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#this reading is something i've had a slightly hard time doing
ahgasegotarmy116 · 2 days
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Just Take It | Jeon Jungkook | Part 7
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Summary: Your friend "date" with Jungkook is interesting but thankfully the events from this morning don't prevent you from having a good time. Pairing: Inexperienced f!reader x Best Friend's Dad Jungkook (20 year age gap) Word Count: 3.8K (I'm sorry it's short but I wanted to get it out since it's been way too long) Warnings: No real warnings other than slightly jealous and possessive Jungkook (but we all know that's a good warning 🤭) a/n: It's been fucking four months I'm so sorry 😭 It's been so hard for me to update my series recently since my attention span literally sucks right now so one shots have been a lot easier to get out but hopefully some of you guys are still around to read this story 🥲 p.s. the last third of this isn't edited at all so please ignore any nonsense 😅
After Jungkook and I finally agree on an outfit for me to wear we head off to whatever mysterious location he's taking us to. 
"You gonna pout all the way there?" he teases, pointing out my crossed arms and legs and the fact that I haven't spoken to him since we left. "I told you I hate surprises" I grumble, the feeling of the unknown making me uncomfortable. 
"You've gotta live a little Darling" he teases and goes back to driving. He hands me his phone that's plugged into the aux as a sign for me to put on a playlist and that brings up my mood right away. He chuckles when he sees me put on my favorite song since he knows that music always lifts my spirits.
"You're never gonna get tired of this song are you?" he sighs, this being the twelfth time he's asked. "Nope" I answer, popping the 'p' at the end. "This song came out when you were two years old" he chuckles, trying to clue me in but I don't pay any mind to it. "All the more reason to like it!" I argue back and he shakes his head.
"Perfect Man by Shinhwa is a masterpiece and I will accept no arguments" I say, making my statement on the matter final. 
There's a quiet air that's hung between us for a couple moments before when both bust out laughing. "I swear we never fail to have the same conversation every time I play this song" I point out and he smiles.
"That's because I love watching you defend something with your whole being. It's cute" he says and my throat gets dry. 
This being the first semi flirty comment he's thrown at me since everything happened. Well, besides commenting on how I look because who wants to be told nothing after putting on a cute outfit, even when he's the one who's chosen it. 
His comments have been nothing but respectful so there's no harm in letting him do as he pleases but it's just making this whole friends ordeal a lot harder.
~~~~~~
As we pull up to the place he had kept a secret from me I realize why he had me wear this specific outfit since from the looks of it we've come to some sort of ropes course. 
"I've never been to one of these" I say, marveling at the zip lines, ropes, ladders and pulley systems that are strewn about this forested area.
"Do you wanna give it a try? We can always just go to the restaurant they have here but I thought I would still offer it since I told you I had something fun planned for us" he offers, leaving the choice up to me but I nod my head immediately, really wanting to try it out. 
"Yeah?" he chuckles when he sees my excitement grow. "Yes! Come on let's go!" I say, grabbing his hand and trying to drag him along.
"Wait a second Bunny" he chuckles, holding me back and I watch him as he opens the trunk and grabs a big hoodie for me to wear. "So we don't mess up that pretty little top you're wearing" he says and the playfulness around the statement making my heart skip a beat. 
"I could've brought my own" I say but he shakes his head in protest. "It's easier this way so you don't have to worry about it getting dirty, now arms up" he says and I furrow my brow. "Jungkook I can put it on myself" I laugh but he doesn't find it amusing. "I know, arms up" he orders and I do as he says, laughing at the no doubt comical sight of him struggling with it. 
"You know now that I think about it it's a lot easier to take your clothes off than it is to put them on" he casually says, making me wack him in the arm once the hoodie is on properly. "Friends Jungkook. Or I can go back to calling you Mr. Jeon" I say with an arched brow and he chuckles. "Friends" he agrees and closes the trunk.
"So can we go now?" I ask, glancing over at the course before looking back to him for approval. "Yes Bunny go ahead" he says, giving me the go ahead and following after me as I make a bee line for the equipment room. 
"Hi!" I say excitedly to the guy at the counter when it's my turn to check us in. "Hey, first time?" he chuckles, me looking around at everything with a childlike wonder in my eyes. "Yeah! I honestly didn't even know a place like this existed around here" I admit, Jungkook again taking me to a place I had never been before. 
I guess he really is determined to take all of my firsts. 
"Well I hope you'll come around more often then, there's a whole lot more to experience than just these ropes" he says and in my awestruck state I don't notice the suggestive tone behind his wording. 
"You find something you like?" he asks, my sight going past him and looking at all the harnesses. "I have a friend that's coming in a second so do you think you could get us two?" I ask while pointing at them. 
"Sure, is your friend as pretty as you are?" he asks and before I can even think of a response someone is interrupting our conversation. "I would think so" I hear a deep voice say behind me, his hand placed on my hip in a slight possessive manner making my breath hitch. 
The boy's eyes widen a bit, looking at the dynamic between the two of us and doesn't exactly know what to make of it and decides to go find harnesses for the both of us. 
"What was that?" I ask, whipping around and glaring up at him. "What? We agree to be friends for a little while and suddenly you're ready to jump ship?" Jungkook says, crossing his arms and watching as the boy not so casually glances over at us. 
"He was just being friendly" I scoff, knowing for a fact that he wasn't but playing into this oblivious act I had accidentally fallen into. "Right...friendly" he says in a monotone, not wanting to get into a senseless argument and taking the high road. I don't miss the way his hand balls into a fist for a second before relaxing it once I've decided to drag him over to look at the little souvenirs they have in the shop. 
"Alright here's a harness for you, and one for you sir." the employee says, a flirtatious tone in his voice when he addresses me and a more strict and professional voice when he addresses Jungkook. 
"Did you want some help putting that on?" the boy asks, clearly just taking it as a chance to get closer to me since Jungkook's slight display of possessiveness of me wasn't a big enough clue that we may...or may not be together. "Oh no that's okay, I'm sure you've got other things to do" I deny, stepping into it on my own and in true y/n fashion I end up tripping over one of the straps. 
"Careful Darling" Jungkook says, steadying me on my feet and when I look back over at the boy he's awkwardly frozen with his arms out, having intended to help me but decided against it since he was smart enough to realize that it might not be the smartest idea. 
I look between the boy and Jungkook and see how Jungkook hasn't stopped glaring at him no matter how uncomfortable the boy is. "Looks like you've got other customers to help" Jungkook says, nodding towards the people at the counter, clearly looking to check in just as we did. 
"Right, well let me know if you need anything" he responds, his focus completely on me as he relays his message. "I will" Jungkook jumps in and the boy nervously glances between the two of us before heading over to the counter and helping the group of four that just came in. 
"Was that really necessary?" I ask, my arms crossed over my chest as Jungkook tightens the harness on me, making sure I won't need any 'help' with it later. "He was trying way too hard and he clearly couldn't get a clue about us" he says, his glare still prevalent in his direction. 
"Jungkook there isn't an 'us' right now okay" I say and he sighs. "Keep on telling yourself that" he mumbles quite enough that I couldn't make it out when another crowd comes in. "What was that?" I ask but he quickly brushes it off and herds me out of the store before it gets even more crowded. 
As we wait for the group to now gather in the waiting area outside neither of us have spoken a word to each other, stealing glances every so often since we just can't help it. We're attracted to each other and from my point of view I don't think that's gonna change anytime soon. 
"Alright everyone can I get you all gathered over here?" that same guy from inside the shop calls out and we all do as he says with Jungkook cursing under his breath. "Fucking fantastic, he's our leader" he grumbles but I grab him by the arm and drag him so we can catch up with the group. 
"Come on I thought you said this was supposed to be fun" I say and he sighs, collecting himself and slowly changing his attitude. "Alright I'm sorry Darling" he says, not dragging his feet or sulking anymore and putting that nonsensical jealously out of his head...at least for right now. 
"Alright welcome welcome everyone to BranchBound Adventures! How's everyone doing today?" he asks and we all let out cheers of excitement but what I don't notice is the way that Jungkook looks at me with a soft smile when he realizes again how much I'm loving this already. He takes a mental note to bring me here again soon so he can watch that same childlike excitement bloom again. 
"Excellent, looks like we've got a fun group here today! Well my name is Jayson and this is Kimberly and we're gonna be your BranchBound Buddies, sound good?" he says and I can't ignore the way Jungkook snorts at the title they've been given but it's only loud enough for me to hear thankfully. 
"Behave!" I scold, not wanting to turn this into some sort of immaturity contest when he knows damn well he's a grown ass adult and he should not be acting like this. He holds his hands up in surrender when he sees my glare but can't help but smirk at the fact that Jayson as we've recently found out his name is watching our exchange. 
As the day goes by and we're close to the end of our little ropes course adventure Jayson decides it's now or never and decides to make another move. 
"You've done a great job today! Didn't know you would be so good with ropes" he says, not hiding the fact that he's probably imagining using these ropes on me in a completely different context. "Yeah I didn't know I would be either" I chuckle and look over and see Jungkook glaring daggers into Jayson's forehead while he hooks me up to the zip line.
"Did you want to go nice and slow or fast?" he asks, his eyes drinking me in but I don't pay him any mind as I just watch the way that Jungkook is reacting to our exchange. "Y/n?" Jayson asks, breaking me out of the trance I had been lost in, thinking about what Jungkook would do to me after this if we were together. 
"Sorry what?" I ask and I can tell that he's pretty much starting to get the memo at this point. "Nothing, just tuck your legs in close to you if you want to go faster" he explains and I nod my head and wait while Jungkook gets hooked up to the other line thats parallel to mine. 
"Wanna race?" I challenge him since I know he would never back down from one. "What do I get if I win?" he says with a smirk.
"Whatever you want..." I say nervously and I have a feeling I'm going to regret that. "...but I want ice cream if I win!" I say to wipe away the tension but he brings it right back with his claim if he wins.
"I want a kiss" he says and when he clearly sees the way that I'm gearing up to protest a simple cock of his brow silences that. "You said that I could have anything I want right?" he asks I sigh and nod, my energy to go back on my word dissipating. 
It's just one kiss right?
"Deal" I agree and he can't hold back the smile and vote of confidence it gives him. "Get ready to lose" he says and before I have a chance to argue back Kimberly is counting us off and in my semi scattered state Jungkook takes off before me giving him a ten second head-start. 
"No fair!" I call after him when I'm finally able to catch up and he let's out a hearty laugh. "You're the one who proposed this whole race Bunny" he says making me look away, 'his timing with that nickname is always impeccable', I think to myself as I hide my blush.
"Hurry up!" I hear him call out as he is suddenly a lot further down the line than I am. "Hey!" I laugh, deciding to put that thought away to not sour my mood and just focus on there here and now. 
Once I finally get to the end Jungkook has already gotten unhooked from the zip line and is standing victorious waiting to claim his prize. 
"You only won because you're taller than me" I grumble as if I'm actually upset that he won when in fact the thought of him putting in effort just to kiss me make my heart beat faster. "I thought smaller things were supposed to be more aerodynamic" he teases in response but I huff and stand in front of him, clearly waiting for him to claim his reward. 
"I didn't say when I was going to kiss you" he teases and walks away and back toward the shop where we had first come from since our time is up. "Hey!" I protest again, not liking the slight embarrassment he caused me. 
"Oh come on you'll be okay" he teases as he takes his harness off and then helps me out of mine after. "Whatever" I huff and something behind me catches his eye and before I'm able to turn around he's knocking me off my feet and giving me a rather over exaggerated kiss if you ask me to the point that people are whistling and hyping us up.
I hit on his chest when I'm finally running out of air and he carefully puts me back on my feet and when I catch the sight of Jayson staring at us with an unreadable expression on his face I know now why he did that. 
"You're insufferable" I huff and fix my rumbled clothes from his breathless kiss but he doesn't seem bothered in the slightest. "Interesting response after receiving a kiss that made you blush but I'll take it" he shrugs and we both head back into the gift shop for the last time so Jungkook can no doubt flaunt the fact that from Jayson's point of view we're together. 
Honestly I could care less and I won't deny that it was hot as fuck watching him get angry with the very minimal interactions Jayson and I had but I won't let him have that satisfaction. "Didn't realize you were so insecure" I taunt and make sure his eyes are on me before I look over to where Jayson is still clearly watching us and give him a flirty wave goodbye with Jungkook hurrying to usher me out. 
"I wouldn't be insecure if you were mine already so until then you'll have to be patient with me" he says through gritted teeth, a reaction I was hoping for from that little stunt I pulled. "I can manage" I say and walk off towards the only restaurant here where I'm sure he was planning on taking me and when he follows me and has a hand placed low on my waist to guide me there my suspicions are confirmed. 
"Reservation for Jeon" he says to the host at the front desk and while he looks for it Jungkook's demeanor is a little softer, that soft maturity coming back from having us in a controlled and relaxed environment. "Right this way Mr and Mrs. Jeon" the host says and I practically choke on air at that, the title mistakenly given to me sending my heart into overdrive. 
"Don't worry she's fine, come on Honey" Jungkook reassures the waiter as Jungkook encourages me along to follow him to our table. 
Once we're seated our waiter comes by immediately to bring us water since I had clearly caused enough of a spectacle to garner a hurried solution for my coughing fit. He gives us our menus as well soon after and leaves us be, allowing me some more space to compose myself. 
Jungkook can't hide the smile he's had since my reaction had started and has turn slightly smug at seeing the blush it had caused me. "Shut up" I grumble and take another gulp of water having traded his glass for mind since I had practically drank mine in one go after that. 
"I didn't say anything" he chuckles leaving me glaring at him. "But your face did" I say after having put my almost empty glass back down on the table. "Oh yeah? And what is it saying now?" he asks, leaning forward as if he was giving me a better look at it. 
"It's saying that you're enjoying the fact that I'm still squirming over the thought of being called Mrs. Jeon" I say and he sits back, proud of my intuition. "Impressive Bunny. Better get used to it though" he says cockily and I narrow my eye at him and scoff. 
"You're pretty confident for someone I technically haven't agreed to date" I say but his smirk widens before throwing out a playful 'Yet' and our waiter is back at our table before I have a chance to argue back. 
After the waiter has taken our order and a little while after is bringing out our food our conversations have gone back to what had been seen as normal for us. A slight flirty edge to his words which I not so subtly glare at in response always making him chuckle but it's getting harder and harder for me to want to do that.
Why should I scold him? It's not like I don't want him too...
As we finish up the day with the ice cream I technically did not earn we start to make our way back to his car where he opens the door for me and make it a point to put on my seatbelt so I can still enjoy the cone I'm almost finished with. 
"Thanks Dad" I tease after he's buckled me in like a child and I'm granted a sarcastic smile in return only making me smile harder. He closes the door and gets in on his side and soon we're on our way back to the house...
~~~~~
The ride back is quiet, comfortable but quiet with the only sound being the hum of my playlist coming through the speaker and the gusts of cool air coming through the vents but it's soon broken by the question he's been wanting to ask. 
"Did you have fun?" it's a simple question but I know thoughts of what had happened earlier today are coming back to him as we get closer and closer to the house. "I did, a lot actually. You're not too shabby at planning dates" I confirm and he glances over with a smirk. 
"I thought this wasn't a date?" he counters and I chuckle. "It wasn't until you kissed me" I say and he shakes his head. "A kiss equals a date, got it" he says quietly, tucking that information into his back pocket and I can't help but smile as I see a soft one still rests on his lips. 
~~~~
When we finally pull into the driveway and he turns off the engine I hold onto his arm for a second, asking him to stay in the car for a second so he does and sits back and keeps his eyes on me, waiting for what I have to say.
The thing is is that I don't know what to say, I don't even know why I asked him to stay in here but he just watches me fondly, not rushing anything and waiting patiently for me. 
"I don't think we can be friends" I say, looking down at my lap so I can't see the expression he has on his face. "What do you mean by that Bunny?" he asks, that nickname making my heart skip a beat like it does every time and I shake my head, still looking down at my lap. "I mean, I don't wanna be friends" I say hoping he'll understand and when he lifts my chin I expect him to ask me to explain what I mean but instead I'm met with his lips on mine.
They're not full of passion or lust or anything of the sort. Just pure longing and understanding, understanding of the want to go about things at my own pace, an understanding that he's okay with going slow and that's all I need. 
"We can go slow" he says after we've broken the kiss, audibly confirming what he had physically displayed and I bite back a smile and nod before placing a soft kiss on his lips. 
"Thank you" I whisper and he pulls away to get a better look at me. "Whatever for?" he asks in such a cute way I can't help but laugh. "For not forcing me or making me feel bad about my indecision" I say and he smiles and cups my face, brushing his thumb along my cheekbone, a sad smile on his face at the thought of what I might've gone through with Jared that would require that sense of relief from his actions. 
"I'm sorry about this morning" I say even softer this time and he nods, "I know" and those two words bring me comfort in ways that he couldn't understand even if I told him.
I was scared shitless that I had messed things up, that I had done something that could've damaged us beyond repair but his words and actions from today told me nothing of the sort. 
His maturity shows that he knows what he wants and I want to open up and show him that in return...but I just hope I won't regret it.
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bianca-mii · 3 days
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One of the most iconic kisses between our guitarists from the 2022 tour. I can't write as beautifully as @woodswallow, but I made this gifset as I thought there is a very interesting thing to point out.
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The Auslaender outro started almost as usual, with Richard feeling the music probably somewhat more.
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But this moment shows one massive difference from arguably every other Auslaender's kiss: Richard is not smiling. He's not focused on seducing Paul with that evil grin. There's no tension, no predatory stare. He is... sad? He looks Paul in the eye, and while Paul is in that playful-teasing-I'm-not-that-easy-to-get mode of his, in which he rather avoids eye contact with Richard, he must realize something is off with the lead guitarist...
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But they both go for the kiss. In the beginning, I thought maybe Richard was sad, at least partially, because during some of the 2022 shows Paul seemingly didn't feel like having that little smooch. From what I've read, Paul is very uncomfortable with PDA and, in general, tries to keep his private life as far from the public eye as possible. 2019 kisses were fun and outrageous, which Paul loves, and also had a political impact. But by the half of the 2022 tour, it was obvious nobody cared about any political impact anymore and the guitarists kissed just because they like it. Richard doesn't care if people are watching, he may even like it better that way, so perhaps he couldn't entirely understand Paul's hesitation. Also, on the previous show, still in Europe, their kiss was very quick, too quick for Richard's liking:
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He made that gesture with his mouth as if he wanted to say: "Ahh, it ended before I could even taste it!" On which Paul said something, maybe like: "I've told you already: quick pecks - for the audience, the actual kisses - only you and me, no witnesses..." And Richard was like: "Oh, okay, but a boy can dream, can't he?"
Going back to Chicago's kiss: so it's not the case that Richard is sad because he thinks Paul wants no public kisses: they go for it as usual. I also don't think he's sad because he'd prefer the kiss to be longer - that doesn't sound like an actual reason to feel sad. It has to be something else.
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Whatever it is, Richard tries to pull away first as he probably thinks the kiss will be over by that time anyway. Indeed, it's usually been (if not any other time) Paul who pulls away first; I also think Richard's hand on the back of Paul's neck used to be there for that extra control, to keep him in place just a little bit longer, but it wasn't hugely sufficient. This time though, again, Richard thinks the kiss will be over just after a moment. But what happens next? Especially from this angle, it seems very clear: Paul doesn't let go. And his reaction is really intense: he keeps his lips locked with Richard's, his right hand, put on Richard's shoulder, grabs it more firmly; you can see all his body leaning on his partner; if you look at his butt, it slightly goes up as he maybe even gets on tiptoe.
I remember reading suggestions Richard was that surprised because maybe Paul slipped him some tongue. I'd love to think that, but what I believe really happened was that Paul sucked hard on Richard's lip to keep their mouths together as Richard tried to pull away.
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This is not the best quality, but it sort of confirms that theory: you can briefly see Richard's mouth, and then how it literally gets sucked:)
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Paul pulls away when it's over but also slightly pushes Richard: "now, that should do!", but Richard, despite experiencing a massive WTF?! moment, remains sober enough to put some pressure on Paul's nape, doesn't let him go, and pulls him back close again, for a hug. He also starts to laugh so heartily that it makes my heart melt. Perhaps he's realized what face he's just made and laughs, just a little bit, at himself too. Paul, on the other hand, briefly returns the hug, but then is all like: "there, there, don't overdo it, babe." He gives Richard a few pats on the back, like the male friends with no benefits would do - he is back into his no PDA mode, and puts his right hand back on Richard's shoulder, this time trying to push him away.
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But now Richard does not have it: "nah love, not so fast, you should have expected now I need to thank you for what you've just done... *mwah*". Another kiss on the lips, brief one this time, and finally Paul can go, obviously showing to everybody: "look! Just look at this little naughty thing right there!", Richard is doing something similar for a moment, too (what a complete pair of dorks:D).
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So, I imagine Richard was so surprised because Paul not only didn't want to end the kiss quickly but literally forced it to be longer. I love this moment so much for two reasons: it totally makes sense Paul is uncomfortable with PDA, but as soon as Richard feels worse, or Paul gets sentimental himself (like by the end of tours), Paul stops thinking about any discomfort and goes for it with no hesitation, which pretty much says that comforting Richard is simply much more important for him. I think we saw it here, we saw it during Puppe 2023 or this tour after the German football team lost.
What I also more than love, is how Paul's little mouth-to-mouth treatment really brings Richard back to life and turns the night into the day for him (no wonder, who wouldn't be more than alive if they just got a kiss from Landers himself?). Richard is over the moon here, and seeing him undergo such a 180-degree mood switch is an almost otherwordly experience...
Here's the whole video cropped by me, original credit to till_lindemann_pics on ig. One of the other gifs by @davecumstaine, the other one - I can't tell, I downloaded it a long time ago and can't find it here anymore, many apologies;(
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Hello! I found this small but really interesting ask about some comments Alya made in Origins about Adrien that Imthepunchlord answered a long while ago, and I’d love to also hear your thoughts on the points that they and the asker brought up! Please feel free to put your thoughts directly in a reblog if you like the post enough to add to it instead of answering this ask since that would probably be convoluted.
https://imthepunchlord.tumblr.com/post/651542468774526976/i-just-rewatched-origins-and-i-cant-stop
(link to the post in question)
I don't have much to add. @imthepunchlord summed the issue up really well at the end of their post, "what is 'in character' is up for debate most of the time."
These kinds of character analysis questions just aren't possible in Miraculous. The characters are wildly inconsistent, so you're not taking a well crafted story and pointing out how it all flows together. You're taking a slapdash story and twisting yourself into a pretzel to try to make it all make sense. Hard pass. That's why I just focus on the character's core and ignore a lot of the nonsense that canon pulls. It's not that I want to deny canon. It's that you cannot embrace all of canon and write a good story.
However, you all know that I love to play fix it, so let's give Alya some sugar and talk about how you can write her character to make her reactions to Adrien make a little more sense. I don't think that canon has thought her through this much, but this approach really fits her character and I love it! For those who don't want to follow the link to the original ask, we're looking at this bit of dialogue:
Marinette: Okay. I get it. Good job, you three. Very funny. Adrien: No, no, I was just trying to take this off! Marinette: Oh, really? You're friends with Chloé, right? Adrien: Why do people keep saying that? (Marinette huffs; he goes to his seat) Chloé: Now do you see what I mean about respect? Marinette: I know I've seen him somewhere before. (sees images of Gabriel and Adrien Agreste on Alya's cellphone) Of course! He's the son of my fave fashion designer, Gabriel Agreste! Alya: Daddy's boy, teen supermodel, AND Chloé's buddy? Ha! Forget it.
And trying to make sense of how Alya goes from this to being the head of team Adrienette. The obvious answer is that something happens off screen between Origins and the main part of canon, but let's go a little deeper than that.
A lot of people approach Alya as a reporter. A truth seeker. A fact finder. That approach isn't wrong, it may even be how canon wants you to read her, but it's not the approach that I like to take. Whenever I have time to really flesh Alya out, I go a slightly different route.
To me, Alya is a story teller. She wants the stories she tells to be accurate, but she can easily get caught up in a narrative and forget to take a moment to check her facts. A good reporter watching the above exchange would go, "If Adrien is a bully, then why did he protest his innocence? What's the real story? Who can I talk to in order to get the facts?"
A story teller may still do that, but they may also take Chloé's earlier bullying along with Adrien being Chloé's friend and come up with a very believable story about Adrien being "Daddy's boy, teen supermodel, AND Chloé's buddy." It fits the facts that the story teller knows and they don't have a reporter's instinct question everything. They'll only start to question their version of the story once a hard fact pops up that goes against the story.
The reason I like this approach is that Alya is the chosen of Illusions. That's not a great fit for a truth seeker. Illusions is a much better fit for someone who is drawn to stories. A person who values the truth, but who isn't driven by it. A good reporter is driven by truth. A good story teller is driven by the call of a good story.
If we take that approach and look at Alya's actions in Origins, then we see that she had a story in her head and was happy to fit the pieces into that story until Adrien did something that no longer fit the story. That's when the "ask questions, get the real story" instinct kicked in, leading her to discover that she'd misjudged Adrien. It would have been nice to see that happening on screen, but Origins didn't have time for that so we're just left wondering what changed Alya's mind and making up various stories to explain it.
You can also take Origins and use it as the start of an arc where Alya learns to be a better reporter by not jumping to conclusions since she does a lot of jumping to conclusions in season one (and even does it on occasion in later seasons). But you don't need to give every character a strong character arc like that and I enjoy letting Alya be solid as-is. I tend to tone down her jumping to conclusions issues and make her more open to giving things a second look.
This is extra true because Marinette has a pretty clear problem with snap judgments, so I don't want her and Alya to have the same flaw. I want Alya to be more unique in her flaws. It's not that she jumps to conclusions, it's that she's a little too quick to stop asking questions once she has a believable narrative. It's in the same vein as Marinette, but still it's own thing. It's also still a flaw that Alya needs to work on, but in a more nuanced way where it also acts as a strength under the right circumstances such as when she's in the field and needs to come up with illusions on the fly.
I cannot say if this is what canon is trying to do with Alya. The bones of this read are there, but the bones of the reporter read are also there. I just like this read more. It doesn't drastically change Alya, it's just a minor nuance that makes her fit into her place in the story with a little more grace.
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tuliptic · 2 years
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FS: but make it Financial Stability
I believe those who have trouble with finances may have thought about this, how to achieve financial stability, when will it happen, and more questions about this topic. Cuz, same, I still have trouble with my own finances, which was why I thought about this topic and to perhaps share some insights with y’all as well as myself.
Close your eyes, meditate on this topic and ask yourself the question. Breathe in and out, make sure your mind and heart is calm. Then, open your eyes to see which pile talks to you the most/draws you in the most. Once you’ve found your pile, scroll down to the respective parts to see what are the messages for you.
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Pile 1    -     Pile 2
Pile 3    -     Pile 4
Disclaimer: This is solely for my entertainment purposes. Take only whatever that you feel like it. If it doesn’t resonate, it’s okay to just drop it. That aside, I do not consent to my work or images used here to be used by third parties on this platform or other websites.
Decks used: Luna Cat Tarot Deck (Major Arcana), Linestrider Tarot Deck, Sweet Dreams Oracle Deck, Starcodes Astro Oracle Deck, self made lyrics deck.
Pile 1
Overall theme of querent: The Hierophant rx
You’re someone who’s always thinking out of the box, trying new things and new ideas, despite the complaints and noises from others. You believe in your street smarts and they’ve helped you. What didn’t help you also helped you in a way, where you slowly become more grounded and think of the various outcomes instead of believing in one. Your spirit is full of energy and you work with it, reaching your highest good.
1. What is your definition of financial stability? Justice
You believe that financial stability is something critical and balance can be maintained. It’s like… There’s a balance of in and out, something stable. And they’re spent on things that are necessary. You do keep some aside for occasional leisure and luxury, but as long as your needs are fulfilled, you’ll be pretty satisfied with it.
2. What do you wish to achieve with financial stability? Five of Swords rx
You wish to stop feeling so defeated in life. You probably have been feeling defeated in terms of finance, maybe spending too much or things around you hadn’t been easy and you can’t save up for any necessary needs. So yeah, you wish to be freed from this feeling of despair, want to be freed from any fears of getting into trouble without the necessary finance capability. You also want to achieve that sense of peace you never had with financial stability.
3. When will I achieve financial stability? Strength
When you’ve regained your strength and have utilised them properly. I think you also should recognize your strengths, your plus point, what you’re good at, and to use them to your benefit. If you’re an artist, make sure you price your work accordingly; if you’re a translator, make sure your company pays you according to your skills. Something like this, recognize your strength and use them to your max. Have side jobs if you can. Work with your dreams, whatever you’ve dreamed of, and reach your highest good.
4. How should I achieve financial stability? Judgement, Ten of Pentacles rx, The Star rx
Be able to discern what is needed and what can be worked on. Do not let other people (especially your family) guilt trip you into giving them money. I’m seeing this guilt tripping a lot. Most of you probably have been giving your family too much to the point you have negative for yourself. This shouldn’t be the case. You should start nurturing yourself by rejecting any and every negativity in your life. Sure, family is difficult to say no to, it’s difficult to confront your family, but at least, set a clear boundary. What I’m speaking right now is gonna be difficult to digest, yet you know that you really need to take action. 
If there is anything that requires clarification (especially certain bills that you’re paying), clarify with the persons in charge. Who knows, you might be scammed. You also have The Star here as well, so there’s hope that things will be better. Dreams will not end, so don’t give up, work and walk towards them. All the best of luck in walking towards a new you, someone who’s financially stable in the future.
Overall energy: The Magician, The Sun, Five of Cups
You’re actually someone who’s hella capable of achieving your dreams, you’re also a good manifestor. You just need someone to bring some sunshine into your life, and you can generate good things with that solar power you’re receiving. Pardon my words as I’m running high on caffeine and low on sleep, but I hope you understand what I’m saying.
Yet now, you’re in a state of depression, of sadness, unable to escape the current phase you’re at. It’s stressing you out, it’s bringing you a lot of tears. You’re called to love yourself, to place yourself above everything. If things are difficult, try communicating with your loved ones. You may receive different insights.
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Pile 2
Overall theme of querent: The Sun
There’s a new found hope in you that I’m seeing, where you’re reconnecting with your inner child through fun and play. You still give me a mature vibe, but you’re learning to appreciate your inner child’s curiosity and letting them run free in the meadows, by the stream and all. I’m seeing a lot of nature themed here as well, since there’s the meadows and all. Connecting to the earth?
1. What is your definition of financial stability? The World rx
You probably think financial stability is something that’s close to impossible to achieve. There’s so, so much to learn about finances, and paired with what inflation is like? It’s almost impossible to get the financial stability you craved for. However, you do try to learn about how and what financial stability is like, and how you can achieve it. There’s some air energy here where you are thinking a lot about how to utilise your finances.
2. What do you wish to achieve with financial stability? Nine of Wands
To be able to go through sudden tough times without much of a concern, that you have a fixed asset. I’m seeing that you have some worries about the future, wanting to save up for any possible emergencies. Yeah, that. You have been through some rough times and now, you’re probably working on ways to have a certain amount of savings to help you through sudden hard times. 
Know that sometimes, you can’t really rush things. Try to stay calm and take baby steps. Especially since finance is money related and money is earth related and earth themes are usually slow and steady. I hope I’m making sense here.
3. When will I achieve financial stability? Eight of Cups
I am feeling that there’s some sort of fear and self limiting thoughts here that you’ll need to walk away from. Also some sort of disappointment. See, there may be times that you’ve been disappointed. Maybe manifestation didn’t really work out well for you, or maybe you thought you’d get a certain amount of money but you got less than that. And since then, you’ve been having fears that you need a lot of money only you can be assured, but it only feeds more negativity into your brain. This is when you’re called to let go of those thoughts.
That aside, I’m also seeing a possibility of a community that will be helpful in assisting you achieving financial stability. Maybe by providing assistance or some community will be willing to pay for your services.
4. How should I achieve financial stability? Temperance rx, Five of Pentacles rx, King of Wands rx
You’ll need to regain the balance you’ve lost. The inner balance, the financial balance, etc. Every sort of balance, even to get back a balanced diet. Cuz once everything is in balance, a steady amount of riches can only come to you. 
This pile gives me the feeling of abundance. And some themes of partners. Y’all prolly have some 8H placements, maybe Venus or Jupiter in it or prominent Venus and/or Jupiter. You also give me the energy that you’d like to use your past experience to help out people who are going through a similar experience.
Overall energy: The Lovers, The Fool
There’s some form of romantic love that I’m picking up on, which I also mentioned in the previous paragraphs. The road to financial stability will be a long journey, so you’re called to let go of whatever burdens you’re holding, be kind to yourself and share the beauty of your journey with whomever you meet. It’s time to stop wallowing and questioning. Just plan and act. You’re acting on your passions and dreams on achieving what you want to achieve. Go for it, go get it.
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Pile 3
Overall theme of querent: The Hierophant
I’m seeing you’re someone who’s somewhat traditional? Like… Following what has been taught in your household without thinking twice or even finding reasons to justify. I’m seeing themes of families here, but not in a very… positive view. It’s like the same toxic cycle that’s repeating itself again and again. You know you’re in that cycle but you can’t break out of it.
1. What is your definition of financial stability? The Magician
You believe financial stability is something… Where money keeps coming in (infinity sign). The Magician is a card of manifestation and you believe that money can come in by just manifesting, but just attracting them into your life.
However, you may have failed to see the other side of The Magician. This card is a card of alchemy. To gain something, another thing of equal value must first be lost. This is one part you’ve never seen, hoping for the cash to come in without doing any work.
2. What do you wish to achieve with financial stability? The Devil
I’m seeing addictive behaviours here. Some form of overspending as well. Like… With financial stability, you’d want to be able to lavish yourself with physical and material wealth. Not only for yourself, but also buying unnecessary things for your friends as well. Just… be able to spend money recklessly.
Of course, coming with this will be some discomfort and you may not be emotionally available when your friends come to you for help. There’s just… A lot of unsettling energy here in this. Remember, financial abundance is not financial stability. 
3. When will I achieve financial stability? Two of Pentacles rx
There’s some form of disorganisation I’m seeing here, lack of time management as well. You may think you’re working and doing your best to earn that cash, but you don’t notice you’re also losing some other forms of riches (love, connection, health) from overworking. It’s a sign that there’s too much movement, and you need to return to the roots, return to balance. Once you’ve done that, financial stability will come to you. You’ll see that you’ll welcome it easily and comfortably, instead of burning yourself out of whatever that’s remaining of you.
4. How should I achieve financial stability? The Hanged Man rx, Ten of Swords, The Fool rx, Five of Pentacles, Temperance
Stop delaying your rest, redefine what you wanted to achieve and come up with a realistic plan for it. Make sure your plans are sustainable and achievable. You may need to go through a significant ending that may be painful, may it be realising that your mindset is amiss, that there may be betrayals of any sort, and you’re called to acknowledge them and let them go. 
Stop being reckless with how you spend your money. There's some form of irresponsibility here that you are called to tackle. Remember to not be the Fool without any savings for emergencies. 
Also, remember that balance and moderation is necessary, spend on what’s needed, earn for what’s needed. Living honestly will make you stronger. You already know that you won’t be losing to anyone when it comes to feelings and determination, so get up again after you’ve fallen. Good luck and let’s go meet the new you in the future.
Overall energy: Wheel of Fortune
There’s a theme of divine timing and also actions that are needed to take from your side. Nothing will come to you if you don’t work hard for it, and now you need to align your view (spin the wheel) and head towards the direction you want to go. Remember to surround yourself with those who can support your new found vision and share your new found values. Structure is very much needed here and some of you may be Saturn dominant, or have prominent MC (maybe your MC makes some sort of aspect to your Sun or Saturn). You’ve wanted to be free, so reach out your hand to freedom.
Note: The energy here is very muddled, dark. It doesn’t feel as bright and hopeful as the other piles. The cards are messed, and they keep falling, like things are falling apart. I had difficulty breathing, as though there’s a weight on me, like… the energy is heavy.
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Pile 4
Overall theme of querent: The World
You’re prolly someone who’s been working on yourself. A lot. I see that you’ve been through the various phases of life and you’re now assembling the pieces, assembling the lessons you’ve learnt. I’m seeing more tough and difficult lessons, but you’ve fought through them with grit and maybe, by pure spite. Still, you made it out. I’m so happy and proud of you for reaching where you are today.
1. What is your definition of financial stability? The Chariot
Financial stability is something that’s continuous. It’s like… Steady. Having a steady and continuous income so that your basic necessities are covered. I’m seeing it reaching at least the Love and Belonging stage of Maslow’s hierarchy of needs (read up on it if you haven’t known about it). 
2. What do you wish to achieve with financial stability? Three of Wands
Freedom. This card talks about overseas opportunities and I’m seeing it as having the financial freedom to go wherever you want. Sometimes, we’ve been so focused on dealing with the necessities to the point we’re unable to enjoy the things we’ve always wanted to. In your case, travelling may be one of it, may it be travelling for a break, or travelling to see a friend. 
You may also want that financial freedom to help those who are in need. You may probably have been helped by others and now, you want to return the favour. Or go on a trip with your friends. I’m seeing a lot of friend themed messages here tbh.
3. When will I achieve financial stability? Two of Swords rx
You’re currently in a stalemate, having difficult decisions to make. There’s a need for you to investigate and compare the choices you have, to discern and make sure that you’re not being manipulated into making certain finance related decisions. In the end, decisions will still need to be made, no matter how difficult it is. 
Also, I’m also seeing a possibility that you’ll find a solution if you’re encountering troubles. It’s like the bandage covering your eyes is falling kinda feel. But be aware that there may be hidden difficulties that you can’t foresee. Make sure to keep any documents with you to avoid any possible dispute during then.
4. How should I achieve financial stability? Ace of Cups, Queen of Pentacles rx, The Hermit rx
I’m seeing artistic flow here. Maybe you can use your artistic skills to assist you as your side job? Open yourself to inspiration and watch creativity flow through you, allowing yourself to be free and create art as freely as water. It can also be healing if you’re doing it as a form of meditation. 
You need to change the distribution of energy, finance and time you have for other people in your life. It feels like a personal alignment change, where you need to discern who to have in your life and who’s feeding off you. Surround yourself with people you trust, a community you trust in.
Create your own peace, prosperity and joy in your life. This sounds hard but it can be done slowly by retreating and meditation. I feel that you’ve been so… Anxious and overwhelmed by what’s happening in the external world that you’ve forgotten to tune into yourself, to allow your heart to breathe a bit. Your abundance lies in how peaceful you are with yourself. I hope I’m making sense here. It’s like peace is one of your greatest assets, and it’s something you need the most, especially when times are difficult.
Overall energy: The Star, Two of Cups
Two of Cups, a card I associate with romantic love and trust. Basically the total combination of the cards here just talks about how you’ve been attracting love and hope that prolly comes with the financial stability. And there’s Taurus here, to cultivate and to work on whatever passion and love. Also maybe cuz I did this reading on Valentine’s day and there may be something going on during then. I no longer make sense I know.
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heftmanrhamm · 11 months
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Heeeeyyyyyyyyy @brezideje :) !!!! Thank you for tagging me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :D <3 <3 💖<3
hardcover or paperback // bookstore or library // bookmark or receipt // stand alone or series // nonfiction or fiction // thriller or fantasy // under 300 pages or over 300 pages or the exact number of pages needed and no more or less // children's or ya // friends to lovers or enemies to lovers // read in bed or read on the couch or anywhere // read at night or in the morning or anytime // keep pristine or markup // cracked spine or dog ear
Tagging: (this is like, if you're wanting to do it. No pressure. Apologies if you've already been tagged or something :) ) @miniaturestarlightdelight @five-potatoes-high @iiep-wop @streetjack
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talkorsomething · 6 months
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Too [insert adjective here] for guard ...................
Well, it's only half related.
We "hit a pothole", "had a slipup", whatever you want to call it — sunday. Aka: for the sake of my sanity we are not labeling it a relapse but good god does it feel as though I have invited the demons back in.
I know why, but I don't really know why. Because, I mean... I never have, to begin with. So: when I decided i was doing it sunday, i accepted it. "Let it happen", as someone would probably say to me. It's not...
I've been thinking about it for a while now. It's like anything - it comes and goes, a few times a year, and no matter what, I always ignore it.
Except, maybe there's something I'm not paying attention to? Or, ignoring, is the better word for it?
Of course it would be the one thing I have happening in my life.
November, I was burnt out for unrelated reasons. It was a lot to take in. That made sense. Now? ... why now?
There's not really any pressure on me. Yes, I have to do things, yes, it will be noticed if they're bad, but ...... it's not important. We don't spend time on it. I'm coming back next year, but it might be at the cost of ... all of this. I think it's progress. I haven't touched my guitar in any serious capacity in over a year. I think it's progress.
I don't take compliments well. I can't tell if that's why I don't get them, but I'm not being corrected much either. Only when I drift too far from what the work is supposed to be, only after weeks of it going, I can only assume, unnoticed. I keep getting stuck.
...push it back down.
Telling me I'm doing good isn't telling me what I know I have to be getting wrong. I could take it, at the cost of... all of this. I'm anticipating, and I know it can come. This is not where I was when I started.
It's been said, I haven't been told, that not starting it means you're more of a burden, by making the other person have to do it first. I know that. I do. And still it doesn't help. I'm not drowning. It wasn't an accident, but it wasn't planned, either. I don't know you.
I don't know you.
I'm not a good person. I'm not a nice person. Every week I tell myself this is really it, and every week I come back, and ... what? Forget I ever said anything? Forget we're not friends?
Well, we're not, huh? Nobody is, with me. What you see I swear you misunderstand. You don't ask. If you do, well, I can't answer. We're at an impasse.
It's not even my fault we didn't make it. I shouldn't feel like this over nothing. I don't do anything. You will, correctly, not let me do anything, because potential doesn't matter if you can't back it up. If you won't back it up. I let things happen to me.
I don't even feel better. And, actually, ironically, i think i know what would let me feel better. If I can't be upset with anyone else, at least I can be with myself.
... but, well, not even that. Your heart in my hands, but I mean it diegetically. And metaphorically. I hate putting myself out there, I hate having to actually perform, and yet every time, no matter what, I do it. I'm fine. I only cared at the start, and even then not very.
I don't feel anything. Not a lot, anyways. I don't let it happen. I can't. I don't know what it'll mean if I start being honest with myself.
...
I've pulled myself out of this before. A few times, now. Different circumstances, but I've done it all the same. Seasonal depression notwithstanding.
I'm only here because I did things I was scared to. And still, I'm the same. No progress made. The only way out is to do it again but I feel like I can't. I can't.
Will someone just let me say that?
Will someone just fucking help for once?
#sh tw#(implied - i know i didnt actually say it in the post but yes i did c** myself sunday)#100% секретный дневник левы НЕ ЧИТАЙ#im cursed with being a bit too self aware so#i think its compounded by my nepotism hire ... not letting me do my nepotism hire things#(for legal reasons i cannot say)#and then to add to that not letting me do anything I probably COULD actually do given slightly more instruction (at guard)#its just ... im a very angry person actually . except right now thats because im not EATING RIGHT EITHER#BECAUSE ALL OF MY PROBLEMS ARE COMBINING INTO ONE BIG INTERCONNECTED PROBLEM#back to my point.#guard instructors decided that for my first year i will not do anything cool because i'm not able to learn in about 2 seconds flat#[read: get very upset very quickly when i get things wrong and then . cant do them because im trying not to have a breakdown over]#[something REALLY STUPID like NOT BEING ABLE TO DO A SIMPLE TURN WHILE MOVING WITH THE FLAG]#so like okay. i get it okay. i'm not good at this. could you at least TELL ME i suck so i can feel justified about feeling bad about it.#could you just fucking tell me this isn't a guard where you can show up with no experience. could you do me a real solid and tell me that.#i dont know maybe the real sign it wasnt for me was when i was seriously considering not turning up for the second 'audition'#really i just hate how much he yells at us. not even at ME because i do so little there is no room to fuck it up. just at everyone else .#it doesn't motivate me to come back but i NEED 'friends' so bad and i love performing so now i just get anxious enough that i cant eat ..#.. before going to rehearsal. which is stupid. because i've done it a million times before.#......#i'm just.... everyone says he isn't actually that bad. & he used to be worse. so it really is just me.#it's just me being oversensitive. because i've never had any REAL experience in ... just about anything#so; yes. it IS on me how I feel and obviously how I react. and I keep pushing it down because it's stupid; really; to still feel this way.#anyways. our last weekend without a competition is this very weekend#so you'll never guess who's having a REALLY FUCKING HARD TIME trying to practice#i'm like this close to going to bed early and without having done the dance warmup for the third day in a row.#лёва there is no TIME why are you STILL NOT PRACTICING for the love of god get it together#(oh also when i say 'friends' in quotes it is because i desparately want to believe we're friends but they dont even talk to me really)#(and because im not even IN most of the show theres not much to bond over. literally like i have everything down Decent enough (apparently)#so theres not even any 'i will help u with this toss' team bonding. no shared moment of we are all out of breath because i DONT DO ANYTHING
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lollixp0p · 8 months
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The Video (18+)
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Pairing: Best friend!Hwang Hyunjin x afab!reader
Genre: Smut (MDNI), bit of feelings
Word count: just under 3k!
Warnings: Idol!au, subby!Hyunjin, slightly perv!reader, recording, (maybe a bit dub con because he doesn't mean to send it but reader watches it anyway), mommy kink, masturbation (both but separately), Hyunjin fantasizes about reader, reader fantasizes about Hyunjin, lmk if I missed anything!!
Summary: Hyunjin finally gets some alone time after weeks of hard work and decides to use his time to... relax. The next day he ends up sending you something on accident that sets off a big change in your lives, with or without either of you really realising.
Note: My first ever fic!! :3 Inspired by a video I saw on phub. (@cbini (Ems isn't on Tumblr rn she still wanted to be tagged so I hope it's ok), @comet-falls, @hyunsvngs, @mnwrld and @skz-hell lmao hello everyone, writing blog reveal!!😁 here's this fic I've mention to all of you as an anon<3 (depending on who you are I'm either ❄️anon, 🐾anon or sounding anon😳)). To anyone reading this please give me literally any feedback (comment, reblog, anything!), I want to know if this is good or not since it's my first fic🙏😣
Please do not under any circumstance copy, translate, or repost my works!
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It's been exactly three weeks since Hyunjin's had any time for just himself, though it feels like months at this point.
Recently everyone's been running around like headless chickens and between vocal trainings, dance practices and the studio, there hasn't been much time to just relax and recharge. Preparing for a new album really is the busiest time of an idols life.
There hasn't even been time to see family or friends, which is common during busy spells like this, but always dissapointing to think about. Now even more so, with how much he's been wishing to spend time with you, one of his closest friends... who also happens to be his crush. Not that he'd ever let you know though, not in a very long time.
It feels almost like a blessing, getting back to the dorms from practice late in the evening and realising... he's got the place all for himself, at least until his roommates get back from the studio.
Changbin had messaged him earlier, telling him that they'd probably be there well past midnight, so there was no use waiting up for them. To him though, this was the very opposite of an issue. With that much free time, he'd definitely be able to... make himself comfortable, so to speak.
See, not having time to relax also means he'd basically had no time to get off. The best he'd been able to do had been quick little sessions barely once a week in the shower right before passing out on his bed from the exhaustion of working hard.
The realisation that he'd be able to do anything he wants during his time alone is enough to get his dick twitching in his jeans and he decides the shower can wait until later.
Hyunjin goes to his room and locks the door after himself even though he's alone, it's just become a habit after so many years living with his members. He sets his bag down next to his bed and thinks through his plan.
Hyunjin has a little secret, which is that he loves recording himself do dirty things that range from more vanilla to much less vanilla. Something about the thrill of being recorded even if no one will ever see it just... makes him so fucking horny.
He opens the camera of his phone, puts it to video mode and presses record. Moving his hand off the lense and setting it down where he normally sets it, on the carefully placed pile of books on his desk, he sits down on his bed.
"Hmm... I hope the angle's good... It's been so long since I've had time for this", Hyunjin sighs with a pout and brushes his hair out of his eyes. He knows the camera won't see it though because he's made sure the stand, his pile of books, is at a level that cuts off his head perfectly.
Hyunjins hands run down his body slowly and he exhales deeply, just loud enough to get picked up by his phone. Once they reach his jeans he unbuttons them, unzips the zipper, then pulls the jeans down just enough to expose his underwear. Hyunjin pulls his shirt up over his stomach to be held in place under his chin, rubs his hand over his bulge and hums.
It's been so long since the last time he's been able to take his time making himself feel good. It's almost embarrassing how quickly he's getting hard.
He takes his dick out his boxers and then spits on the palm of his right hand. It's dirty and wet but it just turns him on even more. He grabs his dick with the hand and slowly moves his fist up and down, to spread the saliva and precum all over his dick to make the slide easier and wetter but to also get himself to full hardness.
"A-ah, ohh... that's so good... Feels-fuck, feels so good", Hyunjin sighs. It really won't take him too long to cum, he just knows it. He's been pent up for far too long.
He tries to think of something to help his issue and immediately thinks of you, no matter how embarrassed or dirty it makes him feel.
When you first started showing up in the dirtiest corners of his mind he felt so ashamed. Now it doesn't matter to him anymore. You'll never find out so why feel bad?
He continues to move his hand on his dick while thinking of you. The last time the two of you had time to hang out together you'd worn the lowest cut shirt he'd ever seen on you. He had tried so hard to act normal around you but whenever you bent down he'd been able to see into your shirt.
"Haah, fuck..." , he squeezes himself a little harder at the memory. Everytime you moved he could see your bra poking out from the top, black and lacy. The entire time he'd been doing his best to not bust in his pants. Oh, what he'd give to be able to see your tits. They always looked so soft and they'd probably fit perfectly into his palms.
Whenever the both of you would hang out at yours, watching movies and just hanging out, you never bothered to wear a bra. Why would you? It is your house where you want to be as comfortable as possible.
The feeling of laying down on your couch watching a movie with you on top of him, in just a t-shirt, will end up driving him mad one day. Everytime he'd felt your nipples poking into him he'd almost moaned out loud.
"Hngh... Oh my god, please... m-mommy!", he lets out pathetically, moving his fist faster. God he just wants you to use him, to do anything you want to him. The thought makes him whine desperately.
One of the most common fantasies for him is you on top of him using him to get off, not caring about if he's close or not. You'd sit on his face and ride it until you cum. He could probably cum untouched like that. All he'd need was tasting you and seeing you cum, just for him.
All the sudden he remembers the phone recording him and he shudders. He imagines what your reaction would be to seeing him like this. Would you be disgusted or delighted? Would you tell him what to do and how to touch himself? Maybe you'd touch him... He hopes you would.
"Mommy... please touch me, aah- oh!", he runs his thumb over the head of his cock just right and his thighs twitch but he keeps them open, in perfect view to the camera.
Throwing his head back he imagines you riding him. You'd be so tight and wet around him. Maybe you'd tie his hands behind his back so he wouldn't be able to touch you... he'd really like that. You'd feel godly around him, Hyunjin thinks.
"Fuck, oh fuck! Mommy I'm-haah, I'm so close, please!", his dick twitches desperately. You're so gorgeous, to him you're the sexiest person he's ever seen. He feels himself getting so close that tears spring to his eyes.
"Ah- 'm gonna... mommy, gonna cum...!", he whines out long and loud. It takes Hyunjin two more strokes to let go and he cums the hardest he's cum in weeks. He doesn't even register whispering your name. Hyunjin leans back on his left hand and keeps stroking himself through it.
The feeling is overwhelming, so much so that his thighs start twitching pathetically and the tears in the corners of his eyes fall. He's getting incredibly overstimulated but he keeps going, wanting to keep enjoying the feeling, just a bit more.
He squeezes himself one last time and suddenly everything on him feels gross and dirty. He's just had the best orgasm in weeks so it's no surprise that he came a lot, everywhere. He even managed to get some on his chin.
"Fuuck... Did you-haah... did you enjoy that?", he chuckles to the phone. It takes a while for him to come down from the high, the twitchiness and the feeling of euphoria lingering in his body. Once he's capable of standing up again he stops the video.
With his body feeling like jelly, he takes off all his clothes, drops them into his hamper and prepares to shower, at last.
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Hyunjin wakes up to his alarm the next day feeling more refreshed than he's felt in weeks. He shuts off the still ringing alarm and quickly gets up from his bed to get dressed and go eat breakfast.
Checking the calendar on his phone to make sure he knows his schedule for today, he makes a note of one thing; he'd have a lot of time alone at the dorms today too, since he's only got a dance practice and a recording session today, which obviously means 3racha will stay behind to stress about their songs while Hyunjin can return early. Maybe this time he should continue the latest piece of art he's been working on after he gets back?
Hyunjin gets through the day well enough.
After eating breakfast he messages you a "Good morning pretty <3 please remember to drink water!" like every morning when he has time for it. He gets to the practice room only five minutes late, which is a record this early in the morning, because usually he ends up sleeping in at least ten minutes (which makes Chan scold him for being such a heavy sleeper).
He does well at practice, even though he ends up a little exhausted. That's nothing new though, with how hard they always work to be the best they can be.
The rest of the members leave to take a break but Hyunjin decides to stay behind to film the solo choreography he's been working on for fun. Once he's happy with how it's turned out, it's time for him to go record his lines.
The recording session goes smoothly, without hundreds of retakes and everyone's satisfied with the result. Afterwards they decide to order some take-out, as a reward for a job well done... and also because they're all feeling too lazy to even think about going to the dorms to cook.
While eating Hyunjin finally realises to check his phone again. "Good morning, take care of yourself too!! :)" is your response to what he sent earlier. It's nothing more than a kind response but it makes him grin to himself like the fool in love he is.
"Yaaah!! Hyunjinnieee, what's making you smile so beautifully?", Changbin leans towards him with his signature flirting-with-Hyunjin grin, mouth half full of rice.
"It's nothing," Hyunjin responds back to him cheeks red, "and don't talk with your mouth full hyung... Do you not have any respect?"
Changbin decides to drop it in favor of eating more delicious food.
"Oh come on... we wanna know!!", Han pouts at him from his seat on the couch in the room. Hyunjin shoves another mouthful of food in his mouth to avoid the embarrassement of explaining how a single text messaged from you manages to make his heart beat out of his chest.
Once Hyunjin's done eating he's free to go back to the dorms and just like he suspected the rest of his dormmates stay behind to work some more, although they all whine at him to stay to explain the previous mystery. He declines and they all keep their sad puppydog eyes on him until he's out the door.
He keeps texting you during his ride, all the way to the dorms. Once he's in his room Hyunjin decides to just change into some clean clothes. He's too excited to talk to you and get to painting, he can wash up later.
He lays in his bed to keep texting you and at some point your conversation changes from how your day's been going to talking about dancing and he mentions how he just today filmed a new choreography bit he's made for fun.
❣️:
Can I see what you've been working on? :)
I'm sure it's really good, you always are!!
Jinnie:
Well... since you asked so nicely😉
[video sent]
Quickly sending the video Hyunjin exits out the messaging app, feeling so giddy he can't help but squirm around on his bed. He still can't believe someone like you could be interested in seeing him dance.
It might seem like a small thing for most but he feels himself turning red just thinking about the way you look at him while he talks about something so important to him. It makes the butterflies in his stomach every time you're near go crazy. It's so attentive, like you actually care and are interested in his interests... and maybe even...?
'No' , he thinks to himself. There's probably no way you could ever actually be interested in him, not in the same way he's interested in you at least.
He leaves his phone charging and finally gets out of bed to go to the kitchen for a cup of coffee. He'd need it if he wanted to stay up late to work on his newest art piece.
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Hearing the familiar 'ping' notification of receiving a message makes you open your phone again and just like you thought, Hyunjin had sent you the video of his latest masterpiece of a choreography. Not waiting a second you press the video just to see.... Hyunjin take his hand off the camera and set the phone down on the desk in his room he draws on. He sits down on the edge of his bed and says something, you aren't really sure what, because the volume's too low. In confusion you turn it up more.
Hyunjin sighs and reaches up to move his hair out his face, probably. You can't see it though, because the camera cuts his face perfectly off frame. Suddenly his hands run down his body to the button on his jeans. He opens it and starts undoing the zipper next. You just look at the video in shock. 'He isn't about to... to take them off is he?', you think to yourself, just as he pulls the jeans down enough to expose his white boxers and then palms his bulge.
Should you stop watching? Keep watching? How long has it even been playing? How long does it keep playing? While you wonder this you almost miss Hyunjin pull his hard dick out of his underwear and spit on his palm and... Oh God...
You've now done something you can never take back. The downright sinful view of his cock is something you don't think you're ever going to be able to forget. How do you even face him after this? After watching him grasp his dick in his hand and pump it a couple of times to spread the spit and precum around.
You exit the video, panting and absolutely soaking through your underwear. Your other hand rushes to your face to feel your cheeks. They're burning and feel like you've been standing out in the sun for hours, when in reality all you've done is accidentally watch your best friend play with himself.
You struggle to decide what to do with the video and in the end save the video without much thinking, then delete the message of it and decide to notify him of his mistake. As long as he doesn't know you saved it, it should be fine, right?
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It takes Hyunjin less than 10 minutes to make and get the coffee. He returns to his room humming the tune of a song he's had on repeat recently. Setting the coffee down on the desk and taking his phone off from the charger he notices new messages from you.
❣️:
Uhm...😕
Hyunjin, I don't think you meant to send that.
He looks at his screen confused. What did you mean by that? He...
Oh God.
Did he send the wrong video?
Frantically opening the video he sent earlier he sees himself, in video, move his hand off the phone camera and set it down the desk near his bed and sit down. Oh no...
"Hmm... I hope the angle's good... It's been so long since I've had time for this", video Hyunjin sighs and reaches up to move his hair from his eyes. His head may be out of frame but he clearly remembers pouting while saying this. He watches himself slowly unbutton and unzip his pants, adjusting them so that his boxers are clearly visible in frame. In the video his hand drifts towards his crotch slowly, teasingly.
He quickly exits the video and promptly shoves his head under his pillow and yells. He'd accidentally sent the wrong video while hurrying to get a cup of coffee. How could he have messed up this bad? In his panic, it takes him a moment to respond.
Jinnie:
Oh god
I'm so sorry!!
Please don't watch that!
❣️:
Don't worry!!!
I stopped watching the moment you started unzipping your pants😖
I saw nothing, promise!🙏 It's been deleted already!! 
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Little does he know though, you'd kept the video. You're not really sure why, but subconciously your brain keeps screaming' to finish it later, of course'.
...
Fuck it, you don't think you can wait until later.
Taking a deep breath, you open your gallery to find the video he sent you. You hesitate for a second but press play anyway. You can feel how you're already soaking through your underwear but pay no mind to it yet.
You watch him do the things you've seen already, all the way until he spits in his hand... and you pause the video. 'Is it right to watch this? I mean, he didn't mean to even send it...', you think to yourself.
But the thought of seeing him touch himself, to hear him make the sweetest noises you could ever in your wildest dreams imagine him making drives you on.
Pressing play again you dip your fingers into your pants. You rub yourself over your underwear and oh my god... you can't believe the wetness you feel after less than a minute of watching the video. You focus on the phone you're holding in your other hand and finally move your fingers into your underwear to directly touch your pussy.
On your screen you see Hyunjin start to stroke himself faster, the head of his dick a dark pink, you can feel his desperation through the screen. Without thinking you move your fingers to your clit and start rubbing it in circles, aided by the wetness of your leaking pussy.
He moans out loud and even though you can't hear it through the fog in your head, you know he's desperate. You move your fingers down to your hole and dip two of them in. You're so wet you barely need to even stretch yourself out and then he does it.
"Hngh... Oh my god, please... m-mommy!"
You push your fingers deeper and your pussy lets out he lewdest squelch which in turn makes you close your eyes desperately in pleasure. 'Mommy? When he masturbates he calls out for mommy??', the thought makes you lose your mind. You think about what it would be like if he called you mommy in the throes of pleasure.
You want to make him follow every command you give him. The way he'd look up at you on his knees with you standing above him. Maybe you could make him suck on a strap? He'd look so ridiculously delicious with his mouth full, drool dripping down his cheeks.
You add another finger and start rubbing at your clit with your thumb at the same time. The feeling makes you whimper and imagine his hands on you, teaching him how to touch you perfectly. You're getting so close and you remember to focus your screen again.
Hyunjin looks absolutely disheveled. His dick is red and throbbing, you can tell he's getting close. His voice is another thing that gives him away. He's whiny and his voice keeps cracking every time he opens his mouth. Hyunjin bucks into his hand and moans.
"... mommy, gonna cum...!", he strokes himself twice more and then finally cums. You're so close it's maddening. All the sudden you hear him... whisper your name?
It makes you go off the edge and your entire body clenches and seizes while you silently cry out from all the pleasure you're feeling. Your walls suck in your fingers with how you're clenching around them. On the screen Hyunjin twitches violently, working himself through the end of his orgasm.
You pull your fingers out of yourself and slump down on your bed exhausted, but the last 20 seconds of the video that's now over haunts you. Did you hear him right?
You gather strength to pick up your phone again and rewind the video to the part where he cums and turn the volume almost all the way up. Admittedly you end up fixating on the way his dick looks and face twists in pleasure when he cums and then he says, or more like whisper your name. Your brain blanks.
"Fuuck... Did you-haah... did you enjoy that?", he chuckles to the phone, sits in place for a bit to properly come down and then gets up to stop the video.
You're wet, confused and you can feel your heart beat out of your chest. What do you do now? How can you ever face him normally after that... Does he feel the same way you do? Is he sure he didn't mean to send it?
It's all too much to think about, so you decide that instead of thinking about it you'll clean yourself up and... crawl into a hole where no one will ever find you. Probably. The only thing you know for sure is you definitely won't be sleeping tonight.
© lollixp0p 2024 | please do not under any circumstance copy, translate, or repost my works
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chosok-amo · 1 month
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THE ONE WITH THE PRANKS : GOJO SATORU, GETO SUGURU
living with you is all fun and games. . . until you start pulling all of these harmless pranks on them.
w/c : 4,1k
warning : fluff
[☆] MASTERLIST
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CRACK MY NECK, BABE?
you were sprawled on your bed, scrolling through your phone and idly passing the time. as you flipped through various videos, you stumbled upon one where a girl pulled an elaborate prank on her boyfriend by pretending he had accidentally broken her neck. the sheer shock on his face made you burst into laughter.
a mischievous idea sparked in your mind: what if you pranked suguru geto? his usual softness, gentleness, and delicate demeanor would make for a perfect reaction. the thought of him panicking over a broken neck scenario seemed both hilarious and irresistible.
feeling a rush of excitement, you decided to act on your idea. you got up from your bed and headed to the kitchen. you found some raw pasta and stuffed it into your cheeks, trying not to laugh at how ridiculous you must look. the hard pasta pieces poked uncomfortably, but the anticipation made it worth it.
with a mischievous grin on your face, you made your way to the living room. there you found geto and gojo in their usual spots— geto was engrossed in a book, while gojo was lazily watching tv. you could hardly contain your laughter as you approached them, knowing that your prank was about to unfold.
“love, can you crack my neck?” you ask him.
geto paused for a moment, looking up from the book he was reading. he studied your face for a second, noticing your slightly puffed cheeks. a mixture of confusion and concern crossed his usually calm expression. “crack your neck?” he repeated, his voice tinged with uncertainty. meanwhile, gojo, ever observant even in his lazy state, looked over at you, his eyebrow raised in curiosity.
geto closed his book, resting it in his lap as he gave you his full attention. his eyes searched yours, trying to decipher the situation. “are you sure about this?” he asked, his tone gentle yet cautionary. meanwhile, gojo's lazy interest quickly turned into intrigue. he sat up slightly on the couch, no longer paying attention to the tv show he had been watching.
you nod, “yes, my love.”
you walk over to him and sit on his lap with your back facing him. “i've been feeling pain in my neck these past few weeks,” you pretend to complain with fake pain in your voice. geto's expression softened as you settled onto his lap, facing away from him. he gently placed his hands on your hips, steadying you. “why didn't you tell me earlier?” he asked, his concern growing at your complaint. his hands move to the base of your neck, tenderly massaging the area.
“it was nothing, i just wanted you to crack my neck,” you told him, still persistent on him cracking your neck. geto's brows furrowed a bit at your insistence, but his touch remained gentle and hesitant. as his fingers continued their careful massage, he spoke in a low, slightly worried tone, “are you sure this is the best way to deal with it? i don't want to hurt you, my love.”
you hummed softly, “yes, i'm pretty sure, baby.”
despite his initial hesitation, geto sighed softly and relented. he knew you could be stubborn when you wanted something. “alright, but please tell me if it hurts, okay? i'll be careful,” he reminded you, his voice tender but firm. gojo, now fully engrossed in the unfolding scene, leaned forward on the couch, his eyes fixed on you both.
you only nodded, don't really have faith in yourself if you open your mouth. geto takes a deep breath, bracing himself for what he's about to do. with one hand still resting on your hip, he carefully encircles your neck with the other hand. “ready?” he asks, his voice laced with both concern and determination. you only give your boyfriend a gentle nod as an answer.
with your confirmation, geto's grip around your neck tightens slightly. using a well-practiced motion, he applies a controlled, yet precise pressure to your neck, attempting to crack it. meanwhile, gojo, who had been silently watching, leans even more forward, his eyes wide in anticipation.
there's a sudden, loud cracking sound as it responds to the manipulation— but instead of it from your neck, it is actually from the raw pasta you just bite inside your cheeks. your body falls on the floor with hard tud and geto gasps in horror.
gojo is stunned into silence as the loud crack rings through the room. his eyes widen even further, his mouth hanging open in shock. geto, however, is horrified. he jumps up from the couch, his eyes fixed on you lying motionless on the floor. he drops to his knees beside you, his hands trembling as he gently turns you over.
“no, no, no, no,” geto mutters under his breath, his voice filled with disbelief and panic. he frantically checks your breathing, his hands shaking as he brushes your hair away from your face.
“fuck, i'm sorry baby, fuck—”
meanwhile, gojo has leaped off the couch and rushed over to you, dripping with sheer panic. geto's touch is urgent and desperate as he searches for any sign of life. his eyes never leave your face, his own breath coming in short, ragged gasps. gojo kneels down beside geto, his usual confident demeanor nowhere to be seen. his fingers reach out to touch your wrist, searching for a pulse, any pulse.
geto and gojo's panic turns to confusion and disbelief as your laughter rings through the room. they exchange glances, their worry slowly shifting to a blend of relief and irritation. gojo speaks first, his voice a mix of relief and annoyance, “you scared us half to death!” meanwhile, geto's initial relief morphs into a mix of bewilderment and anger. he stands up, pulling you up with him, and scowls at you.
“what the hell was that all about?” he asks, his voice a mix of anger and relief. his hands grip your shoulders firmly, a mixture of frustration and bewilderment etched on his face. gojo stands up as well, his initial relief transforming into a blend of confusion, irritation, and a hint of amusement.
“i can't believe you pulled a prank like that. you could've given us a heart attack!” he exclaims, his voice a mix of relief and a hint of admiration for your audacity. with a pout kissing your lips, you look at geto who's much taller than you with a puppy's eyes, “i'm sorry, i didn't mean to..” you murmur a soft apology.
geto's stern expression softens slightly as he sees your pout. however, his irritation hasn't fully faded. he let himself fall on the couch with a sigh.
“you scared me half to death, baby,” he repeats, his voice a mix of relief and lingering anger, “i thought you were hurt—or worse.” gojo, standing beside geto, lets out another chuckle, finding some humor in the situation, “yeah, that was kind of a dick move on your part,” he says, his tone now more serious— more likely pretend to be serious.
geto shoots a sharp glare at gojo, silently telling him to shut up. he then turns his attention back to you, his eyes still holding a hint of disappointment. “i don't think it was funny at all. what possessed you to do something like that?” he asks, his tone a mix of bewilderment and lingering concern.
gojo moved to sit beside geto as you stood in front of them, pulling the now-broken pasta from your mouth. with a mischievous glint in your eye, you looked at geto and gojo, mumbling, “i saw this on tiktok and thought it was funny.” their jaws dropped in disbelief, clearly stunned by the lengths you went to for this prank.
geto gently pulled you onto his lap, and you settled there, letting your leg rest on gojo’s lap. you wrapped your arms around geto’s neck and said, “come on, baby, you know it was all in good fun.”
geto lets out a sigh, his irritation gradually melting away as you snuggle onto his lap and wrap your arms around his neck. he can't stay mad at you for too long— especially not with your legs now across gojo's lap. “it was ridiculous, that's what it was,” he mutters, his tone a mix of stubbornness and affection.
meanwhile, gojo leans back into the couch, a smirk on his face as he rest his arm on your legs. “yeah, it was pretty entertaining,” he admits, his eyes flicking between you and geto. geto swats at him again, “don't encourage her. we almost had a heart attack, for crying out loud.”
gojo dodges geto’s swat with his lightning reflexes, chuckling all the while. “oh come on, you gotta admit, it was a pretty impressive prank, though. she had us going.” meanwhile, you continue to cling to geto, shamelessly playing the cute card to win him over. “yeah man,” you grin happily and raise your hand to give gojo a high five, knowing fully that he always has your back for something like this. “oh great, now you're high-five him,” he looks at you in disbelief before turning to gojo, “encourage her more, why don't you?”
gojo high-fives your raised hand, a large smirk plastered on his face. “what can i say? i respect the dedication.” he turns his smirk towards Geto, clearly enjoying teasing him. “and come on, it was a helluva prank. you have to give her credit for that.” geto rolls his eyes at gojo's response. He knows better than to argue when gojo is siding with you. “oh, yeah, a 'helluva prank',” he mocks, a hint of sarcasm in his voice. he turns to look at you, his expression softening a fraction. “next time, maybe pick something less heart-stopping, okay?”
geto's resistance seems to soften under your affectionate display. despite his annoyance, he can't stay mad at you when you're clinging to him so adorably. he lets out another sigh, this one more resigned than stern. “you're lucky you're cute,” he mutters, his tone now laced more with fond resignation than lingering irritation.
HIDING SOMEONE IN THERE?
you heard the front door close and the familiar voices of gojo and geto echoing through the hallway. when you realized they were close enough to see you, you quickly shut the door behind you and pretended to hide someone in the room. you made sure to act like you were trying to keep a secret, adding a playful air to your hiding game as you waited for their reaction.
“h-hy, babe, how's work?” you ask, standing in front of the door and pretending to be nervous.
gojo was the first one to notice your demeanor. he couldn't help but raise his eyebrow at your unusually jumpy behavior and your nervous tone. he studied you carefully, narrowing his eyes as he tried to discern what was going on.
“it was fine,” he replies, his voice laced with curiosity. “but something seems off with you. is there something you're hiding from us? who's in there?” he questions. you shook your head, “n-no, i'm not hiding anything, nobody in there,” you tell them, holding tightly to the door handle.
geto chuckled at your attempt to be innocent. he leaned against the wall, his arms crossed as he observed the way you were guarding the door so vehemently.
“oh really?” he says with a knowing smirk. “why are you being so secretive then?”
gojo took a step closer to you, his eyes scanning your face for any hint of a lie. he could tell you were hiding something, and he was determined to find out what it was. “come on, babe,” gojo said, his voice gentle but firm. "tell us what's going on."
he reached for your hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. he could feel the tension in your grip, and he knew you were feeling nervous about something.
geto leaned forward, his expression now slightly serious. he knew how stubborn you could be when you were trying to keep a secret, and he was growing more curious by the second. gojo stepped even closer to you, towering over you as he looked down into your eyes. “open the door,” he commanded, his voice leaving no room for argument.
“it was nothing,” you persist, gently pushing gojo. with your curse, you make a sound inside the room, trying to make it more believable that you actually hiding someone inside.
gojo's eyes widened as he heard the sound coming from behind the door. he knew you were trying to distract him, but that only made him more suspicious. he quickly grabbed your shoulders, gently but firmly pinning you against the wall.
geto's smirk faded, replaced by a more concerned expression. he looked between you and the door, his mind racing with possibilities. he was getting impatient, “stop trying to hide from us. just tell us what's really behind that door.” you rolled your eyes— purposely knowing how much they hate when you do so and shook your shoulders to get hojo’s hands off you. “it’s nothing,” you said with a dismissive tone. “nobody’s in there. just go on.” you gave them a gentle push, urging them to move along.
gojo's grip on you didn’t loosen. in fact, it tightened a bit more as he leaned in closer, his eyes fixed on yours. “we know you're lying, babe,” he said, his voice laced with a hint of frustration. “there's clearly someone behind that door, and we deserve to know who it is.” geto moved to stand next to gojo, his arms crossed over his chest as he studied you intently. he was starting to get annoyed by your stubbornness.
you look up to them, take a step back as you glue your back to the door. you shrug your shoulders, “i told you nobody's in there,” you casually said, acting nonchalantly.
gojo's expression darkened, his patience starting to wear thin. he took a step closer, his body towering over you once again.
“cut the act,” he said, his voice taking on a more authoritative tone. “you're only making yourself look more suspicious. just tell us who's behind that door already.” geto's gaze flicked between you and the door, his curiosity growing even more. he took a step closer, blocking any escape route. when you just stare at them without saying anything, gojo rolls his eyes and looks at geto. the black-haired man nodded his head and held you while he opened the door.
as the door swung open, the room was surprisingly...well, empty.
gojo's eyebrows shot up in surprise.
“what the hell...” he mutters.
geto, still holding onto you firmly from behind, also seemed surprised by the lack of anything in the room. “did you really make us think you were hiding something, just to play with us?” he asks, the irritation evident in his voice. you laugh a little, “i told you it was nothing.”
gojo's annoyance started to turn into a mix of irritation and amusement. he shook his head, his lips slightly tugged into a smirk. “you're insufferable, you know that?” he says, his voice now laced with a hint of affection.
geto released his grip on you and let out a sigh, but his eyes were now filled with curiosity. “so, you really weren't hiding anything?” he asks, genuinely baffled. you push gojo inside the room and close the door before looking at geto. “oh, i'm in there, hehe, it's me!” gojo voice could be heard from inside the room. geto just laughs as you wrap your arms around his waist and pull him away to leave gojo alone.
“ah! who are you?” gojo screamed to nothing from the inside before he opened the door and saw you leave with geto. geto chuckled as he glanced at gojo's confused expression. he wrapped an arm around your shoulders and led you away from the room, giving a nonchalant wave to gojo.
“see you later, love,” he called out, his voice filled with a hint of mischief.
meanwhile, gojo stood there dumbfounded, processing what had just happened. he couldn't believe you had tricked him into thinking you were hiding a person in there all this time. as you and geto walked down the hallway, geto couldn't help but laugh heartily, impressed by your sneaky ploy.
“i can't believe you made us think you had someone in there just to pull one over gojo,” he said, still chuckling. “you're something else, you know that?” you just giggle when he kisses your cheek. gojo caught up with you and geto, a mixture of amusement and disbelief on his face.
“i swear, you're going to drive me crazy one of these days with your pranks,” he said, shaking his head. “but i guess i should've known better than to fall for your schemes.” you glanced behind you and saw gojo already removing his blindfold. “so much for those six eyes,” you remarked, “and all for nothing.”
gojo chuckled and rolled his eyes. “yeah yeah, rub it in why don't you,” he replied, a hint of playfulness in his voice. “i guess even with six eyes, i can still be tricked by my own girlfriend,” he added, his eyes landing on you. geto couldn't help but laugh again at the whole situation.
GIRLS' NIGHT
you are giggling to yourself as you put on a dress that shows too much skin for your comfort and for your two boyfriends' liking. it was already past midnight, and the three of you were ready to go to bed, but you decided to prank your boyfriend before going to sleep.
you can hear their voice talking in your shared bed. so with your make-up on and dress hugging your body, you walk out of the bedroom. as you walked out of the bedroom, gojo and geto suddenly went silent. their conversation stopped abruptly as their eyes locked on you, both gazes traveling up and down your body, taking in the sight of your exposed skin.
gojos breath hitched, his eyes widening slightly. he swallowed hard, trying to keep his composure as his eyes lingered just for a moment too long on your curves. geto's gaze darkened, his eyes scanning every inch of you. his jaw tensed as he tried to hold back his urges.
“where are you going? it's past midnight,” gojo asks, his possessiveness echoes through the room. his silver eyebrows knit together.
“i'm going out with a friend,” you tell them while standing in front of the mirror, giving them your back. both gojo and geto's expressions darkened at your reply. gojo's jaw clenched and geto's eyes narrowed. their possessiveness flared as you stated that you were going out with a friend.
“at this hour?” gojo's voice was laced with a hint of irritation. “who exactly are you going out with?” his eyes flicked over your skimpy outfit, his mind already filled with thoughts of other men seeing you like this. “i’m going out with the girls,” you said, trying to hide your smile. “babe, could you send me some money?” you turned around to face your boyfriends, who were now sitting on the bed.
gojo and geto exchanged glances, their expressions still guarded and possessive. “the girls, huh?” geto repeated, his voice betraying skepticism, “which girls?” gojo's eyes flicked to the clock on the wall before looking back at you. he nodded slightly. “i'll send you the money, but where are you going exactly?” he asks, trying to hide the unease in his voice. “shoko, utahime, and i are going to check out this new club that just opened,” you explained, giving them a ‘duh’ expression as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.
gojo and geto's expressions softened slightly, but their suspicion still lingered in their eyes. they knew you weren't telling them the full truth, “that new club in shibuya?” gojo's eyes narrowed slightly. “the one that's all the rave right now?”
geto folded his arms, his jaw clenched. “that place is filled with all kinds of people,” he said, his voice wary. “are you sure its safe for you to be going there?” gojo couldn't help but feel uneasy about the thought of you being surrounded by a bunch of drunk men in a crowded and dimly lit club. he knew how protective and possessive he was, and the thought of other men looking at you sent a pang of jealousy through his chest.
geto, too, shared the same concern. his mind was filled with thoughts of some random guy trying to hit on you or touching you in ways only he and gojo were allowed to do. he clenched his fists, trying to rein in his anger.
“come here first,” gojo called you, waving his hands for you to walk closer. the moment you were close enough for him to hold, he wrapped his arm around you and gently threw you effortlessly onto the bed as you let out a small gasp and geto fast enough to cover your body with a blanket and sandwiches you in the middle, enveloping you in their warmth. “you're not going anywhere,” he hugged you tightly as your laughter mingling with surprise.
gojo's arms encircled your waist tightly, pulling you closer until your body was pressed against his chest. he buried his face in the crook of your neck, a possessive growl escaping his lips.
geto leaned in, adding an extra layer of protection by covering you with his own body. he wrapped an arm around you, his fingers gently tracing small circles on your skin. the room was filled with a mix of laughter and the sound of your heartbeat. gojo's hold on you was almost crushing, as he wrapped his long limbs around you, pinning you down on the bed.
geto's body was pressed against your back, his steady breaths fanning your hair. his fingers continued to lightly trace your skin, his touch gentle but possessive. “you're not going anywhere,” gojo's voice soft as he looks at you, “you're stuck here with us tonight.”
“why can't i go?” you laugh, still trying to wiggle your way out.
gojo's arms tightened around you, his grip almost bruising. “because we said so,” he replies, his voice stern, “those clubs are filled with drunk idiots and creeps. we're not letting you out of our sight.” geto nods in agreement, his chin resting on your shoulder. “besides, we think you look better with less clothing anyway,” he mutters into your ear, his voice low and filled with desire. “pervert, you just want to keep me for yourself,” you hit his arm lightly.
gojo chuckles against your neck, his hot breath sending shivers down your spine. “guilty as charged,” he murmurs, his lips barely tracing the sensitive skin of your shoulder. geto chuckles as well, his hand sneaking under your dress to caress your thigh. “can you blame us?” he asks, his voice dripping with lust. “look at how perfect you are. why would we ever want to share you with anyone else?”
let's just say nobody slept that night.
HEIMLICH
you and your two boyfriends are in the kitchen, preparing dinner together. you were standing by the counter eating some chips and just talking with your boyfriends. as you munched on your chips, gojo and geto were busy working on dinner, trying to outdo each other with their cooking skills.
gojo was cutting vegetables with a determined expression, his knife moving deftly and precisely.
geto was standing by the stove, stirring a pot of sauce with a spatula. every now and then, he would taste the sauce and make slight adjustments to the seasonings. the kitchen was filled with the clanking of pots and pans, the sound of sizzling oil, and the occasional banter from your boyfriends.
gojo and geto immediately turn their attention towards you as you start choking. they both rush over to your side, their eyes filled with concern.
“babe, are you okay?” gojo asks, frantically patting your back to help you breathe. geto grabs a glass of water from the counter and hands it to you, his own panic evident in his voice. “just breathe, take it easy,” he says, gently rubbing your back. you pointing at your throat, still coughing silently telling them that there is something stuck in your throat.
you pointing at your throat, still coughing while silently telling them that there is something stuck in your throat.
gojo and geto's eyes widen in realization as they see you gesturing to your throat, still coughing. “something's stuck?” gojo asks, his voice laced with worry. geto quickly moves behind you, positioning himself to perform the heimlich maneuver if necessary. “just try to breathe and stay calm,” he says, his hands ready to help.
he makes a fist with one hand and grabs it with the other. place his hands just above your belly button and below the ribcage. the moment he is ready to pull inward and upward on the diaphragm to force air out of the lungs to expel the blockage and feel your rear touching his crotch, you moan sensually.
geto quickly pull himself away and his face turns red as he realizes what just happened. gojo, on the other hand, can't help but burst into laughter. “did you just...?” geto mutters, his eyes still wide from surprise. gojo is practically howling with laughter now.
geto's face turns even redder, his mind clearly playing out a different scenario than what had just happened. you continue to burst out in laughter, enjoying his stunned expressions.
gojo can barely contain his laughter as he watches geto's flustered expression, still clutching his stomach from laughing so hard. “i can't believe you actually moaned,” he sputters between fits of laughter. geto tries to regain his composure, still blushing deeply as he looks at you. “you did that on purpose,” he mutters, his voice a mixture of embarrassment and frustration.
you continue to laugh uncontrollably, finding the whole situation hilarious. gojo finally catches his breath and wipes away tears of laughter. “oh my god, that was priceless,” gojo says, still shaking with laughter. geto, still quite red and flustered, crosses his arms and pouts playfully. “you're never going to let me live this down, are you?” he asks, his voice laced with humor. you shake your head as you hold geto arm for support while you still laughing.
geto rolls his eyes, but he can't help but smile at your endearing behavior. he playfully pulls you closer to him, his arms wrapping around your waist. “you're enjoying this too much, brat,” he mutters, his voice filled with affection.
gojo grins widely, clearly still amused by the situation. “that was the best heimlich maneuver i've ever seen,” he says, chuckling. geto just groans, burying his face in his hands as he tries to hide his embarrassment. “i cannot believe you just did that,” he mutters, his voice muffled.
“i think you broke him,” he teases, nodding towards geto, who is still trying to hide his face. geto groans even louder, still mortified by the whole situation.
“i'm never performing the heimlich on you again,” he mutters, his voice filled with mock annoyance.
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coffeeshopguest · 5 months
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please i need stardew valley bachelors in a kinky gangbang with gender neutral or female farmer!
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I loved this suggestion but please have mercy, I didn't know which ones you wanted so I did all 6 which was VERY difficult for me to incorporate so I made it sort of cheap in the end to save having to write a whole night of sex with them all 😭 pls enjoy! I'm sorry if it's a little shitty, I've never written or read group sex stuff 😭
The Bachelor's and the Farmer's Night
Word Count: 1569
Pairing: F!Reader x Sebastian, Harvey, Sam, Alex, Shane & Elliott
Warning: 18+, group sex, rope kink, handcuffs, swearing, unprotected sex, vaginal fingering, anal mention, oral mention, cum swallowing, light bdsm (choking, spanking), all of it is pretty vague and quickly mentioned except the fingering & vaginal sex
It was Sam's idea. Not that he was gonna openly parade that around to anyone at first. It started as a pathetic fantasy that he would get off on at night, thin walls making him cover his own mouth as he imagined the farmer laying on a bed, tied down, taking it from him and Sebastian over and over. He was ashamed to even incorporate his friend in a fantasy, but the idea of a threesome with the farmer and Sebastian was just...so fucking hot. The idea of watching her get fucked, then fucking her - Sam was a simple man and he nearly came on the spot every single time he imagined it. 
What's worse? He began incorporating the idea of Alex in the mix. He was friendly with Alex - and Sam had seen the farmer interacting with Alex a lot recently. Even throwing around a football with him the other day. Sam didn't immediately think anything of it, until he woke up sweating and hard, having dreamt the farmer and Alex going at it while Sam jacked off and waited for his turn patiently. Slowly, Sam began to think about...what if more people got involved? And oh, god. He finally let it slip to Sebastian. 
"What do you think of that new farmer?" Sam asked as he took a shot for one of the striped balls on the pool table. His voice was even, but his heart was racing a pathetic amount. 
Sebastian leaned on his stick, watching Sam's shot. "She's cute," Sebastian answered. The two made slow eye contact and Sam debated just leaving the whole conversation at that. But something about the way Sebastian stared him down made him crack. 
"Yeah, yeah, she is...uh- you like her?" 
Sebastian took a swig of his drink, nodded a little. "Sure," he said, "why?" 
"How...how do you like her?" Sam gently rested his stick down on the wall, watching his friend. "Like," he began, "sexually...or...?" 
Eyes widening a little, Sebastian tilted his head. "I- we don't usually talk about that kinda stuff," he dismissed, turning his attention to the pool table and ignoring Sam for a moment. 
Sam nodded slightly, before he finally whispered, "I know but I want to...uh..." he glanced around the Saloon to see if anyone was looking towards them. No one was. "I kinda want to...have...some group sex with them." 
Sebastian took a shot, perhaps out of shock, the cue ball launched across the table and sunk a striped ball. He stared down at the table. Quiet. "Just us three or?" 
"Uhm...I was thinking maybe Alex..." 
Sebastian raised his head up, hair falling over his left eye. "The farmer? Did you talk to her?"
 Sam shook his head and Sebastian slowly turned to the table where he'd set his drink aside, grabbing it and gently taking a sip. "Ask her. Tell me when you do."
"You...you're in?" 
Sebastian gave a short nod, and the two acted as though the conversation never even happened. 
▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱
When presented with the idea, albeit from a terrified Sam, you agreed immediately. With a condition. You wanted Sam to invite Elliott, Shane, and Harvey. His eyes widened. 
"Six....you want six guys-" you nodded. Sam had to awkwardly adjust his pants, at the mere suggestion of that many guys fucking you he got hard. Just the idea of watching it was too much for him. "I- I'll see what they say." 
▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱
To Sam's shock, every single person agreed. He was expecting a sharp no from Shane, but he said yes without a second thought. Harvey stuttered out a "Oh...holy shit...uh- at the farm-?" and blushed madly. Elliott tried to maintain some sort of dignity but by the immediate bulge in his pants Sam guessed his answer before Elliott could recover words and agree. Alex tried to act disgusted at first. But then he mumbled a "can I bring handcuffs and rope?" (Sam asked "dude you live with your grandparents in a small town, why do you even have those?" and was met with a glare). 
So it was arranged, a day and time was set. The six made their way down to the farm, chatting quietly amongst themselves. Sam was hard basically half the day before this, eagerly awaiting the nighttime - when his fantasy would become reality. The farmer answered the door, smiling softly at the six men. "Boys, come on in," she smiled. Sam nearly choked, they were wearing a flannel, opened up, only a bra underneath. Fuck. Fucking christ. She was good at this. 
▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱▰▱
Upon being brought to the bedroom, Sam gently guided you to lay down, Harvey quickly mumbled "she needs a safe word-" and the rest agreed. Turning their attention to you. Six flushed, eager faces. You felt like prey laying in the bed, flannel opened to expose your bra. A safe word definitely was needed. As much as you wanted to take all six repeatedly you weren't entirely sure how much you could take before you were too used.
"Red light," you murmured out. "Yellow light means give me a break, but I want to keep going." 
And so it began. Sam quickly ripped off the flannel and tossed it aside, then tore the bra off and threw it aside, his hands wandered to your jeans, slowly unzipping them. Your panties exposed, he gently moved his hand down, rubbing softly against the wet spot. You bit your lip, about to moan. Quickly, Sam backed up, Sebastian took one side of the bed and Alex the other. Hands launched to your chest, as Sam gently finished pulling off your pants. A hand on each breast, gently running your ripples through their fingers, you began moaning out loud. Sam got off the bed. 
"Who wants to go first?" he asked, Elliott stepped forward. He gently undid his pants, erection springing out. He gently lined up. 
You bit your lip, before he backed away, "did...anyone bring lube?" Elliott's voice gently asked. It was Harvey who had, gently digging it out of his jacket pocket and handing it over. Elliott gently poured some into his hand, gliding it across your pussy causing you to moan out. Out of the corner of your eye you saw Sam, eagerly jacking off as he watched. Sebastian was still by your side, but his hands had left your body. Elliott gently shoved a finger in. "I'll start slow, you're about to have a hell of a night," he said reassuringly. 
You looked up into his eyes, nodding softly. He smiled, gently leaning down, placing a kiss on your forehead, before be pulled his finger out. "Did that hurt at all?" you shook your head, and he gently shoved two fingers in, letting your body adjust to the feeling, he slowly began pumping them in and out of you. All eyes were on you and you whimpered softly, meeting eyes with Shane who was still fully dressed. 
"Sha- shane-" you mumbled, gasping as Elliott's fingers expertly worked you. "Can- you- strip?" 
A hand gently laced around your neck, "use manners, baby, what do we say?" it was Sebastian's hand, tight grip but just light enough not to hurt. Elliott's fingers effortlessly kept time. 
"Please?" you whimpered, the hand left your neck and Shane slowly began to undo his belt. As soon as he was stripped, Elliott's hands left you, for only a second you had a miserable feeling of emptiness before Shane swapped with Elliott. 
He postioned himself, hands gently gripping your hips as he found where to line up. "Ready?" you nodded, and with one swift thrust he was in you. Lips found your neck, Shane was focused on fucking you. It was Harvey who had knelt beside you, hand gently gliding down your body to your tit's. Lips on your neck, sucking and leaving a hickey. 
Shane grunted, speeding up more. "Fuck- tight...gonna-" 
"Not in her," Sam whimpered, you had forgotten Sam was still here, in the corner of the events jacking off. "We can't all...not in her." 
To describe the events would be tiring and long and endless. They took turns, spilling themselves over your naked body, in your ass, in your mouth. Alex was partial to rough sex, Sam into watching, Harvey wanted to pleasure you however you asked, Shane was focused solely on his own quick finish, Sebastian wanted to tie you down with Alex's ropes when he fucked you and choke you out, Elliott was gentle and soft and sweet and placed kisses on your forehead as you took their dicks over and over and over. 
In the end, the sun rose when you guys finally ended the session. You had given several sessions of head. Taken fingers, fists, and dicks. Been tied down, choked, spanked, had your hair pulled. And each of them had asked for something the others hadn't. Sam begged to finish by jacking off onto your naked body. Sebastian wanted your lips wrapped around his cock when he finished. Alex, he was the one who dug out a condom so he could feel your pussy tighten around him as he came inside you. 
When the session ended, you simply told all of them. "We're doing this again." 
2K notes · View notes
prettyboykatsuki · 9 days
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call it quits or call it destiny | h. umemiya.
✮ tags ; afab + fem!reader(she/her pronouns, referred to as a girl, gets dressed up by tsubaki and kotoha), reader gets their hair braided (no desc of texture) and puts on makeup, lore heavy reader backstory + personality, deliquent!reader, gap moe, best friends to lovers, idiots to lovers, themes of insecurity, mutual pining,the use of she/her for tsubaki, jealousy, confessions, loss of virginity, creampies / unprotected sex, oral (f!recieving), fingering, 18+
✮ wc ; 13.9k (dont. don't say anything)
✮ a/n ; me when i completely lose my mind because i have a weekend off. whats wrong with me.
anyways. there's no major triggers for this but be forewarned reader is meant to be very rag-tag deliquent type. she has a strong personality and generally is not feminine. she is like a mangy street cat a bit. also if u want u should listen to easily by bruno major while reading.
✮ synopsis ; you've been quietly pining for umemiya for a little over ten years with no plans of confessing.
you did not have a plan for what you would do if umemiya confessed to you first.
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Once a day, everyday - Umemiya will come into your store, pause, smile, and confess his love to you before going off on his own.  
And once a day, everyday, you reject this confession with a soft huff  telling him to quit being stupid before shooing him away.  
It's become a ritual. A fixture in your daily routine that you're not allowed to ignore despite how hard you're trying.  
He's been doing it for three months, more or less. 
His reason for confessing everyday? Because he’s waiting on the day you confess back, of course. Which you've refused to do for the last few months and will continue to refuse for as long as you’ve got.  
It's not because you don't like him, alright? 
You've known Umemiya since middle school and you've liked him for about the same time. One of the core memories of your childhood is the day you met him, crying while sitting on a  swing-set, after what felt like the worst day of your life. 
( On the day you run away from home, you seriously consider not going back.  
You don’t really know how long you sit there. People walk by but most of them move on quickly. It’s mid-day before anyone bothers to stop and ask you something.  
 "I've never seen you around  before.” A strange looking boy approaches, friendly and unassuming but not entirely cheerful “Did you just move here?"  
You keep quiet, closing your eyes and hoping your lack of response is enough to push him away. Your hope fizzles out when you hear the swing creak as he sits besides you. 
"I'm Umemiya Hajime. I live close by." His voice is airy and causal. "I'm sorry you're having a bad day.”  
"Fuck off," You reply bluntly, frowning. “I don’t need sympathy. Leave me the hell alone.”  
He pauses before pushing himself slightly forward to barely swing.  
“I couldn’t leave you alone while you’re sad,” He voices willfully. "It might make you feel better to talk about it." 
In disbelief at his response, you finally look up and asses him properly. It doesn’t do much to change your initial unfavorable impression. White hair, blue eyes and a little taller than you. You’re definitely about the same age. All of that to say, there’s something weird about him that you can’t quite place.  
Despite his manner and way of speaking though, you don’t actually think he’s that weak which makes his whole aura even more unnerving to you. His attempt at being non-threatening doesn’t work for him. He’s being a real try-hard about trying to make you comfortable… 
Either way, he’s got an air about him that puts you on the defensive.  
 Talking to someone about it had never been much of any option, and somehow it pisses you off that he’s being so brazen about it.  
Maybe if you tell him about, he’ll stop prying into your business. Or maybe you’re just looking for excuses to let off steam. 
You don't care anymore. You wipe your nose with the back of your sleeve.  
"I don't live here and I didn’t move. I ran away." You reply.  
He keeps looking at you, curious, inquisitive and sympathetic.  
"Why?"   
"I broke a girls nose." You scowl. The words rise up in your throat like bile. Make you feel cornered. The wounds too fresh. "It—she bullied me for years for one. And I never fought back, it was all petty bullshit anyway and I didn't like getting calls home. I didn't care about that but she—it wasn't for nothing. She was causing trouble for Sensei."  
Umemiya keeps to himself, humming in response to your troubles. Your voice breaks on your next sentence, chest tightening.  
"It doesn't matter what she does to me but—" Your hands ball up at your first. Your throat feels thick, eyes suddenly watering as your chest throbs . "Anyway, I couldn’t let it go like normal."  
He hums. "So you hit her?" 
You shake your head, sniffling. "Not at first. Just told her to shut up. Said that she didn't know what she was talking about. She hit me first..." You screw your eyes shut, sighing. "...said she was gonna spread rumors about him just trying to get under my skin and be malicious,” You lean back slightly and look up towards the gray sky. “I punched her after that."  
You realize he's looking at your bloodied knuckles, but he isn't making an expression that you can read easily. You don’t remember the last time you spoke to someone like this who wasn’t Tsukimori-sensei.  
"Are you crying because you got in trouble?"  
“Who cares about that?” You sigh “Sensei had to put his job on the line and take responsibility for me,” Your brow furrows in frustration. “He’s the one person I don’t want to cause trouble for,” You grip the iron chains of the swing set with a closed fist and finally admit what you’ve been avoiding to say out loud. “I don’t want him to hate me…”  
The kid besides you smiles  absently at your words. Half-way between listening and recalling something else, it seems like. You can’t help but wonder what the hell his deal is. You barely know him but you’re spilling your guts. 
He speaks after a long while. "I don't think he sees it that way. I think you should try to talk to him about it."  
You make a face, rejecting the idea. "What? No way." 
Umemiya shrugs, smiling - though it doesn't quite meet his eyes.  
"He sounds like he cares about you. If he knew your reasons, there's no way he would hold it against you. And it’s important to share your burdens with people who care for you." You look over and see him smiling somberly at the mulch beneath his shoes before returning back to what you’ve grown to know as his usual self. "Anyways, I think we should be friends. Tell me your name."  
You sniffle again. What a weird guy. Well you say that but 
You still give him your name. 
"What a pretty name," 
When you tell him to shut up again, your new friend Umemiya just laughs.  
And you find you feel just a little bit lighter.)  
That night, Umemiya walked with you to take the last train and told you to come see him again  with good news. 
You aren't sure what compelled you to follow his advice. Maybe because he was the first person who sat down and listened to you about it other than Sensei himself. 
Tsukimori-sensei was your school counselor and the only adult in your entire life that seemed to worry about. You didn't have any friends in middle school and you were a scary looking delinquent girl without a mother and a mostly absent father.  
But Sensei was always incredible gentle to you and incredibly kind. And despite what rumors that girl tried to spread  - he was never anything more than an important mentor.  
It was fucking embarrassing crying in front of him but because you were honest - you got to keep in touch with him. He attended your middle school and high school graduation - supporting you as you started to sort your life out. Became the closest thing you ever really got to a parental figure.  
Over time, you got close with Umemiya and developed strong loyalty to him. You attended an all-girls middle and high school the next town over - totaling one other friend in all six years of your remaining education. Lack of socialization meant that Umemiya somewhat became the very center of your existence. 
It was easy to visit him thanks to parental neglect. You sort of melted into his life. Tsubaki once called you his guard dog as a half-joke, but there's some truth to the sentiment. Quick to defend, quick to heel, and always happy to see him.  
You, like many people, owe Umemiya a lot. His meddling over the course of ten years gave you reason to push forward. He even encouraged you to try and attend school and not give up on living a half-decent life. 
You've got a never-ending list of short-comings but being with him didn't make you hate yourself. It made you want to be better because you knew Umemiya would accept you for whoever you decided to be.  
So despite your delinquency, you managed to graduate high school. Post-graduation, you attended a vocational culinary school and became a patisserie before moving to Furin for permanent residency. You opened a bakery and supply bread to Kotoha-chans diner.  
You made something of your life mostly 'cause of Umemiya. He's not your only friend anymore but he's still your best. Even though you never really pictured things like dating or romance - in some way it only makes sense that it'd be that meddling, kind-hearted idiot that you end up falling for it.  
Lovesickness aside, you respect Umemiya more than anyone in your personal life.  
He’s stuck around with someone like you this long after all. That means a lot to you.  
Somehow the two of you mesh well despite being totally opposite.  
You decided as soon as you realized it sometime in high school that you'd keep your feelings a secret for the rest of your life. You had a strong resolve in your beliefs about the whole thing which made it easy. You hid 'em so well even Sakura's stupid accurate romance detector didn't uncover them.  
When you picture Umemiya's future - it was easy to picture the kind of woman he would end up with. Another kind-hearted idiot like him, a social butterfly. Someone a little softer.  
In any case it definitely was not you. You didn't need it to be. You've received so much from him already, you never entertained the idea. Plus, Umemiya has dated other people over the years, so in your head there was never any hope to cling onto.  
For all reasons listed above, a requited romance is at the very bottom of your expectations.  
That's why you've been in this fucking conundrum.  
To say it was a complete shock to you when Umemiya openly confessed to you many months ago would be understatement of the goddamn century.  
He confessed right on the last day of Spring, totally out of the blue. 
(It’s a little unusual for Umemiya to call you at this hour. If it were anyone else, you’d be a little upset since you’ve gotta be up around four-am to get prepared for the day.  
It’s him though so you’re particularly tolerant, yawning as you find Umemiya on a familiar swing-set, still wearing your PJ’s.  
"Why am I out here in the middle of the night with you?"  
Your words lack any real malice as you sit down. Umemiya remains totally quiet. It's unusual for him to not immediately go on a tangent upon seeing you.  
"Oi. Earth to Hajime." You frown at him. "Did ya get beat up before coming here and scramble your brain? Give me the popsicle before it melts."  
He looks over at you and chuckles as he hands you the bag from the convenience store. You ignore his odd behavior and open up said popsicle before it melts  - carefully splitting it down the middle and giving him the bigger side before going to town on your own. He takes it from you but doesn't even bring it up to his mouth.  
Weird.  
"Did something... happen? Like seriously happen?" You take a long lick of your iced treat. It's melon flavored, your favorite. "Seeing you frown doesn't feel right. Gives me the heebie-jeebies."  
He cracks a little smile at that. It makes you feel better. He shakes his head.  
"Mm, nothing happened. I just have something I want to tell you."  
You nod in understanding. "'kay. Take your time."  
He blinks, surprised.  
"Hm? Aren't you gonna scold me for wasting your time?"  
"Nah. Whatever it is must be serious if it's making you all introspective or whatever. 's fine. Bring me coffee tomorrow and I'll forgive ya."  
His lip twitches up. "I l really like that about you."  
You feel yourself flush and wave a hand at him. "Ahh, shut up."  
He pauses for a second then shakes his head. "Mm. It's more like I like everything about you, actually."  
You twist your face in confusion. "What are you on about now?"  
"That's what I came here to tell you." Umemiya says after a deep breath. He says it so casually you wonder if you're mishearing him - leaning back to look up at the stars. "I really, really like you. I just felt like I had to tell you that"  
You stare at him in disbelief.  
"Wha—huh?"  
He doesn't even flinch as he repeats it.  
"I like you."  
"No the hell you don't."  
He furrows his brow with a light laugh. "I just told you that I do, silly."  
"But that's—" You don't say the word impossible. You really want too, but you know exactly how he would react if you did. You simply shake your head. "No, you don't." 
"I thought you might respond like this so don't worry but how about you?" He shrugs then looks at you intently. "I thought you might like me too."  
Your eyes go wide. Oh fuck.  
You feel like a deer caught in headlights. You know you should be happy about this, deep down. That'd be the normal response.  
But you just feel complicated as shit instead. Fuck does he mean? Umemiya.... likes you? There's just no way that's true. Not after all of this time. And how the fuck does he know you like him back when you've been keeping it in? 
You can't bring yourself to look him in the face and lie. Your heart rises to your throat as you shakily stand to your feet.  
"Stop...thinking whatever you've been thinking. I'm going home." You reply in complete panic. 
 The minute you say it, you turn on your heel so you don't have to look at his face. You don’t even want to know.  
And before Umemiya can catch you and try to talk it out, you bolt. 
What the fuck was that?)  
For the last few months, you've been avoiding the topic of conversation as much as you humanly can.  
The possibility of Umemiya even just accepting your feelings was already far beyond your imagination, but him returning them? Confessing first? That wasn't even in your realm of possibility.  
Ever since then, you've been losing your mind trying to force your life and train of thought to go back to normal. You’ve done all of the math on it.  
Realistically, you can't ignore him. Your lives are so mixed together it'd be impossible unless you went under protection and changed your name which you briefly considered. You thought of turning him down but you’re pretty sure you wouldn’t be able to actually do it despite how good you are at keeping it in. Either way, your best option logistically is feigning ignorance and trying to keep the whole thing out of your mind entirely which should've been easy.  
Tricking yourself into believing the whole thing was a dream? Lightwork.  
Except. Except.  
Umemiya just won't give up.  
He confesses to you again every single day. Worse, he doesn't care whose around to hear him. No one in your friend group seems even the tiniest bit shocked by it which doesn't help the situation. You can't get used to it, can't get used to him being so fucking cheeky as he stops you midway through normal conversation to tell you he loves you.  
He's persistent to a fault and while you've done well feigning immunity - you can't survive like this.  
You've graduated to tell him to go away and treating the whole thing like some big joke.  
But honestly? 
You're avoiding having a proper conversation about it. Umemiya is especially keen in not letting you forget that. And determined to make you confess.  
But you're not going to to let him sway you.  
You've got principles, after all.  
__  
After you close up shop on Friday, you get dressed to attend a kickback with all of your friends.  
It's a barbecue technically - commemorating the end of summer. Togame is really into grilling and in their weird domestic partnership, Chouji really enjoys hosting. They've done this once or twice a year ever since they started living together.  
Once you've finished cleaning up the store, you take the train to Kotoha's place - mistakenly assuming you'd leave as soon as you got there. However you failed to realize that Tsubaki and Kotoha would be getting ready together.  
You got jumped as soon as you walked through the door - so now you're wearing a different pair of clothes that Tsuabki got for you and waiting for them to finish getting you dressed up so you can leave.  
Tsuabkino is inches from your face while Kotoha braids your hair. You feel itchy and exposed but with both of them here there's no way you're going to get out of wearing it. 
"Can we just go?" You grumble, not enjoying the feeling of being poked and prodded.  
"No," Tsubaki insists, frown making her expression pinch. "You have half an eyelash on. Sit still." 
"He'll be happy to see you dressed up," Kotoha adds, trying to encourage you. You frown and look down.  
"Whatever. I don't care about makin' him happy."  
The both of them pause and stare at you until you fold under the pressure - screwing your eyes shut and making you flush.  
“Such a blatant lie.”  
Tsubaki giggles. “Right?”  
Your face feels hot. "Ahhh, alright already. Shut up."  
"Honest girls are much cuter," Tsubaki coos. You give her a half-assed glare.  
"Don't you like Hajime? Why're you trying to set me up with him still?" You mumble. You always think they’d make a perfect pair.  
"Of course I like him. He's my prince." She smiles at you. “But it’s a little different to how a certain someone loves him. And well, if you knew the way he looked at you…"  
You frown, feeling hot all the way up to your ears as you ball your fists up and look down at your lap. "Whatever." 
"You should stop trying to worm your way out of it," Kotoha adds, much less sweetly. "You know how he is. He couldn't give up on you for ten years like some idiot."  
You blink. "Huh? But ten years would mean -"  
Kotoha braids your hair even tighter making you wince. "I know. You're both stupid like that."  
"Don't be mean, Kotoha-chan. And you, be a little more honest, okay?"  
You sigh deeply. 
"Ain't like anything is gonna happen either way. I already told you both I'm not accepting his confession," 
"Cause you're a huge wuss, yeah we know."  
You elbow Kotoha lightly.  
"Maybe nothing will," Tsubaki hums mischievously.  "But it feels nice to dress up for him, right?"  
You pretend the thought doesn't make your hear flutter.  
Tsubaki does you the kindness of laughing lightly before moving on. 
__  
You arrive to the function an hour later than planned and stick mostly with Kotoha and Tsubaki until half way through the evening.  
Loosening up with a few drinks, the three of you part ways to catch-up with different people. It's not rare you see them, but it's not often everyones schedules allow them to be in the same place.  
Lucky for you, Umemiya does you the courtesy of not confessing during the first half of the night before food comes out.  
(Though you do spit beer in his face after he calls you pretty, which he takes on the chin after cleaning up.)  
After dinner, the function simmers down significantly. People quietly break off into groups and chat to each other into the late night. About that time people split whatever desserts they brought among guests.  
You brought cookies and something specifically for Chouji and Togame as thanks for hosting.  
Towards the end of the night, you find yourself sticking sort of close to Umemiya. Though he's having his own one-on-one conversation with Hiragi while sitting next to you , turned the other way.  
You busy yourself catching up to Suo, Sakura and Nirei - all of whom you consider yourself close to.  
Of them, you're the closest to Nirei which always surprises people. 
The kids a total wimp but he helped you years ago study to graduate so you're a little closer to him than everyone else. He's a great guy though and you hang out alone sometimes too.  
The conversations gone far left at this point in the evening.  
Suo leans back against his chair and looks toward Sakura besides him with a lazy smile.  
"Sakura-chan would make a great wife." 
You snort listening to them bicker. Sakura grows beet red, throwing an empty beer can at Suo's head that he catches gracefully.  
"Go die."  
"What? You're good at domestic work and you have a cute side, Isn't that all you need?"  
"Shut up. I'll kill you."  
As Suo breaks out into laughs, Sugishita comes down from the kitchen just in time to catch the argument. He crinkles his nose up.  
"Oh, Sugishita-kun. 'Sup."  
He nods to your greeting as he leans against the wood railing of the outdoor deck.  
"What the hell are you two talking about?" 
'What? You mean about Sakura being a good wife?" Suo asks. Sugishita crinkles his nose. 
"Don't phrase it so repugnantly but yeah I guess." 
"We were talking about marriage 'cause I was complaining at work."  
"What's happening at work?" 
Nirei sighs as he lays it out again to Sugishita after having given the spiel to the three of you once.  
"One of my superiors at work is a lot older than me and keeps bringing up marriage," Nirei explains woefully. "It's all he talks about. He thinks I'm seeing someone."  
Sugishita frowns. "Eh? What gave him that impression?"  
A good question you hadn't considered asking.  
You raise your brow at Nirei who laughs awkwardly while he holds your gaze.  
"You know that picture of us from highschool? When he came to the cafe at your school festival?"  
You smile spitefully, crinkling your nose in faux distaste. "The one wear we wearing those stupid maid costumes?"  
"Yup. That's the one. It's a good picture of us so I keep it on my desk and he saw it so..."  
"You keep a picture of just the two of you on your desk? No wonder he got that impression.” Suo adds.  
You sense Umemiya suddenly tense which you find weird. He's still talking to Hiragi though when you glance from the corner of your eye. You brush it off.  
Nirei blushes, elbowing him.  
"Shut up. I've got group pictures and stuff too. But he just singled out that one cause you know,"  
You nod in understanding before it dawns on you. Your eyes widen. "Oh, shit? Does that old man think you're dating me?"  
Nirei closes his eyes and sighs. "He won't even let me correct him." 
You pause before breaking out into genuine laughter.  
"Pfft, that's terrible." You reply sympathetically, taking a sip of your beer before giving a mischievous grin. "Maybe you can make it work for you though, eh? Tell 'em we got hitched forreal and then I'll call you on the phone and nag you to get home for dinner so you can leave earlier."  
Nirei acts like he's touched making you laugh even harder. "You'd do that for me?"  
You give him another toothy grin. "I'll even help you fake some wedding photos. We'll be accomplices." You lean back with a shrug. "You gotta wear the dress though." 
Sugishita laughs at that. "You being a blushing bride is a little..."  
You snort, shooting him a dirty look "Shut up."  
"Deal. Not a bad plan honestly." Nirei says with a sigh. "Whatever gets me out of the office early."  
"Even if that means being married to me?" You joke.  
He smiles at you. "Aw, what do you mean? That's the best part."  
You chuckle at him good-natuedly and the conversation quickly moves on.  
The alcohol is starting to make you dizzy so you eventually tune out as the four of them talk, glancing at Umemiya from the corner of your eye.  
You swear you catch a glimpse of his jaw ticking.  
__  
For the rest of the night, Umemiya is off.  
No one else can tell. You know that because the atmosphere remains light until everyone leaves around two-am. There's no blips or tension, no awkward pauses. 
But you know Umemiya. He's been real weird all night and it's bugging the shit out of you.  
It's a well past two now, and you've just left the late night cab you took with him. Umemiya lives close so he's walking you home.  
He's usually energetic after a get-together like that so his dead silence is weirding you out. You're pretty good at figuring his feelings out but for once you feel totally clueless.  
It feels as if even the cicadas and crickets have gone to sleep. There's nothing bu the streetlights overhead and soft glow of the moon, coupled with the soft click of your shoes on the pavement. Occasionally, a car will pass by.  
At one point, it becomes too much. There's still a few minutes until you're home.  
You stop in the middle of the sidewalk and turn around to look at him. Umemiya pauses, startled as he stops with you, and doesn't smile which only makes your concern worsen.  
"Oi. What's up with you?"  
"Hm?"  
You cross your arms over your chest.  
"Don't 'hm' me. You've been in a bad mood few for the last few hours. It's gonna bug me all night if I don't ask, so what's up?"  
He stares at you.  
"You noticed?"  
"How could I not notice?"  
"I was hiding it pretty well, I thought." He states more than asks, half-smile on his face.  
"Yeah. But well," You shrug. "I'm always looking at you for better or for worse. So. What's wrong?"  
He stares at you a long time before sighing, running his fingers through his hair. You've never seen him like this. You've seen him pissed off before, seen him mildly irritated - but never this... pouty? It's not like he's pissed.  
He's quiet, taking a deep breath of cool night air before sliding his hands into his pockets and taking a good look at your face. 
"Do you know that I like you?"  
Your eyes widen as you blink wildly.  
This is what he wants to talk about? 
He pins you down with his stare, hands in his pockets and intense as ever.  
"Don't even think about bolting this time, okay? I'm asking you seriously. Do you?" 
Your eyes flicker down the concrete - feeling extremely uncomfortable and suddenly sweaty. You shrug, unsure of what else you could say or do.  
"Hard not to know." You mumble. "You tell me everyday." 
"But do you get it?"  
Your frown deepens.  
"Of course not. How could I possibly get something like that, stupid?"  
He takes a deep breath. "But you like me, don't you?"  
Panic sets in. If you could sink straight into the Earth you would.  
"...Never said that." 
He calls your name quietly. "Look at me, at least. Stop running away from me and just look." 
You know you're being stubborn but you can't help it. You've kept it a secret for ten years and all of a sudden he wants you to tell him you like him? You've held it in for so long already and he's telling you not to run away.What other choice is there?  
One wrong move move and everything will come crashing down inside of you. You can't even lie about it either.  
Damn it.  
"I won't look." Your voice is warbly and it makes you feel so pathetic you could die, tucking your chin petulantly "Don't wanna,"  
Umemiya frowns at you.  
"If you say you don't like me I'll let it go."  
You remain very quiet and close your eyes tighter. He sighs softly, making your chest hurt.  
After a minute, you muster up the courage to be dishonest - determined to drop it at all costs. You're slow as you pick your head up.  
"I don't like you," You repeat slowly, carefully - trying not to stumble the words. "So quit it, alright?"  
He laughs humorlessly and holds your gaze.  
"That's the first time you've ever actually lied to me. You're terrible at it," 
"I'm not lying." You snap. Umemiya smiles somberly when he sees tears on the corners of your eyes. He steps closer to you. You freeze. When his hand reaches cups your cheek, you feel your legs lose all their strength and close your eyes. You're terrified to even look at him, not wanting him to see what you know is obvious on your face.  
He wipes them as he tilts your face towards him slowly. 
"Tell me, at least. If you're going to refuse me, don't I deserve to know why? Do you hate the idea of dating me that much?"  
You shake your head. "Stupid. How would anyone hate that?"  
"So I deserve to know why you're turning me down."  
A long moment of silence draws you out of your feelings. You guess that's fair enough. Maybe this way he'll leave you alone  - as long you're clear about your reasons. He’s the earnest type after all.  
You manage to suck up all your tears and clear your throat enough to give him an explanation. 
You step back a little from him, putting some distance between you as you stare down at the sidewalk. 
"You know... I respect ya more than anyone else. You've always been someone I admire. And I uh, owe you a lot. So I only want the very best for you and all." You scratch your neck, taking a deep sigh. "For me... regardless of my feelings, I want you to be with someone who really fits, you know? Well put-together and everything. Someone that suits you better"  
He pauses before frowning.   
"Regardless of your feelings? Does that mean you were willingly pushing them aside?" He says distraught. "For how long?"  
You shrug, trying to lighten the conversation. It’s too devastating otherwise. "About ten years, give or take." 
The sheer distress in his face makes you want to keep talking, just he doesn’t look so disheartened. Like some explanation will clear things up.  
"It ain't a bad thing, Hajime. You've given me a lot and I'm serious when I say I want the best for you. I love you, if that's what you wanna hear. I'm content just being besides you as your friend." You say with a shrug. "I can be kinda selfish but there's a limit to my greed,yknow."  
He looks like he's in shock. 
"Wanting someone to love you back isn't greedy or selfish."  
You find you don't have anything to say with that, but hope he drops it for the time being. 
Umemiya stares at you seriously. It makes your breath hitch meeting his eyes, blue with all the depth in the world. You feel like you can't pull yourself from his gaze.  
"And there was never a possibility? Not once that I could've liked you? That I wanted to be with you?"  
"It doesn't matter." You say. "And no, it never crossed my mind.."  
"Stop saying it doesn't matter. Of course it matters. Your feelings matter the most so don't toss them aside so easily. Do you really believe that you're not right for me?"  
You aren’t sure how to answer him.  
"You think you're not good enough for me." He says with some realization more than asks.  
It's the first time you see his face change. When you look up, he looks well and truly angry. The whole thing is confusing.  
"I'm sorry," You say. It’s such a timid thing to say but you don’t know how else to fix.  
"It's not—I just don't like hearing you talk about yourself like that. I don't like hearing someone I love get spoken about like that.” 
You ignore the sentiment again and wait in the quiet. You always thought this would be an easier conversation to have but it hurts.  
He sighs a bit, getting closer to you again. He’s less upset than before but there’s something else in his expression.  
"You wanted to know why I was upset earlier right? It's because of you and Nirei-kun." He admits.  
"What about him?"  
"You talked about marrying him so casually. I overheard and it bothered me all night."  
Your eyes go wide.  
"I—it wasn't serious."  
"I know that. I never thought I was that childish either but you being married to someone else as a joke." He laughs humorlessly. "I really hated it. That’s why I asked if you know how much I like you."  
You feel frozen in place by his admission. 
Umemiya steps towards you faster than you can muster up a counter for why he shouldn’t bother.  
His arms around you feel sudden. His grip on you is so tight, like you could slip through his arms all at once if he loosens it. He smells like cologne and beer and summer but it's not unpleasant. He rests his chin on your head and lets out a deep breath.  
Your chest is throbbing for different reasons now. Shit. Shit, shit, shit.  
"If you won't be greedy, then you should at least let me be." He lets out a long, tense breath "At least let me have what I want." 
You're stuck. Your mouth moves faster than your brain.  
"Why me? And why now?"  
Umemiya pulls away to stare down at you. You can't bring yourself to turn away from him. 
"It was always you. I felt guilty... for wanting to you that way when you were a precious friend. Wanting to treat you delicately when you were strong and proud." He admits. Hearing him say that out loud embarrasses you to no end, “But it was those things that made me love you. Strong yet clumsy. Prideful yet honest. Awkward yet trying to be gentle. Loyal. And always considerate of everyone. Of me, when I was taking care of everyone else."  
Your stomach feels like it's going to erupt. You're losing your resolve faster than you know how to mend it.  
"Stop saying stuff like that."  
Umemiya holds you tighter and shakes his head. "No. How else will I get you to change your mind?"  
"I won't change my mind." You say stubbornly.  
"I love you." He repeats.  
You squirm.  
"Stop it,"  
"I want to be with you. I want to kiss you. I want to hold you. I want to stay by your side forever. I want to do things with you and make you feel good. I want to make you smile. I want to grow old with you." 
Your hearts fluttering. Fuck.  
"Idiot. What are you saying? Let me go."  
"It has to be you for me. I won't have anyone else no matter what you think. The person I love is you. I love you."  
"Hajime." Your voice is shaking. 
His drops down to a whisper.  
“I can’t change how you think of yourself overnight but I can tell you that there’s no point in trying to push me away. Whether or not you accept  me, we’ll never stop being side by side - so please stop fighting it.”  
You put your hands on his chest, trying to push him away. “Stop it,” 
"Please tell me it's okay to love you how I want too," He says, soft and doting while he crushes you in his arms. "And please love me in return."  
You put your hands up to your misty eyes wanting to wipe them away as he melts through the rest of your resolve like it's nothing. It's hard not to be moved. You've been pretending for ten long years that you don't love him at all and he's declaring his love for you like it's the easiest, most sensible and sane thing in the world.  
A kind-hearted, willful, meddling idiot. How you are you supposed to push him away when he's holding you this tight?  
"Shit," You voice, huffing as your voice shakes. "Don’t be stupid, alright? If you’re so insistent, I wont let you back out if you meet someone else."  
He laughs wetly.  
"I already tried meeting other people, but it's still you. Always was."  
He smiles above you. 6'2 with watery eyes with the look of pure relief like it's the best news he's ever heard in his life. It's too much for you. Your heart is racing so fast you wonder if you're gonna die.  
"Can I kiss you?" He asks.  
Your eyes go wide as you look away, not wanting to look too eager. "That's..."  
He makes another puppy-dog kinda face. "Please?"  
You're embarrassed by how easy it makes you give in. "...Do whatever you want."  
He laughs bright and warm as his hands slide up to cup your cheeks and kiss you with all the passion he can muster. It's intense, almost suffocating the way he slots his lips against yours and breathes you in. He doesn't let you up from it, doesn't part from you for a second even when he pulls away - noses brushing and stealing the air from your lungs.  
It's your stupid first kiss and it's perfect - so perfect you wonder if you're going to wake up in a dream. He kisses you hard and makes you stand on your toes to chase his lips when he pulls back. Elated. Ecstatic when you grasp the front of his shirt and keep kissing him when he stops. 
He pauses before littering your whole face with pecks even as you weakly protest, unable to stop frowning but feeling the happiest you've ever been.  
There's so much longing in between you, you feel like you could die. You feel helpless.   
"Can I come home with you?" He asks, once he stops - only holding your hand a short distance away. "I want more time together." 
You feel your skin burn hot as you nod, all while trying not to read too much into it. 
"Yeah."  
__ 
You barely get to lock your door behind you before Umemiya crowds you in the door way.  
His arms circle around your waist, chin resting against your shoulder.. Broad chest against your back, you try not to flounder as his warm voice caresses your ear.  
You're going to die young if he keeps this up.   
"I love you,"  
You flush. "Enough already. And let me go so I can wash up."  
"Do you need to sleep early? Thought you were closed tomorrow. Wanted to talk a little longer."  
You pause.  
"...Sleep?" 
"Hm?"  
You both freeze as the miscommunication dawns at the same time. You try to pull away from him as soon as you realize, skin burning hot. You're quick but Umemiya is quicker.  
"Hajime." You say gravely. "If you don't let me go, I'm gonna kill you."  
"No way," He laughs  as you attempt to wriggle out of his grasp. "Is that why you let me in? Were you expecting something?"  
"Shut up! Don't say anything, I swear I'll —"  
"Don't be like that, baby. I'm not making fun of you. Hey, turn around. Look at me."  
You're upset but you think the reason is more embarrassing then the feeling.  
"Don't wanna,"  
Umemiya laughs as he gently turns you around to face him. In your utter mortification, you can barely bring yourself to meet his gaze.  
"Stop staring."  
He doesn't.  
"Do you normally invite guys in just 'cause they ask?"  
"Wha—no! It's because it's you, stupid!"  
He smiles in satisfaction.  
"You shouldn't say yes so easily even if it is me. What if I took advantage of you?"  
You think he's just being smug for the sake of it, which is pissing you off. You grab him by the front of his shirt.  
"Fuck off. Maybe there's a reason I said yes."  
He pauses before his eyes widen. You push your hand against his mouth before he blurt anything else out but he's quick to pry your hand away.  
"Don't say it." You hiss.  
"I was planning on taking my time. I cherish you and I want to make sure you know that. I'm just a little surprised you’re moving so quick when you were telling me not too long ago."  
You can feel the tips of your ears growing hot, feeling even more self-conscious. "Whatever. If we're just going to sleep I still need to wash up."  
He keeps his arms behind your back so you can’t move.  
"Hey. Didn't say that. It's not like I don't want to do it with you. Just don't want you to regret anything."  
You give him an flat look. "I was prepared to give you my virginity and you're worrying about that. Unless you're planning on backing out, there's no way I would."  
"Your—" His jaw drops a little.  
You drop your voice down just a little close as you grab his collar.  
"If you get it, then hurry up and fuck me. Stupid Hajime."  
He gives you the dopiest smile you've ever seen while your face grows increasingly hot, leaning to in to press a kiss to your lips. He brushes his nose with yours. Laughter from deep in his chest.  
"Yes, ma'am."  
__ 
Once you give Umemiya permission to have you, you get the feeling that there really is no going back from here.  
You both know it. The tension in your bedroom is so thick you can barely breathe around it.  
Umemiya lands gently onto your bed - sitting up as he holds you by your waist and pulls you over to him. You're so aware of his touch it makes your nerves feel they're on fire. You're not a total virgin - at least not enough to be feeling this worked up over someones hands lingering on your waist.  
But they're Umemiya's hands—Hajime's hands, so you can't rationalize your thoughts of out it. His hands are strong and big, a little calloused and rough from the gardening and fighting. You can feel how much he adores you in a gesture so small it makes you concerned for your own heart thinking about how the rest of the night will go.  
He invites you into his lap gently, so pleased by the way you go to him so willingly. You spread yourself over him with your knees on either side of his thighs. He's big - wide and broad.  
Your barely hovering over his bulge as you lean your weight onto him. His hand barely brushes underneath your top, just barely touching the skin.  
You shiver.  
"Are you really sure this is what you want?" He asks. "I don't mind waiting as long as you need,"  
You give him an bored look. "Not very convincing when you're makin' a face like that,"  
He chuckles nervously. "That bad?"  
You nod before adding a little bashfully. "Dunno if I mind, though."  
He buries his fact against your chest all of a sudden making you jump.  
"The hell?"  
"You're so cute when you're honest like that," He mumbles into your chest, cheek pressed against your tits.  
"Jeez, shut up. What're you talking about?"  
Umemiya pulls back and leans forward - enough to breach the inches of space between you. Nose to nose, your eyes meet. A bated breath, you put your hand on his shoulders and work up the nerve to kiss him.  
It's chaste. Mostly for you to break the ice otherwise you're sure you're gonna pussy out.  
He smiles at you when you pull away.  
"See what I mean? So cute," He hums, and leans in again. "Come on. Kiss me again."  
Something about him is different when he tells you to kiss him. It's not smug or cheeky. But it's not casual either. Softness tinges his words, his touch - his whole demeanor screams like he loves you absolutely. It makes your heart rate pick up again, hands shaky as you try not to lose your nerve.  
He's restraining himself though. How he intense he could be vs how soft and calm he is being. You know Umemiya like the back of your hand so you want him to do what he wants. It's hard to find your voice.  
"You don't have to.." You cast your eyes down in embarrassment. "…hold back with me, either. I'm not some maiden."  
He smiles at you a little. "You really do know me better than anyone, huh? I was keeping it together pretty well."  
"Look I know I’m kinda difficult…I'm not real good with stuff like this either," You fidget with the collar of his shirt with your free hand. "But once I say yes I don’t back out. So don't worry about scaring me off or putting too much pressure on me or whatever. ...'s fine to just do what you feel like. I’m scared out of my mind but I wouldn’t do that to you,"  
“Don’t know how long it’ll take but I’ll do my best to make you feel secure. Might take some time but we’ve got our whole lives.” You flush at the implication. He smiles a little. "Whatever I want seems like a lot to give, though."  
"Well...depending on what, I'm might not be good at it,"   
He shakes his head. "I don't want anything like that."  
"What do you want then?"  
"You." He says easily. Your stomach flips. "All of you. I just want to make you feel so good you can't stand it. Want to worship you top to bottom. There's not a single part of you I don't want."  
You flush. "The hell... I meant like a blowjob or some shit."  
He laughs. "I know. And I want that too, another time." He hums, taking a deep breath. "Right now I just want you to feel so good for me. Is that okay?"  
You can't look at him. You can barely stand how bashful you're being, but you can't even play coy. Something in you is bursting at the seams.  
You love him so much you don't recognize yourself, or your voice, or how you're acting. It makes you sick but you can’t do anything but go with it. "Yeah. 's okay, if it's what you want."  
"It is," He says, leaning in. "All I've ever wanted."  
You ignore the latter half of his comment as he finally goes to kiss you again.  
He pulls your body close to him as you do. Until your chest to chest, arms wrapped around the span of his shoulders as you press your lips together soft and slow.  
He slides a hand underneath your top, undoing the clasp of your bra. He lets his palm stay on the center of your back while you keep kissing - straps of your bra falling down your shoulder as he splays his fingers to feel more of your skin and hold you. Hugging you close to him, his other arm wraps around your torso. His forearms feels especially strong they way they hold you by the waist.  
You're so close to him. Kissing him so deep, his tongue sliding against your lips. Something about the kiss is languid but the touch is so hot it makes your skin burn. You feel wrapped up in him, can't even tell whose heartbeat you're hearing. 
More of your weight ends up in his lap as you feel your knees go weak. Something hard presses against your clothed cunt and you gasp a little into his mouth.  
"Oh, shit." You mumble in surprise. Umemiya laughs.  
"You're making me feel good." He hums.  
Your face heats up. "I barely did anything." 
"You just being on my lap is more than enough."  
You make a face at him before rubbing yourself over the zipper of his jeans, slow and deliberate trying to get a feel for it. You hear him moan, nearly jumping out of your skin in surprise.  
The way Umemiya moans is a lot for you to process. Breathy and a little low. It resonates through your whole body like a caress.  
You make a few more tentative passes over his bulge, just to hear him do it again. Driven by your instinct more than anything, you lean into kiss at his jaw - making use of the limited experience you do have to try and draw more sounds from him.  
"What're you thinking about?" He asks, still breathless. Maybe amused.  
"Like the way you sound." You mumble in reply.  
"I thought I told you I wanted to take care of you, hm?"  
You frown. "So what? I can't touch you at all?"  
He thinks on it. "You can touch me everywhere else and you can have your way with me later, if you want it. I don't wanna cum too fast."  
"I'm just..."  
He shakes his head. "You're underestimating me. I'm still a guy, you know? With a woman I love at that. There's no way I would make it through our first time if I didn't focus on you. Don't pout,"  
Hearing him describe you in such an embarrassing way makes you flush. You roll your eyes half-heartedly. "Fine, whatever."  
He smiles.  
"Good girl. C'mere. Lay down."  
You decide not to think about how effected the praise makes you as you comply.  
Umemiya lays you down carefully, making sure you're comfortable before hovering over you. He looks a lot more imposing from this view - the dim lights of your room making his face seem more well-defined. Your nipples harden in arousal, peeking from underneath your shirt as he stares long and hard.  
"You're so beautiful to me."  
He leans down and presses a hot kiss to your jaw, just underneath your ear before slowly kissing down your neck. Open-mouthed kisses along delicate skin, tongue sliding over every patch he scrapes lightly with his teeth. You fidget underneath him, a dull throbbing between your legs. You try to figure out what to do with your hands but you’re too nervous.  
He kisses your throat where it's extra sensitive and you bite back and involuntary noise. 
"Don't hold your voice, please?"  
"It's embarrassing,"  
"It's not," He assures, bumping his forehead to your shoulder lightly. "I want to know what makes you feel good. Let me pay attention to you."  
You frown but nod ultimately.  
Umemiya isn't the first sexual encounter you've had in your life. You've done other things, but you've never really gone all the way with anyone. All of your other partners were mostly strangers - people mutually interested in using someone else to try and get off.  
This is the first time anyone has taken this much time with you. A little kissing and groping, sometimes touching your chest.  
No one's ever touched you like this, though.  
His hands feel like they're all over your body no matter where they actually end up being. Makes your heartbeat rain drumming on a tin roof. Makes your stomach tingle, a heat in your calves and a prickly feeling on your back. Your whole being drowning with pure anticipation.  
"Take this off for me." Umemiya mumbles. You nod, feeling absent as you wiggle yourself out of your tight little tee and toss it somewhere.  
The air shifts again when you're naked. His eyes drink you in, tracing the soft lines and edges of your body. Looking over scars and stretchmarks with pure, blown out wanting that shoots lust straight into your veins.  
You want him to fuck you so bad it's killing you but the very thought makes you feel so shy you could die.  
"You're beautiful," Sounds dirty the way he says, makes it spill from his lips like wine tipping over a glasses edge. "Perfect. Every inch of you is so perfect."  
He proves this to you by kissing you again. Running his hands over your skin. Up against curved sides and down against your arms, brushing the back of your biceps and forearms.  
Infatuation in his touch ruins you. Makes your voice let out. You can't think of anyone whose treated you so preciously in your entire life and you find you don't resent it as much as you should.  
(You find it feels so good to let someone touch you so kindly. A touch like you're being loved.)  
Nonetheless it's embarrassing. Of course it is.  
But it's so hard not to feel pulled in when you feel the way he kisses you. Draws a trail with his lips and tongue from jaw to shoulder blade - kissing down your biceps with his hands on your body, taking  gentle inhales of your scent.  
Anticipation makes your stomach tie in knots but finally he relents. Both hands squeeze the soft weight of your chest, palms brushing your hardened nipples.  
"Fuck."  
He laughs a little, heavy with want. "Yeah? Do you like being touched here?"  
"Mm." Is the best reply you can get out.  
He brushes against the tips with his fingers in a feather-light gesture, testing the waters before rubbing with a little more pressure. Your body jolts from the stimulation, wetness pooling and dampening your underwear. He leans in and takes one of your nipples into his mouth making another dull wave of lust wash through you.  
And he makes sure to pay attention to both. It's just like him to be so attentive to some shit like that. Your spine arches as he sucks on your sensitive nipples, letting his tongue flick across them and giving into a sweet friction. You buck your hips up against instinctively, gripping onto the sheets as your sense of restlessness grows.  
Your voice is whiny to your own ears but you can't calm down to save your life.  
"You're taking too long," You huff. He laughs lightly, looking up at you from underneath his lashes.  
"Don't be impatient." He tsks.  
"It's enough already," 
He shakes his head. "Nope. Still got a long ways to go. Promise you'll have me when you're ready for it, so just try and focus on feeling good."  
You make a frustrated sound. "It's embarrassing being the only one feeling good,"  
He pauses before standing up on his knees. He takes his black t-shirt off in one swift go until his torso is bare, and undoes the top button of his pants. He gives you a little glance. "Better?"  
There are too many layers of that to process in the moment it happens. You mumble. "A little,"  
He beams. "Good. Now let me take good care of you,"  
Sliding down lower, he kisses you from sternum to navel. Hands gripping at the softness of your sides, smoothing over the bare skin as he his thumb finds the waistband of your skirt. He glances up at you, silently seeking your permission. You nod back at him, watching him slide the short skirt away from your waist.  
The sudden air feels cool against your skin. He presses his cheek against your belly, both hands on your hips..  
"You're gorgeous. Even more gorgeous than I thought. I feel so lucky being able to touch you when you're this perfect.” He praises endlessly.  
You cover your face with your arm.  
"Ugh. Quit it. You're sayin' too much."  
"Seeing you get so shy when I praise you a little is so cute." He trails his lips down further and further - just above your sex before stopping. "You're so cute."  
He sits back, standing up and bending your legs slightly at the knee. You hold the position as you feel him massage your calve. Thumb drawing hard circles in the muscle, slowly working his way up to your knee. He kisses you afterwards trailing the same spot his hands were touching seconds ago before moving onto the other side.  
There's nothing you can call it short of worship. The nagging feeling that it's undeserved is washed away each time Umemiya holds your gaze.  
Devotion colors every touch no matter how small. And it’s so obvious, so prominent - it feels outright wrong to deny the fact it’s there.   
You think the closest thing you can compare it too is the way Umemiya gardens. A patience as his fingers root through earth and soil, a kindness towards delicate things that makes even hours of work under the sun look beautiful and easy. His expression is what's most uncanny - what makes you you feel so hot. 
An expression that says he loves doing it from the very bottom of his heart - not even a hint of apathy or complaint.  
A face that says he loves every long, drawn out motion and actions of repetition all fro the very core of him.  
Having it directed at making love to you so blatantly makes you more aroused than you know what to do with. You don't know how to let yourself be treated like the most cherished flower in Umemiya's garden - and you aren't so sure how you're meant to get used to it no matter how much it makes you feel...nice. You don’t have any other experience.  
Which is why you're trying to be patient. Trying to be at least temporarily secure in whatever he sees in you that makes him worship every inch of you, memorizing all your ins and outs.  
Umemiya places hot, wet kisses on your inner thigh before laying himself between your spread legs - breath barely hovering over your sex.  
By the time he gets there, you feel utterly melted into your sheets. Your mind is hazy, impatient and wanting as strong hands secure your thighs. He's so close.  
"I wanna eat you out. Is that okay?"  
"If you don't do something soon I'm gonna kill you."  
He laughs warmly. "I'll take that as a yes."  
You pause. Umemiya waits.  
"I didn't uh," You clear your throat. "Wasn't planning on getting laid so y'know. Haven't shaved in a while."  
"Were you worried that I'd change my mind? I like it for the record. Feels natural." Umemiya says. "It's your body so there's nothing I would dislike about it."  
"You're too much." You reply back in earnest. You cover your face with your arms. "So cheesy."  
"I'm being serious." He says suddenly solemn with how sincere he is. 
The sudden change is amusing. You pause before breaking into genuine giggles, unable to help yourself.  
"You're really somethin', yknow that?"  
He's quiet for a long time. Long enough for it to catch your attention, turning your gaze more clearly towards his face. Swiftly, he pushes himself up to catch your mouth in another kiss. It stuns you a bit, very different to all the rest. More teeth and tongue than lip.  
"I like you," He murmurs, forehead to yours. "How can someone be so cute?"  
"Would you quit embarrassing me and get on with it?" 
He smiles. "As you wish,"  
Umemiya settles back down between your legs after easing your panties off and putting your feet flat on the bed to give himself more access. You can barely look down at him doing it. His fingers brush the slick hairs back gentle as he uses his thumbs to spread your pussy apart and look at you more intimately.  
You can feel him. Feel his every breath and movement. He stares at you awestruck. "How is all of you so pretty? Even here it's such a beautiful color."  
"Stop looking so much,"  
He takes a breath, taking in your scent one more time before pressing a kiss to your clit. You make an attempt to squirm away from his grip as his finger dig into your thighs and hold you down. The strength of it knocks the wind out of you, forcing you into place. Umemiya pushes his tongue and gives you a long, tentative lick through the seam of your cunt.  
Your whole body breaks out into shivers at the sensation. The warm weight of his tongue on your sex makes feels like an electric current through water - your toes curling as he makes the same few passes over and over. He collects your pooling arousal on the tip as he drags upwards and flicks your clit tentatively. You grind against his face instinctually, hips chasing the pleasure. Amused laughter vibrates against your core as you do, mumbling at you to be patient while he's still face deep in it.  
You let out another pitchy whine before he finally stops teasing. He lays his tongue flat against your clit, cupping it lightly before drawing it around experimentally. He watches carefully as he plays around with pressure and angles - trying to see what makes you react the most. You can feel how closely he's watching you. 
You cover your mouth with your hand when he does find it, your voice breaking off as he licks carefully right where you need. He smiles into your cunt as he toys with your with the sensitive bundle of nerves, pleased by the change in your reactions. The obvious pleasure he's making you feel.  
Something blooms into your chest. You've never— 
"You're—" You close your eyes, hands tangling in the sheets as you break out into a fever. "Ngh, never had someone l-lick me,"  
He must've heard you because he seems to laser in his focus the minute you say it. He's lapping at your clit so deep, licking precisely and holding you with nose against your bush.  
You reach down tentatively, pushing back the hair falling in his face and he gives you a look so lovesick you want to run away. The pressure changes gradually, more intensely.  
It feels better somehow. Makes you feel restless. Your whole body curls in tight with want at the sensation of it, the lower expanse of your belly tensed. You're shaking as you drift closer to the edge, arousal upped by the wet sound of him sucking your clit.  
"Hajime," You warn, spine starting to arch as you helplessly try to pull away from the intense sensation. It's not familiar to your body, so much so your mind can barely make sense of what's happening to it, "Cumming—c-cumming!"  
Something in you goes undone as Umemiya keeps pace during your orgasm. All the tension inside of you suddenly comes loose - specks of white matter behind closed lids as you screw your eyes shut. Your back curves up into arch, your hips trembling, your insides pulsing. It comes running into you, crashing into your body as waves of pleasure drown out the noise in your head. He eats you out until you feel borderline hysterical.  
You feel melted and reshaped by him - yanking him off when he continues to be insistent after you're too oversensitive. He laughs when you pull him away, resting against your thigh as you take worn out heaving breaths.  
He kisses the inside of your knee as you calm down, bright smile on his features - painted pink with a slight flush. "You came. I'm so happy."  
You look at him in shock. "You're a scary guy."  
He pushes up to kiss your temple, voice soft. "Did I scare you?"  
Your stomach flutters, tucking your chin. "You were intense, but I didn't... hate it or anything."  
"Yeah?" He grins, pressing a few kisses to your cheek and face before whispering against your ear. "Then, is it okay to go farther?"  
You nod silently. Umemiya smiles.  
He stands up on his knees, pushing his hair back as your eyes are drawn to his pants. You reach out for the waistband of his pants unthinkingly, hooking your finger into it. "Isn't it stuffy?"  
He blinks, frozen before rubbing a hand across his face. "Ah a bit, but it's fine."  
"Take 'em off. Please?"  
Umemiya looks unusually distressed by the request, but follows through without another word. You watch him undress - revealing the tight black fabric of his boxer briefs snug against his waist. Your eyes go wide as you see the outline of his cock - head still half hazy. You voice your unfiltered reaction.  
"Your dick is so big,"  
He laughs breathlessly. "Are you trying to stir me up? What's with you?" He pauses to lay down besides you. You turn to lay on your side and face him a little better. "You're being cute. I'm not used to seeing you so docile."  
"Shaddup," You reply half-heartedly. Your body is still on fire but it knocked the wind of you to cum once already. "Your fault."  
He grins, a hint of smugness as he laughs. "That's true."  
"You gonna fuck me?"  
"Mm, yeah. Gotta open you up first or it'll hurt."  
"I've put stuff in before. Toys. Should be fine."   
"Still wanna play it safe. It's your precious first time after all."  
You make a face before pulling him into you, hugging him tight as your whole body breaks out in a shameful flush. "Then hurry up and do it already."  
His arms slide underneath where your laying, holding you to him as he hikes one of your legs up. He slides his free hand in over your leg - his forearm holding your thigh. You press your face to his neck and shoulder - hiding your expression. "Guess I should huh? You were always impatient,"  
You can barely tell him to shut up, the way your body waits for it. A warbled little noise leaves your mouth as he slides his middle finger through the sticky folds of your cunt - careful as it catches on your hole. Wet and so aroused, the first finger he puts in goes in completely smoothly with no real effort 
Umemiya speaks low and soft as he holds you. "I don't know if I can get used to seeing you like this. I'm glad no one else but me ever wil You’re really all I think about lately," He catches the lobe of your ear between his teeth gently. Your head spins. "People misunderstand you because you're prickly, you know? For a long time, only I knew what it felt like to be liked by you. I liked that,"  
"Why are you—mmgh," 
He slides another finger in carefully after the first one slides inside of you with no resistance. His voice is so hot against your skin, the low bass of it in your skull as he speaks so close to your ear.  
"Don't get me wrong I'm happy seeing you with so many people surrounding you. But I was a little sad too. And it kept getting worse over the years until I couldn’t ignore it. I couldn’t figure out why for a long time and then it clicked,” Umemiya explains. You realize half way delirious this is his real confession. God, you’re gonna kill him. “Suddenly it was all I thought about. I wanted to be special to you. I wanted to monopolize you. It was my first time having thoughts like that,”  
Another finger slides into you easily. Umemiyas fingers are so much bigger than yours. Thicker than they are long. The stretch is enough to make you gasp.  
“Hajime—“ 
He curls them up, careful until he finds the spot he’s looking for. Your body reacts, another sensation of pressure as his middle finger rubs tenderly against your gspot. You weakly try to wiggle away as he holds you firm.  
“I felt a little guilty, too. You’re my very best friend. You’re independent and diligent. Tough. But you know, when I saw you for those few months - all I could think about was how much I wanted to spoil you,” He whispers. Something in your body shifts the way touches you. Pushes in further and further - stretching until it’s easy for him to be inside. “Somehow everything I liked about you became so cute I couldn’t stand it. I couldn’t help but want to dote on you over every little thing even though I knew better than anyone you didn’t need something like that.”  
Your eyes well up but not necessarily from emotion. Totally overwhelmed. You don’t feel like you’re gonna cum but there’s something else that’s waiting and each time he thrusts his fingers into you it comes a little closer. Your voice is shaking.  
“It—fuck, quit talking. Somethings gonna—“  
His smile grows a little. It’s the first time it looks so hungry.  
“I was happy in general when I realized you liked me too. Even when you were being stubborn, I liked the way you couldn’t turn me away. I liked how happy you looked talking to me as usual as if that alone was something so precious,” He hums, so focused and precise as he stretches you open on a third finger but never once losing his train of thought. Like saying all of these comes to him so easily it doesn’t matter. “I didn’t want to corner you. But it felt like I couldn’t rest until you were mine completely. Which is why I’m being so unfair to you. Why I’m so persistent. ” 
Your voice breaks on a whine. “It’s gonna come out—“  
“You make a pretty face when your heads filled with nothing but me. I don’t think it’s bad to wanna stay that way,” He hums, almost conversational as he presses a kiss to your skin. “Go on. Let go,”  
Something hot sprays between your legs as Umemiya fucks you open on all three of his fingers.  
A rush of warm liquid squirts onto your sheets as your legs shake wearily. Umemiya marvels at the mess. Your hands curl into fists, nails digging in your palms as he finally pulls them out - leaving you stretched, almost gaping.  
You lay limp in soaked sheets as you pull away from Umemiya with a very weak glare.  
He’s smiling at you, dopey and lovesick.  
“Too much?”  
Angrily, you smack at his bare chest over and over, trying to recover your pride.  
“You’re insane. What’s,” You swallow thickly. “What’s with you.”  
He shrugs. Wordless, he flips you onto your back again before hovering over top of you. Pressing his forehead to yours, he brushes your noses together and plants a tentative peck on your lips as if trying to gauge whether or not you’re upset. He melts when you kiss him back, smiling happily.  
“Were you like this with your other girlfriends? No wonder they broke up with you,”  
He laughs. “Mm, no? I was more of a gentleman.”  
You break out into another exhausted fit of laughter.  
“Pfft, yeah? Guess I’m pretty special,” 
“Yeah. You are.” He kisses you again. “Wanna keep going or are you too tired? I don’t mind if we sleep.”  
“Stupid. I said it already didn’t I? Hurry up and fuck me.”  
“Okay, okay. Let me go get the condom from my wallet,”  
You wrap your legs around his waist and stare up at him plainly as he tries to move, keeping him pinned in place. You’re frowning, brows furrowed with a hard glare. He stares at you.  
“Did you want something else? Water?”  
“Want you to fuck me,” You restate, arms reaching up to circle around his neck. “Just do it already.” 
He pulls back to look at you seriously.  
“Do you know what you’re asking?”  
You flush. “Of course I do. Stupid. Are you trying to get me to say it out loud?”  
“I might think I’m deluding myself otherwise.”  
You sigh, looking at him flatly as you try to tamp down the part of you that’s screaming to be more tactful.  
“Don’t bother with the condom, a-alright? Or pulling out,”  
He looks like he’s experiencing the shock of his life. “But…” 
“Stop being dumb or I’m never gonna have sex with you again.”  
He nods suddenly solemn. “Fine. But,”  
You give him another look that silences him. He sighs again, getting the message before kissing your cheek and pull back to sit up on his knees between your legs. Pulling his briefs down, his cock springs free. It looks a lot bigger than you saw underneath the fabric, weighed down from it’s own weight even though it stands up stiff. He opened you up with three but you wonder if it’ll be enough not to stretch you open.  
You reach your hand out to touch it tentatively, feeling it’s weight and heft. He clears his throat but seems content to let you. The palms of your hands cup the shaft, feeling all the veins pulse. The tip is sticky with precum. You pull your hand away, another sudden wave of self consciousness overwhelming you.  
Umemiya hovers over you again, placing he length of his cock against your pussy. You shift a little feeling it slide against you, hard and hot.  
“Gonna put it in now, okay?”  
Nodding, you put your legs up. You take a deep breath when the head pushes in, letting out an involuntary noise. You feel well-stretched but the thickness of his cock is still enough to make you feel it in your legs. Umemiya is focused above you, barely sliding the tip through your folds as you open up around him. The air feels punched out of your lungs on just the first inch.  
His face is strained is he holds his hips steady, leaning down to tap your foreheads together. “Feeling okay?”  
“Mm,” You nod, wrapping your arms around his neck. “Fine. Feels different.”  
“Different?”  
“Yours is bigger than all the stuff I own,” You explain. “Feels hotter. Harder, too.”  
You feel his cock twitch inside of you suddenly, shocking you. He smiles sheepishly.  
“Gonna push in a little more, okay?”  
You nod, watching as Umemiya so slowly presses his cock into you further. Enough that it doesn’t hurt when you take him, as much as it just feels like something is inside of you. You feel a warm sense of satisfaction at how full you feel. You feel like him like he’s in your stomach, taking up so much space. After a while of pushing, stopping, and going again  - he finally bottoms out.  
“You feel incredible,” He murmurs, half-smile on his face. Your stomach flutters. “It’s hard not to cum right away. Feels so good inside of you. I love you.”  
You feel yourself twitch, frowning at the expression of delight Umemiya has. You put your hand against his fact to keep him away but he kisses your palm and moves it. Bottomed out, he grasps both hands and holds them  - pinning them to the bed as you watch him wide-eyed.  
“Think you’re used to it?” He hums, clasping your fingers together. “Is it okay if I move?”  
You feel so damn bashful. “It’s okay.” 
He kisses your forehead. “I’ll go slow.” 
As promised, Umemiya pulls out carefully before pushing back into you. You’re so wet that it slides in without any real friction. It takes a few thrusts of him going slowly for your body to get adjusted to the sensation. After a few motions, though - it starts to feel different.  
Starts to feel good. Really, really good.  
“Oh,” Your eyes flutter open. “Shit. You c-can go faster.”   
“Yeah?”  
You nod, trying not to seem too eager. 
When Umemiya picks up pace, you feel your  the whole lower half of your body weaken all over again. Something in your legs, your spine go soft against the bed underneath, a sudden unusual arousal swelling. Somewhere in deeper as he cocks thrusts against your gspot, knocking against it with more force than before. The change in pace coupled with the visual of Umemiya over you, face drawn together in focus as he fucks you is too much. Split open on his cock, you can hear how wet you are each time he moves.  
“Feels…” Your words come up empty. “’s so much.” 
“Yeah? Is it too much for you, baby?”  
You shake your head as your thoughts get increasingly cloudy. It’s like there’s nothing else your body can focus on. The way his cock drags against your sensitive, silken walls. The feeling of being full to empty and then full all over again. The way your pussy gets so much wetter each time he moves, sloppy and sucking him in so tight. You can feel your body want for him.  
Umemiya lets go of your hands, sliding one between your bodies. Palm resting on your sex, he lets his brush against your clit. The difference it makes is significant, makes your eyes go wide. He smiles a little, hair falling in his face as he pushes it up with his free hand.  
“That’s it,” He hums, contented to keep at it like this. “Feels good, right? Your holding onto me so tightly it’s hard for me to pull out even though you’re so wet.”  
You make a whiny noise and wonder if other peoples first times feel this good or if you’re just outrageously lucky. You decide on the latter he fucks you faster and matches his thrusts with the movement of his fingers. You’re warm all over - skin scorching as your hands find his biceps and shoulders to cling onto.  
Your voice is so whiny when you call out for him “You’re so deep, ngh.”  
He laughs, deep and raspy. “Yeah? Tell me what you’re feeling,”  
“It feels good when you’re in me.” You reply drunkenly. “Want it faster. Please,”  
He complies with your request almost immediately. You cry out loud, physically incapable of holding the sound in as he gets to fucking you faster and harder. Your pussy is throbbing. Senselessly horny, you pull Umemiya closer to you as he fucks you and smash your lips together. You feel so good, so thoroughly fucked and completely out of it. He’s in you but you want him even closer, want the scent of his skin to mark you.  
A second time your body builds up to that familiar feeling but it’s so much farther inside. An orgasm pulled right from your core. Stomach tied in knots as Umemiya fucks you hard, you wrap your legs around his waist and take him. 
“That’s it. You’re so good. Cum on my cock, sweet girl. Let me feel it” He murmurs against your skin, holding you close. “You’re making me feel so good. So cute. Go ahead, it’s okay. Let me see how good I’m making you feel.”  
Pliant to his request, you hold onto Umemiya for dear life as your body gives into second orgasm. Your nails dig into his biceps as the built up arousal gives way pleasure - and you cum hard with his cock sheathed all the way inside of you. All the wind gets stolen from your lungs as you press forward with another kiss, your whole body trembling violently as you let go.  
Umemiya sweet talks you through without letting go once, only stopping to take a pause when you’ve fully ridden out your high.  
You stare up at him in a daze as he takes a breather to kiss you, still hard as he’s bottomed out inside of you.  
“You gonna cum soon?”  
“Mm,” He nods. “Yeah I’m close. If I move, I will.”  
“’s okay to cum in me,”  
Umemiya laughs warmly. “I’m already about too. You’re not helping,”  
You smile a bit as you hug him close to you and tell him again that it’s fine. Before long, he holds you too, whispering the same three words into your neck as he finally lets it out. It’s a weird feeling, thick white ropes of seed spilling into the deepest parts of you.  
You don’t really hate it, though.  
“I love you,” Umemiya repeats. Tired you don’t try to fight yourself.  
“Love you too,”  
__ 
The next morning, you’re stirred away by the sound of your front door unlocking and the sound of Kotoha’s voice echoing through your apartment.  
You’re still half-way asleep, so it barely dawns on you that anything is off. Not cognizant enough to think twice, your body tries to go back to sleep.  
Or it does until you hear a very loud shout coming from your kitchen that wakes you up with a start.  
“No fucking way,”  
You sit up suddenly, hearing faint conversation before the sound of steps barreling towards your door. You just barely manage to pull the sheets up over your chest before she comes storming through the door of your bedroom.  
You watch her eyes scan your entire room, mentally collecting data before she finally lands on you. As your brain starts to load back in, your eyes go wide with horror at the look of pure scandal on her face.  
Fuck. You were supposed to be having dinner with her and Tsubaki tonight. Usually you confirm with them in the mornings since your up. It’s not uncommon for her to drop in when you don’t reply to check in since you live close by. 
Fuck.  
“You—Oh, I have to text Tsubaki-chan, I can’t believe—“  
Before she gets to finish her sentence, Umemiya appears behind her in your door way. The sight of him only adds fuel to the flame of your embarrassment. You went another round or two before bed last night and it looks like it too. Shirtless in sweats he left over a while ago, his biceps are covered in scratch and with a few hickies, he’s wearing his hair down with a cup of tea and a very apologetic smile.  
You cover your face with your hands unsure of how to deal with the feeling of pure mortification.  
Kotoha snaps a picture of your room that causes even more distress.  
“If you don’t delete that right now, I’m gonna kill us both.”  
“In your dreams.”  
Umemiya laughs warmly. “Please don’t kill each other.”  
He slides past Kotoha coming over to you. Bending down to kiss your forehead, he pulls the blanket up over you so you’re more well-covered. You give him an incredulous but Umemiya is unfazed - smiling as bright as ever. 
“Good morning,”  
“I can’t believe my eyes,” Kotoha says. She points at Umemiya. “You, go put on a shirt.”  
“Fine, fine. Stay for breakfast,” Umemiya says with a smile. “It’ll be nice having it with my two favorite people.”  
You make another face as Umemiya gives you a long, affectionate look before disappearing. She sighs as she looks at you, pinching the bridge of her nose.  
“I would ask if you’re gonna meet us for dinner but you don’t have a choice anymore so show up at seven. I’m gonna leave before that tactless idiot comes back. We’ll talk later.”  
You nod in understanding. She turns to leave but then turns back with a genuine smile.  
“And, well - congrats. He’s a tactless idiot but he does love you or whatever. Cherish each other,”  
You flush, nodding your head. “Yeah…thanks.”  
With that Kotoha leaves quickly. Umemiya returns still shirtless, pouting a little when he notices she’s gone.  
“She left already?”  
“Of course she did. I can’t believe you would invite her for breakfast.”   
Umemiya shrugs. “No point being coy about it. I thought it’d be nice. I was looking for a shirt but I guess I don’t need one now,” He sits besides you on the bed, turning to face with a goofy smile. “Anyways, good morning.”  
“You already said that.”  
“You didn’t say it back,”  
You frown. “G’morning,”  
He smiles suddenly  before grabbing you from underneath the blankets and sheets - pulling your naked body ontop of him as he grins. Sunlight pours through the window as he holds you to his chest, kissing the crown of your head before pressing his cheek into your hair.  
“Mm, yeah. It’s a really good morning after all.”  
“You’re stupid.”  
“And you love me,”  
You fail trying not to smile.  Damn him. You're so happy it hurts. You roll your eyes.
“I guess so.”  
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ellecdc · 7 months
Note
PART 2 PLSSSSSSSSSSS
I need the comfort
ok ok ok ok ok mother's here - I've fixed it for you. Don't say I never did anything for ya 😉
part two of Mistake: poly!wolfstar x fem!reader
CW: angst, hurt and COMFORT read part one here
Remus felt like he’d just been slapped. In fact, he was sure that if he looked in a mirror, he would see a red welt in the shape of your hand across his cheek. 
Lupin?
You haven’t called him that since...well since you started dating. As a matter of fact, he can’t remember the last time you referred to him in any way other than some sickly-sweet pet name that he pretended embarrassed him, but he secretly preened at. 
I’ll see you around.
What the hell did that mean? What just happened?
He felt stuck...perhaps he should go after you? But you told him to go check on Sirius: make sure he’s okay for me, yeah? And he meant what he had said – the three of you would be back to normal in no time. They’d catch up with you tomorrow.
Remus tried to replay every interaction you had tonight. You had asked how their days were...he replied and asked how yours was. Should he have asked you first?
He should have asked you first.
You tried making conversation, but Remus was so hyper focused on Sirius’ mood – afraid that he’d do or say something out of pocket that would hurt your feelings – that each attempt sort of fell flat. Remus had been there before – he’s witnessed Sirius’ tendency to self-sabotage and ruin a good thing once he finally has it, and he didn’t want that to happen again. Not with you.
He knew what Sirius really needed was some quiet; a chance to ponder and lament angrily inside his own head without outside influence.
Maybe they should have cancelled – rescheduled your study date for another time. Clearly his effort to protect you from any negativity was in vain.  
But it was just a bad day, a blip, a one-off. You would all get some good sleep tonight and reconvene tomorrow.
Right?
Maybe he should have followed you.
But by the time he could manage to pry his feet from the floor of the library that he felt cemented to, you were gone. 
He would just have to talk it out with you tomorrow.
Remus entered his dorm to find Peter already asleep on his bed, James finishing the Transfiguration essay that was due tomorrow morning on his own bed, and both Remus and Sirius’ beds empty. 
“Pads around?” Remus asked James quietly as he began to shuck off his uniform. The quiet tone was mostly for courtesy’s sake knowing Peter could sleep through a stampede of hippogriffs.
James peered at Remus from above his glasses before nodding his head towards the bathroom door.
Sure enough, Remus found Sirius leaning against the shower stall with his eyes closed as the water cascaded around his form. 
“You almost done, love?” Remus asked gently. Sirius spooked slightly as he turned to look at Remus; his eyes were red and glossy...he had been crying.
“You didn’t stay with her?”
Remus fought the urge to grimace, to heave, to turn around and run. He opted to gently shake his head. “No, she... said she got most of what she needed to do done.”
Sirius seemed to consider that as he sighed. “Was she terribly upset? I didn’t...I didn’t mean to be an ass. I know James always says I’m quick to take it out on others – I tried really hard not to, honest. I swear it, Rem I-”
Remus began shaking his head as he moved towards Sirius. He could tell by the smell in the bathroom that Sirius had already washed his hair and there were no more suds on his body, so he turned the water off and handed Sirius a towel. 
“You were fine, Sirius. She’s – she’s fine.” He lied.
He lied. He lied to Sirius. About you.
But how could he look Sirius in the eye right now – Sirius who was currently standing naked, soaking wet, nearly hyperventilating, not over his disgusting parents but because he was afraid that he may have upset you – and tell him that between the maybe seven minutes since Sirius had left the library and now, Remus had completely mucked it all up?
The answer was: he couldn’t. He couldn’t look Sirius in the eye and admit that he may have just sabotaged your relationship.
It’s going to be fine. He tried to tell himself. We’ll fix this all tomorrow.
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You felt beyond childish, hiding in your dorm room like some toddler throwing a temper tantrum. But you had decided last night that what you really needed was space. Some breathing room. A chance to see this from a different lens. A different perspective.
And you couldn’t do that when your heart was breaking. And being around Remus and Sirius felt like that right now.
It felt heart breaking. 
And perhaps that was your answer right there. If this was causing you heart ache, why were you doing it to yourself? To them? You didn’t deserve that, and neither did they.
But it wasn’t just this you were worried about. It was more than just this relationship – it was the friendship that preceded it. It was the meshing of you into their circle of friends. You were their friend long before you were ever their girlfriend. You wouldn’t just be losing Remus and Sirius: your boyfriend’s; you’d also be losing Remus and Sirius: your friend’s.
Maybe you should have thought about that before you said yes.
Suddenly, you were a little angry: they had asked you to be their girlfriend – not the other way around! Why would they put you through all of this for, what? For...
Was it really for nothing?
“Are you coming to breakfast?” Shelby asked you quietly from the door. You shifted your head on the pillow to make eye contact with her. “No, I’ve got some things to work on. I think I’ll hang out up here today.”
She seemed to consider you, eyes squinting and mouth pursing before she offered a curt nod. “I’ll bring something back for you then.”
You smiled gratefully at her. At least you knew if you did lose Remus and Sirius, you would still have friends who cared about you. 
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Sirius spent most of his life believing he’d never be worthy of nice things. He was raised by monsters which meant he was a product of monsters; he was basically a monster.
He knew that the Black Darkness was always simmering just below the surface. It was archetypal of Black’s to explode; to lace their words with venom and strike at their victim, always aiming for the jugular. It had been Sirius’ own M.O. for his whole life. He had nearly lost everyone who ever meant anything to him on account of it. He had almost lost Moony.
Which is why it was so important to him that you never end up the latest victim of his Black Darkness. He was so afraid of disappointing you, letting you down, making you feel unloved. He didn’t think he’d ever be able to live with himself if he slipped – if he said something or did something to make you hate him. 
And it wasn’t just you he was worried about hurting; he knew if he hurt you, Remus would likely never forgive him.
Remus may have forgiven Sirius for his Darkness once; he didn’t want to risk trying for a second time. Sirius felt he’d hit his threshold for forgiveness – one more sin and he’d be on his own, surely.
So, he walked away. He tried to do it nicely – to excuse himself politely, assure you he’d be back in no time. 
But he still left.
It was cowardly. 
He needed to talk to you.
Which is why Sirius could be found that morning sitting at the Gryffindor table in the Great Hall, knee bouncing frantically under the table and his body turned towards the entrance – waiting for you to make an appearance.
Except, you never came.
“Wait, Shelby just walked in without her. Where is she?” He asked despondently, turning towards Remus. 
Remus watched as Shelby and a few of your other friends sat at their usual places without you. “Come on.” He said quickly as the two of them stood and made their way over.
“Hey Shelby. Do you know where Y/N is?” Remus asked quietly, hoping his guilt didn’t permeate his tone. Unfortunately, under Shelby’s scrutinizing glance, he was sure he had been found out. 
“She’s in the dorm.” She said flatly, looking between the two boys. 
Sirius exchanged a glance with Remus before continuing. “Erm, do you...do you know why?” 
Shelby furrowed her brows “all she said was she had ‘some things to work on’ and that she’d be in the room today.”
Remus hissed under his breath and pulled Sirius aside.
“Pads, I’m sorry, but I think-”
“What is going on?” Sirius interrupted.
“Last night, I... I think Y/N was upset?”
“Upset? With me?” Sirius asked, shame worming its way through every cell in his body. 
“I don’t know. I... I don’t think so. But she...she said she’d ‘see me around’ and then called me Lupin.” 
All blood drained from Sirius’ face as he considered Remus’ words.
See him around...see him around!? What the hell did that mean? Did you not plan on seeing them again? Oh gods...you never planned on seeing them again.
“Rem...” Sirius breathed out, leaning against a pillar for support.
“I know, I don’t-”
“Good grief, what’s gotten into you two?” James commented as he walked into the Great Hall with Lily, who opted to carry on in her search for Regulus as James took in the state of his two friends.
“Well? What’s got you in such a twist?” He pressed when neither boy offered an explanation.
“It’s Y/N.” Remus admitted.
“She’s leaving us.” Sirius blurted.
“Okay, we don’t know that.” Remus conceded.
Sirius scoffed. “Well, she basically told you to go fuck yourself last night and now she’s avoiding us; what do you call that?”
“She didn’t tell me to go fuck myself!”
James groaned and rolled his eyes before grabbing Remus and Sirius’ shirts and dragging them over to the Slytherin table.
“That’s it. You guys need to talk to Regulus.” James muttered.
“Regulus?!” Sirius sputtered, looking at James incredulously. “I’m not asking my baby brother for relationship advice.”
“You’re not asking for relationship advice. You’re asking for his perspective on his own relationship.”
“Ew! That’s worse! I don’t want to hear about my baby brother’s relationship with my adoptive brother.” 
“Oh for- you are going to listen to Regulus’ perspective on what it’s like being added to a polyamorous relationship last.” James pressed, tone implying no nonsense. 
Sirius (unwillingly) and Remus (placidly) were dragged to the dark side (read: the Slytherin table) to be read their Miranda Rights have their asses handed to them by one Regulus Arcturus Black. 
“Reg, dear. I’m begging, pleading, on my hands and knees: put the poor sods out of their misery.” James said as he bodily sat Remus and Sirius on the bench across from Regulus.
Lily snickered and poked her nose into Regulus’ cheek, causing the youngest Black to blush, though the rest of his face remained stoic as he sized Sirius and Remus up.
“What have the two of you done now?” He drawled. “I can’t help but notice one third – arguably the better third - of your little trio is missing.”
Sirius scoffed, though he didn’t argue – Regulus wasn’t wrong per se; he loved Moony, but you were indeed the best of the bunch.
James cleared his throat pointedly as he shot Remus and Sirius a look.
“Right, er” Remus started awkwardly. “We seem to have, uhm. I mean to say that-”
“Why does Y/N hate us?” Sirius spat, slapping a hand over his mouth immediately afterwards as if those words had fallen from his mouth without his consent.
“Y/N? As in your girlfriend, Y/N?” Regulus asked, moving his eyes between his brother and his brother’s boyfriend.
“Yes, as in our girlfriend.” Remus muttered.
“What did you say to offend her?” James asked unhelpfully.
“Do you think if we knew that, we’d be here right now?” Sirius spat back. 
“No, I don’t think that.” Regulus answered for him. “What I think has probably happened is she’s feeling terribly insecure in your relationship and neither of you have done anything to help her.”
Well that shut Sirius up... Sirius noticed that Remus was pretty quiet too.
“Were...” Sirius asked, grimacing when he looked over at Lily and James knowing this was teetering slightly into the realm of things-he-doesn’t-really-want-to-know-about-his-brother’s-relationship-with-his-best-friend territory. But damnit, Sirius was as desperate man. And desperate times called for desperate measures. “Were you terribly insecure when you started dating...these two?” Sirius sneered the end of his sentence earning him a ‘hey!’ from Lily and a solid whack up the back of the head from James.
“Yes.” Regulus answered simply.
“Why?” Remus asked, looking desperately close to pulling out his notebook to take notes. Scratch that, Sirius watched as James swallowed a teasing remark when Remus actually pulled out a notebook to take notes. 
“It’s hard coming after. There’s a part of your brain that convinces you that you are second best; that you’ve somehow come in second place. If that’s not bad enough, then you begin spending time with two people who already have history, already have a connection, and already have a rhythm that doesn’t leave much room to pull you into the mix. And if it does pull you into the mix, you end up feeling terribly guilty for disrupting that rhythm. It’s all quite difficult.”
Sirius’ mouth hung open at Regulus’ demure tone on what sounded like a really heartbreaking situation. 
“Let me ask you this,” Regulus continued, unawares of Sirius’ inner dialogue (which consisted mostly of panicked ‘oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods oh my gods). “How has your relationship – between the two of you – changed since you added a third?”
Remus and Sirius exchanged a glance before looking back at Regulus. “Uhm...not, really?”
“Not much at all.” Remus admitted more clearly.
“I see...” Regulus said, narrowing his gaze. “And how much time have each of you spent with her individually without the other present?”
Regulus got his answer in the form of awkward silence. 
“How did either of you expect your relationship to work if neither of you were willing to change the nature of yours in order to help it grow?” Regulus spat. 
“Well...” Remus started, but his sentence died when he realized there was nothing to say. 
“But...you stayed? Why?” Sirius asked his brother.
At this, Regulus’s face fell as he gave Sirius a sad smile. “Because of how we were raised, Sirius. I was so excited to be wanted, even for a moment, that I was willing to beg for scraps of whatever I could sink my claws into. She doesn’t strike me as that kind of girl.”
James and Lily looked forlorn as the latter placed her hand on Regulus’ shoulder consolingly. 
“It didn’t hurt to have the walking definition of unconditional love and the smartest, most intuitive witch I know to notice any discontent on my part.” He admitted shyly, earning him a smack of a kiss on the cheek from James.
“Gross. You guys are sickening.” Sirius muttered petulantly.
“So?” Lily interrupted what was close to becoming a squabble between the two Black brothers. “What are you guys going to do?”
Remus sported a determined expression as he looked to Sirius. “We’re going to make it right.”
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Shelby stood by her word and brought your breakfast. She also brought you lunch, and then dinner. But by the following morning, she was tired of playing the role of house elf.
“Alright, are you going to tell me why you’re avoiding Lupin and Black?” She asked plainly, plopping herself down uninvited onto your bed.
“Wha-? I’m ... I’m not avoiding them.” You lied poorly.
“Please; don’t spit on my muffin and call it frosting, Y/N. You’re obviously avoiding them.”
“I...ew?”
She groaned and fell onto her back in defeat. “Please, for all that is holy, tell me why they’ve been following me around like kicked puppies hoping I’ll take them to their master?”
You rolled your eyes and turned back to your book that you held open but had never been reading. “Yeah, I’m sure they’re real upset.” You muttered.
“That’s it.” She spat and plucked your book out of your hands, throwing it over her shoulder unceremoniously. You cringed to think about how Remus would feel seeing a book treated in such a way.
“I was reading that!”
“Don’t lie to me again.” She said, levelling you with a ‘no nonsense’ look. “Spill.”
You sighed deeply, looking toward the window to try and find the words you’d spent the last 24 hours trying to formulate. She never rushed you for your answer, giving you all the time you needed. 
“I feel insignificant.” You admitted finally.
“And?”
You turned to face her, bemusement painting your features. “What do you mean, and?”
“And... have you spoken to them about it?”
You felt a little embarrassed to admit that no, you hadn’t.
“Why not?”
And that simple question seemed to set off all the emotions (mostly frustration) that simmered beneath your surface.
“Because Shelby. Because I don’t want to have to beg for love and affection. I don’t want to have to tell people how to love me; they should just already love me. I don’t want to feel like I’m intruding in someone else’s relationship. I don’t want to have to point out that I’m here and I’m hurting. It’s mortifying. I... I think I’m just done.”
Shelby nodded in understanding before she stood from your bed. “Then you need to finish this today. No more hiding in your room being angry by yourself, and no more letting them sniff around the castle like dejected little runts. Put all three of you out of your misery.” 
It was your turn to nod as you too stood from your bed, ready to face possibly one of the most heartbreaking days of your life.
But Shelby was right; it was time. 
The worst part was that Shelby had been telling the truth; Remus and Sirius did look like kicked puppies. 
The second you had entered the Great Hall you heard a crash of knees against benches and cutlery clashing as Sirius clumsily tried to vacate his seat in record time to make it over to you.
“Y/N!” He called, as if you could have missed the racket he made just prior. 
He looked gaunt – like he hadn’t eaten or slept enough (in the only less than 48 hours) since you’d seen him last. His eyes were red and a little swollen, like he’d been rubbing at them.
You immediately felt sick with guilt; if he really was struggling with things with his family, the last thing you wanted was to add to his stress. But Sirius was looking after himself, and Remus was looking after him too; someone needed to think about you. You had to look after yourself.
Remus didn’t look much better, approaching the two of you much more slowly, hardly making eye contact with you as if you’d lash out at any moment. You had to admit that it annoyed you a little bit.
“Hi Sirius.” You offered, voice grating over the sudden tightness. “Remus.”
Some of the tension seemed to leave Remus’ shoulders as he made an effort to make eye contact with you.
“Can we talk?” He asked timidly. 
You knew what was coming, what was happening, what you yourself had come here planning to do.
But it broke your heart nonetheless.
“Sure.” You whispered, and exited the Great Hall without waiting to see if they were following you. 
You walked into an empty classroom and leaned against one of the walls as Remus and Sirius closed the door behind them. They shared another look and stood opposite of you.
More secret conversations. You thought bitterly. And doesn’t this just paint a lovely picture; them versus you. 
“Y/N. We, uhm...we’ve been talking, and we realized that...that maybe we haven’t gone about this the right way.” Sirius started, looking at Remus continuously as he addressed you. 
We’ve made a terrible mistake. 
“We didn’t take into account the ways in which our relationship would have to change in order to make the three of us work” Remus added.
We didn’t realize how much you’d take away from us, you heard
“We feel like we’ve been unfair to you, and... we’re really sorry.” Sirius concluded, looking like his heart had been ripped out of his rib cage. You supposed that would make sense, considering that’s how you currently felt yourself.
It probably hurt all the same to them – they’d be losing the friendships the three of you had created too; the friendship you had with Remus, the friendship you had with Sirius, and the fun the three of you had all together. But you still loved them, and the last thing you wanted to do was to interfere in their relationship.
“It’s okay, it wasn’t your fault.” You admitted finally. “It was just a mistake.”
Remus’ head cocked to the side like a confused puppy whilst Sirius’ eyebrows furrowed. “Well...I, I’m not sure-” Remus started but was cut off by Sirius.
“Wait, Y/N, what exactly do you think the mistake was?”
You looked between the two of them as you lifted your shoulder. “I... I guess including me?” You stated as a question.
Sirius actually sputtered as Remus stepped towards you, stopping himself seemingly before he made to grab you.
“No! No, Dove. That’s not a mistake!” He insisted.
“Are you kidding? You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to us – no, no. This...wow, okay. Can we start from the beginning, please? Why do you think this was a mistake?” Sirius managed to (barely) get out.
You looked to the ceiling, eyes stinging at the reality of having to voice your hurt. “Because” your voice came out embarrassingly high. “Because it-it felt...better when we were friends. I didn’t feel...in the way. And it felt easier. Just - I didn’t mean to come in between you, and I never...” you cut yourself off, quickly moving into hyperventilating territory. 
“But-”
“It’s not a mistake!” Sirius shouted, cutting Remus off. “This wasn’t a mistake! You weren’t a mistake. I... okay. I didn’t mean to fall in love with you, that’s true. But I don’t consider that a mistake. Not you, never you.”
“It was a surprise; a happy accident.” Remus added hopefully shy.
You felt drunk...dizzy...beyond confused. Weren’t they breaking up with you? Weren’t you supposed to be breaking up with them!?
“I think it was easier when we were friends because we weren’t putting so much pressure on ourselves to get this right.” Sirius explained.
Remus nodded and continued. “Sirius used to get so jealous if I got to hang out with you without him if he was at practice – took us a while to figure out that it was because he wished he was the one hanging out with you. When we started dating, I guess Sirius and I figured we’d just make sure to always hangout with you together so that neither of us felt left out. But we never even thought about how that must’ve been making you feel, dove. I’m so sorry.” 
“Regulus read us our rights.” Sirius admitted abashedly. “He pointed out that the relationship between the three of us will only work if our relationships with each other are strong. And we didn’t make our individual relationships with you a priority – that was our mistake, Y/N. Not you.” 
“Our mistake was believing you would just ‘catch up’ to where we are – which is years in the making – and also expecting you to somehow do that on your own. It was selfish and thoughtless.” Remus stressed
The things they were saying made sense and spoke to your very soul, but you couldn’t shake off this lingering feeling of dread.
“I... I should have said something... about how I was feeling.”
Sirius sighed, but it was Remus who spoke. “I think all of us could have done a better job communicating, that’s true. But we should have been more considerate. We asked you to join us, dove; we should have made that easy for you to do.”
“To think how much grief we’ve caused ourselves, when we could have just solved this all with a conversation.” Sirius mumbled dejectedly. 
“We’re not too late, are we? To solve this?” Remus asked quietly. Sirius’ eyes looked like they were close to popping out of his skull as he stood and made for you, grabbing your hands pleadingly.
“Oh gods, Y/N. You... you were breaking up with us, weren’t you? You thought we were breaking up with you?” His voice sounded very close to a sob.
“Please...please dove I- I don’t know that we deserve it, but please give us a chance to make this right, to do this properly. Give us a chance to love you the way you deserve.” Remus begged, moving to stand in front of you with Sirius, though he controlled his urge to grab your hands. 
You looked between the two boys; the two boys who you’ve been basically in love with for so long – the two boys who have proclaimed to feel the same way about you - and wondered to yourself again:
Have we made a terrible mistake?
Remus’ golden eyes shimmered with compassion and warmth, and Sirius burned fiercely in devotion and promises.  
Had you made a mistake? Falling in love with them?
No.
Perhaps Remus was right. Perhaps this was a happy accident.
“Okay.” You whispered. Remus exhaled the breath he’d been holding while Sirius’ face morphed into a small, hopeful kind of smile – far shyer than you were used to seeing from the boy.
“Okay?” He asked, moving his hands up from your wrists to your shoulders.
“Yeah... I-I don’t want to lose you guys.” You admitted wetly, a tear betraying you as it fell down your cheek. Sirius was quick to catch it with his thumb.
“Never, dove. Not if I can help it.” Remus promised. 
You believed him.  
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heavenbarnes · 7 months
Text
Do not go gentle
Aaron Hotchner x Female Reader
Warnings/Contains: illusions to reader suffering "some" attack earlier, nightmares, reader and hotch are goofy idiots, inappropriate boss/employee relationship, unprotected pinv sex, dirty talk, pulling out, splash the back, mentions of m!masturbation, swearing, blasphemy, hotch has a size kink if you squint.
Word Count: 4.7k
Can you believe it? I've finally posted Hotch smut? I recently picked CM back up again and turns out he's still irresistible. Enjoy this, I did.
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You'd only been back a week, after having two off, and Hotch already wanted to see you in his office.
This normally wasn't a cause for concern, usually you actually liked seeing Hotch in his office. Usually because it was for praise, he'd remark good work you'd done or feed you back something good he'd heard about you from another department.
It was also in that low, calm voice and he'd always have a hint of a smile working it's way to the surface.
But this time it'd be different.
You'd been off for two weeks and everyone was worried it wasn't enough. You'd been, quite literally, through hell and back and nobody wanted to push you too hard to get back into the field.
But you'd reassured Strauss, reassured everyone, that this was the best thing for you. You'd been going stir crazy on your couch in your little apartment, watching everything the TV had on offer.
You needed to get back into things, you needed to get back to helping people.
So you made the slow ascent up to Hotch's office and quietly knocked on the door, feeling it slowly swing open against your hand. He looked up from his desk, eyes connecting with yours and his brow raising slightly.
"You wanted to see me, sir?
He waved you in with his hand, gesturing towards the chair in front of his desk. You took a seat, doing your best to relax back into things and not let him know how nervous this had made you.
“I just wanted to see how you’re doing?”
You smiled, only gently with your gaze picking out flaws in the carpet of Hotch’s office. Nodding slightly, you lifted your head to lock eyes with him.
“Good, actually,” That was honest but you could tell he was a little hesitant to accept it. “I’m glad to be back with everyone and making some difference.”
“And how are you sleeping?” Clear and level headed as ever.
You hesitated, it was only a second but there was no getting past him. You knew you had to be honest now.
“Not well, that's only when I finally get to sleep, and when I do I’m right back there again.”
Hotch’s expression was as hard to read as ever but you could see a hint of sympathy? Sadness? Concern?
“And are you seeing a therapist?”
“I am! She’s great, she says the best way through it is to keep living until I have enough good memories to replace those ones.”
You thought there may have been a hint of a smile on his face but it was gone as quick as you saw it.
“If there is anything I can do to help you, just ask- or call.”
You gave him a smile, an earnest one and you nodded as you spoke. “I will, thank you, Sir.”
That went better than you expected. He didn't want to recall you back to the office for desk work, he was just checking in. You found yourself back to feeling how you normally did when you left his office.
Not really wanting to go.
-
Your apartment was dead quiet, you couldn't even hear the usual hum of your fridge as you left the bathroom. Your home was darker than you were used to, the moonlight struggling to get through the windows.
As you stepped into the kitchen, you felt the unmistakable air of company. Something was telling you that you weren't alone in the darkness. The hairs on the back of your neck stood up as your fingers reached for the light switch.
So close, you were so close when you suddenly felt a strong grasp wrap around your wrist-
Awakening with a scream, you felt your heart fight it's way out of your chest. Your neighbours would probably be leaving another not-so-passive note in your mailbox about this.
Sitting up on the couch, you found your lights still on and your TV still playing some mindless background noise. Another nightmare taking your sleep right from you when you needed it most.
Your cellphone lay on your coffee table in front of you, black screen staring back at you. Mulling it over in your head, you weighed up your options.
On one hand, he quite literally said to call if you needed him. But on the other, he probably just said it as a courtesy, something everyone says.
Either way, before you could really talk yourself out of it- you were dialing Hotch’s number and pressing your phone to your ear.
Zoning out a little at the dial tone, you were quickly snapped back by the sound of his voicemail service, a robotic voice asking you to leave him a message.
It all happened too quickly, your lips were firing off before you could stop yourself.
“Ah- oh God- uh sorry, I’m sorry this is- oh it’s actually me by the way. I’m sorry I called it’s just- I uh had a nightmare. That sounds really lame now that I’m saying this and I really shouldn’t have called- uh I realise now you didn’t pick up because you’ve got a life or you're sleeping- but I'm not and I uh- shit-sorry- Sir, this might be a record for the world’s most pathetic voicemail so maybe take this to a museum- or to a lab to have me tested because what the hell is this- anyway- shit- sorry again and enjoy your night- see you at work tomorrow morning, please- uh please don’t mention this or I will have to go into hiding. Anyways- good night- sorry.”
Hanging up after the message, you threw your phone at the couch and watched it bounce off the cushions and onto the rug. Stuffing your palms into your eyes you let out a pained groan.
“Please throw your phone into the ocean!” You begged, getting up from the couch. “What the actual fuck is wrong with you?”
You had almost forgotten the cringiest voicemail known to man. With how focused you were on perfecting this terrible boxed mac and cheese, your mind was nearly elsewhere.
Just as you’d managed to find a bit of peace, a knock at your front door made you jump out of your skin. Doing your best to calm yourself down, you brought your bowl of macaroni with you to the front door to investigate.
One eye to the peep hole, the minute you saw the person on the other side- your heart dropped. Slowly twisting the lock, you pulled the door back to reveal one Aaron Hotchner.
A very cozy looking Aaron Hotchner.
“Sir-“
“I got your message, you had another nightmare?”
Your words got trapped up in your throat before you could get them out. “Uh yeah.”
“What about? Are you okay”
Clearing your throat, you did your best to focus your gaze on him, remind yourself that you were here- safe in your apartment and not back there.
“Same old, I’m alone in the dark and then suddenly- he’s there.”
There was that expression on Hotch’s face again, this time you were sure it was concern, genuine concern. It was unmistakable.
“I’m sorry this keeps happening to you.”
Just as you were about to brush it off, pretend like it wasn’t driving you crazy, you could see a faint smile appearing as he kept speaking.
“I couldn’t find a museum that'd accept your voicemail but I did find a 24 hour convenience store with ice cream.”
He lifted the bag in his right hand and you could faintly see the tub through the plastic. “Is that cookies? That’s my-“
“Your favourite, yeah it is- do you mind sharing?”
You felt a heat rise in your cheeks as you nodded, quickly realising you’d been having this whole conversation in the hallway.
“Oh yeah, come in- get out of my hallway would you?”
Hotch laughed, quietly, but he still laughed as he walked in. He went straight to the kitchen as you hovered by the couch.
“I can even share my gross looking boxed mac and cheese if you ask nicely.”
That got the rest of the laugh out of him, smiling over his shoulder as he made himself at home in your kitchen. Trying to give yourself something to do, you picked up the TV remote.
“Sorry, the TV’s just been on as background noise but we could watch a movie- only if you want- I don’t even know how long you-“
Thankfully, Hotch cut you off again. “I’d love to watch a movie, as long as it isn’t a cartoon, with dinosaurs or superheroes.”
As he rounded the couch and passed you a bowl of ice cream, you looked up at him with an incredulous expression on your face.
“I literally just rented ‘cartoon dinosaur superheroes’, what the hell?"
Your face broke out in a grin before you could even finish your dumb joke and it had an instant effect on Hotch.
“Yeah well, I preferred the TV series- it went into much more detail.”
Spoon in your mouth, you shot a look at your usually-very-serious boss. You weren’t used to seeing this many smiles- let alone hearing this many jokes from the man.
“Which one was your favourite? The green one?” You pushed the corny little joke a little further.
He glanced back in your direction as he lifted his own spoon to his lips. “I liked the one that put out fires.”
Immediately a grin broke out across your face as you couldn't contain your giggles. You quieted down to a hum as you nodded at his quip. “There totally would be one that put out fires.”
Leaning back into your couch, you picked up your feet to lean them on your coffee table.
“You can put your feet up by the way, I don’t mind.”
As quickly as you said it, Hotch was reaching out a long arm to wave at your legs. “I do, get your feet off the table.”
Looking at him in (slight) faux-shock, you shook your head as he did his best to fight off an impending chuckle.
“Excuse me? This is my house!”
Hotch’s smile only grew. “Hardly a house, it’s a living room with a bed in the back of it.”
Stunned expression painted across your face, a series of unintelligible noises fell past your lips as it was your turn to try not to laugh.
“Alright then, next time I have a trauma induced nightmare then I’ll be coming to your house.”
“Perfect, I’ll have the boxed macaroni cheese and dinosaurs.”
“Great, and I’ll pick apart every stylistic choice you’ve ever made in.”
Hotch finished off another spoonful of ice cream as he shrugged. “I think you’ll find I’m a very skilled interior decorator.”
You cocked your head towards him, eyes narrowed as you played on the bit. “Suuuurely not?”
“I am, and don’t call me Shirley.”
Eyes wide in excitement as he said the words, you couldn’t believe Aaron Hotchner was a certified funny-guy. Your stoic boss, your always knowing what to say, what to do, boss. You quickly reached for the TV remote off the table as the next thought struck you.
“That’s the one, I wonder if they're streaming Airplane!”
It wasn’t like you even lasted the first 20 minutes before you fell asleep. You felt so warm, so cozy, so at peace that you hadn’t even realised you were drifting off until you did.
Hotch didn’t mind either, just happy to see you finally sleeping. His right arm stayed firmly around your side as your cheek and hand laid against his chest, snoring only quietly.
He smiled from above you, tilting his neck just enough to gently rest his chin against the top of your head.
That night you dreamed, for the first time in weeks. You were in your apartment, but the lights were shining and the moon had cast a glow over the room. You could tell you weren’t alone, you felt the company, but you couldn't find it to be scared.
Somebody else was in your apartment and he remembered your favourite ice cream.
-
As you rushed through the door of the conference room, all eyes switched from the round table fell on you. Within an instant, heat was rising up your cheeks.
“Nice of you to join us.” Morgan teased as you slipped into a seat next to Spencer.
“Sorry,” You mumbled, scrambling to grab some of the files in front of you. “Slept in.”
A simple sentence quieted everyone back down as expressions softened across all of them.
“Slept?” JJ asked quietly, full attention on you. “You’re sleeping again?”
A smile cracked at the corner of your lips, nodding gently as you tried to keep your head down. “Yeah, first time in weeks last night.”
Everyone let you off the hook after that, it was all back to work and start filing the reports from the last case. As you all shuffled out to head back to your desks, you heard a voice behind you call your name.
Leaving just you and Hotch in the room, you felt that same heat creep right back up your neck. You stepped over towards him, only bringing yourself to meet his eyes once you were right in front of him.
“Sir, listen, about last night-“
“I’m sorry,” He stopped your babbling before you could even start. “I was out of line.”
Not what you were expecting. This morning had been hazy, Hotch slipping out with a sore neck from sleeping upright. You not even waking as he left.
But this was still-
“I shouldn’t have let myself get as close as I did,” He continued, his tone back to as professional as always. “It won’t happen again.”
“It won’t?”
Hotch couldn’t bare the look on your face. Eyes dropping in confusion and bottom lip daring to wobble. He had to steel himself, he had to walk out of that room before he did something that'd cost his career.
-
He'd completely closed down any chance for the two of you. You'd sort-of-kind-of resigned yourself to the fact it was never going to happen, but having it come crashing down right in front of you hurt more than you'd expected.
You didn't realise that you'd designated a space to him in the centre of your chest until you felt it break. Thinking back on it now, it will completely foolish to think your boss would ever dare to pursue anything with you.
But there was last night.
You'd woken briefly, just the once, and you'd felt his arm around your waist. You'd heard the beat of his heart just under your ear. You could've sworn you'd felt him press his lips against the top of your head.
That was all said and done now. If you'd known it was your only chance, you probably would've held onto it for just a little longer. You thought a hot shower after a long day would help to dissipate your feelings, but you still felt it weighing heavy on your mind.
Shuffling to the kitchen, you decided there was no other choice but to get on with things. What'd your therapist said? Keep moving forward until you have more good memories to replace the other ones?
Besides, you'd gotten on just fine before, without him. There was no reason for this to change anything.
Even after you knew how it felt to fall asleep beside him.
Swinging open the box freezer, you scanned the shelf for something to eat before your eyes fell on the scene of the crime. Last night's ice cream stared back at you with cruel intent.
You decided you'd make a spectacle of it, retrieving it from the freezer to stab a spoon right through the middle of it. The first mouthful stung, the rest was just...ice cream.
Dragging your feet towards the couch, you were nearly close enough to collapse into comfort when a knock at the door sent a fright through you that you'd never get used to. Cautiously, you pressed your eye back to the peep hole and screwed up your face in confusion.
"Sir?" You asked as the door swung open, finding Hotch back in that same place on your doorstep.
"Listen, I'm sorry-"
It was your turn to cut him off. "You really don't have to be. Like you said, it shouldn't have happened."
You'd been hesitant to look him in the eye as you spoke, roaming the spotted ceiling of your apartment hall instead. But as you shifted to catch his eyes, you found him- preocupied.
Hotch's eyes trailed further down, serious expression fixed to his features as his eyes moved to your legs. Only when you went to follow his gaze did you realise.
You'd answered the door fresh out the shower. Skin still a little damp, only in a t-shirt and a thin pair of panties.
You were standing in front of your boss in next to nothing.
And he looked like he wanted to eat you whole (he did).
He managed to clear his throat, to tear his eyes off your body and back to your face. Mustering up the courage, tensing his fists and relaxing his shoulders, he began speaking before he could think.
"I am sorry and I need to say it. I overstepped a boundary here and I put my own feelings for you over everything else and I shouldn't have. I'm sorry if it made you uncomfortable-"
"Hotch-"
"I thought I was fine with keeping this in my head and I never wanted to-"
"Hotch-"
"But I just need to tell you that this wont change anything with-"
"Sir."
Finally, your interjection managed to cut through and he stopped himself. "Hotch, you've never asked me what I actually want."
His features softened a tiny amount, his fists unfurling as he willed himself to relax the rest of himself. "What do you want?"
Taking a long stride towards him, you found yourself nearly chest to chest with the man. Your hand gently ran his tie through your fingers, twisting a little to grasp it for leverage.
"You."
Hotch sucked in a deep breath, his head tilted towards you but his eyes closed. "Please don't say that."
You looked up at him from under your lashes, finding him slowly opening his eyes to watch you move even closer to him.
"Got no reason to lie to you, sir."
You heard his breath catch in his throat as Hotch moved his hands, until they were just and only resting on your hips. You felt the heat radiating off his large palms, closing in until they spanned across your lower back.
"I really shouldn't do this." His voice was a hush, he was still trying to talk himself out.
Not like you were going to let him.
"Then let me."
Closing the space between the two you, your lips pressed against the hard line of his until he opened up for you. You lead things just long enough for him to get comfortable, falling into motion and his tongue pushing forward into your mouth.
His hands tightened, gripping onto your waist like he might lose you if he let you go. Walking you back into your apartment, he blindly kicked his leg back to shut the door. Surging forward, he had the backs of your thighs against the arm of the couch.
Pulling back to take a look at you, his eyes moved to you swollen lips. His thumb came up to brush against your lower lip, gently gripping it between his fingers.
"Pretty, pretty girl," He sighed, you could feel his thigh slotting between your legs. "Such a good girl."
You couldn't stop it, the heady little moan that fell from your mouth at his words. Mixed with the soft feeling of his suit pants pressing to your core, undoubtedly you were leaving some kind of mess on the expensive trousers.
Hotch flexed his thigh, enjoying the feeling of you grinding yourself against his leg like a desperate slut. He watched as you tipped your head back, exposing the column of your throat to him.
Ducking his head, he pressed his lips in a line down your neck and biting gently at the join of your shoulder. "Get up on the couch."
His voice was a rumble in his chest, but there was a command in there that had you moving without being told twice. You went to sit down on it, but Hotch caught you and spun you slightly till you were falling onto the cushions on your knees.
Arms slung over the back of the couch and ass pointed out, you looked back over your shoulders with hazy eyes. Hotch slipped his suit jacket off, throwing it across a chair as he started to roll up his sleeves.
It was so simple, such an easy move but it had an effect on you like nothing else. His strong arms came into view and the veins on his hands flexed as he rolled the fabric. You could feel the damp spot growing on your panties.
This was a different Hotch than the one that stayed over the other night. This was closer to the one that sat behind his desk, stoic and unshakeable. Part of you knew the desperation that was hiding behind the stern look on his face.
You two really had one shot at this. The voice in the back of your head was telling you to enjoy this, it'd never happen again.
Snapping you from your thoughts, you felt two long fingers run up the length of your cunt. Even through the thin fabric of your underwear, you could feel his rough grasp as he gently began to rub at your clit.
Your head lolled forward, a gasp sounding from your chest as you backed your hips towards his touch. As he slid your panties to the side, fingers now running right through your wetness, you could hear the sound of him drawing down his fly.
"I've tried so hard- from the moment I met you-" The words fell from his lips, his knee coming up on the couch to get closer. "I've thought about this moment every night."
Your eyes nearly rolled back in your head, feeling his firm chest press to your back as his words spurred you on. You could picture it in your mind, your boss in the shower, alone in his bed- his hand fisting at his cock as he thought of you.
Pretty you, sweet and kind you. Always the first to do what he says, to look at him with those glassy eyes and say "yes, sir." To him, this was inevitable.
It was only ever a matter of time.
Swiping up the slick from between your legs, you looked back quickly to see him running it across the head of his cock. Your jaw dropped slightly, seeing the size of him as he dragged his hand down the length of it.
"Fuck- that's big."
You didn't even mean to say it out loud. Hotch chuckled as your words, his brows raising slightly as he did.
"Don't worry, sweetheart," He cooed, lining himself up with your entrance. "We'll make it fit."
Your eyes squeezed shut and a drawn out, frankly pornographic, moan fell out. Hotch groaned deep in his chest as he sunk into you, feeling the tight grip of your soaking cunt.
Feeling the press of his lips on your shoulder blade, he made it in fully before he stilled. He was giving you a moment, letting you catch your breath despite the ever-present need to absolutely wreck you.
Reaching back, you franticly tapped at his hip. Quiet pleas of "move, please move" filling the space around you. He was kind, he gave you exactly what you needed as he began to roll his hips into yours.
One of his hands firmly held your hip, the other ran underneath your t-shirt so he could grip at your chest. He cupped one of your breasts, rolling it round in his large palm as he groaned into the crook of your neck.
"God- you feel so good, sweetheart."
You whimpered for him, a pathetic whine sounding from you as you bucked your hips back against him. The hand on your hip began to slip forward, fingers coming around to rub against your clit.
From the speed in which he was fucking into you, the frantic movements of his fingers, the clip of his breath- he was trying hard to hold on. He was doing whatever he could to keep his cool but he was finding it increasingly difficult.
The prettiest girl he'd ever laid his eyes on, the subject of all his inappropriate desires was knelt in front of him. You were somehow tighter than he'd dreamed, somehow sounded sweeter than he'd imagined.
You were calling out his name, chants of "Aaron, fuck, Aaron-" that were no doubt slinking through the thin walls of this apartment and keeping the neighbours up.
He didn't care, he'd get you to tell the whole fucking city if he could. When you felt this good, when you looked this pretty for him? He'd throw his whole career to the fucking wind if it meant he got to do this whenever he wanted.
Maybe- maybe not that far. But Hotch wasn't really in the position to be thinking logically right now. Not when you were turning back over your shoulder to capture his lips, moaning straight down his throat as he continued to sink his hips into you.
"Fuck- you're so deep, sir."
Hotch could've come right then, there was no way he could keep it together when you were saying it like that. He knew good and well that this is why this was never meant to happen.
How was he meant to go back to work and deal with you calling him that, when he's heard just how good it could sound?
He sped up his fingers, messy circles rubbing at your clit as your whole body began to tense. He felt your back arching, pushing back into his chest as you cried out.
"God- I'm gonna'- Aaron- I'm gonna' cum-" Was all you could manage before you clenched around him.
Suddenly, your vice grip released and you were falling limp against the couch with a whimper. Hotch fucked you through it, feeling the shocks wracking your body as he drew out your orgasm as long as he could.
Hotch watched over you, seeing the blissed out expression on your face as you came for him. He looked down to see the way your cunt fluttered around him, a wet mess left on the shaft of his cock.
Taking mental note, he knew that he'd never be able to forget this. His one chance to have you like this, to hold you and feel you gripped around him. The sight of you took over him, his hips stuttering as he gripped hard on your hips.
You opened your eyes just in time to see his head tipped back, strong arms and chest straining against his dress shirt. Hotch's lips parted as a quiet moan of your name ripped from his chest.
Quickly, he slipped himself out as he stroked himself over your ass. Long fingers pulled your panties down around your thighs as hot ropes of cum painted your lower back and behind. Your eyes were growing hazier but you kept them open to watch as he did it.
You were slumped over the back of the couch, high dissipating through your body as you heard him tuck himself back into his trousers. You could hear him moving away, but soon he returned with a warm cloth against your back.
Slipping your panties back into place, he turned you around gently and settled you into his side. Right back where things had started, your sleepy body falling into him.
You both knew it, that this would be the last time. This would never go anywhere else. But there was part of you that'd become content with that, getting used to the strong beat of his heart beside your ear.
Feeling a strong hand brush against your face, this time you were sure of it. His lips pressed softly against the top of your head as you began to drift off asleep.
You knew he'd been gone again when you woke up, you'd both show up to work like all of this hadn't happened. But that was okay, you felt the sleep overtaking you- a feeling that you'd missed.
You slept absolutely soundly, for the second time in weeks.
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themultifanshipper · 1 month
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i will pay GOOD MONEY to read this bro
https://www.tumblr.com/themultifanshipper/756785500347580416/4-way-eiffel-tower
You hadn't been in the paddock for several months, being too busy with your career, and the drivers were starting to get antsy about your return.
But who would be good enough to have a go at you was anybody's guess as the Hungarian Grand Prix weekend got underway.
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Warnings: Kinda paddock bunny vibes, but reader more in control, smut, brief stuff with Lando and Charles, slightly creepy/predatory behaviour (but everything is consensual), hand job, oral, PinV, PinA, anal, like 3 lines of dirty talk, aftercare, eeeeh idk what else
Also, here's part 2!
Max was the first to spot you on Friday morning, you were chatting with some of the formula 3 drivers who were getting ready for their practice session.
He wrapped you in a big hug from behind and lifted you up.
“I know it's been a while but these guys are a bit young for you aren't they?” he said teasingly and you slapped his arm, giggling as he put you down.
“Don’t worry, I already have my hands full with you lot. They'll get their turn if they get into formula 1”
You walked with him on his way towards the redbull hospitality.
“Yeah?” he smirked “Speaking of, what's my prize going to be when I inevitably win on Sunday?”
You laughed at him.
“Given how your car's been performing lately I'm not sure your cockiness is justified”
He gasped and put a hand on his chest in mock offense.
“How dare you doubt my talents?”
“It's not 2023 anymore Max, you can't have me all to yourself. You need to learn to share…” you smiled at him devilishly “And for your information, I won't be giving a prize to the winner anyway, so it's anyone's game”
You winked conspiratorially and sauntered off leaving Max on his own to wonder what on earth you meant by that.
The next person you saw was Lando, that very afternoon. And word had obviously traveled fast.
“A little birdy told me you weren't interested in podium sitters this weekend…” he hooked his arm over your shoulder and pressed a kiss to you cheek in greeting “So what's a man gotta do around here to get you to himself?”
He deepened his voice seductively , but it just served to make you laugh at him, given the number of times you'd heard high pitched whines come out of his mouth during your… celebratory activities.
“Well, hello to you too Lando, how was your week?” you teased and he almost looked guilty for a second, before grinning and hugging you tight.
“I missed you in Miami, so I think you owe me something for my first win, no?” he smirked and walked you over to a secluded corner between two garages.
You rolled your eyes at him, amused by his impatience.
He crowded you against the wall and your hands went to pull him closer by his belt loops, so his hips were flush against yours. He gasped and his hips bucked involuntarily at the action.
You laughed “Come here you horndog” and he crashed his lips to yours in a desperate, messy kiss. His lips came to part yours immediately. He hadn't tasted you for so long it took him seconds to get hard.
Your hand made it inside his pants and he whined and rutted against your hand as his head went to the crook of your neck. He was breathing hard and you could almost feel him trembling in your hold.
This was going to be the quickest handjob of your life.
And he never did manage to ask about Sunday's prize.
A few hours later, in the car park, you were cornered by none other than Charles Leclerc.
“Hello” He murmured in your ear and you jumped at the sudden presence behind you.
You turned around quickly and he pressed you against your car to hug you.
“Hello Charles, how are you?” you said while Charles tucked a strand of hair behind your ear.
“Horny” he answered immediately with a smile.
You laughed and he put his hands either side of you, caging you in.
“I can wait until I win on Sunday of course, but I've been told you have something else in mind”
He raised an eyebrow in question and you sighed.
“I'm not telling you what it is Charles”
He nodded solemnly “In that case…” he swiftly opened the back door of your car and pushed you inside, climbed in and closed it behind him.
“I think you owe me a little something for my Home win in Monaco, don't you think?” He wiggled his eyebrows but you just scoffed. “Come on princess, I want to taste you. It's been so long” he whined.
Your eyebrows shot up in surprise. Well if you weren't going to be doing any work… might as well enjoy a treat for once.
You smirked at him and he grinned, spreading your legs and lifting your dress…
This was going to be a long weekend.
You managed to mostly avoid the drivers’ advances on Saturday, them being pretty busy with prep and qualifying and sticking around the feeder series drivers.
You hadn't even checked the group chat you'd been added to, you assumed it would just be full of questions about Sunday so you steered clear. Your plans would be revealed soon enough.
Sunday morning you arrived bright and early, catching Carlos on your way in and told him to spread the word with the others:
To shake things up a bit, and to celebrate you returning from your lengthy leave of absence, you would be rewarding the top 3 fastest laps of the race, regardless of the placement in the standings.
As you watched the race unfold you were getting more and more excited. The fastest laps were getting passed around like a football, and you were looking forward to potentially getting to have some fresh blood.
And you were right. The fresh blood came in the form of Logan Sargeant. You hadn't been able to spend a night with him yet, him never having gotten a podium.
After the race you sent a message in the group chat:
‘Congratulations to George, Logan and Max! (And Oscar of course 😘)
The three of you are welcome to stop by my hotel room (306 at the hilton, Lando don't you dare) and you need to decide between yourselves about the order etc etc… I'll be waiting ;)’
.
After a quick shower and a quick meal you lay on your bed and checked your messages.
There was just one from George.
‘we'll be there at 7:30’
Oh…
They were all coming together. (pun intended)
Interesting…
You imagined what it would be like. Would they take turns with you? George or Max showing Logan how to handle you. Fucking you into the mattress while he sat in the chair and watched, waiting for his turn.
Or maybe two of them would fill you up while the other ran his hands and mouth all over your body.
Would any of them be into touching each other? You knew Max and George were closer than what they revealed to the public, and that they had hooked up, but would you get to see it?
You imagined what Logan could be like… Was he inexperienced? Did he fuck like a pro?
All these questions were swirling around your mind when a knock at the door interrupted you. A spark of arousal shot through you and you hurried to go and open it.
Max was leaning against the frame, George stood behind him, smirking, and Logan was leaning against the opposite wall, looking cool as a cucumber as his eyes roamed your figure.
“Come on in boys” you said cheerfully, stepping aside to let them through before closing the door and sitting yourself on the bed in front of them.
“So what’s the plan, Max?” you said mischievously “You going to show these guys how it's done? Or is George going to come and claim his prize for Austria?”
George chuckled.
“Actually, we're going to fill you up.”
You frowned at him in question. “Fill me up?”
“You've got 3 holes for a reason, right?”
Your eyes widened and your jaw dropped.
“Fuck, okay…”
You found yourself bent over the bed, Max's mouth on your cunt and his fingers in your ass, stretching you out for him.
George's cock was in your mouth, and your hand was wrapped around Logan, pumping him at a leisurely pace.
Once you had come from Max's expert fingers and mouth, he deemed you ready and you were repositioned to their liking.
You straddled Logan, Max behind you, and George in front of you.
Pulling Logan into a sloppy kiss, you sank down on him slowly. Your heat enveloped him and he moaned into your mouth as you ground your hips down on him.
You felt Max's presence behind you and he pushed you and Logan to lay down. He positioned himself at your entrance and stroked your flesh tenderly.
“You ready, baby?”
You nodded and he wasted no time pushing the tip in.
You moaned, he was pretty big, and Logan was already filling you up nicely.
He pushed in slowly, and with every inch your moans increased in pitch.
Logan could feel you fluttering around him and it was driving him crazy, choosing to distract himself, and you, by sucking marks into your neck.
Once Max was fully inside, George came forward and stroked your cheek.
“You okay, sweetheart?”
You felt so full you didn't quite know how to respond, overwhelmed by the feeling of the two men inside you.
But when they started moving it was a whole different ball park.
The drag of two cocks against your walls was sending shocks of pleasure throughout your body, it was indescribable.
They didn't have the same rhythm so sometimes one pushed in while the other dragged out, but when both of them pushed in together you swore loudly as they nudged every single one of your sweet spots.
George wrapped a hand in your hair and you looked up at him, already fucked out of your mind.
“Mind if I use your mouth, love?”
He asked with a sweet smile.
You grinned at him and stuck your tongue out.
“Good girl”
Being used by 3 of the fittest men on the planet was exhausting, but incredibly rewarding, as you felt your orgasm creep up on you.
You moaned around George and he pulled out to let you breathe.
Max piped up.
“You getting close, baby?”
You whined out a yes before grabbing George's hips and shoving your mouth back on him, the weight of his cock a grounding presence to counter the white hot pleasure coursing through your body.
“Good, because we're close too, we're going to fill you up. Right guys?”
George hummed and stroked your tear stained cheeks. “And you're going to be a good girl and swallow it all, yes?”
You hummed around him, and then Logan spoke for the first time since he'd walked in the room.
“Gonna fill this sweet pussy full of my cum, baby. You like being full of cum? You like being used like a slut by your friends?”
The shock of his voice in your ear sent a shockwave through you and you came on the spot, creaming around Logan and spasming around Max. They both came inside you with a groan after a couple of rough thrusts and stayed there while you came down.
George wasn't far behind and you swallowed all of him as his come filled your mouth.
The aftercare was amazing. George and Logan accompanied you in the shower, one washing your hair while the other scrubbed your body clean of sweat and leaked come.
Max changed the sheets (he called room service for clean ones) and then went in the shower once you were done.
You went to sleep with the three of them huddled around you, their hands wandering over your flesh affectionately.
You always took care of your boys, and they always took care of you.
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jobean12-blog · 3 months
Text
Falling for the Forbidden
Pairing: Marcus Acacius x female!princess reader (Pedro Pascal Gladiator II)
Word Count: 1,574
Summary: Having to hide your love away is difficult and each day it becomes more so...especially when all eyes are on the General.
Author's Note: I swear I will stop...someday. He's too gorgeous and perfect and with the trailer today I nearly died. This is along the lines of my other two stories I've written for him, A Warrior's Heart and Forbidden. You do not need to read them with this one but they are all the same reader. Thank you all so much for enjoying with me! Much love always! ❤️❤️❤️Divider by the lovely @firefly-graphics Thank you Daisy! 😍
PS If anyone has any ideas they want to throw my way, feel free. Thank you 😘 Also, I'm trying to do my research but if I make any historical mistakes, I apologize.
Warnings: there's always soft sweetness under it all, tension, semi-public sex (although at that time I don't think it mattered much haha) but they are sneaking around!
This gif below is NOT MINE it's from @a7estrellas and I've linked the post! Thank you for gifting us with such beautifulness!
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Pedro Pascal Character Masterlist
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The streets of Rome are bustling with life. The market vendors’ loud voices ring out over all else and the smell of various wares fills your nostrils. Every time you walk by a stall the merchant shouts at you to buy something, shaking a fresh juicy fruit or something that catches the dying sun and sparkles like a diamond.
With a polite smile you decline and pull your hood higher up over your head, hoping to just slip through the crowd without notice.
Night dances along the horizon, casting long shadows onto the stone streets and filling the sky with pale pink and orange.
You pass by a fruit stand with baskets of sweet apples, red and shiny. Watching the vendor, you wait for a distraction and grab an apple, quickly stuffing it into the wide arm of your cloak.
Without a glance back you disappear into the darkness between the large stone pillars of a nearby building and press your back tightly to the wall. Your breathing stills and you wait.
Long minutes seem to pass in silence and just as you’re about to give up hope a large and strong hand closes around your wrist and yanks you away from the wall and down into the shadows of an alcove.
“Since when does the princess steal?”
His voice is smooth and deep, purring into your ear while he reaches inside your cloak to retrieve the apple.
You pluck it from his fingers and take a small bite, savoring the sweetness with a matching saccharine smile. A small trickle of juice slips from your mouth and down your chin. His dark eyes watch before he presses his lips to your skin and gently sucks the juice clean.
The apple drops from your hand and rolls further into the darkness, the sun nearly kissing the horizon and hiding you both away in the shadows.
His lips move to your ear and lightly graze the soft spot just below. You shudder at the contact, grabbing onto his biceps when his mouth continues and ghosts along the column of your neck.
“How many nights has it been?” he asks, running his hands under your toga and pressing his fingers between your legs, “since I last had you.”
Your eyes close and you sway into his embrace.
“Too many.”
Your low moan echoes in the emptiness of the hidden spot and he stops his movements.
“Far too many,” he whispers as he removes his hand and grabs your wrists between his large fingers.
He raises your hands above your head and leans down to capture your lips. You struggle weakly, needing to touch him, but he shakes his head and tightens his hold.
“We cannot do this here,” you gasp as he presses his hardness along your stomach.
His lips move down and across your collarbone and his free hand reaches down to slowly pull apart the fabric that covers your skin. He repeats the action until he reveals your bare breasts, hungrily licking his lips before he closes them around your nipple.
Your knees buckle slightly, and you moan out his name.
“Shhh princess,” he whispers against your skin.
“More Marcus. Please.”
He takes his time, teasing, licking, and sucking until your body is aching then he lifts you so you can wrap your legs around his waist.
Your hands immediately delve into his hair, roughly dragging his mouth down to yours as he presses your bodies together more firmly.
The sounds of a raucous and drunken mob grow louder, and you tense against him. You hold your breath and a long a long stretch of time passes before you meet his eyes.
“Marcus. We should not do this.”
You halfheartedly try to push him away, but he holds his ground.
“I cannot wait another moment,” he growls. “I cannot go another night without you.”
Your eyes hold his gaze, but you don’t answer.
“Please,” he murmurs.
Your fingers stroke his cheek, idly tracing the raised skin of a scar that lines his jaw.
“I can never seem to deny you.”
He lets one of your legs fall gently to the ground and his fingers ghost up your thigh. A low hiss escapes his mouth when he feels how wet you are.
“I do not think you ever want to my love,” he whispers into your neck.
With quick and quiet movements, he frees himself, hiking your leg higher around his waist before he pushes in deep.
Your simultaneous moans are lewd, and you hear the crowd growing closer. It makes him push into you harder.
He kisses you hard and fast then covers your mouth with his hand but keeps his eyes locked on yours as he draws himself all the way out. Your strangled sounds make him smile and he rewards you with a deep thrust.
You’re gasping and your fingers search for something to hold on to, every roll of his hips making your muffled moans louder.
His words are soft against your ear when he whispers, “do you feel how perfectly you fit around me? Nothing feels better than this.”
Your only answer is a nod of your head and when he moves harder and faster you silently beg for more.
“I want you to remember what you do to me. Tonight, when you’re alone in your chambers…and the next morning when you ache between your legs.”
His words have you teetering on the edge and now the intoxicated group is just on the other side of the wall. He lifts his hand from your mouth and covers it with his lips, swallowing your strained whimpers as your body tenses and tightens all over.
Your hands fall from his curls and grab his broad shoulders, holding tightly when his final thrusts stutter and slow. He spills his warmth inside you, and he opens his eyes, resting his forehead to yours.
The oblivious voices start to fade as they move away, and you catch your breath as the quiet blankets the night once again.
He reaches for your hand and lifts it between your bodies, delicately kissing your palm before turning it over and brushing his lips across your knuckles.
You inhale softly and whisper his name.
“I should like to see you reach the palace safely.”
Your expression softens even more, and you trace his lips with your fingertips.
“And I should like to have you in my bed every night.”
He squeezes his eyes shut, the gesture laced with pain, and carefully unwinds your leg from his waist and sets you down on unsteady feet.
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The next day passes far too slowly, and your mind is constantly occupied by thoughts of last night. You’re jolted out of your reverie by a familiar voice.
“Princess,” General Acacius greets.
Turning, you catch a glimpse of him standing with a group of gladiators fresh from training. His chest is bare, and you follow the line of strong muscle to where a dark trail of hair disappears under his canvas loincloth.
When your eyes-finally- reach his face, your breath catches in your throat at the look in his eyes.
Then those eyes rake over every inch of you and even though you’re completely covered in your royal attire, you feel completely naked. His expression is as intense as his touch and you wonder, if he continues to stare in such a way, will your skin ignite?
You try to fix your face into something that camouflages that you’re mentally cataloging the way his chest heaves with his quickened breaths, the way his hands fist at his sides and cause the muscles in his forearms to flex and strain, and the way his neck and shoulders are tense as beads of sweat drip down his glistening skin.  
His tongue darts out to trace his lips and he quietly dismisses the others with a growled command. They walk off silently but not before throwing their covetous eyes your way.
The General draws his sword.
“I would not have you look at the princess in such a way…” he says, his voice low and dangerous.
They turn their eyes to him, narrowed and glaring before stomping away with quiet mutterings.
Once they’re out of sight he walks briskly down the hall, waiting in a shadowed recess until you follow.
He grabs you, spinning you out of sight until he has you caged against the cool stone wall. His breath is warm and heavy against your cheek.
“Marcus,” you gasp, fighting to control your own breathing. “Not here. And especially after that…what were you thinking?! It is too dangerous.”
His grip tightens and he bends slightly, kissing your lips softly.
“Then do not tempt me with a look like that again.”
Your hands reach for his shoulders, and you run your fingers across their broad width before tracing his chest and stomach.
“Then you should not tempt me with such…magnificence.”
His scoff is muffled against your skin, and he pulls away to take your face in his hands, softly brushing his thumb across your lips.
“Magnificence…my princess, there is nothing in this world to rival your beauty. You are…stunning.”
His name falls from your parted lips in a whisper, and he kisses you softly, gliding his nose along your cheek until he meets the soft shell of your ear.
“Have you thought of last night?”
You tilt your face and find his lips again. “With every step I take.”
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@hiddles-rose @tripletstephaniescp @blackwidownat2814 @lizette50
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makeitmingi · 3 months
Text
The Babysitter Club [From: Our Shared Melody]
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Genre: Romance, Fluff, Comedy
Pairing: Hongjoong x Reader (y/n)
Characters: Wife!Reader, Daughter (Kim Hwayeon), IdolHusband!Hongjoong, IdolUncle!Ateez
Summary: When your work requires you to travel, Hongjoong insists that he is fine taking care of your daughter on his own, with the help of her chaotic uncles. You were hesitant at first, considering he has never really taken care of your daughter on his own before. But what's the worst that can happen... right?
Word count: 11.4K
[A/N: Sort of Part 2 to 'Our Shared Melody' But it can be read as a stand alone too!]
"Baby?" You spun around in slight surprise, seeing a half asleep Hongjoong shuffling out of your shared bedroom. He finds you standing in front of your open on board bag, gathering what you need last minute for your flight.
"What are you doing up? You should go back to sleep." You scolded softly. But he shook his head, shuffling all the way to you and wrapped his arms around you.
"Did you really think I wouldn't wake up to send you off? You already wouldn't let me send you to the airport." He mumbled.
"Because it's 4 am and you have work tomorrow, Joong." You chuckled, resting your cheek on his shoulder.
"You all packed and ready?" He asked, stroking your head. It took a while for you to answer. Well, you didn't really answer him, you just let out a small, barely audible hum.
"What's wrong?" Hongjoong knew you too well. He knew that something was wrong. It was written all over your face.
"I don't know if I should go... You know, maybe I should just tell my boss I can't make it." You pulled away from the hug to meet his eyes.
"Baby... It's fine, it's okay. Melody and I will be okay. It's only 2 days." He said, hand tucking a loose lock of hair behind your ear, as he spoke to you gently. Hongjoong didn't make fun of you for worrying, he understood you and comforted you, trying his best to soothe your worries and hesitation.
"But I've never been away from her before... Since birth." Your voice wavered slightly. It's not that you didn't trust Hongjoong. He was a great dad and was great with his daughter.
"I didn't expect me to have separation anxiety but it's really killing me." You whimpered.
"Oh, baby. It's okay." Hongjoong brought your head back down to his shoulder as he rubbed your back.
"She'll be the same in 2 days, I promise. I know it's not easy for you to leave." He murmured, planting little kisses along your cheek and your jaw line.
"I know but-"
"This is a great opportunity for you. Your boss is giving you this great responsibility and you'll be able to network there. We both know you've worked hard for such an opportunity." He said.
You usually work from home but your boss had asked you to take a short trip to Hong Kong to represent the company at a conference. This was the major break you needed in your job. But you've been stressing over the thought of leaving your daughter.
Hongjoong was the one that convinced you to go when you were leaning towards turning your boss down. He wanted you to look good for your boss and the company.
"You shouldn't be late. Your car is arriving soon. Go say bye to melody." He encouraged.
"Okay." You nodded, leaving Hongjoong's embrace. He stood in the living room to wait for you and give you some alone time.
Entering your daughter's room, you were careful not to disturb her rest. You leaned over the floor mattress she was sleeping on, pressing your nose to her cheek.
"I love you. I'll see you in 2 days." You whispered, inhaling her familiar, comforting scent before giving her a kiss.
"Aww, baby." Hongjoong pouted, cooing at you when you exited the room with tears in your eyes.
"It'll be okay." He patted your head. He cupped your cheeks, wiping your tears with his thumbs before giving you a kiss.
"I feel like you're teasing me now." You frowned.
"Wouldn't dare to. I'll bring melody to pick you up from the airport when you get back, hmm?" He rubbed your arm. You nodded with a grateful smile, throwing your arms around him to hug him tight. You knew you needed to leave or else you would never leave. While wearing your shoes, you saw Hongjoong wearing his slides.
"You don't have to walk me down. She could wake up and need you." You told Hongjoong but he was stubborn as ever.
"I'm taking care of my first baby. There's no way I'm letting you walk out on your own. It's so dark." He said, ignoring you and wheeling your luggages out to the lift lobby to wait for you.
"Thank you." You slipped your hand into his.
"That's my car." You checked your phone, pointing to the cab that was waiting.
"Good morning." The two of you greeted the driver. Of course, Hongjoong loaded your bags into the boot, not wanting you to do any of the lifting.
"Goodbye, baby. Have a safe flight and don't worry, okay? Call me." He hugged you tightly, giving you a long kiss.
"I will. Thanks, Hongjoong. If you need me, you know I'll come right back." You said.
"I know you will but it'll all be okay, I've got things covered. Good luck during the conference. I love you." He stroked your cheek with a smile of adoration and love. Gosh, Hongjoong really loves you so much and you love him too.
"I love you too, Joong. So much." You smiled. He opened the door to the backseat for you to enter. Once you were in, he closed the door. You blew him a kiss and waved to him as the cab drove off.
"Bye." He waved back, standing there until the cab disappeared down the driveway. After that, he went back up to your daughter.
Your daughter, Hwayeon, is now 18 months. She was everyone's princess, having everyone wrapped around her finger. And until now, Hongjoong still calls her 'melody'.
"Eugh..." When Hongjoong entered the house, he heard Hwayeon's soft whimpers and rushed over immediately.
"Shh, shh. It's okay, melody." He was by her side instantly, patting her tummy to soothe her.
"Appa is here." He laid beside her, propping his head up with his free hand, continuing to comfort her until her whimpers died down and she was lulled back to sleep.
This was a common occurance now with Hwayeon waking up in the middle of the night to look for you and Hongjoong. She was still getting used to sleeping on her own, in her own bed and in her own room. So usually, you or Hongjoong would go comfort her in her bed instead of bringing her to your bed.
"It's okay..." Soon, even the rhythm of the movement from Hongjoong patting her tummy made him fall asleep too.
-
"Hongjoong ah?" Seonghwa called out as he entered the house, looking for the captain, who has not been answering his phone since the morning.
Scratching his head, Seonghwa went to your bedroom, hoping to find the captain there but the bed was empty.
"Bah!" Having heard the soft, familiar voice of his goddaughter, Seonghwa went to her room.
"Oh. My love." Seonghwa saw the little girl sitting up on the mattress. She shakily toddled to Seonghwa and he immediately scooped her up into his arms. That was when Seonghwa found Hongjoong fast asleep in his daughter's bed.
"Yah, Kim Hongjoong. Wake up, you're late." He nudged the sleeping male with his foot. Hongjoong frowned slightly and peeked open an eye, seeing Seonghwa standing over him.
"Oh, Seonghwa... You're here..." Hongjoong yawned, stretching his arms over his head.
"I'm here because you're late. I've been trying to reach you the whole morning!" Seonghwa scolded. Now, that woke Hongjoong up,
"What?! My phone was left in my bedroom, I didn't hear my alarm or the calls come in." He shot up, running his fingers through his hair as he woke himself up.
"Don't curse with my godchild in the room." Seonghwa reminded. Hongjoong slapped a hand over his own mouth, nodding.
"Go get ready. I'll handle Hwayeon." Seonghwa said as he exited the room.
Luckily, Seonghwa knew what to do, having helped you and Hongjoong care for Hwayeon from the moment she was born. Since they've met and Seonghwa carried her for the first time, he's been such a fool for her. He claims that he didn't know the true meaning of love until Hwayeon came into his life.
And although the hanja characters of the 'Hwa' in their names are different, Seonghwa still liked to think of her as 'baby Hwa' like she was really his daughter.
"What a cute bunny." Seonghwa cooed as he dressed Hwayeon up in a fluffy bunny jacket that he bought.
"I knew you would look cute in it." He chuckled, even if she didn't understand him.
One more thing, Seonghwa loves to spoil Hwayeon, something you and Hongjoong discourage but Seonghwa says that Hwayeon was born for him to spoil. It was hard to argue with him.
"Bah!" She babbled, as if repeating after him with a bright smile.
"That's right, cutie" Seonghwa tapped her nose. With her resting on his hip, Seonghwa put together a bag for her.
"Shall we get you some snacks too?" He stood at the fridge, grabbing a yoghurt pouch for her then grabbed random snacks from the cupboard. He also filled a water bottle while Hongjoong grabbed a spare set of Hwayeon's clothes.
"Ah! Wait, a minute. Where is that-" Hongjoong disappeared into his work room, tripping over his own feet and almost falling, making Hwayeon laugh.
"Even your daughter is laughing at you." Seonghwa chuckled with a shake of his head.
"Alright, alright, we're already late. Let's go, melody." Hongjoong said, slipping his shoes on and holding Hwayeon for Seonghwa to wear his shoes. He carried her down to the carpark.
"I'll strap her in." Seonghwa said so Hongjoong could start the car. He climbed in to sit beside Hwayeon.
"So, she left last night?" Seonghwa asked. Hongjoong knew who he was referring to.
"Yeah. Almost didn't want to leave but I managed to convince her. I think she has more separation anxiety than melody. But I don't blame her... I just hope that melody wouldn't just look for her randomly..." Hongjoong sighed as he drove. Even saying your name might remind Hwayeon of you so he avoided it.
"Yeah, let's hope then. And it's a mother thing, Hwayeon was practically a part of her for 9 months." Seonghwa said, completely understanding you.
"Here you go." He handed Hwayeon a yoghurt pouch since they didn't have time to give her breakfast.
"I've got to get to my meeting when I arrive. Can you look after her first? I'll come get her when it's over." Hongjoong asked.
"Of course. Just text me later." Seonghwa replied, too focused on smiling at Hwayeon eat the yoghurt. Anything that she did, Seonghwa would find cute.
"Okay, we're here." Hongjoong parked the car.
"I love you, melody. I'll see you later, appa has to work. Be good for Hwa, alright?" He showered his daughter in kisses.
"Thanks, Hwa! Bye!" Tossing the keys to Seonghwa, Hongjoong ran into the building.
"Your appa is seriously something else." Seonghwa chuckled, shaking his head. He helped Hwayeon out of her car seat and retrieved her baby bag. Slinging it over his shoulders, he locked the car and walked into the lift lobby.
"There we go. Stay close, lovey." Once they were safely inside, Seonghwa put Hwayeon down to let her walk. Not having to worry about the cars.
"Seonghwa hyung! Did you manage to find Hongjo- And who is this adorable bunny?" Yunho grinned, bending down.
"Yu!" Hwayeon giggled and slowly waddled over to Yunho. She gripped onto the material of his sweats to steady herself.
"Hi~" Yunho cooed. When Hwayeon made grabby hands at Yunho, the taller didn't even hesitate, hoisting her up into his arms. The Ateez boys were all fools for the captain's little girl.
"Hongjoong was still asleep when I went to look for him. I think he slept with Hwayeon somewhere in the night so his phone was left in his room." Seonghwa explained.
"Oh yeah, I forgot that captain's on his own for the next few days." Yunho said, remembering the note you sent to the group chat.
"Mhmm, she left last night. So for the next two days, we'll need to help Joong out." Seonghwa nodded.
"Well, of course. We'll always be willing to take care of the little angel." Yunho laughed and tickled Hwayeon, making her giggle and squirm in Yunho's hold. Seonghwa smiled softly, seeing and hearing Hwayeon's laugh. Her happiness was just infectious. The 3 of them took the lift up to the artists' lounge
"Yunho ah, put her down. We should be encouraging her to walk more to build strength." Seonghwa said to the taller male.
"Hyung, please let me have this. Sooner or later, she's going to refuse to be carried by us. At least now, she still wants us so let me savour this moment." Yunho pouted.
Hwayeon had just learnt to walk so you wanted to try to encourage her to walk to build strength in her legs.
"You're unbelieveable." Seonghwa clicked his tongue.
Yunho continued to make funny face at Hwayeon. Even if she didn't understand what was going on, she laughed, holding onto Yunho's cheeks.
"Who else is here?" Seonghwa asked. Yunho shrugged. He balanced Hwayeon in one hand as he pushed open the door to the artists lounge and pantry.
"Is that my princess?" San, who was having his meal, stood up upon seeing Hwayeon. Yunho put Hwayeon down and he patiently waited for Hwayeon to make her way over to San. He picked her up and she wrapped her arms around San's neck.
"I've missed you." San carried her, speaking in a baby voice as he showered her in kisses. That sent her into another round of laughter. Hwayeon really was loved by all her uncles.
"You should continue eating." Yeosang said, bringing Hwayeon to his lap to sit so San could eat.
"She might still be hungry since we rushed out." Seonghwa said, opening a pack of snack puffs for Hwayeon to pick at.
"Can I have 1?" Yeosang asked. Hwayeon grasped one in her hand and placed it in Yeosang's hand. The male cooed and kissed the top of her head before eating.
"Is there anything else we can give her? She seems hungry." San asked.
"We only have snacks until Hongjoong gets her lunch." Seonghwa said. He
"Hongjoong's in a meeting so we have to watch her until he's done." Seonghwa informed, taking a cup of juice for himself from the fridge. He filled Hwayeon's sippy cup with the juice as well before handing it to her. Of course, Hwayeon had a sippy cup in the KQ pantry. She was there so often.
"Hey, everyone. Hey, bun." Mingi entered, having finished his workout session with the trainer in the gym. He went straight to get some cold water from the cooler.
"Mi." Hwayeon made a grabby hand at Mingi. Mingi chuckled, putting the water bottle down to lift Hwayeon up.
"He's sweaty." Yunho crinkled his nose.
I'm not sweaty. I changed my shirt after the workout was done." Mingi scoffed, taking another sip of water then closing the water bottle so he could carry Hwayeon properly.
"Hongjoong hyung's not around?" He asked. Seonghwa shook his head.
"Mam mam." Hwayeon pressed a fruit puff against Mingi's lips to let him eat it. He happily ate it, even if there wasn't much of a taste.
"That's my bun." Mingi chuckled. Their bond was close, Hwayeon having grown up in Hongjoong's studio with Mingi always around. Mingi wasn't a fan of children at first, not knowing how to act around them but Hwayeon was too cute to resist.
"You guys, stop carrying her so much. (y/n) said that Hwayeon is supposed to be walking more to ween her off being carried by us." Seonghwa scolded.
"Soon she won't even want us to carry her already, hyung. Let us have our moment." San said.
"That's what I said." Yunho agreed, poking Hwayeon to tickle her again. She laughed and tried to hide in the crook of Mingi's neck.
"Looks like Hongjoong's meeting is running late. I might need to head to my vocal lesson soon." Seonghwa said, checking his phone to see the text Hongjoong sent.
"Why don't you go ahead, hyung? We got it covered, we'll take her to Joong hyung later." San offered.
"Fine but no stealing her and running off elsewhere. She has to remain in KQ. If Hongjoong finds out and can't find her, he'll kill all of us. I'm serious, guys." Seonghwa threatened them. They have tried to take Hwayeon out before, which ended up in the news with reporters thinking Hwayeon was their kid, not Hongjoong's.
First, it was Seonghwa having Hwayeon's picture as his wallpaper and showing it to ATINY at the airport, gushing over how adorable she was. That made everyone think Hwayeon was his daughter.
Then, Wooyoung calls Hwayeon his 'baby' which made everyone think he had a daughter and was a single parent.
The last instance was Mingi being pictured holding Hwayeon while recording and he posted it on his social media, captioning 'my bun'.
So basically, Hongjoong got fed up and jealous that people thought Hwayeon was his member's daughter and not his so he didn't allow them to bring her out alone.
"Says the one that has been trying to kidnap her since she was born. You even tried to hide her in your jacket once as if (y/n) and Hongjoong hyung wouldn't notice." Yeosang pointed out.
"Hey, I can't help that my goddaughter is the cutest baby ever." Seonghwa shrugged, not even denying it, reaching out to pinch Hwayeon's cheeks. Hwayeon giggled shyly, placing her own hand over Seonghwa's.
"Be good for samchons, okay? Appa should come soon." Seonghwa smiled at her, running his fingers through her hair.
"Papa?" She tilted her head, not knowing what Seonghwa was saying.
"Yeah. I'll see you later, my love." Seonghwa hugged her, showering her in kisses while she clutched onto the material of his hoodie. He put her down and she climbed back onto Mingi's lap.
"Hyung, you're only going for vocal lessons. You're acting like you're not going to see her forever." San laughed.
"Shut it." Seonghwa whipped his head around to glare at San. But he waved to Hwayeon with a sweet smile and left. Hwayeon was not really sure what was going on.
But Hwayeon's bottom lip quivered, sending the remaining boys there into a panic. San picked her up, stroking her back to soothe her. Luckily, Mingi shook his wrists and successfully distracted her with the jingling sound of his bracelets. San set her back down in Mingi's lap as she fiddled with the bracelets around his wrists.
"See? You're okay, bun." Mingi comforted, patting her back as she leaned against his body like he was a chair. After that, San, Yeosang, Yunho and Mingi brought Hwayeon with them to the dance studio.
"There you go." Yunho set her down on the couch, giving her some toys that Seonghwa brought.
As the boys practiced, they all made sure to keep an eye out on Hwayeon, watching her through their practice room mirror.
"Take 5." San panted, laying on the ground and catching his breath. Hwayeon, who was bored of her toys, slipped down from the couch and stood over San, tilting her head in confusion.
"Sannie samchon going night night, bun." Yeosang chuckled while Yunho laughed.
"Wanna dance, princess?" San sat up, encouraging Hwayeon with a soft smile. Mingi played the music and Hwayeon bounced on her knees. The four uncles swooned, clapping and bobbing their heads with encouragement. Yunho had his phone to video the moment.
"Go, bun!" Mingi, the hype man, cheered Hwayeon on. Hwayeon smiled, looking at the three with excitement, jumping up and down. She held onto San's hand, being a little wobbly.
"Little dance prodigy." Yunho stroked her hair.
"Hongjoong hyung's done with his meeting. I'll bring her up to the studios since I'm meeting Eden hyung." Mingi said, slinging his bag over his shoulder.
"Pack her stuff first." Yunho said, putting all her toys and belongings back into the baby bag.
"Aww, bye, princess." San opened his arms and Hwayeon gladly walked into them, he gave her a kiss on the cheek.
"We'll miss you, pretty princess." Yeosang smiled, hugging her too.
"Bye, princess. Yuyu will see you later." Yunho gave Hwayeon a hug too. He tapped his cheek and Hwayeon leaned in to give him a peck, making him grin.
"Let's go, bun." Mingi called. Hwayeon walked in front of Mingi as they headed up to the studio floor. They took their time, Mingi slowly walking beside Hwayeon, not wanting to rush her.
"Look who is at the studio today. Hello~" They ran into Maddox. Maddox was another familiar face to Hwayeon. But she shyly clutched onto Mingi's pant leg. Mingi continued to lead her to Hongjoong's studio. He knocked on the door.
"Ap... pa!" Hwayeon beamed, happy to see her dad come to the door.
"Hello, my melody." Hongjoong bent down to pick her up. Hwayeon immediately wrapped her arms around Hongjoong's neck. No one beats her dad.
"Thanks for looking after her and bringing her up, Mingi ah." Hongjoong said, taking Hwayeon's bag from the taller.
"No problem, hyung. We're always happy to take care of her. She had fun at the dance studio." Mingi grinned.
"Did you?" Hongjoong asked Hwayeon, tickling her.
"She might be hungry though, hyung. We didn't give her lunch but Hwa hyung gave her some snacks. Although it's not enough for a meal." Mingi informed.
"Alright, I'll order her some food before going back to work. Thanks, man. Say bye to Mingi samchon, melody." Hongjoong told Hwayeon. Hearing that another one of her uncles was leaving, she pouted and whined, shaking her head. She tried to reach out to Mingi again but Hongjoong held her away.
"Aww, bun. I'll be back to see you later, alright? I promise." Mingi pouted at her sad face, feeling guilty for leaving her.
"Mi." Hwayeon began to cry. Mingi grew conflicted but Hongjoong nodded at him to just leave.
"I'm sorry. Bye, bun." Mingi tapped her cheek before leaving to his meeting with Eden. Hongjoong closed his studio door with his foot as Hwayeon whined.
"Aww, melody. You just wanted to play with Mingi samchon?" Hongjoong cooed, wiping her tears.
"It's okay, melody. We'll see him later at dinner." He comforted her as he set Hwayeon's bag down in the corner.
"Appa is here, sweet girl." He whispered, kissing her temple. Sitting back down in his chair, He che let Hwayeon's body lean on his as he opened the delivery app.
"Let's get you some food and then a nap. You're probably tired, melody." Hongjoong brushed her hair back.
The food came and Hongjoong tried his best to feed Hwayeon so she wouldn't make a mess in his studio. It was rather successful actually, Hwayeon was too hungry to try and steal the spoon form Hongjoong. But he knew you would kill him if you knew.
You were trying to help Hwayeon develop more independent skills, as recommended by the paediatrician. But Hongjoong liked his little girl depending on him and didn't want her to grow up.
"You eat so well~" Hongjoong praised, wiping her mouth as she ate the last bite.
When she chewed, Hongjoong took the opportunity to take a bite of his food too. He wasn't that hungry since he was focused on her.
"All done!" Hongjoong cheered, making Hwayeon laugh. While watching her, Hongjoong began to clear up the area, throwing the trash into the plastic bag.
"Let's go." He lifted her up to bring her with him to put the trash outside.
"Alright. You can do some doodling." Hongjoong set up Hwayeon's drawing pad and crayons for her to doodle.
He let her draw and play with her toys until he noticed her showing signs of sleepiness. She rubbed her eyes with her hands and yawned as she doodled. Plus, this was the time she usually had her first nap of the day. But like every other child, Hwayeon wasn't a fan of being told it was nap time.
"Melody~" Hongjoong called out softly. Hwayeon lifted her head to look at her father. Hongjoong wheeled his chair over to her and patted his lap.
"Come to appa." He offered, lifting up the stuffed puppy that she has slept with since she was a baby.
"Mmm." She nodded, opening her arms so Hongjoong could lift her up onto his lap. She grasped the puppy, hugging it to her chest.
Another trait Hwayeon, fortunately, inherited from her father is his ability to sleep anywhere. So in a few minutes, Hwayeon was passed out in Hongjoong's hold, her body leaning against his.
"I love you." He kissed the top of her head softly. Hongjoong kept her there for a while, wanting to hold her close, before laying her on the couch.
'HOW'S MY BABY?! - (y/n)'
'Hello to you too, wifey. I'm doing great, thanks for asking. - Joongie'
'Good to know. How's my baby? Is she okay? - (y/n)'
'Yes, baby. Melody is fine, I just put her down for her nap after she had lunch. She's been great, soaking up the love and attention as the princess of KQ. Honestly, I think her samchons are having a greater time than she is. - Joongie'
'That's great to hear. I knew you could do it, Joong. And I was kidding, I miss you too. A lot. - (y/n)'
'I know. I miss you too, baby. But we'll see you in a couple days. I'm gonna work until melody wakes up. All the best for your conference. - Joongie'
"Hu..." Hwayeon fussed, whimpering in her sleep. Hongjoong put his headphones down and rushed to Hwayeon.
"Shh, it's okay, melody." He rubbed her back but she still continued to squirm around.
"Come here, melody." Hongjoong moved her to his lap again, adjusting his chair so he was in a leaned back position. He rubbed her back until she was soothed and back to sleep.
With the sleeping child on him, Hongjoong tried to wheel himself as close to the table so he could reach around Hwayeon to his keyboard.
'Let yourself in later. Melody is sleeping on me. - Hongjoong'
'Need me to take over? - Seonghwa'
'I'm good for now, I'm just working on my own stuff. But when Maddox comes for guide recordings, I'll need you to take her for her second nap if that's okay? I'm worried about the noise - Hongjoong'
Seeing Seonghwa react with a thumbs up emoji, Hongjoong put his phone down and went back to work. He was really grateful Seonghwa could help him, the latter was better with children than Hongjoong was. Seonghwa was proactive but knew Hongjoong too, he knew when to help and when to take a step back.
"Ap...pa..." Luckily Hongjoong only wore his headphones over one ear so he could hear Hwayeon slowly wake up from her nap.
"Good morning, melody. Aww, it's okay." He cooed and picked her up, rubbing her back to soothe her. Hongjoong felt Hwayeon bury her face into his shoulder while his hand cradled her.
"Mama..." Hwayeon whimpered.
"It's alright, melody. It's appa, it's okay." He comforted. Hwayeon frowned a little, recognising her dad.
"See, it's appa?" She wrapped her arms around his neck. He hummed and walked around his studio until she was calm. She yawned, resting her chin on Hongjoong's shoulder.
"Let's go wash up a little, hmm?" Leaving his things, Hongjoong grabbed the baby bag and went to the bathroom.
"Did you sleep well, my melody?" He cooed as he wet one of her baby towels to wipe her face. She grinned at Hongjoong in reply. Hongjoong smiled, kissing the top of her head. Then he changed her diaper and gave her fresh clothes.
"Since Hwayeon didn't want to be let down yet, Hongjoong held her in his arms.
"Is that my baby?!" A loud yell was heard in the hallway, making Hongjoong turn around and Hwayeon lift her head.
"Ah! My baby!" Wooyoung grinned excitedly.
"Wooyoung, she just-" Before Hongjoong could say anything, Wooyoung took Hwayeon into his arms. Wooyoung was another one that children just naturally liked.
"Ooh, you missed Wooyo samchon? I missed you too, my baby." He snuggled her and kissed her cheek.
"She just woke up so she may be fussy." Hongjoong sighed, patting Hwayeon's back as she latched onto Wooyoung.
"Nonsense. My baby is never fussy." Wooyoung scoffed. He followed Hongjoong back into his studio, sitting down on the couch with Hwayeon in his lap. Even if he acted playful, Wooyoung was also very attentive and careful when it came to caring for Hwayeon, as well as her growth and development.
"Mmmmm." Hwayeon whined, tired of Wooyoung's hold on her. Hongjoong smirked proudly and moved Hwayeon onto his lap, rubbing her back to soothe her.
"There, there, melody." He kissed the top of her head. But Hwayeon was restless.
"What's wrong, melody? Hmm?" Hongjoong asked her.
"Baby, shall we go find the other samchons?" Wooyoung sat forward, offering to help Hongjoong with the fussy child. Hwayeon peeked an eye open to look at Wooyoung, seemingly interested.
"Hwa's coming to get her soon before my meeting with Maddox." Hongjoong informed.
"I heard the baby bear was here?" Jongho poked his head in.
"Look who it is, melody. Jongho samchon." Hongjoong patted Hwayeon's back to try and get her excited but Hwayeon was just not in a social mood. She buried her face into her father's chest, as if wanting to hide from everyone.
"It's okay. Did she just wake up?" Jongho asked, stroking Hwayeon's back to comfort her. Hongjoong nodded in confirmation, still trying to settle Hwayeon.
"Alright, alright." Hongjoong stood up, walking around the place. Wooyoung took a video.
"I'm sending this to (y/n)." Wooyoung giggled.
"Send it to our group chat." Jongho leaned in. Hongjoong leaned in to see Wooyoung's phone, realising that there was a group chat with a title he has never heard of.
"Wait, are you guys in a group chat with my wife, without me?" Hongjoong's eyes widened as he paced with Hwayeon.
"Yeah, there are multiple." Wooyoung admitted with a shrug. Jongho punched his shoulder.
"Multiple?!" Hongjoong tried not to yell. He didn't want to scare Hwayeon.
"They're just group chats, captain. There's one with me, Seonghwa hyung and (y/n). Then there's one with all of us and her, without you. That's the most active one." Wooyoung tried to remember off the top of his head. He enjoyed seeing Hongjoong annoyed while Jongho sighed with a shake of his head.
"You're gonna hate this even more. There's one with her, San and Yunho called '(y/n)'s favourites'. The rest of us have been trying to get into that chat forever." Wooyoung smirked.
"That... is true. It is highly coveted to get in. Yeosang hyung was a temporary member before." Jongho conceeded and nodded glumly.
"If Hwayeon wasn't here now..." Hongjoong threatened.
"Yeah, (y/n) said no cursing around baby, hyung." Wooyoung teased. Jongho laughed. Hwayeon was soon soothed, leaning on her father's shoulder but clutching his shirt.
"Is this... normal for her?" Jongho asked with worry, gesturing to Hwayeon's behaviour.
"Separation anxiety starts around 18 months so that's about now. Plus she just woke up not too long ago. It's normal." Hongjoong said.
"Ah, well I've got to go for dance. I'll see you at dinner, baby." Wooyoung kissed Hwayeon's hand. Despite clinging to her father, Hwayeon still managed to shoot Wooyoung a tiny wave, making the male coo and wave back at her.
"Alright, I'm here. Hi, my love." Seonghwa entered the studio. He stopped when he saw her clutching tightly onto Hongjoong's shirt as the captain paced along his studio.
"Separation anxiety." Jongho explained. Seonghwa nodded, you have told him about this before.
"She was like this when Mingi dropped her off too. I think it's hard on her with all the goodbyes." Hongjoong said.
"Aww, my sweet love" Seonghwa pouted and kissed Hwayeon's head. She lifted her head and looked at Seonghwa, who smiled softly at her. She babbled at him, as if greeting him.
"Hi~" He smiled.
"Stay with Hwa for a bit, okay melody? I'll come pick you later." Hongjoong said, starting to peel Hwayeon off him.
"Euh..." Hwayeon began to whine, clutching onto Hongjoong tightly when Seonghwa tried to take Hwayeon. Hongjoong had to gently remove Hwayeon's grip on him, making her burst into tears. Seonghwa held onto her in case she fell from his hold but it broke Hongjoong's heart to see her reach out for him.
"I can't. I'm sorry, melody." Hongjoong took Hwayeon back into his arms but she was inconsolable.
"Sorry, Jong. Why don't you go ahead with Maddox? Tell him I'll reschedule and catch up with him later." Hongjoong frowned slightly, starting to feel stressed.
"Sure, hyung. Don't worry about it." Jongho sent a small smile and left the studio.
"Shh, shh, melody. It's okay, it's okay. My sweet melody." Hongjoong held Hwayeon as she continued to wail.
"I know, I know, I'm sorry." Hongjoong continued to bounce Hwayeon in his arms to soothe her. It made his chest ache at how Hwayeon cried and how he didn't know what to do.
Seonghwa watched Hwayeon cry, feeling his heart break as well. He wanted to help Hongjoong but he didn't want to overstep and make Hongjoong more stress or even risk making Hwayeon more stressed. But also, he didn't really know what to do.
"Appa is here, melody. Papa Hwa is here too, it's okay." Hongjoong said. Seonghwa took that as his cue.
"Oh, my love, see? It's papa Hwa." Seonghwa said, stroking Hwayeon's hair back as it stuck to her forehead from the sweat. He wiped the tears from her face.
"My sweet melody." Hongjoong kissed her temple, feeling her calm down. Her cries reduced to soft sniffles and heavy breathing.
"Here, my love." Seonghwa held the waterbottle out to Hwayeon and she sipped from the straw.
"Good girl." He smiled softly. Even with Hwayeon calmed down, Seonghwa didn't attempt to move Hwayeon to his hold, both her and Hongjoong needed to calm each other down.
"Papa." Hwayeon grasped Seonghwa's hand.
"Take 5." Seonghwa squeezed Hongjoong's shoulder as Hwayeon moved into his hold. As Seonghwa moved out of the studio to let some fresh air in, he walked up and down the hallway with Hwayeon in his arms. From the corner of his eye, he watched Hongjoong bury his head in his hands.
"Love, look at papa." Seonghwa said and Hwayeon lifted her head to look at him. He pressed his hand to Hwayeon's forehead, letting out a sigh of relief. At least she didn't cry herself sick.
"Come on." He brought her to the bathroom to wipe her face and to cool her face down.
"Oh, that's cold! So cold~" Seonghwa playfully pressed the cold towel to her cheeks, making her cackle and squirm.
"Let's go find your appa." He put her down and she walked in front of Seonghwa, somehow knowing the way to her father's studio.
Seonghwa saw the red rimming Hongjoong's eyes, evidence that the captain shed some tears of his own. It would have been stressful for anyone, having your kid wail and cry for nearly 30 minutes.
"Good?" Seonghwa asked.
"Yeah, thanks." Hongjoong took a deep breath. He would always put a smile on for Hwayeon. She toddled forward, holding her father's calves, as he stayed seated on the couch, and burying her face against his knees.
"You were overwhelmed, hmm? It's okay. Me too." Hongjoong smiled softly, carrying Hwayeon onto his lap. Seonghwa went to fix a snack plate for both father and daughter.
"There we go." Seonghwa placed the fork into Hwayeon's hand to train her to feed herself using utensils.
"No, my love. Like this... I swear you're gonna hold your fork like your father." Seonghwa sighed.
"Hey!" Hongjoong exclaimed, offended.
"Your studio is soundproof but I swear I could hear bun crying from next door." Mingi poked his head in. He bent down in front of Hwayeon, giving her a little wave.
"She had a little moment just now. But it's all good." Hongjoong spoke softly. Mingi nodded with a small hum.
"Hey, bun. Told you I'll be back." He tapped her cheek, making her squirm shyly. Hongjoong guided Hwayeon's hand to stab a piece of banana and she clumsily brought it to her mouth. When she successfully put it in her mouth, all 3 adults present cheered and clapped for her.
"My bun is a genius." Mingi praised. Hwayeon smiled, happily soaking in all the attention and praised.
"Papa." Hwayeon grasped one of her vegetable crackers, holding it out to Seonghwa like she did with Mingi earlier. Seonghwa gladly ate the cracker, stroking her head.
"Thank you, love. You're so kind." He grinned.
"What about me, bun?" Mingi pointed to himself. Hwayeon grinned and grabbed one, putting it against Mingi's lips.
"Yah! Stop stealing my daughter's snacks." Hongjoong scolded, using his fingers to push Mingi's forehead until he fell down from his squatting position.
"Hyung, no violence around bun." Mingi wagged his finger.
"Bun!" Hwayeon exclaimed, raising her fork in the air. Seonghwa, Hongjoong and Mingi stared at each other with wide eyes. Even though Hwayeon had said her first words and could say simple words, that was the first time she said 'bun'.
"That's right... You're my bun..." Mingi smiled softly as he felt tears start to form in his eyes. Seonghwa held Hwayeon's plate and Hongjoong put her down on the ground.
"Go give Mingi samchon a hug." Seonghwa whispered. Hwayeon giggled and toddled forward, falling into Mingi's arms.
"Bun!" Hwayeon giggled as Mingi wrapped his long arms around Hwayeon.
"The power melody holds over all of you." Hongjoong shook his head with a laugh and went to sit in his chair.
"Don't say it like you aren't one of us." Seonghwa rolled his eyes. With Hwayeon in a much better mood, Seonghwa and Mingi were able to lead her away for Hongjoong to get some work done.
"Look who is okay and happy." Wooyoung came over, cooing.
"You guys have a little bit of time to play before her second nap." Seonghwa said.
They went back to the artists' lounge to play with Hwayeon. And of course, Yunho made sure that there is a box of Hwayeon's toys kept there. They did simple puzzles and played with blocks. Only when Wooyoung noticed that Hwayeon was showing signs of being tired, he read a story to her.
"Let me set up a place for her to sleep." Seonghwa said and Mingi helped him. Hwayeon comfortably settled in Wooyoung's lap as he read to her.
"We should put her on the couch. It's the softest, even if we put floor mats down." Mingi told Seonghwa.
"Uh, I think that won't be necessary anymore." Wooyoung said softly.
"She's asleep?" Seonghwa asked. Wooyoung leaned down slightly to check and saw Hwayeon fast asleep, clutching onto her stuffed puppy. He hadn't even made it to the middle of the book.
"Just leave her like this, hyung." Wooyoung told Seonghwa. Mingi draped a blanket over her.
"Hey, guys-"
"SHHHH!" Seonghwa, Mingi and Wooyoung scolded San, who was taken aback at the sudden reaction. That was when Wooyoung pointed to the sleeping Hwayeon in his hold.
"Oh, sorry." San apologised. One by one, the other Ateez boys came to join, except Hongjoong, sitting together in the dark and eventually falling asleep. Even though he was asleep, whenever Wooyoung felt Hwayeon stir, he would pat her back to soothe her back to sleep.
So imagine Hongjoong's surprise when he came to look for everyone and found his members fast asleep, but in places around his daughter, as if protecting her.
'Look at them.'
Hongjoong took a picture and sent it to you. Just as he sent it to you, Hwayeon whined and woke up.
"Hi, melody. Did you have a good nap?" Hongjoong went to take her from Wooyoung's hold, hugging her to let her wake up.
"Yah, everyone. Wake up." Hongjoong said to the rest, turning on the lights as he went to the bathroom to change Hwayeon's diaper. He could hear the 7 groan at the bright light.
"Your silly samchons." Hongjoong chuckled. Hwayeon didn't understand but smiled, seeing her father laugh.
"Kim Hwayeon, why are you so cute? Hmm? Why are you so cute?" He cooed in a baby voice and tickled her, making her squeal with laughter. After putting her down, he washed his hands and walked with her back to the lounge. Jongho lifted Hwayeon up, raising her in the air, sending her into another round of laughter.
"Baby bear~" Jongho spun around and held her on his hip.
"You guys were supposed to be watching her. Not sleeping." Hongjoong scoffed, rolling his eyes. He showed them all the photo he took to send you.
"Aww, that's a cute photo though." Yunho giggled. Hongjoong checked his watch.
"It's a little early for dinner..." He thought out loud.
"It's okay, Hongjoong ah. I'm sure we can all eat now. Besides, little one should eat early and sleep early." Seonghwa said. The other boys nodded in agreement.
"What are we eating?" Yeosang asked.
"We should eat baeksuk. Hwayeon will like it and it's better for her." Wooyoung suggested, still mostly paying attention to San playing 'airplane' with Hwayeon.
"Okay, let's go everyone." Hongjoong clapped his hands. However, no one moved, too busy playing with Hwayeon to listen to the captain. Hongjoong let out a tired sigh of despair, marching forward and taking Hwayeon away.
"I'm confiscating melody! Since no one is listening to me." He glared at the boys who jeered back at him.
"Aww, party pooper." Jongho gave a thumbs down. Hongjoong rolled his eyes and ushered everyone downstairs. He put Hwayeon in her car seat.
"I can take one person in the back seat with melody and one person in the passenger seat. The rest, take the van." Hongjoong said.
"Ack! Hyung, no shoving!" Wooyoung yelled as Seonghwa shoved him and ran forward.
"Mingi?" Seonghwa blinked, surprised to see Mingi already in the backseat, playing with Hwayeon when he opened the door. Hwayeon was busy babbling at Mingi.
"You snooze you lose. I was already here the moment Hongjoong hyung put bun in her car seat." Mingi shrugged. Seonghwa sulked and sat in the passenger seat. He obviously wants to sit with his god daughter and 'being in the same car' is not enough fro him. The two watched the other members climb into the van.
"Okay, let's go. Ready, melody?" Hongjoong asked as he sat in the driver's seat and buckled his seatbelt.
"Ouh!" She cheered, raising her fists up, and Mingi copied her in cheering. She gave him a toothy grin, making Mingi melt.
"Why are you so cute, bun? Hmm? Why?" He lifted her stuffed puppy, playfully waving it around. Hwayeon let out a loud laugh and wrapped both arms around her puppy.
"She really loves that thing, wouldn't let (y/n) take it away to be washed..." Hongjoong chuckled.
"It's definitely seen better days." Seonghwa laughed.
"Pup-py. (멍멍이)" Mingi tapped the puppy's head. Hwayeon stopped hugging it, holding it an arm's length away to look at it. Mingi repeated the word again.
"Meo... meo-i." She tried her best to pronounce the word. It wasn't the most accurate but it was good enough for Mingi and the other two in the car. Seonghwa and Mingi clapped for Hwayeon and she clapped too.
"What a smart bun." Mingi cooed.
"You're never going to stop calling her bun, aren't you?" Hongjoong scoffed, shaking his head.
"Until the day I die~" Mingi replied, still playing with Hwayeon, letting her play with his rings. Hongjoong and you didn't only conceive your daughter but you conceived Ateez's daughter.
"Please don't talk about dying in front of her..." Seonghwa sighed.
"Why? Death is normal and inevitable." Mingi blinked in confusion, resulting in Seonghwa facepalming.
"Okay, we're here." Hongjoong pulled into the parking space. But as he was going to come out, Yeosang closed his door, trapping him in the car.
"Come on, baby." Wooyoung stole Hwayeon out of her carseat and brought her to the restaurant. They could hear Hongjoong yelling.
"Let him out, Yeo!" Wooyoung said once they were practically in the shop. Yeosang moved away and Hongjoong came out, yelling at the boys in disbelief. Hwayeon just blinked, tilting her head as she stared at Hongjoong lecturing and scolding the boys for trapping him in the car, stealing her and leaving him behind.
Hwayeon's bottom lip trembled before she burst out crying, burying her face in Wooyoung's chest, shocking all the boys and making Hongjoong stop his scolding.
"No, no, my love. He's not scolding you. It's okay. Come to papa." Seonghwa took Hwayeon into his arms to comfort her.
"Yah, look what you did, hyung!" Yunho frowned. Hongjoong gulped as he faced Hwayeon's angry uncles.
"If you guys didn't play around-"
"You scared bun!" Mingi pouted, seeing Seonghwa bringing Hwayeon outside to comfort her. Also, so her crying doesn't disrupt the other diners in the place.
"Ah, just go get the table." Hongjoong sighed, pinching his nose bridge as he went outside.
"I'm sorry, melody. I wasn't scolding you... Appa was too scary, right? I'm sorry." Hongjoong gently placed a hand on Hwayeon's back. Hongjoong gestured to Seonghwa to move Hwayeon to him. The taller male nodded and lifted Hwayeon off his shoulder.
"There we go. I'm so sorry, melody. I wasn't scolding you. You're a good girl, my sweet melody." Hongjoong put his hand on her head, guiding her to rest her head on his shoulder.
"I'll go in first." Seonghwa said softly. Hongjoong hummed.
"Appa..." She grabbed the material of Hongjoong's shirt in her fist. Hongjong hushed her, swaying from side to side.
"I'm right here, melody." Hongjoong whispered, turning his head to kiss her temple.
After Hwayeon calmed down and Hongjoong was sure she was okay, he brought her into the restaurant. He ignored the guilt that made his chest tighten.
"Baby bear." Jongho smiled as Hongjoong sat down with Hwayeon in his lap. Now, she just wanted to be as close to her father as possible.
"We've ordered for everyone already, hyung. So don't worry about it." Yunho said. Hongjoong nodded, still rubbing Hwayeon's back. San poured him a cup of cold tea. Everyone could see the mental and emotional exhaustion on Hongjoong's face so they all wanted to help him with even the small things.
"Here is the food." The servers brought the bowls of hot chicken soup and rice. Seonghwa portioned out some soup and added half a bowl of rice, tearing some chicken into it.
"I'll put it here to let it cool." He said.
"Thanks, Seonghwa ah. Look melody, yummy food." Hongjoong pointed and Hwayeon sat up.
"Mam mam?" She looked up at her dad, who nodded with a smile, smoothing her hair back. After touching the spoon to his lip to check the temperature, he fed Hwayeon.
"Aigo, my love eats so well." Seonghwa cooed. Wanting more praise from her uncles, Hwayeon took another mouthful.
"You like this, melody?" Hongjoong asked and Hwayeon nodded her head. He smiled and wiped her mouth.
"One spoon for melody. And one spoon for appa." He chuckled, watching how Hwayeon looked up at Hongjoong as he took his bite of food. She giggled, watching her father eat. Hongjoong was unaware of San videoing the moment.
"I'm going to send this to (y/n)." San whispered to Yunho.
"Mmm, send it in our group chat." Yunho leaned over to reply. Hongjoong watched Hwayeon eat her portion and even asked for more, he was happy to see her eat.
"You really love this, hmm? You're eating so well, melody." Hongjoong said, giving her the final spoonful.
After dinner, everyone returned back to the dorms since Hwayeon sleeps early. Seonghwa followed Hongjoong to help him.
"I'll run the water." Seonghwa said and ran to the bathroom to get Hwayeon's bath started. Hongjoong removed Hwayeon's shoes and undressed her.
"Bath time~" Hongjoong sang. Thankfully, Hwayeon was fine with baths since there were toys.
With Hwayeon in a good mood after her bath, Seonghwa took over in dressing her and getting her ready for bed while Hongjoong went to take a shower. Because there was no way he would be able to without someone watching Hwayeon, he would be too paranoid that something happens to her.
"Thanks for all your help today, Seonghwa. And all the boys too, wouldn't have been able to do it myself." Hongjoong said as he emerged, towel drying his hair.
"No need to thank us. We're always more than happy to be around Hwayeon. Besides, we wouldn't have left you all by yourself."
"It's not easy, I wonder how (y/n) does it on her own." Hongjoong fell onto the couch.
"Mothers are heroes, that's how. And (y/n)'s pretty amazing, she's a great mother." Seonghwa said, playing with Hwayeon who was perched in his lap.
"She is..." Hongjoong smiled softly.
"I think I'll work for home tomorrow or even take the day off to stay in. Spend some time with melody." He told his best friend.
"That's a good idea. Maybe we'll drop by for a meal. Or if you just need something, let any of us know." Seonghwa said and moved Hwayeon to stand up so he could stand up to leave. He leaned down to give Hwayeon a kiss on the cheek.
"Goodnight, my love." He smiled and waved to her.
"Thanks again, Seonghwa ah." Hongjoong waved and Seonghwa nodded before leaving to head to his dorm upstairs.
"Alright, time for bed, melody." Hongjoong brought Hwayeon to the room to start to put her to bed. He laid beside her in her bed until she fell asleep.
"You must have been tired, hmm?" He whispered, seeing as to how Hwayeon she fell asleep so fast.
"I love you." He kissed her forehead and left the room. Entering your shared bedroom, the first thing he did was text then call you.
"Hi, Joong." You came into view, leaning against the head board of your hotel bed. Just seeing your face and hearing your voice call his name, Hongjoong felt tears well up in his eyes. He covered his eyes with his hand as he let out a shaky breath. Your eyebrows furrowed as you registered the fact that he was crying.
"Joong? Are you okay? What's wrong? What happened?" Worry was evident in your voice as you sat up in your bed. Hongjoong reached for a tissue to wipe his tears.
"Nothing happened... I just... Gosh, I miss you so much, baby. And I'm sorry for all the time I've taken you for granted." He rambled.
"Taking me for granted? Where is all this coming from, Joong? I've never once felt that you've taken me for granted."
"It's not easy taking care of melody on my own. I don't know how you do it but I now know it's not easy. I feel so guilty, I did so many things wrong today." He shook his head.
"Ah, so that's where this is coming from. Tell me what happened." You spoke patiently and gently.
"I don't even know where to begin..." Hongjoong sighed but began to tell you all the events of today. You listened and didn't interrupt.
Hongjoong was a soft hearted, sensitive soul. He seems fierced and strict as a rapper and the captain of Ateez. But you knew him as Kim Hongjoong, the one who feels guilty easily and always wants to do his best for others.
"Joong, listen to me. I wasn't perfect from the start and probably never will be but that's okay. I'm still learning about this whole parenting thing too." You smiled softly.
"It's okay to make mistakes. I make mistakes too. And trust me, Hwayeon doesn't hate you. She still loves you deeply." You giggled.
"It broke my heart to see her cry so much. And twice in one day." Hongjoong pouted.
"It happens, we're her parents but we're humans too. And she had her wonderful appa there, her godfather and 6 goofy uncles. I'm sure she was fine after that." You said. Hongjoong nodded.
"I miss you, baby. So much." Hongjoong said.
"I miss you too, Joong. The bed feels cold and foreign without you here. And it's almost too quiet without Hwayeon." You shrugged.
"Just one more day and one more sleep, baby. We can do this, hmm?" He gave you a lopsided smile. You nodded, wanting nothing more than to hug Hongjoong. You knew he felt the same, he wanted to shower you in kisses. It was never this hard, being away from each other before Hwayeon was born.
"You're going to suffer when you go on tour." You commented with a chuckle. Hongjoong groaned softly, still hyperaware and listening out for the cries of Hwayeon.
"I'm just going to have to fly you both to every destination with us. Problem solved." He smiled victoriously.
"Well, I have to work but Hwayeon will be more than happy to go see her dad and uncles." You laughed and Hongjoong agreed.
"Won't you be excited to see us too?" He raised his eyebrows.
"Joong, our dating and married life has always consisted, and will probably continue to consist, of me being backstage with you and watching you on stage. If I wasn't excited about it, I wouldn't have went to every performance and concert you have." You pointed out with a chuckle.
"That's why I love you." He grinned.
"I love you too." You said. Reluctantly, you and Hongjoong had to end the call because Hwayeon started fussing and Hongjoong needed to attend to her.
"Shh, shh, melody." He whispered as he lulled her back to sleep. Although you wanted to see Hwayeon, you were worried that your voice and/or your face would remind her of you and make her cry.
"You miss her? I miss her too." Hongjoong spoke to his sleeping child, smiling endearingly at her.
"Thank you for being patient with me." He added as he laid down beside her.
Hongjoong was glad you both decided against an actual bed for Hwayeon. You had those soft mattress pads with two futons put over so you and Hongjoong could sleep with her comfortably.
"Sweet melody." Like the night before, Hongjoong patted Hwayeon's back to keep her asleep, until he too fell asleep, exhausted from the day before. Hwayeon ended up scooting close to her father, pressing herself against his chest.
It was a good decision to stay in because Hwayeon was extra clingy to Hongjoong from the moment they woke up.
"Are you hungry?" Hongjoong asked. He felt Hwayeon nod her head but still hold onto his shirt. Even when he was working, she wanted to sit on his lap.
"Alright, you can walk beside me." He placed her down. Hwayeon held her father's hand.
"Want this?" Hongjoong held the bag of granola bites.
"Eung!" She nodded. He gave her that with some fruits and yoghurt. The father and daughter love yoghurt. Adjusting her on his lap, Hongjoong put the spoon in Hwayeon's hand.
"Eat up, melody." He smiled, watching her try to feed herself. Hongjoong leaned back slightly to text Seonghwa. He updated him on how Hwayeon was and that all the boys shouldn't come over since it may overwhelm her like yesterday. The only person that Hwayeon might be okay would be Seonghwa.
"Papa Hwa's coming over, okay melody?" Hongjoong tucked his daughter's hair behind her ears. Hwayeon actually nodded.
"Papa!" She raised her spoon with a smile. Hongjoong couldn't help but laugh, finding his daughter absolutely adorable. He would gladly be the number 1 fool for her.
"Why are you so cute, Kim Hwayeon?" He playfully pretended to bite her, making her squeal in laughter.
"Appa, noooooo!" She giggled, holding Hongjoong's cheeks.
DING DONG
"Papa?" Hwayeon tilted her head. Holding her in his arms, Hongjoong went to open the door to let Seonghwa in. Thankfully, Hwayeon willing went into Seonghwa's arms.
"Good morning, my love." Seonghwa smiled as he showered her in kisses.
"Hold her. I've needed to use the bathroom for the longest time!" Hongjoong ran to the bathroom. Seonghwa laughed, shaking his head. Holding Hwayeon at his hip, Seonghwa cleared up her empty yoghurt bowl and wiped the table.
"Mmm, yeah." Seonghwa nodded along to whatever Hwayeon was babbling about, which was a mix of short words she knew and made up gibberish.
"She's always so talkative with you, ever since birth." Hongjoong said as he came back.
"Especially when she was 3 months old." Seonghwa chuckled. He sat down at the dining table with Hwayeon in his lap.
"I made Hwayeon some soup and food so we can just order for ourselves." Seonghwa said, nodding over to the food containers he brought down with him.
"Okay. You're so lucky, melody." Hongjoong tapped Hwayeon's nose. They sent the order in for their lunch.
"Since I only have you here for lunch, distract her while I finish up chores." Hongjoong said. He wanted to do the laundry and clear up the house as much as he could so you wouldn't have to do it when you come back, he knew you would be tired from travelling and having to unpack.
"Uh, do you want me to help with the cleaning instead?" Seonghwa raised an eyebrow. Having lived with Hongjoong and sharing a room with him, he knew Hongjoong's cleaning skills...
"I can do it. Believe it or not, I'm good at cleaning now." Hongjoong rolled his eyes. And just as he put a load of laundry in, the food came.
"Lunch time!" Seonghwa lifted Hwayeon up from where she was sitting with her toys.
"Hands." He instructed and helped her wash her hands.
"Be careful, my love." Seonghwa supported her butt as Hwayeon tried to climb into her high chair herself. But she still couldn't really get her leg over the table top so Seonghwa helped her.
"Appa~" Hwayeon whined when she realised she was alone, Seonghwa having left momentarily to get cutlery.
"I'm right here, melody." Hongjoong came to the table, tapping her cheek. He unwrapped all the food, laying it out on the table. Seonghwa put Hwayeon's bib on and placed the plate of what he cooked fro her.
"Alright, melody. Here you go." Hongjoong placed the spoon in her hand. She was content, with her dad on her left and her godfather on her right.
"Mmm, is it yummy, my love?" Seonghwa smiled, watching Hwayeon feed herself.
"Yum!" She cheered.
"Good girl, eat your vegetables, unlike someone..." Seonghwa cleared his throat, raising his eyebrows at Hwayeon's father, who was picking the vegetables out of his rice.
"What?" Hongjoong blinked. Seonghwa shook his head with a soft sigh, turning his attention back to Hwayeon.
"Let me help you, melody." Scraping the last few bites on her plate, Hongjoong fed them to Hwayeon.
"Want more?" Seonghwa asked. Surprisingly, Hwayeon nodded her head. Seonghwa stood up to get her more rice, putting the remaining soup into the bowl. He shredded the last piece of chicken that he cooked for her and mixed it into the rice and soup. Hwayeon kicked her feet happily when she saw more food.
"Your appetite is so much better today, my love." Seonghwa stroked her head.
"I think she's just happy to sit and eat with us now." Hongjoong smiled dreamily at his daughter. Watching Hwayeon eat always made him feel so full.
"To think, it feels like just yesterday I found out our baby was going to be a girl." Hongjoong said fondly.
"Don't start crying." Seonghwa chuckled.
"I already want the cry at the thought of her and boys one day. If I could, she'll never get to be around any boys. You don't need any boys, don't you, melody?" Hongjoong cooed.
"Eung!" Hwayeon nodded, even if she didn't understand what her dad was saying to her. Hongjoong laughed, nodding in approval.
"None of us accept any boys that's less than perfection for our princess." Seonghwa scoffed. He didn't like the idea of his 'one, true love' potentially having a boyfriend and even getting married one day. That'll be his death day.
"See? You're thinking about it." Hongjoong burst out laughing, seeing the deep frown on Seonghwa's face and the defensiveness that was evident in his posture.
"I'll take her and run away before she can start dating." Seonghwa said.
"You're worse than me." Hongjoong scoffed. Hwayeon looked between her father and godfather, waving her spoon happily.
After lunch, Hongjoong cleared up the area and did the dishes while Seonghwa played with Hwayeon. They did some reading, knowing that Hwayeon would have her first nap soon.
"Hwa, you can go if you need to. I'll take over." Hongjoong said from the kitchen.
"I'll wait for her to fall asleep then leave." Seonghwa replied, looking down to see Hwayeon yawning and rubbing her eyes.
When Hwayeon was showing signs of sleepiness, Hongjoong came to cradle her to sleep. She still sleeps best with her father so she fell asleep in his arms quickly. Hongjoong carefully moved to her room to place her down in her bed and Seonghwa gave her a kiss on the head before he left.
However, Hwayeon didn't stay asleep for long, starting to fuss and whine. So, Hongjoong stopped doing his chores and stayed with her, laying beside her.
"Shh, shh..." He rubbed her back to soothe her, knowing she was still tired and needed to nap more.
"Mama..." She whimpered in her sleep. It dawned on Hongjoong that Hwayeon's fussiness could be attributed to her missing you but not realising or understanding it. He looked down at his sleeping child.
"She'll come home to us tomorrow." He whispered, closing his eyes to rest with Hwayeon.
"Joong?" You pushed open the door.
After finishing your part of the conference, you told your boss you wouldn't stay on and wanted to come home. Luckily, your boss understood and let you leave early.
"Baby? Joong?" You left your luggage in the living room and went around looking for your family. There was a possibility that they were out. But when you pushed open Hwayeon's room door, you saw the two laying together in Hwayeon's bed.
"Mama...?" Hwayeon sat up, evidently awake while her father was asleep. You smiled and crept over to pick her up.
"Hi there. Oh, I missed you so much, my baby." You hugged her. You moved out of the room so you wouldn't disturb Hongjoong. Hwayeon buried her face in your chest.
"My good girl." You patted her back.
"Were you a good girl for appa and samchons?" You giggled. Inhaling her scent really comforted you.
"Hold on." You put Hwayeon down just go lay a blanket over Hongjoong's sleeping figure. Right after that, Hwayeon climbed into your arms again.
"Appa brought you to play with papa and samchons, huh?" You spoke to Hwayeon, who listened and babbled back.
When Hongjoong woke up, he noticed Hwayeon wasn't in the room with him. Panic shot through him as he heard rumaging outside. He was worried Hwayeon would hurt herself. Jumping to his feet, he rushed out of the room. But he froze in his tracks. There you were, standing in the kitchen with Hwayeon at your hip.
"Oh! Look who it is." You smiled, talking to Hwayeon.
"Appa!" Hwayeon grinned. You laughed and nodded. Hongjoong rubbed his eyes, he was dreaming, right? Because you were only supposed to be back tomorrow.
"You're not dreaming, Joong. I'm back a day early." You chuckled, knowing exactly what your husband was thinking.
"Here you go, baby." You put Hwayeon in her highway, giving her a small bowl of her crackers.
"Joong, I-" You were interrupted by Hongjoong engulfing you in a big hug. Now, Hongjoong's scent was home. You felt his face pressed against your shoulder.
"I missed you too, Joong." You spoke softly.
That was when you felt the dampness on your shoulder. Hongjoong often makes fun of you, saying you're his baby before Hwayeon is. But there were times when Hongjoong was like your son before Hwayeon was your daughter.
"Please don't ever leave me again." He cried. As much as you wanted to comfort him, you couldn't help but snort.
"Leave you? You were the one telling me to leave!" You exclaimed amidst your laughter.
"I know and I regret it." He sobbed. You knew that Hongjoong was really going through it so you stopped laughing at him and really comforted him.
"You did good, Joong. It's not easy doing it alone, hmm?" You patted his head.
"Not just that... I just missed you... I didn't like coming home and you not being there." He said in between his sobs, making you melt.
"Appa...?" You heard a whimper and looked up to see Hwayeon looking horrified at her father crying.
"Oh, no, no, no. My sweet baby girl. Appa is okay. Don't worry." With Hongjoong still stuck to your waist and refusing to let go, you shuffled over to pick Hwayeon up, balancing her on one arm while to other was still around Hongjoong. You sighed with a shake of your head, comforting your upset child and crying husband.
"It's okay, Hwayeon." You pressed kisses to her head to comfort her since you couldn't use your other hand to soothe her.
"You both... seriously..." You sighed with a shake of your head. Hongjoong lifted his head, cupping your cheeks and pulling you in for a deep kiss.
"Excuse me, your daughter is right here!" You slapped his arm. Hongjoong just hugged you again.
"I'm taking you both with me on tour. No negotiations." Hongjoong declared.
"Joong, no." You sent him a flat look.
"But baby~" He whined. You have been with him long enough to not be swayed by his whining anymore. Once Hwayeon was calm again, you set her down on her high chair to continue eating.
"Think about it. It'll be good for melody too, she can travel and experience things overseas. And she won't forget me." Hongjoong said as he pulled you onto his lap so you could both sit with Hwayeon as she ate. You sat across his lap, legs dangling on his side.
"She won't forget you, drama queen." You scoffed, slinging an arm around his shoulders as he leaned his head against your chest.
"Please~" He whined.
"Stop that, I don't want Hwayeon picking up on your whining." You scolded. Hongjoong pouted at you with a small frown, his last resort was always a tantrum.
"No promises but I'll think about it, okay? Let me speak with her paediatrician and stuff." You gave in.
"Okay!" He smiled, pressing a kiss to your cheek, his arms tightening around your waist.
"So, what did the two of you get up to while I wasn't around?" You asked, smiling at Hwayeon, who smiled back at you, her cheeks puffed slightly from the snacks she was eating.
"The usual, her ruling KQ like the princess she is. Her uncles and godfather spoil her too much." Hongjoong clicked his tongue.
"Coming from you?" You raised an eyebrow.
"She's a mini you, she was literally born for me to spoil. That's different." Hongjoong reasoned, rolling his eyes. You laughed, Hongjoong and Ateez would always be fools for Hwayeon, she'll never know the power she has over the 8. She'll always be Ateez's daughter, princess, baby, love and bun.
"You guys are unbelieveable. I can't believe she has all of you wrapped around her finger and she's not even 2. So much for pirate kings." You snorted in disbelief.
"Oh, please. We knew we were doomed to moment we found out our baby was going to be a girl." Hongjoong stated.
"Well, I'm glad you all had fun and bonded more. She's one lucky girl." You giggled.
"Mhmm. I think melody had fun too. But baby, I wanted to ask you something I learnt about. What's this about a group chat called '(y/n)'s favourites'? And why am I not in it?" Hongjoong finally asked.
"Ah... About that..." All you could do was send him a sheepish smile.
~
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iidrk3i · 3 months
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☆ BUMP IN THE ROAD
hq -- kageyama tobio x gn!reader, iwaizumi hajime x gn!reader, kuroo tetsurou x gn!reader, oikawa tooru x gn!reader
summary: facing difficult challenges with your boyfriend.
warnings: angsty but comfort, slight food mentions (most of them are over dinner srry i was hungry😭), some crying
word count: 1.9k
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✦ KAGEYAMA TOBIO. miscommunication
you knew that volleyball was important to your boyfriend. heck, everyone in school knew. at the start of the season, you were still able to see kageyama in between class periods and lunch break. but as the season went on, you noticed that it was becoming harder to see kageyama at school and outside of school. sometimes he would even skip lunch breaks to practice. it was clear that kageyama was dedicated to training and improving his skills. it was also clear that practicing 24/7 left him with little time for anything else.
you had patiently been waiting for an opportunity to spend quality time with kageyama. earlier today, you texted him and asked if he would like to come over and eat dinner with you. at first, you were left on read. you were worried to say the least. it's been around 2 since you've last spent time with him in person. as you were looking back at the previous messages between you and kageyama, there was a pattern with his texts. they've all been short and quick. around an hour later, you had gotten a notification that he had liked your message. taking that as a sign that he was on his way to your place, you had started to make his favorite meal, and as if on cue, there was a knock on the door.
“hey, tobio,” you greeted him with a soft smile as you opened the door.
“hey,” he mumbled, head tilted down as he swiftly walked in and took his shoes off.
those were the only words exchanged for a while. the both of you were sitting at your kitchen island, the only noise that was heard were the forks scraping against your plates.
“tobio?” you looked up at him. his hair was disheveled, eyebags evident on his face, and his eyes were empty.
"tobio?" you repeated softly, concern evnident in your voice. his demeanor was so different from the lively, determined kageyama you knew.
he glanced up briefly, meeting your gaze for a fleeting moment before his eyes dropped again. "sorry," he murmured, pushing his food around on his plate without much appetite.
you hesitated, unsure of how to approach the growing distance between you. "is everything okay?" you asked gently, reaching out to touch his hand.
he tensed slightly at your touch, pulling his hand away, as if a reflex. "i'm fine," he replied curtly, his tone cold.
the air between you thickened with tension. you knew kageyama well enough to recognize when something was bothering him, but getting him to open up was always a challenge.
"i... i missed you," you admitted quietly, hoping your vulnerability would help him speak his mind.
he sighed heavily, running a hand through his already disheveled hair. "i know," he said finally, his voice hinted with frustration. "i've just been... stressed. there's a lot ofpressure this season, and i feel like i'm letting everyone down if i don't keep improving."
you listened attentively, heart aching for the weight he carried on his shoulders. "you're not letting anyone down, tobio," you assured him gently. "we all see how hard you're working, and we're proud of you. but... i miss you too. i miss us."
he looked up at you then, sadness in his eyes. "i miss us too," he admitted quietly, remorse clear in his tone. "i'm sorry if i've been distant. i just... i want to be the best for the team, for myself."
you nodded understandingly, reaching out to hold his hand again, this time finding no resistance. "you don't have to do it alone, tobio," you murmured, squeezing his hand reassuringly. "we're here for you. i'm here for you."
he squeezed your hand back gratefully, a small, tired smile tugging at his lips. "thank you," he whispered, his voice laced with emotion.
✦ IWAIZUMI HAJIME. lies
iwaizumi had been acting unusually distant and preoccupied for the past few days, which hadn't gone unnoticed by you. despite your attempts to engage him in conversation or spend time together, iwaizumi seemed to be avoiding them, always coming up with excuses about extra training sessions or team meetings.
one evening, after a particularly long and tiring day for both of you, you decided to surprise him with dinner at his place. you had been looking forward to some quality time together, hoping it would give you guys a chance to reconnect. right as you arrived at his doorstep with bags of groceries in hand, you were surprised to find iwaizumi already home, looking visibly surprised and flustered at your unexpected visit.
"hey, haji," you greeted him with a smile, trying to ignore the tension in the air. "i thought i'd make us dinner tonight. i hope that's okay."
iwaizumi hesitated for a moment, glancing nervously towards the kitchen. "actually, um, i have plans with the team tonight," he replied, his voice sounding strained.
your smile faltered slightly, a disappointed expression creeping onto your face. "but you said you were free tonight," you pointed out gently, feeling a wave of hurt.
iwaizumi sighed, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. "yeah, something came up last minute. it's important, i promise," he insisted, avoiding your gaze.
feeling a mix of frustration and confusion, you couldn't help but press further. "hajime, is everything okay? you've been distant lately, and now this..."
he looked torn, clearly struggling with his next words. "it's just... there's been a lot going on with the team. i didn't want to worry you," he finally admitted, his voice tinged with guilt.
your eyebrows furrowed. "so you lied to me?" you asked softly, hurt evident in your tone.
iwaizumi looked torn, realizing the weight of his actions. "i didn't mean to," he started, but you interrupted, your frustration bubbling over.
"you didn't mean to lie, or you didn't mean to hurt me?" you questioned, your voice going against you as it trembled slightly.
iwaizumi sighed heavily, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "i'm sorry," he apologized sincerely, meeting your gaze finally. "i didn't handle this well. i just... i didn't want to burden you with my problems."
you softened slightly, recognizing the sincerity in his apology. "i understand, but i want us to be honest with each other, hajime," you said firmly, your hurt still lingering.
he nodded, reaching out to gently touch your arm. "i know. i'll do better," he promised as he got up from where he was, and engulfed you in a hug.
✦ KUROO TETSUROU. past actions
kuroo had been unusually quiet all evening, a brooding intensity replaced his normally easy going demeanor. as you and your boyfriend sat across from each other at the dinner table, the tension in the air was obvious. you glanced up from your plate, sensing something was wrong.
"is everything okay, tetsu?" you asked tentatively, voice breaking the uneasy silence.
kuroo sighed heavily, setting down his fork with more force than necessary. "no, not really."
you furrowed your brows, concerned. "what’s wrong? you’ve been distant all day."
"that’s the thing," he began, tone tinged with frustration. "it’s not just today. i feel like we keep having the same issues, over and over again."
your heart sank as you realized what kuroo was referring to—the unresolved problems from your past arguments that always seemed to resurface. you knew you couldn't avoid this conversation any longer.
"i thought we had talked through most of those," you replied softly, trying to keep your voice steady.
"yeah, but it feels like we never really resolve anything," kuroo argued, his voice rising slightly. "remember that time we fought about—"
"don’t bring that up again, tetsu," you interrupted, frustration bubbling to the surface. "we settled that, didn't we?"
"but did we really?" kuroo shot back, his frustration now fully unleashed. "it’s like we just patch things up for the moment, and then it all comes back."
the argument escalated, both of you bringing up problems that had long been buried but never fully addressed. voices rose, words became sharper as each accusation hit closer to home. kuroo felt a pang of guilt for bringing up the past, but he couldn't shake the feeling of dissatisfaction that had been gnawing at him.
you fought back tears, feeling the weight of the unresolved issues crushing you. "i thought we were better than this," you choked out, voice trembling.
kuroo’s expression softened momentarily at the sight of your watery eyes, but his frustration lingered. "i do too, but how do we move forward if we can't even talk about this?"
the argument reached it's peak, both of you hurt and exhausted. kuroo sighed heavily once more, running a hand through his hair in frustration. you stared down at your plate, tears silently streaming down your face.
"i.. don't know," you finally whispered, the fight draining out.
kuroo’s heart sank at the defeated tone in your voice. he realized then how much you both needed to find a way to resolve your problems—not just for the sake of the relationship, but for your own peace of mind.
"i’m sorry," kuroo murmured, his voice barely audible. "i just... i want us to be okay."
you looked up, meeting kuroo’s eyes with a mix of sadness and longing.
"me too," you whispered back, a glimmer of hope flickering in your eyes.
✦ OIKAWA TOORU. jealousy and insecurities
oikawa had always been charismatic, charming, and surrounded by admirers—both on and off the court. you had always been supportive of his career and his popularity, but lately, found yourself struggling with a growing sense of insecurity.
one evening after a particularly intense match, you and oikawa were walking back to his apartment when a group of fangirls approached, giggling and asking for autographs. oikawa agreed with his usual friendly smile and playful banter, much to the delight of his fans. you stood slightly behind him, feeling invisible and increasingly uneasy.
as you finally entered oikawa’s apartment, you couldn't contain their feelings any longer. "tooru, can we talk for a moment?"
he turned towards you with a grin, still buzzing from the excitement of the match. "of course, what's on your mind?"
"it’s just..." you hesitated, unsure how to voice your feelings without sounding petty. "i feel like you don't notice how much attention you get from other girls."
oikawa’s expression shifted to confusion, his brows furrowing slightly. "what do you mean?"
you took a deep breath, trying to gather your thoughts. iI mean... those fangirls. they’re always around you, and you're so nice to them, which is great! but sometimes, i feel... i feel like i’m not enough. like i can't compete with all those girls who adore you."
your boyfriend’s eyes widened as he finally understood your feelings. "y/n, i didn't realize you felt like this." he stepped closer, gently taking your face in his hands. "i appreciate my fans, but you... you're the most important person to me. no one compares to you."
you felt a rush of relief hearing oikawa’s reassuring words, but the insecurities still lingered. "i know, but sometimes it's hard not to feel jealous."
oikawa nodded, his expression softening with understanding. "i get it now. i’m sorry if I made you feel that way. i’ll try to be more aware of how my interactions might affect you."
you hugged him gratefully, feeling a weight lift off your shoulders. "thank you, tooru. i needed to hear that."
he pressed a kiss to your forehead. "i’m here for you, always. don’t hesitate to tell me when something's bothering you."
a/n: i was listening to champagne coast while writing these
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