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crazy-loca-blog · 4 years

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Personal thoughts on… 2020 releases (Part I)

Note: As the title says, these are just personal opinions on Choices books and chapters. Of course, you may agree or disagree with them, I only use this platform to express my thoughts on what I read every week.

So, I did this in 2019 and I had a blast doing it (you can see Part I, Part II, Part III and the Seasonal Books reviews), so I thought about repeating the experience because… why not? Of course, I had planned to post this during the holidays but my job barely let me some free time to eat and sleep. Better later than never, I guess.

In 2019, we read over 30 books and it was the busiest year for Pixelberry in terms of releases so far. During 2020, things changed A LOT. We didn’t have as many releases and the stories seemed to have a new focus, especially the romance ones. We said “goodbye” to the wedding books and welcomed some 30 diamond scenes that were at a whole new level. We also had many hiatuses and some books were so long that it seemed like we spent the whole year reading them.

This will be a three-part post and I will include current releases and books that were released during 2019 but were finished in 2020. The list is organized in alphabetical order, and it doesn’t include the VIP Books (as I’ll talk about them in a fourth post). The only books I will be skipping will be Desire & Decorum: First Winter and Bloodbound: Dark Solstice, as they’re seasonal books that I fully covered in the 2019 review.

America's Most Eligible: Wedding Edition (September 18, 2019 - January 22, 2020): As a person who really enjoyed the first AME book, I already thought it was unnecessary to have a second book. I mean… reality shows are repetitive, so why would we have two books that were exactly the same? Little did I know this series was so popular that we ended up having a third book with a wedding after dating our LI for like two months (because we did need another one last wedding book, right?). There were too many things that didn’t make sense to me. My MC never had a good relationship with Slater, so having him as part of my wedding party was annoying, I would have preferred to have Teagan on my side. Also, despite the fact that we finally got to know Ivy’s background and why she was so evil throughout the series, competing against her (and Vince) all over again was exhausting… I would have definitely preferred a normal wedding diary show or something like that. And last but not least, the fact that Jen was working on the show while being a competitor was so… I don’t think this is actually possible in a real TV show. But the award to the weirdest moment goes to what happened to those people who left their LI’s at the altar and married Bianca or Slater instead. Yeah, because after that super heartbreaking moment, Jen takes the MC, Adam, Derek and Mackenzie to the producer's room to watch some “never seen before” footage about their friendship throughout the series…. because of course… there is nothing weird about seeing your ex there, right after dumping them in the middle of the wedding. This series was good enough to deserve a way more decent ending. Baby Bump, Book 1 (December 9, 2019 - March 16, 2020): My overall impression about this book is “meh”. Even though a lot of people complained about how the pregnancy was shown, I think the writers did a pretty decent job. The experience is different for every woman, so I think that criticizing the focus the writers decided to give to our MC’s experience is just pointless and saying “it’s not realistic” is a little unfair. The same thing applies to the baby. A lot of people complained saying that the baby was “too big”. Guess what guys… that isn’t the actual baby, that’s just the cover of the book… if you buy the “baby basket”, you’ll get the right baby size throughout the story. As a personal opinion, I think the story has some good things (I really like the fact that it shows how hard is for pregnant women to get and to keep a job, even though the fact that the MC hid her pregnancy is very unprofessional, to say the least) but there are some things that make me feel uncomfortable. First of all… our gang. I like the characters as individuals, but when I look at them as a gang, the only thing that Luisa, Myles and Clint have in common is the MC… I don’t know what they’d talk about if they were in a room without her. There is also this very personal POV on dating Myles… I mean… maybe it’s just me, but it is kind of uncomfortable to see Myles dating a pregnant woman who actually got pregnant after a one night stand with the other guy in our gang (or with the only guy in the gang, if your Myles is a female). Baby Bump, Book 2 (November 20, 2020 - present): Well, if you collected every single piece of the blanket in Baby Bump Book 1, you already had little glimpses about this book. Our very pregnant woman not only discovered that she’s having twins, but she also has some new duties at the city hall. And even though there are some things about this book that still don’t convince me, I can see the efforts to make some improvements in the story. The fact that the plot is not only focused on the MC and her pregnancy, but also on Clint’s family issues, Myles’ reelection and the park not only are introducing us to new characters, but they’re also giving us plenty of material to make the story more dynamic and not only focused on one topic. I also like how the writers have been managing Cassandra’s arc of redemption. Despite her being the antagonist in the first book, you can tell she’s grown a lot as a character, to the point that she is willing to help our MC not because of her reputation, but because she genuinely seems to care. I don’t know if I expect a big plot twist coming in the next few chapters (and if it does, I guess it will be related to the MC’s health and the babies delivered earlier than expected) but even if it doesn’t, I can already tell this book is better than the first one. Blades Of Light And Shadow, Book 1 (January 29, 2020 - June 3, 2020): There is no doubt (at least not for me) that this was the best new release of 2020. We had been waiting for a new adventure book for a really long time, and PB delivered. Not only we had this super wide range of MCs to choose from, we had a book where our choices actually mattered. Because yes, you can buy every single diamond scene in this story and still, if you don’t make the right choices at the right moments, you won’t get all the skills at the end of it. And that’s probably what seduces me the most about this book. The characters in our gang are also very well written. Each one of them has a very different personality, they all have these very different backgrounds and burdens, but they still complement each other perfectly when it comes to work as a team. Now if I have to be completely honest about the plot, it took me a while to get into it, but I want to think it’s because I’m not very familiar with this type of stories, because it’s very clear that there aren’t any writing problems in it. However, if I have to criticize one thing, it has to be some people’s reaction: because yes, it seems like some people didn’t get the memo that this wasn’t a romance book and I must admit it disappointed me a little to see that most of the discussions were focused in the romance part instead of talking about the adventure itself. Bloodbound, Book 3 (November 9, 2019 - March 28, 2020): Last year, I already mentioned how happy I was with this book, especially because most of the times, the third book in a series is not as popular as the previous ones. We sometimes have that problem of writers dragging plots because they have nothing new to add and us, the readers, struggling to finish the story (because of course, after reading 2 books, no one gives up on reading the third one). Well, I still think this book is nothing but impressive. As a person who’s not into vampires at all, I can safely say this is the book that I enjoyed the most in the series. Even though I didn’t feel huge changes in our LIs, I loved the evolution of our MC when compared to the first book (her character development itself deserves a whole post) and even though there were some things that seemed predictable, there were some others that were completely unexpected. If I had to change something, I’d say we deserved two endings, the one that we had and a darker one, I think PB truly missed an opportunity there. But overall, I think the story came full circle. This is definitely one of my favorite releases in 2020. Distant Shores (April 3, 2020 - July 17, 2020): This book gives me all the “Nighbound” vibes. That is, it is a good story, it is well written, the plot is attractive and overall it was well received by the fandom; however, that’s not enough for it to get a second book (or in PB’s words, “it’s not as popular and profitable as we think”). I personally enjoyed the story, but I didn’t fall in love with it. My biggest complaint is that I kept constantly waiting for some HUGE plot twist, I did need that “I didn’t see that coming” moment to blow our minds… but that never happened and I ended up feeling that PB wasted a story that could have shown us one adventure after another and turned it into something “plain”. Also, even though we had a badass MC, three awesome LIs and an amazing crew, by the time I pressed the “End book” button, I felt I had more questions than answers… and I absolutely hate it when that happens. We never got a chance to know anything about Robert’s story, his background and how he managed to survive and go back and forth between the past and the present. Or we never knew what made him and our MC so special and why the compass helped them to time travel. I can definitely see the potential for a second (and even a third) book, it’s sad to know it won’t be happening.

#playchoices #choices stories you play #americas most eligible #americas most eligible 3 #americas most eligible 2 #ame #baby bump #baby bump 2 #babu #blades of light and shadow #blades #bolas #BloodBound #bloodbound 3 #Distant Shores

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blushdressshop · 4 years

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God Made Scots A Wee Bit Better T-Shirt

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he’s done by Valkyrie who remember is now a drunk who scavenges stuffand she brings into the Grand Master this very weird eccentric guy whose brother is actually the collector from earlier he runs in arena gladiator fighting thing on this planetand the whole becomes his number one champion over the next two years Houck fights in the arena learn some basic speech becomes closer Valkyrieand overall is really just loving life after all this store still weirded out positionsand goes up to look for the infinity stones goes around the universe for two years looking for them which for the record is a marvel one shot I would love to see but is completely unsuccessful the managers back on earth now set up base in New Yorkand move away from ledgers tower with this big new fancy facilityand Blackwood are going train scarlet which falcon war machineand vision to become real avengers why the indestructible laser shooting hyper intelligent robotic in the Thor’s hammer needs training I’m not entirely sure on Tony’s also there but he’s a little preoccupied with the relationship problems he’s now having with pepper which leads to them taking a break while in space status is getting real sick of everyone failing to get his stones so he decides he’s gonna do it himselfand by that I mean he’s going to wait three years to do it but he start planning now which most in getting a bigger glove called the infinity gauntlet that would let them hold the stones once he finds them unearthed the shield team gets to the human campand shield was to register all been humans on a big list so they’re all accounted for something like a human’s version of the Scobee Accords which will get you over the humans at the camp predictably don’t like this also people start realizing that Daisy’s mom is kind of evil so a big fight ensues in the war which is really more of a battle between shielding humans he follows his nonskilled anklesand loses his arm also those chargingand human crystalsand up in the oceanand spend the pillsand also to stuff so now in human start popping up moreand more around the world also Mays ex husband Garner egrets in humidified enter into this horrible monster called flash also grant one was to try to start by Dragon even though the avengers just fishing that Daisy also says about her dad who wasn’t such a bad guy after all he gets his memory erasedand start a new life may decides to take a break from shieldand Fitzsimmons finally start dating however risingand going Simmons is in the same room as the monolith which shield has occasional memory that’s the portal through which you go to this terrible ugly planet with an original inhuman monster hive lives she was the inspiration for Hydra away quick positive video here I really hope it doesn’t feel like I’m talking down you guys by saying in case your memberand that’s her stuff a lot I genuinely does make this as easy to followand not confusing as possible is especially for people who are defense of the stuff that haven’t washed all this already of this information is slightly hard to keep track of you a second thatand gets into that placeand he said last night was abandoned there a long time ago they become friendsand survive together after many years of service Frank S returns home to his family from his militaryand shady servers daysand it’s super niceand emotional however around this timeand Cerberus leaks with Cerberus was actually about including the video that it is a guiding shot to this guy called David whose nickname micro will be back in a sec agent orange transfer for doing this because he’s not a big fan of Frank’sand so with the help of the Cerberus squad including Frank supposed best friend Billy Russo he sets up a three way gunfight between three gangs in a park to kill Frankand his family Frank’s wifeand children are brutally murderedand Frankish on the head but survives after this Frank is enragedand devastated answer decides take matters into his own hands he uses his military trainingand pure anger to hunt downand kill everyone in the gangs involved with his family’s death he does this under the vigilante guys of the punisher first just make a plan though so that takes a little time now micro is a hackerand NSA analyst these to help a Daisy when she was working as a hacker’s analysis info that Cerberus doing legal stuffand he starts leaking it so agent orange triesand killed his men shoot microand think they killand really the bullet his phoneand so survived because phones are bulletproof in this world Michael doesn’t hidingand pretends to be dead even from his wifeand kids who he watches from security cameras Scott Lange has finally finished serving his time in prison for his crime that really was not badand is released going to stay with his old cellmateand pal Luis he wants to see his daughter but his life is moved on to another guyand so that’s difficult in its with Luis his new friends Kurtand Daveand try to get a job at Baskin Robbins but Baskin Robbins always finds out tech is having run by Darren cross hang pencil protégé along with Hank’s daughter hope while Hank is on the world they some old tales of Hank’sand process about his own version of the suit called the yellowjacket only this one is way deadlierand fliesand shoots lasers cross also plans to sell this tech to Hydraand the 10 ringsand just the worst people thanks not too happy about thisand try to think of a plan to stopand even where Scott Lange ever since the very public Vista quick job I think Scott could be a good choice to take on the object stuff before gets into the wrong hands through a series of people think it’s got a tip about as mentioned Rob Casillas to see how good Scott really is what Scott eventually does only to find the entrance to he takes it tries it onand is terrified by the experience Hank is impressed with the skill cc but when Scott tries to return the suit he’s caught by the policeand cost breakdown in jailand tells of his pregnant with cross help is not awfully happy with how things are developing as she was to wear the MS student takedown cross but Hank does a letter because of how her mother died all those years ago so they trained Scott until he becomes great at the shrink tricky stuff even to friendsand called Anthony very good Scott also starts to get romantically involved with hopeand Hank reveals to help our mom diedand she is all well I totally understandand forgive you know dad even though you really could is only sooner I’m an adult you know they’re good now Scott needs advice from an old avenger space to steal the yellowjacket suit is there only to discover that it’s been renovatedand it’s now the new venture space is not by falcon who fights in man is defeated but also impressed by Scott’s abilitiesand less just called Scott’s good fortune that it wasn’t patient who was on patrol that day also by the way crosses going crazy because pen particles mess with the brain after all this Scott goes in to steal the yellowjacket suit but gets caught so him across FIFO while in a helicopterand then a briefcaseand in Scott’s daughter’s room to save his daughterand kill cross Scott go subatomicand saves the day but is temporarily trapped in the quantum realm where Hank’s wife Janet was left however he manages to get outand it’s all good after all this Hank believes that hope is finally ready to become a heroand so gives her the lost barber Scott is back his familyand his daughter Anna’s dosing hopeand never once happy now go back to the moon real quick a place we haven’t been for a while where the go inhumanand potentially the most unlikable character in this entire universeand human arguing about this American flag I am only mentioning this to see him forget that there’s an entire inhuman civilization just living on the moon while all this is happening back on earth the tomb salvaging company shows up in the area were scurvy’s to beand picks up small font Exceland some of this ends up in the hands of Hydra uses it to build a giant robot called ultimo but the manager show up at least those are leftand defeated now were getting into the Netflix world for a while first off Jessica Jones gets new job from Joy Meacham the sister of one Meacham was running red Enterprises will be manipulate it by’s dad was being controlled by the hand I give it a second to sink in again anyway she is Jessica to investigate the people around so she can blackmail them later if need be also Wilson Fisk is stilland by his he I mean jail because he such a big crime boss he start making connections there that Frank Castle has finally gotten all the resources he needs to kill the gangs he thinks were solely responsible for his family’s murder so starts going around doing that in the most brutal way possible starting with the Irish Mafiaand a gang called the dogs of hell is all happening in or near Hells kitchenand that Murdoch starts noticing the stuff so he starts investigating eventually as daredevil in a newand improved suit by the way he comes face to face of the punisher which ends with a bullet to the face that is seriously injured but survives fighting keep fighting that the vigilante stuff while Cassidy is going around the city killing pedophiles in such an entry castle manages to kidnap daredevil Jenny into a chimney where they learn about each other’s pastsand ideologies Castle takes a gun to daredevil’s hand pulse of the criminaland hasn’t had to shoot the criminal or he’s can do it because castle things killing your enemies is the way to go hello I thought a lot of the people daredevil Scott daredevil to try to kill anyway daredevil breaks outand has to fight through some angry bikers Castle unleashes on them later on Frank it’s kidnap by the Irish who brutally tortured him but eventually he gets out with their troubles help explain the situationand himand daredevil cool now but that is arrested that the craziness is now over but nope just now Electra shows up his old girlfriend then ninjaand potentially secret weapon for the handand she’s like a let’s find together because I see her doing that nowand so they do if I think he was a mainly with franking space to Karen what happened to his familyand the bondand become best is so daredeviland Electra are going around fighting the accuserand ultimately come across this giant pit the hand is digging in order to get Dragon bonesand to become immortal that still going on their tax by handand just until state shows up to save the day meanwhile on the lower side of things the punisher trial happensand during that Frank saw like an Angus into jail where he meets Wilson Fisk Fisk is like Frank nothings working everything but my biggest rival this person helped kill your family soand Frank Sykes say no more so he takes a that guy that this double crossesand try seven killed by Frank is just too good for that so Fisk lets them goand Frank tells Fisk to kill him when if he sees them again Frank it’s a geland mean wild animals like snow but again then ninja he thought he go before was brought back by the hand also their little kids being drained of their blood also for resurrection purposes through similar shenanigans the punisher keeps going around killing guys involved with his family’s murderand I will still have conflicting ideologiesand punish ends up killing an old Marine buddy of his Electra stick have a falling outand cystic trust tablets are killedand she didn’t like that so she tries to kill him will saves the dayand sticks kidnapped by the hand so Matt goesand save steak but while he’s doing that nobody reveals that Electra is a black skyand should be leading the hand she almost does but ends up joining their double insteadand the five images together real lasted I’m on right there after a hostage situationand Electra go up against like an infinite supply of hingesand Electra ends up sacrificing yourself for daredevil the punisher also shows up at the last minute to get daredeviland assist which is a pretty awesome moment not to lie no booze killed for real this time by stickand the good guys win except the hand takes Electra’s bodyand uses their Dragon magic to bring her back to life so she can work for them one of the five leaders of the hand the main one Alexandra comes to oversee her resurrection fog equatesand hours for Hogarth from Jessica Jones reveals he’s daredevil to Karenand the punisher goes off to kill everyone was involved with his family’s murder micro also wants answers about the whole Cerberus thing as a goes into Frank’s houseand puts the disk there with the video on it Castle’s unit in Afghanistan tortureand killing that innocent guy which Frank findsand takes with them tiny little break from the granite stuff here a witch just straight up which shows up in Londonand steals a magical artifact called the dark scepter however long case aliasand more masters of the Mystic arts show upand stop her a reminder that there’s magic in this world back to the streets now the gauge is now working at Pops barbershopand I know people disagree on what years these Netflix shows in particular take placeand they are confusing but based on the research I did this seems to check out anyway Luke also works of the barand one evening because he such a player he starts floating with detective Misty Knight the club Lucas working is also my cottonmouth now is a big shot crime boss’s cousin Mariah is a City Councilmanand is also pretty shady just more low key than enough strike is a hammer check from Justin Hammer for some good money but the operation goes wrong look secret half brother Willa striker is also involved here at the highest level is a big criminal now is now called diamondbackand is cottonmouth’s boss basicallyand so he sends in his body shades to make sure everything is running smoothly godmother still cool because these be friends back in the day but because the guy because the deal to go wrong is involved with pop one of cotton’s goons goes against disordersand shoots at the barbershop killing pop through this link in contrast to fightingand looks all like I really care for but not my radar so stop doing illegal stuffand calmness like know so we can start messing up his operation Luke also teams up with Claire Temple daredevil hotel buffet crimeand start a romance energy gets his hands on some bullets I can actually penetrate Luke’s impenetrable scan forand use them thoughand up having an argumentand so she murders him with a mic standand because the new big crime boss with shades help diamondback decides to team up with their setting out a plan to run the crime will do Harlem well Mariah does all the boring political stuff diamondback also shoots a cage twice with those magic bulletsand reveals that he’s actually his brother Claire takes her to the doctor who originated the experiment on themand they send an asset or boiling water something painfuland basically he’s restored to full strength while diamondbackand Mariah are running like a spear campaign against the cage to turn the people filed against them they do this through politicsand super shock loves Lucas backand FaceTime back in the police eventually diamondback shows up in a terrible super suitand even the punch each other for a bit is the end against diamondback partly with helping New York Spiderman style despite all his heroicsand proving himself a good guide to the policeand the people Harlem Lucasand back to prison because been discovered as Carl Lucas back in the day with your call despite being innocent broke out of prisonand so still needs to service time however one of Luke’s barbershop friends is a file that proves his innocence so he’s getting out soon also diamondback is taking them but I doctor who did this experienceand Luke so he’ll probably have some modifications the next time we see them there is a little bummed out that Luke is in jailand that they can’t get a cup of coffee for a while but she keeps itself occupied by starting martial arts training with help from Colleen way that martial artist to statically buy land but doesn’t really know that the hand is evil a bunch of little stuff happens here now firstly that kid who Iron Man said a while back Peter Parker is bitten by a radioactive spider which gives in special abilities like superstrength the ability to climb the wallsand having a dead uncle because he’s a genius kid he also designs web shooters that shoot superstrong webs also because he’s a good kid he realizes if you help people using his new powers he’s responsible for one bad stuff happens so he designs a pajama looking costume takes a living Spidermanand starts fighting little crimes in Queens now over with the Masters of the Mystic arts page 1and Margot find a group called the Dragon Raiders just FYI also falcon is still pretty impressed by thatand I guys a while back I think she could be a valuable asset to the team so he finds a way to contact with them through Luis about potentially joining the avengers Scots like well I cannot stay with my daughter right now but if you really need me yes give me a call we had about the shield team in a while but they’re still doing stuff around these husband Andrew turned into an inhuman call mile he did that is now a giant monster whose sole purpose really is to hunt other humans with humans popping up around the world now shields main mission objective is protecting in humansand training them is made harder because the government treats a group called the ATC you which is designed to track down superpowered people like humansand take them then basically they’re designed to replace yield now that shield has had to go underground in the ATC you is this guy called Malik once again is a big secret Hydra guy said he thought we were done with Hydra you were sorely mistaken the reason this ATC you exists is so Hydra can get a hold of all these in humansand use them you guessed it to make a super soldier army is not getting that seriously 99 of Hydra’s plans so shield in the ATC are fighting for to try to get Simmons off at alien planet which eventually doesand what is still working on rebuilding Hydra I guess Marilyn Stucker’s weightless cool son Werner to join him in a nutshell the main thing is shield us to start up a team of humans the inhuman hunting monster is out there going after them thing of lash is like a less strong or cool version of the book he changes in this monster at different times Olson is asking pretty close to one of the higher ups at the ATC you who isn’t actually evil but then worksheets are in the throat cycles is like I just have to crush discussed just Hydra also wants to get to the matter because they want to bring Benjamin back because they think will be a big secret weapon for them so word fits in Colson end up on an alien planetand cousins like mandatory wordand he crushes Ward’s chest with his robot handand then goes back to think that’s the end of Ward but then the superpowerful clinical human eye possesses corpseand then makes its way back to earth I was now leading Hydra through Ward’s bodyand he’s observing people for strengthand you know typical evil villain stuff so that any rent is still in and now going to basket CCI festand that’s what the iron fist does ever he starts missing homeand gets bored because he’s kind of a spoiled brat so just ramp runs away when the pass is open his eyes to go back to New York to take packs company because that’s I think it works because he’s also kind of a thundering dumbass doesn’t work focuses old friends join Ward Meacham if it were just go with it think is a crazy homeless person understandably wards think that that Harold is still kind of running the company while being controlled by the hand which he started to get kinda sick of becomes friends with Colleen at the dojo he also meets Claire Temple bananas put in a mental hospital he breaks out there with the power of the iron fist stocking 30 with Colleenand Bruce’s friends that it actually is an is coming back with the help of Jerry Hogarth he kinda sucks a business though because he’s been living among city in another dimension for the past decade ends of meeting Harold whose IK we should work together can sometimes take a controlling me so you can go kill themand I like gathers the main purpose in life I had to hand them gal the hand is still selling heroinand Denny’s unhappy about that science of beating herand agreeing to a series of challenges the loser has to pack upand get out of the city anyways but Manga breaks the promise but she’s got ancient society superpowers so there’s not much you can do about it Danny keeps consistently sucking a ring’s company so he’s married now by the board along with the Meacham’s words also super pissed at is that Harold is he took all of his money so he tells Harold bio comes back thanks to the hand Danny Colleenand Claire go to Chinaand take them gal realizes that Ward killed him so he frames them for drug possessionand so Ward gets locked up in the asylum Harold of its joy to be his new number two Danny also made potato Colleen so teacher was also secretly when the 5 m of the handand find out about thisand is in the fan now this guy called divers who isn’t that Dallas is days old friend from and he shows up to help Dannyand Colleen Joyce into saying that the hand probably his neck in the end after helping Dallas is like take the path to come on is open right nowand you’re supposed regarding it what the hell manand I was like well you know is boringand decides to team up with Haroldand joy to take on handand the Kudo but the kudos now working with wordand long story short is defeated but runs away Dallas is not a Danny but they work it out kind of data gets frame for drug stuffand goes in the runand Harold is the bag on the endand tries to take over the company Danny Lord in the big final battle team up kill Haroldand burn his corpse so he will come back to life now Ward is running the companyand Dallas teams of joyand maybe not out to kill Danny down the lineand then sends a team led by lecture to come on which again has no iron fist protecting it they kill a bunch of the monks there it’s pretty brutal the entrance is then close for safety so no one knows when it’ll open up again because back to check out the passand find the city is goneand some abilityand he realizes he probably should state to protect it also Luke Cage sends Claire letter from prison because there still thing overand cover Taj at this point Casillas is starting to get kinda pissed with Angel on it if you like his training isn’t getting him what he wants to start having some friction with most the Masters there also finds out that the angel on his drawing power from the dark dimension which he thinks is pretty have a critical because he must use the dark dimension to see his dead family againand to gain immortality but the angeland told him no because a bunch of people that the ancient one is withholding informationand they should bring tomato from the dark dimension to earth to golf it in eternity forms to rise up against the ancient one they break into the libraryand cover tiesand steal some pages from the ageless book about the dark dimension one tries to stop them but they get away in the end one point Rogers well the shielding goes to Mexicoand meets the human called yo yo who has superspeed who eventually joins the ranksand eventually becomes next girlfriend also Bobby Hunter leave the team because they were so staff spent off but that didn’t happen somewhere venturesand Sue Shield has an inhuman team but highest the inhuman Hydra God takes control of Daisy’s mind because he can do thatand turns against the team just as a vision of the future where one of them diesand other important detail there’s this group called the watchdogs which is basically inhuman racist who are going around killing humans as they plan by the way is to make every human in the worldand in human goes against Dr Ratcliff a scientist who he thinks can help them re create the original Cree experiment that native humans in the first place he realizes he needs actual Cree blood to do it so he sends a signal to the Creed to get some to come downand they do in a fight ensues they’re both taken out but also rendered useless however some Cree blood from daisies used from when she was saved without original Cree corpse long story doesn’t really matter experience go half rate asand it turns peopleand these gross disfigured mindless things meanwhile Scott laying after successfully cross job is still training is at man with Hankand hope that at some point here he upgrade to suitand test out new tech that allows him to become giant he tries it onceand passes out but hey it works Peter is continuing to Spiderman around the city at one point stopping a car crashand getting caught on camera the footage is uploaded to YouTubeand catches the eye of Tony Stark who keeps it in his watch later until he really needs it he’s got bigger stuff to think about right now is right around this point people are starting to take more notice of how much damage the superheroes have actually caused in their superheroand the guy who’s all over this is unsurprisingly general Ross from the days he needs of the presidentand his appointed Secretary of Stateand start talking about how they can keep the stuff moreand check the start of on the ideas for the Segovia cords basically a way of regulating superheroes with more oversight by forcing them to register with the government while this is happening Frank Castle continues his killing spree of people who were involved in this family’s murder going from truck murder to sniper murder to the bathroom murder is getting what he thinks is all them in a decides to move all of his life is the whole point the punisher was to avenge his family so that’s done now or so he thinks also after lectures not has stopping daredevil for a few months now because he’s just too sad things are not bad though foggy Nelson get some helpand I got in the barbershopand clears the cages nameand Lucas at a prison loop is up with Claireand they get that coffee they’d wanted Jessica Jones comes across lecture during one of her cases is still doing whatever the hand once rememberand objective Dragon bones under New York immortality the only problem is those Dragon bones are essential foundations for the city so the removal of them is causing serious earthquakesand could eventually to the whole city collapsing is also hiring a bunch of Harlem kids to help them kill and or clean up the mess is left behind by their enemies cages about this news like I got to protect the people of Harlemand Danny Randy is about this is like I gotta take a hand saw this lease to them crossing pathsand having a bit of a fight every day become friends because of their mutual friend Claire through fortuitous circumstances Jessica’s tracking guy connected to the handand that Murdoch ends up being her lawyerand also gets interested in the case so all four of them end up at the hands buildingand start fighting their ninjas electro sent into daredevil surprise but doesn’t remember him remind you of anyone but they all managed to get out of thereand go hide out in a Chinese restaurant where the become more acquainted state gets kidnapped by the hand but gets out of there by cutting off his own hand get itand goes to talk to the team Alexandraand had followed to see Alexandraand the hand is a whole knee iron fist alive because his iron fist is the key to open the gate to the sweet sweet Dragon bones if I happens electro starts remember who she isand that offenders get their hands on one of the hands main leaders also have their superhero team name is the defenders this guy is not of much help thoughand so stick to set off is not happy about this because they’re running out of there immortality juice the defender starting though because they’re like if the hand need you Danny we should probably had your wayand then he does what he does bestand is a whiny baby so they’ll punch him for a whileand then time however stickand typical stick fashion thinks that he might in the world so I’m getting kill him but lecture shows upand kill stickand tasty on fist to the hand she also kills Alexandra as she wants to be in charge I guess Jessica Jones find out more about that whole get it will found a while back with hands digging for Dragon bones after Lilith over the police that offenders minus Danny fight the hand plus the got Colleen to help Danny accidentally opens the gates of the Dragon bones because of course he doesand other defenders are fighting to hand in a lecture while also trying to block building so the hand can destroy New York the kudos guild Misty Knight loses an armand the offenders whenand get out of there butback to talk to Bucky I mean Electra yesterday heard the building collapses on the master kissingand that he saved by some nuns think look that they savedand that doesn’t actually die thank God it’s time to introduce another very important character very late in the game a Stephen strange is an amazing surgeon but he’s also super arrogantand kind of addict’s ex girlfriend also works with him called Rachel McAdams one day he’s drivingand textingand he crashes his car crushing his amazing surgeon hands in his life because he can’t be an awesome surgeon anymoreand he somehow even more awful to sex than usual really his life is just falling apart he starts to find ways to heal himself however ridiculous eventually he comes across Jonathan born the guy who trained with the ancient oneand was cured so strange has two Taj is there more to one of the masters takes into the ancient one because of all the crazy ultra dimensions there are at least the trip used ones he’s like help me learnand she’s like no your grossand sad in a terrible person but he pleadsand stays her door so she reluctantly changes her mind so strange that’s learning how to control the Mystic artsand other dimensionsand make hologram shieldsand whatnot with the help of Moto the ancient oneand the bookkeeper Wong who he befriends is about the different symptomsand how they protect worldand trains for several months along the way he also stumbles upon the times done sitting in a handy necklace the INI tomato figures out how to been time with it more unwanted like you don’t do that you could get stuck in a time loop anyway at one point you stuck to Mount Everest restraining just while all this other stuff is happening remember Stephen strange is getting great a magic this whole time so U ventures all trained upand going on missions also still looking for Bucky the next hydrogen in Lagosand think it might finally be Bucky but as they get there they realize it’s actually Brock Romo crossbones who understoodand is planning on suicide lineup himselfand Capt. From the capital nation to be only the abandoned government found wanting to you is down for lack of probably racial stories are for slavery would like we enjoyed helping our countries pushed the right from overcorrection Levi Roberts reports be noticeable degree for nearly a century was to story one of America’s years and will grow as he never heard her needs needs degree beating my hair as See Other related products: God Made Scots A Wee Bit Better T-Shirt

#God #Made #Scots #A #Wee #Bit #Better #T-Shirt

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whoacanada · 7 years

Text

‘Supremacy’, Part I

Pairing: Zimbits

Shameless Tropes: Cup Magic, Doppelganger AU, What-If, ‘not-so-Evil’ Twins

Warnings: Implied drug and alcohol abuse, fudging of timelines a little bit

A/N: Title thanks to Muse’s ‘Supremacy’, which I listened to on repeat for most of the time I mapped out this fic. Written as a late Christmas present for @omgpieplease and @heyfightme

Summary: Coming off his second cup win in as many seasons, Canadiens’ Forward Jack Laurent Zimmermann is the most beloved athlete in Canada.

Though his public persona is sterling, his private life is a mess and Montréal’s front office is desperately hiding more than a few secrets beneath the C on Jack’s sweater.

When a drunken cup wish strands him in an alternate reality where he dropped out of the draft, went to college, and still managed to make it to the NHL, Jack becomes desperate to make his counterpart’s world his new permanent home.

Montréal, QC, — two lives removed from a handful of terrible decisions…

“Phillip? Another?”

The bartender has been serving him as long as Jack has lived in the high rise a block over and the man knows how Jack likes his ‘mimosas’: with vodka instead of champagne so the paparazzi don’t get antsy.

He downs the rest of his glass, pokes at what’s left of his omelet, and ignores another call from his father. There is no part of him that wants to deal with whatever story Bettman’s team has spun for the Canadiens front office.

His phone vibrates again, wriggling toward the edge of the table like it’s possessed, and Jack finally swipes to take the call.

"How was your cup day?”

Bob wastes no time and Jack leans back in his seat, taking notice of the teenage girls a few tables over covertly trying to take his photo. He plasters on a smile and waves with his free hand. The blonde with braces and blue eyeshadow gasps and ducks back into the booth, before peeking over the cushion to see if he’s still watching.

He is. He's always watching. The phone in her hand might as well be a gun.

"I didn't damage it,” Jack answers, reaching to take his new drink from the waitress.

“I’m staring at an official memo that cites ‘Inappropriate Behavior’.”

“Oh, is that all? You can deal with ‘Inappropriate’, can’t you?” Jack pulls a pen from the pocket of his jacket and scribbles an autograph on a napkin, snags a passing waiter and whispers, ‘for the girl in the corner booth’.

“I swear to Christ — don’t take that tone with me. What the hell has gotten into you?”

“Oh, you know better than to ask questions you don’t want the answer to.”

“You can’t keep doing this —“

Jack debates hanging up — chancing a house call from his furious father and a fat organization fine — but the alcohol in his system is softening the situation just enough that Jack can’t seem to care.

“And what is ‘this’, exactly? Winning? Bringing Cups home to Montreal? What was it you told me, again? Something about how you don’t give a ‘flying fuck’ what I get up to on my own time as long I look good doing it?”

“Are you using again?"

“Fuck, don’t I wish,” the words are out before he can stop them and the line goes silent; for a moment, Jack thinks the call may have actually dropped.

“…Don’t tell me that. Never tell me that.”

Right. Plausible deniability.

“Yeah? What will you do if I don't? Suspend me?” Jack dares, waving at the girl again. She looks like she’s about to pass out and Jack wishes he could concentrate that excitement and shoot it right into his veins. “Or will you send me to rehab? I'm sure that'll play well.”

“Don’t make me take action, Jack. Neither of us will enjoy it.”

The girl in the corner is waving excitedly, and Jack knows she’s moments from working up the courage to come over and say thank you.

“Good talk, Bob.” He hangs up on his father, knowing damn well he’ll pay for that move later. Jack knows better than to motion for a bill, instead, he tosses down a hundred dollar note and waves halfheartedly at the wait staff he can see.

His good mood is long gone.

“Have you talked to your parents?”

“They don’t know. About any of it.”

Jack runs the nail of his thumb along the skin of his pointer finger, trying to calm his nerves.

“Well, are you going to tell them? I mean, you might straight-up vanish.”

The FaceTime connection keeps freezing and Jack stares at the disapproving downturn of Kent's lips for six seconds before the feed catches up.

"Don't think that would be the most prudent course of action at this point."

"Just, tell me this: when was the last time you were actually happy?"

It's almost upsetting how quickly he realizes he knows the answer.

"Ugh. How are you so handsome?" Bittle asks, tugging Jack's hair out from its bun so the sweaty locks fall on his face. "It's disgusting. You're disgusting. A disgusting, handsome, sweaty hockey player."

“Doesn’t seem to bother you much,” Jack pauses from where he's pressing messy kisses to Bittle's flushed torso. "It's all those pretty boys you train with, making you crave something more rugged."

His partner reaches up to scratch his nails over the stubble on Jack's cheek. "You're pretty cocky, hon," he whispers, voice thick like honeyed wine, and Jack's done for. He could die happy with this spitfire in his arms and a gold medal around his neck.

"I'm literally the best the world has to offer, I can afford to be cocky," Jack laughs and covers Eric's mouth with his own, tugging at Bittle's bottom lip gently with his teeth. "And so are you. We're a perfect match."

"We are?"

"You’ve made a fan of me," Jack runs a thumb over the Olympic rings tattooed on Eric's hip. "I've been trying to find a way to talk to you since Sochi."

"Seriously?"

"Not to scare you off or anything but I really wanted to meet you."

Eric’s bravado tapers and he tries to hide his face but Jack doesn’t miss the way the skin over his cheekbones flushes a warm peach; it makes his breath catch in his throat.

“Glad I live up to the hype,” Eric whispers shyly, and Jack dips his head again for a kiss relishing how he can feel the way Bittle smiles against his lips. It's almost better than winning.

Almost.

"Pyeongchang."

"The Olympics?"

Jack wants to say yes so desperately because it feels unclean to verbalize his obsession but Kenny, as usual, beats him to the punch.

"No, shit, you're talking about --" Jack looks away from the screen, not quite willing to see pity on another ex's face. "You know, you never actually told me what happened," Kenny prods gently. "Must have been something serious if you're still hung up on the guy."

Morning comes too soon and while Jack can ignore the alarm on his phone, Bittle isn't so content. When Jack rolls over, intent on clutching Eric as close as possible for as long as possible, he finds his partner watching him with an expression Jack can't quite read, his phone clutched tightly in his fist.

"I should head out. I have a phone interview at nine and my publicist needs to —” he stops himself and takes a measured breath before asking, “do you have a Valium or something?”

Jack’s still bleary with sleep but he nods to his bag. Eric steps over his clothes from the night before to dig through Jack’s things for a pill bottle. Crouched the way he is, Jack can make out the tell-tale purple bruise of a bite mark on his hip.

“Someone took a picture of us in Korea,” Eric explains, cracking half a pill and tossing it back dry. “You can’t tell it’s you in the photos — but my publicist has been fielding calls from sponsors talking about morality clause violations.”

After the initial panic that accompanies ‘picture of us’, Jack breathes and refocuses on what Eric isn’t saying, his posture, all of the new information that he needs to work through.

“You’re in violation for going on a date?”

“I’m in violation for kissing an unknown man in public, in a foreign country, while wearing clothing belonging to an ‘identifiable brand’ .”

“That’s bullshit. You’re gay. You’re out, it’s not a secret.”

“I can date but, being ‘publicly indecent’ with a random man is unbecoming of Team USA,” Bittle quotes lamely, dropping his arms and tossing his phone onto the bedspread. “Fuck.”

“I’m not a random guy,” Jack defends but he doesn’t need to fill in the gaps. He just won his second cup, he isn’t public, and he has no plans to come out. The sheet covering him is suddenly too heavy as he kicks at the bedding to get some of the building energy out.

“Literally no one else knows that. Right now I’m just your secret,” Eric points out, pulling on the same briefs Jack removed himself not eight hours earlier. “I’m not a hockey player, Jack. I don’t get paid a hundred million dollars to fling pucks into nets. My job is 90% image — I need to pay for training and ice time, and when you have sponsors there can be really shitty strings attached. I don’t know why I’m telling you this, you know better than anyone.”

“You’re not a secret, you’re…” Jack trails off realizing he doesn’t know how to finish his sentence. Eric turns to him and looks older than Jack has ever seen him.

“I’m your ‘what’, Jack?”

“My boyfriend,” Jack swallows against the lump in his throat. “Or, I wanted you to be.”

Eric falls back on the bed and pulls a leg underneath himself. Leaning against the headboard, Jack can see their reflection on the glass of the television mounted to the wall — like a photo they’ll never be able to actually take. He knows what’s coming because he’s been here before.

Jack’s never been great with goodbyes.

"You're hyper-focusing like a motherfucker, have you talked to your therapist about this? That was like four months ago."

"Well, it still hurts like yesterday," Jack scoffs and takes a pull from his beer.

"Okay, look, it doesn't matter," Kenny refocuses, "you made a wish on your cup day, a vague-ass, stupid wish, and we need to figure out what the fuck is about to happen to you. Maybe you get lucky and nothing happens but you need to talk to your father in case you end up like a zombie or some shit —“

"Fuck my father," Jack snaps. "He's two steps from throwing me on IR, the last thing I need to do is pour gasoline on that fire."

“Wait, what did you do, now? Piss in the cup?”

“No.” Jack doesn’t elaborate and Kenny’s brow furrows with suspicion.

“Then talk to your Uncle. Anyone. Just as a backup plan for when you blow up.”

“I should get to bed,” Jack hints, desperately wanting the conversation to be over, and, ever diligent, Parson nods and tells him to call first thing in the morning. Just to be sure he hasn’t expired in the night.

They say their goodbyes and Jack closes the lid on his laptop; falling back against the pillows, willing sleep to come and hoping against hope he’ll feel better when he wakes up.

Providence, RI

It takes a moment for those attending the Falconers’ first Family Skate of the season to realize there are two Jack Zimmermanns facing off at center ice.

One in Falconers’ blue, the other in Canadiens’ red.

#zimbits #omgcp #omgcheckplease #jack/bitty #jack zimmermann #eric bittle #my stuff #my writing #doppelganger au #perfect au #part 1

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elizabethrobertajones · 6 years

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you ever think about how they hired twins to play the triplets that dean and crowley have sex with. I feel like that right there is proof that they're not queerbaiting, because no one could possibly be baited by that because 99 percent of everyone didn't even notice it. They just put it in there cause dean's bi and they write him as bi.

It’s funny, for whatever reason I was thinking last night about how my own personal definition of the way the show may or may not queerbait has changed over the seasons, and it’s not just to do with personal growth but the way the show is written and the way they are handling things.

My impression of how it all felt in the start of season 10 was utter disbelief that they were so on the nose about Dean and Crowley, and I know not everyone wants to/does think that they hooked up, but there’s some stuff the show pushed there that in some ways it would have no other excuse to do and I went cold on Drowley several times after feeling like the handling was sweeping it under the rug, writing it off as villainous queerness or other ways to distance Dean from it like suggesting he wasn’t in control or roofied by being a demon, that thankfully at least was not how Crowley died on the show, with 12x15 giving us the last example of how that dynamic had matured, and it WAS matured, and at least in terms of respecting that Dean n Crowley had once eloped, was about as good as it could get. And I think owning that the dynamic wasn’t a sense of that time being abusive was important given how much Dean and Crowley interacted and behaved towards each other AFTER, as well as exactly how we were supposed to read whether Dean should feel violated or smug or nostalgic about it all (and he did flash between them depending on the season or episode in the time after). But at the start of season 10 this whole journey was really only just beginning.

Obviously people had written about the queercoding and Crowley’s seduction before then, but in very careful metaphorical terms, and as much as it was suggestive in season 9, the fact is that without season 10 it could easily remain a metaphorical ~seduction to evil~ where this was written in terms of romantic seduction - except for where it was fatherly or brotherly - but 10x01 smashed that and made it really really clear that you could read that Dean and Crowley had been hooking up, even independent of the twins/triplets subtext. Specifically when Crowley is annoyed Dean and Ann-Marie hooked up in his bed, and Ann-Marie tells him and Dean to get a room, and he’s like, we had one. Of course you can pretend that not everything Crowley says is innuendo (and room = specifically the bed), but that exchange had a lot of jealousy and a lot about his and Dean’s *personal* relationship, as much as the other stuff was about the more wild stuff they shared with others while howling at the moon. Which was part of the longer term emotional game Crowley was playing about their business relationship and Dean being his scary consort and them sort of going exclusive >.>

And in that context, Crowley mentions they’d done some memorable stuff to triplets together, and on rewatching you catch they’re hanging out with twins in the bar before that, but the wider context was this absolute explosion of queer subtext and borderline text and a dynamic that needed concentrated work to not come to the conclusion they’d been fucking all summer, with and without buddies of whatever gender with them. Focusing on the male twins in the background as a hint that Dean had had sex with men is ignoring where Crowley directly implies they’d been hooking up and now he wanted to go exclusive with Dean as the hugest neon sign that, yes, Dean has been having sex with at least one man, regardless of the gender of the triplets. Like, I know people were like hurr blurr the triplets could have been women, #no homo, sometimes men sleep with triplets together like bros. Which traps us into hyperfocusing on what the triplets were and using them as the definitive proof, when in fact the reason triplets were being banged in the first place was because Dean and Crowley were banging all the time everywhere up and down seedy bars in America, and Dean didn’t want the good times to end, while Crowley wanted the d all for himself now pls.

And considering that’s the thing under the paper thin surface that you can remotely pretend that Dean only slept with women and he and Crowley were just hanging out the entire time, regardless of no matter how much more subtext the show piled on later, less close to the surface but with more confidence that everyone knew Dean had banged Crowley and the only way any of this worked any more was that that had happened, even just when we only had 10x01 to work with, the whole Dean n Crowley thing was so enormous that you can’t just speculate on what the twins were to approach to what degree was this queerbaiting or not. The twins are a detail that you can pick up on and speculate on if you look deeper, as they know we sometimes do. I’m not saying they’re NOT an aspect of this, but they’re a relatively buried easter egg of subtext compared to, say, Crowley sobbing over his flickr albums in the next episode :P

To what degree Drowley was queerbaiting is the real question, and since Crowley is now consigned to the show’s history books, we have the full story in a way. In the context of what we have now, I don’t think overall, all comments included, the show ever pretended, even when distancing Dean from it, even when painting it as abusive or Dean having diminished responsibility, that Dean and Crowley did *not* bang. I think there are multiple comments which as long as you are permissive that Dean would have could have probably did, that in seasons 11 and 12 pretty clearly indicate a memory of having slept together one point or another, especially 11x23 and 12x15 with overt references to sexual things from Crowley to Dean, or 11x07 and the implication that over a year later Dean still has Crowley’s answerphone messages from howling at the moon, and knows and remembers details of his personal life fondly. (I don’t think that’s the only time Bobo wrote them like that but that’s the one that springs to mind :P)

Buuut they never showed them on screen in such a way that could be seen from the moon as them together, like actually showing them IN a sexual relationship while Dean was a demon, or having Dean confirm Crowley’s innuendo with more than the usual reactions where he gets plausible deniability to any gay stuff going on. And SOME of that I think MAY be to do with the problems with the villainous queerness slant, and the way it was at times framed as abusive/Dean lacking control. Because they would not commit to exploring the aftermath of that relationship SERIOUSLY, i.e. making it clear they had slept together when Dean was a demon, and him on-screen dealing with how that made him feel and how he felt about Crowley, and even, god forbid, his own sexuality, the best they could do to resolve it was to establish eventually a sort of civil exes dynamic, both aware of their history, but not harping on it, even if Crowley remained somewhat to entirely besotted by Dean for the rest of his time on the show. The lack of handling it seriously means it stays as a somewhat jokey subtext later on, and they can play it off as no harm no foul by the end of season 11 and through season 12.

I think in that vein it also eventually contributed to Crowley being sidelined and eventual downfall, because he was trapped in the subtext of being Dean’s ex and all the enormous complications that made between them and for his personal life, again without being able to explore it or leave a lasting, openly discussed impact on him. He no longer directly antagonised them, but he couldn’t cross any lines which made him human or part of the team for more than passing moments because the longer he was around Dean the more awkward it got and the more it would beg them to explore what, exactly, were Dean and Crowley now, and the obvious issues that would have/could have arisen if we discussed this like adults and we were allowed to just textually state in a frank and open way that Dean had been seduced by Crowley that one time.

And I think in terms of where that puts us, it means that Drowley was very much a stifled relationship, officially over and no chance of getting it back, which in some ways is as large as or larger then Destiel in the weight it puts on the show when it comes to answering queerbaiting charges, because it could never be addressed openly while Crowley was alive, still ISN’T acknowledged, and Dean is as closeted as he was before, despite in his actual living human memory, knowing what it’s like to bang Crowley on the side for 3 months of his life with no direct personal growth (that is: now banging Cas, happily, or even banging other random guys, no angst, just for fun hook ups, equivalent to the textual times he picks up women) to show for this wild college experimentation metaphor phase of his life.

At this point you really can only change the final judgement on it by making Dean canonically bi and then giving him the character growth, acknowledging the role Crowley had played in it, and allowing him to live what had just been subtext as a textual part of his character. In all other respects, I think the fact that Dean subtextually has hooked up with Crowley, and presumably other men probably other than the male implied triplets we saw on screen as well, but it’s relegated to this one particular part of his story and locked up in the subtext box, is going to look absolutely like one of the show’s worst sins of queerbaiting if we get to the end and that box is never opened again. And not to say it all looks rosy while we wait until the hypothetical what if of textualising Dean’s bisexuality and trying to live a positive life of hoping that will happen. As it stands, the handling in the text is depressing, and speaks of how far the show will currently allow any queer relationship for Dean to go. Meaning a worst case scenario is that his borderline subtextual marriage to Cas may never move beyond a similar point if this remains the high water mark of the show’s willingness to show Dean in a genuine, sexual relationship with a man. And that’s something you have to at least think about, in terms of how it looks now, and how it might look one day, no matter how positive you are about the endgame of the show, when it comes to being realistic about the show’s queerbaiting, or at least perceived queerbaiting if you don’t believe they are. That’s what other people are seeing, both with Drowley and Destiel.

I mean, that deleted scene in 10x14 says it best: Cas and Crowley trapped together, frustrated and living in angry despair in their competition over Dean, where he is busy not picking either of them, while they vie for his attention and consider each other his boyfriend in all but name, and yet he will not commit to either of them in the way they desire. And this is the same frustrated wall that Cas is still stuck bouncing up against, even when his romantic rival is *utterly* vanquished and removed from the narrative, and hadn’t even really been competing for Dean for like 2 seasons before that.

#Asks #10x01 #dean x crowley for ts #this isn't meant wankily at all because I love the show and I'm forgiving and permissive of all this as anything #but still #I have to see this and call it when I do #regardless of how I feel in general about the show #so I am writing from as neutral a point of view as I can here #dean is bi #and you know I personally celebrated each and every nugget of Drowley subtext they gave us :P

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bibliophileiz · 7 years

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Supernatural “War of the Worlds” Review Or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Tolerate b*cklemming

These people are far from my favorite writers on the show (that would be Berens, Glynn and Yockey, the last of whom wrote my two favorite episodes) but every time an episode they wrote airs I want to dissect all the good and bad of it anyway, and this is no exception. This is I think their third episode in a row I’ve felt the urge to review. I think it’s a coping mechanism to help me tolerate these episodes.

This was not b*cklemming’s worst episode – I still think that was the one in which Eileen died – but it was not great either. It’s watchable, don’t get me wrong. But we’ve had a string of stellar episodes this season except for two. Two. And they were both written by this duo.

Unequivocally bad things about this episode:

- Who the FUCK decided to put b*cklemming in charge of apocalypse world? There do indeed appear to be no women, period. I kept hoping the creepy hunter who attacked Mary in their last episode only thought there were no women because all the women around had the good sense to avoid him, but … nope. It appears he was right. The whole apocalypse place looks like the cast of Lawrence of Arabia with a darker aestetic. Either mittensmorgul or elizabethrobertajones (I can’t remember which and the post is too far back for me to find but both have excellent blogs!) pointed out this just keeps b*cklemming from writing creepy rape scenes all over apocalypse world, which is a fair point. However, b*cklemming has written plenty of problematic sexually violent stuff victimizing male characters, albeit usually being victimized by women (April to Cas, Toni to Sam). Also it just generally irks me when an otherwise well-written show suggests women can’t survive harsh circumstances. I know they have to stay on Supernatural, but someone please keep this pair away from Wayward Sisters. - Asmodeus sucked only marginally less in this episode than when he was introduced, and that’s only because he had the suckiest introduction of anyone in this show. He. Is. Still. Awful. I can’t believe the show is going to waste the Keeping-Cas-Locked-Up-In-Hell story line I’ve been waiting for on this assclown of a villain. - AU verse Kevin Tran is like … I would say Diet Kevin Tran except I usually like diet drinks better than their counterparts, so I guess it’s more like … Vegan Chocolate Kevin Tran. I can see the resemblance, but the original has more flavor and more richness and doesn’t work for genocidal war criminals just to see hot women. My theory before this episode aired was Kevin’s a double agent for a group of hunters who have formed a resistance, led by Asa Fox and, eventually, Mary Winchester, and if we ever get an apocalypse episode written by Berens or Glynn, I might even be proved right (about the double agent part. The Asa Fox part is a stretch, I realize this). In the meantime, this was a total waste of the character. - Did b*cklemming just forget the show is about Sam? He had that one scene with Ketch which is super forgettable. In all his other scenes, he was just kind of there. It was like they were writing and would occasionally say, “We need to give Dean’s sidekick a line now.”

Good Things (several of which have nothing to do with b*cklemming)

-Cas’ sex hair is back. - I didn’t hate the Cas-Lucifer team up as much as I expected to. In fact, I thought the scene between them at the bar was the best in the episode. I unequivocally hated the way these writers – really all the writers – wrote Lucifer last season, but b*cklemming actually wrote some of my favorite Lucifer material in the entire show. Specifically I’m thinking of Lucifer (as played by Misha Collins) telling Amara she may defeat God but she will never be him – not a Lucifer redemption moment by any means, but certainly a moment where he gets to be something other than an entitled brat. It shows even though he hates God, he also admires him. You also see this in his reaction to finding out Kelly’s pregnant. She said he was excited because it was the first time he created anything, which I remember thinking was a really in-character reaction to have. This explains why he’s so interested in whatever Cas has to say about Jack too. However, I don’t want my enthusiasm for dad!Lucifer to be taken as me wanting a redemption arc for this fucker, because I don’t. I don’t hate the idea of him almost being redeemed. We the audience are sympathetic to Jack, and once Jack realizes he can be good, he’s going to want to redeem his father, Luke Skywalker-style. I like the idea of Jack trying to “save” Lucifer – “There is still good in him, I know it!” – and for Lucifer to kind of go along with it until something happens and Lucifer reveals himself to be as entitled and jealous and petty and power-hungry as he’s always been, and then Sam and Mary or maybe Cas get to kill him. If we’re sticking with the Star Wars parallels, then I want it to be like the moment Han Solo offers Kylo Ren a second chance and Kylo stabs him instead. I like Lucifer, but at the end of the day, fuck him. - Related, I also didn’t hate Mark Pellegrino. He’s never been a bad actor, he’s just been a shallow one, but that’s the material he had to work with. When he has decent lines and isn’t smirking around evil-for-the-sake-of-evil dialogue, I find I want to punch him less. More specifically, he did a good job posturing while also showing the audience he is terrified without all his power. That little flinch when Asmodeus enters the bar, before he pretends to relax and starts casually threatening Asmodeus, was great. - We finally got acknowledgement the universe is running out of angels. - Guys. Rowena might still be alive. If Ketch is alive and Rowena isn’t, I might stop watching this show. - Cas’ sex hair is back. -Speaking of Cas, I was concerned he wouldn’t tell Dean he was working with Lucifer because he thought Dean would be mad or because he would want Sam and Dean to stay away because danger or because Lucifer talked him out of it or some bullshit like that and it would be last season all over again. I’m so, so glad they didn’t go that route even though it means we get more shapeshifting (voiceshifting?) Prince of Hell nonsense. - Lucifer calling Asmodeus the runt of the litter made me feel better. At least b*cklemming admit theirs is the worst Prince of Hell. - “Honey, you’re not Lucifer. My ex-husband’s Lucifer.” - Did I mention Cas’ sex hair is back? - I liked the witch and on the one hand wish she’d had more to do but on the other hand am worried b*cklemming would have killed her if she had another scene. - When Asmodeus referenced a hunter in his payroll, I thought, ‘I bet it’s David Haydn-Jones.’ I love being right. - Dean asking if Ketch’s tattoo was a stick-on. - The shots at the playground are all beautiful. Good job Richard Speight, Jr.! - The fight scenes are. So. Good. - Seriously. Cas’ sex hair. It’s back.

Questions I have

- Where did Lucifer get that jacket? - Why do the demons call Jack “the Jack”? - How does Ketch know Sam and Dean are looking for Jack? Sam said he reached out to “every hunter we know” but firstly, how many of those are left that aren’t dead and secondly, who of them knows Ketch but doesn’t know he’s evil? - How does Lucifer know Kevin? I thought he was locked up during Kevin’s story line.

Now let’s talk about Ketch.

I’m so used to bad writing from this pair, I didn’t even see the Ketch reveal coming. Based on their not-great track record, here is a list of things b*cklemming would totally do: - Write a less-evil twin for a dead character. - Have Ketch torture and kill a bunch of witches – to find Rowena – so he can find and kill her – because she’s a witch. - Have Arthur Ketch’s less-evil twin Alexander Ketch still ask about Mary even though he’s never met her. - Look like they’re about to give Ketch a redemption arc.

So I totally bought it.

Like … good job? Good for them for fooling me by being, like, the lowest bar of competent. It’s sort of like how I spent all of Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince thinking Malfoy couldn’t be up to anything because he’d spent the five previous books showing up way too often to make the same bad jokes about Harry and Co. over and over. It’s not as good as writing well the first time, but points for improving.

And at first I was excited because I thought – and still think – Ketch will make a much better villain when not loaded down with Men of Letters baggage because the Men of Letters were cartoonishly stupid and Ketch was actually threatening when not anywhere near them. But … where are they going with this? k-vichan pointed out this episode undoes both Mary’s victories from last season – knocking Lucifer into AU World and killing Ketch. Which is typical b*cklemming. To be fair, we knew Lucifer had to come back, but what could they possibly do with Ketch they haven’t already done? His villain arc ended perfectly – Mary killed him in defense of Dean. That was literally the best way he could have possibly died. It was the cathartic, climactic moment of last season’s emotional arc. I’ve seen some people suggest Dean will get to kill Ketch now and – no. No. Killing Ketch was always going to be Mary’s victory, and I’ll be disappointed in the show and the writers if they take that away from her.

All in all, a mixed bag of an episode. Which is disappointing after a string of nothing but good episodes this season from everyone but b*cklemming. (Ish. I’m afraid we may not be looking at the cowboy episode rationally. I’m going to have to wait until Netflix gets the new season and watch it again and decide then if I’m being rational about liking it or if I’m just excited about Dean’s cowboy hat and Cas’ fake western accent.) But next week we’re back to Glynn and then Berens and then Wayward Sisters, so hopefully it’s a long time before we have to deal with this nonsense again. Meanwhile, here are some things I want out of future episodes.

- Kevin being cool again. - Mrs. Tran. - Mary Winchester. - (louder for the people in the back) MARY WINCHESTER! - Rowena. - Dean figuring out the Cas he’s talking to on the phone is not Cas. - AU Resistance leader Asa Fox - Something cool in apocalypse world other than a church Jerry Wanek built. (Good job Wanek, I’m so sorry it couldn’t be in a better episode.) - Maybe some other AU resistance versions of characters like Bela Talbot (unlikely but a girl can dream), Godron Walker (AU Resistance Gordon Walker would be awesome!), Ellen Harvelle (bonus points if she and Bobby are married), Jo Harvelle (acceptable if they can’t get Ellen), FemCastiel (bonus points if she also ends up in Real World and meets Sam and Dean and Dean’s like, “Who’s the hot angel?” and she’s like, “My name is Castiel,” and Sam starts laughing and Dean’s like, “Fuck, I hope Chuck’s not making this one into a book.”)

#supernatural spoilers #13x07 #b*cklemming wank #b*cklemming have written the only not-great episodes this season #i'm just saying #i need a tag for them if i'm going to keep reviewing just their episodes #how I learned to stop worrying and tolerate b*cklemming

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faircatch · 7 years

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Jackson and Ethan... Jathan? Ethkson? I don’t know...

Okay... Bear with me, this may get a little sloppy - I know what I want to say and I may not say it right, but I’m going to try...

So yeah, by now the news has spread in the fandom that it is canon that Ethan and Jackson are a couple.

I have nothing against this personally - don’t have a dog in the fight so to speak... but I do have some issues with the poor writing and poor choices that TW has made... yet again.

First let me just be confused by the fact that you’d bring back OF ALL THE CHARACTERS.... ETHAN?

(Sorry if the rest of this is rambling... but there’s more)

Rather than make a new character, you bring back Ethan? I just. I just can’t with you Teen Wolf. Was it just to have another werewolf? You could have had a European shifter... someone who Jackson might meet? The options were all out there... But of course not...

So my BIGGEST issue with Ethan (and Aiden) is that they are murderers. There’s no question of that. IT IS CANON THAT THEY KILLED THEIR PACK. Taking out EVERYTHING else, that is CANON. Whatever reasons they had, they still did that. And that’s not like... “Oops, I killed EVERYONE in the pack in self defense by accident.” Nope. They systematically did so. I have no idea what pack they had, but there might have been children in there... who knows? (this is like arguing with me that Anakin wasn’t evil - DUDE KILLED CHILDREN - we all saw... so yeah, misunderstood teenager goes out the window, but I digress). We also know that Ethan and Aiden forced Derek to kill Boyd - I consider them Boyd’s killers with Derek’s claws basically being a weapon - like a knife. THEY still did it. And they helped kill Erica.

So, yeah, Ethan was a murderer. Now, he seemed to be less of an a-hole than his brother, but that doesn’t excuse him. Nor does his relationship with actual living sassy sunshine Danny, negate what he did or who he was.

When they were turning on Deucalion, I didn’t feel like it was all, “OH MY GOD, WHAT HAVE WE DONE!” so much as, “Holy shitsnacks, this guy is nuts, we gotta get out of here or we’re gonna die.” And the fact that people were accepting them after 3A - like possibly taking them into the pack was CRAZY to me! Uh...hello, anyone recall all the death?

But hey, that’s Jeff and his writing team, right? Why should there be ANY lasting repercussions for violent or horrible actions, amirite? (I won’t even go into Theo...) . Hey kids, be as horrible as you want because of reasons!

For shits and giggles, let’s say it IS brought up... Considering the off brand Cheerios writing that seems to be the norm for the show... I’m willing to bet it will go a little something like this:

TW Character calling Ethan on his past: “But... he’s a murderer!”

Jackson soulfully looking into camera: “So am I...” And that will end the discussion, because, yeah... Jackson was a murderer too... Except no. He wasn’t.

There is a HUGE difference between Jackson killing people as the Kanima - he was not conscious of doing it. He didn’t choose to do it and it was done against his will. As opposed to Ethan, who consciously chose to commit the murders he committed... all of them. Even if he pause or tried to oppose it and Aiden was the one that instigated it, that doesn’t excuse Ethan.

Yes, they mention that the twins were treated horribly by their pack. Sure, that’s a reason, but it isn’t an excuse. You don’t excuse someone for murder because you understand their reasons. (Yes, I am aware there are mitigating circumstances for everything and I’m not trying to make a blanket statement here, but I think you understand what I mean) I would excuse them killing their Alpha or one or two of the their pack in a self defense moment... and then getting the hell out of there... Or maybe Deucalion convinced them it was the better way for them... but we already know it was about power. So yeah, there is NO comparing Jackson’s and Ethan’s situations.

I mean, maybe Jackson doesn’t see the difference between himself and Ethan. Maybe he thinks, “I’m a murderer (hence the blue eyes) so I’m no different than Ethan... and we’re both trying to make up for the evil we have done.” but even so... just allowing Ethan to wander in like he did NOTHING? It’s bothered me since season 3. I mean... Taking a look at this... Ethan is no better than Matt - Matt used Jackson to kill and Ethan used Derek to kill! Jackson SHOULD NOT BE WITH HIM!

And WHERE IS DANNY IN ALL OF THIS? Chances are, Ethan heard about Jackson from Danny... and I can’t imagine that Jackson would date Danny’s ex-boyfriend. It would make MORE sense for Jackson to date Danny... I mean, it would have been glorious for Jackson to say, “Guess I AM everybody’s type...” ::smirk:: And it’s REALLY uncool for Jackson to date his best friend’s ex...

So yeah... while I don’t care that much about the direction of the show, it is still frustrating to see the choices made by the writers in regards to these characters. I know there is a lot of hate towards Jackson about how he treated Lydia and I get that... but he was going through his own emotional teenage issues that made him a douchebag... STILL DIDN’T KILL HIS FAMILY. I’m not saying he was such a great guy... but NOT a murderer.

Jeezus Teen Wolf... you just make my brain tired...

#Teen Wolf #teen wolf season 6 #teen wolf season 6b #Jackson #jackson whittemore #ethan #jeff davis

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robertdoc · 7 years

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25 signature moments of Twin Peaks: The Return

One for each year Twin Peaks has been away. All listed in airing order, some are NSFW. Only the first five YouTube clips were able to be embedded directly.

Part 1 – The Experiment attacks

We were all so naïve on May 21, 2017. Well, at least those of us were who thought that the early scene of two youngsters hooking up in front of a giant glass New York City box would be interrupted by Dale Cooper’s return to our world.

But unlike them, we weren’t punished for our naivety by having a supernatural woman/experiment/BOB’s possible creator slaughter our naked bodies. Still, it was the first of many, MANY Cooper-related fake outs David Lynch would sic on us poor survivors.

youtube

Part 2 – Laura and Cooper in the Red Room again

The full story of this moment won’t become clearer until Sunday, as a secret whisper from Laura to Cooper in the Red Room is destined to unlock some major answer many episodes later, just like it did 27 years ago.

There are some clear differences this time around, however. For one thing, the audible and distressed gasp from Cooper at Laura’s message may take on extra significance on Sunday – especially if it has to do with the two women in Dale’s heart that Mr. C has hurt the most.

For another, there’s the whole face removal trick – one that may run in the family – and sudden flight trick that Laura didn’t have in 1990.

Part 3 – The Purple Room

Just when we had the Red Room and the two Lodges figured out, the opening half of Part 3 gave us and Cooper the Purple Room in space to contend with.

It also introduced us and Cooper to an eyeless woman named Naido – but if certain theories that have emerged about Naido’s true identity after Part 16 are correct, this may have hardly been her first encounter with Cooper. Her first encounter with a good Cooper in 25 years, maybe.

youtube

Parts 3 & 4 – Mr. Jackpots

I hate/hated Dougie Jones. Hated hated hated watching him.

Even in these opening moments with him, I kept expecting/hoping something would wake the old Cooper up and stewed when it didn’t, and the pattern kept going for 12 long weeks.

Still, this proved to be one of his most/few enduring long adventures, if not a sign of better things to come.

youtube

Part 6 – Another Twin Peaks youth dies

Twin Peaks was a darker and less positively magical town than it was 25 years ago, for multiple reasons. But both then and now, it is a town used to mourning the senseless, painful and almost pointless losses of its youngest and most vulnerable citizens.

Nonetheless, it may say something disturbingly positive that those left behind remain capable of standing still at such losses, mourning them together, and reaching out to comfort each other.

This is all made clear in a masterful snowball of events, from seemingly mystical drug dealer Red’s intimidation of Richard Horne, to Richard’s furious and ultimately fatal response behind the wheel, to Harry Dean Stanton’s Carl finding his way towards the tragic results, and to the Black Lodge once more feeding on Twin Peaks’ latest food supply of pain and suffering.

youtube

Part 6 – Hello Diane

The knowledge that Laura Dern would be returning to Lynch’s world at some point in this series, and the set-up at the end of Part 4 that Albert and Gordon Cole needed “one certain person” to see an imprisoned Mr. C, made it easy/hopeful to guess what this would all lead up to.

Regardless, the official unveiling of Dern as Cooper’s long unseen Diane – or so we assumed back then – was a brief but powerful event unto itself. Even so, Albert did his best to upstage it by bashing Gene Kelly in his wet race to Diane’s favorite bar.

youtube

Part 7 – Diane and Mr. C

Diane’s brief intro in Part 6 made her fuller introduction as a cursing, bitter, Cooper hating ex-Fed in Part 7 all the more startling. But when she finally gave in and saw the being claiming to be Cooper in prison, the walls came tumbling down.

Dern and Kyle MacLachlin are Lynch’s signature muses, yet this was the first time in 31 years that they shared a scene for him. As it stands now, unless the real Diane = Naido theories are true and there is more magic way to restore Naido into a Dern-like form, this will go down as their only reunion scene.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JmsIHL2LEBA

Part 7 – A long, clean sweep

Lynch trolled everyone with long and seemingly pointless extended scenes every episode or two. This was the most notorious example, but it did have one of the better punchlines.

By this point, the tradition of ending each episode with a musical act at the Roadhouse had been established. As such, cutting to someone sweeping the empty Roadhouse while old background music played seemed like a tweak to that formula, and the end of this particular episode. But the longer the credits and the “Starring Kyle MacLachlin” message didn’t come up, the more that this otherwise useless scene of someone sweeping a floor actually became the most suspenseful moment of the year.

When it turned out not to be the final scene of the episode at all, the joke was really on us. For that matter, it may be double on us since this scene may not have even been real. Either way, this was one of the better laughs Lynch had at our expense.

https://vimeo.com/222322307

Part 8 – The birth of the Black Lodge age

The Black Lodge has fed on fear, misery and pointless suffering for what may be centuries or more. So of course, it broke the barrier into our reality and began a decades-long feast on mankind thanks to the moment that spawned one of the most fearful, suffering-filled ages of American history and of the 20’th century – and one that was reborn anew in the 21’st century just weeks after this episode aired.

The birth of the nuclear age, of the Lodge’s evil grasp on Earth and of BOB himself put Twin Peaks on a level previously explored by Stanley Kubrick and Terrance Malick. But Lynch’s own metaphysical story of Creation proved to be a lot darker.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4IKUeIEdRMY

Part 8 – Laura descends

While the Black Lodge has been a dominant force in all dimensions, the White Lodge has still clung to life. So when the Lodge and BOB broke through into our world, the White Lodge Giant/Fireman sent onto Earth a new creation of its own – and turned Laura Palmer from murdered teen into a Biblical figure.

For the Fireman did so loveth the world that he hath given his only daughter/orb, sent to die for the sins of the Black Lodge/BOB/the nuclear age, only to bring about the Holy Cooper/Dougie to finish the job. That whosover believeth in Laura should not perish, but have eternal life as a Tulpa.

All that’s missing from the analogy is a Christ-worth resurrection – at least until Sunday.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=id75c8HGAxw

Part 8 – The Woodsmen descend

Although the first atomic test shattered the barriers between our world and the Black Lodge, the first encounter between worlds came years later in New Mexico. In fact, one of the sinister Woodsmen made his presence known on the radio and called on others to join him, in a message that serves as The Return’s equivalent of the original “Fire Walk With Me” poem.

But a frog like cockroach was already well ahead of the curve, whether or not it was BOB himself, and whether or not his first victim was a young Sarah Palmer.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ir8s6IGq2Hs

Part 9 – Bobby’s destiny

Several old Twin Peaks veterans died before The Return, yet their characters became a major part of the story anyway. Chief among them was Major Garland Briggs, whose head was left floating near the Purple Room, but whose body left major clues that Mr. C and the FBI have raced to find.

Yet his biggest messages were left behind in Twin Peaks for his son Bobby – the very same son who was as bewildered as the rest of us when Garland foresaw his bright future in the Season 2 premiere.

However, the late Major Briggs was fully vindicated when now-Deputy Bobby Briggs led the way in decoding his father’s mysterious coordinates, and setting the stage for him and the sheriff’s station team to fulfill an even grander purpose.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WKNC53Aq36E

Part 11 – He’s dead

In contrast, the Blue Rose FBI team took a more deadly and mystical route towards those coordinates. The mystical part came when Gordon peered through the sky into the world of the Woodsmen, while the deadly part came through finally finding the headless body of Ruth Davenport – just moments before her lover Bill Hastings shared her headless fate.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mK63wAVLFw

Part 11 – The Mitchum’s dream cherry pie

By this point, it was far too easy to root for the casino owning Mitchum brothers as they plotted to knock off Dougie Jones, if only so Cooper might finally take his place. It got so bad that one could relate to Jim Belushi, of all people, as he could barely wait three more hours to get rid of him – although it turned out to only take four.

Yet against all odds, this sequence became the most delightful Dougie-related set piece since Mr. Jackpots, even though Dougie was still standing afterwards. Credit has to go to a White Lodge-influenced dream that came true in the nick of time, a cherry pie-ex machina, and a newly cemented friendship that is now paying off in the wake of Cooper’s true revival.

If that wasn’t enough, the elderly casino player that got rich from “Mr. Jackpots” later returned to thank Dougie, which helped forge a grudging acceptance that Dougie really was doing enough good to balance/correct Mr. C’s evil, even if that goodness hadn’t touched all viewers yet.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QjmRMvNfjGA

Part 13 – Evil arm wrestling

As Dougie began channeling the good of his old self, Mr. C was left to channel 1987 Sylvester Stallone.

Stallone was playing a single father doppelganger of Rocky back in Over the Top, three years before Mr. C’s good doppelganger ever arrived at Twin Peaks. While Stallone was relatively restrained in arm wrestling foes to win custody of his son, Mr. C was in his usual Rambo mode in toying with a gang leader for custody of the treacherous Ray – all in front of his own evil son at that.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UAGBH8lQdRA

Part 14 – Monica Bellucci dream

Only Gordon Cole – and by extension, only David Lynch – would have a reality-blurring dream about dreams and reality set around a black-and-white tinted coffee date with screen siren Monica Bellucci. Yet to Albert’s relief and perhaps to ours, indulging Gordon/Lynch’s fantasies is only part of his latest dream.

Dream-Bellucci’s question “Who is the dreamer?” has only loomed larger over certain plots and realities in recent weeks. In addition, those who hadn’t already seen one of Phillip Jefferies’s major questions in Fire Walk With Me in a new light thanks to The Return had reason to think again.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MAFJdLRVfyU

Part 14 – Andy and The Fireman

It took five episodes, and maybe two or three too many, for the Twin Peaks sheriff’s department to follow Garland Briggs’s coordinates into Jack Rabbit’s Palace. No one could have fully predicted what they’d find, yet discovering the almost forgotten Naido in the woods and in our world was surely low on the list – to say nothing of Andy being the one sucked into the White Lodge.

At that point, the concept seemed like just another way to stall for time, given Andy’s less than stellar track record. Yet somehow, thanks to a download of back story from the Giant/Fireman, Andy remembered more than enough to do what had to be done, and to be ready for whatever is coming.

It also became a much needed reminder of the power of goodness, since the show and town had been bogged down in misery, broken relationships and unrelenting darkness for some time to that point. But through Andy’s simple but full heart, and his comfort towards Naido even as the skies opened up, it proved even the most ordinary, pure souls can be called upon and trusted to serve a greater purpose than ever imagined.

But in case that wasn’t enough, a 10-minute monologue from green gloved newcomer Freddie about his own encounter with The Fireman further drove it home.

Part 14 – Sarah Palmer feeds

Two straight disappointing episodes before this one were highlighted by bizarre, unsettling appearances from Sarah Palmer. Part 14 had already done much better in meeting Sarah’s level, just in time for Sarah – or whatever is residing inside her – to take it up another notch.

At long last, a harassed and long suffering Palmer got to stand up to a threatening man and then some, albeit with sinister implications. Of course, given that Sarah repeated her daughter Laura’s face removing trick first, one had to wonder which Palmer really pulled this off. Perhaps that may have a special need to be answered on Sunday night.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hggpOdM0RqM

Part 15 – Ed and Norma

Part 13 was a pretty big downer, both in quality and in how Lynch copied himself by revealing a beloved Twin Peaks couple was really separated after all. After pulling such a bait-and-switch with Bobby and Shelly in Part 11, he did it to Norma and the finally arriving Big Ed in Part 13. Yet in this case, at least, he had a plan to fix it.

In a bit of long overdue, rapturous fan service that would only be matched a week later in a Vegas hospital room, Lynch proved at least one happy ending was still possible in Twin Peaks – if only to pacify us before the next 45 minutes of death, electrocutions, Audrey freak outs and giant Phillip Jefferies tea kettles.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HGInmvuykdc

Part 15 – Get Gordon Cole

If Lynch was anyone else, and especially if he was a woman, more might question his ego in turning his own minor character into the new leading hero in a post-Cooper world. Yet in such a new world, it almost seems fitting that Gordon Cole is the biggest hero of all for Cooper and his suffering fans, even in a scene where he doesn’t show up.

Lynch famously named Gordon after a minor character in Sunset Boulevard, in a callback that enters legend when Dougie sees the film just in time to hear his old boss’s name, and to take action that’s 12 weeks in the making.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MeJeOIFTqAg

Part 15 – Goodbye Margaret

The possible end of Dougie inspired cheers from at least half the viewers. However, everyone was fully united in tears just minutes later, when another long expected but much more tragic goodbye was staged for Margaret Lanterman, a.k.a. the Log Lady, and a.k.a. Catherine Coulson.

Like Garland Briggs, Margaret was the inspiration for the Twin Peaks officers and others to uncover the mystery of Cooper, and tragically wouldn’t live to see it pay off. But unlike Don S. Davis and Briggs, Coulson survived just long enough to say her last goodbyes as Margaret in person, and to impart some final, mysterious but surely crucial warnings.

It was the end of an era not just for Twin Peaks, but for Lynch himself, as Coulson helped launch his career by assisting him on Eraserhead 40 years ago. In that moment, we could only follow Frank Truman’s lead and remove our hats to mark the passing of history.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4Kx9kYD3qpo

Part 16 – Tulpa Diane

Ever since Part 7, suspicions grew that Mr. C had both raped and impregnated two of the most important women in Cooper’s life. After Part 16 officially confirmed it in regards to Audrey and Richard Horne, Diane was finally ready to admit what he had done to her – but that was hardly the half of it.

Given the triggering text message Mr. C sent moments earlier, the gun in Diane’s purse, and Diane’s march towards the Blue Rose team while the ominous song from Mr. C’s very first scene played in the background, it set up to be a very different moment. Yet before the bullets flew, the tears, horror and game-changing reveals about Mr. C’s tulpa-creating powers hit hardest.

The Diane we knew was dead, and yet she still may live elsewhere, like Laura and another famed Twin Peaks femme.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5FT1t3Da7MM

Part 16 – Audrey’s dance

After three weeks of Audrey being stuck at home with an uncaring husband, having them in the Roadhouse at last was actually deflating. If she was in a real place like the Roadhouse, especially after a special Eddie Vedder performance, then all the best and most fantastical theories for her bizarre behavior had apparently been shattered.

All in all, it seemed like one last bitter Audrey related disappointment to cap off her puzzling return. And then her theme music started playing.

Then everyone swayed together to watch like zombies. Then some random unknown people got involved, like in many other seemingly pointless Roadhouse moments.

Then Audrey suddenly showed up in a white room, while some very Lodge-like electrical currents were crackling over her. Then a very Lodge-inspired reprisal of her dance music played over the credits. Then we had new reason to believe every Roadhouse scene and inexplicable A-list musical act, save for maybe three or four sequences, was just as fake as all of Audrey’s past scenes.

The rest can be explained on Sunday, or at least more than half of it hopefully will.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f2aHJN5my9I

Part 16 – 100% awake

Regardless of the full context of Audrey’s ‘awakening’, it was long overdue for those who didn’t understand, or even stand, the Audrey we’d seen to that point. It was far from the first example of such an awakening in that very same episode, only taken to much happier extremes, less ambiguity and much more fan friendly service in the case of Audrey’s former crush.

Yet the return of our Dale Cooper was an even greater miracle than that, if possible.

This became clear when one of his very first actions was to arrange a new Dougie Jones tulpa, for the family he would soon have to leave. As lost as he looked as Dougie for weeks, our Coop was very much inside him after all, and had clearly grown to love his/Dougie’s family after all. It might have seemed obvious to some earlier, but clearly not to all.

Such caring, awareness and love opened the door to suggest Cooper’s time as Dougie had not only fixed Mr. C’s evil in Vegas, but even healed Cooper in a way he couldn’t have been if he’d come back right away – and perhaps enough to defeat Mr. C with the perfect courage he didn’t have the first time.

If even the most ardent, impatient and bitter Dougie Jones hater such as this one can come to realize that now, then anything’s possible.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uT47hnhjDJ0

This includes signature moments that seemed like a lost cause to hope for just 2-3 weeks ago. Like this last one.

Part 16 – I am the FBI

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y5dRkActfIs

The list and the circle will be complete from 8-10 pm on Sept. 3.

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shirtlesssammy · 7 years

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Nightshifter: The Mandroid Recap

Then:

Police Department briefly considers hiring much better qualified fan artist, but then says “fuck it.”

(And shapeshifters are a thing!)

Breaking News:

Outside the City Bank in Milwaukee, WI, reporters standby as they watch a tense standoff between local police and unknown suspects.

Oh, snap. Dean Bean, what have you gotten yourself into now?

One Day Ago:

Our criminally minded Dean Bean is busy flirting (and interviewing) with a jewelry store clerk while Sam interviews another jewelry employee about a recent heist. A former employee was caught in the act of stealing merchandise. A security guard died while trying to stop her. She later killed herself. Frannie, the clerk Dean interviews, lets him know that she wouldn’t mind being interviewed in private sometime.

Dean has to think long and hard before deciding that, yep, that’s a great idea, and asks for her number.

The boys head out. Sam fills Dean in on a bank in Milwaukee getting robbed, much like the jewelry store. They reach the home of, Ronald Reznick, a security guard at the bank heist.

Ronald invites them in when they agree to hear his story of the events. Ronald instantly jumps into Fox Mulder levels of conspiracy shenanigans.

The person that Ronald let into the bank that night wasn’t who he said he was. “It had his face, but it wasn’t his face.” It’s a mandroid! Sam is skeptical, but Dean wonders about Ronald’s surety. So, Ronald pops in a copy of the security tape he keeps for backup, and shows the brothers the man with the laser eyes! Sam and Dean realize they’re dealing with a shapeshifter.

So, Sam puts on his best FBI face and tells Mr. Reznick that he’s wrong, the laser eyes is just a camera flair, and mandroids don’t exist. Dean is sympathetic, but to protect him, it has to be done. Sam gets the video surveillance before they head back to their own motel room, complete with a conspiracy board of their own. Dean is so soft towards Ronald, and wonders how Sam can impersonate an FBI agent so well. Sam makes it clear that it’s best the Ronald stay in the dark --and stay alive.

They track the shapeshifter’s underground path and discover another bank. They head out, in their best security guard service jumpers. They set up camp in the security camera room, and watch for the shapeshifter’s glowing eyes. Just as they’re losing hope, they find their monster --and Ronald Reznick.

While Ronald holds everyone at the bank hostage, Dean and Sam try to calm him down ---with little luck. He doesn’t trust them, wonders if they’re Men in Black, and makes a point to say he doesn’t like Sam. Dean tells Ronald that they believe him. And goddamnit, it’s been so long since I’ve seen this episode, but it’s a classic for a reason. This whole exchange between Dean and Ronald is so good. Ronald is so earnest in his beliefs -and he isn’t *really* wrong that something’s out there. And Dean knows exactly what to tell him to make him feel justified. Ronald agrees to take Dean to find the bank manager/shapeshifter, everyone else has to go in the vault. They don’t find the shapeshifter, just what’s left of him. “It’s so weird. Robot skin is so lifelike,” Ronald marvels. Dean lays down some truth, and locates a silver letter opener.

Meanwhile, the cops are on the case. They cut the power to the bank. Dean and Ronald are heading back to the vault when Ronald thanks Dean for helping him realize that he’s not crazy --mandroid theory aside.

Meanwhile, Sam is harassed by a fellow hostage inquiring about Dean while wearing one of his classic early season Ugly Shirts. The vault opens to reveal Dean, who lets more people into the vault--and lets Sam out. While Dean fills Sam in on the whereabouts of the shapeshifter, Sam reminds Dean that he’s wanted by the police, and the problem of escaping this situation. Dean wants to patrol the rest of the bank for others, while Sam watches Ron. Sam sees no hope for their captor, but Dean’s developed a soft spot for Ron.

Dean stalks the hallways while Sam cracks the vault door open to give the hostages air. A landline phone rings and Ron picks up the receiver and begins chatting cheerily to the cops. (He’s probably about a second away from telling them all about shapeshifter/mandroids.) Sam, aghast at Ron's stupidity, yells at him to hang up. In the vault, the guard starts having a heart attack so Sam calls back the SWAT team leader and asks for a paramedic.

Dean, meanwhile, finds a loose ceiling tile, jimmies it open, and a body falls through. Dean IDs the body as one of the hostages in the vault and heads back to Sam.

And here's when everything goes to (even more) shit.

Sam helps the guard and the shifter out of the vault, ostensibly to get the guard outside for medical attention. Sam takes the guard away while Dean tries to attack the shifter. Alas for Dean, the shifter gets the jump on him and runs off into the shadowed bank corridors. Ron, attempting to be helpful, ever so slowly trains his rifle on the retreating shifter. Unfortunately, Ron steps into view of the window and a sniper takes him out with one clean shot to the back.

The guard abandoned, Sam runs off into the depths of the bank after the shifter, scaring up sundry bank customers and employees as he goes.

Dean has a sorrowful moment with dead Ron, and tells him that he did a good job tracking the shifter. Then he escorts the guard to the doorway and sends him outside to get medical attention. He surveys the scene outside like a soldier, cataloging the swarming mess of cops, SWAT, reporters, and more. “We are so screwed,” he says, escaping back into the bank and relocking the door.

Sam finds the shifter's skin again in one of the stairwells and calls Dean with the update: the shifter’s in new a new form already. Dean starts to round up all the hostages while Sam continues his search of the back hallways.

Outside, the cops in charge find themselves supplanted by the FBI, led by Agent Victor Henriksen. They call in to the bank and Dean picks up the phone this time. Instead of being able to bluff for more time, Agent Henriksen identifies Dean by name. “It’s become my job to know about you, Dean. I’ve been looking for you for weeks now. I know about the murder in St. Louis, I know about the Houdini act you pulled in Baltimore. I know about the desecrations and the thefts. I know about your dad. Ex-marine, raised his kids on the road, cheap motels, backwood cabins. Real paramilitary survivalist type. I just can’t get a handle on what type of whacko he was. White supremacist, Timmy McVeigh...to-may-to, to-mah-to.”

“You got no right talking about my dad like that.” Dean tells him angrily, “He was a hero.” (Oh, Dean Bean. Terrible father, dedicated hunter. To-may-to, to-mah-to.)

(Side note: Jensen Ackles is so, so good in this phone conversation scene. Vulnerable, scared, and full of false bravado. UGH. JENSEN.)

Dean and Sam continue to search for the shifter when Sam finds a spot of blood in front of a door. When he opens it, the body of a bank teller falls out, her throat slit. They head back to the vault and ask bank teller Sherri to come with them. Sherri’s no dummy and asks to stay in the vault, thank you very much. Sam flashes his silver letter opener and Sherri heads out of the vault with them.

Sam and Dean bring her to the teller’s body when Sherri reacts...oddly. She completely flips out, starts screaming, and then passes out. The Winchesters look between the body and unconscious Sherri in confusion.

But hey, it’s cool. An unconscious shifter is easier to kill, right? Dean gets ready to stab her in the chest when Sam stops him. The dead body is actually breathing! Dead Sherri, a.k.a. the shifter, jumps up and starts fighting Dean while Sam gets the real Sherri away from the fight.

Meanwhile SWAT has moved into the bank. It’s a game of cat and mouse and cat now, with Dean and Sam hunting the shifter while SWAT hunts for them. The real Sherri escapes with a couple SWAT guys and will definitely have zero trauma or questions about her apparent evil twin.

Dean gets accosted by the shifter who continues to fight like a complete badass. He grabs her arm and skin peels away. (Shudder)

Finally, Dean overcomes the shifter and manages to stab her with the letter opener. She dies at last. So, problem one solved. He hears SWAT moving through the hallway nearby and crouches over the shifter’s body as one SWAT member enters the room, cornering him. (Future knowledge alert: it’s Sam! He took out a couple of SWAT guys earlier in the hallway.)

Cut to Agent Henriksen stalking the hallways as SWAT clears them one by one. We overhear two SWAT guys marveling over finding the shifter’s body. “I’m telling you, man. I just walked her out of the bank. She must have a twin sister or something.” (Somebody direct me to fan fiction where it’s just Sherri processing shit and trying to research her nonexistent twin sister. “Mom, why didn’t you tell me about our dark family secret?” “Tell you what?” “Stop lying, mom!” etcetera...)

Anyway, SWAT opens up a small room and finds two mostly naked SWAT members tied up and unconscious on the floor. Cut to two men in black tactical gear walking up the stairs of a parking garage. They head to the Impala, which is parked in a parking garage, and peel off their helmets and masks.

“We are so screwed,” Dean says while Renegade by Styx plays over the scene.

Natasha: GOD DAMN IT THIS FINAL SCENE. It’s so good. It’s one of my all-time favorite scenes from the entire series run. It’s such an excellent use of music - the perfect balance of desperation and badass.

I Never Knew I Had an Evil Quote:

A mandroid?

I like him. He says “okey dokey”.

We're not working for the mandroid!

I know about Sam, too. Bonnie to your Clyde.

Crazy's in there. And I just hung up on it.

You see, he’s got the laser eyes.

Robot skin is so lifelike.

#spn recap #spn rewatch #supernatural #spn 2x12 #nightshifter #dean winchester #sam winchester #ronald reznick #agent henriksen #supernatural season 2 #he was my ben edlund thing

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entergamingxp · 5 years

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DualShockers’ Favorite Games of 2019 — Scott’s Top 10

December 27, 2019 2:00 PM EST

2019 for me was filled with tons of games from different genres, and even though it was hard to pick 10, here are my favorites from 2019.

As 2019 comes to a close, DualShockers and our staff are reflecting on this year’s batch of games and what were their personal highlights within the last year. Unlike the official Game of the Year 2019 awards for DualShockers, there are little-to-no-rules on our individual Top 10 posts. For instance, any game — not just 2019 releases — can be considered.

Greetings and glad tidings, Shockerians? DualShockese? Sorry, I’m new, but yes it is the time of the year once again to share with the internet the video games that left a particularly large imprint on us throughout the past 365 days. My name is Scott White, and let my list be my humble debut on this fantastic site and introduction to you fine readers.

2019 treated audiences to titles that have been long desired, from Kingdom Hearts 3, Death Stranding, and of course, the Resident Evil 2 remake. The time between these behemoths was filled with other stellar titles from indie studios to large developers, rounding out the year and making it one with far too many games and myself with far too little free time for them all. However: I did play a bunch, so let me tell you about some of them!

As a brief note for readers: the first nine games I will list are in no particular order, but the final entry on this list will be my favorite of the year and noted as such.

Forager

What was a random suggestion on my Steam page turned into my go-to chill game of the year. With a bright and vivid cartoon pixel art style, Forager crafted its way into my heart. I found something incredibly peaceful and rewarding as I bought up the various islands faster than a land baron who struck oil, and worked to create my autonomous empire. With my army of drones collecting precious ore and gems, while my furnaces burned non-stop crafting new items, I could sit back and admire my work.

With the inclusion of many other indie darlings that you can dress your character up as (Shovel Knight, baby!) and flow of constant updates and additions from the single-man development team, Forager is a game that I keep coming back to, being charmed all the while.

Katana Zero

I have to say, I wasn’t expecting a dark narrative dealing with such heavy topics as PTSD, drug addiction, or child soldiers when I started playing Katana Zero. My sight zeroed *wink wink nudge* in on this game after watching the trailers with the neon visuals, the samurai who deflects bullets and mows down enemies, and the time-warping mechanic. What I ended up getting was so much more, and made me fall in love with this game.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Katana Zero.

Dragon Ball FighterZ

Yes, it’s an older game, but FighterZ has still been one of the games I’ve had the most fun with in 2019. With the drops of some of my friends and I’s favorite characters, my usual crew of friends were hopping into the lobbies and hurling beams at one another more than ever. With the recent release of the final Season 2 character with Dragon Ball Super’s Broly, there’s still no word on a Season 3 of new characters. You can count on it though, that if we do get another round of characters, there is a good chance you will see Dragon Ball FighterZ on my list next year, too.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Dragon Ball FighterZ.

Dragon Quest XI S: Echoes of An Elusive Age — Definitive Edition

Fact: Dragon Quest XI was one of my favorite games of 2018. Also fact, Dragon Quest XI S easily adds enough content and goodies to warrant being included on my list for 2019 too. With the addition of the orchestral track, new outfits, and a new game with the 2D version of XI included with all of its unique content, I gladly jumped back into the role of The Luminary. Any fans of RPGs and that own a Switch need to get this game.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Dragon Quest XI S: Echoes of An Elusive Age — Definitive Edition.

Daemon X Machina

As a longtime fan of From Software’s non-Soulsborne franchise, Armored Core, the lack of complex mech customization action titles as of late left me rabid for this game when it got announced. Fast-forward a couple of demos and a release later, Daemon X Machina fills the void left by AC’s disappearance this generation. The tense combat mixed with a visual style that separates it from the pack is just *chef’s kiss* muah. The added fact that I can now run around as Geralt of Rivia in a giant robot is just icing on the cake.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Daemon X Machina.

Resident Evil 2

Growing up, the Resident Evil series was always one that I wanted to play, as the lore and concept behind it was so intriguing to me. Alas though, it contained a foe scarier than Mr. X and more crushing than Nemesis: the dreaded “tank controls.” The releases of the remasters had solved this dilemma of mine with Resident Evil 0 and the first game, and with the RE2 remake release, I got to finally experience Leon and Claire’s origin.

This game should be placed on a pedestal with a beacon shining on it that never gets extinguished as an example of how remakes should be done. By everyone. Forever. It is simply a suburb horror title that nailed this vibe. The first time I was being chased by Mr. X remains the most nerve-wracking horror experience of 2019 for me. Bravo Capcom, bravo.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Resident Evil 2.

Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night

With magical whip in hand, I ventured forward into the night, vanquishing all manner of demonkind, skewering myself in the chest along the way to absorb the abilities of my foes. In a similar vein as Daemon X Machina scratched my mech itch, Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night gloriously scratched my Symphony of the Night itch. Plus, David Hayter is a demon-slaying samurai, so that instantly gives it +120 bonus points.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Bloodstained: Ritual of the Night.

Kingdom Hearts 3

In the convening years between the releases of Kingdom Hearts 2 in 2006 and Kingdom Hearts 3 this year, I evolved from a senior in high school who had no idea what he was doing, to a full-fledged adult…who has no idea what he is doing AND paying rent! What a decade it’s been.

I may have grown out of the raging hormones and living with my parents, but it turns out I have not grown out of the wide-eyed reaction to seeing Keyblades, Heartless, and Sora+Donald+Goofy Co. teaming up and vanquishing evil with the power of friendship and deus ex machina. It’s far from a perfect game, or even a perfect Kingdom Hearts game, but when a game makes me tear up from the title screen, there’s no way I couldn’t include it on my list. I love this game, this series, and all the craziness that comes with them. I can’t wait to see what lore-f***ery comes with the upcoming Re:Mind DLC in January.

Check out DualShockers‘ review for Kingdom Hearts 3.

Randomizers

Not relegated to a single game, but more a family of fan mods, this year saw me really dive into retro game randomizers. These nifty mods mix all sorts of stuff up inside a game–chest contents in Zelda as an example–to create new experiences in each playthrough. Whether it was having Kent in Fire Emblem rocking as Bard or Yoshi being King of Figaro with his twin brother Master Chief in Final Fantasy 6, these mods stole a lot of my time this year.

My Favorite Game(s) of the Year: Legend of Heroes: Trails of Cold Steel 1-3

Spending more than 250 hours with a cast of characters, experiencing their world, their struggles and triumphs this year, I’ve found myself completely enraptured by this series of RPGs. Imagine the materia system from Final Fantasy VII, the social bonding and links from the later Persona titles, and blend them together with a constantly expanding narrative, and you have Trails of Cold Steel.

I felt I had to include these games as a single entity on my list. So many moments of these games left me aghast; they lifted my spirits with hope and pained my heart with loss. This is a series that needs to be experienced by more people. I can only hope that 2020 will see the localization of the end of this saga with Cold Steel 4.

Check out the rest of the DualShockers staff Top 10 lists and our official Game of the Year Awards:

December 23: DualShockers Game of the Year Awards 2019 December 25: Lou Contaldi, Editor-in-Chief // Logan Moore, Managing Editor December 26: Tomas Franzese, News Editor // Ryan Meitzler, Features Editor December 27: Mike Long, Community Manager // Scott White, Staff Writer December 28: Chris Compendio, Contributor // Mario Rivera, Video Manager December 29: Scott Meaney, Community Director // Allisa James, Senior Staff Writer // Ben Bayliss, Senior Staff Writer December 30: Cameron Hawkins, Staff Writer // David Gill, Senior Staff Writer // Portia Lightfoot, Contributor December 31: Iyane Agossah, Senior Staff Writer // Michael Ruiz, Senior Staff Writer // Rachael Fiddis, Contributor January 1: Ricky Frech, Senior Staff Writer // Tanner Pierce, Staff Writer

December 27, 2019 2:00 PM EST

from EnterGamingXP https://entergamingxp.com/2019/12/dualshockers-favorite-games-of-2019-scotts-top-10/?utm_source=rss&utm_medium=rss&utm_campaign=dualshockers-favorite-games-of-2019-scotts-top-10

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spynotebook · 8 years

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Cult favorite TV series Twin Peaks is mainly about a very intuitive FBI agent chasing down a supernatural serial killer, but it’s best known for being incredibly, bafflingly strange. I mean, of course it is; it was created by David Lynch. To pass the time until show’s return on May 21, we counted our favorite WTF moments from the original series (in chronological order).

19) “Her name is Lil.”

The Fire Walk With Me movie was released after the show ended, but the events in the film take place before the TV show. Like, for instance, this freaky pantomime, which baffles the FBI agent played by Kiefer Sutherland, but which plays out in easy-to-interpret code for the agent played by Chris Isaak. Just don’t ask him about the blue rose.

18) “We’re not gonna talk about Judy at all.”

Agent Cooper doesn’t get a lot of screen time in the film (reportedly at the behest of Kyle MacLachlan). But this scene—featuring David Lynch himself as Cooper’s FBI boss, Gordon Cole, and David Bowie as a fellow agent whose mysterious behavior foreshadows Cooper’s later experiences in Twin Peaks—is one of Fire Walk With Me’s strangest sequences. And that’s saying a lot.

17) The Breakdancing Student

Blissfully unaware that her best friend has just been found dead and wrapped in plastic, Donna Hayward stops at her locker before the first class of the day in the show’s very first episode. For once, the mood is light at Twin Peaks High—and in that rare moment, a student we never meet (or see again) takes the opportunity to add some funky flair to the background of the scene. Why? Well... why not? (“Northwest Passage”)

16) “There was a fish in the percolator.”

This might be the only scene in all of Twin Peaks to feature bad coffee, a beverage so prized in the town that Showtime recently made a fun video collecting the show’s many caffeinated scenes. It’s a genuinely funny moment, also from the show’s first official episode, featuring one of Twin Peaks’ most quotable lines, and is also a perfect example of the show’s fondness for peppering its more serious moments—say, the early stages of a murder investigation—with non-sequiturs. (“Traces to Nowhere”)

15) “Let’s rock!”

Agent Cooper’s dreams and visions become important tools in cracking the Laura Palmer case, even if the remarkably open-minded Sheriff Truman has a hard time following along at first. Cooper’s first dream features footage that Twin Peaks junkies will recognize from the international version of the pilot, which was released theatrically with a longer ending that made it more of a stand-alone story. But more importantly, it also introduces the Man From Another Place. (“Zen, or the Skill to Catch a Killer”)

14) “This is the best damn sandwich I ever ate.”

His small stature doesn’t diminish his dancing skills, nor his baffling ability to talk in riddles both forward and backwards These “red room” scenes have become an iconic part of Twin Peaks, both visually and thematically, but their off-putting vibes feel just as potent every time you see them.

Pie may be the signature treat of Twin Peaks—followed closely by donuts—but the show has plenty of foodie moments that don’t take place at the Double R Diner. Case in point: the above scene introducing the gourmet-loving Jerry Horne, just back from Paris with a suitcase full of brie-and-butter sandwiches, which his brother Ben samples with near-orgasmic delight. (“Zen, or the Skill to Catch a Killer”)

13) “I’m gonna turn it upside down!”

Dana Ashbrook’s performance as Bobby Briggs is extremely oversized, particularly in the first half of Twin Peaks’ first season, and especially when he’s confronted by authority figures like Sheriff Truman, Agent Cooper, or—as in this scene—his father, the stiffly formal Major Briggs. The funeral in question is, of course, for Laura Palmer—Bobby’s girlfriend, with whom he had a fraught relationship. And he does indeed turn it upside down, berating the assembled mourners (“Everybody knew she was in trouble, but we didn’t do anything!”) and nearly starting a graveside fistfight. Emotions run high in Twin Peaks, but Bobby’s run higher than most. (“Rest in Pain”)

12) Cooper Meets a Llama

While investigating a typically offbeat lead that might hold the key to discovering Laura’s killer, Agent Cooper and Sheriff Truman visit a veterinary clinic that could only have carved from the imagination of David Lynch. To Cooper’s credit, even when he’s confronted by “the beast incarnate,” he doesn’t miss a beat. (“The One-Armed Man”)

11) The Great Northern Dance-Off

Laura Palmer’s father, Leland, deals with his grief in strange ways. He’s very big on singing and wailing, but here we see him crack up on the dance floor at an important investment presentation. As portrayed by Ray Wise, Leland is equal parts campy, pitiful, and creepy—and this scene in particular is very, very unsettling. You want to laugh, but you know that you shouldn’t, especially when you see Audrey Horne sobbing at how goddamn awful everything is. (“Cooper’s Dream”)

10) Audrey’s Job Interview for One Eyed Jacks

Speaking of Audrey, she lands her gig working at a Canadian brothel by showing off a very special and strange talent to its skeptical madam. This became one of Twin Peaks’ signature moments—and the scene was later parodied on Saturday Night Live’s take-off on the show, in which an actress pretends to tongue a piece of ribbon into an elaborate gift-wrapping bow. (“Realization Time”)

9) The Great Northern Dance-Off, Part Two

At the start of season two, Leland’s hair has gone completely white, and his mind has continued to deteriorate. This time, however, the Horne brothers react to his strange behavior with even stranger behavior of their own.

As an aside, later in this episode, we see a tuxedo-clad Leland spontaneously perform “Get Happy” at a dinner party at the Hayward house. But that’s not even the weirdest part of that particular scene—that honor goes to the first and (so far) only appearance of Alicia Witt as the youngest Hayward sister, dressed as a fairy princess and displaying her child-prodigy skills on the piano. As you do. (“May the Giant Be With You”)

8) Creamed Corn

After Donna takes over Laura’s Meals on Wheels route—more for purposes of playing detective rather than any desire to actually help people—she meets a little boy and an old woman. One is a magician-in-training, while the other has very specific feelings about creamed corn. A teeny bit more context for this odd pair would come later in the series, as well as in Fire Walk With Me. (We also eventually learn a bit more about the significance of creamed corn.) But this first introduction is startlingly bizarre. (“Coma”)

7) “Deliver the message.”

No list of Twin Peaks’ weirdest moments can exclude the Log Lady. Really, you can choose any of her scenes. But this one, involving Project Blue Book’s own Major Briggs, is primo Margaret. (“Coma”)

6) “Cooper, you remind me today of a small Mexican chi-wow-wow.”

Cooper’s hard-of-hearing boss, Gordon Cole (again played by Lynch), shows up in Twin Peaks to deliver some important information at top volume. Apropos of nothing, however, he makes this observation. Cooper brings it up later, but we never get an explanation. Of course we don’t. (“Demons”)

5) Nadine Joins the Twin Peaks High Wrestling Team

Nadine Hurley is one of Twin Peaks’ most oddball characters right from the start, displaying super-strength and having a crazed obsession with inventing the world’s first silent drape runners. But after she attempts suicide, she awakens thinking she’s 18 again. Though this delusion negatively affects her marriage—which, to be fair, was already in trouble—her muscle power grows even more baffling, leading to a very odd interlude in which a middle-aged woman joins the local high school wrestling team. Frankly, Mike, a generally unlikable character who was underused after the show’s first few episodes, had it coming. (“The Black Widow”)

4) Ben Horne’s Civil War Re-enactment

The eccentric proprietor of the Great Northern Hotel, one of season one’s keenest schemers, drifts over the edge in season two when he becomes fixated on the Civil War. He’s eventually cured thanks to Dr. Jacoby and the help of his family and friends when they implement “the Appomattox scenario,” which wraps up an awful lot like The Wizard of Oz. (“Slaves and Masters”)

3) Josie and the Drawer

By this point in the show, master of deception Josie Packard has begun to realize she’s doomed to be at the mercy of the men in her life who are desperate to control her. Soon after we learn that Josie is the one who shot Cooper back at the end of season one, more gunplay ensues. But she doesn’t die from a bullet—instead, she has some kind of medical episode and Bob appears, asking, “Coop! What happened to Josie?” Well, Bob, this is what happens:

As best as we can tell, Josie’s punishment was to have her soul banished into a drawer knob at the Great Northern. Her fate is never elaborated upon much more than that. (“The Condemned Woman”)

2) “Grand theft auto!”

By its final episode, Twin Peaks had become extremely wrapped up in its own mythology. But in between all the messages from outer space and secret doorways in the woods and tarantula traps and beauty pageants, there’s still room for a classic Pete Martell interjection—as in this moment, after he mistakes a disguised Windom Earle for the Log Lady. (“Beyond Life and Death”)

1) “How’s Annie?”

“He can’t ask for your soul,” Bob explains to Agent Cooper in the Black Lodge, speaking of Agent Cooper’s evil ex-partner Earle. “I will take his.” Which version of Cooper (the good guy, or his evil twin) emerges from the Black Lodge with Annie? The very last scene of season two makes it pretty clear.

For the record, Annie “is going to be just fine,” according to Sheriff Truman in a conversation that takes place just before this. As for Agent Cooper—well, Twin Peaks returns to the airwaves May 21 for an 18-episode season on Showtime. Let’s hope we have lots of weird new moments to savor. (“Beyond Life and Death”)

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