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#that being said WHAT A GREAT DAY TO BE GAY I CANNOT STOP SMILING
ageofhearingloss · 1 year
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sorry yall, you know i love all of you so fucking much, but please let this day be a celebration for josh! i know some members of josh lane must be feeling some type of way but this is far beyond us!!!!! we need to be happy for him, and support him NO. MATTER. WHAT. no matter what all of our delulu brains are telling us, it's not about that. this is about HIM, and we need to respect that and not make it about us! WE NEED TO CELEBRATE HIM AND PROTECT HIM AT ALL COSTS! he was incredibly vulnerable with us today, and we need to be respectful of that! it's not about us, but it is about our love for WHO HE IS and what he continues to do for us and his community! this is beyond the fics we write, beyond the scenarios we create in our heads. this is real, and we need to value that! we all came to this space to share our love for these men and this band, and that is more relevant now than ever. WHERE THERE IS LOVE WE WILL LIVE ON AND WHERE THERE IS NOT LOVE WE MUST PROVIDE IT, YEAH???? he's going to get an insane amount of backlash and as the peaceful army, we need to stand up and fight back. whether you're an ally or part of this community, this is an opportunity for us to show our unwavering love and support!
i'm obvi just talking about josh rn but i think it's a great reminder that being a member of the peaceful army means that we will fight, support, and love every kind of person on the planet and if you cannot live up to that expectation, then you need to check yourself and your priorities
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innytoes · 2 years
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Chaotic prompt: "Oh no, she's hot" for the polycule of your choice
What Luke and his boys had was perfect. It was more than love, it was trust, belonging, connection. It was home. And when they made music together, the got to share that connection with everyone.
He hadn't thought it could get any better, except then Willie literally came crashing into Alex' life, and theirs by extension. It had taken a few conversations, and yeah, maybe Luke had to learn to tamp down on his jealousy a bit. Especially once he got to know Willie and he started to get jealous of both him and of Alex for getting to kiss him.
But then Willie had joined them, all of them, and it was like they were even stronger, even better than before. Like they were complete in a way they hadn't even known was possible.
And then came Julie.
The song they'd been working on just didn't work with their vocal range, so they'd put out feelers for a female vocalist. And as soon as they heard her sing on her audition tape, they knew she was the one. So Bobby and Alex sent her the e-mail (because Alex was good at the polite stuff, and Bobby was good at 'not typing in all caps or adding emojis to business e-mails') and Willie and Reggie made cookies for the day she was supposed to stop by the studio, and Luke...
Luke may have written three more songs before the week was out, just imagining what they could do with a voice like that added to their range. Looking back, he was already a little in love with her then, just from that 2 minute audio clip.
So when Julie knocked on the door and came in, his first thought had been: oh no, she's hot.
He'd been totally professional, of course. Super excited and passionate and a little bit of a weirdo, but super professional. This was about music. His crush could wait. Julie fit in great with the band, and by the end of the hour they'd had scheduled, they were already jamming out together, Willie giving them a solo standing ovation when they finished.
One hour turned into two, into three, and then all the cookies were gone and Julie had to excuse herself because she was meeting her dad for dinner. They talked a little afterwards, about how good Julie's voice fit with the song, how she clicked with the band. Maybe the terms 'wrecking ball of talent' and 'voice of an angel' were thrown around. But Luke was being utterly professional, one hundred per cent.
It was actually Reggie who brought it up. "So like... Julie's really pretty."
"Oh, totally," Willie agreed.
"Yeah," Bobby said.
Luke blinked. Were they making fun of him? But they weren't wearing their 'make fun of Luke' faces. "You guys really think so?"
"Dude, I'm gay as hell and I can tell she's pretty. All three of you got heart-eyes the minute she walked in," Alex pointed out. Reggie had the decency to blush, but Bobby just looked back and shrugged at him.
And really it seemed like it was up to Luke to be the professional one here. "We cannot mess this up, guys," he said sternly. "We need her for this song. She's perfect."
"Okay, so like... we ask her out after we've finished recording?" Bobby asked. Reggie was nodding fiercely, looking from Bobby to Luke hopefully. Luke shared a look with Alex, who smiled and nodded, and Willie, who gave him a thumbs up. If they didn't mind them dating a girl, or at least asking a girl out, then maybe it was okay. There was just... there was this connection when they sang. Luke knew it would work out in the end.
"Yeah, totally we ask her out after we finish recording."
In the end, Julie says yes and they record many, many more songs together. And they're happy, because just like his boys, Julie is home.
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I cannot decide what my favourite part of RWARB is because it's all too good to just pick one scene. Anyway not to pull an Alex or anything but here's an incomplete list of some of my favourite parts:
The turkey incident.
Bitch McConnell.
Henry and Alex arguing over which Star Wars movie is the best (Alex is right).
Alex's sexuality crisis.
When Alex said he thought if Henry would kill him it would be up-close, personal, and sensuous, and Henry got all flustered.
"I've been gay as a maypole since the day I came out of Mum, Philip."
The mural of Firstprince as Han and Leia. ❤🧡💛💚💙💜
Prince Consort Road.
The fact that Alex's security and Henry's security were in a fucking long-distance relationship the whole-ass time.
Alex's complete obliviousness to the true nature of Nora and June’s feelings toward each other.
Right out of the gate we get Alex wanting June to read aloud fanfiction about him omg I love him so much.
EXPLORING YOUR SEXUALITY: HEALTHY, BUT DOES IT HAVE TO BE WITH THE PRINCE OF ENGLAND?
"I want you - " "The fucking have me."
"You obtuse fucking asshole."
Alex tying Henry’s hands to the bedpost with a fucking necktie.
CAKEGATE.
The way Alex got so turned on watching Henry play polo.
Alex literally shoving Henry back into the closet to hide him from Zahra.
Making out against the portrait of Alexander Hamilton, Alex’s namesake, bicon, who is probably smiling fondly and very proudly at Alex from the grave.
Henry calling Alex "love."
"He just . . . Well, he gets told he’s great a lot. He just doesn’t often get told he’s good enough."
"Tell Shaan I say hi and I miss that sweet sweet ass xoxoxo." "I will not."
"You are the thistle in the tender and sensitive arse crack of my life." "Thanks!"
Alex calling Henry’s dad a "total babe."
ALL THE EMAILS!
"Hoe Dameron."
"I'm gonna take your pants off now." "Yes, good, carry on."
"Act like the sun shines out of his dick."
"He wants to set himself on fire, but he can't afford for anyone to see him burn."
Henry’s favourite author being Jane Austen. 💖💖💖
Okay I'm gonna stop now because that's like half the book.
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engie-ivy · 3 years
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Marlene’s little brother has a thing for Sirius, because who doesn't have a thing for Sirius? Marlene is freaking out, and everyone thinks it's just hilarious. Remus would've thought it was hilarious too, had Marlene’s little brother not been very close in age, cute, witty, and oh so bloody charming.
Somewhat longer fic that will be added to my Crush Confessions Series! 3756 words, so not that long. Wolfstar Fluff, of course😎
Muggle Charms
James Potter’s garden party is the event of the summer. Everyone gets together at the Potter estate for a day of listening to music, swimming in the lake (yes, there’s a lake on the grounds of the Potter estate), and playing friendly Quidditch matches. Mrs Potter walks around with all sorts of delicious foods, James and Sirius fly their brooms above the lake and make bets who dares to jump off from the greatest height, Mary and Emmeline are sunbathing and make bets who will need to be healed first.
It had started the summer after first year with just the four Marauders, but every year, their number has grown, and this year is the largest group thus far.
Marlene McKinnon is last to arrive, and, as usual, her arrival doesn’t go unnoticed.
“Everyone, come meet my little brother!” She shouts across the field.
The McKinnons have four children. Marlene’s mother and two of her siblings are Muggles, while the rest have magical abilities. Marlene’s sister is the oldest of the siblings. She’s a Muggle who works as a primary school teacher. Despite growing up with a father who’s a wizard, she has always felt slightly uncomfortable around magic, but she loves her family fiercely and is very protective over her younger siblings. As she’s much older than Marlene, she has always been more like a second mother.
Next comes Marlene’s older brother, who’s wizard, but has finished Hogwarts long ago. He now works in the Sales Department for a company that develops novel potions against levitation- and portkey-sickness. According to Marlene he’s a serious businessman by day, and a giant goofball by night.
Last is Marlene’s younger brother. He’s a Muggle, but where Marlene’s sister likes to pretend magic doesn’t exist, he thinks it mighty fascinating. He and Marlene are incredibly close, writing each other constantly and hanging out as often as they can when Marlene was home from Hogwarts. She has never brought him to James’ garden party, though. He works in the Food Service Industry, and the bright summer days on which James plans his parties are the days on which he most likely has to work. This year, however, he had managed to get the day off.
The first thing Remus thinks is that the McKinnons have good genes. He can’t really tell which of the two siblings is older, which means they must be very close in age. The boy has the same thick, blond hair and bright blue eyes as Marlene, as well as the same freckles from the sun. He’s short for a guy, barely taller than Marlene, but he’s quite muscular, with broad shoulders. All in all, Marlene’s younger brother is a very cute guy.
“Everyone, this is Miles!” Marlene says, when everyone has gathered around. “Let’s see... Here we have James Potter, he’s the host.”
Miles grins at James. “Some house you’ve got here, mate. Thanks for having me!”
James grins back and lifts his beer. “Cheers, mate!”
“James is Lily’s boyfriend,” Marlene says. “You’ve already met Lily-” Miles gives Lily a warm smile “-and of course you know Dorcas.”
“Hullo Dorky.”
“Hiya Miley.”
“And here we have my other girls, Alice Fortescue, Mary McDonald and Emmeline Vance.” Marlene points each of the girls out, and Miles gives them all a friendly nod.
“And these two are the Prewetts, Fabian and Gideon- don’t worry about who’s who, none of us actually knows.”
“Oi!”
“And this is Caradoc Dearborn, and this Benjy Fenwick, so miraculously you’re not the shortest guy here.”
“Marlene!”
“And here we have the rest of the renegades, Remus Lupin, Peter Pettigrew and Sirius Black.”
The chance in Miles is instant.
The polite smile he was wearing turns into a coy smile, as he gives Sirius a not-so-subtle once-over, though Remus doesn’t think it was ever meant to be subtle. Miles takes a step forward towards Sirius. “Well, hello there.”
Remus can’t blame him. He would’ve reacted the same had he been in Miles’ position (alright, maybe he would’ve turned into a blushing, stuttering mess and forget his own name if he were suddenly faced with a guy like Sirius, instead of step forward with an enticing smile and flirtatious greeting, but that’s beside the point). Sirius looks bloody amazing. His swimming trunks are clinging to his legs, and his damp hair is hanging over his bare chest, with little droplets dripping down his muscular body.
Sirius grins knowingly at Miles. “Hi.”
Marlene’s head whirls around from Miles to Sirius to Miles and back to Sirius, so fast Remus worries she might get a whiplash.
“No,” she says. “No, nope, uh-uh, absolutely not. Not. Happening. No.”
She steps between her brother and Sirius, facing the latter, and jabbing a finger against his chest. “You are not going to try anything on my little brother, got it?”
Sirius holds up his hands and takes a step back. “I only said hi.”
Marlene looks at him suspiciously, like she suspects Sirius saying hi is some sort of secret seduction technique (which would actually explain a lot).
“C’mon Marls.” Miles moves to stand next to his sister, and throws an arm over her shoulder. He winks at Sirius. “We all just want to have a good time, don’t we?”
Marlene’s face is getting more red by the second. Her fingers are clutching her cardboard plate, causing it to rumple. She’s clenching her jaw, while intently staring at the pair a bit further on the field.
“I can’t bloody believe it,” she hisses. “If Black thinks I’ll let him hook up with my little brother, he has another thing coming!”
Miles had managed to catch Sirius when he went to grab a drink, and they have been chatting apart from the rest of the group for about half an hour now, to Marlene’s great distress, and everyone else’s amusement. Well, everyone else except for Remus, but he thinks he’s been hiding it quite well.
Remus doesn’t know how the guy does it, but Miles somehow manages to stand closer and closer to Sirius. He’s looking up at him through his lashes, with those big blue eyes and that damned smile, sometimes even going as far as to bite his lip. Sirius has definitely been blushing at some point!
While Remus is the only one who can emphasize with Marlene’s distress over the situation, he really doesn’t like how she’s blaming it all on Sirius, while evidently its her brother who’s acting like a little minx.
“Honestly, Marlene,” Lily says, shaking her head. “Didn’t you talk to Miles about there being an incredibly hot, single gay guy present?”
Remus agrees. Marlene should’ve known what would happen when she decided to introduce her brother to Sirius! You cannot bring him here knowing Sirius is looking like he does, and expect him not to react!
Marlene huffs indignantly. “My little brother is a precious angel who’s not interested in such a thing as ‘hot, single men’!”
Lily looks at Miles and Sirius. Miles seems to be laughing at something Sirius said, and touches his upper arm while doing so, letting his hand slide down Sirius’ bicep. Lily turns her head back to Marlene and raises her eyebrow.
Marlene just folds her arms over her chest and pointedly looks away.
Later, when Miles reaches up to brush a strand of hair from Sirius’ face, Marlene’s face has taken on a more purple colour. By this time, she has started angrily chewing on her cardboard plate.
Luckily, everyone’s too busy making fun of Marlene to notice Remus looks like he’s going to be sick.
Normally, a day at the Potter estate flies by, but Remus is positive this day lasts at least three times as long. But Remus has been getting through it. He hopes that after today, he won’t see Miles McKinnon of ever again. Well, he mostly hopes Sirius won’t see Miles McKinnon ever again, he can admit that . To himself, that is.
Currently, he’s sitting down with James, having a butterbeer. Just when he thinks he might make it through these last hours without further additions to his misery, Marlene comes striding their way, Dorcas on her heels.
“Potter,” she says, stopping in front of them and placing her fists on her hips. “You’ve got something I need, and I want it now!”
“Sorry McKinnon,” James says with a smirk. “I’m a one woman man.”
“In your dreams, you wanker,” Marlene snaps. “You’ve got an Invisibility Cloak, no?”
James takes off his glasses and starts polishing them with his robes. “I may or may not possess such a thing.”
Marlene rolls her eyes. “After seven years of going to school with you, I think I can safely say that you do. Well, I need you to use it. Miles asked Black to take him on a tour around the lake.” She scrunches up her nose. “And you have to follow them so you can report back to me whether Black has kept his paws off of my little brother!”
“More the other way around,” Remus mutters, but Marlene hears and glares at him.
“My sweet and innocent little brother would never do such a thing! He simply... wants to see the surroundings and needs Black for directions.”
Dorcas throws her head back and cackles loudly. “The only directions your ‘sweet and innocent little brother’ is interested in, is the fastest way to get into Sirius Black’s pants!”
Marlene directs a deadly glare at her.
Just when Remus thinks at least Dorcas knows what she’s talking about, she continues. “C’mon Marls, Miles can make his own decisions. Let the boys have some fun!”
Let the boys have some fun? That’s not a good idea! That’s the opposite of a good idea! That’s a terrible idea!
“Well,” Remus says, managing to sound surprisingly calm. “We’re on Mr and Mrs Potter’s property, and Miles has only just been introduced to the gang. I mean, he and Sirius barely know each other. I’d say it’d be rather inappropriate if something happens between them here and now. You don’t want Marlene’s brother to give off the wrong impression.”
James sighs. “What if I lend you the Invisibility Cloak, and you can follow them yourself?”
“Oh, no!” Marlene holds up her hands and takes a step back. “There are certain things I don’t ever want to see my little brother do, or hear my little brother say. If I were to... accidentally stumble upon them, I’d either have to Obliviate myself, or be scarred for life.”
Remus snorts. Not so sure about her brother being so innocent after all, is she?
“Well, Padfoot’s my brother!” James argues.
“Remember when I put in a good word for you with Lily, and finally got her to agree to go on a date with you?” Marlene plays her final card, and effectively.
“Fine!” James puts down his butterbeer and gets up. “Remus, let’s go.”
“What? Me? Why?”
“Because you got me into this, Mr ‘it’d be inappropriate’. And besides, I’ll feel like some perverted Peeping Tom spying on them alone.”
“So better to have two Peeping Toms?” Remus argues, but he knows it’s an argument he’s not going to win.
That’s how Remus finds himself in the place he wants to be least of all, crouched down under the Invisibility Cloak with James, and, after casting a quick Silencio over their footsteps, following on Sirius and Miles on their ‘casual, totally not romantic, definitely not a date’ stroll.
“-and once I’ve gained enough experience, I’d like to come back to London and open my own restaurant!” Miles finishes.
“That’s amazing, Miles!” Sirius exclaims. “I’ll definitely frequent!”
“As long as you don’t expect any free food just because you’re so handsome,” Miles teases.
Sirius gasps in pretend-shock. “I would never use my looks for such purposes!”
“Right,” Miles chuckles. “You be careful, Sirius Black. A face like yours is a powerful weapon.”
“Wow,” James whispers admiringly. “He’s good!”
Remus grits his teeth. Of bloody course Miles McKinnon is all charming and smooth, chatting Sirius up.
“What about you?” Miles asks. “What are your plans for the future, now that you’re some kind of strong and powerful wizard?”
“I’m starting my Healer training soon!” Sirius beams, and Remus can’t help but smile at the pride in his voice.
“That’s... like a doctor, right?” Miles asks.
“Yeah,” Sirius replies. “But without the cutting people open.” He shudders. “Definitely no cutting people open.”
“Oi!” Miles protests, bumping his shoulder against Sirius. “Doctors cut people open to save lives, you know. They don’t do it for a laugh.”
“I’m sorry!” Sirius quickly says. “I didn’t mean to offend. It’s actually very impressive what Muggle doctors can do without magic, and the things they’ve come up with! I’m sorry.”
“Hey, it’s alright,” Miles says, glancing at Sirius. “Don’t worry about it.”
Sirius smiles sheepishly. “Sorry. It’s just... I was raised in this really conservative pureblood Wizarding family. I’m always afraid I’ll say something Muggle-phobic without realising.”
“It’s okay, it wasn’t that bad, honestly.”
“Good,” Sirius says, relieved. “I’m just... trying to be better.”
Miles smiles softly at him. “Just the fact that you’re trying already makes you better.”
They walk in comfortable silence for a moment, until Miles speaks again. “That must’ve been hard though, growing up in a family like that. Marlene already mentioned you’re living here now. Is that why?”
Sirius nods. “I ran away from home the summer before. Best decision I’ve ever made.” There’s a tightness in his voice, though, and an emotion in his eyes that makes Remus want to run towards him and pull him into a hug.
“I’m sorry you had to go through that,” Miles says sincerely. Then he gives Sirius a teasing smile. “Though I must say, it’s a good look on you, the whole ‘sexy rebel’-thing.”
Sirius barks a laugh, and the pained expression slides off his face. “Well, I’m glad my issues at least fit my anaesthetic!”
Remus doesn’t know whether he wants to bless Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile, or whether he wants to curse Miles McKinnon for being able to turn Sirius’ mood around and make him smile.
“I bet you love provoking your family, don’t you?” Miles asks.
“That might just be my most favourite pastime,” Sirius replies sincerely.
Suddenly, Miles stops walking, so Sirius stops as well and turns back to face him.
Miles takes a step towards him. “I bet it would really provoke your family if you were to make out with a boy, a Muggle boy at that.”
Sirius swallows and his face slightly flushes. “That... That’ll definitely do the trick, yeah.”
Miles comes even closer, now almost standing chest-to-chest with Sirius, and he tilts his head up and leans in.
James still looks mighty impressed with Miles’ flirting tactics, while Remus wonders if the sound of his heart shattering might give them away.
Suddenly, Sirius steps back. “Wait, stop. I... I can’t.”
Miles looks disappointed, but not too shocked. “Why not?” He asks. Then he jabs his finger against Sirius’ chest, much like his sister did earlier. “And I swear to god, Sirius Black, if it’s because I’m a Muggle you can stick that wand of yours up your-”
“No, no, no!” Sirius quickly says, whilst letting out a breathless laugh. “It’s not you, really, it’s me.”
Miles gives Sirius a stern look, while placing his fists on his hips, making Remus wonder whether they’re sure Marlene and Miles aren’t twins. “If you’re gonna give me that lame excuse, at least elaborate what it is about ‘not me, but you’ that makes you reject me. I mean, I’m not proposing a marriage here!”
Sirius sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “There’s... someone else. I mean, there’s not really, I don’t have someone else, but I have feelings for someone else. So therefore this-” He gestures between himself and Miles. “Just doesn’t feel right.”
Remus exchanges a look with James, who looks just as stunned as he is by this information.
Miles, though, just folds his arms over his chest and looks at Sirius thoughtfully for a moment. “So, Lupin then?”
Remus freezes. What? Him? Oh no. He’s not sure he can bear to hear Sirius’ denial. ‘Lupin? Remus? No, of course not! What in Godric’s name gave you that idea? Why the hell would I fancy Remus?’
However, Sirius just sighs and looks down at his shoes. “I’m that obvious, huh?”
Remus stares dumbfounded. It’s... true? He feels an eruption of butterflies in his stomach. Well, he always feels some butterflies when he sees Sirius, but now it’s like all those butterflies had babies, and those babies had babies again, creating an immense flutter.
“Nah,” Miles says. “If I had known for sure, I wouldn’t have made a move. I only had a suspicion, but I decided to take a chance anyway. I’m not too surprised by this turn of events, though.”
“It’s really the only reason,” Sirius says. “Because you’re bloody great, you know that? You’re gonna make some guy really happy one day. Anyone would be lucky to have you.”
Miles groans. “ ‘Its not you, it’s me’, ‘anyone would be lucky to have you’. Shall we go before you start telling me we can still be friends?”
Sirius grins. “Normally I’d suggest we at least pretend to have had a good snog, just to see if Marlene’s face can get any more purple, but I don’t want to give Remus the wrong impression. Not that he’d care,” he adds with a mutter.
Miles stops walking again. “What? Are you seri- No, Marlene warned me not to say that. Really?”
Sirius just blinks at him.
Miles shakes his head. “I mean, you asked if you were being obvious, well, you were nothing compared to Lupin. Although, that could just be me. I couldn’t help but notice when he’s looking at me like he wants me to catch fire every time I come near you. Wait. You wizards can actually do that, can’t you?”
Remus huffs. He wouldn’t have actually set Miles on fire! At least he doesn’t think so.
Sirius frowns at Miles. “You must be mistaken. Remus is nothing but pure kindness! He always makes everyone feel welcome! You can’t help but like Remus!”
A warm feeling spreads through Remus’ chest.
Miles just looks at Sirius, shaking his head. “You’re actually in love, aren’t you?”
Sirius blushes and looks away.
“Well,” Miles says. “You should tell him how you feel. He clearly feels the same. Then you can both stop this pining.”
James, who just had to process the shock of one of his best friends fancying another one of his best friends, now has to process the shock of his best friends fancying each other. He’s staring at Remus, and consequently trips over a rock. He does manage to catch is balance, but he lets out a loud yelp.
Miles stares at the empty spot behind them on the path, surprised, but Sirius’ eyes narrow in suspicion. He lifts his wand, and the next moment a gush of wind blows the Invisibility Cloak off of Remus and James.
To his credit, Miles recovers pretty quickly from seeing two people appear seemingly out of nowhere, including the person they were just talking about. He blinks a couple of times, then says “I suppose this works as well.”
Remus and Sirius are just staring at each other.
“Uhm...” James says. “I was sent here by miss McKinnon to escort the younger McKinnon back to the estate.” Because apparently awkward situations make him talk like he’s an eighteen century nobleman. “Off we go, young lad.”
Miles doesn’t protest when James grabs his arm and starts dragging him away, but he does turn around to give Sirius a thumbs up.
“We were sent here by McKinnon,” Remus quickly says, when he and Sirius are alone. “She wanted to know if anything would happen between you and her brother.” Remus takes a deep breath. “And maybe I wanted to know if anything would happen between you and him myself as well,” he says softly.
“Were you jealous?” Sirius asks. It sounds curious, not angry, judgemental or smug, just curious.
Still, Remus can’t help but pout, and he looks away. “Of course I was jealous. Bloody Miles McKinnon, with his big blue eyes, batting those ridiculously long eyelashes at you, and being all cute, and witty, and charming.”
“You know, if you want Miles to snog you instead, you should hurry and you can probably still catch him,” Sirius says irritably.
“No!” Remus quickly says. “No. I just mean, I wish it was me. When he calls you handsome, when he brushes your hair away from your face, when he leans in to kiss you... I wish it was me doing those things.”
“Why don’t you?” Sirius whispers, staring at Remus intently.
“Because!” Remus says desperately. “Because I know how to be your friend, but if I even think about flirting with you, I turn into an awkward, rambling mess.”
The only thing that can possibly be going through Sirius’ mind right now is how the hell he let the sexy, confident, flirtatious boy walk away, to be stuck with the flustered heap of awkwardness that is Remus Lupin.
Remus stares down at his shoes. “I mean, I like you a lot, and also because I feel comfortable around you, I do, but when it comes to flirting, I suddenly get scared that you’ll laugh at me or something. I even think it’d be easier if you weren’t my friend, if we didn’t know each other so well. Then maybe I could-”
Remus stops talking when Sirius gently cups his cheek and tilts his head up. Slowly, ever so slowly, he leans in, giving Remus enough time to pull away had he wanted to. Which, for the record, he absolutely doesn’t. Sirius presses their lips together. And it’s...
Well, it’s not awkward at all.
It’s fireworks, and symphonies, and the sun breaking through the clouds. It’s a sense of belonging, and knowing all is right with the world, and a feeling of coming home.
Both boys are a little out of breath when they pull back, more because of the intense emotions than because the kiss had been that passionate.
“See?” Sirius smiles at Remus. “If I want you to stop rambling, I can always just... interrupt.”
“Rude,” Remus mutters, before pulling Sirius back into another kiss.
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useyernamesteven · 3 years
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(Needed some goofy fluff to distract myself from the angst im writing so buckle up, its long. Based on that one post I cannot find so if anyone can help a homie out, much appreciated)
Raya/Namaari Accidental Marriage Proposal
Its not a far stretch to assume that the different tribes have different practices and rituals. And given the 500 year gap in communication its also easy enough to assume that the tribes don't know about each others differing customs.
For example: marriage proposals. In Tail its as cut-and-dry as asking. Talon people propose with rings and jade coin. When you propose in Spine you chop down a tree to show your commitment and strength.
The Fang propose with blades. Fang people love their knives, daggers, spears, and other pointy weapons, so if you want to ask someone to marry you, you do it with a blade.
I like to imagine it'd be because offering a blade to someone- who isn't family -is the equivalent of trusting your life to that person. I like to think the Fang value not only a person's strength and honour, but their ability to care and protect their people. So giving a blade to your chosen love is like saying, "I'm giving you this weapon because I trust you with my heart, literally and metaphorically".
But again, 500 year old divide means others have no clue what giving a knife to someone from Fang entails...
So maybe its been a few months or so after the Druun have been vanquished. Raya is still re-learning how to be a 'princess' while playing liaison between the tribes, with Sisu as her partner in crime. She likes it because she still gets to travel and she gets to see her new friends from the other tribes: Boun's business is booming, Noi has started talking, and Tong has become the new Chief of Spine.
Then there's Namaari.
Six years of playing cat-and-mouse together (or rather angry kitten and homeless puppy) can be hard to overcome. At first it was a struggle. And incredibly awkward. Namaari, too guilt ridden over what she'd done, and Raya, still angry and socially stunted, could barely hold a conversation together.
Eventually Raya, fed up with the weird awkward talk, dragged Namaari to Fang's training grounds and challenged her to a sparring match. And only when it was over, the both of them exhausted and laying on the ground, did they start talking, actually talking. About what happened with the gem, with Sisu, what they can't let go of, not yet, but what they hope they can move past one day.
It made things after easier because it was familiar ground for them, but it also opened up new paths too. Now in the months since they saved the world and having spent that time working together, Raya would like to consider Namaari a close friend.
Which is probably why she's so surprised when Namaari off-handedly mentions her birthday is next week. Namaari, who's less than thrilled about her mother's plans for a big celebration, doesn't even notice how much Raya's caught off guard. Namaari doesn't really care for her birthday, much less when her mother makes a big deal about it, but she still brushes her hair behind her ear when she asks Raya if she's going to attend.
Raya recovers, nudging Namaari saying that she's obviously going, and boasting about the amazing gift she's going to bring.
Which then leads to her dragging Sisu to Talon in search of the perfect gift (Sisu being the only 'person' she knows who can help being that she's a master gift giver... Sisu's words, not Raya's, but still). They run around Talon for ages, with Sisu practically buying everything in sight (with the Heart Palace Credit of course) but Raya can't find a single thing she thinks Namaari would actually like.
And then she spots a Fang vendor selling blades.
The woman is nice and she asks Raya if she's looking for something in particular. Raya says she wants to get a dagger for 'someone special' from Fang (not wanting to rack up the price if the woman knew who it was for, but also completely unaware to what she's just implied).
The vendor seems a little surprised but she easily walks Raya through picking out the perfect dagger for her 'someone special'. Raya ends up buying a pretty, yet functional dagger with a dragon engraved in the blade and an ornate box to keep it in. As Raya's leaving the woman gives her a pat on the shoulder and says, "All the best for the both of you and I'm sure she'll say yes," which Raya can't really make sense of so she shrugs and leaves to go find Sisu and her mountain of trinkets.
So now its the party, and when Namaari said Virana was making a big deal about it, she really meant it. People from all the tribes are attending and Sisu's brought her brothers and sisters and there's music and food and fireworks...
And Namaari stands beside her mother in a beautiful dress that makes Raya's heart thud erratically (it's totally platonic). Her and her Ba walk up to them and start making small talk before her Ba and Virana break off to chat with other dignitaries, leaving Raya and Namaari together.
Raya likes how Namaari relaxes around her when its just them, despite the room full of people. They talk and banter and tease and laugh, but more than anything Raya just likes being with Namaari. And when Namaari mentions how much she hates formal wear, how dresses don't suit her, Raya makes it a game to see how many times she can mention how beautiful Namaari looks while they're talking, just because it makes Namaari flush and do the hair thing she does when she's shy. No other heart-related reason.
Its not until much later when Raya suddenly remembers the gift she brought and she runs off to fetch it. When she returns she hands Namaari the sleek box with a smile and a sheepish "Happy Birthday dep'la".
And Namaari's blushing and smiling as she takes the box, telling Raya she didn't have to as she opens the box-
And immediately slams it shut. Her face turns bright red and she whorls on Raya with wide eyes and a panicked, hissed "whatareyoudoing?!" And poor Raya's totally thrown, so sure she'd picked out the perfect gift. "You don't like it?" But Namaari shoves the box back into her hands, with another frenzied whisper "thatsnotit!"
Well now Raya's a little miffed because "You didn't even look at it" and before Namaari can stop her she's pulling the dagger from the box and offering it back to Namaari.
Meanwhile the room goes incredibly quiet as everyone from Fang suddenly notices what's happening between the princesses. Virana nearly spits out her drink. Everyone else carries on like normal, but a few people watch their new Fang friends with curious looks, completely out of the loop.
So now Raya's essentially down on one knee without realizing it, Namaari's about to have a heart attack, everyone from Fang is on the edge of their seat, and the dragons are having a rousing drinking contest with people from Spine.
So the party is going great.
Raya (oblivious to the world save for Namaari) is giving Namaari her strongest puppy dog eyes because she'd spent so long looking for the perfect gift dep'la, and "You're pretty special Namaari, special to me, and you deserve it."
Namaari, as red faced as she is, softens at Raya's admission, smiling a little to herself before she takes the dagger from Raya with a soft "it's lovely dep'la".
And suddenly the room's loud again as people from Fang start clapping and whistling. Everyone else is lost but soon they join in as well, despite having no clue as to what they're cheering for. Namaari's back to being flustered and she grabs Raya's hand and hauls her toward Virana and Benja. Raya, finally taking in the room around them, is confused as to why people are congratulating her and Namaari.
Virana has recovered by the time the two approach and if no one knew better it might've also appeared she was trying hard not to smile. Namaari hisses something to her mother Raya doesn't hear, and she shoots her Ba a questioning look. Benja looks a little pensive but he's got a quirk in his lips that Raya knows means mischief.
Virana gently pats her daughter's shoulder before turning to address the room, excusing the four of them. They turn to leave but not before Virana calls out to the crowd, "And it goes without saying you're all invited to the wedding as well," and then ushers her horrified daughter, her baffled betrothed, and Benja out the door.
Instantly Namaari's in hysterics, asking her mother why she'd say that when Raya obviously didn't know what she was doing. Virana, quite obviously playing ignorance, asks why Namaari accepted the blade if she knew what she was doing. And poor Namaari can only gape, red faced and no come back.
Raya has finally caught on to what she's done and yeah, okay now it all makes sense. The vendor, Namaari's (gay) panic, the congratulations... she just proposed to Namaari. She just proposed to Namaari. In front of most of Kumandra. Oh toi!
Benja, still smirking to himself, ruffles Raya's hair before turning to Namaari and Virana and saying, "To be fair... Namaari did propose first."
Marriage proposals in Heart are an exchange of necklaces. So when Namaari had given Raya the Sisu pendant back when they were kids, they'd essentially gotten engaged and since Raya kept it, they've technically been engaged for the past six years.
(Too) Long story short, Raya and Namaari get engaged, get married, fall in love, and live sapphically ever after.
End.
(Okay, I'm done. Back to angst.)
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Alex Danvers wasn’t phased by much. Had she expected to get an alien sister? No. But she went along with it (eventually) and was a good sister. Had she expected to get recruited by a government agency? No. But that was fine, and she was good at her job. Had she expected to be gay? Also no. But she accepted it and she was… well she was a disaster on that front, but she was happy.
The one time that she possibly, maybe, perhaps faltered a little, and thought, ‘this cannot possibly be my life now’, however, was during the months after the arrival of one Lena Luthor to National city.
———
“Alex! I broke Lena Luthor’s chair!”
Alex whirled around to see Supergirl anxiously striding towards her through the DEO, whisper-shouting her name. “You did what?”
Kara came to a stop in front of her, nervously wringing her hands. “I broke Lena Luthor’s chair.”
Alex blinked. “How? I thought you and Clark were just interviewing her?”
“We were! I was just standing behind one of the chairs in front of her desk and holding the back of it and then she looked at me and I wasn’t expecting it and a bit of the chair just kind of broke off in my hand. I tried to squish it back into place and tucked the chair under the desk but I think you might be able to tell if you looked too closely.”
Alex sighed. “Okay. Don’t worry, I’ll get it fixed.”
Kara deflated with relief and grinned. “Thanks Alex.”
Ten minutes later, Alex phoned the L-corp lobby with an excuse to get Lena down there while J’onn phased through her balcony door and swapped the very obviously hand-shaped-dented chair with a new one that would hopefully go unnoticed. She had naively thought that that would be the end of it.
———
A week and a half later, Alex got a panicked phone call from Kara claiming that she had seen Lena at a restaurant and stayed to have brunch with her but there was now a large chunk of table missing from where they had been sitting, caused by Lena laughing at one of her jokes. Suspicion had begun to creep into the back of Alex’s mind but she was too exasperated to pay it any attention.
Kara said she had managed to cover it up with an empty bread basket and persuade Lena they should go to see the crepe stand that had been at the park recently.
Alex, Winn and James had arrived at the restaurant half an hour later in fake uniforms and a fake van, claiming a table replacement had been ordered by the restaurant management. They quickly set up the new table and took away the cornerless one along with the piece of wood that had Kara’s fingerprints permanently embedded in it.
———
Over the next few months, they replaced glasses, vases, windows, tables, chairs, various cutlery, and an array of annoyingly abstract decorations that had to be specially 3D printed because no replacements existed.
A new section of the DEO budget had to be put aside, labelled ‘Cleanup’, and the superfriends became unofficially known as ‘The Cleanup Squad’ (although Winn only said it out loud once, given Alex’s thinly veiled threat afterwards).
It wasn’t until Alex witnessed one of the events that preceded the need for The Cleanup Squad that her subconscious suspicions hit her like the ton of bricks they would have to fix.
It was a standard game night with a shot too many and a brain cell too few, all of them shouting over a game of two truths one lie, when the delivery guy arrived with their food.
Kara went to get the door while Lena had her go. That was the first mistake.
Kara had been sneaking alien alcohol into her drink for the past hour.
Lena’s third sentence was ‘I’m more often attracted to women than men’.
Kara’s foot went through her floorboards with a crunch and she stumbled into her front door, making the whole wall tremble worryingly. Alex shouted out one of the other sentences as a guess to distract Lena from looking behind her to see what the noise was. That was the next mistake.
Kara took the food from a slightly confused looking delivery guy, thanking him and checking the bags as he walked away, as Lena cheered, wine sloshing around in her glass.
“Alex wins! Women are hot and I like to kiss them.”
The door came off its hinges in Kara’s hand and as she went to correct her mistake she smashed it into the doorframe with enough force to bring down a plane. The door, doorframe and half the wall collapsed to the floor, leaving a shellshocked Kara among the rubble, holding a useless doorknob.
Nia slung her arm across Lena’s shoulders to stop her turning around again and cheered. “Woohoo! That’s great! Hey can you teach me how to win at Monopoly?”
Lena frowned. “But only half of us have had a go at-”
“Yeah! You guys set up Monopoly while I go get snacks with James.” Alex not-so-subtly dragged James up with her, glaring at Winn. “What about you, Winn?”
He jumped up with a nervous laugh. “I need the toilet! Yep!”
They all scurried off to where Kara was just standing and blinking. Alex took the food and doorknob from her hands, putting the food on the counter and the doorknob in a nearby vase while Winn and James started haphazardly piling bricks back up into a wall-ish shape. Nia and Brainy seemed to be going through every single Monopoly card and asking Lena about it in a kind of terrifyingly over enthusiastic pop quiz.
Kara snapped out of her daze and began helping as Alex sent a message to the DEO to get a new door there as quickly as possible. She dragged Kara out into the hall and made her laservision off the entire door and doorframe of her neighbour who was luckily currently on holiday. While Kara did that, she kicked the old bits of door and brick dust under a rug in the hall.
Kara fit the new door into the hole that James and Winn were leaving, blowing her freezebreath over the whole wall to freeze it all in place for the time being.
Before she could go back inside, Alex grabbed Kara by the arm. She raised an eyebrow at Kara’s confused look. “Want to explain what just happened?”
Kara blushed and glanced at (or probably through) the door. “I um… I just got distracted by the food.”
“So it was nothing to do with Lena openly admitting she’s bisexual?”
Kara blanched. “I- wha- pff no.”
Alex rolled her eyes and opened the door to let Kara through before she broke anything else.
They all moved back over to the living room area as casually as possible, Winn setting out the food.
Alex leaned down to speak quietly to Kara before she sat down herself. “You know you can talk to me right?”
Kara nodded shyly and she let it go.
———
The last operation The Cleanup Squad did, it was Nia that called.
Alex sat up in bed, having only just managed to fall asleep, and picked up her phone. “Hello?”
“Alex? Kara’s about to break Lena’s coffee table.”
Alex sighed and waved away Kelly’s questioning look. “Okay. I’ll call J’onn.”
Ten minutes later, Alex was hanging onto J’onn like a backpack as he hovered just under Lena’s balcony with a replacement table.
There was a crash from inside.
“What was that?” Lena’s voice came from somewhere further inside her apartment and J’onn floated up to peer through the windows.
“Nothing! Just… a video on my phone.”
Alex’s phone buzzed with what was presumably the panicked text she just watched Kara send.
Kara went further into the apartment, rambling to Lena about how they should get into their pjs before they watch the next movie.
J’onn alighted on the balcony and they quietly made their way inside. J’onn cleared the broken table into a bag and flew off to dispose of it while Alex set down the new one.
Just as she was putting into place, Lena wandered into the room. Their eyes met briefly before Lena turned towards her kitchen, filled a glass of water, and left again, as though she hadn’t seen anything.
J’onn was back in the next moment and they disappeared back out into the night.
———
Lena opened the door with a smile and stepped aside to let Alex in. “Alex. What can I do for you?” She shut the door and led her over to the kitchen. “Tea? Coffee?”
“Coffee please.”
Alex sat down at Lena’s kitchen island, thinking about how to phrase what she was going to say while Lena made them both a coffee.
Lena set a mug down in front of her and sat down across the island, waiting patiently for Alex to start talking.
“Do you know?”
Lena smiled, raising an eyebrow. “I know lots of things.”
Alex rolled her eyes. “Fine. Do you know about what we’ve been doing?”
“You’re going to have to be a little more specific, Danvers.”
She narrowed her eyes. “I know you saw me last night, Luthor. Why didn’t you say anything?”
Lena smiled and shook her head. “Alex, I have the most high tech security system in the world and an IQ that is most definitely higher than a five year old, and even a five year old would be able to notice you lot trying to rebuild furniture around them. Did you really think I didn’t notice? You replaced a $1000 chair with Ikea furniture.”
Alex went to defend herself but just deflated. “Yeah. Sorry.” She swirled her spoon through the coffee foam. “So why didn’t you say anything?”
Lena shrugged. “She’ll tell me when she’s ready.”
Alex watched her for a moment and smiled. Yeah. She was pretty sure she’d be her sister-in-law one day.
———
“Alex?”
She pushed past Kara into her apartment. “I think you should tell Lena.”
Kara blushed and stuttered as she closed the door. “Wha- I- There’s nothing to tell!”
Alex frowned at the odd reaction before she realised what Kara thought she meant and rolled her eyes. “No not that. Well… that too. But that’s not what I meant. I think you should tell her about Supergirl.”
Kara gaped at her. “Really?”
“Yeah. She proved beyond a doubt that she’s trustworthy and I can see how much you two mean to each other.”
Kara bit her lip, looking down and wringing her hands together. “But what if… what if she hates me for it?”
Her eyes were so big and sad and scared when she looked back up that Alex immediately wrapped her in a hug. “That’s not going to happen, okay? And the rest of us are here for you whatever happens. You know that, right?”
Kara nodded against her shoulder. “Okay.”
———
Kara stood outside Lena’s office, trying to drag her courage back from where it had run to hide, and wiping her sweaty palms on her slacks.
The door opened and Lena hesitantly poked her head out. “You doing okay out here?”
Kara gave a strangled laugh and nodded unconvincingly.
Lena stepped out of her office to join Kara in the corridor. “Okay, well, do you want to tell me why you’ve been standing out here for the past ten minutes?”
She gulped, breathing getting a little faster.
“Hey, hey it’s okay.”
Lena took her hand, stroking her thumb across her knuckles gently. It calmed her down a little and she sighed, leaning back against the wall and sliding down it, hand slipping out of Lena’s.
Lena came and sat on the floor beside her, offering her hand again.
Kara gladly tangled their fingers together, smiling sheepishly. “Sorry, my hand’s a little sweaty.”
Lena laughed and bumped their shoulders together. “That’s okay.”
Kara sighed and brought her other hand up to her glasses. “Lena, I-” She closed her eyes and removed her glasses with a shaky hand.
She felt gentle fingers take them from her grasp and opened her eyes to watch Lena carefully fold them up and place them on the floor beside them. She looked at Kara with a soft smile. She reached up and traced the same fingertips across Kara’s cheek, making her eyes flutter closed.
“I know.”
Kara’s eyes snapped open. “You did?”
She nodded.
“Oh. Well now I feel like I’ve made you sit out here on the floor with me for nothing.”
Lena laughed, her eyes and nose crinkling adorably, and Kara couldn’t stop herself from smiling even as her heart beat faster.
“Well since you already knew I was Supergirl, I feel like I should tell you a different secret. Like how I think I’m in love with you.”
Lena’s breath hitched, eyes flitting between Kara’s as they subconsciously leaned slowly closer. “You think?”
Her tongue darted out to wet her lips and Lena’s eyes followed. “I know.”
“Good. Because I am definitely in love with you.”
Any other thoughts melted away when their lips met. Kara’s hand automatically slid to Lena’s waist as Lena pressed closer, soft and warm and perfect.
There was a crunch and Kara fell backwards a little, accidentally pulling Lena so she was almost in her lap, as she made a hole in the wall with her back. They broke apart giggling, resting their foreheads together.
“Sorry.”
Lena kissed her again but they were both smiling too much for it to last long. “At least you don’t have to call Alex everytime you break something around me now.”
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discotechque · 3 years
Text
till my hand shook with the way I fear
pairing: abed nadir/nby! reader word count: 1.6k rating: T
me and abed have neurodivergent solidarity and for that, we would be besties. also the mc in this is specifically non-binary so whatever.
There's clear haze that settles over the bar, that's the first thing Abed realizes once he settles into the space. It's dim, like most bars are and he assumes that's the charm of places like these. Jeff and Britta are adults ( he is too but he's overlooked and therefore his opinion is mute ) so he follows their guidance. Watching from afar, observing their inebriated choices while downing another shot.
He doesn’t get the point of alcohol, much less bars, and it seems the whole point is to get pleasure after an initial sting. A sharp weight that lays in the back of one's throat before elation rips through you. Bourbon burns through him with too much consequence, gin coats his mouth with a bitter tang, and wine falls flat on his tongue.
Maybe it's his upbringing, he's never witnessed his father take a sip to this day, or the pressure that rushes to his frame when he's offered a drink. Abed understands the appeal of bars, it does not mean he shares the same sentiments to them. They're noisy little backend places where melancholic characters come to waste away their sorrows, typically finding pathetic people who drool over glass rims.
However, he is not pathetic ( even if his oldest friend is rounding his seventies and community college all seemed like a folly ) and he had never been overtly dripping with melancholy. So he stood by the small arcade game in the corner, unbothered and safe, until someone offered kindness.
And he takes miles of that even if all they've given was an inch because even if he isn't pathetic or melancholic, he is greedy. He likes eyes being on him because he has so many thought he wants to share with one mouth that can only do so much. Abed is not dumb, he knows what the man wants and how his friendly touches are slowly rising above his knee.
He knows what the man wants and isn't surprise at his outburst once learning that the feelings isn't reciprocated. There's streams of Mint Julep dripping from his jaw and lashes, softly mumbling about his love for Farscape before having it degraded. Abed knows he deserves it and was warned by Annie that people are sensitive ( but he is not held by the bounds of common decency or empathy no matter how hard he tries to keep his mouth shut. )
Then, he remembers the man's proposition ( the only reason someone would be interested in him ). He isn't familiar with being viewed as a sexual object and men weren't unwelcome in his eyes. Gay? Is he gay? Maybe something that exists within the unorthodox box that is sexual realization? The questions sound so foreign even within the echo chamber of his mind.
He's in a dingy bar celebrating his best friend's birthday, this is not a time for the sexual exploration of his subconscious ( although he saves the thought because he considers if not now then when ). The drink is seeping within his clothes, it's going to stick if he doesn't move. He needs to fucking move.
And he does, swiftly pulling himself away from the chair and heading towards the bathroom. Wherever that is, Shirley said it was in the far back and Annie said fair left. Yet, she meticulous as ever so what if she always assume her left is everyone's true left and Shirley is vague with her directions but it doesn't even seem to be enjoying her time here at all.
He's not enjoying it either if he's honest. His loose shit now sticks to his chest and he knows it would make sopping sounds if the man's glass was any larger. Jeff brought them here to celebrate because they're all adults and Troy deserves to have a birthday party in style but if all Jeff and Britta do it bicker, doesn't that make them children themselves? And if he shares his companionship with them, does that make him and all the others children by association?
He's going nowhere with this train of though, this he knows but it can't ever seem to stop. His brain becomes a leaky faucet that can never be screwed back just right so it drips and drips just like the alcohol does along his jaw and lashes. Abed wants to go home but he's with his friends and it's his best friend's party and it'd be so rude of him to leave so soon. At least, that's what Annie tells him.
( Parties were far and few between when he was younger and even then, he cannot replace family functions for beings that truly care for him. )
But then he remembers you, nursing an iced tea in the corner because you are not interested in bestowing wisdom onto Troy that you do not have or participating in anybody's shenanigans. Bars are where people come to hook up or fuck up, you proclaimed on the car ride here, there's no in between.
Then he hears it, bursting against his ears as a smile splits across your face, a discotheque pop song that might be pleasant if it wasn't so overwhelming. His hand involuntarily taps against his thigh in tune with the rhythm. It helps sort out the sensations, the noise is different than the bland flavoring of water, and he knows what's what but it all feels the same in his mind.
Abed's eyelids shut, another involuntary tick he can never seem to shake, and his hand has created it's own beat. Rapid and rushed with no real rhyme or reason except for the fact that it's something that will tug his mind away from everything. ( It's the same thing he does when he's at the edge of a rollercoaster, it makes him safe. ) If everyone else can sway to a rhythm, why can't he?
"Hey," an unexpected voice softly call out to him ( tenderness within this group almost borders on unnatural ). Abed slowly opens his eyes to see you, you call out to him. He feels his hands move away from his pants, tangled within your fingers instead as you gaze at him with earnest. "five things you can see?"
Your hands feel polished, no—plush. He's afraid that if his thumbs press too hard, he'll begin to meld into your being. That's a great idea for a movie, he thinks and he knows you've been his muse from time to time. Maybe it means something, he's not willing to deep any deeper.
His eyes scan the room for a brief second before he rattles off, "The wooden floors, the bartender, the door, the chair behind you, and Annie still trying to be a Texan."
Her accent still lingers within her mind, poor acting for someone so involved a role they've assigned for themselves. The though nearly amuses him but he's getting off track, he needs to focus on you. On the way your hands gently rub over his knuckles and needs to ignore this growing pit within his stomach on whatever that insinuates.
"Four things you can feel?"
"My feet against my shoes, my jeans against my legs, how hot my ears are, your hands."
You don't let go even after he's mentioned it, instead he receives a squeeze that sounds throughout his body. A continuous cycle the runs on until you ask him for something he can taste, he doesn't know what lingers within the crevices of his mouth. ( He'd want it to be you and licks his lips without a second thought. ) Yet, settles on the answer Mint Julep.
Something about thinking this way must be wrong, he shouldn't want to keep holding your fingers or gaze into your fervent irises. He shouldn't be attracted to someone like you and shouldn't be searching for so many reason on why he has to tear himself away from your presence. Still, shouldn't doesn't stop him from doing so.
Maybe his hands have melted into yours, it'd be a good excuse on why he can't bring himself to let go. The song changes again, how long has he been in this small little world with you?
"Hey, it's Mazzy Star, this fucks so hard." he's heard of this before, maybe you've shared it with him. It's less grating on his ears, smooth melodies being shifted on strings, and he watches you sway from the corner of his eye.
( He likes to be watched but something about you commands all his attention. )
Still shifting from foot to foot, you turn to him with a far more lax expression. Both shifting into familiarity as you ask, "You wanna sit down?"
"Not really," he shoots back suddenly but you're not perturbed at his fast response reflex. However, his heart sinks as the next words tumble from his lips. "but we can stand here and sway?"
You don't pull your hand away from his, instead, pressing into his fingers as you ponder a reply. Perhaps you think this isn't real as much as he presumes you'll humiliate him for even asking. But you don't and another smile splits down your features, large than the last one he saw from across the room.
"Of course, Abed Nadir has a genius idea. Let's do it."
You don't move him from this space you've cultivated with him. Instead, wrapping arms around his neck as he places them on your waist ( he never went to prom but this is better than any teenage fantasy ). Moving side to side, never shifting around in a circle but rather awkwardly figuring out a steady pace while his stares becoming fonder while the night grows.
Abed still doesn't get the point of bars but he can figure it out the next time he's here with you.
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Just curious, how many shower thought (response) blogs are there? I just dived into this side of tumblr (not gonna make any posts its fun to read though) and I'm already losing my mind
Well there is
The. Literal. Sun.
Plasma...
S p a c e
ALL HAIL THE LIGHT
The void. It shall consume ALL.
A typewriter incase anyone wants to write their will before they die
Also some ink, not related to the typewriter
Also some words, I wonder who'll use them
A hat with no maker and a maker with no hat
The pen is mightier than the sword. It just so happens that this one is evil. Luckily I can summon multiple
Anyone order some coffee?
Ooo, an author
The literal embodiment if of fanart
A fork, nom noms
B҉ r҉ o҉ k҉ e҉ n҉ 
Soap
Soap(for hair)
Toothpaste
🄵🄰🅄🄲🄴🅃
Towel
Bath mat
Washcloth
Bathtub
Bathwater
𝔹𝕒𝕥𝕙𝕓𝕠𝕞𝕓
Bubblebath!
One (1) bath boi
Some M͓̽o͓̽l͓̽d͓̽ (anybody got some strong disinfectant?)
Nvm, the mold has already caused a plague (gettit?) (although user misspelled it)
Nevermind, there's already a parasite here
Mirror
Door!!!
Some curtains
A denim jacket
Blackout
Rainbow
✨ Magic ✨
*Tree poses to assert dominance*
Coconut
(obviously me)
I think popeye dropped a tin of spinch and it became sentient?
Tost
Hummus. dip tost?
Criss Cross applesauce
Wibbly wobbly Wibbly wobbly jellyo
Mmmm océan s o u p
Some poison, a great addition for my soup
Smol bean
Potat
Shower magpie who I haven't seen in a while
Bird (brain)
Frog(×2:Electric Boogaloo)
An axolotl!
Ferret
*looks at smudged writing on hand. Squints. * a raccoon
Stinky bastard man (I just had to put the two next to each other)
Rat.
Becometh crab 🦀 (x2: Electric Boogaloo)
Nya~
Edgy Nya~
Tripod of dog
Brain
Nina i found one of your neurons (if you understand this reference, good job you)
A rotted brain, keep it away before it infects us all, I only have 2 braincells left
Did... Did someone drop their spinal cord?
The almighty binch
The titanic
Narrator
Water based introspection
Existential crisis
Dumbass
Also a pacifier (get it because they're also called dummies and their name is dummy)
A foolish thought to say a sorry sight join the shower community (as you can tell we did Shakespeare in English so many times i pretty much can recite everything lady macbeth said)
ADHD
Ominous
Anonymous
Anxious 🥺👉👈
Some edgy bastard
A person of culture I see (although obsessed with tweed for some reason)
1 Dapper boi
Sarcastic
nice
All smiles and sunshine
HAPPY! (why isn't there yellow 😔)
Affection (Derogatory) (I'm sorry I just felt like it)
~Petty~
Idiot
Disaster
Chaos and Order
Comebacks
'vanishing'
Defences
Threatened
Op is on drugs
All the F s
And F-general
Get out of the shower
Shower responses
Dry
The horny and the simp
Shower sins
Thower shoughts
I take quick showers
Shower thots
Last responder *countdown music*
You have shower thoughts?
Your shower thoughts are stupid
Wtf shower thoughts
Another shower responder
MORE
Just shower responses... responses
Response shower
NO SHOWER! only thought (×3)
Mmm, showery
Penny for your thoughts?
Hello darkness my old friend...
Llawyer
Beepbeep
Prussia
Haywire!!!
furry OwO
A Pigeon got in through the door, who left it open?
I'm feeling devious
You're looking glamorous, let's get mischievous, and polyamorous
Gay is stored in the ass
Gay
Trans
*opens door and walks through with you exaggeratedly* Fellas we got the whole LGBTQIA+ community right here
Enby
Hahaha gender go brrr
Lesbian
Lesbian-thot
Lust
Someone who thinks it funny to clown around
Joker (derogatory)
Haha straight
Dead inside
Some supervillain idk
News. Literally a shower news style responses
r
I cannot believe that I forgot Her Greatest Majesty, the Queen. All Hail Royal
Isaac newton?
M megamind?
Fiftieth
Crackhead
Some Phoenix Wright kinnie
What is a Dean Winchester and why does he have a tentacle fetish?
Well well well, if it ain't a homestuckian
Did someone kill/rob The Doctor or something, their TARDIS was left behind and its blocking my pretzels that I left in the shower
Mined crafts uwu
Well well well, if it ain't- *accidentally makes eye contact and is then killed by some unknown shadowy creature holding what seems to be some sort of cube of dirt*
GOTTA GO FAST
Mishamishamishamishamishamishamisha
Gen Z and ready to throw hands with OP
Not puki
Nom noms
Dip dap
Kensa
B͓̽u͓̽n͓̽g͓̽e͓̽r͓̽ ..........
Someone broke their space bar or something
It's time to d-d-d-d-d-dshower
The magical deity of sleepovers
DON'T FALL ASLEEP. NO MATTER WHAT THEY TELL YOU-
The muffin man genuinely left drury Lane for this
Txmblr
Moonlit nights on a winters day, stars glimmering gently
A child?
🟥
The fae. Just all of them. Every single one.
Crocus? (What on earth does that mean)
*sings* baba blacksheep have you any wool? Because if not you will be killed (this fits the tune perfectly. If not I have failed in everything)
The theatre itself is here... Somehow
Ahoy-hoy
boo
REEEE- *epic geometry dash gameplay to DanTDM's old intro music*
Yardale, not to be mistaken for riverdale and differs to lawn ale or front porch ale or even meter ale
I'll finish this list later
It's gonna be a long one folks
I'm including a ones that haven't spoken since ages ago because
Boy howdy there's new ones tell me who I'm missing now
Please stop thank you very much this is too many i keep having to add to this any new responder must kill a responder to continue the purge shall claim y'all as I will win i recently started watching Danganronpa
Seriously though everyone after mirror must have a battle royale it's too much i doubt all of you will even last longer than today also happy birthday me -dated:28th- do you even realise what sort of commitment you've made to sell pieces of your soul for entertainment and ability to make such epic retorts each and every post?! I sacrifice many souls DAILY to be throwing such bangers into this stuff y'know?
We have a tap guys we can finally wash our hands of all the blood of our enemies
Seriously though who left the door open I don't want a Pigeon pecking at me (the mishapocalypse got them lol)
So many responders so little time before the end of the world
If I'm missing someone please tell me very thank
There are not enough colours for me to assign a different one to each person 😔 also, wtf is on there twice on purpose
WorldHealthOrganisation IS MISSING (note: you may have a joke in place of name or under a category of names)
So there's lore without me?
ALL HAIL THE LIGHT *moth noises*
Okay now there's alternate timeline versions of responders for the benefit of myself they ain't going on the list bud
There is an incorrect role play blog quotes blog and I am crying. Not of laughter. Just wiuwhdhsjhshjxjabjsjdhdjsj
If any new people join I will go back to causing shower wars for the sake of killing you all I'm done I have snapped my laptop is updating 3 times in a row
I will commit crimes.
Does being a shower responder or role-playing seem encouraging to people to join this "community"? Because I'm pretty sure it's the latter
659 notes · View notes
peggyrose19 · 3 years
Text
What Happens in Vegas Doesn’t Always Stay There
i was gonna do homework but i got inspired and wrote this instead. i also took a 90 minute nap at 6pm so now i’m bouncing off the walls and can’t actually make myself focus for longer than 30 seconds.....what was i saying? anyways this really got away from me wow. i have no regrets.
characters by @lumosinlove​
@im-oknutzy-trash, @wonder-womans-ex
cw: mentions of characters being drunk, swearing, idiot gays
Alex wasn’t sure how on earth they’d gotten on the topic of marriage. But conversations were always chaotic between the three of them so really he shouldn’t have been so surprised. Besides, if he was being honest with himself, he’d been thinking about it far more than he cared to admit.
He enjoyed the idea, the three of them being married. Making the commitment to each other. It wasn’t legal, but that didn’t matter. They could still be married in spirit. Maybe one day it would even happen.
“Y’know, Alex and I are married,” Kasey said casually, raising the bottle to his lips. Natalie gaped at him.
“You what?”
Alex laughed. “I forgot about that.”
Natalie glanced between the two of them quickly. “Please explain.”
With a laugh, Alex just shook his head. “We were playing Vegas in 2015, right after they legalized gay marriage, right? Both of us got shit-faced drunk and, in our drunken state, decided that getting married was an obviously very sound plan.”
“Yes, of course.”
“Well, after we had sobered up, we had kind of....forgotten it happened.”
“Then a few days later I was going through some pictures on my phone for whatever reason, and found one from that night, of the two of us holding a marriage certificate. Alex found it in his suitcase when we got home.”
Alex and Kasey both watched Natalie expectantly. For a long moment, she just stared at them in disbelief, mouth open almost comically wide. Then she burst out laughing.
“Oh my god,” she cackled. “I cannot believe you two.”
Kasey shrugged. “We never got around to getting it annulled. I suppose neither of us particularly wanted to. We could now, I guess. If you wanted us to.”
Nat’s laughter faded. “You don’t have to do that.”
“Well what about you?” Alex asked before Kasey could, as synced with him as he always had been.
“What about me? I don’t need a piece of paper to say I’m in love with you two, not to mention it’s impossible anyways. One day we can have a ceremony with our family and friends and it’ll be dramatic and over-the-top, but for right now? I don’t need anything else.”
Alex very nearly melted at that. He glanced over at Kasey, unreadable to most everyone else, who was smiling that half smile Alex loved so much.
“You wanna get married someday?” he asked quietly.
“Hell yeah, I do.”
~
Alex had never spent a whole lot of time with Sirius Black. He was a bit of an enigma to him, someone so well-known in the media but so secretive in real life. These days, everyone knew Sirius as the first gay NHL player, and the first player to be married to his own teammate. Alex had gotten to know him as Kasey’s teammate, as a good player and captain. So when he found himself beside Sirius and Remus in a crowded bar, he wasn’t entirely sure what to say to the two of them. He could have gone and joined Kasey and Natalie, somewhere on the dance floor together, but he had never been one for public dancing.
“So. How does it feel to be married?” he asked the pair, who immediately glanced at each other and grinned sappily.
“Really good, man,” Sirius replied, not-so-subtly grabbing Remus’ hand. Alex smiled at the gesture. “And being on the same team is great, I mean we get to see each other so much more now.”
“Yeah, it’s cool,” Alex replied unthinkingly, remembering playing with Kasey even before they were together and relishing in the closeness it brought, the long hours they spent together both on and off the ice. He’d missed having that recently.
“What?”
Alex burst out laughing before he could stop himself, receiving a confused look from Remus and a glare from Sirius.
“You good?” Remus asked warily.
“Fine, fine.”
“What d’you mean ‘it’s cool’?” Sirius asked, eyeing him suspiciously.
“Ah jeez.” Alex shook his head at himself. “Well, might as well get this over with.”
“Get what over with? Alex what the hell are you talking about?” Sirius looked bewildered, watching him with equal parts suspicion and confusion. Remus too was frowning, but there was a knowing look in his eye, as if he was starting to catch on.
He sighed heavily. “It’s possible Kasey and I got married like, six years ago.”
“What.”
“Yeah. Back when we were on the Rangers together, we were playing Vegas when gay marriage was legalized. And the two of us got shit-faced drunk and decided getting married was a good idea. Then we promptly forgot about it in the morning and once we finally remembered, never actually bothered to annul it. So. We’re still married. Technically. According to the state of Nevada.”
Sirius and Remus both stared at him, expressions strikingly similar to Natalie’s. Alex eyed them warily, unsure what was going to happen now.
“You mean we’re not the first NHL players to marry each other?” Sirius asked, and he seemed so genuinely disappointed Alex had to fight back a laugh.
“Uh, I guess not?”
“Merde,” Sirius swore. Remus just looked at him.
“Does that really matter?” he asked amusedly.
“Of course it matters! We’re the first, Remus! This is a very important development.”
“Okay,” Remus laughed, nodding along. “Whatever you say.”
Sirius just grumbled under his breath.
~
“Hey Harz, how attached are you to your brother exactly?” Sirius asked at practice the next day, and Kasey glanced over at him. Alex had filled him and Natalie on their conversation the night before, and Sirius’ newfound knowledge was not likely to lead to anything good.
Finn frowned. “He’s alright. Why, what’d he do?“
“Got married, the little fucker.”
Finn dropped the jersey he’d been holding. “What, he’s married? Since when?!”
“Did Nat finally propose?” James piped up.
“He’s not married to Nat,” Sirius said.
If possible, Finn looked even more confused. “He’s not married to Nat?”
“No he’s fucking married to Winters.”
Finn just gaped at Sirius. James looked positively delighted. “What- our Winter?” he asked. “Like, Kasey Winters... the Lions goalie?”
“Standing right here,” Kasey added. He fought a smile.
Finn glared at him. “Explain yourself right now.”
Kasey squirmed a little under the sudden attention, but he couldn’t fight a laugh. Of course this was how they were all going to find out.
He sighed. “Long story short, Alex and I got ridiculously drunk one night in Vegas and decided to get married for shits and giggles, and then we never did anything about it.”
“What the fuck.” Finn was the first to break the silence. “What the fuck what the fuck.” He grabbed his phone from his stall and opened it, aggressively tapping at the screen. “Alex!” he very nearly shouted into his phone. Kasey could hear his bright laughter through the phone. “What the fuck?”
“Don’t bug him, Finn,” Kasey tried, but the red-head would hear nothing of it.
“Alex O’Hara, you get your ass down here now,” Finn demanded into the phone, and then promptly hung up. Kasey just shook his head and went back to getting dressed. A few moments later, the locker room door squeaked open and Alex stood before the team, wearing his Winters jersey and fighting a smirk.
“Something wrong Finn?” he asked with feigned innocence.
“Yes, you little shit. Sirius said you’re married? To Kasey?”
Alex’s eyes danced. “It’s possible.”
Finn’s eyes narrowed. “Prove it.”
“Finn how the fuck do you propose I do that?”
He jerked his head towards Kasey. “Kiss him.”
Alex frowned. “Dude, we’re literally together, you know this.”
But Finn’s jaw was set stubbornly, and Kasey knew that look never meant anything good. So Alex sighed good-naturedly and crossed the room to Kasey, stopping in front of him.
“Okay?” he asked quietly, meant only for Kasey’s ears. He nodded minutely.
Alex smiled softly, then leaned forward and captured his lips in a gentle kiss, one hand coming to rest on the small of Kasey’s back, the other cupping his cheek. After a moment he pulled away and looked expectantly back at Finn, staring at the two of them with a mixture of shock and approval.
“Satisfied?” Alex asked smugly, staying tucked against Kasey’s side. Kasey would never admit it, and certainly not in front of the team, but he rather enjoyed having Alex here, feeling his warmth even through the pads, knowing he’d later be watching the game and cheering him on.
“Fine,” Finn grumbled. “But I still can’t believe you kept that a secret.”
Conflicting emotions crossed Alex’s face, there and then gone, invisible unless one knew to look. Kasey knew the unintentional pain Finn’s words had on his brother, and knew Alex was far too polite to get into it with Finn right then.
“Talk to him later, baby,” Kasey whispered to Alex, hiding it by pressing a kiss to his cheek. “It’ll be okay.”
Alex nodded, hiding the pain with a good-natured smile. But he stayed pressed against Kasey, and that told him all he needed to know.
~
“Hey Finn!” Alex called out, jogging down the hallway to catch his brother, leaving with Leo and Logan.
“Yeah, what’s up?” he asked distractedly, still glancing down at his phone.
“I need to borrow you for a moment.” Finn looked up at him, eyes narrowing, before murmuring something to his boys. They both nodded and kissed him before continuing on towards the exit.
“What’s up?” Finn asked, clicking his phone off and sliding it into his pocket.
“I um...” Alex trailed off, finding himself suddenly without words, despite thinking over what he wanted to say earlier. “Just wanted to talk.”
“If this is about before, you don’t have to worry about it,” Finn interrupted gently before Alex could continue. “It’s okay. I get why you kept it a secret.”
Alex released a breath and stared at his little brother. He felt like he was just now seeing him for the first time, and seeing the man he had become in the past few years. He’d never noticed before, the understanding and kindness behind Finn’s lighthearted gaze.
“How did you know?”
Finn shrugged. “You’re easy to read.”
~
When Alex got home, he found Natalie watching television on the couch, Kasey seemingly asleep on her lap. She smiled when he appeared in the doorway, beckoning him over silently.
“You talk to Finn?” she asked silently as he slid in on her other side. She let him lean into her, tossing the blanket over him as well.
“Yeah.”
“And?”
Alex shrugged. “He was... surprisingly understanding about the whole thing. I didn’t even have to say anything. He just seemed to know.”
“Yeah, he’s like that sometimes,” Kasey mumbled, and Alex jumped a little.
“Hey, you’re awake.” Kasey didn’t bother sitting up, but he opened his eyes and looked blearily up at the two of them.
“Yeah. Was just resting.”
The three of them fell silent then, letting the comfortable silence settle over them.
“Hey Nat?” Alex broke the silence after a while.
“What’s up?”
“Were you serious about the whole marriage thing? Do you really want to get married at some point? Like, not married married. But, you know.”
“Yeah, I do,” she replied sincerely. “Maybe not yet. I don’t think we’re ready for that yet. But at some point.”
“I’d really like that,” Kasey said quietly.
“Me too.”
She smiled. “We should go to Vegas. Bring the whole thing full circle, y’know?”
Kasey huffed a laugh, “Whatever you want.”
126 notes · View notes
heyyyharry · 4 years
Text
She Likes Girls
(a blurb from the Flatmate series)
…in which Harry's favourite cousin, who’s a lesbian, comes visit and spends a lot of time with Y/N.
Tumblr media
Word count: 3.2k
Someone requested ANOTHER jealous flatmate Harry blurb so I decided to write it a bit different this time ;)
.
.
.
“Hi, um, does Harry live here?”
“Yes,” Y/N said, holding the door open just wide enough to show her face. The purple-haired girl she’d never met before broke into a smile and politely extended her hand. “I’m here to see him. You must be his flatmate. I’m Millie.”
“I’m Y/N.” Y/N smiled back, giving the girl’s hand a hesitant shake. She’d never seen Harry with this girl before, but the girl looked nice enough to not be a serial killer. “He’s at the library,” she told Millie. “He’ll probably be back soon. Would you like to wait inside?”
“Sure. That’d be great,” Millie said, smiling again.
Y/N pulled the door open and stepped aside for the girl to enter. Personally, Y/N would hate it when someone she’d just met would eye her up and down, but that was exactly what she was doing to Millie. She wasn’t trying to be rude. Millie was really pretty. She just didn’t look like the girls Harry would hook up with. Y/N couldn’t imagine Harry with a goth girl.
Millie placed her bag by the couch as she sat there and looked around the living room. Y/N thought of making tea for her but then she remembered that they were out of tea. She couldn't just leave Millie here and retreat to her room. So she thought she should start a conversation. She wasn’t good at conversations, but she could try.
“So how did you meet Harry?” she asked and sat down beside Millie.
“I’ve known him my whole life,” Millie said.
Y/N hadn’t expected that. “Oh...so your families are close?”
“Very.”
“Oh.”
Harry had never mentioned having a beautiful childhood best friend before. Y/N knew he didn’t have to tell her everything about himself, but why did she feel so betrayed?
Before she could come up with something else to talk about that wasn’t Harry-related, the door swung open and Harry froze in the doorway, his eyes lit up as he saw Millie.
“Mil!”
“Hazza!”
Millie launched herself out of the couch and threw her arms around Harry’s neck. Harry caught her and lifted her feet off her ground. Meanwhile, Y/N was just standing there and rubbing her hands against her jeans.
Well, this is awkward.
“I told you I’d pick you up at the airport!” Harry said, putting the girl down and cupping her face.
Millie brushed his hands off as she snorted. “Well, I got here early to surprise you.”
Watching Harry laugh and ruffle Millie’s hair, Y/N had never felt more like a third-wheel. She would go if her anxiety hadn’t glued her feet to the floor.
“How long are you staying?” Harry asked.
“A week,” Millie said.
“Yessss!” Harry punched the air, then finally noticed Y/N standing awkwardly behind Millie. He smiled and wrapped an arm around Millie’s neck, gesturing to Y/N. “Oh, I see that you’ve met Y/N.”
“Yes, she was very nice to me,” Millie said. “And you never told me that your flatmate was so pretty.”
Y/N let out a nervous laugh. “Thank y—”
“Stop,” Harry cut her off, his smile vanished as he shot Millie a glare.
“What?” Millie looked just as confused, but something about her wide-eyed expression told Y/N that she was faking it.
Harry turned back to Y/N. “Was this one flirting with you?”
“What?”
He sighed and rolled his eyes. “Millie always does that. She cannot help herself.”
“I learned from the best,” Millie said, smirking.
It took Y/N a second to understand. She pointed to Millie, her eyes round and her mouth wide open. “So Millie is...”
“My cousin,” Harry said.
“And a lesbian,” Mille added as she pat Harry on the shoulder. “Even if I were into boys and not his cousin, I still wouldn’t want him. I’ve got standards.”
“Hey!” cried Harry yet Millie ignored him.
“He’s jealous because I get more girls,” she said.
“Lies!” Harry hissed and told Y/N, “Don’t believe anything she tells you about me.”
“I’m so sorry,” Y/N uttered. “I thought—”
“It’s okay,” Millie cut her off, giving her a gentle smile. “I know my cousin. He’s got quite a reputation around here. I could hear a girl crying and cursing his name the second I landed in London.”
Y/N giggled as Harry rolled his eyes. “Just don’t flirt with my flatmate while you’re here.”
“Oh, she wasn’t...flirting with me,” Y/N said.
Millie tilted her head, her green eyes narrowed as her black lips stretched to its favoured side. “You didn’t know I was flirting? Man, I must try harder next time.”
Y/N stiffened. She could feel the colour heightened in her cheeks.
“Stop teasing her. Damn it,” Harry told Millie. To Y/N, he said, “She was joking.”
“I’m sorry! Gosh, you’re blushing!” Millie cupped Y/N’s face as she burst out laughing. “You’re so cute. How can someone like you live with him?”
“I ask myself that question every day,” Y/N mumbled, feeling quite proud when Millie laughed even harder. She liked making people laugh, especially people who seemed much cooler than she was; it made her feel validated somehow.
“So where do I sleep?” Millie asked Harry, putting an arm around Y/N’s shoulders. Harry immediately plucked that arm off and pushed Millie aside to stand between them. “On the couch,” he said. “Or on the floor in my room.”
“You're such a dick,” Millie scoffed.
“You could sleep with me. We could share my bed,” Y/N said.
Both Millie and Harry whipped their heads to her but only Millie’s face brightened with a smile. “Oh, thank you, I–”
“You know what?” Harry blocked Millie with his outstretched arm before she could pull Y/N into a hug. “Take my bed. I’ll sleep on the floor.”
Millie raised an eyebrow at him, a corner of her mouth quirked and she tiptoed to stroke the top of his head. “Now that’s my good baby cousin.” Then she picked up her bag, flipped her black hair over her shoulder and sauntered to Harry’s room.
Harry turned to Y/N and gave a tight smile. “You don’t mind her staying, right?”
“Of course not,” Y/N giggled. “I like her.”
Harry arched both eyebrows, looking genuinely concerned. “But not too much.”
“No, no, not like that!” Y/N shook her head fast. “She’s just really cool. And...um...cool people don’t usually like me. So…”
Harry pressed his lips into a small smile. For a second, Y/N thought he looked rather relieved. “If she annoys you with all the flirting and her bad jokes,” he said, “just tell her to stop. Don’t be nice about it.”
Y/N squinted her eyes. “So she’s the female version of you.”
“Yes. Only better,” Harry chuckled. “That’s why she’s my favourite cousin.”
.
.
.
“Remember when I said Millie was my favourite cousin?”
“Yeah, why?” Niall shouted over the music. Harry leaned against the wall. With a constipated look on his face, he watched Millie dance with Y/N from across the room.
“She’s not anymore,” he mumbled spitefully.
Niall stopped dancing and raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Who’s your favourite cousin then?”
“Jared.”
“Didn’t you say Jared helped Mason drown you?”
Harry threw his arms in the air. “So I don’t have a favourite cousin! Jesus, Niall, that’s not the point. The point is–”
Niall stared as he waited for Harry to finish the sentence. “The point is what?”
Harry’s mouth was open, but he saw Millie put an arm around Y/N’s neck and kiss her cheek as they took a selfie, and he suddenly forgot what the point was.
Niall gave his shoulder a gentle push so he snapped out of it, heaved a sigh and pinched the bridge of his nose. “Never mind. I’ve been having a bad week since she arrived.”
“But you were so excited to see her. You told me you’d had plans for both of you to spend time together.”
Harry lifted his shoulder and forced his attention to stay on Niall and not Millie and Y/N. “I did, but she doesn’t want to hang out with me.” Y/N didn’t either. “She’s spent every second in our flat doing girls stuff with Y/N. They’re attached at the hips now. Last night they stayed up until 3 AM to gossip. The walls are thin, you know? They’re messing up my sleep schedule.”
Niall was quiet for a moment before he said, “Do you think…”
“What?” Harry snapped.
Niall pursed his lips and shrugged. “I don’t know...Maybe...Y/N likes girls?”
“No, Niall. Y/N doesn’t like girls,” Harry said bitterly even though he’d been worried about that as well. The problem wasn’t that Y/N might be into girls. Harry didn’t care about that. It was the fact that Millie had never failed to get the girls she wanted. The only thing that Harry had that she didn’t was commitment issues. Millie’s last relationship had lasted a year.
It was bad enough that Harry had to fight off the other guys who wanted Y/N and might actually deserve her. He didn’t want to have to do that with his girl cousin!
“Y/N doesn’t like Millie like that, okay?” he repeated to Niall, frowning as he saw Millie and Y/N laughing again.
“Harry!” Layla’s voice brought him back to reality. He shot his head up to see her shouldering her way toward him and Niall. “You didn’t tell me your crush was gay! Niall, did you film him crying in the bathroom?”
Harry facepalmed himself as Niall said, “Told ya.” and gave him a shrug.
Later that night, as they walked home together from the party, Harry purposely stayed silent so that the girls would know he was mad at them. He had no right to be mad at either of them, but he felt like he should be mad if that was the only way to get their attention. Y/N was his flatmate, and Millie was his cousin. But now they were walking ahead, arms around each other and completely not noticing how upset he was. He told himself it was only because they were a bit tipsy. But he hated being left out.
“I’m going to sleep early,” he announced the second they entered the flat.
“Okay,” Y/N said.
“I’m really tired,” he added to drop a hint so she’d know he was upset.
“So am I,” she said, yawning and stretching her arms.
He was trying to think of something else to say that’d get her attention when Millie interjected, “Wanna sheet mask before bed?”
“Yes!” Y/N exclaimed. Then they hurried into Y/N’s room, leaving Harry standing there like a scarecrow in his own flat.
“I’ve got my own masks. Thanks for asking,” he muttered bitterly to himself, rolling his eyes and trudging to his room.
And so Harry decided to go to sleep early. He spent the first thirty minutes on the mattress by his bed, rolling from side to side, trying not to think about the two of them until he nodded off. When he woke up, it was three in the morning. The flat was so quiet and his bed was still empty.
Where was Millie?
He tried to listen through the wall to see if the girls were still awake, but there was no sound.
Annoyed, sleepy, and sad, he forced himself to get up and go to Y/N’s room to tell Millie that she must let Y/N sleep. When he got there, he found that the door was left open. The girls were fast asleep on the bed. And Millie was spooning Y/N.
.
.
.
“You look like shit. Didn't you sleep at all?” was the first thing Millie said to Harry as he entered the kitchen the next morning.
He pretended like he hadn’t heard it and angrily marched toward the table, when all he wanted to say was, “And you look overly happy after sleeping in the same bed with my girl.” It sounded way too petty, but he was exhausted and not in the mood to feel guilty about it.
As he buried his head in his hands, Millie placed a cup of black coffee down in front of him. He looked up and caught her grinning.
“One cup of black coffee every Monday morning,” she said.
He blinked, confused and a bit surprised. “I don’t remember telling you that.”
“You didn’t. Y/N did.” To his astonishment, she added, “I’ve learned more about you in the last couple of days from her than I have by knowing you my whole life.”
This caught Harry off guard. He found himself sitting rigid in his seat. He was probably gaping at his cousin, because she tossed her head back and laughed and pulled up a chair to sit down beside him. “That’s all she does,” Millie said.
Harry scrunched up his face. “What?”
“Y/N. She always talks about you,” Millie giggled.
Harry tried not to react, but when he spoke, his voice wavered as if he couldn’t breathe properly. “S-She talks about me? What has she told you?”
“Surprisingly, only good things,” Millie said. “Like, we would do something like listen to music and she’d randomly say, ‘Harry likes this song.” Or we would be wandering around the mall and she’d see a shirt and tell me, ‘Harry would love that shirt but he hates it when people buy him clothes so I can’t buy it for him.” And just yesterday’s morning, she saw me making coffee and told me you’d always drink black coffee on Monday morning and only on Monday morning.” Millie chuckled as she rolled her eyes. “I thought hearing so much about you would annoy me. But I actually find it super cute that she cares so much about you to notice every one of those annoying little details.”
Harry felt his cheeks growing hot. His silence was the confession Millie had been waiting for. She smacked him on the arm as laughter crackled out of her. “You’re blushing! Oh my God, you have a crush on her!”
“I do not!” he retorted.
“You do!” She slammed her fist on the table, smiling with her mouth open. “And you thought I had a thing for her, didn’t you?! You were cranky last night because you were jealous!”
“Not true!” Harry gasped and quickly got up. Millie jumped in his way, not letting him off the hook so easily. “Admit it!”
“There’s nothing to admit.”
He attempted to sidestep her yet she was quicker. She folded her arms and leaned a shoulder against the kitchen doorway. “I know that face, Hazza. You made the same face when we were kids and found a lost puppy in the park and the puppy grew more attached to me.”
Harry pointed to himself. “I found the puppy okay? The puppy was mine first.”
"You petty little shit!" Millie’s jaw dropped, then she poked at the left side of his chest. “I didn’t know this thing worked. Wow, a miracle named Y/N!”
Harry smirked and brushed her finger off. “Very funny, Mil.”
“It sure the fuck is. I can’t believe you thought I was into her. One look at Y/N and I knew she wasn’t gay. My gaydar is never wrong.”
“Good to know,” Harry said flatly. “Now can I please get out of this kitchen?”
Millie ignored his question as she eyed him up and down and chewed the inside of her cheek to suppress a smirk. “You two are in love with each other.”
“No, we’re not. We’re friends,” Harry said, raising an eyebrow. “And I was only mad because you came here to see me but spent all your time with her.”
“Oh, please. Do not make this about me. You’re so in love with her it’s embarrassing.”
“In love with who?”
Harry almost screamed when Y/N appeared in the doorway. Somehow he managed to keep his calm and force a laugh. “Jennifer Aniston! Beautiful, beautiful woman!"
Y/N looked at him funny, probably assuming he was high on caffeine. Out of the corner of his eye, he could see Millie fighting the urge to expose him.
“I’m going out now,” she said to his relief. “Gonna meet up with some old friends today. You kids have a great day.” Backing out of the door, she did the finger-guns and winked at him. “We’ll talk more about Jennifer Aniston when I get back.”
“No, we won’t!” he shouted after her.
Once his cousin was gone, Harry felt as if a weight had been lifted from his chest. Y/N didn’t seem to suspect a thing. She tiptoed to get a cereal box from the cabinet while humming a song she’d been listening to on repeat for the last few days.
Yes, she wasn’t the only one paying attention.
He squared his shoulders, took a deep breath and padded to her side. “Hey, Y/N.” When she turned around and smiled at him, he almost forgot what to say. “I-I um...I was thinking of buying a new shirt, and um...I was wondering if you could go with me, to help me pick one.”
Y/N suddenly broke into a huge grin. “Yes! I know this shop–” she blurted but then her mouth snapped shut and she lowered her voice. “I mean, yeah, sure, I know a shop...I think...But didn’t you say you preferred going shopping alone?”
Harry gave a half-shrug. “It’s getting boring. Doing things alone, I mean...”
Her lips curved into a cute little smile. “Let’s go this afternoon,” she said. “I feel like we haven’t hung out in days. You were always busy.”
Harry was taken aback. He pointed to his face. “Me? Busy?”
“Yeah, well, you seemed...not yourself. I thought you were stressed out about an exam.”
“No, not at all,” he mumbled, turning his face to hide his blushing.
She giggled softly. “Okay. So...it’s a date?”
“Yeah. A date.” He cleared his throat. “I mean, yeah, cool.”
“Cool,” she echoed.
Harry nodded once then grabbed his coffee and sauntered out of the kitchen before he could embarrass himself again. Suddenly, his phone chimed with a new text and he pulled it out of his pocket to see that it was from Louis.
Hey, Niall told me. I found this article that might be helpful. Stay strong!
Then a link to: “How to deal with depression when your crush turns out to be gay.”
Harry threw his head back and exhaled.
He was going to murder Niall.
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tipsylorie · 3 years
Text
Dream Project Pt. 3 {title in progress}
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3
A/N: Hola everyone, here is part 3 but not yet proof-read. I hope you will like it nevertheless...
Word Count: 2.7K
THE NEXT DAY
Liviana drove herself to office due to the driver’s message early in the morning that says he will be late because of an emergency. Upon arriving the buildings parking lot, instead of her driver, it was her assistant who was waiting with a worried look.
“Why the long face baby boy?” This is the thought that has been running through Liv’s mind when she saw her assistant, and this made her laugh. It took a while for her to compose herself so with a long face, she just remarks as she exits the car, “Why the sad face Jer?”
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“Why are you laughing though?” Jayceon asked with a growing grin, but Liv just dismissed it by saying ‘nothing’. So he continues to inform his boss, “It turns out that your driver for today had to rush her wife to hospital earlier so there won’t be anyone to drive you.”
“This won’t do, I have to get these cakes delivered and to check the situation in Paradigmia.” Liv said with worry written all over her face but then she suddenly smiles, “You do have a license, right?” She asked the young man who responses with a nod. “Then you’ll drive. I just have to get some materials in my office.”
Jayceon sees Liviana walking towards the car and anxious on how his driving should be. Because the only one who he was able to drive are his friends. Heck, his parents don’t even know that he can since he has always been provided with a driver and an assistant. It didn’t help either when Liv chose to seat beside him after she arranged the materials and cakes at the back seat. “Why are you sitting here instead of over there?” Jayceon nervously asked as he points to the back seat diagonal to the driver’s seat as where bosses should sit according to some according to etiquette.
“Well, I am not really used to passenger seat being vacant. Don’t worry Jer, this is perfectly normal and please just treat me more as your friend instead of your boss. It will be more comfortable that way.” Liv informed her assistant.
Jayceon smiles as he was happy hearing how humble his business partner is, so he proceeded saying, “Ok then Liv, buckle up and enjoy the ride!”
It was an internal chaos in Jayceons mind since he doesn’t really want to go to his habit of over speeding and to scare Liviana however his childhood acting lessons had paid off since he was able to act composed and relaxed while he’s driving his temporary boss. Okay, so if you’re wondering about Jayce’s early life, his mother well like all Asian mothers are, enrolled him in all extracurricular activities she could come across. Therefore, ever since in the age of 4 he had already experienced EVERYTHING, from sports to performing arts.
Upon arriving to the Academy’s main branch, Liv immediately went to her friend Anne’s office. “Annie! Been so long, I made you some cupcakes!” She enthusiastically greeted her friend.
Anne was a little bit puzzled by the sudden visit, “What’s up? Why the cupcakes?” She asked. However, Liv just gave her a questioning look as a response and it only dawned on her that it was their friend’s birthday. So, the look at her face was so funny as if she experienced horror while saying, “OH MY GOSH! How could I forget?”
“Don’t worry Anne. Just message her later or maybe give her a visit after your working hours. It’s just a 30-minute ride so… It’s up to you.”
“Well, if it is up to me, I will just take a half day off and go to her but yeah cannot do that because my boss would be mad.”
“Ha, I know what you’re trying to do, well just so y’know as your boss I would totally not mind however I know how keen you are with your work so I reckon that you will finish today’s job and just go to her later after working hours.” Liv said the last words with a tap on Anne’s shoulder then left her office.
As they left, Anne just snickered on how her long-time friend never failed to read her like an open book.
*
On their way to Paradigmia, they stopped at a gas station since Jayceon found the need to pee. So Liviana just waited in the car. Jayce always has the impulse to buy something since he finds this satisfying. When he was about to pay, only then he realised that he left his wallet in the car’s compartment that is in between the driver’s seat and passenger seat. So, he hurriedly opened Liv’s door side in a rush, and tried to open the compartment and reached it and however this fell on the backside and without thinking Jayce climbed on top of Liv and once he reached his wallet he exclaimed, “Yes! Finally got it!”
This woke Liv up and her eyes widened in surprise. Jayceon just froze and stared to her eyes, and he had the urge to gulp just to somehow slow the rapid beating of his heart. To snap him back to reality, Liv asked, “What are you doing?” in a concerned voice and was trying hard not to jump to conclusion since as far as she knows, the guy in front of her was gay.
Jayce or in Liv’s perspective, Jer stepped back to not cause any alarm and calmly said, “I was just trying to reach for my wallet,” showed the wallet in his hand, “because I have items waiting in the counter of that 7-Eleven.”  He pointed to the convenience store in the side of the car.
“Oh okay, but you know you could’ve used the other door, right?” Liv asked genuinely.
“I didn’t think of that earlier since I was in a rush. I am so sorry about that.” Jayce apologised. “I promise it won’t happened ever again!” He subconsciously emphasised as his eyes asked for forgiveness.
In Liv’s perspective, she cannot stay mad to this adorable guy in front of her. “Fine, just never ever do that again to me or to anyone ever again.” She informed her employee.
“Pinky swear! Brb just gonna pay for those food! Thank you, Liv!”
As Jayce ran back to the convenience store, Liv thought it was really odd for Jer to stare at her like that. However, she just dismisses this immediately and went back to her nap since she knows it will be a long day in Paradigmia.
“Hey,” Jayce said as he tapped Liv’s shoulder when he sat at the driver’s seat. “You want some peanuts? It’ll help to lessen your sleeping.”
Liv slowly opened her eyes and looked at the bag of peanut he was holding, “Yes, that would be great.”
As Jayce prepped himself to drive, he asked a last question, “What did you do last night that made you this tired today?”
“Well obviously the cake made me use all my remaining energy last night. I don’t know maybe I had a tiring dream.”
“You also believe that? Despite not remembering the dream?” He asked and she just nodded with a faint smile as a response. “So glad that I am not the only one.”
After few more minutes they finally arrived to the apartment of Julie. Liv asked Jayceon to grab the balloons she prepared at the backseat. “You had balloons? Why haven’t I seen it?” He asked in amusement. “Well, maybe I unintentionally intentionally hid it?” This just made the pair chuckle as the guy grabbed the balloons, the lady handled the cakes.
“After centuries you’re finally here!” Liv’s best friend, Julie exclaimed as she hugged her while holding the cakes.
“Careful! My masterpiece!” Liv yelled.
“Sorry but that will not even last a day in this household.” Julie rebuked. This resulted to the three of them laughing.
“Did Anne tell you she’ll be here later?” Liv asked her good friend.
“Yeah, she felt so guilty of almost forgetting and thanked God when you thought of leaving some of your wonderful cupcakes in her office and she has time to prepare.” Julie nonchalantly informed Liv.
“So, what do you prefer, stay here while we wait for her or let’s head now to the hotel I already booked for tonight?” Liv asked.
Julie replied after some thinking, “Well, I think my family will still visit here shortly to give cakes and such, so maybe wait for Anne in here.”
With Julie’s response, Liv faced her assistant and informed him, “So, if you want to take a rest you can go to the hotel first. I am sending you know the voucher for your room, and by just showing this to the reception, I think you’ll be assisted to your room immediately. Just leave the car and keys since we really do not plan to get wasted so I’ll just drive us there and I’ll just let you know once we arrived there. Is that okay?”
As Liviana is explaining her proposition, Jayceon cannot help but take notice on how she always has the tendency to worry about everyone around her ergo, planning everything tediously beforehand. He admires this but at the same time feel sorry for her since she has the kind of person who loves to smile despite the truth that deep inside, she is already drowning. He can see this because she tries so hard every single time as if it is always her life on the line. He wishes that somehow he can help her to loosen up a bit and be true of what she truly feels. (A/N: Jayceon has taken a lot of Psychology modules in undergrad as a hobby that made him enjoy analysing human behaviour and Liviana has been one of the most interesting person he has met.)  So after listening to Liv, he answered, “Yep, sure thing! That all sound great! So I guess, see you tomorrow?”
“Yes, Jer see ya! Thank you for the help. Ooh I almost forgot, I also set aside these cupcakes for you.” Liviana said as she gave the 3 pieces cupcakes in a sealed tray.
“Thank you Liv! Really appreciate it! Bye!” He remarked as he waved goodbye then got inside the taxi they messaged.
~Jayceon in the hotel~
Jayceon went to the counter which the receptionist immediately recognised him as his family being the co-owner of the hotel. In which he was greeted immediately with a bow and for the employee to immediately ring for the Executive Manager. Jayce then quickly tried to explain his stuation in the most discreet way possible. Telling him to stop his manager from coming because most probably him having prior commitments with his work. He just asked for the receptionist to give him the room stated in the voucher and instead to have Liviana Voss in the most expensive room available during her stay and charge her with only the amount the room she booked. So just like that, Jayce had his staff to put Liv in the Premium Suite Penthouse which is technically a room with rooms and a second floor that has a direct access to the rooftop.
Jayce was pretty proud with what he did especially on how smart he think it was. To have Liviana be one of the lucky winners in an online booking event that never existed. After feeling content, he took a nap to make sure he will not miss any updates from his “boss”. But didn’t miss the beat to take a taste of the cupcake after dinner. He can surely tell that it was made with love.
~Meanwhile in Julie’s Household~
“So, who was that guy? He looks so good! Do you have a thing with him?” Julie prompted with the question she has been holding until that guy left.
Liv answered with a grin, “I knew it! I can already sense your questions like once we both entered your house. And the answers would be: first us my assistant; second, yep he is but not interested with girls; and finally, I think no?”
“Omg, you do have! Spill!” Julie enthusiastically ordered.
“But it is your birthday! Why talk about me? We need to focus on you getting older!” Liv claimed.
Julie tried to explain, “Still, I am the birthday girl, so you need to let me use my power card for today of you to just share about this matter, please?”
“Fine! I love you so much that is why I am letting you use the card.” Liv gave in.
Julie was delighted with this by saying, “YAYYYY! BEST BDAY because of the BEST TEA!” But then suddenly interrupted with her family entering the house with their spare key. This made Liviana laugh so much that Julie’s family can see her almost rolling off the ground literally but thankfully she was able to stop herself. Julie’s family only stayed for like 2 hours since they also have some stuff already planned.
Once they left, Liv and Julie cleaned a little bit and wash the little number of dishes. Just right after they finished, Anne already arrived, and this made Julie happier since Liv can share the tea to the both of them at the same time. Liv’s narration went like this:
“Well, I was taking a nap since I was really exhausted with the baking and decorating so I really do hope you guys will love and like it. So, while napping I can feel that something is different, and I can see him staring at me adoringly? I guess, it was really weird because I felt something. It also feels like an eternity and still his position being on top of me didn’t change and remind you that the seat was declined so it was really awkward and I can also see his change in demeanour of somewhat being manly like more than so he normally is and he also gulped that really sent shivers to my spine. Just overall – WEIRD.”
Julie and Anne just looked at each other because they have the same idea. So Julie slowly proposed their idea, “Liviana, don’t you think it is time to consider that he is not gay? As we both can already sense with the vibes whenever the two of you are in a room, you guys act like high schoolers interacting with their first love like that is literally the aura the two of accentuates.”
Anne added, “Also this is nothing like the chemistry thingy back when we tried to ship you with someone in junior high instead this thingy right now is something that everyone can call sincere and genuine.”
Liv was really quiet with the insights her friends are telling her but all she managed to reply is a joke, “Okay guys, you two could really write a million-seller fiction right now.”
Anne just retorted as she and Julie are already used to their friend always being in denial which is the total hundred percent reason why she still never had any boyfriend, “Whatever Liv, just don’t tell us we didn’t inform you. I know that you know that there is a possibility with what Julie and I are saying. So please, don’t resist it anymore because you also need to find a partner too at some point.”
“Wow, our youngest just scolded me. Yes Ms. Annie, will do. So can we now finally celebrate Julie’s birthday?” Liv asked warily.
“YAYY!” The two girls exclaimed, and Julie shouted, “Movies and cupcakes!”
“Speaking of cupcakes, where did you put the cupcakes, I gave you Anne?” Liv asked.
Anne replied, “I have the half of them in my house and left some to my mother’s because you know how much she loves your cooking and baking!”
Liv responded, “Yes of course, I am glad she still does.” She asked, “Julie, what movie do you want?”
“Ugh please, let’s not do that, we will spend like an hour just looking for a movie, guys just pick a number up to 10.”
“Three!” Liv exclaimed.
“Five!” Anne yelled.
“Okay the Liv, just choose the eighth one while pressing the arrow down keys in the remote control.”
“We got, Force of Nature, a 2020 film. Is that okay?” Liv asked as she manages the TV.
“Yup!” Julie replied while she takes the cupcakes to a plate and placed the cake in her refrigerator.
“Sounds great!” Anne responded as she handled the flavoured drinks. They all agreed to get drunk once they arrived at the hotel.
After the movie, the cupcakes also ended. So they cleaned up and prepared their things for the second party in the hotel.
Re-blog for part four!
Lemme know what you think…
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softtransbf · 3 years
Text
Mister Nice Guy, part 2
part one
Summary: Shit hits the fan, and the rest of the BAU is done with it.
Word Count: 3523
Reader: he/him trans man, no physical description
Warnings: case involving targeting gay people, brief mention of a child abduction case, coming out/anxiety of experiencing transphobia (no actual transphobia though), alcohol, swearing
@aleccolocco (sorry it took so long to finish lol)
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
"No, that doesn't make any sense at all, doctor!" you spat his title. "He's not jealous of these couples, killing what he can't have, or a homophobe, punishing gay people for being happy. He's putting an end to their unhappy relationships. He sees it as mercy." Over the months, your cold war with Reid turned into outright conflict, and tonight, alone in the police station in Oregon, was no exception. Hotchner had tasked the two of you with presenting the preliminary profile the next morning, and it was going as well as conversations ever went.
"We have no evidence that he knows they're unhappy, though. All of his victims are clearly happy in their relationships," Reid challenged.
You rolled your eyes and scoffed. "Please. One look at their social media and it's obvious that the relationships are on the rocks."
"Where do you get that? All I see are typical happy relationships. Selfies, checking into special events together, posts about kind things one does for the other. Nothing indicating a troubled relationship to me."
"The gentlemen doth protest too much. They're painting an overly happy painting on social media, hoping that some of that happiness will actually become real. They're desperate for the relationship to work."
"Let's say you're right. I don't think you are, but let's pretend for the sake of trying to see your logic through. Why? Why would they be so desperate to save a failing relationship?"
"God, straight men just don't fucking get it!" You went to grab a file, missing his small flinch. "You don't understand how limited the dating pool for men who are into men is. Look at the most recent couple in particular. The most lovey-dovey on social media, and got the most brutal deaths."
"Yes, because they were the happiest. My theory holds," Reid interrupted.
"No. Look, this guy put way more out there on social media than his partner, and look at the pictures he posted. Look how forced his smile is, look at the body language. He needs this relationship to work, because dating as a gay man is one thing, dating as a gay trans man is almost impossible. Having to start over and deal with transphobia over and over again is worse than being in a bad relationship. In his eyes, I mean." Shit, the first person I come out to on this team cannot be Spencer fucking Reid. He doesn't deserve the honor.
"That was yesterday. We haven't gotten the autopsy report yet. How could you possibly know that he's trans?"
"Testosterone vials and needles in the bathroom. Neither of them are old enough for a cis man to reasonably have issues that require testosterone injections. It's HRT, hormone replacement therapy."
"Even if you're right, your conclusion still seems like a much bigger jump than mine, that the killer sees the relationships as happy and is lashing out at that, be it from jealousy or homophobia."
"Whatever. You'll see tomorrow, when we talk to the M.E., that he was trans, and that fact backs me up. I am absolutely right about this, and you will eat your words. Then I will present my theory, and you can choke on yours."
"We? You anticipate us spending more time together?" He raised an eyebrow.
"I meant 'we' as in the team, asshat. The world doesn't revolve around you. Mine sure as hell doesn't. I'm gonna go back to the hotel, write my own damn preliminary profile, and try to get some fucking sleep. Clearly we won't agree on this."
"We don't ever agree on anything," he pointed out.
"Not true. We agree that we dislike each other and can't get along. Good night, doctor." You turned and walked away, not giving him a chance to respond.
This man is going to be the death of me, he thought as he watched you walk away.
~
The autopsy report came in the next day, and you were right. The tech team also found a locked notes app on his phone that catalogued his unhappiness and fear of leaving. You presented your preliminary profile to the team. Reid didn't even argue; he just sat in silence, leaving the room as soon as you were finished. Never one to pass up a chance to gloat for beating him, you offered to get coffee for the team, got everyone's order, and left shortly behind him.
You were expecting to catch up to him, his impossibly long legs be damned. You weren't expecting him to be waiting for you. He pulled you into an empty interrogation room and pushed you up against a wall, his face just inches from yours. It was only a moment before being flustered by the closeness and those goddamn eyes were replaced by anger.
"What the FUCK, Reid?"
"What game are you playing, Y/N? What game are we playing? What's your endgame?" He spoke quickly and softly, but there was an intensity in his voice that had you captivated.
"I'm the one playing games?" You pushed him back, away from you. "You're the one who decided to hate me before we even met. When I transferred, all I wanted was to do a good job and fit in with the team. But quite literally from the minute I walked through the door, you'd decided you hate me. Turnabout is just fair play, gorgeous." Oh, fuck.
"Gorgeous?" You walked past him to the other side of the room, running a hand through your hair and turning your back on him. "Fine. Yeah, okay? I wanted approval from the brilliant and handsome Doctor Spencer Reid. In a way that's respectful of your heterosexuality, of course." You turned around and faced him again. "But that doesn't matter, because you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me right off the bat."
"What makes you think I'm straight?" He's fucking with me, now that that cat is out of the bag. Great. Fucking cishet men. Even he's no different. Thank god he still thinks I'm cis.
"Garcia mentioned in her newbie-run-down that you're 'awkward, but in a cute way, especially around women'. Plus, she mentioned that Emily is bi, leaving everyone else implied straight as even the best cishet allies are wont to do. And as we both know, Penelope knows everything.
And before you make the hearsay argument I can see forming in that brilliant head of yours, I've heard and seen too much about your impeccable memory to assume you don't remember when we all went to the bar after my first case. I was unabashedly Queer, friendly flirting with Derek and calling out cishet bullshit. When I did the latter, you literally rolled your eyes and walked away. Which is, funnily enough, some cishet bullshit. 
JJ said you were just going through a thing and things would get better, but they just got worse. I'm not going to ask you to spill whatever was going on, because it's not my business, but god damn, dude. Why did you hate me so much so quickly?"
"You asked JJ about me?" He took a few steps towards you, a small smile on his face.
"That's the part you focused on? Jesus fucking Christ. Yes, I asked her about why you decided to hate me before we even met. Whatever. I hope you got whatever you were looking for by pulling me in here. I'm done. Done with this conversation, done with whatever has been going on with you and us since the day I transferred." You turned to leave, but he grabbed your arm. It was barely more than a light touch, but you let it stop you.
"Y/N. I can't-" he sighed. "God, you make my head spin. I can't organize my thoughts enough to say what I want to. JJ was right, there was something I had to work through, and I guess you'd made up your mind about me before I figured it out. It isn't an excuse for how I treated you, just an explanation. As for the more recent development of arguments… I guess I read a subtext that wasn't there. I could never dislike you, let alone hate you. I am truly sorry for- for all of it." With three long strides, he was out the door.
Make his head spin? What subtext? Since when is he unable to say what's on his mind? And what was that about not disliking me? All we've done since we met is argue or ignore each other. Why else would he act like that? Why do I even care? Why am I so knotted up about what he's thinking and feeling? Whatever. Fuck him, and not in the fun way. I've gotta go get coffee for the team. As you were getting the coffee, you couldn't get the memory of his face, so close to yours, to stop playing in your head.
The rest of the case was mostly as normal, but there was an energy between you and Spencer that was distant like when you joined the team, but there was something else to it that you couldn't quite put your finger on. It made you a little bit sad, though, for reasons you didn't understand.
~
"I love you, Y/N. I love you so much. I pulled away from you because it terrified me how much I loved you from the moment you walked through the door that first day. Being around you, even when we were arguing, made me feel alive in a way I never had before. You're all I think about, you're all I could ever want. I love you."
"I… I love you too." You didn't know which one of you moved, maybe you both did, but in an instant, you were kissing Spencer Reid, and you couldn't have been happier.
-
You woke up with a start, breathing heavily. You looked around; you were in your room, home alone, and it was 3:37 am. What the hell was that?
Four hours later, you trudged through the door of the BAU office, venti red-eye in hand. You made it about ten steps before Derek had his arm around your shoulders.
"Whoa there, hot stuff. Rough night?" You tried to shake him off, but he wouldn't budge, so you just kept walking, making him go with you towards your desk.
"So not your business, Derek. You being open with your personal life doesn't mean we all have to be open like that with ours."
"Personal life, huh? So who is he? More importantly, how was he, and should we expect more mornings like this in the future?" You rolled your eyes and playfully shoved him away. You'd reached your desk, so you sat on top of it, facing him. As you did, you made eye contact with Spencer, who was well within earshot. His face was unreadable, and you weren't sure why him hearing Morgan tease you like that upset you. It never had before.
"No, Derek. There's no one. Just some nightmares. Nothing major; I'll be fine by tomorrow." You got off your desk, sat in your chair, and logged into your laptop. Derek whistled and walked away without another word, shaking his head.
You tried to focus on the paperwork you needed to get done, but you couldn't stop thinking about that dream. The feeling of his lips on yours… it felt so real.
This is ridiculous. Love? We don't even like each other. Well… there was the stuff he was saying yesterday- 'I could never dislike you, let alone hate you', and some sort of subtext? But not disliking someone is a far cry from love. Plus, he's straight, so this is all absurd. And even if he DID have feelings for me, I sure as hell don't return them. I mean, maybe he's not as awful as I've thought, especially if he wasn't coming from a place of dislike. And he really is very pretty. Those eyes… Wait, what the fuck? This is all fucking ridiculous. I just need to get a full night's sleep tomorrow, and all this weirdness will be gone.
You took a giant gulp of your coffee, shook your head, and ran your fingers through your hair. Fortunately, Hotchner called a team meeting, forcing your attention to other things.
While no case could ever be described as 'normal', this case was pretty cut and dry, once you figured out what you were looking for. No dramatic twist, no tense showdown at his arrest. There weren't many cases like that, but you were very glad that this one was. You never sleep well when on a case, and no matter what you did, you couldn't shake that dream, the butterflies it left in your stomach every time you looked at him, and the strange disappointment when, unlike before that moment in Oregon, he wasn't looking at you.
Two more weeks passed. The energy between you and Spencer, whatever force it was that had drawn you together to argue again and again, was gone. You were polite to each other, and cooperated as necessary, but didn't do more than the bare minimum when it came to interacting with each other. Your interactions were cold and low-spirited. So you were so glad for a fun night out with Penelope, Emily, and JJ.
"So, Y/N, things seem… different… between you and Spencer these days. Did something happen?" Emily's tone made it clear that the three of them had intended to bring this up long before the plan to get drinks was even made. "I appreciate y'all waiting until I had a couple of drinks in me at least before going here. I guess we just got tired of fighting? I don't know. I can't figure out what's going on in that brilliant head of his. I thought I at least knew where I stood with him, even though it was purely adversarial, but I think I was wrong. But then that leaves me with no idea what he thinks of me or why I care so damn much."
"Really? No idea at all?" JJ asked. "I remember walking by a closed door in the police station in Oregon and hearing the word 'gorgeous' being thrown around." "Oh my god. You heard that?" You buried your face in your hands, and they all laughed.
"Yeah, I did, but only that one word. I'd figured you were on the phone with someone, but then you and Spence both started acting sad. I wasn't sure, of course, that you were talking to him until just now."
"Fuck. Okay, yeah. I think he's pretty. But I'm absolutely not alone in that. Derek calls him Pretty Boy, for goodness' sake. Appreciating someone's beauty doesn't have to mean anything more."
"Y/N, really? After everything we've been through together, you're gonna lie to us like this? Whatever happened, you've both been miserable since, and it's throwing the whole team off balance."
"What do you want me to say, Penelope? That I'm in love with him? He's pretentious and a know-it-all and a nerd and funny and kind and gorgeous and oh my God. I think I'm in love with him." The three women clapped and cheered.
"Finally, you get there! Took you long enough." Emily winked. "So, what's the plan now?"
"Keep this shit between us until my feelings go away. Even if he wasn't straight, I wouldn't risk fucking things up by telling him how I felt. As it is, I stand no chance in hell, so I'm just gonna write this one off as another straight guy I've fallen for and try to move on."
"Y/N, if you tell him-" Penelope started.
"No. You, more than anyone, know why I can't even entertain the idea of trying to be with him. I can't set myself up for that kind of pain. Not here, not where things are so good." You looked at all three of them. "I know that your intentions were good, but I just can't do this. I'm sorry." You grabbed your coat and left.
Your interactions with Spencer changed yet again. Now that you knew you loved him, you couldn't help yourself from being warmer towards him. As the weeks passed, you got closer. After three weeks, you considered him to be a good friend, not that that made things any less painful. You were just hoping that Penelope, Emily, and JJ were going to respect your wishes and drop the subject of your feelings for him.
[From: Penelope]: round table room ASAP
Shit. The last time you'd gotten that text from Penelope, the team left on a serial child abduction case 30 minutes later. So, despite it being your day off, you ran out the door and were there with your go bag in 15 minutes.
But no one else was there. No files on the table, nothing to indicate that there was a new case. You pulled out your phone to call Penelope, but then you heard a commotion outside the door- you'd closed it behind you.
"No, Derek, wait, I don't-"
"Can it, Pretty Boy, and thank me later." Derek opened the door, pushed Spencer into the room, winked at you, and shut the door, all in about 3 seconds.
"Spencer. Um, hi. Is the rest of the team not going to join us? Garcia's text seemed pretty urgent." You tucked your phone into your pocket.
"I don't think so, since I just heard Morgan barricade the door." He tried to open the door and failed.
"Oh my god they're Parent Trapping us. I'm gonna kill them."
Spencer tilted his head, confused. "Parent Trapping?"
"Oh my god have you not seen any of the Parent Trap movies? Were you living under a rock in 1998?" "I was seventeen and working on my first doctorate, so pretty much, yeah," he laughed. You couldn't help but laugh, too, as you firmly ignored how his smile made you absolutely melt.
"Fair enough. The '61 one is good too, but the '98 Lindsay Lohan one is Iconic for good reason. Anyway. The point is, they've locked us in here and won't let us out until we have a conversation."
"Just a conversation? Or do they want us to talk about something in particular?" He took a seat at the table.
"I- yeah, they have a particular topic in mind. I'm so sorry. This is my fault. I was tipsy and said things I should have just kept to myself. I thought they'd respected my wishes and left well enough alone, but clearly they didn't. And they won't let us out of here until I tell you-" you hesitated.
"Tell me what?" He leaned forward, and part of you swore you saw hope in his beautiful brown eyes. You looked at the floor, avoiding them.
"Tell you that I… have feelings for you. Romantic, cheesy, butterflies-in-my-stomach feelings. I don't know why they want me to tell you this. We've just gotten to a good place as friends, and you're straight, and-"
Somehow you missed the sound of him getting up and taking the few steps over to you, because you practically jumped out of your skin when his hands were suddenly on your shoulders.
"Y/N. Please, darling, look at me?" Bewildered by the endearment, you did, and his smile was blinding. "I'm not straight. I'm bi, and I think part of me has been in love with you since your first day at the BAU. The thing JJ said I was working through? The potential problems of having feelings for a coworker. For you. As soon as you walked through that door", he pointed and then took both your hands in his, "I loved you. The night at the bar? I was rolling my eyes at myself for how much I wanted to kiss you, and I walked away to stop myself from doing something reckless. I love you, Y/N. Can I do something reckless?"
"I'm trans," you blurted. "I hope that doesn't change anything, but it's something you should know. If knowing that I'm trans changes things, now is the time for you to say something. If it's a problem and it blows up later, it might actually kill me. Because I love you, too. So much. If it doesn't change anything, then please, Spencer, kiss me."
The words were barely out of your mouth before his lips were on yours. You weren't sure how long you were kissing before you were interrupted by cheers from the other side of the door. "Shit, Spencer, they're going to be the worst about this, aren't they?" You were a bit embarrassed by how breathy your voice was, but you were too happy to really care.
"Oh yeah. We're not going to get a moment that's just us in this building ever again. Do you want to get it over with and face them, or would you prefer we stay in this moment a bit longer?"
"What do you think, doctor?" you asked, pulling him in for another kiss.
180 notes · View notes
dakotacrisis · 3 years
Text
Cherry Blossoms
Coping with my mental health dip by writing something gay for my comfort pairing.
Marigami Hanahaki Disease AU because it is June and I just need some slightly angsty hurt/comfort goodness rn.
Read on AO3
---
Spring was such a beautiful time of year. Probably Kagami’s favorite. All the snow melted and the cold went away and the world slowly started to come back to life. She loved spring in Japan. The whole town would be covered in beautiful pink cherry blossoms. Such a soft and comforting color. There was a reason it was used so much in shows when a character fell in love or started catching feelings for someone.
Kagami had gone most of her life without meeting anyway who made her world pink like in the shows. She was focused on her fencing and her school work. Love just wasn’t in the cards for her it seemed. Maybe when she attended university that would change but so far she was sixteen years old and still had yet to feel even a twinge of that warmth and flutter that seeing the cherry petals back home did.
That was until she moved to France with her mother. She met a boy who was nice and sweet and for the first time she thought that maybe love wasn’t pink and fluttery. Maybe love was golden and flowing, like a beam of sunlight touching the earth. That’s what being around this boy felt like. Adrien Agreste was his name. A nice boy with a nice face and a nice personality. He had friends that she got to meet that came with their own vivid colors. Soothing blue, fiery orange, mysterious indigo, calculating green, and bold red. They were all swell and Kagami liked spending time with them.
Kagami tried to make herself like Adrien more than she did. She wanted to like him so badly. She wanted to feel something more when she was with him. She really did. But that all went out the door one afternoon.
She was sitting with her new friends at a spot on a bridge, eating ice cream and people watching when someone’s phone beeped.
“That’s me,” Alya handed her ice cream to Kagami, “Can you hold that for a second? Thanks.” Kagami took the ice cream without question and watched as Alya’s face split into the biggest grin Kagami had ever seen. “No way! No way! No way!”
“What’s going on?” Nino, Alya’s boyfriend, asked.
“Guess who got home early from her visit to Shanghai?” Alya announced to the group.
The group immediately perked up and began talking excitedly. Now this was new. Who could they possibly be talking about? Kagami had heard nothing about anyone being in Shanghai.
“Is she coming out?” Adrien asked, “It feels like she’s been gone forever.”
“I just texted her our location, she’ll be here in a few minutes!” Alya bounced happily in her seat. “I cannot wait to see her again! It has been way too long!”
“Who are we talking about?” Kagami asked.
“Our friend, Marinette,” Adrien explained, “She spent the last couple months interning at her cousin’s fashion company in Shanghai.”
“We were expecting her home some time next month but apparently she was really missing home and all of us so she decided to come back early. This is so great that you finally get to meet her!” Alya said.
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you mention a Marinette before. How come?” Kagami was a very good listener and she would have remembered someone bringing up a long-distance friend.
“Cause once we start talking about her we start missing her and then next thing you know we’re all over at her parent’s bakery eating our sorrows away.” Rose sighed, “She is probably the sweetest person ever so her absence these past couple of months have just been torture. Like a huge part of our lives has been missing.”
Wow. This Marinette was certainly getting built up to be larger than life. Kagami could only imagine what she was like in person. She stewed in her thoughts, listening to everyone’s chatter as she tried to picture what this Marinette girl would look like.
“There she is!” Alya bolted from her seat and ran down street to tackle a girl in a hug. Soon the others had followed suit and clamped onto the girl, effectively blocking her from Kagami’s view. They moved in a massive huddle back towards the benches they were occupying with all the excited squeeing and a bombardment of questions.
“We missed you so much!” she heard Mylene say, “And we have someone new to introduce you to. This is Kagami, a friend we made while you were in Shanghai.”
The crowd parted and Kagami’s world exploded into pink. Every shade of the rosy hue danced before her eyes as she gazed upon a petite Asian looking girl with shoulder length black hair, bright blue eyes, and wearing a simple pink sundress printed with butterflies. Her stomach started to flutter as if the butterflies on the girl’s dress had flown down her throat directly.
“Hello,” Marinette’s voice was like a sweet song that enraptured Kagami’s remaining senses, “It’s nice to meet you, Kagami. My name is Marinette.”
“You too,” Kagami muttered, unable to clear the tickle in her throat, “Nice to meet you too.”
Marinette nodded and was swept back into the conversation with her friends as they asked her what her stay in Shanghai was like. Kagami sat frozen on the bench as the swaths of pink cleared from her gaze. What had that been? In one instant she had been rendered completely dumbstruck by a girl she had just met. Was it because she was cute? Because she was. Marinette was a very pretty girl. Kagami understood what the others meant about a void in their lives with her absence. The girl positively radiated warmth and kindness out of her every pore. The days must seem dreary indeed without her around if this was Kagami’s initial reaction to meeting her.
The evening continued on as everyone caught up with Marinette. Kagami sat off to the sidelines not wanting to intrude on their time. It had been several months since they had seen her after all. Kagami wished that she had something to say to Marinette. But what was there? She didn’t know this girl from Eve. All she knew was that she simultaneously wanted to never be parted from her yet far away from her at the same time. She craved her attention but almost felt unworthy to be near her at the same time. It was a feeling Kagami was not used to.
Soon it was time for everyone to head home. Adrien offered Kagami a ride back to her house and they got into the car together. “So, what did you think of Marinette? You didn’t really talk to her much I noticed.”
“She’s…” Wonderful. Beautiful. Effervescent. An brilliant white swan among honking muddy geese. “She’s nice. I didn’t want to intrude while you all were catching up with her though.”
“I think you two would get along great. Next time we go out you should talk to her. We can even stop by her parent’s bakery tomorrow. I don’t think we’ve ever taken you before.”
“Bakery?”
“Yeah, the Dupain-Cheng Bakery near my school. It’s a great place to get pastries but it is too tempting to be good for your waist line if you know what I mean. Also, with Marinette gone it just bummed everyone out going in and knowing she wasn’t there. That’ll probably change now that she’s home though.”
They pulled up to Kagami’s house. She got out and wandered inside in a daze. She mindlessly kicked off her shoes at the door and went to her room to think over the evening. When she laid down for bed flashes of pink returned, surrounding a brilliant white smile and soft bluebell eyes.
The next day proved no better for her sudden predicament when Adrien dragged Kagami to the Dupain-Cheng Bakery for the first time. The entire bakery felt like an extension of Marinette. Sweetness and cheer filling every corner and when Marinette popped up behind the register in a cute apron and a handkerchief holding her hair back out of her face Kagami saw that same flurry of pink she had the day before.
“They got you working already?” Adrien joked with her. “You would think they’d give you a day off since you just got home.”
“You really think that? This is one of our busiest times of the year.” Marinette rolled her eyes, “I’d be more concerned if they didn’t drag me down here to help. Speaking of which, what can I get for you two today?”
“What do you recommend?”
“Well, with it being spring time we do have these new cherry love letters.” she pulled a tray of pastries out from the case. It was dough that had been folded to look like a letter with cherry filling stuffed inside and sealed with a little icing heart. “They’ve been going fast so if you want some you’d better grab one now.”
“Sounds delicious, we’ll take two.” Adrien said, clapping his hands together, “Kagami loves cherry desserts, isn’t that right?”
“Yeah…” Kagami mumbled. That tickle in her throat was back.
“A girl after my own heart, personally I like strawberries better but cherries are a very close second.” Marinette packed two of the love letters into a small pink box and handed it to Adrien. “You two have fun and come back again soon.”
“When does your shift end? Maybe we could hang out after.” Adrien suggested.
“I can’t really, I still have a ton of unpacking to do once I’m done helping out down here.”
“We can help you unpack.” the words flew out of Kagami’s mouth. “I mean...it would go faster with some help, wouldn’t it?”
“That’s very sweet of you, Kagami. If you two don’t mind it would be a big help and still give us the chance to hang out. I’m really interested in getting to know you a little more.” Marinette flashed her a smile that made Kagami’s knees weak.
This was ridiculous! How could one girl she barely knew have such a strong hold over her already? It was mind boggling. She practically had her own gravitational pull.
Adrien and Kagami left the bakery to walk around and eat their pastries while they waited for Marinette’s shift to end. Adrien commented on how it was so nice of Kagami to volunteer to help Marinette despite not really knowing her. Yep...just good old Kagami saying stuff before she thinks because she doesn’t know how to handle herself in front of the pretty girl that bathes her world in endless waves of sugar and pink. The cherry love letter in her hand almost seemed to mock her. Why couldn’t they have been regular turnovers? Why did they have to be called love letters of all things?
After a few hours Adrien got a text from Marinette that she was done and the two turned around to head back towards the bakery. Kagami seriously considered pretending to have a sudden appointment or practice to get out of going back which was not like her. She was Kagami Tsurugi for goodness sake! She didn’t run from a challenge! She faced all her problems head on and she did not hesitate for anything. Yet this freaking girl made her want to run and hide like a coward.
They made it back and Adrien lead them through a back door up a flight of stairs to the apartment above the bakery. Marinette greeted them just as cheerfully as she did when they walked into the bakery earlier. Kagami took a deep breath and braced herself as she entered her home. It was a fairly normal little house. Nothing too out of the ordinary. They walked up another set of stairs and through a trapdoor into what was Marinette’s room.
Kagami almost fainted. It wasn’t just that Marinette herself made everything around her look pink and sweet but that was what her entire room looked like. Everything was pink from the walls to the furniture to the wastepaper basket. At least when she was around Marinette the pink faded away into background noise after a while. Here it felt like Kagami was trapped with these weird feeling she had been experiencing since she first met the girl.
“I really appreciate you guys coming over to help, everything is a bit of a mess right now.” She sighed at the clothes tossed over the chaise and spilling out of her luggage. “Oh! Before I forget! Adrien, I got you a little souvenir while I was in Shanghai.” Marinette rifled through her luggage and pulled out a little black kitty plush with a green collar and bell. “Isn’t this just the cutest thing ever? There was a little corner shop near my cousin’s office building that sold hand made plushies and I just had to pick some up.”
“He’s adorable!” Adrien took the kitten with glee, “Thank you!”
“I figured you’d appreciate it since your dad won’t let you have an actual cat. I debated getting you a hamster one but there was only one and I’m sorry to say but I was selfish and wanted to keep her for my self.” She pulled out another plush of a tan and white hamster wearing a little red raincoat and hat. “Isn’t she just the cutest thing you’ve ever seen in your life?”
“I swear I’m gonna cry,” Adrien was not joking, he looked like he was close to real tears, “She’s so cute! Look at her little raincoat!”
“I know!” Marinette turned to Kagami, “I wish I had know that you were around, Kagami, or else I would have brought you a souvenir too.”
“Oh no, that’s fine,” Kagami waved it off, “You couldn’t have known so it really doesn’t matter.”
“Wait, I have just the thing,” Marinette started throwing her clothes around as she dug through more of her luggage and making more of a mess. “Here we are! You can have this!”
“Really, you don’t need to--”
“I insist,” Marinette held up a pink butterfly barrette and clipped it into Kagami’s hair, “I got a lot of free stuff just like it while interning for my cousin. And now we match!” she clipped a similar butterfly barrette into her own hair.
Kagami mumbled her thanks and spent the rest of the afternoon in silence whilst Adrien and Marinette did most of the talking. The three of them went about unpacking and putting stuff away where Marinette told them to. Every now and again they would try to pull Kagami into their conversation but she was finding it increasingly harder to find her tongue in this scenario. At one point Adrien excused himself to use the bathroom leaving the two girls alone.
“You don’t talk much, do you?” Marinette said after Adrien had left. Kagami looked across at her in surprise. Marinette spoke so calmly with a serene and understanding smile, “I get it. My friend Nathaneal was never much of a talker either. I still got to know a lot about him though through other means. Kinda like I’m doing with you. It’s sorta like a fun little game, deciphering someone’s personality from what they do rather than what they say.”
Kagami wasn’t sure what to say so she simply nodded and let Marinette keep talking.
“Like I can tell from the way you fold stuff that you are very neat and organized. You are dressed sharply like you want to impress people but the clothes are well loved so you find them comfortable and wear them more for yourself than you do anyone else. Your hair is short and neatly trimmed meaning you probably get it cut often so it stays salon fresh but also because you can’t stand it when it touches your shoulders. You don’t like distractions or having to worry about maintaining it during long days.” Marinette listed everything off as if it was common knowledge. Kagami could only stare both impressed and a little intimidated by her spot on assessment. She got all of that just from watching her for a couple hours?
“You also hum while you work and you smiled at the silly little souvenirs I brought back.” Marinette continued, “There’s not a whole lot I can gather from that I just thought it was cute.”
“You are a very perceptive person, aren’t you?” Kagami found something to say at long last.
“I like to think so. People express who they are through every little thing that they do and I find that kind of fascinating. When you take the time to watch someone you see all these little things that build up into the person as a whole. Eventually when you look at them you don’t see their face you just see them. Like their entire personality is written into the laugh lines and freckles on their face.”
“I get what you mean.” Kagami said, easing into the conversation the more she spoke, “It’s like how I felt when I met Adrien. When we met he was just the cute blonde boy with big green eyes but as time went on he transformed into this smart yet incredibly naive, pun-spewing dork.”
“That is an accurate summation of his character. Never have I met a boy that gets such immaculate grades but will walk face first into a pole he saw coming.” the girls laughed. When Adrien came back up he asked what was so funny which just made them chuckle more. They waved him off saying it was just a little girl talk and to not worry about it. Kagami loosened up a bit more, she still didn’t talk much but she didn’t feel like fleeing in a rush of nerves either.
When everything was done Adrien and Kagami left. Marinette had given Kagami her number before they had gone and told her to text her soon. Even her little sticky notes were cute. They were shaped like cherry blossoms.
“What did I tell you?” Adrien nudged her as they left, “You and Marinette got along just fine. Then again, it’s hard not to want to be her friend, isn’t it?”
Kagami glanced back at the house. Little fairy lights twinkling in the evening along Marinette’s balcony. She cleared her throat of the tickling feeling that had lodged there. “It surely is,”
---
(Next)
41 notes · View notes
arminhug · 3 years
Text
hello, pumpkin || annie leonhardt x reader: chapter two
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。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫
BIRTHDAY GIRL
Annie and I never established that we were friends until her eighth birthday.
In the blossoming spring warmth, I nestled myself in the corner of the bench in the playground’s garden. It was an unspoken fact that nobody really played in the garden; it was a quiet haven for a few of us to read or enjoy solitude, yet it had also become a spot where I waited for Annie every day, and almost every day, had she not been sent home or busy with other obligations, Annie joined me, sometimes speaking, sometimes not. I didn’t mind; I just loved to be in her company.
On this particular day, Annie stood before me, and despite her being the same height as me, her air always made her seem much bigger and powerful.
“My dad says this is for you.”
She handed me a white envelope into which I fervently tore, revealing a gaudy invitation card.
“It’s your birthday on Saturday?” I quizzed.
“No, my birthday is today. But my dad said it was too short notice to invite you to my house today, so you can come on Saturday.”
At this news of Annie’s birthday, I immediately leapt to my feet and braced her in a hug. “Happy birthday! What cake are you having? Are you going to hand out sweets to your class?”
Annie did not hug me back but did not resist. “I don’t like cake, and I don’t like anyone in my class.”
I gasped. “How can you not like cake? Also, who’s going to be at your party if you don’t like anyone in your class?”
“Cake is too heavy and sweet.” She responded monotonously. “Also, you’re the only one coming; it’s not a party, my dad just knows I have a friend now and wanted you to come. You don’t have to.”
Unlike Annie, I didn’t actively avoid the other children in my school. I was still invited to many class birthday parties, I spoke amiably to my peers and I could name a few schoolchildren whom I could consider a friend— yet Annie, the stoic, ash-blonde girl confessing she saw me as a friend elicit such joy within me, I can still remember the feeling to this day if I think about her enough.
“So if I’m your friend, I have to get you a present, right?” I had reminded her of the title that she gave me moments ago.
“No. I don’t want a present.”
“Yes you do, everyone wants presents!” I retorted. “What do you like best in the world?”
“Cats.”
I sat down, sulking. “I can’t get you a cat, Annie. What else do you like?”
Silence.
“Mummy and I can make you something.” I continued, desperate to find something that I could give to my friend. “She’s really good at baking. Do you like cookies?”
“No.”
“Cupcakes?” I refused to give up.
“No! Cupcakes are tiny cakes, you know I hate cakes.”
“Brownies?”
“No.”
“Doughnuts?”
This time, Annie turned away, not meeting the question with a monosyllabic “no”.
“Doughnuts! Annie, I’ll make you lots of doughnuts, okay?”
Annie still refused to look me in the eye. It never bothered me, but I had gathered that she was more inclined to refuse eye contact when she was upset or shy. Before I had the chance to attempt to pry into which flavour of doughnut she would have liked, the bell signalling the end of recess rang. I leapt to my feet and pressed a chaste kiss to Annie's cheek.
“See you later, you doughnut!”
She shoved me towards my line with no malice in the action. “Whatever you say, pumpkin girl.”
“Earth to (y/n)? You’ve been glazed over for the past five minutes. What’s so exciting about the window?”
I blink, snapping out of the saccharine memory of Annie’s birthday. Four pairs of eyes are fixed on me, and I animate myself, taking the doughnut from my plate and shrugging. “I was just thinking,” I respond.
“You sure? Not looking at any hot dudes?” the only other female at the table, Sasha, suggests. Her hazel eyes flicker suggestively over to the group of men kicking a ball about in the park over the road from our favourite local café, which has baked goods to die for (or so Sasha and Connie, the food fanatics of my friendship group claim. I won’t argue—the doughnuts are heavenly.)
“Yeah, c’mon, (y/n)! There are three dashing fellows right here, why do you need to stare at those losers?” Connie chimes in, gesturing to himself and my other two male friends, Jean and Marco.
“Yeah, you wish. My type isn’t idiots,” I playfully smack Connie’s head, the growing stubble brushing my fingertips as I find any way to bring the subjects away from men that I would apparently find attractive.
“On all seriousness, what is your type? We’ve never seen you have anyone about.” Jean interrogates. Great.
It took me a while to figure out that I’m likely not into men. I never quite knew why I got so uncomfortable when middle school brought an array of boy bands that prepubescent teenage girls loved to swoon over, and why I could never answer when somebody asked me who was the hottest, but at the age of sixteen, when I realised my heart was racing upon seeing two women kiss in a film my friends and I had watched, it hit me like a freight train that I was definitely attracted to women.
I chose not to indulge anyone in this knowledge; realistically, I know I don’t have too much to worry about. Sure, my parents aren’t screaming about supporting gay rights from the rooftops, but I know that they have no prejudice towards the community, and my four closest friends would accept me no matter what — hell, Marco told us he was gay when we were fifteen and sixteen years old over a game of Mario Kart and we embraced his queerness with open arms.
So what’s the big deal? I think to myself.
“Does it matter? I’m too busy to date. These university decisions are killing me!”
“Simple,” Jean interrupts, pointing the straw of his ridiculously large iced coffee in my direction. “You come to Marley with Marco and me. Good university, far enough away from your parents, and you get your favourite friends with you for the ride!”
Jean and Marco are one class above Sasha, Connie and I, and decided that Marley University, a small, public school that gained a decent reputation despite it being so new, was the place for them. It was hard to say goodbye once they left school, but the holiday breaks came frequently, and soon enough, they were back for Easter, helping their three younger friends decide on which school to go to.
“Tempting, but probably not. I can’t get over the English department in Sina,” I responded dreamily.
“Yeah, and the crazy entry requirements. You’d have to be a robot to get those grades! Just come to Marley with us, I’m sure the English stuff is fine there, too!” Sasha whined, poking at my hand. I take another bite of my nostalgic treat, shaking my head.
“Guys, I love you all, but I can’t make such an important decision based on my friends. You understand, right?”
“It’s fine, (y/n),” Marco interrupts, his familiar comforting smile gracing his freckled face. “We’ll come to visit you up there, right?”
“Nope. Four of us, one of you. She is coming to Marley.” Jean retorts.
“Jesus, fair enough. I’ll book the plane tickets now!” I tell him sardonically. He elbows me jovially in response and stands, coffee in hand. “Right, we can finish our drinks and snacks on the way outside. It's too nice to be spending it indoors.”
Ignoring the protests from Sasha and Connie, who forlornly protest that they haven't had the chance to order a baked good after their main courses, the majority of the group tail towards the double doors, leaving the duo no choice but to begrudgingly follow suit. The late March sunshine is glorious, beaming down on my face, much like the day twelve years ago I was daydreaming about. It suddenly hit me that today, March 22nd, Annie would be turning twenty years old. This newfound knowledge makes my stomach drop and I cannot control the grief coursing through my being.
It's ever so odd how I can remember every detail about my childhood friend; every memory we shared together, her favourite colour, (black, which I insisted was rather morbid for an eight-year-old, so I coaxed her into putting blue as a second favourite) how on Sunday mornings her father would always pick her up from my house after a sleepover at 10 am sharp to take her to karate, even though she had told me in confidence that she much preferred kickboxing. I couldn't tell you many facts about any other childhood friend who I lost to time; it's only Annie. Every detail of the girl who made my infancy etched into my heart, refusing to leave.
As I force myself back into the present moment, I am aware that maybe Annie was more than just my best friend.
But I was so young. How could I have truly differentiated between innocuous childhood affection and romantic yearning?
“Marco?” I punctuate the spring silence before I can even stop myself. “How did you realise your first crush?”
Marco raises his eyebrows. “Jeez, it was so long ago. I was eleven and I was having a sleepover with my friend. We were on his bed playing Minecraft on his laptop, but I wasn’t even paying attention; I was just admiring his face, how he was so engrossed in the game. My heart was racing because I realised I wanted to kiss him, but I didn’t even think it was biologically possible to like the same sex, so I brushed it off. Now I look back…” he laughs awkwardly, before looking me in the eye, his tone suddenly earnest. “Why, what’s up? Anything you want to talk to me about?”
I stop in the street, completely oblivious to the speed of modern day life around me. Suddenly all I care about is how my stomach leapt when I saw her pallid figure walk through the double doors, into the garden, how I found any excuse to hold her hand, how obsessed I was with the topography of her curved nose, icy eyes, lips stark against her pale skin.
“How do you know for sure you’re gay if you’ve only ever had a crush on one person in your life? Somebody who you haven’t spoken to in eight years?”
。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫
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thebisexualdogdad · 4 years
Text
Kinktober day 2: B is for Body paint with Danny Mahealani
Co written with @inhumanshadows
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Going to the club was not on the itinerary for your friday night but somehow Allison and Isaac convinced you to join them for neon night.
"Why did I let you guys talk me into this?" You ask, pulling your coat closer to your body as you all wait in line.
"Cause it's Neon Night" Alison states, "which means hoy guys in body paint."
"But you and Isaac are just going to ditch me to make out," you groan. 
"Well we'll just have to find you a guy of your own to make out with," she says. 
"What? You don't want to share Isaac with me?" You tease. 
"Not going to happen," she laughs.
After waiting for 20 minutes in the cold you guys finally make it inside, someone at the door handing you a few bottles of paint. 
"Y/N?" A voice asks behind you. 
You turn around to see it's Danny already half naked and covered in paint. 
"Danny hey," you say, trying not to stare at his literally glowing abs.
"Didn't expect you to be here" Danny says, moving off to the side with you. "want some help with the paint?" He asks, gesturing to the bottles in your hand.
You look back and forth from Danny and the paints. "sure..."
"Where's Y/N?" Isaac asks Allison. 
"He's with Danny," she tells him. 
"Danny's here? We should go say hi," Isaac says. 
"No we shouldn't, Y/N has been crushing on Danny all year and this might be his chance to make a move," she replies taking her shirt off, "now are you going to paint me or not?"
Isaac smiles wide. "I'd be happy to."
You let Danny lift your shirt off. "Do you want anything specific?" He asks.
"Can you do a skeleton?"
"I'm not much of an artist but I'll do my best," he smiles. 
You breathe in as Danny's finger first makes contact with your skin, rubbing a line across your sternum.
"You okay?" Danny asks.
"Yeah... the paint's just a little cold." You say, it's not a total lie cause the paint is cold.
Danny's fingers drag all over your torso as he connects line after line. After what feels like forever, Danny stands, "tell me what you think."
"Looks great," you say shakily. 
"You'd look great in anything," he tells you. 
You're trying not to blush and you see Allison and Isaac on the dance floor. 
"Looks like my friends ditched me already so do you... Maybe you want to dance with me?" You ask nervously.
"I'd love to." Danny takes your hand and you guys walk out onto the dance floor, music pounding.
You dance together, your bodies incredibly close to one another. 
At one point Danny is behind you, his arms on your waist and you can feel his breath on your neck making you shiver.
You're so in the moment you lean into his touch and it feels so nice you don't want it to end. 
Danny's breath is right next to your ear. "I like you like this."
"I like you too- I mean I- I like this too," you stumble out and Danny chuckles. 
He leans in and kisses you gently and when you don't pull away he kisses you harder. 
"Do you want to go somewhere more private?" He whispers in your ear.
"Where's private here?"
"The bathroom." Danny says leading you away.
"This doesn't seem very sanitary... Or like the first time you've done this," you say looking around the dingey bathroom. 
"It probably isn't and no it's not, there's not a whole lot of places in Beacon Hills to meet guys... Do you not want to cause it's totally okay if you don't," he explains. 
You take another look at his abs and all your worries about sanitation fly out the window. 
"No we're doing this," you say grabbing his neck and pulling him in to kiss you.
You and Danny make out hard and heavy, backing up into the sinks. 
You make out a little more and pull away, hands resting on his hips.
"Shame about my hard work." Danny comments. 
You look back into the mirror and see the paint is smeared on your back.
"You can redo it when we're done... you got a condom?"
"Not on me but the good thing about this club is free condoms under the sink," he says reaching down and opening the cabinet door to reveal a box of condoms. 
"The gays think of everything don't they," you laugh but your mind goes blank when Danny tugs his pants down revealing his huge bulge through his underwear.
“Like what you see?” Danny asks, turning and showing you the rest of the jock he’s wearing.
“I really do... can I?” Your eyes are locked on his bulge.
“Go ahead. Do as much as you're comfortable with.” Danny says, patting your shoulder. 
You get down on your knees, eye level with the bulging red fabric. You press your nose to it and inhale the smell.
You tug the material down letting him free and he was even bigger than you ever imagined. 
You make long slow strokes with your hand and Danny moans at the touch. 
You flatten your tongue on the tip and he jolts at the contact.
You stop. “You okay?” 
“I’m fine!” Danny pants. “I promise, just wasn’t expecting that. Keep going.”
You nod and flatten your tongue against the tip again, then kiss up and down each side of the shaft. You finally put the fat head in your mouth.
Danny grips the edge of the sink counter, throwing his head back. 
You tease the tip for a minute before taking more of him in, not that there was any way you'd be able to fit all of his giant cock in your mouth. 
You get about halfway down when your gag reflex kicks in. 
You slowly back off and feel Danny’s hand on your cheek. 
“Like I said... -fuck- go only as much as you can handle.”
Danny may love sex but he’s all about making sure his partner is enjoying it and being safe as well, quickies included.
You kiss the palm of his hand and take his cock back between your lips, bobbing your head up and down. 
Reaching a hand around you squeeze his firm ass and Danny tangles his fingers in your hair.
Danny can feel that knot in his stomach start to tighten.
He pulls you off of him, "take your pants off and bend over the sink... I want to taste your ass."
You nod, trading places with him, undoing the button on your jeans, Danny yanking them down, along with your underwear, exposing your ass, "damn... your ass is amazing Y/N."
You gasp as Danny's hands touch and knead your ass.
He spreads you apart and takes a slow lick over your hole causing you to groan. 
Danny opens you up further and his tongue goes to town exploring you.
You're moaning loudly, not giving a damn if anyone hears, granted the music is so loud no one either can hear or gives a damn.
"Oh fuck Danny... keep doing that," you moan, "they don't keep lube in here do they?"
"Unfortunately no that's too expensive for people to steal but my tongue's already got you pretty wet," he smirks, admiring his work. 
He stands back up, grabbing the condom from earlier and putting it on. 
"Tell me if you need me to stop alright?" He says teasing you with the tip.
"I will... just go slow?" You ask.
Danny presses a kiss to the back of your neck, "I will," and he begins to push his fat cock inside of you.
He stops when the tip and an inch or so goes in, waiting for the word to keep going, this continues until he's balls deep inside of you.
"Holy shit," you grunt at the feel of being so full. 
Danny's front is pressed to your back as he starts thrusting, the paint from his chest mixing with yours.
"You like being full of my cock?" He questions.
"Yes Danny! I love how full you make me." You moan.
One of Danny's hands comes around you and pinches your nipple while the other starts to jerk your already leaking cock.
"So wet already? Maybe I should see if I can get you to cum from just you ass getting pounded? Want that baby? Tell me what you want," he mutters in your ear. 
"Fuck me Danny," you beg. 
Danny takes both hands and puts them on your waist, holding you still as he relentlessly pounds into you.
You can hear the sound of skin slapping skin as he pounds your ass with the occasional smack of your ass.
It only takes a few minutes of rigorous thrusts for you to cum onto the sink under you. 
"Told you I could make you cum without touching your cock," he says proudly. 
You turn back and kiss him, “I knew you could. But you still need to get off.”
"So get me off then," he grins. 
He takes the condom off so you can wrap your hand around him and stroke fervently.
You stroke him until he’s panting then stop and he whines but realizes you're getting to your knees, taking him into your mouth, determined to get him off.
Your mouth works him until he cumming between your lips.
Danny cums more than you were expecting but you still swallowed as much as you could. A little dribbles out the sides of your lips as Danny pulls out of your mouth.
You wipe your hand across and lick the excess off.
You stand back up and kiss him hard, letting him taste himself. 
"You don't know how long I've wanted this," he tells you. 
"Are you serious? I've been crushing on you for a year," you reply and you both laugh.
“Wow... well at least we did something now,” Danny says, kissing you again. 
You start to get redressed when he stops you, “Hey Y/N... did you still want to redo the paint? Or maybe head back to my house?” “Honestly I am kinda tired. So your place sounds nice."
The door swings open and you suddenly realize it was unlocked that entire time. 
Thankfully it was only Isaac. 
"Hey guys," he says. 
"Hey Isaac uh, don't worry about driving me home I'm going with Danny," you tell him. 
"You sure? You're not far from Allison's," he says completely clueless.
“I’m sure. I’ll talk to you guys tomorrow.” “Okay. See you later,” You and Danny squeeze past Isaac and make it out to Danny’s car when you can’t take it and bust out laughing.
"Oh my god! I cannot believe we left that door unlocked!” You exclaim.
"That was all part of the thrill," he smirks. 
"Wait you knew?" You gasp. 
"Let's go home," he says kissing you. 
Meanwhile inside Isaac finds Allison again. 
"Y/N left with Danny," he informs her. 
"Like left left with him?" She says getting excited.
Isaac, ever clueless, “maybe?”
Allison just smiles and taps his cheek. “I’ll take that as a yes."
"Should I have not let him go?" Isaac questions confused. 
"He's finally getting laid, he needs this," Allison laughs, "now what do you say we do the same and get out of here?". 
This time Isaac knows exactly what's going on. 
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suburbanbeatnik · 3 years
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The short and very miserable life of Napoleon II, aka the Eaglet, aka Franz, Duke of Reichstadt: PART ONE
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Napoleon’s son with Marie Louise, his second wife, the daughter of the Holy Roman Emperor Habsburg Emperor Francis II, is known by a variety of names: Napoleon II, the Eaglet, l’Aiglon, King of Rome, or Franz, Duke of Reichstadt. It seems to me this kid barely gets mentioned as a footnote in most popular biographies of Napoleon. Of course Napoleon loved kids, and was over the moon that he finally had his own legitimate child, his own son and heir. He doted on this adorable and spirited blond moppet, being super affectionate with him, playing with him, spending lots of time with him, bringing him into his study to cuddle with him as he read dispatches, or tossing him up into the air when the toddler pulled on his coat-tails.
It’s very sweet and heart-warming to read all these adorable father-son moments, but honestly it’s depressing as hell to realize the best years of the Eaglet’s life was up to the age of four.
When he parted from his father after his defeat in Russia, it was all horribly and sickeningly downhill from there.
So I was reading Octave Aubry’s biography The King of Rome: Napoleon II. It’s not a new bio by any means— it’s from 1932. But it is thoroughly researched and very well written, with lots of cites from various Viennese archives, and Jesus Christ, it is depressing. The Eaglet was physically and emotionally abused by the Habsburg side of his family and by their minions for most of his very short life, and it makes for a harrowing read.  
What did his mother do to stop it, you may ask? Unfortunately, the answer is absolutely nothing.
TW: CHILD ABUSE
So, the best that could be said about his mother, Marie Louise, was that she was a weak character. If I wanted to be more blunt, I’d say she was spineless enough to the point I wonder if she was even a vertebrate.  
She was, of course, raised to hate Napoleon as a child. But then she met him and fell in love with him. She was very eager to be loved and do everything he asked her to do, even if (as Andrew Roberts points out in his own mammoth biography of Napoleon) she wasn’t the brightest bulb. But perhaps she was a perfectly cromulent empress when war wasn’t on her doorstep and she wasn’t asked to make decisions: but once the war WAS on her doorstep and decision-making was called of her, she fell apart like wet tissue. As Aubry explains:
That it would be a capital mistake for Marie Louise and her son to leave Paris was painfully evident to everyone, even to the Empress herself. But no initiative could have been expected of her. Willing, always of the best intentions, she was a passive creature both by temperament and education. She could never be more than an instrument in the hands of others. But Hortense, who had a resolute spirit behind that bleat of hers, showed both intelligence and heart in the circumstances. She was waiting for Marie Louise when the council was over, and said to her:
‘Sister dear, you must realize that in leaving Paris you will be neutralizing the defense and so lose your crown. I observe that you are making the sacrifice with great resignation.’
The Empress replied gently, almost humbly:
‘You are right. It is not my fault— the Council has decided that way.’
She was hoping vaguely for a letter from the Emperor, a counter-order that would permit her to remain. [Aubry pg 54]
At this point Louise, after fleeing Paris, wanted to be reunited with Napoleon, but she just cried and wrung her hands, as her lady-in-waiting Mme Lannes, in cahoots with Talleyrand, poured poison into her ear about how Napoleon never loved her. Then Talleyrand conspired to have all of Louise’s stuff stolen. The soon-to-be-ex-empress continued to cry and do nothing, only to go “to her room to collapse on her knees at her bedside.”
Anyway, her father swooped in and picked her up, and Metternich arranged to have Neipperg, a dashing, managing middle-aged man in uniform (Louise definitely had a type), seduce her. Within the space of weeks, she immediately changed her tune with regards to her husband, and wanted to have nothing more to do with him. As for the Eaglet, though he ended up in Vienna, he was in the care of his beloved governess, Mme de Montesquiou, aka “Maman ‘Quiou.” He was in good hands while Maman ‘Quiou was allowed to stay with him, but she was deathly afraid of being sent away, since she knew Louise was indifferent to her child and would never do the right thing, now that she was the puppet of her father and of Metternich.
With her son whom she had not seen for three months and who was enraptured at her return, she [Marie Louise] concerned herself less and less. In spite of the caresses and the gifts that were showered upon her, Mme. de Montesquiou saw things clearly and passed her judgment. Writing to her husband who was urging her to leave Vienna she said:
“My dear, do not call it my duty to return to France. As I have already advised you, you would be putting me in the greatest embarrassment, and my conscience would trouble me all my life long… If that child has a mother, very well, I could place him in her hands and be satisfied. But she is nothing less than that: she is more indifferent to his fate than the veriest stranger in his service.”
And to an intimate she confided in disgust at what she suspected and intuited:
“I have seen painful things, and I keep seeing them every day.”  [Aubry pg 81]
Unfortunately, in 1815, Maman ‘Quiou was sent away. The Eaglet wept for two days straight, and was put into the care of a certain Countess Mitrovsky, “a creature of the Empress Maria-Ludovica and an intimate of Neipperg.” The loyal Meneval, who was also to be sent away, said good-bye to the little boy, and the change in the child’s demeanor was striking.
He was struck by the child’s earnest and melancholy air. He did not run to meet Meneval with his usual lively gestures and gay exclamations. He watched him, as he entered, with the utmost indifference. Countess Mitrovsky was with him. Every few seconds he would look at her as though in fear of a reprimand. After a few conventional phrases, Meneval took his hand and asked him if he had anything to say to his papa, for he was going soon to see him. The child looked at him sadly and went away, still silent, towards the embrasure of a distant window. Meneval bade good-bye to the Countess and Mme. Soufflot [one of the few remaining French waiting women], then, as he was leaving, stepped over to the little boy who stood watching him from the window. He bent low to bid him good-bye. And at that moment, he felt a tug at his coat and heard a trembling little voice say:
“Monsieur Meva, you will tell him that I still love him dearly.”
He was only four years old and for fourteen months he had not seen his father…
When he reached the antechamber, Meneval burst into tears. [Aubry, pgs 89-90]
Not long after this, the young King was delivered into the care of a tutor named Count Dietrichstein. The Eaglet, who was “dragged” by Countess Mitrovsky to meet Dietrichstein, refused to have anything to do with him, and Dietrichstein, while weeping, dramatically claimed to a friend “he cannot love me” as long as the last French women, even the aged nurse, were in Franz’s service. So Mme Soufflot, her daughter Fanny, and the others were banished, leaving Franz completely alone.
No more warmth about him, no more deep interest, no more deep interest, no soft hands to stroke his curls, no arms to clasp him too tight when he returned weary from a drive, no knees to spread him to let him rest, no more smiling reproofs for his shortcomings, no more love in short— real love, that is disinterested, unselfish love, love for himself and love for what he was. His mother was soon to leave him, to ascend to her throne in Parma. HIs grandfather Franz treated him kindly; but he had always sacrificed him for the interests of State and would sacrifice him again, if the Chancellor [Metternich] so ordered. As for his uncles, aunts, and cousins of Austria, however well they might treat him, however generous they might be, as certain of them were, they could not— and this was natural— help seeing in him, first of all, the son of Napoleon.
He was born with an affectionate disposition. He had loved his father infinitely. With his mother he had been tender and gentle. He had adored Mme de Montesquiou and Fanny Soufflot. Now he was compelled to close his heart. Brought up by men, raised only by men, but still too much of a child to become a man, he turned inward, escaped into the little universe he had made for himself with his memories of former days. For as young as he was, he had no hope, and he did not know there was a future. He was going to grow up that way, not unhappy if one only looks at the material content of life, but if one thinks of the needs of the heart, certainly not happy. [Aubry pgs 97-98]
Count Dietrichstein decided that he was going to stamp all the Frenchness out of the Eaglet’s mind, for he must become 100% a Habsburg. Nothing but German would be spoken to him, and when he clung to speaking French, crying that he didn’t want to be a German, that he wished to be a Frenchman, he was chastised, deprived of play and outings, and then, with the Emperor Franz’s approval, actually whipped. Yes— he was whipped. When he was only five years old, because he wouldn’t speak German.
But when even that wouldn’t work, Marie Louise sat him on her knee and told him solemnly that he must speak German to please his grandfather, which finally did the trick. Not long after this, she went to the little court in Parma. She requested for her son  to go with her, but when Metternich refused, she acquiesced meekly.
Once so light-hearted and gay, the child became timid and mistrustful, and after the departure of his friends, the French women, and would lie to protect himself. In such cases he would be punished, not harshly, but not gently either. He shrank more and more into himself, accordingly, and since the world had grown hostile, he now began to offer it only a surface of indifference. [Aubry, pg 100]
He began to act out, destroying his copy books and mutilating his toys, but would also become sensitive to injustice or cruelty, like a dog being whipped or a bird eating a worm. He was told he would no longer be called Napoleon: he was to be called Franz. When he objected, he was “promptly silenced.” He became used to the name, and from here on out he was usually called Franz.
Franz still fought with Dietrichstein, who commented on his “laziness” and “ill will,” and his many quarrels with the prince, although he was happy to note in his letters to Marie Louise that it ended with “my victories.” Metternich had the boy closely followed, reports sent regularly and classified into a “ponderous file.” Meanwhile, his mother, off in Parma, when she wasn’t writing letters to her son exhorting him to pious obedience, made the feeblest attempt to defend the interests of the newly christened Franz— Franz was cut off from the succession of Parma after Metternich decided that this was in the best interests of the monarchy in Italy, Marie Louise was “readily brought into line by Neipperg, who owned her now body and soul.”
…She expressed herself as satisfied in a private letter of October, 1817:
“My son’s future has been determined. You know  that I was never ambitious for thrones or States for him, but hoped he would be the richest and most charming gentleman in Austria.”  [Aubry pg 110]
Meanwhile, Napoleon was kept on the island of St Helena, waiting for news from his son, but he heard not a word from his wife or a line from his son for six years. When he died, he was looking at Franz’s portrait, and left him many legacies, such as his books, engravings, papers, coffee service and the family house in Ajaccio, but Franz saw none of it. His mother, who was pregnant at the time with Neipperg’s son, didn’t even tell her son of his father’s death. She refused to accept Napoleon’s heart, which his will bequeathed her, because, as Aubry says, “she was more interested in the inheritance: she filed objection to the transfer of the six millions on deposit with Laffitte out of which the bequests of the Emperor were to be paid. She would not permit Marchand [Napoleon’s valet] to deliver to her at Parma Napoleon’s laces and the bracelet made of his hair.” Napoleon even begged her to take his last physician, Dr Antommarchi, into her service: she refused to even meet with him, palming the doctor off on Neipperg, who glad-handed Antommachi and pushed him out the door when he started asking too many questions about Franz.
Louise did moan about Napoleon’s suffering on St Helena while she was giving birth to Neipperg’s child, but she promptly forgot it. “She was a weak and frivolous soul. She would have grieved longer over her pet parrot, Marguerite. She even expressed astonishment that Madame Mere should have asked the British government for Napoleon’s body.” [Aubry pg 120]
One of the junior tutors named Foresti was given the task to tell the ten year old Franz that his father was dead.
The child began to weep and he wept a long time, doubtless calling up in his memory the pale face which had softened to such tenderness whenever it drew near his own. He sat down near the window, his cheeks, and his hands that covered them, wet with tears. Foresti himself was deeply moved and tried to comfort him. But the child did not hear him. [Aubry pg 122]
As Prokesch, his best friend of his short adult life, put it later:
“The prince wept for a whole day, almost without stopping. Then, suddenly, he mastered his emotions, dried his eyes, rose and paced the floor up and down. Not a word came from his lips. And several weeks passed before he alluded  to his father’s death. He felt he must keep his grief to himself.”
Meanwhile, Franz was now thinking in German, but he still rebelled against his teachers, who, for years, beat him with the ferule (a type of paddle that resembled a long and large wooden spoon, the circular head often pierced with holes, and sometimes as large as a child’s head)— his grandfather the Emperor authorized “great severity” against him when he was being “stubborn”— but this stopped when it was clear beatings no longer had any affect. Except for brief months of pleasure during summer vacations at the castle of Persenbeug where Marie Louise deigned to leave Parma, Franz, who was completely without friends, was kept in solitude. He responded by withdrawing into himself and going into a fantasy world.  
He dreamed, and gained freedom by dreaming. As a small boy he loved to play: now that he was growing up, it was still what he liked to do best. Never did child love to dream more than he: that escape from time, from responsibilities, from disappointments, that journey without end, where ideas, colors and forms mingled according to one’s fantasy! As soon as he could flee the watchful care of Foresti or of Collin, instead of working at his translations, his themes, or his arithmetic exercises, he would open the huge gilt-edged volumes given to him on his birthdays by his grandfather or the Archdukes and leaning his head on his hand, began to dream with his eyes upon the awkward, rather ridiculous illustrations of those days, in which one could see beplumed generals prancing besides their armies with spent cannonballs lying at their horses’ feet, while down in one corner an aide-de-camp would be reading an order and in the other an almoner kneeling besides a stretcher to confess a dying soldier.
Sometimes, bending low over an atlas, he would travel in spirit far out over the blue seas to the continents bordered in loud colors. One day, Matthias Collin came into the room and found him, with his cheek resting on a map. The little prince did not get up at his approach. His teacher thought he was asleep. But on going towards him, he saw the child’s eyes were wide open. The boy gave a start of surprise and blushed. He had been dreaming. Collin was more indulgent than Foresti. He did not punish him. [Aubry pg 132]
* * *
More to come in part two!
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