#that's not enough to make someone depend on you or mistake it for friendship

[sheepwasfound]

after a few days have passed now, it was interesting to read through a transcript of the instagram dm’s which dream confirmed he believed were real. seeing them just on their own like that with nothing around it is a valuable experience i feel like

[jokingmisfit]

Not A Child And Not My Job

Yandere BAU x reader

Warning- Delusional BAU, Gaslighting, Yelling, Drugging, allusions to stalking if you squint, forced regression if you squint, couldn’t do much with Penelope cause she doesn’t come to the other places with the team, didn’t add elle

(I tried something new towards the end, the writing gets sloppy to signify the readers thoughts being blurred by the drugs please let me know what you think about that)

It wasn’t supposed to be like this. My job was supposed to be a therapist. I was meant to help keep them sane and calm. To help them through tough times. This isn’t my job.

I feel more like a pet than anything. I feel like all I’ve done is thrown them deeper into this demented mind set. And it’s not like I can do anything about it. No one would believe that it’s weird. The Bau was always filled with ‘outcasts’ as they put it.

Recently I’ve had to put my feelings about it on hold. The team began slipping up on cases. They were rushing through and making mistakes. Penelope said it was because they wanted to get back to me, so I convinced the big bosses to let me go with them on cases.

That's how I ended up here. On the way back to Washington. Sat directly in the lap of Chief Hotchner. No one was directly paying me mind, they were talking about the case, however they still stared.

I didn’t listen to the conversation. My job was a therapist for the agents not to be an agent. I don’t like thinking of people in a negative light.

I kept my eyes on the book Spencer gave me. He was adamant that I read it. Last time I tried to deny a gift from one of them it was from Penelope. The look in all of their eyes when I tried to say I didn’t need an extra laptop was terrifying.

I shouldn’t be so surprised. I’ve read through a few of the files that they’ve worked on. The grisly scenes and horrific events, it’s no wonder they’ve all become twisted in their own ways.

Aarons arm rested loosely around my hip, his hand resting lightly on my thigh. The warmth of his palm should be calming, but it only serves as a reminder that they all have developed an inappropriate dependency on my presence. The thought alone makes me shift uncomfortably.

Dereks the first to respond. “Aww poor baby~ you must be tired, huh? Waking up so early only to get shoved on a plane.” 

His voice sounded genuine, but it feels more like I’m being mocked. I’m not a child.

“Why don’t we get you snuggled up on the couch hm?” JJ asked.

I’m not a child.

Frowning, I respond. “I’m fine. Just needed to move a little.”

“But, you're pouting, there's stiffness in your shoulders too, your hold on your book has loosened, and your eyes have bags under them. All of this is most likely caused by your lack of sleep. Statistically speaking 15 to 20 percent of people with insomnia develop a form of depression.” Spencer argued back at me.

Fine, if they want me to keep ignoring the truth I will put it out on the table where they can’t ignore it.

“I’m not depressed, Spencer. I’m uncomfortable, because the whole team treats me like a child.” Derek scoffs when I say this. “You all act like I’m fragile. I found you’ve all developed a dependency on me in the form of my presence.” I feel Aarons grip tighten and I lay the book on the small table. “You want to take care of me even though I don’t need it, because it gives you a sense of purpose outside the BAU.” JJ frowns and shifts where she stands. “I’ve shown you all a kindness that’s not in the form of family or friendship. You’ve all seen and experienced terrible things and as a result you warp what I am into an innocence that in reality isn’t there.”

Jason looks me in the eyes. “Alright, I think that’s enough.”

Ignoring him I continue. “Your minds are using me as a way to cope rather than handling the problems properly. Since you’ve never had someone there to listen and share with rather than each other none of you know how to properly react.” Spencer looks defiantly upset. “I’m not blaming you for not knowing how to respond, but it’s making me feel unsafe and honestly some of it is insulting.”

The plane was quiet after I stop. I try to move off of Aarons lap but he holds me in place.

“Let me go… Please.” I whisper.

His arm doesn’t move. No, his other arm comes and holds me tighter against him. My breath feels more shallow. I should’ve waited. God, this is a twelve hour flight. I feel all of their eyes on me.

I struggle more against him. “Aaron, I said let me go!” I try to pry his arms off but my hands are shaking and he’s stronger than me.

“Look you can’t even get out of his lap, and you think you can take care of yourself?” Derek said with derision.

I freeze in anger and glare at Derek. “That is completely different! I may not be able to fight people off but I can discern when I need to eat and sleep and I can sure as hell sit in a damn chair like a normal person!”

I’m startled by a slamming sound on the table in front of me. Jason looks at me with a disgruntled look. “I think we have all had enough of your tantrum.” He says sternly.

“It’s not a tantrum, it's me trying to show you the damn truth and you acting irrational!” I screamed at him.

I heard a sigh behind my ear, before Aaron said, “I knew it was a bad idea for her to come along, her little mind just  can’t wrap around everything and it’s making her act out.”

Are you kidding me?!

Tears flood my eyes in frustration. “That is not what's happening! God, how more delusional can you all become?!”

Joining in again, JJ comes over to me and wipes the tears away. “Guys, don’t be so rough on her, like Hotch said she’s too little to understand.”

This is so much worse than it should have ever been.

I writhe in Aarons grip. Screaming and moaning out, begging him to let go of me. Through the chaos of my screaming I can hear Jason say something. I continue to try and get away, but I can hear them talking to each other over it.

I feel a hand graze the side of my face. I try to move away but he grabs my face. Making my head stay still I can see Spencer's concentrated face staring at my neck. 

My neck hurts. It felt cold too. Spencer's face was also a bit blurry. He was eye level somehow. Was he crouching? When did he start smiling so sweetly at me? Is he saying something? Am I moving?

I try to speak but all that comes from me are whines. I feel like I’m freezing. I’m dizzy. 

Where’d Spencee go? Why I was so sad before? Where is I? Why I wanna cry? Where is that cooing coming from?

I’m overwhelmed by a scent like pine and, and, I don’t know. They feel soft. Feels warm. I bury my face in the warm. Is their wearing cotton? Sounds like a pool. Huh?

“You- k- we- you-”

Whas that mean? So tired gotta sleep.

[space-matt]

always there for you

matt.sturniolo x fem.reader

summary: They’re not easy days for you, especially when you’re in your dark ones. But luckily you have someone by your side who can make you smile

cw: fluff, mentions of depression, anxiety and hint of cheating

author note: hi all! this is my first story here so pls be kind! I really hope that you’ll like it 

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English is not my first language, if you see grammar and typing mistakes, I apologize in advance! I just ask you not to be rude to me ♡

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revised

"You've gone through the worst time you've ever had."

You’ve always dealt with situations differently than others, and when you’ve been diagnosed with depression, you’ve had confirmation.

It wasn't easy, but thanks to the support of your parents, you slowly got out. You started to live better even when you moved a couple of hours from home to university, only for the first year.

You had everything you could want: good grades, a group of dependable friends, and a boyfriend. But fate dealt you a cruel blow when you caught him in bed with the one friend you trusted.

The city of New York can often leave one feeling trapped and in need of escape. After much contemplation, you decide to embark on a journey of self-discovery, leaving behind a part of yourself in the city that has been your home. With your bags packed and heart filled with anticipation, you prepare to step out into the unknown and embrace new adventures in Los Angeles.

You had managed to find a small apartment and a job at a bar, but despite that, you still had an uneasy feeling at the end of each day. This feeling kept you uncomfortable and you couldn't sleep all night. On top of that you had a lot of work to do, which only added to your anxiety about managing everything.

As you were getting ready to start your shift at the bar, you suddenly saw a man walking towards you with three large glasses in his hand. You tried to move out of the way, but unfortunately, he ended up spilling the drinks all over you. The man, later introduced as Matthew, or Matt for short, was clearly apologetic and offered to help clean you up.

After a few minutes of awkward laughter and wiping the drink off your clothes, Matt suggested that he take you out that same evening to make up for his mistake. Despite the unexpected situation, you agreed to his offer and exchanged phone numbers with him. You couldn't help but feel intrigued by this fallen angel from heaven.

As you spent more and more time together, you found yourself becoming increasingly drawn to him. At first, it was just a casual friendship, but as you got to know him better, you began to see him in a different light. You found yourself admiring his sense of humor, his intelligence, and his kindness.

And as the days went by, you realized that you had developed genuine feelings for him. And it seemed that he felt the same way. The two of you spent more time together, going on long walks, sharing meals, and talking late into the night. It was as if you had found your perfect match, and you couldn't imagine spending your days without him. 

As things seemed to be settling down, your depression episodes grew more intense, keeping you in bed for days.

Your employer had prior knowledge of the situation, but they were understanding enough to grant you a few days of leave without any consequences or negative impact on your job. They recognized the importance of your well-being and the need for you to take time off to deal with the matter at hand, and therefore, they supported your decision to take a break from work. This allowed you to address the issue with a clear mind and return to work feeling refreshed and focused.

Matt was aware of the different medications you had to take in order to alleviate the disturbing thoughts and he was always there for you, supporting you no matter what. However, one thing that bothered you was that no one could see you in that condition, and the fear that one day he might become exhausted made you sink even deeper into the pillow.

For four consecutive days, you found yourself unable to get out of bed. You only left your bed to relieve yourself in the bathroom or to drink water which you had kept on the bedside table. Matt, who was concerned about you, tried to visit you by using the duplicate keys. However, you were not comfortable with the idea of him seeing you in such a vulnerable state, and you refused to let him in.

Despite your love for Matt, you couldn't help but feel guilty and ashamed of the state you were in. You couldn't understand how he could love someone like you who was unable to get out of bed for days. You tried to search for answers, but your mind was foggy, and you couldn't come up with any.

It seems that Matt's accidental spillage of glasses on you may have actually been a blessing in disguise. According to him, having you in his life is one of the best things that has ever happened to him. Your presence and the joy you bring him make him feel incredibly fortunate. Your smile, the touch of your hands, and the way you gaze at him with love and affection leave him spellbound every time.

In fact, if anyone were to ask him if he had any grievances or dislikes about you, he would be at a loss for words because he adores every single part of you, inside and out.

At this very moment, he is putting effort to find something for you, despite knowing that it might not be an ideal time. He wishes for you to comprehend that your appearance does not matter to him. Whether you have been wearing the same pair of pajamas for days, or your hair is messy and you have no make-up on, his only desire is to support you during these difficult times and be there for you every single second.

As you hear the sound of the keys fitting into the lock of the door, you quickly turn your head in the opposite direction. You notice the alarm clock on the bedside table and see that it marks 9:28 in the morning. You realize that you must have passed out last night without even realizing it, and now you are waking up to a brand new day.

In the meantime, Matt straightens up the house and knocks on your door. To his delight, it opens to reveal you lying under a white duvet. He slowly approaches. "Hey, babe, you're awake" he says. You turn around without meeting his gaze, but you can pull yourself up, noticing your favorite red roses on the bed.

You gaze into your partner's eyes, who says "Babe, look at me" Your voice is hoarse from not having spoken in days, but with longing shine in your eyes you say "I missed you"

Matt sits down on the bed beside you and pulls you into a tight embrace. You feel his strong arms wrap around you, and you lean into his chest, feeling safe and loved.

As he holds you, he whispers softly, "I missed you a lot too" Matt tilts his head down and kisses the top of your head, making you feel even more loved and cherished. The warmth of his embrace and the softness of his lips on your head make you feel like all is right in the world again. You take a deep breath and smile, grateful to be reunited with the one you love.

As you hold onto him, you can feel the weight of your emotions bearing down on your shoulders. You know you pushed him away, but you couldn't help it. Looking up into his eyes, you try to explain. "I'm sorry I pushed you away, but you know how I get when I'm in this state" you say softly, hoping he'll understand.

He stops and looks straight into your eyes, his gaze unwavering. "You don't have to worry" he says, reassuringly. "You need your time, and I respect that. You don't have to face this alone. Just know that I'm always here for you. Don't forget it" he adds, his voice gentle and comforting.

You nod, feeling a sense of relief wash over you. The weight on your shoulders slowly begins to lift. He leans in and kisses you tenderly, and you feel the warmth of his love surround you. "I love you" he whispers. "Love you too" you reply, feeling grateful for his understanding and support.

That's what you missed, him. Matt is the person you have been longing for and he has the ability to make you feel good.

[soursturniolo]

boyfriend hcs • nick sturniolo

nick/male reader • requested! • suggestive but overall sfw

- Not the type to catch feelings easily, so you both were just good friends for quite a while. You fell for him first, but kept it quiet because you didn’t want to lose him. it wasn’t until you got mistreated on a date that it came out that Nick liked you too. you called him, sniffling and upset about how some pig of a man had treated you and Nick was immediately seeing red. he had Matt drive him to your place and he held you and listened and somewhere in the middle of his rant where he was threatening that dudes entire existence if he ever saw him, he let his feelings for you slip. “if I was ever lucky enough to be the guy you were interested in I’d never treat you that way, you deserve everything good and I’d give you that”

- Sleepovers were a staple of your friendship and remained a staple in your relationship. Some nights were sultry and steamy, but for the most part it was usually innocent cuddles and shared laughs as you watched drag race together or played Fortnite. He loves sleeping with you, in his bed or yours it doesn’t matter. He always says he gets the best nights sleep next to you.

- for someone so outgoing and seemingly confident, sometimes he gets shy around you. you tell him he looks handsome and suddenly his cheeks are a little pink as he thanks you for your compliment

- The type to be out without you and send you pictures of things he sees that makes him think of you. Like if he sees pretty flowers, if the sunset looks nice, if something funny is happening, he’s taking a picture or little video and texting it to you asap

- Very protective of you. You both tried hard to keep your relationship quiet and private, not out of shame but just wanting to protect it, but it eventually came out. He’s always been a clap back king, but he saves his harshest responses back to use on people who hate on you. He has a little patience for people who say stupid shit about him and his brothers but when it comes to you he doesn’t play around at all.

- Playfully bickers and argues with you about the stupidest things because he thinks youre hot when you’re a little mad

- Not always the biggest on vocally telling you how he feels, so he shows it in a lot of ways; like always touching you, pressing a quick little kiss to your head or jaw when no one is looking, always the first to like your pictures and hype you up to everyone, listens to you so intently whenever you’re talking to him

- His brothers made the mistake of teasing you too much once. man, they thought mattitude could be bad, matt had nothing on Nick that night.

- would think most couple things are a bit cringe, but if there’s ever anything you’d really want to do he’d do it and then be real quiet about how much he actually enjoyed it

- On his really bad days where he’s stressed and every little thing is on his nerves, his brothers usually give you a call so you can come over and help. Something about your presence always helps calm him down and he’ll talk to you about whatever is bothering him, his head resting on your chest as your heart beat and calm voice soothes him.

- sometimes the big spoon sometimes the little spoon. He likes both equally so it depends on the mood he’s in or he leaves it up to you. he loves holding you just as much as being held by you.

- the best kisser. His lips are always so soft but firm against yours. innocent and sweet little pecks, sleepy morning kisses before getting out of bed and dealing with the world, long drawn out make outs where it’s like he can’t get enough of you, you name it it’s always good. If you disagree? go argue with a wall.

tag list members; @secret-sturniolo @sturniolopepsi @christinarowie332 @mangosrar @cupidsword @st4rswrld @biimpanicking @bernardenjoyer @lovingsturniolo @loveesiren @sturnphilia @mxqdii @oh-toseewithoutmy-eyes @its-jennarose @fionaheartswomen @hedgehogperalta @lea0518 @lxvlysworld @mattsd0ll @urmyslxt @thetriplets3 @lilsxo10 @recklesssturniolo @meg-sturniolo @flowerxbunnie @mlimmm @querenciasturniolo

[punkpandapatrixk]

❣️Healthy Love ☆ Timeless Tarot Guidance

Elements/Signs in this reading are calibrated to all aenergetic placements. Feel free to read as many Elements/Signs as you feel called to at this point in your spiritual evolution♡

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I think, in order to know healthy Love, a lot of people need to be exposed to the complete opposite of it first. I dunno; it seems to be a psychopathic Game created by the Higher Beings…for the purpose of teaching us the true value of Love. How can you know fully what Love is if you never know its opposites?

So yeah, if you’re young and inexperienced, it’s perfectly OK not to be so hard on yourself when you make mistakes in matters of Love and infatuation. We’re all learning to overcome each and all of our crazies. Ultimately, what’s really important is that we develop a stronger psychology and make swift decisions to disengage from whatever relationship/situationship/even friendship that makes us unhealthy and miserable♡

You’ve got this!

☆♪°・. aenergetic companion PAC ☆♪°・.

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Healthy Love for 🐞Fire Signs – Green Alchemist (Nicolas Flamel)

4 of Cups, 4 of Pentacles, 6 of Cups Rx

When it comes to Fire Signs, loving is a passionate business. There could often be a desire to pursue something until the end just to prove yourself the victor in a competition. In this sense, are we sure we’re actually in it for the Love for that other person? Or is it just about winning and feeling very special because we’re the Chosen One? XD Fire Signs often don’t even realise that they’re in it just for the thrill—just trying to fulfil some fantasy because daily life is often boring.

If your Love ain’t true, you can’t properly give to the other person. That’s not healthy or fair. Careful you’re not blind to the selfishness of desiring a partner only for that person to fulfil a role in a fantasy of your making. If you must love a person, I hope you love from the heart, with a passion for making that person happy. I hope you love sanely and feel free enough to give and receive.

And also remember that in a true love setting, you don’t act as someone’s saviour in a co-dependent manner. We all can be a healing presence for our dearly beloved who’s been hurt in the past, but we’re not responsible for the healing of someone who doesn’t want to live in the present moment or look towards a better future. Love, is a mutually healing connection, whether in romance, friendship, or familyship~

Oracle Guidance for Fire Signs🔻❤️

🐏Aries – Priestess of Ambition

🦁Leo – Priestess of Prosperity

🎠Sagittarius – Priestess of Love

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Healthy Love for 🐍Earth Signs – Silver Magus (Merlin)

2 of Cups Rx, II The High Priestess Rx, Queen of Cups

Ahhh omaigaaa you’re quite intense when it comes to loving, aren’t you? Earth Signs are not worldwide-level recognised for their passion because you guys are such tsundere. But you care a lot when you’ve fallen in love, so much so, you’re willing to sacrifice even your health for those you prize. I hope you don’t go too far with this kind of tendency. Because if giving too much makes you bitter, in the end, you could flip 180 and turn very selfish instead. Extremes are not healthy, baby. You wanna go back to balance and love sanely <3

But you know what’s even more important when it comes to loving? Honest, real, raw communication. To actually put your feelings, thoughts, emotions, as well as intents into words, so that the other person can VIEW you clearly. That’s your problem, isn’t it? You’re so afraid of talking about emotions because vulnerability is cringe, but in reality, you always have so much to tell someone. Vulnerability with the right person is sweet, not cringe XD

After all, someone who’s truly grateful for all that you’ve done for them, for all that you ARE, will view everything about you as lovely. Why not be lovely back to them? Love is lovely LMAO Love isn’t addictions or obsessions. Real healthy love is sometimes silly, cheesy, but most of all, sweet and lovely XD

Oracle Guidance for Earth Signs🔻💚

🐂Taurus – Priestess of Integrity

🧘🏻‍♀️Virgo – Priestess of Luxury

🐐Capricorn – Priestess of Luck

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Healthy Love for ⛲Air Signs – Green Magus (John Dee)

King of Pentacles, 8 of Wands Rx, XIV Temperance Rx

I think it’s a lie when Air Signs say they don’t feel too much or don’t value feelings over logic. If you’re this type of an Air Sign, you’re probably just unaware of how much you feel for someone. I mean, the fact that you can’t stop thinking about the person you like…isn’t that fuelled by a desire to feel something? XD Air Signs are the cutest when you’re in love, but what’s unhealthy about your style is how much you fookin’ LIE. I dunno, do you lie because you want to impress? Do you lie because you’re embarrassed?

What’s tragic about Air Signs is how you struggle with delivering your real honest thoughts about someone when Air is literally the Element of Communication and Networking hahahah Maybe it’s because you often don’t even facilitate your own emotions and thoughts to exchange information. The head and the heart not agreeing with each other because they aren’t sure what’s going on? You know, the left brain and the right brain synchrony? It’s like you have completely separate departments for feelings and hard facts and they don’t even come into contact with each other.

This is actually kinda the reason why you often feel unbalanced when you have fallen in love with someone. You tend to feel pulled in just one direction which feels wrong and uncomfortable. Ultimately, for being an Air Sign, this is part of your character development to balance yourself in the way you perceive romance and relationships, even friendships. Hard facts and objectivity are crucial to maintain a just society, but remember as well that the Human Experience is a subjective experience. When you’ve grown up and spiritually glowed up, your perspectives on things will be super valuable to this often desperately-in-love society~

Oracle Guidance for Air Signs🔻💙

👯Gemini – Priestess of Good Fortune

⚖️Libra – Priestess of Ritual

🏺Aquarius – Priestess of Faith

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Healthy Love for 🐝Water Signs – Green Astronomer (Nicolaus Copernicus)

8 of Swords Rx, Knight of Wands, 4 of Swords Rx

Oh gosh, respect, freedom, just this feeling of actually being free and still safe in the arms of someone you love—isn’t this the ideal for Water Signs? Water Signs are all about feelings and empathy, but that doesn’t mean you can’t have your own identity outside of the relationship you’ve devoted yourself to. And for the most part, and maybe you’re not always honest about this, you don’t like being restricted or suffocated in a relationship. Yup, not even the Scorpios. But you like doing this to the other person, which is a really unhealthy and unfair XD

You don’t own a person. You can’t expect that. You shouldn’t even expect to be owned by your significant other. That’s actually a really big soul lesson for all Water placements. Possessions, obsessions, you think only Earth Signs struggle with these? Water is the opposite of Earth, so~ When Water Signs attempt to own a person, you want to own their soul, heart and mind; whereas Earth Signs want to own and control the person. Passion isn’t possession, OK? If you must share a passion, let it be one of Love and Respect <3

And ultimately, I hope you take very seriously your own spiritual healing so that you know how to be a sane lover. Of all the Elements, Water is actually the most psycho of all lovers LMAO You tend to use your intuitive empathetic ability to trick and manipulate emotionally, that’s why. If you must be addicted to anything at all, well, I hope you become addicted to the feeling of being safe, respected, nurtured and nourished by a someone whose heart reflects back all that’s good in you~

Oracle Guidance for Water Signs🔻💛

🦀Cancer – Priestess of Innocence

🦂Scorpio – Priestess of Healing

🎏Pisces – Priestess of Inspiration

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

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[jungshookz]

just a small compilation of yoongi and y/n being platonic soul mates

➺ pairing; lveb!yoongi x lveb!y/n pre-namjoon (sorry namjoon u r not a part of this) 

➺ genre; so much friendship fluff i love platonic love so much 

➺ wordcount; 2.8k

➺ summary; yoongi and y/n love and care about each other very much but they’ll never actually say it outright bc real friends never do that! yoongi loves y/n a lot and y/n loves yoongi a lot and to be honest I AM JUST TOO SOFT FOR ALL OF THIS!!!!!!!!!

➺ what to expect; “and don’t lie to me again, please. i’m supposed to have your back and i can’t do my job if you’re hiding things from me.”

➺ currently playing on cee.fm; how sweet it is (to be loved by you) — james taylor 

»»————- 🧸 ————-««

yoongi and y/n get drunk and discuss very important things 

“ah…” you suck in an air of breath through your teeth, patting your chest a few times as the whiskey trickles down your throat

you’re not much of a drinker but yoongi insisted that this was the best whiskey he’d ever had and the only reason why you agreed was because he said if you mixed it with apple juice, it’d just taste like apple juice with a spicier kick 

“you are such a baby.” yoongi snorts, downing the rest of his glass before setting it down on the table, “you don’t have to drink if you don’t want to.”

“i do…” you shake your head, leaning back against the couch, “i don’t, but i also do.”

it’s not often that the two of you spend a sunday evening getting drunk in your apartment but you’ve had a rough week with the business (you’ve had to deal with many, many impatient and annoying customers this week) and yoongi just hasn’t drank in a long time and he recently got paid so why not spend it on some good quality alcohol?? 

“we should play a game or something.” yoongi turns and leans back against the arm of the couch before kicking his legs up onto your lap, “we should do something while waiting for the pizza, otherwise we’re both going to fall asleep.” 

“a game?”

“a game.” yoongi nods, reaching over to crack open the fresh bottle of jameson whiskey (surprisingly smooth, actually. and you do taste the alcohol but you quite like it with the apple juice), “what do drunk people talk about?” 

“they don’t talk. they call their exes.” you joke, yoongi rolling his eyes at your teasing smile

“for your information, i only did it one time. and she didn’t even pick up, so i just left a voicemail. and i don’t even remember what i said in the voicemail.” 

“one time too many.” your eyes widen a little at the reminder of that chaotic night that involved you chasing yoongi around the street trying to get him to give you his phone but his legs are longer and he’s very speedy when he’s drunk so it took you a while until you finally managed to pry his phone from his clammy hands 

love really does make people crazy 

“what’s your biggest fear?” you ask, turning to look at him 

“oh, we’re going to be that type of drunk tonight, are we?” yoongi snorts, reaching up to scratch the side of his nose before pursing his lips in thought and looking up at the ceiling, “probably that i’ll never be good enough in all aspects of my life, but to be honest, mostly when it comes to any romantic stuff. i’m terrified that i’ll try my best with someone and that my best still won’t be good enough for them, and i know i shouldn’t be so dependent on what someone else thinks about me, but if i was dating someone and i felt like i wasn’t good enough for them and then they told me to my face that i wasn’t good enough for them, that would probably send me into the biggest depression spiral i’ve ever had in my entire life. what about you?” 

yoongi looks back down at you to see that you’re staring at him with wide eyes before you reach over to pour some more whiskey into his glass, picking it up and holding it out for him to take 

“…flying cockroaches.” 

“that’s valid.” 

y/n keeps (choosing) to make the same mistake and yoongi’s kinda over it 

“you know, i was just doing some thinking when i was getting the ice cream and i don’t understand,” yoongi shuts the front door behind him before kicking his sneakers off, leaning against the wall with one hand, “didn’t you guys end things, like, a year ago?”

“he reached out in february n we’ve been seeing each other since then…” you sniffle, wiping at your red eyes as you look at him from your curled-up position on the couch, “…didn’t tell you because- i know how you feel about him-“

“he’s a fucking dickhead, that’s how i feel about him. he’s a walking red flag in a very concerning way- like, i have some red flags but they’re the ones that make me seem hot and mysterious, not the ones that make people wonder if i’m a narcissistic sociopath- also, are you telling me you’ve been secretly dating this man for the last-“ yoongi pauses, counting the months on his hands before his eyes widen slightly, “holy shit, you’ve been hiding this from me for the last eight months?” 

you press your lips together as you avert your gaze sheepishly, “…yeah. i’m sorry…” 

“well, what happened this time? why’d you guys break things off?” yoongi plops himself down on the couch next to you, pulling the two pints of ice cream and the cheap wooden spoons out of the thin plastic bag

“he- he was kind of seeing other people at the same time because we never made things exclusive-“

“well, were you seeing anyone else?” 

“no- and… he told me that i wasn’t allowed to see anyone else but he was- so- so basically he started dating-“

“ah, ah-“ yoongi holds the wooden spoon up to shut you up before letting out a laugh, “i’m gonna be so real with you, i don’t feel any sympathy for you at all.”

“i’m not asking for sympathy-“ your voice wavers slightly (you were definitely asking for sympathy and also you fully expected yoongi to come in here and just validate all of your feelings but to be fair you’d probably also feel some type of way if you found out he’d been lying to you for the past eight months of your friendship), “i’m just… sad…” 

“gee whiz, you’re sad because you made a choice to reunite with a known horrible human being!” yoongi exclaims sarcastically, peeling the lid off of the first pint while he shakes his head, “you have to take some accountability here, y/n. it’s not that he forced you to be in this weird relationship with him- and you know, i get it, when you’re reunited with an ex, old feelings come up and yada yada, but you already know the type of person shownu is, so i don’t really know why you’re surprised that being involved with him ended up with you needing emergency pints of ice cream… again. i feel like we’ve had this conversation so many times. it’s getting boring!” 

“i don’t know, yoongi, i thought things would be different…” you mutter, picking at your cuticles, “i thought he’d changed-“

“people rarely change. small habits, maybe, but people rarely change. and you have to take responsibility for the way that you let people treat you, too, because at some point it’s not just because oh yoongi, i was dumb, oh yoongi, i made a mistake, oh yoongi, he seemed so genuine when he was apologising to me — at some point you have to accept the fact that oh, yoongi, maybe i’m the one who has the power to not be crying over a piss-poor human being.” yoongi snaps, turning to look at you with a frown 

he only feels 1% bad when he sees chubby teardrops forming at your waterline and he lets out a quiet sigh before handing you your pint and a spoon, “you know i’m just saying all this shit because we’re friends and i care about you.”

“i know.” you sniffle, taking the pint from him delicately and scraping a little bit of ice cream off the top, “‘m sorry.” 

a moment of silence passes as yoongi gets comfortable with his own pint, his lips pursing as he looks back over at you in all your sad glory 

“i’m sorry things didn’t work out with him. i know you really liked him. but he’s genuinely a horrible person and in the long run, you’re going to be grateful you didn’t end up with someone like that.” he pokes you with his foot to get you to look up at him, “and don’t lie to me again, please. i’m supposed to have your back and i can’t do my job if you’re hiding things from me.” 

yoongi’s really passionate about getting strangers to try y/n’s strawberry cinnamon buns 

“what the hell? these are so good. you should sell these. why don’t you sell these??“ yoongi sucks strawberry glaze off his thumb before his eyes widen, “you could really turn this into a business, you know.”

“i don’t know…” your cheeks flush a little as you wipe flour off the counter, giving him a little shrug, “don’t know if i’ll be successful…” 

you had some spare time today so you decided to whip up a batch of strawberry cinnamon buns (they’re just like regular cinnamon buns except you also add a homemade strawberry compote in the layers, no biggie) and yoongi came over just as they came out of the oven, so you offered him one and obviously he said yes because he’d be crazy to turn down a little treat 

“sure you’ll be successful. you’re really good at baking, and if you start now, you’ll at least have some sort of income after we graduate.” yoongi frowns, “you can’t talk about yourself like that. you have to, like, manifest your success and speak it into existence and all that shit-“ 

“maybe one day…” you purse your lips before offering him another shrug, “i dunno if people’ll like em.” 

“STRAWBERRY CINNAMON BUNS! HOMEMADE STRAWBERRY CINNAMON BUNS-“ that one day comes a lot sooner (as in, this is happening an hour after yoongi suggested you start your own business) and you can’t help but stand off to the side shyly as yoongi continues pushing for people to try your buns

“come on, give this a try and tell me they’re not the most incredible thing you’ve ever put in your mouth-“ yoongi hands someone a free sample in a paper cupcake liner and the stranger looks at it before holding it back for him to take

“this looks great, but i’m allergic to strawberries-“

“well, that’s what your epipen is for, pal-“ yoongi slaps him on the shoulder before pushing him aside and turning his attention to other people, “strawberry cinnamon buns! free samples of homemade strawberry cinnamon buns! get over here and put my friend’s buns in your mouth- oh.” he immediately stops, turning around to look at you, “so sorry, did not mean to sound like i was pimping you off-“ 

you shake your head with a giggle, watching fondly as yoongi spins back around and practically chases someone down to get them to take a free sample from him 

yoongi gets stood up and he’s never seen y/n so upset before 

“who did this to you.” 

yoongi looks up from where he’s sitting on the cobblestone steps to see you standing there, your eyebrows furrowed tightly and your lips set in a tight frown 

if he squints, he’d probably be able to see fumes coming off the top of your head by how upset you seem 

“took you long enough.” he jokes, getting up from his butt and picking up the bouquet of wilted flowers next to him 

he messaged you twenty minutes ago about the situation and you literally got here in warp speed 

“who did this to you?” you ask again, and yoongi shakes his head 

this night has been humiliating enough and he really does not want to go into further details 

“don’t worry about it.” he clears his throat, holding up the bouquet for you to take, “for you, madamoiselle.” 

“you didn’t tell me you were going on a date.” you take the bouquet, bringing it up to your nose for a little sniff before smiling lightly (you love tulips), “love tulips.”

“i know. and it was a second date, technically.” 

“second date??” you ask incredulously, shocked that yoongi hid not one but two important pieces of information from you, “when was the first date??” 

“i didn’t wanna talk about it… i… didn’t wanna get my hopes up in case things didn’t work out and obviously things haven’t worked out.” yoongi shoves his hands into his pockets as he walks alongside you, “whatever, it’s stupid. i hate dating apps.” 

you twist your lips in thought as comfortable silence washes over the two of you 

you know that he’ll probably want to talk about this later, but right now it seems like a bit of a sore spot so maybe you’ll bring in up in a week or so 

or you’ll just wait for him to bring it up to you 

“you hungry?” you loop your arm with his as the two of you walk slowly, and you perk up a little at the sight of a diner two blocks down (they have really good cheesecake there) 

“well, i was supposed to have dinner an hour and forty-five minutes ago, so i guess i’m a little hungry.” yoongi snorts, kicking a pebble off the sidewalk before letting out a huff, “i don’t know. i could eat.” 

“…tuna melt time?” you squeeze his arm and he lets out a loud groan almost immediately 

“oh my god, you are so gross, you know that??” yoongi shoves you off his arm playfully, “who in their right mind likes warm tuna and cheese- you’re basically eating, like, cat vomit-“ yoongi makes a face and you can’t help but laugh, feeling a little better now that you’ve seen him smile a little 

“tuna melt, tuna melt…” you sing softly, yoongi letting out another groan before shuddering

“this could actually be a dealbreaker in our friendship, i’m telling you- only sick freaks like tuna melts-“ 

“guess i’m the sickest freak around, baby-“ 

y/n picked a gross drink from starbucks and refuses to admit she doesn’t like it 

“i still don’t know why you decided to try that.” yoongi shakes his head, holding his wallet out for you to take so you can put it in your purse for him, “what is it again?”

“apple… cinnamon cold brew something?” you shrug, raising the cup for a quick glance before shrugging, “trying something new!” 

“we both know what happens whenever you try something new.” yoongi grumbles, taking a sip of his own iced americano, “you try it, you don’t like it, you refuse to admit you don’t like it, and somehow i’m the one who ends up having to finish whatever it is you picked for yourself because you decided you wanted to be spontaneous.”

“nuh-uh.” you frown, yoongi holding the door open for you as he rolls his eyes 

you can be such a baby when it comes to arguments like this — it’s like you never want to admit he’s right even though you know he’s right 

“nuh-uh-“ he mocks, barely avoiding your whack as the two of you walk side by side, “the pineapple-walnut scone from that gluten-free bakery, that weird alfredo-truffle-pesto pasta dish you ordered when we went to get italian on valentine’s day, that godawful cauliflower crust pizza you got for brunch one time-“ 

“but i like this drink!” you take a hearty sip before swallowing, your lips puckering for a second as your eye twitches and you immediately stop walking to look at the drink

…perhaps the barista was having an off day but there’s something a lil funky going on in your mouth right now 

“oh my god, i fucking knew it-“ yoongi groans, his shoulder slumping as he looks at you with a raised brow, “who in their right mind would order an apple cinnamon cold brew something-“

“it’s not bad!” you insist, bringing it up to your lips for another sip, your other eye twitching now as you swallow thickly 

oh dear god 

is it supposed to be chunky?? are drinks normally chunky like this??? 

“just give it to me.” yoongi gives you a deadpan expression as he holds his iced americano for you to take, “take mine.” 

“no, no-“

“y/n y/l/n, give me your godawful drink right now-“ 

“are you sure?”

“are you sure?” yoongi mocks again, tsking at you when you take his drink from him and he takes your drink from you, “i knew this was gonna happen, and i still let you order your own drink… the next time we’re at starbucks, i’m ordering for you-“ 

🎙️ ask y/n for her strawberry cinnamon bun recipe (talk to my characters!) 

📚 why not explore the rest of the library while you're here? (go say hi to yoongi and y/n in la vie en bonsai!) 

💫 or perhaps you want something shorter to read? (drabbles and mini series!)

🌟 or something even shorter? (teeny tidbits!) 

[trashytoastboi]

Day of Eternity - Solomon

~SFW Alphabet~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

🔮 He’s a mix between being teasing and intimate with his affection. At first you thought he was just trying to see your reaction every time he would pull you into a sudden hug, or steal a little kiss and smile at how adorable you’d be when you’re all flustered from it. Other times it’s more intentional, gentle and intimate. He’s soft and loving about it. He’d interlock his fingers with yours, hold you, or sometimes offer his arm like a gentleman when you walk side by side. Solomon can say some of the sweetest things and just likes being near you in general. 

B = Best Friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

🔮 He’s the type of best friend that’s always there for you, the kind who is first on your mind if you know you need help and want someone reliable there for you. He goes above and beyond for you with no complaint. He’s made all the bad decisions before so you don’t have to and will impart all his knowledge and lessons on you to prevent any mistakes. Some activities you can expect to do together include misadventures, sightseeing, experimenting with magic and studying, sneaking off to the human world for a little food and maybe arcade games. 

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle) 

🔮 Deemed himself a non-enjoyer of cuddles, you managed to change his mind. He didn’t desire that level of intimacy from casual partners and it became the norm. Solomon just assumed it had something to do with him and that’s why he didn’t like it. Until the two of you started dating, he found he is really appreciative of the closeness it brings and how peaceful it feels in your arms. Doesn’t mind being the little spoon, he just wants to be close and laying with you can ease a lot of his day to day stress. 

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?) 

🔮 -3/10 for the love of gods, demons, and cthulhu do not let this man near the kitchen. Not unless you’ve got a death wish or want to be accused of aiding in domestic terrorism with those deadly weapons he calls meals. Honestly you don’t understand how he can’t cook… he’s had ample time to learn, and his potions always taste delicious. He can even flavour them to mask the questionable ingredients but he’s utterly hopeless with food. Cleaning is easy since Solomon just cheats it and uses magic to do it for him. As for settling down, Solomon desired that before immortality, but now his desire to settle down with you is accompanied by a fear of losing you to time. 

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

🔮 Sombre…Solomon is straight to the point about the break up, he articulates his point gently enough that it doesn't come across as callous or uncaring. He’s hurt, and regretting that things didn’t work out. It hurts deeply for him when he’s opened up enough to trust you so intimately when he believed he was beyond the point of being able to. Solomon thinks he’s good at hiding his feelings but they’re written all over his face and you can see how hurt he is. 

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quickly would they want to get married.)

🔮 Solomon is wholly committed to you as it is, and he does possess a desire to make it official. He’s got his concerns, namely being immortal. He’s closed himself off as a result because loss was inevitable, and he didn’t want that. To put himself through that kind of hurt. You have a different view on things though and rather look at the good than the bad, to embrace the wonder instead of the fear. So yes, in the end he does hold the wish to get married to you. 

G = Gentle (How gentle are they? Both physically and emotionally.)

🔮 Solomon can be known as quite the devious character depending on who you ask, and even a thoughtless person with no concern for anyone else. You can’t believe that though because he’s always been kind and courteous to you even when you were strangers, and steadily evolved to friendship and then eventually partners. Solomon treats you preciously, always has. The only time he’s hurt you…is with his cooking 😔 it wasn’t intentional but you were convinced you were gonna die. Solomon was right by your side taking care of you though. 

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?) 

🔮 Solomon’s hugs are always different and indicative of his mood. If he’s happy he’d give you one of those squeezing glomps, might pick you up and twirl you around if he wanted. When he’s sad he’ll kind of slump on you, keeping his arms wrapped around you without saying a word and nuzzling into your neck like a very sad koala. If he’s in a more flirtatious mood, he’ll wrap his arms around your waist and hold you close. 

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-Word) 

🔮 Would say it jokingly, you’d do something nice for him and he’d respond with a “You know I love you right?” or saying something like “This is why I love you.” It was cute, still made your heartbeat a little faster but it felt like it lacked a certain depth to it. Solomon got used to concealing himself under false smiles and pretty words. You never rushed him, even when you would tell him you love him and he’d smile in response without replying, you knew it stemmed from his own hesitation and you didn’t force it…and when he was sure you had fallen asleep, he’d kiss your forehead and whisper his love for you. 

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they're jealous?) 

🔮 Sulky type of jealous, he does get jealous but it’s not wrathful or nasty. He’ll pout, sulk and outright tell you that he’s jealous for whatever reason. He tells you because you usually give him a little bit of pampering afterwards. He thinks he should get jealous more often (or pretend to be). If it’s the case of someone hitting on you, trying to get your number or something. Solomon is so quick to just walk up to, kiss you on the cheek and ask what business that person has with his partner. 

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

🔮 In public Solomon gives you little smooches and pecks. Your forehead, your hand, your lips, cheek. All popular smooch places, Solomon even uses them whenever he greets you, and sometimes when he randomly wants to show his affection for his precious partner. In more private settings is where Solomon gets a little more daring, his kisses last longer and are a bit more passionate. They’re intense and slow, and he’ll smile into the kiss a lot when he feels you kissing him back. 

L = Little Ones (How are they around children?)

🔮 He’s good at hiding his feelings, so you honestly don’t know if he likes them or not. He’s all smiles when he interacts with his kids, he’s patient and even if they’re trying to upset Solomon he’ll laugh it off and appear unaffected. The only thing you have noticed is that it’s a bit draining for him. It exhausts him quickly (you can only recognise the signs because you know him so well.) As for others he appears pretty much the same. 

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

🔮 He struggles to get up and has to set some pretty insistent alarms to get him up for the day. He’s a little bit of a grump and not a real ray of sunshine, if he sees your face his face will light up a bit. Wants to laze around in bed with you for just a little longer. Should you deny his plea for snuggles, he'll be grumpy the whole day. Once he’s fully awake then he’s quick to get ready and he’ll insist on making you breakfast- thank god Simeon and Luke usually take breakfast duty. You and Solomon will set the table and do the dishes together afterwards. 

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

🔮 Solomon likes quiet nights, he’ll spend time studying or researching. Maybe working on a new magic item or potion- there’s always more to learn, and revisit what he’s forgotten. If he’s not busy with that then he’s teaching you more about magic, he’s your master in the pursuit of the magic arts after all. Solomon is a good teacher, and you appreciate his constant patience. Some nights Solomon would just want to relax and he’ll convince you to laze around with him while talking about random things. You love hearing him recount historical events and learning about what details were covered up, changed or lost to history. 

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while and reveal things slowly?)

🔮 He’s an onion, he’s got layers. Things that he had no problem sharing. Common knowledge that everyone knows. Those layers act as diversions to conceal the things beneath them. You took the time to carefully unravel the layers, without intruding and without scaring Solomon. You waited for him to reciprocate and feel comfortable with you until he entrusted you with his innermost thoughts, fears and the things that he feels he’s forgotten about himself.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?) 

🔮 He’s had many years to learn the art of anger management and patience. In most situations he doesn’t get angry, annoyed at most but even then he won’t act on it. He’ll get over it. His real anger comes when people try to hurt you. No matter who it is, he’s willing to erase them from existence and when it comes to you he just doesn’t get angry. In the height of the most heated argument he doesn’t get angered, he’ll get annoyed if he feels you’re being stubborn on a point that could result in you endangering yourself. 

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing or they kind of or forget everything?) 

🔮 Solomon does a good job of remembering everything about you. The things you say- he’s a little paranoid that he’ll forget things and he journals a lot. Living a long time means he’s bound to forget eventually. The passage of time is unforgiving like that but he writes the important things about you, the little things, everything. So he can always remember. 

R = Remember (What is their favourite moment in your relationship?)

🔮 Call him a little menace but it’s probably the moment the two of you announce your relationship to your close friends. Some people already knew and weren’t surprised but he wanted to laugh when seeing the shocked expressions of those who didn’t pick up on it. Most importantly Solomon just liked being able to be there with you, holding your hand while getting the blessings from your closest people (even though some were given a bit begrudgingly). Solomon hid his nervousness and you picked up on it, while no one else knew you were soothing him and he thought that was so endearing. 

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

🔮 Solomon is very protective and he’s not lowkey about it. He’d make you a ring- a protective talisman, here’s a necklace, and a charm to put on your D.D.D or your bag. Just have it on you at all times. With your permission of course, you’ve allowed Solomon to place magic circles on your body for just that added layer of protection; the Devildom can be unpredictable at the best of times. Sometimes you’d call him overprotective but he’s never restricted you from what you want to do.  

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

🔮 Always puts effort into everything for the two of you, but mostly you. Solomon always wants to surprise you with a nice home cooked meal, or a breakfast in bed (You love him but food poisoning is not the way), his gifts are unique, nearly always handmade and something meaningful that will have a deeper meaning to you. Solomon remembers anniversaries and he does do a lot of impromptu dates at home. 

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

🔮 Secretive. He’s secretive and won’t say anything if he’s struggling or going through something. He’ll go out of his way to make you think everything is fine, you know Solomon well enough to see it as a dead giveaway. It’s hard to get him to talk to you when he’s in this phase and he isolates himself emotionally and won’t feel present. You understand and give him his space but are there to support and comfort him. 

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?) 

🔮 He’s not very vain, his appearance hasn’t changed much in years and he feels that he’s memorized it at this point. His vanity can rather be considered as curiosity because Solomon does often ask you how he would look if he was to dye his hair, maybe get piercings or tattoos. If he doesn’t like them he could just remove them. Maybe a wardrobe change? Sometimes goes through full style overhauls just to experiment. 

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

🔮 He’d feel empty and lost, a concept he thought he had gotten used to. He explains how after many years one begins to feel hollow, but you’ve stopped that feeling. You make him feel pleasure for everyday and the time spent with you is valuable beyond words. If you weren’t around he’d revert back to what he calls a meaningless and aimlessly drifting existence.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them)

🔮 Takes a lot of pictures and videos of you two (mostly you), he commemorates the memories. Scrapbooking has become quite a fun little hobby for him where he keeps all his important and favorite pictures of all the time spent with precious people, friendly acquaintances, some places he’s traveled. He writes a lot, detailing the date, place and his thoughts when he visited that place the first time. 

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn't like, either in general or in a partner?)

🔮 Total reluctance to try anything new - Life is short (for most) and Solomon can understand trepidation and restriction, but people with the means to do things and choose never to try anything new, see a new place, or try a new food. He doesn’t understand it, he’s eager to explore and learn, and experience new things. It might kill his enthusiasm a little if his partner restricted him and stopped him from doing so because they refuse to try anything new. 

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?) 

🔮 Kicks the blankets off all the time and will wake himself up when he’s cold. He’s a restless sleeper and it can explain why he’s always kicking things off. You’ve gotten used to his tossing and turning. Solomon thinks he’s a peaceful sleeper, in spite of you telling him otherwise. He’s trying to work on it. 

Taglist: @completelyshatteredbrokenmschf @roninfromtheops

[thecuriousquest]

Could you please write a manipulative Yandere Armin x Reader!

The Art of Manipulation

Tag List: @issamomma @repostingmyfavs @chickennugnugnug

Warnings: Yandere themes, manipulation, slow mind break kind of, paranoia, very tame and SFW

Master List here.

—————————————————————————

⚔️He manipulates you in an unsuspecting way. It’s deceitful, inconspicuous, like an art he has mastered.

⚔️He doesn’t physically manipulate you like Levi would. He would never hurt you, would never break your bones or stomp your stomach in to get you to say “I love you”.

⚔️He starts rather slow. Intercepting you at times when he knows you’re sad and alone. He “comforts” you. He holds you closely. His hand drifting lazily over your hip as you lean on his shoulder, venting or sobbing. You barely feel it, mistaking it as his hand only slipping because you don’t feel it linger for more than a moment or two.

⚔️He makes you feel heard. He makes you feel less lonely. He makes you feel cared about.

⚔️It’s an amazing feeling.

⚔️You appreciate him being there to listen to you because you didn’t feel comfortable talking to anyone else about what’s bothering you.

⚔️“I just didn’t want to be a burden.”

⚔️“Y/N, you could never be a burden! You’re amazing!”

⚔️He puts a smile on your face as you wipe your tears away, gently giggling as you blush from the compliment.

⚔️Soon enough, Armin always seems to be around after you have been scolded/hit by Captain Levi. He always seems to be around when Horseface pushes you out of the way like an arrogant asshole.

⚔️You don’t mind it, though. You welcome it, and you start to develop feelings for the guy that reaches a little beyond friendship.

⚔️His process is slow. Bit by bit, building up until he’s someone you become dependent upon. You rarely speak to anyone aside from Armin now because you don’t regard any of your fellow soldiers as real friends.

⚔️If they’re my friends, why don’t any of them try to talk to me like Armin does? I didn’t even have to ask him to listen to me. He just did!

⚔️And just like that, he has you in the palm of his hand.

[itsabouttimex2]

Amazing job at writing the new part as always! It flows nicely and you can easily tell how familiar Macaque & MC without making him OOC. Honestly i admire your grasp at these characters and ability of doing something as complex as interactive series. I'm kinda curious how do you plan things and how far ahead but only if you want to share it ofc.

Going back to the actually piece- it actually made me look up the meanings of flowers despite the original thought of it only being because of the color association. Two first flowers have pretty easy and basic meaning. I can see why the edgy (/affectionate) mentor wouldn't want them near his home.

Freesia - friendship trust innocence

yellow roses - friendship, joy and similar stuff

The one choosen by Macaque are a little more interesting.

Tansies - immortality, resistance, "I declare against you", sometimes used in medicine

black dahlias - (warning of) betrayal, sadness, (not specified black ones: dignity, good luck, elegance)

I'm guessing the tansies are about him being bitter about the Wukong and their more practical use. Black dahlias could be about Monkey King but also some kind of foreshadowing depending on our choice. Or I'm reading into it too much.

Hopefully I'm not overthinking it or completely missing the point (and if i am, I'm really,really sorry). Just wanted to share it in case other readers didn't look it up + i know some people like to see their work analysed but if i'm going to far please let me know! Have a good day/night! :]

(Sorry for any mistakes and feel free to delete the ask)

Oh my god, thank you so much! That’s such a sweet thing to say! (Please never stop analyzing my work I put a lot of effort into it💜💜)

🌻🌻I’ll start with flowers: you are right on the money here. Freesia especially are bright and colorful blooms, coming in many different gorgeous colors. Yellow roses are just the same, bright and cheery and so similar to the sun.

And, given that freesia come in orange and yellow… it’s possible the potted plants were a living reminder of Sun Wukong that Macaque finally got sick of and ripped apart. Or he just took advantage of someone else shredding the innocent flowers and took something that Y/N worked hard on and changed it to his liking instead. (Written to be ambiguous as to which scenario occurred.)

Notably, the new flowers not only match his own personal feelings, but even his color scheme! Yellow, then red and black. Twice over do these flowers symbolize him, something he took and changed to make more suitable to his tastes and feelings.

But he’s not the one who takes care of them- no, it’s Y/N who is dedicated to seeing them grow.

His student tending and nurturing the flowers that represent Macaque, while Macaque destroys/allows the destruction of the flowers that represent his student. Huh. Funny.

Okay flower rant done.🌻🌻

Macaque is such an interesting character to write, given that there’s a spike of cruelty barbing out from almost every action he takes. I think a lot of people have forgotten that the man hasn’t had a redemption arc in canon- he displays zero regret for, say… manipulating and trying to kill MK. Or leveling the Dragon Palace of the East Sea. Or assaulting Tang, a strict non-combatant. Or holding Mei’s life hostage.

He doesn’t feel bad for doing any of these. If he does, he’s keeping tight-lipped about it. No apologies. No direct atonement.

And even on the extremely rare circumstance that he’s being “kind”, like deciding to stop torturing MK in Shadowplay, it comes across as almost “I’m bored with you, you aren’t fun anymore.”

He’s not a good guy. So even with Y/N, who he genuinely does care for, there’s this level of manipulation.

Like, he calls Y/N adorable, which sounds nice… but there’s almost a level of victim-blaming to it. No matter how roundabout his words, Macaque basically says to his own student: “If you looked different, people wouldn’t bother you, so let me change the way you look.”

And they trust him enough to agree.

Or letting them cook in fear outside his door when he’s clearly near enough to open it, but dropping the act when they start to break down.

He’s such an interesting character to write ugh I love it.

I had a lot of the routes planned pretty far out, actually, and I’ll give a few examples of what was planned:

Spider Demon Y/N was sort of naive and excitable, but was going to mature/sour after realizing that their beloved queen was, in fact, the bad guy. They were going to have to come to terms with her necessary defeat and their own part in betraying her, as well as living on after you’ve cut ties to your family. Then, readers were going to be able to pick one other henchman to convince to join the heroes.

Dragon Y/N was going to have to both gain Ao Guang’s (their father) approval to live on the surface, and decide how they felt about MK possessing the Ruyi Jingu Bang. They fought using two strings of beaded pearls, utilizing them as whips and grappling hooks to maneuver around the battle field. Also, they hated Macaque. Genuinely throwing hands on sight if they saw that edgy rat.

Heir/Proxy Y/N was going to be a pretty miserable and clingy person, having spent most of their life alone on account of both the LBD and Mayor’s influence. Overcoming their fears and anxieties of being unlovable was going to be a massive part of the journey, learning to love themself and be loved in turn. They were going to have to learn to master the powers forcibly implanted into their body, trying to prevent themself from being sacrificed for power to aid LBD’s onwards path to ‘destiny’.

Ne Zha’s Y/N was going to be cute and polite, very excited to explore the mortal realm outside the grasp of their overprotective mentor/brother. They were also going to have to deal with the first two lotus princes (also overprotective) and Ao Bing, who served as a dear friend.

Sun Wukong’s Y/N was going to be his estranged child who was bitter over ML inheriting the staff instead of them. They were going to despise him for never training them, having to find masters and teachers elsewhere all across the world. In turn, he was desperately trying to make amends and reestablish a strong bond with his cherished progeny, hoping to reconnect eventually.

Also Mei was going to call Y/N “Broth-Face”.

[simpforwebtoonmen]

I see dead people || Daniel x reader

˚✧₊⁎ Daniel Park thinks he saw a ghost, a.k.a you. He goes to his friends for advice and they claim to have seen the same thing. ⁎⁺˳✧༚

Warnings: not proofread and is pretty long.

a/n: This isn’t really a Daniel x reader in a romantic sense, but more like a new blossoming friendship. Also, this might turn into a series depending on how people like this😓.

Daniel Park had to stay after school for cleaning duty. He was wiping the board clean when he heard a series of ‘clacks’ followed by a gasp. He quickly turned around to see a person standing next to the mops and brooms that had fallen onto the ground. And as quickly as he saw them, they disappeared. into thin air. Like they weren’t there to begin with.

Daniel stood in place for a moment, his jaw to the floor and his hands gripped onto whatever cleaning supplies he had in his hands. And then the next moment, he grabbed his belongings and bolted out of the classroom and didn’t stop running until he made it home.

The next morning came and a sense of dread took over. He didn’t want to go to school in fear of seeing the ghost again. But he couldn’t miss school because of it, he worked hard to get into the school. And he couldn’t tell anybody about it because they’d think he was crazy.

So, Daniel Park had no choice but to go to school.

He sat himself in his desk, his movement was rigid and stiff. Everyone could immediately tell that something was wrong. Multiple people had approached him and asked him what was wrong, but they only got silence in return.

Daniel flinched and whimpered when he felt a pressure on his shoulder. He looked to see that was only Jay trying to catch his attention. He sighed in relief but saw the frown on Jay’s face. “hm? Is something wrong, Jay? I’m acting weird? Did something happen? O-Oh, I guess you could say that…” Daniel looked away from his friend in shame, he hadn’t realized that he was being so obvious.

But to his mistake, he saw the ghost again. They stood at one of the classroom windows, the top half of their head peaked out as they stared directly at Daniel.

He let out a shriek, flinching back into Jay’s embrace. He saw the ghost flinch as well, their head ducking down beneath the window and disappearing once more.

After a moment of recollecting himself, a series of back rubs from Jay as well as Jay shooting glares from behind his bangs to anyone who dared to approach Daniel in his stressed out state. Daniel convinced himself that maybe that ghost person didn’t disappear yesterday but instead ran away so quickly that it seemed like they disappeared.

Morning classes end and lunch starts. Daniel abruptly stood from his seat and stormed out of the classroom. For half an hour, Daniel searched the halls and classrooms for this mysterious person. But to his luck, he didn’t find them.

He slumps against a random wall in the hallway. He sighed out defeatedly, tilting his head back enough that it hit against the wall. He stared upward as he began to think. Perhaps it was in his imagination. He probably wasn’t getting enough sleep and/or was stressed enough to begin seeing things.

“You alright, man?” A familiar voice asked him. Daniel looked back down to see Vasco looking at him with a concerned look. “I heard that you’ve been freaked out by something the entire morning, is something wrong?” He asked.

Daniel only nodded his head, denying anything and everything. He was going to tell Vasco that everything was okay, but then he thought about it. Maybe Vasco knows something, he’s been here longer than Daniel. Plus, Vasco wouldn’t think of him as crazy since he was a bit…childish, in the nicest way possible.

“Actually, yeah…have you maybe seen someone around…like someone who can just suddenly disappear?” Daniel tried explaining without making himself sound crazy. Vasco’s eyes widened with surprise and fear, “U-Uh- yeah! You’ve been seeing them too!?” Vasco asked rather loudly, jumping closer to Daniel.

“Seeing who? What the hell are you two up to now?” Another familiar voice spoke up. The two boys look over to see Zack in his standard bad boy pose, one hand in his front pocket while his other hand held something, in this case, a chocolate bar.

“A ghost! have you been seeing a ghost around too!?” Vasco jumped in before Daniel could. Daniel was sure that Zack would just call them crazy but instead he saw a surprised look on his face that then turned into fear. “N-No way…is it someone with (color) hair, (color) skin, and (pants/skirt) uniform!” Zack described.

Now all of them stood in fear, realizing that they weren’t crazy after all and that there is a ghost roaming around the school.

-

“Alright, I had Jace do some research- here are some of the students that had passed away while attending J High School,” Vasco laid out a series of files on his desk. All three of them looked through the files, taking good looks at the pictures shown.

In the end, none of them could recognize a single person.

“Ugh! This was a waste of damn time!” Zack groaned out. He threw himself into Vasco’s chair, slumped and had his arms crossed over his chest all while frowning/pouting.

“Maybe they aren’t from this school…” Daniel suggested. “Or maybe there is no ghost in the first place,” Jace chimed in. He sat in his own desk and was observing the trio go through the files.

At this point, they started to think that Jace was right.

-

Your pov

Ever since you moved to this school you were curious of the people in different departments.

During the afternoon, you would only peak into the classrooms to see if anyone was there.

First, you saw Zack. He was just sitting at his desk, not doing the chores he was supposed to do. You were only staring for a second, but when Zack looked at you, you got startled and made yourself disappear.

As you ran away, you could hear his chair screeching against the floor as well as fall.

Second, you saw Vasco. He seemed to be looking for something in his classroom when you passed by. Instinctively, you approached him and offered to help him. Though, you could only say ‘hey’ before he screamed and jumped back, falling onto the floor. His sudden scream made you scream as well and instinctively, you disappeared.

As you ran away, you cursed at yourself for disappearing again after telling yourself that you wouldn’t do it again.

And third, Daniel Park. He was humming a lovely tune as you walked past his classroom. You couldn’t help but feel entranced and you walked into the classroom without thinking. Accidentally, you kicked down a couple of mops and brooms that laid against the wall. Looking back up, you saw Daniel with his jaw hung low. Then suddenly, he gathered his things and bolted out of the classroom.

Confused, you looked down at yourself and saw your translucent body. You groaned and cursed at yourself for doing it again. After that, you decided to start heading home right after school instead of sticking around, knowing that it wouldn’t end well for you.

-

It was lunch time and you were sitting at your desk with your iPad, working on another art piece. Suddenly, a shadow loomed over you and everything became dark.

You looked up to see piercing eyes glaring down at you. You gasped as you recognized who it was.

“So this is where you’ve been hiding…in the animation room,” Daniel said in a low tone. His presence alone was incredibly intimidating.

“a-ah…” the words were stuck in your throat, even though you had nothing to say. You were stuck and didn’t know what to do. Did he find out that it was you who was spying on him?

His eyebrows began to furrow, “so what are you…if not a ghost?” he asked.

-

“I died two weeks ago. My physical body is six feet underground but somehow i’m still…here,” you explained as best as you could.

The two of you decided to talk things out after school when everyone was gone. He saw you disappear before his own eyes and saw you once again when you went back to check (spy) in on him. You didn’t think he’d see you, but unfortunately he did. And now you felt as if you owed him an explanation.

Daniel hummed as he thought, “hm, you seem very…physical to me?” he poked you with his index finger and as expected, it didn’t go through you. Instead, he felt skin and the muscles underneath.

“Yeah, I’m confused about that as well. I can turn invisible whenever I want and I can also form a physical body but I can also be…not physical? Here- give me your hand,” without looking for permission, you took his hand and brought it up to your own. Once his hand got close enough, he was expecting to feel your skin once more, but instead his hand straight through yours and suddenly your hand looked transparent.

Surprised, he yanked his hand back and whimpered. You were surprised yourself by his sudden actions. You had never revealed this secret to anyone else, so you figured that this was a normal reaction to it.

You chuckled, “sorry, that was probably really freaky, huh?” He snapped out of his trance and nodded his head, “no no! It’s not freaky! Well, I mean it is…but I was more surprised than freaked out!” he fumbled as he tried to cover up for himself. You shook your head and smiled in amusement, “you don’t need to lie, I mean, I was pretty freaked out myself.”

“Heh, I suppose that makes sense. Oh, what about your parents? Do they know about this?” Daniel suddenly asked. You were taken back by the question but quickly recollected yourself, “no…they’re still in (home country). Just…how am I supposed to tell them that their dead child isn’t actually dead, ya’ know?”

Daniel nodded, “yeah I get what you mean…” He said absentmindedly. You tilted your head in confusion, “you do…?”

He perks up and realized his mistake, “o-oh! ah- well…since we’re sharing secrets and all…”

-

“You have two bodies!?”

“Shhh! not so loud, please!”

[stuckinapril]

i'm really struggling with letting go of people and not vilanizing myself. like if they chose to cut me from their life then i must be a bad guy? :( tbh i was just wondering if u had any advice in regards to this?

The simple truth is people are imperfect and will not always make their decisions based off an objective assessment of who you are as a person. Some people just choose the easy way out (avoiding conflict) by cutting you off completely, bc that’s much easier than deliberating over a problem and handling it in a well-rounded way. What makes this even worse is the fact that that kind of thinking is romanticized by pop psychology advice these days—cutoff culture is bigger now more than ever, even when it’s not necessarily the answer. It gets packaged as a confident, no-nonsense approach; the reality is that some people are too weak (or maybe just not emotionally intelligent enough) to deal w your/their feelings. So they remove you from their life altogether.

Obviously I don’t think this is always the ethical thing to do. Sometimes it is the right call to cut someone from your life, but in typical tiktok fashion, people have taken this too far and misapplied it to relationships that simply deserve more than that. You don’t owe everyone everything, but you do owe some people a form of explanation as to why you’re literally terminating them from your life. It depends on the degree of closeness and the situation that instigated the rift to begin with. Deciding when to cut off and when to communicate is an important skill to have—but not a lot of people have it.

Another possibility is just that you did cross their boundaries, you did something you weren’t supposed to do, it was hurtful enough to warrant this recourse, etc… and in that case you have no choice but to review your behavior, vow to yourself not do it again, and move on. This is your first time being alive. Not your second or your third. You’re bound to make mistakes. Everyone is. That’s where healthy self-compassion comes in: with recognizing these mistakes, but with not beating yourself up for them forever. It may read as cliche, but you’re literally human & mistakes are literally unavoidable. It’s when you refuse to adapt your behavior and move on that issues arise.

If you don’t grant yourself the gift of forgiveness, you’ll find it impossible to forgive anybody else. Be graceful and patient w yourself, but don’t make a habit of repeating mistakes. And don’t ruminate on something that’s in the past. There are 8 billion out there and an abundance of friendships to make. Just because it didn’t work out with someone, doesn’t mean it won’t work out with the countless other people you have a chance of meeting and forming a wonderful connection with

[hoppipolla]

Alcohol and characterisation in The Eighth Sense

Alcohol is a recurring theme in The Eighth Sense.

In everyone’s imagery, alcohol is an inherent part of the college experience due to alcohol often acting as a social lubricant.

If alcohol is usually seen as the embodiment of excess, irresponsibility and carelessness, it isn’t always the case. In literature and cinema, alcohol is also used to shed a light on the complexity of the human condition.

Alcohol can either help the characters release their inhibitions and allow them to be vulnerable, or it can destroy emotional bonds and relationships because the characters’ loss of control under the influence of alcohol makes them say or do things they can’t take back or undo.

What I love about The Eighth Sense is how nuanced and accurate they are in showing how life is. Whether it be the way they portray friendships, seemingly mundane conversations etc., everything feels authentic because it is never two-dimensional. The same goes with alcohol. T8S subtlety highlights how alcohol is a force that can either be destructive or positive depending on the person we’re talking about.

Not only is T8S detailed in their representations, but it also brilliantly uses alcohol as a means of characterisation in the sense that whenever drinks are shared, poured etc., a lot is said about the characters.

Episode 1

Not only did the opening scene amazingly foreshadow what is going to happen next in the most beautiful yet confusing way (for now), the following scenes efficiently set the tone of the series.

One of the first scenes of episode 1 takes place in the pork’s place Ji Hyun works in. At every table, drinks are poured and shared since we’re in a university bar/restaurant after all. The camera lingers at every table and the discussions we overhear contribute at drawing a nuanced portrait of how alcohol is used to either cope with a situation or allow more personal conversations to take place.

A girl who’s been recently dumped is seen in a drunk state and her friend’s comment informs us that her drinking habits might have been the reason she got dumped in the first place. Alcohol is introduced as a paradoxical form of escapism: it numbs your pain only to bring you back to a harsher reality.

At another table, a guy who’s failed his interview complains about it to his friend who clumsily tries to show his support. Alcohol functions here in a positive capacity for it allows this one guy to vent his feelings and release tension. His friend can easily empathise with him because he has experienced the same kind of failures – alcohol thus helps people emotionally connect with one another.  

Before talking about Jae Won’s table, let’s talk about Ji Hyun for a bit.

Ji Hyun is a newcomer in every sense of the word. The starting point of his adult life was reached when he decided to leave his hometown to go to college in Seoul. Everything feels new to him – both the newly-acquired freedom he now has as a young adult but also the code of the city. He has a lot to take in but he’s doing a great job.

It makes sense that, in this scene, Ji Hyun is seen struggling to keep up with the restaurant’s effervescence – his boss tells him which tables to serve next and asks him to hurry a bit. He still needs some guidance. However, his unfamiliarity is reinforced by the “mistake” he makes when bringing another bottle of soju to the table with the three girls. It might look like a mistake of little consequence – and it is in a way – but it immediately singles Ji Hyun out and places him as an outsider, as someone who is still learning to navigate his way through the city.

Interestingly enough, Jae Won is also placed as an outsider because of his return from the military. Although Ji Hyun’s and Jae Won’s situations are completely different, they are both adjusting to an unfamiliar environment.

Now on to Jae Won’s table. To Jae Won and his so-called friends, alcohol menaces their identity or the image they’ve built for themselves. In episode 4, we learn that Tae Hyung is the teacher’s assistant meaning he must be someone the teachers trust. I’m assuming he must be a diligent student although his behaviour, so far, has been saying otherwise. I’m saying all this because although he is a good student (let’s assume he is although it’s quite hard to believe given what we’ve seen of him), he has a real inferiority complex. He feels deeply threatened by Jae Won because of his self-discipline and his family situation. His inferiority complex is only ever visible when he is in a drunken state. (I’ll talk about it a bit more later on in this analysis.)

If alcohol clearly is a destructive force when it comes to Tae Hyung, it isn’t the same for Jae Won. He drinks alcohol because that’s what college students do. He drinks because his friends drink. He drinks because that’s what socially acceptable for someone his age. Jae Won’s attitude towards alcohol highlights how much alcohol has become an almost necessary means to socialise in our society. In most cases, telling people that you don’t drink alcohol automatically makes them think that you’re either not trying hard enough to fit in or that you’re just not fun. But these are social constructs – you can have a fun college experience without drinking alcohol for instance – and Yoon Won perfectly emphasises that fact when she tells Tae Hyung to keep the “shitty tradition” to himself in episode 3(cf. the campfire scene when Tae Hyung is preparing the penalty drink.). Drinking alcohol in college has become a tradition and traditions are socially constructed and established.

Although Jae Won has come to develop a drinking habit, I don’t think he’s ever lost complete control of himself when drinking. Throughout episode 1, he repeatedly tells Tae Hyung to drink less and even tells Ji Hyun to “not drink too much” with his boss. Just like he is very attentive to the image he conveys to others and to the impressions he gives off, he wants to keep things under control. People expect him to be the “worry-free” cool guy and such a person shouldn’t be seen overwhelmed with deep emotions, both released and muddled by alcohol.

The restaurant scene gives us an overview of how alcohol influences people’s behaviours and it does so by providing us a rather polarised overview. Alcohol either makes you lose control of yourself (Tae Hyung pushing Jae Won to the ground for instance) or it can help create/develop emotional connections (the two guys talking about their failed interviews).

The rest of episode 1 then qualifies this statement with the character of Ji Hyun’s boss with whom drinking is not about being destructive or positive but about quality time.

It’s sweet how Jae Won directly acknowledges the fact that Ji Hyun does have friends once Ji Hyun tells him that he is planning to drink with his boss (see end of episode 1). By doing so, Jae Won confirms the idea mentioned previously saying that alcohol creates emotional bonds and that sharing drinks can be interpreted as quality time.   

Ji Hyun’s boss is a kind of parental figure to Ji Hyun: not exactly like a mother because she acts friendlier but her experience and the pieces of advice she gives him make him value her opinion. She’s a sort of lighthouse to him. He comes to see her on his day off because he doesn’t want to be alone in his room. She gives him a sense of home and safety which he hasn’t been able to find ever since he left the countryside he grew up in. 

Drinking with her is easy and it feels comfortable. It allows them to talk about their experience and share a bit of themselves.

Episode 2

The Free Bird lil’ trip to the beach is a means to get everyone to know each other and to introduce surfing to the freshmen. Usually, whenever you’re new to a club or when you’ve just entered college, you have to go through a fresher initiation and, more often than not, this initiation rite includes alcohol.

Jae Won warns Ji Hyun that he’ll most likely have to drink a lot since he’s a freshman and suggests that he should get some sleep while he still can – he also gives him a hungover drink after their surfing session. (“Everyone is going to make the freshmen super drunk.”) Ji Hyun had a feeling this would happen and I love how firm he was with his answer: “I can decide not to drink.”

As seen in episode 1, Ji Hyun doesn’t hate drinking but when he drinks, it’s because he wants to. He doesn’t want to give in to peer pressure nor does he seek to amaze everyone by getting drunk. Drinking implies quality time to Ji Hyun, hence the scene where we see him alone on the beach at night, listening to music, with a can of beer next to him. He is alone with his thoughts and alcohol feels like a nice companion to have in such times.   

As I’ve said before, Jae Won likes being in control and it shows in the way he behaves and the way he drinks. In episode 1, he begs his friends to drink moderately. Not alcohol-related but in episode 2, he tells everyone to be careful when going surfing (“Safety comes first.”). Jae Won always strives to make things go smoothly. This is in keeping with his habit of masking: he doesn’t want to upset anyone so he indulges them and by doing so, he is not able to show his authentic self.  

If drinking is seen as a social lubricant thus enabling someone to fit in, the way you drink is also important. In episode 1, Tae Hyung mocks Jae Won for not drinking whatever he was drinking down in one. This suggests that even your drinking style is scrutinised by others which means people can and often do assume things about you just by looking at the way you drink. However, Jae Won ignores his comment and if you pay attention, you can see that Jae Won seldom drinks beer/soju/[insert name of whatever drink is poured] down in one. It’s silly but it makes me happy that Jae Won still allows himself to drink the way he wants to.

It's also worth noting how Ae Ri is socially aware of what it means to drink when in college. She knows what is expected of her and the way she skilfully opens the soju bottle reinforces this idea. Everyone is impressed by her skills, even Ji Hyun who is clearly uncomfortable sitting in that bench with everyone but still accepts the drink he was poured.  

Then comes the campfire scene and the drinking game because drinking games are, then again, a must-have when you’re around a campfire, aren’t they? Personally, I hate drinking games because they’re awfully pressuring. They make me tense and I worry about what might happen. If the “Like You” game is thankfully rather “fun” and not that pressuring, Ae Ri and Bit Na start to worry once Tae Hyung is preparing the penalty drink (episode 3). I’ll talk about it in the Episode 3 part.

Yoon Won is aware of how alcohol can make things escalate quickly and that’s why she tells Jae Won, during the barbecue, that they should protect the freshmen if things start getting out of hand. Although alcohol is not inherently something bad, it demands restraint and that’s something many people lack hence why the presence of alcohol might make some people tense and worried.    

Episode 3

I’ll talk about Jae Won and Ji Hyun’s first kiss along with their almost kiss in episode 4.

I said that I would mention Tae Hyung’s inferiority complex again and so here I am. His complex shows when he accuses Yoon Won of looking down on him when she tells him how forcing the freshmen to drink the penalty drink is “outdated”. He says so while being drunk. Tae Hyung is such a confusing character tbh. His friendship with Jae Won is even more so.

I feel like Tae Hyung embodies everything Jae Won hates the most and yet they’ve been “friends” since freshman year. Tae Hyung never minces his words and he is even more direct and harsh towards Jae Won when he is drunk. However, they always end up hugging each other, kissing each other on the cheeks, and saying things like “You know I love you?” or “We’re bound together forever, okay?”. The thing is, despite Tae Hyung being jealous and envious of Jae Won, he somehow values his friendship with him. The fact that he doesn’t want to lose Jae Won is paradoxical because he does enjoy seeing Jae Won’s mask crack, hence him inviting Eun Ji over in episode 1 and pairing Jae Won with her in episode 4. However, the way he reacts – see the toilet scene in episode 4 – to Jae Won’s controlled anger and annoyance implies how he hadn’t foreseen Jae Won’s reaction. He is quite taken aback and it feels as though he has finally realised that the Jae Won he knows might not be the real Jae Won.

Okay, we’re back to the campfire scene now. Notice how we didn’t see Jae Won getting drunk. Most of his drinking happened off-screen and I think this is such a brilliant way to highlight the fact that most things about Jae Won go unnoticed.

Now, once again, alcohol is presented as a means to fit in or to look “cool”. When Ji Hyun drinks the penalty drink, everyone is shouting and getting overly excited when they realise that the “quiet kid” has a high alcohol tolerance, as if having a high tolerance gave you some kind of prestige.

In the same vein, alcohol seems to stretch the limits of what’s possible or reasonable. Alcohol comes often hand in hand with a sense of euphoria hence the fact that there’s always someone who wants to go for another round. Alcohol makes you feel relaxed and confident and these feelings don’t last long given the anxiety-inducing society we live in. Hence the fact that the members of the surfing club – as soon as they got back from their trip – all wanted to go for another drink. Everyone had a bad hangover but still they all went for another round (because that’s what college students should do?? See Yoon Won’s words addressed to Ae Ri “When we were freshmen, we drank until morning”.). Everyone knows how badly they’re going to regret it next morning but they’re so caught up in the moment that they don’t think about what tomorrow might bring. And so everyone just keeps on drinking. Even Jae Won asking Yoon Won “Should we get another drink?” made me smile because Yoon Won was obviously not in a state to go for another drink but Jae Won still asked. It’s no wonder alcohol is associated with excess and irresponsibility: once you start drinking, it seems as if no matter the number of drinks you have, it’s never enough. There’s always room for one more.

Although episode 3 kind of conveyed a pretty common alcohol imagery, it still manages to highlight how alcohol can also help release someone’s fears and doubts and allows for deep conversations – especially on the mysteries of the human experience – to take place.

When Jae Won and Yoon Won have a drink together, it has nothing to do with the drinking that happened around the campfire. Jae Won and Yoon Won have nothing to prove to each other. Drinking together, just the two of them, is them spending quality time with each other. Something that seems to not have happened since a long time.

It’s the first time we see Jae Won relaxing – besides when he is with Ji Hyun – and it’s so beautiful to see him being a bit giddy and genuine. He is feeling overwhelmed but he still allows himself to let go of his mask and talk a bit about how he feels. One of my favourite scenes is when he told Yoon Won that he was a bit nervous talking in English to the barista. I adore that scene!! Jae Won never voices out his worries and him telling how nervous he felt so simply was heart-warming.  

Listening to Jae Won talk about his first impression of Yoon Won and how he didn’t like her at first because she was everything he couldn’t be says a lot about his character. Yoon Won is strong-willed and speaks her mind whereas Jae Won is constantly masking and he feels like he cannot be himself around others. But the fact that these two have stuck together despite their differences makes their friendship even more precious.

Another thing I absolutely love about that scene is this dialogue:

JW: “By the way Yoon Won. It felt good to surf after all this time.” (The translation felt a bit off in this part so I changed it. It might not be 100% accurate.)

YW: “Of course it feels good.”

When you know that Jae Won initially came back to the surfing club so that Eun Ji doesn’t get blamed (for what exactly? This has yet to be determined.), this sentence is even more touching. Because Jae Won seldom does things for himself. The moment he went surfing alone gave him the space he needed to finally listen to his emotions. Perhaps he is only ever himself when he is lost at sea, surrounded by nothing but the deep water. When he is surfing, nothing matters except the next wave and what Jae Won needs is for the next wave to wash over his overwhelming feelings. The sea feels liberating to him and gives him a sense of freedom.

Episode 4

Jae Won suppresses his feelings whenever he is with other people. Back in episode 2, Jae Won tells Eun Ji that he is keeping his basic courtesy for her and so the least she could do is to have some consideration for him. Jae Won could have snapped at any time and blamed it on the alcohol but he minded his words and controlled his tone. It’s only when he notices Ji Hyun that he freezes and suddenly feels too tired to keep on talking to Eun Ji. From the moment he sat next to Ji Hyun, his mask was long gone. He looks weary and the truth escapes his lips.

I wouldn’t say that alcohol made Jae Won bold enough to kiss Ji Hyun. It might have helped but I believe that Jae Won was just overwhelmed by Ji Hyun’s presence. Ji Hyun’s directness and genuineness aren’t things Jae Won is used to. Ji Hyun cares enough to ask him if he is okay. Ji Hyun trusts him enough to tell him about his fears. Ji Hyun is everything Jae Won lost. He is everything he couldn’t be.  

Their first kiss felt incredibly intimate. Jae Won poured his heart out in the gentlest way. Ji Hyun’s confusion after their kiss is both due to the kiss itself but also because of what was silently said during the kiss. The way Jae Won looks at him afterwards… He is also taken aback by the intensity of his own feelings.   

Jae Won’s grace resides in the fact that his vulnerability is something he willingly gives to Ji Hyun. Alcohol is often said to help people lose their inhibitions and loosen their tongue but Jae Won stays in control no matter how much alcohol he drinks. Sure, he’ll start doing silly things with Tae Hyung but he’ll never drink to the extent of forgetting what happened the next day. What I want to say is that Jae Won doesn’t need alcohol to be vulnerable and the scene with Ji Hyun at the Han River Park proves my point.

Jae Won is on his way back from his therapy session. Ji Hyun is on his way to meet Ae Ri. Jae Won is not okay and Ji Hyun sees that as soon as their eyes meet. The moment Ji Hyun smiled back at Jae Won, his apprehension to meet Ae Ri disappeared and nothing else mattered except for the fact that Jae Won was standing right in front of him with no one around.

Many things happened during the Han River scene and I can’t talk about all of them in this post so let me just focus on the fact that Jae Won asked Ji Hyun to buy coffee and not beers. I might be overanalysing things but I found this to be highly relevant. Jae Won is already in a vulnerable state and he doesn’t want alcohol to muddle his thoughts. Jae Won is teaching him something new and it’s making him think that maybe, just maybe, his therapist was right. Maybe it’s not too late for him to chase after his dream. But he only allows himself to think that for a brief moment because as he was about to tell Ji Hyun his dream, he suddenly brushes it off as if it wasn’t worth mentioning. Ji Hyun is sad to see him become withdrawn but he knows he can’t force him to tell him anything. This scene echoes that one scene in episode 1 when Jae Won mentioned his brother and then let his voice trails off. Every time Jae Won is about to talk about himself, he cuts himself off as if his own feelings don’t matter. It’s so painful to see him like that.

I’m fast-forwarding a bit here to the moment Eun Ji leaves the restaurant after having relentlessly humiliated Ji Hyun at work and being disrespectful to the restaurant’s owner. Ji Hyun’s boss asks him if Ji Hyun wants to have a drink with her but he declines. His refusal to drink at that moment is in keeping with the fact that Ji Hyun associates alcohol with quality time. However, after what Eun Ji put him through, he isn’t exactly in the mood to talk and when you drink with someone, you rarely remain silent.

I know what you’re going to say. Ji Hyun then offers Jae Won to stay a bit to drink some beers on the rooftop. But Ji Hyun is not in the same mood now that he was when he left the restaurant he works in. He doesn’t want Jae Won to go just yet and so he needs an excuse to make him stay. By offering to drink some beers with him, Ji Hyun is in fact telling him that he wants to spend more time with him. He is telling him that he wants to talk to him a lot more, that he has things to ask him, and that he has things he wishes to know about him. But he can’t quite tell him all these things directly. He needs a little push and alcohol is said to make people a little braver.  

Ji Hyun needed courage to tell Jae Won about the Namsan tower. It felt a bit random for Ji Hyun to tell him that at that moment which makes me think that he had thought about telling him before. In life, everything is about timing and sometimes you want to tell something to someone but it’s never the right time. If, for some reason, the right time never comes, you have to be brave enough to say the things you wanted to say even when you’re aware that no external forces are there to make things easier. Ji Hyun couldn’t find the right moment to tell Jae Won about his wish to go to the Namsan tower with his special person and so he had to make do with the timing he was given. When Jae Won says “I wonder when you can go there.”, Ji Hyun’s eyes answer him. His answer is so loud and I found it beautiful that Jae Won leans in for a kiss at that moment because he knows what Ji Hyun is telling him.   

The mood of this scene is different from that of the Han River scene, hence the presence of alcohol. Instead of being vulnerable, I’d say they’re being honest with their feelings and it shows in their gazes. Ji Hyun feels a sense of yearning arise in his heart as he looks at Jae Won and so does Jae Won who watches him with a searching gaze.

Part 2

[zodiactalks]

RELIABLE Zodiac Signs Ranked

Reliable people are those you can truly trust. They deliver on their promises, are consistent, responsible, and highly committed.

When you call a reliable person, you can rest assured that they will answer the phone and try to be there for you, whether a friend, a colleague, or a family member.

These people become your support system and won't hesitate to back you up when you need them. Now, not everyone has a personality type to be dependent enough, placing their needs at the top of the list when given a choice.

Read on the zodiac signs ranking from the most reliable to the least:

#1. Cancer

The crabs are not only committed and very responsible individuals. They are also empathetic enough to cherish their relationships to the fullest and go to great lengths to make their loved ones happy. You can count on them if you need a shoulder to cry, a piece of sound advice, or someone who will celebrate your success. You can tell that these sensitive water signs really care, making them one of the most reliable signs of the whole zodiac.

#2. Virgo

Virgo strives for perfection in everything they do, which can sometimes be annoying to their friends and relatives who have to withstand their judgmental nature. However, Virgo will never let their loved ones down and will do everything they can to help someone who’s having a rough time. This sign is very service-oriented and loves to fulfill their role with flying colors, whether we are talking about work, friendship, or love partner. Virgo will give you great advice, bring you soup when you are sick, and will be the first to congratulate you when you achieve your goals.

#3. Taurus

Taurus is a committed and down-to-earth water sign with a dependent and trustworthy way of approaching life. They don’t shy away from hard work and are willing to help their loved ones with complex tasks such as moving or painting their houses. The bull also knows how to spoil their friends and relatives and will make sure to comfort you with a delicious meal and bottle of wine whenever you are feeling down. This sign loves stability and security, which is why they try to constantly attend to their relationships and work affairs so they can be there for the rest of their lives.

#4. Capricorn

Capricorn is a wise and committed earth sign willing to endure any kind of hardship as long as they meet their goals and do not fail their loved ones.

These individuals may appear severe and cold on the outside, but they actually have a very generous heart that will never disappoint their family and friends. They can even pull resources from places other people can't imagine just to avoid letting anyone down.

#5. Scorpio

Scorpio is a passionate and fearless water sign that takes its relationships very seriously and is capable of endangering its own well-being for the sake of helping one of its friends or family members.

These individuals are capable of walking through fire for you and will prove to be fiercely loyal and supportive. Now, never make the mistake of betraying their trust, as Scorpios never forget a mistake, and after being hurt, there is no turning back.

Scorpios are reliable as long as others repay them in kind. When these signs are heartbroken, it is tough for them to get out of their self-absorption to help others.

#6. Leo

Leo often seems self-centered or superficial, but they genuinely want to help others and are very dependable and committed when pursuing their passions.

When Leo aligns with their heart, they are the most generous, dependent, and enthusiastic people, always willing to offer a shoulder to cry on and help their loved ones when they are going through a hard time.

However, when Leo has to put their dreams on the back burner to take care of more pressing matters, they can become conceited and selfish, putting their needs first, and may ignore their caring responsibilities if they have a bad day.

#7. Aries

You can rely on Aries to be there when you need them, especially if you are looking for motivation to follow your goals or a gym partner to help you boost your physical performance.

However, they won't always give you the right advice or make you feel better when you're having a bad day. Rams don't usually think about what they say and are too impulsive in their interactions, making them very blunt and tactless.

When they feel that a loved one is not trying hard enough to get out of their situation, Aries will lose patience. They want to find a quick solution and not waste time complaining or self-pity.

#8. Libra

Libra keeps their promises and will try to be there for others when they need them. However, they do this to keep their reputation intact and not appear rude, even though they may not feel like doing what they are asked to do.

Still, if you need advice, you can always count on Libra, who is objective enough to understand your point of view and help you reach a harmonious and fair solution. These individuals will never do anything to upset others and will seek peace in all their interactions.

#9. Sagittarius

Sagittarius is not exactly reliable. These signs have a hard time keeping their promises and committing to projects because they go where the wind takes them and can change course at a moment's notice.

These individuals will never let go of their desires to surrender to other people's needs. Their spirits are too wild and spontaneous to be there for anyone's needs. For them, it is better to be authentic than to comply.

If you need Sagittarius and they happen to be available, they will gladly help you! Now, don't try to hold them to a commitment that will occur a week later, as you may get disappointed.

#10. Pisces

Pisces is an empathetic water sign that has the best of intentions. They want to be there for their loved ones, remain accountable to their work goals, and not disappoint others.

However, these individuals seem to live more in dreamland than in the real world, so they tend to miss appointments, neglect their commitments, and forget their plans, which annoys their friends and family.

That's why if they ever let others down, Pisces will quickly forgive them and give them a second chance to make up for it.

#11. Gemini

Having a relationship with Gemini is like dealing with six people in the same body, all with different personalities and interests.

Therefore, it is not easy to depend on Geminis when you need them to commit to a plan. They may seem entirely on board with the idea at the time, but within five minutes, they will be distracted by some other activity, change their mind, or forget all about it.

So, if you need Gemini's help with something, make sure it's a short, on-the-spot situation, so you don't lose their attention and ensure they deliver what you need.

#12. Aquarius

If you are down or going through an emotional crisis, don't count on Aquarius to be there to support you. These individuals cannot deal with the intense emotional mess of others and will indeed run away without warning when someone asks for their devoted attention.

Aquarius is detached and highly values their personal space. If they don't feel like fulfilling a commitment or assisting someone else, they will have no problem saying no and going about their business.

If you are concerned about an issue, you can count on Aquarius to listen to you without judgment, but don't expect them to be there as long as you need them to be.

[ashtraythief]

Supernatural is depressing as a rewatch. It has its fun moments, but that show hurts. It wasn’t depressing when I first watched it, but over time…. The rewatches are especially depressing. You just know they aren’t going to get their happy ever after since the life of a hunter is absolute hell. Well, I guess no happy ever after in their actual life, they do get to enjoy heaven together. So yeah, I get you there. What shows do you usually rewatch instead? Have you seen Parks & Recs? It seems like you would like it! Such a comfort show.

Yeah, the Supernatural rewatch can be hard. I have to say though, I’ve rewatched the show more since it ended, because I liked the end and knowing the show ended in a way that made me happy (well, it was obviously a fucking tragedy, but like, narratively speaking, it was a good ending because this entire show is a horror/tragedy), it made it way easier to enjoy the rewatches. The knowledge that in the end, they get an ending that honors the life they led and that they got a period of happiness on earth without apocalyptic disasters and then happiness in heaven. Occasionally, like every few years, I get the bug and start a rewatch from the start, and then at some point, which can vary, I start skipping eps 😅 Mostly though I have a few… thematic rewatches I do.

I either do a Fun Episode rewatch, including eps like Hell House, Monster Movie, Bad Day at Black Rock, The French Mistake (controversial, I know, I know), Mint Condition etc. Then there’s the Extreme Brothering rewatch, which is Sam and Dean being codependent little soulmates and just brothering all over the place, like Scarecrow, The Usual Suspects, Red Meat, Safe House, etc. Sometimes I also rewatch early season Winchesters vs Law Enforcement, which is fun and some really good episodes. So there’s room for rewatches, but except for the Fun Episodes, it’s not really comforting.

I do enjoy Parks and Recs, mostly. Tom is a lot, especially in the early seasons; I don’t do well with that particular brand of womanizing character, and I had to fight my way through season one, but then they really hit their stride. I love Leslie’s and Ron’s friendship, and generally a lot of th friendships and romances in the show are just really well done. I really disliked Andy in season one, but he got good with April. Ron and April is adorable and of course, Ben is just a gem in whatever combo.

I do rewatch Leverage a lot, Sophie is a queen, I loooove the OT3 and watching evil rich people get what they deserve is just very cathartic right now. Plus, I love a good heist and the new characters in the reboot are actually great. Maybe I should rewatch White Collar next...

Recently, I rewatched the Good Place and Schitt’s Creek, though I do have to fast forward through the more annoying scenes with Roland and Moira, sometimes they get a little much 😅

Sometimes, I rewatch old Crime shows, the early seasons of Bones and Castle, before they went too far off the rails lol. Like all procedural shows, they somehow think they need to go bigger every season, with bigger and badder villains, and it just gets ridiculous when an NYPD homicide detective needs to save New York from a bomb and Homeland only sends someone to liaison. Well, you know, more ridiculous than it is anyway. There’s a sweet spot, and small procedural shows saving cities/states/the world ain’t it.

I do also rewatch movies a lot, old romcoms, old action movies, Star Wars and Marvel when it was still good. Easy viewing. And now I just sound really old and crotchety…

I also like new stuff! And sometimes, when I have enough spoons or the right company, I even watch more serious and heavy stuff. It depends a little on whatever is available on streaming, I don't have all services all the time, so sometimes I'm limited in my choices.

(If someone’s interested, I guess I could make a rec list? For whatever?)

Nonnie, I’m not sure, but I think you might have sent me several asks, so if you want, just message me! No pressure, obviously, but the door’s open. Or, well, the inbox is. Seems we're kinda on the same wavelength, entertainment wise. Otherwise, feel free to keep sending me asks!

[awfulwafflez]

erm!!!! this 4 kevin..... yeas.. uhm!! this is abt my ocs... so erm! yeas? also first time actually trying to post so erm if this format sucks im so sorry!!! also i really suck at wording so sorry if some stuff sounds weird!! (╥﹏╥)

How Olivia, Rachel, Sophie and Xander would act with a crush!

note: i didn't exactly know what to refer to the crush as, so i jus said 'them' or 'the person'! also, sorry if there's any grammar mistakes, i didn't read over it... T_T

Olivia !!

The second she realizes she likes someone romantically, she'll accept it! She's not in denial since she's had many crushes before.

Depending on whether or not she feels the person likes her back, she'll either confess right away, or wait a bit.

If she feels that the person does not like her at all, she'll just keep it to herself. Ouch. :(

She's very clear when it comes to flirting! If she likes you, she has no shame!

She'll tell the most cringe pick up lines ever.. and think she did a good job..

"Are you a parking ticket? 'Cause you've got fine written all over you!"

Rachel !!

Yikes. Huge denial!!!

Eventually, she forces herself to accept the fact she has a crush.

She is not making the first move.. Not at all.

She mostly acts like her regular self, but sometimes her cold exterior fades a bit and she gets soft. :)

Yeah no, she's not confessing first. She fears that she'll ruin the friendship she has with the person. In order to not risk it, she keeps quiet, even if it hurts her. :(

Instead, she'll stick to calling them decent. It's her way of saying she likes them.

"I suppose you're.. better than average.."

Sophie !!

She is super confused at first!! What is this strange feeling??!!!

In order to understand, she either talks to Xander or Olivia, in which both of them tell her she has a crush.

Once they explain it to him, it all clicks for her! No wonder why he gets all happy whenever the person is around!!

She doesn't exactly flirt! Instead, she just becomes at lot more affectionate. If the person doesn't like hugs/physical touch, then he'll compliment them more!

She's definitely a bit scared, but with enough support from her friends, it's very likely he'll confess first!

"Hi hi!! You look super cute today! Kind of like a puppy! I like puppies! They remind me of you! In a good way!"

Xander !!

He's definitely the calmest out of everyone when it comes to having a crush. He's kind of just like, oh. I like someone. Okay.

That's not to say he's not scared about rejection, he's just a bit better at handling it.

He decides to get to know the person better! It's very likely that they're already friends, but he'd like to grow closer to them!

He doesn't outright flirt, instead, he gives them stuff that reminds him of them! Or makes stuff for them!

For example, he'd probably just be browsing Spotify and come across a song that reminds him of them.. and now he's spending hours making a playlist of songs that remind him of them.

"Hey.. I got you these earrings. I came across them and thought of you. Hope you like 'em."

i hope this was ok!!! lmao i have no idea how to write

anyways, mini xander doodle!!!! kev is indeed a boykisser....

[ina-nis]

The push and pull of loneliness in your mind can really lead you to make decisions based on impulse, out of desperation but, when you stop to think about it more clearly... it really is a matter of choice between devastating options, with the "least" harmful being loneliness itself.

You look at the people you have been infatuated with in the past - and even now - and you're almost thankful nothing ever came out of these friendships or brief connections, mostly from their end but if it depended on you? Impulsivity would get you to take action, most probably. The relationship would not last (if it were to become one) and you would be the one to walk away, even though you're the one pursuing a relationship so urgently.

The reasons you are not being "chosen" by these people become clearer and clearer as you get to know them. That's why you come off as "intimidating," that's why they might be almost afraid of you and your reactions, because you have a self-esteem, you're independent and you thrive on your own. You don't need other people, that is pretty transparent and pretty "off-putting," too.

You chose them because you choose... anyone really.

And everyone get caught up in your filter right at the start: communication. That weeds about... everyone. To you, it's something as "simple" as being able to be vulnerable and open about one's struggles, to be able to trust and speak your heart without fearing consequences, to be able to be unapologetically yourself and not have that held against you. It's about the back and forth too, about the reciprocity, about showing up and wanting to be there, among other things.

You want to go deep, most people do not, it seems. That's too bad, so you keep on going.

Yes, absolutely, you could choose to compromise on all these values and boundaries of yours, to negotiate your non-negotiables, in the name of obtaining and trying to maintain/nurture a connection with another person.

The problem with that is not only incompatibility but also... these are the kinds of relationships and people you will outgrow - whether that is a friendship or romance - and that gives space to resentment and unhappiness.

Do you really want to nurture that ever-growing unhappiness building up in your core because being lonely is just too unbearable? Probably not, huh?

It is, indeed, a lonely place to be. To put so much work into healing, so much work into being able to properly communicate, to try so hard to open yourself to another so that a connection can occur and realizing that... most people don't seem to be doing that, at all.

They're never going to be a good match for you, because they will become a hindrance to you, or the relationship will.

You will always outgrow these people because they're on their own journey with their own lives and issues and struggles, that are not compatible with yours and with yourself.

It is so incredibly frustrating to realize that, in order to - maybe - be able to connect with another person, you will have to quite literally step on their level: be it masking, or watering yourself down, or making yourself more palatable or friendly, because most people are not so busy living inside their heads like you do. They're not taking psychotherapy and mental health treatment as a "full-time" job like you do. They're not disabled in the way you are.

They just have relationships, break ups, and try again and again. It's not a big deal, it was never supposed to be a big deal, but it is for you and there's only so much you can do about it.

Your feelings are not a mistake after all.

Even if the realization that all the work and effort you've been putting into yourself have, probably, worked against you and pushed you into further isolation...

It also has showed you that there's more than mediocrity and the bare minimum, and that you're not wrong for wanting it or pursuing it.

You deserve the best you can get.

You've done enough of making yourself small and chasing someone's shadows.

You deserve to shine, even if you shine alone.

A connection to someone else should not be a hindrance to you and if that's all what's out there, then you might as well remain alone.