#this was sitting in my drafts for literal days

[suspiciouslackofclowns]

The first time it happens is an accident.

Tommy has obliviously forfeited his turn in favor of staring off into space with his pool cue still in-hand, and Billy purposefully misses the winning shot because he can’t get over how sad his friend looks.

When it comes to matters of the social hierarchy at school, Billy doesn’t typically give two shits. He eats with the popular crowd, attends their parties, and participates in all of the other crap that they do, which includes but is not limited to gossiping, petty vandalism, and public intoxication.

Because what else is a rowdy teen expected to do in the middle of nowhere?

Even so, he’s never really cared about pretending to be friends with people that he isn’t friends with. Carol Perkins included.

People typically know whether Billy likes them or not because he’s very transparent about it. Maybe his teasing comes off as a bit mean at first, but when compared to how he behaves when he truly doesn’t like someone, it’s hardly a guessing game.

So when Tommy’s eyes get glassy as Carol’s name leaves his lips, Billy’s jaw tightens.

He knows that Tommy adores his girlfriend, knows that he’ll bite the head off of anyone who breathes a negative word about her, so he doesn’t say what he’s thinking when Tommy offhandedly mentions their latest argument.

How Carol has, out of nowhere, begun to poke fun at him for things like struggling with dyslexia. How she’s taken to calling him stupid when she gets irritated over petty things.

And, god, Billy has a really hard time keeping his mouth shut when Tommy talks about how he hasn’t finished reading one of his favorite books because of it.

He doesn’t really think about it when he does it. Just ropes Tommy into a hug that gets reciprocated easily, squeezing him tight.

“You’re not stupid, you hear me?”

Tommy sniffles and Billy leans away, hands braced on his shoulders. An embarrassed flush rises on Tommy’s freckled cheeks as his tears threaten to spill over, and Billy can’t really think of anything else to do.

He welds their lips together, muffling the soft hum of surprise that escapes Tommy’s mouth.

They part hastily, both startling back an inch or two, but still linger in each other’s spaces. Billy’s heart spasms in his chest and he clears his throat awkwardly.

“Don’t buy into the bullshit, Hagan. You’re smart,” he says.

For a moment, he worries that he’s going to get kicked out of Tommy’s basement, or worse, kicked out of his life. But Tommy merely nods, a little aloof as he stares with his big brown eyes and makes butterflies swarm in Billy’s stomach.

The second time is less of an accident.

Tommy makes a half-hearted joke about how he swiped some of Heather’s cherry lipgloss and how Billy should totally taste it. So Billy stretches across the seat of Tommy’s single-cab truck and slides their mouths together, getting a lick of that shimmery pink cherry on his tastebuds.

Maybe it’s because they’ve been hotboxing for the last half hour, but he swears that Tommy kisses back. Swears that he can feel the brunet giggling against him gleefully.

And Billy kind of loses count after that.

He finds himself sucking at Tommy’s bottom lip more often than he should. Finds that the press of their mouths together is something familiar in no time at all, and that he craves Tommy’s taste when he doesn’t have it on his tongue.

It’s on one night in particular that Billy brings things to a halt.

He has Tommy in his lap, running his pale hands softly over Billy’s shoulders and nudging him into the sofa cushions like the gentle push and pull of the tide. Licking into Billy’s mouth tenderly with practiced motions.

The blond wants to let him keep going, he truly does, but then Tommy rolls his hips downward and ignites a vicious spark between them. Billy can feel the prick of the guy’s boner. He instinctively pushes Tommy back and earns a puzzled look.

“What’s wrong?”

“As much as I fuckin’ hate your girlfriend, this isn’t right.”

Tommy tsks and swipes a hand through his hair.

“Kissing’s on the board, Bills, I thought we covered that already.”

He squeezes at Billy’s shoulder and shifts in his lap, scooting forward until his thighs are cradling the blond’s lower abdomen. Until his dick is pressing flush against his stomach.

“This is more than kissing,” Billy huffs. He slides Tommy back a few inches, at which point his discomfort must register because Tommy flushes red and lifts himself up, hovering above Billy’s lap on his knees. “I know this has been, well, whatever, but I think we should stop before it turns into something else.”

It’s quiet for a moment. Billy can’t bring himself to look at his friend, looming over him with a guilt-ridden expression. He can’t look because his heart already aches over what he knows is coming next.

“I don’t think it’s whatever,” Tommy admits softly.

And Billy suddenly can’t not look.

“No?” he asks.

“No.” The brunet spreads a small smile and lowers himself down into his former seat, squeezing Billy’s shoulders with a gentle grip. “I think it’s a lot more than that, actually.” Hands find their way to Tommy’s hips again and he adds, “is that okay?”

Something hot like rushing magma fills Billy’s entire chest cavity, and his face splits into a grin. Tommy mirrors the expression wordlessly.

“We gonna call Carol right now?”

“Yep.”

The basement is filled with giggles as they huddle around the phone. Billy’s never been happier to hear Carol Perkin’s voice than when it comes over the line.

And he’s never wanted to kiss Tommy more than he does when he dumps her and claps the phone back onto the receiver.

[pensbridgertons]

PERIOD DRAMA APPRECIATION WEEK 2023

day 1: favorite adaptation + day 2: favorite tv show

jamie and claire + book to screen (in/sp)

[tenderpreyy]

​I’m thinking again about Astarions sexuality and how I've seen some people (to be fair, just a few) talk about it. Mainly, people pointing out his flamboyant behavior, and that us as players are learning more about his past male lovers than female ones and basically all these things for some people pointing to him being gay or at least not interested in women in the same way he is in men. And him only being a romance option regardless of gender, because, well, all companions are and he is therefore just "playersexual", only showing interest in female player characters because he has to, because of the game mechanics.

I think what really rubs me the wrong way about this topic is that it echoes the kind of things bi/pan people (speaking as a bisexual woman myself) find themselves dealing with irl. Whether through some form of internalized biphobia or from the outside through other people's comments. Of course this is about a fictional character so it’s not like he has any feelings that could be hurt. But when i see people tallying up how often he mentions men vs. how often he mentions women it really reminds me of a way of thinking I sometimes fall into in regards to my own sexuality. This is definitely just an internalized response and not something I actually believe when I truly think about it for a second, but I know these patterns of thought very well. Of observing my own behavior. How often do I find which gender attractive? Am I attracted "enough" to women? Do I talk about men's attractiveness too often? Is it the other way around? Am I only saying this woman is attractive to prove something to myself? I literally have a girlfriend and my attitude towards mine or other's sexual orientation is generally a huge big "whatever, I don't care". And I still have a passing thought like that from time to time.

So seeing people talk about a fictional character in this way really sends home how many people (whether consciously or unconsciously) see attraction as some sort of equation, you can solve, where in the end you get a result of either gay or straight.

[stuckinapril]

I’m finally biting the bullet and contacting a therapist today after being ambivalent ab it for so long… this hellsite has its many disadvantages but one thing I can say is it has truly helped me be less scared of pursuing therapy. Silver lining etc etc

[sorikufeels]

https://www.tumblr.com/pondrea/748403783611105280/dont-you-recognise-me

amazing art by pondrea (link above!!!) got me feeling things (the art is so good op!!!!!! 💚) and now i need to yap about this scene lol it’s of the moment zexion disguised himself as sora to riku in com.

(i hope it’s ok to post the link here! let me know if not!)

i’m CONVINCED what zexion said to riku as sora this still haunts riku to this day. it wasn’t even sora who said all that, but i’m sure the fear of how it played out in com actually playing out with the real sora scared riku to death. the fear of this happening led to him walking away from sora first, not even giving him the chance just in case there was a repeat scenario. sure, there was a lot of self hatred and feeling like he didn’t deserve to see sora as well, but the look on riku’s face tells you that this scarred him. this was his biggest fear. he rather fade to darkness than go through this again and isn’t even willing to risk that it could go another way.

anyway, this is just context for what i actually want to talk about lmao

so this is probably one of worst moments for riku right? utterly rejected by his best friend and now that friend was willing to kill him for who he is now. and it wasn’t even real.

but you know who that was real for? sora. in hollow bastion. utterly rejected by riku. his only means of defense taken, basically left to die. and then riku fought him tooth and nail until he lost and sora let him run away.

you know who got closure for their version of this scene? riku. he got it when sora fell to the ground on his knees in the world that never was, when he said he looked everywhere for him and told him he was still riku no matter what. sora told him exactly what he needed to hear to reassure him that sora didn’t think any of things riku feared he did. sora telling him specifically that he was still riku no matter what showed riku that sora stills wants him around. even if he looks like their enemy and even if he did some real awful things, he’s still riku and that’s enough. riku as he is is enough for sora. always has been.

you know who never got anything like that? sora. in fact, the conclusion that sora found to get him through is that he’s not enough. his friends are his power. alone, he has no strength. he only made it through by relying on a complete stranger he managed to befriend. if beast wasn’t there or if he refused to go with sora, would he have survived? he had magic but that would run out eventually. would he have even made it to the room he fights riku in?

i don’t think he thinks he would’ve. in kh3, he says alone, he’s worthless. he’s held that sentiment this entire time. no one told him otherwise. (until riku’s sacrifice but it’s murky about whether sora even remembers that at this point. but even if he does, it wasn’t like the scene in the world that never was. sora was able to dictate exactly what riku needed to hear with no imminent threat and riku was not emotionally compromised like sora was in the keyblade graveyard. riku was able to process everything sora said. that is a far cry to sora screaming in agony over all his friends dying, sora believing wholeheartedly that he's nothing without them, and riku just saying he believes in him. sure, thats what sora needed in that moment to save everyone, but it's not a response to his fears and insecurities established in kh1 like how what sora says to riku is a response to his fears and insecurities established in com.)

at this point, i think it’s obvious that sora knows riku’s changed from kh1 and that he doesn’t believe the same things. sora knows he cares based on his actions and how he saved him too and we know as an audience how dedicated he is to him. but it fucks me up to think that riku got that verbal closure while sora never did. that riku got to start healing from that awful moment but sora really never did.

just,,,, please please please please let them talk about what happened in kh1 i am on my knees begging

extra thoughts: didn’t think of this at first so sorry it’s a little disconnected, but maybe the reason riku is so horrified in that moment in com is because he realizes this is what he put sora through. maybe he made this connection himself and feeling what it was like to be on the other side of it, on sora’s side, horrified him. what’s worse, in riku’s mind, is that riku deserves to be in this position and deserves to be rejected due to his past actions. but sora never deserved it. maybe that contributed to why the self loathing spiral got worse after com.

[skyward-floored]

For IAU scenes... what about Hyrule and Legend finding Sky? Or just anything with Sky

How about... Hyrule healing Sky? :)

Hyrule kneeled down next to Sky, and with Legend’s help, carefully pulled him out from behind the vines. Sky moaned at the jostling, but his eyelids barely flickered, his head lolling. Hyrule swallowed at the sight, but then he rubbed his hands together, and lit up his fingers with a warm, creamy blue.

He placed them on Sky’s chest where there seemed to be the most blood, and closed his eyes, focusing.

Legend kept a hand on his shoulder while he worked, Hyrule’s face creased in concentration. The glow twirled from his fingers and gently danced over Sky’s middle, spreading softly over his chest, and slipping around the rest of him. It felt like hours, but couldn’t have been too long before Hyrule’s glow faded, and he leaned back, shakily wiping some sweat off his brow.

Sky continued to lay still, but his breathing sounded more even, and he looked overall more relaxed.

“Sky?” Legend whispered in a slightly trembly voice.

Their uncle took a deep breath, and opened his eyes again, his vision looking much more clear. His gaze landed on the two of them, and a small smile turned his mouth up.

“Hey you two,” Sky said gently, and Legend and Hyrule dove forward to hug him, the hero’s good wing drawing them close.

[icewindandboringhorror]

boy in silly sitting positions compilation

[sojourner-between-worlds]

A random assortment of autistic!Yusei headcanons on this fine Friday in December.

Yusei got a weighted blanket after the whole Arc Cradle ordeal. Best sleep he's ever had. Crow tried to borrow it once; it did not end well for him, lol.

Eye contact? What's that? Yusei doesn't know her.

He's more prone to shutdowns than meltdowns but they both do happen. (He's definitely accidently hurt himself on more than one occasion but he's gotten better at redirecting those behaviors even on his own as he's gotten older and his reactions less severe.)

He's semi-verbal to begin with so periods of losing speech entirely are a fairly normal occurrence. He's usually fine, and if he still needs to say something, the boys all know sign language anyway. (It's not "real" SL but rather a dialect of Satellite the citizens created to be able to communicate without Sector Security understanding them. Yes, I stole this from @/shitpostingkats, what of it? It lives rent free in my head.) The first time it happens after moving to the City, Yusei doesn't even consider that Aki and the twins don't know their SL and so he signs. Crow laughs at everyone's dumbfounded looks before he both translates for Yusei and then explains. All three are more than eager to learn it. (Rua thinks its "the coolest thing ever" in typical Rua fashion.)

Never quite breaks out of the "subtle stims only" mindset that was forced by necessity of the environment he grew up in. He wasn't about to give Sector Security any reason to single him out, after all, and old habits die really hard. Aki noticed he tended to rub his fingers together a lot, to the point of sometimes accidently scratching himself on the sharper edges of his nails when he's not wearing his gloves and started looking for other options. She bought him a spinner ring for his birthday and while it didn't 100% fix the problem, it did help quite a bit. (Between that and a tangle, he's practically good to go. He never had anything like that growing up, and they bring him great joy to have now.)

For the same reason, he was technically never diagnosed as a kid because Martha didn't want to paint a target on his back with SS. When he moved to the City, he didn't see any point. He was self-employed so any accommodations he could possibly need he could just, ya know, give himself. The first time he ever truly considered it was after he started working for MIDS and was working on his degree. (Even then it took quite a bit of convincing because he wasn't sold on it actually being helpful.)

Feel free to add on!

[aqricus]

“TELL ME DID YOU GET THE NEWS? SHE AIN’T FUCKIN’ WITH YOU NO MORE”

thinking of vanitas watching you form an infatuation with a casual acquaintance of his who isn't even interested in you. vanitas is nothing but a friend, restricted to a platonic relationship while you fuss over your appearance to impress someone else and preen at the slightest praise or second glance from them. all the while, all he can do is clench his jaw and offer up passive-aggressive opinions when you so innocently ask him for opinions on dresses—blue dresses, the same shade as his own irises. are you being unfair? is he being childish?

it's sick, self-sabotaging, the way he proceeds to observe your exchanges despite the bitter envy curdling his stomach and the acrid taste on his tongue. he can't help but wonder if karma is finally serving him the hand he believes he deserves—all the times the stars aligned to dump him into sticky situations forcing him to eavesdrop on or bear witness to conversations that make his chest twinge and his eyes turn downward in shadowed displeasure, lost in thought. it would make sense, wouldn't it?

you actually returning his affections? improbable.

so what if he's entertained the thought of being the one on the receiving end of those pretty, perfume-scented letters he'd always watch you write? so what if he wants your undivided attention focused on him, your eyes fixated on his and trailing after him even after he steps away? so what if he wants to be the reason you so meticulously piece together outfits and doll yourself up? that doesn't matter.

well, it doesn't matter until it does. at first, vanitas doesn't notice it—the way your attention no longer lingers on his acquaintance for long periods of time or how the letters that seemed to be a staple in your routine started to disappear from your day. for someone who spent so much time analyzing and unraveling you, it certainly threw him for a loop when he half-heartedly pointed out his acquaintance's presence in a crowd and you barely spared them a glance before mumbling an "oh, cool."

you lost interest.

they lost your interest.

what a fool.

initially, he doesn't understand how he could've overlooked such a pivotal point in his chances with you. perhaps it was his brain protecting him, keeping him from dissecting his interactions with you so he doesn't sink into that spiraling abyss of overthinking and self-deprecation. but, at that point, all that matters to him is why. why are you suddenly uninterested in them? what changed?

there was a fleeting moment of reluctance before you answered his inquiry, and all he could do was hum. "i knew. i knew they didn't like me, and i dunno . . . i guess i got tired of waiting around for things to change."

you knew their feelings regarding you, and yet you subjected yourself to the heartache and disappointment of unrequited feelings, anyway. sounds familiar.

so, when you finally noticed his toeing of the line between platonic affection and courting and accepted him, it was surreal. it was terrifying, the vulnerability that rose to the surface every time your eyes so lovingly searched his or your hand softly cradled his cheek. at first, a tiny part of him regretted applying himself to several months of flirtatious behavior and maintaining a frequent presence in your life. he didn't like the way he was left completely at your mercy every time you climbed into his lap or told him you loved him, nor did he like the way even the slightest whiff of your fragrance flipped his heart upside down behind his usual teasing facade.

but, once he comes to terms with his newfound relationship with you after what was probably the longest, most challenging mental breakdown he's ever had, vanitas gets greedy. he boasts about you whenever the opportunity arises, sneaks peeks at you through the crack in your door while you get ready for your date, and is always in your face to impishly ask for a kiss or tease you until you avert your eyes and pull that one expression that never fails to cause heat to pool in his stomach. he purrs when you perch on his lap to kiss him, the weight on his thighs soft and warm and just right. being loved is addictive, a high to soothe the lows of the day and an added zest to the messy kisses and mischievous touches that transpire between the two of you.

so, when his acquaintance reappears in your life with a confession of love, vanitas is shocked, and, not to mention, irritated. the "withheld feelings" they speak of are nothing but bullshit—that he knows for a fact. he isn't stupid. the only reason they're seeking you out now is because you're perfectly content with someone else and couldn't care any less about them, which is what vanitas has been waiting for for almost a year. they believe they can just waltz right back into your life and upend your relationship simply because they can?

vanitas knows his presence gets under their skin. after all, the entire time you pursued them, you promised that vanitas was "just a friend.” but now, they're forced to watch as your "friend" grips you by the waist and tracks the softest kisses across your jaw and throat. vanitas was never considered a threat to them—he's positive that's what keeps them up at night. yet, here he is, here you are, and here they are.

their plans to worm their way back into your life are foiled before they can even be put into action, and it's an absolute joy to watch them crumble when they realize it.

vanitas doesn't flinch when all of his cutting, passive-aggressive comments land him with a fist twisted into the collar of his shirt and a fire in his acquaintance's eyes. his eyes are cold, calculating, unforgiving as he listens to their accusations of him being a womanizer; because their words don't matter to him. you know that he's here to stay with you and you alone, something he proves over and over almost every night. they're so worked up vanitas swears he can see a vein thrumming in their temple, and he cracks a haughty, twisted grin.

now that he has you, he’s not going to let anyone take you away.

[chaoticspacefam]

(Miette voice (obvi)) “You abandon Khem Val?? You leave him on the ship like the droid?? Oh oh! Jail for little Sith! Jail for little Sith for ten thousand years!!”

He’s SO dramatic about being asked to wait on the ship, I love him ��🤣🤣

[frobby]

In my heart rin okumura is covered in scars and is chubby

[mattodore]

[thetwilightroadtonightfall]

is now a good time to mention that I have more old predictions for khx’s ending still sitting in my drafts….. 👉👈

[sneakyboymerlin]

Remember when I got into that string of fights a while back because people were exposing their lack of ethics with incredible takes like:

Uther’s persecution of magic was totally justified because magic is dangerous! It corrupts people!

Merlin had no reason to be afraid of Arthur, he was just being irrational! It’s not like thousands of lives were at stake here! He owed Arthur his private information about how Arthur has unwittingly traumatized him!

Simultaneously, there’s no way Arthur could have known that magic isn’t inherently evil because he’d ~never~ seen magic used for good (despite events going as far back as 1x04 or even 1x03)

Merlin withholding personal information from the people who were a constant threat to his life for being “born wrong” was morally repugnant! He should’ve exposed himself with the information his oppressors would kill him for, to give them a chance to change their minds! There’s totally no other way they could form different opinions!

Arthur deserved to know about Merlin’s magic, despite his condemnation of all things magic which threatened Merlin’s safety, because Arthur was kind or merciful in so many things except, noticeably, magic! Merlin should’ve trusted him!

Uther and Arthur are the REAL victims of the people who they oppress, so they have no choice but to slaughter thousands, children included!

Those were certainly times.

I remember saying at one point that if I knew someone was homophobic, I simply wouldn’t come out to them as gay, because they haven’t earned my trust in that regard. Anything they’ve done for me, they did while believing me to be straight. They likely wouldn’t treat me the same if they knew. Likewise, if a gay person had abused them at one point, it still wouldn’t give them the right to stereotype all gay people as abusive, or to support anti-gay campaigns. Homophobia has no justification. It’s just bigotry.

I said this multiple times, but every response was: “Well that’s different! Magic is actually dangerous!”

Here is what I said (paraphrased):

“If the potential dangers of magic were really the problem—and not just Uther’s excuse to justify banning it—then Uther could always just ban certain spells instead of committing genocide. Same with Arthur, really. But these characters wrongly believe that magic is inherently corrupt, because that worldview is easier to swallow than the hard truth.

“Criminalizing magic is like blaming massacres on all tools when they’re only performed with particular weapons: should whisks be considered a danger because some people murder with military grade assault rifles? Clearly, banning whisks doesn’t solve the problem. Likewise, when a sorcerer gets executed for using magic in the kitchen, Uther has effectively equated this harmless act to malicious crimes like murder. Was there ever a problem with magic itself, or does Uther perhaps have ulterior motives for banning it?

“If murder is already illegal, then banning murder by means of magic is unnecessary—all forms of murder, magical or not, are illegal by default. Making magic illegal does not prevent crimes that are already illegal; it only criminalizes innocent magic use, which means that people are prosecuted and found guilty for anything from using magic for chores to simply being loosely associated with a magical person.

“Uther’s laws helped no one but himself, because they weren’t designed to serve any other purpose. Nothing was accomplished, except that dehumanizing crimes such as trafficking and murder became legal as long as the victim had magic.”

To this, I was told that I “wasn’t understanding.”

What wasn’t I understanding? That people genuinely believe the ban on magic was okay? That they don’t have the slightest inkling of how oppression works, or how their justifications for hypothetical scenarios show their gullibility to real world bigotry? Why even bother defending a fictional character’s fictional genocide?

The ban on magic is ultimately a metaphor for the persecution of a marginalized religion (it’s literally called “The Old Religion”). To support Uther’s (and Arthur’s) claims that magic is inherently dangerous—despite the overwhelming evidence to the contrary—is worrying at the least, considering the real life ramifications of fiction.

If you’re forsaking your morals to defend the inexcusable actions of a fictional character or two, then you value your entertainment more than real human lives. Likewise, you shouldn’t excuse any form of bigotry just because you like the person who is perpetuating it. If you can’t even stand by your supposed morals when it comes to fictional characters, there is no chance you will stand by them with real people. Most Arthur stans like him because they believe in his capacity for change, but this acknowledges that he is wrong and needs to change. The less like Uther he is, the better! My Gwaine-stanning is also reliant on him changing his views and accepting responsibility for them. We don’t get to make excuses for their unfair biases!

Merlin and other magical peoples are the victims of their oppressors, not the other way around. It really is that simple, and it pains me to see the hoops people will jump through to dismiss this.

[flovverworks]

u know when u write replies in ur head but end up with no time to physically write them......<3

[angelbesideme]

can i hit on you? she’s hitting on me. she’s hitting on me. why? can i? sure you can.