#the other 11 nameless bastards

[laurellerual]

Whose your favorite Baratheon?

Ok, first of all, how dare you?! I love all my children equally Stan:

The one true king of my heart and his sweet and doomed fawn.

My rays of sunshine

My personification of all self-destructive tendencies out there

My strong girl and my dashed hopes for the future

Them obv...

And the rest too!

[mytastessuck]

The Residents: Commercial Album

Objectively one of the greatest works of art on the planet, The Commercial Album's development is almost as interesting as the music itself. The whole thing is another dig at Top 40 radio but with a twist: Every song is around one minute as a commercial jingle. As a stunt, the band purchased 40 minutes worth of advertising space on San Francisco's most popular radio station at the time, KFRC, to play the album's songs over and over again for three days. Art or advertising? Who cares when these lucky bastards got to listen to Margaret Freeman on their morning commute?!

Easter Woman

Yes, the perfect ad for a grieving service for your dead spouses! Excellent and ominous!

9/10

2. Perfect Love

Steady thumping beats about whatever you choose to be affectionate with. Perfect for a cock ring commercial.

7/10

3. Picnic Boy

Perfect for an anti-fat shaming PSA...or a chain of restaurants called Picnic Boy.

9/10

4. End Of Home

Eerie and sounds like an approaching intruder...perfect for a security alarm system!

8/10

5. Amber

Got a good western theme to it. Perfect for a cowboy-themed diaper commercial!

8/10

6. Japanese Watercolor

Vaguely far eastern. Perfect to advertise an art gallery!

8/10

7. Secrets

An almost childish melody to accentuate the anxiety of keeping a personal matter (interesting if you know Hardy Fox was gay). Perfect for an antivirus ad!

10/10

8. Die In Terror

Literally horrifying. Perfect tune to advertise any horror movie with. Even Hobgoblins.

10/10

9. Red Rider

Another western themed one. This is perfect to advertise a dude ranch with!

8/10

10. My Second Wife

A bouncy tune that's perfect for any spouse to enjoy! Perfect for advertising a divorce office.

7/10

11. Floyd

Probably the most Residents song on the album with heavy synth and poppiness used to drown out the odd lyrics. Perfect for advertising Taco Bell!

8/10

12. Suburban Bathers

A nice creepy tune about watching others...probably. Perfect for advertising real estate.

9/10

13. Dimples And Toes

A tune that calls to mind horses galloping. Perfect for the defunct chain store Toys R Us!

7/10

14. The Nameless Souls

A nice jingle that feels more like gossip than a song. Perfect for advertising a dating service!

8/10

15. Love Leaks Out

The group gets factory sex on us with machines imitated through their instruments. Perfect for advertising Pep Boys!

8/10

16. The Act Of Being Polite

Absolutely a path through madness. Perfect for advertising therapy services.

10/10

17. Medicine Man

Pounding basses (think that's what they are) accentuate a harmful jingle. Perfect for advertising hospitals!

8/10

18. Tragic Bells

Sounds like a dirge played after a wedding. Perfect for advertising funeral homes!

8/10

19. Loss Of Innocence

The reverb really helps the vocals on this one. Perfect for advertising the phone book!

9/10

20. The Simple Song

A song simple enough that kids can sing it to you while you try to sleep! Perfect for advertising Lionel's Coin Bank!

7/10

21. Up And Downs

Alternating pitches in the vocals really helps the sell the song's titles. Perfect for advertising Chutes And Ladders!

8/10

22. Possessions

A steady tune that never stops picking up throughout the song. Perfect to advertise Dasani to!

7/10

23. Give It To Someone Else

Fretful and anxious, definitely the song you want to pass to another ear like a hot potato. Perfect for advertising condoms!

9/10

24. Phantom

Creeping and threatening, like it was composed by Erik himself. Perfect for advertising Broadway!

7/10

25. Less Not More

Bubbly and fun. Perfect for advertising champagne!

8/10

26. My Work Is So Behind

A bunch of sudden stings make the horror in this song apparent. Perfect for advertising Staples!

9/10

27. Birds In The Trees

Is that a sitar? Sounds like it. Anyway, this is perfect for advertising a botanical garden!

9/10

28. Handful Of Desire

Plinky and sounds like something mice would compose in the church. Perfect for advertising Victoria's Secret!

8/10

29. Moisture

Nice and slippery, as befitting the title. Perfect for advertising Ikea.

9/10

30. Love Is...

You need the drums to have the ladies sing. You just do. This is perfect for advertising a bridal gown shop.

7/10

31. Troubled Man

A surprisingly stringent theme for a troubled song. Perfect for advertising adoption services!

8/10

32. La La

Still hearing a bit of the Western in this one. Did I mention I just left a farm? Anyway, this is perfect for advertising Woody's solo film.

7/10

33. Loneliness

Don't let the loudness fool you. This song encapsulates the melancholy perfectly. Perfect for advertising League Of Legends!

10/10

34. Nice Old Man

Creeping and jarring, like every old man! Perfect for advertising retirement homes!

8/10

35. The Talk Of Creatures

Mumbling of creatures inside you...the obvious advertisement choice for a vet!

9/10

36. Fingertips

Such gallantry that you expect from knighthood. Perfect for advertising Renaissance Faires!

7/10

37. And Between Dreams

Definitely what you hear before you go to sleep. Perfect for advertising a mattress store!

7/10

38. Margaret Freeman

My favorite song from the album so expect no bias when I say it's Andy Patridge's (Sally Sandwich's) best work and should be preserved for future generations to discover. Perfect for advertising Bailey's Ice Cream.

100/10

39. The Coming Of The Crow

Practically getting into metal at this point. Perfect for advertising a Ford truck.

10/10

40. When We Were Young

A perfect way to send you off...and perfect for advertising Power 99 FM.

8/10

Album score: 105/100

Next album is Mark Of The Mole. Hopefully the band will make it through it.

[athletickat]

Top Reads 2020 Fanfiction

I started reading Harry Potter fanfiction this year (thanks to Tik Tok) and these stories I’ve read keep me up at night because I cannot stop thinking about them. 

#1- Manacled by @senlinyu

This is story is a MASTERPIECE. I cannot express how many times I’ve read and thought about this story. The way Hermione loves Draco and Draco loves Hermione is unbeatable. Hermione is a literal boss bitch in this story and my favorite Hermione in everything I’ve read. The build up, the tension, the CHEMISTRY; it is the best thing I have ever read. I could write a whole damn brook report on this story and be proud of it. This story is just... ugh *ultimate chefs kiss*.

#2- Rights and Wrongs series by @lovesbitca8 

The Right Thing To Do, All the Wrong Things, and The Auction are my absolute favorite pieces of writing ever. Draco Malfoy in this series is my horny king, and the best Draco in everything I’ve read. The Auction has a special place in my heart because of hard Hermione works to stay alive and keep the Malfoys alive, as well. All the characters in each story are so well written, especially the Malfoys, and I cannot express how in love I am with each little plot detail and connection between the stories.   

#3- Remain Nameless by @heyjude19-writing

I recently read this story and I cannot get enough of it. This is first fic I’ve read with a wedding scene (two scenes!!) and I cannot put it in words of how perfect it is. This story is all about the love Draco and Hermione have for each other, and it has set such unrealistic expectations for me...ugh. Every chapter had me smiling like an idiot and I could not put it down. 

#4- Cruel and Beautiful World by Lena Phoria 

I am so happy that Lena Phoria turned this fanfiction into a book, but nothing beats the original characters in this story. The way I fell in love with all the characters (except Voldemort, gross) is immaculate. This story deals with a lot of trauma and heavy topics, but the plot and the characters are just too good. Draco is a sweetheart and absolutely whipped for Hermione, but they need each other. I have never laughed so hard while reading a dark AU fic, and this story made my abs hurt. Definitely one to read.

#5- All You Want by @senlinyu

Holy shit. This story has the best smut I have ever read. The way senlinyu describes what's happening to Alpha Draco and Omega Hermione during sex makes me laugh out loud. It is so so good and so so sexy. It is such a fun story to read, and that’s why I love it so much. 

#6- Breath mints / Battle Scars by @onyx-and-elm

This story is the definition of toxicity, but honestly, it’s still so good. Both Hermione and Draco are changed after the war, and they fall in love by rage, sex, and protection of one another. Hermione does not give a single damn about what people may say about her, and Draco just wants her to be happy (although it does take a while for him to see what that really means). Plot and characters are amazing, and the ending is *chefs kiss*.

#7- Isolation by Bex-chan 

The first Dramione fanfiction I’ve ever read, and it has a very special place in my heart. I didn’t think I would like reading Draco Malfoy and Hermione Granger fanfiction, but this story changed my mind and led to my spiral of reading such amazing stories. Such an amazing read, and I love seeing Draco grow into a man that Hermione deserves and loves. This story is iconic.

#8- Hunted by Bex-chan

Another superb story by Bex-chan. A Romance/Mystery story after the war and Draco and Hermione fall in love... hard. They are great together and the plot is amazing. This story is another iconic one for me.

#9- Love and Other Misfortunes by @senlinyu

Another great piece of work from the Queen herself, senlinyu. Draco is so stubborn it hurts, but it’s okay because Hermione is there to save the day (duh). Love these two and the romance between them in this story. Also, Veela Draco with wings and fangs is too much for me. Not that it’s important or anything, but the smut level is through the roof. Love it.

#10- Bring Him to His Knees by @willhavetheirtrinkets

Auror Draco and Auror Harry are an iconic duo. I love how intricate Draco is in this story, and how his past still very much affects his present, but Hermione helps him a lot, and it shows just how much they care for each other. Hermione and Draco dance around each other until they realize *wait* they have feelings for each other! It is not complete yet, but I do check every week or so for updates because it has a good murder mystery plot and a fabulous Dramione. 

#11- The Risk-Reward Ratio by MissiAmphetamine

War fic, and honestly one of my favorite ones. Draco sucks up his pride and goes to the Order for help, and Hermione is the only one who truly excepts him. Draco is a stubborn bastard in this story, but he makes up for it. The scenes are so real, and neither character is perfect, but you’ll see how far they are willing to go for each other. 

#12- The Just World Fallacy by MissiAmphetamine

Sequel to The Risk-Reward Ratio, and this one is tough. Still so good, but deals with torture, PTSD, rape, and more heavy topics. The love that still stands between Draco and Hermione even after all that they have been through together is beautiful. I love this story, and I love seeing how each character grows into their own person while during a war.

#13- Broken by @inadaze22

I have never cried so much while reading a story. This story made ME feel broken because Hermione is quite literally shattered, but so is Draco. It’s a story that makes you feel so many things at once and it is beautiful. Super slow-burn, but in the end, Hermione and Draco are meant to be together. 

#14- This World or Any Other series by @olivieblake

Clean and Marked are incredible stories with a rollercoaster twist. I love each character in this series, and the love that Hermione has for Draco, and vice versa, is the most powerful thing in this universe. The relationship starts with a potion assignment and just extends through there. I love their characters so much alongside the secondary characters and it makes the story so interesting. 6th year Hogwarts and continues with the war, but Draco and Hermione are always there for each other no matter what. 

#15- The Eagles Nest by HeartOfApsen

Ravenclaw Draco and Hermione, 8th year, and Alchemy. This story is so complex, and I couldn’t stop reading it. I love both Draco and Hermione and how they work to settle a problem together. Also seeing all the secret rooms in Hogwarts was another compelling aspect of the story that I loved. They know they need each other, and them being nerds and all, school is what brings them together in the end.

#16- Almost Perfect, Almost Yours by BelleOfSummer

I could not put down this story. No matter how much it angered me, and no matter how much I wanted to throw my laptop at the wall, I couldn’t stop reading. The plot is so interesting where Hermione is raised by a Pureblood family, but she was adopted from muggles, so she is Muggleborn. All the while her and Draco fall in love through their teen years and go through a war together. Hermione is a bad bitch and Draco is whipped (maybe not in a good way). They experience so much together, and in the end, you learn to love them for who they are.

#17- The Green Girl by @colubrina

Hermione is sorted into Slytherin and makes all new friends that do not include Harry Potter or Ronald Weasley. I freaking love this story because Hermione is a literal Queen, and the story itself is so well written. I don’t usually read T-rated works, but I could not put this one down because it has such an interesting plot.

#18- Erised Effect by @adaprix

Smut, smut, and more smut with such a cute plot. I love little Hermione as a bad bitch and big dick Draco as a little softy. I was hooked from the first chapter and it was so crazy. The sex scenes in this are just... *fans self*. This story is a rollercoaster of smut, but Draco and Hermione are my all time favs in this.

#19- Every Day, a Little Death by @lovesbitca8

Draco tries everything to satisfy Hermione, and when I say everything, I mean everything. Such a cute story with such a cute relationship. Hermione doesn’t mean to fall in love, but alas, Draco is a sex God and it was inevitable. I love this story!

#20- Crimson with a Silver Lining by Lady Cailan

A dark AU where Draco is mesmerized by Hermione and her will to stay alive. Their love is so strong, but alas, Draco is a stubborn bastard. This story is an emotional rollercoaster and another story where I could not put it down. Also *spoiler* some family drama going on throughout the story. 

#21- Bond by MrBenzedrine89

*fans self* again because this story is incredible. Love the smut, love the club, love the love between Draco and Hermione. Super interesting details in this story with Draco, Hermione, and the infamous Bond club. Loved reading this story.

I fell down a rabbit whole of Dramione stories this year, and it made me ignore everything I had to in my life just to read them. I can’t wait to see more stories this year and procrastinate my life by reading these stories!

[grailfinders]

Fate and Phantasms #157

Today on Fate and Phantasms we’re making Emiya Alter! No, not that one, the one they gave a really dumb nickname to.

Anyway, Demiya is a Vengeance Paladin to take down anyone who would threaten humanity (and protect himself from mind control nonsense) as well as a Hexblade Warlock to project whatever blades he might need straight into enemies. I know he made the deal with Alaya, but it made him good with swords, so it’s probably fine.

Check out his build breakdown below the cut, or his character sheet over here!

Next up: Man’s worst nightmare

Race and Background

Despite your arguments to the contrary, you’re still a Human, giving you +1 Strength and +1 Dexterity. You also get proficiency in Insight to be a better investigator, and the Fighting Initiate feat, because paladins don’t get the Archery fighting style normally. This gives you +2 on ranged weapon attacks.

What was it that turned you to the path of Alterness? Whatever it was, it made you a Haunted One, giving you proficiency with Investigation and Arcana, as well as a healthy hatred for anything Kiara-based.

Ability Scores

You’re good with guns and small swords, plus you fight shirtless, so make sure your Dexterity is as high as possible. Second is going to be Charisma. You’re a pretty scary guy, we need it for multiclassing,and it’ll help you shoot good later. Your Wisdom is also pretty good, thanks to your built-in mental protection. You’re too affected by your Alterfication to get affected by anything else. Your Strength isn’t that bad, you do use melee weapons too at times and we also need it for multiclassing, but your Constitution is rather low. Kintsugi is very pretty, but it’s not a great way to build a person. Finally, we’re dumping Intelligence. It’s less that you’re dumb, more that you just absolutely don’t care about stuff enough to get scholarly on most subjects.

Class Levels

1. Paladin 1: Paladins get better hit dice and the martial weapons we need for that Fighting Initiate we got, so we’re kinda stuck starting there. First level paladins get proficiency with Wisdom and Charisma saves, as well as two paladin skills. Intimidation is pretty self-explanatory, but you also get Athletics. Look, you’ve got pretty good abs, they had to come from somewhere.

You also get a Divine Sense, letting you sense threats to humanity nearby, and Lay on Hands for a bit of free healthcare for you or whoever else you touch. You get 5 hp of healing per paladin level per long rest, and you can use 5 points from that amount to heal a poison or disease.

Yeah, first level isn’t particularly in-character, but it’ll get better later.

2. Paladin 2: Second level paladins get another Fighting Style, so grab Close Quarters Shooter from the underdark UA for sick melee ranged attacks. This negates the disadvantage caused by making a ranged attack near hostiles, your ranged attacks ignore all but full cover, and you get another +1 to ranged attack rolls.

You also learn how to cast an prepare Spells using your Charisma. You can either use your new spell slots for, y’know, spells, or for a Divine Smite to add on extra radiant damage to a melee attack. Ranged attacks in melee range don’t count, sadly.

As far as prepared spells go, Detect Evil and Good can help hunt down baddies, ditto with Protection from Evil and Good. 

3. Paladin 3: At third level, you can at long last devote yourself to Vengeance!, giving you the spells Bane to trip up foes and Hunter’s Mark to stick some serious damage onto your enemies over time. You also get Channel Divinity once per short rest that you can use in two ways.

Abjure Enemy spends an action to force a wisdom save (DC 8+charisma mod+proficiency) or one creature is frightened for up to a minute or until it takes damage. While frightened, it can’t move. On a success, the creature’s speed is halved for a minute or until it takes damage.

Alternatively, you can swear a Vow of Enmity as a bonus action, giving you advantage on attacks against a nearby creature for a minute or until it hits 0 hp.

You also get Divine Health, making you immune to disease. Like half your body is gold, it’s not like sniffles are a big concern at this point.

4. Paladin 4: Use your first Ability Score Improvement to grab the Crossbow Expert feat. There’s a lot of overlap with Close Range Shooter, but you can now attack multiple times per turn with a crossbow, and you can use your bonus action to attack with a hand crossbow if you attack with a one-handed weapon with your main action. Unfortunately, that’s the one kind of crossbow that won’t work with warlocks, but for now it’s fine.

5. Paladin 5: Fifth level paladins get an Extra Attack, letting you attack twice per turn anyway! Making great use of feat you just got.

You also learn second level spells! Your freebies are Hold Person and Misty Step. Admittedly neither are really in character for you, but if you want to power game Hold Person gives you guaranteed critical hits on the held person, which is super busted when combined with your smites. Food for thought.

Otherwise you can use Magic Weapon and other smites to make normal swords into fancy magic swords.

6. Warlock 1: Bouncing over to warlock for a bit puts you in a pact with an even fancier magic weapon: a Hexblade. You might not have a soul any more, but you do have a Hexblade’s Curse, which you can put on one unlucky bastard as a bonus action once per short rest. The target’s cursed for 1 minute, during which: You add your proficiency to damage against the target, crit on 19s, and you gain HP equal to your warlock level+your charisma modifier when they die.

You also become a Hex Warrior, turning one non-two handed weapon into a charisma based weapon instead of dexterity or strength. You can also use this on any kind of weapon made with your pact weapon feature later.

Finally, you get Pact Magic, which is pretty similar to your old magic except it recharges on short rests instead of long ones. While the spell slots don’t blend like other multiclassing builds, you can use warlock slots to cast paladin spells and vice versa.

Speaking of warlock spells, you get Eldritch Blast to summon gunfire and Sword Burst to summon swords right into people. You also get Cause Fear because that’s most people’s natural reaction to you and Expeditious Retreat to stay in archery range. Just because you can fight in melee range doesn’t mean you should.

7. Warlock 2: Second level warlocks get Eldritch Invocations. Like usual, we’re saving one for level three, but you still get Armor of Shadows now for free Mage Armor on yourself. Now you can finally rip your shirt off and make Kintoki jealous!

You also learn Comprehend Languages. Alaya probably wouldn’t drop you off in someplace without giving you the language to get around, right? Right?

8. Warlock 3: Your pact boon, as you can probably guess, is the Pact of the Blade, letting you summon pretty much any melee weapon you could want as an action. It also counts as magic for overcoming resistance, making the Magic Weapon thing from earlier pointless.

That invocation we were saving becomes Improved Pact Weapon, which expands your pact weapon choices to pretty much any ranged weapon you could want and it gives any weapon you make +1 to attacks and damage.

Honestly there aren’t that many second level spells that I think really fit Emiya as a warlock, but Blur is nice. If you’re going to be nameless, you might as well be faceless too, I guess.

9. Paladin 6: Going back to paladin for a bit lets you create an Aura of Protection, adding your charisma modifier to any save you or allies within 10′ of you make. It’s not an enormous buff, but a +2 is a +2, take what you get.

10. Paladin 7: Seventh level vengeance paladins are Relentless Avengers. When you hit a creature with an attack of opportunity, you can move half your speed as part of the reaction an ignore opportunity attacks. Like a lot of paladin goodies, this doesn’t pair well with your guns, but you do have swords as well.

11. Paladin 8: Another ASI at last! Bump up your Charisma for better saves and spells.

12. Warlock 4: Use this ASI to become Tough for an extra 24 HP now and another 2 each level. If you want to get in close, you’d better be able to take a hit. Also, you’re part gold. Sure it’s a soft metal, but it’s still a metal. That’s worth a few HP.

You also learn True Strike because I’m really hoping you’re aiming those things, and Shadow Blade for yet another sword you can summon.

13. Warlock 5: Fifth level warlocks get another invocation and a third level spell. Spirit Shroud makes all your swords a little bit sharper, dealing extra damage to and slowing down creatures in a 10′ radius. You also get Eldritch Smite, which burns through warlock slots to deal extra force damage, and can be used with ranged weapons.

14. Paladin 9: Ninth level paladins also get third level spells, like Haste which adds to your AC, bumps up your speed, and gives you and extra action for the duration. When the spell ends you have to take a turn to chill, but it’s totally worth it. You also get Protection from Energy, which... I mean if someone’s throwing around acid arrows, yeah go for it. Otherwise you can get more smites and Elemental Weapon for more fancy weapons.

15. Paladin 10: Tenth level paladins get an Aura of Courage, preventing allies in it from being frightened. I’d be more worried about charms, but honestly your wisdom save is pretty good at this point.

16. Paladin 11: Your Improved Divine Smite means you can add radiant damage to melee attacks even when you have no spell slots to burn; unfortunately that’s still just melee attacks, not ranged attacks.

17. Paladin 12: At seventeenth level you can finally use this ASI to bump your Charisma up past the point where your dexterity started, meaning your attaks finally get a bit more accurate thanks to being a Hex Warrior. This also bumps up your spell effectiveness and all your saves.

18. Paladin 13: Thirteenth level paladins get fourth level spells, like Banishment and Dimension Door. You also get access to yet another new smite for yet another new sword.

19. Paladin 14: Your last mainline paladin goodie is a Cleansing Touch, spending an action to end a spell affecting yourself or a willing creature charisma mod times per long rest. You’d think this anti-Kiara protection is coming late, but to be honest you probably should be level 20 to take on a Beast of Humanity.

20. Paladin 15: Your capstone level makes you a Soul of Vengeance, letting you make opportunity attacks on a creature affected by your Vow of Enmity if they try to attack anyone. Again, this only affects melee attacks.

Pros:

Mixing your Hexblade’s Curse and Vow of Enmity together means you’re really good at dealing crits with basically four times the odds of critical attacks each attack compared to your regular fighter. This is especially good for a character that can double smite like you can, dealing serious burst damage easily.

You also deal consistent damage with a +14 to hit and several different ways to stick more damage onto your attacks, like the afforementioned curse, Hunter’s Mark, or Spirit Shroud.

Thanks to your warlock slots recharging on short rests, you can go ham on smites a bit more than most people could, making your Unlimited Lost Works available to you more than other paladins.

Cons:

You’re a paladin specializing in ranged attacks. Admittedly the only things really making you a ranged fighter are your fighting styles, which can easily be changed, but if you’re playing to character you’ll find it a bit harder to use your paladin features.

Another reason staying at range is a good idea is your Concentration saves are really bad, with a total of +0 and no way to improve them.

Starting as a paladin but then adding in hexblade later means you have something of an awkward beginning, with your first couple ASIs not really contributing much to your character, with those first few mostly making up for your weaknesses rather than playing to your strengths.

[degenerate-yandere]

More Yandere OCs

Two blond boys doing what blond boys do.

Special thanks to @3rdgymbros​ for being the first kyu-tie and giving me the motivation to write this.

Anyway here are some more bastards. Hope y’all enjoy. Kinda rough because I sorta rushed these out but I think they get the job done.

picrews used: Scott, Kyu

Name: Kyu

Height: 180 cm (5′11)

Age: ???

Bio: An outwardly urbane young man, who captured the collective heart of audiences around the world through his career as an idol. Kyu’s hailed as an inspiration - a product of hard work, drive, and incredible talent. His supernatural vigor and charm onstage, and his warm, courteous demeanor offstage, earned him the adoration of many love-struck fans. Of course, he’s always so polite when confronted by the seemingly endless declarations of love - responding with a meek blush, a light-hearted chuckle, and a word of appreciation for the kindness of his fanbase, whom affectionately refer to themselves as his ‘Kyu-ties’. His composure and respectable demeanor often lends himself to be a role model for others.

Kyu’s alluring looks, kind demeanor, and unmistakable talent has enraptured crowds and cemented his reputation as the sweetheart that swept the industry...

Of course, Kyu expected nothing less - humans are so easily manipulated, so simple to toy with. Centuries of experience make adopting a new mask a trivial process. His chaste exterior denies the truth that lies beneath - a hedonistic monster, seeking to dispel the boredom of this eternity with little regard for others. He’s a natural sadist, revelling in the joys of tormenting his perceived ‘lessers’. Whether that manifests as roughly sinking his fangs into the neck of some nameless fan, smirking as they scream and cry for mercy. But even that grows stale - instead, Kyu opts to enact his affinity for sadism in more... malicious, meticulous ways. 

To say the object of Kyu’s genuine affection is doomed is an understatement. His sadistic tendencies are certainly diminished when it comes to his darling, but that’s not to say they’re entirely spared from his whims. They’re a blessing to him, really - a delectable bloodbag that never bores him with their presence. Perhaps if he had any faults in his ego, he’d be ashamed to be so utterly obsessed with one of his natural prey. But such matters are of no concern to him; not when you make him feel things he hasn’t experienced in lifetimes.

Despite his sadistic tendencies, he’s much more inclined to follow a manipulative approach. He finds it more fun that way - whether it’s coercing you into a relationship through promises of public scrutiny and demonisation, or scaring you into obedience as he holds you in his lap and tells you everything he wants to do to you for misbehaving. 

Kyu has no qualms about feeding from you either, you taste utterly divine. He gets a kick out of hearing you whimper or gasp when he carefully sinks his fangs into your neck, it’s adorable. It has the added benefit of draining you of your energy, giving him a reason to dote on you and restricting your ability to be difficult.

Romantic rivalry is never a perceived threat to Kyu. They’re one of his ‘lessers’, let alone a complete nobody. Defamation, financial ruin, torture or outright murder are Kyu’s favorite ways of disposing of any competition, merely doing so out of a sense of obligation. He can’t imagine why you’d choose anyone over him, he’s almost convinced that you want him as much as he wants you. He isn’t  delusional enough for that though, but it won’t stop him from teasing you about it nonetheless.

Let Kyu lock you in a gilded cage, shower you in his wealth, suffocate you with affection and pointless reprimand, and maybe his love will be bearable.

Name: Scott

Height: 195 cm (6′5)

Age: 27

A gruff police detective with an iron-clad reputation of delivering swift and decisive justice. Disciplined, astute, and ruthless in his pursuit of the truth, he’s renown as a local hero in his city of residence. He’s praised for his determination to solve a case - and his track record of wild success in doing so. Scott’s often feared as much as he is hailed a hero; his intimidating physique and blunt demeanor often frightens his admirers away. It isn’t uncommon for the criminals he’s interrogated to whimper at the sight of him.

But of course, his heroism becomes deficient when his darling falls into his life. The shame that builds in his core is unbearable; he isn’t supposed to have these kinds of disgusting thoughts - his fantasies and desires denying him of sleep. He shouldn’t feel this strongly, he knows it’s wrong, but there’s a part of him that so desperately wants to give in. He’s lucid in that regard, perhaps even slightly reluctant, but his stone resolve only goes so far. He can convince himself that it’s for your own good; that he knows firsthand the horrors of the world, and that he’s the only one that can protect you. That’s why he has to take you.

Trailing you home at night to make sure you get there safely, breaking into your apartment and taking some beloved momentos - his adoration is a downward spiral into unhinged obsession. The signs of a break-in, however, don’t go unnoticed. Going to the police for help is quite possibly the nail in your coffin. He insists on taking your case, of holding your terrified self close and telling you everything’s going to be okay, that he’ll protect you. Of course, if you were to find out it was him all along? Who’d possibly believe you? You’d be dismissed as a raving lunatic.You’d feel betrayed, terrified, hopeless. But Scott tracks down your snivelling little self and pulls you into a forceful embrace. He didn’t want you to find out, he remarks. But he tells you it’s finally time to come home.

Scott wants nothing more than routine and domesticity; to come home after a long day of work to a cooked meal and the affections of his beloved spouse. He wants to train you to be the perfect partner, to have you reciprocate just a fraction of the love he has for you. He’s prepared to shower you in gifts and rewards for any behaviour he deems ‘progress’. But if Scott is one thing, it’s strict. He has little patience and paper-thin tolerance for disobedience, and he’s quick to correct it as he seems fit. There is no sadistic joy to his punishments - he doesn’t want to hurt you, but it’s simply a means to an end.

With his reputation and arsenal of skills, it’s easy for him to dispose of any perceived threats to your ‘relationship’. No one would suspect him if a potential suitor or intervener were to disappear. It’s a terrible fall from grace - committing atrocities and crimes he would’ve never considered before. But it’s for you, he tells himself over and over as he looms over one of your exes with a bloodied baseball bat in his hand. It’s all okay, because it’s all for you.

Scott’s tired. All he wants is to shower you in his awkward, rigid affection and gift you all the things he knows you deserve. So be good, don’t make him put you in your place.

[fletchphoenix]

Skating On Thin Ice

Chapter 4 of the Varigo Coffee Shop AU is upon us!

Agh, I LOVE WRITING THIS SO MUCH!!! I’m so so sorry if all the content is getting annoying - I really want to get as much as I can done before school starts up again (in a week,,,,aha) so just let me know if it’s annoying y’all. Anyway! Thank you for the support!

Word Count - 3588

TW - Strong Language 

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  Varian tied his hair back into a ponytail as he walked downstairs to the kitchen, Ruddiger strutting after him happily. He dragged his feet across the silver carpet in his still-sleepy haze, passing awards and family pictures that were displayed proudly in the main hall of the house. A yawn escaped his mouth despite his attempts to hold it back, and he reached up to rub the tears that built in his eyes away along with the last remnants of sleep. A sleep his body desperately wanted him to return back to, judging by how sluggish he felt. The kitchen door moaned as he pushed it open, taking his time on every movement he took.

  He scavenged through the kitchen for something to eat, all the while Ruddiger mewled and meowed to gain some attention and, while he was at it, some food to eat. Varian eventually gave in, lifting the bowl onto the counter and grabbing a sachet of cat food. He emptied the packet, the tabby cat jumping onto the counter and scoffing it down, causing him to chuckle while he took out the bread and butter from the refrigerator. “Toast it is, buddy.” he uttered to himself as he slid the bread into the device. 

  While the toast was..well, toasting, he climbed onto a counter and opened the cabinet near the stove. An assortment of cups greeted him - all with different colours and various patterns. A certain one met his eye. The corners of his lips quirked up in a smile as the memories came flooding back to him. 

  “Are you sure you want me to have this? After all I’ve done to you..?” his nervous voice asked. He was sixteen again in Rapunzel’s kitchen after his father had woken up from his coma. The aroma of cinnamon was in the air combined with apple, creating the illusion that it was fall in the small room as Rapunzel set aside the gift and took his hands in her own. Her expression was earnest, honest. 

  “Varian..I don’t care what you’ve done in the past. We’ve all forgiven you, regardless of what you may think. You’re family.” she stated with a smile that held nothing but love for the boy in front of her. Tears built in his eyes as he looked over at the silver box, wrapped in a teal bow, set on the kitchen table by the blonde only a few moments prior.

  Taking a seat on the lilac cushioned chairs, he brought the box closer to him with shaky hands and unwrapped the dainty bow carefully, as though it would fall apart at even the slightest amount of force. Upon lifting the lid, he was met with the sight of some paper - matching the color of the bow. Pulling it out, he gasped as his eyes met the mug that had been placed in the box with care. He took it out and examined it in his hands.

  The mug was teal (also like the bow and paper it was packed with) decorated with paintings of test tubes, beakers and a small raccoon on the side. Ruddiger. Unwillingly, his eyes started to water again, tears betraying him and rolling down his cheeks hitting the table cloth below him. “Thank you.” He uttered, his voice barely a whisper as he struggled to hold back his tears. Arms came around from behind him and pulled him into a motherly embrace, a gentle kiss being placed on the back of his head as he let himself cry freely. A swift turn allowed him to hug the blonde, his eyes squeezing shut to rid them of the last few tears that had developed in them before he moved away.

  “Me, Eugene and Cass searched for hours, but couldn’t find the right one. Then I thought ‘Hey! Why don’t we paint a mug for him?’ and thus..that was created. It’s okay, right? I tried to put everything I knew you liked on it, but I wasn’t sure, so I had to get Cass to-” Her rambling was cut off as the boy clinged to her with his face buried into the fabric on her shoulder. Reluctantly, she ran her fingers through his raven locks and exchanged the hug. 

  “I love you, Rapunzel. You’re the best sister in the world.” he whispered as he held onto her, his hands gripping onto her shirt as he let himself be vulnerable around Rapunzel. He’d tormented and hurt her so much..but she still cared for him.

  “I love you too, Varian.” She replied, moving out of the hug when he was calmer and ready. “Anyway, Cmon! We need to make you one of my infamous vanilla lattes now that you have your own cup!” She declared, clapping her hands and picking up the cup to start the drink. His eyes followed her as she moved expertly around the kitchen and prepared his drink. A smile steadily grew on his face.

  He was forgiven.

  He was home.

  He seized the cup and hopped down from the counter, closing the ivory door of the cabinet and heading towards the coffee machine. He set the cup under it and started up the machine, leaning against the counter and checking his phone. Wednesday, 8:14am. Good - he woke up in time to get ready for his class at 11. “No messages from Hugo though.” his brain reminded him, disappointment making a heavy weight in his stomach. Maybe he wasn’t up yet? Probably, he reasoned as he took the toast from the toaster and buttered it before grabbing his coffee and sitting at the table. 

  Ever the greediest cat on earth, Ruddiger settled at Varian’s feet and swatted at them with his paw. “Oh my god, you’ve just had your breakfast! No!” he shook his foot to scare the cat away, but he didn’t let up. The evil little bastard continued swatting at his foot until, eventually, Varian let up. “Okay!” he yelled, accepting his defeat as he opened another package of cat food, emptied it into the burgundy food bowl and threw it away. That seemed to do the trick - the stubborn feline finally moving away from the table and leaving his owner in peace.

  “I swear..all you do is eat and sleep all day, every day.” he muttered to himself as he took a prolonged sip of his coffee. It hit the mark - him feeling way more energised as the caffeine kicked in. Taking a bite from his toast, he smiled to himself and looked around the kitchen at the wallpaper that had been wearing away for quite some time, at the window just above the sink that looked out on the garden (that they honestly never used enough now) he used to play in as a kid with his mom, at the small frames across the wall holding precious memories of his childhood from before the incident. It wasn’t much by any means, but it was his home. 

  He glanced at his phone screen again. 8:30am. “Okay, time for me to get ready.” he proclaimed to no one in particular, moving to his feet and scraping the chair back across the kitchen floor. Cringing at the noise, he cast a glance to Ruddiger, who was sleeping contently on the windowsill. He could be so cute sometimes. Only sometimes though. He picked up his plate and cup, placing them in the sink underneath the cat. He reached his now-free hand out and ran it down the cat’s fur gently before heading back upstairs to his room.

  Once he was dressed, opting for a black sweater and navy trousers along with some sneakers, he picked up his bag. Packing in his laptop and chemistry books, he moved downstairs for the final time to head outside. He glanced at the coat rack, pulling on an ink-like coat and a knitted emerald scarf Rapunzel had given him as a Christmas present one year - him silently noting that it matched the color of Hugo’s eyes. (This thought made him feel bubbly - knowing full well Hugo would love it if he saw it. He made a mental note to wear it next time Hugo offered for them to go on a date.) He unlocked the door, scooping up his keys and heading out the door.

  The first thing that he noticed was just how cold the temperature was - the chill travelling down his spine. Nonetheless, he shoved his hands into his pockets and began his journey to the campus, eyes focusing on the floor in silence. It wasn’t long, only 20 minutes, but the chill got to him fast and by the time he’d stepped into the labs, he was shivering intensely. Giving a nod to his professor, he took his seat (second to last row, three seats from the aisle) and took out his equipment, ready to start the lesson. 

  He couldn’t focus - all lesson he subtly scrolled through his phone as he prayed Hugo would send him a text or something to let him know he was okay. He gazed down at the phone screen. Surely he would be awake by now, so why wasn’t Hugo texting him. He huffed and slid back in his chair, desperately trying to keep his focus on the lesson.

  The professor kept them late. Again. Varian hurriedly shoved his stuff into his bag and began rushing down to the library. Wind whistled past his ears and his scarf blew frantically around his neck from just how fierce it was. His cheeks went a deep shade of scarlet, dusting his nose and ears. Freckles sat defined over his face as he made his way past the nameless students and over to Nuru and Yong - who, by the looks of it, had started astronomy without him. 

  “Sorry guys, I was just-” he cut himself off at the sight of Hugo, leaning over Yong and explaining part of the physics work set out in front of him. God, he looked breathtaking. His hair was tied back in its usual small ponytail, with a moss green winter coat around his shoulders and goggles hanging round his neck. He glanced up at Varian and immediately straightened, pushing his glasses up his nose with a broad smile on his face. Fuck. Why did he have to look so good in green?

  “Varian! Hey, I’ve been waiting for you!” he commented, making his way around the table to put his arm round the other boy’s shoulders. The mere action made Varian’s face flush in embarrassment, Hugo not helping whatsoever as he pulled the younger closer to him. He seemed to be revelling in the way he was making Varian a flustered, stuttering mess. “Well then. I know this may be extremely heartbreaking for you, Nuru, but we must be taking our leave now. I bid thee farewell!” he declared, ushering Varian towards the door as Nuru rolled her eyes and muttered ‘Yeah, you wish.’ under her breath.

  “Hold on-what do you mean? Where are we going?” Varian queried, looking up at the taller boy who had just swept him away from his friends with absolutely no explanation. His mood became disheartened as a wicked grin grew on Hugo’s face, him stepping back and raising his eyebrow. “What are you planning, Hugo Atkinson?” he implored.

  “Welllll….” Hugo began as he took Varian’s hand in his own and interlaced their fingers, moving to stand in front of him. “I promised you another date! So I came to pick you up and remembered ‘Shit, it’s Wednesday!’ so I drove to the library and waited! Your friends showed up and you hadn’t yet, so I just..sat down with them and decided to offer my extensive knowledge on literally everything to them. And managed to convince Nuru to give you up for a day so I could take you out. Also off topic but..I’m ninety-eight percent sure she hates me, but as if I care!” he rambled, looking down at the confusion on the raven haired boy’s beautiful face. A smile tugged at his lips. “Long story short, I’m taking you on a date. Surprise!” 

  Varian stood dumbfounded before a breathy laugh left his lips, bringing Hugo down to his level and placing a fleeting kiss on his cheek. “That’s adorable. Go on then, take me away, Casanova.” 

  He relished in the blush that flooded over Hugo’s cheek and the stuttering that followed as he held Varian’s hand tight and led him along the cobbled streets of Corona. They walked and walked until Hugo gestured to a small ice-skating rink in the town centre. “And our date is ice-skating!” he remarked, squeezing Varian’s hand. “I hope that’s okay. I just thought we needed a little switch up from the coffee shop.”

  Varian gasped in excitement and gave a frantic nod. “Hugo, this is perfect! Thank you so much!” he cried as he dragged the blonde along to go and get some skates so they could go onto the ice. The taller boy merely laughed and looked down at the childish excitement on his face. God, he loved this boy so much. It didn’t seem real. 

  As soon as they got their skates on and headed onto the ice, Varian’s mood soured.

  He must’ve slipped a billion times as soon as they got on, finally relenting and heading to grip onto the barrier. His mom took him thousands of times when he was little. Why was he forgetting how to do it now? He let out a groan of frustration and rubbed his face with his hand. Why was this so hard? Now he was embarrassing himself in front of Hugo and Hugo would never want to see him again and-

  “Hairstripe?” a voice came from behind him, a hand resting on his waist. “Hey, no. Let me show you, okay?” Hugo gestured and trailed his hand down, linking it with Varian’s and beginning to glide, moving further and further away from the barrier. 

  It felt like time had frozen, or the universe had fallen away and left only him and Hugo as the travelled in continuous circles round the rink. Hugo squeezed his hand in reassurance whenever he thought he might fall and caught him when he stumbled. It was perfect - just them with no interference from anyone else. It was perfect. 

  After a while, they exited the rink laughing and high on a cloud of pure euphoria with their hands still interlaced and warm. Varian let out a happy sigh and turned his head to look at Hugo, who’s free hand snaked around his waist. “It’s been fun today. I wanna do this again. All the time.” He muttered, moving his hand to cup Hugo’s cheek and rub it with his thumb absentmindedly, his eyes focusing on the way Hugo’s sparkled in the soft light of the lanterns outside. 

  “Varian.” Hugo whispered his name in response, letting go of his hand to rest under the boy’s chin. He tilted his head and began to lean in. Varian’s eyes fluttered shut as they were only centimetres- no. Millimetres apart. He could feel Hugo’s breath on his lips. Just a little more-

  He was tugged back by a hand grasping his collar to see Eugene in front of him. “Varian what the fuck are you doing?! Why the hell are you out here with him?” he yelled and turned to face his little brother. Varian took a mental note on the fury painted over Eugene’s usually relaxed demeanour. “Y’know what? Tell me in the car. We’re leaving.” He grabbed the boy’s wrist and forcefully tugged him towards the car, despite Varian’s struggling and protests.

  Hugo stood dumbfounded and watched as Varian was pulled away from him, tears building in his eyes as he looked at the sidewalk he was left on as the car drove away. He pulled out his phone to make a call.

  “What.” Donella’s voice dripped with annoyance.

  “I won’t be coming in tonight, sorry.” he declared as he hung up the phone. Quietly, he pulled up the hood of his coat and picked Varian’s emerald scarf off the floor before silently putting it on and beginning his journey home. He knew full well he’d suffer tomorrow for that, but it didn’t matter anymore. He pushed his glasses into his hair and wiped away the tears they were hiding, continuing to walk away from the town centre and to his apartment.

  Unlocking the door, he leaned back to shut it before sliding to the floor and letting himself cry unabashedly. Why? Why did it have to be like this? Did life really hate him that much? Now he’d never be allowed to see Varian again-or Varian would find out about everything he’s done and decide he didn’t want someone like that in his life and leave him. Just like everyone else.

  He felt like he’d cried for hours when he finally went upstairs and lay on his bed, letting Olivia out of her cage to sit on the bed beside him as he stared numbly at the ceiling. Maybe that's how it was meant to be. Maybe him and Varian weren’t meant to be together. Someone as perfect as Varian deserved better than him...he let out a pained sigh and turned to face Olivia. “Well Liv..it was fun while it lasted, huh?”

  As soon as they were in the car, Eugene’s tangent had begun. “What happened to texting, huh? To letting your family know you weren’t gonna be there because you were busy with something else? Jesus Christ, Varian, we’ve all been terrified! I have been waiting outside the library since 5! Now it's 8pm! And what’s worse is you were with a criminal! A goddamn CRIMINAL!” he ranted on and on, Varian turning his head and glaring at Eugene.

  “What do you mean ‘criminal’? Weren’t you one before? Never mind that, I was a criminal before too!” he snarled, his head whipping back around to glare out of the car window. He didn’t even recognise where they were driving anymore - the surroundings too dark to see anything.

  “That little shit has been committing petty theft in the area - pickpocketing and all that. And so what if we were like that? People like him never change. I would know!”

  “But we’ve changed, Eugene!” 

  “We’re different to him, Varian-”   “How the fuck are we different to him?!”

  “Varian-”   “NO! Tell me how the fuck we are different to him!-”

  “THAT'S ENOUGH, VARIAN!” Eugene’s voice boomed through the car, stunning Varian into silence as he flinched away from the brunette in shock. His bottom lip trembled and his shoulders shook as he desperately attempted to hold back his tears. “Shit-Varian, I-”

  “Pull over. Now.” Varian stated, his voice oozing with hurt and anger as he kept staring at his feet. Eugene obliged sadly and pulled the car over, watching the younger boy get out and start sprinting into the night. He rested his head against the steering wheel, tears building in his eyes. Well, now he’d fucked up. He hadn’t meant to yell so loud at Varian...fuck. He sighed and began the drive home, praying to himself that Varian would get back safe.

  Once he knew he was far away from the car, he stopped running. He sat on the floor and pressed his head against his knees. In 7, hold 7, out 7, he told himself and kept repeating multiple times. His chest eventually stopped heaving and his limbs stopped aching. He leaned back and stared at the stars in the sky, deep in thought.

  Everything was perfect. He was happy, Hugo was happy..so why did it all have to end so badly? He bit the inside of his cheek as he thought of Hugo. He had to see him again. He couldn’t just leave him. His hands shook as he unlocked his phone and scrolled through his contacts. He took one final deep breath and called Hugo. 

“Hello? Varian?” Oh god. His voice sounded so broken. He must’ve been crying this whole time. It was so much different from how it usually sounded. Varian felt his heart shatter a little bit more as he listened to the boy on the other end of the phone. “Varian, whats up?”

 “What’s your address? I’m coming over. Now.” He bluntly stated, more of a request than a question. He definitely needed to see the other boy now, desperately.

   Confusion laced Hugo’s voice as he replied to Varian, a light creaking sounding in the background as he presumably moved to sit up. “Are you sure, Varian? What’s going on-” 

  “Just tell me, Hugo!” He yelled, his desperation clear. “Please. I need to see you.” He added the last part, lowering his voice significantly and brushing his tears away at the other boy’s barely audible ‘okay’ in response. 

  Hugo shut himself up, sending through the address and hanging up on the distraught boy. He lay back on his bed, a frown on his face before heading down the hall to sit in the living room. 20 minutes later, a knock rang through the tiny building and he sprinted to unlock the door, his eyes meeting the tearful boy that he loved so dearly. Silently, he stepped out of the way to let the boy in before closing the door and pulling him into an embrace. The younger gripped onto his shirt and cried, each sob wracking his whole, thin frame. Hugo bit his lip and let out an exasperated sigh.

  This really was going to be a long night.

[pomegranates-and-blood]

for the 🌟directors commentary🌟 prompt, this line from galla in chapter 34 of nostalgia has been bouncing around in my head: “You are free here, freer than...than you have been in a long time, I think. I don’t know the King, but I’ve heard how his wife seems sent by the Gods, both for his sake and his home’s...”

it gets touched on briefly a couple of times in the story, but if you’ve thought about it, what DO the ppl of kattegat think of their foreign queen? great work on the last chapter!!

Hi sweetheart! That is such a fantastic question, thank you!

So, in that conversation the Reader is not-so-indirectly asking Galla how much she knows of her situation in Kattegat and her everything with Ivar, right? Galla’s ‘you are free here’ is a ‘I know he doesn’t keep you a prisoner, I know you are a free woman here’, whereas her ‘freer than...than you have been in a long time, I think’ is Galla affirming what the Reader tells Ivar in Chapter 25, that she is herelf with him like she has been with no other, not since she left the Roads to return to Greece. Galla, less than Sieghild but still more than anyone else, is aware of the Reader’s struggles when it came not only to the whole deal with Narses, but to being bound to her mother’s (Danae) legacy and being made Hiereia. In Kattegat she is free of those binds, of that legacy, while also being free of the more literal chains of a) the empire and their crackdown on hellenism and b) Narses and the betrothal.

The second part of Galla’s dialogue that you quoted is for the same purpose, Galla explaining how much she knows of the situation in Kattegat, though by the mean she knows, which is secrets and rumors. Ivar’s marriage to the Reader proves very beneficial even past the personal elements, since he is marrying a woman that (in great measure because of her ‘strange’ or ‘foreign’ ways, but also because of who she is and what titles she carries, amongst them yes, witch) so many people want, it gives him a prestige of sorts. Ivar lives by the public sphere, he is very performative in his actions and a lot of what he does is both a consequence of public opinion while also being caused more directly by it. That was a messy way to word it, but what I mean is: how Ivar is percieved by others (or how he thinks he is percieved by others) dictates how he acts and the things he does, both in persuit of any goal (being recognized as the better amongst his brothers, for example) and because he is cornered (or feels like it) by that public opinion (his Chapter 27ish ‘I’d rather have them fear me’ when he expresses his fear that the people of Kattegat will never see anything other than less of a man in him, as an example). This is a lot of words to say this: Ivar marrying someone, especially marrying someone that is desired by others, and someone with the traits of the Reader, gives him a pride that he didn’t have before. He goes peacock mode, basically. But yeah, in his own way he is reassured by that public display of having a wife, and a wife that is a mighty woman on her own right. So, a prouder Ivar, a more confident one, is a more chill one; which proves great for the people of Kattegat. Minus a couple of nightly razings through the docks to find a couple of merchants he desperately wants dead, he is more chill. So, for his sake, because this bastard got himself one hell of a wife, and for the sake of his home, because the people benefit from that marriage and its effect on their king, she seems sent by the Gods; that is the word around the area, which is how Galla percieves things: through rumors and people.

As to what exactly the people of Kattegat think of her? As to not bother people with a wall of text on their dashboards, Imma answer under the cut :)

Thank you so much for asking, this was very fun!

Come ask me some insight about my works!

So, at the beginning they knew nothing of her, not even her name (which, when your name is what carries your fame, finding out about this nameless woman who is somehow a queen of a land they cannot even imagine and known for it, famous for it, fucks with their minds a bit); so they are, understandably, fucking terrified. Because she arrives in Kattegat at the side of their king, who just casually goes about announcing he will marry her...what, a month later? Nutty, especially when people were already whispering of how she had bewitched Ivar, since he had stopped a battle in her name (he technically didn’t, but gossip gonna gossip, you know?). So, she is either a) really a witch, and a powerful one at that, since she can bewitch a son of Ragnar, Ivar the fucking Boneless, or b) enough of a woman that Ivar, a clear-minded Ivar, bends over backwards for, which is also terrifying, maybe even moreso than the alternative.

So, they don’t like her at the beginning. She is foreign, and strange, and very cold while at the same time having no issue making a scene defying Ivar in the apothecary (Chapter 11), and she is whispered to be a witch, that she has bewitched the most ruthless man they know; and she is going to be made queen, the most powerful woman in Kattegat. Understandably, they are apprehensive, if not fearful, and they do not like her.

With time she starts to grow on the general people, she is close to the regular folk by being a healer with the others (and, even though she is an arrogant little shit when she repeats it, she is one of the best, if not the best, healer in Kattegat; which means she directly improves quality/life over there in that regard), and in between healing broken bones, treating fevers and colds, and assisting a few births; she is more a human woman than this distant whatever that they might have seen her as before. She has a name, she has people close to her, she has quirks and depth, she is no longer a witch to be feared.

And like I said above, she has an influence on Ivar that I think the people of Kattegat would be (for the most part) happy with. She keeps him preoccupied, like Hvitserk says in Chapter 16, and that is good news to the people, y’know? This one doesn’t make him believe he is a god at least, they can just live their lives without too many dramatic breaks in their daily routines lol. But yeah, and especially after winter her effect on Ivar is apparent, since the Ivar of þrá, or the Ivar Freydis speaks of in Alatheia, is one that craves/loves battle and war, and spring means war to them since they can set sail and do their thing, but winter means staying home, staying home where he is reminded of what he is lacking and, like Freydis says, is a beast in a cage for four/six months of the year. So, now he’s not as much of a bastard during the colder months. He still is (a bastard), the Reader is no saint and against what Alatheia!Fraydis might believe not a goddess either, so yeah, even she has limitations lol; but yeah.

She doesn’t truly step into being queen until winter, since, like she reluctantly thanks him for in Chapter 22, Ivar does keep things from changing much once they are married, both for her and their people; but yeah, past an apprehension that will never truly go away, the people of Kattegat can (and have) come to accept and love this foreign queen of theirs.

Hope this was understandable, and that the answer satisfied you! Thank you so much for such a wonderful ask! And I’m very happy to hear you liked last chapter! Sending you my love!

[quickspinner]

Hey Gorgeous - Under Your Skin 22

Sorry about that little glitch there, here you go.

All four boys stood and stared at the building.

“Well there goes our game,” muttered Miles. 

Evan sighed. “Steve, you complete—”

“Relax, guys, I got it,” Luka said, shoving Evan lightly to stop his tirade. He turned toward the picnic area and hollered, “Hey Gorgeous!”

Marinette turned around, and Luka motioned her over. She smiled at the other girls and then jogged over to him. “Getting y-your ass k-kicked and nnneed mmme to b-bail me y-you out?” she teased.

Luka kissed her temple, grinning as he draped an arm over her shoulder. “Someone who shall remain nameless,” he glared over her head at Steve, “Got a little too enthusiastic and unfortunately, he has a great arm and crappy aim.”  He pointed to the roof where the ball had landed. “Can you help us out?” 

“Mm,” Marinette said thoughtfully, eyeing the building, and then she bumped him with her hip. “You j-just w-want mmme to show off.”

“I do love watching you act like a superhero, you know that,” he agreed. “But we really did lose the ball, I swear.”

Marinette sighed, and began taking off her jacket. “You owe mmme.” 

“Oh, baby, you know I’m good for it,” Luka grinned, wiggling his eyebrows at her as he took the jacket she handed him.

“You guys are gross,” Evan muttered behind him. “I don’t know how Juleka puts up with you.”

Luka snorted. “She’s worse, that’s how. Now if you want the ball back, you better ask the lady nicely.”

Evan and Steve exchanged a look, and Miles looked similarly perplexed. “You can’t be serious,” Steve said. “How’s she going to do that?”

“That d-didn’t sound like a p-please,” Marinette sniffed, folding her arms.

“Please, Gorgeous,” Luka said, slipping his arm around her and squeezing her hip. “Show ‘em what you got, babe, I can’t wait to see their faces,” he murmured in her ear. 

“You owe mmme,” she repeated, flicking his forehead. 

“Don’t push me into saying something dirty you’ll just get mad at me for saying in public,” Luka warned her, laughing. 

“Yeah, yeah,” Marinette said, shaking out her arms and then her legs, then doing a few easy stretches.

Luka folded his arms and grinned back at his friends before turning his gaze back on Marinette.

“I still don’t under—” Steve cut off as Marinette took off running toward the building. She ran up a good chunk of the wall, caught a second story windowsill and pulled herself up it, then swung off to the side to grab nothing Luka could see and haul herself up the building like a spider. He tore his eyes from her for just long enough to take in the wide-eyed stares of his friends and appreciate their expressions. All the boys gasped as she made a leap to catch the edge of the overhang.

“Fuck me,” Evan muttered under his breath.

“In your dreams, jackass,” Luka said, shoving his best friend again before turning back to the building just in time to see Marinette swing herself up over the top of the building. “She’s mine. And I am so hers,” he sighed, not even trying to hide the goofy smile on his face.

“God, what must she be like in bed,” Steve muttered as they watched Marinette reverse her climb down the building, ball in hand. He winced when Miles smacked him upside the head.

“Respect, man,” Miles admonished.

“What? We were all thinking it!” Steve protested. 

“Wouldn’t you like to know,” was Luka’s smug reply. “And just for the record,” he added, “I would put any one of you bastards in the ground for her, so keep your hands to yourself.” He gave Steve a withering look. “Assuming Marinette even left enough of you to bury if you tried it. I’ve seen her take down guys who got handsy at the club. Pretty sure the lead bouncer offered her a job last time.”

Marinette jogged up, and tossed the ball into the group of staring boys. It bounced off Steve’s head. 

“Thanks, babe,” Luka said, kissing her forehead. “You’re the best. Have I mentioned I love watching you work?” 

Giggling, she slapped his cheek lightly and gave him a wink, then headed back to the crowd of girls at the table, most of whom were staring just as slack-jawed as the guys.

“So,” Luka said, scooping up the ball. “Are we playing or what?”

Evan chuckled. “You know I don’t think I’ve said it before, but I’m happy for you, bro. Jealous as hell, honestly, but really happy for you.” They exchanged a fistbump as they got in position, but Luka was shaking his head.

“You don’t know even half of how amazing she is,” he said fondly. “Gorgeous and strong and fearless is barely even scratching the surface.”

Evan chuckled. “Dude, you have got it bad.”

“I’m a lost cause, don’t even try to rescue me,” Luka said cheerfully, waving at Marinette.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 |  Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15 | Part 16 | Part 17 | Part 18 | Part 19 | Part 20 | Part 21 | Part 22 | Part 23

A continuation of Hey Gorgeous Part 1| Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Bonus Scene | Now on AO3

@thethirdwheelfriend @mystery-5-5

[aegor-bamfsteel]

Why do people say that Aegor raped Calla when she was a child? Daemon betrothing his oldest daughter to Aegor does not mean the marriage was consummated when she was a child. Sadly, Daemon himself was betrothed as a child. His grandmother Daenaera was married when she was 6 and his grandfather Viserys II was 12 when he wed and 13 when he had his first child, only a year younger than Daemon when he had his. Usually, it is custom to wait to consummate if the bride is a child.

Furthermore, the people who hate the Blackfyres try to frame it as Daemon selling his daughter to be raped, but I doubt that is why he betrothed her to Aegor since he already has Aegor’s unconditional support. Calla and Aegor never had children, per GRRM, so Aegor championed his nephews and nieces, essentially dedicating his life to his brother and his family. Daemon didn’t need to sell his daughter to Aegor for support, so that was not the reason for the betrothal. (2/3)

My point is that GRRM is wildly inconsistent with his child brides (and grooms). He uses Unwin Peake’s nameless daughter dying in childbirth at the age of 12 as a reason for why he is so despicable (and that is despicable). But then has Aemma Arryn consummate her marriage at age 13 and paints her father, grandparents, uncle, and husband as decent people. Daenaera is then married at age 6 but doesn’t consummate until age 15 or 16. It’s due to Aegon’s depression instead of custom. (3/3)

Thank you for the very thorough ask, tiger. I hope that I have successfully responded to all of your questions. Calla, as with all Blackfyres (and many non-Targaryen women), has certainly gotten a raw deal when it comes to page time/character depth; her only mention is in twoiaf: “Whatever the case may be (for Aegor’s anger at the Targaryens and Bl00draven), Aegor Rivers soon began to press Daemon Blackfyre to proclaim for the throne, and all the more so after Daemon agreed to wed his eldest daughter, Calla, to Aegor.” As Yandel doesn’t make any further comments, I assume the people who believe Calla was raped as a child exist in fandom rather than on page. Rape is a very sensitive subject, and I’m trying to keep the fanwank a bit quieter, so my response will be under the cut.

Why do people say Aegor raped Calla as a child? This actually involves several leaps in logic I don’t find convincing, so I’ll try to break it down:

We are first introduced to Aegor in the Dunk and Egg novellas via mention by some Blackfyre supporters, who are the natural antagonists of the Targaryens; the protagonist, Dunk, is best friends with the Targaryen prince Egg. Many of the Blackfyre supporters are minor antagonists to Dunk, especially in The Mystery Knight when they attempt to kill him (Alyn Cockshaw) or kidnap Egg (Tommard Heddle). Meanwhile, Bittersteel is a legendary hero to Blackfyre admirers (such as Osgrey), at least an important hoped-for ally to the Whitewalls conspirators (Gormon Peake needed some quick victories so Aegor would have faith in his and Daemon II’s rebellion), and a threat Bl00draven takes as seriously as the Blackfyre sons themselves. As an important member of a faction which has members that tried to harm the protagonist Dunk, people see Aegor as a villain. 

The problem with seeing him as a villain (as opposed to simply an antagonist, which he undoubtedly is if you consider the Targaryens protagonists of the story) is that, due to lack of page-time and because he’s not that bad, he never actually does anything too villainous. Urging someone to rebel is at the end of the day just words. He took Bl00draven eye out in battle, but that appears to be an accident and doesn’t seem to have slowed him down. Leading the Golden Company to sack Qohor for failing to honor a contract is severe, but its only mention is in a non-canonical app that few people read. When his chief rival Bl00draven is a canonical child-murderer, child-crippler, kinslayer, deserter, head of a secret police organization, tyrannical overlord, etc...Aegor’s “evil deeds” don’t appear to add up to much. He might even seem more sympathetic than Bl00draven! But that cannot be, so fandom has to headcanon villainous behavior for him, because he must be a villain antagonist.

But what sort of villainous behavior should he do? In order to root for Bl00draven against him, it must be something terrible. GRRM often uses rape to signal how terrible a male character is (and how awful Westeros can be). The most evil villains in the main series are serial rapists: Gregor Clegane, Ramsay Bolton, Euron Greyjoy, Craster; even Tywin Lannister, Roose Bolton, and Petyr Baelish have raped or enabled the rape of young women and girls. When the age of the victim is specified, she is often a preteen/young teenager to make her rape even more evil. The lone exception is Joffrey Baratheon, and that is only because he is 12 (he still molests Sansa repeatedly). Fandom rightly criticizes GRRM using sexualized violence against women as shorthand for “irredeemably evil” or window dressing for a dark fantasy. Yet when Aegor, a character who shows no sign of being a sexual predator (look at Shiera’s SSM, the Dunk and Egg books, and Yandel’s commentary on Aegor’s anger at Bl00draven: one-sided Aegor/Shiera has even less evidence of being real than Daemon/Daenerys), needs to commit villainous actions, some in fandom fall into the same trap as GRRM and imagine him raping women.

Then Yandel tells us that Daemon “agreed to wed his eldest daughter Calla” to Aegor shortly before the Rebellion. As Calla was not a triplet of his eldest sons Aegon and Aemon, the oldest she could possibly be was 11, still a child even by later GRRM standards. The phrase “agreed to wed” is at most a promise; it’s not an official betrothal, it’s certainly not an actual wedding, and it’s absolutely not a consummation. If it had been a consummation, that certainly would have been mentioned, as Yandel has repeatedly recorded rumors just for the purpose of making Daemon look bad (the 14 year old newly acknowledged landless natural son petitioned the king for a polygamous marriage with a princess and an Essosi noblewoman? sure...) Considering Daemon died at the end of the Rebellion and Aegor was now a landless, penniless rebel dependent on his goodsister Rohanne’s mercy, and how the Blackfyres needed to find more allies, I think any talks of marrying Calla was silenced. She married someone else, whereas he remained a bachelor for life and championed the cause of Haegon and his son Daemon III (not necessarily the others, as seen with Daemon II and Aenys, and he did not crown any of Daemon III’s brothers). 

Whatever I headcanon, 2018 GRRM’s comment that he doesn’t think Aegor had any offspring pretty much puts the nail in the coffin of Aegor having consummated any wedded relationship, let alone with Calla. If a male character is promiscuous, GRRM raises the possibility of them having sired natural children; with Aerion Brightflame in Lys, and Brandon Stark in the North, and even Tywin Lannister, he says, “I suppose they could’ve sired bastards” (or in Tywin’s case, gives a non-answer). That he gave a straightforward NO regarding Aegor’s potential children indicates that he feels it would be out of character for Aegor to have a sexual relationship, whether in marriage or outside of it. I hope that when people headcanon Aegor as a serial rapist, they take GRRM’s comments and fandom criticism of sexual violence to heart.

My point is that GRRM is wildly inconsistent with the ages of his child brides (and grooms): I would disagree to the point that in his earlier works, underaged girls forced to wed old men was universally portrayed as terrible and a feature of a corrupt character. Hoster regretted his actions toward Lysa on his deathbed, but it led to their estrangement and her susceptibility to Littlefinger’s manipulation; Sansa Stark’s marriage to Tyrion showed the breakdown of societal norms under Lannister rule; Jeyne’s forced marriage and immediate consummation to Ramsay moves Theon to try to rescue her. Although the marriage wasn’t consummated, GRRM found it difficult to write the Tyrion/Sansa scene because of her horrific abuse. But then The World of Ice and Fire and Fire and Blood are published and older man/younger woman marriages and relationships are outright romanticized by the authors themselves (Elio Garcia said 37 year old Daemon Targaryen’s relationship with the 16 year old Nettles was a true romance; GRRM said that 56-year-old Alyn Velaryon was the great love of 21-year-old Elaena Targaryen’s life) Perhaps the lack of PoV in these works distanced the male writers from the female characters’ emotions and allowed them to envision Rhaenys (16)/Corlys (37), Corlys (61)/Marilda (17), Thaddeus (56)/Floris (14), and Aemma (11-13)/Viserys (16-18) as mutually romantic couples with sympathetic men; but then in the same works the authors use forced relationships with young girls to villainize other men Unwin Peake (daughter died in childbirth at age 12) and Aegon II (was receiving a blowjob from a 12 year old when his father died). The double standard seems to imply that a teenage girl can consent to a relationship with a man old enough to be her father/grandfather if she is genuinely in love with him, which is disturbingly close to real-life defenses of statutory rape. I hate the way that the supplemental material has suddenly decided to defend these couples with “the girls wanted it”, and I can only hope this doesn’t start appearing in the main series that people actually care about.

One type of underaged pairing seems to have a consistent portrayal: child grooms don’t seem to be granted the same mutually happy relationship as child brides. Both Viserys (12) and Larra’s (19) and Androw (17) and Rhaena’s (25) marriages ended in tragedy (and death, in the case of the latter). This makes me...unsettled when thinking about how the authors will write Daemon (14)/Rohanne (older). But to stay within the bounds of your question, I don’t think they will depict an Aegor/Calla marriage due to it making little political or characterization-based sense; so fortunately it will neither villainize nor romanticize Aegor. Although an antagonist to the Targaryens, he has consistently took the higher road over Bl00draven and has the potential to be a tragic and multifaceted character.

[radioactive-park]

Dogpoo Petuski Application

IN CHARACTER:

Name: Devin “Dogpoo/Dogtooth/Dev” Petuski - I am fully aware that it isn’t his name, but I can’t take Dogpoo as a name seriously (There will be something in ‘bio’ about that)  Age: 24 years old Gender (pronouns): Cis male, he/him Sexuality: Pansexual? Bisexual? Who knows! Occupation/Role: Owns a butchery type deal. Does alright taxidermy on the side. Goes out hunting regularly.  Location/Faction: Centennial City Personality:  - Devin is at first glance, quiet and introverted. Deciding that, since he lives in the ’big,scary city’, he would rather be a loner and not speak to many people outside work circumstances. This, combined with trust issues is not a fun combo. While he does hate it sometimes, he knows that is what keeps him safe. When he does speak to people however, he does it with the utmost respect and manners. Having manners might just make someone’s day, after all. He always tries to have a very positive outlook, or well, as positive as one could be in the wasteland. Always walking with a smile on his face, but don’t be fooled into thinking that he is naïve or gullible. He is very quick to realize when he’s been lied to. - He can get very protective of who and what he cares about, to the extent that he’d rather die trying than give up what’s being protected. - He keeps his promises and stays loyal to those who stay loyal to him, until given reason not to be. - He has literally no patience for snobby/bitchy types. It is the only time he doesn’t stick to being friendly. If a snobby type enters the butchery, don’t be surprised if he tells you to fuck off.  - Unless you’ve personally hurt him a lot, he will not hold a grudge. He will shrug it off and, you guessed it, not care.  - A brave bastard. He will not even flinch if you pull a gun or knife on him (Unless you’re, as an example, a CC military type). Stupid brave, to put it simply.  - Has slight abandonment issues, but hey, can’t be abandoned if there’s nobody to abandon you. Bio (It’s not up to Gregory’s app’s standard I apologise x-x): Born and raised in Centennial city, where he still lives to this day.

At the time of his birth, Devin was nameless. His parents, back then, were completely clueless on what to name their baby boy. Like most wasteland parents they feared that he wouldn’t manage to live long. That, even when they were living inside the safe walls of the city, danger would still swoop in and take him from them. So, he was simply referred to as ’son’ and ’boy’ to start with.

His parents ran a butchery in the city, a surprisingly successful one at that. One night, when Devin was barely a year old still, his father offered to watch him while his mother was out buying a few things for the house. His father, somewhat careless, left him to crawl around and play with some things while he was busy preparing what would be sold the next day. Devin took interest in the family’s dog, who often stood by in case he could possibly get meat scraps. When the dog walked off to go outside for…business, Dev followed close by. By the time his father realized he was missing, he was just…sitting outside, playing with, you guessed it, the dog’s poop. Can’t really blame him for it, he was just a little kid. A baby. That earned him the nickname ’Dogpoo’. Originally his mother was against it, it was a very silly nickname to go by, but she was reasoned with to accept it. Said that it was only a temporary nickname. They were still unsure whether he would live past the age of 5. Nothing personal or against him, they loved him very much, but with the amount of dangers in the wasteland it was a possibility that he would die young.

That was not the case.

Through the years, to his parents’ surprise, he managed to stay alive. From a young age, he showed interest in following in his parents’ footsteps. So, they taught him everything they knew. Proper hunting, skinning, knowing what cuts are used for what, what to dispose of and watch out for, even things like sewing, reading and a hint of writing. He also learned how to cook a variety of foods from a variety of items, not only meat. He avoided joining the CC’s ranks as a guard or mercenary, rather slowly started helping more and more around the butchery. 

It took him until the age of about 11 or 12 to realize what he is called, and what it was. At 16, he also figured out that his parents weren’t sure that he would live as long as he did, which is why he didn’t really have a proper name. He hated being known only by a dumb nickname purely for his mistake as a baby. He was being mocked for it behind his back, he was sure of it. So he slowly began reading up and figuring out what he would name himself. He asked for suggestions. Wrote down possible names. Anything. If people asked about his name, about ’Dogpoo’, he would say that it was misheard. That it was actually ’Dogtooth’. He stuck with that every time he was asked. While out hunting on his own for the first time, he had his first run in with something that would not die easily by a few shots from a hunting rifle. He wasn’t afraid of it, rather cautious and curious. It wasn’t until he was pinned down, blood streaming down his face from being clawed that he realized he made a mistake getting close to it. He barely made it out alive, and if it wasn’t for the beast seeing other humans messing with it’s nest, he probably would have died right then and there. He still has the scars.  Another time, not too soon after that, he experienced radiation for the first time ever. He could feel it damaging him almost, but he would not be defeated by it. He didn’t want to become a ghoul either from making stupid decisions. This was where he started putting together gasmasks of his own design from old, broken ones he had bought, traded for or found. One was based of a dog, similar to the family dog years back. The other was based off what he called a ’tusk-beast’, a weird animal he saw in form of a broken, ruined statue in the city. Those would protect him to an extent, and hide his face.

Fast forward to 2279, almost 2280. One day, Dogpoo was left in charge of the butchery for the day, while his parents went out for their weekly hunting trip. It was a quiet day, not too much going on in terms of sales. He spent his time removing the guts from the baby gecko who would become the taxidermized mascot of sorts for the place, Steven. It started getting later and later, but rather than fearing the worst, Dogpoo accepted that his parents had possibly gotten lost, or had decided to camp out for the night. He made a promise to himself that he would keep running the family business, rather than closing it for the time being. He knew that they would be proud of him for it. Only recently, a few months back to be exact, he took the day to make it official, that he was named Devin, that nobody could argue. Not even his parents.

Up until this day, though, he is still waiting for their return. Not as Dogpoo Petuski, but as Devin Petuski.

Headcanons: - This boy has never learned to shoot anything other than a variety of hunting rifles.  - Fairly skilled with knives, cleavers and saws, only because of the butchery.  - Has a huge claw scar across his face from getting attacked by some creature while out hunting. Very self-conscious about it.  - He tends to pay others for meat, just in case it runs out or he couldn’t find anything on his own. He doesn’t care what type of meat it is, as long as it’s still semi-edible and not completely toxic it’s fine.  - Strong distaste for human flesh, but will sell it under names such as ’Squirrel-on-a-stick’ or ’Iguana bits’. What you don’t know won’t hurt you. - The uses of the gasmasks: The dog one is worn when working. The elephant one is worn when out and about, either hunting, scavenging, or whatever the case might be. It is very rare to see him in public without the masks. He wears them for various reasons - Protection against radiation, to hide his scar and to hide his embarrassment for being called and known as ’Dogpoo’ for most of his life.  - He goes by ’Dogtooth’ around strangers, such as butchery customers and traders. Only once he feels he could trust the person, or the person knows his name, he’s okay with going by ’Devin’.  - It is unknown how he keeps the place cold. He doesn’t even know. Wouldn’t catch him complaining, though. - He literally has no idea about anything or anyone outside of the CC and the small radius around it where he hunts.  - He has been trying to perfect his taxidermy technique. His only successful one so far has been a baby gecko. He stands in the corner next to the door of the butchery. Dev calls him ’Steven’. - Dev can read numbers and do basic equations (add, subtract, multiply, divide). He keeps a small notebook in which he writes down things such as expenses, money made for the day, how much he has to pay people and so on.  - No, the money made is not kept at the butchery, nor does he keep it on him. So don’t even try to rob him. - Will try to befriend anyone and everyone. Very friendly, even to those who are not friendly towards him…. In most cases.  - Seems to speak with a slight Canadian accent.  - Not afraid to get dirty - No matter if it’s mud, blood, or anything else. - This boy hasn’t had a decent haircut since he was born. When it gets too long, he cuts it himself. Send help. - He sticks to the laws, rules and regulations of the city to make sure he doesn’t get into trouble.  - He is a pretty decent wasteland chef and yes, he will make you food if you ask him to. (Once again, if something needs to be changed, I have no problem with doing so)

[newmorenograd]

Lyosha took stock of what dignity he had left. All told, it wasn’t much.

He wasn’t shackled. But there were four Iscan guards with their rifles trained on him, which was just about the same thing.

They had put him in the best uniform the Witch Corps had to offer, but even the best uniform in the Witch Corps had spent 11 years being dragged through blood, sweat, and muck, and looked like it. There was a bullet hole above the right pocket where the coat’s previous owner had met their end, and there were spell burns at the hem. Lyosha felt like a drab moth lost in all the foreign palace’s decadent color.

These cold-blooded fishes were fond of gilt and jewels. His current prison was just an antechamber to the throne room, and yet every surface glittered. There were glinting runes pressed into frames of the military portraits that hung on the walls of the eight-sided room, and into the bases of the lights too, silver and gold writing a language he could never hope to understand. It was mesmerizing for someone from Rat country where carved wood and thread was as much decoration as anybody needed. Even the cats in Krovia did not have this much excess on display; say what you want about them but at least they kept their dogs in kennels.

His uniform hid the seal they had inscribed into his neck that kept his power tied close to his bones, tight and coiled and ready to drop like the pin on a rifle. No doubt they would force him to wear Iscan clothes — low-cut tunics, water tones — but at least for a few minutes he could still appear to be what he once was: Voronin, the Crow, the Carrion Eater, the Death Omen.

But the truth was they had stripped him of his names. For without magik he was not Voronin. And without the dirt of his nation under his nails, how could he be Rodinovich, son of the soil?

On the long ride up to the palace, Ambassador Juliya Fydorovna had turned to him.

“In this country, they only have one name. You will be Aleksey and Aleksey only, do you understand?”

So they had taken even Lyosha away from him.

He had nodded in acceptance because he understood duty. He had served his country faithfully in war, and he would do so in defeat too. And this unnaming, this additional kick in the balls, was just another reminder of what they expected from him. He would serve, nameless and powerless, even if he hated what they asked.

Still he could not force himself to make eye contact with the paintings of fish kings and their many victories on the wall, or the golden saints set into niches in the wall, or even with Fydorovna and Utkin who had brought him here and were nominally his comrades. He looked only at his scuffed boots and the sea-bright carpet, which lay beneath them like a fragment of river captured in wool.

He was not sure what the signal was, but there must have been one for suddenly Utkin was pulling him to his feet and pushing him out the door. Still he did not look up. His boots were joined by Fydorovna’s gold-spurred heels. Somebody — perhaps Yulya herself — had thought to carve tiny human livers into the gold. Lyosha wondered if he was the only one who had ever noticed them before — a whispered hint of what animal she truly was.

He looked at those tiny human livers while Utkin pushed him down to his knees on the pooling river of the dais carpet. He did not want to — would not — look up into the eyes of the Asfornholt king and the Asfornholt boy.

Fydorovna was speaking, and Lyosha could barely understand a word. She may have been cut from Krovian rock but she spoke with fishes well enough. He recognized his name — his full one, Aleksey Rodinovich Voronin. He recognized other words that were his, Carrion Eater or something similar; he had heard soldiers yelling it out in their strange toneless language, warning others that he came near. A war rat had no need to understand what other war rats were saying; they could eat each other well enough without it.

None of this made sense at all. He knew, in the manner one knows supply lines and troop movements and one’s own men, why they had lost. But he had not believed it would ever happen. Krovia was old. Magik ran in the red Krovi rock that served as its veins. Maria Morenovna had raised the old capital to the specifications of War herself. Lyosha had danced death into the world each day knowing deep in his bones that an army of rats would never lose to cold-blooded fishes with pale eyes and no witches at all.

He did not understand why he was kneeling here, in the throne room, like he was a dog about to be given to a new master. He was a dog — a hound of the state — but that was besides the point. He had never thought that a master who had put so much training into him would barter him away.

The conversation lulled and suddenly Lyosha could sense not only the eyes of the full court on him but the eyes of the royals as well. Perhaps he was expected to say something.

He looked slowly. The king was sitting on his throne, ensconced by jewels and icons of their gods. The prince was standing before him, one step down, with an expression like ice refusing to melt in mid-summer. He looked unhappy. He looked pale and fragile. Lyosha could snap him in half even without magik.

If he did, the Iscan guards with their rifles would shoot him dead in seconds. He did not want to die. He wished he could do his duty without having to kneel before the victors.

He swallowed all his hate for Isca and for the fish king’s family into his mouth and he spat, “the Three Ninths Kingdom will live forever in my blood.”

Utkin kicked him in the side. His steel-capped boots connected with a rib. Lyosha grimaced but he did not flinch. It would not be the first time he had broken that particular bone. He was very good at not flinching. If you were a commander of men you could never flinch.

“Be good, Vovochka,” the ambassador said with a condescending lilt. Lyosha almost laughed. Calling him Vovochka was almost admitting he wouldn’t be good — Vovochka in the legend certainly never was.

The ambassador smirked at the prince and answered a question Lyosha had been in too much pain to hear. Lyosha turned to watch the prince’s reaction. He looked like he’d never seen a real soldier in his life. He looked a little like he might puke, like a green cat recruit on his first day in the killing field with the rats.

“Get him up,” the ambassador barked to Utkin. She spoke in Rat so that Lyosha could know what was coming. Utkin got one hand around his back and pulled upward; Lyosha did nothing to help. That was petty — Utkin was a good couple inches shorter than him and, after supporting Lyosha’s weight, he would hurt in the morning. Revenge came in small, cold bites.

The prince was before him now. Lyosha had to look at him. The man’s eyes were light, not the winter pale that light eyes were in the Tsardom, but summer green like forests at their most lush. They said the devil made the forest. They said he filled it full of danger.

“Going to give me another scar?” Lyosha asked, voice full of venom. He had more than one of course, but he would never need another. The fish soldier who had caught him across the face with a bayonet at the Battle for Mama Vogg had seen to that. “Or do you just want to look at what a bad job your witch-killers did?”

The fish king said something and the court laughed. They laughed with the king but they laughed at Lyosha’s predicament. A crow stripped of his feathers must have been funny to a court of people who had only known scales.

The prince did not laugh. He was looking at Lyosha like one looks at a sharpened axe. Lyosha supposed that if you had never seen combat, having a war dog on a leash might make you seem like you were in control. He supposed that, as a kept decoration, he was meant to allude to unknown depths of power.

He wondered if the prince had any of those.

The prince opened his mouth and Lyosha almost laughed when what came from it was Krovian and not Iscan. It was a funny and antique sort of Krovian, like Cat but even more stilted. The words were obviously meant for Lyosha but he could not understand them at all.

“You’ll have to be cruder than that if you want me to understand,” Lyosha said to him. There was no venom in that; it was it a fact. Lyosha could neither read nor write anything but the Soldier’s 300; it was more likely he spontaneously learn to fly than he would ever learn Iscan to this pompous bastard’s standards.

There was some fluttering of words, like the sound of birds taking flight, that Lyosha did not understand and did not want to. The result was that the prince stepped away to receive a low wooden box inset with abalone shell. He opened and produced a heavy golden ring. It was ugly as the devil’s ass, but Lyosha didn’t know what else he had expected.

This time Utkin translated for him. The prince wanted him to turn and kneel. Lyosha did so without argument. He knew what was coming. He was to be collared like a hound in front of all these jewel-bright people.

Perhaps the prince was not thinking of it that way — a collar for the married was an Iscan custom, so surely it had some desirable meaning — but Lyosha’s mind could not move beyond its resemblance to a shackle.

He felt it click around his neck. Its gold-plated surface was cold and heavy. He swallowed, and it shifted with the movement of his throat. He would never be free again. If he was a good dog and did as he was bidden, he would live out the rest of his days on a golden leash in the palace of his conquerors. If he was not good, if he followed the implicit order he had been given and killed the prince and the king, danced death into their lives, then he would be shot dead where he stood. He would live a captive or die a martyr.

All he had ever wanted to be was a good soldier. All he had ever wanted to was survive.

He sat with his head bowed for a long moment and thought. In Krovia you were married the moment the marriage price was paid and you exchanged your tokens with your sweetheart. A party might precede or follow, but that exchange was all you needed. Peace was his marriage price. This collar was his token. He was married now.

Slowly, he turned to his husband, prince of Isca, still on his knees. “Is there a collar for you too?” he asked.

The collar they handed him to place on his husband was nothing like the one he was wearing now. Lyosha could have broken this delicate thing in his hands as easily as one crushed a butterfly’s wings. It wouldn’t take him any strength at all.

Then they would have to find another collar for his husband; this whole travesty would be delayed and he could pretend for another few hours that he was free. But pretending was all it would be. He was already shackled.

He stood and buckled it gently around the prince’s throat.

Unlike the rest of the Iscans, who wore loose-fitting tunics and low-cut jackets, the prince’s clothes covered his neck. He had to adjust them so Lyosha could place the foreign collar on properly, and in doing so he revealed the gleaming gold and turquoise seal that kept him from ever having any magic. Lyosha hadn’t been able to look at the one they placed on him — wouldn’t have been able to stomach it even if he had — but he couldn’t imagine they had inked him in gold.

So much for finding a rat husband — someone he could dance with, or weave with; someone who knew the value of rock and how to braid hair in peacetime.

Lyosha’s hands dropped uselessly to his side. He did not know what to do with them. He did not know where to go. The ceremony was over but he had lost control over his own life. He did not get to decide when to leave or what he wanted to do. So he stood there, an awkward, ashen stain on present company.

He turned to the ambassador. “Is it done?” he asked. She was not a rat: too clean, too much money in her pocket. But she served with rats and could understand them. She would understand all his unasked questions.

“It is done,” she answered him. “He has accepted the gift; you go where he tells you.”

“Goodbye Rzhevsky,” Lyosha said to her.

She scowled at him, “Goodbye, Vovochka. Good luck.” And though her lips were twisted her voice held no malice at all.

next →

[the-beastslayers-queen]

A Dangerous Game: Chapter 11

Chapter 11 has arrived, and this is the last full chapter of this story. I will be posting the epilogue tonight as a special double feature. Tagging: @queenofthearchitect @biforbecky2belts @writtingrose @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @mox-made-me-do-it @sassyspacedust @sammyfireheartashryver @jeffhardyenigmawwefan @afauss2009 @calwitch @romans-babygirl-wwe @finnsauroraborealis @accidentalsethrollinsblog and @romansrgn My tag list is still open to newcomers and I will be working on new fics and filling requests very soon. Enjoy!

It has been a week or so since Drew has held us here in Glasgow Kiss. My leg is being held together with a rigid splint and I’m bound to this chair 24/7. I’ve barely had enough to eat and I’ve been given the bare minimum of water to keep me from dehydrating. I was getting so worried for the health of my baby. I was terrified that McIntyre might force me into a late miscarriage or just cause permanent damage to my baby that she’d be disabled or stillborn.

Finn where the fuck are you? Seth and I need you. Your niece needs you.

Finn

I finally got everyone together and figured out that Drew went to ground at Glasgow Kiss. His whole crew has been far too silent. That means they’re there with him, holding my sister and brother-in-law prisoner. I knew I’d need all the help I could get to break in there to free them.

I had managed to not only get the Elite on my side, but I also managed to bring in the Undisputed Era. I buried the hatchet with them and I offered to make sure Miami stays in their care and no one moves in without their permission.

“Bálor,” I looked up from my desk, looking over the blueprints of McIntyre’s crown jewel to figure out the plan of attack. There I saw Hunter and he was ready to go to war to save his son from McIntyre, “You’ve studied that blueprint a thousand times since you came back from Iowa. We need to get our asses into gear. Seth and Cat and their baby have little time left. They could all already be dead by now.”

“I’m as worried and hungry for blood as you are, Hunter,” I looked up at him, the fire burning in my eyes, “But we need to go in with a plan of attack and have a plan of escape once we find them.”

“If I know Seth as well as I think I do,” Hunter leaned over the blueprint with me, “He’s already trying to get an opening to break out of there and get to Cat. He is my son after all.”

Seth

It’s been the same damn routine for the last week or so I’ve been stuck here under McIntyre’s thumb. I’m pulled out of my cell, beat in my ribs, and then dragged upstairs to be tortured some more in front of Cat. And today was no different.

Joe was having fun beating into my ribs like usual, but when he performed his signature Cocina Clutch, he dropped his weight sideways and I felt a tearing in my knee. I went down screaming in pain.

“Stop it, please,” I heard Cat scream. My vision started to fade to black as I felt Joe crush my torso between his legs as I tried to suck in as much air as I could.

Cat

I had to watch again as Seth was beaten in front of me. I could hardly recognize him anymore. Both of his beautiful brown eyes were swollen into slits from how many punches to his face he’s received. He had several cuts on his nose and cheeks from the hard hits from Joe’s stiff jabs. His lip is split and so swollen it’s hard to see his mustache anymore. I think he has a couple chipped teeth too.

Now what’s worse is he’s out cold and I think Joe messed up his leg. As soon as Seth was out cold, I fought hard against my bindings. I wanted so desperately to go to his side and cradle him in my arms. I wanted to take the pain away the only way I knew how. This was heinous and cruel. We did not deserve to be treated like this. I was going to see to it that once I was free I was going to end McIntyre and Joe for what they’ve done to us.

“You sick bastard,” I screamed at Joe as he smirked over Seth’s unconscious body, “I’m going to kill you!”

“Shut up,” Joe charged over towards me and slapped me hard across my face. I spat out the blood that pooled into my mouth right into his face, earning me a swift stab of a knife into my right shoulder, right into the scar from when I had gotten shot what feels like so long ago, “That’s what you get for betraying my man Drew.”

“Joe,” I looked up to find Shaemus standing behind Joe, “Why don’t you take a break. I’ll look over the punishments of Rollins and Bálor.”

Joe left Shaemus alone with myself and Seth. I glared at him, waiting for him to start torturing me. Instead he handed me a razor blade. I looked at him confused.

“Shh, don’t say a word and keep that hidden,” he whispered to me, “I’ve been a plant of your brothers. I was away in Ireland when they took you and Seth. I’m trying to get word out to Finn to get here to save you. I’m going to plant a bobby pin in Seth’s hair so he’ll be able to break out of his chains to help with the plan. I’m going to make sure you get out of here alive and that your baby is unharmed, okay. Please trust me, lass.”

I shifted the blade he gave me up into my sleeve and I watched as Shaemus put a bobby pin into Seth’s bun where it was out of sight of anyone. Seth began to stir and recoiled once he was able to see Shaemus standing over him.

“Relax Seth,” Shaemus whispered, “I’m on your side in all of this. I just stashed a bobby pin into your hair so when you get locked up tonight, you can escape and get into the security room and shut down the alarm system. I’m telling Finn to attack tonight get you and Cat out of here before more damage can be done to either of you.”

Seth

I took in Shaemus’s words as I let my gaze shift over to Cat. There I saw she had fresh blood on her face and on her shirt. That was when I saw that she was stabbed right in her scar on her right shoulder, right where Strong had shot her back in Miami.

“Why help us,” I asked him, groaning in pain from my right knee and my ribs along with all the other damage I’ve suffered since being dragged here, “You’re in his damn clan.”

“I’m a plant sent here by Finn,” he replied, “I was in Ireland when everything started. When I came back I told Finn where we had you two and to get blueprints to know the layout of the club so they can find you both quickly. I’m going to have Finn attack tonight.”

“So you can ambush him and force him and my father to watch us die,” I asked him, not trusting him for a second.

“Seth for fuck’s sake,” I looked over to Cat as she was struggling through her pain, “We need you to break out of your cell tonight and get to the security room to shut down the alarms. That way Finn and Hunter can get us out of here. I can’t keep going on like this. I’m going to lose our baby if McIntyre continues torturing me.”

I finally nodded and accepted Shaemus’s help. I mean I was going to have to learn to trust him in order to save my family from McIntyre.

“Escape your cell tonight,” Shaemus ordered, “I will have Finn and Hunter ready to bust down the doors and get you both out.”

That night, I was locked up like normal. I waited a few hours before I attempted to fish out the bobby pin from my hair. It took me several tries, but I got the bobby pin and I picked the lock on my right wrist, freeing myself easily. I then freed my left hand and I was off to the races. I managed to get the door to my cell open and snuck quietly through the hall. I saw some nameless jobber that was under McIntyre’s employ and grabbed him quickly and snapped his neck. I couldn’t risk being caught.

Once I was done with him, I made my way upstairs and found Shaemus waiting for me. He put a finger to his lip and gestured for me to follow him. I obeyed and he led me right to the security room. From there, he took the liberty of knocking out the guard stationed there and locked the door once we were in and clear.

“Alright make it quick,” Shaemus commanded, “There’s no telling how long this fella is going to stay out.”

I simply nodded and got to work on hacking into and shutting down the alarm system. I did not want to give McIntyre the chance to stop Finn and my dad from rescuing us. I wish I was as good of a hacker as Cat, I knew she’d have this down way faster than I would, but I had no idea where in the club she was being held.

“Once I do this I want you to help me find Cat,” I looked over towards Shaemus as he made sure his gun was ready and loaded, “I don’t want her to be left behind.”

“You got it,” Shaemus pulled out the gun from the security guard’s holster, “I’m sure you know how to work this.”

“You bet your ass,” I told him, “And I’ll make sure to pop one into Drew.”

Finally the alarm was down and Shaemus send out a text to Finn to let him know it was time to come in to take the fight to McIntyre and get us out. Shaemus led me out of the office and I saw my dad come running towards me with Dean and Roman hot on his heels.

“You look like shit, Uce,” Roman grimaced at seeing me so banged up, “They did quite the number on you.”

“No time,” Hunter spoke up, “We need to help Finn find Cat. Do you know where she could be?”

“No but if I had to venture a guess it’d be McIntyre’s office above the dancefloor,” Sheamus answered, “I’ll go find Finn and lead him there. You guys go on ahead.”

I led the way with my dad and brothers up to Drew’s office. When we arrived, Drew knew we were coming and had Corbin and Ziggler waiting for us. I wasted no time in popping them both in their kneecaps to get them out of the way. Dad opened the door and I saw Drew holding Cat to him, the barrel of his gun kissing her temple. She looked absolutely terrified.

“Let her go, McIntyre,” I sneered at him as I pointed my gun at him, “She’s not yours anymore. She was never yours.”

“I will not let you take her,” he shouted back, “She was promised to me. If I can’t have her, no one will.”

“Shoot him,” Cat begged, “I trust you, Seth.”

I opted not to shoot him. Instead I moved closer. I inched closer and closer as Roman and Dean took up my sides to try to prevent Drew from getting away from me. Once I was close enough I grabbed onto Cat and ripped her from his grasp. That was when I heard a gun go off. I looked down at my stomach and I saw nothing but red.

“Seth,” I heard Cat scream.

Cat

Drew shot him, he really shot Seth. I grabbed hold of Seth’s gun and I drew it on McIntyre. I whipped it in his face, dazing him. I then stepped on his hand, putting all of my weight into it. I ended up crushing his hand and breaking his grasp on the gun. I kicked it away and I stood over him, ready to shoot him.

“Am le bás, soith,” I sneered before I pulled the trigger.

Drew became lifeless and I fell to my knees as Finn came running into the room. I turned around and saw Seth lying in Roman’s arms.

“Stay with us, Uce,” he begged, “Your wife and kid are going to need you.”

“Seth,” I crawled over to him and took hold of his hand in mine, “Please don’t die on me. I beg you, please stay with us.”

Seth

I woke up and groaned in sheer pain. I felt like my whole body was on fire. I looked around and saw I was in a hospital bed. I felt like absolute shit. I also couldn’t believe I was alive. I remember getting shot, but nothing else. I continued to look around until I spotted an all too familiar face. Mom.

“Seth, baby,” she cooed as she saw my eyes fixate on her, “Oh good you’re awake. I have to tell your father. We’ve all been worried sick.”

“Mom,” I croaked out, grimacing in pain, “Where’s Cat? Is she alright? The baby?”

“Oh hush now,” she chided, “They’re both okay. Cat is up in the maternity ward for monitoring her and the baby. Once we’re able to, I’m going to help you go up to see her.”

“Is McIntyre gone,” I asked, not remembering anything past getting shot.

“Cat killed him,” she replied, “Nailed the bastard right between the eyes. Your father and Dean would not stop talking about how badass she is.”

“How bad off was I that I had to come here,” I asked.

“You were in very rough shape,” she answered as she stroked my hair, “You were bleeding out from your gunshot wound so we had to rush you here. You had surgery to repair all the damage done to you while under captivity.”

“What about the rest of McIntyre’s clan,” I asked, “What happened to them.”

“They were all arrested when Breeze and Dango came in with the calvary. Shawn presented Cat’s rape kit to make sure Ziggler and Corbin got burned and locked up for a very long time,” she replied, “Now I’m going to see if it might be easier to have Cat come down to see you. You rest easy, okay. I’ll get Dean and Roman to sit with you while I’m gone.”

Cat

When Stephanie told me Seth was awake, I was overjoyed. I was okay, I had stitches everywhere and I was checked thoroughly to make sure the baby was okay. Turned out our daughter is a little trooper and was going to be just fine. She suffered no damage or ill affects which made my heart rest easy. My doctor said it was okay for me to go but to come back if anything changes for me.

I made it down to Seth’s room and I found Dean and Roman talking with Seth, going on and on about how things are going to change now that Drew was gone. I knocked lightly on the door and Dean and Roman both looked at me in my wounded glory. I had to have a moonboot on over the cast I had on my leg from when Drew broke it, I was lucky to be able to walk at all with it.

“Your old lady is here, Seth,” Dean joked, “It’s good to see you in one piece, doll face.”

“We’ll leave you two alone,” Roman guided Dean out of the room and I took a seat on the bed next to Seth, taking his hand in mine the moment I was settled.

“We’re free,” Seth murmured as he brought my knuckles up to his face so he could kiss them, “Now we can live out our lives without having to look over our shoulders.”

“I know,” I smiled, “I have some news for you.”

“What is it,” he asked, “The baby is doing really well right?”

“Oh she’s doing just fine,” I smiled at him as he blanked for a second trying to process what I meant, “We’re having a little girl, Seth.”

“Our own little princess,” Seth released my hand and rested his on my belly, rubbing it gently, “She’ll be a total badass like her mom. I can just see it now. She’ll be beating up all the little boys in school.”

[bigeloo]

I'm gonna be finally home in ~11 hours!

Or 9 if I adjust for the timezones

Either way Hoot, this nameless bastard and a few other plushies (+ 2 special bapies 👀) are going w/ me directly, only few were a bit too big to be safely put in my bags (or keep them within dimensions) and have to be shipped off with my clothes instead.

Anyways, sorry for being lacking with my art for these 2 weeks, I hope y'all understand

[deputy-sarah-sux]

can i be a psycho and your worst nightmare by asking ALL the writers asks?

You are a demon omg. I love it though this was so much fun to do.Since you didn’t specify fic specifically for some of these questions I’m just gonna write about The Devil Has Come for all of the “in xxx fic” asks.

Answers are below since this is such a long ask :):):)

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction? 12/13 it was between 7th and 8th grade and it was all anime fanfiction

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one?Far Cry 5, RDR2, Assassin’s Creed, DC, Marvel, Fallout, Skyrim, Preacher. Far Cry 5 is definitely my favorite to write for though

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer.Personally, I prefer OC’s, with OC’s I can build their character, give them a personality and growth. I like shaping the character as the world changes based on their actions

4) What is your favourite genre to write for?Action or romance unless I totally misread that question

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi-chaptered stories, which would it be and why?The Devil Has Come!!! It was my first in the Far Cry fandom and it’s my baby. I love all the characters and the world that I’m building. It’s got action, romance, some twists, it’s exciting

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why?If we’re talking things that I’m currently writing and enjoy writing then I guess Bridges only because it’s the same characters as TDHC just in an AU form so I’d survive without it.

7) When is your preferred time to write?Night, 10pm on basically.

8) Where do you take your inspiration from?Everywhere really? TV shows, movies, video games, other fics

9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote?So far my favorite scene that I wrote in TDHC that has been published was either the confrontation with Rook in Chapter 11 or Jacob finding Sarah in the hotel in Chapter 8. They were both really fun to write.

10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternate ending in mind?Well it hasn’t been ended yet, but there were two possible endings that I was originally considering. I’m not saying much more other than the ending that I went with is gonna hurt me when I eventually get to it.

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it?Not after posting but I have amended stories due to criticisms. If I’m a bit worried about a particular scene I’ll share the doc with my best lady @farcryfuckmeup and get her opinion. She usually points out things that aren’t great and I go from there. She’s the closet thing to a beta reader that I have.

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why?Sarah!!! She’s my best girl and I love her personality and attitude. In terms of canon characters though I’ve been writing some stuff from Arthur Morgan’s pov and that’s been really fun too. I really love playing around with his sense of self and morality.

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why?I don’t have one yet? We’ll see how the future plays out there. It might be Ethan Seed but I’ve never written stuff for him so I’m not 100% sure.

14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories.Almost every fic name is from a song. The Devil Has Come is from Blues Saraceno’s “The River”, Icarus is from Bastille’s “Icarus”, and I’m not sure where Bridges is from but I’m 90% sure it was a song. The series that TDHC and it’s connected stories are a part of is called Bottom of the River from Delta Rae’s “Bottom of the River”.

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names?I use name generators for modern characters or look up names with a specific meaning. If the character is from the past (ie cowboy times or pirate times) I look up names popular in that century. Sarah’s name I got by looking up popular names with religious meanings and Sarah was on the list.

16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx?I came up with the idea for TDHC by playing co-op with @farcryfuckmeup. It was originally supposed to be a crackfic based on the dumbshit we did in-game. Then in my desperation to pretend that the game didn’t end the way it ends I started coming up with ways it could have gone differently and thus my fic was born.

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on.I have so many wips! I’ll do a few because I’m in a sharing mood.Fallout 4 WIP: “‘You don’t even use power armor, why did you steal so many?’”RDR2 WIP: “Valentine was a crap town with crap people and even crappier whiskey. It was tiny and smelled like mud and horse shit and something else that she was pretty sure was vomit.”Another RDR2 WIP: “Trouble was the bastard was clingy apparently as he was hot on Arthur’s heel.”

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them?Yes, a few. I got bored or I decided to focus on other things. I do intend to one day finish them but who knows

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to?The Devil Has Come!!! I can’t wait to write a sequel and I haven’t even finished the current fic.

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently?Sometimes I wish I’d written a follow up to my judge fic Joseph and his Judge. I’m not totally sure if I like how it ended.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire?@farcryfuckmeup first and foremost, she’s amazing. I also love gwennolmarie and OutlandishWhalesharks on Archive of Our Own.

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it?My anime fics from middle school. It’s still posted and I won’t tell you what it’s called but every time I remember it a little part of me dies.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence?Music mostly but it sometimes depends on the scene. For certain scenes I need silence but for the most part it’s music music music. I have playlists for all sorts of scene types.

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes?I love it, idk if I’m any good at it but I do like writing them.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story?Yes, I’ve been writing some future parts of TDHC and I have cried a bit writing some of it.

26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write?The smut scene in Chapter 10 of TDHC, it was the first smut scene I’d ever published so I was really worried about that and kept rewriting it.

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow?Bit of both I guess. There is a vague outline in my head but only for like the big events, everything in between is go with the flow shit.

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction?It’s not going to be an instant hit. When I first started posting works back in the day I was always so upset when I’d check the next day and see only like 12 people had read it.

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like?Icarus :(   It’s only a baby fic and it’s in a mostly dead fandom but I love it.

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at?No, I love all the attention my fics get.

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec not the answerer)I’m gonna recommend one myself. Since this is a Far Cry blog I’ll recommend a Far Cry fic: come a little closer by lowtides on AO3Also here’s a Fallout 4 fic that isn’t finished but I absolutely love: RAIDERHEAD by TaraTargaryen

32) Are any of your characters based on real people?No real people no. Thomas is a combination of a few fictional characters though.

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten?I’ve gotten a few comments of analysis on chapters I’ve posted and honestly I love that so much. Nothing warms my heart more than seeing that someone not only read my fic but sat there and actually thought a lot about it.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten?Like I said before I haven’t gotten a lot of criticism, but I guess the harshest for me was when I was discussing a character that I had really started to like and my friend (who I was ranting at about him) asked me to honestly think about what he brings to the table. Like is he actually necessary or just a throwaway character that won’t bring much to the story? I ended up scrapping him and putting a nameless character in his place to fill a few of his scenes.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest?I share them with one (1) person and that person is my irl best friend @farcryfuckmeup. Everyone else has to wait until I post stuff I don’t want to spoil any big surprises.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s?It’s a chapter very far in the future for a fic I’m sure you can guess but I won’t outright say.“Against his better judgment, he reached out and grabbed the hysteric woman, tightening his grip against her struggling and pulling her into his lap. He wrapped her in a tight hug until she finally began to calm down, humming softly and running his fingers through blood-soaked hair.“

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written?I haven’t written a lot of funny stuff. I mostly do angsty. But when I was in middle school a wrote a novel where I spent two paragraphs talking about my MC’s hair color and current outfit and I cackle every time I read it. 70 pages or pure cringe, it’s hilarious.

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it.@farcryfuckmeup hmu bitch!also you @onl-you

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person?Third, every now and then I write in first but idk I just don’t like it much.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction?My close friends do

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written?Thomas Moore, he’s a lot of fun to write for.

42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx.I don’t actually have any song fics in the traditional sense. I do however have some fics inspired by songs. I listen to music almost constantly, sometimes a song comes on that gives my fic vibes and I add it to my prompt playlist.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it?@/farcryfuckmeup has but I don’t try too hard to keep secrets when she’s around

44) What is the last line you wrote?“John rolled his eyes and finished unbuttoning his shirt.”

45) What spurs you on during the writing process?This is cliche probably but the readers. I don’t want to leave someone waiting around for the next update forever. I also want to see how things play out myself so my own desire to see the finished product also helps.

46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it?Again, going with TDHC for this. I am writing a sequel currently (I know it’s not done). It’s going to focus on a different character but Sarah will make appearances. I’m also working on a standalone sequel for her but that won’t be posted until the first sequel fic is complete.

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made-up title. What would this story be about?I used a title generator: Hidden Midnight. It’s about a pair of idiots in love, one is a vampire so they can only meet at night and it’s very secretive. The human dies at the end.

48) What’s your favourite trope to write?Forced partnerships. I love it when two characters are forced into a partnership. One of them can’t fucking stand the other but slowly grows to like/love them in secret. If the chill one is in danger the annoyed one freaks the fuck out and does everything they can to get to their partner and afterwards claims they couldn’t care less what happened.

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about?I don’t remember the name of it but I’m pretty sure it was a Supernatural fic. I think it was Destiel (don’t just middle school me) and a high school AU. I’m not 100% sure. It was either that or a Fairy Tail fic and I like to forget my anime days.

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why?Angst. I love fluff and smut but in the end, I always go back to angst. It’s so much fun and there are so many ways to do it.

[dorkyungsoowrites]

Spontaneous Attraction Ch. 11

Pairings: Kyungsoo x You, Past Chanyeol x You

Genre: Fluff/Angst/Smut | Ambiguous AU

Warnings: Drunk sex, underage drinking

Word Count: 3.2k

Description: Rules were made for a reason. It wasn't always to break them.

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The hand on your thigh squeezed as it inched higher. Plush lips moved against yours lazily. Kyungsoo remained seated next to you on the couch, one arm slung around your shoulders. Pulling you closer subtly.

For the past few weeks Kyungsoo had become more comfortable around you. With the secret out he relaxed into himself. He laughed more, talked more about how his days went, made an effort to eat breakfast with you once a week when Chanyeol stopped coming. You had made up with your old friend, but both of you agreed it was best he only see you in group settings for a while. You learned Kyungsoo wore glasses. The next thing you learned was how hot he looked in said glasses. At your insistence that you loved them he began wearing them more around you. He wasn't afraid of speaking his mind. If his schedules changed he would apologize for canceling a date, and one time to make up for it even taught you how to make pancakes. You're pretty sure there would be a stain on the ceiling forever. One of your favorite things, however, was his quick-forming habit of stealing kisses from you.

The first time it happened he said you looked cute. The next, food was on your lip. His explanations grew weaker and more corny as he kept going. The kisses lasted longer, too. His hands slowly started to wander. He would make your head spin and get you worked up only to pull away when your hands slipped along the same path he had on your body. Almost like he was holding himself back. It was like he was testing you. You said you would wait for him to be ready, but his constant almosts made you want him more.

After having a few drinks with you that night he pecked your lips and told you they looked lonely. You both cracked up and joked about how Junmyeon's humor was rubbing off on him. You were tipsy, but the way his eyes swam as they glared at the movie playing on the tv made you think he had less of a tolerance than you. It wasn't even halfway through the film when he had turned his head and kissed the corner of your mouth. It got your attention so he could capture your lips fully.

That's how you ended up with his hand on your thigh, mouth trailing down your jaw to your neck. His tongue darted out to lick your skin before gently nipping it, making you shiver.

"Movie too boring?" you asked in a teasing tone.

"Restless," he mumbled back roughly. When he continued to suck on the same spot you shoved him away lightly.

"You're going to leave a mark." He huffed, but bent his head to do the same thing just above the collar of your shirt. You let out a shaky breath as you rubbed your thighs together, fingernails digging into your palm. Heat creeped down your body and pooled between your legs. He was going to stop soon, and you didn't think you could keep your composure the rest of the movie when he did. He felt your thighs move to press together tightly and lifted his lips to your ear.

"Are you getting turned on by this?" You didn't need to look to know he was smirking. When you didn't answer he gently bit the shell of your ear. "I know you want to touch me." You felt his eyes on you as he unfurled the fist you made in your lap and set your palm on his thigh. You knew you were blushing. Kyungsoo chuckled darkly after you pulled your hand back. "All this waiting and now you're going to make me work for it?"

"You're just teasing me."

"Don't you want to find out?" The hand on your thigh left to turn your face towards him, capturing your bottom lip with both of his. You whimpered in the back of your throat. You'd imagined pinning him down on your sofa and riding him so many times. The alcohol had you caring less if it was only teasing. In a string of boldness you twisted around and straddled his lap, knees digging in to the cushions on either side of his hips. His hands flew to your waist. Kyungsoo broke apart when you grinded your hips down, feeling his growing arousal. He watched you with hooded eyes. You echoed his words.

"Are you getting turned on by this?" You repeated the action a bit harder and heard him curse under his breath. His fingers slipped under the hem of your shirt, lifting the material. You raised your arms for him to finish removing it, the shirt dropping beside him on the couch carelessly. His dark eyes raked in the newly exposed skin before attaching his lips to your collarbone. His movements were more urgent and slightly clumsy. Being further away from where anyone would see a mark if you wore a shirt you let him bite and suck until a deep purple color bloomed. Seeking friction, you kept grinding down onto his clothed member, earning quiet grunts and heavy sighs. His mouth journeyed to the swell of your breast. You were starting to understand he had a thing for biting and marking. You tangled a hand through the hair on the back of his head. There was more to grip since he'd been growing it out. Just this simple friction of his jeans on your core and kissing wasn't supposed to feel this good, was it? God, you felt high. Every sensation doubled across your body. Your skin tingling with electricity. It was hot and it was too much, and you wanted more. When Kyungsoo seemed satisfied with the second mark his lips dragged up the side of your throat. The timbre of his voice was deeper but tender as he sighed,

"Fuck, I want you so badly." Goosebumps followed his fingertips up your spine, stopping at the clasp on your bra. "Can I?" His question came out slightly slurred. A flashback to a similar situation slapped you with reality. What were you doing? You stopped your hips and put your forehead to his shoulder to mutter,

"Shit." Now you were being the tease. You tore his hands from your torso. He looked at you confused as you stood up and put your shirt back on.

"Did I do something wrong?"

"No," you answered gently. "I don't think tonight is a good idea."

"Why?"

"You're drunk."

"It was only a few drinks," he tried to brush off. "I can still make rational decisions. You've seen me when I'm actually drunk."

"Doesn't matter." You were going to stand your ground on this one. "It's--" you sighed. "With the chance of this sounding stupid, it's a rule of mine not to have sex if either me or the other person is inebriated. I'm sorry. I really want to, but I can't." Kyungsoo looked off to the side a minute thoughtfully before nodding.

"Okay." You rejoined on the couch beside him.

"Really?" He nodded. "Thank you."

"I don't want you to feel uncomfortable." You glanced when he tugged on his jeans and readjusted how he sat, the bulge in his pants still prevalent. "Eyes on the tv, pervert." Your gaze snapped to his and he chuckled. You blushed and did what he said.

"If you want to pretend you need to use the restroom you can, um, go take care of that."

"Thanks for the offer, but I have better self control than that. You'll learn." His voice was full of promises. The response had your imagination reeling, swallowing thickly. He smiled proudly at your reaction and went back to watching the movie. Teasing bastard. He was making it hard to take the higher ground.

That rule stood firmly in your mind, however. Not surprisingly, it came about because of Chanyeol. Neither of you liked to bring it up. It's not like you remember very many details of the encounter anyway. You were impulsive, dumbass teenagers drunk at a party.

It was at a house party. You think it was a friend of a friend's brother's college graduation or something. Didn't matter what the party was for. All you were told was there would be alcohol and all your other friends would be there too. This was right before you started dating Chanyeol. The bass downstairs was giving you a headache so Chanyeol took you to a bedroom on the second floor. The entire night he had been glaring at any guy that danced with you. At one point someone was refilling your drink and Chanyeol swooped over with one already handy. He steered you off the dancefloor and once you told him your head hurt he lead you upstairs. You had never been so unbalanced in your life, and it didn't help that Chanyeol's uncoordinated limbs were in the way. You both crashed on the large bed and you set your drink somewhere. Probably the floor.

"Why are you acting so protective suddenly?" You had questioned. You were still oblivious to his feelings at that point.

"I've always protected you from creeps."

"He wasn't a creep."

"He shouldn't have been touching you like that," he grumbled, pouting. The room swayed so you moved with it to keep it still. You poked Chanyeol's chest.

"What? Jealous?"

"He just wanted to fuck you and leave you like some cheap whore."

"Maybe that's what I want," you countered. His eyes grew wide. "I'm sick of being a virgin. It's nothing special to me. I just want it over with so guys stop running away."

"Run away?"

"The second I tell a boyfriend I'm a virgin he gets scared I'll fall in love with him or hurt me or some other bullshit. The older I get the worse it is. It's just a nuisance at this point. I want to know what it feels like to have sex." Chanyeol shifted and cupped your face, holding you still. His dark brown eyes pierced yours.

"I won't run." It took your brain several seconds to comprehend anything.

"What?"

"I'll sleep with you." You pushed his hand off and pretended to laugh.

"Ha ha very funny."

"I'm serious, dove" he replied. "I know you better than anyone, and then it won't be with some nameless stranger. It'll be someone who cares about you." You squinted your eyes at him suspiciously. "You said yourself it's not special to you. It'll be tonight only and everything will go back to normal."

"Aren't you a virgin, too?"

"Yeah..."

"Well great," you said sarcastically, throwing your hands up. "You'll never get me off."

"I've watched porn and read books and stuff."

"Because porn is exactly what you should be basing sex off of." You rolled your eyes.

"Say yes and I'll prove it."

"Fine," you agreed without thinking. Chanyeol crushed your lips to his and pushed you down on the bed. He tasted like vodka. Your memory was hazy on the details of how he got your clothes off, but you distinctly remember how the bass of the music downstairs pounded in your chest. His mouth closed around one of your nipples and sucked the same time he slid a finger inside of you. You arched off the sheets and moaned. Chanyeol groaned,

"You're so fucking wet. Do you want me that badly already?" You felt yourself stretch as he added a second finger, pumping in and out of you slowly. It was remarkably different from feeling your own fingers, and you suddenly understood why your other close friend was so obsessed with her boyfriends hands. You gasped sharply when he placed a tentative kitten lick to your clit. You hadn't realized he moved down that far on your body. "You have to talk to me, dove. Does it feel good?"

"Yes," you whined, hips bucking up into his hand. Trying desperately for him to reach something you didn't know. "More, please Chanyeol." You knotted a hand in his long, soft hair and urged his mouth down. He licked again. His tongue was so warm. "Keep doing that." He pressed his tongue harder to you, moved in circles, then sucked. Your breath hitched and you let out a loud moan with his name. "Fuck, don't stop. Chanyeol. Please don't stop." He continued to work you with his mouth and fingers. For some reason it didn't feel weird. It should have been weird the guy you grew up with had his head between your legs. Instead there was this blast of adrenaline and excitement. Like you'd secretly been wishing for this to happen. Like he belonged with you. Finally he twisted his wrist and hit just the right spot, stars bursting behind your eyelids as you came around his long fingers. Chasing air back into your lungs, you had to pull his head up and grab his wrist to stop him. "Too sensitive." Chanyeol licked the juices from his fingers, never breaking from your gaze. He sat back on his knees while you watched him undo his jeans.

"I am so glad I got to taste you first," he growled. "I already proved you wrong."

"Don't get too cocky. I can still find that other guy downstairs."

"You're insufferably stubborn," he griped. You giggled and squirmed on the mattress impatiently. He kicked off his pants and boxers at the same time then gripped the collar of his shirt and threw it behind him. You stared wantonly at his lithe frame. How his collarbones stuck out, skin stretched taut over his naturally lanky figure. The little 'v' in his hips and the trail of hair from his navel leading to his hard and leaking cock. A smile formed on your lips and you found yourself thinking, 'finally.' Chanyeol collapsed forward, catching himself on either side of your head, bouncing once on the springy mattress. "Are you sure you're ready?" he asked. You nodded emphatically. Chanyeol looked down and guided himself to your entrance, going back to watch your face as he pressed forward. You screwed your eyes shut and breathed deeply, focusing on relaxing your muscles. At first it was like a slight pressure, but your hand snapped up to his shoulder once the head was in, the stretching unfamiliar. He halted instantly and kissed your forehead. You took another deep breath before nodding.

"Okay, keep going." Chanyeol inched further into you, and you made it most of the way before there was a slight stinging sensation and you hissed, nails digging into his chest and shoulder. "H-hold on. Hold on. Give me a second."

"Are you okay? Did I not do enough?" Chanyeol whispered urgently. You opened your eyes briefly to see him biting his lips hard. He was doing his best to control himself. Two deep, shaking breaths, and you let up.

"I'm okay. I'm okay I promise." He sheathed himself fully inside of you before releasing a breath it seemed like he was holding. The way he stretched and filled your walls took you a minute to adjust to. Chanyeol kept still so you could, peppering kisses along your neck and face. He waited patiently for you to slip your hands into his hair and say, "go ahead, Chanyeol." His hips went back until he was almost all the way out before rocking carefully in again. Chanyeol groaned and dropped his face into the crook of your neck.

"It feels so fucking good." On the second thrust the uncomfortableness went away and spread pleasure all the way to your toes. It wasn't like anything you'd felt before. It was a very specific pleasure unique to connecting your body with someone elses. "It's such an overused phrase, but goddammit you're so fucking tight, dove. So tight and hot and wet and--" Chanyeol's voice caught in a high-pitched whine as you wrapped your legs around his waist. It drove him deeper. Your nails ran down his back as his hips picked up speed. You did your best to match each of his thrusts. Chanyeol was panting. "Does it feel good for you too, dove?"

"Yes," you answered easily. "You feel so good, Chanyeol. Fuck me. Harder, please." He didn't hesitate to give you what you wanted. You called out. There was a familiar tightness gathering in your abdomen. But it felt like more as Chanyeol reached deep inside you. It was going to be more. A fuller orgasm? More intense? Satisfying? You weren't sure, but you wanted to find out.

"That's it, dove. Scream my name so everyone hears how good I'm fucking you right now." Chanyeol lifted his head. Deep brown ringed large pupils, lips red from chewing on them so much. How anyones eyes could look so innocent while pounding into you was beyond you. You were far past the dillusion of purity at that point. Sweat gathered on his forehead, eyebrows furrowing. "Is this not enough?" Without warning he pulled out from you. You whimpered at the unexpected empty feeling it gave you. He flipped you around so you were on your knees, leaning forward on your forearms as he re-entered you with a low moan. He hit a sweet spot and the coil in you jerked tighter.

"Fuck! Right there!" Chanyeol grabbed your hips with bruising strength while he continuously slammed into that spot over and over again.

"You like this better? Isn't this what you wanted? To be fucked like a whore?" You keened into the mattress, fingers grappling at the sheets. You opened your mouth to warn Chanyeol of your peak, but it hit you harder than you anticipated. You were yelling into the covers, quaking and tensing through the rattling pleasure, mind blank. A string of curses left his mouth, hips stuttering. That empty feeling was back and Chanyeol came with a load groan. The sheets were stained and a void materialized inside of you as you returned to reality. His hands were pulling you back against his chest, mouth awkwardly moving on your neck, but you were lonely. The emptiness was more than the absence of his cock. Not even his burning skin and the alcohol you consumed was warming you. The room continued to wobble, thoughts swimming, limbs heavy. You don't remember how you got home.

The sick, dirty feeling that encompassed you the next morning was something you never wanted to experience again. It wasn't that you didn't enjoy it. You couldn't pinpoint why you felt nauseous. It wasn't hangover nausea, either. Something didn't feel right inside of you for the next few days. Some pocket in your gut opened up whenever you thought about Chanyeol's hands on you. Like he took something. Like he still had it and wouldn't give it back. You were fidgety and spaced out constantly. He didn't speak to you for a week. Avoiding you whenever he could.

So you made a rule never to sleep with someone if either of you were drunk. You couldn't risk the regret. You couldn't risk the emptiness coming back. Chanyeol had been your best friend and it almost broke you. You cared too much about Kyungsoo to take that chance. Instead you let the movie finish, and called a cab to take Kyungsoo home.

[autumnsidhe]

Answer all the things

D&D Ask Meme

ah fuck. i can’t believe you’ve done this.everything’s going under a read more b/c it’s gonna be long as all fuck

2. Your favorite character that someone else has played.ollie……….. little shit idiot i love him? he and james are both anarchist dumbass but in different ways. brothers in arms.

3. Your favorite side quest.oh christ. there’s no real particular side quests but my fave side plot in general is what i’ll summarise as “alora is a rat bastard.”

alora met a hot rich socialite guy who seemed really into her and she decided she was gonna play the long con on him b/c he might be useful

she and james both agreed to side w/ king clockwork, but when the king actually mentioned it alora gave james a Look™ and he was mad as fuck. he’s still kinda mad as fuck

she decided to be pals w/ a main antagonist (gluto) and didn’t tell us until days after it happened that he’d talked to her in his dreams

alora was told to not tell anyone abt the repugnant’s secret organisation. she immediately spilled the info to everyone

she was told to not mention the organisation’s meeting or anything that went on there. she immediately spilled the info to the motley and literally sent us a photo of the repugnant on his throne speaking to everyone

she was told to keep a specific person away from castle repugnant. she let him waltz right up to the castle w/ everyone else and seemed confused when they said he couldn’t go in

she broke into somewhere w/ gluto and then left him in a room full of very important documents b/c she somehow didn’t think taking him there to begin w/ wouldn’t backfire

the last thing james said to her was literally “i take it back, you’re a stupid shit idiot and i hate you”

4. Your current campaign.random sideplots get to go here this time! most of them are james or ollie b/c we interact the most w/ npcs

james and galant romance sideplot and the sheer amount of wild scenes that have happened as a result (the date, le fway showing up, addy’s dating advice, “ollie, you’re pretty ignorant”, “so you killed your boyfriend”)

ash coaches a baseball team

ollie tries to handle pink drugs, fails to provide any evidence that he’s not the cause

alora helps the repugnant, always immediately regrets it b/c he’s a little bastard man

the gang trying to figure out what’s going on w/ the repugnant’s amnesia

james accidentally making friends w/ a black spiral dancer and being heavily in denial abt why cylus probably got so attached to begin w/ (hint: it’s the anarchy and the horrid rebellious streak)

james nearly sides w/ the main antagonist b/c he’s got the right idea but his methods are fucked

ollie goes to fairy prison, makes friends w/ a vampire and some old sidhe, is currently in the middle of trying to break out

5. Favorite NPC.unfortunately it might be cylus? cylus is like 6 levels of batshit at any given moment and was introduced to us as a nameless dangerous prisoner that galant was holding for some sort of treaty? and james and addy were told to not listen to him for any reason and to not let him free. and of course james let him free. he shifted into a giant 9ft-ish tall war form and then james realised he was really in over his head. upside: he went back in his cell afterwards. downside: he got attached to james. also downside: james didn’t actually get warned that he was a dangerous war criminal until after all this went downthen cylus literally showed up in james’ dream to tell him a few things and warn him that he was planning to escape? and there was nothing james could do b/c “i heard it in a dream” isn’t exactly a solid claim esp when he doesn’t have any sort of future sight. and of course cylus broke outthen james ran into him in the dreaming and james was losing his mind the entire time b/c cylus is an absolute freak and james was stuck walking w/ him for like 2 hours. then like an hour after they parted ways james got flung into a ditch on the edge of town (in the real world) and cylus carried an unconscious james like a sack of potatoes into waffle house and just let him sleep on the table for a bit. then like 3 days later cylus broke into his apartment and made him breakfast.and then james got flung out into the middle of nowhere again for reasons and cylus was there and james had the choice of dealing w/ cylus or being horribly lost in the woods so he chose the first one. and he nearly got caught in the middle of a big werewolf fight that cylus orchestrated. and also nearly got caught in some extremely violent family drama.throughout all of this cylus is acting like he’s james’ best friend and last time they spoke cylus really wanted to do buddy cop stuff! they’re pals! totally! and james wants absolutely none of it but he can’t explode on him b/c he’s a skinny little twink and cylus could snap him like a twig w/ no effort

to summarise:

6. Favorite death (monster, player character, NPC, etc).we actually haven’t had many deaths! the only ones i can think of in game that aren’t random monsters were the old bastard and nor nan, which. were both interesting in their own ways, but nor nan’s was mostly tragic and i don’t wanna get feelsy so i’ll just use the old bastard here.to set the scene: we’re at a fancy party. ash and marike (an npc, he’s an unseelie lord and overall a hell of a time) are off on their own trying to catch chimerical creatures that stole their weapons. marike curbstomps one, meanwhile the other has climbed up onto a curtain rod. the place has really high ceilings. his solution? pick up ash and toss him at the creature. ollie and the old bastard (who owns the house) walk in just as this is happening, and the old bastard sees ash tear down the curtain rod for no damn reason. of course he demands answers. ash tries to bullshit a story abt an entire family of raccoons they were trying to chase outthen the old bastard gets shot in the head. ollie and marike are splattered w/ blood. he hits the ground, ash makes a joke abt “telling his wife the bad news”then he notices his wife is the one who just shot him

7. Your favorite downtime activity.the entire arc’s taken place over the course of 15 days in-game, including downtime. we haven’t had any specific downtime activities per say, but the best moment we’ve had during downtime was when ollie broke into james’ apartment and now he refuses to let ollie anywhere near his apartment complex

8. Your favorite fight/encounter.i’ll stick to generally hostile meetings for this since we’ve only a small handful of solid fights? but it’s either “james nearly dies” or “ollie is a good distraction”

to set the scene for the first one: the hospital chimerically burnt down, so the motley decided to investigate and sneaked in as janitors. james ended up alone down in the morgue after finding a body covered in chimerical burns getting wheeled down there. he checks it out, takes a couple photos on his phone. then the door opens.james starts cleaning and stuff, but it turns out the person who came in (gluto!) was also a changeling and very easily noticed the fact that he’s got really noticeable pointy ears in his fae mien. and of course he starts threatening james. and after he pulls out a massive scythe. james sends everyone an sos but they all get stuck in the elevator. so james pulls a gun in a fucking hospital. and he gets called on the bluff but before he can put it away, in bursts galantgalant starts kicking a bit of ass, and then gluto ripped the (already weak from the fire) chimerical ceiling down on top of them! galant did some shit to lift the rubble off them with little to no effort and james was kinda like “oh no he’s hot” for a second before galant kicked a bit more ass and gluto ran like hell!then he next night galant literally died for james (it’s okay, he got better) and confessed that james is his true love and just. man.

for the second one: there’s 3 assassins after galant. he fucked off to lovescreek in order to avoid them, but when ollie found him, one of the assassins had found him! so ollie joins the fray against this troll (who are like 8′ at the shortest), and after a short bit gluto joined in as well to distract ollie from the main fight! so what did ollie do? start loudly singing “i’ve got a lovely bunch of coconuts” for a chicanery bunk to turn galant invisible. and of course both assassins turned on him and he ended up having to run like hell but when he lost them galant reappeared and was like “well that was fun”

9. Your favorite thing about D&D tabletop RPGs.i’ll keep it real, i’ve disliked every dnd system i’ve experimented w/ and i’m not a fan of most fantasy so it’s unlikely i’ll every actually play a proper dnd game but god… tabletop stuff is just so much fun? mostly the story and the fact that joe is absolutely godly

10. Your favorite enemy and the enemy you hate the most.cylus may be my fav npc but my fav antagonist is definitely king clockwork? ic my very first encounter with him led into him and james talking about their beliefs and ideals for like 2 hours straight and when he was getting ready to leave james was ecstatic that he’d finally met someone who fully understood his mindset. then the bomb dropped that he was the boss of the other antagonists and james was hit w/ this utter horror. and then james considered siding w/ him for a long ass time before eventually trying to kill him to put a stop to everything. yeah. yeahmy fav enemy/antagonist is absolutely gluto b/c he’s creepy as shit. during anyone’s first encounter w/ him i was completely solo and it was horribly unsettling and i simultaneously love and despise him

11. How often do you play and how often would you ideally like to play?we meet once a week! what game we run varies but recently it’s been changeling every week since we’re still waiting on player characters to start hunter the reckoning lmao

12. Your in game inside jokes/memes/catchphrases and where they came from.we have a bunch of them but uhhhhh random ones off the top of my head

“it’s always sunny in coolville” b/c i realised early on that we were going to be up to a lot of dumb shenanigans and it was easy to make it’s always sunny title cards based on each session

#saveduke b/c there was a whole thing at one point where we had to keep him from getting kidnapped. spun off from that are #SaveDukeFromHimself, #SaveGalantFromJamesStupidity and #SaveDukeAgain?

“appearance 4, captivating” b/c dom said it regularly for multiple sessions until his character dirty danced with a hot guy at a party, after which he decided that alora was a lesbian

“does [insert art] let me throw fireballs?” b/c dom wanting to throw fireballs down the street is a running joke but also he unironically asked if primal 2 would let him throw fireballs

“james got norted” b/c he nearly joined the main antagonist, which devolved into “[insert random character] got norted” at the most random times

james and galant touching tips b/c at one point while they were casually talking ollie just started going 👉👈 in the background and james got really mad and flustered abt it so everyone started doing it

“ultra instinct ash” b/c he’s our shaggy and also has done like fuck all nothing productive in game so him going fucking super saiyan to kill the final boss is hilarious

“i got two hands!” b/c people regularly ask why ollie dual wields broadwords

#OllieOllieOxenFREE b/c ollie got himself sent to fairy jail

“i did [stupid thing], can i buy [half related skill]?” like “i attempted murder, can i get chronos 2?” or “i was an assassin in a past life, can i get melee 3?”

“people, let me tell you bout my best friend!” abt james and cylus b/c boy does james have bad taste in friends

14. Introduce any other parties you have played in or DM-ed.uhhh exalted is the only one i’ve been a part of that’s been solidly active, but we’ve got characters for scion for when 2e drops, and i’ve got characters set up for chaos reigns when joe starts the next arc b/c i didn’t wanna peter parker myself into the finale. i don’t remember the rest of the scion crew well enough but i love them

15. Do you have snacks during game times?we almost always grab food on the way there and eat before we properly start

16. Do you play online or in person? Which do you prefer?in person! it’s the only way i’ve ever done it but i’m 🙏 that maricopa gets running online b/c……….. vampire good………..

17. What are some house rules that your group has?the big house rule for changeling is “ run things fast and loose.” joe knows the characters well and what’s on their sheets so we don’t do too much dice rolling except for arts. joe also takes some artistic liberties w/ some things, mainly wayfare and the inanimae, b/c his main goal is to make a good story and he’s sure as fuck succeeding

18. Does your party keep any pets?do addy and duke count? they’re a white rabbit and a beagle. beyond that, addy’s got pet rabbits, and ollie might be feeding a stray cat

19. Do you or your party have any dice superstitions?not really. dom claims that dice rollers hate him but he also keeps using his dice roller rather than pulling out physical dice

20. How did you get into D&D? How long have you been playing?i got into tabletop years ago when harley introduced me to the dystopia rising larp and i decided to check out the tabletop version for more lore. the current tabletop system sucks but onyx path is handling 2e and i’m so hyped for it. at some point a bit later i played vampire the masquerade bloodlines, and it got me into the world of darkness and well. i still love it.as for how long i’ve been playing, uh. around a year i think? i forget when we started exalted the borderlands-ing. i’d been sitting in on the group for around a year before that, mostly getting a feel for things and also we were trying to figure out a good jumping in point for me and i wish i could’ve started earlier but it let me mesh w/ everyone a bit easier and also have an outsider’s viewpoint when it came to certain issues

21. Have you ever regretted something your character has done?oh absolutely, “i fucked up” is the semi-catchphrase for james for a reason. he theoretically has common sense b/c i usually say “this is gonna be stupid/bad” either ic or ooc before i do some shit and well. yeah it doesn’t usually go well but we have fun

23. Do you use premade modules or original campaigns?i think the only thing not original we’ve run since i moved up is strange aeons and maybe a coc scenario? everything else has been original campaigns

24. How much planning/preparation do you do for a game?not too much, really. i sometimes plan out a little of what i’m going to do, but half the time i never actually have the chance b/c stuff moves in a different direction than i was expecting. however i also write the summaries of the shit we’ve gotten up to every session so there’s that

25. What have your players done that you never could have planned for?i’m not a dm but i’m answering this for joe b/c he flat-out admitted that he couldn’t predict what was going to happen in at least half of changeling b/c we’re an unpredictable mess but everything’s come together to make a really interesting finale

30. Are your players diplomatic or murder hobos?answering this one too even tho it’s still a dm question b/c the players themselves are half diplomatic (me, mal, joe depending on game) and half murder hobos (fredy, dom). dom’s been going more diplomatic w/ alora but also she’s so bad at it and it’s wonderful

31. What is your favorite class? Favorite race?classes aren’t a thing in changeling but out of the kiths ouuuuuuuugh i love sidhe a lot. like they’re honestly cool as hell and i fucking love the house lore? i’ll also do houses b/c fuck it, my fav house is beaumayn b/c they have no chill and every bit of house lore they have is brutal as hell

32. What role do you like to play the most? (Tank/healer/etc?)just looking at my trends of characters i’ve got currently (re)built, i have:- the face (james, rex, val)- support (henri, caoimhe, river kinda?)- the antisocial son of a bitch (nomi, neil)- “i’m going to wreck anything you point me at” (hound, oliver, elliot but not by his own choice)- pure chaos (nora, glitch mage)gemma is kinda hard to put into any category b/c she’s babey?

33. How do you write your backstory, or do you even write a backstory?it depends on the character? some characters don’t have backstories (caoimhe, nora), some i’ve fleshed out heavily (james). it’s usually assembled from a bunch of random snippets written over the course of however long. some of it’s heavily thought out, other parts are just kinda arbitrary. i also tend to run some more important chunks past joe or mal just to see how they feel? james being from house gwydion was originally arbitrary and wasn’t really gonna matter (joe himself said it would just be a bit of flavour) then he figured out how to fold it into plot and i’m thriving b/c le fway is wild

34. Do you tend pick weapons/spells for being useful or for flavor?flavour, though use is also a bonus? artswise james currently has naming/chronos/contract, which are all useful in their own ways but also reflect his past lives / him as a person

35. How much roleplay do you like to do?yes. if i’m not able to embrace the character i’m playing is it really that fun? is it really? no b/c when that happens to this group we get the dumbed down version of chaos reigns and i go fucking batshit b/c of the fact that combat takes way too long