#the toxic boyfriend <3

[suffarustuffaru]

otto, doing something with good intentions: are you sure you want me in your life. i bring a lot of trouble you know. and i helped you just for my own benefit. this money isnt mine by the way. so like im gonna give it to you. just out of pity or whatever. no its not my money haha why would it be my money. also we didnt like Murder those people haha why would we do that? they fell off on accident <3 dont worry i lied to the authorities for your sake - i mean. they. um. i told them the truth about what happened hahah. also did i mention already that youre better off without me in your life. and im gonna leave the moment theres danger. just so you know. so like dont be surprised if i leave you. also im not gonna tell you why im doing any of this for you. the reason why is so boring anyway. its not like i care or anything. idiot. but also maaaaybe im kind of the worst person ever oopsies 🫢 and can you stop putting yourself in danger. its.................................. a lot of work for me and totally not concerning me at all. ugh why am i still stuck in this goddamn job. yeah i know i couldve left like a year ago, im staying here because. because. um. well im too USEFUL now the entire place would fall apart without me. who else is gonna do your paperwork huh?? i do it way better than all of you because all of you SUCK ASS at everything around here. no its not like i Care that much. like yeah youre my friends but i already warned you ages ago about the consequences of keeping me around so you deserve me complaining to you actually.

otto, doing something bad: i LITERALLY mean well okay :<<<< this is FOR YOUR OWN GOOD why arent you thanking me on the spot and listening to my advice already. ive never been wrong about anything EVER in my whole life. you should be bowing down to me and kissing my little forehead and telling me im right BECAUSE I AM. im the BEST PERSON EVER right now. i LITERALLY deserve so much better than this. im going to save all of your asses and then youre going to come fucking crawling back to me the moment you need me again, i guarantee it <3 im Extremely useful and youd miss me the moment im gone. right? right. right. im right, right? please notice me and listen to my extremely good advice 🥺 why are you saying its bad advice??? cmonnn stop ignoring me :((( just because im lying to you, keeping secrets from you, manipulating you, hoping everyone else dies for your sake, repeatedly trying to abandon millions of people, etc etc DOESNT MEAN that im wrong and ive Never been wrong. Ever. .......yeah a bunch of people are gonna die, so what? have they tried like, not standing in the way of my goals? 🥺

[theoldkyokodied]

The Allegiance of the Ascended Vampire and the New God of Magic

[gayestcowboy]

guy who gets scared by a rat and jumps into gale’s arms, crushing him

[weepingalaxy]

that's soooooo romantic ~ !! (divorces him)

[kagdowo]

rotates him violently in my head

[vehrabells]

Just thought I’d upload this here, too<3. (Based off headcanons! Cherri’s my favorite so I really love writing for her/exploring her more)

“Lemonade is bitter ‘till you sweeten up the bowl” - Pentious sweetened up the bowl<3

[captainblux3]

long time no see eh. i’m procrastinating a lot recently.

[rusquared]

fic idea for later:

Han Sooyoung's colleagues were, frankly, concerned. Professor Lee peeked over her cup of tea at the young woman slouched over at the adjacent table. If she didn't know any better, she would have assumed that the infamous professor was hungover. But that was the norm for Professor Han. This, however, was something the department knew too well.

Professor Han's phone buzzed on the table and she lifted her head to glare at it. Grumbling something under her breath about "ungrateful assholes" she picked it up. Faint sounds of a young girl's voice leaked from the call and Sooyoung paused her expletive-filled mumbles to sigh and say, "Sure, kiddo."

Assistant Professor Kang, who was the bravest of their little group, piped up nervously, "Everything alright, Professor Han?"

Sooyoung, who had not yet had her morning coffee and therefore did not have her usual flippant attitude on hand, weakly waved a hand.

"I have to take my ex-boyfriend's daughter to the mall today, and my other ex's sister just called to tag along." She spoke as if this was an ordinary occurence (which they suspected it was).

This was getting out of hand. The ladies in the room shared tiny nods as Sooyoung rested her head on the table again.

Professor Han needed an intervention. And better taste in men.

[calikitters]

i wish calypso had more character development instead of just pairing her up with leo and considering them both fixed

[whoblewboobear]

Scott Pilgrim style crack fic where all 7 of Porter’s exes have formed an adventuring party to come kill him for being such a messy partner.

Porter has to fill Jace in so fast because if there’s anyone he needs to help him defeat them it’s his current boyfriend. Which? Can and most likely will backfire because they all have so much dirt on him it’s insane.

Jace is like “hey, babe.. maybe just talk to them? I don’t like the idea of murdering them bc things didn’t work out.” And Porter is just pleading with him, on his knees BEGGING Jace because, to quote John Mulaney, anyone that’s seen his dick or met his parents has to die. Jace PLEASE.

[confundida25]

I dont ship Bakudeku ok??? THE SHOW SHIP BAKUDEKU

[a-star-that-burns-brightly]

(x) Once again I'm going insane over this

[aadmelioraa]

for @jeynepoole 💜

based on this post

[drawingway]

If i go to the House of Hope, free Hope, Kill Raphael to take his lovely armor that i love it, but leave the hammer behind... Will the Emperor still be mad at me? :v

I mean, i AM leaving the hammer behind :')

[rainbow-crane]

so my sister is getting me to watch Cobra Kai while I'm visiting home, right

and look. She warned me about the love square. The old man rivalry. All that good stuff. What she did not warn me of, or rather, was not equipped to warn me of(she's never played DR), was the fact that Mondo Owada is a main fucking character

[theloveinc]

I love ex boyfriend bakugo so much you don't even know

actually i do know because i feel the SAME. my love for ex bakugo is unyielding. endless. forever. and i actually wrote a bunch for him a couple months ago when another anon brought it up but... got scared they'd hate what i had down so i....... put it on the shelf. i'll have to find it maybe... if ppl want.

ANYWAY... like. there is truly just no way to go wrong with him. there is just no universe where he isn't either a depressed, miserable, longing ex or an kind, gentle and regretful one (or some variation of). even when he's angry, it's mostly just at himself for being a douche who managed to lose you, and HOW CAN U NOT LOVE THAT??

it's so ironic bc he's such a prickly pear but... he just loves the hardest out of any + everyone. not that i don't imagine the others and just as caring... but for bakugo, it's almost a religious experience, you know? never a phase or an era or something he just does but a... idek. life commitment? goal? achievement? something to be maintained and treasured? all of the above. EVEN IF he's not that good at it (at first... which is debatable anyway), that's still how he feels.

so when u break up... that can't be the end of things. like really i can only imagine it happening circumstantially, cuz i genuinely think that any issues you bring up with him (aside from work maybe), he'd take BEYOND seriously.

too gruff and private? suddenly he's telling u every single emotion he has and asking if he's being too rough. too anal and uptight? suddenly the kitchen is a mess and he hasn't even noticed. hell, even too busy? he'll do his best to fit a whole evening with u in his schedule (he hates mornings more than anything but takes the ass crack of dawn shift just so u can have dinner together most night)... it's like !!!!!!! + reminds me of that post i made talking about how pro heroes are so hard to breakup with bc even when ur pointing out their flaws, they're so used to constructive criticism, they don't even notice ur being insulting LMFAO😭

that aside tho, i can never imagine a bakugo breakup!au without them... you both back together at some point. even if it's ten or fifteen years later like... he spent all that time trying to get better for u... even if he didn't think you'd really come back. (or, as i was trying to write, you breakup with him and he just... doesn't fucking believe u LMFAOOOOO and shoves his booty back into his rightful place sadjkfhakjdsf)

(and bc i have i-can-fix-him disease, i also like bakugo who went thru a traumatic breakup w/ someone who wasn't u... and then five/ten/fifteen years later, you're the one to teach him to love again. or maybe that's not that unique of me LOL).