#this is mostly for my reference for when i summarise

[loki-zen]

what i feel like people on here don't get when i wind up in these arguments is that I really am seeking out LLM tools - mostly the ones my coworkers are excited about - and testing them out. And when I actually examine their output in detail* they disappoint every single time. I think I'm actually remarkably charitable about people's claims that they're getting good and useful results given the amount of times this has happened.

* "in detail" meaning that I did one or more of the following:

Genuinely considered what I would have learned from this informative-writing-shaped object if I didn't know anything about the subject (a skill honed as a creator and editor of writing designed to inform the public about complex subjects)

Checked to see if its citations went to real publications, and if so, whether they were used in a way that would lead me to conclude that the writer has actually read the thing they're citing (the best I've ever seen an AI do on this was something I'd generously call a 90% hit rate on literal, is-this-the-right-article and-does-it-contain-that-claim accuracy - however, this was a product advertised as being for summarising research articles, and every single reference it made was to something from the abstract of the article in question!)

Where the LLM task was to describe or summarise a piece of writing, actually opened that piece of writing to compare it to the summary

Checked whether the tone/structure of the output was appropriate to its context - for instance, when asked to summarise a number of specific research papers on a given topic, does it sound like it's instead giving a broad overview of the topic?

Checked whether the grammatical and semantic elements actually pair up. For instance, if it starts a sentence with "however", does the content of that sentence in some way contradict, contrast or recontextualise the contents of the previous sentence? If it says that x or y "highlights" or "further demonstrates" z - does it?

Checked its implications. If it says that "these findings suggest a need to begin incorporating considerations of X into our models of Y, in contrast to traditional Q-based models", is that a reasonable thing to say or have our models of Y actually been largely X-based for fifteen years now?

In many cases, IMO - actually read the output! Like actually read each word and each sentence, attempting to construct meaning from the sequence of characters displayed upon the screen

To me these seem incredibly basic, and yet every single time it turns out that I'm the first one to examine it in this much detail before raving to my colleagues about how great it is. I feel like I'm being gaslit.

[ecoustsaintmein]

Poolverine thoughts

So I've just returned from watching Deadpool and Wolverine for like...the 8th? 9th time now? And I have thoughts about how the filmmakers chose to portray the evolution of their relationship -- some of them may already have been pointed out by others on this site, but this is my attempt to summarise them!

Also mostly I'm putting myself in Logan's shoes and writing this from his perspective?

Spoilers below cut:

We know that Wade has always made comments about Logan, even from the first film eg 'whose balls do I have to fondle to get this movie made?'. He might sound like he hates the guy, but obviously there's respect there, and he showed it in a Wade way. We know that by the third film, Wade wants to matter. He wants to be an Avenger, and almost regretted that even the X-Men didn't even want him. He prooobably almost nearly gagged when he spoke in earnest about how Logan has always been viewed as the X-Man in his world, but the respect is there. (And perhaps that's why he doesn't 'hit on' Logan as much as compared to Cable, Colossus et al? And all the 'shippy' comments were made by other characters in the film eg: bartender 'are you gonna fuck or fight?' or Cassandra's 'you two are cute'?)

The song choices when Logan and Wade interact, from AC/DC's Hell's Bells when they fight for the first time (fair, because Logan doesn't know Wade that well yet), to Avril Lavigne's I'm With You ('Take me by the hand, take me somewhere new/I don't know who you are but I, I'm with you') when they're driving in the Odyssey, which again, quite apt? And 'also the line 'take me home' in the Avril Lavigne song, which probably reflects Logan not really knowing who Wade is but just -- going along with the ride, as if asking Wade, just take me home, find me a place for me to belong. The theme of home recurs again and again, which leads one to wonder why it's not so surprising that Logan did end up following Wade home in the end???' Plus, 'You're the one that I want' when they're having that heavy makeout sesh intimate fight scene in the Honda? Let's not even talk about the 'Like a Prayer' scene, which again. 'When you call my name, and it feels like home.' Again. Home.

Which then leads to Logan, who confessed to Cassandra that he 'turned away' when 'they called for him', and he didn't make that mistake again when Wade called out his name at the end. While Aretha Franklin's 'You're All I Need to Get By' plays in the background. Yep.

Let's not forget the fact that Logan, after the fight in the Odyssey (despite all the boohooing and ongoing alcoholic misery afterwards), picked up the photograph of Wade's 'world', and returned it to Wade. Man doesn't want to show or say it during the second and third act but he CARES. A LOT!

Logan repeating Wade's words, verbatim, twice! ('You didn't lie, you made an educated wish'), and 'I'm an X-Men. I'm the X-Men')

Logan telling Wade that he wished Wade would die alone, then ending up making sure that Wade wouldn't have to die alone.

Logan keeping the suit on him at all times, only to have it get destroyed at the climax of the film - which, sad, because yes it's the only thing that reminds him of the X-Men of his world, but it could also be an analogy of -- he needs to move on. And he did! He wanted to be free, and he told this as much to Cassandra, and he did become free, in the end!

On the subject of Cassandra, she promised Logan that she could 'silence everything'. The joke's on her, because Logan found himself trading peace (as silence), for peace (as a chaotic, loud motormouth). He found his home, and it's with Wade.

On the subject of peace and home -- Logan is pretty much an immortal being, and a lot of his issues may have stemmed from the trauma of losing people he cares about, or people who got close to him, even for like 5 seconds (evidenced by ALL THE X-MEN MOVIES). He carried that with him throughout this movie, with all the references of saving the world, saving Wade's world, getting home, etc etc -- the point being, he did it for Wade, in the end (never mind Wade's educated wish that the TVA would restore Logan's past). And despite doing it for Wade, Logan was rewarded by having Wade AND Laura in his life now; both pretty much people who can't die, as part of his family. At least he will always have them -- and isn't that freeing and peaceful enough???

Last but not least -- as a circular thing, I'm going back to my first point. Wade spent the whole movie wanted to matter. In the end, he finds out that he does matter -- not just to his 'old world', but also to Logan. And be it just mutual respect, which then blooms into friendship, fondness, maybe more -- the point is: Wade does matter. To Logan. A character he spent the previous two films talking about despite not featuring at all in those movies. How do I know this you ask? Yes, Logan wanted to sacrifice himself for Wade. But more importantly, he followed Wade home. And at the end, after multiple groans, and frowns, and curses, he SMILED! AND LAUGHED! At Wade's stupid jokes!

I'm probably reading too much into their relationship and how they were written, and maybe it wasn't even Ryan's intention, but goddamn Hugh and Ryan made their chemistry/friendship bleed onto the screen, no matter how they were initially written in the script.

[divorceblogger]

hey love of my life, you've read dune right? can u explain the kwistaz haderach scheme like im 10 years old

I willll <3 people aren’t wrong when they say that the ‘kwisatz haderach’ is just a very, very special boy that a white guy was writing about in his silly sci-fi book before he decided to write more seriously about the dangers of imperialism and colonialism in the subsequent sequels. but really, the kwisatz haderach’s most narratively important role in the story is as the messiah-ruler figure of a despotic, genocidal empire; and he’s still a victim of the story he creates, a helpless product of his bloodline’s imperial ambitions and generations of political scheming.

where the definition of kwisatz haderach gets more complicated is when you start to pay more attention to the worldbuilding side of things apart from just looking at the role he plays in the larger story.

in the books, the bene gesserit essentially begin a breeding program to develop a biological product who’s supposed to have superhuman capabilities - capable of training in the bene gesserit way & developing the ability to peer into ‘male avenues’ which are beyond a bene gesserit’s ability - as well as ‘female avenues’ (which the bene gesserit are restricted to). the ‘female avenues’ referred to here are probably mostly in reference to the inherited biological memory of the past, and the reverend mothers (who inherit the memories of previous reverend mothers) probably possess the most heightened state of a bene gesserit’s powers. I suspect the male avenues refer to the ability to peer into the future although it’s never clarified - but to summarise, a kwisatz haderach is supposed to have mental powers that enable him to explore time, access the past and sort through different possible futures which can enable him to shape/choose what form it takes (dune messiah deals with the tragic consequences of losing your free will and expands more on the concept). spice and its various forms are the drugs which enable bene gesserit to train and develop these powers. the significance of the kwisatz haderach to the fremen is more complicated, although you probably already understood what was happening there - the bene gesserit plant ‘prophecies’ and superstitions through its branch of the missionaria protectiva to develop a mythology and faith that a trained bene gesserit - ideally the mother of the kwisatz haderach - can exploit to her advantage to protect the product of several centuries of breeding in case the necessity arises. and jessica and paul do actually exploit the fremen to their advantage in the books and the movies, if more explicitly in the latter.

the movie obviously simplifies this concept more to its benefit. the bene gesserit, with their own political agendas, vaguely describe the kwisatz haderach as someone capable of leading the universe into a better future, which sounds too good to be true for a reason. jessica tells paul that the bene gesserit tried to develop a mind capable of bridging space and time and those are words also used in the book - the movie just does away with most of the weird, inane gender stuff.

[moutones]

(yet another) new traffic series idea!

disclaimer: non-explicit nsfw references below

i realised that my griscott idea follows the same theme/premise as my limlife gritho from the other week, aka sex with feelings (about other people currently not in the bed) and now i'm thinking hey… maybe i'll turn this into a one-shot series?!

so! one fic for each life season starting with third life, focusing on the progression of desertduo's relationship. they'll each be written through the perspective of the person that's not-grian, so we get the outsiders' lens (though for third life i think i’ll write scar pov).

more under the cut!

initially, i thought it would be fun for them each to be smut-shots. one of my favourite things to read is smut doubling as character study (or the reverse, if you will), and i wanna try my hand at it. buttt i think some actually work better in my head as not-smut which is just as fun!!

these are my plans so far:

3rd life

scar pov

probably no explicit smut but some seemingly mundane but melancholic and sentimental scene?

you know, the whole complicated shebang of how desertduo came to be and manipulations and playing alongs but through it all, a genuine bond only deepening

this is all about showing how deeply the seeds for their Thing are sown

last life

smut - mumbo pov

i like the idea that there are romantic feelings between grumbo here, also because i am really loving mumscarian by extension

so grian has a crisis sometime early in because well, the end of 3rd life is hard to process when it involves killing one of the men you love and then you're thrown into another death game

grian teaming up with mumbo is very much a thing of comfort for him (in the beginning), so he spills his heart out one night and they basically have sad comfort sex

important: grian cries while they have sex

but it's ok! mumbo is here! and hes a little terrified because he doesn't fully grasp grian's feelings for scar's (no one does) but he talks grian through some things and then takes care of him

note: mumbo fully accepts grian’s whatever situation; he and grian have a stable relationship so there are no dramas with jealousy etc. especially as mumbo is also familiar with scar

oh boy this ended up being more elaborate than i planned

double life

smut - scott pov

as summarised in prev. linked post

re: no romantic or even sentimental feelings, just fwb - they’re both using each other to release general and sexual frustration

it could be fun if scar and pearl decide to stand in powder snow happen while this is happening - adding to the dissonant mix of emotions

undecided whether the sexual arousal will also be shared between soulmates here…

limited life

smut - etho pov

as summarised in prev. linked post

i think this one will have some important contrasts to the scott fic - while that one occurs towards the beginning of its respective season, this one is near the end. while griscott chat during sex, gritho are mostly silent

i want to highlight how grim everything kind of feels; the desperation of holding onto someone when you know the end is coming soon

secret life

now i'm not so sure about this one... it could be interesting to make it a solo grian pov? as he was alone for most of this season and i don't feel like writing him with etho again or cleo, maybe this could be a masturbation fic. idk!

or you know, it could be really interesting to write him with joel... there's that episode where they essentially become soul bound. i think their bond through the seasons is also very interesting. my brain is whirring

but i DO at least know that there will be reflections and thinkings of the good and bad times with scar. not so much crushing yearning or desperation or mourning like the previous fics, but something like the way to healing...

wild life

the healing arc be upon us!! i did write my first scarian fic RIGHT before the episode of them teaming up released so that was a wild (haha) day for scarian nation

will of course explore how exactly it progresses to them being (more) okay again, through wild life and also prev seasons (closure and all that)

maybe a grian pov?? TBC but that could be a meaningful full circle moment if we start off with scar’s pov in 3L

paralleling the third life fic, i think i’ll have this one be non-sexual intimacy. yay!

you know, now i'm thinking that i might even write it as a chapter fic instead of a multi-fic series. baby's first chapter fic would be an interesting challenge for my very messy writing process!! but i’ll keep thinking on it.

anyway, thanks for reading if you did all that. please let me know of any thoughts you have! would love to hear and discuss any input x

[dis-astre]

THE JUNE REBELLION: NOT THE FRENCH REVOLUTION

i fear we need to talk about this since i've seen so many tiktok referring to the french revolution when talking about les miserables and it needs to be addressed (aka i'm going to get it out of my system once and for all so i can stop being bitter about it)

i mean, i see those kind of tiktok too much and i am annoyed so bare with me:

so, let's start with les miserables: when does it takes place ?

the chronology of les mis is very long, but the part everyone is referring to (and everyone's favourite part) is the barricades. the barricades takes place during the June Rebellion.

now what is the June Rebellion?

it's a two days rebellion that arise in Paris in an era of political and social instability.

in 1832. 43 years after the french revolution.

so it's safe to say, the plot of les miserables is not at all taking place during the french revolution. and this rebellion was a failure (a flop, as some might even say) and did not overthrow the government (sadly) at all for various reasons.

(see this post here about it, even thought pinpointing the reasons to why a revolution fails is, imo, a bit hard and i am in no way shape or form an historian)

now, for the French Revolution.

keeping it very simple, it starts in may 1789 and end on november 9th 1799 when napoleon did a coup and took the power (others (marxists mostly) might argue that it ended with the death of robespierre, soooo pick your poison). so right of the bat: the french revolution is not one big battle and boom, it's a long period of changes and instability.

i think what people refer to when saying "the french revolution" might be the 14th of July, with the Prise de la Bastille. i know it's a very important event as it is our national day (yay liberty) and it's historically the first big intervention by the parisians (as in the people as in the poor) in the revolution. personally i'm not crazy about this moment (i really really like the march of the women to Versailles in october 1789, insane) it wasn't actually that big of a battle but the repercussions were huge so good job. but here is the problem then, what would make you think this successful battle is the battle we see in les miserables?

[i'm gonna go on a personal mini-rant here but it seriously worries me that so many people, mostly Americans, have so little knowledge of this. i'm not saying you should know everything about french history (as a matter of fact you should not why would you do that to yourself) but it's like... basic knowledge. and what worries me the most is that they think a failed two days rebellion is the french revolution as if it was not an event that reshaped the entirety of the french political system and was a trigger to a lot of changes in europe???? i mean... look at that: ]

i know we have a lot of revolutions in french history but if you need to know one, know the French Revolution, at least just the fact that it was a years long event with successful battles and a successful outcome (not gonna go into the whole it's a revolution for the bourgeoisie thing even if... well it kinda is).

and if you have not read/seen les miserables with your eyes closed, you know that it is very not successful at all !

anyway, that's it !

to summarise:

French Revolution = 1789 / very long / successful outcome / successful battles / not in Les Miserables

June Rebellion = 1832 / 43 years after / two days long / failure / in Les Miserables

Recommendations of...

Movies during the French Revolution = Danton (Andrzej Wajda) / La Revolution Française I and II (Robert Enrico & Richard T. Heffron)

Musicals during the French Revolution = La Revolution Française (Alain Boublil & Claude-Michel Schoenberg, yes same dudes that made les mis the musical) / Les Amants de la Bastille (not good but definitely super fun to watch) / The Scarlet Pimpernel (Nan Knighton, haven't seen it but some of the songs SLAPS)

Now you can obsess on the french revolution correctly ! and it's all very good recommendations too ! yes !!!!!!

(some of my fav les miserables adaptations here too)

i'm done, thanks for sticking with me, i love you all and i will stop yapping now ! buh-bye!

[lucagray813]

Knock 'Em Dead - Epilogue

Rating: T

Word Count: 3,800

Characters: Wukong, Macaque

Relationships: Wukong & Macaque (Could be interpreted as Shadowpeach)

Summary: Wukong and Macaque have a heart to heart. It goes about as well as you might expect.

CW: Alcohol, swearing, references to MCD and violence

Link to AO3 Version

Chapter Navigation: First | Prev

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The cellar door was open and, combined with that gift of a glass of wine, it felt like an invitation. An invitation to what he didn't actually know but there was no turning back now. Macaque would have heard the moment he started heading in this direction - walking away would have him branded as a coward or worse.

He walked in to find Macaque lounging in a setup that definitely wasn't usually here - two comfortable looking chairs with a small table between them hosting a bottle of peach wine and an empty wine glass.

Macaque acknowledged him with a raise of the glass in his hand and a nod towards the empty chair.

He cautiously made his way over and picked up the open wine bottle before frowning slightly at it, "How much have you had?"

Macaque shrugged, "Like half a bottle."

Wukong poured the last of the wine and raised an eyebrow at him when it only filled half the glass.

Macaque just rolled his eyes and pulled a new bottle from the small collection on the floor. Shadows easily removed the cork before he handed the bottle over to him, "Thought I'd wait and see if I was getting a drinking buddy before going all out."

Drinking themselves to oblivion did sound far better than a sober, dire attempt to talk about what had just happened so he topped up his glass, drained it and then refilled it before putting the bottle down.

It was Macaque's turn to raise an eyebrow but he thankfully said nothing as Wukong took his seat, wine in hand, trying to determine how brave he felt.

He sighed heavily before asking, "Why'd you tell MK?"

Macaque shrugged, "He asked."

He scowled, "Cut the shit, Macaque. You don't do anything unless it benefits you so why'd you do it? What are you getting out of this?"

Macaque's eyes flashed dangerously for a moment but he clearly made a conscious decision to bite back whatever vitriol he wanted to spit and instead laughed cruelly, "You know, Wukong, I've read that little book of yours, the story of how you came to be China's darling and, I get it, a life as long as yours isn't easy to summarise - you've got to focus on what's important, right? But could you imagine my surprise when I realised that I didn't fall into that category? That I wasn't important enough to be so much as mentioned in the story of your life?"

Adamantly, he denied, "That's not why you're not in the book! I- You-"

As he struggled to get the words past his teeth, Macaque sneered, "Then what was it, Wukong? Did I just not fit in with your heroic narrative? Would my inclusion have made you look bad? Was that enough reason to let me be forgotten?"

"No! It wasn't like that! I didn't-!" He cut himself off with a frustrated sound before taking a steadying breath and trying again, "Look, I didn't write the book, ok? It was mostly based on Shā Wùjìng and my master's journals and on hearsay. You didn't get a mention because-"

He grit his teeth as he forced himself to admit, "When I got out from the mountain I was too angry to talk about you to anyone and then- and then after I couldn't bring myself to talk about you because I... I just couldn't, alright? The others had their own reasons for not wanting the world to know about what happened on the Journey. That's why you're not mentioned. Not because you weren't important. Macaque, you have to know how much I regret what happened that day, how much I've always regretted it."

He would never be able to put into words the neverending grief that he'd experienced after Macaque's death and unfortunately he hadn't drank nearly enough to even try, his wariness of the Macaque that existed in the present enough to stop him totally bearing his heart and soul.

Macaque's response was underwhelming. He just sighed, sat back in his chair and had another sip from his glass before commenting, "Yeah, I heard the sob story you fed MK. I suppose I should be honoured my death was a monumental enough occasion for the horse to be moved to take action - you know it must have been bad if Áo Liè actually felt compelled to do something."

Disbelief and anger made themselves known in his tone, "That's all you have to say? I'm trying to have a genuine conversation with you about what happened and your response is to insult my friend?"

Macaque continued to act unaffected, "Oh, I could say more, trust me. But what's the point? I already know how this "genuine conversation" is going to go."

That gave him a moment of pause, "... You Listened?"

Macaque had always been pretty reserved about using his Listening as it left him vulnerable for the duration he used it and his Future Hearing, in particular, wasn't one hundred percent foolproof. But that didn't mean he couldn't or wouldn't use it if he thought the payout was worth the risk.

Macaque scoffed, "As if I had time between talking to MK and listening to him interrogate you."

He still wasn't ruling out that Macaque had manipulated the situation somehow - he could have Listened well before talking to MK and orchestrated this whole thing - but he decided to take him at face value for the moment and see where that took this conversation.

Knowing Macaque though, probably nowhere good.

He crossed his arms, "Yeah, thanks for that. Nice of you to give yourself the upper hand - don't suppose you'd care to tell me exactly what you told MK?"

Macaque's grin was petty, "Sorry, only one show per day and you missed it. Such a shame. Though I'm not sure you would have been a fan."

No, he definitely wouldn't have been but if they were finally addressing what had happened then he wanted them to be on a level playing field.

With a frustrated sigh, he sat back, "I don't want to play these pointless games, Macaque. If we're talking about this, then let's talk about it."

Macaque regarded him for a long moment before quietly chuckling to himself and when he addressed him there was a slightly manic look in his eyes, "Alright then, Wukong, let's cut right to the chase, shall we? You regret what you did? Good. You should. But I don't regret what I did."

His voice came out as a hoarse whisper, "What?"

Macaque made a show of reconsidering, "No, wait, actually I do have a couple of regrets. Getting caught? Very disappointing oversight on my part. And the monk? What I wouldn't give to go back and make sure he suffered like he had truly deserved."

The wine glass in his hand never stood a chance but the shards of glass barely even registered as he slammed his hand down on the arm of the chair and gripped it as if it could hold him back from lunging forward, "For as long as he lived, he never fully recovered from what you did to him! He didn't deserve the torture you put him through!"

He didn't know exactly what Macaque had done to him, but he knew what he was capable of and just the thought of it was enough to have his nails digging into the arms of the chair, the whole thing threatening to crumble under his anguish and fury.

Macaque wasn't intimidated by his show of anger and drawled, "Well, that's a matter of perspective, isn't it? Would you like to hear what kind of person your master was from my perspective?"

He didn't but unfortunately he was going to have to if they wanted to make any progress and Macaque took his hostile silence for the go ahead it reluctantly was.

Macaque took a long drink before telling him with conviction, "Your master was a cold and indifferent man, that switched between viewing you as a burden and a tool at his disposal. He cared nothing about who or what you were and yet he expected you to obey him without question. He was a man undeserving of your love and devotion. And if that changed, it only changed because of my intervention."

He resisted the urge to lash out in response to his self-importance as well as his shallow understanding of the situation and his master's character. However wrong or hurtful Macaque's words though he knew he had to hear them through to the end, so through gritted teeth he bit out, "Explain."

Gesturing to his ears, Macaque responded, "Obviously, I couldn't Listen to every second of the years you spent with him before I found you that day, there could well have been fleeting moments of civility that you let yourself believe was something more that I missed but I Heard his disregard for you and I Heard how he punished you."

There was no denying that the earlier years with his master had been difficult and painful. Supposed opposites forced together, they struggled to understand one another and that led to more conflicts than he would care to admit but he didn't blame his master for not always listening to him or for being heavy-handed in his retaliation.

His master had been young and mortal and thrust into a perilous journey with a dangerous, morally grey and bad-tempered demon that could kill him in an instant. Could you blame him for being a little on edge or for being unsure of how best to handle every situation?

And while he had initially been the unwilling muscle for this operation, his master had always treated him as his student. And even if he'd had no idea how to be a teacher to someone like him, he, ultimately, had never given up on him.

Even in those early years, when quite frankly, Wukong had neither wanted to or believed there was any need to change his ways.

But he knew that sort of nuance meant nothing to Macaque, just as it meant nothing to himself at the time and how it would have meant nothing to him if he and Macaque's positions had been reversed.

He could hear the undercurrent of fury in Macaque's voice as he continued, "But even if I hadn't Heard all I had, the way you pathetically latched onto any hint that he actually cared about you when I was the one wearing his face would have been enough to seal his fate."

He wasn't ready to face that ugly truth just yet and so he took hold of the embers fanned by that statement and glowered, "You mean when you lied to me? When you manipulated me?"

Macaque laughed incredulously, "Oh, of course, how fucking vile of me to listen to you, to treat you as if you're feelings mattered! Not once did I ever even tell you that you were in the wrong! Or that you had to forgive me!"

Despite the truth of it, he still growled, "That doesn't make it right! And it doesn't change the fact that your ultimate plan was to get me out of the picture long enough for you to torture an innocent man for information he didn't have!"

Macaque's eyes were filled with venom, "And whose fault was that, Wukong? Did you really fucking expect me to just go home, to sit patiently and wait for you? After everything I'd Heard? After all the time you'd already been gone? What choice did you give me but to take matters into my own hands?"

He knew now that it had been stupid to believe that Macaque would ever have listened to him back then. And even half-crazed from his time under the mountain, he should have known that.

And moreso, if he put himself in the mindset of pre-Journey Wukong and thought about Macaque's actions then they were entirely justifiable. Maybe a touch crueler and calculated than he personally would have gone with but hey, everyone had their own style.

That sort of violence was normal, especially against an outsider who had wronged you and your own. It wasn't considered bad and it wasn't considered wrong.

He obviously knew better now but it had been a lesson hard earned, and one that required a fourteen year journey, with a dedicated teacher at that. But both then and, arguably, now Macaque hadn't been given that same chance to grow or learn the error of his ways. Could he truly blame him for what he'd done?

And as twisted and terrible as what Macaque had done was, Wukong couldn't ignore the fact that he'd done it out of love and loyalty.

And when he'd responded in kind, with the single minded desire to avenge his master, he'd declared to the world that those feelings weren't returned.

That they belonged to another.

And the worst thing was, that he had meant it.

All the fight left him, and shakily he responded, "You're right... You responded how any demon would have. How I would've. How I did."

He desperately wanted to tell him that he hadn't meant for things to end the way they had, to go as far as he did, but the truth was Macaque had been dead the moment Wukong had seen what he'd done to his master.

Regret didn't feel a strong enough word for how he'd felt afterwards but Macaque's death had been no accident.

He took a breath before offering, "Look, there's not a single thing I don't regret about what happened. Our reunion after the mountain, how I- how I responded to what you'd done. I understand why you did what you did, that doesn't make it right but... I can understand why you don't regret it and I... I don't blame you for that."

Macaque sneered at his sincerity, "Oh, you understand, do you? You understand what it is to dedicate your life to someone and be told it's not enough? You understand how it feels to have the person you love most only return those feelings when you're wearing the face of the human who abused him?"

Macaque was on his feet, the glass that had been in his hand now shattered on the ground. His eyes glowed violet as he lunged forward and dug his nails into the arms of Wukong's chair, "You know what it's like to spend centuries suffering in the Dìyù? You know what it's like to crawl out of your grave with a gaping hole in your skull? Do you!?"

His stomach turned at the gruesome imagery.

Beyond the fact that the Lady Bone Demon had been involved he knew nothing about how Macaque had been resurrected. He should have known that twisted witch would have made it as agonising a process as possible.

He fought to keep control of his expression however, even without the alcohol, there was no telling what would make the situation worse and Macaque's teeth were already dangerously close to his face.

He was sure the undercurrent of turbulent emotion could be heard as he quietly responded though, "No. Of course, I don't."

Macaque's eyes flicked over his face, his breath coming out in unsteady bursts before he let out a gutteral growl and raised a fist that went right through the back of the chair, deliberately missing Wukong's face.

Wukong could only watch as he turned away, his tail thrashing furiously behind him.

He knew that the true depths of Macaque's suffering would always be beyond his comprehension. In the same way that no words could ever communicate the maddening agony of his isolation under the mountain, he knew that no matter how willing he was to listen, he would never truly understand all that Macaque had been through.

Despite that, there was an overwhelming urge to do the impossible and somehow make amends, to somehow make all of this right.

Macaque stood with his back to him and with a wavering voice said, "You didn't even bring me home."

Sick with shame, he still tried to explain, "I was going to! Your magic- I couldn't move you until it- I promise you, I was going to bring you home. But the- the Lady Bone Demon got to you first and I-"

"When?"

"What?"

Through gritted teeth he heard Macaque clarify, "When were you planning to bring me home? When was the last time you even went to visit my grave?"

He swallowed thickly, his tongue felt like lead and the ensuing silence said it all.

Macaque's laugh was a bitter, tortured thing, "I really didn't mean anything to you, did I?"

Wukong hunched over himself, his forehead leaning against clasped hands, "Macaque, I didn't..."

Macaque turned around sharply, "Didn't what, Wukong? Didn't think you'd ever have to see me again? Didn't think you'd have to face up to what you'd done?"

Of course, he hadn't thought he'd ever see Macaque again. Of course, he'd never thought he'd ever be in this situation.

While his guilt had seen him haunted by visions of Macaque, he'd never believed he would actually rise from the dead. Wished for it, on occasion, maybe but had never conceived an enemy of his could, or would, go to such lengths to torture him.

And yet, still he responded emphatically, "No! I- I mean I didn't mean to leave you there! Or to go so long between visits. It just... hurt to be there. To remember what happened."

Macaque's grin was unhinged, "And that's excellent why I'm here now, Wukong! To make sure you never forget, to make sure you never know peace for what you did!"

A part of him believed that it was no less than he deserved.

But he hadn't forgotten his master's teachings, or his responsibility to MK, and he knew that drowning in self-loathing and guilt would benefit no-one.

And even if he did accept such a punishment - what kind of life was that for Macaque? Consumed by hatred and pain and obsession? He deserved better than that. At the very least, he deserved the same opportunity he'd had to change and grow.

He was no more irredeemable than Wukong had been, of that he was sure.

In fact, he'd already seen the signs that he was capable of better.

He couldn't fully rule out that Macaque was playing some sort of long game but he'd gone above and beyond during the calamity involving Azure and they'd been cohabiting the island with relative civility for months since. They'd even successfully collaborated on MK's training recently.

He wanted that to mean something.

He didn't dare hope for a relationship of any kind to be rekindled from the ashes but they could have some semblance of peace if they both wanted it, if they both dedicated themselves to achieving it.

But peace was clearly the last thing on Macaque's mind right now. The alcohol no doubt adding fuel to the agonising fire that always burned within him.

Now wasn't the right time to tell Macaque that he wanted to help him work through this. There might never be a right time to tell him that to be honest - he could already envision the offence taken at suggesting he could "fix" him.

So, taking a steadying breath, he responded, "I can't ever expect to be forgiven for how I wronged you but I won't run from the consequences. I deserve to know the full extent of the suffering I caused you and you're right, I deserve to never forget it."

In hindsight, there was no way this evening ended well, no matter what he'd said just now, but still he was caught off guard by Macaque's furious scream as he brought a shelf full of bottles crashing to the floor.

He sat frozen as Macaque viciously spat, "You're so fucking pathetic! The old you, the real you, wouldn't just roll over and let someone else tell him what he deserved! He would have killed anyone that fucking dared! He never would have just sat there and accepted his fate!"

It wasn't the first time Macaque had brought up the "real" him and he was sure it wouldn't be the last.

He resolved himself as he stood up, and Macaque's suddenly wary expression at the action spoke volumes. Firmly, he retaliated, "Is that really what you want? The "old" me? The one that never listened to you? The one that responded to everything he didn't like with violence?"

Macaque took a step back as he took a step forward, "You want me to be the me that didn't hesitate to kill the only person that had loved him unconditionally? Because we both know how that will end."

He held Macaque's gaze unflinchingly until the terror he was met with became too much for him.

His expression softened, "But I'm not that person anymore, Macaque. I'll never be him again. I'm going to listen to you. I'm going to treat you with the regard you deserve. And the only reason I would ever cross that line again was because I was given no other choice."

He wished he could promise that he would never be the one to cut his second life short but if it was a choice between him and MK...

Then he would do what he had to.

Macaque seemed to find his reassurance just as terrifying as his reminder of what he'd once been capable of and Wukong wasn't at all surprised that he sank through a shadow portal seconds later and fled.

He stood for a moment and stared at the spot Macaque had been before sighing and rubbing at the back of his neck.

Well, that could have gone worse...?

They hadn't devolved into violence, at least.

He looked around at the mess on the floor and the damage to the chair he'd been sitting on.

Well, mostly anyway.

Normally, he would have a clone tidy it all up but the weight of everything that had happened had him rolling up his sleeves with little complaint.

He didn't doubt that this had been only the first in a long line of difficult and messy conversations that would be needed to try and move past everything that had happened. And he knew he was going to need every scrap of wisdom, patience and tact he possessed if he wanted to help Macaque find a semblance of peace.

But right now, he willed himself to focus only on cleaning up the mess right in front of him, to allow his heart and soul a moment of respite before they were overwhelmed with the grief and guilt of everything he had learnt.

--End--

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LMK Fanfic Masterlist

[jackhkeynes]

Can you give an overview of your conworld and language for new people?

Absolutely! :D

The World

The setting I write in (hereafter "Boralverse") is an alternate history of Earth. The original difference from our own history (hereafter "IRL") is the existence of the island of Borland (Istr Boral) between Great Britain and Denmark, inspired by the IRL existence of Doggerland.

The human pre-classical history of Borland can be summarised as:

With sea level rise about 8k years ago, Borland was cut off from the continent and from Britain (this is when Doggerland was submerged IRL); some Stone Age people remain. They leave some monuments—burial mounds, the Çadrosc labyrinth—and were farmers, but they had no writing or ironworking.

The Celts arrive in Borland shortly before they settle Britain in the second millennium BCE, taking up iron tools and establishing many tribal groups. Due to some later migration from Britain to Borland, they speak a language (Borland Celtic) which is most closely related to Proto-Brythonic.

I assume that as far as possible the history of the rest of the world is indistinguishable from the IRL history up to this point. I continue to do so while the Romans invade and settle Borland shortly after Britain, despite conceding to credulity and allowing a few classical references:

...in Ptolemy's description of the Pritannoi we can understand he referred to the Insular Kelts of Ireland, Britain and Borland as a whole... ...contrasting Hadrian's policies in Britain and in Borland is vital for understanding their different fates in the post-Classical age...

where I admit that the Roman Empire having an entire additional province should probably have some observable effects.

Once the Western Roman Empire collapses, I start properly diverging Boralverse history from IRL history. This begins with a different pattern of Anglo-Saxon migration; the two petty kingdoms of Angland and Southbar arise in western Borland, while the settlement of England proceeds slightly slower than IRL.

Historical divergence spreads through western Europe over the next few centuries, and by 1000 CE things are beginning to go off the rails all across Eurasia and North Africa. I leave the history of the Americas the same until Old World contact (via Basque fishermen stumbling across Newfoundland in 1470 CE), and likewise with Australia.

The map below shows Europe in 1120, during the Second Tetrarchy Period. At this time, Europe was unusually centralised, with four great empires: the First Drengot Empire (red), the German Empire (brown), the Second Roman Empire (purple) and the Single Caliphate (green).

In the modern era, my hope is that the Boralverse world feels fractally uncanny; at every scale something is unexpectedly different, from political borders and languages to fashion and pop culture references.

For clarity, I employ an inconsistent Translation Convention when writing from a Boralverse perspective, mostly using IRL English but peppering in calques of Boralverse English jargon for flavour, such as threshold force "nuclear power" or jalick "garment socially equivalent to a tuxedo".

The Language

The original motivation for this alternate history setting is Borlish (Borallesc), the Romance language spoken on Borland.

It picked up a few Borland Celtic loanwords from the existing population at the time of the conquest (macquar ~ Welsh magu "raise, rear"; vrug ~ Welsh grug "heather"), but was much more influenced through the first millennium by Anglo-Saxon settlement and then Norse conquest during the Viking Age. The following is an example of late Old Borlish (ca. 1240):

…sovravnt il deft nostre saȝntaðesem eð atavalesem n iȝ atrevre golfhavn seȝ hamar dont y verb divin ismetre ac povre paian. peðiv soul ez font istovent por vn nov cliȝs d istroienz istablir… …uphold our most sacred and ancient duty to let Gulfhaven be the centre from which we will send the Word of God to pagan lands. We ask only for the necessary funds for a new teachinghouse…

The Modern Borlish language has undergone spelling standardisation (most recently deprecated some irregular spellings in 1870), and contains many more Latin and Greek loanwords, along with borrowings from languages across the world.

Y stal zajadau dy marcað nogtorn accis par lamp fumer eð y lun fragnt de mar receven cos equal party a domn pescour pevr jarras e fenogl gostant tan eð eç nobr robað n'ornament fluibond ant queldin raut frigsað ne papir cerous. The night market's various stalls lit by smoky lamps and the sea-shattered moon welcomed flocks of fishwives sampling paprika and fennel as well as notables in flowing finery carrying stir-fried suppers in wax papers.

In terms of sound changes and grammatical developments, the major points include:

Intervocalic lenition /p t k b d g/ > /v ð j ∅ ∅ ∅/: catēna > caðen "chain", dēbēre > deïr "must".

The use of ç (and c before e i y) for /ts/, and the use of g in coda to represent /j/. Along with some vowel shifts, this leads to things like cigl /tsajl/ "darling".

Total loss of final consonants in multisyllable words, including -s, which leads to:

Collapse of noun declension, including number; Borlish does not mark number on nouns, and if it wants to it uses demonstratives or simply relies of verb agreement: l'oc scuir pasc, l'ec scuir pascn "this boy eats, these boys eat".

[fandomhype]

Plagiarism Somerton

I obviously didn't watch the new James Somerton apology video ON his channel because I did not want to give that man the views and you shouldn't either! It has been re-uploaded and summarised elsewhere so that he doesn't benefit if anyone wants to see it.

The original hbomberguy video was wild to me because of all the stealing, I found it highly entertaining, loved all the Memes and it honestly did my imposter syndrome wonders! but then I watched the Todd in the shadows video and it really upset me.

He didn't just steal from other LGBT creators he lied to his mostly young LGBT audiance who were looking to an elder gay for guidance and to learn about their history.

Todd's video starts with a clip of James lies being spread by another person on a podcast, there's clips of people discussing his made up gay nazi fanfic he has presented as hard facts. He actively harmed his own community for cash! There are young gay men bringing that subject up in conversation being laughed at for falling for it and that leaves a really bad taste in my mouth.

Now I'm not a part of that community but a lot of people I love are so that angered me a lot.

...and then he comes back with another apology video, conveniently within the three months he would have had to post something on his channel to retain his monetisation status weirdly?! In which he blames both a head injury and his ADHD for his theft - at no point does he address the lying in either apology video or any of the apology posts he made that I could find.

I have combined ADHD, when I was first diagnosed the NHS referred to it as ADD with Hyperactivity element but everyone seems to have gone back to calling it ADHD and that is the term used most commonly online so that is what I refer to it is as.

I am medicated but there has been a world wide shortage of my medication and I was without it for some time over winter, which was HELL! I got nothing done.

I am in no way a big creator, Youtube for me is a fun wee hobby that will hopefully grow and allow me to collaborate with other people with similar interests but ADHD is for sure a large part of my journey as a creator.

I've published like 7 videos and currently have around 10 being worked on because, you know... ADHD! *siren noises*

I know that I am forgetful sometimes, just for the record I also had several head injuries and concussions as a child because Lil undiagnosed at the time me truly had no fear of climbing or other dangerous activities so I have my script (because free talking a subject with this brain would be nearly impossible) open in one google doc and my research open in another. It's not hard.

That's the way it was at school, college and Uni too. James claims he went to Uni to do business. Every university uses anti-plagerism software for essays and has done since like the mid 2000's? so he knows not to copy pasta. He's straight up lying there.

Another thing he's lying about is his ADHD making him forget he copied things. Now if you tell me a joke that I like it'll stick in my head and I will straight up tell it as my own later, I've been called out for this many times! But entire articles? whole sections of other peoples videos? (he also flipped a fan Vid he had ripped off of another YouTube to avoid detection and tried to pass it off as his own) No that's not something you can accidentally do even with a swiss cheese brain like mine.

Weirdly all the the paragraphs James claims he accidentally copied were also edited to remove aspects of the Trans, Bi and Ace experiences that James markedly does not believe exist. Strange considering he accidentally copied them and assumed they were his own words? Imagine going back through a paragraph you think you wrote yesterday in the edit the next day and finding swarths of things you don't agree with there?!

Why am I telling you all this? Well because I wanted to put my two cents in as a creator with this condition, partly because I felt it was somewhat of an attack on us!? He's put it out there that ADHD creators are liable to steal from others and that's not ok by me. Also I just really like the sound of my own typing!

TL;DR : James Sommerton is a suck ass liar and he doesn't get to use his disability as an excuse for what he did! and...

****** ADHD DOES NOT MAKE YOU STEAL SHIT!!! ******

Also watch Todd's Vid, everyone saw the Hbomberguy one but this one goes deeper:

[eldritch-alicedoll]

Your clothes design are all so impresive! Im so enchanted by both the color and shape you give each one even if theyre only sketches, they’re filled with so much character!!

Have you ever uploaded your thought process after making these ? Sorry if you’ve been asked this before but its a skill i would love to learn too!

😭 @coffepandas thank you! That’s so sweet massage 🥹 this is the support that make me go back to study set&costume design atm (I was there for costume but kinda gaslighting into set too lol but it’s fun 😂)

I had answer some comments but I didn’t explain thing properly about how I come up with the concept of each dress. If that’s something you love to hear then I’m gladly do it! I use to write how I done my design in Thai but most of my friends say it’s very confusing so to come up with the proper explain next time I need picture as well. I’ll make it somewhere this year I promise.

But to summarise what I was talking about for general when I do the concept dress

Thinking

Extract the main idea > Colour pallet ( make a bar and do the colour in and you’ll see how much purple,Black,gold is use in the original character dress)

>texture / pattern ( include accessories gemstone , pearl >> like if it’s Azul i will default his first choice for accessories as something from the sea , if it’s Mal I’ll give something relate to briar valley + main colour is black + texture reference from baroque)

>idea ( just a few word or early concept mostly silly one for me like Vil : some thing he force Yuu to train to wear it. Lilia : classic + twisted of modern + fun. Mal : how can we fit in the carriage��…..stop going over board Mal…..)

>group theme ( dorm theme , the dorm leader is the biggest/grand concept/ Grimm is part of the 1st year small flowers )

>your own reflection (it’s your design so it’s about your digest on the character and story tbh . Consider your taste your liking as big part as well as the other factor when design)

Sketch

1 Silhouette > basic shape if you stop my video process you’ll see I always start with basic triangle / box to see across the set how long / short / shape of the skirt I want to see and balance it

2 be aware that good set of dress need connection + focus > what I mean is they need 1-2 feature that’s you introduce as the gem of the outfit then the rest is the repetitive share between the clothes in your set let me get some examples from Diasomnia set

The 4 dress are different in skirt length and volume but there are minor element that I plan on matching them. Mal-Lilia share baroque gold embellishments. Lilia-Sil dress both short skirt + have a tail (There also share same detail on the chest part but it’s not very clear in the picture. I kinda think from pattern making perspective that both top sew the same way) Mal - Seb have long disney princess gloves and use rose on their head piece. Lilia- Seb top got the same flare across from one shoulder to other.

This is what I mean when I say connection. Cuz you give each dress a focus. For Diasomnia example let look at Silver dress. His soft cages skirt is the unique feature I did not give other dress .

That’s the focus on this outfit then I repeat the material on his top. Then I bring in a connection from Lilia dress , share the palette with Sebek dress (cuz Glorious masquerade outfit they both similar) then the volume of the dress is with Mal.

So you give 1-2 max focus/unique to the dress then repetitive other stuff. Don’t let one detail stand alone. ( in the dress and between the collection)

Rendering

1 check Monochrome (ALWAYS CHECK MONOCHROME) if the dress look weird 80% is because the monochrome is not right.

2 do not introduce something new after the concept is done always refer to the concept. It do not need a scream. It’s like when you cook you don’t need new flavours to garnish your dish.

3 you can styling your character to the outfit but refer back to the concept. If you add something on you need a repetitive in that dress example : if you bring in an heirloom earring in the dress. It need to be repetitive through color or use the pattern of the earrings on something but smaller size + change color and it will work.

4 same as taking something out be aware that every piece have a repetitive part unless it’s a focus part.

5 in Thai culture there is something called ‘hours of the flight’ it’s like collecting exp. You’ll be expert only if you fuck up your dress enough trust me. I’m the genius in destroy my actual work irl. From accidentally rip it apart last min to pick the wrong fabric cuz it’s cheaper and boom a big mess. The classic tale I told everyone is that my Highschool art teacher bully me that I shouldn’t work as designer cuz I’m terrible of it. Please safe everyone from your shit. But I think I’m have a 20 fun years doing what I like.

The short version of it I’ll try to write about each dress later on!

[pinkestlittlebutterfly]

Chapter 136 is out and while it’s generally smart to wait for a translation to say anything Deep about it I’m just Not Going To Do That and simply put a disclaimer right here at the beginning of my ramblings to tell all of you that everything I say might be incorrect and to please take it with a grain of salt. 

Anyways among the many, many things this chapter reveals I want to talk about Lily’s preferences regarding Puccini’s operas. 

Again provided that my wonky attempts at understanding didn’t fail me, in these panels Lily tells Misono about how Mikage used to take him to see Puccini’s operas, and how, allegedly, Mikage liked “Madama Butterfly”, but Lily preferred “Turandot”. Strike Tanaka loves their literary references, of course, and I love talking about Lily, so let’s take a look at those works. 

Summarised very shortly, “Madama Butterfly” is the tale of Ciocio-san, referred to as Butterfly, married to an American at a young age, who desires her for her beauty. When he abandons her for three years, she holds onto her love for him, until he returns with his new, American wife, which prompts her to kill herself in despair. “Turandot”, on the other hand, tells of the cruel, cold-hearted princess of the same name, who swore an oath to only marry a man who solved her three riddles and have those who fail beheaded. Over the course of her story she is challenged by a young prince who answers her riddles but ultimately places his life in her hands, until she eventually falls in love with him. 

Both of these stories are much more complex than that, of course, but summarising them properly would go way beyond how long I wanted this post to be and I will just recommend you check them out if you haven’t yet. The point I want to make is that both “Madama Butterfly” and “Turandot” are, at their core, stories about love: Butterfly believes in love with her whole heart but finds hers empty and worthless, while Turandot rejects love until she sees it at its most strong and gives in to it, granting her a happy end. Love is misery and grief to Butterfly, but salvation to Turandot. 

In chapter 136, Lily also talks about love when Misono calls him out on how he is not being very true to his name “All of Love”, suggesting that despite his stance of “everyone is born to be loved” back in volume four, he never really believed in love in the first place and only ever stood for loveless lust. 

That is, again, assuming I read this part correctly. 

But Lily prefers “Turandot” to “Madama Butterfly”, he prefers the story of a love so warm and true it melts the princess’ ice heart to that which – at least with how he presents himself in this chapter – should be much closer to how he feels about it all. And it might just be mentioned in a throwaway line, but I think it was placed in this chapter on purpose. I think that Lily, like most of us, likes stories that are not about how he thinks the world is, but how he wishes it to be – Lily wants to believe in a love like that Turandot experienced, even as he tries to deny it. 

This is also not the first time that “Turandot” is brought up. “Turandot” is the name of the spell Lily is using to keep himself and Misono trapped on the chess board; the first technique that Misono developed upon becoming Lily’s Eve. In a way, the princess Turandot becomes reminiscent of how Lily positions himself in the game the two of them are playing – a cold-hearted creature, unyielding to love, and cruel in how he rejects it. 

But I think there’s a little Butterfly in him as well.

We don’t know a lot about Lily’s backstory yet, and I am really mostly speculating at this point, but as it’s been with Kuro and Ildio and Hugh, to become a Servamp one’s body must be primed by sin. Like Butterfly, I think Lily has been the victim of loveless lust once – it’s just that he didn’t get the luxury of dying. He became Turandot, somewhere along the way, and how it happened is (hopefully) for the coming chapters to reveal. 

Turandot found love to soften her heart in the end, and I think Lily will be able to do the same. He already has a prince to challenge him, after all. I don’t think he’s being all that honest with Misono, I think he’s trying to rile him up, to inspire hate and rejection, but Misono has grown strong and smart enough to figure him out. And I honestly can’t wait to see it. 

[joycieillustrations]

Hello! I found the scene in the finale between Corlys and Alyn very intriguing but am eager to hear your thoughts on it in terms of whether or not it clarified anything for you/for the representation of Corlys in your fics. I thought your last ask on the subject was interesting as I've struggled to make sense of Corlys and his actions all season. I'm still mostly at a loss.

Hi there! Thanks for your ask 😊

I’m going to preface this with the caveat that I still haven’t watched the episode yet. I’m in the UK so I’m asleep when the episode first airs (don’t have the energy to stay up until 3am anymore 😩) and due to my mental health being a bit rubbish recently, I haven’t really wanted to sit down and watch it. That being said, a couple of friends kindly transcribed the scenes for me and also summarised the performances etc., so I know what happens and how.

In all honesty, it doesn’t change much of what I’ve got planned. What this scene has confirmed for me (and I may be proven wrong by Season 3 when it airs) is my belief that Alyn is older than Laenor. To me, the imagery he uses in his (very justified) angry refusal of Corlys brings to mind an eldest child who saw a life that could have been his taken and given to a younger half-brother simply because he is legitimate. The fact that, in this anecdote, Laenor and Corlys are picking out sweets gives the image of Laenor being quite young - so young that he is still being indulged by his father, something that we see Corlys is not wont to do - and Alyn being old enough to understand who Corlys is, why there is a difference between himself and Laenor, and also to be out working. Now, this maturity and cognisance may simply be because Alyn has had to grow up faster because of his lowborn status, but I think Alyn being older too holds more weight.

Another reason this scene makes me think Alyn is older than Laenor is this anger that is present. He almost sounds - in modern terms - like a child of divorce, like someone who feels like they’ve been cast aside for a chance at a ‘better’ family. To me, this anger would make even more sense if Alyn had been born first: that he’d look at Corlys with Laenor and wonder why he wasn’t good enough? Why did Corlys need another son when he had Alyn? What did he do wrong? What did he do to make Corlys abandon them, abandon his mother (who I’ll refer to as Marilda from now on, even though her identity hasn’t been confirmed in the show)? Why did Corlys come back and father another child on Marilda and then abandon them again? Is he the reason Addam has had to grow up without a father? None of this is Alyn’s fault, of course, but a child blaming themselves for the breakdown of their parents’ relationship is a very common thing (speaking from experience). On a rational level, I think this older Alyn knows that really Corlys could never have married Marilda because she herself is lowborn (and potentially also a bastard), but that doesn’t erase the hurt he feels from his childhood. He saw the man he knew was his father with a wife who wasn’t his mother and watched as they raised a son whom Corlys openly loved and cherished.

I have written a detailed response where I go into more depth about my personal canon re. when the fathering of both Alyn and Addam takes place, what I think about what this means for Corlys and Rhaenys’ marriage, etc. but I think I’ll post that separately. I want a little more time to refine my points - especially as I think there’s a lot of different factors at play when it comes to the fandom’s response to Corlys having bastards - and I don’t want to overwhelm you by making what is already a very long answer even longer!

I will summarise briefly here with this: I think Alyn was born before/very early on in Corlys and Rhaenys’ marriage and that Addam was conceived during a very low point in their marriage where Corlys and Rhaenys were both under a lot of strain. I think the conception of Addam occurred through Corlys making a very poor decision in a moment of weakness, seeking comfort he’d normally find in his wife. From S2 Corlys’ lack of knowledge about Marilda, despite her having two children with him, I don’t think it was an ongoing emotional affair, but rather she was an easy escape for him, having already had a child with him. Like I said, I’ll go into more detail with a later post - let me know if you’d like me to tag you!

Thanks again for your ask and I hope this answers at least some of your questions! ☺️

[hypogryffin]

genuinely curious by what you mean by "jewish (factual)" in your tier list. i can assume for a couple what you mean (sophia as an example) but i dont see how the others could be like jewish-coded! interested in hearing your thoughts

link to the first post for claritys sake, but this is the tier in question:

ok so for clarification: i made the tier list a little while ago and then scheduled it for later to keep uploads consistent, something i usually do all the time but am not for this discussion for now. this means that by the day the tier list posted, i was already a few weeks or so divorced from the actual creation of it, so some of my opinions have changed (as i said in the og post, i was unsure on a good portion of the characters even when i first queued the list), and some of my reasonings behind placements have been lost to time and my silly little goldfish memory.

bc of this, as of now as im trying to find a distinct line between "jewish (factual)" and "jewish (based on vibes)", the criteria for "factual" is sort of murky. some placements in the category were serious, but a lot of them were also entirely for joking reasons, and i had moved on as soon as i was done laughing to myself without coming back to it.

all this is to say, i have no idea how to summarise it, so im going to explain everything i can remember about my thought process at the time so you can see where i was coming from.

SOPHIA:

yup 👍.

ok so for the uninformed, sophia is the name of a gnostic figure and the specifics change depending on the context of which ur referring to her in, but in judaism specifically sophia was given as a translated name for chokmah which is like a being thats like really important in kabbalah and considered like. this sort of i guess personification of divine wisdom?

anyways this is a concept that i doubt im anywhere near the first person to bring up, so im not gonna spend a lot of time on it like i will the things i havent heard other people talk about. like the whole "good friend of humanity" thing! judaism puts a lot of emphasis on kindness and care for other people and i think its important that thats so big for her character and for how jewish she can be read as. she is also jewish because i like her :^).

TATSUYA:

suffers endlessly because g-d hates *him*, specifically, and he hates g-d right back. jewish.

that was a joke. ok so right out the gate i think the whole "fighting hitler" aspect of IS should count for something during the discussion of which characters are jewish. like just putting that out there. anyways tatsuya is jewish because of eternal punishment. specifically, you know how hes like super into "atonement" and repentance? bro would really have benefited from going to a high holidays service lemme tell you. and he does it in a specific way thats like. his atonement is actively trying to repair what hes fixed right like hes not doing what hes doing to be redeemed, hes doing it because its his responsibility to fix whats been broken. i just idk how to explain it properly but thats a thought process your rabbi talks you through in jew school yknow?

also theres this thing called tikkun olam, which literally translates as "repairing the world". so it means more like. doing ur best as a citizen to improve community and country, or general social work. but just considering it as taking the literal translation, then its just like... yep. that sure is what hes doing isnt it

also, killed hitler. hashtag work

KATSUYA:

placed here mostly because being tatsuyas brother, theyd probably be at a similar "level" of religiosity. however there are some unique things i want to point out here;

katsuya like embodies the idea of "tzedek tzedek tirdof" like. its unfortunate hes a cop but for a cop hes a pretty good person? hes pretty uncompromising on right and wrong, and in a way that totally lines up w tzedek tzedek tirdof as its described in the torah.

extra emphasis on his compassion, as in theres like that core facet of judaism, the tikkun olam, where people have a moral obligation to help others; not just do good as oneself, but also stop other people from doing bad. that last bit doesnt really matter, cuz im bringing it up so i can talk about katsuya as a police officer to clear his dads name and try and ensure a better future for his brother. he gave up his dreams for them.

i mean, when i say "giving up his dreams", im kinda laughing to myself bc theres no way he ran it past his parents bc if he looked his jewish mother in the eye and said "i want to be a pastry chef" he would not make it out of the room alive. hed go "my dream is to become a pâtissier" and his mom would immediately be like "no its not its to be an accountant" and that would be the end of the discussion

also, i think he would make some of the best fucking challah in the world. hed make matzo ball soup that could make you jizz your pants just looking at it. look me in the eyes and tell me that he doesnt actually go nuts at rosh hashana when he gets to make the round challah with the raisins in it and stuff or whatever else. there is such a crystal clear vision in my mind of him rocking this apron my dad used to have that says "real men make latkes". it was pink and ugly as sin and i think it would be katsuyas most prized possession.

LABRYS:

her name is fucking labrys obviously shes a jewish lesbian. next.

/j i will actually talk about this. like not mentioning the only survivor of her upbringing, which isnt a one to one considering the death match portion of her backstory but still close enough to feel um. relavant to jewish culture. she acts very...stereotypically jewish?

its not entirely the accent, but it is...part of it. so like i know its like a new jersey accent and that the stereotype is new york, i guess? but im not american and i dont rlly know the difference. they look close enough to each other on a map tho so i think it counts

but also shes like kinda confrontational in a way i specifically associate with jewish people or jewish characters? like not really bitchy but argumentative right, shes got this really sarcastic or mocking sense of humour. and girl kvetches with the best of them.

(also, side note: since i made the original list, i found out that the voice actress for aegis in p3 reload, dawn m bennett, is actually jewish! if i were to remake the tier list, aegis would be moved up from "vibes" to "factual" because of this. mentioning that here because of the sister thing :).)

JOKER:

kills g-d which is the jewish dream. this is a another joke.

someone in the replies of the tier list said something abt a possible reason being that he has an "abrahamic figure" as his ult. persona, which could be a good point if satanael was actually an abrahamic figure! but it is not. like ok im not a history guy but satanael is a name used in the 2nd book of enoch, which arguably could be part of jewish "canon" (i know this is actually the term for it but fandom has rotted my brain and it sounds terminally online to use it in terms of real life religiosity) but most rabbis agree it like is not, and theyre kind of who im listening to on this, and quick google search says even in christianity, enoch is debatable? idk

so like satanael isnt in the torah. and if anyone says "oh its just like another name for satan so technically--" shut up i know. satan isnt real in the torah either. ok like "satan" is used as a term, but not as like the specific dude that like rules hell. hes just like at most a specific dude who is not a devil/cast from heaven or whatever, but instead is a lawyer. more often its a concept, something representative of like the urge to go against g-ds will or a kosher life, this "evil inclination" which everyone is born possessing and grapples with when trying to be a good person. NOT THE SAME AS THE CHRISTIAN SATAN. WHICH IS WHAT P5 WAS GOING FOR. SATAN IN JUDAISM IS NOT A "super demon lord" or whatever they call it in the text of the game

satanael isnt an abrahamic figure and i dont think satan is either cuz its so different between religions and honestly i think calling things abrahamic religions, at least w the context i hear of it, is like kind of a misnomer or just kind of generally misleading cuz judaism christianity and islam are all so different and if were talking about this i think whoever invented the term judeochristian should eat a sheet of glass for it because whenever i hear those terms its very clear the person saying it means just christianity but theyre trying to be inclusive without actually putting the work in and thats not the point of this.

ok if im honest, as i think abt it joker isnt like. really... super jewish, in a way that you can point out? its just like... this overall vibe im having trouble explaining which is probably also like super influenced by how much i like him. i want to say that this strict sense of right and wrong that remains uninfluenced by the rest of society is something that clearly creates or maybe just intensifies this like. empathy for other people that reminds me of this concept in judaism which i cant remember the hebrew name of rn but i think its most commonly translated to english as "lovingkindness", one word? or that the whole idea of the phantom thieves can be contributed to tikkun olam. but, on the other hand, even if lovingkindness is what i personally consider one of jokers core character traits, the other one is pure, blinding rage.

im not going to go super into it, because im a few years rusty of torah study bc its only really consistently done in my community for kids preparing for bnai mitzvah cuz of how few people we have in our congregation. but from what i remember, my interpretation of the exact limit between righteous and sinful anger is a bit more... lax than the average jew's, or at least the average rabbi's, meaning mine, lol. either way anger is almost always seen as sinful because its an emotion that can like. turn you from g-d, its the same thing that invokes that "evil inclination" we just talked abt. so, joker textually feels this rage that arsene, his other self, literally refers to as "sacrilegious", something that very clearly states that he is willing to *knowingly* commit sins for this rage and is perfectly capable of causing undue harm to others for it, which is exactly the reason why judaism warns of anger. this means jokers anger is distinctly against jewish teachings.

again, im really lax, my familys reform (/lh) and i think there are some parts of this characterisation that make me feel this rage is overall constructive, especially considering that is what feeds his constant practice of lovingkindness and tikkun olam, but it being such a huge facet of his personality (made worse bc as a silent protagonist, you really have to search to get away from this trait) brings him down on the Jew Scale(tm).

in short, now that im really discussing this id probably move him to incredibly jewish based on vibes or even to just "jewish" no further classification. but even w the undying sinful anger thing i cant not think of him as jewish and i dont think its just bc hes one of my favourite characters of all time.

also that hair texture looking really familiar is all🤔🤔. all im saying that is in the tutorial, instead of "frizzy hair", morgana deffo should have been calling them blondie and jewfro /j /j /j

EDIT AND JOKERS KITCHEN!! JOKERS KITCHEN!! FOOD AS A LOVE LANGUAGE!! IN P5 YOU MAKE FOOD FOR YOUR FRIENDS AND YOU PUT LOVE INTO IT

MORGANA:

i know i put morgana before joker in the tier but i think in order to rlly discuss morgana we needed joker first bc part of my reason for putting them in the same tier is because they really are a pair, do not separate.

anyways, morgana does have a lot of the same problems as joker when it comes to being difficult to pin down. his inclination to tikkun olam is similar, sort of even greater than jokers depending on personal characterisation of joker, but instead of this discrepancy of his jewishness being anger, the ethical conundrum with morgana is sort of. arrogance? like, i have trouble figuring out how to really put into words how i feel abt morganas "lovingkindness", because it is so hard to understand where hes at in terms of empathy?? like. fucking. idk hes definitely a very caring person but its not exactly like

ok i cant figure out how to say it moving on. i used the word arrogance even though i dont really think thats right, because morgana has never seemed haughty. his "arrogance" is really just him making up for an inferiority complex caused by the amnesia thing, its not as if he genuinely totally believes himself to be above the others. but like no matter what it stems from, the way he behaves and his personal pride hurts people. ie the okumura arc, or his entire relationship w ryuuji. he speaks ill of others, belittles them to bring himself up, etc. arrogance and excess pride is as condemned as anger in judaism if not moreso, since its even less useful/constructive to be "arrogant" than it is to be angry. OH ok so what i meant with the hard to figure out his empathy thing is this actually!! hes very caring and has a really notable respect for human life but its always at war with his need to prove himself, so even if when you think about it its like Oh Morgana Is A Really Caring Person, which makes sense because he was created from human desire and as such is really in touch with what people need, the desperation he has to be seen as "worthy" comes off as wanting to be seen as "above", even if it means trying to get the people around him as being considered "below" him.

tldr so if it was just those two traits i think id have to move morgana lower on the list, alongside joker.

HOWEVER. speaking directly to the other jews in the crowd, but morgana is totally textually a golem, right? like not exactly, obviously, but think about it. morganas a being of the velvet room because he was created from "the dregs of human hope" (canonical line from yaldaboath that i think about more than what can be considered healthy tbh), whose job is was and always will be to protect and guide the trickster and his community, the phantom thieves. hes a golem right? am i insane? am i seeing things? i dont care, im not giving up on this interpretation, so morgana is factually and canonically jewish cuz of it.

ZEN:

i do not remember.

as of today id probably move him to either jewish no other classification or not jewish. my b guys. anyways

JUN:

life is indescribable torment, and then hes also got additional, mostly unrelated, mommy issues. judaism 101.

also his suspenders when he was a kid are the most young jewish lad shit in the history of ever like i have seen that exact outfit on a young boy every time i go to temple, and each time it is a different kid

ok more seriously, i really do think juns story-- specifically his relationship with memory-- can easily be extracted into a jewish narrative. like nyarlathotep messed with his memories and convinced him that the other members of the masked circle killed maya right. and so the way he fanatically reminded himself of the past was a mix of trauma and active manipulation. but if i think abt it a certain way i also can see it as like. ok so in judaism memory is really important and like a lot of the time during for example passover, youre meant to refer to yourself as being a jew in egypt, saying "we" instead of "them" and such. but im specifically meaning how important memory/remembrance is in grieving. jun in his grief for mayas perceived death "kept her alive" in a way. she was never forgotten, and so she never died. even though the entire masked circle forgot, from trauma or fear or guilt or whatever, jun held on, remembering her, and so she survived. joker took peoples dreams but his actions also caused them to be completely be forgotten. they were alive, but they were robbed of their ability to be remembered at all, and so they were as good as dead even still breathing and talking.

retroactively, this idea enforces tatsuyas jewishness, considering the entire story of eternal punishment. he refused to forget the masked circle, even though it hurts.

anyways back to jun, i also think the whole repentance thing is important too. he hurt people in his anger and sorrow and spends the rest of his life (until the world is reset at least lol) atoning for his wrongdoings.

also, i know i said kid him is super jewish looking, but he has not gotten better as hes grown up. 17y.o him is exactly the guy your bubbe will pull up on facebook and be like "this is the grandson of my friend or whoever! you should go on a date with him, hes your age! he looks a bit gay but hes a very successful doctor! ...and hes JEWISH YAKNOW...." and ur like "ok bubbe"

ERIKO:

i actually do not recall exactly why she is in this tier specifically. the only thing i for sure remember was that i at least partially placed her here bc of her fascination with the occult.

HIKARI:

ok this one was kinda me goofing. its the whole extended family thing like whats more jewish than being actively discouraged from a creative career for something "safe" and "normal?" bro the aunt might as well have dropped the "being a doctor is very respectable" line in the song.

but like even without that, wanting to be a director or associated with film? hitting her with the jew beam. mazel tov babygirl.

[nomsfaultau]

Daily ask №23

Story summaries edition!

1. Do any of your family or irl friends or colleagues actually know about your fics? About the plot? How did you explain it to them?

2. When anybody asks you about what Fault is, how do you tend to summarise it?

3. If the characters were asked what they think a story about their life would be like, would they give an accurate response? It's like that meme where one character thinks they're in a comedy while another thinks they're in a psychological horror. Just for the funsies please include the foundation guys as well.

4. What genre would you consider Fault to be?

5. If the fault crew had to write a story about themselves, how well would they do it? Not a story about their life necessarily, just with them as the main character.

Ah literal meta let’s go

1.The answer to this question entails a lot of personal growth on my own end as someone who tends to feel pointless shame about the things I like and tend to keep it private. It was months into writing Fault before I talked about it to my partner in crime, very much in a word vomit soup for hours and hours once I actually opened my mouth. I talk about it all the time with him, though he won’t reading because reading is for nerds lmao. He knows everything but the timeline is squiggly to him. Fault is also 100% his Fault since he’s the one that introduced me to Technoblade and SCPs. Then a few years later I met a buddy who I thought I’d only know for two weeks and so felt more open to ramble about it with them, though completely using codenames for all the characters. Alas she somehow has the determination to maintain a long distance relationship with me despite the fact I’m abysmal with it. So like the discord rp screen shots? I had to edit their names back in from ‘Dadgon’ and ‘bee kid’ and ‘Mr. Fluffy’. She fully knows by now but other people in the server don’t. Still, her being so open about adoring the things she likes gave me the confidence to be less private about my artistic endeavors. 

So now my parents have the ao3 link. I don’t think they were necessarily surprised I was writing given my self published novella, or fic specifically since my mom asked about it once like a year before I started Fault. Dad will proudly explain plot points at family reunions and fully uses she/her pronouns for Tubbo in a move still baffling Foundation researchers to this day. Mom and I discuss the philosophy of characters sometimes. Much beyond that is risky to my financial support due to the queer elements. It’s a somewhat surreal experience in some senses, such as meeting my dad’s roommate for the first time and learning he’s read a few chapter of Fault, or a very confused but enthusiastic uncle trying to explain to me how I could start monetizing it ? They have absolutely no context for any characters, but my sbi-brain rot roommate definitely does and tries to shake me by the shoulders to allow a modicum of fluff. And then like a year and a half ago I made a Tumblr and started talking about it in a more anonymous way that’s made me more comfortable with sharing my thoughts. 

My Dad actually follows this blog. Hi Dad. 

2.I doooooon’t. Like God where would I start. I suppose if I’m being reductionist I call it a 12 year old’s evil government torturing the cool lab experiment OCs standard plot. Sometimes I refer to it as smacking moral philosophies together like action toys. The action/plot isn’t necessarily the point, since Fault is mostly focused on the internal journey of the characters. An exploration of guilt and trauma, in its simplest terms. 

3.The Blade fully thinks they’re in a shonen anime where they can solve stuff with the power of friendship. The Blood God is basically Naruto’s nine tailed fox thing probably if you think about it trust. Philza is in a hurt/comfort and everything that happened in the Foundation is backstory and now they’re onto the healing and recovering and found family part. Tubbo thought they were in a jailbreak leading to an overthrow the dystopia plot line but that’s gone wonky. Upon getting powers Tommy decided (rather forcefully) that he was in a superhero film, and now thinks he’s in hell. Wilbur lives each day like he’s in a slasher with Jason getting ever closer if he doesn’t book it.

Dr. Blake thinks she’s in a horror story and will do anything to be the final girl. This is barely exaggerating. Webb is in a…political plot line..? Faustian plot? Where he has to protect the world via careful contracts and conversations to control the devil. Rosalind thought she was stopping a dystopia before her ‘are we the baddies?’ moment and transitioned into I have no mouth and I must scream OR the candyman according to my comment section. Jasmine’s in a fairytale where she got turned into a fairy. Rhodes was in a domestic slice of life until he got shoved into a dystopia. Lawrence is in a dnd backstory where he joins the guild that fights of goblins or whatever it is ransacking the town. Except whuh woe the goblins have Feelings. 

Also the comedy/psychological horror divide is Charlie and Maureen. 

4. Grimdark urban-fantasy drama with some action/adventure and horror elements. 

5.Tommy makes himself the most OP bestest coolest hottest funniest Mary sue ever. Heavy escapist elements. This is just what Tommy would naturally do if asked to write a book even without the requirement in the ask. Tubbo would be a lot more subtle about it, but MC Tubbo would Always Be Right and everyone Listens to them. MC Tubbo is the leader of the friend group and the books are very slice of life chill stuff. MC Wilbur is similar on the leader portion, but on a much larger scale, barely controlling a turbulent empire. Its portrayal of a fantasy society is seen as alienating, threatening, and very creative, almost absurdist satire. Castle intrigue plot filled with lots of scheming, though most characters are kinda cartoonishly evil. The Blade is proud to present Normal Human Theodore Blade (or The Blade for short) who is just One Of the Guys and can fit inside houses. It’s an adventure comedy and the voices are used exclusively for dark humor but are never a real problem, and The Blood God doesn’t exist. Philza’s would be the most abstract. He’s less the main character and more the narrator, in the way classic books have to have a real character they can use to know about events and serve as an omniscient narrator without necessarily being the lead role. MC Philza is some type of historian or archeologist as a framing device, and the reader only gets to know him via narrator bias, snippets of comments, and footnotes. His book is a hectic collection of short stories spanning tens of thousands of years, each with little connection to the other. It’s praised for the realism, not the plot. 

[kitkatsudon]

KitKat reads the TKEM Novel: Introduction & Prologue & Chapter 1

Hello all! Those that have seen my account over the past couple of days will know that I have recently come into possession of copies of both volumes of the TKEM novel. I always had the vague idea in my mind that these would contain information that we don’t see in the show, characters’ inner monologues and such like, so as someone seemingly on a quest to find out everything there is to know about this show (how did it end up like this? I’m not going to dwell on that before I start regretting all my life choices), I have taken it upon myself to read these books and share this knowledge with the rest of what’s left of this fandom.

These books, of course, are in Korean, which is a language I do not speak and don’t have any intention of learning in the near future. I definitely couldn’t learn Korean in a quick enough time frame to be able to read these books in a satisfyingly short amount of time, so instead I’m utilising the power of the internet and using two online translation services, and then sort of combining the two with my preexisting knowledge of the show to create a usable translation that feels mostly right. So here’s my disclaimer: some of this stuff could very easily be mistranslated, because I’m embarking on this journey with just the powers of the internet, homosexual audacity, and autism to help me along.

So! Here’s how this is going to work. For every chapter of the book I manage to translate, I’m going to make a new post where I summarise the events of the chapter, share my thoughts on it, and then share any specific new details that we’ve learnt. All of them will be tagged with ‘kitkat reads the tkem novel’ so if you want any of the information in this series for whatever reason, hopefully these posts will be easy to find. In this post I’ll cover the prologue and chapter 1 because the prologue is barely anything at all, but from here on out it’ll be one chapter per post… whenever I finish the next chapter.

Ok then. Shall we begin?

Prologue

The novel starts with a bit of preamble about the show’s lore, not much that anyone who had already seen the show wouldn’t know, but I suppose it makes sense to open like this if they were trying to appeal to people who hadn’t already seen the show? It’s an interesting choice, though, because some of this stuff is information we don’t find out until a little later in the show, for example how the two worlds split thanks to the life/death of Crown Prince Sohyeon. However, without the visual nature of the show to keep it appealing, having a little bit of backstory about the Kingdom of Corea would be nice to have so new readers aren’t totally confused about the setting of the novel when it begins.

The only semi-new thing we really learn from the prologue is that the palace (which I will call Haeungung Palace from here on out as part of my personal mission to spread this information) is located specifically on Dongbaekseom island in Busan. This is something I had pretty much figured out already by being a big nerd and looking at screenshots of the show and comparing those to maps of Busan, but it’s nice to have this for real confirmed by a canon source. Another thing to maybe mention is that the flower symbol of the royal Jeonju Lee family is a plum blossom, but this is also something that you could probably work out beforehand.

In conclusion, this is a good introduction… but a little useless to established fans of the show, who I think would make up most of the demographic of this book. Still, it’s best for them to cover their bases.

Chapter 1: Find the clock rabbit

The first thing to mention here is that “clock rabbit” refers to the white rabbit from Alice in Wonderland, which the English subs on Netflix call “the white rabbit with the clock” but I’m going to say “clock rabbit” because that seems to be the direct translation, and it makes all Yeong’s lines about “Is it a rabbit or a clock?” make a lot more sense in my mind. This chapter covers four scenes from episode 1 of the show: the scene where Gon is being dressed by his new attendant Park Gyubong and he catches the talismans that Lady Noh put in his room, the scene where Gon and Koo Seoryeong have their meeting after Gon goes riding, pretty much all of the rowing scene sequence from the race to Gon going to chase after the “clock rabbit,” and then Gon very briefly in his study alone, looking at his Alice in Wonderland book.

What stood out to me the most while reading, getting over the fact that they’ve changed the order of the scenes from the show (Cheonjongo in 1994 is happening next chapter), is how much extra dialogue they’ve cut out. Again… I guess it makes sense, if they’re trying to condense a sixteen episode drama into two volumes of a book then of course they’re going to want to get straight to the point, but this is disappointing for me personally because a lot of what they cut out are the fun, familiar conversations that Gon had with Yeong throughout episode 1. For example, Gon and Yeong never have their conversation after Gon finishes his ride where Yeong reveals that there are more talismans than Gon thought, and they also cut out the conversation between Gon and Yeong in his study after the race day, which means we don’t get “are you having fun, Captain Jo?” and we don’t get their following conversation about Gon wanting to find his saviour, and Yeong assuring him that he’s grown up well and he doesn’t need anyone to save him anymore. Which is… fine. It’s fine, but it’s still disappointing. Even without coming at this from a Gonjo angle, their friendship is still very important to me, and it’s disheartening to find out that where the show abandoned it very quickly, the book doesn’t seem to be developing it at all. That’s not to say that there aren’t moments, but it’s not as much as I would have liked.

The other big thing that stood out to me is… well… how do I put this? The book really wants you to know that Gon is perfect and amazing and handsome and the best man in all of Corea and no one else could ever compare and he’s just so incredible and wonderful and everybody loves him so much and every woman is in love with him because he’s just that good. Which is hilarious to me, as a loser (affectionate) Gon truther, because this man exists in my head as an adorable mess of mathematical equations, overthinking, and pretending to be fine, and it’s just… no matter how many times they tell me how perfect and shiny he is, I’m just not going to believe it. Let me give you an excerpt, so you can see the tone of this and know what I’m talking about.

Gon’s body, which he trained to protect himself against any danger, was perfect because his safety was the security of the kingdom. Gyubong was impressed anew by a glimpse of his hard and wide shoulders.

Gyubong glanced at the pride of the Kingdom of Corea before he could meet his indifferent eyes. His sharp nose, smooth lips, and sharp jawline stood out under his straight eyebrows. The third king of the Kingdom of Corea boasted an appearance that deserved the love of the kingdom’s people.

Like— it’s so unserious! They’re really trying so hard to ram it down your throat how utterly perfect Lee Gon is - and in this scene it reads like Gon’s eyebrows may be straight but Park Gyubong sure isn’t. They also mention Gon’s “long legs” when he’s running after his clock rabbit and… wow, does this answer that age old question? Is this what Yeong knows that Gon uses his long legs for - running away and giving Yeong a headache?

So, after all this, what have we learnt so far?

Park Gyubong is either very confident in his heterosexuality or he has a huge crush on King Lee Gon

“The royal courtiers often found the principled Captain of the Guard more difficult than the easy-going king” which… hurts me, a little, to imagine the palace staff bitching about Yeong behind his back. Does it make sense? …yes, to be fair yes, yes it does, it makes a lot of sense for Yeong to rule Haeungung palace with an iron fist as he tries desperately to take care of Gon’s safety, so I just hope that none of the other members of staff are being too mean about our beloved Yeongie :(

Yeong’s naval rank is confirmed to be a Soryeong/Lieutenant Commander! If you’ve seen my post about military ranks in TKEM then you’ll see that this is something that you can see in the show by looking at his epaulettes, but it’s nice to have it confirmed in writing here

Yeong was described as being “born and bred to serve the king.” This is something we knew already, but having it said explicitly here… it’s doing something to me, so it’s getting its own point.

Yeong specifically says to Park Gyubong that “His Majesty doesn’t like other people’s hands touching his body.” It’s not just any touch, he specifically mentions hands. Fanfic nation, do with this information what you will.

Mentioning the moment where little Yeong joined little Gon in crying after Lee Ho’s funeral is something that hurts Yeong’s pride. We can only assume that Gon knows this because he has brought it up in the past and Yeong has got very flustered about it.

On that topic, Gon thinks about that moment after his dad’s funeral after Yeong is like !!!!! when Park Gyubong mentions covering Gon’s scar.

Lady Noh has been noticeably anxious about finding Gon a partner ever since he turned thirty (Korean age). Gon isn’t sure if it was before that, but thirty is the age that he mentions. The Korean word for partner used is 짝, which Wordreference tells me means “pair, mate, buddy.” Interestingly, not necessarily wife, very gender neutral. This is in Gon’s internal monologue so again, fanfic nation, this one’s for you.

It’s also said that Lady Noh is more like a mother to Gon than his own mother was, which again is something we already knew but it’s very nice to have it written.

It’s crossed Lady Noh’s mind that Gon might have a secret mistress and that’s why he has never been interested in getting married, but she figured that this was illogical because Gon is always being watched while he’s in the palace. Thank you for your hard work, Jo Yeong!

The issue of marriage is apparently the only duty of Gon’s that he ever abandons, which… idk, there’s something there.

Gon feels like he’s free of all his worries when he goes riding, especially with Maximus, so riding is basically like Gon’s therapy :D

Maximus is his “favourite horse” which is something else that’s just nice to have in writing

It is mentioned several times in this chapter that Gon “is the favourite of every woman in the kingdom.” It’s giving… heteronormative, but that doesn’t surprise me. However, Koo Seoryeong doesn’t count herself as being one of these women because she can see up close how Gon is putting on as much of an act as she is.

Koo Seoryeong’s ex-husband was not only from a chaebol family but also a conglomerate leader. This is interesting to me because it’s mentioned in the show that he’s the second son so… what happened to the first son? Is he the leader of his own separate corporation? Was he just not as good as his younger brother?

Gon finds the way Koo Seoryeong is clear about expressing her desires uncomfortable because, as the king, he’s never been able to have his own desires or express his own desires freely

“Yeong’s nerves were on edge” while Gon was rowing in the competition, because it was an outdoor event. He finds these things stressful because Gon already came close to death once, and you never know if it’ll happen again

As soon as he hears a gunshot, Gon is immediately transported back to the night of the treason. Even if he doesn’t show it outwardly, it’s crossing his mind at the slightest trigger.

That time at the rowing competition is the first time that Gon has run away during an outdoor event. He runs away often and he knows he causes trouble for the Royal Guard, but this is the first time he’s done it at an event like that.

Gon can recognise Yeong just by his footsteps

Gon leaves his duties in the palace once or twice a year - either because he wants some personal time, or he’s in desperate need of it because he feels too overwhelmed by his regular life. I already assumed it was because of that, but to have it confirmed… fanfic nation, this is for you again

Gon was still thinking about the night of the treason when he got his Alice in Wonderland book out at the end of episode 1, and he could still vividly feel the sticky blood on the soles of his feet, and the feeling of something constricting around his neck. He felt like it could still happen again at any moment. Clearly, Lee Gon needs some better therapy than just going riding with Maximus.

Final thoughts: I’m very much enjoying seeing into the characters’ minds like this, especially Gon, since we’ve had a lot of him this chapter. I like how the book is able to show how often Gon is thinking about the night of the treason, making it and therefore his PTSD a much more present thing than in the show. It remains to be seen whether the currently hilarious Gon-worshipping is going to become annoying after a while, or whether or not seeing the characters’ inner thoughts is going to start annoying me when the main romance plot gets going. If it’s in the same tone as the Gon-worshipping… yeesh. That’ll be an experience.

My main thought so far? Not enough Yeong. There’s not as much Yeong as there was in the show, and there isn’t even much Yeong there. This book could be greatly improved with more Yeong. I suppose we’ll have to stick to fanfiction for that.

[siyratiin]

my favourite thing that happens ever is when I search up something (mostly happens with animals and prehistoric life n stuff) and I just end up going down a massive rabbit hole on a shit ton of stuff and end up with a search result that has almost nothing to do with what I initially searched

like a couple hours ago I had anglerfish up on google to use as reference for something cause I fucking love anglerfish right they're one of my favourite fish

And my mum walked in and we started talking about it's skeleton cause there was a picture of one on the search results, and I was like yeah but have you seen a parrot skeleton their necks don't look like how they do with the feathers it's cool

so I showed her pictures of a parrot skeletons and she was like woah, now can you get an owl skeleton up I like owls I think they're cool, so I did and we looked at them for a bit

then after she left I got a new art idea from the bird skeletons that I think would be cool, and I was like oh wait what about the shoebill stork that could work

after I had browsed images of them for a bit I got sidetracked and started looking into wingspans

naturally I searched up the albatross

which then led me to learn abt this cool locking mechanism they have with their wings so they can stay gliding for periods of time!!!

and THEN I found this scale picture of this really cool prehistoric bird called the pelagornis which was significantly bigger than the albatross, yet still way under the size of a quez

I think it was roughly the same size as the argentavis but idk I'm not sure I haven't compared them yet I still need to do that

but yeah to summarise I went from anglerfish to pelagornis without intending to and it was awesome

[pepcono]

Just finished project wing man for the first time and fuck me was that ending gut punch after gut punch without any comfort afterwards

Just that last screen...

Also I can't resume campaign now that it's finished. It just crashes

Also On a different note, I'm head cannoning monarch as transfem. Which is admittedly mostly an exercise in the projection school of character analysis.

Consider the following:

the name "monarch": gender neutral but wouldn't raise questions.

He never speaks in game, the cause: voice dysphoria.

We never learn his name, when frost tells us comic and diplomat's names, she doesn't say Monarch's, why would she have been unable to find it? My suggestion, thanks to dysphoria monarch's life prior to sicario (and in it too, maybe) was mostly a blur where he didn't make a trail to follow, kept his head down, didn't talk to anyone. His previous life would not have been a weapon against him because he barely had one.

After beating the mission "Kings" we get the achievement "I see no kings up here" which could be interpreted (wrongly) to mean now that Monarch is alone, after killing crimson 1 who believes them both to be kings, he corrects him, Monarch is no king.

And after finishing the game we get access to Monarch's file, and get to read about who he is! Just kidding it only contains a list of what he's done with sicario. This could suggest that he's so closed off to the others at sicario (except the others of hitman) that they had nothing to say writing his file.

There's frequent reference to hitman searching for something, however what they're looking for isn't explained. So my suggestion: Monarch is the driving force behind their searching. He's for a place that he belongs, maybe he doesn't know that. I believe flying is thhe only escape he has from the dysphoria, prez speaks for him so he can avoid vocal dysphoria. The intensity of focus flight requires drowns out the pain of dysphoria. Or to summarise: Monarch doesn't feel content and is searching for his contentment. He knows flying allows him to feel content, so he assumes the solution must be related to flying.

Of course most of this is circular logic and/or has other explanations.