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#this happened at least three times a week when we were doing our rewatch on discord
transmascutena · 8 months
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something that always happens to me is i'll make a joke or exaggeration and people will take it very seriously and assume it's because i didn't understand whatever i'm talking about which is. i guess fair enough because i'm sure i do the same thing all the time
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favvn · 7 days
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youre literally so so right about the naked time. once my sister asked me which tos episode was my favorite and i literally said "well excluding the obvious ones (meaning amok time and the naked time, because i felt they were on another tier of obsession entirely)" like i genuinely felt that theyre existence was so obviosuly unfair to every other episode that i had to ignore them. anyway i answered city on the edge of forever which i think does have its weird parts and issues but is still so good and iconic. there are many other good ones id have to rewatch to be certain though. havent ever been a fan of the tribble episodes though
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A fellow connoisseur! You're so right, The Naked Time and Amok Time do exist in their own tier, separate from the other episodes lest they outshine everything else (season three fails for not having an episode with "time" in the title. We could have had the Time Trio, the Time Trifecta, the Time Triumvirate but no).
For me, Mirror, Mirror exists in that same tier, but a lot of that is owing to going too deep into my own headcanons of, "What if Mirror Kirk was regular Kirk but minus the compassion and ethics? Hmm..." But that couldn't have happened because then the episode would've had to split between the two universes and Mirror Kirk is Evil and Not Our Good Guy, so lock him away to focus on Our Kirk. The City On the Edge of Forever might as well exist in that same tier for me owing to it being adapted from a Harlan Ellison screenplay (the cut scene between Spock and Kirk will haunt me... Spock: You could come with me for a rest... [gently] All the time in the world... Kirk: [hopelessly] And full of tomorrows...) and what the story introduces both for Kirk and Spock together as a pair (weeks of sharing a bedroom, possibly only one bed owing to where all the computer pieces are placed 👀 don't tell me Spock didn't sleep in that time when Kirk is spending their meager funds on vegetables for him) and the specific anguish that Kirk has to deal with by the end. Dare I call it the perfect example of how he is torn between the duty demanded of the captaincy and his desire for love and what rest it could bring him as The Naked Time reveals? (If only he could bring himself to actually choose love over duty, at least, within the series anyways.)
Aw, I do love The Trouble With Tribbles though. It's a beautiful Kirk and His No Good, Very Bad Day episode and cheers me up on my own bad work days (infestation of alien rodents, diplomacy woes, the Klingons are there and his crew got into a bar brawl with them, his chief engineer only cares about the ship so not even a confinement to quarters is a punishment for the bar fight, etc.). That one, I, Mudd, and A Piece of the Action are the episodes I put on for a guaranteed laugh owing to their humor (I'll overlook the sexism in I, Mudd because their plan to fry the androids is brilliant, amazing, showstopping, etc. and of course I am a sucker for a good Kirk speech)
I really should keep better track of which episodes I've really enjoyed beyond those, but I'm also still in the process of my first-time watch, so there's more to come that I've heard about but haven't seen yet, such as Plato's Stepchildren and The Empath. (Spectre of the Gun was last night's episode and I definitely enjoyed it for what it did. What a fun twist on the plot of Arena)
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invitationtoher · 13 days
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You're in my Way, Cage. | Chapter 2: Kitana
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Chapter 1
Summery: Kitana Edenia, smart, beautiful, and stressed. With dreams of becoming a doctor due to her sister, Mileena, having a major case of chronic fatigue syndrome (CFS). Throughout her entire school life she's been focused on her goal of getting into the very same college that her mother and father went to and fell in love at, Mortal Kampus University (MKU), an ivy league school where the only people are intelligent as they are talented. Kitana vows to make her mother proud with no distractions, at least that was the plan until she met an obnoxious dirty blonde in her English Class.
Jonathan Carlton? No, he's Johnny Cage! Hollywood's next big star! He may not act as smart as he actually is, but he shines when it comes to entertainment, if it's on the screen or behind the scenes Johnny can do it all, thanks to the Carlton family being in the film industry for generations. Thanks to his parents money and his acting and martial arts talents (as well as writing), he got a scholarship to MKU's theater department! He knows MKU will be a good time, it's his chance to make his own name. When he sees a pretty girl in his English class whose walls seem unbreakable, he vows to break down those walls and see the real her by showing her a film.
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                Keeping your head down in college is much easier than keeping it down in high school, it seemed like most of my classmates had the same idea. Yet, it was only the first day, anything could happen, just like how those planners to help students stay on top of their work will disappear next week.
            I was grateful that our professors seemed to be rather chill today, yet again, it was only the first day. We learned a little bit about the history of computers, mainly that ENIAC was the first electronic computer, and that the Colossus was the first programmable computer, I’m no tech nerd but so far it makes sense to me. Chemistry was about the first chemists, since it was a lecture instead of the LAB, Microbiology about LAB safety by watching a cheesy 80’s video (I have a gut feeling I’d have to rewatch it in my chem LAB tomorrow), the day was long but still not over.
            I was lucky that the academic resources building was right next to the technology building, my whole schedule today was pretty much walking a huge square, and I’d most likely do the same thing tomorrow as well. I was the first person to arrive in the lecture room, my professor greeted me and made a playful quip about how early I was that I must be excited to learn English. I gave him a pitiful laugh to entertain him, his friendly expression turning into a prideful one that I laughed at his lame joke.
            I sat down in the second row before the last on one of the edge seats, I always preferred to sit closer to the back during my dual enrollment classes I took, it kept me out of the sight of people and usually by the end of the second week the people that sit in the back eventually move to were ever their friends were sitting. No one ever sat next to anyone either, which means I have enough space to scatter my planner, my laptop, and notes that I took on my iPad. It also meant that I was free from unwanted socialization.
            I pulled out my phone from my bag to check in on Mileena when I noticed the time, 12:15. I felt heat rising to my cheeks in embarrassment after realizing that I was 30 minutes early to my class, I bit my bottom lip, tasting that same strawberry lip gloss I just reapplied after Micro-bio ended.
How’s your day been? ┃
            I sat there and waited for the three dots in the bubble to appear, it didn’t take long for Mileena to text back, it never does. She was a fast texter, always replying as fast as she could with her thumbs going fast enough to leave a trail of fire behind them.
┃Good, boring, how’s urs been?
  Just great. ┃
I arrived at my English class half an hour early. ┃
And my teacher thinks he’s a comedian. ┃
┃Oh u poor thing 😢
┃I’ll make you some cookies for ur troubles
            I rolled my eyes at her words; I could practically hear the sarcasm spewing through the screen.
            Mileena’s day seemed… uneventful. We talk about our classes and what we’ve done so far to kill time, she already decided that her world history class would be her “fucking around” class since she so happens to be an expert on it all (doubtful, since they’re starting with a government unit.), as she so gracefully puts it.
            She’s always been good at history, she’s definitely one the biggest history buff I know; she says that the class is like reading a whole book on the world and the mysteries of what happened before us, that the history textbooks we were forced to carry around were just a book filled with short stories that happened so we could learn from our mistakes and triumphs.
┃Have u talked to anyone?
┃U know dad’s gonna ask when he calls tonight
┃He wants u to get out there and meet people this year
┃And so do I…
┃I’m tired of them asking when I’m gonna meet a guy 😭
┃And have brats 🤢
┃As if I go outside at all even on a good day
            I pressed my lips in a thin line, the once fun mood turned into a serious one as those three dots bounced on my screen message after message with her horrendous texting grammar.
┃Look
┃I’m gonna bffr Sis
┃Ur pretty and smart
┃Just like me 🤭
┃U listen too much to mom
┃U work too hard
┃Have fun this year
┃Meet a guy (or girl if ur into that😉)
┃It’s time for some romance in ur boring dull life
            I looked up as I heard the door open and a stampede of shoes walk into the classroom to try and get a seat away from people, the professor smiling and welcoming them all to the class and to sit anywhere they pleased, but the class just studied the seats, trying to figure out where to sit and who to sit by. The grilled chicken wrap churned in my stomach at the feeling of all the eyes of my peers on me.
            I looked back down at my phone, reading the text choppy strings of text again. She was right, I know she was right. But I’m not going to just push all my hard work aside just for someone who I’m not even sure I’ll end up with. My thumbs dance across the screen in a rush to respond- something to show her that I’ll take it into consideration but it’s not definite- as the class is about to start.
I’ll try.┃
            As I put my phone away, I heard a chair scrap against the floor of the classroom, a chair that sounded way too close to me for my comfort. I glance beside me to see a bulky man leaning back against the chair, he had Ray-Ban sunglasses that prevented me from seeing his eye color, his head was tilted back and supported by his large hands that were interlaced behind his head and into his dirty blonde locks that were styled, his elbows pointed up and his large muscles on his biceps slightly covering his face. His blue button up shirt sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, the fabric of the shirt that was held closed by the buttons stretching across his broad chest. His legs spread out in a man spread, his knee barely grazes my thigh.
            My face turned pale at the slight contact, I quickly pulled my leg away and turned my head. I hear a small chuckle from beside me, from him. I bit my bottom lip and hesitantly turned my head to face him again, his hand pulled down his sunglasses to the bridge of his nose, his sparkling brown eyes staring at me. His lips formed a smirk as he gave me a flirty wink just like the kind a jock would give a cheerleader in a Hallmark movie my mother plays for the cats when she leaves the house.
            I scoffed and rolled my eyes before looking in front of me, great, looks like I got stuck next to a guy that can only think with his dick. I’ve encountered a few people like that today, but I was watching from a distance. Looks like it’s my turn to have an interaction with one of the most insufferable types of people that could be on a college campus.
            I know it’s not exactly nice to assume that about my seat neighbor, but what happened to “Hi, how are you?”, “My name is blank, what’s yours?“, or any sort of chivalry. I could hear him grumble quietly, disappointed that I didn’t give him the reaction he wanted.
            As I looked around the room, I noticed that everyone was sitting side-by-side, but there was enough room for another chair in the middle between each group of two.
            “I like the buddy group system.” He says, answering all our silent questions, “I was always a shy kid in school, never wanting to get up and ask for anyone to be my partner for a project. Think of it as useful for when you guys do your peer reviews and projects. If you have an issue with your buddy after the first essay, then you can talk to me about switching, fair?”
            The class all mindlessly nodded. Great, now I’m stuck with him until our first essay. I sigh and rest my face in the palm of my hand, my neighbor letting out a small hum in amusement. ‘The buddy peer review system’ was always a pain in my ass in high school. I usually just asked if I could have my sister at home review it, most of my teachers said sure, but others said no. Which is understandable, they wanted me to get out of my comfort zone
            “Now, we’re going to do an activity to get to know your partner, that way you guys get to know each other. Maybe you’ll find things you guys have in common, maybe you’ll end up as friends. Don’t be shy.”
            He explained, as he placed a paper in front of each student. My shoulders slump, I glanced slightly at my “peer review buddy” to see him smiling playfully, his sunglasses off and his eyes glancing at me as well. As soon as our eyes met, I looked away quickly, he let out another small chuckle.
            “Keep staring, princess, looks like you’re not going to get rid of me that easily.”
            I try not to roll my eyes and look up at the clock, silently praying that whatever is out there will have mercy on me and speed up the clock, I don’t think I can last the semester without strangling this guy.
© invitationtoher 2024
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signalwatch · 11 months
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Godzilla (2014)
Watched:  11/04/2023
Format:  BluRay
Viewing:  Second, I think
Director:  Gareth Edwards
In a couple of weeks, Apple+ is dropping their decade-spanning, genre-mixing show about the Monarch organization, which is the group that.... something something.... in a world of giant beasties, based on Godzilla (2014) and the series of attached movies.  I've heard where in the movie timeline the show takes place - just after this movie, and it had been a while, so I finally rewatched the first of the Monsterverse films to remind myself what the hell happens in the flick.
I remember going into Godzilla (2014) with some trepidation.  The last American-made Godzilla movie I'd seen was the 1998 trainwreck that just piled on all the worst habits of 1990's-era blockbuster entertainment, and then curb-stomped you with them.*
The trailers for the 2014 edition certainly looked cool, but the fact is that at the time of the film's release, Hollywood was doing this thing where they would come up with cool stuff for trailers and then maybe make a movie that tied those scenes and lines together.  
It was promising a movie for all-ages, including adults - casting thinking-person's stars like Bryan Cranston, Juliet Binoche, Ken Watanabe, David Strathairn and Sally Hawkins (a curious trend that has continued through Godzilla v. Kong with Rebecca Hall as our lead).  So it was literally *buying* gravitas with the casting choices.  Which was maybe needed after the 1998 debacle.  
Leaving the movie, I remember a vague sense of disappointment, but wasn't blogging at the time, so there's no record of what I was thinking.  In the 9 years since I've re-watched the movie, I'd kind of forgotten what the deal was.  Certainly I remembered them bumping off Binoche in the film's first five minutes, and that Cranston similarly exits the film in the first act, when I thought he was going to be our lead.  
Instead, we are handed Aaron Taylor-Johnson in a thankless, vague and personality-free role of "Ford Brody" - a US soldier of some sort (I'm pretty sure I heard him say "navy" at some point, but that seemed weird) who specializes in defusing bombs.  He's supposedly partnered with Elizabeth Olsen as his wife, Elle, but the two get maybe three minutes together in the whole film - a film that depends entirely on you caring about Ford's return to his family (why he leaves actually makes zero sense, but whatever).  At no point will the audience care about this other than "oh, I guess that's why he's there/ doing that".  
The problem with all that all-star casting is that in 2014, neither Olsen nor Taylor-Johnson were the people many of us showed up to see.  So when those stars you came to see start getting bumped off, or get relegated to exposition-spouting background characters (sorry, Sally Hawkins), you aren't really sure why you're supposed to be following the blank-space-of a character in a motorcycle jacket that is Taylor-Johnson's character.  You'll want to spend time with literally everyone else on screen.
However, the entire movie is set up - much to my surprise the first time - to be Ford's story.  We're intended to find out *why* he's invested in the events, and - because this is an American movie - has a deeply personal stake in what is happening.  Which means the first twenty minutes could possibly be lopped off the film and conveyed via two or three lines of dialog.  But, instead, we're shown everything, which sets up the audience to care about and to wish to follow entirely the wrong characters.  
Once we're in 2014, fortunately, the movie fates place Ford just right in the world, in a series of increasingly unlikely events, to be exactly where he needs to be at any given time to be a part of the movie's globetrotting events.  Also, not because he did any work, but happened to overhear something, he's the person with the required knowledge at least once.  And we're told he apparently set up a nuclear weapon, but that happened off-screen?
This is as good a segue as any to talk about how you can cast the best actors, get cool-as-hell FX departments, etc...  but this is, in fact, a very, very badly written movie. 
The scenes that do work are very much written to be teaser trailers and worked backward into the movie.  The halo jumping sequence is absolute, illogical nonsense, but looks cool as hell, and may have been what was pitched to execs.  Godzilla coming onto the beach in Honolulu, same.  But they aren't cohesive as a story, and there's no real characters to get invested in to make you care if the monsters destroy the world or not.
Retro-engineering the movie, given what we know now about Legendary's plans, this is really just all set-up for getting an audience invested in the world that we now refer to as The Monsterverse.  The movie cares more about sequels than itself - a problem with a lot of media in a post-Lost world, and misunderstanding how Marvel was working.  It wants us to understand that there's an expert agency that looks into Godzilla-type happenings, and - working with the military?  sometimes? - takes care of the issues, but is really mostly standing around being very concerned, while also hiding the fact that Godzillas exist.  Which seems like a very tall order, indeed.
I'll be honest, I had no memory of Monarch by the the time I saw the sequel, so excellent job, my dudes.  
From a story perspective, it's the kind of movie where we find out that the people who have spent 15 years, every day, studying the monster who has taken over a nuclear power plant have somehow learned nothing, pondered nothing, done no basic science, and so it is that Ford Brody has all the info they could ever need as person who showed up on the scene 4 hours ago (and you will also wonder why they didn't just hire Cranston).  It's the kind of movie that says "we evacuated a whole small city by pretending there was a nuclear disaster, but we didn't kill the monster in the middle of the evacuated area because we thought that would actually radiate the area everyone already was not living in."  Which... amazing logic.
The most baffling decision by the movie is that it's absolutely, deeply against actually caring about why you bought your ticket (to see Godzilla).  There are multiple battles between Godzilla and the stupid stink-bug looking MUTOs, and fuck you if you would have liked to have seen those, because this movie is convinced that's like putting the camera on the clouds for several minutes in a movie about people surviving a storm.  
But it is not.  Our monsters are the main event.  I don't care if it's the Rockettes performing while firing muskets into the air while the ghost of George Washington tap dances around - my eyes is going to be drawn to the behemoths destroying city blocks by turning around.  
What happened in Hawaii?  We had minutes of build up featuring huge set-pieces and POV characters.  We get our first glimpses of G himself and his incredibly fat ankles.  But when the fight kicks in, it's shown as maybe three shots on a 13" TV in other scenes in Elizabeth Olsen's apartment.  
You want to see the rampage through Vegas?  Eat my butt.  We're showing the aftermath.
You want to see the monsters actually engaging in San Francisco?  You're just a fool for thinking that will happen.  We will show the humans doing their shit, and cut away just as the monsters engage time and time again.  And when we DO finally show it, it will be so dark, you'll be wondering if something went wrong with how you're viewing the movie.
Like, I don't understand how one decides that they're making a movie about gigantic monsters fighting and thinks what we want to see is soldiers planning a parachute jump, not "in addition to" but "instead of" monster fights.  
Consequently, the movie is weirdly boring.  We're just going from place to place, being denied better characters and dialog while gesturing at who they cast.
I've seen, I believe, all but two Godzilla films (three if you count the one that hasn't been released yet), and I can tell you, no matter how goofy or dumb most of these movies are, they know why you paid your dollars for a seat.  So they may be a confusing mess of sub-plots, but they WILL show you Godzilla and an enemy or three mixing it up for long stretches.  And they do not think you only need to see glimpses of the monster fights in the background as someone ties their shoes in the foreground.
I may think Skull Island is an affront to the legacy of King Kong, but no one is going to call that movie boring or suggest it under delivers on crazy monster stuff.  So someone figured this out.
What I don't get is why they went with *this* design for Godzilla.  Why the stumpy avocado look?  Look, nothing was going to look worse than the 1998 trainwreck, so by that measure, it's an improvement.  My assumption is that Toho doesn't want for US-made Godzilla to look like their Godzilla, but I have no evidence that's true.  What I generally believe is that there is science that talks about how animals would be shaped if they scaled up, and the larger an animal gets, the more it has to be shaped wider rather than taller - ie: you get a pyramid at some point.  And this is that.  But, my guys, this is about an amphibious monster king who shoots atomic rays from his tummy out his mouth, so maybe we go for "cool" instead of "will please my Bio 301 TA".  
I guess kids like it, because those toys do move, but I gotta say, I think the Final Wars Godzilla looked rad as hell and would have been nice to see as a CGI adaptation.  It's not really til they made adjustments to Avocadozilla in Gozilla v Kong that I was onboard with this design.
But, maybe the greatest bit to make you wonder what the hell was going on at Legendary when making this movie occurs in the he final moments. 
After Godzilla has managed to help level Honolulu and most of San Francisco, he needs a nap, and takes one in the middle of the city, waiting a couple of days before he wakes up again, fresh as a daisy.  As he's leaving, the TV screens have "Godzilla, King of the Monsters:  Our Savior?" on the chyron.
That's like.... one day you're at home and two mountain lions and a bear enter your home, destroying pretty much everything you own and killing your family dog.  The bear manages to finish off the mountain lions and then naps for a bit on your couch.  I really don't think you're looking at that bear and thinking "wow, he really did it.  He really helped me out."
I haven't even got into how the 25-story-tall monsters keep sneaking around silently and keep surprising our heroes.  Nor why the answer of the military to 25 story monsters is "send in foot soldiers with machine guns" instead of "pound these things with our gigantic cannons mounted on battleships that can hit a target miles away".  
The movie finally, finally remembers in the last ten minutes that you can do more with a character in a movie than have them either deliver information or look bewildered when we see Ford decide "if Godzilla can go above and beyond, so, too, can I!" using, like, legit film language.  The moment is the only one to convey that anyone would see Godzilla as anything other than a pants-dumping terror instigator, so it does help the point of "our hero?" but it's also entirely singular to the experience of Ford and like 2 other people.
When given an opportunity for real, human moments - like Ford being reunited with his child - we just don't show it.  It happens off screen, and that may be the most telling moment for how this movie sees character, story, emotional beats, etc...  We don't care.  All we care about is making sure the audience has seen Godzilla, knows he's there to fight monsters, monsters don't give a shit about humans, and that Monarch is there to look concerned and wear their IDs on lanyards when the monsters show up.
It's just such a weird movie.  
One could easily say "you dismiss all of the nonsense in the Japanese films" - but, two things.  (1) It's largely arguable that the movies after 1954 are for pre-teens, and not pulling in big-name stars to sell us on the idea that this is a movie is something not dumb.  And (2) Their storylines may be nonsense, but the plots, no matter how insane, have an internal logic that holds.  This movie can't even do that.  Nothing really makes any sense, it all just keeps unfolding and hoping you don't notice "hey, this is dumb as hell".  Unfortunately, that requires actually seeing the monsters, to which this movie stands in violent opposition.
What do I like?  
Well, it's nice to see the talent assembled in front of the camera, I guess.  I wish they'd been given literally anything to do but exposit.  The effects are ok, and the final monster fight - what you can see of it - is nicely framed in bits like a classic Godzilla film, pulling back to let you see how tiny the city is against the creatures.  I don't mind the insertion of Monarch into the movie as a concept - I wish they'd explained in the slightest what they were, why and what they hoped to do.  It's a nice hardware porn movie, with jets, helicopters, battleships, etc...  It's nice to see a pre-super-famous Elizabeth Olsen.  She's as good as one could hope for given her five lines in the movie.  
But for the most part, the movie was pretty much how I remembered.  
Kids seemed to like it, and everyone has done well selling the toys (which may also be why the Godzilla in this movie looks how it does, so Bandai doesn't get a cut).  But kids don't give a shit who Juliet Binoche and Ken Watanabe are, so.  For the teen to 20-somethings, it did fine, but I was surprised it launched a franchise.  There's a lot about movies and budgets and who gets paid that I don't understand.  But I don't know anyone who *loves* this movie.  It just kind of exists.  
To their credit, these movies do seem to be getting better with each movie, but what a weird way to workshop concepts already sorted out by our friends in Japan.
*I saw the movie twice in theaters at the time - once to see it, and a second time to take my brother so he could see the awfulness with his own eyes
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shadowsong26x · 2 years
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A week or so ago, I posted a summary of a BSG fanmix I made a decade+ ago. I made two other mixes around the same time, and yeah let’s go ahead and give them the same treatment XD
This one is Heart of the Machine, and it is a (mostly) complete set of all canonical ships* involving at least one Cylon.
Full disclosure: this one, I’d found at least the tracklist awhile ago, so there weren’t any Surprises on here the way there were for Days Upon Our Knees. And...like...there are a few tracks on here that I could have done better, for various reasons, but there aren’t any that Confused me the way there were on the other mix? I more or less can figure out what I was thinking with each choice. And there are quite a few that are just. Perfect. (I particularly like tracks two, ten, twelve, and sixteen)
*So, I don’t have any of the notes involved in Constructing this mix--it was done for a fandom charity auction back in the day, i think help_japan after the earthquake?--but to the best of my recollection the rules were:
1. Canonical pairs only; meaning the couple had to have an Explicit romantic or sexual encounter On Screen.      1a. There is a pair that I apparently forgot--I haven’t gotten there in my rewatch, but I am told that this actually happened and wasn’t just made up for a TFLN blog so whoops.      1b. Presumably there was a Threshold for what counts as a ‘romantic or sexual encounter’; because there are a few I can think of that are borderline ‘was this just general flirting or could I have included it’ (and there’s another that...even if it met the threshold requirement (which I’m not sure it does) it’s. Like. I’ve built Corinne/Armistice Station Six up in my head recently but she’s not really. Uh. We don’t actually know anything about her so...yeah. but I like her and her name is Corinne in my head which is the main reason I brought it up lol)      1c. There are two others that technically count that I don’t remember being discussed; I’m not sure why Caprica/Head!Baltar was excluded (other than maybe redundancy?); the other is a Spoiler for late S4 and was doing something Very Cruel and Specific and I’m not sure I could have found a song for it anyway.      1d. There were three that were specifically excluded for squick reasons; namely Gina/Cain; Cavil/Boomer; and Cavil/Ellen.
2. The pair has to involve At Least One Cylon.      2a. Fairly self-explanatory, lol.      2b. Eleven of the twelve Cylon models are included here nobody loves Doral      2c. If we count by model, the Sixes (unsurprisingly) have the most tracks, with six (heh) total.      2d. If we count by individuals, the highest number (five tracks) is not actually a Cylon. Three guesses. The first two don’t count.
With those rules in mind, I ended up with the seventeen pairs listed below. The mix is structured in model order--the Significant Seven in number order, then the Final Five. I don’t 100% know why I ordered them the way I did, other than I think I started where I did for Alphabetical reasons but then didn’t stick with it for whatever reason. With one exception, for Cylon/Cylon pairings, I went with the lower model number. That exception made for an Excellent final track, though, so there it is. Within a model number, I went more or less chronologically in terms of when in canon the relationship starts.
...I think that covers it, lol. Lots of notes on this one XD Tracklist (complete with youtube links, as before) is behind the cut! (I should dig up the covers for these, I know I have them saved somewhere...)
1/one/tough!six - so immortal (international victim)      so this is probably the weakest on the list, mostly because...they’re a hard pair to find a song for, lol. i do think it fits, and i don’t think i could do better, but it is what it is. (also i named her vera for serenissima and the name has stuck so whenever i see her i’m like “VERA! :D :D :D” anyway i love her)
2/leoben/kara - on the street where you live (my fair lady)      tell me i’m wrong.
3/d’anna/baltar - dangerous game (jekyll and hyde)      i go back and forth on whether this one works better when it’s gender-flipped or not, but the vibe works. i do think i could do better than this for these two, but i don’t have anything specific in mind, if that makes sense?
4/d’anna/caprica - strange and beautiful (drew sarich)      yeaaaaah i cheated again on the ‘no repeating artists’ rule, like i did with the other mix. i think i did for all three mixes i made...anyway, that aside. this is another pair that’s hard to find something for, because we don’t get much that’s about them. it’s all about either the triad as a whole or the baltar/d’anna arm. that being said, i do like this song for d’anna/for what little we do get of them. (do i remember why i split the triad and picked two songs? nope! but i am glad i did; i might even--if i were doing this now--do three songs; one for each arm (other than the one accounted for Elsewhere) and then one for the triad as a whole)
5/simon/gianna - the next ten minutes (the last five years)      i love this song, and i love the...simon knows what’s coming And Yet. that whole sense of ‘for as long as this lasts’ has a Whole Different Meaning in this context and i think it’s beautiful. basically, i love them, and i think this song really fits for them.
6/caprica/baltar - measure of a man (clay aiken)      so i think this is actually one of the weaker examples on this mix. not because it doesn’t work--it does; it fits where they land at the end of the series--but because there are so many better songs for them. i don’t know why i settled on this one specifically, but i think i’d pick something else if i were doing this now.
7/gina/baltar - lithium (evanescence)      it’s hard for me to listen to this song without thinking of these two and their Extremely Fucked Up This Could Never Be A Happy Or Healthy Relationship dynamic now. not because it’s a Perfect Match necessarily, but...just...the Vibe.
8/lida/baltar - crash and burn (savage garden)      i don’t have much in the way of commentary on this one but i like it. it’s a pretty song, and it suits what’s going on in-story here.
9/boomer/chief - without you (rent)      not much to say about this one, either. but it’s a good fit for how they are in the back half of season 1, after he breaks things off.
10/athena/helo - as long as you love me (backstreet boys)      shut up it’s perfect okay
11/sweet!eight/gaeta - hallelujah (jeff buckley)      i think this works really well for the two of them (and for my best beloved most ironically named man in the universe felix gaeta in general, i think). i don’t know that there’s anything better i could pick, but i almost wish i had found something different? this song is such a heavy hitter, and i wish i’d saved it for...idk, maybe the season 4 mix i never got around to making, or a gaeta mix? ah well.
12/anders/kara - smoothie king (bowling for soup)      HOLY MOOD WHIPLASH BATMAN XD
13/anders/tory - when i’m down (chris cornell)      this is another pair that’s hard to pin down. but they’re definitely sleeping together during crossroads when sam is at his lowest and they’re being pushed towards activation and...i don’t know, it felt right? still does.
14/tory/baltar - spy (carly simon)      don’t really have all that much to say about this one either, lol. but it Works.
15/chief/cally - nothing without you (vienna teng)      this song is less Frantic and Scared and Angry than the moment it lines up with in canon, it’s more...sad. such a hard bit to watch, though, and i can’t say it doesn’t fit. ...also i know enough of the behind-the-scenes about why cally left the show that. well.
16/saul/ellen - grace is gone (dave matthews band)      SUFFER WITH ME. also, fun fact--the recording i have goes ‘take my heart/take my eyes’ (which. i’m pretty sure is taken Way more literally in this context than in the original lol). but EVERY SINGLE VERSION, whether lyrics or an actual recording, that i’ve been able to find online says ‘take my eyes/take my heart’??? and since i got my version on a burned cd and i forget who gave it to me i will Never Know the original source or why it’s different, lol. it’s definitely not because it’s a cover, i know that much for sure. his voice is Distinctive. (i do think heart-eyes flows better than eyes-heart but that’s a separate conversation)
17/saul/caprica - and so it goes (billy joel)      look, we all know this is a find-and-replace relationship. explicitly so on his end, implicit on hers (as upset as she is with the corporeal version at this point in the timeline, head!baltar is still hanging around sooooo). also it’s...just a nice song to end the mix on, i think.
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dubersbutt · 3 years
Text
Take a Bow (4) - Connor McDavid and Leon Draisaitl
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3,
Warnings: Babies, anxiety/feelings of heightened anxiety, smut
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It’s not that Connor hates kids. They just make him uncomfortable.
Like when his aunt had a baby when he was 13 his mom asked if Connor wanted to hold him. Connor was fine when his mom gently placed the baby in his arms. Up until his mom told her to be super careful with his head or else he could snap his neck and kill him. Or if Connor accidently pressed his soft spot it could severely detriment his brain development. It was too much responsibility.
At least that’s what he used to think.
He fell in love with Emilia the minute you walked through the front door with her in the baby carrier. The dogs were excited by the tiny squirming arms inside the carrier, he had to hold Lenny back so he didn’t crush her.
“This is going to sound super cliche,” Connor says as he coos into the carrier where Emilia is trying to open her tiny eyes, “but she is the cutest baby I’ve ever seen.”
“She’s a lot cuter now that her head is a normal shape,” you joke, munching on a cookie Connor had set out for you.
“Can you stop making fun of our daughter’s cone head?” Leon rolls his eyes.
“You didn’t see it, it was terrifying.”
(Connor googles a picture of it later. Babies are fucking weird.)
He helps you up the stairs to the waiting cup of tea on the mug warmer in your bedroom. He lets you get settled, handing you the TV remote and giving you a kiss on the forehead before going back downstairs to meet his daughter (step-daughter? Connor didn’t really know).
“Can I hold her?” Connor asks when he finds Leon and Emilia in the living room.
“What happened to the three month rule?” He raises an amused eyebrow.
Connor had created it after the incident. He didn’t hold a baby that was younger than 3 months.
“I’m feeling brave.”
Leon scooches over so Connor has room to sit comfortably. Leon gently places Emilia in his arms, and gives Connor a pillow to prop his arm on. Emilia’s blinks at him before squirming and stretching her little arms over her head. Connor feels all warm and fuzzy in his chest.
“Hello, Emilia,” he says, with a smile on his face, “I’m your other dad.”
~~~
Connor’s not inherently a jealous person.
Or at least he thought he was. But ever since Emilia came home he’s been feeling it. He loves Emilia, don’t get him wrong. Well, actually, he should backpedal for a second.
Connor is still annoyed at Leon.
He knows he should probably bring this up (because look what happened last time) but he hasn’t because Leon was trying to make things right with you. He obviously was trying with Connor as well, but he couldn’t help but feel like he was an afterthought. Some days were better than others, but everytime Connor thought about how he woke up and couldn’t find Leon in the penthouse he felt like puking.
Emilia eases the pain. He truly does love her like his own. The only time he uses the “she’s your kid” card is when it's 2 am and he’s too tired to get up. But he rarely even does that because Connor’s always been the heaviest sleeper out of the three of you. But other than that, he volunteers for bathtime, plays with her while you’re in the shower, he doesn’t even hate changing diapers that much.The puppies love her too, they’ve transitioned from napping on the dog beds in the living room to the spot on the couch closest to the bassinet to keep an eye on them. He regularly has to stop Lenny from trying to jump in and crush Emilia.
Back to Leon (Connor tends to get side tracked when talking about Emilia). Connor’s still annoyed and he’s been working up to talking about it. But it never seems like a good time. First you were pregnant, and Connor didn’t want to upset either of you. Then it was playoffs and Connor didn’t have any time to think about anything else. Then they got swept and Connor did nothing but eat ice cream for a week like he just had his first heartbreak. And after that…well, he just hates confrontation.
He keeps telling himself that he’ll get around to it, that he just wants to gather his thoughts but he knows he’s stalling at this point. Mostly because -
“So did you do what we talked about last session?” Sophie, his therapist, asks him at the beginning of his appointment.
-his therapist calls him on his bulshit. And he realizes that’s the whole reason he pays her, but it’s still rude.
“About that…” Connor trails off.
She gives him an amused smile, “Connor, you know I don’t like telling you what to do but I strongly suggest you talk to Leon.”
“Sophie, my girlfriend gave birth, we started playoffs and got swept all in the last two weeks,” he says with an exasperated sigh, “I deserve a little time for myself. Isn’t that what you told me last week?”
“I was getting to that,” she says.
Connor almost didn’t show up to his first session. He spent the whole ride over that he his therapist would be a quiet homophobe and who’d sell his story to the presses and ruin his life.
But then he went in and saw the framed photo of Sophie and her wife and their twins. He let out a sigh of relief and felt more comfortable telling her about his life. She didn’t even really watch hockey and she told him that he thought he was a “good player” for his age. Connor always has to stop himself from laughing whenever she tries to compliment his playing style. She’s adorable.
“And what about  (Y?N)? Have you thought about what you were going to say to her?”
He knows. He just doesn’t know if you’ll want the same thing.
“I have, a little bit.”
“And would you like to share what you’ve been thinking about?”
“I-uh,” he swallows, “I want another baby?”
“Is that a question?”
“I don’t think so.”
Sophie sends him home with the same homework he had last week: try to slowly figure out what he wants to say when he’s eventually ready to have a talk.
When he comes home, Leon’s standing in the kitchen by Emillia’s bottle warmer. He looks stupid hot holding a baby and Connor’s only mildly annotated about it.
“Hey,” he flashes Connor a bright smile when he notices Connor’s presence, “Can you hold her while I make her a bottle?”
“Sure,” He takes Emilia from Leon before sliding the dimmer down on the light switch. Her eyes slowly open in the dim light and her gumless smile warms Connor’s heart.
“Hello sweet girl,” he coos, watching as she somehow wiggles an arm loose from her blanket, “I love you. I hope you had a good morning.”
He doesn’t expect her to answer, obviously, but she does start to open and close her mouth, indicating she's hungry.
“Leo, you’re too slow,” he taunts playfully, watching as Leon carefully measures out the formula, “she’s starving over here.”
“I can only move so fast,” he laughs.
When Leon finally gets Emilia her bottle Connor relaxes into the dining room chair as she eats her lunch.
“How was therapy?”
Connor told you and Leon that he started going when he came home from his session. Connor didn’t divulge everything that happened in his sessions but it felt nice to have someone ask.
“It was good,” he says, leaning over and resting his head on Leon’s shoulder, “I only cried a little this time.”
Leon chuckles, “Does that mean therapy’s working?”
“Probably.”
~~~
Connor can’t help but laugh when he rewatches the interview of Leon talking about Emilia. He manages to somehow be adorable and sarcastic at the same time. You’re settled against his chest with your ipad resting on your lap and he can feel your giggles as Leon gives his short, glib answers to the journalists' annoying questions.
(Congratulations, she’s very cute.
“I know. She is my daughter after all.”
Your girlfriend’s not going to get mad about that comment?
“She’s gonna get mad if you keep asking questions about her newborn.”)
“I can’t believe you haven’t seen this yet,” Connor says as he runs his fingers through your hair.”
“Neither can I,” you giggle as Leon looks into the camera like he’s on the Office.
Leon rolls his eyes as he emerges from the bathroom, now freshly shaven.
“It’s not that funny,” he says.
“Don’t sell yourself short, Leo,” Connor says, gently hooking his fingers in Leon’s chain to pull him down for a kiss, “You’re very funny.”
“Why did you shave?” you say as Leon turns to give you a kiss, “Your beard looked so good.”
“It was also getting super scratchy,” Connor says.
Leon gets under the covers on Connor’s otherside, “Yeah Emilia’s been distracting me from the beard routine.”
You scoff, “the scratch is the best part, Con.”
“Tell that to the scratch marks on my ass,” Connor says without thinking, and then immediately blushes.
You groan, “Don’t talk about anything remotely sexy when my poor vagina is still healing from pushing out a whole watermelon.”
Leon laughs, “Don’t worry, baby, the beard will be back by the time you get your 6 week all clear.”
~~~
(5 weeks later - after your 6 week all appointment)
“Guess what bitches,” you shout as you enter the kitchen, “I can finally have sex again.”
“Mhm,” Leon hums, feigning disinterest, “And what would you like me to do about that?”
“You’re mean and not funny,” you say lightly hip-checking him, “Besides I have two boyfriends for a reason.”
“Yeah about that,” Connor stretches and yawns, “Emilia kept me up last night so I was gonna take a nap.”
You blink, “I will go to Whyte Av and find some rando to screw in a coat closet, don’t fucking test me.”
Leon grabs your hips and pulls you against his body so your back is flush against his chest before walking forward and pressing your hips into the kitchen counter.
“As if I could pass up the opportunity to fuck this sweet little pussy,” he grinds his hips, pushing your hips further into the counter.
“What have you been cleared for?”
“L-light, non-strenous sex.”
Connor laughs, “Boring, but better than nothing.”
“Davo, take her upstairs,” Leon commands so Connor scoops you up and carries you bridal style to the bedroom.
“Wait wait,” you say when they reach the top, “Where’s Emilia.”
“She’s napping in her crib,” Connor says as he drops you onto the bed, “Leo’s gonna check on her before he comes. So you can turn your brain off for a little bit.”
Connor doesn’t wait to hear your answer, just presses his lips to yours. He fels you moan against him. Connor’s hands slide under your shirt, slowly exposing skin. When he gets it over your head he trails his kisses down your body, unhooking your bra as he does. His kisses move in between your breasts to your belly.
“Beautiful,” he murmurs as he kisses your belly button, “you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever met.”
He hooks his fingers on your shorts, pulling them down your legs. He settles himself on the bed as he spreads your legs to press kisses to your inner thigh.
“Perfect,” Connor says, lightly nipping at the sensitive skin.
The tiny hitch of your breath causes all of his blood to rush straight to his dick, but he can’t bring himself to care. He takes his time, warming you up with kisses to your inner thighs, gently scraping his teeth against the skin. He kisses your pussy before running his tongue through your folds. His tongue gently caresses your clit with his tongue. Your hand comes down in his hair when he sucks your clit into his mouth. Your hips start to move against his face, grinding down to give yourself more friction.
“So impatient,” he hums, fucking one finger in you.
“It’s been six whole weeks,” you say,  “I haven’t gone six weeks without sex since I was a virgin.”
Connor chuckles, “Easy baby, we’ll get there.”
~~~
Connor can’t help himself when he sees you changing Emilia’s onesie in her nursery. He walks up behind you, wraps his arms around your waist and rests his head on your shoulder.
“Good morning,” he says, planting a kiss on your cheek, “And good morning to the world’s most adorable baby.”
Emilia gurgles but doesn’t retort. Smh, someone needs to teach her how to be humble.
“Morning,” you reply, buttoning up her fresh onesie, “How’d you sleep?”
“Good,” he responds with another kiss, “Except when you kicked me in my ribs.”
“I take offense to that,” you raise an eyebrow, “I am an angel in bed. And, yes, pun intended.”
Connor snorts, “We both know that's a lie.”
Both Connor and Leon have been victims of your aggressive sleeping style. One of these days he’s gonna tie all your limbs down, and not in a sexy way. But not in a murderous way either, let’s make that clear. In a Connor-wants-one-singular-night-to-not-get-punched-in-his-sleep way.
Oh god, his brain is rambling. Oh god, he does not want to do this.
“(Y/N),” he says before he can talk himself out of it, “I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something.”
“About what?” you ask, holding Emilia close as you sit down in the rocking chair.
“I…” Connor has never been this sweaty in his life, “I want another baby.”
“Oh,” you say, indifferent, “Congratulations.”
His brow furrows, “what?”
“On growing a uterus,” you arch an eyebrow, “Because I sure as hell am not using mine again for like 3 years.”
Connor laughs, “I wasn’t saying right away. But, I just want to know if it’s something on the table.”
“I want another baby,” you say, “And as long as you’re willing to wait, I don’t see why it would be an issue.”
~~~
And Connor definitely feels lighter after his talk with you. And he even impresses Sophie by actually doing his homework for once:
“So did you talk to Leon yet?” She asks after he’s finished giving his rundown of his week.
“No,” he says sheepishly, “But I did talk to (Y/N) about having another baby.”
She has the professionalism to not look shocked, but Connor is getting a little better at reading her. Or at least he thinks he is. He still gets anxious whenever she writes things on her notepad, “and how did that go?”
“Honestly, it was better than I expected.”
“How so?”
He shrugs, “I guess I was just expecting the worst?”
“And why is that?”
He shrugs again, “Isn’t that something that you’re supposed to figure out when you psychoanalyze me at the beginning of every session?”
Sophie throws her head back in laughter, “You do know I can’t read your mind right.”
It sure feels like she can sometimes. Which is why he pays her but still, it’s rude. ~~~
Connor thought he was sweaty and anxious before talking to you. However, when it comes time to talk to Leon he also feels nauseous. Like, he might throw up in the kitchen sink again nauseously. But he’s been sitting on this for a few months now - but what if Leon hates him. What if he doesn't want to be with Connor anymore. What if he asks for a trade?
No, Connor’s spiraling. Leon’s a rational person; he's not gonna hate Connor for talking about his feelings, something Leon encourages because Connor tends to bottle things up until he explodes.
But what if-
No. No spiraling, yet.
“Leo,” Leon hums against Connors chest from his spot on the couch next to him, “You still awake?”
“Yeah,” he says quietly, “But I was thinking about going upstairs soon.”
Connor shuts the TV off, “Um, actually before that can we...talk?”
Leon sits up and stretches, “What about?”
Connor takes a deep breath, “I think - I think I’m mad at you?”
Leon looks a little confused, and Connor can’t say he blames him, “You think you’re mad at me?”
“I-yeah,” he takes another breath, “I know you’ve been trying really hard to reconcile with (Y/N), and that’s great, and I’m definitely not trying to say I take priority over her, but it kind of feels like you’ve put me on the backburner a bit.”
Leon nods, “How so?”
Connor shrugs, “I mean, when you came back and you apologized it was definitely pointed towards her. And it’s the little things, like you always make what (Y/N) wants for dinner and not me. It feels a little bit like there’s a hierarchy here.”
“Do you...feel this way with (Y/N) too?”
“A little bit,” he says, “But mostly with things concerning Emilia, so it’s not as big of an issue.”
Connor realized he feels a bit…scorned, for lack of a better word. Connor was with you first, and that’s not something he feels jealous about but now it’s all coming up. Connor never left you, Connor was the one who held back your hair and wiped your tears when Leon was MIA. Connor was there, Leon left.
...maybe he did need to talk to you some more.
~~~
Connor and Leon spend a long time talking on the couch before they join you in bed. Eventually, Leon puts his head in Connor’s lap as the conversation turns mundane and they just enjoy each other’s presence. It’s been a while since they’ve done that. They end the night with a little make out session that doesn’t lead anywhere more. It was nice.
The next morning Connor’s on baby duty. Not that he minds, it’s always nice to start his day with a smile from Emilia. He changes her diaper and puts a fresh sleeper on her, listening to the little baby noises she makes. When he’s finished he takes her downstairs to the kitchen where you and Leon are making breakfast.
“Good morning, babe,” Leon says when Connor turns the corner, “Do you want strawberries or blueberries on your french toast?”
Leon was making his favourite breakfast. Connor can’t stop the smile from spreading on his face.
“And how’s my favourite girl?” he asks, giving Emilia a little kiss on her forehead.
“A pooping machine,” Connor responds to her, and Emilia laughs at him.
“Did she just-?” you get from your spot on the barstool and run to Connor’s side.
“Her first laugh?” Connor says, “Yeah.”
He tickles her belly in an effort to get her to keep laughing, but she chooses that moment to be a stubborn newborn and frowns instead.
He looks at Leon, “She is absolutely your baby.”
“I smiled when I was a baby!”
“No, Leo he’s got a point,” you say in between funny faces, “your mom said she has one baby photo of you smiling because you would refuse to smile for the camera.”
“I was shy.”
“You’re a robot,” Connor says.
“Like you’re one to talk,” you scoff.
~~~
“Connor please,” you pant, “I don’t know what I did to deserve this.”
Connor holds back a laugh, watching the sweat drip down your face, “I thought this is what you wanted?”
“Leo!,” you yell, catching his attention from across the room, “Tell Connor he’s being an ass.”
Leon does not hold back his laugh, “He’s got a point.”
“I can’t believe I’m getting bullied right now.”
Connor wraps his arms around you and pulls you close into his body, “It’s just some squats, baby, it’s not the end of the world.”
“It is when you keep adding weight!”
“Because you’re stronger.”
You just stare at him and, honestly, Connor feels a little scared.
“Tell you what,” he leans down so he can whisper in your ear, “If you make it through your sets, without complaining, Leo and I will take turns eating you out tears run down your pretty little face.”
“Promise?” you hold out your pinky.
Emilia’s being babysat by her grandparents so Connor feels no qualms when he links his pinky with yours, “Promise.”
“Promise what?” Leon pipes up from his place on the leg press.
“Connor offered up your body in exchange for squats,” you say, shouldering the bar once more.
“And what did Connor say I would do?”
“You’ll find out,” Connor says, waving a hand at Leon nonchalantly.
“I don’t even get to know how I’m being used as a bargaining chip?”
“Nope,” Connor says with a smile, popping the ‘p’.
~~~
Leon learns what the exact terms and conditions are of the agreement about an hour later. And, just like Connor expected, he does not complain.
He even has the audacity to wink at Connor as he’s tongue-deep in pussy. Ugh, he forgot what the butterflies in his stomach felt like when he’s not constantly annoyed with Leon. He can’t help himself, he gets up from where he was giving his jaw a break, and slides his fingers over Leon’s hole. Leon tenses up ever so slightly, he breaks the momentum he had on you, evident by how hard your ankles are digging into Leon’s shoulders.
“Don’t stop,” Connor grunts, slipping one digit past the rim, “You don’t cum until she does.”
He slides his finger all the way before uncapping the lube and lathering his fingers up and adding a second. Connor knows when he hits Leon’s prostate when He lets out a low groan into your cunt.
“Fuuuuuuck,” you whine, writhing against the sheets.
Leon pushes back on Connor’s fingers at the same time your hips start to grind down feverishly on Leon’s face.
“Make her cum, Leo,” Connor says, removing his fingers from Leon’s ass and teasing his hole once more.
Leon’s focus changes completely. His fingers dig into your hipbones, pulling you closer to him so he has a better angle. Your chest is rising and falling quickly, heaving off the bed when Leon finally sucks your clit. You cum with a shout, tumbling over the edge, pussy clenching around Leon’s tongue.
Connor wastes no time, grabbing Leon’s hips to steady him before spreading Leon's cheeks and swiping his tongue in long, broad strokes. Connor’s not the biggest fan of rimming, but Leon loves it. Leon groans as Connor teases him, starts to rut against the bed when Connor’s tongue dips into his hole, loses it when Connor starts to fuck him open with his tongue. He reaches over to jack Leon off, pumping him as he continues to take him apart. Leon goes limp beneath him, reduced to nothing but moans. Connor speeds up his ministries, revealing in the way Connor’s name falls weakly from Leon’s mouth. Leon bucks hard against the bed, cums with a shudder. Connor takes his hand off Leon's cock, and places it on his own but doesn’t quite relent on his tongue, working Leon through the aftershocks' pleasure. It doesn’t take very long for Connor to cum, finally letting up on Leon and effectively ruining his boxers.
“Aw Leo,” Connor says once he can catch his breath, “We have to watch the duvet cover now.”
~~~
“Where is my baby?” Connor teases playfully when you walk through the door, baby carrier in hand.
“Calm your tits,” you say, placing the carrier on the kitchen counter and allowing Connor to take her out, “She’s home, and just woke up from a nap.”
“I wish I took a nap today,” Connor says as he rocks Emilia in his arms. She gives Connor a toothless smile and Connor just wants to smoosh her.
“Has anyone ever told you, you look really good holding a baby?” Leon says, giving Connor a quick peck on the cheek.
“Good enough to have another baby?” Connor asks.
You roll your eyes, “Two years, Con.”
“I’m just teasing.”
And, yeah, Connor finally starts to feel like he’s home again.
148 notes · View notes
feelingofcontent · 2 years
Text
DNP Rewatch: I Got Catfished.
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Date video was published: 10/14/2021 (X)
DNP Main Channel Rewatch: 447
A Phil story he had never mentioned at all before!
0:00 - just jumping right into it. I mean the title was already quite the surprise and hook. also I love his shirt
0:11 - the annotations! and that old Phil photo
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0:24 - oh god the MySpace flashbacks that this video gives me
0:30 - cackling 😂
0:40 - those were some surprisingly normal air-quotes
0:51 - “ah. what a wonderful time” I love Phil
0:56 - someone did once comment during a live show that ‘snow dude’ was the original catfish
1:03 - wow that is quite the set of old photos. I do admire his dedication to decide to “be” someone and then actually do it
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1:27 - almost did a spit take during my first watch of this at this point. Dan mention out of NOWHERE. also this particular comment that Phil liked... 🥺
1:41 - “just a dusting of gay” ... “we could make our own gif” I love this whole bit
1:54 - lol at him knowing what specific picture it was!
2:20 - just changed the name there from “Jake” to “Luke” within less than a minute
2:25 - more excellent annotation additions. he really had fun with those throughout his 2021 videos
2:46 - “I can be an eager guy” aww, Phil
3:01 - the sexy music! Phil must have thought “Luke” was the eager one
3:13 - so many questionable things that he ignored
3:36 - “compliments still stick with me, guys” 🥺
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3:53 - the “i’m actually a massive gay” annotation 😂 king of comedy Phil
4:00 - Phil seems to remember a lot of specifics about this story
4:04 - oh yikes
4:25 - the contrast of this to the 4-hour skype calls DNP had in 2009
5:01 - very gullible young Phil. at least he realized something was up...although not enough to stop him from going to meet the guy later 😱
5:34 - awww 😕 Phil is putting more of his feelings into the story than sometimes when he’s told stories about his past
5:48 - “I need at least three weeks...” I feel that. I cannot do last minute plans that involve seeing people
6:08 - I mean at least he went for a public location
6:24 - wonder how much he felt this same worry meeting Dan in person for the first time
6:35 - ah yes, a mall food court. many teenage memories I’d like to forget about
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6:50 - poor Kath 😂 I’m surprised Phil told her exactly what he was doing, actually; not sure I would have told my parents the truth in that situation
7:08 - Phil boob grab!
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7:43 - how strange but nothing compared to how recognizable he would become
7:50 - was just terrified of a stranger...decides to talk to and hang out with two strangers...alrighty
7:57 - lol at his picture editing here
8:06 - DITL clip! and “fetus Dan and Phil” mention. I was so suspicious of this at the time what with them having just filmed up in Phil’s hometown.
8:32 - dun dun dun. plot twist!
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8:40 - yeah how would you even react to that
9:18 - “like a villain from Scooby Doo” what a perfect description
9:41 - but that is still creepy. especially the asking to meet part. yikes
10:05 - Phil is almost being too nice about this
10:24 - yeah trying to get away as soon as possible seems like the right move at that point
10:43 - no Phil...definitely no
11:18 - “it’s not the weirdest thing that’s happened to me because of the internet” well yeah I guess he can say that...and then another Dan mention in the next sentence
11:36 - aww a nice message here at the end
12:02 - he had released this merch earlier in the month, but this was the first mention in a video
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12:30 - Phil had just started posting Shorts, starting on National Coming Out Day. that “beep tour” is still one of my favorites
12:34 - he flipped the image here for some reason? maybe to match the short? or because he pointed the wrong way?
12:55 - yeah standing and showing the socks doesn’t seem like a good plan...
I love this video. Phil is such a great storyteller and it had been a while since he did a full-length one like this. Also the contrast of this story that really didn’t work out, to the little Dan mentions and the implication that eventually meeting someone off the internet really really did.
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for @antiforlexpropaganda. sorry it’s very very late (and a super thank you to @caitlesshea for rewatching the scene for me and writing a transcript so i didn’t have to)
Maria knocked again, a quick rap that echoed inside. It was early but she knew Alex was used to getting up with the sun so she wasn’t too worried about waking him up. Or at least she hadn’t been before she spent multiple minutes knocking on his door. Just as she was considering leaving and coming back later, the lock turned and the door cracked open.
Alex looked faintly surprised to see her. “You’ve been avoiding me,” he accused lightly.
Maria shrugged. “Well, I learned you and all of our friends have been lying to me about aliens and murders and resurrection, so I haven’t been feeling particularly social. That being said I fell for your ex, so I’ve decided that even though I’m not speaking to them you and I are even?” She questioned hesitantly. She hadn’t actually spoken to Alex about Michael since that day at the bar and she definitely hadn’t talked to him before or after her and Michael’s very brief foray into a relationship but she knew he had heard about it. There was no way he hadn’t.
There was a look in Alex’s eyes, something Maria couldn’t place, but it was gone before she could try to figure it out. “That’s fair,” he replied. “What’s up?”
Maria let out a small breath of relief. She held up her mom’s laptop in answer. “Forgot the password.”
Alex raised his eyebrows. “And you want me to use my NSA intelligence cryptology training to hack into your laptop?”
Maria sent him a coy look in answer, unwilling to come out and say that yes, she wanted him to commit a crime for her. Thankfully, Alex let out a little huff of a laugh. “How does any straight man survive you?”
“They don’t,” Maria grinned and follow Alex inside when he stepped aside. He led her into the living room and settled on his couch, his right leg stretching out in front of him. He waved a hand to invite her to have a seat. She did, perching herself on the edge of the bench in front of Alex’s piano and looked around. She had stopped by right after Alex moved in but hadn’t been by since. He hadn’t done too much with the place but it definitely looked less like waystation now. More like a home.
Alex sat patiently as she looked around. She felt his eyes on her but she waited a moment before turning to him.
“How come you’re not mad at me?” She finally asked. It was what she had feared, why she had waited so long to come around.
“For Michael?” Alex asked, like there was anything else he could be angry at her for. She nodded and he sighed. “The mess between us will never be your fault. And plus you didn’t know my history with him until after you hooked up. That’s my fault. I should’ve told you.”
“No,” Maria argued. “When I found out I should’ve stopped.” Because while she hadn’t known in Texas, she’d definitely known after.
“Yeah, okay, you should’ve.” He was only agreeing with what she’d just said herself but it hurt to hear him say it. “But you couldn’t. How could I be mad at you for falling for Michael Guerin? It’s the easiest thing in the world.”
Maria wasn’t sure she agreed. “Yeah, until it’s not.”
Alex shook his head, a soft look coming over his face. “Don’t write him off yet, okay? He keeps secrets because of how much he loves Max and Isobel, not because of how much he loves you.” Maria privately thought it was a little early (or late depending on you looked at it) to be calling it love.
She had to ask. “You told me once that you would stay in Roswell forever if the guy from the museum would just keep kissing you. But you did leave. What happened?”
Alex closed off and looked away. “He stopped being that guy.” His eyes flicked away, focusing on something behind her. “I begged him to get it together, then he got busted for stealing hubcaps.”
“He was pushing you away. He does that.” Maria had watched him do it to Max Evans countless times over the years. “He hurts people to see if they let him go. Made out with Lindsey right in front of me.” There was that look on Alex’s face again, the one she couldn’t identify.
“Yeah, well,” Alex shrugged. “I didn’t need much pushing. He’d become this walking bar fight and I just could not deal.”
“Hey,” Maria said softly, aching to reach out to him but feeling like it wouldn’t be well received. “You grew up in an abusive home. It makes sense that you didn’t want to be around all that anger.”
“Yeah, and then the irony of enlisting to escape violence,” Alex huffed. “He was locked up the day I left. I didn’t even get to say goodbye.”
The words felt loaded, more so than Maria could understand. She didn’t know what to say. As the silence stretched on, she cleared her throat and stood up to get the laptop she’d placed on the counter on the way in. “So. Want to show me some of those famed skills of yours?”
Luckily, Alex took the out and followed her over to the counter, easing into the seat and lifting it open. He had to push aside an empty coffee cup and plate to make room. She almost offered to move them to the sink but Alex quickly ignored them so so did she. Maria watched him work for a few moments before asking, “are you in?”
Alex hit a few more keys before the screen changed to the home screen. Maria let out a sigh of relief. Alex eyed her carefully. “Did I just commit a felony?”
Maria shifted in front of the computer, absently settling in Alex’s lap. She only had a moment to enjoy the feeling before realizing how stiff he was, his hands in the air a careful distance away from her body. Swallowing her faint disappointment, Maria straightened with a wry look. “It’s my mom’s computer. Her nurse said that two weeks before she went missing when she wasn’t trying to escape she was talking to someone online. I wanted to find out who.”
“They let her have internet?”
“She’s a patient, not an inmate,” Maria retorted. Alex stiffened but didn’t say anything. “She uses her computer to watch Netflix and stuff. I don’t know. I just want to see her browser history.”
Alex clicked around quickly. “Somebody cleared her search history,” he announced before tapping away again.
“No,” Maria shook her head, suddenly realizing that they were really treading the line between concern and invasion of privacy. “My mom was the last one to use this computer. If she deleted it, she obviously didn’t want anyone to know what she was doing online.”
“You know that if somebody clears their search history, they’re usually hiding something,” Alex warned gently.
Maria scoffed. “I thought she wasn’t telling me her password because she couldn’t remember it. If she didn’t want me to see something then hey...” She shrugged.
“All the more reason to see it,” Alex offered.
Maria blinked. “I’m not investigating my mom. I just want to know how might have taken her, but she’s a victim. I’m not gonna invade her privacy over it. She has a right to her secrets.” Alex shot her a look at that but Maria ignored it. Maria heard a noise from down the hall but Alex didn’t even look up so she ignored it.
His phone buzzed before he could say anything and he checked it quickly. “It’s Valenti. I’ve got to go.”
About that... “I like Kyle,” Maria started, “but he was terrible to you for so long. How have you forgiven him?”
“Kyle and I aren’t friends,” Alex objected. “I’m doing this because it’s my responsibility. I’m doing this for Liz. You know, something I learned in the last 10 years is that sometimes showing up is the most important thing.” It felt like a rebuke and Maria glared at him for it. He shrugged. “Can’t stay mad forever. People have a right to their secrets,” he shot back at her.
Maria rolled her eyes. She was about to reply when a louder noise came from down the hall and Maria finally registered it for what it was: the sound of water running coming from the bathroom. Maria’s eyes widened as she looked around the kitchen again and noticed the two coffee mugs and two dirty plates. “Alex,” she hissed. “Someone’s here.”
Alex raised any eyebrow. “I’m aware.”
Maria huffed a laugh. “Sorry I interrupted.”
He shrugged. “You didn’t.”
Maria glanced down the hall though she couldn’t see anything. “Is he hot?”
Alex hummed. He closed the laptop and stood up, rounding the counter to fully enter the kitchen. He busied himself pouring another cup of coffee. She was about to refuse one herself when she realized he never offered her one. “In that sex-in-a-truck-never-introduce-him-to-your-momma-kinda-way,” he replied idly. It took a moment for the words to register. The realization hit her a split second before Michael’s voice carried down the hallway.
“Where’s the other towel?” He shouted at Alex.
“Under the sink!” Alex called back. He gazed evenly at Maria as he lifted the coffee to his lips and took a sip.
“What the fuck?”
Alex tilted his head in question but didn’t say anything.
“No,” Maria stated. “Seriously, Alex. What the fuck? Guerin’s here?”
“He sleeps over occasionally.”
“Occasionally.”
“Mhmm.” Alex looked at her. “Problem?”
“Yes,” Maria replied immediately. It had only been three days since she kicked Guerin to the curb and he was already in Alex’s bed? “Is he incapable of sleeping alone? Were you just waiting for me to get tired of putting up with his shit?”
Alex’s gaze grew cold. “Since you never bothered to tell me you two were starting something, I can’t imagine why I would be waiting for you to end it.”
Maria glared. “You knew. You knew we were together. You knew where he parked his Airstream.”
“It was hard to miss,” he agreed.
“Why is he here?” Maria demanded.
“Currently, he’s taking a shower,” Alex replied.
“Alex.”
“Maria.” He took another sip of his coffee. “I didn’t realize I needed your approval on who’s allowed to use my shower.”
“We broke up three days ago and you’re already having sleepovers with him? Did you think for a second how I would feel about this?”
“Strangely,” Alex mused, “my relationship with Michael has nothing to do with you. And also, you didn’t seem to think about how i would feel about you dating him.” Maria flinched.
She opened her mouth to reply when movement down the hall froze her in her tracks. Michael had his jeans and socks on, his shirt in one hand, a towel in the other as he scrubbed at his hair. “Thanks for letting me-” he froze when he looked up to see Maria. The hand holding the towel slowly dropped to his side. “Maria. What are you doing here?”
“She wanted me to hack into her mom’s laptop,” Alex answered for her. There was a strange note in his voice and Maria turned to him only to find him gazing appreciatively at Michael. The look in his eyes made something in her stomach churn.
“Oh.” Michael blinked. “Well. I should get going.”
“No,” Maria said quickly. “I should go.” She snatched up the laptop and fled with only a hurried thank you over her shoulder to Alex. Only when the front door was closed behind her did she stop and close her eyes. She didn’t understand it, she’d been the one to end things with Michael, so why did it hurt to see him in Alex’s home, clearly comfortable and not out of place at all?
----
Alex took another sip of his coffee as Michael stared at Maria’s back as she almost literally ran out the door. “You’re an ass,” he accused lightly.
Michael shrugged. “Did you want me to tell her I was in the kitchen when she came in and heard your entire conversation? I still don’t know how she didn’t see me.”
Alex didn’t know either. Michael had been downing his second cup of coffee when Maria had come in and he hadn’t moved until Maria went for the laptop.
“I’m sorry,” Michael said suddenly. Alex looked up at him in surprise. Michael’s hands were clenched around his shirt and towel. “For fucking up that summer. For not saying goodbye. I didn’t want to have to watch you leave.”
“Thank you,” Alex said quietly. He understood Michael better now, understood why he’d acted the way he had that summer, but it was still nice to hear. He cleared his throat. “You planning on staying here again tonight?”
“If it’s not a problem,” Michael confirmed. “The generator is still on the fritz and I haven’t figured out how to fix it yet.”
“Guest room’s yours as long as you need,” Alex assured him. It wasn’t the first time Michael had crashed at his place when the Airstream was less than hospitable and Alex was sure it wouldn’t be the last. When it happened, they functioned well as roommates and nothing more, even when they were on better terms. Neither one had ever been willing to blur the lines between their relationship and their temporary living situation. No matter what other people, Maria, thought, nothing had happened between them the night before. And nothing would happen so long as Michael needed a place to crash.
Michael nodded at him in thanks and tugged his shirt on. “I’ve got to get to work. I’ll see you tonight?”
“I’ll order Chinese.”
“Sounds good.”
They exchanged soft smiles before Michael headed out, a quick detour to toss the towel in the laundry room on his way. Alex fixated on the motion for long moments after Michael left, at the easy way Michael moved around his home. It made his chest flutter warmly.
It wasn’t a bad feeling. Not at all.
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13uswntimagines · 4 years
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Works Like a Charm (USWNT x Baby!Reader)
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Request: reader with the team where r falls asleep any and everywhere and on everyone? just super cute friendship and stuff
Authors’s note: Special thanks to @literaryhedgehog​ cause without her this would not have happened! I hope you enjoy and totally feel free to hit me up with comments and questions or if you just wanna say Hi!
You were the baby of the team, and being the baby came with very special privileges. The team knew of your sleeping issues, and the various methods you and your therapist had implemented (including scheduling yourself to avoid all blue light sources for hours before bed and sleeping with a stuffed animal (the famed stuffed Triceratops, Roary) each night,) to help fall asleep and stay asleep at night. But it had only been a week since you had actually looked for help, so it was too early to expect results, as you told them (and yourself) repeatedly. 
More often than not you found yourself sitting on a couch, Roary cuddled close to your chest, watching the rerun of whatever game had been on, desperately waiting for your brain to turn off so you could sleep. That was the exact scene Ashlyn had stumbled upon. She glanced at the clock, wincing at the bold 2:15 that blinked back at her as she rubbed her eyes. 
“What are you doing awake kid? Thought you weren’t supposed to do blue light after 9?” She asked softly, plopping down beside you, throwing an arm over your shoulder. You shrugged, leaning further into her side. You closed your eyes, burying your head into her warm arm.
“I literally laid awake for three hours. I tried not to focus on anything, or to focus on breathing, but I kept replaying the game in my head. So I thought I would watch it, see if rewatching the ending would help my thoughts, Idk, end too?” You moved so that your head was on her lap and you looked up at her. “Did anything I just said make sense out of my head?”
She nodded sadly down at you, her hands, stroking your hair slowly. You closed your eyes again, enjoying the feeling. You always wanted to be a cat when you were little. Your thoughts became slightly fuzzier, interrupted slightly when Ashlyn spoke. 
“Don’t fall asleep here kid. Ali will kill us both if we sleep on the couch,” The blond keeper 
“Just a few more minutes please?” You asked softly, cracking your eyes open. 
“Alright. Just a few,” she nodded. 
Coincidentally that’s exactly where Ali would find you the next morning. Cuddled into Ashlyn's stomach, snoring softly. From that moment, it became a team rule. It didn’t matter where you slept, as long as you were sleeping. 
*****
You were never going to live this down. Emily took a stealthy photo of you slumped against Alex’s arm, the climax of Black Panther’s fight taking place in the background. Kelley guarded your other side like a pitbull, just daring anyone to try and mess with you. 
“How did you get her to fall asleep Alex? She was so hyped up when we got here!” Emily said way too loudly, shrinking slightly when the veterans shushed her. 
“I literally just wrapped my arms around her while Kelley braided with her hair,” Alex whispered, glancing down to see that you weren’t moving before she continued, “she kept moving too much for Kelley to get the braid straight, so I just held her still like I do with my niece for family pictures. Once she stopped struggling, it was instant.” 
“Works like a charm every time. Who knew the world’s most feared striker could be turned into a puppy with some cuddles and pets?”  Megan laughed softly. 
“Yeah, yeah, it’s hilarious. Now shush and watch the movie,” Kelley said, flicking Megan playfully. More softly she added, “you’ll wake her.”
That shut the group up quickly. No one wanted to get in trouble for interrupting the little amount of sleep you got. 
****
You were sitting next to Alyssa on the bench during practice, bouncing your leg you waited for your turn to run. It had been a stressful week. Everyone was preparing for the first real game of the season and even the usual pre-practice locker room chat had been tenser than usual. 
Stress usually meant one thing for you. No sleep. It was like your brain had a death wish and just wanted to make itself more miserable. The dark circles didn’t go unnoticed by your teammates, hence why you had been regulated to the bench with the keeper when you weren’t running drills. 
Alyssa started humming absentmindedly. You looked over at her. She was biting the edge of her lip, watching Becky run drills. She stopped and looked over, seemingly realizing that she was making noise. 
“Sorry,” she said sheepishly.
“No, it’s really pretty! Please don’t stop on my account,” You said smiling and looking back towards the team as Alyssa started singing under her breath. “MmmhummmM, mmmhummM, So this is love. So this is what makes life Divine.” 
You swayed to the tune, closing your eyes, once. You opened them again, more slowly. Then you felt yourself blink twice more, more slowly this time. It took slightly more effort to open them again. You stared hard at the field, not noticing Alyssa scootch closer to you on the bench. Then you blinked again. 
 “Alright Naeher, you’re up,” AD called jogging over to the bench from where the rest of the keepers were practicing. She stopped short at the glare Alyssa sent her way. 
“Don’t think I’m going to be practicing PK’s today,” She said softly, gesturing to you with her free arm. The other arm was wrapped around you, keeping you from falling off the bench like you had almost done when you fell asleep. AD smiled, but then ran back to the group, unwilling to disturb you either. 
Maybe the pitch wasn’t the best place to fall asleep, but with the soft looks the team was sending you, they all knew it wouldn’t be the last time. Your health was important and they would help however they could. 
*****
It was like a rule on the bus. One didn’t fall asleep unless they wanted to get mustaches drawn on their face, or their cleats stolen. The bus ride to the practice field was long and supposed to be a time for team bonding, though it almost always ended up with Alex and Kelley sharing earbuds to listen to Hosier or Haley Kiyoko, Krashlyn watching some weird reality show, Megan Christen and Tobin discussing Re-ink stuff and the youngins causing havoc on the back, while Becky and Alyssa did their crosswords and Carli watched the road, trying not to get car sick. 
You and Sam had seats across the aisle from each other but would sit next to each other on trips like these, playing hangman or Super Mario bros on switch. Today was one of those days where you slid across the aisle, pen in hand, looking for entertainment to keep the boredom away. 
“That’s not fair. Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious is not an acceptable word to describe winning the World Cup,” Sam snorted, shaking her head as you finished the hangman. 
“You’re one to talk. Last time you gave me “jazzy” as a word to describe how it would feel to meet Mia Hamm. You realize that J and Z are like, some of the least commonly used letters in the alphabet?” You exclaimed, your hands waving wildly as you tried to prove your point. 
“It was a response to the fact that you picked a word that doesn’t exist,” Sam rolled her eyes. 
“Wacknut is totally a word,” you huffed crossing your arms. 
“You know what ducky, I think,”  Sam paused, covering her mouth as a giant yawn split her face, “You’re a wacknut.” She finished, exhaling and wiping a tear from one of her eyes. 
“Stop that, I didn’t sleep last night,” you said, yawning unintentionally yourself.
“Told you not to watch that last episode of Game of Thrones,” Sam said, stretching her arms slightly in front of her. 
“You were right, it was a terrible ending, and a disgrace to television, but I had to know” You mumbled, your voice growing soft, and trailing off towards the end.  
“I know, we were all let down by that one,” Sam said, leaning her head on top of yours, comfortingly. “I should take my own advice more often, 6 hours of sleep is just not enough.”
“Hmm, I know why they call you the tower of power, you’re soooo warm,” You nuzzled into her shoulder, her heartbeat soothing you. 
“Did anyone ever tell you the story of how I got that name?” Sam asked, stifling another yawn.
“No,” you echoed her yawn. 
“Good, they never tell it right. Once upon a time, there was a badass named me. The end.”
“Hmm,”
****
“So I know that we’re never supposed to wake Y/N up unless there’s an emergency, but we have practice and there aren’t any rules pertaining to Sammy,” Emily said too loudly, staring at where you were cuddled into Sam’s chest. The bus had stopped a few minutes ago and had slowly unloaded. 
“Yeah, they’re kind of impossible to separate without waking both of them up,” Lindsey nodded, showing Alex a picture she had gotten from above you. Not only was Sam’s head on you, the two of you were holding hands in your sleep, and your other hand was tangled on the end of her shirt like your dreaming mind had mistaken it for a blanket and tried to pull it up. 
“I have no problem carrying ducky, but I’m not tall enough to get Sam too,” Kelley said, scratching her head. 
Behind them, Dawn walked back onto the bus. “What’s the holdup people? We have a practice to get to! I’m not defending you to Vlatko if you’re late again Sonnett.”
You jumped at the noise, jostling Sam awake too. You blinked at the woman, eyes wide and suddenly alert, searching for danger. “What happened!” 
“Whoa, slow down killer. You fell asleep on Sam and she fell asleep on you,” Emily smirked as your cheeks turned blood red. 
“We just arrived to practice. You’re not late yet,” Lindsey said, punching Sam lightly in the shoulder and turning to grab her bag. “You’re lucky Sam that you had a sleeping meep meep to protect you, otherwise you totally would have been pranked for napping on the bus. 
“There’s no way in hell that meep meep fell asleep before our favorite tower of power.” Emily bantered back, shoving Lindsey off of the bus. 
“We better go,” You said softly, playing with the hand that was still intertwined with Sams. 
“Yeah, probably. Remind me to sleep with you again sometime. That was the best nap I had in ages,” Sam said absentmindedly stretching her neck to each side. Your eyes went wide. Then she froze, realizing what she had said. “Wait. That came out wrong.”
“It’s fine Sammie, I know what you meant, and I’d love that,” you bumped her shoulder with yours, then grabbed your bag. “Race you to the pitch!” 
Sam shook her head as if to clear it as you launched yourself off the bus. Then she grabbed her bag and followed you, sprinting to try and catch up. 
 Yep, the team would do everything they could to make sure their little meep meep got the best sleep she could. 
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loverboyromanroy · 3 years
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ok hi hope you don't mind a commentary but the ask you got made me think! i feel like roman and gerri’s storyline is a genuine addition to the main story, given how much she has been impacting his personal growth for the past two seasons. the show might be at a point where they could end their plotline but i honestly don’t think that’s going to happen! there’s a lot of room for development right now, their situation is pretty delicious and imo the writers are fools if they won’t focus even a little bit on roman and gerri’s changed dynamic. gerri’s not a family member but she offers that little outsider’s view to the whole mess despite being fully tangled in it herself too. gerri is also arguably a very popular character, not to mention the fact they already have approximately 1.5 female characters so it’d also be very dumb of them to not continue with the plot.
oh no please jump in! i totally agree with your points...and also thank you for reminding me of a point i meant to include in my last answer – gerri isn't family...but isn't she? she's shiv's godmother and she's arguably logan's most trusted ally (in rewatching season 1, the pilot is meant to make you give that title to frank but then they spend the rest of season 1 showing logan's reliance on gerri specifically – she's at his right-hand position during vote of no confidence, she's his spy and then surrogate at shiv's wedding, he literally likes and values her more than the other c-suite folks). i think that alone is enough to legitimize her as folded into the family when it comes to our central story...add in her very complicated relationship with roman in s2 & s3 and we do really have a lot of ground left to cover going forward 👀
also adding in a couple of relevant replies from that last ask:
@wonderpommey said: I think the only thing I heard was Kieran saying Jessee thought it could be interesting to have to have Roman be bi. They obviously followed the actors connection and embraced Roman and Gerri but pretty sure they want to go back to their original idea. that being said they’ve attached themselves to Roman and Gerri in a big way so doubt they can fully let it go. at least I hope not!
yes! that jumped out to me from the official succession podcast (on my main pre-sideblog 💀) and even at the time i found the way they decided that they couldn't have that be part of roman's whole thing like...a little dismissive? i was actually really glad they seemed to have circled back to it in season three (the trainer jerk off sessions anecdote coming back, the homoerotic bathroom scenes) and i hope they continue to peel back the layers of that part of his characterization in season four, especially given the way logan (and shiv and everyone) was hammering home his psychosexual problems in the last two episodes of season three.
@pinkmaned said: I read in an interview with Kieran that Tabitha’s job was basically corporate mentorship, but the scenes explaining that were cut. that gives me the feeling that they had planned for some of the beats of the Gerri arc to happen with Tabs, but with the chemistry between J. and Kieran I think they ended up giving it to Gerri.
oooh thank you for this tidbit! that makes a lot of sense for where season 1 ends with tabitha (his WILD marriage proposal after only knowing her for a week lol) and i could see in hindsight how they made that hand off in 2x03 (by having gerri step in and literally say "don't get your business advice from tabitha when i'm right here")...i did love tabs and thought she was a good and fun partner for roman, but god i can't imagine that season 2 storyline playing out with anyone other than gerri/j
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1980s-robin · 4 years
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Pinkie Promise
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Pairing: Steve Harrington x Reader
Summary: Reader and Steve are inseparable, even through dangerous times. But despite nearly dying, there’s just three unspoken little words that burden their minds. 
Word Count: 8.5k
Warnings: Canon-Typical Violence, Stab wounds, mentions of blood, cussing, basically just canon-typical stuff, pretty sure I clarified the reader as a girl at least once 
Notes: So, I’ve been rewatching Stranger Things because… ya know… October. And I’m in my Steve feelings and decided ‘hey! let’s write a giant fanfic about him’ so here it is. And kids? It’s a big one. Enjoy! I’ve been working on it for weeks.
It was meant to be a calm summer, perhaps your last ever calm summer - the plan after graduation having been to spend a year working to pay for your college tuition, or at least as much of it as you possibly could. It was a good plan, but of course, you didn’t factor in a Russian conspiracy theory underneath the mall.
You waved a goodbye to your supervisor at The Gap, watching her finish locking up from behind you as you pretended you were walking to the exit of the mall like you had done every other day. “If you need to get back in, you have your key right?” She questioned, you nodding as you pulled it out of your ‘hiding place’ - which happened to just be your bra. 
Once you had seen her take her leave, you quickly turned back around and knocked four times on the locked entrance of the Scoops Ahoy, being greeted by the face of your new friend Robin.
“Hey! Is everyone gone?” She questioned, peeking her head out as she opened up the store enough to let you in but not make too much noise - just in case there was still someone out there. 
“I think so, my store is usually the last to finish closing.” You responded as you looked around the inside of the store and followed Robin back into the break room, pulling a chair over to the table. Typically, when you came here during your lunch break, you would take a seat across from Steve but the inclusion of Dustin put you directly in the middle of the table.
“Well, Y/N, you joined a little late.” You heard from beside you, turning your head to watch Dustin sitting dramatically, his finger pointing accusingly at you.
“The hell is he on about?” You questioned as you glanced over at Steve, who turned to look at you and coughed awkwardly. 
“Robin already figured out what the code said but uh…. I don’t really believe it’s right.” He said with an almost disappointed look on his face as Robin and Dustin moved to the exit so everyone could leave. The code was figured out as far as they were concerned.
You glanced at the board and read what it said, your eyebrows scrunched together in confusion as you read the word but you shrugged and turned to face Steve. “If it is some sort of Russian code, I don’t see why they would say whatever it is they wanted directly.” You said as you moved over to the counter  climbing on top of it with the help of Steve.
As you slid onto the floor, your feet meeting the ground as gently as possible as to not hurt yourself, you watched Dustin nod in agreement with your statement. “She’s right, a top-secret Russian code wouldn’t be that obvious - it’s obviously coded.” He said.
“And I know my translation was right.” Robin added on, your head turning back to look at Steve for just a moment before you turned ahead again. 
As you listened absentmindedly to their conversation you sighed, almost relieved that you most likely didn’t have to deal with this anymore. “Well, whatever it is thankfully it’s far away from here.” 
Almost like a curse, the minute you turned back around Steve was kneeling in front of the mini-carousel ride and demanding a quarter. You had no idea why, you were just assuming he wanted to get on it or something - odd since he wasn’t five but… you weren’t one to judge him. 
As he finally got his quarter you watched with confusion written all over your face before you heard it, the song that you’d been hearing for the past few weeks but… then you realized why he was playing it. It seemed Dustin had the same thought as he pulled the recorder out, playing it for you all to hear the same song playing in both places.
You felt chills run down your spine, but as Robin reasoned that maybe they had the same type of horse in Russia you agreed - maybe because you wanted to believe it. 
But, Steve pointed out the name of the horse. Indiana Flyer. Why would they have an Indiana Flyer in Russia? The recording must’ve been coming from within the mall, and the thought of that horrified you. 
As you all walked out of the mall, you wanted to get away as quickly as possible, you followed Steve to his car since you lived close together - he typically drove you home. 
“Y/N?” You heard from beside you once you’d gotten in the passenger seat, everything seeming to go by in a blur since you hadn’t even noticed that he’d left the parking lot. “Are you okay?” Steve asked, watching as you finally turned to look at him.
“You want to go after the Russians, don’t you?” You asked, your head seemingly spinning from all the information that was being presented to you in that moment - it was a lot for you to process. 
“Well yeah, we can’t tell the police about it, they’ll think we’re pulling some kind of prank.” replied, as though it was common sense that he wanted to go after them - whoever they were.
“But Hopper he- he knows about all of the weird stuff going on, I’m sure he’d be understanding.” You reasoned, still not wanted to go through with this.
“Y/N… do YOU want to go after the Russians?” Steve finally asked, turning into the area of town with more houses, leaving behind the gas station that you both usually stopped at for drinks after a long day of work. 
“No I- It’s dangerous.” You said, but that excuse with nothing and you knew it.
“We’ve fought monsters before, I’m sure humans are a step down from that-” 
“Steve I- last time you almost died and I can’t-” You internally cringed at the memory of seeing him bloody and bruised, remembering him going out with nothing but a baseball bat and the terror on your face as you did everything you could to help. “I don’t want you to die.” you commented, glancing back down at your lap.
“That won’t happen again and… is me living really more important than like- maybe everyone in our town?” Steve questioned you as he glanced at you for a moment, mostly keeping his eyes on the road, though.
“They’re not you.” You mumbled, looking out of the window of the car, almost embarrassed at the clinginess you felt toward your best friend. All those years of watching Steve grow and change, feeling more than friendly things toward him and nearly crying every time he told you about a new girl and you’re just just attached at the hip as you always had been.
There wasn’t much time to think about this, though, as you felt Steve slide his hand into your own comfortingly, his other hand firmly on the steering wheel. “You can stay back if you want to, you know, I’d rather you not be in danger an-”
“No!” You rushed out, eyes wide as your head snapped to look at Steve. “If you’re going I’m going, you’re not getting yourself killed and leaving me behind.”
Steve raised an eyebrow, “So you’re implying we should die together?” He asked, trying to keep the conversation somewhat light-hearted as he pulled into the parking lot of his own home - about three down from yours. 
“I’m not implying anything, I’m saying that if this goes wrong and something happens I’m gonna be there.” You finally said, unbuckling your seatbelt before motioning ahead. “You want a sleepover or something? I’d love to braid your hair, Stevie.” You teased as you got out of the car, but even teasing felt wrong. You were absolutely terrified. 
“I want to walk you back, but since you’re so worried for me maybe you don’t want me walking back alone.” He retorted playfully, meeting you on the other side of the car.
You smacked his arm, “This is serious.” You said, walking toward your house with the boy practically at your heels. 
“I know, Y/N I know I just-” He stopped, not knowing exactly what it was that he wanted to say. “I’m scared too, you know, I don’t know what I’d do if I lost you.” He said as you finally reluctantly turned back to look at him. “But we have to do this, someone has to, you know people are just going to think we’re being crazy because of Vietnam or something.” 
With a sigh, you nodded. “I know that, I just hate seeing you hurt. I can’t imagine my life without you in it. You’re my best friend… I need you.” You said, feeling Steve link his arm with yours as you walked closer to your house, almost wishing you didn’t have to go in without Steve - just incase you never got to see him again.
You had noticed something stall in him at your words, maybe it was saying that you needed him - not that it was the only thing you wanted to say. But whatever it was that had given him pause wore off rather quickly as he composed himself. “I need you too, and I’m… I’m sorry to put you in this situation… again.” He said as you finally reached your door and turned to look at him - your worried expression instantly softening at his apologetic features.
“You shouldn’t have to apologize for wanting to help people Steve, I’m just being paranoid.” You brushed it off, moving your hand to fix a strand of his hair that was sticking up. 
Steve sighed and shook his head, “I understand that,”  He said, catching your wrist to keep some sort of contact - something that caused your stomach to flutter slightly. “But we will make it out of this, and everyone else will too. I promise.” He said, sticking out his pinkie for a pinkie promise - one of dozens you’d made with him.
You tried to fight back the smile on your face as you twisted your pinkie with his, “I trust you.” You finally responded, letting yourself smile. 
“Good, good, because you also just agreed to a sleepover when this is all over - I wanna see what you can do with my hair.” He teased, causing you to laugh. 
“Ok, ok, but if you hate it don’t cry.” You said with a smile. “Goodnight, Steve.” You finally said, rather softly, as you opened the door to your home. 
“Goodnight, Y/N.” He responded, walking down the sidewalk back to his house. There was a part of you that wanted to follow after him, ask him to stay with you or kiss him or something - it was almost always in the back of your head when he said goodnight. But you knew you couldn’t do that, so you just shut your front door and ran to the living room. Contrary to mocking annoyment at the idea of you not trusting him to walk down the sidewalk, you’d feel bad if you didn’t watch to make sure someone didn’t get him. 
Once you knew he had made it back home, you sighed and walked  to your bedroom, changing into what you typically slept in and slipped into bed. On a normal day, you might take a shower and watch a movie or something. But tonight you just wanted to go to bed, everything you had learned about the mall that day had just been too much.
The sound of your alarm clock startled you awake as you got out of bed, changing what you usually wore to work and turning to go outside. You were met, as you usually were, by the sight of Steve sitting in his car waiting for you to finish getting ready. 
“So, what are we doing today?” You asked him, sliding into the passenger seat and wrapping the seatbelt around you as you clicked it in place.
“I’m not sure, I’ll let you know if something happens but… I’ll just let you know.” Steve seemed to trail off, doing a U-Turn to turn back the way he had driven the previous night. For a moment it almost seemed like he didn’t want you involved, similar to how you didn’t particularly want him involved, but there you both were - directly in the middle of the Russian conspiracy theory. 
As you arrived at the mall, you left your bag in the car - again, as you usually did. Normally, you would be talking to Steve on the way in, but both of you seemed rather tense.
“It feels wrong going in here… I feel like we’re gonna be like-” You cut off, glancing around to make sure there was nobody that looked suspicious. “It feels like we might be… killed or something.” You finally said as you glanced over at Steve, walking into the mall with him, but a part of you wanted to turn around and never come back.
“It’ll be okay, they could have killed us last night probably if they thought we were on to them. I’m sure this is going to be fine.” He said, but he didn’t seem too assured. 
You nodded, though, because he really was right. The mall had your addresses from the checks being mailed home, if the Russians suspected that you knew something they could have had you killed already - and it made no sense to do something like that in a giant mall, especially when you lived so close together. 
“I’ll see you during our lunch break?” You questioned as you had reached Scoops Ahoy, Steve nodding in response. 
“Or earlier, if we find something and I have time to get you.” he responded, your heart almost dropping. 
“If you find something you need to get me, okay, or at least try- I don’t want you to get hurt I-” You were getting frantic again, keeping your voice down to not draw-awareness. 
“I will, but if something happens and you don’t see me during lunch promise you’ll come looking.” He said, watching as you nodded in response. You had to be realistic, something might happen and you might not be able to go together. “And you can’t pretend to be sick.” He said, as if reading a thought that may have crossed your mind.
“Alright.” You agreed reluctantly, waving a hello to Robin who you saw behind the counter and turning around, but for a moment something clicked in your brain. You might not see either of them for a while, if worse comes to worse. “Please stay safe, both of you.” You finally said as you turned back around, both of your close friends nodding before you walked to your job at The Gap.
The rest of the day you had basically spent most of the day folding clothes and answering customers questions, but your mind couldn’t help but wander. You were completely distant from everything that was going on, you couldn’t focus on anything. More than once you’d wanted to tell a customer to leave the mall, to never come back, because you felt like everyone was in danger at that moment. But you couldn’t. 
A while later, your lunch break started - as you walked over to Scoops Ahoy you noticed that neither Steve nor Robin were there, and you started to fear for the worst. 
It was a frantic scramble for the next few moments before you ran into someone, someone who grabbed your arms and pulled you in front of them.
“Hey-” 
“Steve? I th-”
“I know, I can explain, just come with me.” He said as he started guiding you over to a table. When you sat down, you noticed the people you were used to, at this point. Robin and Dustin, but you also noticed the inclusion of another new face. She looked familiar for a moment, before you placed that it was Erica Sinclair. 
“Why is-” You motioned to Erica, “Is she going to help us? What’s-” You were practically choking on your words, completely confused by what was going on as you felt Steve slide into the seat beside you. 
“We need someone to go through the vents to open the loading dock for us to get in, Dustin couldn’t fit and he thought he knew someone who could.” Robin explained, “And, she agreed in exchange for ice cream.” She added on.
You nodded along to what she said, wondering if it was a good idea to have her tagging along but knowing that if there was no other option there was no reason why the rest of you couldn’t just watch after her. 
The rest of the day was finished somewhat normally, with the looming knowledge that you would be getting into Russian equipment as soon as the mall closed. 
Ironically, you finished work early for the first time in a while. Your co-workers had been a little too diligent in making sure everything was stocked for the next day, granted, your supervisors had told you to be extra diligent for the next few days since it was the week of the holiday. While it meant that everything was going to be done sooner than it would have been otherwise, it also meant that you needed to break into Russian information sooner.
You quietly walked to where Scoops Ahoy was, you shouldn’t have been as paranoid as you were about going to see your friend who drove you home anyway - but with the given circumstances you felt like everything that you were doing was completely out of the ordinary. 
“You’re here early.” Robin commented from behind the counter as she jumped on top of the stand, sliding across it. 
“We finished early, I don’t think anyone else is still here though.” You said as you glanced around the empty mall. “Even if they are, I don’t think anyone’s going to notice us climbing on the roof.” 
It was only a few minutes later before Dustin, Robin, Steve and yourself departed for the rooftop outside of the loading deck - Erica moving for the vents that would allow you all to enter from that part of the building. 
As you laid on the rooftop, making sure to be as close to the roof as possible as to not draw any attention if there were to be someone who could be paying attention to any of you, you couldn’t help but feel like you shouldn’t be doing what you were doing.
There was just this feeling in your brain, this feeling that maybe this was wrong and that none of you should be involved. But, before you could allow your mind to wander too far with that idea the dock was open, and you were all climbing down the latter and walking quickly and quietly into the building before shutting the door behind you. 
It was eerie being inside of this part of the mall, surrounded by these boxes that you’d seen being walked through the mall and thought nothing of. Seeing them knowing that they were something else, something that could pose a threat to yourself and everyone else that you happened to know. 
You kneeled next to the boxes, watching as Steve opened one of them with a box cutter. You nearly jumped as you told Dustin to get back, but you did not expect him to tell you to get back. 
“If you die I die.” Dustin responded to Steve’s criticism, his firm tone seeming to surprise everyone - including you. 
“I agree with Dustin, if you die I die too.” You commented, high fiving Dustin above Steve’s head.
Steve seemed to blink for a moment, “Okay then.” He finally said, glancing between the both of you before twisting one of the tubes inside of the box and pulling it out.
You all stared in awe of the green, shining liquid-type thing inside of the jar that Steve was holding, having no clue what it could possibly be that he was holding.
Before you had the chance to tell him to put it down you all felt the room begin to move, only for a moment, before everyone started rushing to get the door opened. But the door didn’t seem to want to open. 
You let out a yell as you saw the walls begin to close in, and felt the room start shooting downwards. You fell over on top of one of the boxes, hitting your hip and most likely leaving a bruise. 
As soon as the room stopped, you slowly stood up. Of course, you quickly pieced together that what you were in wasn’t a room at all - but rather an elevator where the Russian’s happened to be keeping their things. Now, not only were you deep below the ground, but the doors to the elevator were completely covered over by a metal wall. 
As soon as you stood up, moving to stand with everyone else, you felt the need to collapse back onto the ground in some sort of defeat. “I didn’t think this was how we were going to die, of all the ways.” 
Steve kneeled in front of you, “We’re not gonna die, we just have to find a way out of here.” he tried to reassure you as he stood back up and started looking around for something. You assumed he was looking for some kind of emergency switch or exit, or maybe a way to get above the elevator in order to get out. 
But that kind of idea was quickly shot down, realizing that this might as well have been a metal box that you were all stuck in. There didn’t seem to be a way out.
“Maybe someone will come back in the morning, we could just…” You trailed off, making the motion of running your finger over your throat. 
“We are not going to kill whoever comes in here, Y/N.” Robin replied, a nearly disappointed look on her face at the way that your mind had instantly gone to that. 
“My point still stands, someone is probably going to come in here for whatever that green shit is tomorrow, if we hide I’m sure there will be a way to hold the door open. Better yet, maybe it’ll just go back up.” You said, feeling as if your brain was finally clicking into place. Most likely because this wasn’t the first time you were in a life or death situation, and truthfully it wasn’t the scariest either. 
“But what if they don’t come back for like… a week or something for another delivery.” Dustin added on, but you shook your head.
“That thing can’t just be sitting here, they’ve gotta do something with it I’m sure.” You said confidently. Maybe you weren’t too confident that someone was going to come back tomorrow, maybe someone wouldn’t be back for a few days, but you didn’t want to think about that. 
“In the meantime, though, we should try to find a way out in case whoever comes back tomorrow knows that we’re here.” Robin said, something that you couldn’t help but agree with.
It was about two hours before you had just given up, deciding that you most likely weren’t going to find a way out as everyone has scoured every inch of the elevator that you were stuck in. You gave the ‘Open Door’ button one last press before sliding back against the wall, a yawn escaping your lips as you leaned your head back. 
You felt someone beside you, and turned to find Steve sitting next to you, a defeated look on his face. “We’re not gonna die here,” You said. But you weren’t sure if you were saying it in an attempt to reassure yourself or to reassure Steve.
“Even if we do get out…” He trailed off, seemingly not wanting to think about what could happen next. “We were just supposed to come in here and leave. Not… get stuck down here.” He seemed frustrated and somewhat exhausted.
“We came down here to stop bad people from doing bad things, it just went a little wrong.” You said, wanting to bring some kind of hope into the discussion. But even before you didn’t have much hope that just the few of you could do much of anything, and now you’d all gotten stuck in an elevator.
“I didn’t want you down here with all the Russians, you know that right?” Steve asked, turning to look at you as you finally met his eyes. “I know you didn’t even want to be involved with this and if you get killed ‘cause of me-” 
“It’s not that I didn’t want to be involved, it’s that I didn’t want you to get hurt. It was never about me.” You said rather softly, watching his expression seemingly change for a moment as he got ready to do or say something - which one, you weren’t sure - but he seemed to stop himself when you let out another yawn.
“You can sleep, Y/N, I won’t let anything happen to you - I promise.” He said, sort of comfortingly as he wrapped an arm around you and let you rest your head gently on his shoulder.
“Goodnight Stevie.” You mumbled as you quickly fell asleep, the exhaustion from working and the stress of the day and the current situation being enough to effectively knock you out. 
It was only another few hours before you woke up at the feeling of movement, not really doing anything about it until you eventually heard the sound of a door opening. You were concealed by a box, and thankfully whoever had come in wouldn’t be able to see you. As you came to a bit more, you noticed Steve slide a box in between the doors that had opened to stop them from closing again. 
You followed everyone out of the room, “Nothing happened while you were asleep.” Dustin said from in front of you, your eyes moving over as you realized he was speaking to you. 
“Well, I figured, we were locked in a room - but I guess you never know.” You responded, quietly, as you walked down the hallway - your eyes practically running around the room as you made sure that there was nobody in there with you. 
It was a little while longer, everyone walking down corridors and you mostly being quiet out of fear that someone was going to hear you, that you would speak at the wrong time.
Eventually you reached what seemed to be some sort of communication room, but as you walked in you were face to face with a Russian Soldier. You froze for a minute, before searching for some sort of blunt object that you could use - for a moment considering throwing your shoes at the man. But Robin distracted him by reiterating the Russian code to him, and Steve seemed to think quick enough to knock the man out. 
“Good thinking,” You said as you turned to Robin - before your eyes began scanning the room. Finally, they found a door, and you walked with Robin to it, assuming that the others were following.
“Thanks,” She trailed off, seemingly distracted as she pushed open a door. You stood in shock of what you were staring at, the other three following you both into the room as Robin motions them in.
“Shit…” You trailed off, your brain connecting what you were looking at. Of course this had to be the reason that they were in a small town like Hawkins, seeing it before you made everything make perfect sense. Or, as much sense as a situation like this could possibly make to someone with a limited understanding of any of it. 
Quickly, you all made your way out of the room, looking for an escape before Erica noticed that the Russian soldier was no longer with Steve. By the time you’d all realized, though, it was too late. 
The only thing that you could do was run as fast as your feet could carry you, following after the other four. But you couldn’t be shocked that you were outnumbered, and try as you might to look for any type of exit it was obvious to you that there wasn’t going to be a safe exit - at least not for everyone.
You watched as Dustin and Erica quickly walked over to a vent, Steve pushing you toward them. “Go! It’ll be safer-”
“I can handle myself, Steve.” You replied back, urgently trying to get back over to the door with Robin. 
“It’s not about that, just go I don’t need you to di-”
“No! Not without you!” You finally yelled back, Steve seeming to stop for a moment before accepting that there wasn’t enough time to convince you to go with Dustin and Erica. You watched as they got away, knowing at that moment that your choice had been completely solidified. 
The next thing you knew, there was a swift punch to your face - the world going black, and all of the commotion surrounding you seeming to just fade away. 
You weren’t sure how long it was before you woke up again, but you seemed to come to your senses rather quickly. The room you were shoved into was rather small, almost like a mop closet but it was completely empty - a flickering fluorescent being your only form of light. There was no one with you, for a couple seconds, that is. 
Within a few moments of waking up a man walked into the room, leaving the door slightly ajar behind him as you turned to you with a smug expression.
“You put up quite a fight, you know.” the man commented, much to your dismay.
“I can’t… I don’t remember that.” You responded, which, again to your dismay, made him seem to laugh for just a moment as your confusion.
“No, you wouldn’t, we’ve already injected you with the serum we’re about to give your friends.” He said, glancing down at you for a moment, seemingly at your body. “Have you looked at yourself?” The commented, again, with a smug expression on his face.
It was then that you glanced down, multiple knife wounds on your body, blood covering the front of your shirt. “Wh-”
“The serum will stop the pain for a little while, but if you don’t start telling the truth soon…” He trailed off, moving closer to you and pressing down on the wound that you could only assume was a stab, though it felt as if it was covered by a bandage, “You’re going to regret it.” 
You watched as blood pooled around where he was pressing, but the serum was strong enough to make it only feel like an intense pressure, almost like getting a root canal at the dentist's office - you know something terrible is happening, but can only kind of feel it. 
At that moment you could only realize: he had mentioned your friends. “Where are they, where did you take them.” You grunted out, almost instinctively reaching for the man’s neck as he moved back.
“It wouldn’t matter if I told you, the way things are going - they’re not going to make it out of the day.” he responded, his thick Russian accent making his words harder to understand - but you understand perfectly clear what he was trying to say.
“If you don’t fucking tell me where they are I swear to God I will fucking bite you- I will bite your Adam’s Apple out you son of a-” That was enough to make the man swiftly slap you across the face, standing up and waling to the door. 
“If you don’t want the easy way… I guess I’ll just send in the doctor.” He said, walking out of the room and leaving you alone.
As you stood up to look for some way out, assuming there had to be a way, you narrowly dodged a vent falling from above you. “Dustin?!” You whisper-yelled, watching as he dropped from the vent and onto the ground.
“What the hell happened to you?” He asked, taking in your bloodied form. 
“I don’t remember- Where’s Steve?” You asked him, watching as he moved toward the door with what appeared to be a couple bobby pins he had gotten from Erica. 
“We’re going to get him right now,” He started as the door unlocked. “How is it that you got stabbed and your first question is ‘where’s Steve’?” Dustin questioned as he peeked his head out of the door way before motioning for you to follow him out. 
You followed Dustin out, feeling the familiar pressure of the stab wound on your waistline - now that you were standing, it was clear that it was somewhere on the far left part of your hip - thankfully far away from any important organs. 
As you walked through the long corridors, making sure to avoid any hubs of people, you found yourself passing by the very room that you last remembered being in - before being brought to another interrogation room. Dustin prodded a man in a lab coat with a large, electrified metal rod before you both made quick work of untying Steve and Robin.
Despite your current bloodied and wounded state, you still found yourself getting a lump in your throat seeing the injuries that Steve had sustained. 
“You’re going to be okay, we’re all going to be okay.” You said once you had finally gotten the ties done on his hands - resting a hand on the side of his cheek for a moment before turning to Dustin. “You know how to get out of here?” You questioned, watching as he nodded in response. “Alright then, good.” 
You ran after Dustin, making sure Robin and Steve were behind you both as you got into the cart, leaning your head against the wall as you sat across from Steve and Robin.
You tilted your head at their current state, before remembering the mention of a serum - one you were supposed to have had, but you just assumed it was why you couldn’t remember anything that happened to you; that and the fact that it was probably working overtime to numb the pain of your wound. 
For the first time, you pulled your shirt up slightly. Your suspicion was correct, they had put a bandage over the wound. But it was flimsy at best, leaving a large patch of blood on your hip where you had been bleeding through. 
You dropped your shirt quickly, shifting uncomfortably as you followed everyone into the elevator. Maybe it was how quickly it was moving, or maybe it was just the natural span of the drugs, but you felt your head begin to pound, and with it you felt the stab wound for the first time; a sharp pain coming through as you let out a groan.
“You’re not looking too good,” Dustin commented as you looked over toward him with a slight glare. 
“I’ll meet you back at the movie theater, just let me run and get a first aid kit.” You responded, once you’d finally gotten out of the elevator. It felt odd being in the movie theater, having just escaped from a Russian lab directly under where you were at the moment. 
As soon as you stepped out you quickly made your way to The Gap, knowing that there was a first aid kit kept in the back. You reached your hand into the side of your bra, pulling out the store key that you kept in there and sliding it into the lock - twisting it and making a painful bolt for the back of the store.
Letting out another loud groan, you grabbed the first aid kit and basically dropped onto the ground, leaning against the wall for support as you hiked your shirt up and removed the bandage.
It was a painful process, trying to clean up the blood and tightly wrap a bandage on in a timely manner - but you managed, with perhaps less than a dozen cuss words uttered. 
As soon as you were finished, you reached into the kit and pulled out a few advil’s, doing your best to swallow them without water before locking the kit back up and making your way back out of the store - but as you looked down at your clothing you sighed and grabbed a shirt and jacket, changing quickly before walking back out. Stealing was wrong, but in this case you knew you would raise some sort of suspicion if you ran out covered in blood. You locked the store back up and left  to go to the movie theater. 
You didn’t end up making it all the way back as you found the scoops troop gathered outside of the bathroom. “Wh-”
“Long story,” Dustin cut you off as you all noticed people beginning to pour out of the movie theater. “Let’s go.” He said, and you followed after him.
“What happened to you, Dustin mentioned something about getting stabbed?” Steve questioned, watching as you turned to look over at him.
“Well… I got stabbed.” You said, almost teasingly as you walked out of the movie theater area with them. “I can’t believe this worked.” You said, a small grin of relief covering your face as you made your way to the door of the mall - but before you did, your hopes were immediately dashed by the men checking identifications at the door. 
You ran quickly through the crowd of people, running anywhere that you could possibly run to hide from the people following after you - as you finally jumped behind the scoops ahoy counter you hugged your knees to your chest, slowing your breathing as best as you could as you scooted in next to Steve.
It felt like your heart was going to beat out of your chest as you heard the last voice exit the movie theater, your head quickly turning to face Steve. He slowly moved his hand to slide into yours, you weren’t sure if he was attempting to calm your fears or his own but you didn’t care because in that moment it helped you. 
There was so much you needed to say, so much you knew you were never going to say as you heard the men’s footsteps draw closer to the countertop. But then the car started going off, and after the loud noise of an automobile crash you popped your head up to see the men having been crushed by a car. 
As you glanced up, you saw the rest of the party on the ledge above, your face breaking out into a grin as you stood up. “We’re alive!” You said, rather enthusiastically as you turned to look at Steve. He didn’t seem to have much time to respond as you quickly pulled him into a tight hug, the grin never leaving your face as you pulled back to look at him. “I really thought we were gonna die for like… the second time tonight and I-”
You were cut off as you felt him lean in to quickly press his lips against yours in an urgent kiss. It didn’t take more than a couple seconds for you to pull him closer - even if it just lasted for a few moments.
“I’m sorry, I just realized I had some unfinished business while we were about to die.” He said as he finally pulled back, a small smile covering your lips as you looked at him. 
“That’s crazy, because I felt the exact same way.” You said in a rather playful manner, your conversation cut short as you hear someone clear their throat.
“If you two are finished making out, we have a situation at hand.” Dustin commented, watching as you both begrudgingly got out from behind the counter and joined the rest of the group. You seemed to tune out the conversation though, your eyes settling on El. She seemed uncomfortable, you assumed at first she must just be hurting from the wound you noticed on her leg, but it seemed to be much worse than you had suspected. 
As soon as El collapsed to the ground you followed after her, before you noticed that something in her leg was moving. You were all going to have to act fast to figure out how you could help her, and Jonathan seemed to be the one that had figured out how. 
You did your best to calm the poor girl down, but you knew that it wasn’t going to end up working.because there was no way that she was going to end up feeling better with the amount of pain that she was clearly in at the moment. 
It was difficult for you to watch when Jonathan brought back the knife, even more difficult when you watched as the poor girl got her leg sliced into, his hand going in to dig out the intruder in her leg. You leaned back a bit when she decided to do it herself, moments away from asking if there was anything you could do before she ended up getting the thing out of her leg and throwing it to the side.
When you looked up, you noted that there was three more people in the room with you all - maybe this would be easier with them here. Maybe.
As you stood up from your place on the floor, you made your way over to sit beside Robin. “Are you okay?” You questioned as you turned to look at her, but she didn’t seem to have a solid answer. 
There was so much going on, and part of you didn’t even know how to comprehend it even though this wasn’t the first time that something like this had happened. You did your best to listen to the plans that were being made, but you figured it would be easier to just wait and see what you were going to end up doing.
You found out much sooner than expected as you left in a car with Robin, Steve, Dustin and Erica only moments later to go find a way for Dustin to guide Hopper, Murray and Joyce through the mall. 
You quickly walked out of the mall, your eyes widening as you turned to look at Steve. “I accepted King Steve, not too sure I’m down with Daddy Steve.” You teased as you got into the car. 
As you did Steve sent you a playful glare, “You know you love it, who wouldn’t.” He responded back with a grin and a teasing kiss on your cheek as he started up the car.
Despite the urgency of the situation, Dustin seemed vehemently opposed to just giving Steve some normal directions to where he was being expected to drive you all, but maybe it was easier this way in some sense. Not that you were sure what sense that was, but perhaps it was easier for Dustin. Or, perhaps he just wanted to be difficult. 
You were rather calm, feeling the breeze in your hair despite the situation as you drove down the country roads. But what you weren’t expecting at all was the drive up a literal grassy hill. 
You let out a shocked yelp at the feeling of the grass under the car, and the feeling like the car was about to roll off of the hill. Thankfully it didn’t, but as the car cut out and you sat in shock you slowly realized that the car wasn’t going to work any further. 
You all got out of the car, walking up the hill and sitting down next to Dustin’s communication machine, watching as he attempted to get into contact with Suzie. 
“You know, maybe Suzie is asleep-” You started, but held your hands up defensively as Dustin sent a cold glare your way. 
You sat rather calmly in the grass for a little while, your eyes moving up to watch the stars before you turned to glance again at Steve. “You know, I did mean what I said earlier.” Steve said as he scooted over to sit closer to you.
“That you think I love calling you Daddy Steve?” You questioned with a tone of bewilderment in your voice as you stared at him. 
“What? No, I mean… when I thought that we were going to die I just- I realized that I um… I had some unfinished business because i uh-” He seemed to cut himself off, not really knowing what to say without being awkward. 
“I don’t know exactly what you’re trying to say but I’m pretty sure I feel the same way I mean I was literally stabbed and I was all like ‘oh god- but what about Steve’.” You said, more awkward than you intended.
“It’s true, she was asking about you when I rescued her.” Dustin said, you motioning to him.
“See? I just-” You cut yourself off as you glanced down, your eyes finding that of the mall. “You see that too, right?” You questioned. Steve turned where you were looking and his eyes widened. 
“Uh… guys?” He said, pointing to the mall. 
Dustin began to frantically try to contact the people in Starcourt, but when he did all that you heard was the sound of a monstrous roar that was absolutely not Mike Wheeler, or anyone else in that mall. 
You and Steve seemed to have the same idea as you shared a glance and stood from your place on the ground, running down the hill without saying anything before Dustin questioned where you were going. You didn’t know what you were going to be able to do, just you Steve and Robin weren’t going to be able to save everyone. But you would be damned if you didn’t try, at the very least. There had to be something you could do, even if it was the move of a martyr. 
You quickly got into the car, watching as Steve struggled to get it started before backing up down the hill. You were surprised that it ended up working, but glad that you would be able to have something that would, hopefully, get you all to the mall quicker than you would have been able to get there on foot. 
As Steve sped to the mall, you found yourself fruitlessly trying to find a way to look at it and see something, anything, that was going on there - maybe even someone from the mall having escaped. But you found nothing, no matter how hard you looked. 
“Are there any weapons or something in here?” 
“No! No there’s nothing here I checked on the way.” Robin responded, seemingly as stressed out about this as you were. 
Once you made it to the parking lot you saw a car trying to crash into your friends, trying to escape from the mall. You recognized the car to be Billy’s, which was odd since you had no idea why he could possibly be there. 
You hopped out of the now destroyed car you were in, looking around for somewhere to go before you heard someone yell to get in. You quickly got into the back of the van with everyone else, listening to the communication channels as you finally heard the voice you had been waiting to hear; honestly thinking that it was probably not real.
“Suzie is real…” You trailed off, letting out a laugh at the sound of her singing with Dustin on the communication channel. While it hardly seemed to be the right time or place, you were absolutely not going to let Dustin live that down the next time that you saw him.
You all made your way back to the mall when the commotion stopped, when it seemed like everything was over, to make sure that everyone was okay. But when you got there, you quickly learned that both Billy and Hopper didn’t survive the attack. 
You covered your mouth with your hand, feeling tears well in your eyes - maybe it was the stress, maybe it was because Hopper who you’d known was dead, or because of how El was going to feel after losing him. But you felt absolutely distraught at the news. Steve pulled you into his side, pressing a light kiss to the top of your head before an EMT stopped in front of you. 
“Ma’am… you’re bleeding.” She said lightly, pointing to the wound on your hip. 
“Oh- Yeah I… um… long night would you-” 
She cut you off with an immediate nod, bringing you back to stitch up your wound. You insisted that you would be okay without going back to the hospital, and she very begrudgingly let you go so long as you weren’t going to be alone.
It was a rather short, and mainly silent, walk back home with Steve. As you stopped in front of your door, you turned to look at him. “Would you… um… come in?” You questioned, Steve nodding lightly as he followed you into your house and to your bedroom. 
Neither of you really had any interest in changing, the stress of the day being enough to make you not feel the need to change - you just wanted to lay down with Steve. 
As Steve laid down, pulling you under the covers as you rested your head in the crook of his neck, you felt him mumble something against your hair.
“What was that?” You questioned, your head moving up to look into his eyes.
“Earlier, I was trying to tell you that I love you and… thinking I was going to die without saying it… I was so scared.” he said, his eyes soft and genuine.
Your lips formed a smile, light, but all you could manage after the long day. “I love you too, Steve, I- I think I always have.” You said lightly, feeling him learn down slightly as you met him in the middle for a soft kiss. 
As you both pulled back you let out a sigh, “Does this count as our sleepover?” You asked playfully, Steve letting out a laugh as he shook his head.
“No, expect me over for dinner tomorrow night.” He said matter-of-factly as he looked at you.
“Fair… I don’t think I want to be alone for a little while anyway.” You said, a certain vulnerability showing that seemed to make Steve’s eyes soften.
“You never have to be alone, you know that right?” He asked, to which you nodded and pressed another soft kiss to his lips before resting your head once more. 
“Pinkie promise?” You asked softly, to which he held out his pinkie, your two fingers intertwining - a moment later just shifting to tangle your hands together. 
There were a lot of obvious reasons to fear staying in Hawkins, to resent the things that you were exposed to through the life that you had - nothing about it was normal. But you wouldn’t trade it for the world, because Steve was the only normalcy that you needed. You knew he would never leave, because for you both a pinkie promise meant forever.
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chidoroki · 2 years
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Black Clover ch332
Alrighty, so… I debated whether or not I wanted to start rambling on about Black Clover once the manga returned after its three month hiatus (which, unfortunately for me, began right as I decided to start and catch up with the anime and manga back in April) and after a couple weeks I finally decided, eh, why not? So despite it all being relatively fresh in my mind, I know for certain I don’t remember everything by heart due to the quick pace I consumed it all (even after rewatching/rereading most of it again during these past few months), so none of these posts are gonna be as detailed in regards to theories and character analysis compared to those I’ve done in the past during TPN’s final arc, but who cares. I’ve come to love BC very much so I’m gonna chat about it anyway.
First things first, the boys look so good! Yuno looks so nice in white, which is weird to me because I honestly wasn’t a fan of most of his previous magic knight attire. For the longest time my favorite outfit of his was when he first joined the Golden Dawn. It just felt more “Yuno,” I dunno. Probably just me not being a big fan of the whole squad outfits matching each other. The robes are one thing, but ya don’t gotta look identical down to the entire outfit, save for a couple color preferences with capes. But yeah all that aside, this one is my new favorite! I love the robe matching his eyes and the cuffs/collar of his shirt to his necklace. The whole outfit has a nice, not-too-busy color palette and I like that. Asta as well. I prefer this one much more than what he had after the previous time skip. I can only assume he’s got that new brown sleeve..? I don’t even know what to call it really.. just to cover up his permanently corrupted right arm. Dunno why he had to cover it up though, unless to just not draw so much attention to himself, as we learn pages later that not everyone trusts his devil powers still, despite his new proven innocence from the trial. The devil-binding mark is out in the open on his left wrist however, but I digress. Oh, and I’m just realizing now that Yuno has two little bags for both his clover & spade grimoire. Ah, the obvious things I notice once I finally decide to slow down.
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But we can’t slow down. Nope. Because what do you mean a year and three months have passed since Spade?? What else happened after the war? So much could’ve happened since then.. would it be wrong for me to hope the anime (whenever it returns and reaches this point) gives us a little filler about all that? I dunno the general consensus regarding filler in BC, but I think the anime handled those episodes/arcs quite well. I was entertained at least, but I really just wanna know more! Aaahh, but our boy finally reaching such a high rank, I’m so proud of him! Truly deserves it after all his hard work. Also sorta kinda not surprised to see that Kaiser isn’t here? Granted he didn’t fight in Spade alongside the other captains, but whatever, not really important. I’m more surprised to see Yami without a cigarette in his mouth. How rare. Can’t say I dig the longer robe on him though.. or all the tiny clovers on Feugoleon’s shirt. And Nozel sweetie, I love you, but you do not need to add such large wings like that with your uniform too. Y’all don’t have to be so extra!
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It’s so wholesome that Asta’s family were all invited to the ceremony too. They must be so proud and happy for him. Same with the few Black Bulls (& Mimosa) who were able to attend. I especially like how its those members who trained alongside him in the Heart Kingdom. Well, minus Luck and Charmy.. and Leo now that I remember correctly.. but we got Vanessa here instead! (i’ll never complain about seeing my favorite more)
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We also learn Yuno was granted the grand magic knight title but Asta takes being one step behind him rather well. I’m sure he’ll catch up eventually. I do like seeing everyone mingling with each other; Yami going to chat with William, then Finral, Vanessa and her faithful glass of wine, and all the Hage residents at Asta’s table. A shame Charmy isn’t here to go crazy over the buffet, but I’m guessing she’s with the other Bulls who are currently out investigating some devil shenanigans. Probably. Overall it’s a very nice change from the first award ceremony Asta was invited to at least, back when he was looked down upon and attacked for having no magic and even Feugoleon and Nozel were arguing with each other. Yet here we are now all chatting together with Asta as the center of attention, for good reasons this time.
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Speaking of captains, I’m quite intrigued about the possibilities we hear for who might be the next wizard king. Fuegoleon and Nozel I have no issue with, but Meroleona? I mean she’s strong, sure, an absolute powerhouse in fact, but I don’t think she would fancy being in charge like that anyway. Way too orderly for her wild tastes. I do wonder why William wasn’t mentioned however? He was always the top pick earlier in the series to be the next WK, but if I had to guess then perhaps he doesn’t feel like he deserves it due to his/Patry’s involvement during the Elf Reincarnation arc? Or he could just not want the new position. Who knows? Not me. If I had to choose though, I’d place my best on Fuegoleon over Nozel (which shocks even me because I adore the latter SO much more, I’m sorry!). I just feel as if he would fit that sort of position better for some reason. Not that it matters since..they all declined at the moment, but still fun to think about.
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I can’t believe it’s been over a year and there was no progress regarding Charlotte’s feelings (though I guess that’s good for us considering we saw nothing during this last time skip and we certainly don’t wanna miss something like that!). Bless our boy Finral for reminding Yami since he clearly didn’t remember, or know anything about it actually. And I know I’m picking on almost everyone’s outfits/styles right now, but I still prefer Finral’s previous hairstyle (not the original but like, from royal knight exam to pre-heart kingdom time skip ya know?) I still like how it is now of course, love the green about it too. Perhaps I’m not used to this one just yet. He’s adorable either way! I love him!
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Charlotte isn’t the only one dealing with romantic issues however. Seems our girls are as flustered as ever. How did they all handle these feelings for over a year? I’d probably go insane. Maybe they have.
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I absolutely LOVE Secre interfering with their internal crisis and causing them to panic even more. She’s enjoying it all as much as I am. I wish she could give us a little smirk though, but her straight face is just so her. It works just as well.
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And then to the real confession. Oh boy. Again, love the girl’s reactions. Also like..just look at how tall he’s gotten?? Sure he’s still short compared to people like Yuno and many others, but here our boy just looks so grown up I guess.
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Not only looks that way, but he acts it too! He’s matured! He actually accepts Lily’s rejection and moves on from it just like he said he would. Then he recites his typical vow to become wizard king and Lily believes him, truly, for once too. Character growth for all!
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And then all the happy feelings go away because the final boss has now appeared. Lowkey happy to see this man because of the similar appearance to Julius before he “died” from Patry, but also not because um, danger.
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(this..went on longer than expected. i shall cut this here and post this separately from the other two chapters we currently have.)
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strawberrynamjoon · 4 years
Text
wine bottles & pizza boxes
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– genre: delivery boy!namjoon & lovesick!reader
– word count: 17k
– summary: while desperately trying to get over your heartbreak the cute new delivery boy made it to his personal mission to make you smile whenever you were drunk and lonely. luckily, your mutual friend hoseok was more than willing to set the two of you up.
or: namjoon fell in love with you, no matter if you had a pretty dress on or a wine bottle in your hand and a puzzle piece in your hair.
– warnings: reader gets drunk a lot and is kinda an emotional mess lol, humour and crack, sope being couple of the year, whipped namjoon, kinda slow burn
– note: i finally finished this wip of mine and i hope you guys like it as much as i do. like always, this is not proofread yet, i’ll get to it soon! <3
If anyone were to see you right now, you were sure they would think you’re a complete mess, almost pathetic even and, to be quite honest, they wouldn't be wrong. 
The way you were spread out on your couch, not having moved for hours, in your oversized hoodie and sweatpants, sipping the cheapest wine you could find straight out of the bottle while rewatching Gilmore Girls for the hundredth time truly wasn’t your proudest moment. 
But you felt hurt and you convinced yourself that bathing in some self-pity was the only possible solution for you to get over this stupid, aching heartbreak. If any of your friends would see you like this they would surely disagree with your chosen method but you couldn’t care less. They say time heals all the wounds but for now, wine would have to do the job.
Checking your phone for how much longer your pizza will take to arrive, you noticed a text from your best friend, once again begging you to pay attention to him.
[ Yoongi: It’s been a month since he ghosted you, stop being a crybaby and come to Guk’s party tonight. I’ll even pick you up. ]
A mocking scoff escaped your lips, rolling your eyes way back into your skull. As much as you loved him, you just felt the need to be dramatic in peace – and knowing Yoongi he would never let that happen.
Deciding to leave him on read for now, you heard the doorbell ring and the excitement rushing over you was almost embarrassing, considering the fact that your pizza arriving probably would be the highlight of your whole week.
Instantly regretting checking yourself in the mirror when you realized just how terrible you looked like you tried not to think about it too much, Antonio wouldn’t care either way. You looked disgusting in the truest definition of the word – your messy bun was an actual mess, not in the cute Instagram-model-kinda-way, no. There were big strands of hair falling out of it in the back and it floppily laid on the side of your head instead of the top. Your face was swollen from the crying and the alcohol and there were three fat, red pimples growing on your cheeks.
Luckily, you and Antonio, your standard delivery guy, by now were over having to impress each other. He has seen you in that state more often than your actual friends at this point and he didn’t have to act all nice in front of you anymore, your nagging banter the only social interactions you sometimes had for weeks. Thinking about it for a second it was almost pitiful that your closest friend was a man in his mid fifties who was supplying you with greasy food but you didn’t care, at least Antonio would never ghost you out of nowhere.
More relationships should be like yours and Antonios: Both of you did not annoy the other one, just exchanged a polite smile and some snarky comments every now and then and that was it.
Opening the door, you felt a genuine smile on your face, excited for the pizza you were about to eat, “Antonio, I was never happier to see –”
But before you could end your sentence you were surprised by a new face, a more handsome and younger face than Antonio’s wide and round face and grey hair. The young man in front of you had glowing, tan skin, plump lips and was not only tall but also equally broad. 
Looking at such a handsome man your own age, you became awfully aware of how you looked right now, feeling terribly hideous.
“You’re not Antonio,” the disappointment in your voice was hard to go miss.
The man in front of you started to chuckle and you were met with two deep and extraordinary cute dimples that made him look much nicer. Before you saw them he seemed kind of intimidating but as soon as he smiled there was not a single intimidating thing left about him.
“Believe it or not, I’m very well aware of that,” his deep voice sent shivers down your spine, “I’m Namjoon. And I’m very sorry to disappoint you, but at least I still have the pizza you ordered.”
He pointed to the pizza box on the ground and you just wanted him to leave as soon as possible, not wanting him to have to look at the misery you were for any second longer.
“Well, you’re just as good as Antonio then,” you stated, flashing him a bright smile.
“If that’s all it takes to make you happy your boyfriend must be living a happy life,” he mumbled under his breath without looking at you as he got the pizza box out of his carrier. His standards must be very low if he was flirting with you even in your current state but at least he managed to boost your self esteem a little bit.
You already pictured the little scenarios coming into your mind with the man you just met a few seconds ago and you hated yourself for how easy it is for you to fall in love with a complete stranger. But if all it took to distract yourself from the heartbreak you were going through was a handsome pizza delivery guy you would most definitely take that.
Handing you the box he gave you yet another one of those dimpled smiles and you wished you could take a picture of it, “I hope you can still enjoy it even if Antonio is gone now.”
Now you furrowed your eyebrows, “What do you mean he’s gone? Like, forever? I assumed he just has a day off.”
“Oh no, he actually got fired,” he answered with a shrug. 
“Wow first I got ghosted and now Antonio left me too, I thought at least he would stay,” a playful pout formed on your lips.
The delivery boy, or Namjoon as he introduced himself to you, seemed to be amused by your dramatic acting, joining in immediately, “He has a wife and children. You should’ve known better than to get attached.”
With a smile on your lips, you crossed your arms in front of your chest, “I know but he always brought me free sauce even though I didn’t order it and I just fell in love with his kind actions.”
“That’s absolutely against the policy,” Namjoon stated amused, “and probably the reason he got fired.”
The smile was still sitting on your lips as you nodded to him, ready to go back inside, “See you tomorrow.”
“Tomorrow?” Namjoon asked with a confused expression on his face, wondering what exactly would happen tomorrow.
“Yes, tomorrow,” you simply stated without any further explanation as you shut your door and walked back to the living room.
You immediately smiled as you replayed the previous encounter in your head. He didn’t even really flirt with you but just the fact that a good looking man stood in front of your door was enough to make you smitten at this point. God, Yoongi was right, you truly were lonely.
Just as you were thinking of the devil your phone vibrated, his name on the screen as he was calling you.
“Whats up? You’re crying or what?” you heard your closest friend on the other line of the phone. To others, the way you and Yoongi talked to each other might seem a bit harsh or cold but in reality, you were as close as two people could be even though none of you would ever admit it out loud.
“I fell in love,” you started and immediately got interrupted.
“I already pity the new man. Who is he?” Yoongi asked, the surroundings loud and you were sure he was on the way to a party.
“You’ll only make fun of me if I tell you,” you pouted, knowing the teasing will never stop if you tell your best friend about your newest crush.
“Me? Making fun of you? Never!” the sarcasm in his voice was thick and you could hear his stupid grin through the phone.
“It’s the delivery guy,” you tried to sound as unbothered as possible but because Yoongi knew you like the back of his hand it was pointless.
“(Y/n) –” he started, taking in a deep breath, “I know you’re lonely but Antonio? Isn’t that a bit extreme?”
You laughed, realizing that maybe you should’ve stated your words differently, “Antonio got replaced by a handsome, tall guy. don’t worry, I am not that desperate yet.”
“What do you mean Antonio got replaced? Does this mean we actually have to buy the dip now whenever we order?” Yoongi seemed to be genuinely upset about the fact that he might pay a buck more from now on.
“I’m afraid we have to but at least we can look at a cute buy and talk about how cute he is whenever we do order,” you joked.
“I don’t think we should do that in front of Hoseok, he’s crazy and might kill the delivery guy if he hears me talking about a cute guy,” Yoongi chuckled like he always did when he talked about Hoseok and you rolled your eyes, those goddamn couples all around you making you feel awfully single, “Anyway, we’re celebrating at our place on saturday, you have to come. No excuses accepted, I don’t care if you cry in the bathroom because you’re a sad bitch, you’re still coming.”
“Great, I’ll hate it,” you let out a sigh before hanging up.
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Despite threatening your best friend that you’d rather kill yourself than attend a party in your current emotional state, you somehow still found yourself at Hoseok’s and Yoongi’s dorm, getting drunk at their stupid party. You should have known better, in the end he always annoys you until you gave in, it would’ve spared you a lot of discussions.
“Hey Hoseok,” you greeted tonight’s host and good friend with a hug and he gave you a low whistle as he saw you all dressed up. Hoseok was, next to Yoongi, one of the people you could always depend on. When Yoongi introduced his boyfriend to you many years ago you first weren’t sure if their relationship had a real chance since Hoseok seemed to be the complete opposite of Yoongi but by now it was almost impossible to imagine one without the other.
“I didn’t think that I would see you here,” he gave you an appreciating and welcoming smile and you immediately felt at home – Hoseok had this power, always making you feel comfortable, “We missed you. Yoongi wouldn’t admit it, but he did too.”
And so did you – you were aware that ghosting the majority of your friends wasn’t the nicest thing you could’ve done but you were feeling blue, not wanting to talk to anyone else than your neighbor’s cat and the moon.
A small apologetic pout formed on your lips, “Missed you too. I promise I’ll come around more often again.”
On your way to the living room, you studied the people around you – most of them you knew but a few of them you never saw before. It still amazes you how, even after several years of being friends, you still didn’t know all of Hoseok’s friends. This man was like a puppy on the loose, making friends and fans everywhere he’d go.
A few people were busy playing beer pong, Jeongguk and Taehyung had the most concentrated expression you had ever seen on their faces and you wished they would’ve taken your many group projects back in college as serious as this match. Another few familiar faces were chatting and smoking in the kitchen, all of them sitting on the ground. Yoongi sat right in front of the fridge that was probably filled with nothing but a few beers, knowing that’s the typical lifestyle Yoongi and Hoseok had going on.
One could argue that after graduating and finding real jobs their need to party every weekend would vanish but no, they still were the exact same.
You felt a bit lost, not knowing where to go. As you arrived the party was already in full swing, everyone had their spot and you felt almost left out for a second, wondering who you should hold onto for the night.
After grabbing a bottle of cheap champagne from the kitchen, you decided to check out the living room – much to your luck, you found an empty space between Hoseok and Jimin on the couch, gladly getting comfortable between the two friends who were currently discussing which Team would win.
“It’ll be Jeongguk’s for sure,” you threw your thoughts into the conversation, “Come on, it’s Jeongguk. He never loses, we all know that.”
Jimin nodded his head eagerly, agreeing with you, “That’s what I am saying too! It’s two versus one now.”
Hoseok, who didn’t even look at you because he was so invested in watching Taehyung’s every move shook his head, “Tae trained a lot and got so good at it. I think he might stand a chance.”
Just as you clinked your cups with Jimin, ready to get tipsy, Jeongguk noticed you and his smile went wide, reaching his eyes.
“(Y/N),” he shouted over the music from the corner of the living room, “Join us. We’re missing one team member anyways.”
“I hate beer,” you yelled back, “I’d rather die than drink this cold piss.”
He rolled his eyes, not taking a no as an answer. “I’ll drink it for you, I just need someone who actually can aim, unlike this idiot here,” his voice was frustrated while pointing to Seokjn.
“Respect your elders,” Seokjin started scolding as he was aiming to throw the ball in his hand - and then, just like expected, he missed the cup completely.
“See, please, you have to save us,” Jeongguk came over to you, extending his hand to help you up from the couch and you decided to join him before he and Seokjin would start fighting. It’s been quite some time since you played beer pong with your friends but back then, you always did quite a decent job at it.
Before it was your turn, Jeongguk and Taehyung both scored another goal, gulping down their cups within seconds. There were four full cups of beer left in front of you and you prayed that you wouldn’t have to drink one of them. Why couldn’t they play this stupid game with something that actually tasted alright?
Glancing up, ready to shoot your shot your breath stopped for a second as you saw your opponent – Taehyung just recruited a new member for his team from the kitchen because he claimed that if Jeongguk could add a player midgame so could he. But you didn’t expect to be the new member of his team someone you’ve seen before, in a different situation.
“Pizza girl,” Namjoon exclaimed amused, his dimples seemed to be even deeper than you remembered them and he seemed to be pretty tipsy already judging by his pronunciation, “you look different.”
His relaxed aura immediately made you relax too, not even questioning for a second as to where in the world he knew Yoongi and/or Hoseok from. You did make a mental note to check with your friends about that later though.
“The power of make-up and a shower,” you shrug while throwing your ball and – the ball landed right inside of it, Namjoon chuckling as he gave you a thumbs up.
Jeongguk gave you a high five and ruffled your hair a bit, something he always did when he got drunk. Quite funny to compare this Jeongguk with the shy boy you met in the beginning of college but you were happy that he opened up to all of your friends and became a part of your group.
“Where do you know each other from?” Taehyung asked Namjoon, curiousity sparkling in his eyes.
“He stole Antonio’s job,” you sighed dramatically before Namjoon could answer, still not over your favorite delivery man being gone forever.
Taehyung playfully shook his head in disappointment, “You stole his job? not cool, man. Antonio was like our hero in bad, hungry times.”
“Always made sure we’re not starving,” Jeongguk joined the conversation.
“Also, he was kind of sexy, not going to lie,” Jimin joked from the couch, making you laugh a bit and Hoseok gag.
Namjoon threw his hands into the air as if he’s giving up a fight he didn’t even participate in. “I’m sorry, I’m sorry,” he sounded defeated, playing along with your shenanigans, “I understand I’ll never be him but I’m trying my best.”
Just in that moment Yoongi walked into the living room. His arm wrapping around your shoulder, the unexpected touch instantly letting you know that he was drunk because otherwise, he wouldn’t put his arm around you. Not that you minded, it was just something unusual for Yoongi.
“What’s going on here?” he asked, confusion written all over his face, “Who is Namjoon trying to compete with?”
“Apparently he took over Antonio's job,” Hoseok informed his boyfriend amused, “And now we’re mourning over the loss of our beloved Antonio.”
Yoongi knew that Namjoon just started a new job as a delivery guy and he also heard that Antonio got fired before, wondering where he knew that from. As he studied your face, you could see his brain working, putting one and one together.
He knew about Antonio from you. The memory of your conversation came back to his slightly intoxicated mind – you told him about Antonio being fired, but more importantly, you told him about your newest addition to the many men that you crushed on. No one else than the man who replaced Antonio. Which also meant, no one else than Namjoon.
His eyes widened and stared a hole into your soul. After being friends for so many years you two mastered the art of communicating with nothing but glances and his current face was asking you if you were actually talking about his friend on the phone a few days ago.
As you wondered where Yoongi knew that guy from and how in the world you never met him before, not even heard his name, you gave him a small, embarrassed nod followed by a slightly pleading glance back, begging him not to tell anyone.
You could tell he was trying not to burst out into laughter at the situation – of course, out of all the people in the world it had to be someone he knew. But at least he gave you an approving smile afterwards, almost as if to give you his blessing, something very rare. Most of the time Yoongi wasn’t a big fan of your crushes, not only because he knew you fell in love with a different stranger every other week but also because, in his opinion, you had a terrible taste when it came to men.
“Guys, (y/n) and Yoongi are doing their weird talking without talking thing again,” Jeongguk’s voice almost sounded annoyed, scrunching his nose a bit.
For a second you didn’t realize the tall figure that came over to you and Yoongi, his hands buried in the kangaroo pocket of his grey oversized hoodie in which you’d look very adorable, just saying.
Namjoon startled you a bit and you tried not to choke on your own spit as you noticed him.
“(Y/N), huh? Nice to meet you again, officially this time,” he gave you a soft smile and you felt pathetic for wanting to stare at him smiling forever, wondering how many girls were in love with him you bet he could have almost every girl looking like that.
Flashing him a cheeky smile, you nodded, “Nice to meet you too again, officially. I had no idea you know my friends.”
Hoseok stood up from the couch and interrupted the two of you, teasing you a bit, “Better get used to her. She doesn’t know how to cook, you’ll see her daily from now on.”
Scoffing, Yoongi shook his head, “Honestly, Namjoon might be an even worse cook than she is.”
Namjoon chuckled and in your mind you already knew once you were drunk enough and gathered enough confidence you had to poke your fingers in them.
“I have your number on speed dial,” you joked, a grin on your face.
“Living the unhealthy lifestyle I see,” Namjoon answered amused, “I can identify myself with that.”
Before you could continue talking to Namjoon, Jeongguk grew impatient beside you. He almost pouted while he dragged you back to the table, “We have a match to win, get your head in the game.”
And about twenty minutes later, you, Seokjin and Jeongguk were loudly celebrating victory with high-fives and hugs while Taehyung’s team was mourning over their loss.
“Next round!” Jeongguk annouced solemnly, “That is if you can handle another loss, Taehyung?”
Taehyung scoffed between his laughter, “I’ll crush you, Jeon Jeongguk, you just wait.”
“Your team has no chance against us,” Jeongguk laughed while refilling the empty cups with beer.
“You have to do without (y/n) though,” Hoseok announced from his space from the couch, “We have to snatch her away for a bit.”
Apologizing to a grumpy Jeongguk, you made your way to your two favorite people in the world, sitting down right beside Yoongi and Hoseok.
The shit-eating grin on both of their faces already gave them away and you knew exactly why they wanted to talk to you. Hoseok handed you a drink and you took it, knowing that you needed a bit more alcohol in your system for the upcoming teasing.
“So, you have your eyes on Namjoon I heard,” Hoseok giggled joyfully.
Glaring at Yoongi, you rolled your eyes, “I wonder who told you about that.”
Yoongi shrugged, with the same grin plastered on his face, “He’s a good guy, I know it doesn’t matter because you’re emotionally unable to have a real relationship but I would still support it.”
Hoseok hit Yoongi’s chest lightly, almost as if he was telling him not to be too mean to you even though everyone knew that you’d never talk without thick sarcasm to each other. Turning back to you, he raised his eyebrow before proposing, “I could easily set you up. I already have a plan in my head.”
You shook your head heavily, a short laugh escaping from you, “No, don’t worry. I don’t even know him, let me talk to him in peace first. I might come back to it though.”
Hoseok was known to be the matchmaker of your group – by now he must have tried to set up almost everyone of his friends with a pretty good success rate. But you prefered to take things into your own hands and he always respected that.
“So, are you over Jay?” Yoongi asked in a careful and caring tone, knowing it was still a sensitive topic.
And for a second the question caught you off guard. You weren’t over him yet, no, but you were at least wanting to get over it. That was at least something, right? 
“Not really yet,” letting out a deep sigh, you pressed your lips together a bit, “I’m working on it I guess.”
His eyes narrowed a bit as he was trying to figure out how you actually were doing, “And with that you mean you’re actually working on it or do you mean you’re getting drunk and eat too much junk food all the time?”
Despite you being reminded about your heartbreak you managed to crack a smile, “I don’t see any difference in those methods.”
“Namjoon,” before Yoongi could scold you, Hoseok suddenly started yelling, “Come over here for a second, will you?”
Panicking, your eyes widened, “What in the world do you think you’re doing?”
He gave you an amused glance, “God’s work.”
And within seconds, Namjoon was standing right in front of you, “Hi guys, what’s up?”
Hoseok gestured for him to sit down next to you on the small space left on the couch and he did as he was told, “Since you’re our pizza expert from now on we need you to help us resolve a burning question we have been discussing about for forever.”
Laughing, Namjoon’s attention was fully diverted to the three of you, “I wouldn’t call myself a pizza expert but I hope I can mediate.”
You rubbed your forehead, knowing exactly what Hoseok was on about, “Hoseok, don’t make him go through –“
He shushed you lovingly before you could finish, “Our little (y/n) right here claims that pineapple pizza is ordered as often as the classics just like peperoni pizza or ham pizza. And I say that’s bullshit. Pineapple pizza is not as popular as the classics, right?”
“To my defence,” you started, turning to Namjoon to tell him your point of view, “I never said that it deserves to be a classic. But I do believe that there’s a reason for the whole pineapple on pizza discussion and I think that reason is that a lot more people than you’d think actually enjoy it and they started fighting for pineapple on pizza rights.”
Yoongi was rubbing his temple in frustration, butting in, “They have fighting about this for two years now. Two whole years
Namjoon cackled at the heated discussion in front of him, before trying to put on a serious face, “Okay, I think I am the answer to your question. I definitely deliver as many pineapple pizzas as I deliver peperoni or ham pizzas. The only one that beats those three is a good old margherita.”
“HA! I told you so,” you teased Hoseok whose mouth stood wide open at the betrayal of his friend, “When will you learn that I am always right?”
Standing up, Hoseok chuckled while he shook his head in disbelief, “If you’d excuse me, I need a stronger drink to deal with this information.”
“You’re just a bad loser,” you yelled after him, celebrating your victory once again.
“Now I have to deal with his whiny ass, thank you very much,” Yoongi chuckled half-jokingly, half serious, “Good job, Namjoon. I better go after him.”
“I didn’t know that it was such a sensitive topic,” Namjoon laughed, almost feeling bad. You couldn’t help but notice how close he was sitting to you still. Yoongi and Hoseok for sure know how to set someone up even though you told them not to get involved, “Funny to see that Hobi is still bad at losing.”
“Hobi?” you asked curious, “I never heard someone calling him that before. Where does that come from?”
Namjoon was taking a sip of his drink before his eyes widened a bit, “I forgot that people don’t use that nickname for him anymore. We used to call him Hobi in middle school.”
“Oh, I didn’t realize you’re a high school friend of his,” your face brightened, “Tell me what he was like in high school. I bet he was a handful.”
The boy beside you scrunched his face for a second and you made sure to save as much as you could to your mind, “He was just as happy and bright as today. We used to be super close but I left home when we went to college and yeah, now after graduating, I came back home.”
“Welcome back then,” you threw him a warm smile before holding up your cup, “Cheers to a new friend in the group.”
Both of you took a sip of your drink before Namjoon got a bit more comfortable on the couch, his back now resting against the pillows behind him and naturally manspreading a bit, enough to make you go insane inside.
Mirroring his actions, you leaned back too, tilting your body a bit towards his, body language making sure that no one got the idea to interrupt your conversation.
“How do you know Hobi?” Namjoon asked with curiousity in his eyes. It might be a thing he does with everyone but his attention seemed to be laying completely on you as you were talking, holding eye contact constantly.
“Yoongi and I have been best friends since our childhood and one day he introduced me to Hoseok with the words ‘This is my boyfriend. Oh, and also I’m bisexual’, I will never forget that,” you laughed, “Ever since then Hoseok and I became friends. He’s too good for Yoongi if you ask me.”
Namjoon seemed to be interested in whatever you were saying, even though you didn’t really say anything interesting. The two of you were talking about everything, your college degrees, he told you he is working as a delivery guy for now to take a break and next year he’ll start to work, you talked about the town and the people attending the party – it was easy talking to him but that might have been thanks to the alcohol.
The rest of the night was rather calm much to your liking, you spent some more time with Hoseok, Yoongi and Namjoon before you and Jeongguk decided to go home together because you lived in the same apartment complex.
You couldn’t help but think of Namjoon’s kind eyes all the way home, almost not listening to Jeongguk rambling about the boy was into (he wouldn’t say his name but all of your friends knew he was talking about Taehyung) because your mind was full of Hoseok’s best friend from high school.
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Yoongi said that lately, you’ve been drinking alone a bit too often and you knew he was right – so once again, you were sitting on your couch but tonight, you didn’t feel half as sad as usually. The prosecco you were drinking made you feel giddy as you actually took care of yourself for once instead of crying your eyes out.
You almost felt good with the face mask sitting on your face for way longer than was recommended, your hair up in curlers as you were wearing your favorite pajama. The bedsheets you stole from your bedroom to cover you on the couch were freshly changed, your favorite playlist was blasting from the speakers and while cleaning earlier you found an old puzzle you were currently trying to finish.
And, on top of that, your favorite pizza was on its way, brought to you by no one else than the man that could possibly be the cure for your heartbreak.
You were surprised that you were in such a good mood. There were two possibilities: Either you were slowly going insane or you actually were getting better. Fingers crossed it was the second one.
As you were waiting for the pizza to arrive you finished the whole bottle of prosecco and you could feel the alcohol running through your veins when you got up after the door rang.
Taking step after step slowly, afraid you’d fall, you giggled to yourself. The way you were walking looked ridiculous, enough to make your drunk self laugh.
Opening the door, your smile grew as wide as it could when you saw Namjoon in front of you, his expression mirroring your own.
“Happy to see me?” he asked you, arching an eyebrow.
Nodding, you felt a hiccup coming up your throat, almost embarrassed when it came out but Namjoon’s chuckle told you that he found it rather cute.
“You always make my days better,” you sing-sang happily.
He was clearly amused by the state you were in, getting out the pizza for you, “Are you sure it’s me who makes them better or is it only the cause of my visits?”
You shrugged playfully, “It’s a mixture of both. But mainly, you’re right, it’s the greasy gift of god your visits are connected with.”
His eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a second, staring at your hair before another amused chuckle escaped his lips, shaking his head amused, “There’s a puzzle piece in your hair.”
Before you could do it, his hand was in your hair, fiddling with it a bit to free the piece out of it. Handing it to you, he let out a laugh – and you already thought his small chuckles were cute but the laugh of this man was on yet another level.
“Once again, you’re my knight in shining amour,” you smirked, the playful banter just adding to your positive mood, “I was looking for that, I was already frustrated because I was missing one piece.”
Namjoon’s eyes grew wide, a bit surprised, “You’re actually puzzling?”
“Well, where do you think that piece came from?”
Somehow, you noticed, Namjoon always had a soft expression on his face, as if he was admiring everything around him. It would be a privilege to be the one who gets to wake up next to that face.
“You’ve got a point there,” he nodded, “I just haven’t seen anyone puzzling in probably fifteen years.”
“What a shame, you should try it,” you told him, “I promise it’s fun.”
“So, you’re alone, drunk and puzzling all by yourself?” Namjoon seemed to be amused, “I can’t tell if that is the saddest or cutest thing I’ve seen in a while.”
You raised your eyebrow while biting down your lip in order not to laugh at his attempt of flirting and he panicked as soon as he realized what he just said, mumbling fastly, “I mean, I definitely have to try it again. I will for sure soon. You got me hooked on the idea now.”
Now you couldn’t help it but let a small chuckle escape, nodding your head, “I surely still have a few old puzzles lying around here somewhere. Why don’t you just text me and I’ll tell you when I found them. I’ll hand them down to you.”
Namjoon’s hand was nervously playing with the nape of his hair on his neck and you made a note in your head that apparently drunk and sober Namjoon were two completely different people. “I don’t have your number though.”
Still chuckling, you took out your pizza out of the delivery box yourself because Namjoon seemed to be too starstruck to do so, “You do. It’s on the delivery note.”
Embarrassed, he now let out a laugh too, “Oh, you’re right. Well, I’ll definitely make use of that then.”
Nodding, you started to close the door, “I sure hope so. Have a quiet and relaxing night, Namjoon.”
“You too,” he managed to say before you closed the door, “Enjoy your pizza.”
You were a smiling mess as you made your way back to the living room where the intro of the next episode of Gilmore Girls was playing and the next bottle of prosecco was waiting for you.
In your head you were replaying the little encounter, getting your pizza out of the plastic bag it was in – only to see yet another thing that made your heart melt.
On top of the box were two dips, one of them had a little sticky note attached to it.
[ Only an amateur like Antonio would put one extra dip. Real guys like me put two. Enjoy your meal, (y/n) :) ]
You giggled while taking a picture of the note and sending it to Yoongi in an instant to keep him updated.
Just as you hit the send button another message came in from an unknown number – Namjoon didn’t wait to text you and you thought that was very cute, you hated nothing more than guys thinking it’s cool to let someone wait for days before they texted.
[ Namjoon: What kind of puzzles do you have? I want a cool one with a Star Wars picture on it or something like that. P.s.: I hope I chose the right dips, if not let me know which ones you prefer.]
If you weren’t whipped for him yet now you surely were. He most likely didn’t care about puzzles one bit and had no actual desire to puzzle but if it was a good enough reason to keep up a conversation with him you would talk to him about puzzles for weeks.
[ You: I can offer you cute baby cats in a cup or one of those sunflower babys. I might have a Disney one somewhere but it had 2000 pieces.]
Not even three minutes later, Namjoon texted you back – making you wonder how in the world he was able to text you during work but you wouldn’t question it any further.
[ Namjoon: So what you’re saying is you don’t think I can handle 2000 pieces? Challenge accepted. And if I am not able to do it in the end I always can ask you for help right?]
If anyone told you that you and your delivery guy would be flirting while talking about puzzles together a few weeks ago you wouldn’t have believed them but you most definitely weren’t complaining – what an interesting guy.
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“Happy birthday my baby,” Hoseok said as he hugged you tight. Right after that, Yoongi did the same, even giving you a pat on your head – you knew it was a special day when Yoongi showed you physical affection.
“Yeah, happy birthday you annoying angel,” Yoongi smirked, “I hope we’re the last ones to arrive.”
Of course they were. No matter where you were going, Yoongi was always the last person to arrive. He said it’s because it’s his ‘branding’ but you were pretty sure it was just him not being able to time anything right.
Everyone was already there – not that you invited a lot, just Jeongguk and Taehyung, Seokjin and his lovely girlfriend Mina, Jimin, your best friend Norah and last and also latest, Yoongi and Hoseok.
You wanted nothing more for your special day than just a small gathering with a bit of alcohol and a lot of fun, just talking and playing Mario Kart all night long like you all did back in college.
“Open our present,” Hoseok insisted while hanging up his and his boyfriend’s coat and you wouldn’t let him tell you twice.
Opening the envelope Yoongi unlovingly pressed into your hands when he entered your eyes went wide, a small gasp escaping your lips.
“No way,” you were more than surprised as you were holding four tickets to your favorite musical, “how did you convince Yoongi to agree?”
Shrugging, Hoseok send you a mysterious smile, “I have my ways. I can’t wait to go, we wanted to go for such a long time.”
Hugging both of them tightly, you even managed to press a kiss to Yoongi’s cheek, “Who’s the fourth ticket for though?”
“Up to you, it’s a double date, you’ll find some guy,” Yoongi shrugged before a mischievious spark found its way into his eyes, “Maybe you can return the favor to a certain someone who nowadays risks his jobs to sneak extra dips into your order?”
“Wait, what did I miss?” Hoseok asked you with wide eyes before turning to his boyfriend, “Are you keeping important information from me?”
You shook your head, immediately disagreeing, “It’s nothing. Namjoon just gave me extra dips when I ordered a few days ago, it’s no big deal.”
“No big deal?” Hoseok gasped, in his head he was already planning your wedding, “That’s so romantic. He kept in mind that Antonio always did it for you and now he’s doing the same for you. I never knew Namjoon could be such a romantic dude.”
You let out a laugh, amused by Hoseok’s reaction, “It’s just dip, Hoseok. We’re not getting married.”
“They are texting though,” Yoongi added fuel to the fire, “She sent me screenshots. He even used emojis.”
The grin on Hoseok’s face was now manifested as you were slowly making your way to the living room where the music was coming from and the others were already playing drinking games, “He never once used emojis with me.”
“Young love must be so beautiful,” Yoongi teased you as he was letting himself fall down on his usual spot on the couch. Sometimes you wondered why out of all the people he was destined to be your best friend.
Knowing how nosy your friends are, all of them were immediately bombading you with questions.
“Who is in love?” Jeongguk’s eyes darted up from the cards he was holding on his hand, panic in his eyes visible. Surely, he thought it was about him and Taehyung – it was an open secret that they had a thing for each other.
“Soon, it won’t be me if this loser right here keeps on losing at this game,” Seokjin nagged his girlfriend, giving her thigh a small squeeze.
Before you could say anything, Norah joined the others, “I can’t believe you’re in love and didn’t tell me anything about it. Finally over Jaehyun, thank god.”
Ouch. While you were doing better day by day you still didn’t have to be reminded of the guy who ghosted you recently on your birthday.
“Guys, our little (y/n) will soon be off the market,” Hoseok announced happily, “She and Namjoon are going straight towards the dating stage.”
You facepalmed yourself, shaking your head, “That is an absolute lie, guys. Don’t believe anything Hoseok says. I am very single right now and will continue to be in the future.”
“Sure,” Yoongi scoffed, filling an empty glass with some liquor that was standing around, “As if Hoseok will let that happen. Once his mind is set it’s over for you anyways. That’s how he got me too.”
“It would be very nice if stopped talking about my love life for now,” you playfully warned them with killing glances, “It’s my birthday, you have to listen to me after all.”
Jeongguk raised his glass, gesturing for everyone to do the same, “To our beloved (y/n). May the new year of her life be filled with fun, love and more sex than the last one.”
“God knows she needs it,” Seokjin yelled as all of your glasses clinked and you were gulping down the bitter liquor in your cup.
The night went by much to your liking: Filled with laughter, reminicising old memories, one of them including that one time Yoongi yeeted a full water bottle against your temple, drinking and the feeling of being together, right where you belonged.
Of course, Hoseok out of all people brought up the brilliant idea to order some pizza – not going to lie, despite the ulterior motive Hoseok definitely had, it would not have been a normal night if you didn’t get pizza at one point.
You were sure that everytime your friends were over at your place you ordered pizza, it was the most normal thing but with Hoseok’s sheepish grin as he ordered you suddenly felt like it wasn’t the best idea.
Seeing Namjoon in combination of him bringing something as delicious as pizza was a birthday present in itself but you just had a bad feeling about Hoseok already plotting something you couldn’t see coming right now in the back of his mind.
The door bell rang around 10.45, the evening just getting started and you were unable to open it, due to you being entangled between Seokjin’s and Norah’s limbs in a heated game of Twister that you were not willing to lose.
“Ask him to come too after his shift is over,” you ordered Hoseok as he was jumping up from his space on the couch to open it for you, “It would be rude not to ask.”
Hoseok scoffed, shaking his head, “You really think I wouldn’t have done that anyway?”
Namjoon was rather surprised to see Hoseok open the door but he figured out that there was a small gathering going on as soon as he heard the screams from the living room – luckily he wasn’t around to see you sandwiched between your friends after Seokjin decided he had enough of you two and just let himself fall on top of you with his whole weight crushing you.
“I was already worried as to why (Y/N) ordered seven pizzas tonight,” Namjoon let out a laugh as he greeted Hoseok with a fast handshake.
Hoseok knew that he couldn’t be too obvious with Namjoon about his plans – he was sure that he could get it to work between the two of you but he knew his oldest friend, he might be smart but he also was the clumsiest guy on earth, especially when it came to girls.
He chuckled, “It’s her birthday today, we’re celebrating in a small round.”
Namjoon’s eyes widened, instantly feeling bad for not knowing that today was your special day, “You should’ve told me. I would’ve texted her about it earlier then. Now it’s almost too late.”
Hoseok nodded, a suspicious smile on his lips, “I would have if you wouldn’t have kept it a secret from me that you’re talking to her in the first place.”
He offered Hoseok a helpless smile, almost apologetic, “Sorry, I forgot to mention it. We’re not even really talking. She just orders pizza a lot and I got her number from the delivery note.”
“Sure, sure,” Hoseok answered, making sure Namjoon knew that he didn’t believe him a single word, “No need to make excuses. She’s cute, I’m not blind. When do you get off today?”
Checking his watch for a second he didn’t notice you coming around the corner, “In fifteen minutes. You’re my last delivery, just have to bring back the car after this.”
“You should come over after,” his voice made him look up, almost seeming surprised to see you at your own home, “You can’t say no, it’s my birthday.”
He broke into a smile, nodding instantly, “Happy birthday, (y/n). I’ll see you in twenty, alright?”
“Don’t let me wait too long,” you almost sing-sang as you took a few of the pizza cartons from his hand, turning your back to him and Hoseok again as you walked to the living room.
Namjoon let out a frustrated sigh after you were gone when he saw the teasing glance of his friend.
“You’re whipped already dude,” Hoseok let out a laugh as he took the other pizzas, “See you in a few minutes. Be fast, I’ll make sure that she’s drunk when you arrive. She gets even chattier when she’s under the influence. I can’t wait for my newest project.”
As he came back and all of you sat around your living room table, ready to eat and chat and taking a break of the games you were playing you felt excited. It was embarrassing and probably childish but the thought of Namjoon coming over later made you feel almost giggly.
When the doorbell rang again you were quick to get up and make sure you were the one opening it.
You were still pretty sober and a part of you wanted it to stay that way just so you could take in Namjoon sober, not influenced by anything else.
But as you opened the door, you instantly knew that you actually might need more alcohol tonight than ever before.
“Jay,” your voice was thin and you had to clear your throat in order for it to come back, “What are you doing here?”
Instead of Namjoon’s face you were greeted with his and not only did you not want to see him, you also didn’t want to be reminded of him at all.
“It’s your birthday and I know it was mean of me to –” he started to explain, flowers and chocolate in his hand but you had to interrupt him. You just had to stop him from talking before you could allow him to hurt you again.
You might play around with Yoongi and claim you’re falling in love with every second pretty face you meet but the truth is that you barely ever let anyone in and Jay once again was the living proof on why you should keep it that way.
You liked him, you truly did – you could see yourself with him, in a serious and loving relationship. Jay and you had good sex, you could easily have a serious conversation with him in one second and then almost die of laughter in the next, you talked every single day, he called you before going to bed and everything seemed perfect.
Until one day, it didn’t. It all went down really fast – first he didn’t call anymore, the next day he barely responded to your texts, a few days later he didn’t even talk to you at all anymore.
You remember calling him drunk one night and he actually picked up for once only to tell you that you needed to respect his opinion. And you wanted to – you were the last one to run after a guy but the way he ghosted you just seemed unfair to you.
“Stop it, please,” you let out a long sigh, eyelids closing as you were trying to control the anger building in your stomach, “You have to leave right now.”
But you knew Jay and his stubborn self, he wouldn’t leave easily, “You don’t have to invite me in but please let me explain.”
Rubbing your temple in distress you almost considered hearing him out, almost got weak for a second. But then you thought about all the times you cried your eyes out over him, you got drunk and ate like shit and didn’t take care of yourself anymore, you were so lovesick you even skipped your friends’ parties and on the worst days you didn’t even have the energy to answer their texts.
You were still hurting, still wondering about why you weren’t good enough and how he could leave so easily when you were having such a hard time to get over him but that didn’t mean you were weak.
Just because it still hurt didn’t mean you had to hear him out.
Wrinkles formed on Jaehyun’s forehead as he desperately tried to get your attention, “Give me one more chance.”
Luckily, the anger overpowered the sadness inside of you as you heard those words out of his mouth. For weeks you were longing to hear those words and go back to normal but that was no more.
“Are you completely insane?” your eyes widened furiously, your nails lightly pressing itself into the palm of your hands, “How dare you come here on my birthday and act like this? After all you’ve done.”
Jay nodded, his hand trying to get ahold of your shoulder to make you look at him but you didn’t let him touch you. “I know I sound insane but I can’t be without you.”
A scoff was all you could offer him as an answer, not believing that he had the balls to say stuff like that, “Go get some help, Jay.”
Before he could say anything, you heard Yoongi’s sarcastic chuckle from behind you, also not believing his eyes, “Everything okay (Y/N)?”
“Yoongi,” Jay almost sounded relieved to see him, “Help me out here. I’m trying to own up to my mistakes.”
Yoongi shook his head in disbelief. He didn’t seem to be as mad as you but he clearly was taking your side, “Dude, you have to let it go. You can’t just come here and make a scene.”
As if the situation at hand wasn’t bad enough, Hoseok came up from behind you at the same time Namjoon was walking to your door behind Jay.
With each passing second everything just seemed to become messier. Hoseok didn’t hate Jay, you were sure Hoseok was not even able to feel hate towards someone, but after all he did to you he certainly wasn’t very fond of him.
And what he disliked even more was someone putting stones in his way as he was trying to set you up with someone who he was sure would treat you way better than Jay ever could.
“Namjoon, thank god you’re here,” Hoseok’s voice sounded hopeful, “Jay, it’s time to leave. As you can see, you’re not needed anymore. Goodbye.”
Namjoon clearly was beyond perplexed as to what was going on – it was like he walked straight into a battlefield. He didn’t know you very well but you were clearly angry, the unfamiliar guy standing in the doorframe next to him the reason for it.
Putting one and one together fast, Namjoon understood what Hoseok meant.
“Hello,” with a fake smile, he greeted the stranger next to him, “I have no idea who you are but judging the glances (Y/N) is throwing you you’re not very welcomed.”
You were thankful that Namjoon came to your rescue – Jaehyun would not have shut up if Yoongi or Hoseok told him to but a complete new face telling him that he better should leave had an impact on him.
Stepping past him and inside Namjoon wrapped his arm around your shoulder as an obvious statement towards Jay and threw you a small, reassuring smile, “Happy birthday once again, should we go inside and have a nice evening now? Or do you still want to talk to him?”
You made a note in the back of your mind, making sure to thank Namjoon for saving you later. Who knows what the outcome would have been if he didn’t play along?
“No, let’s go,” you nodded as the four of you were turning around to leave Jay at the doorstep.
“(Y/N), you know I love you right?” you heard Jay yell after you as a last try to make you change your mind but Yoongi was quick to shut the door behind him, not having Jay’s shit anymore.
You came to a halt in your hall as Namjoon’s arm left your shoulder – you didn’t want to cry but you could feel your nose tingling and hot tears coming to you eyes as you heard him say those three words.
For a second you were unable to move, in complete shock and before you knew it, some of the tears were rolling down your face. It wasn’t like you were crying heavily, you just spilled some tears and you promised yourself right then and there that those tears would be last ones you ever cry for him.
“I’m sorry,” you managed to say with a shaking voice.
“Sorry for what?” Yoongi chuckled, wiping the tears out of your face, “For wasting so much time on a jerk like him? It’s okay, we forgive you.”
You let out a small laughter through the tears, followed by a deep breath before turning to Namjoon. What bugged you the most was that he had to witness all of that.
“Thank you for having my back there,” you told him and only saw Yoongi and Hoseok sneaking away in the corner of your eyes to once again leave you two to talk alone, “I feel a bit embarrassed to be honest.”
Namjoon shook his head reassuringly, his hand on your arm as an offer of comfort, “Nothing to be ashamed of. Whoever that guy was, and I am assuming he is or was more than a friend to you, he seemed like an asshole.”
“Was,” you informed him immediately, “Was more than a friend. The only thing he is, present tense, is just another regret of mine.”
Nodding, Namjoon looked into your eyes and offered you a smile, “Are you okay?”
“A bit hurt and agitated but more than ready to move on,” you answered him, the corners of your mouth turning into a smile.
“Good,” he chuckled before pulling you into a hug, “I didn’t get to properly congratulate you yet. You could’ve told me your birthday was coming up, now I had no time to think of a present for you.”
Waving him off, you were about to assure him that he didn’t need to get you anything at all but before you could he was already getting a small package out of his bag.
“I can’t believe you still got me something,” you lectured him but he shushed you immediately.
“Just take it and open it. It’s just something very small but I saw it at the gas station on my way here and just had to get it for you.”
You could feel your heart melting already as he gave you the present but when you opened it and realized what it was, you swear your heart was melting away like butter in the sun.
A genuine laugh bursted out from you, “A puzzle and a bottle of wine. You just gifted me a perfect evening.”
You hugged him once again, thanking him for the present. It might have been something small but the meaning behind it was big. It was thoughtful, clever, cute and actually useful. Maybe even your favorite present of the evening, right after Yoongi’s and Hoseok’s that is.
“I got the biggest one they had so if you need help with it you just have to text me,” his voice was nothing more than a mumble as he was still embracing you. Well played, Kim Namjoon.
“Oh, believe me, I will.”
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No matter how much you promised yourself not to let it get to you, Jay was not giving up. Calls, texts, flowers delivered to your door. He was putting in effort and even though you appreciated it, you told him more than once that you’ll not come back.
It’s been like this ever since your birthday five days ago. A part of you was curious as to what changed in his mind for him to go back and fight for you now but you knew as soon as you let him explain you would let him in again – and letting him in again was something you desperately wanted, and needed to avoid.
So, you fell down your hole again – it was exhausting and draining to act like everything was fine when you felt confused and hurt inside.
“Don’t cry too much, will you promise me?” Yoongi asked you from the other side of the phone.
You let out a sad chuckle, “I won’t promise. I’ll bawl my eyes out tonight. I’m in the mood for crying.”
Your best friend wasn’t very quiet about how much he hated seeing you like this. It was his way of showing you he cares. He checked in with you and told you you’re a helpless mess, trying to cheer you up in his own way, “Well, then you go and be a crybaby over a guy that doesn’t even deserve you. I tried.”
You laughed at his salty words, knowing he didn’t mean them, “Why am I even friends with you?”
“Been asking myself the same question for years,” he nagged you, “I have to go now. Stop sulking, get over that loser and then distract yourself with that cute delivery guy you always talk about. Bye.”
You haven’t seen Namjoon ever since your birthday but you were texting each other every now and then. Namjoon wasn’t stupid though, he knew you were having your own problems to deal with right now, not even trying to flirt with you as long as you were struggling.
There you were, sitting in your flat all alone, not knowing what to do with yourself. The most likely option was going to bed, crying your eyes out and craving for someone to hold you. That also was the most pathetic option but you stopped caring a long time ago.
Just as you were washing your face and brushing your teeth to get ready to go to bed, even though it wasn’t even that late yet, you heard the door bell ring, ignoring it. You weren’t expecting anyone and the possibility of Jay standing outside was way too high.
What you didn’t expect was another familiar voice yelling for you, “Delivery for (y/n). I know you’re home. Your light is on, idiot.”
You fastly walked over to the door and were surprised to see Namjoon in front of you, a pitying smile on his face. It was a terrible thought for him to see you like that.
By now you knew Namjoon well enough to know that he was the last one to judge you for going through a hard time but you still hated that he probably thought you were an emotional wreck (didn’t matter that he was very right with that).
“I didn’t order anything,” you said a bit startled, not knowing what was going on.
Shrugging, he handed you a paper bag, “I know but that’s the perk of being friends with a delivery guy. Surprise deliveries.”
You almost pouted because you were so touched by Namjoon taking care of you, “You really didn’t have to.”
A grin appeared on his face, the beautiful sight of his dimples making your chest hurt a bit. Namjoon seemed to be the perfect guy, right in front of you, but you couldn’t stop mourning over some idiot, “I wanted to. Plus, I missed you.”
What pissed you off the most was that you were doing better without Jay and then he had to show up and make you fall back to square one.
You smiled at Namjoon, a genuine smile, not one of the many fake ones you had to pull off over the last few days, “You’re too good to me.”
Namjoon would be willing to do almost anything to just get a genuine smile from you. He talked to Hoseok about it a few days ago and realized that his friend was right – for whatever reason, he was more than interested in the human form of a walking disaster that stood in front of him.
A part of him knew from the beginning but the more he got to know you, the more he got to appreciate your little quirks and flaws.
As you thanked him once again after a bit of small talk you let him go back to work and sat down on the bed to see what Namjoon brought you - your stomach was growling like crazy, you didn’t even realize how hungry you were. Thank god you have a Namjoon to take care of you.
The bag had a whole pot of ice-cream, two bottles of wine and a little note in it.
[ Cry it all out & cheer up soon. Until then, here’s some comfort in the form of food and alcohol for you. ]
Your stomach was tingling reading the little message – a small pout appeared on your lips, feeling both touched by Namjoon’s cute gesture and also miserable because you wanted to over Jay already.
Not only did you want to forget Jay, even more you wanted to completely fall in love with Namjoon. You wanted to experience what kissing him would be like and being held by him at night and also waking up next to him in the morning.
And with that mindset, you swallowed down your tears, shook any thought regarding Jay out of your mind and finally blocked his number. It was about time to do that. If only Yoongi was here to witness that moment, he sure would have been proud.
It was only 11.25 p.m. – you swore it felt like the middle of the night as you checked your phone, slightly annoyed.
But after turning around in your bed for several hours, you gave up on the idea of sleep. You weren’t even tired in the first place, you just wanted this miserable day to end.
If you couldn’t fall asleep you at least could waste your time with something more fun than staring at the ceiling and overthinking every single thing you have ever done in your life.
And oh, what a peaceful night this could’ve been, full of sleep and nice dreams – if only you didn’t decide to start the puzzle Namjoon gifted to you.
This man really bought the most complicated one he could’ve found, about seventy percent of it consisting of very dark to black pieces.
Puzzling was supposed to be a stress reliever but right then you just wanted to throw it against the nearest wall, not even nearly finished with the frame even after two hours.
Getting your phone out of your pocket, you opened your messages with Namjoon.
[ You: Kim Namjoon, I am goin to kill you fr. ]
[ Namjoon: OH? What did I do now? ]
[ You: This puzzle is making me go insane, you better get your ass over here and help me with it just like you promised. ]
[ Namjoon: Won’t let you tell me twice, give me twenty minutes and don’t be mad at me, we’ll finish this together ♥ ]
You had no idea what came over you, inviting Namjoon to spend some time with you alone wasn’t something you planned on doing this soon but the texts were sent before you could think about them twice.
A mixture of nervousness and excitement formed in the pit of your stomach, almost regretting inviting him over.
But not even an hour later all the nervousness vanished and was replaced with something you haven’t felt in a long time – genuine fun with a guy you liked.
“Are you blind?” you asked laughing, “You can’t just press a piece in if it doesn’t fit, that’s not how it works.”
Namjoon was laughing too now, rubbing his temple in pain, “Didn’t you say puzzling was fun and relaxing? This is one of the worst things I did in a long time.”
“I promise, it’s fun usually. You just happened to gift me the hardest puzzle to exist,” you teased him, loving how easy talking to Namjoon was. This was the first time you two were together alone and still there was no sign of it being awkward or uncomfortable.
The two of you were joking around, the TV playing in the background but both of you were too concentrated on the puzzle, and also each other to even pay attention to it.
“I’m hungry,” you almost sounded whiny as you were looking for a specific piece you swear you saw just a minute ago, “Let’s order something from Piero’s pizza.”
A small gasp came out of Namjoon’s mouth, “You actually like our pizza? I always thought you’re just ordering that often because you wanted to see me.”
“You’re confident I see,” as a small laughter escaped your lips as you shook your head, “But I have to dissapoint you. Piero’s pizza is the best pizza in town.”
“You have terrible taste,” Namjoon was clearly not agreeing with you, his eyebrows narrowed, “I knew even someone like you has to have a flaw.”
Laughing at his cheesy remark, you decided to still order from his workplace, no matter what he said - this was your house and in that house you love and support Piero’s pizza place.
It was around one in the morning when your and Namjoon’s heartfelt laughter while eating pizza and talking about just anything that came to your mind was interrupted by the loud and annoying sound of your doorbell. By now you were close to just turning it off so you wouldn’t have to deal with Jay’s attempts anymore.
Expecting the worst, you shook your head in disbelief and mumbled, “This guy really has some nerves, showing up in the middle of the night.”
Namjoon’s eyebrows knitted together, instantly understanding who was on the other side of the door. He felt a weird feeling of being uncomfortable rushing over him.
Not because he actually felt uncomfortable with you, no, he loved every second you spend together – the thought of you maybe giving in to Jay again after all was what caused the turmoil in his stomach.
He knew it wasn’t right to feel like this, some might even say he was jealous but he couldn’t help it. Of course, he himself was aware that the two of you were nowhere near being more than friends, you barely even were friends in the first place. Namjoon was sure that to you, he was nothing more than a friend of a friend and per chance also the delivery guy of your go-to pizza place.
But Namjoon wanted it to be more so bad – he could barely explain why he had this strong urge to make you like him, why he was so interested in you in the first place. It was like an instinct of his body to try to keep you as close as possible, as if something inside of him was screaming at him to make you his.
“Should I open it?” he suggested and you looked at him with curiousity in your eyes, “Maybe if he thinks you have a new guy he’ll stop bugging you.”
You considered his offer for a second but you knew Jay well enough – Jay was too stubborn to give up and also too clever to not see right through it.
Declining his offer you pressed your lips into a thin line, “That’s very nice of you but as long as you’re not opening the door with messy hair and in boxershorts I doubt he’ll buy it. It’s 1 A.M. and a boyfriend wouldn’t wear perfectly styled hair or nice tight jeans.”
Namjoon let out a laugh, agreeing with what you said – if he was more than a friend the two of you certainly wouldn’t be dressed and sitting on the couch while puzzling at this ungodly hour.
As the doorbell rang again, you took a deep breath before yelling towards the door, “Just a second.”
Just as you were about to get up and face the idiot on the other side of the door, Namjoon stopped you.
“Just how much does this guy bug you?” he asked you.
Rubbing your temple, you let out a sigh, “I wish he would just finally stop trying. I don’t know what else I should tell him to make him stop.”
“Got you,” he then said, getting up from the couch. You weren’t sure what to expect but it certainly was nowhere near what Namjoon had in mind.
“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” he almost sounded embarrassed, ears bright red as he pulled his hoodie over his head, a white basic shirt underneath it. Next he started to open his belt, making your eyes grew wide, “Please act like this never happened afterwards okay?”
Namjoon was stripping down his pants in front of you and it was hard to say which one of the two of you had redder cheeks. A part of you wanted to look away, the other one wanted to stare and save every second of it in the back of your mind for lonelier days. His thighs looked stone hard and your mind was filled with unholy things.
You couldn’t help but laugh lightly when his pants dropped down to the floor, in front of you a Namjoon only in boxershorts and a shirt, “I absolutely owe you one.”
He waved you off, shaking his head, “Don’t worry. I just wouldn’t have thought you’d see me only in my boxershorts tonight.”
As he was walking to the door and out of sight, the smile on your face grew wider and wider. The inappropiate thoughts rushing through your mind not helping the adrenaline in your body to calm down very soon.
You almost felt like a giddy teenager again who was about to experience her first kiss. Except for that you were an adult and you were nowhere near getting kissed - you were most likely just reading too much into the situation but you still allowed your mind to do so.
“Namjoon?” you heard a familiar voice, one that definitely was not Jaehyun’s from the door, sounding more than confused.
“Oh god,” you then heard Namjoon mumble under his breath, getting up fastly to see what kind of scenario was going down on your front door.
You were surprised with two pair of eyes, wide wide open, looking at you and Namjoon. The little smirk on Yoongi’s lips gave away that he was enjoying the awkward moment a bit too much and Hoseok’s laughter a few moments later made you let out a breathe you didn’t know you were holding.
“This is absolutely not what it looks like,” you promised, now standing next to Namjoon, “What are you even doing here?”
“We wanted to accompany your depressed ass,” Yoongi said with the widest gummy smile of him you’ve seen in a long time, “But I see you’re doing just fine without us.”
Namjoon closed his eyes in frustration, knowing exactly that the two of them will never let you live this moment down, “Why don’t you come in?”
Hoseok’s voice was higher than usual, a teasing tone in it, “You sure we’re not disturbing anything? We can leave you two lovebirds alone.”
Now also frustrated, you threw your head back, shaking your head, “Stop being a pain in the ass and come inside.”
So, there you were a few moments later, Yoongi and Hoseok sitting on your couch opposite of you and a still half naked Namjoon. It almost felt like your parents caught you with a boy in the house and now made you have the most awkward talk you probably could have.
Breaking the silence, Yoongi raised his eyebrow at you, “Glad you’re getting laid again.”
In an instant you threw him a warning glance, shushing him, “I’m going to kill you if you don’t shut the fuck up.”
“Why are you so tense about it?” Hoseok asked curious yet the smile never left his lips, “We were rooting for you anyways.”
“We weren’t having sex or anything like that,” Namjoon started to explain to his friends what happened. He told them that the two of you texted each other every now and then, about the food he brought you earlier, you asking him to come over, the two of you just puzzling and drinking wine up to the point where you thought Jaehyun was on the other side of the door.
“That’s all that happened,” you hold your hands up as if you were pleading not guilty, “No sex, no making out, not even holding hands.”
Your friends looked at each other, still with suspicious smiles and mischief in their eyes.
“What is there to smirk about now?” you almost whined, not wanting to discuss this awkward situation any longer.
As much as you loved your friends, you just wanted them to leave again. Namjoon and you were just getting to know each other and god knows how much teasing from these two he could take.
The evening was so much fun and you were sure that Namjoon and you could go into the direction you wanted to, if only your friends didn’t decide to cockblock you.
“Nothing, nothing,” Hoseok assured you, shrugging lightly, “But just so I got this right: The two of you were hanging out alone, in your apartment, late in the evening, drinking wine together, right?”
“That’s a date,” Yoongi finished what Hoseok was trying to say, “Maybe not an intentional one but surely you wouldn’t just do that with any other guy.”
Protesting, you pointed your finger at the couple in front of you, “You’re wrong. I would certainly love to spend a wine night with you alone. Or Hoseok.”
Hoseok let out a laugh, shaking his head, “But we’re both in a relationship. A homosexual one, that is.”
“Just saying,” Yoongi shrugged, already knowing that he was right, “You wouldn’t spend your evening like this with Jeongguk or Jimin. But with our Namjoon here things are different, right?”
You wanted to disagree, wanted to put him in his place and make him lose this argument. You wanted to discuss this with him until you swiped off that shit-eating grin of his face so bad. But you couldn’t.
Not a single good response came to your mind to disprove him and instead, you could feel the heat rising to your cheeks.
Hoseok let out an excited shriek of joy, nodding heavily, “You’re speechless! Speechless because Yoongi is right.”
“Guys, why don’t we just –” Namjoon started, trying to de-escalate the situation like the peacemaker he was but he had no choice, Hoseok interrupting him only a second after he opened his mouth.
“Don’t you even think we’ll be only picking on (Y/N),” he started, making himself more comfortable on the couch as a sign of him not planning to leave before he enjoyed every single moment of this situation, “Let’s talk about you then, Namjoon.”
“I’d rather not,” he mumbled under his breath before sighing. He knew just as good as you that once Hoseok started to tease, he won’t stop until he wanted to.
“We’ve known each other for so many years,” Hoseok was clearly enjoying this way too much, the amusement and sarcasm in his voice thick, “Yet not once have I seen you do something you’re not allowed to, just like taking a detour to deliver food to a girl’s house for example.”
“You’re cruel,” Namjoon stated in response, knowing there was nothing he could say.
Both of you were just enduring right then, hoping it won’t become awkward between you two after the others are gone again.
“I’m just saying it’s cute that the two of you are getting closer,” Hoseok pouted, acting like the angel he sometimes can be, “You look good together. You obviously are attracted to each other and you’re getting closer, we all know which direction this is going and I think that’s great. Our (Y/N) only had bad luck with guys but you’re a good guy, I know you’d treat her right because I’ve known you for years but have never seen you look at someone the way you look at her.”
Yoongi chuckled as his glance met yours, the expression on your face clearly begging him to set an end to this because if anyone can stop Hoseok it would be him.
“I think we caused enough trouble,” Yoongi told his boyfriend, taking his hand in his own before gesturing towards the floor with his head, “Let’s let them have their date in peace, what do you think?”
Hoseok’s bright and shining smile turned into a soft one as soon as he felt Yoongi’s hand on his, the excited idiot becoming the loving boyfriend he is around Yoongi immediately.
No matter how much you wanted to kill Hoseok, it always made your heart melt to see the two of them like this. Their behavior towards each other was so full of love, the vitamin and the grumpy old man in front of you were still as smitten for each other as they have been since the start. If you ever would feel like this towards someone, you surely won in life.
As he got up and walked towards the door he couldn’t help but tease his friend one last time, knowing very well himself just how much he annoyed the two of you, “Stay in boxershorts, I know our (Y/N), it’ll make her go crazy – she loves thighs.”
Namjoon let out a laugh in the same moment you threw a pillow towards him, Hoseok’s fast reflexes making him duck in an instant so the pillow didn’t hit him but the plant behind him.
“Out!” you yelled at your friend but a small chuckle still escaped from you – it was almost maniac, “You terrible human being.”
As soon as you heard the door close behind them shortly after, you felt your tense body finally relax again, letting yourself fall down on the couch behind you, your eyes fixated on the ceiling, “I’m so sorry you had to go through this.”
Namjoon didn’t seem to mind all that much. He mirrored your actions, allowing his back to rest against your couch, in the space right next to you.
You could feel him shrug beside you without having to look at him, his broad shoulders only slightly brushing yours as he did so, “They weren’t completely wrong.”
No, they really weren’t. Actually, they were spot on – at least with the things they said about you. You would even go as far as saying they might have opened your eyes a little bit more.
While you were aware before that you thought of Namjoon as someone rather attractive, someone you definitely could fall for at one time in your life you didn’t realize how fast you let him in already, despite only knowing him for a short time.
Every single word Yoongi said was true and you hated how well he knew you.
The anxiety you felt during the conversation with your friends was completely gone when you realized how relaxed Namjoon was beside you. You feared he would start to feel uncomfortable, maybe even want to leave because of it but there you were, both of you drained from Hoseok’s teasing but at least without a weird tension between the two of you.
Namjoon letting out a scoff made you divert your attention from the ceiling to the man beside you - it was near shocking to see how close he was lying next to you, his face only centimeters away from your own, “What’s so funny?”
His glance shifted towards you, a smile that one could describe as almost silly-looking on his face, “Seems like we’re having a date, huh?”
“Seems like we are,” immediately you started smiliing widely, nodding your head, “Without us even knowing.”
Namjoon started to move around to lay on his side, his head propped on one elbow so he could look at you better, his whole attention on you, “If I’d ask you out on a real date, would you say yes?”
“Well, that depends on what a date with Kim Namjoon involves,” you arched an eyebrow, the playful tone in your voice making you sound way more relaxed than you were actually feeling inside.No, you were not feeling calm or cool, you felt your stomach tingling and your heart beating. The side effects of being next to Namjoon.
“Definitely not Pizza from Piero’s,” he laughed, making you do the same.
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The annual campfire party of your friendgroup was the highlight of every year. It all started around four years ago when Hoseok first invited your group of friends to camp in his parents yard - back then you all were wondering why you should camp in a simple backyard but as soon as you first arrived you knew exactly why.
Not only did Hoseok’s parents have a massive yard, it also looked like the biggest cottagecore inspired movie scene you’ve ever seen with big, tall trees everywhere, wildflowers decorating the whole place and the coziest fireplace right next to an old shed, used to store tools and, once a year used for someone to make out in it while the rest of you were living your best camplife.
Ever since then you loved Hoseok’s campfire parties and this year you were even more excited because you had high hopes of ending up in Namjoon’s tent tonight.
“Turn left right there,” you navigated Namjoon who was kind enough to pick you up, “We’re almost there.”
“I know where Hoseok’s parents live, you don’t have to tell me,” Namjoon chuckled, clearly amused by your excitement, “How many people are coming?”
“Not that many,” you informed him, “Just the usual guys from our squad, their girlfriends and dates. No outsiders.”
“Leaves me wondering if I am part of the squad now or just your date,” he joked around.
Shrugging, you threw him a cheeky smile, “Depends on which one you prefer.”
He threw his head back while laughing, his dimple popping and you swore that you could never get enough of this view. By now you were whipped for Kim Namjoon and the two of you haven’t even kissed yet - it was almost scary to think how weak he could make you once you pass the flirting stage.
“I hope to be a bit of both,” he shyly admitted, making you smile instantly, “But you know, it takes two to be on a date. What do you think?”
“A date it is then,” you proudly said as he was parking the car.
As soon as you stepped out of the car you heard Jeongguk’s loud laugh alongside the music that was blasting from the backyard. Namjoon insisted on carrying not only his tent but also yours, being the stubborn gentleman he was.
“Oh, look who’s coming,” Hoseok annouced with his cup raised as he spotted the two of you, “Our two lovebirds.”
“Ay ay, such a pretty couple,” Jeongguk yelled and you wondered how he already managed to sound tipsy despite the evening just starting.
“You all have to shut your big mouthes,” you laughed as you approached your friends, all of them already sitting around the big fire in the middle on their camping stools, “Always making a big deal out of nothing.”
But once again they weren’t too wrong, were they? You noticed the way he sat down right next to you, a bit closer than he needed to be, the way he moved as soon as you moved, tense around each other, not because it was awkward but because both of you wanted to be ready for the other one.
It was already starting to get dark outside when finally everyone invited was there, everyone busy with something. A few people were setting up the tents, you and Seokjin's girlfriend were busy preparing some food while Namjoon and Yoongi tried to set up the big fire in the middle of the garden, tons of camping chairs gathered around it.
"So, how are things going between the two of you?" She asked you, not able to contain her big grin, "Are you still in denial about the fact that you're into each other?"
Throwing your head back, frustration was written all over your face, "I don't even know anymore. We're always flirting and like each other obviously but I think he doesn't want to pressure me because of the whole Jay dilemma."
"Well, I see how that can be frustrating but on the other hand that is very considerate of him, isn't it?" She had a point, you knew she does. He just wanted to be sure you're ready and you're comfortable but how in the world could you signal him that you were indeed more than ready?
As you stepped outside again, Namjoon was greeting you with a wide smile, gesturing you to sit down next to him. Jeongguk and Taehyung already had taped cans of beer to their hand and the music was playing loudly in the background as a few people of the group were talking about old memories from college.
Like every time, the atmosphere was cozy - the fire was keeping you warm and the stars were twinkling bright as you looked up. You loved those moments, they always made you feel peaceful. Seeing all of your dear ones together, having fun without a worry in the world warmed up your heart, you knew in the moment that you were making memories. Not to mention the special feeling of having someone next to you who you liked so much, he made your heart beat faster.
"Are you okay?" Namjoon whispered for only you to hear and you saw how for a second his hand was hovering just above your knee but he stopped himself - you wish he didn't, "You're unusually quiet."
Not thinking about it you put your hand on top of his, making his own hand rest on your thigh. It felt surprisingly easy and right to have it there, as if it belonged there.
Looking over to him, you leaned closer to reassure him, "I'm just enjoying the moment. It's nice to be here, with you."
He didn't have to say anything for you to know that he was feeling the same - the soft and calm smile was reassuring enough.
The party was in full swing when you decided to leave it for a bit, walking over to the part in the back of Hoseok’s garden, where everything was quiet, the only sounds coming from your friends that were playing games behind the tents but they were too far away for you to understand what they were talking about.
You didn’t have to turn around to know that the audible footsteps approaching you belonged to Namjoon; who else would come looking for you while there was a party going on only a few meters away?
He sat down beside you, his green oversized hoodie in combination with the grey beanie he was wearing were making him look so soft you wanted to bury your face in the soft fabric of the hoodie.
The dimpled smile he gave you even more managed to make your heart skip a beat and you were sure your knees would become weak if you weren’t sitting already.
“Is the party boring to you or why did you decide to flee?” he asked you, his legs crossed beside you as both of you were sitting a little bit too close to each other on Hoseok’s lawn, away from the middle of the party. For the first time in the evening it was just you and Namjoon, the rest of your friend hidden behind the many tents that were your home for the night. You wanted to be alone with him more than anything.
“No, that’s not it,” you reassured him as your eyes met and you almost felt shy, “I hoped for a certain someone to follow me so we could have some time to talk alone, away from all those drunk idiots.”
“Oh, should I tell Yoongi to come over then?” He joked, obviously knowing that you had no desire at all to talk to Yoongi right now – by now Namjoon knew that you enjoyed his company just as much as he enjoyed yours and even though you still were very careful about stepping out of the friendzone, you felt like you were slowly walking towards the dating-zone.
You playfully hit his chest as you laughed, “Don’t you dare to leave. I won’t let you.”
“What are you gonna do?” he scoffed, teasing you in the most playful way possible, “Run after me? Tackle me? You think you have a chance against me?”
“Probably not,” you agreed with him, “But I could always make you stay with a woman’s weapon.”
“Well, good for me that I didn’t plan on leaving again anyways,” he chuckled, the situation a tiny bit awkward because there you were – just you and Namjoon, all alone, alcohol in your veins and an obvious attraction towards each other.
By now it was safe to say that you liked Namjoon a little bit more than you would’ve expected but how couldn’t you fall for the pretty boy with a soft and kind heart?
You realized a while ago that Namjoon was the full package – he was funny and kind and cared about you, he checked in with you whenever you felt like shit and he even dealt with Hoseok’s constant bickering and teasing about the two of you. He helped you when Jay was bothering you, he listened to the small things you told him and remembered them, all in all he seemed to be the closest to a perfect human being you’ve ever met.
It was almost too good to be true but there he was, right beside you, eyes on you and you only.
“Can I sleep with you tonight?” you asked him a bit shy, knowing that you had to ask him sooner or later, “I’m actually afraid of the dark.”
“Are you sure that’s the reason why?” Namjoon chuckled, “Not because you want to share the night with me?”
You rolled your eyes, acting offended, “Don’t think too highly of yourself. If you’re acting like this I’m gonna go and sleep in Jeongguk’s tent again, let me just ask him real quick.”
As you tried to get up Namjoon wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you right back in with full power, making you fall into his arms. “Smooth,” you smiled up at him before daring to lay your head down in his lap.
“If you think I’m gonna let you sleep in Jeongguk’s tent you’re insane,” he chuckled as he was looking down to where you were laying, his hand carefully stroking your hair out of your face, “You’re not going anywhere.”
“I was hoping you’d say that,” you softly answer, a grin on your face. Of course, Namjoon was right  –  you wanted nothing more than to spend the night with him, god knows you wanted that since forever but you also weren’t lying when you said you were afraid of the dark.
“(Y/N)?”, Namjoon’s voice went quiet and he looked a bit worried, wrinkels appearing on his forehead, “Since we agreed that this is bascially a date I need to ask you a question.”
You just nodded, wondering what was heavy on his mind.
“This Jay guy,” he started and you felt your whole body tense up at the mention of his name, “Do you still have feelings for him?”
A sigh escaped your lips, meaning every word you were about to say, “Not at all. I don’t have feelings for any guy except maybe the cute delivery guy with the dimpled smile that always gives me an extra dip.”
Namjoon’s worried expression was washed away in a second, a laughter escaping his lips, “I sure hope you are not talking about Antonio.”
Both of you were laughing now as you were getting up from Namjoon’s lap again to sit beside him, your face facing his.
“I truly do like you (Y/N). I think I knew from the first time you opened the door, drunk and with mascara running down your face.”
You chuckled, nodding, “It’s not fair, you’ve seen me at my worst and I’ve only ever seen you at your best. Do you not have any bad days, Kim Namjoon?”
“Well, I was in a pretty bad mood when I thought you might go back to that jerk but besides that, I think I’m always close to perfect,” he teased you, his fingers busy with putting a stand of your hair behind your ear.
And there it was, the moment before. Both of you were thinking the same, your faces too close to each other and his hand on your cheek to obvious to deny it, and even if that wasn’t obvious enough, Namjoon’s glance down to your lips said it all.
It was the perfect moment, the weather was fine, Namjoon looked and smelled as good as ever, you were both a little tipsy with a full party going on in the back that you ditched – but all of those things didn’t even matter anymore as soon as you felt Namjoon’s lips on yours, the warm feeling of it rushing through your whole body.
His hand was holding the side of your neck, his fingers tangled in your hair as the soft kiss between the two of you felt addicting and you wouldn’t mind if this never ended.
It didn’t take long until your kiss turned into a full make out session, you on top of his lap as he held you close,
“Namjoon,” you softly interrupted him between the kisses but he didn’t care, he just wanted to kiss you for the next hour or two.
“Namjoon,” you once again interrupted him even though you didn’t want to, making him stop the kiss and rest his forehead against yours.
“Mhh?” he asked you with his eyes closed, enjoying the moment, “What’s wrong?”
“Hoseok and Yoongi are watching us.”
Only a second later you heard the two of them screaming and hollering, making Namjoon groan in frustration.
“Get the fuck away,” he yelled over to the tents where the two of them were standing, big grins on their faces, “You’re being the biggest cockblocks.”
“Excuse me?” Yoongi screamed, clearly amused, “If I remember it right we were the ones who set you up.”
“Good for you though!” Hoseok reassured you, “Use protection. You have thirty minutes before we start roasting marshmallows but I know Namjoon won’t need that long!”
Before Namjoon could say anything else the couple turned their back towards you, walking back to the party.
You snickered, “I don’t think they’ll ever let us live.”
Namjoon agreed as he realized you were still sitting on top of his lap, his hand found your thigh, drawing small circles in the inside of it.
“You’re so pretty,” he started kissing your cheek, “You’re pretty when you’re wearing a dress, make-up and with your hair all done,” another kiss on your jawline, “Pretty when you’re drunk and crying alone at home but still give me a smile when you open the door,” the next kiss right under your ear,  “Even pretty with a puzzle piece in your hair,”  a kiss right on your neck, making you shiver in anticipation, “And especially pretty when you’re sitting on top of me,” this time the kiss was planted on your collarbone.
“Just wait until you see me naked then,” you joked and held his head in your hands, kissing his lips softly.
Namjoon chuckled, his head in the crook of your neck, “I don’t think I’ll be able to survive that view.”
“I know CPR, don’t worry,” you joked and he gave you another kiss, happiness written all over your face, “Should we go back?”
“Wait a second,” he took your hand in his, “I just – I need to tell you that I do want to take you out on that date we talked about when we puzzled on your place that one night. And I want to take you on so many more. I’ll go to this musical with you and Yoongi and Hoseok even though I have no idea what it’s about and I want to kiss you so many more times.”
“I think all of that sounds just perfect, Joonie.”
Pressing a kiss to your hand, he took a deep breath before his eyes met yours, “Let me call you my girlfriend from now on, okay?”
The smile on your face grew wider than ever before, nodding instantly, “That sounds nice. Yoongi and Hoseok will be euphoric.”
Namjoon laughed, pulling you close to give you another kiss – it felt even better when you thought of him as your boyfriend.
“Somewhere between all the wine bottles and pizza boxes you stole my heart,” Namjoon’s voice was soft, “Let’s go tell them, I want everyone to know.”
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imagines-r-s · 4 years
Text
sticking it - j. farabee
chapter 6
a/n: now you’ll all see why i said be excited for ch. 6 lmao. (also, with ch. 5 not showing up in the tags for a minute, some might not have seen it, so i’ll link it here) but anyways, this chapter was difficult to write bc i’m not used to writing anything but angst lmao. and huge shoutout to my baby gracie for helping me out with this chapter. please enjoy and i’d love to hear feedback
also, like i told an anon, this is in memory of bee’s hair :((  (he still looks good with the new hair, don’t get me wrong)
taglist: @butgilinsky @barbienoturbby @sunsetholland​ @lovenhlboys @sortagaysortahigh @hockey-racing-fubol @oopsiedoopsie23 @iwantahockeyhimbo @dreamsndior
warnings: (2) your mom jokes, jealous!joel?, once again simp nation for the both of them, swearing (it’s a problem ngl), idiocy 
sticking it masterlist
wc: 4.1k
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(gif not mine)
When you told Marcus and Michelle that you had to be out for a month, they advised you to only come to the gym three times a week for two hours for the first two weeks and you’d figure out a plan for the two weeks after, that way you could take a much needed break out of the gym. The thing stressing you out the most was gym and they obviously realized it, so they were hopeful it would give you a chance to breathe. 
You planned to go to the gym Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays from 6-8am and then you would spend the rest of your day at home doing whatever you needed to do that day. The first Monday you spent those two hours doing ab workouts and helping the other girls around the gym, then you went home and stayed in your room for the rest of the day. You put your phone on do not disturb, so no one heard from you, which caused Kevin to come to your apartment to make sure you were okay. 
Tuesday played out the exact same way, early practice, then going home and staying in bed, and Kevin coming to make sure you were alright. Kevin even invited you to come out with him and some of the boys, which you politely declined saying they should have their time together. Wednesday, you simply stayed in bed, choosing to actually keep your phone on today, you were just tired and felt drained from everything going on right now that you couldn’t really muster up the energy to talk to anyone. 
Wednesday night, as you were rewatching Marvel movies, your phone started ringing with a call from Ryanne. Quickly answering it, “hey Ry.”
“Hey babes, how’re you doing?”
“I’ve been better, I’ve also been worse, so.”
“Me and Claude were wondering if you’d want to come over and hang out with us and Gav for some of the day, we’ll provide food and such, but we miss you, babe. So, we figured we’d ask while you have a chance.” 
In reality, Ryanne had heard from Claude that you wouldn’t be able to do extensive training for at least a month. She might not have known much about gymnastics, but she knew you well enough to know that you were always constantly training - she was well aware that if that ever got taken from Claude that he would be devastated if he was out for that long and with two weeks to prepare for a big game.
She had checked in to see how you were with Kevin one day after practice and when he mentioned everything that was going on, she was worried about you. She knew that she likely wouldn’t be able to help much, but she did know that there was one part of the equation she could help. Knowing that she already had a plan to have a send off party before the boys went on a roadie and also knowing that everyone on the team would be there, she somehow conveniently planned to invite you over a few hours before it started. 
“Oh, yeah, I’d love to, honestly. What time do you want me over?”
“Anytime after three is fine. I’ll see you then, hun. Oh, and wear something cute.”
“Why exactly?”
“Just do it,” Ryanne said, not having time to think of an excuse, “bye.”
As you were about to say something else, the ring that told you she had hung up rang out. 
…..
Joel wasn’t doing as good as he wanted to be recently and with an upcoming roadie, he knew he needed to spend more time on the ice before the game. Having asked a few of the guys to work with him during an unscheduled morning skate, he was able to work on what he needed to. 
“Wait, so she’s out how long?” Joel overheard Travis ask Kevin as he made his way into the locker room. 
“Like four weeks, but two weeks with the brace and basically no training, then two weeks with athletic tape on her knee and no hard landings. But she’ll only have two weeks before Championships, so she's not feeling too great about it. Plus, she has to use her brace and crutches again and she didn’t enjoy that the first time,” Kevin replied. 
“Is she going to be okay?” Joel hadn’t meant to ask his question aloud, but as soon as Kevin heard his voice a smile grew on his face. 
“Yeah, Lover Boy, she’ll be fine. She hasn’t really been up to do anything recently, but other than that I think she’ll be okay. She has to use her crutches again, which is honestly very entertaining,” Kevin stated before turning to leave the locker room, turning right as he got to the doorway, “random question, are you planning on going to G’s for the send off party tomorrow night?”
“Yeah, why?”
“Just wondering,” and with that Kevin was gone, leaving a confused Joel behind. 
Kevin knew that you had a lot on your plate right now and that you wouldn’t want to go to anyone about your problems. He also knew that the both you and Joel, were simply too stubborn to fix the problem going on between you on your own, hence why he had mentioned something to Ryanne. He knew that Ryanne would jump at the chance to be able to help you feel better and as soon as she mentioned the party set-up idea, he was in. The plan was then mentioned to most of the team, knowing that the help of many was needed in order to help the two idiots. 
….. 
After sending Kevin a quick text that you were leaving, you left your apartment and made your way to Ryanne and Claude’s house. Gently knocking on the door, you smiled when Ryanne opened the door, “awe, babe, I’m so happy you’re here, I missed you so much.”
“I missed you, too. Not to be rude, but where is the tiny human?” you asked, looking past Ryanne to see Gavin walking towards you, “hi, bub. Oh my god, you’re getting so big.” 
“Well if you came around more often, you’d get to see him more,” Ryanne mumbled, watching you play with the boy in front of you. 
“I heard that,” you said, in a sing-song voice.
“You were supposed to,” she replied, mocking your tone, “anyways, Claude is on his way back from the store, so he’ll be here soon, but I haven’t talked to you in forever, how’s everything? How’s gym?”
“Oh, well. I’ve been better, this last meet definitely wasn’t all that great and not being able to train doesn’t really help my case either, but I’m making the most of it,” you said, shrugging. 
“And you’re actually having to listen to Adrian this time around?” she said, pointedly, causing you to chuckle. 
“Yeah, I have to actually listen to Adrian this time,” you smiled, “I hate that I have to actually wear my knee brace, though. And I have to use crutches. Can you believe that?”
“Considering it’s you, I’m more shocked that you’re actually using them.” 
“Ry, shh, let’s not call me out too much today,” you replied. 
It wasn’t too long before you heard the front door open, Claude walking in a few seconds later, “awe, it’s my favorite babysitter. Come on, babe, let’s leave while we can.”
“Haha, I almost forgot how funny you are, G,” you said, sarcastically. 
“I’m sure, I’m sure. You know what would be nice though?”
“What?”
“Helping me put the groceries up,” he said, smiling sweetly causing you to groan. 
“Are chores and babysitting all I’m good for to you?”
“Well,” he looked up to the ceiling, as if he were thinking for another answer,”hm, nothing comes to mind, y/n/n.”
“Oh, that was mean,” Ryanne said, playfully elbowing Claude. 
“Thank-”
“She’ll never babysit again if we’re mean to her,” Ryanne smirked. 
“Oh, wow, I see how it is, don’t worry,” you said, the three of you laughing. 
As the three of you were setting out groceries - you mostly sitting on the kitchen island, taking things out of the bag - the three of you caught up. Claude talking about his hopes for these next few games, Ryanne talking about how Gavin was doing - not missing the few times Gav ran through the kitchen -, and you talking about whatever you could. 
“Ok, so we haven’t brought this up yet, but I was just wondering if you had any idea what’s going on with Beezer? I know you guys had gotten closer recently and he’s just not himself, so I’m asking if you know anything,” Claude asked, closing the fridge before turning back to you. Both him and Ryanne had a pretty good idea of what happened, but if they were missing something, they wanted to know. 
“Oh, um, well, about that one,” you sighed, gathering your thoughts, “me and him kinda haven’t talked since I told him I only wanted to be friends.” 
“Ok, but from the looks of it, it looked like both of you wanted to be more than friends?” 
“Yeah, but, there’s a lot more to it, you know.”
“No, actually, I’m a tad bit lost, y/n/n.”
“Look, I can’t have any distractions right now and I was worried about it affecting gymnastics, so I told him I only want to be friends.”
“That’s dumb,” Claude replied, quickly.
“Thank you, many people have mentioned that.”
“He has no place to talk in a situation like this,” Ryanne finally spoke up, causing you to look between the pair confused, “when his life was just hockey, hockey, and hockey, nothing could fill those spots. So, when our relationship was first starting he did the same thing to me that you’re doing to Bee.”
“This was supposed to be a philosophical moment and you messed it up,” Claude replied. 
“I didn’t mess it up, you’re just mad because you basically called yourself dumb. But pushing him away isn’t a smart option and it just hurts both of you in the process,” Ryanne said before walking back to where Gavin was. 
“Look, I know you said you didn’t want distractions, but this seems to be having a worse effect on you than you hoped. From the looks of it, when you started pushing him away, it affected your performance. Just pointing that out for you.”
“Yeah, I know. You didn’t have to point it out, you know.”
“Yeah, but you would have continued to ignore the obvious fact that you were just scared of a relationship in general,” he shrugged.
“I don’t even know how to talk to him about it or at least how to start the conversation.”
“Well, lucky for you,” he looked down to check his watch, “the guys are all coming over in like 10 minutes, so you’ll see him then.”
“Huh?”
“Yeah, it’s a send off party for the roadie this weekend, why do you think we got so many groceries?” and with that he left you in the kitchen by yourself. 
…..
Joel sat in the backseat of Kevin’s car, Nolan in the passenger seat, as they made their way to G’s house. By the time they got there, most of the guys had already gotten there, seeing a few familiar cars in the driveway, but one stood out in particular. He knew that it was yours from some of the times he had seen you driving, “what’s y/n/n doing here?”
Nolan and Kevin both chuckled at that, “she came over here earlier to watch Gavin, I think,” Kevin said. 
“Oh, cool,” Joel replied, attempting to sound nonchalant as possible 
“Don’t try to act like you’re not freaking out. You aren’t slick, dude,” Nolan added, shaking his head, “you two better talk, too. Because everyone is tired of the two of you being idiots and not talking shit out.” 
“We’re not idiots.”
“You are,” the other two said in unison. Joel didn’t try to argue as he followed the pair inside their captain’s house. 
As soon as he entered the house, he took note that almost all the team was here, most of the team was outside, but he immediately found you sitting on one of the barstools with Gavin sitting on your lap as you talked with Ryanne. “Go talk to her,” Nolan whispered, causing him to jump. 
“God, Pat. What the fuck?” Joel said turning around. 
“I said what I said. You’ll have to talk at some point, might as well just do it. Plus, she’s on crutches, so like, if she wants to run away it will take her a while.”
“Um, that’s- I mean, that’s valid, but-”
“At some point today, you should talk to her. I obviously can’t make you and it’s up to you, but I think it would help fix things,” Nolan said, shrugging.
“Yeah, I know, I know. I plan on it.” 
You and Ryanne had stayed inside with Gav since the boys were grilling outside, so when Nolan, Kevin, and Joel walked in, you were one of the first people to notice. Kevin made his way over to you almost as soon as he came in, “so, you enjoying the party?”
“Considering I didn’t know it was happening, sure I’m having a great time, Kev.”
“Well, I guess it’s a surprise party then,” you quickly shot him a glare, “surprise.” 
As you heard the back door open, you looked up to see Joel already looking at you, shooting you a quick smile as he followed his teammate to go outside. “I swear, if all you guys do tonight is spare glances at each other and don’t talk, I’m going to lose it,” Ryanne said from beside you. 
“I think everyone will, to be honest,” Kevin added, “well, I’m going outside. If you need any help, just let me know.” 
The boys had a few different plans in place to get the two of you to talk; conveniently sending Joel in to help while you were inside, telling Joel to go help out inside, asking Joel to get Gavin, and as a last resort, make Joel jealous. 
When everyone had been done eating, Claude asked some of the younger guys to help him clean up and bring out the cooler with drinks that was still inside. Joel had somehow conveniently avoided going inside while helping and when he did, he went straight to the kitchen and right back out. He wasn’t wanting to avoid you all night, but he didn’t know what to do. Shortly after, Claude had asked Joel to go in and get Gavin, somehow right as you had left Gavin with Ryanne, which also ruined that plan. 
Ryanne knew that it would be suspicious if they kept trying those same plans. So instead, she basically forced you to go outside with her. She helped you get outside, Kevin shooting up from his chair to help you get down the stairs of the deck, “you don’t have to help me out, Kev.”
“Knowing you, you would trip and break something. You’re already hurt enough,” he said, causing you to roll your eyes. As Kevin looked up, he didn’t miss the way Joel lit up as he saw you, “hey, your boy is looking over here.”
Looking up, your eyes once again met his, to which you sent him a light smile, “yeah, he’s been watching me since I stepped out here.”
“y/n/n, you would only know that if you were looking at him, too.”
“Yeah, I never said that I wasn’t though.” 
“You know, it’s obvious the two of you aren’t mad at each other or anything like that. So, why the fuck haven’t you talked yet?”
“Oh, um. Words are hard,” you said, walking away towards Travis and Nolan on your crutches. 
“You’re literally on crutches, you aren’t moving that fast.”
“You know who else isn’t moving that fast?”
“y/n. I swear, if this is another your-”
“Your mom,” you yelled back to him. 
“What is up with you and making your mom jokes?” Nolan asked as you got closer to them. 
“They’re funny?” 
“y/n/n just has the sense of humor of a middle school boy, that’s why her and Beezer got along so well,” Travis added, helping you move your crutches so you could sit down at the table they were at, “how are the crutches?”
“How’s your mom?” you laughed, causing the two of them to groan, “nah, they’re not fun. In any way shape or form.”
As you were talking to Nolan and Teeks, Kevin and Ryanne realized that none of the plans they had tried were working. Both of them knew that the only plan that would probably work was to make Joel jealous, so Kevin texted Carter, Morgan, Nolan, and Teeks to let them know that was the plan that they were going with. 
“y/n looks really good today,” Carter said, causing Joel to spit out his drink. 
“Better watch yourself, Hartsy,” Joel replied, shooting a glare towards his friend. 
“I was just being honest, she really does. There’s nothing going on between you guys anymore, right?” Carter watched as Joel visibly tensed at the mention of what was happening between the two of you, knowing that the plan was working he continued, “I mean, if nothings going on between you two, then she’s single, right?”
“Well, I mean-” Joel stuttered out, “we haven’t talked in a while, but that doesn’t mean-”
“I’ll be right back, okay?” Carter said, making his way over to the table you were at, causing Nolan and TK to chuckle as they saw Joel’s face drop, “hey, y/n/n.”
“Hey, Hartsy, it’s been a minute. How is everything?” you smiled. You kept talking to the group around you for a while, not noticing the way Joel was becoming visibly angry. He didn’t want to seem jealous, but he assumed that Carter had been flirting with you this whole time, so he made the executive decision to talk to you now. 
Since your back was facing him, you didn’t see him coming, but the three boys around you did, only trying to hide their smiles since the plan was actually working. “Hey y/n, can we talk?” he asked. 
You turned around to finally face the boy you had been avoiding, “yeah, hold on a sec.” As you continued some of your conversation, Joel was getting more and more irritated, mostly because Carter was sending looks his way that he couldn’t exactly read. Joel, being the impatient person he was, pulled the chair you were sitting at away from the table, pulling you up to stand before lifting you up over his shoulder, “Bee, what the fuck?”
He simply ignored you as he carried you up the stairs and back inside his captain’s house. You tried pushing yourself off as he made his way up the stairs, but it was deemed useless when he just tightened his grip, “Farabee, I swear to god. I will hurt you.”
Eventually, he opened the door to the guest bathroom and gently set you down on the counter before locking the door, “what the fuck was that for? If you want to talk, you could have just waited a second. But no, you had to be all dramatic about it,” you said, rolling your eyes. 
“Are you done?” Joel asked, crossing his arms and leaning back against the door.  
“I mean, yeah. Are you?” 
“Yeah, but I’m tired of us ignoring each other and I miss you, so we need to figure stuff out.”
“Awe, you miss me? That’s cute,” you smiled. 
“y/n/n, I swear, now is not the time for that one.”
“Ok, sorry. I’ll be serious now,” you said, crossing your arms to mock him. 
“I just want to know what happened at the lake?” 
“Oh, we’re going straight to the point, alright,” you sighed, “look, what I said at the lake wasn’t true. I got this idea in my head that if you were in my life, you were a distraction from what I wanted.”
“How’d that work out for you?” he said, smirking. 
“Oh, no, see that’s what we’re not going to do. No need for the attitude. Anyways, I had this idea that if anything happened between us, that I would mess it up and it would mess everything in my life up. So, pushing you away was the safest option.”
Joel took a moment to gather his thoughts before pushing himself off the door and made his way closer to you, ending up standing between your legs with his hands on either side of you, “look, I’m saying this and I mean it. I understand where you’re coming from with the fear of distractions thing, but I want you to know that I would never intentionally keep you from your goals and dreams. I’m just extra support, you know.”
“Yeah, I realized that after you ran from the lake house. We could have had this figured out by now, if you had stayed,” you said, sarcastically. Rolling your eyes for added dramatic effect. 
“Oh, shut up. You have no place to talk, babe,” he said, smiling when he heard you giggle, “what was that for?”
“I kinda missed you calling me babe, I guess. Kinda crazy, dude.”
“Awe, so you did miss me?”
“I never said I didn’t,” you said, quietly reaching up to wrap your arms around his neck. You saw the way that his eyes went from your eyes to your lips, “I also missed this,” and with that you pulled him closer until your lips met in a long awaited kiss. 
As the two of you broke away, your foreheads were still together, “hey, Bee?”
“Yeah?”
“You know who else I missed? Your mom,” you laughed. 
“Way to ruin the moment, babe,” he smiled, “That was funny though, so I respect it.”
“Dude, I’m so funny sometimes.”
“Looks aren’t everything, babe,” he said, laughing at the gasp you responded with. 
“Oh, that was rude. I’ll get you back one day though,” you watched as he went to leave the bathroom, “hey, Bee. I’m not supposed to walk without crutches, hate to break it to you.”
Rolling his eyes, he made his way back to you, turning around right in front of you, “here.” You leaned a little bit forward, wrapping your arms around his neck once again as he readjusted his grip on the back of your legs, so he could give you a piggyback ride on the way back outside. 
“You know, they didn’t tell me there was a party,” you spoke as he made his way back towards the door. 
“Oh, they said it was teammates only and then I saw your car,” he replied, pausing a moment as the two of you realized what had happened at the same time, “so, this was-”
“Yep.” 
“And Hartsy saying he was going to ask you out was part of it?”
“Hartsy said he was going to do that,” you started cackling. “Wait, were you jealous of him?” you asked laughing even harder. 
“It’s not funny.”
“Oh, yeah. I know, it’s hilarious.” 
“I will drop you right now,” he said, as he opened the door for outside, “and you’ll stuck right here, Ms. ‘I can’t walk down stairs right now’.”
“That’s a low blow,” you said, as the two of you made your way back to the table you were at. 
“Oops, sorry, babe,” he set you down close to your chair, but sat down before you could.
“Oh, so now you steal my chair, too?”
“Oh, shut up, you’re fine,” he said, pulling you to sit in his lap, “there you go.”
“So, I see the two of you made up?” Nolan asked, pointing at the two of you. 
“We also made out, in case you were wondering,” Joel replied, earning an elbow to the stomach, “ow, that hurt.”
“Sucks to suck, babe,” you replied, causing the smile on his face to grow even more. 
When Kevin and Ryanne watched the two of you walk back outside, they were happy to see that the plan worked. Ryanne simply laughed and shook her head as she heard the exchange between the two of you, “they are so in love and I don’t even think they realize it.”
“Ryanne, that is a big word, that I’m not prepared for. So, please, let’s not do that today,” Kevin replied, earning a laugh from Ryanne, “they’re happy though, that’s all that matters to me.”
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scottydog4-blog · 3 years
Text
Okay.
It’s been a day.
There are now a LOT of gifs and Twitter-pinions about the premier, and I have some too.
When I finished ‘More Joy’, I quite literally thought “I want them to go back to how it was”…. and I felt like a complete Sharpwin traitor. I actually wanted to box it all back up and have the old Max and Helen back, corridor walks and longing stares, all happening safely inside the walls of New Amsterdam hospital. And at the same time I wanted to rewatch the whole episode to see new Max and Helen again because they were (mostly) adorable.
Then I spent the day reflecting and the more I thought about what I didn’t like, the more I realised one thing. I didn’t like that they weren’t at the hospital. It felt so weird to see them at Helen’s place, half dressed and TALKING, openly. It was a bit too much for my over analytical, ready-to-pick-up-on-all-and-any-subtext brain. It was a change seeing them like that, and I don’t seem to like change. Which is hard because it seems season 4 is not only about joy, but about change.
Yes yes, the first scene was 🔥🔥🔥 endless gifs. In hindsight, I wish I’d never seen any previews but alas, I’m a spoiler junkie. It was awesome though.
The second scene was slightly dramatic and achieved its goal of throwing a nice cold-bucket-of-water on the moment 🥶🥶🥶
The third scene did feel a little out of left field because in Helen’s season finale London movie her mum was not very likeable and for most of Season 3 Mina was a pain in the ass, so wanting us to root for her to go hang out with both of them instead of her very warm and loving NA fam and her new hot boyfriend is a hard sell! But go read someone else’s analysis of that because a lot has been said about her past and her healing journey etc. I can accept it, it’ll just sting a bit (see hatred of change above).
I’m going for the next three scenes.
Scene four. I loved it because they were up and they were walking about and talking normally and I think them walking and talking is as much part of both of their characters as their longing looks. He’s followed her down endless hospital corridors, now around her apartment, and maybe soon across an ocean. And yes you can complain about the I love yous, or you might love how they happened. Whatever. All I saw was Max react to her saying ‘I love you’ as if finally, even to him, this was completely obvious. I mean, his face is like ‘duh’. It’s why he’s ready to fight so hard for her. He’s not second guessing that she loves him anymore. And that felt good to see.
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Scene five. I hated it. I still do. But I hate it because it makes me feel uneasy and uncomfortable, like it becomes painfully obvious that their long distance solution is not going to work and it’s awkward watching them realise it to. Which is the point. Because we all need to get that long distance is just not going to work. If they went down that route for an episode or two (or five) then that would mean Helen would be able to leave, and Max would stay, and that’s certainly not what we want. She’s one of our favourite doctors and she has amazing patient storylines and being Max’s long distance girlfriend is not just a down grade for Helen (and Freema), it’s insulting. What I think most viewers would have liked by the end of this scene is literally for Helen to give up on her London dream so everything goes back to being easy and we would get Max and Helen staying at New Amsterdam, same as they always have been, only now perfectly in love. Also an insult to woman everywhere. But you know who absolutely never tries to suggest that, who keeps making suggestion after suggestion, who literally declares different iterations of “it’s gunna work” every time she implies that it won’t. Max. He never asks her not to do this, only reassures her they’ll figure it all out. And that also felt good to see.
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Lastly, scene six. My absolute favourite (yes, above scene one). It makes complete sense now why the last scene on the roof is the most comfortable one to watch. Because it’s them. Max and Helen. Back at New Amsterdam. On their roof. Just existing next to each other. Clothed (lol). “Oh hi” never sounded so good after all the ups and downs during the episode. Glancing at each other as they chat in front of the NYC skyline. That feeling that everything had changed evaporated instantly. Change MAY be coming, but for now they are still here.
And when they do start to talk about them, it doesn’t feel so weird. In fact, this scene is literally pure JOY. How can you argue otherwise? Max, who admitted on the very same roof to the very same woman how he’d let his wife down because he couldn’t turn down his chance to climb ‘Everest’, is now willing to do the exact opposite and GIVE UP his Everest so Helen can climb hers. Because he loves her. Plus, LOOK AT FREEMA’S FACE. How does she do all those emotions like that? And then there’s Max, who just looks back at her like ‘of course I’ll follow you, you’re my joy silly.’
SO MUCH JOY ON THAT ROOF!!!
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People are only mad because they are freaking out about how the show creators are going to possibly make this work without them. And that in itself is just totally unnecessary.
New Amsterdam is a show about the Medical Director, Max Goodwin, and all his awesome staff. It’s about patients. It’s about shining a light on things and causes that matter. It’s about New York (see all those rooftop scenes, that skyline is the other character). People LOVE it just as it is. WE love it. Those things are the premise of the whole show. So can everyone CHILL. What they’ve done, is they’ve put that thing we love on the line and now we are all wanting to know how the hell they’re going to fix this mess. And they are going to say OVER and OVER that Max and Helen are DEFINITELY leaving because implying otherwise undermines the whole storyline. We need to feel they are leaving to be invested in whatever happens next. Time jump or mind changes or any number of things they might throw our way to get a back to the premise of the show. And we are going to tune in week after week to find out. And that my friends, is how television works. And thinking they were going to do otherwise was just setting yourself up for disappointment.
To the people demanding Max and Helen be happy for at least one episode… um, they looked very happy in episode 1 and they look very happy up against an ambulance in episode 2, and in the corridor smooching in episode 3, and wandering the streets of NYC some time in the future…
To the people who thought they were getting 5 full minutes of sexy times. I believe what we were told was we’d be ‘happy with the first 5 minutes’ (e.g. that glorious time before Helen said ‘I should never have…’)
To the people who read every single article and Q&A - Schulner LITERALLY said so many times that the season would be about discovering your joy and what happens after you get what you want. I think one time he even mentioned ‘chasing after’ it. We were basically warned and WE ARE LITERALLY LIVING THIS NOW TOO. We got Sharpwin, now we have to live with what happens next. Cause and effect in action.
To the people annoyed with all the drama this show has caused. It’s a… drama show. It was to be expected.
So let’s try to relax and enjoy the ride :)
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15-dogs · 4 years
Text
something like this |s.b.|
pairing: sirius black x reader
summary: sirius always seems to have something to say about your boyfriend, but maybe it’s because his words are powered by another emotion
warnings: light swearing
guide: (Y/N) = your name, italics = flashback
word count: 2229
a/n: hi hello I’m a HUGE new girl fan and I was rewatching some episodes the other night (specifically oregon s4e16) and then I had an urge to make a fic?? off of the episode?? so yeah that’s what I did lol I hope all of you like it!!
“Sorry,” Remus said as he placed a letter before you, “it’s not from him.”
You groaned and threw your head in your hands. You could feel everyone’s eyes on you― specifically Sirius― so you regained composure, meeting everyone’s sad eyes with a smile.
“It’s fine!” You shot a glare at Sirius who hid his smirk with a long sip from his mug. “Don’t start with me, Sirius.”
“I haven’t said a word, love.”
You rolled your eyes as you got up from the table. “He’s coming, I know he is.”
“I bet he’s just busy, (Y/N),” Peter assured you.
“Yeah, you’re right, Peter. He’s just busy.”
“Or maybe he just doesn’t make time for you,” Sirius interjected.
You rounded on the raven haired boy, finger pointed at his chest. “I thought I said not to start with me,” you sneered.
Sirius raised his hands in defense, standing up so he towered over you. “I’m just saying, Ben’s your boyfriend, he should be spending his summer with you here. Or at least he should write you. When did he say he was visiting us? Four days ago, was it?”
You scuffed your feet against the wooden paneling of the little home you shared with the three boys. You suddenly felt ashamed; you didn’t want to admit that Sirius had a point, but he most certainly did. Ben hadn’t bothered to contact you since you moved in. When you two went long distance, Ben had promised he’d at least stay for a bit to help you unpack but there you were, living in your new flat with Remus, Sirius, and Peter for a couple weeks now, nearly fully unpacked and ready to move on. But you weren’t ready to move on from Ben.
And then you were back under Sirius’s gaze, his eyes softening as your shoulders drooped. “Six days ago. He said he was coming six days ago.”
Sirius cursed himself for falling prey to your doe eyes. He grabbed you by the arms, ducking to meet your gaze. “Hey, look, I’m sorry I brought it up.”
“No, no, it’s fine.” You wiggled out of his grasp and waved him off as you stalked towards your room. “It’s...it’s really fine, Sirius.��
He ran his hand through his hair in distraught. “Shit, no-”
“It’s fine, Sirius, it’s fine.”
As you disappeared into your room and shut the door behind you, Remus clapped Sirius on the back. “So smooth, Pads. Really, I think she might have fallen in love with you already.”
Sirius shrugged out of Remus’s hand and stormed off towards his room, leaving Remus and Peter stifling snickers behind him.
Sirius flopped onto his bed, throwing his head back onto the pillow. He groaned at his actions, recalling what happened months prior, before you got together with Ben.
“Listen, I can’t just kiss you like this!” Sirius cried. A cocky grin tugged at your lips. Sirius’ eyes went wide and he shook his head fervently.
“What does that mean?”
“N-nothing.”
Sirius Black was nervous. And it was all because of you.
He started to stammer our poor excuses before promptly shutting himself up and darting off towards his dorm. You called after him, feeling terrible for making fun of him during the little drinking game. Something about the way he looked at you made you feel like he wasn’t joking when he said he didn’t want to kiss you like that, but still wanted to kiss you.
And Sirius wanted to. He wanted to since he met you but you were too blind to see it.
You paced around the kitchen, awaiting an owl from Ben. Remus almost felt sorry for you, watching you pause every few minutes because you thought you heard a hoot or a flap of wings.
But for the hundredth time that day, you paused at the sound of wings. And so did Remus.
You ran to the window to catch the owl, seeing that it was Ben’s tawny. You squealed with excitement as Sirius exited his room. He felt instantly filled with regret as he saw you petting the owl, bouncing up and down.
“Sirius, look! I told you he’d write, I told you!”
Sirius ran a hand through his hair and feigned happiness. “Well, you proved me wrong, (Y/N).”
“What does it say?” Remus interjected.
You ripped open the letter, your eyes scanning over the sweet words that your boyfriend wrote you. You read it once, twice, three times, your face falling with each individual read. Sirius furrowed his brow and placed a hand on your shoulder. You gasped at his touch and looked up at him, tears in your eyes.
You let out a watery chuckle and forced a smile on your face. “Ben’s not coming,” you explained. “Too busy. He says that we’re probably already unpacked so it wouldn’t make sense for him to buy a Portkey and travel from America and whatnot, so…”
“What?” Sirius looked appalled. “You’re joking.”
“I guess you could say I can’t be Sirius.” Even Sirius couldn’t laugh at your joke. You shifted your weight and looked at the floor. “Go on, Sirius, tell me how shitty of a person Ben is. I know that you’re dying to.”
Sirius sighed, looking over your shoulder to meet Remus’ knowing eyes. Remus shrugged as if to tell Sirius that whatever he would say he had to mean because you could see right through him.
“Listen, you’re probably right. He’s just busy.”
You nodded, feeling the tears start to stream down your cheeks. “I’m gonna go to my room.”
“Wait, (Y/N)!”
You dropped the letter at Sirius’s feet as you ran towards your room and shut the door behind you, collapsing on your bed in a ball of sorrows.
Sirius picked up the letter and read it once over, scoffing at his poor excuse of an apology. Remus stared at his friend amusedly, sipping coffee from a mug. Sirius slammed the paper on their table, rolling his eyes.
“I can’t believe he would do that!” Sirius hissed.
“You can’t? Because I most certainly can.”
“She deserves someone who actually cares about her, someone who wants to be with her, someone-”
“Like you, Sirius? She deserves someone like you?”
Sirius froze. Remus raised his brows awaiting Sirius’s response, but nothing came. That was as much an answer as any.
You had been crying in your room for the past couple days. Remus would occasionally bring you chocolates, Peter crafted little toys like fortune tellers, and Sirius? Sirius hadn’t shown up so much.
He would check in on you, sure, but he never brought you anything like the other guys. You weren’t necessarily upset about it, but you were confused as to why he seemed to be more distant than the other guys. Not avoiding you, just distant.
Maybe he wasn’t good at comforting people. But you knew that wasn’t true, Sirius had always been with you, always been there for you. What would have caused this change in behavior?
As if he could sense your thinking, there was a hesitant knock at your door.
“Come in,” you called out as you brushed used tissues onto your end table. Sirius entered, waving at you awkwardly.
“Can I sit here?” He pointed towards the blank spot on your bedsheets.
“I cleaned it off just for you.”
“How thoughtful.”
You tugged the blankets up to your chest as Sirius laid beside you. You continued to stare at the ceiling, feeling Sirius’s stare on you. You sighed; nothing good was about to come out of that boy’s mouth.
“Say what you’re gonna say, Sirius,” you whispered. “I know you didn’t come here to just check on me. Just spit it out-”
“Okay! Fine! I will!” You were taken aback by his abrupt change in demeanor. “You need a guy who shows up, love, and Ben is not doing that!”
You sat up and rolled your eyes. “Say what you really feel,” you shot under your breath.
“When are you going to see that you’re stuck dating a wall, (Y/N)? You have to know that you’re too good for him!”
“Oh, but I’m not too good for you? In fact, I must be just perfect for you!”
You weren’t exactly sure where those words came from, they just came. Maybe it was that drunken night he was dared to kiss you and you hadn’t stopped thinking about it. Maybe it was the way he acted more like a boyfriend than your own boyfriend had. Or maybe it was the way he gave you butterflies when he smiled. Maybe it was the way electricity shot up your spine he rested his hand on the small of your back. Maybe it was the way that you wished you never dated Ben in the first place, but rather dated Sirius but you were too damn stubborn to admit it, even to yourself.
“What are you on about?”
You rolled out of the bed and opened the door, hearing Remus and Peter scatter back to their rooms. “Leave.”
“But, I-”
“Please.” 
You choked back a sob and Sirius then knew that he went too far. He got off of your bed and stumbled towards the door, pausing to look at you.
“I’m sorry-”
“I can’t help that I’m a hopeless romantic, Sirius. I want things to work out, and they will.”
“You’re wasting it on the wrong guy.”
You sucked in a sharp breath, mumbling an excuse as you shut the door in his face.
But, Merlin, was he right.
A week later, Sirius sat out by the pond that stood about 100 feet from your flat. He tossed a pebble in between his hands, debating what he could do to make it up to you.
Little did he know you were on your way to join him.
“Hey, Sirius.”
His eyes snapped up to yours and he began to grab his things to leave. “I was just heading out, actually-”
“We really need to talk.”
His heart sank into his stomach as his steps slowed to a stop. You picked up a rock and skipped it across the pond. 
“I broke up with Ben, actually. You were right.”
Sirius tried to fight the feeling of excitement that rose up in his chest. “How did he take it?”
You nodded thoughtfully. “Really well, actually.”
“He didn’t respond yet?”
“No, he hasn’t responded.”
You let out a wry laugh and Sirius joined in, feeling some of the tension flood from his body. You picked up another rock and skipped it across the pond.
“Is it bad that I’m relieved?” you said, interrupting the silence. Sirius’ eyes went wide. You met his stare and he quickly attempted to save face by clearing his throat and picking up another pebble.
“I don’t think so. I think that you did the right thing.”
“I had a feeling you’d say that.”
That sense of dread crept back into the forefront of Sirius’s mind as you picked up yet another rock. 
“You know,” you began as you moved closer to Sirius, “my friends back home would always play this game; there was a little pond by our houses that we’d go to on weekends. We’d talk about whatever, but it was usually boys. So we developed a little tradition: you think of your crush’s name and you toss a rock across the pond. Depending on how many times it skips, your fortune with your crush would be told.”
Sirius eyed you skeptically. “Has it ever worked?”
“Merlin, no,” you chuckled. “But I’d still like to do it.”
He nodded dutifully as the both of you retrieved your rocks. You glanced up at Sirius, thinking of his name as you skipped it across the pond. It skipped two times before sinking, causing you to frown.
“What’s that mean?” Sirius asked.
“It means it’s not up to me anymore.”
Sirius snorted. “And you made these rules when you were a kid? That’s quite depressing.”
“Oh, shut up. Just skip yours.”
Sirius did as he was told, skipping the rock across the pond three times. You gasped before turning to him with a gentle smile.
“Three times? What’s that?”
“It means they fancy you back.”
He was thinking of you, who else would he be thinking of? But he couldn’t tell you that just because of some silly game you made up when you were a kid. There was no way you felt the same― you just got out a relationship!
Sirius smiled back at you, nodding with faint confidence. You nodded back and made your way to leave but Sirius wouldn’t let you.
The moment he had admitted that he wanted to kiss you back in school stirred in his mind like nothing else he knew. He thought about you constantly but he had to hide it. That was, until, that very moment. He couldn’t keep waiting.
“Listen, I can’t just kiss you like this!”
He grabbed you by the wrist and tugged you towards him, connecting your lips. You didn’t even hesitate to clasp your hands behind his neck, his own trailing over your body like a dying man to the prospect of life.
As you pulled away, both of you were panting messes. He rested his forehead against yours, placing a peck against your lips again.
“I meant something like that.”
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