Astarion: "You know, I never pictured myself as a hero. Never thought I'd be the one they toast for saving so many lives. And now that I'm here... I hate it. This is awful."
Elayne: "It's not that bad. Think of all the goblins you've killed."
Astarion: "True. That was fun. Still, I would've liked more for my trouble than a pat on the head and vinegar for wine."
---
Astarion is over here pouting over doing a good deed, and Elayne swoops in to help reassure him by essentially saying "Chin up! Remember the fun you've had killing those goblins?" He perks up a little after hearing that. Despite their differences in morality, at least at this point, they can at least agree on how fun a little chaos can be.
Does anyone else find it odd that Astarion is drinking wine when he can't even taste it, especially after when it's revealed he's a vampire? Like, dude, who are you trying to convince here? The tieflings? Like they're going to pay attention if you're drinking or not? 🤨
You think the tieflings are going to be watching him after they just went through hell and back and celebrating that they get to live another day, that they're going to be paying attention to one person like "The elf over there... he's not drinking? What's wrong with him? Is he...a VAMPIRE? Get him!"
No. I highly doubt that.
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emizel tucker and shilo bathroy are sosoososos perfect in my mind. not like, morally, yknow, but they are two perfect characters to compliment each other.
emizel's a kid raised on the streets of LA by his gang brothers and he forced his way up the ranks by being brutal and unforgiving and not showing weakness. he's powerful because he refuses to doubt his own capabilities, and pushes himself past what he should be capable of, because he's cocksure and drowning in hubris. and then he gets turned into a vampire and all of the sudden he's in the middle of a brand new society and it runs on violence. and emizel knows violence! he's good at violence! literally this is all he's ever known!!! he's got this, he thinks he understands how to climb the ranks but in reality, he doesn't get it. at all. vampire society is this strange mix of posh old money and a violent underbelly and to really survive in it you have to manage both ends, but emizel only knows the violent underbelly.
and then shilo. shilo, who only knows the opposite: the grand old money, the power, the manipulation. and he's okay it at- he's better at it than he thinks he is, and he's way out of his depth when it comes to vampire LA. he grew up sheltered from the violence of vampirism- sure, death isn't unfamiliar to him but the really gritty stuff, the blood, even the point of not being able to feed without it being served to him has been withheld. but he knows, theoretically, how vampires are supposed to work. he's not at all confident in himself which is such a detriment because he is a manipulative little shit at his core, and if he wasn't so overwhelmed all the time he'd be pretty good at the politics thing. he's smart! he's personable! the reason he fails in LA like he does is the fact he doesn't understand the violence-
which is where emizel comes in.
they are literally perfect for each other. twin brothers, two equal sides of this fucked up vampire world, and if they worked together (and with arthur, i think arthur is key here for them not losing their humanity, y'know) i 100% believe they could take over the fucking world.
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arthur knows there is something to be said of the way a man wears his scars.
his father wears his, an angry silver cord right above his eyebrow, with defiant pride. time and time again, he has seen a visiting noble alight their gaze on the mar, and his father's bellicose stare in return, a silent war between them. i have survived this, the king would say without words. i will survive you.
on his father's men, a constellation of pink, raised flesh-- a rope of gnarled skin on sir bedivere's left arm from the slice of a blade; a thick, white tear in the fabric of ector's neck. when arthur's young, he sits by fires and listens to the tales of bandits, beasts, and brethren who leave the marks on the warriors who arthur loves.
and, in time, they come to arthur. a snaking vine on arthur's right hip. a thin slice along his left bicep. none of them grow angry and purple the way he's seen after the battle dust settles. he's lucky, in that regard, that all his settle into the skin like they belong there. a man who wears his scars not without pride, but whose scars wear him with the same reverence.
his new knights collect them with the same wonder arthur first collected his. a memory of a battle well fought. a time where death reached out its hand and missed. i have survived this. i will survive you.
but they never come to merlin.
at first, when he's young and naive to all the things merlin has done for him, it stands to reason that merlin is never scarred. he doesn't do anything. later, when the truth outs, arthur knows that was as foolish a thought as trusting his father blindly.
merlin fights alongside him, now, in their older years. he watches as blade lunges, as arrow pierces, as spear aims-- and yet, merlin walks away from battle without a scratch. surely, arthur thinks, merlin has just been lucky. maybe his scars are like arthur's-- not quite as visible as his father's, as his men's. hidden underneath cloth and armour.
merlin shares his battlefield, his kingdom, and-- on the luckiest night of arthur's life-- decides to share his bed, too.
it's after arthur has run his hands over every inch merlin will allow him that he realises. not once, in the fog of their union, did arthur's fingers ever stumble over raised skin, divots or grooves.
"what's wrong?" merlin asks, his voice quiet, his lips pressed to where their hands are joined. "tell me if you're about to kick me out of your bed, at least, so i can figure out how i am going to walk after all that."
it's a joke to mask how scared merlin must feel. this is a new development, though one as easy as breath, as predictable as the sun rising in the sky. arthur will tell him that later. for now, though--
"you promised," he whispers into merlin's neck, "to keep nothing more from me."
merlin frowns, his brows drawn together. "i haven't? i mean, if you're talking about my affections, surely we can both admit that yours were the more hidden--"
arthur places a hand over the groove of a lower rib. "here," he says, "is where you were almost run through by bandits, a few seasons ago." his fingers trail down to a hip. "here, you intervened in my fight with some beast or another, and i had to watch gaius give you stitches. and here--"
merlin stops his hand, sucks in a breath. "arthur."
"did you use magic to heal?" arthur finds he isn't angry, not in the way he expects. "i understand, merlin. you had to explain away so much; it would make sense--"
"it's a glamour," merlin admits in the space between his words.
arthur frowns. "a glamour."
merlin can only nod.
arthur knows what the word means, sort of, from the magical instruction and history merlin has given him in the time past their-- arthur's-- new found knowledge of their bond. but glamours, as merlin had explained, are oft for the use of enchantment, so as to make one's romantic interest view them as beautiful--
oh.
he rolls merlin onto his back.
"show me." it is a plea more than a command. it is not from merlin's king, but rather, arthur hopes, his heart.
merlin sighs. his eyes glow gold.
like roots spreading through the earth, a tide rippling over sand, his appearance changes. angry pink gnarls. fine, silver cuts. the faint shadow of where a burn once sat. they litter merlin's pale skin, old and new, in places arthur never could have imagined.
he knows his face must show something that makes merlin turn away from him. with a shaking hand, he turns merlin's chin back to him.
"tell me one thing," arthur says. it is a command, now. "were these all for me?"
there is no air in the room as merlin nods.
slowly, arthur draws in breath. he leans down, then, and presses his lips to one at the base of merlin's neck.
"then," he starts, shakily, "this is mine." another kiss, to his ribs, the puckered flesh of a sword wound. "this is mine." to his wrist, where chains must have sat at the behest of his father. "this is mine," and he's choking up, now.
merlin's trembling underneath him, a quaking branch in the wind. arthur spreads his fingers over merlin's heart, takes its beat in his palm, and looks him in his eyes.
"i will love everything you show me," arthur breathes, a promise, "because it is mine."
"as am i," merlin promises back. "as am i."
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