#this clip paired up with wally works a little too well for my liking-

[modgirlyreposts-revamped]

Hitting my bestie who I just infected with brainworms for one of my new favorite series with angst of the series

[crowdvscritic]

round up // NOVEMBER 20

Hi, I’m tired. Actually, my friend Celeste created a piece of art that puts the emphasis needed on that sentiment:

I’m very tired. November felt like it was three years and also felt like it went by in a blink and also I’m not sure where October ended and November began—how does time work like that? (I’ve yet to see Tenet, but maybe that will explain it.) But like Michael Scott, somehow I manage, and lately it’s been like this:

Late-night Etsy scrolling. Browsing beautiful, non-big-box-store artwork is very calming just before I go to bed. I’d recommend Etsy stores like Celeste’s chr paperie shop, which I know from experience is full of great Christmas gift ideas. 

Taking a day off of work to do laundry. I’m not sure if it’s more #adulting that I did that or that I was excited to do that.

Eating Ghiradelli chocolate chips straight from the bag. I actually don’t recommend this as a healthy option, but this is also not a health blog.

Watching lots and lots of ‘80s movies. One day I’ll ask a therapist why this decade of films is so comforting for me despite its many flaws, but for now I’m just rolling with it.

Reading. Have you heard of this? It’s a form of entertainment but doesn’t require screens—wild!

Memes. All good Pippin “Fool of a” Took jokes are welcome here.

Leaning into the Christmas spirit by ordering that Starbucks peppermint mocha, making plans to watch everything in that TCM Christmas book I haven’t seen, and keeping the lights on my hot pink tinsel tree on all day as I work from home.

This month’s Round Up is full of stuff that made me smile and stuff that sucked me into its world—I think they’ll do the same for you, too.

November Crowd-Pleasers

Sister Act (1992)

If in four years you aren’t in an emotional state to watch election results roll in, I recommend watching Whoopi Goldberg pretend to be a nun for 100 minutes. (Though, incidentally, if you want to watch that clip edited to specifically depict how the results came in this year, you’ll need to watch Sister Act 2.) This musical-comedy is about as feel-good as it gets, meaning there’s no reason you should wait four more years to watch it. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

Nevada Memes

Speaking of election results, Nevada memes. That’s it—that’s the tweet. Vulture has a round up of some of the best.

SNL Round Up

Laugh and enjoy!

“Cinema Classics: The Birds” (4605 with John Mulaney)

“Uncle Ben” (4606 with Dave Chappelle)

RoboCop (1987)

I’m not surprised I liked RoboCop, but I am surprised at why I liked RoboCop. Not only is this a boss action blockbuster, it’s an investigation into consumerism and the commodification of the human body. It’s also a critique of institutions that treat crime like statistics instead of actions done by people that impact people. That said, it’s also movie about a guy who’s fused with a robot and melts another guy’s face off with toxic sludge, so there’s a reason I’m not listing this under the Critic section. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8/10

Double Feature – ‘80s Comedies: National Lampoon’s Vacation (1983) + Major League (1989)

The ‘80s-palooza is in full swing! In Vacation (Crowd: 9.5/10 // Critic: 8/10), Chevy Chase just wants to spend time with his family on a vacation to Wally World, but wouldn’t you know it, Murphy’s Law kicks into gear as soon as the Griswold family shifts from out of Park. The brilliance of the movie is that every one of these terrible things is plausible, but the Griswolds create the biggest problems themselves. In Major League (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 6.5/10), Tom Berenger, Charlie Sheen, and Wesley Snipes are Cleveland’s last hope for a winning baseball team. Like the Griswolds, mishaps and hijinks ensue in their attempt to prevent their greedy owner from moving the Indians to Miami, but the real win is this movie totally gets baseball fans. Like most ‘80s movies, not everything in this pair has aged well, but they brought some laughs when I needed them most.

This Time Next Year by Sophie Cousens (2020)

They’re born a minute apart in the same hospital, but they don’t meet until their 30th birthday on New Year’s Day. So, yes, it’s a little bit Serendipity, and it’s a little bit sappy, but those are both marks in this book’s favor. This Time Next Year is a time-hopping rom-com with lots of almost-meet-cutes that will have you laughing, believing in romantic twists of fate, and finding hope for the new year.

Double Feature – ‘80s Angsty Teens: Teen Wolf (1985) + Uncle Buck (1989)

In the ‘80s, Hollywood finally understood the angsty teen, and this pair of comedies isn’t interested in the melodrama earlier movies like Rebel Without a Cause were depicting. (I’d recommend Rebel, but not if you want to look back on your teen years with any sense of humor.) In Teen Wolf (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 5/10), Michael J. Fox discovers he’s a werewolf.one that looks more like the kid in Jumanji than any other portrayal of a werewolf you’ve seen. It’s a plot so ‘80s and so bizarre you won’t believe this movie was greenlit.

In Uncle Buck (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 7.5/10), John Candy is attempting to connect with the nieces and nephew he hasn’t seen in years, including one moody high schooler. (Plus, baby Gaby Hoffman and pre-Home Alone Macauley Culkin!) This is my second pick from one of my all-time fave filmmakers, John Hughes (along with National Lampoon’s Vacation, above), and it’s one more entry that balances heart and humor in a way only he could do. You can see where I rank this movie in Hughes’s pantheon on Letterboxd.

Lord of the Rings memes

This month on SO IT’S A SHOW?, Kyla and I revisited The Lord of the Rings, a trilogy we love almost as much as we love Gilmore Girls. You can listen to our episode about the series on your fave podcast app, and you can laugh through hundreds of memes like I did for “research” on Twitter.

Nothing to See Here by Kevin Wilson (2019)

Most adults are afraid of children’s temper tantrums, but can you imagine how terrified you’d be if they caught on fire in their fits of rage? That’s the premise of this novel, which begins when an aimless twentysomething becomes the nanny of a Tennessee politician’s twins who burst into flames when they get emotional. The book is filled with laugh-out-loud moments but never leaves behind the human emotion you need to make a magical realistic story.

An Officer and a Gentlemen (1982)

Speaking of aimless twentysomethings and emotion, feel free to laugh, cry, and swoon through this melodrama in the ‘80s canon. Richard Gere meanders his way into the Navy when he has nowhere else to go, and he tries to survive basic training, work through his family issues, and figure out his future as he also falls in love with Debra Winger. So, yeah, it’s a schamltzier version of Top Gun, but it’s schmaltz at its finest. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 7.5/10

November Critic Picks

Double Feature – ‘40s Amensia Romances: Random Harvest (1942) + The Ghost and Mrs. Muir (1947)

Speaking of schmaltz at its finest, let me share a few more titles fitting that description. In Random Harvest (Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10), Greer Garson falls in love with a veteran who can’t remember his life before he left for war. In The Ghost and Mrs. Muir (Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8.5/10), Gene Tierney discovers a ghost played by a crotchety Rex Harrison in her new home. Mild spoiler: Both feature amnesiac plot developments, and while amnesia has become a cliché in the long history of romance films, Harvest is moving enough and Mr. Muir is charming enough that you won’t roll your eyes. You can see these and more romances complicated by forced forgetfulness in this Letterboxd round up.

The African Queen (1951)

It’s Humphrey Bogart and Katharine Hepburn directed by John Huston—I mean, I don’t feel like I need to explain why this is a winner. Bogart (in his Oscar-winning role) and Hepburn star in a two-hander script, dominating the screen time except for a select few scenes with supporting cast. The pair fight for survival while cruising on a small boat called The African Queen during World War I (in Africa, natch), and the two make this small story feel grand and epic. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

Kind Hearts and Coronets (1949)

A young man’s (Dennis Price) mother is disowned from their wealthy family because she marries for love. After her death, he seeks vengeance by killing all of the family members ahead of him in line to be the Duke D'Ascoyne. The twist? All of his victims are played by Sir Alec Guinness! Almost every character in this black comedy is a terrible person, so you won’t be too sorry to see them go—you can just enjoy the creative “accidents” he stages and stay in suspense on whether our “hero” gets his comeuppance. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

Bluebeard’s Eighth Wife (1937)

What would you do if you found out you were to be someone’s eighth wife? Well, it’s probably not what Claudette Colbert does in this screwball comedy that reminds me a bit of Love Crazy. This isn’t the first time I’ve recommended Colbert, Gary Cooper, or Ernst Lubitsch films, so it’s no surprise these stars and this director can make magic together in this hilarious battle of the wills. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

The Red Shoes (1948)

I love stories about the competition between your life and your art, and The Red Shoes makes that competition literal. Moira Shearer plays a ballerina who feels life is meaningless without dancing—then she falls in love. That’s an oversimplification of a rich character study and some of the most beautiful ballet on film, but I can’t do it justice in a short paragraph. Just watch (perhaps while you’re putting up your hot pink tinsel tree?) and soak in all the goodness. Crowd: 8/10 // Critic: 10/10

The Third Man (1949)

Everybody loves to talk about Citizen Kane, and with the release of Mank on Netflix, it’s newsworthy again. But don’t miss this other ‘40s team up of Joseph Cotten and Orson Welles. Cotten is a writer digging for the truth of his friend’s (Welles) death in a mysterious car accident. Eyewitness accounts differ on what happened, and who was the third man at the scene only one witness remembers? 71 years later, this movie is still tense, and this actor pairing is still electric. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 9/10

The Untouchables (1987)

At the end of October, we lost Sean Connery. I looked back on his career first by writing a remembrance for ZekeFilm and then by watching The Untouchables. (In a perfect world I would’ve reversed that order, but c’est la vie.) In my last selection from the ‘80s, Connery and Kevin Costner attempt to convict Robert De Niro’s Al Capone of anything that will stick and end his reign of crime in Chicago. Directed by Brian De Palma and set to an Ennio Morricone soundtrack, this film is both an exciting action flick and an artistic achievement that we literally discussed in one of my college film classes. Connery won his Oscar, and K. Cos is giving one of the best of his career, too. Crowd: 9/10 // Critic: 9.5/10

Remember the Night (1940)

Fred MacMurray and Barbara Stanwyck in my favorite team up yet! Double Indemnity may be the bona fide classic in the canon, but this Christmas story—with MacMurray as a district attorney prosecuting shoplifter Stanwyck— is a charmer. I’ve added it to my list of must-watch Christmas movies—watch for some holiday cheer and rom-com feels. Crowd: 8.5/10 // Critic: 8.5/10

Photo credits: chr paperie. Books my own. All others IMDb.com.

[queenofcats17]

Outbreak 4

@bornoffireandwisdom had a few more ideas for Outbreak, so here we go again. This’ll probably be the last one. 

Once more Scientific Journalist Murray Hill belongs to @circus-craze

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

Somehow, Wally was still kicking. He’d been infected, yes, due all the scratches and bites Sammy had delivered to him, but he hadn’t yet succumbed to the ink. As such, he’d taken to pitifully limping after Sammy to make sure his friend didn’t hurt anyone else. Most everyone was infected at this point, so his attempts at protection didn’t serve much of a purpose. Except to make Sammy feel even worse about the situation. He was still essentially trapped in his head, watching as his body moved without his input.

“I know you didn’t mean to hurt anybody,” Wally said. Sammy had stopped moving for the moment, so Wally had slumped against a wall. He looked awful. Ink was dribbling out of his mouth and he was pale and sweaty. His breathing had been shallow for quite a while now and when he moved he had to do so slowly. The scratches on his arms and face were bleeding black, not red.

I’m sorry, Wally. I’m so sorry. Sammy sobbed from within his mind. He already felt bad enough about hurting the other employees. But Wally was his best friend. Wally had been there for him for the majority of his life. No matter what, Wally had never abandoned him. Even now, when he was slowly dying because of what Sammy had done to him, Wally still wouldn’t leave him.

“You’re not a bad guy, I know you’re not.” Wally continued. “This is all probably Joey’s fault.” He laughed weakly. “When crazy stuff happens, he’s usually behind it, y’know?”

He was cut off as he launched into a fit of coughing, hacking up some large blobs of ink. Sammy didn’t flinch at this, at least not outwardly. He’d seen others succumb to the infection before.

“Aw geez.” Wally groaned. “This is even worse than that time I got chickenpox.” Sammy didn’t react, continuing to stare ahead like a machine on standby. 

“Man, you’re even quieter than you usually are.” Wally laughed once more, again interrupted by a coughing fit. He went quiet for a bit, coughing intermittently. 

“I’m sorry, Sammy.” He finally said, looking up at his friend. “I never should’ve let this happen to you.”

I’m the one who should be apologizing. Sammy sighed. I did this to you. I hurt you. I hurt everyone. You didn’t do anything wrong. 

“I mean, I know there’s probably nothing I could’ve done to stop it, but...Still...” Wally smiled. “You’re my best friend. I told myself I’d always keep you safe.” His eyelids were beginning to flutter now. His strength was ebbing. 

“Y’know, I’m feeling pretty tired now.” He feigned a yawn. ��I think...I think I’m gonna take a nap.”

No! Don’t go to sleep! Sammy tried to force the words out. You’ll die if you sleep!

“Just gonna...Take a quick...rest...” Wally mumbled, laying down. Soon enough, he was fast asleep. Sammy watched his chest rise and fall in a constant rhythm. A smile tugged at the corner of his lips. Leave it to Wally to fall asleep in the middle of an apocalypse. He’d always envied how incredibly carefree Wally could be.

“Sleep...Well...” He croaked, leaning down to pat Wally’s head. 

.

Elsewhere, Joey had departed from level 14 to check up on Murray. He was in a particularly good mood after his successful taunting of Norman and wanted to check on Murray’s progress to further boost his mood. He was sure Murray had made some observations, especially since practically the entire studio was infected by this point. 

“Mr. Hill, how are things coming along?” He asked, striding into Murray’s makeshift lab. The scientist was standing off a Searcher who’d been placed on a table, just staring into the creature’s eyes.

“Mr. Hill?” Joey stopped just behind him, putting a hand on his shoulder. Murray yelped, stumbling away from both the Searcher and Joey. He would have fallen into a small clump of Searchers (they’d formed a little lump, almost like they were huddling together) if Joey hadn’t caught him by the arm. 

“Is something wrong, Mr. Hill?” Joey raised an eyebrow as he set Murray back on his feet. “You’re awfully jumpy.”

“Oh, um, I’m fine.” Murray laughed nervously, starting to visibly sweat. “What, um, what can I do for you?”

“I came to check on your progress.” Joey withdrew his hand, his expression remaining skeptical. “I do hope everything is going well.” There was an underlying threat to his words that made Murray whimper quietly.

“Everything’s going great!” Murray clapped his hands together. “The infection is progressing very well!”

“Do they have any lingering control?” Joey asked, casting a glance back at the clump of Searchers. 

“I...don’t believe so.” Murray looked back at the Searchers as well. “They seem to lose all sense of self and individuality when the infection takes over.”

“And do they follow orders?”

“I haven’t tested that yet,” Murray admitted. “You’re the one they’re supposed to listen to, so I couldn’t really do it without you.”

“Well, I know at least one listens to me.” Joey smiled gleefully as a shape rose from the floorboards. It didn’t look any different than any of the other Searchers, but Murray figured it had to be someone important. Why else would Joey be keeping them with him?

“You’ve been remarkably cooperative, haven’t you, Miss Benton?” Joey cooed, patting the Searcher’s head. Murray’s stomach dropped. 

“Miss...Benton?” Murray asked. 

“Yes.” Joey gave him an eerie smile. “She put up quite a fight, but in the end, I won.” His glee was decidedly unsettling, cementing Murray’s belief in the inevitability of his own death. 

“I still need to make sure the others are falling in line, though.” Joey’s smile vanished as he shifted to a more businesslike state. “We can’t have any pockets of resistance.” We. There was no we, Murray thought bitterly. There was only Joey. 

He stood to the side as Joey began to test the obedience of the assembled Searchers. He smiled at the appropriate times, trying to hide his growing fear and unease. It was sickening watching Joey jerk these people around like puppets on a string. These were people he reminded himself. They weren’t mindless slaves. They had lives and feelings and dreams. And Murray had helped take all of that away from them. Joey’s voice broke him from his brooding. 

“I must say, Mr. Hill, I’m impressed.” He said as the Searchers moved across the room. “Your virus has done everything you promised and more.”

“I’m glad you’re satisfied, Mr. Drew.” Murray smiled shakily. “But how do you know they’re following orders? All you’ve really done is make them move around the room.”

“I can see through their eyes,” Joey replied, a malicious gleam in his eyes. “Not just the ones in here. I can see through all of their eyes. Trust me, they’re following orders.” 

“Ah.” The word was short and clipped as if he’d had to force it out. More a vocalization than an actual word, really. Just what on Earth was Joey making them do?

Suddenly, two Searchers entered. To Murray’s horror, the ink hadn’t covered enough of their bodies for them to be recognizable. It was Shawn Flynn and Grant Cohen. Both had very clearly transitioned into being Searchers, judging from their eyes and the bulging black veins across their bodies, but the ink was still consuming them. One of Grant’s legs had already been turned to ink, so he limped as he followed Shawn in.

“Oh, look, Miss Benton!” Joey pointed gleefully at the sorry pair. “Your friends are part of our family now! Isn’t that nice?” Murray felt sick at seeing Joey’s joy. Would Joey be that delighted at his demise? He felt as though he already knew the answer to that question. Even if he never wronged Joey, this was the fate awaiting him. Death and ink.

“Mr. Drew...Are you sure we’re doing the right thing?” The words were out of his mouth before he could stop himself. Joey stopped what he’d been doing, essentially making the corruption on Shawn and Grant speed up, and turned to Murray. 

“Not having second thoughts, are you?” He asked. His smile was sweet on the surface, but Murray couldn’t help but feel that there was danger lurking below that sweetness.

“No! Not at all!” Murray put his hands up in defense. “It’s just...Some of the employees have been, well, cursing me? And you?”

“Don’t pay them any mind.” Joey waved his hand dismissively. “They simply don’t understand.”

“Of course, of course.” Murray let out a high pitched laugh. “So, um, is there anything else I can do for you?”

“No, I think that’s enough for today.” Joey patted his shoulder. “Keep up the good work, Mr. Hill.” He gave him a wink before disappearing out the door. 

It took Murray a moment or two to remember that he had to breathe after Joey left. He took a few deep breaths, leaning against the wall.

“What am I doing?” He murmured. He got no answer.

.

Jack wasn’t entirely sure what was going on. He’d fallen asleep and now everything was...weird. Not necessarily bad, but...weird. His head felt all fuzzy and he couldn’t necessarily remember what had happened to him that day. He was pretty sure he might have gone for a swim? He remembered a lot of liquid. Oh well, it was probably fine. Everyone was acting rather strange, though. A lot of people were crying and screaming, especially when they saw him. Some other people were also attacking the screaming and crying people. Jack stayed away from those people. He’d never really liked conflict.

He started to make his way through the studio, unsure of where exactly he was going. He just sort of wanted to wander. His songwriting area had been flooded, so he couldn’t really hang out there. He had to find somewhere else to go. Somewhere quiet. Jack had always liked the quiet. He was a rather shy person, so he tended to prefer staying away from large crowds. There were more crowds than there usually were. He wasn’t sure why everyone was clumping together like this. Didn’t they have work to do? Well, he probably had work to do too. But if Sammy needed him for something he could come find him.

He ended up in the Heavenly Toys area. It looked rather like a fight had happened. Cutouts were broken, there was ink everywhere, and some of the shelves had been knocked over. Jack frowned. What on Earth could have done this? That was when he heard the sound of someone crying. 

“It’s okay, Alli, we’re going to be okay.” Another soft voice came from further in. It was coming from behind the shelves, through the door to the Alice Angel meet and greet area. Jack oozed through the cracks and into the room (although he wasn’t entirely sure how he’d done that) to see who was crying. 

He found Allison and Thomas sitting on the ground with their backs against the window to Alice Angel’s area. They both looked exhausted. Their clothing was ripped and covered in ink, they had scratches and bites all over their bodies, and their hair was disheveled and wild. Allison was the one who was crying, although Thomas looked as though he was seriously considering it himself. Thomas had a pipe laying beside him while Allison had a sword propped up next to her. 

Jack made a concerned noise, moving closer. Almost immediately, the couple’s attention snapped to Jack. Before he knew what was happening, they both had their weapons raised.

“What do you want?” Allison demanded, pointing the sword toward Jack. Jack whimpered, backing away. He’d never considered Allison to be an intimidating person, but seeing her with a sword that she very clearly knew how to use definitely changed that. 

“Did Joey send you to finish us off?” Allison advanced on him, only to falter and almost fall. Thomas quickly caught her, gently lowering her to the ground. 

“If you’re here to finish us off, do it.” Thomas didn’t even look at Jack as he spoke. “We can’t fight anymore.” Jack made another concerned noise, moving closer to put a hand on Allison’s shoulder. She jerked away and he withdrew his hand. 

“Why aren’t you attacking us?” Allison asked, turning a bit so she could see Jack better. 

Jack frowned. Why would he attack them? He wasn’t violent. The sound he made was indignant. At least, it was supposed to be. It was hard to communicate using only sounds. Why couldn’t he talk?

“He’s biding his time,” Thomas grumbled, although there was a hint of uncertainty in his voice.

“I...I don’t think he’s like the others.” Allison gently disentangled herself from Thomas and scooted over to Jack. “Are you hurt us?” 

Jack fervently shook his head, almost dislodging his hat. 

“You...really aren’t here to hurt us?” Thomas asked. Jack shook his head again.

“I think I recognize this hat.” Allison patted Jack’s hat. “Is that you, Jack?”

“Fain? The songwriter?” Thomas frowned. Jack nodded excitedly, clapping his hands together and making happy noises. 

Allison’s expression softened. “It’s good to see you, Jack.” 

Jack wanted to ask what had happened, but he felt like it would be rude to force them to relive whatever horrors they’d already gone through. Not to mention, he couldn’t really talk. So he stayed with them, providing silent companionship. Although Thomas was still wary, he allowed Jack to sit near them as they returned to their position under the window. There wasn’t much talking to be done. Jack couldn’t talk, and Allison and Thomas seemed too tired to talk. 

“I guess we’re going to die here, huh?” Allison let out a laugh that failed to sound anything but mournful. 

“I guess we are.” Thomas was stoic, as always, but Jack could have sworn he saw a faint tremble in the other man’s lip. Jack touched their legs as if to assure them that he was there.

“Thank you, Jack.” Allison smiled slightly and patted his head. “You’re a sweetheart.” Jack made a happy trill, perking up at her praise. 

As the minutes slowly passed, Jack could hear the couple’s heartbeats slowly getting weaker. They were drifting in and out of consciousness, holding each other’s hands. It had only really just hit Jack that they were going to die. He’d heard them say it, heard them discuss it, but he’d just now realized it. He whimpered, curling up between the two of them. He didn’t know them all that well, but he didn’t want them to die. They seemed like nice people. Even Tom, for all his gruffness, didn’t seem like a bad guy. He seemed more fed up with Joey than anything else. Was this what had happened to the other people? Was this what had happened to him?

Eventually, the heartbeats stopped. Jack whimpered, prodding at their bodies. When prodding didn’t work, he started shaking them gently. He knew it wouldn’t do any good. But still...He hoped they’d jolt back to life. That Thomas would tell him not to get so close. But they didn’t. They just laid there. Cold. Still. Jack felt rather like crying. He’d never seen a dead body before, much less two. He’d watched them die. Dear gods, he’d watched them die. 

It was a little longer before Joey appeared. Jack flinched away, whimpering. Joey was giving off an aura that he really wasn’t comfortable with. 

“My my, Mr. Fain. Did you finish the deed?” Joey asked, striding in. Jack whimpered again, pressing himself into a corner. 

“Ah, well.” Joey turned his back on him, grabbing Allison and Thomas by the ankles. “I have some work to do. I hope you’ll excuse me.” He departed, dragging the bodies on the ground. Jack stayed where he was long after Joey was gone. He didn’t know what to do or where to go. He wanted to go back to his safe place. He wanted to be safe again. 

He disappeared into a puddle, going back to the sewers. He wanted to stay there. Stay there until the fears and memories went away. 

[chimmychanga1225]

Homeless: Damijon (3)

It’s slow as hell, but whatever. Hope you enjoy.

———

After bidding goodbye, the group began introductions for Jon, starting with none other than Wally. “Hi, my name’s Wallace, but you can call me Sir.”

Kate hit him upside the head, pulling laughs out of Calvin and Barbara. “Ignore brat #2. My name’s Kate Kane.”

“Oh, nice to meet you,” Jon said shyly. “I’m Jon Samuel Kent.”

“Wow, busting out the middle and last name? What now, you gonna give us your social security?”

“Do you have any limits, Wallace? Because you’re currently reaching mine,” Kate growled. Wally’s eyes went comically wide, as he backed off.

“On an unrelated note,” he began, “gotta blast.” Brat #2 sped out of the room and building, clearly not taking any chances with the red head.

Kate’s demeanor quickly shifted from full take down mode to the lowest-amount-of-threatening-she could-manage mode as she turned to Jon. “Hmm, Jon Samuel, right?”

Jon nodded earnestly. “J.S..... Consider yourself officially dubbed Jesus,” Kate decided, not an ounce of humor in her expression.

“W-What,” Jon asked, confused by the girl’s reasoning. He looked to Calvin and Barbara for help, but while Barbara could just barely stifle her laughs, Calvin sighed. “It’s Kate. No one can really follow her thought process. It’s a miracle we haven’t sent her in for testing.”

“You know you love it, Nemo. Now let’s go. We have to find Brat #2 and give Jesus a tour. I’ll take Babs,” and with that, Kane and Barbara strutted out of the room.

———

“We only go to one floor in the Wayne building, so there really isn’t a need to show you anything else here besides nook and crannies fool of spider webs and trash,” Barbara informed. She took her hands from her lap and held Kate’s as she pushed her chair along the crumbly walk way leading away from the building. “However, we still need to take you around town to show you the hot spots.”

“Hot spots,” Jon weakly reiterated. He couldn’t help but feel terribly lost. The whole method to enter the building alone made his head feel jumbled, but mapping out the city too? These people were severely over estimating his ability.

Calvin gave Jon a “comforting” (painful) clap on the back, along with a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry too much about, kid. You’ll be able to pick it up after a while.”

A thought suddenly occurred to Jon. “Kid? Wait, how old are all of you?”

“Babs and I are 19. Calvin’s 17. Brat #2 is 15, but likes to act like he’s older than everyone else,” Kate told him, idly playing with the hands linked to her’s.

“You’re all so young,” Jon stated, surprise etched all over his face.

“What did you expect? Senior citizens?”

“No, I just... nevermind.”

Kate shrugged, not bothering with the newbie. She instead focused her attention on Barbara’s scratched up glasses. The pair steadily pushed ahead of the group, leaving Calvin and Jon in the dust.

“I know it’s a sensitive topic for some people,” Calvin said slowly, as if not to scare Jon away, “but how’d you get here?”

“Nothing special. Just the usual,” Jon brushed off the statement as best as he could.

“There’s no usual way to get homeless, Jon. We all have stories. If you don’t want to share just yet, that’s fine. But my advice is to be prepared to spill later. Damian will get the truth out of you one way or another.” Calvin turned away from the other, jogging ahead to catch up with Kate and Barbara.

“Looking forward to it,” Jon grumbled.

———

Damian was sure of it. He was going to kill someone before his shift ended. “Excuse me,” a customer screeched in his face, “we’ve been waiting for our order for over ten minutes. What’s the hold up!?”

The teen tried his best to keep his composure. “I’m sorry, ma’am. Unfortunately, we’re a little backed up in the kitchen. Please excuse me.” Damian dismissed himself to the back, hearing the woman’s grumbling the entire way. Only when he was finally out of sight did he kick the shit out of the wall. “Fuckin hate this job,” he growled, throwing one more solid kick at the wall. After getting all his energy and anger out, he collapsed down on the worn down tiles of the kitchen to pull out a cigarette. “Sounds like it’s someone’s time of the month. You aren’t allowed to smoke here, you know,” an obnoxious voice rang out.

“Shut up, Tim.”

“It’s against the establishment’s policy to smo-,” Damian cut him off.

“It’s a McDonald’s, Timothy. Get over yourself.”

Tim quickly snatched the pack and cigarette from Damian, tucking them away in his apron. “It’s bad for you, anyways,” he lectured.

Damian stood up, dangerously glaring at Tim. Not that it made much of a difference, with the relatively wide gap between their heights. “Give then back.”

“Back to work,” Tim simply ordered.

It’s truly a miracle Damian hasn’t killed someone yet.

———

“I’m off,” Damian said to no one in particular. He took his weekly payment with him, stuffing it into one of the many pockets in his second hand jacket.

“Wait up,” someone yelled from behind.

Damian strode ahead, determined not waste anymore of his time at the “establishment” or with its “associates”.

“Damian, wait!”

“Ugh, what do you want Timothy?”

“If you’re done acting like a child, here.” Tim places the Marlboro pack in Damian’s hand, before retreating back in the direction of his car. “See you next week, Damian.”

“Whatever.” As much as he disliked the goody two shoes, Damian couldn’t hate Timothy. He’s only been working for a few months with Tim, and he’s already treating the other like a younger brother. Either way, Damian was grateful. “Thanks,” he called out, although Tim was already long gone.

Damian shook the box, trying to get it to dispense a cigarette when instead he got a little rolled up note instead.

You should really stop smoking, D. You’ll get sick. But I did leave a few essentials in the box. :P

- T

Damian tore the box apart only to find a wad of cash clipped to... a pad? “You’re dead, Timothy.”

———

“I’m back,” Damian called out, sounding only moments away from collapsing.

“How was work? Did you get paid,” Barbara badgered. Damian groaned in response, raising an envelope in the air. Kate swiped it from his hands to bring it to Barbara. “You’re welcome,” he muttered.

He walked past the two as they counted out his pay, and collapsed on his cot. “You guys show new kid around?”

Calvin came around to Damian’s area, sitting by his corpse, basically. “We showed him the ropes and everything, but he’s still pretty tight lipped. He’s hanging with Wallace for the moment.”

“And Wallace is where?”

“To be determined.”

“Fabulous,” Damian grunted with effort as he pushed himself up. “We should probably go find those two before they set the city on fire or do something else stupid.”

“Do we have to chase after them every time he does something idiotic,” Kate complained. “I don’t want to play babysitter 24/7.”

“Fine. Damian and I can go while you and Babs stay here, in case they come back or if someone calls. Cool?”

“Awesome,” Barbara exclaimed dryly. She was too focused on budgeting the necessities for next week to worry about everyone else. “See you later.”

———

“Wally, I don’t think this is a great idea,” Jon said, stressfully checking their surroundings. “What if we get caught?”

“C’mon Jon, it’s only stealing if they really need the money. We’re at a private gym. There no doubt hear people can spare a 20 or two with their fancy pool memberships.

“Yeah,” Jon said still not entirely convinced.

“If you’re so nervous, let me show you how it’s done, newbie. I’ll be back in a flash,” Wally took off before Jon could protest.

Wally walked through the changing room casually, as if he belonged there. Jon was almost impressed by the other’s bullshit capabilities.

Wally whistled away as he walked by the security lockers. Only after a minute of two of waiting for the hall to clear out, did he start fiddling with one of the locks. Just seconds later did the cubby unlock with a small pop. Wally sent a wicked grin to Jin as he held up a wallet. At least until Wally heard a “Just what do you think you’re doing” from behind him.

Wally’s instincts kicked in, getting him to run but the man behind him already grabbed him by his hoodie’s collar and slammed him on the ground, head first. Jon felt his heart drop as he heard the sickening crack. And just when he thought it was over, the man began to kick him in the ribs while he was down.

“Scum like you shouldn’t even be in here,” he fumed, sending a kick after every word. Jon rushed in, covering Wally’s body with his own. “Stop! Please just stop! We won’t bother you again, so please...”

“Be grateful I didn’t call the cops.” The man sauntered off rather quickly as he and Jon realized Wally wasn’t getting up. “Wally? Wally?!”

———

Well that’s it for now. Bye.

[abakersquest]

CHAPTER THIRTY – AT THE HEART OF ALL THINGS

The sound of cannon fire and whirling propellers dulled only slightly as Wally and Gan dove into the waiting bay of the airship. It was, however, readily replaced by the booming voice of Captain Blackeye, although neither Wally nor Gan could see where his voice came from.

“Is the cargo aboard, Miss Orland?”

Rozzi held a small brass object in her hand and thumbed a small toggle on the side. “And then some Captain, close up and get us out of here!”

Gan watched in awe as the thick metal ramp they’d passed now swung up on its own. He couldn’t begin to imagine how it worked, as he bounced excitedly on the spot taking in his surroundings as fast as he could. He was inside a ship that could fly. This thing made seemingly from metal stayed in the air like it was meant to be there, when everything he knew about metal and flying told him that was impossible. He turned back toward Wally, a million burgeoning questions struggling to be first in line, only to have them turned away at the door when he saw the look on the wallaby’s face.

He’d seen it before, on the faces of fellow scouts coming home after long days out on the Drifts. It was always a warm yet apologetic smile that tried to acknowledge the regret they’d been gone, and convey the joy of coming home again. When he dared to turn toward the other Animani in the room, he saw the same, with what looked like forced anger to him. He knew that one quite well thanks to his sister. He also knew those moments were a good time to shut your beak.

“Sorry,” was the first thing Wally said. “I know you’re probably upset I’ve been out of touch, but got a bit banged up on the way. In fact, if it wasn’t for Gan here and his family I might’ve been even worse off. I probably should’ve been more-”

Rozzi interrupted by closing the gap between them, and wrapping her arms tightly around him.

With clenched teeth forced into a smile, not daring to mention the bruising his ribs had received, he hugged her back.

Eventually Rozzi opened her eyes and saw Gan, trying desperately to give them privacy while not knowing how to leave the room they were in. The flustered Orni’Hulan hopped on the spot to try and figure out what he should do.

“Gan, was it?” Rozzi spoke up at last, almost spooking a few feathers off him.

“Ah-um, y-yes Ma’am,” he quickly bowed his head as he assumed any knightly gentleman would. “Gan Noi’Goa.”

She parted from Wally at last and walked over to Gan. She amicably tousled the feathers on his head and said, “Thanks for keepin’ our Wally out of the dirt, Mister Noi’Goa.”

Suddenly feeling rather bashful, Gan could only nod in response.

Before the friendly moment could continue there was the sound of thunder, followed by the entire ship suddenly dipping by a foot.

The Captain’s voice rang out through the whole of the ship. “SOME BIG ANGRY THING JUST DROPPED ITSELF ON TOP OF US, ANYONE ABLE T’ REACH A TOPSIDE EXIT T’ DEAL WITH IT?”

Rozzi looked over to the ladder that lead to the top of the ship from the cargo bay then back to Wally. “Mind introducin’ me to your new friends, Sir Wally?”

Wally dropped his pack and tightened the strap of the Flare’s hilt. “Don’t think you’ll like them much, they can be a bit rude.”

“That’s fine,” she smirked. “I can be a bit rude back.”

Wally headed toward the ladder. “Gan, you hang back for now in case we need help knocking them off.”

“Yes sir!”

Rozzi held up the brass box once more. “We’re on it captain, just keep her steady as y’ can.” She carefully tucked the small box away.

Making his way up the ladder, Wally spoke. “We need to be careful; these two look a lot more serious than that pangolin. For starters, one of them’s a gorilla.”

“A gorilla?” Rozzi replied incredulously, following behind him. “Who’da thought those were real…”

As Wally took hold of the hatch, the ship shook again, its engines revving loudly to counter the disruption to the ships flight. Once the turbulence settled, Wally looked down to Rozzi and held up three fingers. With a nod she began to pool magic into her off hand. Silently they counted down, Wally threw open the hatch, and a blast of air carried them both up and out, the mystic gale deflecting the quick shot of lightning and ice daggers that came to greet them.

The pair landed a few feet from the hatch, Rozzi’s magic keeping the wind sheer off them. “You’re damn persistent folk, I’ll give you that much!” Wally shouted. “But I’m afraid we’re going to have to ask you to leave!”

Ahead of them, Noin loomed undaunted by the winds. His small koala compatriot clinging to his shoulder. With a stony glare, he slapped one of his massive hands onto the top of the ship, calling out “ION STALKER!” A flat surge of electricity danced back and forth, tracing a jagged and difficult to follow line toward Rozzi forcing her to dive out of the way, her curtain of air yanked away from Wally.

Forced to almost shut his eyes and pin back his ears, Wally barely had a sense he could count on as the air rushing over the ship pushed against him at full force. The smooth metal surface offered nothing to dig his feet into, nor traction to slow him even as he tried to anchor down with his tail. With no other choice, he punched the Flare into the hull to hold his place.

“Now Phas! Cut him off!” Noin shouted over the din of rushing air and spinning props.

“GLACIAL WAKE!” A blast of icy coldness burst from the koala’s outstretched arm issuing forth a towering wall of ice, dividing Wally and Rozzi.

With a quick glance behind himself, Wally knew he’d only have enough time to make one move without flying off the back of the ship. Ready for the loss of footing, he fired off a ball of flame that curved clean around the approaching Noin and Phas.

Phas cackled, “You’re kidding right? You couldn’t have had a bigger target and you still missed?”

With a grunt of effort and inches away from falling off, Wally drove the Flare into the ship’s armor once again, and simply replied; “No.”

The ball of flame continued on its elliptical course and crashed against the wall of ice, evaporating a layer of it instantly. The Halcyon knights quickly turned to face it, and a cyclone of ice shards and steam exploded outward from the impact site quickly followed by Rozzi.

“You goons always do this y’ know!” She landed and took a casual stance. “Send the best y’ have after Wally first and flat out ignore the rest of us like we ain’t a threat.”

“Hardly!” Phas launched an ice dagger from her perch, its unique spiral cutting through the constant gale. Rozzi however sneered as she easily danced around the thrown knife.

“Please! I’ve been dodgin’ throwin’ knives since I could walk!” she turned the blade of her sickle inward over her forearm, wrapping a length of its chain around the rest. “But this trick here? Brand new.”

Water pooled in an invisible mold above Phas extended hand becoming an icy spear she launched with a single motion.

A whirlwind formed around Rozzi’s chained arm as she spun on her heels. The whirling winds snagging the leading edge the flying spear and forced it to move as Rozzi dictated. With a flourish she sent it right back to its creator while shouting, “CYCLONE TURNABOUT!”

Noin’s storm magic aided reflexes let him catch the spear, but not before panic set into his passenger, causing her grip to loosen momentarily. Rozzi’s spell of wind funneled around the gorilla’s arm and over his shoulder, knocking the unbalanced Phas clean off and sending her rolling across the top of the ship before Noin could grab her.

Just as the mighty gorilla readied to chase after her before she could fall, she drove a dagger into the hull to stop her tumble, leaving her right next to Wally.  However the imprecise strike was far too shallow and any jostle, any motion could loosen its purchase. She tried to pull herself up only to cause the dagger to almost slip out.

Noin froze on the spot, he knew if he tried to rush over to her the impact of his footsteps could cause her to fall. Literally anything he did would be enough to knock her loose and send her falling toward definite injury and possible death.

“TAKE MY HAND!” Wally shouted as he reached toward her.

Rozzi, Phas, and Noin, in what may very well be the only thing they would ever do equally, all shouted, “WHAT?!”

Holding himself upright with the Flare, sliding slowly closer to Phas, Wally stretched as much as he could while maintaining his anchor. “I’LL HELP YOU UP! JUST TAKE MY HAND!”

Phas stared at the wallaby almost dumbfounded, looking back to Noin just as the dagger slipped free and she began to fall.

“PHAS!” Noin cried out, heedlessly rushing forward and diving after her.

The flying gorilla’s shoulder clipped Wally, knocking him backward slightly, the Flare cutting further into the plating of the ship, leaving him at an angle overlooking the decent of the Halcyon Knights. Somehow, Noin had caught up to Phas, wrapping his arms around her just as a Dark Vault slid open ahead of them. Its inky blackness saved them from a painful reunion with the island below.

Rozzi rushed over, the aura of calm air around her finally letting Wally right himself. The earlier hit aggravated his chest wound; he couldn’t mask the wince and sound of pain rising out of his throat.

“… Y’mind tellin’ me what that was all about then?”

“Oh… The Smith hit me in the chest with his hammer so I’m still a little sore.”

“No Wally, the OTHER thing!”

Wally couldn’t help but look back to where the two had vanished. “They love each other. I honestly wasn’t sure that’s what I was feeling before, but now I am. They might be against us, but they’re fighting as hard for what they believe in as we are… I just couldn’t let her drop.”

“So they ain’t all…” Rozzi contorted her face oddly and made some gruesome guttural noises.

“If that was supposed to mean mind control, the answer’s no.” Wally started walking toward the hatch, just then realizing the mystic ice wall had vanished along with its creator before his eyes finally settled on Rozzi.

He’d been entirely distracted this whole time, staying alive tends to narrow one’s attention after all. It wasn’t until just this moment he saw she was wearing something completely different. Her usual loose clothing and hand wrappings had been remade with light bits of extra armor added in, shimmering bright silver on her arms and calves that perfectly offset the darker colors she always wore. As he was taking in the details of the armor, he saw her hip jut to one side. Instantly his eye-level rose to her own, quickly realizing she’d struck a bit of a pose.

Despite his best effort, every ounce of personal growth evaporated for just long enough to turn him back into a bashful, gibbering idiot.

“Always nice to know I can catch you off guard.” Rozzi giggled, gently tapping Wally on the nose before turning. “C’mon Mister Walter, everyone’s dyin’ to see you.”

Rozzi was the first one down through the thankfully undamaged hatch, ignoring the ladder entirely and hopping down. Her first sight inside, a pair of storm magic infused kukri knives held at the ready.

Gan sighed in relief and quickly tucked them away.

She smiled and crossed her hands behind her head. “I really wish I could say that was the first time I’d walked into a place and had knives pointed at me. But I ain’t six and you ain’t a thievin’ landlord.”

“Huh?”

“Story for when you’re older.”

Wally took the ladder down slowly, since it always seemed to him no one ever wanted to converse with anyone on a ladder, it gave him time to think. The first rung, ‘where should we be headed? Stormyard maybe?’ Second rung, ‘what should I do about Gan? Do we have the time to turn around and take him back home?’ Of course, there’d never be enough rungs to straighten every thought he had, and lingering on a ladder too long would make him look far more wounded than he actually was. So he just had to be content with getting through half a thought when the floor made itself undeniably present beneath his feet.

“Speakin’ of stories for later, it’s high time a certain someone tells us what he knows.” Rozzi spoke as she took Wally by the arm.

“Right, there are a few things I overheard I think everyone should hear.”

“Oh I didn’t mean you, Wally.”

---

The ship was an astonishing contrast to the stark, utilitarian thinking that went into the Aegis’ Interior. Intricate metalwork decorated every light fixture and passage, a clear sense of artistic endeavor in every inch of the decorated and gold trimmed walls. Wally wasn’t certain if wallpaper had ever been meant for metal walls, but it certainly was a lovely pattern that made for a much more comfortable experience overall. Ultimately, it felt more like moving through a beloved family home than the heavily armed flying battleship it actually was.

A door slid open ahead of them and out stepped Wistea, her preferred ornate robes now graced by a breastplate and pauldrons. Her face lit up as she caught sight of the wayward wallaby. “Wally! Oh thank goodness, I was terrified we would have had to go through the wreckage of that awful ship to find you. Only a small part of it was above water by the time we came close to Orni’Hu.”

Wally smiled back but then blinked in confusion. “Hang on; I only received Cinera’s call this morning. How did you know it was coming here?”

“Actually that is quite the fascinating turn of events! You see when the airship left and the others were making their way out of the mountain stronghold they found someone who told us where to go and gave us this ship to get there, it was none other than-“

“ROLLO PODA!” Shouted Argus from behind.

“ARGUS!” Wistea stomped her foot. “Stop finishing my sentences!”

“Can I help it? I’m as excited as you are!” Argus sidled past Gan, which was the only amount of attention he spared toward him. “There we were, making our way back from the destroyed launch platform, the guards outside surging in to cease the hostilities when Polly said she heard something. That’s Light Mages for you, incredible senses. We follow her lead and there, in a small cell, we find the Shining Star of Insicai himself!”

Wally looked up at him curiously. “Is that why you decided to come with us then?”

“Oh that and many other reasons… Ah, such a tearful goodbye, you should’ve seen it. I swear I heard violins as I waved goodbye to my darling Siani. But the world’s in peril and I certainly couldn’t stand idly by when I could do something about it!”

“He gave a big speech while we were taking off,” Rozzi grumbled.

“I honestly hope I do not sound as pompous as you do when I give lectures.” Wistea sighed.

“Bah, my heartfelt declaration to my people was lost on the lot of you travel weary adventurers.” Argus hand snapped like a rubber band from Wally’s shoulder to Gan. “You there! You’ve still got the aura of youth and idealism. I’m certain you’d appreciate my soliloquy of departure.”

The young Orni’Hulan shrank under the grasshopper’s attention. “I… I’m sorry I don’t know what that means…”

“Pretty sure it’s fancy talk for, ‘lots of hot air.’” Rozzi quipped.

Wistea giggled as Argus antenna twitched in annoyance before he stopped to look over Gan. “… I don’t know you…”

“My name is Gan Noi’Goa,” He respectfully bowed his head. “I’m Sir Wally’s squire!”

Some day some great scholar may be able to discern the exact weight one feels when someone looks at them with their full attention, per eye. For now, Wally simply felt as if a ten ton weight had been dropped onto his shoulders, his chance to politely deal with the matter of Gan evaporating before him.

With a resigned sigh, Wally spoke up. “Gan is uniquely talented and strong for his age. I promised his father I’d let him guide me to He’Lain Outpost then send him on his way home.”

Gan took in a deep breath, about to argue his case.

“But,” Wally continued. “He’s not going to listen to any of us when we tell him to leave. So instead of trying to send him away and having him follow us secretly where we can’t keep him safe. It’s best we keep him close.”

Gan huffed loudly, it sounded to him like he was to be treated as cargo, rather than an aide.

Wally patted him on the head, much in the way he remembered doing for his brother and sister years ago. “Especially since a good squire knows when it’s best to act, and when he should stand back and learn from his elders. Right, Gan?”

He stood a little taller, tried to keep his expression serious only to have it turn into the broadest grin his beak could offer before finally nodding. “Yes sir!”

“Well!” Argus clapped all four of hands. “That matter settled, let us make haste to the bridge and see if we can’t get that old pill bug to spill his secrets at last!”

Wistea shook her head with a subtle smile. “While I do not share your word choice, I am certainly excited as well.”

Heading toward the bridge, Argus and Wistea began some historical debate as Gan tried to take in everything they were saying. Wally felt Rozzi’s grip on his arm tighten, and a familiar oddity crossed his preternatural senses. It was something he felt the last time they sat together that first night in the Salt Barrens. He’d been waiting for her to say anything about it, not wishing to invade the privacy of her thoughts with his mystic insight.

Thankfully, the bridge of the airship and its current occupants made for an excellent distraction from that growing anticipation. A glass dome sat in the middle of it on a metal pillar, a gleaming image somehow hovering inside, with a small representation of the ship at its center. Beside it, Polly turned a few dials on the attached panel, causing the image to change size. “Ah, there it is… Grandpa I think I finally got this thing figured out! If this blue part here is an air pocket we should turn to port for five minutes then return to course.

Blackeye, standing before a large bay of windows revealing the broad open sky ahead and a large ship’s wheel chortled softly. “That’s my girl, already got that machine to sing for ya, eh?”

“Kinda…” She rubbed the back of her head. “I still can’t remember all the words that lil’ fella used to say where things are.”

“‘Up’ and ‘down’ are good enough, far as I’m concerned. Frankly, I think I’m takin’ to flyin’ a little too well. Ain’t gonna be easy givin’ this back once we’re done.”

“Nonsense, Captain Blackeye. I wouldn’t dream of taking it back. Especially since it’s a living tribute to your legendary vessel. The ‘God’s Providence’ is yours, free and clear.”

The responding voice was entirely new to Wally, despite ironically sounding quite old. It came from another passage leading to the bridge, as did the familiar sound of a sturdy bit of iron working in place of a leg. It wasn’t his father, of course, but a very short Insicai, possibly the shortest he’d ever seen. His antenna, long and curled, drooped into his line of sight, and the dark natural armor of his back gave him a permanent hunch. In his hand was a large iron walking stick, the very thing that fooled Wally’s ear. There could be no doubt in his mind that this must’ve been the illustrious Rollo Poda himself.

Behind him strode Hector, his armor sporting additions that resembled those of Insicai’s soldiers. A smile that would not be denied lit up his face as he caught sight of Wally. Without a word he hopped over the elderly bug and clapped hands onto the wallaby’s shoulders and with joyous laughter declared, “A knight of his word after all, eh?”

Wally was confused for a second or two before he recalled the last time he and Hector spoke. In the tunnels under the Salt Barrens, they’d shared a vow to stay alive. With a surge of pride behind it, Wally smiled. “Not without some doing and bruises on our part.”

Hector laughed. “Of course! A knight of Animana wouldn’t have it any other way!”

Gan, seemingly appearing in an instant flash beside them, excitedly shouted “You’re a knight too?!”

Hector stood upright and eyed the young bird curiously before smiling. “Why yes, I am Sir Hector Cani the First. Grand Knight of Animana.”

Gan’s smile shrunk slightly, he looked between Wally and Hector a few times before finally saying, “But you don’t look anything like Sir Wally.”

The older knight looked to his compatriot with a sort of humored confusion that is often associated with a bad joke told by a beloved uncle.

Wally played it off as casually as he could, “It’s a long story.”

A throat was cleared to call everyone’s attention back to the small Insicai. “On the subject of long stories, I’ve been holding on to one for a while now, but it looks to me like we’re still short one. Where’s that Sauroian girl?”

Hector and Wally both noticed Gan flinching slightly at the word ‘Sauroian’, with Wally sensing a weak yet rising sense of concern from him.

“I’m here!” Hyla rushed in from the same passage Hector and Poda had taken, her attire also bearing sturdy metallic additions of Insicai design; primarily curved plate armor, hanging off her waist. “Sorry everyone, it took me a bit longer to check on the thing Argus installed.”

“‘Thing’ being the technical term,” Argus muttered to himself.

Gan stood a little closer to Wally; no mystically enhanced sense was needed to see Hyla’s presence made him uncomfortable. Just as he was going to say something to the young kestrel, Hyla’s voice quietly slipped betwixt his thinking.

‘Don’t.’

He looked to her and saw a sad, resigned sort of smile, the same he always saw on the face of any Sauroian in The Outers back home. That well-mannered, unwilling to cause trouble or grief look that served as both mask and shield. It only made Wally want to say something even more. But, absolutely willing to respect her wishes, he swallowed it back for the moment.

“Captain,” Poda began. “The red key in the center of the wheel will lock us into a hover and activate the Fog Rock emitters, this will take a while and I’d like your full attention.”

“Ain’t like you haven’t seen me do both, y’know!”

“Oh I know, but since it also makes Miss Areo’s silence spell much easier to maintain I thought it was for the best.”

With a click, several whirrs, and a loud hiss, the windows of the bridge were coated in thick white clouds. Slowly, Hyla made her way around the bridge, using a piece of chalk at the end of a wand to draw several symbols around them all. With a simple tap the air around them took on a prismatic shimmer before returning to normal.

“Now,” Poda stretched his arms, producing some rather painful sounding cracks and pops. “Last chance, anyone who doesn’t want to learn some of the oldest and most dangerous secrets of the world better leave the room.”

It was obvious to everyone but Gan that Poda was staring directly at him the entire time he said that. The kestrel took very slow notice of that fact and puffed out his feathers in response. “If I’m gonna help, I better hear this part too! Especially if it means keeping my flock safe!”

“Good answer, guess you can stay then. Now, this is a long story so I’ll try to tell it all in one go and leave questions for later.” The old round bug took a deep breath. “As you probably already know, this world was created by eight gods. What you don’t know is that doing so required them to use some aspect of themselves to keep Mondia whole. These lynchpins, scattered around the planet, made everything work. But they were as the gods themselves, lacking physical form. That’s where I come in, or rather, everyone.”

“Form follows function you see. An empty world would never stabilize, so the gods reached down and filled the world with people. They would stride Mondia, giving it purpose and structure. They’d name the mountains, the seas, the lands in between. They’d look upon the underpinnings of the world and give them the solidity that comes with understanding. For example, a rock is a rock, because everyone knows a rock is a rock. You ask anyone what a rock is, and they’ll know immediately what you’re talking about. That knowledge, in turn, is what maintains that rock’s very existence.”

“But soon there was a problem. Mondia was static; it simply was as it had been made. It was filled with beings that simply coexisted, all thinking the same thing, and acting the same way, with no urge to create, explore, or discover. The gods felt that a world that never changed was a truly empty endeavor and so, one of them reached down and seeded the people of Mondia with the smallest sparks of her being. These tiny lights inside us all that we came to call our souls are her gift. With them we grew, we changed, we loved, and we fought.”

“The world became as it is now, a dynamic place filled with all manner of unique life in all shapes and sizes. In time your ancestors forgot the names of their creators, and instead recalled these great and powerful artifacts they knew were important, but could never recall why. The majority of the gods were satisfied, save the one who’d given us true life. She watched us all from afar and wished desperately to be a part of the world she had a hand in making. And so, the other gods pooled their powers to give her a physical form and send her down to Mondia where she could experience the world as we do, but never interfere directly.”

Almost every eye in the room turned toward the Stellar Flare.

“In retrospect, maybe I should’ve turned her into a walking stick.” He tapped his own against the floor for emphasis. “She only asked if I could give her a lighter form that could be carried by any hand so she could travel with us as we lived. But, when I saw the beautiful ore that was her body at the time, I couldn’t resist. I made sure her heart would always shine like the star I thought she was. Then it turned out that working with the parts of a physically manifested god makes you pretty much immortal. Shame I was already and old bug by the time it kicked in,” he chuckled at his own joke.

The room was locked in stunned silence, and slowly every eye turned to the Stellar Flare and Wally.

“So…” Wally barely spoke above a whisper. “The voice I’ve been hearing…”

Poda smiled, “No, you’re not crazy. Also by the look of things…” His walking stick gently nudged Wally’s head to the side. “I can see why she’s been so quiet.”

Rozzi laughed softly, a nervous sort of noise at first that seemed to cut the tension in the room ever so slightly. Her laughter grew louder and louder until eventually she collapsed against Wally’s side burying her face into his shoulder.

Confused yet unable to keep from smiling at her apparent good mood, Wally helped her recover from the sudden laughing fit, rubbing her back as she finally began to breathe again. “Mind letting the rest of us in on that, or do you want to keep it all to yourself.”

“Sorry…” She gasped and giggled. “It was just, after that big important story, the first thing that came to mind was ‘and here I thought I was the only girl on his back’ and that joke was just so stupid I lost it.”

They looked at each other for a few seconds then finally collapsed into one another laughing their heads off.

Eventually everyone joined in, the earlier tension and importance lost in a sea of stress relieving guffaws and chortles that were absolutely essential.

They slowly tapered off as almost everyone in the room came to the same conclusions.

“So,” Hyla was the first to speak up. “Kota’s trying to unmake the world by destroying these Aspects of the gods?”

“No,” Poda said. “Remake it. I’m guessing all of you have met at least one Halcyon Knight by now?”

There were sounds of agreement and nods all around.

“As near as I could figure, the place they’re coming from was once Marsu. I’d always wondered what Kota was doing with it… Seems she was experimenting with rebuilding a small part of the world. Hammond stopped her before she could do the same to the rest of it.”

Hector leaned against a wall and crossed his arms, “It didn’t take.”

Wally looked pensive, double checking his memories of the events between himself and the Smith. “When I was destroying the Aegis’ Furnace, I talked to the Indomitable Smith. He said he was grateful to Hammond for a ‘second chance.’ As if to say, Hammond decided not to kill Kota. Of course, I wouldn’t believe him outright… But there’s a lot we still don’t know. Whatever Hammond did on the final day of the war drained the Flare and rid the world of Kota for twenty years.”

“There’s only one being in all creation who could answer that question, my boy.” Poda reached out and tapped his walking stick against the Flare. “And only one place we can go to get her what she needs.”

“Krust Mountain.” Several of them replied.

“… Is that what you’re calling it nowadays? Well, I suppose that’s catchier than ‘the Point of Origin’. But when you’re the first to name things you don’t necessarily have to be creative.”

Wally’s train of thought switched track immediately when it came to the subject of names. “Skystone Tower… We’d just been calling it the Storm Bell’s tower but the Smith very specifically called it that.”

Poda tilted his head toward the wallaby. “Well that’s what I called it, because that’s what it’s made from.”

Everyone turned back to Poda.

“Yes, I built it after I finished Stormstone Keep. Never thought people would want to live around that one. But there you are, Stormyard. Which is where, I might add, we’re all going.”

Wally’s ears sprang straight up. “That’s right! The knights were looking for something called the Lock Bolt!”

Poda nodded. “An Aspect of the Storm God., we can’t let them get their hands on it.”

“Hang on,” Rozzi said. “If that’s a piece of one particular god of storms, what the heck was that bell?”

“Another piece,” Poda laughed once. “It’s not a one to one ratio dear; the Aspects of the gods that keep our world stitched together are varied. I’m sure you’ve noticed that by now.”

“That’s right!” Wistea called out. “The power of the Silent Marsh was seen as equal to the Wellspring of Planae!”

“Well if that’s the case,” Rozzi continued. “What’s to keep them from just poppin’ off toward somethin’ other than the Lock Bolt.

“Quality, I’d assume.” Argus answered. “I know if I wanted to remodel a whole world, I’d want all the power I could squeeze from the old one to do it.”

Poda pulled on one of his antenna pensively. “From what you’ve told me, they still require the energies of the Storm, Air, Earth and Fire gods. You already stopped them from draining the brightstone trove so they’ll probably be seeking an alternative to that now.”

“What about Light and Dark?” Blackeye asked. “Ain’t they still out there?”

“No,” Hyla said. “Those were already in Sauro. They were called the Fang of Aod, and the Talon of Nez. The legend says they fought to the death and formed the valley of Sauro when they fell, and that from their fallen bodies sprang the whole of its people, which, if I’m honest, sounds even more ridiculous to me now than ever before.”

Poda shrugged. “Ask me, it certainly sounds a hell of a lot better than, ‘we survived a bunch of volcanic explosions that made it so we’ll never see the sun again.’ At any rate, the Aspects of Earth, and Air are still in play.  Luckily Earth is at Krust Mountain so that should absolutely be our next stop. Air should still be at the heart of the Plain of Frozen Echoes.”

Polly gasped, “Grandpa! Isn’t that the place you almost died in?”

Blackeye laughed. “Darlin’ I almost died a lot of places. But yes, that one’s particularly bad. Not sure flyin’ll make it any easier either.”

“The way I see it,” Hector said. “We should all focus on securing the Lock Bolt, after which we divide the team to protect the Aspect of Air while Wally heads to Krust Mountain in the… What did you call it Captain?”

“S’a Skiff, ain’t no difference that it flies.”

Everyone agreed to the plan and slowly filed out of the bridge, Hyla erasing her spell and Blackeye setting the ship on its course once more. Wally turned to Gan, who, for the last few minutes had been absolutely frozen on the spot in astonishment at everything he’d heard.

“How’re you holding up?”

Gan couldn’t find words to put to everything he’d just heard.

Wally, ever one to play the understanding elder sibling, spoke earnestly. “It’s only going to get more intense from here, you know. No shame in heading home.”

His shock fell away in and instant, replaced with stern seriousness and total resolution. Really though it looked like he was trying to frown his beak off.

“Alright, alright… I know better than to try and fight you on this. Just be careful, there’s no telling what we’ll run into from here on out.”

---

Just outside the city limits of Stormyard sat Balor Prison, a mighty stronghold of stone and iron where all the ne'er do wells and fiends of Orni’Hu are sent. Its newest occupant, covered head to toe in ragged clothing and dirty wrappings, sat quietly in their cell meditating. They’d been arrested for vagrancy and deliberately ignoring authorities. Taking offense at their implacable silence, the jailers had the stranger placed in solitary confinement. A lone guard was sent to look in on them every night to see if they’d speak.

It’d been almost a week of absolute silence when the guard arrived and opened the small slat in the door to observe the prisoner and pass them food. Once again the earlier offer was uneaten and left nearby to be collected. The guard rolled his eyes and sarcastically asked. “Don’t suppose you have anything to say for yourself this time?”

“Yes,” The prisoner replied quite plainly. “It is time for me to go.” The cell door then exploded off its hinges, knocking the guard off his feet. The ragged prisoner stepped out of their cell, and walked away.

<[Chapter 29]–[Index]–[Chapter 31]>