#this isn’t even related to my last post this is a separate thing that also happened

[theamazingannie]

Was all happy and content cuz I bought some cute Christmas socks at the store and then the universe had to go and push me back down

[lxmelle]

“Best Friend” / 親友

I’ve been mulling over this for a few days, wondering if I’m overthinking things, or if there is actually something to it.

Gojo and Geto are like a pair of parents. And I think it’s deliberate. Hear me out.

See, from a non-native pov, I can pick apart this coined phrase for best friends, shinyuu “親友” or “family friend” into its individual kanji: 親 and 友

The first kanji on its own, oya “親” can be read as “parents”. The second kanji on its own is tomo “友” can be read as “friend”. How a kanji character is read changes according to context within a sentence, topic, or what it is paired with. It can be difficult to explain if you’re not used to the language, so I’ll leave it at that for the purposes of not complicating this post.

They both considered each other their 親友 - best friend. There is only one pair of people who considered each other this “best friend” terminology in the series. Gege could have used Nakama 仲間, or Brother, or even just Tomodachi 友達. TaisetsunaHito 大切な人 is definitely a step too far. No other best friend. Yuji is several people’s “brother” but not best friend. Gojo and Geto are a pair. A duo. The canon-confirmed “たった一人の親友” my one and only best friend status is mutual.

As friends, we know they split up. There is no mention of 親友 / best friend-ism at this point. But they unequivocally considered each other as such, and they never ever had another 親友 until their dying day.

The fact that there is the kanji for “parent” in the phrase for “best friend” is poetic. “Oya/親” is obviously the same word used by Gojo in the kfc breakup scene, because that’s the kanji for it, and that’s what Geto did - kill his parents.

I’ll use this to illustrate:

親 = parents (consisting of mum + dad).

親友🤍 + 親友🖤

To add to the latter, this potential theme, they both go onto adopting kids. Their different parenting styles speak for themselves ofc, but that’s by the by.

Gojo and Geto’s separation played a part in setting off this huge domino effect too. Geto also described how his parents are not his only family now. We also know he considers close non-blood-related persons to be as “family” - like how he offered Kuroi the acceptance of her feelings towards Amanai as “family”. He saw Gojo and the school as family - that is, until he saw how the system was willing to sacrifice their own kind. It isn’t a stretch to see the parallels between what Geto is sharing about severing that bond with his parents (and also with Gojo) and finding another “family” by choice.

Obviously Gege isn’t drawing the parallel by bringing parents into it just due to their best friend status. I headcanon that it was to start anew, not be a hypocrite, to spare them from the monster he’d become, and to eliminate the likelihood they’d be used against him in any way. The last 2 reasons would be to drive in the emphasis that there is a similarity with Rika (who was rumoured to have been the reason for her parents’ deaths although they occurred separately) and... that this would mean that Geto was also separating from his “family” in HI - the duo that was Gojo and Geto. Gojo ascended without him in his quest to become the strongest, and Geto descended to pursue his twisted form of meaning to make his ideal a reality.

It might just be reaching and a coincidence, but I remember that Gege loves these little itty bitty details in character and lore design - like birthdates, dates, flower language, religion, specific kanji used for names, etc - just to name a few. It helps him illustrate significance and I guess adds a touch of sophistication and layering in his storytelling. I absolutely love it. We know by design SatoSugu / Gojo and Geto are meant to be counterparts, so black & white, yin and yang, light and dark, elite and common, even their names are quite fitting, GojO SatoRU and GetO SuguRU .

The kanji / characters selected are also deliberate - Satoru 悟 being “enlightenment” and Suguru 傑 being “outstanding”. The Gojokesa 五条袈裟 was also deliberate, Geto 夏油 has the word “summer” as part of his name and his birthday is setsubun (1st day of spring) where ghosts/evil spirits are chased away. Gojo’s is the heaviest snowfall.

My examples are limited to just satosugu, but you know other characters have similar situations with how the kanji for their names were chosen - e.g. simplest that come to mind is 七海建人 Nanami : 七 = 7 and his ratio technique 7:3 and his hair style too 70%30% parting, 海 = sea, 建人 = human builder (…lol, Gojo entrusted Yuji to him after all…); utahime 歌 = song/music, etc.

My point is that there are a lot of little details like these, so I concluded that I’ll just share this thought I had. The pair of 親友 breaking up is a bit like “partners in crime” no longer being partners anymore, and went about their separate ways but fostered “families” of their own.

TLDR: scene in front of the KFC was really a breakup (◞‸◟)

[theoneprecioustome]

Aikoto Moments Masterlist: Episode Aigis

This list will focus on the remake. To see how it fares in comparison to the original, check this post.

Notes:

Since Makoto isn’t actually in the game, most of the list will focus on Aigis' side of their bond as well as the little things that connect them.

There will also be third party quotes about Aigis’ bond with Makoto.

I bolded the most important moments.

The post is image heavy & contains spoilers for the entire game.

When that person died, there was nothing she could do to bear the pain. The machine girl found herself thinking that she had no use for a heart that did nothing but let her feel pain. And thus, the girl's heart became a blue butterfly, which took flight, and the pain in her chest disappeared. However, in its stead, there was now a large, gaping, empty hole in her chest. The emptiness in her chest didn't hurt, but it also did not let her feel anything. She wasn't alive anymore. Nothing but an empty shell, devoid of emotions, cursed to stand still in time where she was forever with no place to move forward to. — Episode Aigis Epilogue, Persona 3 Official Fanbook. Translation by Nenilein.

PROMOS

✤ The Key Visual of Episode Aigis features Aikoto. What's more, it reveals that Makoto in the original P3R art was meant to be looking at Aigis all along, like two halves of a whole.

✤ Soejima released an illustration to celebrate Episode Aigis. The illustration features Aikoto & Metis.

✤ The First Edition of the Episode Aigis soundtrack comes with a double-sided Aikoto box featuring the Key Visual and their AOA attacks. This is what Lotus Juice had to say about it:

"In the cover, you see P3HERO and Aigis looking at each other... if you open it, they'll be separated... like they're almost within reach of each other, but aren't. I wonder if that feeling gets across to fans as well? It's very beautifully done."

✤ SEGA Korea welcomed September with an Aikoto Calendar featuring the Episode Aigis Key Art (alternative link).

✤ HINEMOS released two more Aikoto Sake bottles to commemorate the release of Episode Aigis.

OPENING

✤ Episode Aigis features an exclusive opening & song focused on Aigis' feelings after Makoto's loss. Full lyrics here and Analysis in the post linked above!

(Lost without you) But little things like the scent of his cologne Is a painful remindеr that he’s gone It feels like my heart is suffocating How do you make amends when you’re gone from me? Even though with a win, how come I feel so lost? Nothing makes sense to me I’m so numb, so lost without you

BATTLE SONG

✤ The new Battle Song, Don't, is also from Aigis' POV. While it focuses on Aigis' feelings through her conflict with SEES, it also has references to her feelings towards Makoto. Full lyrics here!

Already lost my keys to the door wide shut Only had one wish now it’s never gonna come true Trapped in time Forever in remorse How could I ever be in peace when nothing else matters to me?

MENU & UI

✤ In the menu, Aigis is shown holding a blue butterfly who flies away from her. According to the old devs, blue butterflies are used to symbolize Aigis' heart, which is the perfect imagery for Episode Aigis. Curiously, blue butterflies also often used in relation to Makoto, which carries very meaningful implications they're soulmates your honor.

✤ P3R's UI is meant to represent "the Protagonist's Sea of Souls", and it reflects their psychological state. True to form, Aigis is shown looking sad and lonely in hers, which is how she has felt since she lost Makoto. In the Equipment menu, we can even see her reach out before sadly retreating into herself, as if she were trying to catch someone who is now long gone.

PROLOGUE

✤ During the anime cutscene, we see a new rendition of Makoto's and Aigis' last moments together.

MARCH 31ST

✤ Aigis is the one who kept Makoto's Evoker after his passing.

✤ Aigis says that the one thing she feels certain of is that Makoto wouldn't have blame any of them for what happened, showing how well she understands him.

✤ Junpei comments that he’s glad Aigis has been “hanging in there” (spoiler: she isn't) because "It really seemed like you cared about him more than anything in the world."

✤ Aigis reveals that she remembers her last moment with Makoto whenever she closes her eyes. Depressed, she kept having the same dream over and over again: running after him, calling his name but never being able to catch up.

✤ She also recalls the promise she made him during the rooftop scene: "I promised to protect him, and I made that my reason for living. But now... that promise can never be fulfilled."

✤ Aigis says that one day, her sadness "mysteriously" left her. She stopped dreaming and requiring sleep. Unbeknownst to her, this is the event that draws The Abyss of Time to the dorms.

✤ When Aigis is scared of losing more precious people, she sees Makoto walking away from her and desperately tries to reach out to him. Then, Athena metamorphoses into Orpheus. It's interesting to notice that the effect used when Makoto disappears is the same effect used when Orpheus appears.

✤ Aigis and Makoto have the exact same Velvet Room and Aigis can even access his entire Compendium. In other words, they must share the same space “between dream and reality, mind and matter.”

✤ Elizabeth also explains that a Persona "represents one's heart and soul." Aigis can use Makoto's as if they were her own. Let that sink in!

✤ When Aigis thinks that reaching the Answer to Life may lead to her death, she is surprised to "discover how little the possibility bothered me." With Makoto gone, Aigis has lost her reason to live. It's to the point that when Aigis believes that she may die if she loses her key, she says: "If I did, then that would be fine..."

✤ During one of the activities with Metis, she comments on how fulfilled she feels whenever Aigis trusts her with something. If the player lets Aigis say "I think I understand", Metis will say: "Then you must have someone in your life who's just as important to you as you are to me." Which is quite big, because Aigis is literally Metis' everything lol

✤ Aigis getting Makoto’s power means she "inherited" something from him.”

✤ Aigis says early in the game that normally, people have a reason to awaken to their Persona, but that for her it was backwards. She had a persona and then she gained a reason (protecting Makoto). Later, we discover that the reason for her awakening to the Wild Card was that with Makoto gone, she has lost her purpose and her reason to live.

✤ The door that lies in the deepest part of The Abyss of Time leads to Aigis’ past and the moment she awoke to the "Persona abilities" Makoto had. In here we see Aigis' dream, the one where she runs after Makoto, trying to reach him in vain. We also find out that she was in so much pain and so lost after his passing that she wished she could go back to being just a machine again.

It was so painful losing him... I couldn't bring myself to do anything, so... I just hid in my room. For a while, I did nothing but chase after him in my dreams...

✤ Aigis' trophy is called "The one who dreamt", after her dream of Makoto.

✤ After the fight with Shadow!Makoto, he disintegrates into blue butterflies as Aigis desperately reaches out for him.

✤ Aigis can't decide whether she wants to go back to the past, or respect Makoto's sacrifice and remain in the present. Irritated by Aigis' predicament, Yukari accuses her of running away from her own feelings for Makoto.

✤ Metis explains that she would do anything to protect Aigis, because she is "all she has". This prompts Aigis to say that she, too, once felt the same way about someone.

✤ Aigis being willing to lay down her life to not have to fight her friends makes Metis break down. She echoes all of Aigis' buried feelings at Makoto's sacrifice. "Why do you have to die? Why does it have to be you...? Why can't it... be me instead? Please don't leave me behind... I'll give my life for the key, too! And if that doesn't work... then I'm coming with you! So we can always be together... Please, don't leave me all alone!" 😭

✤ Aigis realizes that she has been running away from her own feelings. Before going back to the past, she needs to know why Makoto did what he did—because she won't give up on what's important to her.

✤ After that fight, Aigis finally acknowledges that she wants Makoto back, too, and explains that she needs to know exactly what he did before she can make a choice. Despite her own feelings, Makoto's come first to her 😭

✤ Aigis screams "No!" as Erebus aims for Makoto. We also get two new shots of Aikoto's last moments together, showing Makoto smiling peacefully on Aigis' lap.

✤ After the final fight, Yukari acknowledges her jealousy over Aigis inhering Makoto's power and says that just like Makoto, Aigis is the one who knows how to move forward.

✤ Aigis reaches the very same Answer to Life that Makoto did: Friendship and Bonds are what give people life.

✤ Metis tells Aigis that there's still a way for Aigis to keep her promise to protect Makoto, and that is by fostering connections with others, so that they may one day reach the same answer they did.

✤ Metis is revealed to be Aigis' Shadow: the manifestation of the heart Aigis wished away after losing Makoto.

✤ Once Aigis regains her heart, she breaks down crying at last, finally processing her grief at losing Makoto.

✤ Before she fully fades away, we hear Metis' voice talking to Aigis and telling her how she can reach Makoto so he won't have to carry on alone anymore.

ENDING

✤ Aigis goes back to the rooftop for the final cut-scene. Just like that last day she spent with him, there are cherry blossom petals blowing in the wind.

✤ The credit song, Brand New Days, is once again from Aigis' POV. It focuses on her feelings towards SEES and Makoto as she walks forward into a new tomorrow.

There are days when I tire of calling out the meaning of my life, and my head droops But still, in my heart (So look up to you) Is your smile

✤ During the credits, we see Aigis looking back over her shoulder as she walks through the Moonlight Bridge (the place that started it all for her and Makoto). Lastly, cherry blossoms once again welcome her when she reaches the school. Considering their meaning (Don't forget about me), I'd like to think they're yet another reference to the fact that Aigis will go on living—forever carrying her memories of him.

✤ The Clear Data Save features Aigis' portrait over a cherry blossom background. If you beat the game on Heartless, a cherry-blossom-colored butterfly is added and placed over Aigis' heart.

EXTRAS

✤ In Orpheus' myth, he descends to the underworld in search of his dead wife, Eurydice, but ultimately fails and finds his own death. Knowing this makes Aigis having Orpheus as her main Persona even more meaningful. Not only is Orpheus' Makoto's Persona—so it's like he's left a piece of himself with her, his own version of I'll Never Leave You—it also represents Aigis' plight during Episode Aigis: either moving forward or going back to the past in search of Makoto. Unlike Orpheus, Aigis is eventually able to move forward carrying her memories of her beloved with her.

✤ Aigis' Compendium is signaled by a bookmark with a red butterfly, while Makoto's is the same bookmark but with a blue butterfly.

✤ Two dictionary entries evoke Aikoto. The first is That Day, which mentions it's "the last day Aigis ever spoke to him." The second is Aigis' Past.

✤ One of Elizabeth dialogues is "Do you posses the power to overcome any adversity as well? Just as he did...?" Another of her dialogues foreshadows Elizabeth wanting to ask Aigis to help her free Makoto's soul from the seal ("When the time comes, I may ask you to..."), just like in Persona 4 Arena.

✤ When Fuuka learns that Aigis may die if her key is taken, Aigis explains that she didn't want SEES to worry over her, too, when they're all "doing what they feel is best... for him..."

✤ Just like in The Answer, Yukari spends the game jealous of Aigis because she heard Makoto's last words and inherited his power—although this time she luckily handles it a lot better. This leads Mitsuru to explain that Yukari doesn't mean Aigis any malice; as she does so, she acknowledges Aigis' feelings and says that Makoto did no mean any less to Aigis than he did to Yukari. Later, Yukari herself ends up acknowledging Aigis' feelings and suffering over Makoto, strengthening their friendship.

✤ It's revealed that both Mitsuru and Yukari made promises to Makoto, or rather, to themselves after Makoto's passing. This bears mentioning because Aigis' promise to Makoto is never described in such terms in the game. At the contrary, in the original game, Yukari even goes as far as comparing them to say that unlike Aigis' promise to Makoto (あなたと違う), hers was one-sided (一方的に), highlighting that Makoto was there to acknowledge Aigis'.

✤ Metis tells Aigis that "The souls of all living things are connected through a plane similar to a sea." The Seal of Souls is likely where Makoto & Aigis are shown together in the opening, and the storyboards even describe it as an "unexpected reunion" 😭

✤ Mitsuru decides to give everyone their Evokers back, so it’s fair to assume Aigis still has Makoto’s.

✤ The Persona 3 Official Fanbook holds a short story about Aigis and Metis (I included an excerpt of it at the top of this post) and a column on the symbolism behind Aigis getting Orpheus (Orpheus, just like Aigis, went to the underworld in search of his lost beloved). While it's not material that came out with this version of Episode Aigis, it's still as relevant (and touching) as ever, so I really recommend reading it.

[simplydannie]

["The Set Up"]

If Floyd were in Veneer's shoulder pad instead of JD and Veneer never needed to take a troll's talent to sing, I bet he'd have Crimp disable the built-in vaccum so the button doesn't work when he presses it. Before and during the Rage Dome show, he'd probably be trying to figure out how to free the trolls.

Bruce, being a dad himself and having witnessed the whole thing from Veneer's other shoulder pad, would figure out Floyd's relation to Veneer pretty fast.

Can you imagine Floyd attempting to fend off Ruff and Gruff and going like, "GET AWAY FROM MY SON!!"?

You just keep giving me the best ideas! And I love that! Ty so much! ❤️ Veneer would definitely have Crimp do that! But tbh I canon Veneer to be a little tech savvy himself (an HC keep forgetting to post). After getting the shoulder pads, Veneer would tinker with them, being able to disable the himself. Floyd would trust Veneer and hop on back in the diamond. Bruce on the other hand is hesitant, he trusts his brother. Vennie is determined to help him get their brothers back along with freeing his sister… up until the events of the Rage Dome show here the following events take place:

The Set Up (Alternate Version)

Link to main story here.

“How can we trust that this works?” Bruce asks as he was placed back in his diamond and onto the shoulder pad. He hesitantly looked up Veneer, then to Floyd opposite him.

“It’s going to work. Trust me, and I trust Ven.” The small Troll looked up and smiled at the Rageon. Veneer gave him a small grin, but was then over shadowed by sorrow. “Hey, what’s wrong?”

“…You should’ve gotten out while you could..” Veneer whispered.

“Not again. Not without you or your sister. I am NOT going to make that same mistake again.” Floyd told him. Bruce watched the interaction between the two…something began to feel familiar….His thoughts were cut short as the door to the dressing bursted open.

“Time to go.” Ruff declared. Veneer swallowed the lump in his throat as he stood up. The Bergen escorted him out and to the black limo waiting for them to take them to the Rage Dome show.

Veneer was silent the entire way. He could hear Velvet talking excitedly, but her voice was muffled…All he could think about was how could he break Floyds brothers free, how could he escape this mess with his sister…alive. Out of the corner of his eye he looked at Mistress. She was way deep into her phone to notice anything…

“Veeenn? Hello, Earth to Veneer!” His sister’s voice finally caught his attention.

“What?”

“Were you even listening to a word I was saying?”

“Uh….”

“Never mind. Let’s just go out there and kill this!” She exclaimed as the vehicle pulled up to the red carpet.

The moments that followed were all a blur to Veneer. Smile, let them think you love them, Mistress said before they stepped out. As if in a trance, the twins walked down the red carpet waving and smile, they signed autographs, blow kisses to their adoring fans. They stopped for a quick interview. This isn’t real, Veneer continued to think to himself…none of it. The way they got here, it wasn’t real, it was fake…they were frauds…and they had to get out. But he had to play it smart…if he didn’t, it wouldn’t only be him that Mistress would kill, it would also be his sister.

They made their way through the entrance and towards the entrance of the stage where they were to perform. They were placed on two separate platforms that were to rise center stage.

“Ready?” Velvet asked as they touched up her last makeup.

“Ready.” Veneer smiled to her holding out his pinky. She wrapped hers around his tightly….Something they had come up with since they were younger.

“Promises.”

“Promises.”

Bruce glanced around the exterior…a realization hit him. He banged on the diamond with his tiny fists attempting to get Floyd and Veneer’s attention. “Guys! I over heard something that vile woman said. She said about marketing something look like an accident.”

“What.” Floyd stated.

“Kid! You have too…” He was cut short as the lights went black and music began playing in the back ground.

“Troll time.” Velvet clicked the center button. It absorbed the essence of the Trolls that were in her diamonds. She radiated with a light, her glowing a pink pigmentation that Veneer hadn’t seen before…a fear began striking him. He did the same…but Floyd and Bruce only pretended they were being hurt…What Veneer did to the shoulder pads worked, their essence wasn’t absorbed.

The platforms began to rise.

“HELLO MOUNT RAGEOUS!” Velvet screamed into her mic. The chants and screams of the crowds were muffled to Veneer’s ears…a nervousness began to settle over him…he had never felt this way at a performance before…did the essence really do that?

“You have to do it. You have the talent in you, Vennie…I’ve seen it. You can do it.” Floyd reassured him. The Rageon nodded and joined his sister in the melody of the song. It was soft at first, but his voice grew as his confidence did. He held back though, he didn’t want to over power his sister…he knew that’s what Mistress didn’t want. Bruce stared at Floyd who smiled up at Veneer as he sang…a smile like a proud father…the realization his Bruce…That’s when unfamiliar sounds began to emerge from under them. The platform Veneer was on began to rattle and shake. The Rageon looked down, his heartbeat began to quicken.

“What the…” He murmured as the sounds continued to rumble from within the platform. “Vels?” He turned to call out to his sister. She heard the sounds herself.

“Ven?” She said.

SNAP! Just then the platform broke in half. Velvet screamed her brother’s name as she reached out to grab him, but she only touched the hem of his frilled sleeve. She screamed as she watched her brother tumble towards the ground, the debris of the platform following after. Velvet attempted to press a panic button hidden with the platform to try and lower it….but it stayed risen. The screams and cries of the audience echoed through the auditorium as they witness what happened. They began to flee and run out in horror.

“SOMEONE! HELP! PLEASE HELP ME BROTHER!” She cried from the risen platform. Oh god, please okay, she thought as tears stung her eyes.

It took a moment for the dust to clear. Floyd and Bruce stirred inside their diamond. They were dizzy, but they were unharmed. They looked at the fallen debris around them…it seemed as if the entire Rage Dome had fallen, but it was just everything that was left over of the platform.

“Ven?…VEN!” Floyd called out. He peeked through his diamond. Veneer lay face up, one arm sprawled out on his side, the other resting on his stomach, he breathing was ragged and heavy, blood coming from his nose and mouth. “Ven. Answer me please!” Floyd cried.

“….I can’t….I can’t feel my legs…” His voice was almost a whisper. The Trolls looked to see that some of the debris had fallen on his legs, “….it hurts…it hurts so bad…” Veneer attempted to take a deep breath, but that even stung his lungs…he coughed out blood.

“Oh god. No…no…no…no!” Floyd panicked as he banged against the diamond, attempting to break it. “I’m here Ven! It’s okay I’m here!”

“Floyd.” Bruce attempted to call out to his brother…he knew the feeling…the feeling of seeing your child hurt…He felt himself be lifted. Through pain, Veneer reached over and took out each diamond…he released the Trolls. His arms fell limp again on his side as the pain shot through. Floyd ran over to him, placing his two little hands on Veneer’s cheek.

“Hey, I’m here. I’m here. You’re not alone. You going to make it through. You hear me. You’re going to make it through!” He leaned his tiny forehead on Veneer’s cheek. Yes, Bruce understood now…he understood what these two meant to Floyd…he knew now that he wasn’t going to leave without them. Noises were heard far off…the sound of footsteps approaching them.

“Floyd..we…we have to hide at least.” Bruce said.

“No.”

“…Run….” Veneer whispered through his pain.

“NO!”

The footsteps grew louder as they got closer. Whatever it was big, as the ground shook for the small Trolls. Suddenly out of the debris, two Bergens appeared: Ruff and Gruff. They looked down at displeasure at the Trolls. They saw that Veneer was still alive…this wasn’t part of the plan.

“Kill the Rageon. Eat the Trolls.” Gruff said. Ruff smiled as he attempted to stomp on the Trolls. They moved away in time, leaving Veneer alone and exposed to the Bergens. Gruff hovered over Veneer.

“Night night.” He reached over to place his hands on the Rageons head, ready to snap his neck.

“NO!” Floyd wrapped his hair around a tubing of debris. He swung and swung gaining enough force and momentum. He slingshotted himself straight towards the Bergens forehead. His force was so great that it knocked the Bergens out cold, causing him to fall backwards. Ruff stared in bewilderment as his brother was knocked out by a tiny Troll. He snarled his teeth at Floyd.

“DON’T YOU DARE TOUCH HIM! YOU STAY AWAY FROM MY SON!” Floyd screamed up. Ruff laughed as he reached down to grab Floyd, but the Troll being smaller, was quicker. He diveraged from the Bergen, through his legs. Using his hair, Floyd shot straight up. While in the air, he wrapped his hair again and shot straight for the Bergens stomach causing hims to groan. Floyd noticed a metal piping on top of the Bergens head. He wrapped his hair around the pipe and pulled…

CRASH! It fell straight on top of the Bergen, knocking him out along with his brother on the floor. Floyd waited moment, he then ran to Veneer again…He was still breathing, he was still alive, good.

“I’m getting you out of here!” Floyd tried his best to move the giant debris off the Rageon. He felt a hand on his shoulder. Floyd turned to Bruce who had a small smile on his face….tears began to sting Floyds face.

“I get it now bro. I understand. And I’m going to help you get him out…We’ll need some back up though.” Bruce turned…out from amongst the debris, gray Trolls began to appear…Under Rageous Trolls. Floyd quickly got in front of Veneer, protecting him.

“Rageous Trolls? They hate Rageons.” Floyd said.

One little gray Troll got in front of all the other ones, the leader by the looks of him, “We do. But we saw everything happen. This Rageon really means a lot to you doesn’t he? We heard what you called him.” Floyd swallowed the lump in his throat not knowing what to answer, “We’ll help him. We’ll get your kid out and to safety.”

[rottenpumpkin13]

Responding to the Zack/Seph friendship thing as an ask because I have no idea how shares work and the comment space isn’t long enough :P

But as fun as that idea is- that Sephiroth didn’t do it because Zack reminded him of his dead friends- I honestly think it’s because he just couldn’t relate/was too distressed from everything else happening. I know CC happened within the span of like… five years? Maybe? And I’m not sure how all those events line up in the timeline but regardless, I think it’s mostly because Zack was young, a couple years younger than Sephiroth, and Sephiroth mostly became friends with Angeal and Sephiroth because he felt they could understand him, since they were also part of a similar “project” like he was and- I believe this played a HUGE part- he thought them to be the closest to his strength level. I think him being so far superior to everyone else in every way was what caused him to be separate and that was something he was very aware of, and now there are these two people who are almost as good as he is and so he knows they’ll treat him as an equal rather than as a hero, idol, or something surpassing a human.

While Zack was also undoubtedly strong, I don’t think Sephiroth ever viewed him as a friend, he just viewed him as Angeal’s student and probably didn’t feel like they could ever be equals. Because as much as I don’t think Sephiroth ever wanted to be different, I think he still had a good degree of arrogance nonetheless. Deep down he knew he was better, and he knew what that entailed, including always being set apart from others unless they were in the same league he was. There’s an argument to be made that Zack DID at least reach the same level as Genesis and Angeal did by the end of CC, but Sephiroth probably already had a notion of what Zack was like and his perception of him never changed even as Zack progressed.

Of course the events happening in the game probably didn’t help, so to that agree I do also agree with your assessment of why Seph and Zack never got closer. I mean his best friends basically both died and now he’s left alone again, and prior to that it doesn’t seem like Seph really knew Zack beyond just as Angeal’s student so they never had time to bond when things were alright, and afterwards Sephiroth didn’t have the will to befriend someone else- who he never saw as an equal, who he always thought was weaker- who would also likely die. If these two people who he thought to be on par with himself died, why would this weaker person serve as a decent replacement?

I have my own qualms with Angeal and Genesis- particularly Genesis- and how they treated Sephiroth, but in Sephiroth’s mind it was enough that they were willing to spend time with him and treat him like a human, regardless of the fact that they were closer to each other than they’d ever be to him. Great and now I’m sad about Sephiroth all over again 🥲 the poor guy really had nobody. It’s no wonder he went crazy. Actually it’s a wonder he was a good person for 25 years before he snapped, most people would’ve gone full Homelander a lot earlier.

Sorry for the rant, it seems like the question riled me up a bit 😅

I'm going to put myself in Sephiroth's shoes and say the emotional and mental exhaustion he endured from everything that happened in Crisis Core—from the training room, degradation, desertion, the Genesis War, Angeal's death, and then Nibelheim—would be overwhelming. If it were me I wouldn't have the energy to relate or form friendships with anyone after that and wouldn't want to, and things like that would be the last thing on my mind. That last post was just a depressing thought I had at *checks watch* wow it's late. I think it was the trauma and exhaustion from everything rolled into one blunt that finally got smoked at Nibelheim.

Though I do think Sephiroth cared for Zack in some way, part of that definitely had to do with seeing a bit of Angeal in him since Zack inherited his sword and all. I can't say it better than @altocat did in this post, but the signs were there.

And I'm going to politely disagree with Sephiroth being arrogant. I don't see him as someone who cares about status and being equals with someone or not. He was thrust into a position at a young age and grew up naturally isolated at the metaphorical top, but I don't think that made him arrogant at all, and if anything this isolation fueled the loyalty and devotion he had towards the few friends he did make. I also see Sephiroth as someone who doesn't open up to people easily. We know he knew Angeal for years before Crisis Core when they were young teens—and if you want to add context from Ever Crisis, this would be right after the Rhadore mission where all that happened, so Angeal's (and Genesis's) friendship came at the right time.

I would say Zack's did too, but again, plot context is key, and Sephiroth was already going through so much in CC. Also, kind of like you said, there's the relatability aspect and the age gap, but I personally don't think it was because Sephiroth saw Zack as inferior to him in any way.

[fiercynn]

on otw's $2.5 million budget surplus: for fuck's sake do something with our money

the recent ddos attack on ao3 illustrated that the otw (@transformativeworks) has amazing volunteers who were able to get things up and running again after a cyberattack. and i’ve seen a bunch of different people urging others to donate to otw in light of the attack.

the problem? not only are the volunteers not going to get any of the money, but the otw likely isn’t going to do anything else with it, because they already have more than $2.5 million in budget surplus that they have not been transparent about with their members, and that they have no plans for.

yup. we’ve known for years that otw had at least $1 million in their “reserves”; they’ve said so at their last two public finance meetings in 2021 and 2022. but a few months ago, @manogirl and i went digging a little deeper because we suspected that there was even more. 

and we were right. from the documentation available, our estimate is that at the beginning of 2023, they had $2,585,841 that was not dedicated to any purpose. this does not include money they had budgeted to spend in 2023 on regular expenses. just extra. (keep reading to see how we got that figure.)

equally appalling? they have all this money and are barely earning any interest on it. satsuma on dreamwidth looked at their 2021 tax returns and found that only ~$10k of their money is held in an interest-bearing savings account, which resulted in them earning only $90 in interest income for 2021. the rest of it is not in interest-bearing accounts. it is just sitting there.

looking at all the crises and dysfunction that have been discussed and uncovered over the past few months - racist harassment and the three-year-old promise to hire a diversity consultant; the mistreatment of volunteers by the otw board both related to last year’s CSEM attacks, and, separately, mistreatment and racism towards chinese and chinese diaspora volunteers both in the past and recently with the closure of the otw’s weibo account; and of course, this latest ddos attack - all of this indicates that there is severe dysfunction within the org. and donors throwing more money at the organization clearly isn’t helping.

the otw board needs to get its shit together and hire people to help with these things. this is not a new idea - there’s been talk for years about hiring paid staff, and in fact, at their july 2021 board meeting, otw said they would be appointing a volunteer who would be known as the “paid staff officer”, to come up with a plan for hiring paid staff. (to be clear, the “paid staff officer” would be an unpaid volunteer.) it’s been two years since that commitment. they have not, to my knowledge, appointed that officer yet.

it’s infuriating, because otw’s “scrappiness” as an organization is constantly used to defend their obstruction of action on things like racism, and this ddos attack will be used to further that agenda as well. but otw doesn’t need to be scrappy. they are well-resourced and could be using that money to set up more sustainable systems, instead of burning out and mistreating their volunteers, and reneging on commitments to address racism and harassment.

at the very least, if they’re not going to do anything with their massive budget surplus, they should stop taking more of people’s money. but we’d rather they did something useful with it.

if you want to see this change, the otw finance commitee holds a public meeting where you can ask questions and give them feedback. last year it was in mid-october. you do not have to be an otw member to attend. i'll definitely be making noise about it once the date is announced, but you can also follow otw's socials.

one brief aside: at the time of posting, a lot of these links are not working because the otw's website is still down. i copied these links from a twitter thread i made in the past and they should all be correct, so you just may have to wait until the site is back up to look at them.

now, to debunk some common excuses that people (not otw representatives, mind you, but just people on the internet who have decided to defend the org) give when confronted with how much money otw has:

MYTH: otw needs to keep $2.5 million in cash reserves in case of an emergency or unexpected revenue shortfall. REALITY: it’s true that nonprofits do need SOME cash reserves for those cases. typical practice is to have 3-6 months’ worth of operating expenses. otw’s current operating expenses are ~$520,000/year, so 6 months would be $260,000. (and, in fact, when i was told by an otw finance committee member that they had $1 million, they were intending 25% of that to be for emergencies, around $250,000). if you were being REALLY cautious, you could have reserves up to one to two years. but $2.5 million is enough for almost FIVE YEARS OF OPERATING EXPENSES. that is an absurd amount to be hoarding, especially when otw’s history of fundraising is that they always exceed their goals, and always make more money in donations than they need for their expenses within a given year. MYTH: they need this money for legal costs if they get sued. REALITY: otw gets most of their legal expenses donated, which is also not listed in their budget, but is in their audited financial statements. in 2021, the most recent financial statement we have, you can see on page 10 that they received just over $230k in donated legal expenses. they do budget some minor legal expenses yearly: in 2023 they’ve budgeted a little over $5k for “registration fees for conferences and hearings and funds set aside for legal filings if necessary, as well as an allocated share of newly adopted OTW-wide productivity tools”. however they do not have a history of even spending that much: in 2022, they had budgeted $4k for legal expenses and only spent $244 (see cell C29 of the budget spreadsheet). they have never been sued, and they do not appear to budget for litigation costs. and when, in the past, they’ve been asked about what their reserves are for (back in fall 2022 when the finance committee told me they had $1 million in reserves, even though this was patently false given their tax documents for 2021), litigation costs were not brought up.  MYTH: they just haven’t had enough time to figure out investment options. REALITY: they clearly have at least one savings account set up to generate interest, which only has $10k in it. even if they haven’t figured out a full investment portfolio, why wouldn’t they put more money in that account? in the u.s., the federal deposit insurance corporation (FDIC) insures bank accounts up to $250,000, so they should have at least that much in there. absurd. also, they have had plenty of time even for a larger portfolio. if you search “investment” on their site, you’ll see that they’ve been talking for YEARS about investing their reserves. more specifically, at both their 2021 and 2022 finance meetings, they said that they needed more time to research investment options. as usual, they have had far more time than they need.  MYTH: they need this money for new servers. REALITY: otw does in fact include expenses for new servers and server maintenance in their yearly budget reports. you can see this in their 2023 budget spreadsheet if you go to the sheet “program expenses” - under “archive of our own”, you’ll see server expenses. the $2.5 million is money that is EXTRA to their listed expenses and revenue in that spreadsheet.

finally, see below where we’ve given more context on otw’s budgeting and showed our work in coming up with these numbers.

showing our work

firstly, i should note for the record that i sent a message to the otw finance committee through the contact us form on the otw website on may 11, 2023 to ask them to state the amount in their reserves.

it has been two months and i have still not received a response (which i find funny, because at the last otw board meeting in early july, the board specifically said to use that form to contact the finance commitee if we had questions about the 2023 budget), so @manogirl and i were forced to do our own math. we've had this work checked by a number of people, but of course we were only able to work with the information the otw has made publicly available.

a few things you need to know about the otw’s budgeting:

they release yearly budget reports on their website (here’s their most recent one, which shows what they project for 2023 and their “actuals” for 2022), but they do not include their surplus in this report - they only include the revenue and expenses for each year

they also provide both their yearly audited financial statements and their yearly tax returns (form 990s) on their reports & governing documents page, but currently, the most recent statements we have are from 2021

otw typically raises more money in donations than they need within a year, so their surplus is always growing 

they have used the term “reserves” in the past to talk about money, but we don’t know exactly what they mean by “reserves” - is there a dedicated account that they consider their reserves?

because of these uncertainties, the goal for @manogirl and i was was to figure out how much of a budget surplus OTW had at the beginning of 2023, and because we don’t know how they define “reserves”, we defined it as how much they had in liquid assets that were not being dedicated for a specific purpose in their budget. (liquid assets are anything that can be converted into cash quickly – e.g. not equipment like their servers, nor anything that would be held in a long-term investment account, etc)

the first document we looked at was their 2021 audited financial statement. the key number is on page 11, under the section on liquidity, where it lists their end-of-year liquid assets as $2,315,841.

so at the end of 2021, they had over $2.3 million in liquid assets.

but since their 2022 audited financial statement isn’t up, we had to turn to their 2023 budget, and specifically, to their 2023 budget spreadsheet, where they show the “actuals” (what they actually raised & spent in each line item) for 2022 in column C. as i mentioned, they don’t list their reserves in this spreadsheet - only the revenue generated & expenses paid within that year, not anything carrying over from the previous year unless clearly outlined.

so at the bottom you’ll see that their net income (revenue minus expenses) in 2022 was $493,564.94, and that they then transferred $400,000 of that to the reserves sometime in 2022.

and the remaining $93,564.94, their adjusted net income for 2022, presumably carries over to help pay initial expenses in 2023 before they started earning more revenue. they also transferred $130,000 of their reserves BACK to help with that at the start of 2023.

so now we have the numbers we need to calculate the surplus (including reserves) at the start of 2023:

$2,315,841 (liquid assets at end of 2021) + $400,000 (transferred to reserve in 2022) - $130,000 (transferred from reserve in 2023) = $2,585,841 USD at the start of 2023

so that’s our math. otw had $2.5 million at the beginning of this year in surplus, in addition to around $223k (last year’s $93.5k in income and the $130k they transferred back from the reserves at the beginning 2023) to fund their expenses for the first half of this year. this does not even include the hundreds of thousands they raised in april 2023 during their fundraising drive.

okay the main part of our documentation is done, but if you want to read a little bit more about what @manogirl and i learned from doing this deep dive, here are a few additional thoughts/nuggets:

first of all, OTW is incorporated in the u.s. state of delaware, which is interesting because as @manogirl researched, delaware is a tax haven where 501c3 nonprofits don’t have to pay any business tax. plus, in many u.s. states, nonprofits have a limit on the amount of money they can keep without spending, but this too is not the case in delaware. of course, incorporating in delaware to take advantage of those benefits is not illegal! but it is very savvy, a characteristic that seems to have not continued with their financial management past their original incorporation lol

next, some more detail on their finances from their 2023 budget spreadsheet. let’s start with revenue.

the most interesting thing to me here is that while their spring and fall membership drive donations bring in the most, non-drive donations are also substantial. also their “total unrestricted net revenue received” is $975,638.36 in cell C16. however, for some reason, when they calculate their net income for the year, they use cell 12, “total unrestricted revenue” ($1,012,543.42) instead. the difference between those two cells is that cell 12 is the amount before their transaction fees are subtracted. but i have no idea why the transaction fees would be ignored when calculating their net income. is this an error?

next, their expenses, which came out to $518,978.48. not too much surprised me here except how low their legal advocacy spending still is, plus  the fact that they’d given francesca coppa a grant for her book on the history of fanvidding, lol. (i’ve written more about this; so has wistfuljane on dreamwidth if you scroll down a bit from here).

it’s also interesting to look at what they’ve budgeted (both the revenue & expenses they’ve expected going into the year) for 2022. in every revenue category, they have exceeded their goal, except for $50 in “other income”. and in most of their expenses categories they have overestimated their needs, except for going over about $700 in the transformative works & cultures, & about $500 for development. this just shows how much they are able to meet their yearly expenses (overestimated) with the revenue generated each year (underestimated), & still have substantial amounts left over (almost half of revenue transferred to reserves)

so that’s what we’ve found. if anyone else notices weird things in their budgeting, please let us know!

[joyful-witch]

Besties I strongly dislike Scott Cawthon but the fnaf movie was good and I’m annoyed that it was good. Like. The joy I felt watching the movie (and also cried like twice cus it hit way too close to home as an older sibling) is unparalleled. But also. Scott Cawthon is an awful person and supports people who want me dead? And also doesn’t believe women should have the right to basic medical care? And. My feelings are so conflicting rn. I want to separate my love for the series from Scott Cawthon. But if I did that I wouldn’t be any better than HP fans.

I think it’s okay to have these complicated feelings and talk about them. I’m still trying to figure it out myself?

I guess the big difference between JKR and Scott is that he avoids talking about his opinions and the only reason we know these things is due to his voting record and who he gives money to (which btw I don’t believe donating to lgbt charities makes up for voting for the party that wants to commit genocide against us. It’s still shitty. Like yay he’s donating to the Trevor project but also. Damn voting for these people that want us to not have rights and don’t want us to be alive really hurts).

He is still actively harming the community. Even if he isn’t outwardly spewing hateful rhetoric (unless he’s gotten worse. Or unless his opinions have rapidly changed over the past couple of years. If so please feel free to correct me, just not without sources).

But his series has basically transcended his control. It’s not controlled by him. It’s controlled by the fans. Half the shit that’s canon now wouldn’t be canon without the fans and it’s this big collaborative effort and that’s what’s so beautiful about it. Unlike jkr whose views and specifically racism are baked into her properties.

But he still gets money from it.

And he could be using that money to support some really awful people.

Idk. It’s complicated.

I don’t like or support Scott Cawthon. But I love fnaf. I grew up with it. I love the community. And it really influenced my love for horror media. And gods this movie was great. I had such a good time watching it.

I don’t know what point I’m trying to get at.

I guess I’m just sorta venting.

It sucks loving something when it’s creator who actively gains money from it supports some truly awful people.

I want to be able to put my feelings aside so I can joyfully rant about this movie without mentioning “gosh I wish Scott wasn’t involved” but that obviously isn’t the case.

I don’t expect any response to this post. Im just sorta putting my feelings out there into the void. And if someone relates I hope they know they aren’t alone.

And if you’re gonna say something hateful or something that outwardly supports conservatives I will gladly block you. There is no excusing the active genocide being perpetrated by the Republican Party against the queer community, but more specifically trans people. And if you support that then you can gladly get the fuck off my page. I will not tolerate bigotry.

Also don’t harass anyone mentioned in this post. I really don’t want their fans to harass me and don’t want them to have a reason to. I’m not very popular but last time I posted about Scott I got a bunch of death threats from a bunch of middle aged white men and trolling teenagers. And I do not have the mental capacity to deal with that right now. I’m dealing with a nasty bout of Covid and a nicely sized second degree burn from a cooking accident on top of my chronic illness I don’t need to be harassed.

K thanks bye

[freetobeeyouandme]

A My Little Pony Hypothesis

Wrinkle in Time posting reminding me I never actually posted my own My Little Pony hypothesis because I meant to post it as part of a larger analysis of dragons in ST and then never did. lol. Anyway, I think the thing they're referencing with WiT may be one of the kids in that book letting himself be caught by the hivemind to locate their father and then getting left behind during the rescue mission, forcing the protagonist to come back and save him with the power of love. And the MLP references in the show actually also suggest (and therefore support) this version of events.

So in the MLP episode "Escape from Midnight Castle" the ponies are attacked by the evil centaur Tirek who also kidnaps four ponies to turn them into dragons to pull his chariot so he can subjugate the whole world with his Rainbow of Darkness. His plans are stalled because one of the kidnapped ponies is too small and he can't turn it. Meanwhile the protagonist ponies go to find the Rainbow of Light and then go to Tirek's castle to free their friends. While infiltrating the castle Applejack is captured and turned into a dragon. The ponies manage to stop Tirek last minute by overtaking the Rainbow of Darkness with the Rainbow of Light, which also turns everyone back into what they were. And all the ponies lived happily ever after.

So what's that got to do with Stranger Things? Well, Dustin explicity mentions the episode in S3 when he’s arguing with Erica about her status as a nerd, because Erica is into MLP and since that has nerdy stuff like castles and dragons she is a nerd. Erica then embraces that identity, gets into DnD, and names her character after Applejack. Who then ends up defeating Vecna in the S4 game...which made me wonder whether the MLP reference is actually important foreshadowing -- and who then is represented by Applejack. Personally I think Will is most likely, because while “getting turned into a dragon” does fit Max in S4 I think Max is actually the too small pony from the initial four that get kidnapped: Vecna’s first attempt to kill her didn’t work and even the second one isn’t quite complete, he just separated her consciousness from her body by the looks of it.

This is also why I think it’ll be Will. At the end of S4 we see El trying to find Max to get her to wake up, but she can’t find her. That’s not gonna change by her trying harder in S5, so I think if they want to go find Max they need to go into Vecna/The Mindflayer’s head and find her there (and i think that may be one of the priorities in the first half of S5 because of the heavy Star Wars parallels we got elsewhere). And the only person who was part of it before is Will, so I think she’ll end up piggybacking in through his mind. Plus that would let Will’s promise of “fix it together” from 4.01 come true. It also resembles the way the ponies infiltrate the castle in MLP AND Charles Wallace letting IT control him so he can find his father. In both WiT and MLP this rescue mission doesn’t quite go the way it was intended. Applejack gets kidnapped and turned into a dragon and Charles Wallace is left behind as part of the hivemind while the other kids get out with their father. Both of them are later saved by their friends, Charles Wallace explicitly with love, and Applejack with a very thin metaphor for it. 

These themes are obviously also present in Stranger Things and people have already pointed out this similarity (and this potential plot) in relation to WiT, but I think it’s interesting to note that the DnD game which clearly foreshadows the events of S5 also references a piece of media that also has this type of plot. I also think the whole love vs. hate/anger thematic also points to Will because the topic of (romantic) love is important for his character arc in a way that it isn’t for others. El also wants love but her’s is familial and tbh with the return of Hopper I think her S5 arc will be taking the love she knows she has and turning it on Vecna. Will on the other hand is wanting, and I think vulnerable on that level -- but also a formidable foe once he realizes he can have everything he wants. Which is also a great way of involving their personal arcs and the love triangle in the supernatural plot. 

Tl, dR: I think the theory that the writers posting about WiT means Will is gonna help El find Max and then get stuck in the hivemind, needing to be rescued with (Mike’s) love are very likely because the show references an episode of MLP multiple times, including in the foreshadowing of the DnD game, in which that exact plot also happens. And I’m very excited about it because I have been turning this idea over in my head for weeks now and I love it.

[roseandgold137]

(uploading this as its own post)

Two versions with and without background <3

basically her origin (which has pretty much stayed the same since I made her like. Three years ago now oh my god) is that, during a school trip to lexcorp, she gets separated from her class and who not during an evacuation bc it’s metropolis and they have regular alien invasions there idk.

all those rocks? The heart? That’s platinum kryptonite. That’s her heart. According to some of my dc encyclopaedias and also Google platinum kryptonite permanently gives humans kryptonian powers - as is the case with Gotham Girl. While mi-sun (sunny is her nickname) is separated from her group, she stumbles into the labs that are restricted from public view and finds all manners of kryptonite.

being a curious child that just ended up in a weird ass room with weird ass rocks, sunny feels herself drawn to the platinum kryptonite. And maybe, if she hadn’t walked towards it, she would have been fine, but at that moment the fight that she was supposed to be evacuated because of collides with the side of lexcorp and the room sunny is in is completely destroyed. The box that was housing the platinum kryptonite shatters, and the pieces of platinum kryptonite pierce sunny’s chest and lodge in her heart.

(Fun fact: her name was originally going to be Shard bc of the shards of platinum kryptonite in her heart)

obviously this isn’t a very healthy thing, and sunny is unconscious for hours while everyone is frantically searching for her and assuming she might have died during the collision. Either way, sunny wakes up and kinda… isn’t fazed? She feels like she should be way worse off, but she can’t even see any marks of the explosion on her - at worst, she feels a little dizzy, but even that fades.

Mi-sun goes back to the orphanage (yes she’s an orphan I forgot to mention that further up but let’s be real. When is a character not an orphan. There’s a limited number) and basically acts as if nothing’s wrong, bc as far as she’s concerned nothing really is.

meanwhile, lex has realised that despite being able to recover all of his other kryptonite pieces, the platinum kryptonite is mysteriously missing. And, lo and behold, who was the last person seen in the room by the cameras before everything exploded?

It doesn’t take long for lex to locate sunny and it takes even less time for him to realise that she has been affected by the platinum kryptonite, and his plans change from get the kryptonite back to get the child and study the effects. Mi-sun, obviously not very keen on becoming a lab rat and still not fully realising what’s happened, runs and runs and runs and - since when could she run this much? And why isn’t she actually running on the ground? And, oh, now she’s flying. That’s great.

Of course now that she has begun flying all of her other new powers decide that it’s the best time to activate. And boy do they activate. As in she immediately starts the whole sensory hell and glowing yellow eyes as seen above. She can’t handle this (obviously, bc she’s been a normal human child up until this point) and crashes into an island.

that island is Hawaii. I wonder who she could meet there. Maybe it’ll even be someone that can relate to not wanting to be luthor’s home experiment.

Kon (who’s probably in his early twenties) finds this raggedy looking child and tries to offer his help. He gets a facefull of eye lasers instead. Initially he thinks that it’s a trap and mi-sun is intentionally attacking him, but eventually he realises that she’s really just having the worst day ever of all time and again, offers to help

this time he doesn’t get a face full of lasers and once mi-sun calms down enough to explain what she thinks happened, Kon decides to bring her to the fortress of solitude to investigate further. There, they run some tests and confirm that yes, the platinum kryptonite is in her heart, and no, they can’t safely remove it and it really seems to be the only reason she survived at all, so removing it could just kill her.

Kon calls Clark and Kara in to help, and they start planning how to handle these issues with Luthor and mi-sun herself, but sunny doesn’t involve herself in the conversation

reminder that she is a child, and is only about fourteen, and like any fourteen year old child in this kind of situation, she’s fucking terrified. She’s just been told that lex luthor does indeed want to keep her as a science experiment and that the thing that’s keeping her alive could also easily kill her. And so she runs again, because that’s the only way she’s ever known how to deal with her problems, and she’s never tried to touch her feelings with a ten foot pole

this is an objectively bad decision and now that she’s essentially been turned into a kryptonian by the platinum kryptonite, the green kryptonite that lex loves to employ has every effect on her as it would have on superman. She narrowly evades capture but she’s significantly weakened. Lex corners her, and it seems like the chase is over, but Kon swoops in and quickly cuts that short. Clark and Kara take on lex’s army of drones and Kon gets sunny to the safety of his Hawaii home

(He didn’t bring her to the frotress of solitude bc she’d already run from there once and he needed to calm her down again, and a massive echoey ice palace is not really the greatest place to achieve that)

eventually Kon officially takes on a mentor role for her and is her kind of not really dad, and sunny helps found the next iteration of young justice with various other new heroes, but that’s her origin yeah 👍

[psychic-refugee]

Post cr to @percycloud

I’m doing a separate post to respond to @kumiho20 because there is a character limit in replies of posts and brevity is not my forte. lol

I also think this is an important point that should get as many eyes on it as possible.

The short answer to this is: I don’t know. Obviously, I don’t work for Netflix nor am I privy to anything relating to PHW’s professional life other than what everyone else sees on social media. For me, even less so because I’m only on Tumblr. I am reliant on others to post things he posts from IG.

Given that, I think the answer, the true answer for the public, is that no one knows for sure.

Presuming these pics were from Instagram or Twitter, I think people need to realize the difference between when a picture was taken vs when a picture was posted.

In this instance, we only know when it was posted. Given the length of his hair and weather wise from what they’re wearing, the picture could have been taken any time within the last several weeks. From a quick google search, IG does have a queuing feature. It’s possible that he took this pic weeks ago and is only now posting it.

As a side note, it is not advisable to post in real time when you will be going on vacation/extended stay from your house. Some celebrities have learned the hard way of letting the public know when they won’t be home only allows robbers to plan to steal from you.

At bottom, I think people need to really get it through their heads that social media isn’t real. It’s curated with purpose. People post what they want you to see.

This is where people really need to use critical thinking skills and not just knee jerk react to things posted and take everything on social media at face value.

This is not to say he is definitely in the second season, again I do not know. I will not, however, make presumptions based on social media posts or the lack thereof.

Given the harassment, I wouldn’t be surprised if he continued to lay low. He also has a film festival to think of. I think if there was proof either way of his filming for Wednesday, it would overshadow the premier of WSSF.

It could also be that he was let go from the series and is trying to enjoy time with friends rather than sulk or brood in the unfairness of the decision.

Either way, I’m going to respect his decision to not confirm either way. He and Netflix are doing things this way for a reason, and in the end I hope PHW is protecting his peace above all else.

[svtellify]

the vacker legacy and their golden boy: fitz vacker

welcome to my new psychoanalyzing kotlc characters series! i thought i’d start with fitz because this particular reread of the series has brought up some interesting facets in his character i had previously overlooked. i’ll try to keep this objective (focusing on canon and what shannon has written) but i’ll also include some of my personal opinions about him in a separate section at the end, to keep my bias out of it.

(apologies for how long these are going to get, i’m having a little too much fun with them!)

now.

fitzroy avery vacker.

it’s no secret that sophie is infatuated with him from the moment she meets him. but that’s sophie. this is about fitz (and while i do mention the love triangle situation and how it develops, it’s not really about the ships - that deserves it’s own moment to shine.) it’s also important to remember that the series is from sophie’s perspective. this is an unreliable narrator, and it shows us fitz through sophie’s eyes, but also through the other character’s eyes. 

from the start, we’re told that fitz is the golden boy, the youngest telepath to manifest in the elven world and an incredibly powerful one at that. he grows up as a part of the vacker family, which is quite possibly the most powerful family in the lost cities, regardless of who the councillors are. all the elves grow up with money, but fitz grows up with status. what sets him apart from biana is how this status evolves between the two of them as the vacker legacy itself unravels.

in the first book, fitz is, from a writer’s standpoint, boring. he’s too perfect, never making mistakes, and busy being handsome and smart. obviously, given that the series is from sophie’s point of view, it makes sense that her gateway to the world remain untainted, regardless of her feelings for him. where we really start to get to know fitz is in exile. we get to see that perfection shatter entirely, and as a writer, it’s beautiful. fitz is ugly when he’s mad, shouting and screaming and blaming everyone but himself - outwardly. it’s no secret that he thinks highly of himself as the golden boy of the vacker family, and it’s hard to imagine that he doesn’t place some of the blame on himself for not being his dad’s first choice - or being able to fix alden. 

still, his anger is a remarkable facet of his personality - and just what makes him a great foil to keefe. we’ve all seen his temper flare up in exile, blaming sophie for the memory break going wrong.

fitz isn’t used to things going wrong - as i’ve mentioned in other posts, he’s a creature of perfection of habit. he’s used to being the best, and while he admires sophie’s powers and her strength, that doesn’t mean he necessarily knows how to accept it with grace. in other words, he’s never been second best. 

despite all the kids being young, fitz is the oldest of sophie’s group at the time. and his reaction shows his age, but not his maturity. he’s quick to blame and reacts without thinking - his anger brings out parts of him that he normally doesn’t reach for. fitz is always the one who prefers plans and thinking things out, and rarely do we see him like this. as a reader, it’s easy to hate him for this reaction - because we know that it’s not sophie’s fault. and the rational fitz is supposed to know that too - and he does.

kind of.

fitz’s greatest weakness as a character is that he doesn’t grow from this outburst. it’s not the first, and it’s not the last either. he’s a prideful guy - and with reason, he has a lot to be proud of. he’s not the best at apologizing either - it’s a cycle, where he gets mad, has an outburst, and apologizes with gifts to fix things. 

this wouldn’t be such a big deal, i mean all of us have different love languages, right? but there’s a constant in the people he gets mad at (neverseen and related villains regardless. that’s justified anger, even at alvar, although that’s a little more complicated) and it’s:

1. sophie 2. keefe 3. dex

starting from the last, but not the least, dex. even after it’s revealed in (i believe) lodestar, that dex used to eat alone in his alchemy sessions and the vackers weren’t necessarily the nicest to him, snobby over their status in the elven world etc., we see him get mad at dex for hesitating over the situation with alvar. it’s particularly interesting, considering we never really see fitz bond with dex, just dex tell sophie that he’s going to be nicer to the vackers now that he understands them better. this is apparent to be a little more one sided in their interactions, and it gets worse with the reveal that alvar has “forgotten” his memories. fitz is ready to condemn him, but when dex isn’t, it upsets him. 

remember, alvar was a part of the group that kidnapped and tortured sophie and dex. his supposed crush and his friend. and yet, both of the victims are feeling a little more kind hearted than fitz, who is alvar’s brother, yes, but it’s also been made clear that he isn’t as close to alvar as biana is. and yet.

as for keefe, his reasons for hating keefe make sense. and they don’t. if anything, he should be able to understand where keefe is coming from, especially since he *does* seem to be aware of keefe’s feelings for sophie. and despite the fact that they’re supposed to be best friends, he’s the least sympathetic to keefe’s situation. he’s betrayed, of course, they all are, and he’s angry about it, because of course he is. that’s normal - and it all adds up. where things get weird is when we realize that fitz doesn’t know that much about keefe. sophie’s the first one up to his house and keefe even says he doesn’t bring friends home, but it’s clear that he’s never talked about it with fitz.

fitz also has a tendency to not take keefe seriously, which the other characters all do an extent, but they know when to take him seriously and when to not. but fitz misses a lot of keefe’s growth and he still sees keefe as this weird kid that skipped a grade and likes to play pranks. keefe’s a shell of the person fitz knows at this point, and this is something they both need to come to terms with.

fitz’s pride comes into the picture here, manifesting as willful ignorance. he doesn’t know about keefe’s situation because, quite frankly? he didn’t want to sympathize with dex either. he’s a proud guy and this is GOOD characterization but. he kind of looks like a jerk.

in regards to sophie, these scenes sum up both how he feels about her and why i think they’re not good together:

i’ve talked a little about fitz and perfection and why he sees sophie as perfect even though it feels like he shouldn’t - and i don’t want to rehash all that so i’ll leave a little link to some thoughts i had regarding a scene in stellarlune, so you can check it out here. warning: stellarlune spoilers. the non spoiler version here: fitz craves perfection. his world was always perfect, and so was he. he’s the golden boy, after all, isn’t he?

what makes it so hard to have sympathy for him, after all i am an eldest daughter in an indian family with gifted kid burnout and a queer identity crisis - i know pressure lol it’s all i’ve ever known - is that he simply can not let go. he expects that painful level of perfection from himself, and it’s sad that they can’t have a little fun with the chandelier incident. he thinks that sophie would expect that kind of perfection from him, and for that reason, he thinks the problem is his levitating.

obviously lol, it’s not, but the boy  but he also expects that kind of perfection from others, and thinks that others ALSO want that perfection, as seen in how he handles the news that sophie has found out who her genetic mother is. 

more on THAT later. i doubt i’ll be able to stay objective on that scene so i’m saving it for the end of this little piece. (which is not as little as i was hoping, but if the people are interested, i could do a part two where i answer questions instead of just winging it!)

the second scene’s literally from the next page, but his pride and focus on perfection converge in on telepathy. sophie’s better than him, and there’s this undertone that this bothers him. he’s losing - and perfection always wins. here it is again - sophie’s ridiculously strong mental barriers. the point of trust. 

part of the reason the sophitz relationship was doomed to fail from the start is the emphasis fitz places on their abilities. but we’re cognates is a cry for the little boy who wants his place back as the best, and sophie is his return to greatness. it’s not a bad thing when done right, but fitz can’t see past that. his sense of trust is misconstrued and believes it means sharing everything, never mind the fact that sophie’s a part of a rebel organization with thoughts planted in her head that could change the world. literally. the black swan planted them there.

(is the humor helping? i feel like we’ve been bashing fitz a bit for his lack of growth and i would apologize because i do think he’s a valuable character and a well written one at that, but a bit unlikeable when it comes down to it.)

he’s had his trust broken and people have hidden things from him, but in the grand scheme of things, alvar’s betrayal is the one that cuts him the most deeply. keefe’s hurts, sure, but i could argue it’s for love triangle related reasons, more than their supposed friendship instead. (i will, actually. that’s a part of the love triangle analysis - and if you think this is long...) but nothing is really earth shattering in the sense that it deeply warps his sense of identity. he’s been hurt a lot, and he’s a traumatized kid, but he reacts with less maturity than his younger sister - and a lot of the other (younger) characters at times, which can be frustrating to see when the solution is right there.

and here we are. the most painful scene for me to read - and i haven’t even gotten around to rereading legacy yet. so. legacy spoilers ahead.

this is my warning - i’m not cutting fitz as much slack for these scenes even if i understand where he’s coming from. he’s wrong. it’s as simple as that, and i *will* explain why, but if you still believe sophie and fitz should have ended up together and plan on reminding me of that, i respect you, but please just stop reading here. 

for context, this is right after sophie finds out that oralie is her genetic mom and fitz is waiting at havenfield and tries to guess why she’s so upset. or that she’s figured out who her parents are. it becomes apparent shortly that even he doesn’t know which he’s doing.

“I get why you’re not ready to talk about it YET.”

this is supposed to be a small sentence to show how understanding he is, and it would be, if it wasn’t for the glaring YET at the end. he still expects sophie to talk about the subject sometime, and with him. but it’s weird that he’d be so relieved about it - considering how UPSET sophie is at the moment.

i tried, you guys, i really did. did i mention i was a hardcore sophitz shipper when i first started the series? only the first three books were out and i was in middle school minding my own business and even got through exile mad at fitz but hopeful. 

it was my second readthrough before neverseen dropped that had me, you know, rethinking things. and now, at 19 (yeah okay that makes me sound old but you know the books have been out for a while now so), it’s easy to see why. sophitz is every little kid’s dream come true. your crush likes you back and it’s all as magical as you thought it would be. except it isn’t, because we tend to only see the good in people we like. sokeefe is the slow burn because it takes time to build up to a relationship and it’s not going to how you think it will. 

I DIGRESS. this next excerpt is where i get really upset because fitz just does not listen. he pushes and he pushes and he pushes and god, you would think he’d get it. 

things he gets points for: not lashing out at her immediately and holding back on his anger

things he does not get points for: well, you’ve read the scene too, right?

sophie says it best: he. just. wasn’t. listening. 

and he also takes it upon himself to decide for her, who it is, even though sophie is clearly so very painfully obviously distressed. i mean, for anyone in his position, this is a major jerk move, but you know, it’s fitz, so he’s going to keep it perfect. 

and just when we think he’s finally understood, just as i was thinking he’s getting better at reading situations, he brings up the matchmaking thing. 

y’all, he acts like her not being matchmakable is a problem for both of them, even though it technically doesn’t affect her the way it affects him. she’s said it herself, that she has reservations about the whole thing, and it’s not even something she considers her future to be. 

“you don’t want it either - you know you don’t.”

they might both be telepaths, but fitz projects himself onto sophie a lot because of that. it gets worse after they become cognates because it’s an even greater honor and they’re doing it together. 

but they’re not the same. nowhere near it. it’s this scene that made me realize that fitz hasn’t been seeing sophie - he’s been seeing her potential and everything she could be, and that’s why he’s so fixated on the matchmaking lists. of course, matching with the most powerful elf the lost cities has ever known would restore his family name. it would be perfect, really, the most powerful elf and the second most powerful telepath the lost cities have ever known, matched together. 

i could say more about him claiming that sophie’s privacy is less important than her future, as if the two aren’t one in the same, but i’d like to overlook that and pretend it’s just his entitlement and his view of matchmaking as the be all end all creeping in and nothing more.

so.

that was a lie.

“I… don’t think you’ve thought this through. But of course you haven’t. It’s late. You’ve had a long day with lots of huge stuff. So… can we just agree to not make any decisions right now?”

the way he’s so sure she hasn’t thought this through is a double edged sword. not only does it show a kind of possessive edge over her, where he’s constantly speaking for her and OVER her, it also shows us how he’s convinced it’s still about him.

fitz. my buddy. my man. listen to the girl.

he doesn’t bother giving her reasoning a chance and steamrolls ahead with his own, which we know sophie hates anyone doing. i mean, look at her argument with keefe in nightfall - she’s not going to stand for people speaking over her or for her. she doesn’t want their protection.

what’s wrong with this scene is that fitz writes off everything sophie is feeling and saying, and the key word here is ruin.

ruin.

instead of being understanding to sophie’s upbringing and her unique situation, he can’t look past his own return of the king (a lotr reference, shannon would you be proud even if i’m slandering your character?) to elven society. in fact, it says a lot that he sees her as the vacker redemption arc even when sophie herself has mentioned - to us and to HIM - that she doesn’t feel like she fits in with elven society but only if she plays by his rules. 

(feels a little like objectification, ngl, and that doesn’t sit right with me.)

he’s blinded by his status, his pride, and perfection, and that, right there, is his biggest downfall.

not the conclusion gif i was looking for but y’all this is long enough let me keep this brief.

(HAHA YOU THOUGHT i am incapable of being brief)

fitz is an incredibly consistent character when we get down to it, and he’s not as complex-ified as the other characters are. well, not the way the other characters are. biana’s arc is about improving as a person and getting stronger, dex’s is about overcoming internalized prejudice, keefe’s is about chosen family and trauma, etc. fitz’s character arc is almost backwards - from a writing standpoint, this would be a really cool villain origin story. not that fitz is a villain, but over time, rather than his character becoming a better person, he starts out perfect until that perfection crumbles and we get to see the perfectionist that so desperately craves a return to his old normal, with everyone in this new normal. he’s trying so hard to fit into old clothes, outgrown shoes, and slip back into his old memories. 

as a love interest, no. i could go further about his “interest” in linh being driven by her same power, but i have no doubt that matchmaking would still be of great interest to him, so i’ll leave it at that.

I DONT HATE FITZ. not as a person, nor as a character. i don’t see him as the most likable, but you guys, he’s not a villain. he’s a teenage boy who needs to work through his issues before he gets anywhere near sophie, but he’s been through a lot so i’m trying to cut him some slack. he’s an incredible asset to the kotlc team and his need for a plan tends to keep them from getting themselves in more trouble. he’s helped sophie improve her abilities vastly, and indirectly, pushed her to become better. quite literally, the story would not exist without him. we need fitz as a character because he makes the story what it is, but as an individual i just think we wouldn’t get along.

-k

(any questions are appreciated and i would love to have some canon discourse! i know in the quest for more diversity in the kotlc characters, discourse tends towards that, understandably, but i do believe there’s a lot to be uncovered in canon and i would love to talk about it more! yes, more than 3,219+ words about it LOL)

[t-he-art-of-beauty]

so. doctor who thoughts? doctor who thoughts.

I was leak-spoilered against my will, at least super vaguely, and I gotta say I was worried. Because I am a sucker for traumatic painful catharsis. For sobbing and not feeling okay. For having to sacrifice something I love for the story to go on. And I was worried it would be too meta or too obviously based on out-of-universe/out-of-story decisions and pull me out of the story.

but I have to say despite going into it a little bit apprehensively I came out of it wholeheartedly having enjoyed it. It was really really well executed. It was fun! I teared up, I giggled, I was scared and tense. Despite having been spoilered I believed and felt the intensity of the moment where fourteen gets hit by that beam, David’s performance dragged me with it into this moment hitting despite knowing it likely wouldn’t last. His confusion and realization hit. And Fifteen comforting him like that? Unmade me. I’m here now. It’s okay.

I really think there’s a lot to what I’ve seen others write about: With RTD’s life experiences his interest in and perspectives on the kinds of stories he wants to tell might have shifted. Nine and Ten explored trauma and repression and always running and the myriad of “I’m fines” in such visceral ways. Now, throughout the specials, we got Donna calling it out over and over again. Trying to reach him, trying to make him stop. Fourteen, already much softer and more expressive, still running, and yet more glimpses of confronting the weight of it all and what that means for him. And now, this. Healing, as a central theme, this explicitly.

I’m still unsure about the actual bigeneration mechanics and I wonder if (and hope) it’s going to be explained more. Does Fifteen have all the memories of Fourteen healing and resting and retiring and that’s the reason why he’s so integrated and carefree and light now? Is it basically a “preemptive regeneration” so the Doctor can keep on chugging along and saving the world? Did the Doctor split off the regeneration that was suffering the worst under the trauma (subtitles post bigeneration referring to Tennant!Doctor as Ten?) And basically excised the pain as a separate regeneration who gets to retire now?

I’m not sure what I actually want here. I’m trying not to want anything, because I want to like this story and continue liking it and knowing myself the best way to get there is to trust that it will take me somewhere and go with the flow.

I have to say though, I am still. Very much. A sucker for trauma and pain and whump, so there is a slight worry that Fifteen will not feel like a continuation of that post-time-war NuWho legacy that I latched onto with the show, as someone who doesn’t really know ClassicWho. But I also love love love Ncuti and his energy and charm and presence I could see in this episode so maybe it’s time to rearrange my expectations for where this will go and open myself up to falling in love with a very different kind of character. Who knows what will happen. Who knows how this character will look back onto and relate to the memories and experiences he has integrated and healed from. I mean that’s the thing about trauma, it never truly gets to the point of “as if it never happened”, it changes you and the healing from it does just as well. I’m sure RTD knows that, I hope it will be acknowledged and addressed, but even if it isn’t I think I’m open to see where it goes right now.

Because even if NuNuWho stops satisfying my doctor-specific hunger for whump and associated hurt(/comfort), with the slate of queer talent in front of and behind the camera and the commitment to be political RTD has already shown (even if he’s fumbling in slightly strange ways here and there) it might just start feeding a very different kind of hunger. NCUTI SAVE ME NCUTI. well.

[jikookuntold]

Hi! I appreciate your takes a lot, please can you share your opinion about this situation. Hope you saw Jungkook last Wlive which he did between Friday-Saturday night, at 2-3 am. Jungkook said there “I don’t have nothing to do to tomorrow. I will just work out tomorrow” then we know that JK spend Friday night before this Wlive at musicals with Tae and Wooga, and later on Saturday night he spent bowling with Tae. Two nights in a row he chose to spend with Tae. Ok. Whatever. Maybe Jimin was busy, right? But no, today Jimin said this: “ it would have been great if all the members could go together, but because we all busy with our individual work. But I'm still in the middle of preparations so I had time (other translation says *spare days*) in those few days after various film shoots and it happened to be on a weekend and Hoseokie-hyung also had a day off, so we went together.” So I have many questions here and confusion. Their stories contradict themselves, JK said he was totally free on Saturday, while JM said other members were so busy they couldn’t join even if he wished. I think JiHope visited Jin in the early afternoon, while JK fall asleep early in the morning (he woke up at 8 again, said he was tired and would want to sleep some more, it’s unknown if JK slept more). Soooo there’s several questions, and to be honest they don’t advantage jikook much. Just from following the situation: Jimin isn’t updated to JK’s life and didn’t know he was free that day? Or Jimin just didn’t contact JK and didn’t invite him for some reason? Or he lied that all other members had working schedule that day so others would look good in public eyes that they didn’t join? On the other hand. Did Jungkook just declined to go to JIn because he had something more important that day (bowling with Tae and and before spending morning on Wlive just chilling and doing nothing)? Or JK was just not invited by Jimin? And then again I don’t think JK lied that he was free on Saturday, he or Tae decided to spend lovely night bowling together. He was definitely free I think. So the following question is the most important one that bothers me: Why would a couple chose to spend their precious day off completely separately with different people? And that happened when finally their schedule would align (after one partner was busy with job), they what didn’t miss each other…plus while one of them doesn’t know the other one was free, and the other one was spending two days in a row with the same person, prioritizing that friend over his allegedly lover…how does it make sense? Maybe I missed something and didn’t understand it and drew some incorrect conclusions, and you would be kind enough to say where my logic lacks because honestly …it is confusing

ps sorry if i double posted, I didn’t understand if it was sent or the site dropped

Your confusion and the essay you made out of it comes from a little mistake in calculations. You forgot that waking hours for a normal grown up human being is at least 16 hours per day, and they can do multiple activities at the same day, like having schedules (not necessarily Hybe-related things), working out or going to musicals, or bowling or eating outside, and still having spare time left. And the bowling didn't happen last Saturday, the photos are from November.

Also you forgot that boot camps don't accept visitors at night, so what if Jimin wasn't lying or covering for anything and JK actually had important business during the day? Or JK just had things to do but didn't want to spoil and just said he will work out?

You see? There is no need for overanalysing or writing essays or calling anyone liar or calling a resurfaced friendly hang out from four months ago "lovely". Just chill ❤️

[libra-stellium]

Personal Zodiacal Releasing - My coming of age???

ZR story from when I was 18 which I think literally shows me “growing up.” Based on my lot of courage and lot of necessity, which are both in Leo.

I started a new L1 on June 17, 2014 and I feel like that started the time in my life where I was facing my first serious situations and making my own decisions and being like okay I need to take my independence.

All this revolves around me getting run over by a car (that my aunt was driving) that summer!! I survived with a small fracture on my leg so it’s all good LOL

L4♋️ May 22 2014 (Cool down period) - I found an email from the IB program director at my high school and the attachment was a profile/testimonial thing for the IB program just saying that I got my diploma and how it helped me in college. I graduated high school June 2013. I’m also pretty sure this is the last thing high school related that happened to me

L4♋️ June 11 2014 (LB) (Cool down period) - my aunt runs me over bc her car hydroplanes as she’s picking me up in front of my driving school in the rain lol to set the scene the driving school has a glass wall and glass door in the front so my whole class, the instructor and the front desk in the lobby area watched this happen 😭 The driving school instructor didn’t know what to say when I came to class the next week 😂

L1♍️ June 17 2014 (Peak period) - I can’t find anything specific to this day but since my driving class was from 6/9-6/20 I think that’s probably the day I went back. I remember having to make up a couple missed classes

From 6/26 to 8/7 I traveled to Haiti while my leg was recovering.

L4♓️ July 11 2014 (Major peak period)- I found an email where I was saying that I could bend my leg and cross it and I was going to carnival later in the month

L4♓️ July 31 2014 (LB) (Major peak period) - I didn’t find anything for this date but I posted on Instagram on 7/30 saying I had fun at carnival on 7/29 and I remember not wearing by leg brace for it because I felt better

L4♓️ August 25 2014 (Major peak period) - Two days before this I have an email from Geico asking for documents relating to my claim bc at that point I think I had already been cleared by the doctor and I moved back on campus 3 days after to start my sophomore year

L4♉️ September 18 2014 - I called geico because they needed to ask me questions and I ended up arguing with them bc they were about to not pay me anything bc it was my aunt driving the car and I had to say how I’m 18 and she’s no longer my legal guardian and what they’re saying isn’t even in her policy. Which I think took a lot of courage!!

L4♋️ September 24 2014 (Cool down period) - they send me the settlement offer and it’s 3x what they tried to make me take before the phone call and I accept that! There was another L4♋️ on July 22 2014 which idk if it's the completion of the LB period I started with since it got cut off by me starting a new L1 period. Either way I have no idea what happened that day.

September 25 2014 - I turn 19!

L4♈️ October 20 2014 - I open my first bank account! Not part of an LB cycle but Aries is my 2H!

What I realized about the L1 sign change is that it was necessary for me to separate myself from my aunt and “become an adult” basically! I’m a pisces rising with 8H libra placements and my family has used money and favors a lot as a form of control. I found an email from May 2014 where I was asking her for permission to go to a concert and 28yr old me is like why??? You’re 18!! And I went to the concert in August 2014 after the L1 change and me and my friend I went with still talk about it because my aunt gave us a ride and it was sooooo stressful to coordinate and she was yelling during the ride. I remember thinking this is the last time I ask for anything! Even during the phone call with Geico I was asserting myself as an adult! And when I got the settlement money my family took 50% of it (after medical expenses) and used it for family costs including a funeral. My aunt even said the accident was necessary because the money was a gift from god lollll I’ve been managing my own money since I opened that bank account! No one in my family knows how much I have or how much I make and I'm gonna keep it that way!

Also the fact that I received the settlement check right after starting an 8H year 🤯 I love astrology lol

I'm still trying to figure out how to interpret ZR things that are coming up instead of using it to reflect on the past! Idk why but I feel like for me the peak periods are not peaking??? Wym I got run over by a car during a cool down period??? But my major peak period is my leg healing?? loll I feel like it should be the other way around.

[midnightexpressproductions]

An announcement and a thank you.

Oof, it’s been quite some time since I last posted something, huh? I can't believe it's been almost half a year since I last updated anything. My sincerest apologies for disappearing so suddenly. I promise that this account isn’t dead. However, you might have noticed that all of my posts are gone.

Let me explain.

So not to go into too much detail but some stuff -personal and work related- came up in my life, which has made it super hard to continue writing and coding for Lazarus Syndrome. I’m finally in a better place (both mentally and emotionally) where I feel like I can get back into writing. However, it’s still hard for me to separate the emotions I’ve been dealing with from Lazarus Syndrome. After taking some time and putting it into serious consideration, I’ve finally come to the hard decision to put an indefinite hiatus on Lazarus Syndrome. I know some of you might be upset to hear that but right now, for my own mental health, I can’t continue working on it.  

That doesn’t mean that I’m quitting writing or deleting this account. I’ve missed writing and I’ve missed all of you lovelies! Even though Lazarus Syndrome is going to be put on the backburner for a while, I’ve got some other stuff planned that I’m excited to share with you all. 

Which brings us to the next part of this announcement. 

I’ve started a new project! Well, two actually. And they’re very near and dear to my heart. I’ve actually been working on them both ever since I was in junior high. And getting back into working on them the past two months has honestly been so refreshing. I feel like I'm finally writing for myself. I'm so excited to start writing again!

 The first project is a fantasy novel. I'll be working on that on the side and I might make a few updates on it here and there or answer any questions if they pop up but I’ll try to keep this account strictly for my IF projects.

The second project is a story that I’ve actually decided to rework into an IF. I just fell in love with all of the characters and the world is so expansive that I figured why not change things up? I'll be making more posts about that later on so keep an eye out for it.

Being mushy and sharing stuff like this is not something I’m used to but I just wanted to let all of you lovelies know what's been going on and what will happen in the future.

I also want to let all of you know that from the bottom of my heart, I’m truly grateful for all of your continued support. I treasure each and everyone of you guys.

[legendoftortor]

I would like to know more about your characters but I can’t think of anything specific to ask about

so tell me a fun fact about each of them

ahh tysm for asking about my mc’s 🥹 I’ve been wanting to make a longer separate post about each of them but work has kept me too busy lately! Will eventually get around to it but to answer your question (and elaborate just a tad on their backstories)…

Fun Facts about my MC’s 💜

Estelle Frye:

She was my first MC (and my only for many, many months!), so has the most detailed and fleshed out backstory by far. Her first name is inspired by the lead character from one of my favourite series of games (Trails in the Sky), but her nickname Este is also a subtle nod to Taylor Swift’s song ‘no body, no crime’.

I also decided to throw in a bit of a crossover with my last fandom by making her the daughter of the AC:Syndicate protagonist Jacob Frye.

With that in mind, her fun fact is that she is able to use Eagle Vision and was briefly trained as an assassin prior to starting at Hogwarts. She tends to prefer a stealthier approach to combat, even when using magic.

She is also the MC most inspired by my own appearance & personality, so much so that eventually I just decided to cheekily self-insert a much cooler version of myself as her mom (because technically I did create her, right? 😂)

Evie Morgan:

My newest MC, so I’m still solidifying her character and backstory so apologies if this one seems a bit bland compared with the rest!

She is a distant descendant of Isadora Morganach - I know it’s not implied that Isadora had any children or family other than her brother & father, but my imagination was hard at work with this one 🤭

Fun fact - She is the younger cousin of Elsie Morgan, one of the other students who compete in Imelda’s time trials. I’ve decided that Elsie is the captain of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team too, because why not?

Her name is also another gentle nod to AC: Syndicate (Evie Frye) - there’s a pattern emerging here 🤷🏻‍♀️

Leila Greene:

She is my one and only muggleborn MC (technically…will elaborate more on this in the future!). She’s quite artsy and has a green thumb, and I consider her to be my most cheerful & outgoing character by far.

Fun fact: Her mother is a lover of all things literature & poetry and named her after the characters in Lord Byron’s works ‘The Giaour’ and ‘Don Juan’.

She’s also technically the only MC whose name isn’t directly inspired in some way by another form of media - I only found out about the Lord Byron connection after choosing her name!

Thalia Blackwood:

Another MC whose first name was inspired by a favourite character of mine from the Percy Jackson series. She is a descendant of Eunon Blackwood, the creator of the hedge mazes that appear around the highlands, which technically also makes her distantly related to the Black family (again, imagination working overtime on this one!). She is completely unaware of this until she stumbles upon the mazes during her fifth year.

As for her fun fact, like her namesake, she is terribly afraid of heights, and Astronomy & Flying class are two of her least favourite classes for this very reason.

(Sorry that ended up being so long but am always happy to answer questions about my MC’s! ☺️)