#they are literally called mind raph and savage raph

[solacebean]

I’m just saying there IS a difference and it’s kinda important

[lilysniche]

Alright nerds I'm back with more ROTTMNT content and this time we're talking about turtles being left alone

Spoilers ahead for seasons 1 & 2 and the movie

On yet another Monday evening I was thinking about the season 1 episode 'Man vs. Sewer' (which they really should have been called Turtle vs. Sewer c'mon now) and Raph's reaction to being left alone.

So naturally my mind wandered down the path of how the other three turtles would react to being left all alone. So I am here to present my headcanony thoughts similar to my other post about the turtles rankings of fav brother which I'll link here.

This post is going to be very long. I apologize now.

Now in the episode 'Man vs. Sewer' (btw I understand this is supposed to be a play on how every story is one of four or something story types, e.g. Man vs. Man, Man vs. Nature etc.) I'm rambling again!

In 'Man vs. Sewer' the other turtles make it seem like Raph is the only one who has a reaction to being left alone, and while I'm sure Raph is the only one with such a... dramatic reaction we'll say. I feel that the other three would likely still have a reaction to being left alone given the fact that all four of these turtles have been raised in an EXTREMTLY close knit family. I mean prior to meeting April their only friends were each other and were likely the only other living beings they saw. After all in the episode 'Hot Soup: The Game' it's said that Raph was 13 when he got to go on his first solo topside mission. Now while it is possible the boys went topside prior to this as a group it wouldn't surprise me if this was the first time any of them were allowed to leave the sewers given their likely overall lack of um... stealth at such a young age since they barely have stealth as teenagers lol.

I'm getting off track though! My point is that because this family is practically always together I find it hard to believe that if any of them were left alone they'd be perfectly fine and so I will now present my headcanons/ hypothesis' about each turtles reaction to being alone.

Now Raph has already been cannonically shown in his reaction to being alone. He goes savage caveman brain, thinks everything is a threat and believes he'll die alone.

Next up we'll look at:

Leo

Now I know you could point to the movie for examples of Leo being alone but that is such an extreme situation in comparison to Raph getting lost in a sewer for like an hour or so that I don't feel the movie is a great comparison for "being left alone" so for this post when I'm talking about "being alone" I don't mean the others are dead, or kidnapped or anything really angsty. Think more lost in the sewers, or some of the family went to visit Todd for the weekend and one stayed at the lair alone and realized that was a mistake because separation anxiety and codependency lmao.

Now Leo is arguably also left alone in the episode 'Portal Jacked' (portal jacked is such a good episode for Leo character analysis I'm telling you) Now I know what you're thinking "Lily he literally is with Senor Hueso practically the entire episode" and you're right. Leo is technically only alone for maybe ten seconds between him exiting his portal outside Run of the Mill Pizza and entering the restaurant to find Senor Hueso but he's left without any of his family with him almost the entire episode and it leads to a lot of discussion about them and him being without them so I feel it will help support my argument.

Anyway!

In 'Portal Jacked' Leo whilst still being himself starts to show some of his insecurity in the episode. He admits to "being nothing" without his brothers and continuously brings up how he's better with his brothers. I feel based on these comments and this episode as a whole that if Leo were left alone for likely a longer period of time than Raph (let's say a day or two at the minimum for an effect to really set in) he'd likely let his insecurities get the best of him. As without his brothers as an audience to entertain, taunt, and distract himself from his own insecurities he's left with only himself to be his hype man and back up.

If you don't agree that Leo has insecurities I'll point you in the direction of the episode 'Minotaur Maze' and Leo's reoccurring need to prove himself to others and have them see him as important.

This insecurity is also what plays into Leo's behavior as leader in the film as he clearly doesn't view himself as worthy/ready for the title of "leader" at the start of the film.

Using these points I feel that without his brothers to back him up and perhaps cover for areas Leo lacks in he'd quickly spiral and become very unsure of himself and his actions. As Leo (prior to the movie especially) comes across as someone who does not want to take credit for something until it has already happened and succeeded. (e.g the episode 'One Man's Junk' where Leo literally waits to pick a side on the mystic meatal shop idea until after it fails and sides with Raph) Leo needs to be able to shift blame and "hide in the crowd" if you will in order to not feel like he's failing during a mission (which most the time he's actually succeeding just maybe not how he envisions himself doing so). So if he were to be left all alone with only himself to blame if a mistake was made I feel he'd become very unsure of himself and perhaps rather nervous his portals perhaps become more unreliable than normal (if we are setting this post season 2 finale then it would probably more like him earlier in the show where his portals don't always work. If we're pre-season 2 finale where his portals barely work on a good day then he'd likely cease making useful portals all together lol) and is continuously cracking jokes to whoever is around to listen (even if it's just himself) because to quote Leo: "That's how I cope!"

Final analysis of Leo alone: Very insecure, Nervous, desperately trying to find someone to hang around so he can throw his one liners to try to cope, and anxious to have his brothers back to back up him and his crazy ideas.

Whew! That was a very long research paper I just gave you and that's only the first one!

Again I am so sorry for the length of this post lmao I enjoy doing character analysis too much I'm so sorry.

Moving on to my favorite turtle we have:

Donnie

While it seems that Donnie enjoys being alone I find that because of this close knit family upbringing he'd still be affected by being alone. After all there's a difference between:

alone and lonely and

choosing to be alone and being left alone.

Donnie has plenty of hobbies that prompt him to be alone e.g. he has a video game addiction; or want to be alone e.g. He's the family genius/inventor whose in his lab for extended periods of time to try an accomplish something and anyone disturbing him is an unwelcomed distraction.

An example of this is the episode 'Mind Meld' when Donnie-fied Leo, Raph and Mikey try to get rid of Donnie when he asks them to come eat pizza with him. To quote Donnie "Hey wait! You're trying to get rid of me! That's what I do but... but to you!"

'Mind Meld' is a great episode for Donnie character analysis since there are basically 4 of him in this episode and we get to see how Donnie's character isn't just the smart inventor guy but also a normal teenager who likes to do normal teen things

While Donnie likes being alone and working in his lab, when he wants to see people he wants to see them and not be alone. This is shown in an earlier scene in 'Mind Meld' when Donnie excitedly asks if his brothers are ready for their game of skateboard ball. His Donnie-fied brothers give a very Donnie response and shrug him off saying they have better things to do and Donnie is left really disappointed. Leo, Raph and Mikey are acting like Donnie when he's in "genius tech guy mode" rather than "I'm ready to have fun with my brothers mode" like actual Donnie is in this scene.

Honestly the whole episode is a great example of how Donnie is a well rounded character and how he'd be very different if he only had one facet to his personality. With Leo, Raph, and Mikey all Donnie-fied but seemingly only to possess Donnie's intellect you see that Donnie is more than his brain and has other sides to his personality. That was a side tangent sorry! I really love the writing of this show! Back to my actual point!!

When Donnie wants to work on something people are a nuisance but when he wants to have fun then people better be around or Donnie will be sad.

Now that I have prefaced the circumstances, I will dive into my headcanon/hypothesis about how Donnie would react to being alone.

Now Donnie's reaction is entirely hinged on what mode he is currently in. If he is in work mode it would probably go something like this:

Like I have just stated Donnie is in his lab a lot working on various projects, be it improving his battleshells, working on his drill, working on the Turtletank etc. And based on Donnie's character he seems the type to hyper-focus on his work and not realize how much time has passed *cough* me on any passion project *cough* With this being said I feel that Donnie probably wouldn't notice he's been left alone at first lol. He'd probably hyper-focus for an entire day, forget to eat, maybe remember to go to sleep in a bed or just pass out in his lab, wake up and repeat the process until he finished his project or remembered to take a break. This would likely cause a decline in Donnie's overall well being and is why I think Donnie shouldn't be left unsupervised for extended periods of time lmao. So his family would likely have to be gone at least a week for Donnie to notice if I'm being honest. But that is only if Donnie were in work mode!

If Donnie was left alone in the lair and he was in social mode, I feel that he'd likely be pretty bummed that no one was around to bug him. Between Leo razzing him, Mikey always coming around to cuddle/get affection from each of them and just Raph's overall presence and dumb ideas like trying to shove something up his nose. Donnie would likely feel like he's actually alone. Like entirely alone. There's no hum of energy from his brothers, no slight annoyance just silence and emptiness. And he might relish it for a moment but after a few minutes of uninterrupted silence he'd realize that he can't take it and needs the energy to fill the space again. And knowing Donnie (and depending on how long the fam was gone for) he'd try to substitute it with tech. Causing a new start of work mode that was trying to fix the lack of socializing he craves.

Final analysis of Donnie alone: He doesn't immediately notice that he's alone but once he's made aware of the growing silence and actual solitude with no disruption it starts to get to him and makes him anxious for some social stimulation from others specifically from his family because turtle fam is best fam

Alright! We have made it through two turtle boys and only have one left! you know him you love him! He's the sunshine baby iiiiiiiiiiiittttttt'sssssss:

🅼🅸🅺🅴🆈

Now Mikey is a lil bit more difficult for me to figure out how he'd react to being alone and this is mainly because I find it hard to imagine a normal situation that would cause him to be left alone. If we went with my everyone went away for the weekend idea I said at the start I find it highly unlikely they'd let Mikey of all people stay home alone. Simply because he's the baby and they don't like to leave him without supervision/back up (I mean just look at the episode 'Hot Soup: The Game' they literally watch him on security cameras like new parents watching a baby monitor) Like hell he's being intentionally left to his own devices for a whole weekend.

Which makes me think Mikey being alone would have to be accidental like Raph's in 'Man vs. Sewer' be it he got lost in the sewers, or like a proper younger sibling wandered off without paying attention and lost the group in: the Hidden City, Big Mama's building, the Sewers, New York City itself or whatever setting the boys are currently in.

Mikey likely wouldn't be alone for long since you know Raph will be on a rampage to find his baby brother, unless Mikey got hella lost and Donnie couldn't just track him lol.

So for this hypothetical scenario we'll say Mikey wanders off and Raph notices after several minutes and in classic turtles fashion hijinks ensues. Since this alone time will likely be brief and accidental I imagine Mikey's reaction (since he's played as the very emotional one -in a good way- and also for a little bit of comedic purposes) to be similar to a toddler who get's lost in a store.

Everything's fine before he realizes he's lost then he looks around doesn't recognize where he is or see his brothers he starts to freak out a bit and maybe get a bit teary eyed thinking he's been abandoned when really it's his own fault for getting lost. Y'know just normal baby sibling who's constantly supervised things ✌️

It's a lot of meekly wandering around calling out his brother's names hoping they'll magically appear before him and getting scared by anyone who approaches him, because even though he could definitely kill you since Mikey can throw a whole ass cargo ship around, now that he's scared he can't even lift his weapon high enough to seem like a threat.

This line of reasoning is mainly coming from the episode 'The Gumbus' where when frightened Mikey would rather hide and escape even if he has more than enough skill to defend himself from a normal threat lol.

Final analysis of Mikey alone: He's a frightened baby ready for his big brothers to come charging in to take him home and shower him with affection because while Mikey acts like he's big man on campus he is still bebe

And with that I conclude my long monologue about these turtle boys for another night! I will likely return with another thought soon as Rise has taken up every space square inch of my brain lately lol! Anyways as always these are just my opinions you are free to disagree with me this has just been rattling around in my brain for the past week and I had to share! I love all of these characters and I think Rise did a great job at revitalizing them to a new generation. With that I bid you all farewell! Until next post!

~ Lily's Niche

[averagehomosapien]

Post-Krang Raph Headcannon/AU

Ok, so rolling with the headcannon that Raph either has DID or OSDD, let’s say that the events from the movie created 2 new alters

The original alters were Savage, Mind Raph, Red Angel, and Raph himself—so before the movie there were 4 alters in this system

One of the new alters is Krang(Kraang??)

Literally, it’s the Krang/Kraang in Raph’s body

I think they were implanted when Raph was back on the ship being interrogated and fronted a few weeks after the invasion.

They would have all the abilities the regular Krang had—and that means the ability to make Krang monsters as well, which would be an interesting premise for a fanfic 🤔

Other notes are listed below👇

The other alter would be Kraaph/Kraph

They would be less hostile compared to Krang and not have all Krang abilities, but they would be able to alter Raph’s ninpo to make Krang-like projections for their body.

Additional notes below 👇

Honestly, I got this idea from the many fanfics I’ve read, so this is not original!! I just wanted to draw some ideas for it and make a post about it, so here we are!

not sure if someone else on tumbler did this already, so tell me if they did pls!

For now, I think I’ll call this au These Tendrils Run Deep

Otherwise, have a great day peeps!!

[rapharoni-supreme]

Andrea-Mod’s Raph-focused fics masterpost

Since I’m posting my fics here, I figured I might as well make a masterpost of all my Raph-focused fics that I’ve written (so far). Starting from the earliest:

Knitting Needles Make Good Conversation Starters

How does the so-called 'angry one' of the family become not so angry? Simple. With a few good coping mechanisms, and a lot of help and support from his family. ((Literally the first fic I ever wrote for Rise, so pls excuse any typos or out of date details/OOC-ness)).

Patience and Fangs

There are many things Splinter still has to learn when it comes to being a father to four turtle tots. But one things is for certain: He loves his sons. ALL parts of them, even the parts that may be a bit more... savage.

Happiness is a Warm Puppy

It’s always good to take a break, especially during the rough times. Breaks that involve your favorite little brother and a bunch of fun, cuddly and slightly mischievous puppies? Those are even better. ((Post s2-finale, Mikey helps Raph de-stress after the whole Shredder ordeal))

Test Subject #1-R

“Why were you trying to lift a bus anyway?” Donnie asked, his face a mix of tired and exasperated, “Do you seriously not remember last time?”

“No, I remember,” Raph replied, scowling a little, “I just thought that now that I had a little more Raph power-!”

“While the scientific part of me would like to encourage experimenting and testing, I’m fairly certain your Aura Clone-Jutsu technique wasn’t meant to be used to pick up buses for fun.” ((Post s2-finale, Raph and Donnie experiment w/ Raph’s new aura powers))

Sweet Sixteen

On the morning of Raph's birthday, he and his father share a moment, and Raph is reminded that even if birthdays don't always feel like a big deal, they can still be worth celebrating.

Snapper's Day Out

What was meant to be a relaxing day out (and a simple trip to Teddy Bear Town) for Raph ends up having a few extra twists to it. But, that doesn't necessarily make it a bad day. Far from it, actually.

A Matter of Perspective

It hadn’t exactly changed much, it was still the same old face he always had. Same old eyes and snout and snaggletoothed mouth. He had to wonder what had made these things - what had made all of him, apparently - so ‘criminal-like’ for lack of a better word.

(OR: Raph deals with the aftermath of the whole Heinous Green situations, and the not-so-great feelings that comes with it)

On The Bench

What happens when the turtle who's known for taking the big hits and being the team protector ends up being the one that others have to look out for? ((post s2 finale, Raph has to deal with suddenly being the one that people are fretting over/protective of after he gets seriously injured in battle))

Mind Over Kraang-Matter

“...I guess it makes sense,” Donnie admitted, “That you’d be worried about… that happening again. But besides the fact that the Kraang don’t have any control over you anymore, you shouldn’t be trying to restrain yourself or- or punish yourself for being controlled in the first place, Raph. We know that you’d never try to hurt us, and you know that too. The thing that did try to hurt us wasn’t you, it was a complete different-!”

“But that’s-!” Raph stopped himself. He didn’t want to snap at Donnie again, so he took another deep breath before continuing, his voice quieter now. “But that’s the problem. I know the Kraangified me wasn’t actually me and was a totally different thing, but… but I still worry that it’s still in there somewhere, waiting to come out and take over again.”

“Okay… Why do you think that it’s going to take over again?”

Raph gave a hollow laugh, keeping his eyes locked on the floor. “I mean… Come on, Don. The whole thing with the Kraang… It wasn’t the first time that someone else was able to 'take over' while I was blacked out...”

(OR: Raph copes with the mental aftermath of being Kraangified, and Donnie insists on helping him find a better way to cope.) ((Post-Movie, obvi))

Cracked Shield

“Heh, you're one to talk, big bro. Hero moves are totally your style…”

Even if they ended up not being Leo’s last words to him, Raph still had a feeling that they would haunt him for the rest of his life.

(It's easy being the one who protects, the one who saves others. It's not nearly as easy being the one who gets saved...) ((Post-Movie, obvi))

-----

So yeah! While I’ve got plenty of other fics that feature Raph, these are all the ones that are majorly focused on him and/or his relationships with other characters. And you can read these AND all my other RotTMNT fanfics on AO3, my username there is JustAndrea: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JustAndrea/pseuds/JustAndrea

[fluideli123]

With raph having eldest daughter syndrome, and red protects raph, does that mean red has mamma bear syndrome?

This ask is really funny to me, and I mean that in a good way LMAO 

The image of Red being really motherly towards Raph is funny to me because Mind holds the mother vibes of the system. They literally cannot harm a fly unless anyone in the system is in danger and will fuck someone up, even if it isn't physically like Red does. 

Red: *Gets told he has Mother Bear Syndrome* 

Mind, who has spent literal years taking care of Raphael's emotional needs in Splinter's absence, Savage's physical injuries whenever he fronts and in the inner world. And has even made sure Red doesn't harm the body as well as himself in multiple ways: Haha, what? 

Plus, I feel Mind wouldn't be offended by Red getting dubbed the Mama Bear Syndrome. They accept that Red is much more aggressively protective and hence the reason as to why he gets dubbed the term, and would instead pull instances in which Red doesn't fit the 'criteria.' One main point is that Red doesn't protect Raph like a mother, like Mind. 

Because Mind reacts to things dubbed as "motherly" instincts, such as pulling a younger Raphael from nearly running into danger when Splinter isn't paying attention by slipping and falling into the sewer, for instance. Red reacts to more upfront threats, like getting punched by a villain and needing to respond quickly, and Raphael's emotional state getting compromised because of Raphael's family.

Which, when I put it like that, might not make sense. Okay- lemme reiterate lol XD

Mind has more of a motherly/guardian relationship with Raphael and Savage, while Red has a...different relationship with Raphael. Mind protects out of care, unconditional love, and when the times call for it. They step in when they know that Raphael or anyone else can't handle something independently and need someone to step in accordingly. Only a few times do they completely front to address a situation as a complete actual mother bear because it's one of the only triggers that allow such a front rejected individual like Mind to get pulled into the front. Plus, the older the body gets, the harder it is to completely front. And yes, their trigger does involve Splinter's neglect of his sons, intentional or not. 

Red steps in out of a sense of duty and out of a strange sort of slightly misguided attempt to keep only Raphael out of harm's way, whether the situation calls for it or not, almost like possession but not. I'm not sure how to describe it without outright saying it, and it's important to the plot of the next fic I'll be writing after SAA, and I don't want to spoil LMAO. But just think of it as something that isn't a familial need to protect but something much different, that if this person was to get hurt, it would be unbearable. Because Raphael getting injured in a situation scares the hell out of Red, and that's why they do everything in their power to protect Raphael, no matter what. It isn't motherly; it's...it's very, very distinct. 

It's actually something Mind, and Red fight a lot about, Red's strange misguided need to protect Raphael at any cost, even if it means the integrity of the system or Red's existence. Mind argues that it's suffocating to Raphael's need to be his own individual, his independence, and his evolving ability to work on things on his own that weren't unfairly placed on his shoulders as eldest. Mind is free from the hold Red's fear has on him because, of course, Mind still cares about Raphael and his safety, but there's a difference between simply protecting someone because it's essential and protecting someone out of fear. One leads to a safety net and growth, while the other causes issues and stifles someone's interactions with everyday problems. 

It's just- Red isn't a bad guy, just like Mind isn't some angel. They're complex in their own ways, but Red has issues regarding Raphael's safety, and it's one of the few things Mind won't allow if they can help it. Mind's priority is keeping everyone safe, not just Raph, and that's what Red disagrees with because everything is about Raphael for him. 

This creates these odd instances with Raphael's family where despite being close with Leo, he would destroy everything with him for Raphael's sake which- that sentence alone should tell you how it's a super Not The Right Move. I don't know, it's just- I love Red; there's so much about him I can't talk about because it ties into that main plot point in my future fic, but MAN, IT'S JUST- *holds him gently*

Also, I say "Raphael growing up" and not everyone else or just the body growing up because Raphael identifies with the body the most, hence his appearance in the inner world and the fact it feels like he grew up with the body. (Not because Raphael is the "original" because- just- no, I don't like thinking of the main fronter as the original, it doesn't sit right with me at all). But again, discussing his identification with the body is another spoiler and just- a whole nother can of worms uinhtuinhythyniw4t5hy45hyr

Also, I have once again rambled WAY TOO MUCH about my Shard System, and I cannot answer a single ask without dumping all my thoughts out. I apologize, LMAO

But that being said, I love this; I love the fact you sent in this ask because it's just- it makes me happy even if it's most likely a joke I once again rambled about instead of making a Ha Ha Funny uhtujgytrfdfgt6

Thank you so much for the ask. They're always a blast to answer <3

[tortugatime]

Hi!! I was just checking out ur au so i was wondering if you could talk a bit about raph some more! Hes my fav and i absolutely love your design for him. Your whole au looks super awesome and i cant wait to see more about it! <33

aww i'm happy you like my au!!

raph is the first to have gotten "lost", due to splinter having believed him to have died from his injuries. due to how traumatic of an event it was for him (combined with him. literally being five years old + his head injury), he doesn't remember most of the night in question, nor does he remember his childhood before meeting draxum. everything he does know was filled in by what draxum assumed happened, hence why raph believes his brothers to all be dead (quite ironic, given what mikey believed…)

him and draxum have a very complicated relationship, always toeing the line between soldier and commander, mentor and mentee, and father and son. draxum tried to raise raph (who he dubbed as "red") to be the mutant soldier he created him to be, but he also grew quite attached. raph/red on the other hand refers to draxum as his master of sorts, but sees him as more of a mentor/caregiver. this complicated nature both incorporates to how long it takes for raph to return to the lair with mikey and draxum's redemption later on.

now for some fun trivia about raph :D

- draxum was originally going to call him green (due to remembering how lou jitsu had called him such), but changed his mind for unknown reasons. totally not because of raph.

- raph owns three teddy bears, two being gifts from huginn and muninn and the last being from draxum. draxum has stitched up their tears for him multiple times.

- bringing up his childhood before being taken in by draxum is an incredibly triggering topic for raph, due to him having suppressed it for so long. with time he starts working through it, but it's still very sensitive for him

- ffau!raph can control his anger similar to how his canon counterpart can, but his control over it is moreso like a switch; he keeps it under control most of the time, but then let's it all out during battles and training (sometimes entering a state similar to his savage mode)

thank you for enjoying my au!!!!

[thefaceman]

There's something I want to say: The Rise Boys are not that different from previous versions at their core. :)

Leo is a BIG example of this. Throughout the series, we can see Leo take charge and be serious (Man vs Sewers), think logically (The Gumbus), think of plans on the fly and 5 steps ahead of the enemy (nearly ever episode), and be super self-sacrificing (many..many episodes but mainly shows in the Maze of Death episode and Flush but Never Forgotten). There's also Leo's love of sci-fi movies that is a direct reference to 2012 Leonardo (Leo in that series loved a Star Trek parody called Space Heroes). Leo from other version DO in fact joke around when they can, his one liners are pretty universal. I have more examples with 2012 since I watched it recently, but in the episode where Donnie got hurt from Dr. Rockwell for the first time, Leo was the first to laugh and was the ONLY one making monkey puns with "I bet he went bananas". And in the one episode where Fishface gets his legs, Leo laughs, points his katanas at him, and says "Look, sushi that delivers itself!". Leo appears more laid-back because, well, he is. He doesn't have the crushing weight of oldest brother AND leader on his shoulders. Take that aspect away and we have the Leonardo we all know and love from Rise.

Raph is the second biggest example. In previous versions, he see an angry brute. But that's really not the case. In Ries, we get a look at a Raph that's the oldest, the one that must be the most responsible and HAS to keep his anger buried deep within himself. Most people don't catch this but, Raph is actually quite gentle and protective of his family (and that includes friends since they see them as family too). It's hard to catch sometimes because of his anger problem, but there are moments that really bring it in. Such as the goofing off that he does with Mikey in the 2003 version. Or the many times he has comforted Mikey in the 2012 version (he has moments with the others but Mikey and Raph in the 2012 version are the closests out of the 4 bros). Raph in Rise though, he DOES get highly irritated at times. Like when things don't go as planned, when his brothers don't follow his orders (main example is the Pizza Puffs episode), or when someone else is telling him what to do. Raph LITERALLY says that last one in the Donnie's Gifts episode about the helmet that was barking orders at him, "Well my gift just keeps nagging me. I don't need to be told what to think." I predict that's gonna be a really BIG issue in the movie and we may or may not get the famous Leo vs Raph fight that we usually see from the other versions. In fact, I believe that Savage Raph (Man vs Sewer) might actually be a result of suppressed anger. Raph's not afraid of BEING ALONE, he's afraid of the actions he'll do in that angered state of mind. Raph also has a deep emotional connection to animals like with 2012 Raph.

Donnie IS a little different on the surface of his character, cynical and a "bad boy" but there are times where parts of the other versions pop in. Donnie is a tech genius, not always the smartest in things like emotions or, in some cases, pop culture. Much like the two previous versions. He's sassy and sarcastic, something that has gotten more and more amplified through each incarnation of the Turtles. Donnie in 2012 even created his own tech-bo (though...it didn't end well), and had a space staff that was similar to the bo that Donnie has in Rise. However....it really bothers me when people complain about Donnie's bo-staff when that "simple stick" can break someone's skull open (like Mikey's nunchaku).

Mikey's well...Mikey. He's goofy, loves to have fun, and is the most educated in emotions and pop culture. He's the adorable baby of the family but can also be a little devil in disguise when he wants something, and in previous versions, that aspect of his personality was mostly to bug the crap out of his brothers. They did add two things to his character that I thought were interesting: That he can cook decent food (all Mikey's love cooking but Rise Mikey is actually good at it) and they gave him the love of art that was given to Raph in 2012.

My my...Sorry this so long QvQ

But thank you for anyone who stuck around to read the whole thing! ^^

[davids-cartoon-corkboard]

Y’all know my theory at this point: when Raph was little he got separated from his family somehow and had to survive on his own for a while; the trauma from this caused him to develop DID.

It’s pretty clear Savage Raph formed specifically out of that isolation/survival trauma, but we met a third alter in “Pizza Puffs”, who I am calling “Red” for now. What’s his deal? When did he form and why?

-----

Raph: These guys are lost without me! Maybe I should help them.

Red: Make them do it themselves. It’s the only way they’ll learn.

Raph: But they’re just kids!

Red: And you can make them men!

-----

Raph: I gotta get in there!

Red: No. They’ll never learn if you always help ‘em, Raph.

Raph: But I can’t just sit here.

Red: This is for their own good.

-----

Raph: I knew you guys could do it.

Red: No you didn’t! I did!

Raph: Oh, you wanna go?

Red: Bring it.

-----

While Savage fronts when Host can’t handle being literally alone, Red spoke up in “Pizza Puffs” because Host was struggling to deal with being sort of... metaphorically alone? In that his brothers were dying a little bit and weren’t taking him or the situation seriously. Normally “it’s not good to be too dependent on others”, “kids need to grow up” and “sometimes you have to do things you don’t like” are good life lessons, but in this particular situation the life lessons should have waited until after the boys weren’t poisoned anymore. Sure, they pulled through, but Raph staying behind added an unnecessary level of risk. There’s a level of disjointedness between Raph and Red that I’m hoping will be explored and resolved in the future.

New alters form when preexisting alters are unable to handle whatever is going on in their life. What situation would Raph have been in for Red to form? When was “be independent/grow up/do something you don’t like” important? "Pizza Puffs” was the first time we’ve seen Raph do a solo mission, but it’s not the first time something like that has been mentioned.

“You went out on your own when you were [Mikey's] age.”

Thirteen is a very lonely age to be. I’m thinking events went something like this: Raph started hitting puberty at around 12/13 and Everything Was Awful. He was suddenly a lot bigger and stronger than he was used to, so he would accidentally break things around the lair more often, or get a little too rough when playing. I know we tend to poke fun at the “nobody understands me and everything sucks” mindset teens fall into, but as a mutant, Raph’s world was so, so small. Disconnected from his brothers, whose minds hadn’t hit the same milestones yet. Disconnected from his father, who would be passed out in the middle of a “Scorpion Treadmill” marathon whenever Raph needed guidance. Disconnected from April, a normal human girl who lived a normal human life he could never have.

Raph’s temper is relatively mellow now, but back then? Under those circumstances? He went too far.

And then he ran off topside, shame and nausea biting at the leftover fury in his heart.

In previous iterations, this is when he would run into a certain masked vigilante. But not in this universe. Not on this night. Casey wasn’t out pummeling pickpockets, she was training at the Foot dojo. They wouldn’t meet until “Hot Soup: The Game”, a couple of years later.

So Raph curled up on a roof somewhere with only his awful, awful thoughts for company. His little brother had been so scared of him... he couldn’t go back and face his family after what he had almost done. But he couldn’t stay up here alone either. What could he do?

Grow up.

He’s stronger now, and he has to be braver, too. He knows the way back home and there’s nothing out here that can hurt him. He can stand to be alone for a bit.

But he can’t stay here forever. He’ll have to go back home and do what he can to make things right, no matter how much it hurts.

So Red breathed in the cold night air for a while, and then retraced his steps back to the lair.

-----

But how are Raph and Casey going to properly meet? We saw her get kidnapped by that shadow thingy at the end of “Always Be Brownies”, so the resolution to that whole situation should be involved somehow.

Draxum gave Big Mama an orb covered in clawed, three-fingered hands. Then we see that Big Mama’s new assistant has such hands, as does the entity that took Meat Sweats and Casey. Clearly Big Mama is having her assistant kidnap people to fight in her “Fantabulous Battle Nexus Wizbang”. The turtles will be pulled into this because you can’t just not have your protagonists participate in the tournament arc.

We have yet to see Casey go well and truly Apeshit, because her previous fights have always had a certain level of shenanigans to them. Mikey fought her with an umbrella and a beach ball. Leo shoved a portal under her feet. She accidentally slashed up a corpse flower and fell into the goo. Her bonding moment with Splinter made her less willing to fight. The FBNW will give her the opportunity to show us what she can really do by pitting her against an opponent who is no-nonsense, one hundred percent ready to throw down.

Who could possibly be a better opponent for her than Savage Raph? (Perhaps Big Mama’s shadow captured the Sando Brothers, and they gave Big Mama information on a better fighter in exchange for their freedom?)

The two are evenly matched, of course, but the fight gets interrupted by the other turtles causing a mass breakout thanks to Leo’s emergency leader skills. Savage runs into his brothers amidst the chaos and they get Host to switch back in again. They defeat Big Mama and her shadow together and head home, yay huzzah plot concluded.

Casey, forgotten, also escapes and sneaks off to brood somewhere.

-----

A few episodes later, Red slips away to cool off for a bit (a habit that formed when he did, a way to decompress whenever they felt their temper getting the better of them) and happens to see some hockey mask-wearing lunatic picking fights with pickpockets. He hops down and holds her back, letting the would-be thieves get away with their skulls intact. “Listen, I get that you’re mad, but you can’t just go around-” And then he gets a baseball bat to the head.

"Back for round two, are you?!”

Red shakes the stars out of his eyes. That voice sounds familiar. “Hey, I don’t wanna fight you! Pops told us you left the Foot, we don’t have to be enemies anymore! Your heart’s in the right place with this whole crimefighting thing, but you’re going too far.”

Casey laughs a laugh that’s more taunt than humor. “Crimefighting? You think that’s what this is?” She gestures at the direction the thieves went with her scuffed and bloody bat. “This is training! You ran from our fight in the Nexus and I have been itching to beat you ever since. Die, coward!”

Red just barely manages to dodge the second bat swing. “What are you talking about? I never even saw you in the Nexus!”

They trade blows for a bit, Red’s attempts to calm her drowned by Casey screaming and cursing out this “lying turtle scum”. “Where is your fury? What happened to your viciousness? Why won’t you give me a real fight this time? Why are you holding back?!”

Her voice fades and all Red hears is the high shrieks and low roars of a crowd, harsh lights dulling the twin moons set in the green sky above as she lunges towards him and-

The bat hits his side with such force that the wood cracks a little, knocking the wind out out him despite his sturdy shell.

Casey stops bludgeoning him to better focus on gloating. “That move didn’t work on you last time. Did the first hit scramble your brains?”

Red kicks her feet out from under her and bolts, running back to the lair as quickly as he can manage with his head full of sights and sounds he can’t quite grab onto.

-----

Leo had stayed up to wait for his brother to return, so he grabs the first aid kit the moment Red emerges from the sewer tunnel. He starts to ask what happened as he unspools a roll of bandages, but Red asks a question instead. "What happened at the Nexus while I was... gone?"

Leo knows what he means, and the sun starts to rise as he fills in the gaps in his brother's memory.

-----

Casey’s ankle is twisted from Red's kick, so she can’t run after him for more than a few steps before falling over. Limping back home, she puts on her motivational Lou Jitsu playlist and begins to scheme.

---

For the record, I do think Raph and Casey will eventually become friends. But in the meantime... what kind of superhero doesn’t have a nemesis? :)

[brightlotusmoon]

A little more Spirit And Oxygen

Here’s another sneak peak at my TMNT fic, “Spirit And Oxygen: Across The Universe” which is part of my “Mikey The Lifegiver” fic series. It chronicles Mikey’s adventures in major depression, brain damage, and being the actual heart and soul and light of the team. http://archiveofourown.org/series/599863 This will probably be the final story, which means it might as well be a chapter fic, which means that this is officially Chapter One. Yes. I feel good about this. Stuff that is my heacanon here:  1) Shinigami is in a polyamorous relationship with Karai and Michelangelo, and the ladies have their own bedroom in the lair. 2) Raph has taken a shine to Shini and her attitudes on life and is so proud his little brother has such an awesome loveperson who is also banging his awesome sister. 3) April has finally decided to try dating both Donnie and Casey, although she’s spent more time with Don, and Casey doesn’t mind. 4) Splinter and Shredder are dead. Shredder killed Splinter and then the boys teamed up with Karai to kill Shredder, and Leo decapitated Shredder after Karai punched Shredder in the heart after Mikey knocked out Shredder with a kick to the face. Shredder’s henchmen have teamed up with Purple Dragons and other gangs, and have recreated robot Foot ninjas. Splinter appears as a spirit to the Hamato family. 5) The Mighty Mutanimals are very involved in the turtles’ lives. Mondo has learned first aid from Dr Rockwell and engineering from Don. 6) Leo and Karai have been duel sensei-ing and still argue over who gets to be Actual Sensei. 7) Abandoned military bases are turned into hide-outs for the more vicious, feral, and angry mutants in every borough. Mikey, Mondo, and Shini like to try and find them to befriend the tamer, friendlier ones. Karai and Raph wind up getting angry out of love and fear. 8) Mikey is Donnie’s assistant in the lab and is a field medic who uses his emotional empathic reach to comfort the injured; he can be telepathic when he tries hard, but it gives him migraines. 9) Mikey has developed epilepsy following a brain injury, but it also boosts his spiritual powers. He and Raph share an empathic connection. ...I really got attached to Deanna Troi and Jean Grey when I was a teenager, okay? Also, I am happy to discuss where the rest of the story might go and how and why. I’ll often switch to several perspectives in one chapter, like April (Storm) or Karai (Iron) or Ghost Of Splinter (Wind) or Shinigami (Magic). Mostly I’m just in love with writing Donnie talking about Mikey.  (PS, Mikey is Oxygen, duh. Don is Earth, Raph is Fire, Leo is Water. The Tumblr post for Mikey The Lifegiver is the second most popular blog post I’ve written so far. The first one is me waxing pagan about winter gods) Also, for my regular readers: You knew this sort of thing was gonna happen again. It’s all I write. Apparently, though, since 1999, I’ve had the most  wonderful contemporaries and competition. You hardcore Mikey fans, you’re the best, I love you all.

Donnie’s dreaming hard again, and he cherishes it. Usually is dreams are soft and quick, minnows in a stream, full of chrome and rust and the scent of oil, and there are tiny things in his hands, beeping and whirring, and there are giant things in front of him, clicking and rumbling; and the scars all over his hands reminds him that these are his, he made them, and they make sounds at him as though they are praising him.

Almost a year ago, shortly after Splinter died and Shredder died and Karai moved in, things began happening that challenged every science imaginable, but Donnie learned to be completely fine with it. Aside from Leo and Karai in a constant subtle battle over who would be sensei, Raph mellowed out and Mikey stopped pranking. Donnie was the only one who recognized Mikey as the catalyst: after enduring a series of traumas that they wouldn’t wish on their enemies, Mikey had become quieter, softer. His odd hyperfocusing moments turned on books without pictures and science documentaries and Donnie spent three weeks spying on him; it was no surprise when Mikey caught him each time, because Mikey had changed the most. Donnie and April ran every single test, and Mikey endured them with a strange fidgeting patience, but Rockwell in the end explained that Mikey’s Dimension X brain had finally caught up with him. He was almost like April. Don stopped being surprised when a beaker full of An Unusual Chemical dropped from his hands and floated back up to the table, despite it only being him and Mikey. Mikey, who folded his arms and grinned cheekily, and that was the day Donnie went to the closet and handed him a lab coat with his name on it.

Between their rotating autistic traits and interests, Donnie with engineering and physical science and Mikey with social sciences and cultural studies, they managed to create Things that made the lair easier to live in. With Mikey around, it was easier to navigate the entire city and study humans’ patterns, so certain stores, warehouses, junkyards, and clinics would stay their “borrowing” targets. With Donnie around, they had vehicles and cloaking devices to move further and deeper in.

So Donnie dreams heavily, about jumping from roof to roof in Staten Island, looking for that one military facility that up until now always had staff. Mikey is right behind him, ready with both kusarigama and grappling hook. Donnie stops and signals, and Mikey presses right against his carapace, wrapping one arm around his waist, extending the other to aim the grappling gun. Don signals again, and Mikey pushes off and practically flies – scratch that, he literally glides – and Donnie feels perfectly utterly safe as he casually throws an arm around his little brother’s shoulders. Mikey wouldn’t let them drop; they’d only hover. That’s how good he’s gotten. The grappling hook keeps catching on roof edges and Mikey lets it hover and glide to the next and the next, and they keep going.

They’re on the roof of the facility, over a mile from where they started, and Donnie pries open the secret door and they move in, and their flashlights roam. They remove their backpacks when he finds the correct room, and collect the items he’s already listed on his T-Phone. It’s silent, it’s swift, and the only thing that warns him is Mikey’s hiss and his voice in Donnie’s head: Donnie, get DOWN—

And Donnie flattens himself on the floor and the creature grazes him with a long metal toe as it leaps over him, and his right shoulder and bicep both rip open wide and his body spills blood rapidly. But it’s not the pain that makes him scream. It’s the strangled screeching gasp, full of pure agony and horror, that Mikey makes from somewhere behind him. No living creature should be making a sound like that unless it’s about to die...

There is precious seconds of heavy silence, and he hears Mikey make that familiar, inhuman growl that all the turtles make when enraged, when their human sides shrink and their literal reptilian brains take over with crushing power. The creature howls in pain and shock, and Mikey lets out a roar that contains Donnie’s name scrawled into it, and then there is crashing, there is stabbing, punching, shrieking, snarling, bones cracking and flesh squelching and liquid spurting and other noises that Donnie will hear in his post-traumatic nightmares. Donnie crawls forward, collapses on his back, turns around and forces himself to stand.

The creature has Mikey pinned to the ground, and shadowed blood is pooling everywhere. And then Mikey kicks and flips the creature over with a furious shriek, and through the darkness Donnie sees his teeth flash in a savage grin, you do not want to see that kind of smile on Mikey’s face, and Donnie sees him coated in shadows, launching again at the creature, smacking his nunchaku again and again…and then the creature stops moving, stops making noise; and Donnie hears his own harsh, pained breathing, and his brother’s harsh, pained breathing, and he manages to call out, “Mikey, are you okay?”

There’s a pause. “I’m always okay, Dee,” comes a breezy reply, but it is thin and strained. “Hey, Dee, what’s hurt on you?”

“My right shoulder and upper arm, but I can patch it up. You?”

A longer pause, much much longer.

“Can I take a raincheck on answering that?”

Donnie feels his gut turn to ice. “Mikey?”

He sees the dark figure of his brother hold up a finger. “Just…gimme…a sec.”

Within that second, Mikey falls to his knees. Donnie feels himself lurch forward. His eyes strain. The shadows on his brother are not shadows. They are too shiny. He’s covered in it.

No. No. Please, no, not again, I can’t handle this again.

It’s not the blood loss making Donnie feel so dizzy. He struggles to move, and watches, in slow motion, as Mikey falls over completely, smacking the floor, and it is a wet smack, and liquid is still pooling around him. And Don starts to hyperventilate, because he’s not sure where the light switch might be in this room and where the first aid kits are, and suddenly the darkness is too dark and the floor opens up and he is being swallowed, and he cannot reach Mikey, and then he falls, and as he falls his T-Phone rings, and something presses its energy button, and it’s blaring in his ears, louder and louder, calling MIkey’s name.

Donatello bolts up screaming, and it is too dark and he can’t see. A door crashes open. A body launches at him, and before he can take another breath, a pair of arms are wrapped around him and a plastron is pressed against his, and his chin is on a broad muscley shoulder, and the scent he breathes in is pure Raphael.

“Raph,” he squeaks out. “Hey--”

“Sshhh, Donnie, easy,” the hoarse voice murmurs. “It was a dream. You’re okay.”

He finds himself awkwardly patting his older brother’s upper carapace, trying to politely pull away. “Raph…Raph, I realize that…can I breathe? Please?”

Raph pulls away, green eyes serpentine in the darkness of his bedroom. The way his head tilts, too.

“I’m fine, Raph. I promise. I know it’s a nightmare.”

Those eyes and that head tilt remain fixed on him.

“Donnie, this is your fourth nightmare. Do you realize that?”

Really?

“Um. No?” He’s been so busy between his lab and the sectioned-off infirmary that Rockwell and Slash and Casey helped build that he sometimes doesn’t remember going to bed.

“Well, it is. And I’ll bet it’s the exact same one. Yours are weird.” Raph sits back, agura style, and Donnie draws his knees up to make room. “They’re like clockwork. Once a week. And, y’know, this is the fourth week since--”

“I know. And you guys dragged me to my own bed when you knew I wouldn’t stay here.”

“You did this time,” Raph points out.

“True. Wait, I did?”

“Congratulations on a full twelve hours of sleep, bro. It’s ten in the morning.”

Donnie feels his eyes grow wide. He throws the covers off and jumps off his bed. “I’m missing work, I--”

Raph’s strong hand slaps against his chest. “Remember what we all agreed on? Until your shoulder and arm is fully functional, you don’t do anything complex without someone helping you. I hope you were planning on asking someone.”

Donnie narrows his eyes. “Do you know how to handle the complex alien chemicals I need to work on? Plus the newer components of the retromutagen?”

“If not me, you have April. Or Rockwell. Or Shini.”

Donnie sighs, looks at his immobilized arm, and sighs again.

“You’re a stubborn bastard, Hamato Donatello.”

“You’re worse.”

“I am a paragon of complacency, little brother.”

And Donnie winces. “Try not to call me that?”

“Oh. Right. I forgot. You’re right. Sorry, Don.”

Donnie sighs and gets dressed.

“Um.” Raph rubs the back of his head. “So, nothing’s changed this morning. That’s…like, good, right? Kinda?”

“Kinda,” Donnie says. “It means that Mikey is continuing to heal. Which is the best we can hope for in this situation.”

As he heads out of his room and toward the lab doors, Raph catches up. “You should eat something first.”

“I need to check his vitals and change his IV bags.”

“Karai did that.”

“Even the GI tube?”

“Yeah, that one too.”

Donnie pauses. “I just need to see…”

“Donnie.” Raph is impossibly firm, and very soft. “Donnie, everything you could do has been done. We’ve watched you and learned from you for a whole month. It’s a routine. And part of the routine is that those of us who aren’t doing the routine help ourselves first. It’s your turn.”

Donnie is very silent as Raph steers him toward the kitchen. Leo is finishing up a plate of eggs, toast, and tea. Shinigami is making two more plates.

“Oh, you got him up! Good morning, Donatello. Did your nightmare complete itself?” The witch’s smile is knowing and polite, and he has gotten used to her specific brand of sass. She is, after all his little brother’s girlfriend and his sister’s girlfriend.

He mumbles “yes” because shrugging his shoulders still hurts. He eats mechanically, even as he is poked at to make conversation. Raph has started giving him daily protein shakes. There is one next to his plate. He drinks it and crushes the bottle, casually proving how fine he is. Sometimes the others forget how strong he is.

He misses having Mikey around to defend him.

“I’ll be in the infirmary,” Shinigami says, and Donnie startles. When he looks at her, he sees dark, deep circles under her eyes. Her fair complexion is blotchy and even paler than usual. And he wants to slap himself. She loves him. She has so much love, she loves Mikey and Karai so much. And Karai, to see her baby brother like this. Abruptly, he stands up, wraps his arms around Shini, and grips her like one of Mikey’s famous octopus hugs.

She simply buries her face in his neck and holds him tight.

 * * * *

Donnie is at his computer. As he’s reading and copying notes, he can’t help but hear her from the infirmary corner, and after a while he gives up trying to ignore it. He stretches his neck to catch a glimpse.

Shinigami has been sitting by Mikey’s bedside for fifteen minutes, and she only started speaking a couple of minutes ago. Don sees her hand tighten around Mikey’s as she talks.

“…keeps insisting nothing hurts, of course, but I refuse to believe her. Even when she shifted back and forth to her snake form, I could tell her arm was giving her trouble. Even the snake looked sad!” A small laugh, humorless. “Oh, sweet Mikey, you should see the looks she gives me when I point out her pain. She thinks I don’t see it. I see everything about her.” A pause. “I see everything about you too, you know. I see the subtle shifts in your facial muscles when you slip one of your behavior masks on. You know what I mean. When you fake smile, or your laugh is not real? I see it. You should not ever be sad, my Mikey. I told Karai I would do anything to protect her. Now that promise extends to you. Therefore, you must recover from this. You must hold me again so I can tell you I love you. You must hold me tightly, like an octopus, and laugh into my hair, and spin me around, and talk about your comics and your television shows. Tell me about Hamato Yoshi and how he adored you. Tell me about your brothers and your adoration of each of them, how they are your heroes. You and Donatello are very close. I know you wish to have so much knowledge and skill the way does.”

Donnie bites his lip and blushes a little. He almost feels like a sensei, in a way, the way Mikey looks at him while he works or while he is showing Mikey a project. He pictures the last lesson they’d had. April was there. She and Mikey were side by side, chins in their hands, looking at him lovingly, freckled faces and blue eyes alight, looking like mischievous twins.

He wants Mikey to wake up and look like that again.

He doesn’t know when Mikey will wake up. That hurts him most of all. This coma is different, deep and frightening. Mikey lost a lot of blood, and the mutant hit him in the neck, and Donnie knows how bad that can be. Concussion. Oxygen loss. Brain function compromised. Brain damage. Mikey already has enough. Donnie is worried.

Shini’s voice startles him.

“We miss you, Michelangelo. I miss you. I…need you. You must come back soon. Please.” And Donnie watches as Shinigami leans forward and presses her lips to Mikey’s, and smiles. She squeezes his limp, broken hand again. She stands up and begins to walk toward the door, then changes course, coming toward the lab. Donnie blinks at her.

She smiles at him. “What you working on?”

“Oh, um…” he glances down. “Taking notes on neurobiological function in humans and reptiles. I believe our brains are almost fully human, but we probably have neuronal and hormonal responses similar to diamondback turtles, too.”

“Mikey will sometimes make little noises,” Shini offers. “They’re not human.”

Donnie nods. “Yes. Chirping. Cooing. Growling. A kind of purring growl, like churring. Hissing.”

He shifted through the pages, wrote down some more notes.

“You aren’t going to do that all day, are you?”

Donnie glances up. Shini has leaned her hip against the table and is smirking. “Leo wants everyone in the dojo for training. Is this very important?”

He bites his lip, looks at his screen. “I guess it can wait until later.” He saves the file. Shinigami takes him by the elbow and steers him out of the lab. Interestingly, Raph is waiting there, arms crossed. He smirks and nods. “Good. Good Donnie.” Shinigami giggles, as if the two had planned it.

“How’s Mikey?” Raph asks, automatically.

Shini just shrugs. “The same. Karai wonders if I can use my witchcraft to find him in the astral plane. It is a thought.”

Raph raises an eyeridge. “Damn straight, it’s a thought. He’s been healing pretty well. Maybe it’s time to try reaching out to him instead of waiting for him to wake up.”

Donatello sits up straight and snaps his fingers. “It can be a family effort!” That seems to light a fire in Raphael, and he joyfully reaches out to fistbump Shinigami, who has a wide smirk on her face and a glint in her eye. Donnie feels stronger and happier than he’s felt in weeks.

[brightlotusmoon]

Sneak Peek: A “Mikey The Lifegiver” side story

So, while working on the “Spirit And Oxygen” fic, I got poked in the writerbrain by yet another “Donnie thinks about how much he adores Mikey” story that didn’t quite fit, but maybe it could, so right now it’s going to be a side story, at least until Season 5 rolls around and we get canon confirmation on some things.

Stuff that is my heacanon here: 1) Shinigami is in a polyamorous relationship with Karai and Michelangelo, and the girls have their own bedroom in the lair. 2) Raph has taken a shine to Shini and her attitudes on life and is so proud his little brother has such an awesome loveperson who is also banging his awesome sister. 3) April has finally decided to try dating both Donnie and Casey, although she’s spent more time with Don, and casey doesn’t mind. 4) Both Splinter and Shredder are dead (Karai killed Shredder, take that Leo, although Leo was there too and got some hits in). 5) The Might Mutanimals are very involved in the turtles’ lives. Mondo has learned first aid from Dr Rockwell and engineering from Don. 6) Leo and Karai have been duel sensei-ing and still argue over who gets to be Actual Sensei. 7) Abandoned military bases are turned into hide-outs for the more vicious, feral, and angry mutants in every borough. Mikey, Mondo, and Shini like to try and find them to befriend the tamer, friendlier ones. Karai and Raph wind up getting angry out of love and fear. 8) Mikey is Donnie’s assistant in the lab and is a field medic who uses his emotional reach to comfort the injured. I don’t know if any of it will reflect in real canon. We shall find out in March. I did see the Korean leaks and I’m not saying a damn word. Also, I am happy to discuss where the rest of the story might go and how and why, and I’ll probably switch to another perspective like April (Storm) or Karai (Iron) or Ghost Of Splinter (Wind) or Shinigami (Magic). Mostly I’m just in love with writing Donnie talking about Mikey, and this would be my third Earth And Oxygen fic in the “Mikey The Lifegiver” series.  (PS, Mikey is Oxygen, duh. Don is Earth, Raph is Fire, Leo is Water. The Tumblr post for Mikey The Lifegiver is the second most popular blog post I’ve written so far. The first one is me waxing pagan about all those winter holidays from dozens of religions with hundreds many gods) Also, for my regular readers: You knew this sort of thing was gonna happen again. It’s all I write. Apparently, though, since 1999, I’ve had the most  wonderful contemporaries and competition. You hardcore Mikey fans, you’re the best, I love you all.

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick, And think of you Caught up in circles confusion Is nothing new Flashback warm nights Almost left behind Suitcases of memories, Time after Sometimes you picture me I'm walking too far ahead You're calling to me, I can't hear What you've said You say go slow I fall behind The second hand unwinds If you're lost you can look and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting Time after time If you're lost you can look and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting Time after time After my picture fades and darkness has Turned to gray Watching through windows you're wondering If I'm ok Secrets stolen from deep inside The drum beats out of time If you're lost you can look and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting Time after time You said go slow I fall behind The second hand unwinds If you're lost you can look and you will find me Time after time If you fall I will catch you I'll be waiting Time after time

-Cyndi Lauper, “Time After Time”

 Earth And Oxygen: Time After Time

 Donnie’s dreaming hard again, and he cherishes it. Usually is dreams are soft and quick, minnows in a stream, full of chrome and rust and the scent of oil, and there are tiny things in his hands, beeping and whirring, and there are giant things in front of him, clicking and rumbling; and the scars all over his hands reminds him that these are his, he made them, and they make sounds at him as though they are praising him.

Almost a year ago, shortly after Splinter died and Shredder died and Karai moved in, things began happening that challenged every science imaginable, but Donnie learned to be completely fine with it. Aside from Leo and Karai in a constant subtle battle over who would be sensei, Raph mellowed out and Mikey stopped pranking. Donnie was the only one who recognized Mikey as the catalyst: after enduring a series of traumas that they wouldn’t wish on their enemies, Mikey had become quieter, softer. His odd hyperfocusing moments turned on books without pictures and science documentaries and Donnie spent three weeks spying on him; it was no surprise when Mikey caught him each time, because Mikey had changed the most. Donnie and April ran every single test, and Mikey endured them with a strange fidgeting patience, but Rockwell in the end explained that Mikey’s Dimension X brain had finally caught up with him. He was almost like April. Don stopped being surprised when a beaker full of An Unusual Chemical dropped from his hands and floated back up to the table, despite it only being him and Mikey. Mikey, who folded his arms and grinned cheekily, and that was the day Donnie went to the closet and handed him a lab coat with his name on it.

Between their rotating autistic traits and interests, Donnie with engineering and physical science and Mikey with social sciences and cultural studies, they managed to create Things that made the lair easier to live in. With Mikey around, it was easier to navigate the entire city and study humans’ patterns, so certain stores, warehouses, junkyards, and clinics would stay their “borrowing” targets. With Donnie around, they had vehicles and cloaking devices to move further and deeper in.

So Donnie dreams heavily, about jumping from roof to roof in Staten Island, looking for that one military facility that up until now always had staff. Mikey is right behind him, ready with both kusarigama and grappling hook. Donnie stops and signals, and Mikey presses right against his carapace, wrapping one arm around his waist, extending the other to aim the grappling gun. Don signals again, and Mikey pushes off and practically flies – scratch that, he literally glides – and Donnie feels perfectly utterly safe as he casually throws an arm around his little brother’s shoulders. Mikey wouldn’t let them drop; they’d only hover. That’s how good he’s gotten. The grappling hook keeps catching on roof edges and Mikey lets it hover and glide to the next and the next, and they keep going.

They’re on the roof of the facility, over a mile from where they started, and Donnie pries open the secret door and they move in, and their flashlights roam. They remove their backpacks when he finds the correct room, and collect the items he’s already listed on his T-Phone. It’s silent, it’s swift, and the only thing that warns him is Mikey’s hiss and his voice in Donnie’s head: Donnie, get DOWN—

And Donnie flattens himself on the floor and the creature grazes him with a long metal toe as it leaps over him, and his right shoulder and bicep both rip open wide and his body spills blood rapidly. But it’s not the pain that makes him scream. It’s the strangled screeching gasp, full of pure agony and horror, that Mikey makes from somewhere behind him. No living creature should be making a sound like that unless it’s about to die...

There is precious seconds of heavy silence, and he hears Mikey make that familiar, inhuman growl that all the turtles make when enraged, when their human sides shrink and their literal reptilian brains take over with crushing power. The creature howls in pain and shock, and Mikey lets out a roar that contains Donnie’s name scrawled into it, and then there is crashing, there is stabbing, punching, shrieking, snarling, bones cracking and flesh squelching and liquid spurting and other noises that Donnie will hear in his post-traumatic nightmares. Donnie crawls forward, collapses on his back, turns around and forces himself to stand.

The creature has Mikey pinned to the ground, and shadowed blood is pooling everywhere. And then Mikey kicks and flips the creature over with a furious shriek, and through the darkness Donnie sees his teeth flash in a savage grin, you do not want to see that kind of smile on Mikey’s face, and Donnie sees him coated in shadows, launching again at the creature, smacking his nunchaku again and again…and then the creature stops moving, stops making noise; and Donnie hears his own harsh, pained breathing, and his brother’s harsh, pained breathing, and he manages to call out, “Mikey, are you okay?”

There’s a pause. “I’m always okay, Dee,” comes a breezy reply, but it is thin and strained. “Hey, Dee, what’s hurt on you?”

“My right shoulder and upper arm, but I can patch it up. You?”

A longer pause, much much longer.

“Can I take a raincheck on answering that?”

Donnie feels his gut turn to ice. “Mikey?”

He sees the dark figure of his brother hold up a finger. “Just…gimme…a sec.”

Within that second, Mikey falls to his knees. Donnie feels himself lurch forward. His eyes strain. The shadows on his brother are not shadows. They are too shiny. He’s covered in it.

No. No. Please, no, not again, I can’t handle this again.

It’s not the blood loss making Donnie feel so dizzy. He struggles to move, and watches, in slow motion, as Mikey falls over completely, smacking the floor, and it is a wet smack, and liquid is still pooling around him. And Don starts to hyperventilate, because he’s not sure where the light switch might be in this room and where the first aid kits are, and suddenly the darkness is too dark and the floor opens up and he is being swallowed, and he cannot reach Mikey, and then he falls, and as he falls his T-Phone rings, and something presses its energy button, and it’s blaring in his ears, louder and louder, calling MIkey’s name.

Donatello bolts up screaming, and it is too dark and he can’t see. A door crashes open. A body launches at him, and before he can take another breath, a pair of arms are wrapped around him and a plastron is pressed against his, and his chin is on a broad muscley shoulder, and the scent he breathes in is pure Raphael.

“Raph,” he squeaks out. “Hey--”

“Sshhh, Donnie, easy,” the hoarse voice murmurs. “It was a dream. You’re okay.”

He finds himself awkwardly patting his older brother’s upper carapace, trying to politely pull away. “Raph…Raph, I realize that…can I breathe? Please?”

Raph pulls away, green eyes serpentine in the darkness of his bedroom. The way his head tilts, too.

“I’m fine, Raph. I promise. I know it’s a nightmare.”

Those eyes and that head tilt remain fixed on him.

“Donnie, this is your fourth nightmare. Do you realize that?”

Really?

“Um. No?” He’s been so busy between his lab and the sectioned-off infirmary that Rockwell and Slash and Casey helped build that he sometimes doesn’t remember going to bed.

“Well, it is. And I’ll bet it’s the exact same one. Yours are weird.” Raph sits back, agura style, and Donnie draws his knees up to make room. “They’re like clockwork. Once a week. And, y’know, this is the fourth week since--”

“I know. And you guys dragged me to my own bed when you knew I wouldn’t stay here.”

“You did this time,” Raph points out.

“True. Wait, I did?”

“Congratulations on a full twelve hours of sleep, bro. It’s ten in the morning.”

Donnie feels his eyes grow wide. He throws the covers off and jumps off his bed. “I’m missing work, I--”

Raph’s strong hand slaps against his chest. “Remember what we all agreed on? Until your shoulder and arm is fully functional, you don’t do anything complex without someone helping you. I hope you were planning on asking someone.”

Donnie narrows his eyes. “Do you know how to handle the complex alien chemicals I need to work on? Plus the newer components of the retromutagen?”

“If not me, you have April. Or Rockwell. Or Shini.”

Donnie sighs, looks at his immobilized arm, and sighs again.

“You’re a stubborn bastard, Hamato Donatello.”

“You’re worse.”

“I am a paragon of complacency, little brother.”

And Donnie winces. “Try not to call me that?”

“Oh. Right. I forgot. You’re right. Sorry, Don.”

Donnie sighs and gets dressed.

“Um.” Raph rubs the back of his head. “So, nothing’s changed this morning. That’s…like, good, right? Kinda?”

“Kinda,” Donnie says. “It means that Mikey is continuing to heal. Which is the best we can hope for in this situation.”

As he heads out of his room and toward the lab doors, Raph catches up. “You should eat something first.”

“I need to check his vitals and change his IV bags.”

“Karai did that.”

“Even the GI tube?”

“Yeah, that one too.”

Donnie pauses. “I just need to see…”

“Donnie.” Raph is impossibly firm, and very soft. “Donnie, everything you could do has been done. We’ve watched you and learned from you for a whole month. It’s a routine. And part of the routine is that those of us who aren’t doing the routine help ourselves first. It’s your turn.”

Donnie is very silent as Raph steers him toward the kitchen. Leo is finishing up eggs, toast, and tea. Shinigami is making two more plates.

“Oh, you got him up! Good morning, Donatello. Did your nightmare complete itself?” The witch’s smile is knowing and polite, and he has gotten used to her specific brand of sass. She is, after all his little brother’s girlfriend and his sister’s girlfriend.

He mumbles “yes” because shrugging his shoulders still hurts. He eats mechanically, even as he is poked at to make conversation. Raph has started giving him daily protein shakes. There is one next to his plate. He drinks it and crushes the bottle, casually proving how fine he is. Sometimes the others forget how strong he is.

He misses having Mikey around to defend him.

“I’ll be in the infirmary,” Shinigami says, and Donnie startles. When he looks at her, he sees dark, deep circles under her eyes. Her fair complexion is blotchy and even paler than usual. And he wants to slap himself. She loves him. She has so much love, she loves Mikey and Karai. And Karai, to see her baby brother like this. Abruptly, he stands up, wraps his arms around Shini, and grips her like one of Mikey’s famous octopus hugs.

She simply buries her face in his neck and holds him tight.