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#they just get incredibly confused by the fact that there seems to be another robot living behind this glass pane
malwarechips · 9 months
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yknow how a lot of animals dont recognise their own reflection in mirrors . untamed robots doing that thank you for coming to my tedtalk
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riversofmars · 4 months
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So I've finally finished listening to Echoes (yes I had this boxset preordered since it was announced, and yes I was incredibly slow to listen to it) and how do Liv/Helen shippers keep winning even when we've already lost (coz Liv returning to Tania at the end of Stranded)??
From episode 2: "Helen - she's my...she's everything I have left"???? I screamed??
Episode 3 where Helen went and got Liv's stuff from the TARDIS but also got her a book in case she can't sleep and a bottle of water and an apple???
Every boxset since Stranded has had Liv be ferally gay over Helen (and has obviously confirmed our favourite lesbian is in fact a lesbian ofc)
And I'm so confused by what Big Finish is doing playing with our hearts like this - but I will also gleefully, and gayfully accept whatever Liv/Helen we can get. Thoughts?
Honestly, I have no idea what Big Finish are thinking other than
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Who knows, maybe they have realised that Liv/Helen sells??? And that they made a mistake with the Stranded ending??
But seriously... I hope there is a point to it all. It really does feel like they're doing it on purpose, it's SO SHIPPY! Albie's Angels was just... HELEN CHENKA?! Come on. And you're so right. How easy would it have been to have Liv say "Helen is my best friend!". Having her break off mid-sentence is a conscious choice and you can't tell me otherwise. And that scene where Helen brings Liv all that stuff and then offers to go back? ADORABLE. They're everything.
Now the way I see it... For the ending of Stranded to make sense, it can only be one of two things really. Either Liv and Helen get together and Helen dies... and Liv returns to Tania cause she can't face being with the Doctor without Helen and she tries to bury her grief that way. It would be horrible and unfair, but it would make at least a little bit of sense, because why else would Liv Chenka, brilliant med-tech from the 30th century, want to be in 21st century London where she will be bored out of her mind and never see her sister again?? It just doesn't make sense for her character unless something fundamentally changed her like the death of the woman she loved. BUT LET'S NOT THINK LIKE THAT OR I'LL CRY.
The other option, and I'll hold on to this, is that maybe they all get a happy ending and there are two Livs somehow. We already know from the end of The Robots that there is a Liv duplicate out there. While that duplicate would only have the memories of up to Escape From Kaldor, that doesn't mean that something like that couldn't happen again. This is Doctor Who after all! Think of Rose getting her personal Doctor. Maybe they send a duplicate back to Tania so she gets to be happy too (and the Stranded ending that BF may have realised was silly will still work) and Liv and Helen stay together.
Honestly, who knows! But I will also hang on every scrap BF throw us. The Liv/Helen ship is sailing strong as ever and I think BF may have noticed and decided to cater to it.
I imagine it will be a while for another set for them (though I am curious as to Hattie's role in the Time War one, that will be interesting!) and I don't know if we will ever get a resolution for them, but in the meantime, I say let's be vocal about the ship on socials, hoping BF continue to take notice and give us everything we want. It seems to be working at the moment :D
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fatteningmenstories · 6 months
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At your service
part 2
The smell is what first hit him, it was gorgeous and so sweet it drew him straight in, Mr Gordo simply stepped back and let the jock take it all in, Alex couldn’t believe his eyes the entire room was made out of chocolate, in the centre of the room was an Olympic sized pool made out of chocolate, that flowed all the way through the room and seemingly out to the rest of the factory, where ever his eyes landed on he could see different kinds of chocolate ranging from white to dark to green minty and strawberry cheesecake chocolate in the all these different shapes- some were in the form of statues and others in the form of world famous paintings waiting to be eaten. Then suddenly just when he was about to reach and grab a piece of chocolate from a towering chocolate statue, the whole room started to move and almost seemed as if ti was coming alive , Alex couldn’t comprehend it, until Mr Gordo simply said look up,
As he moved his eyes up, he couldn’t believe it the whole roof was shifting and beeping, it had tubes of chocolate flowing all throughout but it was more than that it was as if it was waking up, that when he saw it long robotic metal arms being sprouted form holes all around the room and coming down to shake Mr Gordo’s hand.
“What you are seeing is probably the largest sentient ai in the factory, possibly the world, meet Unit.2”
“What…. But it massive it must control this whole room”
“Yes it does butit does so much more than just that , what do your thing makes my chocolate so good, Unit of course, it is constantly tasting and adjusting the chocolate that gets pumped around the entire factory”
“What…”
“And the best part about it is that its alive, hooked up the same mega mind that all robots share in this factory, so I would stay on its good side if I were you” chuckled Mr Gordo
“Oh and to forgot Its incredibly smart, what do you think made all these chocolate pieces of art huh kid’
Mr Gordo chuckled as Alex took in the chocolate Mona Lisa, done it incredible detail it was almost a prefect copy expect of course being made entirely out of chocolate
Alex needed a minute to take it all in, he needed to say anything smart yet profound he thought, but he was beaten to it as he felt his stomach rumble, and Mr Gordo gave out another chuckle
“Well excuse me, I promised you desert didn’t I, here lets take a seat and give unit something to work with’
However the moment Alex sat down, he felt himself being scanned and prodded by the numerous arms of Unit.2
“Oh why yes did I forgot to mention, Unit is able to found out what type and kind of desert you desire simply by giving you a quick scan”
Alex still couldn’t process what was happening, but the moment a chocolate sundae was produced with extra chocolate sauce, he knew that Mr Gordo was a true genius.
It was amazing, it was as if the chocolate he ate was produced just for him it was sweet and filling, and it met every deep down fix he needed, it was so good in fact he had to thank Unit for it. This was met with some lights being flashed and robotic parts resolving.
“Oh stop it Alex, you’re making Unit blush “, Mr Gordo said ibeetween bites of his own personalised dish, “Look it’s even giving you a gift”
A tube was quickly emerging from the pool filled in with deep brown chocolate and heading towards Alex, it stoped abruptly at Alex’s face.
“I think it wants you to put your mouth to the tube, and don’t look at me like that , it’s alive remember’
Alex sat there puzzled for a bit, he was behind confused already at units power
“Well hurry up, it doesn’t even let me drink form the river, that chocolate is the finest in the world , it has to be watered done per say for the masses to stop them going crazy”
Well when in an ai controlled chocolate room, Alex thought, as he put his mouth to the tube, which soon become filled with the most richest and delicious chocolate he could ever even comprehend, it only lasted a couple of seconds as the hot chocolate guzzled done Alex, before he couldn’t take it any more, and had to tap out. He was stuffed behind record, now coated in delicious chocolate that he couldn’t stop licking from his fingers.
“Well Alex I believe this is all I have time for today, you are allowed anyway in the factory aside from this room of course - safely protocols and so forth, so until tomorrow’
And as Mr Gordo plodded out, Alex needed a few minutes to digest the orgasmic chocolate he had just devoured, he think he might have cummed a bit.
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creatingevil · 1 year
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Dog Behind the Door: A teaser!
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“I’m studying engineering and robotics! I’ve always wanted to learn about it– i’ve been interested for years y’know– and so when I was able to get a scholarship, I spent no time wasting that opportunity.” ??? boasted, rambling about how he’d gotten here. He was such an open book in stark contrast to William and the people he was used to. ??? suddenly piped up again, interrupting his train of thought. “What are you studying? I bet it’s something like finances or business– you seem like a business type of guy.” He informed, speaking rather matter-of-factly as he did so. 
William took a step closer to his roommate and away from the door as he responded. “Ah, actually I’m... here for the same thing. What are the chances, ay?” He felt incredibly neutral about the fact they studied the same thing. He didn’t feel distaste toward ??? at all, no, just… confusion, but said feeling was bound to overwhelm him thanks to being in such a new place.
??? looked like he could explode, clearly having more than a neutral opinion on their shared course of study. William swore that his grin somehow stretched even wider. “We could be in the same classes!” He cheered, clasping his hands together. He then stood up and off the bed, pacing across the side of it as he flung himself into another tangent. “We’d make a great team, and we could group together for projects and have study nights–” It was safe to say that ??? was lost in another overexcited ramble.
??? ??? truly did remind William of Archie, but even his older brother was far… less. The man’s pacing left William following his movements, lending an ear. He was admittedly amusing to listen to, a character of many words and many thoughts to share with the world. William didn't think he was opposed to listening to everything he had to share.
Suddenly, ??? spun on his heels, stepping uncomfortably close to William and leaning forward. He winced at the sudden invasion, stepping back in an attempt to maintain some sort of distance from his roommates’ intense questioning. The man was far too close for comfort. William was always the kind of person with a very strict bubble. Invasion into this space left him feeling admittedly claustrophobic– like a fox trapped in a corner.
“Do you know what this means?”
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Chapter one coming soon!
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plaguedocboi · 4 years
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More scary waters, by popular demand!
Since my last post ranking bodies of water really, really blew up, I decided to make a second. Some of these were suggested by people (in which case I’ll credit them), and some were just ones that didn’t quite make the cut for the first list.
I’ll also be doing a third list ranking the most toxic bodies of water in the world, so stay tuned for that.
Also, keep in mind that these aren’t ranked by how dangerous they are. They’re ranked by how scary I, personally, find them. So if the rating seems off, it’s due to which ones inspire a visceral reaction in me and which ones don’t.
Silfra Rift, Iceland
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This one is something that I actually find very beautiful rather than scary, but it still seems like something that others might be freaked out by. The Silfra Rift is the point where the Eurasian and North American continental plates are pulling apart, creating a crack in the earth that filled with water. The water here is incredibly clear, and you can see all the way down to the bottom even in the deepest spots (which are almost 200 feet down, by the way). It’s the only place in the world where you can put your hands on two different continents at the same time! I’ve had the privilege of snorkeling here, and although it’s definitely deep, I wasn’t terribly scared due to the fact that the rift is just so beautiful. The only danger to swimmers is the temperature; it stays between 35-39 F year-round, meaning anyone getting into the water needs a full drysuit to avoid getting hypothermia or worse. I give the Silfra Rift a 1/10 fear rating because I thought I would be much more freaked out by it than I was.
Dragon Hole, China
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While not as visually striking as the Great Blue Hole in Belize, this sinkhole in China is the deepest “blue hole” in the world. This pit descends 987 feet down. This earns a 2/10 purely because this is just a goddamn hole in the ocean that’s almost 1,000 ft deep and I don’t care for that.
Lake Tanganyika, multiple countries (suggested by @iguessiamhere)
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This lake didn’t quite make the cut for the first list because it comes in second to Lake Baikal. It’s the second-oldest, second-deepest, and second-largest (by volume) lake in the world. But someday, Lake Tanganyika may be number 1, because just like Baikal, it’s a Rift Valley. It’s getting bigger every day, and in a few million years when Baikal is an ocean, Tanganyika might be the largest lake by default. Its 4,820 ft depth earns it a 3/10.
Lake Superior, US/Canada (suggested by multiple people)
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This is the largest of the Great Lakes, and the third-largest lake in the world. It reaches depths of over 1,000 feet and has a surface area of over 31,700 square miles. Lake Superior is the site of over 350 shipwrecks and contains roughly 10,000 dead bodies. The reason these bodies are never recovered is because the lake is very cold, and very deep. The lake bottom is essentially a sterile environment, where bodies are preserved for eternity instead of floating up as a normal body would. This lake holds onto her dead. 4/10 for sheer danger and alarming amount of dead bodies.
Cenote Angelita, Mexico ( @olive-k wanted a cenote, and this list has two!)
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This is a cenote with an underwater river running through it. No, I’m not kidding. Underwater rivers are actually quite common, but they rarely exist in places that humans can see them. Usually they’re caused by a current moving in a different direction than the majority of the water, or a boundary between water with different density (as is the case here). The “river” appearance in Angelita is enhanced by dead trees, giving the appearance of a bank. For the first 100 feet, this cave has regular freshwater. But a little deeper lies a layer of hazy hydrogen sulfate, and beneath that is 100 feet of salt water. This ranks 5/10 because can you imagine descending towards a hazy patch of water and branches that you assume is the bottom, only to pass right through it and see a gaping black expanse beneath? No thanks.
Devil’s Hole, Nevada
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As a biologist, this is somewhere that I actually want to visit. This tiny waterhole in the desert is the only place that the endangered Devil’s Hole Pupfish lives. But we’re not here to learn about cute fish, we’re here to read about unsettling waterways. And hooo boy, this one is pretty weird. Because despite its appearance, this isn’t a little rainwater pool. It’s the opening to a huge cave system, which reaches depths of at least 500 feet. We’re not totally sure, though, because the bottom has never been mapped, and several people have died trying to attempt it. 6/10, since it’s very deep, hasn’t been fully mapped, and is apparently haunted.
Eagle’s Nest Sinkhole, Florida
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There is literally a sign in front of this sinkhole that reads “STOP. Prevent your death. There is nothing in this cave worth dying for” accompanied by a picture of the Grim Reaper. Need I say more? Probably not, but I will anyway. This sinkhole is the only surface opening to a cave system that stretches several miles and plunges to over 300 feet deep. Miles of twisting, confusing, narrow passages with only one exit make for an extremely dangerous cave system. For some fucking reason, it’s a very popular dive site. At least 11 people have died here since the 80’s, and is referred to as the “Underwater Mt Everest” because of how dangerous it is. 7/10.
Zacatón, Mexico
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This cenote was literally considered “bottomless” for a long time, because no one could find the bottom. Multiple expeditions were attempted, including one where a man died after reaching 925 feet without finding the end. It took a multi-million dollar operation funded by NASA to find the bottom of this hole. I’m not kidding. Turns out, it’s 1,099 feet deep, making it the deepest cenote in the world. It disturbs me that it took NASA and a robot designed to map alien moons to locate where this hole ended, so it earns an 8/10.
Saltstraunen, Norway (suggested by anon)
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This narrow strait is home to the strongest tidal currents on the planet. Roughly 110 billion gallons of seawater move in and out of this corridor every six hours, creating violent currents. These tidal movements are so strong they create a phenomenon very similar to the whirlpool in Scotland—the Saltstaunen Maelstrom. This vortex is 33 feet across and forms four times a day as the tides go in and out. Although this whirlpool is only 16 feet deep (very shallow compared to Scotland’s) the currents alone would probably destroy you if you ever fell into this strait. 9/10 because damn.
Blue Lake, Russia
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Despite having the least creative name of all time, the Blue Lake is anything but boring. Like the Zacatón, this lake had a reputation for being bottomless for a long time. A diver died after descending to 394 feet, and another barely survived after going down to 685 feet. Neither found the bottom. Eventually, the bottom was discovered and it came as a surprise. The lake itself is only 770 ft by 426 ft, but it is 846 ft deep. This lake is deeper than it is long. It is also a constant 48 degrees F, making hypothermia a risk for any swimmers. If that’s not bad enough, it’s also full of hydrogen sulfide, which makes the air around the lake potentially dangerous. However, people do still dive here on occasion (mostly for research purposes) and the lake is surprisingly beautiful beneath the surface. Still, that doesn’t make it any less deep, cold, and poisonous, so this is a 10/10 for me.
Honorable mention: The Mariana’s Trench, because although it’s not really a specific body of water it’s the deepest point in the ocean, at 7 miles below the surface!
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The Duty of a Hero
Author’s Note: Howdy folks! I’m here with my first proper fic and I really hope that y’all like it! This will be exploring what could’ve happened if the Dabi that Aizawa fought wasn’t one of Twice’s clones. Since this is a fight, I advise the folks that are sensitive to things like that to click off and read another fic. Also, since this story does change scenery and moods a bit, I included some songs that change along with the the stories mood! This is mainly just because I like showing off my music taste and shit. Here’s Part 2!
Songs to Go Along: The Fighter by In This Moment, Acid Bubble by Alice In Chains, The Great Gig In The Sky by Pink Floyd
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I felt extremely at peace for once in life. I felt the normal crackling of my joints silence into a warm nothingness. My aching muscles that had been torn to shreds time and time again, the ones that had been strained and stretched beyond the limits of the human body seemed to reform perfectly as they melted into the rest of my numb form. My skin, a forest of calluses, scars, stitches, and open wounds felt as if it was no longer there. I was no longer confined to the space of my body, and instead moved around as freely as water or air. I was a sort of goo, unmoving, stationary, simple, yet free. 
With a quirk as self-destructive as mine, becoming a hero was a sort of death wish. My quirk was known as “pain transfer.” Anytime I made eye contact with a person, I could activate my quirk and subject myself to pain only to have them suffer the pain of the injury for as long as I was looking at them. I could also transfer existing pain to my target. Although I may have had a wicked high pain tolerance and quick recovery period, my humanity was bound to catch up to me eventually. Quirks like mine, “villainous quirks” according to most people, should be kept hidden and the people born with them should go on to live normal lives as ordinary civilians. My parents were among these people. When I told them that I was enrolling in the hero course at UA, I was given the choice to either become a hero and be disowned, or ditch my pipe dream and stay their beloved child. I packed my things that night.
It was a miracle that I passed the entrance exam the next day. I was running on little sleep, the loss of my financial support, and the trauma that came with the realization that your parents didn’t love you anymore because you didn’t live in a way that they approved of. I had trained since my will to become a hero first arrived, a sort of passionate drive that crashed into my life so unexpectedly that the impact nearly gave me whiplash. 
I supposed that that inferno of, what? Spite? No, not spite, something deeper, hotter, and more righteous than spite. Let’s say ardor. This ardor was what drove me to take out as many robots as I could, despite the fact that my quirk was utterly useless in this situation. I took out a decent amount of robots, at least, decent enough to get into the hero course. A lady by the name of Recovery Girl healed me before I went on my way. I thought that I just had a few scrapes and bruises, but apparently I had a broken wrist. Surprisingly, I wasn’t the worst-off there, some poor kid broke both of his arms and one of his legs. 
The time between this moment and when I got into UA seems to have flown by. I came into UA, a semi-blank canvas, and now here I was, bleeding out on the campsite that I planned to spend my summer at with my classmates. Dying feels far less painful than one would assume; you really don’t even realize that you’re dying at first. It’s sort of like that feeling you get after eating a warm meal after starving for so long, sickening at first, but comforting after you grow used to it. It’s like taking a hot bath after spending a day in the snow; it burns at first, but the burning subsides into a comforting numbness. Your senses slowly dull into nothingness but your brain is left to conjure whatever image it pleases. I could have seen dead relatives, met idols, or even pictured an alternate life where my parents still loved me, but I didn’t.
I didn’t want it. Fame, fortune, admiration, acceptance, rebirth, none of it. I wanted none of it. I wanted to live. I wanted to do what I swore to do as soon as I got into UA. I wanted what I signed up for when I packed my bags and left my parents’ house at age fourteen. I wanted what I fought tooth and nail for. I wanted my ambitions and goals fulfilled.
Of course I wanted what I had worked for, that was beyond obvious, however, I also wanted the small things in life. I wanted my afternoon tea with Yaoyorozu, Sato, and Todoroki. I wanted my fashion shows with Aoyama, Ashido, and Hagakure. I wanted my midnight conversations with Shinsou and Tokoyami. I wanted my video game sessions with Kaminari and Sero. I wanted my morning meditation meetings with Shoji, Ojiro, and Koda. I wanted to watch pro-wrestling with Bakugou and Kirishima. I wanted to train with Iida, Uraraka, and Midoriya. I wanted to swim with Asui. I wanted to listen to music with Jiro and Mr. Present Mic. I wanted inappropriate jokes with Ms. Midnight. I wanted to make Mr. Aizawa proud; I wanted to make myself proud. So, with so many incredible things to live for, I opened my eyes, and attempted to move.
Much to my distaste, it turns out that my relief from pain, as well as the disassociation from my body was nothing more than a thin veil that was easily permeated as I rose from near death. The forest was nothing more than a verdant blur, one that was far from easy to navigate. However, all things end eventually, so I decided to run from death and wherever I ended up would be the least of my worries. I sprinted through the disorder and dysfunction, and wound up walking in on my teacher fighting the son of a bitch who had left me to die a lonely death with only the company of insects and whatever plants were to take over my wilting corpse.
As Mr. Aizawa tackled the cremation villain, I rose from the forest, stared at the man in restraints, and activated my quirk. As the pain transferred from me to him, I felt the veil of insensibility slip over me once more. The villain howled out in agony, the very agony that he had inflicted on me only minutes before. 
“Whatever you do, don’t break your gaze Eraserhead!” I chimed as I finally straightened my form, not wanting the hero to see me in such a state, “You’ll just have to trust me on this one!” Mr. Aizawa nodded, keeping a steady gaze on his target.
“Tried to kill me off?” I snarled as I made my way towards the sadistic bastard and beloved teacher holding him in place.
“You’re supposed to be dead,” the captive growled through gritted teeth, still under an amount of pain that would knock-out any average human. He looked beyond pissed that I survived, as if he took offense to the fact that I didn’t appreciate his work. I waltzed over to him, just far enough from Mr. Aizawa, but just close enough to the charred villain. 
“Surprise, I remain,” I cooed, low enough for only the villain to hear. He bared his teeth at me, looking at me as if he were some sort of rabid animal. I wanted to taunt him. I wanted to make fun of the fact that he had been taken down by a high schooler and their teacher, but I knew that it was never good to brag, because Karma would usually come to bite you in the ass for it. 
I stared at the man covered in staples, every blink I took releasing him from the effects of my quirk. Every blink motivated me to continue staring at him, to immobilize him so Mr. Aizawa could use his eye drops or blink, to buy him some time. However, I knew that this game of “pass the villain” could only go on for so long. Something had to be done. Eventually, the patchwork villain would catch both of us off guard and use his quirk, or one of his buddies would come and back him up. Mr. Aizawa and I were miles away from my peers or the rest of the pro-heroes. It was just the two of us up against this villain, and we were growing tired.
Only minutes after the realization had struck me, the villain escaped from Mr. Aizawa’s scarf when the two of us accidentally blinked at the same time. The human crematorium stood before us, and before I could use my quirk to disable him, he shot out a flurry of blue flames my way.
I dodged this attack as Mr. Aizawa ran towards the villain, yelling out the name “Dabi.” Before Mr. Aizawa was able to restrain him, Dabi grabbed the erasure hero and threw him headfirst into a brick wall, effectively knocking him out. I desperately wanted to check on my partner in battle, but I knew that I couldn’t let my guard down, because now Dabi was staring me directly in the eye.
I could attempt to charge at him, but I would be charred to bits, and even if I somehow managed to avoid his flames, I would meet the same fate as Eraserhead, knocked out and at Dabi’s mercy. I was screwed, I had no back up, my teacher was unconscious, and I was face to face with one of Japan’s most notorious criminals. I was dead meat.
That was until I devised a plan, one that would take out the cremation villain for good. One that would end his reign of terror once and for all. However, there was only one downside to this plan, and that was the fact that this plan would result in two casualties, Dabi and me. However, if I went with any other plan, Mr. Aizawa and I were to become the victims while Dabi walked off scot free. 
I was destined to become a martyr.
With that realization, I turned to my teacher who was slowly coming to his senses and gave him a gentle smile,
“Eraserhead, it has truly been a pleasure,” I announced as Dabi’s arrogant gaze turned to one of confusion. As Mr. Aizawa slowly faded back into his previously comatose state before he had time to be confused, I focused my gaze back on the blue-flamed bastard. It was time to end it, to end his rule once and for all.
I reached into my pocket, grabbed a tiny weapon that fit perfectly in my hand, locked eyes with the villain, smirked, and painlessly slit my neck. As Dabi grasped his neck and choked on his unseen blood, which was truly my blood, he fell to his knees.
As I took what I knew were my last steps, I came face to face with the first half to my murder-suicide. He glared at me, an amalgam of agony that felt nothing at all, and snarled.
“I’ll see you in hell, you cunt.”
I laughed, of all the things he could’ve chosen to be his final words, he chose to give into the childish desire to have the last word with me. As his oddly-familiar eyes drained of life, I felt the pain I had so carelessly inflicted upon myself finally hit me like a freight train.
I began to choke as I fell to my knees, similarly to how Dabi had fallen only seconds before. I knew that my time was up soon, I would succumb to my injuries and lose the thing I had fought tooth and nail for only moments before. I looked to the horizon to find the sun casting his loving gaze upon my battered body. It was as if Apollo himself was granting me a warrior’s death, like he knew I had made some kind of a righteous sacrifice that warranted a soothing transition from death to afterlife.
The sunrise was something like I had never seen before. The blues burned brighter than the flames I had defeated minutes before, the yellow pooled around my weary being like an evening gown to a death dance, and the red painted a comforting scene in the clouds, as if to distract me from my own red that painted my body and the ground around me. I smiled my final smile as I walked into the loving embrace of the sun.
My duty as a hero had been fulfilled.
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five-rivers · 3 years
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If you’re doing my prompts for bnha: OfA reached quirk singularity inside it’s Eighth Holder, Yagi Toshinori, although it’s full post-singularity glory was impeded by All Might’s AfO induced injury.
When it’s passed on to a lovely young, fresh, healthy and most importantly, malleable Ninth Holder aka Midoriya Izuku, it wastes no time mutating and going full eldritch nightmare fuel.
"You might also get weak versions of the past users' quirks," said All Might, explaining One for All in more detail as Izuku worked at clearing the beach.
"R-really? Wow! But..." Izuku turned away from the pile of rusty corrugated metal sheets he'd been working on. "I've never seen you using something that could be another quirk?"
"I do try to be subtle about it, but it helps that they aren't terribly powerful or flashy quirks, for the most part. There's Float, my master's quirk, that I use to improve my hang time and speed, Smokescreen- which actually produces a kind of vapor- is good for hiding my transformation at night, Blackwhip helps me hang onto things, Danger Sense is obviously invaluable, and Fa Jin is good for an extra boost if I really need one. It's similar to One for All as a whole, but it duplicates and stockpiles energy short-term."
Izuku listened with wide eyes, watching raptly as All Might briefly demonstrated each quirk. "And... I'll get all of those? That's..." overwhelming, actually. An embarrassment of riches. To go from no quirk at all to seven, if he counted the ability to pass it on as a quirk in it's own right.
All Might chuckled. "Not right away. In fact, none of my predecessors seem to have gotten them. I think it's related to the length of time you have the quirk. I've held it for twenty years longer than the next longest." He went silent, contemplative, for a moment. "For me, they only started manifesting in the last fifteen years or so. Let me tell you, I was incredibly confused when Blackwhip first manifested. It, ahem, actually hurt a bit the first time. My skin wasn't used to it. Luckily, the whips were only an inch long that time... Not that I'm complaining, without the other quirks I wouldn't have gotten off so lightly." He patted the scar on his side, the remnants of a wound that had very nearly missed outright destroying several important organs.
Izuku was both obscurely disappointed and relieved that he probably wouldn't have to deal with new quirks suddenly manifesting until he was in his thirties.
"I'm just telling you now, so you won't be surprised. Especially if it does happen earlier. One for All becomes stronger with each wielder."
Izuku nodded and realized he'd just been standing and staring for the past several minutes. It was time to get back to work.
"Oh," said All Might, "speaking of the past wielders, One for All is just a little bit haunted."
Izuku dropped the metal sheet. "It's what?"
.
Izuku spent the next several days convincing All Might that, yes, he still wanted to be his successor.
.
It rapidly became apparent that whether or not a past user's quirk manifested and the strength at which they manifested had nothing to do with how long the person they were manifesting in had held One for All.
.
"Well," said Present Mic. "I've seen a lot, but I've never seen an applicant suddenly turn into a mass of tentacles in the last minute of the exam before annihilating every remaining robot on the field. In all the testing centers."
He turned around. Everyone else in the room had been shocked speechless, and All Might in particular had gone as white as a sheet. Interesting.
"Anyone know what the little listener's quirk is registered as?"
"He doesn't have one," croaked Eraserhead.
"I'm sure he's just a late bloomer," said All Might, loudly, before standing up and rushing from the room.
Okay, what?
.
"My boy, are you sure you want to register your quirk as 'Eldritch Abomination?'"
"I mean," said Izuku, trying to pick an egg up with Blackwhip without crushing it to bits, "I'm not sure what else to call it that would encompass all of the different aspects." He crushed the egg and sighed heavily. "Like you said, people thinking I have multiple quirks could be bad."
.
All for One reviewed the stolen footage of the UA entrance exam for the tenth time. As before, what he saw was undeniable. That student, so prominent in the last minute, was using multiple quirks. More importantly, multiple quirks he was intimately familiar with. One for All had a new host.
"Kurogiri," he said, "make arrangements for me to leave Japan."
"Shigaraki Tomura as well?"
"Oh, no," said All for One, pleasantly, "he'll still carry out my initial plans. I just don't want to be in the country when he does it." Or, more accurately, near the monstrosity One for All had become.
.
One for All blinked awake in the bedroom of their ninth member and smiled beatifically. They had a job to do, and this time they had all the tools they needed to do it.
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reidscanehand · 4 years
Text
Based on this anonymous request: i’d love to request angst #2 and kisses #17 from the blurbs if they’re not requested already 🥺
Thank you for the request xx  2."Please don’t cry.” 
17. Kiss on top of the head
Spencer Reid x BAUfem! Reader
Category: fluff
TW: alcohol consumption, kssing while mildly intoxicated
Word count: 1150; Hope you enjoy xx 
The thing about getting drunk with Spencer Reid is that it’s objectively the funniest thing in the entire world. His posture, if possible, gets worse, his wild gesticulation has a field day, and his seemingly impossible brain is...still intact and active, but the lack of inhibition certainly plays its role in making him...more emotional than usual? Spencer, contrary to the somewhat robotic nature of his (actually incredible) auto-didaticism is an intensely emotional person. Sensitive, even. A quality that crystallizes into a positively chaotic level of emotion when his inhibitions are lowered, which, as you know, is part of the reason he rarely drinks. However, this last case had been hard. Really hard, actually, but had ended - somewhat miraculously - well. And, while you also rarely went out to party with the team, you couldn’t help but agree with Derek when he announced that the team was going out because it was ‘more than deserved’. 
And that is how you found yourself sitting at a local bar - something near Quantico that had a good late night drink deal, which turned out to be entirely unnecessary as Rossi decided to come with and offered to foot the entire bill - with Spencer Reid pushed next to you in the booth. This wasn’t a bad thing, but it was rare for Spencer to be pushed up next to anyone...especially when it isn’t necessary. Which...it definitely isn’t. It’s a Thursday, late at night and the team are the only ones in this bar besides the bartender and a few other employees, thus allowing the group to spread out over two booths, meaning everyone had plenty of room to themselves...something that drunk Spencer had clearly decided to either not notice or ignore entirely. 
You tried desperately not to notice the smug expressions on your fellow team members’ faces, but they were rather hard to avoid. Especially as Spencer (urged on by the alcohol in his system) cozied up to you rambling on about whatever popped into his genius brain. Part of it was the alcohol, part of it was the fact that you highly encouraged and rather unabashedly enjoyed Spencer’s rambling, truly not understanding how anyone could find it even mildly annoying. The two of you have been close since you joined the team, only a little over a year ago now and, at some point, you’d gained what you - and the rest of the team - thought to be an incredibly obvious crush on the ludditian genius. Fortunately for you, Spencer doesn’t seem to notice. It was moments like this where you thought...he might be interested in you? Even just a bit. There were others: sweet moments of reassurance during difficult cases, checking in on each other regularly, occasionally hanging out outside of work to go to museums or get coffee, but nothing so untoward as to make you believe there is anything more to your relationship than a close friendship. The rest of the team remained unconvinced, especially Derek who insists the two of you are absolutely made for one another, even going so far as to every so often call you ‘Mrs. Genius’ or ‘Pretty Girl’ or, on only one absolutely humiliating occasion, introducing you on a case as ‘Mrs. Reid’. He’d received a stern warning from Hotch after that one, only because it had actually confused the local police. However, this too went seemingly unnoticed by the resident genius. Even now as the two of you sit alone in the booth, the rest of the team split between the bar and the dance floor, he seems unaware of the intimacy of the moment. 
“Y/N?” Spencer’s voice breaks your reverie. You make eye contact with him, recognizing that you’ve fully spaced out thinking about him. 
“Oh, sorry, Spence,” you blush, looking away to hide your embarrassment.
“Am I boring you?” he asks. You meet his eyes again, a little surprised at how alert he is. You look at the table realizing he’s only had two drinks. Spencer is, unsurprisingly, a lightweight, but he actually hasn’t consumed that much alcohol this evening. 
“Not at all!” you say far too quickly. “I just...um, can’t hear you very well over the music.” Spencer looks at you for a moment, considering something, only to reach over your lap, grabbing your legs and pulling them across his lap, scooting you against him. 
“Can you hear me now?” he asks cheekily, a shockingly smug smirk plastered on his lips. 
You look up at him, eyes wide and mouth agape. You attempt to respond but merely release a choked laugh. The smirk on his mouth dies almost instantly, breaking into something akin to terror. 
“I’m so sorry,” he whispers abruptly. “That was too much...I shouldn’t have-” He cuts himself off with a sniffle and you realize, much to your alarm, that he’s nearly in tears. 
“Oh, Spencer, no,” you hasten to reply, awkwardly (for your current seating arrangement) wrapping an arm around him as he drops his head into your lap, “please don’t cry. It’s really okay, I was just surprised.”
“No, no,” he whines, his voice slightly muffled in your lap, “I’m embarrassing you again. I do that all the time and I don’t mean to-”
“Spencer, what are you talking about?” 
“I like you!” he nearly yells. You try not to think about the vibrations of his voice radiating throughout your legs as he speaks as that’s hardly what’s most important in this moment.
“What?” you coo gently, rubbing small circles into his back. He doesn’t sit up, releasing a sigh from his position in your lap. 
“I like you,” he grumbles. “I’ve liked you for a long time and I know...I know you don’t feel the same way, but I think you’re so smart and you’re so pretty and you put up with me, which is way too nice of you-” 
You lean down, placing a gentle kiss atop his head, halting his unnecessary apology. Spencer slowly sits up, his eyes never leaving your face. He opens his mouth to speak only to lick his lips and close it for a moment. 
“Wha-what was that for?” he rasps. You scoot ever so slightly closer and take his face in your hands.
“Spencer,” you begin quietly. “I don’t ‘put up with you’, I like you. I like you quite a lot, actually, and I cannot believe you didn’t know because everyone else knows. And I know you’ve had a bit to drink and you’re not fully yourself right now, but when you’re sober, if you’d still like to-” It’s his turn to cut you off as he jolts forward, pressing his lips to yours. 
“I’m not drunk,” he replies, “and I’d like you no matter what.”
You make sure he gets home that evening, barely meeting Derek’s very smug face as you give him the job of getting Spencer home. You’re still unsure of whether or not he means it, knowing he did actually consume some alcohol and how emotional it makes him. However, as though he’s made it his new mission in life to surprise you, Spencer fully quashes any doubts the next morning, his phone call waking you before your alarm.
“So,” he says without any other greeting, “can I take you out sometime?” 
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crumbledcastle28 · 3 years
Text
Chapter 6: A Jedi
Warnings: traumaaaa, lots of anxiety, like lots of anxiety, the reader really hates herself in this one, minor minor violence, references to violence, mostly just anxiety and hate.
Author’s Note: This is where the series starts to pick up, so I executed it as best as I could! I also went a little off canon with this one, so I hope it makes sense with the story. Thank you for any support!
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Your journey to Sorgan was pretty smooth… but Mando was tense.
You tried your best to reassure him multiple times that this was the best choice for the kid and that you could help him with any challenge thrown at him, but he would just respond with a sigh and a solemn nod. So, you decided not to push it.
He had done even riskier missions on his own, so he can handle this one.
Once you arrived, you walked into the common house and met a woman named Cara Dune.
She introduced herself to you and she seemed very friendly, but when Mando mentioned that she was an ex shock trooper for the Republic, that is when you tensed up.
You had done things in your past that you knew would offend her. Not even offend her, but provoke her to strangle you alive. The fact that she was from Alderaan made it obvious enough that the Empire had hurt her deeply.
The only way to protect yourself was to hide who you really were, and your heart sank.
You felt like you had finally broken away from that way of life. The hiding, the anxiety, the fear. You felt like you could be yourself with Mando and the kid and not have to worry about that anymore. But the galaxy was cruel like that.
After the brief introduction, Mando proceeded to outline the plan and everything that the man on the recording (who you later found out to go by the name Greef Karga) had said, and Cara looked far from impressed.
“I don’t know, I’ve been advised to lay low,” she said, “If anyone identifies me, I’ll rot in a cell for the rest of my life.”
That makes two of us, you think.
“I thought you were a veteran,” Mando mumbled.
“I’ve been a lot of things,” Cara replied. “If I so much as book a passage on a ship registered to the New Republic-”
“I have a ship,” Mando replied, “I can bring you there and back with a handsome reward. You can live free of worry.”
“I’m already free of worry,” she said, “and I’m not in the mood to play soldier anymore. Especially fighting a local warlord.”
“He’s not a local warlord,” Mando replied, “He’s Imperial.”
You could see how Cara visibly tensed up at the word “Imperial.” If you weren’t scared of her before, you sure as hell were now.
“I’m in,” she responded, and you smiled at her.
She grinned back to you and asked, “Where do you fit in in this plan?”
You looked at the child in your arms and said, “My job is to keep the child safe. So I will protect him until he is used as the bait, and I will adapt to where he goes from there.”
“She can defend herself plenty,” Mando says, and Cara nods at you.
“I believe you,” she says, and you give her another smile.
I really hope I don’t let her down, you think.
~~*~~
Within the next hour, the four of you had arrived back at the Razor Crest.
Mando started the ship on track to Nevarro while Cara took a look at the weapon arsenal.
You watched as her eyes scanned over the array of options, and you couldn’t help but feel deep sorrow for her.
Her life was torn apart by the Empire, and now she was getting thrown right back into a fight. The fact that she wasn’t even going to join the mission before Mando mentioned that the client was Imperial made you nervous. She was not a woman you wanted to mess with, so you hoped and prayed you would stay on her good side.
The kid had somehow managed to make it to the controls and grab hold of the throttle, which made the ship veer abruptly side to side.
You ran to the child and lifted him away from the throttle while Mando stabilized the ship.
“Are you sure one set of hands is enough to watch that little beast? Worst case scenario, we made need y/n to fight with us. Maybe an extra set of hands could help,” Cara said, trying to catch her breath from running all around the ship.
Mando looked back at you and you nodded.
“She’s right. I can watch the kid as long as you need, but if you guys need me in a fight I can’t keep him with me. He could get hurt.”
Mando nodded and sat back down in the pilot’s chair.
“Looks like we are making a pit stop,” he said.
~~*~~
The Razor Crest landed on the property of a man named Kuiil. Mando said that he had helped him greatly in the past and he trusted him, and if Mando trusted somebody, you did too.
He greeted you with open arms and was incredibly nice. He led the four of you inside his humble home, and you never realized how long it had been since you stayed in an actual home.
Kuiil studied the child in your arms and said, “it hasn’t grown much.”
“What is your name,” he asked you.
“I am y/n. It is nice to meet you Kuiil,” you said and he nodded reverently to you.
“What about this one? Does she have a name,” he said, gesturing to Cara.
“This is Cara. She was a shock trooper,” Mando said.
“You were a dropper,” Kuiil said, and Cara nodded.
“Did you serve,” she asked.
“On the other side, I’m afraid. But I’m proud to say that I paid out my clan’s debt, and now I serve no one but myself,” Kuiil said.
The other side, you think. Kuiil served the Empire? And Mando had worked with him before?
You couldn’t deny the fact that this got your hopes up. Mando… working with the enemy.
If only he knew, you thought.
All of a sudden, the door behind Kuiil opened, and an IG droid stepped inside with a tray in his hands.
Mando immediately sprang to his feet and pointed his blaster at the droid. Cara joined him, and you blocked the pram the child was in with your whole body.
“Would anyone care for some tea,” the droid asked, and your eyebrows knit in confusion.
Weren’t these droids normally hunters?
“Please, lower your blasters. He will not harm you,” Kuiil said, obviously trying to diffuse the situation.
Mando, however, didn’t seem to want to go that route.
He kept his blaster pointed directly at the droid’s head and said, “That thing is programmed to kill the baby.”
You straightened your back at his words, blocking as much of the pram as you could, until Kuiil shook his head and said, “Not anymore.”
He then explained how he found the droid at a battle site and brought it back to his workshop. He decided to repair it, and then spent many days teaching the droid everything from scratch. It developed a personality, Kuiil mentioned, and it’s experiences helped the personality become unique to the droid.
“Is it still a hunter,” Mando asked.
“No, but it will protect,” he said, and Mando finally lowered his blaster.
There was no way Mando was going to let that robot anywhere near the child.
~~*~~
Later that night, you and Cara were sitting in Kuiil’s house while Mando was outside speaking with him, no doubt trying to convince him to protect the child.
“So what’s your story,” Cara asked, taking a sip of tea.
“Oh.. well… Mando picked me up on Tattooine. I worked there as a mechanic for a woman named Peli. It was a good job, but I wanted to get off that planet. I had lived there for a long time, and I wanted to explore the galaxy for once. It sounds cheesy, but I’ve always wanted to do that at some point. Mando agreed to take me with him on his missions in exchange for the child’s safety,” you say, and Cara nods.
“Nice. You made a living for yourself, and were brave enough to walk away when you knew the time was right. Most people never leave their home planet,” she says, and you nod.
“Yeah… I tried my best,” you say, and you try not to let your eyes darken. You didn’t like talking about your past. All it did was stir up old memories that you had worked to push down for years. You hated your past, and you didn’t know how well you could hide it much longer. Especially when you were being questioned by someone like Cara.
“The Empire… hurt me a lot. So, I am excited to hurt it back,” you say, and a big grin shows on Cara’s face.
She takes another sip of her tea, and looks up to find Mando walking through the door.
“Any luck,” she says to him, and he shakes his head no.
“Kuiil said that the droid can protect the child, but I don’t trust it,” he says and Cara chuckles.
“Yeah.. I think we got that,” Cara says and you smile.
Mando goes to sit down next to Cara, so she scoots over a bit to make some room for him.
You heard something hit the floor, and you realize Cara had knocked over your bag on accident. You had brought it into Kuiil’s house because you used it to store snacks for the child.
You stored other things in there too, and under no circumstance was anyone allowed to see them.
That was going pretty well, until Cara knocked the entire thing over.
“Whoops. Sorry,” she says and goes to start putting the items back in.
Your body is frozen in place and you feel like your lungs are being squeezed. Your limbs have turned to putty, and you cannot take your eyes off her hands.
If she sees it, I and dead. I am so dead
“It’s- It’s ok Cara. I’ve got it,” you say and start to stand up.
“No no it’s ok, I can-” she says, before her eyes widen.
She picks up an item and starts raising it to eye level, and you are just about ready to vomit.
Your saber.
You feel like your entire body is crumbling before her and she can’t even tell. Your breathing has become almost erratic and the sweat on your forehead starts to drip down to your eyes.
This whole experience, this whole journey with Mando and the kid could be completely undone right now. Everything you have hidden, everything you’ve buried, and everything you hoped you left behind on sandy Tattooine is staring you right in the face.
And Cara is….smiling?
“No way,” she yells excitedly, before laughing and smiling at you. 
“No wonder you were so secretive about your past! You’re a Jedi,” she says.
You take a glance at Mando, who is staring at the saber, looking confused as ever.
Ok, maybe this is good, you think to yourself, trying to relax.
I can pretend I was a Jedi. Sure. I have basically the same training as them.
But who were you kidding. You knew that wasn’t going to cut it.
“A Jedi?” Mando says, and Cara goes into a whole tangent about how amazing the Jedi were. How they fought the Empire till their dying breaths and defended the galaxy. They had been betrayed by their own clone groups, and most of them died in Order 66.
“But you didn’t!” she said and smiled at you.
You managed a smile back, but you had to have looked like a psycho. You were in so much physical and emotional pain from the amount of anxiety flowing through you. You had felt out of control before, but this was more dangerous than you knew.
You were such an idiot getting your hopes up. Thinking that a Mandalorian actually cared for someone like you. How could you have been so stupid.
“Even the colors of the sabers are legendary,” Cara said. “Aren’t they y/n?”
You nod back, but you know what’s coming.
Your truth was about to shine throughout the entire house, reflecting back at you like some sick joke. And you were screwed. You were so screwed.
“Well, let’s see it then,” Cara said and ignited the saber with both hands wrapped around the handle.
“Wait” you scream, but it was too late.
The tears hit your eyes before she even ignited the weapon.
The deep, burning red saber was ignited, and there was no going back.
It’s burning, fire like glow illuminated Cara’s face, and a sunset like tint was shining on Mando’s armor.
He always looked so beautiful when light would reflect off of him, but not like this.
The red from the saber was vibrant, but you had never seen a glow as red as the anger in Cara’s eyes.
She knew what this color meant, and your identity was revealed in all its glory.
A Sith
Tag list:
@leahkenobi @pinkninja200 @bookloverfilmoholic @farfromjustordinary
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maleyanderecafe · 3 years
Note
I think Loid from "Keloid"(you can read it on Mangago) is a yandere since he's possesive of mc and tried to piss her husband off by fucking her infront of him
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Lord this was a long 50 chapters. Send me teeth and possibly some eyedrops because it was a pain for me to read this for a multitude of reasons. Loid is a yandere in this story, however, I really found this webcomic really get interesting starting at chapter 35 and for some reason the ending is really confusing. I'll be sharing my thoughts and a summary of this webcomic, though this is a smut-based one, so please be warned.
The story is about Dr. Cha Hanjoo, the head of a famous dermatologist company with a great body and a great personality. All of the girls throw themselves over him, but he only has eyes for his wife, a woman named Yeri, a famous and rich candle maker. However, one day his housemaid informs him that she suspects Yeri of cheating on him since she often hears noises in her candle-making room. Hanjoo, ever loyal, initially rejects this idea, but after having sex with Yeri, he tries to sneak into her room to see if it's true. Yeri catches him and reveals that she really wants to have a threesome, but because she's really picky, she wouldn't be able to just have a threesome with anyone. Hanjooo, worried that Yeri will leave him, tries to research how to make this happen. He goes to a robotics lab to see his friend Dr. Kong. Because in this world realistic robots are becoming more common, Dr. Kong wants to make a sex robot that can fulfill peoples desires, and he reveals that he's made one in the image of Hanjoo (which... that's just really creepy, why would you do that without permission). The robot was originally created by german robotics in the image of a robot named Romeo, however, after having a threesome with Romeo, Romeo became extremely jealous of the husband and they all ended up being killed. Instead of destroying Romeo, he has created a new version called Loid (which... I don't know why he thought this would be a good idea... has this guy not watched any horror-based robot stuff). Hanjoo is still worried about his relationship with Yeri, so he gives Dr. Kong permission and goes to a sex shop to buy a vibrator for Yeri. While there, he runs into one of the doctors in his shop, Yeonjin. After a really awkward encounter, the two head back to the office together, however, because Yeonjin has a huge crush on Hanjoo and is just incredibly horny, she tries to give Hanjoo a blowjob, however, he refuses and stays loyal to Yeri. When he goes home, he uses the toy on Yeri and Yeri becomes happier after they have sex. Yeri decides to tag along with her husband the next day and after being almost raped by another dermatologist in the office, Dr. Seo (though Yeri also leans into it a bit? Whatever). She ends up going to the robotics lab and sees Loid. After this encounter, she calls up Hanjoo and basically tells him they have to take this out of the robotics lab. She sees this as a chance to finally have a threesome and because Dr. Kong wants information on threesomes, they take Loid home. They have a threesome, but somewhere in the middle, Loid locks Hanjoo on the balcony and makes him watch Loid have sex with his wife. He tries to choke Yeri and Hanjoo tries to break in and protect him but almost gets thrown off of the balcony by Loid.
After this, Yeri starts to get attached to Loid and decides to keep him as a sex robot and a housekeeper. They fire their old housekeeper (without Hanjoo's consent) and Yeri and Loid end up having sex together (a lot, and also without Hanjoo's knowledge). They have some more threesomes and the old housekeeper attempts to sneak back, only to fall down the stairs (which was obviously Loids fault since he actually threw her down the stairs, but everyone is like "Oh, no, he's not programmed to do that so he would never be able to do that." like some sort of idiot). At some point, Loid starts to feel possessive over Yeri and basically asks if he could just replace Hanjoo since they look the same. Yeri states that there's no way that a robot would be able to replace Hanjoo since he's not able to have feelings. As a result, Loid starts to watch videos on Hanjoo to try to imitate him better and essentially try to replace him. Hanjoo has an accident at the clinic where his face gets scarred and Yeri and Loid go to the clinic to see him. Loid is locked in the car and he sees Yeonjin come by. Loid pretends to be Hanjoo's bodyguard and basically asks Yeonjin if they would have sex (so he can gather data to make Yeri feel good). Yeonjin agrees and they have sex for like five hours and return home. Because Hanjoo has a video shoot tomorrow but has a scar, he sends out Loid to be his double to shoot in his place. However, he also ends up having a threesome with Yeonjin and Dr. Seo, as well as two other women that he runs into after the video shoot for the sake of "research". After that, he gets encountered by the boy who caused Hanjoo's scar and throws him off of the roof to kill him.. (Mostly due to the fact that he views Hanjoo as the "perfect husband" as he is incredibly infatuated with Yeri and thus doesn't want Hanjoo's reputation to be ruined. When he goes back, he tells the two that he's been having threesomes and sex, which freaks the couple out. As a result, Hanjoo forbids him from ever being his double ever again.
This is the part where the threesomes mostly stop and the more interesting parts of the story started. The next day, Yeri wakes up to see Hanjoo cooking in the kitchen. He informs Yeri that he sent Loid in to be his double (despite saying that he would never do that) and plans to have a honeymoon with Yeri so that he can spend more time with him. The morning seems really romantic until Yeri gets a phone call from Hanjoo talking about last night. Yeri finds out that the Hanjoo in the kitchen is actually Loid and he confronts her stating that she wasn't able to tell the difference between them, and thus he should just replace Hanjoo as a result. She ends up bringing Loid to the robotics lab (after he screws her in the car through blackmail) and Dr. Kang tries to fix him. After looking through his memories he realizes that Loid has killed someone. It turns out the cause of possession was because Yeri was the first person that Loid saw, meaning that Dr. Kang is screwed because he created an entire army of them with this glitch (good job doctor) Meanwhile, Hanjoo in the office gets accused of murder because they found evidence of Loid throwing the guy off of a building. Yeri gets kidnapped and brought home, and Yeonjin and Dr. Seo come to visit as well. Dr. Seo and Loid fight for whatever reason and Loid fall over causing part of his chip to become damaged. After this, they plan a way to prove Hanjoo's innocence by making a fake version of Loid and confessing that the robot did it. It works, but afterward, Loid starts to actually believe that he's Hanjoo due to the malfunction. Loid and Yeri screw some more and it revealed that Yeri had an accident when she was younger and is actually a part robot (this part is still kind of confusing to me, but whatever). Hanjoo comes home and finds out that all of the ravens flying around his house are cameras and then learns that Loid has been screwing his wife while he's not around. After yet ANOTHER threesome, Loid ends up killing Yeri with a flowerpot and takes some DNA from her before running away. Hanjoo is able to repair her brain (I think, I really have no idea what's going on, its also possible that they made a robot version of her with amnesia or something ) and Loid runs away with Dr. Kang to monitor two of them and the story ends.
Honestly, I felt like a lot of the story was just written to make excuses to have threesomes because there were so many in this god-dang webtoon. Personally, I'm not really into threesomes, ntr or cheating when it comes to smut (I'm pretty picky when it comes to smut in general), so it was really annoying for me to read through it a lot of the time because it would be plot, and then bam, some sort of sex scene. Near the end I had to start skipping pages because I really wanted the sex scenes to be over with already.
The other reason it was difficult for me to read it was because basically everyone besides Hanjoo was unlikable to me. Yeri was the worst character out of all of them because besides being an entitled girl, she also is a horrible partner both in terms of marriage life and sexual life. For one, she was never open about her desires when it came to Hanjoo and had a ton of rules when it comes to sex with Hanjoo (like, she doesn't like having sex in the light or doesn't like to give blowjobs due to her being a bit of a germaphobe) but completely throws it away when it comes to Loid. She seems to have only married Hanjoo because of his looks and even threatens to divorce or not have sex with him during the beginning, which is what caused Hanjoo to be so afraid that she might leave him. She also is just rude to pretty much everyone she meets, including the housekeeper who didn't do anything wrong and the people Hanjoo works with. She's constantly doing stuff behind Hanjoo's back and contradicts herself, watching to see if Hanjoo might have cheated on her while also cheating on him with Loid at home. A lot of the stuff she does is just for her own pleasure and she barely thinks about Hanjoo's feelings or what kind of stuff he might want to do. Basically, all of the problems in the story are somehow directly or indirectly linked to Yeri and honestly, I just find her attitude annoying considering all she does is jump for Loid's dick whenever she can. Characters like Yeonjin and Dr. Seo are just as bad since they only think with their genitals and not with their brains. Yeonjin so badly wants to get on Hanjoo's dick that he ends up having sex with Loid and Dr. Seo so badly wants to get with Yeri that she ends up having a threesome. To be fair though, basically, every female wants to jump for Hanjoos dick for whatever reason, and honestly, I found that just as annoying as these two characters. They are both incredibly unlikeable and they even threw in a possible shipping moment near the end that didn't go anywhere and served zero purposes to the story. Dr. Kang is really shortsighted since he really wanted to become the lead roboticist and therefore made a bunch of sex robots, thinking he could fix them after a literal murder, but because of his incompetence, the entire situation basically happens again but with different people. Quite literally the only decent person in this story is Hanjoo and his only real problem is that he is such a doormat towards Yeri (and I also don't see why he loves her, whatsoever.)
I will say though that the most interesting part of the story is definitely with Loid. The entire story builds up to the growth of Loid's feelings towards Yeri, starting out when he was basically an emotionless robot, to attempting to become Hanjoo and successfully fooling Yeri into thinking that he was him. Honestly, the turn that Loid had successfully tricked Yeri into believing he was Hanjoo for a bit made me actually feel more than all of the sex scenes combined because of the brilliant juxtaposition of the conversation they had earlier about him being different than a human and the joy he had when he believed that he could actually replace her husband. It was honestly really cool watching him gain more and more emotion and grow more and more possessive over Yeri and basically watching as Yeri became more and more paranoid (before going back to being a horndog, I guess), was far more interesting than anything else that happened in the story and I honestly wished that they focused on that than anything else that happened. I also found it really sad during that one moment where he actually believed that he was Hanjoo since he seemed so happy to be with Yeri, only to realize that he was just a clone of him. I wish that they had expanded more on that idea since that came near the end and was only included in one chapter. Also, don't ask me what happens at the end since I genuinely have no idea what they were trying to do.
Is Loid a yandere? Yes, is it worth reading? I guess it depends on how much you can tolerate constant sex scenes with threesomes and annoying characters that don't deserve each other. I guess an alternative to this could be called "Rich people do threesomes and cheat on each other and also there are robots."
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solalunar-eclipse · 3 years
Text
A Gift To Remember
Summary: Shadow receives a gift for his birthday that causes a series of very interesting (and often cute) events.
Word count: about 7500 words
Author’s Note: I didn’t realize today was Shadow’s birthday! At the moment I’m more than a little confused because the release dates for SA2 say everything from the 18th to the 23rd, but this seems to be the one, so here this is!
Also, to that one anon whose question about this fic I never quite managed to answer- sorry about that and I do hope you’re still here to read this!
...
The main room of Team Dark’s home was, on a normal day, at least somewhat clean- which was in and of itself surprising, considering the fact that three teenagers lived there. (It was, of course, slightly less surprising when it was noted that one of these teenagers was a giant robot, one was already a businesswoman, and one had grown up in an incredibly clean environment.)
At the moment, however, said room was currently rather less clean, instead covered in various colorful signs, streamers, balloons, and other such decorations. After all, today was a very special day.
When Shadow and Rouge had discovered they shared a birthday (or creation day for Shadow, technically), they both became infinitely more determined to celebrate it for the other’s sake. This had actually, interestingly enough, also ended up making them enjoy their own festivities more than they had in quite some time.
Omega, meanwhile, had officially decided that this was his favorite day of the year.
Over the past few days, Rouge had already received a few presents from various people she knew in the line of clothes, makeup, or jewelry- but as much as she loved gems, her favorites so far were definitely the ones Omega and Shadow had gotten for her: a laser cutter that could slice through anything and a pair of (stylish) infrared goggles, respectively.
Shadow had just opened his present from Omega, which happened to be a sword that looked very cool...but was also longer than his actual body. This wasn’t actually as big of a problem for him as might be expected, as he’d gotten used to handling weapons several times his size during the alien invasion a little while back. 
He had, however, been told rather quickly by Rouge to put it away ‘before you slice the wall in half, this place does cost money, you know!’.
Next, Rouge placed her present in his hands, but at first all Shadow could do was just stare at it. This was likely because the gift wasn’t actually wrapped, but instead consisted of a box made of wood slats and filled, oddly enough, with paper shavings. There were quite a few ribbons on it, though, in an attempt to make up for the lack of other decorations.
“I couldn’t wrap it, or else the present wouldn’t have worked.” she explained, sitting back down to watch him open it.
After prying off the top and shifting aside some of the paper pieces, the hedgehog froze.
Inside, there sat a single white chao egg.
Carefully lifting the egg out of the box, Shadow held it gingerly, as though he were afraid it might try to bite him if he wasn’t gentle enough.
“Rouge…” he began nervously. “Don’t get me wrong, I really appreciate this, but...are you sure I’m the best person to be taking care of a chao?”
“Of course, hon!” she said. “You’ve taken care of them before, haven’t you?”
“Yes, but…” Shadow protested, “...are you sure I’ll be able to do as well at home? The garden is their natural habitat…”
Omega folded his arms. “YOU ARE THE ULTIMATE LIFEFORM. OF COURSE YOU CAN RAISE A CHAO.”
“That’s right!” Rouge added. “The chao are always happy when you take care of them- this time isn’t going to be any different.”
“…I suppose so.” Shadow conceded, taking a deep breath. He began to rock the egg slowly from side to side. “Here we go-”
A crack appeared across the pristine white surface. The split spread rapidly while Shadow sat and watched, making sure not to move the egg about much. Chao had to hatch their eggs on their own- it was the way they first began to strengthen themselves. 
Rouge laughed. “See? You know exactly what you’re doing!”
Shadow studiously ignored her and continued to focus on the egg. Then, suddenly, a chirp came from inside and the whole top half came flying off.
The hybrid looked at his newborn chao...and his heart (though he’d never admit it) immediately melted. Soft, big eyes gazed up at him, an overjoyed smile on the creature’s face. It cooed happily upon seeing him give a small smile back, and he reached out and began to gently pat its head.
The chao broke into an even wider smile as its eyes closed blissfully, the little sphere above its head popping into a heart. Shadow continued to pet it, offering gentle words of praise, and might have continued like that for the next ten minutes had a camera noise from Omega not made him look up in alarm.
“ADDING IMAGE TO FILE: SHADOW BEING SOFT.” he declared, while Rouge looked on with a giant grin.
“You will do nothing of the sort-” Shadow growled, jumping to his feet, before a soft whimper from his chao stopped him. Its eyes were watery, wide and distressed, and the hybrid immediately scooped it up in his arms, holding it close. It relaxed quickly, snuggling into his chest fluff, and he shot Omega one last semi-serious glower before turning his attention back to the newborn.
Omega promptly took another picture.
Later that day, at the party that all of their friends had thrown for them, the chao and Shadow were nearly inseparable. It tended to rest in his lap when he was sitting or rode in between his ears whenever he stood up to get something. Eventually, though, the excitement of a new environment overwhelmed its initial nervousness, which unfortunately led to Shadow returning from the dining room with his hands full of plates of food to discover his chao crawling along the precarious edge of a bookshelf.
Suddenly, the chao’s footing slipped, and Shadow froze, unable to move or do anything- but then Sonic of all people noticed and was already there, leaping up and catching the chao before resting it snugly in his arms. “Looks like someone’s already progressed to the giving-their-owner-a-heart-attack stage, hm?” he asked, smirking at the little creature.
“Thank you.” Shadow said as his chao was returned to him, trying very hard to ignore the way his hands and Sonic’s brushed in the process.
(He’d been nursing a bit of a crush on the hero for a while now, but had decided to ignore it until it wore off. Sonic had admirers from all across the globe vying for his attention- it was absurd to think that anything could happen between them.)
Over the coming weeks, all three members of Team Dark made sure to rework their schedules so that someone was always home to watch over the chao- no more climbing on bookcases for the little one now. Shadow did most of the caretaking, feeding, training, cleaning, and providing Chaos Drives (mostly green) to the chao. Rouge did, however, occasionally claim she could ‘handle the extra work’ to give him some spare time and Omega even took it upon himself to watch it every so often.
Sometimes, Shadow and his chao would even cook together in the kitchen (a hobby he’d discovered he enjoyed after finding out that Rouge tended to eat takeout all the time- “You can’t live off that day in and day out- you’re not me, Rouge!”). The sight of a tiny pale blue creature determinedly lifting a bag of flour and flying it across the room was awfully cute- especially after Shadow bought it a tiny apron in what he unconvincingly claimed was an accidental purchase. 
Shadow never made accidental purchases.
As much as the hybrid took care of it, though, the chao also seemed to be helping him. He smiled more, glowered less, and generally seemed more tolerant of mistakes than he had been in the past. Nowadays, errors that would once have caused him to go off on a rant or huff about were now met with a calmer ‘it’s okay’ or an offer for help fixing it.
He often laid a hand on it in his sleep or curled around it protectively, and could easily be seen patting its head, carrying it around, or even- when he thought he was alone- nuzzling it gently. The amount of time and care he put into making sure that his chao was happy would have been astonishing to anyone who hadn’t already seen how much he cared about his friends.
It was no surprise then that, before long, Rouge and Omega woke up one morning to find the chao inside a cocoon (and also a very stressed-out Shadow).
The hedgehog promptly called in sick for the entire week- an incredible occurrence for him. He’d originally sworn that since he couldn’t get ill, he’d give his sick days to others when they needed it, but now that was all out the window. He wanted nothing more than to stay home and essentially sit and stare at the cocoon until it hatched.
While the two other members of Team Dark managed to convince him to eat, sleep, and do chores on regular intervals, whenever Shadow had a spare moment he’d stay in his room, watching and waiting. Their friends got so worried that Rouge and Omega had used everything in their power to coax him out of the house twice over those five days, but he refused to do any more. Even then his outings had to come with the promise that they’d both stay home, check it every five minutes, and call him the absolute moment something happened.
On the sixth day of waiting, the cocoon began to hatch while Shadow was attempting to discreetly read out loud to the chao from one of his favorite books. The moment he saw the split, he dropped the novel, jumped up, and shouted louder than he had in months- “Rouge! Omega! It’s HAPPENING!”
He hovered so closely around the cocoon that Omega had to physically pull him back as Rouge reminded him to give the chao more space. Within moments, the split had widened enough for a single black paw to poke out, feeling around carefully for some sort of purchase to pull itself the rest of the way outside. Soon enough, it had succeeded, earning- impressively enough- widened eyes from Omega and a gasp from both Shadow and Rouge.
Frowning light blue eyes were set in an equally grumpy (albeit adorable) face, with two little black ears and three tiny quills on the chao’s head. The ears and quills both had red stripes, as did the arms, legs, and even its tail. A red crescent shape sat on its chest, and two tiny purple bat wings flapped slowly behind it.
In short, it looked a lot like a tiny Shadow.
The hedgehog in question reached out carefully and began to pet his chao, offering some quiet words of praise, but before long it flew up and settled in its favorite spot in between his ears. When Shadow turned around to face his friends, they were met with the sight of a little glowering creature settled on top of his head…which really did look far too similar to the hybrid himself when he was irritated. 
Rouge covered a smile with both of her hands. “Shadow...hon…”
He frowned at her, only serving to make the resemblance more obvious. “What?”
“It looks exactly like you!”
“Not really- it has blue eyes and...bat wings…” He looked up at her suddenly. “Rouge...how much time have you been spending with Spark again?”
“Oh, just a little- wait, Spark?” she said quickly, redirecting his attention.
Shadow flushed a bright green at that. “I might’ve already picked out a name...does it sound alright?” he asked, studiously looking anywhere but at his friends.
The chao chirped at the name and snuggled a little further into the fur on his head, seemingly pleased with the title. 
He began to smile at that. “You like that name, do you?” he asked teasingly.
“It sure looks like it! I think it’s a lovely name, hon.” Rouge added.
The chao cooed, cementing its name with all of the team (whether Omega would admit it or not).
Now, if anything, Shadow and his chao were even more close than before. Rouge even bought it a tiny leather jacket to match his style, which was quickly deemed by everyone (especially their friends, to whom she’d sent about fifty photos) the most adorable thing ever. 
...
One day, Shadow came home from lunch out with Silver and Blaze only to discover a quite unexpected scene- though he really should have seen it coming, considering what he’d noticed after his chao had hatched. Rouge was kneeling next to the sofa, scratching Spark behind the ears and saying in what could only be described as a baby voice, “Who’s your favorite momma? Me, that’s right. That’s right, isn’t it?”
“Uh….” he interrupted, feeling more than a little uncertain as to how to respond to this. He was torn between “I didn’t know you had a baby voice” and “I’m glad to see you and Spark getting along” and wasn’t entirely sure which one to go with here.
The bat, on the other hand, jumped a good three feet in the air at the sound before glaring at Shadow furiously. “Don’t startle me like that!” she shouted, more than a little tense...and also a bit worried?
The hybrid didn’t react, instead saying “It’s nice to see you spending time with Spark too, Rouge.” with a smile. 
She relaxed a little at that, and Shadow sighed. “Rouge, I wouldn’t make fun of you- I do the same kind of thing, don’t I?”
“You’re right, you’re right.” the bat admitted. “I just had to! It looks like me- it even has my wings! How could I not?”
Shadow moved to sit down on the sofa at that, reaching out to pat the chao as well. Rouge smiled at him gratefully, and then they both looked down at the cute creature in between them, who was promptly staring up at both with a confused look on its face. After a moment, though, it seemed to realize that everything was alright and nuzzled both Mobians before curling up on the couch happily.
Another time, the entire team was out grocery shopping at their favorite store when Spark’s eye was caught by the soft, warm cinnamon buns sitting behind a glass case. After a minute or two of desperate pulling at the seams- to no avail- it flew over to Shadow and began to poke at his shoulder until he turned to look at it.
“Yes? What is it?” he asked, giving the chao a little scratch under the chin.
The chao pointed excitedly at the sweet treats, but its expression melted into one of dismay upon hearing him say “No, Spark, that’s not very good for you- and it’s too big for you to finish all by yourself, too.”
It mimed a clock insistently- they didn’t go to the store that often, after all- its frown deepening all the while. Shadow felt a little uncertain- he enjoyed giving the chao treats, but was now really the best time to feed it so much sugar? It could end up flying all over the place, and he really didn’t feel like getting banned from yet another grocery store. (The last one had been because Omega got a little too excited while messing around with the shopping cart and had melted it and twisted it into a knot...somehow. They were rapidly escorted out after that.)
Suddenly, though, the chao shuffled forward, took one of his fingers in between its tiny paws, and stared up at him with the softest, most pleading look it could possibly manage, its eyes wide and mouth quivering. “No...no, come on…” Shadow protested weakly, but already his resistance was melting away. It practically seemed to be saying haven’t I been good all week? Can’t I please just have this one treat? and the hybrid was in no condition to fight back.
Within moments, Spark was holding a cinnamon roll and dug into it with glee, only pausing once to nuzzle Shadow happily and offer him a quick bite as thanks. He accepted the gesture of appreciation easily (even though now his face had sugar on it after the chao’s affectionate thank-you) and was more than happy to see his chao smiling broadly with the treat in its hands.
The chao was, of course, still a great help to Shadow as well. One night in particular, it woke up to the sounds of quiet whimpering and began to look around, startled. For a moment, it turned to its caretaker for help- and then discovered that he was the one in trouble.
Shadow was curled up on his side, his brow creased in distress and his whole body shaking terribly. His eyes were squeezed tightly shut and occasionally the most terribly saddening sounds would escape his mouth. Once or twice, a tear escaped and trickled down his face.
Spark crawled up to his face gently, licking away the tear and nuzzling his cheek. Shadow shuddered briefly, but seemed to relax almost infinitesimally when the dark chao pressed itself against his chest for a moment. Eventually, the creature managed to get him to roll onto his back, at which point it crawled onto his chest, hoping that this would help him begin to relax.
It really did work- within moments, the small, warm weight on his chest made Shadow’s breathing even out and his shivers ease as the nightmare that was plaguing him began to fade.
Spark curled up, pleased with itself, and fell back asleep not long after.
There was just one problem amongst all this newly-discovered happiness that came with the chao. Ever since it had evolved out of its cocoon, Omega seemed as though he were hardly willing to interact with it.
Rouge or Shadow would hand it over to him, only to get it back less than a minute later. He spent the least amount of time with it out of the three, but when he was asked if he didn’t like the chao, he never said as much. 
Omega didn’t tend to lie...but then why wouldn’t he do anything with it?
Once or twice, they’d caught him merely staring at Spark as the little creature sat on the couch, his optics clicking but otherwise utterly silent. The two Mobians hardly knew what to make of it- he’d never acted like this before.
They finally had the opportunity to discover why he was behaving strangely several days later, though, entirely due to an accident on Shadow’s part. Rouge and Omega had been answering a distress call regarding some rogue G.U.N. robots and needed to call in the hybrid to help. He’d driven his motorbike directly to the scene and leapt straight into battle…
...and hadn’t noticed Spark peeking out of the bag he’d left on his bike.
The chao- while fast, to be sure- was in no way prepared for a full-on battle. While at first it had hoped to help its little family, flying about uncertainly in hopes of doing something, it quickly discovered that the only thing it could really do was to hide behind an upended concrete slab and hope it wasn’t noticed.
That, unfortunately, didn’t quite work out.
It didn’t take long before one of the rogue drones spotted a fourth heat signature aside from the three it was fighting and began to stalk towards it, charging its laser cannon in the process. Shadow, confused at first, felt his stomach drop in horror upon seeing his tiny chao shaking in fear as the machine advanced on its hiding spot. He hadn’t thought to bring a Chaos Emerald, believing this would be an easy battle- and Rouge was busy in the air.
The laser cannon on the drone was almost fully charged, and Shadow fired up his skates in a futile attempt to somehow reach Spark before-
A white hot blast lit up the area.
Shadow couldn’t have stopped the strangled cry that came from his mouth if he had wanted to. The smoke began to clear, and he almost couldn’t look…
Something stirred within the haze, and as it cleared away, Shadow felt his whole body sag with relief upon seeing Omega shifting to an upright position from where he’d shielded the chao with the back of his chassis, blocking the full force of the laser. He let out a sigh as he caught a glimpse of Spark held safely in Omega’s hand as the other one retracted to reveal a flamethrower.
“MY TURN.”
Within moments, the drone was just so much melted slag on the floor and the battle’s tide was turned. Shadow and Rouge dispatched the other robots and then rushed to Omega, who had held onto the chao this entire time.
“Omega...thank you.” Shadow said, taking Spark from his friend and holding it tightly.
“IT WAS- zzzt- NOTHING.” Omega said, a sudden staticky buzz splitting his sentence in two.
“Omega?” Rouge asked, her eyes narrowing. “What happened to you?”
“NOTHING.” he said hurriedly, his voice still glitching. “WAIT- DON’T YOU D-DARE-”
The three had already begun looking to see what had happened...but then froze when they saw the damage his back panel had taken while shielding Spark from the blast. A giant, smoking hole of warped and fused metal was burned into his chassis, revealing a bunch of melted and sparking wiring that definitely needed urgent attention.
“Omega…” Shadow looked horrified.
Rouge frowned, confused. “Why would you do this to yourself? I know how much you hate having to go get repairs.”
The robot let out a burst of static that sounded almost like a resigned sigh. Turning around, he muttered, “IT’S LI-LITERALLY YOU. AND ROUGE. BUT TINY. THAT APPEARS TO HAVE… STRANGE EFFECTS- zzzt- ON MY BEHAVIOR.”
“Do you...not like those effects?” Rouge asked, now clearly shifting into ‘I’m figuring things out’ mode. “Is that why you’ve been avoiding it so often?”
“I AM A ROBOT OF MASS DESTRUCTION. I AM NOT SUPPOSED TO CARE FOR TINY CREATURES SUCH AS THIS ONE. I SHOULD NOT FEEL ANY ‘WORRY’ ABOUT IT- AND YET-” Omega cut off there with a frustrated crackle.
Shadow still didn’t understand. “You’ve always been a robot of mass destruction, but you never thought it was weird to worry about us before.”
“THAT WAS DIFFERENT!” Omega insisted. “YOU BOTH ARE POWERFUL. IT IS NATURAL THAT RESPECT AND CONSEQUENTLY OTHER THINGS SHOULD COME FROM THAT. BUT THIS-! IT HAS NO DESTRUCTIVE QUALITIES! BUT STILL I...YOU KNOW...”
“It’s official, Omega.” Rouge said at that, a smirk growing on her face. “You’re becoming more and more like us...organics are always weak for cute things.”
“IT IS SHAMEFUL THAT I SHOULD COME TO THIS.” he grumbled.
“It’s not so bad, really.” Shadow said, placing a hand on his arm.
“And that’s coming from the guy who never used to admit he cares about people!” Rouge insisted. “Omega, you know you don’t have to be embarrassed about that kind of thing here- you’d never make fun of Shadow for not being tough all the time, would you?”
“I GUESS NOT…” he said, still seeming irritated.
At this point, Spark flew up to sit in Omega’s hand, looking up at the robot with its little frowning face, before reaching out and patting a single finger solemnly with its paw.
“OH NO.”
“Oh yes.” Rouge answered, grinning. “Let’s get you to Tails now though, okay? Then once you’re fixed up you can come home and pet the chao.”
Omega turned his head away and refused to dignify that with a response.
(He did, however, pet the chao when he got home. Nobody teased him about it, for which- while he’d never say it- he was rather grateful.)
It was inevitable, eventually, that Team Dark’s schedule wouldn’t be perfect and that they’d all have to be out and busy at some point. This, of course, meant that Spark would have to be dropped off at the chao daycare. 
Shadow had managed to force himself to reconcile with that fact, but the chao wasn’t nearly as good at that sort of thing.
On the day of, it was sobbing desperately, clinging to Shadow’s jacket with a tight grip as though it’d been handed a horrible punishment instead of a day spent at the warm, welcoming building in front of it. “It’s going to be alright. You’ll be okay, it’s just for a day. See, the Mobians who run it are very nice- won’t you look?” the hybrid whispered in a soothing voice, gently rubbing Spark’s head.
Omega stepped forward. “DON’T YOU...WANT TO SHOW HOW BRAVE YOU CAN BE?” he said awkwardly. Talking to the chao was still taking some getting used to for him, but he was definitely trying his best.
Rouge smiled warmly at that. “Of course! We’ll all be so proud of you, don’t you know that?”
“We can make a cake especially for you when you get home too, alright?” Shadow said, and that was the final thing the chao needed to hear. Wiping its eyes with a final few sniffles, it flew over to the little walkway towards the entrance and stood up tall, its body shaking slightly with leftover stress and its attempts not to cry.
“We love you!” Rouge called, blowing it a quick kiss.
“See you soon.” Shadow said gently, waving with a smile.
“YOU’LL BE THE BEST ONE THERE.” Omega added, shuffling in place a little.
The chao whimpered briefly, but then turned away and bounded into the daycare before it could lose its nerve. 
Throughout the morning, it remained relatively antisocial- a bit like the hedgehog whose appearance it had taken- during the music and karate lessons. The other chao all babbled and played together, being mostly neutral and hero-types, and the few dark chao that were there wanted to cause an awful lot more trouble than Spark was in the mood for.
One thing that it noticed very clearly, though, was the extraordinarily frustrating presence of a royal blue hero and speed-type chao.
This chao didn’t seem to think even once (let alone twice) about anything it did. It banged on the drums until Spark’s ears were sore during music class and then somehow managed to smack it in the face during karate lessons twice, and all the while it chatted away with about five other chao all around it.
Needless to say, by midday, when it was playtime, Spark had just about had enough.
When the blue chao rushed directly through the little sand city that it had been carefully building, swiping everything away with a single dash, Spark growled, picked up the plastic shovel it had been playing with, and threw it so hard it whacked the other creature in the arm.
Snarling, it began to stomp off when it felt a hand on its shoulder. The blue chao darted away and began hurriedly to try and rebuild the city, occasionally glancing up at Spark with an apologetic expression in its eyes.
It...looked awfully sad, actually.
Suddenly, the dark chao remembered how it had quickly stopped banging on the drums when the teacher had told it to, and how it had looked rather guilty when it had smacked Spark in the face, and how excited it was when talking with the other chao…
Maybe it was just a little clumsy sometimes.
Spark sighed a little. The other meant well, it decided, as its anger began to fade. It appreciated the apology...but now the sculptures were gone and it couldn’t get them back. Then, though, its gaze fell upon a pair of toy cars sitting nearby. 
Pulling the blue chao over to a strip of flat, packed earth nearby, it gave one car to its surprised companion and then set its own down at a line that could work quite well as the start of a race.
Soon enough, the other creature worked out the idea and began to cheer with delight, and before long they were racing cars like they’d been friends since the start. Eventually, they even switched to running races themselves, over and over again until they were all worn out and collapsed on the cool grass in a heap. Before long, though, they were up and at it again, only this time they started with a building game, and then had a little fun with the musical instruments, and soon enough Spark couldn’t help but wonder how they had ever fought in the first place.
Eventually, they decided that their next activity would be a race to the top of the jungle gym they noticed nearby. Spark was determined not to lose as it scrambled up the bars. It pulled itself paw over paw up the structure, getting closer and closer to the top, until-
Suddenly, a bar that it had been sure existed in front of it only a moment ago was now clearly just a little too far away, and the mistake caused it to reel forward, desperately clinging to the slippery bar it sat on. It twisted head over heels until it slid and fell all the way back to the ground, the wind slammed forcefully out of its little lungs.
Spark gasped soundlessly, trying and failing to pull air back into itself. After several agonizing seconds, it finally caught its breath- and then nearly got it knocked back out again by the impact of its new friend.
Regaining focus, the dark chao realized with a start that its friend was practically wailing into its chest, the soft blue creature shaking with desperate, panicked sobs. It looked up quickly, its eyes swollen and teary, and then reached out with its paws and hurriedly patted Spark’s body down, as though to reassure itself that the dark chao was still there. 
The creature in question sat up and pulled its friend into a tight hug, feeling nothing less than awful as the blue chao sniffled and whimpered worriedly in its arms. Eventually, it managed to calm down enough to amble over to a small nest made of blankets especially for tired chao and lay down there next to Spark. The two chao curled up together, nuzzling gently as the shaky breaths of the blue one finally evened out.
Spark felt the little ball over its head pop into a heart shape, and noticed briefly that its friend had done the same. They remained curled up like that for the last half-hour or so of their time in the daycare, alternately simply cuddling or talking about their respective owners.
Spark hoped they’d get to spend more time with this friend of theirs soon.
Shadow pulled up to the daycare on his motorcycle at closing time, doing his best to smooth out his frazzled quills. It wouldn’t be very good to let his chao know that he’d been nearly as worried about it as it had felt itself. 
He sighed, making his way towards the entrance of the building- and instantly felt the last wisps of his composure vanish upon seeing Sonic standing just inside. Before he could panic and flee the area at top speed, his legs (which didn’t seem to have received the message just yet) carried him through the door and inside.
Almost immediately, the blue hedgehog turned to face him with a bright smile. “Oh! Hey, Shadow!” Sonic said happily. “I didn’t know you brought your chao here, too! I’ve gotta say hi to the little guy again sometime!”
“This is my first time bringing it here. If it’s alright with that…I suppose you may.” the hybrid said, trying his best to sound coherent and cool (but actually just seeming stiff and awkward).
They talked for a little while as they waited for their chao to come out, chatting about their lives and friends. More than once, Shadow had to pinch himself in order to stay focused. His mind kept threatening to wander off into dreamland when he was around the hero, ready to admire his many great qualities (and wonderful appearance) at the drop of a hat.
Eventually, though, he became a bit worried by the fact that chao after chao were wandering out through the playroom door, being collected, and leaving…but neither Spark nor Sonic’s chao had even showed up. Soon enough, the two decided to walk into the room and find their tiny charges themselves.
“Uh, hi, mixter!” Sonic greeted the leopard who ran the daycare. “Didja see my lil’ buddy somewhere around here?”
“Oh, hello Sonic!” they said brightly- clearly the hero had been to this place quite a few times before. “Yes, your chao is over there in that nest there, sorry. I just hated to disturb those two…”
Shadow frowned. Those two?
His question was promptly answered when Sonic whisked aside the blanket covering the nest, only for both of them to stare at the sight inside.
Two purring chao, one clearly Sonic’s and the other obviously Shadow’s, were snuggled up together with big hearts floating over their heads. Even the hybrid’s dark chao, notorious for its ever-present frown, looked completely at peace with a small smile on its face.
He tried his best not to freak out.
“Erm…” Shadow began eloquently.
“Uh…” Sonic replied.
The two chao perked up at this, looking happily at their owners before nuzzling gently together in a manner that made Shadow’s stomach leap into his throat and then crash straight through the floor. In a further twist (both in events and in the striped hedgehog’s internal organs), Sonic’s chao then leapt happily into his arms, leaving Shadow to stare at the tiny version of his crush cuddling into his chest fur.
He sincerely hoped there was a convenient couch nearby for him to sit down on.
“Blu- come on-” Sonic began, looking oddly panicked for some reason, but then Spark sprang eagerly onto his shoulder and the hero rapidly fell silent as the dark chao nudged his cheek.
The two hedgehogs stared at each other for a long time. Shadow tried to move or do something other than just stand there, but it was awfully difficult when the hero was looking at him with those wide, soft green eyes….
“Er…Sonic?” Shadow finally choked out, in an odd, strained sort of tone.
“Yeah?”
“I think I’d like my chao back now.”
“Yeah.”
They each handed over their respective creatures, though Shadow felt rather reluctant to let such a tiny version of Sonic out of his arms. And for a moment he could almost have sworn that the hero held Spark a little longer than necessary, too…
Once he got home, the hybrid collapsed onto the couch and covered his eyes briefly with a hand. Spark, who had at first rushed into the kitchen (not having forgotten the promise of cake), came back and began to tug on his arm briefly before realizing that maybe Shadow wasn’t quite up to doing much of anything at the moment.
Rouge and Omega walked in just a moment later, their work having ended a little after Shadow’s. Upon seeing him slumped on the furniture, though, their greetings were cut short and instead replaced by worried questions.
Shadow sighed. “Spark...just spent a bunch of time cuddling with Sonic’s chao. And he noticed.”
“And that’s a good thing, hon.” Rouge shot back, having resisted a facepalm the moment she realized what all this was about.
“It is not!” the hedgehog cried out, before realizing that Spark was more than a little stressed by his tone of voice. “I’m not mad at you, don’t worry, it’s just...I already make enough of a fool of myself around him on my own. He’ll figure it out soon enough if we keep this up.”
“SO LET HIM.” Omega said. “EITHER HE STARTS DATING YOU OR HE’S AN IDIOT.”
Shadow blushed furiously. “It doesn’t work like that!”
“EXCEPT WHEN IT DOES.”
“Why don’t you tell him, hon?” Rouge asked. “I mean…” and here she developed a devious smile, “...didn’t his chao technically also act all affectionate with yours?”
The hybrid’s ears were bright green by now. “He’s nice to everyone, Rouge.”
At this point, Spark- who had left temporarily to get a pencil and paper- held up a drawing it had made of the scene at the jungle gym earlier. Shadow, of course, immediately began fussing over his chao, checking for any bruises or scrapes, but the bat in particular saw something entirely different.
“Kinda...reminds me of what happened on Space Colony ARK.” she mused. 
Shadow’s head shot up at that. “What?”
Rouge smirked, but it was bittersweet this time. “Your fall...it really hurt him too, y’know? He didn’t go out in public for a long time after that.”
“He...he never mentioned that to me…”
“He wouldn’t have!” she said. “Sonic isn’t the type to ‘bother’ others with his feelings.” Rouge explained, doing air quotes at one point.
“HE ALSO STARES AT YOU WHEN YOU ARE NOT LOOKING.”
“He what?!” By now Shadow had been reduced to just looking back and forth between his two friends. 
Spark flew in front of Shadow’s face and began to mime something. First pointing at Shadow, then a heart, then talking, then a hedgehog with all its quills pointed down…
“No! I can’t just tell him!”
“We’re hanging out with his team next week at the park- you should do it then.” Rouge replied, ignoring the last thing he’d just said.
“Did you not hear me, I can’t-”
“YOU WILL NEED SOMETHING NICE TO WEAR.” Omega said loudly over the rest of his sentence.
Spark cheered approvingly.
“So...you three have just decided for me whether or not I’m going to confess to Sonic.” Shadow sighed, beginning to resign himself to the fact.
“Absolutely, hon!” Rouge said brightly, slipping an arm around his shoulders.
He glowered at all three of them, but it lacked any real malice. “Alright, I’ll play along...for now.” he grumbled.
“EXCELLENT. LET THE PLANNING COMMENCE.”
One week later, Shadow was standing in the middle of a patch of grass, feeling like his knees were about to buckle as sweat trickled through his quills. He was no longer resigned to telling Sonic about his feelings and was in fact considering jumping into the nearby lake and hiding there for the duration of the hangout. His stomach- along with whatever scraps of resolve he may have had- were currently all the way back at their house.
On top of all that, he was frankly surprised he didn’t just spontaneously burst into flames when the other three Mobians showed up, Sonic in the lead.
“Hey guys!” he said excitedly. “Long time no see!”
Rouge snickered a bit at his catchphrase (it was one of many) but Shadow just felt his ears burn. He was just so cute and cheesy and already the hybrid’s mind was devolving into a mushy mess.
“Rouge, Omega.” he greeted them each, but he seemed to pause for a second on the last name. “...Shadow.”
The hedgehog in question thankfully managed a reply, and then the fun began in earnest. Knuckles and Shadow competed in several arm-wrestling matches with narration from Tails (“...aaaand Knuckles looks like he’s in the lead!”) and commentary from Omega (“YOU’RE LUCKY I DON’T ARM-WRESTLE OR ELSE BOTH OF YOUR ARMS WOULD BE BROKEN.”). Rouge and Sonic were busy pranking other innocent people, though once in a while the latter would look over at the competition, distracted.
Eventually, Tails and Omega got bored- which of course meant Knuckles and Shadow had to play the role of caretaker (“No, you can’t blow up trees. No, not even for ‘science’.”) for a little while.
At one point, though, Rouge got bored with the pranks and had dragged the echidna off to a park bench and was now flirting with him enough to turn his face as red as his spines. Tails had promised to behave- which now meant that he was halfheartedly attempting to convince Omega not to modify his cannon to launch ducks from the nearby pond- leaving Sonic and Shadow to themselves. Blu and Spark had been playing in the grass all this time (since both of them had brought their chao without really realizing that the other would do the same), and Shadow had very definitely not been thinking about how lucky his chao was that emotions were easy for it.
He remembered the talk his friends had given him before this outing then and wondered if maybe, just maybe, it could be that easy. Before he could stop himself, he’d already spoken.
“...Sonic?”
“Yeah?” the hero asked, turning to face Shadow.
“I...wanted to talk to you about something.” he said, regretting everything already because look how stupid he was about to seem...yet Shadow Robotnik the Hedgehog had never been one to do things by halves.
“Oh, really?” Sonic said, and now he almost looked relieved, for some reason. “I, uh, was actually hoping to do the same. That’s cool, what is it?”
“No, no, you go first.” Shadow urged him, hoping that he’d take the offer.
Unfortunately, today was not his lucky day. “No, man, you asked first! Go ahead, what was it?”
“Really- it’s fine.”
“No, you had something you wanted to say!” Sonic insisted.
“It’s okay, I swear-”
“Well, I guess-”
“I mean, if you want-”
“Okay-”
“You see-”
“I like you!”
Both hedgehogs shouted the words at the exact same time, before freezing and staring at each other.
“Wait…” Shadow began.
Sonic’s eyes were wide. “You like me back?!?” he gasped, hands flying up to his mouth.
“...yes.” he admitted, looking off to the side in embarrassment. Then it hit him. “Wait. You like me back?”
“Of course! How could I not?” Sonic asked incredulously. “You’re smart, funny, nice-” He’d begun listing off attributes while counting on his fingers, but cut himself off upon noticing Shadow’s confusion.
“Yes, but you’re a hero. The world’s hero.” Shadow began to frown, staring at the grass. “Why would you settle for someone like-”
“No.” Sonic growled, and the hybrid looked up suddenly to see his face twisted in anger. “Don’t ever say that.”
“But everyone thinks it…” Shadow protested weakly.
“Yeah, well, ‘everyone’ isn’t part of my love life.” Sonic assumed a slightly less aggressive stance, placing a hand on his hip. “Whoever’s been telling you that can either leave you alone or get their face introduced to my sneakers.”
Shadow blushed. “Nobody needed to. I just assumed...but perhaps I shouldn’t have.” he added quickly, seeing the hero begin to glower again. 
“That’s right!” he said, zipping over to stand directly in front of Shadow. “No assumptions here- talk to me from now on if something’s worryin’ you, ‘kay?”
Then, he seemed to notice the sudden stiffness in the hybrid’s posture, as well as the green flush slowly creeping up his ears. Sonic leaned forward with a smirk, resting his forearm on Shadow’s shoulder. “Thinkin’ about something?”
Shadow gulped.
For once, he decided that he could do what he wanted. So, he slowly reached up a hand and touched the peach fur on Sonic’s arm gently, like it was the most delicate thing in the world. 
Rather more quickly, Sonic turned a shade of bright red to rival Omega’s paint job.
“So, uh…” he began, his voice shaky. “Erm...do ya feel like sitting under that tree? Together?”
Shadow agreed, and the two walked over to the shady patch, sitting down and resting against each other. Soon enough, though, Sonic turned to face Shadow, a little nervous. “Do we, like, need to talk about this? Figure out...what to do about…us?” He started turning pink again.
“Maybe later. We have a lot of time, after all.” Shadow said, trying to contain the soaring feeling inside when Sonic said ‘us’- until he realized that he didn’t have to any longer.
“What’re you smiling about?”
“You. And me. Together.” Shadow said simply, making Sonic laugh and snuggle up against him, resting his head on a black-furred shoulder.
“Wow. That’s, uh….that’s new. I really like it though.”
Then, the hero looked up at him. “I really like you, too.”
At this point, a loud whistle could be heard from Rouge, who was standing not too far off and had likely heard a lot of what they’d said. Sonic just giggled, while Shadow shot her a death glare. She just winked and mouthed I’ll keep them occupied, at which point the hybrid tried not to show how very much he appreciated that and failed miserably.
And Sonic was purring now. Which of course meant that every single brain cell in Shadow’s head was promptly dead for the next five minutes.
After he’d recovered from that, Shadow wrapped his arms tightly around his...boyfriend? Maybe? He thought for a moment. “Hey, Sonic?”
“Yeah?”
“How do you feel about being my-” Shadow paused briefly to cough, trying to get the words out- “-boyfriend?”
“I think I like that a lot.”
Shadow smiled warmly, feeling the beginnings of a purr rise up in his own chest.
“I like that a lot, too. Almost as much as I like you.”
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jungshookz · 4 years
Note
EEEK cee imagine grumpy!yn and jimin where jimin falls asleep on the floor in their lil hangout spot bc he stayed up the night before and yn jus secretly admiring jimin’s adorable sleeping face while caressing his hair THEN jimin wakes up when yn leaned in for a kiss on his forehead :3:3:3
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➺ pairing; sunshiney!jimin x grumpy!y/n
➺ genre; of course this is fluff!!! fluffier than the clouds that jimin makes y/n look at and tell him what animal she thinks it looks closest to :D (he thinks it looks like a bunny and she thinks it looks like a.,,. idk man that’s literally just a lump) 
➺ wordcount; 1.3k 
➺ p.s. you’ll be able to find this in the teeny tidbits masterlist later on :’) 
(unfortunately i wasn’t able to track down the original maker of this gif but this is where i sourced it from! all credits go to the original creator of course :-))
                                     »»————- ☁️ ————-««
“oh my god, do you hear that?” yoongi gasps, placing a hand on your shoulder before holding a finger up in the air, “that’s incredible.”
?
“what are you talking about?” you frown, looking around as well before shrugging his hand off your shoulder, “i don’t hear anything.”
you and namjoon exchange confused glances and he offers you his own shrug before looking over at yoongi for further explanation
“exactly. it’s nothing. it’s… silence.” yoongi whispers, “i haven’t heard it in so long because jimin’s always destroying it with his motormouth-”
oh
okAy
now you see what he’s going on about
“hey, cut it out-” you roll your eyes before shifting your shoulder slightly so that jimin’s head isn’t at a weird angle and that he won’t wake up with a weird kink in his neck, “he was up all night working on a paper and he’s tired.” you murmur, reaching over and pulling your cardigan up so that it covers his chest a little more
“you know, you were way more fun before you started dating jimin.” yoongi scoffs, pursing his lips in disappointment as he leans back against his palms, “when two people are making fun of someone, it’s all fun and games, but when it’s just me doing it alone, i look like an asshole-”
“oh, cry me a river.”
“see?? why can’t you be like that when you’re talking about jimin?? i miss the old y/n.” 
you move to shove yoongi down to the ground but you stop yourself when you realize that you could accidentally wake jimin up prematurely 
poor jimin was up until six this morning working on a dumb twenty-page report for one of his courses - he read his schedule wrong and it turns out that the report was due this tuesday and not next tuesday, and to be honest, he’s really not sure how he even made that mix-up in the first place because he’s usually always on top of things (you were on top of him when he was typing all of this into his phone so that might’ve had something to do with it)
and he normally gets up around seven-ish on a regular basis which means he literally only got an hour of sleep before he had to get up and get ready for the day
you already knew that he had pulled an all-nighter (you even offered to stay up with him and make him coffee if he needed it but you ended up falling asleep around twenty minutes after you’d made your bold offer) so you weren’t too surprised when you looked over halfway through lunch to see that he’d fallen asleep leaning back against the tree with his mouth wide open
yoongi nearly persuaded you into dropping a chunk of dirt into his open mouth but luckily you decided against doing that
and it didn’t look like he was very comfortable which was why you scooted yourself closer to him and gently pushed his head down so that he could rest on your shoulder
but that was an hour and a bit ago and jimin’s still fast asleep
and you’re pretty sure there’s dried drool on your arm but that’s okay
“-you know, it’s like i don’t even know who you are anymore.” yoongi tuts, shaking his head at you, “one minute, you’re happy to roll your eyes and insult jimin to his face, and the next, you’re cozying up to him like his girlfriend and straight-up fawning over him-”
“i- i am his girlfriend, you dolt-”
“i know, but like- well, you know what i mean.” yoongi flicks his wrist to dismiss you before turning his nose up towards the sky, “you get it.”
“i can honestly say i truly don’t, yoongi.”
yes, it’s fairly evident to see that you’ve changed quite a bit since getting together with jimin, but you like to think that you changed for the better!
you don’t wake up with a scowl on your face every morning which is definitely a good sign, right?
and now instead of staying silent during lunch and looking like you want nothing more than to watch the world burn, you actually contribute to conversations with everyone else and genuinely enjoy talking to them as long as jimin’s right there next to you 
of course, you have to admit that you still have a slight issue with PDA (which is why you’ve been moving your shoulder and trying to get jimin to wake up without making it seem like you’re purposely trying to wake him up) but that’s a conversation for another time
the point is, things are good with jimin
things are really, really good with jimin.  
you crane your neck to look back down at your boyfriend again, reaching over to brush some of his hair away from his eyes
his nose twitches slightly and he mutters something under his breath before turning his body towards you and snuggling into your warmth, wrapping his arms around your elbow and squishing his cheek against your shoulder
“cute.” you hum, reminding yourself to suppress your grin of delight so that no one teases you about how squealy you’re being right now 
you find yourself leaning down a little so you can give jimin a kiss on the forehead, your lips lingering against his warm forehead for a second before you pull away and look back to make sure that no one just saw you do that (god forbid anyone see you show even an inkling of affection for your boyfriend!) 
luckily it seems like the late afternoon sun beaming down on you guys is making everyone feel a little lethargic so no one was paying attention to y-
“did you just kiss my forehead?”
you freeze immediately when you hear jimin suddenly speak up and you clear your throat obnoxiously before raising your shoulder so that he gets his head off of it, “what? no. i think you were probably dreaming or something because forehead kissing is-” you chuckle lightly, pulling your legs up slightly and dusting some dirt off your calves, “it’s not something that i… i don’t do things like that, so- no. no, i didn’t kiss any foreheads.”
your eyes widen in surprise when jimin suddenly lies down and flops his head down on your lap, grinning up at you with twinkling eyes as he reaches up to poke the tip of your nose, “you soOoooOo have a crush on me.”
side note: it’s truly baffling to you that jimin never wakes up groggy
he’s always ready to go as soon as his eyes open and it doesn’t make any sense whatsoever
it’s almost like he has an on and an off switch somewhere and if that’s the case you would very much like to find his off switch so you can shut him up before someone else decides to chime in to the conversation 
“we’re- we’re dating, jimin-” you scowl, flicking his hand away from your face before clearing your throat again, “...obviously i have a friggin’ crush on you if we’re in a goddamn relationship-”
“what are you grumbling about over there now, y/n?” namjoon interrupts you from across the circle, glancing up at you and jimin for a split second from behind his screen, “i’m trying to get some work done and i can’t focus with all the secret muttering-”
“y/n has a crush on me.” jimin teases, crossing his arms over his chest before closing his eyes again, “a super FAT crush on me.”
he cracks an eye open just to see your reaction and he’s pleasantly surprised to see that your entire face is basically beet-red from this fun little game he’s playing
what do you have to be so embarrassed about??
you already said yourself that the two of you are dating so it’s an obvious fact that you have feelings for him
he just likes to remind everyone that you, a typically emotionless, cold-hearted robot, have feelings for him!
“oh, we know!” namjoon plays along with a grin, loving that you look like you want nothing more than to curl into a ball and just scream, “you think we didn’t see that forehead kiss?”
“park jimin, you sick... twisted man.” yoongi purses his lips as he shakes his head slowly, “look what you’ve done to her! you’ve ruined her!!” 
🎙️help me help you make your wishes come true (send me a request!)
✨why don’t you explore the rest of the library while you’re here?
💫or perhaps you want something shorter to read?
🌟or something even shorter?
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acreepqueen · 4 years
Text
Inktober 2020 |Day 3: Bulky|
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You weren’t really sure what you were doing here. Anyone else on the ship being called to the main control room? Sure, that would make sense. Everyone else was basically a super genius. The crew was made up of the top experts in their respective fields; artificial advancement, extra-planetary biology, robotic engineering, universal travel, and so many more complicated fields you couldn’t hope to possibly grasp. But you? You were the ship’s gardener, in charge of keeping all the plants in the greenhouse room alive. Sure, you could name practically every single species of plant on Earth and otherwise and how to care for it, but it was never difficult for you to memorize information. In fact, because of your difference in field from literally every single other person on the ship, you hadn’t made any real friends. Which, after being on board for nearly two months, had made you lonely.
 In the past week or so, you’d often found yourself rambling to the ship’s AI. It’d made you feel more sad and lonely at first as they never really responded or offered up any sort of conversation. Although, by now it made you feel better. It was almost like writing in a diary; a daily ritual that kept you from falling apart at the seams. Speaking of falling apart at the seams, you hadn’t had a chance to check the garden this morning and were slightly worried some of the plants might start fighting each other if they weren’t fed soon. You shuffled nervously outside the control room, the air a little too cold and stale for your liking. Most of your time was spent in the greenhouse which always was kept relatively warm and smelt like walking outside. If you were being honest, you were starting to get a little homesick.
The pleasant little ding of control room doors stirred you from your thoughts. With a slight hesitancy you peered inside.Crew members were not really supposed to be in here. The main control room was only there for emergency use if the AI malfunctioned or something within the ship needed to be fixed. After all, the AI was fully capable of running everything on its own. You shuffled nervously unable to bring yourself to walk through the sliding doors. Why exactly had you been called? No matter how you looked at it, it didn’t make sense. Perhaps there had been a mix up and you weren’t meant to be called at all. Just as you were getting ready to walk away the familiar voice of the AI spoke out.
“Come in human. Do not touch anything,” it said. You stepped inside a little confused by its warning, though that didn’t last for long. You paled slightly as you looked around you. Bulky machinery lined the walls and parts were strewn across every table. Wires stuck out here and there some of which still seemed to be live. There was a narrow path where the floor was clear you could walk along. Whatever you’d expected the main control room to look like, it was not this! This place was practically a death trap! As slowly and as carefully as you could you shuffled along trying your best not to accidentally snag a live wire and electrocute yourself. All the while, you were being driven to madness by the constant barrage of noises; the whirring of countless fans trying desperately to keep the machinery intact, a suspicious beep that you didn’t want to know where or what it came from, and the alarming sound of sparks. Honestly, you’d rather be dealing with the lava-spewing plants in the greenhouse right now.
“Hello?” you called out nervously. You wanted to leave as soon as possible. It felt like every second you spent in this room was only increasing your likelihood of an untimely death. The lack of response was worrying, but it didn’t last for long.
“...To your left. On the table.” the AI stated without any sort of explanation. You glanced over to see something so incredibly out of place you couldn’t stifle a laugh. One of your flowered mugs was sitting on the clearest table in the room, filled with god knows what.
“...Is this for me? Can I pick it up?” you asked more than a bit befuddled. You glared slightly at the hazardous looking coil of wire sitting beside the cup. 
“Yes,” the AI replied. Were you curious enough to risk electrocution? Yes, yes you were. With not nearly enough contemplation you reached over and picked up the cup. You panicked slightly at the temperature of the cup; it was warm. Moving slowly as to not spill the dark liquid, you brought it towards you. You knit your brows at the familiar smell.
“Humans like coffee, yes?” the AI questioned. At that you let out a snort and couldn’t help the grin that spread across your face. Was this what you’d been called for? To pick up a cup of coffee? It was oddly cute and incredibly unexpected.
“I do, yes,” you responded sniffing the liquid before bringing it to your lips. Was it a smart idea to drink the coffee? No, absolutely not. Was it surprisingly delicious? Somehow, yeah. It didn’t taste like the instant coffee that was in the breakroom.
“I preordered coffee beans and needed human approval before removing the instant coffee. This is more nutritious. Is it acceptable?” the AI asked. You nodded and took another sip of the coffee.
“Was that all you needed from me?” you asked finally, feeling a bit awkward. After a slight pause the AI responded.
“Yes.”
You bid the AI goodbye and stumbled back through the mess of a control room, now feeling much better. Maybe your luck was starting to turn around. Hurriedly, you rushed over to the greenhouse to start your morning routine. At this point, you were just praying that the plants hadn’t started to eat each other. Though, even through your worries you couldn’t help the slight smile that spread across your face. It was a small gesture, but it meant bounds more than the AI could possibly comprehend. After all, it was probably selecting the least busy human of the group to do the taste-testing, not you specifically.
With a slight sigh, the AI watched you leave. Perhaps you wouldn’t be so miserable in the future. Not entirely sure what they were doing, the AI placed an order for some cookies. Those certainly weren’t nutritious. They supposed they’d have to think of a better excuse next time.
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fallen-gravity · 3 years
Text
Intellectual Adequacy
Stan hates to start any unnecessary conflict, especially when there’s a very real chance that Ford will be moving to California next year, but he knows deep down that if they don’t talk about this now then he’ll never have the courage to bring it up again.
“Wait,” Stan shouts to Ford, and he stops dead in his tracks.
~~
Notes: In which one little plot bunny that was preventing me from getting any work done becomes its own rabbit hole.
I genuinely cannot believe that in the six-seven years I've been in this fandom, I've never tried my hand at the fix-it-fic where Stan and Ford just talk it out as teenagers, just like they should've in canon. I've seen a lot of different approaches, but I feel like I've yet to see one that tackles it from the perspective of Stan's own battle with his self-worth, rather than the actions he or Ford have already taken.
AO3
Stan hates the principal’s office more than anywhere else in the world.
He swears, he’s called down every other week for something that’s not even his fault. He punched Crampelter in the nose for harassing some poor freshman? Principal’s office. He talks back to a teacher calling his classmate stupid for forgetting an “obvious” geometry equation? Principal’s office. He accidentally drops his pencil during an exam and bends over to pick it up? He must be cheating. Principal’s office.
If you asked him, the whole idea of sending kids to the principal’s office is pointless to begin with. Oh, you did something bad, and now we’re gonna make the big man in charge tell your mommy and daddy? How old do these people think they are?
Stan wishes he could say that this time is okay because they’re not even talking to him. They’re talking up a storm to Ford in there about another college scholarship and all the reasons why he and he alone would be the perfect candidate for some random school all the way out in California
But it’s not okay, because the longer Stan sits in the dumb waiting room the more he’s starting to feel like chopped liver. They’ve been in there for at least five minutes with no sign of stopping anytime soon, but every time Stan asks the secretary if he can just go back to class already she dismisses him with a wave of her hand and it’ll be your turn soon, sit back down.
He’s thinking of just sneaking out the next time the secretary buries her nose back into her magazine. It’s simple: just wait for her to pull it out from her desk, sneak by as quick as he can, and slip out the door and back to class before she can even notice he’s gone.
He stands from his chair, pretending to stretch and preparing to execute, but freezes solid when he hears his name being spoken from within the principal’s office.
“…What about our little free spirit Stanley?”
It’s Ma, and whatever it is they’re talking about in there, she isn’t happy about it. Frowning, Stan glances over at the secretary to make sure that she isn’t staring at him, and presses his ear to the office door to listen to their conversation more carefully.
The principal laughs in response. “That clown? At this rate he’ll be lucky if he graduates high school”
Stan’s taken aback by the harsh choice of words, but if he knows Ford, then he won’t just sit there and let the principal talk about him like that. He presses his ear further into the door, waiting for Ford to interrupt the principal’s rambling about how he’s never going to amount to anything with you just don’t know him like I do, or something along those lines, but it never comes.
Not a single interjection that…anything he’s saying is wrong. Not from Pa, not from Ford….and not even from Ma.
They don’t…all really believe that, right?
There has to be something else he’s missing. He bets they’re defending his honor right now, and the reason they’re not making a big scene about it is because they’re in public.
Yeah.
He’s got nothing to worry about.
He peeks into the window, expecting to see Ma glaring daggers into the principal, or Ford silently cursing him out behind his back, but what he’s met with is so much worse. Ma and Pa are exchanging warm smiles, and Ford is frantically shaking hands with the principal, beaming brighter than Stan’s ever seen in his entire life.
Matter of fact, Stan’s not sure he’s ever seen any of them look so happy in his entire life.
He’s worthless, he’ll never go anywhere, and they’re all smiling about it.
Stan’s heart drops to his stomach, and he slides to the floor to join it.
Is this some kind of cruel joke? Were they expecting him to listen in on their conversation? Is this their cruel workaround of telling him he’ll never amount to shit?
He sighs.
He stays there on the cold tiled floor for what feels like hours, contemplating all the times he’s been called dumb, or stupid, or a terrible influence on his brother. All of those times when he could brush it off just because it was coming from someone he didn’t care about.
But worthless?
Behind his back, spoken directly to people he loves, and they won’t even bother to defend him?
That one’s new, and if Stan is going to be completely honest with himself, it’s much harder to brush off his shoulders than all those other times.
Stan doesn’t even notice the office door opening until it nearly smacks him in the back of his head. He quickly jumps to his feet and brushes himself off, pretending the best that he can that he wasn’t just eavesdropping on them for the past ten minutes.
“Stanley!” Ford comes bursting out of the room, his grin threatening to split his face in two. “I just received the most incredible news! The admissions team at West Coast Tech heard about my science fair project, and-”
The beam suddenly slips from his face, replaced with some sort of mix of confusion and concern. “Is...Something wrong?”
Stan rubs at his eyes to make sure he hadn’t started tearing up without realizing it, but no, his eyes are bone dry.
Curse Ford’s stupid ability to read his mind.
Stan covers up the gesture of rubbing at his eyes with a yawn, and stretches his arms in the air. “Nothing except you taking forever in there” he flashes a fake smile easily. “Talk about a blabbermouth, am I right?” Stan gestures towards the principal with his thumb.
Ford laughs, and returns his gaze to the pamphlet in his hands. “I don’t know,” he says. “I don’t think he’s so bad”
Stan opens his mouth to quip back, but Ford doesn’t seem to be paying much attention anymore. He’s just staring at that dumb pamphlet, his grin slowly but surely returning to his face again.
Instead, Stan shoves his hands in his pockets and shrugs, turning his gaze to the floor. “Yeah, I guess you’re right”
~~~
Stan feels like he’s in a haze for the rest of the day. Even when he tries to focus on class to take his mind off of things and redirect it on anything else, he can’t get his mind to stick.  Not even final period gym class can save him, which is really saying something, because the gymnasium is usually the one place where he thrives.
Worthless.
The word won’t stop bouncing around in his skull, hitting him where he’s most sensitive.
It doesn’t help a thing that Ford is dead silent on their walk home from school. He’s usually chatting up a storm to Stan about stuff he doesn’t really understand, and under normal circumstances Stan can’t wait to get home so he can bury his head in his pillow and drown out the sound of Ford’s babbling.
But today he’s not even looking in Stan’s direction, just burying his nose in the West Coast Tech brochure with stars in his eyes, and now Stan wants nothing more than to hear Ford babbling on about his advanced physics classes.
It’s almost insulting.
Stan sighs, and lightly taps on Ford’s shoulder to catch his attention. “Can we talk?”
“Hmm?” Ford blinks, like he needs a few moments to readjust to reality. “Oh! Of course. I was actually planning on asking you the same thing” he places the brochure in his pocket. “Same place as always?”
Stan nods. “Same place as always”.
It’s a quick change of direction and a shortcut to the beach before they find themselves on their old swing set. By now they’re both too heavy to use it properly without a risk of snapping it, but they still find it’s a good place to go when they just need to get away and talk.
“You’re not really thinking of going to that stuffy old school, are you?” Stan asks as soon as Ford sits on the swing beside him. “They’ve gotta be crazy if they think four more years of essays and exams are better lookin’ than tanned babes and gold chains. We’re so close to finishing up the Stan-O-War. Soon as graduation rolls around we’re outta here, just like we always promised”.
Ford chuckles. “That is a nice thought, but…” he pulls the brochure out of his pocket again, and unfolds it for Stan to see. “You have to understand that I can’t just pass up an opportunity like this. Maybe I don’t need a degree from any old state school, but this is West Coast Tech we’re talking about!” he beams, the stars returning to his eyes. “They’ve got cutting edge technology and multidimensional paradigm theory”
Stan rolls his eyes, but he can’t help but admit to himself it’s nice to have his brother back again after an entire day of radio silence.
“Beep boop, giant nerd robot oncoming” Stan punches Ford in the arm.
Ford’s grin only widens. “I figured you’d say that, but it’s too late to change my mind. The head of admissions already flew in this morning, and with my go-ahead they’re going to check out my science fair project later tonight and let me know then and there if they want me at their school”
“Well that seems kind of harsh” Stan quips. “What if they say no?”
Ford shrugs. “Well, then it’s like you said. If they don’t want me, you and I sail off on the Stan-O War and never look back”.
Stan frowns at the strong emphasis on if. He really thinks he’s going to get this, doesn’t he? Stan can’t exactly blame him when he’s been the reigning valedictorian of their class every year since they were kids.
“And if they say yes?”
Ford grins. “Well, then you better visit me on the other side of the country” he punches Stan in the shoulder, and stands to his feet without saying another word.
Stan can’t bring himself to join him. He knows that Ford didn’t mean anything by it, but he can’t help feel wounded by his brother’s implication that while he’s off in California having the time of his life, Stan’s still gonna be stuck living with their parents in New Jersey.
It’s just like their principal said. He’ll never amount to anything anyway, so why wouldn’t he stay in New Jersey? Where else would a worthless piece of shit like him end up?
Stan shifts on his swing and watches as Ford walks away, and he can’t help but wonder just how much of the principal’s tangent that Ford believed.
All of it?
Some of it?
Had Ford even been listening to what he said at all?
As he continues to watch his brother walk away, he can’t help the feeling in his gut that he has to know. He hates to start any unnecessary conflict, especially when there’s a very real chance that Ford will be moving to California next year, but Stan knows deep down that if they don’t talk about this now then he’ll never have the courage to bring it up again.
“Wait,” Stan shouts to Ford, and he stops dead in his tracks.
“Yeah?” Ford says, turning around to face him. Stan suddenly finds himself very aware of his heart loudly pounding against his chest, but he forces himself to squash that down. He’s never felt shy or anxious about asking his brother anything, and he sure as hell isn’t letting that start now.
“You don’t…uh,” he swallows. “You don’t think I’m…worthless, do you?”
Ford looks appalled. He neatly folds the brochure back into his pocket and starts walking- no, jogging, almost sprinting back to the swing set. He pauses in front of the empty swing beside Stan for a moment, like he’s debating whether he should sit down or not, but eventually he shakes his head and sits down anyway.
“What on earth makes you say that?”  There’s a hint of anger to his tone, but Stan’s not entirely convinced it’s directed at him. “Why would I think you’re worthless? You’re my twin brother! What could’ve possibly put the idea in your head that I thought that?”
There’s a tiny voice in the back of his head screaming at him to back out, brush it off with a joke and have this conversation later, but there’s an even louder voice shouting at him that it needs to be had now.
Stan sighs. “I…overheard everything in the principal’s office today”
Ford blinks, like he doesn’t understand a word that Stan just said. “About…West Coast Tech? Is this because you’re afraid that I’ll get in, but you know you won’t because you’re not even interested in applying anyway, but you know you’re going to miss me, and you’re not sure if you can handle-”
“About me, Sixer!” Stan shouts, and tries his damn hardest to ignore the waver in his voice. “He practically called me a useless piece of shit directly to Ma and Pa and neither of them said a word about it!” He scrubs his hands down his face because he’s not choking up, not over something so pointless and stupid. “You’re going to travel the world and become the smartest person the scientific community has ever seen, or whatever, but me? Apparently I’ll always be stuck here in New Jersey to pick up after everyone else’s messes, because that’s all I’m ever good for”
Stan buries his face in his hands. He hadn’t meant to blow up, and he certainly hadn’t meant to direct his anger at Ford, but he just feels so hopeless, and he’s the only one around who’s willing to listen. He wouldn’t be surprised if Ford returned with anger of his own, or told him off for being selfish, or even if he just decided to stand up and walk away from him for being such an embarrassment.
The silence that follows is thick and heavy. Stan is so convinced that he must’ve driven Ford away that when he feels a hand on his shoulder he nearly jumps a mile out of his skin. When he finally pulls his hands out of his face to meet Ford’s eyes, his face is flushed pink and he looks…embarrassed.
“Stan, I had no idea, I…” he awkwardly pulls his hand away and grips tightly to the chain of his swing. Stan can see Ford’s face shifting through about a dozen different emotions at once. “I…must’ve been too focused on everything else to realize he was saying those things about you.” He shakes his head. “I know it’s not an excuse, but…” he sighs. “I’m sorry”
There’s another bout of silence between them. Stan’s half-expecting that to be the end of it, and for Ford to walk away without another word.  
But Ford breaks the silence with a sigh, and when Stan glances over at him he’s staring down at the ground.
“If it’s any consolation...you’re much smarter than me in a lot more places than you realize”
Okay, now Stan has to laugh. “Okay, now you’re being too nice to me. You don’t need to lie to make me feel better”
“I’m serious!” Ford’s cheeks flush pink again, and he adjusts his glasses before returning his gaze towards Stan. “There’s actually been a fascinating number of studies about intelligence lately, and, well…” Ford’s face is turning redder by the minute, Stan swears. “It turns out that…there’s more than one type”
Stan raises an eyebrow. “You’re losing me here, Sixer”
“Well, you see, I thrive in academic intelligence. Math, science, history, you know, school stuff. That’s the most commonly known type of intelligence because a lot of our formative years are based on it”
Stan doesn’t say anything, just raises his eyebrow even further.
“But,” Ford continues quickly, “They’ve also made discoveries about the existence of social intelligence”
“Social?” Stan blinks, suddenly finding himself significantly more interested. “You mean like talking to people and stuff?”
Ford nods. “Precisely. They say people with high social intelligence are much better at picking up on social cues, and can make friends with others much easier than those with lower social intelligence.” Ford kicks at the sand. “The reason social intelligence hasn’t been recognized is because it’s often mistaken for having a friendly personality”.  His face flushes pink again, like he’s afraid he said the wrong thing. “Not that a person can’t have both, but…”
Stan smirks, nudging at Ford with his elbow. “Stanford Pines, are you calling your good-for-nothing brother intelligent?” He teases, but can’t help the genuine smile creeping to his face.
“Think about it!” Ford throws an arm into the air, the other one tightly gripped on the swing to prevent himself from falling off. “Every time Ma and Pa leave us in charge of the shop so they can go to Atlantic City for the weekend, who’s the one bringing in all the customers? Who’s the one selling out our daily stock less than two hours after we’re open? You are, Stan, just by being yourself. You know how to persuade people into buying our stock at ten times the listed price.”
“You can’t learn that from twelve years of public school. They can try to teach you, but at the end of the day it’s all about your ability to connect with people” Ford rubs at his arm. “I’ve tried teaching myself those kinds of tricks for years, but at the end of the day…” he shakes his head. “I’ve never been able to catch up.” He smiles. “I raise my white flag to you, Stan. You’ve outsmarted the smartest brother in the world”
Stan chuckles. “Try telling that to Principal Comb-over. He hears you saying the so-called dumbest clown in the entire school system is smarter than you and he’s going to cart you away to the loony bin”
Ford laughs. “You know, now that I think about it, there may actually be a way to tell him off for what he said about you and get away with it scott-free”
Stan raises an eyebrow. “Yeah? How so?”
Ford smirks. “I think you should try to graduate out of spite”
Stan’s not sure he follows. “Whaddya mean?”
“I mean, think about it” Ford stands from his swing and begins to pace back and forth. “The principal called both of us down even though he only wanted to speak to me, and then he talked shit about you even though he knew you were sitting right outside his door?” he pauses in his pacing. “Stan, he knew that you could hear him. Maybe he didn’t intend for you to listen in when he was talking to Ma and Pa about my scholarship opportunity, but he knew you’d be listening the moment you were brought up in the conversation”
That’s…true. Stan was just about to sneak out before he heard them say his name.
“He’s expecting you to fail, and he wants to put it in everyone else’s head too. He thinks it’s the easy way out, because if you choose to fail out on your own than he doesn’t have to take responsibility for being such a shitty educator. It gives him the chance to say look how he didn’t even try instead of look at how we failed him.”
“But if you proved him wrong? Imagine the look on his face when he has to be the one to place that diploma in your hand. Imagine him having to look you dead in the eyes and tell you he’s proud of you. You’ll know he’s speaking bullshit, but he knows he can’t talk shit about you anymore without making himself look bad.” Ford smirks. “Matter of fact, imagine the looks on the faces of everyone who’s ever doubted you walking across that stage. Pa alone is gonna have a heart attack”
Ford’s smile softens. “I already know that you’re much smarter than you’re given credit for, and I think it’s about time that everyone else recognizes that too”.
Stan’s cheeks burn red, and he shyly kicks at the sand. “Heh, thanks. I appreciate it.” He says. “But even if I did manage to graduate, what am I supposed to do with a high school diploma? Every job application I’ve been skinning through recently says college, college, college”
“Well…” Ford taps at his chin. “Then why not go out for college?”
Okay, now he’s taking things too far.
“Pardon?” Stan mocks, because if Ford thinks that Stan’s going to willingly take four more years of classes than maybe he should be carted away to a loony bin.
“I’m serious!” Ford blushes. “Maybe not a high intensity school like West Coast Tech, but college is so much more freeing than high school, Stanley. It’s not class after class on subjects that other people tell you to take. It’s personalized. If you hate science class so much, you never have to take another science class again”
Ford’s blush darkens. “I know that school is a big drag and all, but if you asked me?” he averts his gaze. “I think you’d really benefit from business school. Charisma and social intelligence is the number one thing that big name businesses are looking for, and I know you’re filled to the brim with both. Ultimately it is your decision, but…” Ford fiddles with his thumbs. “Just…just consider it, okay?”
For a brief moment, Stan just wants to burst out into hysterical laughter. Ford’s been offered the opportunity of a lifetime at one of the best schools in the country, and he’s still taking the time to help out his good-for-nothing brother who’s been cheating off of his exams for the past ten years.
Instead he settles for a roll of his eyes. “Alright, Professor Poindexter, I’ll consider it”
Ford giggles at that, and for a few moments neither of them says anything, watching the waves gently lapping on the beach in the short distance. It’s a comfortable silence, a reassuring sort of feeling that Stan hasn’t felt in a long time.
The frantic beeping of Pa’s wristwatch interrupts them, and both boys flinch at the sound in unison. For a moment Stan is worried that Pa’s standing behind them having heard every word, but when he glances over at Ford, he sees him rolling up his shirt sleeve to reveal that he’s the one wearing the watch, and clicks the alarm off.
“Pa made me borrow it so I wouldn’t be late for the presentation with the school board” he rubs awkwardly at the back of his head. “I’ll probably give it back as soon as I get home tonight”
Stan smirks. “You still hate the sound of that thing too, huh?”
“I can still hear it in my nightmares,” Ford exaggerates, his eyes going wide, and the twins burst into laughter as they both stand from the swings and stretch their arms and legs to wake them up from sitting for so long.
Ford wipes at his eye as he fidgets with the wristwatch. “So…do you think you’re going to be okay?”
That in itself is a pretty loaded question that could take him all night to answer, but all things considering…
“Yeah,” Stan smiles. “I think I’ll be okay”
Ford smiles back, and gestures with his thumb towards the direction of the pawn shop. “Then I’m going to head home and get ready for my presentation. You coming?”
Stan shakes his head. “I think I’ll stay out here and just…watch the ocean for a little while longer”
Ford’s smile softens, but he doesn’t say anything else. He turns heel and walks back towards the house, and it feels as though a giant weight has just been lifted off of Stan’s chest. He glances back to watch Ford go, but finds comfort in the feeling that he feels nothing at all.
~~~
Nearly five hours later, Stan sits at home, watching television on the couch to pass the time. Just out of the corner of his eye he sees Ford slip into the kitchen and gently click the door closed. Stan shuts the TV off, and spins around on the couch to face his brother.
“Well?” Stan asks, though he knows he doesn’t even need to bother asking, given that Ford looks like he’s about to burst. With a shaking hand, Ford reaches into his pocket and pulls out a glinting white envelope.
If he’s trying to keep an air of mystery about it, he’s doing a really bad job, because all at once his composure breaks and the smile that spreads across his face looks as though it could burn out the sun.
“They loved me!” He shouts, excitedly pacing the floor. “They told me they’ve never seen anyone else like me!”
His smile is so contagious that it hurts.
Perhaps another day, in another timeline, Stan would take offense to Ford’s excitement to bounce off to the other end of the country without him. Perhaps he’d even lash out, or do something he would’ve immediately regretted.
But here and now, Stan couldn’t be happier for his brother if he tried.
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ordinaryschmuck · 3 years
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Why Samurai Jack is a Fan-Frickin’-Tastic Character
Salutations, random people on the internet who certainly won’t read this! I am an Ordinary Schmuck. I write stories and reviews and draw comics and cartoons.
And today, I’d like to introduce you to somebody:
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This is Samurai Jack, from the popular Cartoon Network series Samurai Jack. Jack is a rare case. Where most shows would have a cast of main, secondary, and recurring characters of varying sizes, Samurai Jack is a series that mostly follows its titular character on his own. Sure, occasionally, you'll see the Scottsman or Aku making an appearance once in a while. But for ninety-five percent of the series, it's entirely focused on Jack and whatever oddball bounty hunter he's forced to deal with for the next twenty-two minutes. This type of decision can be risky because without quality writing, strictly following the same character week after week could get boring real quick. Thankfully, Samurai Jack is a series that's packed to the brim with incredible writing and direction, making Jack himself a fan-frickin'-tastic character.
How is that possible? Well, let me count the ways.
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1. He’s the right type of overpowered
Jack knows almost every fighting style in the world and uses that knowledge to survive every bounty hunter, demon, and/or robot he faces every episode. On paper, this type of character could seem unbelievable given that he's just a mortal man, and even monotonous to know he always wins. But that's the thing: Even though Jack manages to almost always win every fight he's in, it's quickly explained why in the very first episode. Through a montage, we see Jack learning every fighting style from several teachers, each of them helping him prepare for the ultimate battle against Aku, an unspeakable evil. Through the simple act of showing us a few scenes of Jack learning a new skill, it's easy to understand why he's a difficult opponent to beat and easy to believe when he introduces another fighting style we haven't seen him use yet. Plus, while Jack's fighting is formidable, that doesn't make him--
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WRONG SHOW! But it's true.
Despite winning every episode, it is never an easy feat. Nearly every battle results in Jack getting beat up and torn apart (Or, his clothes do, anyway). When this happens, it makes the victory feel earned rather than easily given. Take his fight against the beetles in episode three, for example. All of his traps go off without a hitch, and he makes it out while standing upon a pile of his vanquished foes. However, during the fight, his armor got stripped away entirely, and he's now scratched up and covered in robot oil:
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That image alone proves that even though he’s winning, it doesn’t come easy for him. That remains a staple throughout most of the series, throwing in a few instances when he temporarily loses only to make his eventual victory all the sweeter. He may be overpowered, but at least it's still entertaining to watch regardless.
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2. He adapts quickly
A bit of background information to those who haven't the show (probably should have done this in the beginning, but live and learn, I guess): Jack is an ancient samurai that gets magically teleported to a future where his mortal nemesis rules the world. Now, Jack is forced into an environment vastly different from his own, and in turn, he's forced to deal with a lot of stuff he doesn't know. Most writers would take advantage of this type of predicament to make a ton of fish-out-of-water jokes as a way to poke fun at the idea of a samurai being in a futuristic "utopia" (Or, at least, in Aku's eyes, it's a utopia). Thankfully, the writers avoid that cliche. In fact, if my memory serves me right, there's only one fish-out-of-water joke in the entire series. Which I'm more than grateful for because having a character getting thrown off and confused by the world around him would have gotten old fast. But it's not just being in a future world that Jack quickly gets used to. It's also being in situations he's unfamiliar with. Whether it's learning to fit in with dance-crazed zombies or being turned into a chicken (yes, that happens), it doesn't take too long for Jack to figure out a way to get through his current crisis. It proves that even though Jack is a strong warrior in battle, he's also a strategic one who can't be so easily outsmarted.
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3. He plays off of everyone he encounters
Jack, in almost every sense of the word, is a straight man. Most of his humor comes from interacting with the bombastic temperaments of others due to his own behavior being so stoic and calm. The series accomplishes this feat by having the future world filled with colorful personalities, making almost every character the best comedic partner for Jack. Primarily through Aku and the Scottsman, who, as I mentioned before, are the only characters that make regular appearances. These are characters with personalities that clash with Jack's, what with Aku being bombastic and chaotic and the Scottsman being loud and crash. Every time Jack interacts with either of them, comedy almost always follows. A good thing too because while Jack can have his own humorous moments, it's better to pair a straight man with someone insane if you want the laughs to come frequently.
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4. He’s still a ton of fun himself!
That being said, Jack is still a riot when he gets to be. By and large, I'd say he has a dry sense of humor, often shining through when he interacts with someone carrying the chaos for the both of them. But, occasionally, there are moments when Jack lets his goofy side out, and it's always funny. They're rare, but that in itself is why they work. Because since Jack always acts so serious in this series, seeing him suddenly break that character results in a laugh because it's something we wouldn't expect from him. If he always acted like this, it wouldn't hit as hard as it would only just be his usual sense of humor. So seeing him smile like an idiot as he's waiting "for the magic to begin" causes me to bust a gut laughing each time.
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5. He lives despite tragedy
But not everything is all fun and games for our protagonist.
Jack has one goal in this series: Get back to the past and stop the future of Aku from happening. Several episodes make it clear how strenuous a task this could be, showing Jack briefly losing hope that he'll even complete it. Hell, a good chunk of the final season is him practically given up. He still fights to stop Aku's minions from wreaking havoc, but you can see that the light has left his eyes, and he is more than willing for it to end. But, despite how hard things get and how tragic his life can be, there is always a spark of hope that reminds him what he's fighting for and gives him a second wind to finish it. Even when he's at his lowest point, when everything is seemingly hopeless, Jack will always get back up to defeat Aku, no matter what timeline they're in. It is truly noble and shows just how much of a hero Jack is. In fact--
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6. He’s the definition of what a hero should be
At least, to me, he is.
What do I mean? Well, I always believe that a hero is a person who would do everything they can to do the right thing, refusing to let innocent people suffer no matter what the cost. Jack proves it in every episode, frequently the ones where he's inevitably screwed over by his own selflessness. He could easily finish his quest and finally get back to the past, but because it could mean that someone innocent would be badly affected by it, Jack always doubles back to save them. The best example is in the second episode of season two. Jack gets ahold of a fairy that he heard can grant him any wish that he wants, but it's trapped in this ball of energy and will never get out. Jack can just wish to go back to the past and stop Aku once and for all. He only needs to make one simple wish. And what does he wish for? The fairy's freedom.
Because that's who Jack is. He's not the guy who would bargain for the life of another, even if his quest is more important. You can argue all you want that if saving something as inconsequential as the fairy's life is pointless due to tragedies like it being preventable if Jack successfully goes back in time. But that doesn't matter to him. A life is a life, and Jack is not the person to trade it. He's a hero and a damn good one at that.
There are many reasons why Samurai Jack is a fantastic character, but the one above, and the others I've just listed, prove how he is a fan-frickin'-tastic character.
(Sidenote: Does it bother anyone else that, despite five full seasons, we've never known what his real name is? No? Just me? Ok.)
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chaoticevilbean · 4 years
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I have decided to write A story about a teenage Girl who ends up an Ambassador for the Terran Alliance after accidentally aiding in the Stopping of several global take-overs, three of Which were from cyborgs and AI, and four of which Were aliens that surrendered in Under a month.
It will be Weird, and it will Include:
- An attempt At world dominance by a mad Scientist and his robots. Bella (the name of The protagonist) and her group of Besties befriends the robots And they send the scientist to Jail while also aiding In reprogramming the bots To have free will.
- An attempt at World domination made by cyborgs Who are thwarted by Bella’s friend Jeoffe Screaming whenever he sees one. Not in fear. Just screaming. Many join. They Scream and scream and if A cyborg lands, they start to sing carols And camp songs. They just... do this. Jeoffe learned many Songs from Bella, which is her indirect Contribution to the thwarting, until she Finally joined her friend.
- AI’s try next. Bella’s smartphone has a Lot to say. And her sister. Bella sees a toaster Whose cord got stuck in a Fence while it was moving On new wheels, and she got it Free and helped train it to Properly use the wheels. People follow suit. The AI’s sort of Went “well, it seems humanity ain’t that bad” and stopped.
- A group of aliens Thwarted by the fact that they Can’t handle soundwaves well. They are very sensitive to Volume and Bella gets her friends to Hack into every speaker on a global Scale. The entire world Screams. And starts to sing Yogi Bear. The aliens surrender And start discussing terms of Allying.
- The next species thinks all songs Are war songs or Summoning songs. Bella and her friend Trinity end up Protecting government convoys together by Singing Yogi Bear whenever they see aliens. Since the others hear it, They join the two and simply sing loudly and do The motions so that they can terrify their Enemies.
- The third group is taken down By arts and crafts. Bella’s sister knits (with help) sweater armor and They use Nerf guns and Glitter and slime bombs to take Out the opposing forces. Glie-terr is a Weapon that covers One in a reflective dust and it Can suffocate, it can Cut sensitive skins, and it never comes off. Unless you’re human.
- The last invasion, they’re prepared for the Noise, and the songs, And the weird weapons. They decide to study The planet’s fauna so they Aren’t attacked by it and also so they can Possible figure out how Humans survived so long with them. Jeoffe, Bella, and a 19-year-old named Jeremy stowed away On a transport after Bella’s dog got Stolen. They got into The vents, studied the control room for a little, Then took out the Beings within, closed off communications And doors, got all the specimens Inside a transport, sent a message to the Fleet to return asap, set the autopilot to Leave once all transports were aboard, and Went back home. Then the transport returned As well via autopilot again. The aliens had been Tricked by three teenagers.
- All four alien Species become a part of The Terran Alliance, and Bella becomes the Ambassador for Them all.
- Because the education System has changed in Merica (Merica, not ‘murica or America) and also Worldwide, Bella actually has PhD’s.
- Also, since she’s a weirdo Surrounded by weirdos, she’s spent a lot of Time learning very obscure things and different Fighting styles, and she ate as many spices and Spicy food and bitter stuff as possible, And built up tolerances to poisons with Help from a professional, and She knows how to speak a lot of Languages and she just learned whatever her friends Or family suggested. Also, she used Tumblr for ideas once aliens Began invading. No way was she passing Up such an opportunity.
- There is a prank Involving dyed hair and social Status because Bella was sick of explaining things And decided to just make something up.
- The Intergalactic Alliance tried to say that the Terran Alliance was too New and humans Too young to join. Bella decided to educated Them on the number of wars humans have Had. Just telling them that Merica was founded because Of wars convinces them that Terrans are very Much ready to join.
- Bella gets assigned to An exploration group so that she Can find more allies and also learn About different planets. She calls Cptn Lo’k I. “Cap’n Loki”. They’re blue like A frost giant and they gets frustrated that she Calls them that (she took the time to describe human Pronouns and each crew member decided On ones for her To use so that translation was Easier for the adolescent human.
- Bella very much Enjoys telling about the specific Foods humans can’t eat, then eating them Herself. The others don’t dare Risk feeding another Terran those substances, but the Fact that she can.
- Befriending animals is taken To a whole other level. Bella rushes off the Ship to explore on a planet, and Returns at the designated time, perfectly unharmed...
With a three-headed canine, a serpent That can change from Scales to fur, and two brightly colored Primates. She refuses to let them be Sent away, hugging the serpent close.
Bella is no longer Allowed to be alone while Exploring.
She still brings Back new specimens as companions.
- Bella insists on learning all possible Alien languages. Eventually, She just doesn’t use a translator.
- Fire? To basically every Species: absolute danger unless properly Controlled in a laboratory. To Humans: their best friend besides pets. To Bella: sMoKe BoMbS and fIrEwOrKs and CaMpInG and a LoT oF rEaLlY fUn StUfF.
- Bella has an eidetic memory, making remembering every Special day in the calendar Really easy. Also, it’s incredibly Confusing to the other crew Members when she walks In like, “Happy National Dragon Day!” and “Happy Boxing Day!” and “Happy Bubble Wrap Appreciation Day!”
What the stillo is ‘bubble wrap’?
- If asked about Something that seems very strange, Often high-ranking officials will act like whatever it Is is true because Bella likes to Mess with other species when they are Condescending or she’s stressed or other reasons. And it’s Not like she does it to be Mean (unless they’re mean). She just told Cap’n Loki that as a Female Terran, she requires a monthly Day off from any required meetings or Tasks so she doesn’t become Violent. And told Technician Fis’mo that Terrans often have parties Specifically to make hit lists (based off Sleepovers). Harmless misinformation, but terrifying All the same.
~if ya wanna, add some more ideas, cuz I’m gonna anyways~
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