#the formatting might be fucked up but meh

[hxpelessnurse]

"Remember the sound that could wake the dead? But nobody woke up at all. Somebody died for this Somebody died for Just One Kiss..."

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[abrcmswrld]

Talk to Strangers

Edward Nashton x Coworker! Reader

━━━━

Word Count: 4,951

Warnings: smut (18+ only MDNI), stalking, unprotected sex, angst and fluff and smut, a decent bit of tears, obligatory mentions of murder

Summary: You’ve warmed up to Edward despite his cold nature, but what happens when the puzzle pieces start to fall together and you can feel someone watching you in the darkness?

Authors Note: I actually tried so hard on this yall, I posted this to my ao3 page first so I am sorry if the formatting is all kinds of messed up on here :( This is my first fic i’ve posted since 2017 so I sincerely apologize if it’s meh, i also don’t have anyone else proofread my fics so i apologize for any errors i missed! enjoy!

Ao3 Link

He's arrogant. Oh so arrogant, and you can't fucking stand it. You watch him every morning as he strides in, past your desk at reception, white button up shirt, clear framed glasses, shaggy hair that falls over his forehead . He's certainly not a hit among the office, so maybe you're not wrong in your feelings. Though your other co-workers generally regard him as a pushover- not a self-absorbed asshole. He's good at what he does, sure. He's earned his spot, but he often brings a shadow into the rooms he walks into. A presence that you can only describe as infernal.

You don’t know much about his story. You generally pride yourself on getting to know the people you surround yourself with, but he has never let you get close enough to find out. Maybe that’s why you find him arrogant. He thinks he’s too good to speak to you for more than two sentences related to files he needs you to fax for him. What you do know about him is that he’s been at KTMJ for longer than you have been- maybe 5 years more. You can still remember the first time you met. You were fresh faced and eager. Seeking validation, in desperate need of some stability.

You extend your arm for a handshake. His hands are slightly clammy as he accepts your handshake. And though you had greeted him with your brightest smile (might as well go all in if you ever wanted to be anything other than a receptionist) he hadn't smiled back. He'd kept a rather straight face as he gave his brief introduction. "Edward."

Now you have a sense of stability. Sure, the quality of life in Gotham is subpar and you still haven't received that promotion, but you make enough to live comfortably in comparison to others in the city. You try to count your blessings.

━━━━

You had already been having a shitty day. Your landlord had informed you of an increase in rent rates by slipping an envelope under your door. Sure, it sucked to be asked to pay more for an apartment that could be deemed shitty by any normal person with a pair of eyes, but it was the lack of communication that got you. Not even the decency to call your residence and tell you with their own voice. Just a slip of paper under the door.

But you tried to bring a good attitude to the office. You hate being the one to damper the mood. You would rather leave that to him. Always him. Never smiling back at you as he walks through the door, never meeting your eyes to acknowledge your presence, nothing. And you were used to that. It would be okay, if it weren't for the stack of papers that laid on your desk when you got in. Neatly stacked with a green sticky note reading "Need copies. -Edward" scrawled in messy handwriting. You immediately feel the flames rise into your chest.

It's a quick stride from your desk to his cubicle, stack of papers tightly tucked into your fist. You slam them onto his desk as soon as you reach it, and he raises an eyebrow at you in response. "What the hell is this?" He glances at the papers and back at you. "The copier isn't working. I wrote what I needed." You sigh, annoyed at the fact that he doesn't understand.

"You couldn't have waited for me to get here and brought them to me yourself? I would really appreciate it if you would treat me like a human being every once in a while, ya know, actually acknowledge my existence." You realize how dramatic you must sound, but in all honesty you've been thinking it for years, it was only a matter of time before it came out. "I needed copies. I didn't think my acknowledgement meant that much to you." He holds his hands out in defense, feigning that he actually cared if he had hurt your feelings.

"I think you think you're smarter than everyone else here." You plant a hand on the table in front of him as you crouch to his level.

He sighs and you can see the corners of his mouth twitch. "I do. Is that so bad?"

"It makes you an asshole."

He finally faces you.

"Better to be an asshole than to be an idiot."

His voice doesn't carry any malice, yet the words feel like a slap in the face to you. It leaves you scrambling for a response, opening your mouth only to close it a second later. Until you decide to merely respond with a nervous chuckle. Sure, you thought his response showed his ego, but you had to admit. He got you. He faces you once more at the sound of your light chuckle, green eyes meeting yours completely. "I guess you're right."

You catch the corners of his mouth turning upwards.

"If it means that much to you, I will greet you next time."

━━━━

And he does. Greet you that is. You find yourself talking to him more and more. Sitting in the break room with him at lunch, looking over his shoulder at the crossword puzzle he works on at his desk and giving your best shot at an answer, relishing in the furrow of his brows as he turns to look over his shoulder at you. He's an asshole. He's arrogant. But there's something about him that's drawing you in. Sometimes you feel like a fish caught in a net. All those moments he'd brushed you off and yet you find yourself repeating the little quirks of his soft smiles in your head. You hate the term "work husband", but it seems that Edward is slowly becoming the very definition of that.

You don't speak outside of the office, but you find yourself gravitating towards him when you're stressed. You tell him about your landlord and the reason you had gotten so defensive with him. He understood.

"It's a cesspool here. None of these people actually care about people like us, not the landlords, not our coworkers, certainly not the politicians." He had said in that moment.

As October rolls around and the leaves begin to fall, you find yourself beginning to bring two coffees to work, one for you, one for him. He always shows an appreciative nod. But the moment you start to think about asking him to actually go out with you for coffee is like being the fish pulled out of the water and accepting it's inevitable fate. You were gonna let him drive you insane.

You're sure of it as you are caught up in the nerves and find yourself softly grabbing his hand to stop him outside the front doors of the office. You quickly pull your hand from his. no doubt blushed a deep red. But he just stares, waiting for you to speak. You clear your throat. "I- um- Sorry, I was just gonna see if you had plans now." And it pains you the way he doesn't speak, just continues to stare.

"There's a diner on the corner near here. I think they have decent pie."

He loosens the tension in his shoulders and looks down. "Oh. I'm actually sort of drowning in... paperwork right now." He shifts his weight from one foot to the other, clearly uncomfortable. God, you hoped you hadn't made him uncomfortable. "I'm sorry."

You quickly shake your head and let out a breathy laugh. "Oh no! It's totally fine, I probably have paperwork to finish too." You hope it hides the pang you feel in your chest. "I'll see you tomorrow." You swiftly turn and walk away before he can respond.

━━━━

But you wouldn't see Edward tomorrow. Matter of fact you wouldn't see him for the next three days after Halloween. You try not to let it bother you.

It's the beginning of a cold November, he's probably just sick or desperately needed a vacation. Or perhaps you'd seriously fucked it all up and he couldn't even stand the sight of you. You can't stop the deep sigh that comes from you as you rest your forehead in the palm of your hand. Embarrassingly, you ask Zach if he's heard from Edward. Not that you expected him to be particularly helpful. "Are you guys, like, fucking?" You are stunned and stammering your words. "Wha- No! No. I just worry about him."

"Look, I wouldn't worry about him too much, I mean the guy's basically a fucking recluse. When do you ever see him outside of here? Maybe it's good that he's somewhere besides here."

Still, there's no chance of you actually focusing on work and you find yourself aimlessly scrolling through news headlines, before one in particular catches your eye.

'Mayoral Incumbent Donald Mitchell, Jr. Murdered in his Home on Halloween Night.'

Holy shit.

━━━━

Edward is back at work after three long days, and despite your worry of his annoyance and anger, he is oddly elated.

It's the first time he approaches your desk. Leaning against it, coffee cup in hand, and flashing an awkward smile before asking, "So did I miss anything?" It leaves you a little taken aback, but it's a relief to see him approach you willingly after your last conversation.

"Um yeah, Zach was a total prick as usual- Oh! And our mayor was murdered."

He raises an eyebrow and takes a sip from the coffee cup. You feign annoyance, "No but seriously where were you? I started to wonder if that psychopath got you too."

He smiles. "Just sick. November weather and all."

━━━━

The first time you see the green mask you are in a huddle of coworkers around a computer screen.

'Police Commissioner, Pete Savage, Murdered. Killer Leaves Shocking Confession.'

"My God. What a sick freak." Zach interjects.

You can barely stand to watch. The video is hardly graphic aside from the disturbing voice of the masked man, but the implications of what happens when the video cuts off leaves your stomach turning. You walk away. Desperate for some space, but also desperate for a distraction. Edward sits straight in his office chair across the room. You hesitate slightly before striding toward his desk and leaning your weight against it. You can feel the sweat beading at your forehead as you lightly brush hair from your eyes. "Shit."

It's merely a whisper to yourself, but he turns his head to face you. For once his face shows concern towards you. Yet he still says nothing, only looks. Observant as always.

"Sorry. I needed to get out of that." You gesture towards the group of coworkers still huddled and murmuring among each other. He glanced back, before turning back towards his work. "The news?" He inquires quietly.

"Yeah. It's a little too much for me to stomach." There's a little pause as if he is hesitant to say anything before finally replying, "They were pricks. Don't you think they kind of deserved it?"

You straighten up, looking at him with shock. "I think they were still people with families." He frowns at you before you finally walk away from his desk to make your way to the restroom. You needed to get a grip.

━━━━

Edward apologizes for his insensitivity after work. You had stayed with him outside of the building long after all of your other coworkers had left. "It's fine." You refuse to look at him as he lights a cigarette and gets in a few quick puffs. You're being mean. But if you're honest the combination of his rejection and his comment earlier in the day had set you off. "And I'm sorry for last week." Only then you look up at him.

"I've had a lot going on, and it feels a little unfair to bring you into all of that."

"This feels like an excuse to let me down easy. It's okay if you just don't want to go on a date-"

The feeling of chapped lips on your own stops you mid sentence. He tastes of coffee and cigarettes and you crave more, but he pulls back quickly. His free hand remains at your cheek, holding your face in a gentle caress. "It's not an excuse. Things are just complicated for me right now." His eyes never leave your face. It's the best look you've gotten of them. Of him. His features are gentle behind shaggy hair and acetate glasses.

Something feels wrong and eerie in the back of your mind. Like seeing him this close gave you a sickening feeling of deja vu. Things were definitely complicated. The bags under his eyes were showing his exhaustion well, he had gone from elated to unwell since his return. He seems like a broken man, but he'd never let you close enough to find out why. You can't help but feel the connection, like he deserved a shot even if he didn't want it. Even if he thought he was smarter. Even if there's a side to him that could hurt you. You push down your feelings of uneasiness.

You press a chaste kiss to the corner of his lips.

"When you're ready."

━━━━

You're awake nearly all night the next weekend. Spending the entire time digging through news about the figure known as The Riddler, his possible next targets, possible identities, and most importantly all of the video footage he'd put out in the last few weeks. It's certainly not healthy. You generally steer clear of these sorts of things. Years of therapy had gotten you far and you would rather not ruin it by desensitizing yourself. But you can't help it. You find yourself going deeper and deeper into the rabbit hole until you find yourself tuning into his streams late at night.

He speaks with such a confidence in himself. As if he has all of the answers, and is just waiting to enlighten the world. His followers are even more terrifying. They'd do anything for him. You wonder how low a person must be in life to resort to this sort of behavior. But, you're not a psychiatrist. Who are you to speak on these people. These strangers.

"We are going to cleanse this cesspool of city."

You slam the laptop shut.

Sleeping isn't easy after this sort of activity. You should've known. You turn on a show you don't actually care about to give yourself some sense of security in background noise. And soon you find yourself drifting asleep. It's not great sleep. You can sense yourself tossing and turning, but you can deal with it. Everything is fuzzy until you find yourself on your back.

Paralyzed.

It's not uncommon for you to experience sleep paralysis, but you've experienced it less after your time in therapy. You try to keep your breathing steady, trying to convince yourself that whatever you see is merely a hallucination.

Shh. Shh. Just breathe.

But the figure that appears is familiar. That's what scares you the most. The green coat and mask is horrifying as it inches towards the bed, and you can't scream. you can't move away. You can only watch the blood drip from his gloved fingertips onto your floor as he stares. Tilting his head at you slightly, as he brings a hand up to his head. You can hear your heart pounding and you are practically internally begging yourself to wake up. The latches on his mask pop open and you're horrified to find that the face underneath is so familiar. A slight smirk on lips you have kissed before. Blood dripping from a hand that you've held before. You try to scream. Tears falling down your temples until he is suddenly gone and you shoot up in your bed.

You can't hold back the cry that escapes your throat. It wasn't real, he's gone, and you're safe in your room.

━━━━

Until suddenly the safety of your room begins to feel a lot less safe. You hear it. The creaking of the floorboards at night, the slight tapping against the glass of your bedroom window. The slight squeak of leather rubbing and rustling together. You're too scared to open your eyes those first few nights. You'd rather be blind and take your fate than die in paralyzing fear.

But you know it's him.

It was never unclear what was staring at you in the night. Maybe the nightmares of the leather gloves touching your skin hadn't been nightmares at all. You want so badly to be sickened. To run into your bathroom to empty your stomach out of panic and fear. Instead you feel a strange mixture of annoyance and arousal in your gut.

He thinks he's smarter than you.

You find yourself playing into his games.Attempting to one up him. To show him you aren't scared of him. That you can keep up. You begin to deliberately change in front of your window. Letting lacy fabric hit the cold floor and standing just a tad longer, stalling before covering yourself back up.

You hope he's watching when you peel off your work tights. You hope he's imagining himself on his knees tearing the delicate fabric from your form, only to be blocked by a thin pane of glass. You wanted the upper hand.

You hope he's watching as you sink two fingers into yourself, thinking about crisp, white button ups and clear framed glasses.

━━━━

The next few weeks are tense at work. You heard the news of what happened to Gil Colson at Don Mitchell's funeral. Edward would walk in everyday, and attempt to greet you, only this time it's you who is short. You have a little hope that he can't see straight through you. But you can see it in the way that he looks at you that you're an open book. Who's to say that he won't just watch, but actually kill you to keep you from talking. But deep down you both know your lips are shut tight.

So you work through the days, just ready to get home. You can hardly stand to look at him. It makes you feel like you're an accomplice. A sitting duck for a man who probably doesn't even care about you, withholding a tip to the police because deep down you really do like him. And you had hoped he liked you too until things got complicated. Now you think it would just be best if he abandoned you right where you were. But he doesn't. In fact, he suddenly has more courage than you'd ever seen from him. It's evident as he catches you by your arm and pulls you into the alleyway beside the office after work is over. It's dark and you'd be lying if you said you weren't scared, but he kisses you like nothing is wrong. Like he has no clue. Like nothing has changed.

You pull away from him, wide eyes staring back at him. "Are you okay?" He asks quietly as he brushes a hand up your arm. You can't help the break in your voice. "I know, Edward."

He just stands and stares. "What?" You take two steps back. "You're killing people." He continues to stare. He drops his hand from your arm. The silence scares you more than anything. But he simply sighs.

"I think you should go home and get some rest."

And before you can argue he walks away with a quickened pace.

━━━━

So you do. You return to your shitty apartment and try to compose yourself. What would he do now that you said that? Maybe you were wrong. Maybe you had accused him of something he genuinely didn't do. But it didn't feel wrong. You sigh as the hot water hits your back. You had hoped a shower would help you feel refreshed, but for the first time in a while, it feels like a chore. You can't enjoy it, so you rush through it. As you step into your bedroom you stop in your tracks. The window is slightly ajar, a cool draft flowing in tingles your bare legs. And then you see him. The figure in the darkness of your room. This time you're not dreaming.

He's in your room. You're paralyzed. The position you swore you'd never let yourself be put in. He's got the upper hand.

He just stands there. A part of you wishes he would attack you. Kill you. Anything just to break the still silence. You realize you're shaking. You agreed to play his game and now you're trailing his lead, allowing yourself to be beaten.

"Edward."

It comes out as a shaky whisper, but he visibly takes it in as he steps toward you to close the distance. You can see his eyes crinkle at the corners through the green mask. He's smiling. And he reaches a gloved hand to your face, cupping one cheek. You can feel the warmth radiating from his hand even through the glove. So, he is human. The Riddler has a beating heart and flowing blood. He is not a cold, lifeless monster. His stoic frame you had become so familiar with at work was gone. He catches a tear from your cheek with his thumb.

He is terrifying.

"No more through the window. I'll be gone soon."

Before you can entirely comprehend the statement and it's implications, your brain forms the word that leaves your mouth. "Gone?"

He simply smiles again, this time reaching his hands behind his head to abandon the mask he had come in with, and there he is. Cherubic features glowing under the street lamp light that flows in from your window. "I watched you live for a month. I watched you eat, sleep, undress, touch yourself. But you knew that right? Otherwise you wouldn't have put on such a show."

You attempt to struggle away from his grasp in disgust at his words but he holds you tight in front of him. "But that's alright. I'll tell you the truth because I hate liars. I liked knowing that you were doing it all for me. I wanted nothing more than to cleanse Gotham, to give them true salvation, but you put a dent into that plan. You became a distraction that I foolishly indulged." The soft light is hitting his features just right. He looks like an angel in devils' clothing. And his tight grip is right back to a gentle caress. His hand reaches the small of your back and you're sucking in a shrill breath.

His kiss is soft, inexperienced. Much like the other times you had kissed. But he is treating you like glass that might break. You think it might be the first time you've seen him relax enough to be seen as a particularly gentle being. He's ditched his looming, arrogant behavior you're so used to just to show you his utmost affection. It's the first time you have seen him like this since the first time you had kissed.

But some part of you is burning. He's not your prince charming. You know exactly what he is capable of, you've seen it. You're not glass. You're not a damsel. This is a man who has watched you undress for him through your window for weeks. This is a man who has killed. And it shouldn't bring heat into your core the way it does. Perhaps it's the thrill of the danger.

You kiss him so hard that your teeth clash. It stuns him as his hand lifts from your body momentarily before finding purchase at your hips. He's inexperienced, but the desperation coming from both of you is enough to cover it up.

The warmth and weight of his tongue in your mouth is intoxicating. The little sparks of guilt and shame that flash in your stomach are quickly subdued by his nimble fingers caressing under your nightgown and up your thighs to hook in the waistband of your panties. You can't help the pathetic moan that escaped your mouth as he slowly drags the fabric down your legs.

"I wanted to do it right. Wanted to take you to that diner, buy your food, take you home, and act like I hadn't thought about fucking you into your mattress every single night."

It's almost strange to see him on his knees. He has built himself up to be godlike. You were sure he wouldn't mind you on your knees in front of him. Absolutely worshipping him. The warmth of his tongue swiping over you has your thoughts lurching, and yes, god, he is divine.

"But it would be wrong to pretend to be someone I am not. I'm not a liar."

You can't help but tangle your fingers into his beautifully unkept hair and pull. He is ravishing you. Sinking two fingers into you until you feel the heavenly curl right into the spot that makes you whimper. "Eddie-" He swallows your moans in a desperate openmouthed kiss. His fingers are working you open, you can feel tightness build in your stomach. Like a rubber band ready to snap. But it's ripped away from you as he pulls his fingers out of you and swiftly pushes you to the bed. The sounds of his belt buckle coming undone has your heart racing faster than it already was, your stomach fluttering.

He buries himself inside of you with no hesitation, no time to adjust. It hurts and his inexperience is noticeable, but the look of bliss on his face and his slight whimpers has you ready to cum before you've even started.

You're gripping onto the back of the green leather parka, reminding yourself of who you're with. Who you're letting fuck you right now. But those green eyes bring you back to all those times he'd flash a slight smile your way in the office. He'd try to hide it but you're the only person he showed fondness towards in that hell hole of a workplace. Thinking back to the night he had kissed you has tears welling up in your eyes again. He notices.

He slows his pace momentarily, letting his short thrusts turn into long drags. A gloved hand wipes tears away once again and you meet his concerned gaze.

"Does this not make you happy?"

Your hands move to cradle his face. A move that he's certainly not used to as his thrust halt for a moment in surprise. "I am happy. But what comes after this? Am I supposed to ignore you and pretend I know nothing about you? That I feel nothing for you?" He stops his movements completely now. The room has fallen silent apart from the heavy breathing between you two.

"I have to mean nothing to you. Momentarily."

You knew the answer before you asked the question, but it hurts just as bad anyway. You don't take your eyes off his. The Riddler's facade is cracking before your eyes, you can see his eyes becoming glossy. It's almost like he's turned into a completely different person. He kisses you. Deeply, but not rough. There's so much pent up feeling behind it, you could sob even harder. But you don't and he keeps kissing you as he resumes his movements.

You're not using any protection, but you're too blissed out to care. You crave that feeling of warmth. "Eddie- I-"

His hips start to stutter as he cuts you off and buries his face in your neck. " I love you- please God- just say it back to me. Tell me you love me." You hold his face in your hands guiding his gaze to meet yours again. "Edward, I love you."

That's all it takes for him to fall apart. His whimpers and cries are like music to your ears and the feeling of warmth as he releases everything he has into you is blissful. You both have to take a second to recover, foreheads pressed together. But eventually he rolls off of you carefully and tucks himself back into his pants. The silence is deafening. You said it to push him over the edge, but was it true that you loved him? The idea of falling in love with Edward was easy in your mind, in a perfect world the idea of settling down somewhere else and waking up next to him felt good. But this wasn't a perfect world. Edward killed people, powerful people, and the chance that he'd get away without paying for it was slim.

"I'm gonna turn myself in in a couple of days."

"Okay."

"You should leave Gotham. It's not going to be safe for you here. If the cops ask you're visiting a friend in Bludhaven."

His hand grips yours as he looks at you.

"I promise if I ever get out, I'll find you."

━━━━

You do as he asked of you. Got a hotel in Bludhaven and in the next couple of nights you watched the television endlessly, waiting to see his face. The night you finally did, you cried yourself to sleep, gripping the hotel sheets as you buried your face into your pillow.

But you held yourself together and did as Edward asked.

When the man in the bat suit showed up at your hotel door a week after the flood you give your best answers.

"I'm visiting a friend, but the flood has kept me in town."

"No, I didn't know him well, we just worked together."

"I mean he was a little strange, but I never thought he would murder someone."

“I would never have expected it to be him.”

"I hope he gets the help he needs."

[l-norris]

Austrian GP 2024 Recap

ITS MY HOME RACE!

This includes the sprint race, so you've got a longer one coming.

Also, I passed my exams with honours even though I prioritised the Spanish GP over studying. Priorities.

DISCLAIMER: Remember that this is just for shits and giggles, I'm not trying to actually hate on any of the drivers cuz all (most) of them are very dear to me

As always, Numbers in brackets = Laps

SPRINT RACE

- Formation lap complete

- Alex starts from the Pitlane once again

- Had to look at J*s Verstappen

- It's lights out and away we go!

- Nevermind, start was aborted for some reason.

- Extra formation lap

- What the hell happened?!

- Confusion

- Apparently it was because of Alex' car overheating?

- Nope, it was photographers.

- Alright, now for real.

- It's lights out and away we go!

- Meh start for Lando

- McLarens side by side

- Max pulls away

- Lando catches up by the end of lap 1

- DRS enabled

- Alpines both bottled their starts lol

- Lando fastest lap (3)

- Top 3 fight!

- Max goes wide literally almost every corner

- Lando was first for 5 seconds

- Oscar now second! (5)

- Get him Osc!

- Max complains (7)

- God damnit why are Lando and Osc fighting

- Carlos up in fourth (8)

- George overtakes him immediately

- Carlos in a Mercedes sandwich

- And Max pulled away a little again

- Checo made a trip into no-mans-land

- DRS train from 4th down

- Max broke the DRS window😮‍💨

- Alpines fighting each other

- The graphics are broken so the laptimes may not be accurate lol

- Lando catches up to Osc (12)

- The boys are fighting

- Danny overtakes Logan

- Osc has his elbows out

- Lando has two track limit warnings (19)

- Yaaaawn

- Just remembered that Qualifying for the actual race is today also

- Nico locks up and overtakes Fernando

- He may have accidentally pushed Fernando wide

- might as well just end the race (22)

- not like it's only one more lap lmao

- remind me to never watch sprints again

- finally it's over

- this was so painful and boring

- "Solid effort" mans didn't do anything except complain and drive

- 🙄🙄🙄

- I'm so glad this is over.

- See you for tomorrow's race!

RACE

- Guanyu starts from pitlane

- Literally everyone on Mediums except for Guanyu

- Formation lap starts

- Nothing notable as always

- Praying for good start from Lando

- Formation lap complete

- It's lights out and away we go!

- A lot of people going wide into turn 1

- Max is up and gone

- Checo pushed Oscar off the track

- I don't like this race already

- Charles damage

- Charles has to pit at the end of lap 1

- Sigh

- Lando fastest lap (3)

- Horrible day for Tifosi 3.0

- When will Charles get lapped this time?

- Oscar passes Checo :) (7)

- There go my hopes and dreams of a McLaren 1-2

- But hey we still got 62 laps to go

- Yaaaaawn

- Kev and Danny pit (11)

- Both on hards

- Nico and Fernando pit (12)

- Haas boys pulling each other along with DRS constantly

- "Kevin save tires" "No fuck that" LMAO KMAG THE MAN THAT YOU ARE

- Max complains about wheelspin (14)

- A WILLIAMS OVERTOOK A FERRARI.

- This must be a feverdream

- Charles really gave away all his luck for Monaco

- Charles pits again

- Oh brother.

- OH BROTHER.

- Pitlane window open

- GP HAD TO EXPLAIN TO MAX THE FERRARI IN FRONT OF HIM LMFAO

- Fernando dive-bombs Guanyu

- Lewis and Checo pit (22)

- Max and Lando pit (23)

- Fernando 10 second penalty

- Oscar first for now

- Literally everyone complains (It's the Austrian air)

- Lewis 5-second-penalty

- Max unsafe release mayhaps?

- Under investigation

- 6,9 second gap between Max and Lando (nice)

- Max gear problems? Stay in seventh something something idk

- "Predicted to finish in the points even without safety car"

- are you sure about that Bryan

- Checo 5-second-penalty for speeding in the pitlane

- Alpine French civil war 2.0?

- Lando fastest lap (34)

- Charles pits again... and we got a problem.

- Oh dear.

- Ferrari when I catch you Ferrari

- Just had to go and get Charlie lapped.

- Max "struggling with the tires all of a sudden" Verstappen

- Alpine French civil war still going (41)

- The boys are fighting

- Pierre won the war (for now)

- Charles is suddenly in 12th

- Maybe points are still possible after all??

- OSCAR P3

- Alex 5-second-penalty

- Max "I can't hold this much longer behind" Verstappen

- Max "Tires are fucked man" Verstappen

- Sorry this is the only interesting thing happening rn

- Lando and Max pit (52)

- Max slow stop

- We're so back

- Checo 5-second-penalty for speeding in the pitlane

- My man you're supposed to be fast on the track not in the pitlane

- This is getting exciting!!

- Both Haas terrorising Red Bulls

- Lando almost in DRS window

- Lando in DRS window!!! (54)

- FIGHT!

- AAAAAAAAH!

- Max "something is wrong with the car" Verstappen

- Max doesn't like his options

- Lando closing in

- Lando track limits

- Oh no

- Lando went wide

- My poor heart

- It's getting spicy

- OH FUCK

- CONTACT BETWEEN MAX AND LANDO (66)

- Both have a puncture🥲

- Lando retires😭

- it's so over

- BUT OSCAR WIN MAYBE?

- Virtual Safety Car (66)

- Oscar is my last hope

- Max 10-second-penalty

- Not like it changes anything

- George win confirmed

- "Yabadabadoo" George is a Seb kinnie confirmed

- Holy shit this was chaos

- I don't know how to feel about this

- At least Oscar got P2

- Honorable mention: Checo still finished behind Max after all that

- Siiiiigh

- I'm sweating as if I was sitting in a racecar myself

- feel free to add on... :)

Hoo boy... this was a day. Yep. Mhm. A day.

Lots of penalties, lots of chaos, divebombs everywhere, the holy quartet of drivers being done with their teams (Kmag, Estie bestie, Charles, Fernando), Checo still finishing behind Max after the man literally murdered Lando and had a puncture... I could keep talking, but this is already half a book, lmao. If you read until here, you're cool :)

[errantsquam]

ERRANT MERCH MANUFACTURER MASTERPOST

list of manufacturers i've tried. hopefully easier for other artists to get started in the merch game. Singapore/SEA centric. I update this whenever I feel like it.

Taobao manufacturers require some basic Chinese knowledge, but it's honestly not that bad. May set up a phrases masterpost in the future.

Use at your own risk because your experience might not be the same as mine. But this is what I've personally experienced!

[R] - Recommended. However, try at your own risk. Caveats will be mentioned

[NR] - Meh. Usable but probably not recommended

STICKERS/PRINTING

[R] Danlim - Self-service again. Less self-prep needed, the people there will give you feedback if they think your alignment is messed up (very helpful!). Supports self-collection or delivery (but delivery is on the expensive end). Supports holo which is very nice. Low MOQ.

[R] walyadfx.sg - Shopee manufacturer. Only tried them for transfer stickers. Self setup on an A5/A4/A3 sheet, but since they're transfer stickers there's no cutlines needed. Affordable and low-ish MOQ (if A5 sheets count as such lol) Came pretty fast and the quality was good

[NR] Gogoprint - Self-service is neat. However, you need to prep the files yourself, and a lot can go wrong. Some stuff to take note of is the correct PDF format (PDF X-1A), and making sure your strokes don't turn into vectors (there are some cases where this happens). High MOQ. Otherwise, more crisp than Vograce.

[NR] Vograce - Shipping isn't worth it. Printing is a little duller.

ACRYLIC CHARMS

[R] Juno Creative (Taobao) - Also on Alibaba at a slight markup. Good, affordable, better quality than Vograce. Hot stamped colors are gold/silver/red/green/blue/light blue/purple/pink. Please note that if you're doing hot stamping, DO EPOXY. The foil is not stable and will peel off otherwise. One-sided hot stamping otherwise. Use Weiyun to send larger files to them

[R] Bemick/Wenzhou Yadian (Alibaba) - My go-to for hot stamping. Supports single or double sided. Offer gold/silver/red/green/blue. Printing is generally better quality than both Juno and Vograce, but double sided prints "hover" slightly if that bothers you. Hot stamp is more iridescent than metallic. I like it though. Low MOQ but costly at lower MOQs.

[NR] Vograce - Still has the dull printing problem. Gross markup

PLUSHIES

[R] Gaopeng Toys (Alibaba) - Hesitant recommendation. They are the safe and commonly used option and have a low MOQ (as low as 1), but obviously low is expensive. Up to 3 changes allowed per sample, otherwise you pay the cost again. They handled the engineering of my complex sample pretty well. However, they have a tendency of using craft glue instead of something like a ladder stitch, which may be invisible or awful-looking depending on your product.

Have not mass produced with them yet. Treat as a cheap plush commission (assuming your local indie artist isn't open for comms).

[NR] Vograce (Manjuu) - They're probably middlemanning. They actually fucked up and sent my sample with its back upside down (yikes). Printing is dull (a common Vograce problem). Not sure who they're middlemanning for, but likely Doujin Studio (haven't tried) is my guess.

COINS

[R] Jinyin (Taobao) - Hesitant recommendation. WeChat needed for communication. Printing quality is nice, and they give advice to make your design read better. But the rep flipped out at me because I had an unusual shipping address (Taobao's warehouse).

[NR] Wenzhou Jinshi (Taobao) - WeChat needed for communication. Printing quality worse than Jinyin. Rep flipped out at me for sending the Chinese equivalent of Google Drive (Weiyun). Generally rude aside from that, no feedback given, and they get a lot of customers, so you're not important.

SPECIAL CLASPS

If yoiu're non-Chinese, you can order from here too! Do check the r/taobao subreddit for guides on setting up.

Please try to select 'Direct Shipping' instead of 'Consolidation' during payment though, otherwise you'll need to jump through some hoops with Alipay in order to pay Taobao. (Not impossible, just frustrating and scary if you think your packages are going to be held hostage)

Typical search term: 异形扣

Listing 1

Listing 2

Carbuncle Clasps

Jackpot

MANUS I'M STILL WORKING WITH

Kakubao (Taobao) - Soft (rubber?) PVC 3d charms, same as a lot of Sanrio charms. WeChat communication only. Generally the rep has been quite nice to me, but there might be revisions in more complex designs that may not be made known ahead of time. CAD is used to make the mockup. Generally recommended to familiarize yourself with the production process before doing your mockup.

Surprisingly, MOQ 1! Just pay the mold fee and they'll send you one sample for free. Unsurprisingly, the cost only becomes worth it around 100 units.

OTHER COOL LISTINGS I HAVEN'T PERSONALLY TRIED

Doujin Studio Bottle Cap Buttons (Taobao)

Wing Flapping Acrylic Charms (Taobao)

Medicine Pill Acrylics (yes, it is that weird) (Taobao)

Please view listings and reviews at your own risk! Reviews may be doctored/paid for. Things to look for are

Unusually eloquent praise of the manufacturer, mentioning stuff like rush orders, etc.

Pictures that look like they came from a factory. The factory ITSELF, not the package. Common tells are gloves/factory equipment in the back/etc that multiple reviews have.

[travellingdragon]

Temeraire - Appendices, Short Stories and Deleted Scenes or the result of my unplanned crafting weekend.

It turned out much better than I ever thought??? So far I have bound two very simple booklets and a notebook with the help of my sister, so my expectations were not really high tbh.

progress below the cut

I started this project because I was annoyed by the lack of appendices in some editions of the Temeraire books and collected (hopefully) all of them with the help of the Temeraire discord, especially Maz and stargrazing 🧡 I also found some deleted scenes and added the short stories I know of. The typesetting was fun until word decided to fuck with the formatting but that honestly wasn't much of a surprise.

The next step was to print everything out, and then print out the first few pages again, since my sister found way better fonts than I did (thanks!), so I could get close to the Temeraire woodcut covers (though, yes, @nighttimepatrons the T could be mistaken for a J ^^).

After I folded all the sections, I had to think about just how I was actually going to bind this book. Initially I was thinking about something in the style of Japenese bookbinding, though the inner margin would have probably been too small for that. There's a very good youtube channel about bookbinding (called DAS bookbinding) that I went to and though I couldn't find anything about Japanese bookbinding, I found a video about Ethiopian two-needle binding. I decided to go with that since it seemed doable and looks fancy.

The next step was to make the front and back of the book. Luckily (since I'm an incorrigible arts/crafts stuff hoarder) I still had some cardboard notebook backs which came in handy. The question that then came up was what to cover them with. The nicest paper I could find was gift wrapping paper that still made me go meh. Then, however, I remembered that I'd taken three of the encyclopedia books my parents had thrown out (they are from 1975, slightly outdated, even thought they look very fancy) and kept them (again: arts/crafts stuff hoarder). One of those was the book with maps, because I love maps.

Originally I was going to just use the Great Britain/Ireland map - with Ireland, Wales and England on the front, and Scotland and assorted isles on the back - but my sister (again, thanks!) gave me the idea to put the map upright and cover the rift with the title. Obviously that meant that I needed a new idea for the back and for that I went with a map of the world since Temeraire does travel quite a lot.

Now with all the individual parts assembled, I punched some holes and went to find some yarn. I thought I was going to go with the thin yarn you can see above but that was really way too thin, even when I used three parallel strands. Instead I used embroidery yarn I still had lying around. Since bookbinding yarn is apparently waxed, I grabbed a beeswax candle and pulled the yarn I used over it. I don't know if it actually did something helpful, but it certainly smelled good.

Ethiopian two-needle bookbinding uses - as the name says - two needles, if you have two holes and two pieces of yarn. I made four holes and so I had four needles and four pieces of yarn. I guess you could also use just one (or in my case two) pieces of yarn, but if you use two (four) differently coloured pieces of yarn, you'll get a fancy pattern at the spine!

The spine is a lot broader than the front of the book but I can live with that. If I'd made the sections larger, I might have avoided that or it would have been less noticeable at least.

This was a really lovely project that that turned out much better than I could have hoped!!! I powered through this in a weekend+ (started on Friday, finished up Monday morning) and I had a great time :3

Now to wrap this post up, here's a photo of this book with the two booklets I've bound (the short stories are also in the book) and one of it in the shelf with the other Temeraire books:

[stellerssong]

For the Fan Fic Writer Asks: 9 and/or 10

9—do you write every day? if you wrote today, share a sentence of what you’ve written!

this is actually the only piece of writing advice or technique that’s ever worked for me and my swiss-cheesed brain: somehow i managed to convince myself, in the depths of a very bad creative injury, that Increasing The Fucking Thing by a sentence, just a few words, every single day, counts on some nebulous cosmic scale as Increasing The Fucking Thing, and therefore has value. this is why my creative output is so [wiggly hand gesture] in terms of quantity, but hey, This One Weird Trick has kept me in the game for some years now when i would otherwise have quit, so we’ll call it a good thing overall. Doctors Hate Her!

here is my contribution to the cosmic scale today, in screenshot format because moving the annoying formatting from my notes app to any other rich text field is, as previously stated, annoying. and yes, i am definitely looking forward to having to reformat this entire fucking fic line-by-line when it is uploaded to ao3 (lying) (lying so hard) (was looking at another section last night and just experiencing profound despair)

10—is there a fic that got a different response than you were expecting?

something that is true in every single fandom ever is that you will publish a high-effort longfic that you poured your heart and soul into and people will be like “meh” and then you will publish an off-the-cuff gag ficlet that you barfed out in a day and a half and people will come crawling out of cracks in your walls to tell you this is the FUNNIEST and SMARTEST thing you’ve EVER written and OMG PLEASE WRITE MORE LIKE THIS and then you will be like. how did you get in my house. please get out of my house. i didn’t even go to the effort of looking up Finnish syntax and sentence construction for this fic i’m an EMBARRASSMENT. STOP CRAWLING AROUND IN MY CABINETRY

to that point, and to the original question: “we’ve got the power now, motherfuckers” has far and away received the most enthusiastic response of anything i’ve posted for Control (2019) fandom. and part of that might be because i did dash it off without taking myself overly seriously, and part of that might’ve been a fandom actually getting interested in a fic centered around a major character who up until that point largely hadn’t been utilized in fic, and idk maybe i actually did better than i thought i did in terms of mimicking the style of the in-game lore collectibles…but also y’all. please. “laterna magica” and “barren face, desert eyes” are better. like objectively. you are tearing me apart Lisa

[bylightofdawn]

Sooooo a couple of days ago when I started writing this FF7 fic I made the rather impulsive decision to purchase Final Fantasy VII The Kids Are Alright: A Turks Side Story.

Because it's for fanfiction 'research purposes' so that totally justifies my dropping 14 bucks on a book. And totally not because I got drawn in by Turks being in the title.

Look. I am AWARE that I am grown-ass adult swiftly my glorious approaching mid-life crisis era and if I want to be utterly ridiculous and purchase a book for a 25+ year old game just for fanfiction research purposes then I'm not making any excuses.

I'm aware I'm ridiculous.

Anyway, this book? Actually kinda a banger. This is prolly the best light novel translation I've ever read. It's engaging and interesting. I'm only on like page 35 so it's too early to make any real decision but it's ALREADY paying off dividends in that I already have stuff I intend on folding into this fic.

Like apparently Elena was liaisoning with the WRO who mass produce painkillers for Geostigma patients because apparently it was agonizing. (Which makes sense from what little we see in Advent Children) and that the WRO was the ones who were gonna distribute it. I'd been having Tseng play as Reeve's sort of go-between so I'm going pivot from here because of that info.

I'm going to keep writing the fic but I am definitely going to put some effort over the next couple of days to read more into the book. Only problem I'm having so far is the printing is kinda small. I'd say it's like a 10pt font and isn't times new roman but a slightly lighter serif style font which for my 40+ eyes is JUST SMALL ENOUGH to make me strain to read it.

Which....blows on soooo many levels cause fuck me am I really getting that fucking old that I will be needing large format printing books in the next decade. Also, why the hell are there no digital copies of this or On the Way to a Smile??

I did find a digital copy of the fan-translated On the Way to a Smile online. It's definitely not as smooth as the translation for this book. Like I said, this is an exceptionally well translated light novel. I've been kinda burned repeatedly in the past when it comes to light novel translations and most have been kinda....meh.

Which is kinda understandable because it's hard to convey nuance, differing cultural norms and what have you from one language to another. I might actually pick up the official copy of On the Way to a Smile if it was done by the same team as this book.

EDIT: one other thing that makes buying this book completely worthwhile is apparently Rufus Shinra has the very uncomplimentary nickname if ‘Doofus Shinra’ because he was heading the Shinra empire when everything went to shit.

And you can bet your ass I will be incorporating that into this fic somehow

I’m sure in the original Japanese it’s prolly something else but it’s hilarious in the English translation. 🤣🤣🤣

[fleshcfbhaal]

GUIDELINES.

🗡 This is essentially a DnD-based horror blog, I suppose. Be prepared for graphic descriptions of gore — though you won't find any extreme horror graphics here.

🗡 Themes that will come up: Cannibalism, murder, cults, murdercults, necrophilia, violence, toxic behavior, sadism, and other offensive stuff. There are very few things that squick me out, but if there is anything you don't want to write out, please let me know before diving into a long-term plot with me. Due to the nature of this blog, I don't tag triggers. If any of this disturbs you, it's best to avoid this blog altogether.

🗡 25+ only.

🗡 My activity on Tumblr varies.

🗡 Please don't go overboard with your formatting. For accessibility reasons, I won't follow if you use multiple spacing between words, all caps or all lowercase (for entire paragraphs).

🗡 No drama, no bigotry, no LGBTQA+ phobia, no rl politics. If my blog isn't your cup of tea, block me. In a nutshell: I expect you to act like an adult.

🗡 I ship Durgetash, but not in a wholesome way. The details of their relationship are open for discussion with any Gortash muns willing to throw in their hat!

🗡 As for general shipping: Meh. My murder man isn't really interested in sex (murder is so much more pleasurable!) and don't even get me started on what he thinks of love. His dark, rotten heart belongs to Bhaal. HOWEVER, anything is possible, and who knows? Maybe our muses will click. That said, I'm not looking to plot ships with Varkos (a few exceptions might be made at my discretion). If it happens, it happens.

🗡 Non-mutuals, non-RP blogs, memes: If you enjoy my stuff, you're welcome to follow as long as you're not reblogging my RP threads (or anything that's tagged with DNI). If you don't enjoy my stuff, HARD BLOCK. Non-mutuals, as well as non-RP blogs, are welcome to send in HC related asks. RP memes are for mutuals only, but if we're mutuals, go wild — send 12.

🗡 Not a rule per se, but me asking politely: If you follow me first, it would be great if you could to take the first step to kick things off. If I follow you first, I will try my best to do the same. I get it's not always possible, and that's totally fine. I just feel like this approach makes it easier to get interactions going. That said, if I follow you and you don't follow back within a reasonable time while you'e active, I will assume you're not looking to interact. To keep my dash clean, I might block at my own discretion.

🗡 Varkos is a fucking creep. I promise I'm not c: My moots are always welcome to send with memes and plot ideas!

[dearlawdimasimp]

a snippet of the WIP fic i'm currently working on :>

cw: canon typical violence, cussing

note: Reader is a Filipino that can speak in Bisaya/Cebuano and is of age; Sidapa is an actual Deity of Death in the Visayas Region of the Philippines(in some places also of War but that's also meh), this fic is inspired by a story about Sidapa and his supposed moon lover, Bulan. in this fic the Philippine Myths that will be mentioned is purely fictional(with a little sprinkle of infos about the actual myth) and he may be ooc since i'm still trying to get to know his character :>

note 2: 'dialogue in this format is the english translation'; Moon knight might also be ooc

Synopsis: Reader's ancestors were Warriors of the Visayan God of Death and War, Sidapa. What will happen if Reader becomes an exchange student to London while serving the native deity?

Death's Warrior and the Moon's Knight

might change this title at a later date

Shhhhickkk!

A sound of metal meeting flesh. You whipped your head to where it came from and see a crescent dagger lodged in the attacker's nape. Alarmed, you looked above you and see him. 

The London vigilante donned with white Egyptian wrappings, a flowing white cape with a hood and glowing white eyes, crescent moon shaped daggers strapped on his chest. 

You wonder how many of those daggers are on his chest.

"Ah..ang Moon Knight.." 'Ah..the Moon Knight..' Sidapa speaks behind you, also looking up at the mummified warrior. 

"Kaila ka niya??" 'You know him?'

"Nganong wala man?" 'Why not?' 

Well you could've at least told me before I started stalking him- was what you wanted to say to the Visayan deity but the Moon Knight hopping down from his ledge made you decide to dwell on that later. 

Before you could even say something Moon Knight interrupts you with a smug, "You're weclome." As he takes the dagger from the now dead man with a sickening squelch. 

Oh so that's how he is. And here you were thinking he could've been at the very least a small-talk-kinda-guy. You weren't expecting him to be a gentleman, no, not after seeing his fighting style and his signature to leave no one alive. But a small part of you wants to believe that he is.

"Didn't need your help in the first place." You retort with a huff, crossing your arms with a hardened gaze at the glowy-eyed vigilante. 

"Hm… are you new to this thing?" "No-" "Your strikes were weak and your footing is not the best, as I've observed." He interrupts before you could continue, his hands seemingly busy with cleaning his daggers. 

Oh this putang ina.

"FYI I've been in this mess for more than 3 years-" "Not a lot of years i-" At his second interruption, you decide to interrupt him too, through unsheathing your 90 cm long gold-in laid steel Kampilan and slashed his chest. Moon Knight was able to parry the attack with his crescent dagger and pushed your forehead with his unoccupied palm. 

What. the. fuck.

[vro0m]

vro0m’s rewatch - 103/301

2012 Italian GP

Disclaimer for this season. It turns out that I only have the footage of the race for a lot of the GPs (no build-up, no post-race content) so there will be way less GIFs unfortunately. I will let you know for each of these reviews if there are GIFs or not. THIS ONE HAS GIFS.

Okay. Lewis is on pole, Jenson is 2nd. Massa 3rd, Schumacher, Seb, Rosberg, Raikkonen, Kobayashi, Di Resta and Alonso is 10th.

Formation lap.

And they're racing!

OK start for Lewis, Massa immediately overtakes Jenson. Omg he's going for Lewis! But Lewis stays ahead in the first chicane. Jenson comes back at Massa, but can't overtake him. At the end of the first lap the order goes Lewis, Massa, Jenson, Schumacher, Seb, Raikkonen, Alonso, Kobayashi, Di Resta and I don't know where Senna started but he's P10. Rosberg now down in P11. Now Seb overtook Schumacher for 4th, the latter already under pressure from Alonso, yep, Alonso is ahead.

Suspension failure for JEV who slid sideways down the straight then got launched in the air by a sausage kerbs oof you can really SEE that shock going up his spine as he comes down on the replay. He's out and walking away.

10 laps in Lewis is 3.7s. ahead of Massa.

My, my, it's a boring race again. I know a lot of people talk about 2012 because the WDC was very close and all but the racing is really meh so far and we've seen most of the season already. 2011 was way more interesting in that way imho.

Anyway, Jenson overtook Massa and we're now 20 laps in. That's how little I have to tell you. Jumping 10 laps at a time.

Massa pits. Jenson is told to push. Seb pits from P3 and Alonso is also in. Seb is caught in a Ferrari sandwich now. Webber pits. Fastest lap for Rosberg. Ricciardo was overtaken by the whole sandwich in the span of a lap. Jenson pits. Not a great pit stop from McLaren yet again. Lewis pits. Great stop, 2.7s! He's out in P2. Perez is in the lead but he hasn't stopped yet. Behind him are Jenson and Massa, just like before.

Alonso and Seb are fighting for P5. Aha Seb might or might not have pushed Alonso wide on the grass. Perez is told to stay out which makes zero sense and Lewis is lapping 1s faster than him. He overtakes him, very easily, but of course they are not really racing each other. Alonso overtook Seb. Perez pits. We're 30 laps in.

Seb gets a drive-through penalty. OH. Jenson's car has stopped... Oh no...

Seb is insisting on the radio that he did not push Alonso wide and left him plenty of room which is arguable to say the least. RedBull tells Webber Seb has issues with his car. Perez overtakes Alonso for P2. Lewis has to pick up the pace. The gap is still 11s but for some reason Perez is really quick. And Seb DNFs. 5 laps to go. Webber almost spun. Perez is still gaining over Lewis but there's only 2 laps to go. Oh Webber is very slow now.

That's a double DNF for RedBull!

And it's the end of the race!

Lewis wins! Perez P2, Alonso P3. The journalist mentions the contracts talks and rumours that are going around at the moment.

Lewis thanks his team for the great job over the radio and tells them he's "so grateful for this opportunity" and that he "really appreciates it". Brundle says he means get that contract ready which is fucking hilarious when you know what actually happened.

Eh? He's not very victorious is he?

Perez in the meantime is jumping in his team's arms and they're holding a huge Swiss flag I find it so funny when I see it in the paddock (cos I'm Swiss yknow and every time it's like wtf). Ah here we go Lewis is finally celebrating with his team. Charlie is trying to get them to move to the cooling down room.

Ohhhh wow look at that

Niki Lauda bowing to Lewis on the podium.

Wow Lewis is being booed. He still says it's the best crowd and the usual things. Then he stays around while Perez answers and just leaves when it’s Alonso’s turn. He seems happy though.

[sapphicscholar]

Femslash Exchange 2021 Dear Creator Letter

Hey Femslash Exchange writer!

This is my first year participating in this particular exchange, which also means it’s my first year writing one of these letters! I hope I cover what you need to know, but I’ll make sure to leave anon asks on just in case I’ve left out something vital. But most importantly, thanks in advance for whatever you come up with! I’m so excited to read it!

Things I Love in Fic:

Complicated women! I’m sure you can tell from the pairings I’ve listed (and many/most of the pairings I write for, if you happen to have stumbled across my work at any point), I really love media that lets their characters be messy and imperfect and human

There are plenty of tropes I love if they catch your fancy (fake dating, enemies or friends to lovers, there was only one bed, etc.)

I’m good with AUs, fix-it fics, canon, canon divergence, post/pre-canon, whatever you think is going to be the story you feel best about telling! (Same with ratings, I’m good with everything from G to E)

While my students and wife might quibble with this point, I’m pretty easy-going! So long as I’m getting to spend some more time with the characters I love, I’m sure I’ll be delighted with whatever you come up with :)

Things I Don’t Want in Fic:

Non-con or dub-con sexual activity

A/B/O, BDSM universes, etc. (my favorite thing about queer narratives is how they fuck with what’s expected of someone! They often reveal the contingent nature of normative social structures, subverting expectations around things like relationship dynamics, forms of eroticism and intimacy, subject formation, etc., and showing that the expected need not dictate or circumscribe the realm of what can be imagined as possible, so I don’t love the idea of a universe that sweeps everything and everyone under new regimes of categorization)

Major character death

Womp/super heavy angst

Vomit (I know, seems weird to list, but somehow it comes up with surprising frequency, and it’s a phobia of mine!)

Things I’m ~meh~ on in Fic:

Kid fic (canonical kids are cool, though!)

Super fluffy fluff

Specific Ships (in no particular order) That I’d Love to Read:

Hacks (2020) – Ava/Deborah

Grace and Frankie (2015) – Grace/Frankie

Once Upon a Time (2011) – Regina/Emma, Regina/Maleficent

This Way Up (2019) – Charlotte/Shona

I’d be more than happy to come up with specific prompts if that would be helpful, but I also worry that sometimes prompts can end up squashing writerly creativity and the freedom to write the story that you are most excited about gifting, which is the one I’m most excited to read!

Thanks in advance! I’m so excited to read whatever you come up with!

Best, SapphicScholar

[moki-dokie]

new marvel teaser has me very :\

black widow? meh. i’ll watch it just cause i like her and marvel did her all sorts of dirty but nothing about the previews excite me at all. her getting an origin movie after shes been killed just rubs me wrong.

shang-chi i initially gave no shits about but it actually looks fairly interesting, plus it might bring back some things we’ve forgotten from the iron man movies

the eternals could not be any less appealing. doooooon’t care at all

spiderman i will watch bc spiderman is good and funny no matter what

doctor strange of COURSE i will watch this but i stg if wanda isn’t a villain in some capacity i’m gonna be pissed. please i’m begging marvel let strange kick her ass into next week and show her what a terrible fucking person she’s been, then maybe get her on the path to redemption. i want to see a showdown between them so bad.

thor 4 featuring more thor is something i’m not particularly excited about as i didn’t care for the format of ragnarok (it was fun but i’m in the small % of people who really liked the thor movies before it). that said, i fucking adore jane foster and i AM very excited to see her front and center where she deserves FINALLY.

black panther is going to be one hell of an emotional rollercoaster i’m not fully prepared for. definitely not going to be the same without chadwick, but exploring more of wakanda and more of the characters is going to be really cool.

the marvels i hate to say it but i’m just very meh about carol anymore. her character is rad but shes another that marvel didn’t do justice with. girl should have been able to stand up to thanos damn near better than anyone else but nah. they just kinda made her to be the token girl power character and it makes me sigh. plus like, ya can’t tell me that maria slowly died of cancer and apparently carol just?? wasn’t there??? i simply cannot believe that monica wouldn’t have contacted her and that carol wouldn’t have been by monica’s side until the snap aldkjga;lsdg cause otherwise that meant maria died ALONE and fuck that. i very much like the skrulls tho. i’ll probably watch this one after its done in theatres.

antman and the wasp i’ll probably watch when it’s done in theatres. those are fun movies but theres very little about them that reeeeaaalllyyy draws me in. interested the direction they’ll push cassie though.

gotg vol 3 i’m undecided on. i enjoy the gotg movies quite a bit in general. the first one i watched in theatres more than any other marvel movie lol but i’ll wait for previews/more of the plot details. with the team shaken up a bit idk if it’ll still be as fun

dear god please no more fantastic 4 movies just bring the characters in through other movies u g h

[rawr-mortgage]

Watch me praise the heck out of Jujutsu Kaisen despite starting only two nights ago and only being on EP 12 so far

Jokes aside, Jujutsu Kaisen is turning out to be one of the best anime series i've ever watched and quite possibly, one of the best animes of the coming decade???

Plot is actually interesting to theorize about and to see it play out. The main goal of our protagonist, Itadori, is to find and harvest all of Sukuna's fingers for him to consume and house the whole version of Sukuna's soul just for the Sorcerers to kill him once he finally does in order to vanquish and be rid of one of the most powerful cursed entities in existence. That's insane. That's a hella good main plot. Itadori's basically just a lamb being cared and fed for until he eventually has to be led to the slaughter. And he's aware of it and completely accepts it cuz being the only person in the world who's able to control Sukuna as his vessel, he thinks it would be selfish of him not to do it, to not willingly sacrifice himself and help other people remove this evil entity from the world at the expense of his own life.

Initially, he wanted to do good becuz he wanted to honor the fateful last words of his grandfather, who outright told him he's meant to help and save other people becuz he was gifted with outstanding physical capabilities and he should put it to good use. But then, he's told that if he's only engaging with the cursed spirit world becuz of his grandfather's wishes, he'll eventually start to resent his grandfather and blame him for all the pain he has to endure and the sacrifices he'll make being involved with dangerous and malevolent beings that'll stop at nothing to kill him in order to harbor Sukuna's powers for themselves, until he reaches the point where he's laying on his deathbed filled with regret and cursing his grandpapi to the depths of hell.

Having realized this, your boi makes his own resolve to dabble in the spirit world on his own terms and fight for defenseless people who are unaware of the inhuman dangers that lurk the earth becuz Itadori actually has a strong sense of justice and believes people get what they deserve, but no one is horrible enough to deserve suffering and death at the hands of cursed spirits.

I'm usually indifferent to shonen MCs cuz they typically follow the same format when it comes to their characterization. Your typical guy next door who's friendly, outgoing, kind of an airhead, gets flustered around girls, doesn't get much attention from the people around him, feels inferior and has a rivalry going on with the 2nd male lead, all smiles and sunshine and sickeningly nice, yada yada yada. All in all, just flat out BORING.

I'm running out of words so I'll stop here, I don't think I need to comment on the animation cuz no amount of praise or blubbering on my end can justify how beautiful and exquisite the animation is. Let's just say I now see why some AoT fans went on a rampage and claimed MAPPA was playing favorites with JJK cuz the animation on this series is sensational enough to make any other series jealous along with its fanbase (not that I'm saying the accusations were true and that I condone the hate that the studio was subjected to. like wtf, people who harass the folks that work their asses off to bring you god-level quality entertainment don't deserve anime).

Surprisingly enough, the sentiment doesn't ring true when it comes to Itadori. Even tho he shares a few generic character traits with other shonen MCs, I actually really like him and he isn't a bore to watch and follow around as the story progresses and I'm honestly just questioning what makes him different from all the other MCs and why can't every other shonen protagonist be likable and interesting enough to not turn me into a goat becuz they always make me go: meh.

I also really like the non-linear narrative JJK has going on. It actually has the potential to be quite off-putting since not a lot of animes do that sort of thing (at least I can't think of any at the top of my head), but they execute it well and do it in moderation to effectively steer it away from being too jarring. I think it's a great method for avoiding potential info dumps and filler episodes and other manga authors should deploy this technique more often cuz it's a great switch-up, storytelling-wise.

The narrative is also somewhat fast-paced, bordering on neck-break speed on some occasions, and I don't mind honestly. Don't you just hate it when the story goes full-on snail mode where every episode feels like a chore to finish and not at all like it has a 23 minute time constraint? Yea, completely throws enjoyability out the window. There hasn't been a dull moment yet in my experience, and how quickly everything plays out just encourages you to pay utmost attention and keep your eyes completely glued to the screen so to not miss any of the epicness happening before your eyes.

The soundtrack has no business being this fucking amazing. You might think I'm being nitpicky and actively looking out for things to criticize the animes that I watch on, but no, most times I don't even pay attention to all that or miss the quality of those elements entirely cuz it's too subtle of a detail for me to notice. But here, it just enhances the experience so much and compliments what's happening on-screen so well that it's hard not to take notice and feel so fucking appreciative of the awesome background music that gets you properly hyped while watching the fight scenes and lending the ambience for the milder and more emotional scenes.

Might make follow-up reviews in the future, who knows. Still haven't finished it like I said and I have a lot of thoughts on the other characters, if I feel like ranting about it, rest assured I definitely will lol.

[amphtaminedreams]

Spring/Summer & Haute Couture Week 2021: Whoops, I’ve Missed a Loooot (Part 2)

Hey to anyone reading,

I’m so sorry for the gap between the last fashion week review post and this one! Argh. I had no idea I posted it as long ago as the beginning of March but I think we can all agree that lockdown has fucked with our perceptions of time completely. I wish I could say the delay in posting was as simple as me being busy but I’ve also started to reflect on whether or not I want to carry on this format of posts for the time being; on the scale of problems, this one is wayyy down there in the very lower quartile of the first world region, but my motivation to carry on this kind of content in the form of long-winded text posts is...meh...not so much there anymore. At first I was thinking the issue was that working on these was my last priority on my daily to-do lists but as I’ve got back into writing fiction, it’s kind of occurred to me that the fact I was putting these posts on my to-do lists in the first place along with things like doing the ironing and contacting student finance speaks volumes. When I’m back from work or winding down, opening up Tumblr and coming back to this draft isn’t something that I think of as a fun stress reliever in the way drafting stories is. It doesn’t feel like I’m using my imagination or my creativity or expressing myself in any way and it’s not much of an escape from day to day life in the way that writing dialogue or exploring characters is. Maybe it’s because I’ve done quite a few of these posts now but I just tend to feel like I’m repeating myself, you know kinda like when you’re writing an essay and trying to fill up a word count; of course there are collections that I do have a lot of opinions on but by and large, sometimes it boils down to THESE CLOTHES ARE JUST FUCKING PRETTY, OKAY?! There’s only so many things you can say about a tulle skirt or an exaggerated collar before you want to strangle yourself with said tulle. I used to think iF VoGUe RuNwaY wRitErs CaN dO iT WhAT's MY exCusE until I realised that 1). Vogue Runway writers actually get paid and 2). for the most part all they do is explain the designer's intentions behind the collections verbatim without giving a critical opinion anyway.

I think a lot of the pressure I feel to justify what are in reality quite simple observations and opinions goes back to some of the feelings I explained in my first ever fashion week review where people who know more about fashion and have a formal education in the subject tend to be kind of gatekeep-y and elitist. It can never be that you appreciate different things about a collection but rather than one of you has taste and the other doesn’t and if it wasn’t obvious, the taste level assigned to you by the powers that be tend to positively correlate with the amount of money you have available to spend on a degree that has a reputation for failing to provide a steady income, which for most makes it an unrealistic avenue to pursue. I know, I know, the pressure is totally self-inflicted and wholly imagined seeing as I have under 500 followers on here and those who do interact with these posts most likely do so for the pictures but I still feel it, and given that I’m going to have enough external pressure to write essays when I return to uni in September, why on earth am I wasting time putting it on myself? When just posting photosets of my favourite looks is not only actually enjoyable for me but is also what other people WANT to see too? Nobody wants to read a self-indulgent paragraph like this when they’re here for the clothes and to be honest, for the most part I don’t want to write them anyway unless it’s something I have strong feelings about or if a collection can only be properly appreciated with analysis. I think I’ve made pretty clear which designers I’m a fan of, do you really need to hear me raving about Gucci or Zimmerman or Miu Miu or Balenciaga again? Is there gonna be anything revolutionary in yet another rant about Maria Grazia? Course not. I mean, if you are reading, you might have to witness those things one last time because I do intend to finish off this season’s review in this format for consistency purposes and because I’ve already got all the notes now but on the whole, I doubt anyone will miss my rambles.

So, with all that in mind, I think after I finish my S/S21 posts I am gonna start just uploading these posts without the written part. I mean, for one, the simplicity of doing this means I’m much less likely to procrastinate making them which in turn means I’ll be able to get them out right after the shows as a kind of summary as opposed to months later when they’re no longer as relevant. This will also give me more time to work on the writing I actually enjoy. Right now I’m going through and editing my 17 year old self’s “grown-up” take on the Pretty Little Liars blackmail murder mystery style plot line which I wrote back when I was completely and utterly obsessed with the show and bitterly disappointed by the last couple of seasons. The writing is pretty mediocre and often hugely cringey to read back now but I am still a fan of the basic plot and I’m genuinely motivated to see if I can make it something actually worth reading, and to get onto that ASAP; this feels especially important right now given that the HBO version of the series’ apparent upcoming release has sent that ever-present writer’s fear of seeing-your-same-storyline-done-better-by-somebody-else-thus-forever-relegating-your-version-to-being-the-poor-imitation-so-you-gotta-get-there-first into overdrive (or maybe that’s just me and my neuroses). Again, it’s a totally unfounded fear based on the fact that the HBO show will probs get millions of viewers whilst I will be doing little more than shouting into the void but anybody who’s used Turnitin to submit an essay that ultimately counts for little more than like 1% of your grade or degree will know that no matter how irrelevant your work is, the concept of failing a plagiarism check, be it via a computer algorithm or one random stranger on the internet’s assessment, is enough to conjure visions of the 4 horsemen of the apocalypse galloping towards you screaming “START THE WHOLE THING AGAIN” before releasing a hoarde of 2015 Chanel vs. Walmart style comparison memes.

Now, speaking of Chanel, I should probably get back into the reviewing. 

So for the last time for a little while, here’s Christian Siriano:

Siriano’s designs are a great example of work I feel guilty enjoying. I know that when it comes to quality, the high fashion community have a lot of (negative) things to say and I really can’t speak to that because quite honestly, I know very little about textile manufacturing. Solely from my own point of view though, I do like his work a lot. I wouldn’t claim for a minute that he’s a pioneer in terms of his creations but I would 100% love to wear them and I DO hugely admire his commitment to putting women of all sizes on the runway and designing pieces that don’t simply cater to straight up and down types which is more than can be said for most brands. I get that his collections are pretty formulaic, taking what has worked for the likes of Chanel and Alessandra Rich, De La Renta and Carolina Herrera, Michael Kors too (who is kind of guilty of the same thing himself), but that’s not to say his work is bad. Let’s be real, we’ve been on this planet thousands of years, we’re all taking inspiration from someone, and maybe figures like Kors and Siriano could wait a *little* longer before taking said inspiration but their aim at the end of the day is to sell clothes, not break barriers, a task which although often left to the big name brands, they too often fail at. I’m not going to lie, I’m feeling this whimsical mid-century tea party vibe, it’s elegant and it’s cutesy and My Fair Lady-esque, and you bet your arse I would be absolutely thrilled to wear one of these looks on a summer red carpet. I just can’t say no to anything tulle-maybe it’s that I was on Toddlers & Tiaras in a past life or maybe it’s that I watched too many Barbie Princess films growing up, but I like pretty much everything going on here, especially Siriano is giving us matching fedoras too. Plus, can we take a moment to praise Siriano for his COVID relief efforts? Near the beginning of the pandemic, he turned his studio into a mask manufacturing factory in order to send them out as donations, and I think that is very cool.

Then there’s Christopher Kane who once again came through with the most insanely gorgeous prints:

I mean, paint splattering is hardly a new technique but I haven’t seen it done as a print so tastefully before-it eats the Moschino biro scribble print (which apparently was copied too speaking of the tendencies of designers to “borrow” inspiration) for breakfast. It’s shit because there weren’t many looks in this collection and they weren’t really shot in a way that does them any justice but I thought I’d include the few I saved.

Comme Des Garcons is a fave of the high fashion community and one I look forward to seeing at fashion week but can never quite get behind. I appreciate the what-the-fuckery of it all with this show totally being able to pass as a run-through of some kind of nuclear waste themed scare house at one of Thorpe Park’s fright nights. I assume given that and the plastic Mickey Mouse print it’s supposed to be some kind of reference to the part late-stage capitalism has played in the hellish landscape we find ourselves in today? Or something all intellectual? In which case I made my interpretation with farrrr too much confidence. But Anyway! Who knows! I’ll leave the analysis to the fashion students, and give it one word: trippy.

Onto Dion Lee, a brand I truly do get excited to talk about because it’s rare that I don’t LOVE his work.

Without fail, Lee manages to be confidently ahead of the curve without going out of his way to announce it and his genius to everyone with flamboyant shows and exaggerated designs and extortionate prices. He is very much an underdog in the fashion world in terms of big names but you’ll be hard pressed to find anyone who doesn’t love his collections. His S/S21 collection is one of my favourites of the bunch. I love seeing something I’ve never seen before and the palm leaf breast plate is so odd but so cool and so perfectly Dion Lee at the same time; we’ve seen jungle/tropical inspired collections sooo many times *cough cough D&G cough cough* and THIS is how you make them fresh and unique. I mean, never in a million years did I think I’d get behind the resurgence of the gladiator sandal trend but Lee has me changing my mind. This is one of the very rare times you will ever see me using this meme to praise a man but:

I mean, he has Fernanda Ly modelling for him, that the man has taste goes without saying.

Now for a bit of a full circle moment, given that I did actually praise Dior’s haute couture collection in my first ever post; Maria Grazia did GOOD. Well, with haute couture at least.

She’s always pretty hamfisted with her references, there’s no denying, with that Grecian Goddess style RTW collection typifying that statement completely, but luckily she struck gold this time round; as someone who studied the Tudors for A-level history, seeing a modern take on the exaggeratedly feminine renaissance silhouettes with the baroque prints and the deep jewell tones got me super excited especially when you throw in the dreamy tarot theming and the nods to the mystical and arcane. Seeing as the Heavenly Bodies Met Gala (I know, I know, I need to move on) was some time ago now and Cersei Lannister’s *SPOILER* been crushed by a rock (could also be seen as a metaphor for the irrelevancy David Benioff and D.B Wise condemned GoT to when they aired that shitty ending tehe) and so probably won’t be getting a collection based on her costumes any time soon, this is the only fashion take on this kind of period dress I’m going to get…and you know what? I’m okay with that. Thanks Maria, I guess?

Her RTW collection wasn’t absolutely awful either, and slightly better than the past few collections at least. Put a monkey in a room with a typewriter (or show it enough similar well-received collections) and it will eventually write something that makes sense, don’t they say? I like the nomadic feel of a lot of the looks and there’s beautiful layering going on but the aura of exotic opulence unsurprisingly didn’t stick around for long and I found that there was a decline in quality in the midsection of the show that landed a lot of the outfits in either awkward mother of the bride at a beach wedding or The Only Way is Essex Ocean Beach PLT sponsored poolside party territory. The looks picked back up a bit towards the end stretch of the show but I wasn’t a fan of the Gucci style oversized glasses which were so out of place with the rest of the theming that if anything they seemed like a cheap grab at relevancy. So yeah, a middling, subpar Etro-esque collection which is better than usual for Dior I suppose.

Next, Elie Saab, whose S/S21 collection was kinda disappointing, tbh. Oh how the turns have tabled given that positive Dior review and my usual love of Saab’s collections.

I know his dresses lose some of their appeal when we can’t see them in motion but even ON the runway I can’t see myself being dazzled by any of these pieces the way I usually am. They’re lacking the level of detail and craftsmanship I associate with the brand seemingly in favour of block colours and suits and the issue is that the whole Disney Princess fantasy has always been the appeal for me because the silhouettes aren’t interesting enough on their own. They’re not ugly pieces, they’re nice, but does nice really have a place in high fashion when the pieces are so basic in both their design and presentation that the shots could pass as ripped from a catalogue? The strongest parts of the collection were when it did go down the more delicate route with the muted blue suits and the white feather trimmed dresses, the small, ornamental gold details reminding me of a very toned down nod to Schiaparelli’s hardware, but with regards to the bright coloured pieces, I can’t lie-they did look like something you could find in the M&S Per Una holiday section. Then you’ve got the weakest parts, which were just flat out ugly: sheer giraffe print, sweat band style elasticated waits, and long chiffon shirts that I hate to admit read as frumpy. There are times where I’ve not been particularly excited by an Elie Saab collection in the past, but I do think this is the first time I’ve actively disliked parts of it.

Conversely, Erdem’s S/S21 collection was super strong, and solidified the brand’s place in my mind as a dependable source of kooky maximalism, this time round giving us  Anya Taylor Joy’s Emma wardrobe on speed. You could tell me Erdem Moralıoğlu had just raided the Bridgerton set’s fitting rooms and put it on a runway and I would 100% believe you and I mean that in a positive way because to give my unpopular opinion, the clothes were the only good thing about that show. The endearingly florid details of exaggerated bows and clashing florals were still there but this time in a way that felt more subtle and self-assured, as if the calming influence of the wooded set’d had a direct hand in the designs, giving the rugged, ethereal feel to the collection I associate with brands like Brock and Simone Rocha, all whilst keeping the parts of Erdem I’m so fond of.

Is it really much of a shock that I included pretty much every look from the Etro S/S21 show?  Like, you know that Christian idea of God, like, (the voice in my head is very much taking on the dumb valley girl voice that anybody who reads this is most probably getting too) knowing our souls? I think Veronica Etro knows mine. So no, no surprise. Though there were a few unconventional touches thrown into these looks (the campier prints and nautical theming we see with the 80s beach towel print, for example, reminded me a bit of Versace) the mystical bohemian it girl that Etro designs for would still be highly satisfied. Sure, it might be a wardrobe fit for a holiday less adventurous than backpacking but if she wanted a tropical poolside holiday, this collection is the one, the paisley print chiffon mini and maxi dresses especially. I’m just gonna pretend I don’t see the monstrosity that is leggings worn as trousers-it’s a fashion rule I refuse to abandon-because they are the only stain on an otherwise expectedly gorgeous collection.

Next, an unusually reserved RTW collection from Fendi:

More in line with the wardrobe of a European fashion editor than the glamorous trophy wife (who let’s say uses that facade as a guise to ruthlessly run her husband’s whole business empire from behind the scenes because in this house we do complex female characters only), these pieces are lot “smarter” and more professional looking than Fendi’s typical offerings; where I feel Fendi usually designs for the society girl who wouldn’t mind a front page scandal, these are the kind of outfits a young member of Monaco’s royal family would wear for a positively received but business-as-usual press tour. I know, Fendi is an Italian brand, but this is more Southern France to me. We’re talking some 2nd page shots of a Kate Middleton type on a yacht on the Riviera smiling and waving as her PR team’s ideal scenario. Still, whilst fewer exaggerated silhouettes, animal prints and overtly luxurious fabrics (real leathers, silks and furs for example) mean that the drama’s a little toned down, it’s all still very expensive looking and combines the classically feminine glamour of the past and the minimalism of modernity in the artful manner that we’re used to. Maybe it’s me being a basic bitch but I always love seeing Ashley Graham on the runway too, even if brands to tend to use her as their single token plus size model.

Kim Jones’ debut haute couture collection for Fendi, however, wasn’t a very well received one. I don’t hate it personally but I can see where the criticisms are coming from. Whilst it’s closer to the version of Fendi I’ve come to expect and there were some stunning pieces which completely encapsulated that distinctive aura of luxe and glamour, there were quite a few lazy pieces which could’ve been from any designer. I also felt the collection was a bit upstaged by what seemed to be a who’s who of the modelling world; having Bella, Cara, Kate and Naomi ALL walk in one show was a bit distracting and took the focus off the clothes completely.

Giambattista Valli’s RTW collection was gorgeous as ever; the man has undeniably mastered the art of delivering classic, objective elegance, the kind of designs I feel would make you light on your feet and smell like strawberries and cream the minute you put one on. Whilst as a brand his RTW shows are rarely trendsetting, they reliably produce a plethora of unfailingly graceful and demure pieces, as appealing to your mum and your grandma as they are to young women and little girls, and this collection is another victory lap for Valli when it comes to upholding his signature tea party and artisan cupcake making and rose garden strolling and bottomless rosé brunch appropriate aesthetic. There were a lot of outfits that were bordering on overly juvenile, with structures a little too basic to justify the amount of sequins thrown on, but when it’s good, it’s so sweet that regardless of how to formula it is, I can’t help but fall in love.

Valli’s haute couture collection was stunning too and for sure a more exciting offering than the RTW. There was of course a lot of the signature tulle but it was head-turning, over the top in a way that leant far more towards the experimental than I expected. The photos themselves are 100% believable as a some kind of Vogue behind the scenes editorial shoot on the set of live action Disney princess movie (in between takes of the climactic ball scene if you wanna get specific with the vision); if you are looking for a prettier alternative to the primary colours and disruptive shapes of a Molly Goddard collection, this is the one. It’s giving the themes of excess and abundance I associate with that of the Hunger Games Capitol but through the softer lens of a Sofia Coppola movie, and being the typical cinema loving white girl I am, I’m obviously on board with that vibe.

I did SUCH a 180 on Givency’s S/S21 collection from when I first saw it to writing a review. My initial reaction was one of disappointment, I guess simply because Givenchy has given us so many bold pieces and presentations over the last few years whereas this is more low-key. After properly considering it though as I would any other brand, I came to the conclusion that I do actually really like it. It’s still got the strange, androgynous silhouettes popping up throughout and the futuristic space-age details but with a more down-to-earth, streetwear feel, albeit a very slick, glossy spin on the trends of the rabble (that’s us guys) of course before we go believing it’s achievable. On the one hand, the devil horn accents are a touch Claire’s accessories halloween range but at the same time, done with confidence they’re kind of cool and bring something new and fun to the table in line with the dark theatre of Givenchy’s last few shows.

Now for Gucci, which for the first time I have to say, if I'm attempting objectivity, is not a standout. 

Like, can I just start by saying though the format it’s presented in is cute, it’s not ideal as a way of actually showing the collection. I get that the vintage shop bin vibe is a huge part of Gucci’s brand but polaroids make it SO hard to actually see the clothes, and that’s what we’re here for right? I don’t want to give the impression that I don’t like what I see here-the clothes are gorgeous, an idyllic ode to the off-duty wardrobes of Studio 54-ers, bohemian style icons like Charlotte Rampling and young Olivia Newton-John, psychedelic rock guitarists and the inhabitants of San Fransisco’s Haight during the late 60s and early 70s, Alessandro Michele’s favourite period of reference. I can’t pretend otherwise, or act like I wouldn’t want to wear the shit out of this collection. Buut, for Gucci? It’s a little underwhelming. These are the kind of filler looks we get in a typical Gucci show to go alongside the more statement pieces, which this collection is lacking. It’s just that these are designs which usually gets people talking and these pieces don’t do that. It sucks because for most other brands this would be a stand out collection, an immersive, luscious vignette of what people tend to think of as a cultural golden era, but when you’ve had a show that involved models carrying replicas of their own decapitated heads down the runway in the last 5 years, of course something more toned down like this is gonna generate a lot of “is that it?”s.

I owe Hermes an apology. Looking back, I have disliked all their previous collections for the same reason that I now really like this one; maybe it’s in part down to the frustration of still having to whack out the winter coat on occasion in May (fuck British weather and climate change), but suddenly I really appreciate the value of some good quality, versatile outerwear. Hermes is giving us that in spades here and for that, I bow down to them. The pieces on offer are clearly well-made and genuinely practical, and through the minimalist approach manage to retain both an air of timeless sophistication whilst also being youthful and on trend. The leather tactical vest co-ord I can easily see edged up and taking centre stage on one of those insane Seoul street style slow-mo TikToks that were big a couple of months ago and there are several pieces that could tie together a grunge influenced k-style look just as well as they could exist for years on end as the wardrobe staple of a high-powered businesswoman. Designer Nadège Vanhee-Cybulski’s strengths really come through with the simpler looks and it’s the patterned pieces that drag down an otherwise flawless collection; I guess because the aesthetic is very minimalist, the patterns can’t be anything overly decorative but unfortunately this has a bit of a dowdy effect when you pair it with such modest silhouettes. Disregarding those elements of the collection though, it was super good.

It goes without saying that Iris Van Herpen’s haute couture collection was breathtaking; if the fashion community can agree on anything, it’s that this woman’s work is consistently awe-inspiring. She captures the wonder of the universe, the biological structures and kaleidoscopic colours we don’t even register, through fashion in a way that others can only imitate, to mesmerising, truly transcendent effect; I can only assume Van Herpen has mother nature whispering into her ear because how the hell else do you explain her ability to take the kind of microscopic organisms they show you images of in an outdated GCSE science powerpoint and make a dress that resembles one so stunning? Care to explain, Iris? Because if there is some kind of line of communication between the two of you can you please tell the bitch I’m over this weather and that I have cute summer outfits I’m waiting to wear so can she pack this torrential rain shit in? K, thanks xoxo

See it seems shady as fuck to go from IVH to Isabel Marant like this because we are talking 2 designers with totallyyyy different approaches to fashion; Iris Van Herpen is haute couture for starters whereas Marant is commercial, and that’s her thing, but unfair comparisons aside this collection is still a bit of a let down. This is considering I do usually really like Isabel Marant collections based on whether or not I’d wear the pieces, which seems a more appropriate barometer to use to come to a quality verdict. Whilst there were a few of the elegant bohemian pieces my mind goes to when it comes to her brand, the steps outside of that comfort zone didn’t pay off; graffiti print (can be cool if done with some subtlety which apart from a few exceptions was not the case here), cheap looking reflective fabric, and MC Hammer style dungarees, it seems to be an attempt to merge 80s trends with modern urban culture, and an attempt that at times verged on the disastrous. It’s good for a brand to experiment, of course, and appeal to a wider client base than usual, but when it’s bad the unfortunate take away is that the design team don’t have the chops to pull off straying from familiar territory; designers wouldn’t be showing at fashion week if this was truly the case because disregarding the influence of nepotism, fashion is an area you need real talent, perseverance and business smarts to excel in, and so it doesn’t do a team justice when they do fail.

J.W Anderson, on the other hand, really put his best foot forward this season and presented this work in a really cool way too which only added to the positives; whilst the way the shots were edited was funky af, it didn’t detract from the actual outfits, and if we are to see the same limitations when it comes to the F/W collections being released, this is something a lot of designers and editing teams should take note of. The idiosyncratic exaggerated shapes that we see as a recurring feature of Anderon’s collections were still on show but this time round with added femininity, billowing skirts and trailing jewellery that channel the stage looks of Stevie Nicks in a way that’s modern and functional and maybe even fit for the office if you were to work in a more creative industry with a chill boss. Could also work for a coven of witches who practice meditation by bonfires in the moonlight and burn the letters of men who wronged them in some Arizonian desert, so like I said, functional! Who doesn’t like versatility? The only thing I’m not too keen on is the shoes but they’re not so bad that it affects my opinion of the collection and they look comfy I guess.

Lastly, we’ve got to talk about Jacquemus, one of the most influential names in fashion at the moment. And yes, this time round, I’m doing it: I’m buying into the hype.

This collection is gorgeousss! I can see already that a lot of the recurring elements of the show are going to be big summer trends for this year (the cut outs and strappy details on the blouses are everywhere already) even though it isn’t hot enough to have collectively decided the time to start dressing for heat is upon us yet, and that’s always a good indicator of how successful the designer was in their vision and attempts to assess the needs and wants of fashion enthusiasts; whether I’m as big a fan of his work as everyone else seems to be, there’s no denying Simon Porte Jacquemus has always excelled at this practice if the buzz around him is anything to go by. It makes sense given the last year of us all being stuck in and suppressed that a lot of us are already romanticising the summer ahead, anticipating picnics and beach days and general Theresa May running through wheat fields type shenanigans galore, in spite of how dubious an assumption it is to make that British weather will allow for this; Porte Jacquemus has very much catered to this wishful thinking and the popularity of the whole escapist “cottage core” aesthetic, sexing it up a little bit with pieces that hug the body in ways only Mugler knows how whilst being lightweight and relaxed enough to look good with windswept, sandy hair and a little dose of sunburn. I’m talking enough to give you some cutesy freckles and rosy cheeks not PSA on the importance of suncream territory, guys, what is it with those of us on the gen Z/millennial cusp not taking sun damage seriously!? Why do I have to beg so many of my friends to wear it!? Does nobody else remember those photos they’d show you in PSHE in English primary schools of burnt people’s skin under UV lights? Or is that just me being weird and only having such a vivid memory of the images because teachers told us we had to wait until year 6 to see them due they to their “graphic” nature only for my gore-loving self to be extremely underwhelmed when we finally did get that lesson? They showed us a woman giving birth in year 4 for fuck’s sake. THAT was traumatising.

Back to the actual point anyway, with just a couple of negatives, the first of which being that the pieces are very similar to those feminine looks we saw dotted about the Jacquemus menswear collection from last year that were all over fashion Twitter. In Simon Porte Jacquemus’ defence though, it makes sense that those tones and silhouettes would be revisited in a full womenswear collection for that very reason; considering they went down so well and that lockdown gave us a bit of a half-baked summer in 2020, expanding on those elements enough for a whole new collection makes good business sense. We did get some cool additions too, mainly in the form of accessories, with the hardware details on the belts similar to those included in the Givenchy collection and the abstract hair slides being standouts for me. It was all exquisite-the shoes, the jewellery, the styling, everything 10/10. My other nitpick, and I say nitpick not because it’s not important but because it’s an issue that’s hardly restricted to Jacquemus (this casting team are far from the worst offenders, Saint Laurent I’m looking at you), is that I WISH we’d see more diversity with the models. Despite what my body dysmorphia yells at me, I am small, and yet seeing all those fucking minuscule waists made me die a little inside; it’s crazy to me that in 2020 the lack of variety in body types on the runway is still such a problem.

I must have said this a million times but I don’t want to end on a negative note so let me reiterate: this collection was STUN. NING. Plus there were some others I’ve talked about in this post that I’m sure will make it into my top 20 in the final part, Jacquemus, Dion Lee and Etro for sure; we even got some gorgeous pieces from Maria Grazia which I thought was a sentence I’d never type out. Have I said enough to not leave a bad taste in the mouth of anyone who read to the end of this post? I hope so, lol! TBH, it’s impressive given everything that’s going on that the majority of designers did roll out collections in September as usual so serious respect to them and their design teams for that.

In the next post, I’ll fingers crossed be able to include everything from Kim Shui (exciting!) through to at least Off-White (actually pretty good this time?!) and make this whole thing a 4 parter before getting straight on top of the photo posts I’m thinking about doing for the time being for the F/W21 shows. So as usual, if you did read to the end thank you so much and I respect the perseverance you must have to get through all my rambling, lmao. Hope everyone is well and coping okay and again, my inbox is always open for any post suggestions, constructive criticism, or just a chat for anyone who needs a listening ear.

Big love and thank you again!

Lauren x

[babaleshy]

I’m back!

Like.. Back-back, I guess. I need a damn outlet.

This is motorclit, btw, considering some of you who may be following me might have followed me on my new blog here when I crawled back wanting an outlet. And I’m back (again) but I think back-back, now?

Anyway, lots have changed, such as finding out I’m on the spectrum, deciding to take up Russian (on my own; I can’t afford to go back to school), getting into solarpunk, figuring out I’m demiwoman and greysexual, and some other stuff.

I’m way more active on twitter but that might taper off a bit because when I wanna really rant, the character limit on tweets fucks with me and nobody really cares because algorithm anyways, so... *shrug*

I tried starting up a wordpress but nobody’s gonna give a shit. So.. meh. I like the layout and format of how to post shit here anyways.

What sucks is it doesn’t seem like I can uh... bold my shit or whatever.

[queencryo]

hm. i should start over on that tumblr post saver. now that i actually know [literally anything at all] about webdev and web apis and shit, i bet i could do a WAY better job than my previous 'reblog 200 posts to another blog' attempt, because franlly that script sucks dick, is worthless, and i never even bothered to set it up such tjat it ran continuously (had IDEAS to run it off an rpi, but never even got ariund to figuring THAT out. jeez...)

id defijitely also want to get/make a viewer, too. because, frankly, exporting a shitton of xml or json or whatever the fuck? not even helpful at all. lame!

though, hm. i have... no idea, how to make working webpages (cuz if u cant get stuff of a certain tag whassa point)

maybe a self-contained exe that runs both the server and the client? that might not be a terrible idea

viewer levels:

literally just xml

generate a basic html file that contains all da posts

make it have css too (how?) (i dontnknow right now fuck off)

allow tag filtering based on runtime arguments (postviewer.exe -tags 'honk, fuck, kill' -reblogs false)

allow tag fiktering from within the viewer, by clicking on tags. like tumblr does jow, kinda.

search up tags, too.

would also wnana be able to capture pictures. other media forms would be good, but pictures are franjly mandatory. (i dont feel thatd be super hard tbh. download image, rename it according to the post id, have that be accessible in the folder. append a cointer for multiple images in a post)

multiple post types is a potential worry. how are dialogues handled? has the way tumblr stores / encodes posts changed since the strt (surely, right)? how are reblogs hanxled, in the code?

would probably be helpful to find or make a test blog. fkr experimentation, and testing. on a blog.

i like this idea, i feel ike its smth i could actually do AND that is actually useful. maybe i could start over christmas break. plus, if i getthis working good and reliably, maybe i could let other ppl use it, too^_^ (for showing off to irl ppl, include one of the sandsverse blogs as an example. nice and weird, but so weird it works imo? plus iirc a nice variety of post types. not so good with taghing though iirc. check that later, maybe one is betterthan the other ones.) (yeah just went and checked sandsvendor. no damn tags. cmon seymour.)

anyway. might be a good idea to slot all the posts into a database? could sort by notes and shit, that way... but it also kinda implies rails (cuz thats tje only database-oriented stuff i interact with...)

doing thus in rails feels kind of stupid. plus, load time on start? should NOT be long, prederably under thirty seconds imo. idk hlw achievavle that is with rails or an sql darabase in general, since i know my blog for example has like 30000 posts or more if u include everything. which wasnt the initial plan, but... meh.

hm. okay. so.

initial plan: save all posts on a tumblr blog with one/more of a given set of tags. eg, the set [blog, saved, later] would catch posts woth tags [blog, i hate you, five dogs] and [later, saved, i love this so much] but not [aaaaa, you you you you, two] or []. Images (and possibly other media) attached to such posts are to be saved as wrll, in a format in which they can be retrieved at time of viewing. This process must be enactable with minimal user input, beyond choosing the tags and the blog url. Posts must be saved in a non-volatile format, ie they must be retrievable not just by this program. (bare minimum)

A viewer should be included, which is capable of rendering the posts in a manner that is human-readable. Posts must have all text, tags, timestamps, and images (possibly other media) as when they were on tungle.net.

Optionally, posts ij the viewer should be sortable and filterable. Users should be able to filter by tags (and possibly also timestamps, and whether the backed-up blog is the OP of a post). Users should be able to sort by timestamp both ascending and descending (if u need to sort by anything else well nyeeeeh)

okay! so. i THINK that really the main thing that rails kr another web framework would be needed for is tgat last point, and maybe the formating. i have no idea how hard/easy adding css formatring to straight html is (probably hard lol<_<)

hmmmmmm. okay. ill be real w u here. doing this in rails feels... dumb? Im not here to build a web app.

then again, filtering by tags, sorting? those are practically what databases were MADE to do. so if i want those (and, franjly, i do!), then it may be wise to resign myself to needing to use something of that nature.

maybe i could look into what those homestuck viewer people did? thats basically the platonic ideal of what i want this to be: a familiarish interface used to sift through the wreckage of the past.

hm. well, if any of yall have any ideas, feel free to chime in! hopefulky i end up actually doing this, so any tips would be super appreciated! (esp on how to handle the iewer part <_< thas the psrt that turns this from a script to a real projext imo)