#the ending is really nice and emotional but god damn i hate romance

[hartmannyoukaigirl]

Kara no kyoukai movie adaptation was 10/10 but now having read some of the novel, they actually censored my girl shiki and it's aghakbfnb?!3!£

let her say fuck !!!! she's more vulgar and edgy in the novel meanwhile the movies toned her down a bit and let SHIKI be the fuck sayer but NOO!! the entire point is that she always has all the 'negative qualities' SHIKI had & it wasn't his fault, smh

[makeitmingi]

The Cat and Dog Game [Chapter 44]

*reposted because the chapter disappeared!*

Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy

Pairing: Yunho x Reader (y/n)

Characters: Chef!Reader, RestaurantOwner!Yunho, MaitreD!Hongjoong, Waiter!Yeosang, Waiter!San, Waiter!Mingi, SousChef!Seonghwa, SousChef!Wooyoung, PrepChef!Jongho

Summary: Yunho's dream was to open and run his own restaurant. But he doesn't know anything when it comes to cooking. Until you came along and accepted the job, bringing with you a small crew. How will the black cat tame the energetic golden retriever?

Word count: 3.2K

Chapter warning(s): (y/n) has a little breakdown, she's emotional and feels guilt (leading to her being stressed and overwhelmed)

"I guess it's been obvious to those that can read me. I wanted to clear my head a bit more before coming to talk to you about it. But it seems like I've been unsuccessful." You replied honestly, resting your head on your free hand.

"Just lay out all your thoughts here. I'll help you sort them through if you'd like." Yunho offered.

"I appreciate that, Yun. Really... It's just..."

"I'm one of the reasons why you can't make a decision, right?" He spoke softly. You looked up at him, meeting his eyes. There was patience and love, no anger or sarcasm.

"Yun, it's not your fault. It's me... I'm just overthinking everything." You sighed, taking a small bite of your porridge.

"Don't beat yourself up for overthinking or feeling guilt. It's normal." He comforted.

"No matter what your decision is, nothing is going to change between us, alright?" He held your chin, tilting your head up to make you look at him.

"I know." You nodded, a small smile appearing on your face, leaning in to press your forehead against his. Count on Yunho to make you feel like you were the most loved person in the world, that look he gave you, it's like you hold his world in your hands. Yunho smiled back, going forward to give you a peck.

"It'll be okay, it's not like one of us is going off to war." He chuckled and stroked your cheek.

"I know that... It'll just be... different, you know?" You shrugged, the both of you going back to your meals before it got too cold. Yunho silently laid his hand over yours.

"It feels like I'm abandoning ship. All of us started this together, from day 1. If I leave, I'm taking 3 others with me." You sighed.

"And that's okay. It doesn't mean we're ending anything, love. We're all still family." He reminded.

"I still need to think this over. It's not a decision I can make right now for everyone, not right this instant. I need to talk to the others first." You gulped.

"Of course, take all the time you need." Yunho pulled you in to kiss your temple.

After the food was done, you put your bowl in the dishwasher and got yourself a beer. You needed the alcohol to calm your nerves and take the edge off. Mingi and San dragged Yunho away to play video games so you stayed in your room with Seonghwa.

"What's wrong? I can hear you think." Seonghwa asked, his vision trained on his switch game.

"Yunho brought up the contract, he knows I've been thinking about it. And of course, he was so god damn nice about it. I hate it." You groaned into the blanket.

"You're hearing yourself right? You hate that he's giving you the freedom and opportunity to choose what you want to do."

"Feminism aside. I want him to tell me what he wants. He always caters to my needs and wants." You sighed.

"So this time, you want him to tell you to stay or to go? Do you think that will help you make a decision?" Seonghwa raised an eyebrow, putting his switch aside.

"Ugh, I don't know, Hwa. Stop asking me more questions!" You groaned, falling back onto the pillow.

"Jagi, what's wrong?" Wooyoung poked his head into the room. He noticed it was just you and Seonghwa so he invited himself in. Jongho trailed in behind him, closing the door. Wooyoung laid beside you, his arms around your waist to snuggle with you while Jongho sat at the foot of the bed.

"Are you still stressing about the contract?" Jongho asked. You nodded glumly.

"My poor jagi... Jongho told me what's been bothering you... About our contracts ending." Wooyoung cooed, combing your hair away from your face lovingly.

"What should I do, Woo?" You turned to him.

"Wait, you're asking me?" Wooyoung blinked in confusion as your sudden question.

"She just wants you to give an answer so she doesn't have to think about it." Seonghwa said, knowing you well. You rolled your eyes and pinched his thigh, making him flinch.

"Yunho told me that it's my decision, that things won't change between us." You sat up, running your fingers through your hair.

"He's right. Nothing will change between us and them, we're all friends, a big family. Doesn't mean we don't work together, that we aren't a family anymore or that we won't see each other ever again." Wooyoung said.

"That's what Seonghwa hyung and I said. Yunho hyung won't let the decision hurt his relationship. But (y/n)'s feeling the guilt of leaving Yunho and the others." Jongho explained further.

"Yunho's too nice. He won't ever tell me to stay. But... now that we're all here, what do all of you want?" You asked them.

"We'll follow you. We're sticking together." Wooyoung said, looking to Jongho and Seonghwa.

"Agreed." The two nodded.

"You're not making this decision any easier on me. You all have the talents to work in better kitchens, under bigger management and getting a higher pay." You clicked your tongue.

"Who needs all that when we know we work best together and achieve results?" Seonghwa pointed out.

"Be honest with me, are you guys still getting offers?" You asked. They all looked at each other before nodding their heads slowly. It wasn't really a secret between the 4 of you that each of you got occasional offers from restaurants to join their team or pop up kitchens to come for short stints of work.

"Anything tempting?" You probed further.

"Not really." Jongho replied, checking his phone. You grabbed your phone, looking through your emails to refresh your memory of who had sent you job offers too.

"I wish Yunho would tell me what he wants. Saves me making a decision." You said, mainly to Jongho and Wooyoung.

"Can you say for certain, you won't be disappointed with his decision?" Wooyoung tilted his head.

"It's not that... To me, this is a big decision and I feel like I should be considering him as a factor in that decision." You tried to explain your feelings to them.

"But it's because this is a big decision that he wouldn't want his wants to get in the way of what you want." Seonghwa said.

"He's always putting me first. And for once, I just want to do the same for him." You let out a shaky breath. Maybe there was just so much more to this than you want to admit. It's not just about the job, it's about your relationship with Yunho.

"Jagi, is that another reason why you're so stressed out about this?" Wooyoung melted, stroking your head. You nodded and fell forward to his chest for him to hug you.

"I know this is one of many decisions I'll have to make in life and in my relationship. But so far, everything has been on my terms because what, I'm too emotionally unstable. And I hate it." You choked.

"Oh, sweetheart." Seonghwa rubbed your back.

"There's nothing to feel bad about. You're a couple that just shows each other love in different ways. You do it through acts of service and all 'this' is how Yunho shows his." Jongho comforted.

"I know it's not easy but don't think about this decision as an ultimatum or that it'll reflect your relationship with Yunho." Seonghwa said.

"You don't have to rush to a decision. For now, just enjoy this vacation." Wooyoung kissed your head.

"He's right. None of us are expecting you to make this decision right now, even Yunho. Who knows, maybe the cards will fall into place on their own." Seonghwa smiled softly. You were glad that you had the 3 of them by your side. Even if you felt guilty, you never wanted to work separately from them.

"Where's (y/n)?" Hongjoong asked, coming back from the deck to see Yunho lounging on the couch, watching Mingi and Yeosang challenge each other at mario kart.

"She's upstairs with Seonghwa hyung, Wooyoung and Jongho." Yunho replied.

"They're probably discussing the contract thing." Yeosang said, not taking his eyes off the game

"Yeah..." Yunho replied curtly. He didn't want to say anything more to that. That decision was yours and the team's to make. That's why Yunho hadn't gone to find you yet, giving you privacy.

"At the same time, we should discussing all of your contracts too." Yunho sat up, diverting the subject.

"Our contracts are ending?" Mingi agreed.

"Well, it is in your contracts that you can leave at any time. So I just wanted to check with all of you. There's no obligation to stay, of course. I'm already very grateful that you've all helped me so much the past year." Yunho said to his friends.

"I'll be having to take a step back. I can still work but not as actively as I am now. I've got some invites for custom fashion pieces to be made." Hongjoong raised his hand.

"Wow, that sounds amazing, hyung. Congratulations." All the boys clapped for the oldest.

"Thank you." Hongjoong grinned.

"Are you sure it won't be too taxing on you to work at the restaurant and do your projects at the same time, hyung?" San asked.

"I'll be fine. And until these projects have actual results, I'll need to get money to pay for all my supplies and studio rental somehow." Hongjoong shrugged.

"I've got nothing much else to do anyway so I'm cool with staying on." Mingi raised his hand.

"Actually, San and I were offered part time jobs at the gym as trainers for gym goers. We don't really know much of the details yet but if we decide to join them, it means we'll be part time at the gym and part time at the restaurant." Yeosang informed and San hummed in confirmation.

"That can be arranged. Let me know how it goes then I'll decide if I need to set aside some money to hire some part time wait staff." Yunho said.

"Of course. Thanks, Yunho ah." San smiled.

After the games ended, San and Yeosang went for a run while Hongjoong went to take a nap, leaving Yunho and Mingi.

"Here." Mingi handed Yunho a beer. The two of them decided to sit on the deck chairs on the beach, wanting to get some fresh air. Plus, the sun wasn't too intense.

"Can you believe it's already been a year?" Yunho asked, taking a swig of his beer.

"Time really flies. Feels like just yesterday, we were sitting at the booth and you were worrying about not having a kitchen crew when opening was just a few days away." Mingi reminded, making Yunho roll his eyes.

"So much has happened in a year. Couldn't have done it without you, Mingi ah." Yunho smiled softly.

"Of course, we've been doing everything together since we've met. And we'll continue to do it for as long as we're friends." Mingi grinned. Yunho threw his head back in laughter.

"Deal." Yunho clinked his bottle against Mingi's.

"Are you worried that (y/n) might decide to not stay with the restaurant?" Mingi asked.

"I wouldn't say worry is what I'm feeling... I don't know... I don't want her to feel like she has to stay because of me. She shouldn't have to sacrifice amazing opportunities for me." Yunho sighed.

"I'm sure you told her that but at the same time, I know (y/n) a little. She doesn't like the feeling of making decisions for herself, it makes her feel guilty and selfish. That's why she's thinking about you, Seonghwa hyung, Wooyoung and Jongho too. I can imagine the stress she's under." Mingi said.

"Now that she's broken things off with her father, I want her to feel that freedom of finally doing things for herself." Yunho shrugged.

"But you're in a relationship. It's normal to feel the need to think for the other person, not just yourself. You're thinking of what's best for her and she's doing the same for you." Mingi pointed out.

"Wow, you sure know a lot about relationships." Yunho raised an eyebrow.

"Not me, it's my mom. I've always been 'T' and I don't read underlying emotions so she explains them to me." Mingi chuckled.

"And I may not have witnessed a lot of relationship but I know you and (y/n) have a good thing going. Working separately isn't going to change that." Mingi added.

"You think so? I feel that way too." Yunho agreed.

"You both are opposites. Not opposites that fight each other but opposites that compliment each other like a jigsaw puzzle, you know? Like you're hyper and excited while she's cool and collected. Both good in their own way." Mingi tried to explain.

"I know. We both make each other better. I like that there's one of me and one of her." Yunho smiled fondly at the thought of you.

"The perfect golden retriever and black cat couple." Mingi snapped his fingers.

"You and San say that all the time. And I still have no idea what that means but I'm assuming I'm the golden retriever and (y/n)'s the black cat?" Yunho tilted his head.

"Duh. You're obviously NOT the black cat." Mingi scoffed, finishing his beer. Yunho rolled his eyes.

"Whiskey does act a lot like (y/n). It's adorable." Yunho grinned, proudly showing Mingi his phone wallpaper, which was you sleeping with Whiskey curled up and tucked under your chin, also asleep.

"I'm not sure if (y/n) would appreciate you using a picture of her sleeping as your wallpaper." Mingi chuckled.

"Surprisingly, she didn't care." Yunho shrugged.

Grabbing their empty beer bottles, the twin tower pair turned to head back into the house. Yunho saw Seonghwa, Wooyoung and Jongho in the kitchen, fixing what looked like lunch. But you were not there. He didn't even need to ask, Seonghwa nodded towards the stairs and Yunho made his way to your room.

"Love?" Yunho knocked lightly and poked his head in. You were fast asleep, hugging Yuyu and Yunnie in each arm. Yunho went to your side of the bed, bending down so he could see your face.

"Oh, love..." He softened at the sight of your slightly puffed eyelids, a sign that you cried. Leaning over, he kissed your cheek and stroked your hair.

"Yun?" You had a small frown as you opened your eyes slightly.

"Sorry to disturb you, baby. Go back to sleep." Yunho whispered, patting your head.

"Stay with me?" You asked. Yunho nodded and climbed into bed, pulling you to his chest. You turned around so you faced him and let his whole body cocoon you.

"I love you." You breathed out as you fell back asleep, feeling much more comfortable and secure in Yunho's embrace.

"I love you too." He kissed your forehead and wound his arms tighter around you. Looking down at you, Yunho couldn't stop smiling. Everything you did, he found absolutely adorable. He closed his eyes and joined you in dreamland.

When Yunho stirred awake, his head was resting on your arm, facing your chest. You were using your phone, looking at it behind his head as you were careful not to disturb Yunho's rest.

"Love." He buried his face into your chest, squeezing your waist. He would never get over the feeling of waking up next to you.

"Good morning. Did you sleep well?" Your free hand playing with the ends of Yunho's hair.

"Yeah... I did... When did you wake up?" Yunho asked.

"Not too long ago. I didn't want to move though, just wanted to stay here with you. And somehow, some way, we swapped positions. Not that I minded." You chuckled.

"I don't mind this too." He giggled, using his strength to roll over so you were below him.

"Ah! Yunho! That's ticklish. Stoppppp~" You squirmed, the both of you laughing. He did relent, hovering over you with your arms wrapped around his neck. Yunho smiled softly, Mingi was right, you and him were strong and made for each other, nothing will change your relationship.

"For the rest of our time here, don't think about the contract or the job, alright? Just enjoy your time here and relax, hmm? We have all the time in the world." He whispered.

"I like that. Thank you." You pulled him down so you could kiss him. But was interrupted by the door opening.

"Hwa, what if we were naked?" You asked as Yunho's eyes widened, his cheeks and ears turning bright red at your words.

"Nothing I haven't seen. You two hungry? I kept some lunch for you." Seonghwa asked. You turned to Yunho, who was vigorously fanning his face, too busy to answer.

"You good?" You raised an eyebrow.

"D-Don't just s-say things like t-that!" He stuttered nervously. Seonghwa's eyebrows raised in amusement.

"I think you broke your boyfriend, sweetie." He said to you. You rolled your eyes and slid out of bed to go use the bathroom. When you were done, you and Yunho went downstairs to eat. Seonghwa handed you each a plate of food.

"Thanks, hyung/ Hwa." The two of you sat on the couch to eat, watching Wooyoung challenge Yeosang at some game. You held a spoon of food out to Seonghwa.

"I already ate." He shook his head, settling next to you.

"You're always hungry." You pointed out. Seonghwa sighed and directed the spoon back at you to eat it.

"Gosh, I'm so full. I'm not going to be able to eat dinner after this." You said as you ate the last spoonful of food from the plate. Yunho and Seonghwa both cast you a judgemental look.

"I know you two eat for 3 people but there's no need to be so judgey." You scoffed.

"Us? Judge you? Never." Yunho grinned and grabbed your empty plate with his to put in the dishwasher.

"Was thinking of doing pasta with steak night for dinner." Seonghwa said to you, putting his arm around your shoulder. You hummed and nodded tiredly, leaning your body against his. Wooyoung, who had passed the game controller to Jongho came over, squeezing next to you and laying on Seonghwa's lap.

"Ack! Woo! There's no space." You whined, being squished between his body and the back of the couch. He just grinned and snuggled closer to you.

"What about two sauces? One vodka sauce and one pesto sauce." Jongho suggested.

"Ooh, good idea. They both sound good with steak." Wooyoung replied, ignoring your attempted to push him off.

"You know, what? Yun! Please save me." You held your arms up. Yunho was there in an instant, reaching down to try and fish you out but Wooyoung held onto you.

"Woo, let me go!" You struggled.

"Never!" He declared. Yunho managed to slip his arms under you to lift you up bridal style and away from Wooyoung.

"Thanks for saving me." You chuckled as Yunho sat down at the couch where he and Mingi were, setting you down in his lap. Mingi laughed and waved to you, to which you waved back. Yunho kept his arms around you, kissing your temple.

"You know I'll save you any time." He murmured, nuzzling his head against your cheek. You laughed, hugging his neck and pulled him closer to you.

~

Series masterlist

[ravenna222]

An unexpected beginning

Lmao sorry about the half-assed title, this is my first fic and I'm pretty nervous about it

Not to mention I wrote this in 10 minutes out of impulsivity so don't expect any quality writing really

Warnings: none (extremely sappy ending and possibly out of character sae)

pure fluff ♡

| slow burn | romance | engagement |

"Sae!"

"What now?"

"I told you it's fine, I don't need a bigger one, the one you got me is just fine!"

Your boyfriend, now future fiancé, was being a pain in the ass. It's difficult to discern what's going through his mind, and god damn how helpful it would be to know sometimes. Itoshi Sae is a mystery to everyone, no one can fathom the emotions behind those bored eyes, apart from you. Let's say to you he's more of a puzzle, you've put a part of it together, the outer parts, but you're struggling tremendously on the inside. To think you were just a waitress at a coffee shop he'd always go to extremely early before practice so he could avoid any unwanted paparazzi encounter, always wearing a black cap and a pair of sunglasses. In the beginning he never quite stood out to you, I mean he was just a simple guy in a simple outfit, the same old sweatpants and sweater, there was nothing quite particular about him. Perhaps that was before you had gotten a clear glimpse of the sea of emeralds hidden under those shades.

You remember it clearly, it was as if a fever hit you. They were dull, yes there was certainly no denying that, but they were deep and alluring. You had been bewitched! Or maybe unknowingly it was the other way round. Sae is so used to being recognised wherever he treads, taunted by the paparazzi, tormented by fans, oh and don't get him started on the constant buzz of his phone. It was nice, almost refreshing, being treated like a normal person.

Whenever he passed by he always hoped it was you who served him, you treated him like another client, unlike your colleagues who would constantly fawn over him, hearing mumbles and squeals such as "omg the sae itoshi", "i can't believe he's right in front of me!"

Perhaps it was because you too were a foreigner, another thing which brought you both closer, you didn't watch football apart from the occasional international match but overall the sport isn't very popular in your country, hence you didn't know who he was. Overtime you figured it out, a football prodigy, "Japan's national treasure", though it didn't mean much to you, you were a simple waitress working a part time job whilst studying at a University in Madrid.

You two were foreigners still adapting to a new lifestyle, a new culture, a new language.

Initially there would be a mere exchange of words, moreso you trying to awkwardly start a conversation: "How was your coffee?", "Would you like to try our new freshly baked pastries?" But Sae hated small talk, yet he seemed to find the energy to not glare at you every time you spoke.

He's known for his lean and muscular body, slowly earning the title of sex symbol, his flawless facial alignments, those enchanting eyes, however he was also known for his "do not waste my time" attitude, but somehow it made him appear even sexier to the public, certainly not to the poor interviewers who had to suffer in silence.

One time he was rushing away from the paparazzi, you were just opening the café as he rushed in almost making you fall. 'How rude' you thought, 'not even an apology?'

But those thoughts quickly vanished into thin air when you were met with pleading eyes. He wanted to get away from all the reporters, the people, the world. He was almost panicking. He could usually deal with everyone by brushing them off with that nonchalant stare of his, but today was different. He had enough. Thankfully you were the only one there at the time so you decided to hide him in the backroom, where you brought him a glass of water to calm down. Five minutes later, with all the paparazzi gone, he came out of his hiding spot and with a half-assed 'thank you' he made his way out. Gosh you were furious, nonetheless a crimson red flushed your cheeks. A note with his number and a little thank you written below.

And that's how it all started, to think you would be already picking your engagement ring after 3 years of dealing with this man. He proposed to you during a midnight walk along the seaside, Sae has always found comfort in the sea and that's why there was no better place to propose, but there was one problem: the ring. Even though the ring he got you was one he knew you'd like, he thought it was unworthy of you because it was so small, he wanted everything to be perfect and he wanted to make sure you were happy with the ring. It was nothing too extravagant or big, it was simple but embellished just right

"Seriously Sae, love it. Stop being so stubborn! It's perfect for me, gosh. Why are you worrying so much about this?"

Sae groaned, he was definitely being too worrisome about this and he was well aware of it.

"Y/n, I don't want to make any mistakes-"

"Sae, sweety, I love you and I love this ring. Now can we go home and get some rest? The shop's about to close".

"Yeah sure, but don't go complaining or flip out on me if you suddenly don't like it".

You laugh to yourself, hopefully you're going to be stuck with this drama queen for the rest of your life.

[chaoticdelinqueerwithglitter]

Look at how my tears ricochet.

(or the unoverse fic)

(part 2)

(the MuSan is less subtle and more tragic because hell yeah, but it still could be seen as platonic since the plot is focus on the angst and not on the romance at all)

(also some background HanKisa if you squint it)

(link to ao3, in case someone prefers to read it there)

Introduction and Part 1 here. Read it before for this to make sense!

I want to dedicate this chapter to @souyaddiction because your post of this morning gave me the hype to finally sit down and end it because it was half-done for more than a month. So thanks, really. your words meant a lot! (and for the rest of you, don't hesitate to comment on the fics you like, it will make an author so damn happy 💜)

Also, a song for this chapter, courtesy of @just-sp-in-inginthevoid and their amazing Sanzu playlist!

Warnings: Angst and hurt/no comfort. Sanzu is having another mental breakdown (once for chapter, seems like a good ratio I guess?🤔). Mental health issues and a lot of self-hate because lil gremlin is not having a good time. I promise the ending will be bittersweet and have some hope on it (but not for Sanzu, sorry blorbo!)

MANGA SPOILERS! (Sanzu's mind it's a big manga spoiler)

Notes: Okay, I know I said it would change POV between Kisaki and Sanzu, but I don't know how to write Kisaki, his mind is a total mystery for me. So...this is Sanzu's POV again because thank god he's a stalker and I could fit all the plot just with his point of view. I don't feel too confident with the part of Kisaki's dialogue, but I did my best, I hope he doesn't sound OoC! (also, the thought on Kisaki and Hanma belong to Sanzu, not me, I love my HanKisa weirdos)

Next chapter will be the last one, yuhuuuu! Stay tunned 💜

'This are his intrusive thoughts' and 'This are his regular thoughts'! I was trying to show how broken his mind already is and this seemed like the best way in my head of showing it, I hope it makes sense :)

Also, I did that game with the names again because I love it. I used "Haruchiyo" when he feels more vulnerable, more emotional. And "Sanzu" when he's trying to hide this vulnerability or more close to the edge, to becoming that deranged Sanzu that we saw in Kanto Manji and Bonten.

(Same for "Mucho" and "Muto", since is Sanzu's pov the first one is used in more affectionate moments)

(English is not my first language, so be nice please 🙈)

To be honest, Sanzu is bored. He's plan was pretty simple: following Kisaki around until he discovers something he can use. It's also really easy to do it, at least for him. He's too used to being a shadow, to not being looked twice. Something that used to be painful but plays in his favor when he needs to spy on someone. 'Sure, keep lying to yourself, you love being nothing more than a mere shadow for everyone. Always so easy to ignore.'

After more than two weeks of doing this, the most interesting thing that happened was when Kisaki managed to make Hanma a new captain in Toman, pulling off an alliance that apparently impressed some of the other captains. Haruchiyo felt a punch in his gut at this, as if this decision was the same as spitting on Baji's memory. But he shut up, even if he couldn't understand why Mikey did this, at the end of the day, who was he to question the king's decisions?

If Mikey had asked Sanzu about this, he would've said it was a terrible idea. But he didn't, no one asked him, so he just kept his opinion for himself. 'No one ever asks you anything that actually matters, right? Because they don't trust you.' 'That's not true, Baji trusted me. That's why I'm doing this, I can't let him down.'

His own thoughts are starting to go out of control (again) and Sanzu is sure that the cause is this tedium. 'Do something, fucker! Plan a murder, plot some evil shit or whatever!' But no, Kisaki just keeps doing the same routine almost every freaking day (at least that allows him to still keep an eye on Mikey, since Kisaki actually goes to class, that bastard it's so boring). He tries to distract himself wondering why on Earth Hanma looks so amused around the boy with glasses, like he was in some kind of circus. 'What a freak, he genuinely likes spending time with that fucker'.

To be honest, Sanzu actually learned some important things spying on Kisaki. Like how he never locks his window at night, giving Hanma the freedom to sneak in and out of his room. The scarred boy felt like Christmas came earlier the day he discovered that, a maniacal grin under his mask.

He also learned that Kisaki was panicking after the stunt that Baji pulled on him. Haruchiyo loves knowing that Baji left such a big mark, a force of nature until the very end. But that's not all, Kisaki is scared. He doesn't want to deal with another one of Mikey's childhood friends wreaking havoc on his plans. So, apparently, Sanzu is next in line.

Not that Sanzu is complaining (at all). It makes his job easier, actually. No need to be worried about collateral damage if he's the target. The only thing he has to do, is discovering how Kisaki is going to try to put him out of the picture. Once he knows, he'll find a way to mess with that plan and kill the bastard. No middle points, he's not going to risk it (Baji is already dead, he can't risk it).

'Maybe his plan is killing me from boredom. And it's working.' He almost laughs out loud with this thought, but Hanma and Kisaki are close now, he has to keep it quite. Shrinking himself further into the shadows of the alley, Sanzu tries to sharpen his hearing.

“You've been talking for ages about how you're going to take down the 5th Division vice-captain, but you still didn't tell me exactly how. C'mon Kisaki, don't be mean, you know my curiosity is piqued!”

Hanma speaks so loud that it's quite easy to hear, always acting like he was on a theater. Unfortunately, the other boy is more cautious, so he's unable to grasp everything.

“...Toman's traitor. He'll be the key... he should arrive in a few minutes. Be a good pawn and stop whining.”

The taller boy grins at that, but Sanzu is not really paying attention to their weird dynamic anymore, his efforts are finally paying off. And it's better than he imagined, he's going to be able to uncover a traitor in Toman!

If it weren't for the fact that he's being sneaky, Sanzu would jump from excitement right now. Obviously, it would be much better if there wasn't a snake within the gang, but one of the many things he learned from his captain, is that there is always going to be scabs. That's why the task of the 5th Division is to purge them.

So yes, maybe Sanzu shouldn't be this happy about this. 'You definitely shouldn't, are you glad of having to kill someone else?' He ignores his stupid brain, because he knows that's not it. He isn't glad with the idea of having to do that. He doesn't want to become a murderer, he just wants to protect Mikey. And he's willing to pay the cost.

But that's not it. Not all, at least. He's about to find a traitor all on his own, without any type of help (well, with Baji's help to be fair). Haruchiyo is going to prove his value to his captain, he's going to show how useful he can be. He's sure that Mucho will look at him with a delighted smile on his face, that he'll compliment his skills and his hard work.

Yes, that's it. He'll protect Mikey, he'll honor Baji's last will and he'll make his captain proud of him. Mucho will see that he's more than a wild animal that needed to be tamed. His captain will see that he's worthy, he's certain of it. And Haruchiyo will finally be able to believe it, to feel like more than just a nuisance. 'Are you really worthy?' 'Yes, I am. I'm going to be after this.'

The minutes seem to be passing slower until, finally, the three boys catch the sound of someone approaching them. Sanzu makes sure again they can't see him, trying to be one with the darkness that surrounds him. Until the person arrives and he almost stumbles against the wall from the shock. What is his captain doing here? 'Maybe he knows? Maybe he discovered what this two were planning. Yeah, it has to be that!'

He feels a excitement through his body at the idea that they can take Kisaki down together. Like it should be. But something inside his brain is telling him to wait, to evaluate the situation before. 'You say it yourself, you can't risk it. Are you gonna bet Mikey's life on Muto?' Sanzu shakes his head and decides to listen. 'Just in case, right?'

The 5th division captain stamps Kisaki against the wall, fury flowing on his eyes, keeping Hanma away with the other hand.

“What makes you think you have any right to call me here, Kisaki?” The voice is calm but harsh at the same time.

The boy with glasses just laugh and puts his hands up, showing a false submission and calming his lap dog with a gesture.

“Calm down, Muto, I just wanted a few words with you. We have a friend in common, don't we?”

Sanzu ears perk up with this, unsure of what he should think of that. But his captain seems to understand, because he loosens his grip, allowing the bastard to be free.

“Izana.” Muto only grumbles one word, but it's enough for Kisaki to show a satisfied smile on his hideous face.

“I knew we could understand each other. Now that we clear out the issue of your loyalty, there something... Some one, in the middle of the way to crush Mikey like Izana wants, isn't it?”

Muto just clenches his fits, his knuckles getting almost white. But he doesn't deny the words, he doesn't deny that he is... A traitor? 'No, he can't be. No. No' 'Are you sure? He looks like one. Still happy about it?' 'Shut up, he can't be. He can't.'

“Would you kill for Izana, Muto?” Kisaki's voice feels like a poison, rotting away everything Haruchiyo used to know about his captain.

“What do you want exactly? I don't have time for your little games, go to the point.”

“Sanzu. Your vice-captain is too close to Mikey, knows to much. He could jeopardize Izana's plans to isolate Mikey. Sanzu must go, is that simple.”

A fist punches the wall, right next to Kisaki's face. The boy flinches for a second, but keep his composure.

“That simple? No. I know Sanzu, he's loyal to me, he isn't going to do shit without orders.”

The scarred boy wants to laugh at the irony, they both thought they knew each other so well, didn't they? And they were both wrong. So, so wrong.

“Oh, really? Do you think Sanzu would still follow you around once you betray Mikey?” His voice gives off a false sweetness. “After what you saw in that funeral?”

Muto just purses his lips at that, almost like it the first time he has to confront this fact. That he can't have everything.

“I see you understand now. Don't worry, I'm merciful, I'll let you a few days to think about it.”

This are the last words that Haruchiyo is able to comprehend, his mind, his whole world, seems to be spinning out of control. He tries to stabilize his own body leaning against the wall, feeling too dizzy, ends up slipping to the ground. He's shaking, not realizing how much time has passed, but the others are no longer in his sight anymore.

Taking off his mask, he throws up, feeling sick. 'This is too much, this can't be...Mucho... I trusted him.' 'Did you? You kept so many secrets from him, didn't you?' 'Because I promised to Shinichiro, that's different!'

Haruchiyo just wants to scream, to bang his head against the wall, to disappear swallowed by the shadows of the alley. He can't even go back home. 'What home? The one you share with that damn impostor?' But he should, he should pull himself together or he'll compromise his plan.

A pair of dark eyes come to his mind, a reminder of why he's doing all of this. 'Mikey. I can't fail him. He's the only one that matters, Muto can burn in hell.' 'Are you going to be the one sending him there? Can you really do that? After everything he gave you?'

Sanzu steadies his own breathe, trying to focus on his mission, on what he knows it's the right thing to do. He's finally able to start walking, the breeze of the night helping him to come back to reality. 'Yes, I can do it. The only thing he gave me was lies, it means nothing. It never meant anything, anyway.'

He can hear that annoying voice inside his brain laughing at him and oh, he hates it so much, he hates his own brain so fucking much. 'That's it, then? You'll just keep the lies going on, use him to get to Kisaki and kill them both?' 'Yes.' 'And how far will you go with your lies? Are you going to snuggle against him in bed tonight? To ask him for affection like a desperate puppy like you always do?'

He stops on his track at that, unsure of how to handle it, if he'll be able to pretend like this tonight. Maybe he doesn't need to, it wouldn't be the first time that he spends the night out, his captain never asked too much questions before. That's it, he can just sleep in one of his old hidings and think carefully about how to get rid of those two bastards. Face Muto tomorrow, prepare himself before.

'I'm going to use that fucking betrayer to get to Kisaki, they'll regret trying to stab Mikey's back. I'm going to make sure of that.' Sanzu smirks cruelly with this thought, savoring the idea. The punishment. He'll be the one imparting justice in the king's name. And he'll enjoy it, it doesn't matter who receives the penalty. They should've known better. His captain should've known better. 'You should've known better than trust him too.'

When the morning comes, Muto is not in their small apartment. He seems to just left, most of his things aren't there. A shoji board and and old leather jacket that Haruchiyo used to steal from him seem to be the only important possessions his captain left behind. 'Coward, he's a damn coward.'

Sanzu is burning in rage, a renewed feeling of betrayal growing inside of him, staining and corrupting his already broken mind. 'What are you going to do now? You were too weak to face him when you had the chance and he ran away. You failed. Again.' 'No, I didn't, I still know how to get to Kisaki. No more waiting.'

The place feels suffocating without Muto's calm presence, but it doesn't matter, he knows exactly what he needs to take from his own room.

In the middle of the night, a silent shadow climbs until he's manages to sneak through the unlocked window. Stepping inside, he waits until his eyes get used to the darkness of the room.

“Hanma?” A sleepy voice asks with a not-so-subtle insecurity lingering in it.

“Wrong answer, fucker.” Sanzu snickers, before slamming Kisaki's head with the hilt of his katana, knocking the boy unconscious.

[bananastarion]

I used to be a Certified Gale Hater since the moment I first met him in my game, literally everything he said rubbed me the wrong way. I just found him really pompous and cocky, while simultaneously being kind of desperate and pathetic and not in an endearing way, more like in the way I've seen in IRL men who I steer clear to avoid. He just gave me 'homeschooled Nice Guy with unwarranted self importance' vibes. And also 'forever alone r/iamverysmart redditor' vibes. Idk, he just gave me the ick but I kept him in my first playthrough just to see if he got any more tolerable... and I just ended up hating him even more (the whole wanting to be a God despite knowing what happened to Karsus thing gave me major, MAJOR ick). It got to the point where every time he had dialogue, I'd be yelling at the screen telling him to stfu. The final straw was the shitty comment he made as Astarion was burning alive at the end of the game. I wanted to punch him through the screen.

I realize Astarion is also a heap of red flags, but this is just how my brain works. Astarion can somehow do no wrong, and Gale is a douchebag. Idk, that's just my emotional gut reaction lmao. Honestly, it's probably because Gale is more like a Normal Real Man and Astarion is a beautiful fantasy, worlds apart from any actual man I've had the misfortune of knowing.

In my second playthough, I kicked Gale out of the party toward the end of act 1 and sent him off to go kill himself in the Underdark. I felt slightly bad and kinda missed him.

Fast forward to now, I am inexplicably crushing on Gale and want to start a new game where I romance him. Idk what happened, I just did a total 180 for no good reason. I think after having horny fantasies about Astarion 24/7 for months my brain is just in need of a brief intermission. All the sudden I'm noticing that Gale might actually not be a horrible person and in truth we have a ton in common? And also he's cute tho?? And he looks really warm and cuddly like if you crawled into bed with him you'd just never want to leave. I just want to invite him over and introduce him to my parents and my cats. I'm not particularly into bloodweave, but I might have to play as Astarion just so I can resist the temptation of romancing Astarion instead (all of my attempts to resist romancing Astarion so far have completely failed). Idk tho, I'd rather romance him as an OC tav but i just know that will end in me romancing Astarion instead. Damn it all, can't I have them both?

[jaggedwolf]

CR2 genderswaps, ranked

Obviously subjective opinions, file your complaints with someone else.

All genderswaps are to the gayest possible versions of themselves, because I am like this. (In other words, bi->bi, gay->gay, straight->gay). Pros is more of “interesting possibilities” section.

....this was supposed to be all of the Nein but I wrote this post in 2020 and apparently stopped after the top three so that’s all you’re getting! I think it was going to be Fjord and Yasha after the top three, and then Nott and Caduceus are like, the absolute least interesting to consider for this, why would you ever.

F!Caleb

Pros:

Look, for me, F!Caleb takes everything I like about the guy to the next level, while everything I dislike about him become things I’m here for her. Incredibly brilliant wizard with a dark past that she hates herself for? Nice.

Beau/F!Caleb as a ship is still one that murders me. They were colleagues oh my god they were colleagues

Cons:

Genuinely trying to find one...ah, here, I think of canon!Nott as very straight, so losing Nott->Caleb seems unfortunate. But we’re not in canon territory here, my dudes. Nott can still think this smelly hobo looks attractive in a jail cell, and she and Beau bickering about it becomes even funnier.

M!Beau

Pros:

There’s something to be said about M!Beau being the son Thoreau asked for, but still absolutely not the one he wanted - the boy has no care for propriety, he sleeps with the workers, he flippantly ignores the daughters of nearby important families, he gets so unbecomingly emotional in these family arguments tsk tsk

Which is to say, family angst-wise, I think canon Beau draws a little bit of comfort in that she was never given a fair shot because of the son nonsense. M!Beau? Nah, that’s all on him, or at least that’s a pretty easy perspective to have.

Rummaging through the candidates for M!Beau to flippantly hit on and realizing that it has to be Fjord is cracking me up. This half-orc cannot escape being flirted with. 

M!Beau/Molly probably happens in a hit-it-and-quit-it type fashion while in Hupperdook, between all the arguing and horny energy actually synergizing. And then Molly dies, and so Beau gets to be even more fucked up about it :D (And that tattoo...damn)

Absolutely nothing changes with the Nott dynamic, which is fun to realize! Except maybe now they both agree the minotaur is hot.

Cons:

Probably not BFFs w Jester and I can’t abide that :( Their friendship really did kick off with the roommate stuff. Aw, would Jester end up rooming alone whenever Yasha wasn’t around? Maybe that would get them to somehow still room together

?????? with Yasha - maybe closer to the canon Caleb dynamic. Though actually, hm, I wonder if M!Beau would be more confrontational with her since he has neither guilty feelings or horniness distracting him. (Less jokingly, I do think canon Beau reacts to women differently, even outside of attraction being a factor, in a way where she’s more....protective or considerate of them.)

M!Jester

Pros:

Has read all the gay smut that has ever existed, has recs, yes, still thinks that’s how romances work.

Overall, it’s kinda fun to imagine the slightly naive and very affectionate Team Heart of the Nein being a dude! Regardless of whether or not the Nein are still as protective of him, which is also an interesting question.

Both him painting wildflowers for Yasha and Caleb saying Jester is the one who changes people remain good moments

Marion still calls him Little Sapphire, duh

Cons:

Again, the Beau dynamic is all ???

but it makes one contemplate m!beau/m!jester, which I am not opposed to

I suspect M!Jester would not be very popular (funnily enough, the caleb and beau swaps above might also swap the populations who really like them)

[breadqueen95]

Dress - Bucky Barnes

bucky barnes x fem!reader

wc: 5k

plot: bucky and y/n’s relationship is new, and they don’t want to share with their friends just yet. but something as simple as a dress can change anyone’s mind, even the winter soldier. 

content warnings: kissing. physical affection. flirting. allusions to sex. drinking. being drunk. language. bucky being a flirt. 

a/n: this is for @natasha-romancff and her taylor swift writing challenge! it took me awhile, but i’ve had a ton of fun writing this. so many bucky fics are angsty, and rightly so the man has some TRAUMA. but for my first bucky fic, based on dress by taylor swift, i wanted something happier for him 

***

Damn. That was a lot of leg.

“I don’t know,” you muttered as you stared into the mirror, “aren’t these things…a little classier than this?”

“Uh…have you met Tony Stark?” Natasha grumbled as she continued to scroll through her phone. “The man has never been classy a day in his life.”

“Well I know he isn’t, but fancy people show up to these things. I just don’t want to embarrass myself.” You were currently standing in front of the full-length mirror in Wanda’s room, staring at the reflection of a woman who didn’t quite look like you.

But it was you, wasn’t it? It was just…that you was wearing a very short, very sexy red cocktail dress. The sweetheart neckline was a nice touch, but the back was completely open. And that hemline? Definitely hiked way up past your knees.

“Y/n, relax,” Wanda reassured in her lilting accent, “sure, the dress is a little…spicier…than you’re used to, but it’s in a good way.”

“I’m pretty sure every single person would be able to tell I spend my days in tactical gear. God, I’m not sure I even know how to walk in heels this high!”

Heaving a dramatic sigh, Natasha threw her phone down and looked at you in the mirror. Her eyebrows were raised, and she was giving you her usual ‘don’t give me that shit’ look. It nearly had you shaking in your very strappy black heels.

“Are you kidding me, y/n? I’ve seen you strut in enough fancy parties during undercover missions to know that you’ve got this.”

“Yeah,” Wanda scoffed as she took a sip of red wine from her glass, “all she’s nervous about is what Bucky will think.”

Rolling your eyes, you tried to hide how much that sentence affected you.

“C’mon, Wanda. You know Bucky and I are just friends.”

“Do friends undress each other with their eyes whenever they’re in the same room?”

Damn it. Damn Wanda and her stupid perceptiveness.

“You’re reading too much into it, Wanda.” She just laughed at you, acting like she knew so much better.

What you knew and wasn’t ready to admit to your two best friends, was that she was right on the money.

Bucky Barnes, the infamous Winter Soldier, your favorite person in the entire world, was now your boyfriend. He had been for a few weeks now. The two of you were insanely private people. Hell, it had been years before the two of you had finally learned everything about each other. Once you had gotten past the walls the other had so carefully crafted, well…

At that point you were in love.

But the others didn’t need to know that, not yet at least. The Avengers were a family, your family. They were really the only true family you’d ever had. But Bucky…Bucky was finally yours. And you were his. You didn’t think it was crazy to just want to enjoy that, just the two of you, without everyone else sharing their jokes and opinions just yet. They did it out of love, you both knew that, but you just wanted him all to yourself.

As you looked back at your reflection in the mirror, you took a minute to really consider what Bucky’s reaction might be. He had the best poker face in the room no matter who he was with, but you knew him well enough to know how he was feeling just based on his eyes. He’d always said how much he loved red on you, and he adored every and any excuse to touch your skin. Those steel blue eyes of his would absolutely burn once he saw you in this dress.

And fuck, that was something you really wanted to see.

“Well, if you aren’t going to wear that dress, you better pick something else,” Nat said, jerking you from your fantasies, “we need to be there in twenty minutes, and we all need to touch up our makeup.”

“Actually…I think I’ll wear it,” you said confidently, trying to hide your grin as you ran your hands down the silky fabric.

What you didn’t see was Natasha and Wanda sharing a secret smirk behind you, like they’d known what you’d do the whole time.

***

Six weeks ago, everything had changed for you and Bucky.

You’d known how you felt for a long time. Bucky Barnes, despite his past, was the kind of man anyone could fall in love with. He was sincere, kind, generous, witty…everything you’d ever wanted in a partner. He had been your best friend for even longer.

It had been a long time before you could even admit your feelings to yourself, let alone to him. After everything the two of you had been through, who had the time and mental capacity for romance? It just didn’t seem important. You just chalked up your feelings to being such close friends. All you wanted was to be near him, even if you just sat in silence doing different things. Just being in the same room as Bucky brought you a sort of peace you’d never had before. Whenever he touched you, even if it was just a brief hug or brushing your back to get past you, your skin erupted into goosebumps. But that was just because physical touch was still foreign to you, right?

And his smile. God, his wonderful smile…

Bucky didn’t smile much. He hid behind a mask of stoicism, a remnant from the trauma of his horrible history as the Winter Soldier. Showing any sort of emotion, especially happiness, was hard for him. But when he finally let himself smile? It was the most beautiful thing you’d ever see.        

It took several sleepless nights wrestling with those confusing feelings to figure it out. You didn’t just see Bucky as your best friend. You had it bad. Not just “oh my god he’s so handsome” bad, like the “I would take a bullet for you I’m so in love” bad. That revelation? It left you euphoric. It also left you scared.

Because you were so sure Bucky didn’t feel the same. And that thought was like a knife to the heart every time it flashed through your mind.

So you kept it to yourself. You tried to keep things as normal as possible, but your heart kept fluttering whenever he walked into a room. Being so close to Bucky meant you confided in each other about pretty much everything, and he knew you well enough to know you were hiding something.

It all exploded on a Tuesday night in the compound.

Tuesdays were your movie nights. Bucky had a lot of pop culture to catch up on, so on this night every week he would come by your room to watch a movie. It was a weekly tradition that kind of started by accident. You were shocked he still hadn’t made time to watch Lord of the Rings, so you forced him onto your couch with popcorn and The Fellowship of the Ring. He loved it so much, and immediately asked if you guys could watch The Two Towers the next week. How could you say no to him?

Tonight, you were watching 13 Going on 30. It was your all-time favorite romcom, and you figured you could both use a break from all the action and fantasy movies you’d been cycling through. Something with a happy ending was worth indulging in.

“Does that Matt guy look like Banner to you? Or is it just me?” Bucky asked through a mouthful of popcorn.

“Heh, maybe a little,” you said, “Give or take a few years.” He laughed at that, and you forced yourself to laugh quietly. You wanted to blurt out your feelings every time you looked at Bucky, so you’d gotten quieter and quieter every time you spent time with him. It was an awful reaction, and you knew he noticed. But it was better than losing his friendship, right?

After that awful and painfully obvious forced laugh, Bucky let out a huge sigh and paused the movie. He set the bowl of popcorn down on the coffee table in front of the couch, then turned to face you. Exasperation and hurt glimmered in his eyes.

“Y/n, what the fuck is going on with you?”

“W-what do you mean?”

“Oh come on, don’t give me that,” he said sharply, “I know you better than anyone, and I know for a fact there’s something you’re not telling me. Is it me? Did I do something wrong?”

“What? No, god no!” You exclaimed.

“Well it must be something I did, because you’ve never been this quiet around me and it keeps getting worse. I hate it, and I want to know what I did so I can fix it.”

“Bucky, I’m serious, it’s nothing you did—”

“Then why? Why are you shutting me out?” He cut you off angrily, arms thrown wide. “You’re my best friend, I just don’t get why—”

“I don’t want you like a best friend, Bucky!” Your eyes went wide as the words flew from your lips. In the most comical way, you clapped your hand over your mouth as if you could stop the words that had already been said. Bucky’s eyes narrowed in confusion.

Oh fuck. He didn’t get it. Curse him and his old man ways.

“What does that even mean, Y/n? Are you saying you don’t want me around anymore?”

“Bucky, of course not. God, I would never want that. Never in a million years.”

“Then you better explain, because if you haven’t noticed, I’m over 100 years old. I need a little help here.”

“It means, uh…um,” you stuttered, wringing your hands together. “Is there any chance we can just forget I said that?”

“Nope, not a chance.”

“It means…it means that I care about you. As more than a friend.”

His entire face seemed to crinkle as he processed that. If you weren’t freaking out, you’d be obsessing over how damn cute it made him look. Then his eyes got wide as he began to make the connection. Your stomach nearly fell out of your ass as his eyes lifted again to meet yours.

“I…I think I know what you’re saying,” he nearly whispered, “I just need you to get real specific real fast, because I’m not about to say anything until I know exactly what you mean.”

“It means I’m in love with you, okay?” You burst out. Even through your mortification, there was a sudden sense of relief. A secret as big as that had definitely been weighing you down. Now that it was out there, that was one less thing you had to worry about.

His eyes grew even wider. How that was possible, you didn’t even know. That beautiful mouth of his began to turn up into a small smile as he gazed softly at you.

“You’re in love with me?” He asked, his smile getting wider with each passing second.

“What, you need it carved into stone or something?” You couldn’t help but sass him. Did you fucking stutter?

“No, it’s just…I never thought you’d feel that way about me.”

“Well, clearly I do. So you – wait, you mean you’ve thought about this before?”

“Of course I have,” he said as he shrugged, “I’ve been in love with you for two years now, how could I not think about it?”

You were instantly filled with warmth and pure bliss. In all your obsessing over your own feelings, you’d never allowed yourself to consider that he might feel the same about you. It just didn’t seem possible.

“I’m sorry,” you burst out, holding a hand up, “you’re telling me you’ve been into me for two years and didn’t say anything?”

“Why didn’t you?” He shot back, inching closer to you.

“Because you’re my best friend. I didn’t want to lose you because of stupid feelings I have.”

“But…I have those same ‘stupid feelings’ for you. So can we just cut the whole act and get on with it?” Bucky brought a hand up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing along your skin so gently.

“Uh…um…get on with what?”

“Well I’d kinda like to kiss you, if you’re cool with it.”

“Bucky Barnes did you just use current slang to ask if you could kiss me?” You didn’t move an inch as his face moved right in front of yours, breath intermingling as you gazed into each other’s eyes. God, was this really happening?

“Yeah, guess your lessons worked,” he murmured.

“Well you better kiss me, then.”

As soon as your lips met, it was like coming home.

***

That memory, your favorite memory, replayed in your head as the three of you stepped into the elevator. Nat and Wanda were happily chatting about who would be there, what kind of antics Tony would cook up tonight, if there would be music we could actually dance to. You know, normal party things.

All you could think about was how long you had to stay until you could sneak off with your boyfriend.

You were so happy Wanda and Natasha had convinced you to wear this dress. When you’d first put it on, the difference from your normal look was so jarring that it took you a few minutes to get used to it. But now that you had, now that you felt the silky fabric shifting against your skin as you moved, now that you saw how dangerously long your legs looked in these heels…

Damn, you felt sexy.

And that sexy feeling? It made you want Bucky’s hands all over you.

But this was a party. A party thrown by Tony Stark, one of the most perceptive and observant people you’d ever met. If you left too soon, if he thought you weren’t “having enough fun”, he’d be more than a little upset. So you had to stay, drink, mingle, maybe dance a little…and then, maybe later, you could go do what you actually wanted.

The elevator pinged, indicating you had reached the topmost floor of the compound. This floor was home to a huge communal space, often used for just hanging out with the team. But on nights like tonight, Tony went all out and turned the space into something that resembled…a club?

The three of you stepped out into the massive room, upbeat music already blasting from the speakers. Typical Tony – he never really outgrew his love for dancing and parties. The bass thrummed through your body, making you want to move to the music. The lights were dim, but you could still tell who was around. It looked like you were some of the last members of the team to arrive. There was a huge bar off to the side, and Natasha headed that way right away. You turned to ask Wanda if she wanted to follow Nat, but she was already making a beeline for Vision. Smiling, you just turned right back around to follow Natasha. A drink sounded pretty good right now.

As you made your way to the bar, you felt more than a few pairs of eyes on you as you walked. You sneakily looked around as you went, noticing men and women watching you with admiration, and dare you say it, longing. As someone whose job was to blend in with the background all the time, this was a different and slightly addictive feeling. You leaned on the bar next to Nat right as the bartender slid her drink over to her.

“Straight whiskey tonight? Damn, going hard.” You quipped.

“Hey now, you know I can handle my liquor. It’s you we need to watch out for, you lightweight.”

Laughing, you scanned the party guests, looking for the one person you wanted to see. Tony had had arm around Pepper’s waist, both laughing at something Rhodey had said. Bruce lingered around them, drink in hand and looking a little nervous, but still happy to be included. Wanda and Vision were sitting quietly on one of the couches, both looking absolutely smitten with each other. Scott Lang, one of the newest additions, was busting some moves, while Peter Parker laughed as he watched. Thor, who was visiting from Asgard, laughed boisterously as he watched various guests try to lift his hammer. You couldn’t help the smile growing on your face. You loved these people so much.

Then, you saw him.

Bucky was with Sam and Steve, as usual. But even as Sam and Steve were talking animatedly next to him, those gorgeous blue eyes of his were glued to you. There was a kind of intensity in them you hadn’t seen before. Your breath whooshed from you body as he grinned at you. Trying to maintain the suggestive image your dress gave you, you managed to send a flirtatious smile his way, then turned back around to face the bar. Leaning against the counter, you knew he’d get an eyeful of your bare back. God, this was fun.

The bartender finally made his way over to you, and you ordered two tequila shots.

Nat turned to you, one eyebrow arched in surprise as she asked, “And you say I’m going hard? You can’t just down two shots right away, babe.”

“I’m not doing two shots; you think I’m stupid?” The bartender slid the shots over to you along with two lime wedges. “One is clearly for you.”

Unable to hold back a laugh, Natasha put her arm around your shoulders and pulled you into her side as she said, “Why the fuck not, let’s do it.” The two of you went through the process: salt, shot, lime. You couldn’t help but wince as you downed the harsh liquor. Of all the shots in the world, tequila probably tasted the worst. The only reason you kept going for it was the warmth it traced down your body, and you felt your muscles begin to loosen up.

“Two more,” you called over to the bartender.

“Uh, no,” Natasha shot at you, grabbing her whiskey, and pushing off the bar, “I’m good with my top shelf shit, you keep going after that gasoline if you want but I’m out.”

“C’mon, Nat,” you called out, “what am I gonna do with two shots?”

“I’m sure you’ll find someone else, babe.” She said with a wave over her shoulder.

Sighing, you turned back to the ridiculously pretty bar (seriously, how much had Tony paid for this thing?). Who else would help you look cool and sexy at a bar for your secret boyfriend?

Okay, that was the cringiest thought you’d ever had. Gross.

As the bartender slid the tequila in front of you, you steeled yourself for the nastiness that was about to happen.

“Fuck, I didn’t think this through,” you mumbled.

“Yeah, you tend to do that,” a deep voice answered on your right. Instead of being the slightest bit surprised, you couldn’t help but smile. You’d know that voice anywhere.

“Something I can do for you, Barnes?” You looked up at him from under your lashes.

“Well, it looks like you’ve got an extra shot there. Thought I could bail you out.”

“Is that all?”

Bucky shifted so that your arms were just barely touching. His hand was right next to yours, and you reached out with your pinky to lightly brush his.

“Doll, you have the gall to show up in that dress and ask what I want as if you don’t already know?”

“Sorry Buck, I’m a little slow, must be the tequila. You should probably be a little clearer.”

Putting on quite the show of reaching for one of the shots, his mouth somehow ended up right next to your ear.

“I want you.”

It was lucky everyone was so distracted and couldn’t see how you shuddered at his words. Trying to maintain brain function, you managed to take the shot with him. You were now fully facing each other. He was wearing the cockiest smirk you’d ever seen, one that would put Tony Stark to shame. You couldn’t help but respond with that same energy despite the jitteriness his three little words had reduced you to.

“Well why don’t you—”

“Hello, my friends!” A booming voice sounded between you as Thor threw a huge arm over each of you. Bucky, with his stupid super soldier strength, didn’t really have a reaction to it. You, on the other hand, stumbled a little under the weight and force of it. “It’s so good to be back with you tiny humans.”

Was…was he slurring his words?

“Thor…are you drunk right now?”

He simply laughed in response. Well, that answered that.

“Of course I am, tiny person! It can’t be a party without good Asgardian wine.”

“Wait…you have literal god wine?” Bucky, who had a look of vague irritation on his face up to this point, now looked interested. Maybe even a little excited?

“Of course, metal appendage.”

“Dude, you can’t just call Bucky ‘metal appendage’—”

“He can if he lets me have some,” Bucky interrupted.

“We have a bargain!” Thor slapped Bucky on the back before scurrying back over to where he had come from, probably to get the wine he had promised.

“Bucky, you can’t even get drunk,” you hissed, “what exactly is the point of this?”

“Since everything happened, I haven’t found any alcohol strong enough to get me drunk. I figure god wine is worth a shot.”

“Bucky—”

“When I kiss you against a wall later, I wanna be a little tipsy,” he whispered in your ear, “that cool with you?”

Unable to keep yourself from smiling again, you nodded as Thor sauntered back over. Ever since that moment a few weeks ago, right before he kissed you for the first time, asking “is that cool with you?” had become your thing.

And the idea of Bucky kissing you against a wall? Yeah, that sounded pretty good.

***

As it turns out, Asgardian wine is just as potent as Thor had promised.

For the first time in over seventy years, Bucky Barnes was certifiably drunk. It made him feel like the Bucky from all those years ago, and it was the most incredible thing. Here he was, over 100 years old, partying, and all his favorite people were here.

Including his ridiculously hot girlfriend.

Even as they both flitted around the party, Bucky and y/n still found each other’s eyes, even from across the room. They would send winks, smiles, even funny faces. All he wanted to do was be right next to her, talk and dance with her all night…

But they had agreed. They wanted to keep their relationship a secret for now, keep the attention off of them for a bit while they got to know each other in this new way.

But god damn, that dress.

Y/n in red was…indescribable. It didn’t matter what she wore, she was always the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. But in red? In this dress?

She was breathtaking.

“Buck, you breathing?”

A hand waved in front of his face, snapping Bucky’s attention back to the people around him from Y/n’s back. He had been imagining putting his hands all over that back later and had gotten more than a little mesmerized. He managed to get his eyes to refocus, finding a drunk Sam smirking right next to him and an even drunker Steve dancing next to him. But what Steve was doing couldn’t really be called ‘dancing’ per say…more like an aggressive wiggle.

“Why wouldn’t I be breathing?” Of all the things he could’ve said to get Sam’s attention off of him, that wasn’t it.

“Uh, probably because the girl you’re in love with decided to show up and show off tonight? Pretty sure you’re drooling, man.”

Despite himself, Bucky slapped a hand across his mouth, only reducing Sam to wheezing laughter. Knowing he had been caught, he rolled his eyes and grimaced a little. Of all the people to catch him, he wished it hadn’t been Sam.

“I wasn’t…staring… at y/n, I just never see her dressed up is all.”

“I never said anything about the girl being y/n.”

“…fuck.”

“LANGUAGE,” Steve yelled out, pointing a finger at his two friends before returning to his shimmying.

Turning back to him, Sam added, “Just go be with her, Buck. You’re not fooling anyone, and neither is she.”

“We’re that obvious?”

“A few weeks ago you’d at least try to hide it. Now I’m surprised you’re not jumping each other’s bones right here right now.”

“Point taken,” Bucky said, lightly slapping Sam’s shoulder before power walking over to his girl.

***

“Nat, if you don’t stop asking about Bucky and I’s relationship, I’m going to kick you,” you called over the music before taking another swig from your glass. It was no Asgardian wine, but the human stuff wasn’t half bad in your opinion. It wasn’t like you could drink the god shit, anyway. If you had even one sip, you’d be swinging from the ceiling like Miley fucking Cyrus. You were pretty drunk as it was.

“Okay, fine,” she said with a shrug as she took a sip of her whiskey, still as calm and collected as ever. “You’re almost as drunk as he is, you’ll be talking soon enough.”

“Oh? Is that your spy master plan?”

Natasha was still looking as unbothered as ever, but as she looked across the room over your shoulder, her face split into a savage grin.

“It was, but it looks like I might not need it.”

“What do you me—”

Your words were cut off as a large, warm hand enclosed around yours. Whirling around, you were suddenly face to face with the man himself. Bucky was clearly having a good time. His mouth was relaxed into the cutest smile you’d ever seen him wear, and he moved without his normal stiffness and intensity. He threaded your fingers together, smiling down at you with so much love it was a wonder Nat hadn’t said anything yet.

Looking back in front of you, ready to explain yourself, you only found empty air. Guess she’d seen all she needed to, but honestly, you really didn’t care. All you’d wanted the whole night was to be exactly where you were right now; hand in hand with the man you loved.

“We’re just kidding ourselves, doll,” Bucky called next to your ear, “Sam said we’ve been pretty obvious.”

“Nat said the same,” you answered with a sheepish smile, “kind of hard to keep my face under control when you’ve got that leather jacket on.”

“You’re blaming me?” He asked with mock indignation. “You’re the one who looks,” he gestured wildly to your whole body, “like that!”

Trying ignore the heat spreading over your cheeks, you shot back, “Like what?”

“Like the most…” he screwed his face up in the most adorable way as he searched for words, “like the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” As the last few words tumbled out of his mouth, he gazed at you with such a softness you almost melted right into the floor.

“Wanna get out of here?” You asked, finally giving up the game. It was pointless, really. Now, all you wanted to do was for your boyfriend to keep his promise and kiss you against a wall.

Wrapping an arm around your waist, he answered, “Absolutely.” Without looking at a single soul, the two of you began walking as quickly as you could for the exit. You and Bucky were both leaning on each other a bit, but you wouldn’t have it any other way.

Stepping out into the light of the hallway, you blinked as your eyes adjusted after the dark room you’d spent the last few hours in. Bucky led you until you were right in front of the elevator, and he lazily pressed the button to go up. There was tension in the air between you, like a thread that was being pulled. Biting your lip, you stared at the doors in front of you. You knew if you so much as looked at the man next to you, you’d jump him right then and there.

The shining doors slid open, and the pair of you walked in, his strong arm still around your waist. His grip wasn’t loose in any sense of the word. Bucky kept you right next to him, even as your legs wanted to drift all over the place. You pressed the button for the residential floor.

As soon as those doors slid shut, that thread of tension snapped.

Bucky whirled you to face him, then walked you backward until you were pressed against the wall of the elevator.

“I promised I’d kiss you against the wall, didn’t I?”

He didn’t even wait for a response. His mouth was on yours in an instant, lips moving together like a dance. The kiss was slow and unhurried. You tried to bring him closer, linking your hands behind his neck and pressing yourself to him. Instead of responding in kind, he unwound your arms from around him and pinned them above your head.

Oh damn.

Okay.

No complaints here.

“You’ve been teasin’ me all night just by wearing that dress, sweetheart,” he murmured in between the kisses he trailed down your jaw, “I think it’s my turn.”

“Would it change your mind knowing I only wore this dress so you could take it off?”

The heat that bloomed in those blue eyes of his was unmistakable. As the doors opened on your floor, he swept you up into his arms and began to walk purposefully to his apartment. All the while, he kept that signature cocky smirk of his you’d come to adore.

“Bucky?” You asked once he’d walked into his unit.

“That sentence was the single most attractive thing you’ve ever said,” he murmured as he set you down. Even still, he kept you pressed against him. “But nah, I’m a patient guy. I think I’ll take my time.” He followed this by resuming his slow and sensual kisses, and you couldn’t help but melt into them.

“I love you,” you whispered against his lips.

“I’ll never get tired of hearing that, doll. I love you too.”

***

[palaceofpassion]

Alrighty!  Time to get some hate!  Also, keep in mind these are my opinions.  You’re free to like, and feel however you want about whatever you want.  

Buuuut, time for some Temple Manga/Manhwa opinions.

Bleach and Naruto are both good at the start, however, they both suffer as the series goes on.  Kubo made it rather apparent that he didn’t even want to continue, this is a series that benefited from the color and action design from the anime as the manga itself is droll.  Everything is just a black ink blot, and he doesn’t do backgrounds.  Also he has the problem of same face.  It’s not good.  

Naruto I feel is better, but it’s still not a good series.  I will give Kishi that he’s a good artist though!  His backgrounds were very nice.  I was able to stomach through the end of both of these.  Alright story wise, but kind of meh feel wise.

In comparison O-parts Hunter or 666 Satan, did the Naruto thing but better.  It was done by his brother.  It didn’t feel drawn on, but the battles were fun and the story actually pretty sad.  You can most def see the inspiration from Naruto though.

Dragon Ball, oh god, the anime drags on way too much.  But the manga is a great read.  I think it’s a fun series, but it’s not great story wise.  

Hunter X Hunter is held back by the mangaka hard.  I know that he’s sickly, but there’s also the parts where he just doesn’t want to work most of the time.  Which ya know, fair.  It’s possible he doesn’t know what he wants to do with the series anymore, as it’s basically Hiatus x Hiatus.  Unfortunately, the Chimera Arc isn’t great, it takes a way a lto of the creativity that Nen had earlier and just goes into full on battle Arc.  It doesn’t help that the manga art turns into literal sketches at this point.

One Piece, I fucking LOVE One Piece, but it’s long.  And you have to be ready.  It can be a bit of a slow start up, however, Buggy had already drawn my interest from the start.  I do think people over hype how much oda has planned.  I do think he’s winging it a few times.  But it’s got a great feel to it, it’s probably one of the msot fun Manga, which I think is what it’s going for.  Battles, especially early in the time skip, are hard to read.  But what happens in them is amazing.  Also, I’d rather not talk about the anime, I’ll look up clips when I want to see things animated.  It’s just... episodes are drawn out way to damn long!  At least the filler is fun compared to Naruto’s.  Also Backgrounds 10/10 Oda.  This is on my to re=read list.

MHA, I enjoy it, but it hasn’t been enough to keep my attention.  I think it’s a good story, yet somehow, I was able to finish Bleach and Naruto, yet I don’t have the attention span for this series for whatever reason.  I’ll sometimes come back to it, so again, yeah not sure what’s the deal with that.  

Berserk is really good, I’m sad about the hiatus and what happened to Miura.  But his friend, the man who did Holy Land, I recommend Holy Land by the way, will be continuing it.  Though, their art styles are incredibly different so I imagine this is going to go vastly different.  One of the things I really enjoy, at least for what it was becoming, is something I enjoy about the more Recent god of War.  Someone who was ravaged by nothing but revenge, finally finding peace in themselves.

Komi Can’t Communicate, It’s cute as fuck.  But it peaked at the second year class.  Year 1 was super annoying, I hate Yamai.  That’s all.

Volcanic Age, this is a Murim styled martial arts Manhwa, so be warned.  It’s better than most!  Like, a lot better, the main character is reasonable, he doesn’t try to be the big bad man and tries to make everyone his enemy.  His knowledge actually feels well earned, compared to most of this type where they’re just gary stus.  Over all a good fun read.

Kingdom:  Fuuuuck, this manga is an emotional ride.  I don’t want to spoil it, but it’s historical fiction.  I enjoy this type of series, ancient warfare, as i was a huge fan of Romance of the Three Kingdoms growing up.  I still have the novels!  I suggest giving it a read, it’s really good.

Mashle, this is the over powered MC kind, but unlike One Punch Man, it doesn’t just remove the main character until plot demands it.  It’s about him, because it’s more than just a gag that became popular and now doesn’t know what to do with itself.  It give sthe main character to learn more about things, be more than just himself.  And he’s just a damned good person, if not a bit...k well weird.

Helck and Verndio, these are togther because one is a sequel to the other, and the effects of helck are slowly leaking it.  It’s pretty godlike.  Probably one of my favorites of all time.  Really wonderfully done, and it doesn’t last for very long.  Helck is a, OP main character, but it’s a riveting story!  You get to learn more about their world, and actually how terrifying it is.  In the end, being a single lone powerful figure just isn’t enough.  I really recommend these two.

Solo Leveling, it’s cool.  Like, it has that power fantasy down pat way more than The Gamer.  I’ll give it that for sure.  If you’ve read fics you’ve read The Gamer ones, the Gamer itself isn’t great... by any means.  Solo Leveling is definitely better, but at the same time it falls into the same problem of not being great story wise.  If you’re just in it for fantastic fucking art, and great fights though, this is really good.

On the note of Gamer style though.  Infinite Leveling: Murim.  Another Murim styled, but with stats and leveling for the main character.  This is done well, like fantastically well.  The leveling system is harsh he doesn’t just gain stats after stats, and they’re kept within the people of the world he’s with.  Those around him are truely superior, and the stats feel more like a natural progression of hard work he’s doing to train.  Unlike msot of the Gamer styled manga/manhwa, this one feels like he has to truly work for it, from excercising to training.

Worn and Torn Newbie, this is a game Manhwa, but the main character is fun and such a damn bastard.  You just can’t help but love him.  This series has really good art, and it’s a fun read if you want to just see how things go.  I suggest this one as well.

Return of the lEgendary Spear Knight, Another Manhwa, this is a breath of fresh air!  This one is one of those rare instances where people straight up change when they’re shown the error of their ways.  The world is shown to not be black and white, and characters who appear to be bastards can actually become better people due to the difference of environment.

The Lazy Prince Becomes a Genius.  The title is misleading, but this Manhwa is really damn good.  Probably my favorite Manhwa at the time of this post!  There are some pacing issues, but over all it’s great, and i feel like I’m losing point.

Anyways!

Mairimashita! Iruma-Kun, this will be the last one!  This is just a better RWBy style story.  If you like RWBY you’ll probably like this one way more.  The author fleshes out the characters at a much better pace, they’re all able to do things even if they aren’t combatants, and unlike RWBY, they feel like genuine friends who have good teamwork.  Story is pretty basic, but it’s elevated by the fun cast of characters who are all incredibly charming.  The main character is also just fun, he gets better and better as the series goes on.  The Rival character, so to speak, makes Bakugo eat dust for sure.

Feel free to tell me off if you want.  Just some thoughts i had when watching a Trash Tastes episode.

[capesandshapes]

All You Had to Do Was Stay (Post Reveal/Pre Relationship) (4/4)

Summary:

Three years ago, Marinette revealed her identity to him. Three years ago, he promised to wait in a hotel room for her. Three years ago, she opened the door to find it empty.

Now she's expected to play nice with him, since she's the maid of honor and he's unfortunately the best man. But old habits die hard, and old feelings die harder.

"This is a wedding, not a death march, Marinette."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

She took a step towards him.

And then another.

All the words that she knew had failed her, and all of the emotion in her body had left her. What could she say? What would even make sense? There was no fixing the situation, not really, you couldn’t take away three years of waiting and wanting. You couldn’t take away three years of replaying every word in your head and wondering if you said the wrong thing.

“But you’re not him,” that was all she could say, and it hit the air like a deadweight. Because Adrien wasn’t Gabriel Agreste, because he never would be. The love Gabriel had was greedy and selfish, it took and took until it tore away all that he knew, until it ruined Paris and everything inside it. But Adrien? “It wouldn’t have mattered that he’s your dad, because you’re Adrien Agreste, not him, because I would have stood by you no matter what. I wouldn’t have cared what they thought or what they said. I wouldn’t have listened to them or let them stop me. If people wanted to close doors in my face because of who I loved, I’d make new ones. If people didn’t trust me, or see me for who I was, I wouldn’t care because I would know the truth.” Another step, another mountain climbed on her way back to him. “If they hated you because of who your father was, I wouldn’t want to be around them anyway, I wouldn’t want what they had to give me. I know that you’re good. You’re so good that everyone can see it—that they would have to admit it eventually.”

She held his gaze, her hands holding onto her shoulders like that could save her from sinking—like she wasn’t so far gone under the tide of Adrien that everything she had tried to hold back for three years wasn’t already killing her. She couldn’t stop drowning; she couldn’t stop wanting him.

“Adrien, I’ve been in love with you since I was fourteen years old,” she whispered, “all of you.”

He exhaled, the low, throaty sound hitting the air.

“When you left, I…” She stopped, because he didn’t need to know, because she didn’t need to see him hurt like she had. “You broke me, and no one else has been able to put me back together since.” That was enough, that had to be enough for then.

“I’m sorry,” he muttered, the words almost lost to the crashing of the waves outside.

She shook her head. Maybe she needed the apology, maybe someday she’d want it, but then, at that very moment? She was the only person who could give herself what she needed, the only person who could pull her head above water.

She tugged her hands from her shoulders, and walked closer, far too close to him. It was the lack of distance she would have dreamed of when she was in school, the kind that led to moments she cherished such as placing her head on his shoulder or reaching across his lap to hold his hand. It was the proper distance to look him in the eyes, the proper distance to say what she should have said before.

“Adrien, I would wait three more years for you, fifty if I had too—because I’m so stupidly in love with you, I’ve been so stupidly in love with you.” She inhaled, looking up at him, taking in those beautiful green eyes, “all I want to know is, are you still in love with me too?”

And maybe she would have gotten the answer she wanted. Maybe she would have finally kissed him. Maybe that would have been the start of their happily ever after—

Had Lila Rossi not stumbled into the cabin with Kim’s hand on her ass and her fingers laced in his hair.

“God, you are so fucking lucky I’m horny right now,” Kim muttered.

And just like that, all the romance left the air.

And though she wanted to ask, to drag him out on the deck and demand it, she saw that look in Adrien’s eyes and she knew.

He was terrified.

And really, who wouldn’t be? Who wouldn’t be scared? Who wouldn’t worry about what the future held?

So, she laughed. An empty, loud sound, one enough to break any tension. And, not knowing what else to do, she ran. Because maybe not knowing was better than the truth.

--------------------------------------------

"This is a wedding, not a death march, Marinette,” Alya said, frowning at the reflection of Marinette in her mirror.

Honestly, if it wasn’t Alya, Marinette might have gotten by. Anyone else would have believed her fake smile as she looked in the mirror, applying her makeup.

But Alya? Being her best friend, she was in the business of reading Marinette’s emotions. Marinette couldn’t get anything by her, she was surprised that she somehow managed to hide being Ladybug from her for so long.

“It’s your wedding, Alya, am I not allowed to be sad that I’m losing my best friend?”

“To your other best friend?” Alya asked. She could have at least hidden her skepticism.

“It’s your wedding,” Marinette repeated softly. As in, it’s your wedding, not my problem parade. It’s your day, not mine. Don’t worry about me.

“He’s just over in the next room,” Alya said, reading her mind.

“It’s been a month,” Marinette repeated, shutting down the plan before Alya could even begin to form it. “If he wanted to respond, he would have done it by now.”

“I’m just saying.” She was not just saying. She was suggesting in that Alya way that wasn’t really a suggestion, but rather a demand. “I’m sure if you vanished for just one minute, I could get Nino to pull him out in the hallway and you could get your answer.”

“Alya.”

“I’m just saying.”

“Focus on your wedding,” Marinette commanded.

Alya scoffed. “Right. And how am I supposed to enjoy said wedding knowing that my best friend is miserable waiting for a response that, if she doesn’t go and demand it, might not ever come?”

“You could look at your groom and be happy about spending the rest of your life with him?”

“Oh please, I would choose you over Nino anytime.”

She didn’t doubt that.

“Listen,” Marinette began, putting down her make up brush. “I’m going to be fine; I promise. I’m just going to get some air.”

“Sure,” Alya said with a roll of her eyes as Marinette got out of her chair and moved to the balcony door. “I’ll see you when you’re done having your fifth mental break down and finally want to talk, Marinette.”

Damn, she was good. Marinette sighed, turning the deadbolt before looking back at her friend’s knowing expression, the other bridesmaids busying themselves in the background. “Thank you,” she said, because she wasn’t about to deny it, not to Alya. And maybe, once she got it out of her system, she would talk to her. Maybe once it was all over, she would tell Alya everything.

But at that moment, all she needed was air. And so she went, pulling open the balcony door of the hotel room and letting the night air cool her skin. She let go of the handle, letting it click shut behind her as she walked further onto the balcony, the streetlights of Paris gleaming far in the distance.

It was times like this that she missed being a superhero. She wondered what Paris would look like then, sprawled out in front of her years later. Brighter, probably, the city had changed since Ladybug left.

“It’s pretty, isn’t it?” A voice said, and she was sure that it had said it to her a thousand times before. The words were so familiar in that voice, said in the same inflection at the same volume that she had heard growing up. “It’s ours,” she was sure he’d only said that once or twice before—on the nights when it felt like there was no one else and the city belonged to them alone.

“It’s Paris,” she corrected, just as she had before. Because there was no owning it. It was this living, untamable thing, a treasure for her to protect.

For them to protect, because there he was, standing out on his own balcony, looking at the city like it was far more beautiful than the stars.

Not Adrien, not at that moment. Just as she wasn’t Marinette, not when thinking of Paris. Chat Noir and Ladybug, the heroes of the city, both standing out in their civilian forms, looking over it once more.

There was so much distance between them, and yet it felt like he was right there. At any moment he would leap, clad in his black leather cat suit, and stand right beside her. That was how the story should have ended; if it couldn’t end with a kiss, then it should have ended with Chat Noir and Ladybug, together again.

But Tikki and Plagg were far away in a box in Nepal.

“I came out to get some air,” he said, not turning to look at her.

“Me too.”

“Do you remember when we used to sit on your roof and watch all the cars go by?” He asked, and she could only smile. How could she forget?

Things were so easy when the masks were on.

“We have half an hour,” Marinette informed him. “Then the wedding starts and we start walking. We should go inside.”

“We should,” he agreed. Neither made to move. Neither wanted to move.

She caught him staring at her out of the corner of her eye. Never mind the fact that she was staring too. She wished then, like she had so many times before, that she knew the right thing to say.

“What if we didn’t?” He asked, like it wasn’t this crazy, completely irrational thing to do. Like there weren’t so many people in the rooms behind them waiting on them. “What if we didn’t go at all?”

“It’s not even your wedding,” she said, turning to face him entirely. “Or mine.” He grinned anyway, sauntering over to the side of his balcony nearest her, leaning on the railing. “Don’t you think that would be rude?” They had been chosen for a reason.

“What do a best man and maid of honor even do anyway?” Adrien fired back, raising his eyebrows at her. “Past all of the party planning that we’ve already done, there’s just speeches and toasts ahead of us. I don’t think either of them want us reading our speeches, I planned almost every word of mine to embarrass Nino.”

She frowned, wishing she was able to resist it, but meeting him on the side of the balcony beside herself. He was so close that she almost thought she could leap. “And what would we do?”

“Stay here forever, find a way off this roof, run—Your pick, really,” he said, as if it was that simple. As if they could leave. It was her best friend’s wedding. “I know Andre’s stand closed years ago, but maybe if we’re lucky there’s another icecream man in Paris running around at night. I bet there’s one outside of the Eiffel tower, if you wanted to revisit old times.”

“And why would we do that?” She asked. This stupid, awful part of her was considering it.

“Because Nino just told me that he wanted me to be happy and that was one of the most important things to him today, and I bet Alya just told you the same thing,” he said. “But we’re not happy.”

“And?”

He looked at her like she was stupid. Maybe she was. He’d been out there longer than her, she could tell by the pink of his cheeks, maybe some great clarity had befallen him in that time, and he’d realized that she actually wasn’t all that bright. “Come over here,” he said.

“I am not coming over there.”

“Then I’m coming over there.”

“You are not coming over here!” Marinette declared, slightly astounded. “People are changing!” He didn’t seem to care all that much. “We’re not all models, some of us have shame!”

He laughed. Fuck, his laugh. She’d forgotten how good it was. “Meet me in the middle then,” he said, hauling a leg over his guardrails before she could protest. “I want to be closer to you.”

She was going to die because of him, she was sure, even if he was sitting oh so comfortably on his own railing. With her luck, she’d slip then fall to her inevitable doom. She could only hope that the bushes below her were soft.

“There,” he said once she’d settled, kicking out so that his foot lightly tapped her leg to prove his point, “Closer.” This was obviously some elaborate scheme to kill her that he had spent the last three years planning.

Almost as soon as she sat down, she began to second guess it. The voice in the back of her head was screaming for her to get up and go back to the suite. She could see the girls in the hotel getting ready to leave, Rose hauling up Juleka’s dress and Mylene reapplying Alix’s eyeshadow. She knew she should have left, sitting out there dangling herself over the edge of a building with Adrien wasn’t the best idea. She was supposed to be in there, taking care of things, fixing dresses and calming down nerves. But then there was Alya at the door, her face lighting up as she looked out at her, craning her neck just enough to see Adrien. She didn’t look like she missed her, only like she wished she could stay a moment longer.

She had to see it out for Alya, if only so there was finally an end to it all, a yes or no to the Adrien situation. Then she could be better, the kind of friend Alya deserved, one who wasn’t stuck in the past. Then she could dance at the reception with Nino’s cousins, and faun over men with Alya who weren’t blond supermodels.

“I know I should have told you that night,” Adrien said, drawing her back in. “And I did try to. Actually, I should have told you many nights ago, years even, but I don’t even know how to start now.” She closed her eyes, things like this were easier to take when you didn’t have to look. “I don’t regret disappearing, Marinette.”

There it was.

“But I do regret not taking you with me,” he said, and her eyes flew open.

If she hadn’t been holding on for dear life, she might have fallen off the balcony.

“Not just now,” he clarified, because it felt like a split decision. “But before too, so many times before. From the moment I left, I knew that I wanted to turn back, but I kept telling myself that I was doing the right thing. Over and over again, this is for Marinette. Marinette will move on. It didn’t matter if it hurt, you would be okay.”

“But I wasn’t.”

“You weren’t,” Adrien agreed. “I’m going to sound like an awful person, but I was happy about that. I was way too happy,” he admitted. “And this isn’t going to fix anything, this isn’t going to give you those three years back, this isn’t going to solve the problem an empty hotel room caused, and this won’t bring back Tikki and Plagg—But I’m asking you for just one second to give me this chance. I’m asking you to make the dumbest mistake of your life with me; to leave this party and everyone in it, to walk Paris again like it’s our city to own. For just one night, even though your body will practically ache with stupidity, disappear with me. Leave them all to wonder where we went, how even years later we always seem to miss things. Because I love you, even when you’re just walking on the sidewalk beside me and not saving the day, you’re my everyday Ladybug. Because I just want those moments back where it’s just you and I, and no one else knows who we really are.”

“And who are we, Adrien?” She asked. “The two biggest idiots in Paris?”

“A team,” he said, “amongst other things.”

---------------------------------------------

Epilogue:

Alya Lahiffe was dancing with her newly obtained husband when she saw it, a flash of red and black over the hotel garden wall. Her hands tightened around his neck as she took it in, a woman in a red bridesmaid dress and a man dressed in all black sprawled out in a heap on the ground, laughing after having practically tumbled over the brick wall surrounding the venue. They both looked from side to side, their noses nearly colliding with each other as they turned, both lighting up in laughter as they assumed the coast to be utterly clear and them to have snuck back into the party without anyone realizing.

“You okay, hun?” Nino asked as he looked down at her, taking in her expression.

“Yeah,” she grinned, watching as Marinette left only a peck on Adrien’s nose, resulting in the young man’s outrage. “I think I am.” She turned them, letting Nino see as Adrien reached for Marinette once more, dragging her down to kiss him.

“The absolute worst best man,” Nino chuckled, looking away as he pressed his forehead against Alya’s.

“And the most seasick, lovelorn maid of honor,” Alya said. “It’s a wonder they got anything done.”

“I give them a year before we get to pay them back, and we’re not skipping the ceremony. We’re giving bad speeches and throwing the bachelor party on a boat, doing the cupid shuffle—the whole nine yards.”

“And letting Marinette’s dad overload them with cake?”

“If he forgets any, we’ll just have to pull the samples out of our freezer.”

[broxklynn]

The End Of My Candy Love

Warning!

Alright, so. This post will contain a lot. First of all, it's gonna be really sloppy. I'm very emotional person and I easily get attached to games, movies and stuff. I know it's a bit weird, but yeah, I'm a weird person. Anyway, that's why there's a warning: there's gonna be a lot of sloppiness, grammar mistakes (at least I think so, specially since english isn't my native languange) and it's probably going to be long. So, if you're intrested in reading my thoughts about everything - good luck.

First Adventure

I first heard about "My Candy Love" in 2015, six years ago. So, I was basically a baby (I'm pretty young). And I started playing a year after, I got totally obssesed with Lysander and I fell in love, seriously, haha. I was into writing back then, but I couldn't find any ideas on "what to write?" and MCL gave me just that - inspiration (that's most likely why I'm just a romance freak).

My Story

You know, I was a child so I couldn't really pay for AP, but I always found some kind of way to get them. But then I got my phone I just used money from that, geez, I was nuts. The old AP system was so iconic, looking for Nathaniel, finding Kiki, I'm gonna miss it.

Anyway, I got along with Castiel pretty well (which suprises me 'cause I found about walkthroughs in 2017, like year after, so maybe it was because I was a brat?), but I adored Lysander. Oh, I also loved Ken (I was so sad when he went away) and Nathaniel. After I met Armin, I liked him too.

Again, being a child and playing a game like this I came across all diffrent kinds of emotions. I was laughing, crying, dying from embaressment (this thing with Nath and locker room, aaa) and getting seriously mad (Deborah's arc, Priya, Charlotte). I remember impatiently waiting for new episode to come out or crying my eyes out during Lysander's amnesia plot. Jesus. I loved the way Castiel was teasing Candy, I loved this cute-clumsy Kentin, I loved the old Nathaniel, I loved Armin and most of all - I loved my precious Lysander. I adored the interactions between characters, how funny or cringy they were and how much fun I had. I even like this secret-dating plot even when it got on my nerves. I still remember staying up late to watch videos like "lysander illustrations" and stuff. I also really enjoyed reading MCL manga and I spent hours trying to translate it from Spanish to English or my native languange (funfact: I still haven't finished it! I don't know where to find those mangas) or trying to draw something from the game up ending up terribly failing. Anyway, I was crying during the prom thing, my Candy was so grown-up, I got emotional, haha. So, 40 episode came in. I was pretty excited 'because, me, being extremely naive (I got to say, I've never had a problem with Beemoov before, I started playing MCL in 2016 and Eldarya in 2017, so there were no major issues with them, only the price of PA, I think) thought that my Lysander is going to propose (I was a child, ok?) and maybe, there's going to be a second season with us living together. Haha, how naive I was. Whole episode 40, really got me tearing up, I was a wreck, seriously (When Kentin couldn't take Candy's bra off I lost it or this whole ananas thing in Castiel's route, omg). But I finished it feeling happy. I truly enjoyed spending my time on this game. But, then this whole university thing came out. And the fact, that Lysander, Armin and Kentin won't be with us foe the next season. I spent entire vacation crying (I was a kiddo, ok?) and being mad at everyone. I felt like I got robbed. It was horrible.

"A New Chapter"

I was one of these people who just couldn't accept the change. Not in the world. Never. They stole my Lysander, Kentin and Armin from me and changed AP system to some kind of bullshit. God, I was mad. Really mad. Seeing Castiel was quite nice, but I didn't fill the void of my baby. But, oh, my, God. When I saw Nathaniel I just couldn't believe. I said I was mad? Then I was furious. I really liked the old Nathaniel, he had his own vibe, his backstory, his character and it was just, damn, amazing. But they changed him completely, for what? They wanted the second Castiel? Yeah, they got it. Priya as a love interest was quite a good move, tho. I even though I didn't like her (in highschool or in university) I liked the idea of adding a female interest. But the thing that hurted me, was the fact that Lysander was taking care of the farm. Like, no! He didn't want that. He didn't like the countryside. He had such a potential to become a author and Beemoov didn't let him. God, that broke my heart. Anyway, I didn't spent a single penny on MCLUL, but I have to say - I kinda enjoyed it. You know, it was the guily-pleasure kind of thing. I didn't like it as much as I liked highschool, but there were some good or funny moments. I loved Rayan's kiss scene. I adored Chani. Or Hyun making us watch "Toy Story". Nathaniel's ulgy green hair or all these crazy threesomes. I liked it. Kinda. I hated Nath tho. The ending, hm, it was okay, I guess? I do feel sort of nostalgic thinking about it 'cause I got some nice memories from it, in the end. But yeah, going on.

Love Life

Oh. My. Lord. I was so sceptical about it. Like, I was sure that, at this point they're going to do "My Candy Love Mid-Life Crises" next or some other shit. But in the end, I "kinda" like it. It wasn't good like highschool or fresh like university, but I was nice to see new chapters with our annoying-cringy Candy, that I love (btw, I started playing other otome games and I realized that Candy wasn't that bad). Meeting Eric was nice, even tho, this whole cheating plot really got me ragging. Like, damn, Beemoov, seriously? And if you going this, why not with old LIs? Just kidding. Anyway, I truly enjoyed meeting Dan and Eric, the two of them were quite a characters. I won't forget them, hah. I was happy with single ending, 'cause I think about it as a "open ending" when my Candy can go back to my baby and everything's going to be alright.

Regrets & Complaints

Now, now. Where do I start? AP system was a freaking nightmare. Replacing old Nathaniel with some kind of weird Castiel was a nightmare. Removing Lysander, Nathaniel, Armin and Kentin was a nightmare. Not finishing plots was a nightmare. And why in the whole Love Life I haven't seen Amber once? Why Alexy never mentioned Evan like they're not brothers? Why Castiel doesn't care that I was dating his bestfriend? And why, in the world, after changing the system finding Kiki is so damn easy? Why AP is so expensive? So many questions!

All The Good Times

But, I got to say. I will never forget this bitchy Castiel, cookie-monster Ken following us around. Or cute Nathaniel. Castiel buying Candy some kind of weird McDonald's. Or Lysander's parents exposing him having crush on Candy. Or seeing Kentin kissing Amber (ew). This super akward-funny sex ed lesson. Deborah's arc and losing my shit over it. Or Thomas (this weird child) stalking my Candy and her LI in the park. And Lysander asking us how to hide a body, aaa. Or Armin telling us he loves us. Or Kentin. And Cookie ripping this huge teddybear apart. Or the water fight in Kentin’s spin off. And crushing on Alexy and later on finding out he’s gay. Or spin-the-bottle game and Lysander getting jealous. Or Dake, being a creep for entire game straight. Or guessing what was guy's surnames. And for sure, I will never forget this demonic Kiki dog.

What it worth it?

In the end, yes. Have I ever told you that I want to become a professional writer? Silly dream, I know, but writing is a huge passion of mine, and well, my first story was based off My Candy Love (it is cringy as hell, but I feel kinda nostalgic thinking about it). All these years spending on playing game that I wasn't supposed to be playing was amazing. It was one of the best experiences I had in life and I will never, ever forget that.

What now?

Well, Beemoov is working on a new game and I'm kinda optimistic. I know, it's really naive of me, but I want to believe that they won't f*ck this up, this time. And going back to Sweet Amoris, well, I truly missed this place! And the teachers... And Kiki. I wonder, when it will be released and will Beemoov finally open up about telling us surnames and ages of love interests. Anyway, I want to believe they learnt from their mistakes.

In the end. Thank you, My Candy Love, for creating so many memories. I will be forever grateful. 

(I just re-read this post and it seems like I have really love-hate relationship with this game)

[kaylaxwrites]

Rooftop Confessions

Pairing: Matt Murdock x Reader Words: 1.9k Summary:  You like Matt. You have for a long time. After getting maybe a little bit too drunk, you end up confessing your feelings for him to Daredevil. Who also happens to be Matt. Request:  "How about a Matt Murdock x Reader? Where Reader has been crushing on Matt Murdock for a while and they are like long time friends, but she never acted on it because of his tendency to cut off everyone especially with his Daredevil tendencies so she thought the best way was to stay with him as a friend. She goes out drinking with Matt, Foggy, and Karen. Matt left early to go out Daredeviling where she said and got drunk. Later finding herself on the rooftop with him and accidentally confessing?" (anon) Warnings: alcohol consumption, reader gets drunk

Foggy cheered when you stepped into Josie’s, holding up his beer in salute. “Y/N, you made it!” he said as he wrapped you in a one-arm hug. Matt and Karen were seated at the bar next to him, each nursing their own drinks. You waved to them in greeting and settled into your seat at the end of the bar, throwing your jacket over the back of your seat. Josie slid your usual drink to you a few moments later.

“So, are we celebrating a big win or drowning out a loss?” you asked. The law firm had an important case today, one that would also hopefully score the employees of Nelson & Murdock a huge paycheck.

“Drinks on us!” Foggy answered, signaling Josie for another round.

You laughed. “Don’t get ahead of yourself, there, Nelson.”

“Hush up and drink.”

You laughed and downed the rest of your drink as Foggy pressed a shot into your hand.

You ended up celebrating a little too hard. It was nearing 3am by the time you, Foggy, and Karen all stumbled home. Matt had dipped out somewhere around your fifth drink, claiming he had paperwork to complete. You had been a little disappointed, to be honest, when he settled up his part of the tab and headed home. You spent too much time goofing off with Foggy and Karen and too little with Matt.

That was the case lately, or so it seemed. At one point in time, you and Matt were inseparable. You were best friends throughout high school and college and now… Matt was so distant. He hardly spent time with you, hardly returned your calls. The only time you got to see him was when you forced your way into his office at lunchtime. And even then he was always tensed, distracted.

You missed him.

Before he started pulling away, you had nearly gathered the courage to tell him how you felt. You’d liked him for a while now, since senior year of university—definitely probably even before then. It had taken awhile to accept the fact that you liked him, even longer to accept the possibility that you might never be with him. You didn’t know which was scarier: turning your friendship into romance or the possibility of being rejected and ruining your relationship. Until you could figure out which one it was, you pushed your feelings away until the right time.

But now you knew what the worst outcome was. It was ruining your relationship and never talking to Matt again. And that seemed like the path you were on.

You combed every interaction that you could remember with Matt. Had you done something wrong? Had you said something to turn him away? But the more you thought, the less you came up with. You didn’t remember ever letting it slip that you liked him or even shed some sort of a hint. You couldn’t remember any time you had offended him or caused him pain or even the last argument you had. You couldn’t remember anything to upset him so that only left…

You.

He didn’t like you anymore, romantically or platonically. You were different people now than you were when you were kids. He didn’t want to be your friend anymore or have any sort of relationship to you. But Matt was always too nice to break off any sort of friendship directly, so this had to be why he was pulling away. He was still friends with Foggy and Karen, so this had to be it.

The tears started to roll down your face. You were catastrophizing, you knew, but your rational self was overwhelmed by your drunk self who wanted nothing more than to cry. You hated being an emotional drunk. You shouldn’t have let Foggy coax you into taking tequila shots—this always happened.

You stumbled to the rooftop of your building, tears still pouring eagerly down your cheeks. You hoped the fresh air might calm you down some. Instead, your heart nearly burst out of your chest.

The sight of man in a red suit crouching on your rooftop caught you off guard. You shrieked and fell flat on your ass in your hasty stumble backwards. The man instantly spun to face you and took a few, slow steps forward. You tensed, waiting for something bad to happen, but then eased when your alcohol-addled mind finally realized who was before you.

It was Daredevil who was creeping on your rooftop.

“Jesus Christ,” you shouted, rubbing off your now slightly scraped hands. “You nearly gave me a heart attack! Why are you perched like a freaking gargoyle at three a.m.? Don’t you have somewhere to be?”

“Slow night,” Daredevil chuckled. He offered a hand to help pull you up and you took it, dusting off your legs now that you were standing. “Besides, I could also be asking you why you’re on a rooftop at three a.m.”

“I live here. And I’ve never seen you in my elevator before, so I’m guessing you don’t. So I have a right to be here.”

“Fair enough.”

A teardrop rolling down your chin and onto your chest reminded you that you had been crying not two minutes ago. You quickly wiped at your wet cheeks, hoping to remove all evidence that you were upset. But no luck. “You okay?” he asked. Damn.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m fine. Why do you ask?” You attempted a chuckle to throw him off, but the alcohol in your system had you going zero to sixty and laughed a little too loud. You grimaced when you realized what you were doing. “I’m a little drunk,” you confessed as your world turned a little and you stumbled where you stood.

“I can tell.”

You plopped yourself on a concrete ledge in the middle of the rooftop—even drunk, you knew to steer clear of the edge of the building. You patted the spot beside you and, surprisingly, Daredevil sat down. Far enough away to not be touching, but close enough to feel the warmth off his body. Like you were friends.

The thought had you choking up again. “Can I tell you something?”

“Sure,” he replied. He was gazing out over the city and not meeting your eyes, but you couldn’t tell what he was looking for.

“I know you’re a complete stranger, but I feel like I could tell you anything…maybe it’s the alcohol talking.” He hummed noncommittally and you continued. “I just…I’ve been needing to get this off my chest for a while now. And I know you help people, so maybe you could help me too, even if I don’t have anyone’s ass for you to kick. Well…maybe I do. I have this friend…we’ll call him…Matt.” You nearly rolled your eyes at your inability to come up with a fake name. A cool breeze jumped over the rooftops and you shivered. Daredevil tensed a little, but you attributed it to the chill. “Matt and I have been friends for a long time now, since high school, and I’ve liked him for nearly all that time. And I know he’s busy with work, but I feel like he’s pulling away from me, you know? We used to hang out all the time and now…I hardly see him but once a week. And I was so close to telling him I liked him, too, you know? I was planning on how I was going to say it and then he…pulled away. And now I don’t know what to do and I’m afraid it’s something I did or that he just doesn’t even want to be friends anymore. I just love him so much and I…” You cut yourself off before you would make yourself cry again.

After a moment of thoughtful silence, he spoke. “I don’t think it’s anything you did.”

You scoffed. “And how would you know? You don’t even know me.”

“There are some things I can just tell.” He paused. “Have you told your friend any of this?”

“No. What does it matter, anyway?”

He started a speech that was meant to help you, but to be honest, you weren’t concentrating on the words. You were starting to realize that his voice sounded oddly familiar to you. You squinted, trying to figure out who he was. You didn’t know him, did you? You raised your hand to cover the top half of his face. Maybe if you blocked out his mask and just focused on his exposed mouth and jaw, you could figure out who he was.

“What are you doing?” he asked, noticing your arm randomly hanging in the air.

“Shhh,” you quickly hushed. “I’m thinking.” You observed him for a few more moments—surely you’d recognize that jawline! And then it hit you. Your hand fell back down to your lap and your stomach dropped. “Matt?”

“What?”

“Matt, is that you?”

“No, I—I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He started to walk away, but you caught him by the wrist.

“Is it really you?” You tentatively let go of his hand, but when he made no move to walk away, you dropped it completely. You slowly reached up towards his mask, expecting him to pull away, but he let you pull it off and over his head. Matt.

“I’m sorry,” was all he said when his face was finally free.

“But…how?” you breathed.

“It’s kind of a long story.”

“Oh my god. I can’t believe this.” You began pacing back and forth, trying to wrap your mind around what just happened.

“Y/N, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. If I could, I would have, but I was trying to keep you safe—”

You cut him off with a wave of your hands. “No, no, I’m not even freaking out about that.” In the back of your head, you realized you should be because how was any of that possible? Instead, you were panicking over the fact that you just told Matt you loved him. You couldn’t even bring yourself to say the words out loud. “I just…”

“Confessed your feelings for me?” You hung your head, too embarrassed to even look at him. His feet stepped into your line of vision before he grabbed your hands in one of his, lifting your chin up with the other. “I’m sorry I’ve been pulling away. It’s just…this Daredevil thing as already hurt so many people close to me. I didn’t want it to affect you, either.”

“You don’t have to say anything,” you mumbled, throat tight from being thisclose to crying. “I know you don’t like me back. It’s okay. Can we just go pretend this didn’t happen?”

“I don’t want to pretend.”

Your eyes snapped to his. “What?”

“I don’t want to pretend this didn’t happen,” he repeated. “I’ve loved you for a long time.”

“Are you serious?” you gasped. Your heart fluttered. You wouldn’t be able to handle if he were kidding, even though you knew he wasn’t the kind of person to do that.

“I’m very serious. Since prom.”

Since prom? That long? Your mind was overloaded. “I don’t…I don’t know what to say.”

But you didn’t have to say anything. You were pulled to each other like magnets, slowly inching nearer and nearer until your lips were on his. It was all you had ever waited for. And it was well worth the wait.

After a moment, you pulled back. “We have a lot to talk about.”

“I know—”

“But in the morning?”

“In the morning,” he agreed.

[black-rose-writings]

I read Ruin and Rising because I’m bored

And I also hate myself

Like with the last book, I have a vague idea of the plot and stuff from tumblr and fanfics. I will also be refering to Darkling as Sasha for most of this.

I am still Darklina trash and don’t particularly like Mal.

On a different note, I’ve finally moved for college, but the internet here is trash, so I’ll probably have a lot more reading time now, since most games I play are online and will crash without internet.

Before

Cool story. Let’s hope Alina stays a badass.

Who am I joking, I know how this ends.

Chapter 1

So far so good. I hate the Apparat, per usual. Alina’s there basically dying and that bitch can’t wait to see her do so.

Cult leader to the core this one. He probably hates that his figurehead is alive and also not brainwashed.

Cult leader doesn’t like swearing. How surprising.

My boy David is completely right. What kind of irresponsible dingus keeps centuries old books in a fucking wet-ass cave? (Or a tree for that matter *cough cough* The Last Jedi *cough, cough*).

Genya is fun to be around.

Oh, shit, let’s go.

Chapter 2

Jesus Christ, Alina, Zoya isn’t that bad.

This is one hell of a shitshow.

I live for this version of Alina. Badass. Scary. I want more of this Alina.

Chapter 3

Out of all the random little details from crappy smut fics, I did not expect Oncat to be from the books, lol.

Mal actually has a supernatural tracking ability. Like, literally, they put a bug into the pouch with gunpowder so he could make the shot. I guess this was kinda said before, but never this directly, right?

Alina’s merzost-skyping Sasha now, yay.

Alina is horny for Sasha boy. Yay.

Alina canonically has a praise kink. Nice.

I hate LB with all of my heart at this very moment. How dare she bait us Darklina people like this? How DARE she? (Shipbaiting is the worst, seriously.)

Yes, yes, yes. These two lines. That’s what their relationship is all about. They’re each others foils, the yin to the other’s yang and... ugh. I am Darklina trash to the core and this hurts.

Darklina: You have a terrible taste in men.

Alina: I liked you once.

My boy Sasha walked into that one.

Chapter 4

Alina is a Queen. And we love her.

David, my beloved, my spirit animal.

It’s surprising they can read it at all, given it’s been centuries. Have you ever tried reading medieval manuscripts?

Honestly, with a father that crazy, it’s no wonder Baghra’s a bitch. And I’ve seen it said somewhere that the books imply Ilya’s experiments are what caused Baghra to be a shadow summoner and you know what? I can see how you’d make that connection.

Why is there so few Tidemakers in the books? Waterbenders are useful. I want more waterbenders.

Alina picking up some habits from Baghra I see.

Ah, yes, we love an educated giant.

I’m starting to think Harshaw is a bit nuts.

Shut up, Hershey. Or at least share the weed with the class. I’m not here for this “He’s mean to you because he likes you”. I might believe that in like, elementary school, but yall are (more or less) adults. Jesus.

Well, that was a bombshell of a twist.

Chapter 5

Oh boy, we’ve got some trauma bonding for out merry band of misfits. Yay.

Adrik has a crush on Zoya. And she hates it, lol. Cut the kid some slack, he’s like 15 or something.

That reminds me, I have a four-leaf clover pressed in books from close to year and a half ago. Time flies.

They’re really diving into the Mal has supernatural powers, huh?

Ghosts, let’s go.

Alina “I’m so happy to be outside I start to shine like a fucking fairy” Starkov and Mal is entranced. He’s definitelly nicer now. I’m not forgiving him for all the shit he’s pulled before and for using the silent treatment way too much, but hey, at least he’s improving.

I am not a Zoyalina person, but like... gay? Please? Rivals to grudging allies to friends to lovers, 300k slowburn? Sounds more fun than whatever Mala dn Alina have going on, lol.

(I’m starting to realize I’m not as much a Darklina person as I am anti-Malina person, lol. Like, literally everyone has a more interesting dynamic with Alina than tracker boy over there. Malina is at best boring AF and at worst toxic, codependent and emotionally abusive, while also being boring AF at the same time. It has literally nothing going for it except God herself liking it).

I can see why Nadia is gay in the show. The book version of her definitelly has a crush on Tamar. Homegirl likes a woman, who can murder her with the flick of her wrist and honestly? Same.

Alina has some big “coming out of lockdown after a year” energy atm.

The cat is one of the most realistic characters in this thing, lol.

And since Tamar is also heavily queercoded, our lovely ladies make off into the night, flirting. Or maybe not. Let me dream, though.

At least Blade Boy is aware that his tattoo is stupid. To quote someone ranting about him on tumblr: He’s embracing his identity as a tool.

Oh, boy, this will be fun.

Evil soldier is horny for Mal. Saints, is there a woman in this book who isn’t horny for Blade Boy?

And here comes Niki to save the day.

Chapter 6

Niki saved the day.

Fiberglass? And David being David. Genya being in love with her nerd of a boyfriend.

Jesus Christ, this one crazy kid has moved the technology in this universe a whole century on his own. So, when is David going to propose to him?

Baghra hasn’t changed much I see.

Baghra’s about to drop some truthbombs, but no, we have to be rudely interupted because Genya’s rapist is throwing a fit.

Chapter 7

How does Mal sound? Is she gonna say the Blade boy sounds like her dad? I mean, I know voices are partially genetic, but it has been tens of generations between them, probably.

So, we’re finally taking Genya’s trauma seriously after all this time? Good. Better late than never, I guess.

I wish that regicide was already finished and I’m pretty sure that Genya does, too. Stop defending the fucking king, narrative.

David’s a nerd in all things I see.

Someone please just kill the king already. And the queen, too, for good measure.

Now that’s a romance.

Infodumping and listening to said infodumps is a legitimate love language, Alina. Let them nerd out over poisons.

Wait, has Alina never directly killed anyone before? I thought she did... hmmm.

And just like that, it should have been over. Ugh.

Somehow, Baghra is a better teacher now than she was before. She half feels like a completely different character.

Nevermind, she’s back at it.

Chapter 8

Holy shit, Nadia and Tamar are canon. They have canon gays here.

So, which one of them is gonna die?

Chapter 9

We arrive at that scene. The one, where they should have fucked.

Jeez, girl, get a hold of yourself. Life is short, fuck a villain.

In other news, Genya and David definitelly fucked.

Chapter 10

Poor David. He just wanted to know.

Damn... I never realized just how young Baghra was, when she killed her sister.

I’ve already made a post about this, but it really does strike me like Baghra has already decided to end her life at this point in the book.

Why is that whole “but what if we’re related” thing even in there?

Chapter 11

We love a suprise attack.

When did Sasha boy learn that trick?

Baghra really just did that. Oh boy.

Chapter 12

No, don’t kill the kid... ugh.

Emotiona support cat. She should be friends with Milo.

Porrige for brains. Oof.

So Nadia was the one, who got bees set on her in the book. Cool.

That’s a good question. Why was it never brought up to Alina, that other Grisha get blocks, too?

David already thinking of steampunk prosthetic for Adrik is honestly kinda sweet.

Chapter 13

Back home... kinda.

Is that really... you really care about Mal bonking the Grisha school mean girl over a year ago? Okay.

Chapter 14

Angst! Yay!

And more angst.

Chapter 15

Sasha really went “My mom killed herself to save you? Well, I’ll kill the closest thing to parents you have.”

Chapter 16

Nikolai’s alive. Kinda.

And these two have such a sibling energy, I can’t.

And then they fuck. Ew.

Chapter 17

Wait, wait wait... so Alina isn’t even the one to destroy the Fold?

Okay. That’s... weird.

Holy shit. That was...

So, Aleksander is dead. Mal isn’t. Someone else destroyed the Fold for Alina and now she has no powers.

Okay.

That’s a weird-ass ending.

Chapter 18

The gays survived, so that’s nice.

Genya made good on her promise of making Alina a ginger, lol.

After

What emotion is this supposed to give me? Cause all I feel is kinda sad.

[vivithefolle]

What are your favourite fanfic tropes/aus for romione?

(I’m gonna try to make my way through old asks I received AGES ago and never answered because I’m a procrastinating lump. Here’s betting I’m going to give up and play videogames all day instead.)

Oh my god, so many.

Okay so as a rule of thumb as long as it’s nice to Ron I’ll read it. I’ll read anything. I have been known to read Ron/Draco and even sacrificed my dignity and everything I stand for as a human being by reading some Ron/Snape stuff. Yes. I was THAT desperate. This is how low I’m willing to go because of sheer love for Ron.

Which means that when a fic will go “oh poor Hermione, poor Hermione who is waiting for Ron to grow up because She can see one day he could be worth it but for now he’s all dumb-dumb and inferior and doesn’t deserve Her perfection :(”, I will be judging. Judging very hard. I may not leave a comment but rest assured, my thoughts are loud enough for me. This is 2010s mentality. This is “haha I’m so like Hermione, not like other girls who throw themselves at boys, I’m so special and girl powery :)” Horribly Bad Feminism. Fuck that. We’re doing better now.

Speaking of doing better. Recently I read something about how Ron is, paraphrased, “the brute of the Trio”, spun in a positive way since he uses his strength to protect them but, but, still... please no? Just no! Just eff no with these takes about how Ron is a hypermasculine dudebro M For Manly™! No, no, fucking no! Just because he’s the Sulfur to Hermione’s Mercury and Sulfur represents the masculine component to Mercury’s feminine one, DOESN’T MEAN Ron is “the brute”! (”the” brute... seriously... who’s the more brutish one, the one who punches a racist in the face or the one who uses a torture curse as retribution for spitting on his fave teacher?)

The way I see him, Ron is a balance, a blend of feminine and masculine qualities intertwined close together. I LOVE that he can swear like a sailor but can only say “scarlet woman” or “cow” when it comes to insulting a woman. Some will probably see it as “hurr durr he sexist he doesnt think women can take it!!!!!!! >8C” but given that those are probably also the peeps who say “HE CALLE D HERMOANI A NIGHTMURRR!!!!!!! DDDDD8″ I’m gonna venture the idea that we don’t care about those folks’ biased, sexist opinions.

Where was I going with this... oh yes! Ok, so Ron can swear like a sailor yet couldn’t insult a girl to save his life. He’s strong physically but most of all he’s strong mentally (to put up with the way his friends treat him for years speaks a lot of his mental fortitude... and to top it off he comes back for more to boot! I’m not sure if that’s more mental fortitude or straight-up masochism though.) When he succeeds at things he gets a bit attention-whoreish but at the same time, you can see that when he’s being complimented he’s all unsure of himself and blushy and shy and you just, dude you can’t handle positive attention because you don’t know how to react to it I don’t know whether that’s adorable or the saddest thing I’ve seen in my life? He’s insecure but he’s always the first to cheer on Harry and Hermione when they’re doing something great, which speaks VOLUMES of Ron’s selflessness and of his actual character: to quote @peetamaellark​, Ron doesn’t think “Harry is great, therefore he sucks and I hate him”, he thinks “Harry is great, therefore I suck and I hate me”. THIS is Ron. THIS is why Ron will lash out, not because he hates Harry, but because internally he hates himself and you can’t keep that sort of feeling bottled up for too long before... you got it, you explode.

I. Want. More. Fics where Hermione isn’t this ~oh dear~ Victorian damsel in distress who cries and Ron is the Big Strong Man who holds her with one arm and is stony-faced and goes “I’ll protect you”, please no that was old before it existed, let us have nice, realistic depictions of Ron and Hermione please.

Like, Hermione is more than capable of kicking butt herself. She IS absolutely nervous and scared and cries easily and that’s a vulnerability we NEED, but the fact that she can be super scared and crying but still hex her opponent into oblivion? THAT’s good, THAT’s excellent. It’s a very important message for girls, I think. “You can cry, you can be sensitive, you can be emotional, AND you can still kick butt”. And as important as that message is for girls, it’s also a very important message to give boys, because boys are socialized to “never cry” and that’s super unhealthy. I love Ron’s admiration of Hermione. I love the way Ron hesitates, the way he can be cautious when he needs to as much as he can be reckless and impulsive. I love how he shows himself to be a big softie and a sweet soul. I don’t think that makes him an “emasculated doormat” (to quote a guest I once saw on FFN), on the contrary it makes him an even better man in my eyes. You know why I love the locket scene so much? Because Ron’s tears aren’t ridiculed. Ron gets to cry about the terrible ordeal he’s been put through, and while Harry “pretends he can’t see Ron cry” because it’s more comfortable for him personally, he doesn’t try to tell Ron to “man up” or anything. His reassurance is pretty lousy but he lets Ron cry, he lets his friend be upset, and he doesn’t try to invalidate Ron’s pain. (ok, the “I thought you knew” is kiiiiinda on the way there, but it stops at that and I’m grateful for it).

I like. Seeing Ron distressed. I like seeing Ron upset and be allowed to be upset. I like to see Ron’s pain treated with respect. So when Ron is having a shit day I like to see him get a cuddle. I like seeing Ron go through horrible ordeals and break down and for his breakdown to be properly acknowledged and not turned into insensitive comic relief (ISN’T THAT RIGHT, LATTER HALF OF THE SILVER DOE????). I mean seriously, just imagine GOF, Harry sitting in the hospital wing after Cedric’s death, Molly Weasley gives him a hug and it’s all very sad and angsty. And now picture Ginny running into the room screaming “HARRY JAMES POTTER” and punching him over and over and saying “PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER MAN, PULL YOURSELF TOGETHER” then after two pages of Harry “explaining” himself to Ginny she goes away saying “aight but if you do that shit again you’ll have to answer to me” then Harry’s friends are like “damn she’s spunky huh?” and Harry laughs and everyone laughs and this is how the book ends? How would it be funny? How would it be appropriate? How would it feel like “romance”? When Ron returns in The Silver Doe, he’s been psychologically tortured (”tortured” is the actual word JKR uses, please), we don’t need him to be hurting outside as well.

I want more accountability for Hermione. More “uh hey Hermione maybe don’t do that”. More “hey Hermione you know you think of yourself as a good person buuuut yeah actually if all good persons were like you I’d be very afraid”. More “Hermione please for the love of God educate yourself”. More “Hermione sweetie I love you, but you can’t actually learn everything from books”. CHARACTER. DEVELOPMENT. PLEASE. Don’t be afraid to punch Hermione down and tear her apart the way the best Ron fics maim and torture our poor boy. Just because Rowling treated Hermione with kiddy princess gloves doesn’t mean you have to mimic her.

So when Hermione does a genuinely shitty thing let her own up to it. When Ron is a victim let him be upset and angry, even if Hermione is the one treating him badly. Just because he loves her doesn’t mean he’s not allowed to be disappointed in her or that she’s entitled to his immediate forgiveness. Give Ron and Hermione equal consideration. If you’re brushing off Hermione’s actions but condemning Ron for the slightest mistake, I am sure to hate it.

Okay, uh, so, those aren’t really tropes. Those are more just, guidelines I presume.

Oh, yeah, a trope that annoys me! Ron saying “you’re mine”, “my Hermione” and stuff, and Hermione just swoons and says “yours” and shiz. Ok, once in a while, why not. Once in a while. BUTT. I WANT HERMIONE TO SAY IT TOO. “Mine”, “my Ron!” and Ron swoons and says “yours, absolutely yours”. DO IT YOU COWARDS. FUCKING TAKE THOSE GENDER ROLES AND PUNCH’EM IN THE FACE.

Oh, right, while we’re on the subject of gender roles! Dad!Ron is everything. SingleParent!Ron is mwaaah. Stay-at-home-Dad!Ron is ALKZLDSJDLQSKLFJ <3. AnimalLover!Ron is HHHHNNNGG. Remember, the small gestures, the tiniest, softest acts Ron does (helping Harry get dressed when his arm is deboned, giving Dobby his brand-new sweater, praising Ginny, Luna and Neville when they escaped Umbridge), those are often those unremarkable, unmistakeably kind and sweet actions that tell us who Ron really is at his core: not a guy who’d want power at all costs, not a guy who’d give it all for ambition, not a guy who sees people as possessions, but someone kind who wants to make others happy.

Ok, I was also asked for AUs, so, uh, pretty much every AU is game as long as Ron gets treated with respect? I mean I don’t really care for Mafia!AUs or such but if you can find a way to fit good Romione then go for it I guess. Royalty AU, yeah why not but I often see Ron being made a prince while Hermione is a poor wee servant girl and like. Uuum, we’re talking about the same characters here? Hermione the highly educated girl who keeps on walking over everyone’s toes and loudly talking about how things should be done and is definitely Nouveau Riche, Ron who is a country boy who lives on a farm and is lost in the constant shuffle of his brothers, you think she should be the peasant and he should be the royal? Whaddafack? Oh, and all the “Hermione is a Muggle, Ron is a wizard” AUs that start this way BUTT! Suddenly... Hermione... turns out... to be (wait for it!)... A WITCH! And a super powerful super talented very good one too!!!... yeah ok, yawn. It’s quite scary, actually, how often I’ve seen that plotline, but in the rare cases when it’s Muggle!Ron and Witch!Hermione, Ron never ever EVER (I mean, seriously, NEVER EVER) turns out to have been a wizard, not even a mediocre one, all along. No, when Ron is made a Muggle for the sake of AU he stays a Muggle. But when Hermione is made a Muggle she has to turn out TO HAVE BEEN A WITCH ALL ALONG OMYGAH. I can count on one hand the number of Mugglemione/Wizardron fics that actually stick to their Mugglemione premise till the end - and usually they’re one-shots. (Also I don’t mean “Ron mistakes Hermione for a Muggle because he meets her in the Muggle world and assumes he must hide his magic from her, oh wait she was actually a witch!” fics, I mean genuinely “Hermione has been raised a Muggle her whole life, never had weird things happen to her her whole life ever, then Ron comes in and is a wizard and he does magic and Hermione wonders what it’d be like to be a witch and oh surprise! Don’t worry Hermione, you won’t have to feel not-special or mundane for long, here comes the plot contrivance to tell you you really were in fact the specialest of them all!!” fics.) Fairytale!AU is cool. Very good. But honestly I like to see them swapped around. Ron cursed by a nasty fae to be a Beast and Hermione stumbling upon him? Neat, especially if you don’t go the boring route of “oh let’s just rehash the Disney/the original book with different names and call it a day”. But Hermione cursed by an asshole fae for, let’s say, not sharing books, turning into a Beast, and Ron stumbling upon her as she’s trying to survive in the woods (and not doing a very good job of it)? Yes, brava, chief’s kiss. Rapunzel AU where Hermione’s bushy hair turns into the most impractical, most suffocating improvised ladder ever for Ron? Hilarious. Rapunzel AU where Ron has A GIANT EFFING PONYTAIL OF THE GODS and is screaming “ow ow ow” as Hermione makes her way up to his window cringing and saying “sorry! sorry! sorry! (damn his hair smells good)” on every step? Equally hilarious. Go! Be creative! Please I beg of you

Creature!fics! Oh my god there’s not enough of those, at least that aren’t focused on a bullshit pairing! Soulmate AUs! Give me everything! I’ll even take A/B/O if you insist on making it Romione! That’s how far I’ve fallen from human decency I’ll take anything just give me some good Ron content please I beg of you (Ah and to those that are going to say “Alpha Ron Omega Hermione :)))” well yes, but actually no. “Beta Ron Beta Hermione”? “Beta Ron Alpha Hermione”? “Omega Ron Alpha Hermione”??? HELL YEAH NOW WE’RE TALKIN)

Oh dear god I’m still not finished and I haven’t gone through everything someone stop me.

AND NOW BE CAREFUL CHILDREN, BELOW WILL BE SMUT.

Okay I don’t know if it qualifies as a trope, but. But. A more realistic depiction of Ron is usually what I’m after. All those fanfics that have Ron be “the sexy experienced one ;)))” ravishing “naive virginal Hermione ;))” is just UGH. We spent all the 2000-2010 period having fics like this, mind adding a bit of EQUALITY to the mix???

It’s just... I hate it okay? So many fics read like they’re just projection, writers who are essentially making Ron their big strong sex toy stud who's so attentive and sweet and cherishing, and so it does indirectly ends up as "servant Ron is so devoted to his goddess Hermione, providing pleasure to her while she doesn’t have to lift a finger”. The Dom!SexGod!Ron thing honestly depresses me... Since it's Ron taking care of Hermione, AGAIN. Like, he spends his WHOLE LIFE doing that already. Can we give him a break for once?

In the endI feel that it's less "Romione smut" and more "self-inserting into Hermione smut". In "real" Romione smut I think Ron and Hermione would switch roles according to what they feel like. And honestly I ALWAYS picture Ron being super nervous during Dom stuff, like he spanks her once then immediately he goes "oh my god are you okay?? did that hurt, do you want to stop?", things like that. I cannot imagine it happening any other way. XD Ron is just... too caring, too sensitive to do stuff like hard BDSM and that kind of thing in my opinion. He’s too much of a caretaker. I understand if it’s your kink and you’re perfectly free to project and write the fic you want, I’m not the fun police, but it’s just... I don’t think that’s really what Ron would be like. I just want MORE realistic Ron.

Also I’m trying really really hard to not point fingers here but WHY is it that it’s always “Ron growled” while it’s always “Hermione whimpered” or “Hermione moaned”? Like... you know it’s okay for a man to moan or whimper in pleasure too, right?  You know Ron isn’t 110% muscles and testosterone? You know Hermione is allowed to be fierce too? Hermione can 100% “growl” and be dominant and pin Ron to the wall and reduce him to a puddle of goo if you’re brave enough?

(Honestly how sexy would Ron think that is? The woman he loves is half his size yet can pin him down and ravish him. DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG RON HAS WANTED TO BE RAVISHED AND CHERISHED DO YOU KNOW HE’S BEEN WANTING THIS ALL HIS LIFE)

Oooo-kay, so that’s... mostly it, I reckon. Oh also Ron has a gigantic penisraise kink (and a great penis too, but mostly a praise kink). That’s canon and that’s all.

[nighttimepixels]

TALK TO US ABOUT MASS EFFECT I HAVE BEEN AN INSANE MASS EFFECT/SHAKARIAN TRASH PERSON SINCE 20-FUCKING-11 AND LEMME TELL YOU THOSE FEELINGS HAVENOT TARNISHED A SINGLE FRACTION IN THOSE TEN YEARS OH MY GOOOOOOODDDSSSS!!!!!!!

I DEMAND A PLAY-BY-PLAY UP TO THE MINUTE OF YOUR REACTIONS TO EVERYTHING!!!!

you are so valid and I totally see why everyone I've ever mentioned it to loves the hell out of it

aksdjlsdfj I meannnn if you want to hear my rambling about it then hell yeah

Okay, gonna put this below the cut to save everyone else XD also- since I'm not leaving this Mass Effect obsession anytime soon, if you're not interested in seeing occasional posts about it, please feel free to block the tag "night plays ME"~

(mild spoilers ahead??)

((also for real I mean it when I say this is rambling as hell lol, apologies and no stress if absolute no one reads all this))

OKAY SO Mass Effect 1-

Stars help me, I was honestly hooked right from the start?? Like even in Legendary Edition (the combined trilogy just re-released in one "can play it on one system + minor improvements", for anyone who doesn't know) where it's smoothed out, of course it's obvious that ME1 is a decade old... but the foundation for these relationships are all there and gods I love them already.

Like - Kaiden right off the top is a delightful good fightin lad, what the hell. I've heard that he's viewed as 'bland' by a good portion of the fan community but I dunno, he's a delight and even more complex by the time 2 rolls around and you encounter him on Horizon, it was honestly Ashley I was way more meh about - mostly because before you can learn about her family history/etc, she comes off as hella xenophobic and I was immediately offended for my growing space family that she didn't like/trust all the aliens around, pfff.

(she gets redeemed a bit through further actions/evolving thoughts, but I thought in retrospect it was a bummer that they didn't flip the order there, give her a chance to be liked before the complicating factor of being so rude about aliens >:c that then she could grow from... ah well. Apparently she has a good arc but uh, let's just say I chose Kaiden at the "key junction" in the latter part of the game so I won't be seeing anymore of Ashley uh... anytime soon, haha.)

Garrus??? Is??????? The ABSOLUTE best???????????

I liked him from the start, I'm always a bit of a sucker for a rogue-detective "the system won't bring this bastard to justice, so I've got to" type and all their moral shadiness XD But he just gets better, honestly, and where I'm at in ME2 (right before the Reaper IFF mission, as of typing this, with everyone's loyalty!) I am only digging myself deeper into this hole-

-*wheezing* okay anyways -

Wrex is AMAZING I love fightin' middle-aged krogan bastard, gods. Liara is great too, I'm a sucker for a wlw relationship (playing fem!Shepard, so) - buuuut I'll admit she's a bit more one-note in ME1. Last week while I was still on ME1 I remember hearing (while trying to dodge spoilers) that her arc is really good, though. I think they leaned a little hard on the 'innocent but sexy' sterteotype on her (so despite the yikes aspect of a few of the things I've learned in ME2, lol, I actually really like the complexity that's been added to her character.)

Saved Liara first, so by the time I got to Noveria and had the standoff with Benezia there was the chance to have emotions over Liara having to face her TwT and of course, I made the questionable but quality decision to free Queen Rachni heheh. no ragrets

More than a blow-by-blow of my choices though I totally wanna take the chance to say that even in the mild jankiness of ME1 (goddammit, the Mako.... please..... please just go up this impossible cliff I just want to resource hunt-) the way that the lore, both obvious/key to main plot and the lesser/filler/background/world-building kinds... I just love it. It incorporates it well, you can go ham in the codex learning more, or just dive into the basics - it's clearly a complex galaxy (and they do an even better job in 2 of fleshing it out further), and it never really felt overwhelming. It was pretty natural figuring it all out-!

Plus the interesting implications of resource hunting amongst the sapient races, and the little side missions you better bet I did every one of- there's so much rich depth in the story if you do 'em!! (And that lead with that Keeper side mission...? Looking back, damn, clever foreshadowing-!!!)

And oh my gods, Ilios??? hell yeah. I loved that mission so much, especially having Garrus & Kaiden with me when talking to the hologram/computer, and more than anything, that last sprint in the Mako trying to get to the jump before it closed-???

yeet the boi-

Also mannn I love a good setpiece, and having to go up the side of the elevator, space-side?? such a cool setup!!

Plus it felt good having been Paragon enough (as simple as the good v bad vibe system is, I don't hate it, lol) to avoid one of the Saren fights, ngl. And the er, "second fight" with Sovereign-Saren.... hell yeah

... I'll admit I had to double check my choice re whether to save the Council. I did in the end, but I swear, sometimes the way they phrase things I'm like ".... okay but Garrus is right, defeating Sovereign is more important than these few leaders??????" woops. Listen, priorities, is all I'm saying..... (￣ヮ￣|||)ゞ

'Course later they emphasize (in ME2) that there were 10,000 people on that same ship and I was like well I wouldn't have second guessed if I'd known that, I mean c'mon-

Also I did indeed romance Liara in this one, so I got that scene ;Dc But,,,, I also knew by the end that I was totally gonna romance Garrus in 2 since he's an option then finally,,,,, lemme tell you the guilt as I waffled over whether to romance Liara bc of it. hahaha.

Aaaaand Mass Effect 2-

So I'm only up to right before the Reaper IFF Mission, so I don't know the ending, etc etc lol. That said, I've just finished every side mission I've found with the exception of the Shadowbroker Quest and the Arrival Quest (I've heard the latter basically leads into ME3, and the former is best either right before the Omega 4 jump or in postgame).

So from the start - fuck yeah fuck yeah what a high adrenaline start Shepard noooooo but also yes save Joker aH-

The motion comic too hot damn nice job

I loved this setup, seriously - especially forcing Shep into this situation, having to work with/for Cerberus, and the compelling reasoning given behind "why" they do what they do (I especially found it a good point that the Salarians have the Task Force, the Asaris the Commandos, the Turians the- etc... like, true, when you put it like that, having a similar group advancing human interests/solving human interstellar problems is pretty reasonable...). That said, I love too that it really isn't shied away from how Cerberus is nonetheless fucked up - or its at least done fucked up stuff.

Listen, I still think some messed up stuff is gonna be revealed in 2's endgame......... after that Horizon mission and the Collector's ship???? TIM I SEE YOU YOU SHADY MF-

aaanyways lol...

I'm so so glad on a gameplay level they nixed the Mako style exploration. A few Hammerhead missions are fine and a lot more focused than the slippery ass navigation in that glorified ATV, pfff. The probes are a neat way of getting after similar resources - and more importantly, having good levels and some good hubs (the Zakera Wards, Omega, Ilium, etc) is way way more fun than having a more 'sprawling' space that is.... a lot of empty nonsense, lol.

Then there's the fact that we get Joker right off the bat and you can interact with him so much - and him and EDI??? Get out gods I love them. Kasumi is so right when she says they sound like a bickering old married couple lol. I have a terrible feeling that some shit is gonna happen with EDI..... but I don't think she's evil as-is, at least.

Side-eying the hell out of those "access forbidden" parts of her that she doesn't even know.... and the fact that her AI core has a locked door access................... something's gonna happen gdi LEAVE OUR ADOPTED AI ALONE.

(Also Joker pls stop fracturing your thumb on the mute button)

Also please save me there are so many hot aliens in this game,,,,, the xeno/monsterfuckers really comin' through strong in the sequels............... doin' the lord's work........................................

In general, I love how many levels ME stepped up in two with complexity and interwoven narratives!! Like, to the point it'd be almost a drag to replay ME1, even though it was fun going through it (if occasionally a bit tedious with the cookie cutter rando planet science/mine facilities, lol). Like, just from how fun and interesting ME2 is, mostly! more of all the pre-introduced races, plus new ones, plus more filling in of intragalactic politics, and more interesting implications of all these space-faring races mixing....

Also gods WREX and his planet holy shit,,,,, fuckin' hell yeah my man get their shit together and also adopt Grunt yes good-

And Mordin??? My singing semi-evil scientist best friend forced to confront his choices more than he thought he ever would have???? With some of the best ongoing general report chatter of all the companions??

(when I tell you I choked on my coffee when I talked to him after confirming romance choice w/ Garrus and that 'pamphlet' and 'anaphalactic shot if ingesting-' kajsldkfjsldfjk)

Like, fuck, the fact that they actually dive into the mixed morality and horrors of the genophage, and you can confront Mordin on it, for good reason, yet he still stands his ground, until finally some bits of his loyalty mission seem to... affect him, and I'm guessing might set up things for 3 with him? Unsure, but either way, damn, the fact that they start to dig into it...

And Taliiiii my beloved forbidden alien wife TwT her loyalty mission was SO GOOD. I love how varied they all are?? Getting to defend her and discover what she'd unwittingly been a part of-!!

Zaeed is a bastard but tbh I love that he is and that he's unapologetic in him - and Kasumi omg, best thief. A heist?? Gods, yes- I love our couch lounge chats XD

Samara is..... illegally.......... she's an illegally powerful and beautiful and eloquent MILF...........................

(.... listen I'm sapphic as hell and I'm kicking my own ass for picking her up last aksjdlfksjdfl - but her loyalty mission, damn. And seeing how there's this interesting cultural subset, and the struggle with the Asari in that they unquestioningly accept/respect justicars, but also know that the impact outside their culture is a diplomacy nightmare waiting to happen-)

,.,,,,,T,,, Thane,,,,,

I am weak for morally implicated murder dads okay?? And that voice??? His mannerisms?????? How you first see him, and that prayer after assassinating her...???????? And his history/his people's history with the hanar, gods I love how messy it is, it feels so much more real!

Also Jack is a mess and I love her (and want to get her some therapy, omg), and her and Miranda nearly duking it out after you've done both their loyalty missions??? so good and makes a lot of sense-! Honestly I would love more interactions between teammates on the ship, but there's already so much the devs had to balance I can't blame 'em for minimizing, heh. But suffice to say I also love Miranda and Jacob, even if I'm softest for my alien crew XD Hell yeah Jacob, we'll get loud and spill drinks on the citadel indeed TwT

.... I could write a whole essay on how much I love Garrus oTL Perhaps because he and Tali are the throughlines from 1 on your 2 crew, I have some of the strongest feelings about them... but genuinely, he was one of my favorite companions in the first game, and how you find him as Archangel in two? Getting to help him fight his way out after he's gone nearly 48 hours straight fighting off three gangs alone, jfc. His vengeance quest and what can happen there.... That line? fuck me, that line -

It's so much easier to see the world in black and white. Grey? I don't know what to do with gray...

How DARE you come for my heart like this, devs holy shit

(also, some other choice faves so far from the series from him include We can disobey suicidal orders?? and This wasn't in my training manual... [in 1, if you have him with you @ th Thorian fight] and his whole.... pop the heat sink - in his romance ;Dc)

asdasdfksadjfkl like I said I can write an essay on him PFFF suffice to say I'm very looking forward to his romance scene and where things go in 3

But yeah gods I'm just gonna keep rambling if I'm not careful lol. Gods I don't even know what to talk about it's all so good and while I can understand people roasting the obviousness of Paragon V Renegade (v neutral) choices/alignments, I think they do a pretty damn good job in 2 of pushing it further - to the point that there were some times that I accidentally got renegade points and I wasn't that mad, haha. There's so much fun in the interactions that I just have a good time anyways~

I have so many thoughts about TIM (The Illusive Man) and Cerberus.... theories evolving galore............... and like, what the hell!! Omega 4 going to the center of the galaxy is such a cool twist, goddamn - though my heart still breaks at losing Kaiden (his line if you haven't romanced him?? about feeling like he lost a limb when he lost you??? holy shit.... but I also can't blame him for not trusting Cerberus to the point of it affecting his ability to trust Shepard... like fuck Shep go after himmmm) I'm really excited to see where that goes since he comes back in 3, and what the fuck happens with Cerberus bc while I love the fact that obviously there are a lot of people in it for the right reasons, doing good work, there are those that are doing the opposite, and I have a very bad feeling about where TIM will end up landing....

All that said though I need to do the Reaper IFF mission (where I'm lightly spoiled as to getting That Boy, but not how/what happens to make it so - just that it's apparently wise to have all your side missions done before getting him...) and the actual Omega 4 jump. So we'll see what happens and what I think about it from there heheh!

.... major kudos and genuine props if you made it here to the end, I am so sorry for not editing on condensing all this, and appreciate you so much ;w;

[hatsukeii]

hey! could i request boyfriend! sousuke, makoto and rin headcanons? 💕 thank you!

yusyusyusyusyusssss

lmao I’m straight binging free rn deadass alr done w s2 and it’s been like 2 days 

Sorry but Rin>>>>>>>>>>

Anyways onto the headcanons!!

All gender neutral btw:33

*Gifs are not mine:>

🌊Yamazaki Sosuke🌊

- Yikes I feel really bad for not liking him until the end of season two-

- But anyways,

- Sosuke is um... kinda dense I feel like. 

- Like he doesn’t really catch up on cues.

- The two of you could be out and there would be these girls staring at him.

- He would literally pay no mind and get confused when you start pulling him away.

- “(Y/n)? I thought you wanted to go into that store?”

- “Sosuke those girls are staring, we can come back later.”

- “Huh? So they’re staring, what’s the deal?”

- “Sosuke wha???”

- Yeah, that. 

- But don’t worry, he has eyes for you and YOU ONLY!!

- Lmao I feel like he’s popular with girls but he’ll just turn them down straight up.

- “Sorry, I’m not interested, and I already have a partner.”

- Yike feelsbadman.

- Okay aside from all that, Sosuke is honestly an AMAZING BOYFRIEND LJAHDAWHD-

- He’s very stoic in public, kinda harsh, but he has that one soft spot for you.

- Extra soft spot.

- With you he’s super caring, very sweet, protective, just sjkhncef yes.

- Definitely gets jealous sometimes when you’re getting too touchy feely with another guy.

- God forbid you to hug a guy in front of him.

- He isn’t one to boast or show you off, he’s very lowkey with the relationship.

- Not much PDA, maybe a little bit of hand holding or finger linking but that’s about it.

- When the first years found out you two were dating let me tell you they were shook.

- Momotarou was very, very jealous, to say the least.

- Probably didn’t get intimate until like months into the relationship.

- And no I don’t mean intimate as in sex but like kissing or sth like that.

- It took him some time to warm up to the idea of just a relationship, but kissing? Even longer.

- He had this mindset where it was like oh if I kiss her then I’ll start drifting out of focus and I’ll forget about swimming and then my dream is going to be out of reach and-

- Yeah, he still kissed you so...

- When he found out about his shoulder you were the first one he turned to.

- He couldn’t let other people find out, but he trusted you.

- Awww he was devastated.

- He definitely didn’t cry for hours.

- And he definitely didn’t make your shirt wet from crying.

- And he absolutely did not refuse to let go of you at night when the two of you were about to sleep.

- Great boyfriend material, 9/10 would recommend bc of the obliviousness.

🐢Makoto Tachibana🐢

- He’s the man.

- Like THE MAN.

- You’ve reached the top of the list.

- God DAMN HE IS SUCH A GOOD BOYFRIEND.

- He’s genuinely caring, understandig, a tiny bit awkward, super sweet, if husbando material was a person, this would be it.

- He likes PDA definitely, but not like extreme PDA.

- Hand holding, maybe an arm around your waist, occasional peck on the cheek in public, about that.

- Not one to show you off but wouldn’t mind doing that if anyone asked about it.

- “Yeah, I do have an amazing partner, thanks for asking.”

- Likes it when you play w his hair!!

- He’s just so supportive of everything you do oh god.

- You like gaming? Hell yeah, he’s cheering you on. You’re an artist? Draw him like one of your French boys. You’re a dancer? Hypes you up when you’re busting it down.

- Awww and he’s such a dork too!!

- If you guys have a movie night, pick a horror movie.

- Baby is so scared of the paranormal that he’ll be clinging to you throughout the entire thing.

- “Mako, it really isn’t that scary-”

- “We’re moving out if this apartment is cursed.”

- “Mako you don’t even live here yet.”

- Jumps so hard at jumpscares and just shoves his head into your neck even further.

- It’s like an extra cuddle session.

- Except you’re laughing your ass off and he’s so scared that his soul probably left his body.

- Very soft spoken, and he hates to argue.

- I mean if you guys fight you’d usually just feel bad and apologise first.

- *cough because he usually never picks the fights.

- Lots of bear hugs and cuddles!!

- Is the big spoon, will forever be the big spoon.

- Okay he tries to cook he really does.

- But he’s so clumsy oh god.

- Usually results in the food being weirdly sweet, or an entire bag of cheese accidentally dumped onto the floor.

- Thank god he hasn’t burned the apartment down yet.

- Just help him cook man he can’t do it himself.

- Good at pretty much everything else though.

- Actually enjoys doing domestic stuff.

- I feel like some of the swim club members were jealous of you-

- Okay maybe not jealous but definitely envious.

- Honestly it seems like they would happily take your place and date Makoto but can you really blame them??

- Overall 10/10 because he seriously tried to sell your apartment on eBay once after a horror movie.

🦈Rin Matsuoka🦈

- Oh god where do I even start.

- ROMANTIC.

- SUCH A CLASSIC ROMANTIC.

- THAT SHIT IS LITERALLY CANON AND I LIVE FOR IT.

- Definitely PDA.

- Will kiss you in front of people just to piss them off.

- Shows you off ALL THE TIME.

- “Oh you can cook? Well so can my partner.”

- “Oh you need help with maths? My partner’s amazing at it gimme a second lemme call them.”

- Lmao it kinda annoys the swim club.

- “Rin senpai, we know you’re not single, you don’t have to rub it in...” ~Momotarou

- Does he care? No.

- Cheeky little shit, I love him-

- Will get jealous very, very easily.

- “Babe, that dude was looking at you weird, can we leave and come back?”

- “Awww is my baby Rin jealous~?”

- “Shut up:)”

- Will not hesitate to fight anyone that hurts you.

- Takes you on the cheesiest dates.

- Beaches, stargazing, nice restaurant, libraries, anything that he’s seen in those old romance movies.

- And he’s such a gentleman when it comes down to it too.

- Holds the door open, gives you piggyback rides if you’re tired, literally kisses the back of your hand before every date, you name it.

- Oh my god I’m so in love w this cheesy awkward dork-

- He’s got a lotta shit bottled up so do expect him to get moody at times.

- Nothing a good cry and cuddle session can’t fix though.

- Likes to feel you curled up against his chest while he plays with your hair.

- Presses your head closer so you can feel his heartbeat just like those kdramas portray it it’s not like he watches them or anything-

- If he’s crying then you’re gonna have to do the cuddling.

- Do the same to him as he does for you when the two of you cuddle.

- Except also stroke his hair and tell him everything’s gonna be okay.

- He needs someone to show that they care thanks for coming to my ted talk.

- When you’re upset he’ll probably start crying too.

- He can’t stand to see someone he cares about upset.

- Hypes you up whenever he gets the chance.

- Will do stupid shit just to see you smile.

- He’s actually very emotional and sensitive, so please take care of him.

- The dynamics in the relationship though like wow they’re insanely good.

- The two of you are just straight vibing.

- Overall 11/10 because I’m clearly biased😌💅.

[seodami]

Neon green | LYY

Genre: soulmate au, fluff, friends to lovers, some frustrated feelings,...

Warning: none (besides cursing like 2 times)

Word count: 4071 (oopsie hehe)

Pairing: Trainee!Liu Yangyang x reader

Note: I am so excited for participating in the ✨NCT secret Santa event✨ I want to thank the organizers @neoculturechristmas for preparing such a cool collaboration! It is such a nice idea and I am really excited to read all the other stories. I really tried making it a bit winter themed in the beginning but oh well I think i failed haha. But if you squint ITS THERE I SWEAR :)) So this one is for you @theleemark :) I really hope you like it! Merry Christmas ✨

“Yangyang stop it!” You laughed while running away from the boy, who currently was chasing you like a maniac through the park. His arms were loaded with dozens of big white snowballs just ready to be thrown at you.

Your feet felt like they were sinking even further into the deep snow layer on the ground with each step you took. It was impossible to avoid your best friend any longer. And before you could complain further, the ice cold snow ball hit you right on your already pink cheek.

You let out a loud scream, not being able to move. The prickling pain of the cold snow overwhelming your senses.

Yangyang however couldn’t stop laughing looking at your face. Running the last few meters to you to catch up, he tackled you down into a hug, which unfortunately ended with both of you laying in the deep snow. Your jeans were soaking wet at this point. An icy feeling shuttered down your spine.

“Yangyaanggg...god I hate you.” You fumed frustratedly, hitting your best friends chest. “Get off me! You are heavy...” your weak arms tried to lift the boy above you up but bitterly failed.

Yangyang giggled into your neck, standing up by himself while helping you up as well. “Hey I’m not heavy. More like heavenly, don’t you think?” He wiggled his eyebrows teasingly with his usual smile as he posed like a supermodel.

As hard as you tried to keep pouting and stay angry at him, you couldn’t stop the laugh from bubbling up behind your hands. A grin immediately made its way onto his face. “Isn’t snow so dope? Like you can literally do anything you want. It’s like a movie.” He babbled excitedly.

You couldn’t help but secretly admire his beauty once again. Lately you’ve been catching yourself a lot staring mindlessly at him when he was busy. Even when it was just him pouring boiling water into a ramen cup. Maybe it was all the mushy lovey dovey Christmas romance content on Netflix you’ve been simping over the last month or just Yangyang himself but you were certainly sure, he definitely got more attractive in your eyes.

Still it was something you would never ever in your dreams confess to him or talk about. Especially since there wasn’t really any sign that you two were connected as soulmates. He was just...well...just your best friend. And you had to live with that.

You still remember the way you two became friends. It was a very fond memory of yours and little do you know, also for Yangyang. You both were in 5th grade back then, being the little Chinese kid who showed off his tiny German skills and the clumsy half Caucasian girl with braces. It was hilarious how well you two got along besides the differences.

You two were in the age were kids began to talk about soulmates and their soulmate connections. From writing on the arm to body switches or color blindness, everything was there. In school you briefly have learned about all the indicators and the bond itself, but you seemed to always be the odd one out. There had been no sign whatsoever. Nowhere on your body. Nothing. Niente.

It was frustrating at first. You found yourself way too often admiring older girls who already found their soulmate or had unique indicators. You were quite jealous of them back then.

But then you found out you weren’t the only person without a soulmate connection. There was Yangyang, who went through the exact same emotions as you did. Even if he didn’t want to admit it, he didn’t want to be lonely.

And that is how you two bonded immediately. After this, you were always together. You acted as if you were glued together, never leaving ones side. You felt safe around each other.

Adults always told you to wait and see. That yours would come sooner or later. But nothing. 9 years later and you and Yangyang still haven’t found your soulmate or anything related to soulmates. It still frustrated you at times but being the positive person you were, you just accepted it with the time.

From time to time a lot of people happened to mistaken you two for soulmates. It always made you think ‘what if’...

Your poor heart already had been through so much because of this boy. It wasn’t easy to ignore your small crush on him starting back in 7th grade. You were both growing and having loads of hormonal crises, so it was understandable at some point. But seeing that this crush hasn’t gotten any less since then, you were just totally lost.

‘Stop it y/n! He is not your soulmate! He is not...’

You snapped yourself out of your daydreams and staring as you found Yangyang smiling brightly at you. “Oh damn y/n, lately you’ve beeen really drifting off with your thoughts.” He noted as he slung one arm around your shoulder, walking with you towards your apartment, making sure to not forget your groceries at the side of the tree.

“I noticed...maybe I should just get some more sleep.” You mumbled in your sweater paws in order to warm up your freezing hands. The boy besides you let out an airy laugh while squeezing your shoulder affectionately. One habit he unconsciously took over, over time.

“Oh yes you should. Weren’t you like playing games up until 4 am last night? You sure you aren’t a zombie by now?” He joked looking over to you, you both nearly choking from air as your eyes met, making your hearts race a bit faster.

You nodded quickly focusing on the snow on the ground again. “I kinda suck. How do you sleep at 12 am already? You’re a wonder kid.”

He shrugged his shoulders, still watching you. “It’s in my genes to be a wonder kid.” His joke made you giggle slightly. Yangyang was as always Yangyang. And you found it incredibly charming. You could never deny that.

After the short walk from the snow covered park to your apartment with all of your hands filled with full grocery bags, you decided to bake some Christmas cookies before Yangyang had to head back to his shared apartment. Ever since he began training in SM entertainment as a trainee, he hadn’t that much time like he did before. But either way, you were incredibly proud of him and always happy to spend some quality time with him.

You were lucky that none of your roommates were home, visiting family over the holidays or hanging out with their partners.

It was probably the best that you were alone because you both made a whole mess in the kitchen. It was so much fun hanging out after a long time but it was a hell of a ride to clean it all up.

When the moon was already at its highest point and the night air got even fresher and chillier, Yangyang hugged you goodbye with butterflies dancing in his stomache. He would always treasure these moments with you and think about them again when he was so hardly trying to fall asleep. It was like his mind was full of you 24/7. Even if he tried staying focused on his tasks, it would most of the times end up with him thinking about your laugh and smile as you sat on the couch next to each other while making fun of the twilight characters.

He wanted to scream in his pillow how devestatingly in love he was with you at this point. You made him just so overly happy. He wanted to be near you so bad.

And people noticed. They noticed how Yangyang showed his deepest hidden personalities only to you. His playful and quirky side but also his soft and vulnerable. He simply could be himself around yourself. And you felt exactly the same. You would tell him even your deepest secrets. You knew he would keep them safe.

Yangyang was surprised to see his fellow roommates and friends still awake in the living room as he arrived home. Ten, Hendery and Lucas were all sprawled out on the couch, seemingly waiting for sleep to take over them. The flat was confusingly quiet despite the slight background noice of the TV.

“Hey guys I’m back! Why are you still awake?” It was silent for a short while before Hendery suddenly stood in front of him, making him jump by surprise.

The older boy watched him with a growing smirk and exciting twinkling eyes. “And? Did you tell her? Please say yes, we all stayed awake just to hear the news.”

Yangyang let out a sigh, he didn’t know he was holding and stripped out of his jacket. He knew this question would come but not this soon. “Just let me breathe for a second alright? I’m gonna tell you everything.”

Ten in the background let out an excited scream. “Yangyang! You did it? Ohh finally manning up and confessing...I see.” The teasing but excited tone in his voice was as clear as daylight.

“What? No... it’s not like that...” Yangyang tried to explain the situations to his friends as he walked inside heading towards the living room with Hendery behind him.

Groans came from all sides. “You didn’t?! Oh man I really thought you finally would. What are you afraid of?” The older boys words stung inside of the youngest. He shrugged his shoulders sitting besides Lucas on the couch, grabbing the nearest pillow.

“I don’t know. Like I really don’t know. She’s absolutely amazing and so stunning but...” he placed his head on the pillow with a deep sigh. “But...I feel like I’m just a coward. Just thinking about that we probably are not soulmates or never be an actual couple. It all sucks. I wish I could just tell her...”

All the boys were deep in their thoughts as they listened carefully to Yangyang sorrows and worries. They knew they needed to help the kid in some kind of way. This had been the fifth day he decided to confess but all the prior nights turned out to be a failure. He just wanted his heart to be opened by the one person he loves the most. But it felt like there was a thick layer of securing foam around it, just waiting to be ripped away. If it was just that easy...

“Hey...I know this might sound stupid but since you seem pretty lost...I might have an idea how it will be easier for you to overcome yourself.” Lucas suddenly interrupted his train of thoughts, smiling brightly at his roommates. “Oh lord...please don’t say something stupid.” Ten prayed next to him with his hand holding his forehead.

“Tell me more.”

And that was how the plan was born.

A bulletproof plan in Lucas and Henderys eyes.

And a totally stupid one in Ten’s opinion.

But Yangyang did it anyways.

Cause he was desperate, frustrated and so full of love, it was impossible for him to think 100% straight. And he did it only for you. With the intention of getting your attention in the fullest way.

It was dyeing your hair. In freaking neon green. Cause what’s a better way to show your feelings than dying your hair in your crushes favorite color?

A lot actually. But Hendery and Lucas were absolutely confident that it had something to do with the human psyche and the law of attraction or whatever they called it. Their belief: you will fall for him immediately by the time you see his hair.

The only problem with this was that this plan was obviously not thought through yet and that the only hair coloring product in this house that came the closest to your favorite color, which was green, was a bright neon green. Yuta brought it over once for Ten to dye his Neon green highlights. And Yuta indeed could pull it off.

But Yangyang began to regret ever listening to his older friends again. He looked ridiculous. Looking himself with a frown in the mirror of the bathroom at 3 am was definitely not how he imagined this day to end.

Lucas lightly joked that he at least looked somehow christmasy. But then on the other hand Hendery couldn’t stop laughing about his own joke that he found his list highlighter. It was a mess. Ten wouldn’t even want to look at his hair and when he did, all he could say was “I told you”. It was even more frustrating.

All he could do now was sleep and wish it all just had been a dream. He didn’t really had the urge anymore to show you his hair. All he wanted to do was think about you laughing and running in the snow earlier today. And he really nearly forgot his hair dilemma for the night.

You on the other hand decided to go to sleep earlier that night since you nearly hadn’t gotten any sleep at all because of your assignments for university. It was more than exhausting for you to stay up till morning to finish up all your projects. Yangyang had to force you to go to bed at the end of the day and you didn’t even complain with his soothing voice telling you stories, slowly tugging you to your dream world.

The next morning, you woke up groaning with a heavy headache. One look at your phone and you could see it was 6:30. With a long sigh you fell back into your comfortable pillows, scrolling through your phone. Why did you have to wake up that early again? Right...university.

After what seems definitely too short for your liking, you finally climbed out of your bed, trotting towards the bathroom. There was no sign whatsoever that the headache would just go away by itself.

But as soon as you looked at yourself in the mirror, you let out a deafening scream. Your heart was thrumming as fast as never before and your adrenaline was rushing through your whole body. You couldn’t find a way to properly breathe at that exact moment.

“Oh my god oh my god oh my god... please let this be a dream. Nonononono. Fuck.” You mumbled to yourself while your hands searched for support at the border of the sink.

Your eyes met in the mirror in front of you. Neon green eyes. Neon fucking green. That... that was not good.

There were so many questions in your mind all at once. But one thing was sure. You wouldn’t set a single step outside of this apartment. No one could ever see you like that. You looked like a monster. As you tried rubbing your eyes continuously or trying to find a contact lenses inside of them, you came to the conclusion that you were damned.

There were many possible explanations:

1. You somehow slept too less or have some sort of hallucination due to whatever.

2. Yangyang played a prank on you and is just waiting for you to call him.

3. You suddenly have gotten a really rare disease or disability over night.

Or the most likely one (except for Yangyang and his prank maybe)

4. You just found your soulmate connection.

Your eyes widen with realization and shock, as you came to the conclusion that this could be your possible soulmate indicator. You have learned so much about them in school and by yourself that you could easily tell what it was.

It was a rare connection. But it was possible. Having your soulmates hair color as your eye color. You were 80% sure that was the reason.

The other 20% you just thought about Yangyang. How he couldn’t be your soulmate. He would have told you that he was planning to dye his hair in NEON GREEN. What in the world was this even for a hair color?

You sat down on the floor to grasp your wilding thoughts and sort out your over rushing emotions. You couldn’t pinpoint why, but your thoughts drifted off to said boy every two seconds. It made no sense at all but your subconscious probably just wanted to tell you how stupid your feelings for the Chinese boy were. He still was your best friend of many many years. You knew this day would come. The day you would finally realize that you were no soulmates. Despite all your deepest wishes.

The whole situation was nearly ironic. Neon green eyes? That could only happen to you.

With wobbly legs you waddled over to your bedroom to pick up your phone. The blood from your hands nearly disappeared all at once and left your fingers cold as ice. You pressed Yangyangs caller ID without even thinking. You knew it was still very early and it was his free day but this was definitely an emergency.

Unconsciously you began biting your finger nails nervously, trying to think straight but failed. Everything was all over the place.

After the nth peeping tone, you could hear some dampened muffles on the other side. “Y/n? Why is- are you calling?” You heard the boys broken morning voice through the speaker, gently tugging on your heartstrings. Your heart wasn’t ready for this that early.

“Uhm...I ...well Yangyang? I kind of have a big problem and I cannot leave the house. Can you...if it isn’t too much trouble... I mean come over? I just- I really don’t know what to do...” you rambled on, not knowing what to say in a situation like that. He had to see it himself to understand. God that was awful.

More ruffling could be heard, followed by damp footsteps. “Oh...yeah sure. You sound really frustrated Y/n, is everything okay? Should I bring you something?” He questioned you with concern mirroring his voice. You shook your head, remembering he couldn’t see it.

“No it’s fine... I just need some really good advices. Its just weird. You will see when you come.” You explained to him, still biting your finger nails. “Alright I will be there in a bit. I’ll still bring you some chocolate tho, that’s always one solution.” Yangyang tried to lift up your seemingly worried mood, succeeding immediately and earning a chuckle from you.

“Thank you. You are the best. See you soon.” The line went dead and left you with a more comforting feeling than before. You were still sure everyone looking at you would scream out loud but at least Yangyang was there for you and could buy you contacts or whatever. You were always thankful to have someone like him in your life.

Not half an hour later, said boy rang the bell to your apartment. You prayed to god that none of your roommates got up because of the noice. You wouldn’t want anyone to see you like this... except for Yangyang.

In a hurry you put on a pair of sunglasses, you found on your dresser before running to the door to let him in. It wasn’t your intention to scare him away in the beginning, even though you know he would never.

The Chinese boy looked tired when you opened the door but you could still see the worry written on his face. He wore a black beanie and his long padded jacket. He looked absolutely adorable for you in that moment. But realization hit you when you couldn’t see any differences from yesterday. The heavy feeling immediately made its way to your heart. You felt horrible. You were right, he couldn’t be your soulmate. How stupid you were...

“Y/n what’s the problem? Why are you wearing sunglasses? Did you hurt your eye? Did someone hit you?!” Yangyang lowkey panicked. You dragged him inside, leaving him no time to remove most of his clothing items besides his dirty shoes.

You pulled him into your room exhaling deeply while pushing him gently on your bed to sit down. You stood in front of him still with your sunglasses on.

“I...I found out my soulmate indicator. I did right this morning.”

There was an indefinable silence in the air for a second. There was a slight drop in the boys facial expression. His heart ripped open like a bag of candy. Spilling all his content. “Wha-what...” was all he could mutter. His gaze drifting off to your feet, trying to get his thoughts straight.

“I don’t know I just...woke up like this...please don’t scream.” You scrambled nervously, taking off your sunglasses slowly and revealing your neon green eyes to him.

His mouth dropped immediately. With hammering heart and shaking hands he subconsciously reached for his beanie. If his emotions would ride the wildest rollercoaster, it would be this moment right now. Everything was all over the place but his heart lead it’s way.

Your big eyes fixated on the neon green mop of hair on top of Yangyangs head. It was hard not to forget how to breathe in that moment. “Yangyang...” you whispered softly, stepping closer and reaching for his hair, which was exact the same color as your eyes. “You...what?! Why didn’t you tell me? I was so... worried.”

He looked into your eyes, not finding fear or shock, no, there was happiness in them. Pure happiness, which surprised you immensely. There was a small smile on his lips. “Worried about what?” He reached for your hand. Emotions spilling over the top.

You sat down next to him, turning your body towards him. The blood was rushing so loud through your ears, it was hard to focus on your own thoughts. It was now or never y/n!

“About having someone else as a soulmate than... you. God it sounds so cheesy but it’s true.” You chuckled nervously wanting to chew on your nails but being stopped by Yangyang. His smile grew even bigger, letting it impossible for you not to smile.

He suddenly pulled you into a tight hug, giggling like a child. Your hands searching grip on his fluffy jacket. A warm feeling spread through your whole body. You felt wonderful. Like all sorts of sorrows and worries had been taken away from you. Immediately.

“I’m so so so happy Y/n... so happy.” He mumbled joyfully in your shoulder. He squeezed your body tight. “I wanted to confess to you. So many times. God I really fell hard for you and now I know why.”

He looked into your eyes once again, surpressing a laugh but still sending you heart eyes.

“I’m sorry but you really look ridiculous. I’m so sorry about that. I had no idea.” You nodded playfully glaring at him but still leaning closer into his touch, wanting to be even closer to him. It was a weird feeling. But everything just made sense to you now. Every single moment and feeling in the past. It was all because of your soulmate connection. You were soulmates all along and you never had a clue.

“Oh you better dye that hair back right now to black or you wait for neon pink eyes yourself.” You warned him playfully. “Even though you look like a Christmas tree... I mean it’s kinda cute.” You admitted playing with his hair in hope for him not to see your incoming blush.

Yangyang grinned to himself, unable to hold back his emotions as he saw your pinky cheeks from the compliment. He felt so giddy suddenly. “Hendery and Lucas were absolutely convinced that you would fall for me easier when I’d dye my hair in your favorite color. Unfortunately they only had neon green one left at this point in time. Please remind me to never trust them again. That was a horrible idea.”

Your heart swelled up by his words. “You did this because of me? Oh Yangyang...” your hand went to his arm. You would lie if you didn’t feel flattered in this moment. “You’re such an idiot... but a very very cute one.” You smiled at him in awe, “I appreciate it. But by all means please let us dye it back.” You both began to fall into a fit of laughter, unable to stop.

“Deal. This hair and your eyes should be banned from this country.” And with that you could proudly say that you finally found your soulmate. The person you were in love with all along. Your best friend and partner in crime. Liu Yangyang.