#the nightmare of the social media algorithm

[valyrfia]

You know what i have kind of being afraid lately that charles and max becomes a bit more distant and cold, because of how much lestappen started to get talked. Because before it was just fans, but now even f1 media uses the lestappen thing a lot

Like that video where they asked max "it seems like you explain things to max a lot"

The RPF curse unfortunately, the more popular the thing becomes, the more it spreads to people who aren't as strict with boundaries about it as they should be (because it gets them engagement!) and the more likely it becomes that someone who should NOT know about the RPF finds out about it.

The comments underneath Max's latest instagram post left me feeling uneasy, to be honest. Far too much "omg Lestappen!" or something along those lines making jokes that I would almost believe were lifted straight from the tag on tumblr. It's disconcerting. All I can do is warn about how I've seen other popular RPF go south in my time which is that people either a. end up trying to play into that content so much that it gets noticed by the people involved or b. conspiracy theorist begin to be incredibly invasive in an attempt to 'prove' that they are into each other/the ship is real etc. etc.

The issue isn't tumblr, it's fandom culture which historically was concentrated on tumblr going mainstream and people who I'm sure ten years ago would've bullied our ilk on whatever playground suddenly using fandom terminology or speaking openly about ao3 and shipping or using ship names in spaces where it's not appropriate. I've seen the complaint with Lestappen that it's full of 'ex-larries trying to do the same shit' when in my experience, it couldn't really be further from the truth. All the people who watched Larry happen either from within the fandom or as an onlooker (as I was) know full well how south RPF can go if you don't put in place strong internal and external boundaries. As a result, we may have some ex-larries or similar among us on tumblr, but in my experience the 'trauma' (for lack of a better word) and hindsight enables us to set down boundaries quite well and keep the RPF on tumblr and ao3. The people who are pushing romantic Lestappen past boundaries are those who have NOT witnessed something like Larry in real time, and indeed may not have had any real fandom experience in their more formative years and as a result have no idea how to interact with fandom etiquette or fandom culture. This applies to fans, but also to social media and media teams as well, who come across fandom terminology, see that it gets interaction, and choose to use it. It is a massive problem, and I'm so afraid to say that at the rate we're going at it's a matter of when Max and Charles discover what we mean by Lestappen, not it.

[scrambleseggy]

Was watching a youtube vid and I’m completely paraphrasing here but some I think philosopher guy in the 90’s was like “oh yeah were gonna have a lot of world peace through the growth of the internet because it’s going to solve a lot religious and faith based arguments by making people a lot more interested in science (and also be more logical and empathetic bc human connectivity sorta thing.”) And it’s like sad how like completely wrong he is lol. And the youtuber was like “yeah the internet is basically mostly a cult now so no” wnbdsbbf brilliant.

[formulatrash]

sorry to like, keep going on about this but as a (former?) media professional: seeing so many comments on @wearewatcher's video saying "I would fire people so I didn't have to charge for content" and accusing WATCHER of being capitalist about it is actually insane.

you used to have to pay for content. you had to pay like £16 to watch one whole movie on DVD. this is because it cost money to make and people were supposed to be paid for it. remember the writers' strike because streaming now only benefits executives with no equanimous income distribution model for the people who create the stuff you love?

you are meant to root for the independent creators. you are not meant to want all content to be beholden to an algorithmic nightmare that ransoms what creators can make or monetise for its own arbitrary censorship. you are not meant to root for a platform that works to silence and limit people under oppressive regimes. you are not meant to demand that you get content only on something that platforms and promotes right wing prejudice.

employing people is good!!!!!!! you are meant to want people to be fairly paid for their work even and especially when that work goes into creating things you love and get enrichment from

yes you are also meant to share your subscription with your friends. OUR login details. THAT'S fucking socialism.

[vxnitra]

This fandom is out of control and it’s time to reevaluate where we go from here.

Over the past week it’s been a nightmare in the fandom with the stalking being brought to light but to be honest it’s been going on a lot longer than that with threats and hate towards them and fans to the point people are leaving. If we want to keep this fandom going we’re going to have to change as a community otherwise there won’t be any fandom.

So what can we do to make this a better space for us and the triplets?

1. Ignoring negativity- people can have opinions obviously but where do we get going back and forth arguing, if you don’t like what someone has said on your post or someone else’s you can delete or block the person, simple.

2. Stop entertaining drama- people will do shitty things and make up lies and drama but like point one ignore and block, cut off the attention they are seeking and you’ll feel better for it truly.

3. Learn to love yourself- now this one may seem confusing in here but just because someone may get more notice than you by other fans or the triplets doesn’t mean you are less than, sometimes its just the algorithm and we shouldn’t go sending hate to others for it. If it is deeply affecting you please take a break or block these accounts for your own mental health.

4. Lifting and supporting one another- we have many amazing, talented people in this fandom, don’t be afraid to put yourself out there and show your love for people as it can brighten someone’s day and you never know what friends you can make from it.

5. Excepting the fact the triplets need a break at times- since starting they have hardly taken breaks in their career so maybe that’s why people jump to conclusions when they take a break thinking they’re quitting (they’re not) unless they say otherwise. Im going to say this with love do not make them your life and make them an extension of your life because sitting waiting there for them to post and they don’t will hurt you in the long run.

6. Generalisation - we need to stop generalising fans, for example thinking all older fans are creeps because some are or calling younger fans annoying, have you met all younger fans to decide that? Get to know people before you judge rather than making assumptions.

7. Blaming- can we stop blaming and pointing fingers when things don’t go our way “ it’s the stalkers fault we don’t have a video I hope they’re happy”. I know some of these are jokes but some are serious but how do we know this? Maybe they’ve decided to change their filming schedule and if so it doesn’t matter we move on with our lives or go back and watch another video.

8. Not making everything public- I’m going to use the stalking incident as an example, the exposing could of been handled a lot differently like reaching out privately to a mutual of theirs instead of making everyone known of it to be spread around. We know they are private people as it is so I assume they didn’t want to open social media with the fandom like a dumpster fire and thousands upon thousands of notifications about it. I think stalkings wrong but we need to work on how we compose ourselves, we can do things calmly and let them handle it. Also sometimes bringing these things public can do more harm than good for them and it’s best to think about their safety.

Theres definitely a lot more points but I’ve rambled on long enough just take this post with a grain of salt if you don’t agree that’s fine just block me or ignore it. If you agree I hope we can apply them moving forward as this fandom can be amazing, a safe space for us to express ourselves and support the triplets together as a community.

Thank you for reading🤍

- I know my words mean nothing and I probably wasted my time writing this but I needed to get it off my chest.

[ao3cassandraic]

Flooding the zone

Like many in the US right now, I'm having trouble holding my shit together. It's a day-by-day, night-by-nightmare thing. I do not read mainstream news. I have what social media I have left (including this hellsite) filtered to hell and back, because it doesn't take much to send me into a spiral.

So if that's you too right now, I feel you, and I swear I'm not writing this post to make it worse.

I'm writing it to ask us to think about what we're saying and doing and how we're spending our energy.

I'm not a political scientist, but I read a few. I'm not a labor theorist, but I am a union member and officer. Our situation in the US rhymes with other situations, geographically and historically, and one thing that's crystal clear is there are ways to stop this shit and it takes numbers and actions and often time.

The numbers are maybe smaller than you think? That one surprised me. Active resistance from maybe 5% of the population has stopped coups cold.

The rub is, best I can tell, that it's hard to say exactly which actions are gonna turn the tide, never mind when -- this shit's complicated and contextual and frequently opportunistic (as with President Yoon's faceplant in South Korea) such that even hindsight gets a bit murky.

So it seems to me that what it makes sense to do is flood the zone, as they say in American football, and keep flooding it. And yeah, that's a Steve Bannonism too, but what our enemies lack in ethics and care they make up for in cold hard strategy, so why not steal it from them?

(Part of my thinking is George Lakoff, too. Smart dude. Decent one, too. Check him out.)

Flood the zone with truth. Flood the zone with defiance -- it's our country too! Flood the zone with hope.

And not just once, but many times, because we can never know in advance the one time that'll put us over the top. Also because like almost any serious endeavor, resistance takes practice. As we practice, we get habituated to the practice and we get stronger and better at the practice!

I can attest to this myself. I spent most of my adult life pretty lousy at civic engagement (never mind resistance), if I'm honest. I voted routinely, but that was about it. I started switching it up in 2011 (I'm a Sconnie and Scott Walker sure did happen), though -- protests, donations, working the polls, union membership and then service, contacting my legislators, more protests, campaign work, some other stuff.

And now a lot of the above list is plain old routine, for me? It's ordinary as weather. It's just part of how I live my life. I bet civic engagement, including in the form of resistance, can become that way for you, too.

I believe a fair few of us can step onto the same road I've been on if we redirect some of our existing efforts -- because doomscrolling is an effort, venting is an effort, doomsaying and amplifying doomsayers is an effort. Let me gently suggest:

Instead of doomscrolling or ruminating: meditation, spiritual or religious practice if you have one, exercise if it's available to you, reading books or fanfic, doing puzzles or brainteasers (I have developed such a Squaredle habit).

If you can't scratch the doomscroll itch unless you're looking at something political, try Mariame Kaba or Rebecca Solnit or even Ezra Klein. If the problem is the doomscroll finding you, filters and blocks and getting away from algorithm-personalized platforms can likely help, and that last is a good idea all by itself.

Instead of venting to social media or into the void: vent at elected officials! You don't have to start with phone calls, or do them at all (I rarely do) -- remember, we're flooding the zone, and the zone's pretty big. Email or Resistbot or postcards are totally fine. More fun in groups -- postcard with friends!

If you can, try to angle your conversational contributions online and off-, including what you reblog/retoot/boost, away from venting and toward action and hope. This doesn't have to be because you're actually feeling hope -- it absolutely can be (and for me often is) a conscious strategy to develop fellow travelers and discipline my own mind and hands.

Instead of doomsaying, express hope and love and solidarity. Again, you don't always have to feel it -- it's a conscious organizing strategy, get me? If it helps you feel more hope and more solidarity yourself, and it may (especially as others respond to it), that's a grateful bonus.

Or consider a swear-jar strategy. Catch yourself doomsaying? Make a donation or email a legislator or whatever -- just decide on a useful action you'll take when you slip up, and hold yourself to it. Every time.

It's not hard to find people who say that all the above is performative, it's not action, it's not effective, ka-blah-ka-blah-ka-blah. I say that we damned well don't know that and that lots of small efforts from lots of people is totally how zones get flooded.

I also say that everyone starts somewhere, and that the zone ain't gonna flood itself.

Redirect even a little effort to flood the zone with me, please? Thank you. And my love to you and to all of us in these times.

[dasha-aibo]

The Tik-Tok situation is a giant multi-tiered complicated sandwich and people are, once again, boiling it down to their own favorite points.

Yeah, blanket bans of popular social media apps are bad, this is a free speech and a free market violation

But also Tok Tik collected some stupid amount of data for unclear purposes and had all kinds of nasty shadow algorithms

But also other social media sites do that too with little pushback

But also TikTok was very clearly deep under CCP's control

But also it's not like Musk is not basically a government official now

But also we live in a complicated nightmare world with no good solutions

[dostoyevsky-official]

Doomscrolling Is Slowly Eroding Your Mental Health June 2020

For years people have questioned the net benefits of platforms like Twitter and Facebook, and while some studies have found social media, when used responsibly, can have positive effects on mental health, it can also lead to anxiety and depression. Or, at the bare minimum, FOMO. And that’s just the result of looking at too many brunch photos or links to celebrity gossip. Add in a global pandemic and civil unrest—and the possibility that social media networks are incentivized to push trending topics into your feeds—and the problem intensifies. [...] The doom and gloom isn’t all the media’s fault, though. Mesfin Bekalu, a research scientist at the Lee Kum Sheung Center for Health and Happiness at Harvard’s T. H. Chan School of Public Health, notes that while a lot of the news is bad, “as humans we have a ‘natural’ tendency to pay more attention to negative news.” This, along with social media algorithms, makes doomscrolling—and its impacts—almost inevitable. “Since the 1970s, we know of the ‘mean world syndrome’—the belief that the world is a more dangerous place to live in than it actually is—as a result of long-term exposure to violence-related content on television,” Bekalu says. “So, doomscrolling can lead to the same long-term effects on mental health unless we mount interventions that address users’ behaviors and guide the design of social media platforms in ways that improve mental health and well-being.” The effects of doomscrolling also vary depending on who’s doing it. [...] Many activists didn’t participate in doomscrolling simply because, they said, “I can’t see myself being killed over and over again in this tiny square on my phone.”

It’s Time to Log Off Nov 2023

Scrolling through social media can feel like a nightmare these days. You’re reading about the horrors of the Israel-Hamas war, and then you’re reading about the horrors of the war between Ukraine and Russia. You’re learning about the latest devastating climate news. Democracy is under threat in America. It can feel like everything is falling apart. This, of course, can have a significant effect on your mental health. You start to feel overwhelmed. [...] Matthew Price, a professor of psychological science at the University of Vermont, says that stress is cumulative. [...] Price says ingesting a lot of negative news can cause anxiety and depression, at least for some period of time, but it’s especially likely to “exacerbate” anxiety, depression, and PTSD in people who have a history of experiencing those conditions. He says that people often doomscroll because there’s something bad going on and they want to find a way to fix the problem they’re reading about. “When we’re doomscrolling, we’re kind of looking for the resolution to the issue. Read some more posts. Read some more articles. If I get more information, then maybe I’ll understand the problem,” Price says, describing the doomscrolling cycle. [...] “It’s not about ‘this is a bad thing and this is a good thing.’ It’s about how you engage with it and how it fits in with the rest of what’s going on in your life,” Teachman [a professor of psychology at the University of Virginia] says. “How are you living the rest of your life, and what are the impacts on that?” [...] Price says that acting locally on issues you’re concerned about can help you maintain your mental health because otherwise things can feel too far away and too difficult to solve. Maybe you can’t end a war, but perhaps you can help some people in your community or get your community to do something that helps a bigger problem.

i find the defiance that it's not phones (a shorthand for everything they provide access to) eroding our children's attention spans puzzling. bad news isn't new, the press has always veered towards the sensational, people have always overfocused on the negative. but the technology of access and dissemination is brand new. this is a summary of a few research studies on doomscrolling and the emotional, psychological effects it has on adults. surely everyone reading this has experienced some it in some form. you don't think worse things are happening to undeveloped brains?

[breezeinmonochromenight]

i have no idea if this has ever circled into your algorithm for any social media but do you know that there is this one gamer who bulldozes through difficult levels in games while chanting "gongaga" repeatedly? like platforms are changing, steel spikes are swinging from the ceiling and man evades everything with gongaga? gon-ga-gaaaa gongaga! and it's hilarious

thought you'd find it funny too haha

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A post shared by HunterHiroo(Vtuber) (@hunterhiroo)

This is Genesis’ waking nightmare.

[troydooly]

I have the privilege to mentor some young guys almost every day. This week, one of them found out that his ex-wife had remarried. It might not seem like a big deal to some, but he’s only 25. Another guy I know is 35 and has already been married three times.

While chatting, he looked at me and said, “It’s not like when you were young, Troy.” I reminded him that I got married at 18, separated by 21, and was divorced by 22. Suddenly, a single dad with two boys was thinking, ‘No girl will ever want us!’

I have a couple of young women in my life who feel the same way. One is in her early 30s and divorced, and the other is in her 40s. Both want to find lasting, meaningful love.

Interestingly, they all feel like life isn’t what it used to be. Why is that? What’s really changed?

I think we’re dealing with two major things these days:

1. Comparison: With social media everywhere, we constantly compare ourselves to others based on their perfect online lives. People put on a show, hiding their struggles and insecurities behind this ideal image that looks flawless.

2. Self-indulgence: Instead of taking a hard look at why we’re feeling what we feel, we let algorithms feed us what we want to hear, which just keeps us feeling unsatisfied.

For example, we scroll through our feeds and see all these “happy, successful” images of others, making us crave that same lifestyle. Then we start searching for things we think will create a life like theirs.

Before we know it, those algorithms are hitting us with more articles and images we want. At first, we get a kick from it, but then reality hits hard. Our excitement fades, and we might end up feeling worse than we did before. It’s like the body keeps score!

Next thing you know, we’re saying stuff like, “Why can’t you be like him?” or “You used to take care of yourself, like her.” Thoughts like, “Why can’t you have grades like your siblings or classmates?” pop up too.

Yet, we look in the mirror and the self-talk gets brutal: “I’m fat, I’m skinny, my body doesn’t look right, I don’t look the same as the guy/girl in the picture.

And sometimes it has nothing to do with our bodies. Sometimes it how other’s lives look so peaceful and calm, while ours feels like a Nightmere on Elm street.

These feelings of NOT Being Good Enough were less common in earlier generations. So we end up stuck in a fantasy that feels more like a nightmare than an adventure.

As I listened to these young adults talk about wanting the kind of relationship I have, I asked them to describe what they think my relationship looks like.

I won’t spill the beans on their perceptions, but I’ll throw out three questions for you to consider:

1. What three words define a healthy relationship for you?

2. Are you living by those three words in your current relationship?

3. Do you make excuses for people in your life when they keep crossing those important boundaries, especially when it's you?

If you want the kind of love you’re dreaming about, it all starts with you! You’ve got to figure out what I’ve learned and begin working on your PIES:

- Physical Self

- Intellectual Self

- Emotional Self

- Spiritual Self

You can’t do this by yourself! We weren’t made to go solo, scrolling through feeds, binge-watching videos, or dreaming about “what could have been.”

More bluntly, you weren’t meant to build relationships based on the false security of an OnlyFans world—feeling so hurt and lonely that you end up isolating yourself while pretending to be wanted and loved in a completely transactional way. On both ends!

[meret118]

My algorithm knew I was pregnant the day I took a positive test – and the trauma content followed

This behaviour — ‘when you unconsciously scroll more slowly over certain posts’ — is known in the search engine optimisation (SEO) world as ‘dwell time’. But crude metrics on people’s dwell time risk glossing over some uncomfortable truths: by lingering, people are not necessarily liking the content they are seeing. In the early stages of my pregnancy, my Instagram and TikTok accounts knew I was only sharing or hitting the ‘like’ button on wholesome content about becoming a mother. The platforms had more than enough information to avoid torturing me; they knew full well what I wanted to see and when I wanted to see it. But they chose to ignore the data they had. They chose to be cruel.

This is not a new phenomenon. As Washington Post writer and then-new dad Geoffrey A. Fowler similarly described, within weeks of posting pictures of his new baby to Instagram, his Explore Page began showing him ‘babies with severe and uncommon health conditions, preying on my new-parent vulnerability to the suffering of children. My baby album was becoming a nightmare machine’. He, too, had lingered. And while I don’t believe social media use can ever be risk-free, I have to ask: isn’t there a danger in recommending content to people who are not engaging with it beyond dwell time?

. . .

What I’ll be taking away from this experience is a healthy reminder that social media platforms do not reflect reality. We typically talk about the concept of ‘social media versus reality’ in relation to the content people share, which can depict enviable lifestyles. But we must also apply this notion to the mechanics of the platforms we use. Through their recommendation algorithms, social media platforms take elements of the truth but then distort and reflect them back to us, kind of like a funhouse mirror rather than a normal one. It doesn’t matter so much when platforms do this with trivial subjects, but this distortion matters when it comes to our health, our bodies, and with the things that make us most vulnerable.

www.glamourmagazine.co.uk/article/pregnant-algorithms

--------

So glad I never joined facebook etc.

[mariacallous]

The end of TikTok has begun. As the dust settles from a week of shockingly fast legislative action by the US Congress, it’s clear that TikTok next year will look much different from the TikTok we’re using today.

When President Joe Biden signed a $95 billion dollar foreign aid package on Wednesday, it brought to life a nightmare that has haunted TikTok for more than four years. If TikTok’s Chinese owner, ByteDance, refuses to divest its stakes in the company, the United States will ban the app nationwide. The signing started the clock, giving TikTok 270 days to find a new owner. (As The Washington Post’s Cristiano Lima-Strong noted, TikTok’s time will run out the day before Inauguration Day 2025.)

There are a few ways this could all shake out. An American company or private equity fund could buy TikTok and its powerful recommendation algorithm. Or, a buyer might have to accept just the bones of the platform without that algorithmic muscle; The Information reported on Thursday that ByteDance has already started gaming out what a sale without the algorithm would look like. Or, perhaps no buyer can be found and TikTok goes poof.

Unless TikTok or a horde of its users were to somehow win a lawsuit challenging the law signed this week—a lawsuit the company has already said it plans to file—all the potential outcomes lead to an app that is dramatically different.

If a US tech company were to, miraculously, buy out the app and algorithm from ByteDance, it’ll likely integrate the app into its own products and services. But I doubt we’ll ever see a “TikTok by Meta.” Meta and other tech giants have come under intense antitrust scrutiny in recent years. If any company with a big social platform were to gobble up one of its top competitors, that would set off alarms at the Department of Justice or Federal Trade Commission.

Microsoft has suggested that it has an interest in buying TikTok, and it might be one of the app’s only viable choices for a buyer. Microsoft’s biggest subsidiary otherwise is, well, LinkedIn—and can we even call LinkedIn a TikTok rival with a straight face?

Separately, if, say, a private equity firm like Blackstone were to purchase TikTok without its much-envied algorithm, rebuilding the heart of the app could be difficult. A company without a deep bench of algorithmic wizards on hand likely wouldn’t have the expertise to quickly reengineer a feed-based social media platform from scratch. If they tried, I doubt the results would be pretty.

And if there’s no new owner? Well, I guess we’re left with YouTube Shorts and Instagram Reels. TikTok’s popularity in the US forced Google and Meta to invest in vertical video, but those platforms mostly cater to the younger “Skibidi Toilet” generation. They wouldn’t easily fill a TikTok-shaped gap on the US internet.

Still, the law passed this week may not stand for much longer. In a statement calling it unconstitutional, TikTok seemed confident that the law could be overturned. “We believe the facts and the law are clearly on our side, and we will ultimately prevail,” a TikTok spokesperson said on Wednesday. The company used a similar argument last year to win an injunction blocking a ban passed in Montana.

Regardless of how this lawsuit plays out, TikTok will be different. The question is just what kind of “different” that will be.

[grimtoucher]

Using any other social media after using nothing but Tumblr for 10 years has been incredibly detrimental to my health because literally every time I do I feel like I'm at a fucking rodeo trying to wrangle the fucking bull that is my recommendation algorithms. I feel like I'm not allowed to enjoy using the platform because I have to focus so fucking hard on making sure my extremely careful curation isn't being undone by looking at a video for more than a couple of miliseconds. I'm not allowed to leave likes on posts that don't pertain exclusively to my interests because the algorithm takes any sort of engagement as me requesting to see more of that shit. It's a nightmare

[creetch]

Admittedly despite Tumblr being my favourite social media site in the world for the fact it isn't an algorithm based hellscape nightmare I've been building a accounts on twitter because the last year more than any has made me think Tumblr is really on borrowed time more than normal :( (the already skeleton staff being cut AGAIN makes me very nervous) so I'm gonna be as active on here as I was before but I also have two twitter profiles one for HSR and one for my Bandom related interests so plz follow me on these in case Tumblr gets thrown into the firey pit :((((

Also also on the first account I posted about Vessel from Sleep Token noticing me at the barrier and it made me scream so there's also that if you wanna see

[whatthehelloh]

Consider, for a moment, that this AI-generated video of a bizarre creature turning into a spider, turning into a nightmare giraffe inside of a busy mall has been viewed 362 million times. That means this short reel has been viewed more times than every single article 404 Media has ever published, combined and multiplied tens of times. 

[...]

Any of these Reels could have been and probably was made in a matter of seconds or minutes. Many of the accounts that post them post multiple times per day. There are thousands of these types of accounts posting thousands of these types of Reels and images across every social media platform. Large parts of the SEO industry have pivoted entirely to AI-generated content, as has some of the internet advertising industry. They are using generative AI to brute force the internet, and it is working.

Click article above to read more..

[thegreatimpersonator]

hey sarah! how are you doing? you always let us ramble in your inbox so if you wanna rant abt something i am imploring you to do so in response to this! take care 🖤

as thanks lovely this is so sweet ❤️

i’m okay, i’m just kinda realizing i need to really start having better habits and use social media less, especially tiktok. that damn clock app is just a really draining app for me recently- everyone’s so bitter and every fandom is so weird and immature now. there’s discourse and outrage about everything and i hate that i’m subjected to seeing it. like over the past 2 days ive seen 3 different discourses by sabrina carpenter stans that have pissed me off lol. all of it is so stupid and none of it matters. i wish my algorithm was just funny little videos but instead its a pop culture nightmare. i need to stop looking at comments, stop interacting with the posts i don’t want on my algorithm and just use it les in general. i posted about this a few days earlier, but pop culture just isn’t a nice place to escape anymore. and i’ve also been having the same issue here, and it’s my fault completely. people come to me to talk about pop culture and i’m entertaining it. and tbh, i don’t want to change that but i think the combination of both tiktok and here is just too much. i’ve also been deleting a lot of taylor-related asks bc i feel like this is becoming a taylor blog again and it it is in fact not, im not even a fan like im talking about her too much (except ootd anon ily you’re not the problem, that’s more about discussing the clothes rather than taylor and i love that).

i wanna try and spend my time watching movies/tv shows. i stopped watching so much bc my attention span is so fucked and i would get bored and just go back to scrolling. but i really wanna try and train that muscle again. and get back to reading more books. just healthier options so im not just in a bad mood all the time lol.

[solitarelee]

That post about how new users who only like things are ruining this site really sucks to read as someone who has been a lurker since 2011 (technically 2010, but I didn't make my account until 2011). Like, I understand the intention of emphasizing reblogs, but the way that it's phrased, and the OP in the notes instructing people to just make a sideblog if the stuff you like doesn't fit with your main blog theme, and the attitude of reblogging should be the default for everyone for every post they like, all of that make me feel pretty unwelcome. My extreme social anxiety means that I physically struggle to Post and Reblog, and it doesn't seem like the OP understands that can be a barrier. They were pretty unempathetic to at least one fellow long time lurker, saying you can still be a lurker even if you reblog things, kinda treating it almost like a personal rule they don't want to break rather than a different way of interacting with the site. The post was aimed at people who don't know likes don't function the same as on other sites, but the actual argument didn't make any room for people who use tumblr in a different way deliberately and aren't trying to make an algorithm feed happen either. Anyway, anon asks are my main form of social engament on here due to the anxiety. Sorry for word vomiting in your ask box.

I had a knee-jerk instinct to be very unkind about this, because you chose to send this to a creative worker whose income is dependent on social media. (I wish it wasn't, but we just don't live in a world where even Big Artists can just get away with not being their own advertisement team.) I am trying hard to fight that urge because I do understand social anxiety as someone who struggles with agoraphobia. But please think about why you sent me this.

Why do you need me, who can't put food on the table because of the impossibility of getting people to do even the most low-effort Engagements With Content, to comfort you about being too anxious to reblog people's work? Like, I'm not here to absolve you of your guilt, that's between you and yourself and maybe a therapist (not said to be mean, just like the literal person for it). I'm not gonna sit here like "oh no, it's fine, I never feel bad at ALL when stuff I put months of effort into get 0-5 notes, month after month."

It's not your job to promote my stuff, or anyone, but I think seeing artists and the like complain about their struggles vis-a-vis Getting People To Share Content, which is a NIGHTMARE now compared to ten years ago (so you can at least take comfort in it not really being your problem since your behavior has remained unchanged for like 15 years) is going to probably be the price of admission for wordlessly consuming that stuff. You can choose not to feel bad about it; indeed, I invite you to consider the nuance and decide that it's not about you (you even say you know it's directed at other people). I think it'd be a lot healthier for you, personally, to just be able to say "okay, well, that's your opinion and I disagree" without coming into a struggling artist's inbox for some kind of absolution.