#then i split them into individual poems

[dust-to-dustier]

Putting a title on this one was hard ngl but I think I'll settle with it. Anyway hope it is enjoyed :)

QUIET REVOLUTION:

A simple bloom of revolution 

Against harsh cold streets

And greying men,

Is the kindness of the man on the street

Who hands out flyers for the homeless.

The gentle kiss of freedom

Floats upon the wind,

It comes in the form

Of the woman who called the ambulance 

For this stranger.

The lilting tunes of love

Reach the ears

Of the sweet young boy 

Gazing upon a rainbow of people,

 realising he is not alone.

The growing seeds of kindness

Break through old concrete

With the aid of friends

Who stopped to help the old man

With his shopping across the street

The shining spirit of humanity

Burns through the robotic veil

Of a world that seeks to dim them,

With simple acts of kindness 

And the unwillingness to turn their backs

Upon others,

And their unwillingness to blind themselves

To quiet creeping horrors

That fear above all,

The simplistic passions of the people.

[dualdeixis]

[Image description: A poem titled "רַבִּי / رَبِّي" written Friday, November 17, 2023: Rabbī, I cannot praise your deeds. / Rabbī, no weeping moves you. / Rabbī, your justice is wedded to perversion. / Rabbī, your love looks much like your hatred. / Rabbī, the patriarchs have been gilt as idols. / Rabbī, the Temple has been built into a prison. / Rabbī, mixed multitudes have been spat on. / Rabbī, all oneness has been sported with. / Rabbī, ministering angels have been consigned to wailing. / Rabbī, nameless infants have been fed the world’s silence. / Rabbī, your reddened sea has been exiled from shore. / Rabbī, your holy city has been split in two. / But by whom? / Rabbī, shall I say “them” or “us”? / Rabbī, which people is solely yours? / Rabbī, what image is divine alone? / Rabbī, when comes the Hour of Unlocking? / Rabbī, where hides the Place of Its Glory? / Rabbī, why? Answer now. Answer. End image description.]

note 1: as the title implies, "rabbī" may be read as the hebrew word for "a jewish cleric" or the arabic word for "my l_rd" (i.e., g_d).

note 2: this poem is written from an anti-zionist jewish perspective. therefore the question "by whom? / shall i say 'them' or 'us'?" is not meant to dispute palestine as the oppressed party. rather, it is meant to be taken extremely literally, because it is situated in my individual experience: should i—a muslim in the process of converting to judaism, who has been estranged from jewish community and had my conversion delayed because of zionism; who has no personal ties to israel but is nevertheless complicit in its genocidal actions by nature of living in the warmongering USA which uses my household's tax dollars to fund it; who believes that "all israel are responsible for one another" (shevuot 39a)—refer to the oppressors as "them" or "us"?

ways to help palestine:

decolonize palestine (patreon)

samidoun (calendar of worldwide protests)

palestine action

palestine legal

bds movement

e-sims for gaza

more resources

ways to help congo:

list of donations

boycott & donate

ways to help sudan:

list of donations

fundraiser for a refugee family

action against hunger

ways to help armenia:

all for armenia

armenian food bank

artsakh housing fund

armenian assembly of america action center

ways to help other indigenous peoples around you:

learn about whose land you may be living on

[homeofhousechickens]

i agree that people are overly romantic about diprosopus because of the two headed calf poem! imo the beauty of the poem is how short life can be and how peace can still exist in those fleeting moments. its frustrating to see people interpret it in a way that makes them cling to short lives as if a peaceful death is more tragic than living in delirium and pain for hours if not days. they parade the calf around as a spectacle as much as the farmboys in the poem do

I hate when people use the cats who had the same condition as an example of animals with good quality of life because to be honest I don't think those cats did have a good life or a good death and of course they needed their own social media pages. It's just icky how these animals are treated like a spectacle before they are treated like an animal. If that same calf was born with something like a severe cleft palate or one of the other visible brain deformities FHH can cause it wouldn't get the same amount of attention and would probably get euthanized due to the quality of life implications but two faced animals do not get the same luxury and are usually forced to live despite profound brain deformities. They aren't even technically two headed! It's an individual animal that has one brain and it's actually not as rare as you would think since some cows are more prone to producing it then others it's just these animals are typically born dead. True two headed animals are usually twins that failed to split off correctly.

[the-guilty-writer]

Spencer and Rossi-Reid on Valentine's Day

Nobody asked but I know someone out there is waiting for it so here are some headcanons (or are we at a point where we can consider this a canon derivative?) about Spencer and RR on Valentine's Day.

Made with help from the incredible @doctorsteeb

Growing up Spencer didn't celebrate Valentine's day. The first reason is obviously because his parents split up, and sometimes his mom wasn't even aware of what day it was.

Spencer's only real meaningful connection to Valentine's day is Chaucer's Parliament of Fowls, which his mom used to read to him, but the poem means more to him than the day itself.

You'd think Rossi-Reid would have a bad relationship with the day of love as well, considering her father has three failed mairrages, but that only opened the door for Rossi to be the dad of the century when it comes to celebrating Valentine's day.

Rossi loves his daughter more than anything in the world and he wants to make sure that her standards for a man are HIGH.

When she's little he makes it a tradition that he leaves her a card in the morning if he has to go to work and packs her favorite lunch. When he gets home, he asks her to go on a father daughter dinner date and they get dressed up and go to a fancy resturant.

He pulls out her chair for her, waives down the waiter if she needs anything, pays the bill. She's only 5 years old, but he loves his daughter and again, he wants those standards for a man to be high.

When she gets a older and she can appreciate it, she wakes up to a gift instead of a card.

They're nice gifts.

Like REALLY nice gifts.

Diamonds, silver, or gold, always wrapped up in a Tiffany & Co. box with a pink bow.

And of course, they have their father-daughter date.

The year RR stopped ordering chicken nuggets made him a little sad.

One year Rossi was called to take a case. He was going to decline, but RR made him go.

She wants him to be there, but his job saves lives, and at some point that's more important. They can always do dinner some other time.

Of course the entire BAU knew that Rossi went above and beyond for his daughter on Valentine's day, and even though she's the one who told him to go, Hotch still saw that she was sad.

Before his dinner date with Haley, he ran out to the nearest drug store and got RR a box of chocolates and dropped it off on his way to pick Haley up.

He just left it on the porch, rang the doorbell, and left. He didn't even have time to write that it was from him because he was in such a rush.

But RR knew and texted him anyway

"Thanks, Hotch. And don't worry. She's gonna say yes."

"Stop calling me Hotch. Hopefully she says yes."

Haley said yes.

When RR went to college, Rossi would send bouquets of flowers to her and call her that night.

So RR's standards are about as high as they can get.

If you think about the timeline, her and Spencer are married by the time their first Valentine's Day rolls around and Spencer is so nervous about it.

And she's nervous about it too.

RR had a casual boyfriend or two but nothing like her and Spencer (I mean they are married) and she has no idea what she should do for him, what he'd expect from her, etc.

She's honestly freaking out more than he is.

So a few days before, she brings it up in conversation and Spencer freezes.

Then he starts rambling, but RR knows it's his nervous ramble and not his excited ramble so she stops him and calms him down.

And she fully admits that she has no idea what to do either.

So they decide together that for the first year they're going to keep it low-key.

But both of them individually want to make the other feel special.

The day starts casually but Spencer enlisted Gideon's help to keep RR at the office for longer than him.

He goes home and tries to make pasta.

RR tried to make a card with classic Valentine's poems written on it.

By the time RR gets home Spencer has managed to explode tomato sauce in the microwave and severly overcooked two boxes of pasta.

And the card that RR made has coffee spilled all over it.

They're both freaking out until they realize that the other one tried so hard and failed as well.

And they just laugh together.

RR makes dinner and then they snuggle together while Spencer recites poems from memory.

From then on, Valentine's day for them comes in the little things- holding hands a bit longer than normal, lunch break alone instead of with the rest of the team, going home from work early and Spencer reading to RR outloud while she makes dinner.

And gifts are always small things that show how well they know one another- a cardigan Spencer was admiring, the Italian translation of a book that RR loves.

Because even though it's nice to have a day that is a bit more special than the rest, Spencer and RR don't feel like they need a designated day to show or tell one another how in love they truly are.

[telomirage]

hi april!!! 1, 2, 8, 11, 13, 16, 17, 18 and 25 for the fic writer asks? it is a lot of questions haha <3

hi honey <3 now we're even since I sent you a lot of questions 😂

1. Do you prefer writing one-shots or multi-chaptered fics?

I would love to write long, multi-chaptered fics but am cursed to write one-shots. I don't mind though! One-shots are fun.

2. Do you plan each chapter ahead or write as you go?

A mix of both! I think I only have one published multi-chaptered fic? And I split that one up while writing because I realized I needed to do that. But for the chaptered wips, I often do a rough outline of what I'd like to happen in each chapter and then shift things around while writing until they make more sense.

8. Do you prefer the beginning, middle, or end of a story?

The middle 😵‍💫 endings can be challenging.

11. Link your three favorite fics right now.

oh no 😭 I can't choose, that's too hard.

13. What's a common writing tip that you almost always follow?

oh dear. Suddenly I can't remember any "common" writing tips. I try to remind myself that first drafts aren't meant to be perfect, but I'm not always good at following through with that. Does that count? I think about it a lot lol

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them?

lol there are too many to count. One of the most recent ones I had is tentatively titled The GS25 Protocol, is about individual perceptions of relationships, and is neatly summed up in the following exchange, pulled from messages I sent to friends:

Seungmin: what's going on Minho: I couldn't kill a man so I did this instead Seungmin: you what (no self deprecation to this degree on Minho's watch!!!)

17. What do you do when writing becomes difficult? (maybe a lack of inspiration or writers block)

I go do something else. I talk to friends. I hope it gets better, easier, or at least more enjoyable.

18. Do you title your fics before, during, or after the writing process? How do you come up with titles?

All three! Occasionally I pull titles from lyrics, poems, or other works. Sometimes they spring fully formed from my brain before or as I'm coming up with an idea I'd like to write. Sometimes those are puns, many of which start as working titles for my notes and then get stuck as the final title.

25. What fic do you wish you got more of a response on?

I would say Tether but I got an essay response on that one that changed me. There are several sprinkled throughout the years that I had a lot of fun writing…idk. I don't like looking at ao3 stats lol. I try to write for myself first (and fests and friends second), but sometimes it's still nice to know what people think.

"get to know your fic writer" ask meme

[tina-aumont]

Raïna interview at VoyageLA page.

[Raïna and her horse Quincy]

Dr. Raïna Manuel-Paris has a multicultural background, born of a French father and a Dominican mother. She was raised in France and England until her early 20’s then moved to the US. Fairy tales and Legends were her refuges. They helped her understand the difficulties of her childhood. By the age of twelve, she had read most of the myths and legends of the world. From Ireland and Russia to Arabia. She holds a Ph.D. in Mythological Studies with emphasis in Depth Psychology from PGI.

She also holds a Masters Degree in Film from Columbia U. She taught Magic and Ritual and Myth and Symbol for 15 years at the Art Institute in Santa Monica, where she also offered guided meditations and somatic energy work. Her own spiritual seeking and evolution has taken her from Bali to the sacred shores of Lake Atitlan in the Guatemalan Highlands of the Sierra Madre… She is also adjunct faculty at PGI where she taught a course in Archetypal Patterns in Cinema. She assisted Dr. Lionel Corbett during his Psyche and the Sacred workshop with its ritual aspect. She has also taught at the Relativity School in Downtown LA. She is a published author of non-fiction and scholarly articles: Trauma War and Spiritual Transformation, Journal of Jungian Thought, 2017; The Mother- to-be Dream Book. Warner Books, 2002.) She is also a poet and published one book of poetry with Raven Books as well as several poems in various publications. Her documentary the Bridges of My Father was selected for the short film corner at the Cannes Film Festival in 2009.

[Raïna's husky mix Numen]

Currently, Raïna splits her time between Los Angeles and Ojai, CA. She works with individuals in a process she calls “The Cradle and the Crown,” assisting men and women in coming to alignment body mind and soul, developing deep aliveness as well as careful listening to the whisperings of their soul’s desire. She also uses the Tarot and other oracle tools to help her clients. She is a speaker /lecturer at the Joseph Campbell roundtable on the Tarot: the 22 universal patterns of transformation and on Love: Primal Agent of Change as well as the Myth Salon in LA. She has given numerous lectures at the Philosophical Research Society and taught workshops based on the Cradle and The Crown process. She practices Natural Horsemanship, with her horse Quincy, and also spends time exploring the Ojai valley with her husky mix, Numen. She also plays the ancient frame drum and sings. She is working to complete a novel with archetypal motifs. She also wrote a play with writing partner Susan Kacvinsky: “Seeking Sophia” which had a staged reading in Los Angeles in 2014.

Her work with students, including many veterans, always emphasizes the ways in which one reconnects the Soul of the World, Anima Mundi, with Corpus Mundi, the body of the world, and how to hold the tension between the inner world and the outer world in a way that engages curiosity and compassion. She worked on an online course “Awakening the Magician Within” as well as on her lecture “What Women Want”. Probably the one thing that has been at the core of her life is the understanding that we are all spiritual beings, whether we know it or not, magical beings with a desire for healing and love. And that archetypal stories, and the ancient mysteries of nature, provide a helpful direction towards an authentic relationship with the Self. Having a life with ritual and contemplation is very helpful as well. Soul, she believes, needs Mystery more than Meaning in order to feel the joy of its divinity.

[Raïna Paris]

Has it been a smooth road? A life is not a smooth ride, ever, if you want to actually live. What I learned as a child was so filled with confusion and misunderstanding, judgment, and rage, I became fear-based and so mixed up inside I had to learn to untangle all the different strands of my life and identify them, like the four impossible tasks given to Psyche, There has been many losses and deep grief along the way as well as health challenges. But always the deepest learning comes from all those challenges as well as the wisdom of the body, Re-learning to listen to the instincts and the intuition, trusting the inner guidance which has always been there but that took time to relearn to trust. I had to learn how to live from a place of inner authority as opposed to outer expectations. The mystical tools, like the Tarot, and the wisdom teachings of the ages, have always been beautiful signposts along the way.

We’d love to hear more about your work and what you are currently focused on. What else should we know? I am not someone who likes to teach or talk about something for the sake of talking. I need to come from love in whatever I do. Specially because I was so fear-based, And I also need to know what I am talking about, what I am trying to convey, not only intellectually but in the body and in the heart. I am a scholar, a guide and a poet. And I do not ever talk about a subject however scholarly without implicating myself on a personal level. It’s not something I decided to do, it’s just how I am. I am always trying to live a life that is absolutely personal and authentic to me and at the same time, share my experience with others in the hopes that it might be helpful or useful.

So I go into the places of the In-Between, of liminality. It is the place of dreams, of imagination, and it is also the world of Nature, where the truth lives, at the threshold between this world and the archetypal world, I work with the tarot from an archetypal viewpoint because it is an ancient wisdom tool and I believe it helps give perspective to this crazy road trip called life, which often seems to spiral back to the same places we have experienced before. I also teach a seminar about the Cradle and the Crown process which helps people connect with the power and passion of childhood joy as well as the wisdom of inner authority. Once the weeds of false beliefs get rooted out, I find there is a beautiful way to live in tune with the Self and the world around us.

[Another photo of Raïna and her horse Quincy]

Let’s touch on your thoughts about our city – what do you like the most and least? I love that the city is surrounded by Nature, so close by, from parks and mountains to ocean.

It is a challenging place with just as many opportunities to heal and transform, as there are opportunities to lose oneself.

Raïna Paris interview at VoyageLA on-line magazine published the 20th May 2020. The name of the person who wrote this article or conducted this interview is not listed.

[raayllum]

decided i’d toss my own “tdp soundtrack title predictions” hat into the ring, given that i haven’t gotten to one of these since S3 aired, and damn the nostalgia

full track list here with S4 seemingly being from 1-28, and S5 from 29-62. also not going to be talking about every track as some (“rescue at the great bookery” and “threate in the forest” for ex) seem pretty self explanatory, and with that all out of the way, let’s get into it

31. I Haven’t Forgotten (3:41) — Could easily see this being an early Viren and/or Aaravos focused scene, as Aaravos holding a grudge kinda necessitates having a good ass memory - maybe even something that relates to Zubeia as well, since she’s ancient in her own way and is clearly gonna have her own role to play this season.

32. Seeking Answers (3:05) — Likely in 5x01 with the group returning to Katolis, perhaps centred on Callum and Rayla individually well, seeking answers. For Rayla, this could mean looking into the dungeons about her family and finding Runaan’s bow. We also get Rayla’s voice over (and clip) that appears to be her in Ezran’s old room in the S5 trailer asking “How do we kill a Startouch elf?” so that and/or answers about Aaravos’ prison may be what they go to Lux Aurea to, well, seek. 

34. My Most Eager Student (4:58) — First Viren and Kpp’Ar conversation (which the implication he had more than one student if that’s the case?? Fascinating) perhaps, or Aaravos reflecting on Claudia, as it seems she will fully be stepping into her own as Aaravos’ protege this season

35. Keep Moving (3:01) — Terry and Claudia, since Viren won’t wake up, realizing that they can’t wait any longer and have to start moving. Maybe end of 5x01 or 5x02?

39. In Your Dreams (1:55) — Callum and/or Viren and/or Zubeia having dreams/nightmares regarding their respective fears?

40. A Familiar Warning (2:04) — Karim and Sol Regem, maybe, beginning to barter, or a warning from Kpp’Ar that Viren disregarded, cutting to the present day with Terry giving the same one to Claudia that she likewise ignores?

42. Stay Safe (2:17) — Some sort of temporary farewell between Amaya and Janai (splitting up library things?) or Claudia and Terry (leading to her getting attacked by the water dragon?) or Ezran (+ Zym) briefly splitting up from his crownguard 

43. Father and Daughter (1:37) — Claudia and Viren most likely, maybe one of the flashbacks to when Soren was sick and how Claudia was introduced to dark magic as a Fix it solution. “I love you Daddy” out of context spoiler?

44. Like Aunt, Like Nephew (2:46) — A conversation between Amaya and Callum or Janai and Rayla about Amaya and Callum, probably. Could be either their good, protective natures, their hair, or their tendency to make some dark humoured off colour jokes

45. We Can Help Them (2:26) — Rayla telling Callum about the coins, and him offering to help and/or Karim being determined that he can still reverse the corrupted core and save the zombiefied elves. If we do get a flashback to Aaravos’ younger years, I could also see him having this viewpoint about humanity (however ‘true’ it is).

50. Times Are Changing (2:21) — Relations between humans and elves in New Aurea / human-dragon Zubeia and Ezran related stuff? This could also be closer to when the Dragang reunite and put the pieces together. Callum and Rayla with whatever they learned about (murdering?) Startouch elves and Ezran with what was gleaned from Evenere (probably the location of Aaravos’ prison, if Callum & co. can decipher the riddle/poem verses)

51. Blood Moon Rises (1:30) — Karim bartering with Kim’Dael, or her showing up of her own accord. Currently leaning toward Rayla and Kim’Dael perhaps not running into each other this season, but if Amaya and Janai bear witness/survive her villainy, Rayla would surely remember and be able to piece it together based on description, leading to a confrontation later

52. If You Kill Me Now (1:59) — Aaravos versus Archdragon confrontations / Viren demanding answers from Aaravos / Kim’Dael and Karim? Janai? / Callum and Rayla possession conversation callback. Either way, delicious, and speaks to the prevalence of murder in this damn children’s show

53. The Wounded Return (2:13) — A failed attempt to take back the corrupted core in Lux Aurea? Or speaks to the idea of “a festering wound” (out of context spoiler). If the kids have had their pirate escapade, this could also be related to the injuries we see Callum sustain in the trailer, which would make sense if anyone else had been hurt as well (hence, plural wounded) 

54. To Kill an Archdragon (3:03) — Lore on Luna Tenebris’ death (or something we don’t know about Avizandum’s) or a threat on Zubeia’s life. If Sol Regem has been corrupted by the corrupted core or is just threatening Janai’s reign, figuring out how to stop him will also be crucial 

55. Not Yours to Give (4:50) — Been wondering if Karim would even be able to free Kim’Dael, since he’s not the proper heir, and Aditi herself said that the magic was a kind “that takes”. This could also be an Aaravos related flashback since he ‘gave’ humanity something they ‘shouldn’t have’ — whether it was related to primal magic alongside the unicorns, or was the discovery / inclination towards dark magic, we’ll have to see. Could be Viren curing Soren and/or Callum ‘giving’ the Moon fam freedom (but again, have to see). Looking at the “gift giving” motif real meaningfully

56. Deadwood Deserves Dignity (3:03) — If a pirate dies or an according ship is ruined? ‘Deadwood’ isn’t a place in Xadia and sounds like a very pirate-y, seafaring moniker to me

62. Tomorrow the Sun Will Rise (3:07) — So I’ve said before that nothing good ever really happens at dawn/sunrise in this show (Sarai and the queens of Duren dying, Callum’s possession, etc) and I don’t think this is an exception. Karim cites that “This empire is ending, that the rising sun is now a falling star!” so if he’s taken over the kingdom by this point, his tendency to metaphoric language would make sense. A rising sun is also mentioned in Aaravos’ short story, Ripples, following a world changing transformation: “The humans huddled together, scarcely daring to breathe, awaiting the rise of the sun. And when the long, dark night had finally passed—for the sun must always rise, mustn’t it?—they gazed out upon an unfamiliar landscape.” Which also bodes well for predictions that Aaravos will be fully released by the end of S5 as well. 

[existentialcrisistime]

I would like to know more about your favourite Scottish indie/folk musicians, please.

I'm not gonna lie, after nearly twelve years up here I'm still just dipping my toes into the music, so I'm far from knowledgeable, but here's a non-exhauative list of bands & artists I've been enjoying:

Frightened Rabbit — of course, especially the albums The Midnight Organ Fight & Pedestrian Verse. Sad I never got properly into them at their peak, but I very much enjoy them now

Aidan Moffat (of the band Arab Strap) — his song/poem The Copper Top has been on loop in my head lately

One you've most likely heard of — Belle & Sebastian. One of the bands I loved when I moved up here, introduced to me by a friend, and I've still got a soft spot for their older songs now

Ballboy — possibly one of my all time favourite bands/artists, that I've loved for nearly two decades, and I've never met anyone else who knows of them without me introducing them. At least 50% songs mention being unable to sleep, I think, and with the main guy being Gordon McIntyre who I believe has a day job as a school headteacher, that absolutely tracks. Club Anthems 2001 & A Guide For The Daylight Hours are my favourite albums, but I adore them all. I've never seen them properly live, but I did see them play some Mountain Goats covers as part of a charity TMG cover festival in like 2015? and I caught Gordon McIntyre's solo album release gig the other year too (he's still writing songs about being unable to sleep)

Chrissy Barnacle — an artist I've never caught a headline gig of, but I must have caught her supporting at least five different bands over the years (including the aforementioned TMG covers event I believe). Great voice, deserves more than 45 Spotify listeners for sure

The Spook School — I got into these because a friend was/is dating one of the members, but I'm a massive fan now and they're great ! Very queer jangly indie-punk, they've split now (or rather, gone to the moon), but their tunes are excellent and their members are doing some great things individually

Admiral Fallow — I got into these guys purely through Spotify in the last year or so, and I'm yet to listen to their full discography, but the three songs constantly rattling around my brain are: Squealing Pigs (in my head that's an AOS Kirk song too), The Paper Trench, and Guest of the Government

Mogwai — another one you're more likely to have heard of. Definitely more post-rock than indie, or as I like to say, music to lie on floors to. Take Me Somewhere Nice was the first song I heard by them, shown to me by an ex before we started dating (so it must have been good). They also have a song called George Square Thatcher Death Party if that helps sway you. I was friends with I think the bassist's partner for a while (that's the thing about Scotland, it's two degrees of separation with everyone), and I've seen them live countless times. Albums close to my heart are Rock Action, Come On Die Young (CODY), and the Les Revenants soundtrack (an excellent show too)

I'm sure there are MANY more I'm missing, especially the 2010s Edinburgh indie scene that I always used to catch at small gigs and Record Store Day events when I lived there, but hopefully this is a good starting point and an introduction to a few bands you haven't yet heard of!

[300iqprower]

Hypothetical Rank Ups No. 86-88: Jing Ke

[Okay I know I usually do these in order of Passive - S1 - S2 - S3 - NP, followed by the same priority of the less necessary "EX" rank ups, but I'm gonna move the S1 to last for this because it's a complete ground-up rework that'll take a lot of explaining. So instead it'll be Passive - S3 - NP - S1]

New Passive:

Qin Slayer (Augmented) -Apply Special ATK [Qin] to self (33%). -Immune to Immobilization from [Qin] enemy skills. ((Unlocks after clearing Lostbelt No.3 Section 13))

Self Explanatory really. Honestly EVERY assassin deserves an Oberon style ??? unique skill that reflects the kill(s) that made them famous, particularly since it allows a way to offset the natural damage penalty assassins have to deal with...even though they're, ya know, specialized killers. 33% effectively brings the damage up from a base .9 to a base 1.2, which I think is a fitting enough offset. The immobilization immune is reflective of how things went the second time around between the two in Lb3.

Insolent A -> Insolence Towards the Sun

Increase own Quick Card effectiveness (3 times, 3^ turns).^ Increase own Critical Strength (3 times, 3 turns^). Gain Class Affinity half-advantage against [Ruler] class (3 turns). [Quick scaling increased to 20-40%]

Pretty simple here. As always i cannot overstate how bad Quick has it, and that's made even worse when the only quick buff you have is both 1 turn AND only a max of 30%, so we're raising that slightly to 40% (but with the same base amount of 20%, to place more emphasis on leveling the skill to get its worth) and making both the critical and the quick buff split from one turn, to three attacks across 3 turns. Same number of hits, but with much more flexibility, and that flexibility is needed because if you're using Jing Ke as intended then the new effect makes it so you want this skill active as often as possible, emphasizing individual precise strikes that rely on both specific color and criticals rather than a constant boost to strength

Now against ruler enemies, Jing Ke gains both offensively and defensively the 1.5x advantage that extra classes typically get (such as what Rulers have defending against the standard non-berserker classes, or Alter Egos have when attacking cavalry classes). When combined with their new passive this also means they have near full advantage against any Ruler enemy with the Qin trait at. How oddly specific. 1.8x base damage means by default they're just as effective at taking out a certain peacocking emperor as any berserker, but without the berserker's weak defenses.

Name wise, I'm particularly proud of this one. Not just with the parallel's to Jing Ke's recurring connection to the moon through their poems, but also just the idea of that idea of "Insolent towards authority" taking up a few notches in scale to match them standing up to the "one true human". The idea of standing up to something that's all encompassing and omnipresent, that is the center of the universe, something that is unfathomably bigger than oneself, and still managing to defy it.

All I Do is Kill B+ -> EX-

Deal significant damage to a single enemy. Grants self On-Death buff (2 turns). [Activates First] - When defeated, Decrease NP Gauge by 2 and inflict Stun on a single enemy (1 turn). Reduce your HP by 2000^. [Demerit] [Caution: This can kill Jing Ke if her HP is below 2000!] <Overcharge> Medium chance to apply Death for a single enemy.^ Gain Critical Stars.v Restore a large amount of NP Gauge to yourself. [NP Refund scales with overcharge at 20/28/35/43/50%. Instant Death chance scaling increasing to 50/75/100/125/150%. On Death debuffs will default to last enemy to attack Jing Ke, or failing that the rightmost enemy. If Jing Ke dies from her own NP and the target survives, these effects are applied to the surviving target.]

God Jing Ke's NP ticks me off. Such an emotionally moving concept, such a significant event, and it's just....a mediocre damage single hit NP whose main use might as well be generating a star bomb. I'm not saying its the only NP like that but god it's the one that's always irked me since day 1. So yeah, this one had a LOT of rewrites before I finally settled on what it ended up as.

The damage is unchanged, and we're also getting one of the rare times I'm nerfing the base abilities by bringing the number of crit stars down by 10 to 10/15/20/25/30. Not only was this effect redundant, given they're a triple quick unit with a star bomb skill already, but anything I want to give this NP would be too much if I let them generate THAT many stars, and I very much want to take things in a different direction. You could frankly argue that I should just get rid of the star bomb on NP entirely and the only reason I'm not is because while Jing Ke is a triple quick assassin with a Quick Np on top of that, they have the dreaded year 1 hitcounts - including a 1-hit NP - meaning they're completely gimped for both NP and Star generation So on the subject of NP generation, that's why they get a massive refund on their NP now that effectively makes them Assassin Medea in terms of NP spam, with the same base refund and significantly lower but still notable scaling with overcharge (7.5% as opposed to an entire additional 20% per level). Oh and her other overcharge effect is getting buffed but to have double the level scaling, but...well It's an instant death effect so whatever. So let's just move onto the hook of all this!

Put simply, Jing Ke now has 500-Year Old Obsession on steroids directly built into their NP. Rather than 2 turns NP seal and a useless DOT though, it instead immediately reduces charge by 2, which depending on the situation could be much more or much less useful AND it also ensures it doesnt make the CE obsolete AND even more than that allows the two to stack with each other should you so choose to orchestrate that scenario. Of course, this comes at a cost. The NP actually has a second nerf compared to before....though depending on how you view it, it might not actually be a nerf. Jing Ke now loses double the HP, at 2000 per NP. This combined with their new refund potential means they risk burning through their own HP, even recreating their own death as they strike out at an opponent only to die immediately after. Should they die this way, instead of being based on who last damaged them their grudge will instead target the one they used their NP on (assuming the enemy survived, otherwise it once again defaults to the rightmost enemy remaining).

SO, tldr, their np is now much less about the crit stars and more about spamming it until either Jing Ke or their target dies, and even if the former goes first it's not without the last laugh as they throw a massive wrench into any enemy plans to buy their remaining allies a moment of opportunity. Which is a perfect lead in to Jing Ke's completely reworked first skill:

Restrain A -> The Perfect Moment EX-

Increase own Critical Star Gather Rate by 200% (3 turns). Gain Critical Stars. Apply Ignore Invincible to self (1 time). Apply Evade for yourself (1 time). Apply Target Focus to all allies except self (1 turn). Apply Fated Hour (Opportunity) to self if there are at least two of this unit’s normal command cards available: -Locks currently dealt set of Command Cards (2 turns) -Decrease your Critical Star Gather Rate by 500% (1 turn). -Apply delayed buff: Increase own Quick Card Star Gathering Rate (1 turn). -Apply delayed buff: Gain Critical Stars after 1 turn. -Apply delayed buff: Increase own NP Strength after 1 turn. [10-40%] -Decrease own ATK by 35% (1 turn). [Demerit] [Skill cooldown changed to 9/8/7. Star bomb scales from 5-10, NP Strength up scales from 10-40%]

I love you deck manipulation <3 ...even if you along with the sheer number of other effects are forcing me to increase the skill cooldown by more than i'd like. But hey that's why it's a full on rework i guess. This is the first of a potentially reoccurring effect I've decided to call "Fated Hour." The general idea is Fated Hour always involves either shuffle or deck lock mechanics combined with other effects that reflect an attempt to recreate what could be seen as the servant in question's "zenith" or otherwise pivotal moment in their legend. In Jing Ke's case, they find that once in a lifetime moment to strike a seemingly untouchable enemy, and they take it. Naturally, this has the qualifier that Jing Ke must have the ability to launch a precise attack, meaning Fated Hour will only activate if at least two of Jing Ke's command cards is currently available (which in combination with an NP would mean an Extra Attack chain is available). If not, then the skill's effectiveness is drastically reduced meaning you need to actually plan this out by counting cards to get the skill's real value rather than bank on RNG.

Without Fated Hour, The Perfect Moment becomes, if nothing else, a powerful survival tool. For the current turn target focus is applied to all other allies and Jing Ke gains an evade charge for insurance against the likes of AOE NPs, as well as a single hit of Ignore Invincible for the same indefinite duration as the evade. Fated Hour wouldnt trigger simply from having an NP available, so this could be used to grant Jing Ke a temporary Ignore Invincible ST NP while they have less than the required 2 command cards available. That said, Fated Hour is clearly what everything really revolves around.

Laying in wait among their allies, Jing Ke spends the current turn preparing to strike. They decrease their star gather to nothing, both to prevent their own criticals drawing attention to themselves and to allow their allies a better crit chance. They also give up a hefty amount of their already below-par attack stat this turn in exchange for a an even heftier and much more valued NP strength buff the next turn; the aforementioned survival tools naturally exist to increase the chance they're going to make it to that next turn. This is all naturally in addition to the usual benefits of locking command cards. ...On that note, however, this is where it becomes important to count cards. The ignore invincible applies to the next attack from Jing Ke regardless of whether it is needed. This combined with the fact that fated hour requires you have at least one of Jing Ke's normal cards means in order to get maximum efficacy you'd HAVE to have no more than the minimum requirement of 2 of Jing Ke's cards available. Most of the time you won't need that ignore invincible in theory but the sheer fcking number of bosses they slap it on says otherwise but it'd certainly make dealing with a certain Ruler's NP much easier. How very fitting that they'd remain a particular challenge for Jing Ke to properly assassinate...but either way, Jing Ke will still receive a hearty buff next turn. Their actual attack stat will remain unchanged aside from the aforementioned NP buffs, and they're still reliant on their third skill for Quick and Critical buffs, but they'll have the tools to take full advantage of those buffs with a delayed activation on Restraint's original star bomb and a burst of quick-star-gather. The fact that the gather is color specific of course means there's yet another requirement to optimizing the skill, as you'd ideally need not only 2 of Jing Ke's cards, but specifically 2 of their quick cards for maximum damage. What's more, 10 stars is not enough on its own to guarantee two crits, in fact double that would be needed, so if you dont want to leave it up to chance you'll need to make sure that Jing's allies be it by card or skill can generate an additional 10 stars between turns.

This is all a very long winded way of outlining all the requirements needed to truly take advantage of ALL this skill now offers, but given all the new kit brings it's hopefully worth it. More flexible burst damage, anti-ruler F2P niche, sacrifice tactics, and now quick crit synergy with everything from ignore invincible to deck lock. I dunno if it rounds out to Ten Steps per say, but it's clear that when Jing Ke is allowed proper planning, naught will stay their pace.

[grasslandgirl]

finally able to post this bc it arrived in the mail today so I don’t have to worry abt spoiling the surprise anymore 🥰🥰 this is a gift piece I did for my dear beloved friend Jamie @gilears inspired by a row of orange poems they have hanging on their kitchen wall 🧡🧡 mwah mwah

[image ID: an abstract piece in shades of orange, yellow, and red in the shapes of leaves, segments, and circles; with green leaves and gold highlights. In the upper right hand corner is a poem printed on white paper with a gold border. The poem reads:

another poem about an orange.

You have four frames hanging in your kitchen, poems about oranges.

Little joys, breaking open clementine gold; sharing pieces, fingers brushing.

Trying to find the individual words about such a moment of connection.

They hang in an earnest line, glowing in your yellow kitchen light.

In the photos you send, I can see your reflection.

A hazy shadow in the glass, head and shoulders and knobby knuckles.

And for a moment I am in your kitchen with you.

I can see my reflection standing beside yours; two segments.

The photos are blurry at the edges, and through them I can feel your joy.

The tremble of eager fingers, resolved into a blur of motion in the corner.

As I send my response I imagine it’s an orange segment.

Perfect crescent moon.

I see how your fingers shake- excitement made kinetic- as I pass it to you.

This is another poem about an orange.

This is a fifth frame to hang on your wall, a snapshot moment in time, reaching.

Holding out my hand, saying, I’m handing you an orange slice from thousands of miles away.

I split the fruit open, oil from the skin flies into the air and we both close our eyes.

Can you smell it?

/end ID]

[kaikaykoa]

shoutout to gale for being so nice and enabling me anywhosits heres like a whole collection i have so far it’s not that fleshed out okay where was I. for every part of lore I get wrong you’re legally allowed to throw a pebble at me.

SO taking place in oliver’s timeline so I can play with the soulmates concept I guess. They also dont really have names so we’ll just use the place holders I’ve been using. whoopsie.

In Ni no Kuni, Oliver finds this lady (haven’t drawn her yet) who gives him a tip about this other fogged up area of the world and some ghost town civilization somewhere. They find this traveler at some point who’s actually from that civilization. He’s not too sure how long he’s been alive but he tells Oliver about it so he can better find it because for some reason this man can’t just tell him directions to it as much as he wants to.

There was a god made out of clay, molded by the people of the civilization. They make her based on what they want her to do. In this case, they wanted a guardian for their land and someone who can answer to their every need.

One day, there was disagreement among the people and suddenly they tore her into two. One side had more clay than the other, meaning their new god would have more power than the other. The one molded with more clay was to perform the duty to answer their needs no matter how immoral or self destructive. The other one with less clay was the new guardian to protect their land. These gods had no memory of who they once were as a whole.

Those who molded the guardian were worried she wouldn’t be powerful enough, and they kept her away from the other god because they thought he’d kill her. But in the end they recognized their kinship and treated each other like family. The traveler was a close friend of theirs.

People thought splitting the clay god was a good idea. But their mouths were too loose and the first half was enraged after hearing this. They thought humans were much too selfish for such kind and dutiful gods, they engulfed the land with mist and one day, the memories made in the land, of the land would be gone forever. Their stories, songs, legends, history—everything would be lost no matter which stones or whose hearts they were engraved in. It would be as if it hadn’t existed at all, like how they kept the secret they were once one loving individual that was torn into two because of greed.

Anyone who stays in the mist would also disappear when the first half expunges it all. The second half, a loving sister, roams the ghost town, still as its guardian, muttering poems and humming songs of its sad tale.

The traveler finishes his recount of this story, saying he had been able to escape the land before the mist engulfed it. He had returned multiple times just to figure out how to help his friends and his home, and when he finally figured out how, he realized he couldn’t do it. Not under Shadar’s watch, nor the white witch looming over them, prohibiting them from using magic.

He learned he could help one soul from this world by helping their soulmate in another. And while that was one of his many leads, he did the next best thing. Spreading his home’s history to as many people as possible. Although, he knew this was a futile task, seeing as no one could help at all.

Oliver asks him what he’ll do in the end. He says he’ll go back to his home and disappear along with the mist. Hopefully provide his friends some company when the time for expunction comes—if they even still remember him.

Oliver decides to help and ask the traveler what they look like, in an attempt to find their soulmates in his world, Ichi no Kuni.

Although when he and his friends get there, they’re a bit baffled their soulmates look fine. On the outside, at least.

OKAY yeah I dont really have names they’ll go by labels for a bit. The first half’s soulmate is a friendly mechanic with his own humble repairshop in Motorville. Somewhere inside it is reserved for a private investigator’s office? Firm? There’s two signs up front. They’re good friends with each other, as well as a young lady dressed in black who’s the mechanic’s little sister, just like their soulmates.

Somewhere by the repairshop is a little fortune telling booth with a lady inside that Oliver can't recall where he's met her... until Drippy tells him she might be the soulmate of that lady that gave them the tip on the lost civilization.

okay some commentary bcause i know better than to put THAT in tags <- hit the tag limit too many times.

sorry i just whipped up that hopefully nnk-ish clothes i am terrible at character design i hope it doesnt look like nazcaan clone WUGHH. i also like the idea of soulmates being stark contrasts but this guy is mega MESSED UP !!!!! i'll put their drama in some other post or. uh. spomething. also umm i had the nnk2 artbook open the whole time and referenced stuff from there sorry if they look like citizens. theyre little guys. sorry if i get drippy out of character it was funny in the moment

[da-birb-writes-sometimes]

hihi!! i'm not sure if your requests are open atm, but i'd like to request a romantic TWST matchup pls? if not you can just ignore this, no worries! :) i tried to split this up as much as what seemed to make sense so it’s not so hard to read :’)

i'm two-spirit and i use they/she pronouns! i spend a lot of my time sleeping (i'm a very eepy gal lmao) and foraging outside with my friends! i also love video games (my favs being animal crossing, the last of us, twst, obey me, stardew valley, resident evil, etc) and cooking/baking! i'm quite ditsy to be perfectly honest and forget things very easily. but i am quite smart when i want to be! i've been described before as a very humble and dedicated person, but i tend to be very emotionally intense. my best friend florence said this abt me when i asked for a friend's desc of me:

"you tend to be really kind and emotional. you aren't afraid to express yourself in any manner. you also value connections that you forge with people and will always push those around you to do the best that they can. you're very stubborn, especially when it comes to conflicts; you won't stop until you've reached a resolution. you also value passion, both in yourself and others. i've never met anyone so determined for those that they love."

 i'm a leo sun, scorpio moon (again emotionally intense lmao), and a pisces rising! in typology i'm an entp 7w6 721 sp/sx! i’m rather short (a good 5’3”), i have black hair with neon blue roots in a shag/hush cut style. my hair is very thick and very wild and i tend to have a couple of small braids in to represent my indigenous culture (with beads as well to make it pretty hehe). i have nice tan going on (again cause i’m native) and i’m a bit more on the thicker side when it comes to my body and i’m VERY feminine presenting. i have several piercings: (two nostrils, one septum, left eyebrow, spider bites, and too many to count on my ears) and three tattoos: one of the vivienne westwood logo on my shoulder blade, one that says “trns pwr” (trans power) on my wrist, and one of the two-headed calf (the one from the poem GAH i love that poem sm) on my upper arm.

 i’m bi with a preference towards masc individuals, and i’m open to poly relationships although i’ve only had experience with monogamous relationships. when it comes to relationships, i tend to be a bit of a worrywart about my partner’s satisfaction and happiness in the relationship, and thus a bit self-conscious. i spend a lot of time doting on my partner and put their well-being before anything else, but when i don’t receive affirmation from them in return i immediately feel like i’ve screwed up somehow. i tend to view romantic love as like a joining of two people’s souls, and for me romantic love is very much a spiritual and intense feeling/ordeal. i’m very spiritual myself and i put lots of attention into my growth and well-being in every facet of my life, esp spiritually though.

 i tend to look for partners who are at least a tad clingy so my doting is reciprocated, have some sort of trauma(s) or issues (yes i try to fix them T-T), and are emotionally intelligent. i LOVE domesticity and my biggest daydream is living in a cottage with my s/o and being completely off-grid and like, having a dairy farm or something no-kill. i ADORE all animals i prefer partners who do as well, in fact not liking animals or not respecting them is a huge red flag for me. i also get romantically turned off by people who take no time to process or take into account their emotions or other people’s emotions, or by people who are “holier-than-thou” and narcissistic. also very much a red flag to me. in terms of affection, i show it mainly through quality time and physical touch, though i don’t feel limited to just those two languages. im also very autistic so i also show affection through parallel play and info-dumping. when it comes to receiving affection, i also love quality time and physical affection and parallel play, but i can find appreciation through any love language as well.

and i think that’s about it! if you need any more info just message me at @ur-paramour :)

Hi Elio! Your formatting was great, and I have plenty of info to plot how to make hearts melt!

Let us see, oh, silly me, you have two hands for a reason!

Cater Diamond & Lilia Vanrouge

The eepiness does remind Lilia of Silver, so he just chuckles softly and tucks you in. Cater will place a kiss to your forehead whenever he finds you asleep. They both adore that even though you are kind, you are as equally stubborn. Both of them would also understand the emotional intensity; for different reasons.

I hope you’re prepared for this duo because they both are very clingy. The three of you could be out and about and people just see them trying their very best to melt into you. Someone gives you a weird look? Boom, face covered in kisses.

Speaking of kisses, they will kiss your tattoos and piercings. Lilia would be curious about the meanings, whereas Cater would gently trace over the line work. You would just be surrounded with tonnes of physical affection, and they also love getting it back, so please, drown them with it.

As for trauma, Cater finds it difficult to let people in due to his upbringing, and then Lilia definitely at least has PTSD. But it’s still trauma for both of them, both will have rough days. [You said you like to fix ‘em, well here’s two of them.]

Hair-dying sessions with both of them. Lilia would be touching up your roots, and Cater would be fixing up Lilia’s colour. It’s up to you if you can trust Lilia with your hair when it comes to maintaining the haircut. Cater would probably be the better option, he can also braid and bead your hair in cute styles.

INFODUMP TO THEM! They love seeing you get passionate and talk about hyper-fixations! Cater would mainly be quiet and looking at you all softly, whereas Lilia would occasionally join in with you, especially on topics that he himself enjoys; this can go on for hours at a time.

Lilia would LOVE the off-grid cottage lifestyle! The two of you would be out tending to the cows, and any other animal friends you have. Cater less so, but he comes to enjoy it eventually; he can be mostly found in the vegetable garden or with the barn cats.

You can and will have dates where you sit around and play video games together, and then go foraging. Cater would probably enjoy Stardew Valley, whereas Lilia would like Resident Evil.

DO NOT LET LILIA COOK! Cater will body slam Lilia to stay out of the kitchen. Please, for all of your well-being, please be the only cook.

I hope you like your match-up @ur-paramour. Honestly, I had to restrain myself from writing more, as I like keeping match-ups at a relative same word count. Saw 'polyam ok' and I went, "It's free real estate."

But I hope you enjoy Cater and Lilia! It would overall be a somewhat chaotic, but very cuddly relationship. They would also be very curious and eager to learn about any and all of your spiritual practices. Plus some bovine hugs from the cows.

[tracybirds]

Where Parallel Lines Meet (6/?)

wee bit overdue but wow February sure was a month..... I managed to carve out time to add to this in lil chunks and I'm so glad I got to finish this chapter :D More of what I love, John and Alan being bros and chatting about life! I think given university has started for me and given I'm knee deep in work and various other projects that I'm shifting my loose schedule aim to a chapter a month, at least until things calm down <3 That'll give me time to work on other things too which strikes the happy balance I want :D

Huge thanks to @gumnut-logic who had the dubious honour of reading all the bits and pieces that I sent, entirely out of order because of who I am as a person, and being lovely and supportive and also everyone who commented and left likes and reblogged and things bc I'm not the best at replying bc time who but I love you all all the same (I'm writing this late at night, can you tell from the sap??)

Title is adapted from a line in Sarah Howes’ poem ‘Relativity’ (scroll to the bottom of the article)

A fight between John and Alan is followed by an interstellar storm with unexpected consequences.

[Part 1] | [Part 2] | [Part 3] | [Part 4] | [Part 5] | [Part 6] | [Part 7]

---

“Keep it steady,” said Alan, eyes darting across to John’s hands flying across the controls. “She needs more thrust, don’t hesitate.”

John’s jaw was set hard as stone as he eased the throttle forward, his gaze firm and never once leaving the navigational display.

Fast as he moved, there was an undeniable indecision in his motion, his usual dexterity made clumsy with uncertainty.

The experience would come soon enough, Alan knew that, but for now he quietly compensated for John’s mistakes as his fingers lingered on controls rather than leaping to the next task. 

Anything to keep them flying as long as possible, exhilaration keeping them aloft as much as the laws of virtual physics programmed into the simulator.

Wide, green eyes left the screen for a split second, a grin spreading across John’s face as he looked at Alan. The sky beneath their feet swooped upwards with the momentary lapse of concentration, vertigo rushing through Alan’s head as John hit the controls a moment too late, the plane careening to the side.

Alan had been in this situation before, knew how to shift his body weight backwards, how to plant his feet firmly on the floor and brace. Muscle memory took over, a laser focus in his eye as he moved, leaning over to slam the keys on John’s side when he didn’t react like he should have.

It wasn’t enough to be a team, not when they flew the Thunderbirds. A team was made up of individuals, who all banded together and worked towards a common goal. Alan had spent years having the fact drilled into him – if all he had was a team surrounding him when things went wrong, people would get hurt.

His brothers were more than a team. They were his co-pilots. Extensions of one machine, living and breathing not a common goal but the exact same one.

He could hear John yelling in his ear, yelling loud and long and tinged blue with fear and Alan didn’t give up, wouldn’t give up but he was down a co-pilot and the ocean blue beneath him rushed upwards until it filled his vision and his eyes snapped upwards to…

Black.

John’s shuddery gasps echoed around him while Alan sat back in the chair, stunned.

It had been a long time since he’d been in a simulator crash.

He groped with his right hand, feeling for the edge of John’s chair while his vision still swirled with the bright light of the computerised ocean.

“You okay there?”

“Yeah,” said John, sounding shaken. “Didn’t think I’d freeze like that.”

“Mental overload,” said Alan. “J-Scott told me the first time that it happens to everyone.”

“Guess that’s the point,” said John. “Figured we’d just get a ‘Game Over’ screen not…”

He trailed off and in the dim light, Alan could just see his hand waving vaguely at the screen.

“Was it meant to do that?” asked John.

Alan snorted.

“Were we meant to crash into the ocean, you mean? I don’t want to fly with you if you think that’s the final destination.”

“I’m not an idiot,” said John, in a lofty tone that Alan just knew was accompanied by his signature eye roll.

Really, they might be able to trademark it soon.

“I meant was it a winnable scenario, could I do it better?”

“Yes,” said Alan, standing and stretching. “You could. But not now, I want food before we go for another round.”

“Aw, do we have to?”

Alan poked him in the back, digging his fingers into the place that he knew would make John jump to his feet.

“Yes, we do, it’s like three in the afternoon. And I’ve still got assignments to do.”

“You always have assignments to do.”

“Yeah, well I got behind,” said Alan, mouth twisting uncomfortably downwards. “You better take a look at what Brains gave you too otherwise you’ll be barred from the sims.”

They left the room, wandering back towards the elevator that would take them upstairs.

“I just wanted one more go,” said John, glancing back over his shoulder at the pokey little room. “I could have done it.”

“Then consider this a debrief. You always need food at a proper debrief, that’s rule number one about debrief.”

“What’s rule number two?”

Alan grinned.

“Don’t be a smart ass.”

John pulled a face at him and they laughed and joked together all the way up to the kitchen.

They gathered the ingredients quickly, stacking them a mile high and laughing as Alan’s sandwich toppled sideways and John’s became more cheese than anything else.

“Let’s go up to the round house,” suggested Alan. “Good food, good views, and all that.”

A few short minutes later, they collapsed on the balcony, legs swinging freely over the side.

The sun shone bright in the sky, lazily sliding in and out from behind the clouds. Silver capped waves were rolling far below them over the deep blue of the ocean and the wind sang a gentle song in their ears as it rustled through the forest.

It was a fine afternoon, one of those days that made Alan glad he lived in this beautiful place.

Gradually the chatter between the brothers died away, each enraptured by the moment before them which demanded attention and directed them to silence.

Alan tried to think back to the last time he’d been here, captured in this moment on the balcony with a different John.

A small act, sharing lunch and laughs together, something they’d done a thousand times, yet Alan couldn’t recall when it had last happened.

He loved John, he really did, but he didn’t want him overwriting his precious memories. He wished the old John – no! His John, he fiercely reminded himself – had been home more, wished that the Chaos Crew hadn’t stolen those last few weeks away.

He swallowed past the hard lump in his throat.

For the hundredth time he apologised silently for that last argument, for being a source of stress when he should have been anything else.

Ironically, he thought he understood his older brother more than ever now that he wasn’t here.

From far away, they couldn’t hear the breaking of the waves, but Alan had grown up with its song in his ears, the gentle tossing of the waters one he could recall at will.

A seabird drifted on the wind, bobbing up and down on unseen currents as it glided over the ocean. As Alan watched, it banked and dove, making a beeline for its cliffside home.

Together, he and John sat in silence, soaking up the sun and the taste of salt in the air, an easy peace settling between them.

An electric hum began to gather in the air, compression waves carrying an engine roar over the ocean, and Alan knew that sound better than his own heartbeat.

“Is that Thunderbird One?” asked John, squinting a little as the sound enveloped them.

The first glimmer of red in the far-off distance confirmed it seconds later and Alan felt his spirits start to soar over the horizon with it.

Scott was home.

“It sure is,” he answered, but already John needed no reply as Thunderbird One approached at speed, shifting smoothly into vertical descent and hovering as the pool slowly retracted.

Alan knew Scott wouldn’t be looking for them, but he couldn’t help but wave all the same.

“Virgil and Gordon can’t be far behind,” he said. “And they weren’t out for long, I hope it went okay.”

“Why wouldn’t it?”

Alan’s excitement at seeing Thunderbird One, which always felt as though he were seeing Scott himself, faded away into a sombre sadness that always lived inside him.

“It doesn’t always,” was all he said.

John looked down, eyes following Thunderbird One as she descended into the depths of the island hangar far below them.

“Oh.”

Alan reached out and clasped his shoulder, compassion brimming in his eyes as he looked at him.

“Hey now, there’s no use making assumptions,” he said. “With any luck, it was easier than they expected and they’ll all get a bit of a break. Might even get to watch a whole movie with them.”

“As long as it’s not that stupid fighter pilot one,” said John with a scowl. “We’ve started it like five times already.”

Alan laughed.

“It’s Gordon’s turn, don’t worry.”

“That worries me more,” retorted John.

“Only downside is Scott will want to see my progress,” said Alan, groaning as he leant back and stared up at the sky. “It never feels like I’m any closer to being done. Least he can help me with the geometric reasoning thing, I keep mucking it up.”

John rolled his eyes.

“You could have said, I’d have helped you.”

Alan snorted.

“You,” he said jabbing a finger at John, “were busy sulking about being bored and how I did nothing but dumb assignments literally three days ago.”

“I was not.”

“Was too.”

“Well, maybe,” said John, pouting a little. “But it was true, I was bored. At least now I have the sims.”

“And assignments of your own? Brains gave you that packet, right?”

John coughed.

“I guess, technically, yeah,” he said squirming a little. “It might still be on my bedside table though.”

Alan groaned.

“Scott’s gonna kill me and it’s gonna be all your fault.”

“History’s just so boring,” whined John. “Who cares what some old guy did a hundred years ago?”

“You’re right, a hundred years ago they only landed on the Moon,” said Alan, sarcastically. “Hasn’t changed humanity forever at all. We only have Martian colonies now.”

John rolled his eyes.

“Okay, fine I take your point. But it’s not like it’s on the Moon landing, it’s all the Revolutionary War and stuff.”

He caught Alan’s eye and shrugged.

“I did at least read it,” he said.

“Whatever you say, squirt,” said Alan.

John scowled at the nickname that never ceased to delight Alan, but he made no argument. He shuffled closer, a hard light glinting in his eyes that told of a sudden resolve to ask something that had been plaguing him for a while now.

“Go on,” he said, waving his hand at John. “What’re you thinking?”

John looked at him, clear consideration in his eyes.

“I’ve just been wondering,” he said. “Why do you have so many assignments?”

Alan stared, propping himself up on his elbows so that he could see John more clearly.

“I’m sorry?”

“I don’t have nearly as many,” said John. “Besides, your portrait’s got an iR uniform on, the others listen when you say something about a rescue, and you’re a whizz on those simulators. I can’t see why they’d stop you from going except you’re always doing school stuff instead. And I can’t figure out where it’s all come from.”

Alan didn’t know what to say.

Or he did, but he didn’t want to say it.

It had been one thing, slipping into John’s room all those weeks ago to talk things through with him, to apologise and make up. He’d done it a thousand times before but the last time had never happened and the torn edges of that relationship still ran jagged inside him.

He knew what John would have said, knew how John would have helped pick him back up again like all his brothers had before. But it hadn’t happened this time.

And it was an entirely different thing to admit his foolishness to this John who was so fierce and righteous, more likely to mock him than forgive him.

He screwed up his courage, coiling his stomach like a spring and steeling his nerve.

“Like I said, I got behind. I messed up,” he said. “Plain and simple. Scott and John pulled me from duty just before…”

He trailed off, staring out across the water, unsure if he’d said too much. John was still a touchy subject for, well, John and Alan stole a glance at his little brother.

Although not so little now, he was starting to grow as fast as Alan was.

But rather than looking upset at the mention of his counterpart, John appeared more indignant than anything else, a familiar fire in his eyes as he prepared to scorch the injustices of the world.

“You made one mistake? That’s it? And so they piled on the work so you’d never have fun again?”

“That’s not what...” began Alan, but John was off, ranting as though he’d been personally dealt the blow. In seconds he was on his feet, pacing back and forth on the balcony as he raved. He looked so much like John, furious at Fischler or shouting down some paper’s conclusion or drawn into some interest that he couldn’t help but move as he explained his thoughts.

He twisted around suddenly with a fierce scowl.

“And you just take it, Alan, I’ve never met anyone so… so…”

He struggled for a moment, then flopped back down next to him.

“You’re just so agreeable,” he said. “You seem to think they’re right and that’s the worst part of all.”

John lay down, his arms spread wide.

“Worked it out of your system now?” asked Alan with an amused smile.

“Probably not. You’re gonna say something stupid about how they are right, aren’t you.”

“Yup.”

“Fine,” said John. “I’m listening.”

Alan thought for a moment, wondering how to start.

“It’s been ramping up for a while. The Chaos Crew, I mean. You know who they are?”

John nodded.

“They were running circles around us before you arrived. I don’t know when they slept because it sure felt like we didn’t. At first it was easy, leaving an essay to go help on an emergency. I could do it when I got back, or the next morning. No big deal, and then I could ask Virgil to help me with it. Only I couldn’t. There wasn’t any time, not for any of us and then I realised that I didn’t have enough required homeschooling hours to complete the term and half a dozen assignments due so I hacked the system so it wouldn’t alert anyone. I mean what was the big deal, I could catch up over the term break easy.”

“I guess you didn’t do that.”

Alan shook his head.

“It all sort of snowballed from there. The school eventually cottoned on and their truancy officer contacted Scott.”

“Busted,” said John.

“Yep.”

Silence fell between them, and Alan’s thoughts drifted back to Scott, who would be running through the post-flight checks as they spoke. He almost wished Scott had been told earlier, wished for a moment’s notice that might have told his brothers that he hadn’t been doing okay.

“They should have seen how bad it had gotten,” said John. “They shouldn’t have had to be told.”

Alan looked over at him, carefully assessing his words.

“It wasn’t their fault,” he said with a shrug. “It ramped up so slowly, none of us saw it. And now that I’ve broken free of that, I see it even more.”

He sighed, lost in thought, wondering if they’d ever see the end to the chaos being scattered across the globe.

“It’s not always like this,” he said at last. “The others aren’t usually gone so much, Brains isn’t always busy and Grandma usually never leaves unless it’s time to go shopping.”

He grinned.

“Grandma loves shopping, she’s probably going to bring home a mountain when they figure out what happened to you.”

“What’s it normally like then?” asked John.

“I don’t know,” said Alan. “Less lonely, I guess. If you weren’t here, I’d be by myself.”

He shot John a small smile.

“I’m glad I’m not. By myself, I mean.”

He frowned, trying to think of how best to answer John’s question.

“I guess normally it’s more balanced. I still have school, but I help out on rescues too. Scott isn’t as stressed, Virgil and Gordon are usually hanging around, making food and swimming in the pool and stuff. Kayo’s here too and we’d play games together and help Brains trial stuff.”

“And I’m up in space,” said John, a wistful tone in his voice.

“Yeah, you are,” said Alan, but then he nudged him and laughed. “Wouldn’t always feel like it though, you pop up and chat all the time. Sometimes you’d let me come up for ‘zero gravity training’ but we’d just play games and look at the stars and talk. I miss that. Even if he was here and you weren’t, I’d still miss that. He didn’t have a lot of time for me in the end.”

“Wow, so I was a jerk, huh?”

Alan gave John an odd look.

“That’s not what I meant. He didn’t have much time at all. Like I said, it’s not normally like this, the Chaos Crew are running all the others ragged. They’re exhausted and I can’t help them until I catch up, that’s the deal.”

“It’s a shit deal.”

Alan shrugged.

“The whole situation’s shit. Doesn’t make it any better to waste time complaining about it. Bottom line is when I get them done, I can help again.”

“And then I guess you’ll leave me too.”

The words were muttered, not meant for anyone else’s ears, but Alan knew that feeling, knew that fear of being left behind more than any of the rest of them, and so they rang in his ears loud and clear.

“I’ll still have school,” he said, hesitantly, knowing how the reassurance would fall flat and inadequate. “And with me back out on rescues, the others will be home more, they’ll have time to rest.”

They sat in silence.

“Well then,” said Alan. “I guess, the other option is that you kill it on those sims so you can come out too.”

“You think they’d let me? Doesn’t seem like Scott’s going to be keen any time soon.”

Alan snorted.

“Scott let me fly a rocket when I was fourteen. He’ll let you do anything if you prove yourself.”

He tapped his wrist, pulling up the time and thinking it over.

“Scott’s probably out of the shower and things by now if we want to ambush him. Or if he’s wanting a nap, we could get some more practice sessions in for you. I can do the geometry thing after dinner.

John leapt to his feet.

“Well, hurry up then! What are we waiting for?”

Alan laughed and hauled himself upright.

He couldn’t help but love the easy excitement John brought to the sims, which were in all truth fairly boring. Alan had done them over and over, knew them inside out and could fly most of them with his eyes closed.

The sims were fun, the next best to flying for real and Alan missed flying so much it ached in his chest.

But there was a fresh vibrancy to them now with a younger brother to teach and as he raced after John, carrying the plates he’d left on the balcony in his excitement, he couldn’t help but feel his spirits lift and his heart leapt with a thrilling jolt of excitement.

Alan smiled broadly.

He was really starting to like having a little brother.

[Part 7]

[garden-ghoul]

Tonight’s very special poem is an anonymous pre-Qin poem about katydids! As always silly little rhyming poems are THE hardest to translate, so we decided to have a lot of fun with this one.

katydid spread your wings, yellow black and green, oh! you have many children, healthy fat and sleek, oh! katydid spread your wings, buzz and rustle on, oh! you have many children, living very long, oh! katydid spread your wings, greet your cousins sweet, oh! you have many children, huddle down to sleep, oh!

naturally, there’s going to be a lot of translation notes, under the cut.

螽斯

螽斯羽，诜诜兮。宜尔子孙，振振兮。 螽斯羽，薨薨兮。宜尔子孙，绳绳兮。 螽斯羽，揖揖兮。宜尔子孙，蛰蛰兮。                

The thing about this poem is it hopelessly confused the dictionaries we usually use because the characters used here are so old, and I think they’ve shifted usage a lot in the past couple thousand years. So we relied heavily on explanatory annotations, which I then threw out when it pleased me. The primary intent of this poem, according to Baike, is to emphasize how numerous and healthy the katydid clan is in hopes that we can emulate them.

yellow black and green - I have no idea what the character 诜 means, because according to the annotations 诜 诜 is something like “unique individuals in a crowd.” However the modern translation on our favorite poetry site reads more or less “gather low and fly around,” so I just have no clue what’s going on here. I chose to emphasize the diversity of the katydid community.

you have many children - I can’t find anything in this phrase about “many” but I am repeatedly assured that manyness is there. As far as I can tell it says “you have proper descendants,” but maybe it is by implication proper to be numerous.

living very long - 绳 is maybe rope or some other long continuous thing; the site’s modern translation reads this as something like “through many generations your line is unbroken” although there’s a nice image about floss too, something thin but strong under tension.

greet your cousins sweet - I truly can’t make any sense of the annotation on 揖, perhaps primarily because I also had to translate the annotations from Chinese. It says something about entering a gathering and greeting people with false intentions?? Maybe?? I put the cousins in there because there’s a family theme, and who ELSE are you going to be having a large gathering with if you are a katydid with many fat and healthy family members?

huddle down to sleep - according to the annotations, live in harmony together; according to the dictionary, hibernate. I split the difference and had them hibernate harmoniously!

[nire-the-mithridatist]

do the entire ao3 wrapped i wanna see everything !!!

...fine, since you asked and because I love you. I'm putting it under the cut tho.

How many words have you written this year? more or less 75k. ao3 counts the whole fic word count even though only a few chapters are from this year, so i'm approximating from how much of the priest!fic i wrote this year on lesserfeelings + all my fresh stuff on nire.

How many works did you publish this year? new ones? 12 individual works and 5 ficlets in my vincenzo ficlet collection.

What work are you most proud of (regardless of kudos/hits)? i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) is my darling, my beloved, my blood sweat and tears. i rewrote about one-thirds of it from present tense to past tense. i spent hours ruminating whether i would split it into five acts or just lump it all up (i did split it, but it remains a oneshot). it's not my most popular fic by far but i am most proud of it.

What work of yours has the most hits? that would be a map of every blade at currently 14,549 hits.

What work of yours got more feedback than you expected? answered here. (it's my twiyor fuck or die)

Favorite title you used answered here. (also the fuck or die fic)

If you use song lyrics, which artist’s songs did you pull from the most? rather than song lyrics, i used quotes from the poem underbelly by nicole homer for the title of two fics (and all the chapters in one of those two).

Pairing you wrote the most for this year? twilight (loid forger) and yor forger. gotta love me a pair of canonical fake marrieds with secret identities.

Favorite pairing you wrote for this year? same answer as above!

What work was the quickest to write? answered here.

What work took you the longest to write? finishing the vincenzo priest!fic took me more than half a year, so. definitely that one.

How many WIP’s do you have in your docs for next year? just the one that i know for sure. wait, maybe two. idk.

What’s your longest work of the year? priest!fic was 24k, but about 40% of it was from last year. so... it would be a map of every blade at around 15k.

What’s your shortest work of the year? come (my half of our cy/mh duology) is at 383 words!

What WIP are you taking into next year with you? my sxf pacific rim au.

What’s your most common “Additional Tags” tag? not beta read. heheheh

Your favorite character to write this year? answered here. (it's loid forger)

The character that gave you the most trouble writing this year? yuri forger, because i don't... really... like him... and it's hard to write him in a way that fits the tone of my fics and not caricature-ish.

What’s one pairing you want to explore next year? definitely staying with twiyor! i love me my fake married blorbos

Which work of yours have you reread the most? i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) like just during editing alone... it's also super self-indulgent so... yeah

How many kudos in total did you get this year? UMMMMM. gonna approximate again because some of these kudos i got last year, but ao3 counts them as this year because i finished the fic this year. around 5,700, i think. 5,258 i got on nire and approximately 400-500 on lesserfeelings.

Which work has the most comments? priest!fic, but since part of that was last year, a map of every blade at 145 comment threads.

Did you do any collaborative works this year? yeah fam! you and i wrote a twofer earlier this year!

Did you write any gifts this year? yes but i haven't posted it!

Did you receive any gifts this year? yup! and i treasure them dearly <3

What’s your most common category? F/M.

What do you listen to while writing? answered here. (nothing, except when i need music)

Favorite work you wrote this year? there's one fic i have yet to post because it's for an event, and also: i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart) for the same reasons as answer #3, also it's just super-indulgent to my niche interests.

Favorite line/passage you wrote this year? from i carry your heart with me (i carry it in my heart):

In the end, they decided on a plain ring for Vincenzo to wear on his finger and a delicate band with diamonds all around (“It’s called an eternity band,” Cha Young said, breathless even as a voice in his head) for her to wear on a chain around his neck. The size of the second ring didn’t really matter, but he bought one that she could’ve worn anyway. It was so small. Her hands had been so delicate, and—just like that, with that one small recollection—he mourned her all over again.

“You really should stop doing that,” she said. “It feels like… like rain inside the house.”

Sorry, he thought rather than said. They were still at the store, hence the indoor voice; he was holding the diamond-paved ring for her inspection. It’s just that I would’ve married you.

“We’re living together and you bought us rings. What else would you call that, if not marriage?”

30. Biggest surprise while writing this year? answered here and here!

ao3 wrapped asks

[opheliasweeps]

Blog Post #7

When it came to my list poem, I was kind of lost on where to begin, so I started my pre-writing phase by just doing what I did with the persona poem and jotting down ideas to center my poem on. With the way I do pre-writing and all of my poetry is that I physically write down my thoughts. I ironically can’t remember what spurred me to eventually decide to do my poem on memory, but I just felt that it would be a great chance for me to challenge myself. After all, trying to bring in concrete imagery of a conceptual idea can be difficult, especially if it’s an idea that many others have explored before. 

Before I began drafting the actual poem, I looked to the list poem by Danez Smith, “alternate names for black boys”, and I analyzed each individual line and saw what each meant in relation to black boys. Each line was impactful because of the title and the image that each line conveyed. When I read a line, I would go back to the title and sit on it, letting the heartbreak settle. When I later wrote my poem, I employed the same technique. After each line that I wrote, I’d go back to my title, “Memories are:” and essentially finish the sentence and make sure that my metaphor made sense and conveyed what I meant.

When deciding the way I wanted to format my poem, I once again looked to “alternate names for black boys” in addition to the other two list poems, “Things That Didn’t Work” and “Inventory Elegy 3: The Dirty Entry” (by Catie Rosemurgy and Ander Manson, respectively). I noticed that all three are organized quite differently:

“[A]lternate names for black boys'' chooses a numbered list

“Things That Didn’t Work” chose to split the lists into three stanzas of three lines

“Inventory Elegy 3: The Dirty Entry” chose a bullet list.

I decided to go with the bullet list as I didn’t notice the similarities of some of my lines at first; when I would compare all three I noticed how extremely connected the images of “alternate names for black boys” was (things of the natural environment & death). I noticed the same in “Inventory Elegy 3: The Dirty Entry” (items and occurrences that would happen in the home); however, “Things That Didn’t Work” had three sets of different images that did bleed a little bit into one another. I do wonder why Rosemurgy chose to separate them into three.

Once I had realized that the images I chose for my metaphors had many tied to one another, I chose to group the ones most similar to each other together and I even cut some out during my revision process. I liked the look of three sets of three (maybe that’s why Rosemurgy chose it, too?) and the look of the bullets. They looked permanent like that sharpie dot on your favorite white t-shirt that just won’t go away no matter how many times you bleach and wash it. I felt that way about memories, so I ultimately chose to do bullets set into categories (similar to the way our brains categorize things within our mind).

At the very end of my revision process, I checked for grammatical issues, checked for coherency, and made sure that my capitalization was deliberate (Google Docs kept trying to capitalize my first letters >:( ).  It was overall a really fun process, especially when trying to generate ideas for metaphors. I mean, how many ways can you really look at memory? (Turns out, about 14, but only 9 were decent enough to me).