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stormyoceans · 9 months

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monica im gonna need you to verbalise what the birthday scene did to you because i've been on the lookout for your reaction.. i know youre barely human rn so whenever you feel like it ofc 🥰

PETRI IT'S SO VERY SWEET OF YOU TO WANT TO KNOW MY REACTION TO THE MOST INSANE 20 MINUTES OF TELEVISION EVER PUT TO FILM BUT IM AFRAID I WON'T EVER BE MENTALLY FIT ENOUGH TO PUT INTO WORDS THE AMOUNT OF PAIN SUFFERING TORMENT AGONY ANGUISH SADNESS DESPAIR DEVASTATION DESPONDENCY HEARTBREAK AND DIVINE WRATH I WENT THROUGH WATCHING THAT ENTIRE SCENE LIKE I WAS GENUINELY WHITE KNUCKLING MY WAY THROUGH IT JUST GNAWING ON FURNITURE TO PREVENT MYSELF FROM GOING ON A KILLING SPREE AND PETROL BOMBING THE GMMTV HEADQUARTERS

i also feel like most people came out of the episode bawling their eyes out for mork and wanting to talk about him, and of course im no different, but at the same time im literally genuinely truly sincerely honest to god fr not kidding when i tell you i could spend the rest of my life talking about day and how good (and underrated) of a character he is. the frankly insane amount of thoughts and feelings i have about him basically overshadowed everything else EXCEPT FOR THE MURDEROUS RAGE I FELT TOWARDS AUGUST. and like.. the thing i appreciate the most about p’aof’s characters is that they’re all incredibly complex and nuanced, there are no heroes and no villains in his stories (despite what night says), so i do think that august cares about day and didn’t have any malicious intent, but the road to hell is paved with good intentions and august’s ones were wrapped up in so much ableism and selfishness since the very beginning, because he never really tried to understand day or think about what would actually make day happy, he just tried to lessen his own guilt for all the times he made day wait hours for him to show up, for all the matches he made them lose because his temper flared up, for all the forgotten birthdays, for not returning day’s feelings. i don’t want to hate august but the pity he feels for day and the guilt that stemmed from it ended up making day’s deepest fear come true and hurting him in ways august can’t even imagine AND IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY

mork’s anger was so relatable because mork, just like the audience, knows. he’s the only one who knows, not just about day’s heartbreak, but also about august’s words cutting much deeper than a simple rejection. this is exacly the reason day isolated himself and begged his mom not to tell anyone about him losing his sight, and the worst part is that august said all that to mork as if day wasn’t even there, as if he was invisible. honestly i could write a whole other post just about this scene and mork’s anger and the tear running down mork’s cheek not for himself but for day and day taking mork’s hand to stop him from hurting august and mork LETTING HIM and the hug but im sure other people already did better than i ever could and this is already getting way too long so let’s just say that the mental health crisis intervention team that’s always in the room with me when i watch this show had their hands full trying to sedate me (and to think that this was the better outcome too like.. imagine if mork hadn't come back. imagine if august had just walked away leaving day alone with no explanation whatsoever and no way of getting home by himself. KILLING AND MAIMING AND BITING AND TEARING AND RIPPING AND CLAWING AND STABBING AND PUNCHING AND KICKING AND MURDERING)

this mess with august is also making me both appreciate and hurt for day and gee’s friendship because she’s the only person from day’s past who isn’t treating him any differently and who is genuinely trying to understand him, and day TRUSTED her, when he needed someone and mork wasn’t there she is the one he called out for, which is HUGE, but he still isn’t ready to fully open up to her and you can tell this is hurting gee a little because she just wants to be there for him, especially after not being able to for an entire year. unlike everyone else, tho, she respects day’s boundaries and is gonna wait for him to come to her when he’s ready, so it pains me to think that what happened with august might push day towards isolation again (like i know mork isn’t gonna let that happen, but i think day is gonna have a hard time hanging out with other people again, at least for a while) WHICH IS WHY I NEED GEE TO DO WHAT DAY STOPPED MORK FROM DOING AND SLAP SOME SENSE INTO AUGUST

AND OKAY LIKE LET’S TALK ABOUT MORKDAY EVEN IF THINKING ABOUT THEM FOR TOO LONG MAKES ME WANT TO THROW MY WHOLE ASS SELF DOWN A WELL AND DROWN IN 5 CM OF WATER AND ALSO AS WE’VE ALREADY ESTABLISHED IM CLEARLY VERY BIASED TOWARDS DAY EVEN IF I DO TRY TO BE AS OBJECTIVE AS POSSIBLE BUT ALSO LISTEN. people out there blaming day for not falling at mork’s feet right away and hurting mork’s feelings by preferring august (which is not entirely true btw) can meet me in the pit and i don’t wanna get into this here since im just rambling and digressing from what you originally asked way too much, but the point is. people look at this as if emotions are completely clear cut and day can’t both have residual feelings for august and some blooming ones for mork that he isn’t fully aware of, and also everyone seems to forget that day can’t see and mork is his caretaker and he has no idea how much of mork being nice to him is mork actually liking him or mork just doing his job. all of this to say that MY BOY DAY WAS THRILLED AT THE IDEA OF SPENDING HIS BIRTHDAY WITH MORK OKAY??????? HE WAS HAPPY AND EXCITED AND GIFTED MORK HIS FAVORITE PERFUME AFTER SPRAYING IT ON HIM (i could act like a 12 years old and make a joke about day spraying himself on mork since the name of the perfume is ‘day time’ but i won’t because im better than that) [no im not] AND COMPLETELY FORGOT ABOUT EVER KNOWING SOMEONE NAMED AUGUST. so to hear mork say that he went there as a matchmaker probably was yet another thing that confused day so much about mork’s intentions (and it also had me on the floor recreating the collective wailing scene from midsommar but that’s a different matter)

and like don’t get me wrong, i have no doubts that letting day go with august was probably one of the hardest most painful things mork ever had to do and that the only reason he was actually able to go through with it is because he thought that august was where day’s happiness laid. it was also extremely painful to see mork alone in the background throughout the entire episode, unsure of where he stands in day’s life and feeling like he has no right to claim a place next to him, and day definitely had some part in making him feel like that but i also think that mork was so wrapped up in his own emotions (understandably so) that he didn’t really listen to all the times day was asking him to stay. "not a boss. let's just say im a friend", "why didn't you join us for dinner?", "so will you tell me now what you're going as if not my caretaker?". day may not be sure of his own feelings or how to define his relationship with mork, but he does know that mork belongs right next to him, and seeing day looking for mork and not finding him was just as painful as mork once again not being able to give the damn sunflower to day LIKE SERIOUSLY HOW MANY MORE SUNFLOWERS ARE WE GOING TO GO THROUGH BEFORE IT FINALLY GETS TO DAY STOP THIS MADNESS

AND DON’T EVEN LET ME GET STARTED ON THE SYMBOLISM OF IT ALL AND HOW - JUST LIKE AT THE BEGINNING THEY BOTH WERE THE UNHAPPY PRINCE AND THE UNTAMED FOX IN NEED OF A FRIEND WHO WOULD TAKE THE TIME AND EFFORT TO UNDERSTAND -THEY NOW BOTH ARE THE SUN AND THE SUNFLOWER CHASING THE LIGHT THAT MAKES IT VISIBLE BECAUSE THEY ARE THE ONLY ONES WHO CAN TRULY SEE EACH OTHER AND HOW ALL OF THIS TIES WITH THE KISS HAPPENING AS THE SUN RISES OR I WILL START MAKING RABIS-RIDDLED CREATURE NOISES

im very likely forgetting so many things i wanted to say and that are worth mentioning but this already enough of a mess and i’ve also reached that point of insanity where i need to go meditate in a sensory deprivation chamber to come down from the sheer manic energies that thinking about this show has me going on SO. let’s just leave it at that

IN CONCLUSION. RIP ME

#NOT A SINGLE COHERENT THOUGHT FOUND THIS IS BASICALLY JUST STREAM OF CONSCIOUSNESS AT ITS WORSE #AND THIS FRIENDS IS WHY YOU SHOULD NEVER LET ME TALK ABOUT ANY JIMMYSEA/VICE VERSA/LAST TWILIGHT RELATED MATTER #CAN I APOLOGIZE FOR THIS UNSUBSTANTIAL MESS NOW #last twilight the series #petri 🩵#m: ask

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just-antithings · 1 year

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I’m in a fandom that’s barely hanging on by a thread and I don’t know if I should be glad or not. Because antis would definitely find their way in if it was bigger

It’s an otome game/anime adaption (called Dance with Devils) where 5 of the 6 love interests want to use the main character to get to a macguffin. The only one who doesn’t is her brother (technically cousin, but they both think of each others as siblings. So much so that the guy gets religious guilt over it and dedicates his entire life to protecting her)

Love interest A kidnaps and endangers her in an attempt to show how cool he is and “what she’s missing out on”. Guy B mentally torments her - half to uncover leads to the macguffin, half because he likes it and sees nothing wrong with it, then tries to kill her best friend. Guy C has an entire song about how he wants to trap her as his pet, fabricates a scenario where she would be in danger, then pretends to save her to gain her trust. Everyone except the brother is a demon, so big age difference

But despite all that, the series has a cute romantic tone and has more plot/characters besides the romance. So I can easily see how antis would watch it and just hate on the rest (especially the incest)

I’m also (mildly) worried that if it gets bigger, there’s gonna be claims of "queerbaiting" with the way fandoms are these days. Three of the love interests can be read as having a thing TM. A and B constantly argue like a married couple, C’s main characteristic is that he’s a masochist and riles these two up for attention (and when he doesn’t, they still bully him). So queerbaiting because they’re endgame with a girl, but "toxic mlm" because they never get along

I don’t really know if this fits the blog. Feel free to delete it, I just got a little too worked up over imaginary situations and wanted to tell my woes

#mod erin #ask #posted without comment #bullying mention #incest mention #kidnapping mention

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frenchgremlim1808 · 2 years

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Stop justifying Billy attitude.

Introduction

This is a follow up post to my harringr**ve has much more follower than lumax lucas and max. You can find it here

Okay i made a promise, so today i’m gonna fulfill it. So i’m gonna say somethings that i didn’t think was controversial. Billy hargrove actions are inexcusable and irredeemable, he would have never have a redemption if he lived, he would have stayed an horrible asshole whatever would have happened. The only point in time where he could have become better is nonexistent, because he’s dead. So stop acting like he is a good person.

Now i am forced to explain cause it seems some idiot actually thinks that this character whose whole purpose was to pose a human threat to the cast and represent the bigoted views of the 80′s is in a fact sad boy who just needed a redemption.

Before i start just wanna clarify, liking billy has a character, liking how his purpose in the story was fulfilled or his complexity doesn’t make you a bad person. Not at all. I personally think that billy is a very well written character well fitted into the story and honestly very interesting way to show the effect of abuse and how abuse can change a person at a young age.

I’m gonna take every argument i saw and break it down for you.

1. Billy action are excusable he was a victim of abuse, so he continue the cycle of abuse, it’s not his fault !

Okay first do you think the same things to serial killer who also got abused by their parents. Is the fact that they were abused change anythings to the fact that they killed innocent people out of pure psychopathy and own twisted pleasure. Of course you don’t because that’ absolutely insane and if you actually think that go see a psychiatrist.

“But op you can’t compare serial killers with billy all billy did was being mean to his sister’s friends” First of if you think he was just being mean to lucas/max, you’re either blind, or absolutely in denial. Billy tried to roll over lucas and co, burned a cat alive abused mentally max, menaced to kill lucas a child and steve, and even after his death still torment her so much that it pushing her toward suicadal thoughts. Second, okay you doesn’t like my comparisons then let’s make another. Do you think that my grandma who neglected and abused my mother out of pure hate for her simple existence in this world excusable in anyway because her childhood was bad. Because her childhood was kinda bad she now has the pass to abuse her kids and put permanent marks in their life of self hatred and emotional disability. No she will never get that pass, never because her actions may come from past abuse, but it doesn’t change the fact that her actions ruined her children's self worth and view on the world. She continued the cycle of abuse while could have stopped it, she could have stopped it and given the chance to her kids that she didn’t get. But no she continued what her own parent’s did to her to her children’s. But my mom stopped it she stopped the cycle of abuse, by loving and taking care of me just like any mother should. She made mistake along the way but in the end she did the best she could for me.

My grandma actions are not excusable, but in a way understandable. She wasn’t strong enough to stop the cycle of abuse. Billy is the exact same. Billy actions are not excusable, in any way, but understandable.

2. “But if he had a good circle like Jonathan had, he wouldn’t turned like that”

Of course the Jonathan/ billy comparison. It’s true they have a lot in common. Physically abusive dad and an abused siblings. But i’m gonna express something real quick. What circle ? Like actually what circle. His anxiety driven mom ? His abused brother? Oh no his nonexistent friends who totally helped him not be an asshole. Jonathan didn’t have a circle he was alone against his dad. But still he didn’t decide to abuse Will, out of pure hatred towards the world. Having a circle doesn't mean your gonna be a good person, and not having one doesn’t automatically means you are gonna be an asshole. A good circle can help but in the end it’s all about inner strength. We really never talk about that but Jonathan in my eyes is an extremely strong character. He was capable of not only surviving his father abuse and fly over it, but also becoming even more full of love for his brother and mother. He could have been just like billy, fallen into the deep end where no forgiveness is acceptable but no he fought against all of his father influence and learned from his abuse that he will never ever forgive him nor become like him. He will never forgive the abuser.

And also if you wanna do comparisons let’s make a simple one. El has been abused her almost her whole life. Papa manipulated her. Even when he wasn’t with her he always had a certain control over her. In episode 8, Eleven has a choice forgiving the man who abused her or not doing that. She didn’t choose to forgive him, no she knew that in the end even with his kind words there was foul poison inside. A man who loved her wouldn’t have hurted her the way he did. A man who loved her wouldn’t have still tried to manipulate her. She knew deep down that whatever her heart could feel, he didn’t love her and he didn’t deserve forgiveness. She will never forgive the abuser. Pretty much everyone agreed with eleven choice. So why with billy is it different when he too abused max. Oh yes i forget he an conventionally attractive guy so you absolutely forget every action he did just because you simp for dacre. You know what, simp whenever you want for dacre, he’s a conventionally attractive white dude. But for the love of god stop confusing the actor with his character. Just because you think dacre is cute or whatever doesn't mean you have to act like his character did nothing wrong. HE’S A RACIST PIECE OF SHIT STOP PRETENDING LIKE HE ISN’T.

3.”Stop saying he’s a horrible person, that’s literally victim blaming him for his action”

Ooh, so saying that billy hargrove is an horrible person because he abused, threatened to death a child and burned a cat alive is victim blaming? I am currently blaming a victim ? You know what’s victim blaming, getting mad at Max for admitting that she hated billy and wished he died while he made her life a living hell. Victim blaming is also getting mad at Joyce for not being able to stand against loonie. It can also be blaming Jonathan for wanting to keep his job because his family is poor. That’s victim blaming. Billy is a victim of abuse true but like i said does it change any action he did ? In the situation i told was he a victim ? No he’s an abuser. Billy is an abuser. He may have been a victim but now he’s an abuser. He became an abuser the moment he decided to hurt max out of pure hate. When billy was young, he wasn’t an abuser, he was just a kid whose mother disappeared. He was just a victim; but when he became older he became an abuser. You can fell pity for the young abused kid who lost his mother, but you can’t feel pity for a freaking adult man who hurt 13 years old kids out of pure hate. Now all can fell for him is the pure feeling that he is a pathetic man who felt better by bullying thirteens years old.

4. “Leave us to relate to a character who’s a queer coded abuse victim, we can just relate to his struggles”

I have some words, Look one minute at the cast, right here.

So you wanna relate to an abuse victim who is queer coded and not racist nor abusive, will is there. You wanna relate to morally grey character who start of as a bad person but become better with time , Steve exist. Literally you have so many options; An abuse victim ( half of the stranger things cast), start of not that great (Steve/ Eddie/ hopper), Queer/queer coded ( will,mike,robin,jonathan etc). You can pick anyone, literally anyone but you choose billy hargrove, Billy out of all them. Stop making a plea to yourself.

5.”The reasons we like billy is the fact that he could have had a redemption, we just want the best for him”

Stop it, like stop it right now. What redemption ? Billy dead. He’s fucking dead. So if i understand you like this character only for the non-existant version that you made up in your mind. You solely like a character because of a fanon version babygirlfied version of the character. Well that explain everything now. The reason why billy hargrove fan love him is only fueled by their own little fantasy world which doesn’t exist. Billy is dead he was never made to have a redemption. the writers decided to kill him for a reason. He was more of a plot point than an actual good person in season 3. And like do you actually think that if he lived he would have been a good person. Even if i don’t know got like therapy or something and by magic it worked would it have stopped him of being racist. No it wouldn’t. Do you want a little definition of racism

“Racism is the belief that groups of humans posses different behavioral traits corresponding to inherited attributes and can be dived on the superiority of one race over another” Source Wikipedia

Racism is inherently the sentiment that some skin colors are superior than other. Racism is also putting stereotype on a certain ethnicity . It can manifest in a fear toward that ethnicity based on stereotypes.

Feeling superior. Billy hargrove feels superior to lucas because of skin color. He feel like his skin color is superior to poc skin color. I’m gonna ask a question, did you ever see in your life an extreme racist suddenly change and realized the error of his ways. Maybe it has already happened but it doesn’t change the fact that is rare. “But op billy isn’t an extreme racism it was just mild” No Billy racism isn’t mild. He tried to run over kids, and threatened of death a child. And even if his racism was mild it doesn’t change anything, He a racist in the 80 s. You think that him going to like therapy would change his racism especially in the 80 s.“But he wouldn’t have killed Lucas, he was just threatening him” Oh he JUST threatened of child of death, nothings wrong there. And euh... If Steve didn’t protect Lucas what would have happened you think. He would have JUST beaten the crap of him. I’m personally a poc, to know that some white ass 13 years old excuse the racism of billy just like we are the one overacting in this situation. Your a poc and your a billy fan, i literally don’t give a shit. That doesn’t change that he’s an abuser. Billy issues as a person doesn’t just come from his blatant racism.

6. But the show clearly want us to understand he wasn't bad, look at max grief.

Max grief billy, in a way she feels responsible for his death. Sometimes she may wish that she died in his place. But in no way is it cause she realized she liked him or something. Max is grieving because of regret. She never loved billy, she hated him. He made her life a living hell. But she feels like it’s her fault he died. She grieving a human being who died a horrible death in front of her. In her monologue she said it she wished he died. Grieving a bad person who has hurt you doesn’t mean you loved them. It’s a normal human reaction. Their relationship was complicated. Max never wanted the two of them to be this. All she would have wanted is to gain just some peace she got that peace but in her head that this newfound peace killed her step brother. Max is a nuanced character, she make bad decisions and sometime think things that aren’t true, grief and depression swallow her whole. Compared what billy fans think many of the stranger thing cast is extremely nuanced.The show isn’t trying to to make us understand he wasn’t bad, their showing that their relationship was extremely complicated.

And anyway they wouldn’t make max forgive Billy when one of the core moral of stranger things is against that.

“Never forgive the abuser”

Will and Jonathan will never forgive their father, Joyce will never forgive loonie,Eleven will never forgive pap and max won’t forgive Billy. Just like billy shouldn’t forgive Neil max will not forgive billy. And that’s why billy would have never been redeemed.

Just before i reach my conclusion i’m just gonna state some things:

-The Billy and Karen affair is still one of the most uncomfortable things that happened in the show, and Billy clearly isn’t at fault, Karen shouldn’t flirt with a young boy like him, she could literally be his mom. And technically its wasn’t illegal since billy was 18 at the moment ( if in america; in Indiana at that time the legal age of maturity is even 18, if it’s not, and in fact 21.... My opinion of Karen will decline... a lot.) but still weird as heck.

- I will admit that i too saw some queer coding in billy character, i could completely see the queer coding but i’m pretty sure it’s just dacre having good chemistry with joe. And even if he was queer wouldn’t change that he was a racist and and abuser so....

-While i do think that we should take in count actors views of their characters, Dacre saying that billy wasn’t racist was awfully wrong ,even Caleb said it billy is racist. But really it’s not a reason to cancel dacre or caleb or anyone. Actually don’t cancel anyone please.Cancel culture is one of the most idiotic things we have on the internet right now, and it would be amazing to just stop with that.

-I would say that the only reason most of the billy hate community can act sometimes hysterical is mainly because the billy stans can sometime be so ridiculous and the delusional ones in the conversation. Instead of accepting the fact that they clearly just wanna fuck dacre which is i guess understandable, they use Steve as a scapegoat. Just like back in time in the undertale fandom ( bad memories....) people shipped sans and frisk while using frisk, a child, as a self insert for them self.

Conclusion:

Just like the Wheelers, Papa, troy,Angela, Jason, the town of hawking in general billy is an indicator of the time period. The mentality of small town and the discrimination that minorities could face there. Stranger is all about following outcast of societies, freaks. Billy doesn’t follow that definition, and that’s why he’s not a main character. Billy is an incredible character who clearly is complex and has multiple layers. While he is a great character for his purpose as an antagonist, he should have never been idolized by so many people. Billy is not a good person, nor a character who as made to be loved. Billy was made for you to wish him to hate him, then gain pity, then realize he is a very grey character, who a complex deconstruct of toxic masculinity and the 80 s mentality.

And i will conclude by the fact that while this post was made to get some thought out of my head and kinda clear my absolute desperation at the billy stans naivety. It is also to i hope help some young peeps understand that billy hargrove isn’t a character who you should stan, and maybe wake them up a little. Anyone can be misguided, so that’s why i hope that if a billy stans is reading this you understand why most of the fandom dislike him a lot.

Also if your an ex billy stan say to me in comments what made you change ways.

Anyway spend 4 days on this shit, peace out love you all.

#byler #anti billy hargrove #anti harringrove #the byers #jonathan byers #max mayfield #lucas sinclair #lucas sinclair supremacy #byers supremacy #also as a poc i think i deserve to get mad that people simp for a racist #tw abuse #tw racism #well after all we are forced when talking about b**ly

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msclaritea · 11 months

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‘Bridgerton’s Ruby Barker Calls Out Netflix & Shondaland After Suffering “Psychotic Breaks” – Deadline

Ruby Barker is opening up about her experience on Bridgerton and calling out Netflix and Shondaland for not being more supportive during what she calls “psychotic breaks.”

“When I went into hospital a week after shooting Bridgerton Season One it was really covered up and kept on the down-low because the show was going to be coming out,” Barker said during an appearance on the LOAF Podcast. “During filming I was deteriorating. It was a really tormenting place for me to be because my character was very alienated, very ostracized, on her own under these horrible circumstances.”

She continued, “Not a single person from Netflix, not a single person from Shondaland since I have had two psychotic breaks from that show have even contacted me or even emailed me to ask if I’m okay or if I would benefit from any sort of aftercare or support. Nobody.”

Barker played the role of Marina in the first two seasons of the drama series. Marina was a controversial woman in the series following a pregnancy scandal. In real life, Barker was facing mental health issues due to the show.

Barker explained that a lot of things were happening at the same time when the show was set to premiere adding, “My life was changing drastically overnight and yet there was still no support and there still hasn’t been any support all that time. So I was trying really really hard to act like it was okay and that I could work and that it wasn’t a problem.”

“It’s almost like I had this metaphorical invisible gun to my head to sell this show because this show is bubbly and fun. I don’t wanna come out and poo-poo on that because then I might never work again!” she added.

Bridgerton is a drama series on Netflix created by Chris Von Dusen and based on the book series of the same name by Julia Quinn. Shonda Rhimes’ Shondaland produces the show for the streamer

Watch Barker’s full interview in the video posted below.

youtube

Just call her Kimberly Featherington.

Kim Kardashian made her Bridgerton super fan status known at the end of March, just before Regé-Jean Page announced his exit from the Netflix drama. But as it turns out, she's had more of an impact on the show than she ever realized.

Bridgerton star and Kardashian super fan Nicola Coughlan, who plays Penelope Featherington/Lady Whistledown, revealed on Twitter that she and her TV sisters here highly influenced by Kim and her real-life sisters.

"As the world's number one Bridgerton stan does Kim Kardashian know that the Kardashians were a massive inspiration for the Featheringtons and we talked about them all the time during our fittings?" Nicola tweeted. "Because I feel like she should know this."

Kim soon responded, with a very reasonable number of exclamation marks.

"WHAT?!?! I am freaking out!!!!!!" she responded. "This tweet was sent to me on my Bridgerton group chat! Can I please come to a fitting?!?! It would make my whole life!!!!!! I love you Lady W!!!"

According to other interviews, they knew damn well on the Bridgerton series that Barker has issues she was dealing with. But see, when you're dealing with the Church of Scientology, you're not likely to get much help, especially if torturing a young woman on set was the whole point.

Exactly what kind of person IS Shonda Rhimes, to go along with depravity such as this? Netflix mimicked the Kardashian women and their favorite hobby of latching onto black men, leeching off of them and leaving them mentally in jeopardy.

This makes two toxic, embedded stories of real people and their personal lives in Bridgerton.

#Youtube #Netflix #Hollywood is deliberately putting sctors abd sctresses in mentally upsetting situations #Church of Scientology #Shonda Rhimes #Ruby Barker #Isolated on Bridgerton set #Kardashians #Soul Sucking Bitches #Netflix is steeped in Satanism #American Horror Story #Has low ratings but they keep showing it and even put Kim Kardashian in it #Netflix IS Satsnic #benedict cumberbatch #Sophie Hunter #EVEN WORSE IS FINDING OUT THAT THE NBA JUST PARTNERED WITH THAT PSYCHOPATH KIM KARDASHIAN!!

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22degreehalo · 10 months

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Okay so a LOT of people have responded to my Barbie post so I really should be reading through all that first (but scawy) but I finally put something into words in my head

Every single man in the Barbie movie is a comic relief character. A pitiable, at least slightly pathetic, idiot.

Now. That is exactly the sort of thing that conservative commentators would point to to say that the movie hates men. And the Barbie fan's response, of course, would be that men deserve to be ridiculed, and that the movie isn't coddling them, and that men are acting like whiny babies for not being taken seriously when women never get that.

But I have the opposite take. The men all fit into that 'loveable himbo bumbling dad' type archetype. The relatable ordinary everyday man. The dummy who somehow manages to bag a hyper-competent 10/10 girlfriend in every Adam Sandler movie.

Yes, in many ways the idea of men having emotions is mocked; but also, the men get to be funny. There's a reason everyone posts memes about Ken and Kenergy and stuff over anything Barbie says. He's the fun one!

In that sense... the movie doesn't feel like it's reversing or parodying or commentating on anything at all. It's just bog standard gender roles in television: women are Closer To Earth and don't need to change much, but are pretty static and boring, while men are weird and funny and likeable and changeable, able to be bad but able to be redeemed, at the cost of having their more nuanced and sensitive emotions cheapened.

I wondered if it was meant to relate to the commentary at the end: that women HAVE to be perfect, and aren't allowed to make mistakes and be forgiven. But then in that case... why don't the women get to be funny, too? To anywhere near the same degree? Why doesn't the Barbie movie show us a silly, ridiculous, loveable himbo of a woman?

Why doesn't any woman actually get to do bad things and have them taken seriously? They complain about having to act perfect all the time... but are they not? When do we actually see those faults and failures, aside from as a result of 'burdened by the expectations of society' which of course is actually society's fault and not theirs? Barbie complains in the end about not really being good at anything, and that's good! But she still doesn't seem bad at anything, either. And nobody ever so much as implies that the way she treated those societally considered Lesser to her was actually pretty shitty.

The biggest difference between the way we portray women vs men in media, to me, is the idea of internal conflict and change. Women tend to just exist as they are, only impacted by external forces. They don't make conscious decisions to do things, or have their minds change, or grow into something different. They just ARE, flat characters.

Men, meanwhile, get to be tormented. Get to decide to work harder and then ultimately prove themselves. Get to be tempted by bad people, and make bad decisions, but ultimately show that they are capable of trying and working hard and doing better. It's not so much that men are allowed to be bad, as that men are allowed to consist of multitudes. Women usually just have to be one thing, and that's it.

And who is it who changes the most over the course of the movie? Who gets the big internal shift? Who has their understanding of reality challenged, and is affected by it, and makes decisions based on that, and faces the consequences of those decisions, and then ultimately decides to reverse things? It's Ken. It's just Ken.

I don't think it's super bad or regressive that Barbie starts out in an existential crisis and then just sorta ends that way. I think that's actually insightful, that mental illness can't so easily be overcome, that sometimes you really are changed by something and then can never make things 'normal' again.

But it's often pointed out that the relationship between the real-world mother and daughter never really sorta... goes very far. They disagree, but then the daughter shows sympathy to her mother, and that's pretty much it. We don't see much real change or conflict or true acrimony between them. We don't get a sense for internal thought processes. Of course, they're just side characters. But it adds to the whole of the movie and what the writers are comfortable doing with male vs female characters.

That the men are treated like babies for having feelings (despite being the oppressed group, in most cases here) is... discomfiting. But the sympathetic ending really does feel like a result of us only really being comfortable telling stories about men acting badly and being redeemed. Seen another way, yeah: men are allowed to act like babies and be forgiven. Barbie doesn't have the courage to do the same for women, even while decrying that same ideology. Not even at the very end.

Surely there has to be a better way to do this? Surely we can tell a story about women being expected to be perfect without them all actually being mostly flawless and Normal? Surely we can tell a story about the things men really struggle with, their problems that aren't taken seriously, without mocking all of them but then sighing and shrugging and going 'welll but we should be nice anyway :)'

#like. idk man. i think we should care abt men's issues because mental health matters #and because gender isn't the only form of oppression #and quite a lot of 'punching up' actually just targets those forms of societally accepted punching bags #with the transparent hand-wave of a 'male' tag to make it all okay #like that all is. an actual important part of the message #and if you take it all out idk what's even being said anymore #but it sounds like what some feminists do claim about men's issues #that men are worse in every way and their feelings aren't real but we're supposed to be nice anyway just because #not that i think general kindness is a bad message. but it doesnt seem like barbie says that either #i don't know man #barbie 2023

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a-not-so-sure-artist · 2 years

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After considering for a long time, I caved in today and decided to create more Twinsomnia OCs!

Lemme show ya how I made them :D

——————————————————————

This little kids’ name is Leon! He’s a 5 year old adopted kid who’s obsessed with anything and everything space related. Because he’s an orphan, he’s def got some of that mandatory secret traumatizing backstory that haunts him but I haven’t concluded what exactly. Yet 🙂

At first, I wanted him to have this toy space helmet that he wears 24/7 and have him have poofy hair that takes up space (pun intended) in there, but I wanted to try something else for fun, so I gave him braids instead because braids are cool 👍🏾 I also switched his little star onesie for an astronaut one ‘cause that’s what he wants to be when he grows up!

I played with his shape language a couple of times to see how unique I can make him look, however I got stuck so I’m ultimately going with the classic “tiny body big head” look and will hopefully redesign him more along the way.

(P.S: I know it says his name’s Louie on this drawing but I eventually switched it to Leon because it just. Fits him better 🤷🏾‍♀️)

This is Nicole! (For now…or not, I haven’t decided quite yet). She’s 12 years old and the older sibling of Leon, who’s adopted to her family, and uh…she’s pretty much your average stuck-up teen girl in children’s coming of age movies. ✨With a soft spot!✨

The first time I drew her (sketch on the right)—well, I liked it, but the way she turned out wasn’t what I was trying to go with. She looks 16-17 in this one, and I specifically wanted her to look a bit younger.

Designing her was kind of a hassle, especially because she either A) Didn’t look the exact age I wanted her to look in my eyes, and B) Her hair made her look like Megatron from the Transformers G1 series.

But EVENTUALLY, I came across a design that I absolutely ADORE! I just changed her hair a bit from straight to a lil curly and BAM! My favorite character of this trio <3

And now the Shadow Thing…I don’t really feel like posting my process for this thing because I despise it for existing and tormenting Leon and Nicole. And because I ran out of room to add more photos. The closest thing we can get to a design process of it is from my Twinsomnia detective “episode” post.

I didn’t plan on making it an actual OC at first, but I eventually came back to it when I needed a character interpretation for the fear of the dark. The Shadow Thing is basically similar to the Boogieman in the sense that it desires to feed off of children’s fears until they’re left traumatized. Yay. Fun.

Aaand to top this whole thing off, here’s some fun facts about these three! (mainly Nicole and Leon)

Nicole is Jamaican American (she has a Jamaican father and American mother) and Leon is African-American (The ethnicity of his past parents are unknown).

The Shadow Thing has similar shape-shifting abilities as the twins, except it can only take the form of anything scary.

Nicole has braces! And she hates it. She’ll attack anyone who reminds her that she does both physically and mentally. Even Leon.

The reason behind Leon’s left eye being hidden is because there’s a nasty scar on it. The eye already has a bandage over it, but he still hides it because he’s embarrassed by it :(

Speaking of eyes: Leon and Nicole originally were supposed to have each other’s eye shape, but I switched them up last minute!

Leon adore’s the twins. Nicole hates them. (I say hate but we all know she likes them deep down <3)

Nicole’s a complete phone addict and kiiiindaaa spoiled. She was having the time of her life being a pampered only child before her parents adopted Leon. Now she gotta learn to be humble >:(

Yeah, that’s pretty much it. Now Alex has more OC buddies!

#fanart #friday night funkin #fnf mod #fnf twinsomnia #twinsomnia #sketch #traditional art #fnf oc #fnf boy and girl #Now if only I could indulge in my ORIGINAL original characters like this #F you Tumblr for deleting my first attempt off the face of the earth #Jk I love you Tumblr please don’t ban me 🥺#Sorry the post is so long lol

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whumping-in-the-wings · 2 years

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It dawned on me earlier this week that I did not do any portraits for the Perfect Sorrows characters the way I did for the Traces ones. Naturally, because I lack any semblance of self-control, I immediately started hunting around for a Picrew that felt like it fit the vibe of the story.

I failed completely at finding said Picrew. Therefore I have instead opted for Door Number Two: try to figure Artbreeder out, with varying degrees of success. I thought about giving each character their own post, then decided that that would get very annoying, so instead, I’m just going to throw them all onto this post, in no particular order and accompanied by a not insignificant amount of commentary, because I can never shut up when given an opportunity to talk about my story-children. I have never used Artbreeder before and I have no idea if any of these are actually, ya know, good. But they do vaguely approach the appearances of the people in my head, so I’m just going to roll with it. Enjoy.

Monsieur Camille Serreau

Camille’s is probably the portrait I’m least happy with, not just because it was my first one, but because I think I went a little overboard on what I was trying to do. In the book I based this story on, sorciers are able to live for centuries, covering up their true age with magic. Though of course that gets harder to do as time goes on, so I really wanted Camille to look like maybe those centuries are catching up to him. He still looks far younger than he actually is, but the truth is starting to seep through a little. I’m not sure how successful I was. He looks a bit…odd.

Mademoiselle Serreau

She’ll get a first name eventually, but either way, I’m much happier with her portrait. She looks pretty, but not unrealistic. You could actually meet this girl on the street somewhere…except for the minor fact that I somehow managed to erase most of her pores, and any skin detail at all, really. Oops. I also think her smile is maybe just a touch too mischievous for the demure, sort of subdued Mademoiselle. But still, there’s an element of real-human-ness to her that I like a lot.

Ondine

Ondine I am ridiculously pleased with (and not only because she has actual skin detail). The word I used to describe her in the first chapter was “elegant,” and I really think this portrait has a touch of that, but you can also see how her life is wearing on her a bit. She may not be questioning her lot in life the way Sacha is, but it’s still a very difficult life, and this portrait kind of shows how she’s been slowly worn down by it. (Artbreeder also insisted on giving her a slight touch of eyeshadow on her left eye that I could not edit out for the life of me, which is annoying, but not a travesty).

Hugo

Hugo’s portrait is probably the closest to the way I see him in my head. It’s the expression that makes it. This man looks like his presence would make you uncomfortable. He looks like he is constantly judging every move you make but will never actually tell you what he thinks about you. He also just looks…butlerish. I cannot explain that further. (As a fun little aside, now that I know what Hugo’s animal is, I do see touches of that in this portrait too, so that’s fun).

Sacha

Sacha is maybe not as real-human-ish as some of the others, but I’m okay with that. I like my blorbos to look pretty while I torment them. So I mainly just fiddled with things until I liked what I saw and then very amateurishly edited the scar on. I did want to give him a thin sort of face though, since he presented himself in my head as very tall and thin with angular features. As my sister would put it, he gangles. Which is exactly the opposite of my usual type, but he refused to un-yardstick himself, so that just became his character, and I tried to give the portrait that same kind of leanness.

Laurent

Laurent was definitely the hardest of the bunch, simply because I had no mental image of what he looked like, other than a horrible little man who is ugly as sin. It turns out that “ugly” is not all that much to go on, and my first attempt turned out looking like a demented werewolf. So I gave it another go and ended up with this. Maybe not as viscerally unpleasant as I was hoping, but this website does not seem built for making ugly people. And he still looks like someone you absolutely would not want to meet in a dark alley, so I’m calling it good.

And there you have it! As close an approximation of these characters as my limited Artbreeder skills can get. I’ll probably do a Part Two at some point, since we still have more characters to meet.

#freya does things #character art #artbreeder #whump ocs

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glenrocklibraryteens · 11 months

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Book review/Addie Larue

Book review: The Invisible Life of Addie Larue

The Invisible Life of Addie Larue by V.E. Schwab Genres: fantasy, historical fiction Page number: 448 Rating: 5 stars Reviewer: Miranda Garcia-Galvez

The Invisible Life Of Addie Larue follows a young French girl from the countryside who is faced with the shackles of her simple life. After fleeing from her own arranged wedding, Adeline Larue runs to the woods to escape her fate in tears. Before she can recall the warning her friend gave her (” Never pray to the gods that answer after dark”), as well as that it was already sunset as she desperately prayed to whoever would answer her pleads. However, before she can right her wrong, her prayer is answered by an ancient god of the darkness, who names himself Luc. After transforming himself into the image of Addie’s ideal love, Luc curses Addie to an eternity of yes, immortality, and youth, but of forever being forgotten once anyone looks away from her.

Schwab is already a revered fantasy author as some know, but with Addie Larue, she combines the genre of fantasy with historical fiction in a way I’ve never read before. I, for one, am a novice when it comes to fantasy novels so this read was a first for me but with that quote alone: “Never pray to the gods that answer after dark”, I was hooked. The origins of Addie are addictive on their own, but as the story unfolds Schwab transports us to more eras of time than I can count. We go from 1700s in-the-middle-of-nowhere France to the French Revolutionary War in Paris to present-day New York City. We get thrown back and forth through these timelines with Addie as she struggles to survive as a woman who has nothing to her name and is alone in the face of history’s heinous conflicts. Although some people struggle with this kind of writing structure, Schwab’s writing keeps the reader enthralled for most of it. Besides Addie, we are of course introduced to characters like Luc, the enigmatic dark being who continues to torment her but eventually grows fond of her, and Henry who plays an incredibly important role in Addie’s life, becoming her love interest through most of the book. If you’ve noticed the inclinations to romance in this story from what I’ve said, you’re not mistaken. However, as much as the novel focuses on love, it just as equally touches on themes of mental health, identity, grief, and acceptance. From the start of the story to the very end, readers are immersed in Addie’s world as she tries to navigate her curse and find a way out of it, as well as the people she meets along the way and the impact they make on her.

Addie Larue Playlist:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/10rdrSonSahl1Ykzj6jBRW?si=6wg1tIe7SuykOE_29eXEFQ

Je te laisserai des mots by Patrick Watson: I just believe the feeling this song evokes is extremely fitting to the novel: simple, soft, and of course, french

Bookstore girl by Charlie Burg: I feel the lyrics to this song perfectly describe Addie, to how enigmatic the bookstore girl is, to the person who wants to know who she is so badly.

Wrapped up in books by Belle and Sebastian: I just feel like the feeling and lyrics of this song exemplify Henry. I also feel he would love it if he listened to it.

From Eden by Hozier: I feel the lyrics such as “baby, there’s something tragic about you, something so magic about you” perfectly depict how Addie must have felt about Henry at their encounter and afterward.

In The Woods Somewhere by Hozier: I feel like the lyrics, pace, and mood of the song embody the scene of Addie running into the woods in shambles, and of course, what follows.

Like Real People Do by Hozier: I feel like the lyrics of the song are completely fitting for Henry and Addie. For example, the lyrics: “ I will not ask where you came from, I will not ask and neither should you, honey just put your sweet lips on my lips, we should just kiss like real people do.” They both were willing to love each other without the gory details, and I feel there is something so special about that.

#book review #teen book review #fiction #glen rock teens

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moremysteriesthantragedies · 2 years

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Murder of a Sacred Deer

Rating: R | Genre: Mystery, thriller | POV: 3rd Person Limited

Story written with: M, D, Q.

"Why did you give up your life so early when you had a chance to fix everything?”

Book Synopsis

In 1998, Roe Theron, the younger sister of the infamous Heart Thief, takes her own life in the bathroom of her mother's house. However, she soon finds life after death isn't as peaceful as she originally thought. Thrown in Hell for her brother's crimes, doing anything it takes to survive, she finds he may be closer than she originally believed when she hears that familiar voice on the radio.

Taglists

Wip Update Tag list:

Worldbuilding Taglist:

Trigger Warnings

Suicide, guns and hunting/animal death, self-harm, physical abuse, sexual abuse, past childhood abuse, depression and other mental health struggles, trauma, murder, emotional abuse and manipulation, referenced past racism, and discussions of the concepts of sin and purity.

Themes: Family trauma, coming to terms with the past, predators vs prey, power struggles, life after death, sin, self-respect, and finding joy in disparity.

Tropes: Friends with benefits, Hell/life after death, furry characters, broken ace, crazy murder (but he's a sweetheart, really), morally grey characters.

Characters

Roe P. Theron

#ghosthorns🌹

Affiliation: Wolfgang employee Theme Song: Too Much to Dream by Allie X

Age: 1971-1998 (physically 27) Sinner Type: Jackalope Personality Type: ISFP Pronouns: She/her Orientation: Asexual lesbian Height: 5'9"

The white, adoptive younger sister of Hart, now working as an assassin and bodyguard for a powerful sinner named Wolfgang. Not very sociable, with her guard often up, and acts very depressed most of the time. Has a talent as a snipper, and much sharper than she looks, though her current job has given her more than a little trauma.

“If you’re just here to torment and belittle me, you can save your breath."

Hart B. Theron

#hearthief💘

Affiliation: Powerful sinner & radio/show host Theme Song: Killing of a Sacred Deer by NEON666

Age: 1967-1997 (physically 30). Sinner Type: Weredeer Personality Type: INFP Pronouns: He/him Orientation: Demisexaul aromantic Height: 6'1"

A mixed-race radio and TV host. The Heart Thief in life after hours, killed by a rival known as "Lynx". Remains a radio and TV host in death, and has quite a reputation for violence. Despite this, he has a very polite and sunny disposition toward anyone he interacts with and tries not to cause other sinners any inconvenience.

My past was a well-guarded secret, the whole scare factor of the Heart Thief was the mystery that came with the persona. But clearly, I’d slipped up along the way...

Angie

#angiespeaking📞

Affiliation: Wolfgang employee Theme Song: Habits (Stay High) by Tove Lo

Age: 1997-2022 (physically 25) Sinner Type: Play bunny Personality Type: ESFP Pronouns: He/him (trans) Orientation: Demisexual biromantic demiromantic Height: 5'8"

A white/Canadian social media star, who died when trying to attempt to kill his cheating fiancé in a fit of rage. Know for being very flirtatious and often gives other pet names. Still, is very kind and takes more shy individuals at his work under his wing, Roe being an example.

It was the half-bunny from before, ears flopped down even further as they bent over, reaching out a careful paw to me, the other holding a bottle.

Updates

Snippets

(Scenes written for fun and do not completely reflect the final project.)

Other Links

LINE Club Music

#murder of a sacred deer #tw suicide

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clara-oswald-and-the-whos · 2 years

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I’m playing dragon quest xi. And I love it.

BUT (rant incoming)

I am so fucking sick of hearing the same five songs EVERYWHERE. Now I know I’m spoiled to a degree by xenoblade (my fave series) which has dozens of long tracks for the over world and they range from good to fucking fantastic.

But like, what is even happening. Why did they decide having so few songs was okay for a 100+ game. Like wtf guys?!? And one of them is super bombastic and so you can’t even really tune it out. (And I already turned down the music some which was initially so loud you could hardly hear the fantastic voice acting)

Speaking of which, I am really struggling with the fact that the protagonist is silent. Especially in act iii. Should I, the hero, explain anything that’s happening to my friends and use any of my brain cells to figure out a plan? Or should I put everyone in danger by explaining nothing and let them do all the mental lifting and just act as a pair of hands to hold a sword? I could kind of justify it with the first two acts but not the third one at all. And like the other characters are so good and well developed. And they didn’t even give the hero freaking FACIAL EXPRESSIONS. he literally stares dead eyed 95% of the time (even went staring at the tormented ghost of his dead father ugggh). I buy his friendship with Erik because Erik is so damn likable that he could have chemistry with a brick wall. But no one else. Like they even gave the hero a voice and personality as a kid but not as an adult. Like seriously?! And I do not buy him and Gemma at all. and I love a good romance but there is no chemistry and she has no personality outside of a rural accent and her love for the hero.

There is so much potential and drama in his Story but they do nothing with it so they can do an awkward throw back to 80s games. Back when game had the barest hint of a story so I didn’t matter if the main character had any personality. He didn’t have to be a chatty guy but give me SOMETHING to work with. Anything please, besides yes or no answers. I really want to like him! I had almost managed to head canon some personality until act iii, where the narrative limit of making him silent kills any and all emotional realism and honestly some of the stakes. This is just so frustrating. Gah.

Link, who is also silent, has more personality then the hero does in breath of the wild with its 10 whole cut scenes. And they only get away with him being silent because the story is so light in the game. And there is no one around to talk do. And he has expressions!! Link in that game is either a stoic/shy determined warrior or a crazed goblin depending on how you play him but you can alway make his actions fit into you head canon because there is nothing that kills the emotional realism of the story. Like please. You cant pull that stuff off in a story heavy, character filled narrative. It just doesn’t hold water.

Okay. I said my peace.

on a positive note I fucking love my best blorbo Erik. *chefs kiss*

#I feel better now #dragon quest xi #rant #silent protagonist

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bullet-prooflove · 2 years

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Good evening! (Well, it's evening where I live) :-) First, you should truly consider uploading the "Survivors" work to AO3. It's amazing and deserves more readers. It's that good! Now, I'm about to offer an opinion on your story "Survivors". And that's all this is - my opinion. Because I care about it and it's written so very well. So please accept my opinion from one writer to another. And I recognize a great writer when I read one and that's YOU. About the story, for some reason, the story has been on my mind lately, specifically, recent comments from others imploring you for a "happy" ending for Will and his girlfriend. I wouldn't care about this story to this extent if it were written frivolously and without any realism. You've taken such care in writing both of them and it shows. Again, you're to be commended on your courage for tackling such a difficult topic. Your writing for this story is as real as it gets and it deserves to be taken seriously. My concern is that the temptation to deliver your characters from their torment will be so great that a happy ending will be had at the end of this journey. If you're considering such an ending, I implore you to reconsider. Given the subject matter, the truth is - the simple, rock-bottom truth - is there cannot be a "happy" ending for either of them. First, the sheer brutality of the assault (she was barely alive when she was found) literally transforms a person. Will's girlfriend is no longer same person she was before this happened. And over the next few chapters, this transformation can be realized in stages. It's like a bomb detonated in her life leaving only destruction and scorched earth. Now, there's hope for her, of course. But the hope might lie in learning how to live with this ... on her own. Tetrasing the broken pieces of her life into a new a different person. Not less than - but different than. At the end of the journey, she realizes she doesn't hate or blame Will, but she also realizes he no longer "fits" into her life any longer. It's what happens in real life to survivors of horrible trauma. It's not necessarily a sad ending at all. It's reality. It's truth. And that's beautiful because it's all part of the human condition. And your characters deserve to be human. It's honest given what she's been through. Given what he's been through. They're both stronger at the end of this and have learned something important and special. And there's no bitterness. They live on in peace ... separately. Okay, I'm finished now. You can disregard all this rambling! Just felt I had to share this. Love your story! Have a wonderful evening and I'm eager to read your next installment!

Hi Annie,

Thanks for the message, it was lovely to wake up to read through and I adore talking to other writers.

I post so much in this place I forget that AO3 exists sometimes. Thank you for your kind words on Survivors, I have really enjoyed exploring Will and the effects of an event like this.

It is always lovely to get another's writers thoughts on the work you are doing. Truthfully I am not a conformist, I tell the story the way my brain creates it and nothing can influence that. I know people hope for a happy ending and for some that's why they read fanfic but that's just not me. I can assure you that the reader comments won't change the way their story plays out. It's already written.

When I started this story I wanted to write about how something like this affects not just the victim but the people around them too.

For a lot of my stories I draw from real life and if I don't have the experiance I research and talk to people who have. That's why alot of my stories explore mental health and PTSD as these are things I have dealt with. I am pretty open about my experiances. I also know how a near death experiance can change a person and how they can recover and process that. You are right, nobody can be the same after that.

I understand what you are saying about happy endings and the process of recovery and the story does explore both side of that in terms of Will coming to terms with his own issues regarding the attack and his partner doing the same on her side of things. I don't sugar coat it.

The thing about me and my writing is that I will never pull a punch. If I think it needs to be told I will tell it. As a survivor myself I go where my experiance takes me.

I don't want to spoil any future chapters for you so I'll keep it zipped before I start divulging the whole thing but I really want to thank you for this message. It is refreshing as hell to hear someone's honest POV and discuss this type of thing.

Anytime you wanna chat just pop into my inbox, because i have sincerely enjoyed this interaction.

Thanks babe!

Donna x

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bigboobyhalo · 3 years

Text

DSMP characters and how they would be butchered if the DSMP was a mainstream movie franchise a la the marvel cinematic universe

DREAMXD: is the main big evil villain, has the most boring humanoid design you can imagine, heavily queer-coded

DREAM: tragic backstory, was actually possessed by dreamXD the entire time, tommy forgives him for the horrible torment and abuse and manipulation

GEORGE: has no personality but gets more screen time than ponk and skeppy combined

SAPNAP: boring dumb hot jock character

SAM: straight up 100% evil and irredeemable, not even a whore

PONK: barely gets any screen time, is killed off by sam (they're never in a relationship, they were just implied to be friends at some point)

BAD: was a normal heterosexual man until he got possessed by the evil twisted egg that made him gay and gave him sinful desires for skeppy. confesses his feelings for skeppy and immediately gets sent to super hell

TOMMY: starts off loud and bold and becomes quiet and meek due to trauma but it's portrayed as a good thing, implied to have a crush on drista (dream's sister who's "not like her family" and is basically a manic pixie dream girl)

TUBBO: no personality beyond comic relief

FUNDY: only heavily implied to be trans in a scene where he dramatically cuts off his hair to sad music but it's never explicitly stated

PUNZ: cishet but paints his nails

PURPLED: annoying edgy teenage boy who makes dry, self-deprecating comments

WILBUR: tommy's biological brother, demonized for being mentally ill, heavily implied to be a predatory gay man stereotype

SCHLATT: abusive gay man, implied tragic backstory

SKEPPY: barely any personality or screen time, after bad's death he basically never shows up again

ERET: says he "doesn't like to use labels" so the writers don't have to explicitly say that he's bi, is never redeemed or shows any remorse

JACK MANIFOLD: completely evil villain, extremely misogynistic, treated as though he "corrupted" niki, redeemed in a scene where he sacrifices himself for tommy with no prior build-up and then dies

NIKI: complete damsel in distress with no agency or character

QUACKITY: good god the shit they would do to him and his character is too much to fit in one tumblr post

KARL: misogynist but it's treated as quirky and adorkable like in the big bang theory

HBOMB: portrayed as a creepy crossdresser who's predatory towards fundy

TECHNO: the voices in his head are demonized and are portrayed as what make him evil and violent

ANT: has a one-off scene where he offhandedly mentions his dead husband (velvet) who's never brought up again

PHIL: neglectful deadbeat dad

CONNOR: actually enjoyable comic relief

PUFFY: foolish's sister, comic relief, heavily implied to have a crush on bad (it's implied bad returned her feelings before he was corrupted and became a Nasty Sinful Gay Person)

RANBOO: has DID and it's villainized to hell and back, his enderwalk state is his 100% evil ill-intentioned alter ego, michael is his pet pig

FOOLISH: boring human with powers, his only personality is being a cool buff guy with lightening powers, twist villain

HANNAH: femme fatale who uses her looks to lure people to the egg, gets killed off but it's seen as justified and "her own fault"

SLIME: genderbent with big slime tiddies, born sexy yesterday, forced romance with quackity

MICHAEL: predatory gay man stereotype

#dsmp #dreamsmp #hoo boy does this need some tags #homophobia m #transphobia m #ableism m #ask to tag #here it is! the worst list yet.#this was a collaboration of sorts. help from the happyblr discord server was had. especially from altar altarofdecay

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thatbangtanbloom · 2 years

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unspoken || 4

teaser | 1 | 2 | 3| 4

characters: kim namjoon, kim seokjin, min yoongi, jung hoseok, park jimin, kim taehyung, jeon jungkook, reader

pairings: ot7 x fem! reader

categories: angst, fluff, suggestive situations

genre: idol!bts, idol!reader, yandere!bts

warnings: mention of violence, blood, manipulation by the boys, sasaengs, reader thinks she did a bad thing (death) but does not

word count: 3.3k

a/n: this chapter provides a bit more context about the reader’s relationship with taehyung/jimin and also her bandmates!

・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．

The recurring thought of you not being safe continues to torment your mind throughout album negotiations, photo shoot scheduling, and clothes fitting. You could not stop think about the look in the saeaengs- you refuse to believe that you were face to face with Lee Jinhyeon who singlehandedly tried to take your debut away from you after rejecting him - eyes as he urged you to speak with him. His normally chocolate eyes were an iridescent brown, showcasing his crueler intentions had you not managed to call the police first. It ran like a blur, trying to usher all the girls into the room and locking the door as Jinhyeon pounded on it like a mad man.

The way he screamed your name sent a chill down your side. When the two of you were close friends during your trainee years, you never thought he would hurt you. You never could fathom he would be the one to terrorize you just two years later…

Your hands continued to shake.

The sudden sound of your phone ringing makes you shake away your thoughts. Mentally exhausted from today’s events, your fellow members slept soundly in their bunk beds. Only Yoorin sleeps in the same bed with you; her arms wrapped securely around your waist as she sleeps. She seemed to take Jinhyeon’s presence harder than you do.

You smile lightly at her. Before Taehyung ever paid you any mind, Yoorin always was there to look after you. Despite being only a couple months apart, she took on the role as your support. She was the best friend anyone could ask for — her only arguable flaw would be her supreme disdain from Taehyung.

Shaking your thoughts away, your phone buzzes to life with ‘Jjiminie🤍’ scrawled across the screen. You smile to yourself. He had made it a habit to always call you just before bed so that he could be the last one you would talk to at night. Sliding your index finger across the screen, you answer with a smile.

“You answered,” Jimin murmurs on the other line. His Busan satoori paints his sentences, “I was hoping you would.. we didn’t have much time to talk.”

“We didn’t,” You affirm as you shift on the bed and sigh. “I’m sorry for being so cold earlier… I was just in my head and I’ve been so stressed.. That wasn’t like me.” You hate how you ramble, but Jimin doesn’t mind. “I will do better-“

“No, I’m not what matters right now. It’s you.” Jimin whispers softly to soothe your worries. It’s as though his voice alone makes your worries dissipate away. “It just hurt me so much to think that there wasn’t anything that I could do for you. You looked so scared and fragile. You’re never like that.” You suck on your bottom lip. You exhale a breath you had not realize you were holding in. “Yeah....” “It made me realize.. there’s so much more of you that I’ve yet to discover.” Jimin’s words spill over as he settles down on his bed in the dorm. The other boys were quiet as mice following what happened this morning at your dorm. It was suffocating Jimin. Jimin volunteered himself to be your caregiver whenever you needed it. At music shows when your promotional schedules overlapped courtesy of BigHit’s attempt to highlight the label, he slipped pick me up messages into your palm when he walked past swiftly enough so no one would notice. Once, he even managed to send you a playful wink when your group greeted his own to make you choke on your words. Jimin sits back as he listens to your labored breathing on the other line. He can only think of what it would feel like to have you cradled into his side. His fingers would trail small hearts over the apple of your shoulder and kiss the top of your head. “That should have never happened to you... it makes me sick to my stomach to think anyone would try to trap you like that.” The bitter irony of his words go over his head and your heart aches. “It’s in the past now, Jimin... I’m just glad no one got hurt.... I’m okay too.” Jimin’s smile grows lopsided. He was happy you gave him the reassurance he needed to understand that you were okay. “Can I come over? I know it’s risky but I can promise I won’t get caught.”

You know what he means. Your girls have only ever seen Taehyung come over — to surprise you on your birthday and your first win — and he left little to the imagination. But even so, your shared room with Yoorin. Would Jimin spend the night? Where would he sleep? You never thought to look too much into it, but it was as though Taehyung left his mark on every aspect of your life.. almost as though he wanted the world to know the two of you were together. You had no qualms about his love for you but it proved to be harder to hide from the company. Moreover, it complicated the relationship dynamic when you did your best to share your time equally with all seven of them.

“I know you’re hesitating and you can tell me if you do not want me to come and see you.” Jimin adds gently as he hears your silence on the other line. He wonders if you hesitate with Taehyung — had Taehyung even given you the option to ?

“No, no… you can come… we all share rooms.. that’s what I was thinking.” You reply as you glance at the many luggage.

Jimin would never waste a moment of not being with you. He doesn’t even hesitate to respond, “I’ll be there.”

Jimin hangs up on the other line before you could murmur your affirmation of endearment and you sigh.

You unwrap Yoorin’s arms that were around your waist and climb out of her bed. You wanted to look somewhat presentable for Jimin since he was coming to see you. Your Line Friends Ryan pajamas that Namjoon had bought you hung snug around your frame and you smile at the thought of your other boyfriend.

Your smile drops as you begin your skincare routine. Had Jungkook been right about you not spending your time equally with the others? You did your best to spend as much time with them as your time allowed — between live streams, practice, photo shoots, contact negotiations, and brand deals — you were either on the phone with them or cuddled up beside one of them… when was the last time you had spent free one with your members?

Just as you finish your skincare routine, your phone buzzes to life. No doubt it is informing you of Jimin’s arrival and you quickly pull on a pair of old sweatpants - likely Seokjin’s - and jog downstairs to the first floor to be greeted by Jimin waiting.

“You got here fast.” You laugh softly as you quickly sign Jimin in and thank the security. You’re hyper aware of the security recognizes the blonde-haired male or if the company would learn.

“I ran here, actually.” Jimin laughs softly. “I couldn’t help not wasting a minute.” He says as he steps onto the elevator besides you.

Jimin’s eye smile is enough to send butterflies rippling through your stomach. One of the more ambitious of your boyfriends, Jimin never failed to have you wrapped around his finger. You honestly think that you would run away with him if you asked him. It was not as though Jimin would ever ask you to do that.

Only, Jimin would. It was precisely that thought that crossed his mind that enticed him. Although it was unspoken, the competition between the seven of them seemed to only grow more fierce with each passing day. Something snapped — they snapped — and the thought of sharing you proved to be more difficult than initially anticipated.

“Jimin?” You ask, a bit confused when you step off the elevator and grab his hand. Your warmth transfers from you to him and Jimin grows weak in the knees. His legs are like jelly as he stumbles in a very un-Jimin fashion. “It looks like I lost you there for a second.”

“I was lost in you.” Jimin speaks as though his words are paint brushes against a canvas; you. You who is so enticing.. the one that he blooms for. His toothy grin grows when he notices your cheeks tinting pink. “Have you fallen for me?”

“You know I’m in love with you, Jimin.” You tease as you put in the pin code to the front door. You don’t catch how Jimin mentally remembers it. Who knows what he would need it for?

Your affirmation burns desire in the pit of Jimin’s stomach and he practically presses his entire body against yours. He is much more swift than you are, his limbs easily guiding you against the back of the door and his thumb brushes against your bottom lip with desire.

“How in love with me are you?” Jimin asks as his eyes stare back into yours. “Tell me how much you love me.” His voice rasps in your ear. His lips capture yours before you can respond. His left hand cups the under side of your jaw while the right trails down the curves of your body. It takes everything in him not to pull down the joggers right then and there... but Jimin could be patient. For you. Jimin tastes like honey in your mouth. His plump lips nearly consume you whole as his hand leaves your hip to press his entire body deeper against you and force you against the door. God -- you were everything that he cold ever imagine. He wonders how he ever manages to go a day without his lips wrapped around yours and his hands brushing the flower between your thighs.

”I need you,” his voice drops a lower octave and his words slur. He sounds drunk without any alcohol. It is clear that he’s intoxicated from just your taste. His normally hickory brown eyes tint cobalt black. “YN..?” Your eyes turn from his intense ones to glare behind him. How could you explain to any of your members why you were kissing Jimin if it was so obvious that you were with Taehyung? The thought crosses your mind that it is necessary to tell them about your six other boyfriends…but the worry swallows you whole and ultimately stops you from thinking of anything else.

Jimin remains stagnant as he pulls back slightly to observe you. It was almost as though you were not actually there, but rather a ghost of you. What exactly were you thinking about?

The fragility of your state reminded you of your more formative, vulnerable years as a trainee. You were born, bred, meant to be an idol. You followed the schedules no matter how grueling they were, partook in any diet and exercise that they asked of you, and molded yourself to become the ideal form of whatever they wanted. You only had your ambitions besides the small luggage of clothing on your back.

Your trainee life was black and white. Everything remained simple and dimly lit until the day you crossed paths with your charismatic senior, Kim Taehyung. You could still remember that day in 2015 when you crossed paths with him while waiting for water. He was taller than you then, just as much as he is now, and the sweetest box smile you had ever seen. You were aware of how idiosyncratic was, how that was his charm to make everyone love him. You were no different in admiring him, but you knew better than to become involved with a senior when you only were a year (of what you did not know would be five) of training.

“You’re trainee #146?” He greets you with a small smile on his lips. His head tilting slightly to the side as he observes you. He knew your name was LN YN, that you had a brief stint of dancing in high school, and that lyrics were your specialty. Of course, he could not spill how much he knew about you.

He had to keep you guessing.

Surprised he knows your number, you stand a bit straighter. “Yes.. LN YN, sunbae.” You bow deeply to him in response. “

“YN.” He smiles slowly and nods. “That’s pretty.”

Another memory with Taehyung ricochets through your thoughts.

“I had not known you could move like that,” Taehyung’s whisper kisses your ear as he stands beside you at the convenience store. It was well past midnight, actually nearing 2 in the morning, when Taehyung called you out of your dorm for a midnight walk. Unaware of what this meant between the two of you - the more frequent visits, his volunteering more to oversee the monthly trainee evaluation whenever your slot was up, “I was impressed.”

You blush, glancing down at your glove. Taehyung had left his back at the dorm in the rush to see you and you offered to share the only pair that you brought with you to Seoul. “Really? That means a lot hearing it from you, sunbae.”

You do not notice the slight wince that escapes Taehyung’s lips. “You don’t have to be so formal with me. We’re friends, right?” He cracks the egg into the sizzling ramen in front of you and tosses the eggshell remnants into the trash. “Call me Tae.”

“Okay.. Tae..” you admit sheepishly as you look up at him. The mask hangs loosely off his ears, a measly attempt to mask his identity.

“Let’s sit outside.” Taehyung suggests with a smile as he opens the door for you and lets you walk out first. You wonder if he realizes how cold it is, but you shake the thought away. You had never had anyone show this much attention to you ever. Why pass it up?

“How did you find this place?” You ask after he guides you to a bench near the basketball court. Only the lights from the hoop illuminates the night besides the streetlights.

Taehyung’s heart rattled as he looks at you. For the last few months, he knew you awoke such strong emotions in him that he could not let subside. He fought with the idea of not approaching you, afraid you would be one of those trainees who were overzealous or stuck to the book… but somehow he always kept running back to you.

Even now, with your cheeks tinted ever so slightly from the cold and the roundness of your cheeks from a bite of ramen, he struggles not to kiss you. You awake something primitive in him.

The utterance of his name from you shakes him away from his thoughts. He had to control himself. “Ah… I met one of my friends here after he got cut from the debut list… it’s close by but also discreet at this time.” He explains leaning over to take a bigger slurp of his ramen. “I come here to think sometimes… I came here a lot last year, especially.” He explains sincerely as he thinks back to how much the team struggled since it had already been over a year since they debuted with no wins and low album sales. He was thankful to the loyal ARMY who stayed with them and joined along the way, but he still felt anxious. He experienced that a lot lately, what with being so far from home and being so close with his family… but that worry dissipated when he was with you. You reminded him of home.

Your welcoming smile, the way you pretended not to notice when his knee brushed against yours, your change of habit to meet him near the water fountain in a discreet manner. Surely you were interested in him the same way you were.

He could not fathom letting that go to waste. You were meant to be his and no one else’s. That much was very simple.

“I didn’t know,” You respond with soft eyes. “This place must be really special to you.” You look at him and smile. Your smile sets a flame in his heart.

“I wanted to bring you here too.. I think we are close now, almost as much as my members and me.” His words come up before he can stop them. Shit — was he confessing? But as he looks at you, looking at him with the same gentle eyes he’s always loved… he can not stop himself. “I hope we can be closer in the future.”

You found yourself so absorbed in his words that you had not notice how he had placed his chopsticks down to hold your hand in his lap. You could feel a million warning signs about the future of your career, what it would mean for you debuting… you did not know how much longer it would be until your debut… “I.. I hope so to.” You whisper, squeezing his hand back with a smile.

In so many words, Taehyung had not asked you to become his girlfriend.. but he had taken it as such. He called you out more frequently, but not enough to make either the trainee director or his manager suspicious. They chalked it up to Taehyung’s eccentric behavior.

Another year would pass before Taehyung would muster up the courage to ask you out. 2016 proved to be an even more rewarding year for BTS - short tour stunts across the Asian continent coupled with more success… your life could not prove to be more grueling — more trainees added to the list and more being cut by the day. Taehyung was aware of this and knew that you needed to be dependent on him to make things work. He wanted to know every bit about you before you would become his. He owes you this much, to know your strengths and weaknesses, what you desire in a partner, and how he could become everything you needed.

He shows up to every monthly evaluation with the same stoic look. He feigns a blank face in front of you when you perform. He acts as though he does not know you for two reasons: to ensure no one would know of your little arrangement and teach you what it feel like to live life without him. You thank him with a bitter smile when he asks you to come out that same night despite knowing how exhausted you were.

He wanted to break you. But he wanted to piece you back together, too.

He knew that you would never be able to reject him on his birthday, so after performing at MBC Gayo… he immediately makes his way towards the familiar convenience store just after midnight with hopes you would be there waiting for him. He understood how full both of your schedules were.. how your anxieties were beginning to pile up… but for one night, he hopes that he could be the difference.

He practically runs out of the dorms to the nearby basketball court accompanied by the all-too-familiar convenience store. Seeing you in your usual attire of sweatpants and oversized leather jacket (it actually was his, but he gave it to you) makes his heart grow warm.

Yet when he moves closer, his mouth falls open in surprise. The small cake that sits in your lap with candles already lit makes him realize he chose wisely. How many other girls would have surprised him like this? No one. Only you. He had to have you.

You sing the same happy birthday song that his members would sing to him later that day, but to him? It is as though you prepared that song for him and him alone. “Happy birthday to you~ happy birthday dear Taehyungie..” you remember how much he liked to be called that. “Happy birthday to you! Now make a wish!”

Taehyung wishes for the two of you to be together forever. You to be together always. He also briefly wishes to for no one to ever be the reason the two of you part. And with his last thoughts, he thinks not of a wish but a vow that he will punish anyone who attempts otherwise. ・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・．

don’t be a silent reader! please leave your comments, questions, and thoughts :)

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ayakahimeehe · 3 years

Text

·ૈ 𝐋𝐈𝐕𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐎𝐍 𝐋𝐈𝐄𝐒 3 ── 𝐊𝐀𝐙𝐔𝐇𝐀 𝐈𝐌𝐀𝐆𝐈𝐍𝐄

── your hair has been adorned with a golden flower and your face with many cracks, and perhaps a heart like his, scared like your own, would help you learn just what the meaning of your own life and creation has been. perhaps he would give you a meaning.

── gn ; angst with (finally) comfort ; SPOILERS FOR THE INAZUMA ARCHON QUEST (prologue - act 3) AND SCARAMOUCHE'S BACKSTORY ; uh information dump because I'm bad at dialogue ; slight alterations to the whole story ; reader is a minor deity in inazuma ; toxic relationships (mostly mother - children) ; injuries, death and battle ; reader has an electro vision and uses a katana ; description of death and minor character death ; reader’s given name is mitsuyo ; mention of trauma and just mental health in general ; seriously, there are spoilers for everything so please don't read before completing the quest itself.

── part 1 ; part 2 ; part 3 (final part) .

When Ei had first risen to power, she had created three puppets of different morals. The first, whom she had entrusted with her "heart", she had deemed too gentle, whether he was a tool or a human, for he shed tears in his sleep upon his creation. He should have become the Carrier of The Gnosis amongst the three. The second, she had deemed too frail for their skin began to shatter like porcelain under the pressure of their creator's memories and principles. They had been the One made to Bestow Judgment. And so came the third, a copy of Ei's own appearance, created without the flaws the first two had been born with. Compared to her peers, the Shogun did not shed tears, it did not shatter, nor did it smile and it did not laugh. To Ei, that was the perfection she had seeked, a body and a mind strong enough to bring glory to the archon's demands. She had become The Upkeeper of Eternity.

As time passed, the two first puppets, although older and wiser, had begun feeling forgotten by the deity. Like two defective toys that she had no interest in. And so, a tormenting fire of fury began sparking in the first's heart as his gnosis was taken without any mercy. All the while, a river of unshed tears had gathered in the soul of the second, who had learned to bear the pain of their creator's past and yet the katana they'd been born to wild had been snatched off their hands without a second thought. The first had rioted, demanding entry within the plane of the Archon. He wanted to prove that he was more than capable of fulfilling his mission, and when Ei denied it, the flames became too dangerous to tame. Infuriated, the first puppet chose to cut his long locks and flee from Tenshukaku, beaconing his sibling to follow on his steps.

Yet they refused, and remained trapped within the walls of the palace like an obedient child, letting their mother play with their hair as they watched the city from above, craft them a fake vision that they had no need for in truth, just to fit in with the common folk.. and slowly growing into a power hungry, arrogant being that would not stop their quest until the divine sword had been put back in their hands and their skin had stopped shattering.

However, now that you had achieved your mission, that the sword was back in your hands and that you had sealed someone's fate, you began wondering.. Was it really what you had desired all this time? Was power really the thing you seeked so much?

Ei's memories had been long locked inside your own mind, a way of preventing her from suffering from the erosion every archon feared so much, and yet the feeling of lightning bending at your will as you ended someone's life.. That was not what you wanted to feel. It did not make you feel as though you could control better the aftermath of the erosion, not even the slightest bit. On the contrary, once again, your mother had been right before. You were too weak for your own good.

War was all you can see and hear, electricity flowing through your fingertips as you saw them bow at your feet, begging you not to slay them as you did the serpent.. but this was not you.. These were the memories of a kagemusha, a body crafted just like yours, by the hands of a god. These were Ei's memories, the reality of the situation far too cruel for you to endure alone.

Your Katana had clattered loudly as it hit the ground, unfocused eyes snapping back to reality and the series of calmness shattering all around you. Aether gasped loudly, Paimon began yelling about something shattering, the Raiden spoke her words of disapproval and the one person you began to truly care for took hurried steps back, taking his hands off your skin like it burned him. Kazuha's hands trembled as he looked at them in horror, pieces of porcelain in his palms that seemed to resemble the colour of your own skin, yet you felt nothing..

Your skin was shattering.. Yet you felt nothing.

Perhaps that was the moment when your creator had finally made up her mind, perhaps she's decided that you would never serve her at anything for you were, in fact, far too frail to accomplish your mission. She had whispered sweet words of encouragement and endearment throughout your endeavours, but even she knew that you would not be able to stand the divine punishment yourself.

For a moment, all you could see was darkness, the same feeling of vertigo grasping your body yet this time was different, because as you turned around, instead of seeing her meditating peacefully, the entity revered as Beelzebub had the same katana you've used merely moments ago, little away from your neck. You had intended to take her punishment without a second thought, letting your hands rise slightly upwards as if accepting a gift that she was bestowing you with, and you closed your eyes, awaiting the moment for the calmness of death to sweep you over, and yet it never came.

Kazuha could not stay and watch any longer, he did not understand what was happening and he began fearing that every single move you make would have your skin shattering like it did as he held you. Perhaps he blamed himself, in all of his confusion, his mind began connecting points and pieces that would deem him as the reason you're now suffering, yet when he recovered from the strange feeling that took over his body and his eyes settled on the archon's sword coming for your neck, quite literally, he refused to stay and watch any longer.

The ronin drew his own sword, feeling electricity spark on his own skin as he jumped right in front of you and let his blade clash against the divine one. It was a foreign feeling, Kazuha had felt before the buzzing sensation around him, but it was always because of an electro user that wielded their vision around him. This time, however, it felt as though it was coming from himself, an empowering force guiding his hands as a sharp, violet light filled the room. Unbeknownst to him, the hollow vision pinned on his scarf, just below his anemo one, had begun shining brighter than it had done in years. 'There will always be those who dare to brave the lightning's glow.'

He was pushing with all of his might, teeth clenched and bared and eyes glaring into Ei's. The harder he pushed, the more her own expression turned displeased, and she did not intend to play around with foolish samurai, so the moment he pushed, so did she, a flow of energy separating them as though their blades could no longer stand the pressure. Ei's eyes had turned wide, confused as to what just happened, while Kazuha had been thrown back to the tatami floor with a grunt, his only way of steadying himself being his sword. The now hollow vision clattered to the ground, making it to your feet and you picked it up without a second thought, yet everyone remained too concentrated on the archon to pay you any mind.

From across the room, you noticed Aether who began softly jumping on his feet as though preparing himself to dash forward, and you gave him a court nod as your eyes met, backing away harshly before grabbing Kazuha's shoulders to steady him and you ran. You've heard Paimon's shout but you decided that not turning around would be for the better, Aether knew what to do, after all, Yae Miko had definitely had a hand in his arrival at Tenshukaku in the first place, and it did not take a lot to understand that the portal to the Plane of Euthymia had still been open as Ei showed herself, he had everything he needed to succeed. You hoped.. He had.

You continue running, hand holding Kazuha's harshly as if you feared you'll lose him on the way, yet he followed you closely, without daring to ask a single question. As you made your way to the statue, your feet had begun slowing down, adrenaline wearing down and chest rising irregularly as you tried to steady your breathing. "Kazuha!" It was an unfamiliar voice, but it belonged to a soldier of the resistance you concluded, someone of high seniority. A few others followed behind him, yet they all seemed to halt as their eyes settled on you, some growing with fury and other with confusion at the way your face had begun chipping away. Your stare remained harsh itself, but you did not seem to wish harm upon them, so the general continued forward with careful steps, his hand reaching to pat the shoulder of the man beside you. "We're returning to Sangonomiya at this instant and you'll tell us everything that's happened, that's an order." Yet by the way his tail wagged and his years fell, you could understand instantly that he only wished the best for his friend.

"I shall, but they'll be coming with us."

"Take my hand, Mitsuyo, we can leave this place! We can make a world in which we write our own fate and only we decide what makes us worthy of power!" But you did not reply, you simply watched the sakura petals fall from the veranda you were seated at. For a long while, the only sound that could be heard was the whistle of the wind and the ruffling of the tree's flowery branches, but he did not dare to speak again, waiting for your reply with his breath stopping in his lungs. You shook your head after giving it some thought, not seeming interested in his proposal yet not surprised by his daring nature.

"We were not meant for the outside world, Kunikuzushi." You signed, closing your eyes as your head hung low. At your words, his voice began shaking, his eyes watering like they had usually done, as underneath the hard exterior he put up, your brother had a fragile heart. "She'll abandon us! Didn't you hear? She'll kill us, Mitsuyo, we cannot stay here any longer!" He insisted, his hands now grasping at your kimono, yet all you could do was watch as he fell next to you, his head resting on your lap and his tears falling carelessly on the soft material of your clothes. One of your hands began caressing the top of his head gently, fingers running through his long hair lovingly, but you could not do much besides console him until his tears dried up and his soft snores filled the air.

The following morning, as you entered his chamber to wake him up, you felt as though emptiness filled your heart. Kunikuzushi did as he promised to do the previous evening, he left. His clothes were neatly folded and settled on the tatami flooring, the golden arrow Ei had gifted him now resting on top of them. That had been the only time you allowed yourself to shed tears.

"I understand. We may be able to provide you shelter, however even as a divine priestess, I'm not completely sure how to heal your… wounds." Instinctively, your hand came up to touch the skin across your face, which was now rough with cracks and chips. The priestess had been nothing but gentle with you ever since you arrived on Watatsumi, yet you could not help but remain on your guard, giving her small answers of yes and no and letting Kazuha tell the tale for you.

You promised to tell him the truth when you made your way to the shrine, yet you found no time for such things after your arrival, on one side soldiers bombarding you with questions and judgemental assumptions, and on the other guilt eating away at your soul the more you thought about Kazuha. You've lied to him, you've betrayed his trust, you've let him down and yet.. he still dove head first to save you, and you stood and watched him risk his life for you.

"You cannot trouble yourself with my flaws, they shall heal themselves shortly." Kazuha's eyes widened only for a brief second, his lips parting and inhaling sharply, perhaps surprised by the fact that you've already been through this before, or by the way you still mentioned your head high and authority in your voice, still, that was the most you've spoken ever since you arrived at the shrine. You noticed Sangonomiya Kokomi's lips pressing against each other quickly, as though she found your words hard to believe, yet she did not continue any further. Her head turned to the side and she frowned upon noticing the pink hues in the sky. It was already sundown.

"Very well, I will leave Kazuha to show you the way around the Island." She sighed softly, two fingers coming up to massage the bridge of her nose softly and you couldn't help but notice that even her gentle voice had a rough touch to it as she addressed you.

That very same evening you found out that you were supposed to share a space with one of the shrine maidens, so your state, location and intentions could be accounted for at any given time, but Kazuha would not stand for you to be treated as a prisoner on a land priding itself on its freedom. You ended up sharing a smaller home with him for the time being. It had previously been for the soldiers dedicating themselves to the resistance, yet after they did not return form the battle at Nazuchi, it remained vacant.

None of you dared to speak, not while you were eating, not while you were undressing, not while you were in your beds. You knew that all he did was be considerate and give you the time to come to him yourself, yet you wished he would have reached out first, to give you that one small push you needed to unleash everything you've been holding in ever since your brother left.

The samurai remained sitting on the edge of his bed, a book in his hands and a small candle next to him, flickering weakly. You remained laying on your back, eyes open wide and staring at the ceiling. Your hands were clasped together tightly on your abdomen, perhaps a way of stopping yourself from touching your face any longer, as an irritating feeling spread on every single crack. It took you a moment to realise that they began healing and a second for the samurai to notice the unique event.

As your wounds began healing, golden particles, like small little stars, began forming on your skin before slowly floating upwards towards the ceiling, where they faded quickly. Surprised by the sight, Kazuha slowly closed his book and placed it next to him, raising one of his fingers as though to point to the candle and the flame went out immediately, leaving the only source of light evident in the room, the strange stars coming from your skin. "It's impressive, is it not? The shrine maidens back home always told me they'd never seen such a thing." All he could do was hum and his crimson eyes fell from the ceiling to your face, his heart stopping as he noticed you looking right at him. You looked breathtaking, he concluded, even with your skin chipped in certain places and with tired eyes. Your appearance was nothing short of a god's, and he longed to sing about it in his short poems.

"It is." He spoke softly, his whole body moved across the room to come closer to you, and he cautiously sat on the edge of your own bed, staring down at you with a gentle smile, beaconing you to speak. "I've heard plenty say that the Shogun had a child of her own." He tasted the waters with his statement, tilting his head slightly when he noticed you frowning, as though dismissing his words. "I'm afraid I'm at a loss of words when it comes to describing my relationship with the Shogun. I doubt there even is a word for it.. But supposing that I'd have to put it in mortal words, the Shogun would be like a younger sister to me." Noticing his confusion, you smiled yourself, slowly getting up once the golden stars came no longer and once your skin hurt no more. One of your hands came to touch his own, while the other helped you steady yourself up.

After regaining his composure, Kazuha wasted no time in giggling the confusion off his face, witty words taking you aback. "You must be way older than I've anticipated, then, to consider an Archon your younger sister." And you replied right back. "Quite old in fact, but do not confuse the Raiden Shogun for the Archon of Eternity, Ei. They are two completely different beings. Before her reign, Ei used a sacred art to create three beings, meant to help her watch over Inazuma."

"And why is that?" By now the samurai began slowly leaning into you, letting his head rest in your lap and his body on your bed as you told your story. Even if you could not see his face clearly you could not help but notice that he did not seem tired almost at all. It felt as though you were telling a story to a child, forgotten memories of Kunikuzushi insisting on you telling him one of your many stories, unfolding before your eyes as you played with Kazuha's silver locks. "In her pursuit of Eternity, Ei chose to retreat to a domain in her conscience where she could meditate eternally, and she needed someone to watch over the land as she was gone. The first puppet was tasked to carry her gnosis, the second to be the master of Musou No Hitotachi, and the third to handle the affairs of the land posing with the same appearance as Ei."

He took a moment to thank, his breath steady as he hummed as though pensive. "If my intuition does not mislead me, you are the second, is that so?" You hummed right back, showing your approval, and continued your story. "But there had been a major flaw she omitted while creating the first two puppets. She gifted the first one a heart far too gentle for his own good, and he began crying in his sleep. While the second, she gifted with her all memories, to make sure they'd be wise enough while bestowing judgment. From the very moment the second took their very first breath however, their skin began shattering under the pressure of erosion. And so she created the third without any of the errors she's made beforehand. That is how we came into being."

For the rest of the night, you remained with your hands in Kazuha's hair, telling him every ounce of truth you had hidden away, and he listened carefully, allowing his curiosity get the best of him through his questions. As you came to an end to your story, you felt as though your shoulders became lighter, your heart singing with joy in your chest. You asked yourself if this was what freedom felt like..

"Come with me." The samurai spoke out of nowhere, making your eyes drop to his face where you could slightly make out the form of his lips, pulled together in a hopefully smile. "With Beidou and the Crux. We could explore the lands around us and be together until eternity proves mortal, we could… find your brother." His hand reached out to your face, fingers barely tracing the skin on your cheek and as you searched deeper and deeper for a reason to stay, you understood that you could not find a single one. "I.. I'd like that. I want to know what freedom is and I'd like to travel with you.

"I'd like to stop living on lies."

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