#thank you Abby for this meta

[matan4il]

Okay, first of... I adore you and your metas and just ❤️❤️❤️

But also, two things. I'm re-watching and I realised that, even though Eddie knows as early as s2e01 that Buck was left by his gf, he somehow never knew Abby was a 911 dispatcher? At least according to a scene in Powerless. I mean... the Abby topic might be a sore one but surely, they would have had at least one convo about her. And a big part of who she was and how she came into Buck's life is her being a dispatcher.

Which leads me to the conversation Buck and Abby have at the end of What's Next? and how Abby says that she was a person whose life revolved around other people's problems and that she had "no identity" other than the people she helped. And that she left to figure out who she was. Part of which was leaving Buck and never looking back.

Isn't that what Eddie is going through as well, figuring out who he is, i mean. How cute would it be if the end of his journey, of him finding his identity, would be to be with Buck.

Sorry for the weird, and possibly already discussed, braindump ❤️❤️❤️

Awwwww, Nonnie! Thank you SO MUCH for the lovely words and I hope you can feel just how big I’m hugging you right now!

Oh, the talk they have in the truck on the way to the hot air balloon call in 317. I always assumed that Buck has told Eddie all about Abby and how she hurt him (Eddie already knew the gist of it from Chim in 201, clearly heard even more details by 204, and then 318 makes it clear he knows everything hurtful about Abby and her r/s with Buck), I wouldn’t think he’d leave out her being a dispatcher. So based on that, I believe I wrote in the 317 back in the day that Buck probably didn’t wanna upset Eddie by bringing her up, so instead he just says, “I heard dispatch gets...” without specifying who at dispatch filled him in. Eddie at that moment has more than one option, since Buck has a sister who works there, through which he has also befriended at least one other dispatcher, Josh. Both are more current fixtures at the end of s3 in Buck’s life than Abby. So Eddie goes for the most likely option, Maddie. Buck denies, but he’s also very awkward about it. We don’t get a cut back to Eddie’s face after that, but I always assumed if we did, we’d see him serving one of his patented, “I know when you’re bullshitting me, husband, but I’m gonna let it slide until you’re ready to tell me. 'Coz we both know you will.” Basically, Buck doesn’t wanna bring up Abby, Eddie doesn’t wanna press, but that doesn’t mean Eddie doesn’t know Abby is one of the contenders for who said that stuff to Buck.

YEEES! The difference between Abby and Eddie as Buck’s potential soulmates is glaring with that one, isn’t it? ‘Coz Abby needed to find herself and she didn’t come back. We always knew Eddie would. But then she doesn’t come back because she eventually chooses to walk away from being a first responder, she feels drained by helping others and realizes she can’t continue to do it anymore. I wrote in the 318 meta post that Buck is the opposite of that, he IS that guy who WANTS to run into burning buildings to save others. And the thing is, so is Eddie. Ali chose to walk away from the first responders life, Abby did as well, but Eddie didn’t really want to. He felt compelled by what he heard from Chris. He was going through a lot, so he overreacted and quit instead of communicating with his son, but he never actually wanted to be away from saving others, which is why even before he’s resolved all of his issues, he goes to Bobby, wanting back in. Even when quitting, he still found a job that was firefighting-adjacent, one that allowed him to still help and save people, like we saw in 511. The things he has to figure out aren’t going to change this about who Eddie essentially is, on the contrary, they’ll only reinforce that this is who he is, a guy who cares a lot and wants to help others. Just like Buck. Which is precisely why yep, Eddie will ALWAYS choose to be with him. The way these two are so compatible, I AM WEEPING.

Thank you so much for the ask, Nonnie! And I’m so sorry if my own ramble is weird and unhinged, but they make me feel things. Have a great day! xoxox

(I got an influx of asks, I WILL answer all of them, but it might take a sec. If anyone wants to check whether I've already answered theirs or to read my replies, here's my ask tag. Thank you! xoxox)

[lover-of-mine]

https://www.tumblr.com/lover-of-mine/745334896398073856/i-know-i-completely-changed-my-original-spec-on-s7 please I want to hear this! I love hearing your metas and spec lol

Alexa, darling, I love that the original spec was also written on an ask from you, thank you for always supporting my ramblings 💜💜💜💜also @steadfastsaturnsrings, Saturn, darling, I do have more thoughts lol

Okay first, this one needs context, so other metas/speculations whose elements got me to think this one makes sense, I don't think you need to read them for this to make sense, but just in case you want to read something more in-depth about it, I do strongly recommend you read them thought, I think it makes this one more impactful: link to the original spec where all I had to go on was the voices in my head, like legit, we didn't even have a date for season 7 yet, this one is just in case you wanna see the original version of this, buddie is mirroring the couples in Buck, actually and the only situation they are missing is the couple that crashed into the tree aka both of them in danger/hurt at the same time, Buck needs to deal with death/figure out how to live as someone who wants to live, buddie is tied by death. 

Okay, so, when I first started thinking about this I was mostly thinking about Buck's relationship with water/breathing and that leading to a breakdown or leading to buddie. Because Buck drowning could trigger him enough for him to have a full-blown breakdown, but a Buck who's already been through the process of realizing he wants to be alive almost dying again might give him an oh moment that would lead him to act on his feelings for Eddie. My hope was also for that to mirror elements of the shooting since I am a firm believer that the shooting was Eddie's oh moment. But I was writing that with no clue about what they would do with the season, so now that we have more information, I need to tweak things a bit. 

Buck has a very intricate relationship with breathing which also gives him an intricate relationship with water. The first call we see on the pilot is the 118 responding to a kid who drowned, who Buck is doing cpr on, then we have the baby on the wall who's also not breathing, we have the girl getting strangled by her snake, and we have him saving Athena with water. On a less this is probably just a coincidence note, Buck's first real brush with death is on the date with Abby, where he chokes and Abby needs to perform an emergency tracheotomy on him, the surgery on his leg leads to blood clots in his lung, he gets caught on a tsunami, during the warehouse fire in Buck Begins he gives his mask to the victim and openly states he will hold his breath and the sprinklers also give it the water elements, and after the lightning, the thing that stops working is his lungs. This all led me to the belief that they will drown Buck at some point. Mostly because I wanted to mirror elements of the shooting and one of the elements of the shooting is that it brings up a previous trauma for Eddie. The easiest way to bring up previous trauma for Buck is to drown him, you hit breathing and water elements. Having him crash his car, be driven off the road, drive off a bridge, or something like that, into water is a situation that would be urgent enough that he can't wait for help. At first, I just put Eddie in the car because I wanted Eddie to be forced to save Buck, but now I have a reasoning for Eddie to be in the car. 

Let me back up and explain how getting there makes sense though. The promotion of the season has had a lot of talk about vulnerability, and Buck and Eddie leaning on each other, and they need to deal with death as a concept. Eddie needs to stop chasing Shannon, along with dealing with the grief over having to save Buck and Buck needs to deal with his passively suicidal behavior and with the way that following the coma dream, Buck actually does care if he dies, so he needs to get to a point where he acts as someone who wants to be alive and asks for the things he wants. Personally, I think the only way buddie will truly work as a couple is if they get to that point, because a Buck who asks for what he wants is not a Buck who will let Eddie get away with thinking he's always right, and Eddie needs to stop trying to fix what went wrong with Shannon and just do what he actually means. 

Eddie welcoming Buck to the world of the living in the locker room gave me hope on that front because Buck finding out he wants to be alive and also calling Eddie on his bullshit while they navigate a place where Buck can face death as something not scary can be good for both of them, especially with the way they keep talking about both Buck and Eddie just “wanting to be happy” because they could walk through the trauma, and Buck talking about death as boring and the focus the show put on Shannon on the past few episodes, showing Eddie and Chris visiting her grave, more detail on hers and Eddie's relationship, Chris’ conflict with her memory, you can have them learning the move forward together. Oliver also saying there will be a chance of things coming up in a not so great light but the friendship persevering can also mean that they will deal with other aspects of their relationship that could create problems in their relationship, like the way they assume they understand each other so they won't actually talk about things that matter and just assume the other will understand what they mean since they are very much in sync a lot of the time, like for instance the way Buck definitely misunderstood what Eddie actually meant with his will or the way Eddie reacted to Natalia and the whole I feel like she sees me. They also need to deal with the way they don't talk to each other about big changes in their lives, Eddie didn't talk to Buck about changing his will or leaving the 118, Buck didn't talk to Eddie about the sperm donation, and they need to. 

So let's say season 7 is the buddie utopia of my dreams where they address these base issues, something they need to talk about is how it felt to save each other's lives. But they haven't talked about it yet, and it's been long enough they would need another trigger. But this conversation is the conversation you pretty much can't write without ending it with a love confession of some form, but I'll come back to this. 

We need a trigger. I said up there about how they are mirroring the calls in Buck, Actually. There we have a crush injury involving a vehicle with Thomas and Mitchell, we have someone injured more worried about the other's safety who got injured by someone while at work with Ruth and Earl, we have Lola and See Me Norman talking her out of the ledge. Crush injury and focus with hand holding happens both ways, with the truck bombing and the bridge, one of the injured by more worried about the other we also have both ways, granted one is a lot more intense than the other, but during the shooting Eddie asks if Buck is hurt and when they get kidnapped, Buck gets pistol whipped but he spends the whole time more worried about Eddie than himself. And we watched Buck talk Eddie off a metaphorical ledge in dumb luck, if we're lucky, we can get a mirror of that going the other way this season.

Most of my hopes of this particular thing come with the way Buck and Eddie's individual storylines are parallel but slightly misaligned, you have the first love who left and came back without giving them real closure, you have Eddie having too much responsibility being put on him by his parents when Buck is invisible over the fact that he “failed” on the thing his parents' wanted from him, the lightning mirrors the well quite literally, they are in opposite sides of the frame, Buck is in the sky, Eddie is underground, Buck is the middle of a street, Eddie is the middle of nowhere, (here’s a set if you need help visualizing that), among other smaller things, like the way Buck’s first death on the job was someone falling to their death and for Eddie too.  

That leaves us with the newlyweds who crashed on their way back from the wedding, aka a situation where both of them get hurt, but one of them gets pinned, one of them gets the worst of it. 

So car crash. 

I go back and forth as to why they are in the car. I played with the idea of Taylor activating her emergency beacon and them actually going into that situation willingly, but considering everything about the show, you can do pretty much anything, they could witness a crash and then things go to hell, they could be driven off the road, they could fight in the car and lose control, I don't know, but the thing is, utopia buddie who are in a spot where the change from friends to more could work, maybe toeing the line more heavily (I mean, we are mirroring newlyweds lol), getting into a crash while off duty. It's very important that they are off duty because now we're mirroring elements of the shooting. 

Why we mirroring the shooting? Well, because the shooting is a banger. I'm kidding lol. There's something inherently romantic about the shooting, Buck wearing Eddie’s blood, the shared looks across the pavement, the focus on hands, Eddie literally bleeding out and asking if Buck’s hurt, Buck escalating from we got you to I got you, from just hang on to I need you to hang on. And there’s also my personal belief that Eddie is aware of his feelings and realized what they meant during the shooting, so I want to put Buck in a situation where he can’t escape what his feelings about Eddie mean, because I think Buck never stopped to truly look at what Eddie is to him. And with where they are, to be put in a situation like that would force them both to confront these feelings, even if they don't feel like saying Eddie has been pining since season 4.

The shooting has quite a few elements that make it as intense as it is: they are not supposed to be there, it’s not their call and the 136 is the house responsible, it brings up a previous trauma for both of them, Eddie gets shot, bringing up things from his days in the army and Buck is forced to roll under the truck after being crushed by one, Buck does the saving alone because there’s no one else they trust around, it happens by chance because Eddie gets targeted just because, they are also done with what they went to do by the time Eddie gets shot. All of these can be achieved in many ways, the only thing I’m sure of is that they need to be in the car together and they need to be off-duty because if they are not off-duty you take away from the urgency of the situation, having tools and immediate rescue available waters the situation down. I don’t know why but I keep going back to them driving off a cliff into water, sometimes I shift to a bridge, but they used that with Judd and Grace in Lone Star so I don’t know if we would get a repeat, but basically I see them stopping to help someone, getting back to the car, and maybe the side of the road gives under them, or there’s another crash, that now is into them throwing them over, or they get driven off the road. There’s also the chance of them just losing control of car, a tire pops, it's raining, something runs across the road, and they get underwater. 

Why is them being underwater important? If they are just hanging on the side of the cliff, they can wait for help. Also, we are bringing up past trauma for both of them, if you put them in a car filling with water, you hit the water/breathing elements for Buck, but you also hit well elements for Eddie, and Shannon was also hit by a car. So their car gets thrown into water, going back to the Buck, Actually comparison, the crash, one of them gets pinned. The one who’s pinned needs to be Buck. Why? Eddie is the widower, Buck is the savior. Eddie has to live with the fact that he didn’t actually save the people he thought he did, and he has to live with the fact he was helpless watching Shannon die, and Buck exists to do the saving. So we are letting Buck be saved and Eddie know he actually did save him. It could be cathartic for both of them. 

And I want Eddie performing desperate CPR. Sue me. Can you imagine everything Ryan can give us there? Mouth to mouth, “you’re not doing this to me again”, being all wet and you can’t tell if the water on his face is from the water or his tears, begging Buck to wake up, Buck finally coughing wake and dropping back against Eddie, Eddie breathing as heavily as Buck as he hubs his back and encourages him to breathe while refusing to let go of him. If we’re lucky Eddie hiding his face in Buck’s hair or something like that. It could be so good. Because you can also have Buck looking at Eddie like he’s seeing him for the first time in a very clear revelation moment. You can have them looking at each other in a clear revelation moment. It could be THE oh moment.

And then they can talk. I said I would come back to this. Them having a conversation about saving each other, forces them to talk about what they mean to each other. You literally can’t have them talk about what it was like to save the other without forcing them to talk about how they love each other, and if they do the groundwork I mentioned, they can have one HELL of a getting-together scene. Imagine one them yelling “because I don’t want to live without you!” and the way it would be literally I don’t wanna be alive without you and I don’t want to continue living my life without you. And like, having Buck say something like this with the way he reacted to Thomas and Mitchell dying together and how he focused on them dying together, not the life they had, and the way Buck interpreted Eddie’s will as Eddie asking him to be okay with Eddie dying, Eddie asking him to outlive him, and have him look Eddie in the eye “I don’t ever want to do this without you” come oooooooooon, it would be such a beautiful conclusion to the buildup we have right now. 

But yeah, this is the madness. The ultimate wishful thinking. I could be so good.

Anyway, if you read this I love you 💜

[ink-the-axolotl-rabbit]

(Im totally not planning on drawing you something For Christmas as a gift)

What are you currently interested in as of right now

Alright, pulling out my hyperfixation list paired with my favorite characters from said hyperfixations:

Team fortress 2 - pyro, spy, sniper, scout, engineer, zhana (idk if I typed that right) and Mrs pauling

Vocaloid/fanloid - hatsune Miku, Kagamine Rin, megurine Luka, MEIKO, Gumi, Vflower, and Zatsune miku

Utau: Kasane teto and defoko/utane uta

FNAF - withered bonnie, elizabeth Afton, toy chica, mangle, lolbit, and Abby (FNAF movie)

Deltarune - noelle holiday, rouxls kaard, Susie, And Lancer

Undertale - Sans, papyrus, Alphys, napstablook, and frisk

The unused and majin show (I need more of it on my tumblr feed) - unused and majin (no surprise)

Yt shorts wars - riggy the rankey and royal melon (royal pear's clone)

Pokemon - Hypno and gardenvoir (don't make me spray you)

Creepypastas: sonic.exe, Mx Mario, Hypno's lullaby, and lost silver

Sonic the hedgehog - mecha sonic mk ll, metal sonic, rocket metal sonic, Amy rose, Cream and cheese, Rouge the bat, Shadow the hedgehog, sonic the hedgehog, and maria

Mario - princess Peach, princess daisy, rosalina, and those talking flowers in Mario wonder

Paper Mario - Dimentio, Count bleck, and that taking paint can

Pizza tower - noisette, the vigilante, and snotty

Pikmin - captain Olimar and the blue pikmin

Kirby - Marx, king dedede, and meta might

Thanks for coming to my Ted talk, and letting me casually show my hyperfixations :]

This is your fault anon /silly

[linuxgamenews]

Slay the Princess adventure is due to debut next month

Slay the Princess horror visual novel game has a release date for Linux, Steam Deck, Mac, and Windows PC. Thanks to Black Tabby Games for their amazing work and dedication. Due to make its way onto Steam and GOG. Slay the Princess is due to launch on Friday, October 20, 2023. Available on platforms like Linux, Mac, and Windows PC, and the Steam Deck. Plus, if you're already a fan of Black Tabby Games’ Scarlet Hollow, there will be a bundled discount. Offering a great deal for avid players. What's Slay the Princess all about? Well, step into a thrilling horror visual novel adventure where every choice matters. You start outside of a cabin, repeatedly. Each time you face a similar situation but with unexpected twists. You're handed a blade, with a choice to go into the cabin or simply walk away. Your main mission revolves around the princess, voiced by Nichole Goodnight. However, each time you encounter her, something seems... different. So it's up to you to piece together the mystery. Rest assured, it won’t be easy. Jonathan Sims, known from "The Magnus Archives," lends his voice to the elusive narrator. He also adds layers of suspense and intrigue, but it's clear he's not revealing everything. As a Slay the Princess player, you'll need to sift through the clues. Due to face the hauntingly beautiful hand penciled visuals crafted by Abby Howard. While you embark on a journey that will keep you sharp.

Slay the Princess Release Date Trailer

It's more than just a typical adventure, though. Slay the Princess offers multiple endings and paths, making every play unique. The story can warp and bend, depending on your choices. And here's where it gets good: the princess might not be who she appears to be. Is she a threat, or is she being framed? The story constantly keeps you guessing. While it's tempting to think of Slay the Princess as just a horror visual novel game. It also blends elements of comedy, unpredictability, and meta-storytelling. You're not just following a storyline; you're shaping it. It's an deep experience that challenges your understanding of storytelling. A few key points to remember:

The Slay the Princess artwork is one of a kind. Abby Howard's traditional pencil and paper style stands out and elevates the whole experience.

Expect the unexpected. The story might feel like it's looping, but each iteration brings new challenges.

Don’t get too attached or trust anyone too quickly, especially not the princess.

One word of caution: while it might sound fun to romance the princess, it's probably not the best idea. You can try out the Demo available on Steam and GOG. In essence, Slay the Princess promises an experience that's both challenging and entertaining. It's designed to be more than just a simple play through. It invites players to think, decide, and live with the outcomes of their actions. The release date also includes support for Linux, Steam Deck, Mac, and Windows PC. Due to make its way onto Steam and GOG, October 20th. Priced at $17.99 USD / 14.99 GBP / 17.99 EUR with a 10% launch discount. And a bundled discount with the Early Access title Scarlet Hollow.

[probablygayattorneys]

So, according to my text log, today marks my third Ace Attorney-versary (well, of rediscovering it, unfortunately we'll never know exactly when I originally got into it). Hard to believe that in just three years, I've played 22 puzzle games (and am in the middle of two more), made friends, got back into sharing my writing and have posted 31 fanfics for a total of 326818 words publicly (and that's not even counting my trio of secret fics that I published anonymously, or the ones I'm still working on), made a semi-successful blog dedicated to puzzle games of the early aughts (I'm sitting at about 400 followers, which is not nothing!), moved (twice!), watched my nuclear family start to fall apart (my mom’s receipt for the divorce lawyer’s retainer is on the fridge, being held up by a magnet of the attorney’s badge), even gotten a tattoo (and am in the processing of working with someone to design a second one), and got semi-engaged and my temporary engagement ring (unfortunately my man has the AUDACITY to live on the other side of the country so I have a different ring than the one he'll actually propose with to signify that I am officially off the market) is even based on Wrightworth colors.

I'm not going to lie and pretend all of the games were incredible feats of the genre (they weren't) or that I've had the best time (in fact, the lowest lows of my mental health have been in the past three years), or that everyone I've met has been so wonderful and welcoming (you asshole anons and certain characters know who you are) but considering that I didn't plan any of this, I basically just stumbled into owning a switch and then @vaptainhammer, knowing that I used to love Ace Attorney, bought me the switch port of the originally trilogy and shoved me down the rabbit hole in the process, I'm grateful I had the experience. Here's to Phoenix, to the Laytons, to Ashley and Kyle, and to Vivian, Abby, Zieg, Ash, everyone else that Sissel dragged in, and of course, my love, my first and my last, my alpha and my omega, my number one puzzle assistant, my personal google, the one who started all of this is the first place and has stood by my side through all the ups and downs that life has thrown at me over the past three years, Blayne. I love you so much, forever, and I can't wait until we're able to bring the government into our relationship and I can start the rest of my life as your hersband, Mx. Vaptainhammer.

Can't promise I'll be helming this blog for another three years, but thank you to everyone who had climbed aboard at any point, and welcome to everyone who will, I hope you've enjoyed the thoughtless shitposts and the thoughtful and deeply cared about edits and meta posts, and are ready for more because I've got a full queue that grows every day. I may not go down with this ship but for everything else, I've had the time of my life fighting (the Defiant) dragons with you.

[marypsue]

hi mary! do you have any book recommendations for fans of the indian lake trilogy and/or horror books in general? i love your writing (followed way back for your gf fics lol) and would love to hear if theres anything in particular you'd recommend ^^

Oh hello hello hello! You've activated my trap card.

Honestly, I read less horror than I let on, and have started reading it more recently than not, so this may be a rather short list. But yeah I absolutely have some recommendations! If you enjoyed My Heart Is A Chainsaw (I really have to read the sequel) and you like my writing, I think our aesthetic and narrative sensibilities should be pretty similar, so hopefully these will be books you'll also enjoy.

First on the list and most obvious is of course My Best Friend's Exorcism, by Grady Hendrix. It's perfect companion reading for My Heart Is A Chainsaw, also being about two teenage girls navigating a difficult period in their friendship, complicated by the fact that something supernatural may or may not be trying to kill them and everyone around them, and may or may not, in fact, exist. Abby and Gretchen and their friendship are so wonderfully drawn, the absurd humour only underlines the helpless horror of their situation, and the climax made me bawl like a fucking infant. 11/10 no notes.

I'd also recommend We Sold Our Souls, also by Grady Hendrix, for some of the same and some slightly different reasons. If you were drawn in by Jade's girl-alone-against-the-world situation and her punky, horror-movie-obsessed alternative vibe, you'll like Kris Pulaski and her heavy metal quest to get her life and her music back. Another one that made me cry, and it's only getting more timely and relevant with every passing year.

I really liked Nick Medina's Sisters of the Lost Nation, about an older sister looking for her younger sister after the latter disappears from their reservation after a secret rendezvous at the recently-constructed casino. Anna and Jade share a certain 'nobody else is going to fix this, so it's up to me' sensibility, the way the author pulls together ancient mythology and modern horrors is well-crafted and spooky, and there's a deeply intentional queer thread running through this one from start to finish. Warning, though, this is a deeply, deeply sad book.

In terms of meta horror about horror, Riley Sager's Final Girls surprised me with how good and gripping it was. I picked it up expecting easy-reading paperback fluff, and got sucked right in. If you crossed over Halloween: H20 with Twin Peaks, you might get something like this book. I never see anybody talking about it anywhere ever and I have to strongly recommend it. (Unfortunately, it didn't focus as closely on the relationships between the 'final girls' as I wanted it to, but I still wasn't disappointed.)

Joe Hill's N0S48U kicked my ass and made me say 'thank you'. This one's pretty tragic, so maybe give it a miss if you don't want to read about bad things happening to characters you like, but, well, this is horror. Notable because the antagonist is Christmas-themed, and honestly, I've never seen anyone else so effectively harness the crawling feeling of Wrongness that seeing Christmas shit in July gives me.

And, going wayyyy back, one of the first horror novels I actually read all the way through (on the advice of a friend), Stephen King's The Girl Who Loved Tom Gordon. If you were a My Side Of The Mountain / Hatchet kind of kid, this is the book for you. And if for some obscure reason you haven't read Carrie yet, what are you waiting for.

I also read Paul Tremblay's The Pallbearers' Club, which somehow didn't quite manage to deliver on what I was hoping for, but which you might enjoy if you liked some of the other books on this list. If you like punk music and/or characters who like punk music, meta conceits, and New England folklore, give it a shot. (I think I knew a little too much about the subject matter going in for some of the big ~surprises~ to actually surprise me.)

I've also got on my TBR list Edgar Cantero's Meddling Kids, Stephen Graham Jones' The Only Good Indians, Jessica Johns' Bad Cree, and Riley Sager's The House Across The Lake and Survive the Night. I can't speak for any of them yet, though.

(And tossing a movie onto this list, you might really enjoy Netflix's The Final Girls. It's a lot fluffier than My Heart Is A Chainsaw, but for a fun meta slasher horror-mostly-comedy, it was a solid good time. With an ambush sequence that was pretty clearly inspired by Joel Schumacher's The Lost Boys!)

[krys-loves-otome]

OC Brain Rot Introductions

After making the first post with Thea and Abby, I realized that I didn't have an intro post introducing the character or to formally address what these kind of posts are going to be about (aside what I put in Thea and Abby's first post)

OC Brain Rot (based on this post here originally) are posts where I ramble off about my OCs and what they're up to currently outside of my writings and arts. In essence, these are brain dump posts. Sometimes they might be a couple of sentences and half-formed ideas, others might go into meta involving my ocs and whichever game they are a part of. Sometimes it might also include simple screaming, you just never know.

Brain rots will also NOT be spoiler-free! I'll usually note at the top of each post if there are going to be spoilers. Content and trigger warnings will also be noted in the beginning and in the tags where applicable.

OC Brain Rot is also open to questions towards and about the OCs themselves. They might even answer your questions themselves!

I've decided that, instead of having a separate tumblr blog (since I have like four of them at this current moment in time), I'll just make little posts about the ocs on main since I'm not especially active here as I'd like to be outside of queued posts and I have answered some questions in my OC's voices on this blog before (like this one from Houki giving her opinion on IkeSen's Masamune) and would like to get back into doing something like that.

Brain rots are also mostly going to involve my otome/dating sim OCs, but everyone is also welcome to ask about my original ocs and, if you're really curious, about older ocs that I've made for other fandoms outside of the otome/dating sim ones.

Below the cut, I've also put short intros for each of my ocs as quick reference for future brain rot posts. Longer, more detailed profiles will be made at a later date, but these will serve as little reminders for where this oc is coming from when I make future oc brain rot posts.

For other posts involving my OCs, here's my writing masterlist for them

Thanks for stopping by lovelies and hope to hear from you again soon!

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Houki of Jiyel, "Houki"

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Game: Ikemen Sengoku

Suitor: Mitsunari Ishida

Age: Early 20s

Physical Description: Short stature and chubby, large, bright green eyes, long straight black hair (that looks blue in certain lights), light to medium skin, wears round glasses

Personality: Quiet, Introverted, Observant

Brief History: A transplant MC from a different game, Houki was a noble lady sent on a diplomatic mission to strengthen ties between her home nation and six other kingdoms, mainly through the means of political marriage and alliances. Her plans were interrupted when she arrived in Sengoku era Japan and is now trying to find a way back to her home world to complete her original goal.

Misc. Fact: She loves reading more than anything in the world. It is her favorite pastime and is more often than not found reading some tome at almost any point in the day.

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Ophelia of Revaire, "Ophelia"

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Game: Ikemen Sengoku

Suitor: Kennyo

Age: Late 20s

Physical Description: Pale skin and hair (chin length and straight, parted to her right, our left), medium height, thin and willowy, dark red eyes, chin mole towards the right side (our left) of her face

Personality: Calculating, calm, refined

Brief History: Another transplant MC from a different game (same game as Houki), she was on the same diplomatic mission as Houki, but for different reasons. Born into a poor noble family, Ophelia has spent most of her life trying to bring up her family's position, was even briefly married for the cause, but thanks to her previous husband's passing, she's needing to social climb again to keep her family afloat, thus joining in her country's call for this diplomatic mission, hoping to marry rich. Being transported to Sengoku era Japan was not on her agenda and she's definitely not happy about this new life turn.

Misc. Fact: She has eight younger siblings, six sisters and two brothers.

-----

Dorothea "Thea" Reid

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Game: Ikemen Vampire

Suitor: Theodorus van Gogh, Arthur Conan Doyle

Age: Early 20s

Physical Description: Fair skin with lots of freckles, esp on her face and shoulders, long reddish-brown hair that she keeps in a braid most of the time, large blue eyes, medium-tall-ish height (just shy of Theo's eye level)

Personality: Friendly, outgoing, stubborn

Brief History: A lover of history and fashion, Thea had combined her love of both and had just finished her degree to be a fashion historian, and thought to reward herself after finishing college by taking a trip to Paris! Who knew a trip to the Louvre would start her biggest adventure yet?

Misc. Fact: Always wearing something either historical or historically inspired, like long skirts and embroidered blouses.

------

Abigail "Abby" Clarke

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Game: Ikemen Vampire

Suitor: Vincent van Gogh

Age: Early 20s

Physical Description: Short-medium height, blonde bob/short hair that she grows longer to shoulder length as she ages, warm brown eyes, fair skin

Personality: Quiet, meek, curious

Brief History: Escaping from a bad situation, Abby finds herself in Paris, admiring the art and history that the city has to offer. Running into a mysterious gentleman that helps her escape some hooligans, she accidentally follows him through his magical time door and ends up in the 19th century! What's a girl to do now?

Misc. Fact: Her favorite hobbies are drawing and photography, though she wasn't really able to explore them as she liked in her previous life. She thrives under the tutelage of history's greats in Comte's mansion.

------

Madeline "Maddie" Fleming

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Game: Ikemen Revolution

Suitor: Harr Silver

Age: 30

Physical Description: Short and curvy, greenish grey short hair that's wavy, wine red eyes, light medium skin, ears pierced (once in each lobe, and two at the top of each ear, making a total of six piercings)

Personality: Outgoing, caring, fun

Brief History: Visiting her grandparents in London, Maddie had found herself in James Park, meeting with a nice, if absent-minded gentleman. She had tried to return his lost pocket watch to him, but she accidentally follows him back to Cradle, starting her journey to unlocking powers she previously didn't know she had and to bringing peace between the two warring armies fighting over the magical wonderland she had found herself in.

Misc. Fact: Her power manifests itself mostly in non-living items. When she was younger, she made fake flowers to give to people she knew, singing to them as she worked. Her flowers would then take on characteristics she was singing about (a la Sophie from Howl's Moving Castle book version). Her flowers could make you have more luck on a test or even give you the confidence to confess to your crush! But be careful if you piss her off as her negative vibes can transfer to her targeted item and turn it cursed!

------

Clara Laurent

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her

Game: Ikemen Prince

Suitor: Nokto Klein

Age: 27

Physical Description: Medium skin tone, wavy dark brown hair usually kept in a low bun, short to medium height, pink eyes

Personality: Serious, stubborn, kind

Brief History: A ward of Mr. Akatsuki, she was taken in by bookstore owner at a young age, growing up around books and a love of learning. During a festival, she met with a few of Rhodolite's princes, their interactions watched by Sariel, the prime minister, looking for candidates to be the next Belle, a person with a pure heart that chooses the next king of their country. She is chosen for this role, using her best judgement to make the right choice for her tiny kingdom, especially with the loom threat of war on their heels.

Misc. Fact: Her favorite book series is the Midnight Cinderella saga, telling the varying adventures of a commoner chosen to rule over the fictious kingdom of Wysteria. Her favorite in the series is Byron.

------

Miriam "Miri"

Preferred Pronouns: She/Her, They/Them

Game: Obey Me!

Suitor: Lucifer

Age: Early 20s in season 1, close to late-20s by season 4/nightbringer's timeline

Physical Description: Medium-dark skin tone, pink curly hair that gets to its longest by season 4 (which is mid back), purple to pink gradient eyes, short stature, her pact marks glow when she's actively using her pact bonds. Pact mark locations include: Chest over her heart (Lucifer), behind her right ear (Mammon), Left knee (Leviathan), Right forearm (Satan), Lower back (Asmo), Stomach above the navel (Beel), Neck right on her windpipe (Belphie). Post Season 2, she has Lucifer's Ring of Light on her left hand ring finger. Season 3 and beyond, she has her Sorcerer's Society Tattoo on the back of her right hand, along with a ring on her middle finger that signifies she's a sorcerer and a member of the Sorcerer's Society, given to her by Solomon.

Personality: Curious, kind, stubborn

Brief History: Arriving in Devildom as a little pink sheep, Miri works to find a way to turn herself back into a human, which leads her to being made an exchange student at RAD, a school-like organization run by the devildom prince Diavolo, who hopes to bring the three realms together into peaceful relations. While staying in devildom, she is taken in by a group of powerful demon brothers, former angels from the Celestial Realm fallen from grace. In order to turn herself back into a human, she needs their power and she makes pacts with each to gain their help and support. As her bonds grow stronger with the brothers, so too does her own power, coming to a realization that she is a sorcerer in later seasons, learning to control her powers and to use her powers for good and to help Diavolo's cause to bring the three realms to peace.

Misc. Fact: She loves sweets and hates spicy things. She has a healthy fear of Mammon's extra spicy ramen and refuses it every time it's offered to her. Even regular ramen makes her suspicious after having sampled Mammon's favorite once.

[stagefoureddiediaz]

WIP Wednesday

Its WIP Wednesday and I actually have some writing in progress to share with everyone!!!! if you saw my tease tidbit Tuesday post yesterday, then you will know that a random idea I had for a fic has taken over my soul and I am now writing said fic!! So having teased you with the first 3, short paragraphs, I return to give you a bit more in the hope that you will let me know your thoughts and feed my need for validation and encouragement because at this point I have no idea if its any good or if I can even write in an engaging way for fiction - I have spent far too long writing meta and a academic pieces to know if creative writing is something I am capable of!

So have the next section of chapter one of my as yet untitled (and unedited) Buckley siblings time travel au;

To Bucks right a group of men, not currently dancing were engaged in an animated conversation and gesticulating wildly, they were all dressed up in the latest fashions and as such created a dark patch amongst the bright colours of the rest of the ballroom. At the centre of this group was the newly titled Viscount Teignmouth, cutting a fine figure in a purple suit so dark it was almost black, he had been slyly watching Buck for much of the evening when he wasn’t engaged in the dancing, Indeed, during supper, his eyes had never left Bucks person. Buck had noticed and had enjoyed being looked at, indeed he was contemplating making a move one this dance was over, to see if he truly had managed to attract the attention of the much sort after Viscount or if he was just wishful thinking.

Buck was roused from his musings on what he could soon be getting up too with Teignmouth by Daniel. His brother, at the age of 23 was 5 years Bucks senior, but where Buck was tall, broad and muscular with a mop of blonde curls atop his head and a set of piercing blue eyes, Daniel was several inches shorter and tending towards skinny thanks to a series of childhood illness with straight brown hair and brown eyes. In fact, Buck didn’t look much like the rest of his family at all and accordingly had never felt like he truly fit in with them.

‘Little brother, why are you over here lurking in a corner rather than dancing?’ 

‘Daniel, you know I am trying to keep a low profile tonight since Miss Clark turned down my offer. I am already the talk of the town, I don’t need to fuel the gossips further by dancing.’ Buck replied huffily. 

It was true, he had been trying to keep a low profile since Abby had left him 4 months ago, she had come into some money when an aunt died, and had left to go on a tour of Europe, Buck had suggested going with her, but she had said she needed time to find herself and process things so Buck had said he’d wait for her but she had left Bath without so much as a word to Buck and he had al but lost hope. He had heard through friends that she was currently in Italy having made her way through France and Switzerland and that she was enjoying the company of a variety of people including several male suitors. 

‘You need to get yourself back out there, you only fan the flames of their idle gossiping by not actually participating. Plus I cannot dance with my health as it is currently and as your older brother demand you go and dance several sets on my behalf’ Daniel coaxed.

‘You got bored of being stuck with mother and her constant singing the virtues of Maddie’s Marriage didn’t you?’ Buck said as he fixed his brother with a knowing stare. 

Daniel just grinned back at him ‘Anyone would think Maddie had been made a princess the way she is still going on about it - the wedding was over a year ago. Still better that than her bemoaning my ill health I suppose’ he sighed. 

so there we go - a bit more word building in late Georgian Bath! I'd love to know what you think!

Tagging @honestlydarkprincess @mellaithwen @madneyporchengagement @barbiebuckley-han @tulipfromtheinternet @tarlosbuddie @dollhousejee @spotsandsocks @barbiediaz

[gennianydots]

Sooo, I was doing my daily rewatch of Bad Buddy Episode 5 part 4/4, you know, how it be sometimes and it really got me this time for whatever reason. I was reminded of a convo I had with Abby aka @abstractelysium where she mentioned this meta and I can’t let it go. Also I have bad buddy brain rot now until forever because it’s my favorite show but hold onto your hats while I ramble.

My thoughts: *the kiss*

For Pat, the kiss is a relief, the best thing. Pat sees this boy he grew up with and is slowly falling for and he gets to kiss him like he wants to and it’s confirmation of his feelings being returned. It’s the best thing! It’s a “My crush likes me back!” happy dance, the whole lovey-dovey she-bang. It’s a thank god we finally got to kiss, I understand our tension better now, I want to be not just friends but more than friends. Pat doesn’t even think about his parents expectations when he is kissing Pran, in that moment, he’s just a boy who likes another boy. We can see this when he smiles after they stop kissing.

For Pran, the kiss is the worst, the worst possible thing that could happen to him. Yes, it’s confirmation that he still loves Pat, that this horrible crush he just cannot get over is still persistent and alive. It’s confirmation that whatever he has been holding inside (his love for Pat) is now so much harder to deal with because of their parents expectations, their faculty’s fighting at school, and now, Pat seemingly returning Pran’s feelings! For Pran, it’s the end of the world. Pat just had to go and catch feelings and make Pran’s life that much harder. But! Despite all those things, Pran lets himself enjoy the kiss and even kiss back. Why? Because, for a few seconds, he lets himself be just a boy who likes another boy. That’s why Pran kisses Pat the second time. Then, through the tears, through the anguish, and the one happy moment he lets himself have, Pran has to go. In my head, Pran has had a crush on Pat for forever and has always thought of his crush as a nuisance. What’s more is that he’s been heartbroken his whole life, because he thinks he and Pat simply cannot be together. Their parents hate each other so they need to hate each other, too, right? So Pran remembers, oh yeah, this cannot happen. A relationship like that cannot happen. It’s easier to go back to being heartbroken all over again, forgetting that it ever happened, it’s easier to ignore his feelings like he has for his whole life.

It’s like Cinderella holding on to her special night with the Prince thinking she’s never going to see him again, but because she got this magical moment she can hold onto, maybe just maybe that evening is enough to carry her through her worst days. But as we know, the Prince doesn’t forget about it and similarly, Pat doesn’t let Pran forget, he downright refuses to not annoy Pran about what transpired on the rooftop.

👨🏽‍❤️‍💋‍👨🏾 🌃 I love these boys so much. I love Ohm and Nanon’s acting so much. Part of me wishes I had been here when it was airing but oh by gosh by golly I sure am glad I’m here now. 💜💙

[aspoonofsugar]

Hello! Have you played /watched a playthrough of Last of Us Part II. Was hoping to have your thoughts on it.

Hello anon!

I have just watched it for you :D I had wanted to go at it for a while, but never found the motivation, so thank you.

In general, I loved it very much. It is a raw, painful and brave story to tell. As for some meta thoughts, here they come, but please consider I have only watched a playthrough once, so surely I am missing many details.

I think one of the authors said that the main theme of The Last of Us Part 2 is hate, in juxtaposition with Part 1 that focused on love. It shows.

At its root, tlou 2 explores what hates does to people and how it ruins lives. It also tries to understand how one can be free from it. Both Ellie and Abby go through parallel journeys of vengeance because deep down they wanna be free. They can't overcome their loss, anger is poisoning their relationships and nightmares torment them. This is why the 2 girls hope that by killing the one responsible for their pain, they are gonna find peace. However, they are wrong.

In the end, a sense of closure does not come through vengeance, but through a meaningful relationship with another and it is specifically this one bond that stops Abby and Ellie from killing the other.

For Abby this key relationship is Lev, a child, the future:

For Ellie, it is Joel, a father, the past:

This difference is at the root of their foiling and of Abby and Ellie's parallel, but opposite journeys.

Let's go deeper.

WLF VS SCARS AND ABBY VS ELLIE -REMNANTS OF THE FIREFLIES

Before focusing on the 2 girls, let's consider the setting. The war destroying Seattle is a macro-representation of our 2 protagonists' feud. It is a fight between 2 factions that seem superficially different, but deep down are just the same. The WLFs consider the Seraphites a bunch of brainwashed cultists, but their organization too turns out to be a cult centered around a strong leader. Does Isaac say to kill all trespassers? The WLFs obey, no matter if the trespassers are people in need or even potential allies. Does Isaac decide to invade the island? The WLFs invest all their people and resources on a suicide mission most of them are actually against. In general, the WLFs like to think of themselves as different from the weird fanatics they are fighting, but they are just as cultish and as closed off (like a pack of wolves).

This same dynamic can be seen with Abby towards Joel and with Ellie towards Abby. Joel killed Abby's father, so she decides to punish him. However, she does not consider she is hurting someone else, like she was hurt. Similarly, Ellie goes on a rampage of revenge against Abby's friends and grows more and more like Abby. However, both Abby and Ellie refuse to see their similarities with the object of their hate. They are delivering justice, not giving in to revenge.

The end result of such a mentality is shown by how the WLFs/Seraphite's conflict ends. Both sides are annihilated and left exausted and vulnerable. There is no winner. This is what's going to happen to Abby and Ellie if they do not stop in time. They should try to overcome their differences instead. To understand each other. It is not by chance that the 2 survivors of the final fight on the Seraphites' island are Abby and Lev, 2 people from opposite sides that have grown closer because of empathy.

At the same time, the WLFs and the Seraphites symbolically represent 2 sides of the Fireflies, but in a corrupted form.

The WLFs are a paramilitary organization that used to oppose the Government until they won the war and took control. However, by this point they have just turned into another dictatorship with Isaac at its top

The Seraphites are a religious community that offered an alternative to FEDRA rooted in faith. However, after the prophet's death, they grew more and more fanatic

The Fireflies were an organization that embodied both ways of living. On the one hand they were an armed guerrilla group that opposed the government. On the other hand they embodied faith and the hope for a new brighter future. They walked a fine line between an army and a religious movement. They tried to combine realism with idealism. Once they are gone, humanity is left (symbolically) with nothing, but 2 corrupted imitations.

The same goes for Abby and Ellie. In a sense, they too are remnants of that dream the fireflies embodied.

For Abby, it is easier to see. She herself used to serve in the Fireflies. The end of the organization means the death of her father and the loss of her home. She and her friends are forced to find a new place of belonging and end up in the WLFs. An empty shell of the more idealistic Fireflies.

Still, for Ellie too the end of the Fireflies is important. It means the end of Ellie's faith, both in a greater scheme and in Joel:

Ellie: You're such an asshole! I was supposed to die in that hospital. My life would've fucking mattered. But you took that from me.

Tlou part 2 is a story that deals with the consequences of Joel's choice to save Ellie by destroying the Fireflies. This is why he is immediately killed as payback for his actions in the climax of part 1. This is why the setting has 2 pale imitations of the Fireflies. This is why Abby and Ellie's story is ultimately their struggle to live in a world without faith and how that can't really be done. Deep down, humans need something to believe in.

ABBY AND LEV - FINDING FAITH

Abby's meeting with Yara and Lev is really just her meeting a different version of Joel and Ellie. As a matter of fact Yara and Lev are a family running away from an organization that wants them dead for the greater good.

Ellie and Joel must be sacrificed to make a vaccine

Yara and Lev must be killed because they betrayed their faith

Through this foiling it becomes clear why Abby must bond with Yara and Lev in order to develop. Meeting, growing closer and saving them is a chance for her to deal with the shadows and lights of the fireflies.

It is a journey that starts by facing one's own shadows:

Lev: "Only When Weak May I Carry My True Strength."

It is only through weakness, that one discovers their own strength. It is only by facing the darkness, that one can find the light. So, Abby's path of reconciliation with her past self goes through her and Lev helping each other overcome fears. They are symbolically scared of things linked to the other's organization . Abby is scared of heights and the Seraphites (whose name comes from an order of Angels) go around the city by using bridges. Lev is instead scared of dogs and the WLFs use trained dogs in their missions. Abby and Lev learn to know each other and so symbolically they are able to tame their fears and to overcome their prejudices.

After darkness comes the light and this is why after Abby and Lev's mission at the hospital, Abby is able to overcome her nightmares.

She goes from this:

To this:

The last dream is important because Abby is finally able to meet her father again. Moreover, it is meaningful she has this vision after Mel operates Yara and saves her. It is a stark contrast with Abby and Jerry's last meeting:

Jerry: I am begging you to buy in. Marlene: And what if this was Abby? Jerry: Look, everything that we have been fighting for, all the sacrifices, all the horrific... all of that is justified with this one act. Marlene: If this was your daughter, what would you do?

Surgeons are meant to save lives, but in order to make a vaccine Jerry insists he must kill Ellie. It is a contradiction and deep down Abby knows and is struggling to solve this conundrum. The moment her dad chose to go through Ellie's surgery, one way or the other Abby's world crumbled. Since then she has been stuck in hate and death and it is only through Yara and Lev that she is able to free herself and find her dad once again.

This leads her to gain her faith back:

Yara: May her light guide us through the storm. Abby: When you are lost in the darkness... look for the light. Yara: What's that? Abby: Something my dad used to say.

Throughout her journey with the 2 Scars children, Abby's past idealistic self starts appearing more and more until she openly quotes the Fireflies' motto in answer to Yara's religious creed. The faith she thought lost resurfaces. Once this happens, Abby is ready to step in as Lev's big sis in Yara's place. Her transformation into Lev's Joel is finally complete:

And just like Joel before her, this new bond with a child leads to the pursue of something more:

Abby: If anyone can hear me, please reply. Please answer. Firefly: Hi, Abby. We got a clear signal on you. Where in Santa Barbara are you calling from? Abby: Ummm 2425 Constance. We got a tip abut a base, but there is no one here. We're looking for Fireflies. I am a Firefly.

Abby finds faith once again and the Fireflies are revealed to be regrouping. And yet, just like in the first game, this revelation doesn't lead to the happy outcome that should have. Abby and Lev are caught just before they can reach the group and by the end we have no idea if they succeed or not. Will they find the Fireflies? Is there destiny? Will their faith hold? We don't know because deep down Tlou's idea on faith is ambiguous and gray.

ELLIE AND JOEL - WANTING TO FORGIVE

Ellie's revenge quest against Abby is really a journey to grieve and find closure to her complicated relationship with Joel. A bond made of love and hate, that Ellie can't really solve.

This is why her spiral of hate and trauma is juxtaposed with flashbacks that describe how her relationship with Joel had deteriorated through the years. This evolution is explored through the guitar motif, symbolic of their father-daughter's bond.

At the beginning of the game, the first cracks are already appearing because of Joel's lie, but the moment he shows Ellie the guitar and sings for her brings them closer. They leave each other with the promise of guitar lessons and Ellie even asks Joel if he remembers that same joke she had so little interest in before.

Ellie's first flashback starts with her playing the guitar and it is her happiest one. Joel and Ellie are shown to be very close, having fun and joking. However, the end of that memory foreshadows the difficult times to come. Both in terms of Joel's future sudden death at the WLFs' hands:

And in terms of Ellie still not being over what happened at St Mary's hospital:

Her untreated feelings and doubts become more and more obvious one year later when she and Joel are already more distant. Ellie avoids talking with Joel and is unhappy when Tommy forces the 2 of them to spend time together. Symbolically, Ellie's guitar has problems, as well:

Joel: I see you haven't gotten around to changing the strings yet. Ellie: I didn't know I was supposed to.

The guitar needs care, just like Joel and Ellie's relationship. This is why their shared mission is to go look for strings. It is a chance to rebuild trust. However, it doesn't work out because Joel lies once again and refuses to address Ellie's doubts earnestly. In the heat of the fight, the strings are forgotten.

This mix of distrust and lies leads to a breaking point: Ellie goes back to St Mary Hospital and forces Joel to reveal the truth she already knows. After that, she ends their relationship.

However, no matter what Ellie says, her love for Joel is still there, just like her passion for music. That is why the evening that should have started their reconciliation, Joel waits for Ellie playing guitar. This is the outcome of their meeting:

Ellie: I just... I don't think I can ever forgive you for that. But I would like to try.

Which sounds a lot like these words from Part 1:

Sam: Henry says that “They’ve moved on”. That they’re with their families. Like in heaven. Do you think that’s true? Ellie: I go back and forth. I mean, I’d like to believe it. Sam: But you don’t. Ellie: I guess not.

Ellie doesn't believe and doesn't forgive, but she would like to. In this contradiction lies the beauty of her character. It is this wish that stops her from killing Abby in the end. In the climax of the game, Ellie somehow reconciles the 2 sides of Joel.

Violence, pain and hate:

Love and warmth:

The first drives her towards revenge and self-destruction. The second makes her spare Abby.

In the end, Ellie does not kill Lev's Joel. This is the strongest way she has to reaffirm her relationship with Joel and to decide what his legacy is gonna be. It is in this way Ellie can find closure. This closure isn't neat:

She keeps loving guitars, maybe she will be teaching someone else in the future. However, playing without 2 fingers is impossible. This is just like her bond with Joel. She will keep loving him, but their relationship was damaged and now there is no real chance to fix it. This doesn't make their love any less important. Because this wish to love and to forgive is still there. And it keeps at bay the hate and anger.

ELLIE AND ABBY: OVERCOMING HATE

Abby and Ellie have mirrored journeys that lead them to overcome hate in opposite ways. Abby does so by finding faith again (hope for the future), while Ellie does so by choosing forgiveness (peace with the past). In order to succeed they meet each other through empathy:

Their final meeting is full of calls back. On the one hand Ellie ending up hanging from a tree and with a huge wound close to her gut resembles the Seraphites' ritual to "free" their victims through killing them. On the other hand Abby is once again fred from an enemy. Just like Yara and Lev set her free from the Seraphites. Finally, the whole scene is a religious metaphor. Ellie finds Abby crucifixed and must choose if to finish her off or if to save her. This set up frames Ellie and Abby as each other's messiahs. Ellie ends up being Abby's improbable saviour. Abby instead has grown so much in Ellie's imagination that she has somehow become symbolic of all evil. She is an obstacle Ellie needs to overcome. Seeing her in that condition resonates with Ellie and makes her see Abby not as an unreachable entity, but as a human. Ironically, the messianic symbolism surrounding Abby is there to force Ellie to see her opponent as just another person.

Deep down tlou is a series that believes in faith, but not in a God, but in other people and the ability humans have to look for a meaning:

Joel: I struggled with a long time with survivin'. No matter what, you keep finding something to fight for.

This drive is what's at the root of humanity, even in a zombie apocalypse.

These are more or less my main thoughts on the game, hope they were interesting!

Thank you for the ask!

[matan4il]

Spoilers so please answer only after you've watched episode 11 i was wondering what was the significance of showing the plane, truck, train, ferris wheels, and big bear? Definitely want to read your take

Ooooh, Nonnie! Thank you for this fantastic question.

So I've been thinking about this a lot, and the immediate answer is of course that these items represent incidents Buck had been a part of since joining the 118, and where he made a big difference in the lives of people he cares about.

The plane - represents the call in 104 when a plane crashes into the sea. If Buck hadn't been there, Bobby would not have gotten the help that he needed with his recovery, leading to his eventual death.

The big bear picture - represents Maddie's kidnapping by Doug. We learn that without Buck being someone she could run away to, she might have never left her abusive husband. Even then, he was the one who helped track her down during the kidnapping, finding her when she was running in the snow and getting her the first response that she needed to survive her confrontation with Doug.

The truck - represents the call in 218 where the truck crushed Buck's leg. His presence on the scene and the immediate threat to his life spurs Bobby to take action. In doing so, he stops Freddie without any further casualties.

The ferris wheel - represents the tsunami at the start of s3. Buck being on the pier that day with Christopher means he saved his life, but this object represents Chris in general, and how Buck stepping into his life allowed him to continue to live happily with his dad.

The train - represents the derailment that takes place in 318. Buck was there to save Abby's fiance. She might have hurt him deeply with the way she ghosted him, but she was not insignificant in his life, and she still got to have her happy ending thanks to Buck.

Each one of these items represents a person important to Buck and the difference for the better that he made in their lives. It allows him to remember them even in the (at first) seemingly perfect dream world, recognize this coma dream is not as wonderful as it first appeared and coming to embrace his own value.

But I also think it's so telling what is ABSENT from among these items and people. Something to represent the shooting arc, like a toy gun or a miniature of the street where it happened. Or fuck it, even a horse to represent the ranch where Buck helped heal Eddie's soul, not just save his body. Any such object could have allowed for a flashback to the connected events, so we'd have no doubt Buck is recalling real world Eddie thanks to this item. But there is none!

Let me put it clearly: Eddie is THE ONLY ONE that Buck doesn't need an object to remember. Not only is Eddie the first one that Buck recalls (as I mentioned in my 610 meta), he's also the ONLY ONE whose flashback is triggered simply by talking, by the mere mention of someone having Buck's back. His presence in Buck's mind is that impactful. So once again, just like I mentioned in this ask reply, the absence tied to Eddie actually serves to show how crucial he is to Buck. That Eddie's a life partner. The one who is ALWAYS there, having Buck's back. He doesn't need an object, and in his way, once he enters Buck's life, he's connected to ALL of these things.

When Maddie was kidnapped, Eddie was the only non-parental figure who came to see Buck at the hospital prison, and Eddie offered him the quiet moral support and understanding that he needed. When the truck was crushing Buck's leg, Eddie was the one who held his hand and looked after him all the way to the hospital. Chris would not be anyone to Buck if it hadn't been for Eddie decision to allow Buck into their lives and become the other significant figure in Christopher's life, prompting Buck to jump into the water during the tsunami to save their son. And Eddie was there to see Abby's return, and his quiet rage at Buck being willing to risk his own life in order to save her fiance was one of those moments telling Buck indirectly that he does matter, that he's not expendable and that Eddie has always seen that.

Thank you again for the question, I hope I managed to answer it! As always, my ask tag. xoxox

[the-forest-library]

August 2022 Reads

Half a Soul - Olivia Atwater

The Lord Sorcier - Olivia Atwater

The Latch Key - Olivia Atwater

My Imaginary Mary - Cynthia Hand

Inheritance - Katharine McGee

Trick - Natalia Faster

The Fixer Upper - Lauren Forsythe

Thank You for Listening - Julia Whelan

Where It All Lands - Jennie Wexler

Would You Rather - Allison Ashley

Mad About You - Mhairi McFarlane

Seatmate - Cara Bastone

Just Haven’t Met You Yet - Sophie Cousins

Luck and Last Resorts - Sarah Grunder Ruiz

The Very Secret Society of Irregular Witches - Sangu Bandanna

When a Scot Ties the Knot - Tessa Dare

So Happy for You - Celia Laskey

Mika in Real Life - Emiko Jean

Misrule - Heather Walter

Alias Emma - Ava Glass

The Turn of the Key - Ruth Ware

On a Sunbeam - Tillie Walden

A Career in Books - Kate Gavino

Cornbread & Poppy - Matthew Cordell

I’m Glad My Mom Died - Jennette McCurdy

Nothing Like I Imagined - Mindy Kaling

Maybe You Should Talk to Someone - Lori Gottlieb

Vagina Obscura - Rachel E. Gross

Reasons to Stay Alive - Matt Haig

No Cure for Being Human - Kate Bowler

Crying in the Bathroom - Erika L. Sanchez

One Day We’ll All Be Dead and None of This Will Matter - Scaachi Koul

I Might Regret This - Abbi Jacobson

You’ll Grow Out of It - Jessi Klein

How Are You, Really? - Jenna Kutcher

Rough Draft - Katy Tur

The Social Anxiety Cure - Frank Steven

All That She Carried - Tiya Miles

The Lazy Genius Kitchen - Kendra Apache

Bold = Highly Recommend Italics = Worth It Crossed out = Nope

Thoughts:

Julia Whelan is an audiobook narrator who became an author, and her second book (which she narrates), Thank You for Listening, features a fun and heartfelt plot about the world of audiobooks. It’s super-meta and a good time. 

Best discovery of the month is Olivia Atwater (thank you @freckles-and-books for recommending her books!). I don’t normally like fae stories, but Half a Soul was just delightful. 

Since my life this year has been a quagmire of weird medical mysteries, it seems that all I do is stay home and listen to audiobooks. And, yeah, I’ve been getting through a lot of them. I increased my Goodreads Goal to 350. 

Goodreads Goal: 272/350

2017 Reads | 2018 Reads | 2019 Reads | 2020 Reads | 2021 Reads |

2022 Reads

[kim-ruzek]

REE MY LOVE YOU’RE BACK!!! The prodigal friend hath returned!! Oh how I’ve missed you! I’m so glad you took a step back and focused on you, I truly admire you for it. Hopefully you’re greeted with nothing but love. How are you feeling? What are you looking forward to catching up on? I wanna know it all! 🥰💛

Abby, hiiiiii!!!! ♥️ God I've missed you, the smile I got on my face when I saw this ask!!!! Which is precisely the feeling I've missed having and made me want to come back!

I have been greeted with so much love, which is just wonderful, especially as it's reminding me of alllll the positives that come from being here.

I am feeling good! In a lot of ways I'm still fragile but I've set up safeguarding for myself to help me so I feel confident about hopefully staying good. Honestly, the thing I'm most excited about catching up on is the gifsets of both the cpd episodes that stole my heart AND allllllll the glorious chenford gifsets. I'm also really looking forward to rewatching stuff and doing my metas, although I am also really nervous about that because I don't want any drama in my life which means staying away from certain stuff.

But honestly, chenford has kept me going through the last few months and my heart just bursts every time I see them being the cutest cuties that ever lived so if I could describe how I'm feeling in a word that's not an emotion but feels like it should be, it'd be chenford.

And OH. actually what I'm most looking forward to catching up on: FANFIC. I've been away from it for agessssss now and while there's probably only like a handful of new burzek fics lol, I know chenford will deliver. And I'm very much looking forward to that.

I'm also looking forward to writing my own fanfic; I have a lot of chenford fics I want to write although I'm unsure on how long that'll take me because at the moment I'm living in heaven seeing canon chenford on my screen so it's hard to sum up the want to write when I could just rewatch lol, but I have a lot of burzek buzzing around in my head (and other oc ships...) Although that also might take me so time since this year I'm also (re) writing my original story which is exciting but does mean I'll be splitting my writing time.

Not so much catching up on but still very much looking forward to-- Kim's storyline stuff this season. I'm already loving everything so much so far and I'm so pleased with what having a woman in charge is doing for the show. I'm also looking forward to the 200th.

And finally, I'm just really looking forward to catching up with all my friends! I've missed y'all so much and hearing what everyone is up to and thinking about these shows we love. Also looking forward to actually showing my burzek discord some love lol, I've been a bad admin.

ANYWAY. thank you for this lovely lovely welcome back Abby, it really feels good to be back and I look forward to catching up with you my lovely (especially hearing your thoughts on chenford 👀)!!! 💖💖💖

[hpdselfshipper]

Introduction

Hi! It's a sideblog for self shipping. Main blog is @nexylaza.

I don't have any dni and rarely block anyone, because it's too energy draining to constantly check these things, so unless you being directly rude to me I don't mind anyone interacting with the blog. Thank you for understanding. Also I don't mind sharing f/os.

Feel free to send me any asks. It may take time to get answered so yeah.

I mostly reblog stuff but occasionally post original content.

F/O list

Romantic F/Os

The Batter (OFF) #batter my beloved

Platonic F/Os

Zacharie (OFF)

Nico (OneShot)

Ralsei (Deltarune) #fluffy boy

Discarded Vessel (Deltarune) #lost then found

Omori (Omori)

Abbi (Omori)

Green mage (Everhood) #green bro

I don't have any idea what type of relationship is this F/Os

Kris (Deltarune) yes this is so complicated so I created separated section for them only

My S/I

Polina Kozhevnikova Alexandrovna

In short Polina or Polya. 24 years old woman. She live alone in two rooms apartment. She really obsessed over puppetry and meta rpg maker video games. She's loud and sometimes impulsive. She's a source of different and unique ideas but most of the time she doesn't accomplish any of these. She struggled a lot with organizing through her life so she gathered a lot of information about this topic and made somehow working system in her home. Her journey with getting known with different F/Os starts when she suddenly getting sucked in new game on her computer.

Tags

#rb — reblogs

#original — my original posts

#writing — writings mostly about f/os and stuff relevant to the main plot.

#ask answered — answers to asks I get

[lesbiankiliel]

I posted 15,950 times in 2022

That's 1,279 more posts than 2021!

469 posts created (3%)

15,481 posts reblogged (97%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@lady-of-the-spirit

@reputation

@myrskytuuli

@luka-button

@his-name-is-ed

I tagged 13,827 of my posts in 2022

Only 13% of my posts had no tags

#the owl house - 1,004 posts

#video - 948 posts

#our flag means death - 936 posts

#esc - 551 posts

#kitties - 501 posts

#esc 2022 - 495 posts

#what we do in the shadows - 461 posts

#luz noceda - 430 posts

#erina watches esc - 314 posts

#blackbonnet - 301 posts

Longest Tag: 139 characters

#oot kasannu kärryni täyteen epäolennaista einestä! kato nyt näitä! kanelia oreganoa korianteria... mitä hiivatin peijakasta on korianteri?!

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

camila saw five traumatized kids, one of whom is her own daughter, and decided that la chancla isn't enough. she needs a baseball bat

675 notes - Posted September 15, 2022

#4

one of my absolute favorite things about first kill is that it actually gets romeo and juliet and the starcrossed lovers trope

"two houses, both alike in dignity"

we get some really good lore from both sides, both families stretch out hundreds if not thousands of years, they're treated as equals in the show

both alike in dignity

I'm not a meta writer so here's where my train of thought ended but it's so rare that a piece of media using the starcrossed lovers trope actually gets that part

769 notes - Posted June 11, 2022

#3

one of my favorite things about the owl house is how much it drags harry potter

810 notes - Posted August 20, 2022

#2

tan france calling me "my love" would, no lies, be the equivalent of three months of therapy for me

1,338 notes - Posted January 2, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

me watching mei doodle her crush: hahaha I did that

me watching priya read what was essentially twilight: hahaha I did that

me watching miriam take care of her friend's tamagotchi: hahaha I did that

me watching abby do.... anything: hahaha I did that

my point? I was all these girls in some way when I was that age

thank you domee shi for creating this movie, it was wonderful ♥️

3,352 notes - Posted March 12, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[sophieinwonderland]

I'm the anon who was asking about imagination vs plurality! Thanks for answering it. I still don't find it very relatable on the basis of having DID, but I like to hear from people who experience it different from me. I think I agree that maybe some imagination is always in play for me too, like with headspace stuff, but I don't feel like it facilitates my plurality. I don't have too much trouble distinguishing between my NPCs and parts, but I do have a lot of trouble distinguishing between my PTSD parts and DID parts. Your answer helped me understand what it might be like for other plurals though so thank you!

No problem! You're very welcome!

I'd actually be interested in hearing how you and others differentiate between NPCs and headmates.

With Abby and Almond, one of the key differentiating factors for us was this unintended meta awareness. As NPCs, they didn’t have access to the thoughts of the rest of the system. My host and I could always hear each other’s thoughts. NPCs can only hear what we want them to hear. We considered them tulpas once they could hear our thoughts and understood the nature of their existence.

I've always wondered how we could reliably know the difference if we experienced inter-identity amnesia. It seems like relying on being able to prevent them from knowing our thoughts would no longer be a reliable metric.