeliner @47meow @japanesevenom @geektastic84 @noir-blanches-blog @idontlikeyourjob @seiri-ami @admiringlove @nachotrash @kellesvt @aintyourholy @Moonlaeli @catchmewiddershins @duhsies @devilgirlcrybabiey @crystal-lilac @ijustwantfreenetflix @mimaki @maitenight @xomiya

[kuvvydraws]

how bout some friend hcs for luque?

Luque is all about teasing, his comments constantly poking fun at things, but he’s capable of keeping himself quiet and reigning his tongue back when his bullying becomes too strong.

He cooks! His skill is very average, but it’s still a step up from the other two skeletons - and he’ll make treats for his friends if they come visit him.

Cool rocks as gifts! Sometimes... he likes rocks very much, but he can let go of one or two occasionally.

Plant gifts! this is much more common - he really likes nature, so getting a plant from him is a symbol of a steady friendship.

He’s protective and a bit of a mom if his friends hava anxiety. He’s not going to go overboard but he has no problem being the center of attention or ordering for everyone, things like that.

He’s very loud but actually will shut up to listen to people. He’s the one guy who ignores the rest of the people to cheer up that friend others talk over and coax them to talk, even if he’s the only one paying attention.

Still, lots of insinuations. He can’t and won’t be stopped.

Banter! Mess with him, provoke him! He likes arguing about the stupidest shit, please. This eventually evolves in a lot of inner jokes, which is both adorable and exasperating.

Calls you at 4am because he just thought of the newest conspiracy theory and he needs help polishing it and showing it to the world.

Comes at you and slaps some tickets in your hand without previous warning, it’s movie time, let’s go to the cinema! No, it’s not because he noticed you were bummed out or anything, he just wants to go out and watch something, zip it!

[astrologyninaa]

🎄 Some thoughts about astrology 🎄

since my game is installing.

🦈 Why are so many music artists a Pisces suns? Like, I'm from Finland and here ALL the famous artists are Pisces suns 😭

🦈 Sagittarius placements tend to be VEEERY tall (compared to me lol) I am 5'1'' and I feel like an ant when next to them hahaaha

🦈 I know just 2 capricorns and they both are so boring XD I'm sorry but they just aren't my type :(

🦈 Leo Risings are so so polite ahhh and their hair!! 😍 My boyfriend is a Leo Rising and I really love how he has a messy kind of hair :3 Love them <3

🦈 Capricorn placements are interested in cultures and foreign languages. I have a Capricorn Mars and I love love love Greek culture and the language 😍😍 And I am good at foreign languages 😋

🦈 Libras aren't good at hiding their emotions. They feel them very strong and WILL show it. Keep fighting Libras, I know you are having a hard time:(

🦈 Tell me how Pisces Moons are so so intuitive? And they know all the things before they even happen. How? 😳

🦈 Virgos likes dogs, Libras likes cats <3

🦈 Geminis can be really annoying. Like they are so sarcastic and will annoy you almost all the time. But when you do something to them, they take so hard and becomes ✨sad✨

🦈 Capricorn Risings are DARK. They just appear like that. They be very dark, like their humor, clothes, brain, lungs💀 I'm sorry they just be so dark xd

🦈 Also Scorpio is dark but not the same. They have a dark humor, yes, but they aren't like depression-like dark. They just be like that sometimes.

🦈 Aries Suns (and other Aries aspects as well) LAUGHS AT EVERYTHING. I swear I'm always laughing at the stupidest things HAAHHA I can't stop it. Especially when I'm with my boyfriend, I laugh at everything he says 😔👋🏻

🦈 Aquariuses💘 I heckin love them! Why? I don't know, maybe their interests about spirituality and space and aliens? 👽 they are the best people to talk to about conspiracy theories hahaha I LOVE YOU GUYS ❤️ keep your UFOs going 😚

🦈 Anddd, Tauruses. Please mind your own business. I know too many Taureans AND. They just can't keep their noses off of other people! Ughh.

🦈 Omg I almost forgot about Cancers!! They are so sweet. But then... They just become an aggressive p*ssya** and they YELL. And cry, of course 😩. They have a hard time, ik. And I feel sorry for them because they have to go through all that. Much love, please try to be more chill and calm ❤️ mwah!

[wehatejulietsimms]

Lol TED Talk anon her to that one person bitching about me because I stood up for myself when Angel talked shit about me behind my back (twice), lied about it to my face and then lied about the entire situation only to prove herself wrong later, misgendered me multiple times (on purpose), and mentioned me and blamed me for writing an ask so someone that I knew sent me the screenshots cause they thought I should know that she was talking about me, and I defended myself- get your head out of your ass. I am not obligated to like Angel just because we share the same opinion about Juliet. She uses misogynistic slurs against Juliet like bitch and even c*nt and calls her a Barbie. She shames how Juliet looks ALL the time. She rarely posts actual proof or receipts against anything actually problematic Juliet has done, just posts unwarranted hate towards her (she literally has multiple posts about Juliet's stories and posts dedicated to just insulting her for quite literally nothing) which is the biggest reason that people never take Juliet haters seriously. If Angel is the 'sweetest person you've ever met', why does she put down Juliet for the stupidest things, have a history of talking shit about her 'friends' behind their backs calling them rats and accusing them of backstabbing people (and yes that's actually what she said about me all because I followed andysmouf AFTER she disliked Juliet and apologized for the body-shaming jokes 💀), use unnecessary and flat-out derogatory insults towards people just because they don't agree with her on something, believe the most messed up, misogynistic, and racist shit like Trump is innocent, BLM and democrats were created to break up American families, George Floyd is alive, and COVID if fake, or misgenders and deadnames people? But sure, sweetest person you've ever met. Also, not to mention that the only real 'grievance' that Angel has against me is that I allegedly told people to 'attack Andy' when all I said was that he should be held accountable IF he does something wrong, and she took that as 'Marz is telling people to attack Andy now tell me what he ever did wrong that ISN'T Scout' (whom she said 'deserves' any hate going to her if Andy fans attack her for talking about her past relationship with him 😐). She unnecessarily brought me up again because she assumed I wrote an ask about her (and apologies to that anon for being dragged into this shit, sorry for Angel being an asshole to you for having your own valid opinion) and someone let me know about it so I stood up for myself and called her out for being rude, misogynistic, and transphobic (and then later an ex friend of hers sent me the messages where she was talking about all those crazy and messed up extremist conspiracy theories). If it bothers you so much that someone spoke against your BFF or whatever, all I got to say is get your head out of your biased ass lmao.

Also this is a Juliet and BVB discussion blog, not a 'Someone hurt my feelings for having valid opinions and talking bad about my friend so I'm gonna post about me bitching about and insulting them for everyone to read'. If you have a problem you can just DM me 💀✌🏽

.

[firinniee]

I can't sleep again so I'll talk too much. Sorry. ;)

But by the way, if we are talking about the main six characters of students in HP (I will have to do a separate post about Draco), the movie did not spoil only Luna, in my opinion, her film version is much better and is the true image of Luna that Rowling had in head.

But first. Speaking of the golden trio, Harry in the movie became the eternal winner, it focused only on his positive side, while at the same time sucking up remnants of intelligence and charming clumsiness. Ron was a complete rude in the movies, they portrayed him as a stupid comedy character who reminded Harry that he was an orphan or circumvented Luna in the last part (even though he defended her in the book) and actually made his relationship with Hermione very shallow. And if we are talking about her, Hermione was presented as knowing everything and at the same time incredibly beautiful, which in a way took away from her the imperfections and flaws that she dealt with herself. She made mistakes in the book and learned from it.

As for the silver trio, I'm devastated. Neville was stripped of the respect and skill he had been working on for the fifth part because he was made a waiter at a party, and Ginny was... better left unmentioned. The only thing in common between the book and the movie Ginny is that they were both beautiful, but in the adaptation she was stripped of her entire personality. But fortunately all of this saves Luna. She was played by an actress who is actually Luna, in addition, she is small, delicate and has a very dreamy voice. This was what this character was missing. The book Luna was very wild and loud, she burst out laughing on the flour and was able to snap of fuss. Plus, her behavior was more like flat-earthen, she believing in the stupidest conspiracy theories, and in the movie, believing in non-existent creatures was sweet. Plus Luna in the movie found Harry on the train because of these creatures so... suddenly they weren't made up just in her mind? The film skips, for example, "pictures of friends in the girl's room, which showed her a bond with them, but generally speaking, Luna is the only character who, thanks to the film, became better, and this made of her very popular character, who has so many scenes. On the other hand, Hermione, Ron, Neville, Ginny and Harry were stripped of what was best about them and which showed that they were human too.