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britishassistant · 4 months ago

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The Villainous Paranoiac Sues for Character Defamation (2)

“Nii-san?!”

The lump in Idia Shroud’s bed lets out a pitiful groan.

“Nii-san, are you alright?! Are you hungry?! Sick?!” Ortho demands. “Hold on, I’ll do a scan to see what’s wrong!”

A pale, long fingered hand emerges from beneath the covers. It points languidly.

“…sekai…”

“Eh?” The android crowds closer to the bed. “What is it Nii-san? Your computer? Did something bad happen in one of your games? To Precipice Morai? Did an anime get cancelled?”

“…Isekai…”

“Isekai?” The android asks, confused. “Nii-san, what—?”

“I CAN’T ACCEPT THAT A REAL LIFE ISEKAI WOULD COME FROM SUCH A LAME LIGHT NOVEL!!”

It’s with this impassioned cry that Idia Shroud throws off his duvet, hair flaring wildly.

“After all, there are so many worlds that would be so much more likely to be real?! A tech punk world like LoPri just violates several laws of physics, not to mention thaumaturgy?? Plus the characters are so bland and uninspiring, how is it meant to enrich the blackened hearts of this Wonderland if they’re real?! At least if they were from Hyrule or Laputa or Exandria, they could teach us valuable life lessons that would lead to world improvement!”

His fist hits the mattress. “But no! And on top of that, this happens at the same time as they’re leaking that a LoPri movie is in the works?! That’s so cheap!! It’s like an awful marketing tactic that takes your cherished childhood hopes and dreams and crushes them for a few wads of madol!! I can’t believe—”

“Nii-san, wait!” Ortho begs. “What do you mean, there’s been a real life isekai? The sensors you installed should have noticed a large amount of energy coming from something like a world-crossing event.”

Idia jabs an accusatory finger at his computer screen, where the illustration and photo are posed side by side. “Apparently, not if they hijack Night Raven’s carriages to get here!”

Ortho’s optic sensors dilate and contract as his facial recognition software runs.

“…It’s a match.” He says. “Barring the 4% deviations from differing mediums, this person looks almost exactly like the illustrations from Lost Princess. And the Dark Mirror reported they’re entirely magicless…”

Idia jumps when the facsimile of his younger brother appears in his space. “Nii-san, what should we do?! If she really is from this other world, she’s a criminal, isn’t she? Should STYX take her into preventative custody??”

“Eh—Calm down, Ortho.” The elder Shroud says sternly, as if he hadn’t been in near hysterics only a moment ago. “It’s illegal to lock people up if they haven’t done anything wrong yet.”

“But Nii-san—!”

“Besides, as a bad guy she’s like, seriously wimpy.” It takes a moment or two of flailing in the bedclothes before Idia’s phone is retrieved. “See? According to the wiki, even the worst stuff she does is thanks to abusing her rich family’s power and money. Without that, she’s as pathetic as some hero who’s had all his strength sucked out. Even more harmless than a level one slime.”

Ortho’s synthetic brow furrows. “I guess…”

“Heh. Some of those LoPri simps online might even say that this is divine retribution. Getting banished to a world where she’s worth less than nothing.” Idia slumps, flicking through his apps idly. “Ah, the fates are cruel. Why’d I have to be inflicted with this?”

“I will monitor the villainess, Nii-san.” Ortho announces. “If she attempts to partake in any criminal behavior, it will be reported to the authorities, so Nii-san’s daily school life may continue unimpeded.”

“Eh? Well, uh.” Idia’s attention fights with the gacha he’s just opened, but ultimately surrenders to the colorful world within. “Only if it’s a low priority thing, okay?”

“Roger!”

***

Vil is distracted.

Not enough for his makeup to be anything less than perfect. Certainly not enough to make his class work, modeling, or acting suffer.

But enough that the poison apple he’s trying to polish has nearly given him the slip twice already.

That is unacceptable. If he cannot maintain a firm standard of discipline, how is this Epel meant to absorb any of his lessons?

Vil cannot allow this to continue.

He saw the villainess the magicless interloper yesterday morning, on his way to History class. Wearing some truly shapeless castoffs that can only have come from the dumping ground that passes for a Lost and Found, raking leaves away from the statue of the Beautiful Queen.

Vil had mostly convinced himself that it was purely his imagination. An unfortunate side effect of working on so many projects at once.

Surely what he had heard was merely a word that sounded like the fantasy names his script contains. The author had to take inspiration from somewhere, after all. And word association tricked him into believing that some potato who bore a little resemblance to his mental image of the villainess was, in fact, the person in question.

An honest, if slightly embarrassing mistake.

And then Rook reported over breakfast that the magicless janitor had somehow wormed their way into becoming a student, and a Prefect. Of the most prestigious magic school in the country. Despite the aforementioned complete lack of.

And all those foolish doubts Vil had spent so long laying to rest reared their ugly heads again.

A long, perfectly manicured finger taps the cafeteria table.

The potato is sitting with Clover and Diamond from Heartslaybul, alongside two first years and that little monster. From his position, Vil can see the back of their head if he inclines his own just slightly.

“Epel.” The boy in question jumps at the sound of his name. “Tuck your elbows in, your dorm mates shouldn’t need to defend themselves every time you lift food to your mouth.”

“My ba—ah, I mean! I, I apologize.”

Immediately, his arms go from imitating a chicken’s spread wings to an eastern dragon’s bent forelegs.

Behind Epel and slightly to the left, Rosehearts blocks Vil’s view of the magicless prefect. With the way his shoulders are tensing, his voice raising, he’ll likely be there a while as he metes out his slovenly attempts at discipline on his juniors.

Vil suppresses a grimace as he sighs. He’s going to get frown lines at this rate…

He needs to put this from his mind. If the sheer force of his not inconsiderable will is somehow lacking, then he needs to try something else. Obtain some definitive proof one way or the other so this irritating matter can be settled once and for all.

Proof…

A collection of ideas begin swirling in Vil’s head. Nothing concrete, just associations and possibilities of possibilities. Not enough for a proper plan of action.

Not yet, anyway.

***

Idia’s back cracks as he stretches.

“GG Muscle Red-shi,” He mutters as he types. “You carried hard for that secret boss encounter.”

Only a few moments after he hits send, Muscle Red’s response pops up.

Muscle Red: You give me too much credit, my friend. It was your strategic thinking that won us the day.

Muscle Red: This old man will need to log off shortly, but I wish you a pleasant evening and good hunting.

Gloomurai: NP Muscle Red-shi! GN

He tries to ignore the disappointment in his chest as Muscle Red’s avatar disappears. It’ll be hard to top the fun he had in that raid, so he may as well just log off this game. Maybe catch up on some of the anime he’s been letting build up so he can binge it all at once…

Ah, but there was that one that Ortho said he might be interested in, but that Idia had been too busy to start watching yet! The one about an otaku security robot that was exasperated with the scientists it had to look after…

“Hey, Ortho, we can start I’m a Murderbot But I’m Keeping A Diary…” Idia turns to where his brother is meant to be charging in the power station in the corner.

It’s empty.

“Ortho?”

There’s no one in the room except Idia right now.

He tries to tell himself that it’s fine, that Ortho’s fine, he’s probably just…just gone on a snack run? Yeah, he must’ve realized Idia was getting low on food and decided to help! What a good, kind brother Idia has! There’s no way he’s in any kind of trouble that he needs Idia to save him from, right?

Right??

Idia’s able to stave off the anxiety for a record-breaking four point two seconds before he turns to his computer, bringing up the “Find My Brother” program and sending his tablet whizzing out the door to the coordinates it brings up.

Why is he in the library at this time of night? Idia gnaws on his fingernails as the tablet gets closer, and prepares to use the mic once he can see Ortho’s back.

“…you’re planning to cause trouble, I will report you to the Headmaster and the relevant authorities.”

Idia straightens at his brother’s serious tone coming through the speakers.

It’s the work of a moment to gain access to the feeds of the library’s security cameras. Although there’s only three of them, and they’re really shoddily placed for actual monitoring purposes…

“Oh that’s rich.” The villainess scoffs, low voice made tinny over his speakers. “I’m not the one causing trouble here. Besides, it’s a public library. All students are free to look up reference materials on whatever they’d like.”

“Materials on restricted subjects are monitored.” Ortho declares. “Failure to return them to the library is logged against a student’s profile. You have not returned [SEVEN] books by their assigned due date.”

“So, Overblot is considered a restricted subject then.” Uh, hard pass on the villainess’ tone in that reply, it’s just as sus as some sixth ranger smiling to themselves while everyone else’s back is turned. “Why exactly is that? Is it the same reason there’s no primary sources on it in any of the history books or scholarly articles?”

“That is classified information.” His baby brother says coolly. “You do not have even the lowest level clearance, so it does not concern you.”

The villainess’ voice drops dangerously. “Doesn’t concern me?”

Idia begins prepping to set off the fire alarms in the headmaster’s suite. If the villainess makes any move against his brother, he’ll not only make sure the ultimate authority figure is there to catch her, he’ll publish her past and every embarrassing search she’s made since coming to Twisted Wonderland online for everyone to see. Maybe even post her address online so those LoPro simps can avenge their faves in person?

“Things that jeopardize my safety don’t concern me? Things that endanger my wellbeing don’t concern me? Threats to my life don’t concern me?!”

It’d be easier to watch if the villainess hit the wall, flipped a table, threw some books on the floor, something. Instead Idia’s on the edge of his seat, eyes fixed on his monitor like he’ll get jumpscared if he looks away.

He flinches when the villainess does, movement made jerky by the old cameras. Seriously, this is why he can’t stand live action analog horror!

But it is kinda weird how the figure opposite his brother is hunching over the table like that. Almost as if standing is difficult?

“..f you think,” Ortho’s mics can barely pick up the sound. “That I’m just going to wait in the wings until another one finally kills me—that I’m going to die quietly—then you’re sorely mistaken. I don’t care who you are. I’m not going to let anyone or anything stop me. I refuse to end up in some forgotten grave in this twisted world!”

Kind of a mid monologue tbh. He was low-key expected something…more villainous? But considering how trash LoPri is it makes sense.

It’s the kind of cringe that almost makes you feel bad for the one you’re meant to be rooting against.

“You’re injured.” Ortho says, uncertain. “Partially healed rib fractures and a torn posterior tibiotalar ligament. How—?”

“Sorry, but I’m afraid that doesn’t concern you…?”

“Ortho Shroud.” His kindhearted brother supplies.

“Shroud-san.” The first year bows stiffly. “I’d like to say it’s been nice to make your acquaintance, but it really hasn’t.”

The villainess attempts to stride away from Ortho—well limps is more like it, holding herself stiffly and putting much more weight on her left ankle than her right, when did that happen? Surely it would’ve been flagged somewhere in the school records if something serious enough to cause those injuries had happened. It’d be noted in her student file, if nothing else.

Idia frowns. Then he accesses the school’s mainframe.

Wow this is. Really half-assed. You’d think the headmaster would put a bit more effort into filling out this kind of thing!

It’s a weird parody of the file Idia created for himself and Ortho in his second year at Night Raven, which the headmaster was too inept to create himself. In Idia’s, Ortho is nominally listed as a student, even if he doesn’t get graded or even enrolled in any classes like a regular student.

In the villainess’, half of that careful formatting has been thrown out the window in the name of grading a “two in one” student. Some of the information is missing or contradictory, and the rest seems to focus on the magical familiar rather than the human prefect.

There is a section way down the bottom of the file where there’s some notes from Nurse Kamac recording visits to the infirmary. But for some reason, the broken ribs have the amendment from the headmaster of “incurred before enrollment” and so don’t list how it happened, and the only notes for the ankle injury are that it occurred a few days later during a “Heartslaybul dorm head challenge”.

Idia pushes his fingers against his eyes as he groans, stretching his aching back and trying to crack it again.

This has nothing to do with him and Ortho. That much the vi—Prefect had gotten right. It may be weird that sh-they’re checking out all the books on Overblot the library has to offer, and are this badly injured only within a few days of starting the new semester, but it could be nothing! Certainly it’s not enough to be worth reporting to their parents.

“Ah, Nii-san? Were you looking for me?” Ortho sounds apologetic over his speakers. “Don’t worry, I’ll come back to the dorm right away!”

“Mm. I was thinking we could start binging that series together…”

“It’s not good for you to stay up late watching anime, Nii-san!” His younger brother scolds. “…But, I guess a few episodes of I’m a Murderbot But I’m Keeping A Diary can’t hurt!”

He grins. “I’ll get it queued up for when you get back. TTYL.”

Yeah, this is definitely worth more of his time than worrying about some weird magicless Prefect. Even if part of him itches at the memory of h-them saying “another one finally kills me”…

Definitely not his problem. Definitely not gonna think about it.

Definitely

***

It would seem that the Headmaster has decided to make the magicless Prefect into a gopher-slash-amateur investigator rather than looking into the mysterious injuries of each dorm’s Magift players himself.

Vil’s heard from Rook and from some of his other dorm members that the first year and their little monster have been interviewing everyone involved in an accident.

Of course, it’s only a matter of time until they begin questioning those who have not been affected, to rule out some causes if nothing else.

So, when Rook spots them, along with a redheaded potato, a blue potato, and Diamond, he motions his vice dorm head to bring them over.

“You must have had some reason for spying on us.” He says to the motley group. “Out with it and maybe I’ll let you off with a warning.”

“Busted~” Diamond says cheerily. “Well, can you guys keep a secret?”

“Mais, bien sûr Monsieur Magicam!” Rook proclaims. “Consider our lips sealed!”

“We think that the injured Magift players are being deliberately targeted.” The blue haired second potato says. “We’re investigating potential suspects who could be behind the a—”

“Dude!” The redheaded first potato hisses. “You can’t just TELL ‘em!”

“Yeah!” The monster yowls. “They’re suspects!! If we tell ‘em that, they’ll know we think they’re suspicious!!”

“You just told them anyway…” The magicless first year mutters.

“Hm.” It doesn’t surprise him as much as it should to hear that this year’s games are being deliberately sabotaged. And given a certain someone’s uncharacteristic enthusiasm at the dorm head meeting recently, he’s fairly sure he knows who’s behind it.

“While it is rather rude of you to cast aspersions on myself and my vice dorm head like this, I believe we could provide some assistance with this matter.”

The monster perks up. “Great! Then—”

“However.” Vil crosses his arms. “I’m a busy man. I can’t offer my assistance without being assured that it’ll be worth my time. I need something in return first.”

“Man, shoulda figured.” Potato #1 sighs. Potato #2 shakes his head. “Nothing’s ever easy, is it?”

Diamond hushes both of his underclassmen. “So? Whaddya need, Vil-san?”

Vil carefully does not smile. Not yet. “You. I need you to help me with something.”

The magicless prefect blinks at the end of his pointer finger. “Huh? Wh—if you don’t mind my asking, why me?”

“Your presence compared to the others’ makes you most suited for the task.” He turns to his bag and flicks through the contents until he finds what he’s looking for. “It’s hardly a trial. I just need someone like you to fill in for a certain role.”

Vil holds out a copy of the script.

The magicless prefect reaches out warily, as if Vil’s handing them a serpent rather than a few pieces of paper.

“This is the script for a movie I’ll be starring in.” He says. “I’d like you to help me practice my cues. You’ll be reading the lines that aren’t highlighted.”

And, seeing Diamond’s hand creep towards his phone, he adds. “Given that this is confidential until the film’s release, the production company has been assured that I refuse to be party to any leaks, and will prosecute those who create them to the fullest extent of the law.”

Diamond’s hand suddenly changes direction to scratch his cheek instead.

The Prefect takes the script, eyes scanning over it.

“Eh—how come the names are blacked out?” Potato #1 asks.

“To prevent leaks, of course.” Vil lies smoothly. “Now, do you want my help, or don’t you?”

The villainess’s teeth snag on her lower lip. Vil keeps his own from curling at the sight of the dry and torn skin there.

“Alright.” The villainess says. “How does this work?”

Vil straightens. It wouldn’t do to show his triumph at this juncture.

“If you start halfway down the page, I will respond. Make me aware if I deviate from what’s on the page in any fashion.”

The villainess nods, clearing her throat. “He-hem. You wished to see me, brother?”

Vil slips into the character as easily as buttoning a shirt. “My wishes are immaterial. But we need to talk.”

“What could be so important to waylay the young heir?” The villainess’ lip curls as she reads. “I hardly merit the attention, usually.”

“You know what I’m talking about.” He snaps, dignity and guardianship offended. “Your behavior is completely inexcusable.”

The villainess balks, her tone hardening from mockery. “My behavior? I do believe I need clarification, brother. I have done nothing to dishonor our family—”

“If that’s what you think, then you’re even blinder than I imagined.” His fury is ice, solidified through years of abnegation and honor. “Your conduct towards our sister has been abominable. Either you correct it, or I shall correct you.”

“C-correct?!” The villainess stutters, unsightly for a scene partner. Vil will need to recommend someone else for the final production. “I have done nothing to—”

“For once we agree.” Righteousness straightens his spine, quickens his stride. “You have done nothing to make her feel welcome or as if she belongs. Ignoring her at school? Making snide remarks to tear down her confidence? Who do you think you are, to commit these acts with such audacity? It seems you’ve forgotten who has the natural right to live in this household, and who is here merely due to Father’s generosity and goodwill.”

“I—”

“I don’t want to hear your excuses.” He scolds the unsightly cuckoo before him. “I am telling you what will happen. You will be civil towards our sister. You will be polite to her. And you will still your sharp tongue every time it decides it wants to say something unkind. If that means you never speak again outside the necessities, then so be it.”

“Wait, please wait, please, stop—”

And now going off script? Will blunders never cease? Vil continues the monologue as best he can in the face of such unprofessionalism.

“And if you disregard my words—if you fail my instructions in any way? Well.”

He tilts his head, channeling Gracey Enji in every pore of his being. “What will happen to you will make the punishment you received for ruining Asahiko’s high school debut feel like the gentlest kindness by comparison.”

And the villainess—

The Prefect flinches, curling in on themself as if in anticipation of a blow.

Their eyes are staring down, unseeing, as their mouth babbles, clearly not even trying to stay on script any more.

“No, no, I’m sorry, I won’t, I, I didn’t—!”

But somehow still reciting exactly what’s written on the page despite that.

There are two ways to read these lines, Vil is suddenly realizing.

One is as a hero decisively warning a scheming villainess that his patience with her wiles has run dry and that there will be consequences for her actions.

And the other…

“The hell do you think you’re doing?!”

Potato #1 has moved into Vil’s space, shoulders tensed like the first year was about to lay hands on him if not for Rook’s intercession. His vice-warden’s grip strength clearly has taken the potato by surprise, uniform wrinkling as he attempts to yank himself free.

Potato #2 is hovering around the Prefect, the monster whining and tearing holes in their too-long trousers. “Prefect, are you okay? Do, do you need something, a, ah, some water maybe? Hey, hey, Prefect, Yuu, look at me, please?”

“Ooh-kaaay!” Diamond pops up between Vil and his underclassmen, perfectly fake smile not quite as magicam-ready as it usually is. “Not that this hasn’t been su~uper interesting, you’re a master of your craft Vil-san, really, but y’know we’ve gotta lot of work to do with this investigation thing, hate to see the dorm head if he thought we were playing around, you know how it is, right~? C’mon guys, we’d better get moving, this is an important date and we can’t be late!”

Potato #2 nods at Diamond, an arm tight around the Prefect’s trembling shoulders as he pulls them away, still murmuring low platitudes. Potato #1 is still glaring daggers at Vil even as he shrugs out of Rook’s grip. He picks up the copy of the script on the ground—when had it fallen?— and shoves it at his vice dorm head.

“Next time someone tells you they wanna stop,” He spits. “Maybe listen instead of just doin’ what you please. Freaking tyrant.”

The insult stings, but Vil controls himself as Potato #1 scoops up the whining monster and strides after the rest of the motley little group.

He can still hear the panicky, shuddering hitches in the Prefect’s breathing, after all.

“Roi du Poison?” He blinks back into himself to see Rook peering at him in concern. “Vil? Are you all right?”

“F-fine, I’m fine.” He turns sharply on his heel. “Come, Rook. It’d be best to return to the dorm for now. Epel may be attempting to shirk his etiquette lessons again.”

“…Oui, Roi du Poison.”

He doesn’t say another word the entire walk back to the Mirror Chamber, which Vil finds deeply irritating as it means his thoughts keep circling back to the other interpretation that dawned on him for this role.

But it’s ridiculous, he assures himself as they emerge outside of Pomefiore. Just a combination of his previous experience and some, some personal issues the Prefect clearly has that have mixed poorly in his mind. Gracey Enji is the male lead. Vil’s chance to play the hero, for once in his career. There’s no way that Bella DeNiâmerée intended for the character to come across in any other fashion than the style in which Vil has been playing him. No chance in the slightest.

Certainly not as a high school senior threatening a child five years his junior in a way that they cannot defend themselves from.

#twisted wonderland #twst #idia shroud #twst idia #vil schoenheit #twst vil #twst yuu #twisted wonderland yuu #villainous paranoiac yuu #twst ortho #ortho shroud #cater diamond #ace trappola #deuce spade #twst grim #gracey enji #vil & idia in reverse isekai land #part 2 electric boogaloo

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miloscat · 2 months ago

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[Review] Aperture Desk Job (PC)

Talking and fun, testing and fun.

I realised after three weeks of owning a Steam Deck that I should try this free tech demo that Valve made specifically to demonstrate the capabilities of the Steam Deck. So, I did. It's a half-hour little adventure set in the Portal universe, specifically the old days of Aperture when Cave Johnson was running the place.

The whole thing plays out with a fixed perspective as you sit at your "desk" which happens to have all the same buttons and features as a Steam Deck. Grady, a robot on a stick, talks you through the process with a lot of shenanigans along the way. You start by testing toilets, but a mishap results in the invention of the toilet-based gun turret which leads to some brief shooting sections and things escalate from there until a fateful meeting with Cave himself (in the form of a giant head) caps off the experience.

Without much in the way of challenging gameplay, it's a very directed experience where the writing and gags take centre stage, making it a comedy game of sorts. Unsurprisingly it's very much in the Portal 2 school of humour, and there's plenty of ways for the characters to say similar instructions if you dawdle. The silly turns and asides are amusing, including a civilisation of mantises living in the walls, wanton destruction of Aperture assets leading to imprisonment, and a rivalry with the homewares department. JK Simmons is excellent as always in the role of the kooky CEO, while breakout comedian Nate Bargatze holds his own as Grady, your constant companion.

I suppose I should say something about the Steam Deck itself. The construction is high quality, and the screen is large and bright. The touch panels work quite well when required to simulate a mouse, and otherwise the touch screen serves the purpose. The button layout suits my hand size well at least, although L1/R1 are perhaps the hardest to reach aside from the bonus 3 and 4 buttons which are just nice for when a game requires a remapped keyboard press every now and then (the options for remapping are clear and useful). Although it's large, it's relatively light and comfortable to hold, and the interface is nice and snappy. My main problems with the software have been when I have needed to venture into desktop mode and then got confused, or the system got locked up when switching over. But I appreciate that there's lots you can do outside of the main Steam mode, like installing Linux games or emulators; this has quickly become my go-to device for retro games!

Anyway, I don't know if this is even playable without a Steam Deck, but it's a fun little slice of the Portal universe that's free to download. If it is locked to the hardware that would be a shame, but it certainly wouldn't be alone with the multiple bits of Portal and Half-Life content that are locked to VR headsets or motion controllers. Valve and their experiments eh?

#aperture desk job #portal #valve #steam deck #review

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indigitalembrace · 1 year ago

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[They blinked once. Twice. He can do that...?]

[Of course he can do that, the fucker is pure code...!]

[ENCRYPTED REPLY]

So this is your true nature, eh? All I said was I wasn't going to help you anymore, and you've resorted to this.

[Before Black Heart could get lost in this new conundrum, an idea popped into their head.]

But, if we're threatening lives...Shrimp made an antivirus software. Brought it to life using your RRA tech before they went MIA. I'm sure it'd be more than willing to help you learn what it's like to be ripped to shreds, seeing as you're a threat to its creator's best friend. All it needs is a digital trace, and these messages are it.

-🖤

[ENCRYPTED MESSAGE] Hy, ywn qrg krg. Mvrm khqgu tte tzr. Wk vrn'b zsk mf mm asix. Z au gck xmev hb phlr vxhnhik igmdhie. Jnh, phl jclh xh rhmtr… sxkrir av, miy bh yzec mm… B ulxjs Q lvfncd rngk wvlmms kazs wer IKR pzhuitd I'dx pvxe kmxdzgx wqmv dx. Z wil ufbeg bh xllk gqos zm ko ghi rl r tptbb rfu, jnh… fa nete. W'd llrm gcshuy ebzc fzsa t zzmklm lsr teeuhbv.

#new_beginnings.exe #🖤 {black heart}#-... . - .-. .- -.-- . .-. .-.-.- / -... .- -.-. -.- ... - .- -... -... . .-. .-.-.- / - .-. .- .. - --- .-.

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llycaons · 2 years ago

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jc would be good at. hold on I'll google it

Software developer...I've seen that

Animal trainer/care worker/breeder....huh I can actually see that. getting mad at an animal makes no sense and maybe that'll keep him from blowing up. also he does love dogs

Data analysis...accountant...lab tech...eh sounds boring. he'd want something more glamorous

mental health counselor L M A O. maybe if it encourages reflection

there's some others listed but I can't really see him going for anything too pedestrian. the best options for him I think are

1. something to do with animals, like a prestigious dog breeder or judge or something.

2. event planner babey. also very stressful and involves interacting with people but I actually think he could be good at it and his attitude might even help

3. data analysis sounds boring but my asshole cousin is one and he makes crazy amounts of money so honestly it would probably fit the bill for being both really well-paid and not requiring much interpersonal interaction

#it's taking a long time to read this fic this go around bc I know the mystery already. first time I was like GO GO GO #ficblogging

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proxykiwi · 2 years ago

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so i'm about to go on an art history bender again. due to some amazing Gotlandic church art. And while the longer essays about Mary lying in bed and GRAPES are sure to come, i'm currently chewing on a question of THEORY that I want to spit out into the void:

(art historical ramblings under the cut)

So, like, Panofsky famously outlined how the forms of iconography can be traced through history and how those forms were, at some point at least, culturally significant. Taking off a hat to greet someone as an old remnant of knights putting up their visor to show their faces, something something. And then Baxendall sorta expands on that by drawing all kinds of links between visual expressions in Italian art and contemporary life - Italian Renaissance fascination with depicting 3D volumes and merchants gauging barrels. Eh.

Fast-forward to today, what are enduring iconographies? Things that we just Do That Way because at one point, some poor graphic designer had to come up with a Solution to a Visual Problem and now it's forever (/derogatory) Visual Canon?

The Save Button!

(is one example at least)

We Old People like to point out the joke of how the save button is a floppy drive, which no one under the age of say, 25, has any memory handling, but which we all recognise as "ah, that's for saving shit". And when some hapless graphic designer in The Olden Days (probably someone at Apple) had to come up with a easily recognisable symbol for 'save work', the floppy disk was the most logical object to use! Because it was, in use. Daily.

An art historian in the future looking at our current software might make the erronous deduction that the floppy disk - the object - was still in regular use in 2023. Of course, it's not, tech has moved on, but we still carry the image around with us because everyone Know That's How It's Supposed To Look Like. And I imagine it will be around for some while hereafter.

But you might see the shape of what I'm getting at here.

When we, art historians of the future, look at artworks of the past, CAN we actually deduct anything about the daily lives of people in the time is was made? Or can we only infer that at SOME point before the production of that visual representation, there might have been a basis in reality for it? (Does there always have to be a basis in reality for visual expressions? /side question) That perhaps only the first few years of seeing a certain motif pop up are significant markers of a given culture? But what if you don't know whether the artworks you're studying are "the first" (the absence of evidence is not the same as the evidence of absence).

And more interestingly, can there be some sort of rule of thumb for how long motifs endure? Do humans have a natural time span for "well this is how we always did it"? What influences that? Will we stop using the floppy disk for the save icon when a new generation of graphic designers comes around, having never seen a real floppy disk, and decide that perpetuating that icon is dumb? Or will it survive the last people who know what a floppy disk looks like, until it's such ancient history (and technology has moved so far beyond the need for this icon) that it just slowly fades out of use.

Whew. I'll go do some digging in the literature in the coming days, see if anyone has worked this one out yet because I'm SURE these aren't novel ideas. And I'll come back for Mary in a bed and GRAPES, of course.

#art history #musings #this post is mostly for my own benefit bc i suck at note taking #and i want to remember that i need to dig into this #can you tell i love iconography?#to be continued

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hexathe6 · 4 months ago

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aethersea: #lol yeah though #my dad hates the chinese government bc of all the atrocities (valid) #but I can't take it seriously when he's like 'and the chinese government is harvesting everyone's data from tiktok!' #like yeah ok they probably are #he says the government can just Tell a chinese company to hand over their data and they gotta and like. yeah ok sure I believe him #but the thing is #any american company that has my data may or may not be handing it over for free to the american government #but they're sure as shit selling it to anyone who'll buy #the highest bidder and every single bidder after that too bc you can just keep selling that data forever! #'foreign governments are spying on you' skill issue frankly I am not worth their time #I am just some rando #my own government is spying on me far more invasively #and google is spying on me so invasively it counts as porn in the matrix #and – the actual important point – foreign governments aren't going to do anything to me #the odds of that data being used against me by my own government are so much higher #so really truly from the bottom of my heart why the fuck should I care about the chinese government spying on me #that's not my problem that's the CIA's problem. let them stress about it #it is fundamentally not! my! problem!

mellueminate: #same rules as parents eh it's all abt control

the-isopodcalypse: #they're acting like china couldn't just buy my data if they wanted it lol

thoughtsformtheuniverse: #right? china has my information - big whoop. i'm out of their jurisdiction! #you know who has my information and can actually effect my quality of life? my government! any silicon valley dickhead! it's Infuriating

slimesaurian: don't forget! facial recognition software and location tracking and all sorts of military/police (see: military) tech that is used with our data to actively oppress us! it's not just the corporations that love our data, it's the enforcers of that wealth as well!

Infinitely funny whenever the media or government or some corporation tries to fearmonger to me about the Chinese government getting access to my private information.

Y'all have spent the last two decades drilling into me that I should have absolutely no expectation of privacy. No expectation of privacy from my own government, who are by far the entity most likely to use my information to really harm me. No expectation of privacy from advertisers who will do anything with that data, give it to anyone, if they think it will make them a few cents of profit. No expectation that anything I write, even in private documents that are never posted, won't be used to train machine learning models to let capital owners eliminate more workers and further consolidate their wealth and power. All that's just how it is and I have to accept it.

But apparently, unbeknownst to me, there is exactly one entity that does owe me an expectation of privacy, and it's not one that has any formal social or legal tie to me. Fascinating. I guess I have a lot to learn about privacy.

#multiprev

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techehs · 1 year ago

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Digital Learning

TECH EHS Solutions offers comprehensive E-learning solutions tailored to meet the diverse needs of industries. Our initiatives include

Building a repository of E-learning training modules for cost-effective access to premium programs.

Crafting engaging and visually appealing, highly interactive training modules.

Facilitating multilingual delivery options on both international and national scales.

Additionally, we specialize in industry-specific training programs and provide accredited courses for individuals seeking career advancement in EH&S. Our customizable solutions, including perpetual licenses for corporate entities, ensure seamless integration with organizational needs.

Moreover, we collaborate with a network of resellers, consultants, training companies, institutions, and academies to deliver globally recognized training programs.

#tech ehs software #tech ehs solution #e-learning

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industrystudyreport · 25 days ago

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U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market: Key Software Solutions for Compliance

U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market Growth & Trends

The U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market was estimated at USD 16.08 billion in 2023 and is projected to expand at a Compound Annual Growth Rate (CAGR) of 6.3% from 2024 to 2030. The U.S. commanded a significant 32.6% share of the global environment health & safety market. This growth trajectory is primarily driven by the stringent EHS standards imposed on companies, which necessitate substantial investment in EHS practices to avoid significant fines and penalties associated with non-compliance.

Regulatory Landscape and Key Players

Government agencies, including the U.S. Environmental Protection Agency (EPA), Occupational Safety and Health Administration (OSHA), and the U.S. Department of Labor, are responsible for establishing EHS norms and regulations. Companies like Trane Technologies exemplify a commitment to a safety-focused culture, striving for zero accidents and injuries across their organization.

Major market participants in the U.S. include Jacobs; AECOM; Enablon; Tetra Tech, Inc.; and VelocityEHS. These companies offer a broad spectrum of EHS software and services, encompassing ergonomics, engineering and construction, risk assessment, EHS software solutions, and management consulting and compliance.

Impact of Regulations and Public Awareness

Regulations play a pivotal role in shaping the U.S. environmental health & safety market. Government authorities such as OSHA, the EPA, and the Department of Justice (DOJ) mandate that organizations adhere to specific workforce safety and environmental regulations and standards, including the Toxics Release Inventory (TRI). These rigorous norms are anticipated to propel industry growth. Furthermore, rising public awareness regarding environmental issues has led to the development of environmental protection laws, which are expected to further drive market expansion. The high scrutiny and stringent regulations exert economic pressure on organizations to optimize their business processes and make them environmentally friendly. Consequently, management teams are compelled to deploy EHS software solutions in the workplace to reduce the occurrence of incidents.

Demand for EHS Services and Technological Integration

The escalating concern about the environmental footprint of business operations has significantly spurred demand for EHS services. Moreover, the advent and adoption of sophisticated EHS software solutions have streamlined the monitoring and management of EHS practices. Notably, 84% of companies utilizing EHS software have reported an ability to identify and fix potential safety issues before they occur. Beyond regulatory compliance, societal expectations for sustainable business operations have also fueled the EHS market's expansion. Growing consumer consciousness about companies' environmental practices often translates into greater support for those prioritizing EHS.

Curious about the U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market? Download your FREE sample copy now and get a sneak peek into the latest insights and trends.

U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market Report Highlights

Chemicals & petrochemicals segment dominated the U.S. market share in 2023. It is also expected to be the fastest growing from 2024 to 2030.

The software product segment, while currently smaller in size, is projected to be the fastest-growing segment in the U.S. EHS market. It is expected to register a significant CAGR from 2024 to 2030.

The on-premises deployment type dominated the U.S. market in 2023. This dominance can be attributed to the control, security, and customization that on-premises solutions offer.

U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market Segmentation

Grand View Research has segmented the U.S. Environment Health and Safety market based on product, deployment mode, end-use:

U.S. Environment Health & Safety Market Product Outlook (Revenue, USD Billion, 2018 - 2030)

Software

Services

Analytics

Project Deployment & Implementation

Business Consulting & Advisory

Audit, Assessment, & Regulatory Compliance

Certification

Others

U.S. Environment Health & Safety Market Deployment Mode Outlook (Revenue, USD Billion, 2018 - 2030)

Cloud

On-Premises

U.S. Environment Health & Safety Market End-use Outlook (Revenue, USD Billion, 2018 - 2030)

Chemicals & petrochemicals

Energy & Mining

Healthcare

Telecom & IT

Construction

General Manufacturing

Others

Download your FREE sample PDF copy of the U.S. Environment Health and Safety Market today and explore key data and trends.

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britishassistant · 1 year ago

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The Villainous Paranoiac Sues For Character Defamation (1.5)

“Nii-san?!”

The lump in Idia Shroud’s bed lets out a pitiful groan.

“Nii-san, are you alright?! Are you hungry?! Sick?!” Ortho demands. “Hold on, I’ll do a scan to see what’s wrong!”

A pale, long fingered hand emerges from beneath the covers. It points languidly.

“…sekai…”

“Eh?” The android crowds closer to the bed. “What is it Nii-san? Your computer? Did something bad happen in one of your games? To Precipice Morai? Did an anime get cancelled?”

“…Isekai…”

“Isekai?” The android asks, confused. “Nii-san, what—?”

“I CAN’T ACCEPT THAT A REAL LIFE ISEKAI WOULD COME FROM SUCH A LAME LIGHT NOVEL!!”

It’s with this impassioned cry that Idia Shroud throws off his duvet, hair flaring wildly.

Idia jabs an accusatory finger at his computer screen, where the illustration and photo are posed side by side. “Apparently, not if they hijack Night Raven’s carriages to get here!”

Ortho’s optic sensors dilate and contract as his facial recognition software runs.

“But Nii-san—!”

Ortho’s synthetic brow furrows. “I guess…”

“Eh? Well, uh.” Idia’s attention fights with the gacha he’s just opened, but ultimately surrenders to the colorful world within. “Only if it’s a low priority thing, okay?”

“Roger!”

#twisted wonderland #twst #idia shroud #twisted wonderland idia #twst idia #ortho shroud #twst ortho #twisted wonderland ortho #twst yuu #villainous paranoiac yuu #suing for character defamation #isekai #reverse isekai #kind of?

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rtechca · 8 months ago

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Offshore Development Company in Calgary: Where Code Meets Cowboy Hats! 🤠💻

Calgary. A city famous for its cowboys, towering mountains, and now—offshore development companies? Yep, you heard that right! Calgary is stepping into the tech spotlight, where oil rigs and code bugs coexist, and where developers can wrangle more than just cattle. So, if you’re on the lookout for an offshore development company that brings a little Western charm to your next project, saddle up and let’s talk tech!

Calgary: Where the Code Runs Wild 🐎

Forget the Wild West, welcome to the Wired West. Calgary’s developers are just as comfortable in their cowboy boots as they are in their cozy coding socks. When you partner with an offshore development company here, you’re not just getting another team of developers—you’re getting digital rodeo champs! They’ll lasso your project, rope in all the details, and gallop across deadlines like they’re racing in the Calgary Stampede.

Time Zones? No Problem, Partner! ⏰

Worried about time zone differences? Don’t sweat it. While you’re sleeping soundly, your Calgary team is hard at work wrangling the toughest code bugs, making sure your software stays smooth as a freshly paved prairie highway. And when you’re awake, well, Calgary’s developers are usually up too. Their time zone isn’t so far off from most North American businesses, making collaboration easier than finding a Tim Hortons in Alberta.

Tech Skills Stronger Than a Chinook Wind 💨

What do offshore web developers in Calgary bring to the table? More than just maple syrup, that’s for sure. These teams are tech-savvy, adaptable, and ready to tackle any project you throw their way. Whether you need custom eCommerce solutions software, mobile apps, or web development, Calgary’s devs know their stuff. Plus, they come with that famous Canadian politeness—you won’t just get a working product, but probably an apology for any delay, even if there wasn’t one!

Save Some Bucks, Eh? 💵

While Calgary’s developers may not offer the same rock-bottom prices as overseas teams, they do offer incredible value. You’re getting top-tier North American talent without the sky-high price tag. And let’s be real, what’s better than having an offshore team that’s just a phone call away without needing to bust out a translator or figure out international dialing codes? So, if you’re looking for an offshore development company with a Canadian twist, Calgary’s got your back. With developers that can code like pros and handle any digital cattle drive, it’s time to rope in the talent from the heart of Alberta.

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viact1 · 8 months ago

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The Future of EHS in Construction: Trends to Watch in 2024

The construction industry has always changed very fast as it considers an evolution of new technologies and redesigning of regulatory requirements reshaping environmental health and safety practices. Moving into 2024, EHS Solutions for Construction will be pushed to become even more technically sophisticated by some fast-paced innovations in AI, data analytics, and cloud-based platforms. Here's a look at some key trends to watch for in 2024 that will change the future of EHS in the construction industry.

1. AI-Powered Video Analytics for Real-Time Safety Monitoring

AI is going to change safety standards in construction. By 2024, it will represent a massive video analytics push-the AI-powered. Construction companies are increasingly involving AI in monitoring sites in real time. Pointing out key safety concerns such as slips, falls, trips, dangerous zone intrusions, etc are now possible through AI. For example, such solutions as viAct Construction Safety Software track worker behavior using AI-based video analytics, detect the lack of personal protective equipment and send real-time risk alerts to the supervisor.

While minimizing workplace accidents, these EHS solutions for construction also help optimize productivity through the automation of monitoring for safety and the reduction of much manual oversight. Scalable and cost-effective AI-based systems make such solutions basic tools that must be used by project managers and EHS officers in the coming year 2024.

2. Edge Computing and Cloud Integration for EHS Solutions

The confluence of cloud integration and edge computing is ready to redefine how construction companies deal with and store EHS data. Solutions such as viAct offer cloud, on-premise, or hybrid deployment modes, giving room for flexibility in how companies want to use data and protect it under industry regulations, such as the GDPR. With real-time data collection integrated into construction sites and cloud processing, extensive safety insights can be derived much quicker.

With construction EHS solutions further becoming increasingly cross-platform-integrated, a firm can consolidate data from various sources such as cameras, AI modules, and mobile applications while protecting infrastructure security with advanced encryption to make the whole safety monitoring process more efficient and transparent.

3. Proactive Environmental Monitoring and Compliance

Of all, the construction industry remains in the limelight for cutting carbon footprints and abiding by environmental standards. In 2024, environment, health, and safety solutions for construction would go beyond merely safety and surveillance to be carried out within the environment itself. Real-time monitoring systems for construction sites would track leaks of toxic gases, waste water, handling waste, and illegal dumping in a viAct Environmental Monitoring Module.

As governments move to introduce tougher environmental regulations, automated monitoring systems are going to be the key to compliance monitoring.

4. Data-driven EHS Solutions for Better Decision-Making

Now with the help of AI and potential data analytics, companies can generate massive safety data aimed at spotting trends and predicting risks early For example, throughout Safety Software Dashboard, a called viHUB, gets a bird’s eye view of on-site security with real-time reporting, automated employee counting and tracking tools.

The use of data-driven insights is helping companies be more transparent through the job site while responding quickly to emergent risks. The change in safety management towards a more data-centric approach will yield huge reductions in accidents and provide an edge in competitiveness in the construction sector to deliver projects within the estimated time frame and budget.

5. Wearable Tech and IoT in Construction EHS

The wearables and IoT integration with EHS are some of the emerging trends for 2024. Wearables, in this manner, will be able to measure the vital signs of workers, monitor the movement of workers, and detect the presence of toxic materials to which the workers are exposed. A combination collaboration with EHS construction solutions can take responsibility for ensuring real-time data about the health and well-being of workers, preventing overexertion, and safety compliance in terms of applied safety protocols.

Conclusion

It is truly radiant that the solution for EHS in construction has an optimistic outlook and ties up with the most leading-edge technologies such as AI, cloud computing, and IoT. Construction companies embracing these innovations will be able to enhance worker safety while reducing accident rates; and generate increased productivity and compliance with environmental regulations. For instance, viAct's Construction Safety Software will enable safe sites, a streamlined workflow, and high transparency with minimal costs. Construction companies will be in the best position to handle the job-site challenges of tomorrow by being ahead of these trends.

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How Generative AI Can Help in Ensuring Safety in the Oil & Gas Industry? What are the Key Features of Safety Inspection Software Ideal for Saudi Arabia?

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zov911 · 11 months ago

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Navigating the Digital Landscape: Mastering Client Retention in the Canadian Construction Industry In a world gone digital, every industry, including construction, faces an incredible opportunity to leverage technology to enhance their practices. Aye, the digital revolution can be a double-edged sword. The same technology that simplifies procedures can result in difficulties in developing enduring relationships with clients. However, mastering client retention in the digital era, particularly for the Great White North’s construction industry, shouldn't be as knotty as untangling a string of hockey skates. Let's unpack this topic together, eh? Unprecedented technology has enabled operation efficiency, risk management, and portfolio diversification in the Canadian construction industry. However, these benefits underscore a need for improved client retention strategies to maintain and cultivate relationships, critical for long-term business sustainability. Just as Marie-Philip Poulin's double overtime goal sealed victory in the recent Olympics, successful client retention can secure your company’s future. And, much like the intricate play strategies in a three-on-three hockey game, digital client retention in the construction space requires a well-thought-out approach, real teamwork, and excellent execution. Building Trust in the Digital Era A key to client retention in any industry is trust. In construction, trust shows up in safe structures, on-time delivery, and transparent communication. However, in the digital era, where online communications and remote meetings are the moose of the hour, maintaining this trust can be challenging. A concerted effort is pivotal in creating digital trust. This includes adopting high-quality video conferencing software, reliable project management tools, and comprehensive data security measures. By demonstrating your company’s technological competence, you prove to your clients that you can weather the digital shift without compromising on professional deliverance or security. Personalising the Digital Experience Modern Canadian customers expect tailored experiences. The advent of Customer Relationship Management (CRM) tools and data analytics allows construction companies to personalise client experiences like never before. Understanding customer preferences, requirements, and pain points through data insights is now as easy as spelling "Saskatchewan.” This degree of personalisation aids in building a rapport with clients, fostering long-term business alliances. Emphasising Customer Loyalty Much like the unabated loyalties Canadians have for their home NHL teams, construction clients should have a sense of allegiance towards their chosen construction company. Digitally-enabled loyalty programs can incentivise repeat business, contributing to increased client retention rates. In conclusion, while navigating the digital landscape may seem as daunting as a black bear looming in your campsite, it can prove to be an invaluable instrument in mastering customer retention in the Canadian construction industry. So, pop your toque on, lace up those tech-smart boots, and tap into the endless power of digital resources to balance customer acquisition and retention. Remember, every client retained is a testament to your company’s digital resilience and your understanding of the unique Canadian commercial landscape. Case Study: Building Up Success with Digital Strategies in Maple Structures Maple Structures, a notable Canadian construction company, has established itself as an industry leader, not just due to the quality of its work, but also for its compelling client retention strategy built upon digitization. The company realized early on that to stay competitive and successful, it required more than just an excellent architectural blueprint. It needed a solid digital blueprint. A Blank Slate In 2016, Maple Structures was struggling. It was not for lack of appropriate workforce or unsatisfactory

customer service but, quite simply, clients and prospects found it difficult to stay connected due to the company's outdated business practices. This created problems in retaining its client base. Something had to change. Digital Transition Maple Structures decided to embrace digital transformation to change the way they communicated with their clients and streamlined internal operations. The plan encompassed client-focused elements, such as online client portals, real-time project updates, and a digital platform for queries or suggestions. They also integrated cloud technology for efficient data management and leveraged data analysis for strategic planning. Measurable Successes The transition reaped several immediate and significant rewards. Client retention saw a steady increase, from a spotty 65% up to an impressive 90% within a year. Their newfound agility led to reduced project wastage and completion times, providing them with a clear competitive edge in the crowded market. Key Takeaways Embrace digital technology: Moving away from traditional methods and embracing digital platforms enable smoother, more transparent client interactions. Leverage online client portals, project management tools, and real-time project updates to keep clients engaged and convey your commitment to their projects. Incorporate Data Analysis: Data analytics can offer valuable insights on project efficiency, client preferences, and areas that need improvement, facilitating effective project strategies. Invest in Cloud-Based Solutions: Cloud-based technologies simplify data management, leading to smoother project execution and collaboration. Ensure Regular Client Communication: Regularly updating your clients about their project's progress builds trust and emphasizes your company's reliability. Digitization is not a mere buzzword. It is the key to sustained success in the industry. If companies like Maple Structures want to continue enjoying high client retention, they must not just adopt, but master this digital landscape. Following the outlined steps can help other companies similarly enhance their own client retention strategies. "Ready to Master Client Retention in the Canadian Construction Industry? Discover the secrets to success in our digital landscape now! Don't get left behind, join the leaders today!" Start Your Digital Transformation Now! "The Canadian construction industry is changing its face with digitalization. As per McKinsey, an approximate of $1.6 trillion of value could be created by the construction industry using digital strategies. Building firms that leverage online customer retention strategies can tap into this value, thereby offering a significant competitive edge."

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