#there is NO FUCKING WAY Sonic can get beaten that quickly

[gritsandbrits]

Daily Reminder that King Sonic from the Archie Comics would have been Peak Power instead of that crummy old man we saw getting upstaged by Mary - I mean - Lara Su.

[hood-ex]

For a batfam prompt: Dick as Nightwing, fear toxin, and Bruce?

Dick was in the middle of trying to stanch the bleeding from his nose when his comm started beeping in his ear. He sighed at the terrible timing and quickly wrangled off one of his blood coated gloves to receive the call. 

“Talk to me,” he said, voice sounding high and distorted as a result of pinching his nostrils closed. 

“Whoa,” Babs said. “What the hell is wrong with your voice?” 

“Got a bloody nose,” Dick explained quickly. It was really uncomfortable trying to breathe and talk only through his mouth. He was definitely going to need a huge glass of water after this. “What’s up?” 

“The Owls are what’s up. I need you to get your tush to the cave ASAP.” 

Ah, fuck. 

“What kind of trouble are our freaky electrum filled friends getting up to?” he asked, already tugging his glove back on and booking it back to where he’d left his bike half a block away. He knew he looked fucking ridiculous running while holding his nose, but it seemed pretty insignificant compared to the idea of Talons running loose and slaughtering people. 

“Just one friend, actually,” Babs said. The lack of urgency in her voice made some of the anxiety in Dick’s chest dissipate. It also made him realize that they were talking about a member of the Court and not the Talons. 

“Oh yeah?”

“She was schmoozing it up at the Aparo Auction House with Brucie Wayne and a hundred other rich people.”

A feeling of disgust settled in his gut, his mind replaying the time he infiltrated one of the Court’s underground auctions. The same auction that had tried to sell off the crowbar Joker had beaten Jason with. 

A shiver traveled all the way down to his toes as he leapt over a puddle that was in the middle of the sidewalk. His bike was now in his sight. He could tell it was his because of the way its blue accents gleamed in the moonlight. 

“Looks like Scarecrow and the Court have been doing business with each other,” Babs said in that slightly distracted way of hers that Dick was used to hearing when she was trying to talk while rubbing at her eyes. It was something she did a lot since her eyes were always strained from looking at computer screens for hours on end. “Fear toxin was released through the vents at the auction. It caused an absolute shitstorm of chaos, as you can imagine.”

“Damn,” Dick said, straddling his bike. He was secretly glad he was wearing his thermal suit so he wouldn’t have to ride to Gotham on a cold seat. The only thing he was annoyed about was that he was getting blood all over his handle bars and helmet. “Is B okay?” 

“Yeah... about that...” 

The anxiety in Dick’s chest cranked back up tenfold. Irrational images of Bruce lying dead in a red-stained tuxedo flashed through his mind. He shook his head, mentally yelling at himself to cool it. If something like that had happened, Bab’s wouldn’t sound as casual as she did now. 

“He keeps thinking you’re dead,” she said, and for a second, Dick thought he misheard her over the sound of his tires peeling off down the street. “Red Robin says he keeps switching between rationalizing that you’re alive and thinking you bit it.”

“Huh,” Dick said, not really sure what to make of that. It wasn’t the first time Bruce had delusions of him or someone else dying while on fear toxin. Dick was just slightly surprised because it had been years since he was the sole subject of Bruce’s fear. He wondered if it was tied to Bruce knowing that a woman from the Court was at the auction. Bruce might have associated her with Dick in his mind since the Court had been after Dick for the last few years. 

“All I’m saying is that you might want to hurry home quick, Hunk Wonder. Robin and Red Robin are out distributing an updated antidote to the people who got dosed at the auction. B’s antidote won’t really kick in for another thirty minutes.”

“I’ll be there in fifteen.”

“It should take you longer than that,” Babs said suspiciously. 

Dick grinned under his helmet. “It would if I wasn’t making my way there like Sonic the Hedgehog on a caffeine high.” 

“D-Nightwing!” 

“Gotta go, O! I’ll catch you at Cass’s birthday party next weekend!”

Dick disconnected the call, knowing full well that Bab’s hated when he did that and was sure to give him an earful the next time they talked. But that was a problem for future Dick to deal with. 

The ride to the batcave was filled with a lot of weaving and a few angry honks directed his way. Dick was pretty sure he might have even shaved off his expected arrival time by two minutes. He was very decidedly not going to share that with anyone else except for Roy. Roy was the only one who would appreciate it without giving Dick the third degree about safety precautions. 

The cave was about as lit up as it could get when Dick’s bike came to a screeching halt next to one of the batmobiles. Alfred had probably turned on all the lights since they’d learned over the years that shadows and fear toxin really didn’t mix that well.  

Dick left his helmet on his bike and hurried over to the cot Alfred always had them lie on when they were sick or injured. Sure enough, that was where Bruce was currently sitting, his feet bouncing in agitation against the floor. He was already out of his batsuit and was dressed in a soft looking blue shirt and gray sweatpants. 

Bruce’s eyes were squeezed shut and his arms were wrapped tightly around himself, his knuckles white. Dick wasn’t really sure what the correct way was to approach him, but he figured letting Bruce know he was there was probably a good first step.

“Hey, B, I’m here,” Dick said, walking slowly up to his dad to try and give him enough time to work out what was real and what wasn’t. 

Bruce’s head jerked at the sound of his voice, his bloodshot looking eyes immediately seeking out Dick’s own. He looked... well, not okay but not terrible either. Mostly just pale and a little shaky. 

It was the way Bruce was staring at him that made Dick feel nervous all over. His eyes were wide and haunted looking as they soaked Dick up like a sponge. It was the kind of raw look Dick had only ever seen on parent’s faces when they realized their baby wasn’t coming home. 

It was Bruce after Jason’s death. It was Bruce after Damian’s death. It was Bruce after T—

“You want to tell me what’s going on in that head of yours?” Dick asked quietly, becoming more alarmed as he noticed Bruce was breathing so quickly that his chest was practically heaving. 

Bruce’s voice cracked as he murmured, “Dick?”

Bruce’s increasing panic didn’t make sense until Dick reached out his hand to comfort him and saw all the blood coated over his glove. 

Oh wow. He was a fucking asshole, wasn’t he?

He jerked his arm back to his side and whirled around so that Bruce couldn’t see all the dried blood on his face.

“I’m okay, Bruce. I’m okay. I got a bloody nose from patrol and... just wait, okay? Let me clean this off.” 

You’re such an idiot, Dick thought as he jogged towards the shower area, ripping off his gloves as he went. Once he was hidden from Bruce’s sight, he quickly peeled off his suit because, yeah, he found that blood had dripped on it as well. No wonder he was staring at you like you’d actually... like you were really...

He grabbed a clean towel from the pile they kept on a rack, and then he wet it and went about scrubbing all the blood off his skin until his face looked raw and the towel looked rusted. He was shivering by the time he was done. The cave was always cold and the water definitely wasn’t helping with that. 

Dick looked in the mirror and made sure there was no more blood on him before he went to their extra clothes supply rack. Weirdly, the shirts and hoodies from his own pile were missing. He barely restrained himself from rolling his eyes, knowing Tim and Damian had probably been taking his stuff again. Tim always forgot to replace the clothes he borrowed after washing them, and Damian usually hoarded the clothes in his bedroom. 

Bruce and Jason’s stacks were still pretty well stocked. Dick made a considering sound in the back of his throat as he looked between them. Jason would definitely blow a gasket if he realized someone had taken his clothes, and contrary to popular belief, Dick really didn’t like fighting with Jason. On the other hand, wearing Bruce’s clothes was kind of weird. 

Says the guy who wore his batsuit, his traitorous brain reminded him. 

Shrugging, Dick grabbed some red gym shorts from his own pile and a black t-shirt and hoodie from Bruce’s pile. He did end up taking Tim’s Nike slides because his own slip on shoes had been stolen by two kleptomaniacs.

By the time he’d gotten himself dressed, he saw that Alfred had returned from upstairs and was coaxing Bruce into eating an artfully prepared sandwich. Dick wouldn’t mind eating one as long as there was no sign of cucumbers in it. 

“Ah, Master Dick,” Alfred smiled, looking both happy to see him and also relieved that he wouldn’t have to deal with Bruce by himself. Bruce whipped around to where Dick was, and their eyes locked briefly before Bruce dropped his gaze like he was embarrassed about needing to reassure himself that Dick was actually there. 

“Hey, Alfie,” Dick said with a small smile of his own. He plopped himself on the cot next to Bruce, and before Bruce could protest, he grabbed Bruce’s fingers and forcefully pressed them against his wrist where his pulse was beating steadily. Bruce’s fingers trembled against his skin from the effects of the toxin, but he didn’t try to move them away. Instead, his shoulders relaxed into a more comfortable position, and he ended up leaning some of his weight against Dick’s shoulder. 

“You gonna eat that sandwich?” Dick asked Bruce who had closed his eyes and seemed to be silently counting the beats of Dick’s pulse. 

Alfred would normally intervene at a time like this and insist that he could go get Dick his own sandwich, but this time, Alfred stayed silent and watched them both with a knowing look. 

“No,” Bruce shook his head lightly. “You go ahead and eat it.” 

“Are you super-duper sure? Or just super sure? Or just duper sure? What level of sure are you?”

Bruce finally cracked the tiniest of grins at the game Dick used to play with him back when their worlds were a little smaller. Back when Casa de Wayne only had a population of three. 

Score, Dick thought with a smile of his own, feeling proud of himself. 

“I’m super-duper sure you can eat the sandwich,” Bruce said. 

That was essentially code for: I’ll throw up all over the floor if I have to eat even a bite of that sandwich. Dick took it as a sign to back off. 

“Well, as long as you’re super-duper sure,” Dick said, making grabby hands at Alfred for the sandwich in question. Alfred only looked mildly exasperated as he handed it over. 

Bruce’s fingers tightened around Dick’s wrist. “Trust me, I’m good.”

When Dick looked over at Bruce, he realized that Bruce’s eyes were open, and this time, they looked much clearer. The antidote seemed to have finally made its way through his system. 

“Good,” Dick said, playfully jostling Bruce’s shoulder. 

There was no stopping his surprised laugh when Bruce jostled him back. 

[softykooky]

Sanctuary : One

A/N: This is my first ever fic! I’m a new writer and I’m just starting so please go easy on me :) Also, I edited this way too quickly so forgive me if there are any grammar mistakes. Please let me know what you think and if you would like more parts! Request anything you like! 

Summary: Seoul's drug ring is sovereign of a small group fo 7 men, who have just gotten their hands on the ambassador's daughter.

Warnings: physical/emotional abuse, guns, violence, kidnapping...

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There was always something so surreal and soft about a cup of black coffee in a cafe that you have never been to, sitting across from a ghost in a booth that you have never sat in. You cradled a cup of lukewarm coffee between the palm of your hands, periodically sighing into the cold air of the room. The barista had given you a few side glances. A normal behavior though, you’ve been sitting here for a good couple hours now. There was nowhere else to go, and the cafe would give you a couple hours to think of a place to sleep for the night before inevitably walking around a park and finding a nice cozy bench. You looked outside the window.

Rain. At least it wasn’t hail. Better to go to bed drenched than in pain.

From the corner of your eye, you could see the barista approaching you, apprehensively and like she was there out of obligation. 

“Is there anything you need at all? You want me to freshen up that coffee for you?” Her name tag read Kim. 

Yes, there are a lot of things I need. No, you can’t help me with any of them.

“No, that’s alright. I’m so sorry, am I taking too long here?”, you began to pack up your bag full of nothing and made way to move out of the booth. 

“No, no, I was just checking up. Take as much time as you need.” She left you alone after, walking away with no intent to wait for your answer. People always do that. You looked outside the window again, and the rain had worsened, now slamming against the glass so intensely you felt it vibrating against the table. It was so loud. Almost loud enough so that you couldn’t hear when gunshots erupted through the door of the cafe. 

No. No. Not more of this.

Out of instinct and past reflex, you ducked down under the booth table, making yourself as small as you could. You didn’t dare to let out another breath. The other patrons of the cafe had scattered immediately, some making it out the door in a sonic sprint. Your eyes shot to the barista, who was standing there shaking uncontrollably with a strawberry smoothie nestled in her hands, eyes wide staring at the group of men who had just open fired.

“Ah boys. I was wondering when you would arrive. It’s rude to leave your guests waiting, you know.” The voice came from a man sitting in the corner of the room, still sipping on a cappuccino with his face tucked under a hat.

“Cut the shit, Mino. What happened to our shipment at the port in Gwangju?” His voice was sharp. Seething and filled with an intense hatred that could be heard from the tone alone. You would hate to be Mino right now. You looked around again, and the cafe had already been cleared out. The barista was nowhere in sight. What luck.

“I know what happened.” A different voice from the same group of men.

“You stopped it before it got on the boat. Tipped off Hyun’s crew that our goods were in transit and you, spineless as you are, gave up our protection and loyalty for a couple million that they offered you.” The man’s words seemed to silence the room. You held your breath, only watching the scene unfold before you.

The man named Mino coughed into his cup. He set it down, then idiotically tried to sprint out of the cafe and away from the grasps of a group of heavily armed men. Even you wanted to laugh. They cornered him, backs turned to where your booth was. This was your chance. You can run and they’ll never know you were here. The barista popped into your mind again. You couldn’t leave her alone.

You crawled out of your hiding space under the booth, making your way to the counter and trying to ignore the sound of Mino being beaten to a pulp that made a familiar anxiety bubble in your chest. You had to focus and not blow into a panic attack. Your advance was almost completely soundless, and the mystery men were far too preoccupied to notice you behind them. You peeked through to the counter, finding a shivering barista who still clutched a strawberry milkshake like her life depended on it. Her eyes held your gaze, tears streaming down her cheek. You mouthed for her to follow you as you turned around once again, preparing for the treacherous trek to the door.

“Mino, we could have been such good allies. Is that your price of betrayal? A million and a half?” A punch to the stomach. Uppercut to the jaw. “I would like to think we are more expensive than that, don’t you boys?” You winced, spiritually sending condolences to Mino. Sounds like he messed up real bad.

You held onto the barista’s hands behind you, slowly standing up and walking gingerly out the door with her in tow. 

Okay Y/N you’re halfway there. Just a little bit more. Quietly, you’ve done this before. 

The men turned around.

Oh fuck. 

The only thing you could think of was flinging the barista in front of you and running full speed to the door, now busted in its frame with pieces of shattered glass on the ground. “Shit. Run, Kim! Go!” You yelled in your haste, still pushing her in front of you. If it hadn’t been for the hand that had suddenly encased itself around your upper arm, you would have made it too. You were pulled back into a hard chest, sighing in relief as Kim sprinted out to the other end of the street, not looking back once. Watching her, you wished you could have done the same for your sister. Now you were going to die. But it was okay because you saved someone from the same fate,

“What the fuck is wrong with you? The gunshots didn’t scare you away?” You turned to his face. If this were a normal day, you would’ve been in awe at how handsome this stranger was. Had it not been for his increasingly tight grip on your hand and a gun in the other. You couldn’t speak. Couldn’t even breathe. You thought you had already escaped this part of your life. 

“What? Are you mute?” He squeezed your arm more, eyebrows furrowing as steam seemed to shoot out of his ears. You whimpered in pain, which seemed to soften his demeanor and loosen his grip. 

“I-I’m sorry. I couldn’t get out in time.” Tears had involuntarily made their way down your cheeks. He sighed, turning his gaze to the other men in the room who had been tensely watching. Wow. Leave it to you to get yourself tangled in a shootout with the most beautiful criminals you had ever seen in your life. 

“Whatever. Mino’s taken care of. Just take her with, she’s already heard everything. No loose ends.” The man in the middle said nonchalantly. Your face paled.

“No. No you can’t. Please, I promise I won’t say a thing. I’ll pretend it never happened.” Now it was your turn to hold onto the man, shaking in his grasp as you pleaded. You couldn’t go back to this violence. He stared at you in disinterest.

“Please, don’t take me.” You had begun to cry more intensely, feeling an impending doom over your head. It never matters what you want. What you need. The world just kept going on. The men exchanged knowing glances, restraining and dragging you to the black SUV that had been parked outside. You didn’t fight then. It was useless. This life will always drag you back. 

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When you woke up from a sleep of exhaustion, you were still in the car. Both your hands and legs had been tied with scratchy rope that dug into your bleeding skin. You looked around at the men, who were all occupied with something and chatting with each other as if they hadn’t just shot up a cafe and beaten a man to an inch of his life. You coughed to clear your throat, but were too scared to say anything else. A man with wavy black hair looked your way, almost sneering at your presence. 

“Princess is awake.” He spit out the words, making you confused. Were you so terrible even from such a short encounter? You looked down at your hands instead, staying silent. The car drove for god knows how long before it stopped in front of a house that you assumed costs more than your life. Before you could gawk anymore, the same man gripped onto your bruised forearm and dragged you out of the car. You bit your tongue at the pain, cooperating with everything. 

They seemed to fling you around like you were a ragdoll. Next thing you knew, you were being shoved down ungracefully on a chair in a white room, staring at your own reflection in the mirror you faced. For making it through a gun ambush, you looked pretty okay. The door opened to a man, a gentle smile on his face.

“Hello Y/N.” You froze, wide eyes coming up to meet his gaze.

“How do you know my name?” Your voice shook as you spoke, fear seeping into every word. He held up an ID card that you had left in your bag. 

“What a coincidence, huh? That when we took someone captive it would be the daughter of the Japanese ambassador.” The same anxiety from before bubbled up again, threatening to spill out of you. 

“I...I have no idea what you’re talking about.” 

He chuckled humorlessly, taking a seat across from you and tossing a file onto the table with your face plastered on the front.

“Says here you ran away a couple months ago right? I wonder why though...was Daddy not giving you enough weekly allowances? Didn’t get you the latest season of Saint Laurent that you wanted?” He spit the words at you as if they were poison, making you recoil back into your seat. You wouldn’t tell him the reason you ran away, but you wished it was because of something measly like Saint Laurent.

“Ah, silent treatment. Well, Ms. Y/N. I’m sure your father would reward us handsomely for the return of his beloved daughter, don’t you think?” His words made a chill shoot up your spine and tears welled in your eyes.

“No!” You screamed in his face, catching him off guard.

“Please….please don’t do that. Please don’t send me back. I’ll do anything. Anything but that.” 

Your desperation seemed to confuse him further as his frown deepened and he looked at you curiously. He seemed to be deep in thought before his expression flattened once again, cold eyes staring back into your teary ones.

“Do you know how many people would kill to be in your privileged position? The money that your family has? Do you know how fortunate you are?” He judged you, tutting as he flipped open the file to read more. You shook your head, staring down at your tied hands and trying to soothe the sharp ache in your chest.

“Yeah….so fortunate.” You laughed, refusing to meet his gaze once again. If your old life had been considered fortunate, you wouldn’t even want to know what was considered unlucky. He stayed silent, only reading up on the details of your life more. 22 years old. Black hair. Brown eyes. Daughter of the Japanese ambassador and distinguished family. Your father is a business tycoon and your mother his arm candy. One sibling; a sister. Allergic to shellfish. 

“Well, Ms. Y/N, if you are so desperate to not return to your cushy life with a silver spoon, you’ll stay here until we figure out what we should do with you.” He pulled you up from your seat and signaled you to follow him. The house you were in was almost as grand as your own, hallways spanning for what seemed to be miles. You guessed that the chandelier above you was Swarovski; you had the same one in your dining room. You felt annoyance gnawing at the back of your head. Who was he to judge you when your lifestyles were so aligned. 

“You’ll be staying in here.” The man opened a door to a large room with a queen size bed in the middle. It looked like your room back home, and you wanted to throw up. Your expression didn’t go unnoticed as the man rolled his eyes.

“My sincerest apologies if the room is not up to her highnesses’ standards.” He shoved you roughly through the doorway, making you stumble over your own shaky feet. The man turned to leave but was stopped by your meek and quivering voice.

“W-What’s your name?” You muttered, ignoring the fear you could hear in your own words.

“Not that I owe it to you or anything,” he said coldly.

“It’s Namjoon.” 

Namjoon. The name suited him. Suited his confident gait and his cold but calculating stare. You wanted to yell in his face. Tell him that you weren’t the spoiled brat princess he had made you out to be. Scream the reason why you ran away. But you couldn’t. After all your father and family have put you through, you knew how important his job was and what a high government figure he was. You couldn’t threaten that position. Your father was still your father once, and not the monster he has become. 

You collapsed on the soft bed after washing up as best you could, with no intention of sleeping. Sleeping risks having a nightmare, and your state was already fragile as it was. You turned on the bedside lamp and tucked yourself into the goose-feathered blanket, finally processing everything that had happened today. It seemed to crash like a ton of bricks, and you let out the pain on a poor, ill-fated pillow that had the unfortunate fate of being near. 

A knock sounded from the other side of the door and swung open immediately afterwards. You bolted up to a sitting position.

“Could you keep it down? I’m in the room next to you.” His words felt like a slap in the face, and you could feel another bout of tears surfacing but swallowed down to avoid being pummeled by your captor. 

“Oh”, you hiccuped, “sorry.” 

“What? Do the sheets not have high enough thread count? I’ll get someone on that”. His words were mocking and rude, and try as you did, you couldn’t stop the dry sob that forced its way out of your throat. His lips curled up into a smirk. You hated that they assumed everything about who you were. You hated being taken. You hated whoever this is that told you to be quiet.

“Taehyung! What are you doing in there?” A silver voice cut through the hallway and you halted your hysterical sobbing in anticipation and fear. Another man. One of the ones in the cafe. There had been seven of them, you weren’t sure. He looked at you and softened at your red and blotchy face.

“Did you make her cry, you brat?” He slapped Taehyung across the shoulder, making him roll his eyes. 

“I told you to go easy and look at what you did.” He seemed to be lecturing the other man like a parent figure. It would’ve made you giggle had you not been sobbing.

“H-He didn’t make me cry. I was crying before...I was being t-too loud. I’m sorry.” Wiping away the tears that had clouded over helped you see the new man. Of course, dangerously handsome and aura dripping in elegance. 

“Yeah, Jin-hyung, I was just trying to hack the cameras in the embassy but I couldn’t do it while it sounded like a funeral next door.” Taehyung huffed, rubbing the spot where he got hit. So this new guy’s name was Jin. You made a mental list in your head. So far you have figured out Namjoon, Taehyung, and Jin.

Jin approached you and gently wiped away the steady stream of tears on your face. You nearly gasped in surprise. Ever since the cafe, everyone has been so rough with you. Come to think of, it’s been so long since anyone has ever touched you with care and no intent to hurt. You flinched at the unfamiliarity, which made Jin frown before moving away. 

“Come on Tae, let’s let Y/N get some sleep.” He ushered Taehyung towards the door and closed it gently. You were alone, again. With nothing but your thoughts.

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“Y/N, you’re fucking useless. We had you to make our family look better, and you can’t even serve that simple purpose.” Your father spit the words at you, accompanied with a stinging slap across the cheek. Some days were worse than others. At least he wasn’t hitting your sister.

“God, why the fuck did the universe give me this pathetic excuse of a fucking daughter?” He kicked you in the stomach.

“All I asked was to not go out and let the press see you.”

Punch to the jaw.

“And you can’t even do one fucking thing right.”

Another kick. 

He always said the words eerily calm. That’s how you’d know he was angry. He would never yell, just said it simply and without waver as he beat you into the floor and your mother pretended not to hear from the other room. 

“I should just get rid of you now. You’d make a good whore.” His fists rained down on you. By the end of it, you laid still and let him finish taking his anger out on you. It was never worth fighting back, anyway. He would just hit you twice as hard. 

You woke up with a gasp, hands clutching onto the blanket that was held to your chest and gulping in air desperately. You had started crying in your sleep, leaving a wet stain on the pillow and your body felt sticky from sweat. This was why you avoided sleeping in the first place, but it seems you cried yourself exhausted last night and drifted away. A cough came from the open doorway, as a man peered in with a tray of food. His shocked eyes told you that he had been here before you woke up.

“Food.” He uttered. He walked closer to your bedside table and paused, taking in the scene before him. You were having a nightmare when he came in, and all he knew to do was stare at you until you woke up. He swiftly placed the tray onto the nightstand, and you flinched in response, which confused Jungkook even more. He shook it off, turning to make his way out the door. Before he could leave, though, you yelled out and asked for his name. 

“It’s Jungkook.” His eyes avoided your’s.

“Jungkook...thank you for bringing that for me.” His hands froze on the doorknob. He never expected someone like you to have manners at all, much less for the same group of people that kidnapped you off the streets. Jungkook left with no more words exchanged. 

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“Hyung...did you notice something weird about Y/N?” Jungkook fiddled with his fork as they all sat around a dining table eating breakfast. He had been feeling off all morning after Y/N, like something was gnawing at the back of his mind. 

“Who? The girl we kidnapped?” Taehyung questioned, mouth full of scrambled eggs as he insisted on shoving more in. He looked at Jungkook confusedly. 

“Yeah..she’s just jumpy. More than most. And when I went to give her food, she was having a nightmare and pleading for someone to stop.” Jungkook knew the signs. He knew what that looked like. He’s experienced it. 

Jin looked up from his newspaper and sipped a cup of black coffee. “Come to think of it, yes actually. She flinched away from me yesterday and I barely moved.” Jin didn’t give it another thought, though, returning to his newspaper crossword puzzle. 

“I dunno Kook, it’s probably nothing. Probably dreaming about someone stealing her Birkin.” The group chuckled at Yoongi’s jab lightheartedly.

“Yeah, you’re probably right”, Jungkook pushed down his suspicions. He was probably reading too much into things. Those are miniscule signs and he was in no way a profiler.

Taehyung chugged a glass of orange juice after his mouthful of eggs. “Besides, she just got snatched off the street by a bunch of strangers.” He looked at Jungkook, trying to assuage whatever he’s got his head roped up in. 

The group spent the rest of the morning laughing over breakfast and briefing over the duties they were each responsible for. More like a group of old friends rather than business partners of an underground mafia that dominated the entire Seoul drug ring. You really had no idea what you had gotten yourself into, and what being the ambassador’s daughter means for you. Namjoon would have to decide by the end of the day what the course of action is regarding your situation. Giving you back to your father would put them in his favor. They would have an in to high-level government officials. However, keeping you would give them leverage to hold over the ambassador’s head. What Namjoon didn’t know, though, was why you were so insistant on not going back. He was going to make it his goal to find out. 

[violetueur-archive]

SONIC THE HEDGEHOG FANDUB STARTERS » ACCEPTING

@tvrningout​​ asked:  “ sorry for hitting you so much, it’s just part of the narrative. ” from demon kaigaku perhaps? these are sending me btw--

❝ I mean, it was a GOOD PLAN... but did you really have to go so hard? ❞ The words come out as a childish whine as Nicolette nurses the wound on her side, pressing a hand to the bandages under her uniform top. The hands holding her thighs adjust a bit as the body under her moves, lifting her a little to get a better hold that will be more comfortable for them both, but all the jostling forces another pained moan from her lips and her arms tighten around his neck— she almost considers choking him at this point, but then she feels his grip tighten just a fraction, and she can tell he feels guilty. ❝ It was a great plan, actually. We totally had that fucker fooled— they didn’t know what hit them! Literally! ❞ She manages to cackle at the recollection, though it cuts off quickly into a wet cough that forces her to settle down. It had been her idea, honestly, so she can’t blame him too much. In fact, he hadn’t seemed all that eager at the suggestion as she might’ve expected him to, which only really served to speak volumes about the current state of their relationship.

It was simple. The demon they’d been tasked to kill was known to be quite crafty, rarely showing themselves to anyone. They must've had some kind of ability to hide, and only appeared to snatch a meal before they were gone again. She’d tried for days to catch the fucker in the act while her partner stayed behind to intercept, but she’d had no luck. So Nicolette decided the best way to get it out of hiding... was to lure it into a trap! And how would one do that? By making it look like they had the upper hand! Kaigaku had fallen easily into his role of evil-demon-defeating-slayer, and Nicolette had accepted her position as the slayer being beaten. Literally. They had to make it look real, so he’d had to injure her a little during their mock fight where he was apparently getting the upper hand. 

After that... the rest was history, as they said! The creature, tempted by the prospect of consuming a slayer, and feeling confident with the presence of a fellow demon, revealed themselves without much hesitation. The moment it had... it was dead. All pretense of hatred between them was gone, and they’d fallen back into their usual routine— being absolute fucking badasses! Nicolette and Kaigaku worked in tandem together, not even needing to communicate verbally to behead the pesky bastard that had evaded them for so many nights. It would’ve been a flawless job well done, if it hadn’t been for the gash on her waist that had steadily began to leak blood— an injury that he noticed first, both because he could smell it, and because her breathing style revolved around numbing her pain to focus. She’d promptly thrown a fit about how he’d actually hurt her, and continued to chew his ear off even as she’d forced him to bandage it, and then some more when she’d insisted he carry her on his back because it hurt to walk.

So... they find themselves here, walking through the woods to the next safe house, as the slayer moans and groans about how cruel her demon is to her. ❝ But you totally did this on purpose— is this revenge for me telling people that I walk you on a leash? I mean, I’m sorry I guess, but it’s totally hilarious! And you definitely owe me for this! ❞

[skytressmc]

I posted 2,777 times in 2021

310 posts created (11%)

2467 posts reblogged (89%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 8.0 posts.

I added 325 tags in 2021

#skytress speaks - 204 posts

#skytress answers - 35 posts

#final space - 17 posts

#final space x reader - 15 posts

#x reader - 14 posts

#avocato - 10 posts

#avocato x reader - 9 posts

#gary goodspeed - 7 posts

#sonic the hedgehog - 7 posts

#bakugo anon - 7 posts

Longest Tag: 53 characters

#the first person that came to mind was fucking bakugo

My Top Posts in 2021

#5

Avocato sparring with you:

A/N: anon asked for Avocato sparring with male reader! Even though they asked for male reader, this can be read as any gender.

Warnings: a little spicy

😼 One way Avocato relieves stress is through sparring. But it's hard to find someone who's willing to spar with you.

😼Avocato doesn't like to brag but most of the time, he wins those spars and that's why no one wants to spar with him.

😼Everyone except you that is.

😼No matter how many times Avocato has beaten you, you always come back asking to spar again. And he appreciates this.

😼One day though, he is just off his game. He's having trouble dodging your hits. He's unfocused and he's unsure why.

😼You get a good hit on him making him fall. You sit on top of him. Putting all of your weight on him.

😼 He gulps as he stares up at you. You have this cute smirk on your face.

😼He isn't sure why he does it, but he leans up pressing his lips against yours.

😼He feels you freeze up at first before relaxing and kissing back.

😼Avocato moves his hands up to your hips. Gripping them as he deepens the kiss.

😼Doing this makes you let out a small moan. Avocato takes this chance and slips his tongue into your mouth.

😼Avocato instantly takes dominance of your mouth, making you let your guard down.

😼Sensing this, Avocato pulls away and quickly flips you both over, letting him get on top of you.

😼He smirks down at your red face. "Same time tomorrow?"

😼You just nod panting.

52 notes • Posted 2021-04-10 02:33:43 GMT

#4

How Avocato reacts to you getting misgenderderd:

A/N: @inutoaluv asked for this and honestly this meant a lot to me. So thank you. This was almost like a venting thing for me.

Warnings: Reader being misgendered, angry Avocato

H😼Avocato was always confused by human genders. But he was more than willing to learn when he began dating you.

😼He saw how being called male or female pronouns made you uncomfortable and was quick to make sure he never used them for you.

😼He also uses gender-neutral nicknames for you. Such as baby, love, and darling.

😼 As you two began dating, he noticed that you got misgendered. A LOT.

😼At first it was strangers, which you didn't mind as they didn't know your pronouns but Avocato always corrects the person. And he will death glare anyone who wants to argue.

😼What angers him the most is when your own friends misgender you. He hates seeing that pain cross your face when they call you she or he.

😼He will get everyone's attention and growls out what your pronouns are. Warning them not to make that mistake again.

😼Gary actually called you she by accident and Avocato almost gave him a black eye.

😼"It's they, you idiot!" "I'm so sorry Avo I didn't mean to!"

😼If Little Cato misgenders you, he will sit him down and explain why it's ok not to do that. And now you have two bodyguards.

😼Avocato wants you to be happy and will always be there to help you stick up for yourself. He knows how nerve wreaking it is to correct people but he will always be there to help.

😼He loves seeing that smile on your face when people use your correct pronouns, and how happy you are for just being yourself and he wants to protect you.

😼He loves you very much and will always be there for you. Even if he has to punch a few people.

57 notes • Posted 2021-04-10 03:26:25 GMT

#3

Avocato catching Reader and Little Cato having a parental moment:

A/N: Anon asked for Avocato catching Reader having a parental moment with Little Cato!

Warnings: Mentions of PTSD, Insomnia. 

😼 Avocato at first didn’t notice anything between Little Cato and you really.

😼 Of course he see you two talk and hang around each other, but he didn’t think much of it. Everyone was friends with each other on the ship.

😼 He didn’t see you go into Little Cato’s room at night when he cried from his nightmares. He of course knew Little Cato had nightmares. But he didn’t think they were that bad. But that’s because as soon as you heard a sniffle coming from Little Cato’s room, you would head over there.

😼 One night, Avocato couldn’t sleep. He decided to head to the kitchen to get some milk.  And to his surprise, they lights to the kitchen was already on. Maybe Gary was up?

😼 Avocato peaked into the kitchen was surprised to see you and Little Cato sitting at the table.

 😼 You held Little Cato in your lap, running your fingers through his hair, whispering reassurances to him.

“I just want to sleep” Little Cato sniffs. Avocato heart breaks hearing him say that. He had no idea he was having such trouble with sleep. 

You kissed Little Cato’s head gently. “I know sweetheart.” You got up, making Little Cato wrap his legs around your waist. You walked over to the fridge and grabbed the jug of milk with one hand and set it on the counter to grab a mug from the cupboard. You carefully filled the mug with milk and put it in the microwave, pressing a few buttons the microwave came to life and started to heat up the milk.

Avocato watched as you rocked Little Cato back and forth, pressing kisses to his head as you waited for the milk. The microwave beeping stopped your rocking. You carefully grabbed the warm mug from the microwave with your one hand and headed back to the table, sitting down. 

You gave the mug to Little Cato. “Carefully. It maybe hot.” Little Cato nodded and took small sips. Soon Little Cato finished half of the mug and gave it back to you. You set the cup on the table and resumed running your fingers in his hair from before.

Avocato watched as the kits eyes began to close from the action. His eyes turned to you quickly though when he heard you softly singing a lullaby to Little Cato. He never heard of the song before to it must of been one from Earth. 

Little Cato’s eyes soon closed, his breathes becoming deep and even. Showing that he finally fell back to sleep.

You slowly got up. Being careful not to move Little Cato to much as not to wake him again. When you turned you saw Avocato standing at the entrance watching you.

“How long have you been doing this?” Avocato asks before you can say anything. 

You looked down at the sleeping kit in your arms and sighed. “Almost every night.”

Avocato’s ears flattened hearing that. To think his son was hurting so much and he didn’t know.

“He didn’t want you to know.” You say quickly seeing his reaction. “He said he didn’t want to be a burden. Of course I told him he wasn’t but you know how he is. He has stubborn has his Dad.”

Avocato smiled gently hearing you say that. “I’m so sorry about this. If I took notice sooner, I would be the one staying up to help him not you.” He says with a frown.

You let out a tsk and walked past him. “I don’t know if you have noticed, but I care for him too. Staying up does not bother me.”

Avocato followed you as you walked back to Little Cato’s room. “Yes, but I am his father.”

You walked into Little Cato’s room and laid Little Cato in his bed, tucking him in. You placed a kissed on Little Cato’s forehead and left his room, shutting his door.

You looked up and saw Avocato was still there, staring at you. “Look, I really don’t mind taking care of him ok? I love the kid.” You say mumbling the last part.

Avocato stared down at you. Seeing you care so much for his son made his feel things. He wasn’t sure what he was feeling but he had a idea.

“Let me take you to dinner as a thanks.” He says.

You look up at him surprised. Was Avocato asking you out? “You don’t have too.” You quickly say.

“I want to know more about the person who has been helping my son.” He says smiling.

You smile back “Alright.” 

See the full post

58 notes • Posted 2021-04-07 05:50:45 GMT

#2

So i decided to take x reader requests for Resident Evil 8. Here are the rules:

What I will do:

Smut

Fluff

Platonic relationships

Angst with happy endings (im sad enough)

What I won’t do:

Yandere

Non con

Torture

Adult and minor in any romantic setting

So ask away! I will basically do any character!

127 notes • Posted 2021-05-21 03:00:14 GMT

#1

The Duke's S/O taking care of the shop while he's sick:

A/N: Anon asked for reader taking care of the shop when The Duke isn't feeling well. This is my first time writing for him so if you guys have any tips please let me know!

Warnings: mentions of person being sick but that's all.

🍖The Duke rarely gets sick. He may get tired but he has hardly gotten ill.

🍖But that doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

🍖When he wakes up one day he can feel his whole body ache. His nose feels stuffy and he can barely smell the breakfast that your cooking. But he still gets ready for the day. A cold won't stop him from making money.

🍖As soon as you see him, you knew something was up. You could see how pale he was.

🍖You immediately send him back to bed, which of course he tries to argue saying he needs to open the shop. And you tell him that you'll take care of it.

🍖He gets worried hearing this. He of course trusts you. But he doesn't trust the people out there. Especially the four lords.

🍖But you assure him that you can take care of yourself, and he hesitantly goes back to bed.

🍖Throughout the day you check on Duke and take of the shop. The only person who really came was a strange man with an injured hand, but he caused no trouble and seemed worried after hearing that Duke was sick but you let him know he was fine.

🍖The Duke is better with a few days and is back to running his shop. But you still help him. You have fun talking to the customers and you seem to bring the shop more life when your around, which the Duke loves.

🍖He of course still gets worried. Hell, he almost had a heart attack when one of the 4 lords came to get to buy something. But was put at ease when you handled it like they were any customer.

🍖So now he trusts you from time to time to take over the shop for the day but it isn't often.

220 notes • Posted 2021-05-29 03:28:46 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

[jjuzoir]

Match Maker | s. banri

request: “Hello! I personally really love your writing and your whole aesthetic is my dream lol 👉👈 Can I request a scenario where reader and Banri are best friends since childhood? You can turn it into best friends to lovers kind of thing if you feel like it. I’m personally a huge fan of best friends to lovers aus, they just,,, melt my heart 🥺 Thank you so much, please don’t feel like you have to rush it and take your time! 💞” from anon

a/n: i accidentally deleted your anon but i managed to save the request itself sooryy^^ i am so sorry it’s taken me so long omg 🥺 i love you sooo much anonie 💕✨ i love f2l so much too it’s so cute just seeing people who love each other being able to be with each other is !!! ahhh ✨💕 i really enjoyed working on it and i’m really happy with it hhhh thank you sm for requesting ilysm ahhh

word count: 2973

There were many perks to being friends with Banri, he was funny and nice when he wanted to be— he’d help you out with homework and never let you down; if there was one thing you could always count on Banri to be it was determined and loyal. But there were downsides to it too like the looks you’d get for hanging out with a guy with such a shitty reputation, the way he’d always get into fights, or seeing him waste his life away due to lack of interest. There were the multiple fights you had to endure, patching him after he got his ass beaten to a pulp the first few times.

But you wouldn’t trade him for the world. You had stuck with him through so many things, so many phases and bruises, beginnings and ends, you knew him like the back of your hand and you knew how hard it was for him to live such an “easy” life. He liked a challenge, something to work hard towards, something worth fighting for— so he could relish in the satisfaction, but that something never came. When everything comes easy you can never really bask in satisfaction; the afterglow after a succeeding.

Maybe at first, you guessed, Banri did enjoy it but he soon grew tired; everything was easy, too easy. How could he enjoy a life with no challenges when what he liked the most was a challenge?

That’s why when he joined the Mankai company you were ecstatic, finally a non-destructive hobby after years of fights and punches. It was why you didn’t mind distancing yourself from him, to let Settsu enjoy himself and get to know theater— you guessed you just didn’t know how far was enough, leading you to grow farther away than either of you expected; than either of you needed.

Looking back, Banri was somewhat grateful; he knew had you stuck around he wouldn’t have been able to concentrate with the growing feelings he had blooming in his chest.

He realized his feelings for you weren’t the same when texting you wasn’t enough, when meeting you at school wasn’t enough; when he realized that he wanted more. He never took into account how often you two would be together, it felt so natural, there was never a second thought or a minute to imagine what would happen if your routine were to change. After school and during breaks, you’d always be together chatting away; to not have you there by his side as often was weird. It wasn’t as if he never saw you but whenever you left he felt a bitter feeling in his mouth, it left him feeling unsatisfied. What was once a friendship that lasted 24 hours a day soon shortened into a relationship that would last as long as school breaks would allow.

He hoped that once he quit the troupe— after making his point known to Juza, he’d be able to go back to his routine with you, perhaps confess or just let it go, he just wanted to ditch acting and see where you two would go. But he never really quit and so the distance between you two became bigger.

You never grew estranged, neither of you would’ve been able to live without the other by this point— 14 years of friendship, of familiarity and comfort, can’t go down the drain like that. To you Banri was the need for a future, for excitement and adventure, and to him, you were home, nostalgic and known. But going from hanging around each other everyday to almost once in a blue moon, it hit hard and it hit roughly.

By the third performance, you and him could barely meet in person— you had joined clubs while he practiced, your classes weren’t the same and your part time job started demanding more attention; so all you could do was text. He hated texting, you could never really express your tone and feelings properly, but your relationship— or what remained of it, now hung on a thin thread of texts. It was weird, heart breaking almost, to see the shell that remained of your friendship.

It was around that time Banri realized he needed to act on his feelings for you, it was when he realized he could lose you.

He didn’t know how to confront you about it— the boy you had been hanging out around, he’d seen you two, heard the rumors of a possible romance, but he never confronted you. Blue eyes could only watch in confusion as the situation unfolded itself; you two were 17, not kids anymore, it’d be weird for him to pop in one day and demand for you to explain yourself to him. Banri wasn’t delusional, he knew you didn’t owe him an explanation.

Izumi noticed the uncertainty and hesitation in him, how something or someone was bothering him. It was soon after that his discomfort was known to the rest of the company and they grew confused and concerned— some more worried than others. It was her who ended up confronting Banri, she had to convince the dyed blond to not threaten the young boy with behavior and discipline.

Even through his short answers and cold stare it didn’t take the brunette long to understand what was bothering him.

“So, you like your best friend?” Izumi’s pink eyes were tinted with understanding and pity as she looked at the young boy.

However, Banri was too prideful to answer, instead opting to roll his eyes in acknowledgment.

“Well, why don’t you say something about it?”

“[Name] doesn’t owe me an explanation,” he muttered, he had thought about it but really— he was also afraid; if you were dating that boy then it meant his feelings were one sided and he could ruin your trust, make you feel like you had a babysitter or a possessive friend, and accidentally reveal the feelings he had only recently begun to acknowledge.

“I guess you’re right, but you owe yourself closure,” Izumi states straight into his eyes, “Just try talking to them about it.”

“Hmph…”

He stared at your contact name for a while before pressing it that night, he spent at least 14 minutes typing and re-typing what he wanted to send, never before had he been so self conscious when talking to you.

As he laid buried within his covers, only the soft light of his phone shining, he realized how important you were to him; he couldn’t fuck up.

‘Hey, our next performance is next week wanna come??????’

Once he had settled for a text and was ready to press send he heard a deep, and extremely annoying, voice coming from beside him.

“Delete some question marks, it makes you look desperate.”

“Fuckin’- were you reading my texts?” Banri barked at the golden eyed boy, what was that creep doing getting into his conversation with you?

“Kinda hard not to when you’ve got your ringer on, this isn’t a coming of age movie turn that shit off, iss’ annoying.” Juza grumbled before shoving his head between his pillows and Banri swore the small wooden panel separating both of their beds was suddenly asking to be used as a murder weapon.

“Fuck off, Hyodo.”

‘Hey, our next performance is next week wanna come over??’

“You are gonna give them their tickets, right?”

“Of course I am, I ain’t some sort of asshole!” Settsu could swear every time Juza opened his mouth he lost 10 years of his lifespan.

“Ya’ sure about that?”

“Say it to my fuckin’ face, eh?”

‘Hey, I got some tickets for our next performance if you wanna come??’

“Is that better, dick head?” Banri shoved his phone at the purple haired boy causing him to swat his hand away.

“Yeah, whatever.”

“Whatever-? You know what, choke on my dick.”

“Come on, I’ve sucked candy bigger than your dick, Settsu, I ain’t chokin’ on a pickle.”

He was surprised that you answered so quickly a short and simple ”Oh my god!!! Yes!!” that had sent his heart into super sonic speed. He guessed that, if Izumi was right and he did like you, that it made sense- and if he had to be honest, really had to be, you could say he didn’t mind the way his heart fluttered around his chest.

‘Come over early and I’ll give them to you’

“And they say chivalry is dead.” Juza grumbled into his pillow, earning a smack from Banri.

A week later and you were standing in front of the Mankai dorm waiting for him, you had to admit that- although sudden, the invite did make you quite happy, even if you both didn’t talk as often you still cared deeply about him.

While you stood outside waiting, however, inside the dorm Banri was getting one final pep talk from Izumi before he asked you out- or tried to at least.

“I get it! Izumi, stop nagging already,” blue eyes rolled as the older woman went over the plan.

“I am not nagging, Settsu! I am simply making sure you don’t screw up!” She shrieked, she was this close to setting you up with Juza out of spite.

“Look, I’m fine,” he assured her, “I’ll just tell ‘em how I feel and if they say yes then good and if they say no then whatever- it’s not like we won’t talk if I’m rejected.” Right?

“Hey, Neo delinquent, you shouldn’t leave your date waiting,” Yuki grumbled as he nodded over to the door, “Poor thing’s been there for half an hour, let it in already.”

“Yuki! Don’t talk about [Name] like they’re a dog!” Izumi scolds the middle schooler.

“Whatever, just worried they’re gonna catch a cold.” He shrugs before leaving the room, if you ended up sick you’d only have those two to blame.

“Okay, now go- go!” Izumi pushed the tall boy before running off to hide behind the wall, just in case.

Banri takes note of his sweaty hands and scolds himself; keep it together. He shakes his head and opens the door to find you waiting for him.

In the second it took you to process the opened door, Banri felt himself fall in love with you. After not seeing each other in person since the start of the new semester, it dawned on him how much he yearned to be with you.

“Banri, I missed you!” You throw your arms around your friend, you were excited— it had been weeks since you’d last seen him and you missed him, even if you two didn’t talk as much there was never a day you didn’t think of him in some way.

“[Name],” he ruffled your hair, his eyes softening as he looked at you, “I missed you too.”

“I’m so excited,” you pulled away from him, looking him straight in the eyes, “I was so worried I wouldn’t get tickets, I really wanted to see you act again!”

“Tch, ain’t you a fan?” He teases you, making way for you to come inside the dorms and you gladly do. It had been months since you last came, but it still looked and felt the same; he felt and looked the same, he looked smarter though, more mature and put together.

“You’re talking as if I wouldn’t come see my best friend.” You smile up at him and he feels his heart clench in his chest at your words.

As he leads you to the living room he wonders if he should actually tell you— unlike most things in his life, you were always there, no matter what he was doing you’d always stuck around him. Ever since you were young, Banri can’t remember a time where you weren’t there and, honestly, he didn’t want to.

His silence catches your attention and you decide to speak up; “So, how have things been?”

“Ah, good, they’ve been good,” he coughs, he felt stupid getting nervous over this- he should just get it out as fast as possible, “and you?”

“Things ‘ve been well, kinda weird without you around.” You admit awkwardly as you sit down on the couch.

He nods, a smile gracing his lips as he thinks about how to lead the conversation where he needs it to be. He remembers Izumi’s words and advice, he deserved closure and, maybe it was selfish of him but, he wanted a relationship with you too. He really, really wanted a relationship with you.

“[Name]?” He speaks out, his voice wavering slightly and if he could he’d beat himself up for it. Hearing the uncertainty behind his words you almost shoot up from your seat in worry.

“Yeah?”

“I- I know it’s sudden and,” he takes a deep breath, “it’s gonna sound weird but I, uh- realized somethin’.”

You nod confused, you were listening to him and you wanted him to continue; that’s the moment he realized he’d need to fold whatever pride he had left and throw it in the air if he wanted to know the truth.

“It’s very weird and if it makes you uncomfortable it’s okay! It’s just, I've heard about you goin’ out with someone and I wanted to know if-?”

“Oh! You mean Rin, right? No, don’t worry, he’s dating someone; we’re just friends!” You laugh as you explain.

“Oh, good.” Even with his, albeit limited compared to other members, acting experience he couldn’t quite hide the relief that washed over his face and body at the revelation.

“Why do you wanna know? Worried you’re gonna lose me?” You tease but the words he uttered next made you do a double take his way.

“Yeah, actually- funny you’d say that.” He sighs before looking around the room, “I didn’t invite you just for the tickets, [Name], I-I wanted to tell you something… I like you.”

You feel the blood rushing to your ears and spread through your cheeks, you were sure you were practically heating up the room just from your blushing alone.

“You like me?” You ask him, you were extremely flattered and the thought that a guy like Banri liked you was nice. You liked him, you’ve liked him for a pretty long time but were too afraid to say anything so for him to, after so many years, tell you he liked you was straight out of a shojo manga.

“Yeah, it’s okay if you feel weird, I just wanted to say it, ya’ know?” He avoids your eyes and you quickly piece together the rest. He’d been acting weird, all shy and nervous, his texts were kinda dry, and even when you did meet in the hallway he had been acting off… was it all because he liked you?

“Banri, I- wow, me too,” you stutter, fidgeting with your fingers slightly at his confused face, “I kinda like you too.”

“Ya’ do?” It was his turn to jump from his seat at your words, his heart knocking against his chest as if it were about to explode from the override of emotions he was feeling at your words.

“Yeah, it’s embarrassing,” you laugh, “but I’ve liked you for some time now, I’m surprised you didn’t notice.”

His signature cocky smile is back on his face as soon as you say it and you wish you could take it back so he wouldn’t tease you, but would it really be Banri if he didn’t make fun of you even just a little bit.

“Shoulda’ known, no one can resist me.” He plopped himself next to you and you shove him slightly.

“Yeah, no one can resist you and your bowl cut.”

“You said it looked good!” He glares at you but you know he isn’t angry at all.

“Yeah when we were like 10?” You ruffle his hair, the soft strands gliding through your fingers and Banri is sure that if he had a tail it’d be wagging.

“Ya? Well why d’ya like me if I got a stupid bowl cut?” He grabs your hand and levels himself to look you in the eyes.

“Because you’re smart,” you lean closer and peck his lips, “and cute, even with that shitty hair.”

“You can’t insult me and compliment me like that! You're gonna give me whiplash, geez.” His eyes widen at your actions and he blushes a deep pink, and you do your best to memorize that look knowing it was rare.

“Ew, the NEO delinquent is flirting on our couch,” you both hear a whine from behind you two and you jump startled, “Now we’ve gotta clean it up.”

“We’d appreciate it if you kept the PDA minimal with the kids here, Settsu.” Sakyo glares at the young man, you could almost miss the soft smile as he watched his leader finally look like himself again.

“So, [Name], you two dating or what?” Izumi pokes her head out of her hiding spot, going straight to the point.

“Please, he probably didn’t even give ‘em the tickets.” Juza makes his way through the small crowd and into the kitchen area.

“Yes I did-“

“No you did not.” You correct him, causing the actor to blush even redder at your words.

“Told ya’.”

“Cut it off you guys!” The director scolded everyone in the room, too excited at the newly formed couple to care about much else, “Are you two dating?”

“I think we are.” You look at Banri who looked back at you, his scowling face softening until a smile broke out.

“We are.” He confirms, giving you a kiss on the cheeks with a smile and you feel light on your feet with excitement.

“I should start a match-making agency or something.” Izumi giggles at her comment, proud to finally have helped the young boy.

“With your dating life? Please.” Sakyo laughs at the younger woman.

[shadowofthelamp]

I love dunking on the guy but realizing scourge, age 17, ended up so shaken by being repeatedly beaten into the ground in prison that he just wanted to be ignored when a big chunk of his personality pre-prison was demanding attention is... actually kinda fucked up?

it's laid out in the text that instead of the therapy sessions some other inmates got, the guards just ignored it when other inmates ground him into the dirt in hopes it would beat the attitude/resistance out of him and like. holy shit. I know in sonic ages barely matter (you could say tails is anywhere from 8 to 20 and his personality could stay unchanged) but still, even if he wasn’t under 18, that’s still pretty messed up!

I know that fiona brought his confidence back up pretty quickly (because dwelling would be Really Depressing For A Kid's Series) but lockdown was the last arc he was part of before the reboot, so I'm genuinely curious if this was going to come back whenever he showed up next.

and the thing is... this feels like a pretty natural thing to happen to the character in this situation? he's a cocky ass, but he's also made of tissue paper and he falls apart if he's challenged the right way, because he's all bluster with no real bite and relies on violence to get his way. he knows nobody likes him. he knows nobody has EVER really liked him. when he's in a scenario where he can't just kick others down to prove his worth to himself, when he's alone with others that can kick BACK, he has no strong center to cling to and collapses.  

[demonwielda]

     Alright, so you all should be used to these metas by now, but here comes ANOTHER one that I now am noticing the differences, and it goes around the Trump Card once more. Now, you all are probably like ‘Wolf we get it, it’s fuckin’ op, lets move on,’ but in truth, unless you read the manga, and watch the anime, and see the differences? You do not SEE the true overpowered ability, and WHY she can only use it one time. And so, I’m here to spill the details down below.

     I will say, I IMPLORE all my followers to read this, but this is a VERY long piece, so take it in strides.

     Alright so, first off, I am going to describe the Animation and then the manga. Then I will finish with the way I interpret the activation for my Akame, because I feel a combination of the two is more fitting. Now I will state, the manga is the one that TRULY matters, but we get to that later. 

     First off, the activation. In the anime, NO ONE asks about whether she does or doesn’t have an activation for her Trump Card, or even IF there is a Trump Card in general. Only in the fight with Esdeath, when she has no choice, does she release it, and the activation is the most interesting of all of them in my opinion. Murasame is known as the one cut killer, none can purify the poison, and the only way to stop the spread is by AMPUTATING your limb. Esdeath in the anime is shown being fast enough to do so, but in the anime, the encroaching poison is much slower. It gives you time to regret before you die. So she only had to act in a split second motion to cut off her arm, but this is the ONLY way to stop the spread. 

     So the fact that Akame not only CUTS herself, and INJECTS herself with the very poison that would take any life, but the CURSE then embodies itself in her, and gives her IMMENSE strength and speed for a limited time, because she overcame and accepts the curse. That was something of an amazing spectacle. And even the quote she spoke while ushering in the transformation was something of a masterpiece,   

      ❝  I've killed countless people...grief, sorrow, rage, resentment...the Murasame remembers all the lives I've taken. I accept responsibility for all of them. ❞ 

     And then, the fighting began. Down below is some gifs I snagged to show off the change better. To which their origin that I found them from is HERE. 

     Now, this was a pretty awesome way to activate a Trump Card, and was honestly the least flashy one of all. I liked it. It fit her, because she is the least FLASHY character of all of them. 

     Now, we get to the Manga version. 

     And wow, the Manga version was my more favorite moment, even though I feel much more sorrow for her having to activate the ability there. So first, the difference in the activation is much more different. In the Manga, she is told that she must cast aside her humanity to unleash it. And when Tatsumi asks Lubbock, about it, that is all that is said. He doesn’t tell Tatsumi what that means, and no one understands until the moment she does. Now, how does all of this happen? We shall now go over it. 

     The final chapters of the manga is nothing short of an all out WAR after the First Teigu falls. It’s Esdeath versus the very WORLD at this point. A million soldiers, and she is perfectly able to handle herself. Soldiers after soldiers sacrifice their lives all just to buy Akame time to seek out a single opportunity to strike. And what is Akame doing this entire time? Circling. All she is doing is dashing through group after group of soldiers, watching, and waiting. Her presence fully concealed in the shadows of the carnage, and her aura gone, all just waiting. 

     And Esdeath is enjoying herself --- as it is Esdeath, so she indeed will. It’s the fight she has been waiting for her whole LIFE! 

     The entire FIGHT was designed to keep Akame secret and secure from Esdeath’s vision. And it worked. Even the losing control Tatsumi joins the fray, and fights...just in time for Akame to land a single strike on Esdeath’s raised up arm as she let down her guard. And the cut wasn’t even that large: it was nothing more than a scratch really. But in the Manga, the poison creeps FAR too quickly for you to amputate before you die. Even Esdeath had no choice but to use Mahapadma, in order to amputate her arm in time. 

     Now, that alone is stronger than the Anime rendition: the poison spread. Once you are cut, you have no chance of amputating it normally. But we move on. Now, she is without an arm, and we get to the true point that I actually do, but also DON’T enjoy about her Trump Card: how is it activated. As we can see in the last panel, Tatsumi is about to strike Esdeath through her Mahapadma, and he is close to the end of his strength. He is beaten easily, and Akame rushes to his side, only for him to attack HER instead. But in the last second, he freezes his whole body up. And BEGS her to keep her promise: TO KILL HIM BEFORE HE LOSES HIS CONTROL FULLY. 

     And she does. She keeps her promise, and plunges Murasame into his chest in his moment of control. And kills him. 

     And with that, Akame unleashes her Trump Card.

     Okay, WOW was this moment heartbreaking...but what came next was worse. This is when we found out the truth of Murasame: why it chose Akame, why it ALLOWED her to master it fully, and WHY she can only use her Trump Card one time EVER! And I will separate the long QUOTE from the rest of this.

      ❝  The countless lives she had taken before this moment...the carnage...the slaughter...the bloodshed...But it was now...regardless of the circumstances, where she had once again thrust her blade into the body of a friend. The first time, it had happened was when she first acquired murasame. If push came to shove, Akame had resolved herself to kill even her own little sister. This type of conviction is what led murasame to strongly acknowledge her as the true owner and wielder of it's cursed blade. Simply put...she had released...it's trump card, Ennoodzuno. ❞

     Wow. Now let’s take in everything we have been told prior of what it takes for her to unleash this ability. She must CAST ASIDE HER HUMANITY, it can only be used ONE time: and now, it is activated by the death of someone close to her. That SHE ended. And that is why it can only be used one time: because it took her, from what we can gather (I have not read Akame Ga Kiru ZERO! yet, as it’s still ongoing and being translated alike with Hinowa ga Yuku!) the death of a CLOSE FRIEND at her own hands. 

     From what I can gather, she was close to the ORIGINAL wielder of said blade, and claimed it by killing him with it. That is why Murasame accepted her and only her now. But, then, killing Tatsumi, that is when she unleashed it’s FULL power. Her Trump Card, resigning herself to dying after this final fight. But putting her all in bringing down Esdeath. And the activation is so much more cataclysmic than it was in the Anime. In the anime, it was just a DARK MIST swirling around her as she succumbed to the poison. In the Manga? She literally ignites in an explosive field of power that FREEZES her foe in her tracks. Imagine that: Esdeath, midst of killing someone, full on FREEZES UP and looks back with FEAR to Akame when she fears NOTHING.

     Already, we see the difference: this Trump Card is one of the strongest ones there is between all Teigu, but we do not finish there. This is just the activation alone. Next? We get to the power it gives off. 

     In the Anime, Akame is able to move at speeds that make her imperceptible to the human eyes. Now, in the Anime, she was already fast, but now she is faster --- and yet Esdeath can still see her. Perceive her movements, and they fight like EQUALS now. It was a very flashy and wonderful fight, I will not lie. But...this is not the case. But here’s some gifs showing it.

     Wow, she’s FAST but seems Esdeath is still on par, yeah? And of course, Akame outsmarts her, using her bloodlust against her and baiting out Mahapadma, and Akame kills her. GGWP. But...this is underpowering Akame. Yes, you heard me: AKAME IS NOT SHOWN AS POWERFUL AS SHE SHOULD BE BY THE ANIME. 

     First off, Akame is just enhanced in aspects of her body in the anime. That is the first HUGE difference. Now, that might not seem that huge, but it is. In the Manga, she literally RADIATED darkness. It swirled around her in a thick smog and was unleashed by her very every action. A strike of her sword, her dashes, ANYTHING. Which is pretty badass, but we move on. 

     Next, her speed: ESDEATH COULD NOT EVEN SEE OR KEEP UP WITH HER. She moved so fast, NOTHING could match it. You could be Sonic or even the fucking Flash, and you are not going to match her speed. (Okay Flash probably could but not without altering time.) She is so fast, she creates a sonic wave every dash, and the human eyes cannot perceive her movements, and the human brain CANNOT react in time. 

     Now, Esdeath had turned to face her originally on the manifestation of her Trump Card. Then turned her attention back to whom she held aloft and was going to end his life. Before she even had the ability to LIFT HER SWORD, Akame was able to DASH FORWARD, and then AROUND for a surprise strike to Esdeath’s back faster than she could even BLINK. And if not for the fact that Esdeath only had to raise her blade a couple inches, she’d have NOT blocked that strike in time. But we don’t stop there. 

     Now, she was just KICKED flying, and in the span of an instant of Esdeath’s thrust, she was able to hack apart her sword MULTIPLE times, while in mid-flight. That’s inconceivable. The amount of speed you’d have to have to even CONTEMPLATE that thought, let alone then act on it, is inhuman. But we still are not done. The last panel shows another bout of speed: ANGLING HER BLADE behind her to GUARD against the hidden spike rising behind her, so she IS NOT impaled from behind. 

     But we still don’t stop there. He’s where we truly see the danger that is in Akame’s speed.

     Now, if you notice, even in mid air, with NO ABILITY to fly, she was able to correct her posture, and turn her upwards launch into allowing her to connect herself to one pillar, quickly use it’s propulsion to LAUNCH herself to each one, and then lunge down at Esdeath. And, Esdeath even saw this coming, and when jumping backwards, Akame’s speed was surpassing hers to such a degree, she STILL lost her fingers from the action. 

     Because she was a half second too slow. If she was any slower, she would have DIED from this single strike. 

     Esdeath is known for being a tactical genius, and so she decides to make an advantage of her own. And how does she do this? She creates a literal BARRIER wanting to keep all others from the fight, but it’s true purpose is not only to shoot out ice from all sides of Akame to wear her down, but she is FREEZING the very air around them to SLOW our dear little Assassin back to speeds she can fight against. 

     Akame is a tactical genius as well, she may be very awkward and very socially inept but when it comes to combat, she’s DANGEROUS. She is VERY intelligent, and she realized what was going on before it was too late. But even then, battles of attrition are in Esdeath’s favor, as well as any other opponent against Akame, as her Trump Card takes a HEAVY toll on her body. 

     Yikes, so not only is Esdeath evening the playing field by slowing Akame by basically freezing her from the inside, but she created a IMPENETRABLE SUIT OF ICE to defend herself. All because she wanted to BAIT our assassin into a full power strike. 

     Akame is known for her speed. But if you know anything about Speed, you know when you add Strength to the mix, it slows you. And that is exactly what Esdeath baits.

     Now, the similarity of the Trump Card shows. Akame is strongest when it first manifests, as that is when she is at her peak of power. But the more she uses it, as we see here, SHE TIRES QUICKLY and loses control of her power. And then, she is no more than just her: just Akame. 

     Now we come to the conclusion of this piece: Ennoodzuno is NOT as overpowered as one may think, but it definitely is STILL the most powerful and dangerous Trump Card of all the Teigu. But it is NOT her strongest weapon or tool. As even when Murasame, directly after that final panel, is SHATTERED, Akame wins the fight PURELY on intellect alone.

     And once more, WOW, that was anti-climatic, but, it was a fitting end. It showed that Akame does not rely on her power. Unlike Esdeath, who DOES. She relies on her powers, on her combat prowess, and gets cocky. She was baited, once more, by Akame, and it lead to her downfall. 

     So let’s pull everything together! First off, Akame is much smarter than people give her credit for. She is a teen / young adult, and she hasn’t had NORMAL education classes or anything of the sort, so she can come off as stupid. But in combat, her EXPERIENCE is where her knowledge comes from, and she is a deadly force. And no matter what her weapon is? She will kill you. The best quote to tend this is down below. 

                          ❝ She may be adept at KILLING...                                     ...but her SPECIALTY...                                                   ...is simply to BURY! ❞

[theofficialautisticgamer]

No Tails, Not True Dat Why Sonic Forces' Story Is An Epic Fail Critique by TheAutisticGamer (Michael) SPOILERS FOR SONIC FORCES DOWN BELOW! WARNING: STRONG LANGUAGE! People who play Sonic games are so divided nowadays. There are the ones who hate every modern Sonic Game, then there are the people complaining about the ones hating every modern Sonic Game, then there are the people who think Generations and Mania are the only good ones, but we also have people who think the Modern Games are good with the exception of the Xbox 360 Sonic The Hedgehog and Sonic Boom Rise of Lyric... It's just a god damn mess. But, for me, I haven't played a 3D Sonic Game since Sonic and the Black Knight (which I liked at the time) but when I finally played through Sonic Forces, I liked it. I liked the graphics, the short burst gameplay (Even if it's two and a half hours long) and the awesome kick ass soundtrack which was the Persona 5 of the Sonic series. However, aside from one of the worst and most cringe worthy villains of all time, there is one thing that Sonic Forces fails at tremendously. The story. Now people might think, Michael, of course the story is going to be shit, Sonic Adventure 2 had the moon blow up in half and the Earth didn't go out of orbit with the other planets. Or Michael, Shadow The Hedgehog's story made you play through it 10 times just to get to the real ending. This is on a whole nother level of shit. First, even if Sonic Forces had a good story, we would still have to sit through some of the most cringe worthy dialogue and scenes ever put to game by Sonic Team. So lets get into why the story was an epic fail, even for a decent game and how we could have fixed it. Basically, Eggman is planning something big and laughs evily at his new creation. Then, all of a sudden, you're thrown into a level with Modern Day Sonic with Tails being like "OMFG SONIC EGGMAN IS ATTACKING EVERY1 HELP!!11" and it feels really rushed and disjointed. The level ends pretty quickly as well so then you get to another cutscene where Sonic saves Tails and some generic looking OC characters. Who are they? Why should we care if Eggman kills them? With the exception of Tails? Then, Eggman beats Sonic while Tails looks at his IPad or whatever he has and DOES LITERALLY NOTHING TO HELP HIM. Tails doesn't just fly into action trying to fight the hallucinations of characters, he just sits there saying "HMMM... I can't identify them." Basically, everyone then thinks Sonic is dead and Eggman takes over the whole world. Uhm, you know, there are other people who wouldn't take that shit. Where is the military? Where is the president from Sonic Adventure 2? Where is ambassadors of peace? Seriously? No one? Of fucking course, because this world only has one human and millions of anthropomorphic people who do jack shit. So Silver, Knuckles and everyone else form a rebellion and say some pretty bad dialogue and then we are introduced to our OC who you create. Knuckles immediately tells him to go on a mission that could get him killed even though it's his first day on the job. So that's when we find out Sonic is alived and has been tortured for months. But when we see Sonic, he is acting like "AH YEAWH, DIS IS HAPPENIN!" from his Sonic Adventure type of character. This is not believable at all. First, he doesn't look like he is scarred, bruised, bloody, battered, anything that would make him look like he had been tortured. What was the torture? Making him watch Jersey Shore? Because that could psychologically damage him and not kill him. Also, he gets out easily because for some reason his bonds are untied automatically and then he fights Zavok and... punches him? SINCE WHEN DOES SONIC PUNCH PEOPLE!? So the OC rescues Sonic and even though Sonic was apparently tortured for months, Knuckles asks him to immediately go on a dangerous mission with the OC that could potentially kill him because of his apparent tortured state. You know what? I'm thinking he was tortured with boredom because he doesn't do anything. The whole game then consists of Tails trying to get Omega working, then Classic Sonic apparently shows up and Tails says "Oh, you're that Sonic from another dimension, Yeah, that makes 100% Total Accurate Not Bullshit Sense" which makes no sense at all considering we have no clue how we got there. Later, Tails joins up with Modern Sonic, OC and the Rebels and mostly it's just boring from there. Sonic makes a joke about how it's been Generations (GEDDIT IT'S A THROWBACK TO GENERATIONS!11) and it's cringey as all hell. It's not until we get to the big city that things start turning for the worst again. Eggman decides to pull something out of his ass then after Sonic meets him called Null Space that's apparently something you can't get out of. Sonic gets out of it immediately with OC. Also Tail's instead of going "SONIC NOOOO!!!11" goes "How can this be!? I thought we did Blah Blah Blah!" Way to be concerned with your friend pal. This is a Deus Ex Machin if I ever seen one as Sonic just blasts out of Null Space because why not. Then, oh god... The rebels, Sonic, Classic Sonic, OC and a hundred cut and paste generic OC Characters get together for the final "Epic" battle. First, everything is wrong. It's just the same OCS copy and pasted over and over again making me not care for them at all because they are literally the exact same. The charge is just embarassing and one of the worst things I have ever seen in a game. The fighting is also not exciting. Everyone seems to either use Wispons or Hand to hand Combat and it's just boring as fuck. The whole story led up to this and then... WAIT OMEGA IS BACK!? Yes, for some reason, Omega is now turned on and is ready to fight even though he couldn't possibly have known where the fight was taking place. What the actual fuck. Basically, the story is just more boredom from there as you play as Classic Sonic and OC as everyone starts brooding how they're going to die. Then, the big bad null space goes away and then we fight Infinite who is easy as hell and then you fight Eggman and apparently kill him. He's not seen going to jail after he has been beaten or people throwing rocks at him for being a dick, he just dies and that's it. Wow. That's kind of dark. Then it becomes incredibly stupid again. Classic Sonic fades away for some reason without any explanation of the science of it from Tails, the genius in science and engineering. Sonic throws a blatant and convoluted message at the audience and Tails then says the worst thing ever: "True Dat" Fuck you Sonic Team. So, the story is a gigantic epic fucking failure of behemoth proportions that couldn't have been saved because Sonic Team was on crack this whole time. Or could it? How would I have written the story to Sonic Forces? I would have done it kind of like The Empire Strikes Back. See, Sonic Generations was the light hearted adventures of Sonic and Classic Sonic just like how it was a fun adventure in Star Wars (A New Hope) with Luke, Ben/Obi Wan Kenobi, Han, Leia, Chewy, C-3PO and R2-D2. This should have been the dark horse of the series. The story should have been much more darker, while having a few funny moments here and there. The dialogue should be semi serious like a Marvel Movie, the villain should be three dimensional and tragic instead of edgy edgelord who cuts peoples hearts out with his brooding edginess. So basically, here is the ten things they could have done: 1. Have Sonic actually been tortured for months at the start, show him bruised up and lost some of his power. 2. Have the villain be a tragic hero who helps Sonic and the team defeat Eggman and realize he is not a slave to him. 3. Cut the kiddy crap and have actual edge. Not too much, just enough to make people actually care about what's going on. 4. Have a bunch of the OC characters look different and make them have back stories and personalities or quips like "Before the war I was baker, now I live in poverty because the economy crashed" 5. Don't make the story so fast paced, it makes everything feel disjointed as all hell. 6. Have Tails use actual science to explain things about Infinite, Classic Sonic, Null Space, that stuff instead of being a useless twat. 7. Have the OC Character talk and have some interesting dialogue and interactions with the Rebels. 8. Cut all the filler crap, it just makes the story and the gameplay boring to play and watch. 9. Make Omega a bigger part of the story. Why is Tail's repairing Omega? Is he significant at all? Can he possibly stop Eggman and Infinite? 10. None of that assinine dialogue meme crap like "True Dat" or Knuckles being a dumbass. Have actual character conversations and dialogue and some funny quips here and there to contrast the dark with the light. These things could at least make the story decent, if not interesting and pretty good. I'm not saying I want a Goodfellas story or Citizen Kane performances, I just want the story to not be so idiotic and brain dead. Everything about Sonic Forces story sucks (including the Shadow DLC, but that's a whole nother story), but that doesn't mean it's an entirely bad game. The graphics and good for the most part, the environments are colorful and classic, the handling of characters feels okay, the gameplay is short burst and fun. The only other complaint I have is that the game should have been longer. I hope you understand where I come from when making this critique. It's not to bash on Sonic or trash this game, it's to tell you how not to write a story and how not to do dialogue. Hopefully, Sonic Team will learn their lesson and make another Hybrid Sonic game with actual heart and edge to it. But not too much edge.

[rantsaboutponies]

My Little Pony: The Movie

Yes, this is the 2017 one I’m talking about. I’m not going to pull a switcheroo and review the 1986 one. Like I said, bad title.

If you want to read along while watching the movie, you may do so as long as you’re not in a theater. DO NOT LOOK AT YOUR PHONE IN THE THEATER. I don’t care if you turned the brightness down or if you hold it in your lap; EVERYONE CAN STILL SEE IT. YOU’RE BEING AN ASSHOLE.

Anyway, on with the review! Spoilers abound, so fair warning!

Oh, and this movie is rated PG for “mild action”. What the hell is wrong with you, MPAA?

Good lord, the absolute grandiosity of the title logo... All right, all right, I’m not going to nitpick something as minor as the logo. Calm down.

My thought process: “Hey, this synth bit sounds kinda like the intro to ‘We Got the Beat’ by The Go-Go’s. I wonder if they realize that.”

Two seconds later: “OH, FUCK, IT IS. IT IS THAT SONG. NO. STOP. STOP RIGHT NOW. RRRRRGGGGGHHHH.”

Well, THAT threw me for a loop! Holy shit, am I glad the show’s budget isn’t large enough to include covers of popular songs.

Ah, we’re showcasing the new animation with a flyover/through of Canterlot. I’m not going to be mentioning the animation quality every other paragraph (even though I could), so instead I’ll just say everything up front. I mentioned in an earlier post that it looked like the animators were suddenly unaware of how to use the program, as though they had all traded jobs or something. It turns out that wasn’t far off! According to sources, the animation software being used on this movie is Toon Boom Harmony, not Flash, so the animators working on this movie are either 1. the same animators using an unfamiliar program, or 2. different animators who are used to working with Harmony but are not used to animating this show. And if you look at the stuff they’ve worked on, they’re all either just 2D (The Simpsons, The Congress) or just 3D (The SpongeBob Movie: Sponge Out of Water), not anything that has attempted to integrate both. The opening shot of the ponies flying through the clouds and through Canterlot looks like 2D assets trying to move through a 3D environment! It doesn’t help that the 3D assets (like the buildings and the landscape) are all really, really cheap-looking, like they were resources saved from a movie from 10-20 years ago and never updated. Also, the 3D assets tend to move fluidly (like 3D assets do), whereas the 2D assets attached to the same figure move with a lower framerate (like 2D assets do), which is a little jarring.

And holy crap, look at those two characters walk towards the screen! That’s some first-year animation student work right there!

Okay, okay, I said I wasn’t going to harp on the animation the whole time. Fine. Instead, here’s a complaint I’m sure will sound familiar to regular readers: Wow, you really like your exposition dumps right out of the gate, don’t you, writers? Except this time, you don’t have the excuse of “Well, we only had 22 minutes, so we had to get all the information out there quickly!” This movie is 99 minutes long! That’s four-and-a-half times the length! At this point, it’s just sloppy!

Random pony: Princess Twilight is great under pressure!

Twilight: Oh, my goodness, I can’t handle this!

Trombone: Wah-wah!

Oh, goddamnit, are we bringing back the wah-wah jokes? Son of a...

GAH! That closeup shot of Twilight is just creepy! Adding more details just because you’re closer to a subject isn’t always the best idea!

“What’chu talkin’ ‘bout?” FUCK STOP FUCK STOP FUCK STOP FUCK

Still creepy! Why do her eyes look like that? This is unsettling! Please stop focusing on her face!

Ha, Pinkie Pie was blowing a balloon into the camera, and then she turned and revealed it’s actually a really long balloon, but we couldn’t see that because of the angle we were watching from! Ha ha ha! ...Was...was that meant to be a joke? Because I really can’t figure out what other reason you would have to show it that way. These new animators are bizarre.

Oh, hey, she was making Discord! He’s not actually in the movie, but, you know, fanservice!

All right, Angel dressed as a parrot made me chuckle, but why the hell would Fluttershy force him to do that?

“Faster if I do my Sonic Rainboom!” How? How would that help you complete this task any faster? What sense does that make? Oh, wait, don’t tell me...fanservice.

“Raised in a barn!” Yes, thank you. You have beaten that joke thoroughly into the ground by now. Please move on.

Ah, good, Pinkie Pie is continuing her trend of being loud, irritating, and making things worse by opening her stupid face. Some things haven’t changed.

Okay, this is two songs in the first eight minutes. Just how many are there?

“Eeyup!” HE SAID IT.

Yeah, you can show me Cheese Sandwich all you want. I know “Weird Al” isn’t in this movie.

Security guard #1: “Do you have visual on the buttercream?”

Security guard #2: “Visual confirmed, go for cleanup.”

...

Audience: *cough*

I mean, they left in a pause for laughter and everything. They were expecting that to get a laugh.

Balloon: *gets squished*

Random background pony: Bryan! Noooooo!

Me: 

I don’t...I’m not...are these...jokes? I’m...I...

You’d think they’d have heard of this villain. He seems like he has a wide sphere of influence.

“There’s one of you! And hundreds of us!” Yes, Luna, I’m sure they brought that giant airship because there’s only one of them. This is why you’re not in charge.

Wow, the, uh...the crystals forming over Cadence are, um...am I allowed to say anything more about the animation?

DURR HURR IT’S FUNNY BECAUSE THEY THOUGHT THEY GOT TWILIGHT BUT IT WAS ACTUALLY DERPY AND ANYTHING INVOLVING DERPY IS FUNNY. FAAAAAAANSERRRRRRVIIIIIIIIIICE.

Every word out of this minion’s mouth makes me want to punch him. It’s Michael Peña’s best role since CHiPs! Apparently he ad-libbed most of his dialogue. It shows.

“Yay.” SHE SAID IT.

“Boingy boingy boingy boingy!” UGH.

Pinkie Pie: “Anypony up for a game of I Spy?”

Everypony else: “UGH.”

See? SEE?! I’m not the only one! She’s even starting to annoy the other main characters by this point! What are you even doing?

So Tempest got...a phone call...except it’s not a phone call, it’s a potion that you pour into a brazier...but it still has a ringtone...and it sounds like a dial-up connection... How do they use it more than once? Also, FUCK YOU WITH YOUR STUPID FUCKING

Why does the Storm King’s emblem look like the Starcraft II logo?

“Sorry, bad spell service.” FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU

Meanwhile, in the town from Assassin’s Creed...

“Hmm. Interesting.” Well, I know someone who’s getting a lot of furry fetish fanart made of him!

“I’ll take the picture of your sister!” Heh. Okay, movie. That’s two.

Wow, Taye Diggs’s voice does not fit that character design.

“...parts will fall off.” Did the guy immediately grab for his crotch when he said that? Wow, movie! Where’s your PG for “mild rude humor”?

Someone should tell the animators that Spike isn’t pursuing Rarity anymore. Since, like, Season 2.

Oh, god, don’t sing! I was kind of starting to like you, Capper! This doesn’t really seem in-character!

Why does it seem like this character would have been Discord if they hadn’t “redeemed” him like three times by this point?

Yes, Fluttershy is afraid of bats. Great knowledge of the character there, movie.

“Ooh! So many fun breakables!” Fuck you, Pinkie.

Good lord, Emily Blunt really could be intimidating if she weren’t undercut by Michael Peña at every fucking TURN! It’s the slugs from Epic all over again!

Yes, “The Girl from Ipanema”. A common song all throughout Equestria or the Badlands or whatever. The random popular songs interspersed throughout a movie (based on a show that does not HAVE them) that also has its own original songs really do not fit! They really don’t! Just because you can afford it now doesn’t mean you have to do it.

“WAIT!” *random cat noise* That...might have made sense if you didn’t play those two sounds at the same time. I’m not sure how he could talk and yowl simultaneously. Come on, sound editors.

Boy, how convenient that Tempest found them at that exact point, huh?

Y’know, showing Pinkie Pie grinning like an idiot as they’re all running for their lives doesn’t exactly endear me to her, animators.

Oh, no! Pinkie fell! What a tragedy! Maybe if you let her die, she wouldn’t keep fucking up your shit!

GOD, I HATE THIS FUCKING MINION.

Bird Guy: “We scar ‘em...”

Rarity: *gasp*

Bird Guy: “...emotionally!”

Fluttershy: *cries*

Pff... All right, you got me! That one was actually worth an audible laugh! That makes you three for...I don’t know, fifty?

I have a serious question. Was this supposed to be released in 3D, but then they dropped that for some reason? There seems to be a lot of “stuff coming straight toward the camera” action.

Are we seriously still doing the “people trying to kill each other stop when the shift whistle blows” joke? That was old 50 years ago!

I’m not sure I’ve seen a musical with songs this...out of nowhere. I mean, I’m sure worse examples exist, but none that I’m familiar with.

Are these pirates supposed to be...giant parrots (because, y’know, pirates and parrots)? Why does this world have giant parrots? Everything in the entire series is the size it is in the real world. Including the parrots we saw earlier in the movie! Why giant parrots?

Ah, good, Rainbow Dash is still a FUCKING IDIOT. Glad you’re keeping that change from the show, too!

So let me get this straight. Storm King is concerned about projecting an image of fearsomeness and strength...but he sells bobbleheads of himself as merchandise? You know, you don’t have to be this stupid, movie! You don’t! You really don’t!

GOD, they need to stop showing closeups of their faces. THEY’RE. SO. CREEPY.

“Oh, this is inteeeeeense!” WELL, IT MIGHT HAVE BEEN IF YOU HADN’T SAID THAT. LET A MOMENT LAND, MOVIE. LET. A MOMENT. FUCKING. LAND.

Oh, good, here’s where that terrifying shot from the trailer comes in.

And Rarity stopped to look at herself in the mirror while falling to her death. HURR HURR HURR.

Oh, look! Pinkie is about to get them killed again! GET RID OF HER.

“That’s it! I simply cannot even!” Oh, fuck off. Whoever wrote that line, fuck off.

“I hate epic adventures!” I’m sure starting to.

Wow, Twilight, you held your breath for, like, 10 seconds. Good job.

Well, here it is. We knew it was coming. Seaponies. Honestly, even though I should be annoyed (because FANSERVICE), they actually fit this world pretty well (way better than giant anthropomorphic cats or whatever the hell the inhabitants of that Badlands city were).

But then they turn the Mane Six into seaponies.

And I’m reminded of “The Crystal Empire (Part 2)”.

And you only introduced these characters to sell new toys of the Mane Six, didn’t you?

And fuck you.

“Yay.” SHE SAID IT. AGAIN.

Don’t sing. Please don’t sing. I think what makes these songs even more out-of-nowhere is the fact that all the other non-pony characters are immediately in on the song, no matter how they were feeling or what they were doing right before it started.

Um...Twilight’s not wrong, you guys! Everyone you’ve come across so far has tried to fuck you over! Including the seaponies! Why wouldn’t she just try to steal the thing?

But, of course, she wouldn’t get captured if everyone else didn’t leave her all alone to mark the act break. The rest of them are even seen sitting on a gray and dismal seashore afterwards! Jesus Christ, it’s like all the tropes from Scriptwriting for Children’s Movies 101 are in this thing! You are allowed to try harder than this, you know!

Twilight: Why are you doing this? You’re a pony, like me!

Me: I’m nothing like you!

Tempest: I’m nothing like you!

Me: Come on!

Oh, god, don’t sing. I can hear the lead-in. I can see you want to express your emotions and fill in your backstory so badly! Please don’t! Please don’t please don’t please don’t AGGGGGHHHHH

Man, I bet when the Ursa Major scratched her face, Tempest bled so! Ha! ...I’m sorry.

Are you kidding me? She has the same character motivation as Starlight Glimmer? Her friends (all two of them) left her in one particular incident, so now she’s sworn off friendship forever (instead of just, I don’t know, finding new friends? You had to have had more than two.)

Hold on, did Tempest...beam that flashback into Twilight’s head? Because otherwise, I don’t know how she would have gathered that information.

“Well, look what the cat dragged in! Himself!” Um...burn?

NO. BULLSHIT. HOW DID THEY ESCAPE? HOW? IT DOESN’T COUNT IF YOU DON’T SHOW IT. WHY WOULD YOU CUT OUT A POTENTIALLY AWESOME ACTION SCENE FOR THIS SHIT? NO. FUCK YOU.

Then again, there are only five pirates left. I guess the rest were slaughtered.

Honestly, the Storm King just looks like Tirek. They might as well have reused him.

Boy, I haven’t seen Liev Schreiber play such an nonthreatening villain since X-Men Origins: Wolverine. Blast from the past! I’m glad he’s been in the movie so much up to this point so that I actually give a shit about him being the main bad guy for the last 20 minutes!

Uh-huh. And where were the other two pirates hiding? Only three jumped out of that cake.

The guard was taken down by...cupcakes. Do you even care anymore?

HOLY FUCK PINKIE’S FACE IS TERRIFYING. NEVER SHOW ANYTHING LIKE THAT AGAIN. YOU ARE SERIOUSLY GOING TO GIVE CHILDREN NIGHTMARES.

And he’s using Spike like a flamethrower. He can’t...oh, whatever.

Why does she even need her horn restored? She seems pretty powerful as she is.

“Why are you saving me?” “Because this is what friends do.” No, this is what decent fucking people do! if you’re about to watch someone die and you can do something to prevent it, you don’t have to be their friend to do so! You just have to be not a sociopath!

Oh, no! Twilight flew off with the main villain! She’s dead for sure! Oh, what? She’s not? What a shock. Nice heavy-handed angelic imagery, by the way.

Couldn’t she have blasted the XBOX rock out of the way or grabbed it or something instead of letting it hit her?

“So...now what?” “Now we rebuild.” No, wait, that’s the ending from San Andreas. A much better movie, I might add.

OH, THE FIRST ONE THEY DECALCIFIED WAS DERPY. EVERYTHING IS DERPY. DERPY DERPY DERPY.

Okay, who the hell was the “Way to go, guys!” pony? That was very obviously supposed to be someone specific, but I am unaware of this behind-the-scenes tidbit.

So they unfroze everypony, but they still didn’t fix Tempest’s horn? What a bunch of dicks!

“You know, your horn is pretty powerful, just like the pony it belongs to.” Didn’t I say that? What the hell was the conflict here?

That’s what you end the movie on, eh? Pinkie Pie’s squealing? Okey dokey then.

AND DERPY’S IN THE CREDITS TOO HERF DERF WERF LERF

And, of course, no kids’ movie would be complete without LUKAS GRAAAAAAAHAM.

Wait, Rachel Platten sang that cover of “We Got the Beat”? The singer who gave us “Fight Song”? Well, no wonder it sucked!

Rating: 1/4 stars.

This movie had a review embargo on it on Rotten Tomatoes until the release date. That’s never a good sign.

I think maybe they thought that, by making the movie darker, it would make it more suitable for theatrical viewing. It doesn’t. It’s just...odd. Especially when they add really stupid jokes to lighten the tone.

I can say that you can probably see the movie without having seen the show, which is a positive. There aren’t any plot details that require outside information to understand, but WOW is there enough fanservice if that’s what you’re looking for. In fact, it might be better if you haven’t seen the show because boy, oh, boy, do they introduce a lot of characters that the ponies on the show would definitely be aware of if this made any sense. On that note, if this is set in the canon Equestria from the show, then holy shit are the ponies the most callous and/or oblivious sociopaths I’ve ever seen in a children’s program. Not only are they all apparently completely unaware of the fact that everything outside of Equestria is complete shit (aside from the fact that everywhere seems to be impoverished, they’re all totally oblivious to the fact that the Storm King has taken over THE REST OF THE WORLD), but they don’t actually fix that by the end! I guess the hippogriffs can come out of hiding now, and the Storm King’s faceless henchmen all seem to be good guys at the end since they’re all at the party, but for all we know, the badlands are still inhabited entirely by goblin monster things and their shady black market shit! We never saw what happened to them! And if the parrots are now all pirates instead of merchants, does that mean they’re going to start robbing everyone? Congratulations, Rainbow Dash! You’ve significantly increased the amount of crime across the entire world! Good job, you fucking idiot!

Twilight is ridiculously selfish, which is really odd considering we know she knows better by this point. Her moral in this movie is that she has to learn to rely on her friends and not just try to do everything based on her own effort and ideas. Y’know, AGAIN. How many fucking times has Twilight had to learn this lesson over and over and over again? And people say that Fluttershy’s episodes are repetitive.

I was hoping that at some point I would become used to the animation. For comparison, Fantastic Mr. Fox has a really ugly animation style, but you don’t really think anything of it after the first 20-30 minutes. That never happened with this movie. Every time I thought I was getting used to the animation style, someone would turn or move or make a face, and it would just look creepy or just plain awful again.

You know what’s kind of sad, though? Emily Blunt is really good in this. She’s really putting in a lot of effort for this character, and the design is pretty good, too! She’s actually kind of awesome, especially compared to Liev Schreiber (who so could not have given less of a shit about his role) and Michael Fucking Peña, who are just terrible. Even if I didn’t entirely understand her nonsensical motivation, Tempest was honestly the best part of the movie.

Boy, between this and Leap!, if an animated movie advertises that it “features an original song by Sia”, run!

[two-in-one-skele]

Every Star Needs a Night

Prev || Next

We are now almost three weeks past the first day since G and Yumi have been basically roommates. Times are getting cooler and the streets are betting snowier as we approach Christmas. But, even with all this freezing cold weather, it was busy outside, filled with people either preparing to go on trips or shopping for presents for the holidays. 

Through this particularly snowy day, a man walked through the streets to do neither of these things. With his hair matching the times he heads in... wait, that’s Yumi’s house! Oh, no.

- “I’m hooooooooooome!” says the unknown stranger.

His yelling woke G up and he sat up to see who could that be. It definitely wasn’t Yumi, the voice was much more boyish and lower pitched, almost nasally. As he sat up, he was face to face to a human with white hair with black highlights, green eyes and a bit paler than Yumi. Actually, wasn’t that the exact description of her-

- “WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU!?” he yells very aggressively.

Meanwhile, Yumi was at her job in the StarDust Planetarium. She usually doesn’t work on the weekends, but someone took in sick. She was mildly annoyed by this, but since her friend was also working today and she only had to be in the ticket booth for a few hours it wasn’t too much of a hassle. Speaking of said friend, she poked Yumi’s shoulder out of nowhere to get her intention. Considering Yumi was lost in her thoughts it made her jolt.

“Reeen! Don’t scare me like that!” she scolds turning towards her friend. //”Ahahaha! Sorry, Yumi. Didn’t mean to scare ye. I got some new fer ye.” “...? What is it?” she tilted her head curiously.

Ren Deary was a mixed breed of a deer, bunny and cat boss monster. Her fur war beige, she had small horns on her head with bunny-like ears, most of her facial features and paws were closer to a cat, although her tail was like a deer’s. She wasn’t part of Yumi’s brother’s band, but her boyfriend and her friend, who shared a polyamorous relationship with her boyfriend, were members of it. Hence she sometimes worked as a sort of messenger between Yumi and her brother, Yoru. This was one of those cases.

//”It’s about yer brother and the others.” Ren says with a worrying smile. “Did something bad happen?” Yumi asks, worried. //”Well... kinda. They’re sorta in a pickle. The police almost caught them the other day...” she scratches her head. “What!? Was it because of--?” //“Aye... Nami’s parents.” she crosses her arms. “... Are they okay?” she asks, even more worried. //“Aye. They just need ta lay low fer a while. Soooo... they decided to come back in town! In fact, yer brother is here today! Ain’t that great?” she quickly changes to an excited smile. “Shit...” she mumbles //”Wha--?” “I-I gotta go! I-I’ll be back soon!” she says, panicked.

Yumi quickly runs outside and heads towards her house. If he arrives with G there he’ll-- oh god, it’ll be bad. The worrying thig is, she was not too far off what she thought would happen. They are already in a tense situation as we speak.

Yoru grabs a large knife in the kitchen as he thought G was a criminal who barged in Yumi’s house. He is ready to attack the “intruder” but still keeps his distance. G, on the other hand, was still sort of half asleep and trying to assess the situation. He thought for a second that it was a dream but... the human’s eyes was slowly turning redder. Dream or not he was in danger.

-”Did you do something to Yumi!? WHERE IS SHE?” Yoru yells aggressively. *Wait, what?? G replies, worried and confused. -”Oh, so you don’t know who’s house you just barged into!? Okay then... where the fuck is the woman who lives here? Tell me before I fucking make some more cracks in your skull!” he points the knife threateningly. *Jesus fucking Christ I-... she’s at work, dude! he says a little panicked. -”... Heh... Hehehehahaha. At work? ... you fucking liar.”

Before G could even respond, Yoru dashed towards him with the knife, attempting to attack him. With barely enough time for his reflexes, G barely manages to stop him from hitting anything too damaging by both turning Yoru’s soul blue and blocking the knife in between his hand hole. However, even with his pretty good reflexes, they manage to fall on the ground but, thankfully, in the same position.

-”So are you going to me the truth now...? Or are you going to continue lying!? I’ll ask you one last time... WHERE. IS. MY. SISTER? he demanded. *Fuck, man. I already fucking told you! he started to shout. -”You’re a liar... YOU’RE A LIAR AND YOU KNOW IT!

Yoru tries to push the knife further into his hand. G manages to stop him, even though it didn’t really budge much, it still hurt like shit. He grabbed Yoru’s wrist to stop him from moving too much, squeezing it as tightly as he could. Even with that, it did cut pretty deep, his hand was bleeding out DT a little. It was too painful for him to concentrate enough on his Blue Magic. Yoru’s eyes were glowing redder by the second, he needed to say something and quick before he loses control.

*Listen, guy, your sister got called in because someone announced sick at the last minute. She’s just replacing them, dammit! he said, starting to get a little pissed-off as well. -”SO WHAT? Why should I even BELIEVE you!?” *BECAUSE, you fucking idiot, I DON’T want to HURT you! I could’ve thrown you across the damn wall, but I DIDN’T! I’m not your fuckin’ enemy, as much as your name sounds really fucking stupid. he admitted, fairly aggressively.

“He’s not wrong...” Yoru thought. He knows very well the abilities of Blue Magic and their effects. He’s never seen them in person before, but he should have been easily beaten by this man who’s “aura” was much more powerful than him. Maybe even more than it’s user even knows. He lessened his strength on G’s hand hole, however, he just realized something. Did he just say his name was stupid?

-”Wait... e x u s e   m e ?” he asks passive-aggressively. *I’m sorry, but... your name is really dumb. It sounds like a cheesy superhero name a kid would create as a character. he said, flatly. -”W h a t ? What the fuck is wrong with the name ‘Yoru’!?” 

He was confused, but also kind of angry. I mean, who wouldn’t be? However, it seems this confusion is mutual. What?

*Wait what? Your name is ‘Yoru’? I thought it was-... -”What the fuck did you think it was!?” he asks angrily. *Uhh... Hyper... So-... Something...? I don’t remember it was so fuckin- -”HYPER SO-!? Pfff-heheeHAHAHEEHAHA H-HYPER FUCKING SONIC!?” he burst laughing. *Y-yes, thats what- -”HHHEHEEHEEHAHAHAHAHA!”

G was even more confused. Yoru, on the other hand, was laughing hysterically. He couldn’t believe his name was- what the fuck did his sister tell him!? It was so fucking funny though, it was like he completely forgotten about his previous anger and aggressively towards G in an instant. His laugh was much more tolerable, in a sense, than his sister’s though. It resembled more like an actual laugh or, in this case, a loud and quick giggle. Okay, yeah, he believed him now. Only his sister would’ve done a stupid reference like that.

He removed himself from G, sitting on the sofa and was about to ask him the question, but he was cut off by him, as he also wanted to ask seemingly even more important questions. He was more confused than Yoru.

*I mean... that’s what she told me. I probably should’ve known it was too stupid to be your actual name... Sorry about that. -”H-no, it’s okay. I guess you didn’t get her Sonic reference.” he giggled. *Yeah, well... what the fuck is a ‘Sonic’? he asked.

He wheezed and started laughing again. Holy fucking shit. He couldn’t breathe anymore he could barely even stand. G was even more confused. I mean, what did he say that was so funny? Well, unfortunately, he didn’t even understand the accidental “meme” he just referenced by pure coincidence. However, that’s what made it funnier to Yoru. 

However, G was weirdly glad that he was laughing, he can’t really help it, he loved seeing people genuinely laugh. Even if said person tried to kill him earlier with more or less of a good reason. Speaking of which, his hand suddenly started to burn again as it was bleeding a bit more from the cut Yoru made earlier.

-”Ah, shit I totally forgot. I’m really sorry about that!” said Yoru, nervously. *N-no it’s fine. I-I’ll live. G painfully replied. -”Give me your hand, I can heal you.” he insisted. *No, I- -”Give me your hand!”he shouted in a commanding tone.

G hesitated of obeying him. I mean, he didn’t exactly trust humans, it doesn’t help that this one in particular tried to kill him earlier. Besides, as much as he may be a wizard, compared to his sister, he’s probably not that good in magic either. He gave in, in the end and, to his surprise, it seemed like he probably judged this man too quickly. The large cut in his hand hole was slowly closing up as healing magic surrounded their hands.

-”Are you surprised? I’m much better in magic than my sister.” he giggles. *Y-yeah.. I could te- OW! -”Yeah, sorry, it might hurt sometimes. I mean, I did cut deep in your bones. It’s harder to heal.” he chuckles nervously. *Well, you could’ve told me that. he replies a bit passive-aggressively. -”Haha! My bad.” he laughs even more nervously. *...

This man was strange. Despite being seemingly as kind as his sister, G just couldn’t shake the feeling of being creeped out by him. He just couldn’t really put a finger on it. But maybe he might be a little bias, partially for a good reason. Either way, it didn’t take long before his hand was healed. It, unfortunately, left a scar, though, but he didn’t really mind it was barely visible and anyways he had worse scars, for one, the ones on his face.

-”Here you go! You’re all-”

There was a sudden thud, a multitude of them, they were quick and seemingly getting closer. Then the door was unlocking itself, nervously and violently opening. Yoru quickly held a grip on the knife he previously had, just in case. However, it was not needed as finally a familiar face had almost violently and quickly opened the door. It was Yumi, who had an extremely panicked and distressed look on her face.

“YORU, PLEASE DON’T KILL G!” she yelled. -”It’s too late, he’s already dead.” he giggles. *I-I’m right here! he says, immediately getting up from the floor. “Aaah, thank fucking God...!” she sighed, relieved.

It was a little worrisome that Yoru could just laugh off a joke like that, but what was even more worrisome is that it seemed like it was a recurring theme. What the hell did he get himself into? Suddenly he was mildly afraid about staying here. However, Yoru joyful expression quickly turned into nervousness.

-”Aaah... but... I did attack him, though. Sorry.” he scratches the back of his head. “Yoru!” she scolds him. -“Sorry! I just thought he was a burglar or something.” “A-are you hurt?” she asks, turning towards G. *I mean... I’m fine, now. “What did you do?” she turns back to her brother with a stern glare. -”I-I cut his hand hole a bit... b-but I healed it! Everything’s fine now, I swear!” he replies nervously.

She still glared at him a bit more, but let out a sigh of relief afterward. She was glad no one was hurt, really. She probably should’ve told her brother about him. I mean, its almost been a month, now.

“Um... I kinda need to tell you something.” she finally said. -”Oh! I need to tell you something too! But... you should probably go back to work, don’t you think?” he reminded. “OH SHIT!”

She just realized that she’s been away for a long time. Sure, it wasn’t that far but running there would take a good 10 minutes and, excluding the time she’s spent here, that’s 20 minutes wasted. She immediately ran out of the house cursing to herself. It was pretty funny for G and Yoru to see her as frantic.

-”Anyway, you name was G, right?” asks Yoru. *Yeah? -”What’s it stands for? ... George, maybe?”  *Heh, no. It’s not short for anythin’, it’s just... ‘G’. he chuckles. -”Oh! I thought it was a nickname or something... Well, ‘G’, how long has it been?” he asks, grinning. *3 weeks... I think? -”That long? I can’t believe she didn’t call to tell me you two were in a relationship all this time!” he pouts. *W-wait what? We’re not- we’ve MET 3 weeks ago!  -”Oooh! H-ho my god, I’m so sorry! I really thought you were- oh my god, this is awkward.” he laughs. *Geez... -”Okay, okay, so- how did you guys meet? And-... what are you doing at her place if you’ve basically just met? I mean, technically it’s been a while but... she usually doesn’t let people in her house this early! Uh-... no offence.” he explains, apologetically. *None taken... actually, it’s probably because we didn’t meet under “usual” circumstances. he admits. -”Oooo! So what happened?”

G sits down on the sofa next to him, basically preparing to explain everything. Yoru turned himself towards him, crossing his legs and laying his arm over the sofa’s back, laying his head on his hand. It was odd to see a human man act sort of “girl-ish”, not that it was a bad thing or anything, but G knows very well how humans treat this sort of thing, which he always thought was stupid, all monsters did. 

Anyways, G started to explain how he and Yumi met. He briefly mentioned how he was recently kicked out of his previous apartment before meeting her, Yoru didn’t exactly know where the story was going, but it was clear that he wasn’t exactly pleased. After G had mentioned that they were living together that’s when the protective brother side of Yoru came back out full force. His eyes were slowly turning reddish over his normal green, crossing his arms and legs, but trying his best t not get mad again. Despite seeing that the other was still trying his best to keep calm, G didn't know if it was safe to continue the story. Which is understandable, considering what happened previously. This man had a shorter fuse than he has.

*Uh... trust me, I’ve never done or thought of doing anythin’ inappropriate to your sister. I’m not that kinda guy. he tried to reassure Yoru. -”... Yeah, okay... I’ll believe you. I’m sorry it’s just that-... she’s all I have, y’know? You can’t really blame me for being really protective of her. Right...?” he tried his best to give a friendly smile. *No, I understand. Besides... I’m kinda a random stranger, after all. I mean... I guess we’re kinda friends but... y’know? Besides... this is only temporary. he smiled back a little awkwardly.

Yoru’s smile saddened a little, slightly twisting his lips sideways. Sure, he didn’t the idea but, G saying something like that was sad. It was almost like ending a friendship before it even started. He remembered that Yumi doesn’t really have many friends, maybe this could be a good opportunity. He shouldn’t be mad about this, anyway, she was an adult and she probably knows what she’s doing. Plus, G didn’t seem like a bad guy, they could be great friends, maybe even...

-”... Be good to my sister... alright?” he said softly yet almost like an order. *U-uh wha--? Oh. Y-yeah... sure. he replies, nervously and awkwardly.

G wasn’t sure where that came from or what he meant by that. It was kind of out of nowhere and caught him off guard, he didn’t want to assume anything so he tried not to think about it or question it. There was a short awkward silence until the doorbell suddenly rang again.

-”Oh! They’re here!” Yoru shouts, enthusiastically. *Who? he asks, confused. -”You know, my band!” he says heading towards the door. *Oh... wait, WHAT?

Suddenly, as Yoru opens the door, four different monsters come in the house. Oh, fuck, this is bad.

>WHAT UP, FUCKERS!< yells the short dark frog-like monster. ~Frederick, do not sshout like that. There are people downsstairs.~ says the gray taller female monster. -”Heeey guys! What took you so long?” [Sorry, we had a little problem. You know... humans and such.] signed the tallest lion-like male monster. °°... Hello.°° said quietly the shorter pale fish-like female monster. -”Come in! Come in!” he insisted cheerfully.

As they go further into the living room and spot G, they all simultaneously look confused. He nervously looks at all of them, he’s not exactly used to being overwhelmed with company, especially strangers. They all look at him in awe like he was some kind of creature in the zoo that was near extinction. It was strange, they were strange, everything about this was strange.

*U-uh... hey. -”Alright guys, stop staring so much, I think you’re intimidating him. You should probably introduce yourselves.” he chuckles. >I’ll start first! I’m Frederick, but y’can call me Fred, Freddy, Rick, Ricky or ANYTHIN’ YOU WANT, really! Oh! And I’m the drummer!< says the frog monster, ecstatic.  °°... I am... Nami, the guitarist.°° says the pale fish monster, shy and reserved with a quiet voice. ~My name is Ssyl Monobuss. I am Frederick’ss adoptive mother and Nami’ss Aunt, as well as the keyboardist of this band.~ said the taller gray female monster with a kind smile, revealing her sharp teeth. [And I am Roland Barry. Syl’s boyfriend and the bassist of this group. Oh, I am sorry, I forgot to ask if he understood me.] signed the tall lion-like monster, completely indifferent. *Oh, no, that’s fine, I can read ASL. And uh... well... it's nice to meet you all. I’m G. he presented himself a bit awkwardly. >Oh shiet, just one letter? That’s so fuckin’ cool! Or... y’have a really bad name and y’don’t wanna tell us!< she giggles mischievously. ~Frederick...~ *No, no it's okay. I actually, uh... well... it’s complicated but, I basically chose the name myself. he admitted. >Ooooh! Nice choice, m’dude!< she snickers. *Thanks...? °°... Where’s Yumi...?°° asks Nami, a little sad. -”Oh, she’s working... you know, filling someone in.” Yoru explains. ~Sshe won't come back too late will sshe?~ asks Syl, a little worried. *Oh. No. I think she might be back soon actually. [Good, we wont have to wait for too-] >Hey, G-man! Mind if I ask ya a question?< suddenly asks Frederick, cutting Roland. *U-uh, no...? What is it? -”Hey, Freddy, just don’t ask any-” >Did you and Yumi fuck...? she whispers. -”... weird questions...” ~FREDERICK. AMPH.~ yells Syl. °°... g-gross...°° says Nami, extremely embarrassed. [*Internal screaming*] signs Roland, despite his deadpan expression. >Come on! I was just joking!< she laughs hysterically.

Holy fucking shit, this was probably the weirdest and most embarrassing experience G has ever been through. He tried his best not to die on the inside, flushing uncontrollably and hiding his face with his hands that are extremely horrible at hiding your face behind, considering the giant hole in his palms. He groaned out of embarrassment, screaming internally. 

Everyone was going nuts, arguing with each other, but mostly with the notorious Frederick, who was still very proud of her act, leaving the poor increasingly blue skeleton to his internal demise. After a few moments, the door suddenly opened. It was Yumi. 

“Hey, who left the-? U-uuuumm...”

She cuts herself from her attempt to scold Yoru for leaving the door open, noticing the rest of the gang suddenly stopped yelling with G in the middle completely blue. Seeing him like that made her a little embarrassed too, despite not knowing why. What the fuck happened?

°°Yumi...!°° Nami ran towards her, hugging her. “O-oh, um, hey Nami. A-anyway, w-what did you guys do to him??” -”W-we didn’t do anything!” reassured Yoru a little panicked. °°Freddy was being gross...°° “W-what!? F-Frederick, w-what did you do!?” she asks, nervously. >Heeey, come on! I said I was joking!< [You don’t want to know.] signed Roland. ”W-well, whatever it is, w-we’re just friends.”  ~You sshould apologize, Frederick. It wass unbelievably rude.~ scolded Syl. >Okaaay... Sorry dude, I probably should've not gone that far. *I-it’s fine... I-I guess? I-I’ll get over it. he shyly reassured.

There was a short awkward silence before Yumi suddenly remembered to ask something. 

“A-anyway, why are you guys all here? Does it have something to do with the thing you wanted to tell me earlier?” she asks, still a little embarrassed. -”Yes, actually!” responded Yoru, enthusiastically. ~Gyftmass is coming in a few dayss, we wanted to go on a trip all of uss together.~ continued Syl. “Really!? Where?”

There was a short moment of silence, everyone seemed happy that she asked this question. It made her even more curious.

“Where???” >We’re goin’ to MOUNT EVERGREEN!< shouted Frederick, energetically. ~Not sso loud, Frederick!~ scolded Syl. [We rented a chalet for us to stay in, it is quite fancy.] signed Roland. “Seriously!? Where did you get all of that money!?” asks Yumi, a bit worried. -”It’s fine, Yumi! I’ve been saving up ever since you told me about it. When I told them, they started saving too! So you don’t need to worry about the cash. Consider it your Christmas Gift from all of us!” Yoru smiled warmly. “Are you sure...?” she asked again, starting to get a little emotional. >Sure we’re sure!< affirmed Frederick, cheerfully. -”We already paid for everything so, you better not abandon us! Besides, I know how much you wanted to go!” he says teased her. “I-I know... it’s just that... I-I’m really thankful a-and happy but... I-I’m sorry.” she started to tear up, sniffling and covering her mouth. ~Oh, Yumi... don’t cry.~

Seeing Yumi starting to cry, they all went to give her a group hug. Well, except for G, who was awkwardly sitting on the sofa, silent the entire time as they were talking about the trip. That’s all he could do really. However, despite not wanting to say anything, he did feel a little lonely as well, as if he was out of place. What the fuck was he doing here?

“Oh, but... w-what about G? I’m not sure if I should leave him here.” she asks, worried. *Uh, no it’s fine. I can stay here, I- -”Of course he can come!” confirms Yoru. ~Ren will not be able to come... she has a trip with her family. Sso we have one sspace free for your friend.~ Syl smiles warmly. *No really, I’ll be fine on my own. he rejects. >Come on! Don’t be a party pooper, G-man, it’ll be fun!< insists Frederick. °°I... agree with Freddy.°° Nami nods. *I-I dunno... I have to tell my boss and- [We could take care of that, if you’d like.] -”Maybe I could help better since I’m a human and all. I know my kind can be rough on monsters.” he smiles wryly *I... “I don’t want to force you. If you can’t go or... if you don’t want to, that’s fine. I just... I mean... n-nevermind.” 

She looked down, a little flustered, tugging on her armless sleeve. They all look at her or a moment, as she doesn’t say anything more than that, but they all understood what she wanted to say. She wanted him to go, it was written all over her face. They all looked back at G, except for Yumi, waiting for his response. Maybe he could’ve said “no” before, but now...

*I... I-I’ll see what I can do. he finally said, nervously. >HELL YEAH!< yelled Frederick, ecstatic. ~If you have any trouble, pleasse do not be afraid to talk to uss.~ [Yoru might be able to find a way to convince your boss, worse comes to worse.] explains Roland. -”Yep, I can always kick his ass, worse comes to worse!” he laughs jokingly. *U-uh, please don’t do that. “U-um... I hope you don’t feel like I forced you to come. I just...” *N-no, its fine. And...thank you to all of you. You’re very kind to just a random stranger. -”Come on, don’t say that. All friends of Yumi’s are friends of ours!”

They all nodded.

*... You’re really all too nice to me.

Despite being a strange bunch, he really was grateful for how nice they were, just like Yumi. He wasn’t sure if he deserved all of this but... this could be fun, right? One day he’ll repay them, for sure.

[thelittlestkitsune]

Play Dates: Part Two. [smut]

A;N: So Chloe @writing-obrien wrote the first part of this collab and she killed it! I’m hoping I did the same! Huge thanks to the lovely @wydobrien for proof reading and making sure it didn’t suck too hard. I love ya’ll and Enjoy! xoxo

Pairing: DaveHodgmanxReader

Author: thelittlestkitsune

Warnings: Smut.

Word count: 5,387

Listen to me.            Read Chloe’s bomb ass part here! 

It’s just a date. You thought to yourself as you sat on the end of the bed, battling with the contents of your wardrobe. I could wear jeans? You looked out the window, noting the blazing hot sun as you cast your jeans back into the depths of your closet. You sat with your head in your hands desperately clutching to any idea of clothing. Fuck it at this point I’m going naked. You looked over the clothes that decorated your bedroom floor. Maybe he’d like it if I went naked. You shook your head, picking up the denim shorts by your feet. These are cute enough? Casual but still hot if I bent over? Perfect, you looked over your floor, picking up a shirt near your desk. Expert level laziness. You stripped yourself of the pajamas you were wearing, letting them fall to the floor beside you. You slipped the shirt over your head, the shorts sliding over your legs before examining the outfit as you looked in the mirror. Not too shabby. You quickly applied makeup as Stevie ran rampant through the hallway.  

He came crashing through your door, his face smeared with chocolate from earlier in the day. “I thought I told you to wash your face!” You sighed as you walked over to him, abandoning your vanity and chasing after him. “I did already!” He shouted, his feet thundering across the wooden floor. “Don’t tell porkies Stevie! You know what Umbridge made Harry do when she thought he was lying!” You laughed as Stevie stopped dead in his tracks. “YOU WOULDN’T!” he screeched, his face drained of color. His eyes welled up, his lip quivering as he balled his fists up. You stopped walking towards him, your face softening as you glimpsed the tears in his eyes. “Stevie, do you think I’m as horrible as her?” He shook his head, his hair flopping over his eyes. “Exactly! But don’t tell porkies!” You crossed the short space towards him, poking him in the side before tickling him. “Tell me the truth then?” He pouted, avoiding your stare as he stayed silent. “I got some more ice cream from the freezer. I didn’t want to tell you because it was yours and I ate it.” He stared at the ground as you smiled. “So you didn’t lie? You did wash your face?” He nodded, his eyes finding yours, big as saucers. “Well that’s okay then. Was the ice cream nice at least, considering I’ll never get to eat it now?” He nodded, his toothy grin illuminating his little face. “It was the bestest ice cream I’ve ever had in my life.” You smiled back at him, ruffling his hair as you turned away.  

“Well of course it was, it was my ice cream!” He giggled as he followed you back to your room, taking a seat beside you as you sat at your vanity. “So you’re going out tonight?” He looked at you as you applied mascara, mimicking your funny faces. “Yes which means I’m going to miss movie night. Sorry kiddo!” You had planned to sit and watch the Harry Potter movies with Stevie all night but Dave had texted that morning. He finally had a night off babysitting and you two were practically itching to be together again. You flashed back to that night in the kitchen, a small smile on your face before Stevie piped up again. “I don’t mind we’ve seen all the movies a million zillion times anyway! You’re going out with Dave. I like him, he’s funny and he makes you happy.” He smiled, his tongue poking out between his gums. Kids are more mature than we think. “He does make you happy. You know what makes me happy?” He pondered over the question, his brow furrowed. “Well you really like pizza.” He stated a matter of fact as you laughed. “Well apart from that?” He concentrated again, his tongue poking out as he sighed. “I don’t know, what makes you happy?” You poked him in the side as he let out a squeal. “A CLEAN LITTLE BROTHER. Go clean your face and I’ll make you some pizza?” He dropped from the bench he was perched on. “OKAY!” He ran from the room, leaving you once again in nervous silence.  

You finished up your makeup, letting your hair out the pony you’d slept in. You sighed as you picked up your brush, running it through the bird’s nest that had taken refuge on the top of your head. Not ideal. You winced as you hit a snag, your head jarring. Your phone buzzed against the wood of your desk and you reached for it, smacking your elbow on the sharp corner. “MOTHER FU-” You stopped yourself, your elbow throbbing as Stevie came hammering down the hallway. “YOU WERE GONNA SAY A NAUGHTY WORD.” His jaw hung slack as you picked up your phone, swiping the call accepted. “Stevie, be quiet. I’m on the phone!” He stood in the doorway, his face now clean of the chocolate he was covered in. “Hello?” You spoke, unsure of who was actually calling you. The brush you were using still hung, trapped in a knot in your hair as you balanced the phone between your ear and your shoulder, rubbing your elbow gently. “Hello Gorgeous.” Your body shivered as Dave spoke down his receiver, the sound echoing through you as you sat upright. “Hi Dave, what’s up?” Stevie mocked kissing in the doorway until you reached over, swinging the door shut. He yelped as you heard him run away.  

“It’s about our date. I think I have to cancel. I’m so sorry Kay.” You slouched, your heart in your stomach. “It’s okay, I think Stevie’s pretty cut up about me missing movie night anyway. We can just rearrange? Or is it that you maybe don’t want to go out anymore?” You trailed off, regretting the words that just left your mouth. “Oh my god Kay! That’s not it at all, my mom’s conference got rearranged and now she’s heading out. I have to look after Stella.” He responded, his voice exasperated. “Is that it?” You let out a sigh of relief, pulling at the hairbrush you’d almost forgotten about. “Yeah, I mean I had this whole dinner and everything planned out and I’ve been looking forward to it all day. That and a multitude of other things.” You could hear the smirk in his voice as a chill ran through you once more. “Oh is that so?” You toyed, your voice hushed. “You have no idea, it’s been driving me crazy. I can’t look at an ice-pop the same way anymore.” He laughed, as you giggled. “Well then who am I to take that away? We don’t need a fancy date, we’re not fancy people. Let’s go get a pizza and go to the fair at Elmer’s? You can bring Stella and I’ll bring Stevie?” You probed, finally untangling your hair, a moan escaping your lips. You gasped as Dave sighed. “I wanted to spend some time alone with you, so I can hear you make that noise without the threat of kiddo’s interrupting us again.” His voice was darker, more like honey with a bite. You bit your lip, as your legs crossed. “You’ll get me all to yourself later. But for now, I wanna see you and I’m starved. Meet at Joe’s in like an hour?” You could almost imagine the smile on his face. “I’ll be there, I brought my appetite. Let’s hope they’re serving as much as I can handle.”  

You clicked off the call, your face flushed red as Stevie came barging through your door. “Who was it? Was it Dave? Why do you look like a tomato?” He laughed, pointing to your cheeks. “It was Dave and I look like this because I have decided to become a lobster. I do not care for humans anymore!” You formed your hands into pincers as you reached for him, tickling his sides once more. “I don’t like lobsters.” He pouted. “They don’t like you much either. But you like pizza right?” he nodded vigorously. “Well then let’s go get some!” He cheered as he ran from your room, leaving you to pick up the clothes on your floor. “COME ON SLOWPOKE!” He screamed from the hallway as you shoved your jacket on, the edges of it almost obliterating your shorts. “I’m coming SONIC!” You laughed as you jogged through the house, finding him on the floor, odd shoes on both feet as he fiddled with his laces. “Those don’t even match Stevie.” You grabbed the matching one from the basket, pulling them on his feet as you quickly tied his laces. He sprung up before you even had chance to finish lacing one. “Petrificus Totalus!” You pointed to him, his body instantly freezing in place. He glared at you as you finished tying his laces. You shook him to tell him he could move again. “You can’t just curse me like that!” He laughed as he stole your car keys from your bag, running out the door. “You can’t steal people’s stuff like that! Thief!” You shoved on your beaten-up Vans as you locked the door behind you, the sun hot on your back. You crossed to the car as you hammered on the window for Stevie to unlock the doors.  

Almost an age passed before you heard the click, the door swinging open to reveal Stevie’s sheepish grin. “Sorry Kay, I shouldn’t have stolen your keys! Can we not play the game tonight? I don’t want Stella and Dave to think we are weird.” You winked at him as you climbed in the seat, buckling yourself in. “They wouldn’t understand anyway. Muggles.” Stevie laughed as he sat back in his seat. The drive to Joe’s was quicker if you passed Aubrey’s, but your stomach turned every time you drove past hers. You turned to the left, taking the scenic route, you had time to kill anyway. Stevie bounced in his seat to the music blaring through your speakers, his little lungs screaming the lyrics. You smiled as you tapped along, your stomach in knots at the thought of seeing Dave again. Everything seemed to pass in a blur as you pulled up to Joe’s, Stevie streaking from the car even before you had chance to unclip your seat belt. You threw your door open, grabbing your bag as you chased after him, coming face to face with Aubrey.  

You swallowed thickly, your face draining of color as you avoided her eyes. “Hi Katie, I see Stevie’s not changed much? Still obsessed with pizza I see?” You locked eyes with her, breathing a soft breath of composure as you plastered a fake smile on your face. “Of course he is? He’s six.” You let out a shaky laugh as she smiled. “Yeah, I saw you with Dave the other day, how’s the dating going? He cancelled on you yet?” You rolled your eyes, knowing what was coming. Some bullshit story of how Dave broke her heart, one you knew wasn’t true. “Save it Aubrey, I know what you did to him. I don’t believe a word out your mouth. You wanna know why he cancelled? Cause he didn’t want to see you. He knew you were cheating on him. He didn’t want to give you the satisfaction of having your cake and eating it too.” You spat, your arms crossing over your chest indignantly. Aubrey huffed, her lips pouting as she shifted uncomfortably. “Everyone know’s what you did to him. He’s so nice and you fucked it up. That’s on you and I’m not you; I will treat him right.” She looked over you, her brow quirked. “Yeah, well just remember. I treat him right first. First.” She whispered in your ear as she pushed past you, her shoulder hitting yours. “Oh and Aubrey?” She turned around, her head tilted up as she looked down on you. “That fall from your high horse might fuck your face up. Buy a helmet and grow the fuck up. And for reference it’s KAY, NOT KATIE.” You walked away from her, heading inside to find your little brother.  

He sat in a booth, surrounded by menus, his hands crafting a makeshift mini fort. “Where did you go?” He asked innocently as you slid in the polyurethane booth beside him. “I thought I smelled something bad so I was checking my shoe.” You smiled as you set your bag down, ordering drinks for the both of you. You scrolled down your phone as Stevie hummed under his breath, until a dark mop of hair caught your eye. You heard Stella before you saw her, her laugh tinkling through the dull roar of the pizzeria. “Hi Katie Kat!” She grinned as she climbed on the seat, taking one of Stevie’s menus. He grumbled, but let her as she placed it in front of her, her legs hitting against the bottom of the booth. “Dave says we’re going to the fair!” You sighed, your head in your hands. Stevie fist bumped the air, latching onto you. “Can we go with them please? Pretty please? I swear I won’t eat any more of your ice creams.” He batted his eyelashes, his eyes pleading with you. “We’re all going dummy. No puppy eyes!” He smiled as he pulled a menu out. “THANK YOU.” You had barely taken notice of Dave as he sat opposite you, his dark eyes searching over you. “Hi.” He spoke, a smile playing on his lips. You blushed as you met his eyes, your own lowering as you searched the table for another menu.  

“Hi.” You smiled back, your tongue darting over your lips as you drank in the way he looked. Tight black shirt, stretched thin over his biceps and dark denim jeans, frayed at the ends from excessive wear. You sighed, your ribs being poked by tiny fingers. This is going to be a long night. Dinner went by faster than expected, the kids were too hungry to really talk and you felt like you couldn’t talk for fear of moaning with the way Dave was eyefucking you from across the table. He paid for dinner as you walked out the restaurant, a child attached to each arm. “Do we have to drive to Elmer’s?” Stella chirped as Stevie pulled harder, urging you to walk faster. “I don’t know, you’ll have to ask Dave.” You spoke as he strolled alongside you, his hands in his pockets. “Okay so we can walk there as long as I can walk with Kay. Deal?” The kids squealed as they released your arms, running ahead down the sidewalk. “Thought you liked driving Dave?” You probed, your hands finding his as you walked. “I do, but sometimes I like to slow it down and enjoy things as they come.” You didn’t know if it was your oxygen deprived brain or his deliverance, but he seemed to linger on the word come. You shivered, even though the breeze on your skin was warm.  

You walked in silence before bringing up the whole Aubrey situation. He seemed less pained as you told him what you said, his eyes lighting up as you babbled. “You do bitch so well baby.” He leant over as you relaxed into his side, falling perfectly in step with him. His lips coasted your cheek as you heard the wind pick up the distant chimes of the fair. The kids ran off, their little legs almost going supersonic speeds as they raced towards the twinkling lights and thundering music. You caught up with them easily, Dave’s hand gripping yours as wind whipped through your hair. You lined up, nestled in his arms as you paid admission, the kids pulling excitedly at your hands. The lines were long but Dave made time go by faster, his wit and humour making every minute go by in a blink. The kids pleaded to go on the giant funhouse, only made available for kids under ten. You let them, asking the supervisor there to keep an eye on them as you made your way around, looking for something to pass the time as they wore themselves out. You passed a rickety old tunnel ride, the red and pink lights flashing as you grinned at Dave. “Please?” You batted your lashes as you pointed to the sign, his eyes lighting up. “Tunnel of Love? It��s like the lamest ride here, plus it looks half broken down.” You pouted, pulling out the puppy dog eyes. “But what about the ferris wheel?” He pointed behind you as you whipped around. “I hate heights.” You turned back to him, pulling him flush against you. “Plus if we go on the tunnel of love, we can just make out the whole time. No interruptions.” You whispered as his hands gripped your hips.

You crushed your lips to his, his tongue darting over yours as he groaned. “Well then what are we fucking waiting for?” His voice was whiskey and silk as it coasted over you, his hands pulling you to the entrance. You paid your entry, sitting in the crappy plastic seats as you made your way into the darkness. You didn’t waste a minute, coming together as soon as you disappeared from view. His hands found your waist, his fingers balling the material up as he gripped you to him, your legs entangling. Your breathing made you dizzy, his breath intoxicating as his lips left yours, dragging hot wet kisses down your jaw and over your neck. You squirmed, desperate for more your head rolling as his lips found your collarbone. “I’ve been thinking about this all fucking day.” He breathed, his teeth grazing your skin. “I’ve been thinking about this all fucking week in fact.” You sighed as his fingers played with the zip of your jacket, his hands reaching up to pull it from your shoulders. You shivered slightly as it dropped to your waist, his hands palming over you as his lips found yours once more. You inched closer to him as the ride ground to a halt, your attention otherwise occupied as his hands roamed your body.  

He was everywhere, lighting everything on fire, an unholy flame raging through your veins as you shook. His lips left yours as you both gasped for air, hands on legs and shoulders as you came together. His hands coasted over your hips as he pulled you onto his hips, your legs straddling his as you ground against him, his cock hard against the material of his jeans. You smiled, as you reached between your bodies, your hand running over his growing bulge as he groaned. The sounds he made were lost in the cacophony of love songs playing on the overhead system. You drowned them out as you buried your head in his neck, placing soft kisses against his mole speckled skin. He rolled his neck as his hands coasted over your ass, kneading and gripping you tighter to him. You don’t know how long you stayed buried in his neck but you came up gasping for air as he dragged your shirt up your torso. The lighting was so dim you could barely see an inch in front of you but you could swear you could feel his eyes on you. He moved quickly, pulling your shirt from you completely, his mouth replacing the cotton as he licked over your breast, rough fingertips pulling the lace from you. You stopped him, reaching behind you to unclasp it before letting it fall to the floor. “Fuck.” He whispered, his lips connecting with your skin. You lit up like a circuit board, his lips the ignition for the spark than ran through you. His lips dragged across the valley of your chest, his tongue rolling over your nipple before he took it between his teeth, his lips latching as you surged towards him.  

Moans fell from your lips as you rocked atop him, his cock rubbing the material of your cutoffs in such a way; that if you carried on, there would be no coming back. He paused as his hands coasted over your spine, nails leaving ragged red marks as he moved, his mouth now giving attention elsewhere. Your breathing was ragged as your fingers danced over the fabric of his shirt, fingertips intertwining with dark hair on the bottom of his stomach. His breathing caught as you pulled the material up, his warmth leaving yours as he pulled it over his head. You bit your lip as you palmed over his chest, barely making out the constellation of freckles in the dim lights. “Either get rid of the shorts or I will do it for you.” He spoke, his voice cracking. You nodded as you rolled back to your seat, your shorts already half way down your legs as his hands raked over you. He started innocently enough, half finished patterns on your thighs, his fingers snaking over the sensitive skin on the inner half. You sighed, rolling against the plastic wishing for more than just his hands. Not that you were complaining, of course.  

His hands were magic as they moved over your skin, electric and fire and holy Hell ran through your veins at the lightest of touch. His fingers danced over the lace of your panties as your lip caught between your teeth. You groaned as he pulled away only for his fingers to hook in the band of your panties, roughly pulling them down your legs. His hands were on your hips as he pulled you to him again, his jeans discarded somewhere in the darkness. You didn’t care as you straddled him again, his cock teasing over your clit. “You’ve clearly been thinking about this all day too.” He breathed, his words vibrating over your skin. “You have no idea Dave, you were practically eye-fucking me at dinner.” Your words were punctuated by draws of breath as he slipped over you, his fingers dipping between your folds. “Well it’s a shame we had company, I wanted nothing more than to be eating you rather than the pizza.” You shook as you straddled him, your clit rubbing against the head of his cock. You stifled a moan, the music pausing as he moved over you. He moved painfully slow, his cock drawing circles over your clit as you bit your lip.  

“Dave-” You whispered his name as his hips snapped to yours, his cock slipping over you quicker. You sucked in a sharp breath as he raised his hand to your face. He let his fingers trace over your cheek and your jaw before his fingers grazed your lips. You understood immediately, wrapping your lips around his fingers, your tongue rolling over them. He groaned in the darkness, his cock twitching against your core. “You really have a mouth on you, don’t you, baby?” He whispered as you rolled against him, your body raging in a fire that you were pretty sure was going to consume you. “Dave-” You whined as his hands dipped between your legs, the tips of his fingers brushing against you. It was like kicking up the dust, the flames only licking higher at the lightest touch. He palmed over his cock, using his fingers to rub slight circles against you, his cock teasing at your entrance. “Dave-” You spoke more forcefully as his chuckle filled the space between you. “Sorry baby” He spoke against your skin as he pushed into you, your body sighing in relief. “You’re forgiven” You stuttered out, your breathing shallow as he began to thrust into you. His hands gripped your hips, his fingers leaving half moon ridges from bitten down fingernails. He rolled you a top him, rocking as he thrusted, the combination only fuelling the fire that raged on within you.  

Your arms found his chest, palming over him as the coil within you tightened, your head spinning. His hands wandered over your body, his fingers finding your nipples once more as he rolled them between his forefinger and thumb, a groan rippling through him. He thrust harder, his cock slamming against you as you bit back a scream. “I want to hear you baby, don’t hold back.” He whispered as his hands moved down your body, rough fingertips barely touching your clit. You clenched around him at the contact, your head rolling back as he gripped you to him. “I may be an ass man, but when you serve up your tits like this I can’t help but take advantage.” You barely choked out a reply, a mixture of his lips and hands had you spilling out moans. Curses left your lips as his fingers quickened; his mouth finding your chest once more, his lips puckering the skin and marring it purple and blue. Your legs shook as a moan ricocheted through you. “Cum for me baby. I want to hear and feel you cum.” He spoke again as your head fell against the top of his, his cock slamming into you at angles that had you seeing stars. “Dave-” You mumbled, your body rising as the coil tightened. Your breathing stopped as you hurtled over the edge, a scream piercing the stagnant air around you. It echoed as your muscles seized, your heart slamming in your chest.  

He moaned, your name falling from his lips in an almost prayer as his head fell forwards. His fingers never stopped their relentless movements, his patterns unfinished as he pushed you towards that edge again. “Again baby.” He whispered, barely audible over the drone of the music. You bit your lip as you rocked against him, your ass moving at double the speed he could manage. “Join me.” You whispered back, using your nose to nudge his head to the side. You kissed along his neck, sucking the skin between your teeth as his hips juddered against yours, urging you towards his release. “Dave-” You whispered against him as he slammed into you, his orgasm crashing over him as his fingers danced you towards your own. You screamed against his neck, the noise only slightly muffled by skin. He held you there, your bodies slick with sweat as you reached for your shirt. You peeled yourself from him as the lights came on, the carriage inching forward at long last.  

“How long were we in here for?” You asked Dave as you dressed, frantically pulling on items of clothing. “I have no idea but I don’t particularly care.” He laughed as he zipped himself up. “Dave, I can’t find my panties. Do you remember where I was when I took them off?” His eyes widened as he took his phone from his pocket, his torch illuminating the space around you. “I think I threw them.” he laughed, his face crumpled in a half laugh. “You asshole!” You play slapped his arm as you pulled your shorts on, the denim rough against your sensitive skin. “I didn’t mean to! They were in the way and I was preoccupied!” You sighed as you sat back down, the denim rubbing against you. “You owe me new ones.” You grumbled, settling in the crook of his arm. “Why you know when we’re together you’re better off without.” You smiled as the ride came to an end, the world outside darker than you thought it would be. You stepped out the carriage, stretching out your aching muscles as Dave did the same. A young girl probably no older than 15 came running over to you, her face in a blind panic.

“We are so sorry that the ride broke down! We can offer you a full refund for your trip and maybe some snacks? It usually doesn’t break down for that long.” You reached out for her, your hand gently touching her arm. “It’s okay! I didn’t mind, we barely even noticed. In fact I would definitely come again.” You emphasized the word come as your eyes glanced over to Dave, his hands covering the grin on his face. “Oh thank you! I hope you had a wonderful time!” She smiled as she returned to her station. “Wonderful is the light way of saying it.” You mumbled as Dave walked over to you. “We should get the kids and go home, it’s getting late.” He spoke as you walked hand in hand to pick them up. They came out screeching, their eyes red rimmed and yawns stretching their mouths wide. “Where were you guys?” Stella croaked, her little hands covering her mouth as she yawned again. She reached out for your hand as you walked through the grass. “Me and Dave went on a grown up ride. It broke down and we couldn’t get out!” You laughed, shooting Dave a look as he took Stevie’s hand. “Was it scary?!” Stevie piped up, his eyes wide as you walked on, heading out the fair. “Katie was screaming it was that scary.” Dave quipped, blush rippling through your cheeks.  

“Scaredy cat! Can we try and win a bear before we go home?!” Stella squealed as she pointed to the hook a duck sign. “Sure thing kiddo!” You laughed as you and Dave paid the attendant, each of the kids successfully winning themselves a bear. Dave yelled as Stella won 2 in a row and you laughed as Stevie went on to win 2 as well. “We can all have a bear!” Stevie smiled as he handed Dave the stuffed animal. “Aw, thank you Stevie! I’ll treasure it forever!” He smiled, his whiskey colored eyes lighting up at the small gesture. “Well now we have our bears how about we all go home?” Stella nodded, her lids drooping as you walked back to the car. You limped as the material of your shorts rubbed against you, the friction making it hard to close your legs. “Kay, why are you walking like a penguin?” Stevie asked as he watched you, his hand still gripping Dave’s. “Is it because of the ride?” He quirked his brow innocently as you blushed, a deep shade of crimson. “It most certainly is. But don’t worry I’m sure it’ll pass.” You winked at Dave as a smirk played on your lips. You carried on walking until your legs ached and you were pretty sure denim was made of sandpaper. You spotted the car, the kids using the last of their energy to run towards them. Dave and you hung back, your fingers latching together as you spoke. “So maybe next time bring a spare pair?” He quipped, his eyes smiling as he spoke. “Oh so there’s going to be a next time?!” You laughed, using your hand to slap across his chest playfully. “Kids or no kids, I’m game if you are.” You laughed. “Oh it’s on Hodgman.”

[blessuswithblogs]

Convoluted Time and Ordered Space: Why We Still Yearn For Lordran's Connected World

It's been a good 5 and a half years since the initial release of Dark Souls. For the number of games in the series that have been released since then, it's actually a surprisingly short amount of time. This makes the great reverence that many fans have for the first game slightly puzzling. Not enough time has really passed for nostalgia to cloud the critical eye, but then again, if there is one thing gamers are good at, it's getting nostalgic about things. Make no mistake, while Dark Souls 1 was beloved from the very outset, there were many outspoken voices criticizing some of the game's more questionable design decisions, and many people felt that the game’s latter half, after obtaining the lordvessel, was outright bad. To be perfectly honest with you, I never found the latter half of Souls 1 to be that appalling. It's the weaker half of the game, certainly, and Lost Izalith and the Crystal Caves make for a truly vile one two punch of drudgery, but it was still very strong. These days, people tend not to mention these areas when waxing poetic about the deific status of the first Dark Souls. There are as many takes on why it was so magical as there are people with thoughts about it, but I have discovered a common thread: the game's interconnected world.

Since this seems to be such an important part of the experience, it bears going over even if most people are familiar with the gist of it. The first Dark Souls is layed out in such a way that the entire game world is more or less completely contiguous with itself (with a scant few exceptions). A few points of no return at the end of certain paths aside, you can actually walk the length and breadth (and height, quite importantly) of Lordran in its entirety in a geographically sensical and unbroken session. What's more, there's a wide variety of hidden paths, shortcuts, and clever elevators that the player can use to get around the place quickly. It is, essentially, the long unfulfilled promise of a three dimensional Metroidvania game. Metroid Prime got there, but really only for the Metroid part, and Dark Souls delivers on the weapon findy level uppy boss fighty npc talky that made people fall in love with Symphony of the Night. It is a superlative use of digital space that makes Lordran an area that people can make a detailed mental map of years after last playing the game. It makes Lordran feel real and immediate in a way that many game worlds don't because of their disconnected nature, later games in the series not the least of these. The architecture and layout of Lordran doesn't always make sense in terms of "this is a space that people lived in and used", but it makes a good attempt to not be utterly ridiculous. Most of the more esoteric routes you take to get places are justified by, say, the main road falling into a state of disrepair or the bridge being guarded by a fire breathing dragon. It does, however,  almost always make physical point A to point B sense, the few exceptions to this rule usually being intentional, like the Painted World or Past Oolacile.

People went nuts for this design, myself among them. It remains a feature of the game I adore and cherish, and will remain a definite advantage of Souls 1 in comparison to later titles. Compelling arguments have been made that this interconnectedness was sort of slapdashedly put together and actually makes the game worse in some ways, especially if you go through areas in ways the developers maybe didn't expect. They're fair points, but I believe that the pros outweigh the cons, and I will outline why in 3 points. First of all, it gives the game some significant replay value. Secondly, as I touched on briefly above, it helps to create a coherent and compelling world. Lastly, it accentuates and compliments the achievements and mastery the player has gained over the game. Naturally, I'll go over the hows and whys in more detail one at a time. I wouldn't expect you to take my word for it, after all.

Let's begin with something quite important to me, unemployed and impoverished as I am: replay value. I highly value games that are fun to pick back up and play after you've beaten them. Dark Souls, albeit to a lesser extent than its direct predecessor Demon's Souls, is a game that very much has replays in mind. The New Game plus feature allows for as many cycles of play as you want with the game's numerical difficulty scaling with each pass. However, I actually don't bother too much with NG+ in Dark Souls. Doing the same thing over again with the same character, just with more Numbers, isn't that appealing. Fortunately, simply starting anew with a different build is also something the game encourages thanks to the wide variety of ways it allows you to approach its first half and the Master Key gift, which unlocks a couple of key doors that allow access to later areas much earlier. A new character can make use of this gift along with the foreknowledge of previous playthroughs to beeline for certain weapons, armor, and spells to jumpstart unique builds for PvP or just for a different way to play the game. The critical path can be subverted, circumnavigated, and in some cases skipped outright for different challenges and contexts. Did you know you can actually just skip the dang Taurus Demon? And the Capra Demon? It's pretty neat. It doesn't always make the game better to play, but it keeps things interesting on replays and allows for some memorable builds and pvp shenanagins.

I briefly mentioned Demon's Souls earlier, and I want to be clear: that game also had fantastic replay value with a very different idea of world design. I have most often heard DeS's world described as the spokes on a wheel, where you start from the central hub of the nexus and branch off into five distinct areas that are totally separate from one another. It's similar in practice to how Megaman games are layed out, honestly. However, in Demon's Souls, the the areas are segmented and you can warp back to the Nexus after a boss fight signals the end of a "stage". The common way to refer to these is as, say, 3-1, 2-3, 5-2, etcetera. The way you can mix and match your progression makes the same things true of Dark Souls replayability also true of Demon's Souls, though I would argue that DeS is a less full featured game to take full of advantage of it. Also those fucking crystal geckos only spawn a limited number of times. What even the hell. The point of this aside is to establish that I think that Spoking Paths are also good! The interconnected world is not the one true way! However, I believe that part of the reason that many people so drastically prefer Dark Soul's approach is that it's so much more uncommon and fresh, even if it is somewhat unrefined. People are fiercely attached to the Metroidvania style, now more than ever thanks to Konami's questionable business practices and the apparent death of Castlevania as a property. One of dark souls 3's bigger issues, to me, is that it's quite linear without really justifying it, being neither an interconnected world or a spoking one. It's well designed for the most part but it does hamper replays and specialized low level builds quite a bit. HAD TO DUNK ON 3 A LITTLE SORRY SORRY WHY AM I LIKE THIS

Moving on. Let's talk more about how interconnectedness makes the world more coherent and compelling. The first part is kind of easy. For an interconnected world to work, it must be at least a little coherent to begin with. If your shortcuts, branching paths, and doublebacks don't make any geographical sense, then your world falls apart before it begins. This is why many games prefer more segmented approaches to world design - it gives you more freedom to explore a variety of locations without compromising on the spatial integrity of your world. It's not a contradiction for Sonic to explore both Green Hill Zone and the Magma Heck Zone and the Weird Giant Casino Zone because they're in different places entirely and he just ran to each one off screen. He's fast. That's Sonic's thing.  The Chosen Undead can move at a pretty good clip while naked, but is no Sonic the Hedgehog, and thus is more locationally constrained. Lordran is self-contained. There are a few areas outside of it reached by Hard Transitions, like a magic painting or a giant bird taxi service, but everything else is just, there. Dark Souls uses vertical space very heavily to pack as much variety of environment as it can into a fairly compact region. You've got decadent Anor Londo up on top of it all, with Sens's Fortress guarding the entrance, and then down below are the various levels of the Undead Burg and Darkroot garden, essentially residential areas. You can see these places from one another, which is extremely important to this whole enterprise. This is both a Cool Thing and pertinent to gameplay: you are given rather sparse direction in Dark Souls, and more than once I was spurred on by seeing something neat looking in the distance to continue on and see if I could reach it. And I almost always could! It moves the game along and it's an intrinsically rewarding exercise. It's like, when Todd Howard says you can go fuck the mountain, that's all well and good, but why do I want to fuck the mountain? It's just a dang mountain and I probably have to do my best billygoat impression to get anywhere with it. In Dark Souls, you can see that Lower Undead Burg from Firelink and you can go there, and there are Things To Do There, and more of the world to uncover.

Now it's not perfect. The interconnected world really only applies to the first half of the game or so. Once you reach Anor Londo and find the lord vessel, the game actually transitions to more of a Spoke layout, with distinct paths with end points that do not intersect (though you can see Lost Izalith and Ash Lake from Tomb of the Giants, which is real cool). This is also where people, on release, started really harshing on the game, and not without justification. The areas seemed unfinished and the jarring transition to a strictly spoke based world for the final stretch was offputting. This is not a failure of spoking world design, it's bad because the game was just kind of half-finished and messy on the back half, but I think that it may have poisoned the well on future Wheelworlds in the series. Some of the shortcuts and hidden paths also added to lore and worldbuilding. Ash lake, for instance, offered insight into just how the planet Lordran is situated on is constructed - a way very different from our own, and one that still kind of gives me the Fear of Deep Water heeby jeebies. I will defend dark souls 2 to the death, but magma castle in the sky is a hill I will leave for hbomberguy to die on. There is merit to the reading of Drangleic as a place where space as well as time is convoluted, but that one was just lazy, and if souls 2 wanted to have a sort of geographic reveal like Ash Lake, it really wouldn't have worked. It wouldn't have been a fundamental truth about the composition of the world, it just would have been another nonsensical transition. I think this is why people can get so down on 2's world even though it really is quite good. The seeming randomness of the places in Drangleic takes away from the concrete physicality that made Lordran a character in its own story. Dark Souls 3 is another thing entirely that I think I'll talk about at more length in its own article, that game has a very deliberate world architecture unlike both of its predecessors.

Finally, we come to my most abstract point. I assert that the interconnected world accentuates and compliments the player's mastery and achievements throughout the game. What does this mean, exactly? Essentially, the way the world is layed out naturally reinforces and rewards getting better at the game. My point is encapsulated by that moment that every new player has: you fight your way tooth and nail to the chapel in the Undead Parish. Home base seems miles away. You're not sure you could get back if you needed to. But, suddenly! You find an elevator shortcut right back to Firelink Shrine, illuminating the purpose of some of the odder architecture there and cementing your mental map of the world. It also feels fantastic and relieving and inspiring. You have made tangible progress. That elevator remains operational. You can come and go as you please. Your achievement in making it this far at all is celebrated and rewarded by a quick way back to safety, which in turns makes further explorations and adventures possible. It's a feeling that's distinctly diluted by unconditional warping bonfires. I don't think those are bad, necessarily, but it's undeniable that finding them feels less significant. In Dark Souls 1, there's a risk/reward aspect even to bonfires: if I rest here, it makes getting back to where I came from that much more difficult. Certainly, one could argue that all of this just results in lots of unnecessary walking and tedium, but I found Lordran to be a compelling enough place to be in that I didn't mind it so much. Your mileage may vary.

Continuing with my theme of abstractions and game "feel", the interconnected, crisscrossing, backtracking world of Lordran allows players to feel strong and see the fruits of their labors in ways that the more linear and streamlined games in the series miss out on. When you first start out, the enemies in the Burg and the Parish are threatening. You engage them carefully and deliberately, and never too many at once. The Undead in proper armor are credible enemies that cannot be taken lightly. Then you fastforward to a while later when you're on your way to Darkroot Garden or Sen's Fortress by way of Andre's bonfire and you're just bowling through these guys like they're nothing. You have grown stronger and more skilled, reflected both in how you handle enemies that were once threatening and how your weapon now kills them in one hit. By revisiting these areas to access new ones, you reaffirm in a different way that progress is being made. Even the once terrifying baldur knights in the chapel proper don't pose much of a threat anymore. The demons in the ruins used to be minibosses, but now they're just regular enemies. It's a sense of progression in an often harshly difficult game that uplifts and gives you the energy to keep going. Unless you go out of your way to search for items that you missed, this sensation is quite lacking in Souls 2 and 3, since you can just warp past everything from the getgo. Earning the ability to warp at all in Souls 1 is a big-ass deal, the reward for one of the hardest, most climactic fights in the game, and it's a real Hell Yeah moment. It's another way that your mastery has been affirmed, and it feels good to have worked for it. I think that the later games would have benefited from holding off on giving you warps immediately, but only if their worlds had been designed from the ground up with that in mind, so, maybe not actually. And I can certainly understand why somebody would not like all this beating of feet to begin with and be more than happy to just warp everywhere. Like I said, it's a feel thing, but it's an important part of the game to me. To others as well, if I'm not mistaken.

I've said many times before that I don't think that Dark Souls 1 deserves the effusive reverence afforded to it in contrast with its successors. I love it, it was a singular game, but it wasn't the second coming. With that said, I wanted to take the time to really think about why people loved the game so much, where I agreed and disagreed, and I came to the conclusion that this interconnected world of Lordran was a key piece of the puzzle. Fans fiercely love this aspect of the game, and I am with them in this. A longing to return to this format of world exploration is something that I deeply understand, even if I also acknowledge the merit of other approaches. It does boil down to preference, but I try to keep my preferences grounded in a certain degree of rigor and objectivity. If I didn't I would probably start demanding that every game have a main theme composed and performed by Crush 40 and a talking dog companion. That would be bad. At any rate, it's not surprising that fans cling to this aspect of the game so doggedly even when all indications point to it being a single, one-off thing. Something so good and affecting must be hard to design over and over again, after all.